#and it will all be obsessive and sad and beautiful
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warnings: perv!König, noncon groping, somno, titfucking
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Best Friend!König who’s obsessed with your tits.
You’ve known each other since childhood, and while he shot up in height, you shot up in bra size. And König noticed. Mien Gott, did he notice.
He was around fifteen when he realized for the first time just how nice your breasts felt against his big body when he hugged you, so soft and warm. He started taking any excuse to give you long, drawn out hugs—though of course he told himself it was just because he loved you so much. You were the only person who didn't bully him, after all.
He rationalized how his gaze started to end up on your cleavage more often than your face, too. He was just so tall, that even if he tried to look into your eyes—and he did, Schatz, he really did! You have to believe him, he tried so hard—he could see straight down your top, anyway.
And, well, he was no saint—just a man. And your tits were so pretty.
Could you really blame him for looking? He just wanted to admire you…
He always insisted on driving you places once he got his license—he was a good friend, after all, and he liked being useful. That he got to throw his arm out across your soft chest every time the car in front of him stopped too suddenly was just a bonus.
As the years passed by, his obsession grew—especially after he found porn. Most nights, he fisted his long, fat cock to videos of women who looked like you having their breasts played with, abused, worshipped. He preferred the latter, but he couldn’t deny there was something thrilling about the idea of slapping your soft tits and watching them jiggle. He would be sure to kiss them better after, though.
Once, after a particularly rough mission, König showed up at your place beaten to hell, eyes scarily hollow. You immediately let him inside, pulled him down onto your couch, and held him as he cried. He laid his head on your chest, seeking the comfort only your breasts could give him, and you shushed him softly as you petted his hair. He wished desperately in that moment that he could pull your top down, latch onto one of your cute little nipples, and suckle to his heart’s content, but he settled for leaning more and more of his weight on you until you had to lay back on the couch, him on top of you with his face buried in between your tits as he feigned sleep.
He was far too heavy for you to move yourself, and clearly, you felt bad for him, because you let him stay like that the whole night rather than wake him up.
On your twentieth birthday, König made sure he would have two whole weeks of leave, so he could spend time with you and your perfect breasts. He didn’t have the best relationship with his family, and you didn't have a roommate at Uni, so you let him stay in your dorm. You weren’t going to make your best friend sleep on the floor, of course, so the two of you shared a bed. Nothing untoward happened until the fourth night, when you both got outrageously drunk. You curled up in the tiny bed together when you got back from the pub, and promptly knocked out.
When you woke up the next morning, though, it was to one of König’s massive paws slipped under the neck of your dress, cupping your left tit.
To say you freaked out was an understatement.
You jumped up like you arse was on fire, hollering at him, demanding to know what the fuck he thought he was doing. König, who had been dead asleep, actually fell out of the bed, looking up at you for once, his big, perpetually sad eyes wide with complete confusion and a little bit of fear. When he realized what you were accusing him of, he started stuttering apologies, mortified with himself. You thought it was because he had unintentionally groped you in his sleep, which was partially true. But the main reason he was so upset was because he hadn’t even gotten to enjoy it. He’d held your beautiful breasts for the very first time and he hadn’t even known! The thought made him tear up, and you quickly forgave him, telling him that you believed him—"Accidents happen."
Every time it happened after that, König let you believe it was still an accident.
The more time he spent in the military earning his fearsome reputation and seeing terrible horrors, the bolder he grew. Now, when he visited you in your flat and gave you those sad puppy eyes until you let him sleep in bed with you rather than on the couch, he did not merely cup your breast at night. He played with your nipples, rolling the sensitive little buds between his fingers, tugging and pinching and delighting in the sleepy sounds of pleasure you let out. You tended to wake up if he got his mouth on them though, so he restrained himself—at least until he was able to get you drunk. You slept like dead when you were wasted, and he had free reign over your amazing tits. He squeezed and sucked, kissed and licked, even fucked them, once. He’d been a little drunk too, that night, or he wouldn't have risked it—but seeing his massive cock nestled between your breasts was like a revelation. He found God in the warm embrace of your tits, and he made an offering in the form of his seed, spilling it all over your chest, neck, and lips.
