#and like a solid half of them were “this makes me think of miles Edgeworth””’

[probablygayattorneys]

I accidentally messaged a friend from the musical fandom that I usually contact through my main blog from this one instead but she saw right through me.

[amazingmsme]

Annoying Turnabout

This was supposed to be a quick little drabble, but I have no self control and it got away from me. No matter, Ace Attorney needs more fluffy fics like this. Phoenix is so fucking cute when he’s embarrassed, and I probably made Edgeworth more teasy than he’d actually be. But that’s okay your honor, they’re smitten.

Miles Edgeworth was a composed man. He didn't often joke around and laughed rarely. His smile was more of a snide smirk, even when it was genuine. And to top it all off, he had an air of superiority about him, like he was too good for anything even mildly amusing. Which is why Phoenix was determined to make him crack.

"Y'know Miles, even though you were an uptight kid, you still knew how to have fun," he noted. Edgeworth cocked a brow, glancing up from the magazine he was reading. "Is that so?"

"Mhm."

"Your point being..." he prompted, trailing off as he went back to reading. Phoenix shrugged, the hint of a smile on his face.

"I don't know. I just never thought you'd grow up to be such a stick in the mud," he said, hoping to gain a reaction from him. Edgeworth stiffened, hands clenching and crinkling the pages as he glared at him.

"Excuse me, what did you just call me?" he said through his teeth.

"You heard me. Or do you need hearing aids?" he asked smugly. Miles knew he was just messing with him. Trying to rile him up. And he shouldn't give him what he wanted. But oh, how he wanted to play along.

"You're the one who needs hearing aids, old man," he said, a teasing note in his voice.

Phoenix chuckled and shook his head. "We're the same age, so you basically called yourself old." Edgeworth looked up, eyes wide and hair falling in his face. "Nhg- You know damn well that's not what I meant!" he said, slamming a fist on the table.

He merely smirked, propping his feet on Edgeworth's desk and leaned back in his chair. He even put his hands behind his head in a show of defiance. "Do I?" Miles glared harder and grabbed his ankles, shoving them off the desk. Phoenix flailed his arms to regain his balance as the chair teetered on its back legs.

Edgeworth hummed as he steadied himself. "Pity, I was hoping you'd fall."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" he teased, leaning forward this time. Miles rolled his eyes and went back to reading. Phoenix huffed in annoyance when he was ignored. He stretched his leg out under the table and lightly stepped on the toe of his shoe.

He grunted and pulled his foot away, only for Wright to repeat the motion. He looked at him from over the top of his magazine. "Is there a reason why you're more insufferable than usual?" he asked.

The truth of the matter was that Phoenix thought he was unbelievably cute when aggravated. And deep down, he was a little shit.

"Nope," he said, popping the "p."

"What are we, five years old now?" Miles asked incredulously.

Phoenix shrugged. "Hey, I'd rather have a mental age of five than 50," he sassed.

"Wright. You are testing my patience, and you don't want to know what will happen when it runs out," he warned.

"You know what? I think I do actually," he taunted. Edgeworth let out a deep sigh and stood, straightening the collar of his suit jacket.

"Very well. If you want to act like a child, I'll treat you like one." Phoenix cocked his head to the side, staying still as he watched his old friend come closer. As Miles loomed over him, only then did he falter. He gave a nervous chuckle and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

"Uh, Miles? You got that scary look on your face that you use in court. Y-you know I was only joking, right?" he asked, trying to appear as innocent as possible.

"Believe me, I'm well aware. However, your little jokes aren't near as amusing as you may think. Don't worry, I'll give you something to laugh about." Before Wright could question him, he poked a single finger in his exposed armpit. He yelped and immediately slammed his arm to his side.

"You know what? You're right, I was being stupid and childish, I'll leave you alone now, I promise!" he rambled.

Edgeworth shook his head and tsked. "You will leave me alone. As soon as I teach you a lesson." When he took another step forward, Phoenix rose from his chair, standing behind it to use it as a shield.

"B-but you're usually so mature! I thought you'd be above something as childish as ti- as this!" he said, face turning bright red as he stuttered and failed to say the word. This only made Edgeworth's smirk grow.

"Normally I am. But you bring out the best in me Wright. Certainly a bit of immaturity is required to deal with you."

They stood there, just staring at each other for a solid 10 seconds. Phoenix's eyes darted to the side before he made a dash for the door. Miles easily caught him, arm wrapping around his waist and pulling him into his clutches.

"No no nohoho I'm sorry!" he giggled, shoving at his arm. Miles dug his fingers into his sides and he burst into bubbly laughter.

"For some reason, I don't believe you. You know, you're awfully cocky for someone who's so ticklish," he mused playfully. Phoenix's blush darkened and he covered his face with one hand.

"Shuhuhut uhuhup!"

"Why should I? You obviously can't make me in your state," he teased. He began kneading his soft belly and his laughter deepened and his thrashing increased. It was a bright and slightly goofy sound, and it was perfectly fitting for the ace attorney.

"Mihihiles dohohon't!" he whined through his frantic giggles.

"Don't what? Come on Wright, use your words," he goaded, one hand scratching up his ribs. The only response he got in return was a loud squeal. "Glad to see my memory is serving me well. Does Larry still abuse this knowledge?" he asked, amusement clear in his voice.

"Yehehes okay? Nohohow quit ihihit!" he giggled, curling in on himself. His arms flailed about uselessly as Miles squeezed and prodded his belly. He snorted loudly and blushed profusely, hiding his embarrassed face in his hands.

Edgeworth barked out a laugh. "I forgot how you snort when you laugh too hard. How hilariously charming," he teased. Poor Phoenix was dying of embarrassment.

"Nohoho it's nohohot!" he argued, followed by another snort.

"Sure it is. And don't even get me started on this spot," he taunted, reaching up to scratch the nape of his neck. Phoenix arched his back with a shrill screech of laughter, leaning into Miles. He fell into a bubbly stream of giggles, not even bothering to fight back anymore. Not that he could get away even if he tried; Edgeworth was stronger than he looked.

"Still just as ticklish as when we were kids," he mused, shaking his head fondly. It was only when Phoenix started to hiccup through his hysterical laughter that he finally showed mercy.

He helped steady him as he regained his breath. "Yo- hic-you jeherk!" he scolded, cheeks still burning red. Miles rolled his eyes.

"Yes, I know. I'm truly the worst," he joked along. They both chuckled.

"If you think I'm gonna leave you alone after that, you're wrong. I can't just let you get away with an attack like that! I have to annoy you twice as much now," Wright said, crossing his arms.

He merely shrugged, smirk growing. "In that case, I'll just have to tickle you twice as much."

Phoenix flinched and took a step back, a bead of sweat rolling down his forehead. "N-no you can't!"

"Oh can't I?" he asked, arching a brow. He cocked his head to the side in amusement. "I'd think again before testing my patience. Unless you're keen on finding out what I can really dish out," he warned, even winking at him. Phoenix whined and hid his face in his hands.

"I forgot how insufferable you can be," he grumbled.

"Well then you're really not going to like what I'm about to say."

Phoenix felt his heart both flutter and sink to the pit of his stomach at the same time. "What?" he asked, because the curiosity was going to eat him alive.

"I recall you admitting that you found all of this to be fun," he said with a triumphant smile. Wright's mouth gaped open, face turning pale before his blush came back in full force at the very accurate accusation.

"Wha- I- we were kids! Of course I liked it back then, it was playful roughhousing! I grew out of it!" he claimed, desperate to reclaim some of his dignity.

Edgeworth tutted, shaking his head. "Oh please, you know I'm too smart to believe that. You even went as far as to provoke me into action, resorting to your old methods in the hope that I would remember."

Phoenix was left speechless... Miles really hit the nail on the head with that one. He groaned, admitting defeat and flopping into the chair at the desk. He rest his head on the cool wood, wrapping his arms around his face to shield himself from Edgeworth's gaze.

"There's nothing to be ashamed of Wright. I find it rather amusing myself," he teased, sitting in the opposite chair. He looked up to glare at him.

"Of course you do."

"Oh please. Teasing's half of the fun. You told me so yourself."

Phoenix's eyes narrowed. "No I didn't." Then his eyes widened as he thought it over. "Wait, did I?" he asked aloud, more to himself than to Miles.

He shrugged. "No, but the fact you believed you could have only proves my point."

He let out a small, frustrated scream and slammed his head back down on the desk as Edgeworth's snide chuckling filled the air.

[snezfics-n-shit]

Home For The Holidays - An AA fic that’s way too long

I’ve been thinkin bout that post that’s like “character with the kink is sneezing a lot and their partner who usually indulges them is having fun with How The Turns Have Tabled” so now I give you a Wrightworth + snzfcker Phoenix fic based on that exact premise. In which Phoenix re-introduces Miles to Mama Wright, Christmas is celebrated for 2 months straight, and disaster man Phoenix is back on his bullshit.

Tbh if I kept this lying around I’d just keep editing and it’d never get done oof but please enjoy

          Phoenix’s mother had clearly purchased a new doorbell. The tune echoed from behind the door at the press of the button; this year, it was much louder and played Jingle Bells a month too early. Speaking of a month too early, other than a rather articulate variant of a ‘no soliciting’ sticker, the decorations on the door were Christmas themed as well, completely skipping Thanksgiving and likely put up the day after Halloween. That was just how Mrs. Wright was: a major Christmas enthusiast through and through.

Just as expected, she greeted her son and his family while sporting a comfy Christmas-themed sweater. Cats in Santa hats, a design that had Trucy in awe at how cute they were. Christmas and cats, two of Mrs. Wright’s joys in life. Mrs. Wright had little contact with family members other than Phoenix and Trucy, so she resolved a lot of the resulting loneliness by adopting cats. The cats she adopted were a lot like her, having few blood relatives around and finding a home in a found family.

“Phoenix! You’re early!” Mrs. Wright looked up and down at her son, assessing just how many extra pies she would need to make; he was skin and bones since he had been disbarred! “You didn’t have to shave before you came, dear. The holiday is this Thursday, so you have time to make yourself look nice.”

“You tell me that every time I visit, mom.” Phoenix chuckled. “Today, I have a good reason to look nice. There’s someone I’d like for you to meet.”

“Well, I know I’ve met your adorable daughter before.” Mrs. Wright leaned down to give Trucy a big hug. “You have no idea how happy I am to have a grandbaby to spoil!”

“You tell me that every time, too.” Phoenix stepped to the side, showing off Miles, who had done a spectacular job at hiding behind him before the big reveal. “This is my boyfriend, Miles Edgeworth. I’ve been meaning to tell you since we started dating, but only now does he have a day off where you can finally meet in person.”

“Wait, Miles?” Mrs. Wright blinked a few times. Miles was certainly as well dressed as the boy she remembered Phoenix bringing home so many times, but was he the same person? “That sweet boy who would always help me with the dishes when he stayed over? This is him?”

“I believe so, Mrs. Wright.” Miles hardly remembered his youth well enough to give a definite answer, but that sounded like something he would have done. It sounded like something he would do even now, actually.

“Sounds like you found yourself a keeper, dear.” Mrs. Wright held the door open wider to let the trio in. “It’s awfully chilly today. Come inside before you catch a cold.”

The walls were lined with framed pictures of Phoenix, with unsurprisingly many of which being of him celebrating Christmas. The trend continued even with pictures of Trucy that Phoenix had sent to his mother. While there weren’t nearly as many, there were a few notable photos of Phoenix’s parents: the pictures taken when they renewed their wedding vows and when Mrs. Wright got her associate’s degree after Phoenix started working with Mia, for example.

“Ah, now I remember.” Miles looked a little uncomfortable with the holiday-centric décor. “Your mother’s Christmas obsession.”

“Be nice.” Phoenix whispered. “It’s something she really likes; it’s not hurting anyone.”

“I love Grandma’s reindeer!” Trucy lifted herself with her tiptoes, eager to see the skillfully crafted wooden reindeer lining the shelf above the shoe rack. “Rudolph’s my favorite! Because he made everyone real sorry for making fun of him!”

“He did, didn’t he?” Phoenix slipped off his shoes and hung up his and Miles’s coats on the coat rack. “I like him, too. He had a talent that really turned Christmas eve around.” That sounded much like how he used to be in the courtroom. He missed that courtroom a lot.

