#and it’s 10 pm and I’m tired and NOT handling this well
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Found out my Irreplaceable souvenir favorite mug broke in my move. Killing myself for real
#I trusted my dad to pack it and he didn’t pack it carefully enough#and he’s excessively careful with other things so this was a surprise#and it’s 10 pm and I’m tired and NOT handling this well#bc it was one of the things I stressed to him was important to me to pack carefully and bring home#it was a souvenir from the colosseum from my short 2020 study abroad in Rome that ended abruptly from Covid#almost one calendar year ago I broke my other irreplaceable souvenir mug
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chapter thirteen



pairing- bang chan x OC (Chi Nakamura) genre- angst, hurt/comfort, slow burn romance word count- ~1.6k warnings- emotionally charged confrontation, a little bit of spice (closed door), (implied) aftercare. a/n- Hope you enjoy the ache and softness in equal measure. 🖤
By 10:15, she’d given up waiting. She shut her phone off completely—no more buzzes, no more notifications, no more new followers, no more strangers commenting on her face.
The world could spin without her tonight.
She paced her apartment barefoot, still wearing the clothes from work. Flour smudged on her sleeve. Coffee stain on her shirt. The kind of day where she hadn’t had time to notice. Or care.
She poured herself a glass of water. Didn’t drink it.
Stared out the window, watching the streetlights blink.
It was quiet here. Her apartment had always been quiet. Safe. A few succulents on the sill. A messy bookshelf. Mismatched mugs. She’d built it all herself. No cameras. No filters.
Just Chi.
And now the internet knew her name. Her face. Her laugh. Her kiss.
Her phone stayed off.
The knock came at 10:41 PM.
She didn’t move at first. Just stared at the door, heart hammering. A second knock followed—harder this time. Urgent.
She grabbed her phone. Still off.
Then heard it:
“Chi. It’s me.”
His voice. Muffled through the door.
Her blood ran cold.
“Please open up.”
She hesitated. Her hand hovered over the handle.
And then, even though she did not know why—she did it.
Chris looked like hell.
Hoodie up. No mask. Eyes red. Hair a mess. One hand in his pocket like he was trying to keep himself together.
“Hi,” he said, breathless. “I know. I know you don’t want to see me. But I—”
“What are you doing here?” she asked, stepping back. Her voice was sharp. “Are you insane? You showed up at my door at night—without telling me—and you think that’s okay?”
“I didn’t know what else to do,” he said. “You weren’t answering, and I was losing my mind.”
“Good,” she snapped. “You should.”
She turned away, but he followed her inside.
“I didn’t come to fight—”
“Well, too bad,” she bit out, spinning to face him. “Because I’ve been fighting all day. With myself. With strangers. With my coworkers whispering behind my back. With fans filming me while I tried to make a fucking latte. So yeah, Chris, maybe it’s your turn.”
He opened his mouth. Closed it. Looked away.
“I never wanted this to happen like that,” he said quietly. “It wasn’t planned. It was just… us.”
“It wasn’t just us,” she said. Her voice cracked. “It stopped being just us the second someone recorded it.”
He flinched.
She kept going. “You could’ve warned me. Told me what might happen. Anything. But you didn’t. You kissed me like no one was watching. And then when everyone was—you went silent.”
“I was trying to protect you,” he said.
“No, you were trying to protect yourself. Your image. Your contract. Your clean PR file.” She laughed bitterly. “And you still couldn’t even do that right.”
His jaw tightened. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“Act like you know how any of this works.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” she shot back, voice rising. “Was I supposed to read the K-pop girlfriend handbook before getting kissed in public by an idol?”
“I didn’t mean for this to happen!” he yelled suddenly.
Silence followed. Thick. Shaking.
Chi stared at him. “But it did. And you didn’t think about me until it was already too late.”
He looked down. Hands trembling now. “That’s not true.”
“No?” she whispered.
And then—something broke in him.
“I loved that moment,” he said. “That kiss. I was tired of hiding. Tired of pretending like I didn’t care about you in public. I just wanted—one second where it felt real. Where I didn’t have to lie.”
Her breath caught.
“I know I messed it up,” he said. “I know I should’ve told you how bad it could get. But I was selfish. I just… I wanted you more than I wanted to be careful.”
The words hung between them.
Chi’s eyes burned.
“And now look at you,” she whispered. “Standing in my apartment like an idiot while my life crumbles because of a kiss you couldn’t keep private.”
He looked up. And suddenly, she could see all of it—his guilt, his fear, his love—bleeding through his eyes.
“You think I don’t hate myself for that?” he said, voice hoarse. “You think this hasn’t been killing me all day?”
Then: “I thought you were gone.”
Something in her cracked wide open.
“I almost was. I don´t want to do it like this, chris. i don´t want to-"
Chris moved before she could finish.
His hands cupped her face, rough and shaky, and he kissed her.
It wasn’t soft. It wasn’t sweet. It was desperate. Apologetic. A thousand emotions shoved into one impossible act.
She shoved at his chest. “Don’t—”
He kissed her again. Her tears were still falling. Her hands still trembled.
But her mouth opened under his, because God help her, she missed him too.
Everything in her screamed not to. But her body didn’t listen.
His mouth was warm, familiar, frantic. His hands buried in her hair. Her nails dug into his hoodie, pulling him closer even as she burned with anger.
He broke away just enough to say, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” before kissing her again, harder this time, like he could make it true with his mouth.
She pulled him toward her without thinking, walking backward, guiding him toward the bedroom because if they were going to burn everything down, she wanted it to happen where no one could watch.
Her knees hit the edge of the mattress.
She didn’t stop.
His hoodie hit the floor first, yanked over his head with shaking hands.
Then her shirt, tugged off in one breathless motion.
They didn’t speak. They didn’t need to.
Every kiss was a clash — desperate, raw, full of everything they hadn’t said. Her tears streaked down her face, but he didn’t pull away. He kissed through them — her cheeks, her jaw, her throat. Then lower. Her collarbone, her shoulder, the swell of her chest. His hands followed, firm and reverent, like he was learning her body by heart.
He whispered her name over and over, like it was the only prayer he knew.
When he finally hovered over her, breath shallow, eyes wide and dark, he paused.
“Tell me to stop,” he said, voice cracking.
She shook her head.
“Chi. Say it.”
Her fingers curled into his back. “I don’t want you to stop,” she whispered.
She pulled him down, and he listened.
The room was quiet. Only the hum of traffic outside and the rustle of bedsheets filled the silence.
Chi lay on her back, hair damp against the pillow, chest rising and falling in slow, unsteady waves. Chris was beside her, one arm draped gently across her stomach, the other propping him up as he watched her like she might vanish if he blinked too long.
She hadn’t spoken in a while. He hadn’t pushed.
Instead, he moved slowly, carefully — brushing her hair back, running his knuckles along her cheek, pressing a kiss to the space between her eyebrows like it was a promise.
“You okay?” he asked, voice quiet.
Chi blinked. “I don’t know yet.”
Chris nodded, like he understood. “Can I get you something?”
She hesitated. “Water?”
He was already climbing out of bed. He moved like he was still in a dream — bare feet on cool hardwood, tugging his hoodie back on halfway, grabbing the glass she hadn’t touched earlier and filling it from the kitchen.
When he came back, he handed it to her with both hands, like it mattered.
“Thanks,” she murmured, sipping slowly. He sat beside her again, this time pulling the blanket up higher around her shoulders, tucking it under her chin.
She watched him for a second, confused. “What are you doing?”
“Taking care of you,” he said simply.
She didn’t know what to say to that.
Chris leaned back against the headboard, letting out a shaky breath. “I fucked up so badly.”
“Yeah,” she said, honest but not cruel.
“But I’m still here,” he added. “If you’ll let me be.”
Chi shifted, curling closer, resting her head on his chest. He pulled her in, strong arms wrapping around her like he’d been waiting for this exact moment to breathe again.
“You really didn’t know someone was recording?” she asked against his skin.
“No,” he said. “I swear. If I had, I would've— God, Chi, I never would've let that happen. I would’ve moved mountains to keep that moment ours.”
Her fingers gripped his hoodie. “They’re never gonna unsee it.”
“I know.”
“They think I’m this… homewrecker. Clout chaser. A girl who got lucky.”
He looked down at her. “You're the girl I chose.”
She blinked hard.
“You didn’t ask for this. I did. I kissed you because I couldn’t hold it in anymore. Because I love you, and I was tired of pretending that I didn’t.”
Her breath hitched. “What...? Say it again.”
“I love you.”
She didn’t say it back. Not yet. But her fingers slid into his, locking them tight.
He kissed the top of her head. “You don’t have to decide anything tonight. Or tomorrow. But I’m not going anywhere.”
“I don’t want to do this alone,” she whispered.
“You won’t.”
They stayed like that for a long time. Tangled together under warm sheets. Her cheek against his chest. His heartbeat steady beneath her ear.
Eventually, she yawned — tiny, soft — and he smiled.
“Sleep,” he said gently. “I’ve got you.”
“You’ll still be here in the morning?”
“Try and get rid of me.”
She let out the tiniest laugh. “Bold talk for a man whose ass I’m gonna kick when I wake up.”
Chris grinned. “Looking forward to it.”
And for the first time in what felt like forever, they both closed their eyes — not to escape, but to rest.
They weren’t perfect. The world was still loud. But here, in this quiet, dimly lit room, they were okay.
And maybe tomorrow, they still would be.
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Capítulo 10
- Mafin rewatch (Sueños de Libertad)
I’ve seen these episodes before, so why am I so excited to see what happens next?
Super subtle Fina hiding her letter to Esther from Carmen who sees right through her. I like that now as we have been firmly introduced to Fina, gotten to know her a bit, sympathize with her and develop compassion for her - when those things are in place, now we establish that Petra was not some kind of exception. Petra wasn’t a brief moment of madness, or a one-off. No, Fina might be young, but not inexperienced when it comes to love and she already has a very firm grasp on what her sexuality means (for her at least, I’m not sure she’s got that firm an understanding of what it means to others, but I’m getting ahead of the story). So already it's made clear that with Fina we are not going to see a sexual awakening. Instead we are going to follow a young woman who already knows herself very well. Refreshing for a period drama.
It’s also made clear that Fina has a temperament and she has no problems letting it come out to play, even with her closest friends and family. Carmen though, she is just kind of perfect, she’s calm and understanding and doesn’t push, but makes it clear that she is there for Fina and whatever might be on her mind. If she wants her to be that is. Not in the least bothered by the fire in Fina’s emotional outbursts. Carmen could hold a masterclass in handling Fina's moods and future!Marta should definitely spend some of that family money on attending. It would be beneficial for her, Fina and my blood pressure.
Eventually Fina mellows, but she is not quite able to say the words to Carmen, instead rather handing her the written letter to explain everything - that hits a familiar spot. My first coming out was pretty much exactly that, except it was digital, but I just couldn’t seem to dare let the words leave my lips, but from my fingertips they flowed with a desperation born out of wanting and needing to share it with someone before carrying it in silence would make me implode.
It’s fucking bold though, Fina’s just been called sick and had someone threaten to call the police on her when they found out she was a lesbian, but here she is around two and a half hours later and she’s already spilling the beans again. Fits with Fina though, spontaneous and without the safety net of consequence thinking most of the rest of us have been gifted with.
Aww, Carmen, maybe I’m pms-ing, but my eyes are suddenly a bit moist. Her wholehearted acceptance of Fina, the open arms and the bear hug makes me a bit weepy. There are moments when I am so certain there is at least one gay in that writers room and when Carmen mentioned how lonely this must have made Fina - yeah, those aren’t the words of a straight. Those are the words of someone who gets it. Of someone writing their utopian coming out scenario. It’s a bit gratuitous but fuck if I don’t love it.
It’s also nice that Fina is tired from the start. It’s episode 10 and she’s come straight out and said the words. She is tired of having to hide her sexuality. Of having to hide something which is such a big part of who she is. I get her, my sexuality is not my personality, but my personality wouldn’t be what it is without my sexuality. So I get it. I do. She doesn’t want to hide even though on the one hand she understands she needs to, but she definitely comes across as the kind of woman hell-bent on forming the world around her into what she requires of it. She does not want to hide. She knows it’s not easy or even a good idea, but she will find a way to live the kind of life she wants and she will do it openly. And that’s something we’re seeing time and time again. Common sense might tell you to stay closeted, but Fina does not care for it, rather she will beat her own path into submission and with great conviction tell those around her to accept it, because that is simply the way things will go. It won't be an easy path, but despite being knocked down on numerous occasions we see no signs of her actually backing down.
Luis making metaphors about his perfume and falling in love - how convenient, yes please plant those ideas in Marta’s head. He’s coming up with all of those comparisons of a spark turning into a fire and so far he’s got Marta's attention, it looks like what he’s saying is - it’s triggering emotions inside of her. She's listening.
However, when he asks Marta what it was about her husband that made her fall in love - it all shuts down. What he then gets is an awkward reaction of “I can’t remember that”, that gay back of the neck scratch and a quick dismissal of personal questions as she rushes him to get down to business. Looks like someone has a sore spot in her arranged marriage of inconvenience and maybe she can understand infatuation, but not if she's forced to apply it to her husband. Interesting.
Yeah, I know what’s going to be happening, but I’m still excited for it.
