#and in the end they simply didn't end up being one and the other and now he only has these things that he can barely move

[ms-demeanor]

In my college American poetry class we had to do memorized readings of three poems, one of the ones I chose was Langston Hughes' "Weary Blues" because I'd already built a dramatic performance of it in high school.

This was an interesting college class because it was tiny (16 students at the start of the quarter, 12 at the end) and because it was *poetry* a lot of people in the class fudged the readings and did them the day of class, which meant that they weren't really prepared to discuss them. After two excruciating classes in a row where I was the only person ready to discuss the readings (in the second class I literally had to sit on my hands to keep myself from trying to speak after the professor said "Alli cannot answer for the rest of the hour, somebody else say something" and then nobody did for another ten minutes of the most awkward silence I have ever encountered), the professor brought in lyric sheets for "Summertime" from Porgy and Bess.

He started the class with our normal written quiz, then asked who was ready to talk. I was, because of course I was, but nobody else raised their hands.

"If you're not going to talk, then you're going to sing," he said, and handed out lyrics to everyone. "We are all adults, and we have an adult agreement that you will read the assignments and be prepared to discuss them, and I will lead discussions and teach you about the readings. You are not holding up your end of the agreement like adults, so I'm treating you like children, and your participation for the last three classes will not be based on your quizzes - which is good news for a lot of you - but on doing a sing-along today. So I'm going to sing this first, then we're going to sing it five times together, and then we're going to talk about the song together, and you are going to do your readings before my next class or I am going to be handing out more lyrics and we'll sing another song together like kindergartens."

That class is why the four students who dropped did so, but everyone who stayed was prepared for discussions for the rest of the quarter.

Anyway, that was before our second poetry presentation so by that point I'd already sung with these people and had no shame, so i decided I was going to actually sing the singer's part in "Weary Blues."

I recorded it on my phone and asked my friend Lindsey, who was in the class and happened to be a choir director, to listen to it and tell me if it sounded terrible. She said that it did not and asked if I had any vocal training and I said no and she said "you should join a choir" and i felt very flattered and continued practicing and memorizing the poem.

We had to give critiques of each person's performance, and most people were generally polite like you normally would be when giving feedback, but apparently one young woman was still pissed at me for being a suck-up and doing the assigned readings.

"First of all i couldn't even pay attention to the rest of the poem because you sound like a man. I think singing was a weird choice and singing like a man made it impossible for me to take your reading seriously" and i was a bit surprised (so were other people) but simply said "thank you, that's good to know, i was trying to sound like a man because the speaker in the poem describes the singer as a man, it's good to know i hit that mark" and we moved on.

Lindsey and the professor both checked in on me at the end of class, Lindsey to say "practice made that sound really really really good you should join a choir" and the professor to say "i was leery when you asked to sing part of your poem, i don't usually allow that but I'm glad i did" and both to ask if I was upset by the other student's comments.

I was not upset. Mentally i was jumping up and down and doing backflips and was bummed because the other student was probably just being mean and didn't actually think my voice sounded masculine.

But now I'm finding videos with titles like "is that my mom or a dude? Learning about the contralto range" and I'm like haha wait yeah, gender euphoria is stored in the vocal cords.

[lustspren]

IMPURITIES EP. 1 | N.Y. State of Mind

Male reader x Yunjin, Chaewon

First chapter of this LSF mini-series.

word count: 8.3k 

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When HYBE made you sign that contract over two years ago, you had no idea that you were going to be managing five wild, unruly girls. If you had known, maybe your signature wouldn't have been on that piece of paper, but at that point in your life, you needed the job; it was either that or starve. Besides, as a frequent K-Pop fan, it really was your dream job, so there weren't many issues with it; it was perfect.

But you never imagined that at your age, you would feel so close to going gray because of the behavior of those girls.

Maybe you were exaggerating and being a little grumpy. After all, they were girls around your age, so you could easily put yourself in their shoes and understand what was going through their heads. However, with all that, there were things that you would never be able to understand in your life simply because you weren't a woman. It might sound sexist, but it was the only explanation you could find.

At first they were little angels, as always happened in such cases; you were a stranger to them, and of course they weren't going to behave like unruly teenagers from day one. But as the days went by—yes, days, not even months—, the ones who seemed to be well-behaved and obedient girls turned out to be a pain in the ass 70% of the time.

To be honest, you couldn't say you didn't love them all. They were unbearable most of the time, but they were also endearing, and you could say you considered them good friends. What other choice did you have? You couldn't be at odds with the girls you would spend seven years of your life with, so there had to be a joint effort on both sides to not make discord the status quo. The results were positive, and even though they continued to do their misdeeds, you had learned to tolerate them for your mental health.

Two years later you were practically a family, having gone through both ups and downs. The emotional journey had been intense and rough, both for you and them. The things you had to deal with were rubbish: tight schedules, physical and mental overload, and most often, tons of hate on social media from out-of-work mentally retarded people. But like the family you had become, you faced each adversity with a firm grip.

And now you were facing the most stressful thing an artist could go through: a damn tour. But not just a tour, also a performance at one of the biggest music festivals in the world, something that even you were terrified of, and if you were terrified, you couldn't even imagine how they felt at what would be one of the most important moments of their careers.

You were all excited, though. The arrival in Los Angeles was smooth and uneventful, both at the airport and later at the hotel. However, things started to go wrong the very next day, at the sound and stage checks for the festival. As a manager, it was your job to absorb the vast majority of those problems so that the girls didn't have to worry, but due to factors beyond your control, it ended up affecting them directly and therefore, it also affected their final performance.

It wasn't a great performance; everyone was disappointed, but you remained strong and encouraging for them to keep them from falling apart, especially in the days to come when social media was at its hate peak and the criticism just kept coming. It was part of your job, but more than a manager, those couple of days you were just a friend to them, and the bonds became even stronger. It was hard to have to get to the point of having to disable all comments on every platform, but it was the best measure you could suggest as a professional who looked after her artists.

Coachella aside, preparations for the rest of the tour were going great. There weren't too many dates due to scheduling issues for the next few months, when the girls would have to start preparing for their next comeback, so you would only visit a few big cities until next year, which is when you would go to Europe as well.

The first stop of the tour was none other than New York, the city where Yunjin had grown up. You had arrived from Los Angeles in the morning, and at noon you were already checking in at the Park Hyatt for your stay for the next three days. The day of arrival was free, then the next was the rehearsal at the venue and the last day was the concert.

"Okay, listen to me everyone," you said, standing in the middle of them with the room cards in hand. You were in the lobby, near one of the many bars in the hotel. "You have a room for each of you, but if you want to share that's your problem," you handed each of them their cards. "If you're going to leave the hotel please notify me or I’ll kill myself and then blame you in your dreams."

"I'm not planning on doing anything today," Sakura said, taking her card. "I'm exhausted and I just want to finish knitting the hat I was making."

"Can you teach me?" Eunchae asked, standing next to Kura and holding onto her arm.

"What, knitting?" Sakura looked at her. Eunchae just nodded with a pair of bright, excited eyes. "Alright, I'll see what I can do."

"I'm playing Overwatch with a friend later," Kazuha said. "So I won't be going out either."

"What friend?" you asked, out of curiosity.

"That's not your problem, why do you want to know?"

You sighed.

"I'm literally just asking."

Chaewon and Yunjin were muttering things to each other, between giggles and knowing glances. You looked at them with a raised eyebrow.

"And what about you two, anything to say?"

They both looked at you with their arms linked, their eyes innocent and their lips pursed to keep from laughing.

"Nope, nothing," Yunjin shook her head.

"You're lying," you looked at Chaewon. "You're going out tonight, aren't you?"

"We already told you no!" she protested. "Why would you distrust us?"

"I can list the reasons and finish tomorrow."

"Oh come on, you're exaggerating," Yunjin patted your chest a couple of times. "We're not going out, really."

"Yeah, we're just going to eat snacks and watch a couple movies," Chaewon nodded.

You narrowed your eyes and looked at both of them for a few seconds. Suspicious, too suspicious. You weren't sure if they were really going out, but they were up to something, that much was obvious.

"Fine, I'll choose to believe you," you said. "Now go, I have a meeting with the venue staff and I can't be late."

The girls went to their rooms, and you asked one of your assistants to take your luggage to yours. The meeting was an hour long, but you had to be there at least twenty minutes early, so you hurried out of the hotel to the venue, to arrange everything related to the logistics of tomorrow and the day of the concert.

The meeting in question started at 1 in the afternoon and ended at 4. Then you and part of your team went to lunch, and at around 7 you were back at the hotel. Your day was not over yet, but the rest of your work could be done calmly from the comfort of your room.

Upon going up and entering your room you went straight to take a shower, then put your laptop on the desk next to the hallway and got to work, with headphones on and a can of Monster that you had bought during lunch.

Your inbox was full, and you were a bit of a workaholic, so you immediately locked in and got going. In these situations you always lost track of time, which was pretty unhealthy but you couldn't help it no matter how hard you tried. But you had to admit that this time you had gone too far, because it was 3 in the fucking morning.

There were still some things to attend to, but it was time to draw the line and set a limit, because otherwise you would end up seeing the sunrise when the next day you should be in full physical and mental prime. So you closed your laptop, rubbed your eyes and took off your headphones before standing up.

Whenever you went to sleep after sitting for a long time you had the habit of taking a walk to stretch your legs, and since there was no space in your room to do it comfortably, you opted for the hotel hallways. So you grabbed your phone, a small jar of M&M's, and left the room.

As expected, the hallways at that hour were deserted. To other people it would have seemed spooky, but to you it was relaxing for the simple fact that no noise pollution of any kind reached your ears, just the sound of the ventilation and the videos you occasionally watched on Twitter at low volume.

But soon you were no longer alone. Just as you reached the elevator to turn around and go back to your room, the elevator dinged and the doors swung wide open.

What you didn't expect was that the ones coming out of there would be two hot girls in cocktail mini dresses and high heels, and that...

Wait a fucking minute.

"Oh this has to be a fucking joke," you sighed, bringing your hands up to your face to lift your head and run both through your hair.

"M-Manager-nim, uhm, we can explain!" Chaewon hurried to say, exiting the elevator with Yunjin.

“Don’t talk to me,” you said, holding up a finger. You didn’t want to know anything, so you turned around and started walking back to your room.

“No, wait!” Yunjin said, chasing after you. “Where are you going? U-Uh… What are you going to do?”

“I said don’t talk to me,” you replied, looking ahead. The two of them walked behind you, right behind your shoulders. “I’ll report you to HYBE so you can get into trouble.”

"No! Please don't!" Chaewon pleaded, shaking your arm slightly. "No no no! We're sorry!"

"It was my idea!" Yunjin snapped. "It's just that if we told you what we were going to do, you wouldn't let us!"

"I wonder why," you said. "I can smell the alcohol coming off of you two."

"We're not even drunk!" Chaewon said. "I swear! Please forgive us!"

"I don't care, you crossed the line," you shook your head. "It would have been easier if you had just been honest with me from the start."

"So you refused to let us out?" Yunjin asked, defiant. "It was easier to just sneak out and be done with it! And besides, what the hell are you doing up at this hour?"

"Managing your reckless ass and looking out for your future. But I see you don't care about that."

At that moment you arrived in front of your door, but before you could put your hand on the knob, Chaewon stepped in between to stop you. Your bodies were very close, and only then did you pay attention to how she was dressed. It was a short, tight black dress, with a considerable neckline and long sleeves that went from her shoulders to cover her hands. She looked so hot in it that it distracted you for a moment, but not enough to forget your mission.

“Kim Chaewon, step aside,” you demanded.

“Aniyo,” she shook her head.

“Oh come on, manager-nim,” you heard Yunjin say quietly behind you, close to your ear. She put her hands on your shoulders and squeezed them gently. “Why don’t you relax a little?”

“Don’t tell me to relax when you guys lied to me so blatantly,” you replied, still looking at Chaewon. “Get out of the way.”

Chaewon glanced at Yunjin over your shoulder and showed a hint of a smile, before stepping away from your door and closing the small distance between you.

“We already told you we were sorry, manager-nim,” Chaewon said, placing a hand on your chest. You felt her breath against yours. “There’s no need to be so grumpy.”

She very subtly pressed her body tight against yours, looking into your eyes with slightly parted lips. You knew perfectly well her intentions because you were no fool, and you wanted to respectfully push her away and enter your room, but a stronger part of you kept your feet rooted there.

“Chaewon-ah…” you sighed, trying to change her mind.

Yunjin pressed herself against you as well, making you feel her chest against your back. She wrapped one arm around your abdomen and slipped the other hand into the left pocket of your sweatpants.

"Why don't you come with us to the pool so you can reconsider this whole thing?" the redhead asked in your ear.

"Yeah, I think all those emails have saturated your mind," Chaewon said, wrapping her arms around your neck. One hand stayed on your shoulder and the other went up to ruffle your hair. "Let us help you clear your head a little."

Before you could say anything, Yunjin lowered her hand from your abdomen and brought it to your bulge, just rubbing it up and down with her palm. Then any desire you had to go to your room and write that email vanished. Still, you didn't want to get too proactive just yet, you wanted to keep some of your dignity and see how far they would take it.

"So? What do you say?" Yunjin insisted, slowly making you hard. "You coming with us?"

Again the words got caught in your mouth when Chaewon suddenly pulled you into a kiss. Everything happened too fast for you to resist, and before you knew it you were wrapped up in a sensual kiss with her, your hands on that small sexy waist. Yunjin was now massaging your already hard cock, her head on the side of yours as she watched you and Chaewon kiss. That was what finally got you into the whole deal.

“You know this is wrong, right?” you asked against Chaewon’s lips, and you turned around to face Yunjin, who thanks to her heels was just as tall as you. Her dress was even shorter than Chaewon’s: burgundy velvet, strapless and an A-line skirt, perfect for showing off that perfect pair of legs. “Not only because I’m your manager, but because you have a sound check later.”

Yunjin put a hand on your shoulder and pressed herself against you. You instinctively wrapped one arm around her waist to hold her. It should have put you off by the fact that you'd never touched her like that in two years, but fuck, you were two people almost the same age, and she was a hot girl; you weren't going to miss that golden opportunity no matter how upset you were with the two of them.

"I've been on more important errands on less sleep, honey," she said, running the tip of her tongue along the side of her upper lip. Her hand still playing with your cock over your sweatpants. "So I don't care."

"Yeah, I know you don't care," you said before kissing her.

Yunjin had probably the most attractive lips you had ever seen, and it didn't surprise you that she knew how to use them so well in a kiss. Your heads went from side to side, as you tasted each other's lips and filled the hallway with wet sounds. Her hand squeezed your bulge and rubbed the outline of your cock, and you just lowered your hand from her waist to her left ass cheek and left it there.

"Hey, hurry up," Chaewon said from behind you. She had you by the waist, giving you little kisses on the back of your neck. "I want to cool off in the pool."

Yunjin pulled away from your lips and looked at Chaewon over your shoulder.

"You and I both know that's not what you want," she said with a giggle, and looked at you. "You're in then?"

"You guys dragged me in," you corrected her. "And I already have my hand on your ass. Now I have no choice."

"Then let's go!" Chaewon said, and she moved out from between you and the door to walk towards the elevator.

Yunjin gave you a couple more small kisses and took your hand to lead you to follow Chaewon. Once inside the elevator, she cornered you against the back wall and kissed you again with her hands on your neck. You returned the kiss, taking her by the waist. A few seconds later Chaewon stood to your left, and you moved away from Yunjin's lips to grab the blonde by the face and crash your lips against hers.

The floor where the pool wasn’t too high, so the kiss didn't last long. Once the elevator doors opened, the three of you walked out to a small hall before the pool area on the left. Behind the counter was only a girl who worked at the hotel. She looked up from her phone and watched you walk towards her.

"Oh, sorry, the pool is closed guys," the girl said.

"Yeah honey, we know," Yunjin said ahead, going to lean against the counter with her purse on the top. From there she pulled out five $100 bills and slid them towards the girl. "Why don't you go take a break for an hour and let us keep watch? Oh, and leave us three towels please."

The girl stared at the bills for a few long seconds until she reluctantly took them.

"You better not make a mess and not make any noise," she warned, pulling the towels out from behind the counter for you. "Because you'll get me in trouble."

"You don't have to worry, sweetheart," Yunjin said as the girl got up from her chair and walked around the counter. "We'll be ghosts."

"Just hurry up," the girl reiterated, going to take the elevator.

As the girl waited for the elevator, Yunjin led you and Chaewon by the hand towards the beautiful pool area. The first thing that stood out to you was the huge wall of windows right in front of your eyes, and the series of cube-shaped pendant lights that hung from the high ceiling and ran from one end of the pool to the other. But the overall atmosphere was modern and intimate, with the white lights of both the pool and the lower ceiling area where you were at a dim level, making a gorgeous combination with the gray matte porcelain floor and the marble walls and pillars.

Yunjin went to leave the towels on the chairs to the right, in a small raised area with white light below that had a few lounge chairs; she left the towels piled on one of them and went with Chaewon to the pool, which was L-shaped with the bottom cut out. They approached the stairs, took off their heels and dipped their feet in the water to stand on the first step.

"Oh god, the water is freezing," Chaewon said with a giggle, while Yunjin pulled her hair up into a high bun.

"It's perfect for washing down the alcohol, whatever," Yunjin said, then turned to look at you. "Ready for a little show?"

"At this point I won't be surprised by anything you two do," you replied from the raised area, arms crossed.

False. You wish you hadn't said that so you wouldn't look like a fool, as Chaewon and Yunjin both pulled their dresses up over their breasts, quite efficiently tucking the skirts at the neckline so that it held up like a top. This revealed both pairs of delicious bodies to you, as the only thing they were wearing were their respective panties. Chaewon's were white, thong-like ones. And Yunjin's were high-waisted black cheeky ones.

"What happened, manager-nim?" Chaewon asked with a giggle, seeing how you were stunned by their half naked bodies. "I thought nothing would surprise you."

"Yeah, well..." you couldn't find anything to say, and you definitely couldn't stop staring at them.

Yunjin and Chaewon laughed and went together into the pool, which was the perfect height for the three of you. While Chaewon's was shoulder-high, Yunjin's was just below her breasts. You went with them as they swam to the long end of the pool, rolling your sweatpants up to your knees, taking off your slippers, and sitting on the edge with your feet in the water.

"Huh? What are you doing there?" Yunjin asked, swimming to your feet. Chaewon swam backwards behind her, careful not to get her hair too wet. "Aren't you coming with us?" She grabbed your ankles, and you felt it as a warning.

"Uhm, I'm actually freezing," you replied, trying to get out of the situation. "I could catch a cold and die."

"Why worry about the cold when we can keep you warm down here?" Yunjin insisted, stroking your calves up and down. “Or did you forget why you came with us in the first place?”

Yunjin moved one of her hands up your calf to your crotch to meet your newly formed erection because of them. She squeezed it between her fingers and massaged it. 

You sighed.

“Are you really going to make me enter those Antarctic waters?” you asked, tilting your head.

“Oh yeah,” she nodded, biting her lip. “Unless you don’t want to get wet with us.”

“Some emotional blackmail you put on, woman,” you shook your head, and reluctantly stood up to take off your hoodie and sweatpants. Now in your boxers, you sat back down on the edge of the pool and slid in.

You gritted your teeth, tensed your body, and closed your eyes to keep from complaining, because the water was so cold that you felt it soak into your bones and freeze them. Yunjin immediately hugged you, both her arms and legs wrapped around your torso. You hugged her back, delighted to be able to feel that delicious body and that soft skin under your fingers.

"I know, I know..." Yunjin murmured, seeing that you were having a hard time with the water temperature. She made sure to be pressed against you, with as much skin as possible against yours. "Let me warm you up, manager-nim," she gave you a soft kiss. "Although I know a way to warm you up even more."

Chaewon swam to your back and hugged you and Yunjin at the same time, her chin resting on your left shoulder.

"And what way would that be?" You asked, already feeling more relieved to be in the middle of that sandwich. Your hands moved down from her waist to her buttocks, giving them a light squeeze and rubbing them up and down.

"Don't play dumb, manager-nim," Chaewon said in your ear, and slipped a hand between your body and Yunjin's to bring it inside your boxers. She grabbed your cock and held it between her fingers. "You know the answer, so you're going to say it."

"Yeah, but we know you well, and we know you won't say it that easily," Yunjin said. "So we're going to make you say it."

You chuckled.

"Are you going to drown me in the pool every time I refuse or what?"

Chaewon's response was to yank your boxers down, releasing your throbbing cock under the water. She wrapped her fingers around it, and slowly began to masturbate you. You gasped, and Yunjin smirked, unwrapping her legs from around your torso to press herself against the side of your body, leaving room for Chaewon to comfortably move her hand.

“Tell me something, manager-nim,” Chaewon murmured, giving you pecks on the side of your neck and then catching your earlobe between her lips. “In these two years, have you ever masturbated thinking about us?”

The question left you as cold as the pool water did when you got in, and your well-known answer made you blush. They were four of the stupidest hottest girls you had ever seen in your life, and they were all recently at their peak of hotness; it had to happen sooner or later for you.

“I...” you took a deep breath, trying not to look Yunjin in the eyes out of embarrassment.

“You have, huh?” Yunjin said, her gaze fixed on you. She held onto your shoulders with one arm while rubbing your abdomen with the other. "You don't have to be ashamed... it's not like we blame you. I've been given outfits that leave little to the imagination."

"How did you imagine us, manager nim?" Chaewon asked in a sexy murmur, still moving her hand on your cock. "Doggy style? From behind against the wall? Us riding you?"

"Or maybe sucking your cock?" Yunjin said, to spread kisses on your cheek near your lips. "Did you imagine my pretty lips around it?"

"I'm sure you also imagined yourself pounding my tight pussy," Chaewon said, moving her hand faster. Yunjin replaced it a couple seconds later.

"Or me jumping on your cock," the redhead said, jerking you off at a fast, steady pace. "Come on, don't be shy, manager-nim. Tell us."

"Please, manager-nim," Chaewon moaned into your ear, massaging your balls before replacing Yunjin's hand with her own. "We want to know."

You would have loved to be able to say something, but Chaewon was moving her hand so well on your cock that you were lost in the limbo of the physical and spiritual realm. You were brought out of your trance by her abruptly stopping her hand from moving.

"Ugh, no!" you whined, clenching your fists. Yunjin and Chaewon giggled.

"Then answer," Yunjin said, circling your tip with her index finger. "Have you masturbated to us or not?"

"Fuck, yes," you huffed. "More times than I'd like to admit."

Yunjin was the one in charge of grabbing your cock again and resuming the handjob, now faster.

"See? It wasn't that hard," Yunjin said with a giggle.

"You're such a pervert, manager-nim," Chaewon said, kissing your neck, while her hands roamed your chest. "Why don't we go outside and let us finish the work? Then maybe we can fulfill some of your little fantasies."

"What if the worker comes?" you said between gasps, since Yunjin was still jerking you off. "I don't want to get kicked out of the hotel with two days left here in New York."

"It's only been 10 minutes," Yunjin said, and let go of your cock. "We've got a good while left to have some fun."

"Then hurry up and get out," you said, trying to get out of the way of the two of them.

Chaewon and Yunjin stepped away from you and swam towards the pool stairs. You followed close behind. As you climbed out of the water you took the lead, heading straight to the small raised area near the exit to grab a towel and dry yourself off as much as you could, having to remove your boxers so as not to wet the lounge chair once you lay down on it. The girls certainly didn't mind, in fact they followed your lead and removed their panties, keeping their dresses bunched up around their chests.

They knelt on their lounge chairs facing you, and bent forward to bring their faces close to your cock, giving you a hot view of their arched backs and wonderfully raised cakes. You weren't shy at all, and as they peppered each side of your shaft with kisses and licks, you groped and squeezed their ass cheeks.

"Fuck, you have a very juicy cock, manager-nim," Chaewon panted, one hand on your thigh and the other around the base of your cock.

"I always knew he was packed," Yunjin said, stroking your cock from the middle up. You looked at her with a frown. "I should have seduced him earlier; now I see I had it pretty easy."

"Are you calling me a slut?" you asked between gasps, making them laugh.

"Considering how quickly you gave in," she shrugged and pondered the answer for a moment. "Yes."

Before you could answer Chaewon took you into her mouth, slowly pumping her head for a few inches and making you gasp. Yunjin joined in by using her tongue on your base and balls. You leaned forward a little, so you could extend your arms further and get your fingers between their ass cheeks and finger their pussies.

Chaewon moaned around your cock, quickly taking as much of your length into her small mouth as she could to pump faster and faster. A few seconds later she pulled out, giving way to Yunjin's perfect lips, which wrapped around your tip and went halfway down before coming back, in a pace that soon became fast and messy.

You rubbed your fingers between their soft and already wet folds as you watched Chaewon give you a sloppy blowjob, in aid of Yunjin's tongue and lips on the rest of your shaft. You didn't want to cum too fast to prolong that experience as much as possible, so you looked up and left your gaze on the cube-shaped lamps while you gasped.

But as hard as you were trying, Chaewon and Yunjin forced you to watch as they both slurped the saliva they themselves left on your cock, over and over again in a toe curling double blowjob that had you moaning like the slut Yunjin said you were. A few long seconds passed, until you couldn't control it, and you came as they were making out with your tip in the middle.

"Oh god!" You moaned, watching as Yunjin and Chaewon were still kissing each other even as your cum poured out in thick rivers and stained their tongues and mouths. They lapped up every drop, glad to swallow as much of your load as they could before using their mouths to get your cock clean and shiny again.

You didn't wait for either of them to say anything before you got up from your chair and went to kneel on the floor behind Chaewon, grabbing her firm ass cheeks and planting your face between them.

"Oh fuck!" she moaned in a small start, feeling your tongue move up and down her folds. "You were hungry for it weren't you?"

"You have no idea how much," you replied, squeezing her ass cheeks and eating her pussy like deep down you always wanted to do.

Within a few seconds Chaewon let her moans flow, soon drowned out by a kiss against Yunjin's lips. You devoured that tight pussy with devotion, with the sole goal of making her feel as good as she had made you feel just a couple of minutes ago. She let you know you were doing a good job by twisting her hips and pushing them back, urging you to keep going until you made her cum.

Her climax came not long after, thanks to the quick licks you gave to her clit and the intense way you groped her ass. She fell back with her hands braced against the chair Yunjin was on, writhing between cute moans and spasms.

“My god!” Chaewon groaned as you licked and kissed between her folds. “Why did you never say I was this good at eating pussy?!”

“I remind you that I’m your manager, Kim Chaewon,” you said, and stood up to spank her. An intrusive thought you let win. “I don’t think it would have been appropriate to tell you two days after your debut.”

“Ugh why now we women are the ones who have to make the first move!” she whined, now lying on her side to look at you with that adorable, usual expression she made when she got angry.

"I wasn't going to risk my career on whether you wanted cock or not. Don't be a bitch," you said, and walked around the front of the chairs to climb onto Yunjin's, who immediately hugged you by the neck and kissed you, pressing your torsos together and making your cock rub against her lower abdomen.

After a few seconds of making out with Yunjin you grabbed her by the thighs and made her sit down, with her back against the slanted back of the chair. You sat on the lower edge with your knees resting on the floor, leaning forward and bringing your mouth directly to Yunjin's pussy.

"Oh fuck yeah," Yunjin moaned, one hand on your head as you ate her out. "I should sneak around more often if this is the result."

"Don't push your fucking luck," you muttered, making her laugh. "If you want me to eat your pussy you just have to ask me nicely."

Yunjin moaned as you reached her clit and sucked gently on it.

"Mmmgh, really?" she asked, arching her back a little.

You smiled.

"Yeah, just fax me and get in line."

"Son of a bitch!" Yunjin squealed in annoyance and pulled at your hair, but her anger didn't last long as it didn't stop you from trying to give her the best pussy eating of her life.

Yunjin relaxed in the chair, leaning back and with her legs wide open to let you work. As the seconds passed she became more restless: she arched her back, tugged at your hair and breathed more heavily, until she ended up enclosing your head between her thighs. The grip was strong, with her calves crossed on your back, and you felt your head about to explode, but that was just like coal to your boiler.

"Fuck! Mmmgh!" Yunjin moaned, fingers clenching in your hair as you attacked her pussy mercilessly. “Right there manager-nim, yes, yes!”

Seconds later Yunjin exploded in your mouth, lifting her pelvis and holding onto your head with both hands. She bucked in her chair, moaning maybe a little too loudly, so you reached up and covered her mouth with your hand as her orgasm passed. When it did, she released your head and you pulled away from her pussy.

“Let’s go to my room right now,” you said, standing up to go get your clothes.

“What, why?” Chaewon asked. “We still have like half an hour.”

“If I fuck you guys the way I want to I’ll lose track of time,” you replied, picking up your sweatpants to put them on without your boxers as they were still wet. “And I don’t want the worker to come and find us in the middle of intercourse.”

"Yeah, that's fair," Chaewon said, and stood up to grab a towel and wrap it around her waist.

Once you were dressed you went to help Yunjin stand up and do the same as Chaewon did. You then grabbed all the wet underwear, wrung it out in a corner and carried it in your hand as the three of you left the pool area heading for the elevator. Upon reaching your floor you rushed to your room, and once inside, the two of them removed both their towels and what was left of their dresses from their bodies to jump into bed.

You stripped down at lightning speed and climbed into bed with them. Chaewon greeted you with her legs spread as you climbed on top of her to kiss her, wrapping her arms and legs around you. Yunjin settled on the left side next to Chaewon, and reached between your bodies to reach for your cock and stroke it; she had it hard in a moment, and without either of you asking, she took it inside Chaewon's pussy.

Chaewon squealed, and bit your lip unintentionally in shock. She dug her nails into your scalp, slightly tense as your cock forced its way between the tight walls of her pussy. You continued to kiss her, stifling moans of satisfaction until you finished with your entire length inside her.

"Mmmgh, manager-nim?" Chaewon moaned against your lips.

"Yes?" you gasped.

"Next time be a little bolder and ask me," she panted, stroking the hair on the back of your neck. "I can't believe I'm finding this out two years later."

"Or I could just sneak into your room and fuck you like the whore you are every chance I get," you replied in a sarcastic tone, beginning to move slowly.

"Oh, would you do that?" Chaewon asked with a giggle.

"Jeez, you're hopeless," you shook your head, moving from her lips to her neck to kiss it.

"You can always pretend you have an emergency and woosh! Catch him," Yunjin said from your left, kissing the other side of Chaewon's neck.

"Great Jennifer, give her ideas," you said between gasps, enjoying the way that tight pussy suffocated your cock every time it went inside. "As if I don't have enough with all the shit you two do on a daily basis already."

"You're overreacting, manager-nim," Chaewon moaned, tightening her grip on your torso, hands now on your neck. "We're not that unruly. But you made a big mistake, because now we're really gonna be bad bitches for this cock."

Mother of god, where the fuck have you gotten yourself into?

You forced Chaewon to release your torso and straightened your back to put her legs open, one over Yunjin, and with your hands on her thighs you began to go harder and harder. Chaewon sought out Yunjin's lips, and the two of them shared a steamy, sexy kiss as you fucked her pussy and made her moan against the redhead's lips.

Yunjin played with Chaewon's perky tits, pinching her nipples and massaging her mounds in the process, then moving her hand down her abdomen and to her pussy to rub her clit in quick circles. Chaewon pulled away from Yunjin's lips and arched her back, holding Yunjin's head with one arm and clutching a pillow over her head with the other.

"Does that feel good, Chaewonie?" Yunjin asked, bringing her mouth closer to one of Chaewon's tits to suck on it, circling her clit faster. You thrust harder, pounding that pussy between moans and with your fingers digging into her thighs.

"It's the best cock I've ever had in my fucking life!" Chaewon moaned, her mouth parted and her eyes fixed on you. "Please don't stop!"

Yunjin focused on licking Chaewon's nipple and moving her fingers faster, while you leaned forward a little just so you could thrust faster. Chaewon started moaning so loud that the very pillow she was clinging to became her muzzle, which she bit down on before covering her face with. An instant later she uncovered her face and exploded with a squeal, squeezing your cock as her orgasm made her shudder.

"Mmmm that's so fucking hot," Yunjin groaned, and got on her hands and knees beside Chaewon to reach over to her crotch, pulling your cock out of her pussy and bringing it into her mouth to suck on it for a few seconds. "You want me to ride you?" she asked.

"Who wouldn't want to be ridden by you?" you asked, and she smiled slowly stroking your cock.

"Wow, you're getting more and more points every time," she giggled. "This was quite a triple."

Yunjin made room for you to lay down in her spot with your head on the pillow. Already settled she straddled you, her pussy pressed against the back of your cock. She made eye contact with you as she untied her hair, and as she let it go she placed her hands on your chest and slowly ground her hips back and forth to rub your intimacies together.

"Are you gonna keep teasing me, Jennifer?" you asked with your hands on her thighs, looking into her eyes.

"Why? Are you desperate to be inside me, manager-nim?" she asked back and bent over you, running her hands up to cup your face. You brought your hands to her waist and then to her ass to squeeze it. "I think you want it even more than I do."

"You better shut the fuck up," you said, and reached for your cock to press it between Yunjin's folds. She giggled, and cooperated by slowly lowering her hips until she was fully impaled on your shaft.

"Oh god this feels better than I expected," Yunjin moaned with her ass resting on your pelvis and her hands on your shoulders. "I hope you know you just created a monster."

"I remind you again that I'm your manager, woman," you panted as she began to move up and down. "You're playing with fire and you might burn me by accident."

"Don't be like that, baby," she panted, giving you small kisses as she moved gradually harder. You had her red hair all over your face, but that and you groping her ass only made it hotter. "No one has to find out, right? It'll be our little secret."

“As you wish,” you replied, squeezing her ass cheeks before dropping your hands to the sides of her lower back. “But if it starts to affect your career or mine I will turn you off immediately.”

“Deal,” Yunjin said with a smirk, and crashed her lips against yours before going wild.

Yunjin grabbed your face and stuck her tongue inside your mouth, seeking to take control of the kiss. You happily gave in, content to let her do whatever she wanted with you as long as she kept moving on your cock, with those hip movements that were slow, deep, and deadly. After a few seconds she moved to your neck, to fill it with sucks, kisses, and finally biting you. She cried out when you spanked her with both hands, which prompted her to move faster and with less control.

"Hey, don't even think about leaving me out," you heard Chaewon say on the left, and she somewhat roughly pushed Yunjin off your chest to climb on top of you and sit on your face with her calves on your arms.

With your view now blocked by Chaewon's ass you had no choice but to adapt to the situation and put your mouth and hands to work. She pushed her hips back, smothering you between her perfect ass cheeks, which you held onto to spread  them and allow yourself to breathe while you ate her pussy.

"Can't you stop seeking attention for five minutes?" Yunjin asked Chaewon, planting her feet on the mattress to squat on your cock, fast and hard. "Oh god I was riding him so good!"

"And now you're bouncing on his cock," Chaewon replied between moans, her hands on your chest. You could hear her sharing sloppy kisses with Yunjin. "What's the fucking difference?"

“That I like looking into guys' eyes while I ride them!” Yunjin protested, moaning louder and louder as she bounced faster on your cock.

Chaewon didn’t say anything else as the two of them began to kiss and muffle their moans against each other’s lips until Yunjin came, grinding her hips with your cock buried deep in her pussy and shaking on top of you. Her orgasm having passed, Yunjin climbed off you and collapsed to the side. Chaewon then raised her hips and knelt beside your head.

“Manager-nim,” Chaewon told you as you sat up, staring at you with those puppy subby eyes. “You’re not going to tell HYBE anything about us sneaking out tonight, are you?”

You looked at her with a poker face.

"What kind of dishonest man do you take me for? Of course not," you replied, brushing a lock of sweaty blonde hair from her cheek. "Next time just tell me and I'll go with you."

Chaewon's eyes lit up like two cute lanterns.

"Really?"

"Aha," you nodded. "Only if you're a good girl and get on your hands and knees for me."

Chaewon complied with the order and turned around to bend forward and rest her hands on the mattress, knees apart and ass raised high for you. You positioned yourself behind her, and with one hand on her waist you went back inside the tightest pussy you'd ever been in. She looked at you over her shoulder and hugged the same pillow from a moment ago tightly, biting it the moment you started to thrust.

The view you had was perfect, and enviable to the you of a few months ago, who could only access it through a very lucky wet dream. But now it was for real: you had a hot view of Kim Chaewon, with that appetizing ass that looked small but whose shape was perfect, and that milky attractive back that had you salivating since the Smart stages.

"Go hard, honey," Chaewon moaned, still looking at you. "Please forget your position and fuck me like I'm all yours."

"Oh, if you insist that much," you nodded slowly, and let out a spank so hard that the shape of your hand was instantly marked in red. Chaewon squealed into the pillow. You then started going really hard on her, making the sound of her ass slapping against your pelvis reverberate through your room.

"Fuck! Just like that!" Chaewon squealed, and buried her face into the pillow. You gave her another spank to make her scream. "Fuck!! More!" another spank. "MORE!!"

One more spank, and this time you grabbed a handful of her blonde hair and pulled it back, in turn separating Chaewon's face from the pillow. Now her moans were fully audible as you pounded her pussy like she was a human fleshlight.

Yunjin had already recovered, and without asking Chaewon's permission, she did her best to get under her and stack their pussies together. Before the baby tiger could protest, Yunjin began kissing every corner of her face and neck to make her melt quite efficiently, as Chaewon was still entirely focused on you and your cock.

"God you are such a pillow slut," Yunjin teased Chaewon, grabbing her ass cheeks and spanking her in the same spots as you. "A little more and you'll be calling him daddy."

"Stop giving her ideas, Jennifer!" you growled through clenched teeth at how good Chaewon's pussy felt in that position.

"I'm gonna cum daddy! Mmmgh fuck!!" Chaewon squealed, burying her face in Yunjin's neck.

"Late," Yunjin laughed looking at you. You just shook your head. "It's your fault for falling into our trap."

"Listen here you little piece of..." you said, being interrupted by Chaewon's orgasm and cute whimpers. You placed a hand on her lower back, fucking her slowly until her body stopped shaking. Then you pulled out of her pussy to switch directly to Yunjin's.

"Hey!" Yunjin squealed when you got balls deep inside her again. "Warn me!"

"For what?" you raised an eyebrow. "I'm sure you got down there because you were desperate for me to be inside you again."

Yunjin blushed and rolled her eyes, which was enough to prove you right. You smiled, and grabbed her thighs to press them against Chaewon's. With her, you took off at full speed from the start, already in search of your own climax, which was only getting closer by leaps and bounds.

