#and learning the lyrics and all of the extra stuff

[skiiyoomin]

HII!! Idk if your taking requests rn but if you still do,can you please do Bakugou having a emo gf?? I honestly don't know if you still write mha stuffs, so ignore this if you don't!! 🙏🙏

ღBakugou having an emo gf

ʚCont: Swearing, fem! reader

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a/n hi!! idk if you wanted it to be texts or a oneshots or wtv so i went with headcanons!! and yess i still write for mha, my inbox is open if you get creative ;)) also, my conception of emo might but kinda stereotypical so i apologize in advance!!

Bakugou had an emo phase in middle school and you can NAWTTT change my mind. Now that he´s older and more mature, he´s become closeted about this phase of his. But trust, if he hears any type of emo music, he knows deep down in his soul that he´s jamming to that shit.

That is why, in terms of how aggressive he is with people, emos are at the bottom of the list, including you.

Of course, when you first walked into class he was still the abrasive person he is. Nevertheless, it was clear to anyone who had known him long enough, that he treated you with just a little more respect than he did with others.

You never understood it, but you never questioned it either. What little bit of peace there was with the blonde was to remain untouched and unshattered. That is until Mina whispered ideas into your head that Bakugou had a thing for you. At first, you tried to convince yourself that it was just Mina gossiping as always. But that didn´t mean you weren´t just the slightest bit more aware of Bakugous mannerisms towards you.

During his infatuated phase, though he would rather die than call it that, he had walked past your room only to stop abruptly when the muffled music reached his ears. The rythm of Panic! At The Disco was heard through your speakers, your melodic voice humming the lyrics. He´d be lying if he said he didn´t know the songs by heart. He did.

And despite his embarrassment of people having this knowledge, his gut told him you wouldn´t judge. Hence why he found himself knocking on your door.

"Bakugou? Do you need something?" You ask, not having expected the sudden visit.

Why did he come here again? His throat suddenly felt dry and his tongue heavy.

"I heard your music down the hallway, it´s too damn loud" Smooth Bakugou smooth.

"Oh. Is it? I´ll turn it down"

Just as you turn back around, he abruptly speaks.

"I like it" Well that sounded dumb "The group I mean. It used to be my favorite"

If you weren´t surprised before you sure are now. Yet you didn´t dislike it.

"Really?....Wanna come in to listen?"

The friendship stage was blurry to say the least. Neither of you knew whether you were treading a line between friends or lovers. But it felt right.

The respect he held for you from the beginning grew the more he learned about you. Between all the dumbasses and extras he was surrounded with, you seemed to be the one with the most refreshing mind. Your passions and views about the world amaze him to no end and he finds himself learning from you.

Of course, everyone else could see the palpable tension between you. It was clear as day yet neither of you made a move. It was infuriating and your dear classmates could only take so much before they intervened. Luckily, a small push was all that was needed for things to go smoothly.

They went with the classic plan. Making plans with friends only to end up ditching you and leaving you all alone with your now crush. Bakugou caught on quicker than you did. And while he wanted to strangle the idiots, he knew it was now or never, he had to stop chickening out.

"What are we?" He asks out of the blue while walking back to the dorms. He could feel your eyes on him, but he didn´t turn his head, too scared to look.

"What do you want us to be?" You counterask, your heart inevitably thumping in your chest.

"If I tell you will you still stay?" You can only muster a nod.

"I want us to stop dancing around our feelings. I want to take you out. On a real date"

With a grin, you lean close and place a kiss to his blossoming cheek. "I´ve been waiting for you to ask"

The relationship wasn´t all that different. Rather, it was more like an upgrade. He still does the things he does but now under the claim of being your boyfriend. And yes, he came out of the emo closet, though it was pretty transparent. Don´t tell him that though.

[keesdarlin]

☆// mine, yours (MDNI 18+)

info! 141 / fluff, established relationship (sort of) + gender neutral reader

cw! implied past self hatred, negative self image, mental health recovery, healing vibes

prompt! "i wanna be mine, wanna be yours" Mine / Yours by Wilbur Soot

notes! god i'm Really trying to not make it a habit to use wilbur soot lyrics as prompts but it's hard when they're so good please forgive me. also just as a disclaimer, the whole "you have to love yourself before you can be loved by someone else" thing is bullshit. date who you want when you want. the only thing that matters is that you actually want to get there with yourself

PRICE:

honestly, john is the king of praise and reassurance. he sees how much you struggle sometimes, especially with your faith in your skills. as a solution, he finds ways to give you lots of praise for your hard work on the side. it’s hardly in front of other recruits or, god forbid, the rest of the 141 guys, but only because he doesn’t feel like getting accused of picking favorites (even though everyone already knows anyways). besides, that praise isn’t for everyone else. it’s for you. he never gives you pointers unprompted because he doesn’t want you to feel like he’s rushing you along. he tries his best to give you the room to take things at your own pace. always asks if he can give you an idea to maybe make things easier or if he should explain something in a different way. every once in a while you have a day where whatever you’re doing is just a little bit… more than usual. a little bit more difficult, taking a little bit more time, requiring a little bit more focus than you’re used to. john spends a little bit more time with you on those days, not to babysit you or coddle you, but just to make sure that you’re feeling alright about things. when you finally get it right, he can’t help but break out in a grin with a quiet, “good job, sergeant.”

GAZ:

gaz is huge on compliments. he’s always the first one to tell you how amazing you look every day. it’s easy to struggle with loving the way you look, he knows, so he does his best to try and mitigate that. don’t get him wrong; he’s not complimenting you out of obligation or pity. he compliments you because he believes it and he wants you to believe it too. will compliment anything from your makeup (if you wear any) to your outfit to your new shoes. he just thinks you’re the shit.

kyle also puts a lot of focus on acts of service. although you’re on a journey of self love and learning how to be healthily independent rather than hyper-independent, there’s a lot of skill to build in areas where it comes to when and if you should be leaning on other people. it’s hard, he knows, but he wants to help you practice! so he watches you, surprisingly in tune with your needs, and tries to meet you halfway. it’s not that he doesn’t think that you can do it yourself. in fact, he’s certain that you can. it’s more that this is his way of helping teach you that it’s alright to accept help. he doesn’t always ask first, but he’ll do a little something when he knows you’ve had a rough day. when he sees the exhaustion that hides in the way that you roll your neck, or the way that your shoulders hike up to your ears with anxiety, or the tired sigh that leaves your lips when you finally get a chance to sit down. and it’s not always something big. usually him doing your dishes ���on accident” or because he had the extra time, or making a little extra dinner for you so that you don’t have to make your own, or bringing you a glass of water even though you didn’t ask for one. he knows he doesn’t have to, he knows that you’re capable of doing all this stuff yourself, but he wants you to know that you’re not going it alone. not as long as he’s there.

SOAP:

johnny uses a lot of patience and encouragement with you, mostly in moments of frustration, and sometimes a little instruction. an aspect of the self care journey that you find yourself struggling a lot with is remembering to be patient with yourself. you can sometimes find yourself going off the rails a little bit, but soap is here to help reel you back in. without sounding patronizing, he’ll remind you to take a step back from the situation for a second, take a breath, go for a walk, whatever you need to do to zone in, and then come back after.

one day you’re down at the shooting range when the frustration hits. normally, you’re a pretty good shot, but for some reason today you can’t hit near the middle of the target for the life of you. another shot missed and you sigh sharply, barely managing to stifle the groan and curses that threaten to escape you.

“you doing alright?” soap asks from somewhere behind you.

“fine, thanks,” you mutter through clenched teeth. you don’t bother to look back at him, closing one eye as you try to focus your aim.

soap hums. steps forward, sets a gentle hand on your shoulder. you take the hint and lower your gun, huffing as you turn to look at him. “alright. you’re doing pretty well so far, but let’s take a deep breath and try it all again, aye bonnie? i’ll help.”

you roll your eyes but inhale deep anyways. soap nods as he watches your shoulders fall with the exhale. “good job, lamb. now come ‘ere. ‘m gonna help you adjust to this gun.”

GHOST:

simon doesn’t tolerate negative self-talk. you guys talked about it once, how you want to be better about being kind to yourself. sure, sometimes that can mean taking a self care day or going out for a night with some friends or sitting down and taking some time to do something intentional. but those all have the potential to be pretty time consuming. something you can do every day, all the time no matter what you might be up to is saying something nice about yourself. it’s definitely weird the first few times; you didn’t realize before how much shit you talk about yourself every day, so the new hyper-awareness is a little bit anxiety-inducing. but once you adjust to the strangeness of it, it actually starts to feel kind of nice. every time you say something kind about yourself and find yourself meaning it, a spot of pride pulses warmly in your chest. it can still be difficult sometimes. some days, when things feel a little bit darker, a little bit heavier, you find yourself insulting your mistakes and talking down to yourself. but simon is right there with you to remind you. “you wanna try that again?” he asks nonchalantly when he hears you utter a quiet ‘oof, i’m dumb.’

you blush, but nod. “yeah, sorry. uhm… i’m not dumb, i’m just distracted and i’ll do better.”

he never gives a verbal response to your self-compliments, just a nod and, if you’re lucky, a little smile.

[hithisartexists]

hi im still alive. i got back in the fnaf craze while engaging with nostalgia. heres the art ive made so far.

1. lyrics from True Romance by She Wants Revenge

2. panel redraw of the graphic novel + a closeup of the face for detail

3. college era willry of them talking about making fredbear's + extra doodle of henrys fredbear fit

4. doodles i made while reading the graphic novels

below the read more: a several paragraph long rant i went on that was just supposed to be willry timeline headcanons. oops

henry henry henry henry henry and william and henry and william and

in my hc, the timelines goes that henry and william met in college. henry was always more reasonable and personable, but he grew attached to william anyway. William, of course, was (not) very normal about this/. He starts writing about henry in his journal, (An idea from henry, actually, to start journals as a form of self therapy. He was reasonable like that.) EVentually they open up fredbears together and start families. Henry was so in love with his own family and everything was going perfectly for him. He and william were still good friends. William seemed to be a bit more distant to his own family, in fact he was never sure if he had wanted to start it in the first place. Realistically, this is never what he wanted, but he pushed those thoughts on the backburner because anything with Henry was out of the question.

This continues until the first Bite, in which the crying child, his favorite son, dies. His youngest was always his favorite because he learned quick. Evan learned from Micheal and Will's interactions not to talk or fight back or he would be in trouble. He learned from his sister not to bother dad because "kids should only speak when spoken to." He was the perfect child to William because he never got in the way or complained.

Upon Evan's death, William is devastated. And like a savior, Henry is there. Henry is there to keep him from being alone (and also to make sure he's not too cruel in Michael's punishments, deserved or not). William tries to absorb himself in his engineering to distract from the death, but it's not enough. He keeps obsessing over it while building, while doing anything, and as it keeps ramping up he keeps leaning on Henry as a crutch, but even he can't keep Will's head above water.

One day, William is brimming with rage. He runs an establishment for all these happy families, the same establishment that tore apart his own. His best friend at the center of it, never truly knowing his grief. And one day, a crime of passion inspired by rage and wanting to be recognized and selfishness over the attention of his friend, who was ready to move on before he was, led to six dead kids, most noteably Charlotte, Henry's daughter. Panic sets in midway through the murders but he knows he can't just let them go now. In a fit of terror he stuffs them in spare suits, intending to return the next day with more time and dispose of them properly. As he leaves, though, they speak. They scream and they cry and they curse and William runs back home, horrified.

Henry is devastated. His poor baby girl, missing, the one time he looks away from her. The police are searching, he and his wife are crying, and Sammy doesnt understand why his twin sister isn't coming home. He takes his first day off work in years. Upon returning, he is greeted by William. How kind of him to run the place in Henry's absence, to keep it so clean. Oh, and that paperwork that bothered him so much is finally complete. And these sweet, understanding words from somebody who truly understands his grievances, all this is all he could really hope for. Will sounded so sure of his words, "They'll find her, she can't be far," the way he spoke so matter-of-factly and allowed Henry to fall limp in his arms made it seem like maybe it would really be okay.

Days pass, it isn't okay. Weeks. Months. In the absence of Charlie, it feels like William is the only one really there for him. It isn't okay. He keeps an old doll his daughter loved with him, and in his spare time he sobs and sobs and sobs into it, filling it with deep agony that only made it harder to look at. He had begun treating it like a new daughter, going so far as to build an animatronic around the doll, something of hers that could bring her back to life. But it wasn't just Charlie in that doll anymore, it was the deep sorrow of her father that fueled the machine. After enough of this, his wife leaves him and takes Sammy with her, overwhelmed and exhausted by Henry's ever-increasing delusion.

Now he really only does have William (and his metallic simulacra of paternal love). They spend more time together, and the dream of the original Fredbear's dies out as both seem to lose interest.

William's wife leaves him at some point as well, or just disappears, his story is unclear. He claims they had a heated argument about how neglectful he was to her and his family, at which point she packed up and left. There's been no way to contact her since.

At one point, William leaves his journal out. He's left the room for a few minutes, and Henry can't help but be curious. He starts from the beginning, a wholesome and slow start where William writes in very short and objective sentences, unsure of how to utilize the journal. As time goes on he seems much more passionate and full of life, around the height of Fredbear's. By this point Henry has managed to pinpoint exactly how William had felt about him this entire time, his writing seemed so much more jovial and near childish when writing about Henry. He chose to respectfully ignore this fact for Will's sake.

On the day of the bite, the handwriting is light and unsure of itself. Most of the pages after this point seem to be tear stained and/or partially torn. It's a sad thing to read this man's grief. The writing is back to the disjointed and discordial structure from the beginning, when they first met. As the pages go on, he seems to have regained his confidence, but he's still clearly a broken man. The pages go on tangents, his writing is harsh and jagged, occasionally leaving holes in the paper. Phrases repeat themselves, words fall off the lines, and Henry's name appears a lot more than he was comfortable with before.

The day of his daughter's supposed 'disappearance.' The writing is the most loopy and inane it's been thus far, but upon decoding it, overwhelming fear floods his heart. A confession. Blatant admittance and graphic description.

Henry slams the book shut, horrified and betrayed. His friend, his closest and best friend, his only friend-- took everything from him. He took everything and gave him relief piece by piece, acting like nothing was wrong for months. Acting innocent for months while Henry sobbed and wept in his shoulders and gave him everything he had left: his mind.

Henry leaves William and cuts him off entirely. He closes himself up in his house with his craft. He still can't bring himself to turn William in. He keeps trying to build Charlie, he builds more of her and tries to perfect her so that maybe, just maybe he can keep a piece of his old life. But nothing is right still; she is made of metal and fear and anger and betrayal and she will never be his dear Charlotte. He keeps working anyway, it doesn't even seem to be about love anymore. He even neglects her, seeing her only as the versions of her he's built and discarded. Not the version she would've grown to be.

He dies in that house to the only thing he could ever trust, his metal and his hands.

(alternative ending wjere william catches henry reading the book and instead of letting him go, chooses to kidnap him and keep him all for himself :3)

and the willy does afton shit. you know the rest

ok im done

[romana-after-dark]

Room's on Fire: So Afraid

Dark!Santiago Garcia x Fem!Reader

Dark!Francisco Morales x Fem!Reader

Dark!William Miller x Fem!Reader

Dark!Benjamin Miller x Fem!Reader

Also: FishBen, and an assortment of other M/M relationships (no Millercest). Everyone is Bisexual

Series Masterlist: Main Masterlist

Spotify playlist

Summery: Madonna learns her power.

Warnings and Content:

DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT

DUB CON MOSTLY but there WILL BE NON CON. Major character deaths, forced breeding, physical abuse, brainwashing, manipulation, violence, gore, alcoholism/addiction, BIG OLE BLASPHEMY WARNING like this cult appropriates a lot of religious themes and they call reader their Madonna, Santi is called the Pope, like all that stuff. However, this is a cult so I mean. It happens. None of it are my thoughts on religion or meant to make fun of religion or demonize religious people. Disgusting views on virginity. Attempted rape outside the boys. T*m warning. Age gap. Creepy terrible men. Non-reader rape, dub con, violence. Covert incest, massive mommy issues, sexual abuse all around, past grooming by parental figure. no CSA but the victim isn't much older. some Bates Motel type shit. I cannot properly warn you for everything, without just telling the story but consider this a major warning that there are dark dark themes. No one involved here is morally clean, and who you perceive as the good guy cannot be relied on. Don't come to my story and say im romanticizing these things until at least the story ends.

Extra warnings for chapter: I dont wanna spoint things so just proceed with caution. DM me if you'd like specifics before reading. I dont think its as bad as other things but.... you'll see

3.1k words (so sorry)

Support artists, like and reblog!

BTW if you dont read the lyrics usually i feel it really hits hard this time

I been alone All the years So many ways to count the tears I never change I never will I'm so afraid the way I feel Days when the rain and the sun are gone Black as night Agony's torn at my heart too long So afraid Slip and I fall and I die. ~ Go Insane, Fleetwood Mac

“He’s fucking unraveling.”

Ben is pacing inside the sanctuary, Will leaned against the wall listening to him rant. They were waiting for the others and Madonna, having to perform a healing ritual. As far as Will could tell, she was going to be okay outside the lasting scars and the mental terror, and she was past the point of miscarrying from the incident, but the people needed assurance. They needed to feel a part of something. The doors were opened other guard had seen what had happened, and from what he and Ben had heard from the rumblings of the people, they were nervous. Unsettled.

Will had to set the course straight, concocting a story of possession and torment by demons to explain Santi’s behaviors… which of course cleared Santi of responsibility but still left Delta scarred. He continued to listen to Ben’s rants.

“He’s gonna fuck it all up. Doesn’t he know more than anyone what we’re doing here? He could have killed the savior.”

“And Madonna.” Will reminds him, but Ben turns to glare at him.

“I’m aware of that. I’m aware of how important Madonna is, you don’t think I love her too? You don’t think I’ve spend every night in her bed-”

“Next to Frankie.”

Ben stopped, stepping forward and looking like he might start a fight. He was drunk, and when Ben was drunk he was either madly horny or ripe for anger fits. Will’d seen him kill a man with his bare hands at a orgy for kissing Frankie. Orgies were orgies, but Santi kept rules around Frankie, rules that had been enforced by Ben’s rage he pushed down below his crown of sunshine on his hair.

But then Frankie opened the door.

“Hey guys.” He walked in his formal wear, and Will had to admit he understood why everyone wanted a piece of him. His eyes were bright in the yellow light.

“Where’s Madonna?” Will asks.

“She’s finishing eating, Rey’s with her. I wanted to talk to you guys alone.”

