#and im so glad because ive been in such a funk
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valeriianz · 1 year ago
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Retired!Dream with facial hair, inspired by @watercubebee's art here!
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Dream stared at the reflection of himself in the foggy mirror, his fingers pressing into the warm skin that was now his very human face. The pads of his fingers were soft along the strange texture of his jaw, prickly dark hairs that had begun to grow.
Dream knew what this was– facial hair, Hob had it. Dream had enjoyed the burn it left along his skin when they kissed, had curiously observed Hob when he would trim or shave it, usually with a device that buzzed so it was never too short. The human experience of maintaining and grooming had been fascinating, back then. Dream loved to observe and learn and judge, of course, why humans did the things that they did. 
Hob was always so patient with Dream, explaining why he chose to maintain his scruff, and how “... I don’t see you complaining about it,” said with a smirk and a wink. Of course Dream was a naturally curious entity, he gathered pleasure from Hob’s experiences and stories. Dream of the Endless knew everything, was well aware of the knowledge of men through their dreams alone, their fantasies and nightmares. He had been very content to observe from afar– human beings and what brought them happiness or hardship always seemed so trivial and banal. Something about Hob Gadling, his persistence, his eternal optimism, was different. It made Dream stick around when otherwise he’d grown impatient.
Hob was a fighter, an enigma, something to study under a microscope. And after hundreds and hundreds of years, Dream began to admire and wonder at the mystery that was Hob Gadling. Began to relate to his experiences, growing something substantial in the meantime, something grounding.
Hence why Dream had made the decision to become like Hob Gadling; human. 
There had been trials and tribulations (forced to make small talk with strangers, using the bathroom, brushing one’s teeth, the dreaded ordeal of going to the grocery store and searching for food). But Dream hadn’t anticipated the hair.
He did not care what he looked like, in the waking world. The discovery that his body produced testosterone and therefore, hair, was startling. Dream was a being of absolute control. He couldn’t control this.
But it was… interesting.
The stubble, as Hob liked to call it, on Dream’s face had gotten quite long in the past few days. Dream dug his fingernails (another nuisance, trimming fingernails. A waste of time) into the black bristles and scratched, tilting his chin to look down his throat, grumbling softly at the realization that the hair descended downwards as well.
A knock on the door gave Dream pause, gaze stuck on the mirror as Hob spoke, his voice muffled behind the door.
“Dream? You alright in there?”
With his eyes still roving over his face, Dream spoke up.
“Come in.”
Hob opened the door and Dream watched, out of his peripheral, as he approached.
“Looking at something nice?” Hob teased, pressing his front against Dream’s naked back and winding his arms over his waist, the towel there shifting but otherwise remaining tight around Dream’s hips.
“This is unsightly.”
Hob notched his chin over Dream’s shoulder to see what Dream saw in the reflection. He chuckled as his eyes followed the movement of Dream’s fingers on his jaw, down to his chin.
“You’re just not used to it, is all.” Hob pressed a kiss to the end of Dream’s bony shoulder. “And I happen to think it looks very fetching on you.”
Dream huffed, unconsciously leaning back in Hob’s hold, discreetly delighting in the feeling of Hob’s broad chest, covered in a thin cotton shirt, warm against his damp skin. 
“You think everything looks ‘fetching’ on me,” Dream stated matter-of-factly, causing Hob to chuckle softly, his lips traveling across Dream’s shoulder and up the side of his neck, playfully nibbling along the way.
“And I am always right.” His fingers pinched Dream’s hip bones before descending lower, forcing Dream to bite back a jolt of surprise at the tickling sensation. Especially as Hob’s hands, stark in color against Dream’s milk-white flesh, began to caress the line of hairs that had begun to grow under his belly button as well.
Dream’s breath, another anomaly that he was fascinated by, hitched audibly as Hob’s fingers dipped just a fraction below the towel wrapped around him.
“I also quite enjoy this.” Hob murmured against his skin, watching Dream in the mirror’s reflection. “I love seeing your human qualities come out. How your body responds to it.” 
Dream drops his hand to wrap around Hob’s wrist, meeting his chocolate brown eyes in the mirror as Hob takes a step to crowd Dream further against the counter, his hips slotting along Dream’s ass as he gets his clever fingers deeper, wrapping them around Dream and causing his jaw to drop in a silent cry.
Hob’s eyes flutter shut as he nuzzles his way up to Dream’s ear, bumping his nose against the coarse hairs at his jaw, biting it gently.
“Let me show you how much I love it.”
In response, Dream turns his head and captures Hob’s mouth in a burning kiss.
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A few days go by and in that time, the scruff on Dream’s face only becomes longer, individual hairs popping up as far up as his cheek bones, and Dream scowls as they even begin to curl.
“I want it off.”
Hob looks sideways at Dream in the doorway to the bathroom. “What?”
Dream stands, that attractive frown only making Hob– who’d been trimming his own beard before the interruption– slowly begin to smile.
Dream points to his face. 
Hob raises his brows as he gives Dream a once over. 
“Your scruff?” Hob clicks his tongue as Dream huffs impatiently, affirmatively. “But it really does become you.”
“I do not care for it. Remove it.”
Hob chuckles lightly, turning back to the mirror to finish up his grooming.
“Always polite,” he quips lowly, tilting his chin as he works. “Give me a mo’ and in the meantime, take a shower.”
After Dream is clean and his skin is warm to the touch, Hob has him seated in a stool he pulled from the kitchen, keeping a warm towel around his face while Hob gathers his equipment.
Dream watches silently, his eyes tracking Hob’s movement before finally meeting his gaze as Hob drapes another small towel over Dream’s shoulder.
He removes the towel from Dream’s face and stares at him, causing Dream to raise a brow.
“What?”
Hob sighs, bringing both of his hands, cool from a fresh wash, around Dream’s face, thumbs stroking his cheeks.
“Just saying goodbye.”
Dream is unable to stop himself from rolling his eyes, another human trait that he’d been having a hard time tamping down.
“Perhaps once I am ‘used to it,’ as you say, I may consider growing it out again.”
Hob’s eyes seem to sparkle with excitement.
“Yeah?” At Dream’s nod, Hob gives his cheeks a brief squish, making the skin bunch up around Dream’s mouth and his frown deepen.
Hob laughs softly, the crinkles around his eyes deepening, striking Dream down and reminding him why he loved Hob so much. The laugh lines on his face, centuries of smiles and laughter etched onto his skin forever. A trait that made Dream himself smile more, enamored by the history there, in not just Hob’s laugh lines, but the wrinkles of his brow too. Years of hurt and frustration carved deep enough to leave memories that Dream could trace with his fingers, his lips. The stories Hob’s skin alone could tell made Dream want to trace constellations upon it.
Hob leaned forward and kissed the tip of Dream’s nose, breaking him out of his stupor. “I look forward to it.”
Dream had to admit, as Hob prepared him for his shave, that he quite enjoyed being pampered. 
Hob had lathered a thick cream upon Dream’s cheeks, mouth, and neck with a horse hair brush, his eyes gone serious, gaze studious as he worked and Dream once again, could do nothing but watch, sitting still as Hob took up a blade and began carefully stroking it down the side of Dream’s face.
“A straight razor,” Hob spoke eventually, his voice quiet, hot breath puffing against Dream’s ear. “Is my favorite for a close shave.” He swipes the blade on the towel resting on Dream’s shoulder, cleaning it before going back in with short, sharp strokes.
“Never goes out of style…” Hob murmurs, his free hand pulling slightly on Dream’s skin to keep it taut. “Also doubles as a weapon, eh?”
He gives Dream a cheeky grin.
“Have you slit many throats using a straight razor, Hob Gading?” Dream makes sure to speak once the blade is safely away from his skin.
Hob hums, going back to Dream’s jaw, going with the grain of Dream’s hair.
“Sweeney Todd style?” Hob pulls back to give Dream a look. “Can’t say I have. Though, in other instances…” he trails off, not finishing his sentence, leaving Dream to guess the answer.
They are silent for a long while after that, the only sounds filling the air being the grazing of the blade against coarse hairs and Dream’s own breathing. It tickles Dream’s ears, the gentle vibrations of the blade, and he continues to study Hob to distract himself from the sensation.
There is an intimacy here that isn’t lost on Dream. The trust he places in Hob’s very capable hands. Hands that have seen violence, committed crimes most egregious. Hands that were calloused over from physical labor and then softened by wielding a pen. Dream was fascinated, watching how Hob’s fingers held the blade, sure and confident, bringing it down swiftly, a tame version of a sword. 
All while performing something so… domestic. These hands had also healed and loved, touched Dream with such reverence, held him with gentle astonishment, as Hob admitted freely how lucky he was to have Dream in his life. Making love to him slow and deep, but also hard and brutal, fingers interlocked with Dream’s and holding him in place, keeping that connection. 
And in this moment, with Hob’s hands touching him fastidiously, attention focused solely on him, Dream felt relaxed and safe, enjoying the experience more than he’d ever admit.
It was over far too soon, Hob taking up the towel to wipe off any remaining shave cream and instructing Dream to rinse his face with cold water.
Once dry, Hob massaged an after shave balm into Dream’s skin, catching his eyes and smiling almost shyly.
“You were very distracting, you know.” Hob says, pulling Dream to standing. “Watching me the whole blessed time.”
Dream’s head tilted a fraction as he brought a hand up to feel his smooth skin.
“I like watching you work.”
Hob huffed, his smile widening as he playfully tugged Dream’s hair.
“Go on, take a look,” he gestured behind Dream to the mirror.
Dream obliged, sweeping his gaze over the smooth skin he had been used to wearing his entire existence and hummed in approval.
“Next time,” Hob said, tossing the towel in the hamper. “I’ll properly show you how to shave, so you can do it yourself whenever you’d like.”
Dream hummed, contemplating.
“Or you could always do it.”
“Oh?” Hob chuckled, turning Dream around and getting his arms around his hips. “Figures a king would overindulge in my humble services.”
“And you indulge me so well,” Dream crooned in a low voice, feeling his lips curl in an unconscious smirk that always caught Hob off guard. It was his favorite thing to do, if Dream was being honest, causing Hob to hesitate and laugh.
“I think I’m just whipped.”
Dream nodded with a considerate hum, leaning forward to brush his lips against Hob’s.
“Good.”
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the-s1lly-corner · 1 year ago
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Jax x reader thats like the mayor from the nightmare before christmas?
What i mean is the reader has a normal face on the front of her head, and a sad clown like face on the back.
Reader is normally happy, but when something bad happens their head does a 180 and they're all worried and paranoid
Jax x two face!reader !
gosh no because that one ena ask gave me a very similar idea for this and now i got an oc idea so uh!!! idk, maybe ill draw something for that idea, maybe not. likely not, ive been in a weird art funk the past few days enjoy!
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imma say this right now before i forget but i feel like jax would try to spin your head around to look at both sides. please get this man a fidget toy im literally begging you, anytime i mention a reader that has a part of them/piece of clothing that can be somehow turned into a fidget thing i throw my jax hc at it
got thrown off the first time you switches faces, assuming the face isnt visible from the back; but if it is he has probably talked to the wrong face at least once
but thats just a general hc for everyone, i dont think just jax would slip up like that^^
tries to at least be a little nice to you when your sad face rears its head in, usually though hes bad at comforting so he probably tries to deal with whatever is causing the issue instead. i believe in jax being a not very good comforter; this man does not know what to say and probably very awkwardly pats your shoulder. youre gonna have to let him know what you need from him if either of you expect the relationship to work
sure, your normal face is capable of showing most... neutral and positive expressions, but something about seeing a smile on you hits something in him, especially after a period of you being stuck with the sadder counterpart
he has to fight himself from saying something that could be taken as mean when he expresses that hes glad youre feeling better
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itsyagurlchip · 8 months ago
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today i'm gonna post all of my recent works- I hope you guys love it! because you all deserve it.
im not gonna say i did my best on all of these, but this is the most ive made in a little over a month. (I started this around feb 27th) and im super proud of myself!
ive had this funk around my mind for a LONG time, until the people around me started to push me out of it.