It felt blasphemous to clean his come from your skin, like he was desecrating a sacred altar, but he knew you would hate him if you discovered what he’d done. And he couldn’t have that—he loved you, he always had and always would. You and your heavenly breasts.
#konig fanfiction#konig call of duty#könig modern warfare#konig headcanons#konig cod#konig smut#konig x you#konig x reader#könig fanfiction#könig x you#könig smut#könig x reader#könig cod#könig call of duty#könig#call of duty fic#call of duty fanfic#call of duty#cod fic#cod fanfic#cod smut#call of duty smut#perv könig
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soulmates - jude bellingham
“a soulmate is someone who challenges you to do better, someone who can’t stand seeing you sad, someone who stays faithful, loyal and committed to you, someone who helps take care of you when you’re sick, someone who stands by your side through the good days and the bad days and someone who wants to grow old and grey with you”
if jude could picture the perfect person, it would be you. from the moment he had laid eyes on you, he knew you were something special.
you had met him through one of your friends, it had been your friends’ birthday and they had thrown a party to celebrate. after 5 minutes of arriving, you had bumped into jude navigating your way through the swarm of people at the party. as soon as your eyes locked, jude had been captivated by your beauty.
the way your doe eyes lit up, the blush formed on your cheeks by the heat of the room and the bright smile on your face as you looked at him, made his stomach do somersaults. he hadn’t seen anyone as beautiful as you, he knew he had to speak to you. throughout the night, you both were stuck by each others’ side all night - laughing at eachothers’ silly jokes, laughing at the semi-drunk people around you, it couldn’t of been a more perfect night.
you had exchanged numbers before leaving the party, as soon as you left, jude had messaged you straight away asking if you had enjoyed the party and if you had gotten home safely. from then, you kept contact with eachother regularly.
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to say jude was obsessed with you, was definitely an understatement. whether it was at training or speaking to his family or one of his friends, he’d always mention you in his conversations - he couldn’t help it, he was reminded of you wherever or whatever he was doing, it was like you were stuck in his mind. jude wanted to be around you whether it calling you, texting you or seeing you, he just loved the feeling of you being in his life. jude loved spending time with you, even if it was just the both of you sitting down doing absolutely nothing, he enjoyed it. you were one of the few people who he felt safe and happy with, you were his person and he adored the hell out of you.
jude was one of those people that no matter what, always made you feel special. he’d always surprise you with getting your favourite flowers delivered to your house if he wasn’t around to show and let you know that no matter where he was, he was thinking of you and that he was missing you, he always wanted to show you the affection that you deserved. even after a tough training session, he’d stop by to see you. you loved being around jude, and he loved being around you, you both were like a breath of fresh air to eachother no matter how long you’d been seeing eachother.
as time went on, jude had started to fall for you more and more each day, he couldn’t help but not too. jude had mentioned you to his family, always praising you and telling them how much you meant to him, and how excited he was for them to meet you. family is an important factor in jude’s life, so to have you all together, would be so important to him. his family especially his little brother jobe, were happy for jude to have finally found someone, especially someone who’s been able to bring the spark back into his life - they were excited to meet you.
“you know there’s no one else I’d rather be with other than you? you really do make every day worth living and i enjoy spending any bit of time I have with you” jude said to while standing outside of your house, dropping you off after another successful date.
“i love spending time with you too jude. i haven’t met someone like you who makes me laugh so much or makes me feel so comfortable before” you gushed, while brushing your hand on his cheek, while his hands found your waist and pulled you close.
“i feel the same y/n, you’ve made me the happiest i’ve felt in a very long time. there’s never not a time where i’m not thinking when i’ll see you again or thinking about you. i just want to be with you all the time, i just want you around all the time. so i was wondering if you wanna be my girlfriend?” jude said nervously. you could tell he was nervous, the grip he had on your waist had loosened and he begun to chew bottom lip as he waited for your answer. “i understand i-if you say n-no it is too soon and i-” he started once again before you interrupted him with a beaming smile.
