#and it has elements of my irl identity all over it

[ceilidho]

i think you are the embodiment of art and poetry. you’re the happiness of my day.

wait this is so sweet 😭😭🌷 i'm overjoyed that you resonate with my writing this way!!! ilysm thank you for sending me this kind message

[itsgirlcraft]

Welcome to the masterpost of all [256] of my FavreMySabre AUs/OCs/concepts :]

Feel free to ask questions or just give me a number between 1 and [256]! Or directly ask CWK!Sabre or MCRP!Time for what something means, navigation (i.e., genres, specific characters), or just questions on the multiverse these all belong to!

264 AUs. 256 AUs w/o dsmp, 186 w/o dreams (or dsmp). 8 dsmp-exclusive AUs were included here, I apologize.

Edit: at the bottom of the main list ID, will be a "changelog," where I put additional AUs that I didn't have in the og list. Once a page has been filled, there will be a new picture of it and a proper ID like the original pages.

That way, nothing gets confused. Also, the AU number will change as needed. AU names will most likely stay the same, and if they do change, I will include the og in the changelog.

Under the cut is the digitalized list/"ID"!

I got this done sooner than I thought tbh. Had to go thru my old tablet, my art binders, and all my notes on my phone. Worth it, this is SO USEFUL, my god!

FavreMySabre AUs/OCs List

drm = dream, OC = original character.

2019 era = 2019 and 2020, 2021 era =2021 and 2022, 2023 era = 2023 and 2024.

Oldest AUs (Wattpad, tablet, 2019 era) 62 AUs

•On The Run •Lost In A Fairytale •The Black Hole •Wings And Horns •Ore Steves (OCs) •Call Of The Void •Infected •The Nether Prince •Halloween With The Steves •Steve Saga High •I Don't Know How To Rule! •Future Legends •Altered Realities •Power Switch •Underwater • Not You. Anyone But You. •Why?! •Black Hole Steve (OC) •Family Secret •Undead Me •Fairies •Mirror World •Metal/Magnet (ocs) •The Cursed •Chicken Dad •Containment Breach・Wolf Boy •Vampocalypse •The Night Shift •Covid-19 •Broken Reality •Seven Square Chickens. One Adult. •Demons In My Head •Reverse Evil •Anti-Brine •Genderbent Royalty •Error 404: Steve Not Found (oc/drm) •Chemical AU/2.0 •Confusion •Gender Swap •Earth Portal •Rainbow City •A Glitch In The Matrix •SCP AU •Lost And Broken Soul/Cursed With knowledge •Wisps •Did We Meet Before •Darkest Quest For Peace •Learning The Ways Of The Multiverse •Trapped Crossover •When Three Worlds Meet •The Olympian Saga • Dragon (oc) •Dream SMP Meets Steve Saga:Therapy Edition •Moth (oc) •The Haunting Saga •OG Body Horror AU •Different Artstyle •That One Trapped/Steve Saga Crossover •Storm Steve (oc) •The Weirdest Adventure •Failed_Rainbow_Steve (oc)

Old AUs (2021 era) 48 AUs w/o DSMP

DSMP: •Minepocalypse •The Shapeshifters •The Meet-Up •The Streamers/Hunt •Guardian Of The Forest •The Game (drm) •Trapped In Minecraft But We're Stuck Together •The Monsters In The Cages Look A Lot Like Me

•The Obligatory Reversed Role AU But Optimistic (Steve Saga Roleswap) •DSMP/SS Oneshot •Squinkies Are Taking Over My Life •Time Travel AUs •Fantasy AU ft. Chicken And Horse •Hybrid Boys •A Dance With A Devil •That *One* Prophecy •Fading Humanity •Creatures In The Woods •Experiment Shadow •A Human In A Supernatural World •RQ ODAA •One Disaster After Another • Universe fusions (ocs) •Discolored And Disoriented •Language Barrier •BodySwap •Elements Of Family Magic •The Creation God's Puppets •Crash-Landing Aliens AU •RQ: Security Breach •Follow Me/Robot Soul •Uno Reverse, Fate! •Weapon AU •IRL Twisted Rainbow •Robots, Hybrids, And Experimental Friendships •Seldistynell (OC) •My Life As A Feathered Monster Hiding At A Human College •The Aliens Inside My Computer •The Five Elements •Monster Under Your Bed/Rescue Mission •Lab Monsters •Little Nightmares Crossovers •Monster House In Zombie Land •A Colorful World •Human Machine •Taking It Literally •Digital Magic •FRS' Childhood (oc) • Ancient Aliens • Demon AU •Anime AU • Nightmare Princess •A Rainbow Of Identities

Newer AUS (2023 era) 75 AUs

•Dark Matter/Wilted Lily/Ultra Chaos/ Corruption (ocs) •RQ Plague •Cave Monsters •SSO Color kids (ocs) •SHSF No Evil •The Owl House Crossover •SlenderSabre •Reverse Quest (Rainbow Quest Roleswap) •Wise Anger (ocs) •Blindfold-centric AU Collection •Blindfold Of Skin •Gacha DJ •RQ/TR MLP Crossovers • Naga!Plague •NPCs/Thing (drm) •SS Bodyswap AU •ColorSwap Horrors •TR Roleswap •SL Roleswap •Desk Dolls •AGITM x Trapped •TR Weirdcore •Become Food •ZWV Hybrid (drm) •Half-Fused TR •RealityElan •MCRP •"B" The Elf-Eared (oc/drm) • Jellyfish!Twisted •Human!Galaxy (drm) •Halloween TR •Alien!Sabre •Vent AU •Crystal Swap •Gacha Weirdcore •SBI x dragon!Sabre •WTWM Bad End •Catboy!Sabre •Color Change!Reverse •TFC!Elan •SkeleModern (drm) • Urban Legends •WTF!Sabre •Migraine AU •Dot Eyes •Haunted Dolls •Relationship Problems •Uncanny Alien •Planetheads •Potato/Carrot (ocs) •AR x RQ •Changing With My Imagination •Center Of The Freakshow •Eldritch POVs • RQ x SL •Happy Place Hub •TR x Nimona •One Last Chance Before Our Demise •Warforged •Hello Puppets •Reformed Villains •Imprisoning Infection •Apocalypse Survivors •Sky Voices •TR Elite's Return •RQ Roleswap x TR •Star-Rats •Diamond Mafia •God Application •Earthly War Crimes (ocs) •Would You Love Me If I Was A Worm (drm) •FMS x DSMP •Alien Or Human? (drm) • Shadow Child (drm) •An Angel's Death Wish (drm)

Dream-Based AUs/Concepts (76 AUs)

•Generic Simpsons Crossover •Medieval Simpsons Gore •Steve Summer Camp •Desert House •Me/Sabre As Mike Afton •Gx/Vd IRL •Flooded World •SS!NM/TFTSMP!Karl •SS/RQ Monster AU •How Isn't This A Nightmare •Twisted Parkour •New Steves ft. Ranboo (ocs) •Girl Posse VS. Steves •Branch Legs •Lava Rainbow •Music Video ft. Grandmas •The Red Eyes (ocs) •RQ x OSMP Ft. Various Demon Cats • Shapeshifting Imagination •Fix Before • Abandoned Mall •Guardian Is Ripped AF •The Dead Kings •Dungeon Crawler •Ruined City ft. SBI •Girl Fight ft. Eldritch Abomination (oc) •Weird Alien Carrot •I'm Colle •Dolls w/ Reds •Befriend VR Sabre •Interview Show •Crafting Dead •TR Planet •Sideways Void •Trapped Sequel •Become Dragon •Failed 7 Colors •Contact Via MP3 Player •Tricolor Jester/Apocalypse (oc) •LOTB Chicken •Steves At Mall •Haunted Mushrooms •WTF Emily (oc) •Prof. Red In Costco •Companion Adventure • Camping Race •Board Game •Psychiatrist/Colle's Ghost •Pathetic Baby Bord •Figurines/Power Levels •Cosplay/Basketball •Fruits •Camping w/ Origin •Dystopia Costco •TR Elite IRL• Rock Concert •Deku Floating Gloves •Dark Sun •I'm TR Assistant •Steve Comm Post (Normal) •Necromancer/Kirishima •Unrecognizable •Cashiers •Bad Intentions •Catnap/ATLA/SpongeBob •MLP/Jesus/OCs •Whirlpool Facecam •Barbie Dolls •Bedroom Balancer (oc) •Sps Sabre Sci-Fi Movie •Fake Blue On Earth •Gen Loss Implied •Genderswamp (oc) •Steven Universe/MHA/Steves At ComicCon •Seer/Colle/SS Galaxy Classmates •Steve Saga Mobile Game

Changelog 10/7/24:

<Added 3 AUs> •Apocalypse Alien (drm) •Time and Elemental's Adventure (drm) •Keep The Memories Alive (ocs)

<Changed 2 AU names> Cryptid Sabre->Cave Monsters, Tired Eyes->Blindfold-centric AU Collection.

[a-town-called-hometown]

hi!! i loved your post about deltarune's metafiction and its (not) escapist themes, and it got my brain jogging, like... i guess ive just been thinking "why"? like ive heard that take before and i think its valid, but also like. why ? its obvious enough to me that deltarune uses the lightner/darkner relationship as a reflection of the player/game relationship and both of these things are addressed critically, but i can't help but wonder if there's a driving force for it all, outside of deltarune. like i can accept diegetically the darkners are not, or shouldn't be, subject only to the whims of lightners, but with any good story if you break it down to its core is ultimately saying something about humanity or the world and such. i mean i seriously doubt the people who seem to think that Toby Fox intends to induce *actual* guilt into the people who fund his life's work and career by purchasing his videogames, like, it's obvious that "you are a bad person because you play this videogame" isn't the intended message, nor was it in undertale. but then, what is? what is the purpose of a story that invites us to think of toys and game characters as "real"? not to trash my beloveds but i mean, literally speaking, their lives DONT matter, they r not real. it just feels like ive seen a lot of discussion about 'what' toby is doing with the narrative but i feel like that's only half the ordeal, the other half would be the reason why. my first thought was that the implicit 3rd thing being compared to the light-dark, player-game thing is actual social hierarchy IRL in which people are oppressed by another group that doesnt see them as human, bc iirc toby talked a bit about feeling powerless and wanting to do more to change the real world on real issues in an interview in 2020ish and of course there's the snarky gag about the fedora plugboy who doesn't like politics, so he doesn't care that an evil ruler is taking over the world. im not sure if that sits right with me as what the intention is (esp because the latter is a darkner talking about another darkner) but i couldnt think of much else although i do feel like a fallacy people get themselves into a lot in the fandom is the assumption that toby fox is this Impeccable Writing Machine and not just like A Guy. people make weird or flawed art sometimes, it doesn't *have* to adhere to standards. maybe deltarune is meaningless (or the meaning IS that it's meaningless, as though to complete the metaphor of it being a "real" fictional world, because if it is 'real' then like our world there is no "answer" or "purpose", it simply *is*.) dunno! im not expecting it to boil down to a simplistic fairytale moral like "dont bully people!!" or something, mr. fox tends to write more convoluted than that, but i feel like if there's something to be gained from this particular part of the game's story then i'm not sure i see the vision. what do u think? do u think this question is even answerable with only two chapters?