Yunjin clung to Chaewon with her arms around her neck, moaning in her ear as you hammered her pussy even harder than Chaewon. Sweat was already pouring down your temples, proof that you were giving it your all when you were already exhausted after so many hours of work. It was definitely worth it, because just like Chaewon's, Yunjin's pussy felt so good that it made you use energy reserves you didn't even know you had.

But what kept you going at your best wasn't that, it was the possibility of seeing those two girls go crazy with pleasure thanks to you, and Yunjin's face being fucked mercilessly was like an expensive piece of art in the Louvre museum, especially when a couple of minutes later she came for the second time on your cock.

"Dear fucking lord please cum honey!" Yunjin screamed as you fucked her like an animal through her orgasm. "Oh my god cum!!"

Seconds later, when you felt yourself about to explode, you quickly pulled yourself out of her and went to kneel right next to both of their heads. They both turned their faces towards you, and stuck their tongues out as you stroked your cock rapidly, until with a loud moan you exploded.

The thick strings of cum came out in strong jets and landed on both of their angelic faces, every corner being painted white and getting sticky. What fell on Chaewon's face spilled onto Yunjin's, who collected most of the drops in a pool on her tongue. By the time your climax passed those two were a mess, so covered in cum that Chaewon kept one eye closed and Yunjin had her lips stuffed.

"Oh my god..." you gasped, mesmerized by the sight. "Stay there."

Even though you felt on the verge of collapse, your protective manager instinct kicked in and you were forced to go to the bathroom to get some toilet paper and help them clean themselves up. But as you did so, you realized something that you hadn't realized in all the fuss, something that left you staring into space.

Sakura's room was right next door.

Shit.

[florestalio]

FATAL OBSESSION — l.hs

even if your best friend seemed to have found the love of her life, the one that keeps her the happiest, while also treating you, and everyone else with respect—you can't help but feel something was... off about him. you didn't dwell on it much—something which proved to be a fatal mistake on your part.

GENRE — pwp, kidnapping au, psychopath au, best friend's boyfriend trope

WARNINGS — DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT, noncon, noncon-ish dumbcon, psychopath!hee, kidnapping, character death, gun play, unprotected sex (don't) + a LOT more

WORDCOUNT — est 10k+

NOTE — READER'S DISCRETION ADVISED!!! went a little too insane while writing this. thank you to my bestie sena who always encourages me to write my deranged wip ideas that I get during the most random times—this one in particular came to my mind while I was... studying. no I'm not lying.

RELEASE DATE — TBD.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

teaser under the cut: (teaser wc — 0.6k) (teaser warnings — none)

there was something severely off about heeseung.

your best friend, chaeyoung, had met heeseung—who is currently her boyfriend—at a bar. from what she had told you, apparently she was simply drinking there alone, celebrating her first ever paycheck—alone, since you were stuck at a family event. when it was time for her to pay, the bartender informed her that someone had already paid for her. surprised, she asked about this mystery person, getting directed towards a guy sitting a few seats away from her.

apparently for her, it was love at first sight.

he looked like everything she ever wanted in a guy—tall, dignified and confident posture, rich attire, a good taste in fashion—not to mention how attractive he looked while sipping his drink, a light smirk on the corner of his mouth, eyes locked with hers. he never broke eye contact—not even once, as she walked over to him—albeit quite bashfully.

from what she told you, they talked all night—about their reasons for being in the bar, their hobbies, their backgrounds, their families, and other things that you couldn't really bother to keep track of.

they exchanged numbers, texting each other every single day. eventually, he asked her out, taking her to the most exquisite restaurant in the city, treating her like royalty. according to her, he was the biggest gentleman—a complete green forest, if you will. he always took care of her interests, noticed every single detail about her, and never failed to bring a smile to her face. truly, she was the happiest version of herself while they were dating.

eventually, she introduced him to you, him being an absolute sweetheart with you as well. he made sure not to make you feel like a third wheel, including you in their conversations. it didn't feel awkward for you at all—almost as if you three were a trio of best friends who hadn't met in a while, catching up.

everything was perfect with him. until it wasn't.

you didn't understand why, but for some weird reason, you started to get a certain... vibe from him—even though his behaviour never really changed. he was still an absolute sweetheart, treating chaeyoung like his own personal goddess… yet there was something so—unsettling about him.

heeseung didn't really do anything, but you still found a chill running down your spine whenever chaeyoung mentioned his name. if you saw him in front of you? you bet either your leg or hand would shake uncontrollably, betraying your anxiety.

anxiety for exactly what reason, you didn't know.

you thought it was ridiculous. why would your best friend's more than perfect boyfriend’s mere presence have you shaking like a goddamn leaf? it made no sense at all.

until it did… sort of.

well… heeseung, despite being such an amazing boyfriend, ends up becoming an ex. how? the story behind that is… messy. extremely so.

you see, they had been dating for almost a year. everyone expects a good and memorable gift from their partner for their anniversary, right? so did chaeyoung. she was really looking forward to it too, given how much of a great boyfriend heeseung was.

and he didn't disappoint. he gave her a present, one that was definitely memorable. it wasn’t memorable just for her, either. it was memorable for you as well. was it good? not so much.

[smuttysabina]

Motherly Impregnations with Yiren

(Male Reader x Yiren/Jihyo(short), 4.3k words) Tags: More mommy time, You don't need massive tits to be a mommy, Slight incest, Stern mothering, Oral and vaginal sex, Erotic dancing, Disappointing sex, Premature ejaculation, Impregnation, Setup chapter for the tropical incest bonanza

Previous Chapter

You had always had Mommy issues, though to be fair, you had recently acquired more than a few "Mommies", who were more than willing to scratch that particular itch. As it turned out, your dear cousin Jihyo had a plethora of fellow idols who were only too happy to help satisfy your lack of motherly attention; in a manner that usually left you emotionally fulfilled, while testicularly drained. Even Jihyo herself had joined in on the fun, though she had coyly forbidden you from penetrative sex, her hands, thighs, and breasts had milked you multiple times over the months; and it had left you even further enthralled by her than you had been before Gahyun had popped your cherry. Now your cousin dragged you along to all sorts of events, and sometimes you didn't end up getting pampered by some amorous idol and drained of your seed simply for being Jihyo's relative. So that was how you found yourself backstage at a recital, while a beautiful vixen salaciously danced in front of you, her every movement an advertisement in lust; you quite honestly had not expected you would be getting fucked tonight, but Yiren seemed intent on making it happen.

Like most evenings these days, Jihyo had arrived after the sun had set, and cheerfully told you what you both would be doing this evening. Ordinarily you would have chafed at such tight control over your social life, but so you had grown so obsessed in your quest to fuck your cousin that you readily agreed to her every whim if it got you one step closer to that goal. Of course, Jihyo knew what you wanted, but was more that willing to use your arousal to mold you into the kind of man she wanted you to be; and it wasn't as if she was ignoring your sexual needs. Why, just last night... You moan pitifully as Jihyo's soft lips slowly move down your shaft, kissing every inch of your length until your tip is drooling precum. Your cousin smiles knowingly while she continues to stroke your cock, evidently you would not be lasting long enough for her to need to use her breasts, let alone her thighs, to bring you to orgasm. She still opens her mouth in pretend shock though when your load erupts all over her face, "Oh! Good boy..." she coos as she licks up the mess she made on your manhood... Next thing you knew you had been bundled into a car with the heavily pregnant Jihyo and driven to a nearby theatre, where an idol from a group you were not very familiar with was putting on a performance of sorts.

Jihyo had never been very close with the idols of Everglow, even if she had been extremely keen on assisting them with matters regarding... breeding. So you had been somewhat perplexed when she announced during the ride to the venue that Yiren had been practicing for a show of sorts, and had wanted to test her abilities in front of a live audience of discerning skill; which obviously meant Jihyo. Still, your cousin was usually far too busy with normal idol tasks for such a trivial request, and not from one of her favorites no less, so something about Yiren's offer must have caught her attention. You had never even met the girl before, and most of what you knew about her had come from watching a video of her and the other members of Everglow getting bred by some guy with a truly monstrous cock. Yiren had been quite dignified, and had indeed mounted it first, arrogant even while her belly was bulging obscenely and she looked on the verge of passing out. As for the rest of the girls, well, watching a girl so short you could rest you arm on her head taking a dick as long as her torso to the hilt had been... an experience to say the least. Even Jihyo had seemed somewhat queasy at the frantic glee those perverts had shown when stretching their bodies far past the breaking point.

So it was a touch awkward when you finally meet Yiren in person, after she effusively greets Jihyo, she turns her attention towards you; and it felt embarrassing to give her a polite hug after having watched her getting violated in such a visceral fashion. But she seemed none the worse for wear as she guides you through the modest venue and into the familiar surroundings of a practice room. Her attendants pull up comfortable chairs for you to sit in while you wait, as Yiren bows in gratitude before hurriedly leaving to get changed for you two; it seems like you and Jihyo would be getting a private performance of sorts before the main event began. The pair of you settle in, chatting idly like normal cousins would, though Jihyo's hand seemed oddly intent on stroking your thigh from time to time. The minutes swing by, until the idol's phone starts buzzing energetically, she idly answers it, her eyebrows narrowing as she glances intently to the side, before sighing and simply saying, "On my way," she pats your leg apologetically, "Sorry dear, Yeji broke into the intern pens again, so I'll have to go handle that, be a good boy and stay for me, okay? I'll be back once I get things settled down back at the office" Jihyo, kisses you on the forehead before marching out of the room, annoyance clearly written on her features as she waddles out; graceful even with a massive belly. Leaving you to enjoy the coming performance alone.

Yiren looks miffed when she waltzes back into the room and finds her feted spectator missing, looking accusingly at you as if you were the one who caused her to leave. Her fury only makes her look all the more attractive though, displeasure looks good on her, and her elegantly applied makeup only heightens the effect. Yiren was dressed like a courtesan of old, her taut stomach on display while her breasts were demurely pushed up, and her limber legs obscured by a tasseled dress. It made you feel as if you were in one of those period dramas, a nobleman indulgently allowing some peasant to dance for him only for her to catch his interest, as well as his seed later that night. In those shows though, the dancer tended to be humble and kindly compared to her competition while Yiren was... "Oh that fucking slut is at it again? Typical, she never could control herself," Yiren sniffs pointedly, as if she had never enjoyed sexual relations with several fans at once. And to be fair to her, you had also been shocked that the bumbling and cheerful Yeji harbored nigh sociopathic levels of nymphomania; her fear of Jihyo's displeasure was likely the only thing that stopped you from being ravaged long before those two Mommies ushered you into manhood.

With a resigned sigh, Yiren puts her hands on her hips and appraises you more closely, though judging by her raised eyebrow she was none too impressed by what she was seeing, "You are... Jihyo's cousin, aren't you?" she muses upon this, before nodding with slight satisfaction, her complex hairdo bobbing slightly atop her head, "Very well, I had wanted her feedback on my dance, but you will have to do. The show officially starts in an hour, so we have more than enough time," Yiren claps her hands to catch her attendant's attention, and they scurry to ignite scented braziers and lower the overhead lights to set the proper ambiance. A low, warbling undertone starts up from speakers bolted to the ceiling, tickling your eardrums in a not entirely unpleasant fashion, as Yiren leans down over you. She smiles as you awkwardly shift in your seat, "Don't worry, I won't bite, just... relax," she affectionately pats your cheek before whirling about and sauntering back to the center of the room. Yiren smoothly twists and bows towards you, her long, red armbands dangling as she demurely supplicates herself; giving you the barest peak of her modest cleavage before she sweeps back into an upright stance. The performance, had begun.

Yiren moves in long, languid movements, unhurriedly showing off her lithe body, wordlessly introducing herself to you as she glides around the floor. A slow, pounding drumbeat accentuates her every step, her hips swaying from side to side in time with it, her skirt rustling tantalizingly, emphasizing her slightest motion. The beat suddenly increases, and Yiren's dress swirls about her as she spins, her leg lifting up to briefly reveal a hint of pinkish skin amidst the roiling folds of her outfit before it is hidden once more as her leg lowers. You lean forward, your interest piqued by that flash of glistening flesh... Yiren, a light smile gracing her elegant features, returns to her sensually lazy movements; but now that you were fully acquainted with her body, she shows what she is going to do with it. The drums pound once more as the idol prances lasciviously about the floor, her limber legs swinging wildly as she draws ever closer to where you are sitting. You are dumbstruck as her skirts ride gradually higher on her hips, pushed upwards by her violent movements, giving you ever more glimpses of that unmistakable slash between her thighs. Your heart slams in your chest in primal sympathy with the beat, and you are utterly enthralled by Yiren, addicted to every seductive flourish of her legs. Your brain is fogged by desire that you do not notice how close she is until her foot sails over your head, granting you an unobstructed view for the first time, as well as the heady scent of a woman in heat. Yiren turns the motion into a spin, smoothly flicking her skirt about herself to reveal her bare bottom before ending in an arched pose; her arms above her head, with one leg raised just enough to, finally, show you what you hungered for.

You are almost drooling as you drink in the sight of Yiren's perfectly formed pussy. Her delicate clit heralding the smoothest set of lips you had ever seen, her modest folds demanding to be pampered and worshipped before you could even consider entering them. Yiren stares down at you, her chest heaving as she lowers her arms, "I take it... you enjoyed... my performance?" she glances pointedly down at the conspicuous bulge in your pants, a weary smile upon her face. Your manhood is all the response she needs, but you are still unable to stop yourself from moaning an affirmative. Yiren cocks her head as she slips into your lap, her arms draping themselves around the back of your chair, "Mommy?" she inquires, "Your mother is far from here, but I would be... happy to take her place," she slides a hand across your shoulders and down your chest, "Now then, Mommy needs something from you, do try and not disappoint, hm?" The strain in your pants grows even greater in response, and she steps back, hands on hips, "Well? Pants off. Now." You shakily shove your pants down your legs, your cock springing energetically as it tastes the humid air of the room. You both look awkwardly at one another for several breaths, before Yiren sighs once more, "I see, I had hoped the father of my first child would have a little more... gumption to him. I suppose I will be on top then."

You attempt to get up out of your seat in protest, but Yiren's hand firmly stops you before you can rise, "Oh, stop. You forfeited your chance to breed me in a dignified fashion the moment you did not fall to your knees and prepare me like a proper man would. So sit back, shut up, and let Mommy do all the work, since apparently you can't." You stammer out a question as she sits upon your lap once more, and Yiren frowns, "What do you mean, 'Already pregnant'? Why would- Oh. There was a video, wasn't there?" You nod shyly, causing the idol to roll her eyes, "Please, as if I would let a fucking peasant like that impregnate me? I had E:U clean me out afterwards, my womb deserves the seed of... worthy men," Yiren pats your cheek, "But you'll do," She smirks haughtily, clearly reveling in her superiority over you, but it wasn't as if you could do anything about; after all, your cock cared little about your wounded pride. Her hand grasps your now thoroughly erect member, orienting it towards her slick entrance, "Feel free to finish whenever you'd like," Yiren informs you, "But do try and impress me..."

Muggy warmth engulfs your cock as Yiren sits on it, her pampered pussy devouring your length, causing you to groan plaintively as you struggle to hold on. She politely pauses when she reaches your hilt, allowing you to collect yourself before she starts moving again, a slow grind that morphs into a languid bounce. Yiren skirt rasps against your legs as she arrogantly rides your dick, displaying not even an ounce of pleasure as she methodically fucks you. Her face remains serene as her folds clench tightly around your shaft, and only when you start to moan for her does a half-smile graces her lips, "Is Mommy too tight for you? I can feel your balls pulsating, are you going to let go? Go on," Yiren purrs, "Disappoint me..." You shudder as you feel yourself giving in, you were so used to being showered with praise during sex, but being sternly scolded was surprisingly arousing; and your traitorous testicles seemed more than eager to fill this fertile princess... Yiren plants herself firmly against you when you creampie her, callously ruining your orgasm to produce the largest load possible, your semen flooding her pussy as you twitch beneath her., "My," Yiren smirks as she strokes your face, "I had low expectations, but you truly managed to reach even those. Surely this wasn't your first time? Whatever," Yiren places her finger on your lips to forestall any protests, "Now hush, Mommy needs to open her cervix."

Yiren breathes deeply, concentrating upon her body's little used muscles, and flexing her exposed core muscles rhythmically until she lets out the softest of moans, "I can feel it..." she kisses your sweaty forehead, "Congratulations, you're going to be a parent, I imagine Jihyo will be pleased," With that she gracefully unmounts you, allowing your excess cum to drip down her slender thighs, and glances at the clock on the wall, and lets out an unlady-like snort, "It seems we are blessed with a surfeit of time, at this rate we will be able to fit several rounds in with ease," she glances at you, "Well? Get it up again. You might have impregnated me, but I will be damned if I let the father of my child be such an embarrassment in bed," You blush brightly from her scornful words, it was hardly your fault that Mommy's pussy had been so breedable... But Yiren's tongue lashing made not only your cheeks flush with blood, as your manhood rises once more to the challenge, still slick with her juices and slathered with your own. The idol nods in satisfaction, "Well, at least you still have your youthful vigor," she stalks over to the abandoned chair and bends over it, sweeping her skirt up over the side of her hip to give you an unobscured view of her perky rear, "Pleasure your Mommy. I am curious to see how you perform with a bit more stamina in you."

Filled with fresh determination, you approach Yiren eager to prove her wrong with a more forceful showing. Her pussy was on clear display between her petite cheeks, its delicate lips already glistening from your earlier sex, primly shut once more as it awaits your member. With one hand on her hip, you press your cock against Yiren's slit, attempting to find her entrance, until a resigned sigh halts your efforts. Yiren looks back at you, "Oh. It's worse than I thought, Jihyo truly has been indulging you hasn't she?" Your face crumples in confusion, causing Yiren to roll her eyes, "Let me guess, whenever you're with a 'Mommy' you grope them for a time, they touch you a little, then they guide you between their thighs, and after a few pumps you fill them, and they tell you what a 'good boy' you are for not just fucking exploding on them before entering?" Your embarrassed silence is all the answer Yiren needs, "Has Jihyo not trained you at all?" she asks in exasperation, "You would think she would want her cousin to at least be serviceable between the sheets..." you mumble a pitiful response, "Oh, she hasn't let you fuck her yet? I'm honestly surprised," Yiren shrugs and waves her hand dismissively, "Whatever, it's time for you to learn how to pleasure a woman, dear."

"My pussy," Yiren lectures, "Is more than just some rude hole for you to shove your sweaty meat into. Rub it, spank it, poke at it with your cock, if you do not make me feel good, then I will simply ruin your next orgasm onto the floor," With that stern warning in mind, you do as she says, brushing your cockhead against her slit, relishing in the way it gushes juices around it as you stroke your tip up and down her lower lips. Yiren lets out a speculative noise, "Hmm, decent enough I suppose, now penetrate me, slowly this time. You are not pounding away at some cheap fleshlight, you are having sex with a lady, do try to treat me like one." Blushing, you try and do as she instructed, and having spent the last several minutes exploring her folds with your dick, you have a much better idea where you are supposed to insert it. The angle is still poor though, and Yiren eventually has to help guide you inside of her, the heat of her pussy welcoming your tip back into it. It is all you can do to stop yourself from immediately shoving yourself balls-deep inside of your Mommy, and you manage to push into her gradually. Yiren lets out a pleased sigh, "Very good, now begin thrusting, also if you finish inside of me before I let you, Mommy will be very displeased, understand? Good, now fuck me."

With your hands wrapped around Yiren's tiny waist, you do your best to please her. Her tiny ass barely even squishes against your crotch as you thrust into her, and the easy view of your cock filling her modestly sized pussy drives you wild; it looks as if you were impaling her with every pump. Your Mommy seems unperturbed by your efforts however, and her folds grip tightly around your shaft, the pink flesh of her sex dragging along it whenever you pull back. Much like a courtesan of old, Yiren's pussy is supremely skilled at pleasuring cocks, and soon you are once more on the edge, and are forced to slow down. Yiren giggles demurely, "Well, at least you learned to control yourself somewhat. Now then, angle your penis downwards, and hit my sensitive spot when you thrust," She obligingly lowers her butt to make things easier for you, but it still takes a few minutes of ineffectual thrusting before you are finally able to get it right. But of course, a few minutes fucking an idol's sublime pussy was enough to once more have you leaking precum inside of Yiren. Who clucks in annoyance when you slow down once more, "Again? Pity, it was actually starting to feel a touch pleasant," Yiren's surprising approval is enough to cause another welter of watery fluid to gush into her, and she sighs indulgently, "Oh very well, I suppose it is too much to hope you would actually become competent in bed so quickly," she slaps your hand, "Pull out, now. I have a reward for you..."

Following your Mommy's instructions, you stand awkwardly against the chair while she gracefully settles herself in front of you. Yiren stares up at you with that familiar half-smile of hers, no doubt amused by your obvious hesitation, her delicate makeup still immaculate even after her exhausting performance, as well as her less intensive sex with you. With seductive laziness, she pulls down her top, revealing her perky breasts, her smirk widening as you hump the air; they might be of modest size, but the sight of any Mommy's breasts was enough to excite you. Yiren languidly places her hand onto your cock, causing you to shiver, her nimble fingers wrapping themselves around your slick skin. Without warning she jerks you off, skillfully stroking your dick while maintaining stern eye contact with you. You gasp, pant, whine, shuddering from the intense stimulation of your Mommy's hand squeezing your cock mercilessly as she works your load out; it was all too much, you were going to get ruined on the floor for being a bad boy! But Yiren had other plans for your load, as she brings her face close to your oozing tip, "Cum for me. Now," she demands, and you blissfully comply.

Yiren's refined makeup, an entire hour of the beautician's hard work, is obliterated as vast ropes of steaming semen spew all over the idol's face. She purrs with pleasure as her face is inundated with jizz, her eyes drowning in it, her patrician nose covered in it, her elegant hairdo soaked in it, and all the while she continues to work your shaft until the final trickles of sludge burble out of your reddened tip and into her mouth. Yiren lets out a pleased noise as she cleans your cockhead with her tongue, "Impressive, your stamina might be lacking, but at least your loads are pleasantly sized," You beam at her praise, but her grip remains tight upon your manhood when you try and move back, "Did I say I was finished, that was not your reward, this is," and Yiren promptly puts it in her mouth. Your cock was still sensitive from its recent climax, so the stimulation from the idol's blowjob was enough to have you gibbering with pleasure. You write against the chair as Yiren expertly sucks you off, your seed drying upon her face even as she salaciously works yet more out of you. Her tongue swirls around your shaft while her head bobs up and down your length, her lips locked tightly around it even as her hands massage your balls and press against your taint. Not even a minute after your last orgasm, your next load is already spraying directly into Yiren's stomach; and being a dignified lady, she swallows every last drop without even a cough.

When Yiren finally releases you from her clutches, you collapse back into the chair, utterly exhausted even though you had really not put all that much work in. Your balls ached horribly, and your manhood was stained red with her lipstick, "You have been marked," your Mommy explains, "So when Jihyo spots it she will know it was me..." Yiren snorts at your confusion, "I'm teasing, she'll smell my pussy on you, and know exactly just who you've been inside." She lithely gets back onto her feet, clapping her hands for her attendants once more; honestly, you had not even noticed they had left. You scramble to cover yourself as the girls rush inside, adjusting the idol's outfit, but abstaining from cleaning off the jizz coating the various parts of her body. Noting your curiosity, Yiren explains, "It is an old custom for courtesans to receive their lover's last load upon their faces, both as evidence of their sexual prowess, as well as their lover's virility. I shall wear yours in celebration of my impregnation. Stand proud dear, I wouldn't let any common dross breed me." And with that, Yiren sweeps out of the room, trailing her attendants like a comet's tail behind her as she hurries to the stage. If her performance was anything like your private one, then the reception would be a rather sticky one.

Left to your own devices, your pull your clothes back on, but before you can leave, your cousin bustles through the door, no doubt out of breath from hurrying back from the company building. She pouts as she notices that you are alone, "Aw, did I miss it? Why did they leave you here..." Jihyo sniffs the air, her eyes narrowing, before looking pointedly at you, "I see, so you enjoyed yourself then?" You nod shyly, unsure as to what her reaction would be, but she nods in satisfaction, "Good, I was worried she wouldn't get knocked up from a few weeks ago, she always has been a prissy little bitch." Jihyo pats your head endearingly, "Well done, I'm proud of you, good boy!" You blush with pleasure as your cousin leads you back out to the car, passing by various finely dressed people as they hurry to reach their seats in time. Most of them stop to stare at the obviously pregnant and deliciously voluptuous idol as she saunters by, causing the slightest stirrings of jealousy in you. Jihyo allows your hands to roam where they should not during the car ride back, but she gently pries them off of her when they attempt to slip down her pants, "Patience, dear," she reassures you, "I'm due in a few weeks, and then after that we have our trip with Lisa and some other girls. Don't look so glum! Momo will be staying over to help with things while I'm busy pushing the baby out, and you know how much she enjoys pampering you..."

It was to your surprise, later that night when showering off, that you were unable to remove Yiren's lipstick from around your shaft; it seems like she had not been teasing after all about marking you...

[babyhatesreality]

The Sincerest Form

Pairing: Daddy!Stucky x little!F!reader

A/N- for @pahtoosh who said they loved Grumpy Bucky....<3

Warnings: DDLG (SSC), f! reader, reader is named but name scarcely used, pet names, baby eats oatmeal (a total warning- oatmeal is YUCK), baby being a lovable menace without realizing it, grumpy daddy, scolding, papa thinks it's all hysterical, and guess what- fluff.

YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN MEDIA CONSUMPTION. THIS STORY IS SFW- THE REST OF MY BLOG IS NOT NECESSARILY SO. MINORS DNI. I DO NOT CONSENT FOR MY WORK TO BE STOLEN, COPIED, OR TRANSLATED ONTO ANY OTHER SITE BUT MY OWN. Likes, comments and reblogs are deeply appreciated.

It had come about in the funniest way. To Steve, anyways.

One day at the breakfast table, Bucky's phone buzzed in his pocket. He generally tried to stay off his phone during meal times, but his phone went off about 5 times in 3 seconds, so he figured it was important. He pulled it out while Steve was trying to coax you to take another bite of your oatmeal.

"Come on princess, it's good for you," Steve said patiently. You and your wrinkled nose definitely thought differently. He chuckled and picked the spoon up from the bowl where you'd left it. He scooped a bit on, making sure to get a piece of peach with it. "This one has peaches on it, you like peaches," he cajoled. "Here comes the airplane!" He waved the spoon around, making cool airplane noises, and watched as your pouting little face smoothed out. You did love a good airplane. You finally relented and let him zoom the spoon into your mouth. While you swallowed, Steve scooped up another bite, this time with a blueberry on it. Just then, Bucky huffed as he looked at his phone.

"Everything okay?" Steve asked his beloved.

Bucky rolled his eyes, his brow screwing up in frustration, and let out a loud sigh. "Sam's driving me nuts. Again."

"What is it this time?" Steve asked as he turned his attention back to you and began making airplane noises again. It wasn't as hard getting you to eat this time- you were staring at Bucky and so were a bit distracted.

"Just more stupid stuff. He can't say anything simply- it has to be in ten different messages in the span of five seconds," Bucky said grumpily. "Why can't he just say 'gym in an hour'? Why does he have to send a thousand messages and stupid little pictures when four words would do?!" Steve smothered a smile. He knew Bucky hated the annoyance of his phone going off constantly, which is why Steve suspected Sam did it. "God, he's annoying."

Steve smiled consolingly at his husband, but didn't say anything. It would just make Bucky grumpier, and as adorable as Grumpy Bucky was, he didn't want to put him in a bad mood for the rest of the day. He focused back on you, and couldn't help but chuckle at the sight of your own wrinkled up and grumpy face, having just swallowed another bite of oatmeal.

"You look like Daddy when you make that face," Papa whispered loudly to you so Bucky could hear. At hearing those words, you turned curiously to see what Bucky looked like. Bucky was studiously ignoring Steve's playful jab and still glaring at his phone. Steve watched as you carefully studied Bucky's frown. You started trying to twist your face into the same expression Bucky was wearing. Steve had to bite the inside of his cheek at the exaggerated pout that was now gracing your cute little face.

"I'm gonna thrown my phone in the Hudson," Bucky grumbled, unaware of what was brewing next to him.

"I'm gonna throw my oatmeal in the Hudson," you instantly parroted, trying to copy his gruff and grumpy tone. That made Steve snort and caused Bucky to finally look up. When he got a look at the sour expression on your face, he huffed again, but gave a begrudged smile.

"Tell you what, Trouble, I'll drop my phone in your oatmeal, and that will take care of both of our problems. What do you say?" Daddy asked you, the twinkle returning to his eye at the end of his declaration.

"OKAY!" you agreed happily, stretching your hands out for his phone.

"No you don't," Papa said immediately, intercepting your little mitts. If he didn't, he had no doubt as to exactly what would have happened next. "Come on, let's finish your breakfast." You gave a loud sigh like Bucky had only moments ago, but let Steve guide the oatmeal laden spoon back into your mouth while trying to hold in his laughter.

This was only the beginning.

For the next week, whenever something annoyed or frustrated Bucky and you were around, you immediately adopted his scowl and tone, usually parroting what he said too. You even took to stomping around dramatically to give it extra emphasis. Steve thought it was absolutely hysterical. It usually snapped Bucky out of his grumpy mood in moments, seeing you playacting at being him and how incredibly cute you were.

Until it backfired.

Steve was away on a mission with Tony and Thor, and Bucky had to head to the offices with you in tow. That was enough to already make him grumpy, but Maria Hill was waiting for him the moment he stepped off the elevator.

"Sergeant Barnes," she said in that no-nonsense tone of hers. "Director Fury needs to see you immediately."

Bucky's blood turned to ice. "Steve...is he...." he choked out, automatically assuming the worst.

"Captain Rogers is fine," Maria said instantly, chagrined, especially when she caught sight of your little, wide eyes. "Fury just needs to talk to you about Operation Guillotine- he has an important update. Cap's mission is going well. Everything's fine." She cleared her throat, still feeling awkward. "Sorry," she added, low.

Bucky took a deep breath to calm his suddenly furious nerves, for your sake. "Fine," he grumbled, brushing past Hill while keeping a tight hold on your hand, his face crumpled into what looked to be a permanent frown. He knew that Maria hadn't meant to freak him- or you- out, but it still made him grumpy as hell.

"Fine," you parroted in the same grumpy voice as you began stomping down the hall alongside your daddy. Maria was taken aback at your tone- you were usually so happy-go-lucky. She was even more confused when you turned around and waved goodbye cheerfully to her, then resumed your stomping and pouting.

Bucky was still too lost in his own annoyance to realize that you were doing it again- mimicking his grumpiness as he huffed his way towards Fury's office. He didn't notice all the curious and confused looks as the two of you made your way down the hall, nor all the baffled agents wondering what the hell was going on with the two of you.

Bucky walked into Fury's office without so much as a knock. "Hill said you needed to see me?" he asked bluntly, still annoyed.

Fury looked up from his work. "Barnes. Yes, I-" he suddenly stopped as he got a good look at the twin scowls on your faces. "Everything...alright?" he asked a bit gruffly.

"Fine. What did you need?"

"We fine," you chirped too, your face completely at odds with your statement. "We grumpy."

THAT got Bucky's attention. He looked down at you, perplexed, then he realized that you were imitating him. Again. You turned your face towards him, nodded solemnly in solidarity, before turning your scowl back on the director. Bucky cleared his throat and took a deep breath before returning his gaze to the director.

"Ohhhhkay," Fury said, not sure how to take this. He decided to just ignore it. "Seems there was something more to the coded message we intercepted. Something we missed. Intel believes it has the location of the new lab. I'd like you to take a look at it again."

Bucky groaned out loud. "Come on, Natasha and I have already been over that thing a dozen times," he said. "I can't make information appear, Fury. I'm telling you, it's not there."

"It's not there, Fury!" you barked, frowning as hard as you could.

Bucky tugged your hand suddenly. "Trouble," he said in that warning tone. "Director Fury and I are talking." He cocked one eyebrow at you.

"I know. I'm helping."

"Well, right now, I need you to hush. Got it?"

Bucky was not happy at your deepening scowl, but he had bigger fish to fry at the moment. He turned his attention back to the baffled (and slightly amused) director. "What's up intel's ass that they think we missed something that big?"

"Yeah, what's up intel's-" your words were suddenly cut off by Bucky's large hand covering your mouth. You tried to squirm away but he wasn't letting you move an inch.

"I said HUSH," Bucky said, giving you The Eye. Once you finally stopped squirming, he lowered his hand, the scowl on his face even more prominent. So of course you had to follow suit and match his look, your face scrunched so tightly your eyes were nearly invisible.

Fury disguised his smile under the pretense of scratching his nose, before clearing his throat and continuing. "There were two more messages intercepted last night that have similar patterns to the original. And we've definitely got movement amongst their supply chain. I want you and Romanoff to take another look at it to see if you can connect the dots. This takes priority today, understood?"

"Understood," Bucky growled back, turning on his heel to leave.

"Bye Mr. Nick!" you called out cheerfully as Bucky turned. Bucky rolled his eyes but didn't say anything as you waved to the director.

"Bye, little one," Fury said, his expression softening ever so slightly. "I hope your day gets less...grumpy."

"Not likely!" you chirped happily, before resuming your Daddy Grumpy Face. Bucky stifled his embarrassed groan, hauling you into his arms instead and thundering down the hallway. People scurried to get out of his way, but he barely noticed.

"Katie, I told you to hush," Bucky scolded you quietly as he made his way towards his and Steve's office.

"Mr. Nick was talking to me, Daddy! I not RUDE."

"Yeah, well, when I tell you to hush, I mean hush."

"You TOO grumpy today, Daddy," you said, shaking your head. Just then- luckily for you- Natasha came around the corner.

"Well hey you two," she said lightly, sensing the tension and obviously seeing the twin scowls on your faces. "Bad morning?"

"We grumpy, Aunt Nat," you answered promptly. "WAY too grumpy."

"Excuse us, we'll be right back," Bucky growled, red faced. He pretended he couldn't hear Natasha snickering as he lumbered past her and stomped into his office, kicking the door shut.

Bucky plopped you down onto the desk. He put his hands on either side of you and leaned down into your face. You shrank down a bit. It finally dawned on you that you MIGHT be in a bit of trouble. "Kaitlyn," Daddy said in that low tone that meant business. Uh-oh. You could feel the Time Out coming. "What did I JUST say about hushing your mouth?"

"Um...."

"I told you to hush. Three times. And you didn't. And then you told Aunt Natasha that we were grumpy."

"We ARE."

Bucky sighed, trying to rein it in. "Baby, you don't say things like that around the office. You know better. And just because I'm in a bad mood doesn't mean that you have to be in one, okay?"

"But if YOU grumpy, then I grumpy Daddy!" you exclaimed, your eyes wide. You put your hands on either side of his face. "You don't gotta be grumpy alone!" You leaned forward and kissed his nose, surprising the hell out of him. "I no want you to be grumpy, so I be grumpy WITH you, okay?"

All of Bucky's annoyance and frustration instantly melted away at your loving words and gesture. "You've..been doing this so I won't be grumpy alone?" he asked, his wide blue eyes taking in every inch of your sweet face.

You nodded happily. "Yeah!"

Bucky felt something rise up in him...what was it? It was laughter. He ducked his head and burst out laughing, amazed and humbled by your innocent and pure love. He gathered you into his arms, this time cuddling you into his chest. Your soft giggle and snuggles back made his heart nearly burst.

"Well, thank you for not making me be grumpy alone," he whispered into your ear before blowing a raspberry on his cheek. "You still need to listen when I tell you to do something, though. Got it?"

"Got it. I sowwy, Daddy."

"I know you are, Trouble. But you know what makes me the most un-grumpy?"

"What?"

"When my baby's happy."

"OH! Okay!" you said, before giving him a huge hug around the neck. "Can I draw you a picture of us being un-grumpy?"

"Sure can."

"Will you hang it on the wall?"

"Already got the tape ready in my top drawer." "YAY!"

Bucky snuggled you once more before putting you down. You instantly dove into the small toy box that lived in their work office, knowing you had crayons in there somewhere, and got to work. Bucky chuckled again to himself, wondering how in the world he could ever have a grumpy day when he had sunshine itself personified in his love for you.

Although he did have another moment of grumpiness when Natasha sent Steve the camera footage of the interaction with Fury and Steve laughed himself sick.

[xylatox]

muddled hearts | xmh by the lovely altair! I'm so glad I finally get to read this, I'm such a loser for minghao fics.

Therefore, he didn't know your name or when you even got there. There hadn't been any murmur of a new girl, much less a pretty one – which was odd for the establishment. Full of meddling college students and a married couple who ran the place, there was bound to be some gossip. Something about your looks, your demeanor, anything – but no. Nothing had flown down the grapevine. — I already love this 🤭 Hao thinks reader is pretty hehe.

They looked at Minghao, who quietly loaded the shakers into the machine – wondering how he got you to speak to him.— loving that Hao is the exception and very convinced the other coworkers were just lowkey kinda mean ngl.

He soon learned that you did like to talk, you just had no one that you deemed worthy of your time. So when you arrived early on some shifts, you'd sit at the bar and ask Minghao things about himself. He'd gladly answer, mixing up non-alcoholic versions of his favorite cocktails for you as he talked in a soft voice. You both noticed the wandering eyes of your coworkers, but neither of you mentioned it to the other. — this is so cute I love them so much ah and it's only the beginning.

His fingers covered the edge of the bar so you wouldn't hit yourself, and you thanked him with a pat to his ribcage before slipping back out onto the restaurant floor with your pen flipping through your fingers like always. — physical interactions like this I always love like, it's something so simple but caring and it just warms my heart yknow.

Turns out that a bit out of the way for you, meant two blocks from Minghao’s apartment.  — fate hehe, cute.

I love them getting to know each other, like all the interactions thus far have been so sweet.—All you knew is that he was Xu Minghao, and if he was meant to break your heart – so be it.— not this being the way the first memory ends omg.