Will nods.

Ben seems frustrated, crossing his arms in that pout he likes to do. ”I don’t like her alone with him.”

“He’s her personal guard, Benjamin. We have to trust him.”

He shakes his head. “We should rotate her guard so no one gets attached. You know how she breaks down everyones walls better than anyone, Frank.” There was a bit more bite than Frankie expected after the close nights they’d been spending in each other's arms next to Madonna, but when Ben was drinking it was always a bit of a guess.

“He’s her only friend. The first friend she’s had since we decided to set her dad on fire. I think we can allow her-”

“UUUUGGGHHHHHHHHH” Ben rolls his eyes and his whole head in annoyance. “Can’t she just be friends with Iris?”

Will spoke up now. “I think you ensured that won’t happen.”

“And you ensured she can’t trust Jonah” Frankie snapped, not sure why he was defending Ben. He didn’t know he did anything half the time.

Sighing, Will scrubbed his face and then held out his hands. “Both of you relax. I’ve got it taken care of. I doubt Rey has any interest in Madonna, but considering I don’t this Iris is putting out with him, we can’t be too sure. And considering what Pope did to her, we can’t have her falling into his arms. I’ve got it.”

Frankie nodded. “Rey doesn’t have eyes for anyone but Iris.”

Ben’s drunk anger shifted to his horny drunk. “To bad Madonna doesn’t have eyes for Iris.” He looked far away, smiling, no doubt thinking of their wife fucking the pretty cook. Will couldn’t deny she was beautiful… it was a wonder she was unclaimed by the time her punishment began.

A smack from Frabkie broke Ben out of his thoughts. “Ow!”

“You’re sick, you know that?”

“I can dream!”

Will was about to shout at them all to shut up when Pope opened the door. He wore a red tunic, reminding Will of pictures he’d seen of pentecost robes from the before. Not as tight as Frankie, but Frankie gained more weight in recent years. 

“Gentlemen.” He greeted, eyes raking over Frankie’s form. “Are we ready?”

Everyone nodded, Frankie doing his best to hide the anger, the furry, the disgust he felt at Santi. He could hurt him, but how dare he hurt Madonna?

Will nodded over to the entry to the church. “Frank, Ben, start the prayers. We’ll come out in a bit when Madonna arrives.”

Pope narrowed his eyes, but told Ben and Frankie to go, watching Frankie’s ass as he walked through the curtains to the congregation. 

“You couldn’t be more obvious, you know.”

He breaks Santi out of his lustful view.

“Hm?”

“Everyone knows you want Frankie more than anything. Can’t keep your eyes off him.”

Santi attempts to brush his concerns away with a whisk of his hand. “I love all my spouses.”

“You love Frankie.”

“I love him, Ben, you, Madonna.”

“You just want the savior-”

Rushing close to Will, Santi presses his chest against his lover and whispers in a harsh tone. “The savior is a part of her!”

Will grips his tunic, keeping them pulled close as he whispers in his ear. “You need. To calm. Down. Breaking her breaks the savior. Breaking her breaks the whole community. You are losing touch with reality and if you do not get. Your shit. Together. Everything will come crumbling down.” He pulls back just far rough to meet his eye and walks forward, backing Santi up until his ass hits the slab of marble they all deflowered their wife on. A faint trace of her blood remained.

Santi was panting, chest heaving and his cock rose in his robes. “Everything I do is for our community. Who do you think got her pregnant? We’re going to save this doomed earth, we’re bring The One Mighty and Strong to earth and Divine Mother will finally let us all be happy.”

“Santi…” Will caressed Santi’s face, enjoying how easily Santi submitted. Frankie was easy. Frankie melts at the simplest touch of anyone who shows him affection. Santi only submits to him. “You need to relax. She’s pregnant, and she’ll be okay. The savior is coming. You just need to-”

“Don’t tell me what to-” He begins to snap at Will, but before he can finish he’s turned around and bent over the altar. His tunic is being pulled up, and when his hands move to stop him, they are pinned down to the cold stone. “WHat are you doing?”

Spitting on his hole, Will lines his cock up at Santi’s ass and leans in. “You hurt Madonna. You need to learn a lesson.”

*

You enter at your cue, giving Rey’s hand a squeeze before he lets go to open the door. You hated this, you hated being out in public knowing everyone knew what was done to you. Will said Pope was possessed, that he was fighting a battle with the devil, spiritual warfare and he needed prayers, he needed your strength. You had to be strong for him. You forgave your husband and felt sympathy he was in so much pain… But why do you still want to recoil when he touches you? You were sleeping in your bed again, but one always accompanied you to help if the nightmares returned…. You never slept when it was Santi’s arms around you

Francisco and Ben were leading the congregation in prayers, praying for Pope’s strength in his battle and you prayed along, Francisco getting up to walk you down to the raised area. You remember, as you always did, walking down the aisle on your wedding day, unable to bare looking at them for too long, finding solace in Jonah’s eyes… Now he was talking nonsense, and you were worried about him.

The other day, early morning, you’d slipped out of Ben’s arms to find something to eat. Baby was kicking, apparently wanting sugar and you hoped Iris wasn’t up. Things were tense between you, and you could make your own pancakes. You had, of course, thanked her profusely for caring for you when… when it happened, genuinely grateful for the care she showed you… You wanted to be her friend again, god you really did, you wanted to go back to singing with Rey and her and Jonah in the kitchen… but something in the air had shifted.

Wish granted, Iris wasn’t there. Jonah was. He was drinking coffee, PJ pants slung low on his hips… No shirt. He had a lean body even at his age, hip bones prominent below the weak elastic and a trail of hair going down-

When the floor under you squeaks, Jonah stands up fully, shuffling to move behind the kitchen table. “What are you doing here? You shouldn’t be alone…”

“Baby wants pancakes.” You rub your stomach. He’s not looking at you. You make a move to the cabinets, But Jonah cuts off your path.

“I got it, you should rest.”

Your shoulders slump. “I’m not a baby, I’m just carrying one. Let me do it.”

Jonah shakes his head. “Please, just… let me.” He gives you a small smile. “I know you’re not a kid. They should all be afraid of you, Madonna.”

He made good pancakes.

*

Will and Pope returned from their prayers in the sanctuary, Pope looking… Off. He looked ruffled, confused, his eyes a little glassy… maybe Will exercised the demon out?

Pope began his prayers. “Our beloved Madonna, Holy and Beautiful, our maternal bride, has suffered pain and scarring from the demonic attacks of the devil, we must pray for heeling over her body.”

Will’s hands reach for the back of your dress, lowering the zipper when you gasp, jolting away and turning back to him. “What are you doing?!” You whisper, eyes watering with panic. Francisco mutters Will’s name, but he ignores him, opting to pull you close. He cups your face, whispering in your ear.

“They need to see the wounds, Madonna. They need to see you’re healing, they're worried.”

“But… I don’t wanna be naked, Will.” You turn to glance at the crowd, catching Pope glare. You shiver. “There’s people here who made fun of me…”

His fingers lay your hair down. “It’s just your dress, Madonna. Don’t worry, we’re right here. Trust me.” 

Echoes of the past flitter in your head.

I’m going to touch you, just stand there and take it. Trust me.

Will unzipped your dress, the fabric pooling down around your ankles. Murmurs wave over your body, whispers from the people who loved you. Were they mocking you? Were they laughing?

Just down to her underwear, Francisco.

Your bandages were off, but the skin was marred horrifically. It was bad enough those in the back could see it spreading over your pregnant stomach. Were there jealous women in the crown? Your dorm mates that didn’t understand why you were chosen?

Will’s hands find the clasp of your bra, and you tense again. “Will?”

“Just relax, Madonna. Relax for me. Don’t worry.”

It’s just me, it’s just external, don’t worry.

When his hands went for your underwear, you didn’t protest. 

You stood naked, your scared body on display for the whole congregation.

Your husbands stood at your side, each laying a hand on your stomach as the crowd began to pray. You felt like you were being punished, humiliated. What did you do wrong? Your lip quivers, panic rising in your chest again. No, no you would not melt down here. You see a woman who was particularly nasty to you… she tried to make you eat a worm because you didn’t say hi to her when you were 10 and she was 12… You were in one of your “no talking episodes” as your dad called them, the playground was too loud, your new bra you had to wear adding a sensation to your skin you hated… she took it personal, and tormented you for the next 12 years. She was smirking. 

You feel Ben’s hand on your ass, coping a feel.

You think of Will’s lies.

You look at Santi, his eyes only on your stomach. 

You look at Francisco, not saying the prayers and looking at Be’s hand on your ass.. Did you and the baby even matter to him? Why was he so disconnected?

You didn’t feel sad anymore.

You were angry.

“Kneel.”

Your voice, while quiet, makes the four of them turn to you, surprised by you. But no one moves.

“Kneel. If you’re praying for my healing, kneel.” You don’t look at them.

Santi speaks. “We don’t kneel to you, Madonna. You kneel to us.”

Your body wants to shake, you want to fold like you do every time a boundary is crossed but you don’t. 

“I am carrying the savior. I am more important than your ego.” You say, firm in your stance and keeping your voice steady. “Pray to the divine mother to protect me, if you really want this child,” you turn to Pope. “And to forgive your sins.” You turn to Francisco now, his eyes wide with fear. “Get on your knees. I know you know how.”

There was a beat of silence, everyone waiting for Pope’s movement, you knew. Then, Francisco kneels to you. Then Will. Then Pope. Then Ben, only ever following in what the others do.

When they do, a hush falls over the crowd.

You raise your arms, shouting. “We pray for a hedge of protection around me and my child.”

A voice from the crowd shouts, “hail to the mother and the savior!”

All throughout the room, the congregation echos the sentiments, shouting your praises as the smile grew on your face. They adored you. They loved you. Standing naked wasn’t humiliating, it was power. You feel Francisco’s thumb caress over your bare skin. He smiles as he mouths ‘Hail to the mother.’

*

You were running high on the endorphins, even excited enough to ride Will’s dick despite your protruding stomach. It was an amazing high, knowing the power you held, the power to make Santiago- Pope, you mean- to make Pope kneel at your command… he owed you. He owed you this. When Will fell asleep, you were still wide awake, unable to get the giddiness out of your system… So you slip a nightie over your body, pulling panties on and sneak out of the room. Jonah had said he’d make you more pancakes tonight if you were hungry and boy, baby was hungry. Rey, as predicted, was snoring in his chair and you have to stifle a giggle as you creepy past him, bare feet light on the wood flooring. 

The kitchen was dark, no Jonah… maybe you should go get him. Turning on the kitchen lights you go to exit out the other door, the servants entrance leading to the rooms of Jonah, Iris, and the other guards, but when you did, Jonah was there.

Right away, you knew something was wrong. He wreaked of alcohol, looked like he hadn't slept in days and was piss drunk, stumbling into the kitchen so hard he crashed into you. 

“Jonah-oh- I… was gonna take you up on the pancakes…” You mutter, backing away. “But maybe I can make some for you, you seem-”

He catches your wrist.

“I don’t want pancakes.” His voice is gruffer than you ever have known it. Pressing you against the counter, he crowds you in. 

Your heart beat picks up, instincts telling you to run, run, run…. But you can’t.

“What… what are you…”

His lips brush your neck before you can blink, his movements clunky and strange. “I want you.”

You try to push him away, but he’s much stronger. “Jonah stop! You’re talking crazy, you haven't been well, please, just-” Again, you try to wiggle away but his hand grabs your waist. “Just go to bed.”

Jonah scoffs, laughing sardonically. “Just like that? I tell you I want to fuck you and you say to sleep it off? Jesus christ, do you have no survival instincts? At all?”

“Please… please stop touching me Jonah…” You want to stop feeling his breath on your skin. “I won’t tell anyone. Just stop!” The tears come, crying and scared and trying to smack his hands away desperately and still trying to push out of his grasp.

“You should be screaming, honey, what is wrong with you?” His hand grips your hip, and you need him away from your baby, now.

With a closed mouth scream, you kick his shin and the shock is enough for him to let go so you take off, but he gives chase. Once again, you are pinned to the door. You knew you could scream. You start screaming, and Rey, or Will, or any of the others will be on their way in seconds and you’d be safe… ‘’

“Why are you doing this?” You sob in his arms, his fingers entangling in your hair. He pulls on it, and you close your mouth intime to not yell.

His hand caresses down your arm, making you shiver and feel so, so sick to your stomach. “God dammit, have the broken every fucking piece of you? Is that it?” Why was he so angry at you? What did you do wrong? Did you tempt him? He hand on your waste again, he keeps almost moving it up towards your breasts or down to your ass but never going far. Jonah rests his forehead on yours. “Why won’t you SCREAM!” He shouts his last word so loud in your face, the strong smell of alcohol bursting on your skin and you shout out loud.

“BECAUSE THEY’LL KILL YOU!” Your whole body heaves, panicing and you feel you might throw up. “ThEY’LL KILL YOU AND I’LL LOSE MY DAD AGAIN!”

His face turns into something pained, and while his hand reminds gripped in your hair to keep you there, he pulls back just enough for you to see him run a hand over his wet face. Right before he slammed it through the wall. You couldn’t help it, your body forced you to scream before your mouth stopped the voice, Jonah’s fist curling tightening and pulling your hair against your scalp as you continued to shout. He continued to punch the wall next to your head.

When Will burst through the door, everything went blank. As soon as Jonah was pulled off you, your body slid down the wall where you watched Will pummel Jonah. At some point, arms were wrapped around you, but you couldn’t tell if it was Rey or Frankie. Only the smell of weed narrowed it down.

You didn’t hear much, your ears ringing as you watched blood fly out of Jonah's mouth. Muffles words weren't as loud as the beats to Jonah's body. You were sure other people were in the room... there was shouting... but you couldn't see anything except Jonah going limp, only jolting weakly at each slam of Will's fists.

You aren’t even sure how you made it back to bed.

Shout out to @hornystan for editing, our beloved Frankie in his formal wear

Okay. So that happened.

JONAH what are you DOING BESTIE??????

PLEASE leave your THOOOTTSS and THOUGHTS!!! Frankie kneelings? Madonna chaneling hr anger??? Jonah doing... ALL THAT!!!!!!!

What are we thinking?

love you all so much! I know theres a lot of bullshit happening in the fandom but just know, dont trust everything you hear. I know at the very least one person the stupid confessions page is attacking is genuinely a kind, amazing person who was in the right <3 If there is a writer you dont think is nice or friendly enough... just keep it to yourself or talk to a few friends. You dont need to air it out publically.

Lets keep it chill, I say to me and my uuhhhh 30 readers B)

ANYWAY

Im like 60 followers away from 1000 followers on this account and i have a fun event planned!!!

I did this poll befoe, but its been like 10 chapters soooooooo

Save the children (which has absolutely nothing to do with QAnon who hijacked their hashtag) our currently supporting relief efforts in the Congo above our listed some quick facts that I hope you’ll take a moment to read, and if you can afford it, please consider making a donation. I have made a small one, but if we band together small donations make a difference

LOVE YOU ALL!

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[therealcocoshady]

Even if Marshall only has one biological daughter, for having other two daughters, and having Lily in 8 Mile, everyone agrees this man can only make girls, right? /hj

He just has Girl Dad vibes. Can I explain it in a way that is rational ? No. But the vibes are there.

And there is something so pure and sweet about the idea of him, the lyrical genius who can spit nasty bars, being the quintessential girl dad. I’m sure he’d be a great dad to a baby boy. But just imagine him embracing all things girly and princess-y for the sake of his baby girl. Choosing extra pretty outfits. Trying to master some hairdressing skills as she grows up. Learning much more than anyone needs to about Disney princesses, Barbies and whatnot. Being driven to a state of insanity because he’s got Disney song lyrics stuck in his mind. Attending an embarrassing amount of teddy bear tea parties…?

I know boys like that stuff too. But I’m sorry, the « Girl Dad » thing just adds an extra layer of softness, witch a touch of insane devotion. I’m sure he’d be a great father to a son, but you know a daughter would have him wrapped around her finger in a special way. And it’s even worse if she reminds him of her mama.

[slxshrfvcker]

slashers with a s/o who listens to metalcore

Featured above the cut:

Billy Loomis

Stu Macher

Featured below the cut:

Patrick Bateman

Michael Myers

Hannibal Lecter

Will Graham

Welcome To Horrorwood

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Billy Loomis & Stu Macher

Billy Loomis

Billy would be more amped up about the fact you listen to the metal genre, because he definitely enjoys it too.

If he comes home to you in your room dancing around and head banging to Slipknot or Korn or whatever your taste is, you bet your ass he’s gonna join in with you and rock out to your favorite songs too!

Loves to watch you attempt to sing the lyrics to songs like Custer by Slipknot or Freak On A Leash by Korn.

The song you both vibe together the most with is definitely Break Stuff by Limp Bizkit.

Extra points if you can play the electric guitar/bass, drums or some other instrument incorporated in the metal band genre.

Would be kinda freaked out at first by your fry vocals (if you could do them) but learns to appreciate them because he’s never seen anyone do it in person (poor babes is probably the only metalhead in Woodsboro…)

Definitely agrees to going to a concert (either locally or out of town) with you to see you vibe and enjoy yourself at your favorite band’s shows (he obviously will enjoy himself too!)

Will beat the shit out of whoever elbows you or something at a show

Then kills them after

Also kills anyone for bashing your music tastes

Stu Macher

Shocked at the fact you like such heavy stuff but kinda not at the same time because hello? He’s best friends with Billy for fucks sake.

Smiles and watching you from the side lines as you head bang and dance around to your music. (He might join in with you, with enough convincing)

He’s probably gonna agree to go with you to your fav band’s shows but he insists he has to hear ear protective things because he doesn’t want to get “a headache”. (You both forget anyways)

He will sit back and watch in adoration and amazement if you can play an instrument, the fry screams though will definitely freak him out (he’ll pretend that they don’t though)

Supportive of your music tastes anyways, he loves you for you and not just your music likes.

Kills anyone who hurts your feelings for liking the band/s you like. And also if you get hurt at a show he’s already planning to kill them afterwards.

Patrick Bateman

Honestly annoyed with the fact you like such violent heavy shit and would not hesitate to ask you to turn it down/off if he isn’t in the mood to deal with it

What the hell are you doing—? Why are you throwing your head back and forth like that? Are you brain damaged or something???

“Darling can you stop singing that god awful song I’m trying to focus here,”

Probably breaks your music player a few times bc he’s beyond annoyed with the songs blasting (he eventually will buy a new one)

Refuses to go to any shows with you because as I said before he dislikes it a lot

But if you come home hurt emotionally and or physically he will kill those who caused your pain.

