#and nobody who will has an uncompromised opinion

[girldraki]

i do not know what the fuck i am doing anymore

[antianakin]

Kind of interesting seeing the divide between people saying ‘it’s not really that anti Jedi, look it’s all one big misunderstanding’ and those who think it is anti Jedi.

Meanwhile, I’ve blocked more people with opinions I don’t want to see on the Jedi in the Acolyte tag since the last episode came out than I had since the first episode. Even if it’s not ‘that’ anti Jedi it’s still enough for people to voice their own critique of the Jedi.

From what I’ve seen, it’s not as bad as I was expecting but it’s bad enough.

I've kind-of talked about this before, but this is why I separate "anti Jedi" and "Jedi critical" as concepts. This show is Jedi CRITICAL, it is not ANTI Jedi.

Anti Jedi, for me, are the people who just sit there and talk about the Jedi like inhuman monsters. It's the fans who insist that the Jedi abused Anakin, kidnapped children, genuinely persecuted other cultures, forbid love of any kind, etc etc. It's the people who genuinely insist that it was a GOOD thing for the Jedi to be murdered in Order 66, that it was NECESSARY because the Jedi were just so so bad and unbalancing everything and this was meant to be or whatever. There is NEVER anything positive at all in anti Jedi stuff, they're just straight up villains basically.

Jedi critical is a range of things, but it tends to be a lot softer and it can even be positive towards the Jedi. There can be Jedi critical MOMENTS in overall Jedi positive stories (see Rebels, Jedi: Fallen Order, and Jedi: Survivor for some pretty good examples of this). This is not a thing that can happen with anti Jedi stuff because it doesn't allow for anything positive about the Jedi to exist. Jedi critical stuff sometimes BELIEVES it's being positive about the Jedi in a "individual Jedi are good people, but the overall organization had issues" way or a "their intentions were good, but they were too old-fashioned and blinded by tradition to realize their good intentions were allowing them to go along with corruption." It's not so much "the Jedi deserved what they got" as much as it is "the Jedi lost their way and caused their own destruction." The Jedi aren't villains here, they're a cautionary tale.

So when fans got worried about Headland's interviews where she explicitly said this would be a Jedi critical story, I think people thought we were worried it would be the FIRST thing. People started to assume that this meant the Acolyte would represent the Jedi as complete and utter monsters and nothing else, so when they ended up a cautionary tale instead, it came off as being like... "not as bad" as expected somehow.

But from what I could tell within my own little circle of internet, the show has ended up EXACTLY what we expected it would be. The Jedi have good intentions and they're not necessarily bad people individually, but there are ABSOLUTELY many many implications that the Jedi as an organization are becoming something negative. They may not INTEND to be a "domineering force in the galaxy," but by working with the Republic, they've allowed themselves to become no more than space cops. They may not INTEND to persecute other groups of Force users, but by being so powerful via their connection to the Republic and allowing themselves to become space cops, it sort-of alienates other groups of Force users by default. They BELIEVE they're doing the right thing and keeping peace in the galaxy, but in truth they're just being rigid and uncompromising. They've begun to allow power to corrupt them into the very thing they claim to fight against.

So, sure, there are elements of this show that end up quite positive towards the Jedi. The characters themselves are clearly intended to be likable and sympathetic, you're clearly supposed to feel sad when those characters were murdered a few episodes ago and that wouldn't be true if the Jedi were being represented as nothing more than villains or monsters. Nobody cried when Palpatine died, after all.

But there are a lot of other elements of this show that imply the Jedi are losing their way, that their connection to the Republic is turning them into a corrupt institution, that their arrogance now (even if the Jedi themselves view it as "nobility") will be what causes their own genocide down the line. There's implications that the Jedi's rules are becoming too strict, that they're allowing themselves to become more emotionally distant, that they're becoming disconnected from the galaxy and its people.

And, personally, I don't like this any more than I would've liked a show that made the Jedi into inhuman monsters. In a lot of ways, Jedi critical stuff is FAR more insidious than anti Jedi stuff. If the Jedi had been represented as just robotic, emotionless monsters, I think a lot of people would've just dismissed it as bad writing and that would've been the end of it. But the reason that "Jedi critical" commentary and interpretations has been so popular for over two decades is because it's COMPELLING and it makes sense to people. The Jedi aren't necessarily all bad, but they're "flawed" and this can feel a lot more relatable than the more canon interpretation that the Jedi are a symbol of compassion and selflessness, they're an example of how you SHOULD act, while ANAKIN is the cautionary tale of what NOT to do.

Both anti Jedi and Jedi critical interpretations basically flip the point of the story on its head by taking a message meant for someone else and applying it to the Jedi instead. With the anti Jedi interpretation, they're just taking Palpatine's story and giving it to the Jedi ("they're the REAL villains"), while the Jedi critical interpretation takes Anakin and the Senate's story and gives it to the Jedi ("they had good intentions, they lost themselves to fear, they let power corrupt them into the thing they claimed to fight against, etc").

So while Jedi critical stories can often COME OFF as better than anti Jedi stories because they seem to allow more room for positivity towards the Jedi, they're often not so different. "They all deserved to die" and "They may not have deserved it, but they caused it with their own arrogance" don't end up feeling all that different in their negativity to me most of the time.

The primary difference to me is that Jedi criticism exists in a RANGE, while anti Jedi stuff does not. Jedi criticism can be as small as one line out of four seasons' worth of positive content in Rebels implying that the Jedi made a mistake by going to war but never truly blaming the Jedi for their own genocide, or as big as shows like the Ahsoka show and the Acolyte straight-up blaming the Jedi for their own genocide and condemning them as weak failures who became corrupted by power and elitism.

It's a lot easier to listen to Jedi critical arguments and think "hey, maybe they have a point, this sounds reasonable and it's coming from someone I trust, so it must be true." And then it escalates. It goes from "Maybe the Jedi were a little complacent and old-fashioned" to "The Jedi were so arrogant that they didn't even do anything to try to save themselves because it would've meant changing some of their traditions" to "The Jedi Order completely lost their way and were ruining the galaxy and needed to be destroyed for the sake of balance." And you can see just how quickly a little bit of softer Jedi criticism can lead to genocide apologia. And most of the people who make those arguments will INSIST that it's not genocide apologia, they might even insist that they actually do LOVE the Jedi and find them really cool and fun and interesting. But they'll also turn around and, in the same breath, say that the Jedi brought their destruction upon themselves. You can see how Jedi criticism can grow, like a mold.

So, sure, maybe The Acolyte isn't as bad as some people were expecting because when they heard people getting worried about Jedi criticism, they thought it meant "the Jedi will be represented as nothing but murderous, inhuman monsters" and what we're getting seems, on the surface, to be better than that. Maybe for some people, it is. For some people, they're able to pick out like 20% of this show and just throw away the other 80% in order to just enjoy the characters. For some people, they're able to just rewrite the show in their heads to pretend it's less critical than it is. For some people, the fact that the show is badly written enough to feel contradictory sometimes means that the Jedi critical stuff doesn't seem so bad.

Some people are a LOT more tolerant of this kind of stuff than I am or just want to enjoy pretty much any Star Wars content that exists enough that they're willing to do extra work to find ways to enjoy it. Personally, this is EXACTLY as bad as I thought it would be, and I see no need to try to pretend this show is something it isn't in order to force myself to find something in it that's enjoyable to me. I'm willing to do that work only if that ratio is flipped and there's 80% of the show that's already enjoyable on its own and 20% that's a little off.

I'll just be glad when it's finally over and we can stop talking about it and let it disappear into nothing the way the Ahsoka show seems to have done.

[9worldstales]

When Sylvie asked Loki: "Why aren't we seeing this the same way?" There's nothing inherently "childish" about that question, and it doesn't imply that she is unwilling to compromise. Understanding why we see things differently is part of compromising. To automatically perceive that question as a signal of bigotry only proves your own social ineptitude and discourages people from asking for clarity; how are we supposed to discuss our different perspectives if I'm not allowed to ask why you see things the way you do?

I'd rather just blindly follow the other person's will than be misunderstood so harshly. Your misinterpretation has given me a whole new social anxiety: "What if just asking for clarification makes me look bad?" Now I need to discuss this specific phrase with anyone I intend to have any kind of relationship with. Thanks a lot.

Besides, nobody ever criticizes "heroes" who blatantly refuse entertain the "villain's" ideology; it's okay to be uncompromising when you already have enough information to know that your way is correct/their way is wrong.

Lastly, being a couple isn't "all about" finding compromises; that is just a circumstantial facet of most relationships. Being a couple is all about sharing all of life together, which shouldn't be conditional upon anything, not even the ability or willingness to compromise. If we couldn't agree or reconcile on anything else, our relationship is still complete and successful if we agree on that.

So dear anon who's not an anon because you didn't content yourself with sending me an an ask, no, you actually also messaged me the same thing so I do know actually who you are, we've a lot to unpack.

Let's start with the Marvel bit and not with the personal bit.

If you had read carefully what I wrote, you would have realized I didn't plan to say that asking people why they see something in a certain way is wrong, quite the contrary, what I implied is that I interpret Sylvie's question as rethorical, not a genuine effort to know why Loki is thinking differently, but a complain he's just not blindly agreeing with her.

The context of that sentence isn't one that say that Sylvie wants to understand Loki. She has just accused him of wanting the throne, she said she doesn't believe him and that she was wrong in trusting him. The context doesn't imply she wants clarification, it implies she doesn't like he thinks differently from her.

By the way, before she said so, he had already told her WHY he thought differently from her, so she knew his own reasons for thinking differently.

Honestly, it was such a long, detailed meta the one from which you're decontestualizing that quote, I'm surprised you managed to misinterpret so badly what I said but whatever.

English is not my mother language, maybe I used poor sentences.

Long story short, I interpret the scene this way, you're welcome to interpret the scene whatever way you want.

"Loki" is a series, it exists for us to enjoy, analyze and whatever and we're all free to have different opinions about it.

It's opinions, not absolute truth and I'm always open to discuss mine.

Now, the personal attack.

While I think asking for clarifications is a great thing, that's not what you're doing.

What you're doing and aren't welcome to do is to read a post in MY BLOG, where I'm goddamn free to write what I want, HUGELY MISINTERPRED what I said, decide you disagree on what you misinterpreted and then barge in MY MESSAGE BOARD and also in MY ASK to be rude with me and impose on me your worldview.

I find amusing how you try to imply I try to discourage asking people for clarification when you clearly aren't interested in asking me for clarifications, even though you don't know the single thing about me, about my life, about my psychological status.

You just decided from a sentence I wrote and that you misinterpreted that I must be socially inept and felt obliged to write me TWICE to let me know about it and accusing me of things that are merely the result of you failing to correctly understand what I said.

If this isn't a deliberate attempt aiming at trying to discourage people from voicing their thoughts on something ON THEIR OWN BLOG, I don't know what it is.

And now news flesh. You prefer to 'blindly follow the other person's will than be misunderstood so harshly'? That's you.

We don't have to be the same. We clearly aren't. If you think I will now follow your ideas so as not to be misunderstood by you, a complete stranger that thinks he can barge here and tell me what I am, think twice.

Also I find highly ironic you say "Lastly, being a couple isn't "all about" finding compromises;" and that, to prove your point you say "If we couldn't agree or reconcile on anything else, our relationship is still complete and successful if we agree on that."

Sweetheart, agreeing to disagree is a compromise.

In case you don't know a compromise is a way of reaching agreement in which each person or group gives up something that was wanted in order to end an argument or dispute.

Dictionary's words, not mine.

Agreeing to disagree means we give up on changing the other person's opinion in order to end the discussion. It's often judged not the best compromise, in some cases it's even judged a terrible compromise, but it's still a compromise.

So let's compromise and agree we'll never be on the same page.

And please, don't feel obliged trying answering, I automatically ban rude people who assume rude things on me, so this is the end of this discussion.

[i-donot-forget]

Eldarya Ep 7 (opinion)

Episode 7!!!! They gave us a nice ball, a nice dress and a nice moment with our LI (Discounting some details in the illustrations that I already mentioned before) the episode was very good, it is a clear transition, that little respite before everything goes wrong again.

Eldarya has always been a different otome, because the story does not revolve around the protagonist and her love story, it is about the protagonist saving the fucking world, the moments with our route have always been scarce and interrupted, remember that in TO until episode 17 we have the first date, from then on things go too fast and finally it cannot be said that we really got to know any of our romantic interests, an exception for Valkyon but I think it's obvious why. New Era has a great advantage, we already know these guys (except Mathieu but we have that connection of "hey we are both from earth"), we already know who they are, we already know this world, now falling in love will be "faster" than in a way it's good because we already saw that when Erika realizes that she feels something for someone, she goes after him (I love her for that, I couldn't ahahaha) and so we come to this episode, after the beautiful moment on the boat where we realize that we feel something for that special boy.

But this is Eldarya so...

the damn world is going to end again and Nevra is ready for war, I know it sounds ugly but I find it absolutely correct, if the earth is going to absorb Eldarya... They are lost, I cannot imagine any scenario in which the humans of the earth welcome all of Eldarya with open arms, that is, let's face it, how many countries are there where immigrants are a plague for a certain portion of the population? I'm not saying it's right or wrong, I'm just saying it's like that and with the Eldaryans it will be worse. People like Huang Hua, Huang Chu, might go unnoticed, but Koori??? Lance???? What will humans think when Chrome is in trouble and can't control himself with Earth's Moon, how are Nevra and Karenn going to live with Earth's Sun that is lethal to them??? I can only think it's going to be a disaster, besides, how does this "absorption" work? Will the portals get bigger and bigger until eldarya disappears? Will everything fall from the sky? because clearly earth will not be the most affected... Humans are dangerous, our history of clash between cultures is always to exterminate the unknown and in this case it will be fatal for both factions but if you ask me, humans are not going to become extinct...

With all of that in mind, I'm not surprised that Lance had his head elsewhere and forgot about his clothes... but hey, it was a funny moment that made me think that we still don't know the real Lance and that attitude is just the same one that Valkyon adopted after Lance's "death"...

The moment of meditation with Leiftan was painful… now I understand many things, and I believe that all his sufferings and the loss of his powers is something mental. All the confidence that Leiftan had in himself resided in his powers, in TO he was at the top, he was the most powerful being in Eldarya and he handled everyone like simple puppets, he was confident, capable of everything, the first time we saw him desperate was after losing half his life (for us), now in NE ufff he tells us, he feels vulnerable, helpless, incomplete, without identity, If everything you were was based on your strength and power, who are you without it? Despite everything, I think it started very well, Leiftan tells us the truth, for the first time he trusts something of the utmost importance in us, the fact that he is now defenseless implies many things, Lance remains on the guard because of his power and abilities which is very useful, the same could apply to Leiftan but without his powers he could believe that the HQ would not want him (although in TO nobody knew he was a daemon). He confides in us a secret that is vital to him, reveals his vulnerability and I must say that I love him too much, when he tells us that he feels exactly the same as we do when we talk to him about our powers, he finally opens up to us and then the hug melted my heart. Now that he no longer has (and cannot) protect us, our relationship will be different.

The ball, I am not surprised that Princess Koori organized a ball, Huang Hua's speech was extremely touching, my heart clenched when she mentioned those who had left, I couldn't help but think of Valkyon... Now is the time to dance and I am fascinated by how Erika takes the reins and invites her LI, here we part.

Mathieu: adorable nothing to say, I love them, his route is pure laughter and games and fun, I really like Mathieu, I did not trust him but their moments together are sooo sweet, we see him as the center of attention, something very about him but naturally, it does not attract attention forcibly, they really are standing out for what they are, everything is very nice, a great dance, I think that at the point where they left the scene, I would believe in a kiss, not passionate or anything but a first kiss all cute, nervous and natural.

Nevra: I love that he's waiting for us, I think they already act like boyfriend and girlfriend without wanting to say it hahahaha and I love him, Nevra want us and loves us, he doesn't say it but he shows it only with his actions, I still feel like he's going to scare at the key moment, I feel that he keeps many things that explode in that uncompromising anger, I wait for a very intimate moment between them that makes me cry I want to see him cry, I know he needs it, I know he needs Erika to hug him and tell him that everything it will be fine, he needs someone to be the strong one.

Lance: the moment is very nice I cannot deny it, it is beautiful, Lance's reaction to Erika's invitation is great and again I love her determination, it struck me that Lance does know how to dance, but an old-fashioned dance, that just means that In his previous time in the guard of eel he did dance, I always imagined him as the popular cool boy that everyone follows, I'm still waiting to see that, I already want to break that shell and get the real Lance out.

Leiftan: Ahhhh my beautiful baby I leave him at the end because it is my route and I love him and I can't help but fangirl very hard for him. Erika dragging him to the dance floor imitating Karenn, I loved it, Erika helping Leiftan with his confidence and security, I super loved it, the inevitable attraction between them that is so strong that the moment screams that they will kiss, I cannot express my emotion, I love him I can't stop loving him and I just want they to be alone to see the damn connection in all its glory 7u7

So I wait for the catastrophe in the next episode, I still don't know if it will be a portal opening in the middle of the crystal room or if it will be the crystal itself that does something idk, surprise me beemoov

[shini--chan]

Yandere England HCs

I remember somewhere around here in my inbox somebody requested yandere England hcs. If I recall correctly, there handle was @hehehhewaitwhat  Sadly, the ask has vanished from the box, but I still recall receiving it! So here you go:  

Yandere England

Arthur would be one of the yanderes that would play it cool at first. No cool isn’t the right word – it is cold. He would believe in keeping a tight control on his emotions, least they take over him and he is no longer his own master. All in all, a very good idea, it is just the matter of execution that matters – Arthur would be doing this in a very unhealthy way. He’d bottle up his feeling on a large part, refusing to analysis them and locate the source, not to mention expressing his emotions in healthy ways. And here would be where the yandere tendencies start to blossom.

It would result in all his ignored and unacknowledged feelings for you start to seep through in the most eery ways, ways that would be borderline toxic. What could have potentially been love would become twisted and wrapped, some of Arthur’s other issues just amplifying this. In the end, he wouldn’t be able to prevent himself from either manipulating you into his web, or outright kidnapping you.

The insistent burning in his veins never ceased, rather it grew even worse when you weren’t close to him. It was magma rolling in his veins, eradicating even more of his rational thoughts the longer he attempted to ignore it.

In an attempt to remedy it, Arthur turned the water in the shower to ice-cold. A mistake on his part. It had gave a sharp contrast and thus made the concoction of emotions stand out all the sharper. It made him wonder if the only cure would be to give into them and let nature take its course.

Yet that was something he couldn’t allow. Emotions were the leftovers of a primordial past – notions that didn’t follow any logic or decency. If they weren’t controlled, then they would control.

He turned his face up to the stream of water, as if it could wash away all the sinful thoughts about you that had begun to haunt him. That was a tragedy on its own – he never could be rid of you. You would come to haunt his dreams uninvited, invade his thoughts unwelcomed. He remembered when his interest in you had just been a mere sapling. Now it was a field of weeds, a contagion that was completely out of his control and still demanded his attention.

He shouldn’t have ignored his love when it had started to sprout, for now it had turned into obsession.

Of course, he’ll try the former way first before anything else – he would know that you wouldn’t really appreciate it if he abducted you. England would turn the charm on and boy, can he be charming when he wants to be. It wouldn’t be in grand, over the top gestures – that is for amateurs. It would come in small, effective gestures that would become bigger over time – freshly picked flowers from his garden, biscuits he made himself and then he would go over to bigger presents like a dinner in a fancy restaurant. His aim would be to have you completely smittened before he would start to cut you off from the rest of the world and to mould you into what constitutes for a perfect person.

It was a fine day; the sun painting the sky in a kaleidoscope of warm colours and caused the green of the hills to become so saturated. Or maybe it was because you were in love that the world was all the more vivid, that the air smelled sweeter and the arm that was curled around your waist felt so right.

Arthur was being charming, a good-natured smile making his sharp features softer. He had taken you out to dinner tonight, a brief affair at a rustic inn out in a no-name little village. Yet the simple meal had been the best you had had in a long time.

So, with a full stomach in satisfaction in your heart, Arthur was accompanying you back home on this summer’s evening.

“My dear, that was a very wonderful day with you”, he remarked warmly, echoing your thoughts.

“Yes, it was. You couldn’t have picked a better place to go out. I would like to do such a thing again.”

He chuckled lowly at your affirmation. “Oh, love. I wouldn’t mind doing that every day with you for the rest of our lives.”

Under other circumstances, if you weren’t so smittened with him, you would realise that what he had said couldn’t be right. Good days can’t be copy-pasted on the future forever, happiness can’t be played constantly on repeat. It has to be experienced, the cause ever varied and reinvented so that it doesn’t become dull.

Yet you weren’t not in love with him. You were neither alarmed by the clinginess the statement implied or by how sappy it was. And that was exactly what Arthur wanted.

To be clear, he wouldn’t want a weak, stupid lover. There would be nothing more off-putting to him than a whiny, spineless idiot who can’t do anything on their own. In that way, you could say he’d have high standards. He’d want somebody who is a challenge, you’d be tactful in their conduct and somebody who’d have wit to match his. Arthur has a sharp tongue and even with you he wouldn’t shy away from dispensing chidings and sharp remarks. He’d also demand you have a spine of steel, that you wouldn’t simply cave in the face of danger. If you wouldn’t have these qualities, then you’d have to adopt them, and he would be never uncompromising about that.

Ironically, while he would manipulate you into having these qualities, he wouldn’t tolerate you having them to the extent would make your relationship impossible. He wouldn’t want to be taken care of in the terms of you being the breadwinner, doing business and all that. He would want to fulfil that roles for you, whether you’re a woman or a man. It would be a chronic need to provide for you, to be the dominate one in the relationship.

You sighed for the untempt time this afternoon. No matter how much you read the page of the book, the meaning of the passages eluded you. At this point, you only had a gist of what was going on and it frustrated you to no end.

Carefully, you placed a bookmark on the page that you had been busy with and closed the hard-cover novel quietly. You knew all to well that one of the easiest ways to get Arthur in a hissy fit was to maltreat one of his books. He claimed that books had to be treated with respect, because somebody had once put a lot of effort and time into writing it. A disrespect to the book was therefore an indirect disrespect to the author.

You leaned back in your chair and stared up at the decorations of the room. Arthur of course had to live in a mansion that seemingly was a time capsule for the age of Empire. Talk about being attracted to the glorious old days.