“I’m gonna go find Buster!” Trucy ran off. Buster was one of Mrs. Wright’s cats; his big personality quickly made him Trucy’s favorite. Phoenix, however, was more fond of Doily (formerly Dollie), a friendly and relaxed cat who was happy as long as she had somewhere to sit. There were three more: a senior cat named Gerald, a gray tabby named Della, and a new kitten named Harvey. While it seemed like a lot of cats, the home Phoenix’s parents resided in after Phoenix left for Ivy University was specifically picked to be spacious enough for even the most rambunctious cats. 

“I believe you told me you wanted to introduce me to your parents’ cats, correct?” Miles followed Phoenix to one of the living room couches. “And you’re sure they’re not aggressive or anything?” While Miles knew dogs had a history of being working and companion animals, he couldn’t exactly say he had read any solid proof of cats earning a similarly high status. Even the nicest cats he had met always seemed more interested in leaving as many scars on his hand as possible than being friendly with him. 

“I can vouch for all but Harvey, since he’s new, but my mom has always been something like a cat whisperer.” Phoenix yanked a tissue from the end table next to the couch’s arm rest. “I’m sure they’ll like you a lot.” He smiled before blowing his nose softly. “My nose must be thawing out.” He chuckled.

“I told you to bring your scarf when I called you.” Mrs. Wright called out from the kitchen. “Now you’re catching a cold, aren’t you?”

“No, I feel fine.” Phoenix rubbed the bottom of his nose with the tissue folded in half. “Just part of warming up.”

“I’m surprised you’d forget your scarf for someone who claims going out with a wet head spells ‘pneumonia.’” Miles hummed. 

“Hey, you know it’s not scarf weather.” Phoenix chuckled and tossed the tissue into the trash bin, impressed that he made the shot. Miles found it amusing that Phoenix completely ignored the wet head comment, likely because he really did tell Miles and Trucy that all the time. “It is the perfect weather for mom’s homemade stew, though.”

“I’m eager to try it, considering you’ve been talking it up since she called to invite us over.”

“It’s really good!” Phoenix repeated the claim he had been making for weeks. “I can’t wait for you to try it.” He pressed his knuckle against his nose. “Hopefully it’ll be dinner soon.”

“That won’t be for a while, I’m afraid.” Mrs. Wright carried some glasses of water to the living room. “Your father is working late tonight.”

“What does he do?” Miles leaned forward.

“He works in construction. He’s very proud of his work.” Mrs. Wright smiled as she placed the glasses of water on the coasters sitting in front of Miles and Phoenix. “Before Phoenix was born, where he worked didn’t earn him nearly enough to support us. He’s been much happier ever since he’s found somewhere that lets us live comfortably.”

“Where did he work before, if you-” Miles was cut off by the sound of Phoenix blowing his nose again. “If you don’t mind me asking, of course.”

“He worked with his father and other members of the community he grew up in.” Mrs. Wright explained. “It was actually looked down upon to earn the income we needed, or to even have a dream job. That’s why we’ve been so supportive of Phoenix pursuing his dreams; if he wanted to change his major a second time, we would have gladly let him.”

Miles couldn’t imagine being actively discouraged from achieving success. He assumed that pressure was always the other way around. He wasn’t able to lose himself in his curiosity, though. Phoenix’s deep sniffing made sure of that. 

“Phoenix?” Mrs. Wright cocked her head. “Are you sure you’re feeling alright?”

“Yeah, really.” Phoenix waved his hand as if to dismiss any concerns. “I’m sure this’ll stop before dinner.” His breath hitched for a second, but nothing came of it other than an exhale through his mouth.

“If you say so.” Mrs. Wright stood up and left for the kitchen. “I’m going to work on the desserts, so you two just relax and drink your water. I think you need eight glasses a day.”

“Daddy! I found Buster!” Trucy cradled the fluffy orange cat like a baby, Buster’s favorite way to be held. “He let me hold him this whole time! He’s so nice!” Phoenix gave Miles a reassuring smile, pointing to Buster as proof the Wright cats were much friendlier than past cats Miles had met.

“Hey there, Buster.” Phoenix beckoned Buster to sit on his lap. “Wow, he’s really liking me today.” He blinked a few times. “Normally he just walks away when I ask for him to sit next to me.”

“Maybe he can smell that you’ve been spoiling Pess,” Miles joked, “and he wants you to spoil him as well.”

“Cats are pretty smart. Ah!” Phoenix reached for another tissue, squeezing his eyes shut as he blew more heavily than the last time. “Guess I wasn’t done.” He laughed, dabbing the corners of his eyes. “But yeah, I think you’re right.”

“I hope he’ll like me as much as he likes you.” Miles reached to pet Buster and was shocked to hear the loud purrs the cat made. Buster was so soft, Miles thought he could pet him forever; there weren’t even any claws out. “He’s actually letting me pet him.” 

“I told you so.” Phoenix sniffed. “Buster is really friendly. My parents have had him for almost as long as we had Doily. She’s my favorite. I’d show her to you but she’s probably asleep right now.” He pressed the back of his wrist against his right eye, putting on some pressure as he rubbed absentmindedly. Dropping his hand revealed the area around his eyelid to be a tad pink.

“Are you tired from the trip, love?” Miles removed his hand from petting Buster to caress Phoenix’s cheek. “Maybe you should lie down for a while.”

“Yeah, I usually do that when I visit mom alone, actually.” Phoenix gently picked Buster up to gently place on Miles’s lap, laughing softly as he watched Miles light up in fascination with Buster’s sociability. He disposed of his tissue before poking his head into the kitchen doorway to find his mother and Trucy taste-testing desserts. “Uh, hey, mom?”

“Yes?” Mrs. Wright looked up from the tray of finger food desserts. Quite a few were already gone, but knowing her, there would be more by the time she brought out her famous pumpkin pie.

“I’m going to lie down for a while. I should be up for dinner, though.” Phoenix directed his attention to his daughter, whose whipped cream decorated cheeks were proof she had her share of the desserts. “And Trucy?”

“Yes, Daddy?”

“Try not to eat too many sweets or you’ll spoil your appetite.” 

“Okay.” Trucy nodded and proceeded to put another small dessert in her mouth.

“Go ahead and get some rest, dear.” Mrs. Wright sighed at the sight of Phoenix’s face. “You do look pretty tired. Your bedroom should be ready, but you might need to convince Doily to let you have some room on your bed.”

“Doily’s always been my sleeping buddy here, so I don’t mind.” Phoenix assured. He made his journey upstairs, sniffling once or twice and noting he needed to blow his nose again. The sight of only two twin sized beds in the guest room was disappointing, but considering Miles was a surprise additional guest, it was more Phoenix’s fault for not allowing his mother more time to make the appropriate accommodations. Maybe he and Miles could alternate between the bed and the living room couch while Trucy kept her bunny themed bed throughout the week of their stay. 

As predicted, Doily was sleeping on Phoenix’s pillow and needed just a gentle nudge to let him have somewhere to put his head; not enough to chase her off the bed completely, just enough to make some room.

“Hey, Doily. Did you miss me?” His vision grew slightly blurry and his eyes felt wet. Phoenix didn’t remember yawning, but he must have been really tired. “I could use a nap, too, so I’d like you to… hh… to-- Hh’TTCCHHHhh!” He kept his tongue at the roof of his mouth as if that would quiet the sound. Despite his efforts, he scared Doily off the bed completely. “Ngh… Sorry.” He sniffled with his hand pressed under his nose. Maybe he was coming down with a cold after all. 

He slid himself under the blanket, admittedly afraid of how he would be feeling whenever he would wake up. If he was getting sick, maybe it wasn’t completely bad, considering he was staying with his mother. His mom was good at that sort of thing, even long after he moved out on his own. 

When the back of his head hit the pillow a deep, aggressive itch attacked the back of his eyes and sinuses. How was he supposed to sleep like this? No matter how hard he pressed, alternating between rubbing his eyes and nose, it only seemed to get worse. Was that his pulse? Behind his eyes?  

“A’aschhHUUH! Aa’SSCHHHOOUuh! T’TTCHHuuh!!” He sat up, only just having a moment to get some air before he started again. “T’SHCHUUH!! TT’CHHHOOUH!!”

“Sweetheart, sorry to disturb you, but--” Miles stopped in his tracks at the sight of the state Phoenix was in. “Are you… feeling alright?”

“This has to be the weirdest cold I’ve ever had.” Phoenix squinted as he sniffled thickly. “I just wedt to lie dowd ahd-- Hh’TTTCHHOOH! I cad’t stop sdeezi’g.” 

“I see.” Miles kept his mouth shut regarding how this was the exact sort of thing he’d tell Phoenix to make him flustered. He did, however, thought it would be amusing to see Phoenix’s face when offered a handkerchief. “Here, you could use this.” Phoenix didn’t look flustered at all, simply desperate as he took the handkerchief and sneezed thrice into it. What a shame. “You were fine when we left home.” 

“That’s what’s so weird about it!” Phoenix aggressively rubbed at his face. “Dot to bedtiod everythi’g itches.”

“That doesn’t sound like a cold, love.” Miles wiped some of the tears from Phoenix’s face with his thumb. 

“I feel pretty sick.” Phoenix muttered before blowing his nose again, unsure why he was even bothering at this point.

“I imagine you do.” Miles kissed Phoenix’s very wet cheek. “Poor thing. Do you have any ideas on what’s making you feel so bad?”

“Nope.” Phoenix shook his head. “I kinda just started a little bit when we got here and-- Aa’SSHHOOUH! T’TSSCHHOOUHh!! *snf* I can’t stop since I came upstairs.”

“Maybe you’ve developed an allergy to cats?” 

“Don’t even joke about that!” Phoenix scolded, taking offense. “They’re my family!”

“I’m not joking. It’s a genuine possibility.” Miles made a small gasp and looked at his hand. “I touched your face after petting one of them, too. I’m so sorry.”

"Don't be sorry because I'm not allergic to cats." Phoenix huffed. He pushed the blanket off his lap and stood up, not wanting to discuss the topic further. “I’m going back downstairs.”

“Alright.” There was no point in arguing. If Phoenix was going to be so stubborn about this, then Miles just needed to make the best of the situation.

Miles followed Phoenix down the stairs, briefly interrupted when Phoenix needed to stop halfway so he could sneeze again.

“Bless you, sweetheart.” He thought saying that might push the envelope a little.

“Are you baki’g fud of be?” Phoenix glared at him through red, damp eyes. 

“I wouldn’t dare.” Miles answered sincerely. “You just sound so awful.” Okay, maybe he was having a little fun, nudging Phoenix to hopefully see the amusing irony of his circumstances.

Phoenix grumbled something as he dragged himself to the kitchen, clearly still annoyed with Miles for what he had said earlier.

“I thought you were napping, Daddy.” Trucy looked up from a tall glass of chocolate milk. “Did you have a bad dream?”

“He couldn’t get any sleep, from what I can tell.” Miles leaned against Phoenix’s shoulder. 

“I’m pretty sure I’m getting sick.” Phoenix scratched the back of his head. 

“Oh, I knew you’d catch a cold standing out there without a scarf.” Mrs. Wright gently pushed Phoenix on the way to the living room. “Rest on the couch and I’ll get you some blankets.”

“I told you, it’s just a cold, really.” Phoenix made eye contact with Miles the whole time as he blew his nose with a fresh tissue. 

“Perhaps you’re right.” Miles lied and kissed the top of his boyfriend’s head. “I certainly hope you’ll feel well enough to join us for dinner on Thursday.”

“Of course I will.” Phoenix insisted just before Mrs. Wright draped a large blanket over him. While Phoenix thought nothing of it and the intense itch that followed, Miles needed to hold his tongue as he watched short hairs floating around in Phoenix’s general direction. “T-Thanks.” He stuttered as he fanned his face with his hands, truly a sight Miles wished he could comment on with honesty. “Aa’IIISHHHUUH! T’TCHHUUh!! Ugh. Ow.”

“Your poor nose.” Miles cooed. “It must be so tiring, sneezing like that.”

“It is.” Phoenix furiously rubbed at his eyes. “Agh, my eyes, too.”

“They’re really bothering you, aren’t they?” Miles played up his sincere concern. “Driving you crazy, I bet.” He dropped a hint, hoping that extra pink in Phoenix’s face wasn’t just more released histamine. In the corner of his eye was Doily, who was staring intently at Phoenix. “Hey, little one.” Miles leaned over to pet the cat. “I don’t think it’s a good idea to stay here like that.” He whispered, not wanting to further offend Phoenix.

