#and not escaped member is your best friend/ girlfriend/ it's complicated

[lyraarylfyrefly]

oh no! i had thoughts about one of my characters. i decided her name is/was Idris which does NOT help cause i still don't have an actual name for her

she's heavily linked to flat out destruction and escaped a death cult that instilled the idea that she was only meant for destruction

she escaped when she was like 12 and both idolizes and hates the person who seems to be the cult's prophesied savior who will either end the world or the cult bc it was meant to be her and she's glad it wasn't.

she subconsciously believes that she can only destroy and makes herself miserable because of it

she decides to become a magical girl bc maybe then a monster can kill her but she lies to everyone (including herself) and says it's for the money

she's great at fighting but never strategizes unless direct fighting is not an option

she inherently thinks everyone but her relatives from the death cult are better people than her morally

she thinks she's a weapon, and she thinks she doesn't deserve anything she's ever gotten since she escaped

[lunaroseblake]

Adrenaline - Chapter 7 'Amity'

Summary: Zayne and Tara find some common ground.

❤️ Don't forget to like and reblog to support me and my writing ❤️

If you wish to continue reading: AO3, Wattpad <- You can find all the up to date chapters here ^-^

It had taken a while to get a grip of himself, letting his emotions drain out of him until all he felt was a numbing, aching sadness and a wash of tiredness. He’d stayed sat on the floor of his office, the surfaces still sparkling with tiny white ice crystals until a soft knocking on his door brought him out of his thoughts “Dr. Zayne?” It was Greyson. He sighed, closing his eyes, letting his head fall silently back against the wall. He knew he needed to apologise to Greyson for how he spoke to him during surgery but he couldn’t quite muster the energy to face him just yet. Another knock “Dr. Zayne, I have Y/N’s scan results, I thought you might like to see them.” He opened his eyes at that, hesitating before gradually pushing himself to stand and letting the residual frost around the room dissipate altogether before he unlocked the door and turned the handle.

Wordlessly he let Greyson in before moving to go and sit behind his desk, letting the other man take up residency in one of the empty chairs opposite. He didn’t ask to see the results straight away, needing to gather his thoughts fully before seeing them. What if he hadn’t removed all the shards from you, if he’d missed one? Had he fixed all the internal damage you’d sustained? Had he taken too long to restart your heart? The little voice in his mind was coming back to taunt him and he had to shut it down quickly so as not to let his emotions out of check again.

Greyson placed the folder down in front of him on to the desk before leaning back in the chair and folding his arms. Even though Greyson was Zaynes assistant, they were still colleagues and more importantly friends, so he knew that something was wrong “Would you mind telling me what’s going on?” He began, his voice soft, gentle almost “I’ve known you long enough to know you’d never just walk past people waiting for news after a surgery like that… What happened?”

Zayne moved his hands towards the folder, stopping just short of picking it up as noticed his knuckles on one were slightly cut from punching the wall earlier and he quickly moved his other hand to cover it, but Greyson had seen, however chose not to comment on it just yet. A soft sigh escaped him as he finally lifted his eyes to look at Greyson “I apologise for my tone earlier, it was unprofessional-” Greyson held up his hand to stop him “I’m not after an apology Zayne, surgeries such as those are difficult at the best of times, but I can see you’re not okay.” He gestured to the injured hand Zayne was trying to hide “Do you know her?” He asked, gauging Zayne’s reaction closely.

Zayne exhaled, fingers fiddling with the corner of the folder. He knew that you weren’t supposed to operate on people you were close to, it was pushing ethical boundaries, yet he also knew that it wasn’t illegal and he was also the only member of staff here that was qualified enough to be the lead surgeon on a surgery as complicated as that had been. His colleagues knew that he was in a relationship with someone but he had never divulged who you were, what with him also being your primary care physician. Greyson waited patiently as the silence stretched on and Zayne knew he wouldn’t leave until he had an answer so he reluctantly nodded “I love her” He simply said, he hadn’t told you those words himself yet, but after nearly losing you he knew it was more true than he ever thought it to be, he felt it with every fibre in his being.

Greyson sat stunned for a moment “…She’s your girlfriend” He whispered more to himself than anyone in realisation, having quickly put two and two together before he frowned slightly “Zayne, you should have told me.” He ran a tired hand down his face at the information and the implication of it “What were you thinking? You know the rules, ESPECIALLY on a surgery such as that one. You were far too close.”

It was Zaynes turn to frown now, anger simmering “So I should have just sat back? Passed it over to you and done nothing? You would have let her die!” The words were harsh and it came out of him before he could stop it. He knew Greyson was an excellent surgeon but he had also wanted to call your time of death if he hadn’t have continued operating. Greyson blinked at the sting, his lips forming a tight line and he made a move to stand. “Greyson… I’m sorry, I-”

Once again, he was stopped when Greyson raised his hand “I’ll admit you made the right decision this time, but in the future I won’t stand aside Zayne. We both know the consequences of what happens if something had gone wrong.” He gestured to the folder still sitting unopened on the desk “The scans came back clear in terms of any foreign objects and there’s no other internal injuries we may have missed.” His voice had returned to his calm if not tired tone as he stood and stretched, a yawn managing to push its way through “Now, it’s been a really, really long day for the both of us. I suggest you get some rest and maybe for your sake, think about using some of those holiday days you have stacked up. Y/N is going to need someone around.”

With that Greyson began making his way out of the office, only just managing to catch the quiet ’Thankyou’ as he headed out the door, making him smile softly. Zayne took another moment to ready himself before opening the folder, letting his eyes roam over the scan results, triple checking anything and everything to make sure that they’d done all they could for you. Greyson had been right about the fact you were going to need someone, it was going to take a while for you to recover and it wouldn’t be easy, but he was going to be right there with you every step of the way. Maybe taking some time off wasn’t a bad idea after all.

He placed the scans back in to the folder, his mind a little clearer from relief after having seen them allowing him to think more rationally again. Taking his glasses off he placed them down on to the desk before rubbing his eyes, the anxiety and fear fading slightly to give way to tiredness and hunger. As if on cue at realising that he hadn’t eaten since early afternoon the day prior, let alone had a drink, his stomach gave a soft rumble. The sky outside was just beginning to brighten on the horizon as he made his way down to the cafeteria where he spotted Tara sitting alone at a table, a half drunk cup of coffee nestled between her hands in front of her. He grabbed his own coffee, needing the caffeine along with a sweet pastry before he made his way over to her “Mind if I sit?” She’d been so preoccupied with her own thoughts that she jumped slightly at hearing his voice. “Zayne… O- Of corse” She smiled slightly drawing her coffee closer towards her so Zayne could place his items down.

It was quiet for a moment as he sat, neither of them knowing which topic of conversation to start with. He himself wanted to gain more information on the attack but didn’t want to dive straight in to that without knowing whether she’d been told about your condition. Knowing that Tara was your best friend, she deserved to know about your welfare first. He opened his mouth to speak just as she also began speaking causing them to smile awkwardly at one another before he let her continue “How’s Y/N? I assume if you’re here eating pastries then the surgery went okay?” She asked, trying to make the heavy topic a little lighter having gestured towards his food.

He gave a slight nod, taking a sip of his drink “For the most part, yes. I did have to restart her heart again but the surgery after went relatively smoothly. We kept the shards we removed as I assumed you may want them for analysing?” He paused, his eyes watching for her nod of confirmation before he continued “She’s currently in the ICU, a ventilator is helping her breathe until she’s strong enough to do so herself and it’s going to be a little while before she wakes up but I can take you to see her if you like?” It wouldn’t be visiting hours for some time yet, but if Tara was with him then no one would question it. It was also more of a benefit for him in a way, as although he wanted to see you more than anything, the thought of seeing you currently in that state on his own made his heart begin to beat faster and although he wouldn’t admit it, it would be nice to have someone else there too.

Tara also seemed a little apprehensive about seeing you in that condition as her fingers curled and uncurled around her cup “Will… Will she know we’re there?” Her voice was quiet as she looked down at the liquid in her cup, watching as it rippled off the edges from any little movement. She hadn’t let on that she’d been struggling, wanting to help as much as she could with trying to track down the person behind this, so she’d tried to keep herself busy, tried to keep her mind occupied until Jenna had told her to go home to get some rest, but she couldn’t. She’d been the one to hold a bag of blood above you on the street, had seen the damage to your motionless body and the way it contorted when you’d been shocked. She also hadn’t realised just how much blood a person had in them until she saw the pool of it surrounding you and every time she closed her eyes its all she could picture. So with going home out of the question she’d made her way back here to wait.

Her coffee was cold now and she felt tears pricking at her eyes again before they broke the barrier and began tracing their way slowly down her cheeks at remembering. Zayne didn’t miss a beat as he reached over to gently take her hand, he wasn’t usually one to comfort people, being a bit awkward about it but they were both currently in the same boat “She’ll know” He said gently, he knew there was a possibility that you may not be able to hear them but he didn’t tell Tara that. Even when patients were unconscious staff would talk to them whether they were able to hear them or not, it was a comfort for both patients and visitors to know that they weren’t alone.

Tara smiled as she sniffed, wiping the tears away “Look at me crying” She gave a half laugh “Y/N would think me silly for it” She used her clean napkin to wipe at her nose “I’ve just… I’ve never seen someone like that, it’s hard to process it” She murmured and Zayne nodded “It’s not something you ever really get used to. Even as doctors we manage to rationalise it but when it’s someone you care about it’s difficult not to show emotion.” It was silent for a while as Zayne finished his drink and pastry though the silence wasn’t awkward, they simply sat together, each others presence a slight comfort to one another.

In the end he didn’t ask for information about the attack, it wasn’t the right time and he didn’t want to give Tara anymore stress thinking about it. He could see that this had affected her deeply, you were best friends after all, but he knew that even if scary for her it would be best to take her to see you. He stood, clearing away their empty cups and plates “Shall we go?” He asked as Tara collected herself before nodding. The walk to the ICU was quiet, the hospital still very much asleep after a chaotic evening and he paused before the doors, turning to Tara “I will warn you that it might be a shock to see Y/N like this, so it’s best to prepare yourself.” He was telling this to himself as well, he’d seen countless patients in intensive care, knew more than anyone what to expect but seeing you there was a whole other experience.

It was always difficult to predict how people would react at seeing someone they cared about connected up to various machines and fluids, some people broke down almost immediately whereas others put on a strong front, barely showing any flicker of being upset. Tara took a calming breath before she nodded and Zayne swiped his pass, a green light accepting the identity allowing the door to unlock with a soft buzz. He made sure that both he and Tara washed their hands before stepping in to the actual ward and he checked the patient board to see which bay you were in, not that it would be too difficult to find you.

The nurses greeted him as they walked and Tara felt her breathing becoming faster when she saw you, her heart picking up speed and she stopped, freezing in place, not knowing if she could continue. It was incredibly overwhelming, she knew Zayne had said it would be a shock but there were so many wires, tubes and cables attached to you it was jarring. Machinery bleeped around you monitoring your vitals as a soft rhythmic hissing from the ventilator helped you to breathe. What got to her the most though was how pale you were, there was no vibrancy to your face, no colour lighting up your skin and it frightened her. She felt Zayne stop beside her “It’s alright” He said softly “You don’t have to go on if you don’t want to” He’d been far more prepared to know what to expect but it still made his heart ache to see you like this.

Tara shook her head, now wasn’t the time to be selfish, you needed to not be alone, needed to know that someone was there for you “I’m okay” She managed out, her voice trembling slightly, giving away that she wasn’t alright but she was trying to be strong for you. They continued on together, Zayne taking a chair to one side of your bed and Tara seating herself next to you on the other side. She bit her lip as she gently took your hand in hers, trying not to disturb any of the wires around you and unable to help the couple tears that escaped at how unnaturally cold your skin still felt. She breathed a few steadying breaths, letting them calm her nerves before she began to speak to you.

[diwatera]

LGBTQ+ Movies I Watched Recently (Part 2)

Happiest Season (2020) dir. Clea DuVall

Short Summary: Abby plans on proposing to Harper when they visit Harper’s family for the holidays. Her plans get derailed when she learns that Harper hasn’t come out to her family yet.

Why you should watch it: Not gonna lie, Mackenzie Davis drew me to this movie; I’ve been in love with her ever since San Junipero came out. Add Kristen Stewart, Aubrey Plaza and Dan Levy to the mix and I’m sold. If you want a sapphic romance with a happy ending, this one’s for you. 

Été 85 (2020) dir.  François Ozon

Short Summary: Alexis recounts his six-week love affair with David during the summer of ‘85. 

Why you should watch it: If you love 80s aesthetic and music, you definitely should watch this. The movie made me nostalgic of that decade and I wasn’t even alive back then! It’s a whirlwind summer romance reminiscent of Call Me by Your Name but with a more devastating twist.

Getting Go: The Go Doc Project (2013) dir. Cory James Krueckeberg

Short Summary: An obsessed college boy pursues his internet crush through the pretext of making a documentary about him.

Why you should watch it: The script and the acting are the one-two punch of this film. The writing is incredibly genuine, and both of the actors’ performances made the lines feel even more natural. I’m not the biggest fan of mockumentary-style films, but this one felt like it was a recording of my own life. Hyper-obsessive college grad with a Tumblr blog? Might as well have called out half the population of this damn site.

Pihalla (2017) dir. Nils-Erik Ekblom

Short Summary: Miku and Elias find themselves, and each other, during a summer in the Finnish countryside.

Why you should watch it: I’m a sucker for gays in the countryside™ and although this one is not quite up there with God’s Own Country and Call Me by Your Name, it still makes for a good watch. Miku as a character and his relationship with his parents was chaotic and fun. His relationship with Elias felt really natural and dreamy. 

You, Me and Him (2017) dir. Daisy Aitkens

Short Summary: Olivia, a mature responsible lawyer, wants to have a baby, but her girlfriend Alex isn’t ready for the responsibility. Things get even more complicated when their flirty neighbour, John, joins the picture. 

Why you should watch it: It is one of the most feel-good lesbian romcoms I have seen in a while. But I warn you, there are some dark parts that can really sneak up on you. Yeah, it’s hilarious, but damn it made me ugly cry, too. Oh, and if you want to see David Tennant as an alpha male douchebag, here’s your chance. (CW: **spoiler alert** p̶r̶e̶g̶n̶a̶n̶c̶y̶ ̶l̶o̶s̶s̶ )

Giant Little Ones (2018) dir. Keith Behrman 

Short Summary: Franky and Ballas have been best friends since childhood, both on the swimming team, both incredibly popular. But after an incident during Franky’s birthday, they quickly fall apart and Franky falls from grace.

Why you should watch it: I think the film captures just how tumultuous coming-of-age stories are. Franky is going through his own journey of self-identity, and I’m happy that the movie didn’t rush in with labels. The conversation Franky has with his dad at the end also hits hard.  (CW: physical assault, allusions to sexual assault)

Our Love Story (2016) dir. HyunJu Lee

Short Summary: A fine arts student meets an attractive bartender, and the two women begin an intimate relationship.

Why you should watch it: It’s a very intimate love story that isn’t rushed or dragged out for too long. We definitely see Yoon-Jo and Ji-Soo’s relationship bloom from start to end, but it’s not mind-numbingly boring to watch. Raw and unembellished, I definitely recommend this to anyone looking for a realistic portrayal of wlw romance.

Die Mitte der Welt (2016) dir. Jakob M. Erwa

Short Summary: The film follows Phil and his relationship with his family, his best friend, and a newcomer at his school, Nicholas.

Why you should watch it: This is technically a second watch for me, and I’m glad I rewatched it, because I was able to catch some glaring red flags that I missed the first time. I love this movie in spite of all the heartache it caused me. The story, especially the deal with Phil’s family, struck a chord in me. And the shots! Visually stunning as well! 

Les Amours Imaginaires (2010) dir. Xavier Dolan

Short Summary: Marie and Francis’ friendship is put to the test when a beautiful boy called Nicolas comes between them. 

Why you should watch it: Watch it for the visuals -- the colors, the costumes, the cast. Seriously, the actors included here may as well be kept in the Louvre: Xavier Dolan, Neils Schneider, Monia Chokri, hell, even a cameo from Louis Garrel! Dolan said it himself that this is a shallow film, but it’s worth the watch just to see Neils Schneider wearing heart-shaped glasses.

Closet Monster (2015)  dir. Stephen Dunn

Short Summary: A creative and driven teenager is desperate to escape his hometown and the haunting memories of his turbulent childhood.

Why you should watch it: Right off the bat, I am going to say that this film is dark. I tried watching it back in college but tapped out within the first ten minutes because something traumatic happens. Then I tried again about a week ago, finished it this time. It’s actually a very moving film. It’s violent and gory in some parts, but also ridiculous and wholesome in other parts. IT HAS A TALKING HAMSTER NAMED BUFFY! BUFFY WAS THE STAR OF THIS MOVIE FOR ME. (CW: gay bashing/sexual assault)

Straight Up (2020) dir. James Sweeney

Short Summary: Todd and Rory are intellectual soul mates. He might be gay but she might not care.

Why you should watch it: The dialogue in this film is undeniably sharp and witty. Loved the fast-paced back and forth between the two main characters as they discuss relationships, sex, gender, and more. James Sweeney and Katie Findlay’s chemistry just pulled you into the screen. It was funny, it was sweet, it was heartwrenching, it was great! (CW: allusions to sexual assault)

Latter Days (2003) dir. C. Jay Cox

Short Summary: A promiscuous gay party animal falls for a young Mormon missionary, leading to crisis, cliché, and catastrophe.

Why you should watch it: I saw this in santiagonex’s top 20 LGBTQ+ films with happy endings, and I honestly thought it was gonna be a feel-good watch. Instead, I got a rollercoaster melodrama filled with early 2000s gay culture, religious guilt, buttcheeks, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Needless to say, I got more than I bargained for. (CW: self-harm, conversion therapy)

The Old Guard (2020) dir. Gina Prince-Blythewood

Short Summary:  A covert team of immortal mercenaries are suddenly exposed and must now fight to keep their identity a secret just as an unexpected new member is discovered.

Why you should watch it: Okay, I was debating whether I should include this here, because it’s not necessarily an LGBTQ+ film as much as it is an action film with queer characters. I decided to include it, because JESUS! I have never seen such respectful and well-written representation of queer characters and relationships. Joe and Nicky are the most unproblematic couple in history. PERIOD. Pray for sequels, everyone. This is the kind of representation we deserve in mainstream media. 

. . .

Click here for more LGBTQ+ film recs

[yandere-wishes]

Yandere Charcter Encyclopedia

A list of some requested charcters and the types of yandere’s they would be. I might open requests for a part two later idk yet. 

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

Twisted Wonderland

Vil Schoenheit is  controlling and possessive.

You need to be the BEST!

It's more so this lovesick notion that Vil seems to be "in love with" rather than you as a person. No one knows exactly why Vil chose you as his dearly significant other and Vil has never given any inkling as to why he favors you above everybody else. It's a paradox, an unsolvable mystery. But the truth is Vil fell in love with you, not for your looks, nor your personality, heck you didn't even really do some outstanding gesture that pulled at his heartstrings, no, instead you did nothing. Confusing, I know but let me explain, you were a nobody. No breathtaking looks, no fantastic personality, no influential family. There was NOTHING special about you! This means you had the potential to be something special, something extraordinary and the only person in the universe who could raise you to such levels was nonother than the head of Pomfiore, Vil Schoenheit!

Every day he spends hours making sure you look perfect, a face painted in just the right ways to make others believe you had the features of an angel sent from above. Posture so straight, shoulders pulled back to make others think you were the long lost heiress to some fallen family. Never once did you speak out of place or with a tone harboring too many emotions, every word that left your mouth was so well thought out and prepared that others could only suspect you were some sort of genius.

You were nothing, that's what made Vil notice you in the first place, that's what made him mold you into the perfect someone. Whatever you are now is only thanks to your darling, caring lover...never forget that. 

Rook Hunt is delusional.

Rook's brain is an incredibly messed up place and it only gets worst the longer he's around you. You are a little rabbit, nimble and sweet and he is the hunter that wants to stick a bow right through your beating heart, a lovely pair you two make, wouldn't you agree? But the more he stalks you, following you around like a second shadow. The more he realizes that he doesn't want you simply for the thrill of a small chase...oh no, he wants to keep you. Put you in a golden cage and throw away the key. You're not some rare catch like le roi des lions or a breathtaking sight like le roi des poisons. No instead you're simple, you aren't a game of nither wit nor strength, you are simply a game of love. Because you love him already don't you? You know he's been following you and doesn't do anything about it because you want him to catch you, right? You want the greatest hunter to hit you with his cupid's arrow so you can fall into his awaiting arms, right where you belong!

Azul is manipulative (were you guys seriously expecting something else?) 

Azul is all calculations and deals, all wit and talk. He's got guts to go up against just about anyone he meets and he’s smart enough to turn them into a fish out of water. So maybe it was his confidence that let’s you slip away with lax deals, bending the rules for a helpless little angelfish such as yourself. He doesn't notice that he has feelings for you, not until you stroll into the VIP room of the Mostro Lounge looking for your "dearest friend Azul", all to simply ask him for a contract to make the lousy excuse of an Ignyhide dorm leader fall in love with you. It's then and there that Azul decides it's time to toughen up the rules, tighten the noose around your pretty little neck. You don't even notice until you're rejected by Idia and some strang red string is dragging you into Azul's waiting embrace. 

Kalim is delusional and obsessive.

To Kalim, this is just another heart-filled game. You belong to him and he belongs to you, it's simple! The two of you are so in love...it's just you're a little shy when it comes to admitting it! That's okay, Kalim knows a few drinks from the land of hot sands that will loosen your tongue and if that fails there's always Jamil's hypnosis magic that can make you confess! Look, no matter how you go about it, Kalim is just all so convinced that you love him that it doesn't matter what you really think!

Ruggie is manipulative (Lord have mercy on you people the day I finally muster up the courage to write Savancalw yandere  headcanons)

Oh sure, male hyenas are passive when it comes to females everyone knows that! But whilst Ruggie does follow -albeit loosely- the reserved yet desperate routines of hyena courtship, he leans more towards suffocating his chosen mate with his presence rather than showing a desperate side of himself. He's always circling his chosen darling, stalking them down the halls, trailing after them all over campus, he never leaves them alone. Any confrontations from his darling will lead to an immediate sob story. Something about how he could smell food in your bag and didn't have any money to buy his own meal or maybe about how he never met a girl as cute as you in slums so he had no idea how to approach you properly. Of course, this is all a hoax, he just needs you to drop your guard, to look him in the eyes with your sad, heart-throbbing orbs, then it's game over, you're all his. "Hey, what's with the dull face? come on, laugh with me skskksks~".

Jack is a protective.

It's only natural really, wolves are overprotective when it comes to their pack members and sure maybe you aren't really a part of his pack per se. But that doesn't mean he's just going to leave you to fend for yourself. You're all so small and frail, you could never hold your own against anyone! Let alone all the mages in NRC. But Jack can, he can protect you and defend himself, it's not a problem. He's very likely torn on whether or not to actually kidnap his darling. On one hand, he doesn't want you to hate him for stealing you away from your friends, he wouldn't want to play the role of the big bad wolf in your story. But on the other hand, poor Jack just isn't lucid enough to fully understand that whisking you away is wrong. In the end, you probably just wind up in his room locked away, or better yet, protected from all the horrors of the outside world.

Deuce is an obsessive 

He just wants to be around you all the time. It's mostly some deep routed paranoia that at any fleeting moment you'll somehow abandon him finding refuge with either Cater or Ace. Maybe you find their lazy stupid mannerisms amusing, is that it? If you want lazy, he can be lazy too! Or maybe you want to be with Riddle? Do you like guys who are mean spirited and quick to anger? He can yell! He can yell so much better than Riddle can! Deuce will do anything, anything at all to get you to stay with him. Even if some of his tactics are a little more painful and involve some broken bones. 

Hypnosis Mic

Jakurai  is possessive and protective 

He's overbearing to put it simply, constantly hovering around you, ghosting his fingers over your flesh, or leaving lingering kisses on any patch of exposed skin. First and foremost Jakurai is a doctor, so it's his nature to be nurturing, sure you can accept that much. But what he does to you isn't nurturing in any way shape or form! Juakurai isn't above using sedatives and other forms of medications to keep you compliant, that's not what a good doctor should do, you're both lucid enough to know that. But to Ill-Doc you leave him no other choice, you're constantly disobeying him, trying to find some underhanded way to leave him. So what else can the poor man do! He needs to keep his only escape from the tedious loneliness he's been cursed with, safe!

kamigami no asobi

Balder is possessive and obsessive

He can't help it, there's just something so radiant and sparkling inside of you, something that he can't let get tainted by the darkness that rests within others. You're always walking on thin ice around him, chewing every single word before conversing, calculating every single step before daring to make the slightest move. One wrong look or miscalculated word could get him to spiral into a fit madness, and this time there won't be anyone to save you. But that's only if you do the wrong thing! Just keep playing the role of the loving, adoring girlfriend and there won't be any further...complications. If you simply show him how much you love him, Balder can become all so sickly sweet. A perfect doting boyfriend, constantly sharing his precious meat with you and dressing you up in prettiest lavish gowns from Asgard. 

Obey me

Asmodeus is sneaky 

The avatar of lust is used to swift meaningless relationships, too caught up in the passion and pleasure to really care about the other person. But with his darling things are different. Oh sure, the lust and sexual tension is still there, always hovering around the air like a thick unbreakable fog. Accept this time there's something else, a sort of jealous aroma blowing through the dense mist. It's intoxicating, making Asmoudaus crave only his little darling, he only wants to look at them, touch them, kiss only them! It's almost like he's addicted to every itty bitty detail about his newfound lover. Will Asmodeus get bored of the relationship over time? Absolutely! But will he ever actually leave his darling to their own devices? Hell no! Asmodeus may have the right to cheat on his darling but they can NEVER so much as think about another man other than him! HE.OWNS.THEM! Their body, mind, soul, it all belongs to him!

Black Butler

Snake is Jealous  (I haven't written for black butler since, like, sixth grade) 

Snake does love you, this is an evident fact, he never once leaves your side. It's suffocating sure, but it's only because the scaled boy is so paranoid that you might run away with someone else, someone normal. His snakes (mostly Emily) are always chaining the two of you together, constantly curling around your skin so you won't get any ideas to escape. Lord forbid you so much as look at another man, that'll make the white-haired snake charmer go into a fit of pure utter rage. normally Snake won't punish you, but when his jealousy gets too much to keep inside he'll let it out by screaming at you. Asking you if you find him repulsive if you wish to leave him for someone who looks normal. This will than lead to him crushing you in his arms, begging you not to leave him! Overall Snake is one of the tamer yandere of the  Phantomhive residence, a real blessing in disguise. 

mystic messenger

Saeyoung is obsessive 

It's really all just a small accident, this was never really meant to happen, he wasn't meant to fall in love with you. Saeyoung probably just came across your profile whilst on the web, scrolling through some database or another. like I said, IT.WAS.AN.ACCIDENT...and yet all so many times accidents can lead to something...more. Saeyoung doesn't know what particular thing it was about you that caught his attention, maybe it was your cute face or some little odd, out of place detail in your bio. Either way, it has the red-haired hacker surfing through every site just to learn more about you. Picking the internet apart just to find out some small fragments of your personal life. It's become a sort of hobby -addiction-  of his, stalking your every move through trackers and reverse cameras. One day he might even gather the courage to speak to you in person, but for now, he's content watching your pretty face from behind a screen. 

