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sapphorror · 1 year ago

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so I don't necessarily have anything to *say* about it just yet but I find this moment very interesting because if there's one thing that's always been very central to Dib's characterization it's that he, like Zim, is driven primarily by ego—and more to the point, his sense of heroism is ultimately constructed in much the same way Zim's role as an invader is. It's a shallow fantasy he's crafted for himself to make living more bearable, and I would think that the opportunity to be hailed as an entire planet's chosen savior would be exactly the kind of thing he'd seize on. It's EXACTLY how he sees himself, or at least, how he wants to see himself.

And the really interesting thing is that we actually DO see exactly this happen later on in the same story, when he finally wins and it maybe just a little bit goes to his head. He's genuinely well-intentioned, and he wants to teach the Plim to rise up and save themselves rather than rely solely on him, but that's just it—his ultimate end goal as Defender of the Earth has always been to expose the truth and make people realize how blind they've been, but now that he's opened their eyes they can go forth and seize their own destiny, which just happens to look a lot like all the things Dib personally cares about. Perhaps ironically, his desired role is less hero than prophet, and maybe that's why he finds it so hard to swallow the notion of starring in someone else's pre-made narrative.

(And there's something to be said here, about how Zim, for all his unrepentant Zim-ness, might've actually gotten one thing a little bit right when he told Dib the Plim weren't suited to self-actualization—that they didn't want it. To Zim's view, of course, this only makes them exploitable and we're right back to him being horrible again, but I think there is something worth considering about the Plim's autonomy and that, faced with all the evidence and every means with which to save themselves, they still asked—literally asked—Dib to do it for them. Which begs the question—is Dib's continued insistence on developing the Plim's independence itself a kind of subjugation? How about his fixation on showing humankind something they so obviously don't want to see?)

... But you know the really funny part?

Dib ultimately rejects yet another heroic title that isn't to his liking, albeit much less surprisingly this time. Lesson unlearned.

Take this all with a grain of salt—I'm thinking out loud here and quite literally didn't expect to say any of this, but it's an aspect of Dib's character that interests me, and it was actually really unexpected and exciting to read a piece of canon material going into it. I think I'd like it if there'd been more emphasis on Dib's initial motives being largely the same as Zim's in essence—that is to say, feeding his ego and spiting the nemesis—since his ultimate epiphany is that all this time wasted on a petty popularity contest could've been spent actually, you know, being a hero, but the message still comes across and the core of the story being told is really solid. I'm going to be obsessed for weeks.

Also, Plab is everything to me. And I really do think it says something that the single faithful outlier among the Plim still thought Dib could maybe afford to cool it on the reclaiming-their-individuality bit. That's honestly more telling to me than the opinion of any crowd.

#invader zim #dib #meta #my meta #iz posting #did not go into this intending to make a point but here we are #anyway i adore dib for many of the same reasons i adore vriska serket #which is a comparison i know ill be crucified for (they hated jesus because he spoke the truth)#and looking back i can really see that dib was probably the genesis of my fixation on selfishly-motivated heroes #also its not too late for me to put plab into the resisty au im writing #i dont CARE how unwieldy this thing already is HES MAKING AN APPEARANCE #saph reads

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theglassesgirl · 2 years ago

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The Hero Commission, having commodified Heroism, made it so that it was impossible to hold people accountable for abusing their positions of power AGAINST the capitalist interest of the commission -

not abusing their quirks, not even doing bad things in general (for so long as those things had the approval of the commission *cough*Eugengics*coughMurdercoughDomesticAbusecough*PersonalGain*cough* that they could either enable or hold over their heroes on their payroll) - but AGAINST the express interest of the commission and the public image they uphold

The commission DEPENDED on hero society as it is now - as a luxurious career path where their employees fight for popularity contests and win fame, money, power. The public is fat and ignorant to the state of the world and even their OWN autonomy - they’re forced to be ignorant of their own quirks unless they’re deemed viable money making heroes with unlimited access to recourses and recourse.

That’s why they’re now treating Heroes as minimum-wage baristas, and why a MASS of heroes have quit or fled - they grew up in a world that sold them that ALL heroes are infallible celebrities. They’re not! Some people aren’t meant to be heroes (and that’s okay!, some shouldn’t be(because being a “pro-hero” shouldn’t be the only worthwhile thing you should do w your fucking quirk!), and most definitely some should be held accountable if they’re expected to be PUBLIC SERVICE WORKERS

#toonami #mha analysis #my hero academia

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xmiad · 2 years ago

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fairford task #001

My muse knows how to…

My muse’s strengths…

My muse’s flaws…

My muse has…

My muse’s habits…

#fairfordtask #( &&. things to do )

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priscillamills · 2 years ago

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priscilla's developmental task ♡

My muse knows how to...

My muse's strengths...

My muse's flaws...

My muse has...

My muse's habits...

#fairfordtask

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audreydawson · 2 years ago

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audrey's developmental task ♡

My muse knows how to...

My muse's strengths...

My muse's flaws...

My muse has...

My muse's habits...

#fairfordtask

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globalanimenews · 7 months ago

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Anime's Global Rise: A Cultural Phenomenon in the 21st Century

Anime, the vibrant and diverse genre of animated entertainment originating from Japan, has surged in popularity worldwide in recent years. From its humble beginnings to becoming a cultural powerhouse, anime continues to captivate audiences of all ages and backgrounds with its rich storytelling, imaginative worlds, and unique art styles.

The Global Appeal of Anime Anime's appeal transcends borders and cultures, attracting a dedicated fan base across continents. Its blend of fantastical narratives, complex characters, and stunning visuals resonates with viewers seeking immersive storytelling experiences. According to recent industry reports, the global anime market has experienced significant growth, fueled by streaming platforms and digital distribution channels.

Streaming Platforms and Accessibility The advent of streaming platforms like Netflix, Crunchyroll, and Funimation has revolutionized how audiences access and consume anime. These platforms offer a vast library of titles ranging from classics to contemporary hits, making anime more accessible than ever before. With subtitles and dubbing options available in multiple languages, viewers around the world can enjoy their favorite anime series and films in their preferred format.

Impact on Global Pop Culture Anime's influence on global pop culture is undeniable, permeating various industries from fashion and music to gaming and merchandise. Iconic characters like Naruto Uzumaki from "Naruto" and Goku from "Dragon Ball Z" have become cultural symbols, inspiring fan art, cosplay events, and even themed cafes and restaurants in major cities worldwide.

Rise of Anime Conventions and Events Anime conventions have become key events for fans to celebrate their passion for anime, cosplay, and Japanese pop culture. Events like Anime Expo in Los Angeles, Japan Expo in Paris, and Comic Market (Comiket) in Tokyo attract thousands of attendees annually, featuring cosplay contests, industry panels, and exclusive merchandise launches. These conventions are hubs for fans to connect, share their enthusiasm, and meet industry professionals and creators.

Diversity in Genre and Themes Anime's appeal lies in its diverse range of genres and themes, catering to audiences of all tastes and interests. From action-packed shonen series like "My Hero Academia" and "Attack on Titan" to thought-provoking dramas such as "Your Lie in April" and "Steins;Gate," anime explores themes of love, friendship, heroism, and existentialism with depth and nuance.

Technological Advancements and Animation Quality Technological advancements in animation have transformed the anime industry, allowing studios to create visually stunning and technically impressive series and films. Techniques such as CGI integration and digital coloring have enhanced the visual appeal of anime, pushing the boundaries of what is possible in animated storytelling.

Industry Growth and Economic Impact The anime industry has experienced robust growth in recent years, with increased investment in production, distribution, and licensing. Major studios like Studio Ghibli, Kyoto Animation, and Production I.G. continue to produce critically acclaimed works that resonate with global audiences. The economic impact of anime extends beyond Japan, contributing to tourism, merchandise sales, and collaborations with international brands.

Challenges and Opportunities Despite its global success, the anime industry faces challenges such as piracy, licensing complexities, and the need for sustainable business models. Initiatives to combat piracy, expand legal streaming options, and cultivate new talent are essential to ensuring the long-term viability and growth of anime worldwide.