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and that includes you guys as well! Im so glad to have met you all, happy 80+ followers!!!
the posts after these are gonna be queued, around 3-5pm CT, and they are filled with my preferences on headcannons and oneshots, just so you can get to know me a little better.
in them you'll find some fictional characters i'd really love to be in a relationship with, loose drafts, some inclusive things ive never written before, and overall diversity compared to the things i've written before. some may have a sprinkle of my personality, others with a handful of my culture. it doesnt matter! read to your heart's content.
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if the reader doesnt relate to you at all- oh well. not trying to be mean or anything- but these are my preferences. These are things that I want to see. if you want something more, please request it.
and yes I do understand the difference between cannon and head cannon (I think about it all the time!) so therefore, some things may not make sense. unless there's context ig.
speaking of- i need more reqs TT-TT (sorry for asking, ive just been getting a lil drought recently)
back to it- you may also see the occasional digital art, depending on what's gonna happen. (im currently writing this on march 1st) and i'll finish it off with some new playlists ive been brewing up for a minute!
i may also need someone to remind me to add the links to the masterlist, as well as VGL💜. If someone could do that I will be eternally grateful
and thats it!
a few things I recommend while reading:
1) I know this sounds super specific, but my works were made with canary, but they all look better in goth rave (you can change the colors when you press dashboard on the pull out menu) 2) have an open mind! while I don't know much, or haven't researched, let me know if some of the things I describe are inaccurate. (this also includes grammar and typos!) 3) have a lil snakie snack. those who don't drink water aren't welcome past this point 😡✋🏾✋🏾
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i just want to show you my appreciation for you all, and what better way to do it than doing what i started this blog for?
have a wonderful day my twizzies
(yes that is what im calling you all now, cope.)
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(๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و tags: @kittykittyanon @radicallxser @oleander-nin @towomatos @thealphagirl @ziipzeepzop-eez @amorvincitomnia-14 @spongejuice. if you would like to be added, check my blog.
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tojisun · 5 months ago
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ive missed so many games, IM SORRY SUNSUN!!! I HAVE TO CATCH UP! ive been in a funk; only able to read, not yap. which makes me sad! i miss u cutie, but ill be yappin to u soon !!!!! i love you always🩷
omg love dont u worry about a thing!! im just glad to be talking to u :'> i missed u so so much and i hope u are doing well!! and pls, i cant wait for our yap sesh teehee <33
i love you always kai my star!!
hockey ramble (a long winded break down of the finals so far, from an oilers fan) under the cut so pls feel free to ignore again heheh
so the oilers win western conference and headed to finals, facing off with the panthers.
games one and two were played in the home ice of the panthers because during the regular seasons, after tallying each team's wins, the panthers had more wins than the oilers (104 EDM - 110 FLA)
the finals started really badly for the oilers. game one was a shutout (0 EDM - 3 FLA), game two wasn't any better (1 EDM - 4 FLA). game three saw oilers managing to shave the score difference to one point but they ended up losing too (3 EDM - 4 FLA). these three consecutive wins for the panthers means that they only need one more game to win the cup.
and then game four happened.
this was played in the edmonton home rink (so was game three), and because it was the final game that the panthers needed to win to get the cup, it was riddled with anxiety.
oilers scored first.
scoring first is necessary for shifting the momentum, but it was not a goal that really settled our nerves because game two started that way too, with the oilers scoring first only for the rest of their shots to be blocked by the great wall that bobrovsky (panthers' goaltender) makes.
but then they scored another one, and another one, and ended the first period with a two point lead (3 EDM - 1 FLA), with one of their goals this period made during the panthers' power play.
it was exhilarating. the flicker of hope grew and it turned into a whole blaze.
period two saw more beautiful progress for the oilers, with their captain and forward, and arguably the very heart of the team, connor mcdavid finally scoring his first goal in the finals of the playoffs.
not soon after, davo matched his goal with an assist to nurse, bringing up the score difference between the oilers and the panthers to four. it is by then that the panthers pulled their starting goaltender out, bobby, and subbed in stolarz who made his "first career playoff appearance" in this game.
stolarz struggled too, and, in the end, facing the spectacular plays made by the oilers, game four was snagged from a panthers sweep and extended the oilers' season. it was a tremendous victory (8 EDM - 1 FLA). historical, even.
non-fans called it a fluke, saying that the panthers just wanted to win the cup in home ice, while fans saw this as oilers finally waking up and playing how they usually do.
game five was played back in the panthers home ice. again, one more win for the panthers and they would be the cup winners, so tensions continue to mount and peak.
davo, in an interview, said that they will win this game and "drag them back to alberta." (talking about game 6).
dude, i can't even begin to explain how monumental yesterday's game was, but drag it back home they did. i'm still reeling over the final score so i'm still incoherent and pretty much in disbelief so do forgive me. but:
stuart skinner, the man he is.
i forgot which commentary youtuber said it but this is how they described skinner: he is average at best, especially against bobrovsky, but he is volatile. he is a beast when he gets in his groove. unshakable.
we saw that skinner yesterday. in a sport where goaltending amounts to the final score, stuart skinner made impossible saves yesterday. yes, it's not a shutout and yes, the panthers scored three goals more than comfortable, but the saves that skinner made were the tight and hard-hitting ones.
the momentum he carved out for the team in period one was kept consistent throughout the game.
connor brown and his shortie - a goal made during a panthers power play. it was the first goal of yesterday's game, during a crucial moment, and shot after an impossibly terrific of a pass from janmark.
connor mcdavid.
i may sound too biased but you have to understand where i'm coming from. davo is the best NHL player of this decade, and this sentiment is very much founded.
he has so many highlight moments from yesterday's game, but three of the monumental ones for me are: his second goal, his assist to perry's goal, and his clutch goal during the third period with only about less than twenty seconds left in the clock.
tkachuck was able to save the initial empty-netter goal. it was a tremendous save and cinematic, to be honest. he hooked the puck with his stick and used his full body to fling it out. he ended up caught in the net - cue the memes - but davo skated after the puck, took control of it, and amidst cheers for tkachuk's miracle save, he sent it back in the net, ending the game with a two point lead for the oilers (5 EDM - 3 FLA).
it was SOMETHING.
everyone knew it then - game five was a historical play.
and it was: the oilers are the "first team in a stanley cup final to win a game 5 on the road after trailing 3-0."
.
.
im sorry for the hockey rant, its just that. what started as a passing interest for the team that beat my team (canucks) turned into a full-blown love because how can you not???
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dreamsndmadness · 7 months ago
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hellooo!!!(sorry in advance for all of the rambling)
first of all, im absolutely gushing from all of the soft moments in ch9: feyd nearly crying from being cared for, paul helping feyd with his nightmares, and feyd being protective/caring in both the breakfast scene and throughout the spice field inspections :333. It was all VERY adorable and paul finally being unhesitating about his sexual relationship with feyd and them communicating (both implicitly with paul reading feyds body language and explicitly with paul making feyd ask for what he wants), it's all very rewarding in general :)
Also, ive just been thinking nonstop about all the stuff going on with paul. so, my first theory about pauls exhaustion was because he was staying up because of feyds nightmares waking up but then i re-read it and saw paul was tired even before they shared a bed, and then i remembered that lack of sleep is a common symptom of pregnancy so thats my leading theory rn, that OR paul is staying up late reading lol. im also so interested in what paul and lady jessica are plotting, they mentioned controlling feyd and learning more about him in the beginning and then theres the date palm scene. I remember in the movies that date palms are definitely on arrakis so my first thought was that feyd was being a paranoid little freak about it but then i thought lady jessica might be trying to assess pauls health or something?? its safe to say im super hyped for the paul POV
sorry about the length and INCREDIBLY half formed theories
( •̀ - •́ ) ₊˚⊹ ᰔ
The wonderful bowl100!!
I love your questions ☺️. Omg yay!!! I’m so glad you liked the chapter. I always have a crisis of confidence when I post new chapters 🙃. Yesss. The softness. Feyd cutting the fruit and making sure Paul eats was one of my favorite moments from the chapter. It’s so hard to write moments of tenderness from him without it seeming out of character. And then he can never be honest with himself about why he’s doing things or why certain things are making him feel certain ways. Man. This guy. Feyd used his words FINALLY!!! And yes!! I’m so happy for Paul. Starting to enjoy himself. It’s so important.
Okee so here’s what I can say. You aren’t wrong about any of your guesses per say. It’s been such a joy to write from Paul’s pov because he’s a much more emotionally evolved person so I can write him being like “ah yes. This is making me feel this way!”. So one of the biggest reasons for Paul’s exhaustion is that he has been having dreams. Some of them good, some of them pretty disturbing. And yes, we will be seeing them in the next chapter. He is also (not really a spoiler cause it’s in the tags) pregnant! Another big reason! That’s going to be a plot point of the next chapter as well.
Lol the date palm scene!! You’re right on both counts. Feyd is being a paranoid little freak. He’s like “they are speaking in code!!” No you weirdo, they are talking about date palms. However, I am going to give him a little credit because he did pick up on the weird energy of the scene which is basically due to Jessica trying to draw Paul out of his funk. She’s worried about him and thinks he’s not doing well, and she’s trying to cheer him up and also trying to subtly (probably too subtly) signal to Feyd to do the same. Which he kinda gets! Cause he then invites Paul to come with him on inspection and Jessica is like “thank fucking god you are so fucking dense”. To Feyd. Not Paul. Paul can do no wrong in Jessica’s eyes lol.
Anyway! All of your theories were pretty spot on and perceptive!!! Sorry it took so long for me to respond 😔. I’ve been sick this week and it’s been a struggle. I have most of Paul’s chapter finished (it’s sitting at 5,500 words right now 😀). And I hope to edit and post tomorrow!!
Thank you as always for your lovely questions. I look at your wonderful art every day 🥹.
All the best 🫶.
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youremyheaven · 2 months ago
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I MISSED YOU TOO <3333
ive never done any substances (never plan to. i don’t even want to touch cigarettes or alcohol because of past abuse with people who had a bad relationship with such things which was taken out on me instead) BUT one thing about depression that i cant find anyone talking about it how disoriented i am??
im alone these days so i blank at times just sitting on the floor and suddenly its 3 hours later, or i keep sleeping at 4-5am because ive had consecutive nightmares (even during naptimes) and so my sense of time is really really messed up
i still think its the start of september and the worst part is that im not even doing anything, im just blank, but sometimes im sobbing, sometimes im just tired but unable to sleep yk? youre so relatable about the cloudy part too because i still feel like im just in a daze
my last 1h year was actually horrid though. i never thought anyone else experienced it that way but mine was ☺️☺️ not the best. probably the worst year of my life LOLLL
I DID ASSUME YOU WERE A 12HOUSER but i always did just assume that you would have some significant pisces energy somewhere because of general vibes + the life experiences you talked about
the way i’m a 6th houser but im so stuck in spirituality all the time 😭😭 ive been disoriented this entire month but its also bc ive been doing spiritual stuff that kinda results in the detatchment from this 3D body yk? so when i snap back here its just off and weird but its so cool that we are kinda mirroring each other
AND I LOVE LOVE LOVE your analogy about emptiness meaning more space to grow like YES youre so right— i may tjink i have nothing coming up or building up for me rn but that just means more space to create new things i like right?? such a clever and cute way to think about things
- mother anon (an angel that is in the process of sewing on new wings)
"ive never done any substances (never plan to. i don’t even want to touch cigarettes or alcohol because of past abuse with people who had a bad relationship with such things which was taken out on me instead) BUT one thing about depression that i cant find anyone talking about it how disoriented i am??"