respectfully, I do heavily disagree with the notion that good stories necessarily have to say anything about the world or about humanity. one of the reasons I like metafiction is that it usually says something about how stories are constructed, and that's enough for me. there's plenty of stories that have bigger themes that aren't really all that much about human nature, at least, not directly. a story can comment on one specific thing without necessarily making a broader statement about people, you know? not every story has an easily explained moral lesson.

that being said, yes, this plot element is in service of deltarune's larger themes! which are about agency, control, fate, and identity.

deltarune's fate theming and its metafiction elements are a bit of a chicken-and-egg situation given how interlocked they are, but I've found it helpful to describe deltarune as a "person vs. fate narrative that uses a metafictional lens to characterize fate." rather than the three fates of greek mythology or whatever dictating its characters' lives, it is instead the structure of the rpg their world was made to be. they are player characters. they are npcs. they play specific roles in the narrative. no one can choose who they are in this world.

control is emphasized in this story. there's the control we have over kris, of course, and in a much subtler way the control we have over the world through them. there's the darkner-lightner hierarchy, which parallels our dynamic with kris. i would argue that there are even social forces in hometown which also serve to place the lightner characters into specific roles. under this level of control, it's hard for characters to push back and determine their own identities.

all these forces combine to mean that deltarune's characters are fighting back against the narrative itself! which says stuff about people's agency, and the way rpgs are written, and how we interact with all that...

ultimately, you can apply this to real life. even if there aren't things like "fictional people who are actually real," hierarchies of control do exist in real life. narratives that erase the agency and internality of certain types of people exist in real life. it's admittedly a rather general statement, but like with any narrative about fate, seeing characters resist rules that are seemingly written into the fabric of their existence can make you feel inspired to also define your own identity! and to be transgender. don't forget to be transgender

[theskee]

One of the funniest experiences I've ever had with The Purity Police in fandom on AO3 happened a couple years ago and every so often I remember that it happened and get a little laugh out of it all over again. I thought I'd share it today. Here's what happened: I wrote a fic tagged with an incestuous pairing and *only* that incestuous pairing. In the additional tags were the following things (after some general additional characters and setting details like "time travel):

Incest, identity fuckery, Accidental Incest, Underage Smoking, Underage Drinking, Underage Sex, Porn With Plot, Kinky, Violence, Sexual Frustration, Daddy Issues, Daddy Kink, Face Slapping, Embarrassment

This person commented on one of the early chapters that they liked a loose concept of a paradox created in the time travel element of the fic. Fast forward to a few days later on the FINAL CHAPTER OF THE FIC the following comment:

I feel like the fking incest tag should be like the first one?! Like what the actual fuck. I had hope that [the younger character's] crush would be handled in a mature non problematic non incest and appropriate way and that incest wasn't the literal endgame. I was severely mistaken. Stories containing incest arent inherently bad its how they are handled what makes them bad. This is genuenly disgusting. Remeber kids, incest is never okay or morally acceptable irl and if romanticized also harmful in media. I never wished to remove my kudos from something so badly ever before

My friend in fandom what did you think was gonna happen when the SINGLE PAIRING TAGGED WAS AN INCESTUOUS PAIRING?? What did you think INCEST followed by LOTS OF SEXUAL RELATED KINKY TAGS was gonna net you? WHY DID YOU KEEP READING IT? rEmEmBeR kIdS!~ INCEST IS BAD!!!! I had never previously encountered someone commenting on my works in such a manner before and when I tell you I laughed, uproariously, because it was absolutely a Dead Dove: Do Not Eat moment in the most explicit of ways. I cannot for the life of me figure out how they even found this fic if they didn't go looking for it, the pairing itself is hardly what one would call a juggernaut in the fandom, especially for a piece of media spanning over 30 years with hundreds of characters who get shipped together. (Though incest is relatively prevalent in this fandom because all the "main" characters over the years are from the same bloodline.) Here was my response, for anyone who wants to see how seriously I took this (see: I did not take it seriously at all).

oh god you're sooooo right. incest is so bad irl that's why i only engage with fictional incest! and tag it!! so no one has to read it if they don't like it or have the media literacy to engage with it in a nuanced and thoughtful way. i hope you find a [the incestuous pairing] fic without incest that suits your tastes good luck but my advice would be, if you see something tagged with an incestuous pairing that's marked as Explicit, and then in the additional tags there's also the "incest" and "accidental incest" tags plus "porn with plot" or "daddy kink" or "underage sex" maybe you should actually assume that the fic is what it says it is. you'll upset your tummy a lot less. hope this helps! :)

Anyway. Remember kids! The tags are there to tell you what's in the fic! Not the author's clever bait and switch to get you to read something morally pure!

[eeveestarstudios-blog]

Tell me EVERYTHING about ALL your ocs

Oh GOD we'd be here for like 5 days because I counted and I have like...40?? I'll tell you about the main 5 and if you have any questions then you can ask about a specific thing. They all own Pokémon btw!! Also they are star protectors of a specific element, but that's for another post. I'm not gonna say LITERALLY everything but if you have questions please ask! This will be about the 5 main ocs and a very brief description about them! Next will be their teams!

Eevee: Eevee is kinda like my sona despite being almost nothing like me irl! She's a 13 year old who lives and was born in unova! She's probably the most unserious, and she often seems like she is less phased by things, but it's really just a mask over her fear of being rejected over her gender identity and depression. She wants to focus on her art and one day move to artazon, paldea. She's the dark star protector (NO THATS NOT EVIL. CORRUPTION IS THE EVIL ONE!!)

Toast: Toast is the youngest one in the group at 12 years old! She came with her dad from Paldea to expand their little bakery business (it's a family business!) She is usually extremely timid and shy, but her cute little bread face somehow attracts attention! (I'd be attracted to her lil bread face too 🥺) Another notable thing about Toast is that she has the extremely rare ability to see ghosts (despite being extremely terrified by ghosts...) poor Toast is constantly being attracted by all things she is afraid of, whether it's a ghost or a corrupt, and unfortunately, nobody belives her. She's the fire star protector.

Nessie: Nessie is a 14 year old escaped experiment from a lab in Hoenn. Not much is known about them, because they prefer not to be seen in front of any media that will cause the same people who captured them long ago when they wasn't a stitched up abomination. They are on the run, but seeing the abundance of anomalies just like them caused them to settle down for a while. Excitable, curious, yet quite the overthinker, Nessie was a surprisingly great friend and addition to Eevee's group! She's the water star protector!

Prism: Prism is 15 and lives in Kanto, but she likes to go to Unova via uploading her consciousness to her body that is stationed there. She's Eevee's biggest rival, and one of the reasons is that she's an ai (sort of. It's kinda like the vocaloids ig??) She is often found singing her favorite songs, or questioning her existence. She's very serious sometimes, which kinda makes her cringe at Eevee's unusually unserious nature. Being overwhelmingly blunt and even bullying Eevee sometimes has caused her to feel lonely and misunderstood, but when she's performing, it seems like all that worry and anger disappear into nothing. She's the light star protector!

K.K: (that's not his real name) K.K is a 15 year old who was also born and raised in Unova! After a horrible accident, he was sent to live at an orphanage with his little sister. Unable to obtain a therapist, he started a band with Prism and some of the other children in the orphanage to let out his sadness and loss into his unnaturally upbeat music (think of like kikuo songs ig) He constantly wears a mask on his face to hide his burns that came from the accident. He has become a little protective, especially over his band mates and sister, because his trauma has given him an intense fear of loss. His mysterious persona and captivating music makes him quite amazing really... he's the Natural star protector!

And we're done!! I'm gonna update with the other ocs later!!! Bye!!

[the-resurrection-3d]

Decided to post the essay I wrote a few days ago. Of course, this isn't meant to shit on anyone, but to work through my feelings on TOH's themes and how I see the fandom working through them.

TOH has a very – let’s say uneasy relationship with its fantasy elements—or at least, that’s how the fandom has received them. I just saw someone talking about how Luz shouldn’t have gotten a Palisman of her own because she “doesn’t need to look any more like Azura,” considering that Luz’s whole thing at the beginning of the series was needing to better “tell fantasy from reality.” But I feel like that’s only getting half the point—the issue with not being able to tell fantasy from reality rests, as the series argues, with expecting the world to cater to you and then lashing out when it doesn’t.

The series makes this most clear with Belos, who rejects the traditional high fantasy genre signifiers as spiritual pollutants and yet is living in as much of a fantasy world as Luz was. “[He needs] to be the hero of his own delusion” locates Belos’s major flaw—in a character way and in a thematic way—in his refusal to see himself as just another part of the world, rather than its center. All of this is spoken to us directly by the embodiment of the Boiling Isles and its magic. This character flaw is then reinforced by how Belos gets defeated and starts rambling on about how humans are innately “better than this” Because Reasons.

I think part of this disconnect might be happening because we’re used to anti-escapist stories rejecting the fantasy world in its entirety. For example, Ready Player One ends with the reveal that the creator of the VR world—it was called the OASIS, wasn’t it?—regretted not spending enough time in the “real world,” and the main character rectifies this by enforcing a weekly one-day service outage. Even though the book explores reasons why people would want to escape into the VR fantasy, including escaping the confines of marginalized identity categories like gender and race, it still asserts that you’re missing out by leaving the “real world” behind. I think also of modern fantasy stories with creatures like vampires and werewolves that bend over backwards to justify why being a human is still totally the best option— “Be glad of your human heart, Feyre,” and so on. Even in series where the human main character becomes inhuman, it’s often through force—characters like Feyre and Elena Gilbert are killed and then revived as monsters, but only Bella Swan actively wants to become one. (It really is the equal-but-opposite response to the question Robert McRuer says is asked of disabled people IRL in his article about compulsory able-bodiedness: “Yeah, but in the end, wouldn’t you rather be like me?” In both cases—whether disabled or super-abled—the normate, abled, “regular” human position has to be reinforced as the ideal.)

And let’s be real, it’s all cope. We can agree it’s just cope, right? But even besides that, I think we also need to keep in mind that, contrary to what internet discourse would have you believe, subverting tropes is not good writing in and of itself — subversion and deconstruction need to be ways of creating meaning within the work, rather than the meaning itself.

I think, then, we can see TOH’s conversation with escapism from s1 to s3 as a way of asking, “What parts of our childhood should we keep?” In Luz’s case, like in many of our own childhoods, the fantasy elements are from the actual fantasy genre because Luz wants to imagine a bigger life for herself than Earth allows, one that is scary and dangerous but in the end still caters to her/us. (See also Freud’s concept of the family romance, wherein a child dreams that their parents aren’t their “real” parents and that their “real” parents are magic space fairy royalty who will one day reclaim their child and everything will be awesome forever.)

In episodes like “Witches Before Wizards,” these genre signifiers provide Luz with a set kind of “script” for how she believes interactions should go—the disappointment and restlessness she feels in the episode is from the fact that it’s not catered to her just because she’s there, in a similar way that Belos believes humans are better just Because They Are. Worth noting that even in that episode, the “reality” Luz needs to learn to accept is still based in a fantasy setting—signaling that the word “fantasy” in “differentiate fantasy from reality” should not be about the genre or the act of consuming fantasy in and of itself. Season three then literalizes this with The Collector turning people into puppets and acting out “The Owl House” as a game with suffering participants.

Conversely, season three adds more nuance by revealing that Luz’s hyperfixation stems from her relationship with her father. The season does a lot to explore the relationship-building potential of fiction, from Amity suggesting her and Luz dress as Hecate and Azura to the reveal that Camila is a secret Trekkie.