Doily, being hardly fluent in human suggestion, hopped onto Phoenix’s lap anyway. 

“Doily, did you come to check up on me?” Phoenix could hardly keep his smile in place before he started sneezing again. “Gh… Sorry, Doily.” He scratched behind Doily’s ears; the sound of his sniffling accompanied her purring.

“Um, sweetheart?” 

“I know what you’re about to say, and I still say no.” Phoenix pet Doily with both hands, almost out of spite.

“No, that’s not exactly--”

“Daddy! You found Doily!” Trucy stared at Phoenix and the purring cat for a while. “What’s wrong with your arms, Daddy?” Miles took hold of Phoenix’s right arm.

“Hey! You’ll scare her away again!” Phoenix protested, not even paying attention to what Miles was doing. Just as he warned, Doily was startled by the sudden movement and ran off somewhere else in the house.

“Hives.” Miles observed bluntly. “Trucy, dear, could you ask your grandmother to find some benadryl?” Phoenix raised no objections to that, which Miles hardly minded at all. 

“Okay, Papa Miles!” Trucy ran off to find Mrs. Wright, leaving Phoenix and Miles alone to hopefully reach an agreement.

“Well, what happens now?” Phoenix looked down. “Do I just never visit my parents again?” Was that his way of saying Miles was right?

“Of course not, love.” Miles massaged the blotchy areas of Phoenix’s arm. “You’ll just need to be more careful, which you’ve been failing to do a lot lately. Feels like everyday I need to pull you out of trouble.”

“I can’t eat mom’s cooking if I’m asleep, though.” Phoenix let his head hit the soft back of the couch.

“Then we’ll pick up something non-drowsy while you’re resting this evening.” Miles made it sound so easy. In fact, everything he had been saying recently sounded just so… so… Oh.

“You’ve been talking like this on purpose.” Phoenix accused, punctuated by a thick sniffle. There was that flush Miles was looking for. “Is that what I sound like?” He hid his face behind his hands.

“I took some creative license.” Miles smirked before kissing Phoenix��s cheek. “I was starting to get worried when you said you ‘couldn’t stop sneezing’ with a straight face.” 

“Don’t remind me.”

“And miss out on all this fun? I think not.” 

“So is this all-- T’TCHHHOOH!” Phoenix pressed his hand under his nose, giving his voice even more of a nasal quality. “It’s all just payback, huh?”

“Not quite.” Miles held Phoenix’s free hand with both his hands. “You always make me feel so attractive even when I’m looking like you do right now.”

“That’s because you can pull it off.” Phoenix finally managed to chuckle. 

“And so can you.” Miles didn’t let Phoenix protest that, shushing him with an index finger pressed to his lips. “I may not know one hundred percent how you see me, but I’d like you to feel every bit as special.”

“Miles!” Aha! Now Phoenix was very red in the face. Mission successful, if Miles said so himself. “Maybe when I don’t hear my mom’s footsteps coming down the stairs.”

[zombolouge]

⭐⭐⭐!! I'm behind on catching up with Indefensible (bc I am also in the US and have been Big Overwhelmed too, so sending positive mental health vibes your way as well), so I will leave it to you to pick a part of a fic that you are most dying to discuss!

AH bb take your time catching up, there’s no rush!! It will still be there whenever you’re ready <3 I will send some positive mental health vibes right back at you, lord knows all of us in the US really need them lol 

Okay, so my pick for this...hmmm, why don’t we talk about TRAUMA. I’ve had a lot of people comment about how I handle everyone’s trauma in the series, so I figure that’s a solid point of interest :)

I knew I was going to be writing this fic before I had actually played all the games, which gave me a bit of an advantage from a writing perspective because I actually took a HUGE amount of notes while I played. The most important of these notes were pages that I called “Lists of Trauma”. And I had one for every character. I would set them up every time I saw something in the games that would have been potentially traumatic, including backstory stuff that came to light. Then I’d write down what the trauma was, when it occurred, and how I felt it would affect them (both immediately and long term). 

Pretty much everybody gets that Miles Edgeworth is traumatized. The game does a decent job of showing some of that, by giving him PTSD and mentioning his fear of elevators, using his recurring nightmares as a plot point, etc. But Miles is by FAR not the only one in the series traumatized. Pretty much every case is enough to send someone to therapy for a hell of a long time, but it’s not always highlighted as much as Miles, and I think it’s easy to brush everyone else’s trauma under the rug because their coping methods were a little more understated. I do think the evidence is there in the games, but it’s not obvious (Capcom puts a lot more subtlety in there than I initially would have expected. Either that or I’m adding subtext on my own and giving them too much credit. EITHER WAY, it did give me a lot to study and pick apart.)

One of the biggest themes in my writing is addressing and processing trauma (lol can you tell I have trauma I have worked on processing? hahaha). I tend to lean towards doing it in healthy and productive ways, as well, so I was HYPERFOCUSED on all the events happening to each individual character. By the end of the canon storylines, I had a pretty solid idea of what people still needed to work through and how things were holding them back, which is honestly how I arrived at some of the plotlines I did. They’re all engineered to be ways to push the characters where they need to be in order to heal. Or at least to grow (full healing is gonna take decades and y’all I can’t be writing this for the rest of my life haha)

In some cases, like with Phoenix and Miles and their relationship, I knew that it was going to involve a massive breaking point to get them anywhere. It’s been decades in game-time and they haven’t taken very many steps forward, which tells me that repression is so ingrained you basically have to make them completely snap and land in a place of “nothing left to lose” before they’d take any more steps. Hence the remote location and the cold temperatures and them working together and the closet scene and the hot tub scene and the spit-take scene and the obvious trap and...etc. Really had to slam their damn heads together repeatedly for this one. 

But their trauma, while being some of the most obvious, wasn’t the only kind I wanted to address. Like, seeing everything play out with Apollo and Dhurke, I just kept thinking how fuckin badly that would mess someone up, and that isn’t even considering what he’d gone through BEFORE that (former boss was a murderer, and the ways he found out weren’t the softest. Best friend murdered, and the circumstances around it ended up with him getting physically injured TWICE. There’s a lot going on with that poor boy.) And Maya, who is forever cheery in the games, always struck me as someone who hid any negative emotions at all costs, and holy shit she has to have a few. She’s been accused of murder, manipulated by family, her sister was murdered, she had to raise her cousin from a young age, she’s been kidnapped MULTIPLE TIMES, had her body taken over by someone that DEFINITELY wanted to kill her and her best friend. On top of that, the first games make it pretty clear she has some inferiority issues, and alllll those traumatic situations would have only fed into it. I think she got really good at covering that up rather than really good at feeling confident. 

Pretty much all the characters got trauma’d at one point or another, and the timeline over the span of canon basically meant that nobody ever had much time to recover before some other bullshit was happening. It’s why many of the characters in Indefensible, sometimes more than once, have opined about it being neverending or how they were losing hope that they’d ever have a whole year that was just normal. 

I’ve included so many scenes where they are just breaking down and talking about feelings, because holy fuck they all need to. lol It’s also why I ended up jumping on the FranMaya bandwagon so hard because the way that the pair of them are traumatized and how they handle it is very complementary to each other. I think they’re both able to pull the dark out and soothe it within one another, keep each other from overthinking things, and provide a sudden rock to lean on when things get difficult again. If they didn’t have each other, I think the second half of Indefensible wouldn’t work as well, because Franziska absolutely would have snapped irreparably. But, uh, that won’t make as much sense until later. ;)

Anyways, this was long and rambly and I could probably make a separate post about each individual character’s trauma and how the fic is designed to shine a spotlight on it and get them to start processing it. I THINK ABOUT THIS STUFF A LOT, OKAY? 

Link to the fic if anybody needs it: Indefensible 

[unnecessarygayfeelings]

Finished my Farafey fanficton! Here’s a link to it on ao3, but I know not everyone uses that, so I’ll post it here under the read more. No content warnings (there’s a small mention of alcohol, but no one is intoxicated), just 2k words of fluff. This is for the Farafey micronation especially @aquilamage because she has epic content that inspires me a lot.

Lavender Lip Gloss

It was new year's eve and Kay was going to be late to the party because her roommate was hogging the bathroom.

Kay should be used to this, really. Ever since she and Sebastian decided to rent an apartment together at the ripe old age of nineteen, she became well aware of her friend's quirks. But she could handle the misplaced pens, loud classical music, and endless pacing at ungodly hours of the night. She would be a hypocrite if she judged him, though. Half of the pens they owned were probably on her desk, and in the early mornings she liked to sing her favourite pop songs in the shower. They argued about who was the cause of their the noise complaints every time they received one.

They've been roommates for years now. Kay was used to Sebastian's habits... except for one.

"Seb, leave the goddamn door open when you're just fixing your hair! I need the hairspray!"

It took a long time for Sebastian to break the habit of placing barriers between them when it wasn't necessary (Kay had grown up in a home with open doors and open hearts; she wants the same for Sebastian), and eventually he stopped locking the door behind him every time he entered a room. Kay respected Sebastian's need for privacy. But she also respected their friendship, and that's why she knew that what she was about to do was not only expected, but acceptable in their tiny apartment. She took a step back, lifted her leg and opened the door with one swift kick.

There was a high-pitched yelp from Sebastian, who had styling gel on his hands, a strand of hair sticking up on his head, and an unimpressed expression on his face as he saw Kay's triumphant smile. "I-I was almost done!"

"You always say that, and then you end up taking another thirty minutes," Kay replied, grabbing her hair spray and securing her high ponytail right there. Sebastian's face scrunched at the smell. She sprayed a little bit of the product in his hair, too. They both laughed, doing the finishing touches on both of their party looks together.

After a final once-over from each of them ("The green button-up was a good choice, right, Kay?" "Yeah, but what about this silver skirt?"), they were ready to go to the new year's party. It was at Miles's house this year, and if they both weren't used to bothering him at every location possible, it might have felt a bit weird to party at the boss's place.

When they arrived at Miles's house, the host himself greets them. Although he does look genuinely pleased to see them, his smile turns strained when Kay tells him to "prepare for trouble, and make it double". While Sebastian is making small talk with Edgeworth, Kay lets her mind trail elsewhere— to the reason she was so eager to get to the party in the first place.

Maya Fey had been in Kura'in for a while now. Despite their friendship being long-distance, they were still very close. Their bond was just as strong as Kay's with Sebastian, although she felt very different about Maya than him. Kay's heart soared every time her phone dinged with a new message. She circled dates on the calendar with a violet marker whenever they planned to video chat. The time difference was brutal, but Kay would gladly stay up late just to hear Maya's voice.

"Waiting for s-someone special?" Sebastian's teasing voice broke Kay out of her thoughts. She hadn't even realized that Miles was long gone. The only one next to her was her best friend, who was looking extra smug. Of course Sebastian knew about her crush. He was the one Kay would go to at one in the morning, bombarding him with texts and asking him if he thought there was a deeper meaning to them. The deeper meaning, he would tell her, is that you both like each other and it's only a matter of time before one of you make a move. He was being ridiculous, of course. Just because Maya called her pretty and laughed a little too loud at her jokes and had a purple heart emoji next to her contact name didn't mean anything.

Okay, it definitely meant something, but Kay wasn't going to take the first step and confess or anything because... she was shy. Ugh. She wasn't used to being shy. Sebastian was the shy one, not her. But Kay hadn't seen Maya in person in what felt like forever (it had been six months), so who knows. Maybe she would make a move.

"Hey, there she is!"

Kay's head shot up, pure enthusiasm with a twinge of anxiousness filling her whole body. She looked to where Sebastian was pointing, and there she was.

Maya Fey was here. Maya Fey was looking around the room. Maya Fey was making eye contact with her. Maya Fey was walking towards her.

"Hey!" Maya Fey's voice sounded so much more real when it wasn't through a speakerphone, all light and chipper. Kay wasn't sure how she'd survive the night, let alone make a move.

"Hi, Maya!" Sebastian greeted, holding out his arms and allowing a brief hug. Maya showed her affection through touch: high fives, hair ruffles, and hand holding. Kay was the same which was one of the reasons why their long distance communication was difficult. You couldn't embrace someone through a screen.

Then Maya turned towards her, arms outstretched, and Kay found herself being pulled in like a magnet. Maya's hugs were warm and welcoming. She didn't miss how they both lingered, the hug lasting many seconds longer than a hug Kay would have with any other friend, even Sebastian. But eventually they had to (slowly) pull away.

