#and im sorry for updating this eight months (!!!) later

[thesunisatangerine]

playing for keeps – chapter four

alexia putellas x barçakeeper!childhoodfriend!reader

warning/s: coarse language; mentions of: grief, death, drowning; not proofread

(a/n in the tags) [chapters: one, two, three, four]

word count: 13.1k

[1]

‘Can you meet me at the playground?’ was Guille’s message the night after your graduation, casting a blue streak over a relatively warm summer night. The short hand of the clock hovered over eleven when you got it, and you had half a mind to ignore it–because how dared he do this now?–but you sent him a reply before heading out of the door.

The playground was less than ten minutes away but you took the corner; the one that led around the block. He could wait, you thought. After all, you’d been giving him just that: the luxury of time. But he never did anything with it did he, so why would you rush? And what could he possibly want now after months of ignoring you? Was this a final goodbye? After everything you’d been through together, was this really how it’s going to end? 

You sniffled and ran the back of your hand over your eyes as you walked the last few yards to the park.

Tap tap tap.

The distinct sound of football-to-shoe brought you back. Ahead under the yellow glow of the lone streetlamp that lit the playground, with his back turned to you, was Guille juggling a football. A breeze brushed your cheek and it carried the familiar sweetness of Guille’s body spray. You remembered when he started using it—it was around the time you’d complained to him about how you found the scent of guy’s deodorants repugnant, and that you could only stand the new scent that he bought. And after that, it was all he’d ever used. You couldn’t help but wonder if that was around the time he started liking you, and the thought made you recoil. 

The ball reached another high, this time going over Guille’s head, making him turn, but it never connected to a touch. Instead, it landed on the ground. Its momentum carried it to a stop just a few paces away from you but you made no move to kick it back. You dragged your eyes away from the ball and found his finally.

For a moment, it was as if the world stood still. You soaked in the state of him: there was a heaviness that swelled in the skin beneath his eyes which were devoid of their usual light; his arms sagged heavily by his sides, contorting the contours of his silhouette to a shape that displaced the confidence you’d seen him wear so easily growing up. Even in the low light, the jagged cut that interrupted the line of his left brow remained prominent, but it was gone from view when dark curls fell to cover it after Guille ran his fingers through his hair.

He cleared his throat before he spoke, yet his voice still broke over his words. 

“Hey. Uh–thank you for coming,” he smiled a little. “Can we talk?”

You eyed him carefully, letting a moment of silence settle in the air as you crossed your arms. Only after you noted a slight movement in Guille’s throat did you skim the sole of your foot over the ball, sending it his way. When you met his eyes again, something akin to relief shone in them––or maybe it was gratitude?––before he kicked the ball towards you again. That went on for a while; back and forth the ball went during which no one said a word. From the way Guille kept clenching and unclenching his hands, you doubted he knew what he even wanted to say, least of all how to say it.

Still, you waited. 

Another moment, he stopped the ball, wiped his hands on the sides of his shirt before stuffing them in his short pockets, his posture awkward and stiff. He opened his mouth and in the breath before he spoke his first word, your heart dropped to your stomach and you braced yourself.

This was it.

“I–I want to apologize!”

You blinked. That… was unexpected.

“I know it’s probably too late, but I don’t think I can live without saying it, you know?” He shrugged as he smiled, but it was too crooked, and his eyes shone. 

“I’m really sorry. For what I did, and what I said. Those hurt you… I hurt you.”

He released a shaky breath, bit his lower lip as he swiped a thumb at the corner of his eye.

“I’m not expecting to be forgiven and I understand if you don’t want to be friends anymore. I just–I’m sorry. And I want you to know that I had the best time with you.” 

His lips curled up to a smile but the quiver of his chin broke the curve and his tears spilled. 

He looked so young then, so much like a lost little boy who looked nothing like the boy you met when you were eight: newly-transferred Guille who became the smallest out of all the boys in your class yet, with his quiet confidence, he towered over them with his head held high. You remembered him as he was then when he first introduced himself to you, his cheeks rosy from playing too much under the sun and just a little out of breath when he asked you to be in his team during recess. He did it too without any snide remarks, something you’d gotten used to from playing with the other boys in class. He never brought your being a girl up even when your team lost, and it was the first time you were treated as an equal on the field at school. 

And he just stuck with you, and you with him; all the shared lunches, the laughter, the late night banters… there was no way you could let this friendship go. 

This was so stupid. 

“This is stupid,” you choked as you hastily wiped a tear away but it was quickly followed by another. “Come here, you idiot!” 

You surged forward and wrapped your arms around him, the force of it nearly knocking the both of you over. It took him a second but when the weight of his arms settled on you––when his comforting warmth finally seeped in––you were hit by just how much you’d missed him.

“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry,” were the strained words spoken against your ear as he hugged you tighter. 

“You’re an idiot,” you mumbled on his shoulder. “It’s going to take some time but we’ll be alright, I forgive you. And I want us to remain friends, under two conditions if you’re up for it.” 

He pulled away slightly to wipe his cheeks, and gave you a small smile. He was a bit breathless when he said, “Anything.” 

There was a light lilt in his tone and you understood he meant it, so you nodded, returning his smile. He followed you when you went to sit on one of the benches, situating himself so there was enough space between you for one person.

Looking him in the eye, you started, “I know it’s a lot to ask but if you have any plans to wait for me, I want you to forget about it. I love you and I care for you, but I need you to understand that a brother and a friend is all I will find in you.” 

His eyes strayed downwards and they clouded over. He closed them with a sigh and when they opened, he looked at you and you found a lightness in them that comforted you; his face bore a friendly warmth that you haven’t seen in a while.

“I understand, and you don’t have to apologise.” 

He scooted closer so he could bump his knee against yours, now grinning. His playfulness made you smile.

“And one more thing,” you added after a moment, and he nodded for you to continue. “You… you have to make amends with Alexia.” 

The grin fled from his face and you didn’t miss the way he flinched. His knuckles whitened and tension brewed in his muscles. And when his eyes darkened, you couldn’t help but frown at the change in his demeanor. You reached out to touch his shoulder.

“Guille––”

Then, like a spring, all the air of rigidness left him. He threw his head back and released a laugh that caught you off guard. When he regarded you again, the curve of his lips remained.

Then he said in a tone filled with mirth, “You know, if she hadn’t knocked some sense into me that night, I’d probably still be wallowing in self-pity like an entitled prick.”

At the reminder, your eyes wandered to the scar on his left brow but they lingered only for a second.

“And yes, done. She hates my guts,” you opened your mouth to protest otherwise but when Guille gave you a pointed look, you closed it immediately, “but I will patch things up with her. Besides, I need to thank her for straightening me out.”

You gaped at him.

“It’s that easy?”

He shrugged, still smiling.

“I mean, yeah? It’s either those or losing you, and I know I value you more than I do my pride and ego.”

There it was again, his quiet confidence. It diminished though when he brushed a finger over the bridge of his nose, eyes darting down to his feet briefly before meeting yours again. And when he spoke, there was more than a little uncertainty that bled into his tone, and maybe a little bit of hope. 

“Besides, we’re friends. Right?”

You scrunched your nose at him in answer as you grinned.

“Damn right,” you confirmed. Then you punched his shoulder for good measure. His jaw dropped open in an offended gasp. He sat there wide-eyed for a moment before he locked an arm around your neck, his free hand mussing up your hair in an instant, and you could only shriek and chortle at the action. 

In that moment, you felt as if a weight had finally been lifted off your shoulders. And there was no better way to truly feel the lightness of being than having somebody to laugh with. Then a comfortable pause washed over you both as you caught your breaths. In the silence that settled, you leaned back on your hands and kicked your feet up idly in the air. 

It was Guille who spoke first. 

“You don’t have to answer, but do you like someone?”

Your feet stilled. And then, without bidding, a series of images flashed through your mind of brown hair, freckles, hazel… Warmth coiled and gathered in your chest as if the ghost of a hand hovered over it. 

“It’s her, isn’t it?”

A distinct pop went off somewhere in your neck from the speed by which you gaped at him. Guille’s eyes remained trained ahead and his face was relaxed, void of any judgement… Surely, he didn’t say what you thought he said, right? 

You swallowed, throat dry, and choked, “What did you say?”

“Alexia.” He turned to you then, and smiled; small but not unkindly. “She’s the one, isn’t she?”

Blood thundered in your ears, and your heartbeat tripled. 

“No! I–That’s ridic–”

Warmth over your hand; Guille had taken yours into his, and the ice in your skin thawed instantly. Only when Guille tightened his grip to still your hand did you know just how badly you were shaking. 

“Hey, look at me. It’s okay. I won’t tell anyone, I swear,” his voice was soothing and he squeezed your hand for good measure. “I think, deep down, I’ve always known. Maybe that’s why I treated everything as a competition because I felt threatened by her. And I never understood why you always gravitated towards her like she’s your own Earth. But now I know. If… If I ever made it difficult to come to terms with your feelings for her, I’m sorry.” 

His words and their sincerity brought a calm with them, stopping the surge of panic in your veins. And, like a tide, it receded. Finally finding your voice again, you spoke. 

“You–you’re not angry?”

His brows rose.

“Why would I be?”

Then he gave you another smile. You understood it was meant to reassure you but you couldn’t help but notice that the corners of his lips were somewhat weighed down with sadness. Still, judgement made no home in his eyes. 

“I won’t tell anyone. I promise. And if you ever want to talk, I’m here.”

A brief pause as his eyes wandered. 

“I–Maybe not for a while. It’s not that I want to, but I think some distance will do me some good. I want to respect your boundaries, and for me to do that, I need to get my feelings sorted out. I’m… I’ve made up my mind anyway. I’m leaving the city.” 

“What?” You choked. “When? Where are you going?”

Then a spark of anger went off. You jabbed at his shoulder. Guille yelped suddenly, his eyes became wide with surprise. 

“You jerk! Is that the reason why you’re finally saying sorry?!” 

“I–No, of course not! I mean, yeah, but no!” He gestured in the air. “What I’m trying to say is… I’m here because I want to make amends, not because I feel like I had to. Besides, I won’t be leaving for another two months.” 

Oh.

“Oh.” Your cheeks felt warm. 

“Yeah, ‘oh’.” He repeated with a sarcastic note but a playful spark lit up his eyes. 

You apologised sheepishly. Then, “Where are you headed? And what are you going to do?”

Guille shrugged, leaning back against his arms as he looked up at the night sky.

“I don’t know yet. I was thinking of travelling for a bit, maybe go around Europe first? Do you remember how Aunt Aloma lives in London? Yeah, she told me I could stay with her if I ever planned to go there for university.”

When he mentioned London, a lead sank into your gut. Logically, you knew it wasn’t too far away; the three-hour long flight would be a small price to pay to see Guille again. The fact that he wouldn’t be an arm’s reach away like he was right then—that childhood was departing—made your chest ache. You didn’t know you’d teared up until you felt Guille’s hand on your shoulder and the consequent squeeze there. 

“Don’t cry on me now, I haven’t even left yet.” He said lightly but his eyes were glazed over, too. “Hey, don’t worry, it won’t be for good. Before you know it, I’ll be back here to annoy you. And you know, maybe once I’ve settled in London you could even visit.”

You took his hand and squeezed it back, saying, “Just say the word and I’ll be there. 

[2]

“He’s studying what now?” 

“Sports Psychology. Pay attention.” You swatted at Alexia’s hand but she ignored you. She continued to pinch some more grass from beside where she was laying and let them get carried by the breeze as she threw them into the air. The blades of grass flew freely but some of them landed on her chest and stomach where a bunch of them had begun to pile up. Still, she continued her endeavor. She looked ridiculous but warmth filled you nonetheless, and you smiled as you leaned over to pick them off her jersey. 

Alexia hummed with a note of surprise, “He works fast. He’s only been away for four months?”

“Well, we are talking about Guille here.” 

“Hmm, I always thought Lover Boy would end up in physio–Hey!” 

Alexia yelped when you jerked your thigh that her head was resting on.

“Stop calling him that,” you reprimanded with a light flick to her forehead. At the reminder though, your cheeks warmed. 

She rubbed her forehead as she narrowed her eyes at you, then with a huff and a pout, “Fine, fine! No need to get defensive. Why is it such a big deal anyway?”

“Because, Alexia, we’re all trying to move on.”

“You make it sound like the two of you broke up or something.” She snickered before adding, “Which begs the question, why didn’t you ever go out with him? Minus the fact that he gave you a concussion, of course.” 

Her tone changed at the end, an inflection of something bitter—a bit of her protectiveness showing through—that you chose to ignore. Yet you found yourself unable to answer her anyway. 

You recalled the conversation you had with Guille that night, the way he figured out who held your heart so easily. Ever since, a question gnawed at the edge of your mind, the same one that whispered to you now: were your feelings so transparent? So obvious? 

A brush against your jaw pulled you back and, upon looking down, you were met with the question still in Alexia’s eyes. You shrugged, pulling away from her touch as nonchalantly as you could. 

“Guille is a friend and only that.”

“But you were so close,” she commented.

“Proximity doesn’t always mean intimacy, Alexia.” You were grasping for straws, you knew this. Your eyes wandered before you admitted with another shrug, “Besides, I can’t really see myself in a relationship. Not right now, anyway.”

“Oh.” The sound Alexia made was gentle, barely audible, that you thought it was the wind’s whisper. And then in a tone so soft, “Really? You don’t like anyone? Anyone at all?”

There was something in the way she asked that beckoned you to look back down at her. The scattered rays of the sun dappled her freckled cheeks with flushed amber, and her eyes that were normally a deep shade of ochre shone golden in the light. There was a softness in them that made your heart stutter, and another thing you couldn’t quite figure out, almost a plea, but about what?

You dragged your eyes away from her lips to meet her eyes.

“No, I don’t think it’s for me,” you murmured.

She stared at you for a long time. It felt like being swallowed into their depths and you could do nothing but be swept away, keep the contact somehow, lest she’d find something she shouldn’t see. So you stared right back. 

Eventually, she whispered, “Maybe you just haven’t found the right person yet.”

The lump in your throat remained even after you swallowed. Finally looking away, you hummed out in half-agreement.

“Yeah. Maybe you’re right.”

A pause.

“Do you miss him?” 

“I do. I really do.” You admitted with a sigh. 

After another moment of silence, Alexia continued.

“Would… would you join a club in England?” 

Your gaze flicked back down to her, frowning a little.

“It’s either Barça or Bayern for me, Alexia. You know this.” 

At that, Alexia averted her eyes, picked a fallen leaf, twirled it between her fingers, and then looked at it as if it held the mysteries of the world. 

Carding a finger through her hair, you prompted softly, “Why would you ask that?” 

She shrugged, quirking the corner of her lips downwards. Then she met your eyes with barely concealed vulnerability, voice hesitant when she asked, “So, you’re staying?”

“I am,” you said firmly, smiling at her. “Besides, we’re in this together, aren’t we? Wherever you go, I’ll follow.” 

Finally, her lips broke into a grin.

“I can’t wait to play with you when we get on the first team.” She said with such certainty you couldn’t help but grin back.

“Do you really think we’ll make it?”

“Yeah. We will, you’ll see.”

And you did.

There reflected in her eyes the vision of a future. That familiar splendor of passion—that unwavering resolve—shone untarnished, and the mere sight of it filled you with an overwhelming desire to kiss her. Instead, you leaned down and pressed your forehead to hers.

Alexia accepted the contact with a sigh, and then she whispered, “Sorry to say, but you’re stuck with me, too.”

[3]

You got into Barça’s first team—the both of you did. 

There was a moment where you thought it was too good to be true, and that surely the other shoe would drop any time soon. 

And it did.

Maybe deep down, you hoped otherwise; that the universe would prove you wrong. But the universe had a wicked sense of humor, and you would’ve laughed at the cruelty of the joke if anguish had not choked your laughter tight into tears. The taste of achievement was still fresh on your tongue, still on your way to relishing it, before that same sweetness quickly soured to bitter disappointment. 

Not a year after joining Barça’s first team ranks, the news reached you. Our funds were not enough, they said, and they were sorry they had to cut the women’s team. There was no other way, the club didn’t have enough money to keep the team in the league.

The fact that you got a taste of your dream only to have the rug pulled beneath you was maddening, and it made the pain from the fall all the more worse. The news hit you hard, but Alexia took it the worst.

There was a thin line between perseverance and obsession, and some would even go so far to say that the two were opposite sides to the same coin. You know this. And you also know that Alexia had tossed that coin so many times now that she’d probably forgotten what each of those faces meant, progressively confounding one for the other until they were now one and the same.

Looking back now, the signs were all there: you were blinded by your own loss and your admiration for Alexia that you failed to see it or what it really was—a festering obsession. The signs were there in your time with Espanyol, especially during the first few months after the news of Barça’s restructuring broke; they were present in the way Alexia behaved compulsively, always seething with barely concealed hunger, her tenacity both on and off the field magnified to the tens. It waned somewhat during the season but now with the both of you facing another move—to Levante this time—her obsession resurfaced with renewed vigor, corrupting each knot of her muscle to constrict to their breaking point.

“Ale, do you want to come over to mine?” You asked, leaning against the doorframe of Alexia’s bedroom, while Alexia remained hunched over a folder filled with formations, the same one she’d been studying since last match day.

“Why?” She threw over her shoulder, not even turning to look at you.

You picked at your thumb. 

“I don’t know. Just come and sleep over? Mamá and Papá have been asking about you, you know?”

Finally she turned and her eyes found you. They were flat and the skin under them looked darker than they were yesterday. A slight crease was present between her brows, and her lips drooped slightly at the corners, seemingly unimpressed.

“I just saw them yesterday.” 

Okay, maybe that was a lie.

You shrugged it off, “Doesn’t matter. Come visit anyway.”

“I have other things to worry about,” Alexia grumbled with annoyance, turning around to assume her previous position.

“That’s not going to run away from you, Alexia. Come on.”

 Without letting her get another word in, you took her wrist in a gentle grip and tugged her away from her table. Although you had to admit, it was difficult not to remain unfazed when Alexia got like this, especially considering what she’s going through. Another part of your brain was saying the opposite; that it was because of what she’s going through that you had to intervene like this.

“Hey, wait! What are you doing?!” Alexia protested halfway down the stairs.

“Dragging you to my place, of course.”

“What about my things?”

“You have clothes there. Or, you can just wear my stuff.”

“But we have training!”

“It’s only a light session tomorrow.” 

“But—”

“Alexia.” 

You fixed a stern eye at her over your shoulder and she opened her mouth, as if to say something, before she shut it, sighing in defeat.

The both of you just made it down the stairs to see the front door swing open. Eli entered first, Alba trailing in after. At the sight of her family, Alexia strode to where they were to greet them; she kissed Eli on her temple, and Alba on top of her head.

“How’s Papá?”

Eli gave her daughter a small smile, but the skin around her eyes remained taut, weighed down by something inexplicably heavy. 

“He’s stable, love. The same as when you saw him this morning.” Eli’s gaze flicked to you. “Are you girls heading out?”

You nodded.

“I’ll be stealing away Alexia for the night. Is that okay?”

Eli smiled at you, “Of course.”

“We made some food for dinner. They’re on the stove top.”

“Oh, thank you, my girls.” Eli said, hugging you goodbye after you’d put on your shoes. Then she whispered in your ear, “Thank you.”

In response, you only hugged her tighter. Without meaning to, your eyes fleeted over to Alexia who was having a hushed conversation with Alba. By the end of it, Alexia embraced her little sister, placing another kiss atop her head only this time, Alexia’s brows were deeply creased. 

When you pulled away, you said, squeezing Eli’s hands. “Get some rest, Má. I’ll bring her back first thing after practice tomorrow.” 

And with that, you and Alexia headed out. 

The transit to your place was punctuated with a vacuous silence. Alexia sat beside you, less than an arm’s reach away, but her eyes were trained at somewhere far on the horizon; and she, even farther. But you let her be, there was plenty of time to talk later after all. 

By the time you got home, the lights were already off save for the small night light in the hallway so the both of you climbed the stairs on your toes, making sure to avoid that one creaky spot by the corner.

“You can clean up here, I’ll use the other shower. “ You said, jutting your chin to the direction of the shower. 

Alexia only nodded.

When you returned to your room, the bathroom was empty, a fresh glass of water stood by your night stand, and Alexia was nowhere to be seen. You were just about to head downstairs when she padded into your room with a towel draped over her head and a damp spot from her hair on a shirt you recognised to be yours. 

She must’ve seen the question in your eyes because she muttered, “Double-checked the door lock.”

You hummed as she walked past you, back into the bathroom, and you heard the tap run. 

“Thanks for the water,” you said while taking a sip from the glass she put there.

A sound of recognition came from Alexia.

When Alexia finally finished her business in the bathroom, hair slightly ruffled and almost dry, you were already settled in bed, the sheets on her side pulled off in silent invitation. But Alexia remained standing there, by the golden cast of your night lamp, looking a bit lost for reasons you understood.

Softly, you coaxed, “Hey.”

Alexia’s eyes flicked to you and your heart ached at the sight of them so dulled and weary. It took her another moment but she finally slid in next to you, the warmth of her finally arriving home and seeping into your bones. When her feet brushed over your legs as she shifted beside you, you joked with a hushed giggle to lighten the mood, “Get your cold feet away from me.” 

It worked because her lips quirked up slightly, eyes rolling in jest, but not a second later, her eyes dimmed again, and she looked away. You propped yourself up on your elbow to see her clearly but she refused to meet your eyes. Tucking a lock of hair behind her ear, you whispered, the words cracking under the weight of your emotion.

“Ale, talk to me.”

Silence.

A breath.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” came the hoarse reply.

Breathing deeply, you buried your fingers in her hair to try and soothe her. And again, you spoke in whispers. 

“You know, it’s okay to grieve about it, to be angry about it. You don’t have to be strong all the time, Alexia.”

Her eyes flashed with something red then and she growled.

“And what will grieving get me? The way through is forward and only forward. Do you think the world will stop to give you enough time to grieve? To be angry?”

She continued, each word exhaled with urgency. 

“No. The moment you stop, you will be left behind. And I can’t stop. Not now. Especially not now.”

“Having a moment for yourself isn’t stopping. You can’t expect yourself to go on like this forever. Sometimes, you have to do what’s good for yourself, Alexia.”

A scoff.

“It doesn’t matter what’s good for me. What I need is to get back to Barça. Then, and only then, will I feel at ease.”

“At the expense of what, then? Killing your passion for the sport by making it your duty?”

Alexia startled you when she ripped herself away from you, sitting up so abruptly that the headboard banged against the wall. And when she glared down at you, you found a look in her eyes similar to that of a desperate animal’s; a look where the distinction between fear and anger blurred into something wild. 

Then, through her teeth, she hissed in a low voice.

“It is my duty! It always has been. Don’t you see? It has always been more than a sport to me. It’s not the same for you and I don’t expect you to understand because you—”

She stopped herself, facing forward in an instant, pinching the bridge of her nose as she setted her arms over her folded knees. 

Slowly, you rose, and only the sound of sheets settling around your waist filled the air. This momentary reprieve was mainly for Alexia’s sake—she was overwhelmed, that was clear to see—but maybe you needed a moment yourself because what she said hurt you. Still, you soldiered on because this was for Alexia. 

She tensed upon your touch, her muscles rippled beneath your palm as you dragged it from the small of her back, tracing the contours of her spine to the nape of her neck, but by the time your hand finally settled on her opposite shoulder, some of the tension had melted away.

“No, you’re right, I don’t understand,” you began, voice strained. “I don’t understand why you’re so adamant in destroying yourself. This—this shutting your family out with what’s happening with you. Your mother is worried sick. She’s asking about how you are, Alexia, do you know that? Your own mother!” 

Alexia released a weary sigh and then said in an even wearier tone.

“She has no need to worry.”

You almost scoffed at that, but stopped yourself although you couldn’t help the severity that bled into your next words.

“How could she not when you’re working yourself to the bone? Tell me, how do you expect us not to worry?” 

Silence. Then the murmur of folding fabric when Alexia curled into herself, head buried in the arms folded over her knees. In that cavern of her own making, a ragged breath echoed, followed by the shuddering of muscles. You ached at the state of her, and there was a lump in your throat that you couldn’t swallow. 

And barely above a whisper, you breathed, “You cannot carry the whole weight of the world by yourself. You’re not Atlas, Alexia. Let your family in.”

“Ale,” you tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. Red eyes peered from the darkness of her arms and it broke you, but you had to plead, “Talk to me. Please…”

“I–I’m scared,” she choked out finally. “He’s getting worse. It’s the second attack this month and I—”

Her fingers dug into her arms when she tightened her grip.

“I thought winning the Copa de la Reina last year would give us enough exposure but it wasn’t enough. So, I wanted to do it again this season to prove that we belong in Barça but instead, we lost to them.” A ragged breath. “And now we’re going to Levante. I just–”

She looked up at you, lips quivering with a whimper, “I just want us to go home.”

“Oh, Alexia.” 

Without saying another word, you put your arms around her, forehead pressed close against her ear and the hitch in her breathing resounded loud and clear.

“It’s frustrating, isn’t it, how far we seem from getting back?” Alexia’s back tensed in answer but you only hugged tighter. “But that’s not true at all.”

You felt Alexia lift her head and you moved away just enough to see how she eyed you with confusion. You gave her a small smile as you grazed your knuckles over her tear-stained cheek.

“On top of your club activities, your national performance has been nothing short of exemplary. Those matter. And with all the articles they’ve been writing about you, it’s only a matter of time now.” Brightening your tone a little, you added with a playful smile, “you probably won’t finish your season with Levante before Barça gets their hands on you.”

A corner of her lips lifted up upon your remark so you pushed on.

“I know it’s not the same as being in Barça, but what you’ve achieved so far has got to count for something, Alexia. Your father… he’s so, so proud of you.” Your tone shifted, now firm. “And I doubt he’d be happy to know that his daughter is pushing her body past the point of injury to get into Barça. You know your mother and sister have been covering your ass, right? Uh-huh, yeah, I thought so.”

“You need to let yourself breathe,” you kissed her temple, then her shoulder. When your eyes met again, you found a soft look in hers that reminded you of when you were younger. Smoothing her hair again, you asked, “Can you do that, Alexia? Not for us, but for yourself?”

Alexia regarded you for a long, silent moment. Then she closed her eyes, opened them a breath later, and nodded, her lips curling up to a sincere smile. In response, you couldn’t help but grin back at her.

Sensing that her mood had elevated, you placed one last kiss on her temple before you reached over her, towards the lamp to turn it off, leaving your room illuminated by the blue glow of the moon. Alexia needed no guidance to rest her head against your chest and immediately, you wrapped your arms around her. She sighed deep in the crook of your neck and you were filled with a sense of belonging—of wholeness.

Your eyes fluttered shut to the rhythm of  Alexia’s heartbeat pressed against your side.

“I’m sorry”, came the whisper.

“What for?”

“I shouldn’t have said what I did, about you not understanding. That was wrong, and I know all of this means everything to you like the way it means everything to me.”

“I appreciate that, Alexia. Don’t worry about it.” 

“And I’m sorry for—”

“Ale,” you mumbled, pressing a kiss on her crown, “you don’t have to apologise for anything.”

A pause before a deep exhale heated up your neck.

“Thank you, then.”

You hummed, already halfway to dreaming. And with one last reassuring squeeze at her hip, you found yourself murmuring, “I got you. Good night, Ale.”

“Good night,” Alexia said with a kiss to your neck and you slept with a smile on your lips.

[4]

“Alexia! Can you please—Shit!” 

It was too late. 

The box on top of the one you were carrying slid and fell, and all you could do was cringe as it spilled all of your toiletries by the front door. 

“Oops, sorry.”

You turned to Alexia with a glare of slight annoyance, but when you saw her sheepish expression, with the corners of her mouth pulled down and an eye twisted to a flinch, you let it go. With a roll of your eyes and a slight shake of your head, you signaled for her to proceed ahead as you held the door open with your weight. Once inside, she settled her boxes down on the tiled floor, letting out a small grunt as she did so, before she took yours. 

You’d just finished picking up the toiletries when Alexia asked, “That’s the last of it, yes?”

Turning to face her, you saw her wipe the sweat off her temples before settling her hands on her hips. She scanned the would-be living room occupied by some stacks of boxes. Apart from the couch and mattresses, almost everything else needed to be unpacked and organised.

You placed the toiletries on the nearest counter and made a beeline for the couch. On your way, you patted her back and replied. 

“Yep. Just let me take five, and then we can open ‘em up.”

You face-planted on the couch with a groan, which then turned to a sigh not a second later. Those boxes took more from you than you’d anticipated, making the stiffness of the couch feel as soft as clouds to your bones. 

The strain from your eyes began to dissipate the moment your eyes fluttered shut, and you could feel the peace that awaited you in that velvet darkness when you were ripped back to wakefulness the moment a warm, crushing weight pressed onto your spine. 

Alexia had taken it upon herself to drape herself over you like you were the couch itself. 

“What—Alexia!” You yelped, “Get off me!” 

But of course, she did the exact opposite.

“Why? I was just getting comfortable,” Alexia deadpanned. 

She shifted on your back and she at least had the decency to prevent her elbows from digging into your back as she did. The next thing you knew, her front followed the curve of your back, blanketing you in her warmth, while her arms wrapped loosely around your waist.

Your heart thundered in your chest and you tried not to think too hard about it so you snorted out, “I hope you’re comfortable.”

“Since you asked, yes. I very much am, thank you.” 

“You’re so annoying.” 

“I carried those boxes for you.” 

“You didn’t have to if you didn’t make me drop the toiletries.”

“I told you to tape up the box, but you didn’t listen to me, so whose fault is it exactly?”

You rolled your eyes. She was right, but you weren’t about to tell her that. 

“You’re impossible.”

“Impossibly right, yes.”

See? You didn’t have to tell her. 

You scoffed, “Why do I even put up with you?”

“Because you love me,” Alexia said in a matter-of-fact tone that made your heart jump. “Now shush. Let’s nap for a bit and then unpack.”

Alexia yawned, snuggling closer into you. If she heard the way your heart pounded, she didn’t comment on it. As you drifted into a warm slumber, there was weight that pressed against your chest—a realization of some sort—but about what, you didn’t know. 

Only after you woke to find Alexia had unpacked the boxes containing essential items and ordered a bag-full of takeaways; only after the both of you finished dining on paper plates, crossed-legged on the tiled, living room floor, laughing with your mouths full when Alexia made a mess of her food because of her inability to use chopsticks; only after Alexia found her Polaroid camera and took photos of the two of you, her arm slung casually over your shoulder, her lips pressed against your cheek. Then, and only then, did you recognise what that weight was for what it was. 

You knew then: you were utterly and irrevocably gone.

You were in love.

And you could only pray that the heat from your cheeks wouldn’t sell you out. 

[5]

With all the changes that came with moving shelters and clubs, there was no time to think about home. Between getting used to your new club schedules, being acquainted with your new coaches and teammates, and familiarising yourself with the local area, your mind had no energy left to ruminate by the end of the day. And the difference between staying over at Alexia’s—or vice versa—for a few nights and living under the same roof together for the foreseeable future became increasingly obvious as you settled in your apartment in Buñol. 

It was all new but the both of you managed and even somehow established a sort of routine. While you did most of the cooking and half of the cleaning, Alexia did the groceries and, thanks to her natural affinity for the sun—her words, not yours—she insisted on doing the laundry. You teased her about it but more often than not, her weather predictions proved accurate to the forecast, saving the both of you the trouble of dealing with damp clothes. 

But as routine fell into place, so did the yearning for home.

The thing about missing home was that it brought on a different kind of longing. It was the kind that burrowed deep, the kind that dug a gaping hole in your chest and left you at a loss for how to fill it. It provoked the desire to turn back the hands of time, live in a memory, and step back into a moment already gone by. 

Yes, there was a sense of freedom that came with living apart from your family, and sure the distance between Buñol and Mollet was only a three-hour drive or a five-hour train ride away. All of those things are true, but you’d be lying if you said being away from home didn’t feel heavy. 

No more was the comforting presence of your parents at hand nor the jovial company of Alexia’s family nearby; it was just you and Alexia.

And the world never felt bigger than it was now. 

You were lucky, though, to have Alexia with you. She was a piece of home that you took with you, and just having her by your side helped ease the ache somehow. But you have to admit, living with her brought on a different kind of pain. 

Ever since you realized just how deep your feelings for her ran, being around her had only gotten more difficult. Everything and everywhere reminded you of her, and everything she did would send a jolt to your heart that left you breathless. Something as simple as her running her fingers through her hair, or a small smile; a brush against your cheek, a hand against the small of your back—you were sure you were this close to going mad.

The intensity and frequency of these… stutters had only seemed to increase by the day, and frankly, it was beginning to scare you. That, and the questions that had been nagging you lately.

What would Alexia do if she found out that you liked her way more than a friend should? That you liked women? Could Alexia like women? She probably didn’t. She would hate you for this, wouldn’t she? What about your parents? How would you even go about telling them? Would they still love you? What if—

The sound of the key being slotted into the lock, followed by the opening and closing of the door cut your thoughts short. And then came a soft sound, barely audible.

“Alexia?” 

You called out but there was no response so you padded over to the living room. Just before the end of the corridor a small movement caught your eye. You couldn’t help the gasp that escaped your lips even if you tried.

“What—”

The kitten mewled softly again, rubbing itself against the beige tone of the walls as it took you in with those large, yellow eyes. Its coat looked bright and pristine, nearly as white as the petals of the tree heath flowers that bloomed at home in spring. The same flowers that filled the garden of your home with their sweetness. 

