#and it's crazy how i can't recall stuff

[clockworkbee]

in that reading era where nothing less than a 3.5★ book sticks in my head all that much

[kashilascorner]

The question is how Thérèse did not kill her husband sooner lol

[n3ptoonz]

Ok ok ok we got the boys getting walked in on soooo what if Earthrealm boys walked in on US?

i knew somebody would have this idea 😈 REVERSE REVERSE 🔄

these are gonna be drabbles instead of bullet points

implied scent knk mention, sphinx can't stick to a theme to save her life

Scorpion

Kuai Liang was shocked at first, but quickly understood. He's gone a lot and knows that. He's not upset at all by this, what gets the job done in his absence is what he roots for, but he'd still rather be the one making you sound like that. Lowkey is impressed with how well you must've been going at it too. 'Have I ever made them sound like that...? Hold up-' he thinks. Once you see him and are like woahh when did you get here he's like "Curiosity got the best of me, I'd like to help if you'll have me." as if you weren't already jumping on him before he finished his sentence.

Sub-Zero

"You just couldn't wait, could you?" Bi-Han said, standing over you. You jumped at the sight of him looming over your almost fucked-out glow from your own hands and splayed out on the couch; just how the fuck was he so quiet?! As you nervously try to explain, thinking he's actually upset at you, he interrupted you again by grumbling and picking you up to properly escort you to your shared bedroom. He laid you down and got on top of you, pressing himself between your legs. "I'm not angry with you. I just wish you had waited." he said before letting himself hang free. "But I don't mind finishing the job."

Kenshi Takahashi

When Kenshi checked out where the noise was coming from, he caught you grinding against a lounge pillow with his shirt over your nose. Once your eyes opened and saw him standing in the doorway half shocked half into it, you kicked the pillow off the bed and sat up. "No, no, please, don't let me interrupt." he teased half jokingly. Honestly he could see himself encouraging the concept. He has many duties to attend to, so who would he be to tell you not to tend to yourself? He walked further into the room with a more serious look on his face, he really wanted to apologize he couldn't always be there, but since he was now there's nothing stopping him from helping his lover out.

Smoke

Tomas was beyond flustered. He planned to come over to your place and cook together to make up for lost time since he's often very busy. He had a key to your house so he naturally just walked in, set his stuff down, and went to go find you. "Hey, you ready to cook-" cue a Disney studio audience gasp. After like a full 60 seconds of him stuttering over his words he apologized many times before you stopped him. You offered for him to help you out, and now he was pushing down his own immediate boner, but a simple 'yes' sealed the deal for the both of you.

Johnny Cage

This sexy fucking prick. Unbeknownst to you Johnny just sat and watched from the door of your bedroom, truly fascinated by how needy you were for him. Before you could even reach a semblance of climax, here he waltzed in all smug, "11 times." he said. You gasped and threw the covers over yourself, asking what the hell he's on about now (you're used to him popping up unannounced). "You said my name 11 times, new record babe." He knew your next remark would either be witty or frustrated, so he spoke again. "Ah, ah, ah, let's make it 20."

Kung Lao

Kung Lao is also another sexy fucking prick, but a little worse. You have been walked in on before but not thwacking the noodle or flicking the bean, something less crazy like changing, and yet he still was a teaser. You recalled if he was coming over today and reached the conclusion that he would have no reason to, so you got to work. Silly silly you, Johnny and Lao are known for showing up out of nowhere, you knew that! So there you were doing your thing, and boom, Kung Lao pulled up and caught you by accident. He had no regrets though, all you saw looking at you was a smirk, clear idea on his face, and his signature dimples smiling back.

Raiden

Look guys idgaf what anybody feels or says, I can say he's baby while also knowing a lot, obviously. Raiden is a grown ass man with a dick and balls, but he's never walked in on someone before. Me personally I believe he'd be in shock, and he was. Why? Not only because he walked in on AND interrupted your own time, but you were whispering and moaning his name too. Like Smoke he'd be shifting where he stood trying to control his aching boner, but surely once you gave him the okay to enter your room, hell, even touch you? Game fucking on. He's still nervous but wouldn't let that stop him!

Liu Kang

Liu Kang may be a God, but obviously he cannot tell the future. He just created the world and tried to maintain peace as much as he could. He can predict things, and that included what you were doing while he wasn't there. He figured with how much he was gone it wouldn't be surprising if you took matters into your own hands, and he was right. He slowly rounded the corner to the sight of you using some kind of toy and muttering incoherent words that lead to his name somewhere in there, but it didn't bother him. In fact, when he made his presence known he offered to help including the toy if you wanted.

Geras

Lowkey I don't think Geras would know what to do. He doesn't interact with mortals much technically outside of Liu. So like, if you were waiting for him back at his chambers especially when he took so long to come back due to business, he'd be stuck in his tracks. He'd say there's no need to apologize but rather explain your desire to him so he could fulfill whatever void was left in his absence. I feel like he'd be reassuring too if you were embarrassed and happily make your wishes his command.

a/n: OKKAAAYYYYY i got this out FUCK writers block and periods and life IS A BITCH and ik i recycle the same stuff but like hey, it works🥱

[nemesis-writer]

[Unwanted Ransom(Chapter 6)]

Masterlist Oxytocin

TW- some shows of mental illness

10 years ago...

"Xerxes come on say something this is a safe place."

"Then why is there a camera?"

"It's there just in case you get-"

"I get what, crazy? Yeh, lady I know the drill"

"It says in your file that you have gone through multiple doctors in the past since your mother's death."

"And what makes you think you can fix me?"

"Because you are special, you have so much potential, and you put it all to waste."

"Who cares? My so called 'family', if I can recall they abandoned me, neglected me, and one of the little brats scarred me." Yep you obviously know who I'm talking about

"Xerxes, don't put the blame on others."

"You've been married for 15 years, three kids, one teen, one toddler, and one infant.

You're parents are divorced and no matter how many times you and your husband hate each other you wanna stay married in order to prevent the same trauma you had pass on to your kids.

Did I get it correct? Oh wait don't answer that I'm always correct." I sighed laying my head down.

"And you've become observant when it comes to hurting others, see I've studied your pattern of behaviour based on the reviews all your other doctors have represented to me before I took this case. And boy was it a long read.

Technically I'm entitled to tell you anything that could help you. And you thought that you could go through me?"

"I don't give a fuck what people say, who do I trust? No one, if a friend wants to jump on train tracks, don't expect me to hold their hand.

I don't give a damn what they insinuate about me anymore, I am an Amala never a Wayne, so I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to." And with that I abruptly stood up and grabbed my bag, I head out there.

The only reason I went there because, my 'dad' heard that I got into a fight and handcuffed the brat in the janitor's closet.

Just suck it up Xerxes, in a few years, you can finally escape them.

'Just suck it up' That's the advice I'd always tell myself no matter how much I cried, scream, or hurt myself.

Present...

"AHHHH, PETE, THERE IS A FUCKING BUILDING!!!!" I screamed as I held on tight to him.

"JENNY MOVE YOUR HAIR, OH SHIT!!!" he lost a bet so he had to swing me from Vincent's house to dad's. When we finally descended, I sighed and laid on the floor for a while.

"Y'know MJ would normally puke with this." He sighed.

"I'm built different" And I walked normally inside my house, I didn't feel any signs of...

fuck

oh wait

Oh shit

never-mind

I rushed to my bedroom's toilet and hurled a lot. Gosh, I should've listened to MJ. With that I washed my face, and brushed my mouth. I went down-stairs ignoring my surroundings.

I kinda had a crush on Pete for a while, but then I met Vincent and felt like Pete is a brother to me.