"Two things, gorgeous. Either your alternator is fucked and not charging your battery, or your starter engine has crapped out." He shrugged, and you couldn't bring yourself to react further than a groan. Your hands ran through your hair, and Minghao cooed lightly. — the pet name is driving me insane?? Neither of you worked tomorrow, so Minghao simply wrapped his arm around your shoulders (an act that neither of you would ever speak on, but made the both of you incredibly giddy) — the casual touches?? what if I go insane

You also didn't allow anyone else but Minghao into your life so closely. Only he knew where you lived, what troubled you, how your mother made you feel about yourself. Only he knew about your bad habits – your affinity for gossip, your extensive situationship issues with your ex-boyfriend, Jaehyun, and how you thought your apartment was entirely too expensive for a college student that was buying her dinner with coins. — omg Jaehyun mention?? (NCT??? I cannot help myself and think about him)

He didn't take you home. Instead, he drove around the city, his hand slotted in yours. It was nothing more than an attempt at a comforting gesture on his behalf, but you couldn't help the way your stomach fluttered slightly. You stared out the window as he spoke softly, telling you stories about his life and listening intently to yours. Eventually, the two of you wound up at a park you frequented as a child, one with a wishing well.  — going to sob, they're adorable. Also a moment to appreciate this beautiful writing like??

Hao inviting reader to his grad??? I'm soft. Jun and Hao!!! hehe I'm so happy they interact here. It's pretty sad how reader's parents didn't stay to take grad pics :((

So you figured your odd little crush was sorely misplaced – and added that you hadn't spoken to Jaehyun since the first time you slept over at Minghao's apartment was cause for the strange feeling of neediness in your stomach. Minghao was worth more than a rebound, and he was far more than you would ever deserve.— sobbing, tears. this is oddly sweet.

I love how it's mentioned reader becomes friends with Gyu, Tzuyu and Wonwoo after realizing they weren't a threat, like thats so cute.

"You're not me, pretty. And you're my friend, I'd go as far as even saying you're one of my best friends. I love you and I care about what stresses you out, and I'd give my left arm to make life easier for you." — this is so darn sweet what the hell.

Hao's flirting is absolutely killing me. THE KISS???? AHHHH he's so respectful when he realizes reader isn't ready wtf, I'll throw up.

Hao is so innlove with her :(( like — He pressed a kiss to your hairline, smoothing your hair down before slipping out of the kitchen. — on my knees.

Another moment to appreciate reader's relationship with Tzuyu, I love girl friendships. I love the more vulnerable moments reader an Hao share, especially after both are rejected from their grad programs:(

I love that we get this history of Cheol and Hannie's relationship too EEE!!

"Tell you what, pretty. I'll work my shift, and we can celebrate after. Just you and me." His hand squeezed your side gently, his eyes expectant of something – but you know you could say nothing and he'd still understand. He once told you that he thinks humans misunderstand almost everything… — they are so cute :(((((

"Because we're not together. We're friends, and we're roommates. We don't have that expectation of having to spend time together, because sometimes just brushing past one another when we're at work is enough. Sometimes waking up in the middle of the night to pee but having to wait because he's in the restroom is enough. Sometimes walking to the laundromat together is enough." You shrugged, before sighing.  — she says this but says they aren't together in the same breath, they're practically married.

"I'm sorry for snapping. It wasn't my intention but I can tell I've hurt your feelings, and I never want to hurt your feelings." His voice was soft, and you felt your throat tighten slightly. You weren't too sure why you were even crying, maybe it was reminiscent of being scolded for trying to do the right thing. — no cuz I'd cry too, they're both too sweet for their own good.

"You're amazing, Y/N. Stop trying to put yourself down, or act like you're not someone who deserves everything. You're soft and sweet and one of the kindest people I've ever come across. You offered to work someone's shift on your day off, not because you want the money, no; because you want them to spend time together and help their relationship continue to flourish. You think anyone just does that?" He scoffed, and you cleared your throat, shrugging. — I'll sob, I love Hao sm.

You kissed his hairline, wishing him a happy birthday over a bottle of soju that he took two sips of. Two sips too much, as his lips ghosted over yours as you spoke to each other about nothing – too close, but he saw the way you held yourself back. He saw the way you wanted to kiss him, the way your hands clenched at your sides as you forced yourself to move away. — I will pass out.

"You are a tumultuous flame and if I get burned, so be it. If I let the heat of your fire singe me to death, it wouldn't be a death in pain. I'd let it happen, over and over." — they both are so effortlessly romantic and so good with words??

I love how the end starts like the beginning, they made me smile like an idiot . God, I loved this so much. Altair, it's always a pleasure to read your work!! This was absolutely wonderful.

muddled hearts 🍹 x.mh [m]

↳ part of the 'lonely hearts cafe' collab!

synopsis: things take a turn for the better when you finally find a roommate to escape your incredibly overpriced apartment, but you don't expect to ruin the only relationship that matters to you in the process. genre: forced proximity au. coworkers/friends/roommates idiots to lovers. angst, fluff, suggestive themes. pairing: bartender!xu minghao x fem!waitress!reader | side pairings: restaurant owners!jeongcheol ; bartender!seungkwan x waiter!hansol ; chef!mingyu x hostess!tzuyu (twice) word count: 24k rating: 18+. minors do not interact. warnings: swearing, alcohol (obviously??) mentions of food/eating. reader has a strained relationship with her parents. jeongcheol/verkwan/tzugyu are all plot devices. unspoken pining, kissing. what to listen to: am pm - jay b, wheein ; you and me - lifehouse ; runnin' - the pharcyde ; no one noticed - the marías ; have u found what ur looking for? - ashton irwin ; on the line - blood orange author's note: the loml and the haologram namesake has officially debuted on this blog! while i am not entirely satisfied with this piece, that's okay and i still love the idea i put forth and the way i expressed what i could on the time crunch i gave myself. i will likely work on a spinoff for this, or just something to delve more into their backstory and developing them. special thank you to my lovely beta readers @diamonddaze01 @lovetaroandtaemin @tomodachiii <3 please enjoy!

A YEAR AGO…

"I need a Guinness." That was the first thing you ever said to Xu Minghao. You'd been hired by Seungcheol, one of the restaurant owners, three weeks prior but hadn't worked a shift with Minghao yet.

Therefore, he didn't know your name or when you even got there. There hadn't been any murmur of a new girl, much less a pretty one – which was odd for the establishment. Full of meddling college students and a married couple who ran the place, there was bound to be some gossip. Something about your looks, your demeanor, anything – but no. Nothing had flown down the grapevine.

You didn't bother to introduce yourself, either. Your eyes were pointed until he quirked a brow, scoffing out a laugh and pouring the drink for you. He'd said nothing as you took it, skirting around several clients and even a busboy and delivered it with a smile on your face to the awaiting patron…

…Who slipped a tip into your apron with a greasy smile, and you kept yours on your lips until you were out of the patron's line of sight. Then, tucked into the serving staff's corner, he saw the way your shoulders sagged, a look of disgust on your face as you shivered. He clicked his tongue to himself, but filed the vision away to the back of his mind. 

He spent the rest of the night silently giving you the drinks you asked for, or speaking to his regulars as he made your cocktails. You always waited patiently, your fingers spinning your pen expertly as you watched over the patrons of the restaurant. He watched the way you sped past everyone, wormed your way through gathered crowds, and even ducked under trays being carried by your fellow servers. 

You got your job done, and you got it done fast – your patrons visibly happy with your service and your apron slightly overflowing with tips when you slid behind the bar and tucked them into your lockbox without a word to him.

It wasn't until you bid your last patron a good night that he saw your shoulders relax, your fingers yanking the elastic out of your hair and shaking it out. The relief on your forehead was noticeable as you walked back to the bar, opening the fridge behind him and grabbing a can of the orange juice he used for some of the cocktails on the menu.

"D'you mind? I know they're counted." He shook his head as he skirted past you with his tray full of cups, the glasses clinking against each other while he made his way to the back. Your fellow servers were gathered around the heat of the kitchen, leaning against the wall or stretching their overworked limbs. He kept to himself, hearing them whisper about the new girl.

"She's so pretty." "Yeah, but she doesn't talk. I tried to talk to her back here a couple times, and she just keeps it short." "She's here to work."

"So am I, but at least I'm not rude." He set his dishes into the washer, cursing to himself when he realized he forgot his shakers at the bar. He was about to start the cycle when he heard the soft clanking of metal against metal, seeing your closed can of orange juice tucked into your shirt pocket as you held out his tray of shakers. 

"Thought you might need these, wouldn't want you to make unnecessary trips."

He thanked you with a smile, taking the black tray as you cracked open your can, shrugging as you turned on your heel and walked away. The servers looked appalled as you grabbed the sanitizer spray before walking out of the kitchen, a rag already hanging from your belt loop. They looked at Minghao, who quietly loaded the shakers into the machine – wondering how he got you to speak to him.

The answer was plain and simple – he was a crucial part of the services you provided as a waitress. You clearly didn't need help with your tables: he watched how easily you maneuvered through picky eaters and entitled elderly women, all in one night. He saw how you smiled and greeted people warmly and enthusiastically, something the other servers weren't very good at but hey — a buck is a buck.

He wormed back out of the kitchen amongst the whispers, rolling his eyes as he stretched his arms over his head. You were wearing headphones, nodding your head along to something as you wiped down every table and chair.

He slid back behind the bar and started his own closing duties, but he took a moment to take you in fully – the soft slope of your nose, the way your brows furrowed as you ran your rag over particularly sticky spots. The purse of your lips as you mouthed along to whatever it was that you were listening to.

"Do you need any help?"  

You were in front of the bar now, holding one of your earbuds in your hand as you raised a brow at him. He shook his head before extending his hand out to you.

"I don't believe we've met. I'm Minghao."

You were wary as you shook his hand, but your grip was nice and firm as you did so. 

"Y/N. Sorry if I was kind of emotionless during the shift, it helps me focus better if I'm not talking to people while I work." He shook his head again, as if to say no worries, before reaching under the bar and pulling your lockbox for you. You thanked him softly as you took it in your hands, walking away towards Seungcheol and Jeonghan's office to do your tip-out for the night. He finished his duties quickly, even managing to rearrange the cups and shakers for the morning bartender as the servers came to him one by one and gave him his share of their tips.

Until you came back out with a soft smile on your lips, your hair now loosely tied up and your apron slung over your shoulder as you held a wad of cash out to him, far thicker than any of the other servers. He'd been counting the leftover mixers, crossing out your orange juice as a markout as you slipped the money into his hand.

"For your help. Thanks."

"It's my job, no need to thank me." "Doesn't hurt. Have a good night, Minghao." "You too, Y/N." He smiled back as you finished what was left in your can of juice, tossing it as you made your way out of the building. He followed shortly after, walking out a few of the other servers to their cars in the parking lot for good measure. He never really spoke to them either, despite having worked with them for a little over a year – but he was a gentleman if nothing else.

The next few shifts he worked with you were like that, too. You'd smile at him a bit and ask for things with a nicer tone of voice. He still delivered and watched you from afar, slightly amazed at your abilities to satisfy all your patrons – couples, families, even that one elderly woman who always sent her steak back because it was never done well enough…she hadn't sent it back the night you served her.

You always walked out first, handing Minghao thick stacks of cash and stealing cans of orange juice. It got to the point where he would set yours aside from the counted lot, marking it out in the system before they shut down for the night. The other servers watched your interactions – short and sweet, but still far more than you'd ever attempted to interact with them.

He soon learned that you did like to talk, you just had no one that you deemed worthy of your time. So when you arrived early on some shifts, you'd sit at the bar and ask Minghao things about himself. He'd gladly answer, mixing up non-alcoholic versions of his favorite cocktails for you as he talked in a soft voice. You both noticed the wandering eyes of your coworkers, but neither of you mentioned it to the other.

He noticed that you never answered any questions about yourself, opting to spin the question back on him. He let it slide, but he knew you understood that eventually, you'd have to open up, too. When you did decide to do so was completely up to the universe.

It wasn't until the compliments started that the two of you really started talking – it started as something subtle and quiet. Minghao commented on your earrings or choice of lipgloss, and you said you liked his hair and the way he styled his jewelry. You would both laugh over light coworker gossip or comments about how easily Jeonghan got under Seungcheol's skin. 

You started greeting him when you'd swing by the bar for any alcoholic beverage, and he'd pause his flirting with his regulars to give you his undivided attention. This is how you learned that he had a way with body language – his eyes were always grazing over someone's face, his shoulders set back in confidence, brushing his fingers lightly over whoever was grabbing their drink.

This included you, but neither of you said anything about it. You'd let his fingers swipe over yours occasionally, choosing to smile and thank him as you went about your shift. The regulars noticed the way his attention was no longer fully on them, and some complained, but some spoke directly to Minghao about it – saying how cute it was for him to be crushing on the new girl.

He wasn't, but he didn't care to clear it up if it meant it got you more tips.

One night, things were as normal – it was a busy Friday evening, and you slid behind the bar to stuff your cash into your lockbox for the third time before closing. His fingers covered the edge of the bar so you wouldn't hit yourself, and you thanked him with a pat to his ribcage before slipping back out onto the restaurant floor with your pen flipping through your fingers like always. He watched you zip around, smiling widely as you took orders, casually flirting with patrons around your age, taking group photos with cell phones and cameras. 

You stole your can of orange juice, helped Minghao with his dishes and did your closing duties. You got tipped out by Jeonghan and gave Minghao his share, bidding him a good night before waltzing out of the restaurant. You skipped to your car, expecting a smooth drive home and ending your good night on your comfy couch with a Pilsner and a bag of chips…

When your car simply wouldn't start.  No big deal, you'd told yourself. You tried turning your headlights on, but nothing happened. This could mean one of two things: your battery had crapped out and just needed a jump, or tonight was just the night you'd be walking the twenty blocks home. You clicked your tongue before sighing and resting your forehead on the fuzzy steering wheel cover.

Minghao had watched this entire ordeal from the door of the restaurant, finishing a conversation with Seungcheol before stepping out and calling out your name. Your ears perked up, your eyes tired as you looked up and saw him walking over. He smiled as you pouted, opening your car door and explaining the situation.

"Not a problem, I can give you a lift." "I couldn't ask you to do that, Minghao." "You're not. I'm offering."

It went back and forth like that for about ten minutes before Minghao reached out and plucked your keys out of the ignition. You huffed as he jingled them, throwing your apron over your shoulder and manually locking all your doors before slipping out.

“I live a bit out of the way.” “I do, too. Don’t worry about it.”

Turns out that a bit out of the way for you, meant two blocks from Minghao’s apartment. 

It also turns out that the two of you had much more in common than just working at Seungcheol and Jeonghan’s restaurant.

You both loved art, fashion…the idea of flirting and making people think something was going to happen. You were both studying but at two different universities, and worked at the restaurant to save money for graduate school. He finds out that you're almost too big of a Bloody Mary fan, and nothing stops you from yucking a Piña Colada enjoyer's yum. He doesn't drink, and the revelation makes you snort, until you realize he's serious and roll your eyes subtly.

And all of this is something you find out as you sit in his car outside of your apartment complex, the heat cranked up and his radio playing AM PM by Jay B and Wheein on the lowest volume. He speaks softly, just like he does at the restaurant – and you notice his eyes almost glued to your face as you reciprocate. A few shy laughs are shared until he says something about Mingyu and his habit of stealing cheese curds off the customer trays, making you snort and hit your head on his window. He apologizes profusely but the sentiment is waned by his own rickety giggle, making you flush embarrassedly and shove him lightly.

The night ends when he offers to walk you up to your apartment, but you decline, holding your purse tightly. He still gets out of his car, perches on the hood and watches you duck into the heavy greenery that ornaments the entryway, hearing your work shoes click against the cold cement steps. He waits at least ten minutes before leaning back on his car, taking a deep breath in the chilly November air and pushing off. He slides back into the driver's seat, not noticing the way you look down at him from your second floor apartment. You peeked at him through the wooden blinds of your bedroom, the soft thundering in your chest something you couldn't figure out.

All you knew is that he was Xu Minghao, and if he was meant to break your heart – so be it.

EIGHT MONTHS AGO…

"Need a ride?"

You scoffed to yourself, hearing Minghao's voice across the parking lot. Your shoulders were slumped, your head resting defeatedly against the steering wheel of your 2002 Nissan that once more, refused to start. Why? You have no idea.

"No. It'll start. It has to start." You muttered back, seeing him approach the side of your vehicle. He dons a sympathetic smile as he leans in the window, his fingers grazing the fuzzy leopard print wheel cover. You ignored the manicure you'd been admiring your entire shift, the blotted maroon a perfect tone against his skin – and cranked your ignition.

Chchchch.

"Try again." Chchchch.

He glanced up at you before unlocking your door from the inside and yanking it open. He reached under your dash, popping your hood gingerly and snaking out from under the steering wheel. You only eyed him tiredly as he slid in front of your car, setting your hood up on the prop rod and tinkering around. You couldn't help but let your eyes close slightly, the soreness in your muscles taking over just as he popped back into your window. You jolted out of the light slumber, the crease between your brows deepening in the stark spring moonlight.

"Two things, gorgeous. Either your alternator is fucked and not charging your battery, or your starter engine has crapped out." He shrugged, and you couldn't bring yourself to react further than a groan. Your hands ran through your hair, and Minghao cooed lightly.

"C'mon, I'll give you a lift home. We'll get Cheol to pay for a tow." He wiggled his brows, making you let out a noise of amusement. You sighed, nodding silently as he once more took your keys out of the ignition. You grabbed your items, swinging your apron over your shoulder and locking your doors manually before slinking out and letting Minghao shut your door. 

You shook your head in disbelief, absently resting your forehead against his bicep with a sigh.

"I'm so tired."

Apparently, tired meant that you were almost about to fall asleep standing up. Neither of you worked tomorrow, so Minghao simply wrapped his arm around your shoulders (an act that neither of you would ever speak on, but made the both of you incredibly giddy) and led you to his car. He opened the door and helped you climb in, even going as far as buckling your seatbelt for you despite your whining protests that you could do it yourself.

"I know you can. Just let me help you, yeah?"

You gave in without a second thought, your eyes fluttering shut as he slid into the driver's side and started his car. You had turned your head towards him and muttered some words quietly.

Something that sounded like thank you, followed by a slightly more intelligible string of words.

"If I fall asleep, I give you full permission to leave me on my doorstep like a package."

He only snorted, knowing he would not ever do that to you. Rolling his eyes, he fiddled with the radio, hearing You and Me by Lifehouse playing on his favorite station. He kept it on as he pulled out of the parking lot, seeing Seungcheol staring in his direction with wide eyes as he walked Jeonghan to their shared car. Minghao only shrugged, waving quickly before turning out into the street and driving down the road.

It was peaceful, watching you sleep. The way your lashes kissed the fat of your cheeks, the way your lips were pouty and he resisted the urge to wipe your chin of a bit of drool that had begun to spill out. He bit down on his lip to hold in his laughter as you stirred, your thumb instinctively coming to your face to wipe at it. You peeled your eyes open, the whites slightly bloodshot and your face contorting in the soreness you felt. "Long day, huh?" He whistled as he flicked on his turn signal, and you only managed to hum in response. You blinked at him, his eyes catching yours as you stared into him. He raised his brows in confusion, and you shrugged your shoulders as much as your fatigue allowed.

"Why are you so nice to me, Hao?"

He only smiled, clicking his tongue as he took the turn down the creepy backroad neither of you liked and often discussed when you had some down time at work. "I thought we were friends, Y/N?"

He saw the way you leaned your head back on his headrest, nose scrunched as you began to settle deep in thought. Were you friends? He thinks so. He thinks setting aside your daily orange juice can means that he's your friend. He thinks giving you lifts home, means that you trust him. That's a crucial part of friendship, isn't it? Trust?

Maybe the subtle flirting he'd been dishing out wasn't so friendly, but he certainly desired to be your friend. He liked your eager conversation, a drastic change in comparison to how stoic you had been upon first meeting him – and how uninterested you were in everyone else you worked with. Aside from Mingyu in the kitchen and Tzuyu the hostess, you had absolutely no interest in talking to anyone but Minghao.

You also didn't allow anyone else but Minghao into your life so closely. Only he knew where you lived, what troubled you, how your mother made you feel about yourself. Only he knew about your bad habits – your affinity for gossip, your extensive situationship issues with your ex-boyfriend, Jaehyun, and how you thought your apartment was entirely too expensive for a college student that was buying her dinner with coins.

"I guess you're right. We should hang out one day, instead of just you giving me pitiful looks when my car craps out on me."

Your tone had been light, but he knew you weren't joking. No matter how often this happened, you insisted what Minghao was dishing out was pity. It wasn't – it was a break. A chance to worry about things later, or tomorrow, because he also understood what it was like to be stressed. He also understood what it was like to have a car let him down time after time, but he had had no one to take that mercy upon him. He'd walked home in pouring rain, risked getting sick, slipped one too many times.

A favor, was what he was offering, if anything.

You just didn't know how to accept help. It was one of your flaws that made itself known without a single word from you.

"I'm free tomorrow. I don't work; I took the day off." "I'm free, too. I'll text you when I wake up. Maybe we can get brunch?"

You would not end up texting Minghao, because you were knocked out – too knocked out to be woken up – by the time that the two of you reached your apartment. He knew your keys were in your purse, but after three attempts at waking you up, he gave up. He drove the two blocks to his complex, snagging the perfect spot in front of his entrance.

He hadn't been too sure of what to do, so he left you in his car with the engine running to duck into his apartment – returning within a few minutes with a pair of blankets for you and him. He opened your door and leaned your seat back slowly, before throwing the blanket over you and moving your belongings to his backseat. He climbed back into the driver's side, scrolling on his phone for a bit before peering over at you. Still sound asleep, as the clock struck midnight. 

He hummed, closing his eyes for a moment.

A moment turned into three hours, when he heard your phone start ringing in the cupholder. It jolted him awake, his eyes narrowed as he read the blurry name out – Jaehyun.

He declined the call. Once. Twice. Six times, he declined Jaehyun's call. He turned your phone off after that, but you had stirred enough from the sheer sound of him fumbling around. Your eyes were bloodshot as you blinked before realizing you were still in his car.

"Shit, I'm sorry. Have we been here long?" He only smiled, gesturing at the blanket on your body. Your eyes widened as much as they could in their sleep-swollen state, before he flashed his phone screen at you.

3:13am.

"Hao! Why didn't you wake me up!?"

"I certainly tried. I drove around your complex twice before deciding it was futile. We're outside my apartment, if you want to crash here. I'm in no position to drive now."

You had scoffed tiredly (read: with embarrassment), before the urge to stretch took over – the blanket slipping down your legs as you twisted your torso and popped your back. Minghao only giggled tiredly, letting you pout at him.

"I don't have a toothbrush here."

"I have spares for guests. And I have a guest room, so it's not like you'd be taking over my couch or anything. There is always going to be a special space for you, you're my friend."

And you wanted to be his friend so badly.

"Fine. But I'm buying breakfast." "Sure, whatever makes you feel better."

You did not end up buying breakfast. In fact, after you allowed Minghao to help you get situated in his guest room, you didn't even wake up until well in the afternoon. The soft sheets, the absolute dream of a mattress…

The gentle scent of his detergent on the clothes he made you wear to bed while he stayed up an extra two hours – washing and ironing your work uniform. He even took your socks.

Granted, he also did not wake up until late that day. The two of you jerked the doors of the respective rooms open within five minutes of each other, Minghao sluggishly standing in his kitchen with his forehead against the cool steel of his fridge. He held a carton of eggs in his hand, your mouth occupied by the toothbrush he'd given you the night before.

"Eggs?" "I don't even want to cook, I just want to order in." "My treat. Consider it a thank you for letting me crash here." He had looked up then, a quirk in his brow as his lips twitched into a small smirk.

"Don't thank me for being a good friend. That's what you're supposed to do, Y/N."

He didn't allow you to pay for delivery. He didn't even allow you to bicker with him when he shoved you into the bathroom, insisting you shower while waiting for the food to arrive. He was a bit like a parent in that sense – forcing you to take his help and hospitality – and even offering to blow-dry your hair when you exited the bathroom in yet another set of his loungewear, the sweatpants low on your hips as you sat down in front of him and allowed him to do as he pleased.

Something about the domesticity of Minghao brought you comfort. He was gentle and kind, and entirely way too nice for your own good. You had this idea that you had to earn niceties, and Minghao was actively challenging that perspective with the way he wormed himself into your heart. Unlike the parasite, though, you were sure that loving him in whatever matter presented itself would not kill you.

He attempted to drive you home around midnight, the two of you far too excited to let the night end – when your phone began ringing again, this time as he pulled into a gas station. He sighed, "Take care of that. I'll be back."

Your ex-boyfriend told you he was at your apartment and asked why you weren't answering the door. You admitted that you weren't home and insisted that he went home – that you weren't interested in seeing him. He took it pretty hard, trying to convince you that he wanted nothing more than to see you, but Minghao arrived just as you snapped on him and told him that this odd situation was not working in anyone's favor.

Jaehyun insisted that he still loved you – but you said you wouldn't be seeing him again and hung up. You blocked his number before the bombardment of texts could flood in, resting your head against the seat and sighing. You gave Minghao a worried look, earning a soft laugh from him as he reached over and ran his fingers through your hair.

"Everything is going to be okay in due time. We'd be nothing in life if we didn't struggle a bit." He didn't take you home. Instead, he drove around the city, his hand slotted in yours. It was nothing more than an attempt at a comforting gesture on his behalf, but you couldn't help the way your stomach fluttered slightly. You stared out the window as he spoke softly, telling you stories about his life and listening intently to yours. Eventually, the two of you wound up at a park you frequented as a child, one with a wishing well. 

The two of you got down and headed straight for that well, Minghao holding a few coins he was willing to part ways with in his hand. He gave you half of them, telling you to make your wishes as he thought of his. He watched you intently, your eyes closed and thick lashes fluttering against your cheeks, lips pouty as you murmured to yourself. He was barely able to hear you, leaning a bit closer.

"I wish to be happy."

He closed his eyes after hearing that.

He knew in his heart that he couldn't be solely responsible for your happiness, but he could certainly aid in it. He was your friend, and he was determined to see that wish come true, even if it meant sacrificing his own time and energy to see it happen for you. Be it what may, he was hell-bent about it, within seconds of hearing you say it.

So much so, that when he dropped his 500 won coin, he too wished for you to be happy.

It was the least he could do at that moment.

He actually drove you home after that, and you invited him in. He stayed for all of two hours, just talking to you and keeping you company as you settled things around your apartment. Once more, the topic of rent being way too much came up – and he asked if you wanted a roommate.  You had snorted, insisting that you could handle rent on your own.

Minghao went home that night with another plan in mind.

SIX MONTHS AGO…

"Graduation is coming up. I know we've only just started getting close, but I got you a ticket to mine in case you'd like to be there." The casual comment had made you choke on your strawberry lemonade. He offered a napkin, smiling mischievously at you as you scoffed, wiping your lips carefully. He'd invited you out to lunch on yet another day off, but this time, the two of you were nicely dressed up. So much so, that your waitress thought you were a couple on a date. Neither of you made the move to correct her.

"Minghao, you can't just say that so casually." You muttered, but there was a twitch in your lip that gave you away. He caught it almost instantly, reaching into his bag and pulling out your ticket – watching you reach into your purse and pull his ticket out. Both graduations were on the same day, yours in the morning and his in the afternoon – just barely two hours apart. Enough that you'd be able to have a luncheon with your family and still make it to his right on time.  "You'll be celebrating with your family afterward, right?" "We're having a small party. A few of my friends will be there, and I'd like you to attend if it's possible. I know you probably have your own things to do."

You didn't, just the lunch. Something about your accomplishments was never enough for your family to celebrate, and they were of the breed that believed graduation was simply a part of life – nothing worth celebrating. Minghao didn't need to know that, though.

"Sure. I'll be there."

And it didn't take long for the day to spin around. You were dressed in your favorite white dress, covered slightly by your forest green graduation gown. Minghao met your family – your mother giving him a quick smile before tugging your father into the stadium. You offered an apology and said that one of your lifelong friends, Junhui, would be arriving soon, and Minghao could sit with him. You stuck around until he did, introducing the two and scurrying away to get set up with your classmates.

Funnily enough, Minghao and Junhui hit it off really well – so much so that when your name was called and you crossed the stage, they cheered so loudly that your parents looked away in embarrassment. You beamed up at your friends, waving excitedly and hopping down to your seat. The ceremony was over quickly, and your parents were nowhere to be found for photos.

It bummed you out, and your friends both noticed. You called their phones relentlessly, to no avail – making Minghao and Junhui take you to lunch on their own. You still enjoyed it, but they could tell that you were not happy. Neither of them made a statement, but Minghao managed to find a last minute ticket for Junhui to attend his graduation with you and invited him to the party as well.

You and Junhui sat in the stands an hour later, holding a huge bouquet you'd ordered a few days in advance – and sat with his parents, who eagerly admitted their glee in Minghao finding friends so easily. You enjoyed the pride his parents had in their son, feeling the same love that Minghao so eagerly poured over you with no remorse. You could tell how loved he had been growing up, how every single part of him was a part of them and then some.

How Minghao was truly someone made of love, by love, for love.

You cheered loudly with his family as he crossed the stage, finding his eyes as he looked up. The maroon of his gown did wonders for his skin, and you hated the way your cheeks warmed as he winked at you. Junhui elbowed you lightly, a knowing look in his eyes that made you scoff and shove him softly.

"We've been friends since we were kids, Y/N. You don't fool me."

However, it didn't stop you from trying. To you, Minghao was just your friend – you had no intent to ever take things further than that. Much like he slowly picked up on your flaws and bad habits, you did his – his subtle flirting with regulars, the way he had no shame in giving free drinks away if he thought someone was cute. It made you overthink everything about his way of acting with you – how easy it was to distinguish that he would never have a romantic feeling towards you if this was how he acted towards patrons.

So you figured your odd little crush was sorely misplaced – and added that you hadn't spoken to Jaehyun since the first time you slept over at Minghao's apartment was cause for the strange feeling of neediness in your stomach. Minghao was worth more than a rebound, and he was far more than you would ever deserve.

You spent the rest of the day enjoying delicious food prepared by his parents and spending hours dancing with Junhui and Minghao in turns. You blushed severely when Minghao's parents asked if you were interested in Minghao, quickly refusing the idea and insisting you were his friend and nothing more. You later saw Minghao blush all the same, his mother looking over his shoulder at you and making him do the same – before you saw his plush lips form around the negative response of No, she's just my friend.

You ignored the sinking feeling and focused on the party – with Mingyu swinging by for an hour before going back out to hang with his girlfriend, Tzuyu, and his best friend, Wonwoo (and they were all coworkers of yours that you allowed yourself to grow closer to after realizing they were no threat.) You took dozens of photos with everyone, had plenty to eat and reluctantly bid goodnight to a tired Junhui that drove back to his girlfriend's apartment after checking that Minghao would take you home. 

The two of you stayed for a little longer, watching all the guests leave. You walked around his parents' home and helped them clean up silently, hearing his mother praise you quietly to her son. Your refusal to acknowledge it made everything easier, grabbing an apron from the kitchen and tasking yourself with washing dishes alongside Minghao's father. He made soft conversation, and you understood where Minghao got his doting personality. It made you think way too hard about the man you called your friend to everyone's face, including his.

At the end of the night, you cried when Minghao presented you with a graduation gift in the privacy of his car – a pair of earrings and a lease. A lease to a two-bedroom, one-and-a-half bathroom apartment he found all on his own, after more complaints about your rent being too high came about. He admitted that he'd initially started looking for places solely for you, but later came to the idea that maybe you would like some company. He fully admitted that he would have no problem if you denied his request to be your roommate, but seeing as the two of you had also planned on going to graduate school…he thought that maybe splitting costs would be easier.

"You can say no. I know it's a bit presumptuous of me to jump the gun like this. I've already signed it, but the leasing office told me it was okay if I wound up taking the place alone. I just thought I'd run it by you."

You had only blinked up at him through teary eyes, your lips pouty as you whined.

"Why are you always so nice to me, Xu Minghao? I would've never thought to do this."

"You're not me, pretty. And you're my friend, I'd go as far as even saying you're one of my best friends. I love you and I care about what stresses you out, and I'd give my left arm to make life easier for you."

Anyone else would've seen this as an admittance of romantic feelings.

Anyone else.

"Minghao, I can't accept this." "Yes, you can. You don't have to be strong all the time. I'm here. I care. Just let me help you, okay?"

You don't know how, but just the soft lilt of his voice made you fold. You signed your name in blue ink that very same night and rode with him back to your apartment. You invited him in, the two of you tired from forced socialization and flopping on your couch. Neither of you said much as you scrolled through Hulu, your television lighting up your living room along with the few candles on your coffee table. "You never tried your earrings on." He muttered next to you, his eyes closed as you settled on Coyote Ugly. Your lips formed an O-shape, and you nodded as you dug them out of your purse. You popped the velvety box open, the diamond studs twinkling back at you. "Allow me." He leaned forward, plucking the box from your fingers and gingerly removing them from the backing. He watched silently as you took your signature gold hoops out, turning to face him with a tired smile on your lips. "Ready?" "Be gentle, I'm sensitive." 

He scooted slightly closer, nimble fingers softly tilting your jaw toward him. You ignored the way the hair on the back of your neck stood on end as he tucked a stray curl behind your ear, thumbing at your earlobe gently before slipping the earring through.

You heard him mumble to himself but didn't get a chance to ask questions as he carefully slid the backing on and quickly put on the other one for you. He nodded in approval, both hands brushing your face as he pushed your hair back. "You look pretty in diamonds."

You scoffed, rolling your eyes as his hands left your face. You dug a compact mirror out of your purse, using the low light of the room to see. Long lashes fluttered in the reflection as you shifted the mirror around, your manicured fingers lightly tracing the shell of your ear as you took in the subtle sparkle of the gemstones.

"You didn't have to, you know. I didn't get you anything."

You slumped on the couch, resting the side of your head on one of the thick cushions while looking up at him. He propped his arm up on the back of the couch, shrugging his shoulders as he leaned his head on the palm of his hand. "Having you is enough. Did I tell you that I like your dress? I don't think I told you."

Your eyes only widened before you felt your cheeks heat and cleared your throat. You glanced down at your dress, the scattered sequins across the white dress glinting in the low light. An odd feeling settled in your stomach as you ran your hands down the fabric before looking back up at him to see his eyes boring into you.

Like he could see what you were thinking.

"You're beautiful, but I don't have to tell you that. You already know." He said pointedly, and you scoffed. You look away, turning your head to face the ceiling. You follow the slow spin of the fan, before you glance back at him through the corner of your eye. He's still looking at you, but with a soft smile and a raise of his brows as if he's waiting for you to tell him what's on your mind.

"You don't, you're right. Sorry." You muttered, crossing your legs at the knee. You could feel the soreness in your calves from being on your feet all day, the straps from your shoes so tight that they'd imprinted on your skin. Minghao shifted next to you, and you could feel the heat of his gaze raking across your face.

"Y/N?"

You turned to face him, "Hm?"

He smiled, shaking his head. "Nothing."

You scowled, sitting up quickly and tucking your legs under you. "I hate when people do that, Hao. Tell me what you were going to say."

He only chuckled, shrugging his shoulders as he leaned back on your couch, tucking his hands under his head. "I wasn't going to say anything, sweetheart. Just…yeah."

"Xu Minghao." "Ooh, full name. Don't hurt me, I might like it." You gaped, smacking his arm lightly. He grabbed your wrist loosely, making you fail at biting back your laughter when his other hand tickled your ribs. "M-Minghao! I don't need to know that!"

"Don't you, though? I know that you like your hair pulled, you told me like three days ago when we were tipsy during movie night. Call it an even exchange of information." He nodded, and you only attempted to swat his hands away from digging into your ribcage as a scream of laughter escaped your throat. He grinned, pinning you against the cushion as you squirmed under him.

"N-Not fair! You're s-stronger than m–AH!" You choked on your own laughter, thrashing as he stopped, squeezing your sides gently with a mischievous smile painted on his face. The glint in his eyes made your stomach swirl slightly as he looked down at you, and it took a few moments for you to realize just how close his face was to yours. You didn't dare look at his lips, forcing your eyes to be glued to his as you swallowed quietly. He shifted back to sit down, allowing you to sit up slightly and clear your throat – when your eyes flickered to his lips.

Soft and slightly glossy from his strawberry lip balm. Lush. So pink and pretty and perfect.

"Y/N?"

"Uh huh?"

Your eyes darted back up to his, noting the soft blush on his cheeks in the low light of the television. He looked away, squeezing his eyes shut – when your body took over your mind, your hand softly tilting his jaw back to look at you. Your thumb ran across his lower lip, pulling it down slightly to watch it spring back, your eyes meeting his once more as you pressed the pad of your thumb onto his lips.

Something about his gaze made you feel insane.

And feeling him kiss your thumb while looking into your eyes made you break.

You leaned forward, holding his jaw gently as you pressed your lips against his chastely. He melted in slightly, his hand ghosting over your hip for balance when realization sank into your skin and you pulled away.

"Shit. I'm…Minghao, I'm so–" He didn't let you finish, rolling his eyes as he pulled you towards him by your wrist, kissing you with purpose. You only let out a noise of surprise as he practically manhandled you onto his lap, his hands moving to cradle your cheeks. Your eyes fluttered shut as he kissed you, his lips soft against yours and making you feel like your very being was about to combust into flames. You couldn't help but tighten your legs around his, feeling him smile against your lips with a soft laugh.

Your hands fisted his shirt as he pulled away from your lips, his hand moving to the nape of your neck and tilting your head back while the other splayed across your thigh. His lips trailed down your jaw, a soft mewl escaping your throat as he nipped at your earlobe.

"Sound so pretty for me, sweetheart."

The light scrape of his teeth against your neck doesn't allow for many words to slip from your lips, only a choked whimper as you carded your fingers through his hair, pulling slightly as he littered gentle nips across the expanse of your neck and chest. His hand in your hand moved to your back, resting just above the zipper of your dress when he looked up at you through his lashes.

"Can I–" "Yes." His fingers carefully pulled the zipper down, the tight flutter sleeves of your dress loosening around your shoulders and falling slightly. Your hand tugged at the knot of his tie as he reconnected your lips, his hands sliding around your waist as you pulled it off and tossed it to the side. Your fingers fumble with the buttons of his shirt as his tongue slips into your mouth, his hands moving down slightly and palming your thighs before moving back from your face.

“We should stop, shouldn’t we?” He mumbled against your lips, making you shake your head as your hands fisted his shirt, your thumbs tracing the pearly buttons. Your fingers pulled at the rest of the buttons, tugging the hem of the shirt out from under his slacks as he grabbed your wrists gently.

“Want you to touch me, Hao. Please?” Your voice had a hint of something a little desperate, that same hint shown as a glint in Minghao's eyes as he breathed heavily against your lips. You kissed him chastely, feeling him groan beneath you and let go of your wrists to run his hands up your thighs, his fingertips barely breaching the hem of your dress.

