#and it really does seem so much easier to just
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nezuscribe · 2 days ago
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life as a hit man was dirty but simple, and gojo preferred keeping it that way. he didn’t know his clients names, they didn’t know his. he’d send over proof of his work, they’d wire in the money. dirty, yet simple.
so when he gets a message to kill the daughter of some oil tycoon, he doesn’t think much about it. sure he thinks it’s cheap to go for the kid, but what does he know. this is the most he’s ever been offered for a one shot job, so he’s not an idiot to turn this offer down.
and unfortunately, that meant his next confirmed target was you.
he gets your information, where you go to school, what apartment building you live in, where you like to eat. usually he prefers a straight shot to the head, but sometimes sneaking in something to your food lets him off easier.
gojo gets to know your routine. what you do at what time. what shows you watch, what your favorite sweater is. he watches from the high rises that faces yours, crouching down so none of your bodyguards could see the reflection of the magnifier of his rifle.
and gojo is used to taking out a wide range of people. men, women, grandpas, aunts. it’s just business to him. but there’s something about you that makes him hesitate to pull the trigger.
maybe it’s the fact that the weeks he’s spent trailing after you he’s noticed you’re pretty much a loner. you keep to yourself, never bothering anyone. you don’t seem to have my friends in your classes, or even out of them. gojo never questions to morals of his clients or who they ask him to kill, but judging you so far you seem to have done…nothing wrong.
you treat the old lady who works in the convenience story with such kindness that gojo wonders if you were born into this level of wealth, because most people of your status treat those beneath them like ants. you always hold the door open for your body guards despite them insisting they do it for you. you always buy some food for the stray cats in the alley you pass, and you never yell when you’re on the phone with your dad, even though gojo tracks those calls and feels the need to yell for you.
it all comes to a moment when you’re at your favorite coffee shop (he knows this because you come here so often), and you’ve managed to weasel away from your bodyguards. he knows they must be freaking out by now, but you just want some alone time.
he’s right there, right behind you, the little pouch of his condition of drugs that instantly kill in his pocket ready, and you turn around with your coffee cup and bump into him.
your eyes seen, letting out a shocked gasp as the iced drink stains his shirt and pants, the cup not empty on the floor.
“oh my god, oh my god,” you stutter out, scrambling to find some napkins, “i’m so so sorry! i didn’t even see you there - gosh,” you shove some napkins into his hands, trying to dapple the coffee away but it does nothing to help, “i can’t believe…!” you trail off, the two of you moving out of line so you don’t hold the others up and your shaking your head in dismay, mad at your clumsiness.
“it’s alright,” he assures you, waving it off as his eyes take in your appearance. “don’t even worry about it, accidents happen.” it’s the first time he’s seen you this close, and he feels that pouch growing heavier in his pocket.
because you’re pretty. really pretty. and he likes the plush of your cheeks, the scrunch of your brows, the way you’re nearly gnawing your lip raw. you seem even prettier in person, and there’s a lump forming in his chest, something he’s never felt before.
“no, no,” you murmur, trying to find the tide pen in your bag, only to realize you left it at home, “and it’s stained too, fuck. i am so sorry about this, you probably have somewhere to be and…” your words trail off as you scramble for your wallet, pulling out some cash as you push it into his hands.
it’s more than he needs to replace the shirt and pants, probably enough to buy him a couple pairs from ralph lauren, but you still seem to think it’s not enough as you look for more.
“it’s no worries at all, i keep an extra of shirts in my car for emergencies like this,” gojo lies smoothly and you look up from your purse, eyes wide in shame. fuck he really likes your eyes too.
“no, please take it, it’ll be on my mind all day if you don’t,” you insist, but he’s shaking his head defiantly, a reassuring smile on his face as he hands the money back to you.
“and it’ll be on my conscience all day if i take it,” he promises you, and after you realize he’s not going to retract his hands you take the cash, shoving it back into your wallet as heat settles all over your body.
of course with your luck you spill coffee all over the most attractive man you’ve ever met.
you still look worried, finding another napkin as you take out a pen from your purse, messily writing something down.
“this is my contact information if you ever need me to replace your clothes,” you hand it over to the man with an apologetic smile, “please don’t hesitate to call me, i know stains and that’s gonna be really hard to get out,” you go to say something else but your eyes dart to the large windows behaubd him, catching sight of your body guards who seem to have seen you, and your face falls.
“i’m really sorry, again, but i have to go,” you mutter as you speed off, waving goodbyes to the stranger as you duck your head down and leave the coffee shop, not wanting to cause another scene as three buff men race in to find you.
gojo stands there almost in a haze, looking at his stained white shirt to the napkin with your number and name on it.
almost as if he didn’t already know it, almost as if you weren’t the girl he’s supposed to kill.
and in that moment he realizes how screwed he is, because he’d rather down that packet right there than shoot you down, and he’s never felt this dread before.
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khorneschosen · 3 days ago
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You're asking to have an argument about Trump's previous term to this one.
When it's quite clear the issue is about which side has the most empathy, common sense, and tolerance.
And when it comes to common sense y'all have none common sense belongs to a philosophy that you no longer practice or believe in.
It's a bumpkin version of rationalism, which Marxist outright deny the existence of. So you guys don't have common sense because you guys aren't rationalist or for that matter rational. Hence why existentialism formed as a reaction to the fact that the prophecy of Marx never came to fruition.
The masses and the proletarian never revolted on mass capitalism didn't become one giant monopoly nor is it really in danger of ever becoming a monopoly where the state is not involved.
What's more the standard living and wealth of the people living under capitalism or even quasi or broken capitalism are still doing better than all the people states of the world Even when those people states have access to a great deal of resources from the rest of the world.
This is by the way why market socialism is the big new hot push, what they really should call it however is modern Chinese socialism.
And however has the exact same problems of a socialist government with fewer tools to be able to deal with it. It's basically the state controls you and you control the factories but we control you so we control the factories anyway. Which is remarkably how national socialism works, you know it as fascism.
And then when it comes to empathy you guys have what can only really be described as transactional collective empathy. If a person or a group does what you say you have a great deal of empathy for them so much so that you'll let them get away with anything however if any member of that group goes against you or is even really just neutral and a way that you can't abide, even a small way you have no empathy for them.
And we've seen that when it comes to cishet white men for a while, and Asians and Jews recently, and even more recently Arabs and Hispanics who do not vote Democrat.
What I'm really describing here is just an in-group preference based on political or philosophical lines, But even then it's more based around whether or not that particular group is useful to you. Because despite everything destiny is one of your guys and y'all treat him like shit, because at times he dares to challenge you guys on some of your worst excesses and on your own terms. In a way that you simply cannot ignore. You can't rightly call him a conservative because the evidence of your own eyes and mind do not allow you to.
This too by the way goes for tolerance, The one axiom that you seem to have in group and outgroup preferences for being your politics and how useful someone is to the cause, you have no tolerance for it.
Meanwhile conservatives come from various different areas of influence. The Protestant and Catholics have long had their doctrine changed to better meet and work with reality. The capitalists are hard realists to the point of irrational pragmatism at times. And the nationalists are operating on a very old form of your system but they do it just for the people within their own nation. Which is just demanding that the benefactors be within their national boundaries.
Oh and liberals have a strong philosophical tradition that goes back to the enlightenment. Of course I mean classical liberals rather than communist calling themselves liberal because it's a lot easier than calling themselves a communist.
So as far as logic goes they're nowhere near as bad.
And as for empathy they are by definition conservatives they are being challenged and at every point of the challenge they have allowed you to challenge them in ways that they frankly shouldn't have. That their own code would have allowed them to crush you at any point and yet refuse to out of empathy intolerance for your kind.
And we're talking collectively right we're not talking about individual examples because if that's the case we'll be here all night but in the broadest strokes conservatives do have empathy tolerance and they're far more logical. I mean even scientific studies have shown that they have more risk assessment which you define is fear for the sake of your propaganda but really it's just risk assessment. Which one we're dealing with the country that is the leader of the free world and if its economy goes tits up, will destroy the free world and an economic collapse from which it will never recover from I don't say that fear or risk assessment is misplaced.
Like baseline conservative is infinitely more rational. Baseline libertarian is infinitely more rational because they at least acknowledge the reality of economics or culture. Y'all routinely ignore the risks or even cost of your actions and policies and ideologically do not believe in rationality.
So yeah leftist and I do mean leftist are less rational, less empathetic and less tolerant.
Also if you want me to get to your second question reword it a little bit, it's confusing how it's currently written.
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fancyfeathers · 2 days ago
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Love the mother daughter pair, but not gonna lie, fascinated by the thought of bruce blackmailing reader, and then having to properly try and woo her back essentially. If he really wants a seemingly loving family, he has to know he needs to coax his wife and the mother of his daughter into a better mood and viewpoint. No matter how much blackmail he has, she can start gaining just as much now that she's in his life, and I doubt the daughter will start trusting him properly with the tension between him and her mother. How would bruce coax the mother back? And would Talia actually have an easier time establishing a connection? Could see Bruce feeling jealous of Talia if that was the case. Idk just the tangent my mind ran on, even if that's not the case still love the work
Yandere Batfam w/ Wife/Mother!Darling & Daughter/Sister!Darling Masterlist
The blackmail is practically all there is he does that truly hurts him, and that’s only if she does not agree to his proposal when states his intent of gaining custody of their daughter. But after that comes to pass everything would be perfect for a normal couple, news about their engagement spreads like fire, and the wedding will probably be the social event of the century given how they were engaged once before and now it’s back on. The most perfect white wedding and Bruce treating his darling like the perfect husband.
Their daughter does not know the details of what happened, one moment it’s her and her mama having a perfect life together, traveling the world and being each other’s best friend, and then the next all of that is over, her father is back in her mother’s life and now she has siblings and none of them feel like the family she had with her mama, it feels suffocating and her mama doesn’t seem as bright as she once did.She clings to her mama every single day and is only separated when her attention is dragged away forcefully from her daughter and one of her brothers of father comes right to the littlest one’s side.
His wife does not push any of them away, she lets her husband hold her in the morning hours when they have just woken up and press kisses onto her face, she lets Dick call her mom as he runs up to hug her, she lets Jason help her daughter with her homework even though she asked her for help, she lets Tim take her daughter out to the park even if it’s their mother-daughter day they have, or used to have, every week, she lets Damian sit down by her and lay against her while she reads to her daughter. She will never be happy but she will fake it, she does not want to make a scene and have her daughter see and realize something is wrong and do something herself. She wants her daughter to be happy and have a future, go to university, leave Gotham and go back to what is left of the life they had, parents make sacrifices for their children and she is willing to do everything for her. She plays the game of pretend, acts like the perfect wife and mother and stepmother, stays calm and bites back all the internal rage she has building up inside her.