GIRLL. first of all, im proud of u for having such a strong stance against substances and i hope it stays that way<3
i was dissociating pretty heavily the last few months and the brain fog took over me completely so i feel u on the disoriented bit. depression manifests differently in different individuals. being angry, taking it out on others, being easily irritable, being unable to enjoy yourself, having no motivation to get anything done etc are all symptoms. ppl always have a black & white image of someone crying all day and while that can be a part of it. depression is a range of behaviours and long term depression often makes it very disorienting to process events and time. you feel disconnected. literally.
"im alone these days so i blank at times just sitting on the floor and suddenly its 3 hours later, or i keep sleeping at 4-5am because ive had consecutive nightmares (even during naptimes) and so my sense of time is really really messed up"
living alone is REALLYYY hard if you're depressed. whatever you just said describes me under the influence of substances. i hope you can spend time with a community bc the key to tackling depression is just getting out of that funk into a new routine that allows you to constructively spend your time and give you a daily sense of purpose.
im sorry u had a bad 1h year :((( i hope it was character defining at least and helped u learn and grow!! we mould ourselves into our highest versions thru our difficulties <3
mother knows best!!! u detected the 12h vibes and u were RIGHT!!
lmaoooo u getting spiritual and detaching from reality and me getting baked out of my mind and detaching from reality is soooo funny!!! at least we both let go!! imagine being attached 🤢🤢🤮🤮🤢EWW lol
im glad u like it!! im empty but i have soooo much room in my heart for all the blessings yet to come!! <33 and SO DO U MAMA <333
may u sew dem wings on and reach places u never could have before!!! u are soooo loved and u will get soooo much better, just hang in there!!! we're all with u<33
love always,
heaven
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oonajaeadira · 1 year ago
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i've been excited for LOYW ever since you first mentioned the concept, and now seeing that snippet and you saying it helped with your writers block!?!? I DIDNT THINK I COULD BE EVEN MORE EXCITED
im so glad youre enjoying the concept and that youre looking forward to writing it, my favourite fanfics/fanworks are always the ones the author/creator had a fun time writing
ive basically read your entire masterlist and every character youve written for has never ever felt ooc, so knowing that one of my fave fanfic writers is doing this concept with mr.joel miller himself????? I AM SO SO EXCITED FOR THIS AHKSHFLGKLFJFL
Hello, friend.
I need you to know what a really really wonderful message this is. I don't know how to tell you how wonderful it is, but you need to know that it really really is. And how I needed to horde it for a little while.
I have been in a FUNK lately. My brain's been absolutely RUDE.
But.
I'm absolutely melted by this. I love that you love my stories. My whole masterlist? You mean my whole heart. That you have. In your hands. You beauty. This means so much to me...that you trust me with Joel, that you WANT me to write for him...you're excited even.
Excited.
(Are you still excited when I tell you I've written 6.3K of Spring already and it's not near being done yet? And that's just the first of four chapters? This is more of a beast than I'd planned...)
But I am having fun. Tremendous fun, really. I just made Joel hold a lamb because I wanted him to. He's going to take compliments and hospitality and enjoy it, dammit. And I am going to pry his rusted knuckles open and show him that letting Ellie go doesn't mean she'll run away. I'm opening him up like a tin can, but easy and slow and gentle...just like he likes it.
This one's just gonna take a little longer and that's all there is to it.
But knowing you're just as excited as I am for it? That's worth fighting for.
Thank you, one million million. <3
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storiesofsvu · 2 years ago
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Hey hey, another Thursday!
Starting off with OC, ive seen the promo pics and tbh, im excited.
Jet looking amazing in green.
That was the WOOORST job putting a necklace on EVER. Like, not only was it over the hair, but it was not properly lined up for the reveal…
Just casually walking around the streets of nyc with a severed hand.. nbd
Are you seriously telling me that dog devoured that hand in that little time, bones and all?
How and why is it that these hardened career criminals always fall so fucking hard and fast for the UC cop!?? Like, you should have your guard up a little bit shouldn’t you??
Okay, so…. Can we talk about ayanna’s nails for a hot second? She clearly a pillow princess with those claws… LOL
 THANK YOU JET. THANK YOU for fucking calling out that stabler has done SO much worse than KISS someone while UC.
Man this whole sending an agent cop into the field UC to be the romantic interest of a perp/mob/mafia and the cop ends up crossing a line or two, fucking things up and falling for said perp… all while the guy playing Doyle is the main mob boss?? Hmm… this is a little too familiar, like even jet’s wig…
Is she faking this?? Okay, yes, she is. Called that.
This ep is super Ayanna jet heavy and im LOVING it thank fucking god
Also loving ayanna’s apt
Okay the wig coming off would not be that big of a deal in today’s day and age, tons of girls wear wigs all the fucking time. ALSO, why was it not wigcapped, pinned down and secured??
Welp. Cant say im not surprised by the ending. But I am glad that jet’s getting to do more.
As of right now I am paying ZERO attention to mothership. We’ll see if that changes when sam pops up or not.
Okay, the black & tan number Samantha has on close to the end? It looks like it’s a two piece outfit with her midriff hanging out… good job wardrobe…
Ooo..od’d… yeah… called that…, also Nolan that was some of the worst cpr compressions ive ever seen on tv.. cmon
OKAY. Paying attention now!
We REALLY had to watch that machete attack again!?? WHY
Jfc that opening…did we have to go that graphic?? Is this gonna continue to be a new thing?
I cant figure out if they’re trying to test out muncy/Velasco with the fandom and see what way we go, or of they’re teasing the relationship, or if they’re just playing on the brother/sister vibes, because all im getting is muncy being a brat, which is accurate. Also that scene would’ve been a lot less awkward if there was any kind of background noises/music, like when there’s elevator dings on grey’s, you know what im saying?
Loving the purple on Velasco tho
“you wanna keep a stray puppy?” “you got to keep one!” LOL
So bruno’s here to stay?
#1: wtf is this bucket hat.
#2: why is it pulled down so far over her eyes?
Bro those crutches are way too short for this dude
“A funk?” carisi then gives the “who’s this guy” look to liv. LOL.
Man the writing this ep is great.
I appreciate that we’re getting more into muncy’s personality aside from being a lil teasing brat, like, there’s gotta be a lot of grief in there, knowing that her mom died and im pretty sure it was when grace was young, so she’s probably been bottling shit up since then. Also still and always really hoping that they don’t push her & Velasco, let the brother sister bestie vibes win please.
Glad we’re getting lots of muncy this week
Bruno is growing on me….
“sometimes though it’s hard to make a u-turn” IS THAT THE ONLY FOLLOW UP WERE GONNA GET?! (I say that as someone who is 100000000% NOT an eo shipper, but I do think it’s strange that *that* happened last week and like, fin didn’t even ask how noah’s drive back to the city was kinda thing. Yeah, sure there was enough going on in both episodes, but like, there was literally ZERO follow up to everything. Jeeze.)
 Joe looking hella cute in that toque
Man this just keeps getting worse…
Okay… hold up.. grace says “a great one” about Velasco being a liar and liv just flies right passed it AS IF THEY ALL DIDN’T FIRST MEET HIM WHEN HE WAS UC AND NONE OF THEM BELIEVED HIM. Like homeboy WAS working majorly UC for how long??
Though we DO know a tidbit about his previous gang involvement… so I honestly don’t know what direction theyre taking this… it’ll be interesting to see.
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kaz11283 · 4 years ago
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Of Course I'm Here
Characters: Come on you know by now how this goes (Loki x you) (Team x you, platonic)
Warnings: None. And really if you ever see anything that I might need to able as a warning please let me know... I'm the person who forgets there are people out there that get offened by the word F*** if that is an exapmle of anything.
Summary: Mid battle and the avengers keep looking for an answer as to why the God of Lies hasnt showed up yet. Of course you have no idea but at least he proves them all wrong.
ANNOUNCEMENT TIME: hey guys Im back, I know it hasnt been long but I also know I havent been posting every single day like I was, i got into a weird little funk where I didnt want to do anything, I was just feeling completly drained, and I felt bad because I have my little and I didnt even want to play with her because I have just been so TIRED, but I'm feeling better. Work has been kicking my ass here lately and ive been working over 50 hours a week so ive literally been coming in, eatting / feeding the little, getting us ready for bed, and crashing as soon as she falls asleep. But im here now. I will probably be more active on weekends than during the week because I have more time to spend working on stuff but I will be posting also during the week just not daily. At least until after state comes. Thank you so much for the reblogs, likes, comments, follows, and messages please keep them coming! If you would like to be tagged please ask or message, and requests are open. Love you guys so much! 💚💚💚💚💚
Loki Masterlist
~~~~~
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"Y/N, BACK UP I NEED BACK UP! EYES IN THE SKY!" Tony yelled from above, you and Clint stood back to back on a roof top shooting as many bad guys as you could. Clint took aim at another carrier, shooting at the engine causing the entire thing to blow up raining debris and hot metal around you.
"Damnit Clint! Farther away make sure they are farther away!" You yelled popping him on the head with an arrow before aiming it at the thing that was chasing Tony.
"Where is lover boy at? You.sent him the location right?" Nat asked into the com.
"Yes I sent him the location, no I dont know where hes at." You mocked.
"Did you send him the right location?" Sam asked.
"One time, one dam-"
"Language!" Steve chimed in causing everyone to groan. Gun shots where ringing all around you and you could here metal on metal paired with Hulk screams coming from another building over.
"Language." You mocked muting your com son that no one but Clint heard you. "I am a 26 year old woman, I think I'm old enough to cuss if I want." You drew back your bow and sent another arrow flying into another goon that had Nat trapped aginst a wall. She shot you a thumbs up before running off. You hit unmute on your com.
"Jesus, 26? Baby, you sure you don't need to be at a babysitter instead of on a building killing things?" He laughed.
"Dont worry Hawk, when we get done here I've already booked you a nice nursing home to be put into." You put your bow around you and stood on the edge of the building. "I need a better view." You looked round, the top of a taller building caught you eye. "There Hawk, we can cover a better radius from up there, get closer to the action."
"DOES ANYONE KNOW WHEN THE GODS ARE GOING TO BE HERE? WE NEED MORE HELP WERE GETTING TIRED AND OUT NUMBERED!" Tony came over the coms screaming.
"How do we get up there? Or do I even wanna know?" Hawk came to examin where you were talking about.
"Im jumping, you cant tell me that someone wont catch me." You shrug.
"GODS WHERE ARE TH- Y/N DONT YOU DARE JUMP!" Tony stopped and hovered right were you was standing.
"Then take us over there. We need higher ground, we cant cover everyone from down here." You crossed your arms.
"Where are the gods at y/n?" He asked again
"I. Dont. Know. Jesus you guys act like I'm suppose to be there keeper!" A simultaneous you are came from everone through the com causing you to roll your eyes. "Hes gonna be here I swear it! Now take me to the building or I jump. 1.....2....-" Tony grabbed you by the collar of your jacket and flew you to the building.
God these things were everywhere and you were starting to run out of arrows. After shooting another ship and causing it to blow you heard what was unmistakably pounding on the roof top door leading to where you currently was at.
"I have some univited guests about to join my party. Anyone available for some assistance?" You yanked out the two emerald green and silver daggars that your boyfriend had given you not long after you had started dating after throwing your bow around you.
"Buy some time kid, I'm on ground level right now but I can try to get up there as fast as possible." Bucky called over the com.