“Hey, there. How did you get in here?” You cooed, crouching slowly, before you reached out your hand towards the kitten. It took a cautious step back but you waited patiently, keeping your hand where it was. A moment later, it seemed to have found the courage, stepping forward tentatively to sniff at your finger, before it licked your knuckle. Then it ducked down, nuzzling its head against your palm, its eyes closing from the contact. 

Warmth flooded your chest and you whispered, “Oh, you’re so adorable!”

“She’s yours.”

Your eyes flicked up to find Alexia leaning her weight against the wall, her arms crossed, head tilted slightly to the side; her eyes lidded with something you couldn’t quite recognise but you felt their warmth. The soft smile on her lips made her face look radiant and beneath her gaze, you couldn’t help the heat that rushed to your cheeks.

As an excuse to hide your face, you dipped down your chin to pick the kitten who only yawned in response. 

“Mine?” You asked as you stood up and walked over to where Alexia was, stopping just an arm’s length away.

Alexia only hummed in agreement, her smile still as soft as ever.

At that, you reached and draped your free arm around her neck, whispering against her ear, “Thank you.”

She moved, finally, wrapping her arms around your waist to pull you closer.

“You’re welcome.” Her words, murmured though as they were, curled through the smile you knew she still wore and made their home in your heart. 

“What are you going to name her?” Alexia asked.

“Nona.”

“Nona?”

You hummed in confirmation. You pulled away just enough to make space to look at Nona, and you tried hard not to focus too much on how Alexia had settled her hands on your hips. 

“Mamá, Papá, me” you began, putting up a digit on your free hand as you listed each one, “You, Alba, Eli, Jaume, Guille…”

“And Nona,” Alexia finished for you, smiling down at Nona. Alexia met your eyes again.

“Your family of nine?”

“Mine,” you nodded, “And yours, too.” 

Alexia beamed down at you but then she scrunched her nose. 

“Does Guille need to be there?”

“Alexia!” 

[6]

It was raining when Alexia told you.

On a damp Monday night, a few months following your move to Levante—after the both of you found an apartment in Buñol, and after that fateful day of realisation—she said something that changed everything. 

Throughout the day, you couldn’t help but notice how strange Alexia was behaving. She’d twisted and fiddled with the hem of her jersey during today’s practice enough that she’d torn a hole through one spot. She’d twirled that loose lock of her hair so many times that you’d already lost count, and on the drive home, more than once, sped through a yellow sign. Even now, she was silent beside you as she helped cook the meal for you two tonight when usually, she would have gone over what happened at practice twice at this point. 

And at the rate she was going, she’d end up gnawing off the skin of her lower lip. 

“Why don’t you go ahead and clean up first?” You said as casually as you could, taking both of your plates off the table and moving towards the sink.

Alexia eyed you. 

“Is everything alright?” She asked. You caught a sight of her over your shoulder, sitting up, more alert than a second ago. 

“No, nothing. Why do you ask that?”

A pregnant pause.

“Because you normally let me help with the dishes.”

You shrugged, turning back to the sink. “Seriously, Alexia. It’s nothing. You just look tired. Now go so I can shower. We can put on AHS after.”

Another pause and then finally, you heard the scrape of her chair against the tiles.

“Alright,” she mumbled before her footsteps receded.

Much later, when you’d finished cleaning up and showered, the two of you wounded up on the couch, wrapped in each other with an episode of American Horror Story playing in the background. Alexia’s head was tucked in the crook of your neck while you played with a loose lock of her hair when you finally asked her.

“Are you ready to tell me what you’ve been worrying about all day, or should I keep pretending that I haven’t noticed?” 

You kept your tone light, almost teasing, because you had a feeling that whatever Alexia was about to say had weight to it. And surely enough, as soon as the question had left your mouth did Alexia stiffen against you and her breathing stilled. It took her another moment to pull away, untangling herself from you, before she reclined against the couch. 

Without so much as looking at you, she countered, “Could you hate me?”

The question jarred you and you couldn’t help but frown in confusion. What kind of question was that? You looked at her—searching for answers as to why she would ask such a thing—but Alexia kept her eyes fixed to the TV while the flashing images made shadows play on the smooth neutrality of her forehead and cheeks. You found no answer, so you replied truthfully. 

“No. Disappointed maybe, but hate? I can’t think of anything that would make me hate you.”

At that, her shoulders curled forward, arms crossing over her chest, and her chin dipped down so low it almost looked uncomfortable. 

She said softly, “Just think about it.”

Silence settled—heavily. 

You gnawed your lip, turning over everything in your head, as you tried desperately to come up with something. But nothing.

“Honestly, Alexia, unless you killed someone, I really can’t think of anything else.”

“I—” Alexia started but a choke cut off the rest of it. 

The sound came out so suddenly that it seemed to reverberate, bouncing off the walls and resounded loud in your ears. You sat up, alert, fully facing Alexia who now had her hands over her face, shielding her eyes from your view. She drew in a breath, and what she released was something shaky. 

You’d never seen her like this before, and you’d faced more than a handful of adversities together. What could possibly be making her hurt like this? Your gut twisted at the sight of her and you were filled with an overwhelming urge to take her in your arms. Instead, you settled for a light touch to her knee.

“Alexia,” you began softly, “What is it?”

Under the shield of her hand, you saw her lips quiver. Then a tear ran down her chin.

You ached at the sight but you remained silent.

“I’m—” Her lips twisted to a grimace. “I—I don’t know how it happened I just—”

Another pause.

“I like women.”

For a moment, the air stilled; almost like a vacuum had swallowed up all sounds. And then something swelled: blood rushed into your ears, and, as if life had broken a shell, a flood washed over you, filling each and every bone; and it felt a lot like hope. 

The raw sob that escaped Alexia’s throat broke you from your epiphany. She must’ve misunderstood your silence because now, she’d curled even further into herself, palms digging into her sockets. You shook yourself, mentally scolding yourself for getting distracted, before you moved closer to her.

“Oh, Alexia.” She flinched away when she felt your arms around her but you only clung tighter. “Thank you, Alexia, for trusting me with this. I want you to know that you don’t have to hide from me, that this doesn’t change anything no matter how that voice in your head might tell you otherwise. You’re still Alexia, and I—I love you all the same. I don’t hate you, I promise, and I won’t. I’ll always be here.”

When you whispered those words into her ear, she finally sagged into your embrace, turning her head so it rested, again, in the crook of your neck where she released a sob. This time, it sounded more from relief than from grief. 

There, on the couch, you held her until she fell asleep. 

“You know,” you whispered in the dark, tucking a lock of Alexia’s hair behind her ear long after she’d fallen asleep. Alexia didn’t stir, and you continued to no one in particular, “You’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

And there with your whole world in your arms, you finally allowed yourself the luxury to hope.

[7]

When you were seven, just a few months before you met Alexia, an idea dawned on you. Sick and tired of the kid’s pool, with its small and, if you were being honest, slightly unkempt water, the large one next door offered freedom—a tantalizing concept for a child. You stood at one end of that pool and found a face of determination reflected back at you. You were going to do it; you would swim across the length of the pool and make it to the other side. 

And then, you jumped in.

It took about a minute or two before your muscles started burning, hardening to a cramp with every stroke, and yet the other side didn’t look any closer. That was when it sank in; the pool was far too large. There was a brief moment when you gasped for air and remembered to swim towards the nearest edge, just like your father taught you, but by that point it was already too late.

Water rushed into your nose and mouth, bringing stinging hopelessness in their wake, clogging your throat with a muffling silence that stifled your scream.

Your father barely caught you in time.

Yes, you remembered all too well that burn in your lungs. 

If that pool was a frozen lake, what would drowning feel like? 

In Barcelona, the lakes never froze in winter. Even the westerly winds that brought the Atlantic squalls slithering under each door in the city in cold February weren’t enough to make the chill settle in. The only time your bones truly felt the bitter meaning of winter was when you’d gone to Norway to attend a relative’s funeral, and the occasion did nothing to lessen the cold. It was also the first time you’d ever stepped foot on ice, and the fear that lanced through you at the sound of the first crack—seemingly almost like a thunder out of the blue—left you rooted to the spot, fearful that a breath could put you under.

Waiting for death felt just like that; like walking on a slate of ice. 

And the aftermath? 

A drowning of a different kind.

Every phone call was a step on that thin slate of ice; every step a space closer to certainty, each one a crack on that fragile surface, another moment closer to a falling in. The thing was, death was as true as the ice giving way but no matter how inevitable the end may be, or how slow the unfurling of that mortal coil may seem, the force of the fall was no less devastating. The ice would shatter and there would be a split-second when you’d feel suspended, held by a single thread of hope for one last miracle—the only miracle that mattered—but there was no saving you from the freezing waters. 

And nobody ever told you about how quickly you would sink under; about how the cold would bite their way down to the bones while your blood sang that familiar rhythm of life, a bitter reminder of the clear division between past and present—the antecedent and the aftermath; and just how painful it would be to be stuck in-between remembering what once was and what could have been.

In that space, in that frigid depth, no amount of screaming nor air could prevent you from drowning. Without the arms of a father to save you, how could you not drown?

And the worst part?

There was no bottom to grief; you either float or sink in that frozen lake.

And Alexia sank. 

[8]

Days passed, weeks, then months; the world kept turning. Life demanded you to be present and compelled you to move forward like everyone else. And yet still, even after changing everything in its wake, grief lingered as it always did. 

There were still times when you’d catch Alexia turn from every mirror, eyes casted down almost out of fear of what she’d see. How could you look at your reflection when every bit of skin there held the reminders of what you’d lost? Every reminder brought with it a memory, and what were memories if not a mouth full of teeth? It was a mouth that took every opportunity to bare its teeth, to gnaw at that hole in your chest until the edges were raw again—like they never healed to begin with. Again and again, it bit; its teeth, painting themselves red.

But if anything could transcend time itself, it was the resilience of the human spirit. Even if her father was never far from her mind, Alexia pressed forward; now for two hearts instead of one. 

Winter ended finally, and the sun rose again. And when summer arrived, so did the news. 

“Llorens spoke with me today,” Alexia spoke over the running of the tap. You looked at her over your shoulder, she was leaning against the frame of the kitchen door. She said the next part in a tone so soft that you barely caught it.

“He said… They asked me to rejoin Barça.”

Your eyes widened and it only took you a moment before you ran to her, wrapping your arms around Alexia’s neck, while Alexia returned the embrace by putting her arms around your waist. 

“Holy shit, Alexia! That’s amazing!” You practically screamed into her ear. Pulling away to look at her, you found pride shining in her eyes but for reasons you couldn’t quite understand, there was a weight that burdened the corners of her lips. You knew just how much this meant to her, getting back into Barça, and it worried you that she wasn’t celebrating like you’d expected her to.

You asked gently, “Hey, what’s wrong?”

At that, she sighed heavily, tightening her hold around your waist as she did. She gnawed at her lower lip, brows creasing.

“You haven’t heard anything from them?”

“No,” you admitted, ignoring the twinge in your chest. “It doesn’t matter, Alexia. This is your opportunity to go back. When are you due to leave?”

“I—I told them I’d get back to them tomorrow.”

Your eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets.

“What! Alexia, what’s gotten into you?”

“I don’t want to leave you alone.”

Finally, you recognised what it was that was casting its familiar shadows in her eyes: worry. Although you were grateful that she was, it was completely unnecessary and borderline irrational. She shouldn’t throw away what she worked hard for because you couldn’t perform at the same level, and no way in hell would you let her feel bad for your own inadequacy. 

You took her face into your hands, looking into her eyes as you enunciated each word slowly.

“Alexia, listen to me. You will meet with Llorens first thing tomorrow, and you will put that pen to paper, do you hear me? And then you will leave Levante without me—” when she opened her mouth, as if to protest, you pressed a finger to her lips. “You will leave Levante without me, and you will play for Barça come this season. There are no ‘buts’ here, Alexia. You have to do this. You owe yourself that much.”

Alexia remained quiet but she looked at you with large eyes that made your heart ache the way it always did for her. 

And then, “What about you?”

“I will work twice as hard. And I will meet you there,” you whispered, losing yourself in the depth of her eyes. “I promise.”

Alexia nodded and slowly, a smile made its way onto her lips.

“You better.” She mumbled. Then she added playfully, “Now get your hands off of my face, you’ve made it all wet.”

You flashed her a devilish grin before you wiped one of your hands down her face. 

[9]

It wasn’t until a month after your first game with Barça that you saw Diana again. 

With her line of work, it was no surprise that she was an incredibly busy person. That meant her stays in Barcelona were brief enough that she couldn’t make it to any friendly hangouts the way your other friends’ partners could, only ever having the time for Alexia which was the most important thing. So when Alexia messaged the group chat last night that she and Diana would be lunching with you, Patri, Tori, and Mapi today, everyone received the news with barely hidden enthusiasm. 

And this was how you found yourself sitting at the head of the table with Patri sitting on the other end, Alexia and Diana to your left with Alexia’s arm draped casually over the back of Diana’s chair, while Mapi and Tori sat to your right. As you all waited for your food to arrive, you engaged in a light and friendly conversation. Mapi and Tori were a lethal duo when it came to jokes, almost having all of you keel over from laughter, causing the eyes of the other patrons in the restaurant to flit to your table, and you were sure you saw barely hidden amusement on the face of the waiter that served you. 

Lunch was going well—for your part especially—with all things considered. So you took this time to appreciate Alexia and Diana together just like this because you never got the chance to. And it was clear that the both of them made quite the pair; so beautiful that they almost looked untouchable. They kept their displays of affection sparse and yet the smallest of gestures held a thousand words. In Diana’s presence, Alexia seemed so happy and she had an air about her so light she was almost like the sun. 

You couldn’t help it, you smiled at the sight. Seeing Alexia like this was enough for you, and you knew this. She deserved this. If only Patri could stop eyeing you with worry, you could keep pretending that twinge in your chest didn’t exist. 

Everything was going well, but the universe—as it seemed to become accustomed to lately—was adamant to prove you wrong. Or, maybe you should’ve just crushed your feelings under foot once and for all. It was when the food arrived that things took a turn for the worse. 

When the last dish was delivered by the waiter, Tori, Patri, and Diana fell in a conversation. Mapi, you spied, was not so subtly texting someone beneath the table—Ingrid, you guessed, by the way her eyes shone and her nose crinkled in delight. Alexia on the other hand was left to fend for herself… against her food. 

After all this time, Alexia still couldn’t eat properly with chopsticks. It was definitely the bulkness of her hands that made her clumsy with the delicate tools; you’d told her as much before. You bit your tongue before you could tell her that again. Instead, you teased her.

“Are you playing with your food?”

Alexia glared at you but still, color rose to her cheeks as she grumbled. 

“Shut up. You know using these things is difficult for me.”

“Stop sulking. Besides, I already taught you before.” You rolled your eyes. Then you instructed, “Open your palm.”

She pouted but she did what you asked anyway.

“Your hands are too big so you have to hold them at the very end. Let the bottom one rest in the crook of your thumb, yes, that’s it. And hold the top like you’re writing with a pen. Loosen up a bit, you’re too tense.”

You adjusted the placement of the chopsticks slightly, “Just close your thumb over the sticks and move your—That’s it! You got it, you got it.”

With a triumphant smile, Alexia finally succeeded at her attempt to pick up her food. And when her smile curled over the food she put in her mouth, a warmth flooded the cavity of your chest. The sparkle in her eyes just then somehow made you feel like a teenager again. 

You didn’t know what it was that drew your attention to her, but your gaze flitted over to Diana. You weren’t sure what you expected; maybe that she was still talking with Patri or Tori… only she wasn’t. She was staring at you with a face set in a stoicism so neutral—her lips drawn to a careful line—that you had this unsettling feeling that she was everything but impassive. Her eyes betrayed her the most: they were sharp, barely narrowed, and there was an attentiveness in them that made you feel transparent—exposed—as if she could see right through you; as if she’d found something. 

A chill ran through you, and you shuddered internally.

Quickly, you averted your eyes back down to your meal. Developing an excessive interest in your food, you receded into yourself and tried to school your face to what you hope was impartial nonchalance. A little later when you finally felt brave enough to chance a look at Diana, you saw her talking to Patri and Tori again, laughing and smiling as if the moment between the two of you never happened.

You relaxed and you found breathing easy again. 

Maybe you were just being paranoid.

But really, you should’ve known better.

[10]

Time, with its infamous predisposition to fly, had snuck up on you. 

A blink of an eye found you stepping out of a plane in the middle of August and the next thing you knew, December only had days to breathe. Ending the year at the top of La Liga, together with your clean sheets, was nothing short of a relief. It was a testament to how you’ve integrated yourself with the team so far, but you knew enough that this shouldn’t call for complacency. In fact, it demanded the opposite; you needed to work harder especially with the match against Lyon looming closer in the horizon. 

For now though, rest was due. 

Most of your teammates had either flown themselves home or somewhere far warmer than Barcelona’s dropping temperature. For those who stayed, like you, you needed to find a way to amuse yourselves without freezing. Tonight, it seemed that the club was the unanimous choice: what better way to stay warm and have fun than to get drunk and dance? 

That was how you found yourself under flashing lights nursing your own glass while you watched the rest of your team get their freaks on from the bar. You knew Patri was already four shots down—you all had only been here an hour; Mapi and Ingrid were getting a little too cozy in a secluded corner, which you couldn’t fault them for since it was Ingrid’s last day in the city before she had to go home; Alexia had vanished with Diana to do who knew what, while Aitana and Ona were losing it on the dance floor. 

Aitana and Ona spotted you hanging out at the bar so they began to wave you over with enthusiasm. You shook your head at the display, smiling, and made to move off the counter you were leaning on when a tap on your shoulder caught your attention. But before you could turn to see who it was, a familiar voice pierced through the music. 

“I didn’t expect to see you here.”

Standing behind you was a woman; the stewardess that ushered you off your plane. Out of her work clothes and the dull setting of a plane, her beauty shone through untarnished. Gone was the sleek hairdo and instead, she’d opted to leave her hair down. Her short hair barely grazed her collarbones, you noted, and as you traced their outline, you found the piercing in her sternum glinting in silent invitation. She was wearing a simple black dress that revealed just enough of her chest to entice, the thin fabric of it accentuating the curves of her waist, and it stopped just halfway down the length of her thighs to reveal the intricate lines of floral tattoos on her side. 

Finally catching yourself, you tore your eyes away and found her gaze. What you found reflected in them was amusement and you tried to stop your cheeks from burning. 

As casually as you could, you said, “Oh, hey, it’s you. I… actually never caught your name.”

“Micah,” she replied, extending out a hand. You took it as you told her yours. She leaned on the bar, waved the bartender over who gave her the drink she asked for, and took a sip. Then she turned back to you. 

“You know, I never expected to see you again. And in a gay club, of all places.”

“Why not a gay club?” You asked with a small laugh.

She shrugged, one corner of her mouth quirking up almost sheepishly.

“I may have searched your name up after I met you. No history of relationships, just multiple pictures of you with the same guy. I thought he’s your boyfriend, so.”

“Is it a guy with curly hair?”

“Yeah.”

At that you let out another small laugh.

“That’s Guille, my best friend. He’s like a brother.”

“Oh.” Micah’s cheeks flushed. 

You gave her a grin, “Yeah. But just to clarify, I am, in fact, into women. Exclusively.”

As if a switch has been flipped, Micah’s demeanour shifted, eyes now smouldering. The change affected you in ways you didn’t anticipate and with your slight height over her, it became difficult to keep your eyes where they should be, especially when the silver glint of her piercing tempted your eyes downwards. But just as the alcohol had thinned your blood, your self-control frayed all the same; your eyes roamed down to her cleavage which you admired briefly, before you met her gaze again.

That seemed to be the signal Micah was looking for because she stepped into your space, her drink now sitting forgotten on the counter. She dragged her fingers up your arm, all the way to your exposed collarbone where she traced the skin there while she watched you with dark eyes, her plump lip between her teeth. 

You shivered; she was so close now that the heat of her body washed over you. 

“Really? Prove it, then.” Micah whispered, ghosting her lips over yours.

You leaned forward when she pulled back slightly, as if magnetized to her lips. Then you asked, “How?”

“Dance with me.”

She dragged you to the dancefloor and you let yourself be swept away in the sea of bodies moving to the same rhythm. And then the both of you danced, her body against yours, your hands tracing her outlines as you pulled her closer as she did the same to you. 

Time blurred into a singularity after that but it existed again when, at one point, Micah took your cheek into her palm to pull you down for a kiss. Her lips were searing hot when they branded yours that you couldn’t help but gasp and moan into them, a sound which Micah gladly swallowed. 

It had been a while since you’d been touched and you didn’t realise just how much you missed it: the skim of skin over skin, the languidness of your blood turning to molten rush; how you missed the deprivation of air from your lungs and the delicious ache that came with it. And how you missed touching another. Your hands sought the exposed skin of her back, relishing the softness beneath your palms as you settled them there, respectfully just above her ass, to pull her in, flushed to your body.

She sighed and she looped her arms around your neck; deeper, hotter.

And in the heat, you lost yourself. 

You couldn’t remember how the both of you made it to your apartment, only that she ended up on top of you, head between your legs as you gasped out her name in the dark. And when she braced herself against her elbow, her other hand working you over the edge once more, you couldn’t help but note how beautiful she was with her curtain of brown hair, her lips slightly parted, eyes shining in the dark.

And when you came on her fingers with her lips on yours, you had a nagging feeling that this felt a lot like when you were nineteen. 

[11]

Clutching your head, you tried to soothe the remnants of your hangover as you headed over the door. You squinted at the light that shone through when you opened it and when the blob in front of you assumed a semblance of familiarity, you croaked out a question.

“Alexia? What’re you doing here?”

“Wow, you look like you’ve been hit by a truck.” Alexia teased but when you glared at her, she finally answered your question. She lifted her hand and that was when you noticed what she was holding. “Got your jacket. You left it at the club last night.”

You blinked at her, eyes still squinted, and enunciated each word slowly. “You drove all the way here. To drop off my jacket.”

She nodded.

“And you couldn’t have waited until dinner tonight?”

“Nope. The jacket was of utmost priority, obviously. Second priority, of course, is to check that you haven’t dropped dead yet. Third, to make sure you show up at dinner on time.” Alexia stepped back and gave you a once-over. “And by the looks of it, you need more than just a check up.” 

“Fuck you.” 

At that, her brows only creased as she threw her head back to laugh. 

“Rough morning, huh?” 

“I’m glad you find my hangover amusing.” You grunted, turning to shuffle back into the kitchen to make the coffee you were about to prepare before a clown interrupted you. “Close the door, you’re letting all the heat out.”

“Okay, Grumpy.” Alexia said behind you and you heard the door close. A rustle of fabric, and then, “Go drink some water and maybe then you can actually hold a conversation.”

You rolled your eyes even though she couldn’t see your face. 

“Shut up. I’ve only been awake for an hour.” 

“Sure.” Alexia dragged out her answer like she believed what you just said—she didn’t.

You turned on the coffee machine and pressed the button for a double shot. The sound of whirring filled the air.

“You want some coffee?” You asked, looking at Alexia over your shoulder who you found was not-so-subtly craning her neck to look down the hall. When she saw you looking at her, Alexia flashed you a questioning look.

“Are we alone or… ?” Alexia trailed off but before she could finish the question, you nodded. She walked to the counter and picked an apple from the fruit bowl.

“Oh, okay, good. And no, thanks, I already had a shot before I left home this morning.” 

You returned to your coffee, placing the cup aside so you could prepare the milk. 

Beside you, you heard the running of the tap and then a rustling of clothes followed by a slight thump. From the corner of your eye, you spied Alexia leaning against the counter. 

You just finished pouring the milk into your cup when you heard Alexia hum before the unmistakable bite to the flesh of an apple. Lifting the cup, you took a sip and welcomed the bitterness of caffeine on your tongue. 

“You know,” Alexia started, “you never told me you liked women.”

You froze. 

The lingering euphoria from last night—along with the excitement from Micah’s proposal for a next time when she left early this morning—immediately vanished. There was something about the nonchalant way that Alexia got you; it cut you deep. And the wounds you thought were long healed now bled through their stitches. A dot of coffee stained the white countertop, followed by another, and before your cup slipped from your grip, you put it down and pressed your shaking hands flat on the countertop. 

“What?” Your tone was tame but you were everything but. Pressure rose in your veins because how dared she. How dared she.

“I’m not mad or anything, I’m just surprised that’s all.” Alexia laughed lightly but the sound grated at your ears. 

“Was that a recent development? Did you find that out in the States?” Then she continued with a bit of guilt seeping through her voice. “If you found out before you moved to Angel City, I hope I never made you feel as though you couldn’t share that with me. And if I did, then I’m—”

“Please, don’t insult me, Alexia.”

As if finally detecting the ice in your tone, you saw her head turn towards you from the corner of your eye, but you made no move to look at her. 

 “I’m not insulting you. It’s just–I’m a terrible friend for never seeing the signs and that I couldn’t be there for you.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” You scoffed but it sounded more like a choked sob than anything. The world blurred before you and you watched as your tears mixed with the coffee stains on the counter. 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Came Alexia’s concerned voice before you heard a rustling of clothes, and then the touch to your shoulder. The reaction of your body was visceral: you stumbled back as you slapped her hand away as if she’d burnt you.

“Don’t touch me!” Heat pricked around the skin where she’d touch you, and you felt as if something was crawling beneath. “Get out.”

“What?”

Finally, you looked her in the eye and the force of the movement made your tears fall. Alexia stood there frozen, mouth agape, eyes wide and brows knotted in horror. You couldn’t care less; looking at her hurt and you wanted her out of your apartment—now. 

“I said leave.”

Alexia ran a frustrated hand through her hair and she pleaded, “Tell me what I did!”

“Get out, Alexia!” 

She opened her mouth, stopped midway, and finally shook her head. With one last look at you, she turned for the door but before she stepped out, she turned back to you. She sighed then said in a small voice.

“I don’t know what happened but I’m sorry anyway. I… I’ll see you tonight.”

With that, the door closed. At the click of the lock, you slid down to the floor; your back against the surface of the cabinets with Alexia’s half-eaten apple by your feet. 

She really did forget, didn’t she? And you were the only one who remembered because between the two of you, it was only you who cared enough to latch onto the memory. She didn’t care, and you doubted she ever did to begin with. Why did you think otherwise? Why?

Your face fell into your hands, and you sobbed. 

Stupid.

You were so fucking stupid. 

[swordsmans]

hello, sorry to bother! I'm not sure how to start this, but I just wanted to say that I have thought abt Freight for /years/. I happened to stumble on my subscription to it from literally 10 years ago and figured I'd check your profile to see if you're still writing! and I was so pleasantly surprised to find you still kickin' and creating :') I remember finding Freight when it was still on chapter 2 and how closely I followed your updates. it was the first fic I can remember ever becoming invested in- like... I used to sit in bed at night and think about your au and all the parts in it! those versions of the characters- /your/ versions- were so near and dear to my heart as a young teen, and even 10 years later, I still think about your fic all the time.

I guess I just wanted to take the time to say that you have made a lasting impression on someone. the stuff you create matters. YOU matter. this story will forever be a part of me, I'm sure of it, and I am so grateful to have those fond memories of your story!! I still think about it all the time, and before tonight, I've always wondered if you continued writing and sharing your talent with the world. I'm genuinely relieved to see that you're still in this world, my friend :] and that you never stopped creating.

I wish nothing but the best for you- All the good fortune, happiness, and peace to you <3

hi hey hello howdy :3

first of all, you're not a bother. if you're not sure how to start, then i'm sure as hell not sure how to respond! full disclosure, I've been sitting on this ask for almost five months now, and--well, when i read it, i cried. and every time ive sat down to respond after, ive also cried. i am (in fact) a bit weepy right now, but im going to lean into it. ironic detachment humor is OUT and genuine emotional engagement with the things that move us is IN and i printed this out and im going to put it on my wall

this is a gift. you are a gift. thank you so much for reading my work, and thank you so much for stopping by to share your love with me. freight is twelve years old now and thats insane to think about. i wrote before but it's the story that made me a writer and it will always be something im so proud of (and owe so much to) even if it will never be finished in its current state.

i think all writers, authors, creatives, whoever create to communicate something through their work--it's different for everyone, but no one makes purposeless art. every story is unique, but I've always written for the same reason: because life is big and hard and empty, and i am terrified of being alone. maybe it's self-aggrandizing but to know that you can still, like, hear my voice a decade later--that i wasn't a teenager yelling into the void because i was scared, that someone was there to listen--and that they're not alone still, that part of me, because youre still listening to that voice, to me, because even if im older i'll always be an accumulation of everything ive always been. i cant articulate it. or--i could, but then this reply would be a thousand paragraphs long. so just. like. thank you.

thank you for reading my stuff, and for loving it, and for reaching out after so many years just to say hello. im sixteen and crying, and im twenty-eight and crying, and yeah it was fanfic but it was art, and it was real, and it had a purpose, we're both still here to remember it, and that's everything.

[hyunnieshannie]

EX | HJ

PREVIOUS ꕀ❀ꕀ SERIES MASTER LIST ꕀ❀ꕀ NEXT

Chapter 5: 9 Leebits in a trench coat.

Pairing: Han Jisung x AFAB. Reader

Word Count: 2108

General Synopsis: Your ex? Shitty. Your family? Worse. Your best friend? Left for a tour in the middle of one of the worst times of your life. How are you meant to deal with planning what should have been your wedding, dealing with your family, and pretending like you're not falling apart all on your own?

General Warnings: Idol!Jisung, mentions of other Idols (P1Harmony/Seventeen), all views on these idols are purely fictional. Idol AU. Mentions of cheating, mentions of smoking and drug use (weed and cigarettes), Mentions of drinking, angst, self esteem issues, depression. Y/N is older than Jisung. (I'm sorry for the jokes that come out of this) (any tags I missed please feel free to let me know! More tags to be added as the story goes on.) A/N: Smaller chapter, it will pick up soon I've had terrible writers block but im FINALLY back with an update for this <3 pls enjoy and let me know your current thoughts on Leah <3

“So he finally talked to you about it?” Keeho laughs as he stares into the camera, “Jheez I honestly thought he was gonna continue torturing himself over it,” 

“Yeah I mean, he was really upset over it dude. I don’t know why he’d feel so upset over it, it wasn’t even his fault,” you sigh. It had been a few days since Jisung had spoken to you about why he had been so distant, but though you had originally thought you’d feel better by him talking to you; you’d managed to make yourself feel worse. You felt bad that he had felt shitty about the situation, it wasn’t his fault any of it happened yet he still felt bad. How were you expected not to feel bad about it? You made your friends worry, and worse he had felt so bad that he hid himself away for a few weeks. 

“Probably because he cares a lot about you, I’d have felt the same if I were in his shoes, plus there's the whole rant he went on with me about it.” 

“Wait what?” 

“Yeah he was going on about I left you to him, and he feels bad he’s not doing enough, he just wants to make you happy and all that shit,” Keeho looks at you confused as he tilts his head to allow the stylist to adjust a few things on him. “I’m glad he talked to you though, honestly he needs to learn to be more open with his feelings, can’t let a pretty girl get him all flustered like that.” Keeho scoffs, “I mean how does the man survive on tour?” you laugh loudly at the remark. 

“Please Kee, flustered?” you giggle, “Stressed is the better word!” 

“No, flustered is the correct one you dimwit. Or did he not tell you about how he-” 

“Kee it’s time to go.” Taeyang appears on the screen waving to you, before turning back to Keeho. He simply nods and turns back to you, 

“We’ll continue this later,” he smiles, 

“Have fun out there!” you smile, 

“Have a fun morning Y/N, I’ll call you when I can!” and with that he was gone, and you were back to working on your track. You had only woken up this early to get a chance to talk to him, and the conversation was nice. You missed your best friends and talking to them was nice. Though most of the time it would be a quick conversation, and interrupted ninety eight percent of the time it was still nice to see them. 

Your morning mainly consisted of finishing up a song you had been working on for months, and finalizing the vocals for the song you had worked on with Changbin. In all it was a busy morning until noon when you’d have to begin getting ready for a meeting with Leah. After a few arguments with your family you had given in to meeting with her to discuss the dress you'd wear as her maid of honor because for some unknown reason she had decided you’d be staying in that role. You didn’t have to plan anything, the planner had that all down, but still it felt more and more as a chore rather than a joyous event. 

ꕀ❀ꕀ

“Y/N. You cannot just leave your sister like this, are you stupid?” 

“Mom, I'm not leaving her? She picked a fight with me in front of my-”

“Your little friends crushed her that day Y/N how could you let that happen? You are her older sister, you are supposed to be there for her!” Your mother scolded you, of course you knew you had to be there for her but no one ever seemed to listen to the concerns you had. No one ever saw the fault Leah had, and always pinned the blame on you because you’re the older one, you’re supposed to be more responsible, and Leah was their perfect little angel who could do absolutely no wrong. 

“Mom-” 

“Y/N you fix this shit with your sister, I’m not going to let you ruin her big day like this. So get your shit together or else” you could picture the face she was making, a mixture of disappointment and anger. That look in her eyes that would tell you that everything was your fault. 

ꕀ❀ꕀ

As you sat in the coffee shop awaiting Leah’s arrival, you spent time texting Changbin who’d been asking about how the song was coming along. You laughed as he joked about how if you kept tweaking the song it would become an entirely new one,

Gym Bro [12:04 pm] Hear me out tho

You [12:04 pm] Listening

Gym Bro [12:05 pm] What if you just post the song? 

