#and life is strange is why i have the people in my life now thst i love and who love me

[dracyab]

When I first heard about the new game in September last year, I was excited, and the photos I saw of the new setting looked really cool! but then as soon as the game was announced and I heard it was a new game with Max, I was excited, until I watched the trailer and saw how everything was changing. This wasn't them creating a game with Max Caulfield because they wanted to continue her story, this was DeckNine creating a game with a popular main character because they knew they could make money and bring back old fans, even if we knew they were going to taint her legacy. Because what does digging up a grave matter if there's gold housed inside?

It was always a cash grab and never about the story. Like said in the posts above, it was always about using Pricefield as a tool and then to break them up as a plot device to drive their versions of the characters into the situations they wanted them in, so that they could create this story about yearning for a new partner when the love of your life has broken up with you for whatever reason they give (idk I haven't played the game).

DeckNine doesn't care about its characters, they care about money, and they care about making stories that passably fit into the life is strange universe. But Life is Strange is a series that is about its characters and how they feel othered from the world around them. Life is Strange, as said above, is completely and totally about the queer experience of not feeling like you belong in the world around you. They're games about then coming to terms with the people who do care about you and whom you care about, and finding a way to make the future work with them even if you have to let everything crash down around you.

Because you matter, and the people you love matter even when the world tells you that you don't.

"but it's realistic that they would breakup"

Not the point.

"But they had a lot of trauma the re-"

Also not the point.

"But at least she's a-"

Absolutely not the point.

Y'all trying to justify a narrative choice from within the narrative constraints.

That's a mistake.

Just like how many people never understood why so many would pick Bae ending, so many people just don't seem to get what the pairing meant overall.

Y'all realise what this pairing meant to people when it came out?

Despite the issues with the ending, the adoration and love the pairing has to this day has been earned by the game - it's inseparable from the franchise and it's reception.

It wasn't just another pairing. It wasn't just something that existed as bait or something within fanon or something developers never committed to.

Through the years plenty of ships get baited disingenuously while throwing the audience nothing but breadcrumbs - for example the disaster of Sherlock fandom, the mess with Supernatural, Teen Wolf, Voltron and so on. Or the way Blake/Yang in RWBY were the most blatant baiting that got no on-screen development(despite all the setup that show ignored for years) till the moment the show literally was getting axed and they wanted to milk LGBTQ+ community for money one last chance.

And some shows would stumble into something important but fail to realise it and thus end up squashing it - ask Buffy fans about Tara and Willow or The 100 fans about clexa.

There were LGBTQ+ pairings in video games too but rarely they would be so front and center and very often would be playersexual.

This wasn't what Life is Strange ended up being.

Life Is Strange, at the very core is about queer experience - about fitting in, about making connections in the world that rejects you, about finding beauty in the life that hates and hurts you - Max and Chloe's relationship is the key to the entire game.

For some that meant letting go but for others? It gave the chance to fight a trope no matter what and to get an ending, albeit flawed, where a WLW pairing they liked can be happy and face the future together.

People lived through those two characters and their experiences finding something genuine to relate to.

Max and Chloe were that generation's Korra/Asami, Willow/Tara, etc.

Even DONTNOD recognised that in the end and treated it with respect.

Double Exposure might not pull a BYG outright but it sure does everything to kill the happy memories a fandom made about the pairing - to go back through every single ray of sunshine one ending got and subvert it, taint it, reject it.

Picking the Bae choice when playing Double Exposure is the Narrative constantly telling you how wrong you were to expect happiness when you picked the ending where the pairing is intact and how acshually it isn't intact!

It doesn't kill the characters but it sure goes an extra mile to kill what those characters MEAN to the audience.

Realism, plausibility and so on come after - it's what a writer does when they decide on a path. A writer doesn't just do something because it makes sense and is out of their control - they decide to do it and then make it make sense. Whether they succeed or not depends on how good a writer is.

Double Exposure isn't the story about a breakup. It isn't the story about two women dealing with their trauma.

Double Exposure treats an iconic pairing people cared about as a backstory element - nothing more.

Deck Nine expects the audience to accept what happened and move on to shiny new cast and possible new LIs.

The writers of Double Exposure are telling you - "look, this doesn't matter. Now here's a new mystery you can solve and new cast and look Max is back and you liked using her powers right? Use powers to do stuff."

To this developer team the core element of what made the franchise so important to its audience is nothing more than a leftover plot thread to "write around".

Because to these writers queer experience apparently starts and stops with searching for a relationship - someone being in a relationship that's not part of the story or someone being comfortable NOT being in a relationship at all just don't exist.

What Deck Nine writers seem to be doing is treating it as disposable or interchangeable/replaceable, while also inadvertently tainting whatever comes after with fandom rage.

The worst thing that can happen to a new character is being "the next love interest" - because people channel their frustrations towards the character (or in some worst cases, please don't do this, the actor).

Where there was an iconic part of the franchise Double Exposure, intentionally or not, sets up a toxic battle ground.

That's the point - treating LGBTQ+ audience as sales numbers, manipulating us, treating something that has been a formative experience to so many lives as disposable, or worse yet - malleable.

(And yes there's also a wider issue with Deck Nine and the working conditions there, misogyny, the nazi imagery and the rest but I don't think this is that disconnected from that? How they treat their audience and subject matter is a reflection of culture inside.)

[royalwriteroftheuniverse]

Returning the Stones

1-the goodbye

Just incase 18+ theres fludd angst mentions of kissing implied intimate tons of sweet kissing and tears. Comments likes ans reblogging apprexitaed. No permission to repost anywhere else or to translate or to use in any ai story generator to finish it

I stood there as steve got his last good wishes from his team mates. I stood back watching tears in my eyes. I knew he only had a certain amount and im thinking back to the cinversariin we had after it was decided hed be the onky to return them

"Why do I feel like theres a but comming"

"There is" he took my hands, "sweeetheart even tho hank pym is back theres still that adjustment period everyone is going through and he csnt make more pym particles right now"

"Cant you wait? Time will always be there for you to return it?"

He took my palm, like he does when he's  nervous and subconsciouslybdraws the same patterns he always does when he looked down.

"Yes and no. You see the way that Strange explained it is that time will continue on  and yes and while we can wait the stones not being there is affecting us here and now as in the past they arent there.  I could wait but if simething happens," he swollows hard, "something to you. I cant lose you."

"Steve nothing is going to ha-"

"You dont know that!" Hw yells and i jumo back almsot in tears.

"Im sorry, I'm sorry I didnt mean to "

"Strange said something didnt he?"

Steve looked uo with tears in his eyes and nodded. 

"It doesn't mean it will but i can't bear the thought"

"And I can't live without"

"Neither can I, if Tony was here..."

"I know" I sob a bit  as he pulls me intk his chest and cries too "if tony easnt gone id kill him all iver again."

This garners a chuckle from Steve.

"She's your last stop isnt she?"

I looked up i could only see the side if his cheek really but it was like i could see him go pale.

Not for the reasons yoy think. When insaw in the care facility, i mean yiu saw her every time she didnt remeber me and she eas so ha-

"I know happy and thrilled and saying shes worry you didnt get to live a full happy life."

It hurt me too it was so sad seeing her, I mean seing anyone like that would be saddening. 

"I just want to tell her im ok and that I survived so she doesnt have those regrets and that...."

I pulled back a little and I whipesmone side of tears from my face and he whipped the other putting his hand on my chin and guiding it making sure I can't move away as he knows how scared and fearful i must me and he looked in my eyes .

"That l, I found the love of my life and I am so happy."

I let out a small chuckle with some tears.

"You know that right? That i love you. I love ypu more than anything. And ill always come back to you. Like a bad oenny you cant losemor that cat that never stopped following yoy home,"

On cue Midnight jumoed into our laps with a meow and using her head to burrow under steves tee for warmth like she always did garnering a laugh from both of us. I pulled away a but as steve took iut of hisnshirt and talked to her 

"Youll take care off mommy right?" 

"Take care of me why woukd she need to-" I statted bawling

"Oh honey no no no i didnt mean it oh no " he put Mid night down and grabbed me chuck and tight, so tiggt i almost coukdnt breathe. "Wrong words blvery wrong words. I meant if something haooened. Lets face it i don't have greay track records when it comes to saving the world. The first time i dissapeared for decades and I don't want that to happen my last time but im afraid of tha-"

"Last time?"

"Yea," he rubbed my arms comfortly "my last time, the world doesn need me not as much as you do. And i want to give thst life yoy want because i want it too. I see the longing in your eyes when yoy see a young couoke and a baby and i have the same in mine that wishing hoping dreaming. During these five years people havent needed me and ive been wnlanting to give it uo for a while now justtrying to figure out the best way to do it and yiu know ive been slowly limiting my cap duties."

I know,

I know yiu do. So after this i want to give you that. That family a real family a couoke of mini us's." He interlocked our fingers wispering "I hope to God they look like you".

I chuckled. "Once I return the stones uts you and me babe every day forever no interruptions. Ill be in that bed every day yoy wake uo and every night you go to sleep. Ill hold yiu hair back wvery morning sickness and yoy can try and break a finger or two or try to lift molojiner when youre giving birth."

That made me laugh

"Ill hadle the night and change every littke poopy diaper and we'll hold them together wheh they get thier shots and bad dreams. Ill help you kiss thier boo boos and scare away boyfriends"

Got thiee whole lives planned out hu?

Yiu betcha dolls and when they get marriednand have little ones of thier own ill hug them and then beat uo their husbands for doing thst my little girls "

I cracked up.

"Hey I will unless its done by oamossis no one is touching my daughters."

"You are too much"

He kisses my fore head and puts hair behind my ears,

"Yea well. Only the best for my family and if best means that i have to beat up thier husbands to out then in thier place so be it"

He rubbed my wedding band and engagement ring as we calmed down for a moment of silence. 

You know I would never give you either of these if my heart bekonged to someone else, in another time or place. This wasnt because i was never, " he losed his eyes and sighhned then ooened them stuck here. I was here to find you. I felt more for you then I did her even at first look - i almost proposed."

I know  i rememeber yoy did not try and cover well for that *i laughed*

"I tried"

"Yea so badly' I laughed and  ran my fingers through his hair.

"I grew it out for you, ya know"

"I know. I cant wait to see how blonde it was from when it was in the early days of the avengers"

He chuckled. 

"I love you," he wispered and kissed the bridge of my noise 

"I love you," he wispered  and and kissed my upper cheek.

"I love you," he wispered and kissed my lower cheek

"I love you," he wispered ad kissed the other cheek 

"I love you," he wispered and kissed my other cheek bone.

"I love you," he wispered and kissed my fore head.

"I love you," he wispered and kissed fhe right side of my upper neck.

"I love you," he wispered and kissed my lips.

"I love you," he wispered and kissed the left side of my upper neck.

"I love you," he wispered and kissed the middle of my neck.

"I love you," he wispered and kissed my lips so very deep that i almost lost my brrath. And that was how that night went. Him showing his love he knew he didnt have to prove it but he did he heled me and kissed me anddid everything he wanted to so to make sure he felt like he knew i knew he loved me and more. That was how last night went too. The last night before this trip. A trio that i knew would be mear seconds for me for for him it could be years. 

Then he walked over to me, he had tears in his eyes. Hia other team mates offered to come to help only ateve, i bruce and hank pim knew that wasnt possible. 6 vials. He had 6 and that was all. I was praying of somethin did go grong that last jump hed be able to grab more particles and get back to me. I also knew about the contingency they set up the older face the extra shield, just in case. So many just in cases. It meant to be steves way of dissapearing so we could live aort of loke clint and tony away from the spotlight and danger. 

He hugged me again, wispering in my eqr Ill be back in seconds my love and i love you so much," i felt a tear fall from his face onto mine

"Itll be only minutes babe, 60 minutes the most and youll be back in my arms." I gave him reassurance

"I  hope it works out like that nur every monute ill be thinking about getting back to you,"

He hugged me tightly. "I love you. And those seconds that pass here i told bucky to not let go of your hand,"

I chuckled.

"I know you. You need a hand and he wont let go. But if you two kiss i will kill him"

I laughed what?

"I just wanted to see that smile before i go"

Get your ass back here and ill give yku something to smile about tonight.

Oh is that a threat 

"Oh no that promise," I smiled wrapping my arms around his neck and we looked into eachothers eyes and then he kissed me. 

"This ring isnt leaving this chain and this chain isnt leaving my body"

"I know" 

He took my hand as he walked up to the platform and I followed. He took his stance snd gave me one of the deepest longest kisses hes ever given me. 

"I love you dont forget im waiting right here no matter what you do to retrurn those im here loving you forever. "

"I know I promise ill come back no matrer what i love you too much." 

Steve gave me one last kiss on my lips and then a kiss behind me ear making me giggle 

"I needed to see and hear that one last time."

I felt bucky take my hand and lead me down the strairs steves and my eyes never leaving eachother's. He looked at me as he put the helmet on  and I squeezed Bucky's hand as Steve lifted his hand to presse rhe vutton and bucky squeezed mine as Steve dissapeared.

After 45 seconds my hand let go of Bucky's  but Bucky bevee ler go of mine.

(Varient timeline endings comming)

Taglist

@nana1000night @whore-for-chris-evans @sparklybarbarianninja @patzammit @hawkeyes-queen @bookishtheaterlover7 (i know im miasing a few sry ill ads when i can find the name if u want to be added let me kno)

[dargiemarif]

I do fear the thought of death.

And I wonder, how someone like me with my family live long?

My mother has an auto immune disease along with others, my dads side isn't the healthiest either, so how is someone like me supposed to live long?

I want to create for penkio; i feel like that's my only purpose. I'd also like to make people's lives a little bit better aswell. I want to live long , but looking forward how am i supposed to believe in that? I'm scared of talking about death because I believe if I talk about it it'll happen and I guess I need to get over thst fear, my therapist says. I wanna live long and create, but how am I supposed to? I choose faith to help me cope with this, believing I'll be better in Heaven where i can create blissfully there. I wouldn't say I'm Christian or very religious. Jesus follower is the term I use, and fuck I hate fearing my peers will hate me because of what I believe in but whatever. I'm someone like them who believes in something. So what? I'm still human. I want good life for everyone, I support things that deserve supporting, I just try to make things better, as much as I can. Is it selfish to talk about myself like that? It's true though, how I think. If anything I want to make things a little bit better for people. I respect everyone who deserves respect, and I love everyone. And then still I'm afraid of death, in a strange way. I want to have an impact whether it be small or big.

I guess that's why I'm scared of it.

I feel depressed, though. I don't wanna do anything. Everything bores me most of the time, even my interests. My anxiety is better atleast. I find things hard to do. Getting up or doing simple things is hard. I'm jealous of others. I feel hopeless. That I won't get to do anything i want to do.

I don't even like labeling myself with things like that though, more of to describe what I feel. I mean it's not labeling myself, just what I feel, so I guess it's fine. I lie on every mental health test the doctor gives me except for the anxiety part. I wanted medication for it cause nothing worked. Now with medication things work. I feel more hopeful that I can get things to work for my other problems, but would they even get taken seriously without a diagnosis? The only reason I'd like to get diagnosed with things is so my problems are taken seriously. My therapist doesn't help shit with my trauma. I'm getting through it on my own. I wanna help people with that too. Sometimes you just need a good medication to help that process though. There's downsides to diagnoses too. Medical care I'm pretty sure would just blame medical issues more on mental issues(from what I've heard).

And i don't want to make my mom upset. She'd only blame herself. Somehow she got custody over me. I didn't grow up in a very mentally stable environment the first few years of my life- I am a child of a mother who had untreated bpd, autism and more. doesn't make a good combo for a parent. She still has those things,, obviously, but I can REALLY say she's doing better. I'm m proud of how far she's come, along with my brother. And other people. Ive seen people imrpove, so, so can we. I don't want to get diagnosed for mental stuff. I just want help dealing with my problems. How'd that come from my fear of death? Even the word fills me with anxiousness. Some days I'm not so scared, due to any reasons I have. Death is natural, death is life. Everyone should know that, but it is hard. Live life, solve your fears, do good, make stuff. Create, make an impact(small or big). Let others in. Love♡ rant over, I'm scared

[solardick]

Almost fell over today from a dizzy spell. I almost lost conscoousness. Ass rot, continues.

Why go to the hospital? Their just going to tell me to go fuckmyself lije everytime ive ever been. Why go to a ckinic? I wont see a foctor that soeaks my language. Why go to the dentist, gheir just going to sabotage my teeth or take advantage for money.

No one move too fast now. A testosterone ridden “You talking to me?!” Just keep walking. Talking to all of you. Conceded ass. Not caring that you’re all holding up traffic and people have to squeeze by while you just stand there. Trying to pick a fight to feed your “ego” while with your little children.

☦️

Rich with symbolism. The more i learn the more enamoured I become to russian culture. The slanted dash represents to two theives on either side of the christ man. The side slanting up is for the man who repented and the one slanting down is for the one who cursed him. And so went to hell while the other ascended to heaven.

Though with my own, here not ever taking any position. As i walk through the valley i see naught but sickness. Being an enemy doesn’t leave room. But as i walk through the fields i see naught but, presence. Beyond the man that speaks as crows. All the while being called black.

Psychological violence. By the sick side. Well known enough. The manure i sprout from.

Though do not be mistaken as by eating the crow. For they know not what they speak. Its just a clever spell to conceal the truth. As one who speaks as crows. And not one that is spoken to by them. There so much of this that it is difficult to know what is real from what is prapogandabh. As it is often soeke. To be coming from without by the very ones condemning the other. As russian’s spies is a common place heard voiced, concern of prejudice.

Never mind the world stage. Its all fallows a script. I am an enemy in strange lands. Being risen by voices that are condemned by others.

There are some interesting facts about italy and russia on the same time frame as the emergence of the tarot is questioned to be. The 14th century had a heavy traffic between the two countries which maybe may be assumed why they are all spies, while secretly shuffling a deck of cards culturally ingrained in mainf stream coach potatoism.

And it’ll probably turn out thst tarot is a Pictionary for the itslian 21 letter alphabet comprised of Russian imagery. From rhe interbredding of italian and russian royalty. A tool to aid in language learning and cultural understanding.the same method is used today for toddlers and interactive battery powered Pictionary games.

Raven came by to see me today. To say hello. I said hello back. Eye contact and everything. Though that was nice of it. If i had any grub i’d have offered it. Fun too cause i received an Odin article in my mailbox instead of at my front door.

