#and im pretty sure my sister resents the fact that our mom was always in my life but not hers

[bimyself06]

When two dogs have more of an emotional impact on your life than any other person including your own parents and siblings. One which had been with you since practically birth died from an infected wound due to some stupid teenagers when you were hours away from him. A year or two later you get a dog that's the same breed but female and you become attached to each other and when you move countries you have to leave her behind but you both become depressed to the point that she died and you were like nine at time and lowkey contemplated suicide bc of that.

And the reason you always nag and beg for cat instead of a dog is that your afraid of becoming attached to that dog only to be separated and have the dog die and you know you won't survive that?

And like the fact that your parents have openly said to your face they were hoping for a son and then your mom tells you you were an oopsie baby, only for them to keep trying for a boy but by the time they had a fourth daughter they stopped because apparently if God wanted to give a son he would have already.

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom season 2, ep 12-16 thoughts! these episodes, in comparison to the first 10 or so, felt way more laid back and low-stakes, which I appreciate sometimes. I didn't appreciate how lazy jack's halfa design was in masters of time, it made me so annoyed I redesigned it. 👎🏻 u_u

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-'picking a fight with me and my upgraded form!' 'you upgraded to a mullet?' DANNNNY. YOU CANT SAY THAT TO TECHNUS. YOUVE HAD A MULLET TWICE NOW ('fun' split danny, and evil future danny BOTH HAD THEM). I HAVE THE RECEIPTS.

-danny seeing technus hurting valerie and yelling I AM GOING TO BREAK YOU IN HALF. SAMEEEE <3

-axion labs is now a part of vladco. FUCK YOU VLAD. hes not even really IN this episode, but just thought I'd throw out a nice fuck you anyway.

-'capable of blasting a single person into space in (2) minutes!' tucker. that would kill someone. i mean yeah they might get to space, but theres NO WAY THEY WOULDNT CATCH FIRE, OR THEIR ORGANS WOULDNT LIQUIFY BECAUSE OF THE STRAIN. THEY'D PROBABLY PASS OUT BEFORE THEN, BUT. ...no, okay, I get why vlad bought this company. this is RIGHT up his alley.

-danny KNOWS VAL DIDNT DO THIS, THAT SOMEONE STOLE THE SUIT. AND SPENDING ALL NIGHT CHATTING WITH HER. <3 and val is a 9TH DEGREE BLACKBELT?? danny's mom is, too!! omg and she hunts ghosts, his parents would love her. and her fav fruit is kumquat bc its a funny word. im so with danny val is amazing. I love her and I Do Not Want To Hear It From Sam.

-I knew danny wanted to be an astronaut, but the bowling tidbit is like. yes give me more useless info abt these characters, I love tiny details that make them feel more human, and im glad hes got hobbies aside from ghost stuff, we dont really see a lot of that!!! (I mean, we knew 'fun' danny from when he split himself in half liked bowling, so obv it makes sense he LIKES it, but hes very GOOD at it. so proud of him, bowling king) val calling him neil armstrong and them teasing each other. LOVE THAT.

-technus you are my favorite grandpa for setting this up. SAM WHY ARE YOU BEING SO CREEPY BE HAPPY FOR YOUR FRIEND!!! STOP SPYING ON THEM!!! who actually cares if technus did 'set them up' together, theyre having fun and enjoy each others company!!! 'you think the universe wants you two to be together?' 'i dunno, but maybe /I/ do!' EXACTLY DANNY!!! SOO TRUE.

-and valerie being happy sam said she wants to try and be happy for them and make room at the lunch table for them. and hugging sam over it. VAL NEEDS MORE FRIENDS.

-VAL GOING AFTER TECHNUS IN HER SUIT WITH (1) MILK, AND (1) TREE BRANCH AND KEYS!!!. I LOVE YOUUUU BEST GIRL. her new suit kicks ass

-dannys like 'HEY IM AN ASTRONAUT :D' AW. ...HES IN SPACE... the fact he's actually intending to give her the ring. with SAMS NAME ON IT?? IM CRINGING DANNY NO. YOU CANT DO THAT...thank god he didnt. thank god valerie cut it off and said they can just stay friends for now. tbh, they both have a lot on their plates!! they obv both still like each other...it can be a future thing!! when she knows about phantom! youre 14 theres no need to rush. I just want her to have friends and be happy :(

-...danny struggles to do (1) pull up. SAME. but all the ghost fighting in phantom form REALLY doesnt carry over at ALL? that sucks

-sam being as fit as she is, is not just a goth. shes a goth jock.

-honey I Shrank Our Kid, One of his Enemies, and his Bully: the episode

-dash's crush on phantom is So Obvious. fitness buddies :) watching them interact always makes me laugh. also, phantom, with PANTS. 'how many costume changes you gonna go through, what is this, vegas??' DASSH DJKSFHASKDF

-MADDIE GOING AFTER THE MOUSE WITH A BROOM, WHAT THE FUCK. AAAH. JUST BUY SOME KIND OF MOUSE TRAP.