A fellow autistic person once described their special interest not just as something they’re obsessed with, but as part of how they processed the world. We can see this kinda play out in Camila’s conversation with Luz right before Stringbean hatches: she says she has forgotten the “Astral Oath” and responds to Luz’s question of her being a “secret nerd” with the admission that she shouldn’t have let her own fears of and experiences with being non-conforming compel her to try and change Luz. The Astral Oath and how it played out within Cosmic Frontier provided a framework for Camila that she admits she should have followed: “My biggest mistake was trying to protect you by changing this beautiful, good witch into something she wasn’t.” The best things about Luz are also the things that make her more drawn to the fantasy genre.

The rampant egoism of the genre should be left behind, the show says, but not the good lessons and the relationships you’ve built from it.

This anti-egoism does, of course, run up against the fact that Luz is still the main character. If Luz getting a Palisman makes her too much like Azura and therefore undermines the message, then honestly I don’t see how the final battle itself isn’t just a colossal fuck-up. Not even in the sense that Luz got Titan magic, which I have seen people say is now suddenly Luz being A Chosen One all along, but in the sense that Luz straight up shouldn’t have been in the final battle at all. (Honestly, if you want YA with a good anti-egoism message imparted through its structure, you’re looking for Robert Cormier’s The Chocolate War—book, not movie.)

I said on Twitter while I was reading Charlie Ledbetter’s “The Dysphoric Body Politic” that TOH has an interesting relationship with its escapism messaging because Luz DOES leave the human world. Even though she had to finish high school in the human world, the finale makes it clear that she’s been putting all of her spare energy and labor into the literal rebuild of the Boiling Isles. She entirely gives up on making a life for herself on Earth.

This isn’t super surprising, (I was always sure it would happen) but I do think it’s where the uneasiness—the messiness—between TOH and its genre comes into play. Yes, Luz needed to dial back her daydreaming and yes, her being in the demon realm ultimately led to it almost being destroyed, but it still is the worst possible ending if she doesn’t get to stay there.

In the article, Ledbetter, a transmasc who discovered themselves through fandom, writes that “Escapism is not a departure from reality. Rather, escape decenters the hegemony of oppressive systems that announce themselves as real and creates space to imagine alternatives.” And yet within the show, it’s a closed circuit—the threat to diversity and self-expression comes from the human realm, and yet there is no attempt to save it. Ledbetter, writing of fandom’s political potential, suggests using fanfic to imagine alternatives specifically so we can give ourselves the drive to try and enact them in the real world.

TOH’s sister show, Amphibia, gives us a taste of this in its finale: in the ten years since the Calamity Trio has left, the once-evil king lives out his final days planting seeds, and the girls themselves are dedicated to either educating others or creating art. They honor the memories of their childhood fantasy—Sasha with two crossing swords as a patch on her jacket and a charm dangling from her rearview mirror, Anne with her entire career—but the portal is closed. It’s not coming back.

Given everything TOH does in season three to reaffirm the value of fantasy as a lifelong interest, though, I think what it wanted to avoid suggesting, like a lot of traditional portal stories do, that the fantasy world is the world of childhood and needs to be escaped. Aslan tells Peter and Susan, after all, that they’re getting too old for Narnia. Peter and his siblings return there only in death; Susan isn’t so lucky. If Luz shouldn’t have gotten a Palisman, something which symbolizes she’s discovered a fundamental truth about herself and has “earned” her place as a Witch, then honestly she shouldn’t have been able to come back to the Boiling Isles, either. How many of us would've been happy with that?

If we want to square this with the show’s politics, I think we can read this as the show saying that, yes, there are some things you have to do as a child, but once you’re free, you aren’t obligated to stay with the society and people who won’t ever see you for who you are. In a way, Luz going back and forth between the human and demon realms parallels the teenage fantasy fan, making space in their lives for fandom as a place of joy and connection after all the boring hard “adult” work is done for the day. You don’t have to leave it behind; building outside of the system and making your life centered around your joy is hard work, yes, but worth doing.

[evegwood]

I was rereading your breakdown of the playlists and I was kind of intrigued by how you outright stated that David's insecurities are not related to his transness but to the power things - because, like, I don't think it's all meant to be a 1:1 metaphor, but specfic stories like that exist very much in conversation with more mundane issues people face so that distinction stood out to me? (cont.)

(cont.) Like, people such as David get detained in places that feel and work and look like the institutions in Inhibit IRL for various non-specfic reasons, and stories like this are a bit of a dialogue with these issues, especially one like this that goes into the mundane little miseries of it all. Would it be correct to say that that was your way of saying "I don't want people to reduce his character entirely to transness"? Thanks, love the comic!

Hey that's a good question! For sure there are real-world counterparts to a lot of the themes of Inhibit, but specifically when it comes to my queer characters I wanted the story to be completely neutral about their queerness. I do have a lot of thoughts on this so this might be long haha. Hopefully I cover everything I want to cover, I wrote this whole thing out and then hit ctrl+z to delete a line and Tumblr deleted the entire post without letting me ctrl+y because this is a working website that doesn't suck ass. I had to retype it all so I'm sorry if any of it is disconnected, I couldn't remember the exact order I said everything argh ANYWAY

When I started writing Inhibit I didn't realise I was trans, and then I came out as nonbinary, and then I started to transition, so I've had a whole spectrum of thinking "how should I handle transness in this comic?" over my time working on it. Pretty early on I decided that none of the characters would suffer because of being trans, they wouldn't have any anxiety about it, other characters wouldn't treat them differently etc; the story takes place in a world where superpowers are real, so it wouldn't be crazy for transness to also just be normal and accepted there lmao

However now I think that this is a pretty reductive way to represent the trans experience. Like it or not, being trans informs almost everything about you, and I didn't let my trans characters have that nuance. Vic being a white, seemingly cis* seemingly het** dude is pretty central to his character arc***, so actually examining queerness in this society would have been interesting. There was room to do that; something that is canon and just has never come up is that Urquhart sponsors their trans officers' HRT etc so they don't need to go through the NHS, meaning those officers are reliant on Urquhart long past their service. You're right: what would a conversation between the mundane and fantastical elements of Inhibit look like? I, 2023 Eve, would like to have that conversation! But this far into the story, I kinda missed the train on it.

* he uses any pronouns, he is shrug-gender ** he is bi *** spoilers wow he is privileged actually

I honestly think that I haven't done a good job at highlighting my trans characters, particularly for an audience that doesn't expect to see trans characters. I don't think I've done David and Masha justice as trans characters beyond little nods that readers could miss or not even understand, and there are some characters whose nonbinary/trans identities have just never been mentioned (Holly is nb, Jezza and Toby are trans - again just hasn't come up because of scenes and lines changing or being cut, there's so much that you can't fit into a story even when it's as long as this). So to finally answer your question, it isn't that I didn't want people to reduce David to his transness, because I don't think there's enough of his transness in the comic for that to even happen. I don't think anyone reads Inhibit and thinks oh yeah, David, you know, the trans one. It really was that at the time of writing the playlist breakdowns, I was firm that none of the Inhibit characters had anxiety or neuroses about being trans. Instead, all their neuroses were about their superpowers, because that's the fun angst.

Now looking back on Inhibit, there is actually an excruciating amount of evidence for the story kind of being a trans narrative ("oh god i can't control my own body oh god", "oh no people think my body should do this thing" etc). It's so interesting how creators have these themes that they continuously go back to in their work, even unintentionally, and mine is oops all trans. If I were to rewrite Inhibit from scratch now, I'd probably try to include more of that nuance and actually engage with those themes because I realise that they're there haha.

I hope all this answers your question? Kind of? A little? My ultimate conclusion is that I thought what I was doing was writing good trans characters, when ultimately I think I failed to write characters that are truly explicitly trans. On the other hand, maybe characters like David and Masha are the exact kind of trans rep that some people want and are looking for. Either way I'm actively working to write better trans characters in the future because trans people rule, and this was a really interesting question to reflect on, thank you!

[mareenavee]

Writerly (And Artistic) Thumbprint Challenge!

I was tagged by the lovely @hannahcbrown to try this out!

Rules: look back on your work, both past and present, finished and unfinished. what are five (or more!) narrative elements, themes, topics or tropes that continuously pop up in your work?

I'm gonna tag a few fine feathered folks for this, and let them circulate it out to the rest of the mutuals and see what we can come up with :3

Tagging: @paraparadigm, @changelingsandothernonsense, @friend-of-giants, @oblivions-dawn, @thana-topsy, @saltymaplesyrup, @thequeenofthewinter, @rhiannon1199, @tallmatcha, @airiat, @the-storytellers-seer, @orfeoarte -- and more. If you are not tagged, please, do absolutely consider yourself tagged and tag me back. And always tag the mutuals even if they've already been tagged. Pile on the tags so we can all see the cool stuff we each come up with. (:

Under the cut for some observations.

I have written a lot over the years and most of it is not fic, but here is what I can observe from original, fic, poetry and nonfiction. These are in no particular order, though I saved the best for last.

Identity I like to write about what makes a person themselves. A lot of my early spoken word poetry talked about body image and how to exist in a world like ours as a person who is not considered thin. Some of my favorite nonfiction pieces discussed what it was like to be a college student working retail and being recognized as other-than-a-retail-worker in public and how identity shifts between roles. In my fic, I explore a few things like what makes a hero a hero? Who are you when change/fate/destiny upends everything you've ever known? How do you become the person you're supposed to be?

Strength Especially in a lot of my fic, posted or otherwise, I think this crops up perhaps almost as much as identity. What does it mean to be strong? What sort of events do we weather and get to the other side of it? For who are we strong? Is being strong the same as being brave? What kinds of strength do we need in our daily lives and how does it affect our decisions? In the fic, we see a lot of the strength to overcome adversity by nature of the quest. But we also see, which dives into another point, the strength to forgive, the strength to confront ourselves for our behavior, and the strength to move forward, even when it hurts.

Friendship Ah, the power of friendship :> But no, even in a lot of my fic WIP ideas and fragments, there's a lot to be said of relationships within fiction that show different kinds of love and support than what is expected of a certain pairing or tag. There are a ton of different expressions of love, and I think one of the most underutilized is strong, solid friendships. This also incorporates found family or portraying a group of people who have decided against all odds that they will go out of their way for one another regardless of circumstances. When I write good friendships, I do it because it reminds me irl that we are worthy of this kind of support and we are capable of giving this kind of support, and not everything has to be as one-dimensional as popular media can sometimes show. Fic is the perfect place to explore it because it's decoupled from marketing, generally, and we don't have to worry too much about what sells (: So I lean into it where and when I can.

Mistakes This one is kind of rather broad. I could have listed specific kinds of mistakes but then we'd be here forever LOL but suffice to say I do write flawed characters that don't always know the next right thing. In my poetry, I talked about the mistakes I've made and observed in my time. I have given some of the mistakes I've made and observed to my characters in original and especially in World. Part of this category though is asking the question of how do these mistakes affect others? What does it take to forgive? Can they be forgiven, and why or why not? Is the character flaw so deep that there is no redemption for them? Are there certain kinds of mistakes that change who a person is completely? What is the cost of forgiveness? There's a lot to play with in this category without even having to get down to specifics. :>

Hope This is my favorite thing to write into any of my work ever. Perhaps because real life can be so very difficult and can seem so very bleak sometimes. Combined with everything above, I absolutely write hope into things, even if my stories seem rather bleak at the outset. For World, all of my POV characters have bits and pieces of tragedies that I have had to endure in my life and it's extremely cathartic to see them get through their drama, hardship, grief, self-inflicted chaos, and other things. Because it reminds me that there is hope yet for this place, if there is hope in their world. It is a form of healing for me to put them in situations they can get out of. So hope. The most important theme, I think, for my writing. (:

[hautsreadsmarvel]

The very first issue of the uncanny X-Men! (1963)

Much like the first F4 issue or the first Spider-Man issue, I want to give this its own spotlight.