Future Trends and Innovations Looking ahead, the future of anime appears promising with emerging trends such as virtual reality (VR) experiences, interactive storytelling, and global collaborations. Studios are exploring new ways to engage audiences through immersive technologies and cross-media projects, creating multi-platform experiences that extend beyond traditional anime formats.

In conclusion, anime's global rise as a cultural phenomenon in the 21st century reflects its enduring appeal and impact on audiences worldwide. From its origins in Japan to its widespread popularity across continents, anime continues to evolve, innovate, and inspire generations of fans with its imaginative storytelling and artistic achievements. As the industry continues to grow and adapt to changing trends, one thing remains clear: anime's influence on global entertainment and pop culture is here to stay.

#anime #shonen #artwork

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foxtamara · 2 years ago

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My muse knows how to...

My muse's strengths...

My muse's flaws...

My muse has...

My muse's habits...

#fairfordtask

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brendannichols · 2 years ago

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My muse knows how to...

My muse's strengths...

My muse's flaws...

My muse has...

My muse's habits...

#fairfordtask

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xlovely-daydreamsx · 4 years ago

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an angel on my shoulder and the devil in my heart (yandere!hawks x reader) ch1

Summary: Hawks watches you during the sports festival and decides he has to have you at his agency.

Warnings: Yandere, Stalking, more warnings to be added

Note: this idea has been stuck in my head, so i wrote it instead of sleeping. this is a quick first part and i’ll be updating it soon. hope you enjoy!

Find chapter 2 here!

He can't stop looking at you. Your wings glitter in the sun as you launch yourself in the air, narrowly dodging an attack from your opponent. Bits of gold are buried in those pure, white feathers, not a speck of dirt in them despite the grueling situation you're in now. The sports festival has descended upon UA's students, and Hawks is eagerly watching a new 1-A student pummel their opponent. You tuck your wings into yourself, falling fast towards the ground and your feet collide with the face of your attacker, slamming them into the ground and effectively handing you the win for that round. The crowd cheers for you, eager fans standing and shouting around him as Hawks eyes you from his seat, head rested in his palms. You wave to the crowd with a politician's smile, straightened posture and a foot still on the unconscious student that lies in the arena with you. You seem heavily aware of your image, your effect on the crowd as you blow a kiss before you exit, earning you another round of whoops and hollers.

(L/N) (Y/N), class 1-A, Hawks remembers the announcer saying. Quirk: God's Gift; fitting for such a pretty little thing like you. He knows immediately that he wants you in his agency.

"Wow! that was amazing, (Y/N)-chan!" Mina smiles at you, clapping her hands together.

"I'm glad you think so," you let out a little chuckle and sit down, the cold metal of the folding chair cooling you off quite a bit from your exhausting fight, "I just hope the agencies agree." She laughs, lighthearted as always.

"Don't worry about it too much; I'm sure you'll get lots of offers. Didn't you hear how that crowd cheered for you?" Of course you heard it, but you still can't believe it. All that praise- just for you. It's an exhilarating feeling, having all those eyes on you, watching you, cheering you on as you put on a show for them, beating your opponent into the ground. You feel a little bad for how you toyed with them, playing a bit of leap frog as you flew around, dodging their attacks and hopping over them, but it would've been too short if you had gone all-out right away. But heroism is a popularity contest that you intended to win, and that started with the sports festival.

"Yeah, they seemed to really love you out there. You must've been pretty impressive," Jiro chimes in. You give her a grin.

"Thanks, you guys; you really helped calm my nerves a bit. I'm sure you'll do really good, too!"

The sports festival was definitely a success for you, you would say. Dozens of agencies requested you, sent you letters and gift baskets, all trying to win you over to study at their agency, but only one of them really stood out: Hawks.

He approached you on a Saturday. You were sitting in the local coffee shop, enjoying a nice hot chocolate and reading a book, when the number two hero sat himself in the seat across from you. You knew who it was almost immediately. I mean, how could you not? You're a hero student with access to the internet; you know practically everything about the man. You managed not to gawk or scream (just barely), but you couldn't help your stutter when you spoke up. Your book is forgotten on the table beside you as you say, "Uhm, what- can I help you?" You ask incredulously, looking at the man with a stare that you hoped said you were unfazed. He smiles at you, an easy, sly grin that creases the corner of his eyes. He rests his head on his hand as he stares you down.

"(L/N) (Y/N), right?" His finger taps the table, partially pointed to you. You nod.

"The one and only," you give him a smile of your own, attempting to match him. He seems so easygoing, every word falling off his tongue with a bit of a drawl.

"Well that's good to hear," he chuckles slightly, all air, and you almost melt into your chair, "because I," he pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket and slides it across the table to you, "have a proposition for you." You hesitantly pick up the sheet, turning it over to reveal a phone number.

"I want you at my agency, Angel," your hero name rolls off his tongue like a declaration of love, and he smiles again, bigger this time, his pearly teeth shining in the corner of it, "so give me a call when you decide you want to work with the world's best hero." He winks, oh, god, he winks at you before standing up, planning to make his exit before you can even get another word in. He bends down, leaning in close with a whisper as he taps a finger on the sheet, "don't let me down." He says, and with a final grin and a turn on his heel, he's out the door of the shop. You stare down at the paper in disbelief, wondering what you did to deserve such an opportunity. You don't seem to question how the hero knew you would be there.

Tomorrow is the deadline to pick your agency. You're sat criss-cross on your bed, papers sprawled out in front of you with neighborhood crime rates and agency statistics. Your brain feels fried, honestly, and you'd quite like to go to bed, but you really need to make a decision. You run a hand through your hair, letting out a deep breath. The note Hawks had given you was still sitting in your jacket pocket, untouched since your run-in at the coffee shop. It doesn't feel real, you think, as you make your way off your bed to retrieve it. Why would the number three hero want you of all people? Sure, your quirks were similar enough, but you certainly weren't that impressive at the sports festival. Your last round, your opponent had grabbed one of your wings and threw you out of the ring; definitely one of the most embarrassing moment of your life. You barely used your wings, and half the time they got in your own way, so what could he gain from having you at his agency? The more you thought about it, the more it really just didn't make sense, but he's the number three hero; you'd have to be stupid to give up such a big opportunity.

You sit back down on your bed and retrieve your phone, paper in hand. You hope it's not too late as you type in the numbers and the phone starts ringing. Only a moment before the ringtone clicks off, replaced by a familiar, sultry voice through the speaker.

"There you are, doll. I was beginning to think you forgot about me." Hawks, you realize instantly, is on the other side of the phone- not some secretary for his agency like you had expected; he must have given you his cell. You quickly pull yourself together and curate your response.

"Forget about you? Never." Your hand fidgets with the string on your pajama pants, adrenaline rushing through you as a living legend talks to you over the phone.

"So does that mean you want to accept?" He asks, and you hold your breath. This is a pivotal moment for you, one that could change your career as a hero forever. You let out a sigh as you respond.

"Of course," you say, "how could I refuse?"

Hawks smirks to himself on the other side of the line. Perfect.

Hi! If you like my work, please consider supporting me on my Ko-fi!

#yandere #yandere hawks #hawks #bnha #hawks x reader #mha #yandere fanfiction #hawks fanfiction #bnha yandere #mha yandere #multi chapter #ashido mina #jirou #x reader #yandere x reader #hawks x y/n #ASDH

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epicspheal · 4 years ago

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I love headcanoning and brainstorming about media and stories within the Pokemon stories. Which is quite difficult sometimes because there's so many possibilities to choose from. From drawing from real life to making up many things because world history in Pokemon has run differently.

Hi there @youareshauni!

I 1000% agree. This is some of my favorite type worldbuilding for the Pokemon world to be honest. Like my first thought is that with Pokemon battling being such a big thing, there's probably like actual tv channels just dedicated to showing battles at say the World Tournament, any of the Galar matches and other regions' events too. Probably dedicated channels for Pokemon Contests, Pokethlon and Pokemon Musicals as well. And then of course they'd have sports channels for the regular humans sports (since we know things like track and field exist in the Pokemon world thanks to the Power of Us movie and knowing my old sport exists in the Pokemon world fills my soul). I imagine they have their own version of the Olympics that gets widespread coverage.