“Wanna feel you. Wanna taste you…fill you up…can I, pretty girl? Will you let me?”

You weren’t sure how you found your voice, but you squeaked out an excited yes anyway. The rest is a blur – him pulling your dress over your head and tossing it to the side, running his hands up and down your body as he meshed your lips with his with a hunger that you couldn't describe. His fingers were cool against your back as he undid the clasp of your bra, his teeth nipping at your lower lip as you whined against him.

"Are you sure you want to do this? We can stop right now." He mumbled, holding your bra together as he looked up at you. Uncertainty flashed in your eyes, and he gave you a soft smile. "Y/N, it's okay. Are you okay?"

He clasps your bra back, his hands moving to tug his shirt off his shoulders and drape it over you. You're silent as you shove your arms through it, and Minghao quietly buttons it for you, before tucking your hair behind your ear gently. "Hey. Talk to me, I'm here." He murmured, and you just tongued your cheek, running a hand through your hair.

"I'm sorry. I thought I'd be ready–"

"Don't. Do not apologize for not being ready, or changing your mind, or anything like that. Not now, not ever, and especially not to me. Okay?"

Your face burned in embarrassment, but it quickly slipped away as Minghao enveloped you in a warm embrace, your own arms wrapping around his neck as he held you close. "You deserve to be more than some rebound, Hao. I'm sorry." "Don't be sorry when there is nothing to be sorry for. We can forget all about this, you know? Just a little kiss. I'm sure lots of friends have kissed and moved on." You weren’t sure you could move on, not when Minghao held you until early morning, his breathing soft against your neck. Not when the two of you inevitably moved into your bedroom and slid under your bed sheets together, Minghao's arms wrapped around your shoulders and suffocating you with his soft cologne that you can't get enough of. 

You spent hours awake while he ran his fingers through your hair, just thinking about the way his lips felt against yours. You found yourself glancing up at him often, his face illuminated by the soft moonlight peeking through your blinds – only to see him staring at the ceiling, his thumb rubbing soothing circles into your shoulder and you can feel the way his mind just empties as he glances down at you with the softest smile known to man.

"Sleepy?"

Your nod was false, but you didn't care – not when he sighed softly and pulled you into his chest with a mumbled good night.

"Goodnight, Hao."

As for moving on, Minghao wasn't sure he could, either. Not when he woke up in your bed the next morning, surrounded by your scent and your limbs and your skin stuck to his in a way that made him ache confusedly. Not when he was wearing a pair of flannel pajamas he never got back after that first time you stayed over at his apartment. Not when you were already awake, your eyes glued to the soft scar on his eyebrow before you noticed he was awake.

"Hey." "Hey, sweetheart."

Not when he watched you cook something light for lunch for the both of you, in his shirt that you have not returned since that night at his place. Not when you smiled at him with a glint of embarrassment in your eyes, but just barely hidden by comfort, trust, love.

Not when he felt his heart start racing in his chest as he said he'd see you later before he left, swinging his keys in his hand as you leaned up and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek.

"See you, Hao."

Yeah. Minghao doesn't think he can move on.

FOUR MONTHS AGO…

You and Minghao moved in as the summer grew hotter, the July air sticky as you bickered over whose couch was going to be shoved into the living room. Minghao lost the game of rock-paper-scissors, and his lip curled into a frown as Mingyu came with Tzuyu to haul his couch back to their apartment.

"And you haven't fucked on this, right?" Mingyu asked as he and Minghao took the cushions and tied them together, you and Tzuyu snorting over the jar of lemonade you were preparing. 

You and Tzuyu had become quick friends after you graduated. She helped Mingyu and Wonwoo plan the grand idea of throwing both you and Minghao a small celebration at Seungcheol and Jeonghan's house, inviting the entire staff and other straggling friends. The couple hadn't been too happy about how trashed everyone got and how you accidentally broke one of their lamps, but they congratulated you and Minghao on your graduations and gifted you both an expensive bottle of wine. Wine that you both shared when you got the keys to your shared apartment, tucked away in a cooler full of ice while you both tackled the deep cleaning of the new space. He took the front, and you took the bedrooms and bathrooms. You both emerged sweaty and sticky, grimacing at each other as you settled into Minghao's car on the way to buy paint for the bedrooms and wallpaper.

Neither of you have spoken about that night on your couch. Not that you had to – nothing more came of it. The two of you continued to work together in harmony, you hung out regularly, you flirted with customers – and you ignored the churn of subtle jealousy in your stomach when a customer got any sort of extra attention from him.

You ignored the skip in your heartbeat when his fingers grazed yours in handing you a drink, you ignored the way your stomach flipped during the many times he offered to tie your hair up when it got in the way. You especially ignored the whispers of your coworkers, ones that had only heightened since the party at your Seungcheol and Jeonghan's house – where Minghao was constantly checking in on you, bringing you drinks and adjusting your dress or hair.

So much so that when the party was over and it was just Seungcheol, Jeonghan, you and Minghao – Jeonghan asked. He asked if the two of you were a thing, and Minghao promptly peered over his highball at you. You just shrugged, the words stuck in your throat as Seungcheol shared a glance with Jeonghan.

They then did the diabolical, classic meddling-manager thing: they scheduled ALL of your shifts together.

It then seemed like the entire universe was forcing the proximity – because your car finally kicked the bucket. It would not turn on, not even after you begged Chan at the mechanic shop to give it a good knock on the hood. Because of this, you were now rendered carless – not that it mattered, because your new roommate had a car. Your new roommate, that was also your friend, coworker, and suspected partner by the married couple that owned the restaurant the two of you worked at. Minghao drove the two of you to work every day, his car once parked in front of your old apartment now sitting pretty in front of your shared one. It was domestic, how he slid in front of your apartment and still got out and knocked on your door to let you know he'd arrived – instead of just the regular I'm here text or, your least favorite, the honk. He opened your door, he let you choose the music, he rolled the windows down because you loved the free feeling of the breeze in your hair before you were ultimately forced to go into work-mode in order to withstand the berating of customers and the soreness in your feet.

Upon moving into the apartment, the two of you furnished it by splitting your belongings. Your walnut bookcases, his mahogany dining table. His Persian rugs, his television, his plants, his plates and cups. Your wall decorations, your handmade vases, your choice of wallpaper in the bathroom, your silverware.

His pots. Your pans. His blankets on the couch. Your couch.

"No, Mingyu. I have not had sex on this couch." Minghao scoffed, before peering over his shoulder at you and Tzuyu with a look on his face that reads: Can you believe this guy? You only shrug, biting back a smile as you slip ice cubes into the pitcher, facing Tzuyu. She's already looking at you, and she waits until you tilt your head in curiosity before she whispers.

"How long have you two been a thing?"

You almost choked on your spit. Her eyes were wide as she patted your back, giving a thumbs up to the worried men looking over their shoulders, pausing their unscrewing of the legs off the couch.

"What? Minghao and I are not a thing, Tzu." "Could've fooled me. I've known Minghao for years, and he's never even introduced us to a girlfriend of his. He's so private that way." She murmured, adding a few sprigs of mint into the glass pitcher. 

You glanced over at Minghao, who was listening to Mingyu talk about how Wonwoo got into a scuffle with Seungcheol over the missed truck order at work – when he shivered, his gaze flicking up to you. He gave you a quizzical look, before turning back to Mingyu and acting as if he was paying attention.

"I don't think Hao and I will ever be anything more than good friends. And, well, roommates now. This is genuinely one of the more refreshing friendships I've ever been in. There's zero expectations to be perfect or act like I care about the smalltalk that usually precedes friendships." You shrugged, taking a wooden spoon and stirring the lemonade. You weren't lying, per say. You definitely did not think things would advance between you and Minghao – he was far too…well he was…you know. Ugh!

Minghao was literally fucking perfect. That was the issue. He was perfect, from the careful styling of his hair to the way you'd walk into his bedroom to see him slathering lotion on his arms after a warm shower. And he wasn't just perfect physically, he would not have that mercy upon you – he was perfect on the INSIDE, too.

You'd only been living together for a few weeks at this point – but he'd kept the space clean, far cleaner than you had gotten yourself used to. Your bedroom was already a mess, clothes strewn everywhere, and you'd tripped over an unpacked box several times before kicking it to the side. But Minghao's? Pristine. Everything in its designated spot, his vanity clear of debris and a special spot for his skincare items. He kept a pitcher of water on his nightstand at most, the cup always half filled. His bed was always made neatly, his clothes tucked into his dresser and closet with the utmost care. At most, he'd have his closet door open or have a random jacket thrown over his desk chair – but he was your stark opposite.

"I don't know about that one, Y/N. I think this could be something good, but what do I know?" Tzuyu shrugged, grabbing the tray of glasses and tilting her head for you to grab the pitcher. You wanted to ask her what she meant, what she knew, but you didn't get a chance as Mingyu and Minghao carried the corpse of his stripped couch outside. You held the doorway open more, giving Minghao a quick nod as he wormed past you.

You tried not to look at the flexing of his shoulders beneath the black tank top he donned, squeezing your eyes shut and looking away when you heard Tzuyu snort. You peeled an eye open to see her smirking at you, shaking her head as she set the glasses down on your coffee table. You scowled, setting the pitcher down on the doily and laying on the floor next to the table, grabbing the remote for the television.

The coffee table was the only thing you and Minghao couldn't agree on, and decided to buy it at a thrift store. The one hint of togetherness thus far – as if the mixed aesthetics and belongings weren't enough. It made you laugh a bit, because you knew if and when you moved out, what would be taken with you.

It's like the coffee table is the dog that a couple gets before they split up. Who gets it?

"Y/N, can I see you in the kitchen?" Minghao's voice snapped you out of your thoughts, and you gave Tzuyu a pained look as you slipped the remote in her hand. Minghao had slipped into the kitchen already as you stood, quickly trekking the living room and sliding in on your socks. He grabbed his keys off the counter, having left them there earlier when he arrived with groceries, before Tzuyu and Mingyu came over for his couch.

"I'm going to help Mingyu get the couch set up at his place, we should be back before dinner. Do you want to order something in and we can pick it up on the way back? My treat." Minghao spoke with his back turned to you as he rummaged through the fruit bowl, before you heard the unmistakable crunch of an apple being bitten into. He looked over his shoulder, and you saw him holding said apple between his teeth, a jump of his brows prompting you to speak.

"You'll be a while though, won't you?"

"I'd never make you wait, Y/N. So? Think about what you want, and text me." He shrugged, ruffling your hair as you swatted his hand away, grabbing his wrist.

"Aren't they staying for dinner? Shouldn't this be a group decision?"

He only used your leverage on his wrist to pull you closer, leaning against the counter and wrapping his arm around your waist. Your eyes widened at the sudden proximity, and you felt your cheeks heat as he peered down at you through his lashes. He smiled at you, eyes searching your face before he clicked his tongue.

"Just tell me what you want, honey. I'll get it done."

He pressed a kiss to your hairline, smoothing your hair down before slipping out of the kitchen. You heard his gentle goodbye to Tzuyu, who hummed in response before the click of the door made his departure evident. Peeking out of the kitchen, you saw Tzuyu smirking to herself, shaking her head as she took a sip of her lemonade.

"C'mon, Y/N. You know you wanna tell me."

Her voice was sing-song, and you groaned inwardly as you walked out of the kitchen and flopped over the back of the couch. You flipped onto the cushions, landing on your back with a grunt from your lips as you draped your arm over your eyes.

"Tzu, nothing is happening between him and I. He is genuinely just my friend. Roommate. Coworker."

She didn't buy it. You could tell by the quirk in her brows and the pointed look in her eyes. She tapped the coffee table with the edge of her glass, swirling the ice before speaking.

"And soon he'll be your boyfriend, fiancé, husband. I have a hunch about these things, Y/N. I know love when I see it."

You only rolled your eyes, snatching the remote back off the coffee table. "Yeah, sure. What do you want to watch? And what do you want for dinner? Hao said they'd bring something back." Tzuyu didn’t push it as the two of you ended up settling on a random episode of Gilmore Girls. You mumbled at each other as you began to pass your phone between the two of you, looking at local restaurants when you heard a ding – a ding specifically applied to Minghao's contact.

"Nothing happening, huh?" Tzuyu wiggled your phone between her fingers, a notification from Minghao up top.

Msg From: Xu Minghao [5:43PM] sweetheart, did you figure out what you want for dinner? [5:43PM] we're almost done over here

You scowled, snatching your phone back as she giggled. "Sweetheart? I don't call my friends that." She teased, and you sighed. "Tzu, can we please drop it?" Your voice is unrecognizable to yourself, ridden with an oddly placed insecurity and Tzuyu's eyes widen slightly before she clears her throat. She nods, tapping the edge of her glass against the table again and looking down at your phone.

Msg From: Xu Minghao [5:45PM] quickly, please. [5:45PM] y/n i can see you reading these!

"I'll drop it for now, but please think about my words. I know it may be hard to believe, but I do think there is more to this than meets the eye. And…I support you, on whatever route you end up taking, in whatever way you end or begin this relationship." You couldn't lie to yourself, her words stuck with you for the rest of the evening. They rang in your head when the pair of men arrived with stacked plates of takeout, and they rang in your head as Minghao served your plate and forbade you from getting up for anything. They rang in your head as you and Mingyu washed the dishes, noting how Mingyu only referred to you by your name in your hushed conversation about you inviting them to stay for a movie.

Not like Minghao, who had even greeted you with a pet name.

They rang in your head as Tzuyu and Mingyu cuddled in the corner seat of your couch during the movie, your chest slightly pained as you noticed the cushion-sized distance between your thigh and Minghao's. They rang in your head every time you noticed Mingyu's lips on his girlfriend's hairline, on her cheek, on her lips…

They rang in your head as you thought back to the night of your graduation, how Minghao's lips kissed you just as gently, but in a way that made you think about it every waking moment of every day. In a way that made you glance at him from across the restaurant when Jeonghan was trying to get your attention to finish your tip-out; in a way that made you remain silent during the rides to and from work by his side.

In a way that made you touch yourself at night, thinking about him, about his hands on your body. So warm, so confident, so caring.

So loving.

"Good night, you two. Drive safe." You stood with your hands in your pockets, your shorts allowing the cool evening breeze to graze your legs. Tzuyu gave you a warm hug as Mingyu opened the door of his old pickup, her lips barely touching the shell of your ear as she whispered.

"Think about it." They drove off within the next five minutes, with you and Minghao standing next to each other in front of your apartment door, waving them off. You glanced up at him, a faint heat coating your cheeks as his hand ghosted over the small of your back, hearing the jingle of his keys being hooked onto your belt loop. You jolted at the weight, swatting him away as he snickered.

"Want to take a walk? The weather feels great."

You hated the way you agreed so quickly, tugging slightly at the neck of your t-shirt, too tight around your throat as your arms brushed. He stood on the side closest to the street, his hands tucked into the pockets of his sweatpants as he hummed.

"I got a letter back from the graduate program I applied to. I was waitlisted, so I think I'm going to withdraw and reapply next year. Gives me a chance to save some money, take out less loans." He grimaced, looking up at the darkened sky. You frowned, crossing your arms across your chest.

"I didn't get into mine, if it makes you feel better. I think I'm going to be taking a gap year, so much for being a therapist and letting my parents down yet again. Did I tell you that they told me I wouldn't even be a real doctor? Unbelievable." You sneered, and he shook his head.

"No, that doesn't make me feel better. You deserved to get in. I read your application essay, remember? You're brilliant. I could never imagine being on a board of admissions and not allowing someone with such a passion into my program." He scoffed, and you only snorted. 

"Passion, huh? Shit load of good it does me." You shook your head, kicking a bit of gravel as you made it to the corner of your block. You sucked your teeth as Minghao's arm wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you into his side slightly. "You'll have to admit that you're a good person with goals and dreams like everyone else at some point, you know? You've got a big heart, and you want to help the world. It takes a passionate person, a dedicated person, to work in therapy. Do you know how hard it is to sit and listen to people's problems all day and not bring them home with you?" "Bartenders are the therapists of the food and beverage industry, aren't they?" You teased, snickering as he lightly smacked his fingers against your shoulder. "Sorry, sorry." "But you're right, in a way. I do commend you, though, an incredible amount. And your parents…they don't realize what kind of person their daughter is. You're bright. You're kind. You're beautiful in ways I can't even begin to describe, and that doesn't even begin to cover your looks. So let's just…not think about their opinions. You're independent and strong, and I'm always rooting for you." His voice was soothing as he traced circles into your skin, the moonlight illuminating your path as you walked in lockstep with him. You sighed, "So what happens now? We just work our butts off at the restaurant and save our pennies?" "What better to do? We can even set up a little fund to take the odd weekend trip, if you'd like. Roommates do that, right?" He sounded quizzical, and you glanced up to see him already looking at you. Those eyes…

"Well, friends do that, don't they? We're friends before we're roommates." You tried, and he let out a scuff of a laugh, nodding. "Yeah, sweetheart. Friends."

You didn't understand why it pained you to hear him confirm what you already knew, but the stupid pet name sprinkled in definitely made the pang in your chest deeper than you'd expected. His hand was on your shoulder, ringed fingers now dangling over the edge and your eyes glued to the ground. You kicked gravel and dirt as the two of you walked, your tennis shoes scuffed from weeks of moving and roughhousing with furniture.

You were almost in front of your apartment when Minghao made a noise of eureka, his fingers squeezing your shoulder lightly as he spoke.

"Oh, I forgot to mention this earlier, but Jeonghan is asking me to take a few doubles these coming weeks because Seungkwan is going on vacation. They know that we carpool, so I should be able to swing by and bring you to work anyway, but I figured I'd let you know I'll be out of the house for most of the morning." 

You groaned, running your hand through your hair as you nodded.

"Yeah, Cheol talked to me about taking a bunch of morning shifts because Hansol is also going on vacation. I'm not bothered but…" You gave Minghao a wiggle of your brows, making him snort.

"You think they're going together? Romantic getaway…" He swayed you gently, and you snickered to yourself.

"Kiss, kiss, fall in love…sharing appetizers…" You chided as the two of you reached your door. Minghao unhooked his keys from your belt loop, unlocking the door as he shook his head.

"They do that eye-flirting thing, you know? Lots of shared looks, soft whispers and stuff. It's cute, they're a cute pair." He nodded, pushing the door open and allowing you in before he stepped in behind you. You hummed in response, beelining for the empty bags of movie snacks on the coffee table, crumpling them in your hands as you moved around. Minghao joined you, folding the blankets that had been thrown over Mingyu and Tzuyu's laps as well as your shoulders.

Neither of you spoke as you cleaned up the living room, the ending credits of the movie still playing as you stretched your arms over your head, holding the trash in your fists as you walked to the kitchen. You could hear Minghao continue to rustle around, the television turning off and the soft creak of the floorboards grabbing your attention as he skirted into the kitchen. "I'm going to be up early tomorrow, so I'm going to shower first. Is that okay with you?" He moved you away from the trash can, letting you lean on the counter as he took the lid off and grabbed the drawstrings of the bag. You nodded before realizing he couldn't see you and cleared your throat.

"Yeah, sure. That's fine; I have to fix up my bed and stuff in my bedroom. Take your time." You shrugged, watching the muscles in his arms flex as he pulled the trash bag out, tying the plastic drawstrings into a knot before fishing another one out of the box on top of the fridge.

"Are you settling in well? I haven't checked in about it. I know it's quite the drastic change to go from living alone to someone in your space all the time." He sounded sympathetic, but you only shrugged again.

"It's like freshman year of college again. Except this time, I actually like my roommate because you're not kicking me out at odd hours of the night to bang your boyfriend." You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms. He nodded, biting back a smile when you elbowed him lightly, making him snort.

"I'd never do that. No need to worry about it, pretty." He placed the lid back on the trash can, lifting up the bag and skirting around you. "I'll be back in a second."

Said second turned into ten minutes. Ten full minutes where you rubbed your face in an attempt to bring back a touch of reality, something that would take the attention your mind loved to devote to pet names and affections from your roommate, your friend, your coworker, away.

They say your living space is a reflection of your state of mind. As you wormed your way through stacks of unpacked boxes, clothes strewn on the floor, old textbooks gathering dust in the corners of your room – you kind of agreed.. You grimaced, opting to kick everything out of the way and grabbing a box cutter off your desk and slicing through one of the boxes stacked by your closet. You reached to your desk, flicking the lamp on to see the contents of the heavily packed box.

It opened to photo albums and framed pictures, and you closed your eyes as your hands touched the familiar red leather of your family album. Photos gathered in the tens of you and your parents – at your favorite park in your hometown, at dozens of restaurants where you celebrated birthdays, your parents' anniversary…

A celebration of a perfect report card, time and time again before the 180 spin came, and your parents realized you were leaving your hometown for something bigger. A huge, fancy school in the middle of a metropolitan city, studying Psychology when your mother had pushed for Law or Accounting. Acting like you'd betrayed her trust – and as Mother says, Father does. He too, pushed you aside and acted like you'd scorned him. 

Neither of your parents were lawyers or accountants. They were both high school mathematics teachers, your father in statistics and your mother in economics. Neither of them had a passion for law or accounting – and they both knew of your interest in the medical field, in psychology and the brain.

You found it odd that the success that follows the title of 'Doctor' was not enough for them. That, paired with the rejection letter from your Masters' program, you felt like there wasn't any lower you could get. "Penny for your thoughts?" Minghao's voice was soft, but it still made you jolt and drop the album. You held a hand to your chest, before shaking your head.

"Nah. I'm good. Sorry, uh, about the mess." You gestured to the room, and he only shook his head, his fingers brushing his hair out of his eyes as he looked around a bit. He leaned on your doorway, the hallway light only making your eyes trial his gentle frame.

"Your space, sweetheart. You do what you want with it. I'm going to shower now. Anything you need before I start turning in?"

You shook your head, tapping the leatherbound photo album before smiling pitifully.

"I'm good. Good night, Hao." You expected him to slink away, focusing your thoughts back on the album. You flipped through it, thumbing at photos of you in frilly dresses and Halloween costumes your mother would stitch by hand.

"You can talk to me. You know that, right?" Minghao's voice was right next to your ear, his breath tickling the back of your neck. His hand was wrapped around the edge of your desk to keep himself steady, and your face was a bit too close to his as you turned to face him. He was illuminated slightly by the yellow light of your desk lamp, his eyes scanning your features.

"I know. I just…I know." You pursed your lips, casting your eyes back to the album in your hands. "I'll let you know if I ever need to…I don't know. Let off steam, I guess." Your laugh was soft and pathetic, and he hummed, before you felt his hand tuck a stray curl behind your ear. You glanced up at him, only to see him looking at you fondly. "Let off steam, huh?" "Shut up." "As you wish. Good night." He grinned, pushing off your desk and making his way out of your bedroom. 

You spent the next few hours listening to Minghao tinker around in the bathroom before the sounds move to his bedroom, your focus on unpacking the albums onto the bookcase tucked into the corner of your room. You picked clothing up off the floor, tossing the articles into the hamper and you forced yourself to organize your every thought when you heard it. You heard the soft sigh through the wall, and the groan from his throat as his back hit the mattress.

You screwed your eyes shut and grabbed your headphones from the nightstand, plugging them into your phone as quickly as you could before you could hear anything else. You took a deep breath, out through your mouth as the beginning notes of Runnin' by The Pharcyde filled your ears.

So much for good night.

TWO MONTHS AGO…

"I'm so fucking tired, I could keel over right now." Your forehead rested on the back of your hand, which held the ratty broom you used to beat Seungcheol out of a chair only moments earlier. Said man was now sulking behind the bar with Minghao, being comforted by the bartender with a fruity cocktail.

"Don't sulk, she's just doing her job." Minghao patted him on the back as the older man frowned, wrapping his pouty lips around the swirly straw stuck in the mango daiquiri. You glanced over your shoulder at Jeonghan, who was only shaking his head as he clicked away on the calculator with your tips surrounding him in neat piles.

"Honey, unless you want to sweep for Y/N–" Jeonghan started, flipping a pen through his fingers as Seungcheol shook his head, taking his drink off the bar and making his way across the restaurant. "Nope! I'll be in the office."

You snickered to yourself as you saw Jeonghan watch him walk away, eyes low and full of nothing but love. He rolled his eyes, drawing his attention back to the money on the table as Tzuyu slid into a barstool with her cheek in her hand. Minghao leaned over, waving his fingers in her face.

"Why so glum, Tzu?"

He stopped wiping the counter down to listen to her as you skirted your way over to Jeonghan, pulling the chair beside him out and slumping down into it. Jeonghan doesn't look up from the calculator, his fingers gingerly thumbing through the dollar bills when you make a noise of curiosity.

"Yes, Y/N? How can I help you?"

"How long have you and Mr. Choi been together?" You asked gently, watching Jeonghan bite back a smirk. He shakes his head, tilting it to the side before meeting your eyes.

"You don't have to call him Mr. Choi, Y/N. You can just call him Cheol."

"Fine. How long have you been with Cheol, Mr. Yoon?" You smiled cheekily, earning a scoff as Jeonghan flicked your forehead softly. "Jeonghan, answer the question!"

"We dated for three years before we got engaged. Then we were engaged for two years before we got married, and we got married two years ago. Seven years together and counting, unless you also involve how long he made me court him." Jeonghan's blush doesn't go unnoticed as he runs a hand through his hair, and you cooed.

"How did you guys meet?" Jeonghan snorts, tonguing his cheek before sighing and thumbing through another stack of bills.

"Any particular reason as to why you've got so many queries tonight, Y/N? You've been working here for almost a year and you've never cared before." His brow is quirked as you hear the heavy office door open across the restaurant, a flushed Seungcheol ducking into the kitchen with his empty cup. Jeonghan sends him a wink, making the older man shake his head in disbelief.

"I just think you guys are cute. You don't see many couples around here, the dating pool has gotten so icky." You scoffed, twirling the broom handle in your hand as Jeonghan hums in agreement.

"I've known Seungcheol since we were kids. We drifted after middle school because I wound up moving across the city, and we lost contact. We met up again here, in this restaurant, right before we were set to graduate college. Funny, really." Jeonghan smiled inwardly, watching as you leaned in slightly.

"You guys worked here together?"

"Yup. He was a bartender, I was a waiter." Jeonghan gave you a pointed look, before his eyes flickered to Minghao. The man was talking to frowning Tzuyu, his brows furrowed as he whispered what you assume to be his opinion on her dilemmas. "Cheol was actually really shy, believe it or not. He's not the big Rottweiler type, despite his physique. More like…a feisty barn cat." "So…you chased him? For how long?" You watched as Mingyu and Seungcheol walked out of the kitchen with their arms crossed, seemingly discussing something serious. Seungcheol's jaw was tight, and Mingyu's shoulders were full of stress as he draped his apron over one of them. Seungcheol glanced over at Jeonghan, a sympathetic look in his eye as he tilted his head in the direction of the office.

"For all three years that we worked here. And I continue to do it, he likes it." Jeonghan nodded, gathering your tips for you and snapping them together in a blue rubber band. He held them out to you, gathering his belongings in his other hand as you took it. "Of course, not every couple that gets together here, stays together. These walls have seen many of my fights with Cheol, and vice versa. There's no limit. Exhibit A." Jeonghan gestured to Tzuyu, who was angrily typing on her phone while Mingyu held back tears as he muttered back and forth with Seungcheol. Sighing, Jeonghan ruffled your hair before skirting away and meeting Seungcheol and Mingyu in the office. You stood, leaning your weight on the broom before feeling eyes on you.

Minghao was staring right at you, before his eyes flickered to Tzuyu. You grimaced, stuffing your tips in your back pocket before sliding up to the bar.

"So…what's got you so upset?"

"Mingyu." As it turns out, maybe the restaurant owner knew far more than he let on. Mingyu and Tzuyu had gotten into an argument while she helped him with dishes – about work. The two of them were stressed, knowing that they usually made rent with their hefty amount of hours at the restaurant – however, it left little time in the week for each other. Mingyu being the best cook of the three that worked at the restaurant made things even harder, seeing as he was constantly being called in if Seungcheol or Jeonghan weren't able to fill in.

It left Tzuyu feeling pushed aside, but Mingyu could argue the same. The last three hostesses that had been hired had to be let go due to their attendance inconsistencies, leaving Tzuyu to rush to work at the last minute. It created a small rift in their relationship, and Tzuyu finally gave the ultimatum: work or her. Mingyu hadn't replied.

No choice is a choice, a silent one. 

And usually, the wrong one.

"I'm sorry." You murmured, smoothing her long hair with your hand as she slumped against the bar.

"Why? If anything, I feel like we should be able to work through this. We should be able to find time for each other even with our busy schedules. You and Minghao can do it, why can't we?" She groaned, resting her forehead against the cold bar. You sighed, running your fingers through her hair when the office door opened again – Mingyu was sitting at the desk and frustratedly wiping his face as Jeonghan called for Tzuyu softly.

"Go. We'll wait here." Minghao assured her, crossing his arms on the bar as you nodded in agreement. She took a deep breath, trekking the restaurant quickly and ducking into the office as Jeonghan shut the door.

"What does she mean, you and I can do it?" You questioned, reaching into your back pocket and separating the bundle of bills that would go into Minghao's wallet. He shrugged and smiled softly, wiggling his fingers as you held the wad of cash out to him.

"It means we work well together. Don't you think we make a good pair?" Minghao raised his eyebrows at you, making you roll your eyes as you continued to sweep aimlessly around the bar. 

"I guess so. Hey, your birthday is coming up soon, right?" You crouched to get the swept trash onto the handheld dustpan, watching as Minghao shrugged again and turned to the cooler. He opened it, taking out your can of orange juice before speaking again.

"Hardly. It's barely September, my birthday isn't for another two months." He shook his head, and you scoffed as you made your way to the trash can. You dump the contents of the dustpan before glancing up at him with a suspicious look in your eye.

"Don't tell me you're one of those people that works on their birthdays, are you?" The way he tongues his cheek is enough of an answer for you, making you shake your head as you replace the broom and dustpan behind the bar. You skirt around him to the sink, washing your hands as you click your tongue. "That's not happening this year. We have to celebrate." "Like hell it's not. I make the most tips on my birthday, Y/N." He grabbed his jacket from the hook behind him, shrugging it over his shoulders as you dried your hands. "Plus, Jeonghan knows I won't take no for an answer when it comes to working on my birthday. I'll be here from five to closing."

You rolled your eyes again, before feeling his arm snake around your waist. It'd been almost a year of this – soft, casual touching, hushed praises, kisses to the forehead…

It was all so intimate. Nothing he did felt like friendship anymore, but you weren't complaining.

"Why do you care so much, anyway? You want to celebrate with me?" "Obviously, jackass. You're my best friend." You swatted him away, only to be pulled closer into his chest. You groaned, your hands splayed across his chest as he smiled down at you.

"What an upgrade, should I be honored?" You scoffed, pushing him a bit but he didn't budge. For a second, you think he glances at your lips.

"Tell you what, pretty. I'll work my shift, and we can celebrate after. Just you and me." His hand squeezed your side gently, his eyes expectant of something – but you know you could say nothing and he'd still understand. He once told you that he thinks humans misunderstand almost everything…

And sometimes it is better to observe, and listen – than speak.

"Get away from me before I twist your nipple off." You spoke through gritted teeth, only making him get slightly closer to your face. His lips nearly brushed your nose, and you narrowed your eyes as you pushed his jacket out of the way. He jerked away, crossing his arms over his chest and feigning a shocked look as you grinned.

"I cannot believe you'd hurt me! Wow, some best friend you are!"

"Are you always this dramatic?" You teased, sticking your tongue out at him as you skirted back out from behind the bar. He turned his nose up at you, waving you off with his hand. Your eyes darted to the maroon gel manicure you'd given him earlier that day, and you bite back your grin before taking your can of orange juice off the bar.

"Let's go, yeah? I'm tired." You pouted, shaking the can gently before tilting your head towards the front door. He huffed, tightening his jacket around his body as he sauntered out from behind the bar – nearly tripping when the sound of the office door being slammed against the brick of the walls startled you.

Tzuyu stormed out, her red coat held in her hand as she ducked her head down. Presumably to hide a face full of tears, covered by the swing of her caramel hair.

You looked back at Minghao, his eyes worried as he watched her slip out the front door. Mingyu appeared as the door nearly shut, with Jeonghan and Seungcheol holding guilt in their eyes. "I'm sorry, Mingyu. If we had known–" "You couldn't have. It's fine. I'll figure it out." Mingyu looked defeated, and you elbowed Minghao lightly as he sidled up next to you. "Drive Tzuyu home." You muttered, tucking your orange juice in your shirt pocket as Minghao swung his keys.

"Divide and conquer, huh? I'll see you at home, pretty." Minghao ruffled your hair, before quickly pressing a light kiss to your hairline. "Be safe, okay?"

He was gone before you could say anything.

You sighed to yourself, seeing the three men in the office watching Minghao slink out without you. Jeonghan looked around Mingyu's frame, his brow raised as you winked, cracking open your orange juice and walking towards them.

"Gentlemen. It appears my chauffeur has taken his leave without letting me know." You shrugged, and Mingyu sighed as you held your hand out. The friendship between the two of you had grown exponentially during the last few months, and you found yourself gossiping with him in the kitchen if Minghao was busy or Tzuyu wasn't at her podium.

He handed his keys over without a word, Seungcheol's eyes full of guilt as he patted the younger man's shoulder. "We'll see you next week, Gyu." You didn't bother with goodbyes, the married couple giving you curt nods as they followed behind you. Minghao's car was no longer in the parking lot, and you beelined for Mingyu's without a second thought. Seungcheol locked the front door of the restaurant, and you felt Jeonghan's eyes on your back as you climbed into the lifted pickup truck.

Mingyu was silent as you fiddled with his radio, cranking the ignition before sucking in a breath. "You wanna–"

"How do you and Minghao do it?"

You blinked, absently turning out of the parking lot and pulling off into the main road. "How do we…do what?"

Mingyu was frustrated, tossing his baseball cap onto the dash with a huff. He slumped in the passenger seat, crossing his arms over his chest before peering up at you through teary eyes.

"Work together and go home together without bringing any of the work problems with you. It's like we're constantly being pushed and pulled. If I'm not being called in, she is. I'm not saying it's a bad business decision by Jeonghan or Seungcheol, but she gets tired, too. I know she's great at her job, but she won't be here forever. Her potential is far greater than just greeting people who don't even deserve to be graced with her presence."

You hummed, fiddling with the turn signal.

"I wish I could help, Mingyu! However, Minghao and I–"

"Oh, come on. You're going to tell me you're just friends? That you haven't, even for a moment in time, though what it would be like to be together? You're saying that neither of you have ever gotten just entirely too close and almost kissed?" You felt your face grow hot as Mingyu sat up in his seat, leaning slightly over the center console as you slowed to a halt at a red light. You made the mistake of glancing over, seeing an expectant gaze on your friend's face. He watched intently as you rubbed your face in frustration, running your hands through your hair as you scoffed.

"Okay, fine. Minghao and I…there is truly nothing there, I can promise you that." You began, clearing your throat as you stared out the windshield to the fiery red light. Mingyu tilted his head, sort of like a puppy, as you squeezed your eyes shut momentarily. "Sometimes, I think we could be more. I don't like him, and he doesn't like me…but he certainly goes above and beyond for our friendship. I can say that for all of his friendships, though, because Minghao is just that kind of guy, you know? Kind, observant, sweet." "It confuses you." "This is supposed to be a therapy session for you, not me." Mingyu snorted, shaking his head. "Okay, fine. How do you and Minghao not fight?" "Because we're not together. We're friends, and we're roommates. We don't have that expectation of having to spend time together, because sometimes just brushing past one another when we're at work is enough. Sometimes waking up in the middle of the night to pee but having to wait because he's in the restroom is enough. Sometimes walking to the laundromat together is enough." You shrugged, before sighing. 

"When Hansol and Seungkwan were on vacation and we were pulling all those double shifts, he showed me that I could depend on him. He'd make breakfast before he left for work, and then come to pick me up for my shift. We did that for two weeks, and by the end of it, we were both exhausted. He never made me feel like I owed him anything, much less my time." You turned to face him, "You and Tzuyu have been together for three years. If you keep having the same fight, over the same thing. If the issue is that you don't spend enough time together, I think you should tackle that. Take a vacation, the restaurant won't burn down without you. Save your relationship." Mingyu sighed, running a hand through his hair before slumping once more. "I miss spending time with her. You know the last time we actually spent time together as a couple was when we went to pick up Minghao's couch? I don't think we've been able to even have a date night since."

You gaped, reaching over to smack his arm lightly. "Mingyu!" "I know, I know. God, and we were supposed to have a date night tomorrow, too, but Wonwoo is sick and Jihoon already asked for the night off." He rubbed his face in frustration, and the words slipped from your lips as you pulled into your apartment complex. "Call out. Minghao and I have the day off tomorrow, we can fill in." You blurted, and Mingyu scoffed. "Y/N, I couldn't ask you to do that." "You're not, I'm offering." You didn't let him continue to speak, instead turning his engine off and sliding out of his truck. Minghao and Tzuyu were sitting on your front steps, his jacket draped over her shoulders as she wiped her eyes. You felt the heat of Mingyu's body behind you, and Tzuyu didn't look up as you cleared your throat. Minghao glanced at you, his eyes heavy with expectation as you twitched your head in the direction of the apartment. "I lost my key."

You snorted, digging yours out of your pocket and shoving them into his hand. "Come in, we'll have a nightcap. Then you guys can go home and have a good night together, yeah?" Minghao seemed to understand as he opened the door and let the couple in. Tzuyu sat on the far end of your couch, and Mingyu didn't even bother sitting down – he beelined straight for your kitchen. You grabbed Minghao's arm lightly, pulling at his sleeve carefully and tilting your head towards his room. He nods, following behind you as you skirt into the pristine bedroom.

"I may have…fucked up." You start, making Minghao shake his head with a gentle smile. "Nah. I'm sure you said the same things I did. Spend time together, stop working so much, you and I are not together." He rolled his eyes as he tugged his jacket off, draping it over the back of his desk chair. His eyes scan your face, before his smile drops and his brows furrowed in concern. "What's wrong, honey?"

"I did…say all of that…" You grimaced, rubbing your neck sheepishly. "But I also…may have volunteered you and I to take their shifts tomorrow." "Y/N." He groaned, and you winced slightly, your hands coming to hold his. He allowed it, his eyes boring into yours as you tried to apologize.