Carding your fingers through your hair, you cursed yourself. When did you get the brilliant idea to study the classics? Oh yes, it was when Arthur mentioned the benefits of higher literature while the two you had been cleaning. He had claimed that the complex characters made the reader better at socializing, at understanding that even the most despicable characters had softer sides. That it made a person for eloquent and at understanding the nuances of reality.

And of course, since you were constantly seeking to improve yourself, you had asked him if you could peruse his library. Arthur had whole-heartedly encouraged you and you knew that he would be extremely disappointed if you abandoned this chance to grow.

So, you opened the book again and reassumed the torture.

The need for dominance would be a manifestation for Arthur’s addiction to be in control. He is sort of the opinion that power is best left in his hands, and that nobody except him can properly wield it. And if he’d have the feeling that his control over would be slipping, then he would lash out. The most physical he’d get with his punishments would be caning. All in all, punishments would always be along the lines of what detention looked like in the old public schools during the Empire.

He would also have a certain image of what intelligent would look like. That would mean restrictions in your activities: no comics, no cartoons, no fizzy drinks, god have mercy on you is you have an addiction because he would have none, he says which parties you’re allowed to go to (that would be more in the beginning of the relationship), no sleeping in, no being lazy. And if you wouldn’t conform, then he’d manipulate you into doing so.

Arthur is a man who would quickly become jealous. He’d be scared if you’d be plotting to leave him, or worse, rope other’s in into helping you plunge a knife in his back. So, he would be quick to convincing you to cut of contact with people that he wouldn’t like. This would be a win-win situation for him because the less social contact you’d have beside him, the deeper your bond with him would become. Further on in your relationship, he’d convince you to rely solely on him and that other people wouldn’t be trustworthy. That he’d be the only person that would ever truly understand you, that would have your best interests at heart, that would help you grow into the best person you could be. That the world is a shit place and that you should be grateful that he is there to shield you from it. In order to encourage that last one, he would allow you to watch the news, extensively.

If wooing you into being with him wouldn’t work, then he would coerce you into a relationship. However, he wouldn’t do anything drastic such as threatening your loved ones, rather the threats would be hidden, or he would present himself as the best option of getting you out a ditch (such as financial issues). He’d try his best to construct the situation so that you would be inclined to trick yourself into thinking you wanted it. Kidnapping would be a last resort for him.

[bondsmagii]

Thots on virgos

I’m gonna go one further and give you my thoughts on all the signs just so we’re not stuck doing this until I’ve made my way through the entire zodiac. my opinions are final, you may feel free to fight me but you will not win, and if any of you clowns give me a sign that’s technically a sign but not part of the common run-of-the-mill twelve I will find you and turn your kneecaps into shallow bowls for my hummus dip.

ARIES: top notch, get on very well with Aries, married to one. love the way that they’re always down to get involved with my stupid schemes. appreciate the attitude, love the challenge of being friends with an Aries, and I can appreciate that they’re good with competition. also their personalities are usually strong enough to keep up with mine which has been noted to be extremely forceful lol.

TAURUS: upon first glance never thought I’d get on with a Taurus because I thought they would be too chill, but outside of my current relationship my two most successful relationships were with a Taurus. love how dependable they are, love how they can stay calm even when I’m bouncing off the walls, and love how they always have some kind of creativity in them that’s very often not what you would expect.

GEMINI: honestly don’t understand why these guys get so much shit? I’ve always gotten on with Geminis but then again I’m a drama loving bastard so maybe I just don’t notice if the various accusations are true/if they’re a bad thing lol. I appreciate how curious Geminis can be and it’s a trait I’ve noticed in all my Gemini friends -- absolutely insatiable curiosity, which is a trait I respect. they’ve also been some of the kindest people I’ve known, with impeccable patience.

CANCER: I haven’t known many Cancers and all of them have been batshit insane, but they’ve also been a lot of fun and I’ve loved talking to them. they always seem to have new ideas to bring to the table and while they’re sometimes a little too emotional for me I find it’s not in the weird way? I don’t know, they’re very in tune and unapologetic and bounce from one thing to the next quickly and I find that exciting.

LEO: love the drama. love the flair. love the aesthetics. a lot of people give Leo shit for being arrogant and they are but I love it. I can appreciate a bit of arrogance, so long as the person can back it up. I like the self-confidence of Leos, whether it be genuine or a fake it til you make it kind of deal. also a lot of the Leos I’ve seen have been super hot, too, so good for you guys.

VIRGO: I haven’t known many Virgos and the ones I’ve known have been... interesting. kind of aloof, kind of weird, but not in the bad way. sometimes I’ve been frustrated because I’ve found they like to think deeply into things and analyse and stuff and I don’t often have time for that, but I can appreciate the insight this gives them. it’s practical, and I often fail at being practical, so this is a nice balance.

LIBRA: my best friend in high school was a Libra and she was great. absolute social butterfly that dragged me on numerous adventures. I can appreciate the Libra talent of generally getting people to like them or to at least tolerate them, because that opens a lot of doors that can be used for evil. sometimes want to throttle the Libras I’ve known for always wanting to hear both sides of a story whereas I just want to commit cold hard murder, but nobody’s perfect.

SCORPIO: my worst relationship was with a Scorpio but he was a fucking loser so I’m not gonna judge all Scorpios by his immensely disappointing standards. love the sexiness of the Scorpios I’ve known, and love how they align nicely with me on the evil scale. pretty kick-ass, would rather have one as my friend than my enemy, and most Scorpios I’ve known have had a brilliant fashion sense even if it’s a bit eccentric.

SAGITTARIUS: I don’t think I’ve ever met a Sagittarius. not entirely sure they even exist. I know like one single person who might be one and they were pretty cool. funny, very weird, but always brought something fresh and funky to the table. couldn’t spell “Sagittarius” which makes me think they were definitely one. this seems like a Sagittarius thing to do.

CAPRICORN: the Capricorns I know have always kind of scared me because they’ve been so fucking focused and I just do not know how to do that. like. they were the kind of people who let absolutely nothing stand in their way and I’m just... wow. I am technically a cusp with this sign and if astrology is true I can thank this sign for my ability to get anything done in my life ever because I guess a bit of that rubbed off on me. none of the seriousness did thought. I’m too pretty.

AQUARIUS: sexiest sign. I am also one myself. in theory Aquarius is the coolest sign to be because we’re fun and funky and weird and also evil. we’re stubborn and uncompromising and we have brilliant ideas. I have to say of all the signs I hate Aquarians the most though. like. my one singular piece of proof for there being any truth in astrology is the fact that I have never, ever gotten on with another Aquarius. if we remain acquaintances, that’s fine. anything closer than than and we will have a disastrous falling out that usually involves revenge campaigns or the law. all of the worst enemies I have are Aquarians, including my own mother. from one Aquarius to another, fuck you.

PISCES: from my experience? they’re just Aquarians I can get along with. all the fun stuff in terms of being creative and down to scheme and kind of crazy and with great ideas of their own, but not of the whole being a twisted fucking cycle path thing. all the Pisces I’ve known have been super creative and a lot of fun, but also just like. nice people. also all the Pisces people I’ve known have had a very bright dress style like is that just something youse do? walk around looking like a highlighter factory exploded on a Gucci runway?

anyway if you don’t like this sorry this is just my personal experience with the exception of Aquarius. you’re just mad because you know I’m right.

[vanilla-blessing]

qb top 2019 anime list

this year what I took notice of the most were uncompromisingly ambitious series that care very little for the opinions of haters. I couldn’t come up with an order for them, so pick your own on your scorecards at home.  - qb

Hulaing Babies

Five minute anime about a Hula club that nobody watched except me, blurry kaleidoscopic fountain of pastels and homestarrunner-esque morphing at bizarre angles and judiciously excessive mouth flapping, outrageously blunt visual metaphors for emotions and a finale where everyone floats into the sky with no logical justification needed or wanted. 

I learned absolutely nothing about hula or okinawa or dancing but I loved every second.

GRANBELM (while it was airing) 

Ultimately forgettable, but a fun cross-genre experiment that was very enjoyable to unpack week by week, takes a blender to normally very structured genres for better and worse. It’s obviously obsessed with both mecha and magical girl and sincerely rams the gundam and the madoka tropes together until it appears they are kissing and one of the arms has flown off. In retrospect, it was completely impossible to predict because it seemed to rewrite its lore every week and may have been making it up as it went along. I had a completely different idea of where the show was going nearly every week, so that was pretty exciting for me. I still can’t believe that the main character was actually a magical girl tulpa who had an arc where she dealt with the existential problem of not being real. All of these questionable ingredients were surprisingly hella fun to watch while GRANBELM was airing, and reacting to this bizarre roller coaster week by week through all its twists and turns was probably my favorite discrete experience this year, even though the show itself probably doesn’t hold up. But that’s okay too, it’s alright to forget things sometimes.

I just wish I could remember the name of this girl with the pink hair and the dumb face from all my screenshots? I could have sworn she was important.

KoP:SSS / Pri⭐Chan S2 

Pretty rhythm has had a really excellent year and its dumb to lump these together but I’ll do it anyway. You can’t stop me from putting this on here

Pretty Rhythm had an amazing year with the first English license in its history, Pri⭐Chan threw off the yoke of the last season’s tendency to play it safe and got immediately weird as balls. Nijinosaki Daia is a brilliant character and is essentially Jem but good. 

The franchise has always blatantly reused remixed components like plot themes, entire characters, and full cg sequences, and Pri⭐Chan has lightest version of this, by simply copy and pasting characters from other series and having them exist with a barely different last name and an identical design and voice actress. 

However, King of Prism: Shiny Seven Stars is the ultimate, nauseatingly over the top version, imagining a disembodied council of identifiable veteran voice actors that control the idols, and by extension the pretty rhythm universe, inadvisably connecting every franchise (and some shows that aren’t even in the franchise) in a veritable corkboard of meta-cosmic nonsense that made even dedicated fans throw up their hands and go along for the ride.

Fruits Basket (2019)

The Fruits Basket 2019 reboot was a solid and consistent fixture of my year, as a diehard fan of the manga it’s simultaneously the uncompromised vision of the author and the transformative modern take I didn't know I wanted. I don’t have a lot else to say about it, Fruits Basket is one of the best shoujo ever written if not the best one, and this is a best case scenario for an adaptation. Highly recommend watching this if you’re an old fan since middle school or even if you’ve never seen it before. Second season comes out at some point in 2020. https://vanilla-blessing.tumblr.com/post/184168814234/why-you-should-check-out-that-fruits-basket-reboot

Kemurikusa

 lol they called an anime smokeleaf 

In the wake of Kemono Friends 2 being a shallow cash grab from a company that decided slaughtering their golden goose and burning the corpse was a good idea, Kemurikusa is that goose rising from the ashes like the powerful phoenix to create another awkward but weirdly competent CG anime that’s oddly endearing despite resembling nothing else in the current anime industry. It writes a lot of lore checks in the first 10 episodes and actually nails the ending without overexplaining or getting lost in the weeds of its sometimes convoluted lore. RINA GANG https://vanilla-blessing.tumblr.com/post/184018114459/why-you-should-check-out-kemurikusa

Honorable mention to: Kappa

This was a great year for cryptids, especially Kappa, between Cure Cryptid-hunter hikaru hoshina repping all UMA’s, Kappard reclaiming his less handsome brother Pissard’s naming scheme and becoming the fan favorite bad guy of Star Twinkle Precure, and Everything in Sarazanmai, 2019 was the year that brought Kappa back, unless you would argue that they never left. It’s hard to tell with yokai. Also Mob Psycho 100 s2 was the most technically impressive anime i’ve ever seen in my life but I felt it was more important to honor this caboose.

- qb ask me anything about UMA

[ninwrites]

your heart is my home

Pairing: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood

Words: 3619

Summary:

magnus and alec go house hunting.

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written for a prompt by the wonderful @kindaresilient ❤

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Read on AO3 or below the cut xx

“I love you,”

Alec’s hands cup Magnus’ face, trembling slightly from the excitement rocketing through him. He hadn’t thought that asking again would have worked, just took the chance whilst it was there because then nobody could say that he didn’t try.

He hoped, of course, that Magnus would say yes, but he could never have expected it.

“I love you, too.” He whispers, awestruck and sweet.

It’s a novelty he hopes never wears off - the way his heart skips at knowing that he has this, really, truly has a love all his own, the way Magnus’ heart lights up when he hears that Alec loves him too, as though there’s any universe where Alec wouldn’t be madly and deeply enchanted with the man before him.

“Come here,” Magnus murmurs under his breath, pulling Alec forward by his hips, as though he’s the one that’s been touch starved for what feels like weeks, as though Alec is being unfairly reserved.

Alec would lock his office door and quite happily cuddle with Magnus by the fireplace in a heartbeat, if he were permitted. He misses being close with Magnus, just grounding himself in Magnus’ presence, his touch, his warmth.

It was something that not even Asmodeus could take away from him, something that was all his own, not tied to his magic or his title but him. The true Magnus Bane, the soul that Alec fell for.

“If you insist,” Alec whispers against the corner of Magnus’ mouth, his palms warmed against the stretch of Magnus’ smile.

It’s the little moments like this that he lives for. The tease of Magnus’ fingertips over his shirt, dancing over his abdomen, the little intrigued hum he makes when Alec slides his fingers against the nape of Magnus’ neck, bending his head slightly to deepen the kiss, Magnus’ steady heartbeat pounding against his chest.

Intertwined and inescapable and impossibly in love.

“So, how does this work?” Alec brings up, later, once the lights are off and Magnus has tucked his head into the space of Alec’s neck that feels like it was made for this.

“Snuggling? I think you’re a gold star student myself, Alexander, but if you need some tips-“

Alec gently pinches Magnus’ side. “You know that’s not what I meant.”

“My apologies,” Magnus purrs, though there’s a sharp smile hidden in the kiss he places against Alec’s clavicle. “How does what work, darling?”

Alec waves his free hand above his head, aware of how much amusement Magnus will get out of his floundering, yet not minding it. When Magnus teases him about talking with his hands, there’s too much warmth behind it for Alec to be offended, and too much trust between them for Alec to be uncomfortable.

“Finding a new apartment. If you even want to look for an apartment, I mean I know you loved living in the loft, and I did too, but maybe you want a house, or a mansion like Lorenzo has, though probably less gaudy, or even a farm-“

Magnus kisses Alec before he can finish his sentence, pulling back with a blinding grin, his cat eyes alight in the dim room. Alec’s cheeks flush, but he finds himself grinning along too.

“I have far better taste than a gaudy mansion like Lorenzo’s.” Magnus points out. “As for the finer details, an apartment, or house or even a farm - that’s something that we can both decide.”

Alec hums. “I don’t think I’d mind living on a farm. We could get chickens and sheep, and a dog to round up the sheep, and even a little goat we could name Jace.”

“I’m sure he’d love that.” Magnus points out, imagining the conflict on Jace’s face between the delight of being a namesake and the horror of the recipient being a goat.

“You never know.”

Magnus rests his palm against Alec’s chest, tracing the love rune against his skin - one of few he’d bothered to learn. “We can go looking tomorrow, if you’re free. I’m rather, indisposed at the moment myself. It might give us an idea of what we both like.”

Alec frowns. “So, you just, walk around other people’s homes? Are they there? Do they glare at you to stop you from touching their stuff?”

Magnus hides his grin against Alec’s skin. He’s a little worried that one day, and soon, his cheeks will split from smiling so widely. “Sometimes there is people there, but usually it’s either empty - like, a blank slate - or furnished with the idea that people will be able to see themselves living there. But they don’t usually glare.”

“Huh.” Alec idly traces Magnus’ ribs. “I know there are Shadowhunters who’d buy mundane homes, but in Alicante all of the houses are family owned. I’ve never even thought about looking for somewhere to live before.”

“This will be a new first for you then.” Magnus points out, simultaneously charmed by Alec’s outlook and astounded by the distance Shadowhunters put between themselves and others.

Alec drops a kiss to the top of Magnus’ head. “I seem to be accumulating them a lot, these days. Thanks to you.”

“It’s my pleasure.” Magnus promises, because for him, that is how it feels. It’s a privilege to see Alec grow into the man that he was always meant to be, to support him in his journey towards true, and uncompromised happiness.

If there is anybody who deserves it the most, it is Alec.

Magnus loves Alec, more than anything in the world, but there is only so much a person can take before they’ve reached their breaking point.

“Alexander,” Magnus grits his teeth. “I love you, believe me, but if you don’t shut that damn alarm off, I will have to break up with you. It’s a matter of life and death.”

“It’s half-past ten.” Alec points out, smoothing his hand across Magnus’ back. “Not that I would hold you accountable for your actions whilst you’re so dreadfully sleep-deprived, but it is the time we agreed upon waking...”

Magnus shoves his face further into the pillow. It smells like Alec’s cologne, the one he wears on date nights, and it’s the warmest place in the entire Institute - well, second, to Alec’s arms, of course, but he’s dragging himself from the bed and so Magnus is revoking his cuddling privileges in retaliation.

“We’ve already missed breakfast.” Alec states. As though he’s sad about it.

“Shame,” Magnus mumbles into the pillow.

He can hear Alec bustling around the room, his socked feet brushing against the carpet, the low whistle that sounds like a generic top 40’s hit, though Alec would steadfastly deny it if asked. It’s simple, and easy, and even when everything else in Magnus’ life feels like it is crashing down around him, he’s grateful to have Alec at the center of it, keeping him stable and picking up any pieces that chip off, holding them carefully until Magnus is ready to put himself back together again.

“We could do brunch,” Alec suggests, his voice echoing from the bathroom. “If you get your ass out of bed.”

Magnus huffs a laugh into the pillow and rolls onto his back. It is a surprisingly comfortable bed, considering where it’s located, but he supposes that’s a perk of being the Head of an Institute and not just another soldier. They have an odd sense of hierarchy, here.

“I happen to have it on good authority that you love my ass,” Magnus points out, glancing at Alec through half-lidded eyes.

Alec leans against the door-frame of the bathroom, sweatpants resting low on his hips, arms folded across his bare chest. “I love all of you.” He shrugs, his eyes trailing low and then back up with a slow smirk. “Including your … assets.”

“Alexander Lightwood,” Magnus pulls himself up onto his elbows, the sheets slipping down to pool around his waist. “Did you just make a pun?”

Alec grins. “I flirted too. Can you believe it?” He spreads his palm flat against his chest. “I’m growing up so fast.”

Magnus is grateful that the moment is so light, for there’s a depth to Alec’s words that would bring a stronger man to tears; he has come so far from when they first met, he’s blossomed and he’s glowing and happier than Magnus could have ever wished for, and he’s done it on his own.

Magnus supported him, cared for him and loved him through it all, but Alec did all of the hard work on his own - it was his own strength and determination to carve out a better life for himself that saved him.

Magnus is just grateful that he’s lucky enough to witness it firsthand.

Alec’s stomach grumbles, and Magnus is brought careening back to the present. “Okay, this growing man needs some food. I have to sign off on some paperwork but after that, I’m all yours.”

Magnus smiles warmly. “Brunch, then. I’d best pretty myself up whilst you’re gone.”

Alec crosses the room, leaning down to draw Magnus into a slow kiss. He tastes like peppermint and doesn’t seem to mind that Magnus’ doesn’t. “You’re already the most beautiful person in the world.” He states, pulling back just far enough that Magnus can see the smile in his eyes.

“You’re biased.” Magnus contends, his heart fluttering when Alec smooths his hand over Magnus’ chest.

“Perhaps.” Alec drops a kiss onto the tip of Magnus’ nose. “That doesn’t mean that I’m wrong.”

Even if it did, Magnus found it hard to believe that Alec’s mind would change - and what a spectacularly unfamiliar delight that was, to feel the faith a person had in their opinion of you, that nothing would be able to sway them.

Alec is everything to Magnus - and he’d even dare to believe, that to Alec, he is too.

“Magnus Bane, in the flesh. I almost wouldn’t believe it if not for the truth of my own gaze.”

Magnus squeezes Alec’s hand, almost sensing his confusion, before letting go to bring the real estate agent into a warm, yet politely distant hug.

“You did such a good job with the last place, I thought I’d see what properties you’re dabbling in these days.” Magnus reaches back for Alec’s hand, encouraging him to step forward. “Eudora, meet Alec Lightwood. Alexander, this is Eudora, the best realtor I’ve had the pleasure of acquainting with. Her style is impeccable.”

Eudora glances at Alec, slyly. “He’s quite the charmer, isn’t he? A silver tongue if I’ve ever met one-” Eudora tucks a stray indigo lock behind her ear, revealing the sharp point. “As a Seelie, I’ve run into a few.”

“He’s spellbinding,” Alec agrees, leaning into Magnus’ shoulder. He hadn’t expected a Seelie realtor, but then, it’s not exactly a stretch either. “I think it’s the genuineness, he really makes you believe what he’s saying.”

“I can’t tell if you’re both agreeing that I’m a liar,” Magnus intervenes. “Or bonding over my honesty.”

Eudora winks at Alec, and for a second, he sees a glimmer pass across her skin, a hint at turquoise scales beneath a mundane glamour. It’s a sign of trust, he knows, and he’s grateful for it - Eudora is clearly important to Magnus, even if it’s more on a professional level than a personal one, and her trust means a lot.

Eudora claps her hands together, shimmering blue nails clicking lightly. “Right. The two of you came to view houses - first up is a darling Victorian townhouse, with original features and a modern twist that perfectly blends multiple eras together…”

Alec trails off, still listening but finding difficulty in making sense of any of the words that Eudora is saying. Fortunately, Magnus seems perfectly enrapt with the conversation, volleying questions back at Eudora that, from the outside, seem to be the right ones. Magnus keeps his hand intertwined with Alec’s whilst Eudora leads them through the house, and Alec is content to trail behind.

It really is a beautiful house.

The outside is an elegant white, as are the walls inside, but Alec can see where Magnus would put his own flair on the place; the hallway where he’d display a delicately woven rug, the living room that would have sprawling loveseats and couches, a glass coffee table to rest fresh flowers upon, a fireplace mantel to display mementos from their trips, and framed photos. He’d put the grand four poster bed in the main bedroom upstairs, and use the opposite room as a bedroom for Madzie whenever she’d visit, the remaining bedroom down the hall for guests who decide to pop by. His office, connecting to the kitchen would be filled with various books, science and literature and modern romance that he’d refuse to admit to anyone else he loves, a sprawling desk to work on spells and potions and writing his next magical tome.

