#and it was bc I'm looking at the very post I reblogged but somehow ??????

[flufflecat]

happy pride month, im so glad to see people doing fun new varieties of ace discourse this year -_-

[shirogane-oushirou]

hi, i had a dream that my family and i were on vacation and i met a guy who wasn't ren but looked almost exactly like him. he was a linguist and very, very cute. we were immediately flirty, and when my family was being My Family, i'd go over to his place and we'd parallel play read together. i woke up before we could actually kiss (my family kept interrupting), but we were otherwise very affectionate. at one point i fell asleep against his shoulder and he shifted so it'd be more comfy + so he could hold me closer aughhghghh he was so nice to lean against. anyway. feeling normal about him rn.

[capisback]

I have read every word in this text carefully and am certain I have not missed anything *reblogs post/publishes fic/etc* *a whole, previously hidden paragraph is suddenly revealed* aw fuck

[1-800-kami]

R U MINE? feat. gojo satoru

gojo satoru has got to be the picture definition of a stereotypical college frat boy. he’s cocky, loaded with his daddy’s money, and dangerously handsome. it seems like common sense to stay away from him since you’ll never get more than a one-night stand out of it. 

that’s why you choose to turn a blind eye once you’ve come to the horrific realization: you’re in love with him. and you’re just itching to ask…

“are you mine tomorrow? or just mine tonight?”

IMPORTANT: part two is out! read here :)

content: 8k words, afab!reader, angst! fluff! heartbreak! n everything in between! implied smut, rich college frat boy gojo and hellcat driver geto 🤑, emotional rollercoaster, reader has a toxic ex, trust issues (?) gojo is absolutely insufferable, misunderstandings, use of words hoe, slut, etc., mutual pining, some jjk character cameos (wink wink) me writing very unfunny dialogue, no bc wtf is this, cheating implications, emo gojo (the worst warning of them all)

author's note: hello hello! my name is kami, i've been reblogging fics on tumblr for a while now but i've recently figured out how to work this hellsite, so i'm going to start posting fics that i write! thank you to those who enjoyed my nanami drabble <3 kisses 4 u all.

this fic IS split into two parts and there is smut in the second part. so just. prepare yourselves for that ig.

reblog and interact for a kiss ;)

“so… let me get this straight.”

“go ahead.”

shoko takes a deep breath, and you just somehow know that she’s pinching her nose in exasperation right now. “utahime dragged you out to a party in hopes that you would hit it off with somebody. you wander off on your own and later, she sees you and gojo–THE gojo satoru–giving you his number?!”

“uh, yeah. that’s exactly what happened.”

“do you even understand what you’re getting yourself into?! that man bags hoes like they’re pokemon!” you readjust the phone against your ear and sigh at shoko’s comment. 

“okay, first of all, never say that again. second, i rejected all of his advances. i didn’t even save his number.” you stare at the crinkled-up note in your hands, which proudly displays his number and a slick call me if you change your mind ;). you wonder if you could sell this paper to his fangirls–you’d surely make a little bit of cash out of it. “i’ve seen gojo around. i know that i shouldn’t mess with him. plus, he was drunk as hell at the party; i doubt he even remembers my name. to him, i’m just some chick that he’s frustrated at because she didn’t want to fuck him the second she saw him.”

“do you… do you share any classes with him?”

“i don’t think i do.. just, don’t worry about it, okay? i’ll throw away his number and we can put all of this behind us. here, i’ll do it right now.” you rip up the paper into a few pieces before tossing it in the garbage can. hopefully, you did it loud enough that shoko heard it through the phone. “i get that you’re worried for me. and i appreciate that, but i can handle myself.”

“just… no more mention of gojo anymore, okay? you’re right, y/n. let’s just put this all behind us.” shoko sighs, and you smile at that. problem solved. you threw away his number, and he’s most likely moved on to the next girl by now, so that was that. now, you just have to forget about satoru gojo.

all to never let yourself get hurt ever again.

it’s hard to forget about gojo.

not because of those dangerous blue eyes of his–getting anyone lost in them if they stare for too long. not because of his stupid silvery white hair, which makes him look like a mop, and sometimes like a paintbrush. not that stupid cocky grin of his, either…

...but because you’ve recently found out that he sits next to you for physics.

the revelation was truly disheartening. you thought you could avoid him for the rest of the year because as far as you knew, you shared no classes with him. however, you completely forgot about the fact that gojo never attends class in the first place, and you don’t even know what classes he’s in… because he’s never there. so finding out that the seat next to you in physics wasn’t just an empty seat, and it was gojo’s assigned one, was truly an experience.

“gojo.” the name alone makes your heart stop, and you drop your pen to look at the man your teacher was addressing. “finally choosing to attend class for once?”

speak of the devil.

there he was, in all his glory–the man you’d never thought you had to deal with ever again. the man who tried to butter you up with his corny sweet talk so that you would go home with him for the night. the man who persisted with talking to you, even though you were barely interested. the man, who, at the end of the night, insisted on writing down his number for you in case you changed your mind about him and gave him a chance.

you wanted to shrink into your seat and never resurface. 

“good morning, yaga!” he says rather loudly, with no regard to honorifics at all. a few giggles could be heard across the classroom–though geto suguru’s voice was prominent–satoru’s equally as infamous bestfriend. “and yeah! it’s surprising, isn’t it?”

what’s also surprising is how gojo took a seat next to you. you thought that there was a mistake, that your teacher would scold him for sitting somewhere he isn’t supposed to sit and relocate him elsewhere. however, yaga just grumbles and begins the lesson, leaving you helpless and unable to look at the man next to you.

you swear he’s burning holes at the back of your head.

pleasdon’tremembermeisweartogodpleasedon’trememberme-

“you’re that girl from the party, right?” he whispers, and you’ve never wanted to disappear so badly in your life. you slowly nod your head, turning to look at him, and he pouts. “y/n l/n. you never saved my number. hmph, i was looking forward to a text from you, too.”

“i’m surprised you even remember me, 'cause you were fucking wasted that night.” you twiddle your pencil, averting your gaze from the man. “and i never saved your number cause i threw the paper in the trash. it’s probably at a landfill somewhere, y’know.”

your words catch him off guard, and you laugh at how surprised satoru looks. it seems that’s definitely not an emotion he shows often. despite his initial reaction, satoru swears he could feel butterflies with the way your laugh sounds.

“not a common problem for a womanizer, huh?”

“what did you just call me?!-”

“y/n and gojo, do either of you have something to share with the class?” a dark blush of embarrassment covers your face, and somewhere in the back, you could hear geto snickering. gojo just smirks at yaga, seeming completely uanffected. “then i’d suggest you stay quiet the rest of this lesson. don’t make me separate you two.”

“i’d prefer that, actually…” gojo huffs at your comment, thinking of this as a lost opportunity if the two of you get separated. he does a once over at your appearance. you’re cute, but definitely not the party kind. you’re playing hard to get, and gojo finds it adorable–not a lot of girls go that way with him. however, gojo thinks you’re not just like any girl. there’s something different about you that intrigues him.

“did no one ever tell you that it’s rude to stare?”

“how could i not? you’re so cute.” 

“i thought you already learned from the party, gojo. i’m not interested in you.” 

the light blush coating your cheeks says otherwise. he smiles cheekily at the way you tried to hide your reaction to his words. you’re an enigma to gojo… and he’s drawn to you like a moth to a flame. he thinks he’s made his decision.

he’s gonna do whatever’s possible to get your number.

when the bell rings 30 minutes later, you shove your notebook into your bag, eager to finally leave the class that you had with that stupid paintbrush. that is, until he stops you with a question. “what class do you have next?”

he’s relentless. “why do you care?”

“i want to walk you to your next class,” he says, and smirks before saying his next words. “it doesn’t really matter if you tell me or not. i’ll just follow you anyways.”

you sigh, absolutely exasperated with him. he’s like a fly who keeps invading your personal space—always coming back no matter how many times you swat it away. he’s right, though. damn him for being stubborn. “i actually have this period free.”

“oh, sweet!” he chirps, walking with you out the door, making sure to greet geto before he leaves the classroom. “let’s go to the courtyard. i’ll buy you a drink from the vending machine-“

“i was gonna do that regardless if you were here or not.” you give him a look, and you can’t help but tug on your sleeves when you see people whisper to each other as you walk the halls with gojo. of course you’ve heard the rumors. the man next to you is the most popular guy on campus. girls glare daggers at you and the guys call his name, although he barely even acknowledges them. 

some common things that you’ve heard about gojo around the school are: “i heard he only talks to girls for sex,” “apparently his best friend geto is just as much of a player!” “i mean, who wouldn’t fuck a guy like gojo, though? he’s hot and loaded.” “that’s how he reels you in, though. he gets his hand in your pants and never calls you back again.” you know you should stay away from him, it’s common sense, but it’s hard to stay away from him when he’s the one who glues himself to your side. 

“well, now you’ll get a free drink and we’ll get to know each other! isn’t that great?” he smiles and you just grimace at his words. 

“i don’t need your money…”

“don’t care! can’t hear you!” he says, and you’ve seriously considered just making a run for it. at least you’ll lose him, and you’d finally be able to find peace for a bit. although, it would cause a scene, and gojo would probably end up finding you again somehow. 

“what can i do to get you to leave me alone?”

that piques his interest, even though he looks slightly hurt by your question. he thinks for a bit, and smirks. “i really do want to buy you something from the vending machine.. and i want you to spend your free period with me. i’ll leave you alone for the rest of the day if you do.”

“do you promise? like, actually?”

“mhm! pinky promise!” you feel like you’re talking to a prepubescent boy.

“then sure-“ you’re about to agree, but he cuts you off with one more condition.

“i also want your number.”

you feel like you’ve been cursed by a god, because having the most popular guy on campus be interested in you has got to be the most chaotic thing to ever happen in your life.

“what do you have me saved as?” 

the question comes from out of the blue, and you look up from the book you were completely absorbed in. you and satoru were at the school library, on a “study date” as he calls it, although it was more so just gojo inviting himself to wherever place you go, as per usual. this time, you have an exam to study for, and you explicitly told him not to bother you unless absolutely necessary.

you do have to say, though, he’s not annoying as you thought he was. he just nagged you way more the first day he sat next to you in physics so he could get your number. it’s been a few days since then, but still, you’d definitely be more efficient in your studies if you didn’t have him attached to your hip all the time.

“satoru, i told you not to bother me-“

“unless absolutely necessary. yeah, i heard you, and this question needs an absolutely necessary answer! contact names really say a lot about our relationship, y’know.”

“relationship? nobody ever said we were even friends-“

“don’t break my heart like that, babe. plus, you don’t call me gojo anymore! it’s satoru to you now,” his heart warms at that realization, and you scoff, especially at the pet name. “we are friends, unless you’d like to be something more...”

“if you say anything else i’m calling you by your government name. gojo satoru.” he looks especially wounded by that.