"I know it was our only day off this week, Hao. I'm sorry, but I–" "You could've asked me first." He didn't sound mad, but disappointed. You felt like you were going to get scolded by your father. You shrank back a bit, and you could feel guilt spreading in your body as he sighed. You grimaced at the sting of tears filling your eyes, but bit them back.

"Are we doing rock-paper-scissors to see who takes what? Did you even call Jeonghan?" He moved his hands from yours, running one through his hair before crossing his arms. You shook your head in silence, and he squeezed his eyes shut for a brief moment before nodding. He held his hand out, yet another despondent sigh slipping from his lips. "Loser takes Mingyu's shift. Best out of three." "Minghao, I can just find someone else to do it. I'm sorry."

"Best. Out. Of. Three." You tongued your cheek, losing quickly to the tall man in front of you. Scissors, scissors, paper to his rock, rock, scissors.

"You're driving tomorrow." He muttered, rubbing his face with his hands before you nodded, looking anywhere but him and moving to slip out of his bedroom. He shook his head, standing in front of the door. "I'm not upset." "Okay." "Y/N." "What?"

His hands reach for your shoulders, and you kept your eyes casted elsewhere. His fingers are warm as they tilt your chin to look up at him, forcing you to try and blink back the tears when he rubs the pad of his thumb on your cheek. "I'm sorry for snapping. It wasn't my intention but I can tell I've hurt your feelings, and I never want to hurt your feelings." His voice was soft, and you felt your throat tighten slightly. You weren't too sure why you were even crying, maybe it was reminiscent of being scolded for trying to do the right thing.

"I'm sorry, honey." He murmurs, pressing a kiss to your forehead before pulling you into his chest. He smells like pink pepper and the essence of pomegranates, mixed with a hint of the maple butter rum one of the regulars likes to knock back. It's oddly comforting. "Forgive me." "It's fine. I should've asked." "Yes, you should have. However, that's not the point here."

Minghao pulled back slightly, pointing his finger in your face. You huffed, but he raised his brows at you – as if to say, listen. Be quiet.

"You need to call Jeonghan and let him know. If we're going to work tomorrow, I need to spend time with you tonight." You must've looked taken aback, because he only smiled. He pinched your cheek lightly, before humming and opening his door. "Go on, call him. We'll be in the living room." Either you'd been too out of it to fully process, or Jeonghan had truly had you on the phone explaining all your qualifications to run a kitchen as a head chef. You didn't have many, just the few nights you flipped burgers at a diner back in high school – but it seemed enough to settle Jeonghan. He let you know there was going to be a trainee chef with you named Joshua, as well as the kitchen manager named Seokmin.

Jeonghan also let you know that Tzuyu's shift started earlier than Mingyu's, so someone would have to go get you. He volunteered Seungcheol, and you could hear the man begin to protest in the background but he hung up before anything could be truly said.

You ducked out of Minghao's room to see him folding blankets in the living room, soft music playing on the television as he glanced up. He smiled, and you noticed the two cups on the coffee table. One tainted with lipstick from Tzuyu, and what seemed to be one filled with water? Soju? Rum? Something.

"Tzuyu is driving. She had some of your juice, I hope that's alright." He nodded, and you waved it off. You turned to the television, No One Noticed by The Marías playing softly as he hummed along. "Did Jeonghan say it was okay? I was trained to be a host and a waiter before I was a bartender, but you just jumped into waitressing, right?" "I had a part-time gig in high school at a diner. I have some, but not a lot." You shrugged, and he made an o-shape with his lips as he smoothed the folded blanket over the back of the couch. You nodded, before checking your watch. "It's only fifteen to eleven, do you wanna sit with me? Decompress a bit before we go to bed?" "Your version of decompressing is watching Bob's Burgers and sipping a beer." "We can sip something else, if that's the case." He rolled his eyes, biting back a smile as he nodded. "I have to change."

You both ended up returning to your respective rooms, and you hastily wiped your makeup off. Pajama shorts, your favorite baggy t-shirt that boasted of Bigfoot's existence…not the first thing you would wear to hang out but it's Minghao. You stared at yourself in the vanity mirror on your dresser, but heard your roommate knock on your door before your mind could wander too far about where all he could kiss you, in said stupid Bigfoot shirt.

"Are you taking a shower first tonight? Or are we going to fight for it again?" Minghao asked gently, and you shrugged.

"Go for it. I go in later than you do tomorrow, Tzuyu's shift starts at four." You wiggled your brows, and he scoffed, turning on his heel and beelining for the living room. You snickered to yourself, scampering after him as he flopped onto the couch. He draped an arm over his eyes, letting out a groan as you leaned over the back of it. "Want a beer, Mr. I don't drink?" He lifted his arm slightly, his eyes peering out at you from beneath it. "You drink like a fish, you know that?" "Is that a no?" "...Fine, I'll have a beer. Just one!" You cheered sarcastically, scurrying into the kitchen and grabbing two from the fridge. You peered at the bottle of Soju, mocking you from the shelf.

"Did you get lost in the fridge?" You heard Minghao call from the living room, making you scoff as you grabbed the bottle of Soju and tucked it under your arm. The piercing cold of the glass bottle made you shiver as you walked back into the living room. He was now skipping through movie recommendations on Netflix, his eyes darting back and forth across the screen.

"I said we could sip something else, I never said we'd be changing our entertainment of the night." You scoffed, sliding the drinks onto the coffee table as he smirked lazily. 

"You're right, honey." He flipped the remote in his hand, holding it out to you as you shook your head. You cracked open the beers, handing him one before perching on the edge of the couch in front of him. His stomach is warm against your lower back, and you try to ignore the way the blue light of the television makes his arms glow. 

Your eyes trailed up to his face, watching the way his tongue darted out to wet his lips before bringing the beer bottle to them. He continued to flip through suggestions, before you snapped out of your daze to hear him reading the summary to Ali Wong's Always Be My Maybe.

"...Feel the old sparks of attraction but struggle to adapt to each other's worlds. Interesting." He set his beer back on the coffee table. You snorted, "This is two hours long, Hao."

"You have somewhere to be?" He scoffed, pressing Play. You shook your head, feeling his hand tug at the back of your shirt, signaling for you to lean back. You did, resting your elbow on the back of the couch before reaching for the bottle of soju. "Can I have a sip?" You nodded silently, watching the two children on the television grow up to the sound of Young Americans by David Bowie. You held the uncapped bottle over to him, feeling his hand take it as Marcus' father let the now-teenagers know that tragedy had struck the Kim family. You felt your heart sink as the scene changed to something more somber, hearing Minghao hum to himself and mumble slightly. "This is sad as hell, it just started." You couldn't help but snort, taking the bottle back from him and taking a sip. You glanced over to see his ears slightly perked at the sound of D'Angelo's How Does It Feel, before his eyes met yours. "I'll bet you ten bucks they're going to kiss." "It's not a bet when you already know what the outcome is going to be." You scoffed, making him laugh softly. "See? They're already struggling to get in the backseat, I would've been out ten bucks if I took you up on that." "Call it gas money." He lightly pinched your side, making you jerk away from him. You swatted his hand away, sliding the bottle onto the coffee table with a scowl.

"First of all, I tried to give you gas money a few weeks ago and you cussed me out."

"I did not cuss you out! I merely asked what in the most significant fuck you thought you were doing."

"Oh, what a colorful way–" "Shut up before I tickle you." You huffed, feeling his fingertips dig into your side. He smiled up at you, gently squeezing the softness of your skin before patting it. "The point is, I'd never ask you for gas money. Let's be realistic." You nodded, struggling not to roll your eyes as he fully stopped paying attention to the movie, his head rested on his palm as Sasha cried in the walk-in fridge. "What happened with Mingyu? Tzuyu was a mess." "It's just odd to me that everyone thinks we're a thing? Mingyu asked me how you and I didn't bring home our work problems–"

"And you told him that we don't have that expectation of having to spend time together because we're not together. We're just friends." Minghao interrupted, his eyes serious as he spoke. You cleared your throat, nodding. "I don't agree with that." "Oh? You don't?" You felt your brows high on your forehead as you looked down at him, feeling his hand pat your back before he used it to run his fingers through his hair. "And why not?" "Because I like spending time with you. Why do you think I was upset earlier when you told me you volunteered us for the shifts?" "You said you weren't upset." "Sometimes people lie." "Oh, so you're a liar?" You leaned slightly closer, and he smirks. 

"While normally I'd apologize, I think I was right to do that. I was upset because now I don't get to spend the day with you tomorrow, and I lied because I didn't want you to cry. I don't like seeing you sad, it makes me sad." He shrugged, and you tongued your cheek.

"Romantic, aren't you?" You rolled your eyes, "My feelings are your feelings and your feelings are mine. All that jazz." "You don't have to brush off my affections as something romantic, you know. I can care about you openly and not have feelings for you in that way." "So you're saying you don't have romantic feelings for me?" "Never said that. I said I can." He lilted, reaching for his beer. You felt your cheeks grow hot as he sipped it, his eyes wide as he looked back over at you. "Woah, you would've thought I said I eat babies for a living. Are you okay?" "W-What did you and Tzuyu talk about?" You stuttered, making his brow quirk in confusion as he set his beer back down. 

"She asked me if you and I ever fight about work. I said no, because the beginning of our…friendship has always been this way. Too close for other people's comfort, very…advanced, in a way. We don't have spats over things that don't really matter, because work…it doesn't affect our dynamic." "Why did you hesitate before 'friendship?'"

"What?" "Before you said friendship. You paused. Why?" Minghao's eyes narrowed slightly, before he shrugged. "I paused when I said it with Tzuyu, as well. I guess…I don't know. I think back to what happened in your apartment, I take into consideration the way we speak to each other and kind of dance around the flame that could be something. I'm not saying it ever has to become a fire, the flame. But, it's definitely there." You felt your stomach flip slightly as you cleared your throat, reaching for your beer. You brought it to your lips, but didn't manage to take a sip before you sighed, putting it back down and tilting to face him. "We never talk about that night. Did you tell Tzuyu about it?" "No. That's not her business." He answered quickly, his eyes glancing at the television. Sasha and Marcus were now laying in bed together, staring at the ceiling. "I didn't think you'd be very fond of me telling her, either. I figured that if you didn't mention it while I helped Mingyu take the couch, it wasn't something you'd want shared." You shifted slightly, tucking your foot under your leg as you looked at him. “Do you think that is something we should share?”

“It’s not about my reputation though, is it? I don’t care what people think of me.” He shrugged, running his fingers through his hair once more. “But I care about what people say when it comes to you. I don’t like hearing others speak ill of you.”

“Would people knowing we almost slept together cause them to speak about me in a negative light?” You questioned, your hands fumbling for the bottle of soju. You offered it to him, and he took a small sip as he hummed.

“Maybe. Considering the fact that we are now roommates, and you constantly deny that there is anything between us.”

“As if you don't do the same.” “I don’t.”

“What?” Your eyes went wide as he held the bottle back out to you. You took it, bringing it to your lips as he shrugged.

“The customers like you, they think you’re sweet. The customers like me, and a few of them have asked if we’re a thing. I usually deflect…but I don’t think it’d be the worst thing in the world.”

“What? Us?” “Is there an us?”

You glanced at the television, the actors staring fondly at each other. They inch in for a kiss...two…

“Y/N.” “Sorry.”

Minghao was looking at you intently, his eyes searching your face as he moved your hair off your shoulder. “We don’t have to keep talking about this. It’s getting late.”

“Did you like it? The…uh, in my apartment?” You blurted, but Minghao showed no sign of surprise. In fact, he seemed to welcome the question, his eyes soft as he nodded.

"The kiss? Of course I did. I'm just not…used to it, I guess. I'm not a casual kind of guy. I was nervous, actually." He nodded, his thumb toying with the ring on his forefinger. You nodded carefully, fiddling with the spout of the soju bottle as you cleared your throat. "Nervous?" "Obviously. At that point, we were just starting to solidify our friendship. You had just gotten done with Jaehyun only a few months prior, and you literally signed the lease for this place that day. I was scared if we kept going, things would change. I enjoy your company, I enjoy your friendship…" He trailed off, clearing his throat as he seemingly shook off a feeling of something. "I didn't want things to go further if nothing was going to come from it, but more importantly, if it made you uncomfortable." "I wasn't uncomfortable. I just wasn't ready. I didn't want you to be a rebound. You deserved more." "You don't think I know what I deserve?" "I would hope that you do, and that you know it's not me. At least, not at that point in time." You muttered, hearing him scoff as he took the bottle of soju from your hand. "Hey!" "Is for horses. Are you hearing yourself right now?" He straightened up, carefully sitting up and adjusting himself to sit next to you. He folded his legs, and you did the same to face him fully. Your knees brushed his sweatpants, and you leaned back on your hands, toying with the seam of your couch cushion. "Are you?" "Minghao–"

"You're amazing, Y/N. Stop trying to put yourself down, or act like you're not someone who deserves everything. You're soft and sweet and one of the kindest people I've ever come across. You offered to work someone's shift on your day off, not because you want the money, no; because you want them to spend time together and help their relationship continue to flourish. You think anyone just does that?" He scoffed, and you cleared your throat, shrugging.

"It's not that serious." "Stop that! It is that serious, Y/N! You're so gentle and loving, and you are such a warm person to have around. The room practically lights up when you walk in, haven't you seen how excited the regulars at work get when they find out you're serving them? Haven't you seen how easily you make Seungcheol and Jeonghan laugh? Don't you understand how appreciated you are, even just within our friends and our coworkers? Are you that blind?"

He leaned forward, his hands settled on either side of your thighs as he spoke. "You have got to start recognizing that you're more than what you see. Other people don't matter, for the love of God, I promise they don't. You are so, so beautiful. I don't know how else to make you understand that."

"You don't need to make me understand anything. You're my friend." "What if I want more?" He murmured, and you felt your cheeks grow hot as you cleared your throat, your eyes darting around his face. His own were full of sincerity, dark with determination to understand you. 

You couldn't help the way you leaned closer, your heart thundering in your ears as he tilted his head. "Do you?" He inched closer, so close you could feel his breath on your lips. "Are you drunk?"

"No." "Tipsy?"  "No." He hummed, "We work tomorrow." "Minghao." "That's my name, pretty."

You scoffed, jutting your lip in a pout as he smiled. His hand was gentle as he brushed the hair away from your face, tucking a stray curl behind your ear. His thumb stopped at the lobe, tugging lightly at the diamond earrings he got you for graduation. "Nice earrings." "You would know, you got them for me." You mumbled, making him stifle a laugh as he nodded.

"I know. You always look so pretty when you wear them." He murmured back, and you scrunched your nose. "So you don't think I look pretty all the time?"

He smiled, his thumb lightly stroking your jaw as he moved away from you. "You said you'd shower first, I'll clean up here."

For whatever reason, you listened. You nodded in silence, your hand fumbling for the remote and turning the television off as he slid off the couch. He took the half-empty beer cans in his hands, offering holding the now-empty bottle of soju under his arm.

"Goodnight, Y/N. Rest well."

PRESENT – 3:15AM…

Minghao can't sleep.

His room is a mess, the door locked behind him as he shuffles through the piles of clothes on the floor. They say your room is a reflection of your state of mind, and it's true – he can't think, he can't sleep, hell…

He can't breathe without thinking of you. 

The two of you worked that shift for Mingyu and Tzuyu two months ago, and it was the worst shift of his life. He spent the entire time thinking about you, about the conversation you'd had the night before. Hoping you'd give him that longing glance you'd nailed perfectly in the time he'd known you, hoping he'd get to kiss you breathless and hoping you'd yearn for him the way he did you.

Instead, he shook it off. He stood at the host stand, greeting customers softly and seating them. He did his closing duties without even seeing a glimpse of you, until you walked out of the kitchen with a grin on your lips as you bid the trainee chef, Joshua, a goodnight.

He remembers the way your smile became something softer as he opened the passenger side door, how you let him buckle your seatbelt in for you and thanked him gently. He remembers how you offered to let him shower first as he peeled out of the parking lot, and how he scoffed and said you should go first. 

He remembers how you asked, again, what you would do for his birthday. He replied the same thing he had before – just you, and him. After his shift.

A shift he did not end up working, because you put in for him to have the day off and argued with Jeonghan until you were blue in the face. Minghao didn't know until the schedule was stapled onto the bulletin board the following week, his eyes almost instantly finding you across the kitchen. You had been eagerly talking to Seungcheol, making him laugh as you overanimated whatever story you'd told him.

He didn't say anything as the days went on, only quietly waited in his bedroom until you came in the morning of his birthday with breakfast on a TV tray. The two of you spent the entire day together and you initiated all contact – your arms wrapped around his waist from behind as he made lunch, resting your cheek on his bare back. You squeezed his sides, you cuddled him into the couch cushions as you watched Josee, the Tiger and the Fish. You made him dinner, you presented him with a few gifts and a new tea set he'd been eyeing for ages. 

You kissed his hairline, wishing him a happy birthday over a bottle of soju that he took two sips of. Two sips too much, as his lips ghosted over yours as you spoke to each other about nothing – too close, but he saw the way you held yourself back. He saw the way you wanted to kiss him, the way your hands clenched at your sides as you forced yourself to move away.

He wishes you would've kissed him.

His birthday had passed, you were nearing the end of November. This time last year, you'd asked him for a Guinness, with the most solemn look on your face.

This time last year, he drove you home for the first time and understood you'd be in his life, hopefully forever. He hadn't worked today, but dropped you off and picked you up – and you had a rough day. You talked about it – one of your regulars had a bad day and took it out on you, sending her food back three times and your tips had been nothing like what you usually made. You'd been snippy, and he prepped your shower for you, tossing a lavender steamer into it. You thanked him, and holed yourself away in your bedroom ten minutes to midnight.

He laid awake, thinking about you.

You'd long gone to bed, your soft breathing the only sound when he slid past your slightly opened door. You looked serene – your cheek squished against your pillow, soft lips gently puckered as you snuggled deeper into your sage green blanket. Your hair splayed all around, the moonlight seeping in through the drawn blinds and casting lines across your face.

He misses you, and you're no more than a ten-foot walk away. He wants to talk about his feelings, he wants to hold you close and he wants to stop losing his mind over how badly he wants you.

How badly he needs you.

He sighed as he looked around his room, the mess only digging into his very bones. He should've just spoken to you about his feelings all those weeks ago. He should've said yes, he did want more. He thinks about you romantically. He thinks about that night on your couch more times than he could count, tugging at his hair in frustration as he tries to bury the memories deep in the past.

He can't. He can't think about anything but you in that pretty white dress at his graduation party, talking to his parents with such ease. The relaxed state of your shoulders as you spoke to everyone with a gentle smile on your lips, the warmth in your laughter never leaving as you danced with him and Junhui. 

The way your eyes filled with something else as his parents asked you if there was something more between you and him, and his chest feeling tight when you insisted it wasn't the case. The way he could see the subtle disappointment in your face when he did the same…

He wants to understand you. He wants you to understand him, to observe him, to see him.

See him as more than just a friend, and he knows you do.

Whether it was a crush, or limerence…he doesn't care. He wants one chance at living life with you – coming home from work to sleep in the same bed and hold you close all night. To come home from a grueling shift and stand under the burning hot shower with you, feeling his muscles lose their tension with the heat and your gentle touch. To come home and make you a nice cocktail and a filling dinner. To come home and study with you, eventually. To come home and see you asleep on the couch, and getting to carry you to bed.

To come home, to you. Over and over again. 

"Fuck." He groans, slumping against his headboard and jolting at the cold of the wood against his shoulders. A sigh left his lips as he slid down slightly, tugging the duvet higher over his hips as he reached for his phone. He unlocked it, opening his gallery with a pout on his lips.

You, in your white dress at his graduation party. His mother took this photo – your hand had been on his chest, his high on your waist as you both smiled into the camera. Your lips had been reglossed, so pretty and glittery…

And your smile had been so bright, like the events earlier that day hadn't transpired. Like you hadn't pursed your lips together when calling your parents and getting sent straight to voicemail. Like you hadn't blinked back tears three times during lunch with him and Junhui, like he hadn't seen Junhui angrily calling your parents while you ducked into the ladies room after Minghao offered to foot the bill.

You had been truly at ease during that photo, much different than you had felt that entire day.

And he wants every single day to be like that for you – easy. Easy, with your independence but still letting him gently aid when he could see you needed it. Needed him. He wants to take you home and introduce you as his life partner, he wants to see you succeed in your dreams and have you by his side as he did the same.

He wants you to be happy.

"Minghao? Are you awake?" Your voice was heard before the soft raps of your fist against the door. He jumped, knocking his head on the wooden bedframe. His hand covers his mouth as he rubs the crown of his head, a hiss falling from his lips as he hears you mumble from the other side of the door. He locks his phone, tossing it onto the dresser as he slid out from under his duvet. He grabs a pair of sweatpants off the floor, grimacing to himself as he tugs them on before opening his door.

You look half awake, your hands clutching at the hem of your shirt. Your face is imprinted with the wrinkles from your pillowcase, often the way it looked when he would wake you up before work. The drawstring of your shorts was undone, but it had been tied when you went to bed. Maybe it got uncomfortable.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" You asked softly, and he shook his head. "Can't sleep. You okay? It's a mess in here, I'm sorry." He says sheepishly, rubbing his neck as you closed your eyes, shaking your head as you slipped past him. You settled on the edge of his bed, your eyelids heavy with sleep as you hummed. "You didn't make me feel bad about my mess. Something about it being my space, I remember. You said something about that when I said mine was messy. Don't worry about it." You sigh, peeling your eyes open to peer up at him. "I can't sleep." Minghao looked at the clock on his wall. 3:29AM.

"Would you like something warm? Or would you–" "Can you hold me?" You whispered it, almost too low for him to hear you. 

Over the course of your friendship, skinskip had been nothing new to either of you. He often pressed chaste kisses to your hairline, his thumbs stroking your cheeks, his arms wrapped around your shoulders when you'd slump against him after the end of a shift in the parking lot.

You were looking at him patiently, and he cleared his throat, nodding as he motioned for you to move back. You did so, scooting under his duvet with a frown on your face. He closed his door, perching on the side of his bed as you rested your head on one of his pillows.

He glances over his shoulder, seeing you peering up at him quietly before you speak. "Hit your head when I knocked, didn't you? I heard the bump." "Yeah. Your fault if I get amnesia, you know." He snorts, lying down next to you. His heart is racing a mile a minute as you held the duvet up for him to slide under, but he did so anyway. He turned on his side, propping himself up on his elbow as you turned to face him.

"Don't forget me." You murmur, your lip jutted out in a pout as he feels his cheeks grow warm. As if he could ever.

"Hold me, Hao. I'm cold." "Should've worn pants, pretty." He teases, making you scoff. You are so close to him, he can feel your breath on his chest as he scoots slightly closer. His fingers rake through your hair, your cheek warm to the touch as he pinches it. You scowl, shooing his hand away as you press your face into his neck. Your lips are feathering over his skin, and he squeezes his eyes shut as he feels your arm settle around his waist.

You tilted your head back, his eyes peeling open to look down at you.

"Something wrong, honey?" He spoke under his breath, and you blink up at him. Your eyes flitted around his face, and he felt a bit of worry settle in his stomach. He cradles your jaw in his hand gently, "Talk to me." "If I wanted there to be an 'us'...would you be okay with that?" 

Minghao feels the world stop. 

Your eyes are glued to his face with the softest glint of apprehension, your body still under the duvet as his thumb traced circles into your cheek. "You're tired. We can talk in the morning." He assures you, for whatever reason hoping that you'd let it go. Hoping that you were just speaking through your teeth, not truly enticing him to a conversation about his feelings.

Feelings that could ruin everything, even when he's sure you feel the same. You have to, right? Eyes don't lie.

Your eyes stayed on his face, unmoving as he peered down into them. Your lip is stuck in a pout, your own hand moving to push his hair out of his face. He fought the urge to sink into your touch, your voice giving him something to focus on.

"Not tired, Hao." You murmur, and he feels a bubble of laughter get caught in his throat as you hold back a yawn. He pressed his lips to your hairline, hearing you hum inwardly. Your brow furrows as you seemingly glare up at him, looking nothing short of an angry kitten.

"You confuse me, you know that?"

"Mmh, do I? I'm sorry, honey." He smiles, watching you tuck your arms into your chest and snuggling into his. He wraps his arm around your shoulders, letting your head rest on his bicep as you frown.

"You kiss me like it means nothing, and I want it to mean something." Your mumble was clear, and he glanced down at you to see you already staring up at him. "You call me pet names, and you get me earrings. You tell me I'm beautiful in ways you can't describe. You cared enough to find this place we call home. You say you want to make my life easier, you said you'd give your left arm for it." Your fingers pat the arm under your head, and he felt his lip twitch as he bit back a nervous smile. "I did say that." "So answer my question. Make things easier for me, Minghao." He sighs, twirling a piece of your hair in his fingers. "Ask me again." "If I wanted there to be an 'us'...would you be okay with that?" Your voice is far softer, and he breathes in steadily as he nods. "I would be more than okay with that. I think you know that already, though, don't you?" He spoke gently, feeling you nod gently against his arm. "Everything I do for you means something to me. The earrings, the kisses, finding this place we call home. I appreciate that, the fact that it's we and not just me, not just you. When you think about it, there has always been an us." "I want to stop lying in my bed and thinking about how empty it is. I haven't been able to sleep through the night since we shared mine the night of our graduations." You utter, your breathing shaky as you look up at him. Your eyes are glazed with unshed tears as he coos, thumbing at your cheek. "I think about you every single night, Minghao. I think about you when I think about my parents, and how they don't speak to me unless I reach out first. I think about you when I get ready for work, I think about you while I'm waiting for you to give me those god awful Budweiser Select 55s that Mrs. Choi loves."

He felt a tear slide onto his skin, hearing you sniffle slightly before you kept talking.

"I think about you when I have a bad day. I think about you when I'm off work and you're not, and how I wish you were with me. I think about you when I feel alone, because you're the only person aside from Junhui that has ever made me feel seen and understood. I think about you when the essence of Jaehyun crosses my mind, because I know that you'd never make me overthink my place in your life, but now you've got me wondering where we stand. I think about you, Minghao, every single second of my day. It's all so vague, in my mind. Knowing that you're only a few feet away, but you feel so far. Like someone I could never deserve, but I know that you are also just a man. There's no way I couldn't."

He hums, his thumb wiping softly under your eye as you let them flutter shut. 

"I think you're magnificent." He breathes, closing his eyes as he presses his forehead to yours. "I think you are the most thought-provoking person I've ever met. I know that…I know that you've only slowly allowed me into your life, quietly revealing parts of yourself and showing me that you trust me. From allowing me to meet Junhui, to letting me give you rides home, to living with me. You let me take care of you even though you are more stubborn than any mule in the countryside." He pulls back slightly, seeing your eyes closed and letting tears trickle out as you listen in silence. He feels his heart in his throat, "You've got the softest lips I've ever had the pleasure of kissing. You…the way you exist, knowing that there are certain odds against you and yet, you do it anyway. Your passion precedes any negativity anyone could ever cast upon you and I've never admired someone more to know that you are just a living, breathing, embodiment of passion and truth and hope."

Your eyes open slightly, bloodshot as his nose brushes yours lightly, his lips ghosting over yours as he speaks.

"You are a tumultuous flame and if I get burned, so be it. If I let the heat of your fire singe me to death, it wouldn't be a death in pain. I'd let it happen, over and over."

You nod, your sniffles are the only sound in the room for a moment.

"I will always be okay with there being an us. Even if you muddle my heart into the bottom of a glass and drink it."

You snort at this, an airy laugh escaping your lips as you reach to wipe your eyes. "Quite the image." "Ah, nah. Just a fool, a court jester for the lady." He rolls his eyes, making you scoff as you brush your lips to his. 

"I thought you were going to kiss me that night. When I told you I picked up Mingyu and Tzuyu's shifts." You whisper, and he hums in response, feeling his heart thundering in his ears as your lips touch his briefly. "Would you have? Kissed me, I mean?" "If I had moved any closer to you, I probably would have. You have no idea how often I think about it." He confesses, before feeling you nod, your leg draping over his hip as you pull him closer. His hand instinctively finds home high on your thigh, before sliding up to rest on the small of your back. "Did you want to kiss me the night of my birthday?" "God, so badly." You squeeze your eyes shut, pressing your forehead to his as you let out a sigh. "I felt like Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice after he helped Elizabeth into that carriage." "Quite the image." He mocks you, feeling his cheeks warm as your eyes meet his. "Would you let me kiss you now?" You don't respond, opting to press your lips to his gently. Your fingers gingerly cradled his cheek as he kissed you back, his eyes fluttering shut. His hand on your back clutches the fabric of your shirt, his chest warm at the shyness of your lips moving against his. He pulls back slightly, his eyes trailing across your face. "Are you sure you want to do this?" "More than I've ever been of anything in my entire life." You nodded against his arm, and he silently pushed you onto your back, his fingers barely breaching the hem of your shirt. Your skin is hot against his fingertips as he settles between your legs, his thumb rubbing circles into your hip as you blink up at him. "Are you?" "I don't want this to be the first time I say it, so can we sidebar this? Off the record?" He murmurs, and you raise a brow as you open your mouth to speak but he interrupts you "I love you, Y/N."

Your lips twitch slightly, your hands floating to cover your cheeks. You separate your fingers slightly, peeking up at him with a mumbled whisper.

"You promise?" "Oh, darling." He pulls your hands off your face, your eyes slightly glazed as he interlaces your fingers together and pins them to either side of your head. His lips pepper kisses across your face, paying special attention to the scrunch in your nose before he stops over your lips. Your eyes blink owlishly up at him as he speaks. "I promise."

Your smile spreads against his lips as he kisses you gently, before you kiss him back. You let him lead, one of his hands moving to hold your jaw as yours slides to his hip, squeezing gently. 

"Sidebar?" "Yes?" "I love you, too."

TWO WEEKS LATER…

"Babe, I need a Guinness." You slid around the bar with a grin on your face, Minghao's cheek ruddy as he tongued his cheek. Kwon Soonyoung – a regular, one that often downed six or seven whiskey sours before calling his situationship for a late night hookup – eyed you as you crouched to slip a wad of bills into your lockbox. He watched the way Minghao's hand instinctively covered the edge of the bar as he poured with one hand, the way your hand lingered on Minghao's hip as Jeonghan made his way over with his clipboard in his hand.

"Minghao." "Mr. Yoon." You smirked, squeezing Minghao's hip gently before leaning over the bar as Jeonghan rolled his eyes. Minghao clicked his tongue, sliding the Guinness over to you before shooing you away. You stuck your tongue out at him, before zipping away.

"Do you think you could cover Seungkwan's prep shift tomorrow? I'll pay you for time and a half, and it's only three hours before closing." Jeonghan's eyes were pleading, and Minghao opened his mouth to speak before he caught you talking to a customer with a soft smile on your face.

He thinks about how you laid in his bedroom two weeks ago, snuggling with him and letting your lips take over your mind as you kissed him over and over. He thinks about how you admitted to reapplying to another graduate program across town, one that would severely impact your hours at work. He remembers saying he hopes you get in, to not worry about work. He remembers how he said he's got it, he can take care of everything, of you.

He remembers how you straddled him then, his hands sliding on your hips as you kissed him eagerly. 

He remembers how you paced back and forth like a caged animal when you found out acceptance letters would be mailed soon. He remembers how you laid on the couch with your head hanging over the edge of the cushions, groaning in anticipation as he made lunch.

He remembers how you bolted for the mailbox after lunch, returning with a stack of mail but holding your letter between your teeth. He remembers how you anxiously ripped the envelope open, your hand fumbling for his when he pulled you into his chest and held the letter away. He remembers telling you to take a deep breath, kissing your forehead gently and sitting you down on the couch. He remembers how you threw your arms around him as you read your acceptance out loud.

"Minghao. Are you listening?" "Huh? Sorry." He winces, clearing his throat before shaking his head. "I can't, actually. I'm…" He trails off as you tap the tip of your pen to your notepad, before he makes out your lips telling the customers you'd be back for their food orders. Your eyes met his as you scampered back over, your hip nudging Jeonghan's as you slid in next to him.

"Minghao, I need you to focus." Jeonghan waved his hand in Minghao's face, "Can you work it or not? It's fine if you can't." "Work what?" You ask with a wiggle of your brows, reaching over the bar and stealing a maraschino cherry from the open jar. Minghao frowns, waving your hand away as you pull the fruit off the stem, winking his way. 

"I'm asking him if he can work the prep shift tomorrow, but he's not answering." Jeonghan rolled his eyes, flipping the blue pen between his fingers as you hum, nodding your head. "He can't." You shrug, and Minghao opens his mouth but you beat him to it. "We have a date tomorrow night. Good luck finding a cover, though." 

You tilt your head as you shrug again, this time, unapologetically. Facing Minghao again, you smile softly. "I need a cosmopolitan. Susie is back and she's getting divorced!" Minghao can't hear anything but you, and Jeonghan simply shakes his head and slips away. Soonyoung watches as you slide away again, hearing you tell Minghao you'll be back after getting the fountain drinks for Susie's table.

"I thought you didn't have a crush on the new girl, Xu." Soonyoung wiggles his brows, making Minghao scoff as he grabs a shaker off the drying rack. He flips it, scooping ice into it as he sighs. 

"I don't have a crush on her. I'm in love with her."

He can't focus on anything but the way you zip around the restaurant, his eyes trained on the smiles you give out, the way you hand out crayons and kids menus. He watches the way you gleefully serve people, how you gladly grab phones and cameras for photos.

How you peer at him over your shoulder when you walk by.

How you smile shyly when his fingers brush yours when he hands you a drink.

How you sneakily kiss his shoulder when the restaurant is closed, your hands wrapped around his waist as he holds your can of orange juice in his hand. How you ignore Jeonghan's incessant teasing, how Tzuyu recites long-winded rants of how she told you so.

"Friend, roommate, coworker?" Minghao repeats as you tuck his portion of your tips into his back pocket, and Tzuyu grins as Minghao slides her to-go strawberry lemonade across the bar. "Boyfriend, fiancé, husband." She says cheekily, and Minghao looks over his shoulder to see you biting back a smile as you brush trash onto the dustpan. "I told her so. I told her you guys would be something more." "So did I." Jeonghan calls from across the restaurant, slotted behind the cashier's station as he thumbs through the register. Mingyu pokes his head out of the kitchen as he fumbles with the lights, a mumble of so did I from his lips as he finally turns them off.

"So much for muddling your heart at the bottom of a glass, huh?" You murmur, as the two of you leave the restaurant hand-in-hand. The two of you ignore the hooting and hollering of your coworkers as Minghao opens your door, leaning over your frame to buckle in your seatbelt. He glances at your lips, before pressing a chaste kiss to them with a smile. "All I know is that if you're meant to break my heart – so be it." "I love you." "I love you, too."

haologram © 2025 || no translations, reposting or modifications are allowed. do not claim as your own. viewer discretion is advised. your media consumption is your responsibility.

[moonmaiden1996]

Love at First Sight (According to Nagumo, Anyway) Part 6

The days after that disastrous dinner blurred together into a suffocating haze of anxiety and disbelief. One moment, you seethed with anger, the next, fear gripped you like an iron vice, followed by an exhausting parade of emotions—resentment, unease, frustration. You couldn’t shake the uncanny sensation of being watched, of Nagumo’s smirk lurking at the edges of your vision even in your solitude. Even strangers' faces seemed to twist into that same knowing grin, their eyes glinting with an unspoken secret, as if they, too, knew something you didn't. You felt hunted, like prey caught in the unrelenting gaze of a predator, and no amount of rationalizing could quiet the dread curling in your gut.

The gifts started before you even stepped into your office as boss.

At first, they seemed innocent—small, almost thoughtful. A bouquet of your favorite flowers, their scent sweet but suffocating, left on your desk the morning after your promotion was announced. A bottle of imported sake with a handwritten note: To celebrate your well-earned success, my love. - N.

Then, it escalated. Quickly.

An expensive silk scarf in your favorite color. Jewelry too extravagant for casual wear. A designer dress that fit too well, as if he had taken your exact measurements. Every item a silent declaration, an invisible chain tightening around your throat. Your coworkers whispered, some envious, others amused. Some assumed you had a wealthy admirer; others speculated about a secret affair with the company owner. None of them knew the truth.

Nagumo was watching. And he was making it clear you belonged to him.

It became too much.

You called in sick, claiming a stomach bug, knowing full well it sounded more reasonable than admitting you were being stalked by a deranged man.

Working from home provided little relief. He still found ways to reach you. Delivery drivers knocked on your door every few hours, dropping off food from high-end restaurants, medications, even scented candles and plush blankets. When you stopped answering, the deliveries didn’t stop. They simply piled up outside your door, an ever-growing monument to his persistence.

Then, Aoi arrived.

She stood at your door, arms full of bags, her ever-cheerful smile not dimmed in the slightest by your obvious discomfort. Behind her, little Hana peeked around her legs, clutching a tiny first aid kit with both hands, all sweetness and light.

“You weren’t answering, so Nagumo asked me to bring this to you personally! He was so worried. Sakamoto had to pin him down before he did something dramatic… but oh, look at you! Poor thing, working so hard even when you’re sick.”

You hesitated, your grip tightening on the edge of the door. “I… I’m fine, really. You didn’t have to—”

“Oh, it’s no trouble!” she chirped, stepping inside before you could stop her. “Besides, Nagumo worries about you a lot.”

Your stomach twisted. “He shouldn’t.”

Aoi giggled, completely unbothered. “He can’t help it. He’s a little strange, I know, but he’s really sweet in his own way. He just wants to make you happy.”

You swallowed hard, watching her set the food on your table as if she belonged there. “Why?”

“Because he loves you,” she said simply, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. “I just brought some medicine and side dishes so you don’t have to worry while you recuperate.”

You let out a dry laugh. “I’m not sick. The only thing I need to recuperate from is having a creepy assassin follow me around like a lovesick puppy. Did you know he’s an assassin?”

Aoi sighed, casting a glance at Hana. “Hana, sweetheart, go play while Auntie and I talk.”

Auntie. The word made you bristle.

Hana brightened. “Yay! Does this mean Uncle Nagumo is gonna stop moping? He ruins my princess tea parties.”

“We’ll see, Hana.” Aoi ushered her toward the low table before turning back to you. “Now, as for your question… yes, I know.”

Your stomach dropped. “And you think that’s normal?”

Aoi’s expression softened. “Love is never normal or logical.” She exhaled, voice tinged with nostalgia. “Sakamoto was an assassin too, you know. He gave it up for me. Left everything behind so we could have a normal life—no more killing, no more running. Just us, our shop, our daughter. He chose me over everything else.”

