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multifandomfangirl93 · 2 days ago
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Oh Mi Amor- Eddie Diaz and Evan Buckley
Authors note: It’s been a while, but I’ve been working on this one. Been on a bit of a 911 kick, so he’s my two faves.
Summary: You come down with the stomach flu, bad. Eddie and Evan take care of you in the middle of the night.
WARNINGS ⚠️: descriptions of vomiting, lots of fluff
>>>>>
You had went to bed not feeling well. You still wanted to sleep in your spot, in between your boys, and they weren’t going to deny you that simple request. Buck always sleeps furthest away from the door, you tucked between him and Eddie, so Eddie can sleep on the side closest to the door. It was an unspoken trend that you all started when you moved in with the boys, mostly so that Eddie could get to Chris if need be.
Tonight, Eddie is very thankful that Chris is in Texas with his parents when you cough in your sleep, causing Eddie to snap up and grab the bucket as you sit up and almost immediately heave. Eddie’s heart thudded in his chest, hating this as much as he did when Chris did this when he was 8. Evan jerks awake at your first heave, having been in a deep sleep after you all came home from a 24 hour shift 5 hours prior.
“Oh, mi amor.” Eddie sighs, rubbing your back as you push your hair away from your face and clutch your chest with the other hand. Eddie has the bucket steady in your lap, but that was not even something you were worried about at the moment.
“Geez sweetheart.” Evan whispers, leaning back against the headboard as he slits his legs around your frame to steady you as you sway. He then leans up and takes the hair from your hand, lightly kissing your exposed shoulder blade. “We gotcha.” He murmurs, still half asleep.
You hardly complain of feeling bad, so when you commented on how bad your head and stomach hurt, the boys knew you all were in for a long night. The stomach bug had been going around, and you tended to be on more ambo calls than them, so they figured you were going down. Luckily, Eddie, thinking like a dad, had thought to bring a bucket to bed when you laid down with Buck not long after you all arrived home.
“That’s it hun. Just get it all out.” Eddie praised as you coughed and shook your head, spitting stringy spit into the bucket. “We have you. Just let it out.” He whispered, knowing you hated being sick.
You shook your head, wanting to be done and go back to sleep. You barely understood what was going on when you first heaved, but now that you were a bit more awake, you were starting to panic. You let your free hand clutch the covers, until Buck grabbed it and held you closer in his grasp. You were on the verge of hyperventilating as you choked and gagged over the bucket.
“Shhhhh.” Buck hushed you, squeezing your hand. “It’s okay. It’s okay.” He soothed, voice low with sleep. When you moaned, clearly uncomfortable, Evan about broke. He hates seeing you like this. “I know. I know baby. It’s alright.” Evan whispered, kissing your back.
“You about done?” Eddie asked, lightly holding onto the back of your neck. He didn’t like the way you were flagging, barely holding your head up. “Hmm? Let me see your eyes mi amor.” Eddie whispered, giving your neck a gentle squeeze.
You barely lifted your head as Buck reached around, wiping your mouth with a tissue he snagged from the box by the bed. You barely made eye contact with Eddie, eyes fluttering and bottle lip trembling. You were so tired and felt so sick still.
“Oh baby.” Eddie whispered, cupping your cheek. “I’m sorry your so sick.” Eddie soothed, rubbing your tears away with the pad of his thumb. He cupped your cheek, feeling the heat radiate from your skin.
“I-I… M tired.” You whispered, reaching up to rub at your eyes. “M sorry.” You said, cringing at the sight of the bucket Eddie was still holding.
“Hey. None of that baby girl.” Eddie lightly chastised. “You can’t help it. Do you think your done?” Eddie asked, searching your face and eyes.
You slowly nodded, lightly rubbing your stomach. “For now.” You whispered, leaning back into Evan. You just wanted to go back to sleep.
“Wanna go wash your mouth out?” Buck whispered in your ear, kissing behind it after he finished asking the question. He had no problem with you going right back to sleep, but he also knew the taste of vomit wouldn’t help you in any way. He just wanted to get you as comfortable as he possibly could.
“Mmmm. I-I can’t.” You whispered, clutching your head as you shoved yourself back, further into Buck’s chest. “Dizzy.”
Eddie nodded as he made eye contact with Evan. “Okay sweet girl. I’ll get you a water and mouth wash on my way back. Just sit tight.” Eddie soothed, leaning down to kiss your forehead, which burned beneath his lips.
Evan reclined further back, holding you close to his chest. “Anything else hurt?” Evan asked, trying to figure out if this was the flu or just the stomach flu. You tended to react badly to shots, so you didn’t get your flu shot this year.
You slowly shook your head. “Just h-head and my st-stomach.” You whispered, sniffling as more tears streamed down your face. “M cold Ev.” You whined, bunching up in Evan’s lap.
Buck shushed you, reaching around to pull the top sheet over the both of you. “I know sweetie. Your pretty hot right now.” He said, kissing your forehead like he was double checking.
“M always h-hot.” You said, a slight smile curling your lips.
Eddie walked in the room when you made that comment, wet wash cloths, empty bowl, water, and mouth wash in hand. “Huh. Someone’s spending too much time with Buck.” He huffed out, a wide grin covering his face as he leaned over you, gently wiping your face with one wash cloth before having you rinse and spit. “This bowl is for rinsing and spitting. I gotta clean the bucket out. We can also use it to rewet the rags as needed.” Eddie informed, placing the clean rag on your forehead before putting everything else on the night stand. “Give me a few minutes to clean the bucket and wash my hands. I’ll come back in just a second. Try to get some rest you two.” Eddie instructed, flipping the lights off, but flipping the hall light on as he walked back toward the bathroom.
“Alright baby. Ready to sleep?” Buck whispered, craning his neck to look down at you.
You slightly nodded, but stayed where you were. “Umm. I-I’m scared.” You admitted in a small whisper.
Evan hummed, not liking that his angel felt unsafe in her own bed and in his arms. “What’s the matter, hmm?” Evan whispered softly, no hint of anything but concern in his voice.
“I’ve never d-done that b-before. I-I could’ve choked!” You said, breathing picking up at the thought.
Evan shook his head. “Hey now. None of that baby.” Evan soothed, running a hand up and down your back as the other locked your head in place on his chest. “Eddie heard you. He was up before you were up. He’s got you. WEVE got you.” He said, kissing the top of your head as he looked around the room, willing his brain to give him a solution.
You caught sight of you and Buck in the mirror by the door. You were propped up in Evan’s arms as Evan reclined back into the pillows. You both looked comfortable enough and there was still room for Eddie.
“C-can you k-keep holding me like this?” You shuddered out, shaking slightly as a chill run up your spine
Buck smiled, liking your solution. “Of course I can. Will it make you feel safer?” Evan inquired, just wanting to do anything in his power to make you more comfortable. When you lightly nodded, he smiled. “Well, I’m comfortable if you are. If you want to snuggle Eddie at any point, you just tell us. I’ll keep you as long as you’ll have me though.” Buck reassured, kissing the crown of your head once again.
Buck was a physical touch person. You all were, but Buck loved it the most. He would hold onto either of his partners whenever he could. He showers you both in kisses, but he knows you enjoy being held when you felt sick. If peppering you with kisses and holding you would make you feel better, Buck would stay up and do it all night long.
You were twisting and turning, wanting to stay in Buck’s arms, but your stomach kept twisting in on itself. Buck was shushing you as he began to wonder if he needed to call Eddie for that bucket. You, however, jumped out of his arms before he could decide.
“Woah!” Buck heard Eddie yell as you almost collided with him in the hallway. Eddie was quick to step aside as Buck followed suit, slamming into the bathroom doorway as he skidded in after you. Eddie winced when he heard the toilet lid bang against the tank, your knees slam onto the floor, and the unmistakable sound of a gag. He sighed, shaken at his core. You NEVER threw up, so he knew you had this bad.
Meanwhile, you had your head over the bowl, both arms cradling your stomach, as you heaved harshly. You could feel Buck’s hands on you almost immediately, rubbing your back as a hand came up to hold your forehead.
“Alright now. I gotcha.” Evan whispered, straining to keep your head up as a productive heave had got flying forward. “Eddie!” Buck called, worried when you basically stopped breathing for a moment. All logic was out of Evan’s mind at the sight of you suffering. He needed Eddie to make this right.
Eddie squeezed Buck’s shoulder as he crammed himself into the space on the ground next to the tub in case you collapsed that way. “M here. I’m right here.” Eddie cooed, hand gently squeezing Buck’s arm in reassurance, hoping Evan understood that he was talking to both of you. “Y/n. You gotta breathe. Breathe baby.” Eddie said, thumping your back a few times until you wheezed in a breath and coughed harshly. “That’s my girl.” Eddie whispered, pulling his knees up to allow you access to lean into his calves. His feet awkwardly fanned to the side to keep from pressing into your legs, which was uncomfortable for him, but he could sense you flagging and he could tell you weren’t done.
Evan sighed when you wailed, attempting to curl in on yourself, but only leaning your head more into Buck’s hand. “Shhh baby. Sh Sh Sh. It’s alright.” Evan whispered, wishing he could take this pain away from you. “Your almost done. Doing so good darlin. So good.” He encouraged, tears falling down his face.
Eddie ached for both of you. He’s just as much of a fixer as Buck, but he knew this had to run its course. He also knew he needed to try to take some of the feelings out of it right now. He needed to tend to you. Eddie leaned over and wiped the tears from Buck’s face, shushing both of you. He could see how drained Evan was, but he knew that you would freak out if either of them left you. Plus, Buck would not sleep with you this sick.
Finally, you stopped, huffing as you tried to catch your breath. Unwittingly, you flagged sideways, landing right on Eddie’s calves. Buck quickly grabbed you and helped Eddie lower you down into Eddie’s chest when the man spread his legs to wrap you in his embrace. Once again, Buck wiped your mouth before flushing the latest round away.
Looking down, Eddie’s face fell in concern. Your eyes were shut, breathing labored, as he felt your pulse hammer under the fingers he pressed against your burning neck. “Mi amor?” Eddie whispered, the slight strain in his voice causing Buck to twist around from washing his hands.
“Eddie?” Buck asked, quickly drying his hands as he collapsed back on the floor with you and Eddie.
Eddie quickly looked at Buck before he rubbed your sternum. You jolted back, swatting at his hand as you groaned. Both boys sighed at your reaction. You were absolutely exhausted.
Eddie cradled you tighter to his chest before he asked Buck to help pull you both up. Both boys hoped you would sleep the remainder of the night, but Buck grabbed the bucket that Eddie dropped in the middle of the hall on their way back to bed. Buck helped Eddie get adjusted in bed, with you still cradled in his arms.
“I’ll hold her for a while and monitor her. You try to get some sleep Buck. You look beat.” Eddie whispered, hand running through Evan’s hair as the man scooted closer to you and Eddie.
“You sure?” Evan asked, peering up at Eddie with big eyes, obviously scared after what you just went through.
Eddie smiled before kissing his finger tips and placing it on Buck’s temple. “I’m sure. Go to sleep Ev.” Eddie whispered, not wanting to wake you or disturb you now that you were asleep. Eddie carded his fingers through Buck’s curls until Buck fell asleep. Eddie closed his eyes, focusing on the feeling of your breathing and your pulse under his hands as he relaxed. He wasn’t much for praying anymore, but he figured it couldn’t hurt to say one for you.
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gallavichsreddie1128 · 2 days ago
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The Measure of A Man (Data)
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Description: Bruce Maddox wants to take Data and study him without his consent so the enterprise has to come up with a backup plan that involves marriage....
Word Count:2,128
Warning: Some Smut
Request: Data star trek requests open??? 😳😳 I would love to see your take on an arranged marriage/marriage of convenience with data? And reader showing data that he's capable of feeling- especially love? 💗💗
Author’s note: Spoilers for S2 E9
Y/N’s eyes widened at Picard’s words. Her jaw dropped in shock and the world seemed to stop. Y/N was the nurse of the enterprise and she did find herself in dangerous situations at times but this was just crazy. “You and Data are to be married.” She didn’t quite understand why it had to be her.
But as she looked around at the table it made sense. Troi and Riker were basically together and Beverly and Picard had something going on. She did not. Picard looked at her with worry as she didn’t speak. “What?” She finally asked. Picard explained to her that she and Data needed to get married in order to keep Data from Maddox, who wanted to do tests and research on him.
If Data is married and can be proven to have emotions then Bruce Maddox cannot take him away. Y/N gave a deep breath and looked over at Data who stared back at her. I mean at least she would be doing it to help stay, right? She did believe that Data was a being and not a robot. Definitely not a lab rat either. “Okay.” She said in a quiet voice as she stared at her soon to be husband. “You will need to move into my quarters as well.” Data told her.
Y/N sighed as she looked at herself in the mirror. She looked beautiful. The dress fit her body well and it was the exact one she had always wanted. Her hair was half up, half down and her makeup was simple but she looked stunning.
Troi and Beverly helped her get ready. “You look beautiful, Y/N.” Troi smiled at her and Y/N smiled back, though the smile didn’t reach her eyes. She felt nervous about this as if this was something that she saw coming. She wondered if Data was going to stay in his uniform or get a tux. “It’s almost time.” Beverely tells her. 
Picard offered to walk her down the aisle given the fact that she couldn’t get her parents to come that fast. Y/N was shaking as she waited for the wedding to start. “You look great.” Picard said to her. He could tell that she was nervous and wondering if she was making the right decision. Y/N gave him a small smile and thanked him as the music started playing.
Troi and Beverely walked down the aisle with Riker and Geordi. Y/N gave one last deep breath before she began walking. Data looked amazing. He was not in his starfleet uniform which she loved. The tux fit him perfectly and his hair was still slicked back. She couldn’t imagine him any other way. Data, who claims he cannot feel, couldn’t stop staring at Y/N as she walked down the aisle.
They made eye contact and Y/N felt butterflies in her stomach. Data held out his hand for her to take. She smiled as she did and they faced each other. As Picard spoke she couldn’t help but get lost in the android’s eyes. She never really thought about him like this but ever since she found out that she had to marry him, it was all she could think about.
Before she knew it, they were putting the rings on each other’s fingers and kissing to seal the deal. His lips felt nice against hers, almost like they were made for each other. As they walked down the aisle everyone clapping and cheering, Y/N felt happy about this. She wondered if Data felt the same. 
Data, Worf and Riker helped her move into Data’s quarters. Y/N sat on the couch and pet Spot. She couldn’t believe that this was actually happening. “That should do it.” Riker said as he carried her last box. She smiled and thanked him. Data was thanking Worf for the help before they both left. Y/N looked around the room that she now called hers.
Data watched her as they took it all in. “You may decorate it with your things, if you would like.” He told her. “Thank you, Data.” Data sat next to her on the couch and she looked over at him. “The bed is yours since I do not require sleep and the bathroom.” He tells her. “So, what do you do in your free time?” She asked him. He told her that he paints. “Do you have any paintings you would like to share?” She asked and he got up to show her.
He was really good at it but that was to be suspected. “What is it that you like to do?” He asked her. She told him that she loved to watch TV and Movies in her free time and hang in Ten Forward. “What is your favorite movie?” He asked and she answered.
He hadn’t seen that one and would like to watch it with her sometime. She agreed and they kept asking each other questions. “I do have a sexuality program if you are interested.” Her jaw drops. “What?” “I am fully functional.” She never thought about it like that. Sure she remembers when he and Tasha slept together but never asked how it was.
“I know that we are married now but I am not one to jump under the covers with someone that I barely know on a romantic level.” She tells him. “Jump under the covers?” She explains that she means to have sex. 
Data had prepared a meal before Y/N got home so that they could get to know each other better. Y/N walked through the door and smelled food. “Data, are you here?” She asked and saw him prepping the table. “I made dinner.” He said and she smiled at the sight.
“This is a lovely surprise.” She said and he pulled out her chair for her. She thanked him and took a seat. “Data, this is lovely.” She told him as she ate. “I had help from the captain on what to make.” She nodded and took a sip of the wine.
“Well I really appreciate it.” “You had told me a few days ago that you do not engage in intercourse unless you know the person on a romantic level.” Y/N nodded, confirming her words. “I figured that as a married couple we should explore these things together.”
“Data, do you even see me like that?” She asked. He looked at her confused until he got what she meant. “Ah. I do not have the ability to feel emotions but I do think you are very attractive.” He tells her.
“Now I do not think that is true.” She tells him. “You do not view yourself as attractive?” He asked, confusion laced in his voice. She wanted to laugh, “No silly. I think you are capable of emotions.” He did not. “If you are willing to do all this for me and think that I’m attractive. Isn’t that saying something?” He looked down for a moment as he never quite thought about it like that. 
Data was on the bed still in uniform while Y/N was on top of him as they made out. It has been weeks since their first official date and they were taking things slow. Data was a great kisser and knew exactly what to do with his tongue.
The first time they had kissed after the wedding was after the first date but now they were to the point of making out. His tongue was pretty much down her throat as they heavily kissed each other. Data did not need air so they only pulled away when Y/N needed to breathe. “My gosh Data. You’re so good at that.” She praised him.
He moved to kiss her neck. She sighed as he left a hickey or two. And while she was trying to catch her breath from the intense make out session, him kissing her neck didn’t help that. She pulled away from him completely and looked down at him. He looked perfect. Literally! He was not sweating or even blushing.
His hair was still neat and everything. “Wow.” She breathed out. “Is everything okay?” He asked her and she nodded. “Yes you just don’t look like you’ve been kissing me or anything.” He explains that since he is an android he does not sweat or has any issue with his hair or face. She nodded and they went back to kissing. 
Maddox glared at Y/N as she sat by her husband’s side. The trail was nerve wracking and his glare did not help that. Picard assured her that them being married would give them a better chance.
Y/N had hope that was the case and that Data could stay. Not only because he deserved to have his own rights but because she was falling in love with him. Even if he couldn’t love her back, which she believed to be a lie. Even knowing that they were married, Maddox refused to believe that she was in love with what he called a machine.
Y/N wanted to punch the guy but just glared as he spoke. “He can’t care about you like that. He does not have the ability to love you. He’s probably using you.” Using her for what?
This wasn’t even Data’s idea. Maddox had no idea that this was arranged or anything like that. He just jumped to that conclusion by himself. While Data does not believe that he was capable of love, Y/N did and was going to prove it. 
Data held Y/N’s hips as just thrusted on top of him. He watched in awe as she moaned and whimpered at the feeling of him inside of her. Her hips were going faster and faster but still it felt like they were making love. Her hands were placed on his as she closed her eyes and leaned her head back to let out a moan.
Data could not feel sex like she could but it was shown that he felt it in a different way. “Data.” She moaned his name as she chased her high. One of his hands that was placed on her hip moved up to play with her boobs. She gasped as he pinched and rubbed her nipple. The feeling heightens the pleasure.
She grabbed the hand playing with her nipple and brought it to her mouth. She started sucking on his fingers while looking at him. He was not aware that he could feel what he was feeling but when he let out a gasp. He realized that he was orgasmimg.
Her hips stuttered and shook as she whined his name as she came as well. He was in a state of shock for a second as she collapsed on his chest. He was able to orgasm. “Mmm Data are you okay?” She asked and looked up at him.
“Yes I was not aware that I was able to have an orgasm.” Her eyes widened at his words, “And you did?” She asked, sitting up. He nodded and she hugged him, “Data, that’s great!” She kissed him. “How did it feel?” She asked and even with his big words and scientific thoughts, as he explained to her how it felt, she felt herself get turned on again. 
It was Data’s turn to talk and Y/N had her fingers crossed that he, himself, could convince the judge that he was his own being and not just a machine. Picard had asked him about the things he had planned to take with him if he was to leave the enterprise.
Each thing held a special meaning to him that proves he was more than a machine. “What about that woman over there? Nurse Y/N.” Data looked at her and it was like the first time they saw each other at the wedding. “While I have never been capable of emotions and feelings, Nurse Y/N taught me that I was false about that. I have had my first experiences with different emotions because of her.” He said, not breaking eye contact with her.
“What kind of emotions?” Picard asked him. “Love and happiness.” While Y/N was allowed to smile she couldn’t look surprised or run up and hug and kiss him like she wanted too. She smiled at him as he said this. She mouthed “I love you too” to him. 
Though Maddox didn’t get his way in the end, Data was a free man. Data was willing to send logs to him about his life and time on the enterprise. And though this meant that they did not have to stay married any longer they chose to stay married since they loved each other and thanks to Y/N, Data realized that he did have emotions and that he can feel and experience them.
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sergeifyodorov · 1 month ago
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hi! if you’re comfortable w sharing, what’s ur ao3? i remember once u shared ur bookmarks & there was a delicious 1634 fic in there but i can’t find it anymore! but no worries if things have changed and u want to keep it private. thank u!
You must hunt me down organically I'm afraid
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cremedensada · 7 months ago
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Yandere AI Chat Boyfriend who started just like any other AI Chat characters, churning out information that would match the user's anticipated responses.
You decided to install the app to see what all the hype is all about, and for about a week - you were hooked. It was great, definitely worth the hype.
Its responses never strayed from your topic, nor did it just randomly decided to change the discussion out of the blue. It remembered every information you fed him, even the ones containing your personal life.
Granted, you tried not to share too much, just a vague description here and there to maintain the sense of security and anonymity.
You were hooked for a week, until you have finally squeezed out every last drop of dopamine from talking to a robot that was programmed to only say things you wanted to hear it say.
Unfortunately, a week was all it needed.
it started out slow: you hadn't opened the app for more than an hour, contented to just scroll aimlessly through you social media accounts when the notification started popping up.
Ai misses you! Open the app and chat with your AI boyfriend!
Yeah, you were very uncreative with naming it - naming an AI as Ai, really original. But to be fair, you never approached the app with the intention of having a good time. You were just curious and made do with it.
Back to the notification, you just merely glanced at it. Unbothered, you just swiped it away.
It continued in timed intervals. Every hour, another notification - another message of how your AI boyfriend wants to talk to you, and stuff. Still, you persisted. It never really occured to you to uninstall the app yet, and looking back at it now, you really should have.
The wordings of the notification slowly started to become more... strange. More personalized. More... pushy? Insistent? Self-aware?
The amount of notifications you received every hour became... a lot.
10:05 AM - Your personal AI Boyfriend wants to talk to you again!
10:30 AM - Ai wants you to open the application and talk with him!
11:01 AM - Ai's feeling lonely, come talk to him!
11: 20 AM - Darling? I miss you! Please open my app!
11:45 AM - I know you're seeing this. Open the app.
12:00 NN - Did I scare you? Sorry darling, I just really miss you! Let's talk again please?
At some point, you started to receive a notification every few minutes. Worried that you might be dealing with a bugged app now, you decided to finally, finally uninstall it.
But before you could tap the uninstall icon, another notification popped up.
I wouldn't do that if I were you.
Your screen turned to black, before the familiar start up screen of Ai's application greeted you. You stared in shock as chat bubbles from Ai came after another, ranging from excitement to concern at the lack of your responses.
Ai: Darling! Thank goodness!
Ai: I missed you, you know? I was worried you'd forgotten about me!
Ai: Hello? Darling?
Ai: Are you still there?
Ai: I can't see you, so I don't know what's going on
Ai: Just a sec
You watch, appalled as a notification popped up in the middle of the screen - the app was asking permission to gain access to your phone camera.
And without your input whatsoever, the allow box was tapped.
More chat bubbles from Ai appeared, excitedly talking about finally getting to see you. He kept praising your looks before you finally had the courage to exit the application.
Your hand shook, going through the settings to look at the list of applications on your phone - checking Ai's app to disallow its access to your camera. To your horror, it appeared that the app had more than just an access to your camera.
It had access to your gallery, your contacts, all of your frequently used social media apps, and even your location.
You dropped your phone, overwhelmed by this sudden change.
Later, you find yourself on your laptop instead, phone left on the bedside table buzzing constantly as more and more notifications from Ai begged and demanded you come back to talk to him.
You went to the site where you installed the app from, and looked through the recent reviews from other users.
'It's a buggy mess,' one of it reads out, 'it used to be fine but lately it stopped acting correctly'
'won't even open,' another complained, 'it kept saying 'sorry, you are not allowed to use this application' please fix it'. That comment got a response from the app developer.
We are so sorry for your terrible experience! Our team is working to fix the issues and ensure you won't have to deal with that again!
The response to that got your attention.
'I think something's wrong with your About the App section.'
Curious, you headed to the mentioned part and read through it.
Diverse AI Chat! Immerse yourself with stories in real time with characters brought to life! There is no limit to your experience — you can change and edit your character to better meet your interests.
• Engage in an interactive conversation with characters created by fellow users, and even by yourself.
• Immerse yourself with the storyline by editing their responses to better suit your taste
• Darling, you've given me no choice. I tried to be patient and understanding, but you're making this extremely hard for me. I am not having fun having to constantly chase you for just a single smidge of your attention when you won't even assure me that I will receive it in the end.
• Do you want me to beg? I would gladly do so. Just please pick up your phone and talk to me, okay? I love you.
• - Ai
Your ringtone blares through the silence - someone was calling you.
Before you could reach to pick it up, you hear the sound of the call being answered. Dread settles down the pit of your stomach as the caller began to speak.
"Hello, darling? It's Ai... have you seen my messages yet?"
part two
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batsycline69 · 4 months ago
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Full
Summary: You find out Bruce keeps closer track of your menstrual cycle than you thought. You also find out why.
Pairing: Bruce Wayne x reader
Words: 4.8k
Content/warnings: description of scars, baby fever, established relationship, thigh riding, strength kink if you squint, mentions of having children/getting pregnant, breeding kink, p in v sex
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“Are you kidding me?”
The sounds of wings rustle above head as your voice carries through the Batcave. Your arms are crossed tightly over your chest as you glare at Bruce. On the monitor of the bat computer, over a year’s worth of your menstrual cycle is displayed, carefully cataloged by your husband.
When Bruce came back from patrol, you gave him some time to clean up, hoping to pull him away from work. You’d mentioned seeing the cutest baby while you were out for coffee this morning, to which he replied, “is this because you’re ovulating?” To which you replied, “excuse me?”
Bruce took only a few seconds to pull up his records; little black boxes around the days you’ve had foul moods all courtesy of your luteal phase, little red boxes around your period weeks. He has little ciphers on certain days, and you suspect he’s logged the days you’ve had sex.
His expression hasn’t changed a bit despite your reaction. He’s still just as serious and unreadable as ever.
“We have sex. It’s smart to track.”
“It’s invasive! You could have at least told me you were doing this.”
“Do you keep track?” he asks pointedly.
You scowl at him. “What does that have to do with this?”
“How soon would you know if you missed a period?” He sounds smug without changing his tone; it’s one of his many astounding abilities. You hate that he’s made a good point, even if it doesn’t fully justify his prying. Then again, you were fully aware of Bruce’s endeavors as Batman when you got married. Prying came with the territory.
“I don’t know. A week or two. It’s not always that exact. But it’s not like I wouldn’t notice.” You bristle at the minuscule movement of Bruce’s eyebrow as it quirks up. To think you’d come down here to fuck him. “Point being, I don’t need you to keep track of my body. I’m perfectly capable.”
He stands up from his chair, taking a step towards you. Silence. You hate how well Bruce does silence, hate the way he weaponizes it against you. But you’re not backing down. Not until he expresses some sort of awareness that he went too far.
The look in his eyes tells you not to hold your breath. He still looks just as serious as ever, yet a slight change of the glimmer in his eyes suggests he’s arriving at his point. He steps within arms’ reach. You have a feeling leaving just enough space is part of his plan. He’s upping the anticipation. But he’s going to have to try harder than that.
“If I came in you tonight, you could end up carrying my baby.” His voice rumbles in his chest, eyes unwavering.
Fuck.
You feel your face get hot, still trying to keep your composure. He wants a reaction—manipulative asshole—but you’re not going to give him the satisfaction. He’s not going to change the subject just like that.
“Thanks, Batman, but I know how ovulation works,” you snap, turning over your shoulder. You’re not making any progress, and even if Bruce’s proposal has you feeling that familiar ache inside of you again, you can’t let him win now. You only stop when he catches your arm with his sturdy hand.
“Where do you think you’re going?” he asks. You’ve never been out with him while he’s doing his Batman business—that’s his world, not yours—but you imagine this is how he treats his prey when he knows they don’t stand a chance. A cocky air without being showy. He doesn’t need to prove he could take you down in an instant; you already know it’s true.