"AYOO, PETE LET'S GO WATCH SAW 2-" I immediately cut myself off when I saw, something I thought was a dream.

oh wait

it can't be

tell me I'm dreaming.

OH SHIT....

"Hey baby bird-" Richard stuttered, and tried to hug me.

"Back off Grayson, dad what the fuck is going on."

"Xerxes-"

"Who said I was talking to you limp-dick? Now dad seriously what the hell is going on here?" I looked at dad with puppy eyes, gosh I'm so adorable.

"Now, they just came here to drop your stuff." He explained.

"They are not my things they are Xerxes' things, I only things that I need are what I have now." I stated, as I looked at the cunt who ruined my life, I only sighed.

"Xerxes-"

"Zip it Timothy, or I'll tear you're tongue from your head." I stated, I've been watching the Originals again, and might I add, Nikklaus' has been looking good.

"Xerxes-" Jason tried to start. But I cut him off with a glare, he then corrected himself.

"Jennifer, we miss you and we apologise-"

"For what? Neglecting me? Abandoning me? LEAVING ME TO DIE?"

"We didn't mean to." They all protested.

"Bullshit!"

"Language!" Dad sighed.

"When is my birthday?"

"January 7?"

"No, it's September 8, what the hell is wrong with you people?" I was eager to run and ditch these people and run up to my room.

"Xerxes, you're my sister come on." He tried to grab me, but I dodged it and grabbed his hand spinning him downwards. Thanks Nat.

"Touch me one more time, and your arm won't be the only thing that will hurt."

I immediately rushed upstairs and ran to my room, locking it, which activates voice-recognition. Gosh, I was so angry with them. I started to get really angry and accidentally punched a hole in my wall that was connected to Morgan's room.

"JENNY!!!" Oh fuck.

"SORRY M! I'll fix it later." And with that I just dropped onto the bed. I grabbed my phone and texted Vincent.

Jinx- Hey V

V- Hey Jen, how r u?

Jinx- My previous fucked-up family is back now

V- damn, wanna hang tommorow? 🙂

Jinx- Sure, but I gotta lotta hw tho 😢

V- call me if you can then 🤙🏻

And with that I decided to lay down and wonder how fucked up my life could get. I started to fall asleep so I decided to shut down all of my devices, in order to avoid the annoying sound of the 'Brady Bunch' trying to text me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N- It could've been longer if my dumbass didn't accidentally delete my first draft, could've been so much better.

Taglist

@lunayaps, @not-aya, @iluvcatzz, @vanessa-boo, @ivyrose9194

[whitehotwild]

!!!!!!!SPOILER FOR THE NEW EPISODE!!!!!!! but what if you were the one to make butcher realize kessler was a hallucination...

ouuuuu episode 6 pissed me off so bad (really just the hughie stuff, it made me feel so icky), but the butcher scenes were the few bits i actually appreciated. that part where butcher realizes its not real was so well done.

ANYWAY!!! sorry this took so long, this was really hard to write for whatever reason and im not… the most proud of it. BUT, i’ll post beach fluff soon (ish). LOVE YOU

☆ You got all the way to the subway station when you realize you'd forgotten your apartment keys at the office. You curse yourself during the almost 15 minutes it takes to walk 8 blocks and ride the elevator back up to the office that you barely notice Butcher talking to himself when you walk through the door. He doesn't notice you at all.

He's turned towards the back of the room, steady yapping away at the empty space where the noticeboard is. You wait, confused. Maybe he's talking to someone on the phone, but from what you can tell, his phone is nowhere near him.

"Who ya talking to?" You call from the door, assuming he's just talking to himself.

Butcher stops his one-sided conversation, turning in his chair to face you. "Back already? Was just talking 'bout you a minute ago; got someone I want you to meet." He waves you over as he stands up from his chair.

"Joe, this is our little wild card I was tellin' you about. Love, this is Joe Kessler, an old war mate of mine." He introduces you to the wall with his arm over your shoulder.

A mixture of shock and confusion washes over you as you look up at him. "Wha—Butcher…" you start, quiet concern heavy in your tone. " There's no one there."

Butcher pulls away and looks at you like you're the crazy one. "Fuck are you on about?" He looks between you and where Kessler stands in front of them, "He's standing right here, plain as fuckin' day."

"I-"You shake your head, "We are the only ones in here." Trying to reason with him, you keep your voice as steady as possible through your panic.

"She can't fuckin' see me, dumbass." Kessler snarks, a huff of amusement escaping him. "I'm you."

Butcher's brows furrow, a tense look in his eyes, "The fuck's that supposed to mean, you're me?"

"I mean, out of all the people your festering, fucked up brain coulda conjured up… ya picked me," Kessler answers with a proud smile.

Butcher reels back a bit at the sudden realization. The silence between you and him stretches on long enough, "Butcher… Joe Kessler is dead. You told me he died in Afghanistan, remember?"

About a year or two ago, you and Butcher got a little too deep over a bottle of whiskey. Somehow, the conversation led to Butcher telling you he was in the military, he told you about his friend Joe, he told you how Joe was probably the only person he knew who was as bad as him, and he told you that he died in the valley.

Butcher looks to you, "You fuckin' remember that? That was forever ago…" his brows furrow as he recalls the conversation.

"… I remember everything you tell me." You shrug as if that's the most obvious answer.

In the corner of Butcher's eye, Kessler mockingly pouts and coos, "Aw, ain't that fucking precious; looks like someone's got a little crush on you."

Butcher shakes his head with a scoff; you take it a bit personally, not being able to see Kessler. "No…"

"Man, c'mon. The real Joe Kessler? He's dead in the Panjshir Valley, you know that! You never dragged me out. You left me to die.."

"No… No. I remember that… I fuckin' remember that."

"Unless, of course, you got a big ol' fat V'd up brain tumor, ya cunt, which is why you are seeing me in the first place-"

"Butcher, you are freaking me the fuck out. Do I- Should I take you to the fucking hospital?" Your voice overlaps Kessler's in Butcher's head, "Not sure if you're aware, but seeing people that aren't there isn't fucking normal, especially for someone whose health is on a steady decline!"

Kessler groans, "Goddamn, she's a worse nag than your fuckin' wife!"

"Don't you fuckin' talk about her!" Butcher shouts back, but it's unclear to him whether he's talking about you or Becca. Maybe both? Maybe you?

"Butcher!" You can't take any more of this. You step before him, trying to draw his attention back to you.

His eyes shift from Kessler behind you, finally acknowledging you. "I ain't going to the fuckin' hospital. They're just gonna tell me what I already know." He shrugs like this might as well happen. He's already been talking to his dead wife for months. Why not tack on another one.

"Stop saying that shit, God! Fuck! You're not gonna fucking die!" You snap at him, shoving his chest.

Butcher looks at you, exasperation written all over his face. It feels like you've had this conversation a billion times, him casually mentioning his impending doom and you not having any of it, practically throwing a tantrum every time it comes up.

"Yeah? Because you've already found something to fix this? You have to stop with this. I'm dying. It is what it is." Butcher sighs heavily through his nose as he sits back in his chair.

He doesn't know how much more of this either of you can take. It always ends the same way: you make a promise to him that he knows you can't keep it, and he pretends to believe you just to calm you down.

Tears well in your eyes as you shake your head like a petulant child. "No! I already told you, no, I won't- I'm not gonna let you just fucking die. I'm gonna find a way to fix this. I already fucking told you that-"

"For fuck's sake, you can't fix this! What the fuck are you gonna do, huh? You gonna get Frenchie to cook up some magic cure for this? I ain't gonna put all my eggs in your basket. You don't know what you're doing, love. You're just chasin' your tail." Butcher tries to reason with you.

