#and it slipped by before it could even start bc of the spying and the 'never tell' & the awkward first potions class & harry's scar hurting

[severus-snaps]

"because despite the Prince's violent betrayal, he doesn't reject him and is still attached to him [insert meta about the potential parallels to Lily's friendship with Snape, what she saw in him, and why they remained friends for some time even when Snape became more immersed in the Dark Arts"

watch me cry

Canon: Harry overhears Malfoy intimidating Borgin and figures out that he's been branded with the Dark Mark

Steve Kloves: Harry sees Malfoy meet a bunch of Death Eaters in Borgin and Burkes and figures out it was a ceremony to give Malfoy a Dark Mark

No but what I love about the movie version of events is that it implies that any Death Eater can brand anyone with the Dark Mark or, even better, that Voldemort was there in Borgin and Burkes and no one saw or heard him and he just popped into a shop in Knockturn Alley, tatooted a kid, and peaced out. I know I talk a lot about how Rowling (boo, hiss) was thoughtless with her world building, but she has nothing on Steve Kloves. I'm pretty sure he wrote those scripts with a crayon stuck between his toes.

[somnambulants]

Can i request readerxnatasha first time? All good if you don't write smut though xx

she’s the sunset in the west

word count: 1.7K notes: i kinda combined this with another prompt: "intertwining your hands with your lover while making love" bc im feeling v soft today lmao hope you enjoy!  warnings: allusions to lack of bodily autonomy/coerced interactions. 

minors pls don’t interact! 18+ only!

Sex has always been a weapon for her.

Natasha knows she can get whatever she wants from whoever she wants if she just flaunts herself in front of them enough to get their attention. She’s not naïve; her whole life has been set up for her to use her body to get what she wants.

It’s something they teach you in the red room from the time you can walk: your body is your biggest weapon. No one will anticipate you coming.  

And it’s true. 

No one ever sees her coming. 

Natasha has walked into many rooms and turned many heads and managed to take out multiple targets with all eyes on her and without anyone batting those eyes because they were so distracted by her.

It’s where the term black widow comes from. You see her but you don’t see her.

And that’s how she lives her life, with people seeing her but not seeing her. It’s what makes her such a good spy; such a good assassin. People might know she’s dangerous from the second they see her but they’ll be dead and she’ll be long gone before they realise exactly just how dangerous.

No one seems to see through it.

Until she meets you.

You, who met her while she was half naked and soaking wet, everything on display, after a mission had gone slightly wrong and didn’t even blink twice as you shrugged off your own jacket and handed it to her with a kind smile while some of her own teammates struggled to keep their eyes to themselves.

She’s pretty sure she fell in love with you right then and there, with your eyes on the ground, pointedly averted, a faint pink flush staining both of your cheeks and crawling down your neck.

--

Your relationship with Natasha is great. Amazing, in fact. You don’t think you could ask for better or more.

There’s just one thing really.

Sometimes you don’t feel like she’s really there when you’re being intimate. In the moment. Sometimes it’s as though she’s going through the motions and just doing what she feels needs to be done. Or what she thinks you want her to do.

Like right now.

She’s kissing you like she’s on autopilot. You love kissing her and you’re enjoying it, no doubt about that, as you sit splayed across her lap with her arms around you like a cage. 

 You love it. And her.

It just doesn’t feel quite right. 

You know, subconsciously, there must be a reason you’ve been dating for all these months and haven’t had sex yet. You know Natasha has had a lot of sex and you’re not exactly inexperienced yourself in that department.

And yet, every time you get close, she’ll suddenly push you away and make an excuse to leave. 

You know there must be a reason. You just don’t know why or how to broach the subject with her. 

Or you thought you didn’t.

“Why don’t you want to have sex?”

You don’t mean for it to slip out and you cover your mouth as soon as it does, but the damage is already done.

Below you, Natasha, hands still on your waist – at a perfectly decent height, as though she thinks your parents might walk in and catch you at any second – freezes and looks at you with wide eyes.

“I – I do,” she says after a second, stuttering a little over her words. It would be amusing in any other circumstance to see Natasha Romanoff, the most unflappable person you’ve ever met in your life, struggling for words.

You stare at her until she swallows and looks away from you. “I do,” she repeats, quiet in a way that is distinctly non-Natasha like. “I’m just not used to this.”

It doesn’t make sense to you, what she’s saying but you stay quiet, sensing she’s building up to something and not wanting to interrupt her when it seems like she’s opening up to you about something important.

“I don’t know how to do …,” she waves a hand in between you wordlessly. You know you must look as confused as you feel because she lets out a huff of frustration. “I don’t know. This –It’s hard. For me. To do this with someone I care about.”

She looks so defeated as the words leave her mouth. You suck in a breath as realisation starts to sink in, feeling nauseous at the implication you’re getting from what she’s just said.

“We don’t have to do anything, Nat, ” you say quietly, tilting your head so she has to look at you as you speak. “Not now. Not ever…. if that’s not something you want. I’m sorry if I --”

“No! No!” she interrupts. She seems to have pinpointed where your thoughts have gone and she leans in, looking at you seriously. “No. Of course I want to. I just don’t know how…I’m used to..”

She doesn’t have to finish. You know exactly what she means and for a second, you’re overcome with such vibrant anger at the thought that no one has ever treated her the way she deserves.

You want to make sure she never feels like that again.

“Okay,” you say slowly, as a plan formulates in your head. You’re not sure if it’s the right thing to do but Natasha is looking at you uncertainly, like she thinks you’re going to up and run at any minute so you have to act fast. “Okay, if you’re sure. Can I try something? Please?”

Still looking uncertain, Natasha nods straight away. You lean in to kiss her gently and she immediately reciprocates, pulling you closer, deepening the kiss as though you’ll pull away at any moment.

After you break the kiss, you slide off her lap and then off the couch all together, kneeling down so you’re in front of her.

There’s confusion in her eyes as you do but you don’t address it until you’re settled.

You place your hands on her thighs. “Tell me to stop, okay?” The if you’re uncomfortable goes unsaid but you know she must be able to see it written across your face because she nods, biting her lip.

Hands still on her thighs, you kiss every spot you can reach and are delighted as she lets out a little laugh.

Encouraged, you continue until you reach her thighs.

Watching her carefully, you shift, helping her out of her underwear and pulling it down her legs. As you do, she looks back at you evenly, a little smile now playing around the corners of her mouth.

Internally, you breathe a sigh of relief. This was the right move then. You’re sure of it now. 

This is the most relaxed you’ve seen her like this, you think. You hate that you hadn’t noticed any of this earlier.

But at least, you can do your best from now on by knowing what to look for.

You move your hands, and seeming to read your mind, she meets you in the middle, letting you intertwine your fingers on either side of her thighs as you rest your head on her stomach, watching her for any signs that she isn’t as comfortable with this as she seems. “Okay?”

You can’t see anything in her eyes to indicate it isn’t but still, you wait until she nods, giving you the green light. 

“Yeah,” she says, as you lean back down. Her hips buck a little at the first touch of your tongue against her and she lets out a little breath, biting her lip as she looks at you with darkened eyes: “Yes.”

You continue, encouraged by her little moans and sounds that she makes no attempt to stifle, wasting little time detaching one of your hands to press a finger into her and inhaling sharply as you feel how wet she is around you.

Your actions are rewarded with a moan that quicky turns into a high-pitched gasp as you add another finger quickly after.

You thrust into her, picking up speed as she moans, shoving her hips onto your fingers eagerly in a plaintive request for more. She gets louder as you add a third and you feel her stretch around you. Louder still, when you brush over her clit with your thumb. 

“Okay?” you ask again, a little teasingly. No doubt hearing it, she glares down at you but can’t quite hide the smile on her face, pushing her hips up to meet your fingers.

The smile quickly crumbles in favor of a small cry as you thrust into her harder. Her eyes flutter a little and she bites down on her lower lip. “So okay.”

With your fingers now inside her, you turn your attention to her clit, laving your tongue with it and trying not to grin when she cries out, squeezing you so tightly it’s hard for you to keep going at the pace you are.

She squeezes your hand, digging her nails into your skin as her thighs lock around your head and keep you in place.

In response, you double your efforts and are rewarded as she starts to fall apart above you. 

There’s blissful white noise in your head as she arches her back with a moan – filthier and louder than the rest, as she comes -- cutting off your air supply entirely to the point that you wouldn’t be surprised if you blacked out.

You wouldn’t mind. In fact, you think this would be the best possible way to go.

When she finally releases you, you stay where you are, ignoring the cramp in your legs and rest your head on her stomach again, gazing up at her as she comes down, still twitching occasionally.

She runs her free hand through your hair rhythmically as her chest rises and falls, trying to catch her breath. 

She looks like, for lack of better words, a mess. Hair sticking to her neck, cheeks flushed. She’s still wearing her bra, but the straps are now falling down, off her shoulders.

You think you probably don’t look any better yourself.

She’s so beautiful you think you could stare at her for the rest of your life and not get bored.

You squeeze the hand you’re still holding and her eyes flutter open, meeting yours immediately. “All good?” you ask softly.

She lets out an incredulous sounding little huff, pulling you up so you’re in her lap and she can kiss you.

You moan as she licks the taste of herself off your lips.

“Very much good,” she says, playfully, when you pull apart to breathe for a second.

She kisses you again, deeper and more intensely before shoving you away and reversing your positions. “Your turn.”

[haledamage]

“We can share the bed. If that’s not weird.” For your choice, bc it’s good for too many of them

Marii and Theron ended up claiming this one 😁 before Rishi but after the Forged Alliances stuff, during the nebulous “looking for more information” portion in between. Marii desperately wanted to have some proper Spy Jedi shenanigans, so what should have been a thousand words of awkward pre-ship yearning instead became a whole Thing

---

Theron Shan was not a Jedi.

This was an indisputable fact, one that had in many ways defined the man he’d become. It had shaped the trajectory of his life, for good or ill.

That didn’t stop him from driving like one.

Marii had been told several times that she, and most other Jedi, drove like they took the “there is no death” line from the Code as a personal challenge. Theron drove the same way, heedless of both the speed and the danger, as if he could sense trouble coming before it arrived and had the reflexes to avoid it, if only narrowly. He barely even watched where he was going, attention split between the traffic they were weaving through, his wrist comm, and shooting back at their pursuers.

He took a sharp right, his speeder drifting around the corner hard enough to make the stabilizers whine in protest and missing the side of a building by millimeters before they shot off in their new direction. Marii barely reacted beyond steadying herself on the back of the seat she was kneeling in; her focus was on the four speeders chasing them, redirecting the steady hail of blaster bolts directed at them to keep them from hitting their mark - or hitting any of the nearby commuters.

“This would be a lot easier if you knew how to use a blaster,” Theron yelled to be heard over the wind rushing past them.

“I told you to let me drive!” It would be a hot day on Hoth before he let anyone else drive his speeder, no matter how much more sense it would’ve made; it was one of the first things Marii had learned about him, and also something she and Kira teased him about endlessly. “How do you want to do this?”

“Quiet didn’t work.” He aimed his blaster over his shoulder, firing blindly. There was a crack of shattering glass as the bolt hit the windshield of one of the speeders chasing them. It swerved wildly, nearly taking out the one next to it before righting itself. “Let’s go loud.”

That’s exactly what she’d been hoping he would say, and her wild grin told him as much. “Get me an empty lane. I can’t do anything with so many people around us.”

“Might want to hold on to something.” That was the only warning Theron gave before they dropped out of the sky.

Marii grabbed the edge of the seat, trying to ignore the thrill of temporary weightlessness and keep an eye on their pursuers.

They’d miscounted. There were six, not four. Two speeder bikes joined the others as they followed their descent at a little more sedate pace.

“Theron.”

“I see them.” He hit a few buttons on the dashboard, and they somehow picked up even more speed.

It still wasn’t enough to outrun blaster bolts. One slipped past her guard and grazed the driver’s side mirror, sending a shower of sparks at Theron.

“Marii!”

“On it.”

As soon as they leveled out, Marii climbed out of her seat, trusting in the Force - and Theron’s driving - to keep her feet planted to the back of the speeder as she drew her lightsabers. They activated with a hiss, the twin white blades making her a very obvious target in the neon-lit dusk of Nar Shaddaa. Predictably, the incoming blasterfire all started targeting her exclusively; none of it could get past her blades.

Now that they didn't have to worry about hurting civilians, their job was a lot easier. The first speeder was neatly bisected by a thrown lightsaber. With Marii there to shield him, Theron could take a few extra seconds to aim, and a well-placed shot sent one bike careening into the other, taking them both out. The fourth took a turn too wide and ended up embedded in an office building. The fifth one…

"Is that a rocket launcher?"

Theron dropped his blaster to the passenger-side floorboards and grabbed Marii’s ankle instead, keeping her from losing her balance as she deflected the first rocket that headed their way. She managed to knock the second one away too, barely; it exploded close enough to send the speeder veering off course. 

A third rocket didn’t come immediately, but it was probably only a matter of time. They wouldn’t be able to dodge them forever, no matter how good of a pilot he was.

On some unspoken signal, Theron released her ankle and slammed on the brakes, letting the remaining pursuers close the gap. As soon as they were close enough, Marii leapt toward the speeder with the rocket launcher. She landed hard on the hood, making it drop a couple meters before it righted itself. Three people stared back at her with identical expressions of confused shock at her sudden arrival.

The last remaining speeder zipped past them, heading straight for Theron, and Marii had to push away the worry that shivered up her spine. He was a grown man, and one who’d been doing this even longer than she had. He didn’t need a Jedi playing righteous defender; he could protect himself. She trusted him to do so, and kept her eyes on the rocket man.

He lifted the launcher, intending to blow her up at point blank range. Stupid for many reasons, but most of all because he was well within range of her lightsabers. She cut the launcher in half, the pieces of it - and the live and whole rockets inside them - falling into the back seat. Rocket Man swore and reached for the blaster at his hip.

One of the other two passengers grabbed Marii’s arm, attempting to either throw her off the side or grapple her long enough for Rocket Man to shoot her. A flourish of her blade removed the offending grip, as well as the offending hand, and a quick push with the Force knocked both her attacker and his partner out of the speeder. She turned back to Rocket Man and dispatched him with an almost careless swing of her sword.

And then there was only her, in a pilotless vehicle full of rockets.

Marii leapt from the wayward speeder as it careened toward an intersection, dragging one saber through the fuel tank as she fell past it. Better to blow it up now than let it wander off and injure someone. 

She scanned the buildings on either side as she descended, looking for a place to land. She’d probably survive a fall all the way to the planet’s surface - she’d survived worse, certainly, and the Force had always been her ally in this way specifically - but it would still hurt like hell.

She was saved the trouble as a familiar speeder swooped up underneath her and scooped her out of the air. She landed with an oof, half in Theron’s lap and half in the seat next to him. Her saber hilts joined his blaster on the floor as she slumped against him in relief.

Theron looked unbearably smug, but he deserved to be. “Need a lift?”

She let out a breathless laugh and pressed her face to his shoulder in silent gratitude. Thank the stars that she’d found the only spy in SIS as stupidly reckless as she was. “Well, that’s one way to pick up women.”

“It may not be subtle, but it has a hundred percent success rate.” He wound his arm around her waist, sort of a hug and sort of just making sure she stayed in place while he drove around a corner into a labyrinth of narrow alleyways. “You okay?”

She nodded. “A little banged up, but nothing serious, thanks to you. How’re you?”

“Just bruises,” he shrugged. “That could’ve gone a lot worse. Did we get what we needed?”

Marii activated her earpiece while she scrambled back into her seat. “Kira, what’s your status?”

“Do you want the good news or the bad news?” Kira kept talking without waiting for an answer. “Good news is, your distraction worked. Teeseven got your bug planted and it’s already transmitting. Bad news, your nest of Revanites is on high alert, and they’re on the lookout for two people who look a lot like you and spy boy.”

“Of course they are,” Marii said dryly.

“Still glad you took this job, boss?”

She glanced over at Theron, only to find he was already looking her way. He gave her a lopsided smile, the one he used when he was trying to look disarming. It didn't really work, but she still found it distractingly attractive, even with a split lip and rapidly darkening black eye - gifts from his fight with the last speeder, presumably. "Don’t ask questions you already know the answer to," she muttered to her former padawan.

“You two might wanna lay low for a little while and let this blow over,” Kira continued like Marii hadn’t said anything, but she could hear the smirk in her voice. “Take the rest of the night off, order in, maybe watch a movie. Find somewhere safe until morning and we’ll meet up then.”

"Kira…" It wouldn’t be the first time Kira had tried some convoluted scheme to get Marii and Theron to spend some time together outside of work, though a high-speed chase across Nar Shaddaa was a little much even for her. 

"What? No ulterior motives this time, I swear," she replied, as sweetly as she could. "See you at breakfast."

The call ended and Marii sighed.

“Let me guess.” They emerged from the alleyway and back into busy streets, merging into the flow of traffic and slowing to match the speed of everyone around them. “Our favorite cultists are sending more people our way?”

“More or less.”

He was quiet for a few minutes while he thought, before finally announcing, “We should probably find a hotel for the night or something. Wouldn't want to lead them back to the safehouse if they manage to track us down.”