You [12:06pm] Are you crazy? It’s not finished? 

Gym Bro [12:06 pm] It’s a good song as is, in your ears it’s never going to be perfect. This is why we have people to review things. If you’re really unsure, let me, Ji, and Chan listen to the full thing and give you some advice on what could be improved. Like I said, if you keep doing it yourself you’ll never think it’s good enough. 

You [12:08 pm] Damn you got deep there ;)

Gym Bro [12:08 pm] Oh my god, why are you like this?

You [12:08 pm] I’m joking! But yeah maybe I’ll let you guys just listen to it, but maybe not Chan. 

Gym Bro [12:09 pm] THE FUCK YOU MEAN NOT CHAN? He’s probably the best one to listen to the track?

You [12:11 pm] You know exactly why.

You sigh as you look at the time, Leah is well over fifteen minutes late for the ‘scheduled’ meeting the two of you made. As much as it did help not seeing her for now, you’d rather just get it fully over with as quick as possible. Your phone buzzed once more, as the sound of the bell jingling rang throughout the cafe. Leah had finally arrived.

“Sister!” she exclaimed as she rushed towards your table, “How have you been my sweet?” your body cringed at the nickname. How could she act so sweet to you after everything? Brushing it off you force a smile to her as she pulls you into a hug. 

“Alright, just working and you?” you give her an award winning smile, that would truly convince anyone in the cafe that the two of you were truly happy to see each other. 

“Stressed, but you know how it is; planning a wedding and such.” Leah smirks at you, “Or I mean, you have heard of the stress.” 

“I’m sure your planner has got it under control.” You sigh as you sit back down in your chair, swirling the spoon in your coffee as a way to distract yourself from the impending sense of doom building up in your stomach. You watch as the black coffee swirls around in the cup as the silence between Leah and yourself becomes thicker, the honey in which you had put in your coffee had fully melted and dissolved long before her arrival and yet you stirred as if it had been freshly placed. A part of you wished you could slip a shot of something into it, because dealing with Leah required a level of intoxication that would help on drowning out her annoying whines and complaints. Bailey’s would be nice, no. Something stronger, whiskey. That would help. You thought to yourself,

“Anyways listen, what I was thinking for the bridesmaids would be something light pink, and for you I’d have you in something darker to stand out more from them. Unless, you want to blend in with them.” Leah began, “You do have a terrible habit of being unnoticeable so, I think something more bold would be best.” you couldn’t tell what kind of statement that was. Rude at best. “Nothing too bold though, I can’t have you taking any sort of attention away from me.” 

“I thought I was unnoticeable,” you scoff as you bring your coffee to your lips, the now cold liquid sliding down with ease as you take a sip. Leah shakes her head, before bringing her binder out of her bag.

“Anyways, I don’t have time to explain every little thing to you; also you never actually answered the Save The Date, so I just marked you down that you’re coming alone seeing as you definitely don’t have the time to find a date, seeing as you’re much too invested in your…song, or apparently still being in love with my fiance to start looking for someone new.” Something about her assumption threw you off, you choked on your coffee as you looked up at her smiling down at you as if she had something against you, “Honestly it really is awkward that you’re still into him. You need to get over it please y/n.” the statement almost had you spitting your coffee back out at her, her look feigning innocence began to cause your blood to boil. Your cheeks heating up as you set your mug back down. 

“I have a date.” you mutter, as she gives you wide eyes. “I’m over him Leah, no need to worry.” 

“Fantastic! And who is this date of yours, I can mark him down now so that I can give the list to my planner.” Leah tilts her head, awaiting an answer. Truthfully you hadn’t thought of who you’d bring as a date, but her statements today lead you to say something you hadn’t fully thought through. 

“My RSVP is in the mail, I’m sure you’ll enjoy the surprise.” it was not. 

“Splendid, I’m excited to see who this mystery man is!” Leah laughs, standing from her seat. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have an appointment to alter my dress today.” 

“You chose your dress already?” 

“Yes, and sorry love. But no matter what you say that dress looked too good on me to pass up. So, yeah.” with that Leah throws her purse and tote over her shoulder and begins to leave. “I’ll send you the name of the shop to find your dress! Love ya!” and then she was gone. 

ꕀ❀ꕀ

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck” You yell into the pillow as Mini sits at the edge of the bed. Of course you just had to go and let Leah get under your skin and say something stupid. “What do I do? I don’t have a date? And Now she’s expecting me to RSVP within this week because my dumbass said it was already in the mail!” 

“Calm down and breathe dude,” Mini sighs, “Finding a date won’t be all that hard,” 

“Easy for you to say, all you have to do is look at Hyune and he’s following you to the ends of the earth. I on the other hand do not have anyone that would do so. Nor anyone readily available to play boyfriend so that I don’t have to deal with Leah’s stupid fucking behaviour.” You complain, 

“You act like we don’t have eight men ready to help you out at any moment.” Mini laughs, “I’m sure any of them would be glad to ‘play’ boyfriend for a night!” 

“Min your math isn’t mathing.” 

“What do you mean by that?” she gives you a confused look, 

“Hyune is taken so that's minus one, so are Bin, Chan, Lix and Minho. So that’s three left. AND I’m not really willing to put Minnie and Innie through that pain and Ji’s already felt like shit because of Leah so he’s out of the question too-” 

“Well I guess your only option is to bring nine leebits stacked in a trenchcoat, at least then they’d be taller than you.” Mini laughs, as she throws the plush toy at you, 

“That is so oddly specific… how do you know nine is-”

“Listen there are a lot of things you do not want to know, and my skzoo abuse is part of that, anyways there's absolutely no harm in asking them is all I’m saying, and we both know ALL of them would help, it’s just how they are.” you contemplated the idea, sure bringing one of them to the wedding isn’t a terrible idea in itself, but the idea of having any of those boys endure Leah was enough to make your entire body cringe. If Taeyang or Stephen had been around for sure, you’d drag them to it. They already knew how she was; and more specifically how to cope with her constant need for attention.

Tag List

@alyszaen @channiesbub @dugarzaddy @fairywriter-oracle @skzloveforever @neohyxn @chaotickyrith @lemonadencran @raven-skz95 @chanlixiiee @awkwardnesshabitat @drhsthl @katsukis1wife @mysticalexpertwinneralien @hanniejisimp @jaebaebaegot7

[broccoliboix5peepeeman]

Midoriya-sensei AU

Chapter 12: Sports Day

I've decided I'm going to officially change updates to the 15th of every month, because I just don't have to time to post twice a month considering the chapters seem to be getting longer (who's fault could that be? ^^') and I don't want to disappoint

Also, I made a POLL regarding a minor side plot, so let me know if you're interested or not!

Part 11 | Ao3 | Part 13

[Sunday 8th October]

Me [1812]: I'm sorry im watching ths news and.erm did you jut use YOUR FIRE???

Me [1813]: Thats so amazing you look great I'm so proud of you!

Me [1814]: I will be screaming to you about this next time I see you but for now I'll just scream over text

Me [1814]: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1833]: 🔥

***

Izuku, understandably, felt extra excited when he walked into work Monday morning. It had been over a week and not only had Shoto taken what he’d said to heart, but he’d actually started training his fire!

Initially, Izuku had been concerned—Shoto’s replies had been slow and abrupt since their hangout, and Fuyumi had even noticed that he’d been staying back at the agency later than usual—but after his friend’s shift yesterday evening, a phone call had quickly put those worries to rest. It turned out that Shoto had simply spent the past week training his left side; he’d even called for private coaching from Eraserhead and Endeavour, the latter of which was surprising but logical.

‘He’s not a complete bastard wank anymore, and what good is my father if I can’t take advantage of his knowledge?’ He could practically hear the shrug in Shoto’s voice. ‘He was pretty helpful, and Eraser was his usual brutal self. I learnt a lot.’

‘I’m really glad!’ Izuku’s cheeks hurt from smiling. ‘So you’re feeling more confident?’

‘The past week’s been hell, and I still have a lot of catching up to do, but yeah.’ A pause. ‘I feel confident to begin using my… my fire, in the field.’

Izuku honestly couldn’t wait to see Shoto’s growth. He was already so proud of his friend, and he knew his family would be too, especially Rei. It was a huge step—he was going to need to compile a new notebook dedicated solely to Shoto's left side.

He was still grinning about it, even as he walked across the field, setting up the obstacle course for the students.

Part of Izuku was also thankful for the timing, as Shoto's news was what was currently suppressing the anxiety bubbling in his stomach. After all, today was sports day, and while the event was typically one of his favourites in the academic calendar, they were also using it to implement their last minute plan to help Hiru.

They couldn't afford for anything to go wrong.

‘Hey.’ Fuyumi walked over, smiling gently. She’d already finished helping one of the other teachers set up the beanbag toss. ‘How’re you doing?’

‘Ask me again in approximately eight hours.’ He chuckled humorlessly as he lined up the tunnels, before positioning the skipping ropes on the other side. 'I'll be honest, I'm feeling a nervous poop coming.'

'You sound like Natsuo.' She snorted, immediately reaching down to help him with the equipment.

‘I’ll take that as a complement.’ He stuck his tongue out in response. ‘Thanks.’

His lower body grumbled with discomfort and he pulled a face. ‘Once this is finished, I’ll pop over. Just the sacks left after this.’

‘Don’t worry about it, I’ll finish off here.’ Despite her kindness, there was an assertive air to her voice which told Izuku that she wasn’t accepting no for an answer.

That was fine with him.

‘Really? Thank you! You’re the best honestly!’ He immediately dropped everything and ran to the building. Once inside, he beelined for the staff toilets. ‘Thank fuck…’

Once he was finished, Izuku checked his phone to find that it was only a few minutes before the first bell. Luckily, his classroom wasn’t too far. Anxiety still lingered in his body—he suspected it would for the duration of the school day—but it wasn’t overwhelming; he still smiled brightly as he greeted his students and took the register, before leading them to the assembly hall. They had all come to school in their PE kits, so it was rather amusing to see them wearing their usual school shoes instead of their trainers, due to being inside.

Izuku then took his place next to Fuyumi, like clockwork, and the two of them watched the other students filter in.

‘Did you get sorted okay?’

‘Yeah, all good.’ She shrugged. ‘Did you have a good poop?’

‘Y’know, I’m still not sure… but I certainly needed it.’ He answered shamelessly. There wasn’t really a filter between them at this point—they’d seen their students do more horrifying things over the years.

The Head soon began with the usual topics—reminding the faculty about the HQA information session that was coming up in a few weeks—before he eventually brought up the giant elephant in the room.

‘I can practically hear you all vibrating with excitement, even without my quirk, so no point delaying. As you’re aware, today is sports day!' He paused while the students cheered. 'This year, however, we’ve put a special twist on it…’

Usually, grades were kept separate—the two classes competing against each other—but this time, there would be four distinct teams: Lemillion, consisting of classes 2B, 3A and 4B; Dynamite, including classes 2A, 3B and 4B; Shoto, of which Fuyumi’s class, 1B, was a part of, as well as 5B and 6A; and All Might, encompassing the final three classes—Izuku had been fierce in his demand to be put on the latter team. So, while each grade would still go around each activity together as a whole, the allotted points they’d accumulate went to their designated teams.

That meant that Hiru and his antagonists had to rely on each other to win, and the prize was a trophy for each winning class.

The formal reason behind the team set-up was to encourage the different grades to support each other and build a rapport. Hopefully, it might also allow certain individuals to reflect on their differences.

Hopefully.

‘Now that you all have your teams, it’s time for the schedule.’ The Head brought up the next powerpoint side, showing a table. ‘Some of you will notice that your homeroom teacher is running an activity. That is why each grade will walk around together. So, for example, grade one will follow Todoroki-sensei, while Midoriya-sensei runs the obstacle course. Make sense?'

A sea of heads immediately bobbed up and down.

The Head smiled. 'Great! Now, your teacher will also have a copy of the schedule, so there's no need to memorise it…'

There were a few more minutes of technicalities—a few kids clearly becoming impatient—before everyone was finally released. While Fuyumi gathered their students together, Izuku quickly made his way back out to the field, along with a few other teachers. Some parents were already congregating around the activities, eager to support their kids. He smiled in greeting and exchanged pleasantries with a few, but otherwise remained silent as he waited.

He rocked back and forth on his feet, imagining all the different outcomes of the day. Hiru was the fastest runner in his grade—probably the older ones too—due to his quirk. That was why they’d deliberately scheduled the whole school for the relay race at the end of the day. That way, they could set it up so each team could cheer each other on for the final event.

His thoughts were interrupted before he could truly get lost in them, as a flock of children suddenly swarmed the field.

There were five other events, not including the obstacle course and relay. Tug of war was fairly self-explanatory, as was dance; along with the bean bag toss—throw as many beanbags into your team’s basket as possible before the time runs out—and the cavalry battle. Admittedly though, the latter wouldn’t be as impressive as UA’s infamous cavalry battle due to the lack of quirk usage.

The event that was often the most confusing for foreign students was oodama, but that was just because of the name, which was just “giant ball”. Essentially, each team had to carry a giant inflatable ball together to the goal point; if they dropped it, they’d have to start again. Izuku really hoped Hiru had brought along his personalised cover for his quills, otherwise they might have some issues with that one.

‘Namaste, Midoriya-sensei!’

He smiled as the sixth graders surrounded him, all bowing simultaneously. They were the year below his previous homeroom class—when he’d had India for global month—so naturally, they’d all joined in during the legendary “Namaste phase” and made sure not to let it die out entirely.

Indulging them, he put his palms together and bowed.

‘Namaste, bachche! How're you all doing?'

He snorted when they immediately began speaking over each other—clearly excited—and waited until they’d all calmed down before taking them through the usual rules. There would be six races, with roughly ten students per race. Then, the winner of each race would enter the final, and points would be assigned based on their placement.

It wasn’t too difficult considering the sixth graders had already done the course before—with just a few minor changes—but once they’d moved on, his next group was the first graders.

‘Hey, Sensei!’ His students greeted excitedly. ‘We just did our dance routine!’

‘Did you?’ He gasped. ‘How did it go?’

‘It went really well!’ Hana jumped up and down. ‘Our parents all watched as well, which was super fun! Okaasan took pictures!’

‘We didn’t win though.’ Haku pouted, crossing his arms as class B joined them.

‘It was really close!’ Fuyumi tried to placate. ‘You were all really good! Like professional dancers!’

‘Like Pinky?’ Izuku offered, knowing his students would appreciate the comparison. When Fuyumi quickly agreed, they brightened up significantly, and he explained the rules.

It ended up being a close one, but after the first set of races, the finalists were decided: four from class B and two from A. Luckily though, Hiru and Touta managed to bag the top two spots, bringing the scores to a tie as they went off to the next activity. Izuku waved farewell as he quickly prepared everything for the second graders.

By the time lunch came around and the scores were tallied, team All Might were in joint second with Dynamight, while team Shoto was in the lead. It was pretty close, which was to be expected—especially to build suspense and competition—but it still made Izuku nervous.

His leg was twitching.

'Stop overthinking.' Fuyumi nudged him from where they were sitting: a picnic bench in the playground, as the children played around them. 'We've set everything in motion, it's up to the kids now.'

'I know.' He sighed, exasperated. 'But I'm a worrier!'

'And I'm not?' She scoffed with a laugh. 'Come on. There's nothing else you can do for now.'

'Only because I haven't thought of something yet.' He argued weakly.

Maybe there was some way he could figure out a plan to have the different grades work together, or set up an ethical way to jeopardise-

‘Nope. Not going there.' Fuyumi interjected, before slurping up more noodles. He must've been staring at his bento for too long and mumbling out loud. 'Tell you what, I'll change the subject. How was your weekend?’

Not even subtle… but Izuku chose to take the bait. Worrying made his stomach hurt.

‘Pretty uneventful…’ He shrugged, using his chopsticks to move his food around. Despite his best efforts, he couldn't quite keep the smile from his face as his mind recalled a certain hero. ‘Y’know, other than the obvious. You?’

‘Yeah, I was pretty much the same.’ She laughed halfheartedly. 'You really must be nervous for Hiru, considering you haven't even brought up Shoto until now, and that was with some prompting.'

'I've just not had the time to properly gush about it.' He placed a hand over his chest, then eyed his friend cautiously. 'Plus, I wanted to check first: how're you feeling about it?'

She flashed him a grateful smile, then shook her head affectionately.

'It's… I'm feeling hopeful, I think.' She pursed her lips, pondering. ‘It was just… surprising, to say the least. As you know, we were all concerned about him the past week, but then, before he went to work yesterday, he told us to keep an eye on the news and promised that it was nothing bad…' Her tone turned sarcastic. 'That didn't worry us at all.’

‘Of course.’

‘So we kept the tv on during dinner, then all of a sudden, okaasan called my name, and I rushed in, and on the screen was Shoto using his fire to catch a villain, like some kind of fever dream!’

She hesitated then; Izuku tilted his head to the side.

‘Was that good or bad?’

‘Oh, definitely good!’ She was quick to clarify, then looked down at her noodles in thought. ‘We just… never expected it. Shoto had always been so against using it in combat. Something must’ve happened.’

She paused and slowly looked up to meet Izuku’s eyes. ‘Hang on.’

He chuckled nervously.

Her eyes narrowed. ‘You never said what your argument was about when you hung out at the house, just that you disagreed on something. Come on, spill.’

As she looked at him expectantly, Izuku tapped his index fingers together and bounced his legs under the table.

‘He kinda… told me about why he didn’t use his fire, so I kinda… to sum it up, basically called him immature and explained why he was being dumb.’

‘Izuku!’

‘I know, it was stupid, I don’t know what I was doing. I guess I was just…’ He faltered. His phone buzzed in his pocket, but he ignored it. 'I was just…'

‘Being your usual self.’ Fuyumi eventually finished for him, causing him to look at her quizzically. ‘He’s needed telling for years, but he’s stubborn and all of us were afraid of the consequences. Our family’s been through so much, we didn’t want to risk breaking it again.’

She sighed. ‘After everything that happened, I think he’d resigned himself to not using his left side… because otherwise he’d have to admit to not “giving it his all” against Touya. He didn't "try hard enough" to save him, if that makes sense?’

‘I didn’t think about that.’ Izuku murmured, guilt immediately washing over him as he slapped his forehead. ‘Of course he feels responsible for what happened, and I was so insensitive.’

He groaned, twitching as he recalled the argument. He made several more little noises of annoyance and shook his head. Fuck, it’s a wonder he doesn’t hate me…

Fuyumi regarded him carefully, chewing the inside of her cheek. She was used to his stimming by now, so didn't mention it, which he was thankful for.

‘I don’t know what you said specifically.’ She began slowly. ‘But whatever it was… it worked, so don’t beat yourself up too much like I know you’re currently doing.’

‘You know me too well.’ Izuku snorted. 'Gahhh, I just… he looked so sad and angry.'

‘He’s been sad and angry for a while, but he used to be worse.’ She conceded, but her tone wasn't accusatory. ‘Therapy has done most of the work to get him where he is today, but he’s always been so adamant about his fire… until now. You don’t need to feel bad for telling him what he needed to hear, promise.’

Izuku tightened his lips and searched her expression.

‘Are you really sure?’

She snorted.

‘If Shoto hated you, you’d know it by now.’ She told him simply. ‘Has he messaged you today?’

Izuku paused.

‘Well, yeah... He wanted to wish me luck.’

‘See?’

‘All right, all right, fine.’ Izuku smiled despite himself, as he took his phone out of his pocket. ‘It was really thoughtful-’

He paused when he realised Shoto had actually messaged him a few minutes ago.

‘Yeah, he fretted over the wording for ten minutes this morning.’ Fuyumi divulged—Izuku doubted her brother wanted him to know that little bit of information—before taking a sip from her drink. ‘So you’ve got nothing to worry about… and I know that smile, you’re looking at his messages, aren’t you?’

‘Hush.’ He stuck his tongue out, but before he could unlock his phone, one of his students suddenly appeared at his side. ‘Oh, hello, Nagisa-chan.’

‘Hi.’ She swung her arms out. ‘What happens when you die?’

Fuyumi choked on her drink, while Izuku just took a moment to process the question.

‘Erm… me specifically, or just people?’ Despite asking for clarification, the answer would remain the same: he didn’t have a clue.

‘Well, is it different for you?’ She tilted her head to the side.

Point taken.

‘I’ll be honest, Nagisa-chan, I’m not sure.’ He admitted. ‘That’s the thing about dying… you can’t really come back and let everyone know what happens.’

‘What about people who die and then they come back to life with the electric oven gloves.’

Izuku’s left eye twitched.

‘You mean a defibrillator?’ He asked, slowly.

‘I like my name better.’

‘Yeah, me too.’ Fuyumi chipped in.

Izuku hoped the name comment would distract her from the question, but alas, Nagisa continued to stare at him expectantly.

‘Er… well, I guess if they’re brought back to life, they couldn’t have been truly dead?’

‘Even Jesus?’

‘Do you… believe in Jesus?’

‘Not really.’ She sighed, looking over at where some students were playing hopscotch. ‘So what DOES happen when you die?’

Izuku bit his lip to prevent any muttering—he could go to various lengths about different religions and their beliefs, along with potential theories—but figured no one would appreciate that.

‘What do you think happens?’ He asked instead.

‘Hmmm.’ She placed a contemplative hand on her chin. ‘Probably… if you’re a good person, you turn into a dog or maybe a butterfly, but if you’re bad, you turn into… a wasp.’

‘A wasp?’

‘Yeah. No one likes wasps.’

‘What about good people who don’t like dogs?’ Fuyumi asked.

‘I guess… then maybe you turn into your favourite animal if you’re good.’ She twirled some of her hair around her finger. ‘And if you’re bad, you turn into something you don’t like.’

‘I can get behind that.’ Izuku agreed, then finally asked what had been on his mind since the start of the interaction. ‘What made you ask the question?’

‘My goldfish died last night.’ Nagisa pouted. ‘Okaasan flushed Floella down the toilet.’

‘That’s sad.’ Izuku frowned.

‘Yes, very.’ She put the hair she was playing with in her mouth and started chewing. ‘Anyway, see you later, sensei.’

Before he could say anything else, she sprinted off to join those playing hopscotch.

‘That was lovely.’ Fuyumi commented, as the two of them watched her go.

‘I think I have whiplash.’ Izuku deadpanned, before finally looking at his phone.

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1239]: Hope it’s going well

Me [1250]: So far so good! How’s work?

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1251]: On my lunch now, so can’t complain

‘Mei-chan, don’t you dare put that worm in your mouth!’ Fuyumi suddenly shouted, before bolting off towards the aforementioned student. ‘It’s every other day with this girl.’

Izuku snorted, then scanned the playground. The rest of the children seemed to be enjoying themselves, whilst most parents chatted with each other around the many picnic benches; some families stayed together, but nothing out of the ordinary.

Me [1253]: Same… 7 more minutes left tho

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1254]: That’s rough buddy

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1254]: What time do you get off?

Izuku furrowed his eyebrows.

‘Have you finished your lunch?’ Fuyumi was suddenly at his side, a little out of breath. When he nodded, she scooped up his container. ‘No problem, I’ll pop these back in the staffroom while you chat up my brother.’

‘I am not-’ He faltered when she quickly sped away out of earshot, then grumbled as he turned back to his phone. ‘I wish.’

Me [1255]: The school day finishes at 3 15 but I won’t be leaving till half past. Why?

He tapped the edge of his phone as he waited for a reply, periodically monitoring the students.

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1257]: Just wondering for when Fuyumi comes home

Izuku tried not to feel disappointed with the answer.

Me [1258]: Fair enough. Anyway, I gotta start rounding up the kids. Speak to you soon!

He quickly put his phone in his pocket and got to his feet.

Once everyone was organised and lunch was officially over, Izuku left the first graders with Fuyumi and jogged back over to the obstacle course, anticipating the fourth graders. In truth, he handled them relatively easily. They were especially boisterous, but the rowdiness didn't manifest into disobedience, and the parents watching from the sidelines cheered them on in good sport.

It wasn't until they left and grade five appeared that Izuku felt anxiety return. He tried not to let it show as he explained the rules to the students, who seemed particularly riled up, as teams All Might and Shoto were currently tying for first place.

'Ugh, I hope those annoying first graders don't ruin it for us!' One rolled his eyes, while his friend groaned with frustration.

'I bet they do! They're so useless!' Hiru hadn't provided him with names, but Izuku knew enough to suspect who the bullies were. 'Especially that mutant porcupine-'

'Have you got something you want to share with everyone?' Izuku interrupted, stern. When the rest of the grade turned to share at the duo, embarrassment flooded their cheeks and they shook their heads. Izuku tried not to pay attention to the way some parents turned to whisper to one another and even point at him. 'Well then, I hope you were discussing the rules, because it’s time to split into teams.'

His smile returned as he continued on with the event. However, his eyes did occasionally scan certain individuals for longer than he usually would.

'Is that him?' He'd hear some of the adults whisper. 'The Quirkless one?'

He'd heard similar questions and hushed comments throughout the day—not all malicious, mainly curious—but right now, Izuku was struggling to ignore them. Maybe it was because there were parents among them who were overtly and dangerously quirkist. Realistically, he knew that he was safe and that he was doing his job to the best of his ability, but he still felt like he was under the spotlight; if he fucked anything up in front of them, then he was setting a bad example for his fellow HQ community.

Luckily, whispers aside, the remaining forty five minutes passed without any incidents, and Izuku exhaled with relief once he was left to pack everything away while the students and parents made their way to the athletics track. It was only a brief interlude—it was easier putting everything away compared to setting it all up this morning—but he welcomed it all the same. It gave him a chance to briefly recharge and gather his bearings.

Once everything was sorted, he—along with a few other teachers who had also been on clean-up duty—jogged over to join the rest of the school. It was loud, many voices cheering and whooping. From the look and sound of it, the third graders were competing, which meant that there were only two more races left.

He hadn't missed the final then.

Izuku spotted the first graders sitting together with Fuyumi, and smiled as he strode over

'How's it going?' He nudged her gently and joined her on the grass, leaning back on his ankles. He tried not to alert the students of his presence so they could enjoy the race. 'Miss anything?'

'Your initial predictions were right, as usual.' She crossed her arms and nodded towards the blackboard by the finish line. 'If team Lemillion win, which looks like it's about to happen, then no matter how team Dynamight do in the grade two race, they still won't be higher than third. That puts our kids competing for the overall first place in the final round.'

'Seriously?' His eyes widened. 'I never expected it to go that smoothly, especially considering I don't know the other grades as well as ours.'

'Yeah, but I distinctly remember walking into your classroom after school to snap you out of your three hour strategizing session because housekeeping was about to kick you out.' Fuyumi shrugged. 'Once you get fixated on something, that's it, so I was pretty confident with what you'd come up with... even if it requires me having to console my poor students after their inevitable defeat.'

'Look, it's not my fault the fastest first grader is in my class.' Izuku grinned when Fuyumi mock sneered at him. 'I just hope it's worth it.'

His friend hummed, but didn't comment further, as the race came to an end. As expected, team Lemillion won—which meant both teams were out of the running for first—but that didn't prevent the second graders from giving it their absolute all in their race for third place. While that was going on though, Izuku tapped his class's four candidates on the shoulder.

'Hey, sensei!' Hana and Tomoyo both exclaimed, while Hiru waved.

'Are you here to escort us to the start line?' Touta asked, straight to the point.

'You bet I am!' He smiled, gesturing for them to get up. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Fuyumi do the same with her students. 'Are you ready?'

'Yes!' They jumped up.

'Do your best!' Haku called out, prompting the rest of the class to shout their good luck.

'I believe in you!' Nozomi pumped her fist. 'Show them what you're made of, Hiru!'

'Gotta go fast!' The aforementioned giggled, as they made their way around the course.

Instead of the typical 400m relay, they had painted a track half the size; therefore, to run a full lap, each student participating would run 50m. It was the ideal size, as it meant everyone had enough space to spectate, including the parents.

By the time they made it to the starting line, the penultimate race concluded, as teams Dynamight and Lemillion shouted accordingly—the cheers outweighing the groans of the losing team. Izuku wasn't quite sure who had won, until he heard Tomoyo inform Touta that Lemiilion had made a last minute comeback and had beat Dynamight by one point.

'Alright, everyone!' The Head announced through a loudspeaker; Izuku winced at the volume. 'Has everyone enjoyed today?' He paused as the field filled with whoops and excited "yeah"s, before continuing. 'It's time for our final race of the day and the battle for first place! Show some support for the first graders!'

Amongst the noise, the students got into position and the first runners were given their baton.

'I was telling the others about how you can start running before your partner gets to you.' Touta informed Izuku. 'That way, there's no stopping, which could slow the race down, but I also told them not to start running too early. Don't worry, we practised yesterday during playtime!'

'Is that so?' Izuku nodded in understanding. 'How did that go?'

'Very well! I'm confident we'll win!' Touta nodded firmly, before getting on the ground into the proper position, unlike the other student, who was just standing normally and side-eyeing him.

Izuku quickly stepped to the side and gave a thumbs up. Anticipation set in as the Head counted them down, and suddenly they were running. Touta—ever idolising Ingenium—had an intense look of concentration as he hand chopped with each stride; somehow not losing the baton.

True to his word, Tomoyo started running as he came closer—not too fast and with her arm stuck out ready—and the transition was fairly smooth. Despite Touta's start, the race was still neck and neck; the class B girl running against Tomoyo was very fast—Izuku could feel Fuyumi’s smirk from here—so they quickly took the lead. His heart almost burst as Tomoyo’s face went red in her attempt to frantically catch up, but it was no use.

It wasn’t over yet though. Once the baton went to Hana, they were able to make back some of the gap. By this point, everyone was cheering and shouting—Izuku included, whilst trying not to let the desperation show in his voice—hoping for victory. Hana did well to pick up their pace, and once Hiru started running, nothing could stop him; he easily overtook his opponent and sprinted towards the finish line. His quills shook where his sports shirt had been modified, his nose bounced with each step, but his face was determined, focusing only on one goal.

Izuku looked around him, searching everyone else’s expressions. Most were watching with amazement, others with delight, whilst those on team Shoto were clutching their heads in anguish. When his eyes scanned over the fifth graders from earlier, he was glad to see them staring at Hiru with wide eyes; their mouths agape with shock. That was progress, at least, and when Hiru crossed the finish line—an easy victory—they punched their fists in the air and cheered with everyone else.

Izuku let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding and turned back to Hiru—who was being crowded by the rest of class A—and joined them in their congratulations, making sure to commend the other runners as well. The background noise all mingled into one, so once he'd said his piece, Izuku made his way back to Fuyumi, a smile on his face…

Until he passed the adults.

'To let a mutant participate in this event is ridiculous.' He overheard one of the parents complain. 'They clearly have an unfair advantage.'

‘Exactly! That’s what I’ve been saying for the past three years!’ Another chimed in. 'They should have their own category or something, especially when the normal kids aren't allowed to use their quirks.'

Izuku's jaw tightened and he turned.

'Excuse my intrusion.' His heart pounded against his chest. What was he doing? 'But I hardly think a children's sports day warrants any extra categories based purely on physical attributes—we don’t split the beanbag toss up depending on height, after all. Plus, one member of class B's relay team also had a heteromorph quirk, so I don't think there was any "unfair" advantage.'

'Of course you would think that.' The first parent rolled her eyes. 'Everyone has an advantage over someone quirkless, so it's all the same to you.'

Wow, no hesitation there.

That stung, but Izuku wasn't about to submit.

'I have a joint-honours degree in both teaching and quirk studies, with a postgraduate specialisation in the development of quirks.' He replied, easily. 'So I don't think you can just write me off as not knowing what I'm talking about simply because I'm quirkless, which is a prejudiced argument if I've ever heard one.'

'Well if you're so smart, then you should know about how these genetic mutations are illnesses-'

'Illnesses?' He couldn't help but scoff. 'Do you believe everything Speak Out tell you? Do you know the studies they cite are super dodgy and often anecdotal?'

'That's because the scientists doing peer reviews are politically motivated.'

'No, it's because the studies' methods are shi- rubbish, and the word "illness" is thrown around too liberally.' Izuku remained steadfast. Luckily, they hadn't attracted a crowd yet, but he could tell some of the other parents were looking at them. 'Anyone with critical thinking knows that.'

'Are you saying I have no critical thinking?'

'Well, if the shoe f-'

'Midoriya-sensei.' Fuyumi suddenly appeared at his side, her smile placating. 'Why don't you let me take over? Kimura-san and Shimizu-san’s children are in my class. I'll meet you in the staffroom.'

She looked at him deliberately, but Izuku didn't retreat straight away. He held her gaze for a few seconds first, clearly not happy about the situation.

'Alright.'

Casting the parents one final glance, he took his leave. As he made his way through the crowd though, he clenched his fists tightly and bit the inside of his cheek to prevent any angry muttering.

It's always one step forward, two fucking steps back.

***

'So, you told me to ask again in eight hours.' Fuyumi said as they walked out of the school building. 'How're you doing?'

Izuku sighed, kicking a small stone.

'At least the kids are acting in a friendly way.' He tried to focus on the positives. 'Those fifth graders even called Hiru cool.'

'Yes… But that's not what's on your mind.' Fuyumi stated pointedly. 'It's that conversation with the parents that would’ve escalated if I hadn’t intervened.'

Izuku chuckled humorlessly, still staring at the ground.

'You got me.' He conceded, spreading his palms in surrender. 'It was just so frustrating.'

'I know.' Fuyumi waved at the school caretaker over by the bins, prompting Izuku to also wave politely. 'I wasn't able to talk much sense into them after you left, I'll be honest, but I pointed them to the information session we'll be hosting—they said they'll be there.'