"It seems like forever since I've seen you!" Maya exclaimed, looking up at Kay with a big grin. "You look great! I love your skirt!"

Kay's brain seemed to short-circuit. Maya was wearing a cute pink party dress and her long hair was in its usual style, decorated with sparkly hair clips. Her lips were shiny with a purple gloss. It was a light shade, like lavender. Was this weird, just staring at her lips? She needed to respond before it got weird. "Thanks! I love your lip gloss!"

Okay, so now Maya had solid proof that she was staring at her lips. Oops. But Maya just smiled at her. "Haha, thanks! Do you guys want a drink? I saw Miles bought the good champagne."

Had he? Kay didn't even notice. Sebastian nods and then a minute later Maya is offering her a drink. Kay takes the glass, and tries not to think about the brush of Maya's fingers against hers too much.

Conversation is easy. Maya asks what they've been up to since the last time they talked. Kay feels like this question is more for Sebastian, since her and Maya just talked this morning on the phone. Sebastian tells her about his latest case (not a murder, thankfully), and Kay includes details from her perspective as the detective assigned. She's sure she had mentioned this case to Maya before, but Maya seems very interested anyways.

When they ask what news Maya has, she perks up tremendously. "I've finally mastered the bowl without falling on my face!"

Recently, Maya has taken up skateboarding while in Kura'in. Pearl has been the one teaching her; she was very talented, and had a cool skateboard with a flame design on the sides. Kay had been blessed with many cute selfies of Maya in her skating gear (lavender knee and elbow pads, and a florescent pink helmet that could probably blind a person if they stared too long at it) and ten second clips of her skating around in sunglasses, striking poses at the camera. Maya was a beginner but she refused to give up, despite the constant complaining of bumps and bruises from falling all the time.

"Really?" Kay gasps. She's received many texts about the bowl, and according to Maya it was one of the most difficult things to master in her life. ("It's harder than channeling spirits, Kay! Stop laughing, it's the truth!") Kay had never skateboarded before so she felt like she couldn't judge but it certainly didn't look easy.

Maya quickly pulls her phone out of her dress pocket. "Let me show you. Pearly got it on tape! Proof that I'm not making it up to sound cool or anything."

Kay believed her. Maya wouldn't need to make stuff up to sound cool. She unlocked her phone (Kay felt herself blush at the lockscreen— it's a selfie that they had taken the last time Kay was in Kura'in, a trip that was impulsive and expensive but she didn't regret it one bit) and pulled up a video of Maya on top of the bowl. Pearl can be heard off-camera shouting encouragement. Then Maya adjusts her helmet, balances herself on her board, and slides down the bowl in one swift movement. She skids to a stop once she's on the ground. The last thing they hear before the video cuts out is Maya and Pearl screaming with excitement.

"That's so cool!" Kay exclaims, genuinely impressed.

Sebastian's eyes are nearly bugging out of his head. "Whoa! You look like a pro-professional skateboarder!"

"Yeah, this makes all the times I fell down on my butt worth it," Maya says, grinning from ear to ear. They talk some more before Maya goes to mingle with an old friend.

"Hey, do either of you know where Nick is? I want to bug him before the year ends."

Sebastian points Phoenix out across the room, where he is currently distracted by his daughter Trucy pulling an comically long scarf out of the tiny pocket on her blouse. A mischievous smile, a wave of her hand, and Maya's off.

There's a brief silence as they watch Maya leave. Sebastian turns to Kay with the same shit-eating grin he has when he's about to say something clever. "Kay? I diagnose you with gay. Lesbianism, if you want to be specific."

Kay groans. "I know, I know."

"Well, it's clear that she likes you, too, so I don't see what the con-conundrum is."

Kay believed that she was a relatively logical person. Her field of work made use of that trait, tested it. And now she was being presented with more evidence and a restless witness. The pieces fit together perfectly— Maya Fey liked her. The only question was what she going to do with this information.

"Was I... obvious about it?"

Sebastian raises his eyebrow. Takes a long sip of of his drink. "Is that a trick question?"

Not everyone Mr. Edgeworth invited was at the party, but the house is noisy regardless. Friends and acquaintances are talking in groups, there's music coming from an unknown source, the television is playing a new year's special, and Kay's heart is beating up a storm. Despite all of the activity, Kay thinks her heart is the loudest thing in this place.

Sebastian is tapping his fingers against the table next to them. Another noise, although it's muffled by the black gloves he's wearing. "Well, I know you don't like champagne."

Kay looks down at the drink Maya gave her, still full. The condensation from the glass mixes with the sweat on her palm. The feeling of Maya's hand brushing against hers lingers.

In the distance, Maya nudges Phoenix roughly in the side, and his drink splashes on his shirt. Maya laughs and then points at the stain, exclaiming loudly that it kind of looks like the Blue Badger. Phoenix seems to push his annoyance aside to carefully examine his sleeve. Maya calls other people over to look, a light yet determined expression on her face, and Kay can feel herself fall a little more in love.

...

The flashy countdown screen on the TV lights up, signaling the last minute of the year. Kay smiles and swirls the untouched champagne in her glass. She's lost in the way the tiny bubbles cling onto the sides of the cup until something distracts her. Or more accurately, someone.

"Hey," Maya says, placing her own glass on the table in front of them.

"Hey," Kay echoes back intelligently. She places her glass next to Maya's as her friend (she ignores the tightening in her chest when she calls her that; she's not sure there's a single word in this world to describe what Maya is to her) sits down next to her.

There's a moment of silence between them. Maya smells like jasmine and nostalgia. Kay wants to look but she's glowing like the sun, so she decides to play it safe and stare ahead. She sees Sebastian and Klavier talking about something, but she can't concentrate enough on their voices to know the topic.

Maya's voice snaps Kay out of her trance. "Happy new year."

For a split second, Kay thinks she miscounted the seconds, and missed the celebration. She checks the television quickly, and sighs with relief. "You're about thirty seconds too early, but I appreciate your enthusiasm." Then she had to use all of her strength to resist the urge to kick herself for sounding so weird.

"Oh." Cheeks flushed red for sure, Kay risks a glance at Maya. She doesn't regret it. She doesn't think she'll ever get tired of seeing Maya smile. "Happy new year's eve, then?"

She barely pulls herself together before responding in a passably-normal-although-probably-too-eager tone. "Yeah! Happy new year's eve!"

Maya laughs at that, and Kay can physically feel her heart soar. She knows it's bad to look at the sun but she can't help it, and within seconds she's pretty sure she could map out all the freckles on Maya's face. Kay stares too long to pass as normal and she knows it. But Maya is staring, too.

"TEN SECONDS!" Kay doesn't recognizes whose enthusiastic yelling the voice belongs to, but she doesn't even bother tearing her eyes away from Maya.

Ten.

Maya is sitting so close to her that their thighs are touching. How did Kay not notice that until now?

Nine.

Maya hesitantly reaches over and touches Kay's hand with her own.

Eight.

Her hand is shaking slightly. It's sweaty, too. Kay doesn't complain. She's probably the same.

Seven.

Kay curls their fingers together. She can't seem to stop smiling.

Six.

There's no denying it. The walls between them tumble down to reveal something a bit more than friendship, a bit more than just simple attraction.

Five.

Kay wants to say something, anything, but she's been rendered speechless. She's pretty sure she looks ridiculous. Ridiculously lovestruck.

Four.

Maya's other hand reaches over to brush Kay's hair out of her face, and her touch lingers near her cheek.

Three.

There's a line that they haven't neared, trying to maintain their friendship. Maya is standing at the edge of it, threatening to cross over.

Two.

Maya tilts her head, leans in, and closes her eyes. Kay can't hear the music over her heartbeat pounding in her ears.

One.

Kay closes her eyes, leans in, and unconsciously holds her breath.

"HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

Their lips met, and Kay smudges Maya's lavender lip gloss.

[blackcatanna]

Phoenix Wright: Rise from the Ashes OPINIONS

Greetings, Tumblrinos! I have FINALLY aquired the original Ace Attorney trilogy on PC and have just finished the first game. I didn’t have any issues with the first four cases BUT I have a lot of UNANSWERED QUESTIONS about the fifth case, which was not in the original game. There were many things I loved about it (it gave me so much delicious evidence to play with) but I feel like its long, complicated plot had a few more HOLES than I like to see in a game all about finding contradictions and I have to SHOUT MY QUESTIONS/OPINIONS TO THE GREAT TUMBLR VOID so heeeeere we go! :D SPOILERS (duh)!!!

NUMBER ONE: WHY did Gant MURDER NEIL MARSHALL?!??!?

This is never addressed in the game, which I found very odd. This case is, I think, the longest in the main series and yet it ended SO SUDDENLY?!? Gant admitted how he killed Goodman to stop him reopening the case but he never gave a motive for killing poor Marshall AND SO I am left to speculate.

Of course, we know that Gant wanted to control the prosecuters and so it’s reasonable to think that he did it purely to frame Ema and thus get Lana under his thumb. However, he states that his motive for collecting evidence against Ema was simply “insurance” in case the case was examined too closely...? Is he lying? He might lie in order to distance himself from Lana and Goodman’s murder but then he goes and confesses anyway so why would he bother to do that?

Okay, so, murdering Neil worked out pretty well for Gant. He was promoted, Lana was promoted and he had leverage over Lana AND SO it looks like Gant purely wanted to frame Ema and that’s why he killed Neil. HOWEVER, this is still WEIRD AF. 

Okay, so, in order for this to be EVEN REMOTELY PLAUSIBLE, Gant would have to be on the extreme end of murderous psychopathy. To murder your colleague who’s UNCONSCIOUS is just... It’s insane behaviour. He killed Goodman because Goodman was a threat. Marshall was just... THERE. ALSO, he’s have to be a huge hypocrite! Gant says that he did everything because he hates criminals and wants to catch them, no matter what AND YET HE LIFTS UP AN UNCONSCIOUS MAN, IMPALES HIM ON A SWORD AND PATS HIMSELF ON THE BACK FOR CONVICTING DARKE?!?! AND HE SEES NO ISSUES HERE?!?! 

Furthermore, I don’t think that any of this was necessary to convict Darke. Lana seems to think so but it looks like Marshall and Gant had pretty much cracked Darke when he made a run for it. Lana wasn’t there for the interrogation. Not sure how relevant Darke is to Gant’s motivation but it’s interesting that it’s thrown into the MOTIVATION SOUP that we’re presented with.

Therefore, it appears that Gant killed Neil because he believed that it was for the greater good: by controlling both the police and the prosecutors, he would be able to ensure that those he deemed to be guilty would be punished. Fair enough. 

Okay, so, Gant and Lana are about to crack the case. Gant states that he’s already up for his dream job. If they succeed, Lana will be able to become Head Prosecutor. SO all that Gant needs is leverage over Lana. BUT SURELY, she already admires and respects him. They’ve been partners for years. They’ve cracked many cases together. They are the dream team! Pretty sure they even have a name in game like “Dynamic Duo” or something... “Legendary Duo”, thank you, Google. Presumably, Lana trusts Gant. He could give her forged evidence or omit things and she would most likely use it without ever knowing, much like Miles Edgeworth did. 

SO, if Gant hadn’t killed Neil and framed Ema/Darke, Lana would most likely still be Queen Prosecutor and would trust Gant. So, not only did he take a HUGE RISK killing Neil (MORE ON THAT LATER), he also jeopardised the valuable relationship of trust between himself and Lana, replacing it with BLACKMAIL. Perhaps, blackmail might seem like a more solid bond to someone as TWISTED as Gant BUT there are two problems with this blackmail.

FIRSTLY, there is the possibility that the person being blackmailed will SNAP. This doesn’t seem to be a huge risk with Lana. SECONDLY, this blackmail is based on LIES. It potentially becomes USELESS if someone figures out that Ema is not responsible so he’d have to believe that he’d left no traces (so I guess we can add HUBRIS to his list of character flaws). Oh, and this brings up another problem. In order to follow through on his threats to Lana, he’d have to admit that he covered up the truth in the first place! 

Okay, so I have decided that killing Neil didn’t accomplish that much of a REWARD for Gant so let’s look at the RISK. He PICKED UP an unconscious, fully grown man without disturbing the other two unconscious people in the room or Neil himself. The building was full of people for the award ceremony, presumably. To be fair, it took place in Gant’s office and so it’s unlikely that anyone else would walk in but the office had massive windows! 