Though, Unfortunately I’m not allowed being friendly with a girl, or trying to correct any immoral disposition towards me, without being punished. Well in most cases. Though its not like ive ever really had a converstaion with one before that wasnt old enough to be my mother. Or wasnt messing with me. Somits a touchy subject. Uhm. Eh raven. And the ones that do give off matting calls and sayign i have a boifriend. Instead i continiously get paired withother i cant communicate with or Druggies, drunks, criminals, or homo’s which 90% of them are spychologically or emotionally abusive. So i have nothing to say in person. All my communication jow is from god and its non vocal. Are they talkign to me? Ok, just nod. And agree witheverything. Let them speak for me. People have been doing that my whole life. Forcing their agendas on me. Uhm. Well, we’ll see what’s next. And lay off the negative. Even if that an impossibility. And if their messing with you don’t give back the same. Cause it’ll worst later.

Usualy the summer heat is bothersome. Not this year. Not so much. Maybe it’s because there wasn’t a winter this year. So there’s no adaptation to the consistent cold and the heat is tolerable.

Hot cold hot cold hot cold, tempering a sword. Diesnt seem like i gave room for the hermit card in my deck. Though, will have to play with positions and read through the dictionary. One finds alot of english words in russian. See if i cant find any more convenient letter card associations. Cause the tower card is obviously russian. Interreting considering it was the italians that built was is now considered the modern day Kremlin.

Though, a complete transformation in personality is required in accepting an old way of being. Which would be easy, if outside interference wasn’t forcing it’s mandate. And if old knowledge lead to the emergence of a new personality to begin with.

Image for letter З is all but made. Only that it seems to fall out of a “trump” category. And more into the triumph category. Also ideas as to the letter Э, perhaps being the world card. So far the dominating motivation is the alphabetical correspondence of primary letters. In primary, i assume the most significance to single letter words as primary significance, fallowed by prefixes secondarily and tertiary, as a sum definition of all words beginning with a letter. Since all words in a category under the dame letter have reversed meanings, reversed card definitions also fallow the same rule. The reverse or conflicting or contrasted meaning also has to be considered for the image formation.

This of course has its fallibility since not everything may be defined this way in a single image. The philosophical debate about the fallibility of human decision may be argued here.

Since the word is god. And god is the word. And god speaks through the bird. And the bird is the only other living thing on earth that can speak actual words. They make for messengers more often than not. As does all other creatures that have a heavier emotional tie to. Though, messengers comes in all form. Not all are loving beings but carried on with the supernal motions of reality. It is all too easy to include these into pictorial form. Save that it ceases to be universal and becomes geographical. Save for those that span borders.

An example of the english letter Tt and the tower. Combines the elements or notions of movement and the static immovable. As transport and transit. This implies the function of inanimate objects or animating tools, stemming to vehicles to the mode of violence and destruction. A 911 call to the motions of avionics and towering structures. The motion to transpose and it’s deffintion as a prefix. This given solely to the power of mars is erroneous. As are its definition given to it in tarot. And only works this way in accordance to the rest of the deck. Or the rest of the script. In is also highly attached to the planet mercury. The 911 towers by itself also gives prominence to mars by the power of 9 and the moon by the pictorial power of the moon card. Number 2. And two towers. Which lead to the violence of animation firearms functions agaisnt nations known for the use of A-K- 47’s. A fool card to justice as is shown to the letter A and the letter K. Though the A also being tied to the alpha-tism for domination. As well as to the apprehension of first experiences. 47 is an interrseting number also. It breaks down to number 11. And also to cyclic repetition by 2 to the number 5. And again. Brings it to the hierophant, -under one rule- and to the number 7. The chariot. 7 also brings it back to the hierophant. And the institution.

Its position in the deck shows promise to a life foundation prior to outside interference of violence. And the fear of outside threats to self. The fallowing card is the star. A feminine body in a state of reception, and peace. Restitution. This to be fallowed by emergence and a rainbow sun. The problem here that the tower card being a mercury symbol. Tied to a negative mars is, a violent outburst of communication. On my personal case this same effect. Did not result in any positive restitution of peace or an outcry of a nation to slay the evil. Instead the opposite and the reemergence of evil , fire by fire all the while preaching about number 22 and extiguishing the flames while throwing gasoline on it. So fuck you all, perverting a natural phenomenonal symbol for peace after a storm and praise russia.

A state bred and risen from several decimations, and survival by seclusion from interfering bodies of information while being demonized and staying true to them selves and their origin. Building their own individuality away from the evils of degeneration of being. Neighbouring nations that stood by and watched severe calamity befall them. Before raising even a single finger.

Cant say i like the cultural fashion style much though.

With the added fact that most of the west usies the Waite version of tarot….. yeh. Stay away from that one. Its pure evil. The marseille and Italiano versions are go toos. European versions in general. And considering my first life experience is a crisis. Falling down a full staircase as a toddler barely able to walk, probably yet stand. Suits the tower card as letter Бб. Also suits the russian reformation of the beginning 20th century. And the fallowing 26 million russian civilian casualties by facist germany then entering the America’s under the depth psychology movement. The germanic languages in general are the most susceptible. For a people that knowledgeable as to the creation of the psychology movement and that indent to social engineering, - and superior craftsmanship- not aware the battle was a lost cause to begin with is worthy of scrutiny and speculation. The argument against the “pioneers” not being of german nationality aside that fact from being German speaking by native mother tongue. And then having a then, recent popular music group called ramstein with a song on the top charts that repeats the words “you are mine” or, “I have you.” While spitting flames….

Alchemy, the art of deconstruction and reconstruction based on the law of equivalent exchange. The law of equivalent exchange is synonymous as putting in the time and effort to the creation of thought forms and knowledge.

Though when it comes to art supplies. German engineering is the way to go. Love those Faber Castel polychromous crayons. Even if they are pricy. But, wont be able to get back into that until after all the manipualtion goes away and rots in a ditch to be eating by fucken dung beetles. Would ahve wuit smoking years ago save for the consistent stress and sabotages by these neo nazist cockroaches.

“Classical” esoterists formation of the tarot to Egyptian origins.

The art of prostituting humanity as slavery. While the russian substitute the word as an apology. While the bible equates it to a sin of prostituting oneself to false idols or false gods, in the sense of the sacrifice of pride. While the “westerner’d” equates it to sex and pride, while associating it to a negative view of feminine sexual services. But a positive view of masculine sexual conditioning. Australians have a healthier more natural view and at the same time allow for personal opinion and disposition to make a choice for themselves. Northern liberal or southern conservative. Same works for the united states. Canadians are devoid of choice to favour dominion on lunar values. There is no pride in an apology.

No? Its been 30 years since canadians won their own trophy cup. Is the team called the oilers, after crude oil emissions destroying the atmoshpere, really going to win the cup this year? So much for national pride. Rhey should stick to what they know best and bending over. Even the native Americans said, stop using our language as symbols of pride, you suck.

Satirical truth aside, it’s all apart of the script, anyway. Present goals are in reducing carbon emissions, not in attaching pride to them. Even if they did win. Symbolically speaking is an insult to current objections and motivations. Though attaching to male endeavours. Is part of the problem. That needs to be fixed. On this regard, the present russian influence serves purpose. It has less to do with annexing land and more to do with conditioning it’s populace and interfering with the manipulations against mankind and giving notice and support for its current anti-semitism against evil and outside interference against its motivations. The united states cutting trade with china forces the chinese to invest in other clients endorsing ties and diplomatic and foreign relations to ensure their own economic survival. And then gets backlash from western nations condemning to increasing support for the russian government.

On this regard, the American justice carries a sword and doesn’t care on whom it is pointed. The russian justice holds a shield. The Americans are forcing hands and picking fights outside their own jurisdiction increasing support for it’s enemies while gaining independance from communist conservatist governments. Canada aims at increasing its own population by giving refuge for as many foreigners as it can possibly support with minimal strain on its economy. Supporting the war against Ukraine. The chinese have a larger army than there are people in the americas. This current state of events will last for another 12 years. Afterwards russia will be absolved of all it’s “crimes”. And peace will be ling lasting. Though a major war is not out of the question. Theres no point to fret for its all planned out anyway with a very clear and specific goal in mind. Unless it forces its attention specifically and martial law gets enacted though i doubt the majority of canadians would even care or listen anyway. Being all foreigners running away from the fight to indulgence in providence and welfare, and debauchery, sexual liberty, strong alchohol and a sedatives. Sold on every street corner. Sorry personal bias. Of all the foreigners im being introduced to it’s only the Nigerians who aren’t seemingly taking advantage of the welfare system or promoting and/or smoking drugs on my pathways. While most of the locals still give me the ridicule of being full of shit. Cause they masterbate to pornhub. And speak of degenerate, prejudice or bipolar bs everyday. And then every once in a while because i have a neurotic break and then get punished for it. … same story for the last pushing 40 years. Same shit different year.

At least vishnu can jerk off four guys at the same time. See what i mean?

🎶 Girl, you’re my angel 🎶

If looking for russian history books. Or “foreign policy books. I wouldn’t trust anything written after 2014. Do you see the titles and headers of all these new books? Talk about propaganda. Dont play innocent. People voted trump into power as a mock example for ridicule.

[thomcantsleep]

Benjamin Zephaniah

I woke up especially late today and discovered that Professor Benjamin Zephaniah had died following an ongoing battle with a brain tumour and it wasn't sadness I felt, it was shame. And it hasn't been the first time.

Benjamin Zephaniah has a strange, almost subliminal effect on my mind and possibly the collective consciousness. I don't think about his impact on my life and my creative upbringing and how he was integral to both until he finds his way back into my conscious through kismet. Then I realize what he has done for me in that moment and only that moment.

One time semi-recently, I was rooting through old, wrinkled books in my parents' room to decide what to keep and what to give away. Whatever exact books you are envisioning in your mind right now - let me tell you they were all there. Rankin, Patterson, Gerritsen but not just Sunday Times Bestsellers; C.S Lewis and Roald Dahl featured heavily from my parents' distant past as well.

There was another book that I don't remember owning but was apparently mine. I remember reading it in Year 8 English Lit but never buying it. It was a play called Face by Benjamin Zephaniah, a cautionary tale of how the reputation of a popular boy in school declines due to an accident that disfigures his face despite being essentially the same person.

It is disappointing to report to you, the reader, that my class did not like this play and it not being officially on the curriculum, it was sacked off. What I did as a 12 year old boy was knock one of the class copies of the book to read it in my own time. It was deeply interesting to me on a subconscious level because I grew up with people not liking me and not understanding exactly why.

I had forgotten all about this though and it's only sitting here now and remembering the several instances where my paths had crossed with Benjamin Zephaniah's work. Year 8 (8th Grade) was a tumultuous and impressionable time for me as I was at a crossroads between falling in with a bad crowd or concentrating on my love of books and writing and it's bizarre that that is the trade-off but societally, it is in school. If I hadn't read that play of my own volition, fuck knows what might have happened to me.

I'll share one more story.

Courtesy of De Montfort University

At my university, we had a surprise visit from the man himself where we were all made aware just a week in advance and excitement and tension shot through my veins. The only feeling I think I can compare it to is the combination of giddiness and dread thst cultivates in your stomach before you have your first kiss. It was a 10am lecture which I frequently struggled to get out of bed in the morning for. I was having difficult times in my social life and was suffering with anxious and depressive feelings a lot of the time. Knots and dread every morning. On that day, I was on campus two hours in advance.

I remember waiting in the lobby outside the theater for what felt like a lifetime and getting cold feet. I wanted to head back just because something in my head told me I was undeserving of being there. I don't know why those feelings existed in me but it's probably because I didn't have any questions for him, any books for him to sign and I was too scared to ask for a photo. I regretfully ended up having no interaction with him whatsoever.

As for his talk, he was as great as you'd expect him to be. He talked wondrously about his life story, the background of some of his most iconic poems as well as some perhaps lesser known tidbits but my main takeaway was how humble he was; putting himself below everyone in the room because he has zero academic achievement in his field. If nothing else, its indictive of the false credibility of the mechanics of academia. Especially after he had told us all of world experiences that would make your teeth itch.

From the official social media of Benjamin Zephaniah

And today, like every other time Benjamin Zephaniah has entered my conscious, it has been at a crossroads in my life where I struggle to sleep and wake up for my night job. It has been at a time when there have been doubts on my mind about my creative ability, where I'm going in my writing career and even if I will have one. I woke up to discover Benjamin Zephaniah had passed away and before I knew it, I was reading and watching everything that he had ever done.

And once again, I remember why I do this. Why I love this and why I want to achieve big things through prose and poetry. My will to not leave behind my dreams and accept consumption by the zeitgeist. Especially, in attitudes to how art is commercialized and capitalized in our modern world. Zephaniah preached absolute creative freedom. Anarchy in writing. He never shut up for anyone. He told the absolute truth and told it beautifully, no matter how stark the reality is.

Thanks to him, I will not throw this away.

This wasn't really a tribute so if you want to read one, I'd recommend reading this from my former lecturer, Prof. Simon Perril of De Montfort University.

[twopoppies]

I really hope you are doing well and want you to know how much I enjoy reading what you have to say. I can’t believe I’m actually writing this but here goes…for many many years I was a beard. Ok I finally said it. This whole Holivia situation has really made me revisit a very strange time in my life. I’m really torn because I’m trying to figure out why I did it and how it started , progressed and finally ended. I could go on and on but for me I actually had a deep crush on the guy and In the beginning, I must admit I chose to ignore the signs. He was very obviously gay, but I was really confused as to why he was being so flirtatious and why we were spending every waking moment together (his boyfriend was out of the country for a few months when we met). As time went on, he told me he was gay and kind of acted like it was obvious and I was an idiot for not knowing …ok I was an idiot but he really did lead me on In the beginning. As time went on I became very close to him snd his boyfriend, as well as his close circle who knew. It was so strange because I was never officially asked to become his beard but I just kind of fell into the role. I was never paid, never told not to tell anyone but I knew my role and I loved all the attention that went along with it.. from him and everyone around him. The situation made me feel larger than life at a time when I had very poor self esteem. It’s embarrassing as I look back on it now because I think it would be a cop out if I were to say I was doing it completely for him. We spent so much time together and I would drop everything just to be where he wanted me to and although I knew what the situation was, I will admit I was a little delusional at times when we were out, thst we were actually a couple. I know…what a sick puppy. Anyways, I in no way feel any empathy towards 🐙 and I really hate the thought of being in the same category. We really became best friends and those initial crush feelings eventually went away. I guess I have a ton more to say but let me start with this… I think 🐙 may have feelings for him… when you look at that smug face of hers when she’s leaning into him at Coachella… I know that look… it’s the “look at me…he’s holding me and look we’re so in love” look. I think she’s delusional even though she knows what the situation is…She’s obviously signed NDAs etc. and most of the time he looks annoyed and frustrated with her. I can’t get my head around her absurd behavior with the merch, the concerts, the need to associate with everyone connected with him…my situation was very different in this regard. But that look… that smug dreamy look on her face as she leaned back into him at Coachella … I know that pathetic look

G t

Ok, first of all, thank you for sharing this. It’s absolutely fascinating to hear from your side and I can actually really understand this.

In regards to Olivia, I’ve been saying this same thing for ages. She absolutely relishes the attention and the idea that people think she’s actually Harry Styles’ girlfriend — just look at her behavior at concerts. And I honestly would not be surprised at all if she had a crush on him at some point.

THAT SMUG DREAMY LOOK. YES! Exactly.

[rattyarts]

Huge-ask post (I am VERY funny)

Because I have so many questions that can be answered with just text, and I have mentioned my dislike of filling my art blog up with Words Words Words... let’s get them all done in one go!

(You guys can blacklist #rattytalks if you’re just here for the draws, btw)

A shit ton of asks under the cut!

Anonymous said: So for the center of the world, what with it being forcefully PG and all Bad Thoughts TM being prevented, how does having kids happen? Do parents just black out and wake up holding a child in their arms and vague memories of the last 9 months?

Ever seen a movie where they do that “and one day... a baby was born!” thing and a kid just appears offscreen with no explanation?

(This is how it works everywhere, Edgelands included; no one does the do or gets pregnant in this setting.)

Anonymous said: Hello! Quick question, and sorry if you’ve answered this before, but can other elves see the “intangible” bits of one another? Big fan of your work btw!

Nope! And thank you!

Anonymous said: Leopold was in my dream last night but I sadly cannot remember any of it.

I am SO sorry. I will try to keep my stinky murder men out of your head in the future.

Anonymous said: are the floaty bits stuck in one spot, or could the one they are attached to learn to move them around their body as long as its still within a certain distance? like, someone with the Floaty limbs, lets call him Ray, can move his limbs all over his body, allowing him to do all sorts of neat things that others with their attached limbs probably couldn't?

Whatever you want, honestly. As a general rule of thumb I don’t like putting down TOO many hard rules that prevent people from having fun with this setting. (Please ignore and scrap anything you think is stupid, I do this all the time and enjoy keeping this setting inconsistent and contradictory)

Anonymous said: Do elf names work off of Death Note rules, or is it like, if you know one elf’s name, all elves with that name are now unable to harm you? So if all the elf brothers are named Martin, for example, does it only work with blue?

I think it’s prolly just the one! Probably? Idk, might change if I think of something funnier.

Anonymous said: Can elves do magic on themselves or does thst go against the knowing name rule

Most people tend to know their own names, lol. So in my opinion, no, but don’t let me stop you if you got a fun idea.

Anonymous said: Could an Elf stitch on parts from another elf and have them work? i.e an Elf's finds the arm of another Elf. "Hey, free arm, might as well put it to good use", so they attach the arm and now they can give three high fives at once!

Same deal as previous questions, I personally would say no, but I also encourage people to do whatever the hell they want. It’s more fun that way!

Anonymous said: I bet elves are greasy to the touch.

They’re very powdery! Like if you rolled them in flour. And by flour I mean nasty glowing elf dandruff.

Anonymous said: Can elves fly or are their wings just for show?

No flying!!! (Unless you’re a mousefly)

Anonymous said: Something tells me that the elves would LOVE Obatzda.

Had to look that up, but definitely!

no1fan15: Not sure if someone asked already- Does Edgeworld have any equivalent to demons and angels? Like the old rubberhose cartoon kind?

Demons, yes! That’s what imps are: basically any demon, devil, or generic monster, but tiny! Even a couple of pop culture critters in there, there’s probably a very small gillman or robot monster running around there somewhere.

Angels, not so far. 

Anonymous said: How come Margaret hasn't yeeted George's jar into the Edge yet

I’d say being locked in a closet is good enough! (and also I need him for plot reasons, don’t tell anyone)

Anonymous said: If elves have knees bulges in the front then do they have butt bulges in the back?

i do not want to think about elf bulges

Anonymous said: So if you find a baby Therewoof and you say "aw you're so cute", their true name is So Cute?

