#and no worries about the length of the rant i wanted to hear everyone’s thoughts <333< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[klaus-littlestwolf]

Random Thought: Klaus Mikaelson

Someone requested a Yandere!Klaus Random Thought so I figured I’d give it a try

Yandere!Klaus

He would be obsessed with you from the moment he first meets you. Needless to say you do not feel what he does right away and he’s determined to help you accept what you’re clearly denying.

At first he was just kind to you, it was strange for everyone, seeing Klaus take a liking to you in such a way and Damon often wanted to take advantage of it, sending you to distract him whenever something is going on but you don’t like it. Something about the way that the Hybrid looks at you is unsettling.

He is a very clingy person, the moment he got your phone number he texted you all the time, often calling you just to say ‘goodnight’ and hear your sweet voice.

His possessiveness also knows no bounds. He will follow you whenever you can’t talk to him, needing to know what was more important, usually ending up on a little spree with Kol to let off steam, though that creates its own problems. Where Klaus is more possessive Kol is extremely obsessive and manipulative. He is the kind to recommend following you everywhere you go and trying to drive a wedge between you and your friends. Klaus knows that listening to Kol is usually the wrong choice but he can’t help himself, he needs you, he needs you like he needs blood, it causes him physical pain when he doesn’t know where you are and if you’re okay so he does as his brother suggests, he follows you all the time now.

He actually went to your work and compelled your boss to fire you so that you would have more personal time to spend on him. He felt a little bad about it but when your first call leaving the office was to him, wanting him to listen to you as you rant about your idiot boss, wanting him to be the one to comfort you, he knew he was right to do it as it got him more than he could have expected. He sat on your couch later that night comforting you and even got to hold you as you ate ice cream and watched sad movies. Of course he assured you that if you ever need anything, he’s here for you and you have no reason to worry about money.

Klaus was extremely overprotective as well, though he did it in ways that weren’t very noticeable to you. You had started spending more time with Klaus after you lost your job and he began working to push your friends away which with how much they hate the Hybrid, wasn’t very hard at all. 2 weeks after you lost your job Elena, Bonnie, Stefan, and Caroline had all stopped speaking to you and Klaus was going to great lengths to take up all your time and keep you away from Damon.

He is more than happy to hurt anyone who hurts you in anyway. In a drunken confession you had admitted an ex from high school had assaulted you while you were drunkenly talking about what kind of kid Klaus would have been if he had gone to high school in modern times. 2 hours later you had fallen asleep in his arms and he carefully laid you on the couch before compelling a cop in town to give him the boys address. Honestly it wasn’t difficult to find him at all and he was dead no more than 3 hours after you told Klaus about him, no one gets to hurt his girl and live. No One. He was back 20 minutes later and lifting you back onto his chest, not willing to give up the chance you had given him to hold you all night long.

About a month after losing your job you couldn’t afford your apartment anymore and you hadn’t been able to find a new job as every interview you went on Klaus compelled the employer to get rid of your file. You told him that you were going to be moving in with your brother in Pennsylvania and that’s when he talked you into moving in with him. Spend never ending time with Klaus, never have to pay any kinds of bills and get a bedroom all your own that was almost 3 times the size of your bedroom in the apartment? Hell Yes! Living with him seemed like a great idea and while you love being with Klaus you quickly begin realizing just how possessive of you he is. Once you move in you can’t walk out the front door without him asking where you’re going and tagging along with you or telling you that you can do that later only later never comes. You’re with him 96% of every day, the other 4% you get alone in your room when you shower or when he’s busy painting so you watch something alone.

He gets even more touchy than he was before, becoming quite bold about it. He snuggles with you when you watch TV, you having taken to catching him up on movies he needs to have seen like the Harry Potter or Star Wars series, classic must see movies like The Breakfast Club, The Goonies, and The Lost Boys (which he particularly hated considering how much you love the vampire boys in it). He will often pull you either almost or completely into his lap, especially when a male character you like is on screen. The first time he ever kissed you was while you were introducing him to the MCU and you watched The Winter Soldier movie, Bucky Barnes being drool worthy. You pulled away, stunned but he looked so happy and content with having kissed you that you couldn’t be mad at him. You knew he had a crush on you since a few days after you moved in and you liked Klaus too but you didn’t realize how obsessed he truly was.

The beginning of your relationship really started when you first went against something Klaus had said. You wanted to go to a concert in town square that night and he had said no, that he didn’t want to go and you can’t go alone, that bad people are out at those kinds of things, especially vampires looking to feed and concerts are fantastic places to do that. He promised to take you to a show the next time one of your favorite bands had a tour nearby but you didn’t listen. You snuck out while he was in the shower and you enjoyed the show, eating some food at the different vendors and leaving a bit early so you weren’t out past 10 so maybe he wouldn’t be too mad. On the way home you heard footsteps behind you on the road which was weird, you were walking down a dead end road to Klaus’ mansion on like 20 acres of land he owned, no one else should be going this way. You must have turned around at least 3 times and you finally sighed, pulling out your phone and calling Klaus.

‘Hello?’

‘Klaus!’

‘Y/n. Nice to hear your voice. I wasn’t sure whether you were safe or not considering you just walked out and left me alone with plans to watch your Supernatural show all by myself.’ You felt a bit bad at that, knowing you had begged him to watch it for a while and you had hyped it up so now he had been excited to start it and you ditched him.

‘Look, I’m sorry, okay? But can you stop trying to scare me and just come out? This isn’t funny, I’ll make it up to you, I swear!’ He didn’t respond right away and you couldn’t hear anything from him.

‘What are you talking about Bunny?’ You rolled your eyes, looking around.

‘I know it’s you following me and trying to make your point but come on, I’m almost home, okay? Just walk the rest of the way with me!’ You shouted the last part so he could hear you in the trees wherever he was.

‘I’m at home, Y/n…I’ve been waiting for you. I was gonna give you the silent treatment until you offered to make hot chocolate and stay up late to watch the show…is something wrong?’

‘No!’ You insisted, not wanting him to know that he might have been right to not want you going. ‘Of course not. I’m fine. I’ll be back in a few minut-‘ you cut yourself off when you turned to look back and saw a pair of red eyes through the trees. You gripped the phone tight and turned, beginning to sprint. Something yanked you off your feet and that’s the last thing you remember before waking up in Klaus’ bed.

You awoke in transition, realizing that you had died and thanked God Klaus had healed you earlier that day or you would be dead. You apologized like crazy for not trusting him which is exactly what Klaus had wanted when he compelled that vampire to chase you and snap your neck. He was sure that, vampire or not, next time you would listen.

You snuggled up to him that night after drinking a few blood bags and it was the first time you kissed him yourself. That was the start of your romantic relationship for you, little did you know you were around 3-4 months behind Klaus.

Klaus Mikaelson Masterlist

Random Thoughts

[satashiiwrites]

morning writing drafts

I should be working on sleepless in la. 

Big SHOULD there. 

Instead, I think i’ve come up with a name for a 911/mass effect mashup.  And been graphic editing because who wants to finish their rom com that should have been done already?  

*sigh*

Title: The First Spectre (aka previously known as untitled 911/Mass Effect space opera slowburn) chapter 1 vs prologue

Fandom: 911, Mass Effect Trilogy

Pairing: endgame Buddie (MShenko equivalent).  Assume anything else is fair game until we hit ME3 territory because i’m totally making Taylor into Miranda and Abby is going to be Liara. 

Tags/warnings: i’m still not committing to writing this monster length fic(and I do mean monster length if I go for it—like 600k of the slowest of slow burns).  In the meantime i’m evidently writing a beginning, a divorce-era horizon disaster, and can clearly picture the catalyst firing/’don’t leave me behind’ scene in all its angsty goodness. Author may be in deep trouble.  First draft.  Assume Eddie=Kaidan Alenko and Buck=MShep.  Chimney is totally Joker.  Use of military terms that may confuse some audiences and be completely inappropriate as author does not have a military background and just reads too many generation kill fics. 

Tagging because they asked @shortsighted-owl​.  If you would like to be tagged for any updates or snippets from this one please let me know. 

Lieutenant Edmundo Diaz—known to his family as Eddie or everyone else as Lt Diaz or just Diaz—sat in the copilot’s chair on the bridge listening to Flight Lieutenant Han, aka Chimney, grumble about their newest mission orders.  Eddie thought that the grumbling was mostly for show—being assigned to work under Captain Robert Nash was a coveted position and good for your career.  The Normandy (known also by it’s engineering designation as SR-118) was a new type of freighter that was a joint project between the Alliance and the alien council races. There was no ship faster or with better handling anywhere in the fleet. 

Chimney really should be happier he was getting the privilege of flying the equivalent of the most luxurious, high tech interplanetary transport ever made.  Instead, he was grumbling about scuttlebutt that he’d heard while getting his clearance physical from Dr. Wilson. 

“Did you hear who you’ll be working with?” Chimney asked Eddie, implying that Eddie should be unhappy about his new CO.  

“I heard I’d be working with Commander Buckley and there’s nothing to say.  He’s a good soldier.”

“A good soldier?!?  You heard what happened on Akuze right?  That he’s the only one who survived?”

“It means he’s capable and smart,” Eddie argued, trying to put an end to Chimney’s rant that had been going on for over a half hour.  “That’s good to have in a team CO.”

Chimney scoffed. “His entire team died except him. You going to be happy with him hanging you out to dry while he hightails it to safety?”

Eddie was beginning to think that the intel folder that had been sitting in his inbox wasn’t common knowledge as there’d just been a string of nonsensical numbers and letters as the sender’s contact information.  He’d been sent the extended—and highly classified—report on the Akuze Incident as well as the redacted official report that had been released to the press along with his official orders and a copy of Commander Buckley’s jacket. Eddie thought that Commander Buckley was lucky to have survived the first contact the Alliance had ever had with a thresher maw that had literally devoured an entire colony and then the rest of his naval special warfare unit that had been sent to investigate why the colony had gone dark.

Thresher maws were basically giant, hungry space worms with teeth the size of a small shuttle and spat acidic venom up to 3 clicks with eerie accuracy that would melt through shields and armor in less than two minutes.  If you didn’t die from the acid then you had to worry with either being eaten or crushed to death.  The damned things also hunted by noise and vibration so there was no escaping them other than getting off planet in a hurry. 

Eddie might have nightmares about incidents like Akuze.  Commander Buckley had his respect for surviving one. The fact that the commander wasn’t out of his brain and stashed in some head doctor’s padded room drooling from being drugged to the gills spoke to his mental strength and resiliency.  The rest of his military jacket was even more impressive with the noted list of assignments and commendations including that he’d graduated from the Interplanetary Combatives Training (ICT) program and was one of the rare N7s. 

Eddie’s only question was who had sent him the file—he was to be the XO for the ground team but it was highly unusual for him to have gotten this much intel up front…so who had given it to him?  It could be Captain Andersen since his name was also all over Commander Buckley’s file which suggested a mentor-mentee relationship but it could also have been the Commander himself or a third party who wanted to somehow prejudice Eddie in some way. 

He was inclined to give his new CO the benefit of the doubt and see how things went.  Paperwork often omitted some truths and as a biotic Eddie had experienced his fair share of off-the-books blowbacks and prejudices. 

Chimney, however, wasn’t.  The man was an inveterate gossip and had his ear tuned to get all the latest scuttlebutt.  Eddie had only known him for a few weeks but he knew if he needed to know anything about anybody on the ship then Chimney was the person to see. 

[msanimedolphin]

~Back In The Game~

~Chapter Eleven~

-Series Masterlist-

What happens when a girl who loves volleyball joins a boys' volleyball club? Does she find love? Will she relive her past or move forward? Join (L/N) (Y/N) on a journey with fun twists and turns.

I don't own Haikyuu or any of the characters.

-Last Time-

“(Y/N)?” Someone says as you’re snapped out of your thoughts. 

“Huh?!” You say while looking for the source of the voice.

“Are you okay?” A boy with medium-length dark brown hair and slightly down-turned eyes that make him look sleepy, says.

“Yeah, I’m good…” You drag out hoping he’ll tell you his name.

“Ennoshita Chikara.” He states. You smile and hold out your hand for a handshake.

“(L/N) (Y/N), but please call me (Y/N). It’s nice to meet you.” You introduce yourself while shaking his hand.

“It’s nice to meet you too.” He expresses as he lets go of your hand. “I’m a second-year, and I’m guessing you’re a first-year?”

“Yeah…” You shyly confirm while rubbing the back of your neck. ‘Cute.’ He thinks. 

“Well, I’m glad you joined the club.”

“O-Oh, I’m-” You try to explain before being interrupted.

“(Y/N)!! Hinata yells running up to you. “Look at my jacket! Isn’t it cool?!”

“Yeah…so cool!” You say, trying to be excited for him. He continues to rant about his jacket while you stand there smiling awkwardly. Someone says your name so you turn to see Kiyoko next to you. “Yes?” 

She holds out her hands that have something in them, something you didn’t notice she had at first. You ask if it’s for you and she nods. You hesitantly take it from her with thanks. You look at the soft black object before unfolding it. When you do, you see it’s the front of a jacket. You freeze for a moment before looking at Kiyoko with hope. She smiles and nods, indicating you to turn it around. You look back at the jacket and slowly turn it around. ‘Karasuno High School Volleyball Club’ is printed on the back. Staring at the words, you notice tears start to form in your eyes. You quickly wipe them away, hoping no one saw, but unfortunately, some people did.

“Tch. If I had to put mine on, you have to also.” Tsukishima says bitterly. You look at him with a worried expression before trying it on. 

“It fits!!” You exclaim excitedly as you start looking at it in awe. ‘At least she’s not cryin anymore…’

“Of course, it fits. Why wouldn’t it?” Daichi asks. You stop admiring your jacket and look at him.

“O-Oh, um…” You stutter as you try to find an excuse. “I just got excited.” He looks at you skeptically but decides to drop it. You sigh in relief as you go stand with your first-year clubmates.

“(Y/N)! YOU LOOK SO HOT IN OUR JACKETS! BLACK SUITS-” Tanaka starts screaming before getting cut off by Daichi hitting his head.

“Hey, guys?” Daichi says to get your guys’ attention. “As the captain of the Karasuno Volleyball Club, let me be the first…to welcome you!”

“Thank you, sir!” Kageyama and Hinata shout together. Everyone disperses into their own little groups. You walk to Daichi, Suga, and Kiyoko.

“Excuse me…” You politely get their attention. “I just wanted to thank you for letting me play in the game. Also for letting me join the club and giving me a jacket.” You lovingly look at your jacket, then look at your senpais. “Thank you!” you exclaim while bowing. You hear chuckling before someone speaks.

“There’s no need to bow.” You stand straight and look at Suga. He smiles, “We’re grateful you joined.” You smile and quickly hug him. You thank him again before hugging Kiyoko and Daichi. After hugging the three you go over to Ennoshita and the two other guys with him.

“Hey, Ennoshita.” You say friendly.

“Oh, hey, (Y/N), what’s up?”

“Since I’m officially a member, I wanted to meet everyone.” As you finish you look at the two boys with Ennoshita. “Hi, I’m (Y/N)!” You introduce yourself.

“Kinoshita Hisashi.” Says a short, spiky light brown-haired boy.

“Narita Kazuhita.” Says a dark-haired boy with a shaved head.

“It’s nice to meet you both.” You say smiling. They respond with ‘You too.’ You ask them what positions all three of them play.

“We’re wing spikers.” Ennoshita replies while pointing at himself and Kinoshita.

“And I’m a middle blocker.” Narita says. “What about you?”

“Oh, well, I don’t play much anymore but I was a wing spiker and then a libero…” They looked at you in confusion. Not wanting to get into it, you tell them it’s a long story. You bid them farewell and go over to the first years. Unaware of the conversation happening between the third years, you start talking to your new group.

“That’s settled, I think,” Daichi says with a breath of relief. “Suga. You and Tanaka helped them out behind the scenes, right?”

“Huh?! N-Not really, no!” 

“I’m just glad it worked out.”

“I know (Y/N) helped them quite a lot.” Daichi turns to look at Suga. “She would practice with them before and after school. And she always helped them instead of practicing herself…” Suga looks at you with admiration after speaking. He then sees the look on Daichi’s face. “O-Or at least that’s what I’ve been told!!” Daichi looks at him not believing him. 

“Thanks.” He says to Suga, who looks at Kiyoko.

“Good work!” Suga says as he and Kiyoko put their hands on Daichi’s shoulders. This causes him to become a stuttering mess with a blush. Their attention is then directed to Hinata and Kageyama yelling about practicing more, which leads to talk about practice games.

“I did it!! I got one!!” You all hear a voice rapidly approaching the gym. Suddenly the door is pushed open and a guy with messy black hair and glasses is seen. His clothes are disheveled and he’s out of breath. “I’ve got us a practice game!!” He exclaims excitedly. Everyone is surprised as he continues. “It’s against one of the top four teams in the prefecture! Aoba Johsai!” Multiple questions are asked like, ‘You mean blue castle?!’ and ‘How did he manage that?’ You hear Hinata and Kageyama ask each other who the mystery man is before smiling like kids on Christmas morning.

“Oh! You two must be the problem children! Hinata and Kageyama!” the mystery man says looking at the two.

“Yes, sir…” They say together.

“And you must be the new manager!” He says to you.

“Y-Yes, sir. I’m (L/N) (Y/N).”

“I’m Takeda Ittetsu, the new club advisor. I don’t have any experience with volleyball, so I can’t give you instructions on how to play, but I’ll do my best to help any other way!” He turns his attention to Daichi and Suga, he begins to apologize and explain why he hasn’t been around. “There’s a condition to playing against Aoba Johsai.”

“What is it?” You ask. Takeda looks at Kageyama. “Does it involve Kageyama?”

“Yeah…” He begins. “He has to be the setter for the entire game.” You gasp and look at him in disbelief. Your head then snaps to Suga. He looks upset. You go up to him as Tanaka starts yelling about disrespect. You block him out, only focusing on Suga. When you get to him you gently put your hand on his shoulder.

“You okay?” You ask with evident worry. He just looks at you. “Hey, it’s okay. We can always decline-”

“No. It’s alright.” He says trying to hide his pain.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” He says before walking up to the group. “Um, I think it’s fine. We don’t get chances like this very often.”

“Suga! How can you be okay with this?! You’re Karasuno’s official setter, not him!” Tanaka angrily yells.

“I know but… I want to see Hinata and Kageyama use their quick attack in a real game! I want to see how far it will get us!” Suga looks at Daichi after he’s done talking. They seem to have a silent conversation.

“Sensei, can you please give us the details?” You don’t pay attention to the details because your focus is on Suga. 

Everyone gets ready to leave, so you hurry to be able to catch up to Suga. Just as you’re about to call his name, you hear Kageyama.

“I only got into the starting lineup due to that condition, But next time, I’m going to earn that spot the real way!” You’re shocked at first but soon smile. ‘He’s changing…’ you think. They stare at each other for a second before Suga responds.

“Oh, I was surprised because I thought I didn’t exist to you.” ‘What?! I swear I’m going to-” your thoughts are stopped when Kageyama speaks.

“Huh?... Why would I think that?” He asks, tilting his head.

“Because you have more talent and you’re more athletic than I could ever be?”

“The gap in experience between us isn’t overcome that easily! That and…” Just then Daichi, Tanaka, and Hinata call out to Suga. Frustrated, Kageyama continues. “The other members seem to… t-t-trust you…a lot… and stuff…” Suga is extremely shocked, as you are too. “I’m not giving up!” After Kageyama admits this, Suga stares at him. 

“Good. I’m not giving up either.” Suga replies with determination.

“Suga! Daichi said he’s gonna buy us meat buns!” Tanaka shouts. You take this as your opportunity to slip in behind the group.

“Kageyama? Isn’t Aoba Johsai the high school most Kitagawa Daiichi players go to?” Suga asks as they walk.

“Usually, why?”

“Well, is this game going to be hard for you?”

“Maybe if we were still teammates but they’re the opponents. I’m going to play with everything I have. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“Good.”

“Are you sure you’re okay with this, Suga? Because I’m not!” Tanaka expresses.

“It does suck. But…they probably think Kageyama is still the same as he was in middle school. We have to show ‘em how wrong they are.”

“He’s got a point.” Daichi says as he comes back with meat buns. “We have to show them that Kageyama isn’t the only one to be afraid of. Right, Hinata?” Everyone looks at Hinata, only to see him stuffing his face. He salutes and tries to talk but can’t due to all the food in his mouth. Kageyama and Tanaka pick him up by this collar, but before they can yell at him they feel an angry aura that gives them shivers. They slowly turn their heads to look behind them to find the source. Suga and Daichi look at their scared faces and follow their gazes, which are directed at something behind the third-years. When they look they see you staring at the three in front of them. You slowly walk to the three.

“Put. Him. Down.” You demand. Scared out of their minds, they put Hinata down. Hinata gives you a closed-eyed smile.

“Thank you (Y/N)! You saved me!” He opens his eyes expecting you to be back to your happy self. He jumps then stiffens. (Y-Y/N)?”

“Daichi…” You say nicely, which scares everyone even more.

“Y-Yeah?’ He asks cautiously.

“Did you buy meat buns for everyone?”

“Yes…”

“Did you buy extra for Hinata?”

“No.” ‘I know where this is going…’ The four boys think.

“So, Hinata…” The said boy gulps. “Why do you have a full bag all to yourself?”

“W-Well…U-Um…” Hinata stutters while trying to defend himself.

“Tanaka…” You begin.

“Yes, Angel?” He asks as he’s immediately at your side.

“Hold him.” You say with a smirk. Before Tanaka can grab him, Hinata starts running. “HINATA!! GET BACK HERE!!!”

“I’m sorry! Please don’t kill me!”

“WELL NEXT TIME DON’T TAKE MY FOOD!!”

“Hey! Volleyball club! No fighting outside my store!” the shopkeeper yells.

“Sorry…” You, Hinata, and Tanaka say sheepishly.

You see Tsukishima and Yamaguchi walking toward you so you call them over. You begin chatting with everyone until you notice Hinata standing off to the side smiling. You make eye contact with him and he freezes. ‘Is she still mad?’ he questions silently. After staring at him, you smile and silently laugh. Once he sees this he relaxes. You hold up a meat bun and gesture him over with your head. He walks over to you and you hand him the food.

“Next time, don’t take my food.” You both laugh until Daichi says your and Kageyama’s names.

“When you guys are done eating, do you have a minute?” He asks, pointing at the shop.

“Sure.” You both say. 

~To Be Continued~

[theyluvlyss]

just saw that u watched atsv, and I've been wanting to rant to somebody about it for so LONG. Im curious about your thoughts on it tho, mind sharing?

𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧...

you've unlocked one of lyssa's mile long tangents. prepare to crumble under my wrath of fangirl-ism. to lie buried beneath the wreckage of my infinite declarations. and to suffocate amongst my many, many convictions /ᐠ○⩊○マ~ !

no, but fr, this may be a lot, so I apologize in advance for the length. however, I'll organize all of my thoughts into cute little sections for you and the others who may read this, if that helps any :).

oh, and short disclaimer, the following is my own opinion. I want to remind y'all not to take whatever I say so seriously/to heart. if you don't like what I have to say/think, then just scroll on and go about your day. no hate needed. and, if you'd like to discuss more in depth, dms are always open (I love to talk😻).