Honestly it is after every she has been through just for her daughter’s sake is when Talia starts to think a bit more highly of her, she understands the strength it takes to make sacrifices for one’s child. She also knows how possessive and protective they all are of her and her daughter, so meeting her discreetly is the best option. Like at a charity gala and someone accidentally spills something on her dress and has to go to the bathroom to clean up and-
“Hello again.”
She nearly screamed when she turned on the bathroom light and saw Talia’s reflection in the mirror. Talia helps her clean up and change into a new dress all while talking to her about what she has found out. She went from viewing her as Bruce’s house pet, because it was clear their marriage was not equal, to seeing a mother who is willing to sacrifice and do whatever it takes to take care of her daughter.
But it is during this the question arises and the answer is terrifying…
“What are you going to do if your daughter is just as trapped as you are? What if all you did for her was in vein?”
“I-I….”
“You are far too soft, you will never get what you desire for your daughter while you stay docile, playing the role of a perfect housewife, a house pet…”
“Talia…”
“I should be off now, but do take care of my Damian, he adores you as his stepmother.”
She leaves her alone in the bathroom and she just cries, feeling like a failure of a mother and she she can barely look her daughter in the eye again.
She just lays awake at night with the thoughts of the life she grew up with, she had a golden childhood and all she wanted was that happiness for her own daughter.
After that there is no chance of anyone winning her over, but she will not act out either, she just feels dead inside, like a complete failure of a mother. Her daughter clearly notices something is wrong and while her mother will stay perfectly compliant, her daughter is a completely different story.
The moment she sees her mom loose that shine in her eyes like she had when raising her on her own she knows this is all of their faults, they took her and her mom away from their life they loved and now there is nothing left of the mother who used to teach her to dance at parties, or attend her piano recitals and sat in the front row to applaud the loudest and despite the busy schedule of meetings she had she never missed one, or when her mom who could not help but boast about her daughter’s latest achievements…
Remember she is still her father’s daughter and has a level of determination that should not be tired under pressure.
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anthurak · 2 days ago
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Something ironic to consider: The one time we see one of Penny's strings being cut/broken, instead of it symbolizing her breaking free, it's a prelude to her leash getting tightened via the virus.
Losing the string leads to a LOSS of autonomy.
Yeah, not to mention it also feels similar to how Penny’s strings were turned against her by Pyrrha back in Volume 3.
Really, I think it illustrates the rather narratively-ironic, allusion-flipping relationship Penny has with her ‘strings’. This Pinocchio does have strings on her, but SHE is the one to control them. The strings are part of her, because they are extensions of HER thoughts and will.
Which of course makes it all the more dramatic and shocking when Penny’s strings are turned against her in Volume 3. And even more ironic as you said when a string being broken ends up leading to someone being able to control Penny.
Even more so, I think this imagery around Penny’s strings ties into how she, like most RWBY characters, really ‘flips the script’ on her allusion.
Like how Penny’s big, important and dramatic ‘become a real boy’ moment at the end of Volume 7 when she becomes the Winter Maiden is NOT actually any kind of ‘transformation’. But rather that Penny being able to receive the Maiden Powers is PROOF, beyond all doubt, that she was ALWAYS a real girl.
And when Penny actually does get a literal transformation into a ‘real girl’, it’s both narratively redundant for her character development given the above, and was basically forced on her in order to save her life from the virus.
And if you think about it, Penny’s transformation even wound being a liability. As in, Penny likely would have had a much easier time dealing with Cinder during the final battle if she still had her mechanical body (just look at their previous fight earlier in the volume), and she almost certainly would NOT have been mortally wounded so easily.
Really, when we consider how Penny never seemed to resent her mechanical body or lament being who and what she was or otherwise give the sense that she wished for an ‘organic body’, it really starts feeling like Penny is a Pinocchio who didn’t need to ‘become a real girl’, because she ALREADY WAS REAL.
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olderthannetfic · 17 hours ago
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Im neither a proshipper nor an anti at this current stage in life, but at one point i was an anti i guess? And I hate it say it, but looking back, I understand why. I don't think I actually gave a fuck about Harmful Fanfic or whatever, it was just a substitute for therapy that i couldn't get at the time (because "literally neurodivergent and a minor" or whatever, but like...actually literally neurodivergent and a minor LOL).
As weird as it sounds like, no one cared about my ACTUAL PAIN, and that made me feel EVEN MORE PAIN, so i took it out on ppl who shipped "abuse", or whatever.
It's so stupid now, as an adult who is mentally better than I was then, but as ridiculous as it was, seeing someone ship an "abusive" ship or a "queer erasing ship" (like a canonically gay character with someone of the other binary gender)...it felt eerily similar to the actual abuse I was facing and the stress that everyone was putting on me to find a boyfriend or ask why my (closeted lesbian) self didn't like any boys.
But it was so much easier to keyboard warrior about how people who ship Bad things are Bad people, than it was to fix any problems in my actual life because...well, the actual problems in my life COULDN'T be fixed. That isn't a learned helplessness thing, there was genuinely nothing I could've done. So pissing off Shippers was, like, a vessel for that, and it *felt* like I was getting to lash out at the same people who were ACTUALLY hurting me, even though that obviously is not the case. Funny thing is, it wasn't actual fandom discourse that made me switch sides, it was getting to learn more about youth liberation movements and stuff, because it was then that I recognized the actual structures that were making me hurt.
I think one silver lining is it's made me more compassionate an adult. While I don't have any defense for the antis who do actual horrendous stuff like doxxing or sending death/rape threats, etc, I do have a lot of defense for the ones who were like me and would just make posts talking about how Wrong it is to ship certain things. I know that not all antis are in the same place that I was once was, and some are just genuinely immature brats, but it's like. . . I get it, you know?
The cycle of abuse/bullying is weird and it's not often a 1:1 "I had an abusive parent so now i'll be an abusive parent", sometimes it's the chronically online stuff like I did. It's also why I'm careful-careful to not engage and to just block or, even try to have a mature discussion if I can, and if the person I'm talking to is just "a little bit annoying" rather than "actual bully doing/sending illegal stuff". A lot of them just want to be heard, I think, and it really makes me sad that this is the way they choose to be heard...but also i get it, because i was that.
--
Yup. We often discuss anti tendencies in this framework.
People want control over their environment when they have none. They want the world to make sense and for there to be simple rules they can follow to Never Mess Up. This is a very common reaction to trauma and also typical of brains that like order and neat boxes and a world full of justice and logic.
The trouble is that a critical mass of "I'm just pointing this out" type posts does tend to make all the other teens with an issue around moral scrupulosity implode. (And let's be real, plenty of the antis themselves are secretly into dark content and are trying to pray the gay kink away.)
I have some sympathy, but I'm still going to tell people they're sealioning when they are and tell them they're flat out wrong about how fantasies work, not sugar coat it because they're probably a delicate teen. There's no need to be excessively mean or treat people as irredeemable, but I also don't like how we talk endlessly about compassion for teen antis and not for teens targeted by antis. It's similar to how there are all those complaints like "Hey, I work hard to manage my mental illness, but all the support seems to go to people who are letting their issues rampage..."
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justwhisperingfantasies · 2 days ago
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Girl At The Rock Show Part 5
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Characters: Jensen Ackles (xreader). Mac(o.c), Jared Padalecki. Val (o.c). Phil (o.c)
Warnings: Language, Fluff, Talk of abusive/controlling relationship. A hint of PTSD from an abusive relationship maybe. Let me know if I forgot any. 
Summary: Getting dragged to that live show might have been the best thing that ever happened to you. Now you are falling. Falling fast.
Word count: 6.268 words
A/N: Part 5 Y'all. I am having so much fun with this story. Thank you all for the kind words and the inspiration to keep writing.🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 Hope y'all enjoy it. 💗
Please don't copy my work and post it elsewhere.
Like, comments and reblogs are highly appreciated 💗
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
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{} Reader’s P.O.V {}
You plopped in your bed with a heavy sigh. You lay there replaying the day in your head.
“Hey, do you still need a ride to the dealership tomorrow?” Mac asked from your doorway.
“Not necessarily, I can Uber if something came up.”
“It’s not that. I just didn’t know if you wanted Jen.”
“No.” You cut her off. “Sorry, that came out bitchy.”
“You, ok?”
“I don’t know.”
“Do I need to hurt him?”
You chuckled. “No.”
“You wanna talk about it?”
“I don’t know.” You sighed again. Just then your phone buzzed. It was a picture from Jensen. “Well, shit!” you said opening the message.
“What?”
“I forgot about my cowboy hat.” She laughed at your pouty face.
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{} Jensen’s P.O.V {}
He put your bags in the armchair then threw his keys on the coffee table as he slumped onto the couch.  Somehow his house seemed even more empty tonight. He slid his phone out of his pocket debating whether to send you a picture of him in your hat. Fuck it. He jumped up and tossed his hat. He got the angle and his smile just right then snapped the picture.
As he waited for a reply, he figured he had better call Jared. It only rang once.
“Finally, I was just about to call in a search party.”
Jensen chuckled. “What’s up, man?”
“Nothing just hanging out.”
“Yea. What are Gen and the kids doing?”
“Jensen!”
“What?” Jensen asked laughing.
“Tell me about her.”
“Like I said earlier. She just moved to Austin. I met her at the show last night and I showed her around Austin today.”
“And?”
“She smells like caramel and sandalwood, likes Garth Brooks, plays pool better than me, likes Zeppelin, has great banter, and she’s fun. And she’s smart J.P. She went to Columbia. She’s a Cowboys’ fan adjacent.”
Jared chuckled. “What does that mean?”
“Her mama was a Cowboys fan.”
“So, you like her?” He could hear the smile in Jared’s voice.
“No, I just take random girls all over the city and spend the whole day with them.”
“Sarcastic answer. So, you really like her.” Jensen sighed heavily. “What’s so wrong with that?” Jared asked.
“24 hours Jared. I’ve known her for 24 hours.”
“Dude, the first time I met Gen I knew there was something special about her.”
“Yea well, I don’t have the luck you do.”
“Eh. Maybe you’re luckier than you think Jensen.”
“What if.” There was a beep. “Hold on.” He tapped the speaker phone option and opened the text.
Y/N: I expect that hat back in the same exact condition I left it in Jensen Ross.
Jensen chuckled.
“What?!” Jared asked. Jensen explained about your hat and read the message out loud. “Middle naming you already huh?”
“I guess so.”
“When are you gonna see her again?”
“Not sure. She’s supposed to call me tomorrow after she gets her car.”
“Listen Ackles, you can sit around all day and play that what-if game. It’s a waste of time. I’m not saying hop on a plane and head to Vegas, but obviously, you like her. So stop being scared about it and just take it one day at a time.”