Although unlikely, the possibilty of someone else witnessing Gant’s murder definitely existed. Furthermore, there was the more likely possibility of someone IN THE ROOM regaining consciousness and catching him in the act. Darke had hit his head, but Ema had merely fainted and I can’t believe that Marshall never regained consciousness while someone cut out a segment from his waistcoat, PICKED HIM UP and SKEWERED HIM ON A SPIKE. I mean, c’mon. Even if you agree that it’s possible that he didn’t get woken up by being impaled, how would Gant be so sure that this wouldn’t happen. 

The more I talk about this, the more questions I have but I MUST SAVE THEM FOR NOW. 

Okay, so Gant walks into the room, sees three unconscious people and thinks, “Gee! I could totally do a murder right now and frame one of these people, tee-hee. OMG if I make it look like Ema did it, Lana will TOTALLY have to do what I say, like, for EVER.” So, Gant does a murder and tries to cover it up but leaves A FRIGGIN’ HUGE OBVIOUS TRAIL BEHIND HIM THAT ANY IDIOT COULD SPOT, HOLY COW. IN FACT, WE’RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT THAT NOW. 

WHY DID NOBODY QUESTION THAT THERE WAS A SQUARE CUT OUT OF MARSHALL’S WAISTCOAT??! THIS IS SO OBVIOSLY HIDING EVIDENCE!!! LANA EVEN HAD A PHOTO OF HIM WITH THE SQUARE MISSING AND A PHOTO OF HIM TAKEN MINUTES BEFORE WITH AN INTACT WAISTCOAT!!! NOBODY THOUGHT TO POINT THIS OUT?!?!?

WHY THE FLYING FUCK WOULD MARSHALL WRITE EMA’S NAME ON THE WOBBLY VASE?!?! This particular piece of evidence didn’t come to light until the current trial but it’s just so stupid! Obviously, Ema didn’t try to kill Marshall. It was an accident. Why would Marshall think, “I must not let this demon child get away with this heinous crime!” and use his last strength to do this nonsense. Furthermore, HE WAS IMPALED ON A SWORD. HE COULDN’T HAVE REACHED THE VASE. HE WAS TOTALLY SKEWERED. 

Speaking of that ugly-ass vase, did none of this top notch investigation team try and piece it together? Presumably, they did. That would bring up the question of the missing piece. Gant, you idiot! No wonder all of the investigators were suspicious. 

I guess that Gant thought he was untouchable and could just shut anything down with his authority but he made such a mess of everything that he was caught out by many people and eventually had to resort to  the ol’ Stabby Stabby just to shut people up. Gant’s supposed to be this brilliant person but he just comes across as an idiot with a TERRIBLE personality. I feel like a lot of Ace Attorney villains slip up because they’re in positions of power and think that they’re untouchable but I think that this is the stupidest one I’ve encountered so far. 

Okay, so, ASTONISHINGLY, Gant’s plan works. He gets away with THE MURDER and now it’s time for some sweet, sweet blackmail... He tells Lana that Ema will be convicted of murder if the truth gets out. Wait, WHAT??!?! HOW!? IN WHAT UNIVERSE COULD EMA BE SEEN TO BE GUILTY OF MURDER. Manslaughter, perhaps but she was acting in self defense! She pushed a guy wielding a knife. I DO NOT BUY THIS AT ALL. It seems likely to me that Lana would still co-operate because she was afraid of letting Ema know that she was responsible for Neil’s death but that seems to me to be the extent of the hold he has over Lana. Lana claims to have sold her soul for this. Does she believe that it’s worth it to spare her sister from the truth? Perhaps.

SO, IN SUMMARY, in order for this to be any kind of plausible, Gant has to be EXTREMELY SOCIOPATHIC, HUBRISTIC, HYPOCRITICAL and brimming with, my favourite, UNFATHOMABLE STUPIDITY! The UNFATHOMABLE STUPIDITY is what I have the biggest problem with. He is supposed to be SMART and CAPABLE. So are the rest of the team assigned to the serial killer case. I just, ugh... It doesn’t make sense... 

NUMBER 2 (finally): WHERE’S THE BLOOD, BITCH?

Why is there so much blood by Lana’s desk in Gant’s office? Neil died on the other side of the room AND YET there is no trace of blood to be found there! I sprayed the HECK out of that suit of armour and there was NOTHING. If Neil was skewered there, he would, PRESUMABLY have bled A LOT. Also when they UN-SKEWERED HIM. In fact, we know that he was coughing up LOADS OF BLOOD while he was skewered, thanks to Lana’s photo. SO, WHY. IS. THERE. NO. BLOOD. THERE. Presumably, Gant had the office thoroughly cleaned in the TWO YEARS since the incident but, then, why can I still see blood in Lana’s half? And surely there would have been blood traces there two years ago when this, ALLEGEDLY, UBER-COMPETANT TEAM investigated? 

Number 3: WHY THE EVERLOVING FLYING FUCK did the police decide that Goodman had been MURDERED in the evidence room?!??!

What did the police find to lead them to believe that a murder had been committed?!? They had a video showing someone dressed like Goodman entering the evidence room, followed by that annoying af megaphone guy, who got beaten up, cut on the hand and knocked unconscious. THAT’S NOT A MURDER. NOBODY DIED. THERE WAS NOTHING TO INDICATE THAT A MURDER HAD TAKEN PLACE! WHY WOULD THEY REPORT IT AS A MURDER, LET ALONE GOODMAN’S MURDER!!?!? THIS MAKES ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE!?! 

Furthermore, WHY WOULD THEY HAVE MEEKUMS DELIVER THE REPORT TO EDGEY BOY WHEN HE WAS THE ONE THEY SOMEHOW DECIDED WAS THE MURDERER?!?!? At the time, I thought that Gant sent Meekums or whatever his name was (cba to look it up because he was SO ANNOYING) because he knew that Edgeworth would ignore him because he was so annoying and he’d be able to make Edgeworth look bad in court later. But, seriously, what was even in that file? There was no murder!!! If Gant was trying to throw us off, why would he draw our attention to the evidence room and the two-year-old case?!? Whyyyyyyyy!?!?

Tbh, I have no explanation for any of this. IT DOES. NOT. COMPUTE. 

THING THE FOURTH: Why was Lana’s hand not bleeding in Angel’s photo?

Lana says that she cut her hand because she was shaking while stabbing Goodman’s corpse. YET, Angel’s photo VERY CLEARLY shows her without any injury. Angel ran down to the car park because she saw Lana stabbing Goodman. Therefore, by the time Angel took the photo, Lana must have already stabbed the guy. Also, Angel states that she saw Lana stab Goodman repeatedly and that she was wearing a muffler. So, the stabbity stabbity must have happened before the photo was taken. 

Question the Fifth: Who the Hell calls an exhaust pipe a “muffler”?!?!

Well, I just googled it and it’s something that reduces noise coming from the exhaust pipe. Yay learning!

Question the Sixth: Why did the cameras not catch Gant giving Goodman the old stabby stabby? 

Presumably, Gant erased the footage immediately after exiting the room but this was never addressed, for some reason. I guess it was already a long af case but I like details, dammit!

7: How did Gant clean up so quickly?!?

Bruce Goodman died of bloodloss. That’s A LOT of blood to clean up! He summoned Edgeworth to the room to collect the screwdriver only 20 minutes after he himself first entered the evidence room with Goodman. In those twenty minutes, he must have had the fight with Goodman, waited for him to stop bleeding, moved the body, stuffed it into Edgeworth’s trunk, found cleaning products, mopped up ALL THE BLOOD from a guy who DIED OF BLOODLOSS, hiden whatever it was that soaked up the blood (slorp), erased the video footage and somehow not got ANY BLOOD on himself and WASN’T SEEN by ANYONE stuffing a body into a car ON THE DAY OF DATA TRANSFERENCE!?!? HOW?!

8: Seriously, how many identical white detective coats are there?!?!

Marshall wears one to impersonate Goodman, Goodman is wearing one when he is MURDERED, Lana is wearing one in Angel’s photo and, weirdly, it has a bloodstain on it in the same place that Marshall’s one does. However, we can still see Marshall’s costume coat sticking out of his locker. WEIRD. 

SO YEAH

This concludes my list of puzzling things in this episode! There are probably more random things that I’ve forgotten but, in that case, they can’t be bugging me too much. What really IRKS me is the question of the “murder” in the evidence room and how UNFATHOMABLY STUPID everyone, especially Gant was 2 years ago. These two things just make the episode feel a bit incomplete to me. I admire the ambition of this episode but I feel like some things slipped through the cracks and left my brain aching for the wrong reasons.

[sukorakurai]

Phoenix Wright Ace Barista

A/N: Okay this was written by me and my son for his creative writing assignment when he was in his freshman year. I was so Proud of him. I thought I would had to post it for the fond Memories. I hope you enjoyed it.

***---***---***---***---

May 12th, 1:45 p.m. Court No.3. What a beautiful day in sunny California. Everyone is up and charged for the day, everyone but one tired and exhausted defense attorney. Phoenix Wright drags himself from the courtroom to the lunch counter. “How was your day Mr. Wright?” Phoenix looks over his shoulder to see Apollo, his young and cheerful junior lawyer, standing behind him holding a half eaten blueberry muffin in his hand.

 “Hello Apollo, do you have to be so cheerful?”

 “Sorry?” the young lawyer looked to his boss in question.

 “Never mind. To answer your question, I have not been having a good day.” Phoenix growled as he pushed his lonely doughnut and coffee to the cashier.  Lucky for him he managed to have enough change for the meager lunch.

 “Really, Mr. Wright, what happened?” Apollo followed Phoenix to an empty table and sat across from the tired attorney.

 “Well my young friend I will tell you. Be warned this story is not for the faint of Heart. It all started this morning when my Alarm clock went off waking me up at 5am. A whole hour before it was supposed to go off. It pissed me off so much I knocked it off the side table. The impact with the wall rendered it unusable for the foreseeable future. Since I didn’t have an alarm there was no point to going back to sleep other wise I would oversleep. So I got into the shower where I got a rude awakening. Turns out my building shut the hot water off so that the boiler could be repair. It would have been nice to have warning but the sign in the Lobby was too small to notice. So after a lovely shower under a freezing rain I got around to making breakfast. Well, it would have been breakfast had the milk not expired. I guess it had been awhile since I went to the store but I didn’t think it had been that long. I mean there were chunks of milk in my cereal. Anyway skipping breakfast I headed out to my First Job of the day.”

 “Wait, First Job? Mr. Wright you already have a job. You are the top defense Attorney in the city! Why would you need more than one job!?”

 “Well, I might be the top Defense Attorney in San Francisco but that doesn’t mean a thing when my clients only pay me IOU’s. Now to keep our office afloat I’ve had to pick up an odd job or two. I managed to get a part-time job at the Local coffee shop near the courthouse, it saves on the commute.”

 “Oh, you mean you are the manager?”

 “Not, Exactly.”

 “Hey Wright, next time I order my Venti Caramel Macchiato try not to drown it in foam. It totally watered down the espresso!” shouted Miles Edgeworth the lead Prosecutor in San  Francisco.

 “Don’t worry I won’t forget.” Phoenix gritted his teeth not wanting to start a shouting match in the cafeteria.

 “See that you don’t and don’t be late for court. I have a solid witness, that you can’t break, you need to be ready for me to put your client away.” Edgeworth smirked leaving the two attorneys to finish their lunch.

 “I really hate that guy. Anyways like I was saying I got a job as a Barista.”

 “Oh, I see. I take Mr. Edgeworth was a customer today.” Apollo said understanding the strife his employer was under.

 “You got it, but I’m getting ahead of myself. So I went to work this morning at 7 a.m. I got there just in time to see the line forming out the door and around the block. I was put work right away and about five customers into my shift disaster struck.”

 Flashback

 “Oh Nick! I didn’t know you worked here!”

 “Morning Maya, What can I get you?” I sighed. Not that I don’t like my Client/assistant but she could be a little chatty.

 “How funny is that, you are working here of all places? Well I should have seen it coming. Hey, since you’re the barista can you make mine EXTRA special? As in better than EVERYONE else’s you’ve made for so far? Because I’m a very close friend.”

 “No. Besides you didn’t even order any-”

 “Aww, why not?”

 “Doing that might lose my job. And you still haven’t ordered somethi-”

 “But, Niiiiiick.”