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10:29 pm
Hwang Hyunjin x female reader / words / angst / fluff
Warnings: mentions of death
⊱ ───────���──────────────── ⊰
Tired. All he wanted was to leave this forsaken world and he reunited with his forgotten family after many years. That’s all he could think about, until he met you. You showed up one day questioning his intentions after asking a series of random questions. How could a stranger be so forward? Yet he didn’t mind answering for some odd reason.
Sooner or later, the thoughts of leaving this world began to fade. He began to see the colors of life again the more he hung out with you. It didn’t seem so dull and bland.
“Jinnie, hold my hand please?” You asked politely, extending your hand searching for his.
Hyunjin gladly obliged, taking your warm hand in his, “Do you think the night sky has always been this pretty?”
You hummed to yourself as if you were thinking about it, “I think it’s what you make it to be. If you want to say it’s dull, then it will be. If you want it to be beautiful, then it shall,” You moved, pulling your boyfriend to sit by the river to watch the stars, “I know our loved ones are watching over us. You can tell by the twinkling stars. It’s them waving to us and showing they are okay up there.”
Hyunjin’s breath hicked a bit, knowing you were right, but still not used to speaking so freely about his dead parents. You, on the other hand, had lost your brother and sister in a terrible car accident, making your parent’s resent you for being the only one to survive. Though your parents were still alive, you were dead to them. Even so, you always kept a smile on your face and had a positive attitude. That’s what Hyunjin admired so much about you.
“I know your siblings are proud of you. I’m proud of you. You’ve held on so long and have been so strong for yourself and for others. For me,” He smiled at you, noticing your teary eyes as you kept that cute smile on your face, “You can cry. Crying is healthy. Mourning is healthy.”
You tilted your head towards the sky to try and dry your eyes, “It’s been so long, I don’t know if I even know how to mourn their deaths anymore. I can only see the happiness on their faces when we would play outside or when we would go get take out as a treat for being good. That’s what I want to remember, not the terrible tragedy that consumed them,” You whispered with a smile as tears slowly spilled down your cheeks.
“I love you Jinnie,” You smiled facing him as his breath caught in his throat. That was the first time you had ever confessed it him, even though he knew.
He felt tears well in his eyes as he place a hand on your cheek, “I love you more. More than you’ll ever know.”
You sniffed a bit before letting a chuckle out, “What is it?” He asked with curiosity in his tone.
“I just know your parents are eavesdropping on us and smiling up there. Maybe my sibling met your parents and are having a watch party or something,” You chuckled to yourself as tears still spilled, making Hyunjin’s heart strings pull.
He pulled you into his warm chest for comfort before placing a kiss to the top of your head, “I bet they are, and I bet they are over the moon with joy about the amazing person I met and love. They would have loved you.”
You tilted your head to look him in the eyes, “My siblings would have loved you too,” You smiled happily though the tears.
Even after all the tragedy the two of you went through, you finally found your other halves, making the lose a bit easier to handle.
⊱ ──────────────────────── ⊰
- Admin 🦋
#stray kids#hwang hyunjin#kwritersworldnet#stray kids hyunjin#hyunjin fluff#hyunjin angst#stray kids scenarios#stray kids masterlist#stray kids timestamps#stray kids reactions#stray kids imagines#stray kids blurbs#stray kids angst#stray kids fluff#stray kids drabbles
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Medical ramblings under the cut,
So I was talking to my doctor that treats my adhd and deals with the dosage of my adderall and whatnot, and last month I said I felt like it wasn’t working as well and she asked if I wanted to try a higher dosage and I said I wanted to wait another month to see if it was just a blip due to work or whatever
Well I was chatting with her during our recent appointment and I was like no I think my dose is fine, I ended up starting my period a few days later. I laughed and then she started asking questions about my pms symptoms
I’m like yeah I get really anxious over everything, really tired, bad leg cramps and Charlie horses, cravings, mood swings, lots of near crying or sobbing or whatever, and I do this thing where I think everyone hates me, I can’t handle any sort of criticism without feeling terrible, you know the normal stuff and it goes away when my period is done (the tiredness lasts a bit longer but that’s probably due to my blood thinners and having a period)
And she goes, this is one of those things much like your adhd in the past where you think something is normal and ignore it when it is certainly not the normal experience.
So long story short apparently I have something called pmdd or premenstrual dysmorphic disorder, and there’s a high comorbidity with adhd
She prescribed a low dose of Prozac (she had a different one she wanted to prescribe but apparently it doesn’t mix well with blood thinners) to take the week to 10 days before my period as well as the heavier flow days
Now the only problem is I’m super irregular and sometimes I get the pms (or I guess pmdd) symptoms and then they go away with no period. So we’re going to track as best we can, she said there’s a possibility that my body is doing the same hormonal phase as normal but then skipping the period part and moving to the next phase but she isn’t a gyno lol
Anyway she said birth control pills could help or even copper iud but can’t take bc pills due to the hormones and the iud while I technically could have it without being at risk for a blood clot, my hematologist said it was a bad idea in case it ruptured because of internal bleeding woooo
All of this to say I took my adderall this morning and mid afternoon like I normally do, and decided to try the Prozac after work because it said possible drowsiness and let me just say yep, I’m barely awake feels like I took a Benadryl, so it is a night time only pill for sure.
My kid just fell asleep so now I can crash.
Ngl being a girl sucks ass sometimes lol, if we could just skip the shitty hormone drops and raises that would be nice
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We’re up to no good, ya want in?
■ Datacenter | Crystal – Balmung
■ Playtime | Approx. 6 pm to 10 pm EST
■ You must be 21+ | Mature themes RP
This is a rather specific kind of LFRP post. The goal is to find 2 or 3-ish (or more, who knows!) people to RP and plot with (alongside with my RP partner). I (we) are open to plot or event ideas, character hooks, pre-established relationships/rivals, you name it. What we’re looking for:
Thavnair-centric - It doesn’t matter if your character is not Thavnairian or spend times outside the region; tbh our own “adventures” take us outside this nation regularly, but we always come back to Thavnair or, more specifically, we work FOR (the betterment of) Thavnair.
Morally gray - Don’t mistake this for evil; However, we’re not completely good either. Sometimes you have to bend the law, or walk carefully under it, in order to survive (or become the lesser of two evils). We try to help others, or ourselves, but life has a way to hand out lemons by the crates and making lemonade ain’t cheap.
Flight before fight - We tend to play more like civilians and a lot of our stories revolve around white collar crime. Not that our characters can’t handle being in a fight, but if it comes to that (and if the opportunity is there) I know of at least one of us that will try to run for it before engaging in combat >_>;;;; *cough* Hunting beasts and monsters, however, is something else entirely.
Lore compliance, realism and low power - This is our brand. We don’t want people who can solve everything single-handedly, who have enough IC wealth to buy off a whole residential district and pull all the favors, or can heal everything with the snap of their fingers. Where’s the fun in that? We like to eat dirt, chew it and spit it out (not for all three meals mind you, it lacks proteins).
Love for writing - And we mean that in the broadest possible way. It includes plotting, writing events and stories for our characters. They can be very centric to one or many characters - we’re all about character development - or to a group (we have Jijivisha). If you just want to sit and enjoy the chocobo ride, look elsewhere, ‘cause we ain’t even got any chocobos.
The small prints
■ Our RP style is turn-based para/multi-para and, speaking for myself, I’m not especially a fast typer AND English is not my native tongue (so I sometimes get stuck on a word or another and it gives 5 more minutes of waiting on my post xD)
■ We RP mature themes; and by that we don’t mean hosting orgies every weekend. As we roleplay characters of gray morality and part of the criminal world, harsh language and swearing (especially Fakhri), gambling (ehh Fakhri’s bread and butter lol), heavy use of alcohol (coughtFakhricough), smoking legal and not so legal substances (Guess who?), drugs (Starts with an F) and violence are all part of that package. We obviously respect people’s boundaries if a topic is sensitive for them. Also if you haven’t noticed, Fakhri is trash and Seda is the more respectable of the two.
■ No Discord RP. Multiple factors at play with this decision and, while there are very rare exceptions, just assume it’s not happening.
If you read through all of this, consider me amazed xD
This may all seem like a lot but me and my partner are actually quite laid back. We’re both adults with a career and obligations and we know what it is to get home tired, or not having the energy nor the time for the game on any given day, or week. This is why we highly value good communication and we respect each other’s time. Now, why only seek 2 or 3-ish people to RP with? We firmly believe in quality before quantity and, hopefully, having a tight-knit group is all we’ll need to weave stories and have fun. Think of it as a tabletop group of friends. As a final note, me and my partner both enjoy the PVE aspect of the game so if that’s something you enjoy as well, bonus kudos to you and let’s climb HoH already!
Also, liking rats is mandatory.
Fakhri Man’tik
■ alcohol, fogweed and gambling. Leaving the Primeval Forests behind, only to wake up one day in a dark alley, between a pile of trash and a rat. Even the cards couldn’t have foretold that he’d take that wrong turn, right into a world of crime, taking some of humanity’s vices as his own. But it seems the spirits (or a rat) took pity on him after all...
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CAARD | https://fakhrimantik.carrd.co/>
TUMBLR | https://gray-morality.tumblr.com/
Seda Ballard
■ bad decisions, ambition and wanderlust. Making a name for herself as a walking encyclopedia of Eorzean tariffs, imports, duties and taxes - and how to avoid paying them - her ink-stained fingers dancing through many account books. The path can be quite dark when one has no qualms where the money comes from. Good thing she met with someone who can hold a lantern to light the road ahead…
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CAARD | https://catscratching.carrd.co/
TUMBLR | https://catscratching.tumblr.com/
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Letter 10
Hey everyone,
I got a few messages back and it's good to hear everyone has been taking care of themselves. All health is important especially mental health. So, make sure you are taking care of your mental health as well as your physical health. Moving on to the topic at hand.
I’ve been thinking about moving to Mexico after doing all my research but I’m not quite sure if it’s a good idea there are a lot of pros and cons to consider. First visiting Mexico is great, as it’s a common vacation spot and somewhere I have been before. Long-term living is a different experience comparatively though. I’ve been reading articles and blogs about people taking the leap and living there. I’m particularly worried about the weather and being able to adapt to the lifestyle though.
The lifestyle change is something I would enjoy. The term mañana is often used to describe a relaxed approach to time, specifically in ‘tomorrow’ it can sometimes mean anything but tomorrow. For example, if your used to a faced paced strict schedule changing to a laid-back schedule may be relaxing at first but can be frustrating over time. In Mexico it’s customary to spend lots of time with family and neighbors. So moving there without family would be challenging. I can always spend time getting to know my neighbors but I’m kinda shy so I’m not to sure how I would handle it. Also, I’m rusty with my Spanish. I know a few phrases but comprehending a response from someone is difficult for me. So, it's something I would need to work on before the possible move.
Dealing with the paperwork and the bureaucracy is a long-term event. To prep for the move, I would need to have all my paperwork filled out and have multiple sets just in case. I must obtain a visa and we all know that’s a long process. Becoming a legal resident of Mexico is an even longer process. We already discussed in a previous letter what health care looks like, but banking is interesting. At least on the side of setting up accounts and paying bills. Things are cheaper in Mexico and more affordable instead of the ridiculousness of what’s happening right now in America. When paying your bills and setting up your banking account you have to do it in person and use cash. Mexico isn’t fully set up for online banking and transactions like America is. Which makes sense if I’m being honest. I would prefer that method, and I like having cash, so I know how much money I have. That change would be exciting for me.
Fitting in socially is also going to be a difficult task. They have a strong community connection so joining might be draining. Being part of the community is being present in almost if not every activity large or small. Skipping out of too many events may not go smoothly with the community. Being a part of so many events though is draining. I’ve been to a few quinceañera and those tire me out. The party is supposed to start at 4 pm but normally ends up starting at 6 pm and you party from any time from 2 to 6 am the next day. You also celebrate for several days as well. It is manageable to some degree, but I cannot last that long. Especially if there are events that are back-to-back.
Something that would help my transition IF it happens. Is to do more in-depth research about the culture. Like customs, food, social norms, ethics, speaking norms (they can be different depending on the area), driving culture, etiquette, and so many more topics. I don’t want to list them all. I could also slowly involve myself in the culture to help me feel more prepared. There are some things I didn’t mention because I didn’t want the letter to be too long but I’m going to make a pros and cons chart at the bottom of the page. I’m still thinking about it though. Please let me know your thoughts because sometimes I forget things and I like to know other's perspectives.
See you later,
Hailey
Pros:
Amazing food
Cheaper
More in-person experiences
Lifestyle change
Slow-paced living (being able to relax and not stress about jobs)
Practice my Spanish
Banking = cash
Possible job in healthcare
Cons:
Weather is too hot for me
Being social 24/7
Being away from my family
Being friends with neighbors
Speaking Spanish
Lots of paperwork prep / visa
Fitting in
Sources:
Wise. (2023). Americans living in Mexico: What you need to know. https://wise.com/us/blog/americans-living-in-mexico
Wise. (2023). Moving to Mexico: The ultimate guide. https://wise.com/us/blog/moving-to-mexico-guide
International Living. (2023). What’s it really like to live in Mexico? https://internationalliving.com/whats-it-really-like-to-live-in-mexico/
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Hi Sam!! It’s been so long omg😭😭😭 I will explain later tbh bc it’s a bit wild and long! But omg I’ve missed you😭(might be a two parter 😔)
I think your gifts probably give off the vibe of being so cute and presented so well that they are just too pretty to open!