Alec could hang his keys from a little hook near the front door, his boots under the entryway table. He could have a little garden out the back, see if his green thumb is truly as black as his mother’s; they could adopt a cat, and make doors for easy access so it could come and go as it pleases. He could have a reading chair by the fireplace, to curl up in when it’s cold and Magnus is busy puttering away in his office. They could cook together in the marble-topped kitchen, Alec on one side of the breakfast bench with a silly apron, Magnus on the other with the food that they intend to eat while he instructs Alec to stir this, or taste that, or just look his handsome self because that’s help enough.

They could host barbecues in the summer and dinner parties in the fall, share tall tales of their day over takeout as they sink into the couch, take days off to watch movies in their own home theatre in the den and wake up each morning knowing that this was a place that they shared together.

Magnus and Eudora are too distracted talking about mouldings or skirtings or something else that Alec has no concept of, and he’s struck with gratitude for the lack of attention on him. He slips his hand from Magnus’ and offers a tight smile in response to Magnus’ questioning gaze, darting through the kitchen to the back patio.

The feeling of fresh air whistling against his face is a cool reprieve from the heat that had been pricking his skin inside. He knew that this wasn’t a casual date, it was an important trip and at the end of it, there’d be an important decision to make, but nowhere in his train of thought had it truly sunk in what they were discussing here.

Yes, he’d asked Magnus - essentially - to let him move with Magnus, and he doesn’t regret it. He loves waking up next to Magnus, and hates going to bed without him, considers it a specific and terrible form of heartache when Magnus is gone because missing him hurts, even if he returns only an hour later. He knows, has known for longer than he’s even realised, that he wants to spend the rest of his life with Magnus - but the weight of it feels heavier now than it ever had before.

This is the first real step they’ve ever taken together; before, it was all abstract conversation and wishful thinking, but this is tangible and real and entirely possible and Alec hadn’t prepared for the shift, hadn’t even expected it.

It’s a small grace that he’s having this, admittedly minor, freak-out before any big decisions have been cemented. It’s nice to know that he can learn from his past and not repeat the same mistakes.

His next wedding won’t be a mistake. He’s going to make sure that he’s doing it for love, and for himself, and Magnus, and not anybody else.

“Alexander?”

The French glass doors don’t make a sound when they slide open, giving Magnus the chance to hover behind Alec, close enough to touch if he so desires, before Alec notices that he’s there.

“It’s a beautiful view, huh?” Alec’s voice cracks on the final word. He fiddles with the collar of his jacket, his wrist resting against the erratic pulse of his chest.

Magnus knocks his shoulder against Alec’s. “Yes. Yes it is.”

Alec shakes his head, glancing over at Magnus. He’s beaming, smirking in that subtle way that means he knows exactly what Alec is thinking, and is far from ashamed about it.

“I was genuinely talking about the view,” Alec gestures towards the backyard half-heartedly.

Magnus shrugs. “I prefer mine.”

Alec sighs, but there’s hardly any exasperation to it. He’s far more charmed than he’d like to admit, and even just this blip of conversation has chipped away at a little of his nerves. Magnus has this uncanny ease at grounding Alec, and making him feel comfortable no matter the situation around them, like an anchor at sea.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

“Free of charge, for you.” Alec scours the back of his hand across the cut of his jaw. “I have to warn you, though, it’s kind of stupid.”

Magnus rests his hand against the small of Alec’s back. “I find that hard to believe.”

Alec lets his head drop against Magnus’ shoulder, wrapping his arm around Magnus’ waist. Magnus kisses Alec’s temple, squeezing him close, hand curved against Alec’s hip. Alec feels bad for wasting their time - for wasting Eudora’s time, too - but he can’t seem to get his brain onto a different train of thought. It’s determined to ride this one out until it crashes and burns.

“It could just be me,” Alec acknowledges. “I’m not exactly well-versed in relationships, and I’ve certainly never considered any kind of future as much as I have this, but it all just feels very … I don’t think that I really thought about how big of a deal this is, before, and now it’s suddenly very real.”

“We don’t have to go through with this if you’re not ready.” Magnus soothes circles against Alec’s skin, his fingers hooked beneath Alec’s shirt. “Today is just, house hunting for fun. Getting you out of those shadows you’re so fond of chasing.”

Alec angles his head so that he can look up at Magnus without moving from what is quite a comfortable position. “That’s the thing. I am ready, and I know I’m ready, I just didn’t think past that? It’s easy for me to say that the only future I want is the one with you in it, but acting on that is completely different. I don’t know how to tell what the right house is. I don’t even know how to live on my own! I’ve always lived in the Institute, where there are like, hundreds of other Shadowhunters at a time. I’ve been coddled and now when it comes to making important life decisions, I’m lost.”

Magnus cups the side of Alec’s cheek. “You’re not alone in this, Alexander. I’ve never moved in with somebody before - but then, I’ve also never loved anybody as much as I love you. Both of those are utterly terrifying to me because they’re so new, but that doesn’t mean that it isn’t the right thing for me. We don’t have to choose a new house today - we don’t even have to choose this one. There’s no pressing time schedule that we have to adhere by, we just take it at our own pace.”

“We live in a world that could end at any moment,” Alec points out, somewhat petulantly, because he knows that Magnus is right, and that it is a fact Magnus is well aware of.

“So why are we wasting time staring at a pristine backyard that costs more than the Institute’s annual food budget alone, when we could head down to Coney Island and eat ice-cream before dinner like the crazy kids we are on the inside?”

Alec pouts. It can be difficult dating a warlock - not because of the stark differences in their people, but because he’s a smart-ass who disguises his omnipotence within sugar-coated promises that he knows Alec can’t turn down, without actually coming out and just saying ‘I told you so’.

“I do like ice-cream.” Alec admits.

“I know.” Magnus kisses Alec’s temple. “Come on, let’s thank Eudora for her help before she makes me promise her more werewolf fur than I actually have.”

“Werewolf fur?”

Magnus guides Alec back towards the house. “I don’t ask questions, Alexander, I just retrieve the ingredients. Werewolves shed more than dogs, it’s not difficult to acquire, I just don’t feel comfortable keeping stock in the Institute - no offence.”

Alec shakes his head. “None taken.”

“We’ll be okay, Alexander. We’ll figure it out, together. That’s kind of what sharing a future with somebody means.” Magnus frowns. “Apparently.”

It’s a peculiar sense of calm that washes over Alec. As big and impossible as this feels to him, is only matched by Magnus; they’re both in this rickety little lifeboat together, holding onto keep themselves afloat, but if worse comes to worst, they’ll capsize together.

If it doesn’t? They’ll find a house that they both love, where they can take the next steps - together. Alec has no doubt that he and Magnus have a bright future ahead of them. He just needs to be patient, and let it come to them.

“You really have that much faith in our future?” Magnus asks as they pass the threshold. “You just, know, that we’ll have a good one?”

Alec cups Magnus’ face and pulls him in, kissing him through a blinding grin. “I have faith in us. That’s all I’ve ever needed.”

[charminglatina]

THIS IS AN EXTRA LONG POST!

I have written two previous posts about why Bughead is one of the worst ships on television right now (check the Anti-Bughead tag on this site and you will be able to see them). Like I stated in my previous posts, there are many reasons to dislike Bughead as a couple. Every time I say that I’m done listing my reasons for disliking this couple, more reasons just continue to pop up in my mind. Here’s another 10+ reasons why I don’t ship Bughead and why they are currently one of the worst written couples on television.

Bughead is a rebound relationship: The fundamental truth is that Bughead’s relationship is a rebound relationship. Are we just going to conveniently forget about the fact that for over ten memorable years, Betty was entirely in overwhelming love with Archie and had planned on wanting to be with him in a romantic relationship in 1x01? Are we just going to brush aside that Betty finally developed the guts to tell Archie how she felt for him after secretly pining away for him since they were kids? Are we just going to completely neglect or erase the fact that Betty made a love confession to Archie and informed him how she felt for him and that she has always cherished him? Betty has loved Archie for years. She genuinely wanted to be with him romantically. It was invariably the boy that she considered as her true love and soulmate since she was a little girl. It was the boy that she assuredly had this extraordinary deep connection with, stronger than anything that she has experienced. How am I to sincerely believe that Betty could move on from Archie so quickly just like that and then jump into another complex relationship with Jughead when it’s blatantly apparent that Bughead is undoubtedly a rebound relationship? Betty has never loved anyone other than Archie in her life. Then suddenly, it’s like she just forgot about her genuine feelings for Archie and then declares Jughead as this epic love?? It makes zero sense whatsoever. Betty jumped into a passionate relationship with Jug so fast after confessing how she felt for Archie. How can people not believe that it is a rebound relationship? Nobody moves on like that after being undoubtedly in ardent love with someone so intensely for so long. One specific episode, Betty is eagerly telling Archie she doted on him her whole life and then four episodes later, she is impulsively kissing Jughead like Betty admittedly having emotional feelings for Archie never happened in just the previous chapters before? Because of Bughead being undoubtedly a rebound relationship, their relationship looks instantly rushed and seems naturally forced. The undeniable fact that the writers refused to indeed develop Bughead into a proper romantic relationship with a personal journey and emotional development makes Bughead look even more like a rebound relationship. It’s like the writers merely randomly threw Jughead and Betty together in a link because they instantly wanted to abundantly prove that Betty was over Archie and had promptly put her romantic feelings for him behind her, but I’m sorry, that is undoubtedly horrible writing. Bughead looks like a rebound relationship for two fundamental reasons: 1.) Betty nonetheless harbors unresolved feelings for Archie. We didn't see her get over Archie throughout considerable time. We never essentially witnessed her have any specific kind of profound reflection on what her complicated feelings for Archie meant for her and how it undoubtedly changed her. She candidly confessed how she felt passionately for him in the first episode, and after 1x02, it’s like it was conveniently forgotten and never spoken about again. 2.) Bughead is too rushed, and Betty moved on too quickly after promptly telling Archie how she ultimately felt for him. I understand it’s normal to want to move on when the object of your affection doesn’t reciprocate your affections, but this was just way too fast. I understand this is fiction and all, but if Betty is going to move on and jump into another relationship with Jughead, at least make it look realistic and make it make sense. At least execute Betty and Jughead to have some proper development and make their relationship grow before they start fervently kissing each other and tearfully confessing to each other that they are epic love and soulmates and blah, blah, blah. There are so many unresolved things about Bughead that make them look like an apparent rebound relationship. Because of this, I’m uncertain if Betty is just merely projecting her love/genuine feelings for Archie onto Jughead and her relationship with him. It causes me to wonder if Betty is living her dream relationship with Archie through the current relationship she’s in with Jughead. BUGHEAD IS UNDOUBTEDLY A REBOUND RELATIONSHIP, PLAIN AND SIMPLE. 

Bughead is the worst ship or portmanteau name: The ship name “Bughead” is one of the ugliest ship names I have ever heard. I mean, who on earth could ship a couple with the portmanteau name “Bughead”? The ship name sounds like a couple that typically has nasty ass hygiene and undoubtedly has head lice regularly. I mean, couldn’t they be termed something else? Aren’t there better ship names for this couple instead of something that is named after head lice? I know precisely it’s an entirely absurd and shallow reason for me to hate Bughead positively, but the ship name is ridiculous on so many appropriate levels. But, on the other hand, I'm unsurprised that Bughead invariably has such a hideous ship name. It’s fitting that such a gross, mediocre and boring couple like them possess such an ugly ship name.

Bughead is first love: In my candid opinion, Bughead isn’t true love or great love. It’s first love. Bughead reeks of the typical high school first love relationship. Now, I'm not saying there is anything wrong with first love. Many of us have experienced first love at some point in our lives. We likely experienced it during our teenaged hormonal years where we thought that the person we were in a passionate romance with at the time was going to be with us forever and we were going to get married and live happily eternally after. Uh, newsflash. The majority of people rarely, if ever, end up with their first love or high school sweetheart. First loves are first loves for a specific reason. Bughead is the epitome and standard definition of a relationship that is first love. Their codependent relationship is based on passionate impulses and a distinct lack of proper planning. Bughead instantly rushed into their relationship without any conceivable kind of accomplished journey. That’s what first love is. Bughead is based precisely on puppy love and foolish infatuation. It isn't true love. True love is so much stronger and deeper than Bughead could ever possibly comprehend. Allow me to properly break down the fundamental differences between first love and true/great love: First love is typically cliche and high school. True love is mature and evolving. First love is based on infatuation and youthful idealism. True love is based on deep love/meaningful connection and emotional realism. First love is based on violent impulse. True love is based on sustainable development. First love is based on uncontrolled lust/consuming passion. True love is based on deep love and social bonding. First love is based on committing ill-advised and foolish decisions in the name of love. True love is based on being rational, planning and thinking carefully before executing key decisions. First love is based on a noticeable lack of personal trust and dishonesty in a problematic relationship. True love is based on trust, straightforward honesty and effective communication between two people. Do you undoubtedly see where I’m going here? Bughead provides all of the essential qualities of a first love relationship. First love relationships are careless, reckless, and impulsive. First love relationships lack the unbreakable bond of love and deep connection of love required for a long-lasting romantic union. It is precisely why I genuinely believe that Bughead won’t last and why they aren’t endgame; because Bughead isn’t a true love/great love, it’s the first love. Bughead naturally lacks the substantial connection and deep, everlasting love of a true romance. They lack the maturity that is required to make a long-lasting romantic union. They lack mutual trust and uncompromising honesty in their complex relationship. Betty and Jughead are constantly concealing secrets from each other, lying to each other, not communicating with each other. These are all qualities that don’t exist in a relationship that is one of the true loves. First love is also incredibly toxic and problematic. They constantly fight with each other. There is much tension in this kind of relationship. Everything is based on impulsive feelings. It is what Bughead stands for. Bughead is toxic because it’s naturally a first love, not true love. If Bughead were true love, their fraught relationship wouldn’t be as problematic as it is respectively. They wouldn’t have so many problems and issues in their relationship on a non-stop basis. Bughead appears to be a first love relationship because of the significant lack of organic chemistry and mutual passion. Many first love relationships don’t necessarily have palpable chemistry and passion. It’s like a lifelong friendship but with gentle hints of romanticism in it. It is pure Bughead. Now, I’m not declaring anything negative about being in first love relationships. I admittedly had a first love too. And I genuinely believed I was going to be with my first love for the rest of my life and I would live happily ever. But that’s merely not reality. The fact is statistics have shown that the majority of people DO NOT end up with their first love or high school sweetheart. It’s because we as genuine people are constantly changing and evolving tremendously and growing abundantly with considerable time. And that includes growing out of our first loves and high school sweethearts. Bughead is typically the first love and therefore, I don’t think they will be a long-lasting union. Jughead and Betty are going to mature, they are going to change, and they are going to grow up and realize their relationship isn’t something that is meant to last forever. Even now, their stable relationship is naturally starting to grow stale and distant because of how impulsively they got together in the first place. Eventually, first love fades instantly. However, true love never fades. That’s why I reasonably believe that Barchie is true love. Because unlike Bughead, Barchie essentially has gradual development and a unique journey. True love takes time to develop; it’s not something that is rushed into. First love is a sprint, and true love is a marathon. And Bughead = Sprint, Barchie = Marathon.

Barchie has more history in comparison to Bughead: We all popularly know that Archie and Betty have known each other since they were innocent kids. They have history and have a powerful, deep bond unlike any other two characters on this show. Archie and Betty grew up next door to each other as they were next door neighbors. They recognize each other better than anyone, and they intuitively understand each other better than anyone. Betty has been in unconditional love with Archie since childhood. Those are the kind of feelings that don’t go away. Also, Jughead has been friends with Betty and Archie since they were kids. But Betty was always way closer to Archie than she was to Jughead. The fact that Betty didn’t know when Jughead’s birthday was or has never met Jughead’s father before merely proves that Betty didn’t have that same history with Jughead than she did with Archie. Barchie having a more authentic history and a more inseparable bond than Bughead definitely establishes them as superior and instantly puts them on a level above Bughead. Affirmative, Bughead knew each other as kids, and they invariably have some history, but it’s nowhere near as strong as Barchie’s history. Barchie secures a lifelong bond and meaningful connection that is so much stronger, undeniable and deeper than anything Bughead ever has. Betty knows Archie way more and much more in-depth than she knows Jughead. Betty can read Archie like a book, and she comprehends him the most out of anyone, including Jughead. And the same is believed the other way around. Archie correctly understands and knows Betty way better than Jughead intimately. He perceives how she operates, how she ticks. He knows how to make her happy naturally, or how to make her mad or how to make her upset. Archie encourages all of Betty’s buttons, whether they be positive or negative. There’s just so much about Barchie’s superior connection to Bughead’s. You can tell by looking at Archie and Betty and when they interact with each other in scenes that there is so much history, companionship and genuine love there. But when I watch key Bughead scenes, I don’t feel there’s the same depth or history that Barchie have. It is one of the key reasons why I genuinely think Barchie is superior to Bughead. Because of that strong friendship and kinship that Archie and Betty have, they have a substantial basis and foundation for an epic romance in the future. 

Betty loves Archie + has unresolved romantic feelings for him: Come on guys. There’s undoubtedly no possible way that Betty doesn’t have some unresolved romantic feelings for Archie after all this time. It is the girl that spent the majority of her life loving Archie in secret, fearful that if she told him the truth about how she felt for him that it would change everything between them. Betty most likely felt that if she expressed to Archie her genuine feelings about him and that she cherished him romantically that it would end up destroying her friendship and relationship with him. Going by what happened in the pilot episode, she was somewhat precise. When Betty finally gained the courage to tell Archie how she felt for him, Archie freaked out. Archie didn't expect the girl that had been his best friend since childhood, the girl that he had been next door neighbors with since the tender age of 4 years old, would ever have felt so deeply for him. When Archie told Betty that he couldn’t be with her and he adamantly rejected her after her love confession, Archie stated that his apparent reason for being unable to be with her at that key moment in time was because he felt he wasn’t good enough for someone as perfect and amazing as her. Betty was heartbroken by Archie’s conscious rejection, and she didn’t take it too well at first. On top of it, she was seriously envious of Archie and his attraction to Veronica. Here’s the key thing: there is undoubtedly no possible way that Betty Cooper has stopped loving Archie Andrews. THERE IS JUST NO WAY. Nobody loves someone for that long and so deeply and merely forgets about that person or about appreciating that person. You don’t just stop loving someone like that especially when you treasured them so much for so long and have been naturally through everything together with them. There is no doubt in my critical mind that Betty still has overwhelming feelings for Archie, but she has allegedly placed them on the backburner for Archie’s sake. Betty moved on from Archie so fast, and she moved on with Jughead, but that doesn't mean she has stopped loving Archie because she hasn’t. Do you understand how I know? Because every important time that Betty is in Archie’s vicinity and presence, Betty cannot stop smiling and beaming with happiness. Whenever Betty is around Archie, she glows. She beams with genuine love and fierce pride when she looks wistfully at him. She inevitably delivers him this different sort of smile that’s for him and nobody else. Now, that’s not to say that Betty doesn’t love Jughead. Of course, she does (and I say that as someone who hates them as a couple and doesn’t ship them at all.). But, it doesn’t alter facts. Betty is still in love with Archie. She hasn’t dealt with those unresolved feelings for Archie that she has felt since she was a child. You can’t completely expect me to believe that Betty has lost all the romantic feelings that she had for Archie and has entirely moved on with Jughead, because I don’t buy it. The reason why I nevertheless think that Betty is in love with Archie is because of the lack of chemistry, romanticism and passion between Jughead and Betty. Bughead is together, but something is undoubtedly missing. I feel like Betty is solely using Jughead as a replacement or placeholder for Archie. She is projecting the kind of passionate romance and relationship that she genuinely wanted with Archie onto her relationship with Jughead and it shows. Do I genuinely think that Betty loves Jughead? Sure. But I don’t necessarily think it’s a passionate, romantic love. I think Betty wants what she feels for Jughead to be romantic love, but it isn’t. Whatever she feels for Jughead is a comforting illusion. She’s in love with the fundamental idea of Jughead and loving him. She doesn’t love him the way she loves Archie unconditionally at all. As long as Archie is nearby, Betty will inevitably have those lingering feelings for him. That’s never going away. Betty can attempt all she wants to abandon whatever she felt for Archie, but a love like that never fades. And I think deep down, Jughead sees it. Otherwise, why would Jughead always act so insecure regarding Betty and Archie? Why is he always suspicious and self-conscious? Why did Jughead tell Betty that he knows she is with him until Archie realizes his feelings for Betty to which Betty would have no issue discharging him for Archie? Because it’s an essential truth. Betty would throw Jughead in front of a Mack Truck if Archie reciprocated even 5%-10% of Betty’s romantic feelings. I can never accept Bughead for this particular reason, and I can never ship them for this very reason. I can’t just brush aside 10+ years of complex history between Betty and Archie. I can’t just brush aside the fundamental fact that Archie and Betty naturally have this strong, deep and undeniable bond and established a connection that has been formed and developed since their childhood. I can’t just brush aside the fact that for 10+ years, Betty loved Archie so much and wanted to be with him. How am I to willingly accept Bughead when all these harsh facts remain a genuine reality? I can’t just accept Betty loves Jughead more than she does Archie because it’s just not the case. She doesn’t, plain and simple. She thinks she does, but that’s because as of now, Betty is settling for Jughead because Betty knows she can’t have Archie. Archie is currently emotionally unavailable because he’s been in a relationship with Veronica for two seasons now. And the objective truth is, Archie genuinely loves Betty deep down too. He doesn’t acknowledge it or wants to comprehend it yet. He doesn’t want to accept the fact that he loves Betty because he has such a strong sense of self-doubt and self-hatred. He thinks himself as imperfect and indecent, not good enough for the suitable girl next door Betty. But what Archie doesn't realize is that loving Betty and accepting that he loves Betty is his journey and path to self-acceptance and most importantly, to self-love. Archie won’t learn to appreciate and accept himself until he sufficiently learns to love and willingly accept Betty. And this is precisely why Barchie will happen naturally and why I sincerely believe they will end up together in the ultimate end. Case in point, Betty still loves Archie, and that will never change, no matter how hard the writers try to revise history to rewrite things. 