“You’re right, but it’s easier said than done my friend.”
Jared chuckled. “Which part?”
“Both.”
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{} Jensen’s P.O.V {}
He stopped mid-bicep curl when “call from (y/n)” came through his earbuds, a smile spread across his face when he heard her name.
He sat the dumbbell down and tapped his earbud. “Well, hey there, sweetheart.”
“Hello, Mr. Ackles.” His smile got bigger when he heard her voice. “Are you at a club? Sir, It’s 10 in the morning.”
He chuckled. “I’m at the gym.” He started walking toward the door. “Hold on a sec”
“Wanna call me back?”
“No.” He stepped outside. “Better?”
“Yes.  So, the gym huh?”
He smiled. “Yep.”
“What are you wearing?”
“Nothing…”
“I’m gonna need proof.”
Throwing his head back he let out a laugh. “How’s your morning going?”
“Pretty good. I got my car and called Erica.”
“Well?”
“I have an interview tomorrow.”
“That’s exciting! Congrats.”
“Thank you. Still a wee bit nervous though.”
“Don’t be you will crush it.”
“Speaking of crushing it, do you wanna finish your workout?”
“Gimme 20 minutes?”
“You don’t have to rush.”
“I was almost done anyhow.”
“Ok then. Talk to you then.”  
He smiled. “Lookin forward to it.”
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{} Reader’s P.O.V {}
Mac sat down in your car as you said goodbye. “What no argument on who hangs up first?” She said, smiling at you.
You rolled your eyes, “Which coffee shop would you like to go to?”
“Ghoul. You will freaking love it.” She put the address in your maps app. You started following the directions. “So, you called him?”
“I called him.” You confirmed.
“And?”
“And nothing. We talked for a few minutes, teased a little, and he was at the gym, so I told him to finish and call me later.” You said following the curve to E St Elmo Rd.
She nodded and turned the volume up as Burin’ For You by Blue Oyster Cult started to play. The two of you jammed for 3 more songs before making it to the coffee shop.
“Well, that was fun.” You admitted as you parked on the street.
“Just like old times.” She said opening her door.
“This is cute.” You said as you walked past the picnic tables to the coffee truck.
“I knew you would like it.”
You looked over the menu. Mac ordered her drink and then looked at you “Maple boob butter please.” The barista gave you the total and you handed her your card.
“(Y/N)!!” who the hell is yelling my name in Austin you thought as you turned around.
Mac didn’t even have to turn around. “Is Jared Padalecki really yelling your name right now?”
“Babe, I hate to tell you this, but if you know their voice without a face, you may have watched the show too many times”
She turned around, “No such thing!”
“Well, well, if it ain’t the O.G Dean.” You said as Jared approached you making him chuckle. “How are.” He cut you off with a hug. Making you let out a small gasp.
“I’m good,” he said releasing you. “How are you?”
“Good.” You told him and Mac cleared her throat.
“Jared. This is Mckinnley. My Supernatural and everything about Jensen and Jared obsessed best friend.
He smiled. “Howdy, Mckinnley.” He stuck his hand out. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“Mac, call me Mac.” She shook his hand
“Mac” he repeated, and she giggled “How come you haven’t got her to watch Supernatural yet?”
“I have been trying. James was a stupid.”
“Mac!”
“Shit I’m sorry.”
The barista called out your order and Mac turned to grab your drinks.
“Should I ask?” Jared asked you.
“Long story short. There was a thing, but the thing is gone now. I have every intention of watching it.”
“A thing?”
“My ex.”
“Oh.”
“Yea. He was a jealous, manipulative, controlling douche. I wasn’t allowed to watch Supernatural.”
“And he can rot in hell,” Mac said holding your coffee out to you.
“Look, I shouldn’t have pried. I’m sor”
“Jared it's ok.” You took a drink. Damn, it was good. “Jensen knows.”
“Not my business.”
“Yes, it is. He’s your best friend.”
“Jared, you want your usual?” The barista asked him.
 “Yes, please.” he walked to the window and handed her his card. “Hey,” he turned back to you. “I have an odd request.”
“Hit me, Padalecki.”
 He got out his phone and tapped a couple of things.  “Here.” He handed it to you. The screen was set up to FaceTime Jensen. “Just hit the green button.
“Jared,”
“Oh, come on. he’ll be so confused,”
“Ok.” Jared chuckled as you tapped the icon.
Jensen answered but all you saw was sky. “Hey bud, can I call you back, I promised I would call...”
“Me?”
He looked at the phone when he heard your voice. “Hey!”
“Hi.” You giggled.
“Um got a question for you sweetheart.”
“Shoot.”
“Why do you have Jared’s phone?”
“I pick-pocketed him last night and his phone is just way better than mine.”
Jensen, Jared, and Mac all laughed.
“Why do I hear his dumb laugh then?”
“Hey, buddy.” Jared leaned into the screen.
“What’s up?’
“Hanging out, Grabbing some coffee.”
Jensen nodded. “So, you guys hang out now?”
“Well yeah didn’t you hear?” you asked, and Jensen raised his eyebrows “I’m Jared’s new best friend.”
“Sorry, Bruh” Jared teased
“Alright, I’ll take Mac.”
“Um, the hell you will.”
“You can’t have both of them. That’s just not fair.”
“Well doll face, sometimes life just isn’t far.”
Jensen laughed. The barista called out Jared’s name and he went up to the window.
 “Hey Jared, I’m not stealing your phone. Just going to sit down.” Jensen laughed again.
You and Mac went over to a table and sat. Jared joined you after he grabbed his coffee.
“So, how’d you end up hanging out with Padalecki?” Jensen asked.
“Mac and I wanted coffee. So, we came to Ghouls, and guess who we ran into?
“Oh my gosh. Who?”
“Jared freaking Padalecki!”
“No. Freaking. Way.”
“True story.”
“Hey, can I call you right back?”
“Sure.” He puckered his lips and hung up.
“Ok then.”  You said disappointed.
“I got a 10-dollar bill that says he will be here soon,” Jared said.
“I’m not taking that bet,” Mac said.
“So, (y/n) how was the rest of your date?” Jared asked you.
“Good.”
“That’s all I get? Where’d you go after Paperboy?”
“Wimberly Zipline Adventures.” You narrowed your eyes at him. “Did he really not tell you about it?”
“Well, we didn’t really focus on the activities.”
“You gonna tell me what that means exactly?”
“Nope,” he pretended to lock his lips.
You rolled your eyes. “So, Where’s Gen? How are the kiddos?”
He chuckled. “Gen is working today. I dropped the kids off at school earlier.” He took a drink and smirked. “What’s new with you? Where’s your boyfriend?”
“On his way.” Mac chimed in.
“I don’t have a boyfriend.”
“Yet.” Mac and Jared said at the same time.
You sighed. “I do have an interview tomorrow though”
 “Where’s your interview at?” Jared asked
“Pediatric Associates of Austin.”
“You’re a freaking doctor?”
“Not technically. I would be a physician assistant. I dropped out my second year of residency.”
“Close enough (y/n)” Jared said.
“That’s what I said.” Mac agreed.
“Can I ask why you dropped out?”
Mac looked at you. “it’s ok. My mama got sick and didn’t make it. I lost motivation for medicine,”
“I am so sorry (y/n)”
“Thank you. It was a while ago.” You took another drink. “After debating with Mac, soul searching, and a talk with Jensen I decided I wanted back in.”
Jared looked up and you followed his gaze. You saw a big black Chevy drive by.
“Speak of the devil,” Jared said and you looked at him with furrowed brows. “That was Jensen.”
“In the Silverado?”
“Yes.”
You whipped out your phone.
------------------------------------------
Y/N: What do you want to drink?
Jensen: I’ll get it.
Y/N: Stop being stubborn and tell me.
Jensen: Iced Americano with cream, please.
Y/N: Was that so hard?
------------------------------------------
“I’ll be right back.” You walked up to the window and ordered his drink. You turned around and your knees went weak when you saw him walk around the corner. It baffled you how someone could look so stunning in gym clothes, but he did. He would look in anything or nothing. You shook the dirty thoughts out of your mind. He nodded at Jared as he walked past him. Your heartbeat quickened with every step closer. “Hey there cowgirl.” He said when he got to you.
You chuckled and grabbed his face, bringing his lips down to yours. His arms wrapped around your waist and lifted you off the ground as he kissed you back.
“Well, hello there, Mr. Ackles.” You said when the kiss ended. He smiled his dazzling smile, and he put your feet back on the ground.
“Here Jensen.” The barista said smiling at you guys as she held his coffee out the window “Thanks, Val. “He unwrapped one of his arms and took the coffee. “And thank you.” He kissed your cheek.
“No problem.”  You guys turned to your friends who were in a debate about something.
Mac looked up and saw you walking back over. “Shh,” she told Jared. “But this isn’t over.” he nodded. You sat back in the same spot and Jared scooted so Jensen could sit in front of you.
“So, (y/n) I hear you’re a pool shark.”
“Oh, you did?”
“Yep.”
“From which one?” He pointed a finger at Jensen.
You squinted your eyes at Jensen. He looked up “Look. A cool-looking bird.” Jared looked up, You and Mac started laughing.
“Jensen, did (y/n) tell you she has an interview tomorrow?” Mac asked
“She did,” Jensen said
“Did she tell you where?” Jared asked.
“No, she didn’t.” He looked at you
“Pediatric Associates of Austin.” You told him.
“Dude, that’s you take your kids.” He turned to Jared.
“I know.”  Jared finished his coffee.
“Why didn’t you say that when I told you?” you asked Jared.
“Well, I was caught off guard. Jensen said you went to Columbia, but he didn’t say anything about med school.”
You raised your eyebrows and looked at Jensen. He looked at the sky and pointed. You rolled your eyes and looked back at Jared. “Yep. Pre-med, med school, Internship, and the year and half of residency I did was all through Columbia.”
“Damn. So, you’re like a genius.”
“I wouldn’t”
Mac cut you off. “Yes, and don’t even bother with any trivia game.”  
Your cheeks turned pink. “She’s over-exaggerating.”
Mac shook her head and mouthed no I’m not at Jared and Jensen, they chuckled.
“Well, kids. I gotta get this shit done.”
“Aw come one Padalecki.” Jensen teased.
“Dude, Gen will kill me.”
“Yea… I wouldn’t risk it.  Coffee for the road?” Jensen asked.
“Sure.”
“You ladies want anything else?”
“None for me. Thank you though.” Mac said. Jensen looked at you.
“I’m good. Thanks.” He winked at you.
They guys walked back up to the coffee truck.
“So, I introduce you to Jared Padalecki and you fight with him? What the hell?”