"Buy some time? Ok. I can do this. I work better from afar but a little hand to hand never hurt anyone, just easier to get stabbed this way." The first of the things busted through the door running straight at you. You jerked out of the way missing his staff by just a few inches. Quickly turning you flipped the dagger like Loki had showed you and stabbed him in his side causing him to fall to the ground before the next one tried to impale you.
"I have two daggers and they have freaking staffs! Back up! WHERE THE HELL AR-" you were interupted by static in the air and a bright light. The bitfrost had just opened up leaving to gods standing in front of you and taking out the remainder ofnthe bad guys. "HES HERE! I TOLD YOU GUYS THEY WERE COMING AND THEY'RE HERE." You pulled two extra coms from you pocket and gave them to Thor and Loki.
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"Always a pleasure to battle beside you Lady y/n." Thor smiled takkng the com and putting it in his ear before taking off again.
Loki sauntered over to you and put his arm around you waist, you put the com in his ear as he rolled his eyes. He leaned down and gave you a quick kiss.
"You got a new outfit." You smiled at him. God the way he looked in his battle clothe always did something to you, the horned helment was a plus.
"You like it." He smirked down at you pulling you closer.
"Your wearing your horns to." You reached up and brushed a peice if hair behind his ear.
"STOP. STOP NOW. WE CAN HEAR EVERYTHING AND ITS GROSS." Tony yelled causing you both to roll your eyes.
"Quick run down, bad guys everywhere, no end in sight, and I'm out of arrows pretty sure Hawk is too." Loki waved his hand over your quiver making more arrows appear.
"I see you had to use your daggers. I am sorry for not being here. Are you hurt anywhere?" He asked stepping away from you to examin you.
"Small cut on the side, nothing I havent dealt with before, Ill be fine. You go make sure Hawk is fully stocked up and help the others. I got a birds eye view of you right here." I leaned in kissing him one more time before smiling at him and pushing him away. He kissed his two finger before placimg them over his heart and you did the same, "always." You both said before he disappered.
You could hear Thor laughing at the chaos going on and Steve trying to direct the god of thunder on what to do. You had learned earlier to just let him do his own thing and he would be fine. Tony was still trying to micromanage everything when you heard Loki mumble something in an old language and his com cut out. You had figured it wouldnt have stayed on to long though but at least you had tried. It had calmed down up on your end so you decided to finally go back down to where Clint was at shooting an arrow with heavy duty rope you glided back down next to him to watch what was going on.
"Hello, earth to y/n." He snapped his fingers in front of your face. You had been to busy staring at Loki and that damn helmet. "I dont even understand why were friends." He rolled his eyes propping up on the ledge watching as the rest of the team secured the last of the bad guys.
"Because we both shoot arrows, because we are both the best in the team, or because we both know we are the best looking one on the team so we have to stick together." You laughed jumping up so you could sit on the ledge.
"The birds can come out of their nest now." Bucky called over the coms causing you both to sigh.
When you and Clint had reached the bottom you walked over to Thor theowing your arms around the big goof ball.
"You are amazing during battle as always." He beemed patting you on the shoulder.
"As always? Thor youve only fought with her twice." Steve said beside you.
"I had a week off. Went to Asguard, spent time with the boys. Someone had to keep them in line." You shrugged like it was no big deal.
"She was amazing!" Thor went on telling the story of the fight you had all gotten into.
"Mothers been asking about you by the way dear. Wants to know if you've decided to come stay for a while." Loki leaned down and whispered in your ear.
"I think I'm leaning toward a yes. I can't stand being away from you, you had been gone forever this time." You reached for his hand as you both walked to the quinjet.
"I was making arrangements to have our room redone. I figured you would come with me." He gave you a knowing smirk as he reached up to take off his helmet.
"Leave the horns on. I have a suprise for you when we get home." You pulled his hand away from his head and smacked his butt.
"You are a little minx." He laughed chasing you into the jet while the rest of the team groaned and rolled their eyes.
"Even if you wasnt moving i would be kicking your ass out! I am so sick of the PDA between you two." Tony hollared after you.
"Leave them alone Tony, they are courting. Im just glad my brother is happy and not trying to stab me." Thor clapped Tony on the back.
~~~~~
Tag List:
@kgirardin
@sophlubbwriting
@supbeeches
@high-functioning-lokipath
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turboemmy · 3 years ago
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hii first id like to say thank u for making such cute and bouncy art, ive been in kind of a funk lately and your art has genuinely cheered me up a lil with how colourful & just generally sweet n positive it is!! if u don't mind me askin, i rly dig that grainy papery texture you sometimes use, is there a certain texture pack etc you got it from or are there any similar looking ones you'd recommend? :o
oh thank you so so much!!!! I love making everything round and squishy hehe, and i looove bright colors. Im so glad theyre well liked !! 🥺💕 i hope you get outta your lil funk soon! Ive been there before too and ik its not easy !! 😔
As for the textures tho, yes i do use like a texture pack!! I specifically buy off creative market, its really got a bunch of nice assets for artists by artists that is very great! The ones i love to specifically use are here and they have cardboard textures that are similar to like. Chipboards ! :-)
I also use film grain overlays too, those are very nice. I totally recommend signing up for emails on there because most mondays they have 5 free things you can get. Sometimes you find a cute font, or sometimes a small texture pack! But yeah! I love using the cardboard pack most. 🥰
I hope it helps!! Its a lot of fun to play with overlays and stuff or noise filters !!!
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minorityblogs · 3 years ago
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GONE
ive been gone a while. maybe its because ive been booked with my last semester ever. im a little nervous but im glad its almost over. 
Ive been struggling with my self. ive been in this funk. like im doing okay but my mind wants to go back to the old bad self me while im trying to go back to how i was before my reckless phase. 
im sad things wont ever be the same, but i also need to move on and stop making excuses for myself. 
Maybe I need to reach out again. UGH self accountability sucks. and so does emotional awareness 
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everyone shut the fuck up and CONSIDER trans girl iida
she supposes she always knew unconsciously that there was something different about her but she never rlly put much thought into it until some ppl in the class come out as trans* (like aoyama’s genderfluid, tokoyami’s a demiboy, nd tsu and jirou are trans girls)
and as class rep, but also (and arguably more importantly) their friends, iida wants to make sure she can make them as comfortable as possible abt coming out so she does some research nd stuff. like she knew trans people existed and were valid nd such before but she wanted to get more than just the basic facts
and shes happy for her friends! shes glad they trusted their class enough to tell them, shes glad she can be there for them. but she also notices that she feels rlly...weird? and she keeps doing research just because.......its interesting. but she doesnt know why she finds it so interesting?? and she gets kinda insecure abt that
so she keeps diggin into it and reads posts that trans ppl have made abt their experiences and just classic shitposts nd all that. she thinks the community is great!! and also she finds some fresh wholesome memes to share w her friends so its all the better. right?
but eventually she finds a community of trans girls specifically and she just absolutely COMBS through that. reads every single post there that she can find. but coincidentally she also feels even more insecure now bc shes starting to unconsciously question her gender nd stuff and lets be real folks. an identity crisis is not fun
couple this with the fact that she doesnt experience the traditional dysphoria(tm) that other trans girls seem to universally share, iida gets rlly down abt it. nd it gets to the point she rlly raaaaags on herself for still lookin thro these posts nd stuff and still subtly questioning herself and shes just rlly unhappy at the time :[
nd she doesnt wanna like make tsu or jirou uncomfortable so she doesnt wanna ask them abt it but shes so confused nd frankly hurt and she doesnt know what going oooonnnn with herself
so shes just in this complete funk for a while nd it starts to affect her grades and performance in training. her friends know smths up but iida doesnt know how to even explain how shes feeling so its not necessarily that she doesnt WANT to go to her friends but she literally does not know how to. anyway eventually aizawa keeps her after class and is like “ok iida smths up im gonna call tensei if u dont talk to me”
iida feels absolute HORROR at the prospect of tensei somehow finding out abt this bc oh shit what if he doesnt want her carrying on the name of ingenium anymore??? what if he thinks shes a freak??? what if he thinks shes not really a girl and shes just faking it to be special?? what if- and oh shit thats the first time iida rlly consciously thought to herself “im a girl but what if others dont think i am?”
so she kinda bursts into tears and aizawa internally is like “oh jesus what the fuck” but externally hes like “iida?? r u ok?? was it something i said?? oh fuu- is something wrong with tensei??” and iida just kinda speaks thro her cries like “no nothings wrong with tensei something’s wrong with me” and ill be real folks its real sad girl hours for a bit
anyway iida doesnt rlly elaborate much beyond that bc shes so ashamed and embarrassed but aizawa is like “u’ve gotta talk to someone iida ur friends r worried and frankly i am as well” and iida eventually promises to talk to someone
soo she comes to terms that since she so confused it would be best to ask tsu and jirou abt it even if shes,,,,so v concerned,,,abt making them uncomfortable. but she manages to convince herself that she rlly does need some guidance here and better to ask ppl who know her than ask on the internet sooo
thankfully while iida is working up the courage to ask tsu and jirou to talk, she finds posts derailing terf and truscum shit so she feels. a lot lot better abt everything but particularly the lack of any intense dysphoria she had after reading stuff like that, esp the more verified(tm) articles from the more verified(tm) authors (like doctors and psychoneurologists and such)
so she figures out how she wants to word her questions nd asks tsu nd jirou to meet up. tsu nd jirou agree right away bc all of class 1-a is worried abt their class rep at this point :[ so theyre happy shes finally reaching out
iida is kinda a disaster when tryin to talk but she gets her point across. like “uhh this is a rlly bad way to ask but how did u guys know u were,,,trans?” nd tsu immediately catches on but jirou is only a lil suspicious until further into the conversation
anyway eventually jirou catches on the same as tsu and thats when tsu asks “iida do u think ur trans??”
nd iida is sooooooooo tired of feeling ashamed bc damn. she does think shes trans! she does. she shouldnt feel guilty for how she feels she cant help that. so after takin a moment to steel herself she says “yea” as confidently as one can in the situation
tsu nd jirou r immediately supportive nd ask iida for more details abt how shes feeling nd iida is just,,,so happy,, since shes already on an honesty streak that afternoon, shes able to roughly get her wack emotions into words nd tsu and jirou are like “yea thats valid ur valid iida. it doesnt matter if u dont have the trademark dysphoria or that u didnt know until later in life like ur still young. u say ur a girl, ur a girl” iida cries but only a bit bc damn months of agonizing over this. we stan one trans girl trio.........
anyway tsu and jirou ask her how she wants to move forward i.e. transitioning or telling anyone, and iida hadnt even considered transitioning before bc it felt so out of reach but shes absolutely ECSTATIC at the thought of bein able to look more feminine and it Shows. tsu and jirou r like “ok mood we were like that too right before startin estrogen”
so the first unofficial trans girl trio club meeting ends w tsu and jirou promising to help iida ask recovery girl abt hormones and iida sayin she doesnt want to come out just yet to the class/anyone else in general and tsu and jirou respectin that. i love them yall
anyway after a few months, iida is ready to try hormone treatment so tsu and jirou help her ask recovery girl for a meeting nd r moral support for her while they go thro the process of like figuring out what dosage she should start w/, how long should she take it, when a check up appointment should be, if recovery girl should tell iida’s parents yet or nah, all that stuff. anyway after that,  recovery girl gets her started on hormone treatment which iida is SUPER EXCITED abt and tsu and jirou tell her stories abt when they first started estrogen and AHHH I LOVE MY GIRLS SO MUCH FUCK
anyway eventually after some support from tsu and jirou via the unofficial trans girl club meetings and getting back on her feet confidence-wise, iida comes out to the class :,,,]]] theyre all super supportive and iida cries just a bit. tsu and jirou r so proud of her. aizawa is just glad his problem child #9 is feeling better
ashido and yaoyorozu get together and take iida shopping so she can have more feminine clothes which iida has a lot of fun w......shes never been necessarily big on shopping before (even if she is a part of the rich kid’s club lmao) but this trip is so EXCITING and ashido and momo r so happy for her and so ESCATIC to help her find some clothes and just oh my heart.......
the girls also have a sleepover during which they indoctrinate iida on all things traditionally feminine like makeup nd hair so that she knows the basics should she ever wanna mess arnd with that stuff. but also they just have fun doin normal things and just include iida in on being one of the gals nd iida is,,,so happy. tsu and jirou in particular r arnd her the whole night and wow my uwus they own them the unofficial trans girl club owns my uwus-
anyway so coming out and being accepted and transitioning is going so much better than iida thought it would be. she feels so safe and happy im crying.....anyway eventually some time later iida also gets permission to visit her family during a long weekend/short holiday w/e. nd while there she shakily but steadily comes out to her fam ofc her parents r so proud (her mom’s like ‘’ive always wanted a daughter yes!!! ily tenya’’) and tensei loves her all the same nd she cries a lil bit bc damn,,,,,,shes been fearing the exact opposite reaction for months
specifically she talks to tensei abt it for a little while and mentions her particular fears abt not being good enough to carry on the name “ingenium” nd he smiles at her nd is like “i would rather no one else but my little sister to carry on the name of ingenium” and bruh shes absolutely floored
nd yea. midoriya and uraraka absolutely love love love iida shes still their absolute fav. she joins the unofficial class 1-a trans* club as well as accidentally forms the unofficial class 1-a trans girl club. we love her,,,,
but yeah thats it. this post is so fucking long but oh well. stan iida!