And we love a hates everyone but her moment! And your grumpy characters are a good mixture of grumpy! Like they aren’t ever truly “mean” if that makes sense lol
I can definitely understand choosing the route of “pretending” stuff doesn’t matter in order to have some peace for your mental health! I think in general we’ve all experienced some form of that whether it be in our personal lives or the world. Sometimes it just needs to happen in order to not breakdown. So I get it, there’s nothing wrong with that! Been actually do familiar with that technique lately with how life is going HAHA
How has your reading been lately?? Anything exciting? Or disappointing?! A possible new book boyfriend or are we hating some characters rn?!
Going to the symphony does sound all grown up lol but it was so nice and it made me really just miss the whole vibes of experiencing that kind of performance! My brother and I are very much nerds when it comes to music lol but omg I’m the total opposite I feel less productive! I get tired around 4 pm now 😭 and omg the COLD😭 so brutal and I think im low in iron so I’m basically freezing all the time lol I haven’t started my winter break yet! I start it in about two weeks! But idk how long it is tbh lol
Oh bestie I love when you do rom-com stuff like sometimes the cheesier the better! You just do those vibes well and it’s nice to read like “feel good moment” stuff! And tbh if I had a chance in some alternate universe to kiss HIM I WOULD TAKE IT!!! I do think you’re creative! Maybe like the painting/drawing stuff isn’t your vibe but the way you write bestie?! SO GOOD! Like these plots,plots twists,love confessions, THE YEARNING?!? You do have a very creative mind! And these dividers are just adorable!
I hope you were able to end November on a semi okay note! I know you’ve mentioned how hard it’s been this past month and I hope you were able to relax a bit for the holidays!(hope that was at least okay!) also hope you got to eat some good potatoes in any way!!
I did notice you were a bit quiet this year about your birthday! But I assumed it was mainly because it was towards the beginning of the week and school probably got in the way! But I love that your students made it a bit better! And of course glad you have some lovely people in your life because you deserve that too!!-💜
I can't make them mean, I think it's my biggest fault in writing 😭 I want to make them grumpier and meaner but I just look at Harry with his dimply smile and his cinnamon roll hair and simply can't picture him being mean.
I'm sorry you're really going through it right now. I love to compartmentalize the bad and ignore it until I can deal with it later. Not sure if it's the healthiest way to handle things but I think it's gotta be done sometimes.
I have not been reading much 😭 I'm working on a Christina Lauren book. It's related to another one that I read last year and it's okay but I don't love it tbh right now. I'm only about 70 pages in. I'm surprised though because my friend who's like the biggest bookwork I know thought it was one of their best and I'm just not seeing it atm. Hopefully it will get better. I revisited my basketball bf though for good measure. It had been a few weeks since I reread about him. I feel like I need a cheesy-wintry book boyfriend. I watched Hot Frosty on Netflix, it's incredibly ridiculous. 100/10 recommendation though. no other notes 😂
I love the music relationship you have with your brother! That's so cute. You and the tuba right? I hope i didn't make that up but I can't even remember when we talked about your instrument last so I don't think I could find it if I tried.
Idk, I feel like with limited sunlight it's like I'm being timed and i have to get more done in a shorter amount of time 😂 I love the cold so much because I get to cover up my body the way I like ☠ let's not read into that. I just love sweaters and boots. I feel way more teacher-y in the winter than i do in the summer. But I get it. My bf is a chilly person. I call our apartment The Tropic of Cancer because he has it on a boiling temp (73). I open the window making full eye contact with him when the sun comes through in the afternoon. ANYWAY. I am sorry you're cold. I totally get that and I know this is a rough time of year for a lot of people.
I don't think it's a choice that you kiss him given the chance. It's a given.
I love spending time with my fam for Thanksgiving so that was nice. But it was a long busy working. I feel like I didn't get much relaxation time but I tried. It'll be a quick turn around until winter break so at least there's that. I'm hoping to finish my Christmas shopping soon and relax a little more.
One of my fave students got into trouble right around my bday and I know it's dumb but I was so bummed out about it I barely wanted to celebrate 😂 honestly the student probably wouldn't even have known it was my birthday but idk. it's hard to explain. Kid makes my whole day just to see him. The event day of was also tricky and exhausting. But regardless.
Onto part two thanks for being the best and sweet and lovely 💕
xoxo
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“Alright, kids. This your home. You know where it is okay? You can do whatever you want but not throwing a party okay? Okay. Here lemme hug you.” Mom hugged me first, then dad and Uriel. And when my mom hugged Xen, she hugged him longer.
“Xavier Xenophon, I’m so proud of you are today. You helped people who really need help. And you’re gonna take your day off, go to sleep all day, and do whatever you’re going to do today. Okay. I love you.” She kissed his cheeked. I was kinda envy but my parents loves for us was equal. Hmm maybe mom just missed him because Xen was several times absent from our regular sunday dinner.
“Looked, mom with her favorite son.” Uriel poked my arm.
You furrowed your eyebrows. “You are mom’s favorite son. You are dad’s favorite son. We all knew that, king.” “But have fun in New York, and bring me a keychain, okay?”
He nodded and hugged me again.
Then three of them drove away to the airport because their flight at 10 am and leaving us two.
“Alright. I’m just gonna lay down and sleep. Okay? See you at noon?” I nodded and watched him going upstairs to his room.
I decided to make breakfast since Xen already took his.
Hours later, at 12 pm, i was get ready to the mall since i need new makeup and clothes. I knocked his door and opened it.
“Hmm?” He rubbed his left eye.
“I’m going to the mall, are you in or are you in?” I asked him excitedly. Despite he still sleepy.
He shook his head. “Nah, I’m still tired.”
I frowned. “So you’re gonna let me drive alone?” Then i sighed.
“What if i take you out tonight to a fancy dinner? And you let me continue to sleep until this afternoon?” What a best offer!
“Yes! See you later Xen.” I walked to the car happily because your brother really knew you so well.
-
It’s 2 pm and i parked Xen’s car. I turned off the car and get out from the car. I strangely notice the front door was opened widely. The last time i remembered, i closed and locked the door. Was it Xen? But he must be sleeping right now. I held the multiple paper bag and slowly walked to the opened door. Something wasn’t right. I walked inside and saw a trace of blood near staircase. I dropped the paper bags and called 911.
“911, what’s the emergency?”
“Hello, i just got back from mall, and my front door was widely opened and i saw a trace of blood near staircase like drop of bloods I’m scared something bad might happed please sent someone here.”
“Alright, police is on their way. Stay where you are, don’t go inside.”
I didn’t listen to her and walked inside followed the blood. It lead me to the backyard and i stopped for a moment. I held your phone tight and continued to walked to the backyard. I was freezing because i saw someone float on the pool and the water turned red. Omg, this person had to be die. The person was wearing black t shirt, black short, short hair, i came closer to saw who’s the guy who died in my pool. I fall down to my knees when i saw Xen’s face. I cried out loud and called Valentino.
“Hi jet, what’s up? I was about to call you because-” He answered my called
I couldn’t stop tears. “Xen.”
“Zeta Yvonne, what happened? What happened to Xavier?” He sounded so worry
“Xen died.” Phone fell from my hand as i said Xen was dead.
I saw a hole in his forehead. He was shot? I went to the water to save him. Wait, he couldn’t be save because he was dead. I pulled him out of the water hardly and when j succeeded, i hugged him while crying.
But then my body was pulled by someone. The cops. I went inside with a cop, and the rest was handling him.
She gave me towel and i sat with her. I was stay silent while my tears kept falling down from my eyes.
“Excuse me, miss, can i know your name?”
“Z… ze… zeta.” I hardly could speak but i tried to cooperate as i could.
“Okay miss Xander, can you tell me what happened?” Another cop gave ma a cup of tea and i took it.
I sipped the tea then talked to the cop. “I was just… went home from mall, and i saw my… door opened widely and i saw blood and i called 911,” you were sobbing. “And i followed the blood and it went to the backyard and… i can’t.” You cried out loud.
“I’m so sorry for your loss, Zeta.” She left you alone at the sofa near the pool and you could saw Xen’s body was covered in sheets.
Long after, two men came to me as my emotion was getting better.
“Excuse me, miss Xander, I’m detective Bosch and this is Detective Edgar.” I was only nodded when he and his partner sat across me.
“I’m so sorry for your lost, but we have to asked you and you need to answer it specifically.” Said detective Bosch. I nodded slowly.
“This is your parents house right? Where are they right now?”
“They were on their way to New York to the real estate event with my brother.”
“Okay, so you were only with your brother in this house?” Asked detective Edgar.
You nodded. “Valentino was in San Francisco for doctor seminar since friday.”
“Valentino?” Asked det. Edgar again?
“Her second brother, she has 3 brothers, this is the third brother.” Det. Bosch explained. My tears fell down again when he mentioned Xen.
“Please tell us the chronologically.”
“After my parents and Uriel left, Xen… Xavier was sleeping while i just watching tv here, until 12 pm when i decided to go to the mall and he stayed at home. At 2pm i arrived at home and saw the door was opened and i walked inside and i saw blood and i called 911. After that i followed the blood to the backyard and i saw a body was floating on the pool.” You were crying again. “I came closer i saw it was Xen. I called Valentino and i noticed his forehad was bleeding and there was a hole and that’s when i went to the pool to help him… to pulled him out.”
“Can i check the cctv?”
“What ever you need, detective.” I walked to the monitor room below the staircase and the detectives and 2 cops followed me. They watched the footage alongside with me and it showed a man were kicked the door until it opened not long after i left house and went upstairs to the Xen’s bedroom and there was a gun shot, then Xen rushed downstairs while held his stomach and blood fell down to the floor. He walked outside and the man followed and he shot Xen when he walked on the edge of the pool and he fell to the water. That’s what happened.
I went back to the sofa with the detectives after watched the horrible footage. You were sobbing and they couldn’t do anything.
“Was your brother ever told you about his work?” Det. Bosch asked.
You shooked your head. “He worked on a murder case and he was so busy until last night.”
“Zeta! Xavier!” Someone outside were yelling my name and i knew it was Valentino’s voice.
I looked back and saw him ran inside to find me and i ran to him and cried in his shoulder.
“Where’s Xen?” He asked me while crying and i pointed to the backyard.
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"Oh, you wanted the real Punk, you wanted Pipebomb Punk? Well, you got it, you got your pipebomb, your muffingate" [chuckles in the crowd] "and it was more real than anything I ever said up on stage in the WWE. You got the real Punk, Max, and just like y'all" [Punk gestures at the crowd] "you just couldn't handle it." [some boos] "No, I know this is difficult for all of us, but stay with me here, I have something to show you people.” [Punk takes out his phone] “My conversation history with Maxwell Jacob Friedman.” [MJF makes a dash for the phone but is held back by FTR, Punk is visibly amused now]
“Monday, September 5th 2022, the night I punched Matt Jackson in the face." [crowd gasps] "Message from Maxwell Jacob Friedman, three in the morning: Are you okay?" [nervous giggles in the crowd] "Monday, September 5th, the same day, 5 pm: You stupid old man, why didn't you just keep quiet, you're ruining everything." [some cheers] "Monday, September 12th, 10 pm: You can call me if you want to talk." [faint laughter] "Tuesday, September 13th, 1 am, that's three hours later: Please respond." [loud laughter] "Tuesday, September 13th, 2 am, that’s an hour later: I hate you. Thursday, October 20th: I hate you so much. Sunday, November the 19th: I did it. I’m the champ. I wish I could have taken the belt off you." [mixed crowd reaction] "Saturday, December 25th, Christmas Day: Merry Christmas, Punk. I hope you have a lovely day and the arm is healing alright. See you soon? Christmas tree emoji, menorah emoji, red heart emoji." [devastating silence, cut to Max’s mortified face]
"Y'all wanna know how many messages I have sent to Max in those fifteen weeks between my little backstage altercation and Christmas Day? Zero. Because I don't care about you, Max, you are nothing to me, you're not even a blip on my radar. You can scratch at my door, you can talk shit about me on twitter, you can quote my promos all day, copy my mannerism, copy the way I talk and walk, all in a desperate attempt to get my attention, but I'm still just gonna leave you on read." [crowd erupts into laughter, MJF is fuming]
"Max, I once called you a less famous Miz, and I have to apologize for that. Truth is, you are nothing but a less famous CM Punk and now that the real CM Punk is back, the only thing that's giving you any relevance at all in this company, in this whole damn business, is the fact that you stole this belt from Jon Moxley, who shouldn't have been wearing it in the first place, because I am the rightful AEW World Champion. PG Punk is dead, but I am here and I'm old and I'm hurt and I'm tired of working with you." [crowd cheers]
"And, Max, for your own good, I suggest you spend more time wrestling in the ring, and less time trying to get the attention of older men, because when you get that attention, this Sunday, November 13th, Chicago, Illinois at the Full Gear pay-per-view, you won't be able to handle it."