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐞 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 :

I give the movie a solid 8.5/10. the only reason it's not a full 9-10/10 is because of two things;

a.) the pacing was crazy, like, it kind of overstimulated me? not in a bad way, exactly, but it definitely made it hard for me to focus while being slung through, like, ten different emotions every ten seconds. so much so, that when the movie ended, I felt nothing💀 (I was mad/hype/in my feels later, ofc) but like... after everythingggg, I felt very numb and needed a second longer than usual to recollect.

b.) everyone needed to take several high dose chill pills. like, am I the only one who feels as though certain character arcs/developments were erased? and that everyone needed to just sit tf down and t a l k fr? idkidk, don't press me✋🏽😃✋🏽.

other than that, solid movie and I'm so, so, excited for the next one, and I can't wait to start writing fanfic and make a spider-sona (or two...or three or four or five💀-).

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐯𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐬/𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐜 :

the soundtrack is so fire !! straight heat🔥, not one bad track, just banger after banger fr😻😆. when I give it my second watch (cuz no, I didn't watch it again yesterday like I said, I got busy, it's halloweekend, give me a break lol), I'll definitely list some of my faves from the track.

to be honest, though, I don't know what I expected. of course atsv had some heat. so did the first movie ! so I expect beyond the spider-verse to deliver again.

visuals... they ate down for the most part, I was totally expecting that. I only have one, eensy-weensy little pet peeve, and that's the way gwen's world/coloring is done. personally, it's just not my cup of tea, I didn't really vibe with it, which made it hard for me to enjoy a lot of her home world/dimension scenes. and ofc, it's just my opinion. if you liked it, awesome. I don't expect to start something or like... have the whole artstyle be changed, that's not what I'm saying.

I just wasn't messing with it, and that's totally okay :). everyone else was *💋* perfect, and my faves definitely had to be our miles' (y'know, 1610!miles) dimension, pavitr's, hobie's... okay, so, basically, everyone else's but gwen's (y'all are going to start to notice a theme here, btw🥴💀). but, if anyone has some niche facts or interpretations on why her world was colored as such, I'd love to hear them :).

now onto the good stuff >:3...

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬 :

I- *crying about him every second of the day*...

poor boy needs a break, bro, like... (minus the spider-duties, ofc) I was deeply/heavily relating to his struggles. having all of these different things running through your mind at once, all things imperative for a good future/outcome. and then the constant stress of worrying about/for all of this different shit. especially the family bits, him just trying to do right by them but also needing s p a c e hit home mad hard😭.

and then, omg, all of these people telling him all of these different things... how he, A TEENAGE BOY, has to make all of these life altering (some life ending) choices for MULTIPLE realities, including his own ?? have the adults in the building (movie) lost they whole entire minds?! anyways, sorry, lemme chill out. this is supposed to be about miles💀.

as usual, I loved him and his personality like, truly resonated with this awkward swag vibe he has going on (and have since the first movie) and I just-...

he's pookie, fr, and I wish the world and the ppl who claim to love him in it so deeply would act like such😭💋. and he was so, so, so real for dissing peter (b. parker) every time he'd try to talk because bro, he was such a snitch, idcidc💀. and then real again for the whole, "everyone keeps tryna tell me how my story is supposed to go. Nah... i'ma do my own thing." line, like yesss king, go off✨️.

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𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐠𝐰𝐞𝐧 :

she-... ouuu...

y'all, I can't express how much this lil' girl got on my nerves. not to say that I don't understand, I do, trust. but it's not an excuse. and oh my days, did she make me cringe like... she gives me sheltered person vibes, which I was gonna say isn't her fault, but it kinda is when she shut herself out from the whole world willingly😭. again, I understand why, but she set herself up doing that. on top of being so stereotypically white?

no offense, but I audibly gasped when she called mr. and mrs. morales by their first names😃. like girl🥴- ! and then this whole, "I like you but actually lol no I don't because I'm lowkey with hobie, but no, I'm not." thing she's doing with miles? either miss girl is terrible at social cues, orrrr😗... she's an ass🤷🏽‍♀️. sorry but that wasn't cute, like if I were miles, I would just have to let gwen go, I mean, she even said it herself;

"in every universe, gwen stacy falls for spider-man... and in every other universe, it…doesn’t end well.”

like girl, if that's what you believe, then quit it with the, "you might have a chance with me but probably not, let's find out." vibes you're radiating, please😭🙏🏽. like, throwing the whole spider-verse off balance because, "i JuSt wAnTeD tO sEe hIm aGaIn x'0 !" when she literally knew and AGREED that she shouldn't have ever gone to see him again in the first place (because it's not like miles knew she had the ability to come see him whenever, so she should've just kept it that way) was such a foul move, bro...

anyway, I'm done dragging her, because on the flip side...

gwen deserved so much better from her father. sure, he came around towards the end, but where was the unconditional love and support that a parent is supposed to give, regardless of anything else? like, I was wholeheartedly shook to my core when gwen told him she was spider-girl, and his response was to arrest her.

sir...?! if it were me, I'd take all my shit from my room and never speak to that man again. like, oh 'ight, that's how you feel? I'm out here essentially doing your job after having to deal with the murder of my best friend (which you blamed me for, mind you !) and you want me in jail? still?? even after finding out I'm your lil' princess baby girl a.k.a. your daughter, bitch ???

sorry, but I'll say it again, my dad would never see me again 'cept when I'm busy being spider-girl on the tv😹. and just in general, poor gwen fr, like, I truly felt it when spider-woman swooped into the scene in the start of the movie, and gwen's immediate response was to go, "can you adopt me?" and like, sure, "sHe wAs jOkInG/bEiNg aWkwArD" but, coming from a girl who wished she'd had better parents...

that was not a joke, she fully meant that shit, you're not changing my mind😹🥴. anyways, all in all, I have very 60/40 feelings about gwen. sixty being my dislike, forty being my like (or, more accurately, understanding of her person regardless of my dislike).

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𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫-𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧 :

let's just acknowledge that she's voiced by the queen, ms. issa rae😻 !!! like she ate down, I don't care what anyone has to say. now, onto her actual character, she was so honorable for taking gwen in. like wow, I wish someone would swoop into my life, via sick motorcycle and sweet webs, and snatch me up into a better life🤩. and then further advocating for her (gwen) and her actions throughout the movie, even though it was risky?

she's so amazing (as all spider-people tend to be, harhar, puns). and yes, it was unfortunate when she couldn't do much for gwen upon miguel finding out what had been done and yada-yada, but she did all she could/agreed to/said she would do. She stood on her word, and that's all that matters🤷🏽‍♀️.

honestly, I don't have much on her except for the fact that I remember thinking she was pretty sick, so yeah :).

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𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 :

um, I don't... dislike him, I guess? but I definitely don't like him, nor am I attracted to him. I kind of don't get/understand that, but to each their own.

b u t... I do wanna say one thing because I hope that once I do say it, I start seeing a bit of a change/more of it...

I've read some miguel fanfiction, both before and after watching the movie. not saying I scoured the depths of tumblr for it or anything, read every last piece of writing on him there is to exist. that's not the case. but, from what I have read, y'all didn't get his character right imo. some aspects, sure, but his whole persona has been completely misconstrued. misinterpreted.

he's not this extra stoic, leader, jason todd-type/esque dude. to me, that man gave awkward and anti-social. I'd even go as far as to say he might've been a little autistic coded, but again, as always, that's just me ✋🏽😗✋🏽. and sure, yes, there was stoic behavior, which comes along with being rather awkward and potentially on the spectrum. and I'm not at all denying that he's a badass, he totally is.

but outside of that, and outside of him being super aggro towards miles, any scene of him was either him keeping to his lonesome unless absolutely necessary. self-isolating (which can be moreso due to trauma/other mental troubles rather than autism), and wanting nothing to do with anything he wasn't comfortable with (and I definitely wanna say he didn't want to be leader of anything/in a position of power, that's just how shit lined up for him, and it's just like... what can you do🤷🏽‍♀️?).

he was consistent with his information, both giving it and explaining deeper. he didn't like to be interrupted while doing so. and there was that one moment where talking to lyla (lila? lyla?¿) where he said something like, "do the explaining thing that do you do."

"what thing?"

"wha-😃? what do you mean, 'what thing?' the information explain-y thingy😐����."

and it's not even the only time where him and lila have had this awkward (but cute, ngl) dynamic with each other. anyways, whatever, I could just be talking out of my ass and being contradictory (becauss he is stoic but he isnt but he is-?¿), but-

I need/wanna see more awkward and introverted miguel content, not so much no-nonsense and hella apathetic...

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𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐥𝐚 (𝐥𝐲𝐥𝐚?¿) :

someone tell me how to spell her name so I can do her proper justice lol🙏🏽.

but anyways, I like her a lot :D. I mean, I know we barely see her, but just from her fit, voice/lil valley girl accent, and vibes alone...

oh yeah, we'd be besties if we ever met, I just know it. lila is so cool and I hope she plays a bigger role in beyond the spider-verse😻.

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐞 :

he's so hot and cool and aesthetically pleasing to look at, I just wish I could understand what that nigga was saying🥴💀. no shade, I'm so deeply infatuated with him, I just... that accent is thick as hell, so that's my sign to be sure my next watch has captions on😭.

through context clues, though, I was happy when he sided with miles/supported his journey to do whatever he felt it was best to do. and how he quit being apart of... what was it called, the spider-society? I-... and then at the end when he shows up to help gwen and them help miles. also, hello, the friendship between him and pavitr is so cute, I live for that😭.

also, his suit kicks ass. I thought the spikes and the fact that he fights with a guitar was a very nice touch, and I really dig how when miles was like, "how are you even cooler under the mask?" he's like, "I was this cool the whole time😌.

like okay, periodt, love that for you, king✨️. like shiiii, I believe it🥴😻. also, is it canon that him and gwen were together? or is it a friends with benefits type of deal? who knows, who cares. I don't >:) (I will being writing fanfiction about him).

also, quick headcanon !! I don't know why, but he gives me vibes that he can't stay focused for the life of him. er, like... he can, but to do so, he has to be focused on something completely unrelated. also, hello, he's a spider-person... shooting off un-asked for quips and jokes is kind of part of the spider-package. like, there were so many times where a person (irl or in the movie, doesn't matter) could swear hobie wasn't paying a lick of attention because he's off doing something else, talking about something totally unrelated...

just a completely unserious ass dude, right? wrong. well, not fully. but no, he's paying attention by... not paying attention. does that make sense😃? anyways...

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𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐩𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐫 :

he's my silly little meow-meow babygirl and I want nothing but the very best for him😆🥺. no but for real, I was on edge watching him try to "do both." save his girlfriend or save her dad (which was apparently a canon event that miles disrupted but he just wanted to helppp😭).

I was so happy when everything went okay, even if it meant that a canon event was fucked with, but stillll...

also, I thought it was so funny how he's "perfect" lmao. he fr achieved that healthy, work-life-spider-man balance. truly peaked😌✨️. also his theme...!! the cultural tune implemented into it !!! what a bop, an absolute jam, a certified banger. I also really vibed with his spider-suit, like, the colors and incorporations clashed so well together, and just the design itself was so...💫sparkly💫, and the way he used his webs??

again, I adored it ! I have no clue what the arm cuffs (??) at the ends of them are called (plz let me know, because I know they're important/cultural, I believe🙏🏽), but once again, beautifully done and amazingly executed. I'm sure people (especially teens and younger) probably went nuts in the theater seeing that, like, y'all... representation matters, I will scream it until my own ears bleed.

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𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐩𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐛. (𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐝𝐚𝐲) :

when I tell you miles and I went, "you/he had a baby😃?!" at the exact same time, you would've thought I was in the movie lmao💀.

I don't know, I just wasn't expecting it (even though I probably should have been), but she was the cutest darn thing😻🥺 !! her red hair like mary jane's, but having peter's spider powers was just adorable, and the fact that I saw everyone hold her at least once... my heart... it aches😫♡.

never thought a cartoon would give me baby fever, yet here I am. and it was so special to me how he admitted to miles (even though/while under shitty circumstances) that he was the reason he (peter) even wanted to have her in the first place and made him ready to commit. he wants her to be just like him (miles) and that made me-

😭😭😭♡ plus, him constantly having her with him in the little baby carrier thingy... adorable. like, yes, mj, he did take her on another mission, and she was clearly having the time of her life, lay off😆✨️.

now, on the flipside... peter,,, you're a terrible mentor💀. like, I get he was doing his best, but his best was trash, what can I say🤷🏽‍♀️. just doing miles dirty, snitching and switching sides left and right. I mean, the fact that he only showed up during the "intervention" (more like trap-) just so there was a higher chance at helping miguel to convince miles to let innocent people, plus his own father, d i e? shit move, some mentor/father-type figure you are😒.

also, this next bit should really be in the miguel section (oh well), but... how uncool of him was it to literally set miles up with all of his spider friends and then have them try to convince him, "oh yeah, it's a canon event to let people die, including one of the closest people you have in your life. sorry, that's just how it is, accept it lol." like actually, fuck uncool, shit was totally buckwild and uncouth. on top of the fact that none of them thought to visit him for who knows how long?

yeah... no, get fucked, I hope miles figures out a way to beat the system in the next movie, just out of pure spite🙏🏽.

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𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐞-𝟒𝟐 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬 :

I know he was only there for half a second, but listen... how scary was it, coming to that realization that 1610 miles was in the wrong universe. like dawg, I had chilllsss, I was so nervous for him, like genuinely, the stress sweat was insane😃✋🏽.

y'all said tmi? gotchu. anyways, so yeah, but then immediately when uncle aaron showed up, I just knew, I was like, "oh shit, wait, okay, if he's here, and jefferson is dead..." like I put the pieces together so fast, I figured out e-42 miles was the prowler way quicker than I think I should've🥲✋🏽.

but when that mask came back, my mind wiped, cuz um...

like... I'm not the only person that... reacted... to the accent right? like-

I was shook, but when I was... it was like, "😱...😧...😳...😻" yk? like what buisness did he have sounding like that😃💀. anyways, sorry, I'm done. except I'm not, because my mind now contains sooo many headcannons on just earth-42 in general and then e-42 miles, like ?! and that shouldn't really be a surprise to anyone because I'm a writer I do this, this is what I do, I do this, this is what I do🤷🏽‍♀️<3.

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𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐫𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 :

- loved it when they did the thing... yk...

lolll that thing. I giggled very loud :).

- spot was nonchalantly terrifying and funny, and I really a d o r e villains like that. just unhinged and doing thier own thing while still proving themselves great threat and standing on buisness? yeah, he was awesome, I have zero nitpicks on him, he was done very well. althoughhhh.... I know I just said I have no nitpicks, but why is his backstory/origin so insignificant😭? like it's kind of lame, but at the same time, kind of... genius? like, I don't hate it, but I definitely wouldn't have come up with it so I guess that's a good thing. original/unique, in this specific case, I'd say🤷🏽‍♀️.

- I wish my mom was like rio. that's it, that's the post, #mommyissues🥲✨️.

- why did they wash out jefferson's character so badly? like, he still had his moments, but outside of that, he was basically just comic relief, which was... a little jarring given how he behaved in the first movie. I definitely feel like he could've been done a little better, but I supposed it wasn't a crazy bad change. like, there was the fact that miles (as spider-man, but still-) still had to tell him to get off of his ass, so it wasn't a complete 180° change or anything. just a noticeable one.

- ben riley had me giggling hard💀🥴✋🏽. emo ass, I loved him😭✨️.

- the live action editing/clips just- shdjfjekgoekkr !!! like how freaking cool, like I was deadass in my room screaming like a lunatic, like, I get it's the spider-verse so it's obvious those shots would be there but IDC LEMME FANGIRL IN MF PEACE !!!

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alright, that's all lol. if there's anything or anyone else I've forgotten to put in any of the different sections, I'll add them. but yeah, those are basically my surface level thoughts🥴. But of course, if anyone wants to go in depth with me, I'm totally open to that, and I hope to be posting headcanons and stuff about them soon (just gotta... set up the masterlist and stuff first😃).

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ...𝐬𝐨𝐨𝐨, 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐡... 𝐛𝐲𝐞, 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝 !

[misqnon]

HI im the anon who sent in that ask about one piece the other day and!!! AGHH. im too shy and socially anxious to send a message so sorry for communicating through asks but !!

THANK UU for responding to me !! it makes me so happy when people seem excited to talk to me, and i love hearing about peoples interests, so. i was very happy reading ur reply!!!! also this is probably an even longer message 😭 i cant help it i love to ramble

my history with one piece is long and complicated LMAO so i wont rant about it, but i started watching anime when i was 7 and one piece caught my attention when i was 10 i think, so ive had a lot of time to experience it tbh. but i was never that into it until i read the manga!! if im recommending one piece, i usually recommend the manga because its so much easier to get through imo.

honestly now that im caught up im like.. so afraid for the end of one piece. i never want it to end. i keep hearing that this is the final saga, and that one piece is ending soon, and my brain just. cannot comprehend it. i dont know if its just denial or what but i fully believe it won't end for another 5 years.. i havent experienced enough of the one piece world!!! i need more!! tell me everything about everyone in one piece PLEASE . it cant end . and those thoughts have been plaguing my mind since i restarted it LOL

looking at old forums to see peoples opinions from when each chapter dropped is genius??? i might have to do that.. i want to see their theories. i want to say "you have no idea whats in store...." or admire how smart they are for guessing things correctly

i find it funny that u like sanji cuz i have such complicated feelings around him. like he was my absolute favorite upon first introduction. i loved his kindness, i loved his interactions with gin, and i thought he was cool as hell. he was definitely a positive role model for my very damaged child brain. but i think the pervert joke and him treating women differently has pretty much ruined him for me. when i was younger a part of me felt like it was only right that he treat women better, but im pretty sure i just felt that way bc i hated the experience of being born female so much that the only way i could cope was by taking every and any advantage i could get. and then i figured out i was non binary.. and hes been turned into the most cartoonishly disgusting pervert .. and i see his potential and it just.. UGH!! you could have been so good. anyways all my feelings around him make it a lot more interesting to see u talk about him!! usually i just headcanon him as transfem and that satiates my burning rage and hatred towards him. but seeing sanji likers talk about liking sanji makes me actually like sanji more!! at this rate i might turn back into a sanji fan

im not in any one piece fan spaces but i AM consuming one piece content as often as possible (so all day. i dont have. a job. or school.). i know this is most likely a passing hyperfixation for me but im loving it anyways. i will definitely keep an eye on ur blog bc im sooo excited for when u catch up. im having so much fun theorizing about the end of the story and . and i hope u will too!! eek rant over thanks for listening (metaphorically)

HI ANON!! once again putting this under cut bc i will once again be freely speaking my way too many thoughts about the silly pirate manga. (fair warning. this. this is 2K words. anon im.....so sorry)

you don't have to worry about communicating through asks btw i literally do not care do whatever makes u comfortable my dude <3 and 1. thank YOU for sending a message :^) 2. i am loving the joyous atmosphere we have created ranting at each other back and forth HAHAHA it makes me happy to talk about interests like this as well!! (looks at length of my last reply and this one) clearly. we can think of this as like. electronic pen pals 👍bc i do be basically writing letters here LMAO

yea as u can tell its a little complicated for me too lmao ( i mean. the damn thing has been going on longer than i've been alive, so. it's touched many people in many ways. and it's complicated in its OWN right which. i'll get to. but holy shit 7 is younger than i expected! thats still a pretty long history (though i cant talk bc at age 4 i had a crush on goku even tho i had no idea what was happening half the time i was watching the dbz reruns on tv </3) and YEA. YEA THE MANGA IS. SO MUCH MORE STREAMLINED AND WELL PACED. EVEN THO I MISS THE COLOR AND MOVEMENT AND VOICE ACTING OF THE ANIME it was just takin too long. and i really like oda's art, so...reading the manga lets me look at it better. and there's more care put into the frames. but overall ur right the manga is chefs kiss in comparison to other versions (WHICH ARENT BAD!! JUST...SLOW. and though i think the live action wasnt really NEEDED i did. like it. and it is what got me back into op + got me caught up through east blue a lot faster HAHA)

tbh hearing that its in its last saga made me feel like i got into one piece at a really good time bc if i plan it right i can catch up and then follow along with the release for only a little while until its done. also the live action s2 and the "The One Piece" reanimated anime will be coming soon too. the content saturation is everywhere 👍(showering in it) THOUGH I DO FEEL A BIT PRESSURED LIKE. WHAT IF ONE PIECE FINISHES BEFORE I CATCH UP . which is insane bc im almost to wano (even though i hear wano is really long). and also...i think its been called the final "saga" but idk if that means final ARC you know...kinda like how water 7 and enies lobby kinda blend into one. or impel down and marineford are lumped together. idk i feel like we got a bit more. i just feel like there's so much we havent got answered yet and i dont think oda would just leave that stuff hanging. i know there;s a list out there of things that one piece needs to adress/come back to before it finishes but i havent looked at it bc im afraid of spoilers. however, just in my own mind theres a LOT i know has to happen that we need plenty of time for!! so. i wouldnt be surprised if it WAS 5 more years. i mean like...shanks needs to happen. i think zoro and sanji are gonna have a battle at some point (based on stuff ive seen from wano. im assuming) they gotta see laboon again. gotta revisit shirahoshi's situation. gotta see the dreams come true of each crewmate. tie off loose ends of side characters like tashigi and koby and the warlords. yanno

the "you have no idea what's in store.." is literally my exact emotions . i havent done it for this fandom YET but i plan to go to forums reading over ppl's theories like this

slash seeing how they react and getting giddy about it bc i like seeing how people react to shit. esp if they're shocked or enthusiastic about it like i usually am

about sanji. okay. listen. listen here. i. hate sanji. JNFNVFKDNL

no but actually no matter how complicated someone's feelings are towards sanji i promise you for sanji likers they are probably 100x more complicated unless they're weird dudebros who think he's cool (which he is but only like 10% of the time and not when he's being a chauvinistic ass)

one thing about me is that i. hate doing things that are distasteful or offensive in any capacity and that extends to the media i consume in that i dont like consuming media that is excessively problematic. i understand nuance so like OBVIOUSLY nothing is perfect and everything has problematic elements - but for a lot of shows there's one too many things on one side of the scale and i just dont like having that guilt on my shoulders consuming it. one piece fits that category but it's also SO BIG and SO LONG and its been going on for a WHILE and is such a phenomenon that i can let SOME stuff "slide"...and also realize "bitch one piece is so popular and near its end at this point that you, a single tumblr user, liking it or not liking it is not going to make a difference" and i'm (still) trying to make peace with that. things like oda's passive racism, The Entirety of Kamabakka Kingdom (literally don't even get me started), his blatant sexism in universe and his own opinions in the SBS...i've just come to realize i need to consume my media critically but still let myself have fun. im going through a rough period in life and this happens to be what my brain hyperfixated on and i cant change that so might as well have this outlet. ive made a lot of friends and am really enjoying the story for its good parts (found family, anti government and anti authoritarianism, importance of dreams and ambition and self love, the importance of mental health and trauma and how your past doesnt define you...etc)