By the stars, Marii hated when Kira was right. She could almost feel her gloating from across the city. “Okay. I’ll follow your lead. I’m a little out of my depth.”

“You’re doing great,” he told her sincerely. “Really.”

It was a struggle to stifle the proud grin that his casual praise brought about, and she wasn’t entirely successful. Something about the offhand compliments Theron liked to give her made her feel the same thrill that racing across the city at top speed had, the same kind of weightless joy.

The city flew past in a stream of gold and neon. It wasn’t an area Marii was familiar with from her admittedly limited experiences on Nar Shaddaa, but Theron seemed as confident as ever, so she let herself sit back and enjoy the ride. Now that the fight was over, pain and exhaustion started to settle in, and the idea of a bed - even an unfamiliar one in some cheap hotel - was sounding better every minute.

She stayed quiet as Theron gave the receptionist a fake name, an even faker story, and a charming enough smile and large enough pile of credits that they wouldn’t ask questions. They took the lift in companionable silence.

They both stopped in the doorway of their room and stared. The room was so gaudy it would make a Hutt palace look understated. It looked like a fabric store had exploded, but only the velvet and silk departments had landed here. It looked like someone had tried to build a circus tent out of burgundy velvet and was storing it here for the winter. The bed was massive and completely circular, directly in the middle of the room, and off to one corner was something that looked an awful lot like a jacuzzi tub.

Marii regretted not listening closer when Theron was booking the room. What cover had he given that had landed them in the honeymoon suite?

Oh well. At least it was clean, and big enough for two people as tall as they were to move around comfortably. She shrugged and stepped inside, heading to the bathroom. She considered the giant clawfoot tub, wondering how much he’d judge her for taking advantage of the circumstances, but ultimately decided to just hop into the refresher to wash off the worst of the soot and dirt from their day.

When she came back out, Theron was on his datapad, sitting on an ostentatious, overstuffed loveseat in front of the holo-fireplace. It didn’t surprise her in the slightest; in the months they’d been working together like this, she’d gotten used to his work habits. She was fairly certain at least one of his implants was so he could keep working while he slept--but he slept so rarely that she couldn’t say for sure.

Force help her, she thought it was cute. Frustrating on occasion, but cute.

She sat down next to him and carefully touched the bruise over his eye, making sure nothing was broken underneath it. His eyes drifted closed at her touch, work temporarily forgotten. “How’s your head?”

“Nothing that can’t be fixed with some painkillers and a good night’s sleep.” He winced when she touched a sensitive spot and she pulled her hand away. “Too bad we won’t find either of those here.”

“I don’t think this room is meant for… sleep.” She cringed, but it just made him laugh. “You should take the bed. A bad night’s sleep is better than none at all.”

“No way,” he said immediately. “I’m not gonna make you sleep on the floor.”

“I’m a Jedi. I’ll meditate or something.” It still wouldn’t be the worst sleep she’d ever gotten, but she didn’t say as much. “It’ll be fine.”

“Or… we could share the bed. If that wouldn’t be weird.” He stood up from the loveseat and paced across the room, as if he couldn’t look at her while making the suggestion. “It would be weird, wouldn’t it? Forget I said anything. Next time I’ll make sure to get a double room.”

“Maybe we should work on our cover,” she teased, kneeling on the loveseat so she could turn around and watch him pace. “Find one that doesn't land us in the honeymoon suite. Or at least in a better honeymoon suite.”

“Sorry, I panicked.” He rubbed the back of his neck and gave her that crooked boyish grin again. Her traitorous heart skipped a beat. “I’m still not used to this whole teamwork thing.”

“It’s okay. I don’t mind,” she assured. “The cover story or sharing the bed.”

“Oh.” That got him to stop pacing, at least. He finally came back over to the loveseat, propping a hip against the back of it so they were relatively close to eye-to-eye. “Okay. Good.”

“Just… do me a favor?”

“Anything,” Theron vowed without hesitation.

Oh. Oh. Marii had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep a ridiculous smile off her face. “Don't tell Kira. I'll never hear the end of it.”

He scoffed a laugh. “Trust me, I’m already learning that the less she knows the better.”

Getting ready for bed was somehow both more and less awkward than Marii would have expected. She was very aware of Theron’s presence in the room, but that wasn’t altogether new. They’d been spending a lot of time together, early mornings and late nights and hours at a console sharing a pot of caf and speaking in half-formed thoughts. Familiarity had only made her more conscious of him.

But at the safehouse, they all had their own rooms (except Teeseven and Teethree, who chose to be roommates), and the knowledge that they were sharing this room made even the act of removing her gloves and boots feel salacious. Watching Theron remove his jacket felt even moreso, though she couldn’t put a finger on why; she’d seen him without it plenty of times.

Marii laid down on her back, as far away from Theron as the weird circular bed allowed. Her own face stared down at her from the ceiling, where a gilded-framed mirror hung. It must’ve been concealed by all the draped fabric, because she hadn’t noticed it until she was directly under it.

“This is karking ridiculous,” Theron grumbled. “What the hell kind of people stay in a room like this deliberately?”

“Are you telling me you didn’t plan this, Agent Shan?” She couldn’t keep the laughter out of her voice, but she tried to keep a straight face. “I’m disappointed.”

“Hey.” He managed to sound genuinely offended, but the corner of his mouth twitched with the effort to conceal a smile. “Give me a little credit.”

When she met his eyes in his reflection in the mirror, she couldn’t hold back anymore and dissolved into giggles. She had to roll over to muffle her laughter in her pillow, on the off chance that the walls were thin enough that her amusement would wake the rest of the hotel. But then Theron joined her and she stopped caring; she could draw the wrath of everyone in the building and it would be worth it.

When they’d finally calmed down, Marii’s sides and cheeks ached in the best way, and the air was clear of the awkwardness that had tried so hard to settle over them. Theron laid much closer now, only a handful of centimeters of ludicrous red silk sheets between them, his head propped up on one hand as he stared down at her with amusement still dancing in his eyes.

“Anything I should know?” he asked in a loud whisper, like they were at risk of being caught up past curfew. “Do you snore? Talk in your sleep?”

“I’ve never had any complaints.” Granted, the only sources she would’ve had were her bunkmates as a youngling and Kira in the early days on the Wayfaring Stranger when the ship felt too empty with just them and Teeseven. Semantics. “You?”

“I hog the blankets.”

She poked him lightly in the chest, pushing just enough to make him lean slightly on his one-armed perch. “I’d like to see you try, spy boy.”

He rocked back toward her, a tiny bit closer than before, and all the humor abruptly drained from his face. Her first instinct was that she'd accidentally hurt him, or that he simply didn't want to be touched. She started to apologize, but the words died on her lips at the look he gave her as soon as she opened her mouth.

It wasn’t the first time he’d looked at her like that, quiet and intense with something akin to hunger darkening his eyes. No doubt her expression was similar. It didn’t happen often enough that she’d gotten up the nerve to address it, but often enough that it was clearly more than incidental. That it meant something.

Normally this was when Kira would call, or an urgent message from Lana or Major Jorgan would arrive. But they weren’t here now to interrupt.

And, it turned out, they didn’t have to be. Among Theron’s many talents, one of them was apparently self-sabotage. Marii could see his adam's apple bob as he swallowed hard, then he forced a smile and leaned back to put a little distance between them. It didn’t really help. “We should, uh, we should probably get some sleep. Before the next disaster arrives.”

We don’t have to. The words wouldn’t make it past the lump in her throat. There was a line there, the width of a lightsaber and shaped suspiciously like his family name, that she wasn’t ready to cross. Yet. Instead, she said, “I guess so.” She was thankful her disappointment wasn’t audible in her voice. “Good night, Theron.”

“Good night, Marii.”

The bed was still too big and too soft, the silk sheets clinging to her clothes, but Marii felt safe here, somehow. That, combined with the exhaustion of the day, dragged her into unconsciousness faster than she would’ve normally expected. She slept deep and dreamless, and awoke the next morning a few minutes before their alarm went off.

Theron hadn’t stolen the blankets in the night, but he had stolen half of her pillow, sprawled carelessly across the bed while somehow managing not to crowd her. His hair was a mess, spiked up at odd angles, and in the morning light (such as it was on Nar Shaddaa) the bruise over his eye was the same burgundy as the sheets.

Her stomach did a funny little flip at the sight. He was without a doubt the most beautiful man she’d ever seen, even like this. Maybe especially like this.

A shrill beep from Theron’s datapad signaled that it was time to get up. He groaned and fumbled with his wrist comm until the noise stopped, then buried his face in the pillow. Marii watched with undisguised amusement as it slowly dawned on him where he was and that he wasn’t alone.

He finally rolled over enough to look her way, squinting as if the bit of light they had was still too bright. He gave her a lazy grin. “Hey.”

“Good morning.”

He groaned again and rolled over onto his back. “How’s my hair?” he asked, as if there wasn’t a mirror directly overhead that he could consult about it.

“Never better.” She brushed her hand over the remnants of his mohawk, attempting to either flatten it the rest of the way or tidy it up. It refused to do either. “No, really. It’s cute.”

“I don’t believe you, but I’ll take it.”

As quickly as possible, they got dressed and snuck out of the hotel. They didn’t talk much on the drive back, keeping a wary eye out for anyone following them. It looked like they’d managed to escape reinforcements, at least for now.

They parted ways as soon as they stepped into the familiar confines of the safehouse, Theron heading for the workstation to check on their Revanite trackers and Marii heading to the kitchen to scrounge up something for breakfast. 

She started the caf pot with a wave of her hand, then dug through the fridge to find something she could eat. Doc must’ve stopped by and dropped off groceries - a passive-aggressive effort to make them all stop only eating junk food and takeout - so she grabbed the carton of eggs and an armful of vegetables that wouldn’t require too much chopping and took them over to the counter.

Kira leaned against the cabinets next to her, a knowing smirk on her face as she watched her muddle her way through cooking. “How was the honeymoon suite, boss?” 

Marii tried to stifle her reaction, but she knew it was futile; her partner would be able to feel her alarm through their bond. She chose not to say anything and just scowled at her half-cooked omelet.

Kira’s face lit with a delighted grin. “Are you serious? That’s a smoother move than I would’ve expected from him. Good on you, spy boy.” Theron was thankfully both too far away and too distracted by work to hear her.

Marii glanced over her shoulder anyway, just in case he’d moved into the kitchen and she hadn’t noticed. “Nothing happened,” she muttered.

“His loss.” Kira stared toward the living room where Theron was having a conversation with the droids - or possibly being yelled at by them, if the indignant beeping was any indication. “Want me to get some more Revanites to chase you around town? Maybe second time’s the charm.”

“I feel like there’s got to be an easier way.” Like talking to him about it, but thankfully that wasn’t the kind of suggestion Kira would make. Too obvious, and she knew she wouldn’t be allowed to eavesdrop. “But thanks for the support.”

She shrugged. “What’re friends for?” 

Kira didn’t say anything else as Marii finished cooking, but she could tell she wanted to. Only when the omelets were done (a little brown in places, but serviceable) and plated did she grab her by the elbow and pull her down closer to her height so she could talk quietly. “As a fellow Jedi, I’m required to remind you that romantic attachment is against the rules. But as your friend…” she glanced over Marii’s shoulder pointedly, and there was no doubt who she was looking at, “don’t let him get away, Mar.”

Theron stepped into the kitchen before she could reply, closing a holocall on his wrist comm as he approached them.

“Hey.” He looked like he was about to say more, but he stopped, glancing back and forth between the two Jedi suspiciously. “What’d I miss?”

Kira just laughed and walked away with her breakfast.

Marii handed him a cup of caf and an omelet. She nudged his shoulder with hers as she walked past him to the dining table. “I’ll tell you later.”

[goldrushzukka]

Vision (both parts)

#11, #12, #14 and #20

#11: Was there a scene that you hadn't originally planned to include? Why did you decide to fit it in? / #12: Was there a scene you wished you could have included? Why didn't it fit in?

these basically have the same answer so im just gonna lump them together. weirdly enough, vision doesn't have any outtakes or surprise scenes. i didn't really plan out the first part, i just wrote it as it came to me and it all went in. the second part was for the zukka big bang so i did have to plan it a little bit, but even then everything that went in was supposed to be there from the start pretty much. the closest i really came to a cut scene with vision (barring the fact that i still haven't technically finished part 2) is bits of prose that never made it into the published version of the fic. i will share some with you now bc i feel like it, from the v2 cutting room floor:

It’s surprisingly easy to keep the secret from Katara.

She doesn’t ask anything more about why Zuko is coming with them, and once she’s past the initial surprise of him, it’s easy to fall into other topics of conversation. Zuko almost forgets that they’re even hiding anything from her.

Almost.

Only ever almost, because in the same breath that Zuko remembers he’s allowed to touch Sokka and look at him and want him, he remembers that he can’t do that without a closed door. 

It’s familiar, he realises. That’s why it’s easy. He’s already so used to hiding how strongly he feels about Sokka that it’s second nature to sit next to him at the dinner table or listen to him talk about an idea he has or spar with him and pretend not to be hot under the collar about it all.

It’s easy not to let anything slip, because Zuko has had plenty of practice. Zuko is a master of holding his cards to his chest.

During the day, with Katara around them the whole time, it’s not hard to keep a lid on it. But the nights - the nights are wide and dark enough that any whisper is swallowed up before it can reach the wrong ears. The nights hold no secrets.

(there's also some very horny bits that im saving for a later date/ill post if literally even one person asks)

(#14 requires a little bit of audience participation for me to answer, sorry!!)

#20: What is something you wish more people noticed about this fic?

there's lots of bits in part 1 where people (katara) are whispering conspiratorially only to suddenly stop when zuko approaches. i know the real focus of the fic is the grand romance but i desperately want everyone to know that from katara's point of view, this is a heist movie. she is an international super spy. she is a black widow, if black widows were matchmakers. the world is her chess board and she is anya taylor joy in that netflix show my mother really liked.

(read isn't this the vision that you wanted here)

[zettaiunmeis]

HI THANKS TO @raventrigonsdaughter LETTING ME KNOW THAT OG GAME CARMEN AND JULIA USED TO BE PARTNERS BEFORE CARMEN WENT ROGUE, LET ME PROPOSE: VILE!JULIA.

details under the cut because this got Long

jules is part of the either the same class the ~infamous~ black sheep

and they don’t? really like each other? like julia is still kinda Serious and she doesnt really appreciate the vile squad goofing around and tossing water balloons or whatever and black sheep finds julia a little too uptight even if she’s interested in a lot of the same things (history, etc.)

black sheep’s speciality is Being SLick, as we know, but julia’s is patterns (and also historical artifacts)

ok but the important part of this is that bc julia’s is patterns, she ends up being like a scout or smth along those lines bc she can analyse patterns and report back to help plan the caper

and that basically means that when she graduates, she ends up in far more long cons than any of the others

anyway, after black sheep gets in trouble for the water balloon thing, the faculty decide she’s far too mischievous, and so, they assign her a partner — julia

(side note: its kind of the same thing that ends up happening to jean-luc and antonio a bit later on, but thats more because they work well together, and less bc either one of them needed a grounding influence)

anyway black sheep and jules again. do not like each other. but that doesnt mean they dont work well together — julia’s got an eye for patterns, and black sheep has every thieving trick in the book ready and waiting up her sleeves (alongside an instinct for thievery)

slowly, as they are forced to work together more and more, they kind of reach a less tense partnership and then one day black sheep makes a history joke and thats how they become friends

like julia is still very pointedly Not friends with the rest of the vile squad bc they’re still very reckless and immature, etc

but shes sort of seen black sheep when she’s been more grounded and less hyper/feral and she?? kind of doesnt mind??

bc grounded black sheep isnt constantly trying to prove that she’s The Best and grounded black sheep isnt trying to prove that she’s more than just the teacher’s pet — she’s kind of just having fun with julia and julia’s been so serious about her training that she hasnt really made any other friends and…. its nice

its nice to have black sheep loudly slip into the seat next to her and and tease julia about whatever recent historical discovery she’s researching and pull her out of her own head once in a while

and its nice to have black sheep glance over in the middle of class when sheena — sorry tigress — whines about something or the other and roll her eyes in the same way julia feels like doing, even if something strange sticks in her throat when carmen does the same with gray

she can’t pinpoint the exact moment, but at some point, she starts thinking of black sheep as her friend and it’s an exciting enough thought that she’s got a little smile on her face next time black sheep slips into the seat next to her in professor maelstrom’s class

and at some point julia stops being just julia to black sheep, and starts being jules because we’re in a school for thieves, but we’ve already got plenty of ~jules~ right here and thats sincerely the worst joke i’ve ever heard and oh really ~jules~? bet i could find an even worse one

and like all the usual stuff is still happening in the background — shadowsan-black sheep rivalry, gray and the Squad being black sheep’s friends, the phone and player, etc.

its just that now, black sheep has a bit of a calming influence and that does help!

and they work well enough that most people assume that julia and black sheep will be partners after graduation 

even crackle acknowledges it — despite the jealousy he feels at the knowledge

so things continue and all this happens, but then comes finals.