She laughed. “We were not fighting. Just a little debate.”
“A heated debate.”
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{} Jensen’s P.O.V {}
“So, Mac let something slip before you got here and (y/n) told me about her ex,” Jared confessed. While they waited in line.
Jensen pressed his lips in a hard line. “I’d love 5 minutes in a room with him.”
“Seems like you both have been through some rough shit.”
“Her more than me.”
“Jensen. Having the girl, you loved give up because of something you couldn’t control is not easy.”
“It was a mutual decision.”  He said as they moved up.
“Still not easy.”
He sighed “Padalecki, get to the point.”
 Jared continued. “Look I’m just saying I understand your hesitation now. I don’t think it’s necessary, but I understand it.”
“She is pretty great huh?” a smile spread across his face.
“Yeah, I haven’t seen you smile this much in years.” They moved up “Does she know you’re going to Vancouver tomorrow?” Jensen’s smile faded.
“I mentioned it yesterday.” He signed “Full disclosure, I’m not looking forward to it.”
“I know, but 2 weeks really isn’t that long. And it's not like you won’t be texting and Facetiming whenever you can.”
“Good point.” He sighed again.
“Trust me Ackles. I got a good feeling about this.”
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{} Reader’s P.O.V {}
Jensen and Jared made their way back over to the table.
“Mac it was nice meeting you. We will finish that discussion next time.” He held his hand out
“Yes, and you will see my side.” She teased and shook his hand. He chuckled.
You got up as Jared walked over to you. “Einstein.” He opened his arms.
“Sasquatch.” You said opening yours.
“Always a pleasure.” He said as he squeezed you.
“Same, Next time bring the wife. K?” you said sitting back down.
“Will do.”
“Love you buddy.” Jensen put his fist out.
Jared bumped it with his own “Love you more.”  He said turning to walk away.
“So, what are you ladies doing today?”  Jensen turns towards you and Mac.
You turned to Mac. “Uh not sure yet. Maybe hit some shops, or maybe just ride around and jam out.”
“Oh, yeah I wanna see this car.”
“Ok.” You picked up your empty cup and then grabbed Mac’s.
“Thanks, babe.”
“No problem.” You said as you stood up and headed for the trash can. You could hear them talking, but they were talking too low to make out the words. You threw the trash away and turned back around. You gave them a silly grin when you found both looking at you.  
“Y’all ready?” you asked when you got back to the table.
“Yep,” Mac said getting up. “I’m gonna grab a water. Go ahead. I’ll check up.”
“You sure?” you asked. She widened her eyes at you “Alright.” You started walking toward the street. Jensen wrapped his arm around your shoulders.
“Is it the Camaro?” He asked
“How did.”
“45-day tags kind of gave it away darlin’”
“He’s pretty huh?”
“He?”
“Yes, he. I’m still not sure of a name yet though. He smirked at you. “no.”
He chuckled. “You don’t even know what I was thinking.”
“Yes, I do, and no.”
“Fine.” He teased. “I still get to drive it right?”
You clicked your tongue, “Well I guess. 2 outta 3 ain't bad”
“Um, What?”
“Well, you played with my hair, and you do the nose thing, but”
“Really?!” you shrugged and raised your eyebrows. He stopped and spun you to face him. He slid his hand onto your cheek, “Baby you are so beautiful.” In a silly over-dramatic tone.
“Jerk!”
“Bit.” He stopped himself and pressed his lips in a tight line.
You gasped “What?!”
“Fuck! No, I’m sorry.” He closed his eyes and hung his head. “I’m sorry. It’s a Supernatural thing between Sam and Dean. Sam calls Dean a jerk, and Dean calls Sam a bitch.” He rambled on  “I really wasn’t trying to call you a bitch, it’s like a reflex. I…”
“Jensen. I know about the bitch, jerk thing.” You cut him off “Mac and Zoey do it all the time. I’m sorry I was trying to mess with you.”
“Seriously?”
“I’m sorry.” You brought your hands over your face. “I didn’t mean to.”
“Hey.” He said as he grabbed you and pulled you into his arms. Burying your face into his chest You inhaled the scent of Oud Wood. He tightened his arms, and you could feel the tension in your muscles melt. He sighed in relief. “I thought I really fucked up.”
“I’m sorry.” You mumbled in his chest.
“Sweetheart, stop apologizing. I’m just glad you didn’t punch me and walk away.” His chest vibrated on your face as he chuckled, and you couldn’t help but joy in.
“But ya know something Ackles,” you said as you looked up at him. He raised his eyebrows “You’re pretty cute when you ramble.”
He laughed and squeezed you into his chest again.  
“Can I take you out to dinner tonight?”
“Hmm, I don’t know I’m gonna have to check my schedule.”  You teased.
“I’ll pick you up at 6?”
“sounds good.”
He kissed your forehead then your lips. “I’ll see you later sweetheart.”
“Looking forward to it.” He chuckled as he headed for his truck.
Mac stepped beside you “You don’t happen to have a sexy dress for a fancy dinner, do you?” you gave her a blank stare. “Alright, let’s go.”
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{} Reader’s P.O.V {}
You could hear Mac cackling from the other side of the fitting room door.
“Aw poor Jensen,” She tried to check her breath.
You stepped into the lavender dress and opened the door. “Zip me?” you said as you turned your back to her. “I know I felt so bad.” Mac got up and zipped the dress. You looked at yourself in the big 3-way mirror, “I don’t think this one is it boo.” You said posing trying to like it.
“I like the black one better,” Mac told you.
“Me too, but it's so low cut.” You sighed. You walked back to the open fitting room door. Turning around you asked “Hey Mac you think I took it too far? Do you think it will cause..."
“No (y/n). I think you are overthinking this. It will be fine.” You sighed.” Stop he’s not like that and you know it.” You nodded and went back into the fitting room.
“Hey, how’s it going?” the sales lady asked as she walked up to Mac.
“I didn’t like the lavender one. I like the black one, but didn’t like how low cut it was.” You told her as you wiggled into another black dress. You didn’t like this one either.
“Maybe dresses just aren’t for me.” You said, opening the door.
“Oh, I like that one,” Mac said. “But you don’t. Ok next.”
“How many am I going to try before we give up?”
“We are not giving up!” The sales lady chimed in “I have an idea.” She started towards the front of the store.
“She is determined,” Mac said playfully making you smile. The sales lady made her way back to you.
“Alright, Try this one.” Then she handed you a white vintage western-looking dress. You took it and headed back into the dressing room.
You turned to look at yourself in the mirror. “Oh my gosh,” you said pulling the belt around your waist and buckling it. “Oh my gosh, you repeated.”
“Did we find it?” Mac asked.
You came out of the fitting room and twirled. “I love it.”
“Babe!” Mac said, smiling. “That is it. And your boots will go great with it. Aw, and he always calls you cowgirl.”
You giggled. “Well, how could I say no now.”
“Oh, wait right there. We got a necklace the other day that would look great with this.” She went and grabbed it. You lowered your head for her to put it around your neck. “Aw, you look incredible.”
“Thank you. I’ll take ”
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{} Jensen’s P.O.V {}
He wrapped the towel around his waist as he stepped out of the shower.  He made his way across the bedroom floor hurrying to get to his phone before it went to voicemail.
“Jay-rod.” He said after hitting the green icon.
“Hey buddy, I have some bad news.
“What’s wrong?”
“We think Odette has an ear infection. The only time the pediatrician was available was 2. Gen stayed in Houston they have another random acts meeting tomorrow.  What time do you have to be at the airport?”
“2:30, but dude don’t worry about me. Is she ok?”
“Yeah, I gave her some Motrin. It helped with the fever and pain. She’s sleeping now.”
“Ok, I hope she feels better, give her lovins for me.”
“Will do. You could always ask (y/n) for a ride, ya know.”
Jensen rolled his eyes. “I’m not gonna ask her to be my taxi. And I don’t know what time her interview is.”
“I’m sure she wouldn’t mind.”
“No.” he turned on his hair trimmer and started trimming around his beard.
“Whatcha doin'?”
“Getting ready for my date.”
“Oh. I’ll let you finish. Have fun bud, Talk to you later.”
“Later.”
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{} Reader’s P.O.V {}
You looked in the mirror when Mac finished your hair. “Oh, I love it.” She did a half-up going back in braids look and curled the hair that rested on your shoulders.
“Good. Now sit down and let me do your makeup.”
“Nothing too.”
“Yes, I know nothing too fancy. Plus, you have neutral colors on anyway.”
“Alright love,” she said as she finished. “You look freaking stunning!”
You stood up and looked in your bathroom mirror. “Mac you are a miracle worker.”
“Please. You’d be gorgeous without it.”
You smiled. “Thank you.”
“Anytime.”
“What time is it?” you asked sliding your boots on.
Mac looked at her watch “5:45. At least you’re not freaking out this time.”
“Yeah, not on the outside.” You heard the doorbell. “Early again.”
“That’s not a bad thing.” She said walking out of your room to go get the door.
You took one last look in the mirror and headed downstairs.
You heard Mac and Jensen in the living room. You took the back stairs to walk out of the kitchen. You stopped mid-step in the living room doorway when you saw him. His shaggy brown hair framed his face. That black suit jacket with brown accents and a black button-up shirt underneath. Black slacks that hugged his hips. You swallowed hard as your heart raced. He licked his lips, and a smile spread over his face.
“Well look at you cowgirl.” He said as he started walking towards you. “You look absolutely stunning.”
“Me? Have you looked in a mirror, Mr. Ackles.?”
“I’d rather look at you,” he said with raised brows. Your cheeks turned pink, and he smirked. “You ready?”
“Yep.” He gestured for you to go first. You started walking towards the door and he followed.
“Do you wanna take my truck or your car?”  He said shutting the door behind him.
“Depends, can you drive a stick?” He gave you an unamused look and you giggled. “We can take Beau if you want. I did tell you that could drive him”
He chuckled. “Beau?”
“Yeah, Mac gave me the idea.” He smiled when the realization showed in your eyes. “Motherfucker. Let me guess, one of your characters.”
“Yeah kinda.”
“Dang it. I really liked Beau.” You admitted walking to the car.
“What Beau were you thinking of?”
“Well, Duke of course.”
He came around to the passenger side and opened your door. Then he made his way to the driver’s side. He sat down and readjusted the seat and mirror. “Why do you have to change it?
“Because it’s lame to name him after one of your characters. Don’t you think?”
“No, and technically you didn’t name him after Beau Arlen.” He started the car. Beau’s engine purred. “He sounds good though. What year is it?”