Bughead is a cliche relationship: Bughead is typically such a cliche type of relationship. Ordinary girl next door falls for the edgy boy from the criminal side of the tracks? The reasonably popular girl falls for the loner boy who is anti-social and doesn’t fit in with the norm? Cheerleader falls for the weirdo? Their relationship is the epitome of a cliche. Bughead’s relationship is nothing new. I have seen this type of relationship many times in fiction, and it’s nothing exciting or unusual. Now, I’m not saying that any of the other relationships on Riverdale aren’t cliche in their way. Barchie could equally be considered to be cliche as well. The girl next door (Betty) falling passionately for the boy next door (Archie)? Cliche. The cheerleader (Veronica) undoubtedly falling for the popular football player (Archie)? That’s equally cliche. The industrious poor, loner boy (Jughead) gradually falling in love with the beautiful, popular rich princess (Veronica)? Yep, that’s cliche too. It’s not about the critical fact that Bughead is a cliche; it’s how they are written that bothers me. Bughead is written as a cliche teenage love. It lacks considerable depth and profound significance. I feel like Jughead and Betty just jumped into a relationship out of desperation. Many high school relationships typically happen on impulse, and Bughead’s relationship represents impulse. Bughead is a cliche relationship because it lacks excitement. Their specific dynamic is nothing original. They are from opposing sides of the spectrum socially and economically. Betty is the wholesome, cheery, upbeat girl next door and Jughead is the intense, brooding, melancholic loner. To me, Bughead reeks of the second coming of Dan/Serena (Derena) from Gossip Girl. Dan was traditionally a loner and social outcast from Brooklyn. But he craved to be romantically involved with Serena, the lovely, popular girl from the Upper East Side of Manhattan, from afar. It’s a similar situation with Jughead and Betty. Jughead is the loner outcast from the Southside who experienced an infatuation towards Betty, the sweet, girl next door from the Northside. Boring. Not only is the fundamental dynamic between Bughead been seen in many forms of modern media over the established decades, but the substance (or lack thereof) of Bughead’s relationship is what causes them to be incredibly cliche. Their relationship is extraordinarily shallow and hollow. They are acting out a typical high school teenage mini-drama. They are consistently fighting, then breaking up, then fighting again, then breaking up again, and then getting back together. Now that Bughead is seemingly past that specific stage of competing with each other and breaking up and then getting back together in a vicious cycle, their complicated relationship has presently become a cliche bore and dullard. In season 3, the writers have written themselves into an obscure corner where Bughead is concerned. It’s like they don’t recognize what to do with this couple anymore except continue composing them as the same, cliche, dull investigative couple/duo that they’ve been for the past two seasons now. Bughead is cliche and is a typical high school relationship because their relationship is based precisely on puppy love and foolish infatuation. Bughead is already acting like they are going to be together forever and are going to get married and it’s all great rainbows and unicorns. EH, WRONG. Bughead naturally has the same mentality that the considerable majority of all first love relationships and high school relationships have in common. They retain this sense of idealism in their minds when it comes to their relationship. Bughead is not based on realism and reality. It’s base on an elaborate fantasy. Jughead and Betty are only 16 years old, yet they are acting as though they are 40 and married. They are moving too much like an elderly married couple. Jughead and Betty seem to think they are set in The Notebook. They seem to lost in their world, and they don’t realize everything else around them. That is what traditionally makes Bughead an unrealistic, shallow, typical teenage high school relationship. It is why Bughead won’t endure or make it as a long-lasting romantic union. Because like I said in a previous point, Bughead is a first love, but it’s not a true love. Bughead and their relationship are nothing special, outstanding, epic or extraordinary. To me, they’re just another cliche good girl/edgy boy couple that many young females within society like to live out fantasies. They are just another accurate representation of what high school love, first love, and teenage relationships are. Bughead is cliche as hell.

FP & Alice (Falice) had romantic + sexual history: Are we just going to overlook the fact that FP and Alice had a romantic fling back in high school? Are we just going to brush aside the fact that FP and Alice not only hooked up in high school but they, also, produced a long lost son together? It appears as though history is replicating itself with regards to the Jones men hooking up with the Cooper women. In the present. For all one knows it’s merely me, but I find that history is repeating itself romantically and sexually between the Jones and the Coopers very unsettling, bizarre, gross, and weird. It naturally makes Bughead look borderline incestuous. Because of FP and Alice’s fling back in high school, they had a son together, which means that Jughead and Betty share a half-sibling. That traditionally makes the whole web between the Jones men and Cooper women even grosser and disgusting. It’s indeed strange, and it doesn’t sit comfortably with me that Jughead's father and Betty’s mother experienced an affair with each other back in high school and now, the kids are emulating their parents. I don’t know about you, but if I found out that my mother and my boyfriend’s father were hooking up in high school and it resulted in a teen pregnancy where my boyfriend and I share a long-lost sibling, I don’t know if I would want to continue having a romantic relationship with my boyfriend. It would just creep and weird me out. It’s not an ordinary circumstance at all. Then again, we have traditionally seen this same story play out on another famous teen drama show, Gossip Girl. Dan and Serena were conventionally dating each other, but it was revealed that Dan’s father Rufus and Serena’s mother Lily were in genuine love back in the day and that they allegedly had a complex affair. Like FP and Alice, Rufus and Lily had a long-lost son together whom they gave up for adoption. It’s like RAS, and the contributing Riverdale writers just stole that storyline straight out of Gossip Girl and implanted it right into Riverdale. It’s unoriginal. It is one of the biggest reasons why I’m turned off from Bughead. The fact that Jughead and Betty’s parents have an intimate and romantic history, I can’t get past that because it makes Bughead and their relationship weird. To make matters worse, FP and Alice were seemingly hooking up and dating each other in the present while their kids are also currently hooking up and dating in the present. Weird, weird, weird. Did I mention weird? The writers went as far as to sufficiently emphasize and highlight the direct parallels between Falice and Bughead and that history was replicating itself during a season 3 episode (3x03). The writers and the show purposely showed FP/Alice in bed together in one scene and then switching to the following scene with Jughead/Betty together in bed. IT’S GROSS! It made me feel very uncomfortable, and I know plenty of other viewers who mentioned that they felt just as weirded out, disgusted, and embarrassed as I did with the way those scenes were shot. Bughead is pretty much incestuous and taboo for me. Yes, Bughead isn’t blood-related at all, but it doesn’t change that they look and act like step-siblings who are forcing an intimate connection between them. Now, if I had to choose between Falice or Bughead existing or continuing their romantic relationship in the present, I would indeed rather see Falice stay together romantically than Bughead. After all, Falice was undoubtedly canon first, and Bughead is merely trying to be an inferior imitation and knockoff of their parents. Bughead is emulating Falice so hard, but they are desperately failing miserably. Bughead doesn’t have anywhere near the complex history, essential development, or passionate chemistry to be anything remotely comparable to Falice and their complicated relationship, past and present. 

Bughead erases Jughead’s sexuality: Honestly, this reason doesn’t bother me that much, and it’s not a huge reason why I don’t ship or like Bughead. But I know there’s a small yet vocal part of the fandom that it does bother greatly. According to quite a few vocal people, Jughead is asexual in the classic comics. Now, I’ve read the comics since childhood, and I can confirm and attest that in the older version of the comics, Jughead isn't asexual. In many of the past comic book storylines, Jughead has shown a romantic interest in some girls, and he has been fascinated with women at various points throughout the history of Archie Comics. He was merely written as misogynistic and as someone who didn’t think highly of women in general, but that didn’t make him asexual or aromantic. Jughead’s first love was traditionally considered to be food, but that didn’t mean he didn’t have some romantic interest in girls because he most definitely did. There have been numerous storylines of Jughead showing romantic interest in girls and even being written in romantic relationships with female characters, like Ethel and Veronica for example. The exclusive version of Jughead that is canonically confirmed to be asexual is in the recent Archie Comics 2015 reboot. I know some people who hate Bughead are upset that the show writers of Riverdale erased Jughead’s sexuality from the current version of Archie Comics. But I can suggest the argument as to why RAS and the writers wrote this. Jughead Jones is thoroughly known to represent a popular, well-liked, beloved character within the Archie Comics franchise. Carefully add to the fact that Cole Sprouse, a well-known, famous teen heartthrob for many juvenile girls and young adult women, is portraying him. As a direct result, the female viewing audience who eagerly watch Riverdale want to see the “heartthrob” who they crush on, adorn, fawn over and heartily admire, be in romantic relationships with a female character(s) on the show. That way, these adolescent girls and young adult women can live their erotic and sexual fantasies vicariously through that particular relationship. That relationship currently happens to be Bughead. Why do you genuinely think that Bughead is (or used to be, shall I say politely) popular and well-liked in a fandom primarily dominated by young teenage girls and young adult women? Because they assuredly find Cole Sprouse attractive, hot, sexy, cute and appealing and they want to witness him get romantic or sexual with a female on-screen. I recognize why the writers changed Jughead’s sexuality from that point of view. But at the same time, I understand why a vocal part of the Riverdale fandom is greatly disappointed, angry or upset that the writers chose to neglect asexual and aromantic representation on a popular teen television show. Originally, Cole Sprouse argued for his distinctive character of Jughead to be canonically asexual on the show, and he genuinely wanted Asexual!Jughead to remain a reality. He argued for it because he required representation, but that was at the beginning of the series. Right now, Cole supports Straight!Jughead and his specific character being in complex relationships with attractive girls. Cole likely changed his mind about this key topic, because he is “dating” Lili Reinhart off-screen and his character Jughead is dating Betty onscreen. Jughead not being written as the same sexuality as he was in the recent version of the comics doesn’t bother me too much. That may be a controversial thing for me to admit, but for me, that’s my opinion. Sure, it would have been tremendous to have some representation for that group because there is accurately zero of it in modern media. But the erasure of Jughead’ sexuality from the comics isn’t my most fundamental issue or concern regarding this ship. I don’t hate Bughead because it erases 2015 Comic!Jughead’s sexuality. I’m okay with the modern Riverdale version of Jughead being heterosexual and straight and into girls. Jughead’s unique character is prolifically and accurately described as an "emo heartthrob", so he is bound to be attracted to girls and have girls be attracted to him. The principal reason I hate Bughead is because it naturally lacks organic chemistry, proper development and creative originality. I hate Bughead because it’s poorly composed and usually forced. I hate Bughead because it’s a toxic piece of waste. Not because it erases accurate representation. But at the same time, I’m compassionate and understanding to those who hate Bughead because it does delete adequate representation and that’s okay too. It’s just not my reason for disliking this ship.

Bughead is too codependent: For all one knows it’s just me, but I find Bughead’s relationship codependent, especially in season 1 and 2. I feel like they lack an identity apart from each other and that’s not a good thing. An essential part of what makes them unhealthy and toxic is that Betty has become so dependent on Jughead, especially after Archie rejected her. It’s like she turned to the next boy that gave her attention and just fell hard and fast. And Jughead was just a lonely outcast who was desperate to be loved and accepted. Here comes the first person outside of Archie to give him any genuine affection and considerable attention and Jughead got too attached. Bughead’s complex relationship became significantly codependent in season 2. Betty wanted to be with Jughead so much that she was ready to willingly give up her identity and her individuality to be a part of Jughead’s cruel world as a Serpent. Jughead told Betty about entering his world and how dangerous and unpredictable it could be, but Betty was still persistent in wanting to be a Serpent. To prove how much she wanted to be with Jughead and be a part of his world, she got undressed in front of an entire bar full of adult and older Serpents AS AN UNDERAGED GIRL. Jughead was horrified when Betty carried this act out that he reluctantly decided to break up with her. Jughead didn't want Betty to be an active part of his chaotic world, and he informed her many times. But Betty’s codependence and neediness towards Jughead undoubtedly caused her to lack logical thinking. And now at the end of season 2, Betty becomes Serpent Queen and integrates herself into Jughead’s world of being a Serpent when it doesn’t flatter her whatsoever. Betty is not a Serpent. She’s not born into that unpredictable life. By becoming Serpent Queen, she essentially gave up her individuality and her identity to be with Jughead. Betty is a Northsider through and through. She will never under no circumstances be a Southsider. The fact of the matter is that Betty only joined the Serpents because she is Jughead’s girlfriend. Betty doesn’t genuinely care about the well being of the Serpents. She hasn’t achieved anything great for the well being of the Serpents. She only associated with them because of nepotism and her boyfriend Jughead being the Serpent King. Betty has no place in the Southside Serpents, and it’s abundantly apparent. It is what makes their relationship codependent. Without Jughead, who is Betty Cooper? Who would she be if Jughead broke up with Betty for good? Who would she be without him? A key reason for Betty’s strong codependence on Jughead naturally has to do with the fact that Betty isn’t mentally healthy. Betty suffers from an undiagnosed mental illness that has yet to be candidly acknowledged and adequately addressed on this show. My guess is Betty has undiagnosed Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Those who suffer from BPD have serious abandonment issues and attachment issues. They latch onto anyone who will willingly give them love and devoted attention because they are so needy and starved for attention and enthusiastic approval from others. And Jughead happens to be Betty’s effective drug for her BPD. Instead of seeking specialized help for her mental illness, Betty used Jughead as an emotional crutch to cope. Toxic, toxic, toxic. Let’s not forget that Jughead is equally using Betty as an emotional crutch as well. Jughead has consistently been the lonely, outlasted loner who never fit in. He was bullied growing up and constantly picked on. Jughead is dependent on Betty as a way to undoubtedly make him feel accepted into the social norm especially because of the complex environment he grew up in which was a toxic one. For Jughead, Betty is a form of escapism. Escapism from his dysfunctional life and the negative environment that he has with his family at home. In an undeniable fact, I argue persuasively that Jughead and Betty’s relationship is all about escapism. They are using each other to escape from their reality, but they want to escape for different reasons. Betty is using Jughead to escape from her mental illness, her troubled family life and the pressure of having to remain the perfect faithful daughter all the time. Jughead is using Betty to escape his unhealthy, toxic, dysfunctional home life and his insecurities that he feels about not being good enough. It makes Bughead’s relationship codependent and needy in essential nature, and that’s why they are problematic. Not merely does the fact that Bughead’s relationship being based on escapism causes them to be an unhealthy, codependent relationship but also that both of them constantly break up and then get back together so fast. It genuinely seems that they don’t take time away from each other to be by themselves. They consistently have to be together and getting involved in things that could coax them into a boatload of trouble. If Betty gets prominently involved with something, then Jughead typically has to get involved. If Jughead gets involved in something, then Betty naturally has to get involved. And all that undoubtedly does is lead to more frequent problems. I feel because of their codependent relationship, Jughead and Betty have either grown stagnant as characters or have regressed as characters. They haven’t changed for the positive, and they haven’t evolved in a way that is beneficial for both of them. Their codependent attachment to each other has ceased them from exploring other relationships with people and branching out by communicating with other people besides each other. It’s like Jughead and Betty live in their little world, their little bubble and that is unhealthy. Outside of Archie, Veronica and Betty, who does Jughead undoubtedly have to consider a friend? The Serpents aren’t his friends. They are his subordinates. He is their leader, not their friend. Outside of Betty and the Serpents, Jughead doesn’t have much of an identity, and that is a problem. It's the same for Betty. Outside of Jughead and occasionally Veronica (not in season 3), Betty is barely seen communicating with anyone else. It’s like her friendships with notable people like Kevin, Veronica, and even Archie (Archie for God’s dear sake, the boy she has cherished and known intimately since childhood, has been next door neighbors with, and has been best friends with since she was a child!) have ceased to exist. Jughead is all that matters to her now. It’s depressing. Betty is lonely, and she doesn’t realize it because she doesn’t acknowledge anything or anyone else besides Jughead and her relationship with him. Bughead and their relationship are incredibly isolating. Jughead and Betty have secluded themselves away from others and the potential for generating wonderfully new bonds and enduring friendships outside of each other. Does Betty possess any friends outside of Jughead right now? I mean, seriously, her budding friendship with Veronica has grown so distant as of season 3. She barely acknowledges her anymore. At least Jughead willingly spent some decent time with Archie during this season and aided him in the running away from a demolished town of Riverdale and escaping the wrath of Hiram Lodge. And Jughead is gradually but surely starting to develop a bond and friendship with Veronica. But Betty? She willingly has no one. She’s so isolated and lonely outside of Jughead that the sole person that she is turning to other than Jughead is her serial killer father, Hal! And that’s just a grim reality. For Betty and Jughead to grow tremendously and evolve organically as complex characters, the two of them need to break up and invariably find themselves on their own. Because right now, Bughead’s codependent relationship has caused Jughead and Betty to become severely stagnant.

Bughead is an emotionally abusive relationship: This may be considered to be a controversial opinion, but I genuinely think that Bughead is an emotionally abusive relationship. I undoubtedly noticed visible traces of emotional abuse within Bughead’s relationship throughout season 1 and season 2. Whenever Jughead and Betty would argue fiercely and fight doggedly, Jughead would habitually be the likely one always to take personal digs/attacks and make nasty insults about Betty. He would berate her and insult her all the time like sarcastically calling her the “perfect girl next door” (as if it’s something that is so horrible). Jughead would yell at her for doing nice things for him (like throwing him a birthday party). He would throw her feelings for Archie in her face. It made her feel guilty for loving Archie because he’s insecure regarding Archie and Betty’s relationship. Jughead and Betty would constantly harbor secrets and lie to each other for God knows what reason (this shows a huge lack of trust and honesty in the relationship). These represent unmistakable signs of an emotionally abusive relationship yet for some strange reason, and fandom never addresses it. Most of the fandom is “Awww, BUGHEAD FEELS!” when they see Jughead and Betty in any scene together, but they don’t realize the toxic and unhealthy aspects of their relationship. They believe that because Jughead and Betty look “cute” together and act all lovey-dovey and couple-like that all is healthy and okay with their relationship, But they divert a sightless eye to how much underlying emotional abuse and unacceptable toxicity exist in the Bughead relationship. 

Bughead look + act like siblings: I can’t get over how much Bughead look and act like brother and sister. Conceivably it’s because that is their relationship in the comics. But they don’t appear as a romantic couple to me. When they get intimate and sexual, it looks very incestuous. Jughead and Betty’s parents experiencing a romantic history emphasizes the incestuous aspect of the Bughead relationship. Let me gently remind you that if FP and Alice ever got married in the foreseeable future, Jughead and Betty would be step-siblings who are in brotherly love and dating each other. It is just shameful and bizarre and cringe-worthy. Let’s not forget that in real life, Cole and Lili look like they could be related or that they could be brother and sister. I know Cole has dyed his hair black for his role as Jughead, but Cole is a natural born blond. Lili is, also, a natural born blonde. Jughead and Betty would appear to be more like siblings than they do if Cole kept his original hair color of blond. If you don’t believe me that Cole and Lili legitimately look like they could pass as brother and sister, then just put a candid photo of Blond!Cole next to Lili and see how much they indeed physically resemble each other. Jughead and Betty’s relationship is just way too platonic and sibling-like for me to believe they have any romantic chemistry. Bughead’s sex scenes look like a brother and sister getting it on. For example, the first time when Bughead got physical in 1x13, it was just so awkward and non-sexual. It looked extremely sibling-like and incestuous, and it looked like two siblings having a secret affair in their trailer park. Yuck. The second considerable time that Bughead gets physical in 2x12, it appeared non-sexual and incestuous. Again, there was no sexual and romantic chemistry during their first time. The distinct lack of fierce passion and romanticism in Bughead’s relationship is the most substantial reason why I genuinely feel Bughead acts like a brother/sister type of relationship rather than a romantic, intimate one. Falice having sexual and romantic history plus Bughead sharing a long-lost sibling doesn’t help Bughead look any less like an incestuous brother/sister relationship.

Bughead is constantly trying to fix each other: I hate how Jughead and Betty are repeatedly trying to solve and fix each other’s problems. That’s not how healthy relationships work. In season 1 alone, I unquestionably felt that Betty was intentionally trying to fix Jughead properly. I felt like she was trying to mold Jughead into who she wanted him to be. I don’t feel like she fully accepted him for whom he was. Much of her relationship with Jughead in season 1 was her projecting her profound feelings for Archie onto Jughead. Jughead comes from a highly dysfunctional family and unfavorable environment. Betty saw Jughead as a project that could be fixed so she could feel better about herself. That’s exactly how I see Betty’s relationship with Jughead. I feel like she is constantly mothering him instead of being an actual supportive girlfriend. And Jughead genuinely seems to enable this mother type attitude in Betty because Jughead has serious unresolved mommy issues. After all, Jughead’s mother Gladys up and left and abandoned him to an extremely troubled household with an alcoholic deadbeat father. Betty, being the perfectionist and fixer that she is naturally, obviously fell for Jughead because she identifies with someone that is emotionally unstable due to his horrible upbringing. She knows he is poor and has serious family issues. For Betty, fixing Jughead is undoubtedly an effective way for her to feel better about herself because she battles serious self-esteem issues. She constantly experienced the standard pressure to be the faithful daughter, an excellent student, and a beloved sister, and this was the pressure that was eagerly pushed upon her by both of her willing parents Hal and Alice. I feel like since Betty constantly tries to fix Jughead’s fundamental problems, she promptly loses her independent identity to him in the process. In season 2, Betty fixing Jughead’s problems is even more obvious than in season 1. Betty is so adamant on fixing Jughead and earnestly trying to get him to overcome his difficult issues that she is intent on joining the Serpents and being passionately involved in the gang lifestyle. Betty’s reasoning for wanting to be a Serpent was so she can be with Jughead and watch out for him. I understand that she wants to be a so-called supportive girlfriend, but her wanting to be part of a gang lifestyle, something that she never grew up in and a life that is so unpredictable and dangerous, was just such a stupid and reckless reason. Even Jughead had to push back at Betty and inform her that the Serpent life wasn’t meant for her. The reason why Betty is always trying to fix Jughead and his problems is that she’s not satisfied with the person that Jughead is. If she loved and accepted Jughead for who he is, then she wouldn’t be trying to change him and solve his issues all the time. The other notable time when Betty tried to fix Jughead’s longstanding problems was when Betty decided to blackmail and manipulate Cheryl into lying under sacred oath about FP covering up the murder of her deceased twin brother Jason. Betty was so desperate to clear her boyfriend’s convicted father so that he would receive a lighter prison sentence and punishment for his crime. Betty did such a horrible, sinister and devious act by blackmailing a traumatized girl for her gain just so that she can be seen as a super good girlfriend who’d do anything for her boyfriend. On the reverse, Jughead also tries fixing Betty’s issues as well. Such as the case when Betty and her family found themselves in a crisis when Imposter Chic murdered someone right in the middle of the Cooper House. Jughead ended up committing a punishable crime by covering up murder evidence that belonged to the dead man so that the local authorities wouldn't catch Betty and her family for their crime. Not only that but because Jughead was trying so hard to fix Betty’s problems, he got his criminal parole father involved in the mess. I don’t know about you, but if I were Betty, the last thing I would want is for my longtime boyfriend’s father who had scarcely got out of prison, is for him to be involved in covering up a second dead body. I wouldn't want to involve my boyfriend's parole father so that he risks being arrested and going to jail once again for knowingly committing the same crime that burdened him in prison in the first place. Though Jughead has intentionally tried to solve Betty’s problems, there is one important issue in which Jughead has completely neglected when it comes to Betty: her mental health. For some reason, Jughead can fix and solve all of Betty’s obvious issues, but he can’t even convince her to get the mental help that she needs. Alternatively, he chooses to either brush it under the rug or enable it by advising her that everything is going to be okay because he’ll be there to support her. I’m not asking for Jughead to directly fix Betty’s mental health or cure her mental illness, because nobody is capable of doing such a thing. But what he should be doing, as any good boyfriend would typically do, is convincing her to get mental help for herself. I don’t want Jughead to fix Betty’s mental health because no one reasonable person can fix people’s mental illness. But what he can undoubtedly do is adequately communicate with her and talk intimately to her about her mental health issues. What he can do is demonstrate to her some tough love and sincerely convince her to stand up for herself and voluntarily seek the valuable help that she dearly needs. But Jughead hasn’t done that at all. He’s merely nudged Betty’s mental health to the side as if it signifies nothing. Jughead and Betty can fix each other’s external problems, but the one thing they consistently fail at doing is being a healthy and proper support system for each other without the need to fix and mold one another into who they want each other to be. That is conditional love, not unconditional love. 