Michael Myers

What is this?

It’s so loud and heavy but he kinda likes it?

Will probably just stand back and watch you vibe for a while before turning around and going to go do god knows what

If he comes home late at night and you are still rocking out he’ll simply turn it off and stare at you as if saying “it’s late go to bed”

He honestly doesn’t care if you come home all bruised from getting kicked or something at your show, he would give an amused look because you put yourself in that position to get hurt, but if you are truly upset or hurt pretty badly (bleeding or broken bones bad) he will begrudgingly go out and kill that person after tending to your wounds.

He honestly doesn’t even care what music you like as long as it doesn’t affect him physically/mentally

Hannibal Lecter & Will Graham

Their darling y/n liking such loud music?

Very odd to them because you look so cute and innocent, even with the way you dress (if you like all of the black and band tees)

They love to watch you vibe dance and headbang to your music because you look so damn cute doing it!!!

Takes you to every metal show you ever want to see, just so you are happy <33

If you get hurt by any means from anyone, then expect to have a very delicious meal the next day prepared by yours truly

They both pitch in to buy you albums, music players and instruments for you to enjoy your music more!

Very supportive of you no matter what, they love you! You are their darling y/n and you mean so much to them.

[feralwritings]

dissonance

part three

words: 4.2k

“I don’t care what he is, Gareth,” She cuts him off, “I’m just trying to get through this tour, okay? Corroded Coffin wasn’t exactly my idea of a good tour mate, but we play the cards we’re dealt, and I’m playing nice, aren’t I?” Gareth looks like he wants to retort, but she quells him with a stare and he raises his hands in surrender, the glowing bud of his cigarette waving through the air as he does. He turns to go back into the hotel, and she hears the sliding doors open, and then close. “He doesn’t hate you. I think you should know that.”

masterpost

taglist: @cam-peggio each notif you get for this fic must be a shock considering they're so spread out but i appreciate ya all the same hon

The arena in Phoenix is cold and empty when she walks into it, meandering towards the stage from the labyrinth of seats before her. When she finally reaches it, she clambers up, leaving her feet to dangle over the edge as she pulls out her phone.

This was the rehearsal space that Corroded Coffin had chosen for her to learn the song and practice it. They had a few options, seeming to narrow down on one. The one that she hoped beyond hope that they don’t choose, but judging by her luck, those lyrics are going to be ripped from her throat either way.

She’s here early, of course, alone in the quiet for a while. It’s almost peaceful, mostly haunting, looking out upon the rows of seats, thinking that she sees a phantom sitting in one before her eyes adjust, and it’s gone. Dealing with paranoia was never her strong suit, and she’s staring up at the nosebleeds, swearing that there’s movement up there when the stage rumbles below her.

She turns, seeing the boys wheeling equipment and instrument cases onto the stage. Eddie’s in the rear, and she smiles stiffly at each one as they pass by, allowing her smile to fall fully when Eddie looks at her.

She stands, quietly watching as they unload their gear, plug various cables into various panels, Joey, Jeff and Eddie tuning their guitars while Gareth adjusts the foot pedal for his kickdrum, giving it a few tests before nodding in satisfaction, drumming out a little fill, general rehearsal stuff.

And she’s there, in her hoodie and sweats, standing awkwardly downstage, waiting for them to tell her to do something, or even speak to her.

Of course, it’s Eddie who finally does, adjusting the height on his mic stand as he looks over at her, “We brought an extra mic, if you need it.”

She pulls out her own from her bag, waving it a little as she connects it to the soundboard, wired as opposed to not, easier to deal with for just a rehearsal.

“So,” she says, approaching Eddie, dragging a stand behind her, setting it a few feet away from him, as she slips her mic into the clip, “What song did you choose?”

There’s only a couple songs that feature another vocalist, and among those, none feature a female vocalist, so she can’t really think where she might fit into all this, if she can at all. The label said this might not work, it could end up being a one-off, something that she never has to do again.

“People love nostalgia, so we’re choosing one from our earlier years,” He says, bending to dig some lyric sheets out of his guitar case, handing them to her.

She reads the name at the top of the page, and her blood runs a bit cold.

It’s the song. The song that propelled them to stardom, the song that got them signed to a bigger label, the song that broke containment out of their sub-genre and reached the world at large, the song that sat at 86 on the Billboard Hot 100 for a month straight.

“You’re kidding,” She whispers, running the tips of her fingers over the printed ink, “You want me to sing this? With you?”

Eddie tilts his head at her, his brow furrowing, “Yeah, we haven’t performed it in a few years, thought it was time to bring it back around.”

She stares at him. She loves this song. Always has - even after everything went down, this was the song that she couldn’t quite manage to delete entirely from her library, simply removing it from her most frequent playlists, but it would sit there, like an old tome collecting dust. 

One of the reasons that the song broke containment was because of its rawness and vulnerability. The lyrics themselves, though steeped in excessive metaphor, paint a picture of devastating heartbreak. A heartbreak, though asked by every news outlet and interviewer and magazine and just about anyone could get a second with him, Eddie has never discussed. The fact that it's shrouded in mystery makes it all the more popular, superfans scrubbing through Eddie’s past, trying to figure out who it’s about. It starts off slow, building through the first chorus and into the second verse, and by the bridge it’s a cacophony of sound, overlapping bits of Eddie’s voice singing different parts, until they come into one succinct harmony during the final chorus. They haven’t made a song like it since. 

“Alright,” she exhales, “Where do you want me to come in?” 

“Was thinking near the second chorus, leading into the bridge. I could sing the harmony, you can sing the melody.”

Which, again, is a strange choice. Her voice, louder, higher than his will be what people mostly hear, and she doesn’t know if the return of this song, the song with her in it, is what people would even want. 

Eddie’s watching her, seeming to know that she’s mulling it over in her head. He takes a cautious step forward, and she snaps out of it, looking up into his face. 

“Listen,” he says, all tall, voice low, only meant for her, “We don’t have to like each other. Hell, we don’t even have to get along like best friends, but you and I both know this tour is going to suck ass if we’re always at each other's throats.”

She sighs, biting down on her cheek, “Yeah. Let's just…try and behave ourselves, I guess.” 

He nods, pulling his guitar from the case and slinging it across his shoulder. 

“Alright,” Eddie says, plucking out a little tune on the strings before approaching his microphone, “First verse.” 

***

She’s standing in the wings, tired from her own set but shaky about her part in this one. She can hear Eddie in her in-ears, can feel rather than hear the music, and as the lyrics inch closer and closer to her starting point, her heart rate jumps in her chest. 

Rehearsal had gone well enough, they’d decided that she would start singing when she was off the stage, and then walk on stage still singing. It’s a little Disney Channel, sure, but it didn’t really make sense for her to be on stage the whole time, awkwardly hovering by Jeff, waiting until it was time for her to sing. 

When the song had started, she could hear the cheers of the crowd, so loud that they had picked up on Eddie’s mic. He hadn’t really introduced it, just started playing the first few chords, recognizable enough that the crowd’s confused whispers had turned into a roar of excitement.

The second verse was finishing up now, the pre chorus ringing in her ears, Eddie’s raspy voice sending pins and needles down the length of her spine. He was a beautiful singer, there was no two ways about it, and try as she might to find more and more things wrong with him, with his music, with the band, with everything that had anything to do with him, she was coming up short, more and more. 

“Okay,” She hears one of the sound guy’s voices in her ear, Pete, maybe.

”Three.”

She takes a deep breath in.

”Two.”

She raises the microphone to her mouth.

”One.”

She starts to sing.

Her voice comes out stronger than she would’ve expected, higher, louder than Eddie’s like she knew it would be. Their harmony twists around each other, like both strands of a double helix around a DNA ladder, and judging by the way Eddie’s voice skips, he jerks his head to look at her, eyes wide, he’s just as surprised as she is. It didn’t sound like this in rehearsal, because they hadn’t been working together as they are now, off in their own worlds, in their own parts of the song, despite the fact that originally, the bridge was meant to be a cohesive piece.

It’s that way now, and as she walks out on stage, flashing a shy smile in greeting, Eddie holds out an arm in introduction, one hand off the neck of his guitar for a few seconds before it flies back, picking up the chords.

It goes well, considering.

For about thirty seconds.

When her in-ear cuts out, and she can only hear Eddie again, she figures that her mic is still on, and so she figures that she should keep singing, as the bridge is almost over. A quick glance at Eddie tells her that this is not the case, and she raises a finger to her mic in question, and he shakes his head, and then nods for her to come share his.

Which is quite literally the last thing she wants to do. She could just as well share Joey or Jeff’s mic, but they’re not even singing back up right now, and as the few seconds pass before she makes a decision, she can feel a lull in the crowd, and can hear, above all else, Stacy’s voice in her head, telling her to ride their coattails. 

She jogs up to Eddie’s side, having kept her distance from him this whole time. He moves to the right to accommodate her as she stands on tiptoe to reach his microphone, as it’s set just above her head.

She can hear herself again in Eddie’s mic, and she can feel Eddie himself pressed into her side, the neck of his guitar crossed in front of her like the blade of a sword, his elbow brushing against her as he changes chords.

The last few lines of the bridge approach, and her eyes slip to meet his. She can feel his breath on her face, they’re that close, and when the lights strobe around them, she can see the expression on his face in snapshots, apathy, then interest, then a softness that shows in his eyes, the way they half close when he looks down at her mouth, the way that the only thing separating their faces is the microphone between them. 

It’s over half a second later, Eddie’s turning back towards the crowd to sing the final notes of the song, and she slinks off stage in a way that she hopes isn’t obvious. Her job is done, she sang the fucking song, she can leave. 

She’s walking so fast back to Daisy Chain’s greenroom that she missteps and rolls her ankle in her shoe and falls against the wall, panting. 

The searing pain in her ankle is accompanied by a pounding in her chest, so loud that she can hear it in her ears. She sinks to the ground, putting her head between her knees, breathing deeply. 

She doesn’t know how long she’s there, breathing in, out, in, out. It could’ve been minutes or an hour, but sometime later she feels a hand on her shoulder, and jolts, head snapping up. 

It’s Steve. Thick eyebrows drawn together in concern, a small frown on his lips. 

“Are you okay?” He asks, pressing the back of his fingers to her cheek as if to check her temperature. 

“Yeah,” she chokes out, and he helps her stand. She puts a little weight on her ankle and it pounds, but not enough for her to not be able to limp back to the bus and ice it, “Just - got a bit -“

“Overwhelmed?” Steve offers, hand on her hip to steady her as she tries walking a few steps, “You seem to be like that a lot, lately. Is there something going on?”

She considers, for half a second, telling him. Telling him that her career, her livelihood and her passion hangs in the balance if she doesn’t play nice with Corroded Coffin, and with Eddie. That if she isn’t a good girl, that if she doesn’t stay on the marionette strings UDR has her on, she’ll lose the one thing she’s actually accomplished in her life. 

She also considers telling him that playing nice with Eddie is not as hard as she thought it would be, and that she wishes it was harder, so she’d have a reason, a tangible, solid reason to still hate him.

She shakes her head, though, gulping all of this back, “I think it’s just the adrenaline. That crowd was really loud.”

Steve nods, but she can tell that he doesn’t believe a word she’s saying. Despite his reputation for being a bit of a himbo, she’s come to find that he is actually quite perceptive. When she sees him, that is. She can count on one hand the number of times they’ve hung out on this tour, despite being almost a month into it.

He helps her back to the buses outside, and on the journey they talk a little. About the tour, about his music, about a little bit of everything and nothing at all. He’s on in less than 20 minutes, but he makes sure that she gets in okay before speeding away, into the waiting crowd of managers and crew, who all roll their eyes at him, in a fond sort of way.

She sheds what she can of her clothes, grabs a can of soda from the fridge and collapses onto her bed, resting the can between the wall of her bunk and her ankle. She stares up at the ceiling, and right before sleep takes over, she sees that flash of Eddie’s eyes again.

***

Her disappearing act doesn’t go unnoticed. Eddie’s salty about it during load out, tossing cables into his case in a pissy little way, so much so that she clamps her headphones over her head and ignores him for the rest of the day.

The girls had been concerned, telling her that they’d searched all through the venue for her before finally returning to the bus and finding her zonked out in her bunk. She gave a half apology and an even weaker explanation, folding in on herself like she always does.

They drive through the night to get to Santa Fe, having a few days to themselves before the show.

Both bands, and Steve spend this time apart, in their respective buses, and on day two, their hotel rooms. It’s nice to sleep in a full sized bed for once, even if Reader wakes up with Chrissy’s limbs wrapped around her like a koala.

On the third night, the night before the show, cabin fever sets in. It’s late, past 3 am when Reader moves Chrissy’s limbs off of her and pads quietly out of the hotel room and down the hall, tugging a hoodie on as she goes.

She just needs a little air, is all. She walks through the pristine hotel lobby and into the night, which has a chilly bite to it that has her pulling her hoodie closer around herself.

Stucco buildings tower around her. The hotel is situated on a quaint little street, with old fashioned orange street lamps lining the road, bathing everything around her in a warm, amber light that ignites a sad little twinge of nostalgia in her. Home, in Indianapolis, on crisp summer nights, biking home from band practice, throat sore and heart full.

She closes her eyes, the sound of distant traffic playing in her ears. Then, a much closer sound has her eyes flying open.

The click of a lighter sounds somewhere close, and she glances around, feeling an unearned and slightly misplaced terror that Eddie is lurking somewhere in the shadows. Her eyes eventually fall on a much shorter figure, and Gareth steps out of the alley between the hotel and adjacent building, and even from here, she can hear the music that is blaring through his headphones.

He startles when he sees her, eyes growing wide as he comically jumps back. She raises an eyebrow at him and he quickly collects himself, pulling his headphones off to rest around his neck before looking at her again.

“Couldn’t sleep?” He asks, in a would-be casual voice, but there’s a distinct undertone to it that makes her mouth taste a little sour.

“Not really. Chrissy is like a furnace.”

He murmurs something around his cigarette, something that sounds a little bit like lucky but she can’t be too sure.

“What’s her deal, anyway?” He suddenly asks.

“What do you mean?”

“Is she like,” He makes a vague gesture that she has no idea how to interpret, “Single?”

Reader bites back a grin and shakes her head, “Nah, she’s got a guy back home. They’re crazy about each other.”

She can tell he’s trying not to look devastated, and a little pinprick of pity sparks in her chest before she remembers that she doesn’t like him, then it goes from sad to pretty funny.

“What about you? Or Nancy and Robin?”

“Robin and Nance have been together since they were seventeen. Me? None of your business.”

He seems to know that none of your business means that she’s as single as the day is long, and it's his turn to feel pity or vindication, whichever one he wants.

It doesn’t show on his face what he does feel, expression made carefully blank. He takes another drag off his cigarette and turns his gaze towards the street.

“Eddie’s been pretty pissy since Phoenix,” He says, rather suddenly, eyes darting to her before they dart back toward the road.

She was afraid of the conversation veering into this territory, not wanting to think about or talk about Eddie, as much as she could help.

“Boo-hoo,” She deadpans, “Not my problem.”

“He’s not as bad as you think,” Gareth turns towards her now, eyebrows scrunched together in a display of earnestness, “He-”

“I don’t care what he is, Gareth,” She cuts him off, “I’m just trying to get through this tour, okay? Corroded Coffin wasn’t exactly my idea of a good tour mate, but we play the cards we’re dealt, and I’m playing nice, aren’t I?”

Gareth looks like he wants to retort, but she quells him with a stare and he raises his hands in surrender, the glowing bud of his cigarette waving through the air as he does.

He turns to go back into the hotel, and she hears the sliding doors open, and then close.

“He doesn’t hate you. I think you should know that.”

The doors open again, and she’s left standing there, in the chilly night air that just got about ten degrees colder.

***

She’s frenetic tonight, never staying in one place too long. She’s gone up to the barricade more than once, allowing several hands to grasp around her extended arm, while security keeps a tight hold on her legs to keep her from being pulled under.

Song after song, lyric after lyric, Eddie can’t keep his eyes off her from where he stands in the wings, a post that he’s taken up a little too often as of late. He makes excuses here and there, but always finds himself watching some part of their set before he trudges back to their green room to do warm ups.

He watches in almost indecent fascination as she gears up for the bridge of the song they’re playing, filling her lungs with air.

When the bridge comes, she whips her guitar around her body on the strap, so that it’s slung across her back. She seizes the microphone and rips it from the stand, the honeyed tones of her falsetto reverberating across the venue. A slow drum line builds as she sinks to her knees, and the lights go crazy, turning the sweat droplets that cling to her skin into a thousand tiny jewels, sparkling as brightly as the shimmery eyeshadow packed onto her closed eyes. The crowd goes fucking wild as she tilts her head back, hair cascading like the branches of a willow tree down her back. 

Fuck, Eddie thinks, watching her from the side of the stage, watching as her brow furrows, watching as she bangs her head in time with the whine of the electric guitar riff that Chrissy’s shredding out.

She’s back on her feet again, slipping the microphone back into the stand, bringing her guitar back to her front, fingers sliding across the neck as she strums the rhythm section of the final chorus, grinning into the microphone as she sings, hips swaying to and fro, the curve of her ass peeking out from underneath her skirt as she bends at the knees a little. 

She’s so fucking pretty. She is so fucking pretty and Eddie can’t breathe. When the song ends, and she honest to god giggles into the microphone, the noise being amplified and echoed around the venue, and Eddie can’t help but feel like this whole thing has been specifically designed to make his knees weak. 

“Wow!” She exclaims, tossing a couple picks into the crowd, “Thank you so much! That tune is one of my favorites, and on almost every stop on this tour, it's gotten a bigger and bigger response.”

Robin drums out her agreement, and Reader looks over her shoulder with a smile, before turning to the audience again, introducing their next song.

And all Eddie can do is watch. He watches her dance to the beat, smile to herself, watches her fingers fly lovingly across her guitar. She’s a little firecracker when she’s on stage, always in motion, and it’s so electrifying, so fucking endearing that Eddie feels the hair on his arms stand up when her shimmering, graphic liner gaze falls on him for a millisecond. 

She sings about love. She sings about sex, about nostalgia and about the ocean, sings about the minutiae of human experience and heartbreak, each lyric captivating and masterful, tugging at the exact right parts of the brain, evoking what feels like a million different responses in Eddie, from skipped heartbeats to a tightening in his jeans to a hot sting in his eyes, and he can’t quite take it anymore. 

Corroded Coffin is next, he knows that, but he - fuck, he needs a minute. He ducks away from stage right and heads to their green room, pouring out a shot of whiskey and downing it, hands clenched around the edge of the vanity, head bowed towards his chest. 