“aw jude, of course i want to be your girlfriend. you don’t know how long i’ve been waiting for you to ask me” you said giggling while putting your arms around his neck softly.
jude laughed softly before he pulled you into a soft hug. his head instantly fell the crook of your neck and he began to place soft and delicate kisses on your neck as you hugged. liking the softness of his kisses along your neck, you decided to tilt your head back and to enjoy the feeling more. he placed a few more on your neck, before pulling away and leaning his head onto yours which made stand up onto your tiptoes before kissing him softly. you both sighed happily into the kiss, very thankful for this sweet moment and how excited you were to be jude’s girlfriend.
as you and jude kissed, he begun to think about how his life has changed dramatically so quickly. he always knew you were special, and sometimes he joked but seriously thought you was his guardian angel. once upon a time, he was in the most dark and fragile time of his life. he didn’t think that he’d be able to come back after the hard times at all. then you came along into his life unexpectedly, protected and guided him throughout the journey and helped him to feel like him again.
jude couldn’t help but fall in love with you, as everything shattered, you came along and picked all the pieces up and fixed it. jude was finally as happy as he could be; all because of you, because you saved him and knew from the moment he met you, you were soulmates and you’d find eachother in every lifetime no matter where you guys were.
#jude bellingham#jude bellingham fic#jude bellingham fics#jude bellingham fanfiction#jude bellingham imagine#jude bellingham imagines#jude bellingham angst#jude bellingham smut#jude bellingham fluff#jude bellingham one shot#jude bellingham x you#jude bellingham x reader#jude bellingham social media au#jude bellingham x y/n#jude bellingham fanfic#jude bellingham comfort#jb22#jb5#bellingham latest#real madrid
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I’ve had a couple people ask me about the results on this quiz and wanted to see the other options, so here’s all the descriptions I wrote for the recommended shows down below:
Uquiz Podcast Descriptions
[Unseen - A short urban fantasy show where each episode is a different monologue from someone in the unseen world! Incredible music, writing, and performers. Some of the episodes are really genuine and sad, some are fast paced and comedic. You get something new every time - a college class lecture, a voicemail, a tour, a story. I love this show and I highly recommend it!
Red Valley - A sci-fi mystery with amazing writing and performances - a show about the scientists behind cryogenic technology, and the people that got mixed up in it all accidentally. I'm obsessed with this one and cannot wait for the next season!
Malevolent - A Lovecraftian horror about a detective with the voice of a mysterious entity stuck in his head. You've got to take notes for this one. This show is devastating, emotional, terrifying, and one of the most beautiful pieces of media I've ever enjoyed. You should really give this one a try! The sound design, writing, and voice acting are all insane - especially because it's all done by one creator.
Camp Here and There - For this show, you get the mealtime announcements from the loud speakers at an unusual summer camp in Ohio. Enjoy paranormal happenings, drama among the camp counselors, and a banger soundtrack (yes, by Will Wood. I still have no idea why.)
Death by Dying - Absurdist comedy. A very thorough obituary writer tries to get to the bottom of every mysterious death his column covers. This show has wordplay, nice gothic vibes, and a strange little town with far too many strange little deaths.