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gimmeeshelter · 5 years ago
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hi babe I wanna talk music with u. tell me what you think is the decade defining album(s) of the 60s-80s and why? x
oh prepare for a long-ish ask. I think the 70′s and 80′s it’s kind of clear what albums were decade-defining but the 60′s really was when music made its largest shift ? if that makes sense my brain is fried from after writing this paper lol 
1960s
1. The Velvet Underground & Nico// The Velvet Underground
- Even though i hardly talk about the velvet undergound on my blog i am incredibly fond of this band. i think their sound brought something totally different to the music scene at the time, and the warhol influence fused music and art into an incredible union. i think the velvet underground is like the band of the art rock scene, with just a touch of mod? they’re incredible. 
2. Revolver// The Beatles
- In my opinion, Revolver is the best beatles album like its a banger from start to finish (except yellow submarine fuck that) I feel like this album has a really good balance between their original sound, while also adding so many different elements its just a really interesting album to me. I think this album is a really good example of the progression of rock throughout the 60s, especially compared to their earlier albums
3. Highway 61 Revisited// Bob Dylan
- okay i really could’ve put any dylan album on here from the 60s because theyre all so good and i think they all made such an influence on folk/rock music. his songwriting is literally indescribable (i know i dont need to tell you this). I picked highway 61 because it’s my favorite at the moment (from the 60s, my favorite dylan album is desire) I also think this shows the versatility of dylan i dunno ? Similar to revolver, highway 61 encapsulates the changing tides of the music scene in the 60s
4. Let It Bleed// The Rolling Stones
- oh my FUCK when i thnk of the 60s i think of this album almost immediately. It’s not my all time favorite stones album but god its up there. opening with such an apocolyptic song like gimme shelter ? bold ass move and im glad they did it. That song literally is a beacon for the end of the 60s, especially when you look back at all the crazy ass shit that happened in 69. That song sends fucking chills through my spine. And the end of the album with you cant always get what you want, i think the album starts with some deep, kind of menacing song but ends with this shining light? i dunno how to explain what im trying to say i hope you understand what im saying. I think everyone near the end of the 60s needed that shining light, and let it bleed is symbolic of that. 
5. Are You Experienced// The Jimi Hendrix Experience 
- Jimi Hendrix was one of the first artists to capatalize off of guitar based music (if that makes sense this is getting really long and im starting to ramble). I’m not saying he was the first person to have cool guitar solos or do any intricate playing (he low key was though) but he really revolutionized the way rock music was being played at the time and was one of the game changers. I firmly believe that without him and the music he made, music of the late 60′s and even 70s wouldnt have been what it was. 
6. Led Zeppelin II// Led Zeppelin
- okay im really torn between putting this album on the list. Because when I think of Zeppelin i don’t really think of the 60s because they are The band of the 70s ya know ? I was tempted to put this album in the 70s section of this ask but i feel like people would give me flack for that. I think this album really shows where music was heading going into the 70s. They pioneered that hard rock sound ya know ? I think this album, like let it bleed, is a good indicator for where music was heading. also cant forget about the wack ass lyrics that are in that album, talking about balls and shit how Foul. 
1970s
1. All Things Must Pass// George Harrison 
- if u really thought we weren’t gonna talk abt my fucking baby ur mistaken :((((((. I think this album is such a good example of music in the early 70s, still clinging to a bit of that 60s, peace and love vibe while also making a rock record. I guess the two biggest examples of that would be something like I dig love anf then comparing that to out of the blue. Its definitely got that 60s flare but there’s so much more depth ya know ? george is the best pls block me if u think otherwise bc ur crusty 
2. Dark Side of The Moon// Pink Floyd
- yes. i know this ablum is basic. but its still a good representation of music that defined the 70s. Floyd was the biggest success with the whole psychedelic rock thing, they made it enjoyable for everyone and i think that can be seen in dsotm. 
3. IV// Led Zeppelin
- You know why.
4. Talking Book// Stevie Wonder
- was tempted to put songs in the key of life but… i like talking book better lol. Any of his albums made in the 70s could be considered decade defining albums. Mans got incredible talent, and his lyrics spoke to a wide variety of people i think ? also the combination of funk and soul that hes famous for can later be seen in disco music. I think his music in general just speaks to a lot of people, and a lot of musicians take inspiration from him
5. Rumours// Stevie Nicks
- im gonna be up front with this one, everyone fuck with stevie and i bet u dont know anyone who doesnt like dreams or the chain. shit slaps what else can i say 
6. The Eagles// The Eagles
- The eagles are like the poster child for american rock (more specifically, west coast rock), which became popular in the 70s. I dunno when i think of the 70s i think of driving down the highway and when i think of driving down the highway i think of the eagles, its just common knowledge 
7. London Calling// The Clash
- similar to my problems with putting zeppelin ii in the 60s category, i thnk london calling really belongs in the 80s section maybe ? actually no, i think this album is a good synopsis of the punk movement that started in the mid/late 70s and then carried into the 80s 
1980′s
time for the sad boissssss
1. The Smiths// The Smiths
- god this melancholy fucker. personally this is my favorite smiths album, you could argue that the queen is dead is more impactful and youre probably right. But i think their first album brings the sadness to the forefront ya know ? like they were one of the first sad boi bands and i respect that shit. Also think this album is like the poster child for a sad teenager in the 80s, and god knows there were a lot of those weirdos. 
2. Purple Rain// Prince
- personally… controversy is my favorite prince album but we wont discuss. This album is so widely popular i grew up on this shit. like every song on it is a banger and defintely splits the line between pop and rock, something we see a lot when looking into music from the 80s 
3. Like A Virgin// Madonna 
- madonna was the first pop princess idc this album is like 80s pop defined. shes amazing, this album is amazing, what else can i say? im right :)
ive been typing for a long time im sorry im gonna end this now i hope this is good enough :( luv u and i hope u enjoyed my thoughts. also i cut a lot of albums out bc i didnt want to make it too long but :((((( okay bye
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pbandjesse · 5 years ago
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I was feeling really sad for the last couple hours. I dont know why and it wasnt fun. But Im feeling a little better. Today was a pretty good day and I feel selfish for being sad. I hope that a good nights sleep helps but like. Who knows. 
Last night I fell asleep before James got back from what was a very bad game. And because I was slightly following it on twitter I knew he was going to be sad and I was full of anxiety over it and that sucked. But I fell asleep and woke up briefly when he got back. I had very bizarre dreams and was pretty tired because of it. So when my alarm went off at 8 I was like. Nope. 
I woke up for real at 930 and felt pretty good. I stretched a little. Got dressed. Felt good. Didnt realize it was almost 70 degrees outside. In January. So when I did leave I was like. To warm in my sweater. 
I was also worried I was going to be late for my class. But I was exactly on time and while I would have liked a couple extra minutes to stretch I was feeling pretty good today! Much stronger. Some of our conditioning is becoming easier. And we did a climbing thing where we climb and then we go down, switch feet, and climb again. And I didnt have to stop in between. I switched feet and went right back up and I was so proud. I was still winded but not as bad. And I really just had a lot of fun today. 
I think my one critique of the class is I want to be doing more fun tricks. But I know Im not there yet. So the little things were practicing are perfect and Im glad we are working through it this way. 
We finished up with some gentle cool downs. We did some spins! And then it was time to go. 
I drove to taco bell. Which was excellent. And then I went over to the pet store and got a frog! His name is Pancake. Both because he is flat and because of the IHOP pun. I also got him a couple plants and blood worms to eat. 
I went to Marshals next. I had a $10 coupon. So I was going to get a black fleece like Ive been saying. But then I tried one on and I was like. Oh never mind. So I wandered around and was just looking and ended up finding a very similar jacket to the one I lost on ebay. And I was like. Yessss.. But it was a much lighter denim wash and I wasnt sure. So I kept looking and ended up finding a stonewash black jean jacket with a sherpa lining. Which is something James really wanted. So now we will share that and it was cheaper then the one on ebay and Im excited about it. 
I was in line for forever. The line was legit wrapping down to the clothes aisles. But I had my podcast and I wasnt to bothered. I mostly felt tired and wanted to sit down. 
Once I got outside I was like. I need to sit. And then when I was sitting I was like. I need to lay down. So I drove home. Just white knuckled the whole time because I was so sleepy. Okay Im exaggerating but not that much. I wanted to be home. 
I got back around 2 and put some stuff away. I got Pancake's tank set up with his plants and got him in there. Hes so tiny. Just like bigger then a quarter. I wanted to unpack my bag from yesterday but I didnt make it happen. I just got changed and opened some windows. It was so warm out. I ran the dishwasher and laid down finally. 
I watched some videos and eventually fell asleep. I slept until around 5 as the sun was going down. I felt a lot better. I had a snack and watched videos and waited for James to come home. 
We were thinking friends were going to come over but it didnt work out. So instead we ordered pizza and played uno. I was feeling really sad and low but I dont feel so bad anymore. I wish this feeling would stop and I could focus more. I need to work on my coping mechanisms. I feel like I have lost those. But I am trying. 
Tiffany called me and asked if she could drop off some stuff for tomorrow. Because she had to go to a funeral. Of course. So she and Chelsi stopped by. It helped start to pull me out of my funk. I gotta keep pulling myself out of this.
I am at the museum tomorrow and then teaching and then I hope to work on a couple things at home. I am going to do my very very best. But for now I am going to go take a shower. I hope you all sleep good tonight and have a nice day tomorrow. Goodnight!!!
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cosmichoneyedblossoms · 6 years ago
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White Sands
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MERMAN Shownu X Reader
Genre: Fluffy
Word Count: 2,894
A/N: Okay, so, not gunna lie, this one was hard to write, but also fun! Thank you @xkpopobsessedx for helping me create ideas for this cutie! Anyway, I hope y’all enjoy!
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Day One: 8:00 PM
“It’s been so long since we’ve been on a vacation together. What’s it been like, five years?”
“Mmm...” I hummed, scrolling through my phone. My mother tapped my leg, my eyes dragging up to see her face, “What?”
“Put your phone away. We’re going on this trip to get you out of your funk since that stupid boy broke your heart.”
“Can we not talk about Dean, please...” I asked, turning my head to look out the window.