“He is a 2019 Zl1 6-speed with a V8 and 650 horsepower.” He smiled at you. “Yeah, he’s badass.” Your phone connected via Bluetooth and Teardrops on My Guitar starts to play. He looked at you “What? It’s a cute song. If you have a problem with Taylor Swift, I don’t think this will work Ackles.”
“I didn’t say anything, I just didn’t peg you for a swiftie.”
“I don’t think I’d be considered a swiftie, but I like her music.”
He nodded as he put the car in reverse and backed onto the street.
“Don’t stall him now.” He squinted at you. He rolled along without any problems. He turned right onto Nuckols Crossing Rd and then right again onto Teri Rd. You stayed silent watching him drive. He caught you and chuckled. He Turned right onto N Interstate 35 Frontage Rd then merged all the way left to take the ramp onto I-35 N.
Once on the highway, he put the cruise control on. Butterflies came to life in your stomach when he rested his hand on your bare thigh. You took a deep breath.
“What no car games tonight?” He said, smiling. You couldn’t form words. All you could think about was his hand sliding up under the hem of your dress... “Babe?” His raised voice snapped you out of your dirty thoughts.
You answered with pink cheeks. “Yea?”
“You alright over there?”
“Yep. What’s up?”
“Whatcha thinkin' about?”
“Nothing. Just enjoying the ride.” Oh, and you sure would enjoy that ride. You relax when he downshifted to slow down for traffic and you let out an involuntary sigh of relief.
“You sure you’re, ok?”
“Yep, never better.”  Just thinking about how much I wanna jump your bones. No big deal. Traffic started to go. He got back on to the speed limit and set the cruise again. Your leg tensed this time when he laid his hand back on your thigh. Trying to stop your thoughts you took a deep breath.
“Does my hand on your thigh bother you?”
“No.”
He looked at you with a malicious grin on his face. “Oh really?” he slid his hand up an inch. Your leg muscles tense harder as your core twitches.
“Really.”
He slid his hand another inch up, stopping at the hem of your dress. “You know I can feel your muscles tensing up right?”
“And?”
“And so, I know you’re lying.”
“No. You asked if it bothered me.”
“Yeah.”
You smirked at him “That's not the adjective I would use.”
He chuckled as he downshifted to slow down for exit 234B then got into the left turn lane at the light. Heaven by Bryan Adams started to play. He started singing and the butterflies came back.  He slowed down for the next light. You sighed and looked at it at him. He smiled and kept singing. The light turned green, he grabbed your hand and held it around the shifter as he shifted into first gear. “Oh, once in your life you find someone. Who will turn your world around. Bring you up when you're feelin' down” Your heart melted as he sang along.
He hit the next 3 lights green and slowed for the fourth turning his right blinker on. “I should have brought your hat. It would look good with that dress.”
“Am I ever going to get my hat back?”  you teased.
“Eh maybe. I’ve grown quite fond of it.”
“It’s just a cowboy hat there sweetheart.”
“Yeah well, it reminds me of you.” Your cheeks turned pink again and he smiled.
“Well, can you at least tell me where to find it? So it's easier for me when I break into your house to retrieve it after you leave?”
His head raised as he let out a laugh. “It’s in my bedroom.”
“Hm. Maybe I should break in before you leave.”
He looked at you and raised his eyebrows. “That could be fun.” You giggled.
He turned as the light turned green and then left at the next light. He slowed down and pulled into the valet lane.
“Really? You’re gonna let some valet drive my Beau?” you teased.
“He will be fine.” You crossed your arms. “if anything happens to him I will buy you a new one.”
“Shh, you will hurt his feelings. You can’t just replace him.”
He chuckled. “You’re being ridiculous.”
You shrugged and started laughing. The valet came over and opened your door for you. “Thank you.” You said as you took his hand to get out.
Jensen handed the valet the keys and slipped him some cash. “Take good care of him ok?”
“Yes sir.” The man said handing Jensen the valet slip.
Jensen held his elbow out. You slipped your hand into it. “There. That make you feel better?”
“A little.” You said as the two of you walked to the front door. The sign read Dean’s Italian Steakhouse. “Really?!”
Jensen chuckled. “What? They have the best steaks here.” He said opening the door for you. You rolled your eyes and walked in. With the soft lighting and the chandeliers hanging from the ceilings, this place was so pretty.
His hand found the small of your back walking to the hostess stand. “Mr. Ackles. Your table is ready for you. She eyed him up and down. Well, I guess I’d have to get used to that. “Right this way.”  You followed the hostess to a table in the back corner with 4 chairs around it. Jensen pulled a chair out and gestured for you to sit down. He scooted you up and sat in the chair beside you.
“Pulling out all the stops tonight are we?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He grinned.
“Phil will be right with you.” She flashed a flirty smile at Jensen, but he didn’t notice. You had all of his attention.
“thank you.” He said. She walked away annoyed. You chuckled. “What?” he asked.
“You really didn’t notice?”  you said as you found the wine list.
“Oh, I did. I’m just not interested.”  He said, making you smile.
“Hello. My name is Phil I will be your waiter this evening. Would you like to start with some wine or a cocktail?”
“I’ll have a glass of Riesling please”
“And for you sir?”
“Scotch and soda please.”
“I will be right back.”
Jensen leaned back in his chair. “You really do look amazing tonight.”
You looked up from the menu and smiled at him. “thank you. So do you.” He smiled back. “You don’t need a menu?”
“Nope. I already know what I want.” He winked at you
Phil came back with your drinks. “Do you need more time?” he asked.
Jensen looked over at you. “Go ahead.” You told him. You debated between 2 dishes. You made your mind up and ordered after Jensen was done.
“So, I have a question,” Jensen said. You looked at him with raised eyebrows. “Where did you live before New York?”
“How do you know there’s a before New York?”
“You say y’all, you know the Dukes of Hazzard, and you like country music. I’m thinking somewhere south.”
“So, I can’t be a Yankee and like those things?”
“Also, you said you talked your mom into moving to New York after your dad passed.” He chuckled. “And you just used the term Yankee.”
“Wow look at you Ackles, you paid attention. I grew up in a very small town in Michigan. So, no I’m not from the South, but I inherited the mannerisms and taste from my mama.”
“Let me guess. Texas?”
“Did ya think she was randomly a Cowboys fan? We had planned to move back down here once I got my surgical licenses and certifications.”
“Was she from Dallas?”
“No, Canton.” You took a drink of your wine.
“So how did you meet Mac?”
“Oh, she’s from Saugatuck too.” He gave you a confused look. “That very small town in Michigan I mentioned.  I really didn’t think I had a shot at Columbia, so my mom’s college was my backup school. Mac and I both got accepted at Texas University. She understood that I couldn’t say no when I finally got my acceptance letter from Columbia.”
“Interesting.”
“Yeah, I guess so.” You took another drink, “Your turn.”
“Oh, darlin’ I really ain’t interesting.”
“Right.” You said in a sarcastic tone.
He chuckled. “What do you wanna know?”
“Everything.” His cheeks turned pink as a grin spread on his face.
“Miss your Seafood Risotto and your New York strip. Would you like another glass of wine?”
You looked at Jensen. “I can drive if you wanna drink babe.”
“You sure?” Jensen nodded.” Yes please.”
“Coming right up.”
You were looking at his steak as he cut it. “Can I help you?” He asked.
“Nope.” You looked back at your plate. “Just looks pretty tasty.”
He chuckled. “Ya know you’re lucky you're cute.” He said as he held a bite in your direction. “I usually don’t share my steak.”
“Aw, how sweet. Thank you for letting me put your meat in my mouth.” You took the bite, and he threw his head back laughing. “Damn. That’s a good steak.”
“Probably the best meat you’ve ever had in your mouth huh?”
“I don’t know haven’t had it yet.” He laughed again.” Oh, you meant the steak. Yes, it’s delicious.”
“Yet being the keyword there.” He smirked. “What did you get again?” You fed him a bite. “That’s pretty damn good too.”
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{} Jensen’s P.O.V {}
“Hey, what time is your interview tomorrow?” He asked as he sat down in the driver’s seat of her car.
“8:30. Why?”
“Just wondering.” Should I ask her for a ride? He debated
“What time is your flight?” she asked.
“I have to be at the airport at 2:30.” Or would it be harder to leave?
He pushed the clutch in as he shifted the car into first and gave it gas. “Is Jared taking you to the airport?” she asked.
“Well, that was the plan, but his youngest has an ear infection and Gen ended up staying in Houston. So, he’s gotta take her to the doctor.” He explained stopping at the red light.
“Do you need a ride?”
“You don’t have to.”
“Jensen. It’s not a problem. Mac has to work tomorrow. So literally the only thing I have planned is my interview.”
“I’d appreciate it.” He grabbed her hand and laced their fingers around the gear stick again.
“Like I said. Not a problem.” He heard her take a deep breath, “So any more plans for tonight Ackles?”
“Maybe. Did you have something in mind?”
“Maybe. Is your place far?” She waggled her eyebrows.
“Um..” Really? He was at a loss for words. “N- no, not too far.”
His body tensed as she leaned towards him. “Good.” His breath hitched when he felt her warm breath on his ear. She leaned back in her seat smirking. “Because I’d like my hat back.”
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
♡♡ Tag List ♡♡
@litpicks
@muhahaha303
@mayafatimakhan
@idk6505
@whimsyfinny
@nightxcreature
@impala67rollingthroughtown
@mariahoedt
@manicjk
@kr804573
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@nancymcl
@amberlthomas
@hobby27
@deans-baby-momma
@perpetualabsurdity
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babyfoxflower · 2 hours ago
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I had an idea, Alastor having strange feelings around Angel Doe! reader, the reader would be an angel, sent from heaven later to help at the hotel, perhaps reader because she is an angel she is very innocent and does not see or understand why alastor acts strange around her
My Angel
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Alastor x Fem! Angel Reader
Warnings: 18+, MDNI, Mentions of Murder, Jealousy, Possessiveness, No Smut (just cuz the requester didn’t ask for it)
It had been three months since Heaven sent you to help at the Hazbin Hotel, and Alastor for one could not stand it. It wasn’t that he hated or even remotely disliked you. You were a perfectly pleasant girl. A sweet little doe.
You never bothered him with stupid questions. You respected his boundaries, laughed at his old timey puns, and always greeted him with one of the prettiest smiles he’s ever seen. In fact you smiled a lot, something he appreciated probably more than anyone.
You also had the prettiest eyes, the loviest hair, the sweetest face, big adorable fluffy ears, and whenever he saw your fluffy little tail—he wanted to gently tug on it just to hear you bleat.
You radiated beauty and grace, and were beacon of warmth and comfort. Everything about you was perfect. You were a creature of God, never touched by evil or impurity. There wasn’t a single mean bone in your body.