You groan out, "At least I'm fucking trying! Don't you think it's a little bit selfish to just… give up?! You got people who care about you, whether or not you wanna believe that! Hughie, Ryan-"

"You?"

"Yeah, me! I wouldn't be here yelling at you if I didn't fucking care about you, you fucking asshole! God, Butcher, are you fucking stupid? I can't keep-"

"Listen to her, Billy." Becca's voice rings in Butcher's head, and he does everything in his power not to look behind him. "Listen to her. She cares about you more than any of them, you know that. You have to listen to her."

Butcher stands up and lays his hands on your shoulders, "Shut up." His voice is ignored as you keep on with your rant. He shakes you gently, "Shut. Up. I believe you. I believe that you care about me, and I believe that you want to save me, but I know I can't hold my breath for something like that… But… You're you. You're stubborn, you're a pain in my arse, and you're the best at getting what you want. So I believe you. I'll believe you till I'm dead. That's the best I got."

A long silence passes between you before you shrug his hands off your shoulders and wrap your arms around his neck. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Billy. I'm gonna fix this, we're gonna fix it." Your tone is soft and full of promise, muffled by his shoulder.

All he can do is nod, he's hesitant as he wraps his arms around you, one hand fisting your shirt, his chin rests on your head. "I know, pet. I know you will."

(divider by @/plutism)

[myheadhurtscutely]

i'm craving some fluff with sam monroe rn. sharing my thoughts and curious for yours?? just rambling lol ❤️❤️❤️

listening to music in sam's room with him, maybe getting ready for something? a concert? and fixing his makeup, his hands unable to leave your hips as you work. ofc his eyes are glued to your lips (and occasionally drift down to your tits) and there's just a soft, unspoken connection between you two. i'm imagining he listens to The Cure (idk if it's really his type of music i'm not all into that culture ngl) and it's just a gentle scene. ofc later on after the concert is over (or whatever event) he can't help but wanna make out with you, maybe you're sitting on his lap in his car. maybe there's a bit of tension- but you two make out until the sun comes up, and return to your respective houses with the both of your makeup messed up. i also feel like he's the type to either be too nervous to hold onto you in public when he's sober, but if he's had anything at all he's all grabby and aggressive with it. I think he'd get jealous a lot when he's not sober too. Definitely the type to get into a fight if he thinks some guy is looking at you too much.

idk if it's too in character but i love my emo bf💋

friends to lovers?Sam Monroe x Reader

wc' 878

Warnings! mention of a tiny bit of violence, marijuana use, sexual implications but nothing crazy. crazy amounts of fluff tbh.

LORD HAVE MERCY THANK YOU

i love this.

you and sam are best buds, like comfortable silence type close. You have always gone to concerts together and what not. You were both the social rejects, and that was okay. Because you had each other.

whilst the friendship was cute and close, it was extremely abnormal in some ways like you laying on his chest after school in his room while he showed you some underground pierce the veil and souxie and the banshees. He knew you liked them so he would do everything he could to peak your interest. His odd fixation with your body, lips, and face was not a friend kind of normal either.

You and sam had eagerly been waiting for months. concert tickets ready. and outfits picked and packed. It was your guys favorite band and some how you had snagged tickets a couple months back for a birthday gift to sam. He obviously was overjoyed when you surprised him with this. it gave him a reason to be delusional. he'd often lie awake, listening to your breathing on the other end of the phone whilst you slept, practicing his confession.

Today was the day. Sam came over with his pre rolls, tickets, and his dingy old eyeliner stick. He tried to fix his hair up a bit so he could look good for you guys wouldn't have to loose anymore time getting ready.

You opened the door to your room, guiding him to your bed to sit where he's sat countless times before. "go ahead and light one while i get my stuff ready." Sam might as well been in a trance, not listening to a word you said. you looked perfect. You were already ready to go, make up, hair, outfit, all perfect in everyway.

Sam fumbled with his joint and lighter after finally coming back down to earth and recalling what you told him. You and him both took drags of it as you put your pallets near you on the bed, sitting yourself on sams lap. His head leaned back against the pillow to look at your pretty face hanging over him.

sams hands naturally rested on your hips, like every other time you did his makeup but this time was different. His hands drug up your sides, his mind falling between his imagination and reality. He had done this a million times in his head, though he'd never admit it. He couldn't fathom how soft and beautiful you were sat on his waist like that. He hoped you didn't notice the prodding object growing underneath you. He had always told you it just does that when he's high. You shrugged it off.

His lips were mere inches from yours as you gently smudged his liner, looking up closely to make sure your work was perfect. He couldn't do anything but smile. even with his eyes closed he felt your divine prescence warming up his insides.

Your lips quickly brushed his cheek as you excitedly praised your handy work, urging him to look at the mirror. His face was beat red, almost as if you smacked the fuck out of him and left the imprint of you. He smiled the whole way to the concert.

"have you ever shot gunned before?" you asked him in the back of the taxi with a plotting grin, joint slowly burning in your hand.

the ride back home after the concert was quiet. you and sam had gotten the both of you kicked out.

Some guy had tried to dance with you, and eventually went as far as to borderline grope you. In no world would sam let that happen, so in response, he busted him in the face. you were quick to follow with a swift kick to his gut as he was knelt at your feet. so now here you were. back in the taxi, already on the way back home

Neither of you knew what to say. You felt bad cause it was sams birthday gift, and he felt bad cause he couldn't imagine how distressing that must've been.. and did you see him differently?

your hand slowly slid over to his in the backseat. you both knew peace in that moment. everything was ok. tired eyes met the others as you both give crooked smiles, to further affirm your feelings.

you and sam took turns, brushing each others thumbs the rest of the way.

You and sam didn't wanna go home yet. The taxi driver dropped you off at your car in the lot near home, and you both escaped the frigid air by climbing inside. The backseat was pretty empty except for some blankets and a couple of sams clothes from the last sleepover.

The both of you climbed to the back, seeing as neither of you planned on getting home for the rest of the night, feeling too weary and disoriented to travel any longer, much less separate for the night.

A cold chill shook you against sam as your body laid in between his, propped up against the passenger door. "Cold?" Sam asked, rubbing his hands up your arms, sliding over your goosebumps.

Sam adjusted himself sliding off his oversized jacket, opting to make it a blanket for you instead. As the hum of cars passed you both by, and the rain pattered on the windows of the car, he pressed soft kisses to the crown of your head.

note' i know this wasnt exactly what you had in mind but i loved this idea and i kinda ran with it, tysm!

[hotgirlstiles]

Derek gets deeply pissed off when someone says smn like "how didn't you kill Stiles yet? he's so annoying and he's babbling all the time. how can you stand to be with him? aren't you embarrassed when he talks nonsense?" bc what the fuck do you mean he's embarrassed?

He's not annoyed or frustrated, because he likes hearing Stiles talk, he likes that Stiles feels comfortable around him enough to let his conscious flow free. He loves it, bc he sees how Stiles shuts up in the presence of his dad, he knows that he's the only one since Claudia who actually listens to what Stiles says.

And he hates when Stiles hears those things bc he shuts off and doesn't talk for days and Derek has to grab him by his face and growl "fucking talk to me" and shake him a little. And Stiles explodes and cries and they have sex and then everything is normal again.

OH YM GOD YESSS./ HEDWIG OH MY GOD. this is so crazy cause i once had a post about how stiles' exes/previous relationship has definitely done the "kisses you to shut you up" thing especially when he's rambling and stuff so when he's finally with derek, he FULLY expects derek to do the same. like to the point that he sometimes suddenly goes quiet because no one has ever let him ramble this long and surely derek isn't even listening anymore??? except. except derek looks up from whatever he's doing and perfectly follows up on whatever stiles has been saying and even says some super specific things he's said bc guess what! guess what! derek hale IS the most perfect boyfriend and he LOVES stiles. to death!!!