Bughead has too much jealousy and insecurities: I genuinely think that Betty and Jughead undoubtedly have too much jealousy and insecurities in their relationship. These key issues with jealousy are highlighted in season 1 and season 2. Jughead is constantly insecure about Betty’s relationship and mutual feelings for Archie. It’s like it was habitually in the back of his mind. When Betty and Jughead get into a fight in 1x10, Jughead even lashes out at Betty about her ambiguous relationship with Archie. He notifies her that she is only with him till Archie reciprocates her feelings romantically. The fact that Jughead assumes this shows that he has some serious insecurity issues concerning Archie and Betty’s relationship. Jughead also showed jealousy when Betty and Archie exchanged Christmas gifts with each other in 2x09. He could see that Betty and Archie had that special connection that he didn’t have with Betty because Betty was so sure that the present she received was from Archie. Jughead knows deep down that Archie and Betty naturally have this powerful and deep connection yet he intentionally tries to conceal it and conveniently ignore it as much as possible. That is until Betty and Archie share moments right in front of him and then he allows his jealous and insecure side to come out. When Jughead finds out that Archie and Betty exchanged a kiss from Cheryl, Jughead doesn’t take it too well. He gets so upset and resentful over it that he possesses a desire to get back at Betty and Archie by kissing Veronica. The fact that he was willing to get back at Barchie for kissing each other showcased his insecurities regarding Archie and Betty’s relationship. If he were secure in his relationship with Betty, he wouldn’t require the need to resort to such a petty move. The fact of the matter is he wanted to get revenge against Archie and Betty, and he even admitted it as much. He told Betty that he enjoyed seeing the look on Archie’s face when he was kissing Veronica to get back at him. Pure jealousy and pettiness because he’s uncertain about Archie and Betty kissing, even when the two of them were broken up at the time. Jughead revealed some jealousy in a recent season 3 episode (3x10).  Archie told the rest of the core four at Pop’s that he would have a hard time studying for the SAT’s because he may have to repeat his academic Junior year due to having been through so much that year. Betty supported Archie and advised him that she would happily help him study and promptly let him catch up. Jughead had a bitterly jealous look on his face when Archie and Betty were talking about investing time together, and Betty was talking about tutoring Archie as she did for him back in grade 2. Jughead is desperately insecure with Archie and Betty just being friends and helping each other. That is how much he knows that he is in Archie’s constant shadow where Betty is concerned and he has been so since childhood. The fact is Jughead has always been jealous of Archie deep down because Betty has always loved Archie and showed him more attention than him. It’s stated as much by the writers who recently confirmed it (though I’m skeptical because I genuinely feel like much of Bughead’s relationship is retcon and a revision of history.). Jughead has always felt second best to Archie especially in regards to his friendship and emotional bond with Betty, and it’s been repeatedly sprinkled throughout the show so far. I think deep down, Jughead knows that Archie and Betty have such a deep and intimate connection and that with time, they will eventually consummate that connection. It’s only a matter of time. Jughead can see that Archie and Betty share this unique bond that he will never share with Betty and that brings out Jughead’s insecurities. Jughead can deny it deep down all he desires, but he completely knows. He knows by heart that what Archie and Betty naturally have is special and that one day, Archie is eventually going to open his eyes and realize that Betty is the chosen one for him. But for now, Jughead tries turning a blind eye to it because he wants to have faith that his relationship with Betty will survive through it all. But with considerable time, Bughead will founder, and nothing will stop Barchie from getting together down the continuous line. At this specific point, it is inevitable, and Jughead even said as much in 2x08 when he narrated the memorable Barchie scene with the both of them looking wistfully at each other through each other’s windows. But not only does Jughead battle jealousy issues in their relationship. Betty has shown some jealousy issues where Jughead is concerned. The times when Betty had demonstrated jealousy and insecurity regarding Jughead was when Jughead was acting genuinely friendly with Toni. In 2x11, Jughead and Toni were working collaboratively on a school project together, and when she instantly saw Jughead and Toni together, she immediately got suspicious. It is part of the reason why Betty was so hostile towards Toni at first because she was self-conscious about Jughead’s friendship and bond with Toni. Betty harbored insecurities where Jughead and Toni were concerned because Toni, unlike Betty, was from the same world as Jughead. Both Jughead and Toni were undoubtedly kindred spirits because they were both from the Southside, both poor and both have a direct Serpent lineage. These striking similarities between Jughead and Toni automatically made them compatible and right for each other (this was before Toni got with Cheryl and confirmed that she liked both guys and girls). Betty naturally viewed Toni as a potential threat to her relationship with Jughead because Toni was traditionally from Jughead’s complex world and Betty was not. That is where Betty’s fierce jealousy regarding Toni and Jughead exists. Generally speaking, Bughead merely possesses too many insecurities regarding their relationship. The fact that Jughead and Betty get so easily insecure and jealous when someone of the opposite sex develops some mutual bond or meaningful relationship with either of them shows a distinct lack of mutual security in their relationship. 

Bughead lack solid communication: A fundamental problem that I naturally have with Bughead’s relationship is precisely the fundamental lack of effective communication in their relationship. They are always lying to each other and keeping secrets from each other, especially dangerous secrets that are critically important. Bughead has issues opening up to each other when it is most significant for them to do so. The remarkable lack of direct communication between both of them is one of the most substantial reasons why their relationship is so toxic, especially in season 1. Betty has knowingly lied to Jughead numerous times and has deliberately concealed valuable secrets from him. Some of the necessary things that Betty has knowingly lied to Jughead about or kept from him prominently include her struggling with mental illness. She steadfastly refused to tell Jughead that she passionately kissed Archie. Betty didn't tell Jughead that she was webcamming online with unusual men. She didn't tell Jughead or let him know she had every intention of joining the Serpents and going through the Serpent initiation of stripping on stage (Jughead ended up completely blindsided when Betty stripteased on stage). Betty didn't inform Jughead about her presumed long lost brother Chic and how dangerous and suspicious he was. She didn't notify Jughead that the Black Hood was threatening and blackmailing her into hurting her loved ones against her will intentionally. Betty refused to tell Jughead that she was privately working with the Black Hood and assisting him in causing destruction and chaos in Riverdale (She told Archie and Veronica about her working with the Black Hood before she confessed to her boyfriend!). Additionally, she didn't tell Jughead that she was a direct accomplice to murder when she sent Imposter Chic to his death by luring him to the Black Hood so that he could personally assassinate and murder him (This means Betty was okay with someone being killed in cold blood even if they were a bad or evil person.). In contrast, Jughead isn’t always honest with Betty either. He didn’t tell Betty that he kissed Toni and sort of hooked up with her after they broke up. He withheld the critical fact that his father was a Southside Serpent from her which would have introduced much unnecessary drama to Betty’s life. He hasn’t told Betty about the vital fact that he kidnapped and tortured Tall Boy and then covered up his murder after Fangs accidentally shot him dead. He wasn't upfront with Betty about him playing Gryphons & Gargoyles at first. He was willing to steadfastly maintain his active involvement in the complex game a well-kept secret from her. There’s way too many unnecessary lies and deep secrets between the two of them. Secrets and extremely detrimental and terrible lies in nature. The fundamental fact that Jughead and Betty constantly feel they can’t talk about the critically significant things or gloss over their key issues is a red flag for the longevity of their romance. A beneficial and stable intimate relationship typically involves effective communication, trust, and straightforward honesty when it matters most, and unfortunately, Jughead and Betty fail spectacularly to perform all of those critical things properly. In this season (season 3), I find they are slowly growing removed from each other which is naturally causing them to lack communication even more. Periodically, I don’t feel that Bughead communicate enough that I conveniently forget they are a couple or are in a relationship. They are acting like two distinguished strangers who don’t recognize each other. That’s how separate their relationship has undoubtedly become this season. Season 2 had them continually lying to each other and keeping secrets from each other, but season 3 typically has them barely talking or properly communicating at all. When they have communicated this season, it usually results in a climactic fight or a possible argument of some sort. I genuinely think the fundamental fact that Jughead and Betty’s social communication is weak is a visible sign that their relationship is on borrowed time. 

Bughead shares a long-lost sibling: This key reason merely makes Bughead look like a disgusting and gross relationship. Are we just going to forget that FP (Jughead’s father) and Alice (Betty’s mother) gave birth to a long-lost child together in high school? It means that Jughead and Betty share a half-sibling/half-brother. It immediately makes their relationship very awkward and weird. Bughead is already incestuous enough as it because they act suspiciously like brother and sister and don’t have romantic chemistry/sexual chemistry, to begin. But the fact that Falice experienced intimate history together and had a child together makes Bughead even weirder. Falice’s illegitimate deceased son and Bughead’s half-brother Charles is supposedly dead because Imposter Chic allegedly murdered him. Even if Charles happens to be dead, it doesn’t change that Jughead and Betty still share a brother and that it nevertheless makes their relationship borderline incestuous. I’m sorry, but if I found out that my longtime boyfriend and I shared in common a half-sibling, I don’t know if I could maintain a romantic relationship with my boyfriend. I would be disgusted if I acknowledged my parents and my boyfriend's parents were hooking up! Jughead and Betty’s father and mother hooking up and having a sexual history and currently revisiting that romantic and sexual history is bad enough. But the fact that Bughead shares a sibling makes it so much worse, and it doesn’t sit right with me at all. If Falice gets appropriately married in the possible future, Bughead would be traditionally step-siblings who share in common a half-deceased brother and are in a romantic relationship. That’s just odd.

Bughead doesn’t exist in the comics: Bughead has never been in the source material of Archie Comics. It is a significant reason why I hate this couple. There has under no circumstances been any romantic implications between Jughead and Betty in the comics. Jughead and Betty experience a strictly platonic relationship in the comics, and he's never shown any romantic interest in her whatsoever. Alternatively, Jughead has proved to be typically a generous supporter of Archie and Betty being together. Yes, that’s accurate. Jughead is undoubtedly the most prominent Barchie supporter in the classic comics, and that’s the proper way it should be typically. Jughead continually provides Betty kindly advice on how to win Archie over and persuade him to select Betty over Veronica. Jughead constantly encourages Betty to pursue Archie doggedly and has never had any interest in considering a romantic move on Betty whatsoever. Bughead as a romantic relationship does not and never has existed in the Archies Comic universe from what I recognize. And for that exact reason, this is why Bughead is considered to be unquestionably a fanservice ship. Jughead has traditionally had more romantic moments with Veronica in the classic comics than he has had with Betty! For some apparent reason, the prominent writers of Riverdale persistently refuse to have Jeronica experience more meaningful interaction and scenes together, despite their relationship being way more emphasized and iconic in the classic comics than Jughead and Betty’s. Bughead being canon on the show is utterly disrespectful to the source material of Archie Comics and even more insulting that the contributing writers voluntarily chose to erase the classic and iconic love triangle between Archie/Betty/Veronica just so that they can typically force Bughead on us. Just nope.

Jughead becomes unlikeable because of Betty: In season 1, I loved Jughead’s unique character. But as soon as he instantly got with Betty, he typically started to slowly become one of the most unlikeable characters on the show. I instantly saw rare glimpses of his unlikeability in season 1 when he was typical with Betty. When Betty threw Jughead a birthday party, Jughead lashed out and acted like a complete jerk. Affirmative, Betty should have told him beforehand that she wanted to arrange him a party instead of blindsiding him, but he still shouldn’t have reacted so harshly towards her. Despite Jughead’s periodic outbursts towards Betty and generally acting cold, icy and aloof towards most people, I sincerely liked Jughead and undoubtedly found him a decent character. Come season 2, and Jughead’s distinctive character became increasingly annoying and intolerable. I’m not going to instantly put all of the blame on Betty and Jughead’s relationship with her for him becoming increasingly annoying and unlikeable, but she is partly to blame for his fundamental change in personality. In season 1, Jughead demanded nothing to do with the Serpents. He proclaimed he wanted nothing to do with the Serpents so much that he didn’t have a good relationship with his father. Jughead would have rather been homeless than be undoubtedly like his alcoholic father. But then suddenly. Jughead genuinely wants to be a Serpent so bad and enthusiastically embrace his family legacy. It was like a polar night and day switch in personality. He went from being someone who was repulsed and turned off by the Serpents to genuinely wanting to be an active part of the Serpents and advocating for them so hard. And the remarkable thing is, I genuinely feel like Betty fed into Jughead’s negative Serpent addiction. She enabled his earnest desire to all of a sudden be a Serpent. Initially, Betty would be against Jughead being a Serpent but turns out that she wasn’t against it at all. By contrast, she was fine with her longtime boyfriend being undoubtedly in an organized gang and endangering himself even further. She was fine with Jughead eagerly embracing his historical Serpent legacy that Betty herself wanted to be a part of the complex Serpent world. She enabled Jughead becoming a Serpent. Jughead choosing to join the active gang voluntarily was precisely his informed decision, but Betty helped to influence him even more and enable him to become a Serpent. Essentially, Betty enabled Jughead to experience a dangerous lifestyle that could cause him so much trouble and danger instead of advocating for him to live a much safer crime-free lifestyle. It is possible it’s just me, but since Jughead has become a Serpent and even more, a Serpent King, Jughead has become very unlikeable and irritating as a character. Throughout the second half of season 2, I found Jughead increasingly annoying. He came across as very aggressive, intentionally mean and a cowardly bully. I especially hated his treatment of Veronica and how he talked down to her and mistreated her for her family’s crimes. Jughead was always the one who would proclaim the kids are not their parents. Adequately, if that were the case, why didn’t he give Veronica the benefit of the doubt and apply that same philosophy to her? He's becoming more aggressive, volatile and confrontational. In season 3 as Serpent King, he has become drunk and eagerly consumed with power. He has let being Serpent King and being an elected leader make his ego grow out of excessive control, and now he’s resorted to ill-treating his subordinate Serpents. He’s been a horrible leader so far and has proven he’s not meant to be King. Jughead had no issue with voluntarily leaving the Serpents high and dry and struggling financially. I genuinely understand that Jughead was helping his best friend Archie escape from Riverdale and the wrath of Hiram Lodge. But he doesn’t enjoy the luxury of doing stuff like that now that he’s Serpent King. He has responsibilities that he must tend to and dependent people to protect. That is precisely the whole point of being an effective leader and a King of a gang: caring about your needed people and subordinates. Season 3 has proven that Jughead is two types of leaders. Either he's a brutal, tyrannical, dictatorial, power-hungry, aggressive, and controlling Serpent King towards his subordinates and treats his underlings with disrespect and unfairness. Or he’s a weak, wimpy, irresponsible, spineless, and careless Serpent King who doesn’t take his responsibilities seriously enough and doesn’t seem to give a shit about his subordinates. Jughead, so far, has proven he is unlikeable as a Serpent and even more unlikeable as a Serpent King. With regards to Betty, Jughead humbly asking Betty to be his beloved Serpent Queen is undoubtedly just all distinct kinds of ridiculous. She does not deserve that honorary title. She is there because she is Jughead’s longtime girlfriend. She isn't earning that title through what she has done for the Serpents. It’s sheer nepotism because she is dating the Serpent King. The fact that Jughead allowed her to become the Serpent Queen is pathetic and sickening. If anyone should be given the title of Serpent Queen, it’s Toni Topaz. After all, the Southside Serpents are her family, and her family was the one who originated and founded the gang in the first place. It's Toni's legacy, and it's in her blood, even more than Jughead.  In addition to proving to be a horrible friend, boyfriend,  and leader, Jughead has showcased high key hypocritical behavior. He constantly criticizes Hiram Lodge and the Lodge family for being a family of petty criminals when his family is also criminals similar to the Lodges. As Serpent King, he declared there would be no crime tolerated as long as he is King. He had no issue with promptly kicking Toni and Cheryl out for doing something as harmless and stupid as stealing a Glamerge Egg stealthily from someone who has intentionally tried to destroy the Serpents lives (Hiram Lodge) wantonly. But then Jughead commits multiple crimes when he kidnaps and tortures Tall Boy and then covers up the murder of Tall Boy after Fangs accidentally assassinates him. He has allowed the executive power as Serpent King to get to his head and he has become more and more egotistical and full of himself. And Betty being with him surely hasn’t helped matters. She hasn’t been capable of snapping him out of these horrible moments that he’s been having throughout this season. Jughead has been playing Gryphons & Gargoyles, and he has allowed the game to consume him, and he has started to act crazy and brainwashed. But even Betty forewarning him hasn’t snapped him out of it. Jughead has become power hungry, and a tyrannical authoritarian leader of the Serpents and Betty hasn’t been able to temper his ego and his overwhelming power-hungry attitude. He has grown extremely distant from Betty, and it doesn’t even seem like they are even a couple anymore. There are just so many things that have negatively changed in Jughead’s character that I’m certain that the only way to repair Jughead’s character is to break him up with Betty and for him to be single for a while so that he can grow as a person. Jughead’s relationship with Betty has knowingly caused Jughead to become a stagnant character with bad character development. Jughead has regressed as a unique character and hasn’t experienced any positive growth, and at least 80% of the reason for Jughead’s distinct lack of personal growth is overwhelmingly his relationship with Betty. 

Betty becomes annoying because of Jughead: Similar to the previous point, Bughead has also caused Betty’s complex character to be impacted negatively as well. Since getting involved with Jughead, Betty has come to be one of the most annoying and irritating characters. She had been a much better character before she got into a rebound relationship with Jughead. Betty was a decent character in season 1, but she slowly descended into annoying character territory as soon as she jumped into a relationship with Jughead. The fundamental truth is that part of what traditionally made Betty more and more annoying was how much of her unique identity was dependent on Jughead. In season 2, it became pronounced that Betty was starting losing her identity through her relationship with Jughead. Her moral compass also started to become blurred, and she was willing to bend the rules and her morals for Jughead, something that is not okay. Such a prime example of Betty doing something immoral in the name of Jughead is when she severely threatened Cheryl and blackmailed her into lying under oath at FP’s criminal trial about FP covering up Jason’s brutal murder so that he would improperly receive a lighter prison sentence than he deserved. Betty blackmailed Cheryl to commit deceit or else she would expose the video of her father Clifford murdering her beloved twin brother Jason on the internet and everyone would know about it. The fact that Betty was willing to efficiently conduct such an evil, sinister and immoral deed all in the name of saving Jughead’s convicted father from receiving the prison sentence that he deserved for committing a crime of covering up murder showcased that Jughead is merely such a bad influence on Betty. As we all know, Betty battles a sinister side and suffers severe mental health issues that she has repeatedly ignored and refused to face and acknowledge. Jughead possesses a habit of bringing out Betty’s darkness and enabling her mental illness. When Betty was misbehaving and dressing up in BDSM clothing during a foreplay session with Jughead in 2x14, Jughead didn’t even flinch or show concern. He indeed enjoyed it and relished in it, and it was just beyond disturbing. Another key thing that bothered me was how Betty was so desperate to be with Jughead that she was willing to give up her established identity as a Northsider and promptly become a Southside Serpent. Jughead had informed her that he didn’t want him involved in that life because of how dangerous it is yet she persistently refused to listen attentively to him and his legitimate concerns. Betty got on a grand stage and started stripping in front of a local bar of old men as an underaged girl. It was just so inappropriate, and this was when I started to dislike Betty and realize just how much of a toxic influence Jughead and his environment have on Betty. Also, since getting with Jughead, Betty has become increasingly mean spirited and self-righteous. She adopts a terrible attitude and feels like she can merely talk down ton people whenever she wants. The unreasonable way Betty treats Veronica and talks down to her is downright disgusting and unacceptable. She has gone out of her way to humiliate Veronica repeatedly publicly, and I feel like Jughead plays a part in that because Jughead has always had a grudge against Veronica and her family. Jughead’s self-righteous and arrogant attitude, especially throughout season 2, strongly rubbed off on Betty and it showed in how Betty talked to people and treated others. Jughead and Betty together were highly annoying and unlikeable throughout season 2, and I couldn’t stand them and how they acted up. With Jughead, Betty seems to have a superiority complex which causes me to want to punch her in the face. She thinks she has the moral high ground when in reality, Betty has become one of the most morally compromised characters in the show since she got with Jughead. Betty has showcased that she is also very hypocritical. She is willing to commit immoral, illegal and criminal activity herself knowingly and is perfectly okay with Jughead committing immoral and criminal activity because they naturally think they are doing it for the right thing. But God forbid someone else does something wrong or something traditionally considered to be illegal, and all eternal hell breaks loose, and Jughead and Betty suddenly have something to declare about it. Betty called Veronica out for being a spoiled wealthy girl with corrupt daddy issues. Also, she called Veronica, a bad girl because of the harmful things her wealthy family does. It makes Betty pathetic and hypocritical. When she made those offensive comments to humiliate Veronica publically, she lacked self-awareness in addition to being a hypocrite. Because the truth is, Betty is also a spoiled, privileged girl with serious daddy issues and with a serial killer father and a cruel mother. Not to mention that Betty has committed more crimes and broken the law way more than Veronica ever has. Therefore no, Betty doesn’t claim any right or moral high ground to criticize Veronica and humiliate her constantly for things that her criminal family commits. Because Betty is more morally compromised than Veronica and it’s not even close. Not only do I believe that Jughead exercises a profoundly negative influence on Betty’s personality and he enables her darkness, but he also isolates Betty. It genuinely seems that since getting with Jughead, Betty has isolated herself from her other friends. We barely witness her communicate with anyone else other than Jughead. To Betty, it seems that Jughead is all that matters to her. That causes Betty to appear as unfriendly, aloof, unapproachable and unlikeable. Like Jughead, Betty has morphed into a loner, and it’s very unhealthy. Betty was way more sociable and friendly before she got with Jughead and it’s just sad that her relationship with Jughead has knowingly caused her social life to take a serious hit and deteriorate so badly. Betty has inevitably lost her likability and her identity because of her relationship with Jughead. Jughead has made Betty very unlikeable, and that is why it’s so hard for me even to support her or like her anymore. Like I mentioned above, the sole way for Betty’s character to be redeemed is for the writers to break Betty and Jughead up. Betty needs to be single for a while and to undergo some character development on her own without the urgent need of a boyfriend. I do ultimately desire her to develop a romantic relationship with Archie sufficiently but truthfully; she doesn’t deserve Archie with who she currently is. She’s way too screwed up to be with anyone in a relationship right now. Betty needs to be getting help for her mental health. She needs to be resolving her family issues. She needs to get some self-esteem because I honestly don’t think she has any. And most of all, she needs to get the hell away from Jughead. He is just bad for her on so many levels. Betty would be way more likeable, and a more admirable character without Jughead and that is the truth. Jughead is a major influence and apparent reason for Betty’s ultimate downfall as a decent character. Simply disappointing. 