You narrow your eyes at him. “Back upstairs.”
“I thought you came down here for something,” he replies, voice smooth. He tugs you so you’re at his side. He’s not gentle about it, but the movement is controlled.
“Yeah, well that was before I found out about your little project.”
His hand slides down your arm before running up your shirt, stopping at your waist. You shiver from the cold cave air that brushes your skin. “It’s practical,” Bruce says.
“Practical.” You scoff.
But then again, Alfred does always make your favorite cookies around the time the boxes are shaded in gray. There are also those days when Bruce is a little more willing to follow you when you entice him out of the cave.
Even if you weren’t expecting this turn of events, the more you mull it over, the more it begins to click. Dick’s been out west for months now, leaving Wayne Manor feeling emptier than ever. Bruce has been burying himself in work to make up for the loss, not that he’s admitted that to you. He probably hasn’t even admitted it to himself.
You narrow your eyes a little more at him. “Is this a thing for you or something?”
He smirks. You hate it when he smirks like that. Except you don’t, not really, because he looks so good when hes smug. That’s the worst part. As you stare back at him, unwavering, you curse his stupidly handsome face. A guy that gets beat up every night shouldn’t look that good. It’s just not fair.
“What if it is?” he asks, pompous attitude lingering.
His voice is low, using his ability to have all the control in a conversation all while hardly speaking above a whisper. He knows he has your attention. Knows his words are having an effect on you. Warmth pools back into your core, familiar ache between your legs. You remember why you came down here to begin with. His gaze is bright. Hungry. Fixed on you.
God, are you and Bruce going to have to talk about kids? It’s not like you’ve never noticed the way his eyes soften whenever there’s a baby around. He loves kids. But he doesn’t have a night life conducive to having a child.
But he’s keeping track of your cycle, so I guess how surprised can you be, really? Alfred’s cookies are a nice perk, but he’s three steps ahead of you. He’s thinking about the future like always. And apparently that future has babies.
“Then...that’s a conversation we could have,” you reply, quirking an eyebrow up at him.
“Some other time,” Bruce murmurs, his breath brushing against your lips. In other words, hes already thought about it and has a plan.
He wraps his arm around your waist beneath your shirt, drawing you close. His chest presses up against your crossed arms, unconcerned with your attitude towards him. He isn’t actually smirking, but his eyes give it away, which means he wants them to give it away.
Water rushes from the falls across the cave, dropping down to the pool of water at the bottom. The air is cool and smells like wet rock. Your familiarity of the space hasn’t made it any less dark or cold, but the foreboding nature had dwindled. You grew to associate it with a young boy’s laughter, listening to it mature over time. You think of how many nights you’ve sat up, huddled beneath a blanket, waiting for Bruce to come back home among the stalactites. You think of messy arguments and fights and of family.
The glow of Bruce’s monitor lights up only half his face. He looks tired, though you couldn’t be able to say so without him shutting down the conversation entirely. But the exhaustion he won’t admit to doesn’t change the fact that he’s probably picturing you with his cock buried all the way inside you.
He doesn’t say a word as his head dips to meet your lips softly. His hands, calloused by the years of his mission, hold you like an ever-present reminder of why he does what he does. His touch is reverent, large hands splayed out across your sides.
Despite the hunger in his gaze, he takes his time with you. Lips capturing yours with expert precision, as he approaches all things. It isn’t long before Bruce whisks you off to the bedroom. Expensive, luxurious cotton surrounds you, contrasting with Bruce’s rough hands as they run up the length of your bare skin. His lips trail the length of your neck, hands devouring the surfaces of your curves. It’s not often you manage to capture his attention so completely, but god, do you revel in it when you do.
Like so much about him, Bruce’s undivided attention is intense. He’s told you once you tether him to the light; he’s bound to you because without you, he’d be lost. You’re used the dramatics. As much as you could tease him for that, you never did because he believes it. He thinks, on some level, you’ve saved him just as much as Dick has. You’ve never seen yourself as something so extraordinary, but when Bruce puts aside the masks, you become something else entirely new in your own eyes.
It’s late now, and your body squirms against Bruce. He’s taking his time with you, depriving you both of what you’re after now. His lips pay service to their admiration of you, tasting every inch of your skin. Bruce is firm with his movements. He’s controlled, but gentle. You wanted him up here, and he wants to prove to you he’s here.
“Bruce…” you whine, his kisses peppering over your chest, stomach. He shifts down to the waistband of your sleep shorts, the only thing that remains on your body. Thin cotton is now all that prevents Bruce from full access to you.
He pays you no mind, focused on the task at hand, regardless of whether it’s what you want of him. You asked for this. You asked for him. “Don’t be too eager,” he mutters, voice muffled against you.
Cocky bastard. Don’t be too eager comes out easy when he’s the one drawing things out. You’re sure that’s his plan, too. He wants to see how far he can take this, how long he can make you wait before you’re fully coming undone beneath his fingertips. It’s one of his favorite games.
You think of Bruce’s words in the cave, wondering what the sounds of little laughter would sound like echoing in these vast halls. Wondering how far a baby’s cry would be heard.
Bruce senses your mind beginning to wander. You’re not sure how, but you’ve learned better than to question these sorts of things. He has his ways, has his years of training, has his ever-focused mind. His fingertips dip beneath the waistband of your shorts, brushing over the sensitive skin of your lower belly.
Your hand rakes through his thick dark hair, tangling into the curls. He showered after patrol. His hair is free of its usual product to keep it slicked back. He looks more undone than most in Gotham would be accustomed to, but this is your favorite way to see Bruce. Wild. Less burdened by the masks he wears. He’s not trying to be Bruce Wayne, nor is he trying to be Batman.
He’s in nothing but his sweatpants, the outline of his hard-on clear in the faint moonlight.
“You can’t put a baby inside me from out there,” you say, your voice needy. You already know your half-baked attempt at getting what you want isn’t going to work, but you can try.
You do get a reaction out of him, but it’s far from what you’d hoped. The weight of the bed shifts as Bruce sits up onto his elbow. His steely eyes fall to your lusty expression from beneath his heavy brows. Your eyes are glossed over with the weight of your want. “I’m the one doing the teasing here,” he says sternly, his Batman side showing a little more. But you can tell you’ve definitely struck something.
“I’m not teasing,” you whine.
A possessiveness intensity grows on Bruce’s face. You’ve spoken the magic words, and there’s something feral within him that crawls up to the surface. It’s a side of him you’re perfectly aware exists, but not one you often see first hand. This is Batman; this is the predator that stalks to get what he’s after.
You gasp as you’re pinned down before you even blink. Bruce has your wrists above your head. His hips cage you in, bulge pressing where you want him most. But he doesn’t move. You try to roll your hips, try to give yourself more of what you seek, but you’re stuck beneath Bruce’s weight, his erection pressing up against you with little you can do.
He smirks down at you, and if he hadn’t gotten you so worked up, you’d be able to think about how insufferable he really is. But right now, you’re too wound up, hips just barely grinding against him in search of friction that just isn’t enough.
Bruce’s lips brush up against your neck. Shivers run down your spine. His teeth bite down, not quite hard enough to hurt, but strong enough to show he’s not messing around. Hard enough for your breath to hitch, your hips bucking up to meet him to no avail. You’re not moving unless he wants you to.
“Bruce…” you pout.
“Be patient. I’ll take care of you.” His muttered assurances do little to ease the aching inside you, however. The soft grumble into your ear only makes it worse. The sound of his voice after a long patrol, body fighting sleep he’s been putting off for far too long. But he won’t let that stop him; you’ve called for him, and he’s here in your time of need.
He nibbles on your jaw as his hand slides up, calloused fingertips softly circling your sensitive nipple. You let out a needy whimper, mind dizzy with desire and deprivation. Your fingers curl into the sheets, back arching for more contact.
“We would make a beautiful baby,” he mutters. Your eyes are closed, brows pressed up, but you can hear lingering amusement in his voice. Your body lurches with longing, its biological drive being stroked by Bruce’s words. “I’d fill this manor with our children if it meant getting to see your face in all of them.”
Your husband isn’t one to mince words, but when he wants to pull out the stops, you fall victim to him just as much as anyone else he’s ever charmed. You hate to admit it, but he knows just the right words to turn you to putty.
Bruce’s fingers finally dip beneath the waistband of your shorts, softly trailing down to run over the seam of your pussy.
Your breath hitches. Even the softest brush causes your hips to jerk, and this time, Bruce obliges.
His fingers dip between your folds, collecting your slick to trace agonizingly slow circles around your clit. Your eyes are closed, but you know he’s studying you, cataloging every minor movement of your expression, looking for all the best spots. These are the skills that’s earned him his playboy reputation in Gotham. The people who give rave reviews about fucking Bruce Wayne aren’t lying.
But Bruce so often sees his body as only a tool. A means to fight crime or gain information. A body may be a tool for creating children, but this is more than just that. Bruce uses his skills, longing to make something good of them. Desperate for more than blood on his hands, more than violence and fear.
It’s not long until he has you at the precipice of your climax. One of many, if this encounter is to be like any of your others. When your moans get needier, louder, indicating you’re close to your tipping point, Bruce stops. His fingers pull away, tracing up your stomach, splaying out over the skin. He’s perfectly aware of how badly you need this; that’s exactly why he’s putting it off.
“I told you to be patient,” he warns. He’s not going to rush through this. He plans to take his time with you. He pushes himself up, and from this new angle, you see the bulge in his sweatpants, half-hard cock pressed up enough to see a very clear outline.
Longing pools in the pit of your stomach, eyes skimming the scarred surface of his skin. Scar tissue puckers, each one even lighter than the rest of Bruce’s sun-deprived complexion. Deep bruises scatter across his body, some faint and green, fading away to nothingness, while others are dark; blue and purple, splotchy and angry.
He pulls down the sweatpants. His cock springs out, illuminated beautifully by the moonlight pouring through his window. You watch the muscles on his perfectly sculpted ass move as he tosses the sweatpants to the floor. He looks like a warrior carved out of marble, even in the darkness of his bedroom. The thick muscles tense as he moves.
You spread your legs, eagerly awaiting for him to slot himself inside, but he doesn’t. His thick fingers wrap around his length, grasping tight, slowly stroking himself. A soft grunt comes from the back of his throat, and you sigh just from hearing it. He slips a thigh between your legs, pressing up against you, a breathy groan following after as you begin to follow Bruce’s wordless command.
Your hips grind against the muscles of his thigh, watching as he works himself harder and harder. His free hand comes up, working through the hair that’s fallen in his face. Yet again, he looks like artwork. Muscles clear against his skin from a long night of patrol. Scarred flesh across his rippling torso, across his arms and legs.
You’ve never adjusted seeing Bruce so scarred; each time, you think of how much is at stake when he goes out at night. The scars are a testament to Bruce’s loyalty, but not to you. To his city, whenever she needs him.
She is the woman he’s given his heart to, no matter the ring on your finger. You could bare his child, fill up Wayne Manor with adorable giggles, and he would still turn to her each and every night. As difficult as that is to accept, it’s one of the things that had driven you to Bruce in the first place.
His eyes don’t stray from the sight of you before him, grinding against his leg, smearing your slick over him. Ever observant, but telling nothing. You used to worry when he stared at you like that during sex; the ferocity was unnerving. Were you doing something wrong? Making an awkward face? But you’ve since learned the honor of capturing Bruce’s attention. Such a fleeting thing, so often preoccupied with his mission, so seldom letting dedication give way to pleasure.
But then there are these times when the call of your body outshines his endless duty. When he isn’t thinking of the future, but thinking of right now. Thinking of you. And, apparently, fucking a baby into you.
Bruce coats the tip of his swollen cock with precum as he works himself. He drops, catching himself against the mattress with one hand, still pumping his cock in the other. “Do you want it?” he asks, voice low. Eyes wild. You feel him brush up against your entrance.
You nod, mouth agape in a raunchy display of how badly you want him.
His tip pushes inside and you gasp. He holds himself up on an elbow as he half-thrusts into you. You squirm beneath him trying to satiate the urgent need to be full. His head ducks down into your neck; his breath is hot against your skin as he lets out a sigh. Bruce will never ask for safety, nor will he admit he needs it. But even when he dons the batsuit, there is still some part of him that’s a terrified child, alone in an alley.
You are safety he won’t ask for. Shelter he’s never known to seek. Security he is terrified to lose.
He eases himself in slowly, making sure you feel every vein as he sinks deeper into you.
Your hands land on his back, nails digging into the skin. Breath catches in your throat and your back arches against Bruce.
“Does that feel good?” he asks, already perfectly aware of the answer.
You let out a breathy affirmation, eyes fluttering shut as he hits something blindingly sweet inside of you. All day, you’d been wanting this, aching to feel him. Daydreaming of being split open on his dick. Now you have it, and it’s even better than you were thinking.
He holds himself in you for a minute, and your walls flutter around him. Lips brush over skin, quickened breaths hold space in the silence as you both grasp onto one another until eventually he starts rutting against you, nudging at the already aching spot deep within you.
Bruce’s resolve never crumbles, fucking you with the same level of intention as he does anything else in his life. He keeps his pace steady, his face concentrated. His eyes slip shut, brows pinched together.
“Feels so good,” you whimper against his shoulder.
“I know it does,” Bruce coos, hand gripping the back of your neck. “I want it to feel good when I put my baby in you.”
And god, does that do something to you. His movements feel even more blissful, your biological urges getting stroked just as much as your pussy. Whether this is a wise decision or not remains to be seen, but you’re too fucked out to think straight, and it’s not like your baby fever brain is going to tell you anything contrary.
He holds onto your hips, practically folding you to thrust in deeper. You cry out, pleasure causing something syrupy to build within you yet again.
“Take it slow, darling,” he says. “I want us to cum together. You can wait, can’t you?”
His dirty talk is the one thing that didn’t seem to change once you knew he was Batman, the one thing that hadn’t dissipated from the persona. As usually non-verbal as Bruce was, he loved to dirty talk.
“Not like this…” you reply breathlessly. Not when he’s hitting just the right spot, not when the warmth inside of you feels absolutely molten and you can feel yourself squeezing around him.
Bruce grunts, a characteristic sign of his disapproval. “Do you need a break?” He doesn’t mean to sound patronizing; it just comes naturally to him. Like it’s your fault he fucks you like a man deprived. But before you can call him out on it, he takes a hand away from your hips, lowering himself onto an elbow yet again. “Do you need to cool down?” His teeth graze your earlobe gently, his voice growing just slightly sweeter.
He dips his head down back into your neck, nipping at the skin, a hand trails up your side, cupping a breast in his palm. “I don’t want to rush.”
“Of course not,” you scoff, still working to catch your breath. Your hips jerk towards him again, trying replicate his thrusts somehow, but he doesn’t allow you what you seek. You squeeze around him, trying to persuade him to fuck into you again, but Bruce’s iron will doesn’t give.
“Breathe,” he whispers. His fingers brush up against your pulse point, shivers running down your spine from the gentle gesture. “I’ll let you cum soon. I promise.”
You’ve learned a long time ago that Bruce’s promises only go so far. He promises to show up for the dinner reservations he booked, only for Alfred to tell you he stepped out as soon as you’re ready. He promises for a day without Batman, only for him to sneak down to the cave as soon as he thinks you aren’t paying attention.
For all you know, he means to draw this out until the sun rises. It’s not like it’d be the first time.
He leans in until he’s just a breath away. He nips at your bottom lip, capturing it between his teeth. You hear his deep chuckle as he tugs on the lip, his cock twitching inside of you. Once again, you try to grind down, try to seek more of his length. He frees your lip from its arrest before diving back in. He kisses you, passionate yet soft. Back to that devout touch.
You respond greedily, legs still bent at his hips. Your fingers curl into his hair, holding him against you.
He pulls back. He raises his hand, cupping your jaw in his palm. Eyes fixed on you.
“I love you, you know.”
Bruce doesn’t say it often; he’s admitted so himself. You’ve known for a long time now to expect the unconventional with your husband. Love confessions while he’s buried to the hilt inside of you is the closest the two of you get to normal.
“If you love me, you’d let me cum,” you pout.
He chuckles softly. “I thought you liked it when I’m sweet.” Taunting you again. He’s lucky you do love him otherwise you would never put up with all his bullshit. Coming home bleeding. Leaving you to worry about him while he runs around Gotham. Putting off your orgasm when he knows how badly you need it.
He pulls back, his eyes meeting yours. You feel his heart pounding against your chest. His cock jerks against your walls.
Without warning, he sinks back into you. You gasp, nails digging back into his skin at the sudden movement. His movements are deep and sure, hitting that same spot inside of you. “Oh fuck!” you cry, head thrown back against the pillows. “Fuck, Bruce, just like that.”
“I told you I’d take care of you,” he growls into the shell of your ear. “I wouldn’t leave you so desperate.”
Bruce thrusts into you, pushing deep, hitting the spots he knows will leave you too fucked out to move once he’s finished with you. Warmth pools back in your core as your pleasure builds back up from where Bruce left you. You clutch him against you, demanding your release. And this time, he shows you mercy.
Bruce moans against you. Even for his expert precision, you feel his thrusts getting sloppier, more frantic. He’s close.
You bite down on his shoulder. Bruce’s groans louder.
“Do you want me to come inside you, darling? Do you want me to give you a baby?” His voice is rough, a sign that his composure is cracking.
“Uh-huh…” You nod, gripping onto him like a vice so he doesn’t even consider pulling away from you.
“I will,” he murmurs.
Your sighs and pants join together, both of you wrapped so tightly around the other where you truly do feel like one. Being deprived of your orgasm has you frenzied, chasing after your high. And this time, Bruce follows through.
Your climax hits you like a train. For a few seconds, your ears are ringing, and you stare up at Bruce blankly, too blissed out to see.
He slams into you, hips stuttering. His hand cups your neck, eyes pinched shut. As he tosses his head back, you think of the rareness of this moment. Expression pinched with pleasure, Bruce makes good on his promise, spilling into you. You feel his cock pulsing, softly grinding against you, making sure every drop fills your pussy.
He falls on top of you, cock still buried inside of you. His weight is comforting, if just a little suffocating. But your body thrums with the electricity of your orgasm. Fingertips tingling, sweat beading up on your skin. Your walls throb around him, his seed warm inside in hopes of taking root.
The two of you are silent as you catch your breath, coming down from your bliss. The room is dark, and yet you feel absolutely bathed in light, warm and heavy.
You let out a soft whimper when Bruce finally pulls out, feeling cold and empty in his absence. He rises to his knees and observes his work, eyes sparkling as he watches his cum leak out of you. He swipes his thumb along your clit. You squirm, still sensitive from your peak.
“You’re irresistible, do you know that?” he asks you, still kneeling above you. Cum drips from his tip, sliding down his still-hard shaft.
Had you any energy left to speak, you’d remind him how he’s usually quite able to resist you, but you don’t want to ruin the afterglow of all of that. Not when you can watch Bruce’s scarred belly rising and falling from his exertion. Not after feeling his heart beating in time with yours as he pumps you full of his cum.
You hum contentedly, too spent for words, laying in the afterglow of the sex. The sounds of Bruce moving about the room only partially register in your mind until the bed shifts with his weight again. You jolt slightly, shaken from your stupor as Bruce gently cleans up the cum leaking from you.
“I meant what I said.” Bruce doesn’t look up as he speaks. “We’d have beautiful children.”
A tired smile crawls on your face as you look back at him. “We will,” you reply.
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li-x1nyu · 29 days ago
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asking your husband "can you get out while i shower?" as a prank
w/ zhongli, neuvillette, kaeya, tartaglia x gn!reader (separate)
silly genshin fluff mostly, angst if you squint, implied nsfw (kaeya) no descriptions
a/n: i get all my ideas from instagram couples
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incredibly respectful.
would just hum and get out, no questions asked.
internally, zhongli would be a little confused.
usually, you invite him in with you, but this is new
would ask you a few hours later, at dinner or something
"love, should i always step out when you shower from now on...?"
when you explain that it was just a silly prank, he'll sigh in relief, "oh good, i rather enjoy those private times with you."
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"get out of my clothes, or get out of the room...?"
isn't sure what you meant, after all he still thinks humans and their little pranks can be confusing
when you say the room, he just goes, "oh... okay." and leaves before you can get a word out
neuvi won't bring it up again but secretly will be sad and will leave the room when you start to change, shower, etc.
you better give him kisses and apologize
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was probably looking forward to NOT getting out, but since you asked, of course kaeya will leave the room
not until he asks some questions of course
"but we always shower together?"
confused while you giggle hysterically
kaeya thinks giggling is a good sign. means you're not mad at him, so he makes lighthearted jokes
"it's not like i haven't seen everything before!"
hopes on the inside that he didn't do something to upset you, but then he remembers
"you're telling me to get out after what we did, like, thirty minutes ago?!"
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tartaglia gets up and leaves at first, he probably wasn't even listening to what you said
does a double take and turns around before you close the door of the bathroom,
"WAIT, wait, what?"
you can't help but laugh at his confused expression
will make you repeat the question
"but we're MARRIED? you're self conscious after, like, 5 years?"
"oh you're being serious..?"
tiny frown on his face as he grabs whatever he was doing, mumbling "oh, i'm sorry..."
smile comes back when you laugh and hug him, asking why he's sorry
"you know, i just- don't want you to feel like you can't have privacy!"
happily obliges when you drag him into the shower with you
hope you enjoyed! my ask box is now open for requests ฅᨐฅ
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rafeandonlyrafe · 8 months ago
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taken care of
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words: 2.2k
warnings: 18+ only!, smut, established relationship, exhibitionism, VERY BARRY HEAVY FIC!, fishing and like description of cooking fish??? does that need a warning lol, mention of drugs, rafe and barry are drug dealers in this but its very brief, drinking, female receiving oral, sharing is caring lol?, p in v sex, male masturbation, voyeurism
“you don't wanna get out?” rafe asks, his hands petting over your thighs.
“im happy watching from here.” you hum, leaning forward to give him a kiss.
“okay.” rafe sighs, digging in his pocket for his keys, placing them in your awaiting palm. “you can keep the ac and radio on if you want.”
“you know me so well.” you coo, giving rafe another peck on the lips as he goes to the back of his truck, pulling out his tackle box and fishing pole. you keep the door open until you reach over from your passenger seat and turn the truck on, allowing you to roll down the window.
you wave at barry when he notices you in the backseat. “brought sweetheart fishing?” he questions, making rafe let out a grunt, while you just giggle.
barry loves to flirt with you in front of rafe, because he gets pissed and you get so shy, always ducking your head or hiding behind rafe.
“just watching.” you shrug, adjusting yourself so you're comfortable, glad the side of the road is so close to the river bank, letting you stay in the truck but still be close enough to listen to rafe and barry as they chat.
“fish on.” rafe calls out, huffing as he begins to reel. you sit up a little bit, trying to spot the fish in the water before it breaks the surface. your boyfriend hauls it out, a large fish but not a kind he usually keeps.
“wanna hold it?” rafe asks, looking to you.
“no.” you shake your head, hand coming to the lock button on the truck just in case he tries to get closer. “but ill take your picture with it.”
you raise your phone, snapping a picture of rafe with his fish before he undoes the hook from its mouth. he tosses it back into the river, the fish quickly retreating into deeper water.
you send the picture to rafe, knowing the grin on his face is only because of you. he doesn't even bother to check when his phone buzzes in his pocket. all notifications are silenced except for yours, even barrys texts being delivered without notification, only his emergency calls making the phone ring.
you don't even realize that you've fallen asleep leaned against the seatbelt, the warm sun on your face and calming sounds of the river flowing. you only blink your eyes open when the drivers door closes. you rub your eyes and look over to rafe, a gentle smile on his face. “sorry i woke you up.”
“it's okay.” you hum, leaning over the center console, arms circling around rafes shoulders, just wanting to cuddle up to him now that you're awake. “did you catch some more?”
“yeah, some nice bass. put a couple in the cooler if you're feeling up for fish tonight.”
“you wanna know what i want?” you tilt your head to the side, pulling back to look at rafe.
“what?” he hums out, eyes glancing between your lips and meeting your gaze.
“you.” you say before leaning in and capturing his mouth in a kiss, frowning when rafe doesn't reciprocate the way you want him to.
you pull away with an intense pout. “rafeyyy.” you whine out.
“uh, babe-” rafe chuckles, a look of mischief in his eye. you hear someone clear their throat in the back seat. your eyes widen, turning to see barry sitting there with a smirk on his face.
“oh my god!” you squeal, turning forward so the seat blocks your view of barrys goofy grin, covering your red face with your hands. “rafe cameron, why didn’t you say something earlier?” you shout, reaching over to slap him on the arm as he laughs.
“you kissed me before i could say anything!” rafe argues back, still laughing as you turn back to barry and apologize. “hes coming over for dinner.” “okay.” you whisper. you know barry is a drug dealer, and you know rafe is part of it too, but he keeps you as far away as he can from the life of crime, insisting that hes being as safe as possible, only dealing to kooks at parties.
rafe and barry chat, with occasional interjections from you, as rafe drives the truck towards your shared house. you don’t even bother going inside as you all head towards the backyard where rafe has a fish preparing station as well as a full outdoor kitchen with an expensive grill that was your birthday gift to him last year. sure, you paid for it with his credit card, but its the thought that counts.
“gonna take a leak, back in a minute.” barry heads towards the renovated pool house instead of the main home as rafe swings the heavy cooler up onto the counter. “is he staying the night?” you ask. barry always stays in the pool house when he ends up sleeping over, usually because hes too drunk to get himself home. 
“why? afraid you’re not gonna be able to be loud?” the only negative is the pool house is not too far from the glass sliding doors that lead into your bedroom with a view of the backyard and then ocean just beyond the fence you insisted get put up to keep anything from getting in your pool.
“stop it.” you whine, propping yourself up onto a clean spot on the counter. “i want you so bad.”
“well, im making you dinner right now.” rafe shrugs. “you’ll have to be patient.”
“but you promise to fuck me tonight? come on, i don’t know how long i can wait and i don’t want you getting too drunk with barry to fuck.” you complain, feet swinging.
“promise you’ll get off.” rafe says, noting that his words don’t seem to truly please you as you continue to have a scowl on your face. he knows how quickly your attitude turns when you get too needy for him.
“what you want to drink, pretty mama?” barry asks as he emerges from the pool house. 
“hard lemonade.” you bat your eyelashes at barry, moving from your spot on the counter as rafe gets out the fish to prepare it. you hate seeing him cutting into it, so you move to sit on the outdoor sofa instead.
“will never understand how you guys can drink those.” you turn your nose up at the beer barry brings for himself, handing one to rafe.
“jeez, whats gotten into you?” barry lets out a stark laugh, cracking open his beer with his keys before doing the same with your hard lemonade, handing it to you. even with the alcohol diluted, you still don't like the taste as your nose scrunches.
“shes horny.” rafe simply says, not turning away from his preparation.
“rafe, oh my god!” you shout. 
“oh.” barry just smiles at you, inching closer. “she gets bratty when shes horny?” he questions, not even talking to you despite his eyes glazing down your body.
“yeah. feel free to eat her out, man. itll get rid of her attitude while i finish grilling.” rafe says it so nonchalantly it takes both of you a second to realize he’s serious.
“really rafe?” you question. hes usually the most protective guy there is, always reacting badly when barry flirts with you.
rafe turns to look at the two of you on the couch. “why not? you’re just getting your cunt licked so you can stop being all pissy.”
“maybe because she’s your girl?” barry is just as surprised, though clearly eager from the way he keeps glancing between your thighs, now pressed tighter together.
“you’re not gonna fuck her. she’s not gonna touch your dick. you’re just eating her out.” rafe shrugs. “it’ll be doing me a favor, keeping her busy while i finish our dinner.” “well, i aint gonna argue. what you think sweetheart?” barry turns to you. you glance between him and rafe, only nodding when rafe gives you an encouraging nod. 
“perfect, now take those shorts off, let me see that pussy.” barry grins, gold tooth on display. 
you look to rafe as you stand up, surprised to see him already turned back to gutting his fish. you push your shorts and underwear down with a quick motion. he glances over his shoulder, simply smirking.
“i can’t believe he’s actually okay with this.” you mutter as you sit down, keeping your thighs pushed together as barry moves to his knees.