"He loves it, bc he sees how Stiles shuts up in the presence of his dad, he knows that he's the only one since Claudia who actually listens to what Stiles says." GODDDDDDD. I JUST KNOW YOU WERE SMIRKING SO EVIKLLY. YOU KNEW WHAT YOU WERE GONNA DO TO ME WITH THIS SENTENCE CHRIST. i forgot what fics i read this once but claudia being the only one who can keep up with stiles' talking and random changes of topic. the sheriff who can't even keep up with stilesclaudia's conversations. the sheriff who has definitely, at one point after claudia's death, told stiles to shut up because claudia is dead and no one's gonna listen to him anymore............

i just. oh my7 god. i have so much fucking emotions about stiles' rambly self and derek absolutely loving it and keeping track of everything and LISTENING. like derek hale is a listener he LISTENS!!!! sometimes he even shocks stiles because he'd randomly open up a conversation by recalling stiles has said daysss or weeks ago and acting like they were just talking abt it. like he knows how much stiles loves talking abt his interests or abt anything in the sun it's so. he just loves him so much

i jsut love the idea that derek knows stiles is often annoying and rambly but that's HIS annoying and rambjly human. he loves him BECAUSE he's annoying and rambly, because he's who exactly derek needs..... he'd absolutely punch someone for saying all that shit abt stiles honestly he's just so perfect

[rockybloo]

With it nearing the end of the year, I feel like it's a good time to just have some real talk about why I create art.

At some point during in high school, during those years where you are pressured to figure out what you want to do when you grow up and what you want to major in when you go to college, I had wanted to go to art school after high school. I decided against it ultimately because I just didn't see a true appeal for me. I started to realize that I enjoyed my art so much more when I didn't have the pressure on me to create something for a fancy final product. Yeah, I could go but then I'd have to change aspects of myself I didn't really want to change but had to because that's what the world says I gotta do if I want to be a good artist.

And that's the thing I sort of hate the most about being able to create anything. You have to be good. Otherwise you are wasting your time. You aren't allowed to just make stuff for fun and for a hobby - you have to constantly be striving for improvement at a pace others have set for you. You can't just have it as a hobby. If you make art then it's expected that you make good art.

You're not allowed to be satisfied with being mediocre.

I've been actively posting my art online since I opened a Deviantart account way back in middle school. I'm 26, on my way to becoming 27. And as someone who has spent a solid decade online, I feel more certain than ever that I am a hobby artist. Having a fulltime job DEFINIATELY has helped me come to that conclusion but even before, I knew I liked to draw for fun. I don't like to stress about what I am sharing to cyberspace, I like just having this digital archive of stuff I've made and stories I've written.

I call myself a self indulgent artist because I'm incredibly selfish draw things I want and write stories I'd enjoy.

That's not to say I don't care that people enjoy my work and feel represented at times. I love it when people share how happy they feel when they see my OCs and read my stories. I'm happy I can fulfill some niches for people. Honestly, it'll always be crazy to me when I make something so damn specific that I wanna see and share it just for some other people to get excited. There are benefits to having a public digital archive your art and reactions people may have are one of them.

But ultimately I don't create to make others happy. If I did focus my art on just doing that, I promise you that my online presence and art would look DRASTICALLY different.

I share my stuff online because it's a whole lot easier to archive all my art as well as being able to share my stuff with the world and occasionally make some friends. Posting my art shows I was alive so MAYBE JUST MAYBE I will not be watered down when recalled in memories and people will always know I was insane about my OCs.

I'm pretty satisfied with be a mid artist. My finished work makes me happy, and what I care about is managing to create something of the fellas that reside in my head because seeing my OCs makes me happy...AND I'M THE ONLY SOURCE OF CONTENT FOR THEM SO I GOTTA COOK MY OWN FOOD AND EAT IT TOO--

ANYWAYS I am in no rush to level myself up. I'm 27 and human lifespans are pretty long. Even though it's slow and subtle, I have def been making improvements in my work...but mainly because there are aspects about my OCs that I occasionally realize I am struggling with and pull a "Do it for her" as I work on what I am having a hard time with. SURE they might not be improvements others would like to see but they are improvements that make me happy. And I am excited to see how my art develops over my existence on this planet.

.

.

.

...I am also excited to see if my black ass can finish any of my webcomics before I die. I KNOW I CAN DEF FINISH ONE OF 'EM I JUST DUNNO WHICH ONE IT'S GONNA BE! IT'S A RACE TO SEE WHO MAKES IT TO THE FINISH LINE BEFORE I KEEL OVER

[morlock-holmes]

I didn't say I think "dominant" culture values rational systems (and what dominant culture do you even mean), just that rationalism falls way short on its claims to do so. And I dunno, this is personal, but I can't agree that the subculture that told me "actually you should reframe your entire life around your scrupulosity" is much of an improvement, even if the bar is extremely low. Not when that subculture is full of all the kinds of social manipulation and cruelty it claims to be above.

I'm making very narrow claims that don't really have anything to do with what you're talking about here.

I have trouble communicating how much even high functioning autistic people have struggled with things that allistic people "just know", (a phrase I've heard again and again when interrogating allistic people).

Here's an example, which I believe I heard as a real life example although I can't recall where:

You have issues with the texture of clothing and there are only a few dress shirts you have that you can stand to wear. You have a sudden nose-bleed on one of your shirts and get blood all over the collar and down the front.

You launder the shirt but the blood stains have set in and are still very visible.

Should you wear that shirt to the office?

Most allistic people already know that the answer is, "almost certainly not."

An autistic person is likely to go through this process:

I have no idea if I should wear that shirt to the office or not, so let's figure it out.

Well, I have laundered the shirt so it is clean and sanitary, the stains are just visual blemishes.

All the social messages I've heard since I were a kid say that you can't judge a book by its cover and that looks don't matter, it's what's inside that counts.

And, I have a desk job, I wasn't hired to look a certain way, but rather to produce a certain kind of work, and wearing this comfortable shirt makes it easy for me to work without being distracted by uncomfortable clothes.

Therefore, logically, I can't imagine that anybody at the office will object to my wearing this shirt.

That last sentence is key, and I really want you to focus on it. You **aren't** thinking, "Well, maybe the button down drones at the office think this is a problem, but I know better than they do."

No, you aren't thinking that at all. You're thinking, "I put together the clues so I'm sure everyone at the office will feel the exact same way as I do"

And when they don't, it's a shock.

Now, I want you to further imagine that this is how you reason about other people and the world, but through some cosmic joke you've ended up at an employer where dressing right is incredibly important.

You'll get yelled at by your boss if you wear the wrong thing and your coworkers will turn on you. But there's no published dress code, you're just supposed to "just know" what an employee should wear.

But look at your reasoning above! You *don't* "just know" what the fashion is. Imagine you eventually say, to your boss and some coworkers, "I'm starting to get really stressed about not knowing what to wear to work, I really want to wear the right thing and be part of the team but I don't know how and I'm getting stressed out."

Immediately everybody turns on you. Your boss calls you into his office to ream you out. Your coworkers start a petition to fire you because you're obviously trying to undermine the valuable work culture that they have worked so hard to create. Concerned work friends pull you aside and go, "Jesus, are you crazy? We all stress out about what to wear but you never say it in public!"

Think about what that might feel like.

Now imagine you get fired and at your next job the boss is like, "Hey, the dress code is pretty important here, here's a list of what we expect. Sometimes some stuff is kind of on the edge so you won't know, but it's always fine to ask me if something is appropriate, and if you accidentally wear something that's on the wrong side that's fine, I'll let you know and we'll work on getting you some more appropriate stuff, but you won't get in trouble."