It’s mystifying that this girl, who’s capable of such vitriol towards him, who avoids him at every turn, who has nothing but contempt for him can reduce him to this with lyrics and vibrato and sweetness reserved for no one else but the crowd in front of her. 

If he has to stand smushed against the barricade, metal digging painfully into his skin as sweaty bodies press into him to catch even a little bit of that sweetness, to catch a stray smile, he’d do it.

Which is so fucking ridiculous that it pisses him off. He’s got people knocking down the door for even a chance to fuck him. He could go out there right now, flash a smile at anyone and would probably end up getting his dick wet for it, a hot mouth against his. 

But he wants her, and it is infuriating, because he knows, he fucking knows that it’s never going to happen. She wouldn’t want him even if he was the last man on planet earth. 

He supposed this is what he deserves for that throwaway comment, and the utter lack of humility to go to her after, through text or DM or pull her aside as she walked into UDR, tell her that he’s sorry, he’s so fucking sorry and not only that, he’s an idiot, a callous, selfish idiot that had eyes and ears for nothing else but his own band, his own success, so much so that he was willing to step on her neck get ahead. 

If only he had known - fuck. How talented she truly was, would it have made a difference? Even if she sucked, even if her band couldn’t hold a tune it still wouldn’t have mattered, it wouldn’t have made that comment okay, in any way shape or form. 

It’s retroactively humiliating, but he knows, as he glares at himself in the mirror, hating himself, that his humiliation is nothing to what they’d done to Daisy Chain. 

He's so wrapped up in his self-loathing spiral that he doesn’t really register that the music warbling through the walls of the venue has stopped. He only comes back to his senses when the door opens and peels of laughter seep into the room, the clunk of platform shoes proceeding the girls, save for Robin and her keds, all smiling and sweaty.  

Reader’s eyes land on him first, and her smile disappears in an instant. 

Up close, he can see her makeup running a bit, can see the tired sorta droop to her eyes and he can smell her perfume mixing with her sweat, which normally would’ve been kinda gross but in this instance, sends his brain into a tailspin worse than it already had been.

Chrissy speaks first, “I think we have the wrong room.”

They do, as the bands were afforded separate green rooms, the one that Eddie’s standing in presenting a distinct lack of everything the girls own. 

They all file out after Chrissy’s proclamation. All except for Reader. 

She’s staring at Eddie, eyes narrowed in suspicion. 

“Are you…” She hesitates, shifting her weight from foot to foot, “Alright?”

How uncharacteristic. Up until now, Eddie was under the impression that she truly didn’t care if he lived or died. So, it’s somewhat shocking that she’s displaying even a shred of concern for him, even if it looks like the words taste sour in her mouth. 

“Yeah,” he manages, straightening up, “Yeah, I’m good, thanks.”

She nods curtly, “Good. You’re up, by the way.” She jerks a thumb over her shoulder in the general direction of the stage. 

And with that, she’s closing the door with a snap, leaving him alone.

[spadesolace]

the idea of yoo - 1.1. alone with yoo (half-written)

previous | next

words: 1.5k

warnings: a bit of homophobia, discussion about religion, implied cheating

the sun shining through a small window, your eyes twitch as the sunlight hits you perfectly. in your line of sight, sight adjusting through the bright yet also dim room. it smells a bit rugged, similar to yeonjun’s perfume he had made you and rei smell before his date, bed is a bit harder than your usual one at home, and you’re still wearing yesterday’s clothes. in the corner of your eye, was the table tennis - you’re at the choi household.

slowly sitting up, looking for your phone that yeonjun had placed on his bedside table, along with some medicine, water, and hangover drink. underneath was a note with messy handwriting.

hey, when you wake up i would be at rehearsals for tomorrow’s dance battle. left some medicine so drink it right away. yeonie

as you hastily drank the medicine and pick up the hangover drink, ready to leave and get some proper meal. the sound of footsteps and chatter was making its way towards your destination. vaguely, you could make up yeonjun’s mom’s voice and yoo jimin.

“yeonjun is at rehearsal, but you can leave that here on his-” his mom sees you by the bed, wearing your coat and getting your stuff, along with hiding some of the letters that you’ve written for yeonjun’s recipe to food critics to try, and letters from jimin.

“yeonjun’s japanese friend, didn’t hear you come in.”

“just dropping off some notes.”

“jimin is also drop-” the faint breaking of glass was heard upstairs, making yeonjun’s mom rush back upstairs.

the last time you were alone with jimin was when you bumped into her in the hallway, the start of it all. it’s a bit awkward, looking like you spent the night - in which you did - but also it seemed like you’re dating yeonjun. deep inside, you’re thinking how pretty jimin is despite it being so early in the morning.

“hi.” she breaks the tension, a small smile plastered on her face.

“hi.” your breath is taken away; standing in front of a girl who you considered could have been sculpted by aphrodite.

“are you and paul-” then you remember, she’s not here for you.

“OH GOSH NO! he is totally 100 percent into you.”

“you know about… us?”

“that’s what the notes and books are for, he wanted to do some extra reading.” jimin seemed amused by it, partially because no one has been that thoughtful to learn more about their interests and hobbies.

the awkward silence slowly crept back, part of you wanted to leave, no longer wishing to take part in this. the girl you developed feelings for is talking to a guy who you helped in writing the letters for, making an image of him in her mind. 

you deceived jimin.

you deceived yeonjun.

they fell in love with the image you had made to deceive both of them.

all you could hear coming out of jimin’s mouth was self-deprecating words regarding her first impression during their first date. nothing made sense anymore, nothing held you back.

“you could never be an idiot. yeonjun wouldn’t think of you that way.” you still held back, not wanting to expose yourself. there is the desire to leave and run away, forget this entire thing happened.

“i should probably get back home.” picking your bag up, noticing jimin was holding onto a piece of paper.

“this- its- its nothing really, something i made during the trip.” still she handed it over to you, lyrics; you assume it to be lyrics of a new song she wrote.

“i like one of the lines from the second verse… lonely yet hopeful.” giving it back to jimin, smiling shyly about to leave her in this man cave that is yeonjun’s room.

“he’ll love it.” i love it.

“yeah…”

“i should get going.”

“can i come with?”

you don’t know how it happened, how you’re walking in the middle of an abandoned train track kicking a stone as you pass by the abandoned cart, no longer filled with writings. there’s another one, not that far off that you and rei go to when you need a change in your routine.

“you’re not scared?” stopping in your tracks, slight confusion evident in your face.

“no, i’m used to this route. a change in scenery.” jimin hummed as the stone you were kicking seemed to have merged with the rest of the pebbles.

“you wanna get out of here?”

it feels surreal, you’re in jimin’s car, listening to the radio mostly 90’s music playing, windows down and the wind blowing your hair. months ago, you couldn’t believe that jimin knew who you were, yet here you are.

“where we going?”

“my favorite secret place.”

you stopped in the middle of a forest, a part of you sort of feared where this was going because who would bring someone to a forest if not to kill them? or maybe you’ve been watching too much true crime that rei has been so adamant in you watching it with her. when you saw the clearing, maybe it wouldn’t be that bad to be killed by the girl you like. it’s just a hot spring, and it worried you when jimin started unpacking her duffel bag, only to pull out a small radio. you’re just stuck in this place with her, turning your back at her when she started removing her sundress. you’re not sure if she removed her undergarments but just the idea that she’s probably skinny dipping makes your face heat up.

jimin turns around as your gaze looks everywhere except for her. you looked at her back for a bit, toned, smooth, and her hair despite being wet already it stil remained smooth and silky. so, you stripped, not fully. she only turned back to face you when she heard a bit of water splashing. an embarrassed smile was evident as jimin takes in what you’re wearing.

“oh i almost forgot.” you thought it was from the heat from the hot spring that made you feel this way but confirming that jimin is indeed naked walking around the area and setting up the small radio. you submerged yourself underwater.

“there’s no cell service here, nothing could reach us here.”

“so if you kill me, completely leave me here to decompose and scream, no one would come to rescue me?”

it was a lighthearted joke, one that made jimin laugh as she dipped back into the spring and you still avoided looking at her body. things were going well, talking about interests, family, religion, everything under the sun as you played around in the water.

“i don’t think i’ve hanged out with a girl and not talk about boys before.”

“oh… sorry.”

“no, no… it’s nice, actually.” you nod to her statement, maybe this could be a way to help yeonjun out.

“yeonjun’s nice.” jimin looks at you, pondering. she can’t put a finger on it but she tries to explain her emotions.

“he’s... confusing.” 

“how?”

”when i’m with him, i feel... safe. he’s a sweet guy, don’t get me wrong. then he writes these things that feel... not so safe.” you tilt your head as you process everything, you wrote those things, the letters, the messages, everything - you wrote it.

“not safe?”

“makes me wonder, think about things - all this time i was set on this idea of marrying jeno but then here comes yeonjun when i asked god for a sign. god doesn’t know either or he’s not telling.”

“i don’t believe in god.”

“that must be so nice.”

“it’s not…” you slowly submerged yourself into the water, jimin still observing you, everything feels weird. “it’s lonely.”

“i wished i knew what i believed in.” you tune everything out, listening to jimin’s rant about jeno already planning their future wedding, her asking a sign to god if that was what love is. simply accept it and be grateful. but the letter appeared the following day, the letter you wrote and what started this whole thing.

“silly, right?” you shake your head as you swim closer to her.

“no, its not.”

“but you know what’s silly?” everything moved so fast that your oversized shirt was removed from you, a triumphant smile but easily replaced by her laughing.

“did you layer?” now, you’re left with your undergarment and a black tank top.

time went by so slowly, you’re talking to her about life, love, religion, while floating on your back next to her listening to a radio playing old songs. the current song playing was your mom’s favorite song, waiting for the best part, the climax as she would say.

“my mom also told us that every song, movie, story has a best part.” patiently waiting, letting it pass and enjoy each other’s presence and the song you heavily associated with your mom. a part of you wants to reach out to jimin and hold her hand as the song continues on. 

“was that it?”

“you asking or stating?”

the best part - is when you actually hold onto jimin’s hand as you float like otters. the song playing in the background as the lyrics perfectly encapsulate what you feel for her. words can’t express your feelings - pain from knowing the girl you like is straight and seeing your only friend but also happiness from getting such a small moment together that you’ll cherish till you leave this little place called kwangya.

you may not believe in god, but if falling in love with yoo jimin is a sin. call me a sinner, then.

taglist [CLOSED]:

@1luvkarina @beawolfbealionbeyou @pandafuriosa60 @txtbrainrot @rinapomu @limbforalimb @yoontoonwhs @noascats @thefckghost @petruchiosstuff

[btstulip]

Wait, what did I just watch?!

When I first became interested in BTS, it was because my Facebook algorithms thought I might be interested in them and kept showing me fun videos. They were not wrong and I got sucked into watching BTS more and more.

As you can imagine, I quickly started getting fed videos of popular ships... mostly Taekook. Being new to BTS (and K-Pop and "ships" for that matter), there were definitely moments that I could admit looked like the actions you might see between romantic partners and it did get me wondering if any of the BTS members might actually be together. But I also knew close friends could sometimes look like a couple to people that don't understand their relationship. I have friends I kiss and cuddle with, but never once did I plan to date them. Add to the fact that I originally assumed some of this was just fanservice, something I no longer believe after much research here on Tumblr convinced me that BTS doesn't participate in traditional fanservice after their early debut stage. I knew it would take a lot to convince me any relationship was more than that of two very close people that cared about each other very much.

So I watched these Taekook and other videos with a lot of skepticism. I dismissed many of these videos right away as just playful people that enjoyed skinship with someone they were close to. But a couple caused me to find longer clips to check context. Most of these looked like nothing when played at full speed, uncut/edited, or with conversation context. And the more I watched of BTS, the more I could see how close and unique each of their relationships were. I loved how much they cared for each other and I wasn't invested in any of these guys having more than the close family relationship I could see they all shared. Still, I was curious if there was something all these fans knew about Tae and Jungkook that I didn't, so I kept looking.

I should add here that I was only days in to my BTS obsession research at this point. I had lost more sleep than I want to admit watching "one more video" for hours at a time desperately trying to answer the next burning curiosity, but still, I had only just started learning about the members of BTS. At this point, I absolutely believe all the BTS members care deeply for each other. They are family and have a bond I don't think any of us can really understand. These are 7 individuals that each share a unique bond with each other and as a whole. I don't think any relationship "competes" with another and each should be honored.

Though I wasn't expecting to be convinced that any of these members were actually dating, my desire to put context to these cute clips I kept seeing made me want to understand their relationships more... especially Tae and Jungkook because my video feed was FULL of these! I often found tumblr posts explaining the moments/relationships that gave me clues and insights about the members that I didn't have yet. The arguments I read for Taekook seemed possible, but I was sure there were similarly convincing arguments for all the ships. So I decided that I had to research the other ships to either prove or disprove that Tae and Jungkook actually had something extra.

I decided to start looking into Jimin and Jungkook. At the time, I just picked that "ship" first. But I am sure it was because I had already noticed how close those two are. Most of the stuff I dismissed, especially anything on stage. But I kept reading and watching "evidence", rinse and repeat. Definitely cute moments, eyebrow raising moments, some super questionable stuff on stage (2018 I am looking at you!), but I saw that stuff with Taekook too. I saw GCF Tokyo mentioned several times, how Jimin and Jungkook went to Tokyo together and Jungkook made a music video. And somehow this was amazing "proof", so I decided I should look that up.

The skeptic I am, I started watching and saw two guys that are very close, on a trip together, having fun. Lyrics talking about being there for each other. So cute! They are so close and this shows how much Jimin's friendship means to Jungkook. I loved it, but I could not understand how this was the ultimate proof everyone accepted. And then, 3 minutes in, when the video was almost over and I had basically decided it was about a beautiful bromance, it happened...

Boy, I'm holdin' onto something Won't let go of you for nothing I'm runnin', runnin' just to keep my hands on you

Eyebrows raises, well that is definitely romantic. And then, seconds later, my brain broke...

There was a time that I was so blue What I got to do to show you? I'm runnin', runnin' just to keep my hands on you Runnin', runnin' just to keep my hands on you

My jaw was on the floor. What did I just watch?!? That wasn't "proof", that was PROOF! There was no way to spin that other than a full on love confession. Did he actually do that? I can't believe any member of a K-pop group would do something so loud that is almost impossible to take any other way, unless you cover both eye and plug your ears!

I needed confirmation. More context. I read blogs all about GCG Tokyo and they delivered. Jikook fans gave me even more details, things I didn't understand because I was a BTS newborn (still a baby, maybe toddler, but growing quickly). Solo trip together on personal time, big deal. Jungkook recorded and edited the video, releasing it only a week later. Wow. Jungkook is a perfectionist that cares about his art and chose the song for a reason. Check. The song is by an openly gay artist? Why are we still discussing this?!

Still, I wanted an outside perspective. One not looking for this video to confirm anything with little context. So I made my sister watch it. Told her it was these two guys went on a trip together and one recorded and made this video. What did she think? "It's a love confession." Two of my kids also agreed... the third is a teenage boy that is horrified that his mom is obsessed spending all her time watching BTS and he refused to see it as anything other than someone saying "you need to be there for me too".

I suppose it's possible this was just about friendship. I suppose I could be wrong. I'm not Jungkook and unless he tells us, I will never know. But unless Jungkook denies it directly, you CAN NOT make me believe that video was anything other than one person telling another that they love them.

Sorry this post is SO LONG! I didn't expect it to be this long, but it was super fun. Thanks for sticking around and reading my TMI. <3

[brave-and-gentle]

your Second Chances fic (which has been so much angsty fun btw!!) opens on Jean's birthday, and he's got some complicated feelings about everything that's happened in 29 years of his life, so I was wondering about your hc's in relation to aging and stuff! :)

how does Jean feel about getting gray hairs eventually, does he embrace it? (is he aware that he's a dilf?)

how does he handle Mason's first day of high school, or teaching him how to drive?

as he settles into DadHood(tm) over the years, what kind of habits or quirks does he develop?

+ anything else pls yap away

Lyric!! <3 you know I love a chance to yap about dilf Jean.

Jean is soooo pretentious that he's terrified of getting gray hairs. He frequently makes jokes about driving his car off a cliff if he ever finds one. Connie teases him relentlessly about it - "oh?? Jean boy?? is that a gray hair i spy?? "NO! it's just a blonder hair, it's the lighting!"

Also related to aging, he has a whole fucking 10-step skin care routine to avoid wrinkles. He's got some light, respectable crow's feet settling in that he'll eventually learn to accept.

Lucky for Jean, he won't get any gray hairs until his mid-40s, and will maintain a full head of hair practically into his 60s - his careful hair care routine will pay off.

Jean has absolutely no idea that he's a dilf. He's clueless. The moms at the playground, married and single, swoon over him, but given his circumstances divorce from Mikasa the most perfect woman ever, he doesn't really notice because he simply doesn't believe anyone will look at him like that again oh my god i'm sorry that got dark.

Jean is so nervous about Mason's first day of high school that he offers to home school him. With all the new freedoms of high school, Jean is freaking out a little bit, wondering if his son will find his footing, especially because his son is, well, a little bit of a nerd. He's one of those lanky weird guys that runs cross country and reads *a lot.* (my favorite kind of guy, tbh). Mason says "absolutely not, you'd be a terrible teacher." Jean knows this is true, his son is smarter than him. He also tries to offer to drive him to school and Mason refuses that too - he'd rather bike by himself.

Mason is actually a little reticent to drive - Jean doesn't mind this at all, why bother with the extra danger? But Mikasa makes him a deal that she'll bring him to the bookstore and he can choose THREE books if he learns how to drive. This actually works very well.

One of Jean's biggest fears is that Mason will get hurt and he can't do anything about it - so he gets CPR certified every two years AND has a first aid kit in the house and the car. (this is actually a very smart thing to do btw)

NAME BRAND SNACKS. Jean does not skimp here.

Shoes MUST be taken off before entering the house damnit!! Not when Jean worked so hard to get the nice hardwood floors cleaned.

Jean is such a simp that he'll give in pretty easy if Mason asks for a candy bar at the grocery store check out.

Jean *always* has dinosaur chicken nuggets in the freezer because it's Mason's favorite (sneak peak - this will be *very* important later in Second Chances).

[hockeynoses]

Served Just the Way You Like - R/oy x Jam/ie snz fic

Summary: Jamie is sick on game day but thinks he can still play. Roy refuses to let him, but he finds a way he can still be useful – infecting the opposing team with his cold.