“ah! don’t do that, please. it feels like we’re a married couple and you’re really mad at me.” he cries and you can’t help but giggle at his words. you decide to entertain him a little bit, fishing through your pocket to find your phone. 

he almost passes out at what he sees on your screen.

“it’s just my number? you didn’t even save my contact?!-“

the shushes from your fellow students and the librarians aren’t even enough to calm gojo’s agony and despair. it also does nothing to stop your laughter, either.

from that day on, gojo’s contact was forcefully changed from his number to “satoru” (he initially added a heart, but you deleted it, much to his disappointment) and one of his many selfies from his stupid instagram account. how the hell can a college student even have thousands of followers?! you think. 

gojo just says that nobody can resist his shirtless post-workout selfies. you’re surprised that you didn’t slap him at his words.

you push him away.

everytime gojo buys your favorite drink, (it’s always on him, despite your genuine insistence in saying that you could pay for your drink just fine.) everytime he walks you to all of your classes each day, (he memorized your schedule just so he could do this) everytime he buys you your favorite foods on the rare instances that you let him take you out for lunch, (usually, this requires a lot of begging, and you mostly relent during class when you’re just exasperated and wanted to get some notes down.), and everytime he calls you by those stupid pet names of his, you think back to what the entire student body says about him, and you think back to your phone call with shoko, where she warns you to not associate with him so you don’t get hurt by anyone ever again, and you push him away.

you push him away even when you realize that if he just wanted you for sex, he would’ve stopped chasing after you when you didn’t text him after that night at the party.

and that thought alone scares you.

still, you’re not heartless. satoru’s been asking to take you out for a while, and you finally agreed to go today. he’s especially chipper about your agreement right now, walking with a slight pep in his step as he bit around his ice cream cone. 

the park boasts some beautiful scenery today, and little children are out and about. still, you underestimated the weather, and the cold uncomfortably nipped your arms as you internally cursed yourself out for wearing just a shirt. you crossed your arms as a subtle way to shield yourself from the cold.

“don’t play coy with me, y/n. are you cold?” satoru says with a cocky grin, and you huff at his question. surprisingly, he drops the teasing act and unzips his sweater, handing it to you. “here, take it.”

“satoru-“

“i’m not doing this to flirt or whatever you’re thinking right now. you’re shivering, and i’m just concerned for you, so please wear it.” he deadpans, and it’s the first time you’ve seen him be so… upfront? you kind of like it. it’s not him teasing you or him being flirty. it’s just him showing that he genuinely cares for you as a friend. you take the sweater with a nod and put it on, ignoring how your heart is thumping as you take in his signature smell. cedarwood with a little bit of musk. it’s not an overpowering scent, but it still envelopes your senses.

“nevermind. you look so cute with my hoodie on. i feel like we’re in a j-drama right now, y/n!”

you take back everything you just said.

a few minutes later, you two are near the kids playground when you decide to take a break from walking, sitting on a nearby bench with gojo. the chirping of the birds and the wind passing through the trees is quickly overpowered by loud crying. crying from the child right in front of you, in fact.

you’re about to ask him what’s wrong, but satoru beats you to it. he kneels in front of the kid, and coos, “hey, buddy. what’s your name, hm?”

he stops crying for a moment to look at gojo and shakily responds, “gumi-um, megumi fushiguro..” 

“megumi, huh.” he clicks his tongue for a moment. “why are you crying, megumi?”

“i-i don’t know where my dad is!” he cries, and satoru looks to you for help. you just shrug, unsure of what to do with the lost kid, until gojo’s face lights up, assumingly with a great idea.

“he’s most likely just around here somewhere. you can wait with us, and we’ll help you find him! say, do you want an ice cream to help you feel better, megumi?” the boy hesitantly nods, and satoru gives him a thumbs up as he takes him to the nearby ice cream stand. you’re watching this entire scene unfold, absolutely enamored with gojo for the first time. you didn’t think he had a natural talent with kids—but the way he’s making megumi laugh while he happily snacks on his ice cream says otherwise. an outsider could look at you three and assume that you’re just a happy family. 

you try to ignore how that makes you feel.

and as you wave goodbye to megumi once he eventually is reunited with his father again, (an intimidating man who gave you two an appreciative nod as he walked away with his son.) you realize something as you tug on the sleeves of your-satoru’s sweater. 

you’re in love with gojo satoru.

and fuck, that revelation scares you more than anything. the last time you had given your heart to a man, he had crushed it repeatedly until you decided that you would never let yourself be vulnerable like that ever again. 

and now, you're in love with your school’s notorious playboy—and it feels like you’re setting yourself up to be heartbroken again. you want disregard those rumors and shoko’s words so badly, but they still eat at the back of your mind even though the real gojo satoru is right in front of you, and he doesn’t match the characteristics of the gojo satoru in those rumors at all.

you also remember that he has one real best friend, geto suguru. you like to think that this is also what geto sees in gojo. the reason why he’s stuck around.

the reason why you want to stick around too.

you’re so busy in your head that you’ve just noticed gojo frantically waving his hand in your face. “earth to y/n? oh, good! i thought you had, like, a shock reaction from seeing megumi’s father. he looked a little scary, no?” 

“he looks like if a muscle came to life and started talking.” you whisper, and he laughs in agreement. burying your hands into the pockets of his hoodie, you smile. you don’t want to think about your current revelation with gojo right now. instead, you’ll stick with the present. and right now, you like the present.

you just don’t want to think about what this means for your future.

it’s the weekend, and you’re doing some work at the local cafe, gojo-free for once. only god knows what the man is doing at three pm in the afternoon on a saturday. not like you should be thinking about him right now, though. his presence alone has caused you to be behind on your studies, and you need to make sure you catch up.

you have to admit, you were a little unused to the silence. usually, the silence would be filled with gojo’s endless banter with you, as well as his terrible, corny jokes that are so stupid you can’t help but laugh. his seemingly never-ending presence was annoying at first, but now, you’re starting to yearn for his company.

it further fuels the pit of uncertainty in your stomach, and you hate it.

shaking your head with a sigh, you take another bite of your pastry and continue typing up the report on your laptop. the looming thought of this report’s impact on your grade and the need to pass this class helps you forget about satoru for a while. once again, you get lost in your academics.

the ring of the cafe bell breaks you from your trance. it was a natural impulse of yours to glance at everyone who entered the cafe, but once you did this time, you felt your heart drop down to your knees.

it was your ex. 

your ex boyfriend who destroyed the notion of love for you, because he made you feel it for a short time, only to throw it all into a pit of fire and leave you scrambling to find nothing but ashes. 

if you had to find the true roots as to why you’re so afraid to pursue a new relationship–you always find your ex in the center of it. and now, he’s right in front of you. you have to face him again when you refuse to shamefully admit that you’ve barely even healed from the emotional scars that he’d left behind. 

you feel as if an invisible hand has wrapped itself around your throat, blocking your airways and your ability to speak.

out of all the days satoru wasn’t here with you, it had to be this one.

“y/n? is that you, sweetheart?” you wanted to vomit at the way he said your name. he had no right to say it so sweetly, when all he’s ever left behind is venom. 

“i don’t want to talk to you.” you cringe at the way your voice cracks, and you avert your gaze from him.

“please, just hear me out for a minute, baby..” he coos, and you hate the way he talks to you as if you were a child. “i know i fucked up, and i can’t change our past… but i can change our future together. if you take me back, i’ll show you how much i’ve changed-”

you don’t know how many times you’ve heard that stupid line before.

“god, you sound like a broken record with how many times you’ve pulled that bullshit on me.” you spat, loud enough to draw commotion in the cafe. your ex has surprise written all over his face–most likely due to your non-compliance to his words. “what, do you say that shit to all your hoes?”

your ex looks around, shrinking a little when he sees all eyes are on him. “now, now, y/n, no need to be like that-”

“be like that… be like that?! you’re telling me to be civil when you’re the one coming in here wanting me back, spouting some bullshit saying that you’ve changed, when i told you to leave me alone already!” you scream, and you could feel the tears bubble up in your eyes. you look down, so you aren’t able to see how everyone’s staring at you with pity. god, you hate pity. it makes you feel weak and vulnerable. the two emotions you absolutely loathe. “i just want you to leave me alone, god. i hate you, why won’t you just-”

“you fucking bitch-” he makes a move to lunge at you, and you instinctively take a step back, pure fear enveloping your senses.

you never feel the impact, though, as you see your ex being restrained by the cafe worker.

you remember him. the man who took your order earlier. he was an older man with a warm smile on his face, although you noticed how his cheekbones were slightly sunken, and he looked a little overworked. you jokingly quipped earlier that he should get some sleep before thanking him for making your order. he just replied, i get that quite a lot.

the size difference between your ex and the man is enough to discourage him from fighting back. he makes quick work your ex, dragging him out the door while he hysterically screams profanities to you on the way out. you assumed the worker threatened to call the police, because your ex scrambled up from the ground and ran away. you hoped this was the last time you would ever see him again.

“are you okay, ma’am? he didn’t hurt you, did he?”

you didn’t even realize that the worker was back inside the cafe. everyone was gradually returning to their own businesses, with the eerie silence being replaced by casual chatter once more. you also didn’t realize how much your hands were shaking, and you huff out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. “y-yeah, i’m alright, and he didn’t hit me. i just… need a minute,”

you decide that you aren’t gonna get anymore work done like this, so you pack your laptop into your bag and slump onto the seat with a sigh. you bury your face into your hands. “is it a long story?”

“oh, don’t even get me started.”

he laughs at that, and you ease up a little. “i told him i’d call the police if i ever see him around here again.”

“that’s good to hear. though i’d prefer if i never see him in my life ever again.”

he hums at your words, and he turns to look out the window. “it’s getting dark out. do you want me to call you a cab?”

“no need, i’ll call my boyf–my friend. i’ll call my friend. he’ll uh, pick me up.” you’re still so shaken up you barely even register what you said to him. your eyes are frantic as you turn your phone on and look for gojo’s name in your contacts. you don’t know why you want him to pick you up out of everybody. you could ask utahime or shoko right now, but you just wanted nothing more but to see gojo.

the bell rings again, and you flinch at the sound. thankfully, it was just another customer. the worker sighs. “well, these orders aren’t going to be done themselves. just wave me over if there are any other problems, okay?” 

you nod absentmindedly, and he turns to leave, but you stop him. “wait, sir, what’s your name?”

“kento nanami.”

“thank you so much, nanami. i appreciate it.” 

“i’m just doing my job.”

“your job is restraining crazy exes of college girls and kicking them out?”

“‘it comes with the job description.” he teases, and you laugh lightheartedly. “and your name is?”

“y/n l/n.”

“anytime, miss l/n. again, just please… call me over if anything happens.”

“will do…” you say, pressing the “call” button on gojo’s contact. the anxiety is hitting you again, and you take a shaky inhale. you’re surprised at how he picks up almost instantly. “hey… satoru? yeah, can you come pick me up, please? i know i don’t normally ask you to do something like this but-”

“did something happen?”