 “No means no. Are you even going to get anythi-”

  “Pleeeeeeaaaaase?”

 “No.

 “Niiiiiiiiiick.”

 It went on like that for five minutes before I finally got her to order a hot green tea with extra lemon. The next few customer went too happy after having wait so long to get their orders in. eventually things smoothed out until Edgeworth decided to “grace” me with his presences.

 “Oh how the mighty have fallen. Nice, apron Wright.”

 “Morning Edgeworth ,what can I get you?”

 “I’ll have a Venti Caramel Macchiato easy on the foam.”

 “Fine, that will be $6.50.”

 “You know Wright, we’re up against each other in court today. I have put together a rock solid case. Not only is your client guilty but I’m going to make sure he gets the maximum sentence.”

 “The minimum sentence is the death penalty. How can you get worse than that?”

 “WRIGHT STOP ARGUING WITH THE CUSTOMERS AND GET BACK TO WORK!” our discussion was cut short do to the manager yelling at me.

 “Yes, sir! Here’s your change now go wait for you name to be called.”

 “Very well, see you in court, Wright.”

 After Lord High Mighty left Things didn’t get any easier. Two of our five coffee/espresso machines broke. This caused a huge delay in service but there wasn’t anything we could do about it.

 “Next.” I said asking for the next person in line. The next person walked to the counter.” Good morning sir, what would you like to-...JUDGE!?”

 “Nothing right now, I start judging at noon though.”

 “Since when did you ever leave the courtroom!”

 “Actually pretty often, just the other day I went to get some groceries.”

  “And why are you in your robes? It’s only 8:30.”

 “These are also my pajamas.”

 “TMI.”

 “What?”

 “TMI, Too Much Information. I did not need nor want to know that. Anyways, what would you like to order?”

 “Just plain old black coffee.”

 “That will be $4.75. Go and wait for your name to be called. What is your name? I don’t think I’ve ever heard it before.”

 “Judge.”

 “Your name is Judge?”

 “Yes I had it legally changed when I took to the bench.”

 “What was it before?”

 “Prosecutor.”

 End Flashback

 “That was when I felt like ramming my head against the nearest brick wall but there was none to be had so I finished out my shift and barely made it to court. Then before opening Statements the Judge addresses the courtroom and tells them I make a damn fine cup off coffee and everyone should go to the coffee shop tomorrow to try my coffee.”

 “Hey Mr. Wright?” Apollo looked to Phoenix with hope in his eyes.

 “Yeah?” Now the older attorney looked at his junior lawyer wearily.

 “When are your shifts everyday?”

 “7:00 a.m. to 10 a.m. Why do you ask?”

 “I was hoping to get something that I believe only you can make.”

 “What, No!” Phoenix reared back in horror. He couldn’t believe it, even Apollo wanted coffee from him.

 “Please, Sir? I this a Venti Salted Caramel Mocha Frappuccino with whipped cream Caramel Syrup and Chocolate Truffle shavings on top. I’ve been saving for two whole months to get it.” The young attorney practically drooling just at the thought of the expensive treat.

 “Is this why you haven’t been helping pay rent for our office?”

 “Well you seemed to have it covered I didn’t think you that you mind.” Apollo wilted under the Famous Wright Glare.  “So will you make it for me?”

 “No.” Phoenix had all he could take of this conversation and started to head back to court.

 “Come on sir, Please! I promise I’ll Start paying rent!” Apollo scrambled to follow his mentor.

 “NO! You better start paying rent anyways!” and that was the last as the courtroom doors closed locking Apollo out.

  THE END

[aquilamage]

Finally got the first segment of this fic to a point where I’m pretty satisfied! It’s pretty much buildup to the main focus of the story (which is basically gonna be a fake relationship fic), but it was really fun still. Putting up what i have so far to kind of celebrate

Kay swung one leg as she watched down the street from her perch. The afternoon sun had nicely warmed the brick of the wall, making the wait easier to bear, what with the occasional mid-spring breezes coming through. It was beginning to border on late, but she was relaxed as ever.

It was just as she had gotten distracted enough to start cooing at a bird that had landed a few feet from her that someone called out her name.

Ignoring the stares of passerby, Kay leaped down onto the sidewalk (with only the slightest flourish). To be almost immediately barreled into and caught up in a hug.

“Kay!” Loosening her grip enough to tilt her head up, Maya beamed at her. “It’s been way too long.”

She pouted. “Says the one who spent the last two months in a remote village that has no service and one phone.”

Maya scoffed, shoving her away and crossing her arms. “Says the one who’s out of the country like a third of the time.”

“Well, I’m here now, aren’t I?”

“Yeah…” Despite herself, she couldn’t help but smile a bit. “Now come on!” Taking her arm, she started dragging her off. “We’ve got things to talk about.”

She only dropped her grip when Kay started giggling as they entered a nearby restaurant. “What?”

Kay only smirked, raising her eyebrows.

“Look, I have been back for a day,” she said as she made her way to the counter without bothering to make sure she was being followed. “and it is impossible to get a decent burger in Kurain. On top of everything else I’ve been dealing with, I definitely deserve to get something good for myself.”

“Things still not going so well?”

A tiny smile. “Actually…” She clasped her hands together in front of herself. “Things are finally coming together! They’ve only just put the council system in place, and I’m probably going to have to be there to “supervise” so they can feel comfortable doing it, but…” Maya took a deep breath. “If everything works out, it’ll probably be five months, tops, before I can leave for good.”

Kay let out a shriek before remembering where she was and slapping her hands over her mouth. Bouncing up and down, she pulled Maya into a hug. “That’s amazing! I’m so happy for you!”

“Thanks. Oh, it’s our turn to order.”

When they stepped away from the counter, Kay threw her another grin. “Seriously, that’s awesome. And now that you have an actual end in sight,” she said, recalling a number of conversations they had had over the years, “that means we can actually talk about plans for after without it being too sad. Right?”

She wrapped her arms around herself, head resting on one shoulder. “Yeah. But that’s going to be a whole big thing, so save that for later.” Maya poked her in the side. “How about you? What’ve you been up to without me to entertain you?

“Eh, not too much. School, mostly, since I got back from the last trip, and the investigation was actually pretty normal this time.” Kay played with her scarf. Then she paused, the beginnings of a grin forming. “Oh. Want to see the candids of Mr. Edgeworth I took on my last trip?”

She turned to look almost immediately. “Yes.”

Pulling up the album on her phone, she handed it over before heading over to the counter to pick up their food. “There’s only a couple from this time, but they’re still pretty good. Haven’t had time to put them in the Edgeworth album so they’re still in with the other stuff from that trip but help yourself.”

By the time Kay got over with their trays, Maya was sprawled out over her side of the table, the occasional giggle coming out as she clutched the phone. She only responded once nudged with the edge of her tray, drawing herself up and pulling the food towards her. Through her first mouthful, she held up the phone and asked, “What is he doing in this one?”

“Oh yeah.” Kay had to take a second to compose herself before answering. “He had gotten the in-flight internet to watch that stream Global Studios had announced, and he was getting so upset about the fact that they were just talking about remastering the original Steel Samurai when they had hyped it up like there was actually going to be something new. So I took some pictures of him from across the aisle.”

“Nice.” She remembered being disappointed that she was going to be in Kurain at the time, and had pestered Nick until he promised to check what it was about for her. When she’d read his letter about it she’d been pretty disappointed too.

There were a few moments of quiet where they both sat eating. Then, Maya practically choked on her drink. Coughing, she turned the phone so they both could see it. “Is this what I think it is?”

“Uh huh! My pride and joy.” She took a triumphant bite of one of her fries. “We were going to have breakfast together but I got up a bit later and saw him already down there. So I did what any reasonable person would and hid behind one of the plants with the zoom on. His fault, really, for eating something he’d have to take big bites into and potentially get bits of on his face.” The smile faded as she winced and continued. “I did, however, forget that I had the sound left on. So…”

Reaching over, she slid through the next few photos. Miles Edgeworth, seated at a table, looking rather outraged and only starting to turn in the camera’s direction. One of him standing up, closer but slightly out of focus and obscured by leaves. And then a series of very blurry pictures of a red figure, clearly taken over her shoulder in selfie mode.

“Fortunately, I managed to lock my phone before he caught up to me, but I did spend the rest of the morning in my room until he cooled down. Had to get Sebastian to sneak me food and everything.” She sighed fondly.

“It sounds like you guys have a lot of fun.” The wistful tone in Maya’s voice was impossible to miss, especially given the way she was picking at her food now.

Kay sat twisting her hands together. She knew where this was coming from, had heard the twinge of jealousy in her friend’s tone enough times when she discussed her own life to recognize it in an instant.

She didn’t know everything about Maya’s past, but over the couple of years since they had met, she had quickly learned that they had both experienced their share of recent loss and hardships. The difference between them during that time in many ways was due to their connections. Kay had Mr. Edgeworth and Sebastian and Franziska and Gummy and Uncle Badd, who she all saw on a semi-regular basis. On the other hand, Maya’s only solid connection in Kurain was her cousin, who she was enough of an older sibling/caregiver to already that talking about her problems with her as an equal was practically impossible. And outside of that, the only friend of hers Kay knew of was Mr. Wright, and during their previous meeting Maya had confided that she could tell he was struggling more, and seemed to only be pushing her further and further away, but wouldn’t talk about what was going on.

“You could come next time, if you want.”

Maya puffed out her cheeks, frowning as she dropped her chin in her hands. “I don’t see how much help I’d be,” she muttered. “I’m not a lawyer or a detective or anything useful.”

The chord of absolute resignation Kay could hear in her voice pained her to hear, and she rushed to reassure her. “Neither am I. Well, yet,” she added, more quietly. “But you can keep me company while we help investigate!”

“I guess.” She was tracing patterns on the table with the rings of water from their glasses. “You decided on detective, then?”

Oh, good, looked like she was getting distracted from spiraling, and she wasn’t disagreeing with her suggestion any more. Still, Kay made a mental note to bother Franziska about asking her to help next time she was in the country with something as well. “Ehh, no. I don’t know. I still like the idea of being security consultant for investigations too. Then I can really put my skills as a Great Thief to use!”

Maya laughed. After a moment, she pulled herself back into sitting up. A much happier, if still in the neutral territory, expression was on her face as she dug back into her meal. “Speaking of, I should really tell you about the main reason I called you here.”

“What, you mean it wasn’t to see my beautiful face and get to catch up?”

“Why I asked if you were available today, I mean.” She began rooting through her bag. “Because I have a mission, and you’re the perfect person for it.”

Kay practically shoved her food aside, leaning over the table so practically half her torso was on it, head propped up on her steepled fingers. “Oh?” She arched an eyebrow. “What are you proposing?”

Maya, who had placed a folded paper on the table and was just in the middle of eating, choked on her burger. She finished coughing in time to look up at Kay’s puzzled expression, sending herself into another fit of coughs with how hard she was laughing. “It’s funny you should say that,” she wheezed. Her eyes lit up as she unfolded the paper and sild it across the table. “I was waiting at the train station when this caught my eye, and when I read it I knew it was meant to be. And then I thought, well…” She clasped her hands together, bouncing a little in her seat as she watched expectantly.

“You want me to pretend to be your fiancé so you can get free wedding cake samples.” Her voice was neutral as she looked up, face almost expressionless. The stare she gave stretched on just long enough that Maya was starting to get nervous before she broke out into a huge grin. “I love it. What’s the plan?”

She breathed a sigh of relief. Realistically, she had known going into this that Kay would likely agree to her plan, but despite the progress she had made, being only a couple of days gone from Kurain, she was still in that mindset of expecting to have to struggle to have her ideas be heard, and this enthusiastic response was a genuine surprise. Blinking, she noticed that tears had started to form without even noticing, and she shook her head before gesturing at the flyer. “So, it’s tomorrow afternoon at their main bakery location. There’s a park like a block from there, so I was thinking we meet there so we can pretend we came together. Sound good?”

Kay nodded. Really, she was down with whatever Maya had in mind, since she wasn’t overly invested in it. Not that she didn’t want to be involved, but right now Kay was more in it because she knew Maya really wanted this and seeing her smile made her happy. And besides, it did seem like it would be fun. “Get there a few minutes before it starts so by the time we’re ready we’ll still have maximum cake time?”

Deciding to try something, Maya winked at her. “See, this is exactly why we’re engaged. You’re far too good to me,” she said, placing a hand over her heart.

