#and im also sorry if this comes off insensitive or ''i have it SO hard'' i dont mean to be like that

[medicasino]

ive just accepted im just never going to fit cleanly into any label or community ever

[qingxintea]

the stars intertwine *ੈ✩‧₊˚

genshin impact

headcanons — aether, xiao, scaramouche

when you tell them you feel alone

AETHER ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

immediately, aether seemed to pick up on your mood. usually he wasn’t very exposed to you feeling down as you kept onto an upbeat show even if it didnt correspond to how you were truly feeling.

deeming the fact that you let it show this time to a point where he could genuinely pick it up, he determined it must’ve reached a bad point. he asked you about it.

“y/n? im sorry if this sounds weird— i just think that you seem a little down today. are you okay?”

he looked at you with the utmost concern and it almost pushed you into crying more. kinda like trying to not cry at school but someone asks “are you okay?” and u cry fr

“yeah— sorry,” you immediately apologize, feeling bad that you made him worry.

“nono, please don’t apologize; just tell me what’s wrong if thats okay,” he smiles gently and takes your hands

you stare intently for some seconds and then take a deep breath. “i just feel a little lonely.”

silence sits for a second but you could feel his hands tense a bit around yours.

finally, he speaks (:

“i’m sorry if i failed you accompany you today,” he blurts out in a rush, feeling responsible for your mood. “d-“

“what? no, aether,” you shake your head, “this is not your fault at all. its just one of those days. thats all.” you smile in reassurance.

he sighs gladly knowing that he was not involved in the issue. he knows about days where you simply just felt down— he had them all the time when he was finding his sister ):

he caresses your face and comes to a conclusion.

“then lets be alone together.”

skips his commissions and takes sick leave and spends the rest of the day never leaving your side

you tell him all about your week!

“work at liyue qixing is very busy this week, we had a lot of broken architect and paranormal cases as of lately. ganyu and keqing always work so hard so i took these extra cases for them.”

“i spent more energy than usual and spent less time talking to people i love, talking to you. everytime i return from work, i just sort of collapse.”

aether chimes in, “y/n, you’re so sweet to everyone. from now on i will rest with you when you return.”

and he does! aether always keeps his word to you— you really are thankful for him.

he even goes out of his way to solve cases and fix things for you while you’re sleeping and you never notice him sneaking out. he talks to little ming and asks her if she knows anything behind the cases, fixes broken stairs and elevators, and ultimately asking keqing and ganyu to look out of you as you’ve been passing out lately.

he even crocheted you a little aether plushie to hold whenever he’s not around! so you’ll always have a piece of him with you (:

on the weekly, he gets you flowers. this week he got you a bouquet of cecilias so you don’t suspect he’s been working in liyue for you

the next week, when you tell him that your workload in liyue has been elevated, he is extremely glad that his work paid off. of course, he never tells you anything though

cutie fr

XIAO ·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳

xiao cant really verbally address feelings well and you know this. so initially you avoid telling him in general.

but he’s not oblivious to it— even though you don’t tell him, he can sense it. like that one time you made an extremely outrageous deal with a witch to take on his karmic debt and almost died LOL crazy

you also don’t tell him bc yk he’s lived for so many years longer than u that he’s lost so many people, probably more lonely than u

he can sense it through some of your usual offerings too! your cooking is corresponding to your mood and the almond tofu recently has been a bit bitter compared to your previous. its not that it tastes bad, it aroused concern.

he is scared to address it because he thinks he will be extremely awkward or insensitive. instead, he comforts you through acts of service and gift giving.

he picks up qingxin flowers for you and ties it with a vibrant red silk ribbon and leaves it on your doorstep. also gets u a green good luck amulet

now u have it on your nightstand and it helps u sleep better, the good luck amulet is always warn next to your vision YAY

he notices an improvement in your mood but it’s not to its original state.

eventually, he appears the next time you offer something and the two of you sit in comfortable silence until you break it.

“i’m sorry my offerings have been of lower quality recently. i am not feeling well and it shows through my work,” you apologize profusely. you think that him staying with you is a sign that he’s waiting for you to say something about recent troubles bc u always overthink LMAO

“don’t say sorry for something so minuscule,” he immediately responds but has no idea what to say after that.

but there is no need to add on because you know him so well. you know that when he says that it means he is more concerned about your well being than what you produce.

you nod slightly and the conversation ends there. he probably already realizes that you’ve been feeling lonely because you’ve been lacking in social energy this whole week due to your excessive work.

he stays with you for awhile and never gets up to get milk from the fridge or anything which is great

lowkey threatens your coworkers to keep an eye on you LMAOO so silly

SCARAMOUCHE ༄ؘ ۪۪۫۫ ▹▫◃ ۪۪۫۫ ༄ؘ

mention of medications and more sweating LMFAO

lowkey u just expect this guy to not care at all bc he’s emotionally constipated

BUT HE DOES HE JUST DOESNT SHOW IT BC HES SCARED HIS COWORKERS MIGHT MAKE FUN OF HIM FOR SHOWING EMOTION

so when he addresses it he makes sure ur in a completely ISOLATED SPACE so NO ONE FUCKING SPIES !!

“oookay, what the fuck is wrong with you y/n, have you not been taking your meds for the past month??”

LMAO he says it downright with no sugarcoat because he wants to get straight to the point

you get taken aback a bit bc it’s such a funny question

“no bitch i just feel like SHIT TODAY because im LONELY AND SINGLE 😭😭😭😭” you counter

“hoe, you are NOT SINGLE WE R LITERALLY DATING STUPID ASS”

“oh i forgot”

“r u fr.”

he brings u ur meds in like 2 pound crates and ur like “wtf”

he says it’s to compromise for your lack of meds the past month

“DUDE IVE BEEN TAKING THEM TODAYS JUST A CRAPPY DAY LMAO AND THATNIS NOT HOW IT WORKS????”

“??,??!!” he is so done HAHAHA “anyway why r u lonely wtf did tartar sauce say something mean to you AGAIN”

you laugh “ACTUALLY YEAH LOL HE WAS LIKE ‘at least i have a little brother’ AS A JOKE CUZ HE DOESNT KNOW THAT MINE WENT KABOOM 😵😵”

“BITCH U GOTTA TELL HIM SOON”

“SHUT UP”

the two of u end up playing super smash bros and u keep spamming villager rocket bc that’s ur favorite move and eventually u k.o. him with it even though he saw it coming, he forgot how to jump LMAO

he claims that he did that on purpose to make you feel better but u think he’s bs-ing because he’s a sore loser and embarrassed he lost by not dodging a whole ROCKET

“UNFAIR”

“LOSER”

eventually becomes a very heated roasting session because u two are the most toxic couple in all of teyvat that ur literally perfect for each other LMAO

“how does it feel to look 12 and 57 at the same time??? I BET U GET ID CHECKED AT 7LEAVES LMAO”

“PEOPLE ONLY NOTICE U WHEN U BECOME A PROBLEM”

“U LOOK LIKE A PURPLE BLOOD CLOT”

“COVID SWIPED LEFT ON YOU. FUCKING COVID”

“THE ONLY REASON YOU HAVENT DIED YET IS BC THE ARCHONS SAID ‘FUCK NO LEAVE HIM BACK ON TEYVAT OH MY GOD’”

no lonely anymore bc ur evil !

later when u don’t know he beats up childe for what he said LMAO “ARE U STUPID DONT BRING Y/N’S CRAPPY CRUMBLED FAMILY INTO ANYTHING” and childe never does it again

happy ending !

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

QINGXINTEA ONE YEAR RESSURECTION SO REAL

LIVE LAUGH AETHER

[9w1ft]

I'm so upset. I need to pull back. It probably shouldn't be a big deal but I went through so many emotions getting this ticket. I thought I was never going to see her in concert. But honestly. At this point. If he ends up with there at mine, I think I would leave. It would ruin the whole thing. The music is what's real, Taylor. I'm coming to support that. To support YOU. And it honestly feels like a betrayal for the masquerade to extend to that. I wish you'd have known on the ticket. I wouldn't have put my savings in it.

maybe commiserating is the correct response and i am sorry that im taking it in a different direction because i get that sometimes that’s not what someone needs but if i can impart an idea, i think that if your heart is telling you to step back then by all means honor your heart and do so—and—if you find yourself returning or wanting to return, i think there might be a way of engaging with taylor that can work for you. i think it’s important to recognize that this has been a not ideal situation for sometime but to also recognize there are still good parts in here, and by good i mean that there are ways you can personally benefit from taylor’s work that will make your life better. and if you can recognize that there are parts that won’t ever work for you, and instead capture and focus in on the good parts that do, you can still become a better version of yourself through her work.

i used the word might because i recognize that the way we engage with public figures these days is a little bit different than in the past, i think, and by that i just mean that, i think more than ever we look to the public figures that we support as if they are extensions of our own conscience. in forming our identities growing up, i think more than ever people need an intense moral alignment with every last thing we decide to say that we enjoy, and there’s so much pressure, i think, to continuously curate and express what we enjoy to an infinite audience of people, in perpetuity.

i think it’s very hard to maintain this sort of consistency in one’s consumption and it’s so much work for very little benefit, and it can all be taken away from anyone in an instant. i just don’t think it’s any way to live, especially when i think it’s possible to just… let go of some things and allow yourself to pick and choose a little bit more.

i don’t say these things to invalidate your feelings and once again i’m sorry if it comes off insensitive.. i’ve been where you are. and i just hope that maybe, with a little tinkering of the way you utilize your time with taylor, there’s a way to make it work.

also on a more practical note.. i’m not sure if you’re there tonight or an upcoming night but, save for travis walking on stage, or you having a seat directly beside VIP, you’re really not going to notice or even think about who’s there at all. i just say this because, im about as crack of a detective as it gets when it comes to this meta narrative but even i get entirely swept up in the moment and forget to take pictures or check access points or look out for celebs or check twitter. it’s a concert and you’ll have the opportunity to scream and shout to 18 years of music that mean something to you, and i think you’ll get some good stuff out of it so, if you’re on the fence i’d say go anyway. i think it’ll be worth it.