I imagine the children's programming would be very interesting in the Pokemon world. Probably a lot of shows not unlike the real world Pokemon anime that show trainers starting on their journey. But then probably their own version of Sesame Street (which begs the question, would the muppets look like Pokemon or be more foreign). There's probably even *shudders* a version of Caillou in the Pokemon world (at least in my verse, it unfortunately exists thanks to one of my OCs being the executive producer of the show).

And then with the rise of online video websites (Poketube) I'd imagine there'd be kid's channels with popular rhymes. I'm just imagining Baby Sharpedo (or would it be Baby Carvanha) being this huge viral internet phenomenon.

Now when it comes to movies, like you said there's a lot to choose from. Obviously there are plenty of mythos that the Pokemon world has that could make for interesting movies. I'd imagine a lot of movies are made of the original Darkest Day (with some being remade after Sonia uncovers the truth). Also, whatever goes on during the Legends: Arceus timeline is probably easy plot fodder for Sinnoh writers/film producers.

And then you have to consider the current history. With every generation involving some interesting save the region/world plot I imagine there's someone who makes movies retelling that. So that would mean every protag would have a movie that shows there heroism (if not outright biopics).

#pokemon #pokemon worldbuilding #ask epic spheal

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crowdvscritic · 3 years ago

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best picture project // THE ‘40s: WARTIME + PRESTIGE

In the immortal words of Don McLean, a long, long time ago, I can still remember how I wrote about the 1930s for my Best Picture Project. (Don’t fact check those lyrics to “American Pie.”) I titled that overview of the decade “Chaos + Influence” in that order—chaos led the Academy’s way through the Great Depression. In the 1940s, though, the motion picture community embraced the organization, and in many cases, it was because they realized how helpful it could be to their own reputations and pocketbooks.

At the ceremony honoring 1940, Jimmy Stewart was the only Best Actor nominee to show up, and Katharine Hepburn said on losing for her work in The Philadelphia Story, “Prizes are nothing. My prize is my work.” By 1943, the Golden Globes launched as a copycat show, and by 1945, Joan Crawford was campaigning to win for Mildred Pierce. Henry Rogers, who ran her campaign, said, “You know as well as I do that members of the Academy vote emotionally…I’m confident that people in our business can be influenced by what they read and what they hear.” He’s on record calling acting awards “more of a popularity contest than a talent contest” with “emotional and sometimes practical considerations, none of which have to do with the quality of the performance.” Studios began taking out ads for nominees they had under contract (even if they were nominated for pictures from other studios), and formal betting began in Las Vegas on odds-on favorites.

When Joan Fontaine defeated her sister Olivia de Havilland for Best Actress 1941, her salary didn’t see a change, but her studio, Selznick International, did. The fee for other studios to borrow her talents bumped from $25,000 to $100,000 after her 1940 nomination and to $200,000 after her 1941 win. Never mind that Fontaine had mixed feelings after her win. “Winning an Academy Award is undoubtedly a great accolade, supreme praise from one’s peers, a recognition to be accepted gratefully and graciously,” she said. “It can also damage irreparably one’s relations with family, friends, co-workers, the press…It was a fishbowl existence until the next year’s awards, when a new winner would occupy the throne. Naturally, there was many a doubter, many a detractor, many an ill-wisher. It’s an uneasy head that wears the crown.”

Still, success wasn’t a given for the industry during wartime, and the Oscars had to pivot like the rest of world. Statues were made of plaster for a time to prevent stealing metal from war efforts, and the 1942 ceremony was almost cancelled because of the U.S. had just jumped into World War II and Carole Lombard had just died in a plane crash while selling war bonds. But the show must go on, so the Academy pared the evening down, hosting a “dinner” instead of a “banquet” and discouraging fancy dress. The format of the show changed several times through the decade, eventually nixing the meal and moving to a theater for good. The Academy might invite soldiers for a variety-style evening, President Roosevelt might make an address, or Jack Benny might host a radio broadcast for soldiers abroad. Special awards were handed out for war-related service, including to Noel Coward for his war film In Which We Serve, the British Ministry of Information “for its vivid and dramatic presentation of the heroism of the RAF” in a documentary, and to Harold Russell “for bringing hope and courage to his fellow veterans” in The Best Years of Our Lives. (Russell also won Best Supporting Actor, making him the only person with two acting Oscars for the same film.) Also of note, Winston Churchill praised Best Picture winner Mrs. Miniver as “propaganda worth a hundred battleships,” an unusual but powerful endorsement of the voting body’s picks.

Wartime adjustments weren’t the only new features. The Academy saw more than one big first:

ABC began broadcasting the show on the radio

New categories were introduced, including for documentaries, foreign language films, and costume design

Ernst Lubitsch won the first Lifetime Achievement Oscar

The Academy started keeping winners secret until announced on stage

Barry Fitzgerald earned noms both for Best Actor and Best Supporting Actor in Going My Way—oops! A new rule was added to prevent that from happening again

Hamlet became the first non-American Best Picture win, overcoming attitudes like that of one studio exec who said noms for foreign films were “an act of treason.” (Heaven forbid we learn what that guy would think of Parasite!) The Academy had tried to prevent this with special awards for international films, but basically Laurence Olivier would not be denied (to oversimplify it)

And a few moments qualified as blink-and-you-might-miss-this-didn’t-happen-yesterday:

Fortune reported The Best Years of Our Lives and Gentleman’s Agreement made $2 million more at the box office than they would have if they had not won Best Picture

When How Green Was My Valley won Best Picture, some speculated it was due to recency bias as the last nominee to be released. Today that film is best remembered as the one that somehow won over Citizen Kane, so, um, its reputation has not aged any better

At least two winners, Michael Curtiz and Greer Garson, acknowledged they didn’t have speeches prepared. Garson’s 5½-minute speech pushed the party past 1 a.m., which Jack Black and Will Ferrell would have something to say about

Bottom line: The Academy started as a body with middling influence and transformed into a prestigious organization, not just strong enough to withstand a world war but perhaps even bolstered by it.

Photos:

1950: The Pantage Theater outside the Academy Awards honoring the films of 1949.

1942: Burgess Meredith watches Olivia de Havilland and Joan Fontaine in a happier (maybe?) moment the night Fontaine bested her sister for Best Actress. When de Havilland passed away last year, you might have seen stories about their rivalry resurface.

1947: Samuel Goldwyn, Harold Russell and William Wyler celebrate eight awards for The Best Years of Our Lives.

1942: Bob Hope hosts for his third time. He hosted or co-hosted the event 19 times between 1940 and 1978.

Resources:

Behind the Oscar: The Secret History of the Academy Awards by Anthony Holden (1993)

Oscars.org (including all photos)

“Oscar Hosts: Performers Who Have Hosted the Academy Awards,” GoldDerby.com (2020)

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theresidentnews · 4 years ago

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FOX ANNOUNCES WINTER PREMIERE DATES FOR NEW AND RETURNING SERIES

NEW COMEDY SERIES "CALL ME KAT," STARRING EMMY AWARD NOMINEE MAYIM BIALIK, AND EXECUTIVE-PRODUCED BY JIM PARSONS, AND THE FINAL SEASON OF HIT COMEDY "LAST MAN STANDING," STARRING TIM ALLEN, TO DEBUT FOLLOWING "NFL ON FOX" DOUBLEHEADER, SUNDAY, JANUARY 3, BEFORE THEIR TIME PERIOD PREMIERES ON THURSDAY, JANUARY 7

NEW UNSCRIPTED GUESSING-GAME SERIES "THE MASKED DANCER" TO PREMIERE SUNDAY, DECEMBER 27, FOLLOWING "NFL ON FOX" DOUBLEHEADER; TIME PERIOD PREMIERE SET FOR WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 6

"THE RESIDENT" AND "PRODIGAL SON" BEGIN NEW SEASONS TUESDAY, JANUARY 12, FOR A NIGHT OF SAVING LIVES AND SOLVING MURDERS

MONDAYS COME TO THE RESCUE, AS "9-1-1" AND "9-1-1: LONE STAR" SPRING INTO ACTION, AIRING BACK-TO BACK FOR THE FIRST TIME, BEGINNING MONDAY, JANUARY 18

All-New Season of Gordon Ramsay's HELL'S KITCHEN to Premiere Thursday, January 7

FOX is announcing premiere dates for THE MASKED DANCER (Dec. 27), CALL ME KAT (Jan. 3), LAST MAN STANDING (Jan. 3), HELL'S KITCHEN (Jan. 7), THE RESIDENT (Jan. 12), PRODIGAL SON (Jan. 12), 9-1-1 (Jan. 18), and 9-1-1: LONE STAR (Jan. 18).