i extend a lot of this thinking to sanji, too. to be fair i dont remember why he became my favorite. i think he was my fav when i watched it all those years ago but he wasnt a BIG FAV or anything. watching film red and the opla i think i went into it remembering he was my fav and he just stayed that way, but then i watched more and really started to like him for reasons like 1. im weak to flirtatious characters in general 2. im also weak to blonde men 😔 3. he's an asshole with a kind heart and i love a good juxtaposition 4. he just has some really cool badass moments tbh 5. and he's a LOT. i love characters that are a lot. he's loud and messy and overreactive and prissy and insecure and self sacrificing and also just SECRETLY ONE OF THE KINDEST MOST COMPASSIONATE MEMBERS OF THE CREW? notice how none of these have to do with his pervert shtick lmao

i do actually like his woman thing to an extent, i think its cute when its just him having heart eyes at every woman he sees and being weak to literally any woman who looks at him- cause that's still putting women on a pedestal, but its a fairly harmless character flaw for a fictional character to have. pre-timeskip sanji is a gift for all these reasons. and like, thats when everyone fell in love w his character i think. i MIGHT even forgive his whole "i wont hit a woman" thing bc its not like he doesnt think women shouldnt be hit in general to such an extent (i dont think he ever opposes to anyone else doing it on the crew, HE just doesnt like doing it PERSONALLY bc its his own moral principle he wont break just like the whole wont fight with his hands thing) even if the whole thing stems from the sexist belief women are lesser/weaker (esp after his backstory reveals some stuff)

but the pervert shtick? and the WRITING HIM AS TRANSPHOBIC/HOMOPHOBIC THING?? yea i literally hate that part of his character so much and wish it wasnt added. like i see how it relates to the character oda has decided sanji is but i still dont think it was needed. or okay. lol. i dont think any sanji fan actually likes this part of him. somedays i look at myself in the mirror and i'm like "am i fangirling over a more conventionally attractive bnha mineta rn" and i put on my clown makeup

but he's more than that. for all the reasons i listed above. and the BIGGEST thing that keeps me sane as a Sanji Liker (tm) is the fact that i 100% see half of his shitty character traits as something that are a product of Oda, the author, influencing his own work. im not gonna lie that canonly he still gave sanji those traits so yea like as a trans (? still working on that) GNC bisexual woman my favorite character atm is this weird little guy who's kinda chauvinistic and also canonly a homophobe (...at least, to an extent, bc apparently he has a really good relationship with iva? again, i could write an essay on just the queer rep as well) and thats a little embarrassing but. alas. i already fell in love with the character. and if you consider the writing is done by a dude who's got his own issues and just take the character for what he is...i do still rlly enjoy the idiot. and TRUST ME, i will headcanon him as a repressed bisexual who's probably GNC or a little trans or AT LEAST likes to do drag bc c'mon now. oda PUT ALL THAT IN CANON...AND EXPECTS US NOT TO PLAY WITH IT? you could make a compelling argument that he's 1000% straight and cis and kamabakka was a fluke that he resents but i think you could just as easily interpret it the other way. or just say fuck word of god i'm gonna enjoy this character the way i want (draws sanji in a dress for the millionth time bc i can and it makes me feel better. and once again HE WORE ONE IN CANON...AND WAS SMILING ABOUT IT, FOR A WHILE. IDK IDK CALL ME CRAZY) tldr; sanji is fucked but the worst parts are a product of oda himself and i like the character for other reasons and purposely try to consume him very critically for those reasons bc i do still really like him. like. hes my #1 fav character atm unfortunately. but he's nice in a lot of other ways 🥲

SORRY FOR THAT I TALKED WAYYY TOO MUCH!!!! but i enjoyed it so thanks for the opportunity :') im glad ur vibing with op and we're both enjoying this silly little show. tbh half the reason im trying to read it so fast (and why i read WCI early) is bc i was scared my hyperfixation wouldnt last long enough to finish the series BWAHAHA. here's to hoping we both get to see it end and enjoy the journey that comes with that!

[cotccotc]

i feel the same that your anon!! i've went on hiatus for a bit this year and ever since then i've been on this road of wanting to deactivate but not doing it (bc i feel like i will regret it) and then feeling better and start posting again and then feeling awful and wanting to delete everything etc. i think it's also about this feeling that you need to always be active bc if not you lose almost all your engagement (which is extremely demotivating). i remember going on hiatus after writing tcp because i was so burnt out and stressed since i push myself to write it even tho i was having classes and extra curricular stuff all day, everyday because i felt kind of an obligation to do so? like if i post on the teaser that i would realese it this day then it NEEDS to be this day, no matter what. it got to the point that i was super tired to even reply to anons (but i kept doing so, because again, these people took time to talk to me so i should be excited and happy even tho i'm not). but when i came back after taking some time (that was like, a month) my blog was as dead as it could be and i had no anons or notes, which made me feel extremely self conscious about things. after this i just been working on not forcing myself too much and remembering that, even tho i super grateful for the community i've built here and for the people that follows me, this is not a job and i'm here to have fun (therefore is ok to take breaks when i dont feel like posting), overall just trying not to feel too guilty when things don't go as planned. anyway massive rant lol sorry!!

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACKKKKKK it’s kinda tough to admit or talk about bc u don’t want to sound ungrateful …. but it’s definitely still an issue !! i think we’ve all kinda gotten into the habit of expecting more from ourselves than we can offer, maybe. like i started out on tumblr seeing all of these “big” writing blogs posting tons of long fics in (what seems like) a short period of time, or gfx creators being really on top of content w gifs and stuff, so u just naturally assume the whole community is just .. on all the time ! and engagement can have a lot to do w it too. i’ve found that my posts do better at certain times, for certain members, and with a certain amount of relevance (for ex: editing photo shoot pics right after they come out) but a lot of the time, that isn’t practical. and neither is being active w asks and dms all the time !!!

idk the main take away is: we all collectively need to stop giving a FUCK and be COMPLETELY UNHINGED & ACTIVE OR HERMIT-LIKE & LAZY AS WE WANNA BE without any need for explanation 😂

[noitscooldw]

sexting m!kylar hcs

hello everyone!! how do you do! im alli! long time fan first time writer (о´∀`о)

i got inspired by @inkyquince 's sexting w kylar hcs and couldn’tttt help but add on my own h0rny ramblings

so without further adieu, this is ifdolhadcellphones!au

warning: adult content! (obv), afab!pc, breeding and impeg mention

sending

alright so i don't think kylar would send nudes very often but when he does oh boy are they good

gets so hard just thinking abt showing you how much he needs you rn

he wants to prove his love for u and show u how crazy u make him

vids consist of him rubbing himself over his boxers, letting his precum stain and make a mess inside

all you can hear is his sweet little whimpers and mumbling, his breath hot and heavy. he gets a lil too close to the mic sometimes and he almost sounds in pain

lifting up the waistband to reveal his throbbing hard cock, standing up at attention so cute and pathetically

“i-i’ve had this all day..” you can hear him whisper, “all day…”

the camera gets so shaky as he starts desperately pulling on his cock, fucking his precum-covered fist, his small hips moving with the momentum

all he needs to think abt is fucking your sweet little pussy and he’s gone, bursting loads of cum into his hand, imagining going inside your womb

just thinking about cumming in you gets him so riled up, most of his fantasies consist of that anyway but that's a rant for another day :p

but yea, most videos usually end with him moaning your name loudly and cumming all over himself, just for you <3

in terms of d!ck pics, his most common poses are him just holding himself, feeling the weight and heat of his arousal. kinda showcasing his length heh heh (big d kylar supremacy)

also loves to send you pics of the hard ons he gets throughout the day thinking of you, you’re on his mind constantly and he can’t help but get excited, needy in fact

you’ll be at work at the cafe or sumn and get sent a pic of him pulling down his sweats, hard cock straining against his underwear, head leaking through the fabric

“i miss you sooooomuch. when are you going to be home??? i need to see you”

normally would not be so comfortable showing their genitals especially online where anything can get hacked but with you he feels no shame

after all, his body is yours anyways :)

cum pics lovesss sending pics of his cum and how much he came for u “it’s a shame this is going to waste hehe”

makes sure he brings himself right to the brink before he takes a pic so he can look extra needy for u

hands and phone are always sticky

waits on the edge of his seat waiting for u to text back

lowkey regretting it when anxiety hits; what if u don’t like it, what if u find him disgusting and call him a pervert, a freak? maybe he shouldn’t be so forward like this…

but as soon as he hears a ping! and see ur name pop up alongside a sexy pic in return, all his worries wash away

you really are made for him

receiving

kylar is so grateful for modern technology just so you're able to send him nudes

screenshots every single pic you’ve ever sent to him, so you already know he has a whole folder of all ur nudies

definitely password protected and encrypted so no one will ever find them, not on his watch. would go actually insane if that happened.

but you can bet every night he lays down in bed, goes through his favorites (all of them) and just goes to town

definitely cums on his screen to your selfies or any pic of you rlly, like those weird cum tributes on reddit 😭😭

like i said, his phone is very icky and sticky

frothing at the mouth when he gets a sexy pic from you, and always says thank you <3

spends about the next hour and a half furiously jerking off to said pic, whether it’s in the park bathroom or at home in his bed

he just can’t believe he has this in his possession…you’re not sending these to anyone else right???? no no of course not hahha why would you..

still, even the thought of you willingly sending these photos…wanting him to see your body, to see you in such a vulnerable, private state….

ok back to the bathroom

tittie pics has him droooling, he can just feeeel how soft they are through the screen, how sweet they’d taste

“BBEAUTIFUL”

“you lookso amazing my darling!!!!!

“so pretty and perfect and alllll mine”

“cant imgaine how theyd look nice and full of milk…..”

“i want th em in my mouth…please....”

pussy pics have his mouth salivating and his dick trying to escape out of his pants

"FFFGFHFJ Mmmlslfkfkfkfkffiuu"

“holyyyyshitttt hhaaha omgggg!!!!”

“all miNe to Breeed all mine onlyy mine!”

“DONOT show this to anyone okay???????”

"iloveyousofuckingmuch"

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Sugar, Sugar 15

[FIFTEEN/END]

MASTERLIST

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape, violence, mean sugary Steve

This is a dark! sugar daddy! Steve fic. Obvious AU so please keep that in mind. :) That being said, it will be an explicit fic (18+) with noncon. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

(This chapter: violence, threats, fear  :O)

Series Summary: The reader is struggling in the big city but find opportunity before her. Will she take it?

This Chapter: The wedding day approaches but not everything goes to plan.

Author Notes: So this is another series wrapped up after a grueling two years, haha. Sorry y’all.

Please let me know what you think, like and reblog <3 love ya

🍭 🍭 🍭

The floor length mirror was trimmed with twisted gold. You stared at your reflection as your shaky hands pressed against the front of the ivory dress. The cut hid the small bump but you could not forget it. Ever since you confessed, it all happened so fast; the wedding was pushed up, the dress tailored and expedited, and invitations sent out in a rush.

It all felt surreal. The day had come but you just couldn’t accept it. How could you go through those doors and smile through it all?

You closed your eyes and let your breath out. They would knock when it was your time. Your father would be waiting to walk you down the aisle. The guests waited eagerly for the most talked about ceremony in the city. And you still felt like just a footnote in your own wedding.

You moved away from the mirror and sat unsteadily, gripping the arms of the cushioned chair, careful not to catch your veil under you. That night you told him, that was the final straw. But you didn’t forget what Sasha said. You took a picture of the broken door and wrote down the entire scene. You sent it to yourself in an email as proof.

That wasn’t the last time. You recorded Steve one day when he came in as you were texting your sister about the new date. You hadn’t answered his last message about your first appointment with the doctor. He was livid and you sat and listened to him rant as the red dots pulsed. You wrote down every instance, every time he made you appease him, every terrifying word.

Then there were the police reports. Nothing more than words in a filing cabinet but the night he choked you was just the beginning. He threatened to break your finger when you took your ring off because your hands were swelling. Then he broke your laptop when you didn’t pay him enough attention. 

As the wedding loomed closer, he only seemed to get worse. He was clingy, always touching you, marveling over your stomach. He checked in almost every hour on the hour when he was working, and you weren’t stupid enough not to notice that the building was being watched.

It was like you were living two lives and yet you were entirely trapped with him. What good could the emails do? Or the reports when the police wouldn’t act on them? You were going to marry this man and that would be the end of it; of you, of your life.

Knuckles tapped on the door and you stood. You crossed the room and inched it open the door. You flinched as you were met by an unexpected and uninvited guest.

“Sasha?” you gasped.

“You’re marrying him then?” he held the handle but you didn’t try to close the door, “the account gone, I heard nothing from you.”

“I… I’m scared,” you admitted, “when he found out, I thought he was going to--” you shook your head. He wouldn’t actually kill you.

“You know it’s not too late,” Sasha urged.

“You can’t be here, it he finds out, he’ll--”

“I’ll defend myself,” Sasha snarled uncharacteristically, “I’ll give him what he deserves.’

“No, I don’t want you to get hurt. You need to go,” you begged as you glanced past him furtively.

“I will. Come with me,” he said, “just go. Everyone’s distracted, they won’t know--”

“I can’t just leave. You don’t understand--”

“No, you don’t understand,” he argued, “if you marry him, it all gets so much more complicated. I told you that day at the café. It will be harder to fight after the vows, but right now, you can still get out.”

“And go where?”

He swallowed and looked down the hall. You could hear the distant murmur of the crowd.

“Did you do any of it? Keep a journal? Something?” he asked.

“I tried. I went to the police but nothing,” you sniffed and gripped the door tight.

“Nothing yet but that’s a start,” he chewed the inside of his lip.

“Why are you here? Why is this so important to you?”

“Because I can do something,” he hissed, “because I can’t live with it if I don’t. So come on. Come with me, I got a bigger place. It’ll have to do for now and then we’ll work on getting you standing, getting the baby somewhere to grow--”

“Am I trading him for you?”

“I’m your friend,” he said evenly, “that will never change. All I want is you safe. If it makes you feel better, I’ll sleep in the hall. You can lock me out and I’ll sleep against the door. But I came down here knowing I wouldn’t leave without you.”

“It’s a sweet fantasy but--”

“Come on,” he grabbed your hand and pushed the door open, “please, don’t go with him. It doesn’t end well. You don’t get out. It doesn’t get better.”

“I have nothing,” you quavered.

“You have me,” he said, “please don’t make me walk out of here alone.”

“I….” you uttered as your heart squeezed. “He’ll come after you.”

“Good, I want him to,” he clung to you, “please?”

You inhaled and heard the voices. Your father and your sister. You had no time to think but you knew it was your only chance.

“Let’s go,” you lifted your skirt and pulled the door shut behind you as you stepped out, “now.”

He held onto your hand as you rushed away from the voices and skirted around the corner. Sasha urged you on down the back stairs and through the maze like halls of the extravagant church. You nearly tumbled down the stairs and he caught you as you came along the narrow passage beside the main room, the guests and groom just on the other side of the wall.

You came out into the sunlight and Sasha lifted the train of your skirts as he directed you over the grass. our heels sank into the dirt as you rushed over and the organ began to play Here Comes the Bride. As he helped stuff the swathes of fabric in behind you in his modest car, the music stopped suddenly.

He closed the door as you were squished in the back seat amid your layered skirts and he got in the front. The engine turned and he nearly side swept another car as he pulled out without looking. You peeked back behind you but saw no one coming down the large steps of the church.

He turned the corner and sidled in behind a yellow cab. He looked at you in the mirror and nodded. You bit your lips nervously as reality sank in. Your chest hammered and your entire body buzzed with adrenaline. You knew it was only the beginning.

🍭

The day passed in a daze. You sat in your wedding dress waiting for all hell to break loose. Sasha sat with a beer, silently, and tapped his foot endlessly. When the silence was too much, he turned on the television but neither of you paid any attention to the old sitcom.

When the trance of disbelief dissipated, he showed you around his spacious loft. He was being paid well by Stark but you worried how long he would stay on the payroll after what he’d done. Steve wasn’t stupid and there were more photographers at the church then you’d seen collectively over the last year and a half.

“This is the second bedroom,” he showed you into a room with gleaming windows. There was a bed, a dresser, curtains, a cozy rug, all carefully selected, “I thought you’d be here sooner.”

Your eyes lingered on the box leaned against the far wall. A crib.

“Didn’t know how long…” his voice trailed off as he followed your eye line, “I’m not trying to be him. You can go anytime but I… you have a place here.”

Your eyes welled and you blotted them with your knuckles, the rough lace of your gloves scratching your cheeks, “you did all this for me?”

“I told you, I’d do anything,” he said.

“But… Sasha, I don’t--”

“I don’t expect anything from you. High school was a long time ago but you made it bearable for the biggest dweeb in the class.” He sighed and paced a circle around the room, “you know, I had the biggest crush on you. That doesn’t mean anything now, it doesn’t mean I want you to fall into my arms, but it means I want to help you. It’s the right thing to do, somehow I made a career of doing the right thing so what’s one more?”

You felt your chest sink and you covered your cheeks with your hands, “Sasha?”

“Please,” he cringed, “I was a teen boy, I think I had a thing for Oprah once. Really, it’s just… we’re friends. We’ll always be friends.”

“I can’t…” you sniffled and dropped your hands, “I don’t deserve any of this.”

“He doesn’t deserve you,” Sasha intoned, “and you don’t deserve to live like that. I know this isn’t much but I know you. You’ll find your way, you just got a little lost.”

“I…” you shook your head speechless.

“We’ll figure everything else out tomorrow. You can borrow some of my clothes for tonight and then we can see about retrieving your things from Steve,” he neared the door and stopped beside you, “or we can say fuck it and you can start all over.”

You turned and slung your arms around him. You buried your face against his shoulder as tears spilled out onto his jacket.

“How did you know?” you sobbed.

“That day at the shower,” he rubbed your back gently, “you know, lawyers learn how to read people and you never were very good at subtlety.”

“No,” you chuckled through your tears, “No, it’s why I was great as a bard.”

“Mmm,” he grumbled, “if that’s how you remember it.”

🍭

It felt like Sasha was gone forever but when you checked the clock, it had only been twenty minutes. 

You sat on the couch with your feet under you as you watched the news and rocked nervously. All anyone was talking about was Steve Rogers’ runaway bride. Your face was everywhere and the statement issued by Steve made it all the worse.

He painted you as a gold-digger, as an adulterer, as a swindler. He was the heartbroken fiancé and you were the wrongdoer. You knew it would go this way but expectation never softened reality.

You flinched as the lock turned and Sasha entered with a bag in hand. He came to the couch and set it down beside you.

“I don’t know about my taste in women's clothes but those should do,” he said as he checked his watch, “we should go soon.”

“Yeah,” you stood and opened the bag to reveal the lavender blouse and dark jeans, “you really didn’t have to--”

“You kidding, he’s gonna be surrounded by cameras. You can’t win his game if you don’t play it. I’ve dealt with his type before, they’re the ones who need lawyers on standby,” he sneered, “did you eat?”

“Yeah, thanks,” you swiped up the bag and headed for the hallway, “it was good.”

“No problem,” he shrugged as he grabbed the remote and shut off the tv, “and ignore all that nonsense.”

You got dressed and emerged as your anxiety grew to impatience. You left the apartment in brittle silence and the car ride fed the uneasy bubbling of your stomach. .

As you came up to Steve’s building, you sat for a moment before you got out. Sasha followed and shoulder away the cameras as you neared the front door

The elevator moved slowly and fidgeted uncontrollably as it dinged on Steve’s floor. You swallowed and braced yourself to face Steve. Sasha kept a few feet back as you walked down the hall and stopped at the door. You knocked as you found it locked.

It was a while before it opened but when it did, you were startled as Steve grabbed the front of your blouse and wrenched you inside. He spun you but quickly released you as he was knocked off balance and sent sprawling over the floor. Sasha stood above him with his hands in fists.

“Hey,” he pointed at Steve then looked at you, “you okay?”

You nodded as Steve glared between the two of you and cautiously got to his feet, “so you brought your little boyfriend?”

“She’s here to get her stuff. We thought we’d avoid a police escort, as her lawyer I thought it prudent, but we can always make that phone call,” Sasha said sternly, “she is entitled to her possessions.”

“Her stuff? I paid for every single thing she has to her name. Hers? Mine.” Steve spat and reared on you again, only to be caught by Sasha as he inserted himself between you.

“You will not touch her again. Those things you bought for her were gifts. You have no legal rights to them once they are given. She will take her clothes, her phone, and any other necessities.”

“Pfft, she’s not taking anything. She’s not going anywhere,” Steve growled, “she not yours--”

“I am certain the photogs would appreciate a show,” Sasha pulled out his phone, “police? That can only be a domestic dispute.”

Steve squinted and his nose flared as he looked at you over Sasha’s shoulder, “fucking slut.” He crossed his arms and stepped aside, “get your shit, get out…” he hissed, “but I have my rights too. You will not keep me from my baby.”

“That will be settled in court,” Sasha replied coolly, “go on, get your things.”

He waved you past him as he kept you shield from Steve. He was of a height with Steve but not as broad. Even so, you felt safe behind him. You rushed down to the bedroom and quickly gathered up your toiletries and those clothes you didn’t absolutely hate. Your phone screen was shattered but you took it anyway.

As you emerged again, a bag slung on your shoulder, you slid the ring from your finger. 

“You can keep the rest,” you said as you placed the band on the small round table just inside the front room, “goodbye Steve.”

“Goodbye? Goodbye?” he spat, “this isn’t the end and you fucking know it.”

“Calm down,” Sasha warned.

“You don’t tell me what to do,” Steve shoved him, “I should fucking smash your head in--”

“I’d like you to try,” Sasha stood his ground, “really. You think the court would let a violent man be around an infant?”

Steve scoffed and rolled his eyes. He backed down and shouldered by Sasha. “Get the fuck out.”

You left quickly. You had no desire to hang around. As you stepped onto the elevator, Sasha softly touched your elbow and you winced. The bag fell to your elbow and he quickly scooped it up and heaved it over his own shoulder.

“You okay?” he asked.

“No, I don’t think so,” you said, “he was so angry. I--”

“I was stupid, we should’ve brought the police. Fuck the cameras,” he said, “from this point on, no contact with him whatsoever. Only through me and the court. No talking to reporters, no nothing.”

“Yeah, that won’t be hard,” you uttered as he led you out of the elevator. 

As you came outside, cameras flashed and voices called out. You collided with Sasha as he was blocked by a photographer shouting questions, “is it true you’re pregnant? Is it Steve’s?”

“My client will not be answering questions,” Sasha kept on and made a path for you, “go, she’s not answering any of your questions.”

He elbowed past more cameras and opened the car door for you. You fell inside and quickly huddled down in your seat. As he sat behind the wheel, he mumbled and pulled out into traffic. He gripped the wheel tightly and pushed himself back into the vinyl.

“That asshole,” he said, “he’s gonna want the paternity test. This isn’t gonna be pretty.”

“I can’t… he fucking told them. I mean, I’m not surprised but… god,” you grimaced.

“We’ll get the test done before he makes a formal request,” Sasha said, “it shows transparency and when we hand over those results, we’ll include those police reports too.”