[weenwrites]

yay for attempting this crossover!! im really glad you're giving this a try, tho if you end up not liking it i understand, im just happy you're hearing me out!!!

this character is from my current favorite game: guild wars 2. he's called Trahearne, and he's a sylvari, aka sentient plant-like people! he's also a necromancer, which i think would be startling to Cybertronians when they hear he studies magic that raises the dead into his personal minions. Trahearne is a good guy tho, not evil, and he has a hard and troubling destiny ahead of him, a fate given to him since he awoke in his world.

if he were in the tfp world, trying to get back w the help of team prime, what do you suppose their opinions of him would be???

no pressure if you're not into this, but if you are, have fun!! don't worry about not knowing this fandom or game, thank youuuu

✎ A/N: Just to clarify to people OTHER than the requester, I still don't do crossovers and I don't think I ever will after this one because it was difficult for me to write. The only reason I'm making an exception for this crossover is because I decided to say "yes" to it because I wanted to give it a shot. Also anon I'm sorry it took so long for me to respond, but I tried my best with what you gave me to work with, and I hope you see it and enjoy it.

[ Please do not repost, plagiarize, or use my writing for AI! Translating my work with proper credit is acceptable, but please ask first! ]

Optimus

Despite Trahearne's disposition, Optimus wouldn't be the type of person to judge him because of it. So long as Trahearne is someone who wishes to do good, then he's willing to extend his hand to help him however he can.

He can somewhat relate with having a troubling destiny, as he is the bearer of the matrix and the leader of the autobots. The fate of two worlds are balanced upon his shoulders, and his every move may risk toppling them both. He tries to offer what bits of wisdom and knowledge he can in hopes that it will one day be of use to him.

Ratchet

He believes that the team already has enough to worry about with humans to protect and the decepticons scouring the earth, they needn't anything more to take care of on their plate. Unless Trahearne's willing to extend a hand to help Ratchet with his duties, then it's most likely that the two will have little room to interact.

But speaking of magic, Ratchet initially thinks that it's ridiculous. Magic doesn't exist, and he doesn't believe that studying it is even possible. If Trahearne's the kind of person to prove Ratchet wrong and show off his skills, then the look on Ratchet's face is something that no one will be forgetting any time soon.

Ultra Magnus

Like Ratchet, Ultra Magnus believes that effort and resources should be poured into the war effort as opposed to aiding a stranger, or at the very least form a partnership so that both sides get something out of it. Yet if he is ordered to help return Trahearne back to his world, then he'll comply without another complaint.

Smokescreen

He initially thinks that it's super cool that he has some predetermined destiny waiting for him—so long as that destiny is to do good in the world. He may come off as a little insensitive at first (especially if Trahearne's destiny is something he has complicated feelings about) but he's quick to realize any mistakes and apologize if he said something he shouldn't have.

He'd think the whole "doing magic" thing is real cool, and he'd ask all sorts of questions about it, like what can he do with magic? How does he do it? Smokescreen would even want to try learning, and if he was given the opportunity he would legitimately pour in the time and effort to do magic.

Bulkhead

Wait so if he raises the dead to do his bidding, were these undead servants people he killed or people that were already dead? And would it work on cybertronians? To Bulkhead, if he thinks long enough about zombies brought from the dead to do someone's bidding, it grows more and more disturbing. But zombies aside, if Trahearne's a good guy, then there's a chance the two of them could get along just fine.

[persephoneflouwers]

Hi Angie, i hope it is alright that im calling you Angie, this is C.

Sorry for not replying earlier, I hope you are doing good. I’m also sorry to see that you lost someone so important to you, hope you are feeling better now.

I kinda screenshotted your answer to get back to you at a more suitable time (I see that I have the best timing now that the circus is back in town like talk about that wasted time eh Harry, anyway..)

I’m sorry that the fandom evolved into a place where you (and me and I’m sure many others) are feeling bad for voicing opinions that are essentially the fundamentals of being a larrie. The way this has been happening is particularly disheartening when people accuse us of apparently not respecting their closet or blaming them for their closets, like that is some level of gaslighting and guilt tripping.

I guess the fandom became this way now because louder voices are more occupied with following the biggest popstar (their words definitely not mine) of recent years than two closeted musicians that they can see past all the bs H and his team pull to the point where them voicing all the praise and how this fuck-boy persona is a must to make it big are drowning out the reasonable judgments of many levelheaded fans that can still manage to be here.

It really makes me wonder how it would be now with H and L if the fandom could have been more open with our criticism towards their recent way of handling fame, business etc, like im not trying to attribute more importance than we deserve to us as a fandom in their lives or saying we know better than them but we experienced firsthand how they were attuned to the chatter of larry fandom, maybe some tough love is what they need to hear instead of all the coddling (especially H) they are oddly receiving mostly from this part of fandom.

Also, im not trying to sound insensitive but it feels like they are missing Jay-like figure in their lives who im firmly believing was the voice of reason for them (I dont wanna get into this too much out of respect for Jay)

I have so much respect for you (and other blogs like you) bc you guys refuse to give into pressure of following whats come to be “the truth” and still speak your truths, there is nothing off putting about that believe me, it is admirable.

Im sorry if this ask feels incoherent, if it is so, you are gonna understand why in my following ask which would be just for you.

Hello, C 🦋 it’s so comforting to read your messages every now and then. I hope life is treating you well.

I know I made myself a reputation of an hater, but I’m not. I’m just constantly pushing back whatever stupid move they make. I don’t care if it’s good for their business, it’s not worthy on a human level and I fear the day people will start prioritising job and money and commercial success.

I also understand ignoring whatever thing you don’t like is a way to cope and go through this and curate your experience, but still it won’t make it go away. It’s hard at times, especially here - I’m not particularly close to anyone here so it feels like my experience is just me speaking into the void, you know? - and in this isolation sometimes I feel like the evil character but I don’t think I am. I’m a fan like everyone else, except I am very opinionated and more often than not I don’t agree with what I see/read here and there.

But thank you for coming back. I will not post the other part II because I like that little secret between us 😌 you’ll find me here when you decide to share more of your thoughts of course <3

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[leviathans-watching]

if it isn't too much to request, could we get a more gender neutral thing with the MC being on their period? i'm on mine right now and it's been hard to find comfort writing that isn't for female readers which ESPECIALLY sucks because im. well. Not A Girl dhwhs

AH but of course you don't have to if you feel like it's too repetitive!!!

mc on their period

includes: the bothers x/& gn!reader (no pronouns mentioned)

wc: .6k | rated g | m.list

a/n: i'm sorry you're feeling this way!! i know it's a little late but i hope it helps next time it rolls around or just in general haha. thank you for requesting and i hope you enjoy!! my inbox is open to chat, req, or leave feedback so come say hello <33

warnings: vague and brief mentions of dysphoria

please like and reblog hehe

burying your face in your arms you groan, slumping down.

“what ever is the matter?” lucifer asks, and you lift up your head a little to look at him. he’s got his finger marking where he left off reading and his gaze is steady on you.

“i’m just not having a super great time right now,” you reply, semi-honestly. “life sucks.”

opposite you, belphie nods. asmo smacks him on the shoulder.

“i’m sorry you feel that way,” asmo says, a pout forming. “is it something in particular? you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

“yeah,” satan agrees. “and if there’s anything we can do for you, please let us know. we’d be happy to help.”

you smile a little, touched. “thanks, guys. it’s just, you know, that time of the month so i’m extra moody.”

everyone softens slightly at that, familiar now with your feelings about your period and all of the complicated feelings that usually arise along with it.

“that sucks,” mammon says, normally brash tone quieter. “i know in the past chocolate and stuff has helped, do ya want any of that?”

“theoretically, yes,” you sigh. “but i’m not even close to hungry. sometimes my appetite gets screwed up.”

“so that’s why you didn’t eat much for lunch,” beel says, and mammon snorts.

“of course that’s what you’d notice.”

cutting off the potential squabble, lucifer speaks once more. “i’m very sorry you’re feeling like this. i know you don’t feel your best during menstruation but we’re all willing to do whatever you need. and if you want us to just drop the subject and not bring it up again right now, we’re more than willing to do that too.”

looking around at all of their stupidly sincere and kind expressions makes you know that what lucifer’s saying is the truth. the boys rarely agree on anything, but when it comes to you and your wellbeing, you’ve found their thinking aligns more often than not. you bury your face in your arms once more and bite your cheek.

“uh, mc?” levi says after a moment, and you hear a soft thud, followed by a quiet ‘ow’. asmo could probably reach him too.

“i’m okay,” you say. “just trying to get a handle on these stupid emotions i suddenly have. thank you, lucifer. i really appreciate it. and i’m okay with talking about it, but it was kind of you to check my boundaries.”

“of course,” lucifer replies, and a soft touch lands on your shoulder. beel, probably, since he was on that side of you. “kindness has nothing to do with it, though. it’s just basic decency.”

“that’s true.” you huff out a laugh, sitting up fully once more. beel’s hand- you’d assumed correctly -shifts but doesn't fall. you lean into the touch slightly. “but still, thank you.”

“think nothing of it,” satan cuts in. “i also wanted to add that if we ever do or say anything, not only about this, that is invalidating or insensitive to please let us know. i know i, and probably everyone here just wants to respect and love you in the way you deserve.”

“you’re all doing a great job of that, so don’t worry,” you say. “i’d say something if you weren’t, but again, thank you.”

stupid respectful boys who make your heart feel like it’s going to burst.

getting your period really sucks but at least you have them.

leviathans-watching's work - please do not copy, repost, or claim as your own

[idiashrub]

Is it insensitive for me to say? - Idia Shroud

Idia fails to keep his promise to his little brother and is now feeling like the biggest disappointment there ever is; (Y/n) is there to be the 'somebody' he refuses to admit that he needs.

important note(s): This takes place after the events in Idia's robe personal story! // contains very subtle implications of ch6 (nothing detailed or specific) // (Y/n) is Yuu —she/her— is also implied to have been transported to Twisted Wonderland a year earlier, so she's the same year as the second years.

a/n: This has been sitting in my drafts for a while now, so why not post it here? May this be my official debut in the twst writing community here on tumblr! Hope you'll like it! <3

word count: 2.6k

Her fist gently came in contact with the door, emitting gentle knocks that echoed through the empty hallways of Ignihyde.

"Idia? It's quite late but I was hoping to see you," she called a little loudly, waiting for a response.