“a lot happened, actually… i’ll text you the address. please, just come soon.”

“of course, y/n.” you could already hear him running out the door, hearing the roar of his car engine coming to life. “i’ll be there as soon as possible.”

he gets to the cafe in five.

you wave goodbye to nanami, thanking him once more as you get in the passenger seat of gojo’s car. 

it’s not your first time inside here, but you still can’t help but admire how… expensive everything looks. or maybe you’re just looking around because you’re stalling, and you have no idea where to begin with satoru. 

however, you notice that he’s not asking you what happened, and he’s not forcing you to explain anything to him. instead, he switches the gear shift out of parking and says, “do you want me to take you home?”

your eyes widen at his words, and you shake your head no profusely. the last thing you want to be is home alone right now, mainly because your ex knows where you live. you know he most likely won’t go that far with you, especially since nanami knocked some sense into him… but the possibilities still scare you. you take a deep breath before saying your next words.

“...can you take me to your house? i-i’m sorry for asking, i just don’t want to be alone right now cause i’m terrified and-” 

“y-yeah. i’ll take you to my house.” he says, and you’ve never seen him so nervous in your life. it almost makes you laugh.

“i’ll explain everything later. i just… wanna be somewhere safe first.” somewhere safe. you find his house as a safe place. gojo doesn’t know how to react. his heart is thumping wildly out of his chest, but he makes sure to put your own comfort before his feelings.

“you don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to.” he says, maintaining his cool by keeping his eyes on the road, one hand on the wheel and the other on the gear shift.

“but i want to, satoru…” you say. you can’t believe you’re doing this again. you’re crossing so many territories that you were so afraid to cross because of your ex. now, you think you aren’t that afraid anymore. not if you have satoru by your side. 

you place one of your cold hands on the gear stick, interlocking it with his. is he… shaking? “thank you for this.”

still. there are so many things you can’t say to him yet. you don’t know when you’ll be able to… or if you’ll ever be able to.

i love you. i love you but i’m too afraid to say it. i just hope that you’ll be able to wait for me.

“god, you’re killin’ me here, y/n.” 

that pit of uncertainty in your stomach has grown so large you feel it's about to consume you whole. you don’t think you mind much, though.

the two of you are lounging at his couch after satoru insisted on telling you to make yourself at home. there’s a movie playing, with neither of you paying attention at all, takeout on the coffee table, two glasses and a bottle of wine after gojo didn’t know what drinks to serve, and freaked out by pulling the first expensive drink out from his parents’ alcohol closet. has he never properly invited someone to his home before?

“so in short, you had a crazy ex who saw you at the coffee shop… and he was begging for you to take him back, and when you went off on him he called you a bitch and tried to hit you…” he recalls, a huge grimace on his face. “tch. the cafe worker shouldn’t have let him go like that.”

“i’m sure he learned not to mess with me after getting humiliated in public.. and nanami did more than enough for me.” you retorted, and he gave you a sour look. 

“oh, so you know the worker’s name now?” he says, and you could feel the tension build up in the air. oh. so he wants to do this with you? “what, is he your knight in shining armor?”

“he looks like he’s in his late thirties, satoru. i’m not into older guys,” you roll your eyes at his absurd questions and add, “what’s it to you anyway?”

“what’s it to me, y/n?” he repeats your words, and you could feel an argument coming, like you already didn’t have an exhaustive one with your ex. “you know how i feel about you-“

“what the fuck is that supposed to mean?” your voice is getting louder, all to hide your fear behind the implication of his words. you distance yourself from him on the couch.. much like how you distance yourself from letting satoru get too close to how you truly feel. “we’re not even together, satoru. you don’t get to control the guys that i talk to- hell, have you even seen yourself?”

you’re rambling, and all you want to do is shut up, but you can’t bring yourself to. “i’ve heard what our school says about you. y-you’re a playboy, right? and you only ever talk to girls because you wanna fuck them. i’m not stupid, satoru. i’m not different from any of them, right? you only chase after me because i’m playing hard to get and that pisses you off-“

“what… what are you even saying, y/n?” he asks, and it stops your rambling for a moment. you don’t know what you’re saying. you’re pouring out all the reasons why you’ve tried to push him away, the reasons why you were so afraid to give your heart to him. but now that you say them out loud, they sound outright stupid. 

“i started coming to class just to talk to you, i memorized your schedule just so i can walk you to class every morning. i buy you all your favorite food and drinks… i had to memorize your favorites too, by the way. and i have shit memory.” he’s screaming at this point, and you’ve never had satoru scream at you. there are unshed tears in his eyes, and it’s all overwhelming to watch this unfold. “and when you called me, i drove as fast as i could to you because you never call like that and i was fuckin’ worried!”

“so let me ask you a question, y/n… would i do all these things for you just because i want you in my bed?! i’d do anything for you, and you know that!” he’s crying. the gojo satoru is crying, and it’s all for a girl. if you told this to someone in your school, they’d call you a shit-faced liar. gojo satoru doesn’t cry for a girl. he makes them cry.

“i’m sorry for being skeptical, satoru! i just can’t help it when there’s so many rumors about you wanting to fuck girls just for the shit of it – and i’m conflicted on whether or not i should believe them because i want you so bad and i’m scared you’ll end up just breaking my heart and i don’t want that to happen again-”

he cuts you off. “you… what?”

you’re confused at why he looks so surprised, but then you backtrack on your words and you gasp. fuck. why did i say that? you cover your mouth and look away from him, refusing to meet his eyes.

those stupid blue eyes that you know you can’t get enough of.

“y/n… can you please say that again? i don’t want to do anything if i didn’t hear you right.” his voice is soft now, and you swear that you’re dreaming. this isn’t real. right? i’m gonna wake up soon. you dig your nails into the palms of your hands, leaving half-moon marks in their wake. it doesn’t work, and you don’t wake up, and you know you have to accept the fact that this is very real and it’s happening.

this is the worst leap of faith you think you’ve ever had to take in your life.

“i want you so fucking bad, satoru. and i’m realizing that you’re not just the stereotypical rich playboy that everyone talks about on campus—you’re a really great guy, and i guess i’m just scared to face that-” you don’t even realize that satoru’s got you cornered on the couch, and you can’t finish your words as he slots his lips against yours. hard. it’s the most passionate kiss you think you’ve ever had in your life, and it’s got your breath taken away in seconds. holy shit.

you quietly moan against his lips as you kiss back, cupping his face with your hands and wiping his tears away. you wish this moment would last forever, but you pull away so you can breathe. you meet gojo’s eyes, and they’re clouded with lust and desire, but you could tell he’s still a little uncertain. “we’ll talk later… just take me to the bedroom already,”

gojo doesn’t need another confirmation from you, and he lifts you up to carry you to his bedroom, practically tripping on his feet the way there.

a few hours later and a noise complaint from the neighbors, it’s safe to say that gojo satoru was the best one you’ve ever had.

“god, i’m never letting you go, baby.”

he’s tracing hearts onto your bare back. it’s littered with bruises and red scratch marks just from a few minutes ago, but you’ve never felt better in your life. you stare at the man who invited himself into your life just from an encounter at a party, and you thank your lucky stars that you agreed to go with utahime that night. “is something wrong? you’re starin’ again.”

“i’m sorry it took me so long to trust you. i’ve just been scared to open up my heart again, especially after him.” you don’t have to name “him” for satoru to understand. 

“i’m sorry too. i just got angry about the rumors and i also disregarded the fact that you’re scared to love again after your ex did all of that shit and-” he pauses, and sighs. “sorry. i’m rambling again.” 

he pulls you into another kiss, and this time, it’s sweeter, lighter, and full of love. “i’m going to show you what it looks like to really be loved, because it’s definitely not the shitty picture that your ex painted in your head. there’s way more to it than that.”

“i love you, y/n.”

“thank you, toru.” you whisper. maybe, one day, you’ll be able to find the courage to say it back. and it’s okay, because gojo is willing to wait an eternity for you. 

he’ll wait an eternity for you to teach you how to love again.

“look at how beautiful you are…” gojo says, appearing out of nowhere as he wraps an arm around your waist. you yelp, staring at your boyfriend through the mirror. he’s wearing a classic black tuxedo, with no doubt it being very expensive. it compliments the glimmering rolex on his wrist, and the thoughts running through your head about him and his outfit sets fire to your stomach.

“look at yourself first, toru… god, we should just stay home,” you tease, turning around to pull him into a deep kiss. it’s a friday, and gojo’s taking you out to attend geto’s party tonight. the two of you are going for several reasons. he wants to introduce you to his bestfriend, since you realized that you’ve never actually formally met geto before. it’ll also be your first formal “couple appearance”, as if gojo being attached to your side all the time doesn’t say enough about the two of you already. 

gojo pulls away, which surprises you. you pout at the expression on his face. “as much as i want to, suguru’s been bugging about you all week. i really do think it’s time for you to meet him,”

“hmph. alright.” 

“i’m tearing that dress off of you the second we get home, though.”

“satoru!”

“what?! not my fault my girl looks so damn hot all the time!”

this night is going amazing.

when satoru walks with you through the front doors, arm wrapped around your waist and the dress you picked out for tonight glimmering, you feel a little shy. the guys all whistle at the two of you, and the girls whisper amongst each other, but you and gojo don’t care. in his eyes, you’re the only girl he sees. the only girl worth being with here. 

“wanna go get drinks?” he asks you, cerulean eyes showing underneath his sunglasses. you nod, walking to the kitchen with him. you’re getting severe deja vu… you can’t believe you met gojo at the last party you were at. and now you’re at another party, with gojo as your date. you scan the crowd for utahime or shoko, wondering what you would say to them if they saw you with the man they specifically told you not to mess with.

it’s alright, though. shoko was wrong about those rumors, and gojo’s proving it to you.

“satoru!” the playful voice greets your boyfriend, and you turn to see geto suguru. you’ve seen him around campus, and he sits somewhere in the back of your chem class. you haven’t really had the opportunity to talk to him, though… and he looks a little intimidating.

“you must be y/n,” he says, offering you a freshly opened smirnoff from the drinks on the countertop. you thank him and grab the drink, taking a swig.

“yup! my lovely girlfriend,” gojo lets go of his arm around your waist to grab a drink. 

“you probably don’t know this, but i’ve been his wingman.” he smiles at gojo, who’s pouting, like he’s preparing himself for what suguru is about to say. “he’s batshit crazy for you, its insane.”

“oh? do tell.”

“when the two of you got together, he left me a voicemail at like… four in the morning? anyway, he was screaming about how he was the happiest guy in the world… or something.”

“that’s because i was!” you’re laughing at how unashamed satoru is about this.

“yeah, yeah, whatever.” geto clicks his tongue, pulling out his phone. “and he’s reposted you on insta to like, every drake song-”

“alright, me and y/n are gonna go dance.” he interrupts suguru, and drags you away from his best friend with a yelp. “nice talkin’ to you, suguru!”