-danny likes lime and vinegar chips. which sound very good.

-'our boy finally has the physical prowess of a 60 year old president!' ...poor danny LMAO

-'what's wrong with beauty pageants' oh tucker you sweet naïve child. what ISNT wrong with them. who approved this for a high school?? (I mean, yes. unfortunately child pageants exist, but...) also danny and tucker once again treating the pretty girls like objects. I need to meet the grown man who wrote this, I just want to talk...

-prince aragon's dragon form reminds me of maleficent (color scheme wise) which is always a bonus. considering the episode is called beauty marked, I feel like the sleeping beauty references are deliberate

-sam with the fake fangs. once again her accessories never miss. hate the 'not like other girls, girls who get sucked into this kind of thing are all shallow and all want to be carbon copies' bs tho.

-sam trying to be the Worst Bride, being rude as shit. DORA IS GOING TO GET KILLED. DID YOU MISS THE PART WHERE SHE SAID THE PRINCE WILL HAVE HER HEAD IF YOU ARENT THE IDEAL BRIDE. YOU /KNOW/ DANNY WILL COME SAVE YOU. JUST ACT CHILL UNTIL THEN. even if you were doing fine to get him to take off the crown, consider maybe not letting his poor sister get punished also?? sure, she could also take off the crown and has dragon powers, but did you know that for sure?? dora didnt even really realize it until you guys talked!! (or at least, she was scared to stand up to him. you had no guarantee she would...) but. good for dora. ANOTHER friendly ghost to add to the List :)

-tucker is so under appreciated in his time. if he was doing a tech-based campaign today he'd have a better shot. people in 2004 had NO IDEA how much tech would be a part of our day-to-day lives...altho. tbh if you're going to be running for student council president, maybe you should..focus on things to actually improve the school? since he's going for a tech angle, he could say like, he would be running fundraisers for the schools computers to be upgraded, etc? we've already SEEN he can be good at money-making entrepreneur type stuff!!

-oh my god wait. this episode is JUST YUGIOH?????! A REBORN PHAROH USING A TEENAGER AS A VESSEL?? YESSSSSS

-tucker using his new minion to feed him grapes and carry him. AND LOCUSTS ONTO THE BULLIES. I love how when he's possessed, he gains winged eyeliner.

-this episode is giving me big 'plankton makes everyone in bikini bottom his slaves and build monuments of him from the spongebob movie' vibes. and the pharaoh has a traitor who works for him? VERY big yugioh vibes. aknadin confirmed

-I like that danny is still completely exhausted after using ghostly wail. (still patiently waiting on him to get duplication)

-LOVE the fenton's 80s outfits. I get hes 14 and embarrassed by everything they do because theyre his parents, but. cmon, this is one objectively cool thing theyve done. love 80s fashion.

-...was vlad just standing on that streetlight waiting for danny to come out? how'd he know they'd be coming out the back? how long has he been up there???

-oh, wait, his ecto-acne has flareups? that SUCKS. danny was...well I dont want to say he was LUCKY HE HALF-DIED, but he was lucky his was pretty instant (I'm assuming that had to do with the power/scale of the portals being different?) I remember in the ep we met him, vlad made a point of saying he was stuck in a hospital for a long time, so. that really actually sucks and I feel bad. not that it excuses anything he's done...but like. it does suck.

-vlad being so sure danny wouldnt help him he made it somehow contagious to his friends to make sure he'd get help? danny is a nice boy, he wouldve helped if it was anyone else. the only reason he wouldn't have is because of the shit vlad did to him, on purpose. vlad 100% dug his own grave by being the biggest asshole, so it is very hard to feel bad for him.

-clockwork is back!!! and making danny learn lessons The Hard Way. Uhhh, okay. I kind of get Danny’s logic, that time traveling this far back would prevent vlad from becoming a halfa also, ergo no arch nemesis or ectoacne to worry about. But the fact that was basically the first solution Danny came up with to solve this problem is actually so funny. It’s so extreme

-APPRICIATION FOR THESE 80S LESBIAN BG CHARACTERS.

-vlad telling maddie in the lab (in the 80s) he has something he's wanted to tell her 'for a long time'...how long have they known each other? I assumed they met in college, since jack always calls vlad his college buddy/roommate, so jack and vlad for sure met in college, but did vlad know maddie longer? thats surprising if so. Tho we don’t know what year of college they’re in so they could mean they met as freshmen and a few years have past…speaking of maddie shes crushing the 80s look.

-vlad blames jack, but. maybe dont stick your face 2 inches from the portal??! THIS FEELS LIKE LAB SAFETY BASICS. IF SOMETHING HAS POTENTIAL TO BE DANGEROUS, DONT GET NEAR IT. WITH YOUR FACE UNPROTECTED IN ANY WAY. (altho jack didnt really give a Big Warning besides screaming BONZAI. so. also that, but cmon.) also, they need gloves, goggles, and to pull all of their hair back tbh. but fuck lab safety, I guess!