things go the same. black sheep gets perfect scores in all of her exams, except stealth 101

julia — now the historian — can’t help but check for whether black sheep graduated too and just as she does, she hears crackle say it: she didn’t pass

and she wants to go to black sheep and ask if she’s okay because everyone knows how much black sheep’s wanted this, how much she’s been working for it, but by the time gray’s been dragged off by tigress, black sheep has disappeared and julia has no idea where she’s gone

so she waits for a bit in the cafeteria and in the dorms and anywhere else she thinks that black sheep would be and she sees… nothing

and about twelve hours after the results, the faculty pulls her for her first mission (for context, this is before the whole,,, hear the true name of vile thing) which is basically being a plant for the morocco mission, by pretending to be an archaeology phd student from oxford who’s come to study the findings in the excavation

and she’s busy enough with that that she barely gets to think about black sheep or graduation or anything other than the near-overwhelming anxiety that comes with the horrifying ordeal of potentially being Known but she just manages to figure out like,,, guard rotations, as well as the exact objects that are at the site for the vile squad to steal

and then she’s out before they even get there — julia’s pattern recognition and historical knowledge made her pretty useful when it comes to planning capers so it meant that she’s always travelling around the world ahead of each caper, but would also make her a pretty invaluable asset to vile, so they can’t afford to get her caught

julia doesnt hear about black sheep nearly messing up morocco until much later, and even then, she doesn’t have all the info

all she can do is wonder why the hell the faculty would fail someone who somehow managed to sneak out of vile island without anyone realising until much later

and yes, maybe a part of her misses her old partner, but she knows that it wouldn’t matter anyway — she was the mole, and she’d barely get to work directly with carmen so.

but then cut to a year later, when a vile counterfeit operation in boston is suddenly sabotaged

cut to the moment when, julia, despite not having seen her in a year, is still able to somehow recognise black sheep’s work

its Slick. its the Slickness that tips her off, and part of her is reluctant to tell the faculty who it is, but her allegiance demands it and she tells the faculty and she hates herself for it when she sees the murderous rage on each of their faces

and somehow, that — her ability to recognise this carmen sandiego — gets her in a new position, as a mole in interpol, passing on the information they get as they try to track the scarlet super thief as well

and then one day, in poitiers, julia sees her

its black sheep. it’s undeniably black sheep under that red trench coat and julia wants to go and talk to her capture her and bring her in to vile but her new partner ~chase devineaux~ is everything that once made her turn away from her interest in law enforcement and he orders her to call for backup while he tries to stroke his own ego

she does, of course, but maybe she delays it a bit, if only because she’d rather let carmen sandiego get away than have devineaux’s ego get any bigger

and the rest of the season goes much the same except after julia ends up in acme, she reports to vile about everything that’s going on, and they no longer suspect devineaux of helping carmen etc etc

and she can’t help but somewhat sympathise with what carmen’s doing — she’s returning invaluable historical artefacts and julia’s always loved history and- it’s just… altruistic. and that’s admirable. and that’s the only reason i feel so torn about helping vile. that’s it, that’s the only reason.

and then comes the chasing paper caper

what was originally the first real conversation between julia and carmen goes completely differently

(note that most vile operative outside of jules’ graduating class do not know of her existence bc she barely interacts with most of them since she’s more a spy/mole who’s out of the picture by the time anyone else gets on the scene)

carmen still needs to be able to spy on paper star without anyone noticing, so she still goes for the seat right in front of the cute short-haired girl sitting alo- and oh my god jules?

and its the first time julia has heard that nickname in over a year and oh God they were just friends this should Not hit this hard what the Heck

and carmen still sits down and just quietly grills her as to what the hell is going on bc she Knows that jules is a always a mole and never an active part of a caper and she doesn’t?? understand??

and jules is kind of in a daze, but she’s been Trained so she feeds carmen her cover story:

she defected from vile when she saw how they were treating historical artefacts — melting down gold, selling priceless works of art to the highest bidder, etc. etc. — and that since then she’s been silently helping interpol with taking down vile ops, etc.

and it takes a bit but carmen kind of starts to believe it — she knows julia loves history with all her heart, and she’s… well, she’s never been the kind of recruit that carmen’s expected to see in vile anyway, so. it’s not out of the realm of possibility, is it, for julia to be a defector working against vile? after all, isn’t she the same?

so she starts looking around, while waiting for paper star to make a move, and she ends up noticing the briefcase in the seat next to her, and for some reason, those initials — clearly chase devineaux — make her want to scowl

“new partner?” “oh… its… well, work. work... partner” “oh.”

uhhh anyway i might actually. write this? idk don’t count on anything lmaooo.

[bubblesgoboink]

everybody loves you

paring: movie-star!ransom x actress!fem-reader

word count: 1.5k+

summary: she doesn't like that anyone would die to feel his touch because she wants to be his gold rush.

WARNINGS: drinking, fluff-ish

The sound of champagne flutes clinking paired with indiscernible conversations and laughter floated around the room while she mingled. While discussions with castmates, crew workers, writers, and reputable directors flowed, her feet were getting achier, and a mild tension headache was building from her temples. Taking a deep breath, she excused herself from an animated conversation about the latest Hollywood affair and its politics alongside the movie release starring the couple. On a good day, she would have entertained the conversation while politely attempting to steer it in a different direction, but today wasn't one of those days, the champagne was too sweet, borderline frat party punch, and the air was too stuffy. Placing her fourth empty glass on a server's tray, she slinked out of the room to the nearest balcony.

Cool night air caressed her bare shoulders and combed through her loose hair as her eyes swept the yellow-hued illuminated city. In the serene moment, she felt the adrenaline of many months of shooting seep out of her and trickle back into the party, where it belonged. This wasn't her scene; it wasn't anyone's scene. Despite the excitement radiating from every person's hand that she shook in that room, she felt the exhaustion of the castmates from early shoots, the crew workers from setting up and cleaning up after hours every day, the writers from putting their hearts in their hand and their pens to paper, and the directors who made sure every word of the script was done justice on the big screen.

A flurry of camera shutter sounds and eager photographers shouting brought her out of her trance. She peered over the edge of the balcony and observed the scene unfolding at the entrance. One look at the sleek black BMW, and she knew who the chauffeur would reveal when he opened the door. Glancing back at the party, she sighed knowing the level of schmoozing in the joint was going to increase once the man in the car stepped in rapidly. Stubbornly she refused to step back in and be a part of the atmosphere that would exponentially boost his ego. The chatter swelled from below the balcony, and against her better judgment, she glanced over.

Even at over an hour late, photographers looked at Hugh Ransom Drysdale like he was the answer to all their editorial wishes. Fitted in a deep maroon Dolce and Gabbana tux with material that looked like mohair and leather dress shoes embossed with the double Gucci G's on the sides, he faced the left, favoring the right side of his face and aimed a smirk at the largest camera of the bunch.

Taking a few steps down the red carpet, he ran a hand through his perfectly quaffed hair, leaving a single strand to linger over his temple while the rest fell right back into place. How he managed to look sleek and expensive while maintaining a grounded "I just woke up like this" vibe was beyond her, but she would never say that to his Adonis-like face.

A chorus of, "Thank you, Ransom", rang across the rope line as he reached the end of the carpet. With a quick eyebrow flicker and a cocky half-grin, he acknowledged the crowd and headed inside. She scoffed and ran a hand through her hair, huffing irritably as the front strands fell awkwardly into her face and not elegantly like Ransom's. A drink sounded good right about now, but if she went in, she'd have to face the music that was Ransom's siren song, ignoring the possible repercussions she made her decision.

Slipping back into the room, she walked the perimeter of the room, hoping to avoid getting sucked into a conversation on her way to the open bar.

"Can I get a to-go cup full of the Pinot Noir?" The bartender raised his eyebrows in mild concern at the strange order but moved to grab the wine and a paper cup.

"Would you like ice in this?" He snarkily quipped as if to imply that someone who was unsophisticated enough to order wine in a to-go cup wouldn't know that ice diluted the full-bodied notes of the wine.

"Is that the Belle Glos Pinot Noir from the Russian River Valley because in that case, I would-"

"No, she won't have ice in that. Pour it into a glass for me, will you? And you, what are you doing ordering red wine in a to-go cup like some kind of broke alcoholic college student?" Ransom smiled smugly at her like he just saved her from a career-ending scandal. She glared up at him, accidentally making direct eye contact with his stupidly pretty ocean eyes. She let her eyes trace his clean-shaven jaw down to his disgustingly broad shoulders. How the hell could someone look so broad in a blazer? He chuckled knowingly as she "discreetly" checked him out.

"Are you done yet?" She wanted so badly to wipe that smug look off his face. Ransom Drysdale not looking smug was nearly impossible. She remembers the time he took one too many steps back and fell into the pool, shirt, jeans, shoes, and all, and didn't look the least bit embarrassed, whereas she fled the scene out of second-hand embarrassment.

Looking him dead in the eye, "Put the wine back in the cup, with ice, please." Narrowing her eyes, she shoved a finger against his chest, "My wine, my choice." She could tell from the way his jaw clenched he was getting irritated with her bit.

"Darling, you don't know-"

"Ah, there you are, Ransom. Have I introduced you to my wife Mrs. Edwards?" The older lady grasped Ransom's hand that he'd robotically stuck out as he's been conditioned to greet people at such large gatherings with both of her hands and tugged him towards her, placing obnoxiously loud air kisses on either side of his face.

From her angle perched on the barstool, she could spy the grimace on Ransom’s face as the lady gushed in a thick British accent about his latest film and how captivated she was by the chemistry he had with his costar.

“You didn’t tell me your wife was so charming. I might have to steal her after this”, Ransom stage-whispered to the director. Mrs. Edwards let out a raucous laugh and placed her hand on Ransom’s bicep while he joined in her laughter with deep chuckles of his own.

“Ransom was an absolute pleasure to work with on this film and so was his costar-” As if on cue, there was an audible sound of someone chewing ice behind them. The director and his wife turned around at the sound to find, said costar sheepishly grinning at them while holding a styrofoam cup in her hand. She placed the cup on the bar, stood up, and straightened her dress to appear somewhat professional and held out a hand to Mrs. Edwards.

But before she could introduce herself, Mrs. Edwards cut in, “Is that wine in a take-out cup? That reminds me of my college days, such good times. Especially because I met this one.” Mrs. Edwards giggled and gently bumped her husband’s shoulder. “You’re absolutely adorable, sweetie.” She politely smiled at the director’s wife and started a conversation with her about behind the scenes on set and all the little quirks her husband had while he was directing. While Mrs. Edwards was speaking about a trip she’d taken to Australia with her husband where he nearly lost a limb near the dingo enclosure, she felt a warm hand placed on the small of her back. She side-eyed Ransom only to find that he had been inconspicuously tugging her into his side during the conversation, she was practically standing with her back pressed against his chest.

Mr. Edwards checked his watch before wrapping an arm around his wife’s waist. “We should go now. We only planned on dropping by for a couple minutes but then I saw my boy Ransom and just had to stop by and say hi. Also, we have a dinner in a week to discuss the possibility of a sequel.”

“Oh look at them. They’re practically cuddling.” Mrs. Edwards pointed out to her husband.

“I simply can’t help not being close to her. It’s like muscle memory from our days on set.” Ransom smoothly responded as he ran his hand up and down her back in soothing motions. Mrs. Edwards smiled knowingly and reached over to interlace her fingers with her husbands. Another round of air kisses and the Edwards left the premise.

She turned on Ransom as soon as they left, furious. “I’m not a prop for you to earn some brownie points with.”

He poked her chest lightly with his index finger and leaned down, brushing her nose with his. “It’s good press for the movie, sweetheart. Don’t get ahead of yourself. See you at the dinner.” He tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her ear, finger softly caressing the side of her cheek. Her eyes reflexively fluttered shut as she leaned into his exuding warmth.

The air suddenly turned cold and when she opened her eyes, he was already being whisked off to another conversation leaving her with nothing but a styrofoam cup in one hand and the dizzying scent of his woodsy cologne dancing around her.

-

a/n: this is probably gonna be a three part series bc that's how i planned it but since when do i adhere to my plans. hope you enjoyed! :)

[muwur]

Since requests were open I was wondering if I could request father headcanons for iwai + ushi + atsumu 🥺 btw your writing is vv tasty n I can’t wait to see you write more !! Keep up the good work n stay safe !!

haikyuu daddee headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for iwaizumi, ushijima, and atsumu

❧ gn reader

✎ 1.4k words

a/n: omg u called my writing taSTY Dx i cri tySM 💞 that is a high compliment for me AHAHAHAH ILY and ty for the request! 

also my lovelies i m back i m sry i was gone so long feojfe i miss yall <3 here u go enjoi, this was fun to write lmk if yall want more characetrs AHAHA

current listen: accidentally in love by sHREK AAHAH jkjk i mean counting crows, they cant take that away from me by ella fitzgerald and louis armstrong, love the way you lie by eminem and rihanna

requests: open!

iwaizumi

✧ prePARED daddy

✧ picked up on this parenting thing p fast, also does a lot of research so he’s ready to face any situation

✧ teaches his kids how to behave n respect others

✧ also makes sure they know not to talk to strangers and teaches them some self defense

✧ be warned these kids are packing a surprise can of whOOP ASS,, dont fuck w them,, plus u wouldnt want buff daddee iwa on ur tail

✧ honestly his kids would be ANGELS ,,, n thats cuz he treats them all so w e l l

✧ mans is ATTENTIVE. he asks his kids about their days, their interests, and encourages discussion about their fEELINGS 🥺

✧ always offers them really valuable and light-hearted advice

✧ and gives them the love and transparency we all wanted but never had--

✧ however his kids are easily (n negatively) influenced esp when uncle oikawa comes to visit--

✧ but mostly bc iwa gets annoyed and slips out a lot of curse words and a “shittykawa” and then his kids started calling oikawa that and now it’s ingrained in them forever fjoefefgfvi (*distant phlattykawa crying noises*)

✧ gives them LOTS of head pats and ruffles as signs of affection

✧ PACKS THEIR SCHOOL LUNCHES and ensures they eat a balanced meal

✧ attends all their games/events,, will get a bit rowdy hype them up

✧ def lets his kids sleep with him when they’re having a bad night or woke up scared from a nightmare (and waits for them to fall asleep before going to sleep himself fojref)

✧ when they were babies he usually succeeded to get them to stop crying by pulling funny faces, showing them their favorite cartoons, or humming a lullaby

✧ when they get older,,, u bet iwa would be suPER protective esp when their kids start being iNtErEsTeD in other people

✧ you: “iwaizumi, they seem like a really nice kid, though”

✧ iwa: *sitting with you in the car, across the street from the ice cream parlor your child said they were at, and spying from the window* “you can’t trust everyone, of course they seem ‘nice,’ they just want our approval”

✧ definitely did not interrupt his child’s potential first kiss at their house’s doorstep by slamMINg the door open “sUDDENLY” cuz he “hEard TheIR vOicEs and THougHt TO lET them In”

✧ effectively traumatized both kids

✧ tho he felt bad after n u made him go apologize so he did (and he was forgiven, only if he agreed to never spy on them again--)

✧ doesn’t stop him from scrutinizing every person yalls kid introduces to you tho

✧ overall a super supportive dad, 11/10

ushijima

✧ ok dEF does not know much about parenting ,, at first

✧ stared at his child like ???nani when you both changed their first diaper

✧ also had plenty of staring contests with his babies ,,, called it bonding

✧ was curious and tasted baby food once,,, immediately regretted it

✧ once put a volleyball next to his child, who attempted to bite it, and took it as a sign that they liked it

✧ after sum time n practice, his mind becomes split between “how to volleyball” and “how to dad”

✧ catch him in the kitchen wearing an apron and whipping up his kids’ favorite smiley face pancakes 😤😤

✧ has an amazing ability to get his kids to stop crying, does really simple things like give them their favorite toy or place a gentle hand on their hand or attend to their needs (mans can tell if they want food or needa poop) and they calm down immediately

✧ carried them on his shoulders once and now they never stop asking him for shoulder rides (not that he minds anyway)

✧ if theres two kids he can probs carry one on each shoulder cuz cmon ,,, have u seen this man

✧ always goes to every performance/game/event his child takes part in

✧ man smiles so soft™ when he goes to the 1st grade play and sees his kid’s name in the program next to their role as “townsperson b” (next year, they upgraded to “singing carrot” in a play about the food pyramid)

✧ if his kid ends up enjoying volleyball, he will teach them e v e r y t h i n g they need to know

✧ but is overall super supportive of anything else his child pursues and doesn’t push anything onto them, would rather let them choose what they want to do

✧ had n o idea what to do when his kid asked him about the birds n the bees asfghkl

✧ couldnt sleep one night thinking about it and just randomly asks you while yall laying in bed in the dARk like “so our child asked me how babies are made and I told them they came from watermelon seeds” (you: 👁️👄👁️ “come again”)

✧ you: *at the grocery store with your child*

✧ child: *hands you watermelon* “I want a little brother!”