Jughead is second best to Archie (when it concerns Betty): Let’s confront the facts here. Betty has been in unconditional love with Archie, and she always will be. That will never change. I don’t care how much she proclaims that Jughead is this impressive boyfriend and epic love (which he’s not). Betty loved Archie for so long and for her to merely disregard her feelings for him makes absolutely no logical sense to the storyline. We at present know that Jughead has felt second best to Archie since they were kids. Jughead felt that Archie was typically the more brilliant kid, the more popular kid, and Betty cherished him. Jughead has always felt second best to Archie, and honestly, that will never change. In the back of Jughead’s conscious mind, he feels insecure next to Archie and even more now than when they were kids growing up together. Archie has everything favoring him. He’s well-liked, he’s a natural-born leader, good-looking, charismatic, get all the attractive girls, he’s a talented athlete and a local star. Plus there’s inevitably going to be that critical fact that since childhood, Betty loved Archie before she barely looked Jughead’s way. Despite receiving the girl, Jughead must know that deep down, the most significant reason why he indeed got the girl in the first place is that Archie rejected her because he didn’t think he was competent enough to be with someone like her. It’s not like Betty naturally chose Jughead over Archie because she didn’t. Betty never got the chance or the ample opportunity to do so. Betty loved Archie for years, Betty told Archie how she genuinely felt, Archie totally freaked out and instantly rejected her, Betty was naturally forced to move on no matter how much Archie’s rejection hurt her. Allow me to spell it out one more time: Betty Cooper never chose Jughead Jones over Archie Andrews. Alternatively, Betty Cooper settled for Jughead Jones because she couldn’t have Archie Andrews. Archie has consistently been Betty’s first choice period. Do you genuinely think that is somehow going to change even though Jughead and Betty are currently in a relationship? Nah. One memorable day, Betty will willfully choose Archie over Jughead. It’s only a critical matter of time. Because deep down, Betty loves Archie and constantly has and always will. Betty will uncover her eyes once again and realize that Archie is the one that she belongs with and that she was merely projecting what she desired to possess with Archie into her relationship with Jughead. And yes, as a direct result of Betty’s unresolved feelings, Jughead will end up feeling second best to Archie once again just like he typically did when they were kids. Jughead will end up undoubtedly hurt and left behind like he did when Betty, Archie, and Jughead used to hang out during their childhood. The truth is Betty is settling for Jughead because Archie was unavailable to her. Poor Jughead. 

The classic, iconic love triangle (between Archie/Betty/Veronica) needs to be explored: The classic, iconic love triangle between Archie, Veronica and Betty is the most important storyline of Archie Comics. The fact that the writers believed it would be a brilliant idea to erase this aspect of the comics on their show adaptation is one of the worst writing decisions ever. If you’re going to make a show off an adaptation from a novel or comic book, at least make sure that you include the most compelling storylines and plot from the source material. Otherwise, what is the point of making a TV adaptation if you’re not going to respect the source material? The classic love triangle between Archie, Veronica and Betty is undoubtedly the whole point of Archie Comics. For the prominent writers to erase this key aspect and force Bughead as the main couple on the successful show, an odd couple that doesn’t indeed exist in the classic comics in the first place, a huge insult to the Archie Comics franchise. One of the fundamental reasons why I began watching this show in the first place is to see the iconic love triangle unfold between Archie, Veronica, and Betty. When I initially saw the show and the Pilot, I genuinely thought that was what we were allegedly going to receive throughout the series. But it proved to be a massive disappointment. They erased the triangle and forced Jughead and Betty into an unusual relationship. It merely makes no sense for the plot and the show. The sole reason why Jughead and Betty got together and for pure fan service reasons. Jughead and Betty are undoubtedly in no proper way romantically involved in the Archie Comics. They are strictly platonic friends, and I expected them to have the same dynamic on the show. Betty has always been in love with Archie and has never expressed a romantic interest in Jughead in the source material. Betty not being in passionate love with Archie and pining for him goes willingly against everything that Betty Cooper is popular as a unique character in the classic comics. Archie’s primary storyline is constantly being torn between Betty and Veronica, especially in the Archie Comics (2015) reboot. That is typically Archie Comics. The love triangle between Archie, Veronica and Betty are so timeless and classic and iconic that it’s the first key thing I naturally think of when I think of Archie Comics. This love triangle is one of the classic and oldest love triangles in modern media. This ongoing love triangle between Archie, Veronica and Betty and the compelling storyline of who is Archie inevitably going to choose: Betty or Veronica? has been going on for nearly 100 years! How do you produce a show based on Archie Comics and erase such a crucial plot point and storyline from the source material that you are adapting? It doesn’t generate any sense. It is why I don’t like or properly respect Bughead. Bughead should have never happened romantically on the show. It ruined or lowered the chances of the classic love triangle from being explored. Before being a Riverdale fan, I’m undoubtedly an Archie Comics fan. The contributing writers completely shit all over Archie Comics by not including the love triangle. Hopefully, the writers stop writing fan service and produce the show the way it’s supposed to be written. I sincerely hope that eventually, the writers diligently pursue the love triangle between Archie, Veronica, and Betty. Otherwise, what was typically the essential point in creating Riverdale in the first place? RAS and the Riverdale writers screwed up big time and merely made a critical writing and administrative error. And because of that, it’s no wonder the show has gone sideways, and the plot and storylines and characterizations of the comic characters are completely over the place. They neglected the one crucial piece of the Archie Comics material, and that is the classic love triangle. Shame on the contributing writers for reluctantly forcing Bughead, a useless ship that is undoubtedly non-existent in the classic comics, and shamefully neglecting and conveniently ignoring the love triangle between Archie, Betty, and Veronica. I don’t want to watch two boring, stale couples of Bughead and Varchie (AKA the Core Four) be all happy and lovey-dovey and act like they are elderly wed couples in high school. NO. I want complex drama. I require the exploration of creative relationships. I want fun and wild excitement. I want breathless suspense. The forced pairings of Varchie and Bughead do not provide me that, and it has strongly diverted me as a loyal viewer of Riverdale. Without that iconic love triangle from the classic comics, the show is going to become stale and boring very quickly. We’re in season 3, and the show already has become stale because of the boring, forced chemistry-lacking couples of Bughead and Varchie being constantly shoved in our grave faces and screaming hysterically “We’re endgame!” so early in the series. Where is the genuine excitement and legitimate interest in that when couples are already declaring their endgame and meant to be together so early in the series? That’s a huge executive writing mistake to put together those kinds of lines and dialogue in a show that’s a teen drama with romance. People are getting bored, and it’s showing in the ratings and in the reviews. Promptly give me the classic love triangle which is supposed to be traditionally established canon on the show and quit writing fan serviced garbage that is forced AKA Bughead and Varchie!

Bughead lacks sexual attraction and romanticism: Bughead doesn't appear to be a romantic enough couple because I find they lack sexual attraction and romanticism in their relationship. I know they have had romantic scenes and sex scenes on the show, but for some reason, there is no spark there. I feel whenever I'm viewing Bughead having a romantic scene or sexual scenes, it’s forced and they act like platonic friends who are intentionally trying to push a romantic connection that isn’t there at all. It is possible it’s the lack of chemistry between the two characters or even more, the two actors (Cole and Lili) but something is entirely missing. With the way that Jughead and Betty look at each other or act around each other, I don’t feel the sense that they are sexually or physically attracted to each other. They never gave each other those kinds of intriguing and passionate looks or glances. They don't have looks where there is complete and total desire or aching or desperate longing to be with each other. I’m uncertain if Jughead is physically or sexually attracted to Betty whatsoever. Affirmative, Betty is an attractive girl, but I don’t think he’s romantically attracted to her as he wants her. I think Jughead loves Betty, but I don’t think he lusts for her. If I accurately compare the way Jughead looks at Betty to the way he looked at Toni or especially Veronica, you can tell the difference. I see the physical and irresistible attraction between Jughead and Veronica. Jughead even admits he is physically and sexually attracted to Veronica in a recent season 3 episode (3x12). Jughead comments on Veronica’s physical beauty and her good looks, calling her “a hell of a good looking one” and “pretty girl.” It is an indication that Jughead holds an attraction towards Veronica. I haven’t heard Jughead express how beautiful or hot he thinks Betty is. I haven’t seen the desire that Jughead is supposed to have for Betty. At this moment in time, I’m not asking for Bughead to be a lustful, all sexual relationship. But the fact that there is little to no sexual or romantic attraction in their relationship leads me to believe there isn’t any sexual tension there. Not only do I think that Jughead isn’t sexually attracted to Betty, but I don’t think that Betty is sexually attracted to Jughead either. I do believe Betty is physically/romantically/sexually attracted to Archie in a notable addition to harboring an emotional attraction to him. That’s where Barchie is superior to Bughead: they have sexual attraction, romantic attraction, and emotional attraction. Bughead is dearly missing the romantic and sexual attraction aspects of their relationship, and that is why they lack organic chemistry. Sure they may have an emotional attraction, but that’s not enough to keep the relationship going. With Bughead, I merely don’t feel like they represent an amorous couple because they lack that romantic spark and desire. It produces an incredibly dull, non-romantic relationship. 

Bughead acts too much like an old married couple: The indisputable fact that Jughead and Betty are already working as though they are a wedded stable couple is pathetic. They are only 16 years old, yet they are acting as though they have been married for 30 or 40 years! They are just teenagers, and I don’t find it realistic for a couple to be that serious so fast at such a young age. Technically speaking, Bughead is typically the first love, teenage relationship yet they intentionally try to act like they represent a mature adult relationship. it doesn’t make sense, and it’s unrealistic. A romantic couple of 16-year-olds pretending they are lawfully married is not what teenage romance is and it’s not what typically happens in the real world. Jughead and Betty need to act accordingly like teenagers in a relationship, not two 50-year-olds who have been married for decades. Because of Bughead acting so mature for their age and acting like an elderly couple already, their relationship is very dull, stale and dry. There is little excitement and enthusiasm in the relationship. When you’re 16, and in a relationship, there is drama, there’s chaos, and there are ups and downs. A typical teenage romantic relationship doesn’t act as though they have been wed for 30 years, have a lively bunch of kids with a beloved dog, and a beautiful big house and white picket fence. It’s unrealistic, and it instantly makes Bughead look like a practical joke. The writers made a dreadful mistake making Bughead look like some old, mature couple because it just doesn’t suit two 16-year-old adolescents. For this reason, I can't take Bughead seriously.

Sprousehart is a PR or publicity couple: My final reason for disliking Bughead undoubtedly has to do with Sprousehart AKA the real-life “relationship” between Cole Sprouse and Lili Reinhart who portrays Jughead and Betty (Bughead). Therefore, it is recognizable for a while now that Cole and Lili are dating off-screen and they are invariably a couple. I know many fans in the Riverdale fandom are convinced that these two are the real deal and that they are in love and blah, blah, blah. But for me? I genuinely think they represent a fake PR couple. My specific reason for genuinely thinking this is because Cole and Lili have consistently failed to have any romantic or sexual on-screen chemistry as Bughead. If Cole and Lili are dating in real life and are undoubtedly in passionate love, then how come when they are portraying Bughead, they don’t have any personal chemistry at all? Shouldn’t a longtime couple that is dating off-screen be able to play a convincing romantic couple on-screen? Like I mentioned in my previous post, I critically compared Sprousehart to Brangelina (Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie) and discussed the considerable differences between the two couples. I argued Brangelina were able to showcase their strong off-screen chemistry and their off-screen romance on the screen while they were playing a couple in Mr. & Mrs. Smith. However, Sprousehart can’t achieve the same thing as Bughead. This fact has ushered me to believe that Brangelina signifies a real couple while Sprousehart signifies a fake PR couple. Let’s not forget that the CW Network genuinely seems to specialize in aggressively pushing PR couples to reap buzz and dedicated attention and impressive ratings for their ambitious projects. Remember Ian Somerhalder and Nina Dobrev from The Vampire Diaries? They were, also, a fake CW Network couple. Many attractive CW Network couples seem to last three to five years because it’s in their business contract and part of the deal with their management. Once the business contract is over, and the CW Network has successfully received enough buzz, earnest attention and satisfactory ratings for their specific project, then the two principal actors in the CW Network PR couple break up. That is what happened organically with Nina and Ian on TVD. They precisely dated each other for three years and then suddenly, they broke up and undoubtedly had a strange animosity towards each other. I also believe that Chad Michael Murray and Sophia Bush who portrayed Lucas Scott and Brooke Davis on One Tree Hill embodied a fake PR couple and were pushed simultaneously together by the WB/CW Network. That is why their marriage didn’t last because it was a business contract and their characters Lucas Scott and Brooke Davis were dating on their show. Sprousehart is falling into the same category as Nian and Chophia, two popular couples that were passionately loved and adored by longtime devoted fans of TVD and OTH respectively. Also, I have compared Sprousehart to Robsten (Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart) from the successful Twilight film franchise. Many people still believe Robsten were a real couple and that they were in love in real life. But the reality is they weren’t. Robsten represents a PR couple, and they were forced together by their executive management. Rob and Kristen’s rumored romance was to generate attention, buzz, and money for the Twilight franchise and it was abundantly obvious. Once the Twilight movie franchise was over, Kristen was captured cheating with her movie producer, and there were paparazzi photos of her cheating and canoodling with her movie producer which generated a massive scandal. But here’s the thing. Those Kristen iconic cheating photos were all staged. Kristen had those photos taken on purpose so that she could completely “break up” with Robert and get out of her business contract with him. Now that the Twilight movies were over and Rob and Kristen no longer needed to promote their movies, they could do whatever they wanted after getting out of the contract. Once Kristen and Robert were out of the PR contract, Robert immediately moved on with another attractive girl (the British rapper Twigs), and Kristen came out as bisexual and started courting other women. Another comparable couple to Sprousehart? The royal Disney Network couple, Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens AKA Zanessa. They were, also, an exceedingly popular couple during the days of High School Musical. Everyone in the media was talking about them, and there was much buzz and attention generated around their off-screen romance. I believe Zanessa was a PR couple that was pushed together by the Disney Network. Zanessa dating each other screen and being seen together as a couple in genuine life was about attention, money, and ratings for HSM. Interestingly enough, there is a strong parallel between Zanessa and Sprousehart, and that is both of these “couples” had paparazzi photos of them taken while they were walking together on the beach. Nobody can tell me the photos of Sprousehart on the beach in Hawaii from last year were not staged because they were. They are practically identical to the pap photos of Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens when they were on the beach together. I know I sound like a conspiracy theorist, but there have been too many similarities between Sprousehart and other PR couples like Robsten, Zanessa and Nian. If you don’t believe me about the possibility of Sprousehart being a fake PR/publicity couple, please refer to these articles and they will enlighten you about PR/publicity couples in Hollywood and show business: 1.) https://www.thetalko.com/15-celebrity-relationships-that-were-fake-and-we-believed-them/ 2.) https://www.nickiswift.com/2203/hollywood-relationships-completely-fake/ 3.) https://stars.topix.com/slideshow/15764 4.) https://www.slice.ca/love/photos/celebrity-relationships-that-might-not-have-been-real/#!staged-tom-taylor 5.) https://www.vice.com/en_ca/article/gqy9dy/taylor-swift-tom-hiddleston-pr-relationships-promances 6.) https://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/slideshows/12-celebrity-relationships-were-pretty-sure-are-fake/. The fundamental problem is that so many people fall for these fake PR couples because they can look pretty convincing. Therefore though a  couple may be PR and fake, so many naive people, predominantly young fans of the couple, can’t tell they aren’t a true romance and that they are only together for other purposes that traditionally have nothing to do with genuine love and romance. Now, as to why Cole and Lili are in a possibly fake PR romance? I think Cole is in the romance with Lili because it gives him attention and reignites his fame and recognition amongst the media and the public. Cole is pretty famous already due to his legendary past as an established Disney star/ child star in which he grew up in the limelight. However, being on a popular teen drama (Riverdale) and trying to get his foot back into the acting world and possibly the photography world, being in a romantic relationship with one of his co-stars is a sure way to ignite tons of media buzz along with fan attention towards him. Now, just because I believe Cole is in a PR relationship with Lili for his benefit doesn’t mean I think he’s some super cold, ruthless,  ambitious snake that is merely using Lili for his gain. It’s not to say I don’t think Cole likes Lili as a person but do I think he’s romantically involved with her? No, I don’t. At best, I would say Cole is friends with benefits with Lili, but moreover, I sincerely believe Cole is close friends and co-stars with Lili more than anything else. In contrast, I fervently believe that Lili’s key reasons for being in the PR relationship with Cole are much more ruthless and ambitious than Cole's reasons for being in the relationship with Lili. I genuinely think Lili is dating Cole for considerable publicity, established fame and generous recognition. She's undoubtedly a reasonably new and up and coming actress, and by dating Cole, who is already rather famous already, she undoubtedly gains significant attention and extraordinary popularity through her relationship with Cole. Much of the attention that Lili typically gets in the modern media and amongst the Riverdale fandom is because she is dating Cole off-screen, let’s be honest here. Sure, she commands active support herself, and there are loyal fans who like her for her acting and her personality, but it’s her “alleged relationship” with Cole that delivers that extra bit of attention in her favor. I think Lili sees money and fame where her relationship with Cole is concerned. I don’t necessarily think it's about real love and genuine romance, but more about what Cole can do for her future acting or successful Hollywood career. I harbor a distinct feeling that once Riverdale starts to wind down and comes to a close, Sprousehart is likely to break up and go their separate ways, similar to how Nian on TVD did. That’s because I  think Sprousehart is a contracted PR romance that is being used as an iconic brand to efficiently generate social attention and media buzz for Riverdale to help increase its ratings and earn money. The sad thing is many fans of Sprousehart are naive, teenaged girls who believe that life faithfully imitates cinematic art and that like Bughead, Sprousehart are true love and are traditionally the modern-day epic romance. But grievously, they couldn’t be more incorrect. Now, what I’m stating could all be untrue, but I’m only going by what I’ve observed so far with Sprousehart. It is possible I’m mistaken, and they are genuine, but there hasn’t been enough proof or evidence for me to believe otherwise. I also believe that Sprousehart is severely overexposed and overrated, and they are too exposed to modern media. They are too exposed for an odd couple that scarcely has any unique chemistry. Sprousehart is no Humphrey Bogart & Lauren Bacall or Richard Burton & Elizabeth Taylor. Hell, Sprousehart isn’t even Brangelina. As a result, I can’t understand for the life of me why this “couple” is so overexposed in the media. Sprousehart is overhyped, and because of them, the prominent writers have voluntarily chosen to cater to them and Bughead by writing fan service. The sole reason why Bughead is still together on the successful show is because of Sprousehart, the fake PR celebrity couple. The network and the writers know that they have a huge naive fanbase of teenage girls who worship them, and they know that if they break them up, all hell will break loose on the internet. Bughead and Sprousehart by possible extension will represent the imminent downfall of Riverdale, and it will be undoubtedly those two odd couples that will ultimately be this shows demise. 

Those are all of my reasons for hating Bughead. Now that I have listed all my reasons, you can understand why I believe this couple is the worst thing to happen to Riverdale and why I think that this ship needs to sink fast. Thank you for listening to my Ted Talk. ☮️

[skeetvr]

heyyy  all  !!  i’m  bee  n  i’m  here  with  this  babe  .,,  i’ve  never  played  rita  before  so  i’m  highkey  excited  but  also  b  patient  with  me  pls  while  i  figure  her  out  ??  she’s  a  tricky  one  to  figure  out  ok.

⋅ ◆ ⋆ —  ❛  KRISTINE FROSETH / SHE/HER  ❜   ╱   when  you  think  of  chamomile  tea  steeped  a  moment  too  long,  the  scratch  of  quill  against  parchment  &  a  bit  of  lace  unravelling  at  the  ends,  is  it  RITA  SKEETER  you  think  of  ?  because  i  sure  do,  i  also  know,  for  a  fact  that  this  year  is  rita’s  seventh  year  &  they  have  a  lot  on  their  plate,  like:  alchemy,  astronomy  &  the  school  paper.  boy,  aren’t  they  a  busy  little  SLYTHERIN.  i  sure  would  like  to  know  who  their  life  pans  out,  wouldn’t  you  ? 