Welcome to Nightvale - This show is a classic among audio drama podcasts, having started in 2012 and still going strong. Every episode is a radio broadcast from the bizarre little town of NIghtvale, located somewhere in the desert. Tune in for news, traffic, sports, sponsors, horoscope, and the weather, none of them what you'd expect. You should really listen to some of this one if you haven't yet
Wolf 359 - This might just be my all-time favourite show - a long form scifi about a small crew aboard a spaceship orbiting a distant star. Things start innocently enough, but this show builds in drama and mystery quickly. Incredible soundtrack, writing, and performances! Intrigue! Witty writing! Amazing actors! SPACE!!! This show has everything and I love it very much
The Amelia Project - A comedy about an agency that fakes people’s deaths. This show has fun characters, absurd situations, and a banger of a theme song. Each season feels completely unique, but I always have fun listening to this one
Sherlock and Co - This is the best modern adaptation of Sherlock Holmes that I know of. For being set in 2023 - 2024, the stories are insanely book-accurate! This show is done as an in-world true crime podcast, so it's very immersive. The actors are incredible, and the theme song is fantastic
The Magnus Archives - The recordings of a paranormal research institute's archived statements. Things gradually start connecting across stories, and everything starts becoming more complicated for our characters working at the institute. This show is long at 200 episodes (with a developing sequel) and has some amazing writing and performances! It explores all kinds of horror imaginable, while being centrally about the characters and humanity. You'll enjoy this one 100%
The Bright Sessions - Here's the thing. The original show is good, but the sequel is definitely more of my kind of show. Bright Sessions is a long form series about the patients of a psychologist that works with people who have special abilities. It's pretty sweet and mostly about character relationships, but the sequel show AM Archives is a scientific thriller/survival show about ethical dilemmas in medicine and patient care - it also has more in the way of music and sound design. Both shows are really well done, with incredible performers and writing!
Deviser - A short form horror that I can't explain too much of without spoiling the entire thing, but this show is AMAZING! It's the most terrifying thing I've ever heard done in audio, so be prepared for that. It's got it all - insane sound design, performance, writing, and music, all done by one creator. If you want a dark speculative fiction about humanity and our relation to artificial intelligence, with a dog, then give this one a try
Zero Hours - A short series of one-off episodes spanning time in ninety-year increments, all with the theme of the end of the world. I truly love this show - each episode is devastating in a different way. The actors, sound design, and music are all incredible, and the show is produced by my favourite audio fiction team. Please listen to this one, you WILL enjoy it
Time:Bombs - This show is short at only three episodes - the fast paced account of a bomb disposal team on one night - New Year's Eve. There's a surprising amount of character development and heart for such a short story in this one, and you can listen to the whole thing in one setting, take the quiz again, and find another show! I'm kidding of course but I do love this show. The creators made the whole thing in one week, which is insanely impressive
Wooden Overcoats - This show proves that the only difference in tragedy and comedy is your point of view. A sitcom about two rival funeral homes on a tiny island off the coast of France with far more absurd deaths than you might think for such a lovely little community. This is honestly one of my favorite shows of all time, and I know you'll enjoy it too. It's incredibly good - the performers and gothic orchestral soundtrack are amazing, the writing witty and fast paced, and I know my descriptions aren't giving this show any justice. It's that good. Go listen to it.
Alice isn’t Dead - Poetic and terrifying, this show is about a truckdriver searching America for her wife, whom (as the title suggests) she thought was dead. If you're into the idea of the endless and lonely expanse of the American mid-west as horror, then this is the show for you!
Re: Dracula - The novel Dracula by Bram Stoker is conveniently made up of journal entries, letters, and newspaper articles all corresponding to certain dates. With this in mind, the podcast Re: Dracula released each day's events as written in the book in high-quality audio format! Essentially, this is just a really good audio book, with full cast performances, sound effects, and a haunting musical score. For fans of the book already, or anyone who enjoys gothic horror and literature
Cry Havoc! Ask Questions Later - You didn't know you wanted an ancient Roman political comedy, did you? Well, you do. And the good news is, this show is perfect for you! It starts just after the unfortunate murder of Julius Caesar, when the financially struggling republic of Rome has turned to its new triumvirate for support. The three of them, however, are having a bit of trouble managing the world-superpower. This show is great, with incredible writing, performances and soundtrack. The story's got it all: intrigue, forbidden love, rivalries, and theatrics. Enjoy!
Trice Forgotten - Listen to this show if you like stories about PIRATES! Or if you're into shows with incredible soundtracks, intrigue, immersive soundscapes, and women sword fighting each other.
The White Vault - Long-form found footage horror about scientists dealing with paranormal happenings while trapped at a research base in the snow. Very technical and linguistic, so if you're into that, then you should give this show a try!