“Police reports?” you blinked.

“Sorry, I… It’s a suggestion,” he said tersely, “but he’s going to make this a trial by media.”

“No, no, I want to,” you said firmly, “I want everyone to know the real Steve Rogers.”

🍭

‘I was just like many struggling in the city. I worked a low-paying job in data entry and lived in an apartment which was little more than a box. The dreams of the big city were passing me by as there was little opportunity to be found.

Then I met Steve Rogers. Like a dream or a Lifetime movie. I was in debt, I was desperate, and he offered me a safety net. I can own my part in the relationship; I was interested and I accepted his generosity. I was all too happy with the arrangement.

That was until I found out that it was all based on a lie. I didn’t know that he had access to my accounts even before I knew him, that he had used his connections to force me into that dire situation. And I could not know the real man behind the billionaire façade.

It was little things at first. Any woman loves to feel wanted but his possessiveness soon turned to control. He kept me isolated from my own family and did not permit me to do anything without his permission. His affection turned to obsession and when it was not reciprocated he forced it from me.

He took me on vacation and did not allow me to wear clothes. He chose what I wore, how I looked, and what I did. He coerced me into acts I was reluctant about, and when he was too rough, he did not listen to my pleas for him to stop.

When I tried to leave him, he followed me and dragged me back. He had me watched by PIs and surveilled all my communications. He used his financial power to control me and when that did not work, he used his physical power.

Steve Rogers abused me. He yelled in my face, he threatened my family, and he choked me.

Steve Rogers raped me. He expected me to bend to his will whenever he desired and when I refused, he held me down and did what he wanted.

Steve Rogers took my whole life and when I chose to leave, he set his eyes on the life inside of me. 

The only thing I want from him is freedom. I want to live safely with my child and I want that child to never experience the abuse of their father. I never want anyone to know that horror again which is why I have written this and released the police records. I am not asking for anything but peace for me and my unborn child.’

The statement was carefully edited by Sasha. You reread the font across the glossy pages of Vanity Fair, the article spliced with excerpts not only from the police reports, but your own emailed accounts of your relationship, and the whole thing began with an image of that broken bathroom door.

It was two months since you ran away from the altar but life was not a romcom. It was a disaster. Even with the article, you knew not all would believe you. You knew it would open you to doubt and vitriol. And you knew Steve would have a response.

You closed the magazine and groaned as you rubbed your hips. Freedom didn’t feel so… freeing. There was a long way to go; court dates, doctor’s appointment, and depositions. But it was a start.

You rested your hand on your stomach and pushed on the arm of the couch as you stood stiffly. When you were halfway up, you felt a hand on your elbow and Sasha helped you stand straight. You smiled guiltily. You’d grown a lot in the last few weeks and still had nearly four months to go.

“The reviews are good,” he said, “I know that is kinda grim but… people seem to believe you.”

“Seem to?” you echoed as you went to the kitchen and pulled out the container of sliced strawberries, “or they don’t?”

“Well,” he leaned on the counter as he watched you add too much cream to the berries and smiled, “Stark Industries has cut ties with Shield, Inc. and Tony has made a sizeable donation to several shelters across the city,” he cupped his chin coyly as he leaned on his elbow, “and will be covering legal costs for the support hearings seeing as I can’t legally represent you anymore.”

“Oh,” your mouth fell open before you could spray some cream onto your tongue, “when were you going to tell me this?”

“I’m telling you now,” he crossed his arms as he shifted them further over the island, “I thought I’d give the good news first.”

“And the bad?” you put down the can of cream as you neared the marble across from him.

“I have several requests for interviews and I think you should do at least one,” he said, “I know you hate reporters and all that but… with a little Rogers baby on board, it’s just another part of the process.”

“Oh, and what should I tell them,” you edged around the counter towards him, “that I moved? That I found someone better?” He turned to you, his lips curved as he leaned in and you turned your face up to peck his lips, “or maybe I should tell them I’m single? Keep the intrigue?”

“As long as you tell them I’m handsome, I don’t mind,” he purred as he placed his hand on your side.

“Oh, how could I leave that out?” you cooed and kissed him again, “patient, loving, kind… but what a geek?”

“A geek?” he smirked and framed your chin with his hands, “says the dungeon master.”

You giggled and ran your hands up his chest, “someone’s gotta raise this little bard well.”

“Oh, no, no, she’s not gonna be a bard. Maybe a cleric?”

“No way! That’s lame,” you chirped, “how about… a sorcerer? Ours is a bit lacking.”

“Excuse you,” he quipped, “what was your AC again? Maybe next session I’ll run out of healing spells.”

“See?” you taunted, “geek.”

You drew him to you until he was pressed to your belly and he swept you up in a kiss. You rocked with him as he turned you against the counter and slowly parted.

You squeezed his wrist as you went back around to your strawberries and cream. You took a spoon and scooped up a mouthful as you slid your phone towards you. Sasha stayed as he was, watching you scroll through the emails and piled up texts.

You stopped as one blared in all caps. There was no name, only ‘Private’. You opened the conversation and found a dozen bubbles; ‘THIS ISN’T OVER’, ‘HE CAN’T KEEP YOUR FROM ME��, ‘CUTE, YOU THINK PEOPLE BELIEVE YOUR SHIT.’ Another message blipped up, an image and you dropped your spoon as it opened.

You saw the picture of your sister and her son. You shook as you put your hand down on the counter and choked on the cream.

“What?” Sasha reached over and turned your phone to him, “Shit,” he sighed and blocked the number, “he’s just stacking the evidence against himself.”

“I--” you blinked as tears boiled behind your eyes.

“You don’t need to be afraid,” he screencapped the conversation, “this just makes the case even easier.”

“No, I will always be afraid of him,” you said as you touched your stomach, “it’s not just about me anymore.”

“And it’s not just you anymore,” he took your hand and rubbed the back of it with his thumb, “we’ve been through worse. If we can get through a cave full of orcs, we can defeat Steve Rogers.”

END (or is it?)

[jammatown919]

Best Laid Plans

Several months ago, an anon asked me to write a piece in which the group tries to play matchmaker for Ruby and Penny. This is what that turned into. 

Ruby liked Vacuo better than she'd thought she would. Sure, it was unbearably hot most days and a fair amount of the locals seemed rather disgruntled about having more refugees around, especially Atlesian ones,  but she'd take this over Atlas any day.

She was especially relived that she and her group had been allowed to enroll as students at Shade Academy rather than having their Huntsmen licenses renewed. They hadn't been at all ready for the position when General Ironwood had offered it to them, and while there was still a lot to worry about, everyone was glad to have some of the pressure taken off of them. Unfortunately, however, the lowered stress and extra free time had given them an opportunity to concern themselves with things that absolutely did not require their attention, such as Ruby's love life.

Two weeks ago, Ruby had made the horrible mistake of confiding in Yang about her crush on Penny, which had resulted in most of the rest of their friends knowing about it too. Most of them were alright about it, but Yang and Nora were absolutely hellbent on playing matchmaker, and they weren't taking no for an answer.

Every single time one of them caught Ruby alone, they'd plead with her for permission to set up a date so everyone wouldn't have to watch her 'pining' anymore, and no matter how many times she said she didn't want to burden Penny with her feelings, they persisted. Eventually she'd started trying to avoid them altogether, which was a lot easier with Nora than it was with Yang, considering they shared a room.

On their second Friday living at Shade Academy, also the second Friday since Ruby had confided in her sister, Yang found Ruby alone in the dorm and made what felt like her millionth plea of the week.

"For the last time," Ruby snapped, flopping down on her bed. "I don't want you to set up a date! It'll just make everything awkward."

She was trying to keep her cool, but honestly, this was starting to piss her off. This was none of Yang's business, or Nora's for that matter. She didn't need their input.

"Oh, come on, Ruby!" Yang groaned, her voice laced with exasperation. "You have to know she's into you!"

"Give me one good reason to believe she actually likes me back." Ruby retorted, rolling her eyes as Yang let out a dry laugh.

"I'll give you ten reasons," she said confidently. "You two are basically attached at the hip, she gets that little pouty face every time she gets told she can't pair with you for combat training, you literally share a bed-"

"Only because there weren't enough beds when we moved in!" Ruby quickly sat up, warmth rushing to her face.

"Yeah, but when Blake and I starting sharing, I asked Penny if she wanted my old bed and she just about cried." Yang replied. "Unless you want to sit here and argue that all of that is platonic, you know she likes you back. So why won't you just talk to her about it?"

"Look," Ruby sighed. "Even if you're right, I just don't want to give her anything else to worry about. She just lost her home, she's still getting used to being the Winter Maiden, and now she has all this human stuff to deal with. She needs my support right now, and I don't want to accidentally push her away."

Yang's expression softened at that, and she slowly crossed the room to sit down beside Ruby.

"I get that," she said quietly, suddenly much more sympathetic than frustrated. "And I know I'm being kind of pushy, but I don't want you to miss out. This could be your only chance for a while to actually go on dates and have fun with her."

Ruby let out another, heavier sigh and leaned back onto her hands, tilting her face toward the ceiling.

Yang was right. They might have a respite now, but Salem could show up any day. This chance to be students again wasn't going to last forever. They were getting to be kids one last time, and that would be over the moment Salem made herself known again. Then there would be no dates or time to worry about feelings, probably just regrets if she didn't do this now.

"What do I even say to her?" she asked quietly. "I've never liked someone like this before. What if I screw something up?"

"Just be honest with her." Yang put an arm around Ruby's shoulders and gave her a gentle squeeze. "Tell her how you feel, ask her if she wants to go out, and let Nora and I take care of the rest. We'll find a nice place for you to go, and I'll tell you everything I know about impressing girls."

She winked good-naturedly and released Ruby, who then took a deep breath and stood. She didn't feel even remotely prepared for this, but there was a decent chance it could be now or never.

"I'm gonna go see if I can find her." Ruby decided, steeling herself. She made her way toward the door, giving her sister a nervous grin over her shoulder as she left. "Wish me luck."

---------------------

Ruby found Penny an hour later in Shade's library, sitting at one of the tables with a pile of books. From the looks of it, she'd been here a while, possibly making her way through a series.

"Hey," Ruby said quietly as she reached Penny's table. "What are you reading?"

Penny glanced up, looking mildly startled.

"Oh, it's just a fantasy story," she replied sheepishly, lowering the book in her hands. "It's a bit silly, but I've never had time to just sit and read before. I'm finding it quite enjoyable!"

"That's good." Ruby smiled and took a seat across from Penny, clasping her hands anxiously in her lap. "Sorry if I'm interrupting you or anything, I just wanted to ask you something."

"Of course." Penny put her book down and leaned forward attentively.

"I was just wondering if, um..." Ruby squeezed her fingers, trying to steady her voice long enough to get the question out. "If you wanted to... go out with me sometime? Like, on a date? I-If not, it's totally cool, I just... y'know..."

Penny blinked at her slowly, and Ruby shrank back as much as the chair would allow her to.

"A date?" Penny inquired.

"Yeah," Ruby replied, her face burning. Dear God please let her know what a date is, she thought frantically. "I really like you, like more than just a friend. I've been wanting to tell you for a while, but I was scared of making you uncomfortable, but then I realized that with everything going on I might not get another chance for a while, and- Penny?"

Caught up in her rant, it had taken Ruby far to long to realize that Penny wasn't listening to her. Instead, she was just staring blankly, her expression completely unreadable.

"Are you okay?" Ruby leaned across the table and waved her hand in front of Penny's face. "Are you bluescreening?"

Back when she'd had a mechanical body, Penny had occasionally 'bluescreened' when struggling to process some new piece of information. She usually snapped out of it within a few minutes, so Ruby wasn't particularly concerned, but she had to admit she was surprised that Penny was still doing it even in a human body.

"Yes." Penny said suddenly, shaking herself a bit.

"I- what?"

"Yes, I will go on a date with you." Penny clarified, her face turning slightly pink. "I like you too, quite a lot."

"Really?" Ruby's shoulders sagged with relief, and she couldn't help the grin spreading across her face.

"Of course." Penny said with a little smile. "I would have said something much sooner if I had thought you might feel the same way."

"How could I not?" Ruby asked softly. "You're so sweet and beautiful and kind. It was kind of impossible not to fall in love with you."

Penny's blush intensified, and she looked away bashfully.

"You are all of those things too." she replied, her voice quiet and shy.

Ruby chuckled softly, then straightened herself and cleared her throat before either them could get any more flustered.

"So," she went on. "I was thinking maybe we could do dinner tomorrow around six? Or, well, Yang was thinking that, but I have no idea how to plan dates so I'm just listening to what she says."

"That sounds perfect." Penny said enthusiastically.

"Great," Ruby smiled and rose from her seat. "I'll let you get back to your reading. See you tomorrow."

Ruby turned to leave, barely hearing Penny's quiet "Goodnight," as she rushed out of the library. The moment the doors slammed shut behind her, she let out a loud, shaky laugh. She'd done it. She'd actually done it. She'd managed to land herself a date, and now all she had to do was survive it.

--------------------

Penny had to admit, she'd been surprised to hear that her best friend had a crush on her. Delighted, of course, but so very surprised. She'd been planning to keep her own feelings a secret forever, lest Ruby find them unusual or inappropriate, but that was no longer necessary. Ruby shared the same feelings, and apparently they were quite normal.

It was a relief to know that, but Penny couldn't say that all of her anxieties had been quelled. According to Ruby, the next step after confessing their feelings was going on a date together, a concept with which Penny was not particularly familiar. She had a basic idea of how it was supposed to work, but she wasn't sure of the correct way to behave or what she was supposed to say while they were out.

Penny had gone to Nora with these concerns, hoping for some friendly advice, and had been promptly and quite literally dragged into Team JNPR's dorm room for a pre-date pep talk.

"You really don't have all that much to worry about." Nora said as she worked on lacing up the back of Penny's dress. It was quite similar to one she'd worn to Beacon's dance; light green, knee-length, and very soft. She'd borrowed it from an upperclassman named Velvet, who she knew by association due to her team's friendship with Team RWBY.

"But what if I say something wrong?" Penny asked anxiously, running her fingers through her hair. She'd already brushed through it twice, but perhaps one more time couldn't hurt.

"What would you say wrong?" Nora inquired as she finished with the dress. "You two are already friends, so you don't have to deal with any of that 'getting to know each other' business. Just go and have fun. And make sure you laugh at all her jokes."

"All of them?" Penny echoed unenthusiastically. Her sense of humor was quite different from the majority of her friends, and she sometimes had trouble discerning whether something was a joke. How would she know what to laugh at?

"Unless they're offensive or something, but it's Ruby so I doubt that." Nora shrugged and grabbed a bit of Penny's hair, gently fluffing it out. "Think you're ready?"

"Maybe?" Penny replied. "Do I look presentable?"

"You're gorgeous, Pebbles." Nora turned Penny around so they were face to face, placing two firm, comforting hands on her friend's shoulders. "Everything's gonna be fine, okay? You've gone places with Ruby hundreds of times; just act how you normally would."

"Okay." Penny nodded. She could do that.

----------------

The restaurant Penny had been invited to was a small café hardly a stone's throw from Shade's campus. From what Penny could tell, it seemed to be primarily frequented by the school's students, as the majority of the people sitting in the outdoor area were wearing school uniforms.

Of the three that were not, one was Ruby, clad in a black top and bright red skirt that just barely reached her knees. She spotted Penny from her table near the café's front window and waved her over with a shy smile.

"Hey," she greeted softly as Penny approached. "You look really nice."

"As do you." Penny replied politely, sincerely hoping that the grin on her face didn't look too silly. She stood there awkwardly for a moment before taking a seat, leaning forward so their table's umbrella could better protect her fair skin from the sun.

For a good two minutes, they sat there in silence, Ruby seemingly avoiding eye contact and Penny quietly fidgeting while she tried to think of something to say.

"This place is pretty cool, right?" Ruby offered at last, glancing in Penny's direction.

"I think it's quite hot, actually." Penny replied. Ruby let out a soft chuckle, and she quickly realized her mistake. "Oh! You meant- yes, it's very cool."

Penny briefly averted her gaze as her face grew warm, but she was saved from any further embarrassment by the arrival of a tired-looking waitress.

"Have you two decided on anything?" she asked, placing two glasses of water down on the table. As she did so, she fixed Penny with the same vaguely suspicious look every Atlesian refugee had been receiving from the locals.

It wasn't entirely uncalled for, considering everything her nation had done to theirs, but it made her uncomfortable nonetheless.

"Um..." Penny glanced down at the menu, eager to get the waitress's eyes off of her. Impulsively, she ordered the first thing she saw. "The fried scorpion, please."

"I'll have the same." Ruby said immediately.

"Interesting choice." The waitress remarked as she took their menus. 'For a couple of outsiders' was implied.

Penny watched her walk away, mildly dreading the sight of what she would return with.

"What the hell did we just order?" Ruby mumbled, so softly that Penny couldn't be entirely certain the words were for her.

"It will likely be fine," she answered anyway. "Scorpion is a common dish here."

"Yeah, I guess." Ruby replied, once again avoiding eye contact. Penny's brow furrowed and she leaned a bit closer to her date over the table.

Ruby seemed remarkably uncomfortable, wringing her hands and glancing about as if searching for a way out of the situation. Did she not want to be here? Had Penny done something wrong?

If so, she hadn't the slightest clue what her mistake could have been, but relationships were so complicated that she wouldn't be surprised if she'd broken some unspoken rule. Perhaps she'd missed a joke she was supposed to laugh at, or-

"Penny?"

Penny was jolted out of her thoughts, only just realizing that Ruby was waving a hand in front of her face. She blinked hard, mildly startled.

"Are you okay?" Ruby asked gently.

"Yes," Penny said with a quick nod. "Yes, I'm fine."

"You've got to stop bluescreening on me." Ruby gave her a small, kind smile. "What were you trying to figure out?"

Penny hesitated briefly. She almost didn't want to say it for fear that she might be right. Yet again, if she had somehow messed up the date, she wanted to know what she'd done wrong.

"It's just..." she began eventually. "You seem as if you don't want to be here. I was wondering if maybe I did something wrong? Or if you regret asking me out?"

"Of course not!" Ruby's eyes widened in mild alarm. "What made you think that?"

"You just seem so uncomfortable." For emphasis, Penny mimicked the hand-wringing motion Ruby had been doing. "I was worried you thought this was a mistake."

"God, no," Ruby reached across the table and gently took Penny's hands in her own. "You didn't do anything wrong, Penny. Asking you out was not a mistake."

She brushed her thumbs along the backs of Penny's hands; an intimate gesture, if Penny remembered correctly.

"I think letting someone else plan this for us might have been a mistake, though." Ruby admitted. "I don't think I'm really a dinner date person."

"What do you mean?" Penny inquired.

"I mean this all feels a little... stuffy, I guess." Ruby shrugged. "I don't like sitting here in formalwear trying to make awkward conversation with a bunch of other people around. This doesn't feel like us, y'know?"

"I think I understand." Penny nodded slowly. She had to admit, this wouldn't have been her first choice of venue either. "What do you think would feel like us?"

"Do you remember that night with the fireflies?" Ruby asked. Penny nodded again, a small smile spreading across her face. "That felt like us. It was just you and me having fun, enjoying nature and stuff."

"That was a very special night," Penny agreed fondly. "But I do not believe we would be able to recreate it here. As far as I know, no species of a firefly is native to Vacuo."

"It doesn't have to be exactly the same." Ruby seemed thoughtful for a moment, quietly drumming her fingers on the table. "What if we went up on the roof of Shade's dorms? We could be alone and just enjoy each other's company."

"I like the sound of that." Penny almost stood up, but suddenly remembered that they'd already ordered. Would it be considered rude to leave?

"It's alright," Ruby seemed to read Penny's mind as she rose from her seat. "I don't think it counts as dining and dashing if we haven't gotten our food yet."

Penny supposed that made sense. She hesitated a moment longer before standing up, glad that she wouldn't have to see that waitress again. Ruby extended her arm, and Penny linked it with her own as they began walking away from the restaurant. As soon as they'd cleared the tables, Ruby visibly relaxed.

"This already feels better," she remarked.

"It does." Penny agreed. They walked together in silence for a few minutes, Penny's face growing warm as an unfamiliar sensation spread throughout her body.

Suddenly overtaken with boldness, Penny leaned over and pressed her lips to Ruby's cheek, holding them there for a moment before slowly pulling away. Ruby's eyes widened in surprise, but she didn't seem at all bothered.

"Was that... okay?"

"It was more than okay," Ruby replied, glancing over at Penny with a smile. "That was perfect."

"It seems our night has been salvaged." Penny smiled back at her, faltering briefly as Ruby rested her head on her shoulder.

"Yeah," she said, her warm breath tickling the skin of Penny's neck. "It has."

--

If you enjoyed this piece, please consider reblogging to share it with others and help the post gain a bit of traction! It would absolutely make my day and make the three months I spent trying to finish this feel worth it! 

[writing-in-april]

Guest Lecturer

Spencer Reid x Female Reader

Summary: Reader gets Spencer riled up during class while he’s guest lecturing.

A/N: This is my 6th fic for my 750 follower celebration! This one kind of got away from me and I’ve been second guessing what I wrote all day lmao- I also imagine this as like season 9/10 Spencer. Thank you again to @spencers-dria who listens to all my rants about my writing AND gave me this idea. She’s amazing, everyone should go check out her fics.

Warnings: 18+, Established FWB relationship, Teasing in public, Spencer gets an untimely boner, Oral sex (M receiving), Unprotected sex, Degradation, Creampie

Main Masterlist Word count: 1.6k

“One of the earliest modern theories about criminology stated that criminals couldn’t help it—they were simply born that way. Cesare Lombroso came up with the theory, which he called “The Criminal Man,” in the late 19th century. Lombroso’s theory helped to unify criminal traits and identification (while also perhaps not paying enough attention to upbringing and environment as criminal factors).”

Whenever I invited Spencer to guest lecture in the criminology course I taught I got even more excited to do my job. The way he delivered every lecture sucked me in immediately, my full attention completely on him.

Today however, was different. The lecture I had invited him to do on the early history of the subject was material I had heard millions of times before as an educator. My mind was wandering more than usual and it had specifically wandered to observing how good Dr. Reid looked today. The two of us weren’t officially together, but all the late nights we both spent at each other’s apartments were not just to ‘hang out’.

I decided to tease him a little, to put my distracted mind to good use, after all he did something similar last week. I was sitting in the back of the relatively small lecture hall, but I knew of ways I could get Spencer’s eyes on me within an instant.

He was rambling on about the flaws in early criminology theories when I started to unbutton and shuck off my blazer. It was an innocent act that any wandering eyes of my students would not question, but the way I purposefully slightly traced over the edges of my bra was sure to get Spencer’s attention.

“S-sorrry class, I lost my train of thought.” I smirked as he stumbled over his words, he was so easy. He picked the lecture back up swiftly after that, though perhaps he was rambling a bit faster than before.

