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ckret2 · 4 months ago

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Chapter 64 of human Bill Cipher being 50% the prisoner & 50% the weird guest of the Mystery Shack:

Soos makes a deeply significant moral decision. To redecorate!

If you're seeing this picture, it's because I either didn't have enough time to draw a better one before the queue spat out this chapter, or I decided that nothing else I could draw would be half as funny.

####

Whenever Soos faced something difficult, he talked to Abuelita. And Bill was nothing if not something difficult.

Soos laid out the situation to her in the living room as she watched her telenovelas—she didn't mind the distraction, she far preferred real life drama over anything they put on TV. He told her about the confiscated canes, the daily injuries, the bargaining for food, the threat of forced showers, the bruises and burns and blood Bill said nothing about. He told her about Bill's door trick and how he'd only used it to talk to a teen about life and tuck a kid into bed. Once he'd told Abuelita all his thoughts, she nodded slowly, eyes still fixed to the TV screen; and for the moment, said nothing.

The doctor on TV confirmed the tearful new mother's suspicions that her husband had cheated (DNA tests confirmed the baby was another woman's), and Abuelita muted the show as it went to a commercial break. Soos waited as she collected her thoughts to render her judgment.

"I have been talking to Mr. Cipher for the last month or so. He keeps me company while I cook so I do not poison him again," she said. "I think he is ruthless, manipulative, and self-centered."

Soos winced, but nodded. "That's true."

Abuelita went on, "I like him. He is self-confident. He's blunt in a way you only get when you're old and cynical. I think he is a bad person; but, many bad people are good company."

"That's also true." Soos nodded again thoughtfully. Like whenever a comic book had a young idealistic superhero team up with an old jaded ex-villain who played by his own rules, and they ended up best friends, in spite of their glaring ethical and political differences.

"But, more importantly than whether he is a good person or a bad person," Abuelita said, "he is a person. And if you do not like a person, there are three ways you can deal with him." She counted off on her fingers, "You can kill him; you can avoid him; or you can set your feelings aside, and treat him with decency. Yes, get rid of the people who are bad for you—but no matter how terrible a person is, you must treat him like a person."

Soos's eyes lit up. "Oh, like with grandpa!"

Abuelita nodded slowly. "Yes. Just like grandpa."

"Yeah but—what if treating him decently is, you know... dangerous? Like if he uses any privileges we give him to do bad stuff? The Pines think he will. And I think he might be secretly talking to his cultists or whatever? Who miiight wanna destroy the world? But what if they can't destroy the world actually, and if I tell about the people he's talking to, he gets treated even worse..."

"Without his devil powers, he couldn't destroy a bookclub," Abuelita said. "But, if he is so dangerous, are you going to kill him?"

"No. I actually don't think we can anymore?"

"Are you going to avoid him?"

Soos let out a heavy sigh. "I can't as long as he lives here."

Abuelita shrugged, as if to say there you have it. "You are a good, kind man, mijo. I am sure you will figure out the right thing to do."

####

He took Melody out for lunch. They went through a drive-thru so they could park and talk privately in the truck.

She took a firmer stance on it than Abuelita. "I do not want to be stuck with Bill forever," she said. "I could put up with it this long because I thought the Pines would get rid of him as soon as possible! Now that he's staying here indefinitely...?" She shook her head. "I really don't like it, Soos."

Soos wasn't surprised. "Do... you think they should have 'gotten rid' of him?"

Melody paused, then shook her head again. "This whole thing is such a bizarre situation. Like, I can get why it makes sense to execute the guy that can end the world, but... I just don't think that's a decision two random guys with a big gun should be allowed to make," she said. "Honestly? I think we should call some federal agency and put him in jail somewhere. You know I've been iffy on Ford's 'only we can contain Bill' thing from the start."

"Yeah. I know." Soos agreed with Ford—he was the Bill expert, he would know—but he couldn't say Melody was wrong, either.

"Our wedding's scheduled for the end of summer," Melody said. "And... I'm sorry, Soos, but I just can't live under the same roof as the guy that turned me into a statue. We'll still get married—"

"—Oh, phew, almost had a heart attack there—"

"—pff, sorry. But if Bill's still in the shack after the summer, then... then I'll keep staying with my aunt, or we could move into your old house and just visit the shack for work, or something... but I can't move into the shack permanently until he moves out."

"Okay. I accept that." Even if the rest of them had sorta gotten used to living with Bill, Soos thought not wanting to live with a former torturer/conqueror/dictator was a pretty reasonable boundary. "I dunno what we'll do long-term just yet, but—we'll decide on something before the wedding."

Melody let out a long, nervous sigh. "Okay," she said. "Okay. Thanks, Soos." She reached across the truck's center console.

Soos took her hand. "But, how do you think we should handle Bill until then?"

Melody stared out the window at the gray sky. The rain had dried up before dawn, but the sky was still hazy. "If we keep guarding him ourselves instead of getting law enforcement involved... personally? I wouldn't give him any kind of special treatment at all. He tried to end the world! He stuck the whole town in a throne! He can just keep sleeping on the floor and being miserable, and I'd be fine with it."

Soos winced. "I see."

Melody squeezed his hand. "But—the fact that you're kinder than that is one of the things I love about you. Even when the creep you're being kind to doesn't deserve it." She gave him a resigned smile. "Do whatever you feel is right."

He considered that. Then he nodded. "I will."

####

Bill kept Soos's Abuelita company while she cooked, and gossiped with her in Spanish better than Soos's about people Bill had never even met. Bill liked watching cartoons, sports where people got hurt, and weirdly intellectual movies Soos didn't get, and he heckled historical documentaries and the news. Bill was offended by white rice and had incredibly strong opinions about salsas for a guy who'd only started eating them a month ago. Bill hadn't taken his friendship bracelet off once since Mabel gave it to him. Bill might not have been a human; but he was a person.

It was high time they start treating him like one.

####

Soos came home late in the afternoon with his truck laden down with supplies. Stan's car was gone, and when Soos came in with an armload of wooden boards he didn't see anybody around except Abuelita, napping in the living room, and Dipper, laying on the living room floor watching TV. "Hey dude," Soos whispered. "Where's everybody else?"

Dipper whispered back, "Hey Soos. Stan and Ford are at McGucket's mansion." He didn't look up from the TV. He was watching a rerun of Ghost Harassers on mute. "Mabel's with Bill in the floor room. He's in a bad mood about something so they've been doing karaoke all day."

"Huh." Soos could faintly hear someone playing his electric piano. It sounded like it was on the organ setting. "I didn't know he plays piano."

"He's alright," Dipper said. "His singing's terrible, though."

Soos shuddered. He could imagine.

Well, at least it meant Bill was out of the way. Soos began his first of many trips upstairs.

####

"What's all this racket?" Stan trudged upstairs to inspect Soos's noises—and abruptly stopped at the top of the stairs as he almost ran into a wooden beam. "What the—?"

"Oh, hey Mr. Pines!" Soos hooked his hammer on his tool belt. He'd put up wall framing to section off the corner of the attic floor that included the window seat.

Stan circled around the framing, inspecting it in bafflement. "Soos, what the heck is this?"

"So, remember at the beginning of summer, when I said that me and Melody were thinking about putting in a gaming room-slash-guest room in the attic? And Ford said not to bother until Bill was gone because he wouldn't be here long enough for me to finish? Welp! Sounds like he's gonna be here long enough for me to finish now! So I thought, hey, might as well, right? No reason not to!" He shrugged. "By the way, do you think I should put the door in front of the stairs, or on the long side of the room opposite the window? If it's in front of the stairs, you can just walk right in the room when you come up, and we'd be able to put a big screen on the long wall; but when you're walking out of the room it'd be really easy to forget the stairs are there and fall, and uh, we already have enough of a problem with that—"

Stan finally got his dropped jaw working again. "But this is where the demon sleeps! Where are we supposed to put him now?!"

"Oh, it's fine! Bill can keep sleeping in here. I'll put up a curtain instead of a door for now. This way the room's ready for gaming once Bill's gone." Soos planted his hands on his hips and surveyed his handiwork with pride.

"Are you crazy? You're giving Bill his own room?! No way! He could do anything in private. We can't trust him with that—"

"Listen." Soos gave Stan a serious look. "Mr. Pines, I respect you, and I love you like the dad I never had except technically I do have a dad but he's off being a deadbeat in Florida or something so he doesn't count."

He pointed at the floor. "But this is my house now. My name might not be on the deed, but my butt is in the master bedroom! And nobody under my roof is living like—like—like some kind of starving hobo sleeping on a bench under a newspaper, you know what I'm talking about? The Mystery Shack is a happy place! Where people come to see dreams come true and have their imaginations expanded! And I won't see it turned into some sad one-man prison!"

Stan stared at Soos, speechless.

"So." Soos took a deep breath. "With all due respect—I'm building a gaming room, and it'll have walls, and Bill gets to sleep in it. Because he's a person! And we're gonna treat him like one!"

Stan slowly looked from Soos to the wall framing, to the boxes of supplies he'd bought for the room and pushed against a wall to wait—to the pathetic couch cushion bed still sitting on the floor in front of the window. "All right. That's—that's fine. I'll let Ford know."

Soos's shoulders relaxed. "Thanks, Mr. Pines."

Stan clapped a hand on Soos's shoulder; looked for a moment like he wanted to say something; then just shook his head and said instead, "Knock off the hammering before the kids go to bed, all right?"

"No problem! I've gotta set up some furniture and stuff in here anyway." He got back to work as Stan went downstairs.

####

Soos paused his work when he overheard Bill's voice: "Hey Stanford. Figured out the kitchen situation yet?"

Soos had to strain to hear Ford (jeez, Bill was loud) as he said, "We haven't had a chance yet. For now, we can at least leave one of the counter cabinets open."

"Huh." It didn't sound like an impressed huh. "And will this open cabinet have any of the foods you put in the cabinet to hide from me? Or just more of the junk I've already been scavenging."

Ford was silent long enough to provide the answer.

"Right."

"I went by the grocery store," Ford offered. "I got avocados."

"Uh huh."

"And several pepper varieties."

"Ooh." Bill sounded intrigued in spite of himself.

"And protein drinks. They're nutritious, at least," Ford said. "But—I know that's not adequate. Stan and I will have something permanent figured out by the end of the week."

"I guess it's fine as an emergency measure," Bill said, "but you know how the phrase goes! Give a triangle a protein drink, and it'll eat for a day. Teach a triangle to open the fridge, and it'll eat for the rest of its life. If you lift that curse..."

"We'll talk. But don't get your hopes up. Neither of us likes the thought of giving you the power to come in our bedroom and smother us in our sleep the next time we have an argument."

"Fine." Bill's voice had hardened again. "You've got to the end of the week. But don't forget! If I don't like your offer, I don't have to take it! You can't keep me in this rickety barn anymore."

"I haven't forgotten."

The conversation seemed to be over and Soos didn't hear anyone coming up the stairs. He got back to work.

He felt good. He was doing the right thing.

####

When Mabel came up to bed, she stared in confusion at the modified attic floor, squealed in excitement when she realized what she was looking at, surprised Soos with a hug, and gushed about how great it was; and then she let Soos know Dipper and Ford were out tonight investigating weird stuff and went on to bed herself.

The first notification Soos had that Bill had come upstairs was a flat, offended, "What."

"Oh, hey!" Soos ducked out of the opening he'd left for the doorway—which he'd ultimately decided to put straight across from the window, to let a little light back into the attic. (He'd have to add more lighting in the main attic now that the window was blocked off.) Bill was standing at the corner of the new room, surveying the work with an expression of deep suspicion.

Soos said, "I was just getting started on this gaming room Melody and me wanted to put in—it's okay though, you can keep using it, we'll just turn it into a gaming room, uhhh... lllater. Whenever, it's cool!"

Bill turned his suspicious look on Soos; but when Soos gestured for Bill to follow him into the room, he reluctantly followed.

"Yeah, I got up the framing," Soos said, "but I couldn't get to the drywall today, so I just stapled up some tarps to be walls for now. But, look!" He gestured grandly. "I brought up the old orange sofa and chaise thingy that used to be in Abuelita's room! They've been in storage for like a year. I bet we could sit, like, six people on it for game nights. It turns out the sofa's a daybed, so we can use it as an extra guest bed for visitors, we do not have enough beds for visitors in the shack, haha. And, check it—" Soos flipped up the lid on a chest he'd placed in front of the right end of the sofa like a footrest. "I put in one of those top-down chest fridges for gaming snacks! It uh, the top of it swings up, that makes it a lid instead of a door, right? Sooo I guess you can use it too, right? You can just, put whatever you want on the weekly grocery list, and we'll put it in here. Oh, and!" He pointed at the ancient TV console table he'd hauled up from the cellar, "I set up a hot plate here, too! So you can cook stuff in the attic! For—for normal legitimate gaming room purposes."

Bill's gaze followed where Soos pointed, from the ancient orange sofa to the fridge chest to the hot plate. He didn't say anything. His expression was completely unreadable.

Soos swallowed. "Oh, and, by the way, speaking of home improvements, I took out the doorknob on the main bathroom, and put in one of those, like, little slidy dealies like public bathroom stalls? Plus I gave the door those swinging hinges—like the kind on saloon doors in the movies, o-or, say, the door into the gift shop—"

Bill whipped around to face Soos.

Soos jumped. He laughed nervously and tried to remember what point he was making. "S-so, um... there's no latch now, so it doesn't latch, which means there's no way to accidentally get locked in—or out, of the bathroom, and... and I don't actually know how much of that you understood, due to the whole curse thing? Just forget everything I just said, I guess, the important thing is you can use that bathroom without asking someone else now! Cool, right?"

He had to turn away from Bill's intense gaze, pointing back at the gaming room's doorway. "Anyway since the room isn't finished yet and you're probably gonna use it for a while, I hung up a curtain instead of a door. And I added that cool zodiac spell blanket thing Mabel gave me inside the curtain! Since you said you liked it so much when you first got here. And like... having it in our room kinda creeps Melody out, I think it might be giving her nightmares? So I thought you might like it better. Anyway I've still gotta do some other stuff, like add power outlets in here, and air conditioning, and... a-and..." He petered out weakly.

Bill was giving Soos the most venomous look he'd ever seen.

"Sure. Terrific." Bill crossed his arms, seething. "I've slept on the floor, I can cope with sleeping in the middle of a construction zone too. No big deal! I'll make do."

"Oh," Soos said. "Uh... if it bothers you, I could try to get the walls finished tomorrow? Shack's closed tomorrow too, so, I was already planning to keep—"

Teeth grit, Bill snarled, "Don't put yourself out on my behalf."

Soos froze. "Oookay! Uh... well, I'll be getting ready for bed if you need... yeah, no, you—you probably don't need anything. Bye." He ducked out into the attic, letting out a whoosh of a sigh as soon as the curtain swung shut behind him.

Bill had looked like he was two seconds from ripping out Soos's throat. Why? Had he liked sleeping on the floor? He'd never seemed like he had. Maybe he'd preferred the attic's open flooring? Maybe he hated extremely 70's orange upholstery? Was this a mistake...?

Bill watched through the tarp until Soos was down the stairs. Then he lunged over the sofa, hanging over the back by his waist, to reach the attic window seat. He groped for the corner of the seat cushion where he'd hidden Journal 4.

He sighed in relief when he felt the familiar rectangular block in the cushion. He pulled it free: there was Journal 4, along with his two stubby crayons. As well as two marker pens, black and red, with a sticky note wrapped around them that said, "Thought these might be useful, dude!"

Bill's hands trembled with fury.

####

Soos was brushing his teeth when someone pounded on the bathroom door, making him drop his brush. The door swung open a couple of inches; Soos heard Bill mutter a confused, "What?" before it swung shut again.

Soos opened the door. "Bill? What's..."

Bill's face was completely flushed. It was hauntingly reminiscent of the look he'd had last year right before trying to murder Soos and the kids in Stan's mind. His rage had shot past "apoplectic" and landed on "apocalyptic." Soos understood how Pompeii had felt when the rumbling began. He took a few steps back.

Bill stalked into the bathroom.

He slapped the red pen down on the counter.

And, avoiding eye contact, he muttered, "Fine-tip yellow highlighter would be better. If you've got it."

"Oh," Soos said. "Sure, I... I think I have some skinny highlighters in my office. Just... lemme finish brushing my teeth."

####

Bill leaned in the office doorway, arms crossed tight, waiting. As Soos rummaged through his desk supplies, back to the door, he got the uneasy feeling that maybe Bill had lured him here to stab him in the back or something. He seemed mad enough. And the office was narrow; if Bill came up right behind him, there'd be nowhere for Soos to dodge...

When he found a new highlighter and turned around, Bill was glowering inches behind him.

Soos jumped. "Dude! You freaked me out."

Bill didn't condescend to respond. He just snatched the highlighter out of Soos's hand and stormed from the room. A moment later, Soos could hear him stomping up the stairs (and stumbling on one step. Soos really needed to figure out how to make the stairs more safe).

For the life of him, Soos didn't know how he'd offended Bill.

####

The contraband supplies Bill had hidden behind a loose board in the wall still appeared to be undisturbed. He could only hope Soos hadn't found them during his snooping. For tonight, he could hide Journal 4 there; tomorrow he'd have to find a new, more secure hiding spot that kept it close enough to where Bill slept.

He turned around the hanging zodiac blanket and curtain so Bill's watchful triangular face was guarding the new attic hallway rather than staring into the room.

He surveyed his atrocious new sofa. If he'd known he would be plagued with this thing in the future, he would have found a way to make Ford get rid of it thirty years ago. Would Ford have thrown it out if his blessed Muse had told him it looked hideous? Maybe, but that would've put a ding in Bill's benevolent image. He could've said the sofa would lead Ford to doom? No, too implausible. Ford had always wanted a nice set of leather furniture; maybe if Bill had claimed the cost of leather furniture was about to skyrocket, and if Ford ever wanted to build his dream sophisticated gentleman's den then he should buy as soon as possible—maybe sell his current sofa to recoup costs and free up space... Yeah, Ford would've eaten that up, he'd have been so grateful Bill was thoughtful enough to care about his silly little life dreams and look out for his financial future. He shoulda done that. Hindsight.

So. What did he have here? A daybed; personal fridge; mini-stove; walls (tarp); two pillows; throw blanket; two markers; a lamp (unplugged); a clock radio (unplugged); a low console table with two shelves, onto which Soos had emptied the contents of Bill's cardboard box of clothes; and an implicit promise to keep a pile of secrets.

How humiliating.

He considered sleeping on the bare floor in protest; but, his back still hurt. Once again, subject to the tyranny of an organic body. He sighed, pulled his bedsheet from the console table, and curled up on the sofa.

The moment he lay down, a scent soaked into the seat cushion made his heart leap into his throat. He was sure he could smell home. Familiar and comforting and right—and for a moment the evidence of his other six senses didn't matter: he had his power back, he was in his kingdom, and all was right with the world. It took a moment to figure out what about the scent had so strongly disoriented him: he was smelling the atmosphere of the Nightmare Realm.

And then took another moment to work out that it wasn't really the Nightmare Realm, but a very similar scent—sulfurous, organic, burning. Burnt hair.

The cushion still smelled like Ford.

Bill groaned in frustration, rolled off the sofa, and flopped to the floor.

After permitting himself a moment of rage at the injustices of the multiverse, Bill crawled up onto the chaise lounge on the left end of the sofa, avoiding the part of the sofa where Ford used to sleep.

The chaise was smaller than his floor cushion bed used to be; but he'd make do.

####

(I know we're all busy going insane over the website but i'd love a comment when y'all read this chapter lol)

#bill cipher #human bill cipher #soos ramirez #gravity falls #gravity falls fic #gravity falls fanart #fanart #my art #my writing #bill goldilocks cipher #(so how we feeling today on thisisnotawebsitedotcom day? good? everyone feeling good? we all having fun?)

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steddieas-shegoes · 4 months ago

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documentary

for @corrodedcoffinfest prompt 'behind the music'

rated m | 723 words | cw: implied sexual content | tags: modern era, famous corroded coffin, established steddie

📹📹📹📹📹📹📹📹📹📹

"Steve!" Gareth calls from the couch of the living room, not caring that Eddie was fast asleep in his chair. "It's on!"

Steve rushes into the room, nearly falling face first when he slips on the corner of the rug. He's wiping his hands on a towel, probably wet from doing the dishes after dinner.

Jeff and Frankie are sitting on the other couch, leaning forward to watch.

Eddie's still asleep somehow.

"Metal bands have always been expected to just make due with whatever already exists in the metal community. 'Don't play acoustic' and 'You can't play Coachella' and 'You can't feature a pop star.' But we just like music. We wanna share music with people."

"Listen to you, Jeff. So poetic," Frankie teases. Jeff shoves him, but they keep watching the ad for their documentary.

"We live in a time where people don't have to just like one thing. Someone can have a playlist that's got us right next to Dolly Parton and Taylor Swift if they want. If people saw my playlists, they'd think a group of teenagers made it."

Eddie doesn't even wake up when his voice fills the room, his face on the screen.

"Corroded Coffin announces world tour with a new opening guest for every show. The artists range anywhere from Chappell Roan to Sleep Token." A male reporter is shown on the screen.