After a strong start and several issues’ worth of straight fire from Spider-Man, I was ready for the first X-Men issue to also knock my socks off.

That... did not happen.

We’ll start w the cover. Despite keeping a running track of cover scenes that don’t happen, I don’t actually mind when that occurs; I'm just thrown off by...

Is that foot guy supposed to be Beast? (I do know at least the X-Men that appear in the movies). He wasn’t always furry!?

Why is Iceman’s go-to attack slinging snowballs? Are they filled w rocks or something?

Magneto is deflecting eyebeams and snowballs, implying that his magnetism obeys the unspoken rule of the Marvelverse that magnetism is basically just telekinesis* (tho Jean’s power is described in this very issue as “telekinesis” and is therefore different).

Is, is Iceman, sorry is he pole dancing? What is he supposed to be depicted as doing in that panel?

Ok, I have some criticisms, but I’d like to start with the things I did like in this issue. The X-Men training sequence at the start is pretty cool; I’m always a sucker for people training and investigating their powers. Also, apparently the X-Men need to train to receive Xavier’s thoughts; this possibly indicates that increasing the baseline clarity of his own projective telepathy is something Xavier himself could train, but it also makes for a fun little detail in “psychic physics”. The way Angel says “Mistakes are for homo sapiens, sir…” is real cute. And all the X-Men get their chances to show off.

As for the criticisms, Iceman and Beast are nigh-identical to Torch and Thing, respectively, in terms of temperament and even power classifications/roles. A big hulking tough guy who engages in fake-angry banter w a younger elemental kinetic w tangentially-related extra asspull powers who’s itching for action.

Magneto is just villainous for villain reasons, and seeks to take over the Earth by demolishing military bases (and forcibly causing total nuclear disarmament, hooray)! Also his magnetokinesis is just TK, it can repulse human limbs and interact w/ Cyclops’ eyebeam.

“Democracy’s silent sentinels” oh you mean the fucking apocalypse device that, on use, renders not just a specific stretch of the human planet uninhabitable but also slightly increases the global cancer rate? Say, when you put it that way, this democracy thing doesn’t sound all that great! (Is this the most intense military glazing in Marvel comics? No, that still belongs to Iron Man. However, this sounds fucking ridiculous like do you hear yourself??)

Iceman pulls a power out of his ass, in that he can throw heat-seeking snowballs

And then there’s the Jean introduction segment. Xavier introduces her as /a most attractive young lady!/ and then everyone except Iceman has this reaction multiple times thru-out the comic:

Say, I heard something about Iceman coming out as gay like a decade ago. It’s interesting to see a potential seed for that planted here. Also, Slim Summers!? I’m glad it gets changed to Scott… yeesh.

*Blarg*. Thank you Bobby, coming in clutch with the “kys” - waitafuckingsecond he literally IS just the Torch personality in different hardware.

Thankfully, unlike Sue, Jean doesn’t take this crap lying down. However I would still like to read less such frivolous, pointless page count-bloating sexism in the future.

Neither a complaint nor a praise, but it is interesting that while Professor X introduces the idea that the mundanes would be fearful of mutants, the military men whose base the X-Men rescue do not fear or loathe the X-Men at any point, even when they don’t know who they are or get inconvenienced by their various mutant powers.

Overall, this issue wasn’t bad, but like I said at the top I was kind of expecting it to be higher-quality.

* It makes a teensy bit of sense from a writer’s perspective. Magnetism is an irl and easy-to-demonstrate example of objects acting on each other w/o touching, so if you need a “sciency” word for your pulp mag to describe telekinesis but don’t want the “psychic” or “spiritual” baggage of that word, then magnetism works. Of course, these days psychics and tk are staples of soft science-fiction, but maybe even as late as the 60s that wasn’t the case?

[despair-to-future-arcs]

With another episode wrapped up, I must start this review by saying that the critique post I mentioned a while back is yet to be completed. A lot of irl stuff got in the way of me organizing that properly so I apologize for the wait, though you did say it will be a while until the next episode starts, Maybe I'll make it in time! It's also worth mentioning that I will not be talking about the new format of therapy sessions in this review, as we haven't completed any of the ones shown in this updated format yet and I want to see one in full before talking about them, so my thoughts on them will probably stay for once the next episode wraps up. But allow me to give you a small teaser; I am enjoying what I'm seeing!

Onto the review itself: My biggest issue with this episode is that it felt like it took a while to actually “start”. We spent so much time in Jabberwock with the remnants or Nagi and that at one point I thought “Ok, this is the episode.” Which would have been fine mind you, as I don't dislike build up pieces and we are essentially wrapping up the first “Arc” of sorts in this blog and starting anew so if it really was just that it would have been fine by me. In fact I actually quite enjoyed a lot of elements this initial segment had; it was fun seeing all the new designs for the Remnants of despair for the new identity and seeing them interacting with other characters was quite refreshing as well, Nagito finally getting that reality check from no one other than the Hope man himself who even loses a bit of his cool when dealing with him, I also enjoyed the development on Nagi and how she's dealing with her feelings about having divine luck and also regarding her old classmates, coming to terms with the fact that even if they were in a bad situation themselves, they did hurt her and he has the right to feel upset over the fact. And I’m curious to see how Akane being a mentor of sorts for Nagi will affect how she feels about Sora whenever she comes to be, and speaking of her, I really like that you did there with her creation of instead of having a Sora from the getgo that just had bits of Akane sprinkled in she used to be an emotionless algorithm made to obey orders at all costs. It's a really neat way to elaborate on the character’s creation; Sora is not just Akane but instead a mixture of both things, with Algorithm being the “body” and Akane the “mind”. Really cool stuff!

And again, I would have been happy if this really was the entire episode, but then around halfway through we get a lot of new big things thrown at us; The reveal of the afterlife teather, Mayumi and Estu uncovering the files on he brother's computer, Nagi uncovering things about Utsuro’s past, some Remnants leaving to start working on the briefcases. Which is awesome, I loved all of that, but there's a noticeable pacing issue in the episode where it started off really slow and then increased the pace significantly with a lot of new information and as a result there were times where we hardly got to spend time to ask certain characters because everything was going so damn fast all of the sudden. I wish we could have talked more with Takaaki when he was talking about his life, with the Kisaragi foundation members at the reunion in regards to their search for Akane's body or Yoruko when she and Mio were on a call, but these scenes ended almost as fast as they began and that left me a little disappointed. This is also the reason why I believe some people were asking if the episode was close to ending when it was just around halfway through, pacing my friend! It affects a story more than you think. 

This is really my one big point of critique, however, there's another thing in this episode that personally bothers me a lot more than the pacing, but I'm not classifying it as it's biggest problem or even a problem in itself because my distaste for it is 100% PERSONAL OPINION, hence why I won't post that rant in this review and may not send it to the blog at all because it would just be me complaining about a writing trope I clearly have a bias against, it wouldn't be fair or valid criticism and the last thing I want is you altering the story because of the opinions of a guy who has a bone to pick with the trope and probably will keep disliking it regardless. If you want to hear it, I can send it, but otherwise I don't think I will. Though for those curious, the TLDR is; Critic anon hates ghosts. So don't expect me to go over any Afterlife teather segment or much less the WOH parent's ghost channeling adventures, those are straight up my least favorite segments in the entire story, in any of my reviews unless it's something I find of dire importance that needs to be mentioned. Akane and Nagi’s talks however will probably still be mentioned since they serve mainly as character development for both and not the trope that gets on my nerves that's present on the other 2 ghostly activity segments of the story. This isn't to say I'm just skipping over the other segments, I still go through them, I just won't talk about them.

So.. Let's get into some positives, shall we? I think my absolute favorite part of this whole episode was Mayumi and Estu starting their own little investigation on HPA’s dirth using the files on the late brother's computer. A strange one to have as a favorite I'm certain, but Mayumi is a character I really loved when she first got introduced and developed over in ASOOT so I'm ecstatic that we're finally gonna see more of her in here, being happy nonetheless! I feel like we hadn't seen her not tired, sad or stressed through the whole story so far, and seeing her interactions with Estu and how much they care and support one another is just so sweet! Their plotline is now by far one of the ones I'm looking forward to the most other than the briefcases, though I did though we would see them more in this episode, but I don't mind this being an overarching subplot in the slightest. If anything, that means there's much more of them to be seen and that's great news for me!

Now, the latter half of this episode was spent in what I like to call the Multi-missions, going in order; Nagi’s was the first and honestly the most fitting one for that too considering the scene prior; It was all about her learning more about Utsuro's family and upbringing which reminds of stories featuring orphaned MCs where they want to find out more about their bio families to figure out more about themselves in turn, only in Nagi's case she wants to know about the man who granted her life, which is even crazier considering that this same power could lead to her downfall, not because of the reversal as I doubt Nagi will use it carelessly like the voids, but more so because of the Kisaragi foundation and their “All devine luck users must die” policy. Which brings even more tension onto the Kisaragi foundation and Future foundation relationship whenever that gets found out by them, because let's be honest, at some point they'll figure it out and as of now I legitimately have no idea of what could happen then, truly only time will tell.

I really enjoyed what you did with Utsuro's family here, building on top of the simple backstory the original game provided with the addition of Yasuyuki and Sachiko in the mix. Honestly Yasuyuki is such a failure of a man it's almost fascinating to me, his discovery of divine luck unintentionally led to Utsuro's abuse and his parents shift into greedy, selfish monsters and when he finally went to step in it was already too late and in his search to help his grandson and fix even if just a little of this mess he failed to protect his granddaughter that he didn't even know existed! Wow. What a terrible life this guy lived. Sachiko is really interesting too because she is such a wildcard in this deck of insane characters she’s tied to one way or another, there are SO MANY ways you can go about this characters and things to do with her in story that I really have no idea what role she will play, hell, I can't even tell if she will be involved in the SDRA2 storyline or not given that Nagi plans to hide her existence from Void at all costs, but if she DOES get entangled with it that makes me wonder if she will be what sets the Future foundation after the Voids, if they try to break in and kidnap her for their reenactment but fail due to their luck reversal. But honestly? Whatever you do with this character, I think I will be invested no matter what. So needless to say, I am very much looking forward to learning more about her when the time comes.