Rating: PG-13 (as far as non-snz stuff goes). 4.5k.

Warnings: MESS! Some D/s elements. Malicious contagion via snzing on food. (The results of said contagion are implied, not shown.) If this sounds like too much for you, turn back now! I cannot stress enough how the main part of this fic is just Jamie snzing on the opposing team's catering setup.

Notes: I never thought I'd reach the point where I was comfortable not only writing something like this, but sharing it. So I hope you all enjoy! It took me three months on and off to finish this. And this goes without saying, but I would never condone something like this IRL, and in fact, I would hate it!

The title is a lyric from Table for Two by Joe. What a throwback!

-

Jamie drives to the club, excited to finally see Roy after a long five days apart. Roy had taken his sister and Phoebe for a long weekend in Germany – a trip to indulge Phoebe’s niche cultural obsessions and because Ruth and Roy are such workaholics that they’d both promised to push each other to go on vacation every so often.

The trip had been planned before Roy and Jamie were even a thing, and Jamie couldn’t go anyway - he had a photoshoot for a brand deal that weekend. It ended up being for the best – Jamie started coming down with something the day Roy left. It’s developed into a real bitch of a head cold – they’d had to put extra makeup on his face for the photoshoot so he didn’t look like he was dying, and he’d been constantly asking for tea to soothe his burning throat.

Missing Roy was a fierce ache that lingered all weekend. He selfishly wanted nothing more than for him to be back home so he could take care of Jamie. But Jamie was trying to be an adult, and that meant he wasn’t allowed to be clingy or call his boyfriend to whine at him while he was enjoying his vacation.

They had only exchanged a few texts over the weekend, Roy sending him pictures when he could. His flight had gotten in late last night, so Roy had gone straight to his own place, barely having time to unpack before he fell asleep.

Jamie had an early night as well, his body aching and exhausted. Still feverish, he’d had a night of fitful sleep, dreading the game the next day.

Now that Roy’s a coach, he has to get to the club earlier on game days, and Jamie usually sleeps in, going about his usual game day routine, heading to the club in the early afternoon.

At last, Jamie rounds the corner and sees the locker room doors, his small waist pack weighing more heavily on him due to how wrung out he’s feeling, though the added weight could be from the packet of tissues and some cough drops he’d stashed into one of the pouches. He’s dreading the game today, but is determined to suck it up and play. It’s his job as a professional athlete, and he doesn’t want to let the team down. He’s pretty sure he’s played through worse.

A whisper of a memory floats through his foggy brain – his dad’s voice, calling him a fuckin’ pansy for complaining of a fever before a game. He’d only been a teenager, but he’d quickly learned to hide any sign of weakness around his father, and by association, around the team.

At least he’ll get to see Roy after such a long weekend away. It’s still fairly early in their relationship and he knows Roy doesn’t mind, but Jamie still feels the need to dial back his neediness sometimes. He knows he can be a lot, and he doesn’t want to scare Roy off by being too much at once. He’s been dying for Roy to come back and take care of him, but they’ve never been in this situation before, and he isn’t sure how Roy will react. Maybe all the bedside manner in the Kent gene pool had gone to his sister.

Before he enters the room, a telltale prickle creeps through his sinuses and he stops in his tracks, bringing a hand up to pinch his nose as a painful stifle tries to force its way out. “ha-kxxSH!” His exhale is a relieved sigh. There’s a good chance that no one heard that. But pinching his nose has turned it an even deeper shade of red, one he can’t do much to hide. And denying himself the release of a sneeze has his sinuses feeling like they’re packed with cement and buzzing unpleasantly.

Once he’s certain there are no more sneezes about to creep up on him, he steels himself and heads into the locker room, greeted by the sound of teammates chatting.

He sets his stuff down on the bench by his locker, turns, and immediately he locks eyes with Roy, who’s been keeping an eye out for him from his desk. If Jamie wasn’t fluent in Roy by now, he would’ve missed the slight quirk of his lips and the way his eyes brighten at the sight of Jamie. It makes Jamie feel properly warm in a way he hasn’t felt in days – a gooey, happy feeling that floods outward from the center of him.

Roy moves first, coming out of his office to greet him. Even though they’re out to the team, a one-armed hug and clap on the back is all they usually allow themselves at work.

“Welcombe back,” Jamie says, voice genuine, as he clings a little longer than mere colleagues would. He can’t help himself; it’s been a shit weekend and he’s allowed this one comfort. He wants nothing more than to sink into Roy’s arms and bury his face in the warmth of his neck. It takes all he has to fight the urge.

“Thanks,” Roy says, rubbing his hand across Jamie’s shoulders before pulling back.

Jamie drinks in the sight of him. “Looks like you godt sombe sudn, Grandad.” He gives him his most charming smile, jealous of the sun that got to kiss Roy’s skin all weekend.

Roy rolls his eyes good-naturedly. “Yeah, it was hot as fuck, and Phoebe had us running all over on all sorts of adventures.”

“Looks good odn you,” Jamie says, voice low. The intensity in Roy’s eyes is telling. He’s been missing Jamie just as much, and can’t wait to get his hands on him later tonight.

“You look…” Roy pauses, truly taking him in, “a bit tired, actually.”

“Oi!” Jamie protests, his throat burning with the effort. He whacks Roy’s shoulder with the back of his hand, indignant. “Thad’s dnot a dnice thing to say.”

“I’m saying it as a concerned coach!” Roy argues. “Did you sleep okay last night?”

Before he can answer, Jamie has no choice but to snuffle up some congestion, his runny nose finally getting the best of him. He wipes it with his palm, rubbing the tip of his nose in circles to stave off a developing itch.

“Yeah, bmate, got plendy of sleeb.” The forcefully chipper statement is immediately followed by a shaky inhale, and he snaps his hand up just in time to stifle a telling, “ha-kxxxgt!” into his fist.

“Tartt, if you’re sick-” Roy studies him with a stern look.

“I’b nodt sigck,” he says, betrayed by a marshy sniffle. “Idt’s allergies.”

“You’re not allergic to anything.”

Right, Jamie thinks, as a coach, he’d have had a look at all the players’ medical files.

“People can develop allergies as adults.” His croaky voice turns petulant, aware that he’s fighting a losing battle.

Roy stares at him, knowing that Jamie will give in to the need to break the silence and eventually say something incriminating. He doesn’t have to wait long before Jamie’s nose does it for him. It starts to twitch, his eyelids fluttering closed before he’s forced to cup his hands over his face and curl forward with a massive- “heh… heh’eehhRRRSSHOO!” It coats his palms in enough spray and spit that he has to wipe them on his pants. Jamie looks up sheepishly, embarrassed at having his cover blown so quickly.

“It sounds to me like you’ve caught a hell of a cold.”

“I’b fine.” The corners of Jamie’s mouth pull down in a frustrated pout.

“Where did you even pick this up?”

“I don’t know, bman.” Jamie tries and fails to keep the tired whine out of his voice. A cool hand presses to his forehead and he sighs at the feeling.

“Jesus, you’re burning up.” Roy says. The concern in his voice floods pleasantly through Jamie, always grateful for Roy’s attention. “You can’t play like this.” At that, Jamie snaps back to attention.

“The fucgk I cadn’t! Me legs work jusdt fiiiihh hih’AEESSHH’IUE!” Into his hands again, followed by an irritated cough that’s just starting to move into his chest. A few heads turn their way, and the guys nearest to him take a step back in unison.

“Jamie, you’re clearly not well enough to play. And as your coach, that’s my call to make.” Roy says firmly, voice deep with authority. He places a placating hand on his shoulder. “It would be irresponsible of me to let you play right now.”

Jamie’s gaze cuts downward, feeling like an unruly child being scolded. He drags the back of his hand under his nose and gives a thick sniffle, still fighting against his runny nose.

“Christ, you even look contagious. Do you want to get the whole team sick? You should have told me sooner.”

“You were on vacatiodn! I didn’t wadnt to mbake a big deal oudt of idt.” His dad’s comments filter through his head again, and he decides he’s not going to have that conversation in the middle of a crowded locker room.

“You still could have told Ted or Beard. Or texted me this morning. I wouldn’t have been mad, Jamie.”

“I’b sor- ehh…hih’TTSSHOO!” The inner elbow of his very expensive hoodie gets a generous spritzing.

“Hmm? What was that?” Roy asks with raised eyebrows.

“I said I’b – ggsh’IISHIEW! SNF. I’b sorry!” He has to wipe his nose on his sleeve before he can show his face again. It seems like each day of this horrid cold has brought with it increasingly messy sneezes, with no end in sight.

“Good boy,” Roy offers, a dash of condescension mixed in with his genuine tone. It affects Jamie all the same, warming him down to his toes. He should be embarrassed, but he’s too worn down to care. He almost sways with the relief of it - or maybe that’s the fever he hasn’t managed to shake. Roy drapes an arm across his shoulders, holding him in place.

“Let’s get you out of here. God knows we don’t need a fucking virus taking down the entire team at this point in the season, with the league table being as it is.”

A spark of an idea lights up Roy’s face at that, and he pauses, considering. Once again taking in Jamie’s sorry state – his cheeks ruddy with fever, his glassy eyes, and his poor raw nose. So clearly full of cold and extremely contagious. Having made up his mind, Roy gestures to Ted and Beard that he’s taking Jamie home, and that he’ll be back in time for the match. Business taken care of, he turns back to Jamie.

“Follow me,” Roy says as he manhandles him out of the room and down the hallway. Jamie has to muffle a few sneezes into the collar of his hoodie along the way, Roy holding him steady through each one. He’s so out of it that it takes him a while to realize they’re not taking the usual route out of the stadium.

“Where we goin’?” he asks, groggily wiping at the clear mess seeping out of one nostril.

“Just trust me. And try not to draw too much attention to yourself,” Roy says, as though that’s something that comes naturally to Jamie.

Roy uses his employee badge to get them into a door deep within the maze of the staff-only areas of the stadium. Opening it slowly, he scans the room to make sure it’s empty before pulling Jamie inside.

“Whadt are we doin’ ‘ere?” Jamie asks, blinking hazily. They’re in the lounge area for the visiting team; he recognizes it from when he played here with City. It’s outfitted with a full kitchen, dining tables, couches, TVs – the works.

It should still be about 30 minutes before the opposing team arrives, but the room has already been prepared for them. The fridge is stocked; silverware, plates, and glasses are all arranged on one end of the long counter, and the catering team has set out trays of food on beds of ice to keep them cool. There’s a tray of sushi, a gorgeous charcuterie board, a large bowl of salad, and some cold cuts for sandwiches, among other hot dishes being kept warm by small heaters under their covered metal trays.

“I have an idea,” Roy says with an evil glint in his eye. Jamie recognizes that look from training and knows well enough to be very, very afraid.

“…What?”

“You’re gonna contaminate their food and get all these fuckers sick, like the plague rat you are.” Roy shares an intense, secretive grin with Jamie, clearly proud of himself.

A shocked grimace pulls at Jamie’s features.

“Roy, that’s sigck. We cadn’t…” His breath scissors in and out. “We c-cadn’t do that! Hih…ha-ESSSHH’uh!”

“Of course we can.” Roy’s strong fingers give Jamie’s shoulder a shake, caught up in the excitement of his plan. “Think of the standings, mate! If a bunch of their best players are out the next couple of weeks, their numbers are gonna tank and we’ll move up a couple spots!”

Jamie stares at him in awe. “You really - hah…ha’XXGSH’uu! You really are a sadist.” Roy pins him with a knowing look. A flush prickles across Jamie’s cheeks and neck, and there’s a tug of heat in his core. Roy follows his lead, crowding into his space. He thrusts his fingers into Jamie’s thick hair.

“Well, you’re the one who showed up for a game that you’re obviously too sick to play, and you risked getting the rest of the team sick, so now I’m the one making the decisions.” He pulls Jamie closer to him, tugging gently on his hair. The words are growled softly against his cheek like a secret. “Which means I get to use you however I want, and you’re gonna let me.”

Jamie chokes on a moan, breath catching in his throat. Roy pulls back, his eyes flashing dark.

“Yeah?” Roy asks, giving him an out if he needs it. They’ve been together long enough that they can read each other clearly. Even though they might have their communication issues outside the bedroom, sex and its related power dynamics have always been something that they’re really, really good at.

“Yeah,” comes Jamie’s answering rasp. His eyes are needy, reverent. He can trust Roy. Roy will take care of him. And he gets to be useful. He can still help the team win, even in this twisted roundabout way that Roy’s found.

He’s afforded the soft brushing of Roy’s fingers against his cheek before he’s abruptly caught by the elbow and firmly escorted towards the long counter with trays of food on it.

“Right then,” Roy surveys the room, creating a plan of attack. “We should probably hit all the cold stuff first… not bother with the hot trays since they’re probably warm enough to burn off the germs… or something. Right?”

“Fugk iihh- hep’TIISSHuh!” Jamie sneezes down into his cupped hands, held inches away from his face. “Ugh. Fugk if I know.” He glances at his moist palms before swiping them dry on his pants.

Roy rolls his eyes. “Don’t waste all those sneezes before we even start.”

“Sorry, Jesus.” Jamie’s brows furrow in a little pout as he wipes his damp, squishy nose on the side of his hand.

Roy, anxious to get started and with an eye on the clock, grabs Jamie’s arm with gentle authority and steers his body towards the tray on the end of the counter. It looks like a lovely house salad, Jamie thinks absently, staring down at it. When he glances back at Roy, the other man is watching him expectantly.

“Alright, go for it.”

“I cadn’t just… do it odn commband!”

“Now’s not the time for performance anxiety, Tartt.”

“Ha-ha. You’re bloody hilari-hihh!” He sucks in a sharp inhale as the fuzzy sensation in his nose starts up again. “ihh...hih…ha’iigg’SHH’IUE!” On instinct, he turns his head down, bringing his elbow up in an aborted attempt to cover. About half the sneeze escapes and mists the salad below, the rest of it ends up on the sleeve of his hoodie.

“Christ’s sake, the whole point is to not cover!” Shifting behind him, Roy gathers Jamie’s arms together behind him before clamping a large hand over both wrists. Heat thrums through Jamie’s veins, his awareness narrowing to the squeezing pressure of Roy’s hands. He fights the urge to squirm.

“Try again.” The husky command rings low in his ear. It vibrates through him, sending shivers across his skin.

His cheeks tinge pink to match his chapped nose, which is currently running freely onto his upper lip. His hand jerks in Roy’s grip, his brain on autopilot trying to get him to clean himself up. He settles for a desperate sniff, scrunching his nose up in an unsuccessful attempt. He’s so congested he can barely get any air through.

It sets off a new round of tingling, so itchy and persistent that he shakes his head to try and dispel it. His chest expands as his breath stutters and his brain goes pleasantly fuzzy. “heh…ha’EESHHH’OO! Ha’ITTCHH’uh!” The full-bodied sneezes burst from him, showering the salad with a hearty amount of mist. He blinks woozily, catching his breath as they watch it settle.

“Good job,” Roy says, and Jamie’s shoulders melt. He lets Roy shuffle them a step or two over so they’re standing in front of the tray of sushi.

“This next.” Roy taps the tray before moving out of the way.

“Give be a binute, Jesus,” Jamie whines, twin trails of mess clinging to his cupid’s bow. Roy surprises him by blowing a breath of cool air across his nose, and it turns out that, yeah, he really is that ridiculously sensitive right now. “Fu-uhhh-ck…” Jamie fights against it for a moment before remembering their purpose. His nose is stuffed so full right now, he just knows it’s going to be a fucking mess.

Tears spring to his eyes as his nostrils flare, the plaguing itch too intense to control. “Eh…hih…” His chest swells with a gasp before the air is blasted from his lungs – “AEEEISHH’IEW! Huh…Ha’AEEESHUH!” as he barks two huge, wet, cold-laden sneezes down over the waiting food.

It takes him a minute to come back to himself, his breath sounding heavy in his own ears. Roy presses bodily into him, rubbing a reassuring hand across his shoulders.

“Impressive,” he offers, generous with his praise. It only adds to the floaty feeling shimmering through Jamie’s body.

“Christ, look at you. Such a mess.” Roy says, velvety and raw.

Jamie’s face grows hot, humiliatingly conscious of Roy’s scrutiny. He’s sure his face is a disaster. Can feel the remnants of spit and spray all the way past his curved, parted lips down to his chin. He must look like a walking biohazard.

“Roy…” Jamie gives a waterlogged snuffle. “Cadn I have a tissue?”

Roy seems to enjoy Jamie’s struggle to recapture his composure.

“No.” Roy’s fingers clamp over his chin. He brushes a kiss to Jamie’s temple. The gruffness of his voice shoots straight to Jamie’s cock when he says, “I’ll clean you up when we’re done. Right now, I want you messy.”

A soft whine escapes him. “Roy…”

“Such a pretty boy.” Roy’s hand comes down over the back of his neck possessively. “I can’t help but want to see you looking like a right fucking mess sometimes.” His words slink down Jamie’s spine and pool low in his gut.

As Roy moves them further down the line, Jamie’s nose surprises him with a sudden, “hih’EGGSSH’iew!” that mostly ends up glistening on the stainless-steel counter.

“Use your aim, you Muppet. Or do you need me to do everything?” Roy asks with no real heat behind it.

His fingers thread back into Jamie’s frosted tips and he tugs, firmly pulling Jamie’s head back and positioning him right where he wants him - directly over the painstakingly arranged charcuterie board. It really is gorgeous - If Jamie wasn’t feeling so poorly, he’d want to dig in. He braces his arms on the table, his hands finally free of Roy’s hold. Apparently Roy had decided he was trustworthy enough to have his arms back.

“S-sorr-ehh…ha-eh’kkgh’ISHHOO!” The sneeze rockets through him. His muscles tense as he curls forward with the force of it, dousing the food below with a heavy amount of viscous, virulent spray. He moans, catching his breath. That one nearly tore his throat raw. He sags into Roy’s solid form, the achy torment of the past few days starting to catch up with him.

“I almost feel bad for these poor fucks.” Roy says, his arm a firm, comforting presence around Jamie’s waist. “There’s no way they’re not gonna catch this.”

“Mmm,” Jamie hums in response. Resting his fever-warm forehead against Roy’s neck, he sniffs up some of the gunk in his nose, the miserable, squelching sound of it echoing through the room. The bottom half of his face is still in a right state, but he isn’t about to wipe it on Roy’s shirt. He’s being good, and Roy promised he would clean him up after they’re done.