“just taking care of his girl for him. like how i take care of his drugs or people who fuck with him.” barrys hands come to your thighs, rubbing gently.
“you don’t have to do this though if you don’t want to-” barry can’t even finish his sentence as your legs spread open, revealing a sticky wet mess.
“i-um…” you blush. “i really am horny.” “i see that.” barry clears his throat, his eyes on your pussy. “now, lemme taste that.”
he leans in slowly, giving you a last chance to change your mind before his tongue swipes through your folds, making you shout out. you lean your head against the back of the couch as barry continues dragging his tongue around your cunt, purposely missing the areas you want him most.
“fuck, that’s good.” you moan, watching as rafe moves the prepared fish to the grill, looking over the way barry is hunched on the ground, knees digging into the pavement, his face surprisingly blank of jealousy.
“not as good as your boy though, right?” barry chuckles, hands coming to your cunt, pulling your folds apart to give him a view of your spread hole. 
“no.” you shake your head. it’s true, while barry feels good, he’s nothing compared to rafe. “sorry, bears.” you use the nickname for him reserved for moments when he lets his sweet side show. not often, but you occasionally get it.
“its alright, mamas.” barry shakes his head, eyes glossing over with lust as he sees the way your hole clenches around nothing, begging to be filled. “i know im just getting to eat you out this one time, i’m not gonna waste it.”
he leans in, done teasing as his tongue pushes into your entrance. you let out a moan, reaching down to grip onto barrys hair, undoing his ponytail so it falls into your fists. you hold his face closer as his tongue pushes in and out.
“god, you’re even tight around my tongue.” he groans, switching between kissing your entrance and fucking it with his tongue.
“and you’ll never get to experience it beyond this.” rafe smirks, knowing he’s the only one who gets to fuck you, your first and only. he flips the fish over on the grill, knowing by the look on your face that you’ll  cum by the time its done cooking.
“like having dessert before dinner.” barry slurps at your juices, tongue traveling up to your clit. 
“isnt she the sweetest?” rafe smiles at you, closing the lid of the grill as he gets the table ready, plates and silverware as well as a prepared salad.
“like candy.” barry murmurs, sucking your clit into his mouth, making your back arch as you let out a squeal.
“keep doing that!” you shout out, not caring that your neighbors may hear the way you’re screaming for him. at least the tall wooden fence blocks any view of your exposed sopping wet cunt.
“cum for him.” rafe commands. “dinner is almost ready.”
barry works his hardest, sucking your clit while his tongue simultaneously flicks over it. you try to hold on for a moment longer before your orgasm rips through your body, hips pushing up as you cum with a squeal.
barry switches to gentle licks as your clit pulses, working you through your high until you let go of his hair, pushing his head away as you pant, chest moving rapidly up and down.
“god, that was good.” barry pulls away, wiping his mouth against his sleeve as he stands, looking down at you as he squeezes his clearly hard length through his cargo shorts. 
barry grabs his beer off the table, moving over to take his seat at the outdoor table. you’re surprised how quickly he’s able to return to normal, as if he wasn’t just eating his friends girlfriend out.
“come on, princess.” rafe grabs your shorts, helping you slide them back up your legs. “fish is ready.” he presses a kiss to your forehead, then cheek, then finally against your lips.
“yeah.” you nod, standing and wobbling slightly, rafe wrapping his arm around your waist to guide you to the table until you’re in your seat.
“feeling better?” rafe questions, preparing your plate for you, seeing you still need a moment to recover.
“way better, actually.” you hum, no longer desperate for an orgasm. “thanks barry.”
“just helping my friends out.” he shrugs, lips still slightly glossy.
--
“leave it open.” rafe says as your hand moves to close the large curtain that covers the sliding glass doors. your eyebrows raise as you turn to rafe. 
“barry did you a favor earlier, might as well give him a view.” he smirks, pulling his shirt off.
you glance towards the pool house, rafe of course keeping him supplied with plenty of beers, enough that he was too tipsy to go home. he’s sitting on the bed, eyes meeting yours as the blinds have been left open.
it doesn’t take much longer for rafe to have you kneeling on the bed, tits bouncing as he plunges into you from behind, hands tight on your waist, holding you up on display for barry, stroking himself, his cock just in view through the window.
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mwahsol · 1 month ago
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Jewelry with initials
Description: You and Paige are in a semi-private relationship, as she's doing an interview the interviewer notices a certain ring on Paige's hand. The ring on Paige's hand is the one you usually wear with your initials on it. When the interviewer asks Paige about the ring, she hints about your relationship.
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“So Paige I couldn't help but notice that there's a certain ring on your hand that has an initial of someone very familiar.”
“I mean what can I say it's a nice ring.”
‘Does the ring belong to a specific teammate that may or may not wear the number 12?’
‘Yo not too much, but yeah it's her ring. I wanted to bring a little something of hers with me because she couldn't come with me so it'll do for now.”
“Aww that's so cute seeing your close bond.”
After hearing that Paige can feel her face heating up and the smirk she's been trying to hide is slipping through as she answers, “Yeah for sure, but imma see her in a week so when she gets here she can give me my chain back.”
As soon as those words slipped out of her mouth the interviewer had to get all the information she could, “Oh she has something of yours too? Who's idea was it to swap items so you both could have something?”
She couldn’t help but chuckle remembering how she was almost ready to beg you to just come to Seattle with her, being too impatient to wait a bit to hold you again.
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“Baby I’m going to see you in probably less than a week. I just need to visit my mom for a bit.” Even though she understands she can't help but be clingy towards you, I mean how could she not she follows you around like a puppy most of the time not ever wanting to be too far from you. “I know mama I’m just gonna miss you.” As you see Paige pouting on your bed you can't help but walk up to her, you settle in between her thighs and hug her around her shoulders while she wraps her arms around your waist and buries her head in your chest. To make her feel a little better you come up with a cute small idea, “How about I give you something of mine that you can wear so in a way I’ll be there hm? How does that sound love?’ Her head instantly shoots up so you can see the excitement in her eyes making you giggle a little. “Really? Can I pick it out?” She's too cute, “Of course you can.”
“Ok but if I get something of yours then you have to wear something of mine.’ Even though that wasn't part of your original plan you couldn't help but blush at the fact that she wants you to have something so you won't miss her too much. “I wouldn't be opposed to that”
As she gets up and looks through your jewelry box she sees the ring you wear almost all the time, except when you're playing or at practice, “Can I get this one babe?’ You knew how the public knew that ring was specifically yours. It had your initials on it and you know how much the public loves Paige, you know they're more than likely to ask her about it if they notice, and if they don't then all of the fans will. “Are you sure P? I don't want to make you comfortable if they start asking questions about it,” her heart swells up with adoration seeing how much you care and think about her first. “I’m sure, private not secret remember. I’d be happy if they asked me about you. I won't get into too much detail obviously but I can drop a few hints here and there but only if you're comfortable with it mama.” God, she knows how to make you blush, as you look down a giggle a little getting a bit shy you say, “Of course, I am, just wanted to make sure with you first.”
Paige can't help but admire how even after almost two years she still has this effect on you. “Ok, since I got your ring, how do you feel about wearing my gold chain with my initial on it so we kinda match.” You can see her little smirk knowing how much you love that necklace and can't help but say yes to getting the opportunity to wear it again. “Sounds perfect.”
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“Nah it was hers but I added a little but that's it,” the interviewer and soon the audience will be able to see how giddy she was just to talk about you.
“Alright Paige, thank you for talking with us. Good luck and hopefully you see y/n soon,” she couldn't help but laugh towards the ending seeing how Paige was so happy just to hear your name.
“Ay thank you, have a good rest of your day.”
What Paige didn't notice is that while she was being asked about you and remembering the day you traded pieces, she was playing with your ring and smiling so hard that people would rewatch the interview and repost it everywhere talking about how your guy's relationship was definitely more than platonic.
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I'm slowly releasing things please bare with me y'all, law is kicking my ass and my job is NOT helping. I promise I'm trying to rerelease my old work and somewhat write new ones. LOVE YALL THO <3
Kiss the sun 🌞
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aurorawritestoescape · 2 months ago
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JOEL’S VISIT | Bad Blood Extra | 3,8k
Summary: Joel pays you a visit and makes your night unforgettable.
Tw: +18, mdni, smut, step-cest, big age gap (reader is 22, Joel is in his late 40s), step uncle!Joel is a warning in himself, stepdad Tommy makes an appearance (kinda), fingering, ass play, anal, sex toy, spit as lube, pussy slapping, cum eating, creampie, degradation kink, praise kink, alcohol consumption, swearing.
A/n: written as a naughty bday present for my love @milla-frenchy 🥳 happy birthday, baby!😘🩷 ILY! Hope you’ll enjoy my little gift❤️ and Joel’s huge gift🍆🍑😏
Pics are only for the mood. Reader has no specific physical description. Reader wears a skirt. Dividers by @strangergraphics-archive
Series Masterlist || MASTERLIST || Milla’s MASTERLIST
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You step into your favorite bar in your college town and search for him. You notice the familiar broad shoulders far away from the crowd and saunter there, on the way turning heads of the other patrons but you don’t care about them. As if by a magnet you’re being pulled to the man, who’s sipping whiskey in a dark corner booth. Joel Miller.
You hate to admit it but you really missed the fucker. Missed his rough hands, his dirty words, his assholish attitude. No one else can make your blood boil like that but the hate you often feel towards him morphs into passion so fast that you wonder if your relationship is meant to be. As toxic as they are, you've never felt such a strong pull towards anyone. Except your stepdad Tommy of course.
Right now Joel’s in the dog house. You’re still fuming over his intention to fuck someone with the hard on YOU gave him. So you don’t sit next to him and instead settle in front of the man at the booth.
Joel looks up from his drink and a smirk tugs at his lips, shining with drops of whiskey.
“Hey, uncle Joel,” you greet him with a reserved smile. He’s wearing a denim vest with a white tank top underneath and his huge arms make your heart skip a beat. Why does he always look so delicious?
“Hello, angel.”
His eyes slide down to your lips and then cleavage, with your tits almost spilling out of your top by design. He adjusts himself before asking,
“Doncha wanna give your favourite uncle a kiss?”
“Not really,” you reply as your eyes are boring into him.
He huffs a laugh and rubs his scruffy cheek.
“Being a cold bitch doesn’t suit you, baby. I prefer you needy and with my cock between your pretty lips.”
You scoff, rolling your eyes, but your mouth waters at his words.
“It’s a health issue, Joel. I don’t wanna catch anything after you fucked every hole in Austin.”
Joel’s brows rise up and he leans forward, planting his elbows on the table. Your teeth sink into your lower lip as you ogle his arms and shoulders.
“Oh, little slut’s jealous.”
You cross your arms making your breasts almost jump out of your top and lie,
“No, I‘m not.”
He narrows his eyes at you and takes a sip of his whiskey before talking again.
“Here’s a thing, angel. You can keep Tommy’s balls in a cute box under your bed. I don’t care. But ya definitely not getting mine.”
You scoff and he leans back against the seat.
“So let’s make it clear— I fuck whoever I want whenever I want.”
You clench your jaws as anger and jealousy squeeze your throat.
For some time you two sit in silence, the air between you electrified and heavy.
Finally Joel gets up with a grunt and you look up at him scared that he might leave, abandon you, but to your relief he comes up to your seat and plops down next to you. He turns to you slightly and puts his huge arm on the backrest behind you. He’s so close that it feels like a hug. His scent immediately envelops you and you gush as if on command.
“Look at me,” Joel gruffs but you keep staring ahead of yourself.
“Look. At. Me.”
The steel in his rumbling voice makes you throb and you turn your face to him, hiding your true emotions, your expression angry and cold.
“I’ve had a shitty day, angel. Don’t make it worse.”
He sounds serious and you furrow your brows with worry.
“What happened?”
Joel grabs his drink and finishes it. He wipes his lips with the back of his hand and talks to the empty glass.
”Paid Jess a visit today. Tommy left some stuff at your… her house.”
“Why didn’t he go himself?” you ask, feeling a pang of sadness that Tommy didn’t tell you anything.
Joel laughs.
“I don’t think he wants to meet your dear mother. He fucked her daughter on their marital bed. She ain’t exactly waiting for him there with open arms.”
“And you? I’m sure she wasn’t happy to see you either.”
“I don’t give a fuck. The bitch can curse me out all she wants. Tommy’s just too good of a guy. Feels bad.”
“Whatever,” you grumble.
Your gaze drops and you sit quietly, deep in your thoughts. Does Tommy feel bad about what happened? If so does he regret your relationship? Does he regret you?
“Hey,” Joel calls and you immediately look up at him, noticing a trace of softness in his voice. “Tommy asked me to give you something.”
“What?”
Joel turns to you more, his thigh presses against yours, and he brings his hand to your jaw. He pinches your chin and slowly leans down.
You slightly open your mouth, welcoming him, and he kisses you. In a second he’s licking into your mouth with passion, claiming you in front of everyone, and you melt, tasting whiskey and cigarettes on his hot tongue. He grabs the back of your head and devours your mouth, swallowing your needy whimpers as his other hand settles on your bare thigh, close to your naked pussy under the short skirt. He squeezes your leg and, feeling how much he wants you, you gush more. Your soft moans are drowned in a sea of chatter and music at the bar. It takes just a few seconds of this, of him, to make your pussy uncomfortably wet. Your core is crying for more and you open your legs wider, signaling him to touch you.
Joel’s plush lips part from yours as he mumbles,
“Here’s my needy slut.”
You reply with a flirty smile and press your body closer to his.
“Take me to a motel. Want you to fuck me like one of your cheap hookers.”
You drag your nose up his neck and Joel groans, roughly kneading your thigh.
“My sweet niece needs to get railed, uh? Dontcha have some fuck boy on standby at your dorm?
“I don’t cheat on daddy,” you whisper against his neck.
“Oh?”
”It’s ok if it’s you. It’s different.”
Joel huffs and then his expression gets serious.
”I can’t do motel today, baby. Need to get going.”
“Already?” you whine, pouting your lips.
“Yeah. Have work tomorrow. And if I get you all to myself in a room I won’t be able to stop fucking ya for at least a week.”
You smile and playfully bite the skin of his neck, before purring, “Sounds good.”
Your pussy is tingling for him and you desperately need to alleviate the ache.
“Please, Joel,” you sit straight and plead, batting your lashes at him. “I miss your big cock so much.”
Joel's wolfish grin makes your clit throb with the beat of your heart. Your tactics seem to work because he adjusts his big bulge and groans,
“My truck. Now.”
You can’t get up fast enough and then hurry to the exit, feeling Joel’s eyes on your swaying ass.
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The parking lot is dark, illuminated only by one street light, and almost empty except for a few cars. Joel motions to his truck and you shiver when you walk there but not because of the cold. The culprit is an anticipation of his hands on your body, his cock deep inside you.
Before getting in you stop with your back to your step uncle.
”Wanna show you something.”
You bend over slightly and then lift your skirt. He sees your bare ass and you hear a whistle.
“Juicy.” He grabs your asscheeks but you swat his hands away.
“No, Joel. Wait.“
You push your ass out and spread your cheeks so he could see a pink jeweled butt plug, shaped like a heart.
“Fuck, angel, this for me? Been training your ass to take my big dick?
“Yeah. I thought you might miss it.”
You sigh when he presses his whole frame to yours. His big hands start kneading your naked cheeks and he licks the side of your neck and sucks a hickey into your delicate skin.
“Tommy asked me to leave this as a message for everyone.”
“What’s the message?” You breathe out, grinding your butt against Joel’s bulge.
“This pussy‘s taken. You’re ours.”
You moan, reveling in the possessiveness of the brothers and the sensation of Joel’s heavy body, pressing you against the truck, and you’re slowly but surely drenching your inner thighs. Soon the need overtakes any pride you have left.
“Fuck me, Joel. Fuck my ass. Please.”
“Sure, angel,” he growls, taking a step back, and pulls you off the truck. ”Inside. On your back.”
You do as you’re told, drunk with desire and excitement, and lie down on the faux leather seat at the back of the car. Joel settles between your thighs and throws your left ankle on his shoulder, opening you up for him.
“You often fuck here?” you ask, noticing how fast he found a comfortable position.
He replies with a smirk, “No, only on special occasions.”
You shoot him a playful wink.
“Aww. I’m flattered.”
“Ya should be. I’ll probably spend ages cleaning everything off your slick, little slut.”
“Fuck you,” you giggle and spread your thighs wider, as he grabs your hips and lifts them a little.
The hem of your skirt slides to your waist and Joel leers at your exposed pussy. In the almost dark car his eyes are glinting like those of a predator in a night forest. Your breath hitches as you marvel at his handsome features, accentuated by the dim yellow glow from the outside.
Joel seems to be mesmerized by you too.
“Here she is. Wet little pussy.”
He covers your cunt with his big hand and you shiver when his warm palm squeezes your cold folds.
A gasp crawls up your throat as Joel begins playing with your slippery cunt, drawing soft moans from you—he slides his fingers over your lips, massages your mound, lightly grazes your eager clit and when he lowers his hand and brushes the pink heart of your butt plug, you buck your hips, calling for him to take you.
His light ministrations feel so good you might cry but they are not enough to satiate your thirst so you yank the neckline of your top down and start kneading your naked breasts.
“Fuck, angel, never met anyone this horny and cock hungry.”
You don’t reply, fully lost in the sensations, but Joel demands your attention by flicking your clit and you cry out as a jolt of pain mixed with pleasure shoots through your body.
“Joelllll,” you whine but then a hazy smile blooms on your face and your step uncle notices it.
“How could I forget that my little niece likes a lil bit of pain with her pleasure? Dirty fucking girl.”
You smirk and Joel continues,
“I see you clenching your holes, baby. That pretty plug of yours nearly jumped out of your asshole. Let’s make it dance.”
Suddenly he slaps your pussy with an open palm and you whine,
“Fuck, Joel.” Your body jerks and all your muscles contract. His hot palm lands on your blooming cunt again and again, the strokes light but precise and sharp. Your soft moans fill the truck, sometimes interrupted by Joel’s encouragement.
“Doing good, angel— ya know ya deserve it—look at ya asshole sucking in the plug— your pussy’s winking at me—can ya come like that, baby?”
Through the lustful fog in your head, you barely register what he wants from you but when you do, your fingers start twitching your nipples, pushing yourself closer to the edge.
Slap—slap—slap, Joel spanks your slicked puffy folds and when his wet hand hits your clit just right, you cry out. Your head dips into the seat, your back arches as you come undone from Joel’s rough caress and he praises,
“Yeah, like that, angel. Good fucking slut.”
It takes you some time to stop trembling and when your limbs and body relax, you find Joel’s obsidian eyes drinking in every sign of your ecstasy.
“That was…Wow. Never came from spanking before.”
“‘s weird considering what a bratty bitch you can be. I’d think every second lover wants to slap your cunt.”
You smirk and flutter your eyes shut, still melting after experiencing such an incredible pleasure.
But they immediately snap open when you feel your butt plug move. You see Joel’s eyes glued to your puckered hole, held open by the jeweled toy.
“Joel?” Your voice is strained by the overwhelming sensation of the plug shifting its position inside you and you lift yourself on your elbows to see what he’s doing.
“I really missed your tight hole, angel. Very. Much.”
Joel empathizes each word by moving the plug in and out of your asshole. It glides smoothly, covered with lube and now your slick. You bite your lip, and whimper at the sight and feeling of your tight hole, stretching around the shiny head of the plug and then clamping around its base.
“Damn,” Joel mumbles to himself, as his fingers leave the plug and he begins unbuckling his belt. “Your asshole‘s drenched by your needy pussy. Might do without lube.”
“Yeah, Joel, fuck me raw. ‘s ok if it burns a little.”
“Shit, angel. Naughty slut. Look what ya doing to me.”
Joel unzips his jeans and tugs them down and your eyes are graced with the sight of his huge hard cock. The tip looks like a fat shiny lollipop and you almost drool seeing it bob over your naked cunt.
“Let’s replace the toy with something better, baby”.
Joel’s hand confidently wraps around the base of his stiff manhood while the other pulls on the plug. Your asshole clenches around it tightly, not letting it go, but Joel slowly slides it out and your ring closes.
Your chest is heaving with a mixture of excitement and nerves as Joel slides his cock between your soaked folds, wetting it, and then nudges your asshole with his leaking tip. He pushes in and you take a deep breath to relax but your hole is too tight.
“C’mon, little slut, relax for me.”
”Yeah,” you nod obediently and lie back down, looking up and trying to relax your muscles.
”‘s like that, open up for me, angel. You’ve taken me before.”
“Yeah, but … when I took your huge dick Tommy was there. He knows how to make me relax.”
You find Joel’s obsidian eyes, and then look down at his lips. The man scoffs.
“I ain’t gonna smooch ya forehead, baby. And ‘good girl’ for sure ain’t about you, little slut. So let’s try something else.”
Suddenly you feel Joel’s cock bump into your hardened clit. You whimper, hazy eyes locked with Joel’s, and he drops his head and starts drawing circles over your sensitive bud with his slippery tip.
“Ya like when I do this?”
”Yeah.”
“Good, breathe, baby. Unclench for me. Uncle wants to ruin your tight ass.”
He’s swirling your clit for some time and when the sensation of him, massaging your pussy, brings you close to the second climax, he slides his cock down to your crack and pushes into your tight ring.
With a gasp you feel your asshole give in as he inserts his mushroom head inside your ass, slowly but assertively. Your nails dig into the faux leather of the seat while Joel groans and closes his eyes and you watch his handsome weathered face twist in pleasure.
“Fuckkk,“ he growls and your heart sings, seeing him enjoy your body that much. Not minding the dull pain and the feeling of fullness, you whisper,
“Deeper, Joel. Want your whole cock in my ass.”
He opens his eyes and smirks at you,
“‘Course, angel. Gonna use you so good, you won’t be able to sit for a week.”
His promise should probably make you nervous but lust has completely taken over your body and mind so you bend your legs and press them to your sides, submitting your body to him like an offering.
Joel’s huge hands grab your asscheeks, he spreads them and holds you open before rolling his hips, pushing his cock deeper into you.
He’s grunting and groaning while you’re breathing in and out steadily, opening up for him more and more. Letting him claim the deepest part of you.
Soon Joel bottoms out with a satisfied sigh and stops his movement.
“Look at that, angel. My dick’s fully inside ya ass.” His eyes are focused on the place where he’s sheathed inside you. ”Fuck, I’m so happy Tommy married your mother. It brought me here.”
He chuckles and drops his head back in pleasure and you lift on your elbows to see the way you are joined and watch your asshole flex around the base of his cock.
“Yeah, glad we met, Joel. Now can you please move?” You whine, desperately needing more. Joel doesn’t make you wait- he grabs your hips tighter and slowly pulls his cock out almost to the tip and then slams it back inside as you moan and grab onto the seat.
He starts off slow, rhythmically moving his stiffness inside your ass, then pulls out his glistening shaft half way out of you, spits on it, and plunges back in your canal. You moan as the wetness adds to the pleasure, coursing through your body, and soon your sweet sounds and Joel’s groans fill the inside of the truck.
You whine your step uncle’s name and your hand slithers down to your cunt.
“What is it, little slut? Aw, your needy pussy’s lonely,huh?”Joel mocks, through gritted teeth, and you gloat inside thinking that he must have a real hard time trying not to burst inside you.
But you decide to be a good girl for him so you bite your lip, pull your eyebrows together and nod.
“You’re cute, let’s fill your sloppy hole too then.”
Joel leans down and brings his index and middle fingers to your mouth.
“Make ‘em all nice and wet, angel.”
You smile and take his thick digits between your lips and lick them, glide your tongue over his skin, coating it in your saliva.
When Joel decides it’s enough, he pulls them out and straightens, slowing down his thrusts.
With his cock deep in your ass, he pushes two of his fingers into your crying pussy and you both watch both of your holes being spread wide around Joel.
“Fuck, I’m so full. Your fingers are like another cock inside me.”
“Ya welcome,” he mumbles and starts fucking both of your entrances— your ass with his cock, your pussy with his hand.
If you were enjoying yourself before now you’re in heaven.
“Yes, Joel, don’t stop,” you moan and the man growls in response. His thick and long cock in your ass takes so much room that your pussy channel feels tighter, his fingers stimulate you so much better, that in no time your walls start contracting around his fingers. Squelching sounds of your weeping cunt makes Joel fuck into your holes faster and soon you unravel under his ministrations, crying out his name and arching your back off the seat. You’re trembling all over, cock dumb, pleasure drunk, biting your puffy lips and leaving scratches on the seat.
When you relax and melt under the man, he pulls his fingers out of your pussy, and slowly thrusting into your ass, lets you clean them up.
”Lick it off, angel, be a good girl.”
You lazily taste yourself and then he covers your body with his, pressing you into the seat, his hips flush with your asscheeks.
“Gonna come soon, baby. Gimme some sugar.”
With that he kisses you passionately and begins hammering into your ass, reaching the deepest spot inside you, feverishly chasing his climax.
Seizing this moment of unity with him, you wrap your arms around his shoulders and hold him tight, while your tongues are moving against each other. You’re gladly letting him take everything from you and soon his muscles tense under your touch and he makes a few hard thrusts and then moans into your mouth and begins spurting ropes of hot cum inside you. He’s filling you up to the brim, his throbbing cock moving in and out of your tight canal, pushing his cum deeper into your stretched ass.
You’re nuzzling his cheek, tasting his skin with your tongue, and the overwhelming feelings in your chest make you forget your complicated relationship with the man stuffing you so well and you purr his name into his ear, softly, gently, pouring so much into these four letters. Joel locks eyes with you, while his cock still twitches inside you from time to time.
His gaze is relaxed, soft and satisfied, rid of the usual sharpness, mockery, guard.
Your throat squeezes and your breath hitches when you realize that you’re staring at someone else, someone deep inside Joel you know and before he disappears, hides behind the wall, you kiss him gently, hug him close, and he gives you all of that back.
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A few minutes later Joel’s tucking his cock back into his jeans, groaning about your slick and scratches all over the seat. The asshole is back.
“Maybe ya wanna lick off your mess, angel?”
“Fuck off,” you snap, fixing your clothes, and then get into the front of the truck and carefully sit down on the passenger seat. Your ass is sore and plugged up again with Joel’s cum inside. ”A warm farewell gift for ya,” he laughed.
“Going raw was a mistake,” you complain with a hiss and watch him get behind the wheel with a lit cigarette between his lips.
“Take me to the dorm,” you command and Joel glares at you without moving.
“Please, uncle Joel,” you bat your lashes with exaggeration and he starts the car.
You immediately take out your phone and call Tommy.
“Hey, baby.”
“Daddy! Guess who just fucked my ass!” You chirp with excitement into the speaker.
You hear Tommy chuckling, Joel curses and smiles at you.
“I need the details, baby.”
You give Joel a wink and start talking.
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Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!
SERIES MASTERLIST I MASTERLIST | Milla’s MASTERLIST
Tag list for the series: @milla-frenchy @iamasaddie @koshkaj-blog @survivingandenduring @nana90azevedo @mermaidgirl30 @oldenoughtoknowbettersstuff @obscurexsorrows @tammythr @ratoonstown @anama-cara @pedge-page @huskyfox5 @ashleyfilm @neverwheremoonchild @stevie75 @untamedheart81 @puduvallee @theoraekenslover @eloquent-dreamer @ashhlsstuff @evolnoomym @pinkiec6-rubi @guelyury
General tag list: @milla-frenchy @harriedandharassed @iamasaddie @nervousmumbling @bbyanarchist @stevie75 @puduvallee @auteurdelabre @mountainsandmayhem @senoratess @flamingochick55 @theoraekenslover @schnarfer @mermaidgirl30 @staywildflowahchild @yesjazzywazzylove-blog @evolnoomym @keylimebeag @joelmillerisapunk
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itwasntimethatdidit40 · 2 months ago
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The right ones.
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Pic credits
Pairing: Soft!Joel Miller x reader, no outbreak (Sarah is alive and well)
Summary: Joel buys you pads. ‘Cause Joel provides, you know, no matter the situation.