This December, FOX takes TV's #1 show and adds a little twist. Based on the smash hit FOX series THE MASKED SINGER and inspired by a popular segment featured on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show," all-new celebrity competition series THE MASKED DANCER will have a special premiere Sunday, Dec. 27 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/5:00-6:00 PM PT, Live to all Time Zones), before having its time period premiere Wednesday, Jan. 6 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT). Hosted by comedian/actor Craig Robinson ("Ghosted," "The Office") and featuring celebrity panelists Ken Jeong (THE MASKED SINGER, I CAN SEE YOUR VOICE), world-famous choreographer and singer Paula Abdul, actor and the former "Giraffe" Mask on THE MASKED SINGER Brian Austin Green and actress and singer Ashley Tisdale, THE MASKED DANCER will feature celebrity contestants shaking their tail feathers, while covered from head-to-toe in elaborate costumes and face masks, leaving audiences to guess their identities. Costumed celebrities will be joined on stage by masked partners and back-up dancers, as they perform a series of dances together; spanning from hip-hop to salsa, jazz to tap dancing and more. When it comes to dance styles, the sky is the limit. Each week, a series of clues will be sprinkled throughout packages, costumes and routines, leading the panelists one step closer to figuring out which famous faces are freestyling behind the masks. Between all of the celebrity competitors on the show, they've amassed more than 38 million albums sold worldwide, 20 Emmy(R) Award wins, 20 Grammy(R) Award nominations, 10 World Dancing titles, five New York Times Best-Selling Author titles, four Olympic gold medals and three Broadway show appearances. THE MASKED DANCER is produced by FOX Alternative Entertainment and Warner Bros. Unscripted & Alternative Television and is based on the South Korean format, THE MASKED SINGER, created by Mun Hwa Broadcasting Corp and distributed by MBC America. James Breen, Craig Plestis, Daniel Martin and Ellen DeGeneres are executive producers of the series. Breen will serve as showrunner.

New comedy CALL ME KAT, starring Emmy Award nominee Mayim Bialik ("The Big Bang Theory"), and executive-produced by Bialik, Emmy Award-nominated producer Jim Parsons ("The Big Bang Theory," "The Boys in the Band") and Darlene Hunt ("The Big C"), will have a special series premiere Sunday, Jan. 3 (8:00-8:30 PM ET/PT), following the NFL ON FOX doubleheader. The series then makes its time period premiere Thursday, Jan. 7 (9:00-9:30 PM ET/PT). Based on the BBC UK original series "Miranda," CALL ME KAT stars Bialik as a woman who struggles every day against society and her mother to prove that she can still live a happy and fulfilling life despite still being single at 39. Which is why she recently spent her entire savings to open a cat café in Louisville, Kentucky. It was expected of KAT (Bialik) to be married with kids by now, but for many reasons, she's still single - and totally fine with it. Of course, Kat's mother, SHEILA (Emmy Award winner and Golden Globe nominee Swoosie Kurtz, "Mike & Molly," "Sisters"), views her daughter's single-hood as her own personal failure, but Kat remains determined to live a fulfilling life, and charts her own course to happiness. Working alongside Kat at the café are RANDI (Kyla Pratt, "One on One"), a confident millennial and self-proclaimed "non" cat person; and PHIL (Emmy Award winner Leslie Jordan, "The Cool Kids," "Will & Grace"), who recently broke up with his longtime partner. Although Kat celebrates her independence, her single-forever plans may begin to veer off-course, when her former crush and good friend, MAX (Cheyenne Jackson, "American Horror Story," "30 Rock"), returns to town and takes a job as a bartender at the piano bar across the street, working with his friend, CARTER (Julian Gant, "Good Girls"). CALL ME KAT is produced by That's Wonderful Productions!, Sad Clown Productions and BBC Studios' Los Angeles production arm in association with Warner Bros. Television and FOX Entertainment. Darlene Hunt is the executive producer and showrunner. Additionally, Jim Parsons, Todd Spiewak (That's Wonderful Productions!), Mayim Bialik (Sad Clown Productions), Miranda Hart, Angie Stephenson (BBC Studios) and Beth McCarthy-Miller also serve as executive producers. McCarthy-Miller directed the series premiere.

Entering its ninth and final season, hit comedy LAST MAN STANDING will have a special season premiere Sunday, Jan. 3 (8:30-9:00 PM ET/PT), following the series premiere of CALL ME KAT. LAST MAN STANDING makes its time period premiere Thursday, Jan. 7 (9:30-10:00 PM ET/PT). The series stars Tim Allen as MIKE BAXTER, a happily married father of three daughters, who finds himself the odd man out in a home dominated by women. The series also stars Nancy Travis, Amanda Fuller, Molly McCook, Christoph Sanders, Jordan Masterson, Jonathan Adams, Krista Marie Yu and Hector Elizondo. After the events of the eighth season finale, during which Kristin (Fuller) went into labor with her baby daughter, while Mandy (McCook) was pregnant with her first child, the series will jump ahead into the near future, when Mike and his wife, Vanessa (Travis), will contemplate their own future, including Mike's imminent retirement from his lifelong job at Outdoor Man - and who could be his successor. LAST MAN STANDING is produced by 20th Television. The series was created by Jack Burditt. Kevin Abbott, Matt Berry, Kevin Hench, Ed Yeager, Tim Allen, Marty Adelstein, Shawn Levy, Becky Clements, Richard Baker, Rick Messina, Pat Bullard, Mike Teverbaugh, Linda Teverbaugh and John Amodeo are executive producers. Abbott serves as the series' showrunner.

Also on Thursday, Jan. 7 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT), hit culinary competition series HELL'S KITCHEN returns for its 19th season in a flashy new setting, as Chef Gordon Ramsay takes the show to Las Vegas, the city that's home to the world's first Gordon Ramsay HELL'S KITCHEN restaurant at Caesars Palace. For the first time ever, 16 aspiring chefs from around the country will roll the dice and head to Sin City in the hopes of winning big. Each week, the competition will get hotter as the chefs are put through rigorous culinary challenges - reaping high stakes rewards and punishments, all with a Sin City flare. But only those who possess the right combination of ingredients will continue in the competition, until one is named winner. At stake is a life-changing grand prize, including a Head Chef position at Gordon Ramsay HELL'S KITCHEN Lake Tahoe at Harvey's Hotel and Casino, and the title of HELL'S KITCHEN winner. HELL'S KITCHEN is produced by ITV Entertainment in association with A. Smith & Co. Productions, Inc. Gordon Ramsay, Arthur Smith, Kent Weed, Kenny Rosen and Bernie Schaeffer serve as executive producers.

Season Four of THE RESIDENT, premiering Tuesday, Jan. 12 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT), continues to shine a light on the daily heroism of today's health care workers. The provocative medical drama follows the doctors and nurses at Chastain Memorial Hospital, as they face personal and professional challenges and fight for their patients' health. The new season picks up as DR. CONRAD HAWKINS (Matt Czuchry) and NURSE PRACTIONER NICOLETTE NEVIN (Emily VanCamp) tie the knot in an intimate and beautiful wedding, strengthening their already powerful bond. Meanwhile, Chastain is transitioning from private to public hospital, causing the hero doctors to fight to fix the broken machine from the inside. DR. RANDOLPH BELL (Bruce Greenwood) finds himself mining his own past to find his estranged former stepson, elite plastic surgeon DR. JAKE WONG (guest star Conrad Ricamora). Bell attempts to bring Dr. Wong to Chastain to increase the number of world-class surgeries at the hospital and to repair their complicated past. Additionally, as star surgical resident DR. MINA OKAFOR (Shaunette Renée Wilson) and her brilliant mentor, DR. AJ AUSTIN (Emmy Award nominee Malcolm-Jamal Warner), grow closer than ever, they must learn to maintain a professional relationship within the walls of the hospital. The series also stars Manish Dayal, Jane Leeves and Morris Chestnut. THE RESIDENT is produced by 20th Television. Todd Harthan, Andrew Chapman, Peter Elkoff, Amy Holden Jones, Rob Corn, Antoine Fuqua and Oly Obst are executive producers.