Minutes passed but silence was the only thing that addressed her presence. No sounds of buttons being smashed together, no raged muttering and heavy sighs of frustration to indicate loss, nor were there yelps of victory. It was complete and still silence.

Maybe he wasn't in his room? Rarely does Idia ever leave his room, but that didn't mean it didn't happen. So (Y/n) turned to look at the hallway, hoping to catch a glimpse of his familiar long flaming hair, presumably returning from a late-night stroll — a silly thought now that she thinks about it.

Ding!

The phone that rested on her pocket vibrated.

im fine

you can leave now

im better off alone <message deleted>

She pursed her lips, thinking of what to say.

"Well, sorry to say this but I'm not leaving. Come on, Idia, it's been a while since we've last properly spoken or seen each other!" her hand mindlessly tapped on the door, following a random rhythm, "I was given a short break from having to attend to everyone's needs, so might as well spend it with you!"

"…"

Nothing was going to be accomplished if things remained like this until the next couple of hours. She didn't even want to pry answers out of him, she really just wanted to see him and talk about whatever. They weren't really able to contact each other as much during break because of the part-time job (Y/n) took at this village nearby. And even as the students returned, the weeks leading up to the ceremony had been quite hectic; having to help the others, she had to cancel numerous plans she had with Idia — their supposed weekend movie nights, game tournaments, and whatnot.

She just needed to see her beloved's familiar yellow eyes. She missed joking about how the bright color contrasted his gloomy personality…

A click echoed through the silent hallway when she gently pushed the door, much to her surprise. She didn’t expect the door to be left unlocked, especially if Idia was inside, most likely feeling down.

When she continued to push it more open, the familiar interior of the dorm leader’s room came into view. There she saw the dorm leader of Ignihyde, Idia Shroud. He was lying on his bed, looking somewhat jagged and sullen with his headphones on. She wondered how he managed to hear her calls if he was wearing those headphones.

Was he even listening to anything or was it to serve to mislead those who stumble upon him looking like he was now?

From what she can see of him from the doorway, he looked even duller than usual; the small glint behind his eyes not becoming visible to her no matter how hard and long she stared. He looked saddened, disheartened…disappointed.

…Is it of himself?

Another thing she noticed was how he’s in his ceremonial robes.

So he was planning on personally attending the entrance ceremony…

“Hey,” she greeted, hoping that he wouldn’t be in an even fouler mood after she decided to proceed in his room without his permission. (Y/n) took a quick scan of the room to see if anything really changed, to distract herself as she waited for a response from him. It's pretty much the same — with his belongings scattered here and there, candy wrappers tucked within the pages of some books and as well as some laid on the floor, and prints of paperworks lazily placed on the desk and chair.

“I hope you don't mind me intruding. I was hoping we'd spend the night together, you know? Catch up, watch something, or play games…! Didn't the game you mentioned release a new update a few hours ago?"

Getting Idia to talk at this state was next to impossible.

'I won't be checking the update until a few days from now, I'm gonna wait for others to test it first to ensure there won't be any bugs. So you don't have a reason to stay, ' the sound of Idia's voice reached her ears.

When her eyes landed on his figure again, she was surprised to see him holding his tablet, his position no longer laying on the bed but instead sitting cross-legged on it.

(Y/n) didn’t even notice where he grabbed his tablet from until she heard the sound of his voice (perhaps he got it from the shelf on his bedside?). But she didn't let that fact distract her from his words.

He looked as if he's experiencing one of his darkest nights, and (Y/n) didn't want him to be alone if so.

With all her confidence, she stalked towards the direction of where he sat, taking the spot beside him. The weight of the mattress shifted as she plopped down.

There wasn't really anywhere else for her to stay, but she'll be staying anyway.

At her action, Idia's eyes widened for a millisecond before reverting to normal after taking an intake of breath silently; (Y/n) acted nonchalant with their proximity as she suggested an idea on what else they could do.

"Hm, then maybe we can watch something? Cater-senpai recommended a movie. It's about a time-traveler chasing another time-traveler who stole his family’s time machine..." She paused, eyeing Idia's sunken eyes before continuing, "or maybe we can just talk."

"T-talk? On second thought, w-we can test the new update!"

Ding!

Her phone went off the same time he finished his sentence — It was a message from the headmaster.

(Y/n) sighed at the sight of it, contemplating whether or not to respond.

Didn't he promise to let me be for the time being?

Idia watched as her lips formed a thin line. He watched as her eyes shifted from her phone to his room then to her phone again — this meant that she's debating what to do next. And as he continued to watch her and be with her, maybe spending the night with someone isn't really so bad right now?

(Y/n) had already stood up and was about to proceed back to her dormitory, where the headmaster apparently needed her, but paused when she felt a smooth, cold hand enclose hers, wrapping it with a firm but gentle grip.

He squeezed her hand gently.

"Wait! P-please stay!" I miss ranting. I miss our late-night conversations. I miss beating a game with you. I miss raging with you. I miss celebrating with you. I miss...you! This was everything he originally wanted to say, but he decided against it, "we can talk…”

After hearing his silent plea, the frown on (Y/n)'s lips shifted into a smile as she squeezed his hand back, her gaze at their hands clasped together.

And while she felt more fondness with the blue-haired introvert engulf her, Idia felt warmth trickling up to his neck. He could feel and see the tips of his long flaming blue hair turn a light shade of red. He hoped (Y/n) wouldn't notice this.

She did. But she remained silent about it, deciding to not make a big deal out of this despite wanting to tease him a bit. She didn't want for him to be too flustered, after all, else he wouldn't be able to function properly.

"So…" they both said at the same time. Their eyes quickly met each other's as their minds raced. (Y/n) found this amusing; Idia wanted to face-palm at his idiocy.

Why couldn't he start a conversation without making anything awkward? Great, now he's certain that (Y/n)'s questioning why she's even in his room with him; why she decided to be with him; why she's still holding his hand.

…holding hands?

Idia gasps, his hand immediately letting go of hers as the tips of his hair shifted to an even darker shade of red.

"S-sorry!" She's probably realizing how she doesn't even like me now! "Um…"

Why is she even with you? (Y/n) is literally a high-ranking person in terms of everything (excluding magic), plus her stats are either already maxed or nearing…

Constitution? Vil, and especially Rook, personally guide her with her routines. And on afternoon weekends, she's often seen with Rook at the sports ground.

Intellect? She's top ranking in classes despite being unfamiliar with this dimension and not possessing any type of magic!

Personality and Appearance? Everything about her never fails to leave anyone in awe.

Charisma? Anyone who comes in contact with her never forgets about her. She ends up lingering far longer than normal, and she never fails to hold anyone's interests no matter how their interests fail to meet.

Willpower? Her mental capability to handle immense pressure and stress is top-notch. The fact that she originates from another dimension only adds more to her stat…

...but she does come short in terms of luck, considering her current predicament…

But regardless, you're making a fool of yourself by being with her. You who's hopeless and a good for nothing otaku; also anti-social, socially anxious, generally awkward, cursed, gloomy, an outsider, an outcast...a liar…secretive…

You're most likely just going to stain her wonderful attributes.

Bringing nothing but disappointment…

Plus, you failed to execute the promise you made to Ortho!

Her relationship level with Ortho is at its max — the probability of a limit break is at ~99.9% — so she's most likely going to feel a wave of disappointment when she learns that you failed to keep your word to your little brother.

And Ortho…

The disappointment he must have felt…

But you did so for yours and his sake, right? Ortho wouldn't want to see his older brother embarrassing himself.

But, again, he was so excited…

The sound of fingers snapping cut his train of thought. When his eyes settled on her figure, he noticed how she now sat on the floor, leaning onto his bed as her eyes stared up at him.

"Why are you apologizing? There's nothing to be sorry for," she smiled, placing her hand on top of his as she said this, "and I told you already, nothing you do will drive me away. I'm not going to be your future history."

You wouldn't be saying that if…if you knew…

Her hand appeared smaller as it rested on top of his hand, barely covering his. Thin fingers wrapped around his, forming a grip that he can easily shake off — something he doesn't do — as his skin felt the traces of her long unsharp nails.

Her grip was calloused, but he didn't complain. He felt as if she wanted to tighten their hold, but decided against it. So he did what she didn’t.

"I didn't say anything such…" he muttered under his breath, his eyes remaining on their hands as he evading her observing eyes.

"You're right, you didn't. But I can see it in your eyes. You're beating yourself up for something you're not even doing, or for something you failed to do. It's like destroying yourself by firing off missiles of hateful words."

Every word she uttered was like a punch in the gut. Idia feels as though he was slapped by reality, her reality — the very reality he's always [wrongfully] assuming.

But how can she say that? Why does she believe such?

'There's a reason as to why she holds your intrigue; why she calls you hers and her yours!' The more rational and less anxious part of his mind tried to pinpoint.

But despite this, the cloud of anxiety and insecurity still overcame him.

She's pointing out his flaws! She's going to think of more and further push the idea of giving up every connection she shares with you. She's probably going to get fed up with you now and just end everything.

Here comes the— the ‘I’m sorry, but I don’t think being with someone like you’s good for me’ or something.

"You're speculating why I'm with you when it should be me thinking that."

...Huh?

"You know, with every negative connotation you have of yourself, whether it's something directly about you or because of your choices, it breaks me; it saddens me as much as it saddens you."

She let go of his hand for a second before taking ahold of it again, this time both of it. She held them together, her thumbs tracing circles on his pale skin.

"Idia, you’re so, so much more to me than what you think. Your fears? Struggles? Anxiety? And everything else you label as your mental baggage? I'm here to carry it with you; I'm here to listen; I'm here to help you with them; I'm here. I'm always going to try and be here. For you and for Ortho," she said, the tone of her voice lacing with nothing but complete and honest sincerity.

She's only saying that because of how pathetic you must seem...

His eyes finally met hers.

But her eyes are shining with veracity…

"You say that now but once you get to know more of me…" he trailed off, his eyes attempting to avoid hers, but they didn't.

She smiled a gentle smile, "But that's the beauty of it, isn't it? The mysteries to be uncovered! We have all the time we need to know and understand. We don't have to rush anything! And…this might sound cliché but I accept who you are and who you're going to be as we continue on! So long as you're not a serial killer or anything," she joked, chuckling at her final statement. But everything else she said was pure honesty.

