#and if you just don't participate you're treated as boring

[catgirltoes]

Gotta be honest the constant objectification of women's bodies is a bit tiring sometimes.

[vhswolf]

McLaren Christmas Dinner | Landoscar x Reader

Warnings: none I think, just a jealous Oscar wanting to go home

It's time for the big McLaren dinner party, the dinner I thought I wasn't going to participate in. I've been dating Lando and Oscar for a couple of months now, it was something that was difficult to know if it was going to be a great idea or an awful one, none of us had done this before, dating one person is hard to imagine two and imagine one of them being your teammate. Even everything being a recipe for disaster, we made it work. But the idea of going to a full on McLaren celebration was off my mind until Lando said we need to have a meeting (a stupid way we had to say that we needed to talk).

"I'm the bringer... bringer? I bring an idea for you two."

"We're listening." I said, cuddling up on Oscar's arm as Lando stood in front of us with a big smile on his face.

"Since we can bring a plus one to the McLaren dinner, what about we bring our girl?" Lando said like it was an obvious idea.

"I agree." Oscar said.

"Agree? Boys, are you guys thinking? That's a bad idea." I said sitting up.

"Why?"

"Because people will want to know who I'm, and you're going to say what? Our girlfriend? I don't think PR would approve of me being girlfriend of one of you."

"We can say you're our mutual friend." Osc said.

"Handsy like the two of you are? I don't see this working."

"You're overthinking it, babe." Lando sat by my side. "First of all, we can keep our hands to ourselves if needed and nobody will be there to out us, because if they do, they lose their job."

"And, they wouldn't believe we got luck enough to date you." Osc said, and Lan nodded.

"Yes, Osc is right and to be honest they think Osc is too boring to even try anything like this."

"I'm listening, Lando."

"I'm not saying it, McLaren people are, and come on, you look like a church boy, Oscar." Oscar rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Whatever, they won't figure anything, love, we promise you."

"This is risky as fuck."

"We just want to show up our girl a little bit, can you please go?"

"I'll go, but if anything happens, you both are the ones going to the PR meetings, not me."

"Deal." They both said together.

I got a gala worth dress, it was one of the Clio Peppiatt ones, and I asked for them to personalize it with a little McLaren logo in papaya, it was so beautiful, popping out in the middle of the whole black and silver dress. Both of my boys in black suits, Oscar with a traditional tie in dark dark midnight blue, and Lan with a black bow tie, both looking like a Disney prince. The two drivers were stopping at every step talking to everyone, I was a bit behind, not wanting to be seen by anyone, but it didn't work for long.

"This is (Y/n)." I heard my name as I was looking around, completely lost in my own thoughts. I looked at them and saw Zak Brown looking at me, so I smiled.

"Hi."

"Hello, nice to meet you." He looked at both boys and back at me. "So, you're friends with my drivers? How come I never saw you?"

"I was never invited to the paddock." I joked and Lando looked at me shocked.

"What? That's not fair!"

"Not a lie, though."

"You two need to learn how to treat a pretty girl, that's why you guys don't have a girlfriend." He shook his head and I chuckled. "You will be very welcome anytime."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome, and you two, invite the girl, c'mon."

"We will." Oscar said, looking at me, then Zak walked away. "We never invited you?" Oscar asked and I laughed.

"Sorry, what I was supposed to say? That I didn't want to go?"

"Now you're going, I don't care what you say." Oscar said in a low voice before walking away.

"Uhh, Osc is mad, you're fucked." Lando whispered in my ear.

"Osc!" I called, walking a bit faster to get to him. "Don't be mad."

"I'm not." He is.

"I'm sorry, baby." I whispered in his ear and he looked at me, but didn't say anything. He walked to the bar and Lando put his hand on my shoulder.

"Didn't work, did it?"

"Nope, can you talk to him?"

"I can try, but I won't be getting punished because of you." He said walking to where Oscar was.

"Hello." I hear a voice behind me, when I turned I saw Pato O'ward with a big smile on his face. "I'm Patricio O'ward, but you can call me Pato, nice to meet you."

"Hi, I'm (Y/n), nice to meet you too, Pato." I smiled.

"I never saw you around, I'm wrong?"

"You're not, I'm Lando and Oscar's friend." He nodded.

"I love your dress, you look good in McLaren." He joked.

"Thank you, maybe I'll use more McLaren." He nodded.

"You should." His flirty aura is bigger than Lando's and I thought this was impossible. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Do you..." Before he finished his question, I felt a hand on my waist, and then another one.

"Hey, Pato!" Lando said smiling. "Everything OK?" Pato nodded.

"Yes, I was just saying her dress is gorgeous."

"I agree." Oscar said, squeezing my waist even more.

"That was all, see you guys around." Pato said and walked away.

"Pato, really?" Oscar said through clenched teeth.

"I was just being nice." I turned to look at them and get away from the touches on my waist. Both men had a drink in their hand, Lando was more in a happy mood than Oscar.

"He wanted to fuck you, you don't need to be nice in this case."

"Osc, it is not like I was going to give him my number or anything."

"Is kinda funny, Osc, did you see his face?" Osc bit the inside of his cheek, trying to suppress his smile.

"That was nice, but still, no more talking with that womanizer."

"You say it like your boyfriend isn't a womanizer too."

"Former womanizer! Now I'm a family man." Lando said, crossing his arms. Oscar chuckled and shook his head.

"I can't be mad at you for long, can I?" He ran his fingers through my hair and sighed. "I love you."

"Love you too, baby."

"Too much for pretending to be besties?" Lando said looking at the scene. Oscar rolled his eyes and pulled away.

"I want to go home."

"After dinner." Lando said, hugging Oscar shoulders. Osc nodded, and we started to walk off, but not before listening to a person behind us commenting.

"Does Oscar know Lando wants to fuck his girlfriend?" We looked at each other and laughed.

[impish-baby]

Yan! Caregiver! Step father but more leaning on the yandere side UGH😫 MY DADDY ISSUES😭😭

-👀✨

Ahhh, this concept is giving me brainrot- such a sweet idea!!

Yan Caregiver! Stepdad Headcanons-🏈💚

🏈 - stepdad that is so excited to be a father?? He knows you aren't a little kid, but you still need your parents even as an adult! (Please let him take care of you-)

💚 - Hey, champ! do you want to go to the mall? The movies? You name a place and he'll take you! Seriously, he does not care about the outrageous amount of money he's willing to spend. Do you know how many birthdays he's missed? How many holidays?? He has to catch up!

🏈 - tries his best to participate in your hobbies/interests even if he doesn't have a clue about it. He just wants to hang out with his kid! Will sit through anything no matter how boring it is to stepdad if you're there sitting beside him. (If you want to do something he likes with him?? He's over the moon and running to buy you ice cream as compensation for dealing with your old man's lame hobbies)

💚 - feircly overprotective of you... can and will seriously injure anyone he sees as a danger. If someone does hurt you? If you get hurt in general? He's treating it like the worst thing that's ever happened, even if it's a tiny scrape in reality. You think your hulking stepfather might actually be tearing up as bandages your leg... it's just.. you're his baby and he let you get hurt! what kind of a man is he-

🏈 - is the same way if you get sick! He acts like you're on your deathbed, it's impossible not to feel at least a little smothered as he hovers around wherever you're laying down and insits on taking care of you. (You might even find yourself stuck in your parent's bed! He feels a lot better when you're somewhere close.) It makes you feel a bit like a kid again with how fussy he is...

💚 - he... did miss out on you being little, huh? That's ok.. he.. he can make up for it! Don't you worry, sweetheart, Daddy is going to fix everything.

[saeun]

geto, above all, will do anything for his little girl. whether it's spending hundreds on a ridiculously large bouncy castle or a miniature designer bag. whichever fits her wants at best, she'll get it. but there's just one peculiar thing geto finds himself not being able to give her: the answer to her question.

with every ounce of his attention focused on the teriyaki chicken, he tries to quietly prepare a simple meal for dinner. right now, you're participating in your daily naps which lead to daddy-daughter alone time. a four-year-old girl keeps him company during the hard times without your presence.

if only geto knew how many questions a child can throw at him under a minute. he responded to most of her questions automatically, however, there was just one particular question that rendered him answer-less.