Code Realize

Impey is Obessasive and clingy

It's your smile, right from the get-go, Impey was enthralled by your cheerful smile. It makes his heart skip a beat, his palms grow sweaty, and his breath hitches in his throat. He just adores that pearly white grin. He's constantly pestering you, poking your cheek, and asking you to smile for him just once more. "Just a small smile, please~". His clinginess is mostly due to the fear of losing you or more so having you stolen from him. That's why he never let's go of your hand and is constantly locking you in his room. "I'm the only one that deserves to see that smile" it's such a childish phrase, primarily when it's accompanied by his renowned pout. Of course, things start to go downhill when you outright refuse to smile. Choosing instead to cry and scream, begging someone to save you from this mad man. Impey is borderline delusional if he thinks you'll ever smile for him again, after the stunt he's pulled.

[boxofbadaddiction]

A Likely Story

Fred Weasley x Reader

Warnings: Swearing.

This story is inspired from a request of my F.R.I.E.N.D.S Themed Prompt List.

Prompts: 9, 16 & 18

"They don't know that we know they know"

"DANGER!"

"What a small world./Yet I never run into Beyoncè"

"What'd you tell George?"

"Told him I had detention with Snape for setting off Dungbombs in his Second Years class."

"Hmm, very believable."

"That's because it's true."

"Why am I not surprised?"

"What'd you tell your mates?"

"Just said I was going for a walk."

"Guess that'll do. Remind me to give you some pointers on how to lie when we get back."

"Very funny."

Every word spoken echoed off the damp walls of the One Eyed Witch Passage as Fred and Y/n made their way through the dark tunnel. The only source of light being the soft glow emitting from the tips of their wands, allowing only enough visibility to see just infront of them as they walked.

The pair were currently sneaking from the Castle on a day which were not allocated for any Hogsmead Visitations. It were a school day. However, rather than sitting about the Castle grounds for the two free periods in their schedules, Fred had the brilliant idea of escaping the unbearable reign of Umbridge - even if only for a few hours, by taking a trip into town.

"You know they know, right?"

"Ahh, but they don't know that we know they know. Now do they?" Fred grinned as he shoved y/ns shoulder with his own playfully, before intertwining their cold fingers. "I fail to see how that matters" "makes it all the more fun." "Whatever makes you happy, Big Guy." "You mean, aside from you?"

Y/n rolled her eyes at his cheesiness, but smiled nonetheless. Stopping abruptly from a harsh tug at her hand, one that had her being pulled flush against Fred - chest to chest.

Threading his wand between his fingers, he brought his other hand to the back of y/ns neck and kissed her deeply.

The kiss left her flushed, biting her lip to suppress a giddy smile which naturally only caused a smug grin to appear on the face of her partner.

Sensing how inflated his ego was becoming y/n stepped back, shoving his chest, "Hurry up and get me out of here, loverboy, I'm freezing."

This wasn't the first time the two had been in a situation such as this. They had been in a relationship for quite a few months now but were keeping it secret - for the most part anyway, but they knew the others were suspicious.

There were several reasons why they felt their relationship needed to remain secret. One being for the fact Y/n were a Slytherin. Whom for as long as anyone could remember had despised the Weasleys, and vice versa. The second, and most crucial reason was due to y/ns family. She was a Y/l/n. A family who, like the Malfoys and LeStrange, were blood purists and for that matter hated Muggles, Muggleborns and Blood Traitors alike. A trait not inherited by that of the y/l/ns only daughter. Y/n.

After overcoming the years of conditioning by her parents; painting the Weasleys, anyone alike and Muggleborns as the enemy or lessers, she'd surrounded herself with friends of all houses and blood-status.

She even discovered there to be a remarkable amount of similarities between herself and that of the Redheaded family. Soon enough finding herself regularly in comfortable conversation with the Twins during their shared classes, after years of the ridiculous feud between them buried itself in the past. It then naturally didn't take long for her to start falling for the older, louder, Twin.

Though people acknowledged she were different to her family the pair were still hesitant about the reaction they'd receive being together in public, so they thought it best to keep to themselves. Which lead to a lot of sneaking around. Hence todays secret date in Hogsmead.

A few moments later Fred and Y/n reached the trap door of Honeydukes Cellar. Fred was the one to check the coast were clear. Smiling as he watched the owners feet retreating up the basements staircase to the store above. Piece of Cauldron Cake he thought. They silently slipped through the shop, completely unnoticed.

Glad to finally have the freedom to be with one another openly the two let out relieved breaths upon being met with the chilly fresh air of Hogsmead.

They happily strolled throughout the streets hand-in-hand going about their usual routine. A quick stop to The Three Broomsticks for a couple Butterbeers then off to what they'd deemed as "their spot", a clearing by the forest over looking the Shrieking Shack where they regularly met of a weekend for lunch and much needed time together.

Fred was spinning his girlfriend as if dancing as they walked, smiling, laughing and unashamedly flirting loudly as they did so.

The two were in a world of their own as they rough housed in the soft snow, throwing handfuls at one another. Unfortunately, blissfully unaware of the approaching complication in their secret rendezvous.

"Well, well, well." Came a cold voice from behind them, one which sent chills down y/ns spine - she would know that voice anywhere. Lucius Malfoy.

The teenagers turned with identical deadpan expressions to the man before them. "What a small world." "And yet I never run into Beyoncè" y/n countered sarcastically, her tone bitter and harsh.

"Whatever would one make of this, Hmm? A y/l/n fraternising with a Weasley..." Luicus eyed Fred with distaste, as if it were unsettling to simply be in his presence.

Fred stood tall and firm in place; a murderous glare thrown towards the arrogant man as he grit his teeth.

"One?" Y/ns brow raised in question, her voice drawing Malfoys attention back to her. He simply nodded in response, causing the girl to scoff as realisation struck. An exasperated smile tugging at her lips whilst she spoke, "Right. Going to rat me out to Daddy for having a friend, Lucius?" "But of course not." He took a step closer to the couple, "for being outside the grounds of Hogwarts, accompanied by an irresponsible and perpetually reckless boy however..." y/n swallowed harshly, a wave of fear coursing through her veins as her confidence faltered.

"Well, one might say it were my responsibility to report your little...adventure today. My, I can't begin to imagine the misfortune one might be subjected to less the High Inquisitor learn of such a blatant disregard for school protocols. Those for the offenders...or the Headmaster for that matter."

Y/n was silently panicking at these words. Dumbledore has already been on thin ice with the Ministry recently. If anyone finds out, well...that'd be the end of him.

"Of course however, y/n, you would be forgiven on account of your-" "Father." "-innocence, clearly under the manipulation of this one, whom would naturally be expelled." Lucius lazily waved his hand towards Fred. "You don't even know which Weasley 'this one' is." Y/n snapped. "Unimportant. I imagine Delores will be thrilled at the opportunity of finally ridding both from the school. And as for Dumbledore-"

"You're getting ahead of yourself, Malfoy." Fred finally spoke. Stepping forward to stand slightly infront of y/n protectively. His jaw and fists were clenched in rage, knuckles turning ghostly white under the strain in his grip. "Am I?" "Yes. To snitch on us you'd first need proof we were here in the first place." "You Weasleys truly are daft. I believe I have all the 'proof' I'll be needing. Given the fact you are stood right here before me, far from the saftey of the school grounds." "Are we?" Fred subtly reached for y/ns hand as he spoke, holding her palm tight behind his back, eyes staring directly into Malfoys challenging his dominance.

"Because I'm sure if you were to go to the Castle right now; I could be found with my brother and y/n here...undoubtedly studying in the Library." "Is that so?" Lucius had a rather done and ugly expression on his face at Freds antics, whom began smiling wickedly. Uttering a simple "yep." In response.

Their stare-off was broken as Fred glanced over Malfoys shoulder, raising his free arm to wave he greeted loudly, "Hello, Hagrid!" This causing the blonde man to turn in his direction. That was Fred's cue. Taking advantage of the moment and apparating the pair to the passage of the Shrieking Shack.

They took off running, hand-in-hand as they manoeuvred the winding tunnel to the school. Sprinting so quickly that even the Whomping Willow were too slow to react to their sudden appearance as they breached the grounds.

As they reached the, thankfully empty, courtyard they finally allowed themselves the opportunity to breathe and dropped the hold of one anothers hand. Fred swallowed thickly to ease the burning in his throat, "you have to-" "yeah. And you need to-" "yeah."

Exhausted and amused chuckles fell from their lips at the understanding shared between them. Placing one final, frantic, kiss to one anothers lips as goodbye they held each other close not wanting to let go. One of y/ns hands gripped Freds hair tightly whilst the other bunched in the fabric of his shirts collar. Both his hands placed securely on her waist. Y/n whines, knowing he won't be able to break the kiss himself, focusing all her strength she pushed from his chest, "Go" she whispered. Sighing frustratedly from the loss of his lips on hers he nods in agreement before both begin running in opposite directions.

Now thankful he had such a large family Fred was quickly successful in finding a family member to cling himself to. Barrelling down the corridor to where Ron and Harry were walking and conversing over whatever, with their backs to him. Overestimating the force of his current momentum he collided forcefully with the boys shoulders in attempt to steady himself, nearly toppling all three.

"What's your problem!?" Ron snapped angrily. "DANGER!" Fred whisper yelled, very out of breath. The scene brought a rather wide smile to Harrys face, watching as the Twin clutched his side painfully and tried to speak. "If-If anyone asks. I've been here the whole-WHOLE time. Okay!?" He was gesturing wildly between the three of them as he spoke, appearing desperate.

"Oh yeah? And what's in it for us?" Ron asked cockily. "For you, little Brother..." "anything?" He smiled smugly, earning a clap on the shoulder from his flustered older brother. "Not quite, Ronniekins."

Fred's eyes turned dark as he straightened himself, grip tightening on Rons shoulder like a vice. "Cover for me this time and you get to live another day." Ron was wincing at the pain being inflicted by the hold on his shoulder, "You-you can't do anything to me." Harry looked sceptical at this, it was Fred Weasley afterall.

"Can't I? It's a big Castle, Ronnie. Accidents happen." Fred's stare hadn't left Ron's eyes the whole time he spoke. A smirk forming on his face as if taking joy in the countless possibilities he had playing on his mind.

Noticing the poorly restrained fear spreading through his brother as Ron gulped thickly he lightened his grip knowing he's won.

"F-fine. Doesn't bother me anyway. Not like it's a huge inconvenience is it, Harry?" Ron tried to play the moment off cooly, though the panic was evident on his voice. "Not at all" Harry laughed but suddenly his expression soured. Looking forward to the entrance of the hall.

"Is that...Lucius?" The Weasleys heads turned to see the pale face of Malfoy striding towards them accompanied by Delores and...oh God. Freds blood ran cold.

"It is, and Titus Y/l/n! What are they doing here?" Ron growled.

"Danger. Danger. Danger." Fred mumbled from the side of his mouth, avoiding eye contact and looking quite nervous, though he played it off much better than his brother had. The boys looked up to him "You didn't..." they spat. Fred cleared his throat as a warning, and it worked just as well as a confession in Harry and Rons opinion, as the three adults approached.

"Potter." "Malfoy."

"Weasley." "Y/l/n."

"Eh-hem" the teens rolled their eyes. "Professor?"

"Tell me, Mr Weasley" she began, looking straight to Fred, "can you account for your whereabouts this afternoon?" "With these two."

"Where's your Twin?" Lucius rudely interrupted. "Haven't the foggiest. Since, ya know...I'm not with him." "It is strange" Umbridge began, "that you are without your Twin, seeing as how you are rarely to find one without the other." She giggled sickly. "Yeah, rarely. But not never."

At his words Lucius' expression became proud and more confident, turning to Delores now to speak. "He's the one. I'm sure of it." "The one what?"

"Enough of this. My daughter, where is she?" Titus interjects. "What...y/n? Stuffed if I know. Don't fancy myself much a snake charmer. What's with the interrogation?"

"Well it would seem, Mr Malfoy here has a rather interesting story to share on the topic of two seventh years strolling about Hogsmead not even an hour ago. A Weasley and-"

"My daughter. Where is she!?"

"I've already told you. I don't know!" Titus began advancing on Fred, rage burning clear in his eyes, "I'm warning you, Weasley. If you've in anyway involved yourself with y/n I will-"

"Dad?" A soft voice called from the end of the corridor. "Y/n." The girl looked around at the gathered group confusedly before stepping between Fred, Harry and Ron to embrace her Father in a quick greeting. "What are you doing here?" "Where have you been?" "Where-what? I've been-" "the Library perhaps?" Lucius raised a mocking brow. "What? No I-I was taking a walk by the Lake." "A likely story."

"Lucius here, tells me you were in Hogsmead with this boy." Titus gestures to Fred a venom held behind his voice.

Y/n looks over Fred with visible disgust, whilst he smiles coldly back. "Why on Earth would I ever surround myself with the likes of them?" She spits. Looking back to her Father as if highly insulted by his accusation.

Titus observes the interaction carefully as if watching for any weakness in their story. But he finds none. His expression softens as he turns back to his daughter completely. "I apologise, y/n/n. Lucius was obviously mistaken." He glares back over his shoulder to the blonde man who scoffs in response. "I would nev-" "Save it, Lucius." Titus growls. "But, Titus if I may, why would Mr Malfoy report this if it were not-" "you may not." The girls father puts an end to Umbridges interruption as she'd attempted to defend the other man. "I trust my daughter to know of the correct company to keep. Lucius was obviously mistaken and has by extension wasted my time."

Thankfully the adults were too busy bickering for anyone to notice the small smiles that threaten to break onto the faces of the gathered teenagers.

"I'm sorry, dear. I must be leaving now and I hope your studies are going well." "They are Dad, I'll write you and Mum tonight to fill you in on everything. Just as I always do." Y/n smiled. Titus pulled his daughter in for a final hug, placing a soft kiss to her forehead before turning to leave, with a last menacing glare to Delores and Lucius he walked away.

"Well. That will be all, the four of you off to your Common rooms immediately to prepare for dinner. Mr Malfoy if you'd follow me I'll escort you from the Castle." Umbridge spoke.

Harry and Ron couldn't contain their giggles at the insulted reaction shown by Malfoy as he turned to leave.

Lucius took one final look over his shoulder to the teens, who had not moved, being met with the taunting smile and small wave of y/n with Fred now standing confidently beside her.

Once finally out of sight the couple fell into hysterics, Fred wrapping an arm around y/ns shoulder as they laughed.

"What the bloody hell did you two do!?" Ron asked through a wide grin. "Just took a quick trip into town that's all..." "Safe to say our secrets out, Freddie." Y/n whispered to him as she noted all the students watching the group, paying particular attention to Freds arm around her. "Secret? You kidding! You two are the most obvious people on the planet!" Harry quipped. "George has been taking bets on how long it'll take for you two to just come out and admit it." "I know." Spoke Fred, "I had Colin Creevey place 7 Sickles on it for me." "You bet on us!?" "The odds were on my side! But thanks to Malfoy date-crashing I'm out of it now."

"About that, how did you two get back here so fast?" Ron questions.

"We apparated to The Shack then hauled ass." Y/n answered. "The pros of being 17" Fred winked, pulling y/n back into his chest, resting his chin atop her head. As his arms wrapped around her she nestled herself comfortably within his embrace with a lovestruck smile.

"Right well, as amusing as that was, this-" Ron guestured to the couple, "is gonna turn my stomach. And I'm starving so, Harry, coming to get ready for dinner?" the bluntness causing his best friend to roll his eyes with a chuckle. "Yeah alright. And I'll be sure to tell George all about this if we run into him along the way." Harry joked, waving to the couple as they walked towards the Gryffindor common room.

They stood there for a moment, contently basking in each others warmth before y/n turned in place to face her boyfriend with a cheekily grin. "So, still think I need tips on how to lie?" Fred clicks his jaw as he pretends to be deep in thought. Nodding slowly as he answers, "yeah, yep. Absolutely." "I just successfully dooped not only my Father but Delores fucking Umbridge! Okay? I deserve a frickin' gold star."

Fred can't help but laugh at her comment. "Alright, first of all. 'Dooped'? That is the least cool thing you've ever said. Secondly, you're so cute when you get all sassy. And unfortunately for you, I'm fresh out of gold stars...but I'll happily reward you for that semi-decent performance." Y/ns mouth falls open at the last words, "semi-decent!?" Fred nods innocently, "You sir, are a twat!" She states firmly as she pushes out of his arms making the redhead laugh loudly.

Taking a strong grip to her wrist as she begins to walk away he pulls her back to him, wrapping an arm around her waist as the other fists the hair at the nape of her neck pulling her lips into his.

The kiss is hard and passionate, as if he's trying to make up for their spoiled date in this one moment. And it's working, fireworks erupt within y/ns chest as goosebumps spread over her skin and she can't help the soft moans that sound from her throat. It's perfect.

Fred smiles as he rests his forehead against hers, feeling like he's drunk an entire Cauldron of love potion. "You were brilliant today, love." He whispers. "Fred, that kiss was...wow." he hums in response. "I still want the star though." she goads making him roll his eyes and throw his head back in exasperation. She can feel the silent laughter radiate through his body as she holds him close bringing her head to rest against his chest.

Freds arms hold y/n tighter as he lets out a comfortable sigh, placing his head atop of hers. Eyes softly closing in complete bliss. As fun as all the sneaking around was he could get used to this. Holding her when, where and for as long as he wants? To Fred, that sounds exactly like Heaven.

[marinetteplztakeabreak]

chloe in my adrininogami roommates au

under the cut bc its a little long (1500 words of notes about chloe in this au)

ADRININOGAMI ROOMATES AU RECAP: its not really an au its just a timejump, Adrien Nino and Kagami are all like 18-19 and roommates, hawkmoth is still out there and lb and cn still dont know each others’ identities, Nino and Kagami know each others’ secret identities but don’t know Adrien’s and he doesn’t know theirs, Nino is at university while Adrien and Kagami are just taking a gap year and working minimum wage jobs and honestly they are all thriving and bffs

Chloe is a music major

At the same university as Nino

i have very little knowledge of the universities of Paris so this is going to be partially based on the American system, im sorry but youre going to have to suspend your disbelief real quick

so the university has a rule where first year students have to live on campus in the dorms

Nino escaped this rule because he is a goshdarn music nerd and quest for knowlege cannot be stopped

There wasn’t even an AP Music Theory class at his high school when he started there but he was like “whats up guys i have self-confidence now and i think it would be pretty nifty if we had this class” and then talked to teachers and convinced a bunch of his friends to sign up for it so now its a class

And thats the only AP Music class and he still wanted to learn,,, so he just,,, started taking online college courses,,, in music theory,,, for fun,,,, the absolute nerd <3

he will ramble excitedly about music history to anyone who will listen and you cant even be upset bc he is so energetic about this

All of this is to say that, by the time he graduated high school, he had already completed a bunch of college classes, so he got to enter university as a sophomore, which is how he is living off campus with adrien and kagami

Chloe, however, is a freshman, so shes gotta live on campus in the freshman dorms and have a roommate

her roommate, by the way, is Juleka

Chloe has calmed down significantly by this time and sucks a lot less. She and Juleka are not friends by any account, but basically, when they were signing up for roommates, they were both like “whelp this is better than rooming with a total stranger, i wont talk to you or bother you if you dont talk to me”

chloe and juleka have not actually spoken to each other since school started,, they pretty much stay out of the dorm room unless they are sleeping and then they stay on their side of the room and do not make eye contact and dont touch each others stuff

and chloe is totally fine with this

just kidding, hahaha, she is sad and lonely and wants to make friends but is terrible at it,,, her models for friendship include Adrien who she knows she messed up with completely and the best thing she can do now for their relationship is avoid him so she doesnt mess it up more,, and Sabrina, who is also refusing to speak to her now and basically taught chloe that the way to do friendship is to like? do their homework or something??

(juleka is vibing and living her best life btw, shes just also an introvert and only goes to the dorm when she is tired and needs to refresh and also chloe is the one acting like they shouldnt talk)

SO,,, chloe is a music major bc she thinks its pretty nifty and fun and also because she is trying to avoid anything to do with her parents,,, she has reached the point where like “be a dissapointment to my parents” is like,, her life goal,,, which is kinda a “good for her” situation and kinda a “holy heck plz get her some therapy situation”

wow we’ve got a bunch of backstory but we are finally to the point of this post

Chloe has several classes with Nino and she keeps accidentally flocking to him because she already knows him from high school and he has such good vibes

Nino is kind of just trying to avoid her,, he doesnt HATE her,, but,, it is chloe,, yknow

but then they get paired up for a group project and the group meets at nino’s apartment, and adrien is not in the building whenever chloe is there, on purpose,, they will be friends again eventually but their friendship is taking a little bit of a break and adrien is still learning how to have boundaries so he’s just doing what’s best for his mental health

chloe is totally fine with this and doesnt miss him at all

just kidding she is lying

BUT

you know who IS just chilling in the apartment while chloe is there

kagami

who is now like 19 and having some actual self confidence and happiness and who is chilling in her apartment with nino, one of her best friends

and chloe gets through the first group meetup at nino’s house and doesn’t spent any time just staring at kagami who’s chilling reading books in the corner (yes she does)

chloe is actually trying her hardest to be nice to the group members and make friends and prove that she can be a good person and a hard worker but she has very little social skills or work ethics skills and is having complicated emotions about adrien and hasnt even realized it yet but she is falling HARD for kagami,

all that is to say that chloe is a little bit distracted from the group project

but anyway they meet up again and this time chloe has done a ton of research and prep beforehand bc she doesnt want 2 be caught offguard made to look like a fool again and everyone is like what the heck, since when does she study things?

and anyway the project goes pretty great

but then

chloe has a goshdarn crying breakdown

because she is experiencing too many emotions all at once

the combination of just,,, university coursework is stressful and living without servants for the very first time in her life and parental issues and not having friends and also literally everything is just aaaa

so she starts crying in her dorm while doing homework while juleka is there but she literally forgets that juleka is there bc juleka is kind of a cryptid

and juleka just kinda stares at her for a minute and then is like “u good”

and chloe tries to pretend shes not startled and is like “haha yeah its fine”

and juleka is like “have u considered getting a tutor”

and chloe, who is stupid, is like “hmm i should ask nino to tutor me but only at his place and only when kagami is home and i should make sure that i look super cute and i need to study beforehand so that i look cool and smart in front of kagami,, i mean,, for no reason at all i just think this is a good idea”

she talks to nino and nino is like “ok i guess i can help tutor you but u have to actually make an effort and also stick to a schedule so youre not there when adriens there bc we are respecting his boundaries and also you need to-”

and chloe is like “great perfect done”

and then she actually does everything nino says

so basically

she ends up passing all of her classes and making friends

literally just because she is too stupid to actually try to talk to kagami

they literally do not have any conversations other than like “hey, whats up?” “nothing much lol” for like,,, an entire year

also chloe does not admit to herself that she has a crush on kagami for that entire time either

meanwhile adrien and nino and kagami are all a little confused bc chloe keeps flirting at nino??? and adrien is like “im pretty sure she likes girls but idk???” and nino keeps being like “hey chloe what’s up, i just got back from hanging out with my amazing girlfriend alya who i am very in love with,, and who is my girlfriend,, who i am dating”

and chloe has literally no idea why he is doing this but continues to flirt at him and subconciously hope that kagami will catch some of her flirting vibes and falls in love with her

so basically

they are all stupid

BUT Chloe and Nino do become actual friends and chloe actually respects him for the amazing wonderful smart talented kind person that he is and he helps her make some new friends and they get to the point where they are a super great study group and she’ll listen to all his homework assignments and proofread some of them when its like finals cramming time and they are supporting each other and their friendship is good

[gellavonhamster]

cold weapons

Suicide Squad (2016) || Captain Boomerang/Katana || post-canon

ao3 link eng || this was first written and published on ao3 in Russian in 2017 but I didn't attempt to translate it into English back then.  

“So, what do you think of them?” Colonel Flag asks.

Tatsu puts the folder containing the rap sheet of Waylon Jones, better known as Killer Croc, on top of three other folders.

“They’re complicated,” she replies after giving it some thought.

The materials in these folders could have formed her first impression about the members of Task Force X – or, as Lawton has aptly put it, the Suicide Squad. Could have, but did not, because they were given their first task earlier than expected. Which is why she doesn’t say “villains” or “scoundrels” or “worst team imaginable” – her first impression of them was formed in combat, and then in an empty bar in Midway City where they all drank together thinking it may be the last drink in their lives. She remembers all of this and says ‘complicated’.  

“Very tactful of you,” the colonel chuckles. Then again, what kind of colonel is he now – an unwashed shirt, black circles under the eyes. Just another guy struggling with a deluge of work, a hard-hearted boss, and a troubled relationship with his girlfriend. “But yeah, they definitely aren’t simple,” continues Rick Flag, one of her few friends in the country that will never become her home, and Tatsu cannot suppress a tired smile.  

“You like them.”

“They’re… tolerable,” Rick admits, and takes another sip of coffee. Lately he seems to be living only on coffee and whiskey and the verb “must” and (so Tatsu supposes, although they don’t talk about that) the hope that June Moone, who still hasn’t fully recovered from all the horrors she’s been through, will be all right – and will stop isolating herself and avoiding him. These means for not letting yourself just fall down and never get up are far from being reliable, but Tatsu herself lives mostly on revenge and duty and, for that matter, whiskey as well, to a certain degree, so it’s not for her to judge. “Most of them, at least. All of them minus the Australian.”

“At least he’s a good fighter,” Tatsu points out. This is the only good thing she can say about Captain Boomerang with full confidence.  

“He’s not cut out for teamwork.”

“When we were fighting the Enchantress, it didn’t look to me like that.”

She does not put much meaning into these words. It’s just that at some point Captain Boomerang saved her, and she saved him – and good thing they’re even, because the last thing she needs is to owe a favour to someone so incompatible with the very concept of duty. She could have said much about the man who tried to escape at the very beginning of the mission and got a teammate killed (and for some reason stood up for El Diablo when Harley Quinn lashed out at him at the bar, and for some reason came back before the battle after trying to desert), but the only thing she’s sure of is that he’s a fine weapon; she can confirm that, being a weapon herself. At the end of the day, that is all that’s required from him.      

At the end of the day, that is all that’s required from her, too.

 ***

 It is possible that what she said about Digger Harkness sticks in Rick’s memory, because when the need to comb the area arises during the next mission, he sends the two of them to search through the same building.