✧ you: “haha of course honey” 👁️👄👁️ what do i do (*later to ushijima* “duhfojhguf we needa get another baby i promised our child a younger brother fohurof” ; ushi: “wat” ; you: “itS YOUR FAULT”)

✧ yall eventually tell them not every watermelon can produce babies only really special ones that are really hard to get fhuoefkfotfi theyre not ready for the truth

✧ another great daddee, we stan

atsumu

✧ knew parenting was stressful esp with bABieS but was like eh it cant be that bad right

✧ think again

✧ g o o d b y e  s l e e p

✧ develops phat bags under his eyes, responds with a weak “aha im fine just that parenting life and the kids ykNOW” whenever his teammates ask if he’s oKAY

✧ tried to tempt his kids to eat their mush baby food by trying it himself, nearly gagged but was able to say “eughh yuMM”

✧ loves to lift them high up in the air, even throws them up a little and nearly drops them (yall almost died from feAR but babie was having so much fun,,, yall agreed to be just a bit more careful)

✧ rlly bad at getting them to stop crying, gets very stressed when he’s exhausted every option he can think of then calls you over for some help/advice (you: *immediately calms them down* ; ratsumu: “how--”)

✧ calls up osamu a lot to ask him how to make food ,, then simps whenever his twin brother comes over and the kids are in love with this man and his cooking (”dad why cant you make stuff as yummy as this”)

✧ very affectionate with his kids, gives them lots of hugs and kisses on the forehead

✧ plays with them a lot! whether it’s sports, just dance, animal crossing, or UNO, yOU NAME IT WE PLAY IT

✧ also has no mercy when playing competitive video or board games,, has made them cry more than once LOL

✧ so sometimes he toned it down n let them win,, until his kids actually got better and DEMOLISH him every time

✧ is cool with his kids cursing, just as long as they don’t do it in front of their teachers LMAO

✧ plays innocent when he gets a call from school saying his kid was using ‘inappropriate language’ and is like “whaaat? my child? im not even sure where they learned that, maybe check if the other kids in class are saying those things, too--”

✧ reminisces how much nicer his kids were to him when they were younger and all the time they spent together,,, bc now that they reached their tEeNS they want alone time

✧ wants to be B) cool dad so he tries kinda hard, esp in front of their friends but his kid’s just like dad pls dofjrgjigtgro

✧ also very supportive of whatever his kids want to pursue and dedicates time to help them in whatever ways he can (whether that be to help them practice, make sure he can provide transportation, get them supplies, etc)

✧ always playfully competing with you to see who’s the “better” parent (you win by default)

✧ PROTECTIVE dad and will easily intimidate ANYONE who crosses his kids

✧ takes sum adjustment and mental resilience but daddee atsumu perseveres  😤 absolutely loves his kids and would do anything for them  

[expectingtofly]

Because I Like You

632 words

romantic fluff, post 15x20 (canon divergent bc the canon sucks), established dean/cas, human cas

also on ao3

Day 3 of @bend-me-shape-me‘s SPN Advent Calendar 2020 prompts

“Home sweet home,” Dean joked when he opened the motel room door and flicked on the lights. He dropped his duffel bag onto a small table which wobbled unsteadily. “Damn, it’s been a while since we stayed in a motel.”

“Yes,” Castiel agreed, shutting the door behind him and looking around. “They are...” he poked at a curling piece of wallpaper, “less than ideal.”

“Yeah, this one is pretty crappy.” One queen-sized bed with a hideous purple, floral comforter. Blue and yellow striped wallpaper that’d clearly seen better days. Water stains on the popcorn ceiling. “Kinda nostalgic though.” Castiel looked at him curiously. “I mean, just because Sam, Dad, and I lived from motel to motel for so long.”

Castiel nodded. “It’s nostalgic for me too. I spent many nights watching over you in rooms like these.”

“How many nights are we talking?” Castiel looked sheepish. “Don’t tell me you were spying on me and Sam all the time without us knowing.”

“No…” Castiel draped his trenchcoat over the chair next to the table. “Not all the time.”

Smiling, Dean shook his head and sat on the bed, which squeaked indignantly. “God, Cas. You’re a creep.”

“I was an angel!” Castiel protested. “It was my duty.” 

He set his bag down by the bed and Dean pulled him to stand between his knees. “I’ll give you a pass because I like you and because I know you had a crush on me.”

“I was following orders from Heaven, Dean,” Castiel said haughtily, but he twined their fingers together. “Besides, you liked me too. Even if it took you an embarrassingly long time to admit it.” 

“Look who’s talking,” Dean retorted before throwing Castiel's own words from so long ago back at him, “You know, I dragged you from the Empty, I can throw you back in.”

Castiel burst out laughing, but he took the bait, stepping closer and growing serious as he cradled Dean’s chin to make Dean look up at him. “I’d like to see you try.”

And angel or not, Dean could swear he saw lightning flash in Castiel’s eyes. 

 After letting Castiel prove that, despite giving up his grace to become human, he was still as formidable as ever, they showered and piled into bed. Turning on the TV, Dean scrolled through the channels. Castiel curled up against him, head resting on Dean’s stomach. He groaned when Dean paused on Dr. Sexy, M.D.

“Come on, you love this show,” Dean said. “And it’s the holiday special.” As was evident by the Christmas hats the staff were wearing over their scrubs. He wasn’t sure how hygienic that was.

“You have horrible taste in television," Castiel complained.

“What do you know? You only just started appreciating Scooby Doo. And that’s a classic.” He gestured to the TV. “They hung mistletoe over the operating room door. If this isn’t quality TV, I don’t know what is.”

“Fine,” Castiel sighed, shifting to wrap one arm around Dean’s waist. “But only because I like you.”

Dean grinned. They fell into an easy silence, Castiel’s weight on him comforting, every rise and fall of Castiel’s chest grounding.  For not the first time, he marveled at how lucky he was—to have this, to have Castiel with him alive and breathing.  He slipped a hand under Castiel’s t-shirt to feel the warmth of his bare skin under his palm. 

The Dr. Sexy holiday special ended and Dean switched off the TV.

“Cas?” he asked quietly, looking down. He smiled at seeing Castiel conked out. It was still an unfamiliar sight, a former angel sleeping, but it was one he loved. If anyone deserved some rest, it was Castiel.

Gently, he pushed Castiel’s still damp hair out of his eyes. “I’ll watch over you,” he whispered.

Tag List

@becky-srs @xojo @marvelnaturalock @cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you @aelysianmuse @prayedtoyou @letsjustdieeveryone @spookyskeletonsandallthezombies @good-things-do-happen-dean @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @theninthdutchessofhell @madronasky @famouspsychicpizzabandit @multifandomdisorder

I’ll be writing more holiday fluff this month and have other fics in the works, so let me know (message, ask, comment) if you’d like to be tagged in my other destiel fics or removed from the list :) 

[unstoppableforcce]

dark side

CHAPTER EIGHT: a slip

pairing: Javier Peña x reader

previous part | next part | masterlist

a/n: okay i had this queued to go up during my vacation but then it didn’t post (no surprise there lol) but it’s okay! bc i didn’t like it much anyways and this version is so much better now honestly (so tumblr saved me lol)

its still short bc I cut it in half so i can post this and simultaneously work on the next part !! maybe next part tomorrow night? I don’t want to get hopes up but maybe !! thanks for being so patient w me guys !!

It was a slip right?

The words repeated over and over again in his head and for minutes he just stood there with the phone in his hand, long after you had already ended the call, letting them repeat. They bounced around like an echo between his ears, hitting every inch of his head. It was the only thing he could focus on. 

But it was a slip, wasn’t it? A simple slip of the tongue. 

At least, that was what he tried to tell himself to steal even the tiniest bit of focus back. He had work to focus on, finding Christina to focus on... he had to hang up the phone and get on a plane. He had to focus on something other than you, and to do that, he had to tell himself that it was a slip and that it was meaningless. 

It was meaningless, like telling your waiter at a restaurant that they should enjoy their meal as well. Just a slip.

Meaningless.

And for the first few hours, that worked. It got him back on the plane, it got him thinking about getting Christina back and getting Jurado’s testimony. It got him back focusing on his work, prioritizing it over you like he was supposed to do. Work was supposed to come first, that was the whole basis for your relationship. 

This was just the first time it felt wrong... No, it was the first time he admitted it did. 

There were plenty of times that came before where his heart weighed heavy having to put you at arm’s distance to protect his work. That morning in the shower, as your hands cascaded with the hot water down his skin, your eyes just pleaded to help him, to alleviate the heavy stress... but he put work first. That night, after the Ambassador’s drink party, when he started asking you about work, putting his job before your’s and your loyalty, he put work first. The day he caught one of the god father’s and you paid the price, suffering in the shouting match delivered by Stechner while he kept his mouth shut about your arrangement, he put his work first. 

And it had felt wrong every time, but it was only very recently that he figured out why. 

It was because even though you ended whatever things were between the two of you before he left for Curaçao, he loved you. It was because now, even after fighting through the new pain of heartbreak inflicted by another, he loved you. 

It was because for the first time in his entire life, he loved someone and they said it back. For the first time, he wanted them to say it back. For the first time, there was no obligation, no sense of doing it because it was the right thing to do or because that was what was expected of you. For the first time, someone told them they loved him because they meant it, because you meant it. 

Even if it was just a meaningless slip. 

But who was he kidding? Putting work before his feelings for you, trying to pretend that it was just some meaningless slip... it just wouldn’t work. 

The problem was that he knew better. He knew you better.

Part of it was the creeping memories of his psychology degree from what felt like a whole lifetime ago, part of it was just the fact that he knew you too well. 

Slips weren’t meaningless and you were too careful for anything you did to be meaningless.

Slips came out when they were practiced phrases. Telling your waiter to enjoy their meal as well was a practiced phrase, maybe not meant for your waiter, but practiced on your tongue nonetheless. That’s why they came out, they were practiced.

And he heard almost all your phone calls.

You were practically living with him for a few weeks, he heard your phone calls even if he didn’t listen to them, and you never told anyone you loved them over the phone. So it couldn’t have been practiced in that way. The only way it could have been practiced was if you were thinking it, over and over again, the same way he was.

It didn’t matter that you were exhausted, that whatever was happening at work was weighing you down so far that you snapped and broke up with him... none of that mattered. Because a slip doesn’t put words in your mouth that you wouldn’t say naturally. 

It wasn’t meaningless. It couldn’t be, not with you. If it slipped from your lips, it was because you meant it. 

And he couldn’t get it out of his head, no matter how hard he tried or pretended he had. Work had to come first and all he could think about was you, the quick words playing over and over again in his head.

“Bye, love you”, “Bye, love you”, “Bye, love you”, “Bye, love you--

Fuck. He loved you and goddamn, maybe you loved him too.

And maybe none of it mattered because work had to come first. He had to find Christina, he had to focus.

As his plane slowed to a stop on the runway adjacent to the embassy, he quickly jumped up, grabbing his bag and moving to the door, ready to burst out the second they let him. He had his focus back for a minute and he needed to ride it as far as he could take it.

He just didn’t know that it would only take him a few steps onto the runway, finding you dressed in your street clothes, crossing over from the opposite direction with a file in your hand.

He froze on the spot, letting the gusts of wind that fought by dishevel his hair without second thought. You were all that he could see. 

He never saw you in your street clothes, or at least, he hadn’t since the first night he met you. It was just pant suits and sometimes nothing at all. But now, you were just wearing jeans and a tee shirt, your hair blowing in the same blustering wind that threatened to push him over as he stood caught, like a deer in the headlights.  

Immediately, his brain started up again, accelerated, like the beating of his heart. 

He loved you. You loved him. He loved you. You loved him—

He couldn’t do this right now. He had to focus. 

Shaking his head in a way that surely looked like he was trying to save his hair from the wind, he tried to shake the thoughts from his head. And by the looks of it, you were fighting a similar onslaught of thoughts. 

But by the time you crossed the runway to meet his frozen form, you had picked the line of focus you were going in on and it wasn’t the slip you had made over the phone. With your stern face and file in hand, it was clearly work that you had chosen as well.

“I found her.” You shouted slightly to counteract the loud wind that whipped around the two of you. 

It wasn’t as easy a fight for him to overcome now that you were in front of him though. As you passed the file to him, he couldn’t help but spend an extra half-second mesmerized by you and your ability to do your job. He had called you what? a few hours ago and you had already found her? Even if being a blonde white girl in Colombia was like wearing a tracker, it was still impressive work that you had done for him. 

Work you had done because he asked... No. He stopped himself quickly. This was about finding Christina, not the fact that you had done it for him. 

He flipped open the file, not hesitating on the fact that it was a CIA file but fighting the wind to keep the papers from flying away. “Where is she?”

“FARC has her in a jungle stronghold.” You explained, stepping up closer to him to point at the picture paper-clipped to the bottom of the file.

It was definitely her, filthy and restrained, newspaper in her hand and the barrel of a gun pressed up under her chin. This was his fault. All of it. Getting her involved and now you... he couldn’t shake this feeling that something was going to go terribly wrong. 

But he also couldn’t linger on just a feeling. This was his job, he had to get her back. 

“You’ve got coordinates?” He asked, glancing up from the file’s top edge to find your stare directed down to your feet. Immediately, his heart dropped a similar distance. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s... look, it’s complicated.” You huffed, settling your hands up onto your hips as you brought your eyes back up to meet his. “You’ll need an army to get her back, the Ambassador won’t give it to you and I can’t either...”

He flipped a page in the file almost subconsciously, glancing down from your hesitant frame to find an all too familiar name scribbled at the top in red pen and your handwriting.

The Castaño Brothers.

“They’re CIA sponsored communist killers, two of Stechner’s contacts but I can’t get you a meeting because—”

“Fuck.” He huffed, shutting the file as it all caught up to him.

The interruption caught you off guard though, your face twisting slightly as you asked back to him, “what?”

This was what he hated about being in Colombia nowadays. It was his history, it was the blood that coated his hands, ten layers deep. 

He couldn’t stop himself from wondering if you knew or not. He got your file the first day he was truly introduced to you, but did you get his? You had to, right? Your whole job was to spy on him, how were you supposed to do that if Stechner didn’t fill you in on exactly what he was? 

He wasn’t the hero the embassy hailed him to be. He was just a man who wasn’t afraid to get his hands dirty to bring down Escobar. 

Did you know? Did it matter if you did? 

The more he thought about it, the more he realized those two questions had very different answers. 

You had to have known. If it wasn’t in his file, you had to have heard from everyone else around the Embassy. Hell, Stechner probably went out of his way to fill you in on his dirty past the day he assigned you to him. 

And that first night? You had to have seen it in him when you agreed to take him home with you. 

The guilt in his eyes... the pain that he wore just beneath the surface... the weight that sat so heavily on his shoulders...It was everything he saw in you, everything that drew him to you in the first place. The familiarity of everything about you.

Did it matter if you did know?

Looking at you now, as the woman he loved, he wanted to say yes because he wanted to be a good man in your eyes, he wanted to be a man worthy of your love but if he was being honest with himself... it didn’t matter at all. 

He had seen the scars on your body. He had hear rumors around the embassy as to why your file was as redacted as it was. 

There was talk about explosions and spying and foreign governments and... and maybe none of it was true but he saw the same guilt in your eyes that he saw in his own when he looked in the mirror. He saw you trying to do good with every girl being trafficked that you tried to hunt down the same way he tried to do good by bringing down the godfather’s of Cali. He saw a familiar weight resting on your shoulders as he massaged the sore kinks from your muscles laying in bed at night. 

It didn’t matter what either of you had done, you were both in the same boat and he knew that from the first second he laid eyes on you. 

You had a dark side just like he did, and he didn’t care about yours so why would his matter to you?

“I know them.” He admitted carefully, looking up to meet your stare and gauge your reaction. And when you held it back with equally as careful, he felt just enough ease to continue. “I can get their help.”

When your head gave a quick but approving nod, he felt the smallest release of tension in his shoulders. He had your trust, he could relax in that respect. The rest of the tension held though, because now he had to walk head first into the dark past he swore to himself that he left behind as he came back to Colombia. 

And he had to bring you with him. 

“Where do we find them?”

—

“What do pretty girls like you eat? Hmm? The picada here is the shit, I can get you a plate.”

“Oh, I’m on a strict diet of lots of coffee and not taking shit from people.”

Any fear he had about bringing you along to meet with Don Berna had flown out the open windows of the restaurant the instant you sat down next to him at the table, taking up a space equal to him as you spread your legs and you leaned back.

Your quick wit, your smart mouth... he had to stop and wonder for a second why he had even been afraid in the first place. 

Narcos may not have been your game, but you weren’t new to the world of terrible yet powerful men. If anything, you had been dealing with them for longer than you had even been with the CIA. And you were good at it. 

Your smart mouth was enough to bring a hefty chuckle to Berna’s chest as he ate, enough to shake the table slightly and even more when he let his fist fall to the wood to grab the bottle in front of him. 

“I like her, Peña.” He minded as he washed down his food with a swig from the bottle, shifting his disgusting stare off of you and back to the suited DEA hero sitting next to you. “You should bring her every time.”

Every time? Like this was some weekly regular meeting? God, Javi forgot just how much he hated this. 

“Can you help us or not?” He quickly moved to refocus the conversation, leaning forward just enough to level his strict stare with the large man and settle his elbows on the table.

“Can I help you find your barbie doll? Easily.” Berna spoke with an nonchalant shrug as he reached for his drink again and downed a solid swig to wash out the barely chewed food that his mouth was stuffed with. But once the shrug fell and the food was swallowed, his head tilted much more playfully than either you or Javi could take comfort in. “Can you afford my price... maybe not so easy.”