"daddy, why do you like mommy?" a harmless question. it doesn't reek of any deeper meaning nor was it meant to throw geto into a spiralling abyss. but why does he like you? when did he fall in love?

he wonders whether it was because you looked at him up and down as if he said the world's most offensive thing or maybe because you accidentally slapped him when he snuck up on you — actually, he vividly remembers and will continue to be embarrassed by that.

it all happened like this: you were waiting for the vending machine to deliver your snack. obviously, you were minding your business, but someone else wasn't. it took nothing but a left turn for geto suguru to stop in his tracks. as if mischievous music had been cued, geto smirks to himself. he has discovered his plan and his victim. no, he doesn't know you, nor do you know him. he's just very, very bored and needs entertainment.

geto sneaks his way to you. his posture was oddly cartoonish for his age: large, quiet tiptoe steps, hands brought up to his chest, eyes squinted for extra focus. according to the getology sugurist chronicles, one must imagine themselves as silence to achieve ultimate silence. real gangsters move in silence, they say.

"hey—" his sentence was unfortunately cut short. the sudden physical contact against his face left him breathless. he dares for whoever slapped him to not — oh!

is this what they call romance? "first love at sight" or whatever the hell satoru said? whatever it is, he's blushing. geto didn't expect such a beautiful, majestically shocked, and a tad bit disgusted lady to be bestowing him with her gaze. right now, as of this moment, he feels like saying, "haha, no girl has ever hit me before," but he won't. he has his own limits for cringing.

"sorry, i got startled," you apologized, reaching your hand out to soothe his cheek.

as if it's a default reaction, geto steps back. "don't worry, it's okay."

"please, let me treat it. it was my fault," you insisted.

"no, no. i'm okay, really."

sighing, you hand him the snack you ordered from the vending machine. "then take this."

and from there, the story of his love with you became history.

whirling himself out of the flashback, geto redirects his attention to his daughter. truly, he doesn't know what exactly made him love you. from the slight crush to marriage, geto's fell in love over and over. there's not just a single moment that hooked him to you. it was just you. not a moment, not a memory. just you. but of course, he isn't going to get sentimental with his little girl!

choosing to go with your first encounter, he answers her, "your mom slapped me and i immediately found her attractive."

"oh.." a confused look dawns the four-year-old. her head tilts to the side, eyebrows furrowed with lips twisted to the side. is daddy crazy? she can only wonder to herself.

geto's amused by her reaction. her confused look is replica to yours — kind of makes him miss you, if he's going to be honest. but as stated in the getology sugurist chronicles (2), one mustn't awaken the slumbering mother hen. he learnt from experience.

[horrorshow]

Can you talk about why you think blocking and moving on is a bad thing? I thought it was a way to curate your space and avoid drama

idk maybe i'm too idealistic but fandom is a much more friendlier, welcoming, supportive, creative, engaging, active, diverse and interesting space when it's treated like a community where people are encouraged to participate and talk about their interests and where there's space for niche or more unpopular opinions without these people having to worry about being blocked and feel unwelcome by the majority of the fandom they are in. i can't stand how blocking everyone you disagree with has become the first thing to do.

you say its 'to curate your experience'. but blocking people does not only curate YOUR experience. you're also forcefully curating other users' experiences. and not for the better.

people say 'i will block you for literally anything' and then those same people wonder why engagement is down, why no one sends asks, why no one reblogs, why rarely anyone talks in the tags anymore and why this place feels so dead and boring and quiet. i wonder why!!!!

people treat real people as annoying ads they can dispose of at their whim. but that's not how a fandom or a site like tumblr works. (besides, if you really care about people curating their own experience you wouldn't block people. you can filter and blacklist and never see them again while still granting them the same freedom instead of actively making their experience worse.)

you say its to avoid drama. but seeing a post you dont agree with is not 'drama'. and blocking is not solving anything except for you personally. fandom was more fun when we remembered that every user is a real person you share a space with, and probably some mutuals as well, so you find a way to live with each other. starting with a restraining order seems a bit excessive and is not contributing to anything. it's not that hard to be respectful and tolerate others and acknowledge people have different opinions and interests and still co-exist in peace. its not that hard to be nice to people and try to find common ground with them and interact with the stuff you DO like. you do this in every aspect of your real life, so why not online?

i hear you say: 'but that requires WORK and i don't NEED to do any of that bc i can just block them'.

yeah, you can try to create your own bubble and only hang out with like minded people but you wont EVER fully achieve that (no matter how much you block, social media WILL keep feeding you posts you disagree with bc it makes them money). social media WILL pressure you into an 'us vs. them' mentality where you constantly feel like everything online is a threat or an argument you have to win and where being mean and unnuanced gives you the most notes and where you don't even see, let alone be able to treat, other users as people anymore bc you don't interact with them anymore other than to block or fight them. that's not how i want it to be online. it's not fun to me. and maybe i'm a pessimist but i think it will eventually be the death of online fandom and sites like tumblr. look at the state of twitter right now. DOES blocking give you a better experience in the long run? i doubt that it does. overall, i think it makes people even less tolerable and more vulnerable to hate and fear mongering, and social media an even more hostile place.

it's everything i hate about social media and everything i want to fight against and WILL fight against. i won't pretend my meager contribution will change anything, but i LIKE to just scroll past posts i don't vibe with and not see every argument online as a personal offense. it keeps me curious. most posts aren't that bad when you know the person behind it. i mean, you do you, i'm not gonna say what you should or shouldn't do bc that's up to you, but i recommend it: free yourself of the block button and bring back supportive user communities based on a shared love for the same thing and focus on what you have in common with people, just like you would do in real life. save the block button for the rotten apples who DO keep trying to pick fights and exclude others.

(which is, now that i think about it, probably the main difference: most people see the block button as a neutral way to prevent worse. but. that's only the case on an individual level. and treating everything online as an individual choice to which there are no further consequences, especially if they happen on a larger scale, is already a loss.)

[sk3tch404]

Late Night Hanma Blurb

A/n: Thought abt this during an itty-bitty road trip today. Smoker Hanma does smth to the chemicals in my brain. Forgive me for any lengthy bad writing. I've had a long day and I just wanna yip yap about one of my fav crazies 🙇

CW: Hanma can give two shits about your lung health but chooses not to when he feels like it, intimidation, threats of forced drug usage, sometimes forced participation in violent activities, thoughts of lovers suicide/murder(?), and whatever other yappin I put in here.

Hanma who smokes a fuck ton and doesn't mind giving you the good ol' second-hand effects of it, but absolutely detests you doing it on your own.

He snatches the stick from your mouth and holds it up and away from you with a small grit in his teeth. Hanma glares down in some curiosity but clearly squints in irritation.

"The hell is this? Don't tell me I'm being a bad influence on you now. If I catch you with one of these again, I won't let you off the hook so easily. You got it, Y/n?"

When you retort, telling him it's no different from when he does it and it is your own choice whether he likes it or not, he merely scoffs with a tilt of his narrow head. Throwing down the cigarette, the sound of his sneaker stomping and scraping it out against the pavement echos through the air with an annoying presence. Shuji demands the rest of your stash with a looming stare that can only put you into a state of sinking discimfort.

"Come on, don't be stubborn. Ya know, if you wanna do it so bad, why don't you try the whole pack? Mine too since it's a shitload better than that cheap stuff."

Reluctant on suffocation and early lung cancer, you begrudgingly hand over your smokes to him. Hanma smacks down on the box with an evidently loud shot of noise and slides it out of your palm--- pocketing it. He stretches out narrow smile as he leans down towards you.

"See, now it ain't so hard to listen."

He's still ticked off by the fact you think you can do whatever to your body without his permission, but since Shuji is so generous, he'll let you learn from your mistakes. See, he can be nice.

Don't test him though. Next time you're caught defying his selfish wishes, he's beating you down with degrading language and probably also beating whoever was involved. The convenience store employee that sold you the cigs, vape, or maybe even chewing tobacco? Yeah he's taking out his held back frustration on them. Bro is jumping over the counter and tearing their shit up.

Avoiding him because of his brutal and honest-to-God psychopathic personality? Now that's just cruel. Shuji is dragging your ass by the back of your shirt and pushes you to his motorcycle. The leopard print on the back of the bike makes you wanna barf every time you see it, but you got to keep it down if you wanna have enough energy to deal with him. He'll take you out no matter where you are at in that point of time and make you remember who he is; who you think you're messing with.

"Y/n, how many times do I have to tell you? Aim for the nose. That's easy for amateurs like you. Actually, lemme show you how to really deliver a jaw breaker-"

Yeah, he'll show you just how bad it can get with some random thugs on the street. You should be grateful with how gentle he's treating you. Instead of ending up with facial fractures, you have nice dates and thoughtful gifts. He's even teaching you a few tricks. How lucky can you get?