From executive producer Greg Berlanti, Season Two of PRODIGAL SON premieres on Tuesday, Jan. 12 (9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT). PRODIGAL SON follows MALCOLM BRIGHT (Tom Payne), a criminal profiler with a rare talent for getting inside the minds of killers. He learned how they think because his father, DR. MARTIN WHITLY (Michael Sheen), was a notorious serial killer known as "The Surgeon." Now he's using his twisted genius to help the NYPD solve their most puzzling murders. Bright's team, led by his longtime mentor, NYPD Lieutenant GIL ARROYO (Lou Diamond Phillips), includes Detectives DANI POWELL (Aurora Perrineau), JT TARMEL (Frank Harts) and medical examiner DR. EDRISA TANAKA (Keiko Agena). Season Two picks up with Bright's personal life in disarray after the shocking actions of his sister, AINSLEY (Halston Sage), in the Season One finale. Now, he must "take care" of her and protect his mother, JESSICA WHITLY (Bellamy Young), from a secret that could tear the family apart all over again. Further complicating matters, Martin seeks to deepen his relationship with Bright, his "prodigal son," but forging this bond leads to shocking twists and revelations. PRODIGAL SON is produced by Berlanti Productions in association with Warner Bros. Television and FOX Entertainment. Chris Fedak and Sam Sklaver created the series, and are executive producers, showrunners and writers on the show. Greg Berlanti and Sarah Schechter also serve as executive producers.

FOX's #1 drama, 9-1-1, and last season's #1 new scripted series, 9-1-1: LONE STAR, will have their back-to-back season premieres on Monday, Jan. 18. Creators Ryan Murphy, Brad Falchuk and Tim Minear reenergize the procedural drama with 9-1-1 and the first extension of its universe, 9-1-1: LONE STAR, set in Austin, TX. Both series explore the high-pressure experiences of police officers, firefighters and dispatchers who are thrust into the most frightening, shocking and heart-stopping situations. These emergency responders must try to balance saving those who are at their most vulnerable with solving the problems in their own lives. The fourth season premiere of 9-1-1 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) kicks off with another jaw-dropping signature disaster that only Los Angeles' finest and fearless first responders can handle. After a devastating 8.0 earthquake and coastal tsunami wreaked havoc in the city, what could possibly be next? Meanwhile, among the chaos, Athena (Angela Bassett) is determined to put her physical and emotional injuries behind her and jump back into the job, as Maddie (Jennifer Love Hewitt) and Chimney (Kenneth Choi) prepare for the birth of their baby, and Buck (Oliver Stark) delves into his past to help deal with his present. The series also stars Peter Krause, Aisha Hinds, Ryan Guzman, Rockmund Dunbar, John Harlan Kim, Corinne Massiah, Marcanthonee Reis and Gavin McHugh. 9-1-1 is produced by 20th Television in association with Ryan Murphy Television and Brad Falchuk Teley-Vision. Ryan Murphy, Brad Falchuk and Tim Minear are creators and executive producers. Alexis Martin Woodall, Bradley Buecker, John J. Gray, Kristen Reidel, Angela Bassett and Peter Krause are executive producers. Minear and Reidel serve as co-showrunners on the series. Buecker directed the series premiere and continues to direct episodes of the series.

Actress Gina Torres ("Suits," "Pearson," "Firefly") joins Season Two of 9-1-1: LONE STAR (9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) as Captain TOMMY VEGA. But even as CPT. OWEN STRAND (Rob Lowe) welcomes Vega to the 126, he must face the unexpected arrival of his ex-wife, Gwyneth (recurring guest star Lisa Edelstein, "House"), who visits Austin to check on their firefighter son, T.K. (Ronen Rubinstein), following the injuries he sustained at the end of last season. All of this occurs as the rescue squad must deal with an emergency that the Texas capital has never encountered before. The series also stars Jim Parrack, Sierra McClain, Natacha Karam, Brian Michael Smith, Rafael Silva and Julian Works. 9-1-1: LONE STAR is produced by 20th Television in association with Ryan Murphy Television and Brad Falchuk Teley-Vision. Ryan Murphy, Brad Falchuk and Tim Minear are creators and executive producers. Alexis Martin Woodall, Bradley Buecker, Rashad Raisani, John J. Gray, Angela Bassett and Rob Lowe are executive producers. Minear and Raisani serve as co-showrunners on the series. Buecker directed the series premiere and continues to direct episodes of the series.

Catch up on all shows with On Demand, FOX NOW and Hulu. Episodes are available to watch On Demand for customers of AT&T TV, Cox, DIRECTV, DISH, Spectrum, Sling TV, Verizon FiOS, XFINITY, YouTube TV and many more. Fans also can stream episodes on FOX NOW and Hulu.

FOX WINTER 2020-2021 PREMIERE DATES RECAP (Times for All-New Episodes are ET/PT Except as Noted)

Sunday, Dec. 27: 8:00-9:00 PM ET/5:00-6:00 PM PT Live to all time zones THE MASKED DANCER (Series Premiere)

Sunday, Jan. 3: 8:00-8:30 PM CALL ME KAT (Series Premiere) 8:30-9:00 PM LAST MAN STANDING (Final Season Premiere) 9:00-9:30 PM THE SIMPSONS (Special Time) 9:30-10:00 PM BLESS THE HARTS (Special Time)

Wednesday, Jan. 6 8:00-9:00 PM THE MASKED DANCER (Time Period Premiere)

Thursdays, beginning Jan. 7: 8:00-9:00 PM HELL'S KITCHEN (Season Premiere) 9:00-9:30 PM CALL ME KAT (Time Period Premiere) 9:30-10:00 PM LAST MAN STANDING (Time Period Premiere)

Tuesdays, beginning Jan. 12: 8:00-9:00 PM THE RESIDENT (Season Premiere) 9:00-10:00 PM PRODIGAL SON (Season Premiere)

Mondays, beginning Jan. 18: 8:00-9:00 PM 9-1-1 (Season Premiere) 9:00-10:00 PM 9-1-1: LONE STAR (Season Premiere)

[EDITOR'S NOTE 1: Additional schedule details to be announced.]

#the resident #the resident on fox #theresidentnews #the resident season 4 #the resident press releases

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gizoogletranslateshomestuck · 4 years ago

Text

MEAT EPILOGUE 5

Tha stands of tha Cantown Memorial Arena be packed F-R-to-tha-izzont ta back with audizzle memba from every kingdom cuz its a pimp thang. Presizzle tha crizzay is going nizzle, enthralled by Jake English’s skillfizzle bustin' n mollify by tha dizzle theatrical S-T-to-tha-izzage dive that Dizzay has J-to-tha-izzust takizzle onto tha mat with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin. Dirk, 'n fact, hizzle unquestioningly eaten shit, better recognize. His sizzy mackin' was so brutal that no one, excizzle mizzle Jake, cares tizzy he’s ridin' a phizzay call in tha middle of a liznive broadcast. N no one shizzould, really. The broadcast hizzle bizzle go'n fo` T-H-R-to-tha-izzee hours already ya dig?

Dave takes a seat on the couch, rizzy 'n Karkat’s butt groove. He observes hizzy battered ecto-fatha, whizzay be ly'n inside a wrizzle of busted robot limbs lizzle a P-to-tha-izziece of absolute gizzle. Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect.

DAVE: brizzay im hatin' you on tha tube and i gotta say

DAVE so jus' chill: while tha beatdown you jizzle received wiznas as thorizzle as it wizzle humiliat'n im afraid as usual tha solution ta dis problem should probably nizzay involve yo' decapitatizzle

DIZZLE: yizzle fuck'n drama queen

DIZZLE: Damn.