“I bet these fuckers’ll be so smug when they hear our star striker isn’t playing tonight.” Roy smirks. “But they’re gonna find out the hard way that you’re still our secret weapon.” A hand squeezes Jamie’s bicep and gives him an encouraging shake.

Jamie pulls back, his exhausted eyes smiling at Roy, basking in the praise that helps him find his second wind. Roy’s grin is wicked, confident in the success of his plan.

“Ugh, I dodn’t feel good,” Jamie says as he continues to lean on Roy for support.

“Good. Probably means you’re more contagious.” Then he softens. “Just a couple more and we’ll get you out of here.”

Jamie groans but lets himself be pulled along to the next tray made up of various cold cuts and sliced cheeses for sandwiches.

“Get this,” Roy directs, arranging Jamie until he’s directly in front of it. He hardly has to work at all to get another tickle started up. Taking a couple deep sniffs is enough to irritate the sludge that’s packed in his sinuses, begging to be released. His vision goes blurry as the itch builds and builds. His wet nostrils flare as his mouth falls open, his hitching breaths finally reaching a peak. “iihhh- hih’GGKSSHH’IUE!” He’s thrown forward with it, covering the food in an unrestrained torrent, the mist and spit visible as it settles. The dish takes it all.

“Guh…” Jamie leans back, tilting his head back to stop his sinuses from draining down onto the food. The bottom half of his face is a glossy mess. Roy snakes a hand into his hair again and pulls so his throat is exposed.

"You look wrecked...” Roy says, and a needy sound escapes Jamie’s throat. “Love it when you look a wreck for me."

“Roy,” he breathes out.

“I leave for four days and look what a mess you’ve become.” Roy’s teasing voice burns hot in the shell of his ear. “Next time you’re gonna tell me when you’re feeling poorly. Doesn’t matter if I’m clear across the world.”

“Yeah… Yeah, ‘course I will.”

“Promise?”

“Prombise.”

There’s a pause, and Jamie’s eyes search Roy’s face, his throat tight.

“Idt was five days,” he says.

“What?”

“You said you were godne for four days. Idt was five.”

Roy stares at him for a moment, his expression softening. “Counting down the days, were you?” He chuckles, a deep sound that reverberates through Jamie. “Fuck… Love it when you get all needy.”

And really, Jamie can’t help but go all melty at that.

“You gonna let me take care of you when we get home?”

“Uh huh,” he breathes through his mouth.

“There’s a good boy. I’ll handle everything; have you feelin’ better in no time.”

Jamie makes a little sound and curls into Roy for a hug. He feels Roy reach his arms around Jamie’s waist and squeeze him tight.

“Vacation was nice, but I missed your constant yammering in my ear,” Roy says into Jamie’s hair. Jamie laughs weakly – a wet thing that turns into a cough.

“Come on, just one more, then we’ll get you home.” Roy turns them to the tray of silverware laid out at the end of the table. “Finish ‘em off.” He brushes the hair from Jamie’s forehead as he takes in his clearly contagious mess of a face.

Jamie leans forward, willing to do anything Roy says at this point. He can feel a monster of a sneeze building, and tries to sniff through his clogged sinuses to help it along. Nostrils twitching, he rubs the tip of his nose in circles, his hand coming away wet with snot. Fuck, it’s going to feel so good to just get this crud out. “hah… Cobme ond… ihh… huh’IGG’SSHHAH! Hih’ZZSHHHUUHH’UE!” The sneezes shudder through him as he sprays the silverware with all the filth that has built up in his head. Roy holds him steady with an arm around him as they watch it settle, their mission accomplished.

“Good job, babe.” Roy gives his middle a squeeze, looking nearby at the basket of sandwich buns. “I should shove your face in one of these, but I’ll be nice and let you have a tissue. Since you’ve been so good for me.”

Jamie sags into him and groans – in relief, pleasure, exhaustion – he isn’t sure which.

“Oh, you’re so out of it.” Amusement shines in Roy’s eyes, along with a quiet sort of love. “Here, let me.” He grabs a napkin from the pile on the table and gives the bottom of Jamie’s face a cursory wipe before cupping it around his nose. “Blow.”

Jamie obeys, blearily filling the tissue with the muck leftover in his sinuses. It seems to never end. After several blows, he finishes, not quite gasping for breath. He still can’t breathe through his nose, but he feels about a hundred times better than he did a moment ago.

“You may be a mess,” Roy grunts at him, his lip curling up into a smirk. “But you’re my fucking mess.” He kisses Jamie’s forehead and pockets the soggy napkin. Despite the aches in his body, Jamie feels like he’s floating. He’s so gone on Roy, it would almost be pathetic if he wasn’t sure that Roy was equally as obsessed with him.

“Take mbe hombe?” Jamie asks, hand skimming down Roy’s arm to toy with his fingers. Roy threads them together.

“Of course, love. Let’s go,” he says before pulling Jamie along, leading the way as they make their escape into the echoing halls of the club.

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

IOTA Reviews: Transmission and Deflagration (The Kwamis' Choice)

Well, it only took until almost halfway through the fifth season, but we're finally getting a two-part episode that isn't a season finale. There have been a few episodes I think could have benefited from having an extra part, like “Cat Blanc”. So obviously, after all this time, there has to be a reason for putting a two-parter here. The story told here has to be big. It has to be huge. It has to be something that will alter the very way we see the plot and these characters, and—it's more Love Square stuff. God dammit...

Let's get into the tenth and eleventh episodes of Miraculous Ladybug's fifth season: Transmission and Deflagration

“Transmission” starts with Marinette having another depressive episode, which seems to be worse than usual, with her offering her Miraculous to Tikki so she can choose someone else. While Tikki tries to remind her of all the good she's done as Ladybug as footage from earlier episodes plays, Marinette points out how she's a terrible Ladybug, once again referencing how she lost the Miraculous because of her feelings for Adrien.

Tikki: You’re overreacting, Marinette!

Marinette: Really? Then, how come I lost the Miraculous I was entrusted with all because of love? Love only ever causes problems. I’ll never fall in love again! Love is weak! And I can’t be sad about it; otherwise, I might get akumatized!

Okay, this is just getting ridiculous. We're ten episodes into the season, and whenever Marinette brings up her failure at the end of the last season, it's the same song and dance: She feels guilty about it, she needs someone to try and make her feel better, and she doesn't change anything about the way she and Cat Noir operate. If it isn't that, it's a complete strawman or character who we know already hates Ladybug like Chloe or Lila calling out Marinette for her failure specifically so any negative feedback she gets can be easily brushed aside. The whole point of a hero having to comprehend a major failure is to see how they deal with the consequences to their actions and find a way to improve to make sure nothing like that ever happens again. If Marinette came up with new ways to strategize with Cat Noir, or seriously reevaluate the way she sees Adrien that isn't just brushed aside, I'd get it. Instead, all she does is whine about how much her life sucks over and over, which is the same problem I've had with Adrien for the past few seasons.

And once again, for a show with the lyrics “The power of love always so strong” in its opening, it seems like the writers want to make a bigger point in favor of showing how love can only ruin things. Yes, getting emotional can cause someone to make more impulsive decisions, but at the same time, feelings of love and kindness can get good results, like Ellen Ripley's maternal instincts motivating her to save Newt in Aliens. The problem is that we never get a lot of arguments as to how love can benefit the heroes, not only when we see how much it screws up Ladybug and Cat Noir's partnership, but once again, how Marinette's romantic feelings for someone led to her greatest failure. The closest we get to an argument in favor of love is whenever Marinette and Adrien's friends try to make their OTP come together without considering if it would actually make things better or not.

Speaking of which, after the episode's obligatory pointless Chloe line that's only there so Selah Victor can pay her rent that week, Ms. Bustier asks Alya to deliver Marinette's homework to her, only for Nino to convince her to have Adrien do it instead. Somehow, she thinks this minor favor will help Marinette and Adrien realize their true feelings for each other. Because it's not like Alya learned that she shouldn't choose who she thinks Marinette would be best with last episode, right?

Marinette and Adrien talk and it seems like they're starting to grow a little closer, but Tikki and Plagg panic, trying to intervene so they don't know each other's identities. The attempt fails, but Marinette kicks Adrien out anyway. It's a pretty somber scene, so let's cut to something stupid instead, like Marinette and Adrien's classmates throwing a party under the assumption that Adrien simply delivering something to Marinette means they'll get together now.

All of you are really gunning for the Biggest Idiot Award today, aren't you?

Of course, even though she went along with one of these weird “force Marinette to do something she doesn't want to” schemes before in “Crocoduel”, Zoe seems to be the only one with a smidgen of common sense.

Zoe: Alya, did you hear Marinette’s voicemail message?

Alya: Yeah, but that was before, Zoe.

Zoe: “Before”? Before what?

Alya: Before when Marinette was a complete wreck.

Nino: But Alya sends her the perfect mechanic.

Alya: Adrien!

Nino: He’s fixing her up as we speak.

Rose: Wow! When they come back to school, they’ll finally be an item!

Marc: A perfect plan!

Zoe: But... you guys don’t actually know for sure.

Alya: Trust me. This is it this time!

I'm starting to think that maybe Marinette should reconsider who she chooses to be temp heroes once she gets the Miraculous back.

Adrien starts crying as he leaves Marinette's place, which attracts the attention of Monarch... who then immediately backs out as soon as he senses him, transforming back into Gabriel. Meanwhile, Tikki and Plagg discuss Marinette and Adrien's situation.

Plagg: Sugarcube! Having to force them to choose between love and their mission is just awful! Maybe Master Fu was wrong to choose them.

Tikki: No, they’re made for each other. Love is what gives them their strength.

Plagg: But the impossible part of that love is destroying them, and I know a thing or two about destruction.

Tikki: (sighs heavily) What can we do?

Plagg: We must free them of that impossible choice. We must... free them of us.

Yep. This is the titular Kwamis' choice. They seriously think that Marinette and Adrien's romantic problems are more important than them being superheroes, so their best option is to just take away their Miraculous even though Monarch still has fifteen more of them. I'd be more forgiving if this was towards the beginning of Marinette and Adrien's superhero careers, but this is Season 5, where the stakes have never been higher thanks to Monarch's arsenal. Oh yeah, I also forgot to mention that MARINETTE IS STILL THE FUCKING GUARDIAN, AND TAKING AWAY HER MIRACULOUS DOESN'T CHANGE A THING! IT'S NEVER EVEN MENTIONED IN EITHER EPISODE, SO HOW THE HELL DO YOU FORGET SOMETING THAT IMPORTANT?!?!

It doesn't even make sense that only now are Tikki and Plagg against Marinette and Adrien actually getting together when they were never shown to have any problems with it in earlier seasons, and just last episode, Plagg encouraged Adrien to go after Marinette after doing so as Cat Noir didn't work out. It comes across as the writers struggling to come up with new ways to have opposition to the Love Square, even if this idea somehow leads to a minuscule amount of progress in that department. Yeah, you figure that out...

Also, it's pretty weird how after four and a half seasons of Marinette suffering from the burden of being Ladybug, only now does Tikki decide to relieve her of that responsibility, but only because of how it affects her love life.

We get another scene showing how stupid Marinette and Adrien's friends are as they talk about how happy Marinette and Adrien must be now, interspersed with scenes of Marinette and Adrien crying their eyes out. Just like that one scene in “Evolution”, I don't get the setup. Is this meant to be a joke, or a serious moment? After Nathalie takes a call for Adrien telling Nino that he can't be bothered at the moment, Gabriel comes into the room to comfort him, giving him an Alliance ring in the process.

Tikki and Plagg talk to their respective holders and tell them how they feel that the burden of being heroes is crushing them. Marinette and Adrien obviously bring up the situation with Monarch, but as soon as their Kwamis mention that not being superheroes means that they can pursue their love lives with no stress, they immediately take off their Miraculous and give them back. After five seasons that this episode confirmed happened just under a year, and this is what causes them to give up their Miraculous: a bad case of heartache. We're supposed to see this as the breaking point that causes the two to not want to be superheroes ever again? They don't consider the innocent lives that could be in danger, or the fact that this heavy burden will most likely be forced on two new and inexperienced schmucks who will struggle even more than they did thanks to Monarch possessing powers of the other fifteen Miraculous.

I'm sorry, but I don't see this as an emotional scene. All I see is what I saw with Adrien in “Kuro Neko”: these characters simply giving up because of how much they're prioritizing their personal feelings over the lives of others. If this was something Marinette and Adrien came up with and made an agreement to quit at the same time (even choosing their own replacements), I'd sort of get it, as they'd at least be on the same terms, but neither of them ever learn the other quit until later on in the episode.

After Adrien breaks down even more, we learn that the whole reason Gabriel hesitated to akumatize Adrien the last time was because he didn't have an Alliance ring on, so now that he does, he's taking a mulligan. However, the Akuma is stopped at the last minute when Adrien sees the homework he was supposed to give Marinette, so he runs off as his negative emotions fade. Instead, Monarch chooses to akumatize someone else with five different Alliance rings.

Monarch: Rejoice, dear Kwamis! Five Alliances enables as many Miraculous powers to transfer at the same time! This villain promises to be exceptional! (laughs manically)

Pretty sure you hyped up Style Queen the same way three seasons ago, yet you still didn't get the Miraculous then, so I wouldn't gloat too soon.

The next scene with Marinette and Adrien is actually a really nice one. Marinette starts stuttering as usual when she tries to talk, but Adrien comes up with another idea: He'll ask a series of yes or no questions, and Marinette can raise her right or left hand to answer them. Adrien asks Marinette about her feelings for him, and Marinette accidentally answers no before changing her mind. Before Adrien leaves, he asks Marinette if she wants to spend more time with him in the future, to which she accepts. This scene was handled really well, and nothing really felt forced here.

Back with Alya, she and the others are once again coming up with a plan to get Marinette and Adrien together (because none of them have lives outside of the Love Square, I guess), when Nora suddenly calls.

Nora: Geez, sis! You never pick up the phone when I like, actually need your advice!

Alya: I couldn’t pick up. I’m at school!

Nora: Yeah, right. So, you see, I had no choice but to deal with it myself.

Alya: Oh, no... Nora. I told you before, you gotta talk before you act!

Nora: Yeah, but I did talk, like, I said stuff in front of Kouki's bros.

Alya: Nora! Not “talk” like that!

Yeah, outside of a few references to Nora trying to call Alya earlier in the episode, I didn't skip anything here. We're just thrown into this plot with little to no explanation as to what's going. What Nora and this Kouki guy were arguing about, much less what Nora said to his friends is never explained. I don't even known if they're supposed to be in a relationship or not. It's not like in “Sandboy” or “Oblivio” where the motivation for how the person got akumatized was only explained near the end of the episode. The episode acts like we're supposed to know who Kouki is and why he and Nora are fighting when this is the first time Kouki has ever appeared on this show.

As the conversation goes on, Tikki chooses Alya to be the new wielder of the Ladybug Miraculous and Plagg chooses Zoe to be the new wielder of the Cat Miraculous. Okay, outside of Zoe being the only one in this episode who isn't a complete idiot, I can see why Plagg would choose her, since she has experience as a superhero, and her identity wasn't exposed. As for Tikki choosing Alya? Yeah, Alya did a good job as Scarabella in “Hack-San”, but she doesn't mention that A) She and Cat Noir still needed Marinette's help to stop Robustus, and B) Alya's already had her identity exposed twice, to the point where she was the one to suggest she not be trusted with one before Marinette lost the other fifteen Miraculous at the end of the last season. Alya's not a bad hero, but these factors don't exactly make her an ideal successor to Ladybug. Also, it's pretty dumb how the whole reason Marinette and Adrien quit was for romantic reasons, yet the whole reason Alya blew her cover last season was for romantic reasons (Rocketear).

Back with Adrien and Marinette, the former plans to leave, but is interrupted by the akumatized form of Kouki, named Kikou.

Kikou's design is... I mean, it's not terrible, I guess? Putting aside the fact that this is the second Akuma in the series to go with the “black boxer” stereotype (who is also a dumb brute like Anansi was), the gold jewelry is a decent touch, and it makes sense that he has the five Alliance rings to show off his wealth. As for his powers, because he has five rings, he has five different powers, the Tiger Miraculous' Clout to power his Gum-Gum Pistol-esque punches, the Turtle Miraculous' Shelter to protect his head where the Akuma is obviously hiding, the Horse Miraculous' Voyage to move around quickly and make up for his size hindering his speed, the Ox Miraculous' Resistance to protect the aforementioned Shelter, and the Mouse Miraculous' Multitude to clone himself with. This is the Akuma that really made me realize that the gimmick of every Akuma this season having the powers of whatever Miraculous Monarch gives them is just an excuse to half-ass writing any new Akuma powers in favor of the same fifteen abilities the other Miraculous have.

Kikou attacks the city, but Alya transforms into Scarabella, soon being joined by Zoe, AKA, Kitty Noire.

Kitty Noire's design is... pretty weird, all things considered. The green lipsick just doesn't look that good, I don't get the green hair extensions, and why are they eyes like that when even Lady Noire's eyes stayed green? At the very least, the hair looks marginally better than Catwalker's, and I like the detailing on the suit itself.

While Scarabella and Kitty Noire quickly get to know each other, Marinette and Adrien get used to being civilians again pretty quickly as they watch them fight off Kikou, the two new heroes struggling to keep up with Kikou's five Miraculous powers. Of course, Marinette and Adrien only look mildly concerned, not even regretting their choices in the slightest.

Our heroes, ladies and gentlemen.

Scarabella uses her Lucky Charm, getting a parachute, which is totally different from the kind used in the final episode of the first episode. Scarabella and Kitty Noire taunt Kikou, Scarabella drawing Kikou's fire while Kitty Noire recruits a bunch of firefighters, who then get some paint from the art store Socqueline runs. The firefighters then load the paint into their truck's hose, which is then used to fill up the parachute. Kitty Noire cuts the rope, and the paint blinds Kikou, and as soon as he deactivates his shield, Scarabella breaks his headgear, freeing the Akuma.

Scarabella de-evilizes the Akuma, sort of helps Kouki and Nora make up, uses Miraculous Scarabella to fix all the damage, while Marinette and Adrien compliment the new heroes from afar before promising to meet up at school tomorrow.

The first episode ends with Gabriel's Alliance recording the unusual data in two Alliances, meaning that Scarabella and Kitty Noire's identities have already been exposed... even though Tikki should have known this since “Jubiliation”. Yeah, you all know where this is going.