"I'm all done. Shit, I'm starved. Let's go grab a bite to eat, kay?"

Hanma thinks the only way you'll ever keep paying attention to him is if he keeps you and your actions in line. If you go off doing your own thing, his usually unmoving heart can't just stand there and watch you slowly leave him. Despite the negativity be brings into your life, he actually gets really fuckin anxious when he doesn't know or understand what you're doing. It's so troublesome how you make him feel. Yeah, being bored as shit is bad, but seeing you, the only thing that could ever bring him down to his knees unwillingly, slip away with nothing but disdain for him? Fuck no. He won't accept it. Shuji would rather kill you and then himself than have to bear the strange feeling of pain, or what other people call heartbreak, by his lonesome self.

Should he ever say he loves you, that would be the point of no return for the both of you. His hands have you tight in his clutches. No way out, no way back in for anyone else.

[askuemki]

@vivgst new thread <3 (I have the cut so it won't be a pain to scroll lol)

I've never watched Death Note, but I guess Ill just say L is my favorite since we share a name (technically) Honestly? my answer is simple w/ what animal Id be Almost ANY cat (not the flatfaced or folded ear ones though they can have some bad health issues :( ) Like if you're a domestic cat, you have the stuff to survive both in the wild, or in someone's house. You have super scenes of smell, night vision, claws, sharp teeth, AND probably enough smarts to not get eaten by dogs or smth. On the other hand with humans, at least 70% of the population would adore you, and maybe even take you in to pamper you. It would be very easy to get them to do your bidding since you'd be just some animal, and perhaps put above your caretaker's needs. Pets? Affection? Just act all adorable and stuff and they'll give it to you, cling on to them and they'll say they're your human now. On the other hand (or paw) there's the wild cats!! Still very cute. Still very cool. Now your defenses are upped by a ton, and people still find you cute. Though with how shitty environmental conditions are, and with the bigger cats slowly going to extinction :( , I may or may not just stick to domestic cats But hypothetically.. It would be neat to be either a snow leopard, tiger, or a jaguar. I love snow leopards for their big fluffy tails, and it would be cool to be able to roam through snow and stuff, but that seems to get a little boring from time to time. Love tigers for their stripes, I don't think they can roar..?? But that doesn't change anything. Think Tigers and Jaguars are both pretty efficient in survival, but I'd pick Jaguar just for their athletics and HUGE bite force (least from my 1st search). Or maybe, maybe not because there's an outfit/skin or two of Valeria's that are based on jaguars.. (or leopards, but ill go w/ jaguars) im obsessed w/ this woman man hdwhadwjadawnk OH ALSO ON THE TOPIC OF BIRDS??? AS FUN AS IT WOULD BE TO BE A MALE BIRD AND SHAKE YOUR COLORFUL BUM AROUND, THERE WAS A WHOLE ASS WAR W/ EMUS AND AUSTRALIA Honestly who wouldn't wanna be a relative of a dinosaur, but smaller and just as fucking scary Also for vacation.... I don't like going on vacation. I just like being in my sad little room, on the internet or drawing my ass off But, Id love to visit Japan and see their Ghibli Studio museum, it's so cool... Or even just go to a few hotels or smth here and there, I love their stellar technology, I love how everything is so cute or neat there, oh and I especially LOVE the social rules there, I'm a goody-two-shoes at heart and perfectly agree with being "nice"... Like yeah sure I may not like you or the opposite, but at least we can co-exist without biting our heads off (unlike the fucking us) and japan seems open to their culture being explored by others, so I'd totally love to (respectfully) participate in some traditions here and there OR I could visit Europe. Like not even a specific country? Just Europe. Cuz the US is like really fucking big, and a country like France is apparently as big as Texas. And it would be cool to take a week trip just exploring cultures and stuff (well everything except food, I'm a terrible picky eater ugh) Vacation in the US scares me tho, I'm fine where I'm at rn Maybe id be a little open to going to canada.. but bc of how they're treating the Palestine genoside rn maybe like later in life if they redeem themselves, but like the us? Fuck them too I think crocodiles r cute, but I wouldn't wanna go near one :3 Most of my relatives are either in the Philippines or Maryland, I barely know abt them now Never thought I'd be the one to be the gay cousin, ngl

[luminouslywriting]

Hi honey! If it’s Rosie asks you’re after then boy am I ready to deliver! I want to know everything about this man because I’m obsessed with him haha. But to start off… what is Rosie like at home? The war is over and domesticity starts to take over. Does he cook? Pamper you with breakfast in bed? Dance in the living room into the wee hours of the morning, completely loosing track of time? cuddles? Does he read out loud to you? How does he like to fall asleep and wake up with you? How is he when you’re both intimate? I have a feeling he is pretty demonstrative knowing that the two of you are alone and can fully express your passions for each other not having to worry about anyone else stepping in on or hearing you.

Oh Nonny, Domestic! Rosie has my entire heart and soul! Feel free to send me as many Rosie asks as you’d like haha 🥰 requests are open! Cut for length, more under the cut!

-Post-War Rosie is the gentlest and most patient man AND that being said, domesticity is literally where he THRIVES at being a husband

-He's constantly being the perfect example of how to balance work and home life efficiently. You're the most precious thing in his life and that absolutely shines through in the way that he treats you.

-This is a man of compliments and words—but really just enjoys spending quality time with you

-It doesn't matter if you're in the middle of a really good book, he wants to curl up next to you and be with you

-Or if you have a hobby, I think he's the type of person to get himself involved and find a way to participate in your passions with you

-He LOVES cooking, especially old family recipes. There's been many a time when he comes home from a case early and just starts making food because he wants to treat you :)

-Rosie adores discussing domestic details with you and nothing bores him—not the laundry or the dishes, not the house chores or the radio, not the latest neighborhood gossip, and certainly not any talk of future baby Rosenthals

-I don't think he's necessarily big on gift giving, but he will absolutely get you your favorite chocolate

-This man is the best man for dealing with periods and has no shame changing the sheets or taking over for you in house-duties

-Speaking of house duties, everything is done together. He enjoys cleaning and it helps him clear his head, so getting to do it with you?? Even better for him.

-Loves playing music on the radio or on records and dancing with you in the evenings

-Going over to his parents' home for Sunday dinners

-Loves physical affection and always has an arm around you or holding your hand

-Nighttime is such a relaxing time for the two of you; he loves getting to just lay down and cuddle with you or helping each other relax haha

-Rosie muses aloud about future plans, including kids and everything else

-He never brings his work home and when he's home, he's home 100%

-Reading together passages from your favorite books

-LOVES LOVES LOVES taking you to the jazz club and going out for date night

-Loves listening to you ramble and is the embodiment of the heart eyes emoji

-Likes sleeping in with you and having lazy mornings together where limbs are still tangled together and you're both half asleep

-He loves waking up to you still sleeping and absolutely plays with your hair

-Sundays are sacred days and so most of the work is done on Saturdays and he's pretty good about being devoted to you and to God on Sundays

-Forehead kisses is his THING

Some light spice below:

-If you're ever reading and he wants some attention, be prepared for this man to come and lay atop you and start getting a little handsy....but you have to keep reading if you want that sort of attention afterwards

-Loves sharing baths with you and any sort of water fights end in makeout sessions or sex

-This is a hot take, but he doesn't believe that sex is a good or healthy way to makeup after arguments....HOWEVER, soft sex after arguments have been resolved and you're both on good terms? His favorite thing

-Really into sessions where he can figure out how to make you orgasm as many times as possible (and he's creative, so he's going to figure it out haha)

-If you sit on his lap in the evenings, be prepared for his hands to latch onto your waist and to stay there for a while

-Solidly appreciates every part of your body—but especially loves softness and some curves (especially if you're a little self-conscious of them)

-So so so so bad at teasing in public, especially when he sees you with his nieces or nephews

-Has a breeding kink for sure

-Sex at his work

-Sex against the window of the apartment

-Sex in the bathroom of the Jazz Club

-Soft sleepy sex where you're half asleep is definitely a thing (don't worry, he's fine doing most of the work haha)

-Is so vocal and soft with you

-Is VERY demonstrative, Nonny....shows/tells/guides you in a lot of different things to make it the best experience for both of you

[maddie-dog]

"Mama, I'm bored..."