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Burnout (Bucky x reader)
“Burnout”
Bucky x reader
Warnings: burnout, overworked, mental breakdown/panic attack
Word count: 3377
A/N: Take care of yourself, burnout is real and you CAN get sick. Trust me. I’m always here if you wanna talk to someone about anything or want another friend. Stay strong <3
Includes: Lyrics from the song “Weight of the World” by Citizen Soldier
Tags: @buckys2thicc @thatfangirl42 @thundering-barnes @abitgryffindorky @ladyfallonavenger
---------
These nights were becoming more common. And that wasn’t a good thing.
You sat at your desk surrounded by papers, empty cans of energy drinks, and a bright laptop screen. You held your head in your hands and you tried to keep your eyes awake, turning the screen brightness higher.
1:46 AM
You sighed and rubbed your eyes, trying to rub the sleep out of them. You took your hands away and looked back at the screen briefly before covering your face again.
You lived with the Avengers and were a huge asset to the team. Not only were you enhanced with powers, but you were incredibly intelligent. That being the case, you worked with Tony and Bruce in the lab either developing new ideas or fixing suits after missions. As well as being on the mission yourself. Therefore you trained early every morning with Steve and Bucky. You also did most of the mission reports, switching off with Steve once and a while.
Most nights you could be found either working through paperwork, down in the lab working into the morning with Tony, or researching for new projects in said lab. You never meant to stay up as late as you did, but no matter how hard you worked, more work kept appearing. Every 10 PM soon turned into 2 AM, and you could never quite catch a break. You had turned to caffeine not long ago, quickly using it as a crutch to supplement sleep.
You had just gotten back from a long mission with the team, and were incredibly sore. Steve hadn’t gone on this mission, leaving you to finish the report. Add to that, Tony wanted to make a better suit for Peter, and Sam’s wings were busted. Tony was working on Peter’s suit, wanting to make it perfect, leaving you with fixing the wings for Sam.
You decided to work on Sam’s Falcon suit first, seeing that you lived on Planet Earth and he could be scheduled for another mission at any time. What seemed to be superficial damage turned out to be extensive, and required much more repairing that you had anticipated. What you had planned to be a 2 hour process had turned into just over a day of work in the lab.
Not wanting to lose your place and needing a distraction from the soreness, you had worked for hours straight, only breaking to relieve yourself every so often. You were exhausted and ready to fall asleep when you laid back in your bed. Only to check your notifications and see an email from Fury requesting the mission report immediately.
Sent hours ago.
Which led you to where you were now. You hadn’t slept in almost 48 hours, sore from the mission, with a tedious mission report to fill out. Taking a deep breath, you removed your hands from your face.
2:07 AM.
You groaned, but brought your hands back to the keyboard and began typing. The words were blurring together and you shook your head a few times trying to stay awake. Somehow, you finished the report and sent it off and looked at the time again.
3:13 AM
You rubbed your temples before climbing back into your bed, sighing out as your eyes filled with tears. It wasn’t uncommon for you to go to bed this late/early. Lately Tony had been coming up with more ideas and would ask you to help. Since Tony works through most of the night, you had learned to do the same. You don’t remember the last time you had more than 3 or 4 hours of sleep.
You were off the hook for training for a few days, due to having just gotten back from a mission. And while you had been hesitant at first, you were grateful now that you had a bit more time to sleep. Despite the caffeine you had consumed to stay awake, you were absolutely exhausted. Tears threatened to fall from your eyes but you tried to breathe through it. You just wanted a break but couldn’t seem to catch one.
You curled into yourself as your stomach began to growl. ‘When was the last time I ate?’ you thought. Not that it mattered, there was nothing that could bring you out of your bed at that moment. You drifted off to sleep.
-----
You woke up to your phone chiming and groaned, picking it up to see what was so important. Your eyes find the top message, informing you that the mission report you had submitted was incomplete. You jolted out of bed and over to your desk to begin working on the report again, biting back tears of embarrassment at such a ridiculous error on your part. How could you have been so tired that you missed an entire section of a report?
You cracked open another energy drink that you kept in your room and began guzzling it. You were still in the same clothes as the day before and you hadn’t taken your hair down from it’s bun in days. Your stomach grumbled but you answered it with more of the energy drink. You would deal with hunger later. This was much more important.
Your head was pounding and you could barely sit up straight. You had barely gotten a few hours of sleep and somehow felt more tired than you had before it. Your sight became more blurry as it became harder to suppress the tears. You were angry at yourself, why couldn’t you just get this one fucking thing done?
You worked through the section quickly, or at least, you tried to. You kept having to reread sections, not comprehending what the words were saying anymore. You rubbed your eyes aggressively and shook your head, trying to concentrate. You reached to grab the energy drink again, but instead accidentally spilled it all over yourself. Letting out a “Fuck!” as you stood up, something inside you snapped.
You threw the can across the room, not caring how much was left inside of it. You flipped your chair and crumbled the miscellaneous papers on your desk. You let out a scream of frustration, and threw a picture frame across the room. After which, you bent over and placed your hands on your knees, small sobs beginning to wrack your body. You were just so tired, you had work to do, but you couldn’t do it no matter how simple it was.
You walked around the mess and into your bathroom, closing the door. You turned on the shower and got in, not even bothering to take off your clothes or wait for it to warm up. You didn’t care. You couldn’t. You sank to the floor, tears streaming down your face as the shower began to warm. You couldn’t bring yourself together, every time you tried to calm down a new wave of frustration and exhaustion would hit you and you would start crying all over again. You held your hand to your chest, trying to catch your breath a little, not having much success. You were gasping for air, it felt like you were breathing fire. Unable to fight it anymore, you started choking out lyrics to one of your go-to sad songs.
Feel the weight of the world over me tonight.
If I break, if I break down this time
You took a shaky breath and choked out the next line
Hope you know I tried…
Meanwhile, Bucky had been thinking about you. The two of you were very close, you had been ever since Steve had introduced you to him. He was in awe of how you could both rival Tony in the lab and himself in the training room. That and how much you did for others. You had helped him a lot when Bucky had first come to the compound. And he was very grateful.
He knew you had gotten back from a mission a few days ago, and were probably exhausted. From what he had heard it had been a brutal mission. However, in the past, you had usually gotten back into the routine of daily life pretty quickly. He hasn’t so much as seen you since you got back.
He couldn’t help but worry.
He decided to go to your room to check on you, seeing as it was later in the morning and you had had a chance to sleep. Little did he know, you hadn’t. When he got to your door he knocked and waited for a response. He was met with nothing. However, with his enhanced hearing, he heard muffled singing from inside. He couldn’t hear the words, but you sounded in pain.
My mind’s such a mess, I can’t handle it, I’m at the end of my rope.
Worried, he let himself in and took in the state of the room. It was completely trashed, shattered glass, overturned furniture, crumbled papers. He heard the shower running and could hear your cries through the lyrics
My neck is breaking body shaking
Sometimes it’s so hard to breathe
But no one sees it follows me i always end up underneath
The weight of the world…
You began coughing, still gasping for air and holding your chest. Bucky came over to the bathroom door and opened it, concerned you were in pain. You were sitting on the floor, drenched and shaking. Steam filled the room, fogging up the mirrors. He came over to you, trying to get your attention but you couldn’t hear him. Worried, he stepped into the shower as well, swearing as it burned his skin. He crouched down in front of you and took your face in his hands, trying to guide your face to his.
“Y/n, y/n can you hear me? Can you look at me?” he said.
Coming back to your senses slightly, you tried to figure out who was in front of you. You grabbed one of his forearms and focused your eyes, still struggling to breathe. You found Bucky’s blue eyes looking back at you.
Bucky, knowing you were now aware of his presence, reached to turn off the water while still maintaining eye contact. You were coughing, choking on each breath, still shaking and crying. Bucky had never seen you like this. You tried looking around again, forgetting briefly where you were and what had happened, breath picking up again in confusion. “Hey, hey, y/n? I need you to keep your eyes on me okay?”
“It...hurts..” you gasped out, feeling like fire filled your lungs. Your arms had gone numb and in the absence of the warm water your wet body was now shivering from both the cold and anxiety.
Bucky quickly looked you up and down. “What hurts, y/n?” he said calmly but firmly even though he was freaking out internally.
Fresh tears spilled out of your eyes. You tried to talk but couldn’t speak through your panic. You rubbed your chest, willing your heart to slow down but it wouldn’t.
Bucky, still keeping his eyes locked on yours, said “Listen, y/n, I need you to try and breathe with me slowly, okay? Like this,” he breathed in deeply and let it out slowly. You tried to copy him and after a few breaths lost your pace. You shook your head. “I can’t…. I...I…”
. “It’s okay, you’re okay, you’re safe y/n. Try again, I’m right here okay? Look at me.” he said, still breathing deeply. Eventually, you were able to find a rhythm and catch your breath, becoming aware of the situation and everything that had happened. Now able to breathe, you felt new tears of shame rush to your eyes. There were a few moments of silence
“What happened?” Bucky asked, concern etched on his face.
You let out a small sob and covered your face, and Bucky’s heart shattered. He had never seen anyone this upset, nevermind you. You had always been so strong, energetic, joyful. And here you were, soaking wet and shaking on the shower floor. What the hell had happened to you?
He stood up and got out of the shower, also soaked, but he didn’t care about that right now. He leaned down and put one arm behind your back and the other looped under your knees and he picked you up. He placed you down on the vanity and stood in front of you. He carefully took your wrists and pulled them away from your face, you looking at him through bloodshot eyes.
“You - you’re soaked,” you said, both out of shock and in an attempt to deflect the attention from you.
“Wh- I mean, yeah, so are you,” Bucky said. “Y/n, can you tell me what happened?”
You looked down at your hands and swallowed thickly, embarrassed. “I, uh…” you cleared your throat. What had happened? You closed your eyes and rubbed your head.
The shower
The song
Your room
The report
The energy drink
Oh fuck
You sighed out “Shit, I just…” again, shame began to overtake you. “It’s stupid, forget about it,” you said, trying to stand up.
Bucky stopped you, confused. “Y/n, whatever just happened, that… That’s not caused by something stupid. I’ve never seen you so upset before. Hell I’ve never seen anyone so upset before. But I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.”
“Really, Buck, I’m fine,” you said.
“Then why are you trying not to cry?”
You sighed. There was no other way out of this. You looked at him and said, “I was just done.” You looked back down at your hands, and continued trying to keep the waiver out of your voice. “I just, um...After the mission I had to fix Sam’s wings, and it took me longer than I expected. And then I still had the mission report which took me all of last night and then I found out that I had missed an entire section. And I got mad that I couldn’t focus or stay awake and I just kind of...broke.”
As you looked back at him, face not as red, he could see how tired you seemed. “Are you sleeping?”
“I mean, a little bit it’s not like I’ve been awake this whole time but -”
“Y/n.”
You looked at him. “A couple of hours a night at most,” you said quietly.
Bucky nodded sadly. “Anything else?”
You opened and closed your mouth a few times. “I mean it’s not a big deal -”
“What I just saw was a big deal,” Bucky said gently.
“I haven’t really made time to eat either,” you tried to laugh it off a little. “Just kind of chugged energy drinks. But then I spilled it all over myself, so...bad idea I guess.”
Bucky wasn’t laughing. But he wasn’t angry either. He was, but not at you, never at you.
“I’m sorry,” you said.
“Why didn’t you say anything? The days off after missions are there for rest.”
You shrugged. “I had important shit to do.”
“Well you’re pretty important shit too,” he said a little more firmly, but still not angrily. He sighed. “But really, if you’re not okay then nothing gets done. You’re going to get sick if you keep doing this to yourself. When was the last time you had more than a few hours of sleep?”
“I don’t know,” you answered honestly.
He sighed once again. “I’m sorry,” you said, fearful that he was angry with you.
“No, it’s not your fault I just…” he looked away for a second before looking back at you. “I don’t like seeing you like this. I don’t want you pushing yourself so hard and getting hurt.”
You sighed sadly and rubbed your eyes. “Every day I tell myself it’s the last day I’ll stay up so late. I always tell myself I’ll eat after my project is done. But no matter how hard I work there’s just more and more work that needs to get done. And I can’t keep up. I feel like I’m drowning. But no matter how much I hate it I...I always come last,” you said.
“You shouldn’t have to,” Bucky said.
After a few moments of silence, Bucky pulled you in for a hug, you still sitting on the counter. You closed your eyes against his chest and sighed out, feeling good finally getting all of that off of your chest.
“You’re taking the next few days off.” he said.
You pulled back and looked at him. “But the report -”
“Is mostly done and Steve can get the rest of the information from Sam.” Bucky finished for you.
“But -”
“Nope. There is not a single thing you could say right now that is going to prevent me from making sure you take care of yourself for a few days.” he said, and you knew he was right. Nodding, he pulled you back in for a hug.
“We should get out of these clothes.” you said softly, shivering a little.
Bucky laughed a little. “Yeah, we really should.”
You moved to stand up from the counter, still a little weak as you leaned on Bucky a little. You walked slowly out to your room and were met with the mess you created earlier. “Shit,” you said, taking in the broken glass and furniture.
Bucky turned you around and said “Do you want to come to my room? We can deal with this some other time.”