-cryyyyinnng at how lazy they were with jack's ghost form design, its just plasmius' design on jack!!! you couldve given him his own design!!

-there. I did that in about 10 minutes and its somehow less lazy than what made it into the show. embarrassing! better yet, I think the episode would've been better if maddie would've gotten the ectoacne. or maybe its just me, wanting to see her design! anyway. I'm sure people have already done redesigns of them both as halfas. I have to go look after I finish this watch through. Also mildly frustrated jacks resentment and bitterness is basically also a copy paste of vlads backstory. They’re different characters, I really don’t think jack would stew in bitterness and jealousy the same way vlad would!! I also don’t think he’d give up after one time of trying to hunt ghosts and getting laughed at. Our canon timeline says different…I dunno, I get it was for laughs, but I’m annoyed because the POTENTIAL this plot has…

-did vlad really wear a stupid cheese hat to his wedding. ok actually that kinda rules. and the cheese door knocker. the dairy-only buffet table. vlad still got rich, just on being the New Dairy King. (Assuming that means he owns a lot of dairy businesses?) ok! this actually is great. hope maddie isn't lactose intolerant!

-'no matter how hard I tried, I could never get rid of my ghost half, the half I knew Maddie could never accept' ohh, ouch, what a horrible thing to say to her HALF GHOST SON. 'YOUR MOM WILL NEVER ACCEPT YOU' BASICALLY.

-maddie strapping danny to the table with a lazer pointed at him in a secret lab she keeps from vlad that she makes a point of saying is sound proof so he can scream all he wants...CHRIST. DANNYS POOR PYSCHE.

-also, not to feel bad for alternate vlad (because, he did lie to maddie saying jack blames her and never wants to see her again...) but. being married to a woman 20+ years and she immediately goes back to jack? if she didnt love vlad and feels like she had to hide shit from him, and says she wasted her best years with him, WHY MARRY HIM. it feels like leading him on!!! cannot believe im feeling bad for vlad, but. this alternate timeline vlad is significantly Less Horrible than Our Vlad. did she not think she'd get funding for her ghost stuff? (which, fair assumption since they're considered 'ghost fanatics/nuts in canon...but...) why did she think jack or vlad would be her ONLY OPTIONS? be like your sister. be single. Actually, this au could’ve been really interesting if after the accident, vlad lied to her and said jack never wanted to see her again, but she stays single. Imagine how much that would bug vlad… like, in her mind, it was never a competition it was jack or no one type situation…

-danny being like 'leave him ALONE' this jack is a HOMEWRECKER, DANNY. let them go to court and settle this at the least. ...or just throw vlad into the portal. (100% human, defenseless vlad) CHRIST, MADDIE THATS BRUTAL. THATS MURDER.

-danny seeing his mom immediately accepting him and his dad being half ghosts in this universe, if I was him this would be a great sign that his universe's maddie would also.

-*maddie voice* "clockwork will help!" *2 seconds later, with clockwork* "I will Not Help." TOUGH LOVE KING. YES LET DANNY SEE THE SODA HIMSELF AND DEVOLP BETTER OBSERVATION SKILLS.

-when clockwork ""reset time to the way it was"" just before danny "meddled"" ...did he really erase a whole alternate timeline? ...damn. because maddie and danny both called it an alternate timeline by name, it splitting when the college incident went different, so it wouldnt have really mattered if he reset it, right. like because danny's timeline is on a different stream? why didnt clockwork just. show danny a replay and not Reset That Timeline. wh...I wonder how many people that Erased From Existence. Anyway! once again stating clockwork is casually terrifying!

[bitchronan]

Sun-Struck

Millicent/Ginny

Non-magical, college, texting AU

Warning for language & alcohol use

ao3

Tuesday, 11:04

Pansy to what was our group chat name again: Millie.. what was that?

Millicent: what was what?

Pansy: you just walked into a tree?

Millicent: I literally did not

Pansy: idk how else to say this .. yes you did

Blaise: hate to agree w/ pansy but I also bore witness

Millicent: ur all dirty fucking liars

Tracey: Ginny weasley just walked past

Tracey: don’t worry millie I don’t think she saw

Theo: wait what????

Theo: ginny weasley!!!?????