Yep!

Anonymous said: Since a Therewoof's true name can be something like "cutie pie" or "dingus", does their name have to be spoken with "intent" for it to doggo-fy them? Or do they just have to live with the reality that any casual conversation/flirting can make them lose up to a month to Doggy Mode? My mom has little terrier dog named "Sweetie" so that got me thinking 'bout Therewoof names. & Anonymous said: here's a good question: If someone says a therewoof's true name, but not reffering to them, does it still affect them?

Just saying it will do! It’s based on those old werewolf stories where calling out the person’s name will change them back into a human/cure them, and a lot of the time it was by accident.

(My favorite is the one where they slam the door on the wolf’s tail and then say his name, and the dude ends up with a wolf tail for the rest of his life.)

Anonymous said: Would Seeing eye Therewoofs be a thing?

I... guess? Probably? Since regular dogs can turn into woofs, yeah. You might have to start paying em once they turn into a person tho. 

Anonymous said: Was ChalkZone ever an inspiration for you? Because I just love the silly world of ChalkZone and I noticed getting that same warm feeling when thinking about Edgeworld.

Maaaan, I wish. I’ve only seen about three episodes or so, but it seems really fun!

Anonymous said: So I saw your mimic post, and even though I don't think I've seen any other of your art before I was absolutely HAMMERED with an indescribable sense of slightly unsettling strangeness and comfortable familiarity. Your art feels like something from like, an old point and click computer game I would have had formative memories of before accidentally losing or scratching the disc therefore making me unsure if it ever REALLY existed. Sorry for being weird but I love the wacky nostalgia feel here

Aaaaaah, THANK YOU! That is SUCH a cool comparison and I appreciate!!!

Anonymous said: If the Edgeworld is based on cartoons then is there a Reverse Edge-world that’s based on anime?

Lol, I mean I DID have an anime phase for a while there, so...

caydebug: Man I’d love to see this as a cartoon some day

Honestly, same. Best you’re gonna get is the occasional animatic or gif, tho.

Anonymous said: Does anyone..."go" in Edgeworld? or is it like Pleasantville where bathrooms exist but there are no toilets in them because acknowledging it is yucky?

Oh god I keep getting asked this and have been avoiding it like the damn plague. But... Uh. No. No they do not. I am begging you all not to send any followup questions.

Anonymous said: Have you considered putting computer viruses or illnesses in with the buggymen? Since those are typically called ‘bugs’

Sure!

Anonymous said: are there any limits to what an Animimic could posess? i.e if they were in a costume of a Buggieman with multiple arms, could they control all of them? what about a small Mousefly costume? can multiple fit into one costume like a clown car? and what about in pitch black darkness, where you can only see the lights of their eyes and not their bodies? could one fit inside the pocket of a jacket you are wearing and help you steal things/wield a gun like a living turret?

Since clothing fills into the body type of the intended wearer, they would indeed be able to control all arms/legs in buggieman clothes.

Size restrictions is one of these things I wanna try to be vague about: I personally have been imagining them sticking to hiding in things no smaller than, um. Maybe imp sized, but really, whatever. It’s a cartoon eyeball critter!

You can put multiple animimics in one outfit!

They can move around just fine in darkness without being off screen, yeah!

And sure why not. lol

Anonymous said: I know you have been asked this once before, and you said nah you don't, but with a few more months of worldbuilding, do you have an idea for what could be down the edge now? 🤔

Not really! It’s not super important, honestly. I’d say any fan theory is about as valid as anything else I can come up with.

ps2polpo: I doubt you’ll ever elaborate on The Edge but I like to imagine there’s just one dude there like the Nowhere Man from the Yellow Submarine movie. Mostly cause the thought of someone accidentally winding up there being like “where am I?” And there’s just a guy casually waving at him like a friendly neighbor is funny to me & Anonymous said: The implication that the Edge is the physical manifestation of edginess so there’s probably like, Trevor Henderson monsters hanging out down there.

See above question! Valid! I also accept falling forever, getting erased from existence, ending up in another universe, getting stuck in limbo with thousands of other people, whatever you want, really!

Anonymous said: " he has very few bones and weighs basically nothing, " "Fastball special" trope, but with Leo?

YEET THE NASTY MAN

Anonymous said: did you ever watch dragon tales as a kid? because george and margaret make me think of murderous zak and wheezie from that show, and i love it to bits

I did not, but I would have loved it. Definitely up my alley!

(watched Quest for Camelot a loooot, though!)

Imma go ahead and stop here! There’s more but I’ve been writing for well over an hour and I have things to do. If your question is missing I’m either saving it for later, wasn’t entirely sure how to answer, or it’s spoilery.

Will probably do another one of these at some point!

[mariaantonnietta]

Let’s talk about the Gintama 2 Movie!! (Be Forever Yorozuya)

AI wanna talk timelines, timelines!!, I saw the movie again and with the manga finished I want to discuss theories about it!!

Hello! Is me again, I want to talk about the second movie, because after seeing it I always want to try to desipher what happened in the timelines we didn’t see play out! Of coure these will be at best theories that are we can’t probe, but I still want to try to guess! And now with the manga finished, I think is time to revisit it with all the date we have!

I will talk about the second movie, the manga end, and everything, so stay with me having that in mind!

Firstly, this movie deals with time travel (fairly well I might add, I realycould follow all the time twists and make sense of them), and I believed it wise to add a timeline so everyone follows along. Behold my horrible graphic!

Haha, there are some things to say about the drawing. From left to right, The first line is to separate the time-points nothing else, (the movie was released at june 2013, the manga volume for the shinigami arc was december 2013, so I don’t know if I am being  a bit generous there, but in timeline I think it only matters is before Shogun assasination (after which it get serious until the end), and that it is before that point)

The other are the first (and first’s branch),  second and thrid timeline, I didn’t count Tama going to the past to bring past Gintoki as a separate timeline and more like a  little branch of the first because when Gintoki is sent forwards they converge (you can also see it as the rest of that branch dissappearing). All of them are in a sense a branch from the first timeline, but this one converges so.

(ask if something else isn’t clear, I tried T-T) 

Well now unre the cut the  rest of my silly ideas and theories!

A comment, but the only thing that is a bit out of place is Tama surviving in the second timelime?, like shouldn’t her be erased like GIntoki?, I think is either that she would otherwise cause a bigger loop (she doesn’t exist as time machine there->Gintoki cant kill his past self->Genma makes her a time machine->Gintoki kills his past self-> she doesn’t exist as a time machine->...infiinitum) She is the one that allows the timeline to exist. The other is that she is in a Schrödinger' situation that as long as the possibility that she will exist in the future exist she will (gintoki dissappeared because his posibility of future was erased as he killled his past self). Or time machine power makes her inmune to paradoxes, who knows...

Also, we don’t talk enough of  Gintoki dying in this movie. Both Enmi Gintoki of the first timeline, the past Gintoki of the second, and the  protagonist Gintoki we follow in the movie (first timeline branch) are erased, and from now on we are following the Gintoki who’s the future of the Shiroyasha of the third timeline. (the one who helped us fight the Enmi, from now on he’s the protagonist)

The same about the kabukichou people, I mean, nothing changes practically, except maybe the Joui members having seen something strange that day.

1) Now, something I wondering was if the events of the first timeline ocurred in the same way that in the third one. Was there a Shogun Asasination arc?, A silver soul arc?

Well, no. I think that there events unfloded differently...because GIntoki dissapeared for five years, and he did it  before the shogun assasination arc (this not only for the date release, but also the jovial athmosphere at the start at the cinema)

But did the events of the story play on in another manner without Gintoki regardless?, Why, I sure they did. 

Okay, follow me on this. I do not know if the shogun assasination arc happened or not (even tough a parallel can be made of Katsura and Shinsengumi alliance in both places), but I think that even if it did, it didn’t happen at all as planned.

I think everything went into disarray with the virus (don’t we know about that), any plan was left into the air, and Nobunobu or Shigeshige are in charge depending on their luck.

I also want to know what happened with Utsuro and the Tendoshou in this timelime.(Because cm’on, don’t tell me I am the only one who believed Enmi GIntoki looked a lot like a crow ) I want to know if Takasugi is dead or not, and how he died/where he is. (I asumme Sakamoto is fine, maybe helping people, is Zura with those clothes and Gintoki words, Gintoki going to the terminal that make me worry)

So, I started gathering those points and I believe I reached a theory about this.

Okay, so follow me. These are the things we know about the first timeline.

Gintok soon after watching the movie discovered he was infected with the virus. He suspected it was the Enmi, went to talk of the past with Zura to clear his mind, talked wiith Gengai about making a time machine if he didn’t came back. 

Left the Yorozuya to investigate if there was a solution, tries to kil himself when he doesn’l  find one. He fails. He has not other choice but to wander as he sees the world be destroyed by his own hands. 

I posted this photo because of the ships that surround the tower and attack it. It doesn’t say when this attack took place after he left, we could only see that he wasn’t there. But this image looks fairly similar to the one when the Altana liberation force attacks.

The tower also looks very similar 5 years later as after attacked by the altana liberation army. (I checked also with how it was when the Tegenism ship fell, it looks more like the after the attack)

(After Initial liberation army attack. Third Timeline)

(Five years later. First timeline) Probably they didn’t have resources to rebuild with everything falling down with teh virus. Why would some army attack, I think that maybe the earthlings that escape, some had the virus, that probably expanded it onto another planets, that now made the problem worse in the universe and some people really mad at the planet from where the infection came from. Or, it could be rebels, like the Kihetai, that are taking advantage of the political turmoil to attack their actual objective (the terminal, with the minawabanwu maybe too ) Or both.

(Two years later third timeline) I added this to show how it doesn’t look like the terminal we discuss, so I think if something happened, it happened earlier more than later. (Or later, but it was only one incident and not 2)

Another thing we know is that the Enmi look a lot like the Tendoushu. I compared staffs and things. Wondered if there were related to Tengenism (the weir religion that launches the last arc)

Well, It’s not basic staff like tendoushou, but the decoration is different tha the tengeism. The clothes are also similar but not the same (I know the these arcs came later, but sorachi could have used different designs and not similar ones, you know, also, it’s just throwing ideas)

(Enmi at the start, checked, Enmi Gintoki uses the same one (and same clothes))

Oboro staff is different. Tengenism have the same type. Tengenism symbol are wings (phoenix), not Enmi. But the similarities are there too.

So, we all know the Enmi are nanomachines that are used to destroy worlds right?. I wondered if Utsuro could survive that. The answer  I reached was that it depended. If the Enmi virus only worked on humans, it would probably not kill it. ut if after killing humans it affected animals, then plants, then destryed the planet vitality, well, that would do it. It would depend of how lethat it actually was. (in  the last case, he would be the last to die, and Gintoki would be the only one who survives as the new vessel...moving onto the next world until he dies naturally or some poor bastard kills him)

 Well, I’m gonna asumme that the Enmi would destroy the world to that point, because they were described as ‘beings  that caused damage enough to leave a planet uninhabitable’ and the other ‘uninhabitable’ planet we see is Kouka’s, that is dying and its Altana was almost nothing when she left. Zura said they were forbidden or being restricted because of this.

So we know the Enmi were beings that could destroy worlds,(probably up to their lifeforce), that were contained by something, that someone attacked the terminal tower looking a lot like a pseude liberation army, and that Enmi’s dress is eerie similar (but not the same) to the Tendoushu.

I believe they were also a ting the Tendoushu kept to themselves, a fraction that can destroy a planet to the point of leaving without life (Altana) sounds like something they would regulate. Maybe mercenaries was  a cover up, or maybe it was both.

Was the first timeline all Utsuro plan? Well, too many jumps there. I believe thst he vouldn’t do that trapped with Shoyou, I think that in the first timeline he did as in the last arc, he saw that mortals used that virus to harm the others, and decided to make use of that. He of course was the cause that they attacked the Terminal and is probably happy that all the universe may perish of disease.

Maybe.

Or maybe that was the plan, and Takasugi stopped him. (There are too many factors to see how things developed. But either kihetai + harusame maybe + minawabanshu and some others killed utsuro, or they died either fighting him or from disease)

The way GIn is dtanding aside as the ships atack the terminal (he can’t join) makes me think some kind of final battle took place.

(Gorilla might not know how Gintama was fgonna end, but he did have some ideas, and final fight at the Terminal tower was one that stuck all the series)

Does Gintoki know of Utsuro?, Who knows?  If you want my take, I think Takasugi and Utsuro both died figthing each other. As the terminal exploded.

I think he eventually at least, found out. Because he decided to go die there.

(also because you know, final fight at the terminal.)

2) In the second timeline everything is much more clear. Young GIntoki dies. I see 3 options unfolding

a) the one I call the normal one. GIntoki dies, people mourn him (because Gintoki just erased his future, not his past, young Gintoki body should remain), either Zura or Takasugi kills Shouyou (probably Takasugi, I’m thinkin so because Oboro mostly, he would pick if not shiroyasha, the other more known at the frontlines one, but could be either way), and is a bit diffrent but in practical mostly the same.(maybe some things are held back and the shogun asssination hasn’t happened yet, or maybe it did, who knows) We can’t tell more than thi.

b) Probably not route. shouyou discovers that Gintoki’s died and it gives him strenght to make keep Utsuru more in check, he uh...destroys things, there’s no need to kill him for now.things advance more or less like in canon,  with a lot of things we don’t see 

c) I cry route. Shouyou discovers what happened, and it kills off his personality (sends him to sleep at least). There’s no need for either Zura or Takasugi to kill him. They never find his master at the war (maybe they are told he is dead, and don’t believe it). They didin’t kill his master, but los Gintoki to who knows who, and don¡’t know what happened to master, Thingd happen more or less like in canon.

 3) Here someone (probabky kurokono!...ok no, leave me dream), wakes GIntoki from his drunk sleep and he and the joui 4 see a bizarre image of people from 15 years in the future attack the Enmi.(of course they don’t know this) They brieftly join them. They see from a distance how the future people dissapear. They continue with their life.

(That last one is canon, haha)

As you can see nothing has been cleared and these are mostly cool theories, a lot of other things are possible. But I don’t know, wanted to talk about it.

[whump-town]

ajadhkhdh that's okay! The gist of my ask was: what do you think abt Derek and Aaron's (platonic) relationship? I really think it's the most underrated friendship within the core 7. (Then again, I'm generally biased towards the two of them) so I was wondering if you had any headcanons/fic ideas for them specifically? Like after the events of Restoration, or after Hotch reveals thst Emily is not dead, that sort of thing.

I do have an ask for Restoration Hotch and Morgan so I’m going to go ahead and include what I wrote for that plus what I thought of when you asked this^^:

They’re a match made in Adrenaline Crash Hell.

Problems with authority?

Issues trusting men?

Trouble magnets?

It unnerves Haley every time she kisses her husband goodbye knowing she’s sending him out there with his equally as injury-prone partner. She loves Derek Morgan. He’s a doll and she invites him over for dinner all the time (also to occasionally get him to help Aaron do handy-man stuff around the house because she loves her husband but the man doesn’t understand woodwork at all).

They’re an unstoppable pair. 

Hotch is a fantastic sharp-shooter and he makes quick work of tongue-tying any cops that get into their way. Not to mention his legal knowledge gets them one foot in the door and guaranteed loopholes in problems that other pairs can’t solve.

Morgan is a charmer and paired with his good looks, he gains the trust of victims with ease. Not to mention, he’s fast on his feet and a close reader which means he won’t miss a single piece of evidence in a file. He excels in defusing explosives and that’s what sets them apart. 

It’s why Morgan gets sent back to Quantico with fragments of a bomb to put back together when Hotch gets sent to the hospital. 

Morgan stands in the bullpen, numb as he watches over and over as the news plays that scene on repeat. Just as it ends, they play that little clip-- the men wearing FBI kevlar and cops infiltrating the building. The radio static and Gideon’s voice giving the okay to move in. Morgan wonders when he’s going to get the call-- when Gideon’s voice is going to come through his phone and tell him he has to call Haley.

To tell her Hotch is dead…

and Jason Gideon killed him.

He manages to forgive Gideon for making him feel that hopeless. What he can’t forgive is what Gideon does to Hotch.

“The Black Queen--” Hotch informs him, one hand firmly planted on the wall ahead of him and the other tightly gripping a sleek black cane. He’s breathless and struggling to work through the pain that feels like it’s in every nerve of his body. But he’s refused Morgan’s help three times and he won’t cave on that now. 

With a sigh, he forces his body upright. His leg gives and Morgan grabs his shoulders. “Alright, man,” Morgan grunts and he forces Hotch back into the wheelchair the nurse had given them just in case. Good thing too. He lets out a breath of his own, feeling extremely better now that he won’t have to watch Hotch force his body to move in ways that it clearly does not want to.

Morgan pats Hotch’s shoulder, “what were you saying about this Black Queen chick?”

Despite just being taken off of bed rest and only being okayed for short walks this week, Hotch has already hired two new members of the team. Of their team, because as far they know, Jason Gideon will not be returning and Hotch is acting Unit Cheif until they can find somebody better-- which they know is a ploy because no one else can do the job.

Which makes the two of them the only members of the team. 

Living, that is.

Hotch chews on the end of his nails as he informs Morgan about the hacker recently caught in the FBI’s web. It makes him smile, Morgan can appreciate Hotch’s creativity in this new team. He’s good at this.

JJ had been the first person Hotch hired. She’d joined their little force last week as a media liaison and Morgan liked her right off the bat. She’d come to the hospital and Morgan had watched in shock but extreme amusement as she took right to arguing with Hotch. Not in a bad way but more of a “No, sir, you won’t be getting any paperwork until your doctor signs off on it. As that is the requirement you have to meet under federal guidelines and… because I said so.”

Needless to say, they love her. Not many people have the balls to tell Hotch no. It makes her perfect for the job.

She makes their jobs easier and she fully understands that while Hotch and Morgan are not currently physically capable of the job, it is in no way waiting for them to be ready.

There’s a slightly maddened look in Hotch’s eyes as he leans forward and tells Morgan about how much a genius this woman, the Black Queen, is. Then again, the poor man has had nothing to do for weeks and he’s taken this small task and really ran with it. It definitely doesn’t help that he’s desperate need of a hair cut and in pajamas. 

Going to interview Penelope Garcia is the first time Hotch leaves the hospital in months.

He’s promptly taken right back but he’s smiling the whole way.