As Mama looked at me with a devious grin, I immediately knew I had spoken the wrong words.

But, could you blame me?

After a half-hour of caregiver-mandated tummy time with nothing but wooden blocks and the feel of my damp diapers to entertain me, I was bored. I had exhausted all the entertainment value that the childish toys held for me.

Although Mama treated me like an overgrown infant, I was an adult, after all. I had adult needs for entertainment.

"You're bored, sweetie?" Mama purred as she approached me, "Are your age appropriate toys not stimulating enough for you?"

I felt a shiver run down my spine as Mama lightly ran her nails down my back. She then placed her lips by my ear.

"Oh, my sweet little toy, you don't even know what boredom is. I think it's time for Mama to teach you."

Days, weeks, maybe even months later, my eyes brightened immediately as I heard the door to my nursery open.

I turned my head to the side in hope of seeing who entered. Turning my head was one of the few movements left to me in my current predicament.

I couldn't help but grin stupidly behind my pacifier gag as I saw Mama's face coming nearer.

After only-Mama-knew-how-long spent gagged, swaddled, and restrained in my crib with only the slow turning of the mobile above my head for entertainment, any change in my environment was cause for joy and excitement.

"There's my smiley little toy!" Mama said as she leaned into my crib and undid my pacifier gag. "Still bored?"

I immediately shook my head from side to side, signaling that I wasn't.

"Good! I was thinking we would try tummy time again today. How does that sound?"

Words spilled out of me and tears formed in my eyes as I pleaded and begged to be allowed to participate in the activity that, not long ago, I had deemed boring and undignified.

"Good toy!* Mama said as she helped me out of the crib and back to the same blanket and blocks I had complained about just prior to my extended isolation.

I happily laid on my stomach, taking in the familiar but also somehow new surroundings and toys with a new found appreciation. I giggled and kicked my feet as I stacked blocks for hours, appreciating the tiny bit of freedom and entertainment I had scoffed at before.

As my carefully stacked block tower collapsed for the hundredth time that day, I knew one thing for certain: I would never complain about being bored to Mama again.

[sol-consort]

How do you think the mass effect depicts would react to trick or treating? (Sorry if it’s been asked before and I missed it)

Halloween Pt.1

[Part 2]

Dw, you're good it's never been asked before. Even then, I don't mind repeating prompts if I had something new to add... Otherwise I just let it marinate in my inbox in shame.

Gonna assume this is about Mass Effect alien species and not specific characters since that's what I'm mostly asked about. If anything, it shows how impressive the world building in the franchise is for the whole foundation of my blog to be set upon mostly just the species content.

Asari

They think it's a little novel of a holiday

Surprisingly down to participate in it, both to "welcome our new human neighbours" and because they're genuinely intrigued

Most asari are hardcore

They take the costume making part of Halloween very seriously

A good handful of them do end up dressing up as Aria

Doesn't end well.

The first year of Halloween to them is a big hit

Becomes a whole trend and the Next Big Thing

Then like all trends, it ends up simmering down with time

A couple decades into the future and only some asari still celebrate Halloween, mostly the ones with human relatives or friends

But a lot of houses, stores, and even offices keep a honorary candy bowl for humans during this time of year

More as an accommodation

Human demand free candy from you during this one day, it's a given fact across the galaxy

And the asari are nothing but courteous and considerate of other species' customs.

The asari only ever hand out asari candy, absolutely refuse buying anything else.

-

Turians

You give the war nerds a chance to dress up as their favourite hero and expect them NOT to jump on it?

They even use real guns and weapons in their costumes

Aren't in it for the candy

Frankly they can't even eat 90% of it, and houses rarely have dextro candy soo...

They're content with being the person with the most badass Halloween costume in the room

Get too into character, however.

Especially the ones cosplaying as a specter

Especially the ones cosplaying as a certian specter Sniper from an infamous Normandy team

Turians think humans have the right idea about Halloween but the wrong execution

Everything is too easy it's...too boring

Where is the pizzazz? Where are the stakes?

The tricks. Oh yes the tricks

Instead of freely offering candy, you must impress the whole turian household first before they deem you fitting of receiving their favour

Sometimes whole competitions are put in place

They like it enough to incorporate an altered version of trick treating into their own holiday calendar

At least the human Halloween parties are fun

Turian houses hand out energy candy bars and dextro candy, which is...poisonous to humans.

-

Angara

So why can't they just give you the candy right away?

Why do you have to wait and dress up?

You can just ask, they'll give you free candy any day :)

Despite their words, they're the most likely species to pick "trick" when approached

They're just curious, they wanna see what trick you have up your sleeves

What do you mean "it's just a saying"

You don't have anything prepared? Then why did you offer in the first place

Now they're just disappointed, human.

They find the holiday a little strange, some are sceptical of how it could be enjoyable, others are very intrigued and excited

Chances are the angara would just observe the humans from afar

At least in the first Halloween year before deciding to take a dip in the pool

Others straight up immediately canonballing into the whole Halloween thing from day one

They end up enjoying it more than they thought. Going door to door and seeing their neighbours, meeting other friendly faces

They still don't see a point for the rehearsed lines, why not just ask directly for candy?

A lot of Angara do actually bother to prepare a trick

Ringing the doorbell to an angaran household, the door opens for you to be greated by one of the mothers looking at you in endearment

She compliments your costume, little nitpicky with the details, but hey, it's her sincere opinions

Lifting your candy bucket up in anticipation

You receive!

Goob

A scoop of yummy angaran goob piped into candy wrappings

As your treat

[mogglewrites]

Headcanons for Brat 🌟🍶🥊🌪

Idk I just wanna think about them being unruly and bratty. Could be OOC but yk what these are just stuff that my brainworms bleghed out of their little mouths.

—🌟Luke🌟—

Luke is a type that is so playful all the time that he just won't follow orders. Like an untrained dog or a puppy. He knows how to be good, but he just wants to play a little more. Nipping and biting. He knows how to use his weight to flop around and be lazy when he's in a selfish mood. Expect to suddenly find yourself crushed under his body when he decides to just lie down on top of you and doesn't get up no matter how you ask him.

He's probably the easiest to convince to do something, but the way he submits/agree to do it is also calculated. Luke knows what kind of image he gives off, and he rarely drops the performance. He doesn't do anything he doesn't want to. And I feel like he'd shut the situation down in a really aggressive–but effective–way. If you try to defy him when he's like that and win? That's because he lets you win.

—🍶Jamie🍶—

Jamie is a more classic type of brat that uses insults as a defense. He shoves you away and lashes out, but it's intentionally not hard enough to hurt. He's just testing your patience and see how far he can rile you up before you snap. It's very much cat-like in the way he lets you approach then rejects you when a stray word upsets him. He'll always be gauging your reactions too.

He wants to be the one controlling the flow of events, and if there's not enough drive from the other person, he doesn't want to waste his time. It's go big or go home. He won't be completely 'tamed', but a strong impression is very important with him. Of course, this also means that if he wants something, he's going to be gunning for it at a 110%. You either learn to handle him or you leave. There is no in-between.

—🥊Ed🥊—

Ed is a risky type. One wrong word or move and he'll buck you off. He knows he can handle himself, but being intentionally vulnerable still puts him on high alert. He hits back and he hits hard, but if you're careful enough, he's easier to handle than Luke, Jamie, or Rashid. I enjoyed the animal image of him being a mouse/rat before, but after M. Bison released in SF6, I felt like the image of a horse suits Ed much more. He's fast and flighty, and hits like a damn truck. If you don't want to get trampled, you need to know how to rein him in.

Don't treat him too harshly because he'll fight you off. Don't treat him too gently because he'll get insulted. Have a firm hand and lead him with confidence. Praise is effective, but too much and he'll catch on that they might be empty words. It's like dealing with a big animal. You cannot back down and but you also can't just use overwhelming force to suppress him.

—🌪Rashid🌪—

Rashid is actually feels like an aloof type to me. He's not dangerous at all and is a bit similar to Luke. However, if it's too boring, he won't try to make his own fun. He'll just stop and leave. Trying to hold him down will result in him flitting away even faster. He really suits the image of a bird. Always flying high and flying free. You can get close to him, but it's not a guarantee that he'll stay with you.

Pampering him doesn't work either because he's already used to it (Azam really raised him too well). So you have to use new and 'fresh' experiences to draw his interest, then he'll be an active participant. He's either into it, or not at all. And if you messed up, he's gone like the wind. Once he's interested though, then you'll get the full brunt of his power. The similarity to Luke appears here again, but unlike Luke who does anything but what you want and doesn't care if you do what he wants or not, Rashid will bug the hell out of you in order to get what he wants. Birds are loud, dude.