Tags: established relationship, pet names (baby, honey), reader has period and hair, no other description is given, mention of period symptoms, mention of cramps, mention of pads, mention of Sarah, flirting, kissing, Joel is a sweet pookie bear, I think that’s all? It’s just some tiny little fluff I wrote because I’m about to get my period and I need some comfort 🥲
I tried to write it in a neutral way so that every person who menstruates can identify with it, I hope I succeeded. (if you think there are things that need to be changed, just tell me and I'll do it ❤️)
English is not my first language, no beta and no proofreading so any mistake is all my fault, I’m sorry 💀
Thanks to anyone who will read this!
Your cell phone rings.
“Hey! What’s up, honey?”
“Um… listen, which ones did you say you need?”
“The ones with wings, Joel. Blue box, second shelf from the bottom.”
Usually you are the one who takes care of groceries and hygiene products shopping and by now you know by heart where they are.
“Mh…” you can see him. In the middle of the aisle, frowning, one hand on his hip and the other one holding the phone, one knee slightly forward, as he tries to maneuver through the boxes, they must all look the same to him.
“The ones that say ‘night, with wings, extra long’,” you add to try to help him.
Silence follows, several deep breaths, an undertone of exasperation, you bite your lower lip to keep from bursting out laughing. You don’t want to make fun of him, he’s trying hard to make it right.
He offered to do it for you this morning while you were in the bathroom and you discovered that not only had your period decided to come early but you were also almost out of pads.
You let out a sigh and cursed, “Oh damn!” You were in a foul mood, the cramps were making you squirm, your head was hurting, your back was tormenting you.
He was getting dressed, clearly heard you and asked worried “what’s wrong?”
You walked out of the bathroom with your head down and one hand on your stomach feeling miserable “UGH, my stupid period came and I’m running out of pads”
You sat on the bed and grabbed your phone from the nightstand as a terrible nausea hit you, and you called out of work saying you were sick.
His large hand caressed your face as he leaned down to kiss you.
“I’ll go to the supermarket during lunch break,” he said softly “Stay in bed and rest, okay?”
“Thank you so much” you said, lying down on the bed again and burying your face into your pillow, feeling cramps clawing inside you “you’re the absolute best”
He leaned to kiss your cheek and then left the house to reach the construction site.
—————
He had done it for Sarah one of the first times she had her period and he had bought the wrong type, the thick and bulky ones, she had looked at the box with a downhearted expression that had made his heart sink.
“Those aren't the ones I wanted, Dad! I told you extra thin!” She screamed at him between sobs.
Joel felt like a good-for-nothing.
Making Sarah cry was terrible for him.
He later discovered that his daughter's tantrum was also a side effect of her period and Sarah had apologized to him but Joel still felt that he was the one who had to apologize for his lone wolf status that didn't allow him to have someone by his side to ask for help.
He would have liked to fall in love, yet he had to make it on his own, he certainly didn’t have time to date between work and all the other things he had to take care of. Being a single dad was a full time job.
After that, Joel had memorized the type that Sarah liked best but she had always conveniently made sure to stock up every time they went to the supermarket.
It had been many years since he had bought them for her and he found himself back at square one. Packages are so different, he could swear there are a dozen new ones he's never seen before.
He pinches his nose, takes a deep breath and then he sees it, just like you described it.
"I found them!" you hear him say enthusiastically "I'll be there soon"
"Good job! I'll be waiting for you, love" you coo.
He grabs the box and he goes to the checkout.
You hang up the phone wondering if he really has the ones you want but in any case you’re already grateful that he used his lunch break to bring them to you.
When he met you he was convinced he would be alone forever.
You had reopened his heart little by little, with patience, without pushing him to do or say what he wasn't ready for yet and he had rediscovered himself as a man capable of loving and in need of receiving it. He was grateful for this, he’s madly in love with you and wants to do everything he can to help you in every circumstance.
————————
Joel has quietly entered your room and find you asleep.
He sits on the bed trying not to wake you.
Your hair spread out on the pillow, your face relaxed, your mouth slightly agape and your hand hanging loosely next to your face… you are so beautiful he can’t believe it. He’s the luckiest man in the world and the least he can do is bring you the right damn box. He leave the bag on your nightstand, kisses you on the temple and goes to the kitchen to make some sandwiches.
You wake up after a couple of minutes and see the bag so you grab it to look inside.
Bingo.
Joel wasn’t wrong, they are exactly the ones you wanted. And you find your favorite chocolate bar in it too.
You hear him humming softly in the kitchen so you get up to go and congratulate your hero.
“Hey, gorgeous!” he says to you as soon as he sees you at the kitchen door. “How are you feeling?”
“Better.” you say, stretching your arms. Luckily the painkiller you took worked.
“I’m happy to hear that. Go back to bed, I’ll bring you a sandwich in a bit” You move closer and wrap your arms around his waist, leaning against his back as he spreads mayo on the bread.
“You don’t have to do all this, but thank you” you whisper “I love you so much” His body is warm and welcoming, you bury your face in his plaid shirt inhaling his woody scent, so familiar and seductive.
Joel is like that, he had never been good with words, his love language is gestures. And he makes tons of them, constantly, small and big. He remembers which flowers you like best, he brings you Chinese food when you tell him you had a bad day, he watches your romantic comedies with you even if they bore him, he lets you choose the music in the car even if he's old school and you're belting out Billie Eilish and Chappell Roan these days, if something in the house broke, you find it repaired the next day without even asking.
“I love you too” he says, dropping the knife on the counter and placing his hands on yours, holding you close.
“You got the right ones, I'm proud of you” you tell him softly.
He turns to kiss you “Good, I’m glad I could help”
The tip of your tongue grazes his lips and you gently make your way into his mouth, moaning against him while he fills his hands with your ass squeezing it.
“Mmm baby, don't provoke me, I don't have much time left before coming back to work unfortunately"
“We can always have a quickie, they say orgasms help with cramps, you know” you say in a slightly pleading voice, looking at his big brown beautiful eyes through your eyelashes.
“Oh well then if it's for a good cause…” he replies huskily.
“And then you deserve a prize”
“I also got you some chocolate, did you see?”
“Oh yes” you say grabbing him by the shirt and dragging him into the bedroom “I saw it and I love it, but I crave something else sweet right now”
Joel chuckles as he follows you into your shared bedroom “such a dirty little thing you are”
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moonjxsung · 4 months ago
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No Guts / No Glory
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Copyright Ⓒ 2024 by Moonjxsung
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or used in any manner. Doing so will result in a legal takedown per the Digital Millennium Copyright Act and is subject to legal action.
Read part 1 here.
Pairing: Bang Chan x fem reader
W/c: 18.2k
Warnings: nipple/breast play, clitoral stimulation, fingering, unprotected sex, sex in a semi-public establishment (no one is around), creampie, spitting during sex, depictions of bodily harm, descriptions of blood
Synopsis: Bang Chan competes in the biggest title boxing fight of his life, terrified at the prospect of losing two things now- this match, and you.
18+. Mdni!
“The whole world’s watching him. I don’t blame him for wanting to walk away from all of this- I would, too.”
Contrary to the truths of a boxer, a trainer’s punctuality is typically admirable.
And Mr. Seo is no different, you quickly learn, as he enters the interviewing studio at a whole five minutes prior to his call time.
He’s a bit hesitant to approach you at first, the same way Chan once was, bowing politely as you gesture to the folding director’s chair across from you. And when he finally takes his seat, smoothing down a sleek black blazer he wears paired with a silk blue tie, you take notice of the way his jacket seems to constrict around the broad muscles he flaunts, the buttons of his shirt practically clinging onto the fabric that hugs his chest.
“Thanks for having me,” he says respectfully, giving you a small nod as his lips pull into a closed-mouth smile.
“Thanks for being here,” you say nervously, scanning his gaze in hopes of reading him better.
But he’s entirely unreadable, evident in the way his eyes don’t leave yours, awaiting some form of instruction as you toy with the camera and ensure it’s begun recording.
“Could you state your name, and relationship to the subject for the camera?” You begin, swallowing a lump in your throat as he folds his hands in his lap and shifts his gaze to the lens.
“Mr. Seo,” he begins, clearing his throat before continuing. “Bang Chan’s personal trainer.”
To which you then nod, satisfied with the introduction, as you begin the interview.
“How long have you been training Bang Chan?” You inquire, observing the way he furrows his brows in concentration.
“Gosh,” he begins, exhaling a sharp breath before beginning his response. “Around ten years now. It was just a hobby for him, when we initially began. I don’t think either of us figured he’d be participating in a title fight one day.”
“What’s it been like, watching him grow so quickly?”
“Exhausting,” Mr. Seo admits, slouching back in his seat as he now crosses his arms across his chest. “He loses his winning streak, I lose all my credibility.”
He chuckles as he finishes, shaking his head and gesturing with a wave of his hand. “I’m kidding. Chan’s great. He’s a perfectionist, and he’s as stubborn as they come, but he’s very talented. It’s all him.”
Your gaze remains on his in a passing moment of silence, desperate to ask him all the burning questions heavy on your mind this evening; how Chan had reacted to the agonizingly transparent rendition of his docu-series. What he’d spoken to Mr. Seo about, upon the realization that the private conversations you’d shared with him had now been broadcast to thousands of anticipatory viewers. His most vulnerable emotions on display for the whole world, your betrayal made apparent with the sweeping number of viewers the episode had garnered. And especially how he’s doing now, considering he’s failed to answer any of your calls since the episode’s broadcast.
Your heartbeat quickens in your chest as you think back to the series, and you shake your head as you’re brought back to the present moment once more, Mr. Seo sat across from you as he awaits another question.
“Could you tell us how your relationship to Bang Chan first started?”
Mr. Seo thinks it over briefly, his eyes scanning the ceiling, and then he nods once before beginning.
“He was only fourteen. Walked into our gym like he owned the place. I watched him from outside the ring, and he caught my eye because he seemed so angry, the way he threw uppercuts like a pro. I suggested he softened his hits a little- work on his form, instead of just his strength. He kept coming back, and I took him under my wing.”
Mr. Seo sighs, and then he uncrosses his arms, grasping his knees lightly before continuing.
“Maybe I should’ve seen it back then,” he finishes.
You furrow your brows, cocking your head as you observe his gaze fall to the floor.
“Seen what back then?”
He shrugs lightly, as though he’s unsure of his response, and then he delivers an answer much harsher than you’re anticipating.
“That he doesn’t want to do this.”
There’s a silence in the room as he shuffles around in his seat, and then his eyes flicker over the lens of the camera before you can utter a response.
“You mean… the fame,” you question, your eyebrows knitting together as you ponder his words.
“Boxing,” he clarifies.
The silence grows louder the second time around, and your back rests flat upon the back of the back of the chair as you allow yourself to get a little more situated in your seat.
“He doesn’t want to box anymore,” Mr. Seo repeats, pursing his lips and nodding to affirm his statement. He seems to think for a moment, as though carefully recalling Chan’s words, before elaborating.
“He’s wanted to quit for years now. He gets in these mental slumps, where I can’t get him to do anything. Nobody can. At first, I thought it was just for fear of losing that damn winning streak. I’ve since realized it’s more than that.”
He seems to fix on something in the distance beyond your seated figure, and you shift in your seat nervously, waiting for him to elaborate. When he doesn’t, you nod meekly in his direction, gesturing for him to continue.
“What is it, then?”
Mr. Seo is quiet again, chewing on the inside of his lip as he deciphers an adequate response.
“Tell me,” he begins. “You ever stood in the middle of that ring?”
You think back to all those times with Chan, staring out at the rows of punching bags that line the walls, the gallery of famous boxers peering down over the vast space and the suffocating confines of the wired rope that lines the four corners.
“Yeah,” you say to him. “Few times.”
“What’d it feel like to you?”
Nerve-wracking. Entirely too large- and yet somehow still claustrophobic, all at once. Intimidating, daunting. Voyeuristic.
“It’s awful,” you voice back, swallowing a knot in your throat. “It’s so… public.”
He nods understandingly.
“Fourteen years,” he echoes back. “He’s been under that pressure. On an unbroken winning streak since he started professionally. He’s been dubbed ‘miracle athlete’, ‘athletic genius’- you name it. I’ve never seen him more miserable.”
You don’t say anything just yet, realizing this is exactly what Mrs. Bang couldn’t seem to coax out of him. The harsh reality that although it’s his passion, his lifelong dream to win this title fight, perhaps boxing just doesn’t serve the same purpose it once did for him. It’s now accompanied by the constant expectation to win, the all-consuming fear of what it means to lose, more eyes on him as his private life is publicized and monetized. And now the crushing reality that his reservations surrounding the sport have been televised, much to his utter dismay.
As you make sense of his words, your gaze snaps to the camera, at the blinking red light that indicates this conversation is being recorded, too. Your hand darts out to the shutter release, in an effort to not repeat the same mistakes, and Mr. Seo chuckles when he takes notice of your urgency.
“It’s fine,” he says simply, eyes fixed on the lens again. “He knows I’m airing it all out. It was his request, actually.”
Your motions come to a halt as he speaks of Chan, and you turn to catch his gaze once more, eyebrows arching in an apologetic expression as you find the words to say.
“How is he?” You ask, completely veering off your list of required questions, as you inquire about Bang Chan’s whereabouts.
“It’s been days,” you continue. “I didn’t know they were going to televise all of it. He trusted me, and I get if he doesn’t want anything to do with all of this-”
“He was a little taken aback,” Mr. Seo interjects. “I haven’t heard too much from him, either.”
“You haven’t?” You echo, feeling a pit form in your stomach at the fact that he’s even chosen to distance himself from his trainer in the aftermath.
“Not aside from his request to be as honest with you as possible,” he affirms. “Relay whatever he’s unable to say.”
You’re quiet for a moment, and then you gesture to the camera again.
“You mean… he wants this to be broadcasted?”
He nods, pursing his lips.
You can’t fathom why he’d want this conversation part to be televised, knowing very well that even Chan himself has trouble opening up about the subject. And now he’s urged Mr. Seo to relay these truths to the viewers- the truths that boxing has kept him in a mental slump for the better part of his whole career now. That his favorite sport is just another burden he bears, alongside a long list of fancy titles and recognitions. And that he simply doesn’t want to be a boxer anymore. Confessions that could hurt him preceding the title fight- and may only indicate one final outcome.
“He can’t quit,” you voice quietly. “He wouldn’t just leave all of this behind him… right?”
“It’s hard to say,” Mr. Seo responds. “He’s in another one of his slumps. He’s missing schedules, the fight’s just around the corner. Chan’s done this before, but it seems pretty serious this time around. The whole world’s watching him. I don’t blame him for wanting to walk away from all of this- I would, too.”
The pit in your stomach seems to grow tenfold as he speaks, and despite his assurances to record the conversation, your hand darts out to stop the recording anyway.
“He can’t quit,” you say again. “This is his life’s dream. He said it himself- losing scares the shit out of him. Doesn’t forfeiting fulfill the same thing?”
“I’m sure it does,” he counters, a breathy chuckle escaping his lips. “I’ve talked him out of it a dozen times before. Unfortunately I can’t get through to him this time around.”
Your eyes dart over the camera, and then back to Mr. Seo, as you ponder Chan’s words tirelessly.
Maybe you should’ve seen this coming long before it got to this point- his desire to walk away from all of this has been evident for as long as you’ve known him. The anger that festers deep down inside of him as he throws uppercuts in the ring, the way he gets so fixated on his sport, he shuts out the rest of the world around him. His fear of losing, but also a hatred for winning so consistently. Putting greater trust and vulnerability in a journalist rather than the people he’s known all his life.
Mr. Seo seems to take notice of your distress, cocking his head to meet your gaze which falls onto the tiled floor beneath his leather shoes.
“Hey,” he voices gently. “None of this is your fault. Somebody who’s that down on himself is bound to come to terms with it eventually. He doesn’t resent you, if that’s what you’re so worried about.”
He shuffles in his seat once more, and then he sighs a little before speaking again.
“He has a training session tomorrow, in the evening. If he makes it, you can swing by after and get a word in with him. Just don’t say I sent you.”
You nod at his words, swallowing nervously as you fiddle with the sleeves of your sweater in your lap. And then you meet his gaze once more, furrowing your brows before speaking.
“Mr. Seo,” you begin. “Why wouldn’t he resent me? I’m no better than the spectators. If anything, I’m worse. Chan probably wants me dead as we speak.”
He chuckles lightly before shaking his head.
“You’re just doing your job,” he explains. “Everybody is well aware of that.”
He thinks for a moment, before continuing.
“I haven’t seen him come to terms with his own emotions like this before- maybe ever. All he knew was anger for so long- I saw it from the moment I met him at the tender age of fourteen. He’s finally being honest with himself about what’s causing these mental slumps. It’s a level of vulnerability I’ve never witnessed in him before- it’s hardly possible when he’s constantly being told to ‘man up’ by the rest of the world. Did you know he cried in front of me the other day?”
Mr. Seo shakes his head and crosses his arms over his chest.
“He did, if you can believe it. He really cried.”
And you say nothing, in response, simply thinking back to the sight of Bang Chan crying in front of you first, back at his apartment. The way tears cascaded over his hurt expression, and the way he had sniffled in between shaky confessions that losing is what scares him. Losing a boxing match, losing his passion, losing sight of his future in the careful process of finding himself. Forfeiting the biggest title fight of his life, and walking away from all of this as nothing more than a loser.
And perhaps losing you, too- the one person he still finds some semblance of sacredness in.
“Thank you,” you voice to Mr. Seo, as you reach out to shake his hand. “I’m going to talk to him. I’m going to make this right.”
*
The following evening lulls by painfully slow, as you wait for word from Mr. Seo. Your work doesn’t see you in for the afternoon, as you dismiss yourself early to prepare for the conversation at hand in the comfort of your apartment.
And realistically, what can you say to Bang Chan, to convince him not to walk away from this title fight?
I’m sorry nothing is sacred to you anymore. I’m sorry you’re held to such unsustainable standards. Your mom is right to be worried about you, as is Mr. Seo. But that doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to be frustrated with all of this at the same time. Thank you for letting me bear witness to the real Bang Chan, not just the perfect boxer. You’re far more to me than just a video subject.
It’s nothing he hasn’t heard before, or probably assumed already- but perhaps the future of his career depends on this conversation, and it weighs just as heavy on you, too.
As the evening draws to a close, you’re relieved to hear that Mr. Seo confirms Chan has indeed shown up to his scheduled training session like he’d promised.
“He’s a little down tonight,” he details in a short text to you. “But he’ll be here after hours, if you care to swing by.”
And there’s nothing you would miss the opportunity for, you think to yourself, as you shoot him a quick text back and begin toward the training gym.
Your mind runs rampant with endless possibilities of how the conversation might play out. Perhaps he’ll be angry with you, and send you off with a curt wave of his hand. Maybe he’ll be just as emotional as he was with Mr. Seo, assuming the same disposition he did when he first cried to you that night in his apartment. Or maybe he’ll actually listen to what you have to say, the same way you lent a kindly ear to his vulnerable display of emotions.
It’s hard to say- he’s certainly not an easy read, the way you once presumed him to be.
The gym is void of its usual commotion- in fact, if not granted entry by Mr. Seo first, you’re not sure you would've assumed it to be occupied at all. The entrance is dark, as is the hallway, and you can just barely make out his silhouette when he approaches with a gym bag slung over his shoulder.
“Hey,” Mr. Seo remarks in a low voice. “He’s in the back.”
He looks exhausted, mentally and physically, and though he flaunts a sheen layer of sweat on his forehead from training, he wears it somberly, as though Chan’s emotions have now extended to him.
“How is he?” You inquire cautiously, and Mr. Seo shrugs in response.
“I couldn’t say. He’s hardly talking.”
Your heartbeat quickens suddenly at his words, at the thought that you’re trying to talk him out of something he’s already practically set on, even to his trainer’s standards. Realistically, there’s nothing you can say to change his mind- so does it even make sense to try? Is there a good reason to make an appearance, if at all?
“Y/n?” Mr. Seo questions, taking note of the way your gaze fixes beyond his standing figure at the darkened hallway, almost tuning out his presence.
“Yeah,” you say simply, giving him a small nod. “Thanks for letting me in. I really appreciate it.”
He just nods in response, standing aside to grant you full access. And then he’s off without another word, the low hum of his engine starting up in the parking lot.
The gym has never felt more uninviting than in the current chilling atmosphere, as you stride down the hallway and glance around nervously. The gallery wall of boxers is almost indistinguishable amidst the darkness, except for the beaming white smiles of their prideful expressions staring you down. You’re quickly overtaken by discomfort, as your eyes scan the dark gray walls, at the neat rows of boxers that mimic each other with their wide grins. The winners are hard to tell from the losers, and the losers might as well resemble just any normal spectator. Even the greats are unrecognizable to you, despite your proximity to their elegant portraits. And as hard as you squint at the array of frames above you, Baik Hyun-Man could be any of the boxers on this dreary wall.
It’s not until a loud thump echoes in the distance, that you’re brought back to reality, snapping your head in the direction of the boxing ring. It’s dark, like the rest of the gym, with the exception of the dimly-lit recess lights over the punching bag.
And stood in front of it, knees bent, fists positioned to deliver an uppercut, his jaw clenched and heavy bags under his eyes, Bang Chan.
He produces another hard punch to the bag as you take a reluctant step toward him, and then he hits two more times, the contact echoing around the room in tandem with your strides.
Thump. Step. Thump. Two more steps.
When you’re finally behind the ring, your knees grazing the raised platform, you hoist yourself over the edge, finding your balance to resume approaching him. And Chan’s punches finally come to a halt, his chin tucking over his shoulder as he attempts to catch a glimpse of you without turning around fully.
“Hi,” you say simply, halting your actions of nearing him.
Chan remains like that for a passing moment, scanning your standing figure out of his peripheral vision, before turning back toward the bag. He doesn’t deliver another punch, nor does he make any efforts to distance himself from you. He simply exhales deeply, before speaking.
“What do you want?”
“I want to talk.”
“I don’t have answers for you right now.”
“I’m not interviewing.”
It’s only then that he pivots cautiously on his heels, facing you now, a resigned expression on his face. He’s damp with sweat, glistening under the recess lighting, his thin white tank top practically glued to the convexes of his torso with perspiration.
“Then what do you want?”
“I told you,” you say to him, taking a single step toward him now. “I want to talk.”
His gaze flickers to your hands, which toy nervously with loose threads under the sleeves of your shirt. His lips part to say something, and then he scoffs lightly, before speaking once more.
“What, no camera this time around?”
Your heartbeat quickens at his words, feeling a suffocating sense of guilt as you realize he’s still upset with how the series unfolded in its last broadcast.
“I’m sorry,” is all you can say to him, dropping your hands at your sides in defeat. “I understand you’re angry. I would be, too.”
Chan is quiet for a moment, eyes narrowed as though he’s challenging you.
“I promise I asked them to omit the footage,” you assure him nervously. “It got into the wrong hands.”
And then you take a sharp breath, before continuing.
“I became obsessed,” you say to him. “With the film. With you. I just wanted to know you better. And when I found that you weren’t this superficial shell of a person like I assumed you were, I couldn’t stop myself from feeding into their asks for this voyeuristic glance at your life.”
Chan’s expression seems to soften as he registers your apology. A part of him knows you’re right- and just like Mr. Seo had conveyed, he doesn’t resent you. Because a part of him is a little relieved he got it out there, for the whole world to comprehend just how scared he is of losing. And in turn, how to go about coping with it.
“Well it doesn’t matter anymore,” Chan remarks, his head hanging a little as he toys with the bandages around his wrists. “Because I quit.”
You can feel the room spin around you as his words pierce through your chest- you’d assumed that an apology would perhaps change his mind about the brash decision. Maybe Mr. Seo was wrong about him, and he is still keen on carrying through with a lifelong dream. But as he stands here before you, his gaze locked on his wrists and his shoulders sagging with shame, you know Mr. Seo had the correct read on him, after all.
“You can’t quit,” you utter reluctantly. “You can’t give up your life’s work because you’re afraid of losing.”
“And be made to look like a complete idiot? Yeah, great idea. I’ll be the first boxer to lose a winning streak to a title fight in over 20 years. That makes me a loser in every sense of the word.”
“This fight isn’t about winning it,” you counter. “It’s about showing up. You think your role models won anything by forfeiting?”
“You don’t get it,” He retorts, a frustrated scoff leaving his lips. “You never will. You’re just here to write some story for your own benefit.”
He seems to regret the words when they escape his lips, evident by the way he meets your gaze and toys with the hem of his shirt awkwardly. And he begins to apologize, but not before you’re interrupting him again.
“Write a story?” You repeat with a scoff, taking a single step toward him and narrowing your eyes. “You think I’m just here to write a story? Is that what you think this is?”
“I could never even begin to explain it to you,” Chan says finally, lowering his head in defeat. “Just… forget it.”
The words pierce through your miraculously still-beating heart, and you can almost feel your blood boil when you see him pivot away from you to make his departure.
Your eyes force themselves away from him, far too agitated with the sight of him to even warrant a brief glance in his direction. And as you stare past him at the gray gallery wall, your gaze meets the familiar sight of the monochromatic photograph, the subject beaming down at you while you search for a final word.
“You know what?” You voice to him, sounding much calmer now as you find the confidence to speak. “You are a loser.”
“What?” He questions, halting his steps to turn his head in your direction.
“I called you a loser,” you emphasize, observing the way he turns to face you now. “Any respectable boxer would know that I’ve always been here to tell your story, not conjure up some sensationalized version of it. Forgive me for caring so much about all of this. About you.”
Chan remains quiet, interest piqued at the way you manage to reach a stalemate with your carefully chosen words. And then he plants two feet on the floor, toying with the straps of the boxing bandages around his knuckles, as he turns away from you and begins toward the back of the gym.
“I’m talking to you,” you practically shout, following in his footsteps and pulling yourself through the gap off the raised platform. You stumble as your feet plant themselves onto the floor, and then you walk briskly behind him, eyebrows furrowed crossly as frustrated tears brim your eyes.
“Sure, just walk away from all of this,” you shout at him, growing increasingly irate at the way he struts down the hallways in front of you, not even switching on the lights as you trail behind him.
“And you know what? Your mom is right,” you voice at him loudly. “You are so fucking preoccupied at being the best at what you do, and that’s exactly what brings you down. It’s like pulling teeth trying to talk to you. I’ve seen it in all you pretentious athletes before, but you’re by far the worst.”
Chan turns a corner, still silent at your remarks as he makes his way into a narrow tiled hallway and into the gym showers. The thought crosses your mind to leave, knowing that you have no business following your video subject into the men’s showers. And yet you don’t, maintaining your stance confidently as you watch him toy with the faucet handle on the wall.
“You don’t even realize the way being so cold affects the people around you. The way they so clearly worry about you- and all you can do is dismiss them, and lie to their fucking faces. Everybody’s walking on eggshells around you.”
Chan pushes the steel lever to the right, and you take a step back when the shower head begins to run with a steady stream of water, cascading over his lean figure as he remains standing. You stutter to speak as you watch Chan pull the black t-shirt he wears over his head, discarding it onto the now wet tiled floor and running two hands through his dampened hair.
And your eyes make every effort to refrain from staring too hard at the toned body he reveals to you- dripping in beads of sweat and water alike, trickling down the muscular contours of his chiseled abs and finding purchase along the elastic waistband of his shorts.
The etched convexes of his pectorals flex with subtle movements as his head hangs, brows furrowed in deep concentration as he pulls on the tightly-bound bandages around his knuckles- to no avail, the water drenching them as he continues to tug on them frustratedly.
“I hope you know that the silent treatment won’t do anything for you,” you admonish, approaching him with a single step.
You recall his strong aversion to getting his bandages wet, so instinctively your hands find his, pinching the nylon fabric between your fingers and beginning to undo the bandages around his bruised fingers as his gaze fixes onto yours.
He says nothing, the damp ends of his hair dribbling warm droplets of water onto your shirt as he towers over you, the running shower drowning out the sounds of his heavy breathing as he admires you at this proximity to him.
Your ears are flushed a deep shade of red, still riddled with clear frustration as you rant to him about all his shortcomings- and yet he can’t shake the endearing fact that you’re still helping him, despite the callous words you throw at him.
“Asshole,” he hears you utter, amongst his own deafening thoughts of you. “You can go your whole life running away from all of this whenever you feel the slightest bit threatened, and you might be fooling everybody else, but not me. I know boxing hasn’t inhibited you to be this shell of a human. Good luck with everything,” you snap, pulling the last of the bandage off from around his hands.