Their team of four has weekly meetings in the hospital. 

Then Hotch hires Reid.

It’s strange at first but one night, as Morgan’s falling asleep it suddenly occurs to him-- That son of a bitch. Hotch and Morgan both struggle to trust men which has had a lot to do with Hotch’s hires being all women. Then Hotch does hire another “man” and it’s some scrappy-ass runt of a genius-- so, of course, Morgan hadn’t even flinched. He hadn’t even thought twice before taking the kid under his arm.

Of course, Hotch has Reid spending all his time with Gideon but he’s still a part of the team. 

But Hotch heals and returns to active duty. Gideon stays on campus. 

And then it all comes crashing in once again.

Morgan is the one to advocate for Elle. He doesn’t say a word to Hotch-- he doesn’t know why. He just goes straight up to Gideon and tells the man that they can’t pass up on a spunky woman like Elle Greenaway. 

He gets the impression Hotch doesn’t completely support this idea-- not Greenaway, just not the idea that Morgan went to Gideon instead of him.

Their friendship... struggles as Hotch takes on the full responsibilities of Unit Cheif. He’s not as fun and Morgan would prefer hanging out with the kid and Elle, so he does. 

Tobias Hankle forces them to confront that ruined friendship the moment Derek Morgan utters those simple words: “you’re a drill sergeant”.

But they remain one in the same.

“I have and always will entrust you with my life. Can you do the same for me?”

“I love my job, man.” “You love him more.”

“I don’t want you going to see Burford.”

The stand-off between the federal agents standing in the middle of the police station is clear. A battle that goes past wills and the inhibitions of troubled youths. The kind of trouble that runs deeper than still water. Trauma that grown men can’t shake. That these grown men haven’t shaken.

“Hotch, I can do this.”

Maybe, Hotch considers. Maybe Derek can to a certain degree. The way that Hotch handles it after case. The way they all handle it. “Fine,” he relents. He can’t burn the bridge between the two of them over something as stupid as egos and abusers. Not when their pasts intertwine the way they do. Braided. “Fine but I’m coming with you.”

Because if they’re going to do this, they’re going to do it together.

More or less.

There’s no denying how weak his own knees feel as Hotch watches Morgan take Buford’s hand. So, when Morgan looks him dead in the eyes and lies-- and deceives him with the excuse that he’s going to “use the head before we leave” Hotch lets him. It’s the same small infraction he’d need Morgan to allow him. The same infraction Morgan has allowed him.

“Derek? You did a great thing out there.”

The jet has been silent, for the most part. It’s only the right amount of small talk, mangled by Dave’s encouraging words. Mangled by the call.

Hotch recognizes the tone, the far off look in Derek’s eyes as he pulls his phone away from his ear. “What happened?” he can hardly push the question past his lips. Because he already knows the swell of tangled emotions. The way that anger melts into fear and doubt. The way relief wraps its cold fingers around your sternum and burns with the passion of loss. 

Because deep, deep down… Hotch still loved his father. 

“Carl Buford is dead.” 

Bile stings the back of Hotch’s throat but he remains silent and still when Morgan stands. He assumes the other man is feeling the same burning disgust. Anger with himself for being upset. Anger with Buford for making him love him in some twisted way. 

And Morgan can’t find the means to understand it. Hotch loved his abuser because he was his father. Carl was… Carl was nothing and everything and Morgan crawled his way from the muddied pits of hell without Carl and yet--

“Breathe--” he can’t even make it to the bathroom before he sinks to his knees. “It’s alright.” It’s taken Morgan years to get to a place where the presence of another man, hell an older man, doesn’t startle him. Still, sometimes someone steps too close and he flinches or gets frustrated and he can’t even explain why. 

But Hotch surrounds him. He uses his body to block the other’s from Morgan’s direct line of sight and all Morgan knows is the painful throb in his chest and the reassuring hand placed on his back. Morgan finds comfort in that hand. In Hotch who he knows without a shred of doubt not only understands but shares a fraction of his pain. 

“Just breathe, Derek.” 

Hotch looks up, his knees aching from squatting. “Blake, can you grab a water bottle? JJ, can you get me a rag?” He stays right here beside his old friend. So much as changed from those beginning years as two young and dumb agents. 

But they’re still the same broken men. 

“Hotch?”

Hotch shakes his head, “I’m right here, Derek. Always.”

[cartoonfangirl1218]

Winner’s Curse Ch. 18

Another long one but I felt it was needed to flesh out Jade who is basically a blank slate in the books, and it was fun to dive into the family dynamics of Aladdin villains. TW: abuse. Enjoy! 

“All right let’s go” Uma commanded as Gil ran off at his captain’s behest/ The group began walking when Jordan stopped to ask the figure still standing by the balcony.  “Aren’t you going with them?”

Uma audibly sighed, showing her irritation but Jade flopped back down on the ottoman to listen, she was curious, besides she hated the political meetings. It was all just infighting and boundry setting and for people like Uma to fight who was more powerful.

“No. My mom wants me to be the high priestess of Opar, not it’s princess. I’m not needed for political meetings if I’m not destined to rule.” Lala’s tone was all nonchalance but Jade sensed it was a lie.

And a lie she found when she searched her face, and saw the tall tale sign. Several signs actually. She was examining her nails rather than looking them in the eye, licking her lips and clenching her teeth.

Liar, liar, liar.

Sooo obvious too. Jade had learned to control those revealing twitches when she was like 7.

“Aziz can join me. You can watch me practice the magic of ancient Atlantis. Lost to all time and elusive to all.” Lala swung her arms dramatically, her accent becoming more pronounced and loud, mimicking her mother’s self-indulgent proclamations.

Seeing that Aziz was about to walk out beside Lala like he was a regular every person of equal standing and not the slave boy they were trying to sell him as.

Honestly did these people not know how to sell to a lie. They had to make it believable!

“Hey!” Jade threw an arm out, “Few steps behind. You’re not a prince here, slave boy.”

She added her trademark wicked smirk to soften the words. Well she hoped it made the words gentler. Sometimes the wicked smirk backfired and people misinterpreted it as her rubbing it in. Or other times when she was trying to goad someone like the Gaston twins and they thought she was flirting. Ugh it was so annoying that she couldn’t control the reaction to her smirk.

At least Aziz seemed to understand her intent and mockingly bowed to her, “So sorry princess.” He turned to Lala and grabbed her hand and kissed the back of her hand as he followed her out, “My priestess.”

With that settled the genie girl went back to her bottle that Calix was holding and they set off in silence which unnerved Jade.

Silence was never a good thing in her experience. It always signaled an impending ambush.

“He didn’t kiss my hand.” Jade fake pouted thinking of the first thing that came to mind as they stalked through the long dark hall.

“Yeah yeah, let’s just go to the Coven meeting before Nerissa complains that we’re late again.” Uma rolled her eyes, picking up the pace, and Jade bristled. She knew people tended to underestimate her friendly, joking attitude. That’s what she wanted, it made people drop their guard low enough for her to steal but still... it was annoying how people thought they could just roll their eyes in front of her.

She was the best thief on the Isle. She had skills and they knew it even if her attitude didn’t always reflect how serious she took her pickpocketing. Come on, she practically stole every one of Captain Hook’s pirate hats without getting caught by his rowdy, drunken crew. She was not to be underestimated.

They didn’t need to roll her eyes when she talked as if she was an insignificant idiot.

So she pushed past Uma who was in the lead and strutted her way to the large half circle table that Morgain Le Fey had suggested to be their meeting table to avoid even more fighting. The adults sat on the interior and their kids on their interior so they sat across from each other with a clear view of the rest.

Jade slowed her swaying hips as she approched her seat across from her mom whose lips were already turned down in disgust. Her mother was forever exasperated when Jade did things like flirting or strutting or simply acting nonchalant, seeing it as more evidence that she had no ambitions and was too flighty to make something of herself.

Not that she cared. At least she had to remind herself that she didn’t care. It was part of her new “Keep yourself sane” plan ever since Mom decided to take an interest in her life and make her into a sorceress like she was.

15 years of neglect, only paying attention when Jade was in trouble and now she wanted Jade to make someone to be proud of?

No way. She would try to learn sorcery just to get her mom off her back and hold off the rain of punches but she wasn’t going to waste her time acting the part of evil sorceress to win her mother’s approval.

She gave up a long time ago the hope that her mom would ever change her mind to love her. Or her mother would change in general.

Jade looked around at the rest of the room. Most of the people were here. Like Celia and Dr. Facilier were at the right end of the half circle playing some sort of bakor card game and next to them were Zevon and Yzma crabbily whispering to each other. Well Yzma was whispering and pulling at Zevon’s ear while Zevon just cowered. Yzla was no where to be seen which made sense. Yzla usually ditched anything that involved spending time with hercrazy, hairball hacking mom, preferring the chance to concot chemistry explosions in the secret lab without her family’s interference or unneeded advice.

Next to Yzma was Uncle Jafar, polishing his staff and brushing Iago off his shoulder wheneverthe ornery parrot got too close to take a look at his beak. Jay was still a hypnotized statue, standing in front of his chair, waiting to be instructed on what to do.

Jade had to resist the urge to command him to sit down and generally not ignore him. But it wasn’t her place to. 

They were just cousins and on the Isle that was the same level of trust and caring as a sidekick and his boss. There was none. She couldn’t act like she gave a damn about Jay’s well being, not if she wanted to have her mom kick her bleeding heart out of her chest like she was always threatening to do.

The seat next to her mom was occupied by a brooding Mozonroth, tapping his fingers impatiently as he stared at the empty seat across from him/next to her that should be occupied by her nephew. Strange that he hadn’t arrived yet. Antiqam was so like his father being meticulous and punctual and methodical in everything he did. Being late just wasn’t him.

It was just as well. If there was a relative that she didn’t give a damn about. It would be her half brother, Mozonroth and his equally repulsive son, Antiqam.

Her half-brother just creeped her out with how he always sounded like he was flirting with everyone. The suaveness belying his ruthless demenour underneath and Antiqam followed in his footsteps being too touchy-feely with groping someone’s chest as he described how he wanted to stab them in the heart.

Most people were in awe of their ruthlessness, hoping to aspire to them like those who wished to be the next Mistress of Evil after Maleficent. Or they feared them for those same reasons. But, she, she saw nothing to fear and nothing to idolize. Just hate.

And if she was being honest, a part of her dislike toward them was pettiness because they were her mother’s favorites. Like it was her fault that she was born on the Isle and she had had no chance to take over any area in Agrabah. Even if she was to conquer some place on the Isle, what would it be? The garbage shack on the South Side? What a score.

She looked to her left, hoping to distract herself from thinking of annying family members and saw thst Uma was absentmindedly drawing words and drawings on the table, no doubt planning out the next steps of whatever it was they were doing. Her mother was boredly finishing off a plate of fish and chips from her resturaunt and Mother Gothel and her daughter were simultaneously admiring themselves in grimy mirrors. The rest of the left side was crowded by the mothers without kids around like Queen Grimhilde, Queen Nerissa, Maleficent, Queen La, and Morgain Le Fey with Circe and Calix rounding out the end, not speaking to each other.

She had heard the loud fights between them in the parlor next door to her room. The unofficial area to air out secret plans and have family fights. From what she could hear through the walls, Calix was still an Auradonian good guy through and through and trying to convince his mom to leave the Coven and help them fight when the time came while his mom was all onboard the revenge train and didn’t trust the Auradons after they sent her to the Isle and tore her away from her home.

It was very very interesting. Almost as good as the soaps Jade sometimes caught when she--

“Have you’ve mastered levitation yet?” Her mom’s reedy voice cut through her thoughts.

“Um I was..” Jade took a small breath in and smiled sweetly to her mother who scowled, “I was getting a nice foot massage from my new slaveboy. It’s important to use our enemies and degrade them.”

Nasira rolled her eyes, angrily huffing through her nose. Jade instinctively leaned away from her when she saw that. It never ended well for her face.

Shockingly, the person she least expected to be thankful for came barging through the doors, red with rage.

“Who the hell stole my genie!” He bellowed, his black robe billowing around him and dark hair dishelved and plastered against his forehead in a rare image of him at his least presentable.

“Zevon did it.” Uma said cocking her head toward the oily wannabe emperor who was sinking down in his seat.

“Why would yaaargh? She’s mine!” Antiqam lunged at Zevon who fruitlessly tried to squirm under the table but Antiqam was faster. He pounced on the teen like a coyote, twisting Zevon’s high collar around his neck causing blue veins to bulge around his forehead to match the angry red one throbbing at Antiqam’s temple.

This was one example where Antiqam strayed from being exactly like his father. Antiqam was cool and calm, scarily collected most of the time with all his ‘I”s dotted and “T”s crossed. But when his plan was derailed, that all snapped.

Jade looked out of the corner of her eye to see how her relatives were acting to this, all expressing various levels of exasperation as Antiqam thrashed Zevon around on the table.

Uncle Jafar was looking gloatingly at her mother as if to say, “So that’s how you grandparent?” and Mozonroth was facepalming, vexed at his son’s unchecked anger and violence.

Even the “accomplished and perfect” Antiqam disappointed his father by not keeping control of his emotions. How satisfying.  

Jade personally thought it made sense. Antiqam acted so calm and suave all the time, and repressed all his emotions like annoyance and anger. So when he reached the breaking point, he became a incoherent rage, letting it all out on the poor fool.

Similarly, Zevon had no parental support on his side as Yzma rubbed her temples, “I’m so disappointed in you.”

“Antiqam. Tawaquf.” Mozonroth punctuated his commands with two sharp raps on the table with his armored gauntlet, grabbing his son’s attention who promptly dropped a bedraggled Zevon to the floor.

Antiqam didn’t say anything. He just inhaled deeply and brushed some invisible dust off his shoulders as if that would draw attention away from his outburst that left a bruised Zevon who was on the floor groaning and grappling to get back on his chair.

“He shouldn’t have stolen my lamp. What did he want it for?” Antiqam hissed through his teeth, his anger still audible but starting to retreat under his usual self possessed attitude.

“What you wanted it for. Genie sex.” Calix answered with obvious disdain, earning him a glare from Zevon across the table for ratting him out.

“How do you know all this?” Antiqam turned to look suspiciously at him.

“We caught him.” Uma said, referring to herself and Calix.

“Then give i the lamp to us.” Mozonroth’s dark eyes seared across the table belied by his strained smile that revealed he was refraining from bashing someone’s head himself.

Antiqam cocked his head, a cat-eating-the-canary-smile playing about his lips, “Wait, aren’t you friends with my genie? Circe said she knew their family back in Auradon? Have you’ve been hiding her from me? Protecting her?” 

Jade flinched. She knew the punishment that would ensue if they were found protecting someone. 

“Even after you two said you’d join and obey the Coven?” Queen Nerissa finished the train of thought that was forming in everyone’s heads.

No, no no, no. This was bad. Very bad. Why did Uma and Calix say they’d infiltrate from the inside? If either of them stepped a teeny bit out of line, they’d be done for. No one here would trust a former Auradonian or the sea witch that left the Isle for months. They were viewed too much as invaders. They had something to gain if the Coven failed.

But she… people thought she’d have everything to lose if the Coven failed and that was why Yzla chose her as the perfect double agent.

Time to prove to Uma that her breezy attitude was nothing to roll her eyes at.

The adults’ voices were beginning to raise in anger and confusion with Circe’s cutting through the noise with the fierce proclamation,

“Don’t you dare accuse my son of anything. He is a loyal person unlike you backstabbers.” Circe hissed.

Hmmm maybe there was hope for getting the Grecian sorceress on their side. Hope enough that even if she didn’t actively help them, there’d be hell to pay if someone hurt her son.

“Oh, Queen Nerissa, you must be really insecure about your intimidation if you think two former goody goodiness would disobey you.” Jade laughed, jumping up to wrap her arms around Uma, “They’ve been far too busy the pleasures of being in the Coven to even think of ever going back to such sacherrine goodness. After all, they don’t have me in Auradon.”

To make her point, she kissed Uma’s neck and was promptly pushed away with a hiss, “Don’t touch me!”

Ursula looked disbelievingly at Jade, and Jade shrugged, “Yeah, it only happened once. Can’t say Uma really knows what she’s doing in the bedroom. Too uptight.”

Uma clenched her fists, mouthing some obscene threat but Jade rolled her eyes at her. Ha!

“As for this guy,” Jade walked over to Calix and planted a deep kiss on him, relishing in the surge of performance as everyone watched their tongues tangle, completely oblivious to her fingers wrapping around the lamp that Calix had been holding under the table.

She pulled away from Calix, smiling at the slightly punched drunk gaze she left him with. Slipping the lamp into her long sleeves that almost fell to the floor.

When she returned to her seat, her mother was the one facepalming while Uncle Jafar looked surprisingly impressed at her manipulative seduction abilities. Uncle Jafar always prided manipulativeness while her mom didn’t. 

Her mom preferred more direct action and said that her brother had his priorities messed up if he did everything manipulatively. Maybe if he was more direct, he would have made sure to kill Aladdin so that street rat wouldn’t have defeated him in the end. 

She turned to Antiqam holding the lamp to his face, “You’re being overdramatic for no reason. I have the lamp, dear nephew.”

“Why didn’t you return it to me once you caught Zevon, dear aunt?” Antiqam asked tersely.

“Because I wanted wishes.” Jade smiled, inspecting the pretty brass object for the first time, tracing her figures across the curling cuticles.

It was so ordinary. Brass was one of the easiest metals to find on the Isle. And lamps like these were utterly useless to beat back the cold, windy winters on the Isle. She’d thought if a genie had a lamp it would be something sparkly and shimmering with a thousand encrusted jewels or sparking off like a firework just like the genies were themselves.

But it also fit. Jade mused to herself. Something so unsuspecting and ordinary could change her life.

“Jade, I know listening isn’t your forte, but we went over the plan. When we take over Agrabah, we’ll each have a genie. Jafar will have the male, your mother will have Eden and we’ll have this one.” Mozonroth explained slowly, smiling at her as if she was a child.

“I did listen. But I wanted wishes now. And unlike Zevon, I am actually thinking out what my wishes will be and not going to get tricked out of my genie.” Jade said, “I have plans of my own.”

Her mother looked up at her curiously, a strange smile spreading across her face.

Pride.

A proud smile. Her mom had a proud smile for her!?

Jade couldn’t stop the hopeful lurch of her heart at the sight. She never thought she was capable of making her mom proud of her.

After all her heists, the wrestling matches she won, this was what made her mom proud? Stealing  genie lamp from her grandson?

….Or was it the “I have plans of my own.”