Millicent has left the group

-

Pansy to dynamo titties: don’t think ur getting off this lightly

Millicent: why couldn’t I have better mates

Daphne: fuck right off we’re amazing

Astoria: heard you’ve got wet knickers for weasley female

Millicent: I’m blocking you all fr

-

Millicent @itsmilliebitches

for sale: shitty friend group, will poke their giant noses in ur business and leave their dirty socks on yr floor (DRACO), starting bid: $0.06 and a piece of gum

reply / retweet / like

Wednesday, 09:43

Pansy created the group weaslette recon

Pansy added Millicent to the group

Pansy added Draco to the group

Pansy added Daphne to the group

Pansy added Blaise to the group

Pansy added Astoria to the group

Draco to weaslette recon: oooo exclusive members only club

Pansy: this is serious shit

Pansy: no fucking around

Blaise: except for millie

Blaise: ba dum tss

Daphne: please never say that again

Pansy: you have all been chosen for your unique talents

Pansy: Millie obviously u have no talents ur just here bc ur the one w the mega crush

Pansy: Daph ur weird friends w potter we can use that

Millie: oh thanks

Daphne: weird friends …

Pansy: Draco ur just super nosy

Pansy: Tori u and Ronald are still ‘friends’ right?

Pansy: and blaise u just have weirdly good stalker talents

Blaise: right so why are you here?

Pansy: im the brains obviously

Astoria: obviously..

Wednesday, 12:17

Astoria to ronnie 🌸: what are you up to??

Ron to tori 🌟: just laundry you?

Astoria: you know

Astoria: I have laundry to do too

Ron: 😊

-

Blaise to draconis: you know I think the binoculars are a bit of a give away

Draco to blaze: it’s part of the look blaise

Draco: I’m committed to the aesthetic

Blaise: god ur gay

-

draco @dracodormiens

need new friends who can truly appreciate the effort I put into being the only one w/ taste or sense of style.. or a skincare routine

reply / retweet / like

Wednesday, 13:54

Draco to weaslette recon: this is what I have learnt thus far about weasley the smallest:

Draco: she literally does not own any shoes other than sneakers

Draco: which, quite frankly, is a crime

Draco: she’s a lot taller than you think she is

Draco: I would say around 5’7

Draco: bearing in mind millie that you are actually the shortest person alive

Draco: that could present issues

Draco: also she’s friends with loony lovegood which doesn’t speak highly of her taste

Astoria: okay I actually learnt something useful so I’ll go now

Draco: ‘useful’?? okay Sherlock do your worst

Astoria: Ron said she plays football Monday, Tuesday and Fridays and some weekends

Astoria: she’s on the varsity team

Astoria: she works at that coffee shop by the science building

Astoria: she loves animals and volunteers at a rescue shelter when she has the time

Astoria: he also said she’s the most annoying person alive, has no sense of personal space and always takes his shit

Astoria: seeing as he’s her brother I think this is a bit of a biased assessment

Pansy: Astoria thank you for your good work

Pansy: draco I’m doubting your usefulness to this mission

Draco: guess I’ll just die then

Wednesday: 16:02

Daphne to cilliment: ginnys at the library

Daphne: surrounded by admirers

Millicent to dangly: can u blame them

Daphne: god ur wet

Millicent: 🖕🏼

-

Millicent @itsmilliebitches

Some people are actually like the sun and everyone is just drawn to them ☀️

reply / retweet/ like

Wednesday, 19:16

Ron to grotty sibling #6: Astoria was asking a lot about you earlier

Ginny to roonil: I wouldn’t find your girlfriend asking about your family odd apart from the fact that Draco Malfoy and Blaise zabini were following me around w a pair of binoculars

Ginny: btw I bagsie letting mum down in favour of my social life this week

Ron: fuck no I already have plans

Ron: also, not my girlfriend

Ginny: not if I text her first you don’t

-

Ginny to birthgiver: mom I can’t come to dinner this weekend I have important plans

-

Ron to Mom: Can’t make dinner this weekend but Ginny will be there she has nothing on xx

-

Molly to Family: Any more of my ungrateful children want to stand me up this weekend?

Fred: now you mention it….

-

One notification [view / ignore]

Ginny Weasley @ginnyweasley like your tweet: “@itsmilliebitches: Some people are actually like the sun and…”

Thursday, 11:07

Theo to what was our group chat name again: why have we not spoken for like three days

Theo: wtf is going on??

Blaise: definitely not bc we have a new secret gc w/out you

Theo: hahaha I would rip your throat out

Pansy: :/

-

Theo to bbbbbbbBLAISE: who is in this secret group chat

Theo: ANSWER ME

Blaise to the-no: if I told you it wouldn’t be secret

Theo: you’d better sleep with one eye open fucker

-

Luna Lovegood has sent you a message request [view / ignore]

Luna Lovegood to Millicent Bulstrode: there’s a party at phi delta alpha on Saturday

Luna Lovegood: I thought you might want to come since you clearly have a massive crush on Ginny

Luna Lovegood: She’ll be there, in case that wasn’t obvious

Luna Lovegood – Add Friend / Message

-

Millicent to main group chat with everyone not secret cooler group chat: what are we all doing on Saturday

Millicent: rhetorical question we’re going to a party at pda

Draco: still the best fraternity name ever

Thursday, 14:12

Daphne to ditties (dynamo titties): anyone (millie) wanna go get coffee specifically at that place by the science building for no particular reason

Tracey: I’m down

Daphne: don’t remember inviting you but okay I guess

Millicent: how do you know she’s working today

Daphne: Penelope Clearwater from my business class is a manager there

Daphne: she showed me the rota

Millicent: on what grounds??