She was still holding his gaze as she held his, and he genuinely didn't know what to say. The tips of his hair were now a prominent crimson and his mouth opened and closed to try and form words; he tried to respond but he kept failing.

Because normally, her words would have been something he deemed as naïve, but…it brought him some sense of comfort.

She stood from her position and took the spot next to him. Now sitting beside Idia and turning her body to face him, she let go of his hand as her right palm held his cheek, tenderly caressing it.

"Now, I don't mean to be insensitive but get your act together, alright? So I can love you without the unwanted torments of your own mind," she advised before her lips came in contact with his for a kiss— a kiss that lasted far too quickly for their liking.

Her eyes fluttered open as she pulled away, watching Idia as he did the same. They stayed like that for a few more moments, foreheads leaning onto one another as they simply stared into each other's eyes, relaying the messages of 'thank yous' and 'I love yous' with only their gazes.

But for now, it was enough. They felt comfort and fondness with each other. And the act only solidified what they're already feeling — maybe even adding more into it. They're more than looking forward to knowing about the other whilst following the steady pacing of their still blooming relationship.

It's exciting how, despite being thrown and stuck to a completely unfamiliar world, she still managed to find someone that is able to bring her comfort…

And how he also finally found the someone who he once thought was nonexistent — the someone that's willing to wait and listen then understand…

"Let me call Ortho so we can have that movie night promised."

This is a simplified version! The full version of this fic can be read on AO3 - 09/16/21

[multi-maker]

hi hi! so i just recently just found out about your blog and i LOVE your writings! may i request an albedo x reader angst to fluff about the reader thinking he likes sucrose even though he’s just asking her on how to confess to the reader? aaa im so sorry for making a complicated request 🥺💔

:000 i loved writing this so much omg aaa it broke my heart but it also mended it ?? sorry for writing this very late !! admin dawn has had a bit of a problem trying to get albedo’s personality right hehe-

also, don’t be sorry for making it very detailed! like what anemo and i put in the rules, the more detailed the request, the better!! <33

your wish is my command~!

“ i always know that you make me smile “ | a.

albedo was a strange person. he knew lots of things about the world, figuring out the unknowns and unlocking mystery after mystery. he was intelligent and polite, and can be quite excited when talking about something that interested him. he was always talking about alchemy, the secrets of the world, and things he wanted to create.

to you, albedo was someone who became constant. not only was he polite and intelligent, albedo was nice to you; he was gentle and understanding towards you. 

it wasn’t a surprise that you fell for the genius alchemist of mondstadt.

his looks added to that factor too; silky and soft pale blonde hair and eyes that glimmered beautifully. albedo was also known to be quite a looker himself; some even placing him in the pedestal of the winery master himself.

you noticed that you fell for him when you realized you felt quite empty when he didn’t show up for three days, too into his experiments. when seeing him already brought a smile to your face, when watching him talk about the things he loved made you feel warm. when you see him take time off just to play with klee.

but of course, the genius alchemist already had someone in mind.

his student, sucrose. sucrose wasn’t that younger than the both of you, merely a year or two younger. she was painfully shy but she was kind and gentle. like albedo, her intelligence also shone brightly. she was very giving and worked hard to prove herself to her teacher.

it pained you to admit that albedo may be in love with her, only seeing you as a friend and nothing more.

“y/n.” albedo’s silky voice snapped you out of your rather depressing thoughts, causing you to look where he was. he stood a few feet away from you, sketchbook in hand alongside his pen. “albedo! good morning.” you greeted him, and you hated how you already felt happy and energized just seeing the genius alchemist.

albedo gives you a soft smile, walking towards you. “i know this is quite sudden, but i wanted to ask you for a favor.” he says, stopping in front of you. you hum, locking your hands behind your back. “depends what kind of favor it is. the last favor you made me do almost made me fall in the middle of a large hilichurl camp.” you grumbled teasingly, lips quirking. albedo chuckles sheepishly, tilting his head. “well, i would have saved you if that happened.” he suggested, making you blink in surprise. warmth flooded you, making your cheeks tint pink.

you clear your throat, smiling brightly. “well? what favor is it, then?” you ask him. he gestures you to follow him which you gladly did. “i am...not familiar with the world of romance...so i decided to ask you, my most trusted friend.” he speaks slowly, looking away from you as he takes in mondstadt scenery.

unknown to him, your heart shattered into tiny pieces.

“a-ah! what is it?” you ask him, looking down on your feet. you didn’t know why you were doing this to yourself; breaking your heart by telling albedo advice. “i have liked this person for quite some time now...and i think it is time for me to confess.” albedo answers you, looking at you in the corner of his eye.

you swallow the upcoming bile in your throat, your tummy doing flips which made you nauseous. you could practically feel and hear your heart shatter at his words, your hands turning clammy. you could feel your eyes turning misty but you push the tears back.

maybe you were too selfless, but you were a friend to albedo. he trusted you so much to come to you for this type of advice. deep down, you didn’t want to give him advice. you wanted to scream at him, tell him you love him.

but...maybe this is better.

so you force a smile, and the words tumbled out from your mouth.

“well, it depends on the person! if the person you like is quite shy and doesn’t like attention, then maybe you should confess to them when you’re alone. public proposals are a bit too much if the person is shy and quite reclusive. it’ll only pressure them, and that’s not a good thing!” you tell him, wagging your finger. “i suggest drawing them? since you’re a really good artist, then maybe making a portrait of them will touch them!” you added on, smiling.

he stops in his tracks, eyes turning to you.

“y/n...why are you crying?”

you freeze, eyes widening at his words. slowly, your fingertips touched your cheeks and true to his words, there were indeed tears streaming down from your eyes.

curse your emotional self.

waving your hands around, you let out a nervous and high pitched laugh. “it’s nothing, it’s nothing! dust probably came in my eyes hehe...” you replied to him, your smile shaky. 

albedo tilted his head, his eyes seemingly analyzing you. you were frozen when he steps near, hands coming up to touch your cheeks. “did i hurt you?” he mutters, his eyes staring into yours. “e-eh...?” you stumble, swallowing. “w-why would you hurt me? you did nothing wrong, albedo! like i said, dust probably came in my eyes...” you trail off when albedo shuts his eyes, sighing softly.

“i asked kaeya on how to confess too. he told me that i should fool around with the person i like, asking them how to confess and such, then drop my question when the moment felt right.” albedo says softly, opening his eyes.

“but i didn’t expect you to cry and think that i was referring to sucrose.”

your cheeks burned at his words and at his accusatory eyes, making you gulp. “w-well! who else could you refer to! acting grandmaster jean? if so, then maybe confessing to her under the big tree in windrise will make her think about you more! or is it lisa? you can give her a sealed scroll! oh, is it amber? then-”

“i was referring to you.”

you went still as a rock at his honest words, eyes meeting his serious ones. you open your mouth to speak, but no words escaped. you were left gaping at him, eyes wide and cheeks bright. “i do not like sucrose that way. she is my student and only that. acting grandmaster jean is only my superior and i merely respect lisa for her intelligence and prowess. amber is only someone i am curious about and that is that. i do not like any of them,” he pauses, collecting his words.

“i like you, y/n.”

your cheeks turned hotter at his words and you couldn’t form a single sentence. the corner of his lips quirked at your reaction, his eyes gentle and amused. he opens his sketchbook, stopping at a particular page.

it was a drawing of you when you and him were out on an adventure. it was a sketch of you asleep against a tree, face peaceful and relaxed. “you are the person i like. i am sorry if i hurt you because of how insensitive i came off towards your own feelings, kaeya told me that this will make you find out about how i feel towards you and...” albedo trails off when you tackled him, a bright and relieved laughter escaping your lips. his arms instinctively rose to hug you around the waist as he looks at you, eyes misty but bright and happy. your lips were pulled into a bright smile, expression soft and gentle. no matter how much he practice, he could never replicate your emotions. it was too pure and bright to even be copied and it always turned lousy, something undeserving of someone like you.

“i like you too, albedo. i really do.”

relief crossed in his face, his hands coming up to cup your face.

“i’m glad, y/n. i really am.”

[alittlesimp]

Ranpo, Gin and Akutagawa with an s/o who is very attached to them

request: Helloo can you do ranpo,gin and akutagawa with a reader who has attachment issues and they are very attched to them?? İf you do. thank you!

a/n: i have to admit, while i love writing about these three i'm not the best at them :') i tried my best but im sorry if it sucks lmaoo

warnings: none

· I see him as someone who is very hot-and-cold in relationships

· Like one minute he is the clingiest person ever and the next he will forget to reply to your texts

· Not because he’s playing a game with your feelings (he does genuinely care about you) or because he needs space (which would be perfectly valid btw), he’s just like that LMAO

· While that might be hard to deal with, he will make it up to you later

· Doesn’t mind if you’re clingy as long as you don’t get extremely upset with him

· In fact, he lowkey adores it. Apparently he’s so amazing he got you to love him this much? Truly the greatest detective and boyfriend.

· Initially he might find it challenging to empathize with your feelings when you do get upset

· He’ll say something very insensitive, but after taking some time to cool off and thinking it through he’ll realize he shouldn’t have reacted like that

· His more serious side will come out

· Will reassure you that he cares a lot about you and ask you to explain your thought process so he can understand you better

· After which he’ll pretend this whole thing never happened, though internally he’s trying to be more considerate :)

· She’s away a lot because of her job so in-person quality time is rare

· Her phone is also off or left at home (except for that fucking FLIP PHONE everyone uses) so it can be hard to reach her when she’s on the job

· That doesn’t mean she doesn’t think of you though :)

· When she’s done for the day she always makes sure to call you, no matter how tired she definitely is

· And she tries to bring back souvenirs if she has the time

· She’ll always let you know exactly when she’s away, even if she has to leave in a hurry

· She doesn’t want you to worry about her, but she does understand you

· She has a dangerous job so it’s not like your concerns are ungrounded!

· When she’s home she tries to make up for lost time (she’s missed you too)

· While she does need some her-time sometimes, she enjoys being around you and very frequently takes the initiative on planning quality time together

· Gin definitely won’t make you feel unwanted, even if she can’t be with you all the time

· Oh man. He will be so annoyed with you, especially if you feel attached to him before you’re in a relationship, when he’s still trying to figure out who you are and what he thinks of you

· Doesn’t understand why you act the way you do and will lash out. A lot.