“This four day get away at the beach should help you.”
“Yeah, because the ocean and sand can help me get rid of my depression...” 
“Don’t be like that, Y/N...” She whispered and I tuned her voice out as I watched the trees turn into beaches, tan sands fading almost to white due to the season change. The water soaking in the still warm air and bright sun, resting upon the shore line waiting to cover someone’s feet; I bet it’s starting to get cold, not like we’ll probably swim anyway. 
“We’re here.” We pulled up to a house that sat on the beach. The siding of the house colored a cerulean blue, fashioned with dark wood steps leading up to the door; even though the house was weathered, it still held some beauty. We stepped out of the car, pulling our luggage from the trunk, and then made our way up to the door. My mother opened the deep red door and we were greeted by the squeals of my older sisters, Anessa and Samantha.
“So glad you guys could finally make it.” Anessa took our mother’s luggage from her, sliding it over to the side of the couch.
“I’m sorry, girls. There was so much traffic on the highway.”
“No surprise there.” Sam grunted from the couch.
“Sorry to interrupt, but will you show me to my room, please?” I asked, Anessa skimmed over me, placing her hands on her hips.
“Well, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes. It’s been so long since I’ve seen you. I think the last time I saw you was at Christmas dinner with De—”
“All right, all right, let’s not pester, Y/N. She’s had a long week. Sam, honey, show her to her room, please.”
“Ah, okay, mom.” Sam replied, getting up from the couch. I followed her down the hall to the last room on the left and she opened the door, “Let me know if you need anything, okay?”
“Mmm...” I nodded and walked into the blinding room. Pale blue painted walls, dark wood flooring, driftwood colored furniture, white bedding, and a window seat facing the ocean.
Cute...
I opened my bag, unpacked my clothes into the dresser, then closed the curtains over the windows, and finally laid down on the bed, resting my eyes.
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Day Two: 4:00 AM
I opened my eyes to a dark bedroom, the sound of the ocean waves seeping into the room.
How long have I been out?
I pulled my phone from under the pillow, the screen lighting up to show 4:02 on the clock. I laid my phone down, turning on the lamp on the side table, then getting up to pull a sweater from the dresser. I tugged it on, slipping on my shoes, and stepping out of the bedroom into the dim hallway. I padded my way across the floor into the dining room, sliding the glass balcony door open, letting the sea salt tainted air kiss my face. I closed the door behind me and walked down the balcony stairs, down into the sand. The sound of the waves crashing soothed my numb mind, my body being pulled closer to the shore; I sat down close to the water, watching it roll in and drift back out, when something moving through the water caught my eye.
A person swimming at this time of night?
I watched the body move closer and closer until I could make out his features in the moonlight— shaggy dark brown hair, soft cheek bones, but killer jaw line, thick lips, and sharp eyes.
Wow, he’s gorgeous...
He came closer until his body rested on the shore, everything but his head still under the water, “Hey...”
Is he talking to me?
I looked around, searching for someone else he could be talking to when he spoke again, “Who are you looking for?”
“I was making sure you were actually talking to me.” I confessed, tugging at the sleeves of my sweater. His eyes wrinkled as a beaming smile appeared on his lips.
“What is a beautiful girl like you doing out here in the middle of the night?”
“I could ask you the same thing. Isn’t the water cold?” I asked, moving closer to him, the water starting to touch my feet.
“Not really. I live in the water so it doesn’t really effect me.”
“Ah, you mean you’re always coming out to swim—”
“No...” The water splashed behind him and I leaned to the side, the dark red color coming into focus, “I’m a merman.” I got up to my feet, traipsing into the water, the iciness making me hiss, but I needed to make sure he wasn’t playing around with me, I needed to see if he was telling the truth.
“I thought mermaids and mermen were just old sailors tales, not real life...?” I questioned as he turned over, sitting on the ocean floor, his waist submerged under the water.
“We stay hidden for our safety.” He lifted his tail, the deep red iridescent scales glittering under the moonlight.
“What a shame, you’re a beautiful creature...” I ran my hand over his scales, his tail twitching at my touch. I flicked my eyes up to his face, his cheeks ruddied and his bottom lip caught between his teeth, “I’m sorry, I touched you without even asking,”
“No, no, that’s okay. I was just shocked you actually came out into the cold ocean to touch me.” He teased, his wet locks fell onto his forehead as he lifted his hand, “I haven’t introduced myself yet, I’m Hyunwoo, but you can call me Shownu.”
“Oh,” I took his hand into my own, shaking it, “I’m Y/N.”
“A beautiful name for someone like you.” My cheeks burned at his statement, his chestnut eyes stared into mine, his hand pulling me close, “Y/N...” My name bubbled from his lips, his voice hypnotizing me, “I’m sorry, but the sun is starting to come up, so I must take my leave.”
“Oh...” I turned towards the horizon, hints of pinks starting to tint the sky, “Has it really been that long?”
He grunted to my question, “Can I see you tomorrow night, well I should say tonight?”
“Of course you can, if you want to.” A smile spread over his lips, his teeth peeking through his lips.
“Lovely. Meet here at midnight?”
I nodded, biting my lip.
“I’ll see you tonight, Y/N.” Shownu swam out into the ocean, soon diving down and disappearing.
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Day Three: 12:00 am
“You came, Y/N.” Shownu laid against the shore, just as he did the night before.
“Did you think I wouldn’t?”
Shownu pondered my question then shrugged, “I wasn’t sure, but I’m glad you did.”
“I actually came prepared this time, too.”
“What do you mean by that?” He asked as I pulled off my sweater, Shownu clearing his throat, “Y/N, what’re you doing?”
“Taking off my clothes, so I can get in the water in my bathing suit and keep my street clothes clean and dry.” I laughed, seeing his cheeks flush.
“I thought you were—”
“Oh, I know what you thought.” I teased, tossing my shorts with my sweater away from the shore and stepping into the water, taking a seat next to him. He cleared his throat once more, scooting closer to me, peering into my face.
“Y/N?” 
“Yes?”
“Has anyone ever told you that you have the prettiest eyes? Especially in the moonlight?”
I laughed a bit, nudging him, “Has anyone ever told you that you’re such a flirt?” Shownu let out a chuckle leaning into me, sighing comfortably, “I do have a question for you, Shownu.”
“And I have an answer for you... probably.”
“If staying hidden was to keep you safe, why did you show yourself to me?”
“Hmm... that’s a good question...” He flicked his tail up, sucking his teeth, “Since I was a child, I could always tell when someone needed something. May it be an ear or someone to lean on, I could just feel it in my bones and seeing you last night, I could tell something was wrong, but I didn’t need to ask since it’s none of my business...” He paused for a moment, his hand ghosting over my fingers, “I’m here for you, whatever you need, Y/N.” I looked at him, his eyes catching mine.
“Shownu...” I felt a blush start to prickle at my cheeks and I looked down at my lap, soon his warm wet fingers brushed strands of hair behind my ear, “Tomorrow is my last night here so, I wouldn’t get too attached to me.”
“I’m not going to worry about that right now. I’ll make the moments you spend with me memorable, to where you won’t forget me or want to leave me.”
“Not like I could forget meeting a merman.” I breathed, moving out into the water.
“Oh, would you like me to leave then?” He huffed, moving out into the water with me.
“No!” I exclaimed and Shownu snorted, trying to stifle a laugh, “Don’t be mean.” I splashed water at him and he chuckled.
“Oh, now it’s on.” He hissed, playfully pulling me to him, his fingers poking at my sides making me squirm and giggle under his touch. I struggled to get away from him, but his hands ceased their attack and held me close to him, his warmth spreading through my back.
“Is this where you kill me?” I joked, a laugh leaving him. 
“If I wanted to kill you, I would’ve already.” I rested my head against his chest, watching the moon ripple on the water. 
“The more time I spend out here in the water, the more I feel myself wanting to stay. For a change of scenery, to get away from my home, away from the memories that linger in that town...” I ran my fingers over Shownu’s arm, his grip tightening.
“Then why don’t you stay?”
“There’s just things I have to return to... work, school... life in general. I rather spend my time here, with you, soaking up the moonlight and avoiding stress.”
“Stress? Why are you so stressed?”
“It’s a long story.”
“We’ve got three more hours until daylight, so we’ve got time.” 
“Well...” I went into deep detail of my life for the past few months since my break up with my ex and about how I’ve been dealing with it. Every once in a while Shownu would ask a question and then fall silent again; once I finished my life story, Shownu rested his head in the nook of my neck.
“I wish you never had to go through that, Y/N... You’re such a sweet girl. If I were human, I would keep you by my side forever.” He whispered, placing a gentle kiss on my shoulder.
“You’re too kind, Shownu... We just met and I feel like I’ve known you for forever.” I relaxed into him, sighing a bit, noticing the break of daylight leaking out onto the water, “Time to go, Shownu...”
“Just a few more minutes, please.” Shownu tightened his grip on me, burying his face into my damp hair.
“Just a few, I don’t want you getting caught.” Shownu lifted his head, turning it in close to my cheek, his lips grazing against my skin.
“Alright.” Shownu held me close for a few more moments, short silent moments, before he let me go and placed a soft kiss against my cheek, “Midnight, my dear.”
“Deal.” I smiled, watching him dive down, and disappear.
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Day Four: 12:00am
I sat down on the cold sand in jeans and a thick sweater, the sea salt breeze starting to get colder every night. I watched the water ripple, waiting for Shownu to appear. Pulling my knees up to my chest, I rested my head on them, my eyes getting heavy. I dug my phone from my pocket, looking at the clock that read 12:10.
Maybe he got caught up with something... He knows it’s our last night...
I hugged my legs, burying my face into my sweater to fight off the cold breeze, closing my eyes.
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“Y/N...” A gentle voice called out, rousing me from my sleep. I pulled my head up for the bright sunlight to blind me.
It’s morning?
I rubbed my eyes, blinking them a few times before trying to focus on anything around me.
He didn’t show...
Warmth spread over the top of my head, causing me to look up, a shadow looming over me, “I’m sorry it took me so long, Y/N, but I’m here now...” Shownu’s voice met my ears and I smiled.
“That’s funny... you sound like—” The shadow crouched down, my eyes focusing on the voice’s face, Shownu’s features coming into focus.
“It is me, dork.” He whispered and I looked him up and down, no tail, but human legs covered by the blanket I brought out.
“Shownu?!” I squealed, jumping from the sand to face him, “H-How is this possible?” I studdered, trying to take in his body. He stood, a little wobbly on his feet.
“When my father passed, he knew I was not meant for the sea, he gave me an elixir saying that it could make one sprout legs to walk the earth. I thought it was all a joke so I didn’t mess with it, but then I met you and I needed to at least try to see if it was real... and now...” He chuckled, “I’m here, in front of you, naked...”
“Oh shit, Shownu, let’s get you inside.” I took his hand, tugging him up to the balcony, “When did you get here? How long did you let me sleep?” I walked up the stairs and then I pushed open the sliding door to be met by my mother’s and my sister’s stares.
“Y/N? Who is the naked—”
“No time to explain, mom. Anessa, do you still have some of your husbands old clothes that don’t fit him anymore?” They stared at me then skimmed over Shownu, him shyly lifting his hand, waving— them not moving, “Y’all!” I yelled, Anessa rushing to her room.
“Let me go draw a bath for him, you must be freezing, dear.” My mother looked over him once more before going to the bathroom. Sam just sat there, ogling him, her mouth slightly ajar.
“Sam, go do something with yourself...” I growled, pulling Shownu over to the bathroom, my mother sliding out to let us through. I closed the door behind us and I sighed leaning against the counter, “They’re going to be the death of me...”
“They seem nice.”
