your blog actually makes me reflect and want to do better but its a lot easier said than done.. i want to know what have you given up to follow the right path to go on? do you miss how things were before??
these are such good questions and i’m so glad im having a positive effect!! thank you <3 it 100% is a lot easier said than done. for me its been a journey of seeking Jesus through completely honest prayer, getting to know the Bible, asking a lot of questions to pastors online.
what i’ve given up has come from what the Bible describes as sin. so, drinking, partying, fornicating (having sex before marriage), lusting (watching porn, having lustful thoughts/daydreaming, masturbating), sexual immorality (BDSM, kink, etc), drugs, the occult (astrology, witchcraft, manifestation, divination, crystals, etc), wrath (yelling at people when upset), cursing, stealing, dressing immodestly, and lying.
and all of these things i’m not avoiding to try to achieve perfection. it will never happen. all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. we are imperfect creatures. I’m avoiding these things because I want to be close to God. I don’t want to sin against him. of course He is forgiving and forgives us when we repent, even when we’re really repetitively struggling with the same sin. but if i am strong enough and i can make the choice, i will always choose not to sin. and if i’m weak in that moment, i repent, which means i cut off all the things (apps, websites, etc) that tempt me to that sin again.
and do i miss how things were before… no, because they all led to destruction for me. ignorance might be bliss but it ultimately led me to destruction. sin destroyed my life. i’m rebuilding through Christ. sin leads to death. Christ is the way, the truth, and the life. following Him leads to life. it’s not easy, and we won’t be perfect at it, which is fine, He doesn’t expect us to be.
these are also so much easier to avoid when you have the Holy Spirit. when you pray ask for the Holy Spirit. ask to be given life and reborn with Christ. pray for help with prayer and help in this journey. it can take a long time to overcome these sins so be patient with yourself.
i hope this helps! there are a lot of Bible verses used here. let me know if you’d want the specific Bible verses - i didnt want to make this too long :) <3 im here if you have any more questions or need support
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PERINHERI, THE MEETINGS IN OUTREALM: SERIES IV NAMECARD, AND ITS EFFECTS TO KAEYA’S LORE
Before starting, please note that this is purely for Kaeya’s lore. If you guys are also interested in the more detailed discussion for Perinheri and the namecard (both with interesting stories and implications involving so much more than just Kaeya),then I highly suggest for you to search in various social medias for a more in depth look into each! Both of these are incredibly interesting, especially since it basically involves Khaenri'ah predicting us and our twin's arrival to Teyvat and other key characters in the Cataclysm.
Additionally, this is kinda long. This is me basically giving a tiny bit of a breakdown for Perinheri and the namecard, and then proceeding to provide 3-ish different theories for Kaeya in relation to these sources (along with older information that we got). Maybe grab a snack and some water?
Without further ado, let’s proceed with the actual lore talk and theories!
First up, I will discuss a bit about Perinheri, the book that can be purchased from Fontaine.
Perinheri is the name of the book’s protagonist. He, like all others who have arrived to Khaenri’ah are adopted into Khaenri’ahs orphanage. This orphanage accepted 2 kinds of people- people from beyond (like us, the traveler) and Teyvatian.
Soon, some of these children became the knights for Khaenri’ah. The best of these knights are mentioned specifically by Angelica (someone who says she is from pre-Morax Liyue):
Njord, who I think may be Rhinedottir due to the description of them being the one who “walks with the Darksprites (war beasts created with Alchemy)”
Alf, the greatest warrior in the Universitas Magistorum (take note of this!!)
Alberich, commander of half the knights (I’m guessing the other half was under Dainsleif? They split the kids in the divorce/j)
Perinheri, our book protagonist who is called “the undefeated” (I lowkey want this to be Capitano). He also had a best friend named Hleobrant, who is also a formidable knight as proven by his track record of easily defeating other knights who were willing to battle him.
To cut the story short, Angelica invites Hleobrant up to the surface. Perinheri, wary of her, joined them. Upon reaching the surface, however, Hleobrant turns into a monster because, according to Angelica, Hleobrant had betrayed his own archon, meaning he is a child of Teyvat. Perinheri, on the other hand, had no god to betray in the first place, implying he is an outlander (he represents no other nation other than the nation that adopted him, which is Khaenri’ah)
And with that information given to us, we are now left to assume…that the Alberich ancestor may be similar to Perinheri- someone not of this world and adopted by Khaenri’ah.