I was unsatisfied, so I continued on in my pursuit to make Spencer blush. I made a show of how I started to unbutton my blouse, but only the first two, I wasn’t trying to get fired here. The top two buttons, however small, served their purpose. When unbuttoned, they showed just enough of my chest that Spencer again started stuttering. My students were rather used to his stuttering, he’d often get talking so fast that he’d trip over his words and have to start the sentence over again. Knowing that in this case, his stuttering was for a different reason made my panties start to dampen.

My final tease towards the end of the lecture was to show him how turned on I was just from teasing him. I looked to make sure none of my students were just as distracted as I was and had wandering eyes before enacting the final stage of my revenge. I shifted to the side in my seat so my legs were facing halfway into the aisle, then uncrossing them which gave Spencer a good look at my panties. Maybe he would also be able to see the wet spot that had already begun to form, I was so glad I wore a skirt today.

His cheeks were starting to flush a deep red as he tried to casually shuffle behind the podium on the other side of the small stage where he finished the last bit of his lecture. I had no doubt he moved there in an attempt to hide his tightening slacks. I smirked again, mission accomplished.

After the end of his lecture I made my way up to the stage and dispersed my students. Once they had all asked their lingering questions to me and Spencer I turned to him and asked coyly, “Could we go talk in my office, Spencer?”

—-

“Sit down.” I commanded and motioned to my desk chair at the other side of the office. Spencer immediately followed my command, sitting down obediently on the chair with his hands laced together in front of him. “Why were you so distracted today Spencer?”

The flush that had been present earlier returned to his cheeks at my words before he started to stutter out, “You were t-teasing me during the lecture, I just wasn’t expecting it.”

“Well- you teased me last week did you not? After all, who was the poet that said- All is fair in love and war?” I asked while making my way to stand tall over where he was sitting in my chair.

“John Lyly.” He did not stutter this time when he answered my question, but the end of it rose in pitch when I started to get down on my knees. I may have been the one getting down on my knees, but there was no doubt who was the one in charge, me.

“You alright with me being a little rougher with my words today Spencer?” We had talked about rougher degradation before, he had even used harsh words on me before, though I still wanted to make sure that he was ok with it. Once he gave me the go ahead I only had one more thing to say to him before. Got started, “And, make sure to be quiet. We wouldn’t want anyone to hear how loud you are for me, would we?”

He nodded fast at my command, already so desperate for me to get started. I pulled his belt out of the loops then swiftly pulling down his pants and boxers, revealing his hard length to me. I kissed my way up his length, following the already throbbing vein that ran up the side before taking him into my mouth. His hands pulled into fists as I started to bob my head vigorously, also making sure to hollow my cheeks. I then batted his hand away when it involuntarily came to rest on my hand, then grabbed both of his hands to hold them down on the seat of the chair. Then, while holding him down partially I took him as far down my throat as possible, slightly gagging on him. His hips squirmed a little and when I looked up through my lashes I could see him biting down hard on his bottom lip to contain his moans. My own wetness was making me just as desperate as him, I pulled off of him so I could have us both indulge. His hips jerked desperately towards my mouth searching out his release he so desperately wanted. At least he was silently complaining and didn’t break my no noises rule. I spoke with a bite in my tone as I stripped out of my own clothes, “Don’t complain, despite being a desperate little thing you have been good so far, I was going to let you cum inside.” I hovered my dripping pussy over his length, I needed an apology from him before I was to indulge myself.

“I’m sorry…” He whimpered. “Please, let me have you?”

“Since you seem so sorry I’ll let it slide.” I scoffed a little before allowing myself to sink down onto his length. I had to bite my own lip hard as I felt all the ridges of his cock while I slowly sunk down on him, he always filled me so perfectly. As I started to move on top of him slowly I reveled in the way he tried to move underneath me, but the way I sat above him in the desk chair had his hips pinned firmly down.

“What do you think everyone would say if they saw you underneath me? What would they say when they found out that their guest lecturer is such a little whore for their professor?” He mewled loudly at my degrading words, so loudly that I had to clamp your hand over his mouth. “I told you to be quiet, I guess since you’re incapable of following my directions all the way through, I’ll just have to keep my hand here.”

He mewled underneath my hand, not stopping himself from holding back his noises now that my hand was muffling them. I could tell he was getting close, so I sped up the rolling of my hips and increased how harshly I bounced on top of him.

“Cum with me.” I ordered just as I could feel my orgasm beginning to overtake me. Spencer happily took my orders, it only took two more thrusts for him to come apart. He greedily grabbed my hips and slammed me down all the way down onto his length, spilling himself as deep inside me as he could. I would’ve normally chastised him for his greediness, but I was too distracted by the devastating orgasm I was riding out to really care.

After we both rode out our highs I let Spencer bask in the warmth of me for a few minutes before I got up to dole out the aftercare. Aftercare was arguably my favorite part of being with Spencer. I enjoyed my post coital conversations with him immensely and he was also the best at cuddling.

“Do you think your students suspected anything?” The worry in his voice was evident as I cleaned up the evidence of our excursion.

“No I don't think so, and even if they did they wouldn’t say anything, we didn’t do anything that would get me fired.” I hummed and sat down on Spencer’s lap, enveloping him in my warmth. I ran my fingers through his hair loving the way his curls felt through my fingers, I was so glad I didn’t have any more classes I had to teach today. I spoke again, with a little more affection in my tone compared to our normal post coital bliss conversations,“You are my favorite guest lecturer.”

“I’m your favorite guest lecturer?”

I snickered a little bit before answering,“Did I never tell you? You’re actually my only one.”

—-

Tag list (message me if you want to be added):

All works:

@shotarosleftpinky y

Spencer Reid/CM:

@calm-and-doctor @destiny-tsukino o @safertokiss

Sub Spencer:

@thatsonezesty13 @pastathighs @virtualpeanutartisanjudge

[infernalrevenge]

Lady D confronting Y/N who is going to College and has a lot of anxiety and fear(Weird request,lol)

This isn't weird at all! I think everyone who went to college, especially those who had to move far away, would have liked a bit of comfort from someone about going into a new environment. I don't know if this was what you felt, anon, but I hope the comfort of Tall Pseudo-Vampire Lady would suffice.

Side note: I wrote part of this while drinking wine soooooo yeah. Maybe I made some parts to be a little too emotional.

Placed under read more for length (yes I definitely got carried away with this one, again.)

------------

Alcina had been keeping a close eye on you the past few weeks, especially since she was aware of your eventual departure.

You were frazzled and a bundle of nerves, to put it lightly. You constantly went over your flight details, checked the school website whenever you had internet access with a mix of wistfulness and dread on your face, you visited the Duke often for supplies you "might need, just in case" -- plenty of things that might have set off the alarm that you weren't doing so hot mentally.

The Lady was feeling similarly, though she wasn't sure if it was because your energy had rubbed off on her or that these thoughts had always been there but they were coming to light now that the inevitable was going to happen.

She was as excited as you were when you got your letter of acceptance, and even threw a little celebration for you with her daughters. She knew how hard you had been working toward this goal, and to see things finally unfold after months of anticipation and anxiety made it all worth it.

She was already aware that you had to move away from them for a while, she had accepted this. Or at least, she thought she had. Because as much as she trusted that you would do well for yourself there, wherever you may end up, she was still worried.

Mostly for your safety and well-being, but also (rather selfishly) for herself. She couldn't be with you while you went through with this new chapter in your life, and for some reason that didn't sit right with her.

At first, she did try to talk to you and convince you to go somewhere a little closer to home. She wanted to be able to visit you and check up on you instantly. She was going to miss you, and she didn't want to miss out too much on this part of your life.

She had the comnections anyway, she could pull strings to get you anywhere you wanted within the area. But you were put off by it -- you worked hard to get to where you wanted to go, not only would it feel like a waste to put it off but also disingenious to take up her offer of networking to get somewhere where others had to work for too.

Surely Alcina, a woman of her own making, could understand that, right?

If you're adamant and insist on going to your choice of college, then she might relent. She'll be petty about it for a few weeks but she will eventually accept that this was your wish.

But seeing you now, barely able to sleep weeks before your trip to the new area and campus, it didn't help quell her fears.

Part of her thinks this will pass; after all, if you were stubborn enough to stick to your guns about going to your college of choice, then she should trust your judgement... right?

She watches you in silence for a few days, seeing how you deal with this new stressor. She listens when you start to rant lightheartedly about how many classes you're going to have to take, which electives you want to take up, how big the school is and how you hope you won't get lost.

She also offers a comforting gesture every now and then when you start to ramble, perhaps a hand to cup your cheek or one placed on your knee, just to ground you. And it helps. Sometimes.

Three nights before you were going to leave, you found yourself staring at your acceptance letter and registration details, when you were already supposed to be asleep. It was nearly three in the morning, but your mind was more awake than ever.

It brought forth all your insecurities and fears about going to some place new -- what if you don't make friends? What if you flunk out on your first year? What if this letter wasn't even meant for you and it was all a mistake and your planning would have been all for nothing once you got there? Why did you even bother?

All of them came crashing down on you and finally... you sob. You crumple the letter in your hands and cry into it, soaking the paper with snot and tears. The voice in your head telling you you shouldn't go was ringing louder than ever before. This was a mistake, this was a mista--

Alcina placed a gentle hand on your back, crouching next to you on the chair you sat on. You feebly rubbed at your tear-stained cheeks and inhaled loudly, your vision slightly blurred as you tried to stop the corners of your lips from pulling down any further.

"Darling, come to bed. Let's talk." Her tone didn't leave much room for argument, but you were also too tired to anyway. Feeling like a child, you let her take your hand to make the short trip to your shared chambers.

Once you got in, you barely had to be prompted before you started voicing out what had been tormenting you the past days -- or at least ypu tried to. Apparently, all Alcina understood in between your sobs and sniffles was "shouldn't go", "mistake", and "lost". It was enough to confirm her suspicions of your second thoughts.

If this had happened weeks ago, she would have taken the chance to convince you again of going somewhere nearby instead. But she hated seeing you like this, not after you spent so long fighting for what you wanted.

She knew you still wanted to go, it wasn't like you to back out so last minute when it was already within your reach. She made sure to tell you this once you had calmed down enough so you would understand her. The stress was getting to you and it was doing a terrible number on your mental health.

All the while, she kept physical contact with you. Suddenly being so small wasn't so bad with your hand completely enveloped by hers.

You took deep breaths, eyes puffy and red, drowsy and barely able to think anymore. You think you got what Alcina was trying to say, but you didn't have it in you to process it all yet.

She quietly settled beside you and wrapped an arm around you, pulling you close as you drifted off.

The morning after, you two talked about it again over breakfast in her private study. Her daughters were a bit confused as to why you two didn't join them but Alcina only explained it was a private matter.

She reiterated what she said last night, about your hard work and the mental toll of the new burdens you may have to face. You talk, she listens, and vice versa. It feels very... productive somehow, despite the fatigue from last night still being fresh in your mind.

She mentioned that she was always there for you. You knew that. Sometimes it was hard for you to believe (through no fault of her own) bit hearing it from her helped alleviate that, even for just a moment.

You spent the rest of the day not doing anything related to your departure at Alcina's behest. She saw you were extremely meticulous in the week leading up to it so she was sure you were more than prepared. You needed to relax and let your mind think of something else, lest you implode. Wouldn't want our future college student burning out before the semester even starts, right?

The day you were going to leave, Alcina and the girls unfortunately couldn't leave the village. However, they still bade you goodbye and gave some parting gifts. Daniela was sure to remind you of your promise to return during the holidays, especially since they may not be able to reach you.

You turned to your lover, a small smile on your face as you thanked her for everything. The talk from a few days ago helped. It didn't completely ease your worries, but it was enough to calm you and help you think clearly again. You thanked her for reminding you of your ambitions and dreams.

"You built those dreams all on your own, who would I be if I didn't support the person I love on their pursuits? Even in times you don't believe in yourself, just know that I do. I believe in you always, my love."

Alcina was quite teary-eyed herself, giving you one more tight hug and a kiss to remember her by. It was only going to be a few months, but still a few months too long.

But it was comforting to know you had a family back home waiting for you.

[youwontlikethisblog]

The After Math Of Their First Time.

Now in the after math we have an even more confused Armando. While Betty has had yet another dream of hers become a reality.

As I mentioned in my previous post regarding this night(Forgive Me Post) when Armando goes to drop off Betty he brings up the fact that it wasn't Betty's first time(he wasn't her first) he asks her: Beatriz , who were you with before[me]? when she stays silent and worries her mouth Armando's demeanor changes.

"There was another man in your life, right?" She stopped making eye contact with him before he asked this question and nods while swallowing hard, briefly makes eye contact and tells him:

"Yes Sir. There was someone. I had a relationship before[you]."

"Nicolas Mora?" Armando says not missing a beat nor a second. His lips sit in a tight line while he examines Betty.

"No." She says in a low voice, swallows hard and shakes her head. Since her behavior and mannerisms all go in hand with what she's saying; Armando who is a man who is good at manipulating people based on body language(not as good as Mario though) believes her. He stops staring at her, turns to look in front of him and looks to take a breath of relief. "It was somebody else but I don't like talking about that." He turns to stare at her.

"No, I don't want to make you uncomfortable either." He seems more relaxed here than he did seconds ago "Let's not talk about it anymore."

I briefly touched on the subject in the last post that Armando was jealous in this scene, however, what type of jealousy? I would like to expand on this here.

(If you haven't yet; read post Nicolas Mora Is Better Than You before you continue reading this post.)

Jealousy is a bunch of feelings summed into one: Insecurity, inadequacy, resentment, hopelessness, and/or disgust.

While Armando does feel possessive of Betty as an object, harbors feelings of animosity against Nicolas he also is jealous of not only Betty(and her "relationship" w Nic) but Nicolas. He is extremely jealous of him and not only because he is a threat in an economic level or even a romantic level but because he is a threat in all aspects.

To really understand this lets ignore what I said in the previous post about how Armando isn't the one that is actively in Betty's personal life and how he only gets glimpse of it or how Don Hermes approves of Nicolas.

Lets completely ignore that Nicolas is in Terra Moda, Betty is the owner of Eco Moda and working for Armando.

Let's pretend that Betty and Armando met one day and they established a friendship of sorts. Maybe they shopped at the same grocery store, maybe Armando and her interacted when she worked at the banks(bc she never got fired) and from there formed a friendship of sorts.

Though things were always impersonal, Betty had a small crush on Armando who went to the bank on a regular biases where they talked about money blah blah blah and Armando slowly started to wonder about Betty and her personal life and one day Armando finds out Betty has a boyfriend.

He finds out when he goes to the bank by overhearing Betty talking with a work friend about it(in this scenario we'll also be forgetting that he is extremely obsessed with perfection) and he asks her about it once their meeting is over and she tells him she doesn't have one but he ponders about this on his own and becomes paranoid about his feelings and investigates who Nicolas is by asking said work friend of Betty's about Nicolas.

He finds out Nicolas is a man desired my many women, who is relatively economically comfortable, is extremely smart and that Betty's dad, who hates everyone, approves of him and that they see each other mostly every single day and that he's always around and that she's stupidly in love with him and that Nicolas, even though he's a good looking man and who has women fawning and crazy about him is also interested in Betty so he isn't a superficial man and cares about the substance of people which means Betty is really exquisite, but that they aren't actually dating because he hasn't made a move on Betty(I combined what Mario, Bertha, and Mariana said).

What Armando knows of his feelings is that he looks forward to seeing Betty when he goes to the bank because she's always so kind and accommodating to him and communicative as well and that she's always personally helping him so they are constantly communicating and he looks forward to it. He knows that Betty is a smart woman and that she also has really wonderful qualities that he likes and because she's also so unconditional with him he thought maybe Betty liked him, that it made sense she'd be like that towards him and that it made him feel special but now he finds out that somebody else has Betty's heart.

So he decides to ask her out and they embark into this affair of sorts(We're also ignoring the sinister plan). However while he is still curious and wondering about how Betty's personal life is and how her inner world is, Betty hasn't welcomed him into it yet. Better yet Betty keeps him at arms length and though he has been somewhat honest and invited her into his personal life he still stands on the outside meanwhile Nicolas remains on the inside and he isn't leaving any time soon.

Armando begins to resent that Betty isn't letting him in while he has let her in, he begins to resent Nicolas for taking Betty away from him one way or another. He feels that he isn't as important or as special as he thought he was and this makes him insecure as a person. He begins to feel inadequate, for the first time in his life, in the romantic front.

So this night after Betty and him have finally taken their relationship to the next step he angrily asks her if Nicolas was her first.

Why do I bring this make believe up?

We're so clouded by the past actions and who Armando is in the core of it all and his complexities that I'm neglecting this important fact. Armando doesn't just view Nicolas as competition, he feels inadequate next to Nicolas and as he told Betty, he imagined and thought he'd be her first(it most likely is also that he thought no man would have slept with Betty up until he did).

It's why he repeatedly told Mario that he couldn't do that to her. He wasn't talking about not being able to physically make himself have sex with her because she's "ugly". He was talking about the morality of it. That he couldn't take something so valuable from Betty with deception, that he couldn't be the man that she gave her first experience to when he didn't love her because he knew how it would impact her, how it would hurt her when he ended the relationship and he couldn't bring himself to do that to her(however like I already pointed out, while Betty was being vulnerable Armando began to fall in love and that's what made him want to sleep with her).

So when they finally do sleep together Armando is disappointed that he isn't her first time and when he asks her about it and she confirms it, he now fears that Nicolas was her first time. He fears that Betty gave herself, her first experience to him because it means that Nicolas managed to figure his feelings out before him, that Nicolas was better than him both morally and as a man.

He wants to be part of Betty's personal life. He desires to be in her inner circle. We see this when he hears Don Hermes express himself about Nicolas. When he knows that Nicolas has dinner with her family, that he spends time inside her house. He knows what Don Hermes thinks of him[Armando] because he heard him say he'd fight him the night he hid behind their couch(Brutas! La Policía! post). It isn't just that Nicolas could be better than him now, it's Nicolas could be the one to possess something so intimate of Betty's now.

So when Betty explains that Nicolas wasn't her first time all of a sudden the resentment leaves him and he agrees to not talk about it. However Betty's behavior leaves him a lot more curious. Now this confession of Betty's leaves him picado. I imagine that he probably ponders about her first time wonders why she was so off by it, why she doesn't like talking about it. He wonders about the relationship she had before him and who that man was and how it ended. He probably wonders if Nicolas knows about it and again how Nicolas manages to hold something he desperately wants: her trust.

He respects her desire to not want to speak about it and they say goodnight.

I already talked about the argument Marcela and Armando have when he gets to the apartment in the last post but since that post was so rushed and I was like twelve hours in writing that post I just half-baked it so I'll try to briefly, but in-depth, break it down.

As Armando enters his apartment, like a guilt-free man, he plays with his dog(I'mma call this lost soldier GBNF (Gone But Not Forgotten)) and pets him, we hear Betty's monologue.

I've touched on this in previous post, specifically the Tonight A Dream Of Mine Has Come True, the way that scene and this scene are presented is to show us that what we hear Betty saying is what Armando is thinking, I explained it in detail in that post so if you haven't read it, I recommend you do :)

While Betty says "He told me that he loved me but he also proved it to me with actions." we see Armando pondering over this as he stops interacting with GBNF probably telling himself 'I told her I loved her and this time seggs was different, I was different... could I love her? Nah it's probably not that.' except that instead of being able to go into his room to mediate on the night and its events he finds Marcela on his bed.

[I talked about the parallels in my rant post and the Forgive Me post]

While Marcela is mad and Armando is pretending to care that she is and trying to defend himself he behaves towards her very differently here. The day Betty tried a new look Armando told Mario that the only thing that keeps him with Marcela, at least the only good thing about their relationship, was the seggs and that he was satisfied with it, it's why he always gave into her manipulation because even if he wasn't in the mood, even if he told her no, even when he did so out of guilt and responsibility he still got off and at least that was worth it(that's like actually really sad. He needs a therapist for another reason now, bb get you some support and help). As we know this time he plain out rejects her and doesn't allow for her to manipulate him and when she tries to he turns her down.

Marcela throws it in his face that she had been calling him but he hadn't answered the phone since they last spoke and Armando goes on to angrily explain that next time they won't agree to speak until the next day and that he'll constantly call her and report himself so she can control him like a little kid, that every five minutes he can remind her who he is and he looks so pissed and done, like emotionally just frustrated with this argument.

Yes we know Marcela has a reason to not trust him but she feeds the cycle of her own as well. It would be so easy for her to remove herself from the situation/relationship but the problem here isn't that Armando cheats and gaslights her, the problem here is that Marcela doesn't want to let go of him. She feels entitled to him and because of this entitlement she completes the circle of hell. Again I'm not saying that Armando is innocent, he's not, he's a cheating scumbag, but she knew this before they got engaged, like she knew what she was getting herself into and she still wanted in and when they got engaged she felt entitled to all of him(I talk about this in like mostly every post, for once I'd like to write something good about her lol).

Marcela then stops arguing, you can tell she feels guilty for it and reaches out to him, placing her hands on his shoulders but he moves and pulls her hands from him and steps away from her and lays on his bed while Marcela gets on her knees, beside his bed and explains that she was only worried about him, that she thought something bad had happened to him.

Unlike with Betty, who asked him if he felt ill because of the drinks, who had her arms around him(though sometimes he looked like he wanted to take them off of him) when she asked him this and he said he was fine or maybe the drinks were affecting him, Betty told him she'd make him feel better, he asked her how, she said with her kisses and bam consenting make-out town.

The parallel of this is Marcela expressing "worry" about Armando, who tells her he's fine.

"I just want to go to the bathroom wash up, get in my pijamas, and go to bed."

"No, I can't wait that long." She says and starts to kiss him and undress him but he tells her:

"Marcela, Please." he pleas.

"It doesn't matter , you're fine as you are, please." She begs him in a I guess seductive way?

However Armando has barely touched her, when she neared him he kept his hands up in the air, only has one hand on her back as if trying to pull her from him. He then stares at her, with a cold stare of rejection(I think he's thinking to himself 'did she not hear me? I said no. I said no!') and Marcela reacts offended.

"What's your problem? Do you not want to be with me? Do you want me to leave?" She asks with an angry tone and arms folded in front of her. Armando now stares at her with fear.

Which is different from when Betty asked him if he wanted to no longer be with her and go to Marcela's apartment. When she asked him if he was feeling bad, and if he wanted to drop her off home. Armando explained to her it wasn't that but it was just getting late, however at the club he not only accepted her advances but he also encouraged them(Forgive Me Post). Not only that when Armando rejected her advance inside the hotel room, Betty respected his no.

"I'm tired." He says after trying to find an excuse. His tone of voice shows fear as he talks as if he were out of breath and though he has told her this excuse before, he hadn't given her this stare of determination. He wasn't even going to give her wiggle room and when she notices this she stands up and tells him that that had never stopped him before(yeah cause you manipulated him and pushed his boundaries).

Armando doesn't allow her questioning of his manhood to keep him from staying faithful to Betty. Instead, unlike before when he just basically gave up and let Marcela convince him otherwise, he tells her that tonight it would be an impediment for him but this whole time he looks fearful and nervous.

Now the next day Betty arrived to Eco Moda with contentment and excited to see Armando(dude Wilson is always so sweet to Betty(lets ignore the first couple of ep)).