BACKGROUND !

rita  skeeter  was  born  to  a  fairly  respectable  pureblood  family  –  from  the  outside,  at  least.  from  the  inside,  they’d  certainly  had  their  fair  share  of  scandals,  but  what  pureblood  family  didn’t  ?  

her  mother  fell  pregnant  with  rita  when  she  was  only  sixteen  years  old,  unmarried,  and  in  her  sixth  year  at  hogwarts.  worse  –  rita’s  father  was  a  halfblood.  knowing  it’d  be  the  shame  of  the  family,  rita’s  grandparents  quickly  pulled  her  out  of  school,  telling  everyone  she’d  now  be  going  abroad  to  beauxbatons.  and  when  rita  was  born,  she  was  passed  off  as  the  second  daughter  of  the  couple  who  were,  in  truth,  her  grandparents,  and  the  sister  of  the  woman  who  was,  in  truth,  her  mother.

born  into  lies  &  deceit  as  she  was,  is  it  any  surprise  rita  learned  to  be  fascinated  by  the  secrets  of  the  world  surrounding  her  ?  she  was  always  a  curious  child,  always  opening  doors  marked  do  not  open  and  asking  questions  that  made  her  ‘ parents ’  quickly  shush  her  &  hurry  away.  she  read  voraciously,  devoured  anything  that  fell  in  her  lap,  from  fiction  to  newspapers  to  tabloids,  and  faithfully  kept  a  journal  of  her  life  in  looping  cursive.

when  rita  was  eight,  her  mother  ran  away  from  home  with  a  squib  wizard.  rita’s  grandparents  forbid  her  to  ever  contact  them  again,  and  told  everyone  that  she  had  died.  and  so  rita  saw  the  ugly  underbelly  of  the  world  at  a  young  age.  and  it  fascinated  her.  no  matter  how  adults  might  pretend  to  be  infallible,  each  one  had  their  own  set  of  secret  shames.

she  was  always  wilful,  always  fiercely  independent.  her  grandparents  were  all  too  happy  to  let  her  take  care  of  herself,  to  let  her  roam  free  as  much  as  she  liked.  and  she  did.  she  enjoyed  being  alone,  being  governed  by  nobody  but  herself.  everyone  shook  their  heads  in  pity  at  her  poor  ‘ parents ’,  so  heartbroken  by  their  eldest  daughter’s  death  that  they  simply  couldn’t  control  this  nosey,  half  savage  child.

rita  was  nearly  a  hatstall  between  ravenclaw  and  slytherin,  sitting  on  that  stool  for  eight  and  a  half  minutes  while  the  hat  debated.  eventually  it  settled  on  slytherin  –  although  rita’s  thirst  for  knowledge  &  learning  would  have  suited  her  well  in  ravenclaw,  her  methods  for  attaining  that  knowledge  were  uniquely  slytherin.

she  started  a  school  newspaper  in  fourth  year  –  at  first  it  was  crude,  nothing  more  than  a  single  piece  of  parchment,  double  sided,  with  hand-scrawled  articles  and  rita  the  sole  journalist,  editor  &  publisher.  but  she  kept  it  up,  and  eventually  it  blossomed  into  something  more,  something  she  could  actually  be  proud  of  creating.

it  really  took  off  in  its  second  year,  after  rita  added  the  feature  which  would  become  its  main  selling  point  –  a  gossip  column.  leaving  nothing,  and  no  one,  out.  rita’s  habit  of  sticking  her  nose  where  it  didn’t  belong  became  simultaneously  her  greatest  asset  and  her  downfall.  everyone  knew  who  she  was,  and  as  much  as  they  pretended  to  judge  her  for  it,  the  newspaper  had  never  been  so  popular.  

rita  wasn’t  surprised.  people  were  never  as  good  as  they  claimed  to  be.  they  were  just  animals,  acting  on  envy  &  lust  &  greed,  and  all  of  the  other  base  instincts  that  were  supposed  to  be  sins.  they  could  go  ahead  &  hate  her  for  exposing  that.  she  didn’t  mind.  she  was  used  to  being  alone.

she  fabricates  articles  from  time  to  time,  but  only  when  gossip  is  running  slow  –  unfortunately,  something  that’s  been  happening  more  and  more  frequently  as  of   late,  as  more  and  more  people  clam  up  the  moment  she  enters  a  room.  oh,  well.  she’s  always  enjoyed  creative  writing,  anyway.

she  has  a  very  cynical  view  of  relationships  –  both  platonic  &  romantic.  she  doesn’t  let  herself  trust  anyone,  and  gives  other  people  reasons  not  to  trust  her.  she  doesn’t  think  she  needs  to  get  close  to  anyone.  and  as  for  romance  –  well,  look  at  her  mother.  how  she  ran  away  with  a  man  she  thought  she  loved,  and  how  it  ruined  her.  look  at  her  grandparents.  sleeping  in  separate  beds  by  night,  keeping  up  a  shiny-perfect  facade  by  day.

rita  isn’t  all  cynicism  and  selfishness,  though.  she  does  have  her  good  qualities.  for  one,  she’s  incredibly  passionate  about  her  courses,  something  that  surprises  a  lot  of  people  who  don’t  regularly  have  class  with  her.  those  who  do  have  class  with  her  are  used  to  her  sitting  in  the  front,  glasses  perched  on  the  end  of  her  nose,  firing  off  question  after  question  to  the  poor  professor.  

she  also  doesn’t  let  anyone  tell  her  what  to  do.  she  is,  and  has  always  been,  stubbornly  her  own  person.  as  much  as  she  may  lie,  she  is  genuine  when  it  comes  to  being  herself.  she  openly  acknowledges  her  flaws,  and  acknowledges  her  strengths.  and  she  doesn’t  let  anyone  else’s  opinion  of  her  slow  her  down.

she’s  had  a  little  secret  of  her  own,  recently.  last  year  there  was  a  rumour  going  around  that  some  gryffindor  was  secretly  an  animagus  –  which,  obviously,  was  too  ridiculous  &  far-fetched  for  even  rita  to  publish  –  but  it  got  her  thinking. 

she’s  been  spending  late  nights  in  the  library,  reading  up  on  the  history  &  technique  of  becoming  an  animagus.  she’s  been  devoting  extra  time  to  transfiguration  with  a  fiery  determination.  the  o  she  got  in  her  transfiguration  owl  wasn’t  good  enough.  she  needs  to  be  better.  she  knows  that  to  try  and  become  an  animagus  would  be  notoriously  difficult.  the  hardest  challenge  she’d  ever  face.

it’s  a  good  thing  rita  likes  a  challenge.

so  that’s  rita:  selfish,  cynical,  passionate,  brilliant,  conniving,  curious,  distrustful,  greedy,  unflinching,  uncompromising,  determined,  resourceful,  honest,  deceitful.  she’s  a  strange  mix  of  contradictions,  but  …  well,  at  least  she  keeps  life  at  hogwarts  interesting.

uhhh  i  don’t  have  the  energy  rn  to  write  up  a  list  of  wanted  plots  but  if  u  wanna  plot,  like  this  or  hmu  !!

[musicarenagh]

It's "Nobody's Business" Who Wallis Falls In Love With

It’s “Nobody’s Business” Who Wallis Falls In Love With

Talented North-London singer, Wallis has dropped this new single “Nobody’s Business” which shows her uncompromising side. She doesn’t need your opinions, but the new song is directed at those who have solely chosen to meddle in her business and affairs. She makes it very clear to anyone who is worried that your opinions don’t actually count, just like a malfunctioning calculator. Wallis…

[daydream-girlmeetslove]

SEASON 2 PART 3

In the previous life, I didn’t know WG is known to be one of the only friends of ED. Funny when you know they are the same person but to the public, this is an odd but unsurprising friendship. Only the sociable and charismatic WG would manage to hold himself in front of a difficult and intimidating (read: uncompromising and unsociable) person like ED. To prevent giving away the fact that ED does not live at his official residence, WG goes through the same secret pathway to reach me. He has the freedom of movement since nobody questions what WG gets up to anyway.

I spent the last life being repetitively saved by WG but I never learned much about his personality. Ironically, he still saves my ass in the form of comforting me every time I am upset and sulking at ED.

ED allowed me out once after I moved to his secret bedroom and I was supposed to bake bread in an empty shop at night. I actually went out excited thinking FOR ONCE, he is finally giving me more important tasks (meaning he is starting to open up to me – I guess I was hopeful to get to know him better) but no. He just worked me like a fool, heavily guarded by his people so that nobody would come in contact with me and I don’t even get to see the recipient of my work. I went home puffed and annoyed so WG had to comfort me and listen to my rant the next day.

They are the same person but they act so fitting of their respective roles – this makes them come across differently somehow. At this point though, neither WG or ED acknowledges that they are one and the same soul so I will discreetly not mention anything of the sort and treat them as separate people. One part of me still fears being suspected somehow.

WG is humorous and witty. He keeps me company with jokes and gentle light heartedness, as he has always done even in previous life, while I do things for ED. His company is what keeps me going throughout this ordeal.

He is such a delight. I learn now that WG is a very popular charming person who keeps friendly relations with everyone – any odd person will still get along with him somehow. That is what’s magical about him.

He is like quiet sunshine dancing around people, and they love being in his company.

He points out the most humorous perspectives of my tasks and makes me feel less alone. He listens patiently and attentively, and he comforts very well.

If ND is his truest unfiltered self, WG enhances his personality and represents all the good and hopeful in him. It is the carefree and fun side of him.

I can understand why ED behaves the way he does too because he went through many tough trials to get to his position today. He holds all the stress and expectations bestowed on him (especially his master’s). He has to keep a brave poker face front. His upbringing is of the coldest and harshest and yet, I realise, he doesn’t succumb to cruelty in his heart. Ultimately he is still that kind person wrapped in many layers of aluminium foil.

The impression and rumours about him being the death ripper is deliberately spread to maintain his reputation and authority so that he can carry out his job without being questioned, WG explains. Fear is an effective tool.

That said, he really did do some cruel things, but not towards anyone undeserving. ED said he would carry his promise to me and he really does spare his enemies no mercy.

As for WG and ED’s friendship, no one questions why WG who is regarded as an upright person would be friends with a morally questionable person like ED. According to the masses, this only furthers the admiration for WG’s charisma. They believe he is the people’s only hope to persuade ED. Hence, when anyone wishes to express anything to ED, they go through WG. In turn, WG holds all the opinions but says nothing ever to ED.

I laugh because do they even need to converse? They are the same person! I think this is a very clever arrangement though. It means WG collects all the unfiltered opinions from public and gets to pry into their intentions without ever rousing suspicion because people willingly consult and blab to him. This would be useful information for ED and this is the secret detailing how ED does his work without leaving any trace.

See, WG is socially competent and maintains firm but friendly boundaries with people. He has a way to not offend people, without being taken advantage. So he somehow gets to take feedback without ever executing it and nobody would hate or blame him for the inaction. People are keen to stay on his good side for his good company. No wonder when he overstepped his authority in previous life, he was able to get things done quite smoothly.

WE is naturally supportive and empathetic towards ED whenever I sulk but doesn’t ever rub me the wrong way. If ED is the epitome of tension and misunderstandings, WG is the bearer of light and understanding. Haha. He would listen to me and gently point out the result of ED’s instructions. He would reason with me that ED’s actions don’t betray his words even though his delivery can lack luster.

How can one person manifest so differently individually… wouldn’t they simply merge somehow? But I digress because they are all valid versions of himself and it seems like each of them are extreme in certain ways. Somehow, his person has split into distinct aspects of his personality based on what he intended to represent in their respective lives.

[leoninapelliolovesconchitawurst]

ENGLISH TRANSLATION (Mandy Pitulle)

FM4 INTERVIEW with TOM NEUWIRTH

https://radiothek.orf.at/podcasts/fm4/fm4-interview-podcast/fm4-interview-mit-tom-neuwirth

Queer visibility also plays a role in the life of Tom Neuwirth, also known as Conchita Wurst. Seven years ago he won the Eurovision Song Contest. In an interview with FM4, he tells us like it is to grow up as a gay boy and experience pride for the first time.

. "Hello Tom, nice to have you here." "Yes, hello, I'm happy to be here." "It's June and that's a very special month for many people. It's Pride month and for queer people it's Pride all year. How are you feeling with that? How is June for you?"

Tom: "It's very special, it's been relatively commercialized in the last few years, which makes it special in another way. It's more visibility than it used to be. Pride has always been" The place to be ", especially when I was 16 / 17. Oh God, that I am now at an age to be able to say that. It was suddenly possible to visibly live out our sexuality, even if it was just being there, to hold hands and to have a save space and to know "Nothing will happen to you". It might sound strange, but being able to be an LGBTIQ person out on the streets was not easy back then and is still not always easy now.

FM4:" On 19th, it is the Rainbow Parade in Vienna. Do you have plans?"

Tom: " Not really concrete plans, but since the lockdown has fallen, we all feel the need to go out and celebrate. That is why the spirit to celebrate that I feel has not necessarily to do with June, but also with the current situation. I will of course be there. After 1 1/2 years where you couldn't see a lot of people and queer visibility has not taken place, I think it is important that we go out to the streets together and maybe come back to the origins of Prides . We noticed that the pandemic was not good when it comes to questioning ways of thinking, to stand up for more equality and that is why it is important to go out "as fabulous as we can".

FM4:"Do you still remember your first Pride and your first rainbow parade? How did you feel and how old were you?

Tom: "At my first Pride, I was with my best friend, Flo. We were 14/15 and told everyone we were in Graz, but secretly drove to Vienna. We then went to trendy scene bars and the rainbow parade and it was the amazing feeling of not having to hide, to not have to expect people to talk bad to me or look at me for walking in the street with my boyfriend. It was an extreme feeling of freedom. It still is a little, I have to say. I always dismissed it when you kiss in public and then get harsh comments. “I couldn't care less.” ...But then you ask yourself “Does that have to be?” “Why do you have to put people in a situation that is uncomfortable in some way. "So this year I am a little more aware of why it is important to have a rainbow parade. The first memories ... it was just Heaven ..You danced, met new people every minute and made out on the dance floor. It was "everything you can ask for".

FM4: "Do you know how old you were?"

Tom:" At my first Pride kiss? 15....*mumbles*...14/15"

FM4: "Nice. You have certainly been to many Pride events. Have you ever been to Prides outside Austria in June?"

Tom: "If you're known in the queer community, people like to book you for Prides. That's how it was for me and it has increased exponentially since the Eurovision Song Contest. One of the most impressive Prides was Amsterdam when I was there for the first time. I didn't know it from Austria when you turn on the TV and the country's TV stations are flagged with rainbow flags and Pride is advertised in the mainstream. Then the canals and streets were full. The whole city celebrated this part of society. The kids were all painted with rainbow flags and these floats that drove through on the canals. It was extremely impressive. And I didn't know that from Austria. With the Europride, that changed. That was extremely cool. You really had the feeling that the whole city celebrated with us. I also think that Vienna has the potential to become a queer Hotspot. Barcelona and everywhere else too, but Vienna has such charm and courage. Vienna is so uncompromising. I love that. Uncompromising in any way and especially with this topic. I think that's cool. I would like it to get bigger in the next few years. It's Pride month and we have so much to offer. From queer history in all museums to theaters and clubs. Lectures, artists ... we talked about queer footballers today ... This city has so much potential.

FM4: You already gave the cue. Queer Visibility. Where does it start and where does it end?

Tom: "That has to be viewed individually. I think, a drag queen, for example, that is activism as soon as she steps out of the dressingroom. For me it is ... well I don't know. I've spent a lot of my life, pushing myself into the hetero norm and I don't do that anymore. So not at all anymore. I'm hysterical and loud and scream and laugh and talk to everyone and wear what I like. I've come to a point where I'm no longer afraid because you think “it has to be like that.” And that's where it starts with me. Everyone should start with themselves. Sometimes I find it difficult because I don't want to ask anybody, “Now be extra bad”. Everyone should be what he or she is. I express myself a lot ... Now I want to say, through my clothes, but that's not true. I'm just uncompromising and try to break the boundaries again and again and make people think. Yesterday we were on the Donaustrand and did a photo shoot wearing black lace underwear. The people who watched, the reactions differed. But they'd go home and say, "Well, I've seen something today ..." And they'd talk about it, it's the first step in a conversation.

FM4:"This month is Pride month. Do you remember the first time you were proud of yourself? That you "owned your space"

Tom: "I think that was already at the first Pride events. Although I still have it. Pride means to me .. that's a power. When many people work together towards one goal. Or something in common ... It has so much power. You are not alone as an individual, you are among so many like-minded people where you have the feeling "I breathe". The visibility. That makes us strong against everything queer people struggle with."

FM4: "You already talked about Vienna. You have been living in Vienna for a long time. But you grew up somewhere else, in Bad Mitterndorf. I checked, it has about 5000 residents."

Tom: "They have grown."

FM4: "How was it for you to grow up as a queer person in the country?"

Tom: "It was a bit ambivalent, I never really held back in my being. I often heard from my mother" You can't wear that now. You can't wear a dirndl or a first communion dress, none of that works. "But I'd always found my ways to portray myself and just did what I felt". On one hand, I totally demanded it, but on on the other hand, it was bad for me to get the attention because it wasn't positive. My parents run an Restaurant and they were a bit dependent on the opinions of their guests. They don't think like that anymore. I am happy about that. To do everything right for everyone is simply not possible. It was this duality of "I am there" and "It hurts" when you are insulted, laughed at. And so many queer people feel like that. And you ask yourself "Why?" For example, if it's a child and the adults react like that. You think "Get yourself together."

FM4: "You said there were painful things. What helped you?"

Tom: "Definitely my friends, but I also loved to go to the attic. I never wanted to work, there were too many people and too close for me ... I told my mother." I'll sew every button on you, but please don't let me work in service." And then I fled to the attic and did everything there. Drew, sewed, danced, sang. I sang out loud because nobody heard it. My Idol: Celine Dion ... high and loud. Of course I had to train that first. Yes, me and my friends. It was always my safe place. It is still like that today.

FM4: "That is also very important to have."

Tom: "I'm also very grateful that I can feel myself and enjoy myself ... not in all situations ... that I can love myself. And I have fun with myself.

FM4: Many queer people have queer role models. That help even in difficult times. Did you have someone there too?

Tom: "The first time to hear" I will always love you "was eye-opening. And the first time to hear" My heart will go on ", I think it was my" queer wakening "and comforting. Power balades, the 90s. .. then I could shout it out. That's why maybe I can let myself go so well when I sing emotionally. Because that was always my outlet and still is today. If I don't sing for a long time, it's still like that today. ..I'm in a bad mood and singing, the bad mood is gone. Singing does something to us ... it's like jumping. You have to grin and get in a good mood.

FM4: When we talk about Conchita Wurst, we also talk about identities and breaking the binary system, which has stood in our way for billions of years. You also show that identities can be fluid and can change and can be many things. Can you still remember when you let Conchita "wake up"? And maybe also when you first appeared as Conchita?

Tom: "The first time was ... now I forgot the club, but it was with the Saloon Kitty Revue. Kitty Willenbruch is one of the most famous burlesque dancers in Austria and I was out in drag once and moderated something. She was in the audience and then asked me whether I would like to present the revue. At that time it was every week, I think, and I said “Yes, I would love to.” And then thought to myself that I shouldn't shave. I look like 12 without beard. I let my beard grow and then the day of the revue came. I love to entertain the audience. I think that's my greatest talent. To be able to let go on stage. First was Starmania, then I finished school, and it was basically my first show business experience again. That's when I noticed. Despite all the worry about whether you can make a living from it, I want to go this way.

FM4: "When you think about your queer future, where are you going? What should change?"

Tom: "It would be nice if at some point no one asks the question," Are you into boys? "Because I think, or in my circle of friends, we sometimes also discuss that. We are just gay and that is totally one-sided and totally restricts you. What if I miss the love of my life, which is a woman. It would be nice if the understanding of the world goes so far that it just doesn't matter. Then we would all be Queer, which we all actually are.

FM4: "A good final word. Thanks Tom."

[plutoswrath]

the mercury signs

 Aries mercury: subjective, hypothetical, intuitive, creative, rapid, motivating, obstinate, direct, impulsive, honest // impatient, not detail oriented enough, too impulsive, too honest, opinionated

‘The burning flames of their thoughts heated up the air surrounding them. It had to happen. Now. These words had power in the way they put them, in the way they spoke them with this strong certainty, even though you knew their decision was paired with a hint of light shallowness. Still, the flames grew with every piece of their mind that came to life.’ 

Taurus mercury: realistic, practical, consequent, slow and steady, deliberate, experience through senses // not adaptive, stubborn, not taking opportunities/ not risking to think about other possibilities 

‘The most soothing voice is comforting you, a voice like the humming of Lorelei, the highest and purest form of sensation at the tip of her tounge and you listen to her for hours. She is true and real, she is slow but thinking through, you can see the glistening in her eyes as she laughs - remarking your great taste in music again.’

Gemini mercury: curious, flexible, unbiased, analytical, systematic, versaitile, quick witted, rather logical, impressionable // easily bored, playing mind games at times, really gossipy

‘Is this mind a blessing or a curse? All these worlds that are kept in their heads, all this information and lightning strikes connect them, sometimes shining bright when one thought travels to another country to visit the other side of the universe. They look up in the air and start brooding but laugh sooner or later afterwards - in the huge repertoir they found the clearest answer to the solution. Really, this mind is fascinating.��

Cancer mercury: nostalgic, subjective, emotional and empathetic, imaginative, intuitive, listeners, easily reads between the lines, helping/caring // too subjective, moody, avoid arguments to the point where it’s unhealthy

‘Hearing her speak is like reading an old novel, an old novel in an open bookshelf that you found near the street. You find old post carts and photos inside of it, people with painfully content faces, now vanished in the worn out process of floating time. Dreams that never got true, the laughing of a family sitting at the dining table, screaming at the moon and every other tear that was drowned in silence.’

Leo mercury: loud, dramatic, positiv, intuitive, clever, creativ, prideful, warm //stubborn, too prideful, intolerant to other ideas/believes, exaggerating

‘He does not plainly speak, he announces, every word is saturated with gold and preach his wisdom, for that he is sharing it with you out of a greater purpose. You will hear him sing and scream and they will laugh and eagerly listen to his stories, for he is known that he has the most exciting stories to tell. If he always sticks to the truth while telling you his glorious tales? Well, he has an creative mind, for sure.’