THE BIGGEST IDIOT OF THE EPISODE IS... TIKKI

While the competition was tough, Tikki was able to get the win for going along with this asinine plan in the first place that prioritized the personal feelings of two people over the fact that Monarch was at his most dangerous. Not only that, she forgot Marinette was still the Guardian, she forgot that Alya's identity was already exposed twice, and that even if she didn't know the Alliance rings were a front for Monarch's plan, forgot that these hi-tech rings track the everyday movements of its users, not even telling Plagg this before he chose Zoe.

The second part, “Deflagration”, immediately starts off with Kitty Noire saying that Ladybug and Cat Noir have nothing to feel guilty about even though they essentially abandoned Paris when Ladybug was shown to be getting backlash for her failure, but of course, that isn't mentioned here.

Kitty Noire: We’ll accomplish our mission just like they did, because the goal we all share is to defeat Monarch, isn't it?

News Reporter: Or perhaps Ladybug and Cat Noir renounced their mission so they could finally live their love story?

Scarabella: They were never in love or in a relationship, and neither are we.

Kitty Noire: (in a flirtatious tone) So far anyway!

I'd make a “The Ambiguously Gay Duo” joke here, but we all know Alya is already in a relationship.

Alya and Marinette meet up, the former congratulating her successor on another great job. The two talk about Adrien, and Alya once again encourages Marinette to focus more on pursuing a relationship with him, no doubt planning another stupid party in her mind.

We then get a scene that actually reminds the audience that Chloe and Zoe are supposed to be sisters. I understand if you might have forgotten, but don't worry. I'm pretty sure the writers did too. Of course, I think the writers might be running out of new ways to make Chloe mean to someone, because this time, she just yells at Zoe for being near her and not being in the “half-of-a-sister zone”. In order to appease her sister and make sure she doesn't call their mom, Zoe offers to wash all of Chloe's shoes. Plagg talks to Zoe about possibly standing up to her sister.

Plagg: How about I Catacylsm that sister of yours instead?

Zoe: It’s pointless, Plagg.

Plagg: Zoe, you can't let them treat you that way; no one speaks to me like that! Just ask the T-rexes... That is, if you can find one! Because they're not so smug anymore now, are they?

Zoe: It’s best to stay out of trouble in this family if I'm going to protect my secret identity.

Plagg: You start by giving up cheese, and then you end up giving up on dignity, freedom, and justice!

Zoe: I feel like you like to blow things out of proportion, don't you?

Plagg: Yes... especially when I’m starving.

Talking about standing up to your mean sister, contemplating murder while casually discussing genocide. Same thing, right?

We cut to Gabriel, who's over the moon about the recent revelation regarding Scarabella and Kitty Noire, even dancing a little. He tells Nathalie and heads to his lair to plan his next scheme, but not before chatting with Emilie's body once again. Gabriel transforms into Monarch and gives himself the powers of the Bee, Mouse, Rooster, Ox, and Horse Miraculous, traveling to the school himself.

Meanwhile, we cut to the Resistance, where we see Max has set up a system where, through the use of the Alliance rings and their phones, the members can alert the school to whenever there's an active Akuma... even though one of the features included in the Alliance includes an Akuma alert (Multiplication), and there's also been an Akuma alarm since Season 2 (Riposte). So once again, this brave and totally important Resistance has contributed absolutely nothing. Okay, there are some other parts, like some of the members planning to fight off the Akuma with paintball guns if there's no other option. You know, this is proof that this show takes place in France, because if this was America, they would most likely have actual guns.

At lunch, Marinette and Adrien get closer, to which Lila uses as an opportunity to manipulate Chloe into trying to break up the moment, but not before we get a joke where Chloe needs Alliance to define the word “generous”. Okay, I'm not sure if the joke was that Chloe is so selfish, she doesn't know the meaning of the word, or if the writers are now resorting to using “dumb blonde” jokes for Chloe now, which totally isn't a cliche that was overused twenty years ago to the point where there was an entire movie starring Reese Witherspoon made to subvert it. Either way, NOT FUNNY, DIDN'T LAUGH.

Chloe tries to ruin the moment by telling Adrien Marinette is in love with him, but he's not having any of that. She tries telling jokes that are supposed to be unfunny, they're funny, but it lacks the charm of something like Hank Hill attempting to tell “yo mama” jokes. Zoe stands up to Chloe, which pisses her off so much, she willingly accepts an Akuma from Monarch (currently invisible thanks to the Rooster Miraculous), turning into Sole Destroyer.

Sole Destroyer is... wow... Just... WOW... they didn't even try with this one. At least Miracle Queen made sense as an upgrade to Queen Wasp, but this? They literally just took Sole Crusher, whose design resembling Chloe made sense thematically in that episode, gave her a new pair of sunglasses, some more gemstones and spikes, and made her eyes glow as if she was a character in an episode of The Nostalgia Critic. Why go to this effort to make a new Akuma when so little is done with the new design? Wouldn't it make sense to bring back Antibug, given Chloe has been against Ladybug since the end of Season 3? As for Sole Destroyer's powers, it's just Sole Crusher's magic kicks, only instead of growing bigger in size after absorbing each victim and making her more of a threat, they transform into singing shoes. You know, guys, it just dawned on me how... how weird this show is. Kinda goofy...

Alya and Zoe attempt to transform, but Monarch, using a combination of the Mouse, Bee, and Rooster Miraculous' powers, stuns the two and steals the Ladybug and Cat Miraculous from them. Plagg attempts to Cataclysm Monarch, but Monarch uses Resistance to block it, immediately going to unify. Before the process can be completed, both Tikki and Plagg use Lucky Charm and Cataclysm respectively, Tikki summoning a trash can with the side effect of creating a new Eiffel Tower, and Plagg destroying the Cat Miraculous. Doing so ends up creating an endless cycle of things being created and destroyed, and unlike in “Dearest Family”, they don't reuse footage from “Style Queen”.

Marinette gets the trash can, and realizes what's happening, and while Adrien and Nino plan to have the Resistance try and stop Sole Destroyer, Marinette works on making her own Ladybug costume. Monarch orders Tikki to tell him what the hell's going on, Tikki explains that since Plagg destroyed the Cat Miraculous, he lost his only method of communicating with the physical plane, and all Monarch needs to do to get what he needs is to take back the Lucky Charm Tikki created. Just then, Marinette arrives, dressed up as Ladybug, and seemingly having the Lucky Charm in her hands, only for Monarch to steal it, unifying into Monarbug.

Given how stupid he looked as Shadow Noir last season, it's not exactly surprising to learn that Gabriel looks just as stupid unified with the Ladybug. The red and black polka dots just don't go with the black and purple. The one thing I'll give them credit for is that the eyes look kind of cool.

The Lucky Charm turns out to be a fake, and Nino jumps in to save Marinette from being hit with Venom. The rest of the Resistance also arrives, somehow having beaten up Sole Destroyer off-screen and turning her into a battering ram. Monarbug undoes the Akumatization, but Rose, Ivan, and Kim dogpile Monarbug, leaving Adrien to steal back the Ladybug Miraculous for Marinette.

Marinette transforms back into Ladybug, and uses Miraculous Ladybug to fix the damage and fix the Cat Miraculous. While Ladybug fights Monarch, she learns that he reforged the Miraculous before Monarch uses Multitude and Voyage to make his escape, swearing that he'll beat Ladybug someday, “We'll meet again, Spider-Man”, yadda yadda yadda.

Tikki and Marinette talk about finding new holders, only for Marinette to choose to take back the Miraculous, figuring that since Monarch doesn't know their identities (once again forgetting what the Alliance rings can do), that's the best option. Plagg takes back the Cat Miraculous and goes to say goodbye to Zoe, reassuring her that she was still brave enough to stand up to Chloe, because I guess to hell with the people who somehow managed to restrain Chloe while she was Sole Destroyer. And so this episode, and by extension, this two-parter, ends with Ladybug and Cat Noir talking about how their Kwamis saved the day... even though they were the reason Monarch almost won in the first place.

THE BIGGEST IDIOT OF THE EPISODE IS... CHLOE

In addition to somehow not knowing the definition of the word “generous”, she failed to come up with a good comeback against Marinette, chose to get akumatized to get revenge, failed at that, betrayed Sabrina and Lila, her only allies, for no good reason, and somehow got defeated off-screen by a bunch of civilians with no superpowers, not even getting to fight either of the new heroes, including her sister.

But yeah, in case you can't tell, these episodes were pretty bad. The entire premise of Tikki and Plagg deciding that Marinette and Adrien's love lives were more important than stopping Monarch was a hard pill to swallow, especially since their replacements didn't get to do anything outside of a single Akuma fight. You'd think that with the buildup Zoe got standing up to Chloe, she'd at least play a role in stopping Sole Destroyer, but instead, she and Alya are benched for almost the entirety of “Deflagration”. It's also really dumb that the ending tried to make them out to be the MVP's of the fight, when their idea was what caused Monarch to almost get the Miraculous.

Even Marinette and Adrien didn't really make a lot of progress here. All they did was talk a little, but even after “Deflagration”, not much else happened. Yeah, Adrien stood up for Marinette, but they still haven't officially started dating yet, even when they had every reason to after giving up their Miraculous. It's still better than nothing, but after four and a half seasons, I think we're allowed to want a little more development with the Love Square Wouldn't it have been interesting to see Marinette and Adrien try to start a relationship during their brief retirement, only to struggle to maintain it after becoming superheroes again? We're almost halfway through the season, and the Love Square is still progressing at a snail's pace. Then again, I guess it's better than nothing at this point.

“Transmission” was pretty boring, all things considered. Other than the first act, nothing really happened. The Akuma fight was like the others, just with two new heroes, and Marinette and Adrien got to bond for a few minutes. Nora and Kouki's drama wasn't interesting, and it wasn't even properly explained like the motivations of other Akumas.

I will say that “Deflagration” was the better of the two, if only because Marinette, Adrien, and Gabriel made some smart choices here. Unlike in “Evolution” and “Destruction”, there's no gloating or wasting time. Monarch cuts straight to the chase, and Marinette comes up with a quick plan to trick him with. Also, while I still don't really care about the Resistance, I like the idea of the civilians standing up to Monarch, and think it was executed better than it was in “Heroes' Day”. Even Sole Destroyer got a few reactions out of me for how exaggerated her facial expressions were. I don't know why they decided to give her One Piece levels of weird faces, but kudos to the animators on that front. Of course, Sole Destroyer was still one of the most pointless Akumas in the show's history, as you could take her out of the episode and nothing would have changed.

Overall, while I appreciate the effort to try and tell bigger stories, this was a really weird choice of an episode to make a two-parter.

[into-crazy]

celebrating your birthday with Pennywise headcanons

Warnings- none, it's pretty much fun and fluff, ages 18+

Pennywise doesn't really get or understand the concept of celebrating birthdays.

"Why do humans do this, y/n? What makes it so special?"

You'd just have to try your best at explaining the whole concept to him. He tries to grasp an understanding of it, but he finds it quite meaningless.

The only things he believes should be of importance are the basics for survival. Which to him consists of eating, sleeping, and mating. Everything else seems rather pointless to him.

However, he makes the effort of learning much more about it now. Since you've brought up the fact that your birthday was coming up soon. Concepts which seem to have significance to you, he tries his best to acknowledge them.

After all, you're his favorite little earthling and he really wants to make you happy.

He'd curiously ask you, "so what do you want to do for your date of birth, pretty one?"

"Oh, well I don't know. I don't have anything planned." You'd tell him.

He's beyond ecstatic to hear that, because he can arrange something for you. Light bulbs flash around in his mind like the deadlights.

Pennywise will raid the birthday/party section at your local store. Anything that catches his attention, he'll grab. He ends up with a large pile of items which he stashes in a hidden spot back at his lair.

You notice that his attitude has been extra bubbly lately. It's because he is very excited and can't wait to surprise you.

On the morning of your birthday, he will get everything set up before you even wake up. It doesn't take him too long. He's pretty fast and he will also just figure things out on his own.

Once you wake up, you are instantly greeted with Pennywise grinning above you. Those big blue eyes sparkling into yours.

"Happy day of birth y/n!"

"Aw, thanks Penny."

Because he is so impatient, he practically drags you out of bed and into the living room. Guiding you the entire way with his large hands covering your eyes.

He removes his hands once you're there. "SURPRISE!"

Immediately, you're amazed by the sight before you. There are about four 'Happy Birthday' banners hung up on the walls. Lots of red balloons floating around- courtesy of Pennywise. Party hats scattered in various places like little decorations. Streamers zigzagging right under the ceiling. And colorful tablecloth laid out on the table, with a bunch of stuff on top.

While you take it all in, Pennywise quickly dresses you in a birthday sash and a little crown.

On the table, you find a birthday cake with candles that are already lit. Along with plates and napkins for the occasion. There was also a small pile of gifts made up with things you like and random party favors.

"Do you like it?"

"Oh Penny, I love it- all of it! Thank you so much!"

Pennywise is satisfied to hear that you like everything. Gives you a big wet smooch and a huge warm hug.

You struggle with trying to put one of the party hats on his large head. The string of the article nearly snaps on the poor clown. But you manage to get it on since he likes to feel included.

He ushers you to the cake and sings "Happy Birthday" to you. In fact, he's taken the time to learn and practice the lyrics so he could get it right.

Urges you to hurry up when blowing out the candles because he really wants some cake.

"Go on, make your wish! Blow 'em out, blow 'em out, blow 'em out!"

First Penny cuts out a neat slice for you, then proceeds to devour the rest of the cake. There won't be any left, so don't expect seconds.

You receive a variety of birthday cards with his name signed in every single one. Some of them, it was hard to tell whether he actually read them or if he just swiped them up.

Some honorable mentions include: 'Happy birthday to my ride or die. Love you bunches! -Pennywise' // 'Cheers to you for another trip around the sun! -Pennywise' // 'Happy birthday to my favorite person in the world! -Pennywise'

All of the messages in the cards make you laugh and smile. He's ridiculous, but you love him though.

After such a chaotic start, the rest of the day is left entirely up to you. He will happily do whatever you want to do, since it is your day.

Watch a movie while cuddling.. go out and do something fun.. sit and stare at each other for hours.. Literally anything, you name it.

Spending your birthday with Pennywise was absolutely perfect. You couldn't have wished for anything better.

[miela]

Shattered Memories • Chapter VI: Two Spiders, One Sorceress • {Peter Parker x Stark!Reader}

Chapter Genre: Fluff Chapter Warnings: I know i said updates on Fridays but I'm clearly not a truther / pov is so ambiguous in here I'm so sorry Extra: Make sure to check out the Playlist and Pin Board!

Masterlist

↪ divider by firefly-graphics

The rest of the car ride was small talk and life updates to each other. You talked about your days at work and your lack of a social life and Peter talked about his days at school, work, and the shit he sees on patrols. Once you guys got to the place you both sat down at a booth. It was a small sandwich shop that Peter recognized but had never been inside of. 

You took off your jacket and folded it next to you. Peter looked at the tattoos on your inner forearm that caught his attention. Three arc reactors inked down your arm with the words "Proof that Tony Stark has a Heart". There were words with each arc reactor and blue roses blooming around them. You noticed Peter studying the tattoo.

"It gives me strength," you smiled and extended your arm to show him more of the unique tattoo. They were the three different arc reactors that Tony had made, each with different designs but all correlating together in a perfect trifecta. 

“It’s pretty,” Peter smiled. 

“Thanks,” you smiled back and moved your arm back to its place on the table. “What about you? Any ink?”

“Nah,” he responded. “Not yet anyways,”

“Have any ideas of what you want?” 

“I have some but nothing really hashed out just yet. I’m kinda worried about getting one. It’ll be easier to identify me that way,” he explained.

“Huh,” you had an expression of realization and deep thought. “That’s actually a really good concern.”

After ordering your food you guys talk a little bit to get to know each other better. You found out about his favorite movies and that he likes skateboarding sometimes. He learned that you still play guitar, you picked up on lyrical and contemporary dance, and that Morgan liked to bully you. It was a sweet conversation of you relearning about him and him learning more about you.

Peter felt like it was a strange power dynamic where he had to upper hand, and he didn't like it. But it balances out with you knowing so much information about him from your month-long deep dive.

“I noticed that your style is different than before,” Peter commented. “You got this whole badass leading lady movie character thing going on.”

You chuckled in response and sipped your lemonade. “Some of it is from Natasha, others from Wanda, and most from my friend Celina’s ThredUp,” you explained. “Secretly though. If she knew I bought the stuff she would be like ‘I could’ve just given it to you!’ even though I can very much afford it.”

Peter perked up at Celina’s name. It's been a while since he last saw her due to her being at the Sanctum Sanctorum. You noticed how Peter reacted to hearing her name. 

“She needed money for equipment and I couldn’t just let her give me her things that she was trying to sell to get the money for it," you continued.

“Equipment?” Peter asked.

“Mhm,” you hummed. “She’s got a YouTube Channel and a Podcast about Mythology and Folklore and stuff like that.”

Peter looked at you confused. YouTube is one thing but a Podcast? Did she work with someone else who does the talking?

“What?” You asked before realizing it with wide eyes. “Oh, shit! You have no idea, do you? She can talk now.”

Peter’s heart nearly stopped.

“She…can speak?” 

“Yeah! She’s a chatterbox and can talk to you for hours. She’s great company. She's also the kind to have life-changing conversations.”

Peter thought back on how he remembered Celina. A quiet girl with a personality loud enough to brighten a room. Her straight forehead bangs never blocked out the shine in her eyes when she was excited about something and her usual academic style of black turtlenecks, sweater vests, and plaid pleated tennis skirts contrasted her bright persona. Although she was a stellar student herself, she was also very creative and loved creating artful things. 

She knew sign language. Peter learned it with her so she could better communicate with him. Uncle Ben and Aunt May had done the same so they could understand her. Ned, Michelle, and you had eventually learned it too so Peter didn't always have to worry about translating if he wasn't around. 

He remembers when people actually thought Celina was deaf, and a group of kids were making fun of her. You stepped in and told them all to go fuck themselves. That is actually how you and Celina met and became friends.

“Do you wanna go see her?” you asked knocking Peter from his thoughts.

He blinked. “Like…right now?” 

“Yeah!" You chirped, took out your phone, and started typing. "I can ask her if she’s home.” you chewed your lip. "How do you feel about getting a reading?"

"A reading?" Peter asked a bit confused.

"Like fortune telling, tarot reading, all that," you explained. "Celina does all that."

Peter shrugged. "Sure."

Celina~

Hey (Y/N/N)! What’s up?

Are you busy?

No not at all, I’m just kinda hanging out with the furbabies~

I want you to meet a friend of mine who needs a reading.

Oh? Does it happen to be complicated guy?

You note that Peter has several different nicknames from people.

Yes, but things are…less complicated now.