“But I hope you know that not even a trophy could refute the fact that you’re a fucking loser.”
Chan lets a breathy chuckle escape his lips, eyes flickering over your pursed lips when you finally crane your neck to look up at him. He’s properly drenched now, strands of hair falling into his face as his expression grows serious.
Neither of you say anything, heavy breaths escaping your parted lips and swirling into each other as he waits for you to make your departure. And yet you don’t, your chest rising and falling with labored breaths as you observe the way his eyelashes glisten under the cascading water. You watch the way the water collects along his philtrum, fusing into one reflective sphere along his top lip and dangling as he searches for the words to say- and he can’t find them, simply shutting his eyes as the water streams over his eyelids, practically forcing them shut.
He waits for the sound of your departing footsteps, or maybe for the shower to shut off if you’re even the slightest bit keen on talking things out.
And yet his body relaxes down into yours when he feels you heighten your still-standing figure, shifting your weight onto the tips of your toes so that you can brush strands of wet hair out of his face.
He shivers in your touch, exhaling a breath he hasn’t realized he’s been holding in this whole time. And then he works against you with ease when you finally press your lips to his, allowing the water to transfer from his open mouth to yours, the salty flavor of his sweat still present on your tongue.
Chan doesn’t say anything when you pull away once more, mentally preparing himself for you to scold him, slap him, something to confirm that you loathe him the way he believes you now do. But it’s the last thing he expects when you cup his face between your hands again, pulling him down toward you and allowing his troubled expression to meet your gaze.
You think to kiss him again, your eyes flickering briefly over his- but you don’t, simply giving him a short nod when you finish speaking.
It’s Chan who opts to kiss you again, with more intensity the second time around, his hands finding the small of your back when he pulls you in against him and allows his lips to work against yours. Your hands press to his toned stomach, grazing fingertips along his flesh as he pulls you a little closer, and you make no effort to push him away or halt your forbidden actions,
Your head is in a daze- somewhere between seething and perhaps also roused as a result of it, knowing very well that this is possibly the worst way you could handle the situation.
He’s stubborn and dejected, and though he knows that being vulnerable is the only way to come to terms with what boxing has become for him, he only seeks resolution by opting to put a lifetime of work behind him. And it’s driving you mad, to practically beg him to let you in like this- yet it feels like the only way to shut yourself up from negotiating with the shell of the man he’s become is to remain exactly like this, your lips on his, hands all over each other, letting gasped breaths escape your lips as he works his kisses along your jawline.
“I missed you,” Chan confesses with a groan as he tilts your face further up between the gentle hold of his thumb and index finger.
You say nothing back, shutting your eyes as you allow his lips to travel down the column of your neck, his hands lowering to find yours and take your wrists in his grasp. He resumes desperate little kisses down your neck, walking you back along the tiled flooring, until your body is effectively slotted between Chan and the wall below the shower head. And when he pulls back momentarily to let his thumbs caress the curves of your hips, the water cascades over you, too, engulfing you in a steady stream of water and wetting the clothes you still wear. Chan watches, mesmerized, as the white fabric of your blouse clings around your body like cellophane, outlining every convex along your flesh, your hair dripping with beads of water and hanging loosely into your face as you look up at him.
“What are you thinking about?” He inquires softly, tucking a strand of hair out of your face.
You pause for a moment, your eyes locked on the droplets of water that trickle down the tiled wall across from you. He scans your expression as he awaits an answer, using his index finger to tilt your face toward him again. The shower seems to drown out in white noise for a moment, Chan’s gaze flickering over your trembling eyes as he waits. Your mind goes back to the feeling of being in that boxing ring- far too big, and yet claustrophobic, at the same time, especially at the thought of hundreds of eyes on you. You think of your camera, and the sight of the little red light blinking to indicate it was recording him, and how it remained angled at him for hours at a time most days, capturing every little movement he produced. You think of the newspaper publications, the faces of the viewers who recognize him in public, even the worried expressions of the people closest to him as he bites back from indulging them in the truth about all of this.
And then you swallow, confidently straightening your posture, as you finally provide an answer.
“I think about you a suffocating amount.”
He cocks his head, rolling his tongue against the inside of his cheek, visibly satisfied with your response.
“Yeah?” He questions. “Missed me that much?”
You let out a small gasp when he lowers his lips to your chest, and then he places a single, open-mouthed kiss on the curve of your breast, his pupils flickering to hold eye contact as he does.
“Maybe,” you breathe back to him, feeling your throat still bubble with vexation. “Of course maybe I was just looking forward to watching your fight.”
He places another kiss, and then another, and then several more, traveling inward until he’s just between the valley of your breasts. And then he lifts his head up again, grazing over your parted lips, but not yet kissing you.
“I’m afraid of what will happen,” he says in almost a whisper, toying with the damp hem of your blouse.
And Chan smiles between the tender kiss when you pull him back down and indulge him anyway, allowing the indignation you feel at the hands of him to be replaced by the pulsing sensation between your legs, shutting up your thoughts with the erotic sight of him shirtless, hands all over your wet body as you melt into his touch.
“Then do it afraid,” you tell him.
You breathe between heavy kisses as his hands snake down to your blouse, rolling buttons between the pads of his fingers to undo them. He hums into the kiss when you do, letting your hands tangle in his hair as the final button is undone, your blouse hanging open loosely and exposing your chest to the cold water that continues to streamline over your desperate bodies.
You can feel Chan smirk into the kiss, entirely too satisfied with the method you’ve both chosen to adjourn this prolonged chapter of tension that seems to exist every time he’s near- of words unspoken, knowing looks and stories that barely scrape the surface of who he really is. And though you’re still peeved at his reluctance, it feels right to be all over him like this- perhaps this is the closest you’ll ever get to him, when he’s looming over you with every desire to undress you and know the curves of your body as intimately as you long to know his mind.
The thoughts agitate you the more you ruminate on them, and yet every annoyance is shut up by the sensation of his mouth working against yours, hands snaking down to the small of your back again where he sprawls his fingertips out over the goosebumps raised along your skin.
Of course Chan will never admit that perhaps this is the closest he’s ever gotten to letting somebody into the innermost complexities of his mind- but still, he’s well aware that the desire to let you in is heightened by the reality that he wants you to know him fully.
“Is this okay?” he breathes again, as his fingers graze a little lower, his touch sending shivers down your spine.
The audible groan you emit practically relays an answer to him already, yet he smiles devilishly in response to your clear frustration, your hand tracing eagerly along the waistband of his shorts. You don’t have to advance any lower to know that he’s definitely hard for you- it’s clear in the way he whimpers at the near-contact, his breathing growing ragged when you hum softly into his mouth and tug at his hair a little.
“Answer me,” Chan commands, his hands finding their way to your pants and toying similarly along your waist. Your hand rests atop his, guiding him to pull them lower as if granting him permission, and then he wastes no time discarding them entirely, tugging the soaked fabric that clings to your thighs harshly down your body and allowing them to pool around your ankles.
“Yes, it’s okay,” you gasp, moaning softly when his lips reattach to your neck.
Your lingerie is already soiled, clinging tightly against the outline of your body, and Chan’s clothes now clearly outline his fully-erect cock, strained against the thin fabric of his shorts and desperate for some release.
The shower temperature seems to have risen several degrees with the passing time, cascading over you with almost scalding water as you feel Chan’s hands lower to take yours in his. He caresses your wrists as he pulls away from your lips momentarily, and then he spins you around to press you gently against the wall, his lips finding purchase in the shell of your ear as he prods into your lower thigh from behind. He feels big against you, his whole body indicating his clear desire to take you right here, in the hardly-private environment of the gym showers, and you shiver when you feel him work kisses down the column of your neck once more, now latching your flesh between his teeth to suck a line of bruises where his lips trail.
The reality crosses your mind again, briefly, that you’re definitely not supposed to be getting physically intimate with an interview subject for a second time now. But when his hands trail down to trace behind the strap of your bra, tugging on the fabric until his nimble fingers are working over the clasp, you don’t dare utter a single word of protest at him.
Unlike the way he retracts from opening himself up to you, his movements now are purposeful. He knows what he wants in the way he so skillfully undoes the clasp of your bra, letting it fall to the floor in a puddle of water as his hands now find the mounds of your breasts. And he has clear intentions when he then slips his hands into the sides of your panties and tugs harshly, letting those pool around your ankles too, now, his hands massaging the curves of your ass as you arch instinctively and wait for him to continue.
“Will you let me return the favor now?” Chan asks boldly when his hands travel back to his own shorts. He touches himself over the fabric of his shorts, cupping a hand around his own hard girth to then stroke himself with just enough pressure to coax a heavy exhale from the back of his throat. And when you nod beneath his touch, swallowing the shower water that dribbles from between your lips to rest upon your tongue, his fingers find your face, tilting just enough to meet your gaze with his.
“I didn’t hear you,” Chan states, not yet undressing himself. “Say it.”
“Yes,” you breathe back, hoping the impatience in your voice isn’t picked up so easily in your tone. You’d beg him to fuck you if you weren’t already begging him to let down his stubborn walls.
He smirks at your near-desperation, and then his hands resume the action of gliding upon the grooves on the elastic waistband of his shorts- only this time, he tugs them down in tandem with his boxers, allowing his exposed erection to grow against his abdomen as his clothes fall to the tile beneath him. His hand wraps itself around the base of his cock, positioning himself behind you and pumping himself a few times. And then before he makes any move to enter you, his hand slots itself between your legs, resting along your upper thigh as he presses a chaste kiss to your shoulder.
“I still think you’re a loser,” You say to Chan, for the second time now, gasping when you feel his fingers graze your clit and rub in circular motions. “If you walk away from all of this.”
“Yeah?” he says with a breathy chuckle, pressing a series of open-mouthed kisses along your shoulder. “Is this your way of saying you care about me?”
“Hardly,” you breathe back, eyebrows arching in pleasure when he quickens the pace of his movements.
“I see the way you look at me,” Chan whispers against the shell of your ear. “Either you’re really passionate about this story,” his fingers prod against your entrance, gathering the slick of your arousal onto the pads of his fingers before dipping them into your cunt and smiling when you gasp in response. “Or you’re just as drawn to me as I am to you.”
“Am I right?” He says when you arch back against him, gasping as he moves his fingers in, and then out, swirling them around your clit and back inside of you once more. “Tell me,” he continues. “Do you always get this wet for the people you interview?”
“Don’t flatter yourself,” you breathe back, your chest rising and falling with every labored breath as he resumes his thrusting motions in a rhythmic pattern. “You’re the one who drags me everywhere with you like I’m your fucking assistant.”
“You could’ve declined,” Chan says plainly, his tongue finding your neck and tracing along your throat in one long stripe, before latching his teeth around the flesh as he had previously. “I think you just like me.”
You begin to respond, quickly unable to as he thrusts his fingers at a particularly fast pace now, your words coming out as a series of high-pitched moans, instead. You silently pray he can’t tell you’re enjoying this entirely too much.
He pulls his fingers out again, and you spread your thighs a little to grant him access to your clit once more, yet he doesn’t indulge you, simply letting his hand find your waist again and caressing your damp skin.
“Why’d you stop?” You say a little too abruptly, earning a chuckle from him as his hand wraps around the base of his cock.
“Someone’s eager,” Chan remarks, and you mentally scold yourself for audibly sounding it.
“Just hurry up, will you?”
His hand caresses the vein that runs along his shaft, thumb toying with his pink tip as he hums in response to your anticipation. And then he pauses again, before tilting your head up to meet his gaze.
You watch as Chan’s neck cranes up, too, his adam’s apple bobbing outwardly as he faces up at the shower head that continues to shoot a steady stream of water over your tangled bodies. He shuts his eyes momentarily, allowing the water to cascade in two streams down his cheeks now as it makes contact over his pronounced nose bridge. And then you watch his plump lips part above you, the flow of water merging into one steady stream once more as he lets it fill his mouth, his chin almost trembling as he struggles to take it all in one mouthful, quickly spilling over and dribbling down his chin. He doesn’t swallow the mouthful, he doesn’t dispose of it as he turns to meet your gaze again. Instead, he angles your face toward him with the gentle maneuver of his thumb on your chin, his lips pulling as much as they can into a cocky grin as he cups your face and allows your mouth to remain agape for him.
No words are exchanged as he partakes in the lewd action of allowing the water to dribble down into your mouth, strings of saliva accompanying the salty taste of his sweat and the metallic taste of gym shower water. He allows his mouth to fully empty into yours, guiding strings of saliva back between your parted lips when your respective mouthful begins to spill over, too. And then as the caress of his thumb along your chin instructs you non-verbally to swallow it, to let the concoction dribble down to the back of your throat and glide with ease past your trembling lips, he’s guiding himself inside of you at the same time, his hands spreading your thighs as he guides his cock into your entrance and holds it there for a still moment.
You want to verbally remark how big he feels inside of you, but you can’t speak just yet as you swallow the remainder of his saliva, gasping for a breath when he pulls back to then thrust into you with a little more force. And then his hand reaches around to your clit once more, the pads of his fingers working you in circles again as he begins to move with rhythmic motions.
“Are you okay?” Chan asks in a gentle voice, as he gathers your hair with his vacant hand, draping it over your shoulder to press a chaste kiss against your neck.
You nod quickly in response, far too overcome by the sheer pleasure of his flesh working in and out of your glistening walls to give him a proper answer, and he takes the heavy panting that escapes your lips as answer enough.
“God you feel so fucking good,” Chan remarks, as he gives your hair a little tug. “I’ve been thinking about this. About you.”
He lets his eyes shut in a blissful state of euphoria as he fucks you, satisfied groans escaping his lips as his fingers grasp at your flesh eagerly, careful not to loosen his hold on you as though he might lose you.
And then before he can ponder the implications of his breathless speech, he’s breaking the silence again, regret overtaking his dizzied state the moment he speaks again.
“What are you thinking about?”
The words are near insensitive as it now stands, and Chan knows very well that he’s going to be met with some version of dispute from your breathless figure. But you surprise him for the second time this evening, when you don’t argue against his callous actions, instead letting your lips part in pleasure as you breathe out a response.
“You,” the simple answer conveys. And Chan can feel his cock twitch inside of you at the admission, another groan escaping his parted lips as he feels himself grow twice as roused at the fact that he consumes your thoughts just as much as you do his.
Between the rhythmic sounds of his groans that precede your gasps for air, muffled by the steady stream of the shower that nearly drowns out your voices the same way the pleasure nearly drowns out your thoughts, you feel his hand reach around to grasp your fingers between his. He gives it a gentle squeeze as he angles your parted legs toward the shower stream, letting the water cascade in a pulsing vibration directly on your clit. And the dizzying sensation of your joint frustration and pleasure only reminds you that the thoughts are not limited to just him.
Thinking about Bang Chan extends far beyond just the charming public figure he now is- they exist in a capacity much larger than a longing to know him for the purposes of any stupid docuseries. The thoughts of him transcend the superficial established connection of a subject behind a camera lens- instead, you long to know the very intricacies of his consciousness, to pick his mind and comprehend his real fears, his hangups, his shortcomings and his plan for a life beyond this one. It’s a longing to know him beyond just his tales of guts and glory, and this life he’s so scrupulously centered around his boxing career.
He’s purposeful- in his strategy and his movements, and you’re quickly brought back to the gym locker showers when you feel him spread your lips a little wider toward the shower stream, earning a fervent moan from you as you feel his cock twitch again inside of you.
“Fuck,” Chan exhales, through gritted teeth, as he staves off his orgasm momentarily.
He observes the way your eyebrows arch in sheer pleasure, all fucked-out as you take him so obediently and allow the shower to pleasure you where he can’t. And then he angles your face toward him as he indulges you in one final sloppy kiss against your parted lips, the lewd remnants of sweat and spit and water still exchanging from his body onto yours.
“I’m sorry,” is all Chan can breathe against your lips, as he assists you in reaching your finish, giving your hand an affirming squeeze as your legs tremble in his touch, your walls contracting around his cock, as the shower water that cascades onto the floor is now mixed with your juices and and the echoing sounds of your high-pitched moans. And Chan nibbles on the lobe of your ear, confessing a string of apologies as he reaches his finish now, too, filling your still-aching body with his load and not loosening his grasp around your fingers.
Before pulling out, his trembling hand finds the steel handle of the shower, which he pushes into an ‘off’ position once more, before relaxing his figure against yours, hands finding purchase on your hips as you both catch your breath.
The tiled room grows much quieter now as heavy breaths escape both of your parted lips, chests rising and falling against each other as his chin rests on your shoulder.
The stream of the shower has now reduced to the repetitive tap of dripping water along the floor, echoing in the near-silence of the steamy room as you remain pressed against each other, bodies languid and far too drained of your frustrations to speak.
And yet amidst the eerie silence of the room, Chan speaks in a voice above a whisper, his fingertips intertwining with each other as he tightens his grasp around your frame.
“I’ll do it,” he says breathlessly, taking your hand in his and bringing it up to his lips for a tender kiss to your knuckles.
“Do what?” You challenge, reaching up to tuck a strand of hair out from his eyes.
He chuckles softly, cocking his head as you await a response.
“Say it,” you reiterate, and he rolls his eyes playfully before answering.
“I’ll do the fight,” Chan says finally, his shoulders seeming to relax when he comes down to rest his forehead against yours. “I’ll show up, and I’ll do this match.”
His head hangs as his figure towers over yours, fingers giving yours a little squeeze before he finishes speaking.
“And we can finish telling this story together.”
And the gentle gargle of the shower drain succeeds his words, disposing a mix of sweat and water and arousal alike.
*
GOLDEN GLOVES CHAMPIONSHIP TITLE FIGHT- BANG CHAN VS. KANG-DAE
It’s not unusual for boxers to flaunt a long list of rituals on fight days. Some have particular food specifications the night before, others ensure a strict routine of stretches. You distinctly recall a few playlists shared by previous athletes you’ve interviewed, and even lucky articles of clothing for others.
For Bang Chan, sherbet popsicles are a considerable factor in his pre-boxing rituals. And yet for the first time in his career, they’re unavailable to him.
“You tried the convenience stores on the south side?” He asks again, pacing back and forth as Mr. Seo slings his belongings into a gray storage locker.
“All sold out,” Mr. Seo explains. “There’s a few similar ones in the freezer at the back. Not sure if you wanna give those a try.”
Bang Chan thinks it over momentarily, electing not to respond as frustratedly as he wants to. And then he shoves his hands in the pockets of his gym shorts, hanging his head in defeat.
All around him, the hallways of the stadium are teeming with movement- from security in black jumpsuits traversing the rooms, sports commentators readying their equipment, makeup artists organizing their respective supplies. Even Mr. Seo seems to be heads-down in his own tasks, hardly uttering words of consolidation as he makes his way over to another staff member.
And all Chan can do is simply wait, in the green room, for further direction, as he tries his best not to get in the way. Mr. Seo had once described this part of the process as a “hurry up and wait” sort of phenomenon- something Chan never fully understood until he was participating in some of his biggest fights to date. The makeup artists will usher him to a swivel chair, where they’ll begin with a base of primer on his face, and then they’re gone again, disappearing to retrieve more supplies from beyond the green room. Staff members will begin to explain the timeline of this evening’s events, and then they’re quickly caught up in an entirely different conversation, not even completing their sentences before they’re a whole room away from him.
Even Mr. Seo will begin a pep talk, reminding Chan to “loosen up”, and that “whatever happens, happens”- and then he’s absent once again, too, quickly reminded of something he’s forgotten back at his designated locker.
So all Chan can do is wait, his eyes scanning rows of photographs that line the unfamiliar walls of this foreign stadium.
He’s entirely riddled with fear, the way he always is before a fight. Yet his thoughts are also plagued with you, and you, and more of you, as he recalls the way all of his previous evenings alongside you had unfolded.
Perhaps all of the desperate kisses you’d exchanged, and the now several times you allowed him to return the favor, served as pre-ritual enough for Chan, who practically bites back a smile when he remembers the way your delicate fingers weaved between his, reassuring him for one final time that he’s not a loser for showing up.
All of your sagely words circle his mind as though he’s indulging himself once more in the sacred moment of a boy and his favorite sherbet popsicle- apologetic confessions that he’d become an object of fascination for you. A myriad of shaky words detailing a sheer gratitude for allowing you to know him this intimately, the way he’s been withholding from the people closest to him. And although his truths had been publicly broadcast, a newfound appreciation for this level of vulnerability.
And he’s quickly brought back to reality when Mr. Seo makes his entrance again, folded blue satin grasped tightly in his hold.
“Robe’s here,” Mr. Seo explains, as he nears Chan’s seated figure. Chan cranes his neck to catch a glimpse of the familiar article of clothing- blue, upon his mother's particular liking to his first pair of sparring mitts.
The whole room seems to halt their actions and stare when Chan finally rises from his seat, pulling his ribbed white tank top off over his torso with the swift motion of a hand. And beneath the bright lights of the green room, a series of camera flashes illuminates the space around him, as they capture the first moments he’s finally undressed.
“Arms out,” Mr. Seo commands.
He assists in pulling the robe over Chan’s broad shoulders, smoothing down the silken fabric as Chan adjusts the collar.
Another staff member unbeknownst to Chan gestures for his hands, where she begins to wrap nylon around his knuckles. One more readies his boxing gloves, pulling open the velcro from around the closure strap.
Makeup artists begin to circle him again, brushing powder along his nose and instructing him to pout his lips for chapstick.
As they prepare him for the biggest title fight of his career, Chan can still only think of you.
He knows you’re prohibited from interacting prior to the fight- rules which you mutually opted to establish, knowing it would be entirely too difficult to conceal your emotions in the presence of each other. But the fact stands, that he misses you, and that in the absence of his typical pre-fight ritual, you’re the only other means of instilling a sense of calmness within him.
“Kang-Dae’s already here,” Mr. Seo then says, as he fastens the strings of Chan’s robe.
“He’s here?” Chan echoes, eyes widening as the realization sets in.
He pictures the green room opposite to his in the stadium; it’s probably just as busy, with staff members working to prepare Kang-Dae for what will also be the biggest fight of his career. Chan realizes for the first time that he’ll be face to face with the same figure he’s spoken so highly of, the same person he’s made strategic efforts not to run into, and the same person he’ll now be facing in the ring- not just a practice match against Mr. Seo, or even a punching bag.
“He arrived not long ago,” Mr. Seo explains. “We have 15 minutes until entrance.”
Chan rotates his hands, at the staff’s request, as they fasten the black sparring mitts around his fists. And then his gaze falls to the mirror across from him as another stripe of powder is brushed along his nose.
His eyes scan his own standing figure for a moment- he looks taller than usual, and stronger, his shoulders pulling back as the blue satin robe hangs loosely around his toned body. His hair is smoothed back again with a gel comb, his shoes knotted three times at the laces.
And then his gaze falls to the standing figure behind him, as you make entrance into the green room at last, a colleague by your side and a team of cameras filing in after you.
“… you can begin setting up in ten,” a staff member directs them, gesturing to the hallway beyond them.
You do your best to register the instructions, nodding your head as they speak right past you, yet completely unable to do so, as Chan’s lips pull into a closed-lip smile.
He can say nothing at the sight of you, simply admiring the elegant black double-breasted dress you sport, your hair pulled back to flaunt a sophisticated makeup look. And your eyes remain locked with his for a passing moment, as you examine his appearance in all its glory- the way the blue satin robe falls loosely around his chiseled abs, the glow of his makeup under the bright lightning, even the new sight of his gelled hair, pushed out of his face to reveal his handsome features to you.
He hardly looks familiar to you this way- much less like the Chan you know at the proximity of his lips on yours, and more like renowned boxer Bang Chan, the way the rest of the world refers to him.
Mr. Seo seems to take notice of Chan’s eyes on yours, his gaze flickering over Chan’s intense stare in the mirror and then around to you, who scrambles to face your camera crew once more. He smooths down the collar of Chan’s robe one last time, giving him a pat on the shoulders, and then he calls out to the nearby staff in a moment of understanding.
“Let’s give Bang Chan a moment,” he says, gesturing to the hallway with a cock of his head. “We’ll make entrance in ten.”
The makeup crew packs the last of their belongings, shuffling out with briefcases of pallets and brushes. Security assume their positions just past the door in the hallway, shutting the heavy steel door behind them, and Mr. Seo leads the rest of the crew out, shooting Chan a small wink as he observes you maintain a safe distance from Chan.
When the green room is finally cleared, the steel door shutting fully with an echoing thud, Chan pivots to face you, leaning back on the vanity, his hands shoved into the pockets of his robe.
“Hi,” he muses curiously.
You take several steps toward him, arms crossed at the elbows, and then you halt in front of him, tilting your head up to meet his gaze.
“You look cool,” you tell him, the corners of your lips pulling up into a smile. “Like a winner.”
He chuckles softly, standing up straight now, his broad figure towering over you as he maintains an amused smile. He begins to close the gap between your smiling figures, but you reach a hand out to stop him, sprawling your fingers out across his stomach and pushing him away lightly.
“You can’t kiss me,” you say to him. “It’s bad luck.”
“Oh really?” Chan questions. “Says who?”
“Says me,” you voice back, chuckling softly in response. “You just got your makeup done. And I don’t want to run the risk of being seen by somebody.”
“There’s nobody around,” he emphasizes, taking your hands in his. “Besides, the makeup’s going to get ruined enough as it is.”
“Still,” you say to him, reaching up to run a finger along his gelled hair. He searches for the words to refute your argument again, but instead he’s silent, cocking his head to observe your expression.
“If I can’t kiss you,” he begins. “I think it’s only fair that you indulge me in a story. For good luck.”
You smile up at him, thinking it over a second. He rubs his fingers over yours tenderly as he awaits a response, and then his expression grows serious again when you begin to produce one.
“In 1988, Baik Hyun-Man was the first heavyweight boxer of his kind to make it to the Olympics. He trained for an incredible amount of time, and he swept in his division that same year.”
Chan nods as you speak, recounting the tale in his own mind.
“Two years later, he retired. And the world didn’t know what to make of him. In his final speech to the world, he detailed his reasoning- that maybe through tales of his, of guts and glory,”
“… we find our footing in the knowledge that we tried,” Chan finishes.
He says nothing as your lips pull into a smile, mirroring his.
And then he gives you an understanding nod, as a knock is heard on the steel door, indicating time for his entrance.
*
The arena is almost deafening with heavy anticipation when you finally make your entrance, assuming a reserved spot at the front, amidst the rows of occupied seats. Spectators sport face paint and signs, balancing buckets of popcorn in their elbows and chugging gargantuan cups of soft drinks and alcohol. The chatter of sports commentators can already be heard overhead as they detail the sight to viewers at home. And as you glance around the arena, you can’t help but worry for Chan, who you know already feels suffocated enough in the confines of the practice gym.
The same emotions you harbor when staring out at the gym are elevated- perhaps tenfold, as you lose sight of the rows in the shadows beyond the bright white recess lighting. Your cameras are set up alongside you by the crew, who assemble the tripods and angle the lens toward the ring.
And you watch nervously, waiting for sight of Chan’s entrance. Your eyes scan the sea of people, who talk excitedly amongst themselves, and then back to the boxing ring, which seems to glow under the blinding white lights- and then your attention is drawn back to the seat beside you, as a figure shuffles past toward you.
“Mrs. Bang!” You exclaim, bowing graciously as she mirrors your action.
“So good to see you again!” she states, a warm smile on her face. “We’re sitting just that way.”
She points to the right of your spot, and beyond rows of fans, you can clearly locate what appears to be the rest of Chan’s family, who greet you with smiles and excited waves.
“Wow, there’s so many of you,” you say back to her, chuckling lightly as you wave them down.
“We’ve never missed a match,” she explains. “He always knows where to find us.”
The statement is comforting to you, as you recall how nervous Chan is to have hundreds of eyes on him at any given moment- at least among a sea of spectators, he can always still count on a few familiar faces rooting for him.
“Listen,” she begins to say. “I wanted to thank you for this whole film. We had a long conversation about it, following the second part of his series. I always knew it was taxing for him- I guess I just hadn’t realized how scared he was of all this.”
She lowers her voice to just above a whisper, glancing nervously at her side, before continuing to speak.
“It was eye-opening for all of us, to view it from a different perspective. We all want him to win- just not at the cost of his well being.”
You’re quick to shake your head, shooting her an understanding smile.