Millicent: Hey penny can I see the staff rota for the coffee shop you manage for vague and unspecified reasons

Daphne: pretty much yeah

Daphne: slytherin

-

Tracey to ditties (dynamo titties): okay what’s everyone want?

Tracey: millie ur ordering for everyone

Tracey: millie??

Daphne: I think shes literally lovestruck

Daphne: I want an oat milk latte w vanilla syrup

Daphne: oh look there’s potter we should go sit w him and his pals

Daphne: the sister of my friend’s best mate is my crush and all that

Tracey: as the spice girls so wisely said

Tracey: if you wanna be my love you gotta get with my friends

Daphne: zigazig ah

Tracey: pray be upstanding for the mighty spice girls

Millicent: fuck off im actually about to crap myself

-

Daphne to potter: oi potter who are your pals?

Harry to daphne g: daphne, fancy seeing you here

Daphne: we have ulterior motives

Harry: should I be worried?

Daphne: ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies

-

Daphne to ditties (dynamo titties): millie whats that on your cup??

Millie: ??? what do u mean

Tracey: there’s something drawn on your cup

Tracey: it looks kind of like a sun

Daphne: why does she look like shes about to pass out?

-

Luna Lovegood invited you to the event shindig / Saturday, 21:00

Going / Maybe / Can’t go

Saturday, 19:38

Millicent to skkkkrrrr: okay I need help of the wardrobe variety big time

Pansy: omw

Millicent: id rather not look like a bdsm stripper but thanks for the offer

Pansy: don’t speak to me or my 47000 pairs of similar but slightly varied fishnets ever again

Daphne: just wear like

Daphne: clothes

Millicent: thank fuck for that idea

Millicent: fuck u all theo will help me

Pansy: if you want to look like a stressed librarian be my guest

-

Millicent to main group chat with everyone not secret cooler group chat: everyone but pansy and daphne I need help with my outfit

Draco: fishnets not on the menu then?

Pansy: I resent the implication

Theo: how about a nice sweater?

Pansy: im not saying anything

Astoria: theo it’s a party not a meeting of grammar lovers worldwide

Blaise: you’re all hopeless I must truly do everything myself

Millicent renamed the group blaise + fake friends

Blaise: I approve this message

Saturday, 22:17

Millicent to blaise + fake friends: hey

Millicent: crazy idea

Millicent: what if we /didn’t/ go

Draco: we’re here so a little late to chicken out

Millicent: who’s gonna fucking stop me

Tracey: literally all six of us

Blaise: right who wants a drink?

Pansy: I want 5 please

Pansy: oh tori there’s ur boyfriend

Astoria: are u sure u know what a boyfriend is pans

Pansy: bite me greengrass miniature

Astoria: 🙄

Draco: if you’ll all excuse me I’m going to go get blackout drunk

Theo: who said you don’t have hobbies

Daphne: come on millie I’ll hold your hand whilst you pine over weasley from afar

Saturday, 23:45

Harry to daphne g: I have ur friend

Daphne to potter: is this a hostage situation?? Bc I don’t really want her back

Harry: she just did three shots of tequila then downed an unidentified drink george gave her

Daphne: definitely don’t want her back then

Harry: I think she’s gonna hurl

Daphne: oh don’t worry millie doesn’t vomit she just ruins her life through questionable decisions

Harry: ever thought that perhaps that is worse?

Daphne: but infinitely more entertaining

Harry: daph

Daphne: fine im coming

Daphne: where are you?

Harry: kitchen

-

Daphne to potter: where are you???

Harry to daphne g: she got away, im in pursuit

Daphne: what do you mean got away??

Harry: gave me the slip, did a runner, kicked me in the shin and took off running

Daphne: I hope it bruises

Daphne: youre a terrible babysitter

-

Daphne to weaslette recon: anyone seen millie?

Astoria: yea she’s with me

Daphne: is she plastered?

Astoria: she seems fine??

Astoria: we’re playing foosball w ron and ginny

Astoria: hmmm

Daphne: what??!!

Astoria: she just took her shirt off

Daphne: must’ve been slow acting

Sunday, 00:03

Draco to blaise + fake friends: are my eyes decieveing me or is millie making out w girl weasley w no top on in the middle of the living room

Blaise: unless this is a shared hallucination in which case I will be gracefully committing suicide tomorrow then yes

Tracey: dw im filming the whole thing

Daphne: maybe we should stop them before they fully have sex in front of everyone

Astoria: or millie suggests body shots

Millicent: BODDY SHPTS!!!

Astoria: oh shit

Sunday, 08:39

Daphne to millie before you ask yes you did take your top off and suck vodka out of weaslettes navel last night: not to be dramatic but I think an angry dragon has taken up residence in my head

Draco: if any of you are truly my friends you will bring me 7 mcdonalds hash browns and 5 advil

Draco: and a coffee

Pansy: already omw to mcdonalds

Pansy: anyone else want anything?