Betty saw Marcela and Armando arriving together, which we know what that implies to Betty.

So once inside of Eco Moda, after Armando told her they needed to talk, as Betty is going towards their office she sees the personification of her guilty conscious in the shape of Marcela.

What Marcela is saying to her is what Betty is telling herself, while she also tries to justify what they did. When Marcela says that last night when he was done with her she went and made love to her[Marcela] and that it could be that he is playing Betty or her but maybe them both but that she[Marcela] is the one that Armando is going to end up with.

This speaks on Betty's fears.

When she enters their office Armando is waiting for her. He starts off explaining that he knew he had told her that he'd go to his apartment and spent the night by himself but Betty interrupts him by saying: "Nonono Sir. I told you I respect that relationship, I get it." (She sure do have a funny way of showing "respect" for that relationship.

Armando then goes on to clarify that nothing happened, basically that he was truthfully only with her and that he stayed faithful to her.

But Betty tells him that he doesn't need to explain things. Armando then begs her to allow him to explain things to her. Why does he beg her?

In a past post I explained how to Armando it was so important to be able to trust Betty and to know that she didn't lie to him(Betty, My Betty! Part 2.5 post.) but ever since the night that he fought Roman and Co. things have begun to change. Armando has become a bit more attentive and in tune with Betty's needs, desires, and feelings and after last night, it is more evident here that he needs her to know that he was impecable, that he didn't lie to her or hurt her. He needed her to know that he was truthfully only with her and that he wouldn't touch Marcela or another woman after being with her because she was special to him and their first time meant a lot to him as well. He needs her trust him and believe in him.

So he begins to explain things to her, being honest and albeit dramatic(he always is when he's retelling events).

Now for the last scene of this post lets make a deep dive to Mario and Armando's conversation/ Aura Maria and Betty's conversation.

I won't really breakdown the dialogue here, instead I'll breakdown the tone and behavior from Armando and Mario.

After Mario begs him to tell him about the night Armando calls him a vieja chismosa (A woman who likes gossip) and they go off to the meeting room.

A reluctant Armando tells him he did sleep with Betty. He is stiff the entire time as he talks to Mario, showing that he is uncomfortable sharing this with him and that he doesn't, on a very different level, want to share the intimacy he shared with Betty, but he'll only share a bit of it to get him off his back and to also be able to process what happened and how he feels about it.

As Mario says that he can imagine the concentration and imagination that Armando had to have had to be able to sleep with Betty, Armando, sitting still holding his hands(showing he is trying to comfort himself or is angry, looking at the context clues the serious expression, his tone of voice and how he seems to be refraining himself it is anger what he is feeling.) grits his teeth and clenches his jaw.

He isn't only uncomfortable talking to Mario about this but he is angry at him for what he is saying and insinuating. He tries to end the conversation when Mario jokes, telling him that he answered his question, however Mario asks him how it affected him and Armando tries to explain why it affected him to begin with.

In short words Armando tells him that Betty isn't just another woman he slept(one of his models or occasional friend) with but that she is an important woman to him and because of that reason last night was important to him.

"I made love with a woman who is in love, who is truthfully in love." He says this with a tender tone, something that holds importance to him, that makes him happy, that sweetens his life. In other words something that makes him soft but also the realization of Betty's love for him and how true it is. "This doesn't welcome any jokes." He says and angrily tells Mario "So don't expect for me to act like nothing happened. Of course it affects me, my skin isn't made of iron." In another post(Tonight A Dream Of Mine Has Come True and La Arrogancia De La Niña) I explained how Armando doesn't feel comfortable when the subject revolves around Betty as a person so when Mario makes jokes and Armando tries to defend why he feels the way he does and explain himself, as well as try to understand how he feels he stops being so reluctant in the conversation but as soon as Mario starts making jokes again he stops, gets angry and shuts off.

"Okay, one second, you're telling me that you're feeling something for Betty?" Armando looks at him with furrowed eyebrows and concerned eyes and he swallows hard. One could simply assume that he is confused or even simply worried but it goes more than that. This is the exact same expression he had when Marcela was reading that poem(Don't Yell At Her! Don't You Yell At Her! post) he is anguished to tell this to Mario, to be that vulnerable with him but also, that he is worried that he has feelings for her and the implications of said feelings.

Lets rewind a few steps and look at the journey of Armando's feelings so far.

1: He begins to take notice of Betty as a loyal employee

2: He begins to blur the lines of impersonal to personal.

3: He starts to change towards the way he treats her as her boss because he cares about how Betty feels working for him(Which he didn't care about that with the rest).

4: he makes her his confidant in all aspects of his life.

5: he entrust her with his entire livelihood(trust her like no other)

6: he begins to get curious about her personal life.

7: he is forced to face the reality of why he is so "special" to her. AKA the revelation that Betty "has" a boyfriend.

8: He drunkenly confesses his feelings to Betty.

9: he soberly confesses his feelings to Betty.

10: he lives under denial of said feelings but his subconscious is stronger than he is.

11: each night he spends with Betty his emotional attraction grows until it becomes physical attraction(Which he denies).

12: He has had to learn to notice and place Betty's needs, desires, and feelings before his own and enjoys doing so.

13: he is forced to once again face his feelings of attraction towards Betty the night before.

So again, Armando does what he does best, deny.

Due to his obsession with perfection, need to control everything, and his own personal conversations that he has within himself(Why couldn't we get those? I gotta be connecting the dots here a lot) this new revelation is a hard one to swallow. Armando has never been in love and he always thought he'd fall in love with a woman that looks like Marcela, Adriana Arboleda, etc. However now it is possible that he's in love, for the first time ever or at least beginning to fall in love, with Betty, the "ugly" assistant he has, who he knows his best friend would crucify if he found out about his true feelings so Armando, pained by this, denies it and it does pain him to deny these feelings from himself which is why we get this reaction.

To throw Mario off his scent he tells him he feels remorse, and that's it(Have y'all seen that John Mulaney special where he says that when he was a kid this police officer told him to throw his wallet across the street to make robbers run the other direction to throw them off his scent so he could escape? Basically same here).

Next Aura Maria and Betty start to talk. Betty expresses her happiness and how she would have never imagined that it would be like that(she really sticking to her five star review on yelp).

In the room over Armando is telling Mario the retelling of the events the previous night. He tells him that he wasn't capable of physically having sex with Betty when she came out of the bathroom and that of course, she picked up on it and told him she understood, that she knew no man could desire her.

So did Armando sleep with Betty out of pity? Out of compassion?

When we look at the context of previous scenes the short answer is no.

The long answer is this so sit tight. That night Armando did something he'd never done before, be intimate with a woman. Betty was extremely vulnerable with him this night. She gave more of herself to him than in the physical sense. She let him in, she welcomed him into her inner dilema and fears. She moved him, deeply moved him. She gave him something he desired more than sex. She gave him her intimacy.

When he is retelling what happened, especially when it gets to the physicality, he looks up, as if reliving the moment visually in his memory. His expression is of peace and joy. He is not disgusted with the mental image he has, in fact he is pleased with it.

Mario is staring at him the entire time with eyebrows raised, wide eyes and a slight frown. Since Armando isn't staring at him(he's savoring his memory) he doesn't notice this but as soon as he stares at him Mario stops and convers his mouth. He then congratulates him and tells him that so far things sounded like they went well and he asks for more.

In the post Tonight A Dream Of Mine Has Come True I explained the comfort Mario has at asking these sorts of questions implying that both Mario and Armando don't hold back in being explicit when they talk about their conquests and one night stands so here he expects nothing less. He expects for Armando to tell him everything about Betty and what they did. He expects a word for word replay of the night but like the times before when it comes to subjects such as these, Armando shuts it down(finally a gentleman).

Mario pesters, asking who he used as a mental image, who he imagined instead of Betty.

"No inspiration used. Last night I made love to Beatriz Pinzon Solano." Armando says starting at Mario, who looks away from him, closes his eyes and convers his mouth. Armando looks down at his hand , which he's been fidgeting with, with a frown on his lips.

Armando is lying to Mario, not about who he slept with the previous night, but about his feelings and it upsets him that he can't talk this through or talk to his best friend about his feelings because he knows that Mario will just make fun of him for it. This is where we begin to see this change in Armando take shape, while before it was blurry and almost unnoticeable now it is becoming focused and recognizable.

Armando does want to talk about his feelings and he does want to understand them to some degree. Almost like there's this yearning and screaming inside of him to understand what he feels for Betty, especially after the confession he made to Betty and not only how he felt about the whole experience but because he knows, he freaking knows he treated Betty differently than any other woman before her and the fact that he didn't even desire nor want to be touched by Marcela as well disturbes him but he has no safe space or place to be able to talk about said feelings so the best thing he can do is run away from them but unlike before, this upsets him.

It's like denying himself from something he needs.

When Mario once more tries to pry any details of Betty's body Armando gets upset and tells him he doesn't understand how he managed to do that, that it was just something that came out of nowhere. Mario then asks if what is disturbing him is that fact or what it could be he feels something, but Armando tells him that he just feels guilty for it all and his conscious is killing him.

While yes this is true, he doesn't like deceiving Betty, deep down he is actually aware now that he does care for Betty and that he was both emotionally and physically satisfied with Betty. Armando is actually welcoming the understanding of his feelings while before he lived in denial of them and avoiding them, now he wants to understand them but he knows he can't do that with his best friend so he once more, like before, shuts down and gets mad at Mario.

While Betty tells Aura Maria that her boyfriend told her he loved her for the first time, Aura Maria tells her that saying it and proving it are two different things but an overjoyed Betty tells her that he not only told her he loved her but that showed it to her because he was really special and she had never imagined it would have been like that.

Both The Pervert and Aura ask the same question "Tell me how was it?"

Mario throws out synonymous for the words "hot seggs" he is wanting to know what woman was under those clothes that made him feel the way he did, Mario is strictly physical and that's it and while Armando to some point was the same, he knew that Armando also desired a stable and good relationship and to fall in love, as Armando himself told him that.

So Armando tells him she was none of that and that seggs with her was none of that.

"So then?"

"It was like..." He stops to think, looking for the right word when he finds it he smiles, again as if remembering it fondly, "sweet."

"What?" Mario murmurs. "Sweet?" he says in a disbelief tone and low voice. "A-Armando look me in the eyes." Armando does so. "It was really sweet?"

Armando pulls away from the wall he had been leaning and shifts to face him, leaning against said wall again, and after taking a deep breath begins to explain.

"Calderon, that woman is in love with me. What? did you expect for it to not be? It had to be sweet, so yes, sweet." He says explaining. His eyes brows are middle raised, slightly squinting his eyes but his features are soft, he leans against the wall while with one hand he moves in the air to explain things with the other he has it in his pocket. This indicates, roughly, an anxious attitude as well as not wanting to talk more about the subject and that he's upset to continue talking about it.

"I get that she's in love with you but were you really sweet to her too?" Armando, who turned away from him is once more leaning hard against the blinds of the window, arms folded in front of him and eyebrows middle lowers, indicating frustration.

"He was really sweet, Aura Maria. I didn't expect him to be like that. That's why I'm saying that I think he really does love me." She smiles. Aura Maria celebrates with her.

"Okayokay. So it was really sweet for the both of you." Mario raises his arms up in a "I'm innocent." manor.

"Mhm"

"Armando, you're worrying me." He places his hands inside his pockets. Armando is staring elsewhere, worrying his bottom lip with eyebrows middle lowered(almost close together) since he looks somewhat zoned out we can assume that he is in deep thought. "What happened. Talk to me." Armando turns to look at him and defeated lets out a sigh, closes his eyes and goes to sit down and starts to talk.

"I don't know, I have to clear myself. I'm going to try and be as clear as possible with you. Lets see, I-no-best said lets separate two things. One thing is that is ugly, right?(he confused about it now? I'm just joking)." Mario agrees. "And another thing would be that I hate Betty, I don't hate Betty." This time his eyebrows are pulled closer together with really squinted eyes. He is really evaluating his feelings here and making the effort to understand them. "All the contrary, I have an immense endearment for her. She is a very important woman in my life."

(ENGLISH GET A WORD EQUIVALENT TO QUIERO/QUIERE!)

"You cherish her?"(it's the best word I could find to translate this, English is so tragic tbh.)

"Of course." Armando admits, he has a look of relief washed away with panic and now he begins to deny, freaked out by his own emotions he tries to justify his feelings for something they're not. "Of course I cherish her. I cherish her-" he places a finger on his philtrum: anxiousness and hesitant to speak. "like you cherish Sara, your secretary. Yes like my dad cherish Susana his secretary. I-I think that one in life...cherishes a lot of people and the relationship that Betty and I have established is a relationship of..." He starts to fidget with his fingers worrying his bottom lip and staring off at something on the table. "of friends." he stares at Mario and with his hand, open, explains to him. "We're friends and we cherish each other a lot. Man, I start to think and Betty is a person who has always been unconditional with me, who has always been there when I've needed her. She's a person who has saved my life, who risks her life for me every day she's a person( I don't want to use the word love but English you suck so I gotta) I love a lot(he means platonically)" Mario stares at him with raised eyebrows, wide eyes and a frown. "Tell me, why wouldn't I feel that for her? Why shouldn't I feel endearment for her?"

"No, no of course. Why not?" Mario reacts slow. He is trying to "Respect" Armando's feelings even though he wants to make fun of him for it but he knows if he does that Armando will stop talking about how he feels, therefore, stop giving him intel. "Why not? It's just this is the first time I hear you say you love her."

"Because I wasn't aware of this until now!" Armando says frustrated. "Until now that I'm faci...facing Betty." He slightly furrows his brows and stares elsewhere with a shocked expression of revelation. He takes in a deep breath and places a finger in front of his lips, thinking this through. "Calderon, cherishing Betty isn't a crime, bro." Notice his tone of voice as he confesses this final part is full of emotion. This fear that he had been carrying within himself for days, weeks or even months, that he cared about Betty deeply cares but was afraid to admit this to himself much less out loud until now, he finally admits it, he finally says it out loud because he is in a desperate need to understand how he feels about her and he accepts it. He accepts that this is how he feels and that it isn't wrong for him to feel like this because she deserves it.

Armando then goes on to say that what they are doing to her is a crime. To do that to his partner in crime, who loves him and dreams of him twenty four seven and that is what is killing him.

"It should be killing you if you did it with repulsiveness but no, you did so, sweetly. Sweetie pie." he sings at the end. Armando now looks at him in disbelief and anger.

"Then how would I have done it? She's in love, how was I going to do it then?"

Mario is now out of his element, unlike in previous scenes, this time Mario is not in control of Armando so he reacts irrationally.

"Yes but you've slept with Marcela who is in love with you and so far from what I understand the hook-ups aren't so sweet." he smiles, thinking he's found footing in the situation and a way to gain control of it.

"Ah don't talk to me about Marcela now." He stands up, annoyed. "Lets not talk about that woman. Let's change topic, yeah? Last night." He slaps the chair. "When I got to my apartment she was waiting for me." He says so annoyed, again.

"No?" Mario asks "surprised".

Skip the scene with Marcela and Patsy Pats; Betty and Aura Maria are still talking in her office.

Aura Maria is telling her that now that they've slept together that she can't stop doing it and blah blah blah I'm only mentioning it because it's funny when Armando walks into the conversation and now it's him he gets a taste of jealousy like Betty did that morning when she saw Armando and Marcela getting out of his car.

The fact Armando believes this is really about Nicolas is funny but also believable. For one, as I pointed out, Armando feels insecure when it comes to Betty and Nicolas, especially now after they've sinned, fornicated if you will, no wait adulatory because he's "committed" to Marcela. Two because he knows that Nicolas spends time with Betty at her house so when Aura Maria tells her to take advantage of the moments her parents aren't looking or when he goes to the bathroom to sneak in there with him and y'know, sha-bang.

Armando rubs his hand with his thumb, indicating anxiety, however he tries to keep his composure and if y'all haven't notice Armando now isn't speaking so harshly to Betty. He is keeping the same tone he has with her whenever he is being vulnerable. As Armando leaves Betty's office after telling her that he needed some paper work, he shuts the door hard, expressing his anger as well.

Once Aura leaves and Betty goes into Armando's office, Armando throws his jealousy fit, but unlike before when he'd yell at her and question her dedication, her loyalty, her love, this time he tells her that she can do what she wants, that Nicolas belonged to her personal and intimate life(again, showing resentment for that), when Betty tries to explain what happened Armando tries to cut her off, eventually she does though. This is similar to earlier that morning.

We then see the power dynamic here, once more Armando is the one that holds the cards and Betty is supposed to do what he says, which isn't a partnership.

[THE LETTER! WHAT WAS IN THE STUPID LETTER BETTY!]

I think those the next scenes[next few episodes] are pretty self-explanatory. Armando completely forgets about the picture he has of AA in his pocket and he makes out with Betty and Betty accepts to not break up while Armando that once the big meeting is over that he'll break up with Marcela and they'll become official, now he has to learn to accept the idea that he has to learn to accept as an idea(So confusing, I know lol) of a potential future where he is open about his relationship with Betty.

The next post I'll write is one I'm really looking forward to; AA shows up to Eco Moda and my all time favorite scene that brings and ties together this theory that Armando has thought about, for a long time, about his feelings for Betty and what it means to him, AKA the night of the museum.

'Til then :)

[r0zez-in-bl00m]

~ 𝓒𝓻𝓾𝓮𝓵 𝓽𝓸 𝓫𝓮 𝓴𝓲𝓷𝓭 ~

Chaotic parents

🦇Lilia Vanrouge x fem!reader, WORD COUNT : : 2K

Description- Lilia's wife comes for a visit but leaves a trail of destruction behind.

Placed under the cut for length!

It was yet another quiet day at the dormitory founded on the elegance of the fairy of thorns. The morning was greeted by Sebek and Silver’s bickering about whose training routine was better while Silver occasionally dozed off leaving Sebek to jerk him awake every single time with his thunderous voice. The dorm leader of Diasomania, Malleus, stared out of the window in the common room, finding the outside world much more interesting than the leather stiff book he had read a countless number of times or the ongoing talk across the room.

Yes, it was indeed another normal, boring day for the residents of Diasomania. Well, far too normal.

The one-sided quarrel between Sebek and Silver ended abruptly when the sound of an explosion came from the kitchens (did they even have that?), breaking the second-year’s slumber instantly as he looked around quizzically. “WHAT WAS THAT?!?!” Sebek thundered, the obvious surprise plastered on his face as he faced Silver. The second-year shrugged his shoulders as a response as he removed Sebek’s hand on his dorm uniform. “Maybe the old man is in the kitchen again,” Silver said, staring at the hallway to the kitchen worryingly.

Silver knew how experimental his father was in the field of culinary arts. The variety of weird, foul-smelling dishes he had tasted (and dreaded) as a little child was a prime example of it. As the knight had feared, not soon after, Lilia stepped into the common room, his clothes a little burnt, face covered in soot, with a burnt dish in his hands. “Oh my, this stew took longer than I had anticipated!” He said as he dried the non-existent sweat off his brow. Sebek retracted the moment the blasted dish’s smell reached his nose. That dish could barely be categorized as food, let alone be eaten under normal circumstances. Was the dressing covered in slime and worms?

“I-I see . . . it’s an excellent looking dish, Lord Lilia!” Sebek complimented, but his reaction betrayed his words greatly. “May I ask which stew is it?”

‘Better not ask if you don’t want to be the first victim Sebek,’ Silver thought but refrained from speaking it out loud. Sebek was always too fond of his seniors. The old fae, on the other hand, seemed giddy and unusually excited to tell Sebek about his extra special dish. “Well, it’s my specialty dish which I only make on the rarest of occasions, and mind you it’s really hard to persuade me to make this dish even if you ask a million times,” Lilia giggled while continuously shoving the otherworldly stew at Poor Sebek’s face.

Who would be in their right mind to actually persuade Lilia Vanrouge, the most horrible cook humanity has ever seen?

Lilia’s body shivered from giggling as Sebek guessed various stew names he had known. In defeat, Lilia finally disclosed the name, “It’s my legendary ‘slimy beef casserole’!!”

Silver almost choked at the name of the dish alone when he thought he was about to doze off again, finding it hard to breathe as he stared at Lilia as if he had grown another head.

Malleus, from his window, had his ears perked up as well at the unusual excitement. “Beef-Tomato stew?” Malleus questioned, “Don’t you usually make it for-”

POOF!

Before he could finish a puff of green smoke encircled the room completely. Silver’s dread turned horrendous as his aurora eyes traveled up to see the person coming out of the clearing green fog.

Those (e/c) eyes, that hair tied in a ponytail, and the familiar scent of raspberries. Hauling the heavy travel bag in her hand, the apparently young-looking girl smiled brightly and exclaimed brightly, “Family reunion!!” tackling Lilia to the ground, eliciting a chuckle from the latter. All the while Silver pinched the bridge of his nose in worry.

Indeed, it was going to be a long day.

----------------------------------------------

“All I had heard that it was a famous school for kids with magic, but I didn’t know that its campus was this big!!!” His mother chirped happily, skirting around here and there like a newborn baby bird. It had taken everything for Silver to not sink and die. To actually think that his own mother would show up at the school where he and his father were studying, and in summer clothes on top of that. That tank top concealed under a modest button-up shirt wasn’t doing her any favor. He had to persuade his stubborn mother to wear something modest enough to not get any weird glances.

Aside from Silver’s anxiety and protectiveness towards his mother, Lilia was extremely ecstatic.

“My sweet, you hadn’t mentioned that you had taken a trip to the southern islands in your recent letters,” Lilia said, strolling side by side with his beloved, arms linked and fingers intertwined. “Judging by your complexion you sure had a great time!”

(Name) giggled, “Of course, unlike you who would turn into a mummy just after an hour under the sun, I am always up for a swim on a hot summer beach and getting a tan!” She rolled up her sleeves and showed her changed skin color with pride, a smirk adorning her adorable visage.

Silver sheepishly scratched his head, “So, what made you come for a visit mom?” It’s not like he wasn’t happy, of course, no child could ever be sad to see their mother after a long time, but the question was- why now?

(Name) shuddered at the question, as if it was something too painful to talk about. Nonetheless, she shared her part of the story. “Staying in the Valley of thorns with nothing to do but tric⸺ I mean, play with neighbors was getting tooooo boring.” She said, twirling around in her summer dress, “That was when Sebek’s mum suggested me to go on a trip like old times! Gosh, I had missed the sights! But, traveling with my sugar daddy was much more fun, and I kind of started to miss⸺”

Silver’s eyes widened like two satellite dishes as he subconsciously cut of his mother, “Sugar what?”

He heard his father laugh heartily, smacking his arm slightly as if it was normal, “I told her to call me that, cool right?” Lilia asked, his lips occasionally curving upwards. Silver didn’t know what to do in this awkward situation. It was getting hard to keep a poker face when his cheeks were getting redder by the goddamn second. Unlike him, Malleus and Sebek were not even a little fazed by this.

“Nowadays people call their partners with such flowery nicknames,” (name) curiously reminiscence the one time she had heard someone calling their lovers in an odd fashion while at the beach. “Uh! Time flies by.”