What he couldn’t stand was this strange feeling he felt around you. It was as if he had butterflies in his stomach and his dead heart would beat faster, even occasionally skipping a beat.
What was more annoying was that you seemed completely oblivious to the what you were doing to him. At first, he thought that this was some kind of effect that angels had on others. However when he asked the others about it, none of them felt the same way he did around you.
“Sounds like you’re in love,” Vaggie said.
“Ahahaha! That’s a good one, my dear!” He laughed.
“Hey, I wouldn’t believe it either. But what you’re describing is what it feels like to be in love.”
In love? Was he really in love with you?
Sure, he felt extremely jealous whenever anyone else was taking up your time. Sure, he felt that you should only be by his side. Sure, he murdered a few sinners who were staring at you when the two of you went out for walks together. Sure, there was a time when an especially lowly wretch had the gall to ask you, the most gorgeous lady to ever live, on a date and Alastor ripped the man in half with his bare hands when you were distracted. And sure, he had frequent dreams about you where he would press you up against a wall and…
“Hmm, perhaps what that angry little woman said was true…I’m in love.”
———————————————————————
“Y/n, my dear, may I speak with you?”
“Of course!” You flashed him that gorgeous smile.
Alastor led you away to a corner where you two could have privacy. 
“What is it, Al? You look nervous.”
“Y/n, I…You’re making this more difficult by batting your lovely doe eyes at me.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” you frowned.
“No, you don’t have to be sorry. Damn it! Why is this so hard to tell you!?” He exclaimed.
“I find it easier to just blurt out whatever you need to say,” you replied.
“You’re right. I’ll just say it! I love you.”
You could feel the heat rising to your cheeks, “Pardon?”
“I love you, Y/n. You’re the first thing I think of when I wake up and the last thing I think of before I go to sleep. You’re constantly on my mind, even in my dreams. I love you so much that I can’t breathe when you’re not by my side. When you walk away, I miss you even before you are out of sight. I love you.”
“You mean more than a friend, right?”
Alastor sighed, “Way more than a friend, my darling doe.”
Suddenly that smile that he loved so much returned to your face, “I love you too, my sweet stag! Everything you just said, I feel the exact same way,” you licked his cheek affectionately.
He blushed.
“Oh sorry! I forgot that you used to be human and that humans don’t tend to lick each other.”
“It’s quite alright, my love,” he licked your cheek in the same fashion, “I’m not a human anymore, my doe. I’m your stag.”
Taglist 🏷️: @2dmenforme @xghostnuggsx @alastorthirsty
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antianakin · 21 hours ago
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Literally why the fuck would a clone consider their helmet to be their "real face"?
They only JUST started being allowed to paint their helmets with individual designs after the war began, none of the clones who show up to Geonosis have anything that looks particularly unique (there's a few clones with different colored paint, presumably to denote rank of some sort, but the design is always the same even if the color isn't). So if they DID start thinking of the helmets as their "real face," it would be a pretty new thing for them and not one with a ton of history behind it.
And even after the war starts, it's ONLY once you leave Kamino that you get to have a helmet or armor with any kind of personalized design, the uniforms we see the Domino and Bravo squads wearing aren't personalized at all (again, there's color differences in order to denote which squad you're a part of, but nothing personalized to the actual clone themselves). So they wouldn't exactly have any sort of tradition of feeling like their helmet is their "real face" since most of the time, their helmets are intended to look just as identical as their regular faces.
Also, the clones would still primarily only have a "real face" later in life, so what does that say about how much time they spend without a helmet with a design? We know they take on their own NAMES before they leave Kamino, so it's not like they don't have identities, they just don't have a "face." They don't even get given a "real face" upon graduating and getting assigned somewhere, they have to wait until they're not "shinies" anymore before they get more personalized paint jobs. If the helmet were really their "face," it seems more likely that they'd want to let the new soldiers paint it as soon as possible instead of making them EARN the right to an identity. It just feels so nonsensical.
We also see the clones taking their helmets off pretty often, certainly any time they're not actively in danger or on a mission, and sometimes even then just to make communication with someone else easier (especially if that person ISN'T wearing armor, like the Jedi). Aside from one moment in the pilot episode with Yoda and the three clones with him (which would fall under the category of still being in danger and on a mission), we never see the clones reluctant to take off their helmets or having to be asked to take them off when interacting with others. That moment also emphasizes for the clones that their armor ISN'T who they are, and that their humanity is something inside of them, but that they shouldn't feel the need to hide their faces simply because they're identical to someone else's. And if we assume most Jedi probably had similar moments with their own battalions, a LOT of clones would likely end up actually learning NOT to associate their identity with their armor and be much more comfortable with their faces showing.
In fact, there's a whole DIFFERENT moment a few seasons later where Rex is speaking to Krell and he takes his helmet OFF to emphasize his point about the clones being men, indicating that the helmet actually makes them more FACELESS and therefore easier to see as closer to machines/droids than real people. It's the face UNDERNEATH the helmet that makes them human, not the helmet itself. They might all share the same face, but that face is the one that shows emotion, that can cry, that can smile, that can speak, that can connect with someone else. Regardless of how many other people share it, that's still their real face, not the cold emotionless helmet that too often gets used to pretend the clones aren't people at all.
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damieclipse · 3 days ago
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Agatha is addicted to power, she loves how of a high it gives her to absorb other witches' powers. In Rio, she found someone who is enchanted by her special power, someone who is fascinated by her entirely, who does not judge her, no, Rio is completely intoxicated by all of Agatha, and vice versa, Agatha pulled Death, and Death pulled Agatha, they were unstoppable together. It gives both of them a high when Agatha uses her powers now, it makes it ever more fun, more addicting, because after, there's Rio. Neither of them can help their feelings when both of them have been wandering around with no one else but loneliness until they found each other, they're the perfect couple, they LOVE each other, so much so that Nicholas happens. And they know, they KNOW, both of them, that he can't live, but Agatha can't seem to grasp the idea, no arguments from Rio will make her accept what they both know will happen, all Agatha thinks is she needs to raise this child better than she was raised, she might be a serial witch killer, but she will NOT be a bad mother.
(Except she can't help it).
She runs from Rio, she begs Death not to follow her, and Rio does as she's told, Agatha needs time, and she will always listen and try to bend the rules for Agatha. The spirit witch spends her whole pregnancy running, from something that is imminent. She spends her pregnancy not doing what she's used to do, because maybe, if Death isn't close to collect her bodies, Death isn't close to them either.
(Rio is always close).
Agatha feels so weak by the time Nicky is born, and she goes to her old habits, and it's like giving an addict their addiction back. And she finds that it's so much easier with a child. She can't help it, it feels good, and maybe... just maybe, she could help Nicholas if she had power enough.
(She knows she can't, she keeps doing it anyway, conving herself it's for Nicholas. It's not.)
Agatha loves her child, with all her heart, every day with Nicholas, she feels like she's doing okay as a mother, even if they live in the woods, even if she uses him to lure witches to her. It's not every day, she tells herself, it's not even every week. They are happy.
(Except Nicholas grows up, and it's not that happy anymore).
Because Nicholas hates it, he doesn't understand, and how can Agatha explain to him if there's nothing really to be explained other than the fact that even with him, she's still addicted to power? Nicholas doesn't get it, Nicholas doesn't like it, Nicholas is not like Rio. He doesn't praise her, he isn't enchanted, he doesn't think she's special because of it, he just wants her mother. And Agatha is a good mother, she is, and her son loves her, he simply doesn't love what she does. But Agatha can't not do it.
When Rio finally takes him, Agatha hates her, and a part of Rio hates Agatha, too. She gave them time, she left them alone, and Agatha used him, their child, and for some reason, she is to blame in Agatha's view. Rio bent the rules. Agatha didn't use the time the way she thought she would.
(Rio forgives her, she knows Agatha too much, she loves her too much).
Agatha doesn't, she doesn't forgive Rio, and she doesn't forgive herself. But not forgiving herself is still not enough to make her stop. She makes it worse, she keeps on using her child, using their song to lure more and more witches, and it still feels good, so good.
Sometimes she waits for Rio to show up, only for them to have their fun together and then she runs off again, she can't have another child with Death, she also can't face her for too long.
(They look so much alike, both her loves).
But she also can't help how she misses the praising, the sparkle in Rio's eyes looking at her. Agatha finds her and Rio are still the best relationship she always had, even after a child. Rio is mesmerized, Nicholas wasn't. Rio doesn't ask for explanations, Nicholas did. They always fight, their relationship isn't the same, because Agatha can't handle the truth, and Rio just goes with it.
(They still love each other but Nicholas changed everything).
"The truth is too awful"
"I can't face him"
It's true.
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kaisaerinlover · 2 days ago
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michael kaiser
married life
tw: toxic relationship, abusive
you and your (not so) beloved michael kaiser finally decided to tie the knot. well, he decided, and you obliged. because what else are you supposed to do? you wouldn’t ever betray him, everything he wants is what you want too. he has you so well trained, doesn’t he? you went along with it because of how docile you are, how you’re basically putty in his hands. but you also had your own selfish reasoning, but you aren’t ready to admit that to yourself yet. no, you hoped that if you became his wife, maybe, just maybe, the tenderness he sometimes showed would be more common, the nosebleeds he bestowed upon you with his cruel fists would subside, the gentle nature he has somewhere inside of him would come out more often.
unfortunately for you, that’s not how michael kaiser works. and i think you know that too, don’t you? so why do you keep up the hope? you’re a true masochist, and he’s a true sadist. a very dangerous pair. dangerous for you, the one who subjects yourself to kaiser’s brutality willingly (it seems that way these days).
don’t get him wrong, kaiser yearns for love, yearns to be loved, yearns for you to keep on loving him ‘till the very end. and he knows you will, because you don’t have any other choice. michael kaiser is truly a master of his craft, a skilled manipulator and a very intelligent man. and now that you’re his wife, things really became a whole lot easier for him. he knows he has it drilled into your pretty little head that the only thing good for you in this world is him. him, him, him, him, him. pleasing him. loving him. being with him. being so sweet to him after he’s so mean to you.
he loves you and you love him. so why does the love he feels for his cute wife manifest in the most atrocious of ways? you know, he’s always making dumb excuses for why he’s this way. he thought if he was loved he would stop, then he thought if he got a girlfriend he would stop, then he thought that if he married you he would be able to stop too. he’s ran out of excuses now. he’s fucked up, all that psychology he’s polished up on throughout his life, all those books on human traumas and emotions, they should have made him realise what he really needs is the drive to change and a therapist a million times better than the average one. but he’s a little ignorant too, in that sense. or he was, he realises it sometimes, but he ignores it.