Fawx and Stallion - If you hate the Sherlock Holmes books then this show is for you, because this is about a different mystery solving team in Victorian London. It's a comedy about the neighbors of literature's most famous detective having to solve a major mystery as, essentially, the backup team. This show is very fun, and I look forward to the next season. You should definitely give it a listen!
New Year’s Day - This show releases one episode per year, on New Year's Day. Two magicians agree to meet up and talk every thirteen years since a performance stunt left them both immortal. There's only three episodes of this out at this point, so come back in a couple decades and let me know how it turns out! It's already really good!]
Made a quiz :DD -
#audio drama#i was really proud of my descriptions hehe#i need to make a new quiz I’ve found so many new shows since I made this
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holy fuck I love poetry. I love poetry deep in my soul. it cradles me like my mother should. holding me in its arms when I cry. or when I dont. when I feel hollow and cold. warm spreads through me with my words.
#one day#I will become#famous#for my words#my beautiful#words#I will#publish books#and it will all be obsessive and sad and beautiful#it will be okay#I will be okay#I will be happy#also side note#ive been listening to#aurora#recently#and she's really good#shout out to her#following#for you#for you page#following page#poetry
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they say the captain goes down with the ship...
#fobedit#patrick stump#fall out boy#fob#what a catch donnie#anni edits#i'm literally so obsessed with sad beautiful sea captain patrick god#he looks so gorgeous and sad and beautiful in this video in his little outfits#my fav sad boat man... beautiful don't cry you're the most gorgeous creature on all of earth#god why does this vid make me so emosh actually. the seagull he tenderly nurses back to health#is pete the sad seagull w the broken wing that patrick patches up#and laughs with and has to let go?? anyway god idk stan what a catch video
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I am slowly reading all of @keycarabiner ‘s work on ao3 and it’s ruining my LIFE YOUR WRITING MAKES ME FEEL INSANE.
THIS is a scene from their fic ‘Storge’, this fucking. Sick snapshot of a camp halfblood au with Aphrodite kid Steve, and…. Mysterious Eddie…. OOOOO THE DRAMA
#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#I love the drama of a Percy Jackson au#Steve’s distance from his parents is so spicy when it has this layer of like#pride. and sadness at being abandoned#him having to question all his relationships#and how he could finally have true friends at camp halfblood without fear?#but ALSO. NOT BEING ABLE TO RELY ON HIS ‘CHARISMA’#AND EDDIE.#Eddie the banished Eddie the freak#obsessed#also key if you’re reading this#I want to eat your brain#your writing is beautiful
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Betty is so relatable I would do the same shit for my wife
#simon petrikov#original#at#the moment where she declares that she's jumping into the future to save him. just pure save-husband impulse#and maybe she made the wrong choice but I felt the emotion in my gut and that's good tragedy baby#I would do the same thing and then be in the future and realize I probably fucked up but also what else could I do but#devote my entire life and sanity to saving her after I have destroyed every other option??#it's not healthy necessarily but a fucking apocalypse happened and her wife is in eternal torment. what else could she possibly do??#I'm just obsessed with the attitude she has towards saving him and how it turns from joyful heroism to unhealthy obsession#I have a much healthier relationship with my wife. but also she's never been driven mad by a magical crowd for a thousand years!#and Betty did it!! y'all can argue about whether Ice King was better than Simon and I think he must make peace with every part of himself#but it is extremely consistent in the original series that being Ice King is basically this existentially horrifying Eternal torture#so the fact that someone who loved him decided they would save him from that at all costs is very sad and very beautiful#beautiful because no one deserves to suffer forever. tragic because she was far to willing to take his place if she had to.#betty grof#fionna and cake#golbetty#golb#*driven mad by a magical crown#you forgot your floaties#edit: upon rewatching every episode with betty in it i will say i don't think i would be so hellbent on murdering the person she had become#betty does act selfishly and it makes her character more compelling#but i like to think if my wife went banana-pants ice-king-level bonkers i would be able to love that version of her too#but who's to say whether this story would be the reason I responded differently?#it's a good story
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I am seeing so many of my lovely mutuals on here feeling down about the fandom, their content and other stuff
and I just want to grab you all by the face, look you in the eyes, and tell you how fucking fabulous you all are, and don't you EVER STOP WRITING, or doing what you love. Because you are fucking amazing and you bring so much value and joy to this fandom, just by being a part of it.