“hey, i wanted to know more!-”

“shh, you don’t need to know about all of that.” the two of you are in the living room, in the midst of all the bodies dancing and grinding against each other. he pulls you close to him, and you feel his hot breath against your neck. “you look so beautiful tonight, y/n.”

“same for you, handsome. let’s dance, shall we?” you wrap your arms around him and just sway to the beat. you’ve never been much of a dancer, but everything feels natural as long as gojo’s with you. 

suddenly, the music changes, and one dance starts playing. you two look at each other, and you both burst out laughing at the same time. “have you reposted me to this song?”

“duh. it’s a classic.”

“can’t disagree with that.” you say, finding yourself grinding against satoru while wizkid’s part plays in the background. it feels like such a perfect night–you’re pulling satoru into a deep kiss, and he shoves his tongue down your throat while he’s leading you to a nearby couch. you’re seated on his lap, mimicking practically every couple in this party tonight. 

suddenly, you pull away, and you whisper, “i need to use the bathroom.” 

satoru smirks at your words, thinking that it’s a hint for something else, and you give him a sour face. “want me to join you-”

you hit his chest playfully. “that’s not code for anything, you perv. i actually need to piss.” 

he’s pouting at your words, but he lets you off his lap anyway, and holds your drink for the time being. “it’s at the second door in the hall to your right. be quick, please.”

“no duh. i’ve got a cute date to come back to,” you say, walking away and traversing all of the bodies that smell like sweat and alcohol. you’re a little unused to this environment, but it’s alright. you fix up your makeup in the bathroom and freshen up a little, walking back to the living room to find satoru again. 

you wish you never did.

you were gone for four minutes. five minutes max. you come back to satoru, and your breath hitches at the sight.

on his lap was a random chick that looked like every other girl at this party. she was practically naked, since her outfit didn’t do much to cover her skin at all.

fuck.

you remember the first time you saw gojo at the last party you went to. the sight wasn’t that different compared to the one now. there were girls all over him, all fighting for his attention. and yet, it seemed that night, his attention was focused solely on you.

what bullshit that was.

your eyes are blurry, and the music is muffled in your ears. white noise fills your senses, and all you want to do right now is run.

so you do.

you run, not caring if gojo saw you at all or not. you run out of the party, eternally grateful that you didn’t pick out heels for tonight and settled for much simpler shoes. you run, despite the fact that you drew geto’s attention. you were already out the door before he could ask what was wrong. you run, just wanting to get away from everyone and everything. you run with no particular destination in mind. you stop running when you almost get run over on a red light, the car honking at you–screaming profanities as it drives by. it breaks you from your trance, and you sit on the curb of the sidewalk, letting all of your tears out on what was supposed to be a perfect night.

of course gojo didn’t think that you were different. you were just like every other girl to him.

stupid. stupid. stupid. you’ve never felt so stupid in your life.

when geto sees you running out the door with unshed tears in your eyes, he immediately panics. what the hell happened?

he goes through every room of the house, trying to find gojo, when he hears a bunch of commotion in the living room. he runs there, pushing past everyone, only to find a total disaster inside.

he sees gojo screaming at a girl dressed like a stripper, who was on the ground with tears in her eyes. satoru looks like he’s about to pop a blood vessel with how pissed he looks. there’s a crowd forming at this point, and geto knows he needs to intervene, so he drags his bestfriend away, who looks so distraught that geto could just wonder what the fuck happened.

they’re outside now, and its significantly a lot more quiet out here compared to all of the chaos inside. all the noise is coming from gojo—who won’t stop crying, and geto has no idea what to do or where to even begin. “fuck!”

“dude, what the fuck happened!?” satoru looks like he’s feeling every emotion at once. he looks pissed, pissed enough to punch a wall, and geto’s a little afraid that gojo might actually do that–or worst-case scenario, punch him. he’s crying, and geto hasn’t seen gojo cry ever since he fell off a swing in pre-k, so what happened must be really fucking serious.

“i don’t KNOW what happened, goddamnit! y/n went to use the bathroom and some slu- some girl came up to me and threw herself on my fucking lap! i was gonna tell her to fuck off but y/n saw before i was able to and now she’s gone and she probably thinks that i’m just some cheater when i’ve worked so hard to get her to trust me and-FUCK!”

he stops, trying to calm down a little, and gojo takes the shakiest breath he thinks he’s ever taken in his life. the red in his vision starts to fade, but he still feels helpless. “i just don’t know what to fucking do, suguru.” 

“i just saw y/n run out of my house a few minutes ago.” he says with a grimace, and he’s trying to figure out what to tell his bestfriend. “i’ve never seen you like this over a girl before. holy shit, you really love her, do you?”

geto thinks that gojo’s bloodshot eyes, the brutal names that he called that girl at the party, and the tears he’s shed for you are already an answer.

“this is your last chance to prove it to her, satoru.” geto fumbles through his pockets and hands him the keys to his challenger. gojo snatches them, hearing the car engine rumbling itself to life. the white-haired man thanks his best friend as he steps into the drivers’ side, with geto reassuring him, ‘ill deal with the chaos inside, you go ahead and explain yourself to your girlfriend’.

gojo swears that he’s never driven so fast in his whole life.

part 2 :)

[olderthannetfic]

I always see people who have never been antis, talking about/questioning how some antis even ARE antis when you look at their taste in media - ie the ever famous joke of "Hannigram is #problematique" "but it's a show where he eats people" or whatever.

I thought I'd weigh in as someone who could, hypothetically, be called an ex-anti (which, thankfully, nothing ever really came out of it - it was just very 2014 keyboardwarrior-esque behavior of me being a chronically online young adult who would share posts in a group chat making fun of certain shippers, or reblog posts about how 50shades is The Most Problematic Media Ever to exist -- basically I was an anti with anti-lines of thoughts, but i never, like, a ran a Shipping Discourse Blog or whatever)

For me, personally, it was a few different things. I can now see how it's incredibly hypocritical that teenaged me shipped Light/L, while still thinking that Dramione was Bad And Abusive. It ultimately boiled down to a) being pretentious, and b) just not understanding media or what proshippers REALLY believed, with a side of c) not realizing that nuance exists. like i was pretty late to join tumblr, I think I immigrated here during PEAK "yourfaveisproblematic" era which definitely did have an impact on my opinions and my tastes.

to elaborate, a.) being pretentious. i mean this one just kinda goes without saying. "I engage in media in a way more intellectual way than you do, don't you know that? You're a filthy and disgusting person who writes Snape/Hermione because you're an actually disgusting pedophile IRL who would probably date your own student that you're abusing if you could. Meanwhile, I'm a very smart, good, and pure person. When I read Uncle Vernon/Harry, I'm doing it in a G-d honoring whump way that clearly condemns abuse, incest, and rape. Unlike YOU who only writes harmful stuff as a way to get people off :/"

(as an aside, i think this line of thinking will ALWAYS be present in fandom and popculture in some way, sadly. ie the recent trend of people hating on booktok bc the books are 'trashy' and how these porn addicts should read real classic literature instead.)

as for b.), not understanding media - i cannot emphasize enough that i was GENUINELY stupid and disconnected enough to think that proshippers REALLY WERE pro-All Of The Degenerate Dead Doves That They Wrote.

why did i feel this way? why did i understand that Lolita clearly isnt pro-pedophilia, but for some reason i thought that someone shipping weecest was? well, first of all, i think that fanfiction is (generally) seen as Less Serious than classic literature, and fandom is a fun place, so i guess i somehow thought that every fanfic/fanartist who wrote Problematic Things, especially Problematic Things that they portrayed as Sexy, really DID enjoy the thought of that Actually Happening To Real People.

and i think THIS is the bulk of why antis ARE antis. i'm not calling them all stupid - i do think BEING an anti is stupid, but at the same time, there are people who are truly smart and good-intended people who just have some really off color opinions about, like, homestuck ships or whatever. Lawlight is okay because notebooks that kill people don't exist so it's IMPOSSIBLE for the Harmful Aspects of Light/L to be romanticized! but schoolyard prejudiced bullies DO exist and are a REAL problem so Drarry is BAD (*truly completely unaware of the fact that there's 'realistic' aspects of the Light/L dynamic and 'unrealistic' aspects of Drarry - such as, for example, Hogwarts arguably being even MORE of a fantasy setting than DN is.*) I know that media literacy is the hot buzzword of the year to throw around in 2024, but, like, i really did not have media literacy.

as for c.), not realizing nuance exists - ok "nuance" might not be the best word here, but i dont know how else to describe it. like, each time ive typed the word "problematic" out in this ask, i've done so in a very tongue in cheek/ironic/retroactive way, but, like, those posts about how Everything Is Problematic, Including Your Fave ARE true. and i didn't like the fact that my favorite media or favorite person might've Made A Mistake! i need to Talk About Its Issues Because I'm So Betrayed That My Dear Sweet Comfort Media Would Do This To Me. I Need To Prove I Clearly Condemn It.

like, i legit morally could not justify reblogging a twilight post without adding in the tags '#this is my guilty pleasure it sucks that the books were so racist though' or whatever. Most people were lucky enough to avoid that line of thinking, but there was an actual group of people who felt a genuine need to virtue signal all the time, partly bc, hey, they WERE passionate about talking abt #issues in media, but also bc of a subconscious fear of If You Reblog A Singular Piece Of Hetalia Fanart, You're Literally A Nazi And Will Get A Callout Post Written About You.

and during all of this i was at the tail end of my high school experience (yes i know im younger than most of your audience, ha). i was going through A Lot emotionally, going through a lot of life changes, and lived in a very . . . interesting household/place where i couldn't do ACTUAL good in the world that i was passionate about. so to make up for the fact that i was genuinely in no place to do legit activism, clearly i had to save the gay community by arguing about johnlock queerbaiting or whatever.

^ and honestly i do think that is the position of most antis. theyre isolated and cant seem to do Enough in the Real Scary World so they have to resort to talking about how bad of a person someone is for "shipping abuse", bc theyre not in a situation where they could, for example, ACTUALLY fight the good fight to end abuse or raise awareness for it.

There was way more to it and way more that I could say, if I wanted to, but this post is long enough as it is and probably doesn't make much sense.

I feel bad for antis, honestly, or at least the ones who are antis in the way I used to be.

--

Oh yes, passionate young fools who think they can at least fix the internet if not their lives make up most of the cannon fodder. Some of the ringleaders are just mini dictators and wannabe cult leaders, but most anti-leaning types are just traumatized or clueless, even a lot of the ones who do serious damage and don't just mock shit in private with their friends.

[gaspshichat]

hi chat. pearl made me cry at 9:30 in the morning so y'all know what time is it. warning there will be swears [i say the f word ☹️] bc i haven't slept but i'm somehow not sick rn which. hasn't happened in weeks

[and a quick health update: pretty sure i have narrowed down what's making me sick to three possible things. i'm hopefully seeing my doctor soon bc the refill on my meds expires in june. we're so close and i haven't been able to breathe]

.

