#and if i lose it my mental is gonna go down the drain
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
#wendell#fortnite#so i just found out that my mom cooked smth delicious at home#and only now she decides to cook one#she didnt cook anything while i was staying there when this stupid house that i dont even own is being fixed#she specifically wait for me until this house is “done” aka has a bed even though theres still no clean water or fixed fences#and once im gone she goes back to cooking good food again#and she expects to be normal about this? to not get mad??? after all of my emergency money used up to fix someone else's house?????#i cant believe she expect me to respect or love any of them with this kind of treatment#i wanna cut off them so bad too bad im traumatized and my whole life ive only been striving for their attention and praises#and if i lose it my mental is gonna go down the drain#i hate this so much#how dare she says that she treat all of her children equal#when she only sing praises to my sibling for being able to achieve the assigned goal they made for him#and for my other sibling who now has 2 grand children#they think they didnt know they never talk about me to other people because im the shame of the family#while keep asking me money and making me pay for my brothers family needs#even though they all make the same or even more than me#i hate it#is it because im gay? or what?#like im still your son goddammit that is not ok#fuckkkkk
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
Treat (Kim Mingyu) ୧ ‧₊˚ 🍰 ⋅ ☆
“So Y/n, I see you noticed the cute baker in the kitchen. Any plans on getting to know him?” °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・
Genre: Fluff
AU: University!au
Pairing: Culinary Student!Baker!Mingyu x Medical Student!reader
Warnings: None just tooth-rotting fluff
Synopsis: An average medical student getting by who meets the cute baker from the small bakery across the street in front of her university.
Note: This used to be a TXT fic but I edited it and now it’s a Mingyu fic because I have a bunch of wips that I’m dying to finish. Here’s something for me to post at least, happy reading! As always, don’t forget to like + reblog as a way to support.
WC: 5.4k
Being a medical student was a pain in the ass and was way worse than how people would describe it, it cost money, time as well as your mental and emotional stability. It’s not like anyone would want to study the anatomy of a human in a dull lecture hall with like forty other people, or know how a whiff of a cigarette could even kill you.
Yet here you were, already going the works of med school, and there was no turning back from it all, because although you were passionate, you still had a limit to how much you could take, even if you had always dreamed of becoming a pediatrician to keep you motivated.
“Oh my God Jihyo, I don’t think I’m ready to take this exam. I’m probably going to flunk this semester and I’ll be stuck as a receptionist in scrubs at a local clinic if I don’t get my head straight” you say tearfully.
Your friend Jihyo chuckled as she patted your back comfortingly, assuring you that you would do just fine and that you had already done enough studying the past few days. You weren’t stupid, just dramatic.
“You’ll be fine Y/n, don’t worry about it otherwise you will start to feel even worse. You’ve studied like crazy so it would be insane if you didn’t do so well, like you always do” she smiled softly in reply.
You shoot Jihyo a weak smile back and sigh once again, at least one of your best friends kept you somewhat sane, you couldn’t say the same for your appearance though. With heavy eyebags and eyes that looked as hollow as your soul, anyone would probably mistake you for a psych ward patient if you were caught walking around by yourself.
“Thanks, and good luck to us once we step into the exam hall. We’re gonna need it, me especially” you sigh after gathering the rest of the materials you’ll need for the exam itself.
When an hour passed, the exam completely drained you of all the life you had left. You stepped out of the exam hall with Jihyo groggily. You just wanted to go home and sleep all your problems away, but if you were already struggling as a freshman, how much more would you be in the future knowing you still had thirteen more years to go?
“Is it too late to change careers and become a full-time sugar baby or stripper?” You ask your friend and roommate, Rosé, who was just as drained as you were.
“I don’t think so. Let’s go on that sugar baby website” she chimed back in exhaustion. Chungha laughed at you both on the couch before setting down a pizza on the coffee table in front of you, along with a few drinks and a huge bottle of coke.
“Cheer up ladies, we’ll get through all of this before you know it. Now eat up, the food’s getting cold” Chungha hissed.
You and Rosé helped yourselves without another word, the three of you scarfing down all the food and complaining about midterms just to get your system going.
In the middle of the conversation, Rosé had suddenly brought up the bakery that just opened across the university.
“By the way, a new bakery opened up across the street from our school, do you guys wanna try and visit tomorrow?” She chirped.
You guys didn’t have anything to lose, so you and Chungha agreed before setting a certain time to meet after your last exam. That was when you realized it was getting late so you all cleaned up and started to get ready for bed.
“Goodnight you two! Good luck as well, we’ll need it for our last set of exams” You bid your roommates goodnight as you retreat into your room.
“Whew! That was exhausting, I’m glad everything is over with because chemistry should be the least of my problems for now” you cheered.
Rosé groans and runs a hand through her hair in frustration. Chungha was late, and it was because her boyfriend Jungkook wanted some alone time with her.