Now, let's talk about the elephant in the room when it came to Nagi’s mission; the explosion she set off that almost sent Jiro and Midori straight to the Afterlife theater. Honestly, when that happened I was shocked at the immediate, exaggerated in my opinion, reaction from the anons. I didn't like it either, as I felt like the blowing up the place was overkill, but I thought that the fact would come back later down the line as in “Nagi was so caught up in her own goals that she almost got other's hurt in the process, kind of like the Voids do” which would serve as a moment of growth for the character where she realizes she realizes she needs to be more careful with this stuff, which is why I didn't immediately send an angry message about it. At the end of the day that's not REALLY what it was for, but that, alongside the stressful day, horrifying findings about Utsuro's family and Rei’s talk about how they're willing to put down any devine luck users on sight all culminate into Nagi having a breakdown on the way home where everything she's been dealing with through not only this episode but the whose series so far just becomes too much for her to handle and she just.. Can't keep it together anymore. And wow, what a scene. Call me sadistic, but I love seeing moments where main characters break down after all the adversities they've gone through, I just love when MCs are allowed to show vulnerability and receive help from others instead of being pure beacon of hope and goodness that never feel bad ever, so needless to say I really enjoyed the whole scene, especially as it felt like a fitting conclusion to Nagi's side of the multi-missions.

While Nagi's was by far the most well written out of the 4 multi-missions, my favorite one turned out to be Sonia and Gundham which was a huge surprise to me because I don't like either of these characters all that much nor did the mission they were going in sounded all that interesting to me. But I've already gone into detail about what I loved about this side of the multi-missions in a previous ask, so I don't feel like reiterating myself here. Instead, let me use this paragraph as a shout out to some other, minor, things I enjoyed in this mission which were the introduction to Haji’s mother, who I'm sure will develop more of a prominent role once we get closer to Satoko’s defeat since we will need her account to know more about the mess that was the Towa family, and Naoyuki and Masa’s blossoming relationship. I'm notoriously not a shipping guy, but these two do work really well together and I found it hilarious how the moment Naoyuki fell for Masa was as she threw Nikei’s dumbass into the pig pan, nothing short of iconic. Plus, with Naoyuki’s distaste for Hope's peak, his views towards the despair an Masa's dislike for the school and how the Future foundation operates, I think those two can help each other out much more than just on the relationship department, so I'm looking forward to see how their relationship develops.

Onto the third mission, this the one I was originally looking forward to the most but unfortunately I didn't end up liking it all that much, but honestly? This disappointment is almost entirely on me because when I saw that the mission was about shutting down the Killing festivals I thought we were going TO SEE an actual killing festival in the works, infiltrate the palace and stop it brawl style while arresting the despairs in charge and saving the participants. But instead, the characters actually headed straight to the Killing festival's headquarters to shut the whole operation down which.. Yeah, that's the most logical way to go about this, I should have seen this coming. But hey, my own expectations aside, what we did get in this mission was really good! I really liked how in order to help Nekomaru Akane had to work through biggest flaw; communication, in order to convince Juzo to move him to a proper health care facility so he can recover from the heart transplant. And speaking of Juzo, huge shout out to you for making me actually enjoy him for once! He's one of the characters I just sigh and look away whenever he's around because of his neverending “I'll beat the shit out of you” attitude to anything and everything, so seeing him NOT be so aggressive and actually understanding to Akane's family situation was SO GOOD to see, I absolutely adored the talk those two had about their families around the end of the mission because it showed a softer, more understanding side of Juzo and how even him is willing to at least listen to the Remnant’s stories and what led to them falling for Junko’s manipulation. 

Unfortunately, it was in this mission that the pacing issue I mentioned at the start of the review returned. By the time we were getting close to the Multi-missions and during the first two it returned to normal, which is in part what made those so enjoyable, but the speed picked back up here and it's a shame because I would have liked to spend a bit more time with the characters in this mission. I mean, we were introduced to this girl on the hoodie that kinda looks like an isolation suit in this very mission and she seemed like a pretty interesting character, but we spent so little time with her that I can't even remember her name, nor will I look it up as it strengthens my point. But the pacing was still manageable here in comparison to Peko and Fuyuhiko’s mission, which just went by IN A FLASH. And it's a shame because you had a lot of interesting things going on in it; From Kyosuke’s views different from Kinjo to Peko and Fuyuhiko’s relationship and ultimately the fate of her sentence. The first point is the worst offender of this entire mission because you made a point on how Kyosuke can make exceptions when it comes to certain despairs if their situation made it so that they had no complete agency over their fate, actively comparing it to Tsurugi's “All criminals are scum and must die” Ideology, but that part was over really fast which is a shame especially since it comes back later when the topic of exempting Peko from her sentence comes up since she was never given the chance to be her own person in the clan.

This was SUCH AN INTERESTING point to explore, but we barely saw it because Tsurugi was only around for ONE POST. One post! We didn't even got to talk to him ourselves or see more of how his and Munakata’s views clash and differ from one another because the dude appeared and went away in the same fucking post, and I genuinely don't understand why this was done from a writing standpoint. Why couldn't we have had Tsurugi and his division show up a little while before the missions actually starts so we can get to ask them a couple things before the operation begins and then get to talk with them for a little longer once it's done? This is exactly how Teruya's division was handled in the farm mission, so why couldn't we have had it here? It just gives me the impression that you were rushing to get these missions over with and that's a shame because I was looking forward to seeing a longer discussion between Tsurugi and Kyosuke play out. Wasted potential aside, at least this mission didn't end on a bad note as I did quite enjoy its conclusion. With Fuyuhiko's reaction to Peko's Natsumi training dummies being a lot tamer than most expected, which shows how he's becoming much more of a level headed guy, and how he cares for Peko to the point he's willing to take in all her crimes so that she can be a free woman, even if that means they won't see each other again. It's bittersweet but shows how he genuinely cares for her and that was quite nice.

With the multi-missions over with, allow me to go over some miscellaneous things we saw during their aftermath which I found worth noting. For one, I really liked that we got to spend some time with the Kisaragi foundation, I feel like those guys get a lot of crap because of one bad apple in their rankings, and there were a few of the OC characters we didn't see much of or hadn't been introduced before that I really enjoyed seeing here. The round of applause goes to; Benitsuru Ando, Katsuteru “Terry” Higa and Fukumi Iranami!

Following the order, with what we had been told of Benitsuru’s character prior I was under the impression that she would be much more of a sadder, gloomy and quiet type kid, but then we actually got to see her through Hikaru’s flashback and boy was I wrong! Little Beni is.. Surely something! I'll tell you that. Is she a brat like a few anons had been saying? Maybe? I don't think it's fair to judge her entire personality from a single scene where she's clearly upset, but even if her general personality leans more towards the annoying side, I'm definitely looking forward to seeing more of her as the thing I'm really curious to see on this character is less about Benitsuru herself, but instead what she repents: She's the youngest character in the story, more specifically a child that grew up after the tragedy, so I'm very curious to see how growing up after the literal apocalypse affects someone's mentality and upbringing considering a lot of things that may seem crazy to someone who had seen the world before the tragedy may appear normal for someone who hasn't seen anything BUT the tragedy their whole life.

Now onto the older folks, Terry surprised me quite a bit too as before this little moment I just assumed he was a shit sibling who acts like he's the best guy around for being smarter. While he's definitely quite rough with not only Noah but others he interacts with, it feels more like a tough love situation where he seems to care for these people deep down but won't be soft with them in any manner when it comes to telling them what he thinks, which is sometimes what they need to hear. As mean as he was towards Hikaru when telling him to step up as a father, even if his opinions are biased due to his experience having to raise his siblings for his parents, that's a push he needed to get in his mind that he needs to work towards this change in his family dynamic instead of just going “Well, it's Kinjo’s fault” and lowering his head. Fukumi is another character of which my opinions have been shifting ever since she was introduced. When we first met her I thought she was just gonna be an asshole that brags about how amazing she is all the time, but I gotta admit, I found her stupid funny In every scene she's been in thus far, and I'm glad to see her relationship with Keisuke, and by extension her siblings, is a lot more nuanced than just her being a bitch like i originally thought. With Keisuke being incredibly rude to her, going as far as telling others to ignore her, when Fukumi isn't actually all that bad. Though I am hesitant to believe her story so far, as “I'm just naturally awesome and my siblings hated me for it” feels a biiiiiiiit too suspicious to be true, especially when taking her vendettas against Satsuki in mind, so I would like to hear Keisuke’s side of things instead of blindly believing her words.

Another thing we saw in this aftermath was the reveal of the reason why Naoyuki was into hiding most of his life, which is also why he hates HPA and is thankful to the despairs for destroying it. Before this reveal I thought he was related to someone who worked on the Kamakura project, left it and wanted to expose HPA for their sick experiments, but got silenced by the steering committee in the process and in order to keep this secret under wraps they decided to wipe out the dude's whole family just to be safe. So learning that Naoyuki is related to IZUKU KAMAKURA HIMSELF was absolutely insane to me, I had to read a few posts again just to be sure I was getting this right. I guess that explains why none of the family was around to show up to Izuku’s funeral, by the time he actually died most of them must have been wiped out or well into hiding, and seeing as this but remained even in modern day it seems like the people behind it REALLY wanted the Kamakura descendants eradicated from the face of the earth. My bet is on the steering committee being behind the Kamakura hunt, but who knows, I was super wrong about Naoyuki's origins, I might as well be way off here too.

We also got to see the Void’s shit day coming to an end but once again I feel like an odd one out here as I really don't care much for the voids, Mikado and Kokoro are the most interesting out of them to me so the other's shenanigans really don't interest me all that much regardless if they're having a good time or getting screwed over. Since that segment was mostly just them whining and yelling at one another I don't have much to say, I am however curious to see if Kokoro will be the one to steal the NWP like Mikado wants her to, because I would like to see her use her connections as a renowned figure to aid in their plans instead of lurking in the lab all day.

Then we spend a decent amount of time in Jabberwock island and, wow, lots of things going around there huh? I wasn't even expecting we would get this many important scenes right here and then seeing as the episode was wrapping up from the Remnants getting called out by Masa and Hajime to Mikan’s final talk with Hiyoko, Miaya’s world shattering realization that her cousin is beyond saving and Hiyoko's karma coming back to bite her, it was a LOT to cover and I'm happy to say that the pacing was actually very nice for these scenes! None of them went by way too quick or overstayed their welcome. I won't mention all of them in detail here as to not make this single ask even longer, though I may send some add ins talking about them later on, so allow me to just mention the highlight of this section to me which was the work Nagi's character and her realization that what she wants is change and not to return things to what they were before. Her talk with Tengan late at night was just something so out of this world to me and it gave me a feeling I don't even know how to describe reading through it, it feels like a scene that was planned for a long while getting beautifully executed just as intended. Another thing I really liked was the contrast between Yukio and Nagi, how both of their reasons for helping the class were selfish in a way though for him it was out of love for his classmates while hers is hate towards the teacher, a disdain that is the main reason why she's helping the remnants in the first place which genuinely caught me by surprise, she had been repeating that she was doing this for Yukio for so long that I really did believe she was just that nice of a person and was helping them out of good faith, but I really like that her reasoning is far from nobel, It further separates her from Yukio and her canon counterpart Chiaki. Which in turn makes me wonder if she may feel some form of resentment towards her? Since by all means Chiaki got what Nagi should have gotten but never had; A class that treated her like an equal and loved her, and now she has to watch what should have been her friends treat the fake version of her with more love than they ever treated Nagi herself.

Overall, I can't say I liked this episode as much as I did the last but I wouldn't call it awful or even bad by any means, really, the biggest problem here was just the wacky pacing so allow me to hand over a little tip on that! Good pacing doesn't mean all scenes need to be slow and take a while, every story will have segment which are longer or shorter than others, but what you can't do is speed through them without giving the reader time to breathe and digest the information being given to them, and in the case of this format specifically, interact with the story. Give us some time to think and send in asks, if all you got are people wanting to continue, then go forward, but don't speed through the scenes like you're in a 100% speedrun because at the end of the day that just hurts the enjoyment for the readers.