Blaise: you could see if they’ve got millie’s dignity laying around

Pansy: doubtful

Pansy: recon in draco’s room in 15

Pansy: those of you who are alive

-

Daphne to cilliment: [Attachment: 1 image]

Daphne: a hashbrown or 9 to wash away the shame

Millicent to dangly: I’m literally dropping out and going home

Daphne: you kicked harry in the shin

Millicent: he probably deserved it

Sunday, 08:55

Ron to tori 🌟: so my sister and ur mate have got further than we have

Astoria to ronnie🌸: I can’t think what you mean

Ron: what are you doing today?

Astoria: trying not to die

Astoria: trying to stop Millie from killing herself

Astoria: the usual

Ron: I don’t think you need to worry about that

Ron: [Attachment: 1 image]

Astoria: omfg!!!!!!!!

-

Astoria renamed the group ginny weasley loooooooves millie

Astoria to ginny weasley loooooooves millie: [Attachment: 1 image]

Astoria: @Millie

Blaise: omg

Draco: maybe weaslette has taste after all

Tracey: :’) it’s a proud day for all of us

Pansy: if you’d worn fishnets she’d have called you mind-blowingly fuckable instead of just hot

Pansy: just stating the facts

-

Ginny Weasley – Add Friend / Message

One notification [view / ignore]

Ginny Weasley accepted your friend request

Ginny Weasley to Millicent Bulstrode: so.. I know more of your bellybutton than I do of you

Ginny Weasley: but what I do know I like

Sunday, 09:27

Astoria to ronnie 🌸: so where are we going tomorrow?

Ron to tori 🌟: tomorrow?

Astoria: on our first date

Wednesday, 13:48

Ginny to birthgiver: about Saturday

Molly to Ginny: You’re not getting out of it this week. I haven’t seen you in almost 3 weeks now.

Ginny: actually I was going to ask if I could bring my girlfriend

[swayinghummingbirds]

i feel like i need to blog more stuff out of me to research my own thoughts ignore me or help me either is welcomed. 

so like i was diagnosed with mdd , panic/anxiety disorder so i know how it goes and how it feels and all that jazz. used to be on medication and not for almost two years. i can usually cope well since while i was on medication ifound many ways to do so. but now ive come across season affective disorder and i gotta say i am not a fucking fan. i cant bring myself to do the coping mechanisms because im fucking cold and there is no sun ever.  

this time last year i felt the exact same way and almost moved back to fl but didnt want to give up on tn yet. but im wondering is it maybe time to give up on it? i have no family here. and my family is expanding and growing without me. which makes it worse. 

ive been where i am for almost a year now and its been good. but there are no sidewalks like anywhere? im so tired of sharing walls. sure, its a townhouse and its pretty big and two floors and fire place but my neighbors are so annoying and for some reason in tennessee so many people think its absolutely okay to let their dogs out with leashes? 

knoxville is a really cool city and ive loved living here but idk if i can stand the winter. and its just a mild winter, idk how yall in the north handle it. i see now why when i moved abck to pa for 8 months my mom had it by the time march came around and we moved back to fl. 

a part of me feels like i might even just get bored with where i am after a certain amount of time considering how i was brought up. i have moved 17 times, which is wild for a child. probably why i have a hard time making friends too. 

tried leaving work yesterday after i got my list done (usually isnt a problem for my manager but the ass. manager always fights me with it). i told him three times i already had 2 1/2 hours of overtime and ill be leaving when im finished but bitch never listens to me and acts like he didnt hear me say it to his damn face.Usually i ask just to be polite and make sure but this time im telling him. kind of snapped on him because the day before i just cried all fucking day and had that feeling in my stomach and felt the same way when i woke up. old me would have called out, one because the position i was in was easily fillable but now im actually needed so i go to do my job and if i get done early that means im working my ass off and sweating like a pig to get done three hours early. (and the girl who does the work on the two days im off never gets the shit down or sets the room or anything up in order to have a good morning because the whole thing is very time sensitive and its very frustrating. also she called out like three times this week and made my week shittier than it needed to be.) like bitch no that doesnt mean i want to stay and help with other things after exerting so much energy that i dont even have in myself to begin with. so anyways i cried and then the manager came and talked to me and was understanding because he is aware of my mental health issues and i forgot steve- the ass manager (assistant manager , but also ass because he can be an ass) was not aware. so all in all i talked to my manager and told him and he was very supportive and then i went to apologize to steve and he reassured me i was valued and adored here which was nice. and i had to basically tell him if im trying to leave early it usually means because im feeling like a crazy bitch whos on the break of a mental breakdown so. quit fighting me. 

so anyways. 

even if i did move back fl ive finally gotten myself where i wanted to be in my job but i guess if it was meant to be the universe will take care of it just like it did when we moved here. 