#i love you all so so so much#and you all are the reason why I enjoy coming back to tumblr after 10 years#interacting with yall and screaming at yall over our obsession#you are all beautiful and worthy of being on here#I wish I could do more to help these feelings#but I just want to spread the love to everyone :(#and it makes me sad to see my mutuals sad
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✨When you get this, list 5 songs you like to listen to, publish. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite accounts (Positivity is cool)!!🎶✨ /nf
AHHHH CAITIE ☹️❤️ thank u for thinking of me ☹️❤️ u are the awesomest ever 🫶 choosing just five songs was very tough !!! i ended up just choosing 5 of my all-timers :)
#maybe 5 of the best songs ever made#engine notably was my post-grad song this past spring#like i listened to it constantly while pre-grieving all my friends moving off campus and out of town/state 😭#it’s so excellent…#sun bleached flies is maybe my fav off preachers daughter??? but it’s very hard to choose#every song is insanely good on there#album of all time#my biggest flex is i’ve been listening to ethel since 2019#like i’m obsessed with her#i can and i will another post-grad song another song of all time#searows is so underrated everyone should listen to him#his music is so beautiful and he has like no bad songs#sex the 1975 is just like. one of my top 3 of all time.#i think matty healy needs to either become a recluse or die#but god damn#he has made some great tunes#and fatal !!! my fav song ever probably#she and i have so much history…#miw has been one of my fav bands forever they really carried me through middle school#and fatal is their best song and it’s so underrated it makes me so sad#anyway#thank u caitie !!!#not self ship#rye responds !
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One day when I have a partner and we’re adults we’re going on a stargazing date this is beautiful
#stars#pretty like the stars#I say Partner I mean a romantic relationship#if ever#we all know I’m sad and single and struggling#but it could be really fun#we’d wear like warm clothes and it would be really clear and we’d have tea or some hot drink#and we’d be in a field or a park in the middle of no where in the middle of the night#I’d love that so much#well hey ho now I’m crying out my window while listening to music because I’m perpetually single#I spent two hours obsessing over a random lesbian on TikTok because she was funny and rather attractive so that’s how my love life is going#damn using the tags as my life story is so fun#I’m shivering now and my toes are going to fall off but THATS OK#come with me by chxrlotte is playing#it’s such a good song to listen to it#I’m done with the multitude of tagging now#HAVE A GOOD SUNDAY#I Take that back the tagging is coming back#I look like one of those Pinterest pictures of people sitting on their windows gazing wistfully at the stars#which is what I’m doing I suppose#they’re so pretty though stars are beautiful#aesthetic Pinterest picture goals guys take notes#aside from the shivering this is good#my current existential crisis
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red flag: someone says that copper in minecraft is useless
#mc#my post#minecraft... the building game.... having materials primarily used for... building.... unheard of#they probably think banners are useless too. and end rods and purpur and#decoration IS A USE. its a building game. not everything needs to only be used for tools or combat or redstone whatever#im mostly heated about this because i knew someone who was obsessed with old and very much utilitarian ugly ass tech#and they would DIE on the hill that copper is completely useless#YES they were the type to just dig a whole in a hill and that was their base. no fancy spot or pretty walls#literally just a dirt hole in the first place they decided to stop for the night#and the only reason it would become more than a sad bedroom was for whatever tech mod stuff theyd mess with#and yes the tech mod stuff wasnt build satisfyingly either#this was a mf who couldnt appreciate art even if they were looking at the most beautiful piece in the world i swear#at a meetup with them and some other friends. the mall we went to had a store that was entirely the type of tech this person loved#and let me tell you my brain was rotting from the boxy blacks and greys of it all. not a single thing in that store to stimulate my brain#but they were running around like a child in a candy shop#no hate to literally anyone else who likes that stuff. but this particular person sucked just in general. so i like shit talking them#i got very off track#i should make a meme wait#minecraft