You blinked, stunned by her sincerity.

“I won’t lie,” she admitted. “At first, it was terrifying. Knowing what he was, what he’d done. But over time, I realized he wasn’t just an assassin. He was Sakamoto. The man who loved me, who would do anything to keep me safe, to make me happy.” Her smile turned wistful. “Nagumo… he’s different, but he cares about you in his own way. He just wants to make you happy.”

You didn’t answer.

“Why don’t I put these away and we can talk more?” Aoi suggested, ever the picture of warmth and patience.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

The walls of your apartment felt smaller, suffocating. Despite the stacked dishes, the neatly packed meals Aoi had brought , you needed to get out. Have some normalcy at least.

Desperate for fresh air, for something normal, you decided to slip out for a quick errand. A simple meal, some solitude, a chance to breathe without feeling like someone was looming over your shoulder. A solo restaurant sounded ideal—less chance of being followed, less risk of running into him. Even if he did which he probably was going to do he could bother you at the restaurant. Hell, you might even have some sake while you were there, the sparkling kind that you had that time. If you had enough of it you might be in a better position to slap some sense into Nagumo once he sprung out from wherever he was hiding.

You quickened your pace, heart hammering. The restaurant was only a block away but you were determined to get off the street before the black haired assassin sprung out like some goddam jack in the box. A quiet meal, a moment of peace, and then you’d return home, lock the door, and deal with the tattooed assassin tomorrow if you could. Just one normal evening. Just—

A rough hand clamped over your mouth.

You barely had time to react before you were yanked into an alleyway, the dim streetlights vanishing behind the looming figures that surrounded you.

Panic flared in your chest.

You struggled, twisting, kicking, but there were too many. Hands gripped your arms, pinning you against the cold brick wall. A knife glinted under the flickering light.

“Well, well,” a voice sneered. “Looks like we found ourselves a little lost lamb. Our client will be very happy.”

Terror clawed up your throat.

You opened your mouth to scream—

I rewrite this a billion times. Trying to get this right....how did I do???

LIKE. COMMENT. RQUEST.

And for the love of all that is holy someone send me some requests of for Jinshi x Reader or Nagumo x reader

[m4iya]

⋆⭒˚.⋆𝜗𝜚 Order up! Strawberry green tea, 100% sugar, 50% ice and rainbow jelly for anon!

Cat Therapy Kuroo Tetsuro (fluff, high school, childhood friends)

"So? How was it?"

"...Failed."

Your slumped head, exaggerated sigh and inability to form a comprehensive sentence already told him all he needed to know.

"Come on, it couldn't have been that hard." Grabbing the chair from the table in front of yours, he sat down.

"Tetsuro, I barely finished the first page. It was only two pages."

He drew a sharp breath, seemingly coming to terms with your performance on the exam. Sure, it marked the end of midterms, but you couldn't ignore way your marks were beginning to weigh down on you.

"Hey, there's still final exams." He chuckled lightly, trying to ease some of your stress. "But for now, your brain could use some rest."

He'd always been that way; asking about how you were feeling all the time. When it came to studies, the two of you almost always worked together, spending full days at the library or over at each others houses, rarely leaving one another's sides.

As the bell signalling the end of the day sounded throughout the school, you stood up from your table, yawning. Slinging your bag over your shoulder, you wondered what you'd do once you got home other than lamenting on your marks.

Grabbing his own bag, he turned back to you.

"Got any plans?"

"Not really."

"Alright..." He paused, tapping his chin in thought. "Let's do something then."

The two of you exited the class together, pushing through the bustling crowds in the hallways. It seemed most of the students were feeling excited for the break; it made you wonder how they were able to let loose so fast.

You'd always been somewhat of a stress bucket; getting teased by Kuroo for worrying so much about things that didn't need more than a simple decision. When he'd injure himself as a kid, you always made sure to stay beside him, worrying that he'd do something rash. Or when he was down, it'd make you overthink on what had happened instead of just being outright and asking him.

As you both reached the school gates, the noise died down and your conversation continued.

"So? Have anywhere in mind?" You questioned.

"Yep, finally thought of a place." He replied, taking out his phone. "Just gotta navigate to it - bear with me.."

You couldn't help but giggle as he fiddled with the maps application on his phone. Once he finally figured it out, the both of you took off walking. On the way there, you passed by various shops selling trinkets and accessories. He suggested that you come back together afterwards, or on another day - you had the whole break ahead of you after all.

After around 10 minutes of walking, you found yourself standing in front of a place you'd never seen before.

"Have you ever been to a Cat Cafe?"

"Never even heard of a place like that." You replied, intrigued. "Also not a somewhere I'd imagine you'd go to."

"I'll have you know that I'm quite fond of cats!"

After you jokingly quizzed him on different cat breeds, you both decided it was time to actually go inside the place. He took the door for you, allowing you to enter before him. It was cozy on the inside, natural light seeping in through the parted sepia curtains, and faux vines lining the edges of the ceiling. In the distance, occasional meowing could be heard.

Kuroo made his way to the counter at the front and spoke to the woman there. In a few minutes, she led you both past a small gate into the cafe seating area where different types of cats were roaming around, doing various things. Some slept while others poked their heads into different people seated on couches and tables.

Taking a seat on one of the couches alongside Kuroo, it wasn't long before a cat jumped onto the arm of the couch, simply staring at you both. He held out his hand to the cat, and it followed, bunting it’s head into his palm.

"Aww, thats so cute..!" You commented, watching as the cat made it’s way onto his lap and simply sat there as he traced his hand over it’s back.

"Wow, it's fur is really soft." He chuckled. You hadn't known he was seriously into things like this. You felt a subtle excitement radiate from him, and you couldn't help but smile as you watched him pet the cat with such care.

You held out your hand and pet the cat on its head. It leaned into your touch, and you could practically feel your heart melting.

Soon after, a large cat made its way towards you, standing at your feet. "Oh wow.." You giggled, looking over at Kuroo. "Do you think thats all fat or fluff?"

"Why don't you find out?" He laughed.

Picking up the cat and plopping it onto your lap, you discovered that it was simply very, very fluffy. It faced you with its head, and you couldn't help scratch it’s chin.

With the ambience of the cafe alongside with the cozy atmosphere, and not to mention - the various cats - you slowly began to feel the things that weighed down on you earlier suddenly disappear.

Soon enough, the cat had curled up on your lap, looking as though it was preparing for a nap. You continued to gently caress its back, feeling absorbed in the softness of its coat.

"How're you feeling?" He asked, having noticed your relaxation.

"A lot better." You smiled softly, fingers lost in the cat's fur. "But how did you know I was down?"

"How wouldn't I know?" He scoffed jokingly. "I've practically lost count of how many years we've known each other.. but I just know." The cat on his lap perked its head up, jumping off to the ground, and the fluffy cat that was half asleep moments ago followed soon after.

"You didn't need to do this though.. how much did you pay?"

"Not telling! Instead, I want to see you relaxing more, okay?" He smiled, brushing some fur off his pants.

The two of you had been hanging out together for so many years. You knew so much about him and it seemed he knew tons about you as well. What makes you happy, sad, angry, annoyed; over the years, he'd learnt all these different things about you, coming up with his own ways to combat them.

He was always worrying more than you knew - he'd scold you for stressing even though he was practically the same when it came to you.

But despite you being such a handful, he never once left you to struggle alone.

extra:

before entering the cafe...

"Okay, what does a Siamese cat look like?" You questioned.

"It's, well, it's sort of toasty looking." He responded in a slightly hurried manner.

"Hm, alright. Lets up the ante then." Taking out your phone, you began to search for something.

"Hey, you can't do that!"

"I'm the one asking questions here!" Once you came across something difficult, you chuckled, meeting his gaze with squinted eyes.

"Name 5 breeds that start with the letter T."

"Cut it out, this isn't a game show!"

[hoeleeheeseung]

6:56 pm

synopsis: you had a bad day at work and heeseung pampers you with all his love and care.

warnings: mention of anxiety, panic attacks and other disturbing concepts.

a/n : this one's pure fluff!! felt so sub today, i ended up writing a fluff fic instead of smut 💀. not proofread!!

p.s: wrote this in 20 minutes :)

-------------------------------------------

You drive back home after a long day of work, you were exhausted, your boss has yelled at you in front of interns; yes, INTERNS.

He managed to bring tears to your eyes, and it wasn't even your fault, but of course you had to take the blame because the person who committed the mistake was an intern who was being trained under your supervision.

You could still hear his words, that had managed to trigger your anxiety from years ago.

You felt tears brim in your eyes, as you remembered his exact words.

" You're a pathetic employee! Is this how you're supposed to train interns?! They surely learnt such wrong actions from you, who else would've taught them to mess up an immensely important meeting?! To say that we trusted you out of all employees to train interns!!"

Tears rolled down your cheeks as you remembered the encounter, which only further reminded you of your previous boss in a different company, who had managed to harass you in that company for about 3 years before you finally quit.

You parked the car in the driveway, but didn't move for a while, crying your heart out in the car itself, just so that you wouldn't have to burden Heeseung with your work shit.

You didn't know how long you'd been in the car crying, before you got a text message from Heeseung.

Are you on your way home yet? it's a little past your usual time, so I was just worried.

You checked the time on your phone, it was almost 7, it had been around half an hour since you'd reached home but stayed put in the car.

You finally mustered the courage to step out of the car and walk towards your door, ringing the doorbell; checking your face for any swelling due to crying, you knew Heeseung would figure out right away from your puffy face that you were crying.

He opened the door, standing there, looking like an absolute angel in his grey sweatpants and white tee, with a smile plastered on his face just by the sight of you.

His smile faltered upon realising that you had been crying, unfortunately for you, your bloodshot red eyes and tear stained face gave it away.

Without uttering a single word, Heeseung pulled you in a hug, bringing you inside along with him.

He helped you take your shoes off and put your coat away, along with your other belongings, before he finally spoke.

" hi baby, did something happen?"

His angelic voice, that usually managed to heal your heart, was now just a stimulus that triggered your tears to toll down your cheeks again.

His heart twisted upon seeing you burst into tears.

He pulled you into another hug, caressing your hair and mumbling sweet things in your ear.

He instantly understood that you're not yet ready to talk about it, so instead of trying to get you to talk, he simply helped you get to the bedroom, helping you sit on the bed before making his way to your part of the closet to pull out your favourite baby pink satin pyjamas.

" I'm going to run you a warm bath, and get you your favourite snacks to eat while you relax, okay? I'll also pop in your favourite bath bubble and light some candles, just wait here, love"

He prepared the perfect bath for you, helping you get settled in the bathtub before placing a small kiss on your temple.

" I'm going to order some pizza and we can watch whatever movie you want, okay?"

He left the bathroom, to go prepare everything else for your self care night before heading back in to be with you.

You were sitting in the bathtub, a lack of emotion visible on your face. You just felt empty now. For most people, their work trouble wouldn't be something that they'd carry back home with them, but that was something you struggled with.

After the pizza came, Heeseung set it on the kitchen counter, immediately rushing back in to help you get comfortable in your pyjamas.

" Darling, I'll be stepping out for a while, I'll be back soon, i promise. You can pick a movie by then"

He quickly rushed out, and you knew he was gone when you heard the front door shut.

You sighed heavily before heading to the kitchen to get yourself some water.

You made yourself comfortable on the couch, waiting for Heeseung to return, when suddenly the most horrifying thought passed through your head.

The thought of Heeseung leaving you.

This usually happened to you, you would step into a loop of self-critical and apathetic thoughts whenever your anxiety was triggered.

You felt tears welling up in your eyes again as you prayed for Heeseung to return soon. Not much later, you heard the front door open and close and there stood Heeseung.

You practically ran towards him to engulf him in a hug, bursting into tears at the sight of him.

" Baby, I'm here. I'm sorry, was i gone for too long? I just went out to get flowers for you, and look! I found your favourite chocolate too!!"

You looked up just to see Heeseung with a bouquet in one hand and a box of chocolates in another.

" Let's go sit down, okay angel?"

You sat down on the couch as he got your favourite quilt to cuddle under, before he switched the TV on and joined you on the couch.

The flowers and chocolates set on the coffee table in front of you along with the pizza.

You held Heeseung close to you, inhaling his scent in, feeling a little at peace.

"Hee?"

he immediately paused the show before turning to look at you, giving you his full attention.

" Yes love? Do you want to talk about it?"

You nodded, before sighing.

You told him about everything that happened and how everything just came crashing down on you, triggering your anxiety. You told him about how it made you feel humiliated.

Heeseung held your face in his hands, looking at you fondly before speaking.

" Sweetheart, if the job gets stressful for you at any point, you can come to me and talk about it. Also, if your boss thinks you're so incompetent, then you can just quit your job, okay?"

He paused before continuing

" I know it seems to be too big of a deal for you to quit your job, but baby, I want you to know that nothing is more important to me than you, okay? You don't have to work, especially if it's this stressful for you, alright? If this boss of yours makes you feel overwhelmed, then trust me, we'll find you another job if you'd like, okay?"

you nodded

" If ever, you feel like you don't want to work, you always have me to rely on, I'll be there to take care of you, provide you with absolutely everything, okay? You can take a break from this stressful work life to focus on yourself, okay?"

Heeseung's words made you wonder how you'd managed to get someone like him in your life, you immediately pulled him in for a kiss, cupping his face in your hands.

He smiled against your lips, holding you firmly in his embrace, pulling you closer.

You continued to watch the show, before you dozed off halfway through, sleeping in his embrace as he peppered your face with pecks and kisses, holding you close to him and keeping you warm in his embrace.

[spore-loser]

Morrigan, Nesta, and the Hewn City

A number of readers don't see why others find Mor to not be a "girl's girl" type of character. SJM's narrative had her welcome Feyre with open arms, but Mor's reaction to and treatment of Feyre differs greatly than with others.

To start off, let's look at Mor's relationship with Nesta. They had a disastrous first interaction, and it immediately put Mor at odds with her. 

Some readers say they didn't notice any nastiness on Mor's end, but you just have to look at the text to see that's not true.

Some readers excuse it as Mor treating Nesta that way to defend Feyre and Cassian, but Mor treated Nesta in a way that overstepped only worrying about friends. 

If it was about Feyre, well Feyre always checked Rhys when he disparaged Nesta. Mor could have taken the lead from that. Feyre forgave Nesta for their past, wanted to move on, and that was family business between the sisters.

If it was about Cassian, Mor had no business getting between them either. Feyre wondered if they were mates since ACOWAR, so others likely wondered too. That's a situation best left to the possibly bonded. Mor wasn't in a relationship with or in love with Cassian, she was just using him as a buffer with Azriel.

For examples of poor treatment, there are many that show Mor was rude and irrational when it came to Nesta.

The first time they interacted isn't the 'Nesta is just a bitch' situation it's made out to be. Some readers say Mor was only being friendly, was just trying to be welcoming of Nesta, but that isn't a take supported by the text.

“Where did that dress come from?” Mor said, red gown flowing behind her as she breezed toward Nesta. My sister drew up short, shoulders tensing, readying to— But Mor was already there, fingering the heavy blue fabric, surveying every stitch. “I want one,” she pouted. Her attempt, no doubt, to segue into an invitation to shop for a larger wardrobe with me. [Mor conversing with Feyre about Rhys picking the dress] “He gets all the credit for clothes,” Mor said, examining the fabric of Nesta’s skirt while my sister monitored like a hawk, “and he never tells me where he finds them. He still won’t tell me where he found Feyre’s dress for Starfall.” [...] “It’s a good thing we’re not the same size—or else I might be tempted to steal that dress.” “Likely right off her,” Cassian muttered. Mor’s answering smirk wasn’t reassuring. (ACOWAR, Ch. 17)

This was not very long after Nesta and Elain were thrown into the Cauldron. In reality, Mor's behavior was inconsiderate and insensitive of someone who recently had their bodily autonomy violated.

Invading her personal space.

Grabbing her dress up.

Ignoring her verbally before finally acknowledging her.

Smiling at a joke about stripping her. 

It isn't something you'd expect from a character who, according to SJM's narrative, is supposed to be sensitive to victims. The interaction wasn't about complimenting Nesta, because Mor knew the dress was given to her. She asked Feyre about it. This wasn't simply a friendly encounter. Nesta acting how she did with Mor was not starting an uncomfortable situation – it was reacting to a situation that was already uncomfortable for her.

After the IC got back from a battle, Nesta asked them where Cassian was. Instead of simply answering, Mor went off on her.

And Nesta had been … pacing in the foyer. As if she was worried. I opened my mouth, but Mor beat me to it. “He’s busy.” I’d never heard her voice so … sharp. Icy. [...] if the Illyrian warrior no longer stood as a physical and emotional buffer between her and Azriel … And worse, if the person who caused that vacancy was Nesta … Mor said flatly, “When he gets back, keep your forked tongue behind your teeth.” My heart leaped into a furious beat, my arms slack at my sides at the insult, the threat. But Rhys said, “Mor." (ACOWAR, Ch. 39)

Another time, Mor tried to interrupt a conversation Cassian and Nesta were having, which was in no way hostile. It wasn't like she was trying to defend Cassian or anything; she was just being territorial.

Mor sagged a bit, jewelry glinting with the movement, and went to take Cassian’s arm. But he’d at last approached Nesta. And as the world began to turn to shadows and wind, I saw Cassian tower over my sister, saw her chin lift defiantly, and heard him growl, “Hello, Nesta.” Rhys seemed to halt his winnowing as my sister said, “So you’re alive.” Cassian bared his teeth in a feral grin, wings flaring slightly. “Were you hoping otherwise?” Mor was watching—watching so closely, every muscle tense. She again reached for his arm, but Cassian angled out of reach, not tearing his eyes from Nesta’s blazing gaze. (ACOWAR, Ch. 42)

Another time Nesta worried about Cassian, Mor rudely sent her on her way after Feyre said he was ok.

Nesta stood by the nearest tent, an empty water bucket between her feet. Her hair a damp mess atop her mud-flecked head. Watching us emerge, grim-faced— “He's fine. Healed and awake,” I said quickly. Nesta’s shoulders sagged a bit. She’d saved me the trouble of hunting her down to ask her about tracking the Cauldron. Better to do it now, with some privacy. Especially before Amren arrived. But Mor said coldly, “Shouldn’t you be refilling that bucket?” (ACOWAR, Ch. 27)

The comments Mor made in ACOSF are particularly bad.

The first is when she was having brunch with Cassian, where she brought up Nesta unprompted, was snide about her, then outright callous.

“She’s settled, then?” Cassian knew who she meant. “Taking a nap.” Mor snorted. “Don’t.” His attention drifting to the glittering Sidra mere feet away. “Please don’t." Mor sipped her tea, the portrait of elegant innocence. “We’d be better off throwing Nesta into the Court of Nightmares. She’d thrive there.” (ACOSF, Ch. 4)

Mor knows more than anyone how a "difficult" woman would absolutely not thrive in a sexist society. It was actually a ridiculous statement to make. Nesta's whole reason for being sent to the House of Wind and training was because the IC considered her "out of control". Feyre straight up admitted it.

Mor was projecting her abuser onto Nesta, when Nesta is not comparable to Keir. In fact, she is more comparable to Mor. She was drinking excessively, which Mor does too, often taking full days to recover. Nesta was shamed for having meaningless sex, but Mor will have sex with someone she doesn't even like to put off Azriel, rather than have an honest discussion with him. 

The second time Mor made comments was in Windhaven camp, where she didn't actually have to be. She doesn't rule over it, nor was she involved in Nesta's training. I wondered why she was even there when she hates it so much. 

Mor’s face was pale, tight. “I hate this place,” she said under her breath, the heat of it clouding the air in front of us. “It should be burned to the ground.” (ACOMAF, Ch. 45)

It seemed like Mor just came to get into Nesta's business. She taunted her 'quietly' because she didn't want Cassian hearing.

No amusement lit Morrigan’s face as she shifted her attention down to Nesta. “Why aren’t you out there?” “I’m taking a break. Morrigan’s gaze swept over Nesta’s face, noting the lack of sweat or flushed skin, the hair barely out of place. The female said quietly, “My vote would have been to dump you right back in the human lands, you know.” (ACOSF, Ch. 6)

The human lands, where Nesta would have to live in hiding at risk of human prejudice and violence. How is anything Nesta did deserving of that? An abrasive personality and having bad coping mechanisms for PTSD deserves living in danger 24/7? 

Dark fire simmered in Morrigan’s eyes. “I knew plenty of people like you once.” Her hand drifted to her abdomen. “You never deserve the benefit of the doubt that good people like him give you.” (ACOSF, Ch. 6)

Again, this is wild projection. It's an unkind take on someone who is suffering from depression and does not want to have her life completely controlled.

Something to notice, is that the times Nesta lashed out in ACOMAF and onward were mostly in reaction to the IC crossing her boundaries. In reality, Nesta wasn't as bad as Mor made her out to be. She was essential to the war effort, helped in every aspect (diplomacy, strategy, battle, in the camps) because she actually does care about people – but Mor gave her no credit for it. 

When Cassian approached them, we learned that Mor, who winnowed him and Nesta, had come early. 

Cassian had reached them, breathless and gleaming with sweat. “You’re early.” “I wanted to see how things were coming along.” Morrigan pulled her burning gaze from Nesta. “Seems like today was a slow start.” (ACOSF, Ch. 6)

So she did just come to be in Nesta's business and make spiteful comments. Some mean girl energy there. Ironic when certain readers say Mor disliked Nesta for being that way.

Mor did end up coming around to being nicer to Nesta, though. We weren't given her reasoning over it, but I'm positive it was because of Nesta encouraging the priestesses to come out of their shells and train to be Valkyries. In my opinion, Mor realized she had been harsh on Nesta and that calmed her down. Also, I think the IC having Nesta distract Eris made Mor feel sympathy, probably seeing how similiar they actually were and all that. So Mor stopped coming between Cassian and Nesta, and secretly taught him to dance so he could surprise Nesta.

Some readers question if Nesta would have been receptive to Mor even if she had been welcoming. An example to look to is Azriel and Nesta – they were perfectly fine because he minded his own business concerning the Archeron sisters and Cassian's possible relationship with Nesta. Nesta was even friends with Amren until they had their falling out, which only happened because Nesta didn't want to train her powers.

So that's one relationship with a person Mor was disinclined to like based on her friends. Let's look at others, who are outside Mor's circle in Velaris — in the Hewn City.

“As my Third, Mor is my … court overseer. She looks after the dynamics between the Court of Nightmares and the Court of Dreams, and runs both Velaris and the Hewn City. I suppose in the mortal realm, she might be considered a queen.” (ACOMAF, Ch. 18)

Mor has a direct hand in running the Hewn City, but she barely goes. Her experiences of having been from there understandably traumatized her. Even just the thought of a pending IC trip distresses her.

But she’d left after dinner, pale-faced and jumpy, ignoring Cassian’s attempt to speak with her.

“Why did Mor look so disturbed [...] ?” ( ACOMAF, Ch. 41)

Yet Mor having trauma doesn't make her think of what other daughters of the HC have gone through and are still being subjected to by male relatives or even Keir himself.

Keir paused at the threshold as the doors opened on a phantom wind. He said to Rhys, perhaps the closest he’d come to asking for permission to leave, “Lord Thanatos is having … difficulties with his daughter again. He requires my assistance.” Rhys only waved a hand, as if he hadn’t just yielded our city to the male.

After Rhys' deal with Keir to let HC folk into Velaris, all Mor cared about was Keir.

She waved a hand to the town house, the city. “This is my home, and you are going to let Keir destroy it.”

“I took precautions,” Rhys said—an edge to his voice I had not heard in some time. “Many of them. Starting with meeting with the governors of the Palaces and getting them to agree never to serve, shelter, or entertain Keir or anyone from the Court of Nightmares.”

“They have been sending out the word to every business owner in the city,” Rhys went on, “every restaurant and shop and venue. So Keir and his ilk may come here … But they will not find it a welcoming place. Or one where they can even procure lodgings.”

(ACOWAR, Ch. 27)

There was no thought from Mor about all the innocents who could benefit from being outside the HC, who should be able to have time not being trapped inside a mountain with their abusive relatives and Keir.

Some readers say Mor's actions against Nesta are about having principles, about defending Feyre from an abusive relative—but Mor never does that for anyone else.

The IC and Mor act like she is the only innocent, the only 'dreamer' from the HC. She is in a position to help others suffering like she had suffered—but she does nothing about it. People could be freed from an oppressive system if Mor and Rhys took Keir out of the picture, for Mor to step into his position. But they let Keir stay in charge, keeping that system in place. It's hypocritical on Mor's part to be so hostile to Nesta if her reason is about defending a victim. The IC as a government lets girls and women in 2/3rds of their court suffer oppressed lives of victimhood and they do nothing to help them.

[2i1han]

Slowly, Then All at Once

1 : before it all began , slowly

𖹭 pairing: classmate!leehan x fem!reader

𖹭 word count: 8k 𖹭 genre: fluff, a bit angsty, slow-burn (so bear with it), young adult, coming-of-age 𖹭 tags: boynextdoor , non-idol au, high school/college au , first love , neighbor!leehan , extrovert!leehan , cold!leehan , extrovert!reader

𖹭 characters mentioned : kim leehan , kim woonhak , sakai moka , kim minji , han taesan , park minju , jung wooyoung , ham jinsik

𖹭 warnings: no warnings! sfw

𖹭 synopsis : you and leehan have always known each other—classmates since ninth grade, always familiar but never really close due to leehan's indifference. but when his brother enters the picture, and you ending up in the same building as him, everything starts to change. unresolved situation that were once buried begin to surface, and leehan must decide: let go or finally take a chance.

𖹭 important note : i'm using the korean age and education system. here’s a quick guide for those unfamiliar :

korean age system: adds one year at the start of each new year (ex : if your international age is 20, your korean age is 21.)

korean education system: elementary (1st–6th grade) - middle school (7th–9th grade) high school (10th–12th grade) - uni follows after high school.

𖹭 a/n : hi, everyone! this is my first fanfic on tumblr, and i’m still getting used to the platform. this story will be divided into five full parts, so if you enjoy it, i’d really appreciate your support! i’ll be updating regularly, usually every 2 days. enjoy!

♪ playlist : midnight fiction/illit , so let's go see the stars/boynextdoor , serenade/boynextdoor , but i like you/boynextdoor , so tender/say sue me , bad/wte , light/wte , chocolate/bol4 , some/soyou , would you love me/stella jang , everyday/haebin , star drawing/yuziii , apple cider/beabadoobee

middle school

the morning was still young, and the sun had barely risen. the classroom remained dim, the fluorescent bulbs providing the only source of light while the first rays of sunlight had yet to seep in. the room was silent, occupied only by two students minding their own business-and a brunette boy sitting by the window, lost in thought.

"hey! kim leehan!"

a loud, enthusiastic voice called from the doorway, instantly breaking the quiet.

before leehan could even turn to see who it was, a familiar presence loomed over him. his friend was already there, grinning and scratching his head.

"stop it!" leehan chuckled, standing up to pull his friend in for a quick dap.

"it's the first day of your last year as a middle schooler. how does that feel, hyung?"

woonhak, ever the energetic one, nudged leehan's arm before plopping down in the seat beside him, a wide grin on his face.

leehan smirked, leaning back in his chair. "nothing out of the ordinary. school is still school," he said, voice hinting with indifference as he shifted slightly to face woonhak more comfortably.

woonhak let out an exaggerated sigh. "nothing to say about missing me? you'll leave again for high school next year." he rolled his eyes, sulking. "it's just like when i was in fifth grade, and you moved here for middle school."

leehan huffed out a small laugh at his friend's dramatic antics.

they had been best friends since their early years in elementary school. leehan, ten at the time, and woonhak, eight. being two years apart, but that never stood in the way of their friendship. if anything, their differences made them an even better match, with leehan's matured, and calm-extroverted appeal balancing out woonhak's childish and loud aura.

school didn't excite leehan much, not that it did for his friend either. but while kim why would i even need algebra in a performing arts university woonhak, treated school like a never-ending chore, leehan simply went through the flow, doing what was necessary without getting too caught up in it. outside of class, his world was split between two passions: music, and nature.

he spent hours in his room, practicing vocals and perfecting dance moves in front of his mirror, losing himself in the rhythm of the music. whether it was a slow ballad or an intense choreography, he found an escape in the way his body moved to the beat, in the way his voice carried emotion that words alone couldn't. performing gave him a sense of control, a rush of energy that school never did. but when he wasn't singing or dancing, he sought quiet comfort in his other hobbies, raising fish and tending to his plants.

his aquariums, filled with different species, were his personal oasis. he could watch them for hours, mesmerized by the way they glided through the water, unbothered by anything beyond their glass world. his room smelled of greenery, lined with potted plants he carefully nurtured. he liked the balance of it all. music filled him with energy, while his fish and plants gave him peace.

occasionally, he'd swing by woonhak's place to make music together, testing out harmonies or working on choreography late into the night. woonhak, ever the extrovert, always had something new planned, dragging leehan into whatever wild idea he had. not that leehan is the biggest introvert, nor minded, he loved performing just as much. he just didn't show it as openly as woonhak did.

despite his mixed feelings about school, his grades weren't bad. he was smart enough to keep up without trying too hard, unlike woonhak, who barely scraped by with last-minute cramming and a whole lot of luck.

"of course, i'll miss you." leehan sighed, shaking his head. "but the high school I'm going to is just near hongik. i'll visit you after classes. it's not like i'm moving overseas." he rolled his eyes before chuckling. "you're so dramatic."

woonhak let out a whine, slumping onto his desk. "well, can you blame me? this is my first year finally being in the same middle school as you, and it'll also be our last. i barely survived sixth grade without your help in elementary." he pressed his palms against his forehead, as if the weight of the world rested on his shoulders. "i have to lock in, hyung."

leehan chuckled "yeah, you should. you'll be on your own again next year." he leaned back, arms crossed. "let's just enjoy this one while it lasts, woon. save the worrying for later."

his friend peeked up from his hands, lips tugging into a small smile. "fine. but you better not forget about me when you're off being a cool high schooler."

leehan rolled his eyes again, but there was also brotherly warmth in his eyes. "as if i ever could. also, call me leehan-sunbaenim from now on," he said, completely straight-faced while pretending to look at his phone

woonhak just dramatically turned his head to leehan and let out an aish, throwing him an unimpressed look. leehan, however, burst into laughter, clearly enjoying his friend's reaction.

"that was cringe," woonhak muttered.

"how is calling your senior by a proper title cringe? hey, kim woonhak, where are your manners?" leehan teased in an exaggeratedly authoritative tone, crossing his arms like a disappointed teacher.

woonhak rolled his eyes but is chuckling. "you're still a year away from being a highschooler. i will not obey you."

leehan just rolled his eyes barely able to finish a sentence between chuckles.

they spent the rest of their free time chatting, catching up on summer, mostly woonhak complaining about how fast it ended and leehan roasting him for his questionable choices.

as time ticked on, leehan glanced at the clock and raised a brow. "woonhak, are you seriously still here? your class is in the other building."

his friend just waved off his concern like he was swatting away a fly. "oh, no, it's still early. it's not like the bell's gonna ring any sec-"

ring

the school bell blared through the hallways, as if it heard woonhak talking.

"you've got to be kidding me," he groaned, lazily scrambling to grab his bag.

leehan who's already gasping for air, tapped him on the back. "kim woonhak, good luck today," he teased.

woonhak shot him a glare as he rushed toward the door, waving over his shoulder. "catch you later, peace!"

the minute slipped away like a gust of wind, and before leehan knew it, their teacher was already standing at the front of the classroom.

"good morning, teacher," the students greeted in unison, rising briefly before settling back into their seats.

"good morning, everyone. settle down," the teacher instructed, adjusting his glasses as he placed a stack of papers on his desk. "now, before we begin, i'd like to introduce a new student who will be joining us for the school year."

then, the classroom stirred. students exchanged whispers, some craning their necks to get a better view of the doorway. the air buzzed with curiosity and the murmurs resembled a beehive.

with a subtle glance from the teacher, the new student, you, stepped in. you had a short hair that barely reached your neck, neatly parted to the side, wispy bangs, and pair of round glasses sat comfortably on your tall nose, framing your soft and slightly chubby cheeks. unlike most new students who fidgeted or hesitated, you walked in with an effortless calm.

"hello, everyone! my name is y/n. i'm 15 years old and just moved into the neighborhood down the street. i hope we can all be friends!" you bowed lightly with a voice that's bright and confident. you had a natural ease, as if introducing yourself to a room full of strangers was something you did every day.

a few students nodded approvingly, while others leaned in to whisper among themselves. you can see other students already smiling at you, while others just talked to each other.

meanwhile, the teacher scanned the room for a vacant seat. his eyes landed on leehan and the empty chair beside him. as if you're also following your teacher's vision, you see the quiet boy who seems lost in his own little world.

"you can sit there, next to that boy by the window," he said, gesturing toward leehan's row.

you nodded, and just as you're about to move, a student behind leehan raised a hand.

"sir, han taesan sits there. he's just absent today." and you're stopped to your track, standing there. though, you admit that it felt awkward, at least for yourself.

the teacher paused, nodding in acknowledgment, then began eyeing around the class again. after a brief scan, his gaze landed on a seat in the second row.

"alright, you can take that seat instead."

you nodded again, and made your way to your new spot, and within moments, you had already struck up a conversation with your seatmate, you always had this welcoming demeanor that contrasts the usual stiffness of first-day introductions. even as a kid, your parents would already describe you as a social charmer and a people person. extroverted, but balanced.

the first few periods blurred together in a haze of just few introductions for the start of the school year. the morning sun had crept higher, casting beams of light through the windows, and shining dust particles that swirled in the air. you sat comfortably listening to each hellos and my name is your classmates presented. even though the entire class you're new at already knew each other since the beginning of middle school, the new teachers are still yet to know them, and so do you.

when the bell finally rang for break, students wasted no time swarming out the door, dying to stretch their legs and escape the classroom, and you are no exception.

you had no trouble blending in. you'd already found a group to sit with, chatting easily as they made their way toward the school café.

and just as you're about to leave, your eyes caught sight of leehan, who unlike the rest of the class that had scattered in pairs or groups, remained at his desk. his left elbow rested against the desk supporting his chin, while his right hand moved lazily over a notebook, jotting something like it's straight out of an ancient manuscript with his illegible handwriting.

you admit. leehan's expression was unreadable. as a person who's good with people, scanning through people's thoughts or emotion by their body language is a piece of cake to you, but leehan? he's neither focused nor completely absent, as if his mind is hovered somewhere between a coherent thought or nothingness.

curious, and being the social butterfly ever, you adjusted your glasses and approached him.

"hello, i'm y/n. what's your name?" you said with a wave.

leehan didn't react immediately, and for a second, you thought he'll ignore you. instead, he finished the last stroke of his writing before slowly lifting his gaze. his eyes flickered towards you, scanning your face with little to no recognition, as if you're someone he sees daily.

"leehan. kim leehan," he replied flatly. his voice was low and unamused, giving the smallest head nod. his lips curved into an almost nonexistent smile, one that didn't quite reach his eyes.

the contrast between you and him was almost like seeing black and pastel colors from the point of view of a third person. you, with your bright, welcoming energy, stood opposite leehan, whose presence seemed more like muted, but not completely colorless either.

still, you were unfazed. but you'd be lying if you said you didn't feel a tinge of awkwardness, or maybe even concern.

not everyone you met responded positively to your friendly nature, and that was fine. but something about leehan felt strange. he didn't seem uncomfortable around you, nor did he try to avoid the conversation. yet, at the same time, there wasn't even a hint of enthusiasm in his words and actions. it was as if he existed in a space between acknowledgment and indifference.

"are you not going to grab a snack with a friend? you can sit with us!" you offered in a warm and inviting tone.

leehan barely hesitated before pressing his lips together. "no, i'll be out. thank you," he said in the same monotone, standing up, and nodding his head subtly as he slung his jacket over his shoulders.

without waiting for a response, he walked past you heading toward the door, most likely in search of woonhak.

you just tilted your head slightly looking back at the door watching him go. if you're bothered by his lack of interest, you didn't show it. instead, you just shrugged it off deciding that leehan was probably just the reserved, introverted type.

that thought lingered in your mind for a moment before you went off with a quiet sigh. whatever it was, you figured you'd understand him better with time. with that, you turned away and made your way toward the café, where your new friends were waiting.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

"class dismissed."

and just like that, the first day of classes in your new school comes to an end. the ring of the bell echoes through the hallways, and the classroom instantly bursts into motion. students scrambling to shove books into their bags, some reapplying makeup, others fixing their hair, and chatting away about everything and nothing.

you stand from your seat, adjusting the strap of your bag as you turn to face minji, your newly made friend. "where are you headed after class?" you ask, casually stuffing your things inside your bag.

minji, in the middle of combing her sleek black hair, tilts her head in thought. "hmm, i don't know. ask moka. i'll just tag along wherever you guys go."

moka, seated beside you, stops fussing with her hair long enough to glance up. "it's only 4:40 pm. how about karaoke?" she suggests.

you nod in agreement, and minji hums in approval. "okay, well then, hurry your butts up," moka adds, snapping her compact mirror shut.

you lean toward the small mirror in her hand giving yourself a quick once-over. with just a simple tuck of your hair behind your ears, a few pats to settle your bangs into place, and a slight nudge to adjust your thick-framed glasses, you're good to go.

"alright, done. let's go?" moka asks, slinging her bag over her shoulder.

you and minji nod in sync, stepping out into the busy hallway. but just as you're about to walk away, your gaze drifts back into the classroom, landing on the seat across the room.

leehan is still there, quietly packing up. alone.

there's something about him that makes you hesitate. it's not pity, not exactly. you've always had this habit of noticing people who seem isolated, of wanting to make them feel included. but over time, you hated it. you've realized that not everyone who sits alone is lonely. and not everyone who is quiet is sad.

still, the thought didn't stop you as you take a step forward, considering approaching him-

"kim leehan, work your slowass up, we got a gig to waaaaatch!"

a voice booms through the doorway like a bomb being dropped, so loud it cuts through the noise of the corridor crowd. you nearly jump at the volume. turning your head, you see a boy bolting into the classroom, all energy and mischief.

leehan looks up at the source of the noise. he saw you standing on the doorframe, and woonhak approaching him. but his whole attention seemed to be only towards his friend. and that's when you see it— his entire demeanor shifts. his lips curve into a genuine smile, his eyes scrunching up with amusement as he watches woonhak walk towards his desk.

the sight catches you off guard.

that smile, it's real, and bright, almost like there's a light shining behind him.

you realize then that leehan isn't some tragic, brooding loner. he's not an outcast, not sad, not lost. he has a friend. a good one, by the looks of it.

a quiet chuckle escapes you as you shake your head, cringing at your own assumptions.

i misinterpreted people again, you think, making a mental note to quit assuming stories to strangers before actually knowing them.

with that, you turn back to moka and minji, linking arms with them as the three of you make your way down the hallway.

as leehan and woonhak followed towards the door and to the hallway, the latter nudged him with a mischievous grin. "so, how was your day?"

leehan exhaled through his nose. "it was fine. there's a new student."