I want you to really think about what it would feel like, as an autistic person, to be at that second job after decades working at the first. To suddenly know you could ask questions or make mistakes at something that doesn't come easily to you after so much time in an environment where you're told that this stuff comes easily to everyone and people only *pretend* to be bad at it to get away with things.

What you're doing is coming in and going, "Well, that second job might be bad for other, unrelated reasons."

I will completely grant that, you're utterly correct. That second job might be terrible for a bunch of unrelated reasons.

But I'm never going back to that first job.

[panlight]

This might be a bit of a TW but what do you think happens to a person’s insides after becoming a vampire? The films made the vamps break apart like porcelain dolls and I don’t remember if Bree’s book ever mentioned that? Do you think a vampire’s guts are like geodes being cracked open? Or are they solid all the way through? (It’s crazy that a vampire saga has very little gore in it.)

The movies definitely played into the "statue" thing. If I recall from some behind the scene commentary, part of it was that it allowed them to get away with things like decapitations and keep a PG-13 rating to treat them like statues that just broke off in chunks and didn't really have any "insides." They were able to get around some limitations on violence and gore that way. They also did stuff like them 'cracking' as an injury which I don't think was in the books at all.

As for what vampires in book!canon look like on the inside . . . we don't really get much. I personally don't think they are solid, mostly from vague descriptions about how venom and the blood they drink moves through their bodies. I think something like the circulatory system with veins and arteries and capillaries remain. She specifically talks about how fluids contribute to physical arousal in a similar way as blood does in humans. So there's some sort of fluid moving around . . . somehow.

I sort of imagine it in my own head as all the organs and stuff is still there it's just harder and empty/hollow. They can still move and bend and stretch so it can't be like THAT solid but it would seem solid compared to a human body I guess. They still breathe but they don't need to; seems to me the lungs can still expand but there's no blood to oxygenate. The bladder and intestines are there but empty and useless. I think SM has said the blood is just sort of 'absorbed' rather than digested, flowing through the old veins. That's why vampires can look flushed after feeding. HOW it all moves around without a beating heart to circulate IDK. Tiny muscle contractions? ~Magic?

And it could be that the vampires themselves don't really know. Their skin is so hard and impenetrable that it makes it difficult for them to study themselves. What would a vampire autopsy even look like? Would it be someone who had been decapitated and the head was burned but the rest of the body remained intact? The medical imaging equipment couldn't see through Renesmee's amniotic sac (I think that's what it was?) so I doubt it can see through vampire skin.

[petitelepus]

I can imagine Gyomei being so excited about how kindergartens work. If he ended up in the modern world he would definitely try to apply for a job as a teacher. One of the strongest, largest teachers there is.

Summary: You and Gyomei are roommates after he gets sent to your world. Luck is on your side, you find his dream job.

Warnings: None

A/N: Isekai, Reverse Isekai, Gender Neutral Reader, Gyomei Himejima

You and Gyomei, your recent new roommate from another world were on your way back to your humble home you shared together. The two of you had been walking around the town, picking up the best deals from different stores and with heavy shopping bags, you were done and ready to head home.

You first met the Gyomei when you were on your way home from work one late evening. It was raining heavily and there were barely any people on the streets…

Except for the huge wet blind man wandering around cluelessly, lost like a small puppy.

You admit you were staring, he was that huge, but his clothes were uncommon also. You briefly wondered if he was a monk but when you approached him, you noticed his milky eyes and realized that he must have been blind.

You had asked if there was anyone you could call to come and pick him up, but when you mentioned your phone he was confused.

"Namu Amida Butsu… Thank you, but… What is a phone?"

Okay, he was certainly a monk, but he didn't know what phone was?

"Do you have a place to go?" You asked and he shook his head, "No, it looks like I'm far from home…"

"Oh…"

"You aren't some crazy killer or a rapist, right?"

"Namu Amida Butsu… I would never harm innocent…"

He sounded sincere… You may have been too gullible, but you trusted him.

"Would you like to come to my place? Even if only until the rain ends?"

"I…" He nodded humbly, "Thank you…"

Who knew that would be the start of your beautiful friendship. At your place, Gyomei told you everything he could recall before finding himself in this alien town and you soon realized what had happened.

Based on his story of dying after defeating the evil Demon lord, he must have been isekai'ed! You were pretty familiar with the trope, having read many books and comics and watched many shows related to them.

Of course, Gyomei could have been lying or a crazy person… But he didn't feel like one. He was genuine as were his tears and you felt sympathetic towards him and his situation in a strange world where he knew no one or had nowhere to go.

"Gyomei, I know my home is small… But would you like to stay here until we figure something out?"

"You're offering your place for me to stay at…?" He asked quietly in wonder and you nodded, but realizing he couldn't see, you quickly added, "Yes. I believe you and your story, and you seem like a nice decent guy."

"Namu Amida Butsu…" Gyomei prayed as he pressed his palms together and lowered his head, "Thank you… You're far too kind…"

And so the two of you became roommates and you had been living together for a couple of months already. It took a moment to teach the blind man about how the modern-day stuff worked, but he was eager to learn.

You and Gyomei had a good healthy friendship, the best even what you ever had. He was kind, a good listener and so thoughtful, it was nice spending time with him.

That took you to the current time. It was a nice day, the sun was shining and you and Gyomei were on your way back home from the earlier grocery shopping when he suddenly froze on the spot.

"Gyomei?" You stopped and turned to look at him, "What's wrong?"

"There are… Kids here?"

"Huh?" You blinked as you registered his words before you understood that he must have heard the kids playing outside just next to you."

"Oh yeah! Those sure are kids!"

"There are so many…" He frowned, "They are… They aren't orphans, are they?"

"No, they are kindergarten kids," You replied and Gyomei turned his head towards you, "What are those?"

"Little kids that their parents leave here for a day while they are usually working and can't look after their kids themself."

"Parents can leave their kids to others to look after?"

"It's more common than you would think. Heck, I think I was in kindergarten when I was small."

"I see…" Gyomei nodded as he started to pray silently under his breath.

You hummed as you looked at the kids playing on the other side of the fence and then back at your friend, "Do you like kids Gyomei?"

"I…" He started crying, "I do… I used to take care of orphans…"

"Ah, I see…" You nodded and fell silent, not knowing what to say or do-!

"Look! It's a giant!"

You and Gyomei both blinked and turned to see small kids gathering at the fence to admire your friend and how huge he was.

"Are you a giant?"

"Like a real one?"

"Why are your eyes white?" Kids asked one after another and you were panicking a little, wondering if Gyomei would be okay with these questions, but when you turned to look at your friend, you saw him smiling gently at the kids.

"Why, yes, I'm pretty big, aren't I?" He chuckled and the kids were in total awe. You couldn't help but smile since you weren't used to seeing your friend smiling the way he was doing now.

"Kids, kids!" Came a woman's voice and you looked up to see an older lady approaching the little herd of kids, "Kids, the bell rang, back inside!"

"Look, Miss Cranapple!"

"He's a real giant!"

"He told us so!"

"Ah-!" The woman yelped as she saw Gyomei and he must have heard her because he lowered his head and apologized, "Forgive me, I didn't mean to startle you…"

"O- Oh, it's alright!" Miss Cranapple nodded and you assumed that she was a kindergartner responsible for the kids.

"Kids, it's time to head back inside!"

"Aww!"

"We don't want to!"

"Can the giant come with us?" Kids after another started to whine and beg and you felt a little sorry for the older lady… And then you had an idea.