How many times had she heard her Mom lecture that she should have plans of her own.

Her mom was sure proud of her. For echoing her. Not for Jade’s own actions.

“Jade should have the wishes.” Her mom said, interrupting whatever retort that was about to come out of Mozonroth’s mouth. “What?!” Jafar, Mozonroth and Antiqam stared at her mother, the rest of the Coven sporting similar shocked looks at the small family drama unfolding.

“She’s already been using Aladdin’s son as her slave boy. I’m sure she’ll think of something equally degrading for the genie when she makes her three wishes.”

“Thank you, Mom.” Jade clenched her jaw tightly to prevent any traitorous sound of glee from coming out of her throat.

She didn’t care. She didn’t care. She didn’t care. She had to keep reminding herself that. She was not about to do things for her mom’s approval. And if she accidentally recieved her mom’s approval she shouldn’t be happy about it. It was like fool’s gold Shiny and wonderful but temporary. It would not last or provide any substance later on.

“Well then, I’ll go spend my wishes now!” Jade said brightly, deciding to add to her mother’s newfound pride, “And I’ll go study magic now too.”

Hey, might as well keep her mom off her back for the rest of the day.

“Wait, we’re making plans!” Queen Nerissa called out, “This is a Coven meeting not an episode of As the Crown Turns.”

“Oh I love that show! Did you see the latest one where the mermaid found out her husband slept with her twin sister?” Gothel cried.

“I saw that coming from a mile away.” Queen Grimhilde hooted, “Why wouldn’t he. I mean the girl’s a fish. At least her twin had legs to-”

“Ladies.” Queen Nerissa shouted, until there was calm once more. “I’ll get this over quickly since some people claim they have “better things to do.”

The plan will commence on next Sunday at the height of summer solstice. We must start our preparations on Monday and work throughout the week. That means no one is leaving the castle or exiting,” she made a significant side-eye to Uma and Calix. “All magic user must rest and save their strength for the takeover. Remember we strike to kill. No more of this “make them suffer first” nonsense. That allows them time to think and take over and that’s how you all failed the first time. Think on that. That’s all. You’re dismissed.”

Jade jumped up and ran to the door where Uma and Calix quickly met her. “Give me.” Calix grabbed the lamp possessively and Uma pushed her back, “What the hell was that out there?”

“One, I can’t give this to you. It’s called committing to the lie. And two, it’s called kiss. You clearly haven’t had much experience with that, Shrimpy.” Jade shot back.

They didn’t have much time to talk more since Circe and Ursula swept by, taking their kids with them.

“Congratulations.” Celia grabbed Jade’s arm and gently shook it.

Jade felt herself melt a little seeing Celia’s sincere congratulations and genuine smile.

It was a stupid, sentimental feeling but she preferred kids to people her own age. She didn’t have to act cool. She was older, she was automatically cool. So that was one less stress on her life.

Kids were the opposite of everything she prided herself for. They didn’t know how to hide their emotions that well. They didn’t feel the need to act cool and were very eager to praise others when someone did something cool. They couldn’t lie very well which was annoying when she was among her peers but when kids did it, it was adorable.

And Celia was a pretty cool kid if she had to call a kid cool. She was feisty, sassy, and was always quick with a scam. If there was one thing that bought her respect was someone who knew how to make a quick buck.

Also since she joined the Anti Hero Club, her respect for Celia had elevated a bit. Not only could she con people out of their money, but underneath the Facilier smoothness was loyalty.

She knew she should have expected it since it was a club for secretly heroic kids despite the confusing name but to see it in action brought an unfamiliar yet comforting feeling to see people that were capable of trustworthiness and loyalty and that if succeeded, she could meet other like-minded people. Instead of being constantly on guard and acting casual among villains who’d be willing to stab her in an instant to rot when all she wanted to do was be alone and safe.

Yzla informed her it was called hope. She was pretty sure that was also a good guy thing. Another strike against her if her mother ever found out she was capable of feeling such goodness.

“Thanks. Bye!” Jade waved as Dr. Facilier grabbed Celia’s hand to take her back to their shop.

Jade headed toward the stairs where the dungeons were, watching as the rest of the family headed up to the rooms.

“Jay follow me!” She clapped to get hypno-Jay’s attention and wiggled her fingers at Antiqam’s scowl. If she hadn’t been on Antiqam’s radar before she knew she was on it now. Hell, she may have made his hit list by getting to use the wishes before he did.

But she repressed those concerns to the back of her mind. She’ll deal with it later when the time came. Hopefully never.

She reached the dungeon floor, it’s dank smell of blood, and seared flesh filling her nostrils as she entered the hallway. The only open door was at the end of the hall, the one leading to the torture room and she could already hear the faint gurgling sound of someone choking. 

She winced and moved quickly through the hall, opening each door as she went.

Each Coven got their own magic workshop, each styled for their specific magic and decorated so people wouldn’t get confused since all the doors looked the same.

She checked each room, opening it fully to the one that smelled of blood lilies and the walls were dusted with sand from her attempts at levitating.

Jade stared at the book that was still left open on the table and sat her chair. Jay standing at the door staring blankly at her.

“To levitate an object, one must “flap and clap” your arms focusing on your third chakra. Fire is needed blah blah blah.” Jade read outloud and shut the book in disgust. She read those words like thirty times this morning, she practically memorized it but that didn’t help her in actually doing the magic.

The closest she’d come to levitating the sand was by throwing it against the wall in frustration, and then her mom checked on her and..

Jade slumped in her seat and tried to get herself to focus on the book again. She had to learn something. She had to show her mom she could do something or else.

A wave of phantom pain washed over her as she thought what would happen if her mom decided to stop by to observe her progress.

The beginnings of a migraine were pounding in her temples as her mom’s distinct hiss bounced around her head. “You can’t do anything? Nothing! What is wrong with you, Jade? No, don’t answer that. I know exactly what is wrong with you.”

Jade instinctively flinched, feeling the invisible blows her mom pounded on her.

“You have no discipline! No ambition! You’re acting like a slut with no wants in life! You are a waste of space! Nothing is in your head! I should have left you to die in the desert like I did after I had Mozonroth! He made something of himself. Here, I am telling you to do better and you do nothing!”

She had managed to speak a little. That she was a good thief. More like a whisper, but her mom with her cold calculating senses picked up on everything, “A thief? That’s what you want to aspire to? You’re descended from sorcerers and you want to be a fucking thief! You’re disgrace!”

Her voice raised and lowered in random intervals, as if Nasira couldn’t think of whether to laugh at such foolish, unambitious dreams or be even more enraged. She chose the latter, Jade remembered. She had the marks to prove it though she didn’t remember much. It went by in a haze, her mom’s face contorted monstrously as she yelled. The persistent, never ending hits to the stomach and face.

She could feel a heavy weight press down against her just like when her mom leaned over her. Pressing all her weight and bony knees into her chest that Jade was sure she was going to puncture it. Her spindly fingers clawing into Jade’s mouth, drawing blood on her tongue to stop her “ear bleeding screeches.” Those screams were just the sort of thing that showed people how weak she was. She needed to toughen up.

Jade cursed herself internally. She knew this lesson already. Just act happy, just act casual, act nonchalant, act angry. Her casual attitude may irritate her mother but she would usually leave her alone. It was when she acted sad or scared her mother would get vicious. When she sensed weakness, she attacked.  

Her throat closed and her thoughts jumbled into one overarching message, “She was a failure and her mother was going to kill her for it. She was a failure and her mom was going to kill her. ShewasafailureMomwasgoingtokillherShewasafailureMomwasgoingto killher.FailureDeadDeadFailureShewasgoingtodie.Uselesswasteofspace.

Jade experienced these sorts of panic attacks before. She needed some water for her throat. Her lungs were heaving with sobs and air that fought to win over her tired body. Her hot tears streaked down her face and the overwhelming pain, sadness and hopelessness within that threatened to engulf her. She needed to get out of this room with its levitating spells and reminders of her mother.

“Hi Auntie Jade!” A cheerful voice giggled and Jade slowly turned her head to see the chubby small form of her little nephew, Malik. “Antiqam wanted me to check up on you.” Despite the swirling thoughts in her head and the overwhelming waves of panic, some seperate part of her melted at Malik’s complete inability to lie and that, out of all people, Antiqam chose to send his 5 year old brother to spy on her despite the kid being incapable of spying or understanding the bigger chess game they were playing. 

The kid was too young to do subterfuge and even if he did, he was too sweet. He wasn’t corrupted yet to hate her.

“I’m great,” Jade gulped past the lump in her throat, lurching unsteadily to the door, “I need the bathroom.”

The migraine made the rest of her body feel heavy and unsteady when she walked to the bathroom in the middle of the right side of the hall. Once she approached the bathroom she threw up into the sink.

It disgusted her. Not so much the contents of her stomach but the fact that she did it. Just thinking about her mother's abuse and this is what she was reduced to? Throwing up in fear of what the witch would do to her.

She knew she could handle it. It was practically predictable at this point. Curl in a ball as she hit and kicked and scratched, hide in her room, do makeup, act like nothing happened until the next time she did something wrong. Even now she felt ashamed that that was her strategy in dealing with her mom. She could grapple with the Gaston twins with no fear, but with her mom, she just froze up. She had survived the pain of living with her mother for years, why was she so scared now?

Maybe it was like Antiqam's rage? She’d been repressing it so long, all the anxiety and fear was hitting her now.

Whatever it was, she didn’t need it at this moment. She had important things to do for the Anti Villain Club. She couldn’t fall apart now.

Jade trembled against the cold tiles of her bathroom and clenched her fists in an effort to still her quaking body. Her breath was coming in short desperate pants and it took all of her willpower to remember to focus on her face in the mirror, watching herself as her breath became slower and slower.

She blinked rapidly to try to clear her eyes of the tears that were still threatening to fall and scrubbed at her face with some of the brown water that came out of the rusty faucet. Even though the Coven had their powers, and were able to create jewels, transformations and shadow spirits out of thin air they still weren’t able to magick up some way to get better pipes for fresh water. They would get those sort of things when they went to Auradon.

Jade patted her cheeks, making sure the blush wasn’t rubbing off and noticed with distaste the smudgeness of her mascara dripping down her cheeks.

Then Lala walked out of the other stall, her ever-present leopard staff under her arm as she washed her hands, and Jade froze.

Quickly splashing water over her face, she rubbed the remnents of her makeup off and reached into the small pocket she had sewn into the underside of her sleeve for emergency makeup supplies.

She sniffed and forced herself to smile. That’s what people expected of her. She was the flirty thief with no care in the world.

Maybe it was time to work on Operation: Future Friendship with Jungle Girl, part 22. Concentrating on other things usually helped her to not dwell on the memories.

Jade was used to getting what she wanted. Whether it was a one night stand or Queen Grimhilde’s youth moisturizing cream. She was going to get this girl to warm up to her if it was the last thing she did.

She couldn’t believe she was trying so hard to do this. A mere 3 months ago, she would have laughed at such an idea of working to be friends with someone on the Isle when they were bound to betrayal.

But three months ago she wasn’t part of the Anti Heroes Club, working to undermine the Coven and her mother from inside.

It all began when Yzla invited her to the Anti Heroes Club, and they'd gotten closer to the hope that they’d get off this forsaken place that she started considering the idea of a real friendship.

Yzla introduced the concept to her first. She had been practically salivating over the idea of unlimited fresh food  when she said, “Imagine. We could actually act like friends instead of claiming we’re just an alliance.”

Jade was taken aback by Yzla’s outspoken proclamation and admittance that she wanted to say she was Jade’s friend, one simply did not say they were friends after all it was a mushy princessy feeling, but then again, Yzla was more progressive than other Isle kids, being a budding scientist and researching all those newfangled theories.

Jade hadn’t been sure how to respond. Sure at the moment she smiled and agreed, keeping up the friendly facade she usually kept among people, but she still had to think about it. And when she did, she realized Yzla was her friend.

With Yzla, she didn’t feel the need to act like the edgy yet friendly dreamgirl she was with everyone. She was just comfortable with Yzla, she wanted to hang out with her just to talk or rough up some pirates on the docks. Hell, that’s why she joined up on this mysterious club so quickly. If Yzla said it was legit, it was legit.

Beyond their first meeting, Jade hadn’t hung out with her with the intent to steal. She had been careful never to express any personal, emotional topics, they always edged around the “too real” conversations but she had come close a few times. Almost admitting that she wanted to stay at Yzma’s house so as not to go home and face her mom who may or may not be in a bad mood.

But if they were friends…. if all the Isle rules about being tough and no honor among thieves was gone… then she’d tell Yzla in a heartbeat. And she’d want to hear hers about Yzma’s insanity and Zevon’s bullying in all its gory details.

She felt safe with Yzla. They mocked each other at times but ultimately, they had each other’s back. That was a rare thing to feel but if that’s what friendship brought to her life, she wanted more of it.

She supposed she could count herself friends with Gil LeGume too. She also enjoyed hanging out with him, and she knew he would never hurt her on purpose. But he was loyal to Uma’s side. Which she could respect. But she had no idea why he’d want to voluntarily hang out with such a bossy sea witch.

Although she was still a bit insulted by his suggestion that she join their crew for protection. Protection! As if she’d go crawling to them for help like she couldn’t handle her mom on her own.

Well she couldn’t handle her mom to be honest, but others didn’t need to help her either. She had been just fine surviving alone all her life.

So though she wasn’t enthusiastic about the idea of joining a crew or gang, yet from the few friendships she had seen, it didn’t make the people in it look as weak and manipulatable as her mom claimed.

Uma’s Crew for example.They were so in sync they were unstoppable. And it was Jay’s bond with his three friends that allowed them to stay in Auradon and defeat Maleficent. And she might as well start planting the seeds now and get one jump ahead.

So that’s why she approached Lala and tried to talk to her, she figured having a trained warrior would be a great asset in her future friend gang. Especially if she hadn’t really fought anyone else on the Isle so people wouldn’t be familiar with countering her moves. But it turned out Team Genie or Uma or whoever the leader was already got her on their side before she defected out of fear of her mother.

Jade wished she couldn’t relate.

She wanted to get Lala back on their side, and actually join the fight. She had a feeling they would need the experience fighting skill. And if she ended up getting a genuine connection out of it. Bonus for her.

However, her usual tactics to chat Lala up hadn’t been working. Even though no one trusted anyone here, most people were easy targets to her charm.

A bit of flattery, admiration, acting like she wanted to be friends with benefits with all the trust and intimacy and Auradon-like crap. But none of that was working. Lala was too reserved and solitary. She didn’t get any of her sarcastic jokes and when she did it was a light laugh like she was about to cough.

Jade supposed being raised in a jungle probably accounted for the poor socialization still…..

How can this girl not fall victim to her and her flirty, friendly girl talk? She was everyone’s type!

She thought she got the jungle girl to warm up to her a little when she suggested Aziz become Jade’s slave boy. It had been clear when they saw Aziz in the dungeon that Lala wanted to help him out of there but didn’t know how. After all, why would the daughter of Queen La care anything about the son of Aladdin whether he lived or died.

However, it made perfect sense for Jade to want the son of her family’s enemy to suffer. That’s why she suggested they let him live to serve as her slave. Uncle Jafar had been all in for the plan and even her mom grudgingly approved of her idea to degrade his morale.

That’s why Yzla dubbed her the unofficial queen deception. Make it to look like she was satisfying her family legacy of evil while secretly protecting Aziz. Albeit with a few perks like the free massages and feeding her grapes. To make the lie convincing, of course.

Lala looked briefly, dare she say grateful, but although Lala hung out with her and Aziz more, she still maintained an impersonal distance that Jade couldn’t crack. She’d react to Jade’s conversation but she would with monosyllables. As if conversing with Jade was beneath her. 

Jade managed a friendly albeit watery smile which Lala responded,

“A break?”

“Nope, meeting’s over. I'm taking a break from magic to redo my mascara. Want some? It would really go a long way to lengthening your eyelashes.”

“Hmmph” Lala sniffed, the highest indicator of someone about to make a bitchy comment, “You should go back to working on your magic. Makeup is a useless vanity. Trying to cover up the fact that you weren’t born pretty. They’re more important things like survival and fighting skills. Makeup doesn’t help anyone.”

Jade inhaled. That was the thing everyone thought.

That makeup was a silly girly thing for beauty-obsessed women like Mother Gothel and the Evil Queen. That on the Isle, she should be focusing on more important things. That liking makeup made her a weak girly princess as if her gender and her less muscular physique wasn’t enough to count against her.

Her mother’s voice echoing in her head that all that makeup made her a slut. A slut who wasn’t even being useful or smart to use her sluttiness to steal from people. She was acting like some sidekick or a future harem girl with no ambitions.  

Jade clenched her teeth, her mother’s words fueling anger instead of fear in this instance. Jade told herself over and over that her mother wasn’t right about that. Just because she didn’t share her ambitions, didn’t mean she was devoid of any brains or wants.

And everyone else was wrong too! They thought makeup defined her. Confirmed what they already thought. She was a silly girl, waltzing through life, occasionally pickpocketing. Not a serious person. Not a serious threat. That’s what they think makeup said about her. But they had no fucking clue what was underneath the makeup.

They didn’t see how most of her personality was just an act so she could steal from them. They didn’t see how good of a thief she was. Jay got all the glory for that. Even though he was gone, people still thought he was the King of Isle Thieves even though she was right there!

She could fight as well as Jay too. The years of taking Nasira’s abuse made her faster and more nimble in getting up again while others laid groaning and nursing their wounds.

While Mozonroth and Antiqam and the rest of her family used fear to make people give their money, she worked in subtleties. Acting like a cool friend, and being able to seek out others weaknesses for later blackmail purposes. She made people like her so when she stole from them, they were less likely to go after her in revenge. How was that for intelligence?

And makeup was a part of that. It didn’t make her vain and frivolous. It made her fit the part of a beautiful, charming thief. It helped her survive the Isle.

“Makeup is not only about vanity! Makeup is as much a survival technique as punching someone’s nose. The right shade of lipstick can make you a ravishing seductress or.. or a monster. Makeup makes you invincible.”

Lala snorted but Jade interrupted her before she could speak, her teeth clenched tight to keep herself from the loud volume she wanted to emit. The loudness that she wanted to shout so people would stop underestimating her and her subtle lies.

Subtly that allowed her to survive this long.

Everything went slower. She slitted her eyes like she’d often seen her mom do before attacking. She took in every inch of Lala’s body,, searching for the one thing she could use to make her point and bring the jungle down a peg.