[siriusblackdevotee]

Saw ur post abt asshole Sirius and came here to learn lol . Or any interpretation of him u like(plsplsplsps)

Listen, EVERY possible way you can make our Sirius to be THE asshole is a pass for me. Anyway that can be made up, I do not care...that said, here's what I remember immediately.

The whole Severus thing? I like the idea that James only had a childish level of dislike, almost harmless, mostly throwing a disdained look at him and nothing else. But Sirius was very bothered by just the mere existence of Severus, a poor ugly looking kid. He notices James really didn't like him because he hung out with lily. So he's like, "why don't we teach him a lesson?" James is like, "isn't that too far? He didn't do anything that much besides being ugly [Insert other childish reason]", James is really hesitant, he doesn't feel like it's justified. But then Sirius again, is like, "you'd be doing the world a favor, you know Slytherins are bad, not a single one turned out good, he's a future death eater, he's going to kill in the future, he deserves it, you're doing something heroic." And James is convinced, he and Sirius team up and basically corner Severus just to bully him and he's having fun torturing this kid. The whole time he keeps validating James and justifying their actions. Then when the other mauraders join in, he tells peter "but isn't it funny? Didn't he look so funny when he tried to run away? The look of terror was funny! Did you see what he did? What an idiot!" And Peter is easily convinced, this is all just good humor, just jokes between kids. Remus however, is not. The whole time he's guilty, nauseous, because he's conscious enough to know they are definitely not in the right, none of this is justified but Sirius is like "c'mon Remus, don't be sensitive, don't be a loser, oh you're so boring, it's just a little fun, no need to be so serious all the time!" And AND, one time, Sirius stopped mid bullying to beckong Remus over, he's like "here, you try punching him, I promise its so fun, he deserves it, it's okay." And Remus obviously does because Peter and James are waiting for him and this feels like he needs to prove he deserves their friendship so he participates. That one time. That one time, Sirius brings it up EVERY time, he's like "do you feel better than us? You're just as bad. You're part of this, don't try to deny it now" and Remus cannot fight his entire friend group, they're all convinced it's just a fun activity, and he doesn't want to lose them by opposing them so he just shuts up and stays at the back. And also the WHOLE TIME?? Sirius did not give two shits about the whole future death eater thing, he still despises Severus of course, but that's it, it was all fun for him, he just used it as an excuse to have fun freely. Plus James noticed pretty early on that Lily really won't ever look his way unless he stops acting like a little shit so he really wants to put a stop to the group activity but Sirius is like "we have to? We don't have to stop, we can just let everyone think you stopped, we can just hide it instead. Let's stop getting caught shall we?" Hence how James "matured", despite still bullying Severus at the background and Sirius helped hide/joined.

And then wolfstar. I really really love emotionally intelligent Sirius so he noticed quickly that Remus is hella in love with him (and Remus is a...weird masochist cause why would like someone that treats you like that?? But anyways). And he sort of belittles?? it?? Every chance he gets, he uses that fact to have his way with Remus. "I thought you liked me? Prove it. Do that right now and prove it." He does it publicly too. "I dont think Remus would like me doing that, of course not, I'm his favorite, he can never say no to me." Not explicitly saying anything publicly ofc, but enough to sort of make a mockery out of it, again, belittling it. And despite bringing it up every time, he manages to avoid any conversations afterwards, either that or just ignores any moves from Remus and it's not like there's many attempts from Remus, because ..well he has no courage, he has like 0 expections that Sirius will ever like him back so he's fine with having his feelings used for every little thing (it's not). And thennn comes the prank, and ofc he uses Remus's feelings to get out of any consequences. "oh drop it Remus, I know you're not mad at me, you can't be, I'm your favorite, aren't I?" And it's that moment it really solidifies for Remus that Sirius really is an awful person but there's nothing he can do because he still loves him anyways.........but! obv this can be unrequited but the other version is Sirius that finds new joy in making fun of Remus for liking him, constantly does that, but then slowly he's noticing weird things like "ugh he's so messy looking with his untamable brown curls and look at the way he's biting his own how gross and his fingers are so long and funky looking and he really loves chocolate forgs I should get them and oh god uh oh oh fuck shit shit shit" and then goes through three weeks of feelings denials and violently rejecting Remus because he cannot be seriously in love with Remus , the loser, the guy he's been making for of for years so now he's the loser an this is karma...after the three weeks are over he gets his shit together and asks out Remus so everything's okay.

And then Regulus :3. Might wanna skip this one since it's all about him and Sirius. But anyways. Sirius...takes out his anger on Regulus almost every time he interacts with his parents. Literally every interaction, it ends with him feeling frustrated, hurt, humiliated and he just takes it out on Regulus. They fight, it gets physical, they brawl the way only siblings do, like it's violent shit, no holding back any punches. And Sirius is the older brother, he's taller and stronger so regulus loses every single time, and even if he's so obviously defeated, Sirius does not stop until he hears crying, then he stops and by then, bruises and blood are definitely very there. The best part is if you asked Sirius how he felt about Regulus, he'd tell you "nothing" and actually mean it because all Regulus was to him was a punching bag. Maybe they had a good relationship when they were much younger but they drifted apart and now they basically hated the sight of each other. But if you asked Regulus how he felt abt his brother, he told you he despised Sirius. Because Sirius was like, his tormenter ever since he could remember. Also also also! Despite bearing the brunt of their parents' scrutiny, he might also be the favorite because he's the heir, so no matter how objectively in the wrong Sirius is, their parents always dismiss Regulus every time he comes complaining. So again, Sirius gets away with it and because of this very enabling behavior, doesn't even see he's doing anything wrong. And when Sirius runs away, regulus is heir, BLA BLA BLA, he still terrorizes regulus at school, nitpicking every little thing "I hear you didn't get an O in potion, what a fucking idiot, potion?? I can almost hear mum's heart breaking, still shit at casting as ever I see, tell me, has our father said anything?" So this version, regulus might be a blood purist, might be not, but Sirius always saw him weak, lesser, basically had no respect so he never regretted his actions. If Regulus was a blood purist, then if anything, Sirius feels like he deserved what he got even more. This is just one version. Let's move on to popular fanon. Sirius runs away, tried to bring Regulus but he said no because one of them gotta stay. BLA BLA BLA, now regulus survived the water hocruxes thing and finds himself in Sirius' doorstep, begging for help. I forgot how this part goes, but ig he's on the verge of death? Dehydration, clawed deep from the inferis nails? Anyways so he's dying, he's begging for help, he looks pitiful, barely standing as he is but all Sirius does is watch him for 5 seconds, then lean on the doorframe and just says "no" and regulus is so desperate to live rn "wdym no" "I said no, don't you remember? That was the last thing you said to me, maybe it's the last thing I'll say to you, so no." And regulus can't even find himself to be pissed at the audacity because that incident and this are not remotely the same but again, he's tryna live so he started begging, really pathetically begging because Sirius is the only one that can help him. Sirius doesn't respond at all, like it's really solidifying the whole last thing to say is "no" thing, and it's scaring Regulus. But jussttt as he feels like he's about to die, like few seconds away, he feels Sirius heal him. And then he's like "now we're even." This is all bc Sirius's pride was really hurt when not only did regulus say no to him, he had to beg for regulus to come and he still said no. He was humiliated so this was him getting back at regulus. Yes, regulus is forever traumatized, he'll always remember how his brother almost left him to die for something over a years go. And then seeing that effect, Sirius is like "omg, get over it, you didn't even die". So yes, piece of shit older brother Sirius!!

If we're talking about regulus, we gotta talk about Kreacher. Obv their animosity started with Kreacher, who has been saying things he should not be to a kid, but as time goes on, you can barely defend Sirius because of the thing he does. Yes Kreacher started it but there is a very obvious power balance. I believe that yes, the Black family are prideful with their elves but they treat them like slaves, just that no one else is allowed to. So this, + Walburga and orion's enabling behavior + Sirius's hatred for Kreacher+ Kreacher being Regulus's favorite all lead to Sirius straight up torturing Kreacher. Shit the Malfoys did to dobby (I think) or worse. Really worse. And obviously he faces no consequences!! And Kreacher can't even fight back, bc he's a slave, the power imbalance....ofc, Sirius is only this horrible to Kreacher, not elves in general....but also, he could be transferring that hate to other elves? unconsciously? like trauma or smth? Idrk.