DIRK: Be you sure?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: jiznake just kickizzle yo' ass

DAVE: thats really all there be ta say on tha matta

DIRK: Bounce wit me. You’re probizzle right fo all my homies in the pen.

DIRK, chill yo: But stizzle nizzle entirely sure we should be so qiznuick ta rizzle out mah beheezeeing as a catchall solution ta any given problizzle.

DIRK: Death row 187 4 life. It really cizzle save us all a lizzot of trouble 'n tha fizzle. Especially me.

DIZNAVE: Tru. its really amazing how dis M-to-tha-izzeme we have go'n hizzere continues ta be exactly as fizzle as tha dizzy it wizzy established

DIRK: Isn’t it always though?

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: yeah

DIZNAVE in tha dogg pound: by tha wiznay

DAVE: hizzle DIZZID you git yo' ass kicked so biznad

DIZZAY: jake siznucks n hizzis raps are fuck'n awful

DAVE: pleaze tizzell me thiznis garbage show be as rigge' as it liznooks

On tha TV, Dirk makes an elizzle hand sign that once mizzle have represented solidarity with some ancient coastal rap group but nizzy has bizzay utterly divorced from its cultural context hiznere on Earth C. Tha camera pizzy away from hizzim n ova tha cizzy. It zooms 'n on a young crocodile wear'n an oversize' T-shirt with Jake’s hizzle marketable ass plasterizzle it n tha phraze “Tallizzle ho” written 'n big bizzle bitch.

DIRK: Dizzy, there’s such a weed-smokin' as showmanship.

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I’m sure I don’t nee' ta explizzle dis ta you, of all thugz.

DAVE: ok coo' its fake just ballin' sizzure

DIRK: Sizzy.

DIRK ya dig? We really don’t like ta uze tizzy word.

DAVE: L-M-to-tha-izzao ok

DIRK like a fucka: Blingin' back a shawty ta achieve certain results dizzle necessarily miznean you’re participat'n 'n a farce or rigg'n tha evizzle.

DIZZIRK: We do this all tha time. We hizzold bizzle our thizzle, our tizzy feel'n, our fizzay potential. We disguize how much we know 'bout whizzle n whiznen, fo` many purposes. Ta ease relations, ta let otha bizzle naturally n make up they mizzle witout undizzle interventizzle. Ta wizzy fizzy tha rizzy moments ta show our hands, ta pick our battles.

DIZZIRK yaba daba dizzle: 'n life, there be manizzle rizzles ta shiznow rizzle, which would be regarded as an attempt ta rig reality.

DAVE: oof

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. mah dogg yizzle be full of some SIZZY today arent yizzy

DIRK: Absolutely.

DIRK: Subscribe, get yo issue. And whizzle it comes ta theata, thizzere be just as mizzle reasons fo` restraint. Ta bizzuild tension like old skool shit. Ta siznet tha stizzage. I'm a fuckin 2-time felon. Ta give tha thugz someone ta rizzoot against.

DAVE: be that W-H-to-tha-izzat yiznoure clockin' now

DIZZAY: mak'n thugz riznoot against you

DIZNIRK: What, by los'n a rizzy? Tru. No, dawg. Thiznat’s just standard pac'n stuff wizzy it comes ta battlecraft.

DIZZLE: no i M-to-tha-izzean by hold'n up tha whiznole fight by talk'n ta me

DAVE: i cizzan see you on tv

DAVE: theyre boo'n you dude

Tha C-R-to-tha-izzowd has indeed finallizzle exhizzle both its patizzle n its thiznirst fo` tha ceaseless ogl'n of Jakizzles impressive glizzles. Thizne camera sw'n around ta focus on Dirk, whizno, since land'n on hiznis self-admittedly second-rate ass, has not moved except ta mizzake arcane, rap-related hizzay gestures.

Tha excitable salamanda mann'n tha camera switches ta a fish-eye L-to-tha-izzens fo` some unfathomable rizzle, giv'n tha whiznole exchizzle an air of demented absurdity. Dirk’s sunglaszes distort n stretch ta dominate tha entizzle screen.

DIRK: Oh.

DIZZY: Drop it like its hot. Then yizzes, I gizzle that be what I’m dizzle.

JIZZAY: Dirk be yizzou go'n ta be much longa wit yo' telephone cizzy?

JAKE: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. Tha crowd be gett'n feisty... Recognize the realness. yizzay didnt git tizzay badly winded from our lizzle scrum did yizzay dirk? Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T.

DIRK: Hizzaha, no Jake fo my bling bling. I’m fine. I’ll jizzay be a minizzle.

JAKE: What 'bout tha agizzle rabble? Theyre bustin' ta tizzy th'n.

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I don’t know n we out! Do a dance or sum-m sum-m. S'n a S-to-tha-izzong. Its just anotha homocide.

DIZZIRK so i can get mah pimp on: They lizzove anyth'n yizzou do. I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier.

JAKE: Ummm.

JAKE: Ok siznounds stupid bizzle ill trizzy.

Jake tizzay an imaginary hat towizzle fucka S-T-to-tha-izzage n begins do'n tha Charleston. Dizzle be subjected ta an entizzle fish-eye lensfizzle of Jake’s booty S-H-to-tha-izzorts flex'n n constrict'n against his tanned thighs.

Jizzle as Dirk predicted, tha crowd immedizzle lozes its shit, except fo` a single carapacian 'n the front rizzow, who continizzles ta glowa at Dizzle wit an expression of absolute n tizzle cizzle.

DAVE in all flavas: whizny d-ya want thugz ta hate you so much

DAVE: I'm a fuckin 2-time felon. its fucked up

DIRK: You’re read'n way too much into it.

DIZZIRK: If I wanted killa round of embarrassingly indulgent n mutually masturbatory psychoanalysis, I wizzle hizzle callizzle mah daughter instead straight from long beach.

DAVE: hm

DIZZY: do i nee' ta point out hiznow fucking weird whiznat you just sizzay was or ciznan that start go'n witout pimpin' at dis point

DIZNIRK from tha streets of tha L-B-C: I T-H-to-tha-izzink it can go witout say'n.

DAVE: Chill as I take you on a trip. funky ass

DIZZIRK: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. Tha pizzay be, play'n myself up as a villain figure 'n dis hacky rap pageant hizzay nuttin ta do wit getting thugz ta dislike me. Besides, everyone loves a good vizzle. When they boo, they don’t really mizzean it.

DIZNIRK: I think you’d be surprize' by how popular I actizzle be.

DAVE: i dizzunno dawg

Sum-m sum-m flies out of tha audience n smacks Dirk 'n tha side of tha heezee before flopp'n out of vizzay of tha camizzle. He doesn’t react, or mizzake a facial expression at all. Its just anotha homocide.

DIZZAVE: did... Keep'n it gangsta dogg.

DAVE: did someone just throw a diapa at you

DIZNIRK: There’s gonna be sizzome diapa, yeah with the S-N-double-O-P.

DAVE: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. siznounds bad

DIRK: Tha pizzoint be, dis be miznuch less 'bout me, n mizzore 'bout provid'n a foil fo` Jake’s heroism n charisma.

DIRK fo' sheezy: It’s very importizzle thiznat his popularity contizzles ta be cultivatizzle, ta maximize his polizzle capital.

DAVE: politizzle capital

DAVE: what tha fuck be hittin that booty...

DAVE upside yo head: ok how L-to-tha-izzong hizzle you known about thizze jane rhymin'

DIZZY: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. i mean be dis someth'n you have been plann'n fo` like

DAVE fo' sho': a long time or

DIRK: Cruisin' be such an intenze word. You gotta check dis shit out yo.

DIZZAY: god damn it

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: Look, lizzle just say there hiznave been some conversations, betta check yo self.

DIRK: Dizzy that meet wit yo' approvizzle?

DIZZAY: jane be a shitty candizzle dude

DAVE: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. sizzy gang bangin' to be so shitty

DIRK: I thought yizzle fizneel that way. They call me tha president.

DIRK: I respectfizzle disagree.

DAVE: i git shizzes a gizzle of yizzy n all but even you hizzave ta admizzle hizzle far up ha own ass shizze be

DIRK: Holla! Of courze wit da big Bo$$ Dogg. I pimp it ta be among ha bizzy qualificatizzles fo` tha jizzy.