.

.

OH MY GOD. Y'ALL. IF YOU'RE FOLLOWING ME AND SOMEHOW AREN'T A PEARL FAN. HOW ???? GO. GO BE A PEARL FAN. IT'S A THREAT

pearl is funny and kind and caring. there is a reason i gave her 10k bits the other day. she deserves the entire world and more. i don't know what the world did to her that made her so kind

i'm not the only one who has a message though !! here are a few messages from people but i've seen so many in reblogs and tweets and whatnot

.

from my lovely partner tay aka twitter user PandoraRxse: I can’t catch streams very often but your videos always make me smile and I always look forward to a new upload. Keep doing what you’re doing, you’re amazing Pearl

from lovely twitter user SKYBL1NGS: shes like genuinely super funny and has great content that everyone can get into and shes really pretty and i loce pearlecentmoon

from a lovely anonymous twitter user: she is genuinly such an amazing artist, both in minecraft and in real life, all of her art is so lively in a way that i'm not sure how to describe best. also she is such a kind human being :))

from lovely tumblr user sapphicwhimsy: pearl is such a lovely and sweet person. shes SO kind to everyone in chat, new or old, and creates such a lovely environment to hang around in. her streams are the only ones i can sit through fully, and she has SUCH a lovely voice! i could listen to her read the dictionary, because im sure she would make it interesting. she has such a way to make everything interesting! even things like sitting still for thirty minutes can be something interesting in a pearl stream, because shes always got such amazing things to say. shes absolutely beautiful, inside and out, with a kind soul that matches her through and through. the fact that she always tries to read everyone out personally, and tries to pronounce their names correctly - and accepts corrections wholeheartedly - is so nice. and shes so wonderfully accepting to all of her community, and always has well wishes for everyone. shes truly a very wonderful and accepting person, who deserves the world! honestly the sweetest person ive ever came across.

.

anyway onto the next part of why i made this post

HOW THE FUCK IS SHE SO PRETTY. WHAT. IT'S GENUINELY UNFAIR. SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE COULD BE A GODDAMN SCULPTURE

LIKE COME ON. I WISH I COULD DRAW SO I COULD DRAW HER. SHE'S BEAUTIFUL. WHAT THE HELL. LOOK AT HER

featuring other GORGEOUS women. my god. i am so

anyway :)) it took me an hour and a half to write this bc i kept getting distracted. in short. pearl is so amazing and wonderful. it's weird how she remembers things about me and actually cares ???

also. SHE PRONOUNCED MY NAME CORRECTLY ???? I'VE HEARD SUCH TERRIBLE PRONUNCIATIONS BUT PEARL. SHE SAID IT RIGHR FIRST TRY. WHAT. i kind of want to hear how karn would attempt to pronounce it

[bc yes. i'm okay with anyone, including streamers, calling me vyren. you know me better than my dad does. it's okay to call me vy, vyren, gasp, or gasps]

sleepy brain wrote this post and i want to say so much more but i can't. i had a better message when i did my 10k bits message but that thing is long gone. the only way pearl knows about those bits is if she sees this

and to her community: i love y'all. y'all are lovely. thanks for helping make my shitty life a little brighter. the world may not be kind to me, but y'all are. thank y'all for that. y'all are so lovely

pearl, if you see this, sending all the love to you and your three cats. and yes. karn is the third cat

[skitskatdacat63]

Hiii CATIE!!!!! HIII

Im pretty pretty sure people have already asked BUT HOW WAS ATTENDING THE US GP LIVE!!!! WAS???? TELL ME!! DO YOU HAVE PICS??? I know I know im late.

I ALSO HOPE YOU GOT HOME SAFE AND SOUND AND THAT YOU ARE RESTING NOW+!!!(I saw the chaos you went through im deeply sorry for you :( )

ANYWAYS HOW WAS THE RACE? HOW WAS EXPERIENCING STROLLONSO LIVE?????? AND omg did you get pics of drivers??? :00

You must must share pleaseeeeee.wax.poet

OH MY GOD ELLE SORRY THIS IS SO LATE!!! IT WAS VERY COOL!!!!! VERY SURREAL!!!!!! I've taken a week to answer this but uhhhh yes I am in fact home now 🥰 I got home at like 1 am which was cool....

First of all I have to mention this! I was fighting for my life walking thru the Austin airport(from sleep deprivation), and I had my Fernando hat on my backpack, right? Some girl comes up to me and asks if I'm going to the GP, I say yes. SHE GAVE ME A FRIENDSHIP BRACELET, I COULD'VE SOBBED 🥹 It says on it "wtf is a km", I'm still so happy

COTA was the first race I ever watched, so to be actually at that track and watch a race live there was extremely surreal! Very hot though my god 😵‍💫 I think last year it was pretty hot, right? And my brother kept sending me the temp and it was pretty okay, and then of fucking course the temp leaps up to 89-97°(31-36° Celsius btw) right in time for the gp....so that was nice(I say as I burn in the sun like a vampire. But don't worry I didn't even really tan at all 😭 I always wore a hat and a lot of sunscreen. And meanwhile my brother was literally a lobster)

(This is a long post):

So unfortunately I missed the drivers parade because my brother and I were dying on Saturday night and his friends wanted to go first thing in the morning, and we're like "we will go later actually 😊" and missed it entirely 😭😭😭 but his friends took pics of Mclaren and Aston for me!!!!! But unfortunately I havent gotten them still, so I'll have to reblog this later with those! I took a lot of pictures of the cars I took from behind the fence, which I think I've posted some of? Lmk if anyone wants those!! They're very random, I just thought it was very surreal to see the cars flying past, so I took a million.

The coolest part was definitely running on track after the race was over!!! Soooooo surreal, and so I'm only gonna post pics rn from Sunday(bcs pic limit on phone) and also I think everything else kinda pales in comparison(but of course lmk if there's anything you're interested in seeing 🤭)

Okay and did I see any drivers...? ONLY ONE BUT AAAAHHHH I DID SEE LANDO!!! Not even one of my favs but it was soooooo surreal to see him, even from afar. As you can see above, everyone standing on the fences was blocking the view 🙄, but during the podium, I was focusing my camera btwn their legs and got literally one second of Lando 😭 I think its a pretty aesthetic clip, so I gifed it!!

It was so funny, I went to the gp with my brother and friends, so all these older guys yeah. And I was showing this off to them on the ride home, and his one friend was praising me so much for it 😭😭 like: "oh my god!!!! You could put this in an edit !!! This is so sick!!!!"

Oh one other thing!!! I think I've mentioned it before but my god, my favorite f1 podiums are always the ones with confetti, right?? AND THERE WAS CONFETTI AT THIS RACE!!!

LOOK AT HOW PRETTYYYYY!!!! And so anyways, I picked up so much confetti off the ground and now it lives forever in my phone case 🥰🥰🥰 I have no other room for pics on this post(for now) but oh my godddddddddd most of the confetti were just rectangles BUT THERE WAS ALSO ONES SHAPED LIKE TEXAS!!! SO COOL!!!!! And I also picked up a bunch of tire marbles off the ground!!! And a piece of plastic that probably came off some car. It was so funny when all of us were just scrounging off the ground. My bro's one friend somehow found a piece of carbon fiber, and we're all like "how can I kill him in his sleep and steal this from him..." But no the highlight actually of that process was watching my brother sprint to the podium, but stopping and grabbing a bunch of gravel first to shove in his pocket 😭😭😭

The other two days were fun as well, but also a lot of just dying in the heat and drinking a fuckton of red bull, so there's not too much specifically to say! I really liked hearing the cars. I think if you wanna know what's actually going on in a race, watching from home is better, but hearing the cars go by and seeing them is just so fucking sick. It was so funny to see grown men be like "I think I'm going to cry hearing these cars." I was really flexing on them with "uhhh yeah I've already been to a gp already 🙄🙄"

Anyways I ended the day by breaking bank by buying my dad and myself Fernando shirts because he is of course Fernando's biggest fan 🥰🥰 and I bought the most delicious overpriced lemonade, which I only drank half of bcs my brother proceeded to accidentally elbow it out of my hand....

OH WAIT ONE MORE DETAIL LOL. On Friday, my brother and his friend were waiting in line for smth and I was talking to them outside of the barrier. I look down, hmm theres a red cap abandoned on the ground, I pick it up, it is in fact a Ferrari hat. And that is how my brother acquired a $40+ dollar hat for free. Lucky bastard....I was the who found it!

[hueynomure]

WIP Reblog Game

Thank you @coffeebanana for the tag! I'm not one for very long fics and/or starting posting plotty stuff if I don't already have most of the fic written out (too high of a chance of having to correct/retcon shit) so I'm adding fics that only live in my WIP folder lol

List the titles your top five priorities for WIP updates (link your fics for new readers!)

An upcoming scene, event, or detail in each fic that you’re looking forward to writing

Bonus: make a poll for your followers to vote on which top 5 WIP they are most excited to see an update on!

Then tag 10 writer friends!

WIP TITLES

Are Hexagon Square Dances a Thing?: Born as a LoveyWeek entry, I got stuck on the very last chapter fml

Uncovering, Unraveling (working title): Imagine Marinette had accidentally outed her Loveybug identity (as in Woven In) to Cat Walker in the (Un)Suited plotline... basically Farewell Gifts but make it smut lol

The Merits of Bagging a Hero (working title): Adrien and Marinette are invited at Alya's and Nino's place for their usual wine&dine night. Everything is going fine, Mari being flustered and Adrien being oblivious as usual - until Alya brings out the topic of hero-specific free passes and the two become inexplicably passionate about who would be the best hero lay between Ladybug and Chat Noir...

Poker Face: Loveybug AU, Cat Walker angst

Heart(s) on Her Sleeve: Companion piece for Poker Face, Loveybug's side of the angst

UPCOMING

Tbqh the biggest motivation for getting this done is getting it over with, which is probably why I've been having so much trouble tackling it lol. I'll just say that I initially intended it to end with platonic Mariwalker buuuuut there may be some smooching hehe

Turns out I'm a SUCKER for scenarios where Cat Walker learns Marinette is Loveybug lol I will have a lot of fun writing the surprise conversation (won't go too much into details bc spoilers) they'll have about his feelings... with Adrien still inside Marinette, both of them deliberately avoiding addressing the fact or doing anything at all abt it lol

This will be 200% crack and I will have SO MUCH FUN writing the most batshit stuff I can come up with. Alya, ever the shit-stirrer, figures out Adrien is Chat Noir halfway through the conversation and spends the rest of the fic basically eating popcorn and fanning that trashfire of a debate lol

Chat Noir is a necessary outlet for Adrien. When Cat Walker has to pick up Loveybug's slack, his energies and enthusiasm are slowly but surely drain until the only reason he dons his mask, the only reason he gets out of bed, is Loveybug's unrestrained and unconditional affection. This can't last - and yet, it's his duty to carry the weight and not let anything show. I'm gonna enjoy writing the pressure building >:3c

There's one phrase to describe Loveybug!Marinette: bracing for punishment. She's too raw with all the Loveybug intensity, she just CAN'T turn into Ladybug, so she just keeps pouring her heart out knowing that at some point, somehow, she will be horrifically punished for it. Just like with Kim. Just like every time she tried to confess to Adrien. But as a hero, the consequences of her mistakes could be... she doesn't want to think about it. She keeps her head low and prepares for the worst, dreading and longing the moment when she'll be forced to wear Loveybug's lovestruck smile again.