"No one's doing it like them, that's why we love them," a few fans say into a camera during an interview.

"The members of Corroded Coffin refused to do a documentary for years, too busy writing, recording, and performing music for the masses. But they've taken time off this year, focusing on personal time with loved ones and staying out of the limelight they worked so hard to reach. We finally managed to sit down with them and find out who they are...behind the music."

The ad changes to a fast food commercial and Steve laughs.

"That was somehow more dramatic than anything Eddie's ever done," he says as he walks over to wake up his still sleeping boyfriend. "Ed, you missed it."

Eddie's eyes blink open, but he doesn't seem to remember that he fell asleep with everyone in the room. He grabs Steve's thighs and pulls him down so he's straddling his waist.

"Hey, big boy. Was just dreamin' about you."

Steve laughs. "You can tell me all about it later. When your best friends are not sitting a few feet away."

Eddie turns his head, but doesn't take his hands off of Steve's hips. "You should all go. I have business to attend to."

"You missed the ad, dumbass," Gareth says, throwing one of the pillows at Eddie. "Keep your hands to yourself until the next run."

"Don't you think it's already on social media?" Frankie asked before Eddie could.

"Probably, but it's different on tv."

Eddie squeezes Steve's hips, but lets him get up. He sits up and smiles up at Steve. "Later?"

"If you can stay awake, sure."

Steve leaves the room and Jeff, Frankie, and Gareth all start teasing Eddie immediately. He lets them; He knows he's a lovesick idiot.

When the next ad comes on as scheduled, Eddie watches it silently.

He pulls his phone out and calls Wayne, asking if he saw it.

And then he starts crying.

Everyone's in complete shock.

"Steve! Eddie's crying!" Gareth yells.

This time when Steve comes rushing into the room, it's with panic in his eyes. He seems to realize what's going on the moment he sees Eddie, though. He shoos everyone out of the room as he makes his way to him, kneeling in front of him and placing his hands on his face.

The guys don't hear much, but they can make out Eddie blubbering "we worked so hard for this and it's happening" and Steve's gentle shushing and praise.

"Should we get pizza delivered?" Frankie asks.

"I think now's a good time to just leave," Jeff suggests. "We can get hibachi."

"Hell yeah!" Frankie fist pumps and opens the front door, holding it open as Jeff walks through it.

Gareth looks back towards where Steve has Eddie's head against his shoulder, hand in his hair. He smiles to himself as he leaves to join Jeff and Frankie.

They really did work their asses off to get here.

#corroded coffin #corrodedcoffinfest #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #gareth stranger things #jeff stranger things #unnamed freak stranger things #stranger things

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pickingupmymercedes · 5 months ago

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Lewis Masterlist

Series

It comes with the territory p.1 / p.2 / p.3

“This… this is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But no love is worth losing my sanity over. Not even ours.”

An Invisible String Theory Story p.1 / p.2 / p.3

"I’ve always felt that string pulling me closer to something. But never, not even in my most beautiful dreams, had I imagined that it was to bind us together."

It was bound to come out p.1 / p.2

"Do I look like I'm joking? This is not a joke! My father has seen a video of us... the one video that couldn’t leave my phone!"

Not just a pretty face p.1 / p.2 / p.3 / bonus

"because even this… even this agonizing dance is better than not having you at all."

Maybe in another life - p.1 / p.2 / p.3

"A what-if that will forever linger in the quiet corners of my mind."

She’s here and she’s ours - p.1 / p.2 / p.3 / p.4 / p.5 / p.6 / p.7 / p.8

You couldn’t really tell if he was telling you or himself that. "How you feeling dad?" "Amazed, hopeful, scared... in love"

Get me out of here p.1 / p.2

“Why are you defending him?” “Because we need to think this through, babe. Toto’s not one of us anymore, you saw it.”

Your future was Ferrari - p.1 / p.2

Surely, it meant nothing for Lewis and you would probably never see him again. Your future was at Ferrari, somewhere he would never step foot in. Or would he?!

Multichapters

Ways to say “I love you” p.1 / p.2 / p.3(NSFW)

All these little things p.1 / p.2

Small firsts p.1

Firsts - NSFW p.1 / p.2

Ways they show they love each other p.1 / p.2

One-Shots

Angst

It had to be enough - "I’m so fucking tired of fighting, of trying to prove that I still belong here." "I can’t keep watching you tear yourself apart like this. It’s killing me, Lewis."

Home is wherever you are - "You shouldn't have come" "Had to"

An impossible dream - "Don't you ever wonder what could have been?"

I didn't get scared. I'm always scared - “Do you even understand what it’s like for me? To love someone who lives every day like it might be their last?”

Not now, not ever - "You don't have to go through this alone, you know"

I'll come find you - “I’m scared… of how things have been, of how things are going to be.”

If these wings could fly - “I don’t think I’ve ever felt anything like Sunday. It’s been so long and everyone’s worked so hard for that”

And just like the sun, we will rise - “I can’t promise to have all the answers, but please let me in”

Fluffs

What it means - “Since I was five, since I first saw Ayrton race on TV. He was my absolute hero, and I didn’t know much about the world back then, didn’t know what I could be, but seeing him… it made me believe.

Lucky you're hot - The kind of kiss that would’ve been cute—if it weren’t for the fact that I was very much on camera, in a professional setting, with a dozen or so people watching.

A smile like that -"And he’s out there, posting photos like it’s some romantic movie."

A bit mushy - How Lewis and his wife do in a couple's Interview.

Happy you're home - "And trust me, he adores you. He just doesn't know how to express it."

Later it is - “But that safety pin right there is holding on for dear life.” “I only care about what you think.” “Flatterer.”

Of thorns and blooms - "It's meant to be worn by someone who sees the world differently, who tells stories with every thread"

He always rises - "Like I knew I'd given it my all, every lap, every strategy meeting. And finally, finally, it’s paying off. It feels… good. It feels so damn good."

R for Roscoe, C for Coco - "You went through all this trouble just for Father's Day with Roscoe?"

Boy from Stevenage - "you don't need to win over that entire room tonight. You just need to make that brave boy from Stevenage proud."

Whispered fairytale - "The point is in the surprise. The joy of meeting them, whoever they are, for the very first time."

A thousand times over - "Since I still don’t believe it’s true… would you marry me, again?"

It sounds silly - "I'm a grown woman who’s achieved success in life, yet… I find myself comparing to those other women."

NSFW (+18 only)

Can't check out -“Where’s the cutthroat guy who would have had me pinned to the wall by now?"

Utterly gone -“But for the record, I also owe you.”

Very First -“I want this. I want you. And I’m not saying that lightly.”

Salty -"Told you” she whispered, her thumb brushing against his bottom lip. "It’s salty."

Damn him -“I believe you’ve got two things that are mine” “My hair tie you took with you this morning. And you babe, you're mine.”

Give yourself some credit - “I’m gonna give you five minutes to mourn that shit qualy” “You think you can handle me, pretty girl?”

What those arms can do - "Let's focus on you for now, love. And what these arms can do to you."

Warm enough - "Did you know there were no doors in this place?" "I might have known. Thought it could be romantic"

It's not just a win - The 104 special - "I just...I needed this. I needed to win. To prove to myself that I still can."

Improvised Compensation - "My plans definitely involve you" he continued, "but they can be done anywhere"

As good as chocolate - "That's a new way to claim your share"

I'm yours, only yours - Vegas special - “You really thought she was any match for you?”

It always points South - “Your compass tattoo, huh?”

My Venus - MET special - "I can actually feel your eyes searing holes in my dress, Lewis."

I want South - "Hello, miss explorer”

You only need to ask - "Seems like someone's forgotten how we got here in the first place"

It's Mrs. Hamilton - “Mark me, show me who I belong to”

The things we do for fashion - "Like what you see?" "More than you'll ever know."

Show me you care - “I’m asking you to, show me how much you want this, because I know you do”

My mark - “I’m not one to leave things unfinished”

NSFW alphabet

Senna!Reader x Lewis Hamilton

Thank you for everything - "It doesn't matter how long it's been" "Grief doesn't have a deadline."

Under an Ipê tree - “He would’ve liked you I think… would’ve hated to race you, for sure."

Drabbles

Do not under any circumstance plagarize, edit, repurpose, or repost any of my original work. this includes all of my works.

#f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 scenario #f1 x reader #lewis hamilton #lh #lh44 #lewis #lewis x reader #lewis imagine #lewis hamilton smut #lewis hamilton fanfic #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton one shot #lewis hamilton imagine #lh44 x reader #lh44 imagine #lewis hamilton x you

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byechristopher · 2 months ago

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fuck'em all, but us.

– CHRIS STURNIOLO ANGST.

Author's note: Hello, little angels. I have been gone for months, but I've been wanting to write something for a while now. Excuse me for the hiatus. However, I still can not promise that I'll be consistent from now on – but i love you still. Do not copy/steal my work. :)

Warnings: HELLA LONG. This is almost 3.000 words, sweet Jesus. As usual, if you know me, I like writing about dark, angsty shit. Nothing too bad, but you know, mention of fights, blood, smoking, etc.

I caught Chris staring at me again, that same cold, unreadable expression on his face. He had a cigarette between his fingers, as usual. His eyes were like ice, and whenever they landed on me, I felt a chill run down my spine. He never says anything — just watches, arms crossed, jaw clenched, as if I’ve done something to offend him without even knowing it. I don’t understand what I did to make him look at me that way, like he’s barely holding back some hidden resentment. And yet, every time I catch him watching, I can’t help but wonder what he’s really thinking.

I’ve seen him with a few other people. He’s not exactly warm with them either, but there’s something different when he talks to them, a sort of casual ease. With me, it’s like he’s built up walls — high, thick ones, and I’m just standing outside, banging on the gates. And every now and then, I think I catch a glimpse of something behind them, something vulnerable and unexpected, but it’s gone before I can be sure.

Chris was my older brother's closest friend, and he has been ever since they were little kids. No one ever got as close to him as my brother did. Whereas when it came to me, he was rather cold; I never understood why.

My thoughts were roughly interrupted by my brother's hand, which took a strand of my hair and pulled on it to annoy me.

"Ow, you fucking asshole!"

"Hey, wake the fuck up. I said me and Chris are leaving." I rolled my eyes and looked at Chris one more time, seeing that he still had that same look on his face.

Deciding to ignore it one more time, "yeah, bye. God." I said and grabbed the remote to switch on the TV.

I didn’t want to watch anything in particular; I’d just rather avoid looking at my brother’s best friend once again.

"Where the hell are you?"

A notification popped up and before I read the sender's name, I already knew it was Fred. My ex.

Of course, I ignored it, but deep down, I knew he was losing it. Ever since we broke up, he’s been acting stranger and stranger — showing up at places he knows I’ll be, sending messages that alternate between apologies and accusations. It’s like he can’t decide if he wants me back or wants to make me regret ever knowing him. I kept telling myself he’d get over it eventually, that he just needed time. But lately, his behavior had me on edge, and I began wondering if he’d ever really let go.

I’d never go back to him; that’s something I’m certain of. He crossed too many lines, left too many scars I can’t forget. But now, it’s like he’s everywhere—lurking just out of sight, always one step behind me. I feel his presence even when he’s not there, a constant, heavy reminder that he’s still watching, still obsessing.

I’ve started checking over my shoulder more often, catching myself dreading the sound of my phone vibrating with yet another message from him. I tell myself it’s just paranoia, that he’s all talk and no real threat. But some small part of me can’t shake the fear that this time, he might actually be out of control.

And I was right to be cautious. Because he finally crossed the line I’d been hoping he’d stay behind. When I got home, my stomach twisted as I saw it; my car, with its tires slashed and a deep scratch running along the side. It was unmistakably his work; I’d ignored his messages, blocked his number, and now he was trying to force my attention.

My hands shook as I took in the damage, a mix of anger and dread flooding through me. How could he stoop this low? He knew that car was everything to me, the one thing I’d saved for and bought on my own. The memories of late nights spent driving to clear my head, the freedom it gave me — he’d tainted all of it in a single, desperate act. I wanted to scream, to call him and let him know just how furious I was. But I knew that’s exactly what he wanted.

He wanted a reaction, wanted me to feel trapped and afraid, wanted to pull me back into his twisted little game. But I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. Instead, I took a deep breath, locked my jaw, and stared at my car.

"What.. the fuck is that?" My brother's voice echoed in my ears and I turned around to see that he was with Chris.

"Fred. Fucking Fred." I screamed, not able to contain my anger.

"That bastard.. I will fucking kill him." He said and got closer to the car to see the damage, "calm down" was what Chris said to him.

Chris looked shocked and angry, he walked towards me, "this motherfucker lives nearby?"

"Yeah… just a few blocks away." I sat down on the ground, pulling my legs to my chest and hugging them tightly. I looked up at Chris, my voice trembling, "that was my fucking car..." a tear slipped down my cheek, and in that moment, I couldn’t tell if it was from anger or sadness.

Chris clenched his jaw, and I felt a rush of warmth as his hand reached down to cup my cheek. His touch was soft, gentle, and completely disarming. I couldn’t remember the last time someone had held me like that, with such tenderness. He looked down at me with a promising expression, his eyes filled with determination. “I’ll see what I can do about your car. I might have a friend who can fix it.”

His thumb brushed softly against my skin, and I felt a flutter in my stomach, a strange mix of comfort and something deeper. The way he touched me sent a shiver down my spine, pulling me out of my anger for just a moment. In such a chaotic moment, I couldn’t help but think it was nice seeing him like this for once. I stayed silent and leaned into his hand, seeking that warmth, desperate for a distraction from the whirlwind of emotions coursing through me.

I was rather quiet the following days – I didn't want to go out of the house much. Not because this asshole scared me with what he did, but because that car meant a lot to me. Me and my brother lived by ourselves, and that car was the only thing I could call my own. Fred would pay and I'd make sure of that.

I was alone in my room getting ready for work, trying to drown out the chaos of the previous days when I heard the front door slam shut. My heart raced with curiosity and unease. Just as I was about to head downstairs, my brother’s voice boomed through the house, cutting through the silence, “what the hell happened to you?”

I sprang to my feet, instinctively rushing toward the sound of the voices. As I reached the living room, I froze at the sight before me. Chris was leaning against the wall, blood dripping from a cut on his eyebrow and cheek, and staining his shirt. My brother stood in front of him, fists clenched, a mixture of concern and fury etched across his face.

“Chris, what the actual fuck!” my brother exclaimed, his voice a mix of anger and worry. Chris turned his gaze toward me, and in that moment, everything else faded. Despite the blood and bruises, there was a softness in his eyes that held me captive, a silent plea that made my heart race.

“I’m fine,” Chris replied, though his voice was strained. He shifted slightly, not even a single emotion of fear, or pain, nothing. If anything, he had a pleased expression on his face, I could almost make out a smile. My brother continued to glare at him, demanding answers, but Chris seemed unwilling to give them to him.

“What happened?” I asked, stepping closer, my heart pounding. Chris’s gaze flickered back to my brother, and for a brief moment, I felt a wave of unease wash over me. I could sense that whatever had happened involved more than just a simple altercation, and the tension in the air was thick with unspoken words.

"Nothing happened. I just shouldn't have gone to Mike's. There was another fight and I got involved." My brother seemed to know what he was talking about, because his whole body language changed, softened.

"I told you, asshole. You should never go to Mike's. This bar is a shithole." He went off to the kitchen, probably going to grab something to clean the blood.

I walked closer to Chris, my sweaty fingers digging into my leather bag. I reached out hesitantly, my fingers trembling as I brushed against his cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin contrasted by the coolness of the blood that trickled down from the cut above his eyebrow.

“Chris,” I whispered, my voice barely above a breath, my heart racing. “Does it hurt a lot?” My fingertips lingered on his skin, tracing the line of the wound as if I could somehow erase the pain with my touch. His eyes locked onto mine, a storm of emotions swirling within them — vulnerability, frustration, and a glimmer of something deeper that sent shivers down my spine.

He winced slightly at my touch but didn’t pull away. Instead, he leaned into my hand, a subtle gesture that felt almost intimate in the tense air between us.

“Not much.” he said, his voice low and rough, but it was the way he looked at me that stole my breath. There was a rawness in his gaze, as if he was baring a part of himself that he’d kept hidden, and in that moment, everything else faded away.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” I asked, my thumb brushing lightly over his jawline, searching his eyes for reassurance. The moment felt suspended in time, a fragile bubble where nothing else mattered but the two of us. His expression softened, and I could see the flicker of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips despite the pain.

“I will be,” he replied, his gaze steady and unwavering, filled with a mixture of gratitude and something that felt like longing. It was as if, in that brief exchange, we shared an unspoken promise — a connection that transcended the chaos around us. My heart raced, and for the first time since the chaos began, I felt a sense of calm in the storm.

Having to go to work and leave him like this pained me, but I had to go, "I have to go to work.." I explained.

"Mhm. D'you want me to take you to work?" He said and I sighed.

"No. Of course not. Stay here, with my brother. I'll see you.. later." I nodded my head and said goodbye one last time before leaving.

The night air was cool against my skin as I walked home from work, each step feeling heavier than the last. The streetlights cast a faint glow on the pavement, illuminating the shadows that seemed to stretch endlessly in the darkness. My thoughts were consumed by what had happened — I couldn’t shake the image of him standing there, bloodied yet resilient, leaning into my touch.

My heart raced at the memory, but alongside it was a gnawing concern. What kind of trouble had he gotten himself into? It was like him to end up in trouble, but I'd never actually see him like this.

As I approached my apartment, a sudden impulse gripped me. I didn’t want to go home and drown in my thoughts; I wanted to see Chris again. I needed to know he was okay, to check on him in a way that felt more personal than just a casual conversation. With each step toward his place, a mix of anxiety and anticipation bubbled within me.

I turned the corner, the familiar path leading me to his apartment building. The windows were dimly lit, casting a warm glow that made me feel a little lighter despite the weight of everything else. I hesitated for a moment, wondering if I was overstepping or if he’d even want to see me after everything that had happened. But the thought of him alone, nursing his wounds and possibly replaying the day in his mind, pushed me forward.

I climbed the stairs, my heart pounding louder with each step. When I reached his door, I raised my hand and knocked softly, the sound echoing in the silence of the hallway. What if he wasn’t ready to see me? But as I waited, I couldn’t help but hope that he’d open the door, that he’d let me in — not just to his apartment, but to whatever was going on in his life.

"What.. are you doing here?" He furrowed his eyebrows, a little band-aid covering the wound on his eyebrow now, a cigarette between his lips.

"Sorry, Chris.. I couldn't.. stop thinking about you. I mean.. what happened to you.. today." I was nervous, I couldn't quite understand why.

He cleared his throat and stepped aside to let me in, and of course, I wasted no time. I sat down on his couch and he sat down beside me. So many years of knowing him, and I've never actually been inside his house, so I took a quick look around, trying to take in everything I could.

"I'm fine. I told you." He insisted and sipped from his beer that was on the coffee table, his cigarette nearly done now.

"Your cheek is swollen, you didn't even bother putting some ice on it. Geez." I huffed and got up to go to the kitchen, opening the freezer and wrapping some ice cubes in a towel.

I walked back to him and sat closer to him, cupping his cheek and gently pressing the ice on his other cheek. Only then did I realise how close we were, I could feel his breath fanning over my lips, his dark blue eyes staring into mine.

"My fiend. Zack. He will help you with the car." He whispered and I whispered back, "thank you.. so much."

The sight of him so vulnerable, the blood still seeping from the cut and the way he tried to mask the pain, made something deep within me stir. I forgot about everything else — the fight, the worry, the uncertainty of where we stood. All I could focus on was him and the way he looked at me, those fierce eyes filled with a mix of gratitude and something more that made my pulse quicken.

I could see the way he held back a flinch, how he tried to remain stoic despite the pain. I felt the heat rising in my cheeks, a flush of desire that surprised me. I wanted to kiss him, to close the distance between us and erase the hurt with something softer, something intimate.

As I leaned closer, his gaze flickered to mine, and in that moment, everything else faded away.

“Chris,” I murmured, my voice barely above a whisper, as I hesitated just inches from his face. I could sense that he was just as caught up in the moment as I was, his eyes darkening with something that mirrored my own feelings.

Then, before I could overthink it, I closed the distance between us, pressing my lips against his. The kiss was soft at first, tentative, as if we were both afraid of what this moment meant. But as I felt him respond, his hand gently cupping my neck, deepening the kiss, I knew I had crossed a line that I never wanted to return from.

The kiss was hungry, needy. I needed to catch my breath. As we pulled away for a breath, my heart raced, and I felt a rush of conflicting emotions, “this is so wrong..” I whispered, my forehead resting against his.

“I know,” Chris replied, his voice thick with desire. He searched my eyes, a mix of guilt and longing swirling between us, "I cant stop now.”

“I shouldn’t be here,” I breathed, feeling the warmth of his body so close. Yet I leaned in again, capturing his lips with mine once more.

He pulled back slightly, looking conflicted, “what if your brother finds out?”

“I don’t.. care right now,” I admitted, my hands threading through his hair as I kissed him again, the heat of the moment overwhelming any reservations I had, “I just want to be here with you.”