However, a certain detail from a certain namecard brings that to question as well.
In this namecard, the word Sovereign is officially used, and the one talking is involved with the Universitas Magistorum of Khaenri’ah. That means that Khaenri’ah may actually have had a dragon sovereign. Now who could this sovereign be?
We have 1 more dragon who is technically unaccounted for, and that is the Dragon King Nibelung (as mentioned by Apep and Neuvillette). Nibelung had gathered forbidden knowledge and shared it to his fellow dragon sovereigns at the time and prompted them to join him into a war against the Heavenly Principles (which led to their tragic demise).
Now, why would Nibelung possibly be Khaenri’ah’s dragon sovereign? It had only been stated by both Apep and Neuvillette that he was their Dragon King.
Well, it all boils down to their source material for Nibelung’s name. The Der Ring des Nibelung (The Ring Cycle).
The story? It involves a Nibelung (elf race) by the name of Alberich. The same story also includes the name Rhinedottir. This is why some assume that Nibelung is Khaenri’ah’s dragon sovereign.
Interestingly enough, they are also the two people who were highly involved with the Cataclysm AND the two families from Khaenri’ah that have left their children in Mondstadt (Kaeya and Albedo).
Here’s the thing. Nibelung died before the Cataclysm. That means another dragon sovereign had to have been born in replacement to the old one. Could we dare assume…based on source material…that the reborn dragon sovereign is Anfortas Alberich? Because based on the timeline, it could still happen. We are left with time in between for the Sovereign v. Heavenly Principles and the Cataclysm.
This could be an alternative idea as well as how the Alberich clan also didn’t turn into monsters instead of being descended from an outlander. If they were born of the dragon sovereign of Khaenri’ah, then they would have no archon to betray in the first place either. Additionally, this is how Anfortas became first in line and uncontested for regency - the Alberich clan technically had ruling rights due to being descendants of their sovereign.
But…where does this leave Kaeya? What does all of this imply? Why is he their last hope? WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO HIM?!
Well, I have 3 theories for this specific topic. 1- The Alberich clan is separate from Nibelung and the first Alberich is an outlander/ non-Teyvatian. 2- Anfortas Alberich was the dragon sovereign who let a mortal king rule over him (similar to Neuvillette). 3- Somehow neither? The Alberich clan could simply be born of Khaenri’ah
The Alberich clan is separate from Nibelung, and the first Alberich is an outlander/ non-Teyvatian
Since the only legit proof we have of Nibelung possibly being an Alberich is from the source material, the defense could be a bit flimsy to many. What we do have, however, is an actual implication for the clan to be descended from an outlander.
The Alberich clan in itself is a clan of nobles, and knowing how nobles are, they have this blood purity mindset that probably kept most of their clan from transforming into monsters. Pls don’t ask for the inbreeding implications my mind is already reeling over here…
Perhaps Perinheri had returned to Khaenri’ah to warn his countrymen about what could happen should a Teyvatian go back to the surface, or perhaps someone else found out at a different time. Either way, this discovery could have possibly caused blood purity concerns, and thus the selective choosing of which knights leave to fight in the surface (like that one Alberich in Sumeru) PLUS the interest in war machinery by Khaenri’ah which could help them fight in the surface.
This could be further proven by the fact that Clothar Alberich would have been shamed by his family had they known he had a child with a woman from Mondstadt. Other than the fact that the woman wasn’t a noble of Khaenri’ah, this just also risked her and the child to turning into monsters as well if they moved to Khaenri’ah (and move to Khaenri’ah they did).
But since Kaeya is not a monster, is he a pureblood then?
I kind of doubt it due to several reasons… but ignoring Kaeya’s suspicious genetics aside, what we do have is the very high possibility that Kaeya has never step foot into Khaenri’ah.
Caribert had stepped into Khaenri’ah, as implied by Clothar when he said “no more red sky”. This was how Caribert was doomed to become a hilichurl- by having Teyvatian blood and entering Khaenri’ah. If Kaeya hadn’t stepped inside Khaenri’ah, however, then he has technically not yet betrayed his archon (whether it may be Nahida, due to my assumed birth nation for him, or Venti, the archon of his current home nation).
But do you guys see how dangerous this idea is though when it comes to future plot lines? If Kaeya goes to Khaenri’ah (whether forcibly or willingly), then he would not be able to leave until we, the traveler, figure out how to fix this. No one from Teyvat can visit him either lest they want to turn into hilichurls or get trapped along with him. Even if he is somehow a pureblood, then perhaps going to Khaenri’ah would just activate his own curse of immortality, which we can highly bet that this is something he doesn’t want.