a week before almost moving back to fl my grandparents came to visit and we were in crossville, which is the half way point from here to where we were living at the time and i was like hey lets try knoxville and the next day we went to look at apartments and as we were looking this place went up for rent almost as if the universe here, ask and you shall receive. because i was only looking at places that was in between the three stores that we could have possibly transferred to because i had no idea which one it was going to be i just new it was going to happen. and then when trying to transfer we my fiancees assistant manager knew the manager at this store here and said that he would take both of us and needed help in the area i wanted to be in and i was like wow amazing its all working out. and it did and it was great and then it got cold. and then holidays came. and birthdays came. and i ive learned so much about myself and i feel like yes i needed this part of my life. and now im not sure if istill need it. 

we have a vision of owning a little home a nice big plot of land near the mountains with a spring and creek on site with woods around. if we kept it up and really searched when the time came yeah im feel like we could find it. but what if i still feel this way when were there? then weve bought a home and it would be harder to get rid of. i have a vision of my own business with yoga. i find myself in capable of moving between the months of decemeber and march. then what. even when i get on to the mat i cant get into the flow. 

and what if we move back to fl. would he resent me for giving up on our dreams? will i be tired of people demanding my time and energy? will i bitch about the heat all the time and the fact that neighbros are every where? probably, yes, yes, and yes. 

but will i resent him for not moving back to spend our lives with our families? will i resent myself for not listening to the feeling in my stomach? or would i resent myself if i did listen to that feeling and gave up on the mountainous dreams. 

i know we would welcomed back with opened arms and i know not many would miss us here. 

the mountains are beautiful and so mystical when there. i wonder how it would be to live there. i always end up feeling so creeped out at some point of hikes because i feel like something is watching us, and i know there is, there is always is whether its and animal or a spirit. but sometimes those spirits, or beings, are just so strong of a force. what if we bought a property with one of those that wouldnt be able to make peace with us? i always imagined if we ended up with a property with strong entities then we would make peace and ring singing bowls and plant luscious plants for them. but what if they hate it all. and what if our neighbors down the street end up being cannabilistic cult people? what if some animal tried to maul my dog (which already happens frequently, shes a chihuahua everything is out to get her). what if something happens at oak ridge? i had no idea i was living next to a giant nuclear power plant thing. 

but then its like okay what if theres a giant hurricane that tears my house down (i had a tree fall on my house during matthew which is one reason why we left) or the storm sturge sweeps my house away. trey is scared of tsunamis, not that one has happened there probably ever, idk but it is a weird fear of his. surprisingly tornados do happen in tn too. 

and a day like today, where trey is working all day and i have the day off. there isnt much to do. its cold out so i cant sit on my patio for a few hours like i would in the summer. i dont like to go shopping. i dont have a friend to hang out with, which is my own fault people im really not a big people person. i have hung out with a couple a few tiems, and idk ij ust would rather not. but if i were in fl i could go hang out with my brother, or treys sister, or the few friends i have there. or go to the beach and sit on my own, because its not fucking weird to sit alone there and usually you dont have to worry about getting mugged. i cant go to the parks here on my own. i cant take my dog for walks around here because there are no side walks and people just look shady af everywhere. 

when i went to visit for my brothers wedding in october i realized how i did not appriciate the plant life naturally around all year round when i lived there for 11 years. i guess mostly because it wasnt until two years ago that i really got in to plants but omg i cant stop imagining what our yard would look like if we were in aplace where things could just be outside all year round. i would take cuttings of my plants andjust put them every where have my own little tropical paradise in my front and back yard. 

i know this all is really sounding one sided atm but this time last year i was having the exact same visions and the exact same thoughts. and i thought about how what if my brother has kids and im up here well hello here we are now and thats happening. i feel like i need to be there. theres even a house for sale on the same street as him and all i could was fantasize what i would do to the house and how i would baby sit for them and be able to see my dog that i left with him because ultimately she was is but we co owned her together and just to be there. and be with my mom. shes living in orland with her boyfriend and i feel like the fact shes goingt o be a grandmother might sway him into moving closer, she hates the city and i imagine shes just as depressed as i am to be away and to be in a city where you dont feel safe to go outside alone. we are creatures of nature and both pisces and very sensitive to everything. 

and what if trey and i have a baby at some point? we have no one here to help us. i was thinkg about how our wedding date is a year and like two months away and i have no one here to help me plan. and for a long itme i always imagined myself getting married at this place called sugar mill gardens, a botanical garden that i had always loved in my home town there. when trey and i got together we would pokemon go there and take clippings, and i still have those plants today. but then this new vision came where we would get married on our future property. i feel like we are still a long way away from buying a house here though. idk if we would be there in time. and since we went back in october all i can think about is getting married in sugar mill. he reproposed to me when we were there and that was so sweet and just made me want to be there instead for it. 

this is very long but these are my constant thoughts that all happen at once and it feels nice to get them out to piece them together and not feel so overwhelmed with all them at one time in layers upon layers of thoughts. sometimes my vision even goes out and i dissociate and just work blurred vision cross eyed for ten minutes, who knows maybe its an hour. im back there by myself for eight hours a day idk. 