"Excuse me, Miss Cranapple was it?" You asked and the woman turned to look at you, "Yes, can I help you?"

"You seem to have a lot on your plate right now, am I right?"

"You don't even know the half of it!" She sighed, "My usual co-worker just gave birth to her first child and I haven't managed to find a replacement yet…"

"There was a baby in Miss Raven's belly!" One kid added helpfully.

"Well," You smiled as you pointed at Gyomei, "My friend here really likes kids and actually has experience when it comes to looking after them!"

"Really?" Miss Cranapple looked at your companion who nodded humbly and you quickly added, "Yes! He used to work with kids in the past and they loved him!"

"I see," The woman nodded, "If I may ask, why he isn't still working in his previous place?"

"Ah, that's because the kindergarten was closed due to insufficient funds!" You lied. It was a small lie but a white one so it should be okay?

"And how about your…?" Miss Cranapple grew quiet and you wondered if she wanted to ask about Gyomei's blindness but decided against it.

Finally, she nodded, "Normally we do a very thorough background check… But I trust you. I can't pay much, but if you want the job then I'll take you on a practice run and we can see how we continue from there."

"Namu Amida Butsu…" Gyomei prayed, "Thank you, Miss Cranapple…"

"Thank you," She said right back at him and the kids cheered, unable to hold back their excitement, "Will the giant become our new teacher?"

"Kids, he has a name!" The woman smiled as she looked at your huge friend who nodded with a smile of his own, "My name is Gyomei Himejima, but you can all call me Gyomei."

"Miss Cranapple, can Gyomei come with us?"

"I don't know…" The kindergartner looked at you and your friend, "If you aren't in a hurry, would you like to come and see the kindergarten and how children act?"

"Oh, uh, sure!" You looked at your friend, "What do you say Gyomei? We didn't buy anything that would melt and I believe there is a fridge in here where we can put our groceries?"

"Yes, we have a fridge you can use," Miss Cranapple smiled, and you all looked at Gyomei who could feel your, Cranapple's, and the kids' eyes on him.

"I would love that." He smiled and the kids cheered and you and Gyomei walked around the yard and entered the kindergarten from the front door.

"Kids, since Mister Himejima is going to start here tomorrow, do you have any questions for him?" Miss Cranapple asked as you and Gyomei stood in front of the room full of kids.

"How are you so big?" A boy asked and Gyomei smiled, "I ate a lot."

"What did you eat?"

"Fish and all my vegetables my grandma would put in front of me."

"Do you like animals?"

"I love cats."

"What is your special ability?" A girl asked and the huge man raised a confused brow, "Ability?"

"Like, Pikachu can use electric moves and shoot out lightning bolts!"

"Well, I can't shoot out lighting bolts…" Gyomei smiled, "But I can play Shakuhachi?"

"What's that?" Another kid asked.

"It's a flute made out of bamboo."

"Are you good at it?" One kid asked and Gyomei chuckled, "Good enough that my grandma would smack me with a broom for playing too long."

The kids actually laughed out loud, holding their tummies as they imagined a man as huge as Gyomei being chased by a small grandma with a broom.

You were so happy for Gyomei as you watched kids ask him questions and such. He truly loved kids so this was his dream job.

"Congratulations." Miss Cranapple smiled at you as she walked next to you, "I know this is a little early, but I think your friend would make a great addition to our kindergarten."

"Really?" You asked, and she nodded, "Yes, he is wonderful."

"Thank you, Miss, you won't regret hiring him!" You said cheerfully as you shook hands, "He is my best friend and I will guarantee that he will look after kids like his own!"

"I trust your word and him."

[kashilascorner]

The question is how Thérèse did not kill her husband sooner lol

[nicoleanell]

(actual link to gif set because tumblr's being weird)

Man it's the fact this statement is weirdly big and generous and brave in Armand's mind. I think it was Assad or someone else who said it was a moment of overconfidence or almost gloating, which is not the exact vibe I get, but I think there's something to that big-headedness of having survived and gotten through it and it's over now and just... He just wants to see. He just wants to skip that little stone down the cliff and see what happens. Maybe if nothing happens *then* he would actually be able to exhale. (He will not. He'd find something else. There's an itch in him that's never going to be secure enough in the bed he made.) Maybe it's just wanting to test something - Louis or himself or how many ways he can't die.

People tie it directly to Armand not being able to say the words in 2x05, which is probably intentional, but also it's not *exactly* the same because for one thing it's in the Past Tense now. It's very much meant as a moment of *closure* - he DID love you, past tense, we don't know where he is or how he feels now and that doesn't matter - while in San Francisco with Lestat right there on the mind telephone, it was the present tense terror that maybe that really was all Louis needed to hear to go running back to him.

But their relationship has also changed SO dramatically since San Francisco that it feels like even the past-tense version is a very, very precarious thing to admit. Because it's not about the material love triangle, it's not who-will-Bella-Swan-choose, it's about 70 years of mythmaking and storytelling.

SIDEBAR: The show left us IMO with a very frustrating ambiguity about the extent to which Armand has used his mind powers on Louis, like to the point where you have some fans believing that *every single fucking memory* we saw onscreen that they didn't like for the last two seasons is Fake News actually, and other fans believing it happened Just That One Time GOD. (I personally lean toward way *less* mind manipulation than other people assume, and if it was literally JUST the shit that happened in 1973 that's... enough to be messed up lol. I think the "love of my life" and finishing each other's sentences scenes have some unsettling implications. I *don't* think Louis having imperfect recall and limited perspective of stuff that happened a century ago is because of Armand all or even *most* of the time.)

But the fact no matter what is that Louis has a lot of cognitive dissonance around Lestat because he WANTS it acknowledged on some bone-deep level that Lestat loved him, because he loved/continues to love him too. And if we're gonna insist on throwing the word "gaslighting" around when we just mean "lying", then at the end of the day it's about Louis being told he's not crazy by someone who has at times made him feel that way.

Idk maybe this is me getting Too Deep about a finale I still think is kinda unsatisfying and already had way too much to do with Lestat and not enough with Claudia. But I do like that moment when I look past the toxic love triangle and more toward "hey buddy [my best friend Armand] why are you Like That" and Louis' little smile breaking my heart.

Something sad about that moment is Armand's right that saying those words *doesn't* end the world, and if nothing else had happened and Daniel and the Vampire CIA weren't on their divorce-attorney kick, that'd be the end of it. (Hot take I don't think saying the words or not in 1973 would've really made a difference either, and there's so much more nuanced and wild shit going on there than an undelivered message romcom beat.) And Louis would be *grateful* for that moment of understanding and closure between them.

[brujc]

TBHK122 (spoilers!) 🌕🧪

I loved this chapter. When I say loved I mean LOVED-

Starting off strong with Hanako! Long time no see~

And professor Yugi. I fear he totally mogged Hanako. Scrumptious art, amazing colors and it gives off such a vibe y'know? With the blue and green scheme, tentacles (that are hella cool omg) and chemistry them it looks amazing! Professor Yugi veeery different from Hanako and I just love everything that revolves around him!

These two illustration are so mystery-ish. Like with the window and clock behind them it makes it look like they're straight out from a detective game? Reminds me of really early tbhk, I missed this!

*********

Anyway back onto the chapter!

Let's say I'm super happy with what we got this month! To be honest, I think that getting a bit of a pause in the story was the best thing they could've happened. Like getting a bit of time to rest and prepare for what's to come and most importantly getting some focus on our protagonist's train of thoughts!!

Focusing on Nene alone is super interesting since she was kinda on the sidelines in the previous chapters and with all the crazy stuff that happened and all the responsibility falling on her shoulders... Seeing her processing everything was really needed.