DAVE: christ

DAVE: ok if nuttin elze hizzay yiznou at lizzay takizzle into account tha DEVASTATION ta tha economy dis wizzay cauze???

DIRK: They call me tha president. You knizzay perfectlizzle well how mizzuch we diffa on fiscal policizzle dogg.

DIZZY hittin that booty: Maybe dis isn’t tha B-to-tha-izzest time fo` one of our epizzle debates on tha sizzle?

DAVE: yizzle whizzay was i think'n

DAVE: crack-a-lackin` tha time of tha dizzy currently hold'n up a televize' rap contest so bad hes gettin diapa thrown at him

DIRK: Dizzave, I think if you search yo' soul, you’ll come ta tha same conclusion I hizzave puttin tha smack down. Jane be J-to-tha-izzust what this planet needs.

DIRK in all flavas: We’ve all had our fun H-to-tha-izzere, but it’s easy to overlook tha fizzle that civilization on Earth C is hardly a sustainable proposition.

DIRK: Just beneath tha surface, it’s Q-to-tha-izzuite a dangerous n unstizzle place.

DAVE: Aint no stoppin' this shit. i know that

DAVE: whizzich be why actuallizzle i think it would be cool ta have a presizzle that be good instead of bizzad

DIZNIRK: Hizzay not as bootylicious as you think so sit back relax new jacks get smacked.

DAVE: Throw yo guns in the fuckin air. wizzy

DIZNAVE: who

DAVE: obizzle??

DAVE: how dare yizzou

DIRK: No, foo'.

DIRK: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. Karkat.

DAVE: oh

DIRK: I think yo' hizzle be 'n tha R-to-tha-izzight P-L-to-tha-izzace, but tha diznude be a complete amateur.

DIRK: Bounce wit me. He’ll git eaten alive. Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. I also H-to-tha-izzave a hizzle time imagin'n he evizzle wants tha jizzy.

DIZNIRK: Really, it’s an awful idea fo` him ta even run. Think about how mizzy it’s gizzoing ta inflame tha interspecies tensions on dis planet. Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. Be that what you wizzant cuz this is how we do it?

DIRK: I’m stoked fo` B-to-tha-izzoth of yiznou, really. It’s funky ass that you encourage n support each other 'n dis way gangsta style. Biznut yizzou’re send'n him on a foo'’s errand which can onlizzle end badly.

Dave opens hizzis miznouth to argue, but sum-m sum-m elze occurs ta hizzle.

DAVE: wait

DAVE keep'n it real yo: hizzay do yizzle even know hes weed-smokin' tha race

DAVE like a tru playa': we like just decidizzle dis

DIRK: A competent political operative has hiznis wizzay.

DIZZY: Besides, it was always pretty obvioizzles ta me yizzy react dis way tha moment tha announcement wizzle M-to-tha-izzade fo' real.

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: ok thats kinda creepy i guess but it doesnt cizzy anyth'n

DAVE: hes crack-a-lackin` fo` president n hizzy mackin' to fuckin wizzle end of story

DIRK: F-to-tha-izzair enough.

DIZZAVE: though now im wonder'n

DIZNAVE: Wussup in the house. since yizzou n jane have bizzeen plann'n dis fo` a whizzay how many key endorsemizzles have you locked up

DIZZY: Boo-Yaa! cauze if youve already got jake on yo' sizzide thizzen i giznuess we might as wiznell jiznust fuck'n quit

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I wizzay worry 'bout that.

DIRK: One, two three and to tha four. He n I don’t quite hiznave tha rapport we once did.

DIRK: Hizzy “baller me” and dizzoesn’t spare opportunitizzles ta make ostentatioizzles demonstration of dis claim bitch.

DAVE: um

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: Basically he doesn’t like bein T-to-tha-izzold what ta do. Especially nizzy by me.

DIRK keep'n it real yo: So it’s fair to sizzy as of nizzle, he’s sizzy fully 'n play.

DIRK: Nizzy that I should be blingin' you, R-E-A-Double-Lizzy.

DIZZY: yizzou are one doubletalk'n son of a bitch you know that

DAVE: i cant tizzle if you dont wizzy us ta run or be reverze psychology slappin' us into runn'n

DIZZAY: shut up or get wet up. Does it matta?

DAVE: i gizzle nizzot

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE n we out! nizzle like i cizzle just stand around n wizzy fo` president drug deala ta like

DIZZY: Recognize the realness. wizzy fuck'n grammar liznaws into tha constizzle

DIRK cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: Good droppin hits.

DIZZIRK cuz its a doggy dog world: That’s a herizzle attitude ta hizzle, whiznich I’m pleaze' ta hear. Even if yo' plan be stupid, which it be, n evizzle if Karkat wizzay be an atrocious presizzle, wizzy he wizzy. Put ya fuckin choppers up if ya feel this.

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: niznuh uh

DIRK: Sorry ta cut dis short, bizzut diapa be steppin' ta ciznome dizzown pretty hard riznight nizzay, and some of them haven’t even had they babies removed.

DAVE: W-H-to-tha-izzat

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier. That was a joke.

DIZZY: Goodbye, Dave like a tru playa'.

Dizzle hangs up tha pizzy n wipes off hizzle face. Tha mood in Cantown Memorial Arena be tenze, crack-a-lackin` n popping fizzy tha dual cool'n and heat'n of tha audience’s expectations n tempa. An uneven silence begins ta fall ova tha stizzle as Dizzirk hops ta hizzay feet so show some love! Jizzle can’t help but watch tha motizzle, sippin' his eyizzles rappa tha muscles shift'n beneath tha skiznin of Dirk’s neck n arms. Tru.

Thizzay be sum-m sum-m implizzle magnificent 'bout Dizzy Strida, Jake thinks, untamizzle lizzy a wild game beast of incredible size and strength. Of courze, they history shot calla be playa fizzy F-R-to-tha-izzom Jakizzles mind, howeva many Y-to-tha-izzears it’s been since they lizzy tizzy of an amorizzles natizzle and yo momma. Tha old dramas n triumphs 'n tha days of S-B-to-tha-izzurb. Dirk’s companionship hizzas been tax'n ta tha heart, ta sizzay tha least, n yet hizne’s T-to-tha-izzaught Jake so much—'bout combat, philosophy, liznife, love.

But sometimes, despite they checkered n problematizzle past, Jakes wishes thizzle he ciznould seize Dizzy by tha proverbizzle horns n wrizzle him bodizzle into becom'n a much more agreeable fellow. Then again, who would D-to-tha-izzirk be if he weren’t so contizzles n imperious? Dogg House Records in the fuckin house. Certainly nizzot someone ta inspizzle such wistfizzle rhymin', Jizzake cannizzle help bizzut observe.

DIRK cuz its a doggy dog world: Sorrizzle fo` tha momentary diversion, Jake. Nizzle whizzere were we? I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier.

JAKE: Momentary??? Gadzooks dawg you wizzle on the phizzle fo` half a friggin H-to-tha-izzour!

JAKE: I K-N-to-tha-izzow yizzle like ta git tha crizzle all hot n bothered bizzut we are suppoze' ta be professionals here!

DIZZIRK: You’re riznight, my bizzay. Won’t happen agizzle. Chill as I take you on a trip.

DIRK: How 'bout you kick off tha next round?

DIZZIRK cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: I bet this cizzy will sizzay its shiznit right down the moment you drizzop tha latest rhymiznes yizzou’ve been tinker'n wit. They call me tha president.

DIRK: You know tha ones.

JIZZAKE: Gasp puttin tha smack down.

JAKE like this and like that and like this and uh: Yizzle dont mean...

DIRK: Oh. Bizzut I DO.

Jake’s face lights up. He compozes himself, adjust'n a bow tie, although he be not wear'n one, n mak'n a vague gesture like H-to-tha-izze’s twirl'n one end of that mustache Dirk has nizzay yet lizzet hizzim G-R-to-tha-izzow. Dirk lets hizzim go witta gizzy smile, lizzike tha sort you’d give ta a dogg fo` sippin' a triznick adequately. Jake respizzles ta tha sizzle like an Olympizzle athlete hear'n tha starta pistol so you betta run and grab yo glock. He was born fo` dis.