"ooooh." woonhak's eyes lit up. "is it a girl?"

leehan gave him a look and chuckled. "why is your first instinct always to ask if it's a girl?"

"because that's the important part, duh," woonhak shot back. "so? spill."

leehan sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "yeah, it's a girl. she's... nice, but weird."

woonhak practically bounced in excitement. "weird how? like, quirky weird or talks-to-ghosts weird?"

leehan squinted in thought. "more like... i'm the weird one. i kind of left her hanging when she tried to talk to me. i felt bad but, i just can't."

"oh? that's not a classic kim leehan behavior. you're pretty friendly."

"and my hands went cold. it was like i was getting an illness." he flexed his fingers in mild concern.

woonhak stopped in his tracks. "hyung," he pointed an accusing finger. "are you sure you don't like her?"

leehan let out a dry laugh. "nonsense, that's ridiculous. i just don't wanna talk to her kinda."

"right, right," woonhak smirked, but his mischievous grin stayed.

"enough of that," leehan grumbled, picking up his pace. "let's just go."

woonhak, of course, didn't let it go. he kept teasing, making dramatic heart gestures and batting his eyelashes.

"shut up before i leave you behind."

"say it with feeling, hyung. your voice is shaking~"

leehan rolled his eyes but couldn't hide the amused grin tugging at his lips. woonhak was insufferable, but at least he made the day less dull.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝

now walking down the busy streets of hongdae, just a few minutes from your school, the scent of street food and the buzz of students unwinding after classes fill the air. the neon lights flicker even though the sun hasn't fully set yet, giving the streets that signature youthful energy.

as you walk, you turn to moka, who's sandwiched between you and minji, and ask, "moka, is leehan really that introverted?"

both of your friends glance at you at the same time, puzzled.

"kim leehan? the leehan from our class?" moka asks, raising an eyebrow.

you nod. "yeah, he barely spoke. he just seemed cold."

moka and minji exchange a knowing look before minji giggles. "cold? leehan? are we talking about the same guy? he's pretty social, y'know."

moka nods in agreement. "yeah, i mean, he's not the most talkative person ever, but he interacts well. he's fairly outgoing. everyone likes and knows him."

"not to mention he's good-looking and talented too," minji adds with a cheeky grin.

moka gasps dramatically, shoving minji's shoulder. "oh? not as handsome as taesan though, right?" she said with a teasing smirk on her face.

minji's ears turn bright red, and she immediately hissed in annoyance "ah, this is about leehan! can you stop?"

the two of them burst into laughter, teasing each other while you zone out, lost in thought.

good-looking? you never really thought about it. leehan just seemed strange. but what's even stranger is hearing that he's supposedly social.

"but he barely interacted with anyone," you point out. "aside from his friend earlier."

"oh yeah, that loud guy. what was his name again?" moka snaps her fingers, trying to recall.

"woonhak, seventh grader." minji supplies. "they're close, huh?"

"how do you even know that? well, anyways" moka shrugs. "i noticed that too. maybe leehan just wasn't in the mood today. it happens. you know, some days you just wanna shut the world out and listen to sad music while staring dramatically out the window."

you scoff. "that's... oddly specific."

minji laughs. "she's speaking from experience."

"ya!" moka glares playfully. "i'm just saying, don't take it personally. give him time. he's nice."

their words settle in your mind, giving you a bit more confidence. they knew leehan longer than you do. maybe he didn't dislike you for no reason. maybe it really was just a bad day.

as you reach the karaoke bar, the bright led lights reflect off your glasses, and moka swings open the door. the entire evening had been fun with your new friends. although, you miss your old friends back in busan, you're still keeping in touch with them all while establishing new relationships.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

as soon as you got back to your brother's apartment where you're living. the familiar aroma of spicy ramyeon fills the air, instantly making your stomach grumble. your brother, wooyoung, is at the stove, stirring the noodles in the bubbling pot.

"you're finally home," he says, not even turning around. "it's already 7 pm. how was the first day?"

tossing your bag onto the sofa across the room, you plop down onto a dining chair and immediately reach for the cookie jar, popping one into your mouth. "it was great me and my friends went to karaoke after classes, so i got home a bit late."

wooyoung lets out an amused "ohh," lifting the pot to pour the steaming noodles into a large bowl at the center of the table. "karaoke, huh? and you didn't bother to tell me you'd be late?"

you roll your eyes, still munching. "i messaged you. you didn't answer."

wooyoung pauses, then shrugs. "oh, yeah. i was at the studio all day. just got home like, thirty minutes before you." he grabs his phone from the counter, flips it over, and sees the unread notification. "ah, whoops. my bad. haven't checked my phone."

"figured," you say, watching as he sets the table, placing down the kimchi and chopsticks before settling into the chair across from you.

then, suddenly, his face shifts into amusement. "wait, friends?"

you sigh, already regretting bringing it up. "mhm, friends from my new school," you say, trying to sound as casual as possible.

wooyoung leans forward, resting his chin on his hand like he's about to hear the most exciting gossip of his life. "and here i thought you'd spend the first month brooding in the corner."

you groan. "why do you act like i'm some kind of hermit? i do talk to people, you know."

"mhm, am i surprised, though? you've always been good at making friends. mom used to brag about how easygoing you are," wooyoung says, setting his bowl of ramyeon in front of you.

you smirk at the mention of your mom. "you're louder than me. why would she even brag about that?"

"mhm, and not just louder. i'm also cooler," he says, smoldering.

you rolled your eyes, and scoffed "right. 'cooler.'"

"glad we agree." he grins, then leans forward slightly, sneering "so... any special friends?"

you swerved a chopstick at him. "stop."

he laughs, dodging it. you sigh, knowing full well he won't let it go. "alright, alright," he says, finally getting serious. "so, what's the deal? someone already giving you a hard time?"

you hesitate. if you tell him, he's not going to leave you alone for the next thirty minutes straight. but the thought is already out in the open, and now he's just waiting for a word, watching you expectantly.

you twirl your noodles around your chopsticks, avoiding eye contact. "not really. it's just, there's this guy in my class. i tried talking to him today, and he was just, i don't know. cold? kinda distant."

wooyoung pauses mid-bite, then slowly sets his chopsticks down, his grin creeping back. "oh, he likes you."

you nearly choke on your food hearing that. "that's stupid."

"classic," he says, shaking his head. "a guy being cold to you? that's just a poorly disguised crush."

you scrunched your nose and cringed, squinting at him. "that's the worst logic i've ever heard. is that how you're supposed to act around the person you like? sounds pretty dumb to me."

wooyoung waggles his finger. "ah, you still have much to learn. sometimes, guys get all awkward when they like someone. you know, trying to play it cool and mysterious."

you make a face, just proceeding to slurp on the ramen. "right, and that's why you're single."

wooyoung gasps dramatically, clutching his pearls. "wow, that hurts."

you roll your eyes, and he finally drops the teasing, getting serious. "but honestly, maybe he's just not in the mood. or maybe he's not a super social guy. it's literally the first day. give it at least a week. or a month, even."

you think back to what moka and minji said, and now your brother too. maybe you really were just overthinking it.

"yeah... you're probably right," you admit, taking another bite.

"of course i am," he says, smug. "older sibling wisdom."

"you literally just told me some fake dating psychology."

"hey, it works for some people," he says, laughing.

you shake your head, but you're smiling now, too.

as you finish up dinner, the conversation drifts to other things— his work at the studio, how living in seoul is going so far, and what ridiculous thing he plans to waste money on next. (apparently, it's a limited-edition plushie he claims is an investment.)

you're now in your bed, freshly showered, hair still slightly damp against your pillow. staring at the ceiling, you replay the day in your head- you having fun with your new friends, the laughter at karaoke, and the small, nagging thought of leehan's. you just don't know why you wanted to be friends with him so bad. the day had felt both so long and short. sighing, you turn onto your side, reaching for the lamp beside you, and clicking it off.

the next few weeks and months follow the same routine. you've settled into your new school, growing comfortable with your routine. minji and moka have become your closest friends, the kind you can joke around with, text random topics to in ungodly hours, and count on to save you a seat during lunch. you've even managed to branch out a bit, making casual friends in other classes, effortlessly slipping into conversations and forming easy connections.

but the case with leehan? still the same. frozen.

you're still stuck in the same frustrating loop of forced interactions, half-hearted conversations, and long silences. you've been paired up with him for projects multiple times, and each time, it's a painfully dull experience. he never speaks unless spoken to, and even then, his responses are as dry as toast-short, flat, and uninteresting. if he ever does talk, it's out of necessity, like asking how to blend a color for an art project (since, unlike you, he's not exactly gifted in that league). and that's it. no banter, no effort to make things less awkward. it's not like you expect him to be a chatterbox, but come on, a little effort wouldn't kill him.

"hey, what do you think about adding some shadows here?" you ask during one of your art projects, pointing at a part of the sketch.

he shrugs. "looks fine."

you stare at him, waiting for more. anything more. but he just keeps painting, completely unbothered.

"okay, well... do you think we should use blue or purple for the background?"

"blue," he says simply, not even looking up.

he isn't rude, but not nice either. you sigh, dragging your brush across the palette. working with leehan is like texting someone who only replies with k. It's frustrating, and more than that, awkward.

it's not just during projects, either. whenever it's just the two of you left in the classroom, the silence is so heavy it feels like an actual thing, pressing against you, urging you to break it. and when you do, when you attempt small talk, ask about his hobbies, his music taste, just anything to spark a conversation, you always get the same dead responses.

"you know, i have a brother, and we liked watching basketball together. do you like any sports?"

"no."

"mhm, i see. well, do you have any pets? i have a pet goldfish in our house."

"yes."

"really? what is it?"

"the same. fish."

"what type of fish?"

"corydoras,"

at least he's honest, you cope.

that's how every conversation goes. it's like he's allergic to words longer than three syllables. and at first, you think, okay, maybe he's just like this with everyone. maybe he's one of those people who just doesn't like talking.

but you see stuffs, like how he laughs when he's with other people. how he's actually talking, laughing, contributing more than just a robotic "okay." he's not this indifferent with them. just with you.

and that's when it really starts to sink in.

it's not that leehan is quiet, or shy, or socially awkward.

he just does NOT want to talk to you.

that realization hits harder than you'd like to admit. you try to brush it off, tell yourself that not everyone has to like you, that it's fine, really. but the more you see him laughing with others, joking around, talking normally, the harder it becomes to ignore.

it's not that he struggles to make friends. he's just choosing not to be friends with you. and that affected you. not because it's leehan. it's because you had thing about being left hanging.

still, over time, you learn to accept it. some people just don't click, and leehan is clearly one of them. it's not like you need his approval. you have minji, moka, and a handful of other friends.

so you stop trying. stop initiating conversations. stop going out of your way to talk to him. and for a while, that worked.

then, something shifts

it's subtle at first, so subtle that you don't even notice it. but then minji nudges you during lunch, her voice dropping to a whisper

"hey," she says, leaning in. "i think leehan's staring at you."

you snort, not even bothering to look up. "yeah, right."

"no, really. he's been looking over here for, like, a solid minute."

you roll your eyes, but curiosity gets the better of you. when you glance up, leehan's gaze flicks away so fast it's almost unnoticeable.

you think about it for a second but ultimately shrug it off. it's not like it changes anything. he still doesn't talk to you. ye still keeps his distance. and you certainly aren't going to waste energy trying to break through his icy exterior again.

but you start to notice things, like how he stiffens whenever you walk past, his posture going unnaturally rigid. how he deliberately avoids eye contact, like meeting seeing your eyes might physically kill him. how, no matter what, he always seems aware of where you are in the room, never too close, but never completely out of reach.

it's weird. and, honestly, you're starting to think that maybe he just really hates you that much.

minji and moka notice it too.

"i swear, leehan is straight-up ignoring you," moka mutters one afternoon, barely paying attention to the notes she's supposed to be copying. "it's like you don't even exist to him."

you sigh, tapping your pen against your notebook. "whatever. it's not like it matters. as long as he cooperates when we have to work together, i couldn't care less."

minji hums thoughtfully. "or maybe... he likes you?"

you blink. "what?"

minji nods, looking more convinced by the second. "think about it, he's only like this with you. everyone else gets normal responses, but with you, it's like he forgets that he's a human being."

you stare at her, then at moka, waiting for her to back you up. but instead, she tilts her head, considering.

"actually... i don't think so." she suddenly snaps her fingers. "ah! remember park minju? that pretty girl from the next class?"

you frown. "what about her?"

"well, leehan had the biggest crush on her back in eighth grade. and when I say biggest, i mean biggest. he was, like, ridiculously obvious about it. everyone knew."

minji's eyes widen. "oh my god, you're right. he was so dramatic about it."

the two of them burst into laughter while you sit there, entirely unimpressed.

"wow," you deadpan. "so, basically, leehan just really, really doesn't like me."

moka smirks. "yeah, to the point where it's almost impressive. like, what did you do to him in a past life? he avoids you like a virus."

minji swats her playfully, but you just shake your head. "but yeah, if he likes you he'll be obvious about it."

confirmed. leehan hates your guts, for god knows what reason.

and with that, you decide you're done thinking about him. if he wants to pretend you don't exist, then fine.

the next few months, you ignored leehan completely. and, of course, he noticed.

at first, he didn't seem to mind, or at least, he pretended not to. but it didn't take long for moka and minji to catch on. from across the room, they could see it, the way leehan would glance at you when he thought no one was looking, his expression unreadable.

and then there were the times when you two ended up in the same group for another never-ending project. you would talk to everyone except him. it wasn't that you were mean about it, you were perfectly civil, but you just didn't acknowledge his presence. no eye contact. no small talk. nothing.

but leehan wasn't stupid. he could tell the difference between indifference and avoidance.

at some point, it must've started bothering him too, because moka and minji began whispering to each other every time they caught him hesitating, fidgeting like he was debating whether or not to approach you.

and, he almost did.

it was homeroom, and the teacher hadn't shown up. the class was in full chaos-desks rearranged, chairs turned backwards, students perched on tables, chatting and laughing. you sat comfortably in your usual spot with moka, sipping on jelly, while minji sat comfortably on moka's desk, the three of you bantering about something completely ridiculous.

you felt a presence behind you.

moka stopped mid-sentence, her eyes flickering up. minji did the same. then, she discreetly nudged your knee under the desk, her silent way of saying look behind you.

you turned your head slightly, just enough to catch a glimpse of leehan standing there.

your posture straightened instinctively, but you kept your expression neutral as you turned fully to face him.

his hands fidgeted at his sides, his lips parted slightly like he was rehearsing his words in his head. swallowing hard before speaking

"y/n, i just wanted to say tha-"

"HELLO, Y/N!"

a voice suddenly interrupted, cutting straight through the moment.

you blinked, turning your attention to the source, ham jinsik.

jinsik was, by all definitions, the classic popular guy. tall for his age, charming, effortlessly good-looking. he was the type of guy who never seemed to take anything too seriously, which was probably why he was grinning at you like he'd just won the lottery.

as leehan shifted, glancing over his shoulder, your eyes flicked from jinsik back to him, just in time to catch the way his expression dropped, just for a split second before he quickly looked away. retreating before he could even finish his sentence.

but before you could say anything, jinsik was already speaking.

"jinsik, hi! what's up?" you smiled, brushing aside the awkwardness of the moment.

behind you, moka and minji were losing their minds. they weren't even trying to be subtle, nudging each other aggressively while failing to hold back their giggles.

jinsik flashed you a sheepish grin. "i was wondering if you're free later? i mean..." he rubbed the back of his neck. "we're in the same group, right? and, uh, i could really use some help with the topic we're working on."

moka and minji's snickering worsened "sure, help".

you shot them a quick glare, swatting their knees in warning before nodding at the boy in front of you "of course, i'm down."

jinsik visibly relaxed, a small little yes slipping past his lips before he cleared his throat and tried to play it cool. "great! we can walk together after class. don't worry, i won't keep you out too late."

you laughed lightly. "alright."

as jinsik walked back to his group, who immediately started hyping him up, you finally turned back toward your own friends, rolling your eyes at moka and minji's exaggerated expressions.

but then you remembered.

leehan

you glanced back at him, half-expecting him to be looking in your direction, but he wasn't. he was sitting at his desk, chatting with the student in front of him like nothing had happened.

you exhaled, excused yourself, and walked toward his desk. "hey." you stopped beside him. "sorry about earlier. you were saying?"

leehan turned to you, blankly

whatever light that had been on his face while talking to his classmate disappeared, replaced by something colder. his lips pressed into a thin line, his shoulders tensing slightly.

"i forgot," he said flatly.

you blinked. "oh, okay then."

you didn't want to waste energy overthinking it, so you just hummed, nodded, and walked back to your seat.

what you didn't see, however, was leehan's gaze following you. nor did you notice the way his eyes flickered toward jinsik, his jaw tightening slightly, fingers clenching into a fist on his desk.

just like that, the days blurred together, and everything fell back into the usual routine.

middle school came to an end faster than you expected.

one moment, you were stressing over exams, avoiding unnecessary drama, and pretending not to notice the way leehan had stopped trying to talk to you. and the next? you were standing in a packed auditorium, surrounded by classmates who were buzzing with excitement and nerves.

the school hall was chaotic, students darting between friends, taking photos, and exchanging yearbooks filled with scribbled messages they'd probably cringe at in a few years. the air smelled like fresh paper, perfume, and faint traces of cafeteria food.

you were standing with moka and minji near the entrance, your neat uniform geeling slightly too tight but strangely comforting.

"so... where are you guys going for high school?" minji suddenly asked, fiddling with the hem of her blazer that she only wore properly today.

"seoul high school," you answered, adjusting your ribbon. "it's nearer to my place."

moka gasped dramatically, clutching your arm. "no way! that's where i'm going too!"

minji's eyes widened before she broke into a grin. "me too! do you think we'll end up in the same classes again?"

"i don't know,"you chuckled, feeling lighter than you had in months. "but at least we'll be at the same school. that's what matters."

moka sighed in relief. "good. i don't think i can handle high school alone."

"you? alone?" minji snorted. "you'd make friends in five minutes."

"that's not the point! you guys are my friends."

your heart warmed at that. as much as you teased each other, you knew moka meant it. and truthfully, so did you.

before you could respond, the speakers crackled to on, signaling the start of the ceremony. the noise in the hall gradually died down as students shuffled toward their assigned seats.

you exhaled, turning back to moka and minji with a smile. "i'll catch you guys around there."

and as you took your seat, listening to the opening speech, everything suddenly felt light. you glanced around the room, taking it all in.

you caught glimpses of familiar faces, some you'd just known this year, and some you barely spoke to but still felt a sense of connection with.

and then there was leehan.

he was a few rows ahead, sitting with his group of friends. he laughed at something one of them said, his usual easygoing smile in place. you preferred him like that, a human.

he didn't look in your direction.

you weren't sure if that was a good thing or not. but you pushed the thought aside. today wasn't about old tensions or unanswered what-ifs. it was about new beginnings. and, you'll leave hongik to a new school, a fresh start, and the comfort of knowing moka and minji would be there with you without leehan's heavy and contagious aura creeping around the corner.

because really, what were the odds that he would end up at the same high school as you?

at least, that's what you thought when 10th grade began.

seoul high school

you arrived at your new classroom earlier than most students, enjoying the quiet hum of the morning. the sun and streamed through the windows, reflecting soft lights against the wooden desks. the wind gusted from the open pane and slightly blew your now slightly longer hair that reached your shoulder. everything felt light and promising. as usual, you struck up conversations with a few early classmates, effortlessly easing into small talk. it was a good day. nothing could ruin it.

or so you thought.

because then, out of the corner of your eye, you caught a glimpse of someone standing at the doorway. and with how the room temperature suddenly dropped, you already knew.

kim leehan.

no way.

yes, kim leehan.

his hair was a lighter shade of brown now, and he'd grown taller, noticeably so. a lot can change in a year, but somehow, he hadn't. you found yourself staring at him, completely unaware that your gaze was practically burning a hole through his forehead already.

and yet, leehan barely reacted.

he met your eyes in a blink, nodding slightly before walking past you. bot a single change in expression. no surprise. no recognition beyond what seemed like just common courtesy.

and, of course, he settled into a seat at the very back of the classroom. a mile away from you. predictable.

your shoulders tensed as you quickly looked away, patting your hair into place as if that would somehow steady your thoughts.

"what the hell is he doing here?" you hissed under your breath.

a million possibilities ran through your mind. had he always planned to come to seoul high? did he know you'd be here? or was this some dumb fate?

it didn't matter.

you hesitated for a second. maybe this time would be different? maybe he'd actually talk to you? but the way he acted, or rather, his complete lack of one was all too familiar. it's still the same stern leehan from middle school, at least when it came to you.

you swallowed back whatever words had formed in your throat, pushing away the disappointment, and turned back to your desk.

you don't know what it is with you desperately wanting to figure leehan out, maybe because you're still left hanging without knowing why.

the classroom had started filling up, students pouring in with laughter and chatter, and you forced yourself to join in.

the girl sitting next to you introduced herself, and you made an effort to be friendly, though it didn't come as naturally as it did with moka and minji. speaking of them, they were five classrooms away down the hall, which meant you'd be sitting through long, exhausting classes alone, at least for now.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟  𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

"WHAT?!"

moka's shriek echoed through the cafeteria, loud enough to make half the students turn in your direction.

panicked, you lunged forward, clamping a hand over her mouth. "shut up," you hissed, glancing around as a few nosy students tried to eavesdrop.

moka peeled your hand off, her eyes still wide with pure disbelief. she leaned in, this time whispering harshly. "what?!"

you sighed, rubbing your temple. "yeah, he's in my class."

moka blinked at you, then at the ceiling, as if trying to process some kind of divine punishment. "no freaking way. out of all the high schools in seoul, and out of all the students... kim leehan?!" she shook her head. "that's terrifying."

"i know." you exhaled dramatically, slumping onto the table. "i didn't expect him to be here either."

moka crossed her arms. "and you're telling me we got separated, but you got stuck with him? this is the worst trade deal in history."

before you could respond, minji arrived, setting her tray of food down. "what are you guys talking about?"

moka wasted no time. "leehan is in y/n's class."

minji blinked. then-

"WHAT?!"

you and moka immediately reached over, swatting at her arms. "hey, shut up!" you whispered aggressively.

minji lowered her voice, but her eyes were just as wide. "wait, deadass? is this real?"

you sighed and nodded.

she hummed in thought. "ah, that explains it. i thought i saw a familiar back earlier, but i figured i was just hallucinating." she stabbed her food with a fork. "turns out, my nightmares are real."

moka shook her head in disbelief. "i mean, him being in the same high school? fine. but in the same class as y/n? that's like a match made in hell."

"a horror movie in the making," minji added.

"that time severus snape reincarnated as my classmate." moka laughed, as minji was enjoying it too. you rolled your eyes, reaching over to steal a chip from your friend's tray. "ha ha funny. let's not talk about it." but you admit, that was actually funny.

"we are talking about it," minji said, smacking your hand away from her chips. "how is he?"

you made a face. "what do you mean, how is he? he's the same leehan. acts like i carry the plague."

minji let out a long, unimpressed sigh. "figures."

"ugh, boooring." moka leaned back in her chair.

they both waved off the topic like it was a failed drama plot twist, swiftly moving on to minji's latest tragic news: taesan transferring to another school. minji whined about it for ten minutes straight while moka wordlessly devoured half her tray of food.

for a moment, you let yourself relax. laughing at their gossips, listening to minji's endless whining, watching moka inhale her meal like it was her last. everything felt normal.

then the bell rang, and just like that, it was back to reality.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

the days blurred into a familiar cycle: class, break time, dismissal, repeat. you sat through lectures, quietly counting the minutes until you could meet up with minji and moka.

and leehan still existed like some kind of background npc with an unskippable quest. he sat at the farthest corner of the room, never spoke to you, never looked at you, never acknowledged you unless absolutely necessary. his coldness was almost unreal at this point. good ol' days

it was still bothering you at first. the way he moved through the world like you were invisible. the way he nodded politely to everyone else but barely glanced in your direction.

then, you just stopped caring, like, for real this time.

you weren't enemies. you weren't friends. just civil. yet, you made little to no efforts to ask leehan what's wrong. maybe that was your mistake.

somewhere along the way, the irritation faded into indifference. the tension between you two solidified into an invisible wall neither of you had any intention of breaking.

this went on until the end of 12th grade.

to be continued ..

[lastoneout]

Sorry to put this screed on people's dashes again but also the thing that gets me is the whole "I believe it’s selfish to knowingly bring a child into the world who will suffer" thing 'cuz like...no one gets through life without suffering at some point?? Life isn't all sunshine and rainbows for anyone, even abled people. We all go through loss and grief and rejection, we all feel pain, we get bullied or embarrass ourselves, some of us will be abused and most of us will have relationships end in messy ways, we all have to come to terms with our own mortality no matter how scary it is, we get sick(and not just in disabled ways like broken arms and UTIs and the flu all SUCK), we all have to deal with not getting something we desperately want be it a job or acceptance into a college or an award or book deal, at some point we will simply not be enough and we just have to keep going, and like...maybe it's just me but I don't think all of that pain and discomfort negates all of the joy being alive can bring.

Like, I can't think too hard about knowing my partner will outlive me OR that I might outlive him because the thought of being without him or him being without me is absolutely devastating. I had a cancer scare in 2023 and I spent the week waiting for the test results sobbing because I felt so horrible for possibly leaving the man I love behind. But you know what I didn't do? Decide that pain meant I shouldn't be in a relationship. All of the joy completely outweighs the pain I know one of us will have to feel one day. And my fiance didn't leave me either, and I know he wouldn't give me up to avoid the pain of losing me either.

As another example, I lost my closest friend to leukemia in 2018. I have never felt pain like that before, I'd never lost anyone. And if I could go back to the day we met in High School I would never even consider deciding not to befriend him because I knew I would lose him and it would kill me. Or my dogs, they're both gone now, of cancer and old age, and I would adopt them again without a second thought, all of the joy they brought me was worth the unimaginable pain of losing them. I know my cat will die one day and I would adopt her all over again too, and one day I will adopt new pets, knowing they will die, and not caring because the time we will have together is more than enough.

There is not a single person or pet that I've lost that would make me second guess welcoming them into my life again. Hell I have NIGHTMARES about getting sent back to relive the last 15 years of my life because I would be scared to fuck up and miss out on my friends and adopting my pets and meeting the love of my life. The pain of missing those connections and having to live without ever having met them 100% outweighs the pain I will feel or have felt from losing them.

I know there are probably disabled people who are miserable enough they wish the had never been born, but overall disabled people love life more than any other group of people I've ever encountered. My illness has taken a lot from me. I can't go hiking anymore, and thus I can't fulfill my dream of doing the Rim to Rim hike at the Grand Canyon or to the peak of any of the mountains I live near. I had to quit my movie theater job even though I would have happily worked there for the rest of my life. I also can't be an ASL interpreter like I wanted because I can't stand for very long and I have dyslexia bad enough that finger spelling is basically impossible for me. I can't do yoga anymore even though I really enjoyed it. I would love to be a singer, but I was abused in ways that have given me debilitating stage freight and I truly don't know if I can ever get over it. I can't run through a field, I can't have a job, I can't drink anymore, I might never get to visit countless places on earth I'd love to go...and if I had the choice between never experiencing all of this pain and never being born I would pick the pain every single time.

Life is suffering, but it's also love, and joy, and fun, and so many other things. Even for disabled people, life is never just suffering. So who the fuck are these people to decide that we don't deserve to experience the happiness life has to offer us all because we might suffer at some point in a way an abled person wouldn't?? I don't think these people would agree that knowing neither you nor your partner will live forever means you shouldn't get married. They probably don't think knowing your pets will die one day means you shouldn't adopt them. I don't think they would not have kids because those kids will experience a breakup or losing a pet or getting sick or any of the little moments of pain we all go through.

I saw so many people in the comments insist that a disabled loved one clearly suffered constantly and never felt any joy, or if they did it "wasn't enough for it to be worth it" and so that means they should have never been born, and again I have to ask, who the fuck are you to decide that that person's life wasn't worth living? Did you ask them? Or did you just assume because you can't imagine living like that? It's not your fucking life. You don't get to decide that for someone else, and the fact that you're trying to means you do not view disabled people as people. You see them as mistakes. And I'm sorry, but I have absolutely no interest in being around someone who looks at me and people like me and sees a tragedy instead of a person.

Neanderthals and early humans cared for their disabled, they knew our lives were worth it and put in the work to make us happy and comfortable because they loved us. I won't lie and say caring for us is always easy or that modern society doesn't make it so much harder than it needs to be(I s2g the people who were like "well money tho" and I'm like that's a capitalism problem not a fucking disabled person problem), but if people who didn't even have agriculture believed our lives were worth saving I don't know why the fuck modern humans can't at the very least do the same.

(Also ngl the whole "raising a kid like that is selfish" thing kinda makes it sound like she's in favor of "mercy" killing disabled babies so like. Hope that was a fucking poor choice of words and not something she actually believes!)

the internet is fun sometimes but other times you see an AITA where someone is saying they think it's wrong for people with inheritable genetic conditions to have kids because it's cruel and selfish to bring a child into the world if you know they could suffer and while I typically would not wish harm on another person I start thinking that maybe Dorothy Golden Girls was right about some people needing to become very sick and very scared at least once in their lives so they can realize exactly what it's like to live in a world where people think you should have been killed as a baby to spare you and the people in your life the burden of having to deal with a disabled person existing near them and needing their help and also that you're a selfish monster for having kids

[paradisedumpling]

Rosy Cheeks and Warm Jackets

TROPE: highschool!au; quarterback!minji x cheerleader!reader

CONTENT WARNING: swearing; men being creepy but it's nothing too much; minor insecurities

SYNOPSIS: maybe confessing to your crush wouldn't end bad after all

A/N: hello! if you feel like you've seen this before, you probably have. this is a repost from my old blog, enjoy!

────────────────────────────

You turned around as loud whistles resonated within the school halls. The football team walked down with pride in each of their steps. Have won a very important game just the day before, who wouldn't?

You yourself had a small proud smile on your face as people cheered on them. Being part of the cheer squad, you knew a big part of the win was also yours and it made you happy to know everyone's spirits seemed to be high after yesterday's game.

And because you were a cheerleader, you knew the football team personally, even going as far as to say you had friends in there. Although with being a very shy person, you were only really close with a few of your teammates. But your nice personality and popularity by simply being in the cheer squad managed to have you know a lot of people, despite your shyness.

A familiar loud bickering averted your attention from the overall image of the football team to two specific girls upfront, walking between and ahead of the entire team with big smiles on their faces; Kim Minji and Pham Hanni, the star duo of the football team.

You knew the two best friends not only from the games, but also from being in the same year and class as them and because Hanni was your best friend Danielle's girlfriend. You all hangout in the same group most of the time, but your shyness forbid you from getting too close with the duo.

Your eyes finally settled on the quarterback of the team, Minji. Tall, beautiful, easy-going, gorgeous, funny, pretty, talented at everything she touches. Minji was the definition of perfection, if someone was ever to ask you to define it. And she wasn't a mean person or thought of herself as above others, as the perfect girl in every movie did. No. That's what made her even more perfect in your opinion. Minji was perfection, the perfect one. And you wouldn't lie if you said she makes your heart skip a few beats everytime you see her or hear her voice.

It had been like that for a while, too. You and Minji had shared classes for as long as you can remember. The two of you always being in the same friend groups and were always at each others birthday parties, but you never got closer than that. You only came to share phone numbers after you got into the cheer squad. Still, Minji seemed to have always captured your heart. Since the moment you two met in kindergarten when you lost your figurine in the playground and she was the only kid who helped you find it, to all the moments you hangout together with your friends today and she buys you your favorite slushie even though she never asked your favorite before.

"Take a picture so it lasts longer." A voice beside you startled you, making you jump and turn around with a blush on your cheeks.

Kang Haerin, your best friend and a cheerleader, stood by your side as she eyed you with an annoyed expression. Haerin was the only close friend you had that knew about your not so small crush on the quarterback. Not that you didn't trust your other friends, but Danielle would eventually spill it to her girlfriend accidentally and Hyein would try to set you two together in a very obvious way. So it was better this way.

"Shut up!" You turned around, closing your locker and grabbing her arm to start walking towards Danielle's locker, face not looking at the football star players direction anymore knowing they were also going in that direction. "And I don't want to hear a word about it."

"I wasn't even going to say anything." You stopped to look at her, raising your eyebrow. She had a grin in the corner of her lips, eyes darting around as she faked uninterest. You scoffed, rolling your eyes and tugging her arm again.

"Hey, girls!" Danielle greeted you two as you approached her. You and Haerin said your greetings before she was engulfed in a hug by a certain football player. "Baby!"

You watched in amusiment as the couple greeted each other and shared affection as if they haven't seen each other in ages. A giggle left your lips once you heard Haerin gagging at your side. "I'm gonna look for Hyein." You nodded, still watching the couple, this time with longness in your eyes.

"They're so gross, ew." You turned to your side to be faced with Minji, a face of disgust directed at your friends actions. "Don't you think?" Your eyes widened as she turned to you, catching you looking at her.

She smiled down at you, giggling at your surprised expression. You only nodded, cheeks blushing a light red as you stared at Minji's eyes.

"Good morning, Minji-ah." You greeted shyly, eyes darting down to look at the books in your arms, clutching them tightly to your chest. "You did great yesterday."

"If it wasn't for your cheering, I wouldn't have gotten the energy to win the game." Your face got impossibly redder and you didn't knew if she was laughing at you or not, but you would never complain about hearing her laugh. "You're cute when–"

"There's our star player!" Minji was cut off by a loud voice and a smack on her shoulder. You both turned to look as a tall boy smiled at her with pride, you trying to calm your racing heart as you caught Minji's attempt of complimenting you. "You were seriously amazing yesterday! We need to have more practices together cuz I have to learn that thing you did to get us the match point!" You watched as he excitedly engaged into a conversation with Minji, who simply nodded and smiled at him.

The boy was none other than Choi Yeonjun, the captain of the masculine football team and a starting eleven player. You.... were very acquainted with Yeonjun, if you could call it that. Yeonjun was the type of person that knew everyone in and out of school. He was very popular and social and it wasn't uncommon for him to hop between friends in the school halls. Still, he had his group of close friends. And one of his friends, Huening Kai, a tennis player in your school, had a younger sister who you were friends with, Huening Bahiyyih. One time last year she invited you to their beach house for a gathering with a few athletes in the school, and Yeonjun was there. You didn't interact much at the beginning, but after Bahiyyih dragged you to dance one night you seemed to have caught his eyes. For the remaining time at the beach house he openly flirted with you and tried to get you to go on a date with him, but you always turned him down. After all, you had eyes for another football player. But that didn't prove much efficient as to this day he still tries to date you.

"And when you grabbed the ball and started running–" Yeonjun's eyes flickered towards you for a slip second as he was passionately talking about yesterday's game with Minji and he finally seemed to notice there was somebody else with her before he approached, you couldn't decipher if he had also seen Hanni and Danielle making out behind the three of you or not. He faltered in his speech as he stopped to check you out and you suddenly became very conscious of the revealing cheer uniform you were wearing. "Oh, hey there, girl. I didn't see you before, sorry." You tightened your grip on your books, smiling politely at him. You shifted uncomfortably as he bluntly checked you out. "Nice fit."

"Thanks." You mumbled with a tight smile, bringing a hand down to pull your skirt down. It wouldn't do anything, but it was an effort. You mentally cursed yourself for not coming with a pair of sweatpants like Haerin and Danielle did. You see, you normally don't wear your uniform around school like that, unless you have practice before class or on your last period while the other students have P.E class. But as per tradition, you always take a group photo after big games. Yesterday you couldn't because of the after party so you were going to take it today during lunch time, and your coach insisted you all came with your uniforms so it wouldn't take too long. You were not expecting to deal with Yeonjun or any other of your admires before you could change to your normal clothes though.

"So." Minji cleared her throat, eyeing Yeonjun with disgust as she leaned closer to you and wrapped her arm around your shoulders. That seemed to snap Yeonjun's eyes from your exposed legs. "We can talk with our coaches about the joined practice later, right?" Yeonjun nodded as he eyed Minji's arm around you, blinking a few times before he looked up to look at her in the eye, a bright smile on his lips.

"Totally!" He put his hands on his jacket's pockets, standing carelessly as if the action didn't affect him, but both you and Minji knew it did.

"Great!" She smiled at him and if you were looking you'd see the threat in her eyes. "We have to go fetch the other girls right now, if you don't mind. See you later!" Not giving him any time to reply, she grabbed Hanni by the back of her collar and started dragging her away, gently rubbing your shoulder and ushering Danielle. "Come on Dani, before Haerin let's Hyein buy that gross candy again."

"Damn bro, no need to choke me." Minji let go of Hanni when you were far away enough from Yeonjun and you watched the poor girl rub her neck as she stared at Minji judgely. "What was that for?" Hanni asked, wrapping her arm around Danielle's waist as the four of you walked towards the interior court where you knew Haerin and Hyein were.

But the oldest girl simply ignored her best friend. Instead, she turned to you, gently whispering in your ear. "Are you okay?"

You nodded, blushing at her breath on your ear. "Yeah, thanks." You sighed, looking down at your exposed legs and arms. Probably the only thing you hated about cheerleading was the summer uniforms. "I should've come with leggings or something at least, that's on me. Sorry." You looked up as you apologized, staring into her beautiful eyes that held nothing but concern. You didn't fail to notice the pout on her lips.

"It's his fault for being a creepy perv, not yours." She grumbled, arms pulling you closer as she practically hugged you to her chest. Suddenly, her eyes light up as she let go of you. You couldn't help the pang in your chest as she did so. "Here." She started taking her varsity jacket off and you eyed her with curiosity. "It's not much but I hope it helps." Your eyes widened once you realized what she was doing and you couldn't help the blush on your cheeks as she gently helped you put her varsity jacket on. Minji smiled proudly as she stared at you.