'Yay.'

'You stop that now.' She swatted him without any real malice. 'You were the one who…'

Izuku turned to look at her when she trailed off, only to find her staring at the school gate, mouth agape. Confused, he followed her gaze and baulked when he saw red and white hair.

'Shoto-kun?'

The aforementioned was leant against the wall, still in his hero costume, and scrolling through his phone. When he noticed them approaching, however, he pocketed the device and nodded in greeting.

'What a lovely surprise.' Fuyumi sounded almost amused. 'What brings you to this side of the world?'

'Midoriya told me what time you'd both be finishing, so I thought I'd walk home with you.' Shoto answered easily, like this was perfectly normal behaviour. 'I figured if he was going to scream at me, may as well do it in front of an audience.'

'Scream?' Izuku took a moment to process what he meant. 'Ooooh, the texts. I said I'd scream at him next time I saw him because he used his fire… Good screaming.'

'I was beginning to worry.' Fuyumi snorted. 'Good idea. Izuku could definitely do to let off some steam with a distraction.'

Shoto's expression immediately shifted into concern.

'That bad?'

Izuku sighed.

'I'll tell you about it later, but for now…' He paused for dramatic effect. 'Tell me everything about your fire!'

By the time they parted ways—the Todorokis turning left at the crossroads and Izuku going straight on—he couldn't deny he was definitely in a better mood than he had been an hour ago.

[robloxslenderman]

the entire stop it slender roblox fandom page

no, im not sorry

Stop it, Slender!

Stop it, Slender!

Creator

Kinnis97

Month created

July 2010

Visits

Around 175,950,000

Genre

Horror

Page last updated on November 25, 2023

Stop it, Slender! is a survival horror tag game created by Kinnis97. It is based on Garry's Mod's game mode "Stop it, Slender!" which was based on the popular game Slender: The Eight Pages. It has been seen on the front page multiple times in the past due to the popularity of Slender: The Eight Pages.

Contents

1Objective

2Gameplay and Game modes.

2.1Normal game-mode.

2.2Power Supply game mode.

3Playable Roles

3.1Slender

3.2Proxy

3.3Citizen

4Comparisons

5Maps

6Tips

6.1Citizen

6.2Slender

6.3Proxy

7Perks & Codes

7.1Game passes

7.2Codes

8History

9Interesting Facts

10Gallery

10.1Videos

Objective

The objective of the game has always been the same: find the three generators and activate them, collect all the eight pages and avoid Slender, who is, in this game, an actual player, and not an NPC.

Gameplay and Game modes.

Normal game-mode.

The game starts when a map with the most votes (or is automatically) is chosen. Then, a random player is chosen to be Slender. A proxy is also sometimes rarely chosen. Other players will be selected to play as citizens, the role for players that need to find eight pages. When a player has entered the round at the start of the game, they are unable to move as instructions are shown up on the screen. After approximately 15 seconds, the message is removed and the player can move - the hunt begins. Citizens must activate three generators in order to unlock certain areas; this is required to obtain all of the pages. If Slender is close, it is lethal to look at him; it will cause a penalty in your health. The rate at which you lose health depends on how many pages had been collected so far. Even if you are looking at the back of Slender, you will still take damage. You will also lose health when a proxy touches you. Spectators that are new to the server can join mid-game. If the citizens find all 8 pages, Slender loses. If all citizens are killed before all eight pages are found, Slender wins.

Power Supply game mode.

The Power Supply game mode was different from the normal game mode, as it did not require citizens to collect any pages. Instead, they needed to activate all generators as soon as possible. Once they have been activated, the power supply would have started to fill. As the power supply increased, the damage that Slender does increase as well, so one would be cautious of dying. Slender could also turn generators off slowing down the process of the power supply increasing, although the ability has a long cooldown. Once the power supply was fully restored, the citizens would win. If all the citizens were to get wiped out, Slender would win. This game mode was completely removed from the game in an update in November 2019, but someday before October 13th 2021, it was added back.

Proxy Infection game mode.

The Proxy Infection game mode was added a later than the Power Supply game mode. This game mode was nearly the same as the Normal game mode except that every fallen citizen would have turned into a Proxy. Unlike the Normal game mode and Power Supply game mode, it was a guarantee that a user would be chosen to be a Proxy. The game mode had a lot of bugs around its beginning but today most of them are fixed. The rest is basically the same as Normal game mode.

Classic game mode.

The Classic game mode was basically the exact same as the Normal game mode, the only difference being that the generators were the old ones used before March 14, 2022. This game mode was also added to give throwbacks to the older players of the game.

Playable Roles

Slender

As Slender, your role is to prevent the Citizens from activating the generators and collecting the pages. You have seven minutes to do so. Slender can use:

Invisibility (Q to activate/deactivate, E to deactivate it quietly).

The ability to grab citizens and deal damage. G is the keybind corresponding to this ability. It will only work on citizens who maintain direct eyesight with Slender, and vice versa while in grab mode.

Slender can move a lot faster than citizens while invisible.

The ability to stun players when citizens look at Slender. (perk only).

The ability to see in the dark.

The ability to cause hallucinations and damage citizens (only when citizens look at him).

Slender starts at a location isolated from Citizens. Slender can only deal damage to the citizens while visible, but in that case, they are way slower than the speed of a normal citizen. When he goes invisible, however, his speed increases. When Slender goes visible, a suspense sound effect is played for a moment, followed by whispering, alerting the citizens that Slender is near them.

From time to time, Slender will have an option to grab the citizen they are in contact with, thus draining their health in the process. The damage Slender deals with a citizen will increase with the number of Pages collected.

If Slender leaves the game while a round is in process, they will lose 5 pages, All players will be notified, and then 1 player (including spectators) will become Slender. (This was added in November 2019)

Proxy

The role of a Proxy is to assist Slender in preventing the Citizens from collecting his Pages. They are rarely chosen in games, but each spectator has an option to get into the game in progress as the Proxy for 8 pages. Following are the advantages of each Proxy:

Faster speed.

Proxys have 3 abilities. Hallucinations, Proxys can play a loud screeching noise at the citizen and their facial appearance flashes repeatedly for a while disrupting the citizens which can also be done if a Proxy touches a citizen. False Slender, Proxys can spawn a Slender in front of a citizen but while it may look like they are taking damage, they are simply looking at a fake Slender which doesn't do damage. Closing Flashlight, Proxys can turn off the citizen's around them flashlights and make them unable to open their flashlight for a few seconds.

The ability to see in the dark.

The help of the Proxies to Slender is that they can cause hallucinations, draining Citizens' HP. However, they are vulnerable to flashlights; when they are in a radius of a Citizen's flashlight, they will slowly fade away and become visible after 30 seconds.

Citizen

Citizens are the protagonists of the game and Slender's enemy. Their role is to activate all three generators and collect all eight pages without being caught by Slender in process.

They are generally defenseless and the only kind of equipment they possess is a flashlight with an unlimited battery source. According to their HUD (Heads Up Display), they also wield a camera with a chronometer on the upper left and a battery percentage on the lower left, acting as a health meter. Citizens all start at one location at the map, noticeably farther away from Slender and Proxies. They have a stamina bar for faster running which, once empty, takes some time to refill.

If a citizen happens to look at Slender, their screen will be attacked with static and suspenseful noise, and instructions "LOOK AWAY" will appear on the screen. As a result, some of their health is drained. The drainage depends on the number of collected pages, as it increases with it. This can help Slender catch players off-guard and kill them easier. If a Proxy touches a Citizen, their screen will be attacked by static and loud screeching noises as Proxy's facial expression flashes. However, they can survive Proxy's attack by flashing their light at it, causing it to fade away.

If a Citizen is killed by Proxy/Slender, they can choose to get back into the round as a Proxy for 8 total pages.

Comparisons

ComparisonCitizenProxySlenderAppearanceMatches avatar appearance.Pale skin, visible bloody wounds, sinister grin.Pale skin, bald and faceless head, unnatural height, black tuxedo. The player can customize his looks via loot boxes.HeightAverage Roblox Height.Average Roblox Height.About one and a half Average Roblox Height.SpeedAverage Roblox Speed (16). Medium-fast when sprinting.Fast. Slower than Slender when invisible and a little bit faster than Citizens.Very slow when visible. Fast when invisible.GoalCollect all pages and activate all generators.Assist Slender.Kill all Citizens.AbilitiesNone. Additional abilities in the shop.Disorient Citizens, make them hallucinate a false Slenderman and force them to turn off flashlights.Hurt Citizens if they look at you/grab them when near you (about 2 HP every 1 second). Additional abilities in shop.WeaknessesVulnerability.Flashlights.None.DarkCannot see in the dark, relying on their flashlights. They can see in the dark with the Night Vision Perk for a period of timeCan see in the dark.Can see in the dark.Ambient ColorNormal.Greenish.Reddish hue.InvisibilityNever.When faded out.By pressing Q when visible.

Maps

ImageMapCreator(s)DescriptionAbandoned MallOfficialAndrewThis map is set in a small mall with only 1 possible page placement. There are 3 pages in the unlocked areas. This map is easy to win as a citizen or slender. Slender starts in one of the generator rooms on the second floor of the mall.

A new update occurred some time later and added a new parking lot which has 1 generator. Making the map rather medium-sized. Another update revamped both the interior and exterior areas of the map completely, giving a similar layout but a new and improved look.Deserted SchoolOfficialAndrewThis map is set in a school. It is large with 2 possible page placements. There are 5 or 6 pages in the unlocked areas. The generators are in the Cafeteria, the Principal's Office, and at the Fitness Corner. Slender either starts in the Computer Room or at the Fitness Corner.

An update sometime later expanded the grey brick walled area, making it into a restroom.WillowbrookOfficialAndrewThis map is set in a neighborhood. There is one generator in a place enclosed with a two-brick layer, and there is almost always a page on the back of the board hear there. There is notably also a place in the forest that always contains at least one page. However, Slender spawns there.Cargo HoldrobodiggaThis map is set in an area full of large boxes and small vehicles. It is large with 2 possible page placements. There are 5 pages in the unlocked areas in both page placements. Slender starts in a far corner of the Cargo Hold.Madhouse LabZacAttackkThis map is set in a lab. It is large with 2 possible page placements. There are 6 pages in the unlocked areas in both page placements. There are 2 generators in the upper floor and 1 on the lower floor. Slender starts on the upper floor if one of the pages is on the projector screen and on the lower floor if one of the pages is on the pillar on the second floor next to a generator.AsylumKinnis97This is a very large map. It is set in an asylum with 2-story buildings A, B, and C. This map is quite hard because of many rooms in each building with 3 possible page placements. The Citizens starts in the main office on the first floor of Building A, where 2 generators are in one of the rooms, building C has the 3rd generator. Activating all of the generators grant the citizens access to Building B, which was locked at the start of the round.TarnishNowDoTheHarlemShakeThis map is set in a place that seems like a construction place, yet it is not. With a tower that you can hide in toward the middle or the end of a match. Just not in the beginning because Slender either starts beside the Tower or beside one of the abandoned cargo containers in the middle of the map. And I wouldn't take the chance of him catching you at the tower. But since there are so many crates, you a least have a good hiding place.FactoryfidlerThis map is set in a factory. It is large with 2 possible page placements. There are 6 pages in the unlocked areas in both page placements. Slender either starts beside the Factory or beside the generator that is not easy to reach.ComplexZeekerssWith so many rooms and so little time, the pages are almost impossible to find. And with so many rooms, this almost seems like Slender's backrooms. As the name suggests, the map is complex with its various similar rooms and hallways. The generators are each in a type of triangle with each other, but most people don't notice this because of how alarmingly large this map is. There's not much to say about this map.Ocean LinerScaramangarA map of considerable size, with an eerie feeling, as if your walking through the underworld. Some of the final pages can be tricky to find, as there are many corridors with many messes of tiny rooms to search. Citizens are advised to unite when searching these areas, as it is easy and quick for slender to kill you if you are on your own. If there are more of you, the area can be searched much faster.Ancient RuinsScaramangarA rather large map set in some ancient ruins. Slender spawns in the ruins, while citizens spawn outside the ruins. Citizens are advised to enter the ruins as soon as possible after spawning, as slender can quickly leave the ruins and kill many citizens that wait outside.HotelScaramangarA very small and simple map set in a hotel. But just because it's simple, doesn't mean it isn't scary. With so many rooms and a labyrinth, Slender can catch you off guard. It is sometimes hard to navigate yourself because it is so packed. Slender will spawn on the second floor of the hotel, while citizens spawn in the parking lot. If you go through the main entrance to the garden, keep on going straight until you get to the generator. The other two are on the second floor of the hotel and on the outside of the building.

Tips

Citizen

When playing as a citizen, don't stick together with other citizens because then you are more easy prey for a proxy or for slender to kill you.

It's best to search for harder to find pages when the game first starts.

Perks can help a lot, especially for new players.

Always activate the generators first to allow you to access the whole map.

If possible, wear headphones or earplugs, as it makes the gameplay more enjoyable and allows you to hear if slender is near, as when he goes visible he makes noises.

If you do not have headphones or earplugs, turn up your volume to an appropriate level to hear slender.

Always listen and be cautious.

If you are easily startled by loud noises, you can mute the game and (optional) play happy music to light up the mood. However, with this, you are easier to be killed by Slender. You can also use the "Rainbow Flashlight" game pass to improve the gameplay experience.

if you have the "Regenerating Flashlight" perk, Turn it off most of the time if all the generators are activated, since this will regenerate your health, plus you can see due to the light provided. This tip is very useful in the Ancient Ruins map.

When you see a Proxy, Look at it with your flashlight on.

You cannot hide anywhere, even if you have your flashlight off, Slender is able to see where everyone is.

Try to memorize the layout of maps, because then you will know where the generators are, and where pages often spawn,

If the proxy is near you, start sprinting! You will lose health if the proxy touches you. If you were sprinting and you noticed a page, quickly collect it before sprinting again.

Slender

Always go to the people near the pages/generators first, leave the citizens that are not near the pages/generators until last.

Try to know the rough areas where pages spawn, in order to protect them.

Defend the generators. Without access to the whole map, the citizens cannot win.

Go after citizens with the most pages. They are most likely an expert at the map/game and are well familiar with the page locations.

If a player is near a page, avoid them from collecting it.

Don't follow the proxy, it can kill citizens on it's own.

If there's a proxy to assist you, then heavily damage most players to 20%-30% of their battery, and let the proxy finish them off, as this technique will save time.

In Power Supply game mode, prevent the generators from being activated by grabbing citizens or frequently turn off generators.

Proxy

Don't follow slender. Find your own targets and hunt them.

Attack the citizens from the back, not the front, attacking from the front will cause you to fade away slowly.

Flashlights are your weaknesses. Avoid them being pointed at you.

Walk in the darkness to not be spotted and chased.

Finish the citizens that have low health left.

Perks & Codes

Perks are special abilities only available through purchasing them with pages or Robux. Using pages is only for a single round, however; purchasing ability with Robux will grant it for a lifetime, but the perk has to be activated via the Shop.

There are 15 perks that can be bought with Robux. These are:

Game passes

x10 Proxy Chance (500 R$): The user will have a permanent 10x chance to be a Proxy.

3x Slender Chance (300 R$): The user's chance to be Slender will increase by 3x.

150% Battery Life (150 R$ , 180 Pages): The user (as a citizen) will have 50% extra health.

Industrial Flashlight (75 R$ , 60 pages): The user's flashlight is 1.5x more powerful than normal.

SUPER RAINBOW FLASHLIGHT (500 R$): The user can press V as a citizen while their flashlight is on. The flashlight will become rainbow instead of the regular white, and can play a song from the Roblox Library, that can be selected from the Settings menu.

Auxiliary Battery (100 R$ , 90 Pages): The user can regenerate 50% of their health if they're damaged enough.

Slender's Knowledge (25 R$ , 24 PAGE): The user as Slender can see citizen names on their radar, plus the amount of pages they have collected.

Slender's Hearing [Not a perk anymore]): The user is able to see and say things inside the chat while playing as Slender.

Regenerating Flashlight (150 R$ , 90 Pages): When the user's flashlight is off, they will regenerate about 1% of their health per second.

Extra Stamina (75 R$ , 60 Pages): The user's sprint meter has 1.5x more stamina, and they recover stamina faster.

Triple Vote (100 R$): During map voting, the user's vote counts as 3 instead of the usual 1.

Sixth Sense (75 R$ , 90 Pages): When Slender is near, the user will hear a strange noise followed by the text "He's near..". The text will become more visible and the sound becomes more audible as the user gets closer to Slender.

Electric Touch (150 R$ , 90 Pages ): The user activate generators TWICE as fast!

Energy Synthesis (75 R$ , 48 Pages)​​​​​​: The user regains a small amount of energy upon collecting a page.

Terror Aura (100 R$ , 60 Pages): If the user is Slender and a citizen sees them, the citizen will be stunned for a brief moment.

Night Vision (60 Pages): Allows the user to see in the dark for a moment and recharges after a minute.

Generator Radar (6 Pages): Allows the user to see where the generators are for only one round.

Page Radar (11 Pages): Once all generators are activated, The user can see where all the pages are for only one round.

Stronger Grab (60 Pages): This makes the user's grab stronger as slender.

Bonus Proxy Health (50 Pages): It will be harder for citizens to fade the user away from proxy.

Proxy Oblivious (25 Pages): The proxy is not able to see or effect the user, but the user can't fade the proxy away.

Revival (150 R$ , 75 Pages): The user can revive one player per round.

Stealth (50 Pages): The user doesn't appear on Slender's Radar until all generators are activated.

Double Sided Pages (300 R$): Doubles the user's collected pages at the end of a round.

Codes

All of these codes give an outfit!

doggu

edups

Experiment97

huffnpuff

Mystik

nordie

onions

pinstriped

plaguedoctor

sparklesparkle

stopitspooky

terminate

theblob

thenight

vulpine

Wrinkles

hufflepuff

spookplush

History

During early Beta, the only map used was The Facility by loleris.

During early Beta, there was a sprint button for civilians and Slender, although slender could only use it once and it was twice as fast as the buttons the civilians used. The sprint button has been brought back for Civilians to increase their chances of winning a round.

The only maps removed were the Warehouse (an exact copy of the Hide and Seek Map) and the Facility (Kinnis never intended to use this map for long).

Interesting Facts

Rarely, you can respawn as a proxy after being killed as a citizen from slender, although this costs 10 pages. It is free in VIP servers.

Looking at slender through windows or transparent parts does not hurt you. This was first discovered on the Hotel map. This is possibly because any part opaque or not blocks your view or is in the way from seeing Slender.

There is a hat known as the Slender Fedora, of which its description reads "Stop it, slender!" This is most likely a reference to the game.

To promote the release of Stop it, Slender!, KinnisC gave out Stop it, Slender! themed pins to users maplestick, PeteyK473, Chris12902, AutumnRxyne, Qwainy, CarbonAPI, devJacob, Captain_testaccount, Twitter users shoseyy, officialjsuma, namerbx, and roblox246809753.

The Map Madhouse Lab is also featured in the 2014 horror game Glitch

[watchmegetobsessed]

TO LOVE AND BE LOVED - Part Two (Harry Styles)

a/n: you guys thank you so much for all the love you’ve showed part one!! 🥺 im so happy you like the story! i wanted to post part two a little later, in the weekend but i got so happy for all the reactions that i decided to move it earlier so here it is! i’ll try to update soon, the longest it will take is one week probably. im working on my thesis and have a lot of school work so please be patient with me! feedback is very much welcomed, as always, your reactions and comments mean so much to me!!

pairing: CEO!Dad!Harry X Reader

warning: mentions of death, cheating and divorce

word count: 10.4k

SERIES MASTERPOST masterlist

Pulling Izzy out of daycare dramatically lessened the amount of time she could spend with her friends, so the situation needs extra attention on her socializing. You’ve been trying to take her to the park as much as possible so she could meet with kids her age and Harry has been arranging a lot of playdates for her with her friends from daycare.

When you come back from meeting your brother for lunch on a Sunday, you are greeted with not two, but eight little feet running around the living room, many of Izzy’s toys have been brought downstairs and the coffee table is filled with fruits, snacks and drinks for the kids. You know the two little guests, it’s Yara and Zac, the three of them were like a little gang back when Izzy was attending daycare. Yara’s moms and Zac’s mom are sitting on the terrace, letting the kids roam around freely, Harry is in the kitchen preparing some sandwiches for the guests when you arrive back.

“Hi, do you need help with anything?” you ask, catching his attention.

“Oh, hi! No I’m fine, thank you. How was lunch with your brother?”

“Great,” you smile at him before leaving him to do whatever he has to do.

“Miss Y/N!” Yara greets you, waving in your way while munching on an apple slice.

“Hello Yara, Zac,” you smile at them before walking out to the terrace to greet the parents. “Hi! Ava, Saige, it’s nice to see you again. And Linda, hello!”

“Y/N, hi! Harry told us you might return soon, so good to see you!” Ava greets you as you join them at the table. They’ve been the nicest parents while you were working at the daycare, though you weren’t the only victim of the closed-minded cowards that got you fired. Ava and Saige have faced quite a lot of backlash for basically daring to be a same-sex couple out in the open. You’ve heard many complaints from other parents about how they don’t want them to pick up their daughter together. Apparently, it’s confusing for the kids to see two women to be the mothers of the same child. Ridiculous.

“I was out having lunch with my brother. How have you been?”

“Things are the same, you know,” Saige shrugs with a scowl. “But your firing has got us thinking about pulling Yara out as well.”

“Oh!”

“Yeah, it’s starting to get really ridiculous. I mean it’s one thing that we get weird looks, but firing you was kind of the last straw,” Ava nods.

“And how have you been here, Y/N? How is working for Harry?” Linda asks.

“Oh, it’s amazing, really. I love taking care of Izzy, she is so easy to handle and I love seeing her learn and grow. And Harry is a great boss, I got really lucky.”

“Lucky indeed!” Ava smirks, making them all laugh as you feel yourself blushing. “Even I sometimes dream about the man,” she adds, keeping her tone down.

“How do you keep your cool?” Linda sighs. “If I had to live with this man, I would go nuts.”

“Well, Izzy keeps me pretty busy, and he is my boss, so…”

“It’s not like HR would be up your ass if you got involved,” Saige shrugs, taking a sip from her iced tea.

You don’t get to react, the kids run out, taking over the playground, Harry arriving right behind them with a plate filled with sandwiches for the guests.

“Ladies, sorry for the wait,” he smiles, placing the food to the table as he joins your little circle.

“Oh Harry, thank you so much!” Ava sighs, grabbing one already. “We were just talking to Y/N about how big of an upgrade it is for her to work here.”

“Is it?” he asks, slightly surprised as he glances over at you.

“I mean, the paycheck is better and it’s clearly a better environment,” you chuckle shrugging.

“I just don’t know why Claire lets those assholes control the place. She is the boss there, she should stand up against them,” Linda scowls.

“She is just trying to avoid confrontation.”

“No, she is afraid they would stop paying the daycare the money, so she is an ass-kisser,” Saige scoffs, making you laugh.

“Well, at least I have Y/N now to take good care of Izzy,” Harry smiles, his eyes meeting yours and you swear your heart skips a beat when he says that he has you.

“Lucky bastard!” Ava throws her hands into the air, making everyone laugh.

Enjoying the company, you stay outside instead of locking yourself up in your room. It’s nice to see the moms occasionally pick on Harry, they surely like to joke about him being a hot single dad, but he usually just blushes and smiles at the compliments. Linda and Zac leave first, then Ava, Saige and Yara head home as well when it’s nearing five in the afternoon. Though Harry tells you to just leave the cleanup for him, you insist on helping.

“Now I feel bad you are working on your day off,” he huffs as you help him around in the kitchen.

“It’s not working,” you roll your eyes. “I live here too, of course I’m gonna help keeping it clean.”

“You know, if your brother ever wants to come over, feel free to invite him.”

“Might take your word, because he is very curious about the place,” you chuckle. Harry smiles as he starts washing the dishes.

“He is welcomed anytime.”

“Thank you.” Putting away the snacks that was left you start drying the dishes while he is washing them, working next to each other in silence. Unlike his usual attire, he is now wearing just a plain white t-shirt with light-washed jeans. “You’re quite the moms’ favorite,” you tease him, earning a soft chuckle from him.

“Saige and Ava like to pull my leg, but I know they mean well.”

“They are great people, I always liked them,” you smile glancing at him.

“I remember when I first met them at a parents’ meeting, they spotted how lost I was among all the moms and asked if I wanted to sit with them. Then Izzy became friends with Yara so we met quite a few times.”

“I find it a little funny we never met while I was working at the daycare. Izzy was in my group for almost a year and we just never ran into each other.”

Harry licks his lips before turning his gaze to you, finishing up the dishes and turning the water off.

“I saw you.” Your eyebrows shoot up. How did you not see him?

“Really?”

“Yeah, just a few times. Mostly it was Ruth who picked up Izzy these past few months. I had a huge project that ended just before you started here, so I didn’t have the chance to pick her up that much. But I saw you a few times. You were just always busy with the kids, I guess… you didn’t notice me,” he shrugs, holding his arms on his chest as he leans against the counter.

“It could get pretty intense sometimes even though it was just a daycare,” you chuckle, remembering to all the tantrums and fussy dramas that happened between the kids. Sometimes it felt more like a high school than a daycare, especially when friends were taken and lovestories happened through lunchtimes.

“Daddy! What are we having for dinner?” Izzy runs into the kitchen, tippy-tapping her hands on the counter that she can barely reach.

“Macaroni and cheese.”

“Yes! Maccy cheese!” Izzy cheers throwing her hands into the air. Harry smiles down at her, ruffling her hair and you can’t push down a smile at what she just called mac and cheese.

Harry starts prepping for dinner, he puts on some music that Izzy dances to and though you try to leave them be and enjoy their alone time, Izzy insists you stay and help as well.

“Izzy, let Y/N do what she wants, this is her day off,” Harry warns her, making her pout her lips at you. Not that you would have said no to her, but now you definitely can’t leave.

“It’s alright. I’m happy to help.”

Izzy sits on the counter in a safe distance from the stove, her duty is to watch the pasta cook while Harry takes care of the sauce and you set the table, knowing it won’t take long for the food to be ready.

“Daddy?” Izzy speaks up, tilting her head to the side.

“Yes, baby?”

“I love Maccy cheese. Does mom like it too?”

Harry’s eyes flicker over to you, as if he is embarrassed you caught a moment that shouldn’t have been revealed and you can tell he is still kind of torn how to handle the mentioning of his late wife. You keep a straight face, making yourself busy with cleaning off the counter top. You wouldn’t want to make him think he can’t talk about Maggie in your presence.

“Um, yeah. Mommy loves mac and cheese,” he nods, giving her knees a little squeeze before moving her off the counter to take care of the pasta.

Your eyes meet Harry’s gaze when you bring some water to the table and you can tell he is still thinking about the slip you just heard, but you give him a soft smile, trying your best to assure him nothing bad happened.

Izzy babbles through dinner about everything she did with Yara and Zac today, excited to see them as soon as possible and Harry promises her to arrange a meeting for them in the park sometime next week. You try to help with cleaning up, but Harry doesn’t let you, so pouring yourself a nice glass of wine you sit in the living room to watch some TV before going to bed. After dinner, Harry takes Izzy upstairs to give her a bath and once that’s done she is allowed to play some more in her room.

Harry joins you soon on the couch with a glass of wine as well, seemingly tired from all the socializing he did. Peeking at him while the evening news is playing on the screen, you notice that he is not even paying attention, deep in his thoughts he is pulling on his bottom lip like he always does whenever he is deep in focus. You have a guess what he is thinking about, but you want to give him the time and space to figure out if he is ready to share or not.

“I, uhh—I never really told you why it’s just Izzy and I,” he speaks up and you turn to him with patience, knowing the importance of him bringing it up. “My wife… Maggie, she… We got married about six years ago and then two years later we had Izzy. She was six months old when Maggie…”

He is struggling to find the words, or to just even think about it and you don’t want him to feel like he has to tell you about any of it.

“Harry, you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

“No, I want to. I always feel bad that I don’t talk about her, makes it look like I’m trying to forget about her, but that’s not at all the case, it’s just… hard to think about how long it’s been and I still feel like it was just… last week.”

Harry sniffles and you’re not sure if it’s because he is getting emotional to the point where he is going to start crying or it’s nothing significant, but you feel the urge to assure him about your support. Reaching over you put your hand to his arm, giving it a gentle squeeze. His eyes first fall to your hand and then to you, a sense of softness shining back from his green irises as he lets out a shaky breath.

“It was a car accident. She was driving home late night from her sister’s and a drunk driver ran the red light, crashed right into her car. They both were rushed into hospital, but Maggie’s lungs collapsed and she… they couldn’t help her. The guy had surgery and though he broke quite a few bones and had a serious concussion, he survived.”

You have to bite into your bottom lip, already feeling the tears welling in your eyes, but you quickly blink them away. You can only imagine what it’s like to be called and find out your wife was killed because of the dumb mistake of someone else. And to think that Izzy was still so small, Harry was left with a baby and the immense grief so suddenly, it must have been the toughest time he had to go through.

“I’m really sorry, Harry,” you quietly tell him, his eyes flickering up to meet yours and they are glistening from the tears. He just nods, blinking a few times before drinking up his wine.

Before anything else could be said, you hear Izzy running down the stairs, soon throwing herself to the couch, cuddling to Harry’s side.

“Hey baby, want to go to sleep already?” he asks, softly brushing through her hair with his fingers. Izzy nods, blinking sleepily. Harry scoops her into his arms standing up from the couch and he is reaching for his empty glass, but you take it before he could.

“I’ll wash it, don’t worry about it,” you smile at him.

“Thank you,” he breathes out, holding Izzy tight before the two of them disappear upstairs.

You don’t stay out too long yourself either, washing the glasses you let a single tear run down your cheek before quickly wiping it away and heading up to your room.

The past two years you’ve been taking gigs as a photographer more and more, going to weddings, birthday parties, baby showers or anniversaries to snap photos of others’ most precious moments. You are not a professional, nor do you treat yourself as one, but the more events you attended and the more work you put out, the more popular you started to get. Now you have about two bookings every month and you are able to ask for a quite impressive amount of money for a session that people are willing to pay for your pictures.

You’ve been putting off your gigs since you moved into the Styles mansion, wanting to focus on all the changes in your lives, but now that you’ve gotten quite used to your new life one month into it, you are getting back to your usual. This Saturday you’re doing a photoshoot of a soon-to-be-wedded pair who also booked you for their upcoming wedding in a few weeks. It’s kind of an engagement photoshoot since they couldn’t do one when they got engaged months ago, but they didn’t want to miss out on the chance to do one before they official tie the knot.

Harry and Izzy are planning to go to the zoo today, something she’s been begging to do for weeks now and Harry finally gave in, so all three of you are going to be quite busy today. The photoshoot takes place at this fancy, mid-century styled café the couple chose, so you decide to dress up yourself a little too. Putting on a maroon colored pencil skirt that hugs your hips and waist tight, you tuck into it a white silky blouse, making you appear like some kind of eyecandy assistant straight out of a Hollywood movie, especially with your low bun, which is less for the look but more for practicality, since you don’t like it when your hair gets caught in the straps of your camera.

Swinging your camera bag to one shoulder and your handbag to the other one, your camera hanging from your neck, you head downstairs, rushing a little because you’re short on time already. Izzy is sitting on one of the stools at the kitchen island while Harry is packing them some lunch and snacks for the day.

“Oh! Y/N, you look so pretty!” Izzy beams at you when you near the corner. She is dangling her legs playfully, her piggy tails curling adorably on each sides of her head. Harry’s head snaps up and his lips part upon spotting you.

“Thank you, Sunshine,” you smile at her, caressing her cheek, tickling her a little that makes her giggle.

“Where are you going?” she asks curiously.

“Izzy, don’t question her all the time, that’s not too nice,” Harry warns her, but you just shake your head.

“It’s alright. I have a photoshoot today. I have to take pictures of a couple that’s going to get married soon,” you explain to her and Harry’s ears perk up, eyeing the camera that’s hanging from your neck.

“I didn’t know you are a photographer,” Harry hums, closing the cooler.

“Well, I’m not a professional, but I’ve been doing photoshoots here and there.”

“That’s amazing!” he smiles warmly.

“Thanks. Well, I gotta go because I’m running a little late. Have fun at the zoo!” you smile, at them before walking out. You reach the front door but stop for a moment to read the text the bride has sent you letting you know they are running a little late as well. That’s when you hear the conversation between Harry and Izzy coming from the kitchen.

“She looked so pretty!” Izzy sighs. You expect Harry to just hum or ignore her words, but for your surprise, he answers her.

“Yeah, she really does.”

You blush like a teenage girl, feeling your heart fluttering in your chest as you smile, walking out of the house.

The father-daughter duo is still out when you get home later. You make yourself a tea and sit out to the terrace with your computer, starting to edit the photos right away so you can send then over to the couple as soon as possible. They turned out pretty good, you love the colorful vibe the café had and it went well with the pair’s outfits.

You get so into editing that you don’t even notice Harry and Izzy arriving home, just when the sliding door opens and Izzy runs up to you, holding a stuffed animal that appears to be an otter.

“Y/N, look what daddy got me!” she cheers holding up the toy.

“Oh my god, it’s really cute!” You pull her to sit on your lap as she hugs the toy, clearly happy to have a new addition to her already existing army. Harry walks out with a bottle of water and a glass. Joining the two of you at the table, he pours some water for Izzy and makes her drink it.