You simply nodded, stepping around the broken shards of glass and to the hallway. Bucky’s room wasn’t far from yours, and luckily no one was in the hallways to comment on how both of you were in wet clothes. Once in his room, he closed the door after you and went to his dresser. He pulled out a pair of sweats and one of his T-shirts and handed them to you. “They might be a little big but -”
“Thank you,” you said, taking the clothes and heading to his bathroom. You closed the door and peeled your current outfit off of you. You found a spare towel and dried off the rest of you, and pulled on Bucky’s clothes. They were huge on you, but you didn’t mind. You took your hair down and redid your bun before splashing some cold water on your face. Deeming you looked more presentable, you came back out and saw that Bucky had also changed. Smiling warmly, he pointed to the bed.
“So you are going to lie down, and I am going to go make you some food. I’ll be right back.”
You started shaking your head. “No, it’s okay, you don’t have -”
He raised his eyebrows, still pointing to the bed. Swallowing a laugh, you nodded and sat down on the bed. Bucky then left the room and returned a few minutes later with a sandwich. After you had eaten it, you laid back in the bed, melting into the softness of the mattress. You faced away from Bucky, who was sitting next to you on his phone. He was (slowly) texting Steve to finish your report, which took very little convincing.
After a few minutes, you asked “Can you lay down with me?”
Bucky smiled a little to himself. “Sure, doll,” he said, and he moved to lie down next to you. Unsure of what exactly you wanted, he gave you space. Not soon after, you turned over and scooted closer to his side. After a moment of shock from Bucky, you asked “Is this okay?” Readjusting a little, he wrapped his arm around you and pulled you closer. “Yeah, is this okay?” he asked in return. You merely hummed in approval, already feeling safer in his warm embrace. He let out a small laugh. “Try to get some rest, y/n. I’ll be here whenever you wake up.”
It was the most peaceful sleep you had ever had.
#burnout#burn out#Bucky Barnes#buckybarnes#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky imagine#bucky#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barns fanfiction#bucky barns imagine#bucky barns x y/n#bucky barns x you#bucky barnes imagine#MCU#mcu imagine#mcu fanfiction#marvel#marvel fanfiction#marvel fanfic#comfort#bucky barnes comfort#stressed#song lyrics#lyrics inspired
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We all see how the way Shield Hero handles slavery is bad right? Like I don’t feel radical for saying that in your average Isekai tv show if a character isn’t getting stronger the main groups response shouldn’t be “become a slave to the mc” and then the mc is “well I don’t agree with it but if it’s your choice I won’t go against it” WHICH IS BASICALLY ACCEPTING SLAVERY AT THAT POINT! SPEAKING OF WHICH I MAKE F*CKING SLAVERY A HUGE THING I. YOUR STORY? Is it supposed to be “gritty” and “edgy” ???? Honestly and don’t get me started on Naofumi! 17 year old edgy me used to love this character and all the hardships he went through, but honestly going through hardships doesn’t justify being a 24/7 hardass. He got betrayed ONCE. ONCE at the beginning and decided to be awful to everyone afterwards unless the went through a whole ass arc with him. Like I’m fine with characters getting dramatic personality changes due to circumstances, but Naofumi felt like he was WAITING his whole life to go asshat.
Now I’m fine with people arguing with me on the bit about Naofumi , but I swear if ONE of y’all try defending the slavery I’m blocking and reporting it’s 10:23 pm and I’m too tired to care
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Guysgfh is this how you request- umm read toxic traits of genshin characters, may I request venti after the leaving u sometimes returning to a empty place? :p

Synopsis: venti (with his toxic trait) leaving you sometimes only to come back to an empty home.
Warnings: toxic trait venti
Game/ fandom: genshin impact
Pronouns for reader: gender neutral/ not mentioned
A/n: Hi! Thank you so much for requesting (also yup you did it right!) I think I got a bit carried away with this and didn’t make it as... angsty as you probably would’ve like it, so i apologize if you don’t really like it! But I think I’m gonna post a fic for albedo later today for anyone who’s interested. But for right now I hope you enjoy and have a lovely day/afternoon/night!

Venti has a habit of leaving unannounced quite often. Not for any actual reason other than he just wanted to get away. There was no fight between you too. Nothing. He leaves because he begins to feel like he’s become more and more dependent on you/ tied down to you. He doesn’t want that, he wants to be free from any commitment. But he still loves you dearly, so he can’t bring himself to just dump you and leave.
He’s been gone for some time now this time though. He typically takes a couple of hours alone and then comes back. But this time it’s been almost the whole day, and you’re starting to get both angry, and worried.
So you get up and go ask for extra commissions from the adventures guild to get your mind off of things. He got to take breaks from you all the time, so you can be the one to leave just this once.
Little do you know venti’s on his way back to mondstadt. Once he arrives though, he doesn’t see you in any shops or at the guild. Understandable, it’s about 10 pm. He didn’t expect to see you out and about. So when he got home, he was shocked to see that you were nowhere to be found in your shared home.
Venti’s mind was going 1,000 miles a minute, though on the outside he appeared to be calm. That calm appearance was short lasted though, for when he went into your bedroom and didn’t see you there he started to panic even more.
Did you finally get tired of him and leave? His first thought was to turn the place upside down, and look for you. But the slightly rational part of him in the back of his mind said “hey man let’s not do that and go to katheryn at the adventurers guild, she’s always around so she might’ve seen y/n”
So that’s where he went. The adventurers guild. Thankfully Katheryn had spoke with you about some extra commissions. Once venti knew where you were he speed over to the area, and began looking for you frantically.
He found you fighting a ruin guard effortlessly. You were very clearly taking out your aggression on it too. You finished short after he had seen you, and he sped over and hugged you.
“Venti what the hell?! What are you doing?! Where did you even come from?” You frantically said. Venti just put his forehead on your shoulder and wept. “I didn’t know where you went.. and I thought you left me, or something awful happened to you... and I didn’t know what to do...” he said through his sobs.
Your heart almost broke. He clearly felt bad about what he did, and was worried about you. You felt a tinge of guilt, but then you remembered you did the same thing as him. “Well I only did the same thing you do to me three times a week.” You said shortly.
“I know! And I’m sorry!” he said removing his face from your shoulder his eyes were puffy, and his face slightly red. If he was sorry, and knew what he was doing then why did he continue to do it every other night? You felt guilty, yet angry at the same time. You wanted to run away and cry, but scream at the same time.
“I know you probably hate me, or at least are mad at me. But I am genuinely sorry, and I never wanted to hurt you. I just didn’t know how to... handle... oh god-“ he began, but then for the first time in his long life he is at a loss for words. You sighed, and removed yourself from him.
“Venti I’m not sure what you’re feeling, or what went through your head to make you think that leaving your partner randomly was ok. I’m glad you now understand that, that’s not ok. But I’m still mad at you. So if you’ll excuse me” you said before you walked away, leaving Venti there shocked, and guilty.

#genshin headcanons#genshin impact#genshin x reader#genshin x gender neutral reader#genshin fluff#genshin headers#genshin venti#venti x mc#venti x traveler#venti x lumine#venti the bard#venti x aether#venti angst#venti headers#venti headcanons#venti x reader#venti x y/n#venti x you#gi venti
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owning a bakery and being discovered by the ada and the port mafia (part 4)
platonic! mori ougai x f!reader
type of writing: head canons !!
this is part of my head canon series, flour & fluff !!
tag list is open !! go to this google form and fill it out to sign up!
series synopsis: owning a bakery at 20 is tough; even more so when you have to handle members of two opposing organizations! this is your journey to meeting those fools and creating an unlikely bond with each of them. but only at the cost of your peace and sanity.
fandom: bungou stray dogs
content: fluff & platonic stuff
previous: the doctor is in the house (quite literally)
author’s note: it’s port mafia time! ages are still one year younger than canon
also!! my 100 followers event still has 7 5 4 3 2 1 spot open for requests!! go check out this post for more info!! i’d like to get the whole prompt list done early so i have time to write them! (event is now closed as of feb. 10, 2021)
another doctor? oh wait, another doctor and his daughter
as you expected, ranpo and fukuzawa have not let you go easy after what had happened a couple days prior (3 days ago to be exact)
one of them, or more often than not, the two of them would go visit the bakery at least twice a day
once in the morning right before opening, and the second time right before closing
if they could, they would visit around lunch time, but that was usually yosano
tbh you were thankful that yosano hasn’t been as overbearing as the other two but you knew she probably wanted to give you a break because holy shit are they extremely over protective
currently, it was the fourth day of being watched by the two eldest ada members, but there were no said ada members with you at the moment
and boy were you overjoyed
turns out, the ada has an important escort job for a government official or smth, and on top of that, fukuzawa has a bunch of meetings to attend
even ranpo has his hands full with a couple of difficult murder cases across the country
you’re lowkey, no highkey, worried bc you learned literally 3 days ago that ranpo doesn’t know how to ride the train 😀😀
you were worried abt them, there’s no question, but on the inside you were a bit relieved to which ranpo called you out on it immediately
that led to the two of you going at each other’s throats for nearly half an hour
let’s just say fukuzawa scolded the two fo you for a while
going back to the present, it was around one pm and you had just finished sending a text message to both fukuzawa and ranpo (cause they insisted) when a little blonde girl with blue eyes wearing a red dress matching with a red bow in her hair and red shoes walked in
she immediately went to the glass case to look at the desserts displayed
as she looked around, you watched her at the corner of your eyes and a with a smile as you wiped down one of the tables
after wiping down the table, you quickly went to go wash your hands and you walked over and stood next to her
you bent slightly and smiled bigger as she stared at one of the treats in the glass
“is that the one you want?”
she nodded without looking away from the glass
you giggled before going to the back and placing the one she wanted on the plate and held it out to her
the blonde was honestly so confused bc one, no adult supervision, and two, there was no tell tale way to know that she had money
to you, she was an open book so when she looked at you, her face immediately read “but i have no money, or a parent...??”
you simply patted her head and pushed along to one of the nearby tables and pulled a chair for her
you did not regret anything when you saw the look on her face when you told her that it was on the house
“name’s elise!” “i’m (y/n)!”
:D
you sat with her for a while continuing to give her sweets she reminded you of ranpo in all honestly and talking abt random things
she mostly complained abt a “rintarou” though
speaking of which, when a man in a doctor’s coat came through the door near screaming “elise-chan! elise-chan!” you figured that was probably the rintarou she was complaining abt
you smiled as you watched the two interact
“elise-chan why would just disappear like that?!”
“i wanted to see rintarou cry”
“so mean!”
...their behavior was questionable but endearing ig
“rintarou” suddenly turned to you, thanking you for “taking care of his daughter bc she’s always getting into trouble”
*cue angry noises and face from elise*
he introduced himself as a “local neighborhood doctor”
you smelled bullshit but didn’t say anything bc he has been kind to you so far
he asked you how he could repay you and you were thinking that you can actually win something bc you’re not refusing an ada member oh you poor oblivious child but you were appalled when elise answered for you
it went like this
“is there anything i can repay you with for taking care of my dear elise-chan? perhaps paying for all the sweets she has eaten?”
“oh no! don’t worry abt that, it’s nothing! it was a pleasure getting to know—”
“let’s buy out all of her food!”
h u h
you knew she enjoyed your pastries and stuff but like w h a t
you inwardly sigh in relief when the doctor agreed with you that “that’s a bit much elise-chan” and you were thanking every deity out there when suddenly
she threw a temper tantrum
you watched in confusion and slight horror at the 180 of the sweet little girl you were talking to like 10 minutes ago
her guardian panicked slightly and tried to get her to calm down but ahaha no that didn’t happen
“WAHH rintarou!! but i want it!! (y/n)’s food is the best i’ve ever had!!”
“b-but elise-chan, we can’t just buy—”
“i’ll wear all the dresses i’ve ever rejected and more if we buy it out right now and keep buying sweets here forever”
“...deal”
your eyes twitch at the “innocent” smiles the two gave you after their “talk”
fast forward literally 5 minutes and you’ve already flipped the close sign on your door with note (saying you’re sold out) and you’re all over the place running around behind the counter trying to fit everything into boxes as the two are sitting on a nearby table lightly chatting
about 20-25, nearly 30 minutes later you finishing packing everything in the glass case
it was a lot
we’re literally talking about tiered cakes and dozens of batches of cookies, cupcakes, literally everything and anything
when the two notice you’re done they get up meet you by the register
“a-ano, you really don’t have to buy all of this...the total is going to be quite large...”
“no worries!”
honestly at this point, you kind of missed the chaotic calls from ranpo that happened like every half hour
you thought you were done being surprised for the day but next thing you know men in suits come into Sakura’s and begin to load the boxes into a black car
dealing with the detectives was already starting to be a handful and now you have to deal whoever the hell these two people where
quite frankly, you were having trouble wrapping your head around all of this
like-
who buys out a whole bakery?!
and who has the money to buy out a whole bakery?!
what kind of job could you possibly have?!
was this guy really just a doctor?!
right before the two leave you call out to them
“a-ah wait! i don’t think i ever caught your name!”
the two blink at you before eyeing each other
“mori ougai” 😄😄
you started smelling bad shits again
>:/
it was a weird feeling
you felt something off but at the same time, you weren’t really afraid
and with that the two left
you were already tired from this whole thing but you now get the rest of the day off
so i guess something worked out in your favor
until the next fricking day
again, ranpo and fukuzawa canceled out on you
you weren’t sure if you were relieved or not
and as soon as you thought you were going to have a normal business day, guess who walked through the doors
yeah that’s right
“the local neighborhood doctor” and his daughter
you froze before eyeing them with suspicion
if mori was amused, he didn’t show it, only giving you a smile
elise immediately left his side and practically leaped onto you making you cut yourself with the knife you were holding
well shit now you’re bleeding
it was only 7:15 in the morning; you had literally just opened
you were cursing every deity out there
you quickly grab a nearby and press it against your wound and scrambled around looking for the first aid kit you had nearby
“oh? (y/n)-kun are you bleeding?”