-Critic anon

//And yep, time for the review is being sent and a rather interesting read to get through here.

//As say, the episode was mostly a wild ride and lot to write because I did want to get everything out and written, showing the progress of the story and even planning stuff out and while yes, I do understand that there is some severe pacing issues and a lot to uncover with this, so I'll say what needs to be say.

//With the Afterlife theater; well... I feel this one does make sense given what was shown so far; I mean we got Yasuhiro's comment about ghost, Komaru seeing ghost/even talking to Monaca's father and DR3 with the after life theater which I did want to expand upon and write them but as say, there is gonna be a reason it does exist - just that it hasn't happen yet.

//As for the multi-mission thing, I think it was something that I did want to write and I think it is gonna be the only time I will write something like this again, especially as it was a lot to cover and I will admit the pacing got weird.

//Now onto the issues with the missions going on; especially for Peko's, I think the thing is that it was never going to be about the Kisaragi Foundation or Tsurugi here as again Tsurugi would be more focus on arresting the members of the Kuzuruyu Clan and stopping the human trafficking, as the point of this mission was to be about Kyosuke and him realizing that his ideology towards 'all Ultimate Despairs must be killed' and how Peko's situation was going to be look into because if you think about Peko and her situation - she can't exactly change if Fuyuhiko is around at all times, so the point was to show that if they want Peko to become better, she needs to not be with Fuyuhiko.

//As say, I probably won't do something like this again; mostly as I think it was a lot of pacing issues and I think the next time I do this will be for both episode 13's since that be when we got more then 2 missions going on for each episode.

//But yeah, the conclusion on Jabberwock Island and everything that was something I wanted to write for a very long time; showing both Yukio and Nagi's own flaws coming forward and even Nagi's own views on Chiaki along with how the Class treated her is going to be explore a lot in both episode 12's, especially when comparing Chiaki and Nagi as people but also Nagi's own realization is something I did want to write for a long while.

//The problem with Nagi here is that she wants things to return to normal but she really has no idea what 'normal' is, plus it's clear that Nagi doesn't like Hope's Peak very much as while everyone else's memories of that place is a more positive one, Nagi's however is the complete opposite and she rather see that place not existing but at the same time she wasn't going to join Junko's cause since she does think there are other ways to deal with it then kill people - so yes, Nagi would be deem an 'Ultimate Despair' by Future Foundation but she isn't and I think why she never exactly express that opinion is due to how Future Foundation operates.

//The main themes of Future Side is to realize the flaws and issues with Future Foundation, the ideology that Kyosuke had set for them which is starting to have actual consequences/flaws and changing for the foundation needing to happen.

//While the themes of Despair Side is to see the past, how things were before the tragedy and even how the seeds were always there and Junko simply use a very flawed and broken system to cause the tragedy.

[elshells]

4 and 5 for the pride themed asks!

Questions from this post! Pride month's almost over now but who cares? Not me!

Gonna answer for my five main characters of Agent Ace bc why not?

4. Is your oc's environment supportive about their identity? How does this impact them?

Generally, yes. I like to imagine that the city of Harmont and the version of Earth it exists on is better than ours in that regard. Individuality is celebrated, in regards to and beyond queerness, and everyone is free to love and identify pretty much whoever and however they want. But that's not to say that it's a flawless society (far from it). When crafting backstories and 'behind the scenes' content, I do imagine that certain characters have had experiences with homophobia, or at least toxicity within the queer community, but it's never the main focus of the story. I guess they're technically headcanons since I haven't written them as words onto paper, but even so, the portrayal of queer characters is prominent and overall positive.

5. How did you figure out your oc's identity?

For the most part it's vibes, but it also depends on the character!

Sophia (she/her) - I knew I wanted Sophia to be on the ace spectrum for two reasons: 1) asexual characters are criminally underrepresented in media and fiction, and 2) it made sense for the direction I was taking with her character. When I started to flesh her out, I started to get the sense that she had little to no interest in sex; she's practical in how she dresses and presents herself, and hates stepping out of her element. However, romantic feelings didn't feel totally out of character for her. She has a partner (Ahren, who is also asexual), and while she's not touchy-feeling and canonically dislikes hugs, she cares for him deeply and would only consider doing anything physical with him (though the most they like to do together is kissing and cuddling). So, I ultimately came to the conclusion that she's not just Agent Ace, but she falls under the category of demisexual!

Janus (he/him) - In the past, I've described him as bisexual, but now I think I would actually call him bicurious. He's only ever pursued relationships with women, but is nevertheless open to the idea of being involved with a man. I've debated back and forth with the idea of writing in a love interest for him in the future, and I think I've since realized it could go either way. It opens a lot of doors for me to choose later on down the road, since he's more uncertain than other characters in terms of the endgame, despite having a more established background.

Harley (she/her) - Harley is bisexual mainly because I myself am bisexual. In my writing I tend to follow the philosophy of 'when in doubt, they're bi,' but for Harley I knew from the beginning that's what I wanted for her. Unlike Janus, however, her first and only real relationship is with another woman, although she's had fleeting interest in men in the past.

Jade (she/her) - When I first started writing about Jade, I knew immediately that she was a lesbian. As a character who slightly-unintentionally takes after multiple IRL friends of mine (most of whom are gay) and as Harley's eventual girlfriend, I had STRONG vibes that she had only ever had eyes for women and had never faltered in that regard. A true icon and an absolute queen in my eyes.

Max (he/him) - Max was the trickiest to figure out. For a while, I couldn't decide how to identify him, and that was how I realized that, as a character, he would probably prefer no labels at all. I guess he would technically qualify as pan in that regard, but I think if you were to ask him about it, he would probably just say 'not straight' and leave it at that. He's also another character that I've thought about giving a love interest; there will likely be some serious tension (most likely gay, the way I'm leaning at the moment), but I haven't decided for or against a relationship.

[cavegirlpoems]

OK so I think you're responding to a slightly different point to the one I'm making, which is specifically about queerness, defined as non-normative gender/romance/sexuality/family.

What I am not saying is that queerness is defined by oppression, merely by being non-normative. (It's possible to experience queerness and not be oppressed over it. I would point, for example, to the example of people who historically have chosen to remain unmarried; they often don't face direct oppression, but their decision to remain single is outside of the expected norms.)

A key point here is that queerness is, therefore, socially constructed. Normative behaviour in one society might be distinctly not normative behaviour in another. Thus, what's queer in one culture might not be in another. For example, monogomy is - in our society - a pretty rigorous expection and those who don'tpractice it are strongly othered and often marginalised; here, non-monogomy is queer. However, there have been many, many societies in history where this was not the case, and without the social expectation of monogamy, non-monogamy is no longer queer.

So. In a culture without a norm around a particular behaviour, one cannot be queer in relation to that norm.

This, then, is a framework for discussing if a given text is meaningfully queer; does it care about the experiences of being non-normative?

OK, but what do we mean by 'care about', hmm? And my response is that a text cares about an element that can meaningfully affect things by its presence or absence. So an element can be included and not meaningful to the narrative; this is the case in, for example, tokenistic representation in mainstream media.

In storytelling terms, I think a good rule of thumb is "if you swapped out the genders, would anything change". If you can take a gay couple in a given story and replace them with a straight couple, and nothing about the story changes, then your story might include gayness but its not about gayness. It's not a queer text, it just happens to include gay people in it.

This is not, necessarily, a bad thing! Plenty of quite good media has incidental lgbt characters whose lgbt-ness isn't central to their character or the plot. Take Ray Gillette in Archer, say: he's openly gay, and it comes up, but his gay identity isn't really important to the plot, its cool flair. Archer isn't a queer story, it's a story with a gay dude in it, and that's okay.

So far so theoretical. Let's put this in to practice with an example from an actual game.

I play in a larp called Empire. Empire's setting is completely gender-blind. There are no social distinctions between men, women, and others. This has been picked up in play by a (strongly progressive) player base, who like not dealing with sexism, homophobia, transphobia, etc. For all intents and purposes, you can be as gay as you like in this setting, and nobody will raise an eyebrow. (People who do tend to get banned for a) being homophobic and b) playing wildly off-brief).

So. I have a character, Sister Keziah, in a fairly conservative human nation in this game. She's had various casual romantic entanglements with both men and women in the past, and these entanglements have not been meaningfully distinct based on gender. One or the other doesn't get commented on; Kez being bi isn't a factor worth discussing, and the straightness or gayness of a given fling isn't relevant.

Nothing queer so far. Kez's relationships have all been perfectly normative. From the inside, as somebody who's been in both straight and gay relationships, her straight and gay flings have not felt meaningfully different in the way that my relationships IRL have.

Now. Recently Kez has started dating an orc from another nation. This is unusual. Relationships outside one's nation are a little unusual, and relationships across species much more so. And the difference has been distinctly noticeable. Kez and her orcish paramour are not being directly oppressed or hate-crimed, but. As a topic of conversation, it comes up. People feel an urge to offer their Oppinion on the relationship. It gets side-eye from people. I get asked "so how does that... work" by people. These are familiar experiences.

Here's the distinction. In the human/orc relationship, we're telling a story that tackles queer themes in a way that the same relationship between two human women (in a setting where that's totally normalised) doesn't.

Moving On.

This post is an elaboration on thoughts I've made elsewhere, pushing back against the idea that D&D specifically (and games following its pattern more generally) are somehow Queer Media. They are not.

In order for D&D etc to be Queer Media, it must care about the things that constitute queerness; normative and non-normative behaviours and identities relating to gender, relationships, sexuality and family. It does not care about these things.

Your decision to play a gay PC in D&D is - like Ray Gilette's gayness, or a D&D character's hair colour - flair that doesn't meaningfully affect the course of events, because D&D fundamentally does not care about a character's romantic behaviours. It has no mechanical effect on the character, and the stories D&D is intended to tell - action/adventure stories with lots of big fights - are not about the romantic behaviours of the protagonist.

Now, it's possible to bend and stretch and hack D&D so that the story - and maybe even mechanics - do care about these things, where a character's gayness is a driving force behind events. However, if this happens, that's come from the players, and the text of D&D has been no help. D&D isn't a queer game, you are a queer player. The distinction matters. I will go on to say that I'm not discussing representation here, I'm discussing themes. These are different things. Representation is the depiction of individuals of a specific demographic, ideally accurately. Themes are the expression of ideas and experiences. You can have one or the other or both or neither. An example: There are no Jewish characters in Journey To The West, and there are no Jewish themes in this story either. This is because the story takes place entirely in ancient China. Another example: Ray Gillette is incredibly gay, and while this provides fun flavour to his social interactions with the rest of the cast, it basically never alters the plot of Archer. Archer has gay representation but is not thematically queer. I would say that while there are gay (and also bi) characters in Archer, it's not a gay show. Another example: C.S. Lewis's The Horse And His Boy contains (extremely heavy handed) Christian themes, while not containing any actual Christian characters or mentioning Christianity at any point. It's quite hard not to view TH&HB as a christian story, what with all the allegories going in. A final example: Priscilla Queen Of The Desert is a story where the protagonists are gay, trans, drag queens and gay trans drag queens. It's also fundamentally about drag and how these characters relate to it, and to each other and wider society through it. It has both lots of LGBT representation, and queer themes. Priscilla is, I think we can all agree, peak queer cinema.