Anyone I would have thought to tag Kayla has already tagged, with the excellent exception of @asukiess, so I won't be tagging anybody else! Feel free to join in the fun and consider this a soft tag if you (yes YOU reading this rn) want to tho :3

[crows-of-buckets]

finally deciding to make an about me post yippee yay!!

Hi my name is Crow! Most of what I reblog is fandom stuff, and I jump between fandoms quite frequently <//3 I have a few that I tend to come back to regularly however (Somehow I manage to have a dragon age obsession at least once a year. it is very consistent)

If I don't respond to something, it is either bc 1) I genuinely don't know what to say and social interactions terrify me, 2) I was too tired to respond to something when I saw it then I promptly forgot about it or 3) got anxious and convinced myself that the person who sent it hates me or something. Deepest apologies I'm just awful at stuff like that and have pretty bad anxiety I do try though <//3

I block very very generously! If you do end up blocked by me it may not be for any actually bad reasons, you could have just worded something in a way that mildly annoyed me, please dont take offense to it lmao. Me and the block button are madly in love, and I do not hesitate to press it. This is mostly just to curate an experience that is fun for me, and also to avoid me getting overly mad about random bad takes i see. Bigotry of any kind is not tolerated and you will be blocked.

I tend to ramble on about my ocs a worrying amount. As of right now, I am rather focused on my dragon age ocs, but i also have personal ocs and ocs for other fandoms

About tagging

Generally I try to tag things appropriately, although sometimes i am not the brightest and forget. If I do that's my bad I'll normally notice before too long

I tag all my art as "#my art". If you only want my art stuff, I have an alt that is solely for reblogging all my art. That is @bucket-of-crows

My rambling tag is "#crow rambles" half the time this is me yapping about my ocs, other half is me complaining about something lmao

I tag my ocs using "oc: *oc name*" as a way to organize stuff. I also use "worldstate: *worldstate name*" for dragon age worldstates, since I have a few. Any posts I make about my ocs/oc playthroughs is tagged "#my ocs"

While I don't tend to reblog sexual stuff, anything with excessive nudity is tagged as "#nsfw" just to be on the safe side

I tag all Dragon age: The Veilguard spoilers as "#dav spoilers" I will probably continue to tag this as spoilers for a while. I also tag anything critical of the game as "#dav critical" Anything critical of other dragon age games / bioware as a company is typically tagged "#bioware critical" or "#da critical"

About my ocs

Im gonna ramble about my ocs a bit, so I'll put this under a cut so this doesnt look too long lmao

I accidentally posted this instead of saving to my drafts so this section isn't done my bad

Aviae Surana

(she/her)

Aviae is my main dragon age origins oc, and I talk about her quite a bit. Shes specializes in spirit healing/arcane warrior/battle mage. Technically she also takes a little bit of levels into keeper, but I don't really consider it one of her canon class since I never use it with her like I do the others.

She romances Morrigan, and does the dark ritual with her. She puts Alistair on the throne due to her distrust of Anora. She feels guilty about it, but she would do it again in a heartbeat. Her closest friends from Origins are Zevran and Alistair, but she considers all of the people she traveled with dear friends. From the Awakening crew, Anders is practically family to her (they grew up in the Circle together, and shes always considered him like a brother), and Nathaniel becomes someone she ends up relying on. Her and Justice also get along very well, even if they butt heads on occasion.

For important decisions, she sided with the mages, made Bhelen king of Orzammar, made a truce between the Dalish and the werewolves, helped Redcliffe and saved Connor without Isolde dying. She kept Avernus alive (I'm still in the air about whether she allows him to continue his research), let the Architect live as well, and saved Amaranthine. Vigil's keep stood its ground with the upgrades she had provided it.

This is my girl! Sadly I don't have a better reference for her current canon outfit (she has an old outdated reference sheet though), so this will have to do.

In some of the older posts, I refer to her and Alistair as exes. Sadly, while this is a fascinating dynamic, it is not canon anymore. As much as I love Alistair, Aviae would not trust him enough to fall in love with him due to him having trained as a templar. Eventually they become close friends, but never more than that. She is part of my "Mage rights" Worldstate. I tag all of her posts as "oc: Aviae Surana"

Wolfe Amell

(he/him)

Lucio Hawke

(he/they) (probably) (its not like hes figured it out yet lmao)

Selene Adaar

(she/her)

Revari Mercar-Surana

(they/them)

Ena de Riva

(he/him)

Tyrian

(he/him)

Varamis

(she/her)

Other Ocs

Some ocs I either don't have a lot of content for, or dont post about enough to warrant me giving them their own section, so I'm going to put their tags down here. All posts about my ocs are tagged as "#my ocs". Some of these ocs may eventually get full sections if I get the motivation for it

Athiman Mahariel (he/him) (Dragon Age)- Morrigan romancer who made the ultimate sacrifice. Tagged as "#oc: Athiman Mahariel"

Veloura Mahariel (she/her) (Dragon Age)- Leliana romancer who got Alistair to do the dark ritual. Tagged as "#oc: Veloura Mahariel"

Viara Hawke (she/her) (Dragon Age)- Merrill romancer who sided with the mages. Tagged as "#oc: Viara Hawke"

Yvette Hawke (she/her) (Dragon Age)- Isabela romancer who sided with the mages. Tagged as "#oc: Yvette Hawke"

Zel (he/him) (Dragon Age)- Part of Selene's mercenary group. Has an au where he's Inquisitor, but that one isn't canon. Dorian romance. Tagged as "#oc: zel adaar"

Vashoth (she/her) (Dragon Age)- Part of Selene's mercenary group. Tagged as "#oc: vashoth"

Solmummer Adaar (she/her) (Dragon Age)- Josephine romancer. Tagged as "#oc: Solmummer Adaar"

Tyrian (he/him) (Pathfinder WOTR)- Tiefling, Daeran romancer, Lawful good turned Neutral good. Mystic path went from Angel to Legend path. I do actually have a lot of posts about him I just don't feel like writing a blurb about him <//3 I do adore him though. Tagged as "#oc: tyrian"

Uvara (she/her) (Pathfinder WOTR)- Dhampir, Arueshalae romancer, Chaotic Good, Azata. Tagged as "#oc: uvara"

Watcher Nyxtra (she/her) (Pillars of Eternity)- Pallegina romancer (the lack of a canon romance cannot stop me), tagged as "#oc: watcher nyxtra"

Arphae (she/her)

Grisvald (he/him)

Kaid (he/him)

Zayan (she/her)

[yinyuedijun]

Help I have another idea I need to share sjdnkek

This one's a bit wild ig so bear with me ok??! It's fluffy too and non toxic I think. I hope. Pls tell me this isn't somehow creepy I'm sorry if it is skskdkkd

SO- Aventurine × Ena! Reader.

Ena being ofc, the Gaiathra Triclops. In this version, even though everyone believes Ena was assimilated into Xipe, that's not what really happened - Ena instead made a deal with Xipe, trusting the Harmony to uphold Order, and willingly gave up their path and power as an Aeon, choosing to reincarnate as a mortal. And before they gave up their power, they did two last things: first, guarantee that their reincarnation would regain at least some knowledge of their previous life, i.e knowing that they were an Aeon before. And second, give out one last blessing to one of the people they watched over - Kakavasha.

Ena goes on to reincarnate (I'm thinking something like the Dan Heng/Dan Feng situation, so reader has dreams of their previous memories and such, but is a completely different person to who Ena was), and Reader!Ena lives a pretty tranquil life as a mortal - while Kakavasha goes through hell, and loses faith in the Gaiathra Triclops. I haven't given much thought to how they meet, but maybe Ena!Reader goes to Penacony out of curiosity for what a land presided by Harmony is like (given that they know they used to be the Aeon of Order, and that they had previously chosen to entrust Harmony with their path.) and they run into Aventurine there - and they just know. They can feel Ena's blessing on him, and they're immediately drawn to him.

Getting to know each other, creating a bond, trusting each other until Aventurine can open up about his past with them, and reader reveals their identity, and suddenly everything changes for him - he wasn't abandoned by his God, but rather they'd given him their final blessing before they passed - and reader has this strong urge to cherish and protect him, not because he's the child blessed by Ena, but because they've fallen for him. The complicated relationship they'll have to sort out where Kakavasha feels like Reader is a gift sent by Gaiathra, while Reader cherishes and worships him like he's the divine one. Aventurine being loved unconditionally and cherished for the first time, being basically worshiped by the Reader.. being treated like he's the most precious thing in the world, being looked at with pure love and adoration. The hurt, the confusion, the fear of being loved.. maybe reader can have some issues too and be so wholly devoted they'd do anything for him, no matter how much it might harm them, just to add a bit more trouble to work on.

I don't think I'll ever actually write any of my ideas (even though I do have a writing blog lmao) bc I'm too insecure about my writing and my inspiration bursts are too inconsistent, but thank you for reading my silly thoughts and letting me share them lol I really appreciate it, especially bc you're one of my favorite writers here <3

- Penacony DH smut anon (lol)

I DONT THINK ITS CREEPY AT ALL!! I adore reincarnation romances and I have a particular fondness for reincarnated deity romances. It would be so interesting to see Aventurine process this news. I really like the phrase you used wrt "the fear of being loved" - I think Aventurine would suffer very, very intensely from this fear under regular circumstances with a human. I can only imagine the state of panic he'd be in if he were the object of affection of the god who supposedly forsook him. augflgsjsk it would be so juicy... reader too I'm sure they're full of many complicated feelings just like dan heng is (I bet the two of them would be besties)

I'm sad hearing that you feel you won't write your ideas, I think they are so brilliant and I love reading them 🥺 you're always welcome to share them here - but please let me know if you do ever decide to post something, I'd love to read and reblog it <333

[creature-from-unknown-orgins]

Hiya :) You reblogged this post about things you'd like in your inbox but I couldn't pick one, so here's all of them!

•A compliment: I really like your profile pic :) did you draw it?

•A story: hmmm, this isn't really a story but i went on a school trip to Terschelling once, and I'd use up every free moment I had to go walking in the woods 5 minutes from the place we were staying :) We were in the dunes, and on my way to the forest I passed lots of snails :) The forest itself was lovely, unfortunately the weather made it look kinda sad, but on out last few days we had lovely sunny weather. There were like an endless amount of bunkers, but after a while you stop stumbling upon one every few steps you take.