“(y/n) i’m sorry!”
“a-ah, no worries elise-chan”
you really need to stop spacing out bc next thing you know, the sign on your door is flipped to close again (along with the same note from yesterday explaining you’re sold out taped on the door) and you’re sitting at a table with elise in your lap and mori wrapping your hand in a bandage
“tsk tsk (y/n)-kun you need to be more careful...but it is elise-chan’s fault”
“die rintarou!”
“but no worries! it’s not that deep so you don’t need stitches”
“thank you, mori-san, but can i ask why you and elise-chan are here again? not that i mind...”
whether or not you were lying is up to you
“oh we’re here to buy out your stock again!”
“wait what-”
the fuck???
did they not just buy everything yesterday???
frozen, you stare at the man in front if you with said man giving you another “innocent” smile
this little shit
wait till you meet dazai
but i guess that’s why the sign on the door is flipped to close bc you don’t even remember flipping it yourself or taping the note from yesterday to the door
you spent the next half hour trying to convince the two over some tea (your signature one of course) that “no you don’t need to or should buy everything i have, you’re going to deprive the rest of my customers”
cough cough ranpo
like the day before, you were losing this argument
can you just never win?
as you were losing the argument (obviously) you realized that you don’t even know why they want to buy everything again
“mori-san, why do the two of you even want to buy everything in the first place?”
“ah it was elise-chan’s request of course! but i do admit, after trying some of your sweets myself, i grew quite attached! so did the rest of my subordinates after my precious elise-chan made them try it, not like they could refuse her or me; i am their boss after all (y/n)-kun.”
*cue confusion*
“subordinates? wait are those the guys from yesterday?? aren’t you a doctor...?”
“ah ex-doctor actually, i’m the leader of the port mafia”
...
“ah (y/n)-kun that’s quite the coughing fit you have going on, do you need water?”
if it wasn’t obvious, you choked on your tea and had quite the coughing fit; you were wheezing and everything making elise leave you lap and settling for dangling over mori’s shoulders
“...you’re kidding”
“im afraid im not”
this man confuses the hell out of you??
like-
w h y would he just say that, to you of all people
but it explains the bad shits you were smelling/feeling yesterday
“are you afraid?”
“being completely honest with you, mori-san, not really”
“and why is that?”
you simply shrug not really knowing the answer
you aren’t lying, you just aren’t
maybe bc yesterday, he seemed more like a doting parent than the boss of the most criminal organization of yokohama
yes, you’ve heard the rumors, obviously, but just saying, if the port mafia wanted to hurt you, you’d probably be dead in a ditch by now
and they haven’t really been a bother to you, they were more like background characters in your life
well
until yesterday of course
mori simply raises an eyebrow and a smile seemingly okay with your very vague answer
“why did you tell me that mori-san?”
the man only smiles a bit wider at you and this time, you’re the one raising an eyebrow
“just a feeling”
yeah you were starting to smell bad shits again
“and besides! elise-chan seems quite fond of you (y/n)-kun! i wasn’t planning on doing anything to you in the first place, but even if i wanted to, i don’t think i could! i wouldn’t want to upset my dearest cute elise-chan”
“die rintarou!”
“that’s mean elise-chan!”
your eyes began to twitch in slight annoyance
cause istg the duality of this man—
this strange strange man
oh dearest you haven’t even met dazai yet
after that has been said and done, somehow you found yourself in front of stores being dragged by elise
how did you end up there you ask? i don’t know either so there’s nothing we can do abt that
eventually, you found yourself holding a bunch of shopping bags full of dresses and clothes of the sort
some of it your size and the others elise’s
...
“mori-san?”
“yes (y/n)-kun?”
“why do i have bags of clothing that are fit for me rather than elise?”
“oh that’s because elise refused to go without you and if you didn’t get anything!”
yeah
that makes perfect sense, of course
you could see why elise kept on complaining abt this guy
the two of you actually bonded over making fun of him
you have n o fear
actually, maybe just a little
the three of you were out for basically the entire day and you were exhausted
cause holy shit there was a lot of money wasted, shopping bags obtained, and walking involved
it was around 5 pm when the three of you were making it back to Sakura’s
along the way you found yourself having a pleasant conversation with mori
even if he was a questionable person to be having a pleasant conversation with, you enjoyed it nonetheless
you hoped that it makes it harder to get rid of you if he ever changed his mind but we don’t talk abt that
anywho
when the three of you arrived, you immediately dumped all the bags you were holding and went straight to work packaging everything for “the local neighborhood doctor”
before they left, mori agreed to not buy out all of your stock except for some occasions but instead settled ordering massive batches of a little bit of everything every few days
how that’s not the same as buying everything you won’t ever know
you were standing outside Sakura’s watching the two get into the car that had arrived when suddenly, mori turned to you
“ah (y/n)-kun, i know that you wouldn’t tell anyone about this, it wouldn’t be like you to, but just a reminder, it would probably be in your best interest not to let anything slip to anyone okay? we wouldn’t want any enemies using you against the port mafia. so take care of yourself hm? see you next time”
and bippity boppity boo just like that, they were gone
how that man managed to get your personality down in just like 10 hours you don’t want to know
and that’s basically the story of how you started making more food/bake goods to sell
true to his word, every few days, or sometimes consecutive days, mori called you and made a large order
and i mean large
on those days, someone from the port mafia would pick it up and then you get paid
thankfully, by increasing the amount of food you made, you always had enough to put out on display and to sell even after the large order
before doing that, on those days you didn’t have a large stock, someone by the name of edogawa ranpo would weep at your feet
he will deny this; after all, great detectives don’t do weeping
or so he says
and speaking of the detective, you never did tell him what had transpired the two days he and fukuzawa were absent on checking on you
but tbh, i even think ranpo could’ve deduct this one
you didn’t tell him bc you were afraid, no of course not that’s ridiculous mori, in elise’s words, was a loser
you didn’t tell him bc you knew he and fukuzawa would flip the fuck out
and that would be a major inconvenience to you
you didn’t see the point in telling them anyway
so whatever, it’s like it’ll be important
and if ranpo and fukuzawa noticed the abundant of bags near the door leading up to the staircase when they visited you at the end of the day they didn’t say anything
jk
of course one of them said smth
“ne (n/n)-chan since when did you like to buy a bunch of things; waste of money if you could just be using that money to make more food so you wouldn’t sell out right away and have food to feed me”
your eyes twitched
he could’ve worded that a little better but whatever
it is ranpo-san after all
“i just got carried away since i closed up early; you know it isn’t often i get to go shopping”
and if he smelled your bullshit he didn’t say anything
for real this time
that slightly concerns you ngl
anyways
let’s just say quite a few heads were turned when they saw their boss leading a bunch of lower level subordinates carrying many light pink boxes of different sizes to his office for the second time
oh and just another thing
*whispers* he was lying when elise made his other subordinates eat your food; they kept it all to themselves”
was that a ruse to help lead the revelation of his real occupation who knows
“(y/n)-kun is a very interesting person don’t you think so elise-chan?”
“quiet. i’m eating cake.”
“that’s so mean elise-chan!”

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isaac is a soft warm husband pt. 2
isaac unwittingly becomes a househusband to his high-functioning workaholic wife. and he’s a little salty about it.
romance/humor
warnings: graphic sexual language
“You know, when this is over, we should really have angry sex.”
“Isaac,” I sighed. “You’re not listening to me.”
Isac reclined further back against the pillows on our bed and crossed his arms over his chest. “I am listening, honey. You’re upset. You’re upset because you think I’m trying to control you. Just because I said I wanted you to stop working so much, you think I’m trying to turn you into an obedient little housewife.”
“Stop saying ‘you think.’ It’s dismissive. I know these things to be facts.”
“Do you, love?” The corner of his mouth turned up in a subtle smirk. “I love it when you act like a little know-it-all. It’s such a turn on.”
“I-saac, stop flirting with me like we’re teenagers. I’m being serious. You knew when you married me that I wasn’t going to be a typical housewife for you. Now all of a sudden, you want me to stay home and stop working?”
Isaac shook his head. “That’s not what I meant, and I feel like you know that. Will you just come back to bed?”
It was a tempting offer. The covers were up to Isaac’s waist, and he wasn’t wearing a shirt, and normally I’d have zero reservations about climbing into bed with my husband, but he was trying to distract me and it was not going to work. Not this time.
“No,” I muttered, regretfully tearing my gaze from his sun-kissed chest and the light smattering of hair that covered the hard plane under his stomach, the treasure trail that led to happier places than this conversation. “I’m not getting back in bed until you apologize.”
I was standing at the foot of the mattress, my hands on my hips. I probably looked like a stern vice principal or something. I felt a little ridiculous but I had to hold my ground. This wasn’t about me. This was about feminism. This was about my right to live my life how I wanted. I was standing up for women everywhere. That’s what I told myself.
“What exactly do you want me to apologize for?” Isaac asked, too calmly for my liking. “Fine, I’m sorry for noticing that you're basically a workaholic. That you’re always tired and frustrated after you come home from work. Baby, all I did was suggest you should cut back on work, delegate some of your responsibilities to other people.”
I shook my head. “No, I can’t. I don’t want my boss to think I can’t handle all of it. He already makes sexist jokes about how I’m the first woman he’s ever promoted to my position. Besides, you said you wanted me to stay home, not work less.”
“That’s the same thing.”
“No, it’s not.”
“Okay, fine, it’s not. Is it so bad that I want to spend more time with my wife?”
“We spend time together...” I mumbled, sounding unconvincing even to myself.
Isaac laughed. “Oh yeah, I get to talk to you five minutes before bed because you pass out right when you get home from the office, which lately has been about 10 pm. Oh, and if I’m lucky I get to talk to you on the weekend in between your 15 minute breaks because you bring the office home with you.”
I groaned and paced to the other side of the room. “Well, what do you want me to do?! I’m sorry I care about my job!”
“I get that! I care about my job too, but at least I’m here. And you’re not. I feel like all I ever do is cook and clean and wait for you to get back, holding out some small hope that you might stay awake for just a minute longer so I can share maybe two words with you--that’s if you’re not too tired from crying into my shoulder because you had a bad day at work.”
“W-well,” I stammered, aimlessly grappling for another line of argument, “so, that’s what this is about? You’re tired of comforting me when I have bad days?”
“No, of course not--”
“So then, you’d rather I cook and clean, have the house spotless and dinner ready on the table when you get home from work?” Isaac didn’t say anything. A knowing grin spread across his face, accompanied by a playful twinkle in his eyes. He didn’t even have to say anything; at this point, his facial expressions were pissing me off. “Well? What the hell are you smiling about?”
“I’m not doing this with you anymore,” he said calmly. “I’m not engaging in this because we both know you instigate fights when you’re defensive. And you’re defensive because you know I’m right. You’re trying to spin this into a feminist issue, willfully ignoring my valid points. At this point, you’re just Fox News-ing soundbites to make me sound sexist.”
I snorted. “Fox News-ing soundbites? Really?”
“I thought I was talking to my wife, not Bill O’Reilly.”
“Wowww. You really just called me Bill O’Reilly to my face. Have fun sleeping on the couch tonight.”
Isaac chuckled.
I stared back, trying to appear unmoved, because it was at this moment that it occurred to me that I was kind of turned on. I was still angry, but now I was horny too. It was a biological response and completely out of my control. It was Isaac’s fault, the way he managed to keep a clear head and stay calm while calling out my bullshit. Not many people could do that.
It was why I married him. He could put me in my place. I needed that sometimes. Still, I didn’t like admitting I was wrong.
“You’re only hearing what you want to hear,” he continued. “You’re not listening to what I’m saying, so I’m not arguing with you anymore.”
“Fine, whatever. You’re the one who brought it up.” I threw my hands up in frustration and headed towards the bedroom door, stopping when he called out my name.
“Woah, slow down. Where the hell do you think you’re going?” he said.
I turned the knob and opened the door. “Um, I’m leaving? Since you don’t want to talk to me anymore?”
“This is true. I’m done talking, but you’re not going anywhere.” He tilted his head and looked me up and down. Five years married, I still hadn’t built up an immunity to The Look.
“Why’s that?” I challenged. My defenses were crumbling with each passing second, my skin burning each time his eyes raked over my body.
“Because darling, you’re really hot when you’re mad, and having it out with you always turns me on. And I know you’re turned on too, so why don’t we stop talking in circles, and fuck. Now.” A few moments passed and we stared each other down, both waiting for the other to make the next move. “Come on baby, I can almost taste you from over here. And you look so good standing over there in nothing but panties and my t-shirt. Please come get in this bed with me, Mrs. Lahey.”
Shit. He pulled out the last name card. He knew what that did to me.