Her face looked fine. Slightly flushed. The rest of her body was also fine she supposed. Jade wasn’t sure since it was all covered with clothes so….

That was it.

“It does make you invincible. Makeup covers all your imperfections and bruises.”

Time for the final blow. She was going to make that girl pay for thinking she was better. She was as weak as the rest of them under the thumb of their parents.

“You look as if no one has ever beaten you in a fight.”

Lala didn’t talk much, she was all action. And what Jade observed of her action was that ever since Lala got a supply  of non-animal skin clothes, her clothes covered everything. And she’d stand in front of the mirror making sure it did.

Jade knew that action well.

How many times had she stood in front of the mirror, looking from every angle to make sure her bruises didn’t reveal how weak she was under her mother? That her makeup didn’t let the abuse show?

She could bet that Lala was trying to cover up the same thing despite her superior than thou attitude towards makeup.

“So yeah, makeup is important. And…” Jade made a point of knowingly looking Lala up and down, “You look like you need it.”

It was almost comical to see how Lala froze up in front of her, her brown cat eyes wide with shock that Jade figured it out. Followed by a quick offensive.

“How DARE you!” Lala growled, “I am Que- I mean, Princes- no. I-I’m Ranavalalona! Heir ugh warrior of-“

Crap crap crap! Jade could tell by the tense way Lala clutched her staff that she was about to engage in a major street brawl and this bathroom was too tiny for it to be a fair fight for her.

All the anger she had been building up dissipated in an instant. Time to backtrack to friendly mode!

”Okay calm down,” Jade lamely grabbed her mascara wand and held it in front of her and oddly enough, the small item made her feel safer. She could manipulate the situation. This is what she did, and maybe if she played it right, she could turn Lala into a genuine friend for later purposes.

“Calm down and cut the bullshit.”

The move was a risk but she knew she made the right one when Lala’s grip lessened. Her gut was right. Lala responded to no-nonsense than friendliness.

“Stop the whole “How dare you inferior peasant” act. I know that’s how our parents act but we’ve seen where that got them. Auradonian heroes and us, their kids are rebelling against them. Besides, we can try to act like our mothers all we want but that’s not going to make them any more proud of us or magically decide that we’re worthy heirs. I know how you feel. That it’d be easier to give in and hope that we’ll become their favorites. But it’s never going to happen whether we obey them or not.”

Lala didn’t respond, but she did lower her staff, and she wasn’t breaking eye contact. Jade could practically hear the unsaid dare.

“Prove it. How do you know how I feel?”  

So Jade said what she had wanted to tell Yzla, what she never admitted out loud. That she hated being “toughen” up and that even though she didn’t want to follow her mom’s legacy, she hated being the unfavorite. And maybe, just maybe Lala would agree and sympathize.

“My mom wants me to be a sorceress but I suck at it. I can’t even do a “simple” levitating spell. At least Uncle Jafar is proud that Jay is a thief and doesn’t have all these unrealistic expectations for him to become a genie or something.

I’m an even better thief than Jay and no one is proud of me for that. People don’t even realize it! That’s how good I am. People still don’t know their stuff is gone!

But noooo. Mom’s favorite is still Mozonroth because he has magic, he conquered the land of the Black Sand, he accomplished things. That’s not even an accomplishment! No one was living there. He didn’t conquer anything, he basically saw a bunch of sand and put a palace on top of it.” Jade ranted, relishing the chance to criticize her mother’s unspoken favorite since even when Nasira was putting her down, she still wouldn’t declare that she loved anyone. Even her children.

“So yeah, I could try to put effort in doing what my mom wants. But it’s not worth it. She’s done nothing for me and she never will. She wants me to survive life on my own and conquer others, and that’s exactly what I’m doing by taking her down.”

Lala didn’t say anything, she opened her mouth, closed it and then pushed past her to the door.

Jade felt a sinking feeling. Allah, she rambled on for nothing. Now Lala probably thought she was such a weak, needy person who complains about her abuse and..

“Can you find makeup for me?”

Jade whipped her head around to see Lala looking at the floor, but she understood the deeper meaning in the question.

“Yes! Totally!” Ugh need to dial back the enthusiasm, she may have spilled her feelings but she still had a reputation, “I’ll find something when I have time.”

Lala nodded, a little less curt this time and swept into the hallway where Aziz was patiently waiting for her to leave the bathroom.

Jade was so enthused by this new potential ally-ship she decided to neglect her mascara for once and get back to her workspace where Malik was tugging at hypno-Jay’s arm, chattering on excitedly.

“Malik, alhabiba, he can't really talk now.” Jade pulled him away.

“Why not? Why is he frozen?” Malik asked

“Uncle Jafar hypnotized him.” Jade answered.

“Why?”

Jade knew she could go the honest route and explain how awful Uncle Jafar was and how he just wanted to control people. But she knew it wouldn’t go over well for them to find out she was trying to turn Malik against them. “Well, you know how your dad always says to respect your elders. Jay wasn’t doing that so Uncle Jafar decided to make him.”

“Oh okay,” Malik easily accepted the answer, his eager amber eyes already scoping out something more interesting to catch his attention. And his eyes landed on the lamp.

She knew what he was thinking. No doubt his older brother had explained to Malik the power of genies and everything wanted to ask for his wishes.

Though she doubted Malik had started his malicious streak yet. She heard Mozonroth had started grooming Antiqam when he was around 7 so Malik was a pretty innocent kid for now.

Nonetheless, she didn’t want to call the genie out of her lamp for personal wishes. From her weekly Anti Villain lessons conducted by Yen Sid, it was not good to force people follow your command without asking if they wanted to. Which Jade personally didn’t think it made sense in the case of genies. Wasn’t that what they were for?

But Jade was trying to follow the good path and so she wasn’t going to use the wishes for her personal gain, and she wouldn’t allow Malik to do so either.

Though it was tempting. Jade stared at the gleaming brass. So tempting. One rub, one wish and she could be the sorceress her mom always wanted her to be, maybe be even better than, exceed her in power and prestige and pummel her into the ground for once.

But she knew that they could go wrong too. She heard the stories. Aladdin tricked Uncle Jafar to become a genie confined to his lamp. Abis Mal complained that his genie tricked him out of his victory over Aladdin. Zevon being tricked by Jordan via “genie sex” whatever that meant.

Yeah, maybe she shouldn’t touch that lamp.

“Malik, go play with the book. Maybe you can do magic.” Jade suggested, handing him the leathery tome.

“Like Daddy?” Malik asked gleefully.

“Yep, just like your dad.” Jade smiled as Malik eagerly dragged the heavy book across the floor, making blasting sounds as he did, “Woosh bam bam! Pshaww!”

The lamp caught her eye again as the shine glinted off her jade necklace. She shouldn’t touch it but she still wondered.

What would she do if she had three wishes right now?

Jade leaned back to fully admire the lamp and bumped into the motionless Jay.

Jade sighed. Poor Jay. This unmoving hypnotized Jay may have his face but none of his spirit. The real Jay would never stay still this long nor go without inserting his opinion or boast. If he was there right now, he’d waste no time and impulsively rub that lamp.

She turned to fully face Jay and unknot the crisp and perfectly neat manbun from his head. There, his fly-away raven hair was much better. Wild and free like he was.

Even though she and Jay weren’t close like people expected them to be, what with being cousins and making a killer thief duo, she still felt like they were unconsciously close. They had the sqame background, a similar lifestyle, same interests and attitude towards life. She’d hate to be hypnotized against her will just because her mother didn’t like what she was doing with her life and she’d like to think Jay would try to stop it from happening.

And maybe if they had been from Auradon, or if they had had different parents, they’d be a lot closer like she’d seen on tv of Queen Ariel’s sisters all hugging each other.

She remembered the day they grew apart. Unwillingly but they had obeyed their parents and stopped treating each other as close relatives. Barely acting like a friend.

She had been 6. Jay 7. Uncle Jafar had come to visit their tiny shack shuffled up against the block dubbed Hun-Town, since that's where Shan Yu and his armies’ families settled. It had been fun, Jade remembered. Things were usually fun when Jay visited. Their parents were all too eager to not be bothered with them as they bemoaned their forgotten glory days while she and Jay ran around, leaping over fallen bricks and assorted piles of trash and jumping off of roots in early attempts to parkour.

They had run into the living room, at least they called it a living room. It was just half a room with a sheet in the middle to separate it from the kitchen. The only thing that made it a living room was a sagging bean bag chair where everyday some new mutated bug would come crawling out of it.

Jay and her had been play-wrestling. They had gone through 4 rounds at least. He had won 2 and she’d won 2 and they were trying to break the tie.

Jay had her in a headlock, choking off her air and she couldn’t break free no matter how much she shoved and punched at his ribs.

“Mercy.” she cried as per agreed stop word. “Mercy!” She pleaded too loud that time.

Jay loosen his grip slightly giving Jade time to resume her attack again. She punched and prodded at his sides, surprised and delighted when he let out a snort.

“You’re ticklish?” She yelled.  

“No-no I’m not! That’s not-That’s against the rules!” Jay laughed trying to push her away while simultaneously getting back at her.

“Tap tap”

They were so caught up in their play fight they didn’t hear the sound of her mother’s approach until

“What are you doing?”

They looked up innocently at her mother whose fierce scowl made her look like one of those broken gargoyles that Claude Frollo used to decorate his home.

Before either could answer, Nasira took a step toward Jade and Jade instinctively scooted backwards.

“Did I hear you ask for mercy? Is that what you do in a fight, give up and hope your opponent will accept your plea for mercy?”

“We were just playing.” Jay’s sole voice piped up but he was young and small and faded in the background compared to her mother’s angry presence that was cornering her against the wall.

The corner of the wall that was becoming oh-so familiar already at the age of 6.

“And what was that tickling and laughter about? I expect you to be better, Jade! If you’re going to play-fight, you need to act like it is a fight to the death. Why did you ask for mercy? Because you were acting like it was a game or you knew you are too weak to win?”

Jade didn’t look at her. She wanted to be invisible.

“Answer me!”

Jade pressed herself against the wallpaper, hoping against hope that this would be the time she would finally blend into it or at least her mother wouldn’t bother snatching her from her corner so she could beat her on the open floor.

She could hear the frustrated snorts as her mother inhaled and exhaled angrily, she could sense her mother’s shadow looming above her but she couldn’t bear to turn her face away from the wall.

There was a pause and a suffocating silence as her mom looked down on her.

Jade’s insides trembled though she kept the rest of her body as still as a rock. She bit her lip, feeling the drip drip of blood down her chin but she wouldn’t make a sound. She couldn’t do anything. She couldn’t. The moment she whimpered or twitched, her mom would strike.

But she was a child and she couldn’t keep still forever.

She didn’t know what she did. Was it an exhale that had signaled her mom to attack. Had her mother noticed her fingers scrambling against the wallpaper? Maybe for once, her mom hadn’t waited for a sign of movement or weakness but simply chose that moment to begin her blitz.

She dragged her by the ankle to the middle of the living room as Jade screamed in a mixture of pain from the rough wool and splinters on the floor and fear for what was to come.

The worst part was how silent her mother was. The only sounds were Jade’s screams which honestly scared her even more because she knew she was the only one who seemed to hear them. That no one was going to help her escape this.  

“Look at me.” Her mother hissed. The second most horrible sound next to the silence. Her mother didn’t say words, she hissed them, her teeth constantly clenched together with a little air seeping through. “SS ss ss.”

Jade meekly curled into a ball on her back, her knees up to cover her stomach and covering her eyes with her hands but not enough so she could peek through her fingers at the horrifying sight of her mother’s eyes wild with rage and the rotten wood of her mother’s crude replacement staff poised to bring down blows.

She tensed waiting for the familiar but insufferable pain. Instead she felt something warm, and soft and slightly leather pulling her close like in a hug? She opened her eyes, it wasn't something but someone!

Jay jumped in front of her just as her mother was about to give a blow on her head. Her staff came inches from smashing Jay’s face when she reeled back in horror.

“Are you protecting her?” She screeched.

Before Jay could reply, Nasira stalked off to yell into the kitchen, “JAFAR!”

Jafar came pushed past the sheet, crumbs from the meal of molty apples and spoiled honey staining his pajamas and mixed with his small beard and Iago pecking at his fingers for a bite.

“Look at this! How have you’ve been raising your child? He’s protecting her!”

“Jayal iban Jafar!” Jafar yelled, roughly plucking Jay off of her and cuffed him about the face, “What have I’ve told you? There is no team in I. You do not help others. You don’t protect.”

“But she’s my cous-” “That does not matter. You can ally with each other for stealing but you should not protect each other. It will not help you in the long run. What if one of you gets captured? Are you going to stay behind to help and go to jail too? Ridiculous! Boy, you only got to look out for number one.” Jafar explained with Iago yelling “Yeah!” for emphasis after each sentence.

“Sorry, Aunt Nasira.” Jay mumbled after Jafar’s lecture which Jafar groaned, “Don’t say “sorry,” Jayal!”

“Just take him away.” Aunt Nasira scowled in disgust and glared at Jade, “I hope you listened carefully to that, daughter. That this was a lesson for her to take to heart too. If I see you exhibit such selflessness…” she trailed off leaving Jade to cower and move back to her safe corner. Her mother rolled her eyes and followed her brother and Jay as they went back to the kitchen, and Jade licked her wounds in silence.

Jay looked back at her. His large child-eyes sympathetic for that brief moment they made eye contact but Jafar grabbed his ear and turned his attention away with the promise of an extra helping of food.

After that, Jafar didn’t bring Jay over anymore. Probably at the behest of her mom that they were getting too friendly.

She had forgotten about that incident. Shoved it far down the trove of her memories until she was around..hmm 15 maybe?

She had asked her mother how come Uncle Jafar and Jay didn’t come over? Did they have a fight like the De’Vil siblings?

Mom had replied that they weren’t Auradonians, family wasn’t important, they didn’t have a need to hang out with each other or protect each other.

Protect each other.. That had brought back all the memories. She nearly dropped the costume jewelry she had been holding, they came to her so fast and so vividly.

She didn’t think Jay remembered that incident either. Maybe he hadn’t been as important to him as it was to her? Maybe bigger traumas came to him after? Maybe he also repressed it?

Though she had no proof, Jade had a feeling memory repression was something a lot of kids did on the Isle. With pain coming every day in various methods and forms, it was the only way to cope, forget some of the pain instead of feeling the weight of it all.

The first time they had talked was after an Aladdin-haters club. Mom had already headed home but she stayed behind, hoping to find some good steals for dinner. Jay approached her from the backdoor and gave her a high-five.

“What’s up, Jade? Man, I haven’t seen you in forever.” “Oh you know, items to steal, people to charm, I’ve been busy.” Jade shrugged with her standard reply when meeting up with people she hadn’t seen in awhile.

“Nice. Yesterday, I stole Ursula shell necklace.” Jay bragged.

“Oh, really? For the first time? I took that ages ago.” Jade tried to puncture his pride with a little white lie but he was unruffled.

“I’m not surprised, you always go for the easy targets. I just went because it was a slow day.”

They smiled at each other, waiting for the next one-upmanship when Jay burst out laughing and Jade had to laugh too. They both knew the other was lying. It was second nature and they could either go on like this all night, coming up with more ridiculous and outlandish heists that they supposedly got away with so they decided to drop the pretenses.

“So how’s Aunt Nasira?” 

“She’s..” Jade bit her lip, unsure of which of the many adjectives to describe her. Hostile? Neglectful? Annoying? Stranger that I happen to live with? 

“Herself. And Uncle Jafar?” “He’s still the Prince of Pajamas.” Jay informed her, “Iago came up with that. Dad loves it.”

“I’m sure.” 

“It’s too bad that he and Aunt Nasira had some sort of fight. I’m mean I know they were never close but-“

And that’s when she knew, he didn’t remember.

Sure, he would brag about how he was a lone wolf and there was no “I in team,” but it truly seemed like he didn’t remember how “no I in team” applied to them.

She laughed it off, echoing her mother’s words, “Jay, we’re not Auradonians. Family is not important.”

And so, she kept her distance from him. Yeah, she met up with him for occasional heists and on the odd birthday celebration or other, but she didn’t seek him out. She didn’t want to be too friendly.

Perhaps she was protecting him via avoidance which would be going against what their parents wanted. That they would not protect each other from harm. But she couldn’t help it.

She’d seen her cousin around the Isle with that gang he hung out with. She could tell from the slightly defensive stance and the way he positioned himself at the front of the others. Jay may like to be in the thick of the fight, but he was also protecting the others from receiving the harder blows. It was in his nature to care. Just like he was the first to come roaring with honor and pride when the Gaston twins insulted Jafar for his faltering figure. Jay cared about his family, his father included despite him not being the father of the year. He protected them from the insults of the strangers.

And if given the chance, he’d protect her from the people within their family too.

And so she had to make sure Jay never had a chance to be the protective cousin for her, it was better for him. He wouldn’t have to deal with the fury of her mom and the punches that came with it.

She experienced that enough that she didn’t wish that upon anyone. It was hers to bear alone.

Suddenly a strange tingling came over Jade. Like a hum in the air that something was about to…

“What’s happening now, guahhwhoareyou! Who are you?”

“Ahh!” Malik and Jade yelled, Jade jumping away from her thoughtful standing position to face an unfamiliar stranger in her room that was enveloped in pink smoke.

Jade coughed, flapping away some of the fumes and realized that the strange girl was the genie she had seen justly this morning. Only she looked so normal. What was it she said? Yeah, mortal form. She looked mortal like she could pass as Aziz’s sister.

His very ticked off sibling.

“Why do you have my lamp?” Jordan demanded of her.

“I- I didn’t touch your lamp I swear! I just had it for safekeeping. I’ll-I’ll explain. Malik? Did you rub it?”

“I wanted to see the genie.” Malik said, not taking his awestruck eyes away from the other girl.

Jade couldn’t blame him. She had been very intimidated by the genie girl when she first saw her this morning. In her true smoky pink genie form. She was overwhelming to fathom. The perfect hourglass figure. Looking gorgeous and magical and she was real. In a land of impossibilities and disappointments and broken dreams, a real life genie of myth and legend was standing in front of her with the ability to grant any wish she could imagine.

Jade felt like she was standing at the edge of a cliff as she looked at her. Adrenaline pumping, it was thrilling, and  horrifying to imagine all the ways her life could be changed with three wishes. Everything would be in reach. The impossible genie was real and nothing would be impossible for her anymore.

And like falling from a cliff, she had no idea how she’d feel when she went through with it and what would happen to her at the end.

“Hello? Anybody there?” Jordan impatiently waved her hand in front of Jade’s face.