Also I'd wake up at 4 am every day, bc I don't sleep well away from home, and as soon as it got light, I'd go to the forest. I think the only reason I stayed fairly calm during that trip was all the time I spent alone in the forest :) Anyways, I got lost once but somehow managed to remember the position of the sun around the time I left and found my way back that way :) I also at some point managed to accidentally walk to out next activity & I found the flattest rock I'd ever seen in that forest :) I gave it to a friend the next week bc he was crying and when people cry I instinctually want to give them rocks.

•Why you follow me: because you reblog fun stuff & i like you as a person :)

•A cute message: My cat meows in her sleep :) Also whatever life throws at you, my cat & I think you can survive it :)

•One thing you want to tell me: little fun fact for you, female wolf spiders carry their babies on their backs for a few weeks after birth & another one in case you already knew this one: there's a spider that breastfeeds (sort of, it's similar but not at all the same) (ant-mimic jumping spider, Toxeus magnus)

•One thing you want to know about me: Do you have a favourite card/board game?

Hi!! I'm so sorry for answering late, I honestly thought I'd answered it but I did not. Oops (this was so lovely to read, it made me smile a lot!)

I did draw my profile picture! I'm so happy with it :)

What a coincidence, I just went to Vlieland with school!! I spend a lot of time on the beach, it was amazing! I’m very happy for you that there was such a nice forest :)

Hehehe I like you as a person too and you’re very cool!! How much you know about bugs?? COOL

I do!! It is not my favourite as a game but I really love uno because it’s so much fun to play and you can get creative with the rules!

Thank you so much this really made my day :)

[edsbacktattoo]

ok i was kind of purposefully avoiding the details of the gravy basket theory because it's sounded so dumb but holy shit i really didn't know the extent of it. sorry in advance to be rambling in your inbox.

i thought if i wanted to talk about it i should read the post in full but honestly that was a struggle on its own. it just completely misunderstands the way the show uses ed experiencing purgatory as metaphor. like, the innkeeper does not show us this sort of wish fulfilling dream state at all, and ed externalizing his self hatred into the figment of hornigold is a simple, concise idea that the show specifically goes out of its way to make clear. episode 8 just doesn't have this. like, you'd have to make the argument that literally EVERY CHARACTER PRESENT IN THE EPISODE is somehow representative of an aspect of stede's psyche. it's not just a matter of him projecting his desires into a falsely constructed space, it's a matter of internal issues manifesting from the subconscious, which is what the show has established. it's particularly bizarre to me that they don't make any effort to argue what izzy is meant to represent in this theory, or what him dying could mean symbolically (which is. y'know. the point of the gravy basket as it's been explored). also there's just a complete disregard for ed's arc in the finale which is. eugh. come on.

and this is all still being generous in taking the idea of the "gravy basket" at face value. like, it feels a little ridiculous to even entertain the idea enough to try to argue it. i'm just so baffled.

(it did make me think about psychonauts to the point of wanting to replay it, so. i guess there's that.)

PRECISELY!!!!!!!!! don’t apologise for rambling in my inbox when you’re so correct my dear friend <3

i can’t believe that this theory has such a vice grip on some people. when it first appeared on my dash (and it did, not because a mutual reblogged it, but bc i follow the ofmd tag, and tumblr is evil and gave me the post bc it thought it was being helpful) i thought it was. a joke. i thought the op was having a laugh. but the more i read the more i started to worry. it takes a very distinct lack of media comprehension to come up with something like this.

now, i want to make it clear that i do feel for the people who enjoy izzy normally. like the folks who just like him because he’s interesting and fucked up and strange. the people that don’t woobify him, ya know? those guys are all right.

but the kind of devotion that leads to behaviour like this? threatening and belittling the writers of the show? calling ed violent and thinking he’s going to be an abuser to stede, the man he’s in love with? if you genuinely believe that then there is something seriously wrong with you, and i think you ought to look introspectively <3

also, as a side note, a large criticism i’ve seen for season 2 is poor writing (which is just not at all correct) but to make up for said “poor writing” the theories that people are whipping up are genuinely like. worse? imagine if they did the gravy basket thing again. gravy basket 2: electric boogaloo. that would be bad writing. that would be lazy!!

no, what they did instead was deliberate and careful and beautiful and hopeful. open ended and bittersweet. and yet. AND YET!!!! you get folks trying to cope so bad it makes them look stupid.

and this is all that i will say on the matter. tho, ive never played psychonauts and this might be the thing that makes me dive into that :)

[flowersandbirdsflyingfree]

Callout Post: Be Wary of the Following User

I've tried everything before. I've remained quiet, I've tried going my separate ways as peacefully as possible, I've made mistakes in impulsive arguements, and I even tried quietly moving accounts. But I'm tired of remaining quiet. There's someone who's been stalking me since the friendship break-up back in August of 2022. Originally fluffy935, now known as edwards-kronorium115, has been harrassing me in subtle ways non-stop.

We had been great friends at first in 2021, only for things to fall apart when we were making too many mistakes to upset each other within a short timespan. I made a few mistakes in accidentally reposting their screenshots due to them not having a watermark and not being able to tell which was “gifted to me” or which was completely theirs as there was no indication to tell the difference. They hadn’t added watermarks until just recently when I had checked on them.

At first, we had disagreements due to sharing the same f/o. I already do with a very close friend of mine. Unlike that close friend, Eddie would go back and forth from being supportive to lashing out at me. My old first blog here (staminuptosuccess) is deleted but there I was spammed in DMs over a friend supporting me with Edward at the time. I was called a homewrecker, spammed vomit emojis, and further insulted. It was getting so bad that I went to Twitter and left everything behind around 2022. We made up and became friends again. Only for it to get worse. It got so bad she looked me up on FACEBOOK AND SOMEHOW FOUND MY PRIVATE NAME. I cannot show the contact to avoid doxxing. But her full name is there. I was isolated. She constantly told me how “I am your only true friend.” I was manipulated often into being away from my friends. She constantly tried putting everyone down, me included. I would be built up only to be put down again. I couldn’t handle her taking out her emotions on me. No matter how hard I tried, I always did something to make her angry or sad. So, I left Twitter in the midst of her rage. I uncensored the names of friends who consent to me posting the thread.

I couldn’t take it anymore. I didn’t want to upset her anymore and frankly? I didn’t want to be abused anymore either. Every time I was starting to thrive, she’d explode. She would pepper me in drawing gifts only to slam me down that I didn’t care enough or that I ruined everything for her. So I ended it. The Facebook thing freaked me out especially bc how did she find my name?

We had a short talk of what seemed like closure and wishing each other the best in life… until it wasn’t.

She took my quiz and made her presence known twice. I’d have my post liked until I was blocked. It happened to my friend too. After a while, I was able to find a way to block her back so she’d stop the discreet spying. She would reblog the same things I did. And ever so slowly plagiarize my work.

My Kalimba video: December 31st, 2022

(To be continued. Check below)

Part 2

Part 3

[chevvy-yates]

Alright, I thought about it last night a bit.

I may just stop forcing myself to do the usual 'male v monday' 'shippy saturday' 'thirsty thursday' 'wip wednesday' stuff (I mean I can't even manage to keep up with that either) and instead post whenever I want, like I do on Friday already when everyone is posting their gorgeous females but I (if I post) do post my boys since I do not have any female oc.

I don't know if I'll completely abandon the tags for it or not. it's gonna be more: if I manage to post on that day, I'll add it, if not, I'll reblog and then tag it with the tag or sth like that.

I will still try and take my at least 30min of time a day (mostly after work around 6pm German time) to browse tblr. Queue often makes noe sense to me, sometimes I use ib when I feel I've reblogged to much in a row already but I do not tage anything that will come from my queue so you won#t even notice that it was queued.

I've also set a few blogs on receive notifications so I do not miss any new posts. I love that feature! But sometimes I have to stop using it if a blog keeps posting like every 1h through the day which will give me 24 notes a day on my phone - forcing me to look and I can't do that. I need to find some balance somehow. Still a thing to figure out to have it healthy.

I do not want to abandon looking at content because you all create so many cool things, but in this fandom, as I already said it so many times: it is just so hard to keep up with it. So please do not be mad about me or think I do not like your stuff (anymore) because I've not liked/reblogged a thing lately of your content. I often feel very 'unmenschlich' (inhuman?) when I can't find time to give some love to others work bc I receive so much from all of you, therefore I want to give it back as well.

Idk how you manage having 4+ ocs btw. I with my 4 boys feel like I abandon at least one for too long (rn it is Vijay - and it makes me so incredibly sad, no one will probably understand). But I have to keep telling myself, he will receive a whole lot of attention and love again. However, this month is for Thyjs, because he's having his birthday soon (13th) and so I will focus on him in the first place.

I decided to slide in Jaysen for something else yesterday (because spontaneous things still happen) and I'll hopp in to take a bunch of pic of him as well once my writing here is done, bc he's modeling for some new real cool pants. And then I go back to my soldier boy doing the same (if I can manage bc taking pic … takes time xD).

What elese?

I'll just need to find a balance when I do at least answer roleplay or do story writing because this also I feel very bad about It gets neglected the most, mainly because I've never been a writer. But I find such joy in it and I feel like a bad person that my rp partner always has to wait such long time until I answer. Some days I'd just love to thorw literally everything aside and just do rp 24h nonstop (we all know this doesn't work) because I love love love this story that developed in the past year and when I think about it I'm just so hyped to share it one day but it's a lot of work to do. It's gotten something like a lifetime project by now?

And I need to stop hording my drafts. Its getting ridiculous …

[snow-system-wol]

Incredibly uncanon to normal Snowverse, BUT hope y'all want the rambles about the "vampire" S'ria AU for Snowverse. (Backstory, details. Gonna put the physiology/anatomy details in a reblog bc this post is already long.)

Let's go:

The very basic background on vampire AU is essentially answering a different question that we refuse to answer in normal snowverse.

Because like. A fact of snowverse (and the reason for the name, since vague flashes of it are S'ria's earliest memories when he's in Limsa) is that there is a Mystery period of time. In between.

Point A: a scrawny teen scrambling off a balcony (has not even fully managed to clean blood off) and then dealing with being in an unfamiliar country, temps below freezing, in a part of town absolutely no miqo'te would normally be.

Point B: Confused and mostly amnesiac teen shows up in Limsa Lominsa

And like, y'know. Did someone help him? Did he somehow get on a boat to Limsa? Sneak onto a magitek ship headed to Eorzea? He doesn't really understand how functioning in society works, he can't even read, like. And just traveling through the wilderness would be deadly, he's barely gotten enough layers on to be outside at all.

In "vampire" AU, that is actually answered. How does a 15-year-old in delicate health set out from the city and head across the least populated part of the ice flats without dying? Well, he doesn't, not really.

S'ria never really saw what attacked him, but he eventually woke up and.. the cold wasn't so bad anymore. He felt strong enough to just *keep walking* until he was very far away (and actually saw people that looked like him and none that looked like Garleans.)