“Dammit,” I muttered, and stormed angrily across our room. I crawled over the mattress to straddle him. I peeled off my t-shirt and his fingers wrapped around my throat, reeling me in for a kiss, gnashing together teeth and tongue.
“You really know how to get under my skin,” I murmured against his soft mouth, weaving my fingers through his hair to tug on his curls.
“That's exactly where I intend to be,” he said.
Isaac’s hands traveled up my thighs and cupped my ass. He roughly squeezed it, then swiftly smacked my ass. I yelped at the unexpected contact, then moaned as he rubbed the stinging area. He spread apart my cheeks and moved aside my underwear. Isaac slipped a finger into my folds and spread my wetness over my clit, circling the bundle of nerves slowly. Whiny little moans started tumbling from my lips. I was mewling and riding his hand.
“How about you ride my cock? Or are you still mad at me?” he mocked.
I rolled my eyes, removing the covers from his naked body and putting my fist around his shaft, holding it steady so I could spit on the tip. I spread the slick saliva all over his cock while he fucked my mouth with the fingers he just took out of my pussy. He knew I liked sucking on his fingers. They were long and elegant and pretty and I loved the way they reached the back of my throat.
I continued to stroke him, albeit needlessly. “Well, that didn't take long,” I observed out loud, staring at his very hard cock. “You must really like it when I'm mad. Do you just piss me off on purpose, honey?”
Isaac smirked. “Like you’re complaining. You like makeup sex as much as I do. So why don't you stop messing around,” Isaac continued, gently extracting my hand from his cock and lifting my hips so he was positioned at my entrance, “and take me where you really need me?”
I scoffed. “Me, need you? I think it’s the opposite way around.”
“Is that so?” He removed his hands from my body altogether, sat back, smirked, and crossed his arms over his chest. I stared back, unimpressed.
“Really.” I deadpanned. “You’re gonna stop now?”
Isaac shrugged. “It’s not like I need you.”
I glanced down. “Your raging boner suggests otherwise.”
“I can take care of that myself.”
“What, and pass this up? You like your hand more than my body?” Isaac remained unfazed, challenging me with one raised brow. “What was it you were saying earlier? Something about getting under my skin?” I wound my arms around his neck and kissed along his jawline. “Don’t you want to be inside me, baby?” Positioning myself on his thigh, I rode him the way I did the first time we fucked.
It was a while ago, but I still remembered our first time, the way Isaac’s mouth tasted like champagne and vanilla icing when I shoved him against his car, pulled him down by his tie, and kissed him.
“Remember the first time I rode you like this?” I asked. He grunted an affirmation. Isaac pressed his thumbs into my hip bones and guided my movements. His cocky pretense was gone, replaced by hazy lust. “It was right after Scott and Kira’s wedding. We fucked for the first time that night, and you made me come twice. In a fucking car.”
Isaac groaned. “You were incredible. I wanted you for so long and it finally happened.”
I let out a heady moan as my clit brushed against his leg in that perfect angle. “You felt so good inside me that night. I love the way you feel inside me, Isaac. Please, baby, I want you so bad, please fuck me...”
Isaac’s fingers weaved into my hair and he pulled me down to kiss me. “Are you fucking begging me?” In a flurry of movement, Isaac had me on my back, and positioned himself at my entrance. “This what you want?” He slid into me so fast and hard my eyes nearly rolled into the back of my head.
My back arched away from the mattress, and he wrapped his arm around my torso as he slammed into me relentlessly. “Fuck, how do you always feel so good?” He grunted into my shoulder. Suddenly, he stopped. A whiny little noise escaped my throat. “Turn over. Good girl, now stick your ass out.” He slapped my ass again, leaving it stinging and aching for more. “Higher, just like that. Wanna fuck you just like that...”
For the second time, Isaac entered me, sheathed hilt-deep in my pussy. Tthe new angle was making it hard to stay on my knees. He put his hand on my hip to hold me in place.
“Isaac, fuck,” I moaned, “I’m gonna come.”
He leaned down, placing a gentle kiss on my spine. “Good, me too,” he said.
Isaac snaked a hand around my hip and toyed with my clit. All the while he fucked me slow and deep, with his chest against my back, talking filth into my ear. My moans came out in silent mewls. Isaac’s pace was torturously slow.
“You hate it when I go slow like this, don’t you?” he muttered. “It’s too bad since I like taking my time with you.”
I could feel my orgasm bubbling up, so close to brimming over.
“Please, Isaac,” I moaned pathetically.
“Please, what?”
“Please let me come,” I whined.
“Shhh, baby, you’ll come soon enough. You’re just gonna have to be a little patient--oh, shit,” he said in response to me clenching around him. “Your pussy feels so fucking good, you’re so wet.” Isaac grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled, tugged sharply the way I liked it. “Is this what you wanted?” he muttered. He rubbed my clit in quick circles and rutted into me fast and deep. He came before me, and my walls milked out his orgasm before he sent me over the edge.
I dug my nails into Isaac’s shoulder as my body quivered. The jolts of pleasure continued for a good minute afterwards, and Isaac laid me on my side and cradled my body against him. He cupped my cheek and peppered soft little kisses all over my face.
“Shh, I got you,” he said softly.
When I finally came down from the high, in the clarity that followed, it occurred to me that I was no longer mad.
“I’m sorry,” I said quietly.
“Don’t be. I told you angry sex would be good.”
I chuckled. “No, I mean that you were right. About all of it. I’ve been working too much. We barely see each other.”
He kissed my forehead. “S’alright. I just get worried about you. You’re so stressed out all the time. And I miss you.” Isaac moved his fingertips against my back, tracing lazy, comforting circles.
“I miss you too.” I snuggled deeper into his chest. “I’ll cut back on work. Wanna spend more time with you.”
“Is that right? You’re actually gonna listen to me?” He feigned shock.
I giggled and lightly punched his arm. “Shut up.” I pressed a contented kiss against his chest, right above his beating heart. “Love you,” I mumbled as I dozed off. Isaac’s fingers combed gently through my hair, lulling me into slumber.
“Love you more.”
fin.
#isaac lahey#isaac lahey imagine#daniel sharman#daniel sharman imagine#stiles stilinski#stiles stilinski imagine#dylan o'brien#dylan o'brien imagine#isaac lahey smut#dylan o'brien smut#daniel sharman smut
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Yandere adult trio: college AU These are drabbles for when they lose their mind and kill the people around you... and kidnaps you
These are going to be a little longer than usual but I hope y'all enjoy it as much as I did when writing it (also im trying out the beta version of the new posting system so lemme know if anything is weird)
Sorry this took me forever bro
CW: murder, blood, physical abuse, alcohol
Hisoka
It's getting quite annoying to be completely honest. He just won't leave you alone, constantly flirting and making passes at you. And yet at the same time he makes fun of you and is actually very mean. It wasn't so bad in the beginning but this is just getting out of hand. You made sure he was aware of this. ---- He's looming over you as he corners you against the wall. You refuse to look up at him, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of a reaction.
While you aren't looking at him, you can feel him looking at you. You already know he has that annoying grin on his face that makes you want to punch him square in the nose.
He brushes his long fingers against your face, making a quiet humming noise. "Are you ready to give up my pet?"
You ignore his words and slap his hand away from your face. "I need to get to class, move Hisoka."
He frowns though you aren't looking at his face. He opens his mouth to say something when someone from behind him calls out to you. "Hey y/n! Are you okay?"
She walks towards you but before she can get involved you shove the man away and huff. What a nuisance. You turn towards him once you're standing next to your friend and glare at him.
"Leave me alone. It's annoying and it's scaring people. Got it?" Before he can respond you turn on your heels and drag your friend down the hall by her wrist just hoping to put distance between the two of you. ---- You're pretty sure you made it clear that you don't want him near you anymore. But by now you know he doesn't give up so easily. One can only hope that he gets bored of you and finds someone else to bother.
You and your friends went out for brunch earlier, and all was well until Chelsea handed you something. She said that she found it in her bag but it was addressed to you, so you put it in your own bag.
You pour yourself a rum and coke and make yourself comfortable on the couch of your shared apartment. All of your roommates went out for drinks but you were too tired to go out.
After taking a sip of the sweet liquid in your glass, you examine the letter you were given earlier. It's a typical white envelope with your name written in pen. There's no address on it or return address so you assume it was just supposed to be handed to you.
You rip open the letter with your finger and pull out the singular loose leaf paper. It's folded in three sections so you pull it open. The handwriting is messy but in an aesthetic sort of way.
Dear y/n, I strongly suggest that you go to class 406B in the technical building tonight. Don't be late or you'll miss the whole party. 10:45 pm - see you then. I almost forgot, if you don't come I have some revealing pictures of you that I can share with anyone I wish to. XOXO
This is the strangest letter you've ever received. It's probably a prank by one of your roommates or friends. You've never sent nudes to anyone so obviously they're bluffing.
Though perhaps you should entertain your friends and go. Who knows, maybe there will be drinks. But you are tired... Maybe you'll just go to bed. You peek over to the time on your phone, it's 9:12 pm. Yeah, you'll just go to bed after you finish your drink.
'bzz' 'bzzz'
Who is texting you so late at night? You sit up and realize you fell asleep on the couch. You wipe the drool off of your face and grab your phone with distain for whoever woke you up.
It's a blocked number.
ur late
Late? Late for what? Your phone displays the time, 11:27 pm. Are your friends really this committed to their prank? They must be trying to get Tik Tok famous or some shit. Well you're awake now, you might as well head over there.
----
The moment you step into the building something seems off. If all of the lights including the emergency lights wasn't enough, the ground seems sticky. Though you can't bring yourself to use your phone flash light to see what it is.
Eventually you find the room 406B in the darkness. The door is closed and no lights are on in the room. It seems as if no one is inside. As you reach for the handle of the door, you notice something on the window of the door. You can barely make it out, but there's what looks like a hand print. You chuckle, this must be a prank.
Now feeling a little better, you open the door and step inside. It's too dark to see anything but you can make out some figures in the dark. It must be your friends thinking they're being sneaky.
You roll your eyes and look for the light switch, finding it and switching it on. You squint at the sudden light, and your eyes begin to focus. Which you wish they never did.
There is blood everywhere, on the ceiling, the windows, the floor, the tables... But that's not the most jarring part. Your friends are sitting in chairs, one of them sitting on the ground against the wall.
There is your friend Chelsea, sitting in a chair with her head tipped down. You can't even tell what color her clothes originally were, they're covered in red, a dark dark red. Next to her is Derick, he's sitting the same way except his head is tipped backwards. His eyes are wide and his face is left in permanent horror- expressing the brutality of his end. You can't bare to look anymore, you drop to your knees and cover your face with your hands.
You scream and scream until your voice is hoarse and throat is raw. You're left coughing while you are drowned by your own tears.
"Are you ready to give up yet?" A deep voice asks from in front of you.
You can't stop the flow of tears as you look up at this monster. He's also covered in blood, and some is splattered on his face. He wipes a thumb across his face in the blood, and brings it to his lips. Sobs rack your body, you can't even make sense of this.
Hisoka squats down so you're face to face and grips your jaw bone tightly in his hand. You can feel the now cold substance being rubbed against your jaw by his fingers and it makes you want to puke.
"I got tired of waiting for you." His grin is nauseating, forcing you to stop yourself from puking.
His nails dig into your skin, mixing your own blood with that of your friend's. He brings his face close to yours and in a gentle but menacing tone he croaks, "Let's stop this childish game, alright y/n?"
Illumi
It's easy to miss things when you're caught up with the rush of classes and friends and love. All of the parties and hangovers are enough to satisfy your needs for entertainment and drama in this boring life. If you didn't fill up your daily life with these acts, you would probably sleep every day away until you fell into a coma.
To put it short, you're a busy body. And busy bodies don't have time to stop and look around at what is happening. For example, how were you to notice the key under your doormat was missing, or how your dresser drawers were left slightly open when you know you closed them before leaving. Noticing these small things are definitely not on your agenda.
It's 10 am, Saturday, and you don't have any classes or work today. You're sitting at the kitchen bar, drinking coffee and chatting with your roommate. It isn't often that you have a free day, and sometimes it is nice to have even if you want to get moving. The sun is peeking through the curtains and the aroma of espresso beans is a delight. It's a bit chilly so you have a blanket wrapped around your shoulders. What a peaceful morn-
'BANG BANG'
Your roommate eyes you when someone bangs on the front door, already knowing the events that are about to take place. She rolls her eyes and stomps up the stairs to her room, not wanting to get involved. You always feel bad that your roommates have to listen to this but you're really not sure how to end it.
You take your last peaceful sip of coffee and call out, "Come in!"
Before you can even finish your sentence, he storms inside and slams the door behind him. Your boyfriend of course is mad about something you've done. He trudges towards you and moves the stool next to you out of the way, and leans towards you so his face is next to yours.
"Are you kidding me y/n?!" He yells in your ear, but you don't flinch because you're used to this.
He rips his phone from his pocket and shoves it in your face after pulling up a screenshot. It's a conversation between you and his friend.
"Can't you learn to shut your damn mouth? This is our business and you have no right to tell anyone about it!" He's practically seething with rage.
You take a last sip of coffee and set your mug down on the counter. You continue facing forward and not facing him. "It's not our business, it's yours. And I asked him if it was true that you were cheating on me." You turn your head towards him while grimacing and mutter, "Again."