“They can be, until they see a gorgeous man walk through the door.” Shownu chuckled at my words, “Alright, merman, get into the bath.” He looked at me and then at the bathtub.
“The what?”
“The bath...” I pointed at the tub and he shrugged his shoulders, starting to get into the bathtub with the blanket wrapped around his waist, “Oh, hold on...” I took the blanket into my hands, closing my eyes, pulling it from his body.
“Can I not get that wet?”
“I mean you could, but the bath is to wash you.”
“Wash me?” I opened my eyes to be met with his confused gaze.
“Yes, wash you. Now sit.” He sat down at my words.
“It’s hot.”
“Yup, that’s how it’s supposed to be.” I took the cup that was on the side of the tub and dipped it into the water, then pouring it over his hair. I grabbed the bottle of shampoo and he cocked his head to the side.
“What’s that?”
“Shampoo, it’s to wash your hair.” I opened the cap and squirted the thick liquid into my hand and rubbed it into his hair, creating a thick lather, and then pouring the water through his hair once more to rise it out. I grabbed another bottle and handed it to him, “Okay so this is body wash, you take this...” I grabbed a washcloth from the rack over the toilet and handed it to him, “Soak that in the water and add some of the body wash to the cloth and clean your body. I’m going to go get the clothes from Anessa.”
“Mmm.” He nodded his head and I left the bathroom, Anessa, Sam, and my mother looking at me.
“What?”
“Who is that man?” Sam crossed her arms, huffing.
I laughed a little, “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you, just think of him as my new companion... Anessa, those clothes?”
“Ah.” She handed me a stack of clothes and I smiled, “When we get home, I’ll send these back.”
“Just keep them. They’re too big for him anyway.”
“Thanks.” I turned back and walked into the bathroom to see Shownu standing outside of the tub, a towel wrapped around his waist, “Oh, you’re done?”
“I think so.” 
“Well, c’mon, let’s go get you dressed.” I opened the door once again, starting to walk out when Shownu’s hand gripped onto the fabric of my sweater, following closely behind me.
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Shownu sat on my bed, clothed in a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt, his eyes roaming the bedroom. I dug in one of the dresser drawers, pulling out another towel and I walked over in front of him, “Your hair is still wet, you’re going to get a cold, goofy.” I gently rubbed his hair, drying the dripping ends, his hands wrapping around my waist.
“Is this what it would be like everyday with you?” He nuzzled his face into my chest, my cheeks burning at the feeling of his warmth radiating through my body.
“Shownu, why did you change?”
Not missing a beat, he spoke, “Because I found someone I couldn’t live in the water with, so I changed...” He gazed up at me, his unwavering chestnut eyes looking into my soul, “So I could be with you.” 
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paradoxidolatry · 6 years ago
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Brotherly Love
@birdhole , @beatconductor a lil bit
TG: hey TG: sup
TT: Hey. TT: Not much.  Lunch break at work. TT: Sup?
TG: oh thats sweet TG: sucks theres no free pizza in it when you work as a cop huh TG: i guess its overall kind of a step up from the pizza gig tho
TT: Right? Free donuts though. TT: But nah, yeah, not so bad. TT: Didn't get a chance to tell you about it but I figure Dave or whoever's already spilled those beans. TT: Kinda weird, right?
TG: yeah dave told me TG: donuts just like a real cop huh TG: still cant quite wrap my head around this cop thing tbh TG: i can see you working as a LOT of things but a cop? thats wild
TT: Yeah. TT: I mean, I figured.  Got all that military experience, right? TT: But I didn't want to go back to the military. TT: Plus, working as a cop is an equal mix of 'keeps me active' and 'allows me to work around certain roadblocks in regards to the acquisitions business', so it was a good compromise. TT: Better than fast food and skin flicks again, at any rate.
TG: i mean i guess that makes logical sense n all TG: still fucking wild as shit to me TG: guess you can still wear a uniform even its obviously not as sweet as the fast food ones
TT: Yeah, I really miss that old greasy apron. TT: But what can you do?
TG: the grease just made your eyes pop in that special way ykno TG: chicks love it
TT: They fuckin do, don't they? TT: But somethin tells me you didn't message me to talk about the chicks missing my pizza funk.
TG: you sure about that? its a pretty great topic you could write a book on it become rich quick with your pick up tips
TT: Hey, I'm already on chapter 7: the Sausage Party. TT: But really though. TT: What's up, boss?
TG: nothing TG: i was just TG: thinking about you is all
> Heart, squeeze. TT: That right? TT: Cool, cool. TT: Was thinking about you earlier too, actually.
TG: oh? any reason or
[Dave txt @ bro] im watching u [Dave txt @ bro] > that chicken image
TT: Just, y'know. TT: Was outside on a smoke break and I saw a couple of pigeons hanging out, eating some sandwich or some shit on the sidewalk and like. TT: Got me thinking about you, and like. TT: I spent the past 13 years thing you're dead or some shit, and now you're alive and it's. TT: Just fuckin buck wild. TT: Pardon me for sound fucking sappy but it's kind of like a dream come true.
[TT > Dave: I'm behaving, dad.]
TG: ...am i a pigeon now? tho i do admit i would eat that floor sandwich(edited) TG: yeah its...its fucking wild huh? TG: kinda thought id never see you again even after TG:  i got away and shit TG: idk why not like you up and died but? after looking for you and you werent there i dunno i guess TG: i thought you just TG: werent going to come back TG: ...you didnt even see my wings yet you dont get to relate me to birds just yet dude
TT: I mean, I saw them in a picture. TT: One of you and Dave and a bunch of trolls and some old dude in front of a candy cane dildo? TT: But also you post about birds and shit all the time, so I figured that was sort of your Thing now. TT: And ... well.  I dunno. TT: Almost didn't. TT: I was just gonna stay on Earth, maybe pop in to visit every so often. TT: But then all that shit happened and Dave wasn't answering my messages, so I thought he was dead too, and...well. TT: I guess I'm, uh... grateful to the apocalypse for.  I guess bringing you back to me? TT: Well, no. TT: But like, at least letting me know you're alive.
TG: oh...yeah thats TG: thats my sisters actually and uh..shit what even is grig? grandpa i guess TG: already know mr d after all TG: i mean... im not sure how i feel yet TG: i guess im sorta glad because TG: i mean it has been my embarrassing dream to play family with you again for a while TG: i want to be a family again TG: a lot TG: its just TG: hard
TT: Sisters, huh?  Well damn, you got the whole family package with these folks, huh? TT: Nice.  How long you been with them? TT: Yeah, I figured. TT: I didn't, and don't, make it easy. I know. TT: A lot easier when you were a baby, even if our folks were shit, just cuz, y'know. TT: Everything hadn'tt happened yet. TT: Hadn't started to completely fuckin lose my mind and treat you like dogshit. TT: But I mean.  I dunno. TT: I'm not gonna force you or nothin. TT: But if you ever wanted to come backto the apartment and chill for a day, see how you feel about it? TT: That'd be uh. TT: That'd be really nice.
TG: 3 years TG: as long as ive been TG: away from scratch... TG: i..yeah i guess maybe TG: can you even handle seeing me get gay with dave tho
TT: God.  You were with Scratch that whole fuckin time? TT: Fuckin sonnuvabitch refused to tell me what he did with you. TT: Anyway. TT: Handling y'all and your homogay is a small price to pay at the end of the day. TT: Even if it's still. TT: Kinda really weird from my perspective. TT: But I respect y'all and he takes good care of you, so I can't complain too much, right?
TG: ...yeah like ten years TG: kinda fucked up huh TG: ill..ill think about it TG: okay so im gonna be real with you here for a sec okay TG: i TG: messaged you because i was talking to dave and i realized i missed you and TG: that i TG: kindawantahugiguess
TT: ...Yeah? TT: I can do a hug, yeah. TT: Where are you?  I can meet you, if you wanna.
TG: ...workin TG: at [coords] TG: dont arrest me mr officer these drugs are prescription
TT: I'll leave the cuffs in the car. TT: What happens off-duty stays off-duty, though, so. TT: See you in five.
TG: kay > Try not to freak out. Freak out anyways.
> Pull up by the curb a short walk away and park. > Look, you even pay for the parking meter and everything. > Step out of the car in your full uniform and approach Sock, one hand in  your pocket, the other raised in a wave hello.
> Oh god, he really fucking is a god damn cop. That's so damn weird. God. > Not as weird as randomly meeting up with him for a hug though. Damn it that was the dumbest idea. > You wave back, trying hard to look cool and not like you are dying on the inside and failing miserably.
> You stride up alongside him and... ...well, now what, actually. > Neither of you are very good at this kind of planning, are you. > Damnit, Striders. "Hey." > Now just to... > ... > Open your arms up? > Yeah.  That's how hugs happen.
> Oh god, he's going right for it.Oh god. Not even small talk or anything really bro? > Maybe that's better anyways because god know you don't know what to say. "Hey." > You take a deep breath and you...Go for the fucking hug. Squeeze that big bro tight.
> Aww shit here it comes and here he is.  All up and hugging you. > Actually, that's uh. > That's real nice. > You wrap your arms around him and pull him in for a good, tight hug. > It's probably not the most comfortable thing, what with your radio strapped onto your chest and name plates aand shit, but. > At least for you?  This is a fucking good hug. > (Don't you dare tear up in public.)
> You don't really care about the cofort level of this, it's something you've been craving for 13 years now, a little radio isn't going to stop you from enjoying it. > It's nice. It's familiar, like all the good parts of Bro you've been missing wrapped up for you in one big huggable form. Easy to forget all the shit for a moment. > But the moment does end and when you pull away you have to wipe at you eyes like an idiot. "Uh...Th-thanks."
> Aww, shit goddamn.  He's teaaring up too under those glasses. > You swipe one knuckle under your shades, and you take a steaadying breath. "Hey, yeah, no problem." > Breathe easy, Strider.  You glance up for a moment as you see a fatass snowflake come drifting down, then you look to Sock again. "Hey, you wanna maybe grab some lunch with me?  Haven't eaten yet and it's still my break, so."
> Well at least you are both sappy motherfuckers now. > Oh. You didn't expect that. You think about what Dave told you earlier "Stay in control" and promptly decide to fuck that advice because shit. You are already here. You already went for it like an idiot. "Yeah sure. Gonna have Donuts like a proper cop?" > You make such a face at the snow. Ugh, you didn't really prepare for that kinda weather, fuck.
> You snort a laugh and give your flat stomach a pat. "Gotta work on that signature cop gut, don't I? C'mon." > You gesture behind you with a jerk of your thumb. "Hop in up front.  You can pick the place."
"Hell yeah you do. You look like a fake ass striper cop dude." > You get into the car and immediately get the seatbelt. Doesn't feel safe otherwise. You don't really like cars still but you can't pin point why. It's just a weird personality quirk yeah? But you are used to being in one at this point of your life. > Just drive carefully. Please.
> You hop in and buckle up too, both pleased and a litttle saddened that you didn't even need to remind Sock to put on his seatbelt. > Poor kid. > Luckily, you are an impeccably safe driver, and the drive to Wherever is smooth and uneventful.
> Old habits die hard. > You feel kind of awkward in the car with him, it's too silent for our tastes. > You get out of the car at whatever this amazing food place he's taking you is. Fingers crossed for fast food- "Y'know kinda funny. Always figured my first frive in a cop car would be because I'm getting arrested."
> You snort a laugh.  It's Sock's old favorite pizza place. > God you hope he still likes this shit. > Also this wasn't a Pizza Pimp before, was it?  It was Gino's-- > Wait. > Ugh, well, maybe Dave's not at work. "If you're planning on getting arrested, you're doing this pushing thing wrong, kid."(edited)
> Oh the Pizza Pimp. Fucking score. Maybe Dave is there, that would be rad. "I didn't say I was, I said I didn't think I'd ride a cop car otherwise. Your hearing getting bad?" > You immediately freeze after saying that. Oh man, actually sassing Bro though? Please don't hit me.