I won't explain much for this one, but Sirius definitely did get a lot of punishments for excessive force after fights with death eaters. Yes he's using the whole being death eaters thing to be unnecessarily cruel. Anyone that confronts him for oh idk, did you really have to tear that guys arm? And he's like "wow, are you sympathizing with the death eaters? You one of them? Why don't you joinVoldemort since you care so much?"

I have more of him being...really horrible but I can't remember them all right now. Through all this, James and harry are still the only one he's unconditionally nice to btw. Actually, with the Sirius finds out about Jegulus trope, he definitely can be very mean to James. And, well with harry, he might be a little harsh, but with time, he's incapable of hurting Harry. Ish.

Anyway, if you're still here, ily, thank you for reading this far!! Hope this answers your ask!!

[mad-hatter-memes]

Eddsworld Starters (Goulden Era)

A collection of dialogue prompts from the episodes of the Goulden Era of Eddsworld (2004-2012). From the The Dudette Next Door to Space Face (Part 1). Feel free to edit quotes as necessary.

TW: Swearing

"May I help you with your luggage?"

"YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

"Oh no, we hit that person!"

"Big bloody deal, that person busted our car!"

"Huh...Wonder why all the graves are empty..."

"Let's go looting!~"

"Getting kinda bored there, lying face down in a gutter, festering..."

"No, t-t-that's impossible! You're dead!"

"I'm in your car, [Name]..."

"Help me, or I'll eat your brains."

"[Name], I've come back. Back from the grave!"

"[Name]! Do you HAVE to eat every survivor that comes to us?"

"Three books?! Nobody ever said anything about THREE books!"

"We need to think of a way of opening this gate...I suggest throwing [Name] at it!"

"So [Name], what movie did you get?"

"Hm...Wouldn't it be fun if we could go to hell?"

"So this is hell...What a sight!"

"Hey wait a minute! Why am I on the menu?!"

"Oh my god...Are you alright? You look terrible!"

"Get a haircut...with some highlights."

"I think it's some sort of old Egyptian door..."

"What in the name of this delicious bowl of Eddsworld Cereal happened to my bass?!"

"But there might be treasure down there!"

"For the last time, [Name]. No pirate hats!"

"But I thought the real Santa Claus died centuries ago..."

"You participated in a game of paintball, using REAL guns!"

"This holiday ain't big enough for the two of us..."

"Four viewers?! How did my film only get four viewers?!"

"Dammit, [Name]! You didn't think this one through at all!"

"Oh no! It's a horde of disgusting hideous fish-faced demon spawn!"

"Uh oh! Two [Name]s? I think we know what we have to do..."

"HOW DO YOU MORONS EVEN BREATHE?!"

"Sir! I feel like a shaved bowling ball! Sir!"

"Uh, [Name]...I um...I accidentally flushed the keys down the toilet..."

"Uh...are you sure we couldn't just get a plumber?"

"Who says I'm too old to trick-or-treat? I've only got...twelve restraining orders."

"Hey! Dinner and movie first, buddy!"

"Uh...[Name], why are you biting a pile of garlic?"

"[Name]!, [Name]! [Character Name]'s a vampire!"

"[Name], I just bought a camera, and not just ANY camera, this camera's gonna change our lives forever!"

"You soulless monster! Why are you saying such things!?"

"But—but wouldn't this make some kind of paradox or something?"

"Don't be stupid, that kind of thing only happens in the movies!"

"Oh god, I'm old!"

"No wait! What are you doing with that hammer?!"

"No, [Name]! Put down that drill!"

"Well, if I have to give a bit of constructive criticism, well, it'd probably be that this is the best thing ever created by ANYONE EVER!"

"OK, [Name], I think we get the point! This whole 'I hate Christmas' thing is getting old!"

"Is my face really getting old?"

"CAN'T YOU JUST LEAVE CHRISTMAS ALONE?!"

I know you're not a Christmas fanatic, but you're being problematic and slightly dramatic!"

"You blew up the reindeer! You act like a punk! Every time you get drunk, we put up with this junk!"

"I'm just gonna go back to being dead."

"Augh. He just kept screaming, crying, begging for help, his things breaking, the evil laughter, sobbing, his tv keeps turning on and off, his window opening, and suddenly enigmatic gusts of wind are coming through."

"I'm surprised you found the time in your busy self-worship schedule."

"Ha ha. Yeah. Who are you and what have you done with the real [Name]?"

"I hate you. You threw away my milk!"

"Guys, I think our house might- MIGHT… Be a little possessed. Or nothing. Maybe- maybe it's nothing."

"WHAT?! You're crazy! How could you not like ice cream? Ice cream is delicious!"

"Anyway, as for the ghost thing, That sounds about right. Didn't you get spirit insurance?"

"[Name]! there are aliens that have abducted us and they're probably gonna eat us and I'm too pretty to die!"

"[Name]. Don't you burn that tree down. Do NOT burn that tree down!"

[maryonmega]

Twin Stars - Chapter 17

Stewing (what sense?)

The hiking went pretty run-of-the-mill from then on. Except that, this time, you were the one attached to Stardust's hip. You saw the other three from the original party talk among themselves, and didn't need to hear the words to know. That was fine, you didn't exactly care, either. 

 

The Universe had forced you to follow that whim against your will, but, this time, you'll dare to face it again even if the thought of it penetrating your skin and reminding you that you're it's puppet terrifies you. If Madame already did something with what she sees is another story. You saw that she's not imune to redirection. You just have to up your game untill it becomes a footnote. 

 

Maybe it's because of familiarity mixed with how long ago it has been, but, hiking feels almost like mindless work. It's not suspicious to cling to your sibling after finding out that they hurt himself, and it's not weird that you still dislike how they started treating their body as disposable. Nothing to see here, leave me alone. 

 

It'd be over in a few more days anyway. It was fine. They would have more chances to have long hikes later. Just not in this specific trail. 

 

On the second to last day, when the group knows the trail will be over the next day (and you can't keep blocking your brother-in-law), the Kid Bonnie declares that two campfires will be made and doesn't elaborate. 

 

You help the siblings set up the fires. You make two circles of dirt and smaller rocks - the first time you did that, you had to explain it's getting too cold to put them out at night without waking up with numb fingers and toes, so the circles are to avoid causing a forest fire. Right now, Bonnie deemed your collective work acceptable and shooed you both away so they could do some sort of surprise. You have your doubts about how surprising it will be when the scent becomes notable but respects their wishes nonetheless. 

 

You go back to sharing with Mirabelle that night. The lidded pot stays lidded at night. 

 

The group hangs around for a little more time, and you don't participate. You're too tired. Too sober too, but solving this is not an option. All you can do is get off trail to try and rest. 

 

...

 

Ha, for someone who took going back to climbing trees as a chore, doing it now sure sounds nice. 

 

You pick one. One almost out of leaves that couldn't offer cover from even a breeze, let alone rain is snow. One that you couldn't hide on no matter how hard you try. 

 

It's ok because you're already hidden enough! What better disguise than a metaphorical truth and a quick Change to get rid of physical evidence? 

 

And, if croissants are an evidence, Loop would want to avoid trees like they own one money. Another layer, it seens. 

 

You pat the tree like a friendly stray animal, and climb. 

 

With your hat back at camp, the sun and wind touch your face unrestricted. Like in Bambouche, like-

 

Ow, migraine. 

 

No thinking about where else. 

 

...

 

Why do you feel so tired? You chose this. Wanted, even. Why does climbing down feel like a chore right now?

 

You really can't just enjoy a good thing, can you?

 

Grin and bare with it, Loop Sisyphus. Grin and bare with it. Grin and bare with it. You'll survive. 

 

You climb down, and take a second to remember why you're hatless. Grin, Loop Sisyphus, you still have to finish the trail. 

 

Noon comes soon enough, and the surprise is revealed: stew. You could see it coming, but still makes easier to keep the smile on your face. Bonbon seens entusiastic, it's cute. And, something warm in a cold noon sounds nice. 

 

"Another case of boring but delicious, Boniface?"

 

You hold back a reaction. Something similar happened after the loops? How did Stardust react? You doubt that very strongly, if Odile feels well saying that so casually. 

 

You don't need to do so for much longer. Bonbon gasps at her like it was a personal insult. And, to them, it might as well have been. 