As a final note, while I touched on, say, race and culture in my post, I did so to point out that this framework doesn't really work for it. I am talking specifically about queerness here since a) that's what I'm qualified to talk about from experience and b) nobody is going around saying that D&D is a triumph of Black culture because the rules don't explicitely forbid you from playing a Black character, and in fact we all recognise that saying so would be ridiculous.

My point is that saying that D&D is a gay game is equally ridiculous as calling it a Black game.

Further thoughts.

There is a tendency to write settings - particularly for interactive media like ttrpgs, larps, etc - that are essentially gender-blind, where you can create whoever you want without that having an effect on the game. The decision to be gay, or a woman, or trans, or a gay trans woman with pink hair is an aesthetic choice that will not give you a meaningfully different experience in the game.

This rather kneecap's the setting's ability to tell queer stories, imho. If we take it as read that queerness refers to gender- and sexuality-based identities and behaviours that fall outside of the societal norms, then the experience of falling outside those societal norms is (rather tautologically) a key element of queerness.

So, in a completely gender-blind setting, one can't - tautologically - be gender-nonconforming. There is no expectation to conform to. The experience of queerness, of being outside of societal norms, becomes null and void. Such a setting will feature homosexuality, but it won't feature gay pride, and nor will it need to as none of the societal forces that led to the pride movement exist.

This is a double-edged sword. On the one hand, a world where one is not oppressed for one's identity is an enjoyable world to explore for what should be obvious reasons. On the other hand, it becomes impossible to tell (say) a coming-out story in a world where there's no closet to be in to begin with.

There is also the element that whilst a setting may say its gender-blind, it's still written and played in by people from the real world, who still subconsciously inherit real-world biases, and this can be reflected in the world.

While (say) women might have just as much right to political power as men, if in practice the people with political power are disproportionately men, that sexism is still present. Far from removing it, the gender-blindness of the setting simply obfuscates it, and often actively proves an obstacle to addressing it; one cannot call somebody out in character for sexism in a setting where sexism doesn't exist, no matter how sexist they're being.

(Similar biases around sexuality, transness, polyamory, kink, aceness, etc also creep in).

(In many cases, this can also apply to other axes of marginalisation, such as race, etc. However, in a lot of settings this doesn't apply the same way. Many fantasy settings are deeply opinionated about a character's ancestry; see the D&D skull-callipers explaining that elves are just more intelligent and agile than everybody else, and this being a mechanically enforced fact in the world.)

My point, anyway, is that in these cases efforts towards inclusivity can paradoxically erase that which they seek to include. One cannot represent the lived experience of a marginalised identity in a setting that totally denies the existence of that marginalisation.

[ghostdrinkssoup]

hi! i’m kinda new to hannibal despite it being on my watchlist for six years sdfjsjhd. i still have three eps left till the end of the series and even though i already know what happens, i wanted to ask you - what did you feel when you watched the finale for the first time? were you surprised??

ps. i think your blog is really neat :)

hello and thank you !! dw I’m still pretty new to hannibal too, I first watched it in january I believe? but I’d been meaning to for AGES I’m such a fan of gothic horror + my film lecturer at uni liked a short I made in class (had to film a stalking scene using horror elements) and he was like “you should watch more horror stuff, it might help” and boom, here I am :D

anyway to answer your question: I really love twotl and how s3 was written in general !! the build up felt super solid and natural to me because will and hannibal’s arcs were super consistent throughout, especially will’s tbh. I talked to a friend of mine irl about it and she wasn’t a fan of his corruption, but personally I was so glad they went there with his character. his morality was the focal point of the whole show, and has been since the beginning, and as much as the external plot goal of catching the minnesota shrike, and then eventually the copycat killer/the chesapeake ripper, is what drives the story, the internal plot question (and interwoven character arc) is really an exploration of the nature of will’s empathy and ability to connect with psychopaths, and how that affects his identity and sense of self. so even though he eventually catches hannibal, s3b works because the question the story raised in s1 still hasn’t been answered. at first I was worried imprisoning hannibal was going to be a bad move story-wise because it resolves the plot goal before wrapping up the character arc, but was pleasantly surprised with how well it all worked. I think it has to do with the choice to have hannibal turn himself in rather than have will capture him directly, because that way they’re still in some sort of power struggle (“hannibal has agency in the world” and all that)

I think it’s why twotl hits so hard, because after all this time, and after all the ways these two have tried to hurt each other and free themselves of the other’s influence, whether it be because of hatred, or worse, because of love, they’re unable to end the conflict. and the audience knows that because we see them try over and over, and it just doesn’t work. in the end, a mutual surrendering to whatever they’re becoming seems to be the only solution. and it’s not even advantageous for either of them, like will tells bedelia that breaking hannibal out of prison isn’t some attempt to manipulate the situation to his advantage, it’s just “degrees of disadvantage” which makes sense because if he sets hannibal free he loses his family, his life, any shred of morality he has left, etc (“he who holds the devil, hold him well. he will not be caught a second time” / “I don’t intend for hannibal to be caught a second time”). and it’s great because it’s not a win for hannibal, either. “my compassion for you is inconvenient” evidences this well enough. it would be easier for him to kill will, and he could do it if he wanted to, but he just can’t. and it’s all just so satisfying because it makes sense. neither of these characters were set-up for moral redemption, so it feels right for their story to be tragic, and yet everything about it is so twisted and complicated and human, you know? they’re both so different by the end, and finally equal within their power play

and I was very fond of the ambiguity of the ending !! you could interpret the fall as purely metaphorical (fall from grace and into corruption) or it could be literal, or both. if you think they died at the end and bedelia cut off her own leg, only for them not to show up, that’s a valid (and wonderfully ironic) interpretation. if you think they survived and are now hunting together (with bedelia being their first victim) then that’s also equally valid. I think for a show that had to end due to cancellation, the creators made the right choice to leave the finale up to the audience to decide. it’s why I’m still unsure if I want a s4 because the story feels so complete? but I’m definitely not against it either if it ever gets picked up again :)

omg I ranted and wrote a whole essay response for you NDBSJHD this was fun though !! and I hope you enjoy watching the final episodes yourself :DD feel free to share your thoughts after if you want, I’m always interested to hear different interpretations !!

[nicuveo]

Yeah, same, on almost all counts: "nicuveo" is kinda my name, at this point. My parents don't call me that yet, but, you know, otherwise, that's the name under which you can find me on not-literally-but-almost every site.

But i wonder if there is a generational element to this idea of having a consistent "identity" across sites, this idea that your username is, well, a name. I would hazard a guess that for the younger generations (you know, all the adults on this site that don't remember or were even born after 9/11), since there's no longer a strong distinction between your IRL and online personas (you don't have to "go online", and it is no longer a wholly separate world that doesn't intersect with your daily life), there might no longer be a need to settle on one "online name"?

It might be more subtle than this, it might also have to do with how the landscape has changed, how we now have only, like, half a dozen sites left, and a third of them are owned by Meta and tied to your legal identity in some way...

Or perhaps it has to do with the fact that trans visibility has increased so much over the last three decades that despite the recent backlash it has become easier for people to explore those feelings in communities that are not entirely divorced for their "offline" identity?

I think I grew too much on the internet to understand how some people have blog names.

Like, I'm from IRC and trans communities, if your username is bball24, that's your name. I assume your mom addresses you by that name and it reads the same on your driver's license and maybe even birth certificate l.

I never think "oh, best-tardis-in-the-galaxy is a blog run by some gal named Sarah!". No, if I think of the name at all, it's like obscure trivia. My good friend Ms. Best-tardis-in-the-galaxy has the government name 'sarah'. Perhaps she hasn't been able to change it yet, too much paperwork or something?

I just sometimes see people post things like "what's your blog name mean?" and I'm like "it's me. What else would it be? You mean kirk's-big-saggy-tits isn't your name?"

Basically it's something like Facebook's real name policy but from the other angle. I think everyone is named what their username is, not vice versa.

(and yes, my name is foone. My mom calls me that and it's what's on my license. Isn't that true for everyone?)

[otakween]

Digimon Adventure V-Tamer 01 - Volume 1

I'm doing things slightly out of order here, but I'd like to get to all the side stuff that came out prior to Tamers before I move on from Adventure. This is the first Digimon manga that came out (aside from C'mon Digimon which is contained within this release) so it'll be interesting to see those humble beginnings.

Ch.1

-So I guess this is some alternate universe version of season 1? (Or maybe like a beta version?) The plot feels a little similar to Digimon World where digimon are a battling v-pet IRL and the main character gets sucked into the digital world solo.

-In this version of the story, Taichi has a V-dramon. Unclear so far what level digivolution a V-dramon is or if it's related to Veemon. Zeromaru is a dumb name...

-Goggles AND a cape? That's a bit much Taichi...

-I like how doofy Gabumon looks in this. The digimon are way more cartoony and expressive so far.

-Full color and actual, red blood!? This manga looks fabulous on my tablet <3

Ch. 2

-More Digimon World vibes. The Holy Angel Castle looks a lot like the ice castle that you can only enter if you have a vaccine digimon in the PSX game...

-There's a "should digimon have human partners?" element here that we haven't really seen in the show yet. I feel like this question is inevitable for most mon series.

Ch. 3

-Okay, I'll admit, I didn't see the pun in "Zeromaru" (maru is another way to say zero) until this chapter. I hate the name slightly less now.

-A Tonosama Gekomon and a HolyAngemon are a pretty bizarre combo lol

-I really love the art style in this actually. Chibi-mode Taichi was adorable in this chapter and the colors are really nice as well. I wish we got more full-color manga releases like this one!

-So Demon is gonna be the big bad in this? That's kinda nice actually cuz he got majorly short shrifted in 02. Seems like his design is completely different here. Kinda looks like Ogremon...

Ch. 4

-I kinda like how the wild digimon get names in this. Since every digimon from the same species seems to be pretty much identical, giving them names allows me to become more attached to them.

-Only just realized that I don't really know why Etemon is called Etemon. I tried googling it and the Digimon wiki's explanation didn't really help...

-Pretty wild that Gabo said "God is gone" lol. Also, Digi-world creation myth confirmed.

-The manga's McGuffin was introduced: V-tags. I'm guessing the "V" is for "Virtual," but if you're going to call everything "digi" that seems to go against the branding a bit...

Ch. 5

-Okay Gabo's incessant "You guys need to act more concerned!!" gag is getting really annoying. He says it like every 3 pages!

-I had no memory of Deltamon so I thought he was new, but I guess he appeared in an 02 episode? He's really ugly. Also, how many samey dino digimon designs do we need!?

Ch. 6

-These chapters are super short and since a lot of them are battles, they take like 2 minutes to read. Perfect for young kids I guess!

-That triceratops with pecs was pretty cursed.

Ch. 7

-When the digimon are hurt their skin cracks like they're made of plastic or something. Kind of a weird choice...

-Another thing that differs between the manga and anime is that we see Taichi perform first-aid care after fights. The anime doesn't really show a lot of wounds in the first place and usually the digimon just rest to heal.

Ch. 8

-I was surprised to see MarineDevimon who doesn't appear in the anime until 02. I wish I knew more about which chapters of this came out when because it apparently came out over the course of 5 years (1998-2003) -- Edit: this info is thankfully on the wiki

-In this chapter Gomamon says that Triceramon being a data-type means he's a "good" digimon. In the anime they said that even virus-types can be good. So maybe that's more of a prejudice than a fact? (Or it's just different in the manga).