“I shouldn’t want this,” he murmured against my lips, his breath mingling with mine, “but I do.”

“Me too,” I confessed, pulling him closer, lost in the moment, “I can’t stop.”

“Then don’t,” he whispered, his eyes darkening with intensity, “don't think about anything else.”

With that, we dove back into the kiss, the world outside fading as we lost ourselves in each other.

As I left Chris's apartment that night, a rush of exhilaration filled me, and I realised that the unexpected had happened; my ex hadn’t reached out at all since the incident with the car. And for the first time in weeks, I felt a weight lift from my shoulders.

A few days later, while I was passing by my brother's room, I heard him talking on the phone. Curiosity piqued, I paused outside the door, trying to listen in.

“I can’t believe you did that, man,” my brother said, his tone a mix of disbelief and admiration, “how did you even find his place?”

“This bitch peed his pants when he saw me.” Chris replied, his voice low but amused, “it wasn't that hard, just had to ask around.”

Something shifted inside of me, realizing that Chris had taken matters into his own hands.

“You know, you didn’t have to do that, I was planning on destroying his car instead", my brother said.

“But I wanted to,” Chris replied firmly, and I could hear him chuckle at what my brother said next.

I stepped back, my heart racing. So, it was Chris who had put an end to my ex’s harassment. I couldn’t help but smile, feeling a warmth spread through me. I knew then that my feelings for Chris were deeper than I had allowed myself to acknowledge, and knowing he had my back made me feel safer than ever.

I found myself running back to his apartment again, right then and there, running up the stairs of his building as if someone was chasing me. I knocked on the door, loud enough for him to open it quickly, worry written in his eyes.

"What–"

And this time I didn't let him finish. With tears in my eyes, I pressed my lips against his and lost myself in his arms.

⠀

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personasintro · 1 year ago

Text

Mutual Help | #44

↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; in order for you to pretend to be his girlfriend, he helps you with your sexual desires ⏤ he calls it mutual help

⇢ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jungkook x reader

⇢ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fake dating au, fluff, angst, smut, slow burn

⇢ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: explicit language, mature content

⇢ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 20.9k+

⇠ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯. | 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ⇢

"Hey, Mrs. Linn, thank you so much," you say while sending an appreciative smile towards the older lady, one of Jungkook's neighbors who probably used to see you more often than ever, as she holds the door for you when she sees your hands are full.

"Oh, don't thank me dear," she waves her hand before both of you make your way towards the elevator. "We all get our hands full sometimes."

Whenever you see her, you see interest and curiosity in her eyes, probably wondering why you are visiting Jungkook so often. It's not just her though. People talk and they get nosy, especially the older aged neighbors that have nothing adventurous going on throughout their day. Mrs. Linn is curious, but always sweet and never asks you about anything that could be considered as nosy or uncomfortable.

She knows you're visiting Jungkook, something you told her when she asked you if you're a new neighbor. Without too many details, you explained that your best friend lives here and you're just visiting him often. Ever since January, you've been coming here almost every day, depending on how you, Jimin and Taehyung take turns. It's March right now, so most of Jungkook's neighbors already recognize your faces, quickly classifying you as Jungkook's friends.

Mrs. Linn gets off the elevator first, living a few floors below Jungkook's floor, but she doesn't forget to send a nice greeting towards you once again as you return it, closing the elevator's door by pressing a button once she disappears behind the corner.

The walk towards Jungkook is always the same. The familiar hallway feels like a second home to you by now. A hope that things are better with him and a justified part of fear always walks you through your way towards his apartment. Pulling out the card and pressing the password of his home isn't as easy with your hands full of bags, but somehow you manage when the lock clicks and a little melody lets you know you've successfully opened the front door.

Setting down the bags on the floor, you take off your shoes and hang your leather jacket beside Jungkook's, taking the bags with you as you make it through his apartment. Surprisingly, Jungkook isn't slouched on his big couch while watching whatever he hasn't watched on Netflix yet. He is still in the living room though, barely giving you a glance as you pause and stare at him while he's lifting up the dumbbells.

Shirtless, while wearing his sport shorts he glances at you with an unbothered gaze, almost ignoring you as he keeps working out despite your presence there. Not that you expected anything more. He probably thought you're not coming here tonight.

You had to work overtime a little bit and then the wait for a take-out took half an hour. You're not an idiot. He's probably annoyed by the constant visits by either of you, Jimin or Taehyung. So far, he hasn't said anything and just went along with it. But none of you are stupid, you know he probably finds all of this ridiculous.

Ignoring him, you sigh and place the take-out on his coffee table, eyes not ignoring the two cans of beer that are probably empty.

"I brought us some chinese and sushi," you tell him, knowing he hears you even through the faint sounds of some TV show coming out of his television. "Come eat." Is what you tell him as you make your way towards the bathroom to wash your hands.

Surprisingly and luckily, Jungkook's dumbbells are laying on the floor behind his couch by the time you make it back. Your friend already sits on the couch and opens a few boxes of take-out while the delicious smell fills his living room. Plopping onto the space next to him, you glance at him to check up on him without saying a word.

His long black hair is falling onto his eyes a little, some of it sticking to his face because he's sweaty from his work-out. Still, you get to smell a faint scent of his cologne. Half-naked sitting next to you, tattoos on full display and a couple of more he got in addition to his pieces the last and this month, you're trying to focus on why you came here in the first place.

"Thanks for the food," he tells you as he opens the box and you notice he has brought cutlery for the both of you when you were in the bathroom.

"Of course," you smile, reaching for your food as your stomach grumbles, notifying you of the hanger you've been feeling ever since the diner time.

Jungkook turns up the volume a little, both of you focusing on the food and TV. As much as your curiosity and concern tells you to fully check on Jungkook, you keep your eyes off him knowing he's annoyed by the constant worried looks all of you give him. He's the first one to finish his food, cleaning after himself before he disappears in his bathroom. A minute later, you hear water running which makes you sigh as you grow already full, putting back down the leftovers.

It's been like these for two months now. Ever since the truth came out. The first weeks were the worst. Jungkook wouldn't talk to anyone, he wouldn't even eat properly which made you terribly concerned when you clearly saw he lost some weight.

Kiko has ruined him.

What hurts you is to see him going through this and there's nothing you can do to ease the pain and loss he's feeling. He wouldn't even talk to you which hurts the most. But this isn't about you.

At least he's slowly getting better, even though you're not sure if you could call it that. He's obviously going through a lot of pain and a heartbreak, and maybe he doesn't confide in any of you, but at least he tries to stay busy. He's working more than usual and if he isn't, he's probably stuck in a gym. There are always two options where he is at, if he's not home.

Pulling out your phone, you're not too surprised to see Jimin checking on you and Jungkook.

Jiminie: how is he?

"As usual, nothing new tbh" You type back, sighing as you rub your forehead looking around.

Well, at least he keeps his apartment clean and doesn't forget to take care of himself as well. There were days when he would barely walk out of his room, pleading with you, Jimin and Taehyung to leave as he insisted on being alone. You didn't like that and if it weren't for Jimin's persuition, you'd never leave him alone.

Although, they didn't find out about Kiko and what she's been hiding this whole time right away. It took them a week to realize there's something going on, especially when Jungkook wouldn't pick up his phone and your conscience couldn't make out too many excuses why you can't hang out with them.

"Jimin and Tae are asking about you... I think you should at least text them, they're worried." You told Jungkook a day after he found out about Kiko. You refused to leave him alone in that state, especially when his kitchen looked like a tornado happened there.

Jungkook could barely stand on his feet, but still insisted on cleaning after himself so you wouldn't cut yourself on the shattered glass. You didn't listen to him though, and helped him, using his then current state so he wouldn't scold you.

He didn't tell you anything when you told him about your worried friends, that's until they got fed up with your lame excuses and Jungkook's lame of a text saying 'he's busy' and came to Jungkook's. When they saw you and the guilty yet sad look you gave them, their thoughts were proved right that there's something happening.

Jiminie: is he as annoyed as he was yesterday?

Well, you didn't see him yesterday but you heard from Jimin that Jungkook wasn't in the mood of having one of you there again. You get that. But you also know Jungkook and he definitely doesn't want to be alone all the time. So whenever one of you can, you always make sure to hang out with Jungkook and silently let him know that he's not alone. He's been trying to push all of you away, but you're stubborn. He would do the same thing if the roles were reversed.

"he hasn't said anything but yeah, I think he is lol"

Even the 'lol' sounds sarcastic and painful, it makes you scoff at yourself.

Jiminie: he's softest around you out of us three

Jiminie: good luck with golden boy you'll need it

"wow thanks, what a support"

He sends you a laughing emoji back, causing you to snort at him before you toss your phone next to you, just as the bathroom door opens and Jungkook walks out of there wearing cotton shorts with a shirt covering his upper body. Hair wet from the shower, you can already smell the scent of his scented shower gel as he walks towards the couch and past you.

Noticing the dark circles underneath his eyes, your heart breaks at the sight but you force yourself to look away as you make yourself comfortable, staring at the TV even though you could care less about the show it's playing there.

"You know, you don't have to come here almost every day. I'm not a kid." Jungkook speaks up for the first time, and you almost cry out of happiness when you finally hear his voice. He doesn't sound broken, but he's not fine for sure.

You glance at him, chuckling at him as your eyes meet. Trying to keep yourself composed, ignoring how his dark circles basically scream for attention, you look away. "Tell that to Jimin and Taehyung too."

Your voice is light and humorous, acting as if your almost every day visit is just a casual thing. Both of you know why you're doing this and Jungkook sees right through you, although he doesn't call you out on it. It's pointless anyway.

"I already did," he murmurs, staring down at his hands that rest on his lap. "It's... I--you don't have to come here Y/N." he says, features twisted painfully when he says it as if the last thing he wants is to hurt you with his words. You know he doesn't mean it that way.

"I want to," you tell him immediately, seeing him looking away as he sighs. "Kook," you call out to him, seeing him looking at you again as you straighten yourself and scoot closer to him. "If you don't want me here, then tell me. I'll leave right away and I won't come back unless you call me."

You don't like this idea and you've tried to be there for him for sometime over two months now. You're not sure if your presence is helping in any way, but you also don't want to make him feel worse because you're too stubborn to let him deal with this on his own.

Throughout this heartbreak and loss that he's experiencing, Jungkook has never openly said he doesn't want you here. Sure, his behavior probably indicated he's somehow annoyed at your, Jimin's and Taehyung's not so oblivious attempts of trying to look after him through this stage of his current state. But he never explicitly said he doesn't want you here and that's why you keep coming and haven't left already. This is Jungkook you're talking about. You wouldn't leave him just like that.

But if it's something he truly wants and he'll feel better, then so be it.

"I--" Jungkook stops, shutting his eyes as he rubs them while resting his elbows on his knees. "I didn't mean to sound like an asshole. I--what I meant is, that you don't have to babysit me. Nor Jimin and Taehyung have too."

Sighing, you scoot closer to him before your hands make contact with his back, feeling how tense he is. One hand rubbing his back while the other caringly squeezes his shoulder, you shake your head. "We don't babysit you, I don't think you'd do something stupid. We're just worried, Kook. You've been through a lot. I know we can't make the pain go away, but we're here for you."

He stays silent for a moment and you see him nod before he groans. "But this is ridiculous. You guys don't have to come and check on me as if I'm not capable of living my life. You don't have to bring me food as if I'm not capable of doing that on my own. I--I'm sure you guys have other things to do, more important things to do in your evenings and days than checking on me as if I'm some kid."

"You're just acting like one sometimes," you tell him lightly, joking as you nudge your shoulder against his which makes him roll his eyes. Chuckling, you lean your head against his biceps. "You're not alone in this, Kook. If we didn't want to be here for you, we wouldn't come here at all."

You feel his shift, causing you to pull away slightly to get a glimpse at him. He's looking at you, face saying thousands of words and it pains you to see the sadness and pain that's still there. However, there is a glimpse of fondness in his eyes as he searches your face.

"I don't mean to sound ungrateful," he says softly, the corner of his lips lifting up slightly when you lean your head back against his biceps while staring up at him with big and curious eyes. "I'm--I'm gonna be fine. It just takes some time."

He doesn't sound convinced though.

"Of course you will," you tell him, cheek pressed against his arm. "Heartbreak isn't fatal." you remind him softly, knowing that one day he'll be able to look back onto this stage in his life and admire himself for being so strong.

"Then why do I feel like it is?" he asks quietly, your face twisting in a worry as you pull away, still holding him close to you.

"Have you considered talking to someone?" you ask, watching his brows scrunch into a frown as you lick your lips and open your mouth to explain yourself. "Like a therapist?"

As soon as those words leave your mouth, Jungkook rolls his eyes and tries to pull away from you but you hold him close and quickly continue.

"You're not just experiencing heartbreak, Kook. I'm really worried about you, there's nothing wrong with talking about this with someone professional." you tell him, voice more loud and clear.

"I got you." he says, causing you to nod.

"You got me," you confirm, "But you haven't been talking to me much, which is fine. And that's why I think, maybe it'd be a good--"

"No, I don't need a therapist." He quickly declines your idea which makes you sigh in disappointment but you're not trying to pressure him into something he doesn't want to. You just think it's a good idea if he spoke about his feelings openly, maybe get advice from a professional that can guide him to the right path.

You're no professional. Maybe whatever advice you'd come up with wouldn't help him. Maybe you'd advise him of something wrong. You don't want that.

"Okay, it's your decision. I'm not here trying to make you do something you don't want to." you remind him softly, squeezing his shoulder for the last time before you pull away but your eyes don't leave him.

You see the side of his face, him looking at his feet as he bites into the inside of his cheek. It's like he's trying to hold back whatever that wants to spill out and he embraces himself to open his mouth. You watch him with concern, ready to tell him that he doesn't have to say anything but before you can, he already speaks.

"Hoseok texted me today," he starts, closing his eyes briefly while you keep your mouth shut, letting him continue whenever he wants. "He's... coming here tomorrow to pick up her stuff."

He says, voice completely heartbroken as he mentions Kiko without actually saying her name and you know it pains him even more than you who's just looking at him.

"Have you talked to her?"

That makes him scoff and he shakes his head. "No, not since that day... I told her I never want to see her again, so she probably told Hoseok to come and pick her stuff." Yeah, that makes sense.

"Would you like to see her?" you ask carefully, watching his reaction as he stays frozen for a moment before he shakes his head.

"No, it's... I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to face her." he murmurs, rubbing his face again. You realize he's doing that to distract himself.

"Then it's a good thing Hoseok will come instead of her." you murmur, nibbling on your bottom lip.

Jungkook stays silent, sitting without barely moving before a scoff resounds from him. "I don't even know if I want to face him."

"Then tell him not to come. You don't owe him any explanation. If you're not ready, then just don't do it." you advise him, but he only shakes his head.

"No, I can't stand looking at her things scattered all over this apartment. It's better if he comes to get it..."

"Okay," you nod, reaching for his hair as you brush it off his face. "You want me to stay here tonight?"

He turns to you to look at you, "No, no... I'm sure you've other things to do."

You playfully roll your eyes at him, "I actually don't," you point out, "Tomorrow is Saturday, so I'd probably spend it alone anyway. I could be here when Hoseok comes? If that helps."

He frowns, probably ready to protest but you arch your brow at him, letting him know that it's totally fine and you'd like to stay anyway to make sure he's okay. So he sighs, nodding at you. "Alright, I... that would be fine."

Sending him an encouraging smile, you reach for the controller that's been sitting on the coffee table. "You up for a game?"

He definitely doesn't look like he's in the mood for that, but you wiggle your brows at him. "I'll kick your ass this time."

Jungkook knows what you're trying to do, but eventually after looking at you he scoffs amusingly before he snatches the controller from your hands. "We'll see about that." he mutters, the competitive side of him kicking in as you can't help but grin at him while he's starting to set up the game.

After two months of barely getting any response from Jungkook, you finally see a glimpse of the old him and you just can't fight the grin off your face. Not even when he truly kicks your ass in every game and round you play. He's not rubbing it into your face like he usually would, or joking about it but when he cocks his brow at you, a look that says 'I told you', you couldn't be happier with the progress he has managed to make.

Sometime during the night, when all the lights are turned off and the only glimpse of natural light is the moon peeking from the blinds, you turn around on Jungkook's bed. The movement is careless and you momentarily forget that you're actually sharing a bed with him. Yes, after proposing that you sleep on his big couch, Jungkook completely refused your idea and told you to go to sleep in his room. He said he'll take the couch which didn't sit with you well, after five minutes of bickering you settled on sharing the bed.

It's not the first time you both are sharing a bed. It's not a big deal. Plus, you're both single. It has never been a big deal for you to share a bed.

When your arm slaps against the mattress on Jungkook's side, you already wait for him to wake up and scold you for taking up most of the space like what happened too many times. But you're met with an empty space beside you which makes you crack your eyes open, lifting your head while your rustled hair falls onto your face. Groaning, you push them away just to be met with Jungkook nowhere to be seen.

Looking around, it takes you a while to notice he's not in the room. You could easily go back to sleep, but something doesn't seem right about Jungkook not being here. Sure, he could've gone to the bathroom or something. But all you can think about is his dark circles, which is enough proof that he probably has trouble sleeping. Pulling the duvet off your body, you don't bother to put on the slippers as you open the door from his room. Your head slightly pounds from the lack of sleep but you ignore it, eyes scrunched when you spot a light coming from the kitchen.

It's a dim lightning, nothing too bright but enough for you to notice Jungkook standing with his back turned to you, facing the kitchen light that's under the cabinet that isn't as invasive as the normal lightning would be.

You approach him quietly, your feet paddling against the floor. "Can't sleep?"

He doesn't flinch or jump from your sudden presence, but he turns his head to you abruptly as if he was caught doing something. It's only then when you notice the bottle of whiskey in front of him and a glass settled right next to it. He looks at you guilty, looking away as if he didn't want you to see it.

Sighing, you lean against the counter with your lower back as you watch him. "Does it help?"

"Couldn't fall asleep," he murmurs, "It usually helps me to fall asleep faster,"

You bite back the scolding you would most likely give him in other scenarios. But he wouldn't be drinking in other scenarios to help him to fall asleep, would he?

"Go back to bed, I'll be there soon." he tells you, grabbing the glass before he pours the entire dark liquid that's been there into his mouth.

Watching his neck bop at the movement, he swallows it as he bites onto his lower lip. His tattooed hand goes to his hair, running through them before he grips the edge of the kitchen counter. He's not going to get rid of you that easily, plus you can't go back to sleep knowing he's here drinking and trying to fight with insomnia this way.

Jungkook gives you a look when you turn around, hoisting yourself up to the kitchen counter to sit on it as you give him a smile. "Pour me one too."

Frowning, he stares at you. "Don't be ridiculous. You don't drink this late."

"Neither you used to," you tell him softly, "Fine, then I'll take the bottle."

Before your hand can reach the bottle, Jungkook is already snatching it as he rolls his eyes at you and pours a small amount into the glass, sliding it towards you. "You take the glass, I'll take the bottle." he says defeatedly which makes you grin in success.

"Fine by me," you hum, tasting the alcohol as you cringe right away but swallow it anyway, ignoring Jungkook's raised and knowing look. "How long have you been up?" you ask, trying to make a conversation.

After the games you both played, you went to take a shower and take off the make-up to get ready for the bed. Jungkook has lent you one of his shirts and luckily found one of your pajama shorts you always kept here during your summer sleepovers. Once you were done, Jungkook was already in bed staring at the ceiling and once you had joined him, he turned off the lights and went to sleep. At least that's what you thought because by the time ten minutes had passed away, you had already fallen asleep.

Looking at the digital clock on his stove, you realize it's three in the morning. You've slept for four hours.

"I never fell asleep." he admits silently, ignoring your worried gaze as he drinks from the bottle.

"How long is this lasting?" you ask quietly, not wanting to sound as if you're scolding him. You're worried.

"Ever since that day," he answers, causing you to suck in breath as your heart cracks at the new information. This is even more serious than you've thought. You knew there's obviously something more going on with him, something you, Jimin or Taehyung know about. "But I don't drink every day, especially during the week when I've to work and drive the next day."

At least he's responsible, you think as you look away from him and sigh. "It breaks my heart to see you like this, Kook." you admit quietly, voice almost cracking as he glances at you, eyes filled with sadness and guilt.

"That's why I didn't want you to come here and see me like this." he says back but you only shake your head.

"Don't say that," you lick your lips, "I'd rather be here than wondering how you are doing."

"Isn't it obvious?" he scoffs, glancing at you as you sigh in defeat but silently agree with him. He doesn't sound angry at you, he's angry at the situation, at the pain he's feeling. It's like you can understand what he's going through, even though realistically you've no idea how much pain he's enduring.

Attention taken away by a movement, you watch Jungkook walking towards one of the cupboards as he pulls out something that rustles in his hold before he hands you the item. It's a pack of crackers, it makes you smile as you look up at him with a question in your eyes.

"So you won't feel sick from the whiskey," he explains, watching you grin at him as you open it, plopping a cracker into your mouth before you point towards your glass, silently telling him to pour you one more.