“If he gets up to something, do whatever you want to him. No one’s gonna weep for him,” he flings off. This is in the heat of the moment, of course – Boomerang almost got into a fight with Killer Croc on the helicopter over some nonsense. Or rather, it was Croc that almost got into a fight with Boomerang after the latter provoked him. Complicated.  

“You heard that, darl?” Boomerang addresses her with a smile so wide as if he hasn’t heard the last remark. “I’m all yours.”

Tatsu looks the other way and pointedly takes her sword out of its sheath – not completely, just a little. No further comments follow, and they part company – Deadshot with Croc, Flag with his team of spec ops, Tatsu with Boomerang – and go on a recce.  

In the basement, they discover something that looks like a laboratory – if a place so far from being sanitary may even be called one. All their hopes to move without making a sound crumble as soon as they enter the room: the floor is covered with broken glass. Those who ran the place must have escaped in haste and couldn’t take the entire stock of the serum with them, so they opted to destroy most of it. Tatsu’s attention is immediately drawn to the object on the table in the middle of the room – a metal container with tubes going from it to several smaller vessels. She heads straight for the table, shards crunching underfoot. Boomerang follows her, apparently kicking the largest shards on purpose so that they fly in all directions.      

“Looks like a hooch still,” he comments, having come closer, and gives a whistle. “Whoa, fuck, is that blood?”

Compared to the first task of their squad, this one looks almost effortless. Two gangs, the members of one of which possess the formula of the serum that grants superpowers to those who take it. A gun battle, collateral damage, the entire district on lockdown. If a few people weren’t noticed literally floating through the sky, the police would have been handling this. But this is an emergency, which is why they’re here, and the flying gangsters aren’t flying anymore, for Lawton is an exceptionally good shot.    

As it turns out, the serum that sparked the conflict is based on metahuman blood – hardly donated voluntarily.

“I’ll contact Colonel Flag,” says Tatsu, eyes locked on the bloodied tubes, and then someone grabs her by the neck.

For the first time in her life, she really has to fight blindly – because her enemy is invisible.  

Later, when the dead bodies gradually become visible on the floor like an eerie animated movie, it turns out there were four of them. Before that, Tatsu manages to lose her sword, recapture it, almost choke when an invisible hand squeezes her neck, slash one of the attackers in half, and plunge the blade into another’s stomach. Boomerang takes care of the other two, knocking over the container in the process.    

Tatsu is listening to the silence that came after the fight, wondering if any other invisible foes are lurking around the corner, when she feels that something is wrong. Something is wrong with her – she just can't figure out what. Sometimes it happens that one feels unwell but cannot determine what exactly the problem is – she is experiencing something similar now. Until she realizes: the mask. Until she looks up and makes eye contact with Captain Boomerang, who is staring at her and grinning.  

“You lost anything, doll?” Harkness inquires innocently, with an emphasis on the last word, and his smile grows even wider and cockier.  

Shit. Shit, shit, shit. The invisible man she fought hand to hand tore off her mask, and she didn’t even notice. But her partner, blast him, did – and picked it up.  

“Give it back,” Tatsu demands, hand outstretched. She feels naked. In combat, during the mission, she is Katana, a single whole with her sword. A cold weapon. No one needs to see her face. Truly, if she was wearing only the mask and nothing else, she would have felt less exposed – all right, this is an overstatement, and she doesn’t even want to imagine such a situation. Meanwhile, Boomerang is in no hurry to return the mask.      

“What did ya call me when that fucker was about to stab me?” he asks. Tatsu clenches the sword hilt. There is no telling how many enemies drunk on the magic serum are hiding in this house, and he’s dawdling. “You said…”

Damn it, what did she say? She saw one of the invisibles creeping up on him while he was fighting another – a bloodstain was floating through the air. She shouted…

“I said ‘George’”. Isn’t your name George Harkness?”

“You bet it is. It’s just weird. Most people don’t call me George, y’know.”  

“How do they call you then?”

“Digger. Boomerang. Boomer. That Prick. All sorts of things, but never George. But you,” he winks, “can call me whatever ya want. I liked the way you say my name.”

“Give. Me. The mask.”

“And the magic word?”

“I will chop your hand off,” as a proof of her intentions, she puts the blade against his extended hand that is holding her mask. In fact, she would face no consequences for doing so. No one’s gonna weep for him.      

Harkness makes a helpless gesture and hands her the mask.

“Can’t say no to you, luv.”

The mask helps her conceal her identity, but what is more important is that it helps her conceal needless emotions. Tatsu really hopes that her facial expression isn’t giving away that she’s ill at ease now. This is a weakness; weaknesses are not to be demonstrated. She feels deeply relieved when she puts the mask back on.  

“Let’s get out of here,” she commands, turns around, and heads for the exit. Harkness trails behind.

“It ain’t fair, by the way. You know my real name, but I don’t know yours,” he muses. “Care to introduce yourself, eh?”  

He asks the same question at least three times more before they return to Belle Reve, and each time she ignores him.

 ***

 A week later, he still doesn’t know her name – but he learns something else.

They do away with the last members of the recent gang on the outskirts of the city. Both wretches have overused the unfortunate serum, in keeping with the best traditions of the clichéd movies about superheroes and supervillains that Hollywood keeps producing for some reason, even though it is more and more often possible to see nearly the same thing on the news. As a result, one of them got puffed up almost to the size of the creature that Superman died fighting, and the other couldn’t control the flames bursting from his mouth. He burned half of the shopping centre with customers, retail workers, and guards. With teenagers in the bowling alley on the second floor and children in the playroom on the first.    

Santana… wouldn’t have approved.

Both problems eliminated, they leave: the firefighters and the cops will take it from here. Flag’s spec ops stay behind, because officially it is their victory; the general public shouldn’t know about the existence of Task Force X. Through backyards, they retreat in the direction of the abandoned construction site on the other side of the street; a car has been sent to pick them up there.  

There is a workers’ trailer still standing by the construction pit. The door is not locked, and Rick, Deadshot, Croc, and Boomerang go inside. Jones’s arm is broken: his inhuman strength notwithstanding, he still was no match for his enemy – not the fire-breather, but the other one. Tatsu leaves them to figure out how to make a temporary sling, and wanders away. Not far from the trailer, a piece of tarpaulin stretched over the fence has come off, and she can see the building across the street. Tatsu sits down on the ground, puts her arms around her knees, and stares at the dandelions growing by the fence.  

In her head, flames are raging.

She doesn’t look up, neither when she hears the footsteps approaching, nor when Harkness – and it is him, no one else in the Squad reeks of the mixture of booze and cologne like that – sits down next to her and cracks open a can of beer.  

“You want some?” he nudges her. What extraordinary generosity. It is, however, perfectly possible that if she says yes, he’ll reply along the lines of “Well, then go and buy yourself some.”  

“No,” Tatsu replies without looking and, after a short pause, adds, “Thank you.”

“Are you sure?”

With a sigh, she accepts the can from his hands, and takes a sip.

“This is disgusting,” she whispers, and takes another.  

Harkness just snorts and opens another one. For a little while, they sit side by side in silence, drinking each from their own can, and study the wall opposite through the mesh of the fence – like out of a prison window. Old advertisements that are half torn off, graffiti, a writing proclaiming that life fucks us all – plenty of things to stare at to avoid looking the person next to you in the eye.  

“So what the hell happened to ya?” Boomerang asks, and suddenly she could do with some serum for invisibility or, better yet, disappearing completely. Naturally, it is a fleeting impulse; she has no right to disappear. She has obligations – towards Flag, towards Waller. Towards herself.    

“Nothing.”

“Nothing? You zoned out, Flag shouted himself hoarse before you heard him. Like you were someplace else. Didn’t ya?”  

Why do you need to know? Tatsu thinks. If she almost rushed headlong into the fire, it’s her own business. If it only seemed to her that someone was there, it’s her own business. If she’s going to see things that aren’t there for the rest of her life, it’s her own business. He shouldn't have spoken. There is something comforting about being silent together.    

“Nah, you don’t have to say if you don’t wanna,” Boomerang assents, and takes another pull on his can. “I just thought that you, well. Might wanna talk to someone.”  

And they fall silent again. Yet now Tatsu feels awkward, which makes her angry at herself. She’s not obliged to pour out her heart to anyone who shows something that looks like care.    

This silence doesn’t make it any easier.

“I have… bad memories,” she finally says. Now it won’t be as awkward: she answered his question. It won’t be, right? “About a fire”.

Harkness nods, looking at her attentively.

“Someone you knew died, aye?”

“My children,” she hears herself say, and wishes to disappear again.

“Fuck,” Boomerang says, embarrassed, and – unbelievable – looks like he actually feels bad about starting this conversation. “I’m sorry, I… well, uh, I had no idea.”  

“It’s okay,” Tatsu says mechanically. Nothing is okay: she can still see Yuki’s tear-stained face, still hear Reiko’s voice, she is still watching the flames run up the curtains that she and Maseo picked together, she is still breathing in the smoke and still cannot believe she deserves a gulp of fresh air. She should have saved them. All of them.  

Boomerang looks at her incredulously but doesn’t say anything, and bit by bit, the silence that she doesn’t want to run from returns – the kind of silence in which one is not alone.    

Then there are footsteps again, and Flag approaches them.

“There you are,” he says with relief as soon as he sees her. Rick does not let himself overstep the limits of formality – they’re on a mission, after all – but he has obviously been worried. At the sight of Harkness, he frowns warily. “You! Quit getting on her nerves.”

“Who’s gettin’ on her nerves, Colonel? I was just tryin’ to help,” Harkness protests. It appears Rick’s words have wounded him a little.  

“He was,” Tatsu says. “It’s all under control, Colonel Flag.”  

Flag shifts his gaze to her and then to Boomerang again, and nods.

“Okay. In any case… follow me. We’re leaving.”

Tatsu gives her unfinished beer to Boomerang.

“Don’t talk about this to anyone,” she tells him. This might be an order or a request; she doesn’t really know.

He nods, and she thinks absentmindedly: who would have thought this man knows how to make a solemn face.

“Thank you,” she says again, hoping that he understands that this is not just about the beer or his promise to keep his mouth shut.

***

 After a few days, Tatsu comes to visit him. In prison.

Actually, she comes to visit all of them, of course. Not more than fifteen minutes alone with each of them – Waller wouldn’t allow more. This request seems to have surprised her, but Tatsu is certain that Waller is already picturing the new threads she can use to manipulate her special operations puppets. So it is possible that one day this decision will blow up in Tatsu’s face – or in the faces of all of them. But she cannot shake off the feeling that she must do this – so that someone except Rick, who is already dealing with a lot these days, would notice in time if the inmates are treated with undeserved cruelty. So that she knows what’s on their minds, because it is safer to fight side by side with the people whose line of thought she can understand at least roughly. So that there is some kind of variety in their lives between the missions.  

This is why she visits all three of them. Killer Croc, who looks like he’s not surprised to see her in the slightest and doesn’t really seems to care that she came, but doesn’t have any issue with that either. Deadshot, who looks like he is surprised, but doesn’t seem to mind answering her questions when she notices a stack of letters in the corner and asks him how his daughter is doing. And Captain Boomerang, who, when she enters his cell, looks like he can’t figure out if he’s dreaming.

“Katana?” he frowns perplexedly. He’s stripped to his waist, so she can see a couple of fresh scars he brought back from the last mission, and he’s got a black eye – when Tatsu saw him last, he had not. Must have quarrelled with the guards again. “What are you doing here?”  

“I came to see you.”

For a moment he seems not to understand what she just said. Then he breaks into a smile – or rather a grin, wide and pleased. Very pleased.  

“Aha! Knew it would end up like this,” he pronounces in triumph.

“Like this?”

“You,” he looks like he’s just proven a theorem of immense complexity, “missed me.”  

“I haven’t missed you, Captain.”

A very, very pleased grin.

“And still you’re here.”

“I visited Deadshot and Killer Croc earlier,” Tatsu says, and sees his facial expression change instantly. Not for long: the grin is quick to return, and she wouldn’t be able to tell right away that he’s disappointed.    

“Did ya now? And how are our fellas doing? Better than me, I reckon?”

“So it would seem. Did you fight the guards?”

“Why do you care, gorgeous?”

Indeed, why does she? Most likely, he picked a fight himself – and got his just deserts.  

“Make up your mind,” Tatsu says, “if you think that I missed you or that I don’t care.”

Harkness chuckles and really seems to ponder over this for a while.

“Beats me,” he concludes at last. “Care to throw some light on it?”  

No, Tatsu thinks, I don’t get it myself and I’m not sure I want to.

Instead of answering, she comes closer to him – so close that she can smell his sweat – and studies his face. She has to look up to be able to do that, which must look comical. Then again, he’s hardly stupid enough to laugh at her height or anything else about her, especially when she’s armed and he is not.  

“You lost a tooth. What happened?”

“Didn’t get along with one of the Wall’s watchdogs.”

“You could have tried not to look for trouble for a change,” all of a sudden, Tatsu realizes that she’s mad. Really mad at him. They might get dragged to another mission this instant; whether they like it or not, they have to be in good enough shape to protect the society that the most of them have to atone before at least partially. They shouldn’t spend their energy and health on nonsense. Black eyes and knocked-out teeth are nothing, but it mustn’t come to any of them being out of action when all of them are needed. All their powers, all their skills. All the anger they should rather aim at something other than the people who can just press a certain button at any point – and dispose of the wilful weapon.

Boomerang bares his teeth – not like Croc, of course, but still threateningly. He looks dangerous now – big, sturdy, more than a head taller than her. But he still isn’t more dangerous than her – and both of them are aware of that.  

“And they could have tried,” he speaks through his teeth, “not to talk shit about my mother for a change. They wanna talk shit about me, they can knock themselves out. I’ve heard enough ‘bout myself, I don’t give a flying fuck about what else they gonna say. But they’d better leave my mother out of it.”

So that’s what it is. They have found a quick and easy way to infuriate the man who has “MUM” tattooed on his chest. In uneven letters, like a child's handwriting. Tatsu noticed that tattoo as soon as she came in but didn’t look too closely at it. Now she feels like she has the right to look, to let her gaze slip lower, at the ridiculous writing that heaves with each furious breath of his, and then to avert her eyes at once.    

“They have power, and you have nothing,” she says. “Do you enjoy being their plaything?”

“Oh, so I’m a plaything, darl? And do I have much choice who to be now? In these four walls, and,” Boomerang points at his neck, at the place where a bomb is implanted under his skin, “with this crap in my neck?”  

Tatsu looks up again, right him in the eye.

“You already know who you are,” she tells him. “You’re a weapon. Broken weapons get discarded. And you’re letting them break you.”  

He stays silent, just looks at her in an odd manner, as if she’s speaking another language but he has a vague understanding of what she’s saying and doesn’t like what he just heard – because it is the truth.

Tatsu still doesn’t understand why she cares, and with each passing minute she has less and less desire to learn why.  

“Also,” she continues, “if you call me ‘darl’ or ‘gorgeous’ one more time, you’re going to regret opening your mouth.”

“Yeah? And how should I call ya?”

“Katana.”

“What, and that’s all? Nah, we might be weapons,” and she probably ought to remind him that there is no ‘we’, but in this particular case he’s right. Perhaps that is why Tatsu feels drawn to all of them: they’re cut from the same cloth, “but we’re alive as well. So far. Seriously, what’s yer real name? You know mine.”  

“I should not disclose that.”  

“Oh, come on. Listen,” he breaks into a pleased grin again. Another theorem proven. “How about a deal? You tell me yer name, and I will try to keep my temper if anyone else decides to stir me up. What do ya think?”    

“As if you’re going to keep your word.”

Boomerang makes a show of putting his hand over his heart.

“For you, ma’am… anything.”

For you. All at once, she recalls Rick’s words: do whatever you want to him. How many minutes of the visit she has already spent on this predictably fruitless conversation?    

“My name is Tatsu Yamashiro,” she says, tired, and then he smiles – not the way he did before, but in a calmer and more sincere manner. Gratefully.

“George Harkness,” he offers her his hand with an earnest air. “Nice to meet ya.”  

Tatsu hesitantly offers him hers. Her hand looks very small and fragile against his huge paw, and he must be thinking the same because the handshake comes out very careful. He could easily break her wrist. She could easily kill him with one hand afterwards. But he holds her hand gently in his warm, pleasantly calloused palm, and Tatsu hastens to take her hand away, because this is a mistake of an even worse kind than the time he saw her without the mask.  

“So you promise not to fights the guards.”

“I promise to try,” Harkness assures, but he’s keeping one hand behind his back.

“Don’t cross your fingers,” Tatsu says sternly. Real mature.

With a sigh, Boomerang repeats his promise, this time holding his hands within her view.

“But I ain’t promisin’ not to call you gorgeous,” he declares in the end.

“You know my name now.”

“But you’re still gorgeous.”

“Time’s up!” shouts the guard outside the door, and Tatsu cannot help feeling relieved that she has to go. She doesn’t regret visiting him, but all of this is too strange and awkward, and both of them might be weapons, but her position is different from his, and it is better not to forget that.    

“Can I do anything for you?” she asks him on parting.  

“Well,” Boomerang smirks. “I don’t even know where to begin.”

“With something I would actually agree to do?”

“Come again. Will ya?” This time he isn’t flirting; this time she can feel his insecurity, even shyness. As if he doesn’t like to admit to himself that what she answers is really important to him.  

“I’ll try,” she says cautiously. She’s not going to make any promises: she asked Waller about one time only. She doubts if she’ll be allowed to visit them again – to visit him again.  

“Try,” Harkness repeats, as if weighing the word on his tongue. “This means no.”

“This means I’ll try,” Tatsu says firmly.

And she comes again in a week. And the week after next. And a week after that.  

 ***

 “Why didn’t you walk away in Midway City?” Tatsu asks him once. “When Rick broke the control panel. You left then; why did you return?”  

A lot of water has flowed under the bridge since the time Captain Boomerang dared to smart off Amanda Waller. Several successful missions, slightly more respectful attitude on his part – and his cell already bears a passing resemblance to a place for living, even if for living quite miserably. Now there is even a table, and a chair that she gets to sit on as guest privilege. Harkness is sitting on the floor opposite her. The question seems to catch him unawares, but only for a moment.    

“Huh? Why did I return? Gotta live up to my name, that’s why. Have you ever thrown a boomerang, luv?”

I’m going to throw you somewhere one day, Tatsu thinks, yet without much irritation.

“And jokes aside?”

Boomerang attempts to feign an offended sigh.

“How do ya think? Plenty of options, all right. You gonna try to guess which one?”

Tatsu frowns.

“Is this a psychoanalysis session? Were you bitten by Harley Quinn?”

“Nah, Blondie didn’t bite me, I would’ve remembered. So don’t be jealous,” his voice gets playful again, and Tatsu stifles the urge to roll her eyes. “Lookie here… suppose I suddenly realized that I can’t leave you guys! ‘Cause you’re my mates. One for all, and so on. Don’t believe me?”

“You said something about plenty of options. What are the rest of them?”

He scratches his chin thoughtfully.

“We-e-ell… the second, ‘course, is that I wanted to save the world. Not that the world smiles upon me every bloody day, but I still wanna live! And for everyone an’ their mother to know that the bastards like us can also be heroes. Don’t you like being one of the good guys, eh, Tatsu?”

“I’m not ‘one of the good guys’”, Tatsu protests. “And it’s not me that we’re talking about. Any other options?”

“There was no point in leaving. That was still gonna be the end of the world, aye? So I’d rather meet it in battle and in good company than on the run. All the same it’ll be the end. There you go.”  

He stops talking, and in the silence that falls Tatsu can hear the footsteps of the guards in the corridor. Once again she wonders what the duty attendants that monitor everything through the surveillance cameras think of their conversations. They must make for the strangest and most pointless reality show ever.  

“The third one,” she says.

Boomerang looks a bit disappointed.

“Why?”

“Not the first one, because none of us meant anything to you then. You had just met us. And it didn’t seem like you were upset about letting Slipknot down,” Tatsu explains. She doesn’t intend to offend him – she’s just saying the truth. Once, he claimed it himself that they understand each other – here’s some understanding, he’s welcome. “Not the second one either, because you’re not stupid – no, stop smiling. You never believed that if people like us stop the Enchantress, someone would learn about that. Only the third option remains.”  

Harkness nods slowly.

“Yeah,” he agrees, and his eyes turn pensive, abstracted, as if he is there again, in the night city frozen in anticipation of the apocalypse. As if he sees himself – and makes a choice once again. “And that’s what happened in the end, didn’t it?”

“So the third option, then?”

“So it is.”

But something in his face makes Tatsu think that he was hoping for a different answer.

***

 Time flies; weeks and months go by. Tatsu spends them fighting, spilling someone else’s blood, occasionally drinking with Flag at a bar or in his apartment – a bachelor’s home again; reading books – most of the plots seem too naïve and unimaginative compared to what goes on in her life, and that is even for the best, and visiting the members of the Suicide Squad in Belle Reve. Some people go clubbing Friday evenings, and she goes to prison Friday afternoons.  

“Don’t get attached to them,” Rick scolds her.

“That is rich coming from you,” Tatsu replies, and he has enough self-awareness not to argue. Lest he gets offended, she chooses not to tell him that sometimes she and Lawton talk a little about him good-naturedly behind his back.

During one of her visits, Harkness raises a topic she has totally forgotten about.

“Hey, come to think of it, we never had that drink,” he points out. Tatsu doesn’t understand what he’s talking about, and it must be written all over her face, because he continues. “Remember I asked you out for a drink? In Midway City, before we fought the witch.”  

Tatsu has to make an effort to remember: indeed, he said something of the sort, but it never occurred to her to take those words seriously.

“We had a drink,” she counters. “When… when you shared your beer with me.”  

He shakes his head, dissatisfied.

“At the construction site? That’s bollocks. I’m talking a proper bar… nah, a restaurant! With crystal glasses an’ candles an’ shit… Like normal people.”  

“Candles,” Tatsu mumbles. She tries to imagine the two of them at the table at a restaurant; the picture turns out pretty absurd. On the other hand, a lot of what has happened in her life during the past few years can be deemed absurd.

“Yeah. Candles,” echoes Harkness, and continues with a crooked smile, “well, that’s me jokin’ around. In the near future,” he gestures in the direction of the small barred window of his cell, “I won’t be able to take you even to a fucking McDonald’s.”  

They don’t talk about the hypothetical dinners at a restaurant anymore, but the absurd picture stays with Tatsu, who still feels somehow indebted to Boomerang – for no reason, as she keeps telling herself – for that conversation at the construction site. She doesn’t like to feel the weight of unpaid debts on her shoulders – yes, that’s what it is about.

One day, she finds a way to pay that debt back.

 ***

 She waits for him in the car outside the prison gate. She hears him first; she cannot make out what exactly he is yelling at the guards, but that surely isn’t ‘good evening’. Then the door of the jeep is open, and someone must have kicked him in the rear because he literally falls into the car. Tatsu shrinks back on instinct.  

Then Harkness looks up – and notices her.

“Katana?.. Hey, what the hell’s going on? They didn’t let me take the boomerangs, didn’t let me take anything…”

“Close the door,” Tatsu tells him, and when he, still confused, obeys, tells the driver, “Let’s go.”

The car pulls away.

“I still don’t get what’s happening,” Harkness reminds her. “Sure, I’m happy to see ya, but… you weren’t ordered to take me to the woods and finish me off under the radar, huh?”  

“If Waller wanted to get rid of you, she would have had you killed in your own cell, and that’s all.”

“Wow, thanks for honesty. So where are we going?”

“To a restaurant,” Tatsu says, and turns away. Yet again it crosses her mind that it is a terrible idea.

“A restaurant?” Harkness drawls quizzically.

“As far as I recall, you said that the beer at the construction site is ‘bollocks’.”  

She should turn back to him, of course. The problem is that Tatsu is ninety-nine per cent sure that if she meets his eye now, she will blush. And she is by no means going to give him any sign that might be interpreted as taking an interest… of a certain kind. She has already blundered more than a few times.  

Therefore she stubbornly keeps looking out of the window. Then again, she doesn’t even need to look to picture how his facial expression is changing now; she’s seen this rakish grin enough times.  

“Holy cow. Tatsu, are you serious? We’re really just going to a restaurant? We’re getting outta this shithole where they only give us porridge with rat crap to gorge ourselves on lobsters and drink wine? Oh, fuck me sideways,” in the end, she turns to him and sees him throw back his head and burst into laughter, narrowing his eyes happily. “I’ll be damned! Am I dreaming? I must be dreaming. Pinch me.”    

“I can assure you you’re not,” Tatsu says, and realizes that she is also starting to smile despite herself. She has visited him and the others in Belle Reve often enough to know that porridge with rat crap, unfortunately, is far from being just a figure of speech. After such a diet, a meal at a restaurant must seem like the pinnacle of happiness.    

Boomerang shakes his head, apparently still unable to believe her.

“Holy fucking shit. How did you do that? How do you even do all that? I’ve told ya you’re unreal, have I?”

“Yes, you have,” Tatsu confirms patiently. And more than once – too often for her to attach great importance to it, too fervently for it not to please her at all. “Let’s put it that way: this is Waller paying me for a… favour.”  

“A favour, then. I take it a lot of some poor suckers died?”

“No,” she shakes her head. And it is true – but there still was a lot of blood. Both the man Waller indicated and his bodyguards turned out to be worthy adversaries. The whole thing went not as smoothly as she wanted it to – not that she wanted to; not that she would kill another person she knows nothing about if she could help it. Nothing to assure her: this one deserves it. Everything turned out rather… nasty. She had to burn the bodies. Then she got home in a haze, tended to a couple of fresh wounds – or rather, just scratches. And then she went to the bathroom and spent a long time soaping herself, as if the invisible filth that bothered her the most could be washed off with shower gel.    

Afterwards, she rummaged through her modest wardrobe and dug out the only dress she has about in America. Nothing special: wine red, below the knee length, sleeveless but with a pretty high neckline – very demure. The first and so far the last dress she bought after… after. If she and Rick didn’t have to accompany Amanda Waller to some event once, she wouldn’t have bought this one either. She put it on, combed her hair, still wet after the shower, with her fingers, looked at herself in the mirror – and flew into a rage, pulled off the dress, and could barely stop herself from tearing it to shreds. Restaurant or not, what does it matter? The last thing she needs is for him to think she dressed up for him.      

So the situation might be a little less absurd than it could have been. Both of them look like they’re going on another mission with the others, only she isn’t wearing her mask – he has already seen her face anyway – and he isn’t wearing his ever-present coat. It is no wonder he wasn’t allowed to take it – Waller wasn’t going to let him out of Belle Reve armed, and to let him wear his coat would probably be as unwise as to hand him all his boomerangs. Tatsu has no doubt that everyone and their dog have already searched through the personal belongings of the Squad, but she wouldn’t be surprised to learn that somewhere in his inside pockets Harkness has as many boomerangs as he is listed as having officially. She witnessed this man produce from his bosom at least four different lighters, a massive stack of dollars, a pocket knife, small binoculars, flat-nose pliers, and a toy unicorn. She has to admit: sometimes she doesn’t understand how he even does all that either.    

