#aaaaaaa 1st day of spring semester
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#aaaaaaa 1st day of spring semester#ugh translations are hard and ive been all over the place today. its really weird#and its like 7pm and i just wanna sleep. does not bode well#literally im only taking 1 real class tho and my pi is teaching it and i like the subject and my class seems fun#so why are stress levels so high?#ugh idk we had to do an intro slide for that class and it wasnt explcitly said to put pronouns in but it was done in the example#and that makes me v stressed bc im like u should put in pronouns. but like i dont wanna deal with ppl knowing but i dont wanna lie#i just wanna be an invisible she/they ya kno?#one of the other ppl is she/they and i was like !!! we were in the same stats class and i think they have a mullet lol#also my great grandma died yesterday#she was like in her 90s and senile so like it was past time for her to go#i wasnt close to her but my mum was kinda neglected growing up and spent a lot of time with her grandparents#and idk how sad she is given the dementia angle of things but i wanna be like: hey sorry for your loss#bc i dont want her to be sad but like i dont really kno how to deal with serious sad stuff. i just get really insensitive and i come off#like a monster. like she sent out funeral info and i like aggressively dont care abt her being dead but i care if my mum is sad#does that make sense? idk she txted me today abt something my advisor tweeted and i was like haha blah blah blah#and didnt say like sorry for your loss and now i feel awkward abt it#ugh i just dont want her to think i dont care abt her bc i care abt her like the most#like in kindergarten i would cry at lunch everyday bc i missed my mum. shes prob the person im most attached to#but i doubt that comes across bc im such a weird insect person#ugh humans are difficult!#also i gotta tighten the fist on a bunch of undergrads bc they arent engaging enough. so that fun. i love being in charge. it doesnt make me#want to throw myself into the sun#whatever i hope one of my friends is in my class tomorrow bc i wanna talk to her#i was not nearly productive enough today#unrelated
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