“We spent an entire hour watching the otters,” he chuckles, brushing Izzy’s hair out of her face as she chugs the water down.

“Can’t blame you, they are really cute,” you chuckle. Izzy puts the empty glass down and hops off your lap before announcing that she is gonna show her new toy around in the backyard before running away from you.

“Are those… the pictures from today?” Harry shyly asks, eyeing your laptop’s screen.

“Oh, yeah. Wanted to get a headstart on editing,” you nod turning it so he can have a better look. “Want to see what I got so far?”

“Of course!” he nods smiling.

You click through the photos you’ve already edited, there are about ten in total and you’re quite satisfied with how they turned out to be.

“Wow, they look… really good, Y/N.”

“Thank you,” you smile blushing a little.

“What events do you usually do?”

“Mostly weddings and engagement shoots, birthdays, these kinds of stuff.”

“It’s really amazing,” he nods smiling.

“I… Hope you won’t be mad but I’ve shot a few pictures of Izzy too these past weeks,” you admit, hoping he won’t get upset for you, doing it without his permission. “I didn’t use them anywhere, I wasn’t planning to, I just thought they were nice moments.”

“Oh, can I see them?”

“Of course!”

Opening up the folder you put her pictures into, you start clicking through the few photos you took of her. There’s one of her during her swimming lesson, laughing happily as she holds onto the edge of the pool, her wet locks sticking to her head. Then there’s one when the two of you were baking cupcakes and she got icing all over her face and tried to lick it off, her tongue sticking out on the picture. There are some of her just roaming around the backyard, exploring the bugs hiding in the grass, some of her napping with her favorite stuffed animals on the couch and then the last one was taken when she was jumping in her bed, you caught her up in the air, the widest smile on her face as she was laughing straight into the camera.

“Y/N, these are… wow. They are all so good, I love them!”

“Really?” Your smile grows wide, happy that he likes them.

“Yeah! Do you think… do you think you can send them to me?”

“Of course! I can get them printed for you, if you’d like. There’s a place where I go to get my photos printed, they make them look like they were taken on an analog, old school camera, I love that little extra touch on the pictures.”

“That would be fantastic,” he smiles, clearly in awe of your work.

You spend the rest of the afternoon editing while Harry and Izzy take over the kitchen as usual. When you’re on your way up to your room with your laptop after you decided to call it a day, you catch them in there, Izzy making Harry dance around with her while they are chopping the veggies. Harry is swaying his lips to the rhythm, humming to the song as Izzy is jumping and twirling around, singing from the top of her lungs. Despite the terrible loss of her mother, there’s no doubt Izzy is having the best possible childhood, getting all the love she deserves from her dad and you feel happy you are here to witness them grow together.

You did not see your parents’ divorce coming, probably because it’s been over six years since you’ve moved out and you only saw them every other week at best. You always tried to come around as often as possible, wanting to spend time with Trevor and of course, them as well, but you had to focus on building your own life. You had to worry about your work, your own living space and not much later you started dating Keith so you were pretty busy to say the least. You weren’t there when things started to go downhill, but Trevor was. He had to suffer through every fight and screaming match they had without any support and you’ve always felt guilty about it, but you couldn’t just move back home. However you’ve always tried to do everything you could to support him through these hard times. He knew he could call you anytime he had enough of the spiteful atmosphere at home and you were quick to come to his rescue.

You were mad at your parents, there’s no need to lie about it. But not because of getting a divorce, you knew better than to expect them to suffer in a marriage they weren’t happy in, but the way they handled has always been just… unacceptable. Especially because in the midst of their anger and hatred towards each other they started to forget that they still had a kid living home who had to listen to everything they threw at each other, things no son should ever hear about his parents, no matter if they were true or not.

Being a teenager in high school is stressful enough as it is, but having to deal with your parents’ nasty divorce is just something no teenager should have to go through. Trevor has been dealing with it for a while now and he is trying his best to just shut them out whenever they are going at it, but sometimes it’s not that easy. That’s when he seeks comfort at you.

It’s a Thursday evening when your parents decide to drive Trevor up the wall with their screaming and fighting again. You’re watching a movie with Izzy and Harry in the entertainment room, working on your laptop simultaneously, confirming some photoshoots for the upcoming weekends. Harry has let Izzy play with his hair while watching the movie, so now she is all over her daddy, decorating his hair with little hairclips and hair ties while the man is just sitting there without a complaint.

Your phone starts buzzing on the couch and Trevor’s photo is flashing on the screen. Putting the laptop aside, you grab your phone and walk out of the room not to disturb them with your call.

“Hey!” you greet him happily, but your stomach immediately drops when you hear him draw a shaky breath on the other end of the line. “Trev? What’s wrong?”

“Can I please spend the night at yours?” he pleads weakly.

“What happened, are you alright?” you perk up right away.

“It’s just… dad came over this afternoon and they went at it again and now they are doing it over the phone, mom is like really out of her mind right now. I have a math test tomorrow and I don’t think I can sleep here like this. She is still screaming at him over the phone.”

“I’m leaving right now, pack a bag, alright?”

“Thanks,” he breathes out and ends the call. Rushing back into the entertainment room Harry turns to you while Izzy is still busy with his hair.

“Uh, I know it’s really sudden and all, but my brother just called, would it be fine if he spent the night over here?” Even though Harry himself told you it’s fine to have people over, you still feel like you need to ask for his permission, especially if your guest is planning to stay the night.

“Is he alright? Of course he can come over.” Sitting straight up he asks Izzy to sit down a little which she gladly does, turning her attention towards the movie.

“It’s just, um, our parents are having another scream match. They are… They are in the middle of getting a divorce and they are not handling it right,” you let out a bitter chuckle.

“Oh, I’m sorry about that. Do you need me to come with you? You seem very upset, you sure you can drive?”

“No, it’s alright, but thanks. I’m fine. I’ll be back soon with him and thank you so much for letting him stay,” you breathe out. He just nods with a sympathetic smile before you turn around and leave.

Through the drive over to the house where you grew up your anger just grows with each turn you take. You love your parents to death, they raised you in a quite unusual and hard situation, they had to grow up with you when they had you so young, but they always made sure to give you everything you needed. And you know they have the same kind of love towards Trevor, but their hatred for each other is blinding them and they probably don’t even realize how much it affects him, but you are not letting them ruin everything because they fell out of love. Trevor deserves the same kind of supportive and loving environment to grow up in just like the one you had and there’s nothing that could change that.

Pulling up to the driveway you take a deep breath as you march up to the front porch and use your keys to let yourself in. The shouting hits your ears right away, it’s coming from the kitchen, but Trevor is the first one you spot on the top of the stairs. His hood is on and he has a backpack in his hands as he comes down the stairs with a pained and tired face.

“Hey! Left the car open, go get in there, I’ll be out in a minute,” you softly tell him as you give him a quick hug.

“Thanks,” he mumbles before walking out.

Following your mother’s voice to the kitchen you find her with a half empty bottle of wine, cussing your father out through the phone.

“Go and fuck that bitch you went out to have dinner with last weekend! Yes I know about that!” she spats and you wince at her words.

“Mom!” you call out, but she doesn’t even register your voice.

“Fuck you, Fred! Fuck you!” she continues, so you raise your voice a little more.

“Mom!” This time she finally hears it and turning around she looks at you with wide eyes.

“Y/N! What are you doing here? You didn’t say you were coming,” she adds, her voice soft and weak this time, the anger long gone from it.

“I’m here to pick Trevor up. Put dad on speaker, I want to have a word with you two,” you tell her firmly and she gulps hard, nodding as she sets the phone to the counter, putting your dad on speaker.

“Y/N? What’s going on?” you hear him question from the other end of the line.

“I could ask the same thing!” you snap back, fed up with the way they have been acting. They might have lost a good chunk of their youth because they were busy taking care of you after having at just nineteen, but that doesn’t give them the right to act like literal cavemen in front of your brother.

“Trevor called me all upset, begging me to come and get him. What is wrong with you two? You have been at each other’s throats all the damn time, it is not healthy not just for Trevor but to either of you!”

“Y/N, sweetie, there’s just a lot going on—“ your mother tries to explain, but you cut her off.

“I don’t fucking care! Whatever is going on between the two of you, Trevor should be first! No matter what! He needs you both, he needs the support and love, but he is only getting the screaming and fighting. This is not right!”

“It’s a hard situation, you have to be patient with us, Y/N,” your father sighs over the phone and you can’t hold your ironic laughter back.

“Patient? I’ve been patient with you these past about five months since you’ve been literally tearing each other to pieces. Do yourselves and everyone else a favor and just get it over with. Dad, pick up all your stuff and don’t come here for mom’s sake. Mom, don’t snoop around dad’s life, because it’s not your business anymore. Stop being ignorant and maybe start to think about the kid you still have living near you.”

Your words might have been harsh, but it needed to be said. You can tell by your mother’s shocked expression and from the way your dad is dead silent in the call that your message finally hit them in the head and you hope they are willing to get their shit together so Trevor doesn’t lose his mind.

“Trevor is staying with me tonight, we’ll see when he wants to come back, but you better think about what I just told you,” you warn them before walking out and leaving them to think about their actions finally.

Trevor stays silent on the road back to Harry’s and you don’t try to force him to talk, it’s clear he has had enough for today. Arriving back home you park your car next to Harry’s Range Rover and the two of you walk inside in silence.

It’s past Izzy’s bedtime so you’re not surprised to find only Harry in the kitchen when you walk into the house. Harry seems cautious, almost worried as he spots you and Trevor in the hallway.

“Trevor, this is my boss, Harry. Harry, this is my brother, Trevor,” you introduce them to each other quickly. They shake hands with a manly nod.

“Thanks for letting me stay here tonight,” Trevor clears his throat, feeling a little out of place.

“No worries. Feel free to use any of the guest bedrooms,” Harry smiles softly.

“Oh, we’ll be fine sleeping in my room,” you assure him but Harry shakes his head at your words.

“We have plenty of space. Please, use them!”

“Thank you,” Trevor mumbles and you shoot Harry a thankful look before walking your brother upstairs.

You opt for the room next to yours, Help Trevor get comfortable, making sure he has everything he needs for the night.

“Did you get into a fight with mom and dad?” he asks, when you are sitting on the edge of his bed, about to leave him alone.

“I just told them to get their shit together,” you chuckle, giving his leg a squeeze under the covers. He cracks a smile at you, but it’s not as genuine as it should be. “I’ll drive you to school in the morning. My room is right next to this one, come over if you need anything, alright?”

“Thanks,” he mumbles, pulling the covers up to his chin.

“Good night, Trev,”you tell him switching the lights off and walking towards the door.

“Good night, Y/N,” he calls after you before you close the door, letting out a long breath.

As you make your way down to the kitchen you see that Harry is still there, his eyes snap up to you, filled with concern and worry.

“Everything alright?” he asks as you make yourself a tea.

“Yeah, he was just fed up with the constant screaming. I can’t blame him, my mother didn’t even realize I was there until I raised my voice at her.”

“I’m sorry about that. Must be hard dealing with high school and a nasty divorce.”

“It is,” you sigh. “But thank you for letting him stay, really.” “I meant it when I said it’s just as much your home as it is ours. He can come over anytime, don’t worry about that,” he shrugs.

“Thank you. I’ll drive him to school in the morning, but I’ll be back by the time you leave, is that alright?”

“Of course,” he smiles warmly. “You two look a lot alike.”

“We get that a lot,” you chuckle. “It’s the eyes and nose shape, I think. We got those from our mother.”

“People say I look like my sister too, but I don’t really see it, if I’m being honest,” he chuckles lightly.

“Yeah? Why?”

“No idea,” he shakes his head laughing. “I just don’t see it, but I couldn’t tell you really.”

Sipping on your tea you stay in the kitchen with Harry, the light conversation about his sister and eventually his mother eases the stress that has been gripping on your chest from the encounter you had with your parents earlier. You’re not sure if he tried to talk you through it because he saw how much you needed the distraction or if it’s just how he is, but either way, he really helped you to relax.

Cleaning after yourself the two of you head to bed, saying good night to each other before disappearing in your rooms.

“This place is like… really huge,” Trevor sighs in awe when the two of you are eating breakfast together the next morning.

“I told you, it’s a mansion,” you chuckle, digging into your oatmeal. “I’ll show you around next time you’re here.”

“T’was nice of Harry to let me stay,” he hums.

“Mhm, he is a cool boss,” you smile at him.

“And kinda handsome…” Glancing at Trevor you see the sly smirk on his lips and you give him a stern look.

“Stop right there, alright? No funny thoughts!”

“Funny thoughts?” he laughs leaning back in his seat. “I just made a statement that he is a nice looking man, that’s it. Do you not agree?”

“I’m not commenting on the topic,” you diplomatically answer.

“On what topic?” Harry appears from the stairs, making you both turn his way. “Good morning,” he smiles warmly.

“Morning!” Trevor nods his way before he turns back to you, still smirking. You narrow your eyes at him before answering Harry.

“The topic doesn’t matter. Morning, Harry!”

He pours himself some coffee that you brew earlier before joining the two of you at the dining table. He strikes up a conversation with Trevor, asking him about school and his future plans once he graduates and luckily, Trevor is on his best behavior despite the comment he made earlier, he is not trying to put you into an uncomfortable situation. He knows better, because if he upsets you now, he will not be returning to the mansion, that’s for sure.

“Alright, get your stuff, we are leaving in five,” you tell him when both of you are done eating. Nodding he disappears upstairs as you take care of the dishes quickly.

“Is he staying tonight as well?” Harry asks, following you into the kitchen.

“Oh, no. I’m sure mom wants to talk to him after last night, so it’s better if he goes home.”

“Hope things will get easier for him,” he smiles and you return it, thankful that he let him stay here when he really needed a place for himself.

“Thanks for everything, Harry” Trevor smiles at him when he arrives with his backpack.

“Of course, come back soon, but under more peaceful conditions,” he chuckles nodding in his way.

“I’ll be back soon!” you call out before walking out of the house with your brother.

“So how long have you been crushing on your boss?” Trevor asks in the car and your eyes widen as you try to keep the car straight in the lane.

“Excuse you?”

“Come on, Y/N. It’s kinda obvious, you swoon at everything the man says, haven’t seen you this soft since your high school graduation,” he chuckles, finding your reaction quite entertaining, but you’re not enjoying the situation that much.

“I do not have a crush on Harry,” you shake your head laughing, but you can’t ignore the knot in your stomach at your own words. Was this that big of a lie?

“That’s too bad because I think he has a thing for you too,” he shrugs, carelessly staring out the window, like it’s that casual to discuss you and your boss having possible feelings for each other.

“When did you become an expert on these stuff?” you huff, glancing at him shortly before turning back to face the road.

“I’m not an expert, but I’m not blind either. And I saw the way he looked at you.”

“What way?” you scoff.

“Like he is thankful you are walking this Earth.”

“Did you take this from a rom-com on Netflix?” you tease him, but he just shrugs. “Of course he is thankful, I’m helping him with his daughter. It’s not easy being a single parent and I’m helping him immensely. But there’s nothing else behind that.”

“Sure, good luck convincing yourself,” he sighs when you park the car down at his school. “Thanks for the ride and the night too. I’ll call you later.”

Leaning over the console he gives you a quick hug before hopping out of the car and walking towards the main building.

Arriving back home you find Izzy sitting on the couch with a bowl of cereal on her lap, watching her favorite morning cartoon, but no sign of Harry and for a moment you get scared you got back too late, but then you realize he wouldn’t leave Izzy home alone.

“Hey Sunshine, did you sleep well?” you ask, caressing her rosy cheek as you join her on the couch.

“Mhm, what are we doing today?” she asks, showing a spoonful of cereal into her mouth.

“You have French class today with Lyon and in the afternoon I thought we could learn about otters. You seemed to like them a lot at the zoo.”

“Yes! They are so cute!” she cheers happily just when you hear footsteps coming from the stairs. Turning around you spot Harry walking towards the living room, but your lips part immediately when you see that he is putting on another shirt, his naked chest on display since he hasn’t buttoned it fully. What you saw not long ago from your balcony is now so much closer, the swallows peeking out from under the shirt and you see the little cross pendant hanging between his pecs, something you’ve only seen if he pulled it out of his shirts which didn’t happen that often.

Harry stops in his tracks when he sees you on the couch with Izzy and a blush paints his cheeks.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Didn’t know you were back,” he breathes out, his fingers working fast on the buttons to get himself presentable again though you wish he would just get rid of the whole thing… “Izzy spilled some juice on me so I had to change quickly,” he explains, finishing with the buttons and he quickly fixes it so he looks just as spotless as always.

“You poured too much into my cup!” Izzy defends herself furrowing her eyebrows at her dad.

“Of course it was my fault, who else’s would have it been?” Harry huffs as he presses a kiss to the top of her head. “Y/N, I have something to ask you.”

“Go ahead.”

“I know it’s pretty sudden and on a very short notice but could you maybe look after Izzy tonight? Niall called me and begged to meet up with him for a few drinks. I would call Ruth, but she is out of town this week.”

“Oh sure! No problem,” you smile at him.

“Are you sure you don’t have anything to do? Don’t feel pressured to say yes, I should have asked in advance, it’s just—“ “Harry, it’s fine. I’m okay looking after her tonight,” you assure him before he talks himself down from letting you do it. “Go have fun, you barely get out of the house without Izzy.” If you’re being honest the only place he goes to without his daughter is work and it’s a little saddening, he deserves some time out from his daddy duties.

“Thank you,” he smiles at you with gratitude. “I won’t be out too long, I promise.”

“No worries, have fun with Niall,” you wave in dismiss.

“Thanks. Have a great day. Be good, baby. I’ll see you in the afternoon.” Harry kisses Izzy’s forehead before grabbing his suit jacket, wallet, keys and phone and heads out to start his day.

“Alright, daddy is off to work and we also have a day ahead of us. Come on, let’s get started,” you smile at Izzy who nods in agreement.

Harry swears he didn’t come home earlier than his usual because he feels bad for asking you to cover the evening, but you know that’s a blatant lie. He is home by three and frees you for the rest of the afternoon, leaving you with about two extra hours. He informs you that he would be leaving around seven, so dinner time will still be his duty, but you’ll have to put Izzy to bed at her usual time, which works perfectly for you.

A little before seven Harry disappears to take a quick shower and get changed before heading out, while you sit out in the living room with Izzy, reading her from a book she chose after dinner.

When Harry returns, he is dressed more casually than he usually does for work, wearing a pair of beige slacks and a black shirt tucked into it, the first three buttons left undone, showing just a hint of his tattooed chest for the viewers.

“Okay, I just called a car, it’ll be here any minute. Please call me if anything happens, I could come home anytime.”

“Harry, I take care of her all day, I’m sure we’ll be fine for one evening as well,” you chuckle, trying to ease his nervousness about leaving his daughter home at a time he is not used to.

“Right,” he lets out a soft chuckle. “Thank you again. And Izzy, be good. Y/N will put you to bed tonight, but I’ll be here in the morning, okay?”

“Okay!” she sings, completely fine with the new arrangement.

“Alright, see you soon, good night!” he calls out on his way out of the house.

Sitting at the rooftop bar, Harry and Niall take up a small table for two near the railing so they have a nice view of the city below them. The waitress brings their order, tequila on the rocks for Harry and a good pint for Niall, and the latter man can’t ignore the fact how pretty she is in her tight white shirt and short black skirt, smiling coyly at the men as she asks if they want anything else.

“We’re good for now, Darling. Thank yeh,” Niall smirks and even winks at the woman, who is seemingly enjoying the attention from him, but deep down she would be happier if it was Harry who was trying to flirt with him. However he is busy on his phone, typing out an email even at this ungodly hour, which pisses his friend off.

“Would you stop being a workaholic prick and maybe glance at the woman that wants to fuck the shit out of you?” Niall snaps at him, grabbing his attention, but he just rolls his eyes.

“That would require my interest as well, which is not there.”

“That’s fucking sad. Really, mate. How long are you going to act like a crybaby? I’m getting tired of your long face. I get it, shit happened, but you eventually have to move on.”

Harry tries to ignore his words, eyes glued to the screen of his phone hoping his friend would just drop it, but that’s not what Niall is like. So instead of leaving him to be, he grabs his phone, snaps it right out of his hands and then shoves it into his pocket.

“Hey! What the fuck?!” he growls at his friend who just gives him a hard look.

“Harry, I’m worried about you. You do nothing, just work and be with Izzy.”

“So you’re saying I shouldn’t spend time with my daughter?” he asks twisting his words.

“You know that’s not what I mean. Spend as much time with her as possible, but don’t forget to take care of yourself.”

“I’m taking care of myself. I sleep and eat well and I workout regularly. I don’t see what else I might need.” “Fuck. You need to fuck,” he points out, making Harry roll his eyes again.

“You know, sometimes I question why we are even friends…” Harry grumbles under his breath as he takes a sip from his drink, feeling like he definitely needs the alcohol if Niall is gonna pick on him all night.

“Because I’m the one who pushes you out of your pit of sorrow, m’friend. And right now I feel like I need to step in, because you are turning into a bitter old man.”

“I’m not bitter,” Harry narrows his eyes at him.

“And neither are you old, so why are you acting like you are?”

“Look, I know that you are a fan of the bachelor life, going to parties, sleeping around with any woman you can get, but that’s just not for me, it never was, not even a long time ago.”

“I’m not trying to get you to act like a frat boy, Har. I know you are too soft for that, but I think it might be time for you to, I don’t know, open up a bit.”

“Open up?”

“Yeah! Go out, meet new people, preferably women,” he adds with a knowing look. “It’s been more than three years, Harry. You can’t stay at home and mope around forever.”

“I really don’t think we should be having this conversation right now.”

“If not now, then when? I tried to talk to you about it many times, but you always just dodged it, so I gave you more time to adjust to the situation, but I think we are over that,” Niall sighs, leaning onto the table. “We both know time flies by. Soon Izzy will go to school, she’ll have her own little life and before you could even blink twice, she is gonna be a teenager, barely talking to you, only caring about some boyband, her friends and shows. The time will come when you’ll have to step back a little and I don’t want you to stay alone.”

“First of all, Izzy is 4 and she won’t be allowed to even think about being independent until she is twenty,” Harry starts off as Niall rolls his eyes at him.

“Yeah, sure. You’ll have an amazing time when she becomes a teenager.”

“Don’t even talk about her being a teenager.”

“It’s going to happen!” Niall snaps and Harry narrows his eyes at him. “Okay, let’s just calm down.” He takes a deep breath even though he is the only one getting mad right now. Harry might feel uncomfortable, but he is not one to lose his temper that easily. Niall on the other hand is known to be a little too passionate at times.

“Alright. Please know that I’m just trying to be a good friend. What happened is tragic and I can’t even imagine what you went through, though I was here all along so I have a slight guess. I’m happy that you are doing vehemently better now, it’s amazing, but I know that you’ll be miserable if you stay single forever.”

“I’m not gonna start dating, Niall. It’s just… too soon. I can’t get into a relationship now.” Harry shakes his head, gulping from his drink again, the alcohol burns down his throat as he grimaces shortly.

“I get it that you don’t want a relationship, but dating might not be that bad. I’m pretty sure there are some hot single moms you know who would love to go out with you for dinner or some shit.”

“I’m not interested in any of them,” he shrugs.

“Then what about Y/N?” Harry’s eyes snap up at his friend, flexing his jaw out of instinct.

“What about her?”

“She is pretty, nice and funny, completely your type. Why don’t you try it with her?”

“She works for me,” Harry replies right away.

“No one fucking cares,” Niall scoffs. “And because you didn’t say that you don’t like her, I assume you are into her.”

Harry lets out a heavy sighs shaking his head. You’ve not been the only one who’s been noticing the other. Ever since he has caught you watching him while doing his morning yoga, he couldn’t shake the thought of you and he took a special notice about a lot of things about you. Like the way you scrunch your nose every time you smile when Izzy says a word wrong, or the way you like to put up your hair into a ponytail when you’re playing with her in the backyard and there’s always a tiny strand that hangs lose at the back of your neck because it’s too short to reach up to the ponytail, but his favorite thing is how your voice is a little hoarse in the morning when you come down for the first time from upstairs. The thought that he is always the first person you talk to in the morning just brings this pleasant feeling into the pit of his stomach, something he hasn’t felt in a long time.

He can’t deny that he finds you beautiful either, how could he not? You’re just a wonderful person inside and out and he is thankful his daughter is in such good hands when he is away at work. But he hasn’t dared to think further than this, his mind just doesn’t let him, however Niall’s words are now poking at the sleeping giant.

“Stop assuming things,” Harry mumbles, looking away from his friend, feeling like he is being grilled.

“Stop denying things,” Niall retorts, earning a huff from Harry. “Okay, don’t ask her out just yet, but try to get closer to her. Become friends, try to open up and get to know her a little more!”

“I don’t want to get closer to her!” he replies, but he can easily point out how big of a lie that is, even though he is trying his best to make himself believe that it’s not.

“So you don’t have a crush on her?” Niall raises his eyebrows at him.

“Where are we, in middle school? I’m 31, I don’t have crushes,” Harry scoffs.

“Okay so then you don’t mind it if I ask her out?”

“You are not asking her out, Niall,” he sternly replies, reaching for his drink once again, that’s nearing its end very closely. He needs to order another one if Niall decides to be an asshole all night.

“Why not? He seemed to like me when we met, I think we both would have a nice evening, might even take her home—“

“Shut up, Niall. You are not going out with her!”

“Really? What’s stopping me?” he smirks, knowing well what he is doing and where this is heading. Harry opens his mouth, but then no words come out, because he realizes what he wanted to say should not be said out loud.

Because I like her, a tiny voice tells him in his mind. Niall’s smirk grows even bigger, because even though Harry didn’t answer, his face tells it all, confirming what he has been trying to force out of him all evening.

“Yeah, just as I thought,” he laughs, taking a few gulps from his beer. “I’m not telling you to fuck her brains out immediately, but it might be nice if you just got to know her a bit more. And if things seem to take, like… a turn, if you know what I mean, don’t chicken out, just go with it.”

“You know, Niall, you should worry about your own love life the way you worry about mine.”

“There’s nothing to worry about!” He beams, clearly without a worry. “I’m too good of a catch to be tied down, so I’m enjoying life to the fullest right now.”

“Aren’t you tired of waking up next to a different woman every morning?” Harry sighs, feeling exhausted just to think about the way his friend lives.

“Don’t judge for something you never tried. I like it, it fulfills all my needs, why should I change?”

“Because you worry about me ending up alone when it’s most likely gonna be you.” Harry gives him a look, but it doesn’t seem to affect him. He shrugs it off easily.

“Difference is that I like being alone, but you don’t. You are wired to have a partner in the long run while I’m perfectly fine with my adventures. So do me a favor, and be less of a little hermit. You’ll thank me later.”

Niall’s words stick to Harry’s head more than he would have liked it. The two friends stay at the bar until about midnight and while Harry leaves to go straight home, Niall heads to another direction with the pretty waitress on his arm, who served their drinks relentlessly all night.

Arriving back home Harry tips the driver generously before heading inside, seeing that you’re still up, the lights in the living room and the TV illuminating the area. Walking further inside he spots you cozied up on the couch, a thick blanket thrown over yourself as you watch some kind of detective documentary, chewing on your bottom lip in focus. He can’t help the smile that tugs on his lips at the sight of you, taking just a split second to savor the moment and wrap it up in his mind.

“Hey, why are you still up?” he questions walking inside. Your eyes tear away from the screen, blinking up at him as you smile slightly, pushing yourself up into a sitting position. Rounding the couch Harry joins you, sitting down as he runs a hand through his hair.

“Got caught up a little,” you chuckle, nodding your head towards the TV. “Did you have a good time?”

“As much as it’s possible to have a good time with Niall around,” he chuckles, making you smile.

“He is not that bad, is he?”

“He can be a little asshole sometimes,” he admits. “But it was fine, we had a nice… talk.”

“I’m glad,” you smile sheepishly, before turning back to the TV.

Harry’s eyes snap to the screen as well, but he is not following the case at all, his mind is busy thinking about everything Niall has told him.

It really has been three long and torturous years without his beloved wife and just as Niall said, the beginning of this time was almost lethal. He never thought there would be a day when he would wake up and not feel like curling up into a ball and just cry all day. Those times are now gone, because with a lot of help from his friends, family and even a therapist, he was able to find his purpose in life again: his daughter.

Harry knows that his friend is right, he can’t live his life on his own, that’s just not how he is built, but it’s not as easy as it seems. Especially with the haunting thoughts he has been harboring, kept away from everyone in his life, because he has always been too afraid to say them out loud. That would make them become even realer than they already feel to him.

Sitting on the couch next to Harry you glance at him for a second and can almost see the gears turning in his head.

“Everything alright?” you softly ask. His green eyes flicker over to you, as if he is debating whether he should talk or not.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Of course,” you nod.

“But it’s kind of personal.”

“Okay, then ask and I’ll decide if I want to answer or not,” you chuckle softly, pushing yourself up a little so you can focus on him better.

“After things ended with your… ex, when you found out that he was cheating on you… How long did it take you to get back out to the field, if you know what I mean.”

His question surprises you, it really is a personal matter and you’re not sure why he felt the need to ask you about it especially now, but you have a guess why it’s relatable for him. You lost someone you loved and though the situation is a very different nature, somehow it’s still similar in a way.

“Well, I told you earlier that it was the kind of situation where I blamed myself for what he did,” you start off and Harry nods, patiently and curiously listening to what you are saying. “I was convinced that he cheated because I wasn’t enough, because I didn’t give him everything he wanted and that it was all my fault. It took me weeks to see clearly and realize that even if I wasn’t giving him everything, it wouldn’t have given him the right to cheat on me. Sometimes it’s really hard to lift the blame off yourself, especially when you were the one putting it there.”

Harry’s lips part at your words and because he is not speaking, you’re not sure if it’s the good or bad kind. You really wish you could just read his honest thoughts, but it seems like he is keeping them to himself so you continue.

“I think it took me a good, like… four months to actually move on. I went on a date for the first time about six months after Keith and I broke up. I’m not saying I’m over the fact that I was cheated on, but it’s not stopping me anymore to live my life. I had to accept that just because of what happened, I still deserve happiness and to be loved.”

Love is a beautiful thing, but it’s very powerful and you learned it the hard way. To love and be loved is essential, love makes life so much better and more special, but it can also scar you terribly and leave you dried out and in pain. You have to learn to accept the love you get and remember it whenever you are not getting enough. It’s a rollercoaster, but the highs make the whole ride worth it.

Harry stays silent as you turn your attention back at the TV, seeing that he is busy chewing on your words. Whatever his reason was to ask you, he is clearly processing the answer he got, making his own conclusions and you wouldn’t want to bother him while he does that.

The documentary soon ends and you realize how late it really is. Saturday is your day off, but you don’t want to sleep through the whole thing, you have a few errands to run. So switching the TV off you fold the blanket and drop it into the basket next to the couch. Harry snaps out of his thoughts when you stand up from the couch, realizing that you’ve shut the TV off already.

“I’m going to bed, you should too,” you smile at him softly as he nods, standing up as well.

You’re already on the stairs when Harry calls out after you. Turning around you keep one foot on the next step, glancing over at him, still standing by the couch.

“I’m… I’m really sorry he couldn’t appreciate you.”

You smile at him warmly, because it says so much about him as a person. Apologizing for something he had absolutely no control over, something someone else did, someone he doesn’t even know. Yet he still felt the need to say sorry.

“It’s alright. I’ll find the person who’ll give me the love I deserve,” you tell him before turning back around and walking away.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

-

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[calpops]

less lonely | l.h.

You move in with Luke and he realizes all of the time he’s missed out on with you and his son.

From my prompt list: I can’t do this anymore & stay with me

1.3k words

living with luke masterlist | feedback and reblogs mean the world

Copyright © 2021 calpops. All rights reserved. This original work is not allowed to be reposted on any platform in any format (translations included).

Luke looks around his house, the once clean and comfortable home turned upside down. Boxes and suitcases litter the floor and footprints sweep across the tile from friends helping in the endeavor to move you and Luke’s son in. Luke’s still in awe and shock at the revelations you brought to his doorstep the previous day but an excitement sits in his heart that he can’t deny. His son sits in a baby swing and giggles as Luke crouches down to face him. Robbie reaches a hand up and gives Luke a grin.

“Hey bud,” Luke coos and takes Robbie’s small hand, the baby’s fingers tiny in his hold. “Welcome home.”

“I think he likes it here,” Luke hears you say from behind him, he spins on his heel and faces you, stands to be at eye level and watches as you place a box on the coffee table.

“I hope so,” he mutters, runs a hand through his hair and eyes all of the things that have accumulated around the house. “Is that the last of it?” Luke asks as the door shuts behind Ashton and Michael both toting boxes. Affirmative nods come Luke’s way. “Lotta stuff for two people.”

You laugh and Luke feels a little lighter through all of the adjustments. “Believe it or not, most of it is his,” you retort and send a fond smile over to Robbie. “I may have gone a little overboard.”

Luke shakes his head, knowing that he would have done the same if given the chance. He can’t imagine what he would have done for his son as a newborn, he doesn’t know what ridiculous things he would have sought out. It hits him once again that there’s eight missing months standing between them. His heart aches and his mind wanders through the time he lost but he shakes himself, knowing that letting himself drown in those missing pieces won’t do anyone any good.

“It’s too bad Cal’s not here to help,” Ashton chides lightly even though everyone knows why and would never hold it against him.