Blowing an exaggerated kiss, she rolled her eyes. “And here I thought you loved me for my dashing good looks and stunning personality.”

They stared at each other for only a moment before they both burst out into laughter.

“This is fun. I was worried it’d get weird.” Maya pushed her bangs back. “It’s not, right? Just, obviously we’re going to have to be convincingly enough of a couple that no one’s going to question us, so, you know.” She rubbed the back of her neck as she talked, busying herself with finishing the remnants of her meal as soon as she stopped. Seeing that she had played along quite enthusiastically, it seemed fine, but Maya also didn’t want to push.

“It’s not weird. And I’m pretty sure we’re already decently convincing; good romantic relationships are usually built on being friends anyway.” A pause as she tapped her fingers on the table. “That and communication. Point is, apart from leaning into being more verbally and physically affectionate, we shouldn’t need to worry about much.”

The casual sincerity of the first sentence alone had relaxed her, enough so that she was now reaching over to steal a handful of fries from the other tray. “Cool. Although, speaking of, there are a few things we should get straight,” she said, and then immediately snorted.

“Oh, that will be a problem.” Kay laughed helplessly. “Pretty sure the whole idea here’s to act gayer than usual, not less.”

“Yeah, that was pretty unfortunate wording.” She reached over for another fry, only to smack her hand against the basket when Kay tried to slide it over to her. “Anyway, communication. What we most need, in order to pull this off, is an airtight understanding of the fiction of our dating history. Otherwise we’ll end up giving completely different answers to a question, and that could be real bad.”

Kay snapped her fingers. “Oooh that’s a good point.” Sliding over so she could lean into the corner where the booth met the wall, she propped her head up with one arm and watched Maya finishing off her food. “Go back and forth with what would be the most likely topics and then go from there?”

A nod. “How long have we been together?”

“Ehh...Two years. First meeting?”

Maya contemplated the ice cubes at the bottom of her glass for a moment before answering, “Go with the truth, probably. It’ll be much easier for us to remember that way. But for things we have to make up… what about how we actually started dating?”

“You asked me out when I got back from my second trip away after we met. I gave you this scarf I had found in a shop and you started crying and told me you loved me.” Her expression softened. “It was really cute.”

Crossing her arms, she tossed her head. “Really. Making decisions about my feelings for me.” She puffed out a breath that blew her bangs out of place. “Then I’m going to say that you had planned this really elaborate proposal for after we finished an investigation that I was helping out with.” Hands on her hips, she grinned widely. “Except then I got arrested for it, and then the guy who turned out to be the accomplice to the actual murderer kidnapped me out of jail and made it look like I broke out so I would seem guilty, and someone tried to impersonate the judge…and a couple of near-explosions later you tackled me as soon as I was released and asked me then and there.”

 Kay made a face. “What does it say that that barely sounds weirder than most of the actual cases either of us has worked with?”

“That we get into a lot of weird stuff.” She shrugged. Then, a thought occurred to her. “Shit, are we going to need a ring?” What was she saying, they were pretending to be engaged, it was only the entire marker of that being a thing, of course they did.

“Uhhh, maybe? I mean, lesbians.” She waved a hand between the two of them. “If we say we’re not going with whatever traditional engagement wedding type stuff, we can pretty much get away with it. But if we want to, I have my parents’ wedding rings somewhere. As long as I can find them,” shifting back to sit directly across from Maya, she held her hands out in front of Maya’s, “we can use one of those. Can I have your hand?”

 A skeptical glance, but Maya brought her left hand over and between where Kay’s were hovering. “Yeah?”

Her attention was already focused looking down as she gently turned her wrist so her palm was facing up. “I want to see what your fingers are in comparison to mine, I can try them on and see if they’d fit you.”

Maya watched her with half-lidded eyes and a smile playing across her face, completely relaxed. Despite the fact that Kay was just as high-energy as her, possibly a little more, and the two of them often fed off one another, being around her really relaxed Maya in a way that no one else really did. Something about the way she really made an effort to understand her, she thought. She was struck with a feeling of intense gratitude that Kay had turned out to be available and willing to go through with this plan, because the more she thought about it, the more she was certain she felt more comfortable with her than anyone else she might have tried to ask.

“I think…we’re about the same size? Should make it pretty easy.” Kay had taken hold of her wrist and was flopping Maya’s hand up and down. “But what do you think we should say about other wedding plan stuff?”

Oh right. That was a whole big thing by itself, and she’d prefer not to have to become an expert in the process just to pull this whole thing off. “Well, we could say that we’re not planning on making it into a big thing, especially since we don’t have big families to deal with.” She tapped her chin. “And that it’s only been a couple weeks since the proposal, so we haven’t had a lot of time to plan anyway.”

“Ooh, that’s easy. I like it.”

They both jumped when a phone started to go off. After a moment’s scrambling, Maya held hers up to her ear.

“Trucy! What are you- oh?” She turned in her seat to check the clock on the wall. “Oh, wow, guess I lost track of time. No, it’s fine, I can be there in a few minutes. Okay, bye!” Hanging up, she gave Kay a sheepish look. “I might have promised Nick I’d walk Trucy back from school.”

She waved it away. “That’s fine. Text me when you two get home then. And I’ll let you know if I think of anything else.” She held out her arms, tilting her head in search of permission before wrapping her in a hug.

Maya rested her head against Kay’s collarbone. Safe and secure. “Yup! See you tomorrow.”

[youngbounty]

@lilietsblog I don’t consider Phoenix’s backstory generic, unless you can name me any other backstory that involves any character becoming a hero after being humiliated in school, only to be saved by his childhood friend, then become a hero to save childhood friend after he stops responding and starts acting like a jerk. Also, while there are issues with Phoenix’s backstories, the motivation is not one of those (also, they were 8-9 years old). Having only been friends for half to a full year does not make the motivation irrelevant. People can know a lot about each other in a single month. What matters is that the motivation is there and the proof being in the pudding of how far Phoenix will go for Edgeworth. However, I do agree that there is issue with Phoenix’s personality not being consistent with his backstories. Many times, it flip-flops with Phoenix being a wuss in his backstory that somehow is suppose to match up with the brave, hot-blooded character we’re supposed to be playing. Though, that has nothing to do with the issue with Apollo’s backstories (I mentioned that they improved on character development and relatability in the second and third backstory).

I never said the games never tied anything together. I am talking about Apollo’s backstories, not the games. The third does not connect anything from Apollo’s first and second backstories. Sure, you might add in your own ideas to connect them, but that doesn’t make them connect. I already explained how they don’t in my post, so I won’t repeat myself.

Phoenix’s third backstory, even as the most flawed out of the two as it is, at least has a concrete foundation that had been built from the two backstories and trilogy itself. Sure, there are inconsistencies to Phoenix’s personality from the trilogy, but it was built off of a strong and already established foundation. That’s like comparing a house with missing roof tiles to another with missing bricks holding the house. Which do you think is going to fall?

The reason I chose Phoenix’s backstories to compare to has nothing to do with his being good or having the best backstories of AA. That goes to Miles Edgeworth and his lovely 4 backstories. The Fey’s backstories would never coordinate well with Apollo’s, because it would not point out the issues with Apollo’s backstories. For one, Maya has two backstories, not three, second her backstories rely on the backstories of others in ways Apollo’s and Phoenix’s backstories do not. Also, you are focusing on how the backstories make up the personalities of the characters, which have nothing to do with why Apollo has too many backstories or the root of the problem.

The issue with Apollo’s backstories are that they do not fit. They do not call back or show a cause and effect that would connect backstory 1 to 2 to 3. Admittedly, the third backstory at least mentions Apollo’s father and that he did go to the states at some point, but Dhurke never mentions about placing Apollo in any school and it’s never mentioned that any Gramraye was in Khura’in or had known about what happened. Phoenix’s three backstories connect and continue where the other left off. Phoenix was humiliated and saved by friend, thus pursues law to meet and save friend. Phoenix goes to law school and gets a girlfriend, who betrays and tries to poison him, thus he is tried in court and defended by Mia, resulting in Phoenix pursuing law under her and continuing his path to become a Defense Attorney to save Miles. Basic and solid foundation. Phoenix becomes a strong Defense Attorney at the end of the trilogy, resulting in taking on a client without Maya, since he had proven himself to be capable without Mia’s spirit. Taking questionable evidence from a little girl is the result of having done so in the past from Pearl. Phoenix’s successes in the trilogy results in over confidence. Phoenix’s habit of bluffing and presenting random evidence results in presenting forged evidence unknowingly.

Apollo’s backstories goes like: because Apollo’s father died in a fire, Apollo was raised in Khura’in by Durke, who then sends him on a plane to the states. This somehow results in Apollo going to a boarding school where he meets Clay Tarren and this somehow results in meeting and working with Kristoph Gavin and becoming a Defense Attorney.... also, he’s the son of Thalassa Gramraye, who happens to be the wife of Jove Justice... I guess. You see what I mean by how it feels like fitting three unmatching puzzle pieces, while ignoring the rest of the 200 pieces?

The idea of this post was to show why Apollo has the “too many backstories” problem while Phoenix does not, despite having the same amount of backstories. It doesn’t mean Apollo’s backstories aren’t better in some areas where Phoenix’s backstories could use improvement. It only means Phoenix’s backstories have a much more solid foundation. A house doesn’t have to be perfect to have a solid foundation.

The Problem with Apollo’s Backstories

It’s very rare I see this. So far, I’ve only seen two posts on Tumblr about this, but I’ve noticed a few posts that make mention about Phoenix Wright having no backstory. Now, whether they were made as a joke to not be taken seriously or not is something I cannot confirm. That being said, it did bring up something that does come up often: the problem with Apollo Justice having too many backstories. The thing is, Phoenix Wright has just as many backstories as Apollo, yet no one seems to make mention of it or perhaps are not aware. It made me question how this is possible. Certainly, if Apollo’s three backstories stick out like a sore thumb, wouldn’t Phoenix Wright’s three backstories stick out too? Shouldn’t Phoenix also have the same amount of complainers about having too many backstories?

I am a true believer that there is no such thing as a bad idea, but bad execution. I think Phoenix’s backstories are an example of Apollo’s backstories done correctly. To understand this, I’m going to go over each of Apollo’s and Phoenix’s three backstories, and explain where Phoenix got it right where Apollo did not.

With Apollo’s first backstory in the game Apollo Justice, where Apollo is introduced as the main protagonist of this game, we find out that he used to work for Kristoph Gavin at the Gavin Law Offices before finding out he murdered Shadi Smith. Later on, we find out his bracelet matches Thalassa Gramarye’s in her picture, proving that they are mother and son. Through Zak, we find out that Thalassa was once married to a different man before he passed away, believing that her first born had died with him. This draws the connection between Apollo Justice and Trucy Wright as being half brother and sister. And… that’s it. This information does not effect Apollo, since we don’t know his life outside of this during the time of the game’s release, and he does not know that Trucy is his half sister. This backstory does draw a connection between the two long lost siblings, but without any knowledge to create a reaction, it feels empty and shallow. It wasn’t until the two follow-up games that we get more of Apollo’s character and development that fans of the game began to care enough to demand the two half siblings discover their long lost relationship they are not aware of.

For Phoenix Wright, his backstory is the all-knowing class trial back in his elementary school. On one school day, Phoenix Wright was accused of stealing lunch money from a student, due to being sick and being dismissed from school that day, leaving him without an alibi. This lead to a class trial where everyone, including the teachers, shamed him, even though Phoenix claimed it wasn’t him, then crying over the humiliation and shaming. Just when Phoenix was about to forcibly apologize to this student, the student stands up and makes the claim that, since no proof was given that Phoenix had taken the money, he is innocent until proven guilty. A second student also defends him, leading to the teacher deciding to pay for the lunch money that was stolen. From that moment on, Phoenix became friends with the two students that stood up for him: Miles Edgeworth whose money was stolen and Larry Butz who was the second student to stand up for him.