· This guy can’t handle weakness and because of how you act towards him he probably doesn’t think very highly of you at the beginning

· Will be offended if you worry about him, assumes it’s because you think he’s incapable of doing his job correctly (but then… you give him compliments as well? It doesn’t add up in his head)

· When he sees how different you are around others, and most importantly when you show him you’re not weak, his opinion of you slowly changes

· He’ll still be annoyed but his confusion will slowly take over

· You’re clearly a capable person, so why do you act like this?

· One day he’ll very bluntly ask you why you’re so clingy and no matter how much you may try to dance around it, he will get an answer… Which’ll make his brain explode

· Akutagawa.exe has stopped

· Will have to get used to the idea of a relationship, but once you’re together he’ll slowly but surely get more affectionate (in his own way)

· Because he Understands Why now, he won’t get mad at you for being clingy or worrying about him anymore (maybe a bit annoyed sometimes, but never ready-to-kill-mad LMAO)

· He needs alone time sometimes, but he wouldn’t mind if you want to spend more quality time together than he personally needs

please comment/reblog if you enjoyed! i'd love to hear what y'all think <3

[chronic-claire-universe]

Hiii!! Congratulations for 500 followers <33 I'm so interested to join your event 😆

My MBTI type is INTJ. I'm a scorpio sun, taurus moon, and aries rising.

In my spare time i like to read books, watch movie, sing, listen to my favorite songs, and playing with my pets.

Most of my friends tell me I'm such a good listener, great advisor, and mom of the group.

And some of my negative sides are; i can be too sensitive and insensitive, depends on the situation and my moods.

fandom: haikyuu and jujutsu kaisen

you can make this sfw/nsfw. im 19.

and lastly, thank you for creating this event. i hope you have a pleasant day/night <3 (and sorry if there's any grammar mistakes, english isn't my first language).

Hey hey hey anon, Claire's finally here for you! Sorry for the long waiting but I was really busy. You spoke and here in the ice cream parlour we decided the right cone for you, hope you enjoy it!

Haikyuu: Tohru Oikawa

So here we are, why did I choose Tohru for you? Your rational and determinated mind let me think you will be perfect for him.

Tohru needs someone he can chill when finishing his training but that can also scold him when he's a brat, that's why you're perfect for him.

In your free time you enjoy drinking bubble tea in your favourite café and going shopping, actually it's Oikawa that push you to go out with him.

Overall the times where you enjoy your presences, are during home dates, takes out and snacks, anime to watch together and cuddles.

Talking about the sexy time I always thought that Oikawa can be quite needy but definitely not the horniest characther in Haikyuu. He needs to have sex with you when he's frustrated after a match or a training.

He's a switch so when your pissed off by his fangirls he knows how to please you. Oral sex for him is a must, it's rare that you go to the main course without coming with his tongue before.

"y/n-chan" "prince/princess" are the words that he whispers the most during the intercourse.

During these times he loves touching you everywhere and praise you, but attention sex with him isn't always romantic, when you annoy him being irrational he fucks the hell out of you.

Mean Oikawa implies hard thrusts, immobilization and teasing, lot of teasing. Before he lets you come it takes a lot of times, and when you explode he continue to rail until he covered you in white load.

Overall everything is balanced with him, but the reason for which he loves you, it's because you saw through his smile and you were able to soothe the pain he felt towards the obstacles he faced during years.

Jujustu Kaisen: Megumi Fushiguro

I figured that you needed someone like you because you can't always take care for others, that's why Megumi could be a perfect matchup for you!

He's a good listener so when you're having a hard time he will always be there to help you.

Despite being a good listener, Megumi struggles to open up, that's why there are times where you have to try your best and let his walls fall down and talk about his problems.

You love animals, his shikigami are often with you and you love to cuddle them! He also love your pets and when he cuddles them he shoves a rare smile 💜

You like home dates where you enjoy a movie or where you simply cuddle and read a book, Megumi loves to see you concentrated.

When both of you are in a negative moods you tends to vent everything up with longs make out session that bring you to bed.

Megumi loves to take his time with you, but when he's really frustrated something will be different.

Grunts and powerful fingering is what expect you when he's in bad mood. Even when you arrive to the main course he will be very aggressive with his movements.

Megumi has a lot of stamina and he will use it unless you ask him to stop, he has high respect for you and doesn't want to hurt you in anyway.

Your relationship resume in 3 words is: dedication, respect and deepness.

[softcallofdutyimagines]

Hey so, I see your requests are still open. I know you have a lot on your plate at the moment. So, you can totally ignore this. I have homophobic and transphobic family memebers coming over and I have to stay with them for a few weeks. Im Pan and Genderfluid and they would disown me if they ever knew. I was wonder if you could Adler and Woods having a queer S/O and supporting them? Pan and genderfluid if youd like to get specific. However, queer is totally fine too. You can also just do the whole safehouse crew if you'd like. Sorry Im writing a lot.

Damn, I'm sorry to hear that :( I know no one likes to hear this, but just try to stay calm, don't let anyone edge you into saying something that could get you in trouble. You'll get through this 💖💖 Also, just know that my inbox is always open if you need to rant or talk or anything else you may need :)

I'm sorry this is a bit late :(( but as for your request, of course I can! Never too busy for a friend 💖

Adler

He is the type to use himself as a buffer space between you and anyone he deems a threat

Anyone bothering you gets a warning death glare first

And if that doesn't work, he'll try to just get you away from the situation if he can

As much as he'd love to tear someone apart for you, he knows you'd probably rather this not become a bigger scene then it needs to be

Adler is actually quite knowledgeable about mental health, and depending on how you're feeling, especially if you're particularly distressed or anxious, he'll walk you through some breathing exercises to try and help bring you back down

If not, he's more then willing to help you co-regulate with whatever you need

Physical contact, some time to address how you're feeling and unpack it, or even just finding a quiet spot to completely allow yourself to relax and breathe

Once you're more relaxed, he'll encourage you as best he can

He's so glad that you know who you and live it proudly, even with a world so full of close minded assholes

You can take as long as you need to relax with him, and know that he'll always be there for you at times like this

Woods

All it takes is one person to say the wrong thing, or make the wrong move to set him off

Woods is a very assertive, intense type of guy, so if someone says or asks you something insensitive or even downright offensive he tends to immediately turn into your mouth piece

He usually will either turn questions back on people or just outright threaten them

"Oh yeah, well they don't have to answer your dumb ass questions dipshit!"

Unless if he knows damn well that escalation the situation to violence will only serve to make you even more distressed, he's quite likely to get a little physical with anyone who's particularly antagonistic

If he must walk away tho, it takes about every fiber of his being to do so, but for you, you bet your ass he will

Woods unfortunately isn't as well versed in anxiety aftercare as Adler, not for lack of trying mind, it's just hard to remember sometimes given that he gets so upset too

He'll most likely want to go straight in for holding you, this way he can try to communicate his protective side and attempt to make you feel safe

If you'd prefer a little breathing room tho, all you have to do is ask

In which case, he'll at least ask if there's anything he can do for you to help

Regardless of your choice, you can count on him sneaking in little kisses to your cheek and hearing him tell you how much he loves you

He's just a big puppy at the end of the day and would bend over backwards and then some to make you feel better

[samiwok]

hello! can you write a scenario or hcs for sakusa? like atsumu flirts with y/n constantly and somehow they're close so sakusa thinks y/n has feelings for atsumu y'know. so he feels kinda inferior to atsumu. but ends up fluffy with sakusa please!! i hope it makes sense hshksgsns ♡

// Why.

— Sakusa Kiyoomi x reader

5 am in the morning.

Sakusa opened his eyes to look at a grey ceiling barely lightened. The lanterns on the street were obviously still on. The night was surrounding everything. He was tired. Tired for having a bad night. No nightmares, no dreams neither. Insomnia. As far as he could remember, Sakusa never really had problems to fall asleep. Yet last night he couldn’t find it. He couldn’t find the sleep he needed to appear motivated and relaxed at his training session.

What are they going to think ? He thought of you immediately. Were you going to think he stayed awake talking to another person ? We’re you going to think he had someone in his life more important than you ? No. He didn’t want to think about it.

He jumped off his bed, walking in direction of the bathroom. Boiling water to wake him up. He rubbed his face with his both hands, forehead leaning against the wall. The water falling on his back was relaxing. Eyes closed, he opened then all of a sudden when he felt he was falling asleep again. He cut off the water, and seized a towel. A warm one to dry his tensed wet body.

“Why ?” He said to himself while staring at his tired face on the mirror. He passed his hands on his face one more time, cold water flowing from his fingers to truly wake up and prepare himself to go.

“OMI-KUN !” you screamed on the other side of the road. When he heard your soft voice screaming his nickname he pinched his lips in a discreet smile. He turned his face in your direction as you were walking toward him. When you seized his arm, he frowned.

“Ew sorry. I forgot.” You brought your hand to the back of your head, rubbing it. Your lips were forming an awkward smile saying sorry

You forgot huh ? More like you don’t care Kiyoomi thought. Not that he didn’t like your touches, he knew you were a clean person otherwise he wouldn’t allow you to get that close to him. But still.

“Omi ! Yn ! Let’s go to the gym together shall we ?” Atsumu asked; appearing from nowhere. And just like always you’re smiling. Smiling to him, touching him because he’s not like Sakusa who always asks for some distance between each other. You’re right in front of him, walking next to Atsumu and gripping to his arm. Humming some stupid tiktok song and of course Atsumu knows it and you’re singing together.

How frustrating.

Sakusa was walking behind you all this time: all he had in front of him, was the gym and a head down his view. You were smaller than him, that’s why whenever you were talking to him he had to low his head to look at you.

How cute.

Sakusa liked you. He didn’t know when it began. He didn’t know why. But he knew he did. And just like he knew that, he also knew how close you were with his teammate. How could he not notice that ? You two were spending a lot of time together. And right now you were acting like a young couple. And somehow.. it was hurting him.

“Oh already, I’ll have to leave you guys...” you whined. How childish Sakusa thought about your reaction: and while he was silently judging you, Atsumu him, didn’t miss the opportunity. By the time they passed together now; Sakusa could even guess what would be his exact words.