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Having very strong feelings about Dead Boy Detective's rn
#Dead boy detectives spoilers#I... need to re-watch it#I'm so obsessed with Charles' and Edwin's relationship both in a platonic and shipping way#Ngl slightly sad Niko x Crystal not a thing#that sprite glow had lesbian potential#anyway I must go because I miss Charles' face#He is so beautiful it's overwhelming#I knew I'd like him but I didn't know HOW MUCH#Honestly I do just love them all though
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what if i said i ship sky and viktor
#[holds sky's mostly uncharacterized ass] i think she's neat#need to watch the show again to make sure i didn't miss anything but ill forever be sad she had no importance in s1#but like i get it her whole thing revolved around viktor 🙄 and the show has no lack of well written women#but sky on god i will mold you with my own hands#i know nothing about league of legends but i searched 'sky league of legends' and all i got was the word sky like cielo in some map/locatio#and a real guy who plays league of legends who is apparently good enough to have a wiki idk i didn't care enough to read#but like. grabs sky in my hands and molds her#bluebird.txt#listen i am a little obsessed w viktor. i am a little obsessed w sky's potential.#how do i feel about jayvik?#honestly i kinda don't care about jayce that much unless i'm watching the show at that moment#i'm neutral on jayce#jayvik is like oh they're neat i love that but viktor is my main man yk#also jayvik is like i like it cuz thats kinda my shit sort of ish but i don't LOVE it bc the show was just too damn rushed#i will say i'm obsessed w the art though their shiny forms are just beautiful and people's art is beautiful#but like. SKY!!!#i get it it's oh unrequited crush cuz he's like I Have To Find The Solution and then his guilt over her#results in her ghost haunting him#so i get that that's kind of the point of her#and again no lack of cool women but like. come on man 😭#sky i love you#arcane
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i hate my uni sm lol i dont want to be heeeeere let me out let me out
#motherfucking dance classes. we have the exam in two weeks and the choreography's not ready.#we gotta meet up in our own free time without the professor and practise on our own and try out if something works or doesnt. on. our. own.#bitch like what are you getting paid for lol#i hate it here so much i didnt come here to dance#and i leave every rehearsal on the verge of a panic attack and with red welts down my arms from scratching myself to calm tf down lol#(ask me again why i became obsessed with the white haired beautiful princess with a disorder in record time lol I GET HIM)#its fucking mental torture to me lol#anyway now im getting passive aggressive comments in the groupchat because they suddenly decided that we need to meet#for another rehearsal. today in two hours. like bitch????? sorry that i have earlier plans??????#i gently suggested that we should try to set the rehearsal plans earlier#and i even put a sad emoji at the end to show that im not trying to be a bitch lol#and now a girl im like actually friends with goes all 'thank you for your input jagoda im waiting for you to suggest something better' like#girl?????????? lol#but like it's whatever. apologised immediately ofc like why bother#anyway BASTA
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Fat Man on a Beach (HTV, 1974)
"I'm going to read some more poems now. Erm. It may be that if you want to go and have a cup of tea, this would be a good time. I know that's what you masses are like. The mention of poetry and off you go."