The first thing that makes Phoenix’s backstory different is it creates a motivation and relatability. This backstory tells the story of what motivated Phoenix Wright to become a Defense Attorney. He had befriended the two boys that stood up for him when he was accused of theft at school. One of those friends grew up to become the Demon Prosecutor, Miles Edgeworth, who is known for falsifying and withholding evidence. When Phoenix tried to contact him, he would not answer. So, Phoenix Wright became a Defense Attorney both to meet with him and save him. With this, comes with relatability. Phoenix is someone longing for the friend he once lost, something most of us can relate to – if you’ve ever had a childhood friend, whose friendship broke apart over time. This creates motivation for Phoenix and the players to wish for Miles Edgeworth to return back to being Phoenix’s friend again. With Apollo, on the other hand, his first backstory doesn’t give us anything to relate or motivate us to want him and Trucy to discover their real mother or relation. The mention about Apollo’s biological father does come up, but not until Dual Destinies and Spirit of Justice, which I will get into later. Because of how shallow and empty this backstory feels, it’s no longer Apollo was called a Gary-Sue when the Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney first came out.

The second backstory for Apollo finally gives us something concrete. In this second backstory, Apollo had grown up with Clay Terran in a boarding school. We get a flashback of Clay crying because someone in his family died (I can’t remember who. Comment if you know). Apollo cheers him up with his “I’M FINE!” speech. This became a motto for him and Clay. From this backstory, we finally find out that Apollo had grown in a boarding school during his youth with Clay. We finally get a motivation and relatability from Apollo Justice to make us care and cheer for him. There’s just one problem… what does this have anything to do with Apollo’s connection to the Gramarye and his relation to Trucy? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. That’s where Phoenix’s second backstory differs.

For Phoenix Wright, his second backstory tells that he began studying at Ivy University to study on law and art. From there, he met a beautiful lady named Dahlia Hawthorn at the library inside the courthouse. She gave him a heart-shaped bottle as a token of their love and they hit it off. Having dated Dahlia for nine months, he began showing off his little gift to all his friends at the university, even when Dahlia asked him to give it back. Just then, Phoenix came across Dahlia’s ex boyfriend named Doug Swallow, who met with him to warn him that Dahlia was not who he thinks she is. Angry, Phoenix pushes him, then finds him dead not long afterwards. He is arrested for murder, defended by Mia Fey – who is an already established character, in the tutorial first case of the third game of Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney. Through Mia’s defense, Phoenix realized that not only did Dahlia’s gift turn out to be evidence used to poison Mia’s boyfriend, but Dahlia had also tried to poison him with his cold medication and was the one responsible for Doug’s murder.

Just like with Apollo’s second backstory and Phoenix’s first, this creates relatability and motivation. It creates a motivation for why Phoenix was angry at Miles Edgeworth during the second game, why he trusts Mia so strongly and why he would go to Hazakura Temple, once he sees someone that looks like Dahlia. This also reveals one of Phoenix’s major flaws as someone that considers betrayal and murder by poison inexcusable actions, much like how Apollo’s second backstory reveals how and why Clay’s death pushes him to distrust his colleagues. Unfortunately, what Apollo’s second backstory does not show is any connection to the first. With Phoenix’s second backstory, it connects back to the first and second game. It explains how Phoenix met an already established character, explains why Phoenix was cross with Edgeworth in the second game and follows where the first backstory left off with wanting to become a Defense Attorney to meet with Miles Edgeworth. Aside from Apollo growing up in a Boarding School, confirming that he is an orphan, and why he always shouts “I’M FINE!” we get no connection or follow-up from the first backstory. There’s no connection to his former boss, Trucy or the Gramarye’s. Thus, Apollo’s second backstory feels like a separate story from the first, whereas Phoenix’s second backstory feels like a follow-up to the first.

Apollo’s third backstory is that Apollo’s father, Jove Justice, came to the Kingdom of Khura’in to play music inside Durke’s home. One day, a fire arose and Jove Justice was assumingly murdered. Dhurke had miraculously saved Jove’s infant son in the nick of time before the rest of his residence was burned, hiding in the mountains with his eldest son, Nahyuta. From there, Dhurke had raised Nahyuta and Apollo in the mountain as their father, watching them grow up. Unfortunately, because of the laws in the kingdom where Defense Attorneys were prisoned with any client declared Guilty and Dhurke being an outlaw, he sent Apollo to the United States. From there, Apollo never saw or heard from Dhurke or Nahyuta again, believing all his life that Dhurke had abandoned him.

Again, like the second backstory, this gives us relatability and motivation. Leaving any family is something all of us feel saddened about. It also follows up with the relatability of Phoenix’s first backstory of being close with someone, only to grow apart from them with age. But, again, there is no connection between this backstory or the other two. What does this backstory have anything to do with Apollo’s connection with the Gramarye, relation to Trucy, friendship with Clay, growing up in a boarding school as a youth or his reasons for saying “I’M FINE!” all the time? NOTHING! There’s not a single callback to any of these, not even to reoccurring characters from the fourth or fifth game. Nothing on Kristoph Gavin, the Space Center, nothing. There is mention of Jove Justice being Apollo’s biological father, but do we get anything on Thalassa or the Gramarye’s? Even a tiny bit? Nope! Any connection with Jove Justice and the Gramarye’s to explain how he may’ve met the daughter of the famous Magnify Gramarye and they may’ve fallen in love? Nope! Again, I get nothing. It’s sad, because the story could’ve also added Thalassa into the mix as being Jove’s singing partner, a subtle picture of her and explaining why she might be so talented in singing. The fact that the second case does involve the Gramarye, I think, is a missed opportunity to draw a connection to Apollo’s third and first backstory.

For Phoenix Wright, his third backstory is in Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney, believe it or not. This backstory takes place during the seven years between the third and fourth game. Phoenix Wright was defending Zak Gramarye for the murder of Magnify Gramarye. During this trial, he presents forged evidence unknowingly, which Klavier Gavin reveals to be forged via the surprising Witness. From there, Phoenix is disbarred from law and his client Zak disappears from site. Trucy, who is Zak’s daughter, is left behind and Phoenix cannot find any living relatives, thus decides to adopt her as his own daughter. From here, he turns his law offices into a Talent Agency for his new daughter and takes the job as a piano/poker player. He befriends the only Bar Associate that voted him to be innocent, Kristoph Gavin, who had used his friendship to stalk and watch him.

Again, this creates relatability and motivation as someone losing their job for unfair reasons, entering fatherhood and being manipulated by fake friends. This also is a great follow-up to the trilogy itself and confirming everything that’s already established canon such as Phoenix considering poison and betrayal to be inexcusable, which is what Kristoph does. It establishes the relationship and connection with Trucy and even Apollo. Even as weak as Apollo’s backstory is, it is enough to give Phoenix a strong motivation to take him in as a student. With how strong this third backstory to Phoenix is and its connection to the trilogy as a whole, it makes me wonder why he wasn’t the protagonist of this story. Though, it does conclude what this third backstory does so well that all of Apollo’s backstories do not do: continue where the previous left off.

With every backstory Phoenix gets, it always continues where the previous left off. They connect well like a puzzle. Each piece matches well and never feels separate. With each new backstory, it continues where the previous left off. The second backstory continues where the first and second game left off and the third backstory continues where the trilogy left off. With Apollo’s three backstory, they feel so disconnected, it’s like trying to fit three unmatching pieces together, while ignoring the rest of the 197 puzzle pieces. Sure, the third backstory might’ve mentioned Jove Justice as Apollo’s biological father, but we don’t know anything about Jove or Thalassa, their relationship, how they met or anything. Was Thalassa the lead singer when Jove played, like she is as Lamoure? I don’t know. Even Apollo growing up at a Boarding School or how he went there is never explained in the third backstory. Did Dhurke send Apollo there and pay for his classes? I don’t know.

In conclusion, Apollo’s problem with his backstories are not that there are too many, but that they do not connect. Backstories must fit together in order to work. There has to be a cause and effect. Phoenix Wright has full backstories that have always connected perfectly like puzzle pieces. He has one of the strongest established backstories in Ace Attorney, alongside Miles Edgeworth, who technically has four backstories. That just goes to show you can’t have too many backstories. Although, you can have botched up backstories that do not match up that makes it feel like there are too many backstories.

What are your thoughts on this? Feel free to comment, whether you agree or disagree. I might make a follow-up to this to explain how Apollo’s three backstories could be fixed to where they feel complete. It really depends.

[snezfics-n-shit]

idk if you're into like fever and stuff but how about some feverish edgeworth/wrightworth :0)

Yessiree! :D

With little a snz as a treat

     As much as it broke Phoenix's heart to see his husband ill, this was the one occasion he could see that signature smile Miles gave him whenever he brought something he needed. There was a warmth in it, how it mixed so well with the way Miles’s hands wrapped around his mug of tea, how he looked so tired and unwell before but fought through that to show Phoenix his appreciation. After years of living together, Miles even found himself seeing a romantic aspect in having a cold, even when Phoenix was too worried to effectively dote on him.

“Are you absolutely sure you wouldn’t rather be in court right now?” Miles asked hoarsely before taking another sip from his mug.

“And miss taking care of you?” Phoenix kissed his husband’s warm forehead, hiding his dislike of the heat with a soft smile. “Of course I’m sure. Athena can handle the case, and I have plenty of sick leave to spare.”

“You should save some for yourself, you know.” Miles sniffed. “What with you needing to kiss me every time you come in the room.”

“I’ll be fine. I hardly ever get sick.” Phoenix planted a small kiss on Miles’s lips, as if he were inviting his husband to watch him not catch his cold, in whatever way that would work. 

“But when you do, you’re in bed for days.” Miles acknowledged once his lips were free. “It’s hardly a fair exchange, your affections for my cold.”

“If I do get sick, which I doubt I will, you give me all the kisses you want. You’d be immune, right? So you can kiss me all you like, no problem.” Phoenix thought he had a pretty solid argument to stand with.

“Knowing you, you’d be so out of it, you wouldn’t remember half of those kisses.” Miles took one last sip of his tea before setting the mug gently on the end table next to his glasses sitting just as neatly folded as his handkerchief accompanying them. “I’m still not seeing a deal here.”

“You worry too much for someone sick in bed.” Phoenix tsked and sighed through his nose.  He checked the alarm clock beside him. “Looks like it’s been at least four hours. Do you think you’ll need to take any more medicine, or are you good for the day.”

“Considering it’s only been good for clearing up the noisier symptoms and hardly anything else, I think I’ll live if I wait until you turn in for tonight.”

“So it did nothing for your throat or your head, huh? And definitely nothing for your fever...” Phoenix frowned. “You’re sure you’re okay adding that  bad cough to it? Among, well, the other thing.” Still as easily flustered as ever.

Miles found a small comfort in the pink of Phoenix’s cheeks almost matching his own.

“Maybe that ‘other thing,’ is just what will get me through the evening, love.” Miles suggested with a teasing grin. Even though his own tastes differed from his husband’s, the words left a sensation on his tongue that had him feeling as if he had just said something filthy. It would have lingered longer if he had more warning time to savor Phoenix’s anticipation as that ever recognizable tickle crept in on him. “Hu’ussSSHCHH! HrrRSSHHOO!” So his nose went right in for the kill, not wasting any time on quieter, warning-type sneezes. However, considering a genuine fit for him during a cold was, funny enough to him, uncommon, there was really no need for such a warning.

“Ah! Bless you.” Phoenix tensed up, completely abandoning his brief thought to potentially stand up off the edge of the bed and retrieve a fresh cooling patch from the fridge. He relaxed himself enough to hand over his husband’s handkerchief with at least some composure. “You know, when I saw you in court for the first time, I thought you’d be using only handkerchiefs, or at least not only having them as a last resort when you’ve gone through nearly every tissue box in the house.”

“That was what you were thinking when we met again?” Miles raised a brow as he carefully tended to his nose. “I’m not at all surprised.”

“No, not like that.” Phoenix waved his hand nervously. “I meant, that’s what I would have thought about you. Er, I mean, I did think it, but in a conversation with Larry after a few too many drinks, not actually in the courtroom.”

“You somehow managed to make that worse,” the emphasis placed on the word triggered a fit of coughs before Miles could continue, “sweetheart.” 

“J-Just get some sleep. I’ll grab something for your fever.” Phoenix stood up, paused, and looked back to his husband in bed. He smiled as Miles closed his eyes, taking that to mean he complied, and left another kiss on his forehead, ‘for the road,’ so to speak. 

If Phoenix was lucky, Miles would recover quickly and he would remain unscathed by the cold. If he was luckier, Miles wouldn’t initiate a conversation regarding what Phoenix and Larry discussed over a decade ago.

By the time Miles was back on his feet some days later, with only the occasional sniffle, Phoenix found no such luck in either department.