Ah but you've just lighted a bomb with your words.
His face has gone red and he looks like he's about to explode. You begin wondering why you were ever attracted to him.
"Maybe if you weren't such a prude! I can't even kiss my girlfriend whenever I want, it's ridiculous. You know full well that you're so... so... Ugh! You know what? Fuck you!"
As quickly as he came, he runs out of the house, slamming the door once again.
You whisper to yourself, "Fuck you too."
God he's such a child, you don't even want to be with him anymore. But every time you decide to break up with him he suddenly becomes Mr.Perfect. "I'm so sorry." "I love you." "Let me make it up to you." And then he does make it up to you only to tear down all of his hard work.
----
It's been a few days since your big fight with your boyfriend. He hasn't talked to you at all but this isn't uncommon for him. You promised your roommates that you would break up with him, not just for yourself but for the sake of their peace and quiet.
You texted him a few times while you were at work but he left you on read. He's so petty. So you text him one last time.
Come 2 my place at 8 tonight, We need to talk
He answers immediately which surprises you.
Can't, flat tire Come to my place
It doesn't make a difference to you where it is so that's fine. You wonder if maybe he's come to terms with the fact this needs to end. Hopefully so. If there's one thing you want him to be mature about, it's this.
Your shift ends at 6:30pm. You drive home, shower, get dressed, eat something and get ready to leave.
You send one last text,
OMW
It's read immediately but there's no response. Well, it's not like you expected much from him anyway. You drive to his house at 7:45 pm, and arrive around 7:58 pm. All of the lights in his town house are on. He's a few years older than you so he has his own house due to somehow being able to hold down a job. With his anger issues it's hard to believe that he can hold onto anything. Damn, he really is an unattractive person isn't he?
You step out of your car and lock it. Now that you're out of the car you realize that it's very quiet. This is unusual for when you go to his house, normally you can hear music or the sound affects of a shitty video game. But it's silent. Maybe he's waiting for you? He must be taking this well.
You step up the creaky stairs of the house, and knock on the equally as creaky door. No response. Maybe he's sleeping? You peek into the mail box and take out the extra key for the house from it. But when you go to unlock the door, it's already unlocked. This is becoming very strange.
You push open the door and peer into the dark living room. It's not too dark that you can't make out the furniture in the darkness. You step inside and shut the door behind you, it's still quiet. Not quiet, absolutely and undeniably silent. You flick the light on and look around again, nothing seems out of place. It's messy, with empty beer cans and bottles on the ground per usual. The stains on his carpet remain untouched, including the vomit stain in the corner.
"Jay?" You call out into the still atmosphere. Nothing. Is he not home? That can't be, his car is in the driveway.
The sound of his old floor boards being stepped on echoes through the house. What the hell is he trying to pull? You look up the stairs, but it's only darker up there than it was down here. He must be drunk.
Each step you take up the stairs, your heart begins to pound faster. Something feels off, this doesn't feel right. This isn't like your boyfriend, he's simple, he wouldn't try scaring you like this. On the top step, you feel your shoe touch something soft. You lean down and pick it up, and raise it up to your face. A pair of thongs that definitely aren't yours. So that's what's happening. He couldn't even pull himself together for one night.
Your pounding heart is no longer caused by fear but anger. He's cheated too many times to count on your hands, but this time makes you angrier than you've ever been. He's never been in bed with another woman knowing that you were coming over. This is fucking ridiculous.
You stomp towards his room and kick the door open. It's dark but you can tell that there are two people in bed. Your vision has gone red, you've never been this angry in your life.
You don't bother turning the lights on, you storm over to his side of the bed and rip the covers off. Just barely you can make out a woman sleeping next to him. You grab his shoulder tightly and shake him violently to wake him up.
"Get the fuck up Jay! Get! Up!" He doesn't respond, you lean down and yell in his ear like he always does to you. "You're such a childish piece of shit!"
He still doesn't move or speak, for fuck's sake. You stomp back to the entrance of the room and flick on the light. You turn around and begin walking back towards the bed, when you're stopped in your tracks.
Everything is red, but it's not your vision anymore. The bed has been dyed red, and his naked body is covered in it. Your mouths falls open but no screams come out. The woman next to him is splayed out on the bed, naked as well. Covered in red. You look down at the hands that touched your boyfriend, they're also red.
You rush over to the bed and shake your boyfriend again.
"Jay? Jay! Can you hear me?" You put your ear to his chest but you don't hear anything. You put your finger under his nose but don't feel anything.
"Hey! Hey! Wake up! This isn't funny!" Tears stream down your face as you pull him to your chest, cradling him.
Your sobs make it hard to speak and your chest begins to hurt. "J-... Jay... This- isn't-" You gasp between each word, "Funny..."
It's only when you hear a noise coming from behind you that you stop to think about what's going on. It doesn't matter to you though, they could kill you too if they wished.
"People are strange." You turn your head to see where the voice is coming from.
It's someone you don't recognize, he's tall, pale, has long hair, and hypnotizing eyes. Your sobs cease for a moment and you hug your boyfriend tighter to you.
"All of that fighting... You were even coming here to break up with him and yet... You're sad that he's gone?" He makes his way towards you slowly, "I've done you a favor, haven't I?"
He looms over you but all you can do is stand there, frozen by fear.
The man grabs the back of your shirt and pulls you violently from Jay. You try to run back to him, but the man pulls you to him, hugging you tightly. No matter how much you flail in his grasp you can't get away from him. You're left sobbing into his shirt, your body limp in his arms.
"Why?" You manage to whisper.
He holds you to him with one arm and pets your hair with his other hand. "You were miserable. He was making you miserable."
He sighs and kisses the top of your head. What is going on?
"Come on, don't waste your energy on human garbage. I'm here, so it's fine." He states it so 'matter of fact'.
"Who?" Is all you can ask, unable to finish your question.
"I guess I haven't introduced myself yet. Illumi is my name." With ease, he grabs you by your shoulders and lifts your face up to his. "Your future husband."
Chrollo
What more could you ask for? You already have easy college classes, fun parties, a good part time job, great friends, and an amazing best friend. Tonight you're going to hang out with a bunch of friends and have drinks at one of their apartments. It's a pretty normal Thursday night, nothing odd about it.
You're waiting for your best friend to pick you up, he's always there to pick you up on the dot. If he doesn't come early that is. You shove all the essentials into your bag and hear a honk outside. Must be him.
But of course you're always tardy. You lace up your shoes and run out of the dorm room, tripping out of the building. He's watching as you stumble towards the car since one of your shoes is already unlaced. When you finally flop down in the passenger seat he shakes his head with a knowing smile.
"Oh y/n, will you ever be organized?" He asks with amusement.
You click your tongue and straighten out your clothes, "Don't ask such stupid questions."
He turns his body towards you as much as possible and pats his lap. You instinctively know what that means. You hike your foot up above the console and put your foot on his lap. He begins tying your shoe, his smile is unmoving. He's always smiling.
"Chrollo, you don't need to baby me." You roll your eyes and groan.
He laughs and pats your leg, signaling that he's done. "If not me then who?"
You swing your leg back over to your side and buckle up. The two of you hang out a lot. Since you're both going to the hangout tonight, you decided to car pool. But first you're going to go get the alcohol. Everyone has to bring something for everyone, that way you guys can get wasted with no qualms.
You plug your phone into the aux and play your shared playlist. The first song that comes on is "The Cult of Dionysus" by The Orion Experience. Something that he added.
Finally you feel like you can relax, it always feels that way around Chrollo. His presence is just, comforting, in every way. You feel like you can do anything, say anything, ask for anything. He's always there for you with no exceptions and honestly you think you may have feelings for him. But it's a question of are you confusing comfort and friendly affection for romanticism. It's just that he's so perfect, he doesn't have a single flaw. Not one that you've ever seen at least. You probably never will see one of his flaws.
You sink into the seat and sigh.
He looks at you out of the corner of his eye, but quickly looks back at the road. "What's the matter?"
"Oh nothing... Just, everything is good."
He knows you better than anyone, so it's an obvious lie when you say this. "But what?"
Anytime he calls you out, you surrender and tell him everything. "Everything is so great you know." He nods with your statement. "I go to a good school, have good friends, have a good job." This has been on your mind for quite some time.
"Something is missing, you know? The excitement, the... the..." You chuckle and turn towards him and put up jazz hands, "The pizzazz!"
He doesn't turn to look at you but you know he saw you when his smile widens. "I get that. Maybe you just need to step outside of your comfort zone. Do something different."
Do something different? Yeah, maybe that is what you need.
----
All eleven of you are sitting in a circle on the ground, drinking and playing never have I ever. You take a long drink of your Mike's hard lemonade, which is just something to get the night going.
Dina wipes hair from her face and smiles, "Okay okay my turn. So never have I ever.... Uhh." She pops up when she thinks of something, "Never have I ever jumped out of a window."
DJ leans forward and raises an eyebrow, "Okay what kind of window we talking? High up? First floor?"
Dina answers, "Any kind, any kind of window." The majority of you put a finger down which makes the group burst out in laughter.
Your friend Zoey finishes off her bottle and slams it down on the floor. "Let's play something else."
"Like what?" One of your friends ask.
Zoey thinks for a moment, "Like... Truth or dare, spin the bottle. Or maybe eleven minutes in heaven."
Dj interjects, "I think it's seven minutes in heaven, not eleven."
"Oh whatever DJ, they rhyme." Zoey spits back.
Lex answers, "Let's play seven minutes in heaven!"
Of course DJ huffs and rolls his eyes, "What are we? Middle schoolers?"
Guac (which is his nickname) speaks up, "Oh come on, are you shy DJ?"
Finally the quiet Chrollo sitting next to you says something, "I'm not really interested. Right y/n?" He looks at you to back him up.
The group coos at the two of you and someone says, "We get it, you got something going on. The game is just for fun, don't be so serious Chrollo."
Chrollo opens his mouth to say something but you cut him off, "Hey, you told me to do something different. Maybe this is the first step."
His face shows betrayal and you feel a squeeze in your heart.
He stands up and glares at the group, "Whatever." He storms out of the apartment, and everyone mumbles to each other. Chrollo has never acted like this so this is quite a shock to everyone.
In order not to kill the mood you speak up, "Alright, let's pull names out of a hat!"
All of you write down your names on a small piece of paper and put it in a baseball cap. Dina pulls two names out of the hat and of course makes it a dramatic event.
"Alright so first we have the most lovely of people..." She looks at the group like a teacher waiting for an answer from her class. "Gracie!" Everyone claps and she stands up in front of all of you, taking a bow.
Dina pats her thighs rapidly, "Drum roll please!" Everyone obeys her, "The next hot piece of ass is y/n!"
You stand up and curtsey, taking Gracie's hand and leading her to the closet. Dina stands in front of the closet once both of you are inside and grins, "Timer starts now kids." She shuts the door on you two and all of your friends cheer from outside.
Here comes the awkward part. It's too dark to see her expression but you already know she's blushing.
You lean towards her and in a low voice so no one else can hear say, "We don't have to do this if you don't want to."
She shakes her head, and you brush a hand through her dark coils. The both of you giggle when your finger gets stuck in her hair. She leans in for a kiss, but before your lips meet you're interrupted.
The front door is opened and slammed shut, you hear the lock click as well.
"Hey Chrollo, you feeling better?" "What are you doing?" "Holy shit, please, what are you doing?!" "Are you fucking crazy? This isn't funny!"
Something slams against the closet door and Gracie yelps.
"Whoa whoa, we can work something out." They sound desperate "Back up!" You hear a loud thump and then screams. "Grab him guys!" It sounds like people are running around, but soon the screams become not those of only fear but of pain. There are gargled pleas and pathetic whimpers for mercy.
You and Gracie hold each other, gripping onto one another for dear life.
Soon the screams, pleas, thuds, gurgling, all of it ends. The apartment goes quiet and you try to silence your heavy breathing.
There's a loud thud right in front of the closet and then the doors are opened abruptly. There Chrollo is, covered in blood, and you can see the bodies of your friends behind him. Before you can react, he pulls Gracie away from you, slams the doors closed and there's another thud.
Gracie's screams are blood curdling, screeches and cries for help. You try to open the doors but something is blocking it, keeping them closed. As her screams get louder you throw yourself against the doors, trying to push whatever is there out of the way.
Before you can even imagine of getting out, the screams fade out into whimpers, and into nothing.
Holy shit holy shit holy shit.
You're given no time to think when the doors fly open and you're face to face with Chrollo. He's blocking out the light and his usually neat clothes are crumpled and bloody. You look down to his hands, a sledge hammer hangs from his fingers, dripping with your friend's blood.
"Ch-Chrollo... Please don't." You whisper.
The sledge hammer drops to the ground and he wraps his arms around you gently. "Oh y/n. I would never hurt you."
He's so gentle with you, so gentle. It almost makes you forget what just happened, because he feels like home. "Why? Why did you do this?"
He steps back and grabs your shoulders, he leans down so he's eye to eye with you. "They crossed a line, a line that should not be crossed."
You begin to speak but he grabs your cheeks with one hand and dawns his usual smile, "You don't need them. You have me." He kisses your squished lips as if it were normal. "Right y/n?"
Slowly you nod, you don't need them. If Chrollo says it, it must be true.
"Good girl."
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