The only way he could get a free pass over this is if there is something special about him… and maybe that’s why he is called their last hope…
Anfortas Alberich was the dragon sovereign who let a mortal king rule over him
Let us say that Hoyo did apparently want us to consider that the Alberich line are the descendants of the newly formed dragon sovereign Anfortas. What would it possibly entail?
Well, the only source material with whom we have had regular conversations with is Neuvillette, and we are 500 years too late to know the exact details of how that works, but basically we get the idea that once a dragon sovereign died, a new one will take its place later on, but not immediately. Another detail is that it takes an archon to let go of their position back to the sovereign for them to regain full power and, in general, better understanding .
While without an archon, there could be a possibility that the time spent missing a dragon sovereign had lead to Khaenri’ah choosing their own new leader- a King by the name of Irmin. We don’t know what kind of powers King Irmin had, however, since he is recognized by the people before the new dragon sovereign was reborn, then he could simply be the archon equivalent in this situation (especially since the gnosis is not important in the grand scheme of things involving rulership transfer when we really think about it).
The new sovereign could easily mingle and observe the others, it was how Neuvillette was able to hide his true self from the people of Fontaine, after all. It is also easy for the people of Khaenri’ah to assume that Anfortas is simply another lost child in need of a new home. Maybe he saw how the king ruled and approved of it?
This could honestly explain Caribert’s mental state as well despite having being turned into a hilichurl. Despite being half-Teyvatian, a portion of him might also be the blood of a dragon sovereign. Surely that must account for something?
Additionally, we don’t exactly have proof of Anfortas’ death, right? (unless I missed it somewhere…). Who knows what he has been doing if he is actually still alive after all…
This means that Kaeya can be Khaenri’ahn without his ancestors being from beyond this world. Again, however, are Kaeya’s genetics getting questioned! Why are the other Alberich successfully cursed, but Kaeya isn’t?
Boldest statement from me, a Kaeya simp, but perhaps while the other simply had dragon blood in them, Kaeya may actually be their next in line.
Because seriously speaking, Khaenri’ah still somewhat has its people, but it has no ruler. It is not our twin, they have decided to rule the Abyss Order (and the fact that they cannot assume the King/Queen position is still up for questioning, because the Abyss Order is still Kaeya's if we are following birthright). If Anfortas is still alive, then of course Kaeya can't assume the role of Dragon Sovereign, but if Anfortas actually died along the way of our travels… (5-star Kaeya? Pls Hoyo???). Also, I know the chance that Kaeya’s eye being different from the rest of the Khaenri’ahns are just because he’s an early character, but imagine how fun it would be if that was their indication that he is their next ruler hahaha
If Kaeya won’t be the next dragon sovereign (because I literally don’t have a solid backing for this one folks), then having dragon sovereign blood must mean something for him, right Like, idk, free access pass to Khaenri’ah without repercussions? Hidden abilities? Anything dragon involved?
On a side note, the amount of times the mention of “stepping through fire” or something similar when it comes to Kaeya is looking a bit suspicious as well. The first instance is him facing Diluc’s flames. The next mention is from his father’s notes that state that “we of the Alberich Clan should lead lives as those who blaze like fire, rather than those who wallow in the embers”. The next is during his hangout quest where he had to act as the character who had walked through fire to convince his father of his innocence. It’s starting to sound like having the protective capabilities of dragon scales, does it not?
Also, doesn’t this idea make things harder for Kaeya to decide on who to side with? He quite literally will have the responsibility over this nation. Mona did say that fate will catch up with him…
The Alberich clan could simply be born of Khaenri’ah
There isn’t much to say for this other than the fact that actual Khaenri’ahns have always existed prior to all the outlanders and sovereign drama. They could have always been nobles and a family of knights. I am also trying to manage my expectations over here because the other 2 theories seem a bit too good to be true, and I think I need to calm down even though their looking very very possible to me right now thanks to the information given to us. TRYING TO MANAGE THE DELULU REAL HARD HERE.
This does, however, make Kaeya’s intentions a bit more done by him and not for his responsibilities to Khaenri’ah. Kaeya might simply want what is best for his birth nation and home nation. The simplicity sure is nice to think about.