It appears that the thoughts of Captain Boomerang also turn to the contents of his pockets.

“Hey, how the hell are we affording this, though? Make no mistake, I’d stand treat, but my stash is in the coat, and these assholes didn’t let me take it, y’know.”    

“Don’t worry about that. Waller is paying for everything,” she explains, unable to suppress a grin, because this part, possibly the most unbelievable part of the entire affair, gives her a sort of silly, spiteful joy. Task Force X is a comparatively recent project, but they’ve already cleaned up so much mess for Amanda Waller that Heracles and his labours don’t even come close. A dinner at a restaurant is the least thing she could offer them. So when Boomerang explodes with laughter and gives her a conspiratorial wink, she looks him right in the eye and smiles. Another mistake. Then again, this is not the first time they share a secret.

He puts his hand on her knee, and she shakes it off immediately; this is way too far.

“I see you took your sword with ya,” Harkness observes, not giving any sign that something didn’t go the way he wanted.

“I am to keep an eye on you.”

“Yeah. How about…” he leans in closer, and the smell of cologne blasts up Tatsu’s nose. She can only hope it is due to external use only, “we chop off his head,” he nods at the driver, “and drive the fuck away from this? Huh?”    

The driver, who can definitely hear everything, doesn’t turn, but Tatsu notices him tense up.

“You’re kidding,” she says dryly. He may be, or he may be not – with Digger Harkness, one cannot always tell.

“Why kidding, doll? Zip, and done. There’s no way you enjoy working for Waller.”  

“I do not. But if you pull some stunt,” Tatsu feels for the sword hilt, and Boomerang sees that – very well, it is good for him to see that, “I will chop your head off. I really hope it won’t come to that.”  

“And what’s it to you? Scared of me? But I’m unarmed,” he claps himself on the chest demonstratively, implying that he has no weapons on him. “Why do you care if it does?”  

“I just wouldn’t like to do that,” she says firmly, and it’s true. It works well; he doesn’t even mention running away for the remainder of the day.

 This might be the strangest evening in her life.

Waller’s man drives them to a French restaurant whose name she cannot read but is almost sure that the phrase was chosen solely because it sounds impressive. They are let in through the back door, so no one among the other guests, who are sporting evening dresses and suits, pays any attention to her crop top and sword or to his… appearance in general. Their table is one of those located in alcoves, away from prying eyes, but Tatsu feels they are being watched. Which means Waller doesn’t trust her too much – well, she can understand that. She is part of a special team composed of deranged madmen, and she must admit she likes these deranged madmen more than she likes certain normal people known to her. Of course, she is Flag’s right-hand woman, but it is most likely that Waller doesn’t trust Flag either. It is doubtful whether there are any people in this world that she trusts at all.          

Waller is rich. Their little feast will not shatter her wealth, all the more so since the restaurant she sent them to is not the most luxurious. But they still have a field day ordering loads of food and a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu.    

“To honour among thieves?” she suggests, when they raise their glasses for the first time.

“Didn’t ya say yer not a thief?”

“That is true,” she admits, and adds inwardly, I’m a killer.  

In the end, they drink to the Suicide Squad. Then to Lawton and Jones, currently languishing in their cells. Then to Zoe Lawton, who is acting in a school play next week. To a lot of things. He asks her about her life here, in America. At some point she finds herself trying to explain to him what taiyaki is, and him telling her about banana sandwiches, and she can’t remember why they started talking about this at all. The bottle becomes empty, and another appears as if by itself.      

They don’t talk about the past. They don’t talk about the future, because there might be no future at all – they can’t know for sure, what with their way of life. That evening, Tatsu laughs and thinks: good thing I’m drunk – it almost gets easier for a while.  

When it’s time to leave, Harkness gets pig-headed.

“Whoa, no, no, no. Already? It’s too early, are you kiddin’ me?” he booms out when they exit the restaurant. He protests, but she drags him by the hand and he stumbles along after all, treading heavily like a dancing bear. “Let’s go someplace else, luv. Look at the pretty stars.”  

“We are already late. And you… you have to go back to jail,” Tatsu tells him. The stars are pretty indeed, but she regrets looking up at them, because her head begins to spin. Thankfully, she isn’t wearing high heels. Thankfully, she doesn’t have any high-heeled shoes at all, or she could have been possessed to wear them. “Sorry,” she adds when they get into the car and set off. “There is no other way.”  

“Back to jail,” Boomerang repeats with disgust. Sprawling on the seat, he unzips his hoodie, and Tatsu is swept over by the smell of cologne again. Weirdly, it doesn’t annoy her as much as at the beginning of the evening. “I’m a fucking Cinderella. I’m not back by midnight, they turn me into a pumpkin.”  

“Cinderella,” Tatsu echoes, and giggles: everything is way funnier now. The driver makes a sudden turn, and she is literally thrown at Boomerang. Her cheek presses to his chest – and stays there. Tatsu feels drunk and sated and drunk again, and sleepy too, and he makes for a decent pillow, and she can’t make herself move away.  

“Oh, you think it’s funny,” Harkness mutters with mock offence in his voice. It seems he’s about to fall asleep too. “Well, go on, laugh.”

They drive back in silence, and through the drowse Tatsu feels the warm arm around her waist and thinks: good thing I’m drunk, I can pretend I’m asleep.  

The road to Belle Reve is long, but it still feels like they reach it too quickly.

“Inmate,” calls one of the guards, “get out.”  

Harkness, his eyes still closed, moans with discontent.

“Captain Boomerang,” Tatsu says softly, freeing herself from his embrace. “It’s time.”

There is nothing to be done. He’s already about to step out of the jeep, when he suddenly moves closer to her again.

“Hey, darlin’,” he says, looking her right in the eye. “Aren’t ya forgetting something?”

It takes her some time to realize what he means: he must be expecting her to kiss him. All at once she remembers everything that has happened this evening, and awful shame washes over her: it is no wonder he’s expecting that to happen.  

“Inmate, get out!”

She shrinks back.

“Good night, Captain,” she tells him as dryly as she can. He looks wounded but says nothing, and almost obediently lets the guards escort him back to his cell. Tatsu closes her eyes and rubs her temples wearily. Tomorrow she is going to regret drinking so much. She already does – and that’s not the only thing she regrets.

She has to stop seeing him.

 ***

 At first, she even succeeds. Next Friday Tatsu, as always, goes to Belle Reve to see the Squad – all of them save for Harkness. She feels sick at heart because if she did promise him anything, it was to visit him, and now she’s going back on her word because of her own stupid weakness. But there is no other way.  

“He asked about you,” Waylon tells her a week later, when she brings him the latest issue of Playboy. Tatsu almost doesn’t feel weird anymore when buying it, and doesn’t try to imagine anymore what the news stand clerks think when she pays them for it. Such periodicals cause her a feeling of light disgust, but Croc, who gets let out of jail only to be thrown into another trouble spot, deserves at least some small joys.  

“Who?”

Waylon, no doubt observant like all the quiet ones tend to be, bares his impressive teeth.  

“You know who.”

It seems a logical solution to give up on these visits at all – but in that case she would betray all of them. Perhaps this little tradition is much more important to her than it is to the prisoners, but Tatsu is almost sure that it means something to them as well. She has no right to deprive the rest of them of this bit of understanding, companionship, normalcy because she wasn’t smart enough to stop the game she and Boomerang started before it became too late.

At home – not that the apartment she’s renting here deserves to be called ‘home’ – she, unable to fall asleep, unsheathes the sword and runs the tips of her fingers along the cool blade. A tender, habitual movement – like touching the cheek of a loved one.

“I’ve lost my way, Maseo,” whispers Tatsu. The place where the souls of the people struck down by this blade are trapped is still a mystery to her, but she knows that Maseo will come as soon as she calls him – as a voice from afar, as nebulous shapes in the swirls of smoke, as the peace and safety granted by the presence of someone dear. “I’m afraid of my own heart.”    

I know your heart, Tatsu. You have nothing to be afraid of.

“It makes me act rashly. Makes me succumb to false feelings.”  

I know your heart, Tatsu, and it incapable of falsehood.  

Only the ones that are already far away can speak so vaguely and with such unrelenting honesty at the same time.  

“I will always love you,” she whispers ardently. Not because she doesn’t want him to think it is not so; not because she herself feels like it is not so anymore either. She knows for sure that she is always going to love him, for she loved him as a lover, as a husband, as the father of her children, as the only thing she had left after all her life fell apart, burned in that damned fire. He will stay in her heart until her last breath – even if she has to close her heart to the rest of the world. Once she used to think that after all she’s been through, it isn’t going to be an issue.

And I will always love you, her husband replies, and Tatsu blinks back tears with a deep sigh.

“I just wish you were alive,” she tells him for what must be the hundredth, or maybe a thousandth time.

If he was with her – not as smoke or a voice, but as flesh and blood – he probably would have kissed her gently on the nape of her neck, as he often used to do.  

I just wish, says her husband – no, the soul of her husband, which is already rushing away, deep into the world she shouldn’t hurry to go to if she doesn’t want this sword to fall into wrong hands, that you were happy.

***

 Literally the next day there is a message from Metropolis that some giant snake-like beast is terrorizing the city and devouring people. The monster was last seen crawling into the building of the opera – which is where their squad heads to after reaching the city.  

“Look at that freak,” Harkness comments in a low voice. The creature is curled up slumbering on stage, and they are watching it from the catwalks above. “Not a family of yours by any chance, eh, ‘gator?’    

Waylon steps towards him, and the planks creak under his feet, threatening to break.

“Say that again,” he growls.

Tatsu bares her sword and wedges herself between them. Waylon backs off reluctantly.

“Knock it off,” she tells Boomerang. It feels like everything has come full circle – the day Harkness picked up her mask, he also had a run-in with Jones. The day they were sent to fight the Enchantress, she also put the blade of her sword under his chin. Why did she even think something would change?

“Oh, so you’re talking to me after all?”

“Enough,” Tatsu hisses. She really wants to try to explain everything to him. Maybe if she tries to put her feelings into words, many things will become clear to her, too. But if he thinks they are going to discuss this now, he is mistaken.

On the neighbouring catwalk, Rick is looking at them in a rage, gesturing both of them to shut up. Harkness steps closer; now the blade of the Soultaker is within a hair’s breadth away from his neck. A single careless movement, and blood will be spilled. A wild idea crosses her mind: it looks as if he’s into this. Tatsu licks her lips.

“Y’know,” Boomerang begins, lowering his head a little so that it is easier for him to look her in the eye, “I think you’re scared of me. Or of yourself, hell if I know. Am I right?”  

A loud rustle comes from beneath, and the next instant the monster bites through the middle of the catwalk they’re standing on, and both of them are falling down. Tatsu manages to grab some rope, but when she tries to climb it, her hands slip, and she comes tumbling down.

The fall is far from being soft, even though she falls on the tatters of the curtain, which the snake must have torn earlier. She is lucky not to hurt her head, but her left leg and hip are aching. Only the awareness that there is no time to lie around makes her summon up all her strength and get up. Her sword is nowhere to be seen, and Tatsu is overwhelmed by fury: now she is useless.

The snake roars and shakes its head, trying to shake off Croc, who is trying to bite through its scales. Rick is shooting at the monster from above, and Deadshot, who is already on stage somehow, is doing the same from below, dodging the blows of its tail. Tatsu sweeps her eyes weakly over the stage and suddenly notices a hole broken in it. At the very edge of the hole, the hilt of her sword is sticking out of the floor. Moving as quickly as it is possible to do that with a limp, Tatsu hurries there.

The moment she pulls the sword out of the stage, Harkness’s head pokes out of the hole. Not waiting for him to ask for help, Tatsu helps him get out.

“Are you…” both of them begin in unison and drop it immediately, because the snake has managed to shake off the bothersome little crocodile – who is hopefully just somewhere on the floor and not in its belly – and is moving towards them, slower than before but still pretty speedily. They scatter, and Tatsu charges at the monster with her sword drawn. Harkness throws a boomerang at the creature, aiming at its eye, but it dodges at the last second.        

Eventually, with joint forces they manage to kill the beast. To be on the safe side, Lawton fires a round into its open jaws. The long body shudders one last time and falls still. For some time, the five of them stand there looking at it.

“Where could this thing even come from?” Rick mutters.

“Remember what the Wicked Witch of the West said when she tried to get us to join her? The world is changing, the time of magic has come, blah, blah, blah,” Lawton reminds him. Rick nods absentmindedly; these are not happy memories.

Jones kicks the dead snake.

“Maybe it meant no harm,” he points out in his deep voice.

“Croc,” Rick says wearily, “it ate people.”

“So did I.”

“But at least you didn’t chew the curtain at the opera like a disgraced diva?” Lawton asks, struggling not to grin.

“Nuh-uh.”

“Well, then it’s okay.”

Rick titters nervously, and the next instant all of them are shaking with laughter.

 Tatsu is drinking water straight from the tap in the restroom, when Harkness comes in.

“This is a ladies’ room,” she says reflexively.

“Hey, I just wanna wash my face, is all.”

Without waiting for her to answer, he comes closer and starts washing at the neighbouring sink. Tatsu casts a sidelong look at him and notices that the water is turning red.  

“Show me your face,” she orders.

“It’s not a bad face, what’s yer problem?”

“I’m serious.”

He rolls his eyes, but stands still while she examines his face, only wincing when she dabs at the cut on his forehead with a paper towel.

“Just a scratch,” he assures at once.

“Just a scratch,” Tatsu agrees. She scrunches up the towel and throws it into the sink. She would like to keep her hand on his face, pretending that she’s still wiping off the blood, but she’s done pretending.

“How about you?” Boomerang asks quietly.

“Fine. A couple of bruises. You were lucky today,” she says just as quietly, and takes off her mask. Tomorrow they might not be as lucky. “I’m happy for you.”

“And I’m happy you got out alive… darl.”

For a moment she wants him to ruin everything. To reply with a jibe, to crack another dirty joke, to try to grab and kiss her only to get smacked. Not to stand motionless in front of her like he’s afraid to scare her off. It occurred to her once that from the outside their relationship might look like an attempt to tame a wild animal. Perhaps this is a mutual process.

Do whatever you want to him.

She stands up on tiptoes and kisses him.

For an instant, Harkness freezes – possibly trying to figure out again if he’s dreaming – and then pulls her closer and kisses back. Drinks her hungrily, like this is both the first time and the last. Bearing in mind what their lives are like, it really might be the last.

Tatsu doesn’t immediately realize why she suddenly doesn’t need to stand on tiptoes anymore.

“Put me down–” she starts, but gives up and wraps her legs around his waist. Boomerang grunts with satisfaction and switches from her lips to her neck. His beard, fortunately, is softer than could have been expected.  

“Stop drinking so much,” Tatsu breathes out, now that no one is trying to shut her mouth. “You taste like…” all English words slip her mind, “like… a beer cask.”  

It tickles her when he laughs into her neck.

Someone simply must enter now – Rick, Floyd, Amanda Waller, the president of the United  States, but no, no one is trying to stop him from squeezing her hips, to stop her from running her fingers through his hair. Weapon to weapon, blade to blade. Red-hot metal to red-hot metal. Melting until something new is forged – without fear, without regret, without the past, without the future.

Clearly, Maseo wants too much: she remembers what happiness is, and she is sure she’ll never ever be happy again.

But she can take a shot at being alive.

[lixis-sin-cauldron]

Trapped [Eraser Head | Shouta Aizawa]

Rating: Explicit  18+ content MINORS DNI. Pairing: Shouta Aizawa (Eraser Head) X fem!original character Word Count: 2600~ Kinks and Warnings : dirty talk, coercion, hand job, vaginal penetration, Aizawa Shouta POV, two uses of pet name 'kitten', cheating, cucking, infidelity, inebriated sex, dubious consent 

Summary: Shouta helps Hizashi's girlfriend bring his friend home after a night of drinking. After getting the drunk DJ in bed, things become... complicated.

Can also be read on Ao3 here: Trapped Big thank you to my lovely beta readers @lilleeboi & @messwriting for the huge help they provided in making this as great as possible!

Shouta was trapped, her legs intertwined into his and arms locked around his neck. She had pulled him to the bed so suddenly, having not expected the attack she had him right where she wanted him.

“Stay,” she whined, nuzzling his neck.

Under normal circumstances, Shouta wouldn’t be opposed to a beautiful woman begging him to stay in her bed and arms. This, however, was not a normal circumstance because of the fact that the beautiful woman was drunk and was his best friend’s girlfriend.

“Shouta,” she pouted, her bottom lip quivering in a way that made him swallow, “It’s way too late. Just stay here and get some sleep.”

“I can sleep in the living room.”

“The bed is plenty big enough for all three of us,” she countered, causing the man’s eyes to flash to the blonde figure laying behind her. Hizashi was out cold, having drunk way more than he usually does. “Plus, it’s way more comfy, don’t you agree?” her words slightly slurred with a giggle as she cuddled him.

He wasn’t really paying attention to the bed or how comfortable it was, his mind trying its hardest not to think about how soft her thighs were or how great her ass looked when she had spontaneously stripped down to her lingerie after they had guided the drunk man to the bed.

“Comfy or not, I feel better-” the words got in his throat when she pulled him closer, the feel of her breasts pressing into his arm. His mind was screaming. He had accepted his attraction to the woman not long after Hizashi had introduced her after they had started dating, but this was not something he had ever expected to happen.

“Please?”

He made a decision, a plan. “Fine.” He stated dryly, “I’ll stay here.” He would just wait her out. She was already on the verge of passing out, only holding out to convince him. If he could just stay long enough to appease her, she would fall asleep shortly and he could easily slip from her hold.

A logical plan.

“Yay,” she purred, burying her face into his neck and holding him like a teddy bear.

‘Yay’ was not what came to mind at the feel of her breath on his skin, his body responding. Time seemed to crawl from that moment as she clung to him while he waited for a sign that she was sleeping. Her breath began to slow, indicating that she had drifted off, and he reached up to carefully pry her hands from him. However, she grumbled at his touch, tightening her grip instead.

“Sleep,” she mumbled in reply to his act of resistance.

Several failed attempts later, he was in a worse position than before, her thigh now pressed into the middle of his legs, rubbing against his already confused member. He held back a groan as she shifted against him. What god had he pissed off to suffer like this?

Her face had withdrawn from his neck, a small grace, and was now in view. He noted that some of her hair clung to her parted lips, the ends waving as she breathed. Against his better judgment, Shouta reached up and carefully brushed the hairs away. Yet again at the touch, she stirred, her eyes fluttering open briefly to look at him. She gave a sluggish smile, his heart fluttering at the sight.

She slid her hand to his chest and rubbing in a circle to try and comfort him into sleep. The action was brief, her hand slowing to a stop and resting where it was as she began to slip away.

He counted the seconds until he could expect her to be asleep again, but the count was interrupted when she made a noise.

“Hm?” she mumbled curiously, her hand now gliding downwards. He froze as she gripped his semi through the cloth of his pants, the feel of it against her leg had gotten her attention. She giggled, “Is this for me?”

“It just - ah—” his words cut as she started moving, massaging him. “Don’t…”

“You want me to stop?” she teased biting her lip and staring him down with a hungry gaze.

She had no right to look that hot while misbehaving. “Not your boyfriend, Sweetheart,” he reminded her, giving a strained smile.

“Mm, I know but… he’s asleep right now.” She released her hold, but his relief was short-lived as she trailed upwards to slide under his waistband. “Let’s see... You’d prefer skin to skin, right?”

His hand snapped up, grasping her wrist, her fingertips grazing his skin. “Don’t,” he snarled.

The warning only seemed to excite her more. “I’ve seen how you look at me,” She teased, “Do you really want me to believe you really don’t want this?”

“Appreciation of something doesn’t mean… plus you’re Hizashi’s—”

“No one owns me,” she growled, a primal look in her eyes. “Plus – I just want to help you relax… to sleep of course.” She added sweetly.

“Fucking tease.”

The retort was crude, but he was reaching his wit's end with the handsy woman so more rational replies were becoming a struggle. His building frustration at her touch was diverting his thoughts from his brain to lower regions. The primal and logical parts of his brain conflicting with each other as he tried to figure out how to deal with her properly.

“Is it a tease if I intend to do what I’m saying…? And Shouta,” Her face moved closer to his. “You haven’t moved my hand.” Her fingertips still rested under the edge of the waistband, “Just… move me and I’ll stop.”

He should have pulled her away, thrown her off even if it woke Hizashi, just left. She was drunk and his best friend’s girlfriend… but god did he want her.

She must have sensed the internal conflict and, as if to make up his mind,, sliding further down under the band of his pants and boxer-briefs, slipping from his grasp with no resistance. He let out a long exhale as her fingers ran through his pubic hair and to his base. Shifting him into a better position against his hip she began gently rotating her thumb around his head, using beads of precum to work him.

“Relax,” she mewed, pressing her forehead to his. Her own breath was starting to quicken in arousal as she watched him succumb to the pleasure.

“Mhm. Sure,” Shouta replied in a low rumble. As if he could relax like this. A furtive groan escaped him as she shifted her focus from his cockhead to run her fingers down his shaft, fingertips trailing up and down the throbbing vein that ran the underside of his length. She repeated this movement, tantalizing him but never encompassing him.

A low growl escaped him in annoyance at the torment, “Would you just…”

“Hm?” A playful, innocent tone in the sound, as if she was unaware of his discomfort.

“Fucking—” He grabbed the side of her head and pulled her into a kiss, thrusting his tongue inside and exploring. She gave a muffled moan as he did and her eyes had a glazed half-lidded stare as they broke, her chest heaving as if he had pulled all the air from her. “Stop. Teasing.” he commanded, no longer wanting to play her game.

“Oh…kay…” She replied breathily, following the order and taking hold of him fully. She began pumping him slowly while returning her thumb to massage his tip, much to his aggravated delight.

“I’d call you a good girl… but we both know that isn’t true.”

She gave a flushed giggle, enjoying his authoritative tone.

He shushed her, eyeing the still sleeping figure that shared the bed with them.

“He’s a heavy sleeper.” She whispered.

“I’m… aware,” Each word was a struggle as he enjoyed her touch. His pants started to feel tighter, so he hooked his thumb into the waist, sliding the pants down his hip. She worked in tandem, helping to expose the hardening cock to the air. As she stroked, he pulled her into another firm kiss.

“Feel good?” She inquired playfully as they pulled apart.

“Very,” He pressed his face into the crook of her neck, nipping and kissing at her skin.  Subdued moans threatened to escape her, already too loud for his liking so he took her free hand and used it to cover her mouth while he continued exploring her skin. He finally reached the curve of her breast, covered in the silky bra that had been taunting him all night.

Eagerly, he freed the object of his desire and drew the exposed nipple into his mouth. She jolted at the  action, but he held her still as he played. His tongue danced around the point, sucking at it. He retreated, blowing lightly and rolling a thumb over the hardening peak. He began suckling again, relishing the activity. Exploring further down with his hand, he slid under the fabric of her lingerie, and between the lips of her pussy, she twitched and gave muffled groans in reaction.

Just as he was appreciating how wet she was, Hizashi turned beside her, causing them both to pause. Panic set in as the man moved towards them in his sleep, throwing a limp arm over her in a loose embrace. Shouta’s heart pounded in his ears as he tried to figure out what to do.

She reacted first, uncovering her mouth, silently panting, and gently nudged the arm off. It fell with no resistance beside her, her boyfriend wiggled in response to the act and for a moment Shouta was sure he was going to wake up but instead the blonde rolled back and let out a minor snore.

They both took shaky breaths as they recovered from the scare.

“Shouta,” she whimpered, finally breaking the tension, beckoning him upwards. He did so eagerly, their lips locking together, the tip of his tongue tracing and sucking hers. The pace of her strokes slowed as she focused more on the kiss.

She broke the connection, taking shallow breaths and locking eyes with him. “Please.”

Withdrawing his hand, he took hold of her underwear and wrenched them down, taking all his control to not just tear the garment off completely. She moved with him, shifting her hips and lifting her leg as the cloth traveled. Once off, he grabbed her thigh and pulled her over his hip as he twisted himself into position between her legs.

She started to guide his cock, but he stopped her, moving her arm to rest around his neck.

“Stay quiet,” he growled. Biting her lip, she gave a stifled whine in agreement before burying her face into the crook of his arm still locked beneath her.

Guiding himself, he found her entrance eagerly waiting for him, warm and damp. He inched himself in slowly, taking all his self-control not to thrust as deep into her as he could. He hissed as her walls squeezed around him, his fingers digging into her hip, and his face buried into her neck to muffle the sound. He pulled her closer, shoving himself deeper as he did so.

“Oh god,” she muttered; the words were barely audible against his arm.

“You take me so fucking well,” he purred softly in her ear as he began slow thrusts in her, her body shivered in response to the words “Like the way I stretch your insides, Kitten?”

“Yesssss,” She hissed, growing steadily louder as his pace increased.

He shushed her, “Careful. As much as I want to hear your moans, we need to be quiet, remember?”

“Yes– ah – yes, Sir,” she whimpered, biting into the cloth of his shirt.

As he plunged deeper into her, her muffled cries increased and stimulated him to thrust harder in turn. After a particularly forceful thrust, she threw her head back in ecstasy, barely holding back a cry as her lips fought to stay pressed together to soften the noise. The bed began to shake hazardously as they moved, gently jostling the sleeping man beside her. Shouta’s heart pounded as his eyes settled on the shifting figure, not wanting Hizashi to wake up but also not wanting to stop his onslaught on the woman’s pussy.

“Fuck,” she sang, still getting louder as her pleasure intensified.

Pulling her into a kiss, he started rapidly thrusting into her, her howls muffled.

“Such a naughty girl, taking another man’s cock so perfectly. Clenching down on me like this, you’re close aren’t you?” He hummed against her lips as they broke, slowing himself as he spoke.

“Don’t stop, please.”

“That wasn’t an answer,” He slowed further, pulling out slightly.

“Yes, I’m so close.  Shouta, please,” She pulled him close with her legs, pushing him back into her.

He let out a sharp breath as she did, his own climax approaching. “Only if you say where you want me to finish,” he growled, fighting against her pull.

“Inside. Don’t pull out. I want you inside.”

Bad idea, bad fucking idea. He knew it and he didn’t care. “As you wish, Kitten.” He slammed back inside her repeatedly, no longer paying attention to the shaking their fucking caused to the bed. His only preventive being covering her mouth as she cried out his name and accompanying obscenities.

As she reached her peak her insides squeezed tightly around him, pushing him into his own orgasm. He shuddered as the relief washed through him, his hand falling from her face. A loud moan escaped her lips, causing him to freeze in fear at the sudden sound, almost thunderous in the room after all their muted noise.

Unfortunately, while the movements hadn’t been enough to wake him, the sudden cry had been.

Hizashi stirred beside them, sitting up and running a hand through his blonde tresses. As he stretched, he looked over at his sleeping companion, finally taking note of his friend still frozen locked in an embrace around her.