> Dave is unfortunately not there, but he sure would love to.
> You catch that freeze, and you... > You snort a little, before pointing to your ears. "Too many concerts and phat-ass beats.  Knew I shouldn't have gotten all up and personal with those speakers.  Who knew the grown-ups were right about that?" > You smile, and it's a little awkward cuz you sure as hell have never been the smiling type, before you hold open the door for him. "C'mon, before we freeze our asses off."
> Oh. Okay. It's cool. It's chill. In a quite literal sense even so you get your silly ass inside. > A smile though? You haven't seen your brother smile in...far longer than you haven't seen him for sure. > That little scare knocked the speech right out of you though so you just awkwardly sit down at the next best table, suddenly really not sure how good of an idea this was.
> You take a seat opposite him, and when the server approaches, you order yourself a water instead of a soda. > Who are you, even. > You glance over the menu, humming softly.  Some of these item names... fitting for a place called Pizza Pimp. "You wanna split one, or do individuals, or?"
> Who is he indeed. You order a black coffee instead of apple juice though, so maybe the traditional Strider beverages are just staying outside today. "Uhhh..Not super hungry honestly I don't mind sharing one." > You haven't been able to eat a whole pizza at once in a while but you don't say that.
"Alright.  We'll split a medium and you can take the rest home if you want." > You let him pick the toppings too.  This really is a strange Strider day.
> The strangest. Do they have nuggets as topping because you want that.
> They might have like, baked chicken, which is kinda like nuggets and also? Is Carro-approved.
> Do you think the pizza pimp doesn't have a nugget topping what kinda fool do you take Dave for.
> A big one. >:3
> LISTEN Nuggets have been added like at least two months ago. Cock Special.
> Goddamnit, Dave.
> Sock loves Dave and the Cock Special Pizza. Prepare ya taste buds Bro.(edited)
"One Cock Special with extra cock please" > Yes, this is exactly how you order.
> Oh your face. > You're so fucking proud.  Dave sure is your little brother, and so too is Sock. > Bless these fucking kids.
"Hope you like it, it's my fav." > Both the pizza and you know.
> Yeah.  Yeah, you know. "Sure I will." > Snort a laugh. "This sure isn't Gino's anymore, huh.  You remember that place?"
"Oh yeah. Man..That's been a while. Clover gifted the place to Dave what? 2 years ago?" > Back when you were on a no homo basis. Memories.
> [Clover: nya face]
"Used to be your favorite, but maybe that's because it was free when I worked here. ...Clover?"
"I'm always a slut for free food but I still digged their shit later. Oh uh..Yeah. Little green guy? 4 of the Felt?" > Should..You now have mentioned that?
> [Dave] Oh no.
> There's this shift in your face.  It's not a frown, but a certain tightening of your lips as you're hit with the full brunt of what Sock just said. "...Dave's...doing business with the Felt?"
> WHOOPSIES >Oh. Oh, oh, oh shit. You fucked up. You didn't really think about that when you said it. At all. Shit. Fuck. Damn. "Hahaha whaaaat? Noooo. Of course not! He'd never uh...Clover is just y'know his uh... Sugar daddy yeah. Cash money man, can't say no to that even from a greenie right?" > Well it's not entirely a lie. You are sweating though.
> You paw at your face and you sit back in your seat, eyebrows knit together tightly. > Looks like you're going to have to have a little talk with Dave when you get home. "...No, guess not.  Desperate times and all that, right?"
"Yeah exactly! Haha..." > God this is uncomfortable. You are going to warn Dave but you already feel like shit. Fuck. "Don't...Don't hurt him okay?" > There's fear in your eyes now. Not for you but for your boyfriend, which is so much worse in your eyes.
> That snaps you Right out of your bad thought spiral and you quickly wave your hand. "Hey, no, no.  Not gonna hurt him.  It's chill." > There's that smile again, even if it's uneasy and a bit green around the gills.  Your brother and the Felt... "Really.  Just surprised he hadn't mentioned it before now."
> [Dave] GUESS WHY.
" 'kay..." > He probably hadn't mentioned it for a reason. You couldn't have known Dave wasn't supposed to do business with the Felt but you still feel like shit. It makes sense in hindsight and considering your history of course but...You just plain didn't know. > The Pizza arrives but you suddenly don't feel very hungry at all, sipping on you coffee awkwardly instead.
> You're, similarly, not hungry, but you've got to salvage this.  Not telling when or if Sock will agree to see you again after this. "Sorry, I just... Y'know, getting offered a gift by those guys.  If they had snatched Dave too..." > You shake your head, and sigh it off.  Out with the bad. "But they didn't, and that's that.  So." > You take up a slice of the pizza and you point is casually at Sock, an eyebrow quirked. "What're you out there peddling?"
> Oh. You'd really rather not follow that line of thought, yeah.  Smooth topic change. "Dude, don't think I should be discussing that with a cop in a pizzeria. Mr D would murder me man."
"Hey." > You make a show of taking off your badge and laying it upside down on the table. "Off-duty, not a cop.  So is it the good shit, or is it like, oregano in a dimebag being passed off as weed."
"We're still in public man." > And you don't want to piss off your Dad on top of the shit you just pulled.
"Yeah, yeah.  Weren't you in public anyway?" > You chuckle a little and you point toward the kitchen area. "Your big bro used to sell shitty dimebags out of there, way back.  Dealt to all the line cooks."
" Course you did." > You roll your eyes behind your shades. "What you want an inventory list? Okay I'll just tell you my favorite product aight? Kinder Überraschungseier......The surprise is Cocaine." > Huh, sure did slip into your mother tongue there. Welp..
> Okay.  You actually laugh then. "You're selling Kinder Überraschungseier full of Cocaine.  Shut the fuck up, seriously?" > You're nodding approvingly now. "That's a fucking great idea.  Where the fuck'd you get the chocolates, though? Make them yourself?"
> That makes you feel..really proud? Huh. You can't stop the big dorky grin from spreading on your face. "Best idea I ever had, honestly. I'm importing them from earth, duh. Along with a bunch of other banned sweets and shit. Who the fuck thought peeps are illegal anyways?"
> You balk at that and you laugh again. "Peeps are illegal here-- wait, shit, right." > Smack your forehead. "That's my job to know that now.  Wow, fuckin fire me now."
"Maybe I should show you my stock, just as a reminder. A fucking lot of dumb shit is. Fucking Lattes were banned man. Until the King unbanned them just for Jude which is honestly so fucking stupid. Way to play favorite, just like royalty should am I right? Not that I'm complaining, love me a big fat Latte." > Man it's...Nice to be able to make that kind of shit tier level german dick joke and to know you're gonna be understood just fine.
> You snort your water and you pull a face,but you're clearly goofing around a loving it. "Fucking nasty, dude.  I don't need to hear about your love of big hot fuckin Lattes."
"Aren't you glad the prospitian monarchy digs a steaming hot Latte too? What a life that would be otherwise." > You snort yourself.
"Jesus christ.  Fuckin whities, dude." > You stuff some pizza in your mouth and you talk withyour mouth full like the fat nasty trash you are. "Can you believe I have to work with them?  Like what the fuck."
"The Queen gives me the creeps with her I love everyone bull. And the King seems like a huge fucking idiot so...Congrats man. Jackpot."
"Not had the chance to meet either, but this is the closest I've gotten to infiltrating the corrupt government yet.  Maybe if I keep my shit up, I can finally overthrow them from the inside." > You are entirely dead seriouus.
"What's the masterplan? Shoot them in public?" > You aren't but you also don't mind the topic. Not a fan of these guys.
"Nah, nah, nothing like that.  Too messy.  Besides." > You gesture at the scar that runs oveer your eyes. "Never been a fan of guns."
"I know." > Hell maybe you should be grateful he ain't. Swords fucked you over bad enough. "Seems like a popular approach is all. Like historically or whatever. But I guess you gotta go for something less stale huh?"
"Of course.  Flashy's the only way to be when you're taking out a corrupt system of government."
"Looking forwards to the show Bro." > Except you hope he's fucking joking.
> You totally fucking aren't. > You toss him a wink, which of course he can't see all that well behind your shades. "Hope it's a good one.  You gonna eat any pizza, lil bro?"
"Oh, right." > You finally grab a piece too. "How's the Cock Special?"
> Stuff the rest of your piece into your mouth and brush the crumbs off of your fingers. "It's not big hot Latte, but it's nice and tasty all up in my mouth, so it'll do."
"I mean we can grab a Latte next time-" > Did you just say next time. Did you just imply you want to meet up like this again? Shit. > Stuff your mouth with Pizza real quick.
> Oh. > Oh... That makes yourr heart do the smiley emote. > You grin a liittle bit about that and you say, voice kinda soft, "Yeah... alright.  I'd like that."
"Me too...I think." > If you don't hurt my boyfriend tonight that is, is what you think.
> Don't you worry, Sock.  Not gonna hurt your boyfriend tonight. > You're not gonna be home, so Dave gets to go unhurt for another night.
> Or any other night Bro.(edited) > Or day, or ever:
> Well, at least you'll try to keep your cool when you talk to Dave about it later.
> That's a good start.
> Fuck yeah.  Before you all finish up here, you nod back to the streets now lightly coat with snow. "You going back to your corner, right?  You need a jacket?"
"I mean, I'll live..." > But it's pretty obvious that you don't have any especially warm clothes on you, you know like an idiot.
"Yeah, and you'll get sick, doofus." > You shrug off your jacket--it's a plain black windbreaker, while you wait for your city issue polcie jacket to come in--and you ball it up, handing it over to him. "Here."
> You open your mouth to respond but the Jacket is already in your hands. Oh. That's..Oh. > Is that what it's like to have a caring older brother? "Thanks..." > The Jacket is far too big for you and smells like Bro. It's a weird feeling to put it on. Like a hug you can wear. > Your heart is doing several emotions.
"Hey, no sweat. No good to go out there to work if you're just gonna freeze to death, yeah?" > You have the server bring you all a box for the leftovers, and you give those to him, too. > You stand from the stand and stretch. "Alright, my lunch is about over.  You ready to go?
"Uh, yeah." > You are still trying to sort your feelings over all of this. It's weird. It's nice. > It's what you wanted all along. > Except for the part where you are scared about Dave. > You get up too feeling like a huge fool.
> You, very very carefully, put your hand on his back and lead him out back into the cold. > Look to him, then to your car. "Back to tthe same corner? Or you got anywhere else you need to be?"
> You tense up just a little at the touch but let it happen anyways. "Y-yeah same place." > You just get into the car quickly to cut off the awkward moment. Not without putting on your seatbelt of course.
> Always seatbelt first, kid! > You buckle in and drive him back to the street corner you found him on, putting the car into park but not getting out. "Alright.  Don't get into any trouble, alright?  Oh, and patrol comes past here in about 30 minutes, so be cool when they pass, yeah?"
"Oh uh..Okay. See you, I guess." > You wave an awkward goodbye, overwhelmed by a lot of conflicting emotions.
> You're about to drive off, but then you open the door and, hanging halfway out, you call to him, "Hey! Love you, Sock."
> That just leaves you starring for a moment. Did he just-? Does he? What. Can not compute. "L-Love you too Bro..." > You are not sure if he heard that with the way you mumbled that. You are not sure if you want him to or not. > It's only getting weirder. > But it also warms your birdy little heart.
> You heard it--you've actually got pretty good hearing still, despite all tthatt music and shit. > You smile and wave again before ducking back into your car and driving off.
> The patrol driving by half an hour later doesn't find a drug dealer, just a crying kid in some back alley. > This absolutely kills the bird.
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