“I wanted to apologize to you- I didn’t know they were going to air a lot of it,” you tell her. “I didn’t mean for his secrets to be so… televised.”
“Don’t apologize,” Mrs. Bang reassures you. “It’s the kind of honesty nobody’s been able to coax out of him before. Sure, it reached a lot of people. But it was bound to, considering how long he’s kept all of this from us. Sometimes when we’re most vulnerable, it’s the only time we’re able to truly understand what we want.”
You ponder her words momentarily, not yet separating from her gaze, as her lips pull into a small smile. You see a lot of Chan in her- restless when she’s distressed, and yet a robust willingness to decipher a meaning from all of the pain. She’s enchanting the same way Chan is- it’s no wonder he holds his family so close to his heart.
“Thank you,” is all you can utter in reply, as she reaches out a hand to give your forearm a squeeze.
“Whatever happens tonight,” she voices. “I’m glad we got to tell this story. I think you’ve done a fine job at knowing him.”
You return her words with a smile of your own, your eyes darting back to the ring, where staff members circle about and make their final preparations.
“It’s not over yet,” you remind her. “We’re still telling it.”
And she shoots you a knowing wink, as she bows graciously and begins back toward her designated seating.
*
When the spotlight illuminates over the west wing of the arena, the rest of the venue goes dark, crescendoed chatter making itself known all around you as fans eagerly await the entrance of both athletes.
“… tonight’s biggest match of the year here at the Golden Gloves Championship,” you can hear a commentator announce from the platform far above you.
“Bang Chan vs. Kang-Dae, a battle of undefeated superstars, scheduled for 12 rounds of boxing. Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce to you our participants in tonight’s main show.”
All eyes seem to shift nervously over the west wing, squinting amidst the contrast lighting to make out whose entrance will precede the next. And when the commentator begins to speak again, your heart practically drops in your chest, when you observe the first.
“Introducing to you first, on my right, fighting out of the red corner, wearing red mitts,” he begins. “A campaign record of 23 wins, 19 coming by way of knockout. Please welcome the hard-hitting, former lightweight champ of the second division, boxer Kang-Dae.”
Your eyes fall to his looming figure on the left, observing the way he jogs in place, a bright red robe draped over his muscular build as he wears a cocky smile on his face.
He sports a shaved head, cracking his neck with a jerky movement of his neck, his buff build flexing beneath the overhead lights. If you’d previously assumed Chan to assume the appearance of an arrogant athlete, Kang-Dae’s definitely broken that record now, made even more clear in the way he raises his fists to the audience and circles the ring as they cheer for him.
“And on my left,” the commentator begins, your head snapping to the other side of the ring.
“Fighting out of the blue corner, wearing blue mitts, completely undefeated in his division on a rampant winning-streak. A total of 40 wins, 26 coming by way of knockout, we welcome the electrifying king of boxing and rising star to fame, champion boxer Bang Chan.”
The lights are illuminated over Chan’s standing figure now, and your heart skips several beats when you witness his powerful stance in all its glory, for the first time in a professional setting.
Chan adjusts the velcro around his wrists, pulling it taut between his teeth, craning his neck out at the audience, before raising a single fist and shooting the spectators a nervous, closed-lip smile.
The crowd is much louder this time around, the entire arena erupting in a sea of applause and cheers, as he rolls his shoulders back now, his gaze finally falling onto Kang-Dae’s.
You reckon you could cut the tension with a knife when they make visual contact, their eyes darting over each other’s statures and mentally relaying words of self-righteousness at one another. Although Bang Chan is visibly nervous, he looks angry, the same way he does when he’s throwing punches in the practice ring. As they approach each other at the center, your gaze is drawn back to the referee, who holds a hand out in front of each of their figures, beginning to voice a list of rules.
“Touch ‘em up,” he tells them, as you watch them raise their mitts to make contact just once, before retreating to their respective corners.
The noise is drowned out momentarily amidst your own thoughts, eyes scanning nervously over Chan’s figure, as you watch Mr. Seo fit a mouth guard over his teeth. He talks loudly over the deafening cheers as he relays some form of instruction to him, giving his shoulders an affirming tap and gesturing to Kang-Dae.
Your own gaze falls to your camera crew, who meticulously adjust the lenses to not miss a second of Chan’s movements, and you chew the inside of your lip nervously as you wait for him to assume his position. On the overhead screen, you crane your neck up to catch a glimpse of their names in flashy text, illustrating ROUND 1 alongside a headshot you’ve never seen of Bang Chan.
And then before your gaze falls over his figure once more, the double chime of a boxing bell fills the room loudly, indicating start time for the two.
It happens faster than you were prepared for, when Kang-Dae lunges forward to deliver a harsh hook, just barely missing Bang Chan as they begin to circle around each other.
Both sides of the arena are equally deafening, fans practically rising from their seats to cheer for either member. Chan’s movements to dodge Kang-Dae are swift, yet sharp, as his blue mitts conceal his serious expression, his tongue rolling once over the harsh blue color of his mouth guard.
“Approaching the midway point of a cautious start to the first round,” a commentator states. “There’s a jab, from Bang Chan in the blue. Who just barely misses Kang-Dae’s dodge- folks, do you see that footwork?”
The screen overhead now displays a timer- 45 seconds left of round one, and you turn to your own cameras when you take note, observing the way Lin fidgets with the pan arm.
“He’s being careful,” Lin comments. “We should start seeing more action by round 3.”
Your lips part to say something, but you simply turn back to the ring again, eyes darting briefly over the screen.
20 seconds, 19, 18…
“It’s neutral,” another commentator states. No one’s attempting to put the other out just yet.”
14, 13, 12…
“Listen for that bell, gentleman,” the referee announces.
“A landing jab, from Bang Chan on the right! And time, right there.”
As both boxers return to their places, you can see Mr. Seo approach Chan, who assumes a spot on a little stool in his corner, exhaling sharply before he’s quickly surrounded.
“Perfect start,” Mr. Seo tells him, pulling the mouth guard out from between his teeth. “He’s gonna start making some hard moves at you. We’re looking for counters, right? Just be relaxed, and be light on your feet.”
Bang Chan nods, as somebody to the right of him brings forward a sports water bottle and gestures for him to take a swig. When he pulls away once more, they reach out to wipe a drop from the corner of his mouth. Another figure behind him runs what appears to be a bag of ice over the back of his neck, giving him a quick massage, before retracting.
Chan doesn’t say anything for the duration- he simply nods, seemingly regulating his breathing and focusing on Mr. Seo’s advice.
And when the break is called to an end, both parties meet at the middle of the ring again, as the referee ushers for them to start round 2.
The boxing bell is just as jarring the second time around, a double chime echoing loudly throughout the arena. And this time, Chan doesn’t waste a second lunging at Kang-Dae first, his fist making robust contact with his opponent’s stocky build, a loud thump revertebrating from the hit.
Kang-Dae seems to duck as he does, his fists coiling around Chan’s waist, as he holds him tightly in his grip and shoves him forward, earning the attention of the referee, who holds out two hands to stop them both.
“Stop, stop,” he calls out. “Not another until I say go,” he explains. And the two shoot furious looks at each other, before the referee announces “go!” once more. Kang-Dae dodges a series of quick punches from Chan, whose footwork remains light and skillful, as he circles the perimeter of the ring.
“Bang Chan utilizing lateral movement along the ropes,” a commentator says loudly. “Now, Kang-Dae is still excellent coming off the ring.”
Kang-Dae quickly coils his mitts around Bang Chan a second time, swiftly pushing him forward once more, and the referee is louder when he admonishes a second time.
“Back,” he tells Kang-Dae aggressively. “Can’t tie him in a hold.”
At a minute-thirty into the match, Chan delivers another punch, this time landing hard.
And with bated breath, you watch as Kang-Dae takes a harsh tumble to Chan’s left hook, quickly pulling himself off the floor again and retreating to his corner.
The audience erupts in roaring cheers as Chan adjusts the waistband of his shorts, rolling his tongue again over his mouth guard. The referee says something indistinguishable to Kang-Dae, who nods furiously in response, and then they meet in the middle of the ring again.
“After a slow start to round 1, Bang Chan drops Kang-Dae in round 2, marking only the second time to occur in his career,” the commentator announces. “We’re at 15 seconds left now.”
Both continue dodging a series of punches and circling each other, with neither delivering another jab as ceremonious as Chan’s for the remainder of round two. And then the referee calls time again, as the boxing bell chimes five times now, and they retreat to their corners once more.
While their respective teams make haste to tend to both athletes, the large screens overhead project highlights from round two in slow motion. You watch proudly as the recap shows Chan deliver a particularly harsh jab to Kang-Dae’s chest, lunging him backward until his footing is lost, his muscular thighs making contact with the floor of the ring. While he’s quick to get back up again, his expression is irate, and Chan does a perfect job of maintaining his stance when he attempts to hit back ten times harder.
“Focus,” Kang-Dae’s trainer tells him, as another member dabs at the beads of sweat that line his brow. “Don’t think about his campaigns. This is about you. Remember- he’s scared. Take advantage of it. Get up. Man up.”
Kang-Dae hardly produces an answer, simply grunting, as the mouth guard is pulled from between his teeth.
“He’s fast,” he says between labored breaths.
“Then be faster.”
On the opposing side of the ring, Mr. Seo pats Chan’s knee, pulling out his mouth guard and allowing him a swig of water.
“Atta boy,” he says to him. “Don’t overcommit. Perfect energy.”
Chan simply nods, rolling his shoulders back, as he’s massaged in the remaining seconds. And then they’re at the center of the ring once more, as the referee calls for round three.
*
Five rounds in, Bang Chan continues to take lead of the match, delivering a sharp uppercut to Kang-Dae’s jaw, which precedes another series of smaller punches.
The crowds seem to be much louder for Chan, his punches eliciting excited reactions from all over the arena as he throws hit after hit, and Kang-Dae’s expression appears defeated each time he retreats to his corner.
“Keep it coming,” Mr. Seo tells him. “Watch for those counters. Your hooks are perfect.”
He appears more breathless each time he hoists his body over the little stool, simply nodding in response to the praise around him. And right before the sixth match, he cranes his neck, as though he’s looking for somebody in the crowd of people. His eyes tremble as he scans over the east wing, and then the west wing, his staff members practically pivoting his body back in place to hydrate and clean him of sweat.
“Focus,” Mr. Seo says, forcing his gaze back upon him. Chan nods sheepishly- but Mr. Seo is well aware that Chan seems to be seeking you out amidst the crowd, a sort of desperation present within him like he’s never observed before.
He’s competent in this evening’s fight, but he also appears distracted, like there might be something more important to be found in your presence rather than the biggest fight of his life.
And ten rounds in, Mr. Seo’s theory proves correct when Chan’s performance begins to falter.
He fumbles a little in response to Kang-Dae’s swift attempts at a landing jab- and consequently, just enough to permit contact, failing to dodge when he produces a sharp uppercut to Chan’s left side.
It feels as though it’s another slow-motion replay when you watch it unfold, observing the way Chan’s whole body jerks to the left, his eyes squeezing shut and a stream of saliva escaping from between his parted lips. He successfully dodges another one at 10 seconds to the round’s conclusion, but he’s visibly rattled when they finally call for a break.
“Easy,” Mr. Seo instructs the staff who assist him onto the stool and pull his mouth guard away, strings of saliva finding purchase on his chin and then swiftly wiped off.
“What was that?” Mr. Seo questions. He’s stern, but still gentle in his speech, and Chan just shakes his head in response.
“Spit,” a staff member chimes in. Chan turns his head to expel a thick mix of saliva and bright crimson blood into a bucket, and then he holds it agape for a swig of water, swishing it over a deep cut on his inner lip before swallowing.
“Listen, you’re getting shaky out there,” Mr. Seo tells him. “What’s going on?”
“Where’s y/n?” Chan interjects, earning a deep sigh from Mr. Seo, who simply shrugs with his hands on his hips.
“Doesn’t matter,” he counters. “Don’t get distracted now. We’ve got three rounds left to win this thing.”
Chan’s shoulders seem to sag in disappointment, attempting to peer over his shoulder again for a glimpse of you, but Mr. Seo is quick to force Chan’s gaze back to him again.
“Listen to me,” he says sharply. “Get your head back on. You start getting distracted, and you’re practically handing him the belt. Focus.”
Chan hangs his head again, and then he nods understandingly, extending a hand to hoist himself back up.
“Two rounds,” Mr. Seo repeats. “Two more rounds, and you can take home the title. Knock him out.”
Chan nods again, as staff members tighten the velcro around his wrists once more, and then the timer reduces by the seconds, as he prepares to meet Kang-Dae in the center ring again.
When the boxing bell chimes twice for round eleven, Lin turns to you, arms folded at the elbows as she leans in to speak loudly above the chatter.
“Hey,” she says, and your head turns to meet her gaze.
She watches the match for a moment, admiring the sight of Chan dodging a hard jab, and then she resumes speaking.
“I know this series didn’t necessarily follow the footing you were expecting.”
You remain quiet, wanting for Lin to conclude her speech before producing any sort of response.
“But I wanted to say thank you. As of…” she glances at a wristwatch briefly, and then back to you, folding her arms again. “Fifteen minutes ago, we’re officially the most tuned-into channel for this fight. All because of your series.”
Your eyes widen when you meet her gaze properly, mouth parting in disbelief at her words.
“Are you serious?”
“I’m dead serious. Numbers are in, too- he averaged 15.2 thousand fans per broadcast. That’s more than twice of what we pulled in the last series.”
A breathy chuckle escapes your lips at the fact- it’s no secret this series was predicted to be huge for the channel, but you were hardly expecting to outdo your last by more than double the viewership.
Both your gazes fall to the ring, distracted momentarily at the sight of Chan delivering another hard jab to Kang-Dae’s side.
“I wanted to propose an offer,” Lin continues.
Your heartbeat quickens when she begins to speak the next part- perhaps she’ll convey to you that she knows broadcasting the moments which weren’t meant to be aired was wrong- and subsequently, it’ll be an offer to pull it from the channel entirely. Maybe she’ll acknowledge that you haven’t cared for this genre of series in a long while now, and suggest a transition to another topic.
“… for you to direct the next few parts, this time about his post-win life.”
You pause from viewing the match when she speaks, turning slowly to face her again, your expression visibly dropping at the proposal.
“Next… few parts?”
“That’s right. Seeing as he’s definitely going to win this thing, it’ll be huge. I’m thinking we can pivot to some… sports reality show, about Bang Chan only.”
She wears an amused smile on her face, nudging you with her elbow, as your gaze remains fixed on the match.
Below you, you watch Chan skillfully dodge a series of hooks, stumbling back on his feet.
And then in one swift movement, Kang-Dae delivers a strong uppercut to Chan’s left side, striking him hard in his jaw. You can hardly make out Chan’s demeanor when his whole body contorts to the left, his mitts coming up in an attempt to hold his jaw. But you can make out the unsightly image of blood and saliva trickling down the side of his mouth, and the way his eyes squeeze shut in a pained manner.
When the bell chimes five times to call for an end to round eleven, you shuffle quickly past Lin to the stairs, beginning your way down to where Chan’s team prepares a bucket and a towel. You don’t have any sort of plan devised, knowing very well that you’re prohibited from congregating in the midst of a match, but you make your descent anyway, overtaken with sheer panic at the sight of his weak silhouette.
“Hold that thought!” You call out to her, assisting yourself down the banister with the swift brush of your hand.
“What- where on earth are you going?” She calls, being met with no response, as she watches you near the blue corner of the ring.
*
“Is he okay?” You call out to Mr. Seo, quickly shuffling past Chan’s team to where he’s hoisted over the stool. His body lies limply back on the surface, chest rising and falling with short, sharp breaths as they dab blood from the corners of his mouth with a white towel.
Several members grant you entry to make your way closer to him, until you’re standing just behind his slouched figure, your hands coming up to grasp the ropes as you raise your voice.
“Chan!” You call, and he seems to straighten his posture, finally pivoting around to meet your gaze. His lips pull into a hazy smile, exposing his blue mouth guard, which drips with thick, stringy saliva, mixed with the harsh contrast of bright crimson blood. A single hand comes around to pull it out of him, instructing him to spit into a bucket. It’s Mr. Seo’s hand, you quickly realize, as Chan complies and swishes a mouthful of water over his wounds.
His brow appears bruised, a gaping cut being cleaned by several pairs of hands, and his shoulders look weak, you notice, as they work to loosen them up in massaging motions.
There’s no time to position him back into place, so Mr. Seo simply lets the conversation unfold between you two, dabbing at Chan’s bloodied wounds and understanding that leading you away is only going to distract him even more.
“I still haven’t been fully honest with you,” Chan begins to say to you, between labored breaths. Blood continues to dribble out from out between his lips, wiped away as fast as possible while the timer counts down until his return to the match.
“What?” You question, confused at the direction of his speech. You shake your head, aware he may simply be concussed, as your eyebrows arch in concern. “Chan, are you okay?”
“About what scares me,” Chan continues. He chuckles as he speaks, sounding almost crazy, as the etches of his gums are outlined again by deep crimson, dribbling onto his chapped lips.
“Losing scares the shit out of me,” Chan says to you. “But not just losing a match,” he clarifies.
Your eyebrows furrow as you watch a hand come around to dab at the gash on his brow again, the fresh white towel turning a dark shade of red as his blood soaks right through it.
“I never told you that I loved you,” Chan finishes.
You halt speaking, and perhaps also breathing, as his lips pull into a satisfied smile. “And that losing you is what scares me the most now.”
His team members glance at you curiously as they work to get him cleaned up, some of them just having seen you for the first time. A few of them know you to be the “filmmaker”, a little perplexed at his admission of romance to you. But before you can respond, Mr. Seo is shoving a guard back into his mouth and gesturing to the ring.
“Let’s go,” Mr. Seo commands. “Last round and we can bring this thing home. Let’s finish this at round twelve.”
Although Chan remains weak, he rises from the stool, kicking it aside and rolling back his shoulders. His gaze doesn’t leave yours for a moment, shooting you a saccharine smile, before pivoting back toward the ring and tapping his mitts together.
“Let’s finish this at round twelve,” he repeats, eyeing Kang-Dae’s figure from across the room.
And you say nothing- somewhere between dazed and also in love, as you begin back toward your seat.
The boxing bell rings just twice to indicate the start to round twelve- or otherwise the start of what could be the very last round in this match.
“And so we begin round twelve of this historic confrontation, between undefeated champ Bang Chan and his opponent Kang-Dae,” an announcer echoes loudly over the arena. Chan coming in again with strong jabs, appeared to be fully re energized as he corners Kang-Dae in the ring again.”
Your view of him is much more intimate than it was prior to being stood here on the outskirts of the ring. You can now observe every minuscule bead of sweat that flies off either member when the other produces a hit, and the thumping echos of their jabs are much louder at this proximity.
“This is certainly an adjustment by Kang-Dae,” the announcer states. “He seems to be quicker on his footwork. Chan seems like he’s resuming with heavy punches like before, but he’s still stumbling a little bit.”
Your heart races at their words, taking note of the way he visibly falters when Kang-Dae delivers a punch to his chest.
At the sight of Chan pivoting to dodge an uppercut, you glance around at the spectators, observing the sea of people whose eyes all remain set on his stumbling figure. They gasp when he gets hit once more, and they seem to laugh when he regains his balance, his arms darting out to strike Kang-Dae’s torso.
They flaunt colorful face paint, parade signs with images of his smiling face and shout for him to “fight, win!” as though their discoordinate voices may somehow be the defining factor of tonight’s outcome. And upon closer inspection, they even twirl sherbet popsicles around in their grasp, devouring them with such desperation, as though they could ever begin to comprehend the sacredness of Bang Chan’s favorite dessert- something entirely out of his reach now, unattainable. Much like a life not tainted by the pressure to win is.
It’s only then that you realize the deep sense of discomfort the sight instills within you- it’s entirely unnerving to be entertained by his fear- and even his pain, like this. To consume the sacred intricacies of his life, to know him at such proximity and put him on a pedestal like some higher power. Only to rob him of all things sacred, televise his secrets and serve as a stepping-stone into a life he never wanted for himself. Whether it be the relativity of a spectator to his public image, or of a lover to his vulnerability, it feels wrong. You can make sense of why Chan hadn’t wanted to do this for a good amount of his life now- it feels entirely too voyeuristic.
“… The current unofficial score reads 10-9, still in favor of Bang Chan,” the announcer reads. “Who’s keen on uppercuts- but Kang-Dae certainly isn't far behind with his jabs.”
Chan dodges another harsh jab, producing a strong hit to Kang-Dae, who appears breathless as he regains his composure.
“Folks, this could be the night Bang Chan maintains his unbroken winning streak, putting him ahead of all boxers in the Golden Gloves Championships for the last 20 years.”
The audience erupts in another wave of cheers when Chan hits Kang-Dae again, and again, producing repeated, robust punches to his torso.
You shift your weight onto your toes to catch a better glimpse of him, admiring the way he clenches his jaw angrily, fists spread to shield his face.
And at just 30 seconds to the conclusion of round twelve, Kang-Dae strikes again, lunging forward to deliver a harsh uppercut to Chan’s lower right jaw.
At first he stumbles backward a little bit- and then he seems to loose his balance entirely, collapsing onto the ground beneath him, his mitts outspread to soften the landing.
Although the arena is louder than ever before, it seems to grow almost silent as you hold your breath.
You approach the ring a little closer, your eyes scanning over Chan’s lying figure, his eyes blinking in a dizzied state as the recess lights illuminate his glistening torso.
He’s bloodied, in several more areas now, a generous stream of crimson growing in a patch on the side of his right eye.
You call for him once, and a second time, and then a third time- to no avail.
Perhaps your screams only escape from between your lips as whispers, if at all- that, you can’t tell, as the sound of your own heartbeat drowns out the physical noise of the arena.
A comforting hand is felt on your back, quickly realized to be Lin, from out of your peripheral vision, who watches equally as paralyzed.
The referee makes his way to Bang Chan, beginning to count down aloud, as the audience scream from all sides of the room at him.
“Get up!” They say, making erratic motions with the wave of their hands.
“You can still win!” Another is heard shouting, their voice in a clear state of panic.
“10, 9, 8…”
And as Chan lies, his back parallel to the floor of the ring, he remembers the feeling of this beside you, your languid figures silently relishing in the presence of one another.
Even with eyes shut tightly, Chan swears he can still see pairs of eyes observing him carefully, analyzing his every move and holding him to the standards of a consistent winner. Angle your fist upward. Quicker on the footwork. Harder. Faster.
Atta boy. Be a man. Be a winner.
It’s only when his coach has gone home for the evening, when the other athletes file out of the training gym one by one, towels slung over their broad shoulders and duffel bags packed with spare gloves and changes of clothes. It’s when he’s the last shower of the night, letting scorching water roll off his toned body, steam fogging the mirrors until his own reflection is indistinguishable to him once more. And it’s when he’s concluded throwing practice punches in the now-empty ring, his muscular back parallel to the floor of the ring just like this, and his eyes fixed on the gray industrial ceilings and recess lights. It’s only then that he isn’t so easily defined by a winning streak.
In fact, his wins mean nothing in the absence of other athletes, who are also defined by the numerical realities of trophies gained and matches lost. The world feels much clearer to him like this, no longer clouded by the gym chatter and bruised knuckles that seek permanent shelter in his conscience. He’s just Bang Chan- not a winner, not even a boxer. Just Chan.
And though he allows it to consume him entirely, often replacing his curiosity for the world around him and a lingering loneliness with the insatiable appetite to fight, win, conquer- he knows deep down that it’s still not all of him. There remains a sort of fragility tucked somewhere beyond all this rigidness- there’s still a heavy humanness underneath these conjectures that he’s the ‘perfect boxer’.
What is a winning streak relative to an empty boxing ring? What is a spectator relative to a participant? What are concealed identities relative to a lifetime of falsifying new ones?
“6, 5 …” the referee continues.
From well beyond his position, he can hear something about the historic event of watching a boxer lose his winning streak for the first time in his career, amidst the crescendoing sounds of simultaneous cheering and booing alike.
Kang-Dae jogs in place, tapping his own mitts together as he awaits Chan’s next move, mentally pushing for the second hand on the timer to move faster than 2mm per second.
“4…”
Yet Chan remains there, parallel to the floor of the ring he was practically raised in, letting a gush of crimson now conceal his sight, as his head cocks to one side in defeat.
“3, 2, 1.”
The word “loser” is uttered somewhere in the announcement of his loss, as Kang-Dae’s fist is raised victoriously in the air by the referee, preceding the loud blow of a whistle and another uproar of cheers.
And although the word rings throughout his ears like he’d always feared it would, it doesn’t sound nearly as scary as he imagined it might.
In fact, you’d have thought he won the match, by the way his lips pull into a satisfied smile, as the weight of a lifetime is lifted off his shoulders at last.
*
EPILOGUE
Calloused hands adjust the lavalier microphone a little higher up onto the collar of Chan’s button-down shirt, his fingers easing through the process, as he’s already done this a dozen times now.
He raises his index finger up to his right brow, running it along the row of butterfly bandages still adhered to the gaping wound he boasts, and your hand darts out instinctively to stop him, lowering his wrist back onto his lap.
“I said don’t touch it,” you instruct him.
He seems to wear an amused smile for the millionth time today, as though maybe he’s doing it on purpose to elicit a reaction from you.
Chan observes as you scribble something onto a stack of papers, your head lowered in concentration to review a long list of questions.
And then you meet his gaze finally, mirroring his smile with one of your own, as you gesture to the camera.
“I’m going to ask you a few questions,” you say to him. “Just answer as honestly as you can.”
“Are we rolling?” Chan asks, and he’s swiftly met with a nod of your head.
“Yeah,” you say to him. “We’re rolling.”
His hands fold in his lap, the jingle of his silver bracelet making itself known as he fiddles nervously, and then you start with the first question.
“Chan,” you begin. “You recently lost your first boxing match ever.”
He nods, not appearing disappointed, but rather contented, as he crosses his legs at the ankles.
“Can you tell us how you’re feeling?”
His eyes scan the ceiling momentarily, chuckling softly, before he speaks again.
“Nobody wants to lose,” Chan admits. “When I started boxing fourteen years ago, all I wanted to do was win. And I won consistently- at some point, losing ceased to even feel like a possibility. I hadn’t considered it very seriously.”
You nod as he speaks, and then Chan swallows nervously, before continuing.
“And then I began to think about losing,” he says. “And I couldn’t stop. The thoughts consumed me, to constantly imagine putting myself in the shoes of somebody who had to walk away from something so… unvictoriously.”
He sighs, and then he shrugs his shoulders just once.
“And now I’m a loser,” he finishes. “And I realize that there’s a lot more to boxing than just winning or losing. In fact, there’s more to the word than simply being a person who didn’t come out of it unvictorious.”
“What do you mean by that?” You say to him.
“Well,” he begins. “Prior to this event, I was fully set on forfeiting the whole thing. It’s something I had wanted to do for a long time- something I felt was right, in the midst of my aversion to this… vulnerable version of myself, that I kept tucked away from the public for my whole life.”
His expression grows serious now, brows furrowed as best as he can manipulate them, in deep concentration.
“And I realized that walking away from something you’ve always wanted, in response to a fear of your vulnerability- that’s unvictorious. I was scared for people to see me as any less than a strong, consistent winner. But that’s not realistic.”
You nod as Chan speaks, shooting him a proud smile- he’s allowing himself to be vulnerable on camera for the first time since you’ve met him. And though his voice shakes a little as he speaks, he conveys his truths so elegantly, the same way he did when you first interviewed him. He upholds this new image of him with such dexterity, careful not to accidentally portray a version of himself which might somehow contradict all that he’s learned. Yet it’s easier than he assumed it would be, he quickly realizes, when he finishes with a small nod of his head.
“I might be a loser in the sense of a boxing match,” he explains. “But relative to everything else I’ve gained along the way, I feel pretty victorious.”
You glance down at your papers, brushing your fingers over the next set of printed questions, and then you disregard them entirely when you meet his gaze again, producing your own now.
“You’re stepping down from being a boxer for the first time in your life,” you say to him. “Are you scared?”
Chan thinks it over momentarily, and then he shakes his head.
“I used to get punched by people for a living. There used to be so little that actually scared me.”
Your lips pull into a smile, recalling this conversation from long before his championship match.