He studied the scene before him, his scarlet eyes blinking away whatever sleep was left in them. After what seemed like forever, he reached forward and grabbed her shoulder gently and pulled, tilting her towards him and planting a kiss on her lips.

“Having fun without me again?” he quipped drowsily.

“You were out cold, we got bored,” she mewed with a flushed look, still glowing from her climax.

Shouta relaxed and sighed, “Tried not to wake you.” He grinned at his friend.

“Uh-huh. Well, I’m getting some water. You two want anything before I come back and join in the fun?”

They both gave a negative and Hizashi strode off while working his hair back into a manageable bun. After a pause, she started to giggle and Shouta soon joined in with his own chuckle. “You and your damn games,” he snarled playfully, finally withdrawing from her.

“You love it.”

“Hm,” was his reply before he pushed her into the bed and into a deep kiss, “I don’t know how he handles you.”

“Mm, well maybe if you got your own girlfriend you could figure that out.”

“And miss out on playing with you?”

“Who says that should stop? I think a new friend is a great idea.”

“That—”

“Yo! Make room!” Hizashi cried out as he ran back in and dive-bombed onto the bed. “My turn!” he sang, pulling her into his own kiss.

Shouta just rolled his eyes at the couple he had gotten tangled up with.

------Tag List ------ (Please let me know if you would like to be included!) @thisisthehardestthing​ @cheeriecherry​

[lovelylogans]

honey, you’re familiar (like my mirror)

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chapter three: psycellic consentia

psycellic consentia: psycellium (or psycelium) is a psychic nervous system that allows sensates to connect with one another. sensates have a solitary "above" existence, and are connected "below" via the psycelium. consentia, latin: knowledge shared with others, being in the know or privy to, joint knowledge; complicity; knowledge within oneself, consciousness, feeling.

ROMAN

It hasn’t even been five minutes since Sasha left to grab dinner, but Roman’s already feeling strangely jittery.

A nap would be a fruitless venture, he’s realized, so he’s gotten up to pace around the room, reciting the lines of the scene he’s meant to be filming tomorrow. He knows them all by heart, naturally, but it’ll be an odd scene to shoot anyways. His character, Pablo, would be escaping from the grasp of his friend-turned-betrayer (who would turn out to have been bluffing and truly Pablo’s friend all along by the end of the movie) by sprinting through the forest, making his getaway by leaping into a river and swimming away.

This stunt he doesn’t get to do; he’s already technically filmed the scenes when he’s in the water, and a stunt double will be “jumping off the cliff.” So tomorrow is going to be entirely on-location, acting then sprinting through the forest.

So Roman chants his lines to himself, pacing in his room with his eyes closed, trying his hardest to sink into Pablo’s mindset. And, after a few minutes of running his lines over in his head, it’s like he’s actually walking in the forest; the snap of a twig under his feet, the smell of leaves and dirt, the cooing of various birds.

Roman’s jaw drops, because—because no way. No way.

No fucking way is his brother standing there, with a bundle of twigs tucked up under his arms, staring at Roman the way a kid would stare at a particularly adventurous snail journeying along the ground.

Well, the way Remus would look at an adventurous snail, as a kid. Roman would have probably just fled the snail in favor of playing with wooden swords and rescuing imaginary damsels.

"Aw, c’mon, man, what the fuck," Remus grumbles, looking skyward as if asking for some kind of divine intervention, though Roman knows that's never been the case, much to their chronically Catholic abuela’s dismay.

She probably would have been pleased if Roman tacked on a God rest her soul there, but considering her abysmal reaction when her grandson decided to be an actor and an even worse reaction when her other grandson informed them all that he was, in fact, a grandson, he's never really wanted to please her anyway.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Remus says tightly, dropping his bundle of twigs. 

Remus. Remus is here. Or Roman is there? Whatever, it doesn’t matter, there he is. That’s Roman’s brother.

“What, are you trying to lure me in for the police to catch me? Because it’s not going to fucking work, Roman.” 

God, he’s alive, he doesn’t look hurt, he’s—well, actually, Roman has no idea if he’s safe or not. He just kind of looks like he’s dirty, with scraggly hair and smudges on his face. This alone isn’t entirely unusual for Remus, but the amount of it is. But—he’s here. He’s alive. He has some form of shelter, he’s probably been eating, he’s okay—

“Or are you just here to—”

Roman staggers forward and flings his arms around Remus’ neck, hugging him as tight as he can, almost as if he can feel what Remus feels, the arms wrapping around his neck and the arms wrapping around his torso in kind, feeling echoes of what he does, and what Remus does, bouncing between like a seismic shock.

Across the world, Janus smiles in his sleep; Emile wiggles happily in his chair while waiting for his next therapy session; Patton grins at a wall about nothing in particular; Logan touches his own shoulders, blinking rapidly in surprise at the weight of phantom arms holding him close.

REMY

Remy is used to experiencing emotions that aren’t his.

When he feels a near-violent joy sprouting up in his chest, he pauses briefly in pouring a customer a cup of coffee to put a hand on his chest and smile to himself.

He’ll ask Emile what’s got him so happy later. He’s just happy that Emile is happy.

REMUS

Remus blinks at Roman after Roman pulls back from the hug, hands on his shoulders, still beaming at him.

“—For a while I thought that you were coming to stay at my apartment with me, but then you never showed, and I was worried sick wondering where you were all this time. I’ve been reading all about the case—oh, that doesn’t matter now, we’re together! Now you can come here to the city, and I can post your bail so you can stay with me, and I can get you a really good lawyer, and—!”

“You’ve been reading about the case?” Remus says, his voice sounding strange even to his own ears.

Roman blinks at him. “Yeah?” There’s an unspoken duh in his tone.

“So you know that I’m the main suspect,” Remus prompts.

“Yeah…”

“So, you,” Remus says, “acting sweetheart of the nation with your dear fake girlfriend—you want to bring in a dirty gremlin accused of murder? The sibling the whole country doesn’t even know you have?” 

Roman looks suddenly anxious, as if expecting Remus to blow up and yell at him.

“Do you even think I’m innocent?” Remus continues, only faking his bluster a little.

“I mean,” Roman says. “It doesn’t really matter to me.”

“Does what matter?” Remus says. The bluster is much more faked this time.

“I mean, you’re my brother,” Roman says. “I don’t really care if you killed him or not.” 

Remus bursts out laughing.

Roman gawks at him, caught off guard, and Remus doesn’t know if it’s just from seeing Roman again, or the fact that he’s been on the run for over a week now and has only been eating the plants a hallucination taught him about, or what, but the expression on his face is just too good.

Roman! Who regularly gets caught in the tabloids! Getting a snapshot of him escorting a man wanted for murder into his warm, loving home! The mental image of the shocked expression on any pap’s face is just—oh, it would be so perfect.

“And your ‘girlfriend?’” Remus says, using air quotes. “Does she know about me?”

“No, but,” Roman says, still with that stupidly heroic, determined look on his face. “I’ll tell her. I’ll tell her tonight, even. She’ll understand.”

Right. If anyone else was as much of a media darling, it was Roman’s fake girlfriend, with her big, brown, innocent eyes and absolute inability to seem like she’s used to being famous.

“Oh, that’s too good,” Remus chortles. “Yeah, Roman. Okay. Sure. You go ahead and tell her.”

“I’m gonna!”

“Sure, fine,” Remus says, waving him off. “Make arrangements to bring your murderous brother home. I’ll catch a bus or something, I’m sure no cop is gonna see me and arrest me on the way to your apartment.” 

“I will,” Roman says, firm and resolute, and Remus just shakes his head, grinning still.

Of the pair of them, people seemed to think Remus was the crazy one when it was clear that Roman was absolutely bonkers. But at least he’d grown a pretty good sense of humor since Remus had been accused of killing someone.

JANUS

“Fucking finally, Jazza.”

Janus considers getting up and walking right back out, but unfortunately, his stomach is already set on fish and chips with the made-in-house sauce here. He wearily begins to weigh the costs of putting up with Key and the nickname “Jazza” against the benefits of sriracha aioli. 

And money. The money ends up winning out every time.

Three more jobs, Janus tells himself. Just three more jobs, and then you don’t have to put up with the risk anymore. Two, if one of them has a bigger compensation than average, and for the quality of my work...

It’s a lie, of course. Janus has been telling himself three more jobs ever since he clawed his way onto the bar standards board, years ago.

“What’s been going on with you, anyway?” Key says around a mouthful of chips, which garbles his speech beyond recognition. Unfortunately, Janus has known Key long enough that he can translate it with ease.

“Chew with your mouth closed and clean up your face,” Janus says, unable to stop himself. Habits are difficult to kill, Janus supposes.

Key rolls his eyes but obligingly blots at his face with a napkin. “D’you got it?”

Janus offers a small box wrapped like a present in answer. Inside is a hard drive containing the information their client had requested.

Key takes it, grinning, and stuffs it into his hoodie pocket.

“Be careful with that,” Janus scolds.

“You say that every time,” Key says. “Have I ever lost one of your—”

Janus glares at him.

“—one of the fruits of your labor?” Key says, quickly back-pedaling, realizing they’re in a public setting and a waitress is fast approaching with Janus's order.

“This smells amazing.”

Janus tries his best not to startle, but even with two days to process what the man in his mirror had told him, it’s still bizarre.

The actor beside him looks briefly embarrassed as if he hadn’t meant to say that aloud. Janus glances over at him—a member of his cluster, what an unappealing word—and sees a glimpse of a cramped little trailer. On a movie set, probably? He’s wearing leather pants and a leopard-print shirt that Janus has the feeling he’d never wear in real life.

Janus also feels the grumbling in Roman’s stomach. Janus sighs to himself.

“And another basket of chips with extras of that same sauce, please.”

“You got it, lovey,” she says, turning to go.

“Extra hungry, then?” Key says.

“Something like that,” Janus says neutrally. Without asking for Janus's permission—maybe knowing Janus was about to offer anyway—Roman reaches out and gulps deeply from Janus's Ribena.

“How’s,” Janus says, briefly casts about in his mind for the name of the latest love of Key’s life, and lands on, “Francesca?”

Key snorts. “Ancient history, mate.”

Not exactly surprising. Key’s always fancied himself a romantic, but he’s never been able to follow through on his commitment to anything ever.

“M’goin’ on a date with a bird tonight, though,” he says around a mouthful of chips.

“For God’s sake, Key, could you at least pretend you weren’t raised in a barn?” Janus snips at him, even as he’s dunking his own chips into the aioli.

Key grins at him, and Janus wrinkles his nose. He can tell Roman is doing the same beside him. They share the same sentiment at the moment, but it’s Roman’s “that’s disgusting” that falls out of his mouth.

He realizes why Key’s brow furrows a moment too late.

“Uh, bless you?” Key says; the closest he’s ever been to the Mexican vernacular of Spanish is ordering a fajita at a local Tex-Mex restaurant.

“Oops,” Roman says, not particularly apologetically. He grabs another handful of chips.

“I’m studying in my spare time,” he says and fixes Key with a look. “A hobby you could choose to emulate.”

“What’d I need more school for?” He scoffs. “Ten years was well enough.”

“To aspire for more for yourself—”

“Oh, here we go,” Key snaps, tossing down the piece of battered cod he was about to eat, splattering sauce on the wood table. “I am so sick of your “high and mighty” act.”

He mimics Janus's accent at high and mighty; Janus grits his teeth, and very purposefully enunciates his next few sentences.

“This cannot last forever, you understand.”

“No, just so long as you get rich off it, eh?”

“Um,” Roman says. “I’d offer to go and leave you two to duke this one out in private, but I’m not really sure how to stop this weird astral projection thing—”

Janus ignores him.

“Oh, as if being a lawyer doesn’t pay enough. Put your brain to some use and think, why is it that I keep helping you?!” Janus snaps, leaning across the table and softening his voice. “Why on earth do you think I continue with this?!”

“Spare me,” Key scoffs. 

“The only reason I keep doing this is because you keep doing this,” Janus hisses. “The only reason I became a lawyer was because of you getting us into trouble.”

“Don’t—” Key says, his face twisting up.

“It is because of me we are not rotting in jail, Quirinus. I’m sure it’s such a burden I want more for you.”

“It’s Key,” he grumbles before he rolls his eyes at Janus and tilts his baseball cap at him in farewell. “And since you have aspired to more for yourself, and since being a big fancy lawyer does pay so much, and since you saved me,” this is said with heavy sarcasm, “you fucking prat, you can get the bill. Much obliged, big brother.”

As he walks off, he tosses a “wanker” over his shoulder for good measure, jamming his orange cap onto his head.

Janus pinches the bridge of his nose, exhaling sharply.

There’s a pause. 

Then: the slurping of someone draining his Ribena.

Janus opens his eyes and turns his head to Roman, who’s chasing the last drops of Ribena about the glass with a straw.

“So, he’s probably not finishing that, right?” Roman says. Without waiting for an answer, he grabs a handful of chips and shoves them into his mouth. “‘Cause I’ve been waiting for Sasha to come back with dinner for like an hour now and I’m starving,” he says loudly while chewing.

Janus's jaw is slightly unhinged.

“You are a pestilence upon my life,” he says at last.

Roman smirks at him, mercifully close-mouthed, and swallows down the food that Janus supposes he’ll be paying for. Janus is certain that Roman is doing this to annoy him.

“Wait ‘till you have to deal with my brother.” He dunks the cod into the sauce. “Also, how much do you know about what’s going on here, anyway? Why do random people keep popping into my life?” 

Janus lowers his voice so they aren’t heard by any random passerby.

“Allegedly, we are known as sensates. I assume you’ve been seeing other people—we’re stuck seeing them psychically for the rest of our lives, as well as sharing specific skills, languages, emotions…”

Roman reaches for Key’s Ribena and drains that too.

“Tastes,” Janus adds pointedly. “That the other is paying for.”

“Yeah, exactly, you’re paying for it,” Roman says, and grabs another piece of cod. “It won’t go to waste now.”

“You won’t even get the nutritional benefits of eating food,” Janus says. “You’ll just get the taste of it.”

“Still, you’re getting your money’s worth. I’m helping.”

“Aren’t you rich?” Janus says. “Being an actor and all.”

“Aren’t you?” Roman counters. “Being a lawyer and all.”

Roman jams the cod into the ramekin of sauce.

“Either way, this place sure won’t take pesos, and it’s not like I can psychically transfer you money. Hey, how much do you know about Mexican law, anyways?” He takes a massive bite.

Janus puts his face into his hands for a few moments, before he reaches into his messenger pad and pulls out a legal pad and pen.

“Enough,” he says grudgingly—truthfully, not quite as much as English law. However, with this whole connection thing, they do share knowledge, so he certainly knows more now than he did before. He gestures at the waitress for another couple of Ribenas. “Why don’t you refresh me on the details of your brother’s case?”

PATTON

Patton frowns, tapping his pen against his chin as his kindergartners are all sprawled out on their mats for their post-lunch nap. He usually takes advantage of this time to catch up on marking (normally, just putting “good job!” stickers on their papers, they’re five) but right now he’s staring at something he’d written down out of the blue and trying to understand it.

He knows that he’s technically a sensate now, but does that mean his kindergartners are going to have to put up with scrawlings about Mexican flora when Patton had meant to be writing down the activities of the day?

“Aw, jeez,” someone grumbles, and Patton turns to look over his shoulder.

He grins sheepishly at the sight of an academic article plastered over with shiny star stickers. “Oops.”

The man is familiar and yet not; Patton doesn’t think he’s seen this one outside of briefly popping in and out. 

The man sighs, turning the paper over and then looking back at Patton.

“At least they’re purple,” he grumbles, and within a heartbeat, he’s gone. Patton returns his attention to his marking.

Oh, yay, he did end up putting stickers on the kiddos’ papers!

LOGAN

Not many people were particularly aware of this, especially considering the average population was generally unaware of the space research in Antarctica, but the cafeterias here are actually excellent.

In the history of Antarctic explorers and researchers, it had gone quite differently—Ernest Shackleton and Tom Crean ate seal, dog meat, and biscuits mixed with melted snow during the Trans-Antarctic Expedition of 1914—but chefs now seem to view it as an intriguing challenge, a way to sharpen their skills. 

Logan is an adequate enough cook, to the point where he can feed himself at home, but the food here is on another level. He’s finishing off his dessert, a lovely chocolate tart when a chef sits across from him at the dinner table, the same one that had served him his tray tonight.

He doesn’t know her well, so he hopes he’s disguised her squint at her nametag under the guise of adjusting his glasses.

“Very well done, Dot,” he says, lifting his fork to his mouth.

“Oh, good, you are one of us,” she says, with a level of relief that seems odd for hearing a compliment about her cooking. “I was wondering, Casimire gave me the oddest look when I told him to head off early so I could make eye contact with you.”

“What are you—?” Logan says, eyes narrowed, before his eyes flash to the kitchen, automatically looking for Casimire, the chef he’s most used to seeing.

True enough, Casimire isn’t there.

But Dot is here.

Dot is here twice.

Dot is sitting at the table with him. But Dot is smiling and chatting with one of the marine biology research team members, ten feet away. But—

“Oh, I can hear that brain working,” Dot says. She reaches out to pat his hand; it feels as warm and real as a hand can feel.

“What is this,” Logan forces through numb lips, appetite gone, chocolate tart entirely forgotten. “What are you—what is happening—?”

“Shh, shh, not too loud,” Dot says in a hushed voice. “To everyone else, it looks like you’re sitting alone. Here—you’ve got your bag with you, did you pack your earpiece?”

Logan nods.

“Put that in.”

He does as she says. What else is there to do?

The Dot in the kitchen turns to wink and smile at him reassuringly. He isn’t sure how to tell the Dot before him that there is absolutely nothing in this situation that could comfort him, and pointing out that there are two of her and that he is seeing things is not a particularly good way to go about it regardless.

He fumbles with the earpiece a few times, but he puts it in and clicks it on.

“There,” she says in satisfaction. “Now it’ll look like you’re talking over Bluetooth. Neat little trick, isn’t it? Keeps us from looking,” and she circles her ear with her finger and gives a two-note whistle, the universal sign for off your rocker. “I’m surprised your parent hasn’t taught you yet, but I suppose you are very new. Has your migraine stopped yet?”

Logan gawks at her. “How did you know I have a—?”

“Because I had one too when it all started,” she says. “All of us do. Let me tell you, I really wasn’t expecting to see a sensate down here, but I guess when you come to a place like this nothing should surprise you, right? That’s what my Larry said. But this’ll be handy, he was hoping I could meet a nice scientist to connect to the Archipelago! You’re an astronomer, right? That’s a very brainy subject.”

“Wait, go back,” Logan says. “How did you know I have a migraine? Why are you talking about my mother? Why should she have taught me about using Bluetooth? What does a group of islands have to do with anything, and what’s a sensate?”

The smile on Dot’s face slips.

“Oh dear,” she says. “Oh dear, you don’t know anything at all, do you?”

Logan gives her an offended look before he can really stop himself.

“Well,” Dot says thoughtfully. “A scientist. I bet you’d be really interested in the opportunity to send a question around the world within seconds, wouldn’t you?”

“Google exists,” Logan points out.

Dot smiles at him. “Where do you think they got the idea? Sapiens invented it in the 1990s; we’ve had it since the Neolithic.”

Against his better judgment to stop listening to what is most likely to be a hallucination, Logan finds himself very intrigued.

VIRGIL

Virgil is elbow-deep in papers about abrus precatorius, sorting them into piles for useful information or irrelevant when there’s the sound of someone hitting their knees beside him.

Virgil jumps, startled, and looks into the stunning blue eyes of Logan, the handsome Pole in Antarctica. His eyes are bright, eager, excited, and there’s a wide smile on his face.

“We’re not hallucinating,” he declares and spreads out an armful of his own notes; hastily taken, from the look of it, and he presses his fingers against an earpiece that’s blinking blue light. “Oh, and get one of these, by the way, technology has apparently made things much better for us, Dot said we’d get burned during the witch trials because we’d be talking to people who weren’t there and knowing things we shouldn’t know, but I think that’s an exaggeration. I wish there was a more central written history, but I suppose we’ve evolved in a way that word-of-mouth knowledge is the most efficient, haven’t we?”

There’s a lot of thoughts whirling around Virgil’s head—what do you mean, how do you know, why are we talking about witch burnings and evolution—but what comes out, a bit stupidly, is “You look good.”

Logan’s rambling stops in his tracks as he stares at Virgil, bemused, mouth slightly ajar.

“Um, I mean,” Virgil says. He coughs. “You look… less worried than last time. Which is. Good!” 

Logan keeps staring. With his lips parted like that, it’s all too easy to see that Logan must have licked them, recently; the sheen of it catches Virgil’s eye. He stares at Logan’s mouth. He stares at Logan.

Stop it stop it stop it he’ll think you’re weird, something in his brain shrieks, and that breaks the spell.

“So, uh, you’ve figured out what’s happening to us?” Virgil prompts.

Logan shakes himself, before he spreads out his papers, picking up one in particular. Virgil takes it, examining it; it’s two sketches of a brain. He’s familiar enough with biology by virtue of having doctors for parents to know that the sketch on the right side of the paper is not right. 

There’s something wrong with this brain.

“This,” Logan says, tapping the leftmost brain with his finger, “is the typical human brain.”

“Right, yeah,” Virgil says, frowning, and points to the rightmost brain. Their hands almost touch. “There’s something wrong with this one—something about the hemispheres, I think? It’s like there’s a growth.”

Logan moves to point to the rightmost brain, and this time, their hands do brush. But, before Virgil can think anything about it other than his hands are soft and he feels a little cold—

“This is what our brains are becoming.”

Virgil immediately panics.

“But it’s okay!” Logan says quickly as if he’s able to tell. Maybe he can—Virgil isn’t sure how clear it reads on his face. Or maybe, the way he’s been laughing at nothing or frowning at thin air, Logan can feel it. “It’s okay, it’s totally natural for us. For homo sapiens, no, but for homo sensorium—”

“Homo sensorium?” Virgil repeats, brow furrowed.

“It’s what we are,” Logan says. “Scientific name homo sensorium, colloquial name sensate.”

Sensate. Virgil hears the word, and something slips in place in his mind—it’s as if he’s heard that term before. It feels like breathing in a whiff of air and catching the scent of a sweet that sends your memory careening back to a time when you were seven and elbow-deep in dough with your grandmother. But it’s like he can’t quite fully grasp the memory. Something niggles just at the edge of it. It’s like his brain is trapped on the grandparent metaphor because he cannot stop thinking about his mother’s mother.

He sets the memory aside, for now; he’ll have time to think of it later.

Because, as Logan explains everything he’s learned so far, Virgil has absolutely zero chance of thinking about anything else. 

They spend most of the night talking about it. Even with all the bizarre aspects of what this new information brings, it’s easy to talk to Logan in a way that isn’t typical of Virgil speaking with other people. Virgil isn’t sure if that’s because they share this psychic connection, or if they’re both doctors, or if it’s some other connection.

“The way it was phrased is that we’re different types of human, but I don’t think we’re so different that it sets us apart from other people. From what I understand, the growth of our population is primarily due to epigenetic factors…”

Okay, so, primarily due to how behaviors and environments affect his genes. But what epigenetic factor triggered this in Virgil? Was this a dormant thing that could be triggered by ingesting some sort of chemical, or was it due to the way Virgil behaved? Had he done something in his life to cause all of this?

“A lot of the science is conjecture,” Logan warns, “and there was apparently some big corporation intent on doing medical experimentation on us ten or so years ago, but that’s mostly handled, you just have to be more careful about making eye contact with strangers in public…”

Oh, great, scientists hunted them down for medical experimentation so now he had to closely guard himself in any hospital! What a thrilling thing to hear for the son of two doctors!

“I’ve gathered that we can “share” certain skills or memories and that these things will become easier with practice. That’s why I could speak Xhosa and you Polish when we first met, it was the skill-sharing attribute, which could certainly come in handy for several reasons, but I also understand that we can visit each other at various times. There’s apparently a medicine you can take to block it, but it’s rather rare to come by, so unless you know a pharmacist willing to do some work under the table…”

That would almost definitely come to bite one of them in the ass at some point. What about privacy? Was he just doomed to have people from all over the world pop in on him while he’s in the shower or something?

“Dot said that she met her husband Larry through the connection, which drove off into a whole side-tangent. Apparently, romantic partners in clusters—that’s the widely accepted term, ‘cluster.’” 

Virgil pulls a face.

“I know, they could have picked literally any other more appealing word for it, couldn’t they? Bunch, group, flock, clique, assemblance—Anyways, romantic partnerships within clusters are somewhat common, and most of the sensate community finds it quite normal. I think our parent is in one, or at least that’s what Dot said.”

Logan clears his throat and adjusts his glasses. “Apparently some of the old-fashioned sensates think it’s like—what was it Dot’s parent said?—”the worst sort of narcissism.” Apparently, her parent was very displeased to be a parent and wanted nothing to do with creating bonds. I personally think that’s a rather backwards—humanity survives and thrives due to its ability to create bonds and care for each other—but I suppose I tend to think that way about a lot of old-fashioned things.”

“I guess I do, too,” Virgil muses aloud.

They sit quietly, for a while, so quietly that Virgil doesn’t notice when Logan slips away; the only thing that does bring him back from his swirling thoughts is when a voice breaks Virgil’s silence. It sends the emotions of knowing what’s happening to him shattering to the ground.

“Who on earth are you talking to?”

[perfeggso]

I don’t want a lot (Johnny x Reader)

I wrote this as part of @suh-insane’s walking in a winter wonderland collab, so thanks to her for hosting! Happy holidays and I hope y’all enjoy ❄️☺️

Genre: domestic fluff

Characters: Johnny, fem! reader, Ten

Warnings: nothing really just mentions of bad things that have happened this year lol. It’s a very...2020 fic. Also I guess some language. Also, smoking pot.

Rating: teen and up

Length: 3.5k

My movie quote is “They can’t evict you on Christmas! Then you’d be ho-ho-homeless!”

December 18th 2020, 4:37 p.m.

“Knock, knock!” You pound your fist against the wooden door in front of you, then pull your coat tighter around you. You’d moved to Chicago five years ago for college, and you’re still not sure if you’ll ever adjust to the snowy winter months. It was at said college that you met,

“Johnny Suh!” You bang a fist on the door three more times. “I know you’re in there. Take your headphones off, you dumbass.”

You’re about to pull your phone out of your pocket and go to the trouble of removing a glove to text your boyfriend when you hear the door unlock from the inside, a metallic tumbling sound.

When the door opens all the way, Johnny is standing just past the threshold of his apartment, his catlike lips curled up at the edges. He’s wearing grey sweatpants and a blue flannel, and his freshly dyed blond hair falls to where his headphones rest around the base of his neck. You can hear Nirvana coming from them because you are dating a stereotype.

Johnny leans his large frame against the side of the door where he had been holding it and smirks, but there’s nothing but softness behind the expression.