You glanced to Javi in the same second he glanced to you, but the words fell from your lips first. “What’s the price?”

“A promise.”

The two of you didn’t need to verbally urge him to continue, your furrowed brows took care of that for you. Berna took another few bites, then another drink, then sat back with his napkin in hand and continued.

“One day, my name will pop up on the DEA’s to-do list, and all you have to promise me you’ll do, is give me a phone call.”

You scoffed at that, just loud enough to get the few guards who waited a few feet away to turn and look at the obvious show of disrespect. Thankfully, Berna just seemed amused by it, laughing into his meal. But Javi didn’t have the guts you had to back your brazenness, not as he began considering what that really meant. 

“A get out of jail free card?” He repeated back carefully in English as he drew his arms back to cross over his chest, leaving you leaned forward on the table. 

But again, Berna just shrugged, “Exactly.”

You glanced back to Javi, maybe in a look of commiseration or maybe to try and warn him against what you had to be sure he was going to do. Whatever look it was, he didn’t hold your stare long enough to decipher it. He didn’t have the luxury to let you get into his head right now. 

Because maybe you’d try to change his mind and he couldn’t afford that. 

He needed to get Christina back and you had made it clear on the runway that this was your only chance to get to FARC in the jungle and get her out safely. He knew you were too good at your job to not have found an easier way if one existed so that left this as his only option. Whatever Don Berna wanted, he was going to get and he knew it. 

That was why he looked so damn smug as he pestered with and easy, “Agent Peña?”

It was a promise to break the law, but what was his defense? Tell him ‘no, I know I did that for you in the past but not anymore’? It just wouldn’t work. Berna knew he was desperate because he was desperate. 

He liked to think that you’d do the same if you were in his shoes, he liked to think that you wouldn’t judge him for it. 

And as he looked back to meet the stare you passed him that he had carefully avoided, he found you already looking to the table in front of you, like you knew his answer before he had even come close to admitting it aloud. 

Either because you knew him that well or because that was what you would do and you couldn’t blame him for doing the same. 

“Fine. You have a deal.”

“Then lets go kill some communists.” Berna bellowed out loudly, earning a few chuckles from his men who stood around.

And you couldn’t help but laugh at that too. Not because killing communists was something you relished in, quite the opposite actually. 

You were surely laughing because of that day you spent in the jungle with him. The day you told him you didn’t come to Colombia for drugs or communism. 

Yet here you were. 

If he had the heart to laugh, maybe he would have mustered on as well at the irony of it all. Instead, he stood up with you and everything quickly got started. 

Before the two of you knew it, you were both dressed in green fatigues, loaded into the helicopter and headed off towards the jungle as you continued to fight off Berna’s comments.

“So, if you’re not DEA, what part of the gringo government can handle you?” He mocked playfully, practically licking his lips as he watched you lean forward to fix your feet in your boots.

“What makes you think anyone can handle me?” You easily retorted, growing a smirk on Javi’s face that he struggled to hide.

Berna was equally as amused, chuckling with each and every smart remark you mustered.

And it just kept going.

“Did he find you in a brothel? You know how he likes his brothels and hell, I know plenty of men who would pay for someone like you.”

Javi sent him a warning glare but you weren’t deterred.

“There isn’t enough money in the Narco world.”

“You’d be surprised, sweetheart.”

Eventually, you just rolled your eyes and switched off your headset and about a half hour later, the three of you ended up deep in the jungle, unloading night vision goggles for the Castano’s with ease.

You looked oddly comfortable in the green fatigues, strapping on a bullet proof vest, and loading your weapon.

He knew it was because underneath the sullen spy exterior you put on for work, and the sexy smirk you wore as you straddled him in his bedroom, you were a soldier. That’s what you had been before all of this.

And for the briefest of seconds, he couldn’t help but wonder what it would have been like to meet you in that phase of your life.

Without Colombia weighing down on his shoulders, when he was still just a simple DEA agent back in the states, would he have stumbled into you in a bar while you were on leave? Would it have been the sense of a dark familiarity in your bones that drew him to you on one of his darkest nights, haunted by the phantom bloodied hand as he sipped his whiskey, or would it have been your buoyant smile and the sway of your hips?

Would you love him all the same? Would your unscarred bodies feel as right as they did now, slotted against each other as your lips danced over his?

Was he glad that he met you now, because it gave him the chance to know you at all, or did he want you without all of Colombia, without the war and the work and Stechner and your job and his...

Did he want you as a respite from the darkness that haunted him at night or did he want you for you?

The longer he stared at you across the table while you prepared for the incursion, the more he realized that it had started out as a simple reprieve from work and the stress that came with it but that wasn’t what it was anymore. Whether you broke up with him or not. He loved you. Not for your work, though your competency certainly was a turn on, but just for you.

And it was getting easier and easier to think about in his head, becoming more and more practiced. He loved you for you.

For your smile when you woke up and rolled over to kiss his forehead first thing before you got up every morning.

For the sanity he felt when he was wrapped in your arms, no matter what was going on outside.

For everything he was when he was with you that he wasn’t when he was without you. Soft, human, unburdened... a good man...

Colombia had nothing to do with it. It was just you and him. 

“Thank you.” He said pretty silently, trying to keep it just between the two of you as the sun began to set around you, casting shadows over your face while you assembled the M4 in front of you with ease.

His words stopped you though, your hands freezing as your stare switched back up to him. “For this?”

He nodded, “you don’t have to be out here for this, you don’t have to be putting your life on the line for me—“

“Javi, don’t...”

“I’m serious.” He fought as he positioned his gun in the back of his pants. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me.”

“You’re doing this for me—“

“Yeah, and if I thought for a second you wouldn’t do the same for me, maybe I’d hesitate but...” you sighed, shaking your head as your attention dropped back to your work, your hands still moving with practiced ease. “Just... you don’t have to thank me.”

Someone shouted something from across the small camp, signalling that everyone was ready to go and you quickly snapped the rest of the gun together and strapped it over your vested chest. But before you moved to head out into the jungle clearing and towards the helicopter, he caught your arm and pulled you towards him, as much as he could with the two of you wearing your bulky bullet proof vests. 

He lowered his voice as he brought his head closer to yours in spite of your protest, “thank you.”

And that was when you reached your hand back around his head and caught him completely off guard, bringing your lips to his for a brief kiss. A brief kiss that burned the same way your words had in his mind as the phone call from hours ago ended. With the simple touch of your lips to his, you were confirming everything you had when you ended the phone call, everything that had been occupying his thoughts the whole day.

“You don’t have to thank me.” You sighed one last time before turning away and following the soldiers and Castano brothers to the helicopter. And he heard the unspoken words that follow it. 

You didn’t want him to thank you because you loved him and you knew he loved you, you knew he’d do the same for you. 

He didn’t need to guess if it was a slip or not anymore, that didn’t matter.

He knew you loved him. And fuck, he really loved you.

Now, he had a war zone to head into and a woman to rescue. And with you by his side, things didn’t feel so dark anymore. 

tags: 

@the-feckless-wonder  @arrowswithwifi  @ms-dont-care @leo-moon @tiffdawg @readsalot73 @way-too-addicted-to-anime @keeper0fthestars @adikaofmandalore @opheliaelysia @magneticbucky @videogamesandpoorlifechoices​ @larakasser @littlevodika @mandoren @mistermiraclee @rogueonestan @kaetastic @littlemissthistle @maytheglitter(open)

[thehouseoflamentation]

Everyday we stray further from god’s light...jk jk

I said I was ok with most nsfw and now I’m gonna live up to that claim so here we go!!!

Btw I checked Bad Dragon’s website and they actually have a model called “Demon Dick” so uhh….yeah….

For some reason “keep reading” was messing with the format so I had to repost this. I didn’t include any pictures but I did include links to what I think the boys might look like down there based on the models they had so proceed at your own risk!!

(Side note: I only had shape in mind while I was choosing these bc some of those colors really be wild. Also I’d like to imagine they’re all “extra large” sized)

Lucifer - (https://bad-dragon.com/products/axel)

That night, Lucifer called you into his room for a little “chat.” What was supposed to be a discussion of the student exchange program quickly escalated into something else as you found yourself unable to pull away from his lips as he trapped you in his embrace. It wasn’t long before he moved to the bed, sat down, and shifted his legs apart making it very clear what he wanted next. Now you were on your knees frantically trying to undo Lucifer’s belt while he looked down at you, smirking at how needy you’ve become. After pulling his trousers down to his ankles you made quick work of his boxers moving them down just as eagerly until....you saw it. You thought that since Lucifer looked mostly human the rest of him would look human as well but you were wrong. Not only was he longer and thicker than anything you’ve seen before but his shape was also…well...unique. After staring at it for a good few seconds he moved your face closer by gently nudging your head forward. The action only made you jolt and scoot a good three feet back.

“Lucifer, I love you but I’m not putting that anywhere near my mouth” you say as you slowly take a step back.

“And why is that? Too big for a human?” his eyebrows furrowed as you took another step.

“Too big f- YOUR DICK IS THICKER THAN A SODA CAN DO YOU WANT ME TO CHOKE???”

“......”

He stayed silent as he watched you slip out of his room, too shocked and embarrassed by your response to go after you. He didn’t think being “too big” was ever going to be a problem for him until now.

Mammon - (https://bad-dragon.com/products/crackers)

Even though he had his own room Mammon insisted on staying in your room again, going on about how it was an “honor” to have him sleep over. You were starting to get tired of his little act so you decided to shut him up with a kiss. To your credit it did work for a good two seconds before he retaliated by pulling you into a kiss on his own. Soon your hands started to wander up his shirt and while he shivered at your touch he followed your lead and did the same. The kiss was messy but full of passion. Once you pulled apart Mammon carried you over to your bed, plopping you down onto the sheets as he fell on top of you. You knew exactly where this was going so you started to strip once you landed on the sheets. After you threw your clothes to the side you started helping Mammon with his belt. He kicked his pants off then his boxers and as you looked down you almost couldn’t believe what you were seeing. He was definitely bigger than a human and the bumps and ridges along his shaft didn’t seem like they were going to make it any easier for you to take him in. Mammon started to get embarrassed from your staring his skin turning a dark shade of red.

“Quit starin at me like that! W-What are you tryna say I’m small or something cus I’m no-”

“Oh you are anything but small Mammon. Quite the opposite actually. I just...I can’t. I can’t do this. I’m out...”

“What do you mean you’re out? This is your room where are you going??”

That night you stayed in Mammon’s room while he was left to contemplate his life in your room. Well at least you thought he was big so that’s….partially a win right?

Leviathan - (https://bad-dragon.com/products/lenneth)

That night, Leviathan invited you over to read some new manga he got from Akuzon. It received a lot of hype before its release so he was looking forward to reading it with you. When you stepped into his room he handed you a copy of the latest volume in the series and let you sit on his bed while he plopped himself into a bean bag. You laid on your stomach turning page after page but after a while you noticed a pair of eyes spying on you as you rested on the sheets. Levi kept peeking up from his book to take glances at you so you shot him a glance and a smile back making him look away in embarrassment. Deciding the manga could wait, you made your way over to Levi, gently moving the book out of his hands to lean in for a kiss. He was shy but he didn’t seem to resist as he let his hands comb through your hair and wander down your back. Wanting to speed things up you crouched down between his legs and undid his belt and pants zipper before palming him through his boxers. Levi shuddered at the contact but froze completely when you pulled down his boxers altogether. Aside from his impressive size the shape of his cock was definitely different from a human’s.

“Levi...you uhhh-”

“I know”

“It’s umm...”

“Yeah”

“It looks-”

“I GET IT!!!! IT LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING YOU’D SEE FROM A HENTAI NOW STOP STARING!!!!!”

Both of you sat there for a moment trying to diffuse the awkward situation until you decided to break the silence. “Well it’s still not as bad as tentacles right?”

You were forcibly removed from Levi’s room.

Satan - (https://bad-dragon.com/products/fenrir)

You had a test coming up soon and luckily Satan was generous enough to help you study for it. The both of you were seated in the farthest corner of the library to avoid any noise or disturbances from the other visitors. You were able to make great progress with his help but after three hours of cramming you needed a break. Since the two of you were alone with pretty much no one else around to see or hear your shenanigans, you decided to see just how far you could push the demon sitting beside you. Your eyes were trained on your textbook but your hand slipped under the table stroking Satan’s thigh slowly before moving up between his legs. Normally he would have protested by now but it seems that Satan was just as in need of a break as you were. He shifted closer to you making it easier to undo his belt and zipper. You stroked him through his boxers for a bit before pulling them down to his thighs to get a good look at what was underneath. You almost did a double take once you noticed not only the ungodly size of his dick but also the curves and ridges around his head and shaft. Without a word you slid his boxers back up, zipped his pants, and buckled his belt before turning back to the book you left on the table and pretending you saw nothing, unwilling to even look Satan in the eyes after what you just saw.

“Uhhh why did you jus-”

“Wow! This question is pretty hard what did you get for number six again?”

“MC you didn’t answer my-”

“Were we supposed to read pages 134 to 145 or was it 150 to 166?”

“MC!!!!!”

“Shhhh! Satan we’re in a library it's rude to yell”

This went on for a while until the two of you eventually went back to studying, forgetting the events that previously unfolded.

Asmodeus - (https://bad-dragon.com/products/spritz)

You and Asmo had the day off so you spent it at the mall. After getting your hair and nails done at a salon the two of you went to Majolish to find some new outfits. You searched through racks of clothing until your cart was full but before you could buy anything you had to make sure they fit first. As you brought your clothes into the dressing room you pulled on the door but before it could shut you felt a hand stop it mid-swing, preventing it from closing. It was Asmo. He held his pointer finger against his lips to quiet you before slipping into the cramped stall with you. “Today’s been great and all MC but how about we make it even better?” his warm breath tickled your ear as he whispered but that didn’t stop you from nodding in agreement with his desires. There was a chance someone could spot you so you both tried to speed things up before someone noticed. You removed your shirt and guided Asmo’s hands back to your chest letting him play with your nipples while you palmed him through his pants. Neither of you could wait any longer so you got on your knees and started removing his pants and boxers. You were prepared to fuck but you weren’t prepared to see....that. For the Avatar of Lust his cock was certainly intimidating in both size and shape. It wasn’t quite human in appearance either which was pretty evident at first glance.

“Alright MC now just- hey wait! Where are you going?? MC?!?!!”

Before you could even think about how to fit his cock inside of you, you grabbed your shirt, slipped it back on, and sprint-walked out of the dressing room as quickly and quietly as you could, leaving Asmo behind.

Beelzebub - (https://bad-dragon.com/products/clayton)

There was no doubt about it. Beelzebub was one of the biggest and strongest among the brothers but you wanted to see for yourself just how “big” he could really get. After dinner that night, you slipped into Beel’s room with a bowl of ice cream you snuck from the kitchen. You offered to give him some with the condition that you got to feed him. Needless to say he agreed and was honestly enjoying himself until you “accidentally” shifted causing the bowl to slip out of your hands and the ice cream to spill onto your chest and shirt. Beel looked sad for a second because of his ice cream but after seeing the smirk that was slowly spreading across your face he soon understood everything. “You were planning this weren’t you?” Your smirk only grew larger once you heard those words. “Well since my shirt is dirty I might as well take it off~” you lifted your shirt over your head and threw it into the corner of the room leaving your chest exposed, some melted ice cream still dripping down your skin. Beel licked his lips before leaning in to taste you, letting his tongue roam over every curve. Before he moved down between your legs you decided you wanted to get a taste of him too so you pushed him onto his back and started undoing his belt and zipper before eagerly sliding down his pants and boxers. Your jaw almost hit the floor. You knew he was big but this? This was insane!! You couldn’t even wrap your hand around his shaft completely!!! And as if his size wasn’t intimidating enough he also had bumps and ridges along the sides of his cock too!! Your body was ready to nope the fuck out of there so without thinking you slipped your stained shirt back on and found yourself ready to exit Beel’s room, hand already on the door knob.

“Uhh MC? Where are you going? I’m right here!” Beel was still on his back confused as all heck.

“I’m just….gonna get you a replacement ice cream I’ll be back...”

Once you shut the door Beel could have sworn he heard the sound of sprinting. He didn’t see you for the rest of the night but he did find a bowl of ice cream at his doorstep.

Belphegor - (https://bad-dragon.com/products/sleipnir)

You knew Belphegor hated being woken up more than anything but you hoped that he would make an exception just this once. He didn’t seem opposed to sharing the bed either out of fondness for you or from being too tired to care. You curled yourself around him, nuzzling his back while your hands slowly traveled up his shirt. Your fingers eventually worked their way up to play with his chest and nipples. Belphegor couldn’t ignore your presence anymore so instead he was going to make sure you made it worth his time. He rolled over onto his back and positioned you so you would be on top of him. Belphegor wasn’t usually the type to rush sex but he was exhausted after going through classes that day and the fact that you woke him up wasn’t exactly a good thing either. Not wanting to waste much time he grabbed your waist and started grinding against you only stopping for a moment to remove his pants and boxers. You were about to lower yourself onto him until you noticed just how big he was. His length and girth were above that of a human, not to mention he had a number of bumps and ridges along his shaft. There was no way you were about to impale yourself on that so instead you rolled off of him and wrapped yourself in a blanket burrito with your face turned away from him.