 

"It's not boring! It's a hunter's pot made in camp! It's the opposite of boring!"

 

You blink at Bonbon. 

 

"Hunter's pot?"

 

"Some people call perpetual soup." Nille is the one to answer you this time "It's a type common in inns. When did you even learn that, Bug?"

 

Bonnie smiles in a way that's reminding you of a fish head.

 

"After we left Dormont. Some people are happy to show other ways to stop meat from going bad."

 

You see something flicker on Pétronille's face, but she disguises it too fast for you to actually read. 

 

"Well, you better show me some day, Bug."

 

You see her pat Bonbon's hair, and only after that lunch actually starts.

 

You fill a bowl. 

 

This thing (hunter's pot, hunter's pot, hunter's pot) was made with a lot of care. You can read that so clearly that if this was a play you'd complain of how unsubtle everything is being. 

 

But it's not. It's just Bonbon, wearing their heart on their sleeve as always. Even if not always knowing how to deal with that. 

 

A child's voice echoes through your head. About how they've been thinking so much about what's making them upset they didn't realize others were upset too. 

 

... Hum. 

 

You thought you were over this. 

 

Your heart aches. 

 

Guess not. Guess seeing them as different people wasn't the magical cure you hoped for. 

 

You eat quietly. At least, if you scoop with small enough breaks, nobody expects you to talk. 

 

You remembered a fish head. When you brought the spoon up, something on you almost expected fishy taste. It didn't come, of course. It makes you feel like you might cry nonetheless. It's good, and the sheer care poured on it, on something that you're allowed to partake...

 

Bonbons are so similar, aren't they? Showing care with anything but words. No wonder you Siffrin would have trouble, taking words at face value as you Siffrin does. 

 

You hope to... to... 

 

You hope that your hat and hair are enough to not show your tears. 

 

The sky is darkening when your group reaches the next city. 

[wide-eyedbrowns]

yellowjackets team (alive by season 2) rating and ranking

1. Misty - 9.5/10

i said she was annoying but like i get her now. in both the crash and adult timeline, she has the best story and characterization. maybe because her actresses are so great, but definitely her whole arc is unrivaled.

2. Nat - 9/10

her storylines in both arcs are extremely good. definitely the most important yellowjackets member along with misty, i love their little tandem. i just don't like her purple era but she did find a daughter there!

3. Shauna - 9/10

make up your fucking mind girl! one minute she's against lottie's weird cult shit, the next second she's chasing natalie so she can kill her for food and say the wilderness chose! however her craziness post-birth must be a sort of post natal psychosis. adult shauna makes up like 7 points of the 8.5, she's the better shauna for me because she's a straight up loser with an equally loser husband.

4. Coach Scott - 8/10

high ranking out of pure pity like i am so worried for this man. i hope he's still alive and he's experiencing time-traveling hallucinations or whatever, since time traveling is a pretty big theory. i wish he does survive and all the paul scenes are his present scenes but he's gone off the rocks and thinks he's still in the wilderness. this dude is the only one not extremely or supernatully fucked up bc he didn't participate in the cult thing hopefully. BURN THEM CABINS DOWN BAYBEEE

5. Lottie - 7.5/10

when your schizophrenic dreams are misinterpreted by the rest of the group and you're forced to be the face of cannibalism 😂😂🤣🤣. robbed shauna of her cannibal crown. was just being un-medicated then the rest of the team decided to honor her like a god. there were times were she was annoying but you realize she quite literally has done nothing but every single sidekick of hers decides to speak for her and it just goes wrong every single time.

6. Taissa - 7/10

tie. extremely curious about the bad tai and the man with no eyes, which serves as the only "supernatural" event in the series shown that is not in the wilderness or post-wilderness. it would be fucking crazy if tai was the one who bought "It" in the wilderness instead of it like actually already being there, like maybe that was their home? with all the cult symbols or whatever. sometimes i do just find her boring im sorry, she's just like shauna she's extremely indecisive and it's pissing me off! only 7 bc FREE SIMONE ❤️ joking

8. Travis - 7/10

i pity this man so much but sometimes he's boring and his season 1 arc had me skipping scenes. but his brother went missing, "died", came back, then actually died and then no one said "sorry we had to give up your brother to the wilderness, it was either nat or him and the wilderness chose him! we honestly could've atleast tried in helping him get out of the ice cold water but we were hungy". like can we please give this man a break? i wouldn't be surprised if him and natalie refused to hunt for them, if they're all just going to pick cards and eat each other, why hunt for deer, right?

9. Van - 5/10

i feel like one of the only people with a dislike for van's character like. lottie dickrider, i get you "owe" the wilderness for letting you live like you're obviously the favorite but the way she treats the other yellowjackets pisses me off, especially when she straight up said to travis she wasn't ashamed for sacrificing javi? why is she a stronger indoctrinated christian than lottie? i wish they reveal more about her because to be honest her character's a bit of a blank slate, it would be amazing if they start showing a more deeper relationship between her and whatever's in the wilderness. i feel like, in both the show and the fandom, van doesn't have much to her character without tai. her only storyline without tai is with her mother, which we were shown barely 30 seconds of.

10. Mari - 3/10

i just need her gone

11. girl with the shoulder length hair aka pit girl contender number 56 - 2/10

i remember one line of hers and she was rude to shauna and i just didn't like it

12. lesbian w the cap - 2/10

rude to shauna! dye your hair black and i'll give you a bigger role as possible pit girl number 57

[atlantis-just-drowned]

Sfw alphabet with Duke lover/partner edition?? Like how he would treat his s/o and stuff

SFW alphabet with Duke (Nevermore)

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A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Duke is far from being the most affectionate person you've ever met. However, if he starts to get attached to you, he’ll be a little more considerate. Not that he’s gonna upfront about it – he won’t. But he’ll make sure to check on you a little more often, he’ll care more about your feelings… Generally, he’ll just be less annoyed by your mere existence. And it will be visible, because he won't act the same around you, but don't expect him to be all lovey-dovey.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Spike his curiosity. The man is just like a very tall gremlin: he likes shiny things that attracts attention. Do something unexpected. Stand out of the crowd. Be the one who make people laugh. Just, be remarkable. And maybe then he'll start wanting to participate in your fun schemes and ideas. That's his definition of how friendship works.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Although he doesn't mind physical contact, Duke is usually not the one to initiate it. You want to cuddle with him? Well, that's fine, go ahead. He'll let you wrap your arms around him and rest your head against his chest. For his part, he prefers giving light or friendly touches, like putting an arm around your shoulders, taking your hand to sketch a couple of dance steps, or simply brushing your back or your arm. If you're not the type to ask for cuddles a lot, he'll simply make those light touches from time to time, but not a lot more than that. However if you truly need a hug, you can be sure that he'll know, and he'll make sure you'll receive the biggest, warmest hug you ever had.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Duke is not exactly the domestic type. As an artist in the beginning of the XXth century, he grew used to rely on himself, and on himself only. The idea of living in a home that would belong to the both of you would make him uneasy at first, and he'll avoid the subject for a long time. So at first, for him "settling down" would look more like him spending all of his time at your place and doing the chores. And as time passes, he always seems to be staying longer. But it isn't really like he lives here right? I mean of course he washes his clothes with yours, he cleans and cooks sometimes, and you both eat and sleep together, but it isn't really like you're sharing a house right? He's not even paying the rent or anything, he's just visiting you for a few days! Expect him to think about it for a long time. He won't share his thoughts with you, but he will think about it a lot, until he'll finally connect the dots and ask you if he can just... Move in your house? And honestly you'll probably deadpan at him, considering he was already living almost h24 at your place anyway.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Duke is pretty independent. He doesn't feel like he needs a partner to be complete. Most of the time, he'll ask people out because they sparked his interest briefly, but once the dopamine disappeared and he starts getting bored, he really struggles to maintain a meaningful connection. So he'll look pretty detached, almost cold, while breaking up with an ex. They either bored him, or frantically annoyed him by not going along with his little mischievous plans. He doesn't like being held back and feel restricted.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Once he finally accepted to officially lives with you, committing is not that much of a problem. To Duke, it's practically the same thing anyway, except you'll both have some more jewelry, and he'll get a new occasion to blow your mind with some impressive demonstration of love. But he will do his best to make sure you feel loved and appreciated for who you are. What can I say? He's a bit of a romantic at heart.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Duke is not fundamentally mean, it's just that he can be... A bit insensitive at times. He doesn't mean it of course, but it can happens for him to do a joke that he intended to be fun for you, but might hurt your feelings a bit. It's really not bad intentioned tho, and obviously he will immediately say sorry if you tell him it was hurtful. But yeah, emotionally, he can be pretty challenging from time to time. Same physically: he can hugs you or wraps his arms around you a little too tight if he gets carried away, but it's never too harsh and if anything, it's definitely a proof that he cares about you.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