“Long time no see, sicko,” he teases.

You roll your eyes as he moves to let you pass into the entryway of his and Ten’s shoebox dwelling.

“You look even more like a deadbeat than you did a month ago,” you say, not moving because your clothing is starting to drip melting snow onto the floor and you don’t even know where to begin with taking it off. “This is proof you need me around taking care of you.”

Johnny pushes off the door and closes it, pausing his music. He crowds close and starts unwrapping your scarf so you don’t have to think about it anymore, shakes some of the slush off it so it pools at your feet, and hangs it on the coat rack. He does the same with your puffer jacket.

“Aw,” he pouts, “you don’t like the new color?” He tries to remove your beanie too, but it was part of your Outfit, so you yank it back down onto your head and give Johnny puppy dog eyes, choosing to ignore the way your heart rate picks up a little from the proximity. Hey, isolation was rough, okay? Johnny tucks your hair behind your ears instead.

“No, baby,” you say, starting to toe off your snow boots. “I love it. It’s very Disney prince, but simultaneously very… Kurt Cobain.” Johnny smiles and lets you finish stripping your winter gear, walking his way back towards his sofa until he’s sitting, legs wide. Snow falls in flurries past the window behind him. “It’s just that, I dunno, you look like you’ve been spending more time on Reddit or something.” Johnny sulks jokingly at your ribbing as you hang up your purse and try not to fixate on how cold the indoor air still is. “I can tell you haven’t gotten laid in a while,” you continue. “Oh wait! I forgot you have Ten around for that.”

Now it’s Johnny who’s rolling his eyes, but he doesn’t seem too offended because he beckons you over to sit with him. You follow his gesture, skipping towards him until you can curl into his side on the couch. He removes his headphones and lays his head against the crown of yours, taking your hand softly.

“It’s not my fault my girlfriend abandoned me for a month,” he complains, rubbing his thumb over yours.

This makes you chuckle. Oh, how you’ve missed him. “If that’s what you call ‘considerately protecting you from the Novel Coronavirus’,” you joke, “then I guess, but I refuse to apologize for doing my civic duty.”

Your case hadn’t been bad, but it was a logistical nightmare. You’d spent two weeks in total isolation, nursing a cough, guzzling hard alcohol straight to see if you could taste it, sending your best friend out to shop for you, and thanking your lucky stars for having a job that would let you work from home. You’d spent the next two waiting to test negative for the virus and a positive for antibodies. Johnny was initially distraught when you told him, sending you cloying messages and calling everyday to see if your symptoms were getting better or worse. Once you’d convinced him you weren’t dying though, he went back to his usual obnoxious self, joking about planning your funeral and accusing you of faking it to avoid him.

Johnny pulls you tighter into his side. “Whatever,” he concedes. “Is it safe to kiss you yet?”

You look up at him and shrug. “Nothing’s 100% but…”

That’s all the reassurance he needs to pull you into his lap and connect your lips. It's soft and languid, and you hold each other through it. His arms are so solid around your waist it simultaneously makes your heart flutter and makes you feel like you could relax and take a nap right here and now. When you pull away, Johnny runs his hands along your figure, as if to reassure himself you’re really there. The smile he gives you glows, but only for a moment. You curl yourself into the crook of his neck and place the back of your hand on his cheek, tender. His skin there scratches yours just the tiniest bit.

“I missed you,” he says, chuckling.

“Mm-hm, I missed you too,” you reply. “How are you, anyway? You said you had something to tell me?”

“Oh, yeah,” he says. He maneuvers you off his lap to sit by his side, and from this angle you can truly tell that he’s going sheepish. Suddenly it feels like there’s an alien hand in your stomach. What could this possibly be about? Johnny’s nervous silence gets your brain spinning – a zoetrope of stupidity. Am I being broken up with? No – obviously not. Does he have a family member dying of COVID? I fucking hope not; that’d be complicated on multiple levels. Maybe it’s good? Maybe he finally got a job offer but he has to move away or something.

Johnny starts talking before your mind can come up with any other ridiculous hypotheses.

“We’re getting evicted.”

You furrow your brow. Had you misheard him? You shake your head, incredulous. Johnny and Ten had always maintained a good relationship with their landlord. It didn’t make sense for everything to turn on a dime, even if they were struggling financially.

“You’re kidding,” is all you manage to say.

Johnny just purses his lips and raises his eyebrows as if to say, “it is what it is.”

What he really says is that he wishes he was kidding, but he’s not.

“Oh my god,” you respond, crossing your arms in irritation at, well, at everything lately. “Fuck! When is this happening?”

Johnny sighs. “Technically in a week.”

You feel the cogs of your post-COVID brain start to crank against each other. A week from today would be…hold on,

“Wait,” you say, as the situation starts to appear more and more ridiculous. “Like exactly a week from today? Like on Christmas? You’re being evicted on literal Christmas?” You’re trying really hard not to raise your voice, even if it’s clear that if you did, it would be out of indignation on Johnny’s behalf. You’re obviously not upset with him.

Johnny’s eyes roll around in their sockets as if this is the first time he’s contemplated the exact timing.

“Well, yeah, I guess a week from today is Christmas…”

The absurdity of this all is getting to you, and you can’t help it, you start to laugh. It’s that kind of nihilistic, fuck-all laughter that’s been one of the few things getting you through this year.

“They can’t evict you on Christmas!” you quote. “Then you’d be ho-ho-homeless!”

Johnny looks at you blankly for a second, so you contort your face into that open expression universally recognized as the “get it?” face.

“From Go?” You hint. “C’mon, Johnny boy.”

And before his nickname can fully escape your mouth, your boyfriend is cutting you off with a long sound of recognition and doubling over his lap in giggles.

“Good one,” he says into his right knee, and you giggle along with him. “Wholly inappropriate, but clever nonetheless.”

“Why, thank you,” you say, enjoying the levity, but unable to uproot the feeling of dread in your gut at Johnny’s conundrum.

Go is one of you and Johnny’s favorite movies to watch around Christmastime, mostly because it’s only tangentially related to Christmas, it’s kitschy and ridiculous, and has a plot that is 90% crime. You’re surprised he didn’t catch the reference more quickly, but to his credit, he has more pressing worries taking up mental space.

“Where is Ten, anyway?” you ask, looking around performatively at the messy and claustrophobic room. A silver plastic Christmas tree twinkles on a table in the corner. “Have you two talked about a plan yet?”

“He’s grocery shopping,” Johnny explains. “He’ll be home soon. And yeah, we have an idea.”

“You do? Because you could always move in with me.”

Johnny scrunches his face up. “I would love to live with you.” Your heart rattles a little in excitement, even though you know there will be a ‘but.’ Johnny goes on, “but you know both of us wouldn’t fit in your apartment. Where would Ten sleep? Or put his stuff? We’d all be on top of each other.”

You nod, defeated because you know he’s right.

“Hey,” Johnny says, “but we can always have the ‘moving in’ conversation again, okay?”

“Okay,” you say, grabbing his hand. “Sounds good.”

It suddenly feels very dark in the apartment (it’s still chilly enough you think you might be able to see your breath, but you aren’t about to complain because you know there’s a very good reason for that), so Johnny pushes himself up off the couch to turn on a couple of lamps.

“So,” he says, facing you from across the room, “we’re gonna be evicted on Christmas, no matter what the cinematographic masterpiece that is Go tells us is right or wrong. Christmas is just as much of a capitalist construction as our rent, after all.”

You’re about to pipe up again about how fucked that is and how surely they can come to some sort of agreement with the landlord, but Johnny anticipates this and keeps talking.

“We tried to argue, babe, but as I know you know, we don’t exactly have much of a leg to stand on.”

Johnny is right. Again. How many months behind were they on rent at this point? They’d gotten a few months delayed back in spring, but they still owed everything that built up from that before the end of the year, and they’d blown through their stimulus check a long time ago. Johnny has tried to find work, but the theater business hasn’t exactly been booming. Ten, for his part, is able to make a bit of money doing freelance illustration and teaching dance classes over Zoom from his room, but his studio’s engagement has dropped since March and he still unfortunately gets paid per student. You can’t help wanting to punch a wall in frustration at how unfair this all is, but it’s not like any of it comes as a shock. You’re not naïve. You and Johnny met at a leftist theory club for Christ’s sake.

“We’re helping organize a rent strike,” Johnny says, calming you down. Finally, a glimmer of hope. “We’re not the only ones in the building going through it right now, and we know a lot of the tenants who aren’t being evicted well enough we can convince them to join.”

Right then, the front door flies open and thwacks a startled Johnny in the back.

“I’m home!” Ten calls from behind a sack of groceries. You can’t even see his face yet. “I’m terribly sorry,” he directs at Johnny, then heaves the bag of food onto the kitchen counter which is also sort of in the middle of the living room.

“Ooh,” he coos when he sees you, still sat on the couch. “The missus is back!” He strips himself of his winter coat, ignoring your scoffing and revealing an oversized red and white striped sweater. He shimmies against the cool air and lets out a sort of squeal. “I was not built for this actual winter shit.”

“Hi, Ten,” you say once he finishes his theatrics. “Missed you.”

Ten shoots a sappy pout your way. “I miss you too. I’m so glad you’re feeling better! You have no idea how morose Johnny got without you constantly around. Can I give you a hug?”

You nod and try to warm up Ten’s tiny frame with yours while Johnny mutters something about Ten not knowing what “morose” means. When you break away, Johnny is rifling through the week’s haul to put things away.

“I see you didn’t go off-brand for the ramen,” Johnny remarks, stacking several Shin bowls in the cupboard. He turns to Ten with a raised brow. “Big spender.”

“They didn’t have anything else but if you would answer your damn phone I could have called and asked you about it.”

“I answer my phone,” Johnny grumbles, stowing some orange juice away in the fridge.

“Besides,” Ten continues, ignoring his roommate, “since I’m the only one making any money in this household I figured I’d give myself some discretion for spending it.”

Johnny grimaces, and you figure this is where you should probably step in.

“We were just talking about the rent strike, Ten. Johnny was filling me in.”

Ten turns his attention back to you, letting Johnny house the food items in peace.

“We’ll see how it goes,” says Ten, looking out the window just past your shoulder, “but I’m letting myself hope a little bit. As far as I’m concerned, they’ll be kicking my corpse out of here before they put me on the streets.”

Johnny scoffs. “Always so dramatic.”

“Says the former theater major.”

“Touché.”

You’d missed the ‘old married couple’ dynamic your boyfriend has with his roommate.

“But really, just, please try not to get the cops involved,” you plead. “I don’t want anyone getting hurt.”

“We’ll see what we can do,” says Johnny as he closes the last cabinet and crinkles the brown paper bag up for storage.

Ten shrugs. “No promises.”

You sigh.

Once everything is good and settled a few moments later, Ten decides the apartment needs a more festive atmosphere, so that’s how you end up getting dragged down the short hallway to Johnny’s room while Ten belts Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You” from the living room and accuses Johnny of being a scrooge. Even still, Johnny sways playfully from side to side as he walks backwards, shimmying his shoulders and mouthing the words with a smile between protestations that this is “not how I envisioned finally spending time again with my girlfriend!” The way he buries his hands into the sleeves of his flannel to make sweater paws makes your heart so full you want to curl up and die. But, moving on.

Once in his bedroom, Johnny flicks on a warm-hued lamp and watches fondly as you collapse on the bed.

“I really did miss you guys,” you say for what feels like the hundredth time in an hour.

Johnny’s lips press into a little smile. “Yeah. We missed you. A lot. Especially me – you have no idea.”

You laugh sardonically. “Based on your text messages, I think I actually do have an idea.”

Johnny flops down on top of you, crushing you a bit.

“Oh really?” he asks, raising an eyebrow. His golden hair is falling in your face and it tickles, but Johnny halts any laughter with a kiss, then dots tiny kisses all over your cheeks and nose. They tickle too.

“You wanna smoke?”

“Sure.”

Johnny has a pre-rolled joint on his bedside table, and you watch him light it, feeling like you’re in a snow globe with the fall of snowflakes outside. The sky is that weird greyish off-yellow that only comes with a snowy night.

After a couple of hits, Johnny lies back down next to you and hands you the joint. The smoke brings you that usual tight feeling, like your lungs are shrinking but at the same time swimming in radiant heat. You don’t know if you should technically be doing this right after COVID, but you’re young and your body is resilient; you figure you’ll be fine. Besides, you can already feel the pleasant lightness setting in around your mind. It’s a placebo at this point, no doubt, but the relaxed anticipation is nice. You take note of the fact that Johnny had started playing music while you were thinking about lungs. The Strokes’ “Under Control” is doing battle with Ten’s Christmas tunes still seeping in through the cracks in the door.

You hand Johnny his joint back and roll onto your side, supporting your head with one hand and curling the other into Johnny’s abundant hair.

“I just want to say one more time,” you begin, “if worse comes to worst, you can always move in with me.”

Johnny takes another hit and holds it for a second, leaving you in anticipation.

“I know,” he says simply. “But I really think this’ll work. I have to, right? Besides, if Ten had to hear us fucking multiple times a week we would all start to regret living together. That, I can promise.”

You laugh, burying your increasingly silly-feeling head into Johnny’s chest. “Okay, fair.”

There’s stillness for a few beats where you just count your and Johnny’s breaths, trying to synch them up. This doesn’t work though, since Johnny’s lungs are bigger. Then,

“There’s no way your parents would lend you some money?” Your voice comes out quiet. “Or let you stay with them for a while?”

Johnny looks down at you, letting out a heavy sigh. “No, no. That wouldn’t be a good idea for…so many reasons. Besides, they don’t exactly have an extra few months worth of Chicago rent lying around either.”

You nod against Johnny’s chest. “I figured,” you say. “Just checking.”

Johnny brushes his fingers through your hair and kisses your part. “I appreciate your concern,” he says, offering a slightly sly smile.

You kiss the white fabric of his undershirt. It’s been so long since the two of you just laid together, and it feels better than you could have hoped, Johnny’s body heat helping to alleviate some of the cold of an apartment gradually losing its utilities. You wish you could get closer than chest to chest. You kind of wish you could burrow into him, but not in a weird way, you know?

“I believe in you guys,” you say. “However I can help, I will.”

“Thanks.”

Apparently, Johnny is done with talking, because he pulls you in for a warm kiss. Then, he gets the brilliant idea to shotgun the pot smoke. This activity quickly devolves into a very giggly makeout session, only to be interrupted by Ten’s voice outside the door.

“I’m opening the door in five seconds, you guys,” he says, “and if Johnny’s dick is out when I get in there, I’m evicting both of you myself!”

You and Johnny fall together laughing as Ten cautiously cracks the door. He swats at the air in disapproval.

“Stinks…” he remarks. “Oh, thank god you’re decent. Anyway, John, if the lady is staying for the evening, you both need to come help cook dinner, because I am not your housemaid, even if I do look good in a maid costume. Chop-chop.”

It takes way too long to get up out of bed because Ten, as usual, has made both you and Johnny absolutely lose it. Eventually, you manage to rise, but Johnny pulls you quickly back against his lap.

“Hey!”

“Just a minute.” He presses one last kiss under your left ear. “I love you.”

You can feel your skin tingle, although it might just be the weed. Either way, you’ll never tire of hearing that. “I love you too, Johnny.”

“I think Mariah was right,” Johnny whispers, voice displaying mock awe as if he were coming to a mind blowing realization. “All I want for Christmas is you.”

You give him a sympathy chuckle because that was kind of cute, in a corny way, and Johnny just swats your ass a little in response to get you back up to standing.

“Well, you and some basic shelter would be ideal,” Johnny deadpans. “I don’t think that’s too much to ask but I guess we’ll see.” You smile sympathetically. This strike is no doubt going to make for a stressful week, but you’re glad it’s starting like this.

“Hey, love birds!” Ten hollers from the kitchen.

“C’mon,” you say with a laugh. “Let’s not leave him waiting any longer.”

[miraculousholder]

We Belong Together ~ Chapter 1

Hey! Just wanted to say that I finally posted my second Miraculous Ladybug fanfic and I am so excited for you all to read it! Will be updated on here and on AO3 :)

We Belong Together - AO3

Summary: It has been years since Marinette Dupain-Cheng last saw Adrien Agreste when he broke her heart. Since then she has moved on and continues to pursue her dreams in becoming a renowned fashion designer. Adrien hasn't forgotten the girl who had stolen his heart, but never got the chance to see her after graduation. But when he decides to secretly have a career in singing and has an underground band, that's when he spots Marinette. The girl who got away in the crowd. Can they both see what went wrong in the past to make it right? Or will they ignore their feelings and completely move on?

Marinette Dupain-Cheng sighs in relief when she finished up her sketches for her senior project. While she still had to make the garnet, it was much easier than designing it. Putting it all together was the fun and best part.

She checks her phone, realizing she had a few missed texts from her friends and one missed call from Alya. Checking the time, Alya should be out from her own class so she decided to call back her best friend.

After a few rings, Alya answered. “Hey girl! By time you answered one of us.”

Marinette chuckles. “Sorry about that. I finally came up with a great concept for my senior project and I had to finish it before the ideas left my head. But I’m finally done with the first part.”

“Oh great! So we’re going out tonight?”

“I did not say that!”

“Girl come on! We’re seniors in college and not once do I ever recall you going out to the clubs or getting drinks with us. While I respect you for committing to the internships and your classes, it’s high time you let loose and have some fun. You won’t be twenty one forever you know?”

Marinette knew that her best friend was right. Her goal was to always become a fashion designer and while she loved what she did, it was definitely time consuming. It was a miracle she even still had friends who understood her busy schedule and made their plans based on her availability.

“I mean, I don’t have classes tomorrow so I guess I can afford to stay up-“

“Yes!” Alya yells and Marinette jumped from her friends loud voice. “Okay, sorry! I’ll text you the details and wear something...with a rockstar vibe.”

“Rockstar vibe?” Marinette questioned. “Are we going to a Jagged Stone concert?”

“Oh you’ll see.” Is all Alya said before she hung up.

Marinette was confused but decided not to question it any further or else she would regret accepting the invitation.

XX

A few hours later, nightfall had fallen over Paris. Marinette ate some dinner since she knew that if Alya and the girls were coming over, there would be some pre-gaming happening before they left to whatever place they had in mind.

Her small pet dog, Tikki, laid comfortably on her Ladybug bed in the living room. Marinette walks over and leaves out a bowl of food for Tikki and refilled her water bowl as well. Tikki already ate but it was just in case she came home late and didn’t wake up on time the next morning to feed her dog.

The door bell rings and Tikki lifts up her head upon smelling familiar people nearby. Marinette puts her dirty dishes in the sink and walks over to open the door.

Alya, Juleka, Rose, and Mylene walk in. All of them wearing concert attire but matched it to their personalities.

“Wow you girls look great!” Marinette exclaims, closing the door.

“And you look good, Marinette.” Says Rose. “I love the jacket.”

“Oh this old thing?” She tugs on her jacket. “It’s just something I’ve had in high school.”

Alya walks over to Marinette’s secret stash of liquor, as Mylene plays with Tikki.

“How’s Ivan?” Marinette asked Mylene.

Mylene smiles when her boyfriends name was mentioned. “He’s doing great! You’ll actually see him tonight.”

“Oh? Is he going to meet us there?” Marinette wonders and before Mylene can reply, Alya hands her a shot glass and she walks over to join everyone by the counter.

Marinette chuckles. “Okay can one of you tell me what we’re doing tonight?”

“Underground concert,” says Alya and hands her a glass. “Nino told me about this band he has been producing songs for and he invited us to go check out them out. Apparently they’re really popular in the alternative scene.”

“Oh sounds like fun.” Marinette and the girls surround her countertop and take a shot. The liquid burning her throat a little but she ignores the feeling.

Rose nods excitedly. “It will be! Alya told me that some of the band members went to school with us!”

Now Marinette was even more curious. “Like who?”

Alya clears her throat. “Lets not ruin the surprise!” She says and changes the subject. “Mari, are you still seeing the guy from the visual arts department?” Mylene asks Marinette.

Marinette has been going out with a boy from the visual arts department as of recent. While she enjoys his company, she isn’t really into him. It just didn’t feel right, but she hasn’t had the chance to tell him they were better off as friends.

“I am but we’re not official,” she assures her friends. “I’m not really looking for anything serious anyways.”

“So if a guy comes up to you and asks you to go home with him, you’ll take it?” Alya wonders and Marinette thinks about it.

“I’ll consider it.”

Alya accepted her answer and they took one last shot before leaving to the club.

XX

The club was in a weird place in the city that was populated with sleazy clubs and teenagers who looked for a good time where they shouldn’t be looking.

The girls go through a dark alley and Alya reads the instructions that her mystery man gave her. She stands in front of a black door and knocks four times.

A minute passes and the door opens, revealing a huge bodyguard wearing a white mask.

“Alya?” He questioned.

Alya nods. “Yup! Carapace told me to come through the back for VIP.”

The bodyguard looks at the girls, stepping aside to let them in. They each held one another’s hand so they wouldn’t lose each other as they entered.

The place smelled like cigarettes and hard liquor, a smell that Marinette wasn’t to fond of but can tolerate. They make it to a small section of the upper floor that had a great viewing of the whole dance floor and stage. The girls sat down and Alya ordered them all a round of drinks.

“Carapace? I thought it was Nino who invited us?” Rose asks Alya.

Alya shakes her head. “No it’s just a nickname that they go by here. You see, majority of these artists are undercover celebrities who like to play music by their own terms or just like to escape the crazy world that they live in. So they make up an alternative identity so they can party or rock out without worrying about the paparazzi.”

“Wait, then how will you know which one is Nino?” Marinette asks. While the concept was cool, she wasn’t sure if she would like to hide her identity from the people she was close to. Unless she really need to.

Alya shows her a picture of Nino wearing a green mask. She then shows the others and they start to be on the look out for him.

“Well I hope he passes by so we can thank him for this cool VIP experience.” Rose says excitedly. “And it’s been awhile since I’ve seen him so we have to catch up.”

Marinette smiles and their drinks arrive. They give a quick cheers before they start drinking.

After twenty minutes of talking and joking around with one another, the lights in their section went down and so did the ones on the stage. The crowd yells out in excitement and the girls get closer to the recliner to watch the show.

Marinette can see a group of boys walk out to the stage and the start of the guitar. The lights turned back on and everyone went crazy over the band on stage.

She can see the name of the band written on the drums, Cataclysm.

What an unusual name, she tells herself as the lead singer begins to sing. He was a fantastic singer and Marinette closes her eyes as she vibes with the loud music playing.

Her friends were clearly enjoying themselves and were maybe a little bit too loud compared to the other attendees who were watching the show in the first floor. She followed along with her friends, also dancing and laughing.

Marinette looked down again at the stage, the band finishing up their first song. The lights were finally on the lead singer and when her eyes stared directly at him, she froze.

XX

(An hour before the show)

Chat Noir, or Adrien Agreste as his most of his close friends and family knew him by, fixing up his black eyeliner and mask. His bandmates were doing the same or sitting on the couch before it was time for them to go up.

Nino comes in and was beaming with excitement.

“What’s up with you?” Jared asks, fixing the strings of his guitar.

“Oh nothing just that Alya and the girls are finally coming to check out the band!” Nino announced.

“Yeah, Mylene texted me that she was here.” Ivan brought up.

Kim was stretching. “Any of them single?”

“Kim, these are our friends from school. Besides aren’t you still seeing Ondine?” Max brings up.

Kim shrugs. “It’s complicated.”

“Actually there is one girl who is single.” Nino answers Kim’s question. “Maybe big shot over here can finally get his first girlfriend.” He points at Adrien who was resting comfortably on the couch.

Adrien opens one eye and looks at Nino. “I can get a girlfriend if I wanted to.” He closes his eyes again and stretches his arms out as he sat up. “But I told you. If I’m getting a girlfriend I want them to fall for me, not Adrien Agreste.”

While he loved his life as the son of famous renowned fashion designer, Gabriel Agreste, it came with consequences.

The main one would be how he made friends. While he was home schooled for a good portion of his early childhood, he was able to attend a real school when he turned fourteen. It was a private school, but to him it was something. But based on how people treated him, he knew he was getting a weird taste of privilege that he didn’t want.

It started with how guys would want to come over only to his place and never bothered to invite him to theirs. Sure his father was strict, but he would’ve allowed it as long as it didn’t interfere with his studies. But no his friends at the time wouldn’t bother.

Then every holiday his locker would be packed with constant love letters or presents girls would leave for him. Not to be rude he accepted the small tokens of appreciation but he never liked it.

He hated this and when he would meet up with his friend Chloe, she convinced him to transfer to her school. It was closer to his place and not as crowded as his private school.

“I mean you’ll still be surrounded by peasants, but you’ll be with me Adrikins!”

And after one long and difficult hour of convincing his father, he agreed to let him transfer to College Francoise Dupont. There he met probably his closet friends and met the love of his life...

“Adrien? Oh Adrien,” Nino says his name in a song like tune. “Time for the show, let’s go.”

Adrien gets up and grabs his guitar. “Let’s do this guys!”

His friends chuckle and they do their backstage circle before they get on stage. While they usually start off the show with one of their classics, they decided to start slow before playing their more hardcore stuff.

As Adrien, he never could be on stage with people constantly watching his every move and wonder how he will fuck up his family name. But as Chat Noir, he belonged to no one. He wasn’t the son of a famous fashion designer. He wouldn’t be in the tabloids the next day. No instead he got to play till his hearts content and go home.

That was until he looked up at the balcony where a group of girls were cheering them on.

And that’s when he spotted her. Even though his eyes were slightly blinded by the bright lights, he can still see her raven black hair that can be mistaken for a dark blue. She blue bell eyes that he can stare at all day. There was only one girl who can ever have him in a trance such as this.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

The girl who stole his heart and the one who will forever be known as his first love.

He continued to sing into the microphone, not removing his eyes from her. “Just another day started out like any other. Just another girl who took my breath away.” He sang, continuing on with his performance. The crowd loved it, girls getting closer to the stage to get his and the others attention.

But Adrien can only stare at one girl.

The one who got away.

[ireadyabooks]

Books to Read in 2021

It’s a NEW YEAR, everyone! 

We made it through 2020, and whether or not you hit your reading goal this past year, don’t worry! 2021 is a new year for your TBR, and we have an AMAZING line-up of books you should add to your reading list ASAP.

THE LIFE I’M IN 

This story of the power of forgiveness and second chances presents the unflinching story of a young woman trapped in the underworld of human trafficking. In Sharon G. Flake's latest and unflinching novel, we follow Charlese Jones, who, with her raw, blistering voice speaks the truths many girls face, offering insight to some of the causes and conditions that make a bully. Turned out of the only home she has known, Char boards a bus to nowhere where she is lured into the dangerous web of human trafficking.

HOLD BACK THE TIDE

A darkly seductive story of murder, betrayal, love, and family secrets in a small town in the Scottish Highlands. Alva knows that her father killed her mother, but she can’t prove it. The more she investigates though, the more she realizes that the truth can be more monstrous than lies/ And while you might be able to outrun anything that emerges from the dark water, you can never escape your past . . .