(And if, along that long trek, he mostly tried to eat any prey he caught raw, he didn't need to justify that to himself -- not like he knew how to cook anyway.)

Jacke has his hands even more full than usual taking S'ria in, because it doesn't take long to realize that there's a bit more of a situation than S'ria had thought.

(Anyway the only thing I handwave is like, idk how the aging thing works. It's not true vampirism, just something thematically similar, so he is not still physically 15 a decade later when ARR starts. He looks like an adult as WoL (and dating G'raha remains Fine.))

It also also adds a very fun layer to the point in the plot where instead of asking "who are you?" people start to ask "what are you?" (As Thordan quite literally does before he dies.)

And y'know, of course S'ria knows he's... well, not one of a kind probably, but may as well be. It's the sort of thing that is best kept under wraps, for public perception and all that, but it's more the world's worst kept secret in some ways. It took S'ria and Jacke years of him being sickly and weak to realize that whatever less-than-fresh bottles they were getting from the butcher wasn't what he was meant to be consuming. They make do -- the Rogue's guild is a tight knit group after all.

There are plenty of those willing to help in the Scions, once it's explained how best to keep their WoL fighting fit and strong -- but not all those in the A Team are willing, and even those that are must not overdo it... So it is more of a "Scion-wide" secret, which is only a secret in name anymore.

At least they are quick to laugh off the rumors, that "the Warrior of Light is some sort of blood-drinking beast sounds like Garlean garbage propaganda, doesn't it?" but. Open secret, really.

(I'm sure, given how things are in ffxiv, Voidsent is the category of explanation of what was out there in Garlemald given the sheer variety of traits different ones have. I suppose my thoughts are that ones like him from the Source are extremely rare, as victims are usually killed rather than Changed, but -- perhaps there was a measure of sympathy for some poor young creature who was going to die otherwise.)

On the Scion A Team and their opinions on letting S'ria feed from them:

The twins: both are willing, though Alphinaud is a little more scared of the prospect. S'ria himself refuses though, trying to find a polite way to point out that they're really quite small/young and should keep all their blood where it's meant to be. The only time he's more lax about that with Alphinaud is during HW out of necessity, as the only Ishgardian that should ever know about this situation is Haurchefant.

Urianger: earlier game -- says he would be happy to help, but seems blatantly uncomfortable with the idea (if only on a sensory and skin contact level). This changes somewhat after his time on the First.

Y'shtola: it varies, mostly depending on her trust level towards him in different expansions. She's fine with it in ARR, but is more doubtful of his restraint in like, ShB. (Perhaps reasonably so. He seemed...hungrier and less in control of himself with those last few Lightwardens killed.)

Thancred: pretty consistently fine with it, though he acts way more casual about it than he actually feels. (When he's actually Thancred, of course. Lahabrea categorically refused, mostly just side-eyeing the whole situation for any developments. Nothing under the sun is new to Ascian, but also What the Hell.)

Lyse: S'ria and her are a little awkward around each other in early game and she refuses during ARR, but by the point of SB besties she's much more "alright bon appetit or whatever, get over here" about the whole thing.

G'raha: I'll be honest, I don't think the whole question was even asked before he said yes.

Estinien: there's still a bit of an old knee-jerk reaction of a dragonhunter, that there's something unnatural about that, and then immediately decides "whatever, I've got extra blood". (He is briefly concerned that he might have traces of dragons blood in his veins, but he's pretty sure that wouldn't do anything to S'ria.)

Honorable mentions:

The lalafells: oh noo, S'ria has developed an okay sense of how much is alright to take and is quite sure that'd go badly when applied to someone half his size. Nervously denied regardless of their own stance.

[its-short-for-jackalope]

Jack's Big Rambly Nonsense Theory Post About Episode 3 ✨️

I am a merciful fella so the rambles will be contained under the cut.

hey! what's up? this is the only thing I care about for the time being so I'm gonna ramble about it! I don't know what I'm doing! all of this could be wrong! I'm very excited!

Please feel free to reply/reblog or like.. idk, y'all can tag me if you wanna make a separate post jumping off of, responding to, or completely annihilating (in a friendly way!) any of my theories here.

What The Heck Is Antikythera?

i didnt know what this was and it seemed somewhat important since it's in the title (lol) so I looked it up.

one of the first things I found was the wiki article for the Antikythera mechanism, which is basically a computer/calculator from Ancient Greece that predicted astronomical positions and eclipses. It was found in a Roman shipwreck in the Mediterranean in 1901 and might have been constructed as far back as 205 BC. (it had gears and everything! cool!)

Considering this device is related to astronomy and approximately, oh, ALL of our protagonists are interested in and have connections to astronomy, I don't think that's a coinkydink! additionally, since this is fictional and there are no limits, mayhaps the Antikythera mechanism is a part of the story and it can do (and does do) more than predict celestial events...? 👀

Now, I admit I read about this one interesting thing and kinda just ran with it, but in case there's anything else about this itty bitty little island, I did look into it more. According to the Wikipedia, Antikythera was settled and abandoned several times throughout history. This is also where the wreck with the mechanism was discovered (hence the name), and apparently lots of birds use the island as a pit stop during migration, but that's about it. It's enough for me to laugh shrug and carry on with my mechanism theories, lol.

The Ellen Austin, The Bermuda Triangle, & Maybe A Ghost Ship

Since our beloved quartet is confirmed to be aboard the Ellen Austin and they're en route through the Bermuda Triangle/Sargossa Sea where the Ellen Austin is said to have encountered a ghost ship, I'm gonna continue with my previously-held theory that we're getting a ghost ship encounter! (In one story about the Ellen Austin, they had some of the crew go onto the ghost ship to bring it back to shore with them, and the crew ~mysteriously vanished~ which is... interesting. 👀)

I have a few ideas about what this potential ghost ship might be:

An Ancient Greek vessel straight from Antikythera, with or without a mechanism, but probably with. [squints at map] I mean, the Mediterranean isn't that far from the Sargossa Sea/Bermuda Triangle area. And/or maybe there was some time-and-space nonsense happening that could land it on the other side of the Atlantic. If our quartet could get poofed from a satellite in 1835 back to Earth in 1881(?), then a mysterious ship could plausibly get zapped to another place and/or time. Might be a bit too on the nose but c'mon, the name is in the title, there's gotta be a connection to Antikythera, and who says it can't be this? Could also have ghosts!

A slightly less ancient Roman cargo ship like the (shipwrecked) one that had the Antikythera mechanism. (Please see above for hand-waving about date & location.) Maybe the ship has a mechanism on board, and maybe it's also got ghosts—both of the Ancient Greek variety via the mechanism, and of the slightly less ancient Roman variety via it's their dang boat. Bonus points if the Greek/Antikytheran(?) ghosties were scaring the daylights out of the Romans and are responsible for the ship becoming a (double) ghost ship. Of course this also hinges on how literal the "ghosts" in The Ghosts of Antikythera are, but I'll ramble about that in a little bit.

A much less ancient ship from whatever eras make it more likely to be in the Sargossa Sea, but it has an Antikythera mechanism somehow. This would take out a lot of fuss about how the ship got here or how it could have survived this long without being wrecked or discovered, AND it would bring up new and fun questions such as "why does this random ship have an Ancient Greek mechanism" and I call that a win-win. Could be a classic pirate ship, could be a newer vessel that'd be more familiar to the crew of the Ellen Austin... idk im not a boat guy but I think there's some fun possibilities.

bonus theory: the ghost ship has "witch" in the name or has a name related to witches, or maybe literally just has "wicked" in the name, purely based off this tweet:

thank you @man-down-in-hatchet-town for being my Twitter scout, lmao

Just 'cause, you know... wicked, witches. The waves could be just part of the water theme since (i assume) the episode takes place predominantly at sea, or perhaps the ghost ship is literally carried "this way" by the waves.

Ghosts — Like, Literally? Or Do You Mean Metaphorically?

We already know that Pulp Musicals will be exploring multiple genres—sci-fi, horror, mystery, adventure—so I'm betting episode three will add some horror to the mix, especially after Matt's delightfully ominous words in the trailer:

In this web of mystery, Margaret has begun to unravel her own... but she is not the only one awakening. And soon, our heroes will find that the light of discovery can bring forth shadows darker than anything they could have ever imagined.

...Yeah, sounds like horror and/or ghosts to me! So maybe the ghosts of Antikythera are real actual spooky scary spirits, in which case I am very excited to pull up a chair and listen to Herschel scoff and try to find a rational, scientific explanation for any spooky happenings. (Idk if he believes in ghosts or not, but in this case I hope he doesn't because that will make it much funnier for me. <3 )

On the other hand, "horror" is incredibly vague, so maybe we won't get jump-out-and-say-boo ghosts at all. Maybe the ghosts of Antikythera are more unsettling because they aren't an active, supernatural force wreaking havoc on the open sea—maybe they're just an empty vessel, forgotten memories, and the lingering consequences of the actions taken by people who are long since dead. What's scarier—the dead staying behind to screw with you face to face, or the dead abandoning their troubles & mistakes and leaving clueless strangers to get stuck with the deadly fallout?

Honestly, tho? I'm excited either way, and I'm very curious to see how scary Matt plans to go.

Theories That Don't Have A Ghost Ship, Because You Never Know

I am 100% behind the ghost ship theory, but making theories is fun so why not throw some other ones out there. Full disclosure, I don't think these are that likely, and some are mostly gonna be for laughs.

They find a shipwreck. I'm really only considering this because the Antikythera mechanism was found on a wreck. I don't think the Ellen Austin would stop to investigate a shipwreck if they happened upon one, and I also don't know if they'd even have the equipment to safely or effectively investigate it if they wanted to. Then again, maybe they would stop if they saw the wreck go down, and also who needs to go down in the water if you have a passenger with magic powers? If Margaret could launch the Sagitta, she could probably fish up a wreck easy peasy. Maybe she wouldn't even need the ship to stop, she could just see (or sense?) something in the water and reach out with the Radiance. And if whatever she brought onto the Ellen Austin was haunted, then that could kick off the ghost stuff... huh. I actually kinda like this idea!

Atlantis? I think someone mentioned this in the chat for the trailer's premiere. I'm inclined to say "probably not" though... unless the quartet gets poofed or otherwise summoned closer to Greece. But I think they'll probably be sticking around the Sargossa Sea, since there isn't a lot of time for them to be traveling all around in a ~90 minute episode, and the previous episodes kinda picked a place and stayed there. Doesn't necessarily mean we couldn't get an underwater city (or formerly underwater city), of course. It just probably wouldn't be Atlantis.

...I actually don't have any other ideas right now, lol. I really think it's gonna be a ghost ship. And that the Antikythera mechanism has something to do with it.

Oof okay, for the sake of my eyes and brain, I'm going to stop staring at my phone and thinking for now, lol. I will probably come up with some more thoughts & theories as time goes on, but I think I have used all my batteries for today.

Again, if anybody reads this and wants to contribute or comment, feel free! 💫