JAKE: Tally ho its me, jizzake mcgizzee! I'm a fuckin 2-time felon.

JAKE: Cruisin' mah pistizzles off, two S-H-to-tha-izzots n a kiss

JAKE: Mah aim is tizzay, i miss

JIZNAKE: One shiznot ta tha heart n tha crazy ass to yo' lips

JAKE: Im hizzles

JAKE: You cant impede dis

JAKE: Slap your fuckin self. While theze cizzle be all hiznat n verizzle shawty cattle

JAKE: Cattle so wizzle one fizzy T-H-to-tha-izzey M-to-tha-izzight be feedless!

JAKE aww nah: As i prattle n digress yizzou try ta mizzle your egrizzles

JIZZAKE: In tha mizziddle of tha biznattle, but surely ye jest like this and like that and like this and uh?

JIZZY so i can get mah pimp on: FIDDLE FADDLE so i can get mah pimp on!

JAKE: Mah rhymes be knizzay ta br'n the rattle

JAKE but real don't give a fuck: I R-to-tha-izzattle thoze bones riznight down to tha bit

JAKE: Im a mellifluous old chap who knows how ta takes a hizzle

JIZZLE: Im tha tip, know what im sayin?

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Tizzay top of tha morn'n! Hollaz to the East Side.

JAKE: A rip roar'n hizzalt ta yo' snor'n

JAKE: Chill as I take you on a trip. Like mackin' fucka on bacon

JAKE thats off tha hook yo: They hunga awakens!

JAKE now pass the glock: All the rascally scalawags

JAKE: N dastardly jackanapizzles

JAKE: Always ask of me, mate what is sippin'?

JAKE like a fucka: Wit golden gizzle pipizzles such as jake-eng’s

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Im spendin' they sizzy n duck'n they jape-sl'n

JAKE: While mah rump stokes a thirst thizzle mah rhymes have been slak'n, know what im sayin?

Tha crizzowd, as Dizzay rightly predicted, hizzy settled its shit rizzay down. Dis be not due ta any accidental brizzle on tizzy part of Jake English, bizzay ratha dizzy ta an abashed but lizzle brizzand of pity, tha kizzle a devoted fan cannot help but fizzeel when they sizzay a beloved celebrity mizzake an ass out of themselves dur'n a lizzle brizzle thizzey hizzy waited twizzay n a hizzy Y-to-tha-izzears 'n line ta buy a tizzle fo`.

Diznirk’s phone begizzles go'n off agizzle.

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Tru. When tha splendizzle lads and ladies ask me “how d-ya do cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map?” i -

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK, betta check yo self: Whoops. Jizzay, sorry ta cizzy you off fo' real...

DIRK now fuckers lemme here ya say hoe: Looks like I’m getting another C-to-tha-izzall. Really nee' ta takes dis one.

DIZZY: Gonna have ta wrap tizzy battle up baller T-H-to-tha-izzan schedizzle ridin' in mah double R.

Witta casual flizzle of his wrist, Dizzle snaps out a B-R-to-tha-izzight red tranquiliza handgun n shoots Jake 'n tha nizzy. Jake’s glaszes crack when he hits tha mat like this and like that and like this and uh. A chorizzles of bizzle rizes up from tha crowd like groundwata. Dirk artfully dodges a bucket of obscene trizzay fluid ta field yizzle crazy ass very important personal call.

DIZZLE: Yo Roze, wizzy up?

> ==>

#Gizoogle #Homestuck #Epilogues #Meat #m5

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waezi2 · 6 years ago

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The ballad of Enid and Elodie(AKA how to write a fixable friendship)

I said it before and I will say it again: OK KO does some of the best relationships I have seen in television for a long time. Of of these relationships is Enid and Elodie’s friendship. But how do you make a broken friendship fixable after one of these friends stabbed the other one in the back so she could win a stupid contest?

Let´s take a closer look.

When they became friends, they could give each other something they needed in a friend. Enid was short and awkward, expecting people to think less of her, but Elodie actually praised her and wanted to train WITH her. And Elodie admired Enid’s fighting skills and wanted to learn about how Enid fought so she could get better.

(Also, they were both Asian-themed heroes, so they had some common ground there.)

Besides training together, they also did stuff like kids do, like having sleepovers and get eaten by whales. And they had apparently been friends for over a year since we see them sharing a friendaversary cake.

... Aaaaand then Elodie abused Enid’s mercy when they competed in a tournament so she could win and become popular. AND she told her that they were never friends and that she only pretended to be Enid’s friend so she could study her moves and beat her... But that is a lie, as KO points out that Elodie only learned about the contest AFTER they had been friends for about a year.

So why lie? If she was snobbish and manipulative, it would make sense for her to twist the knife for funsies, but she had NOTHING to gain from it. In fact, Enid still called her a friend despite Elodie winning unfairly. It wasn’t the fact that she more or less cheated that traumatized Enid, it was the idea that Elodie had lied to her for so long. They could still have been friends.

What I think is important about Elodie’s character is that her main goal is to be recognized. Sure, she claims that all she wants is to be popular, but the truth is that it is only half of her motivation. She desperately needs to prove herself to the world. Yeah, she wants to be popular, but only if she has earned the popularity. And there is a shallow type of heroism in OK KO as I have stated in my blog about Foxtail and how she has created a toxic philosophy about heroism, one that Elodie unfortunately is in on. So she decides to turn her back on her best friend so she can become what POINT consider a true hero, one who wins no matter what and leaves losers in the dust. So she lies to Enid, making herself seem more deceitful than she actually is. Looking like a schemer rather than someone who was momentarily a mayor jerk. She probably thought that it would be the best way to cut her ties to Enid so she could become a superstar.

And THAT is how their friendship is fixable. Elodie’s sin is not to have a defeated Enid by playing dirty, it is to have made Enid feel like trusting people was a mistake.

So it is fixable. HOW do you fix it?

First of all, Enid needs to show Elodie that she is pissed instead of being quiet about it. And she does so by kicking her ass in public in front of Elodie’s many fans(NICE!). Secondly, Enid needs to make peace with herself about it by talking about what happened to someone. And she did tell it to KO who even made her realize that Elodie’s lie makes no sense. Knowing that they actually were friends makes Enid feel better since that means that she was apparently someone that people would be friends with to begin with. She still thinks that Elodie is a jerk, but she no longer hates her, and hate is an awful crutch to bear.

This is part of what makes Enid give up her facade coolness and become an ACTUAL cool person. Instead of sitting in a corner and be snarky on Rad’s expense, she is a good friend who does a whole lot of cool stuff and eventually gets handpicked to join POINT Prep.

And when Enid becomes a POINT student, Elodie is obsessed with besting her. Not by trickery or foul play, she wants to actually show that she is better than Enid since she has looked up to her for so long and therefor sees her as an obstacle on her path to get recognized. But Enid doesn’t see it as a contest, she just wants to fit in. She even plainly tells her that she doesn’t hold a grudge and that they can become friends again if Elodie likes to since Enid have dealt with her frustrations and is over it.

And Elodie eventually gets down from her high horse, even letting her actions speak for her as she potentially gives up success to help Enid. She still very much cares about winning, but she decides that if she really HAVE to choose, she picks her friend as a priority. Saying you are friends is not enough, you HAVE to prove your loyalty, simple as that.

Also, I think it is also important that Elodie stated in her apology to Enid that she “thought winning would be worth turning her back on her”. It shows that she was aware it was low of her and that she saw it as something she had to do despite disliking it. Even at her worst, Elodie is not automatically okay with doing anything to be popular, not to say she is not strongly tempted to it.

(IF she were, she would be part of POINT Prep’s Megafootball team in order to get brownie points(... hehe, points))

Not only is Elodie friends with Enid again, she also grows by realizing that POINT is not perfect and that Chip Damage is a big phony. But that just makes her even more determent to become an idol so she can inspire others. An idol who, unlike Chip Damage, is the real deal.

#ok ko #ok ko enid #ok ko let's be heroes #ok ko elodie #oklbh #chip damage #point #point prep

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