As I said before, Duke is not the most touchy-feely in the whole crew. But he can have his moments, when he's feeling particularly joyful. Sometimes he'll simply get carried away and lift you up in a tight hug, making you turn around until you can't help but giggle at his behavior. Other than that, he will definitely tease you when he feels flirty, by wrapping his arms around your waist from behind and whispering some joke to make you blush.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It's pretty easy to catch Duke's attention. The most challenging part is to keep it. And I think he knows that himself, so of course he'll take his time to say the L-word. He just wants to know if you'll last longer than the others before making any statement about his own feelings. After all, maybe you're just some kind of new shiny trinket that he'll get bored of ? But once he realized that you were sticking in his mind longer than usual, he'll panic first, than he'll accept it, and only after that, he'll say it.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Duke is not really upfront about his jealousy: he trusts you and he knows that he's definitely taking all of the place you have in your heart, because you can be sure that he's constantly making sure to occupy your mind. He'll just get more judgmental, cold and defensive toward the person he's jealous of, if they take too much of your time or try to flirt with you. If anything, he'll probably make some very sarcastic comments toward this person. He really wants them to understand that he is the boyfriend, and nobody else will.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

The man definitely enjoys kissing your cheeks, your forehead and your chin. He keeps more romantic kisses for when you two are alone together and he can really get the time to be with you, without being constantly distracted. The way he kisses you also depends of his mood. Sometimes he'll give you endeared, affectionate kisses. And sometimes, he'll tease you by giving very light, yet very flirty little kisses everywhere on your face, just to see you blushing and smiling like an idiot. He likes to see the way you react to his teasing.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

When you two first started to know each others, you were honestly terrified to the idea of every leaving Duke alone with a kid. But life never really goes as planned, and you ended up discovering that he was surprisingly a good caretaker. Not the best in the whole world, but he was better than what you had pictured: he's able to distract kids and keep them entertained with jests and magic tricks, and his mischief seems to really please them. They like his fun and light demeanor, and he likes being the attention's center.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Duke has a very well-oiled morning routine. He likes to take care of himself when he wakes up, I mean he's a magician, an escape artist, he needs to stay healthy for his tricks, doesn't he? It was kinda unexpected for you to see him doing warm-ups just after going out of bed, but eventually, you ended up getting used to it. You eventually get absolutely unbothered about it, going out of bed and preparing breakfast while you wait for him to join you after his exercises.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

The more energy Duke spends through the day, the faster he'll stop teasing you in the night before going to bed. Because no: you are not safe from his teasing, even after a whole day of activities. If his day was boring, prepare. You'll have to deal with all energy remaining that he didn't use. He'll tease you, tickle you, flirt with you to an indecent amount. You just won't get rid of him until he finally decides to sleep. On the contrary, if his day was exhausting, you'll ultimately experience peace, because he'll straight up fall onto his mattress and fall asleep faster than anyone else.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Duke is not particularly focused on the past. He'll make efforts to talk about it more once you get to know each others and start getting more intimate, but really, he doesn't see the importance of talking about his past life. That is, unless you talk about his stage performances. It's pretty much the part he talks about the most, he loves to tell the tales of his incredible success, probably exaggerating it a bit in the process, but it's really light-hearted. So he's pretty opened, you just have to ask questions because he won't bring the topic on the table. The only thing he will never share about himself is how he does his tricks. A good magician never reveals his secrets!

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Surprisingly, Duke is not as hot-tempered as he can look from the outside. Sure, he can be quite intense to deal with, but he also knows very well how to keep his own emotions in check, and stay calm and collected no matter what. If someone try to anger him, the best reaction they will get out of him will probably be light annoyance. He'll only express his anger if he trusts you: he doesn't want anyone and everyone to know when and how he feels impacted by something.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Duke doesn't exactly have the biggest attention span you've ever seen. Expect him to forget stuffs, even stuffs about you. He doesn't do it on purpose, it's just... sometimes you say something about you, and the second after, the information have disappeared from his brain. He'll definitely try his best to take note of the most important things (and despite some fails, he successes for the biggest part!), but when it comes to tiny, little details, you'll have to repeat about them a few times before he registers the information.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Schemes. Mischievous plans. Wrongdoings flawlessly executed. You probably stole food from the kitchens. Or broke in some students' bedrooms. Yeah, the longer this relationship goes, the more the two of you achieve unharmful, yet still prohibited deeds. Duke can't help but love this feeling of having you by his side in his fun schemes. If his plan makes you smile or laugh, he'll straight up ascend. Once you started to get involved in his life, making you glad with his adventures became a new sort of goal for him to achieve. A success is never really a success if you didn't find the trip fun. He can't help but love the rush of adrenaline he gets when committing his little deeds with you, and seeing you entertained by them make his heart ache with affection. If you looked very, very closely, you could even see him blush a tiny bit from it. He loves having you as his partner... in crime.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Oh wow now. Are we seriously talking about this? Duke can't even keep up with his own safety. This man has very little to no self-preservation. Of course the idea of seeing you in pain or seriously injured concerns him. But also... He's very bad at stopping it from happening. He does his best by staying by your side, and occasionally stopping you from doing something extremely stupid, but most of the time his definition of protection is to keep bad people away from you by giving them death stares whenever he gets the occasion. He doesn't want to limit your freedom, even if sometimes your ideas can be a bit risky. But without stakes, where is the fun, right ? That's also because he deeply cares about his own freedom, and can't stand people trying to rip it away from him. Don't try to protect him by stopping him from doing what he wants: he'll absolutely hate it. Instead, try to expose logical arguments on Why This Is A Bad Idea. And stay by his side, support him when he needs it. Make him feel like he can rely on you. That's all he needs.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Duke is the walking definition of "living for the cameras". He loves making his tiniest move extra-dramatic, just to entertain himself and his friends. So you can be absolutely certain that he will try to impress you every chance he gets. There were occurrences of him over-doing it, even. Dates dusted with so much sparkles that it almost hurt your eyes. But it's always well-intentioned: he really wants to let you know how madly he's in love with you. In the same time, if Duke puts a lot of efforts in special occasions, he tends to forget a lot about everyday tasks, and gets distracted easily. So, you have to remind him about those a good couple of times. But he really tries his best.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

It is not a secret to anyone that Duke likes to try new experiences. Some of them are funny. Some of them are dumb. Some of them are... weird. Really weird. They can involve tasting terrible food, going to odd places, touching ominous things... Basically, anything that looks uncanny and a bit mysterious. In the best cases, it often turns out gross. The food is probably the worst part.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

When you're a performer, the way you present yourself is a key point. This also applies to Duke. This man can't stand the idea of not looking eye-catching at all time of the day and night. If he appreciates you and you show him that he can trust you on being honest about his looks, he'll ask for your opinion absolutely every morning, to know if the way he's presenting is great. Please compliment him. Tell him he's shining bright like a star. His heart will probably skip a beat if you tell him that.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Once again, Duke is extremely independent. He doesn't feel like he needs anyone to feel complete. It does bring something more to his life, something he loves to experience everyday with you, but he wouldn't feel incomplete. More like bored, probably. You're so much fun to be around, and you always make his heart beat a little faster, it's entertaining. Without you, things aren't missing, but they definitely seem more flat.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

If someone introduced you to the Misfits, it would probably be Duke. He saw you going around and you caught his attention? He'll straight up come to you the first chance he gets, and then present you to his friends. He can't help it: he just wants to show them the cool new human being he found in the wild.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

As I said before, Duke doesn't like anyone (or anything) that restricts his freedom. If a rule sounds dumb to him, he'll disobey. If someone tries to stop him from doing something without an explicit and logical reason, he'll try to do it even harder. More generally, people who seem boring or "don't know how to have fun" (comprehend: aren't getting themselves in trouble all the time just for the sake of attention) are annoying to him.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Duke. Can't. Sleep. If he doesn't pass out from exhaustion. The amount of energy in his body on a daily basis should be illegal. He won't stop annoying you and running around until all of his energy have be spent somewhere. Expect him to keep you awake at night. You can try to force him to sleep: it won't work.