Jade snapped out of her reverie and swatted her hand away, “Ye-Yes I’m here.”

“Is this thing with you stuttering and staring off to space going to be a regular occurrence?” Jordan crossed her arms

What was wrong with her? According to her relatives, genies were supposed to be zany and somewhat annoying with their showboat personalities? Not rude.

“No.” Jade scoffed, annoyed that she had been thrown off her composure. “I’m sorry Malik rubbed your lamp. But he’s just 5, he’s not good with rules.”

“You don’t look like a genie.” Malik blurted out, apparently ignoring the conversation that was going around him, about him.

“And he has a thing to learn about tact.” Jordan raised a sardonic eyebrow, “You’re a lot like your cousin, Jay, little one.”

“Jay’s not his cousin. Wait.. actually yes he is. Just um I think Jay’s his second cousin.” “Huh?”

“Mozonroth and I are Jay’s cousins. Malik and Antiqam are Mozonroth’s kids so they are Jay’s second cousins and my nephews.” Jade explained.

“Your family tree is very confusing.”

“Yeah I want to have a family tree done up after all this is over. My brain hurts if I think about it too much. I mean Mozonroth’s my half brother and Aladdin’s half brother but Aladdin and I aren’t related at all so that’s just weird. And-”

“Can I have my wishes now?” Malik interrupted.

Jordan pursed her lips in what Jade could tell was a suppressed smile as she bent to her knees to answer him, “Yes, alhabiba. First off, some ground rules. No wishing for more wishes. You only get three. Next, can’t kill anyone so if you’re looking to make someone croak” at this the girl transformed into a hopping pink frog croaking,  “I cant do it so don’t ask.” 

Jordan popped back to human form, “I can’t make people fall in love either but I don’t think we have to worry about that yet.” 

“Girls have cooties,” Malik wrinkled his nose, “And they are unholy temptresses that lower weak men to the fires of hell.” 

Jordan’s jaw dropped at Malik’s innocent voice proclaiming such a bold, sexist statement. 

Jade hurriedly covered his mouth before he could continue repeating the things he heard at night, “He lived next door to Frollo.” 

Jordan’s tight smile stiffened, “Charming. So what would you like?”

“You’re not going to trick him right?” Jade jumped in, a sudden fear entering her mind as she remembered the stories.

“Of course not! He’s a child.” Jordan said defensively.

“So? I’m the child of Nasira and you Auradonians are fine with leaving me here to live with her.” Jade pointed out. “I had nothing to do with that. I’m trying to rescue all of you from the Coven and change things a bit.” Jordan said.

“You still-”

“How about you don’t judge me for the mistakes of the adults in my life and I won’t judge you for the mistakes of Nasira and Mozonroth and the others.” Jordan suggested, and turned her attention to Malik, “What would you like?”

“Candy! Unlimited supply of candy!” Malik said.

“Hmm that’s nice but wouldn’t you prefer an unlimited supply of food?” Jordan suggested.

“I want candy.” Malik insisted.

“Food includes candy.” Jordan said.

“You sure?” Malik eyed her suspiciously.

Jordan gave him a genuine smile, and Jade shook her head in amusement. Why were kids so cute like this? He’d be an excellent manipulator when he got older with those big brown eyes of his. People would want to give him stuff.

“Let me think, let me think. How did Mom do this with Dhandi? Oh right. Malik, repeat after me. I wish…”  

“I wish,” Malik repeated slowly.

“To have an unlimited supply of food and never go hungry again!”

“To have an unlimited supply of food and never go hungry again!”

“Done!” Jordan snapped her fingers and a giant fridge dropped in from one where the door burst open with the sweet smell of fresh fruits, vegetables and yes, several tubs of ice cream.

“Is that cotton candy ice cream?” Jade gasped, her mouth already watering at the sight of Malik digging in. She hesitated for a moment before diving in herself, she deserved it after her panic attack earlier.

“When I deliver, I deliver.” Jordan flipped her ponytail.

Jade ripped the lid off and savored the cold sweetness. It stung her tongue with its freezing temperature but it was so refreshing and delicious she ate through the pain.

“Oo oo can I ush mugh wishto fly?” Malik asked with his mouth full and ice cream dripping down his chin.

“Yes, whatever you want. Just swallow the food first.” Jordan told him.

“I wish I could fly!” Malik commanded.

“A little faith, trust and some pixie dust.” Jordan clapped her hands letting the boy float up and start doing somersaults in the air, nearly crashing into the ceiling.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea to grant his wish to um” Jade paused to swallow past a large lump of ice cream and began to hack.

“Oh it’s fine. He didn’t wish to fly forever. He’ll come down in an hour.” Jordan waved off her concerns and patted her on the back till she got the food down. “He’s so sweet. It’s amazing how you all are related.”

Hmm so much for no judging based on the sins of their relatives.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Jade asked with a false sweetness, scooping another piece of ice cream that trickled down her fingers.

“Oh you know. Antiqam’s a monster. Malik is such an adorable sweetie. You’re...uh I’m sure you’re a nice person. I mean you saved Aziz so..thank you.”

Jade was taken aback by the thankfulness in Jordan’s voice. She had never been thanked before. Not that she remembered. And the sincere meaning held into that one “thank you,” it gave her a warm feeling inside. For a brief moment, she thought if she didn’t gain anything from helping Aziz, she wouldn’t mind. That thank you would be enough.

Heh maybe that’s why Auradonians did good deeds like this all the time? It felt good.

But not as good as the ice cream. On second thought, she wouldn’t be able to live on “thank you”s alone. She wanted the other perks too.

“And Jay’s..Jay’s himself.” Jordan finished lamely.

“Himself? That’s not an answer. What are you holding back?” Jade questioned.

Jordan sighed, “He’s a jerk.”

“He saved Auradon! Twice!”

“Still a jerk. So greedy and self absorbed and a kleptomaniac. He acts too much like his father for my taste.”

“So? You can’t expect him to throw off years of habits just because he lives in Auradon now. He’s saved your kingdom and he’s trying to be good. Is that not enough for you people?” Jade retorted, feeling a deep need to defend her cousin.

What did she know? She was an all powerful genie, she never wanted for anything. She lived with the good guys who never hit her. She never had to scavenge for food or try to survive winter with only the scraps of clothes that she had since she was 8.

“I’m just saying. Carlos grew up on the Isle and he’s incredibly sweet. He’s not into all the fighting and lies like he breathes.” Jordan snorted.  

“You’re right, Carlos didn’t really know how to fight and because of that, he got abused by Cruella.” Jade shot back, “If Jay acted like a goody goody all the time how do you think Jafar would react? He was already disappointed enough by Jay when he lived here because he couldn’t get that “big score.” Don’t judge him, you hardly know him.”  

“Fine, you have a point. But still, just because he’s back on the Isle, it doesn’t mean he has to revert back to it. He doesn’t have to use people anymore. And lie and make false promises about wish.. I-I mean. May-maybe just think about others besides himself.” Jordan ranted.

“He cares about others! Have you’ve seen how protective and caring he is of his friends?”

“But what about you? You’re his cousin, and he never talks about you. I didn’t even know you existed until we came here. Some caring guy.” Jordan said sarcastically.

“That’s not- that’s not his fault. He would if I let him care about him but..” Jade shrugged feeling a foolish emotional lump gather in her front.

Not again! She wasn’t going to cry twice in one day.

Jade frantically blinked back her tears, “I pushed him away because.. because… We’re better on our own. Lone wolf, all that. You wouldn’t understand. It’s a family thing.”

“You really care about him even though he acted like he forgot about you?”

“It doesn’t matter. He’s my cousin and I care about him enough that I don’t want to see him hurt or used. And I know that even though we don’t spend much time together, he would still do the same for me. He has a family honor that you don’t see. And if he chooses to care about you, there is no other big brother figure you’d want by your side.”

Jordan stared at her curiously but the look in her eye showed that she believed her. “Wow.”

“Yeah well. It’s true.” Jade crossed her arms defensively.

What was with her today? Two emotional speeches unleashing her own baggage in one day.

“Would you say Jay is like your platonic soulmate? Like if you could trust one person, he’d be that person you’d put your trust and well being in? While having the most fun ever?”

It was a weird question but all it took was Jade to look at Jay’s hypnotized face, even though she never let him protect her like a big brother would, she still trusted him to have her back in other ways. He still acted like a big brother of sorts when they did hang out. He inspired her to be more fearless in an effort to keep up with his impulsive activity. Though he didn’t mean to, he comforted her after a bad day by helping her forget.

One particularly good memory she had was Jay’s 13 birthday. Jay never favored one of those lavish parties the other kids had who had delusions of retaining their semi-royal status like Evie or Anthony Tremine. He just spent the day getting into mischief. He bumped into her and she joined him celebrating his day by scavenging Madame Medusa’s pawn shop and then ending it with getting lower back tattoos. He got a striking cobra and hers was a coiled viper.

She had to pay for impulsive her decision when she got home. Her mom hated that tattoo. She thought it was vulgar and unbecoming for her child but Jade felt it was worth it anyway. She was her own person, she wanted a tattoo, and because Jay had a similar one, she felt it immortalized their relationship. Two different snakes form the same family.

So yeah, she trusted him, and she loved raising hell with him. On a way he was her first real friend before Yzla came along. He was her platonic soulmate if that’s what it meant. Only in a lot less sappy way.

Smiling at the memory Jade came back to earth and saw Jordan smiling way too happily for her taste.

“What? Do I have ice cream in my teeth?”

“No, you don’t have to say a word, your face answered my question. Let me handle this.”

Jade let the genie girl do her thing because honestly she didn’t know what it was.

Jordan pulled some sort of invisible string that brought Malik down from flying around and making parrot noises.

“Hey, know what would be a fun third wish?” Jordan clapped her hands excitedly, “For your third wish, let’s make Jay fun again. This Jay is boring right?”

“Yes,” Malik nodded sagely, “He’s very boring. He hasn’t said a word in three days and follows others around like the dog he is.”

Jade and Jordan looked at Malik curiously which Malik shrugged innocently, “That’s what Antiqam said.”

“He’s such an asshole,” Jade muttered.

“Alright, so repeat after me, I wish for Jay to be unhypnotized.” Jordan held his hands intently and Malik nodded in agreement, obediently repeating, “I wish for Jay to be unhypnotized.”

“You could have unhypnotized Jay this whole time?” Jade cried under her breath as Jordan settled into a lotus position.

“No. One, I’ve been under Antiqam’s care until now so I haven’t had time. Two, even if I wanted to, I couldn’t. I’m a genie. People can do whatever they want from me. But I can’t transform a human or hypnotize him or manipulate him in any way unless he is in my lamp or if he wishes for it. It’s a shitty universal double standard. But now I can since Malik wished it. So shush. I haven’t done a big wish like this before so I need to concentrate.”

Jade stood back with Malik gripping her leg to keep from floating up again, waiting awkwardly for something to happen while Jordan seemed to do some sort of weird yoga breathing as smoke grew taller and taller around her.

“Is Jay unhypnotized yet?” Malik whispered, “Shhhhh.”

The smoke began to build and so did the humidity in the room making Jade’s hair plastered to her face and sweat drip down uncomfortable places on her skin, and she was beginning to feel faint.

Then all at once the heat of the room whooshed out of the room and the smoke cleared.

Jay was swaying uneasily, holding a hand to his head, “Wha? What happened?”

“Jay!” Malik flew to Jay knocking him against the wall much to the teen’s confusion.

Jade felt a wide smile spreading across her face, and she didn’t care at all about her reputation and her promise not to be too friendly with Jay for fear of her mom’s wrath.

Things were changing, and she wasn’t going to wait any until they defeated the Coven to start openly disobeying her mom. She would do it now, and if she got caught and her mom wanted to hit her, she’d figure out a way to get out of it. That’s what she did.

For now, she was going to allow herself to be hugged for once, and enjoy the safety that was Jay and his protective instincts.

“Welcome back to the land of the living, Jayal.”

[zhimaqiu]

3: crush?

Real people:

There is thst one boy in my school... I like his appearance and behaviour but because we rarely talk or even see eachother (then our contact is literally just waving, sometimes we work together as volunteers at our school stable) because of amount of lessons. It's probably my first crush in a whole life and I have no idea what to do with this. To be honest, I'm forbidding myself even thinking about such things because falling in love from the first sight (because that's what happened) isn't right and it's colliding with my sense of logical thinking

I had some crushes before but because of this thinking I used to calm down after a month at best.

Fictional characters:

And here's the funny thing. When I'm so freaking strict with my feelings in real life, I'm totally wild when it comes to fictional (and that one historical marshal of Napoleon *cough*) characters. Maybe that's why I don't look for love in rl? Maybe I use all my love amount on them and my friends? Idk. But I love too many to even list all.

But rn I'm SCREAMING over Marshal Jean Lannes (I'm in love in his behaviour and dumbass energy) and le Comte de Saint-Germain (from Ikemen Vampire, on the pic below). I probably have some historical figure kink lol.

St. Germain is actually based by a real person who "had incredibly long lifespan and keep looking like 40 years old man" and traveled through time. Much more interesting vampiric stuff than some noob like count Dracula haha

Oh my, now I again feel that strange warmth in my chest when I'm looking at him AAAAAAAAAA

Heck I'm rambling

[mythgenderedloki]

War of the realms spoilers!!!

Okay so i know no one cares but this is my prediction for the new loki comic series....

Right. So loki is dead accept that he's not. He's currently being digested in Laufey's stomach (ew) but he's still alive cus he's loki. He must somehow escape from the tummy prison he's in one way or another. And what's all this talk about new responsibilities?! Here's my dumb theory that's definitely not going to happen :

In the cover of loki #1 we see loki wielding mjolnir which leads many people to theories maybe loki becomes worthy of mjolnir. Although most comic covers are nevee thst literal and loki with mjolnir could be just an eye catching, comic selling image, i think tjis could be possible. Throughout the build up to war of the realms loki seemed to be one of the few characters that was trying to warn everyone about the up coming warn; he tells Dr Strange about it and tries to get Jane Foster's Thor to help him try to prevent it. This doesn't work because no one trusts loki and then there's the whole stabbing Frigga issue.

However, it is this which gives loki the most cause to be worthy. He stabs frigga to save her. Loki explains many times that Malekith was going to kill her so by almost killing frigga, loki prevents this. Yet it is not loki's cunning plan that makes him worthy, but his sacrifice. Loki loves frigga more than anything, despite what she does to him in agent of asgard with bringing king loki back to the past. She's the only one who trusts him and loki is willing to destroy this trust to save her. He sacrifices the only positive relationship in his life to protect the realms. He knows that only frigga can prevent Malekith's war of terror and he know the only way to save frigga is to sacrifice his only source if happiness.

Speaking if sacrifice, there's no greater sacrifice than letting your abusive father eat you. This is the only way he can restore the trust of frigga he was forced to sacrifice. He is willing to lay down his life to insure he's believed. Once again, loki puts the realms before his own life, sacrificing his own life to make sure thor is rescued and the realms are saved.

So this along with all the good he did in Dr Strange as the new sorcerer supreme and preventing gamora from destroying the universe with the infinity stones and helping out wolverine in Infinity watch, makes loki worthy. This is all might just be academic since mjolnir was destroyed in the sun, thanks for that Jane Foster. However, thor was trying to find he lost hammer, implying that mjolnir may still exist.

Now, finally, onto my theory. I think that loki may have an epiphany of his worthiness, summon mjolnir and free himself from Laufey's stomach. Thus loki's new responsibility would be mjolnir.

But that's not all! Laufey may be tough but he's not mjolnir-through-the-stomach tough. By killing Laufey, loki becomes the next in line to rule Jotunhiem. Furthermore, killing the previous king seems to be the most respected way to become king. Remember when laufey told loki he wasn't so much angry about loki killing him previously, as much as loki not doing so to take the throne.

This would explain why the preview to issue 2 of the new loki comic calls Stark the King if Midgard and this is why loki seeks him out: he wants some advice king to king. Also, it's just loki's luck to be 'rewarded' with kingship of Jotunhiem. Sort of a 'thanks for saving us all from the war of the realms, now you can rule the frozen wasteland of Jotunhiem you've been stuck in the past year and you can rule all those giants that want you dead and definitely won't listen to anything you say because you're too short! ' loki's current vibe has been one that involves him sauntering around the universe, causing trouble and he's gonna hate having to rule a realm that has been the source of most of his pain.

Just imagine loki doing everything he can not to be king and thor constantly dragging him back to Jotunhiem to make sure he rules them.

Thor, dragging loki by his ear into Jotunhiem: you wanted to be a king and now you are.

Loki: yeah king of asgard, not Jotunhiem, they don't even have WiFi!

Thor: doesn't matter.

Loki: they thought daft punk was a kind of ale!

Thor: welcome to your king your majesty!

Loki: THOR!

Thor, leaving through the bifrost: long may you reign!

So, that's my theory. Sorry for the long read.

[oneofakindkate-blog]

friends.

what is friendship? don’t ask me, i wanna know it too. but today’s topic is friends. if you ask me ‘do you have friends, i’ll say yes. i have one real friend. hear? i said REAL. because sometime’s people around you, your people, people you love is not your friends. trust me. i know it.

Some people talk and talk and never say a thing. Some people look at you and birds begin to sing. Some people laugh and laugh and yet you want to cry. Some people touch your hand and music fills the sky.