“Y’know Belphie it's late, your tired, I’m tired, maybe we should just go sleep RIGHT NOW ”

“Wha- after you spent all that time trying to-mMPH!!” you threw a pillow at his face denying him the chance to finish his sentence.

“CAN’T HEAR YOU I’M SLEEPING!!!!”

Belphie was confused and irritated that you riled him up for nothing but at least he could sleep now.

[jpegjade]

Writer’s Block - Spencer

IT HAS BEEN A LIL BIT SINCE I ACTUALLY COMPLETED SOMETHING. literally i’m jumping from job to job. i barely found time to write this lmao. 

this is for the lovely anon who requested this: can we have a fic where the reader has writer’s block and spencer is helpful? 

here you go anon, HELPFUL SPENCER 

warnings: all fluff and a lil bit of a reference talking about weight but it’s all fluff and nothing seriously deep. 

_____________

“Ugh.” You yelled, throwing your hands in the air. “This is pointless.” 

Spencer was sitting at his desk when he looked up to see you having a partial meltdown on your shared apartment couch. 

“Please tell me why I decided to do this. I can’t think of a single reason why anyone would go through this torture willingly.” You groaned to Spencer, who just smiled in response. 

You were glad he found this so amusing because you surely didn’t think any of it was cute in the slightest. 

“You’ve got a psychological inability to produce a substantial amount of content to satisfy your drive to create.” Spencer continued smiling at you. 

“Cliff Notes version, please. I’m mentally spent.” You said, looking over at him. 

“Writer’s block.” He said, as if he couldn’t just say that in the beginning. 

“At the worst time possible.” You said, groaning again. 

As an author, you were used to the words coming to you easily. There were so many ways to describe a single feeling that you just knew how to craft the language most of the time. It’s one of the many things that made Spencer fall in love with you: You crafted a world of your own through imagination and you were able to pull other people in to experience it with you. It was something special about you that set you apart from so many other writers in your genre. 

Getting up from his chair, Spencer walked over to your spot on the couch to sit next to you. He put his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into him. 

“How far have you gotten on your story?” Spencer said, leaning over to see your laptop screen. You turned it away from him so he couldn’t see anything. 

“Baby, you know I don’t like you to see my works in progress. I only want you to see things when they’re complete.” You said. 

“Baby, I want to see every stage of your creativity no matter how rough.” Spencer smiled. “Maybe I can offer some advice and corrections.” 

“I don’t want you to see everything bc plot holes and such. And I don’t want you to know the plot until it’s complete.” You closed your computer screen so he couldn’t see anything. 

You turned to stare at him as he pulled his arm back, leaving on the back of the couch. The two of you stared at each other, both holding your own secrets. 

Your secret was that you secured a book deal for a Young Adult book. While the signatures were still needed for paycheck negotiations to close, you were holding out on telling Spencer until your manager confirmed everything was official. The call could come at any minute so you were checking your phone every few minutes. You weren’t superstitious but you didn’t want to tell Spencer something before it was completely confirmed. You didn’t want to get your hopes up but more importantly, you didn’t want to disappoint Spencer. He was so proud of you for your constant writing and he loved to read your stories after you sent them to your editor for content when your story was chosen for different magazines, contests, and blogs. If you secure this book deal, it will be huge for you and Spencer, making your dream come true. 

Spencer’s secret was that he was off for a month. He just got back from a case that lasted 3 weeks and before that, he was gone for the larger part of 2 months. There were a lot of back to back cases that ran right behind each other. The two of you made a sarcastic joke that it was serial killer season because it was like clockwork that these cases would come in. It was sad that so many people were hurt and killed in the process but there were countless lives saved by the team and their constant, tiring work. They needed some time off, especially with the last case draining them so greatly. 

“I won’t push you but just know, I’m excited about everything you do. I’m so proud of you for being so persistent in everything. You know, the word persistent is a great word to describe you because it’s more than just the determination to accomplish a task, although many people use it in conjunction with the word. Based on the definition by the Miriam-Webster dictionary, the word persistent means to exist for a long or longer than usual time continuously. You’ve been determined to continue your writing but it’s more than that. You’ve evolved from only writing for whoever will read your work to writing for yourself. You connect with...” Spencer wanted to go on before he noticed your phone vibrating. 

“Hold on, Spence. I’m so sorry.” You said, pulling out your phone. 

It was a text message from your agent. 

“Closed and complete. Sealed the deal. Mucho bueno mi amor.” Your agent followed that text with celebration emojis and you couldn’t look away. By calling you her love, your agent meant nothing by it any more than you called your friends your girlfriends. Your agent knew you well so she was very friendly. 

Your heart was beating a mile a minute, your breathing strained. You didn’t know whether you wanted to laugh or cry, or both at the same time. It was real. It was really real. It was entirely real. A tear ended up slipping through the floodgates, quickly followed by another. Spencer immediately saw the shift in your body language before you were able to hide it. 

“What’s wrong?” Spencer said, worry crossing his face. He didn’t understand how such a happy moment could go south so quickly. 

“It’s not you.” You said, trying to hold back the fact that you were ready to start sobbing. You wiped the tears away and put your hands back in your lap. Fresh tears were right behind those and you weren’t going to stop them this time. You hung your head, chin barely touching your chest, watching the tears fall on your hands. 

“What is it? You can tell me, lovely.” Spencer grabbed your hands from resting in your lap. His thumb immediately began gently rubbing your hands, which only made you cry harder. 

Readjusting how he sat so he could pull you into his lap, Spencer was so confused and so hurt because he didn’t know how to fix it. He couldn’t fix it when he didn’t know what was wrong. He just wanted you to be okay and you seemed far from it. You fought him a little bit. 

“I’m going to flatten you.” You said, finally calming down. 

“Then I will be the happiest flat man alive. You won’t flatten me, lovely. You’ll put your cute butt in my lap, swing your arms around my shoulders, and hang onto me for dear life as you let go of whatever just happened. You don’t have to feel alone if you’re sad.” Spencer said. 

You got up, sat on the couch next to him, and put your legs over his. It was much more comfortable that way and made you less self-conscious. He was staring at you with his puppy eyes and it melted your heart all over again. 

“I have something to tell you.” You said, taking a deep breath. 

“Okay…” Spencer looked concerned, stoic even. He was even a little bit scared. 

“I’ve been hiding something from you and I feel so bad about it.” Tears sprang to your eyes again. 

“Lovie, whatever it is, we can work through it. There are very few things in this world you can tell me that I would be upset about. I”ve seen the worst of the worst. Working out a minor bump won’t break me.” Spencer slightly smiled. 

“No, no. It’s not bad. I promise it’s not.” You let out a sigh you didn’t know you were holding. “I got a book deal.” 

Spencer was silent for a second before he broke out in the biggest smile you had seen from him in a while. He obviously didn’t have a problem being happy as his emotion. Joy overcame him and he gently put your legs on the ground and stood up just to kneel in front of you to cover you in kisses. He kissed every major part of your face before kissing you. A slow, gentle kiss but it still took your breath away. 

“You know you’re amazing, right? You deserve this out of anyone.” Spencer held your face gently in his hands, his thumb slowly rubbing your cheek.  

“I’m stuck, Spence. How am I supposed to finish the book when I can’t even finish the short story I’m writing.” You couldn’t meet his eyes. 

“Maybe I can help. What’s it about?” Spencer stood up, sitting back on the couch next to you. 

“It’s the story of this brilliant teacher who moonlights as a spy. Not the most original idea but it’s not supposed to be original. It’s just a short story that someone requested on my blog.” You grabbed your computer and put it back on your lap. 

“So you’re writing about me.” Spencer smiled. 

“You’re not a spy. You moonlight as a teacher.” You said, opening your computer. You couldn’t bear to look at Spencer’s face right now as he thought about how you were basically writing about him. 

You always took character inspiration from him. He was such a big part of your life that all of your writing had hints of Spencer in them, no matter how hard you tried to leave him out of things. So it was a big deal for him to even figure out that he was largely related to this story. 

“What if…” Spencer started, “You wrote about his dashing butt?” Spencer said, beaming at you. 

You choked on your spit. 

“What?” You said, in between coughs.

“His fabulous behind in pants. You’re always telling me how amazing I look in my black slacks. So why not write about that for fun? I’m sure your blog readers would be quite amused.” Spencer was so hilariously serious that you couldn’t stop laughing. 

“Okay, fine. You win. I will put in something about your butt.” You said, turning your computer on. 

“And insert something about his beautifully flowing hair.” Spencer said. 

“Baby, your hair is short right now.” You said. He allowed you to cut his hair a few days ago and he missed his longer hair but he really liked when you gave him haircuts. 

“I know but if he’s a badass super spy and a teacher, he needs to have versatile looks.” Spencer ran his hand through his hair, a new habit he started when you cut his hair. 

“Baby, you’re going to overwhelm me with ideas.” You said, chuckling. You felt a little better about the writer’s block and the book deal the more Spencer made you laugh. 

“Good. Maybe we should go on a walk and figure out more ideas. Exercise is good for ideas because your blood flow to your brain is increased. You also get mental clarity. Over the next 6 weeks, we can do that more.” Spencer quickly walked to the door to grab both of your running shoes. 

Sitting down next to you, what he said finally hit you. 

“Next six weeks?” You asked, putting your computer on the coffee table. 

You didn’t care that all you were wearing were some cozy shorts and an old t-shirt that was way too big for you. 

“Oh, I didn’t tell you.” Spencer got his right shoe on after a little bit of struggle. “I’m off for 6 weeks after the last case. We all need the break…” He said, his eyes going to a dark place for a moment. You gently touched his arm and came back to life, in the moment with you. 

“So… You can help me?” Your mood got significantly better as you realized he was all yours for 6 weeks. 

“Every step of the way, y/n.” Spencer said, popping up from the couch in his shoes, ready to go.

[echoesnshadows]

𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐚  𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐡   ,   a     twenty   six     year   old   grisha   in   the   little   palace.  she   is   a     heartrender     and   are   known   in   the   little   palace   as   the    𝒎𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒄𝒌  .   they   are   known   to   be    honest     and     abrasive     and   vaguely   resemble    anya   chalotra     .  

            hey  best  frens  !  i  am  so  so  hyped  for  this  ,   i  can’t  wait  to  see  all  your  muses  on  the  dash  and  to  start  writing  with  you  all  !  i’m  very  very  new  to  the  grishverse  ,  i’ve  only  watched  the  netflix  show  (  bc  come  one  ,  who  hasn’t  )  ,  so  there  are  prolly  a  lot  of  knowledge  deficits  in  my  puny  brain  .  please  let  me  know  if  there  are  any  like  very  un  -  canon  things  in  my  intro  ,  i  kinda  just  wrote  it  on  a  whim  .  there  are  a  lot  of   oc  npcs  mentioned  and  not  really  sure  whether  it’s  fits  in  at  all  .  but  hey  ,  at  least  ..  yeah  .  anyway  !  drop  a  like  for  plots  XD

 TRIGGER  WARNINGS    :    MENTIONS   OF  DEATH  ,  BLOOD  ,  PATRICIDE  &  JUST  OVERALL  HORRIBLE  WRITING  .

 let  the  record  show  that  diana  makarovich  wasn’t  born  heartless  .  as  a  child  she  was  ebullient  and  jovial  ,  brimming  with  compassion  and  deeply  consumed  with  a  fervent  determination  to  make  a  difference  .  she’s  the  light  of  our  lives  ,  anton  &  maria  makarovich  would  say  ,  gazing  out  to  their  daughter  chasing  butterflies  through  rain  -  spotted  window  .  then  that  light  became  a  shadow  till  eventually  she  was  merely  an  echo  .

 THE  SERIES  OF  EVENTS  THAT  LED  TO  THIS  UNPRECEDENTED  METAMORPHOSIS  WAS  THE  FOLLOWING  :

 　　—　at  eight  years  old  ,  her  home  was  ransacked  by  investigators  who  sentenced  her  parents  of  violating  their  allegiance  to  the  crown  ,  that  they  were  spies  for  the  fjderans  .  and  she  watched  through  a  little  slit  between  the  cupboard  doors  how  her  father  betrayed  her  mother  to  save  himself  .  they  both  ended  up  dead  anyway  .  but  what  diana  wasn’t  sure  with  ,  is  whether  she  killed  one  of  them  .

  　　—　at  ten  years  old  ,  barely  surviving  on  whatever  scraps  she  could  find  ,  she  was  taken  into  to  an  orphanage  .  there  she  learnt  the  lesson  of  pain  ,  how  to  hide  her  tears  ,  and  how  to  always  protect  yourself  first  .  it  wasn’t  much  different  to  living  on  the  streets  of  poliznaya  ,  only  the  matron’s  bark  was  much  harsher  than  winter’s  bite  .

　　—　 eleven  ,  the  grisha  examiners  came  and  all  the  children  were  lined  up  ,  poked  and  prodded  ,  listened  to  heavy  sighs  at  fruitless  results  then  shoved  to  the  side  .  diana  had  never  thought  she  was  different  .  she  was  just  like  the  rest  of  them  ,  abandoned  ,  lonely  ,  beaten  and  broken  down  by  life  .  even  if  she  could  often  hear  their  hearts  pounding  or  even  if  blood  coincidentally  trickled  down  the  nose  of  who  she  despised  .  when  her  turn  came  ,  she  rolled  up  her  sleeve  ,  expecting  nothing  but  pain  .  but  she  had  been  wrong  ,  about  the  nothing  part  ,  but  not  the  pain  ,  there  was  always  pain  .

  　　—　twelve  ,  only  a  year  at  the  little  palace  and  her  skills  and  already  grown  tremendously  .  it  was  then  she  was  trained  privately  by  stepan  burdin  ,  an  old  man  with  a  receding  hairline  and  penchant  for   fostering   morally   ambiguous   students  but   he  had  had  an  underlying  agenda  ──  he  was  to  train  assassins  for matvei  berezin  ,  a  dangerously  ambitious  noble  on  who  many  have  argued  ,  was  hanging  on  the  precipice  of  his  sanity  .  stepan  was  able  to  harness  her  abilities  ,  her  power  grew  to  such  unfathomable  heights  that  she  was  able  to  use  her  powers  with  the  most  minuscule  movement  of  hands  .

  　　—　four  years  later  she  was  no  longer  a  girl  ,  she  was  a  weapon  .  and  she  was  used  as  so  .  stepan  trained  her  perfectly  for  matvei  ,  and  in  exchange  for  a  comfortable  life  ,  with  food  ,  a  house  and  peace  ,  she  would  be  her  spy  ,  to  extract  information  ,  secrets  ,  lives  ,  to bring  upon  mortal  peril  on  those  who  stood  in  his  way  (  though  she  did  not  know  about  the  latter  till  it  was  too  late  )  .  

  　　—　for  ten  years  there  were  rumours  of  mysterious  passing  of  nobles  ,  some  grisha  ,  some  otkazat’sya  ,  but  one  survivor  ,  just  before  the  life  slipped  from  him  ,  reported  of  violet  eyes  .  that  was  all  he  could  say  of  the  perpetrator  .  and  so  for  ten  years  ,  there  perpetuated  a  story  of  VIOLENT  VIOLET  .  the  mysterious  assassin  of  ravka  .  and  it  soon  becomes  a  saying  people  tell  their  children  ,  as  soon  as  you  see  violet  ,  you  run  .

  　　—　for  ten  years  ,  a  girl  of  shadow  has  been  reduced  to  an  echo  .  and  soon  ,  she  knows  ,  she  will  be  nothing  .  not  even  a  whisper  ,  just  the  quiet  whimper  of  a  nine  -  year  old  girl  who  was  brutally  introduced  to  the  harsh  reality  of  life  .  she  has  not  yet  fulfilled  her  contract  with  matvei berezin  but  has  been  allowed  back  to  the  little  palace  in  preparation  for  the  impending  doom  .  but  diana  has  no  plans  of  staying  ,  she  was  going  to  escape  ,  break  away  from  the  chains  of matvei  berezin  ,  from  the  commands  of  the  queen  ,  she  was  going  to  have  her  peace  .  (  little  did  she  know  true  peace  only  comes  on  your  deathbed  ,  when  you’re  heaving  your  very  last  breath  )  .

 now  diana  makarovich  is  pitch  -  black  winter  nights  ,  she’s  the  shadow  that  haunts  you  ,  the  monster  under  your  bed  ,  the  cold  that  bites  you  in  your  sleep  ,  you  never  see  her  but  she’s  already  behind  you  ,  with  a  white  -  knuckled  grasp  around  your    precariously  beating  heart  .

[winifredsandersonsbitch]

First Up to Bat (Part 2)

Spike x Reader, BTVS

Warnings: mild cursing, implied threats

Description: You may have escaped him the first time, but Spike’s far from done with you.

please forgive me, I’m a slow writer and I’m working full-time hours. I also let this sit in my drafts for a bit bc I wasn’t totally happy with it, but maybe it would feel better as a series?