Virgo mercury: analytical, methodical, realistic and critical, objective, logical, detail oriented, foresighted, organizing/systematical, picky, adaptable // intolerant, to detail oriented, too critical and/or whiny/pessimistic

‘There was a hint of amusement in the eyes of the leutnant. He thought about all the ways he and his soldiers could go, all the failures that lay ahead and all the victories that were made for them. Nobody doubted his cool and clear way of thinking, everybody knew that deep inside of him, there was a complexity of thoughts, like a spider web made out of ice - careful, do not touch it, it’ll easily break if shaken too much, when the wind is blowing at night. But of course, the spider is clever enough to build a better, much stronger web each day.’

Libra: objective, fair, diplomatic,imaginative, indecisive, pleasing, easy going/charming, connective, creative/deep interest in culture // do not adapt very fast, too pleasing/ indecisive, lazy, need to learn how to disagree

‘People want to call them rather superficial, but I laugh at the thought, that people think badly about such a talent. The smoothest, finest words come out of their mouths, answers that combine the most complex and different opinions from both sides of the crowd. Their mind is a bridge, a gateway to another room, where mentally your senses are touched gently and comforting.’

Scorpio: secretive, sharp minded, investigative, deep, nag for superiority, analytical, instinctive, uncompromising and enigmatic, say what they think // the need to be always better, too secretive, interpreting wrong theories, skeptive and negative/pessimistic, say what they think

‘When he speaks it is like the venom of the snake, every little word he shares and scatters makes you eager for more, but still left with nothing relevant as he knows how to play with words. Strong words, the words of a wounded man who knows that there is more to the world as the facade it puts on every day. He knows where your dead bodies are burried.’

Sagittarius: humorous, subjective, open minded, far-sighted, considerate, positiv, honest, look at the bigger picture, philosphical // brutally honest/ rudeness, not detail oriented enough, judgemental, taking things not seriously, impatient 

‘She is laying on an evergreen field in the prairie, with waterfalls that can be heard in the distance. A buzzard draws his circles up there in the sky and not a single cloud can be seen. She inhales and exhales the fresh, clean air. Thinking is freedom. And freedom is to think without limitations, in the most beautiful places that you can imagine.’

Capricorn: clever, clear, realistic, crytical/skeptical, practical, foresighted, sharp, concentrated, reasonable, methodical, cautious and carefully choosing words // pessimistic, too considerate about how they appear to others, moody, judgemental, at times impatient when people do not get their way of thinking

‘Sitting at the desk he releases his last words and formes them to letters that were written on the paper in front of him. Overthinking he scratches his head and bites his nails nervously. Usually his mind flows like a river but now a rainy day surprised him and he can’t see straight. As the clock strikes twelve, he stands up and opens the door behind him. A thousand eyes look up to him, eager to listen. He swallows and crumples the piece of paper into a ball. Now it’s his time to speak.’

Aquarius: analytical, impersonal, rapid, clear, objective, imaginative/visionary, open minded, quirky,  far-sighted and observant //thinks they are superior to others/intimidating, stubborn, love stirring up a conversation to make it more interesting

‘At the highest form it is like a god-like creature speaks to you through his body. His ideas so revolutional, so dynamic, so clear, how couldn’t you see the solution before? It was right in front of your eyes. People will call him crazy, or they will call him a genius. Sadly, it’s not for him to decide.’

Pisces: poetic, empathetic, creative, romantic, sensitive, utopic, trusting, indirect and soft // too indirect, naive, moody, impractical/disorganized, lazy

‘The eyes mirror the words she says, like an elfen creature, she imagines her dreams of a rosy colored glass house, with the finest art in it: her ideal kind of living. Like a sponge she soakes up the vibes in the room, suddenly feeling so highly saddened as she realizes that he thinks, he will never reach his dreams. “But he is a work of the highest form of art himself, how can he not see the beauty I am allowed to see every day in front of my eyes?” - Oh, she will probably keep these words to herself. 

[agentdagonet]

Echoes, Ch. 10

Find it here on AO3

Find it here on tumblr:  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Fic Summary: Feet dangling off the edge of the bed, hands still resting on the earpieces of his glasses, Eggsy opened his eyes.

      And promptly shut them again, screwing them shut like a child who had the distinct misfortune of biting into a raw lemon. Breathing harshly in his nose and out his mouth, trying to stave off whatever delusional panic had befallen him, Eggsy reopened his eyes.

‘Harry?’

Or: The Hologram Story Nobody Asked For

          Eggsy stopped wearing the specs for a bit, after that. The cast came off and PT started for his arm; it was a bitch and a half but it meant he was getting better. That he'd be getting back into the field. But he kept coming back to Harry.           Now that it was shoved into his face, albeit accidentally by what was basically a high-tech ghost, Eggsy couldn't help but marvel that he'd upheld Kingsman tradition entirely by accident. He'd upheld a Galahad tradition in a fit of loss and self loathing. Which in itself seemed to be a Galahad tradition.           He hid the decanter in a cabinet, but it didn't really do much beside leave a hole to remind him of the realisation. A spot where shit's cleaner or something when you move what was there before.

          Eggsy went through the motions of his days much as he had before, but he couldn't really pretend that nothing had changed. On some level (everything I've done has been trying to repay him) Eggsy had always known that Harry still blamed himself for his father's death. No stranger would have reacted to his record so vehemently otherwise- well meaning or not, there'd been honest anger hiding behind his pointed words. The way Harry had always mentioned his dad in passing (your father had the same look on his face) with that melancholy look...           In a strange way, Eggsy was grateful that Harry'd been in a coma for such a large portion of his training. Fuck knew what other unnecessary comparisons he would have made between Eggsy and his dad. Where else Eggsy would have ended up barely more than an echo of his father in Harry's eyes.           Those thoughts were driven from his head as violently and often as he could manage, often with a round or two at the firing range and a stiff drink. With the notable exception of Roxy once betting he couldn't not shoot himself if he was plastered, the two didn't mix- though he couldn't deny that watching Roxy waddle about awkwardly in a set of twenty-five centimetre platforms was totally worth it.

It took a while, but eventually Eggsy put on his big boy pants and sat himself down in front of Harry in the drawing room on a Thursday afternoon.

          'What, no drink, Haz?' Holo-Harry was wearing a cardigan, some dark colour, and holding a book that he'd probably been pretending to read while waiting for Eggsy to step the fuck up and sit the fuck down with him. Not that Eggsy'd been paying attention, or anything.

          'With little exception, Eggsy, relaxation does not require alcohol. Perhaps every once in a while, but if one's immediate association with relaxing is to drink... well, I'm certain we both know where that leads.' The book was closed and placed upon his lap, spine obscured by Harry's forearms resting atop it. 'No, Eggsy, this conversation requires no vice strong as that.           'My name is Harry Hart- my mother named me for her grandfather, Hawkins; luckily without actively providing me with a built in "kick me" sign. My father was not the most pleasant of men, my mother was as well-meaning as she was exasperated with the hand she believed life had dealt her, but betwixt them they had far more connections than any average family ought. Mostly due to the fact that my father's first cousin is a man by the name of Chester King.'

          Eggsy gasped quietly, never having thought he'd one day vaguely regret killing the man. Very vaguely. Like a memory you're not quite sure truly happened or was just a really realistic dream. Or a blurry picture you can just barely make out.

That is to say, not very much at all, but the fact that they'd been related was an unpleasant surprise.           'We never interacted much- our differences in age and politics were a harsh divide- but the connection was there. Many a night I would come home from university to find my father in the sitting room entertaining him, a fair bit of scotch split between two glasses.' Harry sighed, one hand raising to rub at the bridge of his nose, and Eggsy suddenly noticed just how tired Harry looked. 'Contrary to what you might believe based upon this, Chester was not my sponsor into Kingsman. I'm sure you've noticed by now how uncompromising he can be when he has an opinion. And he has many.           'The day Lancelot died, Eggsy, Arthur attempted to make me see how foolish my previous choice of candidate had been. Made a disparaging comment about choosing a "more suitable candidate" and I will happily admit to wanting him to take a long walk off a short pier.' Eggsy snorted a laugh, relaxing despite himself.           'Didn't know you had it in you, Haz.' The nickname was becoming a bad habit, but it wasn't as if Harry were here to correct him.           'I resisted stating as much, but when he tried to make light of your father's sacrifice... I called him a snob, and told him that there was a reason aristocrats developed weak chins. With respect, of course.' Holo-Harry smiled, eyes glazed over as if caught in a pleasant memory, as Eggsy chuckled from behind his hand. Imagining Harry being a shit to his boss was one thing, but having evidence (or whatever the words of a technological ghost were considered) that he actually had been... Eggsy couldn't help but smile fondly at the Harry-That-Was sitting before him. 'I'd have paid to see that.'           'Merlin can likely obtain a copy of that footage- it happened in the Dining Room, certainly not exempt from surveillance. Alternatively, it's also in my personal terminal somewhere, which you have access to as we're obviously interacting at this moment.' 'You was a shit, weren't you, Haz?'

          'I was not always entirely gentlemanly, no- but I knew when to push and when to leave things be. At least, that's what I tell myself when I find I'm in circumstances that could have been avoided by keeping my mouth shut. If I've put myself there, there is a reason and it is worth it. I seldom say much without meaning it.'

          Eggsy was simultaneously elated and despondent, the words having brought two distinct moments to mind, unsurprisingly. I see a young man with potential. (Can't you see that everything I've done has been about trying to repay him?) And which one was the truth, then? Did he go by what Harry had said most recently? Had Harry seen potential in him at first, only for Eggsy to fuck it up by not noticing the blank? Would Harry have ever acknowledged Eggsy's accomplishments as his own, instead of some warped echo of his father's potential?           'But that's getting a bit far from the topic. Which, yes, there is in fact a purpose here, Eggsy. I came to the realisation a few days ago that, for all that I know about you, you don't know that much about me. It's something that would have been rectified with time, had I not ended up in a coma and had actually spent your candidacy conscious and present. Or after you had become Lancelot as I was rightfully sure you would.' There was a now-familiar pang in Eggsy's chest.           'Unfortunately, as we sit here having this admittedly one-sided conversation, it's plain to see that we did not get that time. So, I have decided to impart to you what I felt was worth mentioning here. Certainly an unconventional use of Merlin's technology, but not an immoral one. 'I digress, today I've sat here to tell you about my life before Kingsman- the man behind the mask, as it were.'           'I know enough, Haz- I know you from Merlin's drunken ramblin' and your fucking stuffed dog and the old footage I've been going through on your laptop. Yeah, maybe I added some shit here an' there in my head but I knew you- maybe not as much as I wanted to, or as well, but enough.'           'I met the previous Bedivere by happenstance at one of the incredibly boring functions my father expected me to attend. In retrospect he likely expected me to eventually set aside my differences with Arthur and conform to the conventions of that life- which both happened and didn't.' The hologram continued, luckily not talking through Eggsy but not acknowledging that he had spoken beyond the pause.

          'I went to university to study Entomology, I've always found the process of pinning insects fascinating, and intended to look into museum work. Curating seemed to be as far from the posh life my father wished for me to enjoy, which pleased my rebellious side. It happened that my obsessive knowledge of insects saved Bedivere from something or other- I don't recall the details, it was a number of years ago- and when the Galahad position became available he named me as his candidate.' A slow smirk curled itself at the edge of Harry's mouth, and Eggsy could easily visualise him steepling his hands as he leant forward onto the table. 'You can only imagine the look on poor Arthur's- Lamorak, at the time- face when I won. Unfortunately there is no footage- as ahead of the times as Kingsman always is, there are limits.'

          'I got the feeling it's the opposite of the face he made when I fucked up the last test. Like, he drank half a glass of sour milk and can't bring himself to sick it up, or something.'           'Needless to say it was the highlight of my life until that point. I could probably form a fully corporeal patronus with that alone.' 'You read the Potter books? Thought you was too old for that.'           'Eggsy, you'd be hard pressed to find something I would refuse to read. They were only a global phenomena, and there was a limit to how many "you're a wizard, Harry!" jokes I could take from James before picking the damn things up. Don't let Percival's stoic demeanour fool you- he's just as awful as his husband was. You just don't think he could be the culprit.'           'You sound like a conspiracy theorist- you gonna tell me the moon doesn't exist or something?'           'Fine. Don't believe me. I certainly won't be there to help you undo whatever he decides upon for you. And Roxy's friendship will not grant you mercy. You'll see.'

'Sure, Haz. If you say so.' Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all.

[logh-icebergs]

Episode 18: The Lippstadt Conspiracy

April 797/488. Now that Reinhard’s pick for Kaiser has taken the throne, the oppositional Braunschweig and Littenheim assemble a motley crew of disgruntled nobles to overthrow him and take down Reinhard in the process. Obviously, this goes poorly for them. Before that happens, Hilda takes the initiative to arrange an alliance with Reinhard, firmly positioning herself as the only remotely intelligent noble not already in his admiralty. Braunschweig appoints veteran admiral Merkatz to lead his anti-Reinhard charge; Ferner (unsuccessfully) takes matters into his own hands; and Reinhard, having gotten the jump on Braunschweig, struts around extremely pleased with himself. Annerose, meanwhile, gazes sadly at nothing in particular, and I think Reuental and Mittermeyer are too busy arresting treasonous nobles to go on a date. Oh well.

A few episodes ago, Rebecca introduced some of the less prominent—though still important—characters in the Alliance. Well, the time has come to do the same for the Empire! Episode 18 has some politically important plot stuff, and finally (finally!) properly introduces Hilda, but in terms of hidden meaning below the surface, there’s not much to speak of. So without further ado, I present to you a Who’s Who of some of the Empire’s many side characters (and Hilda)!

Hildegard von Mariendorf

I’ve mentioned Hilda a couple times before, but there wasn’t really any reason to until now, beyond the fact that she’s my favorite character and I love her. Now, we get to spend some much-anticipated quality time with the galaxy’s best and brightest lesbian. I’ll get more into the queerness of Hilda later on, when it’s discussed more directly; for now, let’s take our cue from the show and focus on what she does rather than who she is.

Hilda is the smartest person in every room, especially when that room is a bar full of Imperial aristocrats.

When we first meet Hilda in episode 18, she’s eavesdropping on a bunch of nobles gossiping in a bar about who they plan to support in the upcoming battle for supremacy between Reinhard and Braunschweig et al. Hilda, of course, has already made up her mind, which we see in a flashback to a very recent conversation she had with her father on the subject.

Unlike all the other dads in LoGH, Hilda’s dad, Franz von Mariendorf, is not a piece of shit. He takes his daughter seriously, respects her political opinions, and has no qualms about ceding his family power to her.

The uniquely positive nature of Hilda’s relationship with her dad, like other contrasts and comparisons in the LoGH universe, draws attention to the intentionality of the creative team’s choice to show us so many bad fathers. I’ll be talking about this a LOT more later, so keep it in the back of your mind.

Hilda has (correctly) realized that betting on Reinhard is so safe it can hardly be called a bet, and with her father’s blessing, she arranges to meet with Reinhard himself to discuss terms of a mutually beneficial alliance. Her frankness and obvious political acumen impress Reinhard, who takes an immediate liking to her, accepts her proposal (even agreeing to give it to her in writing, when she pushes him on it), and then leaves to go start the civil war that she predicted.

Did you somehow miss that Hilda is super driven and intense? Her expression here should clear up any remaining doubts.

The most striking aspect of this scene, though, isn’t the political maneuvering—it’s the introduction of the dynamic between Reinhard and Hilda, one of the most interesting relationships in the whole show. Almost right away, Reinhard is caught off guard not by Hilda’s boldness, but by how much he obviously likes her. His invitation for her to dine with him sometime in the future is the first time we’ve ever seen Reinhard take the social initiative with anyone other than Kircheis.

Fun fact, though: The first word that Reinhard ever says to Hilda is actually none other than, you guessed it, “Kircheis.”

As we’ve discussed at length before, relying on heteronormative shortcuts will get you nowhere in LoGH: The mood of this scene, despite containing within it a man and a woman, is as businesslike as Hilda’s uncompromising tone throughout; Reinhard’s interest is, of course, platonic. I love them.

Ernest Mecklinger

As I’ve said, Reinhard/Kircheis and Reuental/Mittermeyer are the two Great Romances of LoGH, so among Reinhard and his admiralty and for the purposes of a queer reading of this show, I’ve been focusing primarily on those four. But the rest of Reinhard’s admiralty is worth talking about too! I’m not going to go through all of them yet, because honestly very few of them make an impression at this point, but I’d like to spotlight a couple (no, not an actual couple, for once) of the more prominent less-prominent admirals who have been adding background color and texture for a while now.

(From “My Conquest.”)

First up, Ernest Mecklinger! Canonically, I think he’s the only one of Reinhard’s admirals who has hobbies beyond “war” and “drinking.” They include: painting, general consumption of the arts, and presumably waxing his mustache. Mecklinger can usually be counted on to be level-headed and generous; he chooses his words carefully, and later on we’ll see scenes in which the only way to describe how he acts is Like A Sweetheart. In the novels, we are told that Mecklinger is nicknamed the “Artist-Admiral” because of how cultured and well-rounded he is.

Fritz Josef Bittenfeld

(From episode 16.)

On the complete opposite end of the spectrum is Bittenfeld, the short-tempered, bombastic commander of the Black Lancers (basically picture the intensity and camaraderie of the Rosen Ritter, except a fleet instead of an infantry unit, and without the long history of defection and betrayal). Bittenfeld has already been the recipient of one slap on the wrist—that would have been a lot more severe if not for Kircheis’s intervention—and frequently gets into trouble for rushing into dangerous situations before he’s fully thought them through, both on and off the battlefield.

Look, I did my best to sum up the differences between Bittenfeld and Mecklinger but I honestly don’t know why I bothered when this one exchange captures them so perfectly.

Anton Ferner

Here to answer the eternal question of “What if Oberstein, but hot?” is Anton Ferner, an Imperial cop who is loyal to whomever he dubs most able to make use of his loyalty. Like Oberstein, Ferner views himself less as someone with ambitions of his own and more as a tool to be wielded by someone more powerful. Also like Oberstein, Ferner has an unsettling air about him, made only slightly less so by the fact that he doesn’t habitually remove his eyeballs (that we know of).

You may remember Ferner from back in episode 9, when he sardonically refused to fire on the suicidally destructive Klopstock because a statue of Rudolph von Goldenbaum stood in his way.

However, whereas Oberstein has an overarching philanthropic goal that drives his utilitarian machinations, Ferner’s only motivation seems to be the joy he derives from serving someone he has deemed worthy. And here we get to the main difference between Ferner and Oberstein (other than their respective levels of hotness): Ferner can, in fact, feel joy! Or amusement, anyway.

Ferner is constantly smirking when he’s been bested in some way; he absolutely gets off on other people being powerful and talented, but again, we’re not here to kinkshame.

After Ferner ignores Braunschweig’s orders, attempts to assassinate Reinhard on his own, and is summarily defeated, he surrenders to Reinhard and offers him his loyalty. Reinhard, never one to scoff at potential no matter how it ends up in front of him, accepts and, appropriately, gives him to Oberstein as a pet.

I’ll bet you thought I was kidding.

Oberstein and Ferner, the creepiest utilitarian weirdos in the galaxy, have found each other at last! I’m sure they’ll get along great; Ferner, at least, will probably think Oberstein’s removable-eyeball trick is hilarious.  

And we must never ever forget that Ferner, according to Matsuri Okuda’s original character designs, started life as a rejected Reuental concept. Which may explain why I think he’s so beautiful.

Otto von Braunschweig (and Ansbach)

Have you noticed that nobody on Reinhard’s team—not even anyone of noble birth—has that awful George-Washington-style aristocrat hair? Even Mecklinger, who keeps his hair long, doesn’t wear it in a ponytail with an enormous bow. My point is that Braunschweig’s hairstyle, which is hideous, is also a good indicator that he is evil, or at least regressive. And whereas there’s an abundance of nuance when it comes to whether the Empire or the Alliance is morally “better,” everyone can agree on one thing: The Imperial nobles are bad. And Braunschweig, as their leader, is the most bad.

Another way to tell Braunschweig is evil is that he frequently does things like imply that if celebrated admirals don’t do his bidding, he’ll have their young daughters killed.

Braunschweig—who is the late Kaiser Friedrich IV’s son-in-law, by the way—is actually too unambiguously evil to be interesting on his own. The only thing that holds my attention about him beyond the fact that I want to cut off his ponytail is the fact that he is one half of yet another pair of men. And his loyal retainer and counterpart, Ansbach, is in turn only interesting insofar as parallels are set up between his relationship to Braunschweig and Kircheis’s relationship to Reinhard, particularly (so far at least) in episode 9:

Remember this? The similarities between Ansbach and Kircheis’s frenzied searches for Braunschweig and Reinhard, respectively, are too striking to be anything but intentional.

Like I said in my episode 9 post, though, there’s no reason as of yet to think that the relationship between Braunschweig and Ansbach is romantic; even if that’s what the parallels point to, they’re one-sided at this stage, so if Ansbach’s feelings of devotion do cross over into romantic territory, it’s unlikely that they’re reciprocated. Sorry, Ansbach.

Incidentally, Ansbach doesn’t have a last name. Or he doesn’t have a first name. In any case, he only has one name, and it’s Ansbach. Also, if I didn’t hate him so much, I’d be worried about his skin. He looks like he could use several glasses of water, maybe applied directly to his face.

Willibald Joachim von Merkatz (and Schneider)

Merkatz was actually voted the class of 447’s Most Expressive Eyebrows at military academy. Wow!

Merkatz, a very accomplished and grizzled admiral who has been griping about Reinhard and his youth since episode 1, will spend more time in the spotlight later, but I wanted to mention him now for a couple reasons: First of all, his eyebrows are incredible and I can’t stop watching him move them. I honestly don’t know what he’s saying most of the time because I’m too focused on his eyebrows. I’m simultaneously impressed and scared. Second of all, we can go ahead and add Merkatz to the growing stack of (male) characters who are one half of a defined (male) pair.

Merkatz’s counterpart, Bernhard von Schneider, is a young officer who spends most of his screentime in episode 18 with his jaw on the floor while Merkatz explains to him the concept of nuance.

Or maybe he’s just mesmerized by Merkatz’s eyebrows. Same, Schneider. Same.

Anyway, keep an eye on these two, and by these two, I mean Merkatz’s eyebrows. I’d also recommend maybe paying attention to Merkatz himself, and Schneider too, because there will be a lot more to say about them down the line.

Stray Tidbits

I really enjoy how ostentatious literally everything to come into contact with the Imperial nobility is; like how are Reinhard and Kircheis's ships less flashy than something? How?

I am being personally victimized by the fact that this guy’s monocle doesn’t actually fall out.