Babe you can still date me later if you need me that much

“Babe you can still date me later if you need me that much” the blonde said, making you blush. You hit his chest softly

Idiot

“You idiot” you said

There it goes.

It was always that way. Sakusa got used to it now. He knew the two of you very well. That’s why he wasn’t saying anything about his feelings. It’s probably better for everyone here if he was keeping it hidden from you, from Miya, even from himself.

“Kiyoomi !” You shouted louder than before. It’s been a few times since you were trying to get Sakusa’s attention but he was lost in his thoughts. He blinked and hummed, giving you all his attention. You laughed.

How beautiful.

“I was just saying to Atsumu it could be cool to eat all together right after, ill tell Ko’ and Shōyō, will you come with us ?” You asked, secretly hoping he’d agree.

“Mhh, no I think I’ll go home right after practice” he answered coldly. Atsumu wrapped his arm around his shoulders in a friendly way, showing nothing but a mocking smirk on his lips.

“You sure Omi-Omi ?” He asked, his brows raised

“I am. Get off me rat.” Sakusa stated. He detached himself from Atsumu’s embrace, and kept on walking towards the gymnasium. Leaving you and Atsumu alone together.

“What is wrong with him today ?” You asked to Atsumu, wishing for an answer. Sakusa was always the cold one. He was always the irritated one. But today he seemed to be upset for a new reason. Not knowing it was you, you got worried.

A few hours passed, Atsumu had left you to go training with the others. You were sitting in the stands. Waiting for the guys to finish and when they finally were done after 4 hours. It was finally time to eat. You ran in their direction, but mostly in Kiyoomi’s direction. You were about to say something but his hands cut you almost immediately.

“Later. I’m taking my shower now.”

Atsumu shrugged to the evident interrogation on your face.

In the shower, Sakusa was mentally scolding himself. Why was he that way ? Insensitive. Irritated and irritating n the same time. While you were just a small mountain of joy, humor and cuteness. Yeah he was soft for you. Sakusa Kiyoomi was soft. Then why Atsumu seemed better for you ? Why you seemed to feel better when in his company ?

Jealousy.

Jealousy was making Sakusa think he wasn’t the one for you. Jealousy was making him act weird when close to you. Was he..intimidated ? Him ? Sakusa Kiyoomi ? How could he even deal with this feeling ? He was usually so confident, and now he was reduced to a shy and loving mess.

WHY ?

He wanted to scream. He refused your invitation, he was letting all the occasions to Atsumu. As he was starting to tell himself not to keep going like that. He heard you.

“I know you’re in there Kiyoomi ! Listen to me you huge idiot, you’re going to come with us to eat soi you better be ready soon.”

“Yn-san ! Get out of here he’s washing you know how he is !” The soft voice of Hinata made Sakusa laugh. Yeah he was known as the terrifying member from the team.

You were... in the locker room..? How bold. He didn’t know this side of your personality. Anyways he quickly washed himself, and got out to dress. When he walked out the locker room, you were standing here. Alone, and facing him.

“What took you that long ?” You asked but he purposely ignored your question to ask another. “Where are the others ?”

“Well... they were starving and impatient so they already left. Looks like it’s going to be the two of us for today.” You laughed kinda embarrassed “also...sorry for entering the locker room while you were uhm.. taking your shower”

You couldn’t notice it because of his mask but he was smiling.

How funny.

He definitely liked you. It was hard for him to admit it to himself and it would probably take a long time before he admits it to you. But at least he now was being completely honest with himself.

“Let’s go” he stated, starting to walk away from the gym with his bag on his back.

“Omi, your hand.” He was holding your hand during the way. You knew he hates germs and contact, which is why it surprised you to the point where you thought it was an accident.

“I know.” He was smiling behind his mask, a huge smile this time. You noticed it and couldn’t help but tease him a little.

“Went to the bathroom earlier and didn’t wash my hands...” he took his hands off immediately and lost his smile almost as fast as it appeared on his face.

“You could have told me !”

How disgusting.

You let out a loud laugh. Looking at him, confused.

“Omi it was a joke I always wash my hands, why would you jump back like that” you were still laughing but he was not. Obviously; the joke wasn’t very funny to him. He slipped his hands in his pockets.

“Fine Im still not holding your hand anymore, you brat”

You whined, just like a child, and passed your both arms around his right arm, pressing you against him: you weren’t in a comfortable position, and he noticed it of course.

“Idiot.”

“Your idiot Omi”

“Yeah mine”

> general taglist ; @sepirayanii @bokukiyoom @sayakaaaaaa @yeahhemmings- @yams046 @bap-kingdom @lyzzklm @onlyshinji @jabby16 @aquariarose @mindofess @strawhatshepard @fortheloveofiwaizumi @flrtykawas @strawberriimilkshake @cactuski6 @dearest-kiyoomi @namyari @peateaa

[goldstargloww]

so im part of the mcyt community, so i thought i should probably say something

trigger and squick warnings for death (more specifically, death of a content creator), swearing, and sentences ending with periods as i know that can be uncomfy

also, warning that this might end up being a rant post

so, technoblade died,, and honestly my thoughts on this are very confusing.

before i say anything, i'm sorry if i come off as insensitive. my empathy fluctuates, and death is something i find very hard to be empathetic for. it's okay to cry. it's okay to be upset. it's okay to grieve. i want everyone to know that. /gen /srs /symp

first of all, i'm an immortal alterhuman. my perception of life is that all life is eternal - something or someone can't just be alive at one point and not alive at another. death doesn't make intuitive sense to me, and is really hard for me to comprehend and conceptualize. i also don't know the 'default' difficulty for this.

so,, when i found out techno died, all i got was a sinking feeling in my chest. and no, that wasn't grief. it was apprehension, because i knew i wouldn't like the internet talking about it. and that feels so fucking selfish hdjgs

the reason i dont want the internet talking about it is because i'm an empath. although i can't feel emotionally sad for someone dying, i'll involuntarily feel the emotions of others. and, with my coping mechanism being logic, it sends me down the path of "why am i feeling like this?" because of empathy. ..and i can't do anything about that.

it spirals into "these emotions aren't mine, i can't comprehend death, how the hell do i fix this? please take these emotions from me, they aren't mine, i can't comprehend this, what the fuck do i do?!"

and then when i calm down, i feel guilty. because i don't care about techno's death, right? no, of course i do - techno's amazing and it's sad that he's died, but,, i'm not upset, at least not emotionally, and while i logically care and am upset about it, i don't have an emotional response that's mine. the only reason i might cry over it is because i'm empathizing with others the only way i know how.

tldr?:

i guess what i'm trying to say here is that everyone experiences grief differently, and having a "welp, there he go" response like i have is perfectly valid (or,, at least i hope so hsfdjgk)

you're not a terrible person (or whatever you are) for not having an emotional response to this or any similar situation. you're also not an asshole for not being able to even understand or comprehend something, and therefore being in some sort of weird state of simultaneous acceptance and denial like i am, if that applies to you.

,,,if i could get some validation on this, or just a general validity check, i'd like to know it's not just me experiencing this because i feel guilty and selfish as hell and knowing i can't control it isn't enough ^^" /lh /nf

[marauders-venting]

Hi,, I read your posts,, and they were all sooooo amazing!! I just loved them. That's why I wanna ask if you will write prompt for me. Prompt: Remus/ Sirius first date. Both of them are nervous, and share the reason of their nervousness with lily and James. Sirius/ Remus is nervous because he is preparing for the date. While other is nervous about looks or other stuff. And then how the date goes...,, English is not my mother tongue so, pardon me if their are some errors. <3

The Last Chance

pairing: wolfstar (remus x sirius)

genre: fluff

warnings: hints at death

words: 3865

note: i wrote this with @ probably_wizardingworld_art on instagram. I wrote the part with remus and lily and she wrote sirius and james and we wrote the rest together. they came up with the title too.

a/n: hi! thank you so much that makes me so happy :D! this is my first prompt so im very excited. i actually had a lot of fun writing this so if you guys want to send me requests/prompts i'd be glad to try write some of them (you can send the request on tumblr or instagram)! anyway sorry this took me so long to get to but i hope you like the result! :)

Sirius was nervous, which didn’t happen often so they were pathetic at dealing with it. He needed to talk to James immediately or his head would probably explode or something. When he entered the common room they were lucky enough that Prongs was already there; he was talking to Lily, but that didn't matter right now. He walked up to them and slightly tapped James onto the shoulder, making him jump a little.

“Hey James, can I talk to you for a moment?” Sirius asked nervously, fidgeting around with one of their many rings.

“Of course Pads,” James said. He seemed a bit concerned because Sirius Black was rarely that unconfident, especially when there were people around. “Wanna go onto the roof for it?” Too tense to give a proper answer Sirius just nodded. James gave Lily an excusing look and the two boys went up to their dorm, climbed out of the window and onto the rooftop.

“Okay Padfoot, tell me what's bothering you,” James requested softly. Sirius took a deep breath before he managed to start talking at least two times as fast as usual.

“I know it's silly and I know I'm probably already bothering you enough with this stuff but… you know our graduation is only a week from now and everyone is asking someone out? I wanna ask Moony out but I'm hella nervous about it and I don't know what to do…”

“I can tell,” James muttered quietly. Not quietly enough though, as Sirius still punched his arm slightly and called him an “insensitive idiot”.

Picking up the original issue, Prongs said, “Pads, we both know you've been wanting to ask him out for at least a whole year now and I also know you always kept saying you would do it next time. But Sirius, just in case it's not clear to you, there isn't gonna be a next time. No next weekend at Hogsmeade, nothing; this is our graduation Sirius, it's your last chance to do it. Don't let it slip like all the others. Ask him to go to the dance with you; you would regret it if you didn’t.”

James was right of course, this was his last chance but that made it even worse to him. There wouldn't be enough time after this to fix the friendship when Remus wouldn't want to go to the dance with him.

“For two years actually. But Prongs… what do I do when he says no? What if he doesn't like me this way? Our friendship would become weird and there would barely be time to fix it. I don't wanna ruin everything y'know?” They tried to explain his fear to the other boy.

“Well, if he says no you can still act as if you wanted to go as friends, can't you?” he shrugged. “Even if I can't see why he should say no. It won’t be much of a surprise when Moony likes you the same way you like him, honestly.”