and besides, he’s not exactly one to complain about the arrangement you guys have. especially after marriage. you became so much more perfect, he didn’t even know it was possible. you’re the perfect, doting little housewife. and you’re all for him too, so cute, so docile. you like it too, but kaiser made you. you’re a little too stupid, a little too trusting and a lot too in love with kaiser to realise it. if you were just a little bit more intelligent than the girl he first met, he’s sure you would have realised something was seriously up by now. but it’s fine, ‘cause wits were never your strong point, nope, your sweet obedient nature was. and kaiser likes that.
you’re a great housewife. and he’s a great husband, you think. you’re in the kitchen, cleaning up, wearing a sweet little outfit kaiser bought for you. he’s so generous, he doesn’t have to spend money on you, yet he does. isn’t he just the best? so expensive too, he spends his hard earned money on you? isn’t your husband seriously just the best? you’re dressed in a cute vintage style dress, hair tied up into a cute ribbon and a cute pair of slippers and socks to go with it. haha, you don’t even realise it, but you’re playing right into kaiser’s weird fantasy. he always had a thing for housewives, everything. so now he has you dressed as one cleaning the kitchen whilst he’s hard at work. maybe he’s so obsessed with this dynamic because he never had it himself, his mother packed up and left as soon as he was born, of course. and his dad was an abusive sack of shit. fucking bitches. pieces of shit. ah, he’s getting worked up. he shakes off that feeling.
today, he tried to release as much of that pent up rage into the match. and he won, as always. he’s the emperor of the world. he wanted to get out all of his anger, because what he wants more than anything today is to be a normal couple with you. but that’s not going to happen, it never does.
he walks in, “where is mein engel, hm?” he stands waiting at the door, waiting for you to come greet him like you always do. after getting married you established this new routine. and you do come, you come so quickly to him and stand on your tip toes to kiss his cheek oh so lightly. “micha, i missed you sooo much” you bat your eyelashes at him. he has you trained so well, it’s impressive. you��re like some cute puppy, you’re actually incredibly well trained. he thinks he should indulge in this idea some time, he just likes any scenario where you’re completely submitting to him. but he shakes that thought off, he won’t get distracted for too long.
he wraps his arm around your waist and walks you to the couch, where he sits down and you stand in front of him, between his legs, looking down at him so innocently. you’re confused, maybe you’re not as well trained as he thought, because you sure don’t know what he wants right now. maybe a glass of wine? you go over to the wine cabinet and pull out a glass and pour in some wine.
kaiser is waiting impatiently, he trained you properly, didn’t he? so why the fuck aren’t you going along with what he wants. god, it’s pissing him off. he sees you walk away, ah, maybe you’re finally going to cook dinner as he wants. he picks up the tv remote and turns it to the bltv channel, today will be perfect, he’s going to simply sit with you, watch some soccer and then eat some nice homemad-
and there you are, standing in front of him looking oh so innocent holding out a glass of wine to him. are you fucking serious? you’re kidding right? you’re definitely doing this on purpose, don’t look so innocent. you’re just trying to piss him off, aren’t you? you fucking bitch. “what is this?” he asks you. he’s angry, but he’s being eerily calm. “wine, i thought you wanted a glass?” are you being dumb on purpose? no, you definitely did this to anger him, didn’t you? ah, he’s so mad now. “and why would i want a glass of wine, after such a long day of playing. wouldn’t i want a meal, hm? dumb girl” he patronises you. and you feel so small. “
but you do something unprecedented, something you haven’t ever done before… you have a… reply? you actually talk back? “y-yeah but how can i know what you want-“ enough. he’s even angrier now. why the fuck are you talking back to him instead of bowing and doing what he told you to do. you retarded whore. what the fuck? all that calmness is gone, he’s gritting his teeth.
poor you, you thought you could reason with him before he got mad, he seemed so calm. stupid, naïve you. you thought he wasn’t mad and now you’ll pay the price.
he knocks the glass out of your hand, the glass shatters everywhere, cutting your hand slightly. the wine pours on you, staining you red. and if that wasn’t bad enough, his fist hits you square in the nose. the pain doesn’t even register until you feel the first drops of blood, and then see them on that cute dress kaiser bought for you just days before. he’s towering above you, staring you down. you messed up, didn’t you? “you don’t talk back to me. ever. i didn’t teach you that. next time, keep your pretty mouth shut. you fucking bitch. did you forget your manners? that’s not how a girl like you should be acting. should i just find a new girl, hm?” he’s holding your throat with his tattooed hand. find a new girl????? no, don’t do that micha!!!! don’t do that to you, you didn’t mean to. but now you’re even doubting that, you definitely meant to. you just didn’t realise it. or something like that… it’s your fault.
he slightly releases the hold on your neck to let you talk, you have a chance to make things up with your words. a very slim chance. because he probably won’t care about what you have to say, whether it’s an apology or not. but he’s letting you talk, so use the opportunity before you get a black eye next too. “i-i’m sorry. i’m really incompetent” you don’t even make any attempt to grab his hands off of your throat, or even wipe up the blood streaming down your pretty lips. “i’ll not mess up again micha, i promise.”
your blood is covering part of his tattoo now too, he notices it and withdraws his hand, and laps up the blood. he always had an affinity for your blood, you taste so sweet. he likes tasting the hurt he’s caused you. it’s fulfilling, this is how he likes living. he loves hurting you, he doesn’t like admitting it often though, ironic for a monster like him. for some reason, that anger subsides. he’s not as mad anymore. maybe he’s going to apologise to you? you’re actually kind of hopeful for that, the small, rational part of you that knows it wasn’t your fault. but that part perishes as quickly as it was lit up. he ruffles your hair with his other hand and wipes the rest of the blood his tongue couldn’t quite clear up onto your rosy cheek. “it’s fine, don’t mess up again, ‘kay? i was nice this time, wasn’t i? you’ve had worse from me before. don’t take my mercy for granted, prinzessin.”
you’re so lucky for getting that mercy, thanks kaiser, isn’t he just so nice? you don’t even know how he managed to forgive you for such a horrible mistake. you’re a shitty wife, thank god your husband is so nice. and, ah, that dress, the one kaiser generously bought for you, it’s all ruined. all stained in the wine and blood. you ruined the dress with your incompetence. you messed everything up, god, why did he even marry you? you’re so stupid, and good for nothing.
he can tell what you’re thinking, he feels a little bad, but he’d rather you beat yourself up over it than him. it’s easier that way anyway. he pats your head again. “poor little thing, all bloodied up because of her own stupidity.” he chastises, and you look down in shame. he’s right, you’re so stupid. “let’s go get you cleaned up, little häschen.” and he does, he leads you to the bathroom sink, sits you on the side, and cleans the blood from you. he almost flinches at the newformed bend in your nose, and the bruise which just seems to be getting darker and changing between shades of nasty blues and purples every second. yikes, he forgets how delicate you are compared to him sometimes.
all you can think about is how generous he is, he hasn’t even changed out of his jersey yet. that’s how nice he is. and he’s bandaging you up too, a cute bandage to hide that hideous bruise. he wants to hide your mistake for you? that’s even sweeter, he doesn’t want you to look in the mirror and feel bad for it, right? that’s what he’s doing right? your husband really is the best.
and that night, you make up for your mistake. you serve him his favourite bread crust rusk, and a nice glass of water. get him changed into his robe. tie up his hair. give him blue-red glasses so he doesn’t hurt his eyes. you pamper him, ‘cause that’s what he deserves. you pamper him whilst ignoring that banging headache from the brutal assault on your nose. and the bruise on your neck. and arms. and legs. all from past outbursts of his. you tend to him and treat him like a king even though you’re so injured, but you’re too brainwashed by your husband, too eager to be the perfect housewife so he doesn’t leave you, and you end up ignoring all of this.
kaiser knows what you’re thinking, predictable little thing. he thinks you’re real stupid. he’s the one that should be scared of you leaving, he couldn’t ever find anyone better than you, anyone more willing. you’re perfect. but he won’t tell you that. he won’t give you an ego. keep being scared of being left alone, so that every second you spend with him you’re even more grateful. he’s scared too, but he’s confident most of the time you’re going to stay. he feels a little guilty for everything right now, ah, it’s one of those times. the weight of his actions presses heavy on him, but instead of taking it out on you again, he just pulls you next to him, opens his robe and drapes one side over you, feeds you a spoonful of your home cooked rusk and pinches your cheek affectionately.
“good girl, schatzi. so good. i love you. du gehörst für immer mir.” he nibbles at your ear a little.
and you just sit and blush. “i-i love you t-too micha, ‘s much.”
you’re the luckiest wife in the world, thank gosh your husband is so willing to put up with your incompetence and stupidity. being a wife is so great. you lean your head against his shoulder, and whilst you’re being so tender with each other, you can forget about all your physical pains caused by him, and he can forget about all of the things weighing and stabbing at his mind at all times, caused by everyone. you’re truly his safe place. a real angel sent from heaven.
“engelchen.”
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banished-away · 4 months ago
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artemis and dahlia are so good. the contrast between the supposed hero drizzt always keeping her at an arm's lenght, preferring the "soft look" she puts on to please him where she acts and looks softer and covers her tattoos and scars, knowing she had a painful past but not bothering to ask or look into it because it would shake his morals and he would rather pretend to not know than to actually confront it or even help dahlia through it. meanwhile the supposedly cold killer artemis with just a few looks saw the pain in her, let her have the kill against herzgo because he realized it was important to her even if he had just as good reasons and he didnt know dahlia's yet, and when they were alone he let dahlia be vulnerable to him, asked her about her pain, and when she was not comfortable to speak about it he just stayed near her and comforted her
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evilkitten3 · 9 months ago
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i have a lot of thoughts on fandoms and treatment of female characters but i do not seem to have the words to put said thoughts into. frustrating.
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celerifleuri · 6 hours ago
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i often worry about some aspects being too implicit/obscure so seeing things being picked up on makes me incredibly happy!!
i think you can never truly achieve a perfect balance of implicit vs explicit because it depends heavily on the individual and how willing they are to engage with the text
as a reader who loves specificity, word choice and generally reading into things, i try to write so that one line can be read in multiple ways
this kind of writing may not be for everyone but it's a kind that's very fun to me and knowing that im not alone in this is always quite reassuring !
to your comment on the title and tongues, im going to add a silly expression
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silence is a key part of maelyn's character (the game as a whole even) and she quite literally holds her own tongue at times!
depending on how you read hold and which tongues you associate it with, the title can also refer to the tongues maelyn physically held in her hands, the tongues held together as feathers for the wing, anything you see fit!