“Have you heard from him? How’s Mila doing?” Michael asks and Luke tunes in for an update; his favorite niece fighting an illness that’s left Calum by her side at all times.

“Better,” Ashton informs and the entire room lightens. Luke catches his breath and peers over at Robbie, unable to imagine what it must be like to be in Calum’s shoes. “Cal said if she’s doing even better by the weekend we can go see her.”

Luke leans back down to Robbie and picks him up, suddenly needing to know that he’s okay. Protective instincts kicking into gear at the mention of Mila and the anxiety that looms. Luke rocks Robbie, swaying himself from side to side as the eight month old delights in the motion.

“We’ll go meet Mila, huh, I think you two will be best buds,” Luke whispers with all of the hope his heart can muster.

Ashton and Michael stay long enough to help build and set up the essentials. They stay until it’s dark and rejoice in the new bundle of joy that’s joined the family. Michael makes promises that Robbie is his favorite nephew and vows that this time he’ll be the favorite uncle. Ashton only chuckles and waves a hand at his friend. The day goes by smoothly and Luke finds himself restless as night claims the sky and silence settles into the once bustling house.

It’s late when Luke finds himself sitting on the couch sifting through cardboard boxes, fingers finding a photo album and curiosity getting the better of him. He pauses, knows he shouldn’t pry but the photo of Robbie on the cover allows him to indulge. You’d already promised he could see photos of the times he missed. Alone and under nothing but moonlight pooling in from the French doors Luke assumes now is better than later. He flips the album open and takes a deep breath.

He’s met with the sight of a newborn Robbie, his height and weight written in the margins of the book. He flips through the pages, watches as Robbie grows bigger and hurt makes a home in his heart. Photos of Robbie with you scatter the pages, photos of Robbie with people Luke has never met blow hard truths into his mind. He keeps flipping, restless in his endeavor to catch up on all that he’s missed. He hears the floor creak behind him and turns to find you tiptoeing down the hall.

“What are you doing up?” you ask.

“Just… looking,” he says, voice low and quiet. He turns back to the album and finds Robbie with a smile that could melt and break hearts. “I can’t do this anymore,” Luke mumbles and snaps the album shut.

“Do what?” you question as you approach and see the album now discarded on the coffee table.

Luke sighs and covers his hands with his face as he leans back into the plush cushions of the couch. He rubs his eyes and then drags his fingers down his face and eventually settles his hands balled into fists in his lap.

“Pretend that I’m okay,” he chokes out and feels the dip of your weight on the cushions beside him. “Pretend that it doesn’t kill me that I missed so much of his life.”

“You don’t have to pretend,” you whisper and Luke hears the pain and genuine sentiment in your voice. It almost makes him feel better to know you don’t expect him to be okay with it, that he doesn’t have to put on a strong front or act detached from his emotions. He looks over at you and a realization hits him.

“I don’t want to”—Luke begins and shakes his head and all of the anxieties inside of him—“but I can’t help it. I look at you and him and how bonded you are, I see all of the time I missed to have that with him. I look at you and I blame you.”

“I know,” you say and shock Luke, leave him coming up short and make his heart beat uncomfortably hard in his chest. He didn’t expect that. “And I’m sorry.”

Luke sighs and feels his emotions spike. “Could you really not find me?”

He waits with bated breath, heart beating out the time it takes for you to respond. He feels himself cool, the accusations and blame boiling over and sending a chill up his spine. He instantly feels regret bite at him when he sees how glossy your eyes have gotten and how distant you become.

“I tried,” you say and it sounds like a promise, a plea for Luke to understand. “I wrote you but I didn’t know where to send the letters.”

It goes silent for a moment and Luke collects himself. He realizes you did all you could given the circumstances. One night stands didn’t usually wind up like this. Without his number or address it was all just shots in the dark trying to find him.

“And I was scared,” you admit in a whisper and Luke furrows his eyebrows in confusion. “Suddenly I was pregnant and alone and didn’t know how to find you; I didn’t know if you’d believe me if I did.”

Luke sags, his shoulders dropping and weight sinking back into the couch. He didn’t know that. Didn’t think that you might fear his response, fear that he may not believe you or take Robbie as his own.

“I believe you,” Luke says and turns back to you. “I’m sorry too. I don’t blame you, I shouldn’t have said that.”

Moonlight and pain sparkle your eyes as they gaze at the floor. Luke watches your hands, your fingers curling into your palms and dragging across the length of your legs.

“Do you want me to go?” you ask and Luke feels a hidden meaning within the question.

“No, please don’t,” he responds quickly. He reaches a hand out and captures yours, he hasn’t felt a spark simmer under his skin in a long while, but with emotions on high and the night being so dark he feels it under his skin and in his bones. “Stay with me?”

You nod and Luke feels a little bit less lonely as the night fades away.

***

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[heavcnslyre]

ricky bowen x reader second series!! part ten

— (continuation) starstruck au!

first series | series masterlist, part one, part two, part three, part four, part five, part six, part seven, part eight, part nine, part ten

IN WHICH you’re leaving for tour

WARNINGS nothing :)

NOTES ok what the FUCK i’m so sorry? i didn’t realize it’s been over two months since i’ve last updates HELP I COMPLETELY JUST GOT OFF OF TUMBLR anyways here is the last part of this story! i’m sorry these past few chapters have been bad i’ve kinda lost interest in the story but i couldn’t just end without a proper ending! thank u for all the support and look out for more ricky stories :) also sorry i hate time skips too but i have no other ideas IM SO SORRY. this is so short but enjoy!

text dividers from @writeyourmindaway !!

( tags: @hesvoid34 @omgdani17 @moreidsdaughter @peachyafshawn )

lowercase intended.

three months later.

“darling, have you seen my sneakers?” ricky called from downstairs. “i swore i packed them but...”

“here!” you called, walking out of yours and ricky’s room and down the stairs. he smiled gratefully as you handed them to him. “under the bed, as usual.”

“god, i really should check under there more often,” he commented and you laughed in agreement, rubbing his arm as you passed by him. when you walked towards the living room, your puppy nova, who had been asleep on the couch, peaked her head up and rushed over to you. you giggled and scooped the small dog into your arms. “hi baby.”

ricky walked past you and rubbed nova’s head. “my moms expecting us around eight. says she has some stuff to give us before we go.” ricky’s relationship with his mom had improved greatly in the past few months. it was rocky at first, with both of them being too stubborn to talk it out, but eventually they agreed to meet over coffee. ricky had come back from the cafe with a large smile on his face and had no issues with his mom since. he even got along with his moms boyfriend, who he bonded over the movie ‘diehard’ with.

“okay. red and ashlyn meeting us at the bus?” you asked. he nodded. the four of you were leaving for ricky’s first ever worldwide tour today. first he would tour around the US, then you would head to europe. ricky made sure there was room for all three of you to join him, saying that it wouldn’t be worth it if you weren’t there with him. and, he just so happened to find room for nova to go as well. he said that there would be plenty of parks to stop at for her to run around in. to say you were excited would be an understatement. you were also extremely proud of ricky— he had come so far and this was still only the beginning.

you were about to double check that you hadn’t left anything gross in the fridge when your phone started to ring. nini was facetiming.

“nini!” you cheered as you answered. you were met with her smiling, just-woken-up face.

“(y/n)!! i wanted to call and see how you were doing this fine morning,” she said. “when do you guys leave?”

“bus is supposed to leave around ten,” you explained. “we’ll be in seattle for the first show tomorrow.”

“ahh!” nini exclaimed. “that’s so exciting! i’m so excited to see you guys when you come to new york. i’ve missed you!” nini moved to new york a little over a month ago after she got a role in a broadway show. she had been extremely busy so you and ricky barely ever had time to talk to her, but you were proud that she was achieving her dreams.

“i’m excited to see you perform!”

nini blushed. “oh, yeah. i’m excited for that too.”

you laughed. “don’t get all nervous on us now, salazar-roberts. we know you’re crazy talented.”

“is that nini?!” you heard from behind you as ricky entered the kitchen. you laughed as he wrapped his arms around you from behind and smiled at nini on the phone. “hey! how’s new york treating you?”

“great!” nini exclaimed. “it is absolutely insane here all the time but so worth it. there’s this coffee place you guys have to try when you’re here, it’s the best coffee i’ve ever tasted.”

“yes please!” you said. “i’m struggling with the fact that i have to leave sara’s coffee here.”

“oh, trust me, this place is 10x better than sara’s.”

you and ricky talked to nini for a few more minutes before she had to go and get ready for her show later. when the facetime ended, you twisted so you were facing ricky, his arms still around your waist. you looked up at him and grinned. “you ready?”

he squeezed you to his chest and pressed a kiss to your head. “hell yeah i am.”

the end. <3

[descendantofthesparrow]

Interlude - Rewrite POYW - Part 5 - Future vision and new VKs

=

-two days later(August 2016)-

Uma perked up from the small sea glass bead bracelet she was working on, a smirk growing on her face as you appeared from the brush of the forest and walked toward her, a black bag in your right hand full of food. “Took you long enough, I even started working on this!” Uma held up the unfinished bracelet and set it to her side, making grabby hands at your bag as you stepped closer to her “Gimmie, I know you brought pineapple wedges.”

You laughed a bit and held out the bag to her, taking the bag off your back and taking out a towel and laying it down on the sand before sitting next to Uma “I brought your pineapple wedges” which Uma was already getting into “Some mac and cheese that Gil made, chicken breast, cornbread, and some packs of apple juice. bone app a teeth” Uma gave you a look at your last couple of words but shook her head at your grin.

“Weirdo” she mumbled, pulling out the containers filled with chicken and a fork, popping open the lip, and chowing down “Damn, who made the chicken?”

“Someone in the kitchen” you chuckled, picking up the box of cornbread and grabbing one to eat “Harry, Gil, and I didn’t feel like eating in the cafeteria last night so we took some of the food from the kitchen that the students have access to that was in the ‘take whatever you want’ fridge that the chefs load up with so much shit, and Gil made the mac and cheese like a day ago, everything is pretty fresh” Uma shoveled some of the mac and cheese into her mouth and groaned, her eyes fluttering.

“Fuck that’s good, even on the isle Gil was a good chef, he needs to cook more” you laughed at that, grabbing a box of apple juice and stabbing it into the top.

“He does, he makes bomb cookies too.” Uma perked up at that, giving you a look that said ‘bring me the cookies or I drown you’ “Hey! Don’t give me that look! Next time he makes cookies I’ll bring ‘em, okay??” Uma continued to stare at you with that look before nodding, satisfied with your answer.

“So?” Uma swallowed her food and dug out an apple juice box from your back, pointing at you with it in her hand “Updates, what happened with the new vks? I saw the limo go in and out two days ago.”

“Complete success, we got Harriet, CJ, Sammy Smee, Skipper and Sterling, and Dizzy all off the isle, and they’re all at the dorms now, Harriet’s gonna be transferred to the college next quarter and school starts next-next week” Uma nodded at your explanation, twirling the fork in her hands. “Your hair looks really good by the way” Uma looked at you, a soft smile on her face.

She had undone her braids about a week ago, to let the ocean water properly flow through the strands, and now rested against her back and shoulders in thick curls. “Thank you” she hummed, picking at her cornbread “I've been trying to get the…shrimp smell out”

You furrowed your brows and reached up, stopping yourself a few inches from her hair “May I touch your hair?” Uma glanced at you, slightly surprised you had asked, and nodded. Tilting her head a bit as you gently tugged on a lock of her hair. “it’s really soft, and personally I don’t smell anything bad, especially not shrimp, more…the ocean and coconut” Uma laughed a bit as you released her hair and set your hand back on your knee.

“I've been using coconut to take care of my hair…good to know it's working” you smiled to yourself as a soft grin grew on Uma’s face, one of her hands reaching up and curling a lock around her finger.

“Yeah… Evie's business is picking up” Uma raised her brow, as if saying ‘nice subject change, and I care why?’ “Well” you laughed, pushing Uma’s shoulder a bit as she rolled her eyes “hold up a moment im getting to the good part, but her business is picking up and Harry works for her as a model” Uma’s brows raised at that, “Told you, anyway he works for her as a model and with her business picking up, he models for her more often and she's paying him for it, soooo Harry’s getting fucking moneys~”

Uma hummed and picked at her chicken slice “Really? How much?” you grinned, making Uma sit up and grab at your shoulders “Okay how fucking much is Harry making from modeling; because that grin tells me he’s already rich.”

“He very well might be in a year or two” you laughed, gently removing her hands from your shoulders and readjusting your sitting position. “somewhere between 30 and a thousand per paycheck” Uma gave you a blank stare for a few moments before she rolled her eyes.

“Okay don’t tell me then, sheesh” you fell back as you laughed, Uma twisting around and sitting cross-legged, picking up another apple juice box and sipping at it.

“I’m sorry I’m sorry, um, Harry and Evie said it should increase as her business grows n stuff, but right now he’s making about eight hundred a paycheck.” Uma turned to you with wide eyes, mouth dropping open slightly in shock.

“whaaat?!” she screeched, dropping the now empty apple juice box into the sand “Eight-hundred?! That’s more-that’s more than I've made in a month at my ma’s shop!!” you laughed a bit, nodding your head as Uma continued to stare at you bewildered.

“Yeah, he’s already put a lot of it into a savings account, something about getting an apartment for us in the future with room for the Smee boys and his sisters if they ever needed a place to stay, but that won't be for another year or two since you have to be 18 to rent an apartment without parental permission.” Uma smiled a bit, Harry was one to think of the future, even on the isle. He would stash away rubies and gold coins in a savings stash under a floorboard in his old apartment for when they got off the isle.

“That sounds nice, make sure he gets one with a pool for me yeah?” you laughed again, shaking your head a bit as you and Uma side fist-bumped.

“I’ll make sure of that yeah” you took out your phone and sighed, standing from the beach and wiping the sand from your pants “I got to go, Ben wanted me for a meeting at 1, I'll get the bag when I come back tomorrow, see you!” Uma accepted the crouch side hug from you and waved you off, casting a spell to keep water off and out of the containers of food and the bag as she packed it up and dove into the sea, swimming back out to her mother's old hideout.

She slowed to a stop in front of the main opening, stepping through the air bubble she had made a while back and snapping her fingers, the water disappearing off her body by magic. “There we go” she mumbled, swinging the backpack off her shoulder and walking over to the “kitchen” area of the old hideout. She stashed away the food into the “fridge” aka old spell and potion cabinet that she had cast a cold holding spell onto to turn it into a makeshift fridge.

With a wave of her hand, her clothes transformed from a tank top and calf cut cargo pants to a long-sleeved red shirt with a hook stitched to the chest and black leggings. She stretched her arms behind her back and groaned as her back pop slightly.

Uma sighed and looked around the hideout, eyes landing on the claw-shaped cauldron in the middle of the room. it was odd, being in her mother's famous lair, but…also comforting, in a strange way.

She couldn't explain it, but…she felt safe. Probably because the only people that came around here were teens or kids on a dare and were easily scared off. So Uma was pretty much alone in the deep of the ocean.

Uma walked over to the little corner she had turned into her bedroom and sat on her bed, picking up the orange blanket you had given her cotillion night and curling it around her, staring off into space as she thought about…well everything.

From the new vks, the transfer plan, her boys, you, the isle, the vks still on the isle…the future was so unknown, what she would give for just a glimpse, just so she wasn’t so scared for it.

wait

Uma’s eyes widened, drifting between the clawed cauldron and a small set of books that were hidden behind her mother's vanity.

She could see into the future!

Uma lept off her bed and towards the books, pulling them out until she found one with the symbol of twisting water and tentacles appeared in her hands “there you are” she whispered, she had gone through these books when she found the lair and in them, she found hundreds of spells and potion instructions ranging from simple hair or visualization spells to transfiguration and curses.

“Future vision, future vision, future-ah!” Uma landed on the page she needed and stood, walking over to the cauldron and conjuring a stand for her to set the book on. She set it down and read the instructions, it seemed she would need to both make a potion and use an incantation.

“Okay, I got this” she let out a breath, rubbing her hands together as she spun around and walked over to her mother's old ingredient cabinet.

The tail of a sea worm, the clenched fist of a long-dead merman, the head of a fish, wings of a dust fairy pixie, and the eye of a seer. She carried the items over to the cauldron, casting a levitating spell to keep them next to her as she reviewed the spell.

“Okay, okay I got this” she took another breath, opening the caldron and tossing the ingredients in, leaning back a bit as smoke and vapor released from the cauldron. “Oof, okay”

Uma took one last look at the book, muttering the incantation to herself as she held the eye of a seer above the cauldron.

Finally, as she dropped the eye into the brew, and she clutched her necklace as the incantation echoed around her.

“Though winters past and summers morn, the future will be shown/the sight clear and sounds echo, I see into a world unknown”

Uma leaned back a bit as golden shimmering dust rose from the cauldron, slowly forming into a shape…of the isle. “The isle?” Uma mumbled, leaning closer to the image, squinting as she watched the golden magic bridge build and a limo enter the isle, the main bridge part looked very different than the rundown broken castle-like area she was used to, it looked to be rebuilt with signs on the front. “They’re getting more kids, when is this?”

The isle disappeared and was replaced with the image of a golden calendar, showing the present date then suddenly the pages were torn off at a rapid pace, Uma desperately trying to keep up with the passing dates before it stopped.

Uma blinked and looked closer, her brows furrowing as she looked at the circled date. “August 2nd…2019?!” Uma took a step back, her hands clenching at her side, three years? The vision she had seen before was in almost three years? But…it could possibly be one of many pick-ups? “How many vks have been picked up between the six from two days ago and the vks from the vision just before” Uma hoped the spell worked like this, she was in for shit if it didn’t.

Thankfully, that’s how the spell seemed to work, the image of the calendar disappeared and the sand like magic stayed dormant, shifting within the caldron…it seemed the spell didn’t know how to answer that question “Maybe I need to make it clearer?” Uma hummed, tapping her fingers against the rim of the cauldron before it came it her “How long will it be between the six vks two days ago and the next transfer of vks.”

The calendar appeared again, now first showing the date of two days ago, and then ripping off the pages rapidly “Oh no.” Uma muttered, sinking down to her knees slightly as the calendar stopped at August 2nd 2019 again. “two and a half years? Seriously?! What the fuck?!” Uma growled and knocked over the stand that held the spellbook and whirled back around at the cauldron “Why does it take so long!?”

The calendar disappeared again and was replaced with a long table with about twelve people sitting around it, and she could recognize King Ben sitting at the end, his head held in his hands as the others all held a hand up, glowering at the young king. “His council?” Uma murmured, looking at the faces of the people to see if she recognized anybody, only able to pick out Aurora mother, who had her hand up, and ex-king Luis, Cinderella’s father-in-law, who had his hand down, seeming to be on Ben’s side of whatever they were debating.

“What did they vote for?” Uma asked, biting her lip as the council disappeared and a paper took its place, the top reading ‘Application for juvenile Reunification’. Uma furrowed her brows, confused for a moment before she kept reading, rage bubbling in her gut as she did. “They have to fucking apply??! Just to get the freedom they deserve?! Do they agree to this?!”

The application disappeared and was replaced with the moving image of Ben and (y/n), Harry glaring at the king just behind (y/n). (y/n) was yelling, so was Ben, both motioning to the paper in (y/n)s hand. “That must be the application thing or whatever” Uma muttered, smirking as (y/n) crumbling it in her fist and shook it in Ben’s face.

Ben seemed to nod and point at it, and Uma leaned in reading his lips ‘that’s what I want to do (y/n), but I can’t! When they overrule me, I can't do anything about it! I’m sorry, but if we don’t go by their rules then we don’t get kids off the isle im sorry!’

(y/n) shook her fist in his face again and turned, walking towards Harry and burying her face in his chest, he wrapped his arms around her and glared at Ben, Uma leaning in again to read their lips. Ben spoke first ‘I am sorry, I’ll try to get everything ready as soon as possible, but some of it is going to take almost two years, maybe almost three! Especially the shelter and cps agency, and the council required those to be done before we can even send out the applications’ Harry stared at Ben for a moment before looking down at (y/n) and pulling her tighter into him.

‘Get it done beasty boy’ Harry seemed to growl, his lip set in a slight snarl ‘and quick, if this takes longer than yeh say, you’ll be hanging from the mast’ Ben nodded, turning back to his desk and picking up a thick folder.

‘I'll hold you to that’ Ben said back, about to say something else but the image disappeared before Uma’s eyes before he could finish.

“Dammit,” Uma muttered, rubbing her with her palms as she grit her teeth. It was the same reason they had taken so long after Ben had promised to get her off the isle after the coronation, the council kept pushing back everything, so stuck in their old ways of thought that they just couldn’t bear to have more vks in Auradon.

“Bastards” Uma growled, standing from the floor and looking back in the cauldron, it seemed the spell had finished, and she wouldn’t be able to ask any more questions about the future. “Ben, (y/n), I hope to Hades you don’t fuck this up for those kids”

-

Celia couldn’t help but keep her eyes locked on the spot where the Auradon limo had been parked only two days ago, the spot where Dizzy had left her on the isle.

Dizzy had promised to get her off next, whispering it in Celia’s ear as Dizzy hugged her tightly just before she left. Dizzy was hardly one to break a promise, even in a place where promises were never kept, so Celia trusted her.

She just hoped that trust wouldn’t be proved wrong.

Celia sighed, looked at her watch, and realized she had to go pick up some stuff for Hades before her usual fortune-telling shift in front of the arcade.

She quickly traveled to the market and snatched up some cans of corn, cans of refried beans, and a large loaf of bread, that was only a day past its baking date. Celia took another loaf for herself and her dad, suppressing the smile she had as she walked towards the mines.

it was nice having actual food to eat, Celia no longer went hungry every other night and no longer needed to scrounge for money to get the food that was being kept on the market thanks to Harriet's crew that was making sure the merchants weren’t keeping the food away from everybody due to selling it at a high price as they usually did for the better food as they did before the program.

“Celia~” A velvety voice cooed behind her, and Celia turned, raising her brow as she spotted Ginny Gothel, Mother Gothel’s daughter. Ginny Gothel was a flirt, a heavy-set young woman who dared to blow a kiss to Harriet and survive. her dark curly hair was in a short bob that showed the shaved part of her neck. her face, which was always either set in a glare or a flirtatious smirk, was painted with dark makeup. she collected crystals and rings to adorn herself, black and dark red fabrics flowed around her body when she strut down the market place with pride. she was a part of the older villain kids, so respect came with her presence.

“Celia darling~” Ginny cooed; Celia just slowly nodded to show she was listening “do you think you can ask Dizzy if she's got an opening? I need a touch up” Ginny's hand reached up and brushed against the back of her neck where her hair was beginning to overgrow where it was supposed to be. Celia huffed, fixing her grip on her supplies for hades.

“First, I ain't in charge of her and you can go find out yourself I ain't your errand rant, second, Dizzy left two days ago” Ginny's eyes went wide at that “She's in Auradon now, with all those prissy people, so tough luck, eh?” Ginny groaned and leaned heavily back against the wall she was next to, throwing her arm over her eyes.

“Noooo how am I ever going to get my hair cut now?! Dizzy was the only one to understand exactly what I needed!...” her arm dropped to her side as she pouted, looking back at Celia who just stared at her with bored eyes “Well I could go to the hearts salon but I do not trust that mad queen with those sheers”

“Suck it up and get it cut you weenie” Celia snarked, smirking as Ginny scoffed at her and walked off, presumably to the queen of hearts salon.

Celia shrugged Ginny's dramatic attitude off and made her way to the mines.

-

Ginny sighed dramatically, rubbing her hands against the back of her neck again, she really did need a touch-up. But Dizzy was in Auradon and she was the only hair person Ginny trusted with her hair. The last time she went to the hearts salon she ended up with the wrong cut and length.

But then again. Ginny stopped in the middle of the street, hands on her hips as she pouted at the floor, she really-really needed a touch-up on her undercut.

Fuck it, if it got fucked up, she’d fix it herself.

She twisted on her heel and walked over to the side of the isle that housed the red-hearts salon. She pushed the main door open and crossed her arms, her dark amber eyes scanning the customers and workers.

“Ey darling, you here for a cut or a dye?” Ginny turned, smirking as she locked eyes with one of her closest cohorts on the isle, Colin Hearts. The only other person she trusted with her hair, she had hoped they were working today, and lucky for her they were.

Colin was a lanky teen, their heels making them seem taller than they really were. they always seemed to wear flowing shirts and tight pants, and wore five-inch heels more often than not. Their natural dark red hair had been cut into a fluffy bright red Mohawk and their brown eyes were hidden behind purple contact lenses. Their teasing lips were always painted with black lipstick, and their nails sharp and red.

Ginny walked to her “friend” and they shared a quick handshake they had made when both of them were young. “Yeah, due for a buzz on my undercut, think you can do that for me, hun?” Colin looked up at the ceiling, their painted lips in a false thinking pout “Colin.” Colin smirked at Ginny's low tone and nodded.

“Yeah, I can do that for you, come on~ you know my station~” Ginny gave tight-lipped smile to Colin and strut over to the scarlet red chair with painted white hearts that Colin had decked out a while ago to claim it as their station.

Ginny sat down and crossed her legs, examining her black nails as Colin settled behind her. “So just a touch up, eh?” Colin murmured aloud, Ginny nodded in confirmation, leaning her head back to peer at Colin.

“Don’t fuck it up or I take those red lace pumps you treasure so much” Ginny grinned as Colin gasped at that and pushed their hand to their chest at her threat.

“How dare you~!” the two shared a nasty grin and Colin reached for their electric clippers, throwing the hair catcher towel around Ginny's neck and turning the clippers on. “So did you hear that Harriet ‘n her sister left to Auradon two days ago?” Ginny gasped at that “Really?” Colin leaned into Ginny's line of sight “You’re obsessed with that girl; I’m surprised you didn’t sense the moment she left the barrier” Colin chuckled at Ginny's glare and went back to her hair.

“Dizzy’s left too” Ginny sighed, twitching as Colin let out a small laugh.

“I know, if she wasn’t you wouldn’t be here” Colin lifted up the back of Ginny's hair and started to buzz her undercut, going quiet as they focused on not cutting more than Ginny wanted.

“Smee’s boys left too, all three of ‘em” Colin muttered, shaving the design into Ginny’s undercut “Six more vks off the isle, wonder if any more will follow” Ginny hummed at that, watching Colin in the mirror as they worked at her hair. That was a question, would there be more vks to follow the six that left two days ago?… Ginny hoped so, she would love to get off the isle and away from her mother.

“Think they’ll pick any of us if it continues?” Ginny asked, leaning on her hand as Colin tilted her head. Colin shrugged after a moment.

“Dunno, maybe not us, but-” they nodded their head to the right, Ginny's eyes following to see Diego De’vil sitting in the salon chair reading a book as one of Colin’s coworkers finished on cutting his hair “-Diego maybe, considering he and Carlos are cousins there might be more of a reason” Diego looked over at them, raising his brow “Ey im not talking negative, just possibilities” he sighed and went back to his book, rolling his shoulders a bit.

Diego was a strapping young man, the older cousin of Carlos and the lead singer and guitarist of the Bad Apples. when he was younger, he would sneer at those who would either compare his looks to his much smaller at the time cousin or accidentally call him Carlos. nowadays he took a bit more pride in being Carlos’ cousin. his hair was cut into a short-brushed back Mohawk that transitioned from black at the roots to white at the edges, similar to Carlos’ hair. he wore red and black most of the time, decorated with spikes and pins with hard combat boots and patched-up jeans. his fingers were calloused from years of guitar picking and freckles decorated his face and shoulders.

Colin's coworker finished up refining his mohawk and took the towel from his shoulders, Diego stood and placed a handful of silver coins into the worker's hands. They nodded and walked to the register as Diego examined himself in the mirror “so De’vil?” He turned to look at Colin, who was brushing off the buzzed hair from Ginny's shoulders “Do ya think your cousin will get you off of here or nah?” Diego stared at them for a moment then shrugged.

“Dunno” he grumbled, grabbing his jacket from the counter and slipping it on “Not up to me, but I’ll do anything to get away from my maniac of an aunt, she keeps mistaking me for Carlos” Ginny and Colin winced at that, remembering the old days when the once runt-like Carlos would run out from Hell Hall with a screaming Cruella behind him, a burning cigarette in her hand.

Pity wasn’t a thing on the isle but many of the younger isle residents would take it upon themselves to keep Carlos away from his deranged mother when possible, even Mal had done it when she was younger and much more…nasty, it was like seeing a puppy being kicked while it was already down, you couldn’t help but just care for it.

Then once Mal created her little group the incidents where Carlos ran away from his brother bruised and bloody lessened, until they completely stopped because he was in Auradon.

Now Cruella, ever the insane woman, attempted to chase after Diego, but Diego was stronger and taller than Carlos ever was against Cruella, and easily battered her away when he needed to.

Cruella didn’t bother him much after the first fist to her face.

Diego waved Colin and Ginny goodbye and walked out of the salon, making his way towards the rundown movie theater for band practice. He turned down an ally for a shortcut and appeared on the other side in the market, making his way down the market to get to the other side of the main street, where the theater was.

As he walked someone caught his eye, and he looked to his right, seeing Claudine Frollo picking through a basket of apples for whatever reason, probably her father making her do the grocery shopping.

Claudine was the bell ringer for dragon hall, she was quiet and soft-spoken, hardly talking to anyone her father didn't approve of. she wore clothes that covered her almost completely, as her father said it ‘keeps the sinful eyes of others away’. her sunflower curly blonde hair was always wrapped in a tight bun, it always got caught in her cross-necklace chain if it was let free. many assumed Claudine was a weak girl, her small frame and wide doe-like green eyes didn't help with the assumption, only to be in for a surprise when it was learned she could knock someone out with one clean punch, bell-ringing every day wasn't an easy task after all. she had many pursuers, many of which didn't go any farther after they were reminded of who her father was.

Diego stepped next to her and grabbed an apple, remembering he was wanting a snack before he had gone in for a haircut. She jumped slightly, turning to him with scared eyes before she realized it was him.

“Oh, hi Diego” Claudine mumbled, going back to grabbing some apples and stuffing them in her black and violet messenger bag.

“Hey” he mumbled back, picking up a sturdy-looking apple and biting into it, suppressing a smile at the crisp texture and sweet taste, fresh apples were so much better than he’d ever thought it be.

Claudine finished filling her bag and nodded at Diego, bidding him ‘adieu’ and turning to go the opposite way Diego had been going. Diego watched her for a moment before turning on his heel and resuming his walk towards the theater.

He arrived soon after and pushed open the doors, walking down towards the left hall past the broken-down arcade and stepping into the 2nd theater on the right.

“Eyyyyy look whose finally ‘ere~” his drummer, Ezekiel, called out to him, as he was sitting down on the stage in front of the screen. Diego nodded to him and climbed up the steps up to the stage, nodding at his bass player and secondary guitarist as they messed with their instruments “What took ya so long?”

“Haircut and snack” Diego shrugged, tossing the apple core to Ezekiel, who gagged and tossed the core into the trash a few feet away “let's get to it”

“Yeah~” Eva, his secondary guitarist and support singer, finished with her guitar and set up the mics and speakers. “Let's do dis~”

Kuvira, his bass player, nodded swinging their bass onto their back, and helped Eva set up the last of their gear.

Ezekiel plopped into his chair and spun his drumsticks between his fingers, grinning at Diego as he took out his guitar and threw the strap around his neck “So what shall we start with~”

“…” Diego looked off to the side for a moment, going through the mental list of their songs. “Different Evil Incoming, let's do that, it’s a wicked warm-up song” his band members nodded, setting up their instruments, following Diego’s lead as he started to shred on his guitar.

-

Claudine let out a sigh of relief as she stepped into her ‘home’, her father must have still been at his church service. She glanced at the calendar on the wall and closed her eyes, he had marked it as an all-day service which meant she was alone in the house until midnight.

Thank the gods.

She walked up the stairs to her room and unpacked her food into the fridge in her room, going back downstairs to pack away her father's food in the cabinets. Her father shunned modern technology, calling it the devil's work.

But Claudine would rather have her food last just a bit longer than they did in the cabinets.

Claudine took off her jacket and stretched her arms, groaning a bit as her back popped, she scanned the living room/kitchen once to look for anything out of place, and when she found nothing, she grabbed her jacket and ran back up to her room.

She closed the door behind her and took off her thick sweater, grabbing a thinner long-sleeved shirt and pulling it on, sighing in relief to be free of the slightly constricting fabric.

She glanced at her clock and smiled, it was hardly even one-thirty, she had plenty of alone time before her ‘father’ was home. As she grabbed her favorite book and walked to her closet, which was the only way to access the attic of the apartment, her mind flashed back to when she was much younger.

She was barely 4 years old when her mother died, leaving her scared and alone in their home. She didn’t know how much time had passed after that but she knew she was very hungry and very tired, that’s when Claude Frollo stepped into her mother's home and found her.

He had been looking for her mother after her mother had missed several church services, and with how devoted her mother was to the church it had ticked off the ‘that’s odd’ box for Frollo.

He found her, and in thanks to her mother for being so devoted to the church, adopted her, claiming her as his own and raising her under the name of ‘god’.

It had been 13 years since then, and Claudine had all but forgotten the face of her mother. She brushed away the memory of the day she had been found by her adoptive father and pulled herself into the attic carefully stepping around her piles of books, pillows, and blankets and settling into the corner next to the window, where she could read in peace with the natural light illuminating her favorite fantasy book.

Her father always said these books were works of the devil, but Claudine loved them too much to care, she knew they were fake but they allowed her mind to wander to a place far from the isle of the lost.