Over the next few weeks, you settled into the idea of things going bump in the night. After your encounter with the vampire, you start carrying around a few extra supplies in your backpack. You keep holy water in a water bottle (marked with an X on the lid so you won’t sip from it by mistake), a stake you carved out yourself in the outer pocket. Around your neck, you wear a tiny gold cross. You don’t know if it will be a deterrent, but it’s cute, anyway.

You hardly stray from the comfort of the dorms at night now, but when you do you’re prepared. Despite this—or maybe because of it—you haven’t had any other chance encounters with the undead.

Then one night your friend drops you off outside the dorms after a party where you’ve gotten more than a little buzzed, and he’s waiting for you.

Spike.

He seems like the obsessive type, so you aren’t entirely surprised that he’s been keeping tabs on you. When you step out of the car, pausing to pull your jacket more tightly around yourself, you catch a glimpse of movement from the side of the building and a thick waft of cigarette smoke. You tug the holy water from its tiny pocket in your jacket lining, not trusting yourself with the stake you’ve strapped to the inside as drunk as you are.

Spike greets you like an old friend.

Before you can make it up the front steps, he stamps his cigarette out and steps into the light.

“Let me walk you in,” he says, like he has been your date for the evening and has never had any intentions of killing you and draining you dry.

Your hands are unsteady as they uncap the bottle, but you put on your best threatening voice. “Stay the hell away from me.”

“Oh, come on, love. If I wanted to kill you, I would’ve done it by now.”

“You like to play with your food.”

Your words are quiet, a little more slurred than you’d like, but he beams and takes a step toward you.

“You remembered.”

Some of the water sloshes over the brim of the bottle as you fall back off the edge of the sidewalk in your haste to get away, leaving a damp mark on the concrete that Spike sidesteps. He’s so much lighter on his feet than you are, even when you’re sober. You’re beginning to think that your only options here are to die or transfer immediately out of Sunnydale.

“You don’t have to worry about me tonight, although I am impressed that you came prepared. Is that a stake I spy?”

He’s whirling you around before you can even open your mouth to respond, stripping the jacket off you in one quick and practiced move. He laughs at the pouch you’ve sewn into the lining to house your weapon.

“You’re more clever than I gave you credit for. You could teach that Slayer a thing or two.”

“Leave me alone.”

The vial of holy water is starting to feel like a joke in your hand, but you keep your grip around it tight. Spike doesn’t try to pry it from you, just drapes your jacket over his arm casually.

“Let’s get you inside. You’re shaking like a leaf.”

He puts his arm around you, every bit the concerned gentleman, but his skin is as cold as ice. You flinch at his touch. You can tell he enjoys it.

He steers you to the elevator and then up to your room on the third floor, making small talk all the while. He’s so clearly getting off on your fear, but you can’t clamp down on it. All that you have left is the holy water, and he doesn’t seem the least bit concerned. If anything, you think he likes the threat of it, enjoys the pain.

“This is me,” you say when you reach your door, praying that your roommate is out for the night. You know that Naomi couldn’t hurt a fly, let alone fend off a fully fledged vampire, and you don’t especially want to be responsible for her death.

“You’re not going to invite me in for a nightcap?”

“Do you wa—” The response is so polite and automatic that you almost go through with it, until the part of your brain that’s still working checks itself. “Hey!”

“Worth a shot.” He shrugs, then hands you your jacket. “Sweet dreams, love.”

“Wait, that’s it?”

Probably not the smartest thing to say under the circumstances, but you can’t help it. He’s confused you. You would prefer not to be murdered, yes, but you also don’t want to continue suffering in wondering if he’s going to pop out from every shadowy space in your life.

“Did you want to get bitten this evening? Because that can be arranged.”

He’s wearing the same charming serial killer smile as the first time you ran into him, but something’s off. He’s not as confident, for some reason.

“No.”

You drag your keys out of your pocket and fumble with them awkwardly, switching the holy water to your other hand.

“Need some help there?”

“No, um, I’ve got it,” you mumble, but the keys slip from your fingers onto the floor. You both lean down to reach for them at the same time, knocking foreheads.

“Ouch!”

“Bleeding hell!”

His cry seems sharper than yours, more pained, although you can’t figure out why he wouldn’t have a super pain tolerance to go with the super speed and agility.

You almost ask about it, but you figure it’s best to not provoke him any more than necessary tonight. He gets the door unlocked for you and leaves you with a quiet “goodnight,” his overly dramatic black jacket trailing after him.

You get inside to find Naomi safe and sound, snoring loudly and peacefully with no idea of the darkness that lies just outside.

[graceslavenderhaze]

haunted {connor stevens}

synopsis: connor knows your soul and you know his.

authors note:

 friends to lovers? fuck yes! forbidden love? hell yes! ‘no one gets me like you’? double hell yes! ‘we balance each other out because we’re exact opposites?’ triple yes! 

also readers outfits are high key inspired by the iconic julie molina bc she’s a style queen.

fem! reader because request asked for a female reader, usually i write gender neutral unless specified. 

 i threw another jatp easter egg bc we haven’t gotten a renewal and i am on the borderline of becoming feral. 

also this is going to be split into two parts for maximum angst and fluff purposes.

Your parents were always hard on you. Tough love was their specialty, as one would say. So they had certain expectations for you. They wanted the best for you. So there were rules to make sure you always did the best. No going out late on school nights. No slacking off in school. No disobeying.

However any adult who had ever been a teenager should’ve know that challenging authority is a coming of age tradition. You snuck out on school nights for midnight society meetings. You managed to keep good grades in school while being involved in a few clubs to look good for college applications. And for your parents sake you’d managed to be obedient almost all of high school. The ‘perfect girl next door’.

But it was all bullshit. The only person who ever managed to see through it was Connor Stevens. There never was an odder pairing to walk the halls of shadow bay high school than the two of you. He rocked the classic ‘dark and distressed’ aesthetic. He was on the wrestling team and was popular. He was a natural born risk taker and ignored everything that had a warning sign. 

You on the other hand were everything Connor wasn’t. You clashed standing next to him with the bright colors you usually wore in your daily outfits and bracelets that adorned your wrists. You were in the environmental club, art club and theatre. You weren’t popular is the same sense Connor was, sure people knew your name but you were nice to everyone so it was a given that no one forgot the girl who gave out lollipops on valentines day so no one felt left out. You strayed away from trouble and gave distance to warning signs.

You met Connor through Hanna, well sort of, she was in environmental club with you and eventually talked to the midnight society about accepting a new member, you. Everyone knew of with you ,except Connor. He swore he’d heard your name before but he couldn’t put a face to that name at all. So he’d hung around after one of your environmental club meetings with the intention of bumping into Hanna and her introducing him to you. But the day he’d hung around Hanna had a dentist appointment and not knowing anything about Connor’s plan whatsoever, he was left in the dark. 

September, sophomore year

Connors eyes skimmed over the crowd of various classmates but he failed to find his red headed friend, his lack of subtlety gave him away. You were walking with your friends Carrie and Kayla. When you noticed the lanky boy dressed in all black. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” You said to your friends as you parted ways. Once Connor noticed you he tried his best to look as if he wasn’t spying.

“Hey.” You introduced yourself playing with the strap of your backpack as your looked at your classmate who was currently leaning against a tree. He turned acting as if he hadn’t been caught by you. “Hi. I was just.. hanging around.” He said brushing several fallen leaves off of his jacket that had fallen from the light fall breeze that had started to roll in. 

You nodded, “You totally weren’t spying or anything like that right?” You crossed your arms in front of you. His face went slightly red with embarrassment before he started to stutter. “N-no. I was waiting for Hanna.” He said with composure. 

You laughed dipping your head down for a second before looking up at him again. “She had a dentist appointment today.” His face drops flat. You tilt your head. “I knew that.” He rebuttal quickly. 

“You’re Connor right?” You asked. “You’ve heard of me?” He asked with confidence. “Oh yeah, Hanna talks about her friends a lot. Luke, the mr. perfect, Gabby, the smartest girl she knows, Jai, the comic book nerd that everyone loves and Connor, the lanky stalker.” You said with a satisfied smile. 

“I’m not a stalker.” He defended himself. You nodded. “I’m Y/n and I’m not a stalker either.” You said with a wink before you walked away. Connor smiled to himself before pulling out his phone and clicking the messages app. 

October, sophomore year

You laid on your bed, clad in your costume aimlessly scrolling through your instagram feed. Your parents had given you a sun down curfew and due to daylight savings it was dark by six. Halloween was your favorite holiday and you felt like a prisoner in your own house. It wasn’t fair, you followed their rules and were in turn met with more rules and restrictions. 

You sat up sighing, you had been so excited about this night for weeks. Hearing rustling at your window you stand up and cross towards it. Startled slightly when you see Connor there in his ghost face costume. You opened your window leaning against the frame.

“What are you doing still inside its halloween!” He said with excitement, like a kid in the candy store. If anyone loved halloween more than you, Connor came neck and neck. “I’m aware it’s halloween and keep your voice down.” You said to him looking back at your bedroom door listening for your parents footsteps before turning your attention back to Connor.

“Are you grounded?” He asked with a hint of confusion in his voice as to why you would be grounded. You didn’t answer, which only egged him on. “What’d you do?” He scoffed almost not believing you had it in you to do anything bad. You cross your arms sitting back against the windowsill. He noticed your mood change.

“Hey, you can tell me what’s wrong you know.” He said gently, no longer mocking or teasing. He laid his hand on top of yours his thumb stroking back and forth. “I didn’t do anything. I do everything they ask of me and it’s never good enough. They gave me a sun down curfew.” You said to him making sure your volume stayed low in fear of alerting your parents you weren’t alone. 

Connors eyebrows furrowed, “The sun went down at six. Seth has a later curfew than you.” He joked as he let out a laugh but once he noticed that you weren’t amused he stopped. “Sorry.” You let out a frustrated groan, “ I get perfect grades, I act like the perfect daughter that they want at my own expense, I sacrifice my own personality for them and its never enough.” You said looking out at the sky that had a full moon. 

Connor sat there in the full moonlight. Your colorful bracelets were discarded, your smile that always was on your face was gone, your eyes were slightly teary eyed, and looking slightly past you saw your room. your doors had artwork and posters on the back but the rest of the room was calm. 

“I think you’re enough. I know you’re enough.” He said in almost a whisper but even if he said it any louder no one else would hear other than the stars and the moon. Your attention turned back to him. “You’re just saying that.” You said looking down at your lap. He placed a finger under your chin and lifted your head back up so your gaze was back on him. 

“No i’m not. I’ll say it everyday until you start to believe it if i have to.” He said looking in your eyes. “I really want to kiss you. Is that okay?” Your voice was so quiet that if Connor wasn’t so close he probably wouldn’t have heard it. He smiled, “Yeah, that’s okay.” You leaned in and closed the gap between the two of you. Through all of this Connors hand was still enveloped over yours. Breaking apart with huge smiles you both giggled. 

“C’mon, we have halloween plans and your parents are asleep on the couch downstairs.” He said standing up and outstretching his hand to you. You hesitated, you’d never snuck out before. “You trust me right?” He said. “Duh.” You said. 

Turning around you grabbed a jacket then, went into your desk drawer grabbing your array of colorful bracelets and hastily putting them on. Turning around Connor still had a hand outstretched for you as you slipped your shoes on. Climbing through your window and regrettably, looking down. 

“Have you never snuck out before?” Connor said concerned about the way you were looking at the ground. You turned your head and shook it. He nodded. “I got you.” He grabbed your hands and lead you along the incline of the roof. Turning around so he could climb down. “It’s okay.” He said before climbing down leaving you up alone. You swallowed hard, was it too late to go back inside? 

“Okay, swing your legs over the ledge.” He said in a hushed tone. You hesitated for a second before slowly moving over the ledge. “There you go!” Eventually you got your legs steadily over the ledge. “Okay so place your right foot right there and then turn around and place your left foot parallel.” Your fear filled eyes met Connors. “I’m right here.” At a turtle speed you started to shift down the shaft. Slipping once or twice and white knuckle gripping the side of the shaft. 

“Are you okay?” You swallowed. “Is it easier getting up than down?” You asked. “Much.” He said bluntly coming closer to make sure you’d be okay if you slipped.  “Thank fuck.” You nervously laughed. “Okay now just go down one at a time.” He said standing at the bottom ready to catch you when you got to the bottom. 

“There’s no more.” You said after your foot slipped. “Yeah now you jump.” He said. “You said nothing about jumping.” You argued. “You’re a foot and a half off the ground, i’ll catch you. I promise.” He said. You turned looking down. “Do i just let go?” You said hesitantly, part of you wishes you stayed in your bedroom. But part of you is glad you didn’t. 

“Yeah. I’m gonna put my hands on your waist, is that okay?” He asked looking up at you. “Whatever gets me on the ground faster.” You said as you felt his hands fall onto your waist. After a few moments you loosened your grip on the shaft and then completely let go putting all your trust into Connor. 

Falling into his chest and your feet plant onto the ground your eyes stay shut as a reflex. Once you were still you opened them, turning around you looked at Connor who had a hard time reading your face. You started laughing. “I just snuck out. With a boy. That i kissed! My heart is racing!” You said taking Connors hand and placing it against your chest. He smiled looking at you. 

present day

“You are blowing things out of proportion.” You said to your mother as you were practically prison marched into your house. She scoffed at you. “Oh i’m blowing things out of proportion! What have we talked about and instilled into you your whole life?” She said rhetorically, she didn’t want an answer but you had one granted she wouldn’t like it. Your dad stood by the door silently as if you’d make a run for it. 

“To do everything and anything to be perfect regardless of who you have to destroy even if you destroy yourself!” You exclaimed crossing your arms. If your parents wanted to play manipulation games you could too, after all you were their daughter. 

“We break our backs to give you amazing opportunities and this is how you repay us? Lying and going behind our backs? Like an ungrateful brat!” Your father finally spoke up. You were never ungrateful for those opportunities, you just wanted to be a normal kid and when you were with your friends you felt like one. 

“I never said i was ungrateful! I just want to be a normal teenager, hang out with my friends and be myself! You guys have made me disregard all mentions of who i am for the sake of this nuclear family image that you so desperately want to achieve.” You said spilling out years of emotions. You hadn’t known how long they’d been in there. Bubbling over and just poisoning your happiness. 

“You just want to hang out with that trashy shawn hunter wannabe!” Your mother exclaimed about Connor. Low blow to an already low battle. “This has nothing to do with Connor and he’s actually a really great person! The only person who seems to care about the real me.” You exclaimed. Your parents were slack jawed. 

“You are to never hang out with that boy again, do you understand us?” Your father said coldly. You were taken aback. Your heart had sunken to your stomach. “We forbid it.” Your mother added on. “You forbid it?” You scoffed. 

“Do you understand?” Your father asked again. You crossed your fingers behind your back. “Crystal clear.” As you turned to go upstairs to your bedroom tears of anger and frustration filled your eyes. Opening your bedroom door and closing it shut. You looked at your window, you were already in trouble. What’s a little more? Shooting Connor a text you then climbed out your window. Connor was right, it did get easier the more you did it. 

After a sneaking around to his house being quick to avoid anyone who you knew would tell your parents about seeing you, you made it there in the average fifteen minutes it usually took to get to his house. “You look like you need a hug.” He immediately after opening the door pulling you into his awaiting arms. You wrapped your arms around his torso. You pulled away and he gently grabbed your chin a sad look washed over his face. “You’ve been crying.” His tone wasn’t questioning it was more of a matter of a factual. 

Your silence only proved what he thought. “Please just talk to me, i hate seeing you upset.” You exhaled a breath you didn’t know you’d even inhaled. He grabbed your hand and lead you to his couch for you both to sit down. He threaded his fingers and yours together, a habit both of you developed during the time you’d started dating. 

“My parents found out about everything and now they’re forbidding me from seeing you.” You said with a bitter tone in your voice, through the whole year you’d managed to keep everything up. Your grades, your attendance in the clubs, and anything else that tied to your limbs pulling you like the puppet your parents treated you as. “Did you sneak out to see me?” He said with a smirk.

“Possibly.” You said quickly biting down a smile causing him to lean in and steal a quick kiss. 

“Wow i’ve really corrupted you.” He whispered, up close you noticed the eyebags from the lack of sleep, his room had light shining that was brighter than usual, and a quick look into the kitchen when you first walked in showed freshly brewed coffee. “Are you okay?” You asked. You could tell the gears in his head were turning at half speed. 

“I’m always okay when you’re around.” He said slyly. You didn’t wanna pry but he looked exhausted. “Did you sleep last night? Like at all?” You said softly. He looked down. “Con, what’s going on.” He thought for a moment about telling you but he couldn’t. He’d be putting you in direct danger, offering you straight to the shadowman. So he did what he did best to protect those he cared best about, he pushed away. 

“Why do you care?” He said swallowing harshly, protecting you was breaking his own heart in the process in a way he thinks might not be fixable. You were taken aback. “”Because i love you, i have since halloween.” The pieces that broke? Yeah they just shattered into more pieces, those pieces all loved you fully. 

“Your parents are right, i’m not good for you.” He had to hold his own tears back before continuing. “You shouldn’t be here.” You had tears welling up in your eyes for the second time that evening. Both your broken hearts were breaking and you had no idea where this was coming from. 