[nofeelingsandallthefeelings]

actual reflection lmao

nov 6.2019.$$ coming i can feel it

-Mind & Mentality -thoughts, feelings, triggers, patterns

oh the everlasting up and downs, i cant decide or know what is actually going on in this brain of mine. how frustrating. In the past few months i havent been to conscious of my thoughts or feelings if im being honest. which is something im currently working on. 

on mentality, i realized i complain and talk shit alot and that im a perfectionist. we’re not judging here but we are changing. 

-Health/substance use/drink

eh i love pills, but i also love being sober. i went ham on xans in the past few times, probs why i dont remember anything that happened the first half of the semester. anyways, ive had the debate in my head about the mental dependancy so yeah.

-Self Esteem

yeah, emotionally being mature is hard. looking at social media was not a good move for me, i  questioned my beauty so many times after looking at that post. i have also in the past few months have had image issues, im still trying to figure out where these came from, i think mostly bc most if not all of my friends are skinny. 

-Finances/Wealth $$

ugh. i spent way too much on dumb ass shit, i learned i need to manage my money better and change my perspective/relationship on money. i am abundant and have always been taken care of in the past months. 

-Hobbies

-Emotions - anger, frustration, happy, sad, joyous, react vs. respond

-Work -

-Romance -

shawn and i relationship was extremely complex and messed up in so many ways, i met him at the wrong time and i feel strongly in my heart we were supposed to meet in this life. for now, we dont speak. I was mean to him and he would diminish me. Taking me back 3 times showed a lack of respect for himself and his self worth, and it showed how cruel i could be. its indescribable and im not sure what to call it. i loved and still love him and hate him equally. but i made the right choice by sending him the letter to let me be and grow. That was the best decision. i let you go with love. i had so much resentment and bitterness towards him that was not healthy for me, like holy shit. not okay. but i forgive myself and let go with love

dog boy, oh what an obsession. it was lust, lust, lust. I have to be very careful. I went 100000 full throttle on this in my mind. we had almost nothing in common, he was pretty boring, yet i continued to lead him on for ego’s sake, it was my choice to let him go out of the circle to focus on myself and it was also another great decision i made!! In retrospect, i should have spoken up for what I wanted because I had every right to, i went to ny to see him god damn it. but also in retrospect there is no way any romantic relationship wouldve been picked up as i am living my life. i keep the door slightly open with this one, tiniest crack. the obsession was a mess, it was messing with me every single day, that is ridiculous. the things i did and said to try to make this work was silly. i forgive myself and let this go with love. 

watch my lust, 9/10 its lust  

-Spirituality- affirmations, prayers, meditations

i have been out of touch with my spirituality and i feel like thats something that does keep me grounded ina weird sense. 

-Family-mom/sister nan and tio

being around tio meme and nancy, makes me so comfortable and makes me feel at home. In the past 3 months i feel like i have bonded with them significantly and with emily too. they are my rock. as far as my immediate family, i love them but i cannot be around them. the semi fight on my bday was so much, i think we all just misunderstand each other and after years of chaos, we dont know how to communicate with one another. I also realized in the past few months, i do in fact want a family of my own, we can leave this vague bc its just an idea. 

-Career

is my passion. end of story. we in that hoe baby

-Social Life/friendships

july, jac gossiping on me. to be honest, i should have seen this coming, but i didnt pay attention, she was pretty manipulative with other people and good at it, kudos. very artistic and creative. I still cant tell if our friendship was real or out of convenience and even worse, im hurt she moved on w that girl as friends so fast!!!  Lesson: don’t trust your friends with secrets and smell out the snake in them, it shows

in the past few months, i havent been keen on going out in large crowds, I am not sure why, its too many people? 

my new friends are great, i am happy i made the steps and efforts to develop friendships with arabella and alana. they are great inspirations and supports into becoming the woman i want to be and will be. we’re alll very different and similar and i like that, i like that they challenge me to think outside of my box. i have enjoyed and immersed myself in feminine energy. 

i love alex. we went through so much in the end of LA, i learned alot about myself as a friend and continue to do so

briney i love briney, she keeps me afloat and hopefully i do the same. our relationship in the past months has strengthened. 

and lastly i realized i care too much about what people think which is so dumb but we’re working on it. no judging 

lesson: Be grateful and prioritize quality time with those i love and cherish 

-Lifestyle

idk if this goes under this category, but i realllly realllyyyyyy played myself this last semester with my priorities, i cant even recall what i did the first half of my semester. I learned it causes me stress and we take preventative steps here at shuco inc. 

THERES SO MUCH MORE BUT I WILL CONTINUE LATER