OMG, that’s good to hear! Okay yeah! I’ll get set up! See you soon! 

“She’s down,” you smiled. 

Once you guys arrive you park outside of her apartment building and wait for her to text you when she’s ready for you to come up. The top is up on your convertible giving you and Peter more privacy. You had the music on low and the windows tinted. 

“So since I don’t remember jack shit,” you began. “How do you know Celina?”

Peter took a deep breath and turned to you slightly.

“Both of our parents were killed at the Stark Expo. We were stranded together when it happened and when they found us standing over the bodies of our dead parents…it was like so weird trauma bond that we had at the moment and she took my hand. We were put in a daycare for lost children until Uncle Ben and Aunt May came to get me...and I couldn’t just leave her there, she didn’t have any other family. They were kind enough to take her in as well and we were raised as cousins or siblings.”

You nod listening. “I’m sorry about your parents." You look down at your hands in your lap. "That’s really heartbreaking.”

“It’s okay. I’ve made peace with it.”

You both sat in a peaceful silence for a moment before Peter spoke again.

“You mentioned earlier that Celina can have life-changing conversations," Peter stated. "After all the shit we've seen as Avengers, I'm curious to know what you mean."

You smiled and leaned your head on your hand as your elbow sat on the steering wheel. "She got me to stop hating magic."

"What?!" Peter asked in a high-pitched voice. "Bullshit."

"I'm serious!"

"Okay, who are you and what did you do with (Y/N) Stark?" Peter chuckled softly. "Miss (Y/N) 'magic has limitations, science has solutions' Stark?"

You laughed. "No seriously hear me out."

"I'm all ears."

"Alright, check this out, you ready?"

"I swear to god if you conjure something up or have a sling ring, I'm gonna believe you're not really who you say you are," Peter laughed.

"Fuck no," you exclaimed. "Never."

"Okay, okay," Peter sat back and crossed his arms giving you his full attention. 

"Magic is just undiscovered or misunderstood science," You stated. "Celina's words."

Peter thought on the words for a second and let the words bounce around in his head. "Okay, I can see that, yeah," he looks at you with squinted eyes.  "But has she ever met Wanda?" 

You both laughed. 

"No, but she trained with Sorcerers." 

"Okay, fair point."

Peter thought about how that conversation went down with you and Celina. Celina has always been interested in Magic, Occult, and Mythological things. It was a hobby of hers and she loved watching Movies and shows that surrounded those things. He remembered when she showed Him and Ned someone on YouTube who talks about conspiracy theories.

Speaking of…

"Did she and Ned ever get together?"

"Yep, four years now."

“Really?” Peter chuckled. "Finally. They liked each other since the 3rd grade."

“I know right?” You replied. "Oh yeah, they're engaged as of recently too"

"Huh?!" Peter squeaked. 

"Yep!"

"Jeez, I missed so much." 

“You have no idea,” you gave him a lopsided grin.

He smiled and looked up at the apartment building for a moment. This all seemed like some weird dream. It was as if this day wasn’t real. You guys went out and spent time together, sang to your love song, and now he’s here ready to remeet Celina after five years of not seeing her. You must have noticed him staring or sensed his emotions.

"If it's too much too soon we can wait," you said. "I know it's a lot at once."

Peter sighed still looking at the building and shook his head. " It's been 5 years and it's long overdue." He looked at you and smiled softly. "I'll be fine"

Celina then texted you and told you that she was ready for you guys to go up, and so you did. The only issue is that she lived on the 11th floor and the elevator was broken. She could’ve easily sling ring portal you guys in, but considering you both are web slingers, you would do just fine. 

“Man, I haven’t swung in a while,” You say to yourself looking up.

Peter’s mouth spoke before his brain made a thought. “I could web us up there,”

“Y-You sure?” you asked a little sheepishly.

Peter nodded with a smile. “We’ve done it before.”

“Okay, Parker,” you bounced on your feet a little like you were preparing yourself for high-intensity movement. Peter found it cute. 

You walked over to him and clasped your hands around his neck. Your senses were buzzing at the closeness of you two. Peter’s mind was buzzing just as much. 

“Here let me just…” he trailed off as he lifted you off the ground and your legs around his torso. 

You yelped softly at his actions. You looked down at him with wide eyes and a face on fire. You could feel his muscles through his shirt and it was messing with your head. And you were so close to his face. His extremely cute and handsome face. You could smell his body spray. Sandalwood and Vanilla. You decided it was your favorite scent. He was warm and you couldn’t tell if it was from the fact that men are naturally warmer or the fact that he was blushing profusely. He looked at you gingerly as he wrapped an arm around you. You could feel his biceps and you had to shut your mind up before you drove yourself insane. You smiled softly in response and nodded.

 “I’m ready,” you said softly.

“O-okay,” He squeaked. God, he’s so cute.

Next thing you know you’re both being lifted off the ground. You hang onto him tightly and lean your head on the side of his as you close your eyes. You could feel his silky curls on your cheek and you were beaming at how soft they were. You wanted to shove your whole face in his hair. 

Peter decided that he liked you holding on to him like this because of how close you both were. 

He landed on the 11th floor gracefully to his surprise because of how his mind was racing with you being wrapped around him and in his arm. You looked at each other longingly for a moment as your eyes shifted down to his soft pink lips and his shifted down to your lipstick-stained ones a few times. 

You were knocked out of your moment when you heard the door next to you open and you reflex and jumped from his hold with ease. You both acted awkwardly and naturally as two children ran out of the doorway and down the hall giggling, not caring about your or Peter’s presence there. You guys stood in silence for a moment processing what just happened. 

“We should…you know.” You began with an awkward smile.

“No, yeah, yeah, we should…you know,” Peter responded in the same manner as he rubbed the back of his neck. 

“Yeah!”

“Mhm!”

And with that, you walked towards Celina’s door quickly and ahead of Peter as your face burned and a big grin appeared on your face. Little did you know that Peter was also smiling from behind you. 

Once you reached the door, you rang the doorbell.

“Um…” You looked at him. “Are you ready?”

“I-I think so,” He smiled softly at you. “Don’t really have a choice now.” 

And with that, Celina answered the door all excitedly and hugged you happily. 

"Hey! It's good to see you, girlie!" She chimed with a soft and welcoming voice.

“Hey, Celina,” You replied and hugged back. 

“It’s about time you come and visit me,” she giggled pulling back. “Ned is at school late today.”

As you guys did a bit of small talk a wave of emotions hit Peter like a hurricane as his eyes glossed over threatening waterfalls to fall from his soft and dark orbs.

He was hearing Celina speak for the first time.

He sniffled and you both looked at him with concern. He turned his head away and then turned his entire body. 

"Ahh you said he needs guidance,” Celina concluded.  “Let me go get my stuff. Come on in when you guys are ready." Celina smiled and walked inside leaving the door open. 

You turned to him and walked over by him. “Peter?”

He turned to look at you with watery eyes and his lips pressed together. He was holding back from just bursting into sobs.  It broke your heart.

You laid a hand on his cheek and he closed his eyes with a sigh of relief and leaned into it. You stroke your thumb over the apples of his cheeks gently with a concerned expression. The feeling of your hand on his face, helped him calm down slightly. Like ice to a wound.

"What's wrong, Peter?" You asked with a soft voice. “Are you okay?”

"Y-yeah," he sniffled. "It's just that growing up I've been helping Celina with talking and when everyone gave up on her I never did. And hearing her talk just triggered something…like…. right in my heart, y’know? And I couldn't help myself." 

You pouted slightly and wrapped your arms around him. He hugged back as you swayed him from side to side comfortingly. You echoed a string of "it's okay" and other encouraging words as he softly cried. He nuzzled his face into your neck and took a deep breath at your warmth and scent, just like he used to do after a hard mission years ago. 

He wanted to stay like this forever.

After a moment you pull back slightly and give him a soft kiss on the cheek. His eyes shot open as he looked at your equally shocked expression. He could still feel the linger of the peck on his cheek and he wanted to grab your face in his hands and kiss you.  But you both were frozen in place and looked at each other for a long moment. Then tension was high, the senses were racing as you had a silent conversation with your eyes. Before you knew it, you both leaned in. 

But before you could you felt a soft feeling against your leg and heard a tiny meow and purring coming from below. You both Look down to see a big fluffy orange cat with big round blue eyes looking up at the both of you.

"Thor!" Celina exclaimed, “Just because the door is open doesn’t mean you can walk out!” She ran out she ran out and saw both of you super close to each other. “Oop-...I’m sorry.” she said before she outburst into exclamation again with, “Loki!”

Peter felt something climbing his leg, shirt, and shoulder. A trill and purrs rang in his ear and he felt a weighted fur on his shoulder. He looked over to see black paws on his shoulder. He concluded it was another cat.

“Awww he likes you,” You smiled. “Lokitty approved already, that’s a record.”

“Does he not like other people?” Peter asked raising an arm and petting the cat.

The dark cat rubbed it’s face on Peter’s hand causing more purring.

“No, he only likes me Ned and (Y/N) and now you.” Celina explained taking the cat off of Peter’s shoulder.”Thor here loves everybody though.”

You picked up the fluffy orange cat and scratched under his chin with your painted nails. “Thor’s a big baby. Loki is a grumpy old man.”

Peter smiled and petted the orange bundle of fluff in your arms. 

“I’m ready when you guys are,” Celina smiled.

You looked up at Peter and he nodded in response. You both followed Celina into her apartment and she closed the door so you could set the cats down. As you took off your jacket, Peter took the time to glance over the apartment. It looked like a Dungeons and Dragons themed home. There were shelves filled with books about myths around the world, spellbooks, and tomes. There were plants in almost every corner and vintage decor everywhere. Peter smiled at the glass case full of Lego builds that he remembers building with Ned and his eyes focused on the death star with the missing Darth Vader that’s supposed by on top but instead is sitting on Peter’s desk in his apartment. The place was very Celina with touches of Ned which Peter found amusing. 

“I baked some cookies,” Celina started. “Feel free to make yourselves at home.”

“Thanks, Celi,” You smiled and hung your jacket by the door. 

“Can I use your bathroom?” Peter asked. 

“Sure!” Celina chimed as she pointed to a hallway behind him. “It’s over there, last door on your left.”

“Thank you,” and he goes to the bathroom to wash his face off from the seven different emotions he felt in less than fifteen minutes. 

He sighed before his superhearing picked up on the conversation you and Celina were having.

 "He's a cutie!" He could hear the smirk in her voice. 

You hum a giggle. “He is, isn’t he?” 

It was Peter’s turn to smirk with a blush added to his face. He then crossed his arms and leaned against the wall to listen. He knew it was wrong but it wasn’t his fault that he was a spider mutant with enhanced senses.

“How long have you guys been together, together?”

“Hm? Oh, we….we aren’t-” 

“Oh, please, I saw you two out there. I thought you said it wasn’t complicated anymore?”

“I said, it was less complicated.”

You were talking to her about him.

“Well, how about making it not complicated and making a move or something.”

“Celina, There’s such thing as taking things slow.”

“I dunno,” Celina sang. “You two have magnetic energy. I say act on it.”

"How?"

"Ask him to the gala. You need a plus one, no? Take him!"

"...I was gonna ask him actually."

Oh?

"Really? What changed your mind?"

"He's…a busy guy."

"He won't be once he sees that dress you're wearing. He'll be busy with you…hopefully taking it off."

Peter blinked rapidly at Celina’s response. I mean, she’s not wrong. Only if you consented of course. 

"Celina…!"

"What? That's what you want right?"

You went silent and that was all the answer Peter needed to know to solidify your feelings for him. His mind was wandering to places it shouldn’t.

"See?"

You sighed. "Nika will give me shit for it." You whined.

"Well tell Nika to remove the giant stick from her ass because it's true love. I can feel it."

“Like actually, or…?”

“I don’t need magic to feel the crazy tension between you two.”

Peter smiled and splashed his face with water and decided it was a good time to walk out with a newfound confidence. You were sitting at the kitchen table on the bench with one leg folded under the other and leaning your face on your hand with your elbow propped up on the table. Your eyes shifted to Peter as you swung your unfolded leg back and forth. You smiled at him and he smiled back as he sat next to you. 

“Hey,” You greeted. 

“Hi,” He responded as he met your eyes. 

“Feeling better?”

“Much better,” his voice was soft as he got lost in your (e/c) eyes for a moment. 

The only thing that got you both the break the gaze was Celina putting a plate of chocolate chip cookies, a porcelain teapot filled with tea, and different things to put in the tea like sugar cubes, a saucer with milk, lemon, and honey. She sure knew how to romanticize her life. Even her outfit made up of a black ruffle off-the-shoulder top and a long, flowy, floral, maroon, maxi skirt, made her look like she was a witch in a Ghibli movie.

“So what kind of reading would you like….uh…” She looked up in thought. “I didn’t catch your name.”

“Oh, fuck,” you cursed under your breath. “Peter. Peter Parker.”

“Oh!” Celina beamed as if his name rang a bell. “So you’re the guy she asked us about. Nice to meet you! I’m Celina.”

“Why does everyone remember? I asked you guys once like a month ago.”

“Because your lone wolf ass hasn’t talked about a boy in like three years unless it’s your dream boyfriend.” Celina retorted while picking up the pot of tea. “So when you bring up a guy we all get a little curious, y’ know?”

You rolled your eyes and waved your hand at her mirroring your father a lot and she hummed in amusement. 

“So Peter,” Celina began. “I have several options. I have Tarot cards, tea reading, and palmistry. I could do all three but it’s gonna cost you.”

“Oh?” Peter asked with a playful smirk. “How much?”

“Mmm, take (Y/N) on a date.”

“Oh my fucking god,” You hid your face. 

Peter snorted. “I don’t need to be bribed to do that.”

You looked at him flabbergasted. He only smiled at you before looking back at Celina who was eating all of this up with excited eyes. 

“I think I’ll do the Tarot.”

“Nuh-uh,” Celina responded. “You’re getting all three.”

“Thank you for everything today,” Peter smiled. “I didn’t know I needed all of that.”

You both were standing outside of his apartment building. After Celina did the full reading session on Peter, which he found insightful enough, she talked his ear off for three hours about anything and everything. It gave him nothing but happiness and he savored every word. You mostly just sat there and enjoyed the entire moment. You were leaning back against the wall with your hands in your jacket pocket and one leg crossed over the other.

“Anytime,” You smiled back.

You stood up straight and checked your phone before you tapped your phone on your hand nervously and looked like you were hesitating to say something. Peter could sense your nervousness.

“I…uh…also wanted to ask, if you would be my plus one for my charity gala? All your friends are gonna be there, I checked the list so I think it’s only fair that you’re there too especially because of your internship. Not that I’m only inviting you because of those things! I want you to be there and I want you to go with me…if you want. Don't feel obligated or anything. Yeah. You don't have to answer right away either, It’s like three weeks away and I’m babbling oh my god shut up (Y/N) please shut the fuck up.” 

You turned and leaned on the railing that was next to you both to catch your composure. Peter smiled big and chuckled softly. You reminded him of teenage Peter trying to ask out a teenage you. It was like you guys switched places and he was going to have his fun with it. Especially now that he knows for sure that you feel something for him. 

“You were holding that in all day weren’t you?” 

“...Yeah. I wanted to ask you when I first saw you today but I psyched myself out. You’re a busy guy and everything so I wasn’t sure if-”

He stepped closer to you, leaned his hand on the railing causing the muscles in his arm to flex, and smiled tilting his head slightly. Your noses are centimeters apart and he’s looking into your eyes deeply like he’s searching for something. Your breath hitched slightly at the closeness and it took everything in you to not let your senses take over and pounce on him. You weren’t sure if you were unseriously offended, turned on, or both.

Peter fucking Parker, you thought.

Peter fucking me. Your senses hummed at that.

“I would love to be your plus one,” He replied lowly. “But I’ll let you know for sure by tomorrow. Work schedule and everything.” 

“Y-yeah, yeah. Work schedule. “You pressed your lips together still looking into his eyes. Peter could tell you were holding back. 

“I’ll message you.” He finally had your number, that you gave to him at lunch. 

“G-great, I’ll let you know the time and everything when you do.”

“Okay,” He replied as he glanced down at your lips and stepped back slightly. “I should go inside now, and you should get going before it gets too late.”

“Peter?” you asked, almost desperately.

“Hm?”

“What you said earlier. Were we…” you started still trying to gain your composure. “Were we…you know more than friends…?”

He looks at you silently for a moment before opening his mouth to respond.

“You know what, never mind, ignore that.” You chuckled softly, shaking your head rapidly. “I shouldn’t think about these things or my brain might try to split in half again.”

Good point. He smiled. “Goodnight, Stark.”

“Goodnight, Parker.”

He walked backwards towards the door taking in your form before running back first into it and cursing under his breath. He then leaned back against the door with his arms crossed as if to play it off.

You giggled watching him. Such a dork. 

He blushed looking at you and smiled giving you a salute. You saluted back and walked to your car while he watched you to make sure you got in safely. Once you got into the car and drove off. Peter walked inside and leaned on the door with a happy sigh.

~

Tags:

@chrisevans-realwife @riordanness @peterdarlingg @thecrystalclarity @brckenmemories @paleprincesssxo @blackcanary130 @kindlover

[108garys]

Simple Girl

OK so it took me a bit to get the concept for Manny Sherman's(belated) new year's birthday art down but I have landed on a vampiric depiction of his first murder(is this a thinly veiled excuse to get more eyes on Ensnared? Perhaps)

At the end of the day I figured the messiness just fit better than continuing to try for something more polished(hair is made extra long for that metaphorical ensnaring effect in the art)

And the title is in reference to a song I associate with the character

'resurrect me stand me to attention, take my voices learn to love them' (is that whole lyric not just his canon fate? More on the song undercut)

I first put Iamx's Simple girl as a Manny Sherman song when I was sussing out music that got the vibe for tbolh and just generally when I was starting to dig into his character more, some parts lyrically work for specific au stuff but I will say that in the general canon sense it captures how he talks about his murders as art, how he acts like he's so above it all and in this lyrical context he'd require the simple girl to reach that transcendence but there's also this undercurrent of not fitting and what it takes to fit(and also the singer much like Sherman has a January birthday so that lyric is self referential which adds a layer to it all), I could go on about all the naunces for the various timelines/aus and dynamics(at least one wherein the 'simple girl' is idolized entirely but that isn't relevant here) but it do be getting long so please let me hear about your thoughts on the art/writing/song, thank you 💕

@kassiekole22 @delurkr @ctrvpani @tinynightmarewoman

@eframschweigersskincells @aydeenchan @qusok @kindheartedgummybears