In addition, hoyo can easily create another character to fill up the Dragon King position as well (even if that one was my favorite idea)
Also, just to put it out there because this was originally supposed to be my actual lore post before I found all these info, but I've been exchanging mildly insane ideas with @/makiandcheese and one idea I proposed was that Kaeya isn't born- he is created as partnership of a Sumeru scholar and Kaeya's father who commissioned for it (which makes him curseless and allows hints of Sumeru in his design)
The idea was that Khaenri'ah got tired of waiting for us (the traveler) to arrive and lead the war against the heavenly principles, and so they started the idea of creating their own. This then, unfortunately, was the real cause of their downfall. This surprisingly connects well with an Alberich stealing something from the Rhinedottir in the original story WHICH WAS NOT MY INTENTION, but hey if it works out huh?
This also connects to the original theory, which is the fact that in CN, Kaeya isn't a spy, but is instead described as a "pawn". A pawn is technically a part of a chess set...and Genshin has their own chess reference, which are the gnosis.
A special ability of these pawns is that once they reach the edge of the enemy's side, they could "ascend" to a higher position (alternatively, this could also imply that all archons were pawns that ascended).
Interestingly enough as well, both Mondstadt and Khaenri'ah somehow maintained the monarchy type of system (with Mondstadt slightly modifying things BUT they also still have their uncrowned king Diluc). Kaeya has positioned himself very near the top...
In conclusion!
WHAT IS THIS LORE. WHY IS THIS SO STRESSFUL FOR HIM? FOR US? I’D DRINK REGULARLY TOO, TF? We should all wrap Kaeya in several blankets and tell him very cute bedtime stories and play classical music and give him goodnight kisses and tell him words of affirmation because this all sounds EXHAUSTING.
If you managed to survive this entire hellpost of Kaeya lore and theories, then congratulations! and ily!! Odds are, I was motivated by you to actually finish this one, so thanks!
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Cannibals, Pirates, and PhDs: How Did I Get Here?
I mentioned in some tags earlier that I’ve only actually been a real fan of Pink Floyd for under a year, and that the confluence of events that led up to it is pretty absurd. Some interest seemed to be taken in this, so I though I’d elaborate.
I didn’t know how to shorten this timeline and have it make any sense, so it’s... long. But idk, I think it’s pretty funny. If you’re nosy like I am this is for you.
My Backstory Timeline:
early childhood: my parents essentially mainline me and my little sister with The Beatles. I know almost no songs written past the 70’s until at least sixth grade. I develop a childhood crush on Paul McCartney, a joke that the universe really decides to play the long game on.
2014: my dad calls me over one night, and gravely tells me he’s been waiting to share something until I’m old enough. I brace myself to be told about sex or secret half-siblings. Instead, he tells me I need to listen to The Wall. Irritated at the idea of wasting an hour and half of my night, I nevertheless comply and go up to my room and put it on. I do not come back from this, clearly having inherited some sort of generational curse.
Around the same time, I am also secretly watching Hannibal every time my parents send me upstairs because Game of Thrones is “too gory”. This will trigger three important things: an interest in psychology, a love of horror media, and a classical music phase will train my attention span to last well past the three minute mark.
2014-2023: Over the intervening years, I become a casual fan of Pink Floyd, but make a deliberate point not to learn anything about the band. I like being able to imagine my own meanings for the songs. Also, I am motivated against this by a childhood memory of being deeply frightening by a picture of old Paul McCartney (LOL). I do not want that to ever happen again, so no learning.
Cut to April of 2023: I am finishing up my first year of my PhD program studying media psychology. I am in a bad place mentally, and am going through another horror movie phase to fill the hole. As a result, I get very into American Psycho. The main character, Patrick Bateman, is a fan of superficial 80’s pop music, particularly Genesis. I decide to start listening to Genesis to see if I agree with his tastes. While researching “best Genesis albums”, I come across The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway. I listen to it, and am blown away. I had no idea that the Phil Collins band made music like that. This sends me down the prog-rock rabbit hole. I still won't learn any lore.
Summer of 2023: MEANWHILE, I am also going through another pirate phase. I have a fairly encyclopedic knowledge of 18th century piracy (and am still quite active in the Black Sails fan community). Around this time, I get really obsessed with this one random guy named Dennis McCarthy who was hanged in 1718.
I decide to work poor Dennis into a science fiction story I’ve been working on. The premise is essentially that the universe is an abandoned simulation, and a ‘glitch in the matrix’ starts to, among other things, bring people from the wrong time periods back to life.