~ Charlotte Zolotow

my best friend’s name is ksenia. but i call her just ksesha. i love her. she is my life. ♡♡♡♡

how we met. i meet her at the bus stop. we were a little kids. maybe 4-5 years old. but i remember. it’s the best event in my life. our moms wanted to take us to kindergarten. i saw her. we just ran around the stop until she fell. she started to cry. moms couldn’t understand why. we went to the same kindergarden but we didn’t talk. i just saw her sometimes. and i often met her at the bus stop. but i was scared to talk to her.

how we became friends. one day i decided to talk to her. and she too. she was so nice to me. and she invited me to her house on easter. i was so glad. i just wake up at 6 o’clock a.m. and went to her. i didn’t say my parents, cause they were sleeping that time. i wrote a note. ksesha’s mom was so surprised, then i came to their house. now i understand (hah), then little kid comes to someone’s house at 7 a.m is very strange. so, anyway, i had a good day. we were plaing games all the day. it was easter. best easter in my life. but then my dad came and took me. parents were so angry and i was punished. but anyway, i’ll never forget that day. it was something new.it changed my life.

childhood. we were crazy. we playd games. we cooked. i rememder, then we cooked our first cake. my pan was hopelessly killed. but it was so tasty.  we made clips. once we turned on the music and danced to the camera to the song tik-tok (kesha). it was unforgetful. we swаm. we shared secrets. we talk about boys and clothers. and magazines. and we made a beauty salon. we did make-up with the help of children's cosmetics. we selebrated birthdays together. we watched winx and played with dolls. we rode bikes. we took pictures. i can list it endlessly. of course we quarel from time to time. once i broke her origami. i'm so ashamed of that. i’m so sorry..once she called me “stubborn ass”..but we always put up. yeah, it was a good time.

secondary school. hard times became. she was a straight-a student at school. she always got good marks. she sang. she was a beautigul girl. and me..i was not wery beautiful and my marks..it was not very geat. and our parents said we had bad influence on each other. they said we shouldn’t be friends. once i came to her, and her dog tryed to eat the window, because i was at home. we didn’t like each other, even now. that’s the reason why ksesha’s parents forbade me to come to her. and there was so many people, who tryed to destroy our friednship. she even lived in another city some time. but then she came back. we stayed together. it saved us.

high school. ok, all of us know this terrible word. hormones. when you’re are teen it’s a hard time. you think, that you’re alone and no one understands you. it was hard time for me. at that time she entered the cadet school. and i was so proud of her. it was the time i understand how much she means for me. i was never jealous of her. i've always been proud of her. and she lived our village. she is studing there now. she went home some weekends. but we communicate on the Internet. and no one has canceled summer vacation. i don’t wanna she come back. cause i really wish the best for her. if she only know, she is amazing. thst time i became a strait-a student and..

now. this summer i entered the university. she is still studying at cadet school. and something happend. autumn 2018 i was depressed. i cryed almost every day. i thought ksesha is one thing, that i have. but in december she just stop our comunication. i couldn’t understand why. we didn’t quarell. i thought everything was good. it almost killed me. i cryed so much. too much. i tryed to talk to her. finally, one day she said sorry. she just thought our comunication is not our past comunication. but it never will be past comunication anymore. we are growing up.

  and i know you’re reading it right now. i know world can hurt you. but i never. you’re a person, who make me feel better. you are my person, i never wanna let you go. if you’re reading in now - i love you. if you read it in a year- i love you. if you read at 50 years old - i love you. i will always love you. i will love you no matter what happens. i love you. forever. stay.

love, kate. ❤

[darksydebryde]

Apparently a cartoon mouse named Speedy and a cartoon skunk named Le Pew are the latest on the woke mobs hit list along with large hoop earrings. Who is the one with the final say on what it is we are supposed to like and not like? Is there a group that meets on the first Tuesday of the month and votes?

What kind of life do you have that makes it possible to sit around and choose what people should hate this week? Is laughing against the rules? Do you have a leader and if so does this person have an education? Have we really reached a point in society where if one person is offended then it must be destroyed?

I sincerely hope not.

"But you can't make people listen. They have to come round in their own time, wondering what happened and why the world blew up around them. It can't last." Ray Bradbury-- Ferenheight 451

Cancel culture makes me want to scream. I saw a post on FB about a book burning party and it made me freeze up. In the span of a few seconds the myriad of paths that can be taken from that single instant scared the helloutta me. Banning, canceling and burning books, characters, shows because it doesn't measure up to some odd scale of societal niceties is wrong. A good book will make you laugh, cry and think. The words will dig under your skin and roam around your mind like a small echo until it literally changes you. From that you grow in a new understanding of life. If we continue to allow the world of cancel culture to make decisions for us then we not only lose our individuality we lose our ability to think for ourselves.

To echo something because of a hashtag does a disservice to the free thinking person. (I find a little irony in that last statement because I use hashtags at the end of posts. Lol)

I have never been a pro-cancel person. I think it leads us down a slippery slope filled with ignorance. I look around and see people calling for segregation and am blown away because I honestly don't think these people understand what they are asking for. Then I read things where if you are white you are automatically racist and I feel furious at these statements because they ARE racist. And yet I don't want a single one of them canceled or taken down. Why? Because as wrong as those statements are, nobody will grow and learn how wrong they are if they do not exist. In order to stand for something you must be willing to take the good with the bad. I am a HUGE believer in FREEDOM OF SPEECH. Thst freedom comes with idiotic thinking, immoral views and strange requests. But it also comes with a long history of free thinkers that have made this world a better place. Through free speech we have the Constitution of the United States; innovation, the ability to assist one another in times of need and the gift of the written word. Freedom of speech is the foundation of all change in life. If we do not have the ability to explore or invent, then we are no longer free.

There are those who think the world would be a better place if we just get rid of everything that offends. To me, that would take away the very reasons we are here. It would take away the ability to grow past our own understandings in life.

That's about all I have right now. Time to add my own echo chamber hashtags that might light up the internet.

#wokemob #cancelculture #SpeedyGonzolas #freespeech #life #livelaughlove

[graygublerreid]

Knife

🌼REQUESTED! I HOPE YOU WILL LIKE IT🌼

CRIMINAL MINDS; SPENCER REID X READER

Prompt: the reader is paranoid and Spencer finds out.

@overcastmisfitkid

~~~~~~~~~~

Since the beginning, the team had wondered why you were so… strange? You were a lovely person, but sometimes you acted differently from other people. For example, when Spencer found a knife under your pillow.

He was at your’s because that day you were sad, so you asked him to have dinner with you, just not to be alone. You two were talking in the kitchen, where of course you were cooking pasta. In the kitchen there was at least 20 knives, but some of them were in every room of the apartment. Even one in your bed. No one knew about it, but you felt safe.

Spencer started to notice your restlessness when, during the dinner you started to look at points of the house where the light was off.

“Are you ok, (y/n)?”

“I don’t like when lights are of…”

“Are you scared of the dark?”

“Sort of.”

You were scared that someone would jump out of the dark and hurt you, even kill you. You didn’t like ‘not to see’.

You finally finished to eat. Spencer had noticed thst something was wrong with you, but he didn’t want to annoy you asking.

“Spencer, before you go, do you want to watch television?”

“Ok…”

You heard hesitation in his voice.

“If you don’t want to, it’s ok with me.”

“No, I want to! Seriously. It is just I know there is something wrong, so…”

You told him everything was good and he pretended to believe you.

“Seriously Spence, I am ok.” you stopped for a moment for then change the talk “Can you just go to my bedroom and take my sweater, please? It is over my bed.”

“Sure.”

But over the bed Spencer found something else.

“(y/n), what’s that?”

Now he was standing in front of you, in the living room, a knife in his hand.

“What a stupid question Spencer! Then why did you rummage through my things?!”

“Because I couldn’t find your damn sweater so I checked under the pillow. And guess what, I found this. Let me see your arms.”

“My arms?”

“You have a fucking knife under your pillow. Do you cut yourself?”

Spencer’s voice was loud, but not because he was angry, but because he was scared.

“I don’t cut myself.” you said showing him your clean arms.

“Then why do you have it there?”

You explained him thst you were paranoid. You were scared even of your shadow.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was scared that you could treat as a stupid.”

“Stupid? Never. A lot of people have paranoia, it’s normal. It doesn’t change the fact that you are the most important person of my life and I will always be by your side to help and calm you, ok?”

[anastycrimeboy]

Honestly, not much of someone who post anything but I feel like I wanted to talk aloud to the world anoynomously and on a format noone would likely look at so eh. Anyways I met you in 7th grade for the first time. Me? I was quite frankly just an antisocial prick. We talked truly for the first time I believe in social studies where you refered to me as "turtle boy" because of the way I sat (think somewhat like L from death note) we had a group assignment, something minor. I remember reading some question outloud I think, misspoke something aloud and had said "Saint Texas" I have no idea why it was so funny at the time but I remember it being one of the inciting incidences of our friendship. At first, I acted quite cold and annoyed towards you and your friend. You two, however, were quite subborn on making me your friend. Something I am quite honestly very greatful for, as i have no doubt my life would be very different had you two not done so. So we became friends. True friends. The closest and best two friends ive ever had the experiance of having. I dont remember much more of consequence happening in our relationships development during 7th grade. Eventually 8th grade rolled around and what a year that was, for both of us, and our mutual friend as well. You and your friend had a tough, depressing year. By December, so had I become immersed within the pit of depression. However when thinking back, I see that maybe that wasnt such a horrible thing. Our mutal suffering had brought us closer together in some ways. We shared thoughts, emotions, memories, things that brought us closer together. At some point through this, I had begun to have feelings for you. I remember vividly how happy I was when we would stay up until 3 A.M talking nonstop about anything. How happy it made me to simply sit there for hours and talk to you and see your beautiful face and hear your wonderful voice, laughter... I knew how I felt about you. I didnt tell you how I felt for a while. Eventually you had gotten with a guy, actually a friend of mine at the time. Man was I jealous of him... He got your first kiss, was I believe your first boyfriend to my knowlege. He got to hold you, cuddle with you, kiss you, be with you in a way I felt I probably never would. Ha, hell how right I was. You were with him for some time. Through this we continued our close relationship, talked for hours, just enjoyed eachothers presence, at least I know I did. I know at some point while you were with him, believe it was around Christmas, I had told you that I liked you. Not in the manner of just being friends but in a romantic manner. Pretty stupid looking bad, who tells someone they like them when they have a boyfriend? It didnt change anything really, you had expressed that that would not happen then at least. You let me off easy when I had told you then, said perhaps someday. I truly took that to heart. Looking bad, I probably shouldnt have haha. Things were awkward for a week or so but things got back to normal between us soon enough, no damage done. I remember being very very envious of your boyfriend, man jealously is such a powerful emotion. Somewhere around Feburary I remember you and him had broken up for good. As bad as it sounds I remember being trilled that had happend, in spite of your obvious greif and pain at the failure of a long term relationship. To be fair, I was young. I didnt truly understand what love was then. More than likely, then what I had felt for you was nothing more than simple infatuation. Although at the same time it was more than that, i cared for you deeply, and honestly, as we both recognize now the guy was a total asshole. So i like to justify that thats part of what I was so thrilled about but I couldnt say for certain. At this point, both our states of mental health were pretty piss poor. Both of us very depressed people, something that had only gotten worse for us both over the year. You became... this bright sun in my everyday life. The one person who would always bring a smile to my face everytime I simply laid eyes upon you. Without you, I felt hallow, and with you I felt like the sun was shinning on my skin on a spring day. I knew full well you didnt feel the same way about me. Deep down I knew you never would truly feel the same way. However I held some feable hope thst maybe, just maybe one day you'd love me like I grew to love you. Sometime around april, or may you and your friend were just about healed from this depression we had suffered, and I had stagnated. Looking bad, im sure that was mostly due to one crucial fact: you two were bound to go to one high school, and me, another. I knew I was losing two people who.... quite frankly were closer to me than my family ever was, even including my beloved deceased father. I remember on the last day of school crying a bloody waterfall. I never conciously thought this at the time, but im sure in my heart I knew: this would cement that our relationship would only go downhill in terms of our closeness, there was no alternative. You see i neglected to mention, we had experianced a bit of a falling out a month and a half before graduation relating to my depression and extreme drug use. You guys eventually so fed up with it you stopped talking to me altogether. This had forced me to stop abusing oxycotten, and in doing so, you accepted me once more as your friend a week or two before school ended. Our other friend however, from this point forward, was no longer a friend of mine. And my fallout with her was permanent. This left me with you as literally my only true close friend. And man the thought of losing you too then was just... Unfathomable. During the summer I recall talking to you somewhat frequently for a month or so. Then, there was a point when I had for some stupid reason, talked about my issues with your sister. God knows why, i sure dont know what the hell i was thinking haha. This led to you being quite rightly pissed, essentially telling me that you were done talking to me until I got my head straight and out of my shithole of a depression. Quite frankly looking back, man was you not talking to me a great motivator. First it got me to stop doing hard drugs, then got me to actually really start to work on changing my mental outlook on life. By the end of the summer we were talking again, friends once more. Perhaps not as close as I wished but thats not suprising. Id be lieing I said I was totally better. That wouldnt happen until February of next year. But I was definetly in a better state than the end of 8th grade. School started, and man did I hate it. I never realized that truthfully, the only reason I could stand school so much was because of how happy seeing you made me. At this time in my life, I had no real self-confidence. I was a smart kid, my techers knew this, my mom knew it, but damn my grades sure as hell didnt reflect it. I hated school so much without you, i skipped probably more than 30 days and walked home in the first semester. We talked, texted. But man did I miss you... I only saw you once that year, during thanksgiving break. That was by far the most fun I have ever had before. We didnt do anything crazy. We just went out, had got orange leaf, went to barns and nobles and got coffee, you dragged into bath and bodyworks.. Haha man I think that was, what? The second? Third time just you and me hung out by ourselves in peron? I remember never wanting that day to end. I remember thinking 'what if everyday could be like this?' My love for you only grew as time went on it seemed. Distance has never dulled my love for you in the slightest. Time went on. By Feburary my mom was getting desperate reguarding my depression and alarming rate of skipping school, so she took me out and placed me in a charter school, self paced, self taught. A place I could avoid everyone and just learn. Did wonders for my confidence and my mental health. Since then ive been just fine, had a great outlook on life. Great work ethic. You were always there, cheering me on as I got better and worked harder. Haha I remember we flirted a little toward the end of that you. You teased me quite often texting me on my phone you little minx hahaha. Ah, yeah that had sent me some mixed singals alright. Our relationship was still quite solid. We were close, had grown up quite a bit for the year before... things seemed good. Summer once again rolled around, we hung out on my birthday. That alone made it my favorite birthday I've had to date. We had gone to the movies, and just went back to my house, smoked a bowl or two, and relaxed and watch some Star Wars. Enjoyed our time together. I remember multiple times wanting nothing more than to get closer to you and just hold you in my arms... Eventually you left. Once again, I couldnt help but feel that strange hallowness I experiance without you. Wishing I was brave enough to try to hold you, kiss you. Summer went by. We kept somewhat in touch. The next year, 10th grade, is when I would say we truly started to experiance an increase in the gap between us. We talked yes, occassionally discussing what was going on in eachother lives. By this point, and this point onward I dont think we ever shared another long conversaion. Never since then have we had one of those wonderful nights we would just stay up and just talk and enjoy the others presence... Nope. Those times seemed to have passed. I tried on occasion to start one of those kinds conversations, but something would always come up, or one of your sisters would interupt is and eventually i'd just let you go as we were no longer talking, ect. I think i may have seen you once that year. I dont truly remember it if we did. That year went by quickly. We kept in touch of course. We would always talk about how much we missed eachother ha... I just worked hard that year. Nothing else to do really. I've always been a bit of a loner socially and dont bother making friends. Did quite well, ended up both my softmore and junior year, and became a senior. You were quite proud of me I remember. Once again, I got to see you on my birthday and, well, it was then I think I really noticed the deaph of how much we had spaced apart. We just kinda watched a movie for a few hours and you left after a while. I remember being nervous the whole time. We hadnt seen eachother in so long I wasnt sure how to act. I still loved you, just as much as ever, but for fucks sake I didn't for the life of me know what to say, what to do, how to act. I didn't really know what to do around you anymore. By then... We seldomly saw eachother over the course two years, hardly spoke the year before. We didnt have recent experiances, or interesting things to talk about. Well I mean at least I didn't. As a bit of a loner all I had to discuss was my acedemic acheivement and video games or music. Im sure you had stuff going on in your life but by then... Im pretty sure we had seperated to a degree where you didn't even know where to begin discussing what was going on with you, nor did I know the questions to ask. So yeah that was awkward. And I remember kicking myself again and again over it. Same thing happened in augest when I went to your house before school started.... Sigh I remember thoughout these years you've had a few boyfriends, by the middle of freshman year I had a much better grasp on the true meaning of love: that when you love someone, you put their needs, their wants, and their happiness before yours. So I was okay with it. I let go of jealousy. What replaced it was this heart wrenching, smoach dropping sadness when you were with someone else. But again, I knew that you'd never truly loved me in the romantic sense, just as friends really. I knew this spite of the fact you had told me otherwise multiple times. I know you were just reassuring me to spare my feelings. And in a way, i thank you for that. Hell at times, I even let myself believe it. But I was somewhat hopeful, some peice of me remained stubborn that one day you just might like me even slightly in a romantic manner. Hell im graduating now, and I still have not dated, kissed, loved, or truly considered being with another girl. Ive always hoped you would be my first everything. My first kiss, first girlfriend, first date. Hell one day I hoped youd be my first and only wife... we'd have a beautiful little girl... Sigh. Just dreams I suppose. Then this year cam along. Things only got worse. We've hardly talked. I mean sure ill text you general well wishes most mornings when I can and have said more "I love yous" than one could probably count but really? Thats about it. Weve met up twice this year for lunch but i feel like the damage has been done already. Yes yes we have seen eachother but you know I find it hasnt actually alleaviated my missing you. Its like... Idk I see you but at the same time I didnt. Both times we just talked about old friends, school, advancements in life. Nothing really significant or personal... Only had two, somewhat awkward, hugs with you this year. When, bloody hell, ive always wanted so much more than that. Now... The year is ending and really I recognize that we are honestly little more than acquaintances. I mean yes we know eachothers history, but bloody hell we hardly talk anymore about anything. We have no idea what the eachothers life is like... Well okay you know what mine is like due to how honestly shallow it is but I hardly know how yours is going. And quite frankly i dont know the questions to ask or the things to say to find out.... I just wish we were as close as we once were... Gods how id give almost anything just to be close friends again, romanctic thoughts aside. Now I see that our drift is just... This gaping raveen the size of the great cayon. And I know its only bound to get worse and eventually end altogether... With me going to college and you your own way with withever you decide to do, likely traveling with your beautiful, adventurous soul. I hope our paths interwine once more in the future... Odds are they wont but I mean you never know what God holds in store for us yeah? Ill always regret not getting the chance to experiance something more with you. Never really trying my hand at something more truly. I was a coward. Quite honestly in some ways though, im glad. You really deserve someone much better than I am. Someone who can make you happy, laugh, and feel joy every minute your with them like you have made me feel. Comfort you when you need help, be there for you when your in pain. These are things I've tried hard to do for you, but could never do perfectly. I really hope you meet a man who can do those things for you. You deserve it more than anyone else. Looking back, I can see that I was lucky that I even ever got to call you a friend. And I was smiled upon by god by the fact that you love(ed) me as a friend. That alone was really more than I had the right to ask for really. Thank you, for everything you have done for me. And helping me become who I am today. I only wish I could have helped you half as much as you have me... I love you, forever and always. And may god bless your life and the path you walk on my love.