(was going to put a screenshot there but it'd be quite long so just go ahead and google 'hold meaning' and have fun 😭)
eric is one hell of a character and i have plans to really highlight the facade he used to have back when everything seemed fine
that will probably be easier to see in bonus episodes but at its core, his character is all about the duality of abusers. how no matter how good someone may seem, you can't know how they think and what they can do, especially when things don't go how they want them to
you mention the dress (rightfully so) and there's also another thing he gives/leaves her with! the braid and ribbons!
he used to tie her hair (//trap her into a sort of feminine ideal) and you'll notice that no matter how loose, she still keeps her hair tied. until a specific ending!
but even there, she didn't untie them herself, she simply became the doll of another. so no matter how free she can appear then, she is very much dead (you could totally argue that death freed her of everything but if she/her mind was freed, her body was not!)
more things can be said about the hair and the doll but ill stop there, you can think of them yourself !
thank you for the 'grounding yourself again' because yes!! it might be in the details but here and there, feelings will take her out of her thoughts and bring her back to reality
for the 'to be kept' part too, thank you
not commenting on everything but i am very much chewing on your words, i love reading interpretations!!
the 'so she could breathe' is also quite ironic because if you're not deluding yourself like he is, maelyn is dead, so what is the point of giving her room to breathe now? like many out there, she needed that way before. it's pointless now, it only serves the one that does the act, it only makes them feel better, considerate
feel free to share your thoughts anytime, i love reading them and rambling in response!
MERU😭😭😭 i finally had a free moment to relax and the first thing i wanted to do was play hold your tongues and i've spent the last few hours pouring over how absolutely beautiful of a piece it is in storytelling and visuals. i genuinely have so much to gush over and idk where i should be doing it so into your inbox it goes. i apologise in advance, you also don't have to respond to this bc 1) i am aware it's gonna get vv long and 2) spoilers will definitely be mentioned
i hope sel knows what an absolute gem of a writer she is for executing all of this bc i am fucking gobsmacked by how well certain ideas and concepts were interwoven throughout the entire piece. maybe a lot of the things following are just my interpretations, but that's another thing i really really love — there's enough ambiguity in the prose to be able to infer it in so many different ways
first to the namesake of the game, ‘hold your tongues’ and the many connotations of tongues that are explored throughout; as symbols of liberation and entrapment that intermingle so so well. i feel like the game really delves into the struggles that women face in society, in relationships, just in general and i like how since it's done so through maelyn's own perspective, we're privy to a more complex and raw display of how deeply emotionally scarring it can be.
eric is a little bitch imo (i won't retract that statement ever) but the ever judgmental, taunting and superior tone he has as the ‘voice’ in maelyn's head speaks volumes of the character he possessed and the lasting impact it had on her. giving her dress to another man makes her ‘unfaithful’, the fact that it's emphasised that these are only ‘remains’ of a dress too — bc eric left her with shreds, physically, mentally. 
if we take the dress to act as a metaphor for maelyn herself, he left her in shreds.
in response to this, maelyn bites her tongue, so hard that it bleeds. it's restraint, quite literally biting back your anger and the feeling of being wronged. grounding yourself again to the harsh reality of it all, and it brings her back to the present moment when starling points it out.
we see a similar occurrence later on when maelyn relays her tongue ‘longing for a taste, was to be kept down.' so again, she stops herself (and i think the wording here is particularly interesting, that it was to be kept, so intrinsically this too may also link to how women are commonly taught to be submissive and forced to fit to certain standards). 
in both contexts, the act of biting the tongue can be taken as a suppression of some sort of desire — the first is the desire to be mad, and the second is the desire of lust. both which women have been criticised for through the ages.
i also like to think that the tongue is a representation of freedom. starling is very much making wings to fly out of them, and taking them away from ppl has ‘forever deprived of their ability to lie’ (in which case lying = freedom, i won't expand on this too much bc it'll be another whole essay😭) so going back to maelyn, her biting hers can also be seen as her freedom being hurt, prevented.
another thing is, the line just before ‘he never ran out of tongues’, we can take this as starling never having his freedom threatened. and it poses further questions. is this because of his strength? is it because he has the ocean ‘wholly’? is it because he's a ‘man’?
on my first run through, one of the most prominent questions i came away w/ was what was it that attracted maelyn to starling? to the concept of these monsters of the sea that had surpassed human constraints that had her waiting out all those hours to catch a glimpse of one to begin with. what was it that kept her coming back? time and time again, day after day when she could've not gone back to that shore after leaving.
the text narrates a couple of things that i think contributed, there's a sense of warring humanity and animosity in the repetitive motifs of dirt and uncleanliness, in her noting that starling looked ‘half a man’ and that one half could've ‘consumed’ the other. maelyn has an envy that's touched upon frequently. does maelyn want to be closer to a monster so that no one can hurt her? or does she feel like a monster is all she can be now?
then there's a dynamic with power that was honestly done so well. again, my praise to sel for how well thought out it all was. that part where she put her hand into his guts and he made sounds he was ‘unable to control’, another when she tells him ‘cut’ and he does so without question — she recognises she holds the reins in that moment, acknowledges, ‘in control, I breathed.’ 
starling listens to her for the most part, it's a reoccuring theme. even when making his wings, he's following her instructions although it's made clear that he learns quick and is capable. perhaps this gives her comfortability.
but we see this turn on its head when things start to go left, starling begins to do as he pleases and maelyn is taken back into her trauma, back to feeling ‘disgusting’ and ‘unclean’, she even apologises and promises to do better.
leashes are mentioned a few times, maelyn first describes them as a sort of ‘necklace’ — perhaps this is tribute to the way a woman's submission is often beautified and normalised. the ‘leash’ starling puts on her in one of the ends is made of pearls, he keeps it in his mouth before this. could this be a reference to eric's sweet words that bound maelyn before he revealed himself? starling ties it somewhat loosely ‘so she could breathe’ yet that doesn't take away the fact that it's still there. it has a sort of your cage is not small, but that doesn't mean you're not locked in it kinda feel.
there's so much more i could say but i think ive alr said too much😭 i didnt even get to touch on the cuddle ending which was my favourite, or the symbolism of losing fingers, the significance of the numbers two, three and four to the story. I DIDN'T EVEN TALK MUCH ABT THE ART😭😭 MERU SORRY I GOT DISTRACTED BUT THE ART WAS PHENOMENAL❗️❗️❗️❗️
maelyn is super pretty and i love how her and starling contrast each other in design so nicely. starling's expressions were stellar ++ the bgs and cgs were beautiful (you're right, if you didn't clarify it i would think you were behind the chest one haha). also the body horror aspect was really brought to life with the visuals and ik it definitely mustn't have been easy drawing all those organs, thank you for your service meruuuu
i'll shut up here before i write another 3k, but both you and sel did such a great job w/ this. the two of you deserve a nice break to rest so pls make sure to take things easy and take care of yourselves!! drink water and sleep when you can, and know that you've made a masterpiece♥️
OH MY GOD THIS ASK IS MAKING ME GO FERAL
It's so well written??? You did such a good job picking up the details hidden behind their lines??? I fish you continued writing because I for sure did not want to finish it and please do send the other thoughts you had if you can, I love this so much
I'm sure @celerifleuri will too so I'll tag her
You already mentioned the spoilers at the start but I'll also note it down here for people who haven't played the game yet. I'm sure sel will do a much better job answering your story analyses but I'll also say you're completely right with most things you've said.
The story takes place in 1800s with dated gender roles we unfortunately can still relate to. Maelyn is a curious woman who wants to study and experiment, but is being held back by society and even people who she thought she could trust, but again Sel will do a better job explaining those.
I'll talk about the art a bit. One thing I really enjoyed that was kinda unintentional on my part was the use of night and day.
The story starts at night time, the first ever cg we get of Maelyn is her jumping down the cliff, with the moon's reflection on her left and the waves giving an illusion of wings as she looks up, in that very moment she is free.
On the other hand the first ever cg of Starling is day time. The sun is shining brightly from his left, almost blindingly, as he looks down. His hair covering the screen like spider webs.
To contrast these, it's night time in the wood ending. Just like the first cg of Maelyn, we can see the soft moonight shining upon them but not quite reaching Starling's face. Maelyn is alive.
Meanwhile in the bone ending, even though they are underwater we can tell it's day time, just like the first Starling cg. We get to see a glimpse of them through the seaweeds covering our view, the sunlight showering them gently. Starling is alive.
For the character designs too, a bit of a reverse but I'd say Maelyn resembles the sun, meanwhile Starling is like the moon.
They both share green eyes, although quite different shades. Maelyn has bright red hair that contrasts Starling's red tongue tail.
I also like that Maelyn's hair, albeit a bit loosely, is braided and kept tidy. Meanwhile Starling's hair is usually all over the place and quite messy.
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vagueiish · 21 days ago
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anyone else have trouble talking to people bc they don't know what they're allowed to say???
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intcrastra · 2 months ago
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Yingxing is absolutely the person Jing Yuan considers his first love, and Dan Feng is the one he fell harder for after getting to know him. But the person he absolutely considers his biggest 'What if' is Igor.
#hc; jing yuan#//He knows very well each and every one of them were someone he could never have; and for a variety of reasons at that#//He knew this well; but still cared about them so strongly#//His love was never about being reciprocated anyways; he just wanted to see them happy & would have loved the chance to make them so#//He wasn't even heartbroken when DF and YX seemed to have gotten together; he was actually so happy#//The only times he actively tried to make a move was once on DF before his punishment was to be carried out#//Which had mostly been desperation & grief prompting him; wanting one final 'happy' memory w him & to try and comfort him any way he could#//Looking back; he's thankful DF hadn't accepted him then. It just wasn't RIGHT#//And the second in trying to get Igor to stay on the Luofu with him; bc he feared he'd never see him again if he left#//That they could surely find a way to help his homeworld together if he did; they could keep trying to sway the Xianzhou to intervene#//That one really had stung to get rejected; but he'd taken it with grace in the moment#//Then bawled his eyes out the moment he had absolute privacy#//He keeps their picture with him always; tucked away right in his armour#//Seeing Luka absolutely wounded in him ways even he couldn't understand while at the same time bringing him such joy#//Almost wanted to treat Luka the way he does YQ; but he heavily refrained. It was easier to do than what seeing DH did to him#//Bc DH absolutely dredged up old feelings for DF; and in ways anybody; regardless if they Knew him or not; could pick that out#//He really had to work to suppress them when the man didn't want to be seen the same; but was DEFFO glad DH set that boundary#//He didn't know what he would have done if he hadn't; knew for facts it would NOT have been fair to DH at ALL. Resolved to ignore what#feelings he got for him. But it still didn't stop JY's heart from being moved by DH himself the more they'd get to know each other#//JY is an absolute hopeless romantic; he sometimes wonders if JL was right in saying his heart was much too soft sometimes
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ryuseitai · 4 months ago
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guy that likes being independent when he has to do stuff alone
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