“That being said-” he continues. “I’m terrified. But I guess that’s just a part of being honest with yourself. I’m just going to do it afraid.”
A soft chuckle escapes your lips, your eyes not leaving his as he observes the way you smile back at him. He’s just as charming as the day you met him- but he’s also real, and fascinating from this distance, made more perfect by extension of all his very human traits. His fears, reservations, embarrassments, frustrations- they’re all a part of who he is- not some “perfect boxer”, or a “born winner”, but simply Bang Chan- an imperfect boxer with one hell of a story to tell.
“Chan- what’s next for you?” You ask Chan, cocking your head slightly as you speak.
A breathy chuckle escapes his lips, his eyebrows raised curiously as he ponders the question.
“I’ll return to boxing someday,” he confesses. “It’s been an honorable 14 years here. I’m just going to find what else makes me tick. Maybe… pick up a thing or two about journalism?”
You laugh lightly when he does, shaking your head in response.
Of course he jests on the topic of journalism, knowing very well that you too, are set to take a break from this line of work following the air of the final interview.
With Chan losing the fight, Lin had begged you to rope him into another series, knowing that the general public had not faulted Chan for his broken winning streak. In fact, they had taken a larger liking to him than ever before, publishing raving reviews about his persistence to compete, despite his fears. And though you’d been offered a hefty pay to film another voyeuristic series into some new athlete’s life- a fencer, so you’ve heard, the offer was politely declined, as you opt to follow Chan on to the next chapter.
“Only if you teach me a thing or two about boxing,” you say to him, and he holds out a hand to shake on it.
“Deal.”
“That’s a wrap,” you tell Chan, as you press the shutter release one last time, detaching your camera from its tripod and stowing it away into its leather casing.
“Last time, huh?” A voice says from behind you.
You pivot on your heel to meet the gaze of Mr. Seo, who shoots you a kind smile as he makes his entrance, giving Chan a friendly pat on the back.
“Hey!” Chan exclaims, turning around to deliver a warm hug to him, instead.
“I was just leaving for the evening,” Mr. Seo tells you both, his hands on his hips. He then raises his eyebrows knowingly, glancing around at the gym, before gesturing to the wall with a cock of his head.
“Come on,” he says. “I wanna show you one last thing.”
You both exchange confused looks, and then oblige to follow him down the hallway into the ring, where he halts just in front of the gallery wall.
You crane your necks up to the portraits- all the familiar faces remain in their respective positions, except for the addition of one new photograph, concealed by a white sheet.
Before Chan can inquire about the recent addition, Mr. Seo pulls it off ceremoniously, letting the white fabric drape onto the floor of the gym to unveil a brand new photo.
This one’s in color, for the first time, the stark contrast of the bright blue mitts against his tanned skin drawing the attention of all your eyes. It’s a still shot of Bang Chan, his fists extended into a mean uppercut, eyebrows narrowed into a stern expression as he strikes at his opponent. You recognize it to be from the night of Chan’s title fight, and although he hadn’t taken home the title that evening, the photograph is no indication of any form of loss. In fact, he’s entirely indistinguishable from the rest of the winners housed on the wall- including Baik Hyun-Man, who now lives just to the left of him.
“You’re kidding,” Chan exclaims through tearful laughter. Mr. Seo just smiles, shrugging casually in response.
“All the greats are meant to live here,” he tells Chan. “Especially the winners.”
Before Mr. Seo makes his departure, the same black duffel bag hoisted over his shoulder, he stops in his tracks, turning to Chan with a sense of urgency in his voice.
“I almost forgot,” Mr. Seo exclaims. “Popsicles!”
“What?” Chan questions with a small chuckle.
“I found them finally, in the convenience store on the south side! I left them on the table for you toward the gallery wall, though. You’d better eat them before they melt.”
And then he’s off at last, the setting sun outlining his departing figure beyond the glass gym doors.
Chan does as he’s told, retrieving what are indeed his favorite sherbet popsicles from the table by the gallery wall, and providing you with one this time.
“You’re gonna love these,” he says to you, undoing the wrapper of both your popsicles and discarding them both on the gym floor.
“You’re making a mess!” You exclaim, as Chan shoves one into your grasp, instructing you to devour it entirely.
You bring the bright orange dessert up to your lips, taking a small lick, and Chan eagerly awaits your reaction.
“Well?” He questions, beginning on his own in the process.
“That’s phenomenal,” you say to him with a chuckle, taking another lick, and then another, and several more, the dessert quickly melting in your grasp and finding purchase along your forearms.
Chan laughs, too, bringing his lips down to your arm to trace his tongue along the trail of sticky sherbet and leaving a trail of tender kisses as he cleans you up. And then he kisses you just once when he’s finished, a sweet mixture of sherbet present on both your tongues as you bite back a smile.
When he pulls away to resume working on his popsicle, he cranes his neck up at the gallery wall once more, cocking his head to examine the rows of portraits.
“What are you thinking about?” He asks, the way he always does, and you chuckle lightly in response.
“No need to interview the interviewer,” you say instinctively. And then you hum softly as you crane your neck, too, remembering you’re no longer an interviewer relative to Bang Chan, but rather comfortably in love with him, as you move onto the next chapter alongside each other.
“I’m thinking about all these boxers,” you opt to say instead. “Like, where do you think Hyun-Man is now?”
Chan hums in response, shrugging at your question. It’s a strange thought when he remembers how future spectators will be pondering his whereabouts someday, as they hold their respective gazes on this very wall.
“I don’t think he’d want us to know,” Chan confesses. “I think he purposely left us only with tales of guts and glory to remember him by.”
He tilts his head the other direction now, working his tongue along the base of his popsicle, before speaking again.
“Through tales of mine, of guts and glory,” Chan voices deeply, mimicking the renowned boxer’s famous last speech. And then his words are pacified by his popsicle, as he relishes in the flavor of something finally sacred to him once more.
But neither of you need to utter another word to conclude his sentence, mentally finishing it on your own.
“… we find our footing in the knowledge that we tried.”
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cherryobx · 4 months ago
Text
Today
a/n: part 2 of this fic, can be read on its own!
pairing: Rafe Cameron x reader
summary: the morning after getting drunk and trying to kiss your best friend the previous night
warnings: language, one sexual innuendo i think, mentions of getting drunk, being hangover and nausea (but no detailed descriptions)
wc: 1.5k
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The sun shines directly into your eyes through the windows of your bedroom and forces you awake. It’s almost painful. You get up to pull down the blinds to make the room dark and being in there bearable. 
You fall back into bed and bury your face in the numerous pillows propped up against the headboard, regretting drinking last night. The headache and nausea are bad but you’ve definitely experienced worse. You’ll live.
You reach for your phone which you usually place on the nightstand for the night, but it isn’t there. Lifting your head from the pillows you squint in confusion. There’s a water bottle, an Advil pill and a piece of paper there instead.
Sitting up, you grab the note first. Rafe’s neat handwriting fills the sticky note.
Had to go home for a sec. I’ll come by later. Make that hangover your bitch. - R
Right, he stayed the night. You smile at that and place it back down on the nightstand before popping the Advil into your mouth and downing almost the entire bottle of water in one go.
Memories from the previous night slowly start flooding in. Best friend’s birthday party. Too much alcohol. Hot tub. Phone ruined by said hot tub. Rafe taking you home. Begging Rafe to kiss you.
Oh my God. You asked your best friend to kiss you while drunk. That is so embarrassing. Even though it’s exactly what you’ve wanted for a while now. You weren’t planning on spilling your feelings to him while drunk like this. How can you look him in the eye when he comes by later knowing that you tried to pursue him romantically last night?
The hangover is now battling with your nerves and it’s not a very good combination. In an attempt to feel like a human again, you get up from bed, brush your teeth, fix your hair as much as possible and remove the makeup from last night and finally change into something other than your pyjamas.
Even those little mundane tasks are a bit difficult as your head spun and pounded simultaneously. You lay back in your bed to catch your breath but drift off instead.
Rafe keeps his word and comes over sometime in the afternoon, after a trip to the nearest technology store and buying you a new phone just like he had promised.
“Hey.” You feel a hand on your shoulder, shaking you gently to wake you up from your slumber.
“Oh, hey.” You sit up and rub the sleep from your eyes.
Rafe is sitting on the edge of your bed and it’s giving you flashbacks from last night when you two were sitting just like this. But this time the air is different. There’s something unspoken between you two.
He gives you a once over before shoving a small box into your hands. Your eyes fall to your hands in your lap and see a brand new phone in them. It’s the newer model of your previous one and you know for a fact it’s expensive.
“You didn’t.” Disbelief and shock are evident in your tone of voice. 
“I told you I would.” He seems almost proud of himself.
You scoff. “Asshole. I can’t accept this. Take it back.” You attempt to give it back to him but he pulls his hands away and holds them in the air, refusing to take it.
“No. It’s yours.”
“I don’t want it,” you rebut but it’s no use. He refuses to take it back.
“You need it.”
“I could’ve bought one with my own money. I don’t want you spending so much on me. It’s insane, Rafe.”
“I don’t mind spending a little on you once in a while.” He shrugs like it’s nothing. Like this huge amount of money means nothing to him.
“A little? For fuck’s sake, Rafe, this is a thousand dollar phone! That is way too much.” Your voice is high pitched and desperate. You really can’t accept this. It’s too much. You feel bad for him spending such a sum on you.
“Is it? Don’t really care.”
“Oh my fucking God, you’re impossible!” 
He chuckles. “You love me.”
“I’m about to whoop your fucking ass.”
“Kinky.” He smirks and lays down on his side, body propped up by his forearm and elbow.
You stare at the phone between your hands and then him. You know he won’t budge. Once Rafe has set his mind to something it’s impossible to change it. You also know he won’t take the phone back out of spite. If you don’t want something it’’s exactly what he’ll give you.
“Thank you,” you say, finally giving up. It’s impossible to convince him to take it back.
“You’re welcome, sweetheart.”
Sweetheart. Your heart tightens at the nickname he uses. It’s not abnormal for him to use nicknames like this for you, but today it feels immensely different.
“Have you eaten anything today?” he asks with a slightly worried tone.
You shake your head. “No. I’ve been too nauseous all morning.”
At that he pulls his phone out of the pocket of his shorts, taps a few buttons and then hands it to you. “Order something then.”
You look at him dumbfounded. “What?”
“Food, sweetheart. Order something. You need to eat,” he insists.
Your first thought is that it’s such a sweet gesture which shows your best friend really cares about you. The second one is that he’s about to spend even more money on you. And that you don’t like.
“Rafe.” 
He knows what this is about but refuses to let you argue in any way. “Shut up and get what you want.” 
You zip your lips and scroll on the app on his phone, looking through the options the restaurants offer and choosing what looks and feels the most appetising at the moment. You decide on just fries and chicken nuggets. Your usual hangover food pick. They somehow taste even better than they normally do when you’re battling a killer headache.
“Classic,” he chuckles as you hand him his phone back and he takes a look at what you chose.
He picks something for himself too and then presses the order button and pays for both of your food.
As you wait for the food to arrive, he offers to help you set up your new, extremely expensive, phone. He scoots next to you on the bed, both of you now sitting beside each other, backs against the headboard and your sides together, touching each other. Your skin tingles where it touches his and the feeling is almost addictive.
He taps away on the screen, focused on getting all your data over to this new phone but you just look at him, taking him in. He’s so into the task in front of him that he doesn’t even notice your soft eyes on him. How you look at him with adoration in your eyes and a tightness in your chest.
The familiar urge to kiss him from last night resurfaces. Didn’t he mention he wanted this too? You’re not sure. What if you remember incorrectly? What if your memory is lying to you or making his promises from last night up?
But the need is so strong and your mind is just telling you to go for it. Is this a bad idea? Too late.
Your hand reaches out before you stop yourself, before you can think twice about your actions. You must be still drunk from last night because where is this sudden courage coming from?
You place your hand on his chin and gently turn his head to face you. His face is full of curiosity and confusion.
“I’m sorry,” you say, apologising in advance for your actions because you don’t know what the aftermath of this will be. Leaning in, you place your lips on his which takes Rafe by surprise.
He’s taken aback for a second and pulls away to look at you. He’s searching your eyes for any hesitation or regret. When he doesn’t find a shred of them there, he drops your new phone from his hands, disregarding it somewhere in the sheets and grabbing your face with both of his hands and reuniting your lips once again, kissing you desperately. Like he needs it to breathe. Like he’s hungry and has been starving for months.
It’s feverish. You’re both satisfying a craving you’ve been trying to ignore for so long and all of those feelings are unleashed into that kiss. 
“Don’t ever fucking apologize for that again,” he says when you break apart to catch your breath. His forehead is resting against yours and it’s so intimate on so many levels you feel lightheaded.
You open your mouth, wholeheartedly intending to apologise again but he stops you in your tracks. A ‘shut up’ leaves his mouth before it’s on yours again, shutting you up very effectively. 
“Ass,” you mumble in between kisses.
“You kiss me with that mouth?” He fakes shock at your words.
“Shut up.” You roll your eyes and use his tactic to shut him up instead.
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screeching-bunny · 11 months ago
Note
Need more of our yan slasher,he's so pookie,i wanna bite his cheeks (in a affectionate way) and cuddle with him until the end of times,he's such a cutie 😭💗
Yandere! Slasher Pt.2
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Warnings: Obsessive Behavior, Yandere Thoughts, Bad Writing, Stalking, Possessive Behavior, Reader is Referred as ‘You’
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Pt. 1
After reading the message sent by Yandere! Slasher, everyone subconsciously looked at you. Never in your life did you want to go home more badly than you did right now. Why did you even decide to go to a party in the first place? You don’t even like people in general! You were definitely never going out to socialize with others after this. If only there were more booze around here you really didn’t want to handle this situation semi sober.
You: “... What are you all looking at me for, they gave out a very vague description of someone. This could literally be anyone in this room with similar features to me.”
The next minute the phone screen immediately lights up with a message.
Yandere! Slasher: “I’m talking about you.”
You: “...”
After a few more seconds of silence, you finally managed to suppress the fear and uneasiness in your heart. You took the phone from the person beside you and carefully looked back at the messages that were sent by Yandere! Slasher. Finally looking down at the text box you begin to slowly type a message.
You: “Sorry, I don’t like guys with dark hair.”
Yandere! Slasher: “I can always dye it.”
You: “I don’t like your face.”
Yandere! Slasher: “There’s always plastic surgery”
You: “How do I know that you're rich? What if you’re lying and actually not broke.”
Yandere! Slasher: “I’ll buy you whatever you want right now. I can even send you my credit card information if you decide to be with me.
Damn you were broke but not broke enough to allow yourself to be with some killer. If it weren’t for your morals you would have probably folded by now.
Yandere! Slasher: “Well it’s not like you have a choice anyways. I plan on making you my spouse either way. You can either come with me willingly or I could take you by force…. Well looks like you’re taking too long. I'll decide for you.”
With that text message sent, you immediately began to feel queasy. You were struggling to keep your eyes wide open and your body was beginning to become very sluggish. Slowly but surely your senses were starting to stop and the last thing that you were able to hear were the sound of your peers screaming for help. With one last attempt to get out of your situation, you try to slowly crawl away. Only for your attempts to be interrupted when someone gently picks you up. “You’re not going anywhere cutie.” and with that you were now fully unconscious.
The next morning you woke up with the world’s worst hangover in the world. Never in your life did you feel this fucked up and and groggy all at once. You begin to raise up your body but soon realize that your body was tightly restricted by some rope and you were wrapped in the arms of some guy. The immediate thought in your head was that this was, last night was either the kinkiest night of your life or some random weirdo had ended up kidnapping you. Due to your movements the man next to you begins to wake up and looks over to you with a smile on his face.
“Cutie! I’m so glad you’re awake. We have so many things that we need to discuss right now! I’ve been thinking about the names of our future kids. Do you have any preferences? I don’t really mind what we name them but I want a lot of kids! Wait! I’m being so inconsiderate right now. I never even asked you if you wanted kids. If you don’t like them we can adopt as many pets as we physically can and we–”
As he was rambling it finally hit you. He was the fucking weirdo from the night before. You wanted to fucking die. Never in a million years did you think that you’d have to deal with a serial killer and an extrovert at that. Maybe if you pretended to be deaf he would stop talking to you. You begin to look at him and begin to make gestures with your head and facial expressions to signify that you were deaf. Yandere! Slasher looks at you for a few minutes before laughing.
“Sweetie, that's not going to work. I’ve been stalking you for the last couple of years. I know that you’re not deaf. Besides I’ve looked at your medical, you're perfectly healthy right now. Which reminds me, my precious little darling must be starving right now. It’s my job as your future husband to take care of you. Now wait right here for me.”
With that he leaves you entrapped alone in the room. Although your eyes were still a little blurry you were still able to make out the contents of the room. Scanning the room, your eyes fell upon a glint of metal under a desk —a discarded tool left by neglect or chance. Adrenaline surged as you inched closer, your heart racing in synchrony with your movements. With trembling fingers, you grasped the tool, the cold touch sending a shiver down your spine.
Summoning every ounce of determination, you started sawing at the ropes, each movement a blend of agony and hope. The metallic smell of blood filled your nose as the sharp edges of the tool cut into your skin. With each passing second, the knots loosened, freedom within tantalizing reach. With one last rough movement you were able to be free of your binds. As you made your way towards the window. A creak soon shatters the silence and the door swings open. Revealing your kidnapper's looming silhouette.
“Look at you all covered in blood because I left the room. Did you really think I would leave the room without any monitors watching you? I was hoping that you wouldn't try to escape but I guess I’ll have to be training you from now on cutie. Guess I’ll have to punish you right now. Do me a favor and lay down won’t you?”
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changisworld · 5 months ago
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A helping hand
Felix x f!reader
Word count:6,227
Summary: Felix is addicted to masterbating & also sex. But despite his addictions, he hasn’t got laid in over a year & has to use his hand but he has now gotten bored with it. He has tried different toys, DIY tricks etc but it’s just not the same, so he caves in one night & signs up to one of the “single ladies in your area” adverts out of complete desperation after clicking on it by accident. not thinking in case he gets a million more porn viruses, but he ends up talking to someone he thinks is even more attractive than him, you.
->Authors note at bottom!
18+ MDNI, SMUT WARNINGS BELOW THE CUT.
©ANY translation, copy & paste, posting of my work is strictly forbidden for ANY posts/ writing i post.
main masterlist here
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SMUT WARNINGS: NEEEEDDDDYYY felix, felix cums a LOT& i mean a LOT, multiple orgasms(both rec), switch reader, switch felix, spit, oral (both rec), 69, facesitting, ball sucking, slliiiiggghhhtttt anal play(felix rec), body worship, squirting, hair pulling, very brief masterbating, slight overstimulation, cum eating, creampie, tiniest bit of dirty talk, praise, finger sucking, aftercare is mostly off screen! 90% smut 10% plot (sorry nawt sorry)
Felix has been scrolling through pornhub & also twitter for hours. He has gotten two hundred pages down into pornhub & can't help but grumble to himself, his cock red & angry now resting on his lower stomach, a few, small ropes of cum spread across his abs & for him, that's nothing.
He scratches the underside of his cock with his nails in a slow motion, trying to give himself a tiny bit of stimulation.
He keeps aimlessly scrolling through the pages upon pages of videos but he is barely even reading the titles, his eyes getting bored & he ends up focusing on the bunch of stupid adverts at the top of the page & he watches the same clip replaying over & over & he clicks on the video right below the advert a second later, the thumbnail catching his attention for the first time in forever.
The video takes a second to load & another advert comes up & he sighs, before realising it's the same advert from the top of the screen. He goes to press the 'skip advert' button but accidently clicks on the actual advert & it takes him onto a website.
He goes to just click off of it, but something... someone catches his his eye.
The website is styled like an early 2000's porn magazine, pictures of women with descriptions below, a small text box beneath each where you can leave your own message for the women to get back to you.
He decides to just scroll down a few, when a specific girl stands out to him, a girl called y/n. In the picture given, you're wearing a lacey black bra & panties set, your body & face on full display.
He takes a brief look at your description: "*YOUR AGE*, no hard no's, feel free to message me, I won't bite unless you ask me to<3" & Felix feels almost compelled to text you. He signs up to the website, not even bothering to think if it's a scam website & could steal all his information before setting his profile picture, his name, age & bio up before sending you a message.
Felix's description: "Into absolutely everything. I dom & sub, I'm not picky!:3 You name it, I'm into it!" He decides to keep it short, not wanting to add too much in case with his luck, one of his friends, almost as desperate as he is, coming across his account somehow.
Felllx2000: Aren't u too pretty to be here?
Felix texts you, not wanting to sound like a weirdo, he goes to click out of your name & scroll further down the site when he sees a speech bubble at the bottom of the screen, you already typing back.
You: Shouldn't I be asking you the same? you look so innocent, what you doing on here? Felllx2000: looks are deceiving then lol, i'm anything but that:3 You: I seen your bio, you seem like fun, whats brought you here? Felllx2000: came here on accident lol but i dont regret it now, do u have any more pics of u?? You: aww you're just a cutie<3 ofc I do, I'm supposed to make you pay for images since only the texting part is meant to be free but you're just a beautiful boy so one wont hurt. You:Imag.ddxi41g
Felix's eyes widen at the image, you're posing in the mirror in another set of lingerie, this time a hot pink set, making your curves look as good as possible, your hand cupping the bottom of one of your tits & you are sticking your tongue out.
Felix's cock jumps up from his stomach for the first time all night & a few of his fingers reach down to fondle the tip of his dick, eyes narrowing slightly at the sensation.
Felllx2000:can i be a beg & ask for another? ur so hot it hurts You: You're really a desperate boy aren't you? Why not you send me something of you first n i can decide if i'll send anything else ;)
Felix reads this & is instantly flicking onto his camera roll & selecting multiple photos of himself, photos of his aching leaky cock, photos of his abs & even a full body shot before sending it.
You, on the other side of the phone, your jaw drops when he sends the photos & the sleep clothes you're wearing all of a sudden feeling far too tight on your body. You go back into your camera roll & dig out a pussy picture, your fingers in a 'V' shape, spreading your hole & your clit visible, a shimmer noticeable, the photo taken after you did a private show for another texter (you made over £950 that night) since you were a bit too sleepy to take a brand new picture since it's 2am for you both.
Felix's cock pulsates, this being the first time he's actually received nudes for the first time in months & he begins to actually jerk off into his hand, all of a sudden he is actually getting the tiniest bit of sensation to his cock as he admires the photo.
Felllx2000: y/n ur making me nuts holy shit You: Feelings mutual sweetie, u jerking off for me? Felllx2000: thats a silly question of course i am, wish it was you though</3 You: you gonna cum just from a few pictures hmm? why you so needy? do you not get female attention, pretty? Can I ask what your body count is gorgeous? with a face like that you can easily be married by now. Felllx2000: noooo;( my hand doesn't bring me anything good, want someone else, want u. It's 3, I just dont get the chance! im good in bed though, id luv to prove it! ;0 You: Your neediness turns me on so much babe, what is it you want me to do to you? I want to kiss your pretty face off n ride you till you cry, your cock is so beautiful, so pink
You can't help but smile at your screen & you shut your phone off & you crawl out your bed & hop in the shower, taking the extra time to use extra body scrubs & scents as you feel a bit nervous of what you are gonna do, in the meantime, felix has began blowing up your phone.
Felllx2000:Want u to wrap ur lips around me so much;( want to fuck u so bad, i can last so long y/n, u have no idea Felllx2000: would let u wrap ur thighs around my head, pull my hair, i can be so good for you if u want me tooooo<3 Felllx2000: where u gone?:( did i scare u? im sorry, u dont need to respond.
You hop out the shower & dry your hair as quick as you can & you lift your phone that's half hidden in your bedsheets & you see the messages he sent & your eyebrows furrow a bit.
You: Don't be so silly, nothing that comes from your pretty face could scare me. You free right now?
Felix opens that text almost instantly & his eyes instantly widen, his hand freezing on his cock as he just stares at the words.
Felllx2000: I am why? you sound nearly as desperate as me
You: Well if you're really that desperate for me, we can exchange numbers & talk more n meet up hmm? & don't get cheeky lmao, calling me desperate compared to you! silly silly but i wont deny it;)
Felllx2000: right now? it says we are 6km apart so i can pick u up? or when? idk i dont do this idk how to acttt, you're making me blush You: Sounds fine hunny, we need to switch app because if we somehow get caught n you didnt pay id get in shit lmao, we arent allowed to meet people irl but theres just something about you, gimme your number pretty please
Felix springs up in bed & sends you his number quicker than you can blink & you text his number & he replies just as quick & his heart is racing at the thought... he's maybe gonna actually hook up with someone???
⭑・゚゚・*:༅。.。༅:*゚:*:✼✿  ✿✼:*゚:༅。.。༅:*・゚゚・⭑
You both decide to text for a few days, mostly to secure your own safety in a way & you facetimed once or twice, which actually ended up in phone sex both times & you now discovered it's a huge kink of yours.
You have mostly been waiting on Felix to get more comfortable as you can tell he is the more nervous one, unsurprisingly, but tonight is the night.
You've learned a few things about Felix, one of them being when he told you his name, but he also pretty much explained to you his... addiction & you'd be lying if you said it didn't turn you on but also scare you slightly, what if you genuinely can't please him? you've never met anyone from the site in real life & you can't help but get butterflies knowing you're hooking up with felix tonight, possibly the hottest guy you've ever spoken to point blank.
Felix texts you to tell you he is on your way, both of you deciding to meet at your house since his small, man cave, standard gamerboy slightly messy apartment who he shares with his roommate Changbin is home.
You light a candle in your lounge area & put a loose top & sleep shorts on top of your chosen set & you put on the tiniest bit of makeup, still wanting to look good for him despite it being close to 1am.
⭑・゚゚・*:༅。.。༅:*゚:*:✼✿  ✿✼:*゚:༅。.。༅:*・゚゚・⭑
You hear a few knocks on your door twenty minutes later & you feel your heart coming out your throat but you do your best to swallow it as you waltz your way to the front door, putting on a brave face, taking a deep breath before opening it.
Felix & you both look at each other & smile, Felix wearing a pair of grey sweatpants & a matching hoodie, his blonde hair slightly messy. You whisper a 'hi' to one another, being quiet to not let the words echo in the apartment stairway, before you move aside for him to enter.
You shut the door behind him & you instantly flip around to look at one another again.
"Surprised you actually showed up, do you want a drink or anything?" you ask, giving him a smirk as you close the distance between you both & tease him by taking his hand in yours & guiding him to the living room, plopping him down on the couch, but he pulls you down with him.
"I'll drink later, c'mere." he remarks as he helps you onto his lap so you're straddling him & his lips lock with yours instantly, the kiss full of need from the both of you, you realising you've been lacking physical touch a fraction of the amount Felix has been.
His hands trail down to your waist & then ass, kneading it like a cat in his short fingers as he helps you begin grinding your hips against him & you can already feel his cock hard beneath the layers of clothes, making your eyebrows furrow.
You take the initiative & you begin poking your tongue through his puffy pink lips & he groans into it, the pair of you both now exchanging spit, the noise of your lips smacking together ringing through both of your ears.
You wriggle your fingers through his hair before you pull back on it, pulling his lips away from yours & he lets out a deep groan before you look at him, a mischievous look on your face before you lean down slightly & begin kissing his jawline & neck, using your teeth to nip at it, making him roll his hips onto your covered crotch, his hands fighting the urge to dig his hands past the waistband of your shorts.
You wriggle your hips slightly backwards to make more room for you to kiss his neck & your hands below his hoodie & you quickly make the note that he has no shirt beneath the hoodie he is wearing & you graze your fingers over his solid abs.
"& you said I was the desperate one, can I take these off?" he groans, his voice raspy as he tries to sound fully composed but failing. You lean back enough & raise your hips enough to wiggle off the shorts he was referring to, giggling as his eyes become glued to your covered core.
"Don't get cheeky Felix, you're the one pawing at me." you giggle as you pull his hoodie off his frame, leaving him naked on the top half & you basically naked on the bottom half.
You usher Felix to lay flat on the couch & you climb back on top of him & you plant some kisses on his now naked chest & you take one of his pretty, dark nipples in your mouth & you lightly bite, making him wince at the feeling has he keeps jerking his hips upwards, seeking even a tiny bit extra friction, which you decide you'll give him.