The format of the story is vaguely monster-of-the-week, in which the characters have to solve various problems caused by mistakes in the code. I think, “hey, you know what would be perfect for this? that fanfic I wrote about The Wall in high school.” Said fic (which that stupid fucking beatles movie stole from me) is about a world in which Pink Floyd never existed, but a wannabe rock-star discovers a box full of their records and decides to copy them. While he is touring his plagiarized version of The Wall, he realizes that the events of the album are starting to happen to him in real life. By working this concept into my new story, I go through another one of my periodical The Wall phases. It's in full swing when fall rolls around.
September of 2023: This semester, I take a grad-level narrative theory class in the English department. I decide it would be helpful to follow along with a specific example, so I choose The Wall. Using the terminology I am learning in the class, I start to realize that The Wall is…. incredibly narratologically fucked up. To help orient me, I watch the bootleg concert recordings, and the trick with the surrogate band sends me so out of my mind that I decide I must break my rule about never learning band lore.
This is where the two plot-lines converge. I don’t remember which came first, but around this same time, I think to myself “hey, if Genesis was hiding such an incredible album under the 80’s pop, what must Pink Floyd be hiding?” On that whim, I put on Piper at the Gates of Dawn, which equally sends me so out of my mind that I decide I must break my rule about never learning band lore. I needed to know what the fuck happened to get them from Piper to The Wall.
September-November: In the two months between the onset of this and finally making another sideblog, I dedicate all of my free time to learning as much about Pink Floyd as humanely possible (and writing a 20 page essay for that narrative theory class). As you can imagine, this is a lot to unpack all at once for someone who didn’t even know who Roger or Syd or any of the rest of them were. Luckily, I am over-educated enough to be a very fast learner. Aside from the band lore itself, I of course also fall in love with the rest of Pink Floyd's discography musically-speaking. Having this interest to latch onto genuinely pulls me out of my depression.
Cut to February 2024: I am really enjoying myself, and want to keep this going as long as possible, but I am starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel on Pink Floyd lore. I decide I need to feed the fire by supplementing with lore from another band. The Beatles seem to have a strong fan presence on tumblr, why not revisit a childhood favorite? The universe laughs at my expense.
That about brings us up to date. I have gone through so much character development over the last eight months, it’s crazy. Pink Floyd is definitely one of those things that is less of a “phase” and more of a permanent part of my mindscape. Weirdly enough, since I am studying media psychology, all of this has also been really good for my career? I never took an interest in -real- media figures (as opposed to fictional characters) before, and I feel like I have a much clearer sense of things now. It's definitely influenced my research, so whatever domino effect this has on my future is bound to get even funnier.
Anyway, that’s my backstory!
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★ | * ⋆ - - - – INBOX ! * ﹡
﹡ ✧ * ☇ ( @nocentis ! )
Suddenly, the walls feel like they’re [ closing ] on him – and Jellal is suddenly much, much too aware of the GRIDS OF METAL that surround him - them.
He feels trapped.
Not by any binding, nor by any cuffs - but by an all too familiar gaze of hazel.
.
Ever since his identity had been ( accidentally ) revealed, the children’s behavior toward him changed drastically - and UNDERSTANDABLY. His disguise was one of their jailers’, but his face is the one of a friend ; ( regardless of how the years had changed it. )
And while his heart fills with fondness at the way Millianna and Sho run to hug his leg & at the awe in Erza’s eyes, it is not enough to dissipate his apprehension. Looking at his younger self has been harder ever since. Jellal knows the child has questions – can SEE IT in his body language, FEEL IT in the weight of his stare, and HEAR IT in his voice. && To these inquiries, he has no wish to answer.
But the ghosts of the past have never failed to catch up to him.
WHY WOULD THIS TIME BE ANY DIFFERENT ?
.
He gets cornered at the end of his “mission”, once the dust has settled back down. When the threat is no more, and they can all breathe a little easier.
While checking up on the wounded - taking advantage of the first aid supplies he always carries and knows are scarce within these walls -
He feels a shy tug at his cloak, and turns around to cobalt strands, a familiar marking, and a [ request to talk ].
Right there and then, he knows he cannot run from this anymore.
Alas, even though the Heavenly Body mage had started preparing, as much as he could have, for this discussion to occur - this was him, this had been him, he should know better than anyone what he could ask . . . and yet,
he still finds himself at a LOSS FOR WORDS.
" … "
What is he supposed to say ?