Getting this scene? I was soooo HAPPY. Her just being helpless for a moment cuz she's been holding it to stay strong for so long.

She's just a normal person in the end, with everyone's lives on her shoulders, a task to accomplish when she doesn't know how and above everything she's all by herself this time. She always had someone to rely on before, but not anymore. No one to guide her. No one to save her. No one by her side. So she breaks down and god yeah how I wanted to see this! I'm literally crying tears of joy.

TSU.CHI.GO.MO.RI IS BAAAACK. Him being the one to appear and offer reassurance to Nene during this "break" in the course of events is really peak. Cuz y'know, maybe it's just me but teachers always have something reassuring about them. Like they're adults and I guess having an adult with you makes you feel safe? It's like...they're supposed to have control on any situation (or rather give off this impression), and handle stuff you can't when you're a kid(?) And Tsuchigomori is just the kind of teacher that gives off vibes that make you feel safe and makes you look...out of the frame and think of what you can do instead of how you can't??? Idk if I make sense lol. So yeah having this kind of calm character running into Nene when she's in such a difficult situation is amazing.

Her having a hard time accepting Hanako's fate in this timeline is so...on point. She doesn't want to think about it. She won't accept that the person Hanako got to become in the future murdered her friends. Not Hanako. Not the playful boy she could always rely on. Not the one person that made true love bloom in her heart for the first time.

She doesn't know everything, so she probably doesn't know the person she confronted in the red house isn't exactly who Amane grew up to be (if we're assuming professor Yugi isn't aware at 100% of what he's doing/ possessed or at least not in the "right" state of mind). So she probably just thinks Hanako becomes this and she's horrified..

Nene at the start not recognizing "Yugi Amane" as her Hanako

Her recognizing him as the same person as "Hanako"

Okay fuck this shit is so confusing I probably don't make any sense to y'all idk wich terms to use for wich amane I'm taking about cuz they are way too many versions of them

Anyway

Tsuchigomori reconforting Nene was amazingggg. Doesn't pry too just offers confort, did exactly what Nene needed here.

(also Nene mentions that she doesn't recall having cocoa in this room?? Could it be an addition made for Professor Yugi?)

Tsuchigomori learning Amane's old tricks?? I'm exploding from happiness (always longed to see a friendship between Tsuchi and Amane not as mysteries but teachers and I got fed so well this chapter)

What a sweet guy. He looked so happy...i want to see more professor Yugi now :(

Nene getting feeling calmed, amazing.

Perfect conclusion to this small Nene-focused break! I can't wait to see her in action with the clock keepers!!!

[avochele]

The Idol - Ruby Red.

tags. idol!woozi x idol!oc, fluff, angst

headquarter.

Track #2.

synopsis. In wich a girl has a way too personal connection to a ceiling fan and in wich people need to learn that not everything is what it appears to be.

“People desire me. Because of red. Especially men. I became an object of desire. An object of love. An object that was made through the colour of red. I am red.”

warnings. toxic fans, obsession, anxiety, objectification(?), stalking, blood, obsessive crazy and toxic fans, oc is a simp for woozi (but honestly who isn't?), both are hopelessly in love and too dense to notice, I have no idea how recording a song or being an idol works so please excuse my messy excuse of a song production etc., obsessive fan incidents inspired by tvxq's sasaeng incidents (because no one in their right mind could come up with stuff like that) (more will be added if needed.)

note. guys i'm alive! i did not abandon this I promise. for some more aesthetically pleasing story you might want to check out my wattpad. i'm trying to update more regularly now but i can't promise anything. thank you always for supporting!

The room I’m in does not have a fan. Not surprising. Honestly.

I’ve been staring at Beomjus back for a good thirty minutes now. I can’t concentrate.

I couldn’t think of anything else besides yesterday night. Everytime i recall him I start seeing red specks everywhere. But this time it’s weird. They’re not overwhelming. Not too pushy.

They’re like a background noise. Always there but never too much. Never annoying. Just right. Just there.

Like people talking in a restaurante. Like my laundry machine turning. Like the sound of tires on asphalt. Barely noticeable but always aware that it’s there.

I’m warm. When thinking of him something like red heat creeps up my neck. Burning almost. But not hurting. Nor uncomfortable.

Weird. When was the last time it hasn’t made me uncomfortable? I don’t remember.

"Are you listening?“ I bite down on my thumb nail. I really should stop doing that.

"Byeol?“ How can someone be so pretty and not brag about it all the time?

"Byeol!“

"Yes?“ I look up. Beomju looks at me, his mouth forming a straight line. "Did you listen to anything I just said?“ he questions me.

I avoid eye contact, I have in fact not been listening. How could I with the red ruling over my thoughts. "Do you mind repeating?“ I ask carefully, pushing my glasses back onto my head, keeping my hair from falling into my face.

"I said we can start recording.“ He watches me as I get up grabbing the lyric sheet in front of me. "Are you okay?“ he asks as I open the door to the recording booth. "Yeah why?“ I ask him, my hand resting on the doorknob.

"You seem a little out of it. A little distracted.“ He says, leaning back in his chair. I shrug. "I’m fine.“ I say not wanting to admit that I in fact am distracted. But he doesn’t need to know why. I doubt that he believes me anyway when I say I'm not. I close the door, leaving all possible distractions on the other side.

I put the lyric sheet on the note stand and put my headphones on, readjusting my glasses on the bridge of my nose.

The next two hours are filled with singing, repeating, harmonising and repeating again until Beomju decides to take a break. We‘ve been making huge progress the last few days. Besides memorising the choreography until it‘s engraved inside of me like blood running through my veins. We‘ve finished recording the majority of the album, with only three b-sides left.

At some point Seungkwan had entered the studio and made himself comfortable on Beomjus couch. He apparently was supposed to bring him some notes of a demo song for SEVENTEEN. Now he‘s lounging around like he doesn‘t have a care in the world.

I let myself fall down next to him and take a big swig out of my water bottle. "Why are you here?“ I ask him, pushing my glasses up. I didn‘t see a reason for him to still be here after he succeeded in his mission to bring the notes.

"Jihoon Hyung told me to bring the notes and bother someone else.“ I almost choke on my water at the mention of my friends bandmates name. And I thought I had successfully banished him from my thoughts for the time being.

I nod absentmindedly. Seungkwan must have noticed that I won‘t be answering anytime soon. “Do you guys want to grab dinner somewhere, after you finish recording?“ he asks, brushing his bangs out of his eyes.

"Sure, why not?“ I shrug, pushing my thoughts of his attractive friend to the back. But not away.

We both look expectantly at Beomju. He had his chair turned towards us, following our conversation. "I can‘t. I got some more work after this.“ He gestures to the stack of paper Seungkwan had put on his desk earlier.

"So it‘s just us?“ I ask him, taking another sip. He thinks for a moment. "Do you mind if some of my members join us? They haven‘t had dinner yet.“

I blink at him.

If Woozi‘s coming I doubt I‘ll be able to even make it to the dinner place, without crashing the car.

"Sure.“ I say trying to not mind my heart's fastened pace as I think of what he might look like from across the table, under the cozy orange light and through the steam of the sizzling hotpot.

"Cool, I‘ll ask them.“ I nod. My water bottle is empty now.

"Continue?“ I ask Beomju, who is typing away on his phone, as I try to flee my very attractive thoughts. "If you‘re done talking, sure.“ he says, putting his phone to the side.

As I note Seungkwan's disinterest in continuing the conversation, I get up with a deep breath and grab another bottle from the cooler. I make a mental note to get Beomju new water the next time I see him and close the recording booth door behind me.

Drowning the few leftover red specks, as well as Seungkwan's babbling over what to get for dinner, out.