She set the book on her lap and opened it, beginning to read.

Once there were four children whose names were Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy.

-one week after the new vks are transferred to Auradon-

Ben growled into his hand as he glared down at the new documents the council had presented to him. ‘we hereby overrule the vk transfer plan, it is rushed and unplanned, you bringing six villain children over with no security checks or going through their history on the isle will doom Auradon’

While he and (y/n) had figured out the council couldn’t change the rules of his first proclamation or straight up say no to it, they had forgotten if they got enough evidence or if the whole council agreed they could shut the program down.

Luckily Ben had been able to salvage the isles fresh food and necessities program as it had high security going in and out of the barrier and the Auradon guards personally handed out the shipments to make sure no one snuck anyone or anything back into the ship.

Only one person on the council had gone against the rest, ex-king Luis, Prince Charming’s father. He understood the need to continue to get innocent children off the isle and had adamantly refused to vote against it, and helped Ben salvage the fresh food program.

Ex-queen Leah had been the biggest voice against Ben, and he knew she had orchestrated the meeting and the others to cut off the transfer program, she was still angry at Ben for bringing over the daughter of the fae that had “ruined” her daughter's childhood and ruined her motherhood.

Luckily, Ben had found a loophole, he had shown them his plans for the CPS and shelter, where each vk would have an adult to be in charge of them and a place to stay away from the general population and the council agreed that he could continue the vk transfer plan.

But only once he had finished building both the CPS and the shelter, then they demanded that there would be a more thorough screening of the villain children. In the way of applications, they would give their name, parents' name, fingerprints, an essay about why they wanted to come to Auradon, and then a section for the villain children to tell them about their lives on the isle. And then the council would go through the applications and THEY would approve of who was allowed to come to Auradon, and then Ben could choose out of their approved applications

Ben was angry, very, very angry. All the progress that he made within the last two months, gone. Only a day ago he was able to just point at a vk and say ‘you’re coming to Auradon’ and it could happen, with hardly any mess, yes, he would have to get a guardian for them and then get them approved by the school board for a new student and then get the new vk approved to live in the dorms but, that was a lot fewer hoops to jump through then this new application bullshit which would take so much more time.

And he wouldn’t even be able to be the first person to look at the applications as an unbiased person, they would go through cooky old people who still held on to their grudges against these kids’ parents, and pass that grudge onto the kid who wasn’t even born during that time!

Ben threw down the file containing the new guidelines for the transfer plan and buried his face in his hands. The shelter alone would take almost a year to be fully refurbished to be able to comfortably house hundreds of kids that ranged from toddlers to barely adults, then the CPS?? There was so much more to that than on the surface, he had to hire people, make sure they were certified, give them a place to base out of, get them trained to be able to handle the kids off the isle who most of which were probably traumatized! Get therapists ready, medical staff, kitchen staff, living wages, and so much more that just made Ben's head hurt.

Who the fuck thought it was a good idea to make a sixteen-year-old a king? His own father wasn’t king until he was well past his teens, why did he think his kid would be ready for all of this so much earlier than he did?

Ben sighed, lifting his head and rubbing his eyes, this was all going to take over a year, at least, possibly two, maybe almost 3. so the vks would just sit there and wait until they in Auradon were ready to have them come.

Ben felt rage bubbling in his gut, he just wanted to say fuck it and continue doing it the way he was, except with more kids each round. He wanted to go to the isle and just scream at the top of his lungs ‘those who wish to live in Auradon follow me!’ and be able to give those kids the freedom they deserved.

Ben’s anger-filled thought stopped at the sound of slamming on his door. ‘(y/n)’ Ben thought, slightly nervous. He had sent a text to the group chat telling everyone about the council's interference and it was safe to say no one was happy.

Mal had never responded but he heard that there was a new hole in the dorm building wall (which she thankfully repaired but it didn’t stop her from being pissed and deciding to go out for a fly to burn off her anger), Evie had let off a wide range of curse words, some of which were definitely not English, Jay had sent a flurry of random letters and a small rant, Carlos had chucked his phone and was busy repairing it.

And (y/n), Harry, and Gil? Gil was understanding, knowing Ben had no part in it, but the other two? (y/n) had gone silent, and so had Harry.

That was never a good thing.

Ben stood and walked over to his door, dragging his feet slightly as he did. He unlocked it and quickly took a step back as the door swung open and he was greeted by (y/n) and Harry's pissed-off faces.

“So what's this I hear about a meddling council” (y/n) hissed, stepping into the room with Harry following her, closing the door with his foot, and locking it. Watching as (y/n) stormed over to Ben's desk and picked up the file. “How could you let them do this?! Do you know how long it been for those kids?! Eight months!! And now you are going to let them wait even longer!? Fuck that!” (y/n) crumbled the file in her hands and Ben gestured to it as he gave a pleading look to (y/n)

“That’s what I want to do (y/n), but I can’t! When they overrule me, I can't do anything about it! I’m sorry, but if we don’t go by their rules then we don’t get kids off the isle…I’m sorry.”

(y/n) shook her fist in his face again and turned, walking towards Harry and burying her face in his chest, he wrapped his arms around her and glared at Ben. The two stared at each other for a moment, waiting to see who spoke first. Ben took the first word “I really am sorry, I’ll try to get everything ready as soon as possible, but some of it is going to take almost two years, maybe almost three! especially the shelter and CPS agency, and the council required those to be done before we can even send out the applications”

Harry stared at Ben for a moment before looking down at (y/n) and pulling her tighter into him.

“Get it done beasty boy” Harry seemed to growl, his lip set in a slight snarl “And quick, if this takes longer than yeh say, you’ll be hanging from the mast” Ben nodded, stepping towards (y/n) slightly and taking the crumbled file from her hands.

“I'll hold you to that” Ben sighed, stepping back and setting the file on his desk “In fact I’ll remind you if it does…what are we going to do about those kids in the meantime?”

“We can't let them sit there in the dark.” (y/n) mumbled, pulling away from Harry's chest and looking towards Ben “You remember the last time we did that, with Uma? You said she thought Harry and Gil abandoned her. We can't let those kids think we are abandoning them again; we need to let them know we’re doing everything we can”

“And we will” Ben nodded, the fire igniting in his chest again as he realized not all hope was lost “Those kids will know that we aren’t abandoning them. Through a newscast or a radio, I don’t know, but we'll let them know”

You and Harry nodded at Ben, who nodded back. “We'll figure this out.” Ben walked around his desk and sat down, glaring at the file. “We won't let them down.”

-end of part 5-

 Part 5! and Uma can see into the future~!! also yep the council are dicks and prevent Ben from doing everything easily. also yep more vks! more to come about them in future parts! hope you enjoyed!

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@verboetoperee​ @imtryingthisout​ @thecaptainsgingersnap​ @jatp-rules-my-life​ 

[henrycavell]

homecoming part 4

summary: Syverson has been medically discharged from the army after a suicide attempt. He’d been able to hide his deteriorating mental health for years from the men around him, but now he has to face it head on. Hopefully not alone.

word count: 1.1k

pairing: Syverson x OFC warnings: males perspective, hospitals, mentions/descriptions of self harm, the suicide attempt

authors note: as i said in the warnings, this chapter is completely in sy’s pov! it’s also kind of a flash-backy chapter and its really short. also sorry it took me forever to update. i try not to be too heavy writing this story, but sometimes when my mental health isn’t good, i don’t want to write on this story for reasons <3 but here, i’ve finally done it! but this chapter is kind of weird and very short, but i blame how ive been lately <3  also its been a month since ive updated so im sorry, i feel like ive lost some new people who wanted to be tagged, :c

tag list: 

@littlefreya @mary-ann84 @wondersofdreaming @forthebrokenheartedthings @geralt-of-baevia @dearlybelovedluke  @promptandpros @mansaaay  @vacant-writings @80scavill @kaatelyyynn @iloveyouyen @henrythickcavill @hell1129-blog @madbaddic7ed @xxxkatxo @titty-teetee

Blinding white lights, blurry circles around his vision, his lips were so chapped, they ached. Constant beeping by his ears. That was all Logan could focus on at first, but slowly, he began to feel his body. Heavy, sore, suffering.

"You're awake?"

The voice sounded like it was so far away, muffled like it was coming out from the hall or a completely different room entirely. He couldn't place who it belonged to. He barely heard it, Where was he? Logan flinched from her sudden touch like a little pulse of electricity. The touch was gentle and light, fragile and he wasn't entirely sure it was even real. He wanted to reach out to them, whoever the touch belonged to, but his body felt so weighted. As if his veins had been pumped full of cement.

Opening his eyes for another dull second, Logan saw the shadow of a person entering his vision. In his state of confusion, he looked up at the silhouette of the stranger and saw wings. A guardian angel? 

"Syverson?" 

Logan closed his eyes again and drew in a deep breath. He couldn't answer if he wanted to.

✦✦✦

His house had been how it always was. Dark and quiet. The only light inside came from between the gaps in the curtains and Logan couldn't stand it. That morning, he had stood in front of the window in his bedroom, taking tacks and pinning the black curtain to the wall, all while muttering curses under his breath. Another morning where the damned sun had forced him awake. Aika had watched him from the doorway, going on unnoticed. Even when she whined, Logan ignored her. The second his task was done, the veteran captain crawled straight back into bed.

Aika had been the only thing to get him out of the sheets that day, but maybe that was his first mistake. The dog had grown impatient and started to bite lightly at his hands and arms, whining and barking to force him to get out of bed. Logan groaned, tired of swatting her away and realizing she wasn't going anywhere. "What is it, girl?" One rough hand ran over his face, his other pushing him up off of the mattress. 

Following Aika out into the hall and down the stairs, she led him to the backdoor where she propped one paw up on the glass. Another whine as she looked up at him with sad eyes. 

"Need to go out?" Logan's face dropped, his eyes glancing at the clock on the stove. It was almost noon. "Don't look at me like that," Logan muttered under his breath, turning his attention back to Aika. He would normally always let her out around eight, when he woke force himself to get up and take a shower, make a pot of coffee. But not today. Sliding the glass door open, Aika darted out into the backyard and Logan's phone started beeping on the counter. 

Appointment reminder with Dr. Bannon 1:30 pm 

Logan scowled, setting his phone down back down on the counter-top. Just great. How could he have forgotten?

[Later that evening, after Penelope’s visit]

It had only been about two hours since his confrontation with Penelope and Logan was already downed half a dozen beers. The bottles were scattered around the bed, littered all around the floor. The room was completely darkened, Logan couldn't have even seen his hand had it been inches in front of his face. His chest felt heavy, his body felt sinking, and he almost hoped that at any moment his body would just disappear, melt away into the sheets of his bed. 

The room was lightly spinning, even the slightest move from his head sent the room crashing around him in waves. "Phone," he slurred, talking to only to himself. Letting the bottle he'd been holding drop to the floor, beer spilled from it, soaking into the carpet around his feet. Logan didn't seem to notice as he patted his chest down and then his pockets. 

The cellphone light blinded him, a searing pain shooting through his head as he closed his eyes tightly. "Fuck," he groaned, falling back onto the mattress, covering his eyes with his arm until the pain subsided. Letting out a deep sigh, Logan looked to his phone once more, noticing how badly his hands were shaking. Guilt was eating at him, gnawing at his insides as he thought about how he treated Penelope. All because he was upset over his appointment.

More medications that Logan didn't want to take. Medications that he was sure wouldn't work in the first place. None of the others had. He barely remembered sending the text, before his phone was falling out of his hand. Collapsing to the floor right by the bottle. He looked down to his hands, still not realizing he'd dropped the beer earlier. "Where'd my beer-" his face twisted and scrunched up in confusion as he pushed himself up from the bed.

He'd been on autopilot as he went downstairs to grab another one from the fridge. He barely remembered it. Now, Logan stood in the bathroom, staring at himself in the mirror. Is this what life would be for the rest of his time? Lonely, waiting for the end as he rotated pills? No, he decided. 

Logan's breath hitched in the back of his throat. The feeling of the cold razor against his skin was a relief. It was a slicing pain but it soon became numb, he didn't even feel the blood trickling down his hand, leaving a trail of droplets on the floor, out into the hall, as he returned to his room. Instead, experiencing a sensation of euphoria. Logan’s body felt light, tingling all over. He shut the door to his room behind him tightly, wanting to make sure to keep Aika out. He needed to be alone, he didn't want to start panicking, feel any sort of regret. 

Slipping down into his sheets, smearing the blood along with the blankets, Logan sucked in another breath through his teeth. Just wanted to let it all go, exhausted from feeling tired and desperate, sad. Eagerly counting down his last breaths. As far as he was concerned, he had nothing left to give this world. No family that would care, no friends that would miss him.

"Logan?" The voice cut through the thick fog in his mind, but it wasn't enough to get him to move. His breath caught in the back of his throat and suddenly, all Logan felt was a shame. “I got your message… Thought I’d come to check on you…” 

A text he couldn't remember sending. 

✦✦✦

"Logan?" That same voice from his room, from his dreams. "Logan?" It kept repeating over and over, like an alarm clock blaring in his mind. "Can you hear me? Are you awake?" The guardian angel. 

His forced his large and sleepy eyes open, his vision still blurry like before. The bed under him felt stiff and he could feel the plastic beneath the thin sheet. That same beeping was back. His eyes fluttered closed once more, again wondering where he was. 

"Am I alive?"

[hopelikethemoon]

First Day Back (Javier x Reader) {MTMF}

Title: First Day Back Rating: PG Length: 2000 Warnings: None Notes: You can find everything about Maybe Today, Maybe Forever here. Set after Josie’s birth. Sorry for the delay in updating, you can read about it here.  Summary: Reader’s maternity leave comes to an end. 

@grapemama​​​​​ @seawhisperer​​​​​ @huliabitch​​​​​ @beccaplaying​​​​​ @thewallpapergoesorido​​​​ @twomoonstwosuns​​​​​ @gooddaykate​​​​​ @livasaurasrex​​​​​ @ham4arrow​​​​​ @plexflexico​​​​ @readsalot73​​​​​ @hdlynn​​​​​ @lokiaddicted​​​​​ @randomness501​​​​​ @fioccodineveautunnale​​​​​  @roxypeanut​​​​​ @snivellusim​​​​​ @lukesrighthand​​​​​ @historynerd04 @mrsparknuts​​​​​@ ​​​​​@awesomefandomsunited​​​​​​​​​​ @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead​​​​ @exrebelshocktrooper​​ @synystersilenceinblacknwhite​​​​​ @ah-callie​​​​​ @swhiskeys​​​​​ @exrebelshocktrooper​​​​​ @u-wakatoshii​ @space-floozy​​​​ @cable-kenobi @cool-ultra-nerd​​​ @himbopoes​​​​​ @findhimfives​​​​​ @pedrosdoll​​​​​ @frietiemeloen​​​​ @arrowswithwifi​​​​​  @cinewhore​@random066​​​​​ @uncomicalhumour​​​​​ @heather-lynn​​​​ @domino-oh-damn​​​ @cyarikaaa​​​​​ @ahopelessromanticwritersworld​​​​​ @im-still-a-pieceofgarbage @ksgeekgirl​​​​ @yabby-girl​​​​ @xqueenofthecraziesx​​​​ @punkass-potato​​​​ @coredrive​​​​ @pascalesque​​​​ @theduchessofkirkcaldy​​​​ @queenquazar​​​​​ @sabinemorans​​​​​ @buckstaposition​​​​​ @holkaskrosnou​​​​​ @yespolkadotkitty​​​​​@seeking-a-great–perhaps @kochamcie​​​​​ @jaime1110​​​​​ @katlikeme​

Going back to work after weeks of maternity leave was an adjustment. Leaving Josie across the hall with the kind older woman who had been your neighbor since moving to Colombia was easier than expected. At least it was, right up until the moment you sat down at your desk and realized it would be eight hours until you saw her again. 

Javier didn’t make it any easier. You had gotten too comfortable with him lately — which was easy to do, considering he frequently spent the night at your apartment and you had gotten used to waking up in his arms. But it also meant you were off your game. 

Your hopes that he would be on assignment when you started back in the office were quickly dashed when plans fell through and Javier was stuck at his desk across from you. 

Before Josie was born, you had gotten good at masking your emotions and framing your interactions with work-appropriate distance. Now you felt like every look set off a neon sign above your heads announcing what you were hiding. 

Javier was shit at hiding his soft smiles and lingering looks. The kind that made your cheeks warm and your heart flutter. 

“Welcome back.” Chris said flatly as he strolled into the office and threw his briefcase down on his desk. 

“You’re late.” Javier stated as he fed a new piece of paper into the typewriter. 

“Flat tire.” 

“Pissed anyone off lately?” You quipped, shuffling through a stack of files on your desk. 

“Oh, fuck off.” Chris sneered and muttered. “As if this day couldn’t get any worse.”

You snorted, “Happy to be of service.” Ever since Chris had been assigned to the office, you had butted heads with him. Before Josie, in those three awkward months before you told Javier about your pregnancy, things had been okay. 

It was clear Chris hated you, simply because you were a woman who had the job he wanted, but the depths of his hatred became more apparent when the news broke about your pregnancy and your job — as far as you knew — wasn’t up for grabs.

“Peña, how was your weekend?” 

Javier pressed his tongue to the inside of his cheek as he looked up from typing. “Yeah.” He shrugged a shoulder. “How was yours?”

“Took my lady friend on a little trip.” Chris boasted as he sank down in his chair, stretching his arms out before tucking his hands behind his head. “You get any action, man?”

You focused on the form you were filling out to get your firearm certification approved again. 

“You know how it is,” Javier said vaguely as he shook a packet of cigarettes and tapped it against his palm. “I’ve been working a new informant.”

You knew it was a lie, but it didn’t change the fact that it didn’t sit well with you. Javier had been with you and Josie all weekend. The most action he’d gotten was when you both fell asleep on the sofa at noon because your daughter had decided to stay up the night before. 

There was no new informant, but your brain still came at you with — “What if there was?” 

“You’re a lucky bastard, Peña.” Chris drummed his fingers against the top of his desk, “I don’t seem to have the way with women that you do.”

“I wonder why.” You muttered as you signed your name on the bottom of the form and tucked it back into the folder as you stood up. “Anyone got any other forms that need to be processed? I’m taking this down to Betty.”

“I didn’t know you came back to be our assistant. Maybe this day isn’t fucked after all.” Chris smirked at you as he shuffled through his mess of a desk and tossed a file on top. “There.” 

You offered him a tight-lipped smile as you snatched it up, before turning towards a Javier. “Got anything?”

He clicked his tongue against his teeth as he tucked a cigarette behind his ear. “I’ve got shit to take her before a meeting with the director. I’ll walk with you and catch you up on what you’ve missed.”

“Alright.” You tilted your head to the side as you met his gaze, keeping your expression as impassive as possible. “Hopefully I haven’t missed too much.”

“Same old, same old.” Javier pursed his lips as he got his files together and stood. “It’s nice to have you back in the office. Chris is shit company.”

“You know you love me, Peña.” Chris chided, already focused on whatever work he had piled up on his desk. 

“It’s good to be back.” You said casually, holding the folder against your chest as you walked along beside him. “You didn’t have to come with me.” 

Javier’s fingers curled around your elbow, making you stop now that you were out of earshot, “You know that there’s no informant. Right?” 

You blinked at him, pulling your arm out of his grasp. “Unless she’s hiding under my bed, I didn’t think there was anyone else.” You looked back down the hallway towards where the desks were, before looking back at him. “It’s fine, Javi.”

“Keeping this charade up—“

“Not now.” You scolded him, before starting back in the direction of Betty’s office. He was quick to catch up with you, falling into step beside you. “I just meant that I’ve had to keep up appearances here. You know?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s an adjustment.”

You nodded your head in agreement. “The last year has been an adjustment. But we’re doing what we can.” You held out your hand, “I’ll take the files to Betty for you.” 

Javier smirked at you, “Didn't need to take anything to her.” He told you as he sat the empty folder in your hand and used it as an excuse to brush his fingers over the back of your hand. “But I do have a meeting with the director,” He glanced at his watch. “In ten minutes.”

“See you later?” You questioned with a hopeful smile. 

“Wouldn’t miss it.” A faint smile crossed his lips, before he continued down the hall and around the corner towards the director’s office. 

 ——

 You hadn’t anticipated just how relieved you were to have Josie back in your arms after work. Luciana regaled you with details about the day — nap times, feedings, how curious Josie was about her nephew that she also watched. You had missed all of that and there was no way to get that time back. 

It helped put into perspective how Javier felt. He’d missed out on so much — during your pregnancy, during the birth, in the days and weeks that followed. You missed part of a day and you felt guilty over it. 

But you knew better than to expect that he’d ever talk about it. He tiptoed around the more difficult topics and you didn’t hold that against him. Your entire relationship was difficult and you didn’t see a path forward that made it easier.

Javier was stuck in a weird sort of limbo where he lived two very different lives. 

You cradled Josie against your chest as you peered through the peephole, before pulling open the door to let Javier in.

“There’s my girls,” He said warmly as he smiled at you, before looking towards Josie. “How did she do?”

“Luciana told me she was a dream to watch.” You offered, kissing the top of her head as she cooed softly. “I think we missed her more than she missed us.”

Javier’s hands went to his hips as he nodded his head, “Good.” He scrapped his teeth over his bottom lip as his gaze darted back to meet your eyes. “How are you?”

“Tired.” You shrugged, before walking towards the sofa. “But I’m so glad that I’m back at work. I missed it.”

“It was nice to look across the office and see you sitting there,” Javier drawled out as he pulled off his leather jacket, draping it over the back of the sofa before he sat down beside you. 

“My firearms certification got approved.” You told him as you readjusted Josie in your arms so she could see Javier better. “I’ve got the course on Friday. I’m hoping that it means I have a chance to get back in the field… with you.” 

Javier’s lips drew upwards at the corners, “Yeah?”

“It’s one step in the right direction, at least.” You shrugged. “You wanna hold her?” He nodded and you shifted so you could settle her into his arms. “I think she missed you more than me.”

Javier chuckled, “I don’t know about that, baby.”

You grinned at him, “Look at the way she’s looking at you.” You pointed out, watching as Josie looked up at him with a wide-eyed and marveling gaze. “And I seem to remember the way she was always kicking when you were around.” 

He brushed his knuckles against her cheek gently, “Think we might have a daddy’s girl on our hands?”

“I know we do.” You slid your hand under his arm, curling your fingers around his arm at the elbow as you leaned against him and rested your head on his shoulder. “Are you staying tonight?”

“Do you want me to?”

You squeezed his arm three short times, “Yes.” 

Javier turned his head and pressed a kiss to your forehead. “I won’t be here tomorrow night. I’ve got a lead to work outside of the city. I could swing by, but it would be late.”

“Javier?”

“Hmm?”

You played with the soft hair that curled around his ear, “I trust you.”

“I don’t want to fuck this up, baby.” Javier admitted. “This shit isn’t easy, but it’s worth it.” He exhaled heavily as he stared down at Josie as she curled her fingers around his thumb and tried to suck on it. 

“I know.” You pressed your lips against the curve of his shoulder and let them linger there as you sighed. “But work comes first.”

Javier’s brows drew together, his lips moving like he meant to say something more than a simple, “Yeah.” 

You trailed your fingers back towards the nape of his neck, ruffling the hair there as you watched his face. “I don’t mind if you show up late.”

“I don’t want to wake you up.”

“I’m getting pretty good at surviving on limited sleep.” You whispered, nodding your head towards Josie as she was slowly batting her eyes up at both of you. “I should feed her and get her down for the night.”

His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he hesitated for just a fraction of a second before nodding. “I’ll go grab my bag out of the car.”

“Alright,” You said softly as you ran your hand down his arm and squeezed. “We’ll be waiting for you.” You promised as you took Josie from him. 

Javier rested his hand on your leg, giving it three squeezes before he hauled himself off the sofa. “We’re good, right?”

“Javi,” You shook your head incredulously. “Why wouldn’t we be?”

He shrugged, dragging his fingers through his hair. “I don’t know. I’m gonna go grab my bags.” 

You chewed on your bottom lip as you watched him walk away, your heart aching just a little at how uncertain he still was in your relationship. You couldn’t blame him — you felt the same way most of the time, you just tried to ignore it. 

Going back to work would be an adjustment. Figuring out how to navigate the duality of your relationship — professional and private — would be a challenge. But it was worth it. 

[anakinthetrashking]

Ok, so you reblogged my post about bnha fic recs and I also looked through the ones you linked and I LOVED THEM. If its alright to ask, would you happen to have more Protective Aizawa or possibly Dadmic or Protective Present Mic? Also Protective Midnight or Momnight? Only if you have! Thanks! -bnhastanning

I somehow stupidly lost my reply to this ask, not once, but TWICE. at the end, when i was almost done. im so sorry but this will be the crappiest version yet... (also! hello, fellow batfam fan... *spiderman pointing meme*)

I read a lot of fic and i loooooove sharing them with people, so thanks for giving me an excuse to do this!! :D

lots of fics, so im putting them under the read more! One of these days I’ll get around to making more organized fic rec posts...

Dadmic: only a couple, and tbh i think they have more dadzawa in them?? Secondary Colors by NaoNazo

"You got pushed down the stairs... and you're apologizing for it," he stated blandly. "That seems counterintuitive." "Um... sorry?" Izuku whispered. He was starting to shake a little, adrenaline flooding his veins and leaving him cold. He had no idea what Purple was going for with his blunt statements and the hand reaching toward his shoulder as if to steady him, but apologizing was generally safe. "You don't have to apologize, dude. I don't know your name, but I doubt it's actually Deku." "Um. Midoriya." Izuku peered sideways at Purple as they rounded the corner. "Izuku Midoriya. Deku is just, um, just what my... friends call me." He winced. "Sounds real friendly."

and Cat Days by Griffinrose

Izuku has a shapeshifting quirk. He's not the best at controlling it, especially under stress. So when tragedy strikes and he gets lost in the city, he's stuck as a cat. At least he found a nice underground hero to take him in?

Pied Piper by Blackholeca has some really great concerned Dadmic in recent chapters!!

If they wouldn’t give him a chance then the solution seemed simple, he’d give himself one. He’d force the world to see him, force them to recognize his hard work. He wasn’t missing a quirk, it was simply that everyone else had been given an advantage. He wasn’t broken, or useless, or incapable, and he’d prove it by outrunning all of them, he who was quirkless, he who had started in last.

As for momnight, there are also only a couple, and im also not caught up with these either. i have a little bit more of an excuse with these, as Indefinite by OwlF45 is really REALLY long, as well as intense. Worth the read though! I just gotta catch up! So much mindblowing stuff in that, and the Momnight is really sweet.

It comes with the package deal of a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Midoriya gets another chance at life, but he must throw it away when that dreaded day comes. After all, a life for nineteen is more than a fair trade.

Or: the world will rise or fall, and it depends on one boy protecting Class 1-A to prevent the inevitable.

The other Momnight one I have is A Single Reason by TheDeepSeaWitch. Also really good, but really intense and I’ve had to take a break because I was getting a bit depressed, whoops. But I liked it!

Training begins the next day, and doesn’t stop for any reason. They wait for heroes, then for police, then for anyone to save them, but nobody comes.

It’s only a month before Izuku forgets their names. It’s a year before he forgets his own.

It’s only a chance meeting with an impassioned soul eight long, painful years later that saves them.

---------------------------------

They thought they were lost forever, that there was no future out there for them with their scars so visible and the blood on their hands still pungent and red. But if they have the strength to try, then perhaps, one day, they may yet find their forgiveness, and rediscover themselves along the way.

The Reforming Villains AU nobody asked for.

For Dadzawa:

Flare Signal by achievingelsium, of course! Annie writes some of my absolute fav dadzawa content, so definitely check it out!!

AU. Midoriya Izuku shouldn't be surprised he ended up like this: hiding the secret of One for All from his own father, the notorious villain Dragon. The path to being a hero is a hard one.

Or; Izuku is an aspiring hero forced to work for his father’s villain organization. Then he runs into All Might.

Izuku Ya’broker by Dreamillusions, is a fic i loved a LOT.

Perhaps you should actually listen to the news every once in a while, so you wouldn't end up in these kinds of situations. What kinds of situations? Glad you asked. Look at Izuku, for example. You would think Izuku would be at home after school, safe and sound from anyone attempting to, you know, kill him. But no, Izuku decided to roam around. Because of a bet. This is the kind of a situation you shouldn't end up in. Don't be Izuku.

Butterfly by aconstantstateofbladerunner, is rightfully popular! It has some horror/suspense themes though, so if thats not your style, try one of Blade’s other fics!! She’s a seriously good writer.

The first over-night trip off campus since the training camp was supposed to be a fun break from more intense work back home.  But between a bleak introduction to chaos theory, a chilly reception from the locals, and the looming threat of a villain attack, Izuku has too much on his mind to properly enjoy the fresh air.  But those worries are a light breeze compared to the hurricane that accompanies what he finds on the outskirts of town.

Or rather, what finds him.

A House Divided Against Itself by BeyondTheClouds777, another one of my fav fics by a great writer!

"Become a villain," they said.

“I’ll be a villain,” he said.

He lied. He’s only there so he can tear apart the League of Villains from the inside out.

The scars we carry by Banana_Ink is a great AU with plenty of Dadzawa

Aizawa rescued Izuku from the league of villains and takes care of the child for now. Izuku has two quirks in this AU, one natural - Forced Quirk Activation - and one that AFO 'gifted' him with - Self-Heal. He has a pretty big handprint-scar on his face and started as a problem child, scared and wary of people. But Aizawa managed to help him slowly heal.

This AU is just some silly little thing I came up in my freetime and like to add to it as I go, so I don't have a plan at all. Mostly I write for fun so I hope you might enjoy this as well :D

Ticked Off by Xenolis is a fic that I just want to rec all the time,,, for some reason...

~ ON HIATUS/OCCASIONAL UPDATES ~ Midoriya Izuku attracted trouble. It was just a fact of life – the sky was blue, the grass was green, and Izuku constantly found himself in an absurd number of deadly situations. He was okay with that. Mortal peril was an average Tuesday afternoon for a Pro Hero like him. Being kidnapped was practically a holiday. Saving civilians as a building collapsed around him was easier than facing his worried mum afterwards. He had dealt with All Might's disappointed dad stare and only cried for two hours afterwards. A serial killing villain with an unknown Quirk would be no problem! ..but even Izuku had to admit that being sent back in time to his first day at UA wasn't on the agenda. Still, there was no-one more spitefully determined than him – he was going to make the most of it. Yeah, good luck, heroes and villains alike! Deku was here to cause mischief and love his friends!

Toward A Bright Future by LazyRainDancer holds a special, soft place in my heart. I always want to go reread it after watching the show and I always want to rewatch the show after reading it. it never ends

You wake up at UA, the highest ranked hero school in the country, with no recollection of how you got there. Unfortunately, those aren't the only memories you're missing. Still, you can't let a little amnesia get in the way of you warning the school about the attack you know will happen during Class 1-A's field trip to the USJ. After you deliver your warning, you're beyond shocked when the principal offers you a position as a TA for Class 1-A. You accept the position in hopes that you'll be able to use your Quirk to help protect the students. It'll be far from easy, but you're determined to do whatever it takes to change the students' future for the better.

The rest don’t really have Dadzawa? But theyre really good so I had to rec them anyway

once forgotten, twice removed by blueh, good writer for multiple fandoms

“Yes,” All for One agreed. “This will be the final resting place of All Might.” “You,” Midoriya Izuku said and paused, thinking over the words. He sounded taken aback. “You want me to help fight All Might.” “Of course,” All for One nodded along. “I can offer you double of whatever my counterpart is paying you currently, along with anything your little heart could desire. Of course, you would get to help out drastically—" “Did you happen to check what world you were pulling me out of when you did this?” Midoriya Izuku interrupted and it was said in such an incredulous tone that had the situation not been as critical as it was, All Might would have laughed. Also known as: number one hero Deku has been through a lot of things, but being thrust into an alternate reality where he’s All for One’s Successor is a first.  He has to navigate this world when his alternate self is a villain dead-set on killing him and all of this version of class 1-A. All the while, his friends search desperately for a way to get him back.

Office Space by Caelismylife quirkless izuku gets a job at UA analyzing quirks, HECK YES

It took a little time, but he eventually found himself with a job at UA. The revolving door of heroes was not in the contract.

To Repair with Gold by TitleUnwanted FEEEEELS

AU. Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me, biggest lie in the world. Tattoos, which appeared when quirks did, are when a person feels an impact on something they are told and it becomes inked on their body, the closer they show to your heart the deeper the impact it has on the person.

For Izuku this is a blessing and a curse.

An Accident at Workstudy by Galactic_Jax been enjoying this one!

Izuku is working hard to prove himself at his work study, but it's hard when Sir Nighteye has made it clear he's not wanted. But what happens when Izuku is caught in a villain attack on his way to the agency? Will a few revelations about his most recent intern's past be enough for Sir Nighteye to change his mind about All Might's successor?

Nice to Meet You? by Allwalkfree didn’t know i needed this until i read it           

Kirishima introduces Bakugou to his favorite senpai. In which over several encounters Bakugou and Amajiki learn to become tentative friends.