He looks skeptical but he does it either way which you thank him for. Offering him the pack of crackers, he shakes his head with a faint smile but it's very short-lived when it drops and he's back to his sadself.

Silently, you munch on the snack. This is the worst. You've no idea what to say. Distracting him is too obvious and something tells you he's not in the mood for that. Trying to make a conversation at three in the morning is... what would you even talk about? Even from your point of view, all you can focus on is the elephant in the room but it's Jungkook's call. You're not going to make him talk when he clearly doesn't want to.

So you sit on the kitchen counter while Jungkook stands beside you, taking a sip from the whiskey every now and then as you both are enveloped by the silence. After a few minutes, you place the pack of crackers down at the same time when Jungkook suddenly scoffs. He's been in his own world for the past few minutes, clearly thinking and almost forgetting about your presence.

"Isn't it funny?" he asks, tone dripping with sarcasm, hurt and sorrow. He swallows another shot before he continues. "I would be a dad by now,"

You don't think you've ever heard him like this. So empty, yet so broken and angry at the same time. His words make your chest clench, heart fully empathizing with the sadness from all of this. Jungkook would be an amazing dad, whether he'd be ready for it or not. He fully dedicates himself to everything, he always does things at hundred percent. No less.

"All those times," His voice cracks, eyes pinching together as he rubs them while you straighten yourself, staring at him with nothing but sympathy and worry.

However, you keep your mouth shut. It's very rare for Jungkook to be sharing something so personal with you these days and you don't want to ruin it by saying anything. So, you just let him talk and get it off his chest.

"You called me a dad as a joke," Your mouth falls open, eyes watering at the sight of Jungkook's broken glance he gives you. "We joked about that a lot. If only I knew--" He stops himself, visibly taking a deep and shaky breath to stop himself from crying.

Reaching for his arm, you grasp it and pull him towards you. Surprisingly, he doesn't protest but looks at you with a confusion written all over his broken face, until you can't see it anymore because your cheek is pressed against his chest. Cuddling up to him and wrapping your arms around his frame, you hug him tightly.

"I'm so sorry, Kook," you cry to his chest and you feel him tense, before he sighs and hugs you back. "I'm so sorry." you whisper, staining his shirt with your tears he undoubtedly starts to feel.

"It's not your fault..." he mumbles, leaning his cheek against the top of your head.

"I know, but it breaks my heart to see you going through this," you admit, sniffling as you feel him pull away. He meets your teary gaze, giving you a weak smile as he wipes off your tears. "You don't deserve this."

Dropping his hands, he doesn't protest because he knows that's true. It's not selfish of him to admit it. He has never done anything to hurt Kiko. He has always showered her with so much love and respect, and she broke his heart for the second time just like that. You've never seen her being hurt like that when she stormed out of Jungkook's apartment looking like a complete mess. She really is sorry but it's no excuse for what she has done to him. She has ruined him.

"I'm pathetic," Jungkook scoffs, shaking his head as he leans against the kitchen island, right on the opposite side of where you're sitting. "I'm so fucking pathetic,"

You tilt your head to the side, watching him rub his eyes for a moment and you want nothing more than to envelop him in a hug once again.

"I gave her a second chance, I trusted her. I made a fool out of myself, I fucking--I was forgiving her for cheating--a fucking cheating!" he exclaims, making you flinch but you stay glued to your spot, gripping the edge of the counter tightly. "I love--loved her so fucking much, I would give her the world!"

"Kook--"

"And she broke my heart like I never meant anything to her!"

It doesn't matter that it's the middle of the night and he could possibly wake up his neighbors. You're genuinely scared he's going to break all over again. Not because you're scared of him. You're scared for him.

"Would you rather live in a lie?" you ask softly, making him pause for a moment.

"What?" he breathes out.

"Would you rather think she cheated? Or believed she broke up with you because she needed space? I know it hurts, Kook," you say softly and carefully, "I might not fully understand the pain you're going through... but isn't it better that you know the truth? Even if it hurts..."

He knows you're right. She made a fool out of him, just like he said. Maybe not purposely, in a twisted way you understand why she did that, hid the truth from him. To spare him the pain she's been feeling and experiencing on her own, even though... Can their pain be compared? She had a choice, Jungkook hadn't.

"It hurts so much..." he whispers, and you swear you hear your heart cracking. Hopping off the counter, you go straight to hug him all over again.

"What can I do?" you murmur into his shirt, tightening your grip as his hands drop at your shoulders, squeezing them.

"Don't leave me?" he asks unsurely, feeling pathetic to be asking you that and mainly for sounding like a pathetic fool as well.

Giving him the softest smile, your lips slightly wobbling when you look into his big dark eyes. Grabbing one of his hands that's sitting on your shoulder, you squeeze it as you don't break eye contact.

"Never."

And that's enough of a confirmation Jungkook needs, sending you a weak smile for the first time in a long time. When you lead him to his bedroom after turning off the light, leaving the alcohol abandoned on the kitchen counter along with your glass, you both hide yourselves under the covers. You hold his hands, caressing his knuckles and the back of his hands, until your eyes flutter shut and your movements slow down. The last thing you feel is Jungkook doing the same for you, until his hands slow down and he allows himself to fall asleep.

Jungkook has always been an early bird. It's something you've admired about him, or more like have been jealous about. He'd wake up at six in the morning and by the time the clock hit eight, he'd had his breakfast and workout done amongst other things.

Things have changed though. It's not shocking to not see him sleeping next to you by the time you wake up. He might have used to wake up early to be productive, always wanted to do something and despite all of that, he calls himself lazy. But right now, you're not even sure if he even fell asleep to be able to wake up. Your own tiredness chased you down last night and as far as you can remember, it felt like he was still awake by the time your breathing slowed down and dreams awaited for you.

He's distracting himself, this time from the awaited visit from Hoseok that should be coming any minute. It's not hard to figure that out because by the time you clean up yourself in his bathroom and change your clothes, breakfast is already waiting for you with a cup of tea you like.

Jungkook's leaning against the kitchen counter with a spaced out expression and a cup of coffee in his hand, as he slowly brings it to his lips. He looks tired but from your quick checking in, he does look a little bit better.

"Have you slept?" you ask right away, eyeing the breakfast and not sitting down just yet, fully focusing on him to show your persistence. You wonder how many times Jungkook has called you annoying in his head, but it's not like you care that much. Not as long as he gets his sleep.

Brown dark eyes flickering to you, you swear you see the corner of his lips twitching at your straightforwardness, very well known straightforwardness, before he sets down his cup with a click against the marble.

"I have," Is all he says and you sigh, not wanting to pressure him into saying more. "I made you breakfast."

"Just for me?" you cock your brow, happy to see the slightest of his grin and roll of his eyes as you sit down.

"Us," he corrects himself, surprisingly joining you.

Your eyes dancing across his face to check on him from close doesn't go unnoticed by him and he does have a little twinkle of amusement in his eyes. Grinning, you set your eyes on a bowl of fruit with strawberries and raspberries in it. The little chuckle that escapes Jungkook's lips is unheard by you as you grab the spoon and dig in.

"You know, you should eat more in the mornings. You know what they say, it's the most important meal of the day," Jungkook comments, not surprised by your choice out of all the other options on the table.

"And so is sleep," you say with a full mouth, earning Jungkook's daring and raised brow as you swallow the food before continuing. "I'd say it's more important than breakfast."

Jungkook scoffs a little, looking at his empty plate as he serves himself scrambled eggs and bread. "I did sleep."

"You did?" You don't sound convinced, raising your brows with a doubtful look.

Jungkook hums, putting some food into his mouth as he chews on it while you stare at him, slowly eating the breakfast he has prepared for the two of you.

"You don't have to worry about me,"

Yes, you do. You do worry about him because so far, you've never seen him in this state. Barely sleeping, looking so lifeless yet he's keeping himself occupied by working overtime and working out a lot which shouldn't necessarily be the worst thing. It's hard to describe, you're not sure what's good and bad for him but all you know is that he's still deeply hurting and he's keeping it to himself. He's holding it in.

"I slept okay, really."

Is he telling the truth? He still looks tired but he probably got more sleep. He's on edge, knowing today is the day when Hoseok is coming and he could be here anytime. And since he's holding it in, it's hard to say if he's doing better than he was yesterday. You wouldn't say so. Facing Hoseok isn't probably the most pleasant thing to do considering he's been trying to distract himself from Kiko. And since Hoseok is close to her and a big reminder of what she has done, it's like experiencing that pain all over again.

But maybe when Jungkook confided in you more about his thoughts and feelings, it got at least some small amount of weight off his chest. At least you hope so.

"I'm glad, or else I won't ever leave so I can check on you if you're sleeping well." you joke, lips twitching as you look up at Jungkook to see him crack a tiny smile.

He doesn't say anything but the silence isn't awkward at all, both of you eating in silence with thoughts still running. You realize you're even more nervous about Hoseok's visit than you're letting on.

You're worried.

Worried about how Hoseok is feeling about all of this. Worried about how Jungkook is going to react.

So if you're feeling this way, you can't imagine how Jungkook must be feeling.

The moment the doorbell rings, it seems like everything has frozen for a moment. You both know who's about to come upstairs and knock on Jungkook's door any second. The cup of tea that Jungkook has made you is placed on the coffee table by your tensed hands and as you're about to turn to Jungkook, he acts quickly and buzzes Hoseok in. Once he gets back, his eyes avoid you for a moment before he looks at you sitting on his couch with big and uncertain eyes.

It's hard to detect what emotion crosses Jungkook's face. Panic, anxiety, discomfort.

Hoseok coming for Kiko's things that are still laying around his apartment – being the painful reminder of their heart crushing break-up – is still a better option than Kiko coming for them by herself.

Jungkook did say he doesn't want to see her anymore, at least she respects his decision. Although, you think she probably isn't ready to face him as well.

You wish you could hate her though. Yes, you're mad at her for breaking Jungkook's heart all over again. He's in this state because of her lies. But during those weeks ever since Jungkook told you what happened, you thought about it and her a lot. The decision she made hadn't been easy. It's hard to even think about it because nobody knows what was going on inside her head. It's easy to judge but you're not totally sure what she went through.

Yes, you don't think her decision was right – at least her decision to leave Jungkook out of it when he was a huge part of it as well. But it's not your place to judge her decision when it's not you and not your body. You can't possibly imagine what she went through, even though some of it is thanks to her. She did it to herself but still, you find some kind of empathy and you actually feel bad for her.

She should've definitely told Jungkook. He deserved to know and that's a fact. Even if she wasn't planning to start a family with him, or whatever the other reason could be, she should've told him and they could've at least talked about it. Would Jungkook be able to convince her? What would he tell her? It's something you and maybe even Jungkook himself doesn't know.

And as soft knocks can be heard coming from the front door, Jungkook looks like he's ten seconds from truly panicking and all you want is to give him a hug that would help and take away all the stress and pain he's feeling. However, you stand up and send a soft smile his way, offering to get the door which he gives you what looks like a form of thankful smile.

On the other side, as you open the front door but not before taking a deep breath, is standing Hoseok that doesn't look much better. He looks slightly surprised to see you there but it only takes a few seconds. The discomfort is evident on his face, even through the soft smile he sends your way as greeting leaves his mouth.

"Hey," you tell him softly, lifting your lips. "I just--I'm here because--he's not feeling very well." You don't owe any explanation to Hoseok but the words jump out of you before you can keep your mouth shut. Hushed and sad tone makes Hoseok look at you in sympathy.

"I'm sorry," he says sadly, coming inside as you close the door behind him.

Hoseok doesn't look like this is the place he wants to be right now and it's totally understandable if you look at things from his point of view. He knew, but you know he was just as having his best friend's back as you're having Jungkook's. The honesty in his voice isn't hard to miss and you just know he really is sorry about everything.

You're just not a person he should be saying that to.

Nodding, you give him a lipped smile and lead him to Jungkook when he takes off his jacket. Not that he needs you, he knows Jungkook's apartment too but you can see how careful he is with each step he makes, even though his steps are light and rhythmic.

What isn't rhythmic is probably Jungkook's heartbeat when he hears you coming, knowing you're not alone as he hears two sets of steps and the lingering tension with Hoseok's arrival.

Noticing Hoseok's hesitance once you turn to look at him but his eyes are already set on Jungkook, who's standing near the couch not even fully facing you. From the corner of his eyes, he can make out the two of you but doesn't even spare a glance in your direction. Well, Hoseok's.

Hoseok opens his mouth, ready to greet him and Jungkook probably doesn't catch that but the timing is adding even more tension to the whole situation when he speaks first.

"Her stuff is in the bathroom and my room."

You wince at the distant and hard tone he sets. You understand he's upset and you mostly feel sorry for him, but that doesn't mean you don't feel an ounce of pity towards Hoseok as well. He just stands there, features softening and regret written all over again on his face mixed with sadness and understatement.

"Jungkook, I'm--"

"You're what?" Jungkook snaps, this time fully turning towards the two of you looking straight at his friend in anger and betrayal. He doesn't give him a chance to respond because Jungkook is currently a ticking bomb. "Sorry? You knew the whole time and now you're sorry? Don't give me that bullshit," he scoffs, causing Hoseok to sigh as he bites into the inside of his cheek.

"How dare you to look me in the eyes and just be sorry?" The tone of his voice raises but the only thing you can detect is the hurt behind it.

"Jungkook," you mumble as Jungkook is met with your face full of pity and sadness, but he only glances your way before he looks back at Hoseok.

He definitely has more strength to be facing Jungkook because if it was you in his place, you'd be a crying mess if Jungkook looked and spoke to you that way. And you almost whimper when Hoseok makes his way over to Jungkook, not sure if that's a good idea judging by Jungkook's sharp glare.

"Yes, Jungkook, I'm sorry," he says calmly, "I know you're mad at me and you've every reason to be, I fucked up and I've regretted that every time I thought about you,"

He walks past him towards one of the doors of Jungkook's bathroom and bedroom, stopping and turning to him once again.

"But she didn't want you to know and I had to respect that as her friend."

"Don't give me that bullshit!" Jungkook yells, causing you to flinch because even though you know he's mad, you weren't expecting him to yell as soon as Hoseok finishes his sentence. "You're my friend too! You were joking with me this whole time, we hung out and you looked me in the eyes knowing she was pregnant with my baby! You fucking knew and never said one fucking word!"

Hoseok's breath trembles as he takes a breath but keeps being composed despite Jungkook's evident anger.

Jungkook takes a few steps towards Hoseok and you tense before you do the same. You're not part of this, this is between them but you don't want this to end up in a huge fight.

"When did you find out?" he asks slowly with a warning tone, causing Hoseok to look down in shame for a moment before he finds the courage to look him in the eyes again.

"Jung--"

"Stop Jungkook me, just answer. You can at least do that much."

You frown, not really liking the tense atmosphere that gets tense with each second and word Jungkook or Hoseok say.

"She told me when she asked me to accompany her, she was broken, Jungkook. There's nothing I could've done to change her op--"

Jungkook lashes at Hoseok, grabbing him by the collar of his hoodie and you yelp, rushing towards them.

But Hoseok keeps talking, wanting to give Jungkook his answer. "She begged me not to tell--"

For one moment, it feels like a flashback from the New Year's Eve party when Jungkook lashed at Haneul, throwing a great punch to his face. But then... this is a completely different moment and you see Jungkook's fist in the air, causing you to act quickly. Hoseok betrayed him but he stayed loyal to his best friend, you're not sure if punching him would solve anything. Maybe it would even make Jungkook feel worse knowing he punched his good friend, whether he hurt him or not. It's not really Hoseok's fault for not knowing about Kiko's pregnancy.

You know it's stupid but you also don't want him to do something stupid because of how he feels. And before Jungkook can deliver a good and hard punch to Hoseok's shocked face, you're standing between them yelling at Jungkook to stop. The last thing you see is Jungkook's big shocked eyes as you close your eyes in reflex, opening them and finding his arm in the air stopping at the right time.

One second you see his life flash in front of his eyes and the next he's frowning that slowly turns into anger. "What thefuck are you doing? I could've fucking hit you!"

He sounds panicked, genuinely angry that you'd throw yourself like that between them, risking the chance of getting hit by Jungkook. He would never be able to forgive himself for that if that happened. You're stupid for doing that, you realize your mistake but it's important he stopped and hasn't hit anyone. That's a win, right?

"Jungkook stop, just let him get her things..." you plead with him, features softening as Jungkook drops his arm but rubs his eyes.

Taking his hands, you give them a good squeeze and one look in his eyes. He's glancing between your eyes, shifting his gaze quickly before he sighs. With one movement he turns around and starts walking to the couch where he sits, elbows already leaning against his knees as he grabs the back of his head.

The view pains you and glancing at Hoseok, he watches Jungkook with the same look before he looks at you.

"That was stupid, you know? You could've gotten punched." he says softly, silent 'thank you' lingering in his brown soft eyes.

"We all do stupid things, don't we?" you shrug, lightly chuckling as he tries to imitate a form of smile that comes out sad, the last thing he does before walking to Jungkook's bathroom.

Jungkook must've collected all Kiko's things when he was going back and forth between his room and bathroom, leaving you sipping on the tea while trying to distract yourself by watching some movie on his Netflix account. That's probably what he was doing when you heard clicking and rummaging because Hoseok comes out of the bathroom in a minute, holding a cosmetic bag with a few things in his hands too.

He does the same thing in the bathroom, coming out with a bigger shopping bag that Jungkook usually takes with him while doing a bigger grocery shopping. It must've taken a lot for Jungkook to search for her things and put them in one place for her.

Accompanying Hoseok to the front door, he looks disappointed and sad from not being able to say goodbye to Jungkook because he still holds his head in his hands, clearly not wanting to talk. It was painful to watch Hoseok open his mouth and then close it when he saw Jungkook in the same position.

"She has been going to therapy ever since she..." Hoseok reveals and trails off quietly, causing Jungkook to scoff.

"Is that my fault?" he asks bitterly. He's going to need one thanks to her too, he thinks.

Hoseok glances at you, giving you a saddened look once again as he shakes his head. "No, it's not... I'm just telling you that she's been suffering too, even though she is the one who made a decision."

Jungkook doesn't move, not sparing him a glance which Hoseok takes as his cue.

As Hoseok bids you a soft and quiet goodbye, you do the same thing and release breath as soon as the door clicks closed. Walking to Jungkook, you join him on the couch and put an arm over his shoulders while your head leans against his.

"Is he gone?"

"Yeah," you sigh, "He's gone."

You don't tell Jungkook it wouldn't be smart to hit Hoseok, as much as he thinks he deserves it. You don't even tell him how sorry you are because he knows and there's no need to say that. So you stay quiet, leaning back with him until you both fall asleep in one of the most uncomfortable positions and wake up with cranked necks and throbbing neck and shoulders pain.

You don't go to clubs often.

Scratch that. You try not to go to clubs often but with a friend like Taehyung, it's bound to visit them at least once in a while, usually when he drags you not really giving you a choice. The blasting music that's been invading your ears for the past hour is a perfect example of that.

However, you're not the one who's been dragged here involuntarily, although you've never wanted to come here in the first place. Not that you don't like this club, not at all. This has to be the club where you feel the most comfortable in and it definitely has to do something with you working here before. After all, it's been only a month since you stopped working here and finally saved up enough money for a better car. Something you hadn't failed to mention to Jungkook at one of your attempts of checking on him and barging inside his apartment. You had talked a lot during that time, tried to update him with the littlest thing that has happened in your life.

Speaking of Jungkook, he's been tonight's victim of Taehyung's doing but surprisingly, he agreed to a proposed dinner when the first message from Taehyung suggested it in the morning. You should've known he had something up his sleeve when he suggested club before you could even finish your meal. So you got separated, changed your clothes and then met up again.

And here you are.

Tracing your finger around the rim of your glass, your gaze falls upon your best friend standing at the bar, getting hit on again. Slim and tall blonde woman is standing next to him, flashing him with a pretty smile that you can't see but can probably imagine here and there. You've lost count of those women. This is maybe third? Not that it would matter anyway, you kind of feel bad for him though. He looks uninterested but still polite enough to not turn her down, since she's obviously still standing there and batting her eyelashes at him.

Poor Jungkook, all he went for is another round of drinks but he's been standing there for the past fifteen minutes talking to her. You can see he's still not feeling himself, even though he agreed to come here and you get an idea it has something to do with what happened yesterday with Hoseok.

"Don't even say it,"

You look at Taehyung who sits down next to you, flashing you with a boxy grin when your eyes flicker to the mark on his neck that he hasn't cared enough to cover. Yes, Mr. "I'm going to use the restroom", sure. Was it the redhead he danced or the small petite woman he chatted with at a bar? Or with Taehyung, it could've been someone completely different.

"This is a bad idea, that's what you're thinking right? It's written all over your face." Taehyung runs his finger in front of your face to prove your point as you roll your eyes at him.

"I'm not saying this is a bad idea," you point out, earning a glance from Taehyung with his brow raised. "I'm surprised Jungkook agreed to come here and I'm actually glad he finally hangs out with us outside of his apartment,"

All of that is true.

Taehyung always thinks whenever someone has their issues, the best thing to solve is to loosen up but you're not entirely sure if getting drunk is the right way to solve any of this.