#fat man on a beach#b.s. johnson#classic tv#documentary#htv#michael bakewell#aled vaughan#a frankly incredible and truly unique piece of television. according to Johnson's biographer‚ the novelist Jonathan Coe‚ this film was#described in tv listings at the time as a documentary about Porth Ceiriad‚ a rather beautiful beach on the Llŷn Peninsula in North Wales#it.. is not that. i can only imagine the baffled reactions of an idle audience tuning into HTV in 1974. true‚ this is entirely filmed at#Porth Ceiriad‚ but any element of travelogue (or even really of documentary) is dispelled almost immediately: the first lines heard are#those of an unseen narrator who tells us we are about to watch a film about a fat man on a beach. 'Do you really want to watch that?' he#asks incredulously. it's a challenge‚ the first of several from Johnson‚ who spends the next 40 minutes variously pottering about the sands#mugging to the camera‚ reciting poetry (his own and others; literary and dirty) and baring his soul. I've never seen anything quite like it#I'm not sure that much has been made that is quite like it tbh. Johnson was a fiercely original‚ brilliant mind; he was a novelist#a poet‚ a critic and a filmmaker. he was also‚ when this first aired on uk tv‚ dead. a few weeks after completing filming on this‚ his#final work‚ he sadly took his own life. i mention it not as a grim factoid but because it is a vital contextualisation of this film; the#play has been described before (and play is not the right word) as a sort of loose form manifesto from Johnson‚ a laying out of his own#peculiar philosophies and interests in a disjointed manner‚ peppered with asides and distractions and filming mishaps (all kept in the#final product). for me‚ the feeling was inescapable that this was like viewing a suicide note. whether Johnson had already come to some#conclusion on that front or not‚ the fact is that his own obsession with morbidity‚ with the spectre of death and of decay (it runs right#through his work‚ particularly his work in film) transforms this into something almost confessional. there's a section of the film where#the author recalls witnessing the aftermath of a traffic accident‚ a motorcyclist thrown through wire fencing and sliced like cheese#the absurdity of the comparison is lingered on‚ Johnson almost stalls and appears to lose his train of thought (briefly discussing instead#the modern mass production of cheese) but he also seems clearly affected‚ delivering the tale in a halting‚ reverent tone#not that this is all darkness and gloom; it's just as often funny‚ or surreal (the film frequently cuts away to a bunch of bananas‚ only#later explained by one of Johnson's biographical recollections) and includes visual puns‚ bad jokes and a few moments of physical comedy#the writer doesn't seem distressed. rather‚ he seems... if not at peace‚ then as though he has come to terms. confident in his own beliefs#and ideals. but perhaps that's reaching too far‚ or reading in what the viewer wishes to read in. the sad fact is that Johnson took his own#life‚ but he left us with a body of work unlike almost anything else‚ and which is still being celebrated and analysed today. rip bsj
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more bullshit
#this is such a good way to spend my time Im so fucking busyyyy#this also actually made me realise that its the second time ive drawn denmark as patrick/christian bale and its like. well its true but im#insane also#ive been wanting to do the fernanfloo meme for 50 years though because that most litearlly is already his outfit#but well anyways i got to give him a spiffy alternative fancy outfit that im kind of obsessed with#it may be that he doesnt have his stupid headband for 5 minutes or the bullet wound swagger but well i like him#litearlly no body is going to understand the context of the first meme until like. 6 volumes of my comic come out im crazy#well whatever. its for me ok.#i should have been working on my berserk drawing but instead.#my ranting#do you guys understand how long it took me to find the christian bale image without the goth bugs bunny i wanted to kill myself#then all i had to do was google ''christian bale so cunty'' and the second image on google was the fucking post...like goddd#''why is denmark in heaven'' well because the inbetween is all clouds so the backgrounds always are white please pleaspelaplseplease#i know i backed myself into a cornerrr thereee but pleaseee#Pleaseee#with that logic he should also be wearing completely white clothes unless theyre his normal outfit but i figured that would look Really Wei#Weird so i didnt do it#im aware no one cares and im inflicting these rules upon myself ok well the illness#...which is why i also tried to fit kyles binder beneath the dress which he would never wear bc of the dysphoria but i figured ok well. idk#the binder was built into the dress or something idk idk dont think about it too hard#''dont think about it too hard'' is the hardest thing 4 me. well i will think about it soo hard unfrotuantely#its 5 am#my art#kyle batillo#denmark newman#kar#it feels really weird to draw the 2 of them without ilya there. its like going to a hotel without the cuck chair.#like wheres my beautiful third wheel scowling in the background#cady will you tell him his hair looks sexy pushed back OK SORRY i should rewatch meangirls. for the millionth time#sad you cant see his giant gauges bc hair is covering but just remmeber theyre there k drew them.....
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