He swallows thickly. His tongue feels HEAVY in his mouth, burdened with the knowledge of the last decades. He knows that child is DOOMED ; from the peek he had gotten in the office, it was only a matter of weeks… days even, perhaps.
These eyes – HEAVENS, he was so small; pale skin upon frail bones, muscles built from years of labor and stolen childhood. He looks so fragile, but his eyes, despite it all, burn alight with a ferocious SPARK ; one that has not shone in his own gaze for a very, very long time.
His fingers crackle with starlight. He tastes an anger the likes of which is foreign to him – old, bygone. He feels an urge to defy the flow of time - to let the stars bring JUDGMENT upon this wretched island, sending this ATROCITY of a R-system crumbling to the ground, and take him - take them, all these poor innocent children, so so very far away from here. & yet he cannot ;
Why here ? Why now ? Why him ?
What is he doing here ?
Memories of this time are nothing more than movie sequences in his head now, decades later ; so far away, so distant. This part of him has been laid to rest alongside the WICKEDNESS of his teenage years, and both only ever come back to haunt him as a form of torture. As a result, this child was no more than an ACQUAINTANCE, a figure erased by time, wrath, grief and BLOOD.
But being there, quite literally face to face with his past - it all comes back to him. Flashes triggered by the long-gone architecture of these walls, by the stench of rot sitting heavily across the perimeter, by the crackles of electricity, the whirring of heavy machinery & the haunting sound of children sobbing a few cells further - quietly, by fear of being whipped into silence –
He now remembers being that boy. Forcing a smile every single day of his life, for the sake of the young who looked up to him. He would tell stories upon stories, wiping tears while holding his own grief tight on a leash. ( because those stories had been his brother’s, and his mother’s, and the village elder’s, && they had starred his cousin, his neighbor, the shop clerk and the fishermen – and all these people were DEAD, by now BONES buried underneath stone and charred wood and ash. )
... What was HE doing here ?
He thinks he’s struck by all five stages of grief simultaneously.The thoughts crossing his head are a blur. He feels dizzy, knees one gust of wind away from buckling.
Blaming yourself for your own weaknesses is easier when you don’t have the 11 years old version of yourself standing before you.
Looking into your eyes with – one last sliver of hope.
––– How could he ever put the blame of his anger upon him?
HE WAS A CHILD.
He was a child.
( It hits him all at once. )
.
He knows the intricacies of time travel. He knows he doesn’t remember going through this. He knows his younger self will not walk away with an answer, nor with a solution. This is Fiorean history – and it is set in stone.
That doesn’t mean he wants to LIE to him.
( Not when he’s been standing wordlessly for this long. Not when he has let silence stretch so far. Not when the tiny, fragile version of himself is catching on to what it means.
Perhaps, if he’d been quicker, it could have been an option. )
.
And so Jellal does the only thing that, amongst all the possibilities offered to him, feels undoubtedly, irrevocably right.
He closes the distance between them with a few steps and crouches down to meet himself at eye-level. Looks – really looks at him, commits every detail to memory. From the slope of his nose to the tangled, soiled strands of blue decorating from his head ; from to the fainter scars he still sports to the swirls of angry red framing his eyes, pools of sage & amber in his irises. And then he reaches out, wraps his arms around the scrawny frame and gathers him slowly, carefully, in a hug.
He hides him in the crook of his shoulder; gives him a shelter, an adult, where the hastily-built foundations of his mask of strength can crack, if he so wishes.
He lets him be a child once again.
――――― Just for a moment.
.
━━━ ━━ ━ ╸╺ . * ✰
“ is all this countless suffering for my own good? ”
.
Later on, shortly after finding his way back in the present, Jellal will ponder this further. The Heavenly Body mage will stand on a beach, amongst speckles of sand, and watch the sun gradually DISAPPEAR beyond the vast sea that once held him
[ hostage ] ― painting the sky in shades akin to the burning fire that took everything away from him.
He will think of his younger self - so far away in time, yet now so close in memory.
He will close his eyes,
push open the door to his history,
rush past the whispers and shadows crawling its walls,
and find that child still within him.
He will dig him out from the grave he was buried within, and he will give him his SIGHT - his HEARING - his TASTE - his EVERYTHING.
He will let himself feel breeze upon his skin, breathe in the smell of sea salt, taste the freedom of a boundless life.
And when his eyes open again,
he will gaze upon that landscape, && he will find it beautiful.
.
✔ ― ACCEPTING
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