Jungkook has been down, that's for sure but at least he starts to communicate more and he even laughs at Taehyung's and Jimin's attempts of trying to make him laugh, or even when they're not even trying but are just being themselves. He is better, but he's still that same broken person that experienced a massive pain of loss and heartbreak. That doesn't just go away, not even in months despite you can see a little bit of progress on his part. Who knows what Jungkook isn't sharing with any of you, no matter how many times he has assured you that he is fine. You all are worried about him, you all just have a different approach to it.

"We just don't know how he'll be if he gets drunk. Have you thought about that?"

Of course, Jungkook is an adult and you don't have to watch over him as if he is a kid. You know Jungkook used to drink alcohol to help himself to sleep, he told you he's not doing that anymore but is it really true?

Taehyung considers your words, thinking about them for a moment before he sighs and places his arm around your shoulders. "I don't know either," he admits, "But at least we will be here for him?" he asks in a thought which you nod but sigh nevertheless.

"That's not the point, Tae... purposely trying to bring him to a club and getting him drunk just sounds and seems stupid." You give him a look, knowing exactly how he ushered everyone to take a shot as soon as you stepped into the club.

And of course there's a high chance all of you will drink. You're in a freaking club! It's almost as if you're asking for alcohol if you decide to spend your Saturday in a club.

"Hey, now! I tried my best!" Taehyung exclaims, shining you with his boxy grin in his usual playful mode.

You're not quite sure if Taehyung truly understands what worries you but you decide to leave it be. Jungkook can do whatever he wants and as his friend, you're worried about him but there's not much you can do. He's definitely aware of what Jungkook is going through, but he also never experienced any heartbreak to begin with. Taehyung's way of thinking is different as well and maybe to a certain extent, he's right.

Jungkook is finally out of his apartment hanging out with you without any of you having to come to his apartment uninvited. That's progress. But is the club really the greatest place to bring him into? You're not sure about that.

"And who knows, maybe he'll meet someone else here today. Or just have fun with someone," Taehyung shrugs, while your eyes almost fall out of their sockets from how casually he says it.

Is he seriously hinting at what you're thinking?

"He just had his heart broken," you point out, meeting Taehyung's eyes. "Besides he's not the type to have one night stands."

That's true, all of you know it so the chance of that happening tonight is not big. And for a moment you seem to be a little bit shocked at that thought, worried Jungkook will turn into someone he's not because of what happened to him.

"Well, I didn't think he was the type to fuck his best friend and look at you!"

Mouth falling open, you shrug and punch Taehyung in the shoulder while he doesn't seem bothered at all at how blunt he is. He shrugs, grinning at you and before any of you can say something, your two other friends finally join you with new and fresh drinks. From Taehyung's comment, you automatically reach for your drink ignoring his smug face from the corner of your eyes.

"I had to save our Jungkookie," Jimin laughs, squeezing Jungkook's shoulder who's sitting on the opposite side of the table from you.

"Women just wouldn't leave him alone."

"Are we surprised? Look at him!"

Taehyung is right.

One look at Jungkook and you understand the attention he's getting from women, which isn't that much of a surprise because people turn after him all the time.

The funniest thing is that Jungkook has put almost zero effort into his outfit. Just a casual black button up and jeans can be considered as effortless, right? But still, he's pulling it off because everything he's wearing at the moment compliments his body proportions, showing his hard work at the gym and his fit body. His hair is parted in the middle, kind of the only way to style his hair since it's long. You've caught him pulling off a man-bun a few times, but he only wears it to get the hair out of his face which occasionally happens when he's at home, working or working out like he told you once you complimented his longer hair, scolding him when he told you he's thinking about getting it cut back to short since apparently, the long hair is nuisance.

Your own outfit is nothing too crazy and you haven't put that much effort into it either. Just one of your short sleeved tight dresses which you usually wear during summer times in the daylight. It's definitely not the sexiest and prettiest outfit you've worn when partying, but it hugs your body nicely and it's comfortable. That's all that matters. Your hair is in a tight ponytail, showing off your features and cheekbones even more with the casual makeup you had done for the day and the accessories that are your small round earrings and necklace sitting between your collarbones adds a little bit more effort to your already normal and nothing special outfit.

The night feels weird and the only people in the mood for partying are Taehyung and Jimin. And when the conversation finally averts in a different direction, leaving Jungkook alone and the attention he's getting, you relax and start to enjoy your never ending drinks.

Drunk Taehyung is stupid.

You've no idea what that man thought when he brought a foreign woman into your shared booth, playing a wingman to the poor Jungkook who had seemed clueless for the first minute. That has changed when Taehyung didn't forget to mention she's a photographer just like Jungkook, ushering her to sit next to him and show him her photos.

At first, you couldn't imagine her as a photographer. She is pretty though, obviously knows how to dress up and do her make-up. More on the petite side but her gift from God in the form of perky and bigger breasts are hard to miss. Brown eyes and a nice smile, she seemed a little bit shy at first but as soon as Jungkook noticed it (and maybe her discomfort as well since Taehyung wouldn't keep an eye off their interaction), she relaxed.

"This is not my attempt to get him to hook-up with someone," he tells you as Jungkook shows her his own photos, causing her to gush at his talent that you know very well.

All of you do.

You flick him off on his forehead when he gets too close, the alcohol causing you to cringe while he doesn't look mad and blinds you with a grin.

"I think it'd be good for him to meet someone and talk to someone, uh, new. Other than you, no offense."

"Thanks," you mutter through your glare, "Whatever that's supposed to mean."

You wish Jimin was here, he disappeared once again saying he has to use the restroom. How much has this man drunk? If he was here, he'd surely have your back and tell Taehyung his idea is stupid.

"It means," he points out with nose held high, "You're getting old, sweetheart,"

He is crazy.

You stare at him confusingly with brows furrowed so much that your eyebrows start to hurt.

"The two of you are a lost cause, so it's better Jungkook starts to meet new people, women or whatever he prefers. You know, dips his toes here and there."

"You mean dipping something else..." you mutter, ignoring Taehyung's laugh.

"True, true," he purses his lips, "But no, he can do whatever he wants. He doesn't have to dip anything in--"

"You're so wasted, man," you cut him off, rubbing your forehead. "I'm gonna get myself another drink because I can't stand your drunk ass at the moment."

"Oh, can you get me one too?"

"No, you've had enough. Maybe try bubblegum." You move past him, silently laughing at the loud gasp that can be heard even through the music.

Taehyung's loud voice is the last thing you hear coming from the booth as you make it to the bar.

"Rude!"

"She seemed nice," Jimin comments, scooting closer to Jungkook who looks confused for a while but that's very short lived when he notices Jimin's eyes flickering to Ester who's already disappearing in the crowd.

"How do you know? You weren't even here," Jungkook mutters loudly enough for him to hear, grabbing his drink and taking a long sip from it.

"Taehyung told me, I met him on my way here."

Of course, he did.

He left shortly after you but not before giving a very "subtle" wink to him, clearly hinting at Ester. Which reminds him he has no idea where you went because before he could ask Taehyung, he used the opportunity to leave him alone. He's not stupid, Taehyung is never subtle when it comes to everything. He's like an open book and Jungkook is very aware of Taehyung's doing.

He had to admit. It was nice to talk to someone that doesn't know what he's been through. There was no pity in her brown eyes when she was talking to him. She was nice, not hitting on him like Taehyung may have expected.

He's not sure if he's ever going to see her again, but he does follow her Instagram account. They followed each other as soon as they started discussing photography and all the things his friends don't really understand. You're usually interested, so you ask and Jungkook explains whatever you're interested in, but it's different to talk about it with someone who truly knows these things.

It felt new... and fresh.

"Where were you anyway?" he asks, arching a brow at Jimin and his frequent disappearance throughout the night.

His friend scans Jungkook's face for a moment, long enough to leave Jungkook wondering even more but then he just shrugs. "Just needed some air. I'm not feeling it tonight."

That is not something you usually hear Jimin to say when it comes to clubbing. Although, he's not as wild as Taehyung is and there were times when Jimin simply wasn't feeling it, just like he called it. Very rare times though.

"Any of us is," Jungkook says," Maybe except Taehyung."

"Yeah, I guess we all have our reasons," Jimin shrugs, "But I'm glad you're here, Kook. Maybe it's not fun as usual but it's nice to finally hang out with you."

Outside of his apartment with a grim atmosphere, he means.

"Yeah, I guess it was time for me to try and enjoy myself more. I can't handle Y/N looking at me as if I'm a kicked puppy she needs to constantly check on." he chuckles.

He doesn't mean it badly. He knows you're worried about him, just like you would be if that happened to any of them. He hoped that agreeing to come here tonight would ease your nerves but judging from the look of it, you're not really in the mood to be clubbing too. Which reminds him all over again where the hell did you go. It's not smart of you to go alone, even though you're inside. None of that matters when men are pigs inside or outside of the club.

On the other side, Jimin understands what Jungkook means and nods along with his words.

"Well, I think she needs to loosen up too. She's been having a hard time with the landlord after all, which is understandable..."

"Wait, what?"

You're having a hard time? Landlord? What the hell is Jimin talking about? This definitely sounds like news to him.

"You don't know?" Jimin looks even more shocked.

He'd think Jungkook was the first person you told to but clearly he's not.

"Her contract is ending in two months and apparently the owner's daughter is moving in there, so he wouldn't extend her contract. It happened unexpectedly and the landlord has been apologizing, at least he's feeling shitty about it but yeah, she's in a very fucked up situation right now."

Jungkook stares at his drink barely blinking as he lets the news sink in. He has so many questions but it seems that even though Jimin knows way more about it, he doesn't know any further details.

"What is she going to do?"

"I don't know, the last time I asked her she told me she'll have to look for another apartment."

"But she bought her own furniture there and she has lived there for two years—they can't do that to her."

Jimin's features soften, shrugging because he knows what Jungkook is feeling right now. Frustration, that's what he felt too when you told him the news, almost breaking in tears from the frustration, anger and sadness.

"I told her she can crash at my place but you know what she's like..."

Eyeing the barman's back, you wish he would just do your drink quickly before anyone tries to take their move on you, so you can join your friends. He must be new, you think. You've never seen him here.

You've spotted Mark once and minus the faint greeting you both had at the beginning of the night, you haven't seen him since then or talked to him.

Almost jumping at the body brushing against your shoulder as someone sits next to you, you're instantly met with a set of dark brown eyes you've grown familiar with over the years. Well, you've to admit you feel happy to see him here and him bringing a feeling of safety with him.

"You've a trouble with your landlord?"

You're speechless for a second, shaking yourself off from the momentary surprise by letting out a sigh. "Who told you?" you ask, glancing away at the barman before you look back at him. "Jimin or Tae?"

"They both know?" Jungkook sounds surprised, noticing the look of guilt on your face. It's okay, he's not mad at you or something. He's just surprised you haven't told him about your trouble, despite you've been filling him in with every possible detail of your life for the past two months.

It just feels weird that you suddenly left such important information. Something you told Jimin and Taehyung but not to him.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asks softly, leaning his elbows against the bar but he keeps his eyes on you.

"I didn't want to worry you..." you answer, "It's not like I didn't want to tell you, but you've been dealing with your own shit and I guess--it's not even that important."

"Like hell it's not," Jungkook exclaims, "It is important. Just because I'm dealing with my own shit doesn't mean I can't deal with yours too,"

That makes both of you laugh a little but you shake your head, not really knowing how to justify your decision of not telling him other than what you've just told him. You'd tell him eventually. You've been searching for a new car as well, something Jungkook told you he's going to help you with but that was way before the biggest bomb dropped on him and had a massive impact on him.

"What are you going to do?"

You're not sure if this is the greatest topic to talk about while On The Floor by Jennifer Lopez is playing, but you've no problem talking about this with Jungkook.

"I've started to look for different apartments, something where I can move in quickly since my contract is ending in two months, actually, shorter than that... I found this nice apartment, it's not as nice as the one I have but it'll do. I have to live somewhere, the rent is a little bit cheaper but I can definitely see why."

The photos on the internet you found doesn't look very good but it seems like a decent place to live in. Maybe until you'll figure out something different. The apartment you live in at the moment has a great location, it had been definitely a bargain when you found it and had been able to move in.

However, there are far worse looking apartments and this one isn't even that bad. It's just that you got used to the one you live in right now and it'll be tough to say goodbye to it. You wish you could be mad at the owner, which you were for the first two weeks, but you also understand that he followed the contract and basically has done nothing wrong.

He has a daughter and she's going to use that apartment, maybe she needs it and like a father, he's helping her.

"Is it that bad?"

"It's not," you wave your hand, "Just not as nice as my current apartment. Plus, it's in Dobong."

"Dobong?" Jungkook's eyes widened, "But that's almost on the other side where you live now."

You chuckle at his reaction because yes, you're very aware. "I know..."

"Y/N, that's so far away from here. What about your work?"

"I'd have to travel? Or maybe they can move me somewhere closer? I don't know, Jungkook." you murmur, growing frustrated all over again at the thought because you clearly haven't figured it out yet.

Jungkook's questions are just reality, reminding you that you don't have much time before you have to make a decision. Not that you've much of a choice.

"But you're gonna be away from us... from me... from Tae and Jimin."

When he says it like that, simply pointing it out but with saddened eyes, you feel like crying because the thought of being away from your friends and all alone scares you more than you'd like to admit. Over the years, you've grown independent, more than you ever were and you're proud of yourself because of that. But not having them close like you're having them right now (and even now, you don't exactly live super close but the distance isn't that huge) makes you want to cry out from the frustration.

"Don't say it like that," you whisper, looking at your lap. "I don't really have a choice. Other apartments are expensive as fuck, I can't afford it Kook. The prices went high and they go high every year. It's hard to find a good and affordable apartment in Seoul."

Jungkook turns to you on the bar stool, hooking a finger under your chin making you look at you. "We'll think of something, okay? You're not leaving me."

You chuckle at his bunny grin and wiggling brows, suddenly pouting causing Jungkook to grab you by your shoulders as he brings you closer to him, giving you the hug you desperately need.

He smells so nice. You take a whiff, cheeks pressed against his shoulder and enjoy a few seconds before you've to pull apart because the barman finally brings you your drink.

"Let's not think about it for tonight, yeah?" he proposes, "Let's enjoy this night. No bad thoughts. No Kiko,"

Your eyes shoot up to his at the mention of her but Jungkook just offers you a grin. "No apartment problem. Just us having fun, okay?"

"Sounds good," you tell him, taking a sip from your drink. "Where's your new friend, by the way?"

"Who?" Jungkook looks confused, a realization hitting him right after. "Ah, you mean Ester. Our paths have divided."

"She was pretty." you comment, watching Jungkook's reaction as he stares at you quietly.

"Are you on it with Taehyung?" He eyes you suspiciously.

"What? No!" you exclaim, refuting his assumption right away. "I told him it's a stupid idea."

"It is," Jungkook hums, grabbing your drink and taking a sip from it, frowning for a moment as he nods at the sweet taste. "If I wanted to hook-up with some woman, I could easily do that on my own. I don't need Taehyung's help."

Laughing, you nod. "Yeah, you probably could."

"Probably?" Jungkook scoffs playfully, causing you to giggle. "All Taehyung can think about is sex, he thinks that solves everything."

"Maybe not everything, but he definitely thinks it solves everything temporarily," you point out which Jungkook agrees with, "Besides, all men think about is sex all the time."

"Hm, I can see your point," Jungkook purses his lips, "But sometimes it's hard not to think about sex when there's a beautiful woman."

You look up at him from your drink, finding him staring at you causing you to almost choke on the liquid as you clear your throat, putting down the glass as you arch your brow at him shamelessly. "Are you subtly flirting with me, Jeon?"

"Do you want me to?"

Fuck, this man is shameless sometimes.

Do you want him to?

The butterflies coming alive in your stomach are most likely a good answer for that. But it's very dangerous, no matter how exciting and good it feels.

But then Jungkook bursts out laughing, scrunching his nose at your face as you slap his shoulder, frowning annoyingly at your drink. "Dickhead."

"Hey now," Jungkook playfully frowns, "Come on, finish your drink and let's dance."

You're not sure if any physical contact with Jungkook is a good idea right now, especially when you feel your heart picking up its pace and the sight of Jungkook brushing fingers through his hair isn't helping at all.

"Why?" Trying to find a way to get yourself out of this, even though the thought of dancing with Jungkook is tempting and it's been a while since you had fun with him in a form of dance. "Why don't you go find Erica and dance with her? I'll sit here and cheer you on!"

You propose lightly and innocently, although devilish glint in your eyes as you look up at him, lips wrapped around the rim of your glass causing Jungkook to frown.

"Her name is Ester," And you want to roll your eyes, and what? "And I'd much rather dance with you."

Fucking Jungkook and his mouth for letting such words come out. His honesty, no matter how it sounds when you think about what he just said now, your head spins. You're not drunk, the drinks you've been drinking are low percentage alcohol but you feel slightly relaxed from it. And it's dangerous because your mind already wanders into places it shouldn't have.

So you do what you know the best and you start whining, masking your panicked heartbeat and mind. "I'll look like an idiot next to you!" And you mean it in more ways than just one.

First of all, you're not drunk enough to feel confident to dance with him. It's not just silly dancing you do at home or more private parties. The clubs are big and there are drunk people everywhere and you doubt everyone will have their eyes on you, but still. Jungkook is already like a magnet for eyes.

"That's not true," Jungkook disagrees, grabbing your wrist gently as he shakes it a little. "Just one dance, then. Please."

And he pouts, widening his eyes just like he knows – in that innocent and cute way that makes you shut your eyes as you let out a loud groan, knowing you've lost. "Okay, but I'm gonna finish my drink and you're going to have one too."

He sits back like an obedient student, flashing you with a bunny grin.

"Deal."

Jungkook's convincing skills are good, just not as good as yours. Finishing your drink meant two more and Jungkook's one drink turned into three, all thanks to your pleading eyes and shameless begging and Jungkook's soft spot for you.

"You're trying to get out of this, you still owe me one dance." Jungkook has told you when the barman placed the second round for the two of you.

"The night is still young, Jeon, relax." you've told him in return, sending him a grin with your glass in the air in a silent and yet another cheers.

You've to admit, as much as dancing with Jungkook sounds exciting, talking to him like nothing bad is happening in your lives feels refreshing and you wish the reality wouldn't get to you tomorrow morning. Or ever.

But it seems some things get to you sooner or later.

It's the time when your bladder lets you know you've to really use the restroom, no matter how much fun you're having with Jungkook and mindlessly planning your friend's summer vacation. Jungkook laughs when you excuse yourself, admitting you're ten seconds from peeing yourself and he turns around in his chair towards the dance floor, having a perfect view of the restroom in case somebody would bother you.

The gesture is sweet and you can't hide the little grin on your lips when your eyes meet, before you really usher to the restroom. Once you're done, bladder empty and hands cold from the water, you're completely thrown off when someone calls your name just a few meters away from you.

Voice you haven't heard in months but remember perfectly despite your short relationship.

Haneul walking towards you with soft eyes makes your heart skip a beat, but not in the good and exciting way but quite the opposite. You're too shocked to see him right here, in front of you looking just like you remember him because there's barely a change in his appearance. He looks good, very similar to what he looked like when you first met him. Black leather jacket, jeans and some shirt under his jacket, it's like some weird deja vu happening right now and you've to blink a few times to convince yourself he's real.

"Hi," he says as he stops, offering you a hesitant smile which you don't return because you're too busy staring at him as your brows slowly scrunch into frown. "I just spotted you and wanted to say hi. Don't worry, I've no bad intentions."

He better not because you're not scared to deal with him. But one look at him and his soft features, you start to feel guilty for being in a slightly panicked and careful mode. It's not like you've a reason to be scared of him. You broke up and even though the memory of your last conversation still slightly hurts, you've no hatred feelings towards him. You wish him well and you really think he's not a bad person.

"Well... hi, then." you mutter, mentally slapping yourself. It's more than clear you've no idea how to react to him and to Haneul, you look weirded out by his sudden approach to you.

"I don't want you to think I stalk you..." he says, glancing at his feet in embarrassment.

"Why did you come to the club I worked at?" Hence the past tense that doesn't go missed by Haneul and you see surprise and curiosity cross his features but he doesn't have the guts to ask.

"My friends wanted to come here. Listen, I can leave if I make you uncomfortable." he says simply, offering you a shrug that means he won't be mad if you tell him you don't want him here.

Which is stupid because he's free to visit whatever places he wants to. Your break-up wasn't that bad to the point you couldn't be able to be with him in the same room. It is weird he's here, knowing you met here and you still worked here just a month ago. There is a high chance he knew you could be here and if he really wanted to avoid seeing you, he wouldn't come here whether his friends wanted him to or not.

But that's kind of selfish and you're overthinking things once again. Maybe it's not that dramatic.

"No, stay," you tell him, "I'm just surprised to see you again..."

It's polite to ask how he is but you're not sure if you want to have a friendly conversation with him. You've come to the terms that it's best not to keep him in your life and even a simple conversation is not necessary in your opinion. You moved on and you hope he did as well.

"Okay," he murmurs, "I--enjoy your night."