Lilia chuckled at his beloved’s innocence, “Sweetheart, it’s good and all that you are learning new things and accepting the changing times, but” he gestured to Silver’s tomato face amusingly. “Other students will notice us, look, even our son is getting all embarrassed even after hearing our romantic exchanges a million times.”

Sebek, initially confused about what the great seven was happening, seeing his fellow guard show vulnerability, screamed at full-throttle, “SILVER!! Be ashamed of yourself!! It’s unbecoming of Young Master’s escort to show his blushing face in public!!!!”

Silver held the bridge of his nose for the umpteenth time. “No one hadn’t even noticed until you brought it up for everyone to hear.” He pointed out to the two first-year students who were curiously eyeing the Diasomania group, only to scramble away laughing when Silver had noticed them.

Pushing all the hue and cry away, the prince of thorns conversed with Mrs. Vanrouge, his eyes glimmering with child-like fondness. “How has everything been in the Valley of thorns, (name)? Well, I presume?” His questions were cute just like his expressions!

The female couldn’t help but smile giddily, “My Prince, it hasn’t been long since your last visit to the land. What more could change in a few months’ time?”

The old fae nudged the prince’s arm a little. “You know Malleus, sweet. Always insatiably curious, this young lad,” Lilia added, earning a glare from the dorm leader. Before he could retort and start one of his ‘I’m not a child’ monologues, (name) asked– “Where are Silver and Sebek?” The other two fairies looked behind them and found the two of them vanished from sight.

“They must have stopped because of their argument again, those two.”

“I’ll go look for them if you’d like,” Malleus offered, but the old man shook it off. “Knowing those two, it’s better if I come too, just in case Sebek takes it to arms and marches on to war,” Lilia said. “(name), could you please wait a minute over here?”

As if she was a child who needed parental consent, (name) pouted at the irritating behavior of her husband only to earn a million mandol smile in return. The promise of getting back in less than a minute had triggered a few options in the female’s mind, none of them were in goodwill. Would she actually be Mrs. Vanrouge if not as much of a trickster as her husband?

A devilish smirk appeared as soon as the duo’s backs disappeared from her sight. Cracking the knuckles of her hands, she gazed around the vacant vicinity.

“Sooooooooo, what to do next?”

----------------------------------------------

The half-silent walk towards the rendezvous point was broken when Lilia had opened up his mouth to speak- “It’s good that the two of you didn’t wander off too much, it would’ve been far too much troubling to search the entire school.”

“I DEEPLY APOLOGISE LORD LILIA!!” Sebek pleaded, or more like screamed for mercy, “If Silver hadn’t fallen asleep, we would’ve come back sooner.”

“And we wouldn’t have become lost,” Silver added apologetically. “It’s alright, it was all in goodwill and we found you in time before dinner,” Malleus reassured. Sebek seemed to calm down at his lord’s words but nonetheless continued to rant and reprimand himself for being an incompetent vassal and what not.

But it stopped the moment all of them found (name) to be missing. “Didn’t we leave (name) here?” Malleus asked, confused as to where she could’ve gone. “My little honey drop likes to play hide and seek a lot, surely she mustn’t have gone too far!” Lilia reasoned but internally dreaded inside. Something of a horrible memory was coming back to him but he couldn’t place his finger on it . . . .

“Father,” Silvers said, serious, “We need to find Mom before she gets herself into trouble.”

“Yes, Silver is absolutely correct, or have you forgotten what happened during the Queen’s birthday?” Lilia’s mouth formed an ‘O’ shaped as the realization dawned over him. “Right! How could I forget?” (name) had planted a party bomb inside the cake that it exploded and its contents spilled everywhere. It wasn’t that big of a prank but the look the Queen had thrown afterward spoke volumes.

“In that case, the sooner we find her, the better it will be.” At that, the group again moves out to search, the expectancy to loads of trouble ahead humming in their minds.

On the other side, many weird occurrences happened at NRC that day. Students found the cafeteria benches levitating in the air with Rosehearts screaming ‘OFF WITH YOUR HEAD’ at the anonymous person who had hanged him from the ceiling. The Lion of Savannah was in a sour mood all day after it took him 2 hours to remove all the girlish accessories which had magically adorned his hair and chased Ruggie to have the evidence removed from existence. The ever-charismatic Vil Schoenheit seemed to have wanted to pop a blood vessel in his body after finding that someone had let Heartslaybul’s Flamingos loose in the dormitory. The clean-up in itself was a big task, the aftermath even more terrible.

All the while (Name) treated herself to some roasted marshmallows (courtesy of the cafeteria ghosts who mistook her for a child). The female never quite understood why her husband detested such a delectable snack. At the thought of Lilia, she wondered if he was looking for her while she was creating chaos in the school. She giggled at the illustration of his panicked face came to her mind.

Leaving the train of thoughts, she turned her focus back on chomping down the white snack. “Oh, a child has wandered into the campus?” a suspicious voice came from behind her, a shadow looming over her and blocking the sunlight. (Name) immediately turned to see a man with a bird mask glowering from above. The female wanted to scoff at the impudence of the idiot in front of her. Child? She was even older than the ancestry line of the top hat he was wearing. But, still feeling a little devilish, she decided to go with the flow. The headmaster crouched down in front of her, “Are you lost?”

“KIDNAPPER!!!!!!!!” The scream was so hard that it had rendered his hearing senses, which was a first for him given that he had already heard a different variety of screams. “My, dear child you have a loud voice!” Crowley held his head, still trying to shake off the effect, “and I’m not a kidnapper. I may appear suspicious but I’m a very generous person and the headmaster of this school!”

Even more, fun to trick you then.

“Oh really! Then prove it, Mister Crow!” she said faux excitedly.

Crowley cleared his throat, finding the nickname to be cute, “Alright, Alright! How about some ice cream and a little tour of the school?” The female’s mouth immediately watered at the word ‘ice cream’. She nodded vigorously in approval. Suddenly, she felt glad that she came to visit. Having a delicious treat on top of that a good laugh was like icing on a cake. Maybe she could demand a cake too.

“Headmaster Crowley!! Right on time!”

Oh damn.

She dreaded what was about to come next. The sight of her beloved husband with a teasing smile on his face poured water all over her future plans! Goodbye ice-cream.

“Everything has been upside down today . . . . oh, who’s this?” curse his impeccable question ‘who’s this?’

“This is a child I found roaming the gardens,” Crowley explained. “And by what do you specifically mean by ‘upside down’, Vanrouge?”

“You’re requested in the cafeteria, there you might get what you need, for the time being, I can look over after the child,” The damned fae knew what he was doing and was enjoying every bit of it! He smiled, showing more teeth than required, his magenta orbs glowing, “We will have lots of fun, won’t we little one?” It sent shivers down her spine and marked as the queue that she had overstayed her visit and best be off now.

With a puff of smoke, she vanished into sight, leaving the headmaster confused as the green air cleared. “What just happened Vanrouge?”

Lilia smiled peacefully, exhaling a sigh of relief, and said, “Nothing, absolutely nothing.”

----------------------------------------------

“Father, you’re going to mail the stew?”

“Yes! She came for a visit but forgot her favorite dish. I hope that the Thorn delivery service can handle the stew, the worms bite a lot.”

[yandere-daydreams]

i need sugawara gaslighting the shit out of the reader and supplementing it with some sort of drug. missing homework? forgetting assignments? feels like shit man

I mean… He’s a kindergarten teacher, after the time-skip. I feel like coddling his Darling, or, making it so his Darling /needed/ to be coddled would sort be in his nature. Correct me if I’m wrong, though.

Title: Missing Assignments.

TW: Implied Non-Consensual Drug Use, Slight Non-Consensual Touching, Slight Infantalization, and Demeaning Behavior. 

~

Your hand-writing was getting worse.

It shouldn’t have been such a big deal. Everyone got a little messy from time to time, and it probably didn’t help that lately, you’ve been more prone drifting off than paying attention, zoning out or just stopping in the middle of a thought, interrupting your train of thought and turning smooth, graceful curves into jagged edges and smudged ink, the words just barely legible enough to let you see the sentence was gibberish, in its entirety. All your notes were like that, these days. Ever since the beginning of the school year, it’d been so hard to concentrate, so difficult to do anything but lay your head on your desk and go to sleep, even if your teachers were quickly growing fed-up with your impulsive naps. Normally, you might be able to make it up at home, go over your textbook and borrowed notes until you’d memorized everything you missed in class, but doing that now felt impossible when your bed was only an arm’s length away. It felt impossible when your bed wasn’t. Everything felt impossible all the time, and you were beginning to think it was.

Maybe you were the impossible one, the factor that made everything else useless.

Maybe you were the broken link.

“Everything alright, (Y/n)?”

You jerked up at the sound of someone else’s voice, forcing you out of your stupor as you tore your attention away from the paper laid out in front of you, an essay you were supposed to turn-in last week, but only managed to finish the night before. Your instructor was lenient, thankfully, silently assuming there was some quiet, shameful reason one of her best students was suddenly falling behind, but you’d just been too exhausted to think about doing it any sooner. Too drained. Too incompetent.

Biting down on the edge of your tongue, you forced yourself to face Sugawara, kind, patient Sugawara. He’d never moved, but you’d managed to forget he was there, his calm tranquility allowing him to fade into the background as the two of you sat in Karasuno’s courtyard, perched on the edge of a garden wall. You hadn’t asked, but he’d promised to help you during lunch, even if he seemed more than content to peer over your shoulder as you glared at your composition, judging but never commenting. Never critiquing, not you out loud, at least. “You know I’m not,” You mumbled, your voice so low, you could only hope he wouldn’t hear you. “It’s awful and it’s late. I’d probably be better off asking for another extension, or breaking my hands and praying someone feels bad enough to give me a passing grade.”

“Don’t be so pessimistic,” Sugawara replied, his tone light, unaffected. Sympathetic, but not nearly as involved as someone so committed to their self-imposed role should be. “It can’t be that bad. I’ve seen the way you write, you could take that assignment out in your sleep.”

The praise was nice, and yet, the sentiment rang hollow by the time it reached your ears. Another standard to live up to, another person you knew you’d let down, another friend you’d lose because suddenly, you only had the energy to breathe and sleep and eat, occasionally. Less than you should, despite Sugawara’s efforts to keep you well-fed. “I did write it in my sleep,” You sighed, crossing your arms over your chest. “I’ve barely been able to keep my eyes open. I think I’m getting sick, or dying, or something. I’ve been getting these headaches, for the past few weeks, and I’m just so tired--” You forced yourself to stop, to cut off your rant before it could begin. You didn’t want to complain, not when Sugawara was just trying to be nice. When you continued, you did so sheepishly, attempting to shrug off your frustration with a small smile and an airy laugh. “I guess… I don’t know. At this rate, it might be less embarrassing to drop-out early.”

This was usually the part where Sugawara comforted you. He’d slapped your back, tell you to keep your chin up, and you’d nod and grin and try to do better going forward, or, you’d promise to, and he’d act like he believed you. But, rather than lift your spirits, Sugawara only draped an arm over your shoulders and pulled you into his side, encouraging you to rest your head against him. It felt too intimate, too close, but as soon as you let yourself relax, felt his warmth and allowed your mind drift away from your plummeting academics, your body grew heavy, your eyes beginning to sting as they urged you to rest. You resisted, concentrating on a flower that's fallen onto the pavement instead, only looking away when the blossom got caught under another student’s heel. He hummed, gently, as if the sound alone would be enough to soothe you. For a moment, you wished it was. “That might not be so bad.”

Instantly, you were as awake as you’d ever been, more out of shock than determination. “It might not be… what?”

“It might not be so bad.” His small smile never wavered. If anything, it only grew wider as he glanced towards you, his expression softening into something reassuring. It was the look he gave to his struggling underclassmen, the look he gave to his teammates after a particularly bad play. As his friend, you’d never gotten it. As his equal, you hadn’t, but you guess you couldn’t count yourself as one of those, anymore. “Quitting wouldn’t be the end of the world. There’s always other options, and if you really think you’re going to fail, you shouldn’t waste everyone’s time. Going through that much just to pull out at the last minute would be… depressing. Annoying, even, if you already know you’re not going to graduate.”

You hated the way he said it. So casually, as if it was a fact, something bound to happen rather than an episode of burn-out you could get over, with enough time. As if giving up, dropping out, quitting wouldn’t be that big of a deal. Not if your life was the only one you’d ruin. “I'm not sure,” You managed, just as he was getting impatient. “College was the plan, it’s still the plan. I’m not sure how I’d--”

Sugawara made an awkward, breathless sound, his free hand rising to cover his mouth, and it took you a second too long to realize he was laughing. “You really think you’re going to college? You can barely stay awake on your own, do you think you’ll be able to pass an entrance exam?”

At that, you flinched, shied into yourself just a touch more than you had to. You hated it, you were beginning to hate him for it, but… you couldn’t say you disagreed. “What else can I do?” You asked, using what little strength you had left to grit your teeth. “There aren’t a lot of options for failures, Koshi.”

Now, you knew for a fact that he was grinning, the cruel tilt of his lips biting into your temple as he pushed a hasty, fleeting kiss into your hair. You didn’t try to stop it, didn’t try to get away, and for once, you thought you might’ve been able to. You just didn’t want to try and fail when it was so clear Sugawara already thought so little of you. “I’d take care of you, naturally,” He answered, as if it was the obvious solution. “After I graduate, we’d find an apartment together, and I’d take care of everything. Money, housework, all of it. You’d never have to lift a finger.” He paused, briefly, taking just long enough to half-heartedly pluck your essay off of your lap, scanning over the text as the paper creased between his fingers. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. Not when his gaze shifted back to you, slowly, arrogantly. As if you weren’t worth the time it took to talk to you. “I mean, it’s clear you can’t handle things on your own.”

You opened your mouth, but whatever you were going to say was drowned out by the bell, startling and deafening, even so far from the main building. Your argument was bitten back as you forced yourself to focus on your bag, instead, pulling it between you and Sugawara, desperate for a drink, a snack you’d missed, something to wash the bitter taste his words had left on your tongue, but Sugawara didn’t hesitate to take you by the wrist, thrusting a bottle of water into your hand, never giving you an option to refuse. “Don’t worry, I know how forgetful you can be,” He said, barely even bothering to avoid meeting your eyes.

“You’re just lucky you’ve got someone so thoughtful looking out for you.”

[dreamescapeswriting]

Unfinished Business ~ Part Six

WORD COUNT: 6K

WARNINGS: Mentions of mafia, strong language, murder, blood

PAIRING: Bang Chan X Reader

DESCRIPTION: Part six of nine of my new Bang Chan series. 

You’re taken hostage but one of Seoul’s leading mafia families Bang Chan but he doesn’t take you because he wants to fake a marriage or make you fall for him in 365 days no…He wants to use you for his own personal gain. To take over another family but when you try to escape things take a turn for the worst and you learn Chan isn’t one to be messed with.(Please I suck at describing stuff)

THEMES: TW || Chapter includes mentioned of being touched inappropriately by a stranger, Smut will be included in a later chapter so this is a fic for a mature audience, Chan x Fem!Reader, Self insert

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"Wake up sleepyhead," You groaned, shoving whoever was waking you up away from you, hitting them in the face.

"Five more minutes." A rough tug sat you up and you came face to face with Changbin, who was holding a plate in one hand and you in the other.

"Chan isn't here. Eat and then do whatever it is that you do when he isn't here." You looked down at the food on the plate and decided within seconds that you weren't hungry for whatever that was. It didn't look appetising and you didn't trust Changbin as far as you could throw him.

"Where's Jisung? I thought it was his shift this morning." You mumbled taking the plate and leaving it on the bedside table. Changbin didn't care if you ate it or not, he didn't really care for you at all, so he watched you walk around the bedroom trying to figure out what your plan was.

"Are you planning your escape today?" You stared at him and raised your eyebrow, as if he could think you'd run after what Chan did.

"No, I was thinking of cleaning. You guys are pigs." He lunged at you and you smirked at him, you weren't afraid of him or anyone else in this place. They wouldn't kill you because of how Chan acted around you, they held nothing over you which meant you had some kind of leverage.

"I'm going for a shower and then I'm cleaning the house." You rolled your eyes at him and walked into the ensuite bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind you. It's not as though you could escape through the tiny window and it wasn't like you had anywhere to go. Your ankle was doing better though which was great, one less thing to have to worry about when you did inevitably escape from Chan.

The front door had banged open, you looked up from the floor you were cleaning to see who it was that had made such a loud entrance,

"You have a date tonight." You stared at Felix as he spoke to you, as though you had some kind of idea as to what he was talking about.

"To whom are you referring?" He held up two tickets to a charity ball and you stared at them, black tie and ball gown were expected. There was going to be auctions held to donate money to charity. It was a charity ball that donated to the nursing home you used to work at, they held the party once or twice a year for benefactors to make generous donations.

"Chan's going to that?" You questioned. You'd served there a couple of years ago when you wanted to volunteer and the place was beautiful, it was right in Seoul centre in one of the biggest, most expensive hotels ever. Felix nodded his head,

"Like he does every year. Donates a large sum to them every year as well as auction things off. He donates throughout the year though through anonymous donations." You stared at Felix as he told you what Chan did for them, it surprised you you'd only ever heard of the bad things that Chan did for his money, not with it.

"Stealing from the rich to give to the poor? Sounds too much like Robin hood for me." Felix chuckled and shook his head at you, he could see something was going on inside your head. Like a battle with yourself that you weren't going to admit to losing just yet, he was brilliant at reading people and to him, you were an open book.

"I can't go. I have nothing to wear." You went back to cleaning the dishes you'd collected from all over the house and that's when Felix pulled out a wallet.

"That's why I have money, Jisung and Changbin will be following along with us to make sure you don't try anything." You glanced over at your shoulder, Changbin wasn't looking too happy about going with you on the field trip.

"Why not someone else?" You took the washing up gloves off your hands and walked over to the towels. They all knew about your dislike for Changbin since neither of you was trying to hide it, drying your hands and turning back to Felix.

"No one else is free...It'll be fun. I'll help you find something and then I'll get us all a tie to match your dress." Your version of fun seemed different from Felix's. You'd rather stay at home in your bed all day rather than shopping for the perfect dress and shoes.

"Let's go-"

"Don't I have to change first?" You remembered Chan's surprise when you wanted to go out in the jeans you'd been painting in. But Felix was fine with you coming in the leggings and oversized shirt they'd gotten you, it wasn't like he was trying to show you off to everyone.

"Not that's fine. Let's go, we don't want to be late tonight."

The shopping trip hadn't been a total drag like you'd thought it would be, Changbin managed to pretend to be happy to be there. Jisung and Felix were like the brothers you always wanted except way better than you had imagined them to be. It was so nice to be out of the house and joking around with them so much you'd almost forgotten who they were.

"I feel stupid," You said, as you stared yourself in the mirror. Felix was in your bedroom wearing an all-black suit, along with a red tie to match your dress. Chan wanted you all to match so people would know you were all together at the party, that way no one would mess with you. Chan had only gotten back an hour ago and had spent his entire time back locking his office complaining about something to Minho. You'd heard him shouting from inside of the bathroom when you were getting ready but you couldn't understand a word of it, it was all too muffled through the walls to understand anything. He'd been shouting at Minho about how Namjoon was going to be at the party, he never made appearances at things like that which was both good and bad news.

"Chan's downstairs now, the car is here." You sighed and came out of the bathroom nervously playing with your fingers as you waited for them to see you again. The red silk gown was floor length with a split at the front left side coming up to your mid-thigh.

"Whoa." You stared at Felix and shook your head at him, he was the one that had picked the dress out and saw you try it on.

"You saw it before."

"That was before the hair and makeup, you look...whoa." Your makeup had been done by someone in the mall along with your hair. You shook your head at him again and went over to the mirror to look at yourself. It felt like you were playing dress up as a kid all over again, the dress cost more than anything you would ever be able to afford in this lifetime or the next and it had an A-line flow with a backless detail. It was something you never would have worn before, but were wearing now because you had to look your best for the evening.

"Chan's gonna-"

"Chan's gonna what - oh my god," Seungmin gasped as he walked into the room, he'd come to see what was taking so long but he was shocked by how you looked as well.

"Boys," You scoffed, playfully rolling your eyes and heading down the staircase. You could hear Chan ranting about something to the rest of the boys, doubling their security and watching him all night. He didn't care if they were tired or not, they weren't to have their eyes off the ball for even a moment there was too much at risk.

"Are you even listening? This is more important than all the other times we've been to these things. We have someone important to protect now- Are you even listening to me?" Jisung pointed over his shoulder at you, and Chan turned around to see you standing there with a small shy smile on your face. Chan’s jaw dropped as he stared at you, you looked incredible and he couldn't believe you were standing there so awkwardly. Someone that looked like you should have been walking tall and high with their head held high, and he was going to make sure he could help you do that. He was going to make you confident and feel like the beautiful girl you were. All thoughts about what he was talking to his men about were gone as you came closer to him. He took your hand in his and kissed the top of it, placing it back down at your hip and you felt a flutter in your heart as he stared at you. No one had ever looked at you like that before, it was nerve-wracking but at the same time, it made you feel warm inside, safe and that you weren't alone.

"The car," Changbin said, having no time to waste on this stupid moment Chan seemed to be having with you. They were all on edge for the night and were now protecting you and Chan while you were at the event together.

"Is everything okay?" You asked, as you sat in the back of Chan's car together Jeongin was driving with Seungmin by his side. The car in front of you had Felix and Minho inside and the last car behind you carried Hyunjin, Jisung and Changbin, you were being watched from angles. The same thing, matching cars and number plates in case any of you were followed it would be easy enough to confuse them. He was going to make sure nothing happened to you.

"Everything is fine." He lied, looking out of the window. He didn't feel like he could lie while looking you in the eyes. Right now he was having a hard time keeping his hands to himself, because you weren't his to touch he didn't want to make you uncomfortable by putting his hands on you,

"At the party, I'm going to introduce you as my fiancé...go along with it." You nodded and he slipped off a ring from his pinky finger. Turning to look at you as he slid it onto your ring finger, it was the perfect fit.

"Is there a reason we're faking that I'm your fiancé?" Chan nodded and turned to you trying to make it seem like he wasn't lying through his teeth right now.

"Namjoon."

"The man from the store?" Chan nodded again,

"I realise that I'm not in your eyes but what I do I do for the good of people and Namjoon...Let's just say he has his own selfish reasons for what he and his crew do. Killing for fun, killing for the sake of killing-" You felt fear ripple through your body and Chan could see that so he stopped talking about it. Namjoon was well known everywhere, everyone had heard of Namjoon and if they hadn't they were either stupid or didn't live in Seoul.

"So I have a target on my back because he saw us together the other day?" This was Chan's idea in the first place, he shouldn't be feeling guilty about this but he was. The plan was to lure Namjoon out, but since the day you spent alone together he'd been having second thoughts about the entire thing. He figured being seen by Namjoon would bring him out of hiding and have him admit that he killed Chan's wife. The bonus would be having him scare you so much you would be too terrified to leave Chan's side, so now why was he feeling so guilty for doing it? All he wanted to do was make you stay with him forever, he would be the one to protect you.