A Study in Firsts by Oceanbreeze7 dorm shenanigans AND feels

There’s a first time for everything. The first time everyone crammed in Momo’s room to study, a mess of limbs and books on her bed. The first time Mina burned crepes so badly the smoke alarm went off. The first time a jumpscare got Sero so badly, he flipped off the back of the couch. The first time Uraraka fell asleep at the table and accidentally sent it floating. The first time someone realized Todoroki walked far too quietly, and far too cautiously around the dorms to be normal. The first time Midoriya broke his toe on a door frame and kept walking through it. The first time Kirishima woke up screaming through the walls. The first time Tsuyu blanched at the sight of a needle. The first time Bakugo dropped, clutching the back of his neck with eyes scarily vacant and detonating everything around him until Aizawa had to intervene. It wasn’t always pretty, but the dorms were filled with firsts.

Hero Class Civil Warfare by Roguedruid extremely satisfying to read

Heroes lead by Bakugo. Villains lead by Midoriya. Seven days prep time. Three days for Izuku Midoriya to show why they should be glad he's not a real villain.

A Fleeting Smile by AnonymousTwit good bakugou content

Or a collection of fifteen Bakusquad one shots where someone outside of the Bakusquad catches a rare glimpse of a friendlier side of Bakugou Katsuki, and one time that is specifically reserved for the four people that he hates the least.

Hope this gives you something to work with!!! I have more(and am always adding) in my bookmarks on AO3, but this should be a good start! Hopefully you’ll find at least one that you love! have a great day!!!! -Ani <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

[ohjaimelannister]

Do you think Hoppers actually dead though?

O K A Y.

I’ve been looking for an excuse to pull all of this together so here we go! NO Anon, I do not think that Chief James Hopper has gone and died on us. There’s no REAL evidence (there are easter eggs though) however and the Duffer Brothers could still pull the rug out from under us but hey.

No I do not believe that Hopper is dead. Although some things can be interpreted as pretty final and if the Duffers really kill him off I will never watch this show again, because it’s horrifically SHITTY writing and im already super tired of that this year lmao.

One - There is no body? We were never showed a body or what’s left of one? We have seen bodies for Benny, Barb, Bob and Billy (and even people who were in it for like 5 minutes). THEY EVEN PRODUCED A FAKE WILL WHEN THEY WANTED US TO THINK HE WAS DEAD. THEY AREN’T AGAINST SHOWING US BODIES!!! Which brings me to my next point!

Two - They also aren’t against to showing us death. Lots of gory detailing death, WHOEVER it is. Billy died horrifically but you saw it even though hes a kid. Bob got ripped to shreds.  And even those dudes at the beginning of S3 died horribly? They still showed it. Hopper’s death??? It cuts away. You see NOTHING. AT. ALL. There aren’t even any remnants OF a body where he was standing, and Joyce goes down there and LOOKS. Surely shed find something? Gooey grossness like the bodies at the beginning? Nope. You could argue that they’d be against showing us the death of a beloved hero and a main character but. Again. Bob was beloved and arguably one of the sweetest characters in the show and he was ripped to bits in front of us and Joyce. Billy was a kid for all intents and purposes, still he died a horrible death. Not one bit of that was cut away.

Three - If you look in the shots hes not on the platform when the thing explodes????? like at all? Either that’s badly shot or its done deliberately because he’s just not there anymore? There’s the portal to the Upside Down and you can see a ladder in the shot too, so maybe he either went into the Upside Down or down the ladder and got caught by the russians?? We just don’t know.

Four - We see the devastated Eleven and the aftermath of what happened at Star Court. Then it jumps to three months later? Okay, odd that were not shown anymore of the grieving or the funeral. Then of course Eleven read the SPEECH. Think about the end of it specifically and about LEAVING THE DOOR OPEN 3 INCHES!! You can see from one of the final shots of Star Court that the gates not CLOSED. It was healing but it never fully closes. So Hopper could be in the Upside Down, or travelled through it to Russia on the other end?? Who knows. Point is, they included this line at the end for a reason. Whether the reason is that hes actually dead and they’re just being profound or that its a hint about his fate, its meaningful.

Five - During the ending the song HEROES by Peter Gabriel plays, this is the same song that was placed over them finding Wills fake body, and after all the goodbyes and the ‘speech’ where it ends with “keep the door open three inches” well. Come on.

Six - Then it cuts to Russia and you hear the “not the american” line, and Hopper was called “the American” throughout the series by that Russian baddie. Should I start waving Red Flags here or???? Then again, a lot of people are saying this could be Brenner. Okay I 100% get your logic Im with ya, and for a few days I’ve also thought it could be Brenner. But here’s the thing. Elevens powers. Brenner makes her use them to spy on a russian man in Season 1. Hinting that there’s more going on here than just super powers, kids and other dimensions. Don’t forget that in the 80s the world was in the grip of the Cold War, and things would have started reaching a boiling point for this long before 1985 when it ‘officially’ began. We were never given any answers about why Brenner was spying on this man, or even Russia. Or even if he WAS spying for the US. Nothing, it’s a throwaway scene. Or IS IT? Russians show up in Season Three somehow knowing about the Upside Down, having failed at their own attempts to open a gate in Russia. They somehow know that its Hawkins they need to be in to successfully open their gate and potentially get monsters to use, oh I don’t know, in a WAR???? How would they have known any of this information to begin with?? Oh I wonder. We were told all about Brenner being alive and out there in season two (and we were never told WHERE and this is not referenced again), but as far as I can remember Eleven has never shared this with anyone else, even though it’s completely RELEVANT information. And as far as I can remember (its been a hell of an emotional few days) I dont think were given any explanation about how the Russians knew about the Upside Down, Hawkins or anything. So maybe the reason they knew is BECAUSE BRENNER is the one giving them their directives? Because hes worked for THEM this whole time???

Seven -  Interestingly also Eleven lost her powers? JEEZ ISN’T THAT CONVENIENT!!! Because the first thing shed use them for is to look for Hopper even if she was told he was dead. Shed look, 100% for the man who saved her, gave her a home, loved her, worried for her, cared for her like she was his goddamn OWN. Conveniently though now SHE CANT??? Interesting.

Eight -  And now. There’s the voicemail message. In one of the episodes (my brains so fried I cant remember which one sorry) Murrays gives out his landline number, and when you call it you can hear him give a message to Joyce. You can listen to it here.  You can tell this is after season three, because why would he talk to Joyce Byers? Surely if he was trying to reach someone for information it would be Hopper?  “I have an update, its best if we speak in person" an update??? About what??? Why is he coercing with joyce???  Notice how he says “it’s not good or bad but its SOMETHING” and then says “we’ll talk about it in person” (or something like that) why would he be calling joyce with an ‘update’?????????? AND ON WHAT EXACTLY?? INTERESTING!!

Nine - Theres this interview with the cast specifically ABOUT Hopper, the death and the post credits scene. And I love David Harbour but, you cannot lie for shit my angel.

Ten - Millie has said in an interview “ Her dads gone, or so she thinks” COME ON.

Eleven - Again WE KNOW DAVID HARBOUR IS LIKE THE MARK RUFFALO OF STRANGER THINGS. And hes bad at keeping shit to himself. Hes already told us at the end of last YEAR, literally a month after they finished filming season three that the Duffers have told him the ending to the series as a whole. Why would any creator do this for a man they have effectively just fired, because his character died? Why would they tell him? They wouldn’t.

Tweleve - Again. David Harbour, bless his heart, I think its trying to give us HINTS and bread crumbs to follow. Last week he changed his instagram photo from Hopper in S1 to the number 6. Odd. Today he changed it to the number one :

Twelve continued - Basically if he changed it to an 8 next, we know hes trying to hint at Murrays voicemail message and this is a clue for Hopper. Because why else would he bother?

Thirteen - Theres also this screenshot from Cara Buonos instagram where she literally SAYS about him being in Kamchatka, and uses the Russian word for PRISON. (Of course this could just be a joke between the actors

Fourteen - Theres also the fact, which is not evidence mind you, that its incredibly shitty writing to have both the men that Joyce Byers loved/loves to die in front of her? And actually having her put the action in motion that kills the man she loves? No. I wont accept that. And weve been shown her non willingness to believe in peoples death, everyone and their mothers told her Will was dead and she was being crazy. Did she listen? No. And she got her boy back. Will she think once she has a clear head that Hoppers dead? Maybe. Which is why she asks Murray to investigate. Hence the Voicemail Message.

Fifteen - Its also incredibly shitty and hard to swallow, for Elevens sake too. I mentioned already how much she loves Hopper and finally got a true parent in him. Do you honestly think they’d put her through all of that just to lose him NOW? Like i said, its convienent how shes lost her powers at this very crucial moment.

Sixteen - DAVID. HARBOURS. BEARD. RIGHT. NOW.

And SEVENTEEN -Just in case y’all are having trouble with any of that it looks like David Harbour has let sorta slip (my god I fucking ADORE THIS MAN LET ME TELL YOU). I dont know how reliable this is mind you because its not coming from a BIG source, but HERE he hints at knowing who the American is, after telling everyone else (see the interview above ^^) that he doesnt know and he cant say anything. 

‘During an interview with David Harbour, I attempted to delicately get around the fate of Jim Hopper. Harbour, however, came right out and gave it to me straight. “This is the question I’m going to have to dance around–” I began, only for Harbour to interrupt me and ask, “The ending?” “Right,” I said. “Is there a way you can talk about the future of Hopper without…” I trailed off here, only for Harbour to ask: “Well, did you see the post-credits scene?”I had, of course. And so I straight-up asked: is that Hopper behind the door? According to Harbour, that’s the most likely scenario. Throughout the season, the main Russian baddie refers to Hopper as “the American”, and having another Russian refer to the mysterious prisoner in the same way was the big giveaway.Of course, knowing that Hopper is alive, and knowing how he survived and ended up in Russia, are two different things. We’ll have to wait for season 4 to get that answer. And we’ll have to wait to see how things unfold from there. Will a big chunk of season 4 involve Hopper escaping that Russian base, and trying to get back to America? Time will tell. One thing is clear: Hopper still has a long journey ahead of him; not just physically, but emotionally.’

SO, basically Jim Hopper has not left us, Joyce or Eleven.  And if the Duffer Brothers have done all this to screw with us, well. Im not gonna be responsible for what I do.

I FEEL JIM HOPPER IN THIS RUSSIAN PRISON TONIGHT!!!

THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK!!!!!!!!

[dreams-in-blxck]

Disposable camera  d.d

David Dobrik x reader

PURE FLUFFFF AN: so this is my second shot that ive ever writte, so is shit. I just wanted to write this idea that has been in ky mind for so long. Sorry for any mistakes, I speak Spanish, ok that's alllll.

Been in a relationship with one of the biggest YouTubers was something out of this world. Yo met David through Matt, a friend of yours since childhood, you were invited to his 22nd birthday party three years ago, since then you’ve been inseparable. People started to ship the two of you and you really didn’t mind at all, you kept it going with it for the vlogs, until the day he got his wisdom teeth removed. You took care of him, and he being all out of him confessed that he liked you. Everything was kept only for you and the group in the begging, but after your six month anniversary you decided to finally make it public. To your surprise the majority of his fans actually liked the relationship you two have. After a few years of ups and downs he proposed to you. it was honestly something you never thought it would happen so quickly. You were in New York for your birthday. It was amazing, you stayed near Central Park and explored the whole city. David always by your side, walking on the busy streets, and enjoying the company and everything you did. 

The last night you stayed he said you were going out to have dinner, you went to the prettiest restaurant ever, it was in the top flor of a giant building. “David, this is amazing” you said while walking to your table and watching the city at your feet. “Only what you deserve” he said back kissing the top of your head. You smiled to him at sat at your table. You ordered your food and talk for a few hours, when you were done and only the dessert was left, David went to the bathroom. The music form a piano started to travel through the air until it reached your ears. It was weird since all night the only thing you could hear was the noisy streets. The music of the piano made you turn your face to the door that lead inside the restaurant, only to found David walking towards you with a little black velvet box. Your eyes started to tear up a little. Your hands covering your mouth in disbelieve, a shy smile on David’s face while he went onto his knees and opened the little box. A tear when down trough your face and breathe became hard to you. “Y/N… a literally practiced this so many times in the mirror, but im speechless right now” you chuckled, “I love you, and I-I can’t believe I found you. You have no idea of how you make me a different person, a better one, and I honestly don’t know what would I do without you. I know sometimes is hard to keep up with all that happens but I know ill be lost without you, so that’s why I want you to be with me for the rest of our lives” You started to cry again, David took your hands on one of his, “Y/N would you make me the happiest man in the world and marry me?” You literally couldn’t talk so you nodded and bit your lower lip. David took the ring out form the box and put it in your finger. He stand up and pulled you to his arms, you hugged him back still tearing up a little. He took your hands back to his and talked again, “I love you and I can’t wait to spent our lives together” you smiled and kissed him. Your lips dancing with his, “I love you too”.

Eight months after the wedding you sarted to feel bad, nausea, pain, you let it passed. One David went back to Chicago for some business he had there, sou you stayed in L.A and made your life as normal. During the week you had an appointment with your doctor, normal checks ups. You started and drove there, on your way David called. “Hi baby” you answered. “Hey babe, I just called to say that ill back tomorrow morning” “Yeah I know, you’ve been bothering me all week long” “Oh, so you don’t miss me?” “No, not at all. I’ve been really relaxed. Not doing anything at all” “Im glad to hear that. Me and Stacey been all crazy” you laughed at his story. “I gotta go babe, I have an appointment, call you later” “Yeah its fine, im gotta go sleep. I’ll call you when I make it there” “Yes baby, love you” you hang up and entered the building. +++

“Everything is normal, you just have to take some vitamins and you’ll be okay” you nodded and sat up. When you were about to leave the nausea came back and ran to the bathroom, emptying your stomach. A nurse came after you and ran her hand in your back. You stand up and washed your mouth. The nurse asked you to come with her, and you did. She took you back to the doctor’s office and took some blood samples. “Are you ok?” The doctor said. “Yeah, I just been with nausea and pain this days lately. Its nothing” you said rubbing your forehead. The doctor nodded before talking again. “By any chance, can you pregnant?” The question took you back for a little but soon replied. “No, Im with birth control, haven’t stop in 4 years” you said. The doctor nodded again and explain you that all the symptoms you had were pretty similar to the pregnancy ones, you just went with it and waited for the results.

++++

Back home you took one of David’s cameras out and put it in the island of the kitchen, adjusting it to you. You started o record.

“Hi guys. I know this video is going to be weird” you paused”I don’t know how to do this thing, David is the expert one” you smiled ”so… Im going to be pretty face forward. I went to the doctor today and” you bit your lower lip and gasped ”im pregnant” you let the air you didn’t know you were keeping out. A big smile appeared in your face and your eyes got watery. “To be honest I didn’t expect it, I’ve been in birth control for so long and never in my mind I thought I could be pregnant. David doesn’t know yet, I want to tell him tomorrow he gets home from Chicago. And I have an idea of how im gonna do it” you took the camera in your hands and started walking to the bedroom. So you know how David keeps doing all the stuff about his disposable camera. So he left some of them to be done before he went to Chicago and I picked them up today. So tomorrow” you sat on the bed” when he gets back I know he will like to see how the photos turned out, so im going to put this” you grabbed the printed ultrasound and showed to the camera ”in the bag with the other photos. I really wanted to do it like that, cause you know how much David loves all those videos” you smiled remembering when Josh told David that Page was pregnant” and im going to record it, cause I know he loves his clickbait” you paused taking everything that you happened in the last few hours. “I guess ill see you tomorrow”. +++

Before leaving to the airport to pick David up, you sited a camera in your room and the bag of photos on the bed. You started to drive and recorded with your phone two minutes before picking David. “Ok guys, so I left the house all done, a camera and the bag in the room. Im not recording with a camera right now cause he will definitely know something is up. So im just going to keep recording with my phone down and maybe he will record to” you said before putting your phone down still recording. You parked to the side of the street and met David. Opening the trunk he left his stuff in the back and sat next to you. “Hi baby” you said and kissed him. “Hi babe” he said hugging you. “Rough night” you chuckled looking at his under eyes. “I couldn’t sleep on the plane” he said while resting his head on the seat. “Im sorry baby, I’ll take us home quickly ok?” He nodded and slept till you got back. When you arrived David went straight to take a shower and you walked to the living room to update the video. “So David is taking a shower right now, im going to ask him if hi wants food and tell him that the photos are in the bed” you walked to the bathroom and knocked. “Yeah baby?” “Im going to Postmate something, you want anything?” “Yeah some chipotle please” he yelled. “Got it, oh by the way, I picked up the photos they’re in the bed” “Thanks baby”. You walked out of the room and stopped the recording, ordered the food and went to the kitchen. You opened your phone to see the camera through it. You sited another camera in the kitchen cause you knew he will come here when he saw it.

David entered the room changed and with a towel in his hand. He sat in the bed and opened the bag with the photos on it. The photos were in his hands, one by one being thrown in the bed after being examined by him. Photo of the whole vlog squad in a random party, some of his famous friends and some of you, he steered at them the longest a smile appearing every time you came to his view. He was just one photo away from the only thing that matters. Your hand covering your hand to stop the whimpers you didn’t know you were making, feeling the tears end at your hand, you cleared your face and waited. David threw the picture he had in his hands and looked down. His breathing stopped. Everything inside him stopped. He couldn’t believe what was in between his now shaking hands. A single tear started to roll down his face. He sat up and started to jog your way. “Y/N please tell me this is not a joke” hi said reaching the kitchen. You let your phone fall and sat up running to his arms. “No is not” you said while tears covered your face again. “Oh my god” David sobbed “Im going to be a dad” you took his face in your hands and kissed him “Yes you are” you said looking into his eyes “We’re going to have a baby” he said before picking you up and turning around. You’ve never been happier.

[cloudbeom]

birthday’s and dads | KNJ

warnings: none

Genre: fluff

Summary : it was your daughter’s birthday and Namjoon feels like the luckiest man alive.

A/n: I hevent updated in so long! My laptop was broken so I had it fixed! Im really sorry my loves! So enjoy! any by the by,,, this gif,,, he is such a dad, he’ll be an amazing father one day :(❤

“Daddy! look! I drew a face, and uncle kookie said it looks like you!” Kim Sunhee, Namjoon’s precious daughter, giggled as she showed the painting she was so proud of, “Isn’t it beautiful?” she asked, fixing her ‘birthday queen’ crown on her head that kept falling over her small head.

“It really is, love,” Namjoon laughed and crouched down to her, “Join your uncle Yoongi inside if you’re hungry, alright?” he said and his little girl squealed in happiness when Namjoon kissed her cheeks.

Bangtan and some of your friend’s and relatives came to you and Namjoon’s house to have a little birthday celebration, Bangtan bringing along the wives and children to play with each other while your husband would talk and catch up on things with them, like the old days.

Namjoon walked over to where you stood on the back porch, his newest daughter, Daehee, in your arms, who was eight months old and was blabbering nonsense, the sight making him smile, feeling like he was the luckiest man alive to have you, an amazing mother, given birth to two of the best things in his life, the people who were worth more than trophies and money.

he just really loves you.

“You should go and relax a bit, here, let me take Daehee,” Namjoon smiled softy when you agreed to let him hold her and she started laughing in his daddy’s arms, “Hello there, love, how are you?” Namjoon asked, making kissing noises as Daehee kept laughing.

“I think she wants to join her older sister, she wouldn’t keep quiet and I had to step out so Jimin would stop trying to pretend and have secret baby conversations with her,” You said and it made Namjoon laugh, knowing how Jimin, and the rest of his members , did not really change that much, even after they disbanded.

“Why don’t we take out the cake now? I’ll round the guests” he suggested as he rocked his baby in his arms slowly as she reached her small chubby fingers to her dad.

“Sure,” you said, before kissing his cheeks and walking inside, Namjoon doing what he said he was going to do and rounded everyone up, thankfully they were already under the tree you were having the celebration at.

“May we present the cake for our queen of the day!” Jungkook and Taehyung had yelled when you went out with the huge frozen themed castle cake- that Namjoon had insisted on getting despite knowing how the children would litteraly tear the bounce house after consuming so much sugar.

Jungkook and Taehyung were singing a harmonious tune of Happy birthday that they had made themselves on the spot, and everyone clapped along as the birthday queen who had just turned four, smiled and screamed happily at the cake that was coming towards her, her small fingers itching to delve into the frosting, and you laughed at how adorable it was.

And by the time she blew the candles, everyone was getting a slice of the sugary cake and sure enough was jumping up and down moments later, high on sugar rush.

“Mommy! Daddy! That was the best cake eeeeeeeeeeevvvvveeeerrrr!” Your little four year old yelled happily, frosting on her lips. Namjoon shook his head and wiped the corner of her cheeks with his free hand that wasn’t holding his other daughter.

“Happy birthday, love. Take the sugar out at the bounce house,” Namjoon laughed when his little queen ran like lighting to one of the various bounce houses Namjoon rented. He had a hard time choosing, really. Everything was affordable for Korea’s most influential once band leader, and everything was worth it for his daughter. So Namjoon had decided to fill your huge backyard with bounce houses of different types.

“They grow up so fast, (Y/n),” Namjoon said sadly when he saw his little daughter playing tag on the water slide with Jimin’s daughter and Yoongi’s son, while the rest of the kids tried to shoot each other with water guns on the other bounce houses.

“They do, not long after this she’ll get married, and have her own birthday party for her own children,” You said, “But if that happens, I’ll always be with you, you don’t need to worry about being alone, and this little one knows it too,” you tapped Daehee’s nose and she screamed in happiness, grabbing your hand and putting it in her mouth, making Namjoon physically explode at how adorable you both were.

“You know, when our little girls grow up, we really need more little ones,” Namjoon said in a suggestive tone, and it made you laugh, “I mean, if we’re going to stay together forever, I’d have to deal with awkward boners when I’m eighty,”

“Let’s not get too far, you can get awkward boners when this little one is as old as her sister is today,” You said back.

“Are you suggesting a third?” Namjoon smirked, his eyebrows wriggling as he hugged Daehee so she was facing behind him, as if he wanted to seduce you without your daughter looking and thinking his dad was weird.

“I don’t think now’s the time, love, we’re at a birthday party, you have frosting on your lips-” You said, wiping his cheeks, sticking your tongue out, “-Jin’s wife is literally laughing at you behind you and Sunhee’s-”

“Daddy!” She giggled, running and hugging your husband’s legs, soaked, “I’m so cold,” She kept on giggling.

“Sunhee your soaked!” Namjoon scolded, and she looked down sadly, not used to hearing her father’s tone. You frowned seeing your little princess so sad and Namjoon noticed.

Your husband sighed, crouching down to her level, Daehee still by his shoulder. “Sweetheart, Go get changed, let’s open some presents, what do you think, love?” He asked softly, at the mention of presents, Sunhee’s eyes widened happily.

“Yay!” She smiled, “Thank you,” She smiled happily as you picked her up, Namjoon kissing her cheek as she giggled when Daehee made grabby hands at her sister, you looking at both of them smiling at how much you adored your daughters.

And Namjoon smiled, at how much he adored his family.

[hcneymilkks]

STRAY KIDS Seungmin ‘Likes’

In the 21st century, Social media has taken up our time. The term likes and comments always follow us around. How many likes do we get? Are the comments always positive? To Seungmin, it seems stupid, but as time goes on, he finally realizes how much it can change a person.

Pairing: Seungmin x Hyunjin

Genre: Angst (i think)

Warnings: none

NOTE: may or may not be a little rundown of what a whole book may be about (hehe)

Click.

Seungmin smiled. The light breeze ruffling his auburn hair. It was a cloudy day, rain starting to fall. The post-rain smell starting once again as the droplets hit the long green grass. Seungmin packed up his camera and school books, deciding the day were to end.

Few stops on the train, few bus rides and a little bit of walking, he was home. Home to an apartment he and Hyunjin share. It was fairly spacious. Two bedrooms each with a large closet, the bathroom, living room and kitchen is shared. Rent much less than what other college students pay.

"Hey I'm here." He took off his shoes and placed his camera and keys on the side table.

Hyunjin stared at the auburn boy sprawled out on the couch and giggled. "Rough day?"

Seungmin nodded his head and groaned. "I have an essay due next week, two presentations to do in two weeks and an art project due by the beginning of next month."

"Poor baby. Anyways I have food cooked, let's eat first and then tell me all of your problems."

Both the boys sat facing each other, nothing but chewing and sips heard. The sun had started to set behind Hyunjin, casting an orange glow on his honey coloured hair. Seungmin did nothing else but stare. Seungmin knew he was attracted to Hyunjin. Heck, even most people in his Collage are attracted to him. But Seungmin knew Hyunjin never liked the attention. He was a soft-spoken boy who liked the library and was an introvert. Never really into parties, loved politics, and is a member of the student council. Seungmin smiled. He knew he could never let Hyunjin go.

"Uh is there something on my face?" Hyunjin tilted his head.

Seungmin shook his head, quickly taking a sip of his water. Too much daydreaming.

"Thank you for the food, it's amazing as always. You know, instead of being a Political Science major you can be a cook. They get paid great, you get to try and create new recipes, and you are always in the back, away from people." Seungmin explained in a sing-song voice, the pitch going higher and louder as he emphasized on being away from people.

Hyunjin chuckled and brought his plate to the sink with Seungmin following. "Min, that actually doesn't sound like a bad idea, but you know how much I love politics, science and history. Taking this major is actually making me step out of my comfort zone which I want to happen."

Seungmin stayed silent, saying a simple 'oh' and putting his plate in the sink as well.

"But if all else fails, I will become a chef and give you free food for the rest of your life."

_____________

It was now eight in the evening. Both of the boys had their daily chores done and were now in the living room. One looking for something to watch on Netflix while the other cursing at his computer.

"Goddamn why won't you work?"

Hyunjin sat down beside Seungmin who looked like he was about to explode. "And I thought the younger generation was supposed to know how to work the newest technology."

"Bitch! You're only a few months older than me shut up."

Hyunjin slid the computer closer to him. "What the heck are you doing anyway?"

"I'm trying to upload the photos I took today. I need to post them!"

Hyunjin shook his head. "Give it to me."

The younger obeyed and gave the camera to Hyunjin.

"Okay, so you plug the cord into this USB port here and then plug the other side into your computer. Press select and upload the different pictures that you want."

"Okay...so how do I get them on my phone?"

Hyunjin sighed. For someone who was smart and creative, he was very dumb.

Moments later and the photos were posted, Sungmin smiling.

"Wow you know a lot about computers, you should change your major to computer science or software engineering."

"Nah bro that's too hard. Besides, I don't really like math. Anyways, where did you even post the photos?"

"On Instagram, duh."

"What's an Instagram?"

Seungmin almost dropped his phone in shock. Ten years of knowing this guy and he doesn't know what Instagram is? Oh, how did he fall in love with such an idiot?

"It's a social media app where you can share photos, like and follow content, and make online friends."

"Okay....What's the big hype about it. Why are you so into it?"

"I'm not into it." Seungmin looked the other way and blushed.

"Yeah says the baby who almost cried after he couldn't figure out how to make his computer work." Hyunjin playfully rolled his eyes.

"Hey! You take that back!"

_______________

Ding!

Ding!

Ding!

Hyunjin was confused, just who in the world would message Seungmin at this time? Seungmin was a likeable guy but was somewhat picky with his friends.

Could it perhaps be a girl?

Hyunjin shook his head. There was no way that Seungmin became straight all of a sudden. Not even his horrible flirting experience with Jeongin could change his mindset. At least, that's what he thinks.

"Sorry. I should probably put my phone on silent." Seungmin reached out for his phone when Hyunjin put his hand on top of Seungmin's and smiled.

"Don't worry about it. This account must be pretty popular."

Seungmin blushed and smiled. Oh, how easy it was for him to sway with any words that came out of Hyunjin's mouth.

"You should make one. You know, for the experience."

Seungmin stood up and bid Hyunjin a goodnight afterwards, leaving Hyunjin alone with his thoughts.

________________

"Chan how do you make an instagram?"

The Student Council meeting didn't start until half an hour, but Hyunjin decided to be extra early for the sake of some advice.

"Uh? You just make one? What's with all the questions? I thought you vowed not to go back on social media?"

Hyunjin sighed. "I know but I want to run for the next student council election as president and in this day and age people use social media more than ever."

"okay okay there buddy no need to sound like you were born with no internet. I'll help you." Chan was the current president but was graduating this year. To keep the student council running each year there would be elections, Chan had hoped the day would come that Hyunjin would run.

"Chan I still don't understand how to post."

"Ohmygod Hyunjin just do it like this." He took the phone from the younger boy's grasp, much to his complaints. Chan picked the photo they took of Hyunjin outside of the student council room and clearly showed step by step how to add filters (as if he needed it), how to hashtag, and what to caption.

"And I thought the younger generation knew how to use Instagram." A backpack was thrown and someone fell to the floor, groaning.

____________________

Seungmin started to cough violently.

"Hey man are you alright?" The freckled boy, Felix, patted his friend's back while someone was trying not to laugh.

"I-im fine." He said weakly, few coughs here and there. "Just went down the wrong pipe."

"Drink some more water then, it will help."

Both the blond and the aburn haired boys looked at the squirrel-looking boy.

"Are you stupid? Seungmin just almost died from a liquid."

"I'm fine I s-"

"Yeah but that liquid wasn't water Felix. Now his throat is all dry and needs to hydrate it with water."

"Jisung that's stupid, everything is made out of water. Where did you even get that information?"

Seungmin tried to speak louder but the two bickering boys wouldn't stop.

"I'll have you know that Tumblr is a reliable source for information."

"See this is why your IQ is a four."

More bickering.

Heated tension.

All because Jisung said something stupid.

"Guys enough! I'm alive and that's what matters." Seungmin took a sip of water to soothe his raw throat, hearing a ding coming from his phone.

While Jisung and Felix went back to the topic of Fortnite, Seungmin had opened his Instagram to see a new follower.

"No way. He actually did it."

__________________

Two weeks have passed and Hyunjin's following has increased. Everyone wants to know about the boy who came out of his shell to become the upcoming year's student council president.

Hyunjin felt happy, loved, accepted. He no longer was the shy boy in class who sat alone in front who was too scared to ask questions or voice his opinions. He could thank Instagram for the change.

But someone felt that Hyunjin was changing too much, for the worse.

Seungmin believed that too much social media for someone can change their whole demeanour. He didn't realize it would change his best friend.

"Hey Seungmin, do you think M5 or R3 would make me look better?"

It was one of those rare days where Hyunjin stayed back at the apartment. Many parties on campus and Hyunjin wanted to go to all of them. Accompanied by Changbin and Minho of course.

Seungmin had chosen to always stay at home, finishing up an essay that was due in a month.

"Um....what are those?"

Hyunjin looked at Seungmin, as if he was an alien from area 51. "Are you kidding me Seungmin? It's the Instagram filters from the new update. Gotta look good for the gram."

Seungmin rolled his eyes and mumbled a whatever under his breath. Hyunjin sighed and picked M5, posting the photo not a second longer.

"By the way, the student council wants to throw a party in our apartment, are you okay with that?"

Seungmin closed his laptop as he couldn't concentrate any longer.

"Why not throw the party at Chan's house? It's way bigger than here. Plus I hate parties so why should it be where I live?"

"Well jeez Seungmin sorry to hit a nerve. Sucks that my roommate won't even attend a party with me for once."

Seungmin felt his heart break. "A roommate? I'm not even your friend?"

"You stopped being my friend after I realized you're a loner and so boring. Like really Seungmin? Taking pictures of the sky is so creative there are tears in my eyes."

Seungmin stood up to get a glass of water. "No one asked you for your opinion Hyunjin. Let me remind you that I suggested to make an Instagram account for fun, not to change your whole fucking personality."

Hyunjin went into the kitchen and smirked at Seungmin. "Oh I see now, you're jealous. Jealous that I have more followers than you, jealous I'm more handsome than you, jealous-"

"Shut up! You're not Hyunjin. Hell I don't even know who you are. Fine! Have that stupid party here, I won't be attending and don't fucking ask for me. You have gone low Hyunjin. I don't even know who I fell in love with anymore."

Seungmin left the room without another word, slamming the door to his room.

Hyunjin stopped for a moment. "He loves me?"

________________

"Thanks for letting me stay here Felix, I'm sorry about that."

"No worries mate. You're always welcome here."

A ding goes off on Felix's phone and he gasps.

"Chan's throwing a party, wanna come?"

Seungmin groaned. "Come on Felix you know I don't do any of that. Plus the NOD Magazine at the University posts about the parties and posts photos. I can just read it and feel like I'm there."

Felix sighed. "Well if you ever change your mind, you know the address."

Felix soon left for what he called was the party of a lifetime with Jisung, Seungmin curled up in a ball watching Netflix.

A ding soon came from his phone.

Felix: if you change your mind mate, here's the address [Address]

Seungmin groaned, one party couldn't hurt right?

Oh but it did.

As Seungmin opened the door to his own apartment, he was welcomed with the shouts of "KISS, KISS KISS" and two people kissing.

Who you may ask?

Political Science major Hwang Hyunjin.

and,

Journalist Yang Jeongin.

___________

NOD MAGAZINE; BREAKING NEWS

Hwang Hyunjin has won the title of Student Council President for the 2019-2020 year!

But that's not all;

HWANG HYUNJIN IS TAKEN LADIES, TAKEN BY A MAN NAMED YANG JEONGIN.

Sources closest to them have said that they have feelings for each other and have taken it to the next level.

Congrats to the new couple we wish them well!

Seungmin sniffled.

"Stupid Hyunjin. Stupid Seungmin. If only I said nothing about opening an Instagram account he wouldn't have changed."

he could have been Seungmin's from the beginning.

now Seungmin is welcomed to the apartment with an empty feeling.

his heart more fragile than ever.

MASTERLIST