And with that, he turns around and leaves. You watch him long enough to see his friends in the background as he joins them, but before you can watch any further or any possible stares his friends could give you, you're already walking to the bar.

Jungkook is still there, not noticing you right away as his eyes stay attached to the dance floor while his fingers drum against the bar stool to the catchy music. "Oh, you're here!" he exclaims, briefly lisping from how quickly he says it.

He doesn't give you any time to react, already standing up as he leads you to the dance floor, tossing you a handsome grin over his shoulders. Realizing you've no chance, you deduce you feel tipsy enough to allow yourself to loosen up, even with Jungkook's close proximity and hands on your hips and yours on his biceps.

Jungkook's one dance never ends with one dance and when Jungkook wants to dance, he has to be in a good mood which you think is an amazing change. The alcohol flows freely in your body, the last three drinks you recordly gulp down causing everything to feel numb.

Everything besides Jungkook's hands.

You like the feeling of freedom the alcohol brings you. Overthinking is left somewhere else, letting you enjoy every second and touch of this. What in your more sober state you wouldn't appreciate about it though, is the lack of control you're having over your own thoughts and needs.

It's a hard task to stay unaffected and you're failing miserably, feeling your insides tingle with excitement that you thought is long gone but it's proved only Jungkook can make it come to life. You're both still tipsy which is good because it means none of you is drunk. Tipsy enough to want to get even closer to Jungkook which is freaking stupid, because he's already close enough as it is.

Your back pressed against his chest, ass brushing against his crotch and the zip of his jeans doing the same thing here and there seems like a big deal. You're selfish, because instead of putting some distance between your dancing and slowly getting sweaty bodies, your arm stays outstretched behind you, hand holding the back of his head and fingers buried in those dark locks of his. The other arm is holding the one of his hands that's on your hip.

Jungkook's warm breath hitting the crook of your neck causing you to shudder – shudder out of excitement and Jungkook himself.

You know you've lost. It's too late to end this – at least that's what you tell yourself because you don't want to end this. You wish he'd just lean down and press those lips onto your neck like he knows you love. You wish you could feel his hard dick and it's embarrassing how wet it feels between your thighs, even though his bulge is nowhere in its full hard-on state.

God, you're fucked. And tipsy. And horny.

And fucking stupid because when you shamelessly grind your ass against Jungkook, there's no chance it looks like an accident. If you could turn around and look at him, you'd see him biting his lower lip.

His hands squeeze your hips, almost the same way they did when he was balls deep inside you. Fuck, you forgot how that feels and you're ashamed to be even thinking this. It's not right. He's going through a break-up, no matter how many weeks have passed and you're best friends. The deal ended a long time ago, so what the fuck are you doing?

Jungkook's lips brush against your jaw, nose nudging it right after as you whimper, thankfully the sound gets masked by the loud music and bass that vibrate through your body. Everything is hazy, just not Jungkook.

"Are you trying to make me hard?" he asks lowly, almost amusingly and he sounds so hot that you've a urge to turn around and kiss him, just because he's close and you're fucking horny thanks to him.

Get a grip, Y/N, don't do a fucking mistake just because you're tipsy and haven't had sex since December. You went without sex longer than this, so why the fuck are you getting so desperate?

"Is it working?" you ask breathlessly, loudly for him to hear and you want to mentally slap yourself, but the temptation and excitement are holding the upper hand here.

"I'm trying not to get hard," Jungkook points out, the same low and deep tone as if he's telling you the deepest secret. "Don't start something you can't finish."

And that spurs you on even more, accepting the challenge as you turn around, staring right into Jungkook's dark and very much awake eyes. He has a lazy grin on his lips, living for the fire in your eyes and you're not sure if it's whether he's amused by all of this or if he's feeling it too.

"You out of people should know I never start something I can't finish,"

Hinting at something that hasn't been talked about for a very long time, because you both came to conclusion it haven't affected negatively your friendship and you're still the two best friends you've been, Jungkook's features darken and it's unbelievable you can see it even through the shitty club lightning.

Hands brushing against his chest, you slowly brush them down against his toned abs that you can feel through his button-up, causing you to bite off the gasp that wants to get out. He's definitely much buffer than the last time you got to properly touch him like this.

"Did you forget?"

There's the boost of confidence growing inside you, very much thanks to the alcohol and probably hormones that are making you do and say all these crazy things.

Jungkook chuckles, the corner of his lips lifting in a smirk as if he sees right through you. Can he see how much he tempts you? Is it just one of those times you're teasing each other but are very close to playing with fire? You're not sure, but you're enjoying the thrill his eyes bring to you as they stare at you, crinkling at the ends while his hand touches a few restless baby hair and strands that got messy and slipped from your ponytail.

"You out of all people should know I never forget,"

Breath hitching, it takes you a moment to release a giggle and you've no idea why you're suddenly giggling, maybe it's mostly the way he wiggles his brows – something he does frequently when he's just fooling around.

"Shut up," you tell him, making him laugh while you watch him throw his head back a little before he's looking at you with a wide grin. "I need to use the restroom."

"Again?" he asks teasingly, causing you to roll your eyes as you take a step back from him, letting your body calm down – at least trying for it.

"You," you tell him loudly, a grin spreading on your lips as you slowly back away. "Are dangerous, Jeon."

Turning around and silently giggling, you don't hear Jungkook's next words that are practically impossible for you to hear because he mutters it amusingly and the loud music definitely helps as well.

"So are you, Y/L/N..."

The reflection in the mirror you see as you wash your hands and finally look up to check your appearance is almost fascinating. Fascinating, because you almost don't recognize yourself – you look different. Face flushed, there's a thin coat of sweat layered on your skin and maybe it's the make-up slowly melting off, but what catches your attention the most are your wide sparkly eyes.

Jungkook still affects you and wishing you could be angry at him for it, your heart starts excitedly jumping instead at the memory of you on the dancefloor. You're not sure what the two of you are doing, if you're just fooling around and having fun or there are deeper undertones of your teasing and subtle flirting. Is it flirting? You and Jungkook would often fool around and tease each other which to some, it'd look like flirting. It's confusing and even you can't tell which one happened just a few minutes ago, but all you know is that it felt nice and exciting.

When two girls barge into the restroom giggling, drunkenly stumbling into one of the toilets, you shake yourself out of your daze and finish washing your hands in a hot water that almost burns your skin but you're too distracted to care. Messily drying them with a paper towel, you get out of there with a plan of joining Jungkook once again.

However, you're stopped by a body you bump into around the corner and the quick apology is once again on your lips, but you stop as you're met with a familiar pair of eyes. You realize there's a small percentage the whole bumping incident is a pure incident. Haenul's not surprised and apologetic eyes say it all, causing you to sigh.

"What do you want?"

You don't sound cold and rude, just exhausted. You're having a good time, after a long time, and you don't need to deal with any of this right now.

Haneul might've not planned to literally bump into you, but he has been waiting for you to get out of the restroom ever since he saw you coming there. You see his eyes slightly wide, the hint of alcohol tracing his soft features and even though he's hovering over you with his tall figure, he looks small but confident enough to face you.

"I just wanted to talk... Do you have a minute?" he asks, reaching for your arm as he gently grabs your forearm and tugs you away from the group of guys drunkenly joining the dancefloor.

Shaking his hand off, you frown, not letting yourself get soft by his attentive gesture of you not getting tossed around like a toy because of some drunk guys who don't care about anyone around them.

"Haneul, I thought we talked about this..." you sigh, telling him loud enough because you'd like to avoid repeating yourself.

"Please, just hear me out and I'll leave you alone, for real," he pleads with you, causing you to motion for him to continue.

Did he see you with Jungkook? You completely forgot about him being in this club. You're not sure if Jungkook or alcohol is to blame. Or maybe it's you, you probably should've been more considerate about Haneul still being here. But still, you're broken up and it's not like you've done anything wrong. You shouldn't feel guilty about this.

"I know I apologized before but I--I miss you so much,"

Wait, is this where he starts to beg you for a second chance?

Before you get to ask, he's already continuing.

"I can't believe I hurt you like that--I don't know why I'm telling you this, I don't know why I felt the need to talk to you again but I just saw you--"

He's drunk. Drunker than you thought he was.

He gets closer and you're stuck in your spot, unable to react properly as he strokes your cheek. All you can do is stare at him. Mentally screaming at yourself to react somehow, you're frozen while letting him touch you. He steps closer, hovering over you even more as his lips are close to your cheek to the point you can feel his warmth.

"We both have a reason to be mad at each other," he murmurs, "But I miss you so much... I wish I could kiss you, even if it's the last time."

The truth is that even though you're not physically or verbally reacting, you're having a whole inner mental battle going on. Do you want this? Do you want him to be this close to you? He's here talking about missing and kissing you, how do you feel about it? You're tipsy and horny, something that is because of Jungkook (the second part at least) and in your current state, you wonder what you even want. What do you even think about this?

Your thoughts are going slow and Haneul keeps talking, talking about how much he misses you and he really thinks he loves you despite the last words you told him when you broke up with him. Too much is going on you and you scream at yourself to wake the fuck up, especially when Haneul angles your head up towards him, eyes staring at your lips hungrily as he dives in for a mentioned kiss.

One second he's too close and your hand is up to stop him, to push his chest and tell him that he's drunk and not thinking straight. But someone beats you to it, although it's not as gentle as you'd do it because Haneul is yanked backwards that he almost stumbles and falls but someone grabs him again and pushes him to the wall.

Jungkook's eyes are filled with fire, not the kind you had minutes ago with him, but pure anger is in them as he grabs Haneul by his collar. Jungkook is quick, too quick for your liking and you've no idea what possessed him, but he's already lifting up his fist at Haneul who tries to pry Jungkook's hands off him but he's too strong.

Yanking the back of Jungkook's button-up, you yell his name. "What the hell, Jungkook?!"

"You think you can jump at her whenever you want, huh? Is that it? Who the fuck you think you are?!"

He holds his fist in the air but doesn't punch him, not yet.

Haneul is not making it any easier for himself though, looking at Jungkook with spite in his dark and drunk eyes. "Of course, you're here too." he mumbles choked up, thanks to Jungkook's harsh grip on his collar.

Oh, so he didn't see you with him.

"You're going to get us kicked out, Jungkook, let him go!" you snap at Jungkook, yanking his button-up again as you reach for his lift first and try to put it down with your full strength.

And he does. Not right away but once he looks at you and sees the fury in your eyes, he releases him but not before he scoffs at him. Jungkook saved the day once again, but the approach he chose is not very likable to you. There are people glancing your way, despite the bad lightning and loud music, the interaction has gained attention of some people and it's just a matter of time before one of the bouncers walks up to you and kicks you out.

"He wouldn't leave you alone!" Jungkook exclaims as if you're not realizing that Haneul was getting too close to you without you giving him consent.

And that's true, you realize that you don't want to kiss Haneul. You don't want to be close to him and you wonder if you would be stupid enough to let him do that because you're horny and slightly tipsy, which you're not sure if it's true anymore because this whole interaction has pretty much sobered you up.

"So you will start punching everyone?!" you exclaim.

Jungkook looks stunned for a second, as if he can't believe you just indirectly pointed at what happened with Hoseok the other day. And then he shakes himself out of it, sighing when he realizes that you're right.

He's never been aggressive. And he has a few slip-ups (three to be exact) but that doesn't define him. One was quite understandable. Haneul, the very person who's still leaning against the wall with a glare sending Jungkook, who slut-shamed you, got punched by Jungkook. Two, was Jungkook almost punching Hoseok because his friend kept his unborn baby a secret and betrayed him in ways he never expected. And now.

Almost punching Haneul again because he threw himself at you, in hope you would probably make-out with him and maybe leave this club together.

However, you don't understand why Jungkook has suddenly gotten so physical over something that could've been dealt with more silently and less violent.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles, taking a step back but doesn't leave your side as Haneul eyes him and then his eyes flicker to yours but all you can do is glare at him, reminding you that he's still here.

"You're drunk," you tell him, "Come on..." you direct your words to Jungkook this time, reaching for his hand and he does look surprised at your touch, but lets you hold his hand as you lead him away.

Not sure where you're going, you realize you're outside once the cold air hits your face but you don't pay attention to that feeling, finally taking a deep breath while you let go of Jungkook's hand and walk a few meters away from the entrance and people coming in or out.

"I'm sorry," Jungkook says again, joining you in your little spot while he stays standing next to you while you lean your back against the brick wall. "I don't know why I wanted to punch him..."

"I think you know," you tell him silently, appreciating the sounds of cars passing by and muffled music that isn't as long as it was inside. "You're sensitive and letting your frustration get the best of you."

"I didn't want you to see me like that," he admits, sighing in disappointment at himself which makes you look at him, finding him staring at the cars while you're met with the side of his profile.

His eyes sparkle at the streetlights in the nighttime, making him look even more innocent despite his massive and tall figure. Once again, he looks kind of vulnerable. Not because he feels sad over Kiko or anything else, but simply because he seems to be sorry that you had to see that.

"I just saw him cornering you--"

"I should've react, I was in a shock and I'm glad you made it there before I could've made a mistake,"

Jungkook's eyebrows twist into frown at your confession. He thought you don't feel anything for Haneul and you're past that relationship, nothing else.

"I guess I was too distracted from--"

Me and you dancing, you think but keep your mouth shut as you give Jungkook a knowing look, which you're not sure if he understands because he simply watches you.

"We had fun and then he came--he was drunk, I don't think he'd ever approach me like that if he was sober. I bumped into him earlier and he was fine, just said hi and left me alone."

"Yeah, alcohol does wonders."

Yeah, it does. You chuckle at that.

Jungkook steps closer, stopping right in front of you as he's hovering a similar way Haneul was a few minutes ago. But the difference is that Jungkook's close proximity makes you feel safe, comfortable and excited at the same time. The familiar burn in your stomach comes alive again, the little remains of alcohol in your stomach making you feel drowsy again but you know the truth is somewhere else. You can't put it on alcohol when you barely feel it in your system.

"Are you okay?" he asks, leaning down to check your face closer as you keep your mouth shut, gulping as you stare into his dark orbs that look concerned.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" you breathe out, nibbling onto your bottom lip, unaware of your self-conscious doing until Jungkook stares down at your lips. His eyes jump between your lips and eyes, checking you as you feel the sudden need to touch him.

The need to push some of his hair from his eyes, to have your fingers wrapped in them again like that time when you were dancing. Bodies close, hands on your hips and ass pressed against his groin area... fuck--

"Are you sure you're okay?" he asks, tilting his head innocently as you open your mouth to say something, but nothing comes out of your mouth. "Do you want to head home or go back inside?"

All you know is that you don't want to go home and be left alone. You realize you want to stay with Jungkook, preferably turn back time and be back on the dance floor with him close to you. Enjoy the last minutes, even without something you've been silently craving for all of a sudden. You've no idea what's wrong with you. Is this how super horny people feel? Is this how men think with their penises? Is this how women think with their vaginas?

"Do you want to go home?"

Jungkook chuckles and looks away for a moment amusingly, and maybe a little annoyed that you can't simply answer and ask him a question back instead.

"If you're going home, then I'm going home too." he answers simply, giving you an answer which makes you nod.

"One dance and then we can go? What do you say?" you ask, anticipation in your eyes as Jungkook simply nods and motions his head towards the entrance.

"Okay, let's go... it's cold out here anyway and we should find Jimin and Tae to tell them we're leaving soon."

You almost complain, knowing Taehyung would most likely hold you hostage, so the two of you can stay longer but you stop, knowing as long as you've Jungkook with you, he'll take care of it. And Taehyung.

Jungkook leads you straight towards the dancefloor, his hand finding yours as soon as you make it inside as he holds you close to him. Somewhere in the distance you see Taehyung making out with a woman, the sight not that unfamiliar and you see Jimin chatting up close to him with another woman. If you paid more attention, maybe you'd have noticed how Jimin and the woman stare at the pair next to them amusingly – which means the two women are friends. But all of that goes unnoticed as you get them out of your sight, Jungkook's back and tattooed hand holding yours being the main attraction for your eyes.

Not even a minute on the dancefloor and you naturally find your way back to yourselves, in a similar position like before. Ignoring the way the one part of you mentally chants that yes, you might've not turned back time but this is even better, because Jungkook's hands are all over you again and so are yours, wrapped in his hair like you wanted them meanwhile the other hand holds the nape of his neck. His mouth brushes against your cheek and you shiver, whimpering how good it feels but it's not good enough.

"Jungkook," you mutter into the air but it's almost impossible for him to hear you through the music, but once you turn your head slightly to look him in the eyes, you're met with the sight of his lips again.

You tilt your head back a little, finally seeing those dark orbs that watch you attentively, hands not leaving you. Shameless and fucking brave is what you are, but it's not like you can't really control yourself (at least it seems that way) because your eyes find their way to Jungkook's lips again. Wanting to cry out of frustration, you know your body longs for something else and your rushed breaths are one of the first indicators for it.

And then you grab the back of Jungkook's hand, inching his face even closer. You wait for him to pull away or at least give you a reaction that would say this is not what he wants. You would be fucking embarassed if that happened, but maybe it would be for the better.

However, he lets you and just stares at you, almost as if he's challenging you to take the first step. Does he want this too?

Does he feel the need to kiss you just like you do?

He probably feels something because he would pull away if he didn't, you try to think rationally.

Surprisingly, you take the first step and nudge his nose with your own, bodies stopping but not inching further away from each other. It's like a huge throwback once again, this time involving all the affectionate kisses and the thing you always did, almost hesitating before you finally kissed. You wonder if Jungkook remembers it, if he knows exactly what you wish for and if he's remembered of all of those times he has done it to you.

And finally (maybe unfortunately) your lips slightly touch but it's not a kiss, they just briefly brush against each other as if both of you are testing the waters, wondering where your bodies and secret temptation will take you.

Growing annoyed and frustrated, you're ready to groan because there's something holding you back and you hate that at the moment but as always, Jungkook saves the day and with a little bit of force forward, he lets his lips meet yours for the first time in a long time.

In a time you thought would never come because you were past all of that.

Maybe this is a stupid thrilling decision but you can't bring yourself to think about it, nor curse yourself for it because oh, Jungkook's lips feel amazing and you feel like whimpering or cry out of pure satisfaction. They're soft just as you remember, maybe even softer and suddenly, it feels like nothing has changed and you're back to last year's summer. Letting yourselves to be free, not thinking about consequences and just enjoying each other's presence.

It's hard to think about everything else when Jungkook's warm lips are on your own, and it's funny how the only thing you manage to do is to take another step and start moving your lips against his own, now truly kissing him. He kisses you right back, moaning when you tug his hair and his palm spreads against your stomach, holding you close against his toned and strong chest.

You don't even care, you probably look like one of those nasty couples that make out in public. This even tops all your wet dreams you've shamefully had about Jungkook. Because the difference is that this is real.

The first swipe of his tongue sends an electrifying jolt all over your body, your thighs pressing together as you try to relieve the tension between them. Kissing until you're gasping for oxygen, the weird smell of people and sweat filling your nose almost making you puke, you peck his lips one last time before you lick your bottom lip.

"Take me home, Jungkook."

He's surprised, you can see it the way his brows shoot up a little and uncertainty framing his eyes by your simple yet shocking request, but he gives you a nod which you mentally sigh in relief. Your request is simple, yet holds various meanings that maybe you're not even sure of.

On the way out, Jungkook orders for a cab through an app and informs you that he has sent a message to Jimin and Taehyung into the group, informing them that he's taking you home. Even that simple sentence makes butterflies shoot straight into your stomach and even though you're not promising yourself more than you can carry, you enjoy the feeling as long as it lasts. You're not sure what you're particularly excited about because the moment you and Jungkook get into that cab, you're not sure what happens next.

And the uncertainty makes you nervous, but Jungkook's hand in yours and the way he unconsciously holds it tight makes it all better.

By the time you're walking out of the club hand in hand, the cab is already waiting for you and as Jungkook holds the door of the cab for you, he shoots you a soft smile that makes everything uneasy go away. It's cliché but you can't believe that it works, because all you're left is that same excitement again.

As the driver makes sure Jungkook gave him the right address, he looks at you questionably because it's not like he put his address because he expects anything from this. It's because his address was added automatically and he didn't give that much thought into it when he was trying to get you through the crowd. But you give him a sheepish grin and cuddle up to him, leaning your head against his shoulder which causes Jungkook to confirm the address.

Jungkook doesn't touch you more than it's necessarily though, his hand stays respectively on your knee and doesn't go any further, while you're gripping his biceps and can't help the stupid grin you hope he doesn't see.

The ride to Jungkook's apartment building is short but feels like a big journey because by the time the driver stops in front of it, you're ready to jump out of the car the second he slows down the vehicle. Just like when you were getting into the car, Jungkook holds the door for you and helps you get out of it, thanking the driver before he shuts the door and hurries to the warmth of the building.

Following Jungkook into his apartment seems kind of funny because you've been here so often, that you'd be able to find the way while being blindfolded. Yet, you're staying a little behind him following him as if you were clueless where he's taking you.

Once Jungkook unlocks his apartment and the doors are shut with you inside, you're already taking your shoes.