-Gomamon is so baby in this!

Ch. 9

-This manga reminds me of Yu-Gi-Oh! season 0 where everything is just slightly off.

-The digimon are more blatantly programs and apparently if you go inside them it's just a neon void? Also, I guess the 01 in the manga's title is a reference to binary.

-Let's see how much random stuff the digivice can do in the manga. So far it allows you to scan digimon for their HP and to communicate telepathically.

Ch. 10

-Already 2 out of 5 tags collected which means that this tag collecting thing is probably just one out of many arcs.

-For some reason the official release goes up to chapter 10 for volume 1 but the fan scans go beyond that? I'm going to stick to the official release because 10 is a nice clean end point.

This manga seems pretty typical for a game/anime-tie in for young boys. The chapters are very easily digestible and nothing too deep happens. The magazine it was serialized in, V-Jump was also home to things like Yu-Gi-Oh!, Dragon Ball and Dragon Quest, so the demographic is pretty clear. I'm really enjoying the artwork mostly. I wish there were more character moments but the reoccurring cast is pretty dinky at the moment. Let's see where this goes!

[hopefullystillatheatrestudent]

okay so i’ve been going crazy these past few days. all about cockles/jensmish and obsessively watching their panels or reading the transcripts BECAUSE. THEY ARE LOUD. LIKE. i saw some fancams on twt and i thought people were just exaggerating but noooooooooo!!!???? so, getting to the point. you said that how do we know that jensen is performing masculinity? because jared isn’t and THAT IS A BIG BRAIN MOMENT. ON POINT. I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH. a particular moment from gag reel that jumps out (which you’ve talked about) when jensen goes ‘cas, you are my baby daddy’ and misha goes, ‘i know i love you too’ and jensen goes, ‘i didn’t say i love you’ and misha goes, ‘i know you wanted to’ and jensen says, ‘i love you’ WHAT THE FUCK! that was NOT a joke. yes, people took it as a joke and had a good laugh BUT I HAVE WATCHED IT TOO MANY TIMES AND IT LIVES IN MY MIND RENT FREE BECAUSE IT WAS NOT A PERFORMANCE. THAT WAS JENSEN. THAT WAS MISHA. jensen has a had trouble with the pda and being all touch feely (the breakup theory) and he gradually grew into it, accepted it and misha was right there all along, never pushed it. it was like a deancas au but tbh, 99% of destiel is because of cockles and we all know it. i just. jensen has latched onto dean as an emotional support because he tunes with it. understands it. projects on to it. yeah, i just had to say it and get it off my chest. (and what about those poetry pages on instagram? alma? what is your opinion?) btw, you have a lovely blog and your analysis are right on target.

so there is a LOT i’m going to address here(how dare you bring up [gunshot] i HAVE to talk about it now) so again!!!! under a cut it goes but i hope you appreciate my rambles anon it seems like you do :,)

1. jared vs. jensen and performing masculinity. hell yeah man. jared and jensen are both just ‘guys from texas’ but they are still so vastly different. today i actually had a revelation that i’m pretty sure has to do with me being bi. and it’s that i have a group of straight friends(that i love dearly but they care too much about hockey and pitbull imo could not be me) and i have a group of queer friends(who are also batshit[affectionate]). and it’s like whichever group i hang out with a different side of me emerges? they’re both me, it’s just that certain aspects of who i am as a person only surface depending on who i am around. however, i will say i feel like i watch what i say around my straight friends more. i see that very clearly in jensen as well. around jared during panels and on set, he’s definitely putting on an air of machismo and engages in typical guy talk. i do think an element of it is performative, because he wants validation from jared that they’re still just two dudes from texas taking on the world together despite his sexual identity. does that make any sense??? i hope so. but when he’s with misha he is an entirely different person and his sense of humour becomes wildly different. the machismo fades away, he’s way less caught up in what people think about him, lets his guard down, etc. to go back to my original point which is how j2 are different in that regard....jared does not do this. he is a constant. he does not flip a switch between ‘performing masculinity’ and ‘not’ because he isn’t performing any part of who he is. he just IS. so yeah these two are similar in many regards but there’s somewhat of a dissonance between them when it comes to how they perform masculinity because one of them is putting on a show and the other is merely being.

2. that crypt scene blooper(here just in case you need to see it again. do it. as a treat.) when i tell you i have easily seen this over thirty times??? since it first came out??? i mean it. it is such an overlooked(r*mantic) moment and it means so much more than people think it does. i’ve talked about the context behind it, and i think that’s why this blooper was so meaningful, so i’ll mention it again. jensen and misha had a LOT of trouble with this scene. the reason is that jensen couldn’t wrap his head around why dean would be saying these things, if i remember correctly, and both of them sat down and scoured over how they should play it for a while before filming(teamwork ;) teammates *ahem*). [to be honest we all know why jensen had a hard time with that scene and it is because it is blatantly romantic. rip to him but i would simply give in to it at that point but oh well] so anyway, their heads were scattered going into shooting, which is NEVER a good headspace to be in for a scene, ESPECIALLY not a pivotal one. but they had each other to help them through said weird energy on set that couldn’t possibly have invoked the best feelings, especially considering jensen STILL doesn’t think he played that correctly(but he praised misha on his performance :,) ). and with that context every single part of that video hits haRD 

-’stop pulling my face towards your crotch’ i think this is objectively hilarious because it really really looks like jensen is pulling HIMSELF towards misha’s crotch. again, you’re fooling no one, jensen. misha’s wheezing laugh and the way he wraps himself around jensen is also,,,sweet??? like i don’t know how else to describe how i see it but this moment really reads as jensen, in his weird ‘constructing elaborate rituals’ way is asking for security through a physical touch from misha and he happily obliges and gives jensen what he needs. because i mean...watch it again. jensen ‘fights back’, but not really at all, actually. pretty wimpy counterattack. he literally lets himself be smothered by misha, and i would literally describe what they end up doing as cuddling. 

-’i need you, cas. you’re my baby daddy’ i love having an actor’s perspective on things bc i think i can explain what’s going on here. jensen just delivered what was(in his own mind) a rotten take of the lines he’s most scared of delivering. so the scene was already messed up. therefore; ensuing fuckery is warranted to help him feel better. but there’s also for sure more than meets the eye for what he says here because of misha’s reaction after??? like he seemed genuinely touched. first of all, he’s saying ‘you’re my baby daddy’ as half-jensen, but not necessarily dean either(because he didn’t say the previous lines as true to his character...you get it), to misha, not cas. i think i’ve made this point before, but every single innuendo in the gag reels is to misha specifically, never once cas. therefore; logical conclusion: ‘you’re my baby daddy’ was for misha and it meant something deeper than we think because of what follows it

-this part. jensen’s giddy ass smile after he sees misha crack and then misha says ‘yeah, i know’ (can i just say his voice when he says this is so intimate???? like am i intruding guys??? sorry i’ll let myself out) also he is smiling SO BIG

- ‘i know’ ‘why are you laughing?’ ‘no i know i love you too’ this analysis is already so long but i still want to get into what THAT whole exchange means. ‘why are you laughing?’ to me sounds like jensen’s pretending to be affronted by misha laughing at something that is serious. and it’s serious because he quite literally meant ‘i love you’. he did. misha knows it. misha’s really REALLY good at cutting the bs and just getting to what people are actually trying to say. he has an innate sharpness to his sense of humour. so yes, misha is being 100% accurate when he says ‘i know, but you wanted to say it.’ misha isn’t lying here. jensen did want and mean to say ‘i love you’. and then he actually does say it(in a jokey way but not really). 

- so yeah. it is actually so romantic??? like in a weird way jensen was professing his love for misha here?????? and that’s why this clip will NEVER. ever. get old. 

3. jensen having trouble with pda and projecting onto dean: we can all call ourselves dean coded cas girls but NO one deserves that title more than jensen ackles himself. he is dean winchester but marginally less repressed because he actually did admit he was in love with his best friend and let himself be happy, and pretty early on too. one year and two months as opposed to twelve years. so. happy deancas au is correct. and yes about the pda thing: one day i want to write my own post about both of their body language when it comes to each other, but all i can tell is jensen, even in the early days, couldn’t help himself from flirting with misha, but if misha ever crossed a line, jensen would not be happy. clearly he’s come around, however. what i find sweet is that misha always follows jensen’s lead when it comes to how much affection they’re allowed to show each other onstage. it touches my soul

4. destiel is cockles fault. yeah. and the thing is everyone knows it, too. even non-cockles shippers will explain early destiel as entirely dependant on jensen and misha’s wild chemistry. and that chemistry is easily explained by the fact that misha and jensen are literally just wildly horny bisexuals who were crazily attracted to one another and were falling in love on screen before our very eyes. and when you have THAT insider info(which sounds cray doesn’t it!!!! the destiel actors are in love irl??? huh???) everything really does click into place. why destiel got SO popular when the show and actors never ever intended for it to happen.(i know some people think misha was playing cas as gay the whole time for shits and giggles, and i won’t deny that[especially considering he found out early on that destiel was why he was staying on the show], but i don’t think he really wanted it to amount to anything, nor did he care??? i mean he has the real thing with jensen, for one, so their characters aren’t really as important. for two, he loves joking about destiel because it’s a cultural phenomenon and it’s fascinating, and i’m sure he did ship it because he’s unhinged, but i don’t think it was vastly important to him either way.) destiel got popular because everyone was and is unintentionally reading into the real deal. i could pull up countless gifs that people have used as destiel proof that is actually just jensen and misha being messy. mainly jensen. if i’m being honest.  the symbiotic relationship between destiel and cockles is why i’ve stayed onboard the destielcule and shellerscape for three solid months now; because it is utterly fascinating to witness and kind of super beautiful, too. 

5. alma(and others). so. i do NOT want to really REALLY get into this in its entirety here and now so i will just give you my opinion on if i think alma is misha or not. also; i don’t want to mention the other poetry accounts here bc i feel like that’s a bigger breach in privacy, but a lot of people do know about alma now. way too many, actually. this is why we can’t have nice things. anyway-to answer your question-there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that yes, misha is running that alma poetry account. i am 100% certain. some people think it’s actually three people and they’re all connected to misha in some way but that is so needlessly complicated. as it goes in psychology; the easiest explanation is probably the right one. it’s just one person running that account, and it is misha collins. i don’t know why it’s so hard to believe KNOWN POET misha collins(who is known to spend most of his free time writing poetry anyway) would have created a secret poetry account to write about his intense secret relationship under an alias and also get legitimate feedback since no one used to know it was him. oh and the handwriting is identical??? you are blind if you do not see that i am sorry. and a million other things prove it’s misha too but yeah all you need to know is yes. it’s him. it would take a literal livestream from a random woman on that account to convince me otherwise. and honestly not even that because a random woman could technically still log in if misha asked her too. so. it would take a hell of a lot to convince me otherwise, clearly. that said DO NOTTTTTTTTTTTT GO ONTO THAT ACCOUNT WITH A SUPERNATURAL RELATED USERNAME AND COMMENT THINGS THAT ARE COCKLES RELATED. ARE YOU BRAIN DEAD WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT’S OKAY. sorry i got heated but god please just don’t be dumb so many people have already gone way too far 

6. thank you for your lovely compliment on my analyses!!! i love doing them but i don’t know if people actually like reading them so i really appreciate it