“I don’t want to lose you, i don’t want to lose this.” There had been numerous times during your relationship where you and Connor swore that you were soulmates. There was no word for explaining it, it was just this immense feeling that was mutual and overtaking. Like a wave that constantly crashed over you both every time you saw the other smile. 

“Someday, i hope you’ll forgive me.” He said with his own tears going down his face, and you nodded. Nothing lasts forever. No matter how much you want it to. You stood up and his heartbroken eyes followed you as if you were the sun constantly orbiting. You went for the door. 

“Wait!” His voice beckoned, you turned. His arm outstretched holding out a jacket for you. “Here, take my coat.” You had no fight inside of you. You took it. 

“I’m not your girlfriend anymore you don’t have to.” He cut you off. “It’s an old one from sophomore year, i have a new one. Plus its freezing outside and we both know you look better in that than i do.” He rambled before stopping himself. You nodded and slipped the jacket onto yourself which loosely hung off your figure. He gave you a tight smile. You noticed from the zippers that it was the one he was wearing when you first met and kissed. That was salt in a fresh wound. 

You both stood there, he couldn’t turn back now and you couldn’t know what would happen in the coming week. Neither of you wanted to say goodbye. So you didn’t, you went to the door without saying anything else to him. Then, he just stood there watching. When the door closed he inhaled. 

His lights flickered and he realized he was running out of time. He had to get the cottage and do the ritual before it was too late for him. But he was already out of time. 

[mammon-chan]

Deja Vu (Mammon x F!MC)

TW: blood, death, violent thoughts

A scream echoed through the House of Lamentation. It was a common sound – sometimes Asmodeus would screech about someone stealing his hair products, or Leviathan would yell about missing out on a limited-edition figurine. However, this time, the scream was unfamiliar – higher pitched than the rest of the brothers’ and was silenced quickly.

Mammon, who had walked along the corridor to try and spy on your conversation of Lucifer, raced towards the source. You were lying there, on the ground, battered and bloodied. His own brother, who was supposed to be on exchange in the human world, laughed hysterically as he was pulled back by Lucifer and Beelzebub.

Mammon didn’t understand anything people were saying – there was a roaring in his ears he couldn’t silence. He knelt beside you. Carefully, Mammon pulled your semi-conscious body into his arms. “Elena! Hang in there! Elena!”

“Mammon, you look like such a fool!” Belphegor sneered. “A human’s about to kick the bucket, and yet here you are, panicking as if it’s the end of the world!” He could barely finish his sentence due to his laughter, a crazed look in his eyes that Mammon didn’t recognise.

Your eyes fluttered, shifting to meet his. Your face was tense as you tried to fake a smile, your voice quiet within the din as you spoke, “at least I kept that promise, huh?” His mind went blank as he tried to decipher what you mean.

 He was sitting on your bed. His hands shook as he wrapped bandages around your arm, the shock of you nearly dying at Leviathan’s hand, whilst he’d tripped, unable to stop anything from happening was still evident. Lucifer had stepped in at the last minute, saving you from harm’s way. Leave it to Lucifer to clean up Mammon’s messes, he had thought bitterly.

“…Listen. The next time your life’s in danger, I’m gonna be the one to save you, all right? Don’t you forget that.” He paused, swallowing as his hands slid away from yours. Seeming to hesitate before he continued, “…And if I can’t manage to save ya, then make sure you die, got it?!”

A short silence, and you nodded, giving him a small smile. “All right.” You answered. “I promise.” With your uninjured hand, you locked pinkies with him

Mammon shook his head. “No. No, you’re not gonna die, ya hear me? Don’t you dare die!” He yelled. Tears blurred his vision as they fell down his cheeks. His glasses were getting smeared and he could barely see. He didn’t care.  

Raising a hand up to cup his face, your thumb grazed against his cheek. Your lips moved to form words he would never hear. He felt your hand drop and your eyes fluttered shut.

He doesn’t know how long he held you for. Curses spewed from his mouth as he screamed and cried. At some point he was pulled away from your body by Lucifer who had an odd look of concern on his face. He had tried to calm Mammon down. It doesn’t work. Mammon broke free from Lucifer’s grasp and bolted out of the house as fast as he could. Never stopping, never looking back.

When he finally arrived at the Demon Lord’s Castle, Barbatos was there, waiting for him. With the same polite smile as ever, he greeted Mammon. “So, you still haven’t managed it?” It feels like he’s being mocked. He ignored the comment and passed Barbatos.

“One more time. I’ll save her this time.” He swore on it.

--------

He awoke with a start. It all felt like a bad dream that would never end.

After getting changed into his uniform, he barged into your room as always, to find you, sat at your vanity mirror, seeming to have spaced out. It was normal to find you staring into space – he almost laughed with how regular the sight he saw was. You snapped out of your dream-world and your eyes met with his reflection. Due to the amount of times the brothers had barged into your room, you didn’t seem to be rattled by the fact he’d entered unannounced. “Good morning, mi amor!”

His eyes widened, and in just a few steps, he encases you within a rib-breaking hug that would rival Beelzebub’s.

You let out a small squeak of surprise and patted his arm in hopes he’d let you go so you could breathe. He loosened his grip but kept a firm hold on you. As he spoke, he rested his head on your shoulder. “Sorry, sorry. Just– Lemme stay like this for a little longer.” His voice was barely above a whisper. Your fingers threaded through his hair, and he let out a sigh.

“I feel like I’ve failed you,” He whispered.

You stiffened under his grasp, and he cursed himself for letting his thoughts slip out. “What?”

“Agh, nothin’, nothin’!” He let go of you and waved his hands precariously in front of him and grinned, making an obvious show of ‘nothing’ being wrong. “Was just talkin’ to myself, don’t ya worry, Elena.” You stared at him for a long moment, before you nodded.

“If you say so, love.”

Mammon could tell you hadn’t believed a word he had said. However, you weren’t the type to pry too much, so you didn’t question him. And for now, just being here with you was enough.

You were alright. Everything would be okay.

--------

But he knows that it isn’t. He spent the last year repeating the same day over and over. Trying, trying to save you. Always failing.

Each time you died seemed more devastating than the last – how could you keep disappearing during your conversation with Lucifer, then suddenly show up with Belphegor? He didn’t understand.

He’d tried, time and time again to follow you, but each time, he’d get stuck at the stairs that led to the attic. And surely you weren’t up there, because nobody was allowed there, except Lucifer.

Sometimes his anger would bubble up too much, and he’d even contemplate on whether he should murder his own brother, Belphegor, after he’d killed you so many times. Or at least severely injuring him before his brothers got in the way. Perhaps he could force him to talk about how he killed you when he was supposed to be in the human world. The violent urges would pass within minutes, and he’d mentally beat himself up over the fact he’d even think about killing his own brother.

--------

You had died once again. He had found you, half conscious, being dragged out to the hallway by his brother, who’s chest puffed out with pride at killing a ‘measly’ human that he despised. At some point, during one of the many times he’d repeated the timeline, he’d stopped crying when you died. He’d grown numb to the sensation of grief stabbing away at his heart. Instead, he turned, his head lowered, fists swung tightly by his sides. He left the House of Lamentation as his brothers mourned after you, and headed, as always, to the Demon Lord’s Castle.

The first thing Mammon had saw was Barbatos, stood by the entrance. His lips were curled into a smirk, and Mammon walked forward. He swung his fist forwards towards the other demon’s face, and Barbatos caught the punch before it landed, twisting Mammon’s hand away from him before he released.

“There’s no point in getting upset at me for your own failures.” The butler turned and walked back inside, and Mammon followed him inside, just like clockwork.

“You’re right.” He mumbled and stretched out his hand, fingers running over the fingernail marks that had bit into his palm.

He had followed Barbatos into his room, watched as he opened the door once again for him. If he stepped through, everything would be reset once again. You wouldn’t be dead anymore. You would be alive, in the Devildom.

With the next step he took, his demon form took place. After all the repeats of the same timeline, in the same dimension, he had grown more powerful. He could feel this extra energy surging through his veins, urging him to finally make a move. Barbatos turned towards Mammon as he stepped forward again, and with one swift blow to the head, he was down. He kicked the door shut, moving towards another door before Barbatos could recover. He was just thankful that Barbatos had explained which door contained which power, or he would’ve been lost in the time-loop forever. He yanked the door open.

“There’s only one way for us to be happy.” He muttered to himself as he stepped into the void beyond the doorway.

If he couldn’t save you, then he would create a universe where you would never get hurt again.

And with that last thought, his vision turned black.

  --------

some of y’all might’ve been wondering: damn, jo hasn’t written/posted anything in a bit. jokes legit nobody has thought that and that’s because i’ve been working on this commission for the lovely @eckya! it’s actually the longest fic i’ve wrote in Years at around 1.4k words (which isn’t that long but shh) 

they requested a fic with their custom MC inspired by madoka magica rebellion and it was pretty fun to play around/write with wibbly wobbly timey wimey... stuff. god i make myself cringe, this isnt 2012 tumblr

i hope y’all enjoy this fic bc it took a While due to quarantine fkjbggkj

if y’all did enjoy, feel free to tip my work here! or even commission me!

[bluespiderlilies]

Pillars x Modern reader? Please if it alright with you

hi!! i was going to say no tbh bc my rules say only two charas max but,, i'll let it slide i guess lmao 

modern! pillars x reader!hcs: 

himejima gyoumei:

okay so like,, in a modern au i like to imagine that gyoumei would be a sculptor hehe (yes, i know, not v original).

and you a painter!! 

and like,, the two of you are secret admirers of one another 

like he would often see you at the art gallery he frequents just staring at his sculptures & just,,, looking at them w pure awe?

 which he finds so heartwarming & makes him super motivated & happy in what he does!! 

and at art auctions when he buys your paintings? you feel like fainting from happiness bc the guy you admire so much BUYS YOUR PAINTINGS?!?! 

so then one day the two of you just,, bumped into each other coincidentally while at the art gallery the two of you go to often

the two of you chat comfortably before asking for one another's numbers & discuss about a potential coffee date!! 

and so, after that & a couple more dates, the two of you became official!!

iguro obanai:

hmm i feel like snek boi would be a tattoo artist 

you a florist (FUCK i hate my unoriginal ideas) 

your shops are right beside each other's haha

you sometimes talked but it was only about small awkward things like the weather BYE

but then one day you got locked out of your shop oops

so you,, sort of stayed w/ obanai in his shop until the person you called to help came

 which he didn't mind at all btw

surprisingly, the two of you got along really well? not to mention you guys liked a lot of the same things & had similar hobbies??

 from then on the two of you were kinda Whipped™™™™™ for each other lmaoo,, you often went to each other's shops when you guys didn't have any customers/had a slow day 

so then you decided to confess and!! he accepted your feelings & said he felt the same way!! (screams) & ever since then the two of you began to date uwu

rengoku kyoujurou:

okay so kyoujurou in the kimetsu academy au is a history teacher, right? 

and you are the english teacher!! 

honestly the entire school love the two of you so much

 and they even ship the two of you super hard\ but!! the thing is? the two of you are already dating, haha~ the students just don't know that yet

so it's hella amusing when the two of you witness them trying to set the two of you up with one another 

so you and kyoujurou had a mutual agreement to just act innocent and go along w what they do (which the students totally fall for)

until one day you accidentally let it slip (whoops) 

"hi guys, sorry for being late, kyoujurou won't be here today 'cause he's sick and i had to take care of him for a bit—oops did i just spill everything?"

 from then on the entire school knew the two of you were dating (and thank god, bc now you guys could be affectionate in public lmaoooo)

tokitou muichirou:

muichirou would be like that quiet, asocial first year *wheeze*

& like...there's tons of rumors of him being rude n closed off to others that try to be friends w him

n you're like!! haha!! fuck those rumors i want to be friends w him!! (plus he's cute wink wink) 

so, you try to approach him by sitting in front of his desk during lunch, or talk to him front time to time in your close (surprise!! the two of you are in the same class) 

he ignores you tbh & even tries to push you away,,, but you're super persistent (in an annoyingly,, cute way?) 

but like one day, you're absent from class two days in a row, and he's like,, fuck?? is it my fault??? did i do something to them?? is (name) not here bc of me?? i miss (name) surprisingly a lot and idk why???

and like for the two days he feels like he's fuckin hallucinating or some shit bc he always turns his head to the direction he expects you to be, or like hears your voice even if you're not there? 

but then you came after those two days, and he immediately comes up to you and questions you as to why you were absent 

you just laugh and smile, telling him that you were sick (& tease him too) which he gets really flustered at and even blushes bc he missed you a lot bye 

so then he confesses to you, and tells you that even if it was two days, it felt like forever and he just really missed you and wanted you to be by his side?? and you found that hella cute (also bc of his blushing face) so like uh,, ever since then the two of you started to date

tomioka giyuu:

kimetsu academy au where he's the gym teacher (duh it's canon) & ur the assistant nurse of tamayo uwu

you often supervise whenever giyuu has a class bc you know how rough he can be,, so you're just there in case anything happens

 cue the students being in love w you bc you're the literal opposite of giyuu

cue the students lowkey shipping the two of you too (& the two of you are HELLA oblivious about about, too) 

you like to chat w him sometimes, even if you're the one who's doing most of the talking

despite his rough nature you actually find him really cute and like??? attractive 

and giyuu?? is naturally attracted to you too?? but then one day a student fight breaks out and while giyuu tries to stop it he ends up getting injured

so you, of course, treat him the best you can—tending to the bruises on his face & the cuts on his arms & legs,, and like your touch is so fucking good and gentle and like??? bitch is about to melt too

he ends up telling you that he likes you,, and you're shocked bc omg?? the guy i like just confessed & asked me out (btw u said yes haha)

uzui tengen:

aight so spy!au where he is sent to spy on you bc you're under suspicion working under an illegal organization (wait this counts as a modern au right? yeah anyways,,) 

he moves in to the apartment right across from you as your new "neighbor" 

he also works as the cashier at the bakery you work at too!!

 bc of that, naturally, the two of you got close

you thought he was v attractive and funny lmao,, you especially found his "flamboyant" catch phrase hella endearing too 

and tengen was like: fUCK NO I CANT FALL IN LOVE W YOU YOU'RE MY MISSION!! 

yeah right lmao bc he did end up falling in love w you. so he even asked you out (which ofc you said yes?? like bro tengen is literally the person of you're dreams) 

but he reminded himself that he still had a mission to do, so he used it the fact that the two of you were dating to his advantage to find more about you (aka snooping) 

you didn't really mind that + the fact that he asked lots of questions about you

but once he found out that you were completely clear, he was?? highkey happy and relieved, so he could date you comfortably without being paranoid lmao

kanroji mitsuri:

idol! mitsuri and manager! reader au hehe 

honestly you have been w mitsuri ever since she debuted

you watched her grow as both a singer and as a person—you saw all the sides of her personality, habits, flaws, etc; which honestly? made you fall in love w her 

however, you kept your feelings a secret bc you didn't want anybody to find out plus ruin mitsuri's reputation?

like okay you get fired but you don't want to hurt mitsuri or the years of hard work to be destroyed 

but it's so fuckin hard you know? bc she's super affectionate w you, and you're over here trying to keep your feelings in? 

so eventually you just,,, confess to her—all the feelings you had pent up just finally spill out

unexpectedly?? she says she feels the same way?? but she's been in love w you ever since she first laid eyes on you?? 

so lmao you keep your relationship a secret, even from the agency you work at lmao 

despite the hardships that you guys often face, you get through them together and the two of you couldn't be anymore happier w one another??

kochou shinobu: 

roommates au in which the two of you are college students 

shinobu a pharmacology major & you in toxicology!!

bc of you living together and even sharing some classes, the two of you spend a lot of time w each other 

you guys have plenty of study dates too haha 

and cute stuff like night outs or movies nights!!! 

honestly the more time you spend w her, the more time you?? fall in love shinobu. like. head over heels for her. 

and shinobu's like??? I FEEL REALLY NICE AND FUZZY AROUND YOU (in her brain, though) 

so the two of you end up confessing at the same time during movie night bc the movie reminded the two of you of each other a lot?? uh?? 

when the two of you realize what you said two each other, the two of you laugh it off and just? begin dating 

nothing really changes tbh!! just more affection, dates, spending time w each other, and being more intimate ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

shinazugawa sanemi:

bodyguard au :D in which sanemi is your newly appointed bodyguard and you're a millionaire that needs to be protected 

honestly he thought you'd be snobby as fuck considering that's how rich people usually are in his eyes

 but?? you're really freakin chill and cool?? not like he'd admit that aloud lmaoo

you like to tease him a lot bc he's so uptight w you, but apologize & give him ohagi (which he really fuckin loves?? Uh??)

you always try to convince him to play video games w you lmaoo esp mario kart (he declines though *eyeroll emoji*)

since he's almost always serious around you, when you find him tending to your dogs and being so soft around them you're like?? fuck?? my heart?? 

so basically the two of u dumbasses have feelings for each other but are oblivious + don't want to confess,,, like the more time you spend w one another the more you fall in love?

and he absolutely just,, loves it when you visit orphanages and help w the kids and the way you treat them is so sweet? 

yeah. he's so in love. 

but it wasn't until you ended up in a life-threatening situation that he actually confessed to you—which, as serious as the moment was, you cracked a joke and accepted his feelings.