“And if he will refuse because well, we're two boys and there are a lot of people and dammit we both know he hates getting a lot of attention. Do you think people would stare at us? Not that I’d mind, of course, just thinking about Moony there.” They knew the anxious tone of their voice betrayed his words, but he wouldn't admit that.

“You wouldn’t be the only ones though. Lily told me that Marlene asked Dorcas out, so there’s no need to be worried about being THE gay couple. I don’t know why you think you’d be that interesting anyway.” James earned a stern look for this comment, but he just laughed at that, then added, “really Pads, you’re thinking too much; that’s not good for you.”

“Okay… I will do it. I can do that. Totally not scared anymore. And HOW the fuck am I gonna do this?” They hadn’t even given himself a moment to let the decision sink in and had already started panicking again. James seemed to find it hilarious though because he was laughing his head off.

“Sirius, calm down for fuck’s sake. If I managed to ask Lily out you can ask out Moony; he really isn’t that scary.”

“I never said Moony would be scary, arsehole.” He gave James a playful shove before he continued. “Besides, you definitely can't compare that! You and Lily are already dating, she would have been goin’ with you anyway. AND Moony would KILL me if I would make it a big, public thing like you did. Would definitely fit my attitude, but if I want him to say yes I’m not gonna do it like you.”

“Guess you're right about that. Maybe just ask him to talk in private then? If you won’t get it done until tomorrow, I solemnly swear I’m gonna lock you two up in our dormitory,” Prongs said, grinning mischievously.

“Bloody hell, Potter! You definitely WON’T do that, got it??” James just poked out his tongue at that.

“Don't worry about it too much mate, it's gonna be alright,” he assured him.

“Thanks for helping out Prongs,” Sirius spoke genuinely.

“Any time Padfoot.” The two lads climbed back into the dormitory. James went searching for Lily to continue their conversation. Sirius was alone in the room so he sat down on his bed and started thinking about what he wanted to say to Remus, just in case he would remember any of it when he actually had to ask him out.

---------

“So do you know who you’re going to the dance with?” Lily asked.

“No,” Remus said.

“Why not?”

“Well, it may have escaped your notice but we don’t all have boyfriends who’ve been in love with us for six and a half years,” Remus snapped.

“Geez,” Lily said. “I’m sorry I mentioned it.”

“No, I’m sorry,” Remus said. “It’s not you, I just… I’m kind of really dreading this dance.”

“What? Why?” Lily asked. “It’ll be fun.”

“No it won’t,” Remus said. “It’ll be really stupid and there will be a ton of people. I don’t know, I just don’t really want to go.”

“You’re not going?” Lily asked.

“I don’t know,” Remus said again. “Probably not.”

“What? No, Rem, come on. You have to come. it’s better than sitting in your room stressing yourself out about how you did on your N.E.W.Ts.”

“Why? It’s not like anybody will miss me. You’ll be with James. Marlene and Dorcas will be together. Peter’s probably going to ask that Hufflepuff girl to go with him and he’ll spend all night with her. And Sirius… Sirius won’t miss me. He’ll be with their date.”

“Who is Sirius going with by the way? Do you know?”

“No,” Remus said, sounding agitated again.

“Then how do you know he has a date?”

“Lils, it’s Sirius. Of course, he has a date. Literally, half the school is head over heels for them.”

“Does that half include you then?” Lily muttered under her breath.

“W–what?” Remus said.

“Nothing, nothing,” Lily sighed. “So you’re really not going?”

“I’d just be standing there alone in the corner. I’ll be even more awkward than usual.”

“You wouldn’t be alone, Remus. Do you really think we’d all ditch you just because we have dates? We’re still your friends.”

“Fair enough,” Remus said. “And thanks for the offer but as much as I would enjoy third-wheeling with you and James, it’s a hard pass.”

“Come on, Remus, there must be somebody you want to ask to the dance,” Lily insisted.

“No,” Remus muttered. “There isn’t anybody I want to go with.” But the blush on his cheeks gave him away.

“Remus, you’re a horrible liar,” Lily said. “Now spill the secret. Who do you want to ask?”

“Nobody!” Remus insisted, but his blush only deepened. “There’s no secret!”

“You know you can tell me anything, Remus. Don’t you trust me with your secret? We’ve been best friends for seven years.”

“Which is exactly why I know not to trust you with my secret,” Remus said.

“Aha! I knew there was a secret!” Lily said. “Come on, just tell me.”

“You’ll laugh at me,” Remus said. “You’ll say I’m ridiculous for suggesting it.”

“No I won’t,” Lily said. “Rem, I swear on my life, I won’t. Just tell me.”

“Fine,” Remus swallowed. “Sirius.”

“I knew it!” Lily yelled. “I fucking knew it!”

“Keep your voice down!” Remus said.

“Sorry,” she whispered. “I knew it though.”

“Great, I’m a bad liar, you proved your point,” Remus said. “Now do you see why I would be going to the dance alone?”

“No, actually, I do not,” Lily said. “You want to ask Sirius to the dance so ask him to the dance.” Remus snorted.

“Yeah, right.”

“What?”

“Lily, if I ask Sirius to the dance one of two things is going to happen. One, they’ll assume I mean as friends and I’ll look like a complete idiot. Two, they’ll turn me down and then everything will get awkward and he’ll hate me and if that happens I might just die.”

“Oh calm down, Remus,” Lily said. “You accuse Sirius of being a drama queen all the time but you’re just as bad. First of all, Sirius would never hate you—”

“You don’t know that,” Remus said.

“Yes I do,” she insisted.

“How?” he asked skeptically, crossing his arms.

“Remus, a friend who undergoes a long and complex magical transformation for the sole purpose of helping you, is not going to hate you just because you have a crush on them.” He had to admit that Lily was making a pretty good point.

“That doesn’t mean it won’t be awkward,” Remus pressed.

“You know, Remus, I actually think they might like you,” Lily said. Remus laughed but even he could hear that it sounded bitter and forced.

“Lily, please,” Remus said. “Maybe he won’t hate me but they definitely do not like me. Not the way I like him.”

“Why not?” Lily said. “I was right about you liking him, wasn’t I? So who is to say that I’m not right about them liking you?”

“Lils, have you seen Sirius? He’s way out of my league. They literally have no reason to look at me like that.”

“Remus, you do not give yourself enough credit, honestly,” Lily sighed. “So how long have you liked them?”

“Since the start of fifth year,” Remus said, not meeting her eye.

“That’s almost three years,” she said.

“It is,” Remus sighed, still not looking at her.

“Remus,” Lily started, “I really think you should talk to him.”

“Lily—”

“No, Remus, listen. Do you trust me?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Bitch,” Lily said, jabbing him in the ribs with her elbow.

“Kidding,” Remus grunted.

“So talk to him,” she insisted. Remus hesitated.

“What if he already has a date?” he asked.

“Ask them,” Lily shrugged.

“And if they do?”

“Hmm I think you know exactly what you’re going to do if Sirius already has a date and you don’t need my advice at all so I would like to propose the alternative,” Lily said. “What if he doesn’t have a date?”

“I—” Remus buried his face in his palms, “I don’t fucking know.”

“Hey,” Lily said, gently. “It’s ok. Everything will be ok, regardless of what happens, Remus. I promise.”

“I don’t want to lose him,” he said, quietly.

“You won’t,” she said. “Remus, look at me.” He did. “You won’t. You know it as well as I do. You won’t lose him, no matter what.”

“Ok,” Remus sighed. “So I guess I’m asking Sirius Black to the dance.” He felt a flutter in his stomach as he said it. He was really going to do it.

“I guess you are,” Lily said, smiling.

---------

Remus walked into the dorm and found himself alone with Sirius, who looked up as he came in.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hi.” Ask him, said a voice in his head. Lily’s voice. It was his chance; the dorm was empty, it was just the two of them. He needed to stop putting this off.

“So, um… do you have a date to the dance yet?” he asked timidly.

“Nope,” Sirius said, looking back at the floor. “Do you?”

“No,” Remus replied. “So the Sirius Black doesn’t have a date to the dance yet?” Remus added, trying to relax. Just talk, he told himself, just talk to him like you normally would.

“How’d that happen?” Sirius shrugged.

“I don’t know,” they said. “I just didn’t really fancy any of the people who asked me.”

“Is… is there someone you wanted to ask yourself?” Remus asked, heart racing in his chest. Sirius hesitated a moment before answering.

“Yes,” he said slowly.

“So why didn’t you?”

“Same reason as anybody, I suppose. I didn’t want to be turned down.”

“Pfft like anybody would turn you down,” Remus said.

“I will ask him, though.”

“When?”

“Within the next five minutes probably. What about you? Why don’t you have a date?” Well, here it goes.

“I’m hoping to,” Remus said. “Soon enough.” Maybe it was his imagination but Remus thought he saw the spark leave Sirius’ grey eyes, the smile faltering slightly on his lips.

“So who’s the lucky lad or lady who’s swept you off your feet?” Sirius asked. Suddenly some gusto of bravery possessed Remus and he took a step towards Sirius.

“Well, you know them,” he said.

“Do I, now?”

“Yep,” Remus said. “He’s in this room right now.” Sirius’ eyes darted in every direction but found Remus again when they realised that there was nobody there but the two of them.

“Wait,” Sirius said, realisation growing in his eyes. “Are—are you trying to ask me to the dance?” Remus gave a small nod.

“That,” he said, “and tell you that I… I’ve liked you for a long time now.”

“No, no, no, you can’t do that,” Sirius said. Remus ducked his head, feeling the tears filling his eyes. He knew it would end like this. It was stupid to cry when this was exactly what he had expected. But that didn’t make it hurt any less.

“Sirius, I’m so, so sorry. I never meant—”

“I was just about to ask you to the dance!” Sirius said. “You totally stole my moment!”

“I— what?” Remus said, looking up. “You… you were going to ask me to the dance?”

“Yes, I’ve been trying to all day,” Sirius said. “But I kept stalling until James told me to suck it up and just do it already.”

“Wait, I— wha— I’m so confused,” Remus said, trying to get a hold of the situation.

“You… you wanted to ask me to the dance?”