"Listen--"

You don't, you're too quick and sorry that you've cut him off which hasn't been done purposely. By the time Jungkook has tried to tell you something, you've already kissed him. Realizing what you've done, you pull away with a sheepish grin and hot cheeks.

"Hm?" you ask cutely, hands innocently behind you as Jungkook's eyes darken and he's the one who pulls you closer and kisses you.

Giggling into the kiss, you realize you can taste the slightest hint of Jungkook's drink he has drunk at the club. But oddly, he tastes like him. His cologne and the flowery smell he always holds fill your nostrils more than ever, now that you're in a place that's not filled with body odors. You're hypnotized, that's how you're feeling when you tug him towards the living room with mouth still on his.

The only time you let your mouth detach is when you push him down on the couch, happy when he successfully lands onto his butt with legs spread out. He's so hot, button-up slightly crinkled from your heavy making out and your needy hands. His hair is messy as he's looking up at you from his sitting position through hooded eyes, causing you to drop to your knees right away.

His eyes widen for a moment, but you don't stare into them long enough as you're leaning towards his lips to kiss him again. No words exchanged, your needy hands unbutton a few buttons on his shirt, exposing more skin and the chest that got definitely bigger than the last time you saw him. And he's not even fully naked. He's so much broader and you're trying hard not to literally salivate.

His hands land on your hips as you start peppering kisses to his jaw, slowly down his neck and then chest. The single touch of his hands makes you almost moan out and even though the lust clouds your mind, you're not greedy for an orgasm or him making you feel good. He's already making you feel good just by being there, holding your hips – and it's silly but you can't explain it.

You reach for his belt, unbuckling it eagerly and you're surprised how easy it's going despite your quick movements. Jungkook helps you by lifting his hips off the couch, getting the jeans past his butt but once you touch the hem of his boxers, eyes too distracted by the hard bulge already poking through the thin material, Jungkook mutters your name.

It's like he finally realizes what you're about to do, what position and situation you're both in and he looks almost nervous, despite his hooded eyes filled with lust.

"I don't want you to think you're my distraction,"

Your features soften and you get out of your lusted state for a moment, hands placed over Jungkook's knees instead.

"You're not, I would never do that to you."

It hasn't even crossed your mind that he could use you as a distraction. At least not until he has just mentioned it. If he wanted a distraction, he could've gone home with anyone else. Women have been giving him a good piece (and well deserved) attention. And why Jungkook has decided to go home with you, no matter how random and quick it happened, is beyond you.

"I know," you assure him softly, straightening yourself as you once again lean towards him and gently peck his lips. "Don't think too much about this. If you don't want this, let's just stop it."

Some tiny part of you whines at that, but you know it needs to be said and you really don't want to make any mistake. You know you'll be overplaying this in your head once it ends, no matter how it ends but just for now, you want to enjoy this. It's not like you're doing this for the first time. You already know each other. You know each other's bodies and even though it's been a while, nothing has changed much. Minus Jungkook's huge body growth.

"I do want it," Jungkook admits by mumbling, "I'm just not sure if it's right or wrong."

Well, his hard dick probably wants to argue about that but you're both trying to be adults here. Some failing and some trying to be.

"It's just a blowjob, Jeon," you chuckle, pointing out and silently telling him that it doesn't have to be anymore dramatic. "So," you start, "Do you want it or not?"

He stares at you, longer than you wish him to because it suddenly starts to make you more nervous. And fuck, Jungkook imagines you with his cock in your mouth and randomly gets a flashback of that time when you sucked him off for the first time. In the very same position and room, at the beginning of your deal as Jungkook wanted to make sure it's not something you have to do just to please him. But you were so eager, similarly to what you look like now but there's something different about you. There's a boost of confidence because you've already had him in your mouth, at least that's what he guesses, and he would be an idiot to miss out the opportunity to miss the warmth of your mouth when you're on your knees, staring at him like this.

And maybe, Jungkook's mind is clouded just like yours.

"Pull me out," he says simply, your breath hitching how soft yet dominating he sounds.

Just as you gave him the green light, he left the worry somewhere else and turned into the Jungkook that can have you squeezing your thighs and make you wet by a single demand and sentence.

And you couldn't wait for it.

Eagerly and excitedly, you hook up your fingers under the hem of his boxers just like you've done before, getting even more excited at the sight of his cock again. Boxers joining his jeans pooled around his ankles, his cock springs free and slaps against his stomach right away. The sudden moment surprises you even though you were waiting for it, but you're way more excited to not only get your eyes on it but your mouth and hands too.

Impatiently, you reach for him and wrap your hand around the hard length, you admire the hard and warm flesh. Its red head is asking for attention and the little veins peeking from its soft skin makes you lick your lips once again.

And Jungkook can control himself, he finds the most fun watching you which makes him even more hard (if that's even possible), so when you squeeze him he keeps it quiet and bites into his lip instead. It feels good but it's definitely not enough to let him fully dive into the pleasure. There's a little bit of pre-cum already pooling at the tip of his cock and he knows you see it because your eyes widen in excitement, making you look cute. He can't believe he just thought of you as cute while his cock is in your hand.

There's no time for him to chuckle at his thoughts because you're already enveloping the tip into the warmth of your mouth and fuck... he swears he can see starts because you taste him for the first time in months, the time he thought would have never come. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he's trying to process what's happening right now but it's very hard, especially when you suck him off before you dive even more and start to take more of him every time.

He lets out a pleased sigh, one hand gripped in a fist while the other finds the back of your head, keeping you in place as the sucking sounds resounds from your mouth. It's wet and you drool all over his cock which makes things even more hotter, his head falling back as his mouth stays open while he enjoys your mouth on him and you between his legs.

You're careful, always coming for air whenever you feel like gagging and the rest that you can't fit (or not pressuring yourself to make it fit), is held by your hand as you squeeze him here and there. You're changing your movements, licking him up and down before you suck him, then you're bobbing your head up and down while doing the rest with your hand. And the ultimate spot for him is when you suddenly press his cock against his stomach, licking his balls as you suck on them too. Fuck, you're too good at this. Just like he remembers.

It's like you remember every little spot he has and that's when you're starting to hear soft moans and groans leaving his opened mouth. His thighs are tense, your nails digging into the skin there. His cock barely fits into your mouth but you get creative, opening your mouth as wide as you can at the cost of you drooling all over his cock down to his balls. The button-up that's slightly hiked up unfortunately hides the little trail of hair that goes down to his pubic hair and you wonder if you'll have another chance to see it some other time. This is most likely just a one time thing but you quickly throw that thought away, not wanting to think about the future and what's going to happen.

"Fuck," Jungkook groans, the thighs tensing up and hips slightly bucking up are letting you know he's close because even his grip on your hair gets tighter. Moaning around him, you feel your jaw ache from being opened for a longer time to the point it starts to get uncomfortable, but you don't care and continue sucking him off.

The wet sounds of your mouth that has never left makes Jungkook's head spin and his eyes are pinched close, suddenly remembering what a sight he's missing. So, he raises his head and pries his eyes open just to see you. But the not clearest sight of you doesn't satisfy him enough because he's mostly met with the top of your head.

"Look at me," he demands, voice rough and strained as you obey, looking up at him through your lashes which makes him let out a hitched moan. Something, you're not sure you've ever heard from him before.

"Fuck--I'm coming," he informs you hurriedly, the other hand reaching for your jaw as he cups it. "Where do you want it?"

Obviously, you're not risking answering him verbally because you'd probably rob him from a good orgasm. Fortunately, Jungkook doesn't really wait for a verbal one as he stares at you with a clenched jaw and hooded eyes.

"Your mouth?" he asks and you hum around him, a soft and muffled 'Uhm' by his cock resounds from your mouth. "You're gonna swallow like a good girl? Like you always did?"

Fuck, pleasure shoots through your entire body at his words and you eagerly hum, sucking him harder but keeping the same pace, not wanting to ruin anything.

Jungkook holds his stare as long as his body allows him to, even as he groans and the first ropes of cum shoot out of his tip straight into your mouth. You keep just the tip in, sucking on it while swallowing every drop which makes him shut his eyes and letting himself to release until the very last drop. Some of it comes out slowly after some time but you swallow everything, peppering a last kiss to his tip before you fully pull him out of your mouth and pull away from his softening cock.

He pries his eyes open, reality hitting him and he wonders if you already regret it when he sees you already standing. But then you give him a smile, just a casual smile as if you haven't had his cock inside your mouth just a few seconds ago.

"Mind if I stay over tonight?" you ask casually, leaving him speechless as he sits there, leaned against his couch with his cock still out that glistens from your saliva.

"Yeah, sure," he manages to say.

"Great!" you call out, turning around making your way towards the bathroom but not before you go into his bedroom, pulling one of his t-shirts you know very well.

Jungkook stays there until he hears the shower door close and the water dripping down, hitting the tiles and most likely (definitely) your naked body.

#bts angst #bts smut #bts au #bts fluff #jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #jungkook fanfic #mutual help #personasintro

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genericpuff · 3 months ago

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holy crap okay so

I'm two episodes into Kaos

normally I keep my expectations pretty minimal because, let's be real, the Internet - and especially Tumblr - has a tendency to severely overhype new series to be way better than they actually are and it often leaves me sitting there like "that's it? that's what people were freaking out over for weeks?? that was just a bunch of cheap ships and tropes that i've seen 123785902380 times before" LMAO

BUT thankfully compared to other series like Hazbin Hotel and The Amazing Digital Circus, I haven't been worn out on excessive fandom exposure prior to watching Kaos, so I didn't really know what to expect going in besides what folks have told me so far - it's a modern-day Greek epic, and it stars Jeff Goldblum as Zeus (which is, unsurprisingly, peak casting).

That said, I'm very pleased to say that so far, the show is absolutely blowing me away. The set designs, characterizations, weaving of all the players into a central narrative led by a very coy narrator, all of it feels both refreshing and respectful to the source material at the same time.

so uh yeah that LO animated TV show... we have reason to believe now that it's gotten picked up by Amazon Prime, at least according to the showrunner's LinkedIn and posting history from February of this year that seems to imply LO may have been picked up by Amazon-

(but still, nothing's really been confirmed because they're being so tight-lipped about this you'd almost think it's because there isn't a show happening at all cough)

But even then, that means at best we still won't see anything of the LO TV show adaption for another 2-3 years, depending on how production goes.

Why am I talking about LO right now? Well it should be obvious - Kaos double-whammied LO by beating it to the punch at its own game.

I mean, just look at the creative choices alone in the design of the Underworld and its rulers, our beloved Hades and Persephone.

And yes, the entire Underworld is color-graded like this, something so simple and yet effective in communicating the nature of the Underworld and what it stands for - a place where the past lives on through the dead, paused in time, devoid of the vibrant color grading found in Olympus - or "Olympia" as its been named in this retelling - which is, by the way, a visual treat to take in every time it's featured.

(and yes, that is S-tier-companion Billie Piper on the left, but I will not tell you who she's playing, you actually really should go into this show as blind as possible for the thrill of figuring out these characters as they're introduced <3)

That's not even getting into the narrative structure of the plot itself or the phenomenal casting and acting, but again, I don't want to spoil too much as the show is quite new, and I want to actually finish watching the show myself before I get more into the details of its story and how it delivers it (I'm very much hoping I will still be singing this show's praises at the end of its 8 episodes, please for the love of god don't jump the shark, I don't think my heart can take that kind of pain again.)

All that's to say though, Kaos is, so far, exactly what us disappointed fans of LO deserve after all these years, and frankly, I feel like whatever is coming for the LO animated TV show is really gonna have to step up to the plate to both live up to the bar that Kaos has set as well as stand on its own without being affiliated as a cheap Amazon knockoff living in its shadow. Sounds a little familiar and a bit ironic, doesn't it?

#kaos #kaos show #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #lo critical

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loulovingho · 3 months ago

Note

prompt: something where buck and tommy argue over gerrard. like, buck doesn't know how tommy could have been so passive, and tommy's like way over that version of himself or something. I know a lot of people don't want that to happen in the show, and I get it, but I'd like a fic version!

“I have never, in all my life, dealt with someone so- so... so evil!” Buck was pacing back and forth in Tommy's living room, just as he'd been for the last half hour since he arrived.

“Really, Evan? Never?”

“You don't understand, Tommy. Gerrard is, it's like he's targeting me, but not in a bad way.”

“There's a good way to be targeted?” Tommy asked from his spot on the couch.

Buck sighed, placing his hands on his hips. “It's like he- he wants us to be buddies, ya know? He thinks I'll be his puppy or something. H- He's treating everyone else like garbage except for me and it makes me feel really weird. He took me golfing, Tommy. Golfing.”

“You fit his ideal firefighter, Babe. He needs minions, he's gonna latch onto you.”

“What do you mean his ideal firefighter? What even is that?”

“White, strong, straight,” Tommy replied simply.

Buck raised an eyebrow. “What we did yesterday morning was very not straight.”

“Yeah, but does he know that?”

“Does he know what we did yesterday morning?”

Tommy tilted his head. “Evan.”

Finally, Buck plopped down on the couch, staring toward the blank TV. “I figured he knew after we went to the medal ceremony together.”

“It's not like we made out in front of the crowd. For all he knows, we're friends.”

Buck was silent for a moment. “I've never really talked about my personal life with him,” he admitted. “Didn't really want to. N- Not because I'm ashamed or anything,” he added quickly, looking at Tommy with wide eyes. “I'm not. I promise, I- I'm not ashamed.”

“I know, Evan.” Tommy reached over and gave Buck's hand a squeeze. “You're a very good ally.”

He glared at Tommy. “I'll never live that down, will I?”

“Nope.”

Buck grew quiet again, and Tommy was beginning to think the conversation was over.

Then Buck, barely above a whisper, said, “I don't want him to think we're just friends.”

“It's fine if he does,” Tommy replied. “I don't mind. Probably best that way, honestly.”

Buck's eyebrows furrowed. He turned more toward Tommy, his back leaning against the armrest. “What do you mean?”

Tommy contemplated his words before speaking. “Listen, I'm not telling you to be buddy-buddy with the guy. I definitely do not recommend that. I'm also not saying to turn a blind eye to all the crap he pulls. But, why make it harder on yourself?”

“Because it's living a lie, Tommy.”

“It's not lying if you just don't mention it.”

Buck huffed out a breath. “You want me to hide who I am? I distinctly remember that being the reason our first date ended so abruptly.”

Tommy let out a deep breath. “I'm not saying to hide, Evan. And that's not exactly the reason our date ended, you know that. I'm saying if there's been no reason to bring it up so far, why bring it up now? What he thinks about you doesn't matter.”

“It matters to me.”

Tommy squeezed his eyes shut, trying to rid himself of the growing frustration. “So, what? You wanna walk into Gerrard's office and say 'Hey, I'm bisexual by the way. Also, I'm dating that Tommy guy you worked with years ago. You know, the one you made fun of when you saw him at the medal ceremony?' You really think that's the best thing to do?”

“It's better than being his puppet like y-” Buck cut himself off abruptly.

“Like me?” Tommy finished. “That's what you were gonna say, isn't it?”

“Tommy, I-”

“It's true,” he continued with a shrug. “I was his puppet. I did whatever he wanted me to do and I didn't question it. Even after he was going to let me die in that explosion, I still stuck by his side. I don't deny that part of my life, Evan.”

“I wasn't trying t-”

“You know I apologized for all of that well over a decade ago, right? I feel like I remember us talking about that.”

“W- We did.”

“And I would never want or expect you to be who I was. You know that?”

“I know, Tommy, I-”

“And I'd never ask you to hide yourself, because I did that too and-”

“If you'd let me finish a damn sentence,” Buck snapped.

Tommy stopped, stared at Buck with pursed lips. A silent go ahead.

“I don't- I didn't. I... Ugh, Tommy!”

A pause, then. “That's what you needed to let out?”

“God, you're being so annoying right now!” Buck could feel his body getting hot.

“No, I'm trying to stop you from getting needlessly harassed at work.”

“By essentially cutting off a part of myself every time I'm there!”

“Evan, if your sexuality hasn't come up by now I don't see a reason why it ever would! It's not cutting off a part of yourself, it's just existing!”

“But I- I'm getting special treatment because he doesn't think that part exists,” Buck tried to explain. “I don't want to be his right hand man, Tommy. That might've worked for you but it doesn't work for me.” The words came out harsher than he intended. He knew it was a low blow to bring up something from so long ago, something long dead and buried. But Tommy had made him upset, and he needed to make Tommy upset too.

Except Tommy didn't get upset. He got quiet.

Somehow, that was worse.

A tension so thick you could cut it with a knife filled the air.

After what felt like an eternity, Tommy stood, letting out a sigh. “I'll be back,” he said, beginning to walk out of the living room.

“What- Where are you going?” Buck nearly shot out of his seat. “Are you leaving?”

Tommy turned back to him. “First of all, my house,” he said, motioning around the room. “Second, I'm going into the kitchen to get a drink.”

“Well, I- do you want me to leave?”

“I didn't say that, Evan. I mean, I'm not gonna block the exit if you wanna go, but I prefer to finish the arguments I get involved in.”

Buck sat back down. “Then I'm staying.”

“Good. You want water or something?”

Buck folded his arms over his chest. “With ice.”

“Okay.”

A couple of minutes later, Tommy returned with two cups of water in his hand. He held Buck's out to him, Buck taking it with a low, “Thank you.”

“Mhm.” They both took a few sips, then Buck stared down at the ice in his cup until Tommy started talking again. “You're not wrong,” he said. “Being his right hand man did work for me for a long time. It's not something I'm proud of, and I don't make excuses for it, but I also don't really appreciate it being thrown up in my face.”

Buck set his glass on the coffee table. “That wasn't fair of me, I- I know that. I was just angry. I'm sorry.”

“I probably should have tried explaining myself a bit better,” Tommy replied. “I'm sorry too.” He set his own cup down, then held his arm out toward Buck. “Will you come here?”

Buck didn't hesitate to move into Tommy's space. He curled up next to him, resting his head on Tommy's chest while Tommy wrapped him in his arms. “I can't help wanting to protect you, Evan,” Tommy said, pressing a kiss to Buck's head. “I know you don't need it, and I know it's selfish, but the idea of you getting harassed by that man for any reason, it- it scares me. I have,” he let out a humorless laugh, “I have never been as brave as you. I still feel nauseous every time I see the guy. But I never want you to feel like I want you to hide yourself, or that I want you to be like me. That's not what I meant.”

Buck ran his hand slowly up and down Tommy's chest. “I know. I- I get it. I've never dealt with a Gerrard before, not directly. Didn't think I'd ever have to.”

Tommy hummed. He ran his fingers through Buck's hair. “I will back whatever decision you make,” he assured him. “Whether you tell him or you don't, I am right beside you. I never want you to think I'm not.”

Buck propped himself up enough to be able to look at Tommy. “I know you are,” he replied, bringing a hand to Tommy's face. He stroked his thumb along Tommy's cheek, then leaned up for a kiss. “That's why I love you.”

Tommy sucked in a breath. His heart began to race. They'd never said those words before. Honestly, Tommy had stopped himself a few times, figuring it was way too soon.

But, as always, Evan burst through every door Tommy had locked up in his mind.

“I love you too, Evan,” he replied, and he hoped Evan could feel just how much he meant those words.

But, in case he couldn't, Tommy pulled him in for another, deeper kiss. Holding him close and tight while he wished they could stay right here in this moment for the rest of their lives.

When they finally separated for some air, Buck sat up straighter. “I'm going to tell him,” he said without an ounce of fear or hesitation. “Maybe not the way you suggested, but I... I want him to know I'm yours, and your mine, and screw whatever he has to say about it.”

And God, if Tommy thought he couldn't love this man anymore than he already did, there went Evan proving him wrong.

He nodded. “Okay.” He brought Buck's hand to his lips, pressed a kiss against his knuckles. “I'm with you. I love you.”

Buck smiled, wrapping himself up in Tommy once again. “I love you more.”

#bucktommy #911 #tommy kinard #evan buckley #lets count how many times i have tommy say 'evan'#no please don't im scared #also a little obsessed with the way he says it don't look at me #also somehow this turned into first i love you's #which wasn't the initial intention it just sort of happened oops #anyway sorry for my ramble! hope this was okay!

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bkdk-bylerthings · 19 days ago

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UPDATED THIS POST GO READ THE END I ADDED MORE I MISSED BEFORE

They gave us SUCH A BIG BYLER HINT in the reel that @/strangerthingstv posted on instagram today popping off with the celebration of stranger things day

Let me explain, I might be reaching with the first part of this but you never know

Credit to @pixidivine for posting about two of the frames which made me go back and rewatch the reel to analyze it more.

First part I want to talk about is Dustin asking Mike and Lucas if they are both seriously this Dense. When he says: “this dense” it lands on Mike and stays on Mike till he is done talking then goes to Lucas making Mike the subject of this.

This could mean Mike being clueless to his own feelings for Will or in season 4 of him being clueless about the lying coming from Will and that that Will likes him.