MUTED 

Denver is more than ready on the day she and her best friends Dali and Shak sing their way into the orbit of the biggest R&B star in the world, Sean "Mercury" Ellis. Merc gives them everything: parties, perks, wild nights -- plus hours and hours in the recording studio. Even the painful sacrifices and the lies the girls have to tell are all worth it. Until they're not. Denver begins to realize that she's trapped in Merc's world, struggling to hold on to her own voice. As the dream turns into a nightmare, she must make a choice: lose her big break, or get broken.

THE POETRY OF SECRETS

A lyrical portrait of hidden identities and forbidden love set against the harrowing backdrop of the Spanish Inquisition. Isabel’s dreams to pursue poetry and a partner of her own choosing are thrown into jeopardy when the Spanish Inquisition reaches her small town. 

SHURI #2: THE VANISHED 

Shuri, the Princess of Wakanda (and sister to the Black Panther), sets out to save a group of kidnapped girls in this all-new, original novel by New York Times bestselling author Nic Stone!

BRIDGE OF SOULS

Where there are ghosts, Cassidy Blake follows . . .unless it's the other way around? Cass thinks she might have this ghost-hunting thing down. But nothing can prepare Cass for New Orleans, which wears all of its hauntings on its sleeve. And the city's biggest surprise is a foe Cass never expected to face: a servant of Death itself.

FOLLOW YOUR ARROW

When bisexual influencer CeCe breaks up with her girlfriend, Silvie, she’s devastated. But then she starts falling for a new guy who has no idea she’s internet famous...and CeCe wants to keep it that way. But as her secrets catch up to her, she finds herself in the middle of an online storm, where she'll have to confront the blurriness of public vs. private life, and figure out what it really means to speak her truth.   

MIRROR’S EDGE

The danger rises and the deception grows in the heart-stopping third book in the New York Times bestselling Impostors series! Are twins Frey and Rafi on the same side . . . or are they playing to their own agendas? If their father is deposed from Shreve, who will take control? And what other forces may be waiting in the wings?

ZARA HOSSAIN IS HERE

Zara's family has waited years for their visa process to be finalized so that they can officially become US citizens. While dealing with the Islamophobia that she faces at school, Zara has to lay low. But when her tormentor vandalizes her house with racist graffiti, a violent crime puts Zara’s entire future at risk. Now she must pay the ultimate price and choose between fighting to stay in the only place she's ever called home or losing the life she loves and everyone in it.

REMEDY

It's a mystery - why is Cara so sick? It feels like she's been sick all her life . . . but she and her mom have never stayed in one place long enough for doctors to really understand what's happening to her. Now, at fourteen, Cara is tired of being tired, and sick of being sick. Unable to afford the care she needs, Cara's mom starts a Caring for Cara campaign online. The money starts pouring in. But something's not right to Cara. And the harder she looks, the less she understands.

HEARTSTOPPER VOLUME 3

The third volume in the poignant and sweet Heartstopper series, featuring beautiful two-color artwork! Charlie didn't think Nick could ever like him back, but now they're officially boyfriends. Nick has even found the courage to come out to his mom. But coming out isn't something that happens just once, and Nick and Charlie try to figure out when to tell their friends that they're dating. Not being out to their classmates gets even harder during a school trip to Paris. As Nick and Charlie's feelings get more serious, they'll need each other more than ever.

THE BLOCK

In the second book of The Loop trilogy, Luka is trapped in a fate worse than death. But now that he knows the truth about what he and his fellow inmates are being used for, it's more important than ever that he not only escapes, but that he builds an army.

ON THE HOOK

Hector has always minded his own business while he works towards a better life. Until Joey, whose older brother, Chavo, is head of the Discípulos gang, tells Hector that he's going to kill him: maybe not today, or tomorrow, but someday. And Hector, frozen with fear, does nothing. From that day forward, Hector's death is hanging over his head every time he leaves the house. But when a fight between Chavo and Hector's brother escalates, Hector is left with no choice but to take a stand. It's up to Hector to choose whether he's going to lose himself to revenge or get back to the hard work of living.

MISTER IMPOSSIBLE

Do the dreamers need the ley lines to save the world . . . or will their actions end up dooming the world? As Ronan, Hennessy, and Bryde try to make dreamers more powerful, the Moderators are closing in, sure that this power will bring about disaster. In the remarkable second book of The Dreamer Trilogy, Maggie Stiefvater pushes her characters to their limits – and shows what happens to them and others when they start to break.

THE GHOSTS WE KEEP 

Everything happens for a reason.At least that's what everyone keeps telling Liam Cooper after his older brother Ethan is killed suddenly in a hit-and-run. Feeling more alone and isolated than ever, Liam has to not only learn to face the world without one of the people he loved the most, but also face the fading relationships of his two best friends in the process. Soon, Liam finds themself spending time with Ethan's best friend, Marcus, who might just be the only person that seems to know exactly what they're going through - for better and for worse.

SIMONE BREAKS ALL THE RULES

Simone is shaking things up by making a bucket list of everything she hasn’t been able to do thanks to her strict Haitian immigrant parents. But as the list takes on a life of its own, things get much more complicated than Simone expected. She'll have to discover which rules are worth breaking, and which might save her from heartbreak.

SPEAK FOR YOURSELF

Skylar is ready to show everyone that her latest app is brilliant by winning an academic competition. To do that, she's going to use it to win State at the Scholastic Exposition, the nerdiest academic competition around. But when she falls for one of her team members and things get complicated, is her path to greatness over before it begins?

THE GIRL FROM THE SEA

A graphic novel about family, romance, and first love! Morgan's biggest secret is that she has a lot of secrets, including the one about wanting to kiss another girl. Then one night, Morgan is saved from drowning by a mysterious girl named Keltie. The two become friends and suddenly life on the island doesn't seem so stifling anymore. But Keltie has some secrets of her own. And as the girls start to fall in love, everything they're each trying to hide will find its way to the surface...whether Morgan is ready or not.

RISE TO THE SUN

Three days. Two girls. One life-changing music festival. Toni is reeling in the wake of the loss of her roadie father and desperate to figure out where her life will go from here. Olivia is a hopeless romantic whose heart has just taken a beating (again). When the two collide at the Farmland Music and Arts Festival, it feels like kismet. But when something goes wrong and the festival is sent into a panic, Toni and Olivia find that they need each other, and the music, more than they ever imagined.

YOU & ME AT THE END OF THE WORLD

Hannah Ashton wakes up to silence. The entire city around her is empty, except for one other person: Leo Sterling. Leo might be the hottest boy ever (and not just because he's the only one left), but he's also too charming, too selfish, and too devastating for his own good, let alone Hannah's. Together, they search for answers amid crushing isolation. But while their empty world may appear harmless . . . it's not. Because nothing is quite as it seems, and if Hannah and Leo don't figure out what's going on, they might just be torn apart forever.

IN THE SAME BOAT 

Sadie is ready for the race of a lifetime: The Texas River Odyssey. But then her brother ditches her and she has to pair up with her former best friend, Cully. It's irritating enough that he grew up to be so attractive, but once they're on the river it turns out he's ill-prepared for such a dangerous race. But as the miles pass, the pain of the race builds, they uncover the truth about their feuding families, and Sadie's feelings for Cully begin to shift. Could this race change her life more than she ever could have imagined?

THE GREAT DESTROYERS 

In this alternate-history novel, Jo joins the Pax Games: an Olympics-style competition that pits pilots of mechas against each other. But when fighters start dying in the arena, Jo is drawn into a deadly political plot. In a global arms race between superpowers, playing out in violent games that only humanity could create, comes a chilling story of clashing titans, ruthless competition, freedom, and the girl caught in the middle of it all.

[shinahbee]

January Favorites 2021!

GREETINGS

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February 06. 2021

Hello,

I actually wrote a lot for this month, perfect way to start off the new year! I have been catching up and watching some dramas and some of the new anime this season, which i’ll discuss a few down below. I’m just realizing that the manhwa recommendations list is growing very long and it reading those titles that i have discussed made me reminisce on some of them and most of which I would re read again. I tried to read some shoujo manga again and thought the stories were shit, so i don’t think i’ll ever go back. I’m thinking of starting some shoujo manhwa’s because I have a few titles that seemed like they might have an interesting plot line. I’ll list in in my favorites if I do end up reading those, but so far i’m still filtering the BL titles .lol.

I’m just going to put this out there now before you read the “Hell segment” I mentioned a few titles that were popular that i dropped and I listed the reasons why i dropped it, they are popular for a reason and if you like that and don’t take the plot line too seriously then that’s on you, but i don’t like the subject matter being glorified rather than “lesson learned” if you know what i’m saying so take my comments down there with a grain of salt...it’s just how i read it and interpreted the subject matter, it has nothing to do with the creator and their thoughts. This is going to apply to all of my reviews, they are just my opinions only so don't take what i say seriously if it you are offended that i happen to diss your favorite manga.

Anyways, i have no music recommendations this month all i have been listening to is podcasts, so listening to people talk about nothing.lol. That’s what my life has come to...

If you would like I can share a few that I have been listening to, let me know.

Alright, you all have a lot to read to i’ll just end here.

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MANHWA/MANGA/WEBTOONS

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Recap:

Whose baby is it? (ongoing)

Social temperature (ongoing)

Salad days (ongoing)

To be or not to be (ongoing)

Path to you (completed)

Here u are (completed)

BJ alex (completed)

No way, vampires don't exist (ongoing)

Unintentional love story (ongoing)

 Karasugoka don’t be shy! (Completed)

Semantic Error (ongoing)

 Tied up in Twins (Completed)

 My Suha (ongoing)

Crash into me (Completed)

Dine with a vampire (ongoing)

So crash into you is now finished and you can now read the entire thing, so happy it ended really well and of course if you have seen my last favorites journal I made and entire post dedicated to this manhwa. The story is really heart breaking and definitely deals with more adult and mature content and it really is disturbing in some parts, so viewer discretion is advised.

That’s all i have to announce as an update, the rest is still ongoing. This month I came up with certain themes for my hell segment, last month I started with some manhwa that all had a common theme of Scum antagonists that you will run into when reading these manhwa, some of which ranges from mild inconvenience to this piece of shit should be set on fire. If you have not read that please check it out and watch me rant about stupid people.

This week featured another theme that you will run into reading shounen ai/ yaoi manhwa and manga, it’s a very universal theme of “threesomes”...I don’t get it, I don’t get why people think that’s  okay to have three dicks in a room...i’m like there’s three dicks here, that’s way too many..lol. to each their own I guess, but i’ve selected three to talk about that also deals with mature themes and a bunch of people making poor decisions.

But before that, let’s talk about the normal shounen ai manhwa/manga that I have to recommend this month.

-----------------------------------------------

Welcome to heaven

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1) Inner Beauty:

“Minjae’s been dumped. Fed up with their long distance relationship, his actress girlfriend Hye-Eun left him while he was “finding himself” in Australia. When Minjae rushes home and runs into Hye-Eun and her gorgeous new man, Woochan, at the airport, drama ensues. Amidst the chaos, the two love rivals bang heads. Upon waking, they discover they’ve changed bodies! Why have they switched? How will they cope? Will they ever be able to go back? Find out as Minjae and Woochan embark on a journey that takes “self-discovery” to a whole new level!”

Firstly this reminded me of the k-drama secret garden, if you have seen it you know that the main protagonists switched bodies at some point and with this manhwa, it happens in the first chapter. I liked how the relationship between the two boys started with minjae’s girlfriend leaving him for another man woochan, and after minjae and woochan switched bodies because he wanted to give the girlfriend a necklace as a gift , he switched bodies with woochan after bumping into him. They went to a shaman to seek out various ways to get back into their bodies while they find out things about each other that they were not aware of,  in the end minjae and woochan were drawn to each other. The necklace is a tribal ornament that has a mysterious power to show a person’s past through their dreams. It seems that the reason why their bodies keep switching was because there was another necklace that was similar that was supposed to be it's partner; they go a try to search for the mysterious phenomenon surrounding the necklace that leads to their relationships with other people changing.

my favorite part of this story is that woochan and his father didn't get along very well because of a misunderstanding, while other parents didn't admit to their mistakes, woochan's father wanted to do so and repair his relationship with woochan, which made the story more compelling. Theres so many manga plot lines whee the parent is abusive and harsh and never did they think it was thier fault, but in this story woochan's father mans up to the things he did and how it affected woochan and i'm really happy about that.

Another thing I like about this story is the end where woochan who was an actor turned director made a film about his and minjae’s relationship because he wanted their story to be remembered and inspire other relationships that were similar to their own to overcome their hardships. This story has so much meaning and it’s something I would recommend to anyone who just likes a good story.

2) False Memories (lee gpiee):

” Wan’s got a face that scares everyone away before he can really become friends with anyone. So when Ha-woon befriends Wan on his first day at his new school, Wan is elated. Ha-woon must be an angel! It doesn’t take long, though, for Ha-woon to betray him in a terrible way, and Wan discovers Ha-woon might be more devil than angel. But then an accident happens that gives Wan a second chance at friendship with his angel. And it all starts with one big, fat lie.”

This one is really interesting, it is about a boy named wan and he was the new transfer student at a new school and how despite how he looks he wanted make friends this time around. Hawoon met wan when he was climbed off of a tree and fell on him, he immediately took a liking to him and befriended him, being very grateful to have finally met a friend he wanted to be a very likable person to hawoon, but then it was discovered that hawoon had many secrets and is not the kind person he is portrayed to be. There was an incident where one of his followers was spying on him and he wanted wan to essentially beat that person up in front of his other gang members. Obviously wan didn’t want that and this caused some strife between the two of them and wan began to be bullied by hawoon and his gang members. Later hawoon was trying to escape from his brother who went to his apartment to look for him and ran into wan who hides him over night, things tooka turn for the worse when hawoon thinks wan is being really nosy about his business and pushes him away and that is when the guy who hawoon wanted to beat up his him on the head and hawoon woke up with amnesia. Being the only person who had witnessed that, wan brought hawoon back to his place, when hawoon woke up with no previous memories of wan he lied to him claiming to be his best friend and the tow of them started to pursue this new friendship, of course things don’t last forever and the both of them discovered that hawoon in fact had many secrets that he preferred to keep under wraps especially about his family.

I know a lot of comments have said that it was stupid to lie to him about being friends but I understand that it was wan’s way to know the real hawoon. Hawoon’s personality was built by the lack of trust he has received from people and he was never able to open up to a person about anything. I really liked how the incident ended up saving their relationship in the end and they have a lot of cute moments together while going from being friends to being in love with each other. This is a very wholesome story and if you like that plot you will like this story, it really is not complicated.

3) Hand in Hand:

“While running a small pharmacy in the outskirts of the city, Sam meets a mysterious and out of place patient. This man named noah who was covered in bruises every time he had stopped by the pharmacy, Sam noticed that he seems to be in worse shape every time they meet and became curious as to why that might be, one day he saw noah getting into a shady van with a bunch of people and discovered that this town had a secret that kept everyone involved very secretive. Noah who was discovered to be a part of that society still goes and sees sam in order to be close to him, sam was then reeled into his world and became part of that society that was kept hidden.”

Sorry I had to write that summary on my own cause I could not find a good summary, so basically the pharmacy was inherited by Sam when his father passed away in this small town, there was no one to take over for him so Sam had to give up his dream of staying away from this town to moving back to take over the family business, There one night upon closing he meets a man covered in bruises while coming in to buy some alcohol and cigarettes, he treated him because it looked painful and was curious about him,

This curiosity escalated when he saw him get into a van with a bunch of ugly dudes, the pharmacy assistant said that there were gangs running around and it was best to avoid these people. Sam made the assumption that it was these men that were beating that man up and decided to pull him away from them. Noah then introduced himself to sam as they walk back to noahs apartment and he showed some interest in sam and asked what he wanted as payment for his treatment, Sam of course didn’t want anything which made noah surprised, but relayed to him that the offer still stands when he feel like telling him.

Not only being curious that noah shows up in front of him each time with more bruises but the fact that he may have discovered the town had a secret.

It was in fact an underground gambling scene that caused a lot of people to be very irritable, noah was involved in this and called it “work” as he had a debt to pay back to the person that took him in. Sam didn’t want to be involved but because of his interest in noah the two of them became romantically involved upon a few meetings and Sam started to develop feelings for him and likewise noah was in love with Sam.  I’m not going to spoil the end because it was really intense, if you like mysterious plot points to your story this one will do the trick, it will keep you guessing as to what will happen next.

4) Stanning 101:

“Ji-Yul Park is an ordinary office worker who spends his spare time stanning a boy group, unlock and more specifically it’s leader, Jay.One day, he time travels back to his past where he encounters Juno, another idol and becomes his manager.What happenes when Juno develops feelings for Ji-Yul? Would Ji-Yul choose loyalty with Juno or his fanboy fantasy with Jay? And what is the purpose for Ji-Yul traveling back to the past-what is he supposed to repair or change?”

I’m not going to lie this title...don’t let it fool you, I thought this was going to be a satire on the whole K-pop fandom and just a story poking fun at k-pop fans...but boy was I fooled..LOL. This summary doesn’t even begin to describe how deep this story goes.

So as the summary says it’s about a fan named ji yul who is a stan of a group called “unlock” and his favorite member Jay was going to leave for military service and he was really bummed about not being able to see him for a while, so he went out drinking with his friends who share the same interest and cried his eyes out wishing that he could go back to the time when jay and his group first debuted.

And of course....that happened some how he was enabled into a time skip backwards to when the group first debuted. He first met up with a roommate that he was going to be sharing a room with, this was none other than juno a trainee a small company, Juno was a sensation later on in history and he was a rival of the unlock, and of course being a stand of jay he didn’t like the idea of being around juno. Upon meeting ji yul was already drunk and the next morning found juno and him had slept on the same bed, this made things between them awkward. But upon a series of events he became juno’s manager and inevitably began to understand the person juno is and how hard he worked, as well as his ties with jay. While trying to figure out what was the reason for the time skip he met another person who was sent back to the same time for a different reason his name was suho, and suho was here for another person named rose who was a in a different group. Rose is a sunbae of Juno’s and the two of them are acquainted, But there was something about Rose that was alluring and that made his “ sponsors” want to see him all the time, this lead to a lot of conflict within his group, saying that he’s the kind of person who would sleep around with anyone that has money.

Suho was a fan of rose and the reason he came back was because in his time he had found out that Rose had committed suicide, now....this is a topic that i feel very strongly about as you may know if you listen to k-pop news there are certain group members from famous groups that have committed suicide as of late, a lot of which was diagnosis of depression,

This story deals with not only suho having had gone through depression and suicide attempts but Rose who was going through that as well, Suho wanted to make sure rose stays alive, so when he was able to meet him he did all he can to be beside him and get him away from these sponsors that clearly only want one thing from him. This had made rose and suho close enough to develop romantic feelings towards each other, it gave rose the courage to confront the ceo from the company. In the end the company ceo was being a dick and tried to force rose to sleep with these people in order to get chances to be on screen and promote their group. One of their members knew from the start what rose had to go through and after rose was being hunted down by the ceo after disappearing, the member took footage from the ceo of all the nasty things he made rose do and gave it to Suho? I don’t remember this part well, but suho somehow go the usb footage and saw that rose had been sexually abused and assaulted by those men. Rose had went to see suho at the time and saw that he found the footage, at that moment he wanted to jump off the railings because he felt ashamed, but suho explained that it was rose’s music that saved him from doing the same thing he tried to do which was of course suicide.

Needless to say, at least in this story suho’s love for rose was able to keep him alive and as soon as suho w able to convey that he had disappeared and asked rose to find him in the future. I chose to write about Suho’s story because I just want to put it out there that suicide and depression are real struggles and to please seek help as soon as you can. Back to ji yul and juno, they in fact had developed feelings for each other and ji yul was sent back because he was in car accident with juno and in the both of them lost their memory of each other that was why ji yul only remembered Jay and being a fan of unlock while not remembering the times he shared with juno and how much he loved him. This made. He was able to tell juno after some time that he is in fact from the future and the both of them tried different ways to preserve the time that they had before ji yul would be sent back. Ji yul tried to defy fate but it turns out the accident happened to juno being in the car without having him there, meaning things will still take its course and you can cheat fate. So ji yul grabbed juno who was still unconscious and put him into the passenger’s seat and said his goodbyes to him, wishing for them to meet again even though knowing that it could be impossible for them to be together in the future he drove into the upcoming traffic. Ji yul woke up again back in the time he belonged the only thing he can remember was seeing juno’s picture in front of him and tears leaving his eyes.

Omg this is a k-drama all in one package, this is where i’ll stop because the manhwa is not finished, so if you liked my summary of it so far please read the actual thing, you will not be disappointed, I promise you.

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Welcome to hell

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I don’t know how to begin this segment after writing all of that for the heaven’s segment, those stories were just so good compared to the trash that i’m about to share here. But most of the trashiest stories have more complex plot points than normal stories. I mean you need to go through hell to come out the other side right?

*warning* this section talks about mature content! 18+ only, read at your own risk!

Let’s begin then.

1) Private lessons:

“Hajoon has been crushing on Eun-woo ever since they started college together, but he hasn’t had any opportunities to get close with him. At least they have a class together this semester: a lecture taught by the popular Professor Seo Joohyuk. Hours after the first class, Hajoon remembers he left his assignments in the classroom. Upon reaching the lecture hall, he becomes witness and accomplice to a series of private lessons Joo-hyuk is giving Eun-woo—lessons that unleash his own deepest, riskiest desires.”

I’m starting off strong ...oh where to begin? This story has so many messed up characters, I’d have to say all three of them are messed up. Firstly I don’t care if your professor looks like a  dilf (urban dictionary if you don’t know what it means) you should never get involved with them. Lol. And I don’t know what school you people go to to have professors that look like this...all of mine were crusty old men who were mean and arrogant.

I makes me sick to think that there are some older men that would take advantage of people like the way Joohyuk did with Eunwoo and Hajoon. Hajoon just wanted to get Eunwoo’s attention, but because of joohyuk, he took “notice me senpai” to the next level. but I guess i understand from hajoon’s point of view that if he does nothing, he will never be change his relationship, so if he liked him then getting involve would be a way in. Eunwoo was so enthralled with joohyuk that he would just be a sex partner knowing that he would never have potential feelings for him in the end. I did feel sorry for him at first but then there was this part in the story where they were all preparing for this festival thing and he and hajoon were in a group and had to be waiters for the night of the festival, this was when eunwoo started to somewhat show interest in hajoon. Then that fricken dilf was like “you’re doing things on your own and i’m going to show you why you shouldn’t defy me...” or something like that, asserting dominance saying that eunwoo would always choose me over you to hajoon, and indeed on the night of the festival when he was supposed to work, shit went down between hajoon and this senior and fight broke out while hajoon was defending eunwoo , only later to find out that eunwoo was screwing the dilf in his office while all this was going on, I think i felt my veins snap...this idiot had the audacity to f around with that dilf while hajoon was working his ass off and even defended him. Smh....anyways in the end Eunwoo fell in love with hajoon and gave up on his feelings over joohyuk, knowing that joohyuk will always look at his other partner seojin. So in the end it worked out, but this whole story is a dumpster fire of trash.

So moral of this story is don’t get involved with dilfs, don't simp for them...lol. Just don’t do it. I don’t recommend this story for the content but if you are into trash and BDSM, then maybe this is the one for you.

2) Behind the scenes:

“Korea’s hunkiest top model Woo Taeyoung has decided to try his hand at acting once more. No more of those teen heartthrob roles, Taeyoung has his eyes set on a much more…mature role. And when he finds out his idol, the dreamy Koo Min-ki, is set to be one of the main actors of the film, he is even more determined to get the role as his co-star. The two seem to have a natural chemistry with each other…both on and off screen. Will this end up helping their performances? Or will it cause their worlds to come crashing down?”

This story is a also a dumpster fire of flaming garbage, it starts off with a model turned actor named taeyoung who works mainly as a model but is secretly a fan boy of another famous actor named minki and he went to his fan signing in disguise, only to be discovered by the fans and cause a racket and minki ended up injuring himself. This caused taeyoung to be able to meet minki in the most embarrassing way, but he wanted to make it up to him by helping him until his injury was recovered. One night minki was driven home by taeyoung and they ran into another popular actor named wonho...(monsta x..lol. i’m so kidding don't kill me...) and this dude saw minki coming out of taeyoung’s car and immediately became violent...

there it is red flag!

Turns out wonho was minks boyfriend, taeyoung only knew that his favorite actor minki was in a 10 year long relationship with his girlfriend, says the media, but he didn’t know that it was a man...and this violent piece of shit at that. Taeyoung had heard rumors of wonho being excessively violent to anyone who comes near minki and anyone who has worked with him always was threatened by wonho. So even though taeyoung reluctantly left minki with wonho he still was really worried, rightfully so.

Wonho is the worst kind of garbage out there; even being in a relationship he still forced minki into having sex with him. This is rape, even if you are in a relationship it means the same thing it’s non consensual and disgusting. Not only this but being violent to everyone that is near minki, is enough for anyone to end this relationship. But minki was that idiot who believed that the old  wonho he once knew  would come back one day and so this ongoing relationship abuse lasted for a long time. Taeyoung of course got an opportunity to make his acting debut, and auditioned for the of minki’s character’s lover, it was the first queer film in production so to the director it was a passion project that he wanted to see succeed. He passed the audition and showed his potential and chemistry with minki on screen very well, so the director was happy casting him in the role. But of course guess who finds out and showed up on the film set...wonho. He obviously made minki uncomfortable and also taeyoung, but in series of events taeyoung went to the bathroom and found wonho and minki making out inside and realized the person he admired was gay and was in a relationship with wonho for a long time. Later on he got to know minki more and found that he had romantic feelings towards him rather than just admiration. Because minki and wonho’s relationship was abusive minki was contemplating on ending it but didn’t have the courage to, it was taeyoung who showed genuine feelings for minki that was able to push minki to move forward. So while this was going on, wonho was in fact being sponsored by a certain person in order to get roles in his acting career, this person was taeyoung’s cousin...yeah i know messed up,. This dude is very toxic and made things go wrong between wonho and minki and that’s how their relationship went downhill for 10 years. Anyways to sum it all up a lot of stuff went down and wonho’s actions were no longer acceptable and as soon as minki found out this ongoing sexual relationship between wonho and taeyoung’s cousin, he broke it off with him finally and moved around different places for a while since wonho would not leave his apartment he couldn’t go back. Taeyoung and minki ended up dating each other now and he succeeded as a model turned actor with this role. Wonho after a series of events was able to let minki go after seeing him one last time and apologizing for everything he’s done to him. The movie was very successful and won many awards and the ending of the series just showed taeyoung and minki talking about their relationship on screen and off screen to the viewers...hence the title “behind the scenes”

Okay this trash made me angry and sad at the same time since it talked about a relationship that has gone bad and two people refusing to leave it since they have been together for a long time. You know when you should end things and if a person starts to change there is no way for them to be the same again. So all in all this story is really good for depicting all sorts of relationship issues and drama. I would say yes give this read because the story itself says a lot about the writer and how they think. This is one of those stories the pull you into the depths of hell and once you resurface your see things in a different perspective.