"Thanks, Min." You smiled shyly at her, averting your gaze and missing how her eyes softened at the nickname.

Minji didn't put her arm back around your shoulders as the four of you continued on your way to meet up with the rest of your friends, but she remained close and kept an eye for anyone else glaring at you.

Finally, you reached the interior court. "There they are!" Danielle pointed to your usual corner, where you could clearly see the two bickering about something. You let a small smile rest on your face as you watched them, shaking your head as you approached calmly.

"Unnies!" Hyein jumped as she saw you four approaching, running to grab you by your hand and drag you to where she previously was. "Can you help me with my arts homework? I forgot to do it yesterday and Haerin doesn't want to help me." She pouted, looking at you with pleading eyes.

"You know your teacher will eventually realize I'm the one doing your homeworks, right?" You sighed as you sat down beside Haerin, waiting for Hyein to hand you her homework.

Danielle and Hanni came to sit behind you three, engaging into a conversation with Minji, said girl remained standing and she put one of her feet on the bench on the other side of Haerin for support and crossed her arms on her chest. You momentarily lost yourself as you watched her laugh at whatever nonsense Hanni said, her head falling back as her eyes grew into crescent moons. God, she's beautiful.

"Here, unnie!" You turned to Hyein, trying not to blush as your eyes came down to your lap to scan her homework.

You two quietly worked on her homework as your other friends chatted. It wasn't an uncommon dynamic for all of you. Hyein was smart and dedicated, but she often used her status as youngest in the group to have any of you help her with her homeworks. In her words "Since you already did it before, it should be easy right?" And it normally was. None of you ever minded helping each other with anything. But the lingering perfume on Minji's jacket had your mind wandering more times than you'd like to and you took longer to complete Hyein's homework than you do on other days.

After you finally finished it and let the girl to gather her things in her backpack, you grabbed your cellphone to look at the time. You only had fifteen minutes before your classes begin, so you turned to the chatting girls as they seemed too engaged into their conversation to notice the time passing.

Your eyes darted between the two football players and your cheermates, feeling too shy to abruptly interrupt their conversation. So, you eyed Danielle. You tapped her leg, leaning closer as she turned to you confused. "We need to go, class is about to begin." Her mouth gained a oval shaped and she nodded, smiling at you and patting your head.

You watched with slightly flushed cheeks as she warned the other girls and you all got up to walk to class, Minji and Hanni still engaged into their conversation as you made your way out of the internal court.

Once you were approaching the point were you'd all split up to go to your perspective classrooms, Haerin pulled you back by the arm. You eyed her with confusion as she stared at you amused. "What?"

"What?" She mocked, looking down at your torso. You eyebrows furrowed deeply as you looked down, blushing in realization as you took notice of Minji's jacket, not that you ever forgot it was there. "What happened while I was gone?" She wiggled her eyebrows at you, quietly giggling at the blush spreading all over your face.

"Shut up, Rinnie!" You shushed her, looking away at anything but her face and the quarterback walking in front of you two. "Yeonjun was flirting with me again." You heard her groaning and you could imagine the immense eye roll she did. "Minji was simply trying to make me comfortable because I'm stupid and forgot pants."

"I knew I should've brought spares." She mumbled, cursing Yeonjun under her breath as you approached the hall where all of you parted ways.

You watched as Hanni and Danielle kissed and hugged goodbye, turning to give your own hug to Hyein. The younger girl waved to you all before skipping down towards her classroom and you waived to Danielle as she went on her own way too.

"I swear if that asshole–" Haerin still mumbled and you couldn't help but giggle at your friend's protectiveness. You pulled her into a hug, shushing her as she realized you had all stopped walking and Hyein and Danielle were already gone.

"I'm okay, Rinnie. Don't worry." You whispered in her ear, pulling back to give her a smile. That seemed to calm her down enough as she waved to Minji and Hanni and hurried towards her classroom.

"Why is everyone so grumpy today, man?" Hanni asked as she pulled you to stand between her and Minji, the three of you walking calmly to your own classroom. "First Minji and now Haerin. Is the water tasting like shit again?"

"Stop being gross!" Minji returned grumpily and you giggled as Hanni looked at you with an 'I told you so' face.

"Stop being a dick!" You laughed as the duo kept on bickering all the way to your class and in your tables, shaking your head.

"I'm not being a dick, you ass–"

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"Alright girls, take five!" You heard Danielle groan in relief as Chaewon, the cheer captain, announced the break.

You and the rest of the cheerleaders have been practicing for a few hours now, the new routine being a bit more tiring than the ones you've been doing for the past few months. Theoretically, you all had a break until next week due to the win in the game the day prior. But your coach wasn't satisfied with your performance this season and she wanted to polish your routines as soon as possible, so here you all were practicing.

You walked towards the bench and grabbed your water bottle, quietly laughing as Danielle and Hyein laid down on the floor with wet cloaks on their foreheads. Haerin came up to the three of you and sat down on the bench, taking the bottle from your hands before you had a chance to take a sip of it. "Hey!"

"Not my fault you're busy staring at other people." She teased, laughing at your annoyed face before downing the water.

"Don't you do the same?" Hyein asked, looking at you two with a tired face. You smiled sympathetically at her, walking to crouch down besides her head and brush the hair sticking on her face due to the sweat away.

"That's why I can comment on it." Haerin replied, tossing you the water bottle. You grabbed it with a yelp, scolding her for not warning you beforehand. "At least I talk to Minji instead of just staring." She mumbled, trying to hide her smirk as you looked at her with disbelief.

"What did you say?" Danielle asked, opening her eyes to look at the three of you with curiosity. "I didn't hear it."

"She said nothing." You glared at Haerin, silently daring her to repeat her words. She looked away, pretending to be interested in something else. "Anyways." You turned to Danielle, standing up and drinking your water. "What are you guys doing tonight? It's Friday."

"Oh! I'm going on a date with Hanni tonight!" Danielle's energy suddenly came back as she sat up quickly, the cloak falling from her forehead. But she didn't seem to mind as her smile only grew bigger, her eyes staring at the sky as she seemed to be getting lost in her own head. "She said there's this nice restaurant she's going to take me!" Her voice was dreamy and you smiled longingly as your friend kept talking. "And then later we're going to my house and watch some movies!"

"I have homework to do." Hyein groaned loudly and you all laughed as you watched her annoyed face. "Why do they give us so much homework?"

"Welcome to highschool." You, Danielle and Haerin groaned, rolling your eyes. "Good luck, Hyennie." Hyein whined at your guys words, pouting.

"I'm going to the cinema with my mom and my sister." Haerin said her plans for the night, getting up from the bench. "But we'll probably have dinner somewhere before too." She walked up to Danielle as you could see Chaewon and your coach slowly gathering the other cheerleaders. "We might run into each other if I'm lucky." She told Danielle with a sly grin as she helped the older girl stand up.

"Oh please no." You laughed at Danielle as you helped Hyein get up. "The last time you guys crashed my date it didn't end up well." The australian's eyes widened in fear as she remembered the fateful date.

"It wasn't that bad." Hyein said as you three tired not to laugh at Danielle's expression of disbelief. "We just got banned from that dinner for what? Three months? Nothing serious."

"You embarrassed me in front of my girlfriend!" Danielle exclaimed as you started to walk back to the middle of the court, hands going up as her body expressed her emotions. "And that was Hanni's favorite place too! She was so sad." The girl pouted and Haerin and Hyein laughed at her as you laid a hand on her shoulder sympathetically.

"We apologized and she said is all good now." You tired to comfort your friend, glaring at the two youngests that kept laughing. "She laughs everytime someone mentions it even."

"You're right." Danielle smiled, nodding and turning to face you. "What about you? You were the only one that didn't say what you're going to do tonight."

"Oh." You blinked at her, shrugging as you turned to your captain. "I'll probably just go home and do nothing important."

"You should go out with Minji." You choked on your own spit as the words left Danielle's mouth, turning to look at her with an evident blush rising on your face. "She's not doing anything as far as I know and neither is you, it's a perfect idea." You looked at Haerin behind her with wide eyes, silently asking her if she told the australian anything about your crush on Minji, but she seemed as surprised as you were.

"W-Why?" You cursed yourself mentally for stuttering, looking away so Danielle wouldn't see the embarrassment and shyness in your face.

"Because you're friends and you both have nothing to do on a Friday night?" You were glad she sounded genuinely confused at your question, but you couldn't help fear that she had figured out you liked Minji. You loved and trusted Danielle with your life, but if Hanni and Hyein ever found out about your crush the three of them would become the most obvious and chaotic cupids to date. And that thought horrified you. Minji deserved someone social and cool, and you didn't want to ruin your entire friend group's friendship over a stupid crush you had on the quarterback.

"We'll talk about this later." You mumbled, straightening you back as your coach yelled that the break was over.

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You sighed as you tied your shoes, feeling relaxed after a cold shower in the locker rooms. Practice ended about an hour ago and you took your sweet time showering and dressing up. Haerin and Hyein had already left, the younger taking the opportunity to take a ride with the catlike girl. Danielle on the other hand, was still putting her shirt on by your side in front of her locker.

Talking about the australian girl. "Dani!" Kazuha, one of your cheer mates, yelled to your friend, making the girl turn around while she pulled her shirt down her torso. You simply resorted to finishing putting your shoes on. "Hanni's here!" Your friend squealed in excitement and you giggled at her, shaking your head.

You tuned their conversation off, shifting your attention to a certain quarterback that seemed to always plague your mind. You clutched Minji's varsity jacket to your chest as you finished tying your shoes, a small smile resting on your lips as you reminisced about how beautiful she looked during class, laughing at whatever nonsense your classmates and Hanni said. You brought the jacket to partially hide your face when your memories brought you to a moment during bio class where the teacher assigned you all a group activity and as per tradition at this point, the football players and the cheerleaders stick together on the same group. Yunjin, a football player, was blocking your way towards your seat and she was so engaged into the activity with Kazuha that you felt too shy to ask her to move, so you waited patiently behind her. But Minji noticed you behind her and instead of asking Yunjin to move, she lifted you up so you could pass above the tables instead. To say you were a blushing mess after that was an understatement, and to make matters worse for you, or better, Minji kept an arm around your waist during the entire class, always smiling down at you and giggling at your rosy cheeks. Gosh, you loved that girl.

"I hope you're thinking about me." You jumped startled, hand gripping on the jacket as whoever just spoke to you giggled at your reaction. You looked up to see Minji looking down at you with her beautiful smile, eyebrows quirking up as you finally knowledged her. "Hi, cutie."

"Hey, Min. What are you doing here?" You smiled at her, fighting back your blush as you got up and put the jacket in your hands on, finally noticing how quiet the lockers room had gotten. The others must've already left, but you didn't want to tear your eyes from the football player in front of you.

"I'm giving a ride to the girls for their date, so we came to pick Dani up." You nodded and your eyes locked for a few seconds, before you averted your gaze and went to grab your gym and school bags. "Are you going somewhere tonight too? I can give you a ride if you want."

"Oh, it's okay." You shaked your heard, looking away to see Danielle and Hanni in their own little world, giggling with each other. "I'll just go home and figure out what I'll have for dinner because no one's home for a while and there's nothing in the fridge..." You accidentally rambled, trailing off as you caught Minji smiling at you.

"Wanna go out?" You blinked at her question. Was she asking you on a date? I mean of course not, why would she? She's just asking her friend to go out because you have nothing to do and she has nothing to do so she must want to go out with her friend. Just that. Nothing else. Of course Minji wouldn't be asking you on a date why would she– "Hello? You're cute when you get lost in your head like that." She giggled and you were certain your entire face was very red.

"What?! I am not!" You playfully slapped her shoulder, leaning into her as you both laughed, you more because of embarrassment than anything else.

"So." She held your waist with one hand, brushing a few strands of hair from your face with the other. "Wanna go out? We can go that convinience store close to my grandparents' house." Your eyes lit up at that. That convenience store was one you'd go often when you were kids to buy ice cream and watch cartoons because her grandparents never let you watch them at their house.

"I would love to!" You smiled a her, big and genuine. Minji smiled down at you, caressing your cheek as she nodded. "How have they been, by the way? I haven't seen them in so long!"

"They ask about you a lot, actually." You looked at her in surprise and she only nodded, giggling. "You know they love you." You shaked your head at that, blushing slightly. "My parents miss you too. You should come over more often, I feel like we barely talk outside school or when we are not with the girls." You nodded, feeling a bit guilty. You wouldn't lie in saying that your crush had strained your friendship with the girl because of your shyness around her. But you were glad she wanted to see you more often.

Before you could engage deeper into your conversation, Hanni and Danielle came up to you two holding hands and with big smiles on their faces. "Dani's ready to go. Oh hey, you're here too." You waved at Hanni, smiling at your friends happiness. "Let's go, Minji. We have reservations, we can't be late."

"Ready to go?" Minji looked at you and you nodded. The quarterback smiled and laced her arms with yours, starting to walk away with the couple to the parking lot.

"Oh, you told her about my idea from earlier?" Danielle asked as she noticed you were following them to Minji's car.

"What idea?" Minji and Hanni looked between the two of you with curiosity and you couldn't help but look down embarrassed.

"Nothing–"

"She had just said she would be doing nothing tonight so I suggested she should go out with Minji since she was also doing nothing tonight." Danielle cut you off before you could dismiss her and you were glad it was dark otherwise as Minji looked down at you with amusement she would've seen the blush spreading over your cheeks.

"Seems like us going out today was destiny." She said in a deep voice, pulling you closer and giggling at you before she let go of your arm to round the car and go towards the driver's seat. "Which means... she's taking the front seat!" She glanced at Hanni who was about to open the passenger's seat door.

"Why?!" You and Danielle muffled your laughs at the girl's genuine offense. "You ask her out once and now she has passenger princess privileges?" Hanni huffed as she walked to the backseat with her girlfriend, closing the door behind her a bit harsher. "I thought we were mates, bro." She continued complaining as you all got inside Minji's car, buckling up before the older girl started the vehicle.

"Shut up and enjoy your free ride, Hanni." Minji shaked her head, giving you an reassuring smile as she saw you were feeling a bit panicked by Hanni's reaction. "She's just being dramatic, don't worry." She whispered to you before turning to face the street.

After turning on the radio, you all fell into a comfortable ambience as the couple in the backseats talked about their plans for the night, while you and Minji silently laughed, teasing them every once in a while for good laughs.

When Minji parked in front of the restaurant Hanni and Danielle would be having dinner at, she opened the window and peaked her head outside to look at the couple getting out of the car. "Remember to call your parents when you get home!" She said as she looked at Hanni, pointing an accusing finger at her. "I don't want your mom at my door at 3AM again because you forgot to text her you got at mine's safely!"

"Damn bro, that happened once!" Hanni mumbled angrily, having a bickery staring contest with Minji before Danielle broke it with a quiet laugh.

"We will, unnie. Don't worry." Danielle smiled, lacing her fingers with Hanni's. "Have a good night you two!" They waved at you two goodbye, and you turned to Minji as she mumbled.

"It was three times, actually." You giggled, and looked around faking uninterest as Minji looked at you puzzled. "Well... Shall we go to our date now?"

"Y-Yes!" You squealed, face becoming more red as Minji laughed at you. You were rigid in your seat as her hand lightly squeeze yours in your lap before shifting the gear from parked to begin driving away from the restaurant.

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"I think I'll just have these." You handed Minji the items you wanted to buy from the convinience store: two tuna onigiris, a strawberry sandwich and a bottle of strawberry juice. The girl put the items in the basket she had looped on her arm, smiling at you sweetly. "Are we going to eat here or on your car?"

"Actually, I was thinking–" But before Minji could finish her phrase, she was interrupted by the sound of your phone ringing in the pocket of her jacket you were still wearing.

You smiled at her apologetically before grabbing your phone, looking at the familiar name popping on the screen. "Oh, it's Haerin." You were a bit confused on why the girl was calling you so late at night without warning, but you brushed it off remembering she had gone to the cinema and was either excited about it or bored by it.

"You should pick it up, Haerin doesn't usually call people." You nodded, knowing very well all the habits of your best friend. You once again smiled apologetically at Minji, but she simply gave you a sweet smile. "I'll finish grabbing my things and meet you outside?"

"Thank you, you're amazing." Wanting to rush out and answer Haerin's call before it went to voicemail, you stood on your tiptoes and kissed Minji on her right cheek as another thanks before rushing out of the store and answering the call. "What's up, Rin?"

"The movie was good but now mom's complaining about how it wasn't 'real' and now I'm annoyed, so I decided to annoy you too. What are you doing?" You laughed at her annoyed tone, pulling the jacket tight around your torso as a chilly breezy ran past you.

"Out with Min." You giggled at Haerin's loud gasp, feeling the warm on your cheeks, but you told yourself it was because you were cold. "She invited me to go to a convinience store close to her grandparents house. And don't be weird about it! We used to come here as kids."

"What happened after I left?!" The annoyance she had seconds ago was long gone and that made you laugh at her, lightly pacing back and forth on your reels to warm your body a little. "So, have you two kissed yet?"

"Shut up!" The warm on your neck was definitely not from the cold and you had to bite your lower lip to stop yourself from smiling at the thought of kissing the quarterback. "It's a totally platonic outting. Nothing else. And stop being weird."

"Dude, you're so dense it's frustrating sometimes." You could hear the roll of her eyes in her voice and that made your eyes roll too. "Just tell her you like her already!"

"Stop!" You squealed, looking back afraid Minji might be near, but you saw her attentively looking through the freezer for something to drink. She looked cute. "She doesn't feel the same anyways, so there's no need for that."

"You don't know it until you confess!" You rolled your eyes once again, sighing in annoyance. "Come on! Don't be a coward for once!"

"Why are you so insisted on this? Can't I just like her from afar?" You could never understand why Haerin was so insisted on making you confess to Minji. Was it so hard for her to understand the football star would never return your feelings for her?

"No, you can't!" The girl groaned on the other side of the line and you heard some movement before she spoke again. "Use this date as an opportunity to finally bitchen up and tell her you like her! What's the worse that could happen?"

"Lose Minji's friendship?" You said that like it was the most obvious thing ever, frustration starting to build up in your chest. "Which I already am by the way, because I'm a stupid coward."

"Then stop being one!"

"Can you stop instigating me for once, Kang Haerin?!" Your voice raised a little, gripping your phone as your fear of rejection surfaced from the depths of your heart. "I'm not telling Minji I like her! End of story!" There was a loud groan from the other side of the line and you where about to tell her you wouldn't do what she wanted you to once again when a voice from behind you stopped you from doing so.

"You like me?"

Your eyes widened, body going rigid as Minji walked in front of you, looking you direct in the eyes. Suddenly, the firm grip you had on your cellphone loosened and your phone slowly fell from your hands. The loud sound it made as it hit the floor made you jump a little, but you didn't move to pick it up. You didn't blink as Minji eyes stared deeply into your own. You could feel your entire face going red and your hands start to shake from fear. This was it. The secret was out. She was going to reject you and you were going to loose one of your closest and best friends and she was going to–

"Why didn't you tell me before, silly?" She laughed. Minji laughed. Her eyes were crescent moons, just like they always were when she was happy. You'd know that much, you're always staring at her. And she had a faint blush on her cheeks. You were confused, and still locked in place. "Oh, darling." She stepped close to you, her voice dropping two octaves, making goosebumps go through your entire body. She brought both of her hands to your cheeks, gently caressing them. You couldn't get any redder than this. "You're cute when you're blushing."

"M-Minji I- What are you doing?" You said in a whisper, gulping down as her body was practically flush to yours. You could feel her warm breath hitting your face.

"Can I kiss you, cutie?" Your eyes went wide at that and your vision became a bit blurry. Your breath got stuck in your throat and you nodded eagerly before your hazy mind could understand what you were doing.

Minji giggled at the confused and awestruck state you were in, before looking down at your lips and leaning in, the phone on the floor long forgotten by both of you.

Your mind went blank before beginning to register things again. Minji's lips were soft and a bit cold, but they felt so incredibly good. They tasted faintly like the milk chocolate you knew she loved. You took a few seconds to relax from the shock, closing your eyes and sighing into her lips before wrapping your hands around her neck. You felt Minji smile into your lips before she let one hand go of your cheek, pulling your closer to her by the waist and deepening the kiss.

You both pulled back when air was needed and you rested your head on her shoulder, giggling quietly as she gently caressed your back.

"I like you so much." You pulled back just enough to look at her, your eyes shining with love as you bit your lips in slight shyness from her affectionate gaze.

"I think I've liked you since I met you, Minji." You took all of your courage to say that confidently, smiling brightly at her as she smiled back at you.

"Hmm, that's good." She mumbled, leaning in smiling before she captured your lips on hers once again. You were already getting addicted to the feeling of them.

This time, you were both interrupted by your phone ringing, Haerin's familiar ringtone making you remember your phone.

You pulled back with a quiet 'Sorry', crouching down to pick your phone up, that was luckily not broken, and quickly texted your best friend that your data was almost over and you'd talk to her later. You looked back at Minji, suddenly feeling shy under her sweet gaze that held a new meaning in your eyes and heart.

"So, wanna take this date to somewhere else? I don't wanna ask you to be my girlfriend in front of a convinience store." She eyed the glass sliding doors with an awkward smile, but your mind focused on something else. Girlfriend... Minji wanted to be your girlfriend. Holy shit Minji liked you! "Baby? Let's go?"

"Yes!" You squealed at the pet name, blushing brightly as she giggled and grabbed your hand, dragging you towards her parked car.

"By the way." She turned to look at you once you stopped in front of the passenger's seat, looking down at you with a sweet but mischievous smile. "You look very cute and hot wearing my football jacket."

"Kim Minji!" You squealed in disbelief as she rounded the car laughing loudly.

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You closed your locker with a sigh, turning to face Danielle and Haerin as a few of your cheermates bid you goodbye. It was Monday again and the three of you had just changed your cheer clothes from practice before classes to your normal school ones.

"What is taking Hyein so long?" The australian mumbled, looping her arms around both yours and Haerin's arms to begin leading you towards the youngest's locker.

A few of the students waved at you three, but everyone seemed to be in their own little world. It was Monday, and most of the clubs were on a small break, so the mood around the school was a bit more chill than usual. And no sight of the two football star players like you used to see every morning.

You spotted the tall, but young girl you were looking for speaking to a few of her classmates. When she spotted you three, she waved and smiled brightly. But wishing to let Hyein speak patiently to her classmates, you pulled Danielle back to slow her pace and allow the three of you to walk slowly towards the younger girl.

Once you were close to reaching her, a loud voice seethed through the peaceful atmosphere of the hallway calling out your name. "Hey! Wait!" You looked back confused, letting go of Danielle's arm to be greeted with the sight of Yeonjun running in your direction with a football in his hands.

"Oh, hey. Good morning, Yeonjun." You gave the boy a tight but polite smile, grateful that this time you were wearing clothes that covered your body. You could feel Haerin's intense gaze at him from behind you. "You seem excited."

"I heard we'll have a joined practice tomorrow!" You nodded, folding your arms in front of your torso as you hugged yourself, starting to feel uncomfortable under his intense gaze. You might not be wearing revealing clothes, but the way his eyes traveled down your body made you feel exposed just as much. "So, I was wondering if you'd like to go out with me after it." You blinked at him, not failing to hear the growl Haerin let out from behind you.

"Yeonjun..." Your voice was serious, and a bit annoyed if you were being honest, but you remained your politeness, feeling shy about making a fuss in front of so many people. "No. You know I don't see you like that."

"Just give me a chance!" He slapped his ball in frustration, looking pleadingly in your eyes. "Why not?!"

"Because she doesn't want to!" Haerin angrily answered for you. You turned to give her a stern look, turning back once again to look at Yeonjun, feeling small but annoyed under his gaze.

"I don't like you like that, Yeonjun." You sighed frustrated, fingers slightly fidgeting with the necklace you had under your shirt. "Besides, I'm not even sin–"

"Hey, babe." Familiar arms looped around your waist, a sweet kiss being planted on your cheeks as a big smile immediately formed on your lips. "Good morning."

You turned to look at your girlfriend Minji, standing on your tiptoes to give her a sweet kiss on her lips. "Good morning, baby. How are you doing?"

"Great, now that you're here." She smiled down at you and was about to say something else when a shocked cough interrupted her. Minji turned to look at Yeonjun, giving him a not so subtle annoyed expression. "Oh hey, Yeonjun. Were you and my girlfriend talking about something important? Sorry to interrupt you." You loved how she said girlfriend in a protective way, pulling you closer to her and tightening her hold on you.

"Oh, it was nothing." You interrupted Yeonjun before he could answer her, feeling a bit more confident in the safety of her arms. "Don't worry about it."

"Yeah, it was nothing." He mumbled, smiling awkwardly. "See you two around." He skipped away quite quickly, mumbling something under his breath.

You turned to look at Minji as she cursed him quietly, giggling as you gently caressed her nape to calm her down. You were about to lean in to kiss her again when a loud squeal interrupted you.

"I'm sorry?! I think I missed a chapter!? Girlfriend!?" The two of you turned to look at your friends, all plastering shocked faces, but Haerin was the only one smiling between them.

"Oh, did we forget to tell you guys?" Minji said nonchalantly, blinking at them before a big smile appeared on her face as she turned to look at you. "We are dating!"

"You fucking asshole! I knew your data was fine!" Haerin slapped your shoulder, quite strongly, as she recovered from her surprise. "I told you it'd go well!"

"Wait, Haerin knew about this?!" Hanni pointed accusingly at the catlike girl, still looking between you and Minji in shock.

"She knew I liked Minji..." You trailed off shyly as you looked between Danielle and Hyein, waiting their reaction to the new information.

The australian girl seemed to finally snap out of her shock, jumping excitedly on top of you and your girlfriend, squealing loudly. "You have to tell me everything! I can't believe it! I can't believe it! You two look so cute together!"

"What are your intentions with my unnie?" Hyein pointed at Minji, trying her best to look intimidating, but she looked toi happy to be taken seriously.

"Don't worry about her, kid. I'll take good care of miss cutie for you." Minji laughed at Hyein, patting her head.

"What the fuck, bro!" Hanni also joined her girlfriend in the hug, pulling you and Minji's faces close to her. "Congrats, man! You finally got the girl!"

"Okay, wait." Danielle pulled back, looking at her cellphone. "We have thirty minutes before class, you have to tell us everything!"

You all laughed, beginning to walk towards the court to your usual spot, your girlfriend's arm securely wrapped around your shoulders, and you were still wearing her jacket.

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thank you for reading <3

[canisbrutus]

you knew it was coming

Parker Ogilvie HCs 🍀

(dear god this got long)

The Basics:

he's lonely. painfully lonely.

even among his clique he always felt a bit stinted; only there because of the status they shared.

awkward in conversation and floundering 'meaningful' relations, it always seemed like people knew some innate rules of discussion he could not make sense of.

so he dulls himself, follows the herd, looks to derby.

to be authentic would either out him as a 'class traitor' or just plain crazy.

it's not worth the risk of being alone again.

Expanded Lores:

born from a somewhat lesser house in the vale, parker's parents were musicians first and foremost.

the pair had met at a concert, of sorts. his father played the violin, and his mother, the piano.

(sidenote: he can play both)

with one being scottish and the other being korean, neither were related, so cheers to parker for not being inbred.

and honestly? as far as rich parents go, they were kind of decent people, aside from being stuck up and insensitive at times.

good thing too; parker required a fair deal of patience as a child.

he wasn't sickly mind you, aside from some pet allergies; a trait he shared with his mother (they kept massive saltwater fishtanks for companionship rather than hounds like most preps) (this was not made awkward at all by parker taking up a pescatarian diet)

he was just autistic, and all the joys that came with.

context: the general mental health support in bullworth is pretty damn shit.

to get around the dubious state of special education in this town, parker was both homeschooled And privately tutored in his elementary years.

this didn't help his grasp on people skills much, but thankfully his parents didn't skimp on taking him to Social Engagements.

general dinner parties with other rich snobs with their equally snobby kids.

uncomfortable as hell for him. but there was one boy, almost equally awkward, he got along with more than most.

that kid was tad.

tad is however incredibly fucked up on his own, so he was perhaps not the best friend to rely on.

even if he did make an effort to include parker in the rest of the clique's games. suggesting he join the boxing team and whatnot.

parker had a healthy amount of fear of derby and certain others of the clique, but he had an image to uphold.

circling back to the engagements, they were overstimulating and awful, and people always wanted something different than what they were asking for.

many a time did he simply need to mask and suck it up, but whenever the parties were at Home, he'd retreat to the garden.

Dedicated Gnome Section:

his family took great pride in their landscaping, you see. their perfectly cultivated zen palace; in fact it was often encouraged for him to go out and meditate among the flowers and ferns.

well, wouldn't you know a novelty potter set up shop in the vale, and his sculptures became the latest trend?

on the night of his 14th birthday, in the devolving afterparty where all the adults were getting drunk, he'd slipped out and found the latest additions in garden decor.

twas early in august; he was about to start his freshman year of highschool proper, both pressure and anxiety mounting, coupled with that ever present feeling of being on the fringe of his peers.

admittedly he'd also been rewarded with a glass or two of prosecco as he had graduated from being a Child, and was feeling the effects of alcohol.

it's of very little surprise his mask slipped and he ended up confiding in the never-judgemental clay figure.

as silly as it seemed, it felt more freeing than any conversation he'd taken part in before, any connection he'd had before.

of course, tad told him many a horror story about his older brother, so he had to act smart.

the gnome, now named Geoffry, fell into his routine with ease; he was always Alone when he had to 'meditate' in the garden anyhow.

it's difficult to explain to anyone not in the loop, so to speak, but geoff did communicate back in his own ways, in parker's mind.

the glint of the sun off his glaze, the clouds reflection fogging up his eyes, a soft breeze washing over him and kissing his hair; small shows of nature magic. gnomes are earth spirits, after all.

parker had done his research on the folklores for the sake of understanding him better, at the cost of getting chased out of the nerd's turf at the library.

you're not crazy if it all makes sense to you.

hell, he even started looking into environmentalism for geoff's sake; greener causes, better values, slowly but surely.

he's still a relatively entitled prick of course; his peers and parents have that instilled into him. but gnomes are sort of hippies, and it was rubbing off on him.

how lucky he was, to have such a companion holding his hand on a spiritual journey.

regardless, it goes without saying their unique relationship turned from platonic to something else as parker further opened up to the gnome.

geoff was never to leave his property, though. to bring him onto academy grounds would mean his near immediate destruction.

but that didn't make him safe from 'pranks.'

gord is a royal pain in the ass for a number of reasons, one of which being disrespecting other's 'belongings.'

despite being banned from parker's house after him and his friend chad brought Chester into the garden, making one hell of a mess and fucking with both parker and his mother's allergies.

i think the way that ended is best left unsaid. but it wasnt geoff's fault. how could it be, when he couldnt move on his own?

the gnome wasnt the only broken one in the yard that afternoon.

but as always, life goes on.

category 5 autism event over, we will return to our inbox requests shortly.

random bonus definitions os/or: objectsexual & objectromantic posic: acronym for perception of object sentience, individuality, and consciousness. there are more of us than you think

[hc masterpost]

[thequietkid-moonie]

Could you write a Genshin story with Lumine where Lumine fell in love with a mortal reader a long, long, LONG time ago and she of course outlived them and now we cut to the present time to where all day she is acting very strange and everyone around her notices something is wrong and so they ask her what is bothering her and she just casually reveals that it is her past lovers death anniversary and that she is just remembering and reminiscing on all the good and fun times together when they were still alive

Reminiscing someone she lost

[ ONE-SHOT ] [ Lumine ]

[ Genshin Impact ]

× I know Aether is the cannon traveler but I decided to take Lumine as the traveler for this one

Beautiful beautiful pain ~ a cruel love story perfect for this romantic heart ~ hehe thanks for your request! I absolutely loved the idea and I hope you love how it ended up as well!

Ever since they started traveling together Paimon has always being there to help Lumine and teach her all kind of diferent things about Teyvat, from the culture of each nations to even how to read and write the language

Paimon (along with all her new friends) have made sure to welcome Lumine and even invite her over to every event and festival that is being held in each nations she has offered help before, and since she doesn't want to say no to her friends Lumine has even made sure to write down all of that so she won't forget, keeping it in her mind while also trying to find any useful clue about her missing brother

Lumine has being so busy that she almost forgot about the time, being in a new world and having to adapt to everything around here has kept her mind too busy, so, one day as she was going throught her notes about everything planned with her friends and thinking on how her journey should continue her mind simply start to drift off, getting lost while thinking on everything and anything until Lumine was suddenly drag to reality by a realization, the aniversary of the last time she saw you have came in a blink of an eye

This sudden realization definetly take her off guard and slowly make her feel bad, no matter how much times it pass from the moment she lost you that doesn't mean she miss you less, and, for the first time since then, she doesn't have the comforting precence of her brother to help her

Because of the jounery she have followed on Teyvat Lumine can't simply stay in bed and feel bad because of it (she doesn't want it neither), she still has matter to attend so with that excuse she tries to simply brush off the feeling and go with her day, but the more time it pass the more she feels in the verge of tears, despite trying to stay stronge, not wanting to concern her friends she just can't stop herself from zoning out almost all day, being considerable more quiet than usual, barely being able to put a smile, but at the end Lumine simply take the first opportunity she has to finish her job and go away alone

Anyone who saw her in this state was quite concern but no one really understood why she was so down, and asking Paimon for any kind of explanation was useless since she didn't knew neither. At the end it was better to let Lumine has some time alone like she wanted, but Paimon (already overwhelmed by the questions from others and her own concern) decided to stick to her side at least to make her feel less lonely, waiting until Lumine was ready to tell her what was upseting her so much

It took too much from Lumine to be able to open up without start crying right there, carefully and even slowly telling Paimon the pain her heart holds, telling her the story about how in one of her many travels along with he brother she found a beautiful world, but what made that world special wasn't excatly the world itself but rather one person, you. They were only supposed to be passing through but the feelings that were slowly growing in her heart for you make her not wanting to leave, Aether quickly understood and simply decide to support her sister with her love, it took some time but Lumine finally started to oficially date the person she have fallen in love, and that love made nothing but grow over time, simply becoming like a big family over the years

The three of you spend so much time together as a big family that it felt like nothing could went wrong, it was pure happiness and love after all! However, unlike the siblings you were from a short-lived species, it was a fact that you will perish long before her and there is nothing that could be done about it, it was just how things were after all. The siblings decide to stay at your side until the last of your days and you were inmesily loves until the end, they were there with you the moment your life reached the end and both said goodbye with a smile, not wanting to make you feel bad for leaving sooner than them, even when Lumine simply broke in tears after you took your last breath

It has already being a long time since that happened but Lumine simply can't forget the great love of her life, normally she would have her brother here to comfort her or simply remember those times with you, but now she doesn't have him neither and despite all her friends she can't help to feel lonely, after all, non of them even know you have ever existed, still that didn't stopped Paimon to ask who you were

Since Lumine used to spend this day reminiscing with her brother about the lover she lost Paimon wanted to do it too in behalf of her brother, maybe she didn't meet you in person but she knows Lumine, and if she speaks so highly and lovely of you then you probably were someone amazing! Thats why Paimon want to hear all kind of stories of you

At the end of the day Lumine and Paimon spent all the time talking about you, about how amazing you were, how much she loved having you in her life and how much she miss you, but despite being a quite sad conversation it make feel Lumine comforted, making her smile again

[sal-absinthii]

I agree fully with the first paragraph of the OP, that it is entirely fair and reasonable to set boundaries and even to end relationships, and this is something that irritates me with how often it comes up from Snape fans; there was certainly room for both of them to have had more understanding and patience for the other, but expecting that to be infinite (especially when we're talking about teenagers, and when it is expected much more from one than from the other) is very unfair.

However, I disagree with the rest of it. The story does NOT make her out to be a flawless saint. Ironically, the objection about showing vs telling IS the point here -- people who either believe that Lily was flawless or believe that she was intended to be flawless are basing this entirely off of what other characters say about her, all of whom had their own reasons for seeing her in this light. Lupin feels almost unhealthily grateful to anyone who doesn't immediately hate him, and ignores their faults. He does this with both James and Lily. Sirius seems to use Lily as a way to downplay James' actions, which he was complicit in. Harry of course sees the mother he never knew in a positive light, and he is also disturbed by some of what he sees about her in Snape's memory (although I think this is also untrustworthy; he spends the whole of OotP projecting and misreading negative feelings onto other people and Lily "almost" smiling means that she didn't smile). Slughorn plays up Lily's good qualities because he wants to butter up Harry, and prove he isn't racist against muggleborns, and because as a teacher he wouldn't necessarily have been privy to the same teenage drama as her classmates. Snape sees her positively because she was the only one who ever really treated him nicely and I think like Lupin he lacks the self-esteem to not attribute everything good about himself to her. With all of them, the distance of time and memory creates an idealised version of her that is not necessarily how she really was, and this is a theme that recurs throughout the series with regards to multiple characters, so I don't think we actually ARE supposed to take any of that at face value.

I do sometimes get the impression that people are unfair on JKR with respect to this because they have made up their minds about her overall politics and social beliefs based on one specific controversy and that this inclines people to take things at face value when that isn't really the point of it at all, simply because they've already decided that her being a TERF means she's a misogynist or racist or classist or whatever else and that therefore any character who expresses views like that or that could be taken in that light must be what the story is endorsing when in fact it often is the opposite.

Many defenders of Lily Evans mistakenly believe that criticisms of her character are primarily rooted in her relationship with Severus Snape, but that’s not the case. It’s entirely valid for someone to set boundaries and end a friendship when they feel it’s necessary. Lily didn’t owe Severus anything; he neither made grand gestures for her nor sacrificed himself on her behalf. There’s no significant display of merit from him that would obligate Lily to feel indebted to him.

My issue with Lily Evans lies in how the narrative portrays her as a flawless woman simply because she embraced motherhood, made it her defining trait, and sacrificed her life for her son—as if that isn’t the bare minimum traditionally expected of women. Her character embodies a profoundly conservative and misogynistic background (like all adult women in the Harry Potter series, who are either devoted wives and mothers or vilified for stepping outside traditional roles). This portrayal is highly contradictory because, while she’s depicted as morally perfect, she seemingly had no issue with her best friend associating with unsavory individuals until it directly affected her, nor did she hesitate to marry a bully. Frankly, this is entirely inconsistent with the image the narrative attempts to project of her.

I don’t care how many characters claim she was wonderful; it needs to be shown, not just stated. The first rule of plot or character development is “show, don’t tell,” and no one should lecture me about narrative comprehension if they don’t grasp such a basic concept.