Second part, where I got the idea from which is shown in the reel RIGHT AFTER THE DENSE COMMENT:

Nancy asking Mike if the way he’s been acting was because of Will then we have Joyce saying “Ring a ding ding” like the sound of bells going off when something is correct. ‼️

They did this on purpose, because with these videos promoting a movie/TV series/anything they take clips of different scenes to put together to make a cohesive sentence so it makes sense to the subject of what the video is talking about, which in this case it’s about ST day and Rewatching ST on ST day…but is it??

That leads to my next part which is this:

There is a double meaning here that most people won’t think about.

Obviously we have the 1st part talking about the special day which is ST day, then we have Mike saying “what’s exciting about this” then Joyce says: “just watch”

Interesting because we already know ST is exciting and a good show, so good point Michael what is exciting about ST day? Hmmm HINTS and NEW N E W INFO—we don’t have to rewatch it to know that it’s an exciting show. What is exciting is what they give us in the reel, Joyce saying “Just watch” is a double meaning the front meaning MEANING to rewatch the show, the hidden meaning is to JUST WATCH THE REEL

Which gives us THE BYLER HINT RIGHT AFTER THAT ‼️ I find it interesting that all the words throughout this reel are about ST and watching it and how exciting it is but the Will comment???? That’s totally out of place!!

The order of these frames so it makes more sense, u can also just watch the video to understand what I’m trying to say:

1 “Is a very special day”

2 “It’s ST day”

3 “what’s exciting about this?”

4 “just watch”

EDIT: (4.5) “Why?”

5 “are you both seriously”

6 “this dense”

7 “I thought it was bc of will”

8 “Ring a ding ding

EDIT bc I totally missed this in the reel too omg— ok here we have a frame of El asking “why” after Joyce says “just watch”

(And maybe an interesting hint to actually go watch the 1st episode bc byler was there all along)

This is even more questioning!! Right after we get Mike’s Questioning!! It makes you want to think again, like didn’t Joyce answer Mike already with a “Just watch” why is El now asking

After “why” is THEN when we gets Dustin’s “are you both seriously this Dense”

Which is LITERALLY asking WHY THE DOUBLE QUESTION, WHY is this reel and what is the reel actually trying to tell us

Then ofc after “this dense” It’s like They give us an answer to all the questions:

“I thought it was Because of Will”

Omg so after two asks, Dustin being fed up with what ur not understanding, we get a answer

“Ring a ding ding” 🤯

GO BACK TO THE FIRST EP, AND WHY??? EL ASKS?? WHY IS DUSTIN FED UP??

THEY GIVE US THE ANSWER WHY TO WATCH IT AGAIN OMG

(Sry guys I’m back tracking on my theory holy shit)

THE ANSWER WAS “I thought it was bc of will”

WHICH IS DIRECTED AT MIKEEEE

“RING A DING DING”

*slams paper on table that reads ‘byler is real’*

#byler #stranger things #miwi #mike wheeler is gay #mike wheeler #anti milkvan #byler endgame #i’m going insane #im dululu #im tweaking #going crazy #crazy together #will x mike #mike x will #omg???

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solelifauna · 1 month ago

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Definitely NOT Invincible (Yandere Invincible & Reader)

Pt.3

When depression hits hard.

Later that day, you and your friends gathered at the usual spot behind the school—an old, forgotten storage shed that had become your makeshift meeting place. It was secluded enough to keep your conversations private, and right now, privacy was exactly what you needed.

You all sat in a circle, the air heavy with unspoken tension. The reunion earlier had been emotional, a moment of pure relief in the chaos, but now reality was crashing down on all of you. The weight of the situation pressed on your shoulders as you faced your friends, each of them looking as shaken as you felt.

“How the hell are we going to do this?” Hallie muttered, running her hands through her hair in frustration. “We have to stop the world from being taken over, fight off Demogorgons, and—” she gestured wildly, “go to school like nothing’s wrong? My mom’s already noticed I’m acting different. I’ve barely been back a day, and she’s asking questions.”

You winced. Hallie had always been the one who had a close relationship with her family, and hiding things from them wouldn’t be easy. If her mom was already suspicious, it was only a matter of time before she started digging deeper. “What did you tell her?” you asked quietly, dreading the answer.

“I told her I wasn’t sleeping well, which, I mean, isn’t a lie.” Hallie sighed. “But it’s more than that, you know? She can tell something’s off. I can’t just pretend everything’s fine. I’m… different. We all are.”

Connor, who had been sitting silently up until now, finally spoke up, his voice shaky. “My family knows something’s wrong too,” he said, staring down at his hands. “I had a full-blown panic attack yesterday when I heard explosions on the TV. It was just a show my brothers were watching, but… I freaked out. My parents had to spend half an hour calming me down and coaxing me out from under the table.”

His face was pale as he recalled the moment, and you could see his hands trembling slightly. The trauma of being in an active warzone, of watching the world fall apart, had left scars that none of you could hide. It wasn’t just the physical scars from fighting; it was the emotional ones, the kind that didn’t heal easily.

You all exchanged grim looks. None of you had really considered just how hard it would be to hide what you’d been through. Surviving in an apocalyptic world, facing death at the hands of the people who were supposed to protect you, and then actually dying—it was too much. Too much to carry, and now you were back, thrust into your old lives, expected to pretend like none of it had happened.

“I guess we didn’t think about the trauma,” Weston murmured, breaking the silence. “It’s not like we didn’t deal with it before… I mean, fighting Demogorgons wasn’t exactly easy on any of us, mentally or physically.”

He was right. In your previous life, the constant battles with Demogorgons had already left you scarred. You’d all had nightmares, sleepless nights, and moments of pure terror even back then. But now? Now there was another level of horror you had to contend with. The memory of your skull being crushed by your own father, the feel of death creeping in—it wasn’t something you could just shake off.

“And now we have even more to deal with,” You said grimly. “It’s not just the Demogorgons. We have to stop Omni-Man and Invincible from taking over the world. How the hell are we supposed to do that while we’re still dealing with all of this?”

You didn’t have an answer. No one did.

“It’s not fair,” Weston muttered, and all eyes turned to him. “Why does everything always fall on us to solve? We’re just kids! Freshmen in high school, for crying out loud! We should be–I don’t know, playing, going to parties, worrying about homework and who’s crushing on who.” He laughed bitterly, shaking his head. “Instead, we’re stuck trying to save the world, fighting monsters, and keeping it together so our families don’t figure out we’ve been dead. It’s not fair.”

His words hung in the air, the truth of them sinking into everyone’s minds. It wasn’t fair. Not in the slightest. You were all supposed to be worried about grades and fitting in, not about war, apocalypse, and death.

You sighed, nodding in agreement. “You’re right. It’s not fair. None of this is. But we don’t have a choice.”

“We never really did, did we?” Hallie said quietly. “Even before this—before all the time travel and Viltrumite stuff—fighting Demogorgons wasn’t exactly a normal kid thing.”

You sighed. He had a point. None of you had ever really been kids, not for a long time. While everyone else your age had been worried about tests and dances, you were out there fighting for your life, battling creatures that no one else even knew existed. The things you had seen, the things you had done—no child should have had to face that. You hadn’t felt like a kid in years.

“Feels like we never got to just be kids,” Connor murmured, his voice strained. “We’re always the ones stuck with the impossible. Every time, it’s on us to fix everything.”

You bit your lip, the anger inside you simmering. It was like the universe had decided to heap every impossible task on your shoulders, expecting you to carry the weight of the world while everyone else went on living their normal lives, oblivious. And now, even with the chance to live again, to be back in time, it still wasn’t really your life, was it? Not with everything you knew.

You were forced to be soldiers in a war that hadn’t even started yet, while everyone else was blissfully unaware of the destruction to come.

“I’m just tired,” you admitted, your voice softening, the exhaustion you felt finally bubbling to the surface. “We should’ve gotten to feel normal, at least for a little while.”

The group fell silent, the truth of your words settling in. No one argued with you because they all felt it too. The unfairness of it all was suffocating. None of you had been kids in a long time, even though, by all rights, you should’ve been. Life had robbed you of that, forcing you into roles you never should have had to take on.

“But,” you said, swallowing the lump in your throat, “it doesn’t matter how tired we are. We don’t have the luxury of being kids anymore, do we?”

Hallie looked down at her feet, her lips pressed into a thin line. “We haven’t been kids for a while.”

You nodded, looking around at your friends—your teammates, your family. “And I guess we’re never going to be. So we have to handle this the way we always do.”

“We fight,” Weston said quietly, but with conviction.

“Yeah,” Connor agreed, though there was a distant, haunted look in his eyes. “We fight.”

It wasn’t fair. It never had been. But deep down, you knew you didn’t have a choice. You’d survived worse before, and now you had a second chance. As much as you wished things could be different, the reality was clear. The world needed saving, and once again, it was up to you to do it.

The conversation eventually shifted from emotions to logistics. You all knew what needed to be done, but the how of it was trickier. “We need to tip off the Guardians,” you said, glancing at your friends, who nodded grimly in agreement. “The sooner they know what’s coming, the better.”

Hallie bit her lip, thinking it over. “But it can’t come back to us,” she said, her voice firm. “If the government finds out it was us, we’re screwed. They’ll lock us down, probably treat us like we’re a threat or something.”

Weston nodded, his brow furrowed. “Yeah, and if Omni-Man and Invincible find out…” He didn’t need to finish that sentence. You all knew what would happen. If your father and brother found out you were behind the warning, they’d kill you without hesitation. You couldn’t afford to be sloppy about this.

“So we’re agreed then,” Connor said quietly. “No one can know it’s us. We have to figure out a way to warn the Guardians without leaving a trace. But… how?”

You all sat in silence for a moment, the question hanging in the air like a dark cloud. It wasn’t just about warning the Guardians—it was about doing it in a way that kept all of you safe. There were so many risks, so many things that could go wrong. You’d have to plan carefully, every detail accounted for.

“We’ll figure it out,” you said, though you didn’t sound nearly as confident as you wanted to. “We just… need more time. We can’t afford to mess this up.”

Hallie sighed. “Yeah. But we can’t wait too long, either. The Guardians don’t have much time. We don’t have much time.”

Connor let out a shaky breath. “We’ll come up with something. We always do.”

The conversation continued for a little while longer, but there were no concrete solutions yet. The weight of everything was heavy, and the longer you talked, the more overwhelming it felt. Finally, you all came to an agreement—you’d figure out the details later. Right now, it was getting late, and school was looming over you like a grim reminder of the double life you had to live.

You hated it. The thought of going back to school, pretending everything was fine, acting normal when nothing was normal anymore. But for now, that’s what you had to do.

With another emotional goodbye, none of you really ready to leave each other, you finally parted ways. It was always hard to say goodbye these days, even though you knew you’d see each other the next day. Still, after everything you’d been through, every goodbye felt a little too final.

As you made your way home, the cool night air helped clear your mind a bit. But as you approached your house, you glanced at the time on your phone and cursed under your breath. It was late—too late for you to just walk through the front door without raising suspicion. You’d have to sneak back in, the way you’d done so many times before.

Luckily, your bedroom window was right next to a large tree, its thick branches stretching out toward the house. You’d used it countless times to sneak out during the night—mostly for Demogorgon hunts, other emergencies, or just moments when you needed to breathe. No one had ever noticed you were gone before, and you hoped tonight would be the same.

You scaled the tree easily, slipping through your window with practiced quietness. Your room was dark and empty, just as you’d left it. You landed on your feet with a soft thud, shutting the window behind you and breathing out a sigh of relief. Another successful sneak-in.

As you peeled off your jacket and kicked off your shoes, your mind buzzed with everything that had been said tonight. The Guardians. The warning. Your double life. You were exhausted, but sleep didn’t feel like an option. Your thoughts raced too fast, the weight of everything too heavy to ignore.

But you’d have to manage. You had school in the morning, and you had to act like nothing was wrong. Like you weren’t living on borrowed time in a world that had no idea what was coming.

You stared at the ceiling, the darkness of your room feeling more suffocating than comforting.

We’ll figure it out, you reminded yourself.

But you couldn’t help wondering if there’d be enough time for that.

Sleep didn’t come easy. Your mind was racing with everything you had discussed with your friends—plans, risks, the weight of the world. You tossed and turned for hours, until at some point, exhaustion finally claimed you around 1 AM. But it wasn’t peaceful. Your sleep was fitful, plagued by nightmares that wrapped around your mind like chains.

Suddenly, you jerked awake, a small scream ripping through your throat. You bolted upright, cold sweat drenching your skin, your heart pounding in your chest as if it were trying to escape. For a moment, you couldn’t remember where you were—your mind still trapped in the vivid images of your dreams. It took a few seconds to realize you were in your bedroom, safe in the quiet of the night.

You took a few deep breaths, clutching your chest in a futile attempt to calm your racing heart. Your hands shook slightly as you ran them through your hair, trying to shake off the lingering terror of the nightmare. It had been so real, like you were reliving every moment of your death, your father’s hand crushing your skull all over again.

Carefully, you swung your legs over the side of the bed, your feet touching the cold floor as you nudged the door ajar. You peeked through the crack, listening for any signs of movement in the house. The hallway was dark and still, and after a few moments, you sighed in relief. It seemed like your scream hadn’t woken anyone up. The last thing you needed was to explain why you were screaming in the middle of the night.

You checked the time on your phone. 3:17 AM.

With a frustrated groan, you realized there was no way you were getting any more sleep tonight. You felt too wired, too shaken, the adrenaline still rushing through your veins from the nightmare. Instead of lying back down and risking another round of restless tossing, you decided to head downstairs.

The kitchen was your destination, and you had every intention of making yourself a cup of tea or coffee—anything to calm your nerves. But once you made it to the dining room, something inside you crumbled. You found yourself sitting down at the table instead, your head falling into your hands, elbows resting on the worn wood surface.

You zoned out, your mind going blank as you stared ahead, your hands cradling your head like you were trying to hold yourself together. You felt small. Pathetic, even. You couldn’t even bring yourself to make coffee, let alone deal with the impossible task that lay ahead of you. Everything felt too heavy, too overwhelming. For all the strength you had shown fighting Demogorgons and surviving the apocalypse, right now, in this quiet house, you felt more fragile than ever.

Unbeknownst to you, someone was watching.

From the shadows of the staircase, Mark stood silently, his eyes locked onto your hunched figure as you sat there, lost in your own world. He didn’t make a sound, didn’t move. He just watched.

From where he stood, you looked so small, almost frail. It was crazy to him that the two of you were even related, considering how different you were. You, with your fragile human body, your easily bruised emotions. He, on the other hand, had grown stronger, more powerful. The gap between the two of you had widened so much over the years that, in his eyes, you weren’t even in the same league anymore.

But that’s what Mark had always obsessively loved about you. His precious little sister. You were human, weak, and that meant you relied on him and Dad to protect you. To him, that was your role—to be the one he could shelter and protect. The one who couldn’t do it on her own.

At school, he had made it very clear to everyone: you were off-limits. No one dared lay a hand on you, not with Mark’s reputation looming over them. If anyone even thought about hurting you, they’d meet his fist—and death—before they had the chance to follow through. That was the silent promise he had made. Nobody was allowed to hurt you.

Except him and Dad.

As he stood there watching you, a strange mix of emotions twisted inside him. He couldn’t help but feel a strange satisfaction knowing you were dependent on him, that your weakness kept you under his protection. But at the same time, something about the way you looked tonight—hunched over in that chair, lost in your thoughts—stirred an odd feeling in him.

He wouldn’t admit it to himself, but something was off about you lately. He’d noticed it. The nervous energy, the odd silences, the way you seemed to be… slipping away from him somehow. But it didn’t matter. Whatever was going on, he’d keep a close eye on you. You were his sister, his responsibility.

And no one could take that from him.

Morning arrived far sooner than you would have liked. The first rays of sunlight filtered through the window, cutting through the quiet of the house and landing directly on your face. You groaned, blinking against the harsh light, realizing you hadn’t moved from the dining table. Your body ached from sitting hunched over in the chair for hours, your mind still foggy with the weight of your sleepless night.

Today was going to suck. A lot.

You rubbed your eyes, feeling the heaviness beneath them, the exhaustion settling into your bones. You could practically feel the bags under your eyes, the dull ache of tiredness seeping into your skin. You didn’t even need to look in a mirror to know you probably looked like a mess. Red-rimmed eyes, pale skin, and the exhaustion you could never quite hide.

Just get through the day, you told yourself, trying to muster some kind of resolve.

You slowly pushed yourself up from the chair, every muscle in your body protesting. The kitchen felt too quiet now, the soft sounds of the house waking up adding to the strange stillness of your thoughts.

Gods, you need a warm shower. Or maybe a baseball bat to the head.

With a tired groan, you shuffled toward the stairs, deciding a shower might at least help clear the fog in your mind. You hoped the hot water would be enough to wash away the exhaustion clinging to your body. Maybe it could ease the tightness in your chest.

You stripped off your clothes and stepped into the shower, letting the hot water cascade over your shoulders, washing away the cold sweat from last night’s nightmares. The warmth soothed your muscles, but it did little to ease the knot in your stomach. The events of last night, the conversation with your friends, the weight of everything still hung over you like a storm cloud.

There was no escape from it.

You sighed, leaning your head against the cool tile. The shower wasn’t helping as much as you had hoped. You were still exhausted, both physically and mentally. The knowledge that you had to face school today, pretend everything was normal while juggling this monumental responsibility, was almost too much to bear.

But you don’t have a choice.

You had to go on like you always did. Put on a brave face, go through the motions, act like everything was fine, and then meet with your friends later to figure out how to save the world. Again.

The water began to cool, and with another groan, you reluctantly stepped out of the shower, grabbing a towel and drying yourself off. You stared at yourself in the mirror, wincing at your reflection. Red-rimmed eyes, pale skin, and exhaustion etched into every line of your face.

You look like a wreck, you thought, shaking your head. But there was no time to dwell on it. You had to get through the day, no matter what.

You sluggishly dried yourself off, the warm water doing little to shake the exhaustion clinging to you. Once you were dry, you threw on some clothes, not really caring much about what you wore today—just whatever was clean and comfortable. You glanced at the clock on your dresser. 7:00 AM.

School wouldn’t start until 8:20, so you had some time. Normally, you’d still be asleep, trying to squeeze in the last few minutes of rest before rushing to get ready. But after last night, sleep wasn’t really an option.

For the next thirty minutes, you just sat on your bed, scrolling through your phone absentmindedly. You weren’t really looking for anything specific, just trying to remember who you used to be. Pictures of you and your friends popped up—Hallie, Connor, Weston. The four of you, smiling at the camera, carefree, before everything went to hell. Then there were other photos—random shots of acquaintances from school, parties you barely remembered attending, school dances where you smiled like the biggest worry in your life was whether your shoes matched your dress.

How different things had been. How different you had been.

The sound of movement from down the hall snapped you out of your thoughts. You heard Mark getting ready in his room, the familiar sounds of him moving around as he prepared for the day. Right. He drove you to school most mornings, and today would be no different.

You used to be excited about these car rides. Before, it was one of the few times you could really spend with Mark. He was a senior, always busy with schoolwork, football, or hanging out with his friends, so the drive to school was a guaranteed window of time where you could talk, laugh, and catch up.

But now? Now you dreaded it. The idea of sitting in a car with Mark, pretending everything was fine, made your stomach churn.

With a sigh, you got up from your bed, scrambling around to find your school bag. You mentally checked off the things you’d need for the day—binders, notebooks, pens—but your mind was elsewhere. Without thinking, you checked the small hidden compartment of your bag, making sure it was still packed.

A small knife. A bottle of hairspray. A lighter.

For the Demogorgons. Their biggest weakness was heat, especially fire, so you and your friends always carried around something to ignite them with. It had become second nature by now—packing your school bag with both homework and weapons. Sure, if the school ever found out you were carrying that stuff, you’d be expelled without question. But you were usually one of the good kids, known for being respectful and doing your work. That bought you a bit of leeway.

Did you occasionally miss class, ducking out to handle Demogorgons or chase down whatever creature was lurking nearby? Yes. And when you got caught? Detention. You smirked a little at the memory of you, Connor, Hallie, and Weston all sitting in detention together, exchanging looks across the room, barely holding in your laughter after a particularly difficult hunt. You had spent more than a few afternoons in those detention rooms, trying to explain your absences in ways that wouldn’t raise suspicion.

Grumbling at the thought, you slung your bag over your shoulder and headed downstairs. You grabbed a protein bar from the pantry as you slipped your shoes on, trying to push the nerves out of your stomach as you mentally prepared for the car ride with Mark.

You could hear him coming down the stairs behind you, and for a second, you froze, bracing yourself for the interaction. It felt like every moment with him now was tinged with tension, with the unspoken knowledge of what was to come.

“You ready to go?” Mark’s voice was casual, as if everything was normal.

“Yeah,” you replied, forcing a smile as you glanced over your shoulder at him.

He smiled back, though there was something in his eyes, something you couldn’t quite place. Maybe it was the weight of everything you knew, or maybe it was just your paranoia creeping in, but for a brief second, you felt like he was watching you a little too closely.

You pushed the thought away and grabbed your jacket, trying to act like everything was fine. You think you’d gotten pretty good at lying and pretending everything was okay, i mean, you did successfully hide the fact that you hunt Demogorgons in your past life.

So, it should be no different this time around, right?

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