3) Turn off the camera:

“Yeon Jihoon is the leader of an idol group that’s hit a dead-end in their career. Now, he’s received a golden opportunity to save his group: a spot on the year’s most anticipated reality show, where he’ll spend two weeks living and filming with top stars Do Yoojin and Seon Yohan. The one threat to the show’s success? Yoojin and Yohan won’t stop having sex with each other. To stop a scandal from tanking the show and his career, Jihoon must keep his co-stars’ antics hidden from the cameras at all costs. Will Jihoon be able to keep these steamy shenanigans a secret for two weeks? And will he survive when both of his co-stars turn their attention on him?”

This is some straight up kinky garbage, like the description says, jihoon got the opportunity to promote his group by becoming a member in an upcoming reality show with two popular actors, the show is a reality show of the three of them living together doing daily activities while cameras are installed in their home. You can see where this is going right? When jihoon first arrived into the house to greet the other two actors; yoojin and yohan and he found the two of them in a room having doing sexual acts and even tried to cover for them when the camera crew arrived up stairs in the room.

After several attempts of the other two actors having sex at different points in time jihoon became very aware of the fact that they were doing this for the fun of not being able to get caught having sex on camera. So basically this was like a fun game to the two actors.

Yoojin and yohan were caught the third time by jihoon while having sex on the kitchen table and so the three of them had a discussion and jihoon made them sign an agreement not to touch him...of course that didn’t work and he was caught in unfortunate circumstances surrounding the both of them, to the point where both sex partners started to want to pursue jihoon for themselves.lol

This manhwa is just straight up kinky trash, it is meant to be a satire on three some relationships and not meant to be taken seriously, so just going by that, there’s not much point to the story, it’s not in depth it’s just interesting to watch jihoon reject these actors advances in order to save his virginity.lol. I feel like from the recent chapters jihoon maybe more interested in yoojin than yohan so i’m waiting to see if yohan even has a chance to be on jihoon’s radar.

This is still ongoing and it only has 20 chapters so far so i don’t have that much to say about it, this was just something really normal in terms of yaoi to read while I was reading some dark stories, the art is really nice too if that is of any interest to you.

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So there are a couple of series that are quite popular that I have left out because I have dropped then fairly early on.  one series called “Hate or Love” which i started a while back then and didn’t like the whole plot of having an abusive sibling forcing another sibling into a sexual relationship... i’m like nope...

This manhwa should have just been called “ Domestic boyfriend” I would have avoided it all together, because I have read “Domestic girlfriend” it is essentially the theme, and a giant dumpster fire of flaming garbage.

The main reason i stopped it was because the other person that I was hoping the main guy would end up with didn’t end up as the “ winner” well from what the comments said anyways, cause i stopped fairly early on when i found out the guy i liked was not going to be the end game, that makes me sad cause from the early chapters that i have read, there was a lot of sexual tension between the two of them and I was hoping this author would not push abusive sibling relationship as the plot...but looks like she did ...and i don’t care for it and find it gross...but that’s my morals, even if they were not siblings by blood they grew up together as siblings...that’s still vastly inappropriate. I'm used to it since I grew up with Japanese anime and manga with incest themes, but it still bothers me.... Vampire knight...

Even if they were not even related, i still would not like that red haired dude regardless cause his character seems like a dick, and i don’t think he suffered enough consequences for his actions to make him a redeemable character in my opinion. And also...out of 7 billion people on this earth, you would rather be with your brother...smh.

Also if we are talking about using sibling relationships in a sexual way as a plot line, then how i interpret this manhwa is that it is focused on more of glorifying abuse and sexual relations between siblings rather than making the subject matter more serious, if you know what I mean. But to each their own if you just read it because it interests you then feel free to do so, i’m not interested and decided to just drop it early on.

The other one is called “ Yours to claim” another popular series but again I don’t like dark haired dude,  I think he’s a dick and if it was me I’d choose the blonde guy, he seems like he would be a person that would treat me better. I just don’t understand the appeal of being treated like shit by people, if anyone treats you like that...please dump their ass! Because It’s not okay! Both of these have the “ other guy “ as the better option for a potential relationship but they always choose the other messed up abusive/ bad boy and i just don’t why...i just feel disappointed but literally not surprised since it’s an ongoing trope in any sort of romance based media.

But needless to say there is nothing for us as the audience to do but to read them, we don't make any calls on who the person ends up with and the plot lines that happen in the story, so that is that i guess.

I’m having a mental breakdown just thinking about these two series, i included then briefly cause they fall into this weeks’ theme of trash.

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MUSIC

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Nothing special to share in this department this month, mostly listening to podcasts .lol.

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K-DRAMAS/SHOWS

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The tale of nokdu:

I described this drama as the mulan reversal, if you know the story of mulan, she dresses up as a man and goes into the imperial army camp to fight in the war in place of her father, nokdu is an adopted child that was suddenly hunted down by a bunch of assassins one day and instead of fleeing with his father and older brother he decided to follow the assassin into the city since he was able to injure them in the leg. He followed the assassin into town and was almost able to catch them when he was suddenly arrested from a disturbance another young man in town has caused. Later he found out that the assassin was heading to a village that was out of sight and exclusively to women, in order for him to go in he would need to dress up as a woman, the opportunity arose when he helped a young woman escape from the village with her husband and she gave him her clothes in exchange for his to escape. He then infiltrates the village and now has to chase after the assassin and try to kill the mastermind behind the assault on his family. But what he discovers was more than what it seems. This is 16 episodes and is completed if you want to watch it; I recommend it since its really good.

True beauty:

Everyone and their mother is watching this web toon turned drama, I say this cause my sister who gave up watching any k-dramas watched this one and read it...this is something, she doesn’t like a lot of things so i decided to watch it after she told me it was good. I watched it and I didn’t like it mainly because the problems in here is very much a young adult type of problem, like having acne and having to deal with bullies at school, these are all problems you mainly deal with when younger so none of this drama is relatable so I didn’t enjoy it. If you like the high school romance drama setting you might like this, but I have watched so much more meaningful dramas, this doesn’t do it for me.

That’s all the dramas I have watched so far, I mainly have been listening to podcasts instead of watching anything, I find it hard to find an interesting drama to watch these days, I have been enjoying listening to people talk about nothing lol.

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ANIME

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Haikyuu:

Finished Haikyuu season 4 part 2, I left this for a while so that all the episodes were finished and every time I watch it i gives me the same feeling every time. This part focuses on a lot of characters that were not fully flushed out in the first few seasons, like tanaka and nishinoya and one of the bench players...i forgot his name. I really like their portrayal of hinata this season he really is the saving grace of karasuno, not because of his obscure skills in volleyball or incredible stamina but because he’s playing volleyball because he loves it and it is fun even if the stakes are high. I feel a lot of the players here this season were so stressed they forgot that the game is supposed to be fun, and he keeps reminding them that it is what it is and that they should live in the moment. I loved seeing that develop in his character because i feel like there was too much focused on kageyama for a while and I wanted to see more of hinata’s growth.

So I was pleased with season 4 and I can’t wait to see more, haikyuu is really one of those anime that people are widely talking about now and it really is well deserved.

Skate the infinity:

Another sports anime about skate boarding, the animation is really nice and art style is really beautiful. I know there are so many sports anime out there now but this one is really interesting, I like the relationship between the two main characters reki and langa, it reminds me of the friendship between riku and sora in Kingdom hearts, reki teaches langa how to skate board from scratch and langa being a previous snow boarder was able to race one of the best contenders in the underground skating rink and beat them in a match but of course he isn’t a genius so he wanted to learn everything from the ground up since he thought it was fun. Lol. I like seeing the progress so far in their skating journey, this anime is really wholesome.

Dr. Ramune mysterious disease specialist:

This is a very satire anime, It is really comedic and deals with a doctor treating weird diseases, like the first episode there was a girl with a disease that made her cry out condiments as tears. It's actually very interesting in terms of the types of diseases they treat in each episode and how he uses these magical items to do so, that is a really bad explanation for this show but please watch it .It’s interesting so far and I’ll write more as it finishes.

so as a finishing statement, I hope you all enjoyed the favorites for January, I have been able to catch up on a lot of things which is why I have so many things to talk about this month, I already have the next theme for the Hell segment planed out for next month, so I can't wait to share that, if you like the manhwa recommendations and my excessive ranting so far.

until then. please take care of yourself and your love ones ! lunar new years is coming up, have a great year and I hope 2021 will be a lot better please follow me on my social media listed below if you'd like

thanks!

sheena

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SOCIAL MEDIA

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Instagram: shinb_art

Tumblr: shinahbee

Deviantart: she-be.deviantart.com

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[fangirlyah]

✦ just an arrangement - Draco Malfoy x Reader (part 1)

summary: the return to the school year with the dark mark is hard enough, but now they must fulfill a more intimate request or they expect a happily ever after with an old death eater.

warnings: none

word count: 1,950

a/n: i’m pretty excited about this so i hope u like it. if u wanna be part of my (still non-existent) tag list for this fic, just tell me :)

a starry night full of light illuminated the sky.  very different from the humor y/n was holding. 

she saw herself in the mirror, immersed in constant pain, both physical and emotional. her arm, freshly marked by the dark lord, felt almost on fire, stitches and burns that were almost impossible to hold. thanks to her childhood surrounded by darkness due to the alliances of her families, she herself already knew how to create her own healing potions that sootheed her wounds for at least a while.  

she was only sixteen, but had a higher weight on her back than any teenager. she was not the only one, her classmate, draco malfoy, had and was suffering a life very similar to hers.  but he wasn't very good at hiding it, his thinner body and marked dark circles revealed his stress. but y/n was always a better actress, no one had ever seen the bruises on her arms, nor had she been seen decaying. on the contrary she was known for being one of the sweetest and most positive people with every hogwarts student. thing that put his hair on end, ‘how could she be so calm with everything that was going on?’ she knew a war was coming but he always saw her smiling sweetly at every person who crossed her path. how many times had he smiled that sixth year of hogwarts? maybe not one. 

but as he noticed her big white smiles, she noticed the lack of his. she knew what he was going through, his task was very complicated and terrifying, y/n had been lucky enough to be out of the instant murder of her own headmaster, but she had to be in charge of repairing the vanishing cabinet. 

they were not friends or anything close to the word, they were acquaintanced despite the number of encounters they had during the months, due to the similar connection of their parents. both only children, completely alone on their way to giving their full life to who-must-not-be-named. y/n did not want to be alone, since she was a child, she had tried to approach the blonde and become his friend, but he did not acknowledge receipt. 

"hello, draco! my house elf made pumpkin pie, would you like a piece?" a small y/n took small leaps in her freshly ironed dark blue dress.

"I'd rather die than try something of yours," an eleven-year-old draco disgustingly expressed to the girl who was just looking for his sympathy. 

a sympathy that, despite the passage of the years, she had never found. y/n had stopped trying, had stopped fraternizing with draco in the fourth year, when she had slightly begun to develop a crush on him. and she was, and is, smart enough to know that if her hormonal heart kept hearing his wretched words, she would have an almost irreparable broken heart. but it didn't work, because even though he ignored her, she couldn't get him out of her mind. and seeing him at least twice a month at her home, dressed in his pristine suit and his fine hair combed did not help. 

"y/n since when is your roasted chicken more important than good gossip?" millicent spoke with her mouth full of crushed potatoes, spitting slightly. 

"since always, millie" y/n was not at a time in her life where an adolescent gossip filled all her senses. 

"you're very boring... so, it turns out ginevra weasley is in love with potter!" 

"I'm not at all surprised, weirdos like weirdos" pansy parkinson, despite the years that elapsed, did not seem to forget her hatred of gryffindor and everything related to it, especially the golden trio and its own close ones. 

it was a Friday night and despite the icy weather and sun falling much earlier, the great hall was full of students enjoying their dinners. at the slytherin table there were most students, but there wasn't any sign of draco malfoy... but she spoke very quickly. 

"get up" a big, cold hand, adorned with silver rings and emeralds that stood out on his pale skin, grabbed y/n by the arm and pulled her with intent to lift her out of the seat. 

"sorry?" she looked up to see the blonde with a serious countenance, staring at her. 

"hey, we're talking you can't take her that way!" spoke one of her friends but it was too late, y/n was already standing on draco’s side, who kept holding her arm tightly. 

"shut your mouth, bulstrode" and with that, draco began to walk quickly without looking back, which she thanked as he would not see her in a hurry and almost stepping on her own feet. 

arriving on the seventh floor, finally, a large door suddenly appeared on a white wall, capturing the complete attention of y/n. draco did not hesitate and submerged them both inside the unknown room which turned out to be too small for its immense door. 

'the room of requirement' thought y/n immediately, but why did it appear before them? she wondered. 

it was the first time y/n and draco had crossed word for at least five months, since the first time they both attended a death eaters meeting as official members. she still remembers how her body trembled and as his did too, but the firm hand of lucius on his back almost held him in his place. she also recalls that their seats were facing each other, and that she saw him swallow heavily when, after the meeting, he saw the girl accidentally shed a salty tear. 

"may I ask you what we are doing here?" y/n’s voice sounded shy and calm despite having draco in front of her swinging from one place to the other, regardless of the small space. he did not speak and it had been more than five minutes that they were inside the room and the idea of leaving had crossed y/n’s thoughts, but she knew what he was going through, so she decided to wait. 

"you're my girlfriend now..." draco's body stood violently in front of her, leaving a reasonable distance. he didn't look her in the eye, but she knew he was serious.

"what the-... what?" 

"we have to be together, the dark lord wants it so" 

"since when?..." the confusion took over her body, even though her heart was screaming, 'your crush is telling you to be together, shut up and accept!' but it wasn't that simple. 

"in less than six months we will both be seventeen, your parents and mine were married at that age, and they were all already death eaters..."

"it's our turn" y/n thought out loud.

"we must not marry, just... be together...as a couple or we'll be paired with other death eater who's at least fifteen years older and I think we both know that's not a reasonable choice"

"I understand..." it was something they should do sooner or later, then they could split up and submit to some other arranged marriage. but at the moment they were both the best choice of the other. "let's do it" 

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the idea of pretending to be a couple began to really settle in y/n’s head a week of the event, when draco rested his hands on her shoulders unexpectedly on a sunday for breakfast time. she wanted to bewitch herself when she felt the butterflies she hated so much flowering. those butterflies provoked by him, which she had sworn to bury years ago and which she had clearly failed to achieve. 

her friends’ faces were transformed to the sudden change in the attitude of the prince of slytherin. they all noticed that they both slipped away from classes and most social situations over the weeks. but, they would never have assumed they were going away to be together, they were right. they used to escape because of the tasks indicated by who-must-not-be-named or because the terror and darkness had suddenly consumed them. 

then the weeks passed and their interactions increased, because they had to increase if they wanted to make it believable. 

the arrangement had begun in august and by that month, their only contact was some rubbing of hands in potions or small glances in the great hall, which however minuscule they were, they both knew that they should be noticed. 

"you're doing it wrong!-emm...I think you're putting more ingredients than the necessary, y/n" sometimes she wanted her fake boyfriend to be a better actor, his voice changes were notorious, but at least that day they were lucky to be sitting with crabbe and goyle so none of them noticed his weird voice changes, and if they did, they wouldn't have the braveness to ask. 

"I've made this potion multiple times, draco. to make it perfect a few drops of agrippa are never too much" the blonde’s ears were still surprised to hear his name, his actual name and not malfoy, come out of y/n’s mouth. despite his attitude towards her, which had not changed since the age of eleven, she continued to treat him delicately. 

"you've done this multiple times? this is the first time we are learning potions to close wounds" the last thing he wanted was to make the cute girl uncomfortable, it wouldn't show a good image for their relationship.

"I'm only curious when it comes to potions" but y/n answered with immediate discomfort, much to the chagrin of draco. 

by september, their hands were already united from class to class and their bodies were sitting together in the great hall for almost every meal, all of this causing a lot of whispers.

"your hand is sweaty" whispered draco in his ear, as they traversed long meadows to hagrid’s hut.

"sorry... is that everyone is looking at us and it's making me nervous" she wasn't used to being the center of attention, unlike him. 

"just... focus on me" draco gave a squeeze to her hand, making y/n think that, finally, the boy had given in to acting cordial in their false relationship. but his phrase wasn't over, "you must do well, I won't let you ruin this."

with that said, y/n focused her thoughts on draco. how he was holding her hand, how she had imagined this so many times and how he seemed unbothered by it. but he wasn't feeling like that.

it was only in october that they first had a meeting alone, only the two of them, with no audience present. 

y/n was on a sofa, very close to a large window pointing to the big forests surrounding hogwarts, in the common room. it was the early hours of the morning so the sun was orange painting the sky as if it were its own canvas, lighting everything around it, including y/n. her hard-covered book was on her lap and she moved it so gently that it seemed that her fingers floated. for draco's eyes it was something new. with semi-swollen eyes, a morning voice but perfectly clothed, he watched her from the other side of the place. he didn't think she was a morning person, so when he received the letter and decided to be the first to come down for breakfast as he couldn't fall asleep again, the last thing he thought was he was going to find her there. with her legs contracted towards her and her bright hair braided in a shedding way, was the first thing draco saw that morning. and for a moment, he thanked merlin for waking up so early. 

"it's time to go" was the only thing the blonde seemed to say, when he approached the couch where she was. y/n just turned around to see him. she knew exactly what he meant. 

[dessarious]

Misconceptions, Miscommunication, and Misinformation Pt81

Inspired by @ozmav Maribat AU

AO3   Beginning   Previous   Next

As soon as the portal closed behind them Chloe and Luka dropped their transformations. Marinette was once again piggybacking Chloe as they turned to look at Tikki and the other Kwami. She hadn't wanted to transform again because she wasn’t certain what Tikki had done and was worried the other four would disappear along with her. She couldn’t afford to have the League members find out if they were just temporary, and she had no way to ask Tikki with them all there.

“You couldn’t have given me some type of heads up or warning?” It was so strange talking to Tikki while she was in human form. It also hadn’t escaped her that all five of the Kwami were in her designs and she wasn’t sure whether she should be flattered or if Tikki had just picked the first things that had come to mind.

“I’m sorry Marinette. I’m tired of watching them treat you like that and I had to do something. I was going to discuss this with you to see if you were okay with it but I really do think you could use the extra help and they volunteered.” So not temporary then, that would require some serious thought. “As I said Plagg can destroy their bodies so if you don’t want to keep them here it’s an easy fix.”

“It’s not that.” Marinette just sighed. This was just one more complication that she really didn’t know how to deal with at this point. “They’ll need identities, papers, and I have no idea how to go about getting those. I’ll need to look for a much bigger place than I was thinking and I’m not sure I can afford that yet and be able to renovate it for wheelchair access as well. Not to mention-” She cut off as Damian shoved his phone in her face. She’d noticed him on it but assumed he was trying to calm down his family. On the screen was a huge house not too far from her current school.

“What do you think of this?” She could only blink at the screen for a moment before she grabbed the phone to get it at a better distance so she could read it properly. It wasn’t a house either, it was a freaking mansion. Twelve bedrooms, fourteen bathrooms, two kitchens for crying out loud, and that wasn’t counting the guest house, or groundskeepers house or whatever it was. It was three stories plus a basement but it did have an elevator. Then she looked at the price.

“Damian there’s no way I can afford that right now, and honestly it’s probably too big.” He was shaking his head before she’d even finished.

“You don’t need to afford it. Since I’m staying here for the foreseeable future I need a more permanent residence that lives up to the Wayne name and can house whatever family members happen to show up. If it happens that when I end up leaving Paris you like it and can afford it you can buy it from my father, but until then since you’re such a ‘good influence’ on me he thinks us staying in the same residence will be beneficial to the both of us. And don’t worry about documentation for your new friends, Alfred is already preparing everything.”

She could only stare at him. He’d said everything in such a matter of fact tone, as though her answer were a foregone conclusion. She wanted to be annoyed with him but she knew it was his way of showing support and caring. She looked back at the phone and really looked at the pictures. The front entrance didn’t have steps and there were at least two bedrooms on the first floor. Even with the elevator she’d rather not have to be dependent on it in case of repairs or power outages. It could work.

“Fine, but I’m paying for any renovations that need to be made for me. And I’m paying rent since there will be five of us living there and I have a feeling Chloe will be there more often than not.” Damian just raised an eyebrow at her.

“I can tell my father that but he won’t listen. This won’t be a drain on our resources at all and he’ll want you to save for your future. I will try to talk to him though.” That sounded about right. When you have money to just throw at a problem you don’t necessarily consider how other people will see it. Damian was tapping away on his phone again and frowning in annoyance.

“He says if it will make you feel better about it you can be the family designer and instead of rent comp the materials. Sadly enough that probably will work out about right given how many of us there are.” She blinked at that. Sure, the materials wouldn’t be cheap but the exposure she’d get from the Waynes wearing her designs exclusively would far outweigh the cost. Damian was now scowling at his phone. “He also wants to see if you’d be willing to work with our R&D department to make materials for protection that can be put into all sorts of clothing. We actually commissioned you for suits with Kevlar once and he was very impressed with both the utility and design.”

“I remember those. It was a fun challenge if a rather odd request. Granted I didn’t think it was too strange given the amount of people in the public eye that get attacked.” But could she really just let Bruce Wayne pay for her housing like this? Wouldn’t people talk? It could hurt his reputation to be housing a teenager. At best they would think he was keeping his son happy by keeping his girlfriend close, at worst… she didn’t even want to think about it.

“He also wants to circulate a story that you were attacked after you revealed yourself as the designer behind Functional Fashion and that’s how you were paralyzed. Between that and having you actually work with Wayne Enterprises it would make sense that we would be concerned about your safety enough to house you in a secure location.” But would it?

“What if my parents technically lived there as well? Maybe even in the guest house or whatever. They wouldn’t be there much because of the bakery but I think it would help with the public image if they were part of it as well.” She didn’t realize until she said it that it meant she was agreeing to this plan. Given the satisfied look on Damian’s face he realized it too.

“And we can have the Kwami make appearances as your staff. Digg would obviously be a bodyguard. Primm looks more like a customer service type or receptionist, and Jett perhaps something with design or tailoring? They don’t have to actually do anything but if the press thinks they’re living at the house because that’s your base of operations it would help. Lyccen…” He seemed at a loss for the Kwami of Anarchy. Granted they could change her look if they had to but she had a feeling Tikki had chosen their attire for a reason.

“Personal assistant. The way people view the disabled everyone will assume my having someone with me all the time to help with things is completely normal.” As much as she hated to say it, it was true. If she could afford to pay someone to help her with normal day to day tasks that were ‘harder’ in a wheelchair no one would question it. Especially since she’d only just lost the use of her legs. As much as she wanted to be independent she could see the use of having a ruse in place to make it seem like she wasn’t. “But how do you plan to get around the fact that there was no police report? Or hospital stay for that matter?” It was a problem she’d been trying to figure out herself. How was she just supposed to show back up paralyzed when she had absolutely no explanation or proof for what happened.

“My father invited you to Gotham to talk about this collaboration and you were attacked there. We are very private and prefer to deal with things in house so it won’t be hard for him to convince the Commissioner to make a report after the fact. We can falsify medical and travel records easily enough.” It was amazing how much morally gray area there was when all you’re doing is trying to save the world.

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[encrucijada]

FROM THE MOUTHS WITH NO TONGUE by ester cuervos

a re-introduction !

✧ genre: murder mystery, low fantasy ✧ category: adult ✧ pov: second person retrospective in a loose journal format ✧ witches, full latine cast, small town you can’t escape from, horror movie one-by-one deaths, dumbass young adults, lgbtqa+, spanglish, found family, an all-girls boarding school ✧ cw: mental illness, complicated families, suicide, bigotry, death and gore ✧ themes: collective paranoia, “people fear what they cannot understand”, outcasts ✧ tone: eerie, suffocating, whimsical, wary, anxious

a b o u t : small town princesa gloria exists in a liminal space and the warnings about not going into the forest at night are to be believed. marjorie de los ángeles is the youngest member of the local witch family and aside from eating animal tongues she’s just another student of the local all-girls boarding school. senior year isn’t the optimal time to find a classmate hung in the forest. marjorie is faced with the mystery of who is causing these seemingly random murders, all in an effort to take the blame off herself and her family. she is not doing the smart thing and leaving until she convinces her grandmother to do so as well or until she finds the culprit.

c h a r a c t e r s: ✧ marjorie de los ángeles cruz. she/they. demisexual. dresses like the kid whose mum let them dress themself on the first day of kindergarten. has adhd. witch. ✧ archie randall rojas. he/him. gay. marjorie’s best friend and baby daddy (long story). dancer. “talk shit, get hit”. was practically adopted into mj’s family. ✧ lorelai jarros quintana. she/they. lesbian. marjorie’s girlfriend and classmate in boarding school. artist. “hold my earrings i’m gonna kick this bitch’s ass”. ✧ dulce maría de los ángeles ugalde. she/her. aromantic. marjorie’s grandmother. empty nest syndrome so will adopt just about everyone. witch. ✧ ivonne de los ángeles ugalde. she/her. bisexual. marjorie’s mother. hasn’t spoken to her mother in a few years now. thrift store owner. witch. ✧ andrés cruz novillo. he/him. demisexual. marjorie’s father. was taken in by dulce maría similar to archie. “my wife is a bitch and i like her so much”. witch. ✧ xander cruz duarte. he/they. asexual. marjorie’s favourite cousin. half-witch with an acute psychic awareness (to the point of it being worrisome).

aesthetic: spells in your kitchen, animal bones spread on your bed, 2am and watching movies with a new bowl of popcorn, wearing pyjamas all day, a chill in the air that never leaves, digging up graves, steps that follow you in the forest, that contagious baby laugh, skinny love, a mismatched outfit that somehow works, your reflection in an empty studio as you dance, prayers in spanish, crying on your best friend’s shoulder without being judged, saying “i love you” platonically, a family you build yourself, big wreaths of wildflowers, lampposts in the blue hour, pastel skies, a quiet neighbourhood street, butterflies crowding around a dead body, garbage bags that glow from the inside

playlist: boreas / the oh hellos ; c’mon / panic! at the disco ft. fun ; master pretender / first aid kit ; wolf / siames ; the bones / maren morris ft. hozier ; emergency / nothing but thieves ; witches / daughter ; which witch / florence + the machine ; beautiful creatures / illenium ; eat you alive / the oh hellos ; bottom of the river / delta rae ; o death / kate mann ; exodus / ruelle ; permanence / bears in trees ; hide & seek / amber run ; i talk in my sleep / the crane wives ; you / keaton henson ; fast car / tracy chapman ; meet me in the woods / lord huron ; rose / the oh hellos ; in the woods somewhere / hozier