"I promise to look after you, he won't ever hurt you." You could tell by the way he was holding your hands, squeezing them and staring into your eyes that he was sincere. Which was what scared you. He was closer to believing that you actually liked him, while you were now stuck with staying with him forever or being on the run from two big mafia leaders who would both want you dead.

"Why do you come to these events?" You asked, trying to change the subject to anything else.  You could avoid the feeling of being scared if you just put it off long enough.

"I have my reasons," He linked your hands together as he sat in the back of the car. He didn't know how to act around you, you were being so nice to him lately and he didn't want to do anything to change that.

"Do I have to be scared about being out with you?" You questioned, your mind wandering back to Namjoon who was going to be at the event.

"No. I promised I would never let anything happen to you and I meant it." He squeezed your hand. You felt somewhat comforted by it, knowing that he was starting to fall for you hard enough to want to protect you. But then your mind went back to Changbin's threat and your conflicting heart. You could already feel yourself feeling sorry for him, clearly whatever had happened with his wife was affecting him badly. Maybe he was just that good guy that got pushed too far. One half of you was wanting to stay with him, but your brain was still on fire battling the thought about him doing what he did to Mrs Lu and the story your ditzy barmaid had told you. That chan had been the one to kill her, anyone with more than three brain cells could tell he hadn't though, that the story of him killing his wife was complete bullshit.

"Thank you." You whispered, looking out of the window nervously as you thought about the event. It was highly publicised meaning someone was going to get your photograph of you sitting there.

"Did you mean it?" You questioned quickly, he hummed at you and turned to stare at your face wondering what you were talking about.

"Did I mean what?"

"About taking me to see my grandfather?" He could tell by the look on your face that you were excited about the thought of it. But you were doing your best to stay calm about it and so he nodded at you. It could be a reward for you if you were good tonight while you were out with him.

"I'll take you if you behave tonight." You smiled shyly at him and nodded, promising you would be good. You'd promised not to try and get away and you meant it.

"Then let's get to it. Maybe get a nice photo to give to him?" Chan asked you, as he looked at the photographers outside the hotel. You nodded and the door opened, flashing lights started to blind you and you held onto Chan as he helped you out of the car.

"How do you deal with this?" You giggled, looking at him as he walked with you side by side. He linked his arm around your waist and smiled down at you trying to look good for the cameras. He paused at the bottom of the steps, a red carpet had been laid out and people were screaming questions at everyone who was walking there. It was like Chan was some kind of famous celebrity and people wanted to interview him.

"I smile and get on with it, I never liked this side of my life. They glorify the things I do and it's wrong, even if I do this all for the right reasons it makes it look good when it's not." You stared up at him as you walked towards the doors, lost in your own world as if the rest of the world melted away as you stared into his eyes. But he kept his head forward trying to focus on not falling over.

The evening was going admirably. You were in the middle of a huge event hall in the hotel, the walls were all white with marble columns to keep up the extremely high ceilings. The boys and you were all at the second-floor bar that looked down over at the rest of the party,

"Y/n?" You turned, to see a man around 6'0 smiling at you and coming over to you. You were standing at the bar while Chan went to stand beside someone and talk. The man was wearing a black suit with a blue tie on, you'd never seen him before so you had no idea how he knew your name. Jisung was supposed to be watching you but he was on his phone, you didn't blame him though it must have been boring watching someone all night.

"Hello." You greeted coldly, looking to try and get Jisung's attention but it wasn't going to work. Changbin was nowhere to be seen and Hyunjin was in the bathroom. You were starting to panic when the man reached for your hand, lifting it to his lips and kissing it gently, looking at the ring on your finger but he didn't care about it.

"May I have a dance? I'm Clarke."

"No, I don't think my fiancé would like that." You were trying to come up with some excuse to get away from him, but Chan's back was to you as he spoke to someone about a donation he was making to them. You didn't know how to get him to turn around without screaming his name, and causing a scene not something you wanted to do in such a nice place.

"I'm sure he won't mind one dance." He pulled you over towards the staircase that led down to the bottom floor. Your heart began to pound, if the boys looked up to see you missing it would be bad news for you, but if Chan looked and saw you with another man it would be bad news for him.

"My fiancé really wouldn't like this, he's-"

"He's an idiot by letting you stand alone and giving you such a cheap-looking metal ring." His hand landed on your waist. Your eyes locked onto the back of Chan's head, hoping that somehow he would feel the stare and turn around.

"Please let me go." You begged him, but his hand slipped down to your waist while his other grabbed onto your ass squeezing it softly. He trailed his hand to your thigh so you slapped him across the face, the room was so packed no one noticed. So you began rushing over to Jisung, he was the closest one to you and the nicest one out of them all. Your hand gripped onto his bicep as you pleaded for him to help you,

"Help." You whispered, he looked at your panicked face and then saw a man coming over to you holding his face with a red mark across his cheek.

"You slapped him?" You nodded, explaining that he started touching you and you had to get away.

"You little whore, dressing like this and expecting not to be touched?!" You whimpered, as the man began storming towards you. Jisung took control of the situation quickly,

"Chan!" Chan turned around and saw the worried look on your face and then the man. He was livid, he stormed to your sight and took your face in his hands turning it side to side to look at you. The man stopped as he realised it was Chan that you were with and not someone else, he began begging for them not to hurt him but Changbin grabbed onto his arms.

"You okay? Did he hurt you?" You shook your head and Chan turned around to punch the man who'd grabbed you the way he did,

"Changbin, take him back to the house and put him up in the basement I'm not through with him." He ran his hands through his black hair. You noticed curls starting to form as he pulled it from the styling gel, you never knew he had curly hair. It was something you were trying to focus on to keep you calm.

"You sure you're okay? Did he hurt you at all?"

"No, I'm fine. He just grabbed my ass and my-" He went to follow Changbin out of the hotel, wanting to kill him for even thinking about touching you. You grabbed onto his hand,

"Don't leave me please." You urged him and he stared down at your hand on his wrist. He felt his heart begin to pick up and he nodded at you, even if he did feel like it was his fault for leaving you alone when he promised he wouldn't.

"Fine. Let's go and have a drink." You followed him towards the bar and ordered a scotch, he did the same and looked at you. He could tell that the fact that the man touching you was bothering you. You were scared, having someone touch you like that in such a public place, you had no idea what could have happened if he'd gotten you down the stairs.

"You promised to watch me, you promised. What if that was Namjoon that got hold of me?" He shook his head at you. He cupped your cheek in his hands running his thumb over your skin trying to calm you down.

"I took my eyes away for two seconds, it's not my fault you're so beautiful that everyone wants you. I promise he'll get what's coming to him. No one will hurt you or touch you." You realised what he meant by that and you stared at him,

"You're going to kill him..." It was a statement rather than a question, about what he was or wasn't going to do. But he heard your voice crack and he stared at you wanting to search for any signs that you didn't want him to, but all he could see was the sign of you being okay with it.

"Yes." He answered blandly, but he didn't care, no scumbag should get away with touching people that clearly asked him to stop.

"Good. Make him pay for it." He liked this side of you, you had no idea where it was coming from but you wanted the man to pay for what he'd done to you. It always happened in the bar you used to work in, sleazy men would touch whoever they wanted and get away with it and you were sick of it. It was about time that somebody took care of it.

"I'll make sure he does." He promised, kissing your cheek and then looking around for the time,

"We have time for a dance before the auctioning starts." He took your hand, you downed the drink of scotch, following him to the staircase to head down for a dance together.

Both of you lost in your world as Namjoon watched from across the room, he asked his right-hand man for the information they had gathered on you. It was strange how you'd seemingly come from nowhere and were now being announced as Chan's fiancé. They told him about your family history, your grandmother using his money and dying leaving bills unpaid. He smirked watching you being waltzed around by Chan, he had a plan now. Chan's hand was placed on your waist, while his other hand held onto yours, slowly leading you along the floor swaying back and forth with you.

"You look great tonight, by the way, I don't know if I mentioned that." You laughed at Chan and nodded at him, even though you didn't believe what he was saying.

"You didn't have to, the boys did it for you. Apparently, I'm 'whoa'." He chuckled and nodded in agreement with them.

"They're right. You look gorgeous." You could feel your cheeks heating up as he complimented you,

"Dip." He said, you stared up at him as he dipped you down and smiled at you. A camera flash went off capturing the happy moment making you both momentarily blind.

"Look at the happy couple." You both stood up to see Namjoon staring at you,

"Y/n Y/l/n, and Bang Chan...surprising couple." You cleared your throat and Chan wrapped his arm around your waist, he knew Namjoon would have gotten to know everything about you by now.

"Can I see the ring?" You didn't have a chance to decline, Namjoon just took your hand in his and stared down at the small silver band around your finger.

"Huh. Seems simple for someone like Chan to give you." Chan didn't have time to say anything,

"I asked for something simple, inexpensive to prove how much I wanted Chan for Chan and not who he was and his money." Namjoon nodded along and looked at Chan.

"May I dance with her?" Chan stepped aside willingly, not wanting to disobey Namjoon and cause a scene. He watched as Namjoon began to dance with you in the same way Chan had been doing before.

"I know he took you against your will, do you want to get out of here?" You stared up at Namjoon as he stared off behind you, trying not to make it look obvious about what he was talking about.

"He didn't take me against my will, I went with him. I love him." You seemed so convincing you almost believed yourself, Namjoon stared down at you shocked that the words had even left your mouth.

"Love him? My dear, that almost sounded convincing to me. You barely know the man, you've been with him less than a week." He kissed your forehead and brought you into a hug,

"You better watch out my love, as soon as he turns his back, you're mine just like his ex. I'll assume he told you the horror story but be warned, I will kill you just like I did to her...Paint his living room a nice shade of red again." He left you alone and you stood staring at the back of his head, Chan frowned coming over to you.

"What's wrong? Did he hurt you? Say something?" You turned to look up at Chan and he stared down at you, you looked terrified, more terrified than the night he'd killed Mrs Lu.

"H-He said I have to watch out before you turn your back and I end up just like your ex." Chan's hand on your hip tightened and you whimpered moving away from his grasp.

"What does that mean? What happened?" He looked around and shouted Seungmin and Jeongin over. It gave him the confirmation he'd been using you for, but now his blood ran cold at the thought of Namjoon threatening you. It wasn't just Chan using you for information anymore, he liked you a lot and now you were in real danger

"Give them the money, bid on the weekend away, I need to take her home. Namjoon threatened her." His hands were on your arm and he was rushing you out of the hall and towards the exit of the building,

"Smile and look happy, if Namjoon knows he's scared you he wins." You nodded and started smiling up at him, he took your hand in his and sighed.

"Come here," He bent down to pick you up bridal style and you squealed, wrapping your arms around his neck and staring into his eyes.

"What are you doing?" You asked, looking into his eyes and nowhere else as the cameras flashed at you both running to the car.

"You move too slowly in those heels. I have to get you home where I can keep you safe." He sat you in the car and told Felix to drive fast and not stop for anything.

"What happened with your ex...Is he going to get me?" You panicked and he linked your hand in his.

"I'll tell you everything, I promise, but right now you need to get home and get you safe. I'm not going to let you die okay." He kissed your cheek and you laid your head on his shoulder, staring at the back of Felix's head as you drove to the house.

"You'll be fine here, no one can get in here, it's all secure," Chan said as he stood in your door, you were laid in the bed dressed in an oversized shirt and some shorts. You hadn't stopped shaking since the moment you left the hotel and he still hadn't told you what happened with his ex. Just that she was dead and it was Namjoon's fault. You were more scared of Namjoon than you ever had been of Chan,

"Get some sleep, we'll talk in the morning. Seungmin is right outside if you need him." You nodded at him and he turned to leave the room without another word.

"Goodnight." You called out and he nodded at you, saying it back before leaving the room quietly, shutting the door behind him.

You laid there for an hour while you listened to the wind and rain outside, the thunder started and you wanted to cry. Thunderstorms used to make you calm but tonight it seemed to make everything scarier, like in a horror movie. Every sound made you think it was someone trying to break into the mansion, specifically your bedroom. You got out of the bed and snuck out of the door, Seungmin was asleep so you could sneak out of the door without being heard. You tapped on the bedroom door belonging to Chan but there was no response, you were about to turn back when thunder clapped so loudly you jumped. Rushing into the room the door banged, he jumped up and pointed a gun at you thinking you were an intruder,

"Chan!" You held up your hands to make him see that you were free of any weapon, and that you weren't going to hurt him, but you let out a whimper as he kept it tracked on you,

"I'm sorry." You whispered, turning to stare at him. He was wearing a black t-shirt and some shorts, he shook his head and stared at you, panicked that something was wrong.

"I'm sorry! Did you hear something?" He questioned you, he got up from the bed to get closer to you.

"No, no." You whispered, shaking your head and looking around his room, it was the one room you hadn't been in yet.

"Do you want me to put the gun away?" You nodded frantically, slowly lowering your hands down now that he knew who it was in his bedroom this late at night.

"Yes please." He took the gun and put it away in the drawer beside his bed and cleared his throat, rubbing the back of your head as you got closer to him.

"What's wrong?" He sat down on the bed and you walked into the room sitting down beside him.

"I'm scared, he said he'd kill me, Chan." You admitted and he sighed, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and drawing you closer to him,

"What if he gets me?"

"I won't let it happen. I won't let him anywhere near you, you're mine and I'm going to protect you." He repeated, pulling you to lay down on the bed with him. He spooned you and began tracing patterns into your skin as a way of trying to calm you down. You let the 'you're mine' comment pass, it felt nice for him to say that to you right now, it was something you needed to hear.

"I promise." He kissed your shoulder blade and you closed your eyes, feeling safe and protected around him enough to fall asleep for the first time all night.

"Get some sleep. I promise to protect you." He kissed your shoulder again and you hummed, shuffling back towards him wanting him to hold you closer. But you turned around to face him instead, deciding now would be a good time to question him since you weren't tired.

"Aren't you scared of him?" He shook his head and ran his hand over your cheek, tracing his thumb along your skin as he stared into your eyes. He had to be strong to you even if it meant telling you he wasn't scared when he was.

"He holds no power over me, I don't care about him but if he comes anywhere near you-" Your hand on his cheek calmed him down, you could see him growing more and more agitated, but he was shocked that you'd touched him like this. All the other times you seemed to move away but you were willing, getting close to him and touching him willingly.

"Thank you for protecting me, not just with Namjoon but with that guy at the party." He nodded, the guy had been locked in the basement the moment the boys got him home and Chan was planning on dealing with him in the morning.

"Anything for you." You looked at him, your eyes glancing from his to his lips trying to fight back the feeling of wanting to kiss him but it was hard. You close your eyes and leant in and he leant down pressing his lips against yours. As soon as he kissed you the world fell away, it was all slow and soft something you'd never thought would happen to you, it felt like it was something from the books you'd read as a teenager. It was comforting and his hand fell away from your face and to your hip, dragging your body closer to him so there was no space between you any more. You could feel his heart beating against your chest as he brought you closer, pulling away and running his thumb along your bottom lip.

"Do it again," You begged him to kiss you one more time, your mind blank as your heart took over your actions. He pressed his lips against yours, the world falling away in an instant, but this time the kiss was hot and full of passion. His tongue ran along the seam of your lips and you parted them for him wanting nothing more than to make out with him all night. The kiss was sloppy and you could taste the scotch you'd both been drinking that night. You wrapped your arm around his neck and he chuckled, pulling away from you not wanting to take things too far too soon.

"Enough for one night," He placed a gentle kiss on your lips again to satisfy you and you shifted on the bed, laying your head on his chest to fall asleep while listening to his heartbeat. He laid on his back looking at the ceiling while he listened to your breathing trying to make it the focus of his thoughts. As long as you were still breathing he had something to fight for, something to stop him going after Namjoon right away and coming up with some kind of plan. For you it felt safe right next to him, it was strange and didn't make sense in your head but your heart was telling you it felt right to be there with him no matter what he'd done. The kiss had been too good for you to ignore the chemistry between you both. He kissed the top of your head as your eyes got too heavy to keep them open any longer, and you stopped fighting to keep them open, drifting away into the best night's sleep you or Chan had ever had in the longest time.

Tagline: My fantastic and wonderful editor I would be nowhere without! @moonprincessdiviniation​ @taestannie​ @kneel-begyourpardon​ @calling-dips-on-j-hope​ @hugs4chan​ @ncitythoughts​ @inseonqt​ @cloudsgathering​ @atletino​ @mischiefmakerliesmith5​ @freckledquokka @happygirl327​

[queenofimagines]

Deny Deny Deny

Request: “can I get a jj x reader where jj shows signs of liking the reader, but whenever the pogues point out he has a crush on her, he denies it. thank you :)”

Warnings: None

Read Part 2 here

It didn’t take long for JJ to realize that he was completely and totally fucked. Since the day you walked into his life, all sunshine and laughter, JJ understood what his friends meant when they talked about love. Now he understood why John B and Sarah went to such great lengths to protect each other and why Pope and Kiara would always hold each other close, even on days that were so hot that sitting out on the marsh didn’t seem so desirable. JJ understood now what it felt like to be around someone 24/7 and never grow tired of them. It scared him, how totally into you he was, and even though he basked in the feeling for a while he soon realized that he’d have to shake whatever love bug had bit him. His plan? Well, he didn’t really have one, but he knew that in these times of uncertainty he would have to stick to what he already knew how to do: deny, deny, deny.

It was a bright and beautiful Sunday when you and your friends decided to take the HMS Pogue out to sea, a little farther from the marsh but not so far that the boat would be at risk of capsizing. With the sun beating down on the Outer Banks, all of you decided that the best course of action would be to take a quick break from your every day routines and relax. On the way out the boys had talked up near the driving console while you, Sarah, and Kiara stayed in the back, the sound of the boats engine as well as the waves making your respective conversations hard to hear. Every once in a while, the boys would erupt in laughter, looking back at you all as if planning something sinister, but all of you brushed it off as them just messing around. When you finally anchored, you figured out just how wrong you were. You barely had time to scream when you felt JJ’s arms wrap around you before your entire body was thrown into the cool waters of the Pamlico Sound, Kiara and Sarah following you after having been thrown by John B and Pope. You all resurfaced, glaring at the boys and promising to get back at them before dissolving into laughter as they jumped in with you.

After hours of swimming about you had grown hungry, along with Sarah and Kiara it seemed as they both began to swim back towards the boat, Kiara immediately rummaging through the snacks and drinks she had brought for your trip. You moved, following Kiara and Sarah onto the boat, not realizing that JJ had stopped partaking in a splash war John B had started to watch you. As you ascended onto the boat, JJ couldn’t help but think of how perfect you looked. There you stood, confident as ever in your swim suit wringing out your hair, haloed by the sun behind you, almost angelic. Hell, if JJ didn’t know any better, he probably would have thought you were an angel. You were way to pretty and way too nice and way too smart to be anything else. Before JJ could even scold himself for thinking of you that way he was hit in the face full force with a wave of water created by Pope.

“You’re drooling,” was all he said when JJ looked at him with wide eyes.

“Am not,” JJ childishly answered. Pope raised his hands in surrender, barely struggling to tread water with just his legs while John B snickered at JJ’s reaction. Not pushing the topic anymore the boys decided to follow your lead and head onto the boat to join in on your little snack break. What was supposed to be a quick break turned into the rest of your afternoon, all of you sitting in a circle and talking well into the night. As the sun set, the temperatures cooled and you soon found yourself shivering at the cold wind that had begun to pick up.

“Cold?” JJ asked, simply.

“Yeah,” you replied, eying the sweatshirt that JJ had abandoned early in the day. “Can I have your jacket?”

Without so much as a second thought JJ reached over to grab his sweatshirt before turning back to you, tapping your arms as a signal for you to raise them and slipping his sweatshirt onto you. You smiled at the warmth, even more so when you smelled his cologne. From the other side of the boat, John B made a whipping motion, making eye contact with Pope as they began to laugh, Kiara and Sarah soon joining in. Neither you nor JJ knew what was so funny. Scratch that, you didn’t know what was so funny, JJ on the other hand knew what was happening and could only hope that you didn’t. You quickly let it slide though, being distracted by the moon and realizing that it was about time you all headed back.

When you reached the mainland, you were quick to say your goodbyes. JJ insisted on walking you to your bike, offering to let you keep his sweatshirt until the next time you saw each other so that you wouldn’t be too cold on your way home.

From inside the Chateau, the Pogues could hear your soft conversation, all of them listening as if it was their favorite TV show. When JJ came back with a wisp of a smile on his face and flushed cheeks they knew they had get you two together somehow.

“So...” Kiara started, not knowing where to start. “Y/N’s bathing suit was pretty cute today.”

“...Yeah? I guess,” JJ answered, confused as to why Kiara would suddenly bring up your bathing suit. Truth be told, Kiara didn’t want to outright say anything about JJ’s feelings towards you. While all of the Pogues were aware of them, bar you, none of them had explicitly mentioned them, all wary of how JJ might react. Sarah, having only just recently joined the gang, didn’t share that worry.

“You guess? She looked hot as fuck and you know it JJ. You know how I know you know? Because you like her.” Sarah stated, a triumphant grin on her face.

“What? No! No, it’s not like that. I don’t like Y/N.” JJ rushed his sentence as if his life depended on completing it. He was so sure he was hiding his feelings pretty well, none of them had said anything about it before, at least not so boldly.

“Yes you do.” Pope added, beginning to gain confidence that they could get JJ to admit that he was in love with you.

“No! I don’t! She’s not my type, anyway.”

“She’s exactly your type,” John B said. “She’s funny and adventurous and can even keep up with you at keggers. She’s exactly your type and you are so smitten with her that you’d be willing to let her take home your favorite sweatshirt even though you once almost threw me into the wall just for moving it off the couch.”

All at once everyone began listing reason JJ was, in fact, in love with you. The sound of everyone’s voices and the fact that so many different things were being said at the same time caused JJ to become overwhelmed and snap.

“Alright! Enough already! I don’t like her, okay? Did she look hot today? Sure, but I would have said that about any one of you if you’d asked. And yes, I let her use my sweatshirt because she was basically freezing her skin off. And John B the only reason I almost threw you into the wall was because you had gross cheese dust all over your fingers when you moved it and stained it orange when I was planning on wearing it to a party later. See? There’s an explanation for all of it, so I’ll say this one last time. I am not in love with Y/N!” JJ ended his rant by defiantly crossing his arms.

“We never said anything about love.” Kiara replied. JJ’s eyes widened, immediately realizing his mistake.

“W-well you didn’t have to, it was implied.”

“Mhm.” Was all Kiara said before switching the conversation to a different topic, sensing that if they continued on the current path, none of them would be having much fun anymore.

JJ finally took a seat, fully admitting to himself once and for all that he was in love with you, that he wanted you to be his and his alone. He thought about what it would be like to be your boyfriend; what it would be like to kiss you and cuddle you and hold you. He couldn’t stop the smile from forming as he thought about taking you on dates and celebrating your anniversaries. He thought about what it would be like to be the reason your eyes lit up or what it would be like to fall asleep next to you and wake up with you still in his arms.

So yeah, JJ knew he was completely and totally fucked, but the more he thought about it, the less he seemed to mind.