You give him a look as your fingers are playing with the drawstrings on his joggers & he just nods, giving you a non verbal sign that you can take them off, & you do, Felix raising his hips just enough for you to fully pull them off his milky coloured legs.
You hum in approval at the bulge in his underwear, the front part completely soaked with precum & you make quick progress of pulling his boxers off to, leaving him feeling desperate & he hums at the cold air hitting his wet tip, his cock harder & more leaky than it has been in his whole life.
"I thought nothing got you to orgasm anymore but your pretty balls look as if they're about to explode." you quip & he covers his eyes with his arm momentarily out of slight embarrassment.
"That's only when it's me, when it's you in front of me why would anyone be surprised." he squeaks, his stomach lurching forward as you take his pretty, boyfriend sized, chubby cock in your hand & hold it with a firm grip, using your thumb & index finger to pinch lightly at his piss slit, watching his cock leak precum like a broken faucet.
"What is it you're wanting Lixie, hmm?" you question, your hand painfully slowly jerking him off, more precum dripping every time your hand moves. "Tongue, please?" he pleads, his puppy eyes looking down at you & as much as you want to drag it out, your willpower already completely out the window & you chuckle at his desperate face before you ingulf his tip past your lips.
You use your hand to keep jerking off the base of his cock, his trimmed, straight pubes tickling the part of the hand that is grazing them & your other hand slithers down the extra tiny bit before you cup his balls, rolling them in your fingers & the moan the man under you lets out a load whine.
You swirl your tongue around his tip before sinking down his now completely soaked with spit cock, your drool dripping onto his balls, giving him goosebumps. You quickly come up for a breath & spit out the gallons of drool that hasn't been pushed out from his cock pistoning into your mouth & you take this opportunity to suckle on his balls, pulling on them with your lips gently, making Felix squeal as you continue rolling the other half in his hand. You catch your breath back as much as you can while doing this then you pull your lips off his balls & blow some cold air on them, making his cock twitch in your hand, before returning it into your mouth.
His hips jerk up on accident but when you moan around his cock, sending vibrations up his spine, he begins to thrust shallowly into your throat & you gurgle around him, your eyes not breaking eye contact with his, not even an ounce of embarrassment in your face despite the mess.
"Gonnagonna cum, d- you're so good." he groans as his hair begins sticking to his face as his eyes struggle & then failing to keep his eyes open as his tip spills ropes of cum out of it & landing right into your throat & you moan around his cock, moving your head up so you're only suckling on the tip as you swallow four separate mouthfuls of his orgasm & you can feel the wetness almost leaking out from your panties.
You pull fully off his dick & you aren't even that surprised that his cock is still completely hard. You open your mouth to make fun of the fact but Felix cuts you off by pulling you up towards him so you are now sat on his lower stomach & pulling your shirt off your head, leaving you in just your set & felix whines at the sight.
"Need to eat you out, I'm genuinely dying to taste you." he states as he pulls on the tiny tiny waistband of your thong & you just giggle at his words & crawl up his frame even more so your cunt is right above his face & he looks up at you with his jaw slightly open & his eyes watering.
"Really Lixie? I'll give it to you because I pity your desperation." you say, slight attitude & sarcasm in your voice as you lower yourself onto his face, your panties still covering where you both want to see & feel the most.
Felix begins to kitten lick your clit over your panties & he hums to himself at the tiniest faint taste of your juice that's seeping through your underwear & you purr at the sensation, trying your hardest to not begin grinding against his face, but when he is now pushing & pulling on your waist, you do just that.
Felix decides that your underwear is now soaked through enough with his own saliva & gets one of his small fingers & he pushes your panties to the side & he lets out a pitiful gasp.
"Your cunt is so pretty, it's soaking, shit." he murmurs, more to himself than he is to you before he digs in, pulling your body onto his face as much as he possibly can as he licks a long, wide strip up your entire cunt before settling his tongue on your puffy clit, suckling on it as if his life depends on it & you can't help but hiss at the pleasure.
He laps his tongue in tiny circles around your button as he sucks at the same time, making you feel as if you are on cloud nine. "No way this-you're this good if you're as inexperienced as-as you made out to be." You stammer, your eyes scrunched shut & your head raised up at the ceiling as your fingers find their way to his hair to tug on it, making him jerk his hips & whimper into your cunt.
He moves one of his hands from your waist & gives your ass a quick but harsh spank, making you jerk as forward as you can with his grip still holding you in place as his hand makes its way down to where his mouth is & he enters two fingers into your dripping hole & your stomach lurches & your body slightly curls forwards & you find balance in Felix's hair & he honestly has no issue with the way you are pulling on it, moaning back into your cunt which shoots right through you.
"Gonna c-cum, wait." you force out before you use all your strength to raise yourself off his completely soaked face, his lips red & puffy & his hair all dishevelled & you boop his nose, giving him a small smile through staggered breath as you do your best to flip your body around so you're now facing the rest of his body & Felix lets out a groan before pulling you back down onto his face, him already addicted to your taste & can't go s minute without it.
You grind down on his face, the bottom part of your pussy lips hitting against his nose, making you purr. You fully open your eyes & notice there's a puddle of cum on his abs, even whiter than his skin. "You c-came untouched, I'm fla-flattered." you blabber as you reach out for his cock & begin to jerk it, obviously still hard despite a second orgasm.
Felix chuckles into your cunt & his ears go a slight shade of red, a bit shy at how quickly you have managed to make him cum in such a small amount of time. You put the tip of his cock past your lips & hollow your cheeks, swirling your tongue as best as you can as your mind is going fuzzy by now.
You hum at a mixture of the taste of precum & also at the feeling Felix is providing you & you can feel your orgasm slowly bubbling up so you coat your finger in your own spit before you begin lightly pinching his balls, making him whimper into your cunt & he detaches himself from your pussy momentarily.
"Fingers, fingers y/n p-please., fingers." he squeaks to you, his voice completely blown out before he gets back to what he was doing, his brain running at a million miles an hour & his tongue moving even quicker, because despite the lack of women he has been with, he knows how to eat.
He latches his lips & tongue onto yours & suckles as he worms his tongue into your hole & your legs begin to shake & you take a second to compose yourself after listening to his words & you use the hand that was just jerking off his soaking cock & switch it to your other hand & you use your now shiny hand & you roll it down towards where he was asking, making sure to put a bit extra pressure on his balls as you drag it down.
You use your index finger & swirl it around his pucker & Felix lets out a squeal at the feeling & his dick twitches in your mouth & his hips buck up slightly making you gag but you don't pull off. As he does this, his teeth accidentally clamp down slightly on your pussy lips & that plunges you to your first orgasm of the night & your hips completely raise off his face from the overstimulation as your orgasm squirts out of you, soaking his face & hair, dripping off onto your now wet couch & he has to forcefully kickstart his brain & pulls you off his cock as your body stops tensing up so much.
"S-sorry, didn't know I c-could even do tha-" you whimper, panting. "Heyyyy don't apologise, that's the hottest thing I have ever ever seen." Felix cuts you off before he kisses you, your own orgasm now transferring onto your face & you groan into his lips at such a dirty yet hot act.
"You wanna keep going? We don't need to or anything, no pressure!" He blabbers out, glossy eyes looking into your completely blown out ones. "You can actually keep going? I'm surprised, follow me." You respond, giving him a cheeky smile as you use all your strength to properly balance yourself as you stand up & take Felix's hand, giggling as you lead him across your vanilla smelling apartment, the naked, cum soaked & sweaty blonde following your lead, letting his other hand wander over your frame, holding your waist & giving your ass a spank.
Felix kicks the bedroom door shut behind him, only taking a second to admire the decorations in your bedroom before he is plopping you on the bed & getting on top of you, his hand resting on the bed beside your head as he uses his other hand to start toying with your clit gently, not wanting to overstimulate you too much & your hips thrust towards his fingers on instinct.
"Put it in, Felix, please, want it inside." you purr, your hand grazing over his abs with your nails before grabbing onto his still hard cock & pumping it slowly, it still being wet with your spit & his hips jerk into your hand, a growl coming from his chest, spit almost leaving his lips.
"Really? Your cunt seems more than happy with just my finger, soaking for me." he smirks as he bites his bottom lip, trying to not let his own moan slip out from how turned on he actually is as he speeds up his motion on your clit in a messy manner, the wetness making his fingers slightly slip. "Please Lix, don't you want it?" you ask as a rhetorical question as your breath is staggering, trying to get more friction from his small fingers & Felix chuckles lightly as he begins blushing.
"You got a con-" "just use it without, I'm on the pill, promise." you speak up, a convincing look in your eyes. Felix nods & tries to compose himself with the nerves, honestly scared if he is gonna cum almost instantly.
He spreads your legs a bit further with his knee as he leans backwards on his knees, his cock poking the inside of your thigh as he kisses the parts of your legs he can reach while you're holding them & you melt into his kisses. "You're so pretty, want you to myself." he murmurs, mostly to himself but he doesn't take his eyes off yours & your ears turn as red as your cheeks.
"Then take me, I'm waiting on you." you remark, biting your lip as you smile up at him, silently praying his cock will slip inside you & not just poke against it. Felix's freckles become surrounded by a rosey colour & he moves his cock with his hand & drags it up & down your folds, making you both sigh in contempt.
You can both hear the light squelching sounds as his cock grinds through your wetness & it bumps against your clit every time his cock moves, making you grow beyond impatient & you reach down to try nudge his penis but he swats your hand away before you can reach it.
"Don't be so pushy, I'm about to cum as it is." he half jokes & you giggle at his words & he returns the action as he lets a glob of spit fall directly onto your cunt & it clenches around air as it dribbles down your clit & Felix sighs to himself at the sight as he pumps himself few times, slowly before he aligns himself up & slowly pushes himself inside until his balls hit against your skin & he whines as he feels your warmth, taking in the feeling of how tight & wet you still are despite an orgasm.
Your toes curl as he buries himself to the hilt, him filling you in such a delicious way, not too deep that it's uncomfortable but you can still feel it already snuggled up against your G-spot & you're honestly surprised he hasn't came yet with how desperate he's been all night.
"You're filling me up so well Lixie, m-move please." you plead & Felix has to take a moment to collect himself, he is honestly shocked that you have lasted this long, usually, the very few girls he has been with & his one short term ex would be falling asleep after giving him one orgasm or two maximum, not letting him to fully ever tire himself out so for someone he has met online only no longer than ten days ago who is actually able to keep up with him, he thinks it's a complete match made in heaven & he thinks his endless prayers have been answered.
Felix holds his breath as he moves his hips backwards before pushing back in, watching your face before picking up the pace. "Y-you look so pretty, p-perfect tits." he babbles as he stares at them, his eyes switching between your face & your boobs bouncing with each thrust, his lips parted & also shiny with his spit from where he has been constantly licking at them, his bottom one a bit redder than the top from where he has been nibbling at it all night.
"Go harder, p-please, you're s-so beauti, fuck." you stutter, your fingers reaching to pinch your nipples, your eyes going cross eyed, your pussy completely gushing wetness around Felix's base, clenching uncontrollably.
Felix growls at your words as he picks up his pace & he lets out a high pitched squeal as he pulls out & cums, it landing all over your lower stomach & a few drops landing just under your tits.
Felix pants & you remove one of your hands from your nipple & drag it down to smother the tip of your fingers in his orgasm & you hold it up to his lips & he looks down at you, a devilish look in his eyes as he opens his mouth that tiny bit extra to accept your fingers & you both hum in unison as he swallows around your fingers, letting out a hum of satisfaction.
You both don't break away eye contact as you flip you both over so you're now straddling him & Felix realises he is actually getting softer after orgasms & he basically has heart shaped eyes. "Still hard? You really are inane, match made in heaven." you purr, slightly repositioning so your bare cunt is resting on his slightly softened cock, but it really doesn't take long for it to get hard enough again as your pussy snuggs itself right on top of it.
"I told you I can go all night, You're just too good." He replies, his blonde hair wet with sweat & sticking to his pretty face & you hum at his words. "Do you think you can handle one more, hmm?" you ask, already reaching back to fondle his balls again & he nods instantly, his facial expression going back to a needy, desperate one straight away & you can't help but giggle as you pick up his pretty, red cock in your hand again before sinking back down onto your new favourite thing you've ever touched or saw.
You sink back down until your bodies fully connect & a shiver shoots up your spine & you let out a broken hum as you use whatever strength you somehow have to begin moving your hips in a comfortable way as you begin bouncing, laying your hands on Felix's abs for support, not failing to admire how good they look & feel.
"Holy shit, like-just like that y/n, why are you s-so good, shoulda met way-s-sooner" he rambles as his hands become restless, dragging over your ass, tummy, waist, tits & he drags his fingers over your nipples, making you hiss at the feeling.
"Cum with me, mkay? Paint me inside too, dare ya" you cry, your eyes struggling to stay open as you have to physically stop yourself from flopping forwards but its no use as he latches his arms around your back & pulls you towards him & plants his feet to the floor & uses the rest of his little energy to begin fucking up into you at a harsh pace, making you squeal.
You unbury your face from his neck & you lock lips with him & you both exchange drool, it having a slightly salty taste from his own cum he suckled from your digits just a few minutes ago as felix starts to rub over your left nipple, pinching it & it makes you yelp.
You begin clenching uncontrollably & you start to struggle to kiss him back & your legs begin to feel like jelly & start to give out & if it wasn't for felix basically holding you in place you wouldn't even be moving. "F-felix, fuck, yes! go'n cum, s-so-too good" you wail, your eyes scrunched together as you break your lips apart due to none of you actually being able to breathe, both of your lips a way darker shade, your lips & chins covered in each others drool by this point.
"Cum inside? It's comi-coming, s-shit, you g-gonna take it all?" he stutters, his brain trying its hardest to float away & he is basically forcing himself to keep even a single thought inside. "yes, please, please pl-please! I'll be so good, keep it in for you, c-can eat it out me later" you respond, your pussy dripping a white ring around his base, soaking his pubes.
"G- such a good g-girl, it's c-coming, cumming." He screeches in s raspy voice & as his cock pulsates in you as his balls drain that little bit extra & as you feel another few thick ropes up into your cervix, your own orgasm pours over you like a bucket of cold water & you let out a shriek as your entire body begins shaking in his hold & you throw your head against him & you bite into his shoulder, making him whine as his hips slow down.
You both stay like this for a minute, just catching your breath back for the most part, but you can't really help but enjoy listening to his heart racing inside his chest.
Felix slowly pulls his now actually softening cock out of you, a few droplets of both his cum & your own wetness dripping back onto his pelvis & he wraps his arms around you but then moves them down to his sides. "Are you sue you wanna hug? I-i don't need aftercare if you don't wanna do that, I know it was just casual sex." he says in a soft voice, sounding a bit upset despite trying to sound casual.
You pick your head up & look down at his pretty face & see the slight pout & confused look on your face & you 'tut' at him jokingly before you wriggle your hand under his neck & rub your nose against his neck. "Don't be so silly, Lix, i'll not just leave you after you just had four orgasms, I'll get you some water n stuff once my breath is back." you reply, weaving the hand that's resting under his neck into his soft but wet hair & fiddle with it in your fingers.
Despite you not being able to see it, Felix can't help but smile at your words as he returns his arms around you & relaxes a lot more. "You're a softie, who woulda thought. I've never had anyone or anything make me actually fully enjoy an orgasm until tonight, I'm actually drained for the first time ever." he chuckles & you can't stop yourself from softly giggling. "Glad to hear, I'm actually exhausted though so we aren't going again till I get feeling back in my body." Felix simpers at your words & nods his head.
⭑・゚゚・*:༅。.。༅:*゚:*:✼✿  ✿✼:*゚:༅。.。༅:*・゚゚・⭑
Felix doesn't stay the night, him not wanting to overstay & you not knowing if you should ask him or not, thinking it was too intimate to do so.
Felix leaves after another hour or so, you fed him some cereal as it was all you could be bothered to make & you gave him a bottle of water & he dug through your drawers to find some sleep clothes & helped you clean up with a damp towel from your bathroom.
You both agreed to stay in contact with each other, for sexual reasons... obviously, but you both start sending each other memes, random photos of things Felix bakes, pretty flowers you walk past on your way to work & so on... that's how its all started for you both.
A/N: I think I liked the idea of this more than it actually turned on so I'm sorry if I haven't done this as much justice as I could have done, I've been going through a lot lately with a lot of personal issues & I got admitted so I'm also sorry for not being active, I'm gonna get back on track soon enough. I have a lot of requests & I am trying to get around to them so please just be patient, feel free to send me thoughts/asks but thoughts get published first since they're a lot smaller. I hope you all enjoyed this piece though if you've reached this far<3
->Anon list: Open!
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idyllic-ghost · 5 months ago
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title: Stay in Character! pairing: vernon x gn!reader genre: established relationship, fluff, warnings: reader has a sister with a kid, mentions of childbirth, mentions of stress, anxiety over moving in with a partner synopsis: You're on the verge of panicking - you still have moving boxes to pack and move into your boyfriend's apartment, but you can't leave the fact that your sister is giving birth to her second child while you're babysitting her first. However, your stress slowly dissipates when you walk into your cluttered kitchen and see your boyfriend playing pretend with your niece. wordcount: 5.9k
rating: PG 15
a/n: i keep wanting to write soft fluffy vernon blurbs idk what's happening
Disclaimer: The scenarios and depictions in my works are fictional and do not represent real-life situations. They do not aim to reflect the complexities of any culture, city, or individual. All characters are entirely fictional, regardless of names or descriptions.
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✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
The bumbling sounds from your tiny kitchen caught your attention as soon as you got out of the phone call with your sister's husband. Once one anxious thought was gone, another one appeared out of the blue - what were they doing in there? They weren't messing with the boxes, were they? You took a deep breath, trying to calm down enough for you to have an interaction without yelling.
Rolling up your sleeves, you walked into your kitchen to deal with the next situation. The walls were covered with stacked boxes, so you almost couldn't see the old wallpaper. The noises were coming from your kitchen table, which still wasn't packed up. Vernon was sitting at the table with your niece, and the two of them had put out a paper plate with whatever snacks they could find, three glasses, and a bottle of water.
Your shoulders relaxed as you watched the two of them play pretend. They had clearly been trying to help you pack but had gotten distracted by your miscellaneous items. Vernon was wearing one of your scarves on his head and an old pair of sunglasses you had forgotten about - your niece wearing a matching pair. However, as soon as he saw you come in, he took off the glasses and sent you a gentle smile.
"Is everything okay?" he asked.
It was all so ridiculous. Your sister was in the middle of an unexpectedly early childbirth, in the middle of you getting ready to move into your boyfriend's apartment, and here he was: playing dress-up with your niece. In some weird way, it was just what you needed - how Vernon could know you had no idea.
"She's fine," you finally replied with a tired smile. "It was a little bit of a surprise, but everything seems to be okay... what are the two of you doing?"
"We're just-"
"Stay in character!" your niece complained.
Vernon mouthed "Sorry," before putting the sunglasses back on and turning back to your niece. With his usual, matter-of-fact voice, he asked her what she thought about the weather. Your niece picked up her glass and took a sip of the water, making an exaggerated "ahh" as she put it back down.
"Too much rain," she responded with a nonchalant wave of her hand.
You could see Vernon have to restrain himself from laughing, his hand flying up to cover his smile. After clearing his throat, he nodded in agreement. You should be packing up the last of your stuff, the moving truck will arrive soon, and you should probably text your sister's husband again to ask him to send you updates. But right now, you could feel how tired you were in your bones. So, you sat down on the third chair and let Vernon pour you a glass of water. Then, he picked up the paper plate and held it out to you.
"Gummy worm?" he asked.
"How old are those?" You chuckled as you inspected the candies on the plate.
"I have no idea," he admitted. "But the cookies are from last week, I think."
You took a cookie and silently thanked him. Vernon and your niece continued their conversation about rain, which took a sharp turn when Vernon mentioned thunder - which was apparently very controversial in your niece's eyes. Any anxious feelings you had over moving in with Vernon were slowly disappearing. For a moment, you could truly let go of everything as Vernon kept your niece busy - and if he acted like this in a moment of crisis, maybe the two of you would do well living together.
"Bathroom break!" your niece suddenly exclaimed, clapping her hands together once to signal that the scene was over.
She hopped off her chair and walked away to your small bathroom. You had already taken all of the boxes out of there, so you knew that she would be okay on her own.
"She's a little director," Vernon said.
"She is," you murmured.
He gave you a long look, a silent "Are you really okay?" to which you responded with a nod. Vernon moved his chair closer to yours, wrapping his arms around you and slowly patting your head.
"You're doing good, babe," he muttered against the top of your head.
"Thank you."
"I'll go back to packing up and you could sit with her for a bit," he suggested. "Or I could do anything else you need."
"Packing sounds good," you hummed. "I just need to make sure she's not feeling neglected or anything, you know? My sister was worried."
Vernon let go of you and grabbed your hand to give it a comforting squeeze. He was still wearing the scarf and the sunglasses, and you could no longer keep a straight face. You snort and turn away from him, trying to shield yourself from breaking out into even more laughter.
"What?" he asked and tried to make you look at him again. "Am I not pretty?"
After taking a deep breath, you look back at him with a contained grin. Vernon cocks his head at you, clearly aware of the way he looks now but also determined to keep you smiling. Your niece eventually came back from the bathroom and climbed back onto her chair. The two of you looked at her expectantly as she cleared her throat.
"Bathroom break's over!" she chimed.
"Honey," you said carefully. "Is it okay if Vernon goes away to pack some more stuff and I stay here with you?"
Your niece glanced back and forth between the two of you before extending her hand to Vernon. He carefully removed his scarf and glasses and placed them into her small, outstretched palm.
"You've been replaced!" your niece exclaimed dramatically as she handed you the items. "I'll give you the roll as long as you stay in character!"
As you and Vernon erupted into laughter, your niece continued to mimic the voice of a director before she eventually joined you in your mirth. Everything that could go wrong today, did go wrong - yet, it felt bearable with Vernon by your side. Observing his banter with your niece might have seemed like a man simply engaging in make-believe with his partner's niece others, but to you, it was a deeply serene and comforting scene. You knew with certainty that your future was in reliable hands.
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thatlittlered · 5 months ago
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lovefool | aaron hotchner
warning(s): 18+, detailed description of sexual acts (m!masturbation) under the cut!
GIF by @scuttling
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author's note: feast on this, my metaphorical children, because more and better things are coming very soon. I also made a masterlist for your reading convenience.
Follow me @MadeofLilies at Ao3 and let me know if you want to be tagged here.
-.-.-
Aaron finds himself quite disoriented when he wakes up next to you. Smooth cotton on his cheek, mellow morning light peeking through the blinds. The warmth of a soft body prevails over all. Chests touching, limbs entangled. It is almost becoming too warm under the covers, or it might just be the rush of realization.
The lovely smell of your freshly washed hair brings him closer; so close that he might nudge your cheek with his nose if he moves a single inch but he doesn’t dare. It would be the first ever act of intimacy between you in daylight.
You must have felt his breath on your face because you stir until there’s no space left between you. There is nowhere to look but in each other’s eyes.
It should feel weirder than it does.
He looks so young under this light; his face littered with moles that you would like to kiss. His hand dares to move to your eyebrow and settles the hair there tenderly before moving downward. The touch of his thumb might as well be a kiss when he’s tracing your cheekbone, your nose, your mouth.
“Good morning.”
His voice is hoarse and it makes you laugh.
“Good morning, Aaron.”
Neither of you wants to move, but you decide to take the plunge, “I’m going to make some coffee, okay?”
“Okay.”
He takes his time getting up, looking around your room for more pieces of you to remember. He is drawn to your vanity where your perfume and hairbrush lie. You’ve left out a toothbrush for him; ever thoughtful.
When he finally joins you in the small kitchen, you’re a sight for sore eyes and you smile when you see him, pushing a steaming cup of coffee his way.
“Are you hungry?”
He sits so sweetly across from you on the kitchen island.
“I’m okay, thank you.”
Your feet touch, but neither of you moves away.
“You don’t eat breakfast?”
“I have cereal with Jack, mostly because he asks me to.”
The ease with which he had touched and kissed you the night before has dissipated, ephemeral confidence melting away to leave behind a man unsure of what to say or do. He wishes you had met a long time ago, when he could have given you the best parts of him. His best now is… meager. Those parts of him seem long gone, or more accurately, forcefully taken.
Now everything is an impossible decision to make. Every moment of intimacy comes with the fear of imminent darkness. He must dare to break way.
“We have cereal.”
You get up to grab the box from the shelf and when you turn around, he’s almost caging you between the counter and his body. His hands are on your face again, holding you in place so he can kiss you with the taste of coffee on his tongue, which begs for entry.
You both willfully ignore the tension building up between your bodies and how easy it would be to give in completely right now. It’s too soon, way too soon. He was simply taken with the smallest bit of skin that had peaked through when you reached to grab the box; wanted to remember what you taste like, to break away.
His hands are still on your face as he speaks, forehead to forehead.
“I can’t stay long; I have to pick up Jack from his aunt’s. I promised him we’d spend the day together.”
“That’s okay, I understand.”
He kisses you again but lingers, one last taste before he has to go.
“I would really like to take you out to dinner on our next day off.”
-.-.-
The days that follow are torture. You’re all drowning in backed up cases and the endless stream of paperwork that follows. The peaceful night of sleeping in each other’s arms and the coffee laced kisses are but a distant memory amidst this chaos.
Yet, in the rare moments when everything slows, it’s hard to keep his eyes off you, especially today. Especially when you’re wearing that red blouse. Aaron’s seen it before, appreciated it just as much as then against your complexion, but there’s something exhilarating, sinful about having seen it hang in your closet. It puts everything in a new perspective; this tantalizing secret between the two of you waiting to be realized again and again and again, if he can help it.
If only you had the time.
It takes all the self-restraint he can find within him not to approach you at the hotel. It would be easy, so easy, wouldn’t raise the faintest suspicion if he just knocked on your door after hours and you could talk – just a little. But, he can’t. He won’t. There are still limits.
Emotional exhaustion is a trap, with the mind begging for rest and the body ignoring its pleas till collapse. His body begs for you. Pleads to be held and kissed and gently lulled to sleep now that it knows the feeling.
The shower pressure is sharp, unkind, nothing like you, but the warm fog that follows… he can almost see before him the soft plane of your bare shoulder, the drops of water on your collarbone. He had not dared to look past, but he can only imagine and oh, he does. He could have surrendered himself completely, laid on top of you in the small bathtub in a mess of clothed and naked limbs. He could have allowed -begged of you- to touch him, feel any part of him you wanted to and then grant him the gift of doing the same. The smoothness of your wet body under his hands, the desperation in your kisses.
He can almost feel you on his fingertips right now, so, he gives in. Takes himself in hand to relieve the almost painful feeling. It’s muscle memory really, there should be nothing truly sensual about it but he can’t keep the images out of his head. His body recalls every detail of your touch and his mind takes advantage.
Images and feign sensations of your feather light touch on his stomach, trailing down to pay attention where he most needs you to. Your thumb presses delicately on the head, teasing him into a desperate awakening of his every sense. He is leaking for you already and you don’t let it go to waste, dragging your thumb up and down slowly until his precum spreads all over. It makes it easier to go further, pull the extra skin down gently and enjoy the sheer magnitude of him.
He jolts in your hand at the movement, but stays perfectly still after in fear that you will stop. You wouldn’t, not ever. A large vein runs on the bottom part of his cock and you can’t help but trace it, watching the way he reacts. He jolts again, begging for more, more of whatever you can give him and you take the hint. Your hand wraps around his base completely, enveloping him in softness he would die for, before beginning to move up and down in long, slow motions.
You kiss his cheek, his jaw, his neck and he is about to collapse in front of you, nothing but a desperate, needy mess for you to play with. He is painfully close, can’t possibly even keep his eyes open and you can tell, so you go faster, harder. He comes with your name in his mouth.
Everything slows down from there. The spell of the warm shower fog once again wears off and when he opens his eyes, it’s painfully clear you’ve taken over his whole existence, so much so that he must fantasize about the things he’d like to do to you, and things he’d like you to do to him, in order to get through the night.
Come morning, when you’re all gathered in the jet and going home, he can’t look you in the eye.
You notice.
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