The dinner place right next to the Han River is relatively empty. It had been pouring for an hour now and there was no sign of it stopping anytime soon.

The round table we’re sitting at is filled with numerous side dishes and a steaming hot pot in the middle. We are sitting at the very back corner of the tent.

The air is slightly damp and I’m almost hundred percent sure there is a puddle forming under my feet.

To my luck Woozi had not joined us when we had left. I didn’t know whether to be happy or slightly disappointed.

"This is so good, I can’t believe we never went here.“ Seokmin says from across the table. I grin into the bowl in front of me.

"Yeah I can’t believe you never took me here.“ Seungkwan says with a mouth full of rice. I raise my eyebrows at his accusing tone. "I couldn’t stand the thought of having to see your face everytime I come here.“

Joshua lets out a loud laugh at my statement. Seungkwan scowls at him.

"Here, stop pouting.“ I say, passing him a spoon full of rice, pork and kimchi. He eats it reluctantly.

Behind Dokyeom and Chan, two girls started whispering to each other looking in our direction. Instinctively I pull my baseball cap a bit more into my face.

I normally don’t mind meeting fans randomly, but it’s different when I’m out with other Idols. The rumours seem to write themselves.

I take a closer look at them, trying to make it not too obvious. They seem to be in middle school. I look at my phone. The time reads 10:46pm. What are middle schoolers doing at this time still out?

I don’t think they’ll do anything out of the ordinary, but I still couldn’t stop myself from looking over to them from time to time. They must have seen us leaving the car and followed us here.

Joshua next to me must have noticed them too as he moves a little closer to Chan and away from me.

There is no doubt they don’t know who we are. The only thing we can do now is to try to avoid starting rumours. Damage control, Taeja would call it.

The plates have been emptied by now and everyone is just talking away. I catch a few crumbs about the comeback, music shows and toothpaste?

As the night went on the restaurant tent emptied more and more until the only people left were the middle school girls, a group of middle aged men and us.

I wondered if the girls left if we did. I don’t want them to sit alone at this time with the men. Even though they probably followed us here.

"I think we should go, it’s kinda late. I promised my manager to sleep early today.“ I say, looking at the boys. "Since when do you listen to her?“ Seungkwan asks, confused as to why I want to leave so suddenly.

"Since now.“

The girls had left short after us. I saw them leave the tent from our parking spot. I felt relieved seeing them walk towards the train station. If for our safety or theirs I’m not sure. I just hope they didn’t get into too much trouble for coming home late.

The hallway to my apartment is quiet. I look at my phone as I round the corner. Seungkwan had sent me a picture of him and the guys. They got some takeout at the restaurant for the members that stayed at the company.

I suppose my secret place isn‘t so secret anymore. But that‘s okay. I don‘t eat there that often anyway. Makes it more special. Might be nice going there with other people for once.

I pull at my shirt. It sticks to my body. We got wet when walking back to my car. My straightened hair had surrendered to the curls now flowing down my back. I’m cold. Even though the hallway is warm I feel a chill clinging to my back. Crawling up my neck, waiting for the perfect moment to attack.

I narrow my eyebrows at the sight in front of me. There‘s a little elephant plushie leaning against my door. I crouch down in front of it, turning it around in my hands. "What are you doing here?“ I ask quietly.

Subconsciously I turn to look at the apartment door at the end of the hallway. A family of four lives there. He is a doctor and she a lawyer. They have twins. A girl and a boy. Maybe it belongs to them?

I decide it‘s too late now to ask them as I check the time on my phone. 1:37am. I get up.

From the corner of my eye I notice movement. My head snaps around. The hallway ends in that direction. There's a big picture on the wall. The green and gold specks makes it look harder to make as it probably was. It‘s the first thing you see when you leave the elevator. Next to it is a plant. But other than that nothing.

Must have been the fatigue.

Still with my phone and the blue elephant in my hand I punch in the code to my apartment and go inside. The door closes with a short melody as I take my shoes off.

I place the elephant on the table in my living room. I make a mental note to return it tomorrow. I‘m sure they miss it already.

As I get into bed I feel like something's off. Like I missed something. As if the chill is sitting in a corner waiting for an opportunity.

And all of a sudden the red is back. Drowning my vision and making my heart beat all the faster. I try to distract myself.

Turning on my music. Answering messages. Looking through the pictures we took earlier. Nothing changed.

Realising I won‘t reach the quiet I‘d like to reach in my head. I place my phone on the nightstand, putting on a different playlist.

The red never leaving my mind. My heart beats faster. Sleep comes hard that night.

TAGLIST. @hazeljisulatte @thepoopdokyeomtouched @berriebeetles @rvebyntvr @neivivenaj @cookiearmy

This work will be simultaneo publsihed on my Wattpad [click here].

©AVOCHELE, 2024

All rights reserved. This story or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a story review.

[hometoursandotherstuff]

Fans Confused After Alison Victoria Lists ‘Dream Home’ For Sale. Wait. Her GA loft didn't sell, and she was supposed to be selling that to finance a new place in the Cabbagetown section of Chicago. Now, I'm confused, too. Anyway, this is an ugly ass building. The 4bd, 3.5ba, property is listed for $3.5M. Let's have a look (if you recall, Alison is the designer who did the "Ugliest House" I posted yesterday.)

Victoria worked to transform her office space into a residential home, which she envisioned as “the biggest, the baddest, the sexiest live-work dream home I could ever imagine.”

Although she’s called it her “Dream Home” home for several months now, fans online noticed that Victoria is quietly planning to part ways with her live-work space. What is going on?

She has posted photos from her dream home as recently as April 9, just before the building hit the real estate market. Well, I like the muted green chairs and planters. The floor is reminiscent of Alice in Wonderland.

One fan brought the home’s listing to an HGTV fan community on Reddit, where other users chimed in with their thoughts about the sale. (I'm an avid Redditor.)

“I thought she was building this to be her dream home/workspace? Or was this always to sell right away?” one fan wondered, with another guessing in response, “In reality it was always just content for her show.”

So, that's just a mantel with candles, then.

“I don’t think many people would be interested in buying this but it might work for someone who has a business and can live on the premises like what she claimed it was intended for," said another fan.

"I think more than likely it would be an event space esp for a wedding w/the option to stay overnight," said a 3rd fan.

Interesting wall with the big niche for decor, oven and 2 wine fridges.

One user pointed out in the comments, “There are no windows! I’d go crazy ! No, the sky lights not enough." Yeah, it's like an underground house.

Shoot, no matter how nice it is, I like the lighted shelving, no windows is a deal breaker. I'd feel imprisoned.

Interesting en-suite.

“The closets are full of clothes and shoes. Not staged stuff, real stuff," said a fan.

Nice little home theater lobby with a snack counter.

This is it? I was expecting a home theater, not a TV room.

Interesting light strand in the powder room.

Long hall to the wide industrial stairs.

One of the other bedrooms. I can't deal with just skylights, I gotta see what the weather's like and all.

One of the other baths. My love of floating sinks is kind of leery of something this big. I feel like it would break loose eventually.

"The mudroom looks like it has a little kid's jackets or maybe they’re just tiny women’s jackets. regardless, it looks like Alison or a family is living there. Interesting,” another fan pointed out.

Exercise depresses me enough, let alone doing it in this room.

I'm gonna say that this is the work area, where the team gathers to discuss design. Interesting that this is the area that has the windows.

The garages in the back of the building.

I'm no designer, but this building wouldn't have appealed to me as a home/work space. I would look for an end unit with more windows.

https://heavy.com/entertainment/hgtv/alison-victoria-lists-dream-home-sale/

https://www.coldwellbankerhomes.com/il/chicago/2733-n-pulaski-rd/pid_58881660/