“Yes, Remus,” Sirius said, taking his hand in their own. “I wanted to tell you that I… I’ve had a crush on you since we were like fifteen and… nothing would make me happier than to go to this dance with you.”

“Really?” Remus asked.

“Yeah,” Sirius said, wiping the tears out of Remus’ eyes with his thumb. “But then you got there first.”

“Maybe next time try to be a little bit faster then,” Remus laughed.

“Fine,” Sirius said, grinning. And then before he knew it, Remus was being kissed by Sirius Black. Sirius had closed the gap between them, kissing Remus firmly on the lips. And for a moment, Remus couldn’t breathe. Because this was too good to be true. Far, far too good. Sirius wanted to go to the dance with him. And he wanted to go to the dance with Sirius. He was going to the dance with Sirius. He’s kissing Sirius right now.

---------

For the fifth and last time, Remus checked his reflection in the mirror. It hadn’t changed within the last few minutes of course, but he was nervous, really nervous.

“Calm down Remus, you look good.” It was James. He had just come out of the bathroom, finally wearing his suit too.

“Really Moony, you’re worrying too much,” Peter assured him.

All of them had decided to wear a simple, black suit but somehow they’d still managed to look completely different. Maybe it was the fact that James was wearing a normal tie, Peter was going for a bow tie and Remus himself had just left open the top two buttons of his shirt. Remus didn’t know what Sirius was going to wear, as they dressed with the girls to avoid Remus seeing him in his outfit before he was supposed to.

In less than a minute James and Remus were supposed to meet their dates in the Gryffindor common room so the three boys decided to get down there and wait for them.

As soon as they reached the common room the door of the girls’ dormitory swung open and Lily started walking down the stairs in a beautiful, emerald green, backless dress, followed by Sirius and Marlene.

Remus thought he’d faint when he saw Sirius’s outfit. He was wearing a DRESS. And they looked absolutely stunning in it. The dress was a beautiful dark blue and floor-length with a plunging V-neck and a split skirt, and he was wearing a goddamn underbust corset. It was breathtaking. He only noticed he’d been staring a bit long when Sirius was standing right in front of him, staring right back, lips slightly parted. They swallowed visibly before he said, “You look good Moony.”

His face was probably deep red, but somehow he still managed to say something.

“And you look absolutely marvellous in that dress.”

Was that possible? Sirius Black, blushing? Apparently, it was and it was cute.

They had to be at the Great Hall any minute now, so Remus took Sirius’ hand and they all started leaving the common room.

When they arrived at the Great Hall they saw that it had been entirely transformed for the event. The long house tables that were usually in the middle of the room were pushed against the walls and held a large variety of food, snacks and drinks, leaving the middle clear for students to dance. A big banner reading Class of ‘78 was strung against the back wall of the hall and there was music playing although where it was coming from remained a mystery.

Marlene and Peter spotted their dates already in the room and hurried to greet them.

“May I have this dance?” James asked Lily, kissing the back of her hand. Lily rolled her eyes but Remus noticed her blushing slightly.

“No, Potter, I came with you so that I could dance with somebody else,” she said sarcastically. “Of course you can have this dance. Come on.” And she dragged him onto the dance floor, leaving Remus and Sirius standing by the door.

“You wanna get something to drink?” Remus suggested, trying to delay the moment when he had to dance in front of everybody and make a fool of himself. Why had he come to this dance again?

“Yeah, sure,” Sirius said. They stood by the drinks table, drinking juice (yes, juice) and talking for a while but Remus saw Sirius looking wistfully at all the dancing people.

“You’re going to make me dance, aren’t you?” he said.

“Oh come on we have to dance a little,” Sirius said. “It is a dance after all.”

“But we both know that I cannot dance. Like at all.”

“Come on, babe, dance with me please,” Sirius pouted.

“Babe?” Remus said, a smirk playing on his lips.

“Um, I-I mean… uh…” Sirius stuttered, his cheeks flushed. They put their head on Remus’ shoulder, hiding his face. “Sorry.” Remus kissed the top of Sirius’ head, lingering to smell Sirius’ hair.

“Don’t be, I… I like it,” Remus said, blushing hard.

“You do?” Sirius asked.

“Yeah.”

“Ok. So will you dance with me?” Sirius asked hopefully. Remus hesitated a little before answering.

“Yeah,” he said. “I will.” And he took Sirius by the hand and pulled them into the center of the Great Hall.

Remus was right, of course. He could not dance. But he was trying. The more upbeat the songs were the more difficult but as soon as a slow song came on, Sirius wrapped him in their arms and took the lead, making it significantly easier to dance but also significantly harder to breathe.

Right now they were dancing in each other’s arms, swaying slowly to the music. Remus closed his eyes and rested his forehead against Sirius’.

“I love you, you know,” he said. “I’m in love with you.” Sirius stumbled on his feet and stopped moving.

“Really?” they asked. Remus froze, realising what he had said.

“Uh I–I mean…” Remus stuttered, “that depends, is this a good or bad reaction?”

“Good,” Sirius said, quietly. “The best.” And then he kissed Remus. There, in the middle of the great hall, in front of all their friends and all their classmates and all their teachers, Remus and Sirius stood, kissing each other like their lives depended on it, like they needed the other more than they needed oxygen. And at that moment, at that moment that Remus' lips connected with Sirius’, at that moment that Sirius slid their tongue into Remus’ mouth and pulled him closer, at that moment Remus didn’t have a care in the world. He didn’t care that people were watching, he didn’t care that he might fail his examinations, he didn’t care about the war waging outside the walls. All he cared about was Sirius and the feeling he had when they were together. As long as he had Sirius, nothing else mattered.

When they broke apart, Remus’ breaths were shallow. He held Sirius close, their foreheads pressed together, his arms around Sirius’ neck as Sirius’ hands cupped Remus’ face.

“I love you too,” Sirius whispered. He could’ve yelled it, could’ve made a scene. The whole room was watching them anyway. But this wasn’t just something for attention, Remus knew. Sirius meant it. They meant what he said. He really meant it.

“I thought you would hate me if you ever found out,” Remus said, not moving away.

“Well, then you’re an idiot,” Sirius said, “because I could never hate you. Not even if I tried.”

“Me neither,” Remus said. “I could never hate you either.” Remus knew it was true the moment he said it. But despite that, the universe decided to put him to the test. It was barely four years later when Remus was desperately trying to fall out of love with Sirius, to hate him. Because how could you love your best friend’s murderer? You shouldn’t. But apparently, he could. It took another twelve years for Remus to be able to admit that he had not hated Sirius. Not really. He thought back to the day he told Sirius that he could never hate them. He wasn’t lying that day. Remus was unsure of many things these days. Everything seemed rocky and unstable. Anything good could disappear at any moment and more often than not it did. But this he was certain of, without a shadow of a doubt: for as long he lived, he would be in love with Sirius Black. And nothing could change that.

[cold-riot]

Some gayish questions: 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, 11, 37, 39, 55, 66, 67, 70, 71, 75, 80, 95, 96, 98, 99

lmao sorry im just the kinda person who asks a lot its ok if you dont answer some

thank u for asking my love!! no question is off limits for me :)

4 - is your current hair color your natural hair color? - yes it is!! I dyed my hair for AGES but I'm finally at the "i need to wear my natural hair color before it falls out" stage 😂

5- are you more outgoing or more shy? - sometimes I feel shy but when I'm around people, my natural personality is very outgoing!

6 - are you more femme or butch? - def more femme!

7 - are you tol or smol? - oh I am very smol (5'4" hehe)

9 - weird habit? - I don't think I have any like weird habits?? but I definitely have anxiety-influenced habits like consistent foot tapping and skin-picking and shit, like to the point where other people notice 😅

11 - do you sing in the shower? - more like I put on my own fucking CONCERT in the shower omg

37 - something you fantasize about. - being in a band. that would be so fucking dope.

39 - what was the last thing that made you laugh? - I think some TikTok or IG reel

55 - did you hang out with the person you like recently? - heck yeah!! he's my bf and I live with him 😎

66 - who was your celebrity/fictional gay awakening? - oh God this is such a good question. ngl I think it was Velma in that fucking Scooby-Doo movie when she walks down the stairs in that orange leather jumpsuit like 😍 ok mommy sheeeeesh

67 - intimidating girls or kind girls? - I personally vibe most with kind girls. intimidating can sometimes be hot but usually its a turn-off for me and makes you unapproachable.

70 - are you good at flirting? - ummm to an extent HAHA I feel like I can get awkward about it sometimes, but maybe after like 3 glasses of wine I'll be feeling pretty confident 😂

71 - who was the first person you came out to? - so I haven't really fully, truly "come out" in the sense of like making a post about it and telling people and stuff like that. I think all the people in my life know because it's been casually brought up in conversation or were there to see me go through various relationships with women so like they knew. but I never actually ever "came out." some people in my life don't know, and that's fine. I think me not entirely coming out has to do with a deep-rooted scared feeling of feeling rejected or abandoned because my family is very much conservative and I know they wouldn't be cool with it, so I've just always kept it as a topic of conversation more than a sit-down let-me-get-this-off-my-chest kind of thing. family still doesn't know, but I've come to terms with the fact that it's also none of their business (especially as a 26-year-old woman)!

75 - write a short love poem to your crush/self? - omg this is hard but i love poetry writing ok lemme try

free spirit baby

i envy the carefree light in your eyes

a soul that serves for the weak, unknown

and though you lack the strength to see

i’ll burden your last breath

((i can't help but make any love poem also sound sad sorry LOL))

80 - what is your “type?” - ummm for men definitely facial hair, i def like a guy with a beard, usually heavier set. for women I usually like more femme, also heavier set. look I'm just about the BBW okay 😂

95 - do you have a favorite lesbian ship? is it canon? - I actually don't have a fave lesbian ship at all! I usually read a lot of male x male ships

96 - what is the most aggravating thing someone has said to you about your sexuality? - honestly no one has really said anything that aggravates me, but I've definitely had some people in the past make the comment that I must "get a lot of butch pussy" because I'm so femme and it just bothers me when people say that :/ just comes off as insensitive.

98 - what is love to you? - love is eternal, love is everything. love is what feels like home to you. you look at that person and you feel home.

99 - ask me anything - I wanna know your gay awakening! I LOVE hearing these stories, they always make my day haha.