“God if Chungha doesn’t come in like five minutes I’m gonna assume they need their ‘THEM’ time” she huffs. You laugh and just grab Rosé while giving Jihyo a call. If Chungha getting it, at least someone else can take her place, for now, her boyfriend probably needs a lot of relief.
“Jihyo can come, she’ll be there in like ten. For now, we should order in advance” you say, as you both enter the bakery.
The interior was very cute and minimal, everything was white marble, be it the racks and tables with checkered flooring. On the ceiling hung two crystal chandeliers that reflected light causing a blur of rainbows to scatter across the room.
“Wow you were right, this place is adorable Rosie! Let’s go order drinks and pick our bread” you squeal and drag her over.
Behind the register, you see a guy with black hair and another guy with light brown hair bickering about something.
“Jeonghan, I swear to fucking God if you—“ the black-haired male was cut off after seeing you and Rosé walking over.
“Go serve the customers first, I’ll be waiting in the back” The brunette smirked, and retreated into the kitchen behind the counter.
At the counter, the guy greets you with a charming smile, just about charming enough to get you flustered, but you didn’t want to look like a mess right now so you browsed the menu behind him.
“Hi! Welcome to Carat Cravings! What can I get you two today?” You read his nametag and saw that he was named Seungcheol. ‘Cute’ you say to yourself and smile back at him.
“Can we get one fruit and egg tart with a margarita pizza for here, please? And for the drinks one caramel macchiato and one americano, both iced with a fruit ade please” Seungcheol punches your orders into the register and looks up at you both again.
“Will that be all?” He asks, and you nod as you hand him your card. Rosé looked at you almost frazzled and was about to refuse your offer to pay, but then noticed that you had caught wind of another guy from behind in the kitchen.
As Seungcheol hands you your card back, you and Rosé make your way to a table near the window. “So Y/n, I see you noticed the cute baker in the kitchen. Any plans on getting to know him?” She giggled softly.
You looked at her with a glare and shook your head furiously. No, you weren’t the kind of person to date because you always prioritized your studies more than anything, but you had to admit, the baker was just so cute.
He was tall and had beautiful sunkissed skin with jet black hair and had a face that almost resembled a puppy, and maybe you also couldn’t help but notice that he had nice hands that kneaded the dough so well. You’d imagine what his hands would do if they were—
“Y/n! Hi Rosie!” Your thoughts were cut short as Jihyo entered the bakery and called over to you both excitedly. She was beaming as you made space for her to sit beside you.
“Hi Jihyo, you look happy for someone who came out of our hour-long exam” Rosé eyed her suspiciously. Jihyo only laughed and waved off what she said while staring both of you down.
“My sister called right after and said the hospital she’s working at is accepting part-timers! I just came here feeling happy about it” she says excitedly.
You and Rosé were shocked but also happy for her knowing that having a sister who worked at a hospital had its perks too. Jihyo was just one of the lucky ones, but everyone starts somewhere.
“Sorry to interrupt ladies but here are your orders! If you need anything else you can just call for me or the other guy behind the counter, the one with light brown hair” Seungcheol placed your orders on the table and the three of you thanked him politely.
When Seungcheol had finally walked out of earshot, Jihyo had lowered her voice into a whisper. “This bakery is cute but oh my god, I never expected the workers to be cute as well,” she says in a giddy tone.
You laugh at her and take a piece of the pizza while sipping on your caramel macchiato, Jihyo still ogling at Seungcheol as Rosé gives her a disgusted look.
“Come on you two, what happened to putting our studies first? If you date during your freshman year you are going to end up as a receptionist in scrubs you hear me” Rosé says sarcastically, but you were too busy staring at the baker who just came out of the kitchen.
He was talking to the two other males behind the counter and sighed. That was when you noticed that he had eyed you up and down too before looking away.
“Y/n? Hello? What the fuck, oh wait it’s that baker” Rosé says with a huff. Jihyo giggles and shushes her, noticing how flustered you became all of a sudden.
The two knew you were never one to talk about guys or wanted to date since high school, so seeing you all worked up over someone you didn’t know would only make teasing you even worse.
“New motivation to go to class every day? I know you have evening classes, so maybe I could ask them what time they close” Jihyo says with a smirk.
“Oh shut up, the baker is just some stupid eye candy you know. I can’t let that go to waste” you try to brush it off, but in reality, you two were practically checking each other out without your friends noticing.
On the other hand, Mingyu also seems to have noticed you and how you stared at him from across the room. Opting to check you out too because you didn’t look that bad either, and because he needed a break from being in the kitchen since the morning.
“Mingyu? Are you alright? Don’t tell me you’re checking out that girl over there with her friends, I was planning to get first dibs because she looked the most interesting” Jeonghan whined.
Seungcheol smacked him on the back of his head and went to tidy whatever was on the counter until a few more customers came in, but then he turned towards the two.
“I mean, you’re not wrong. She looks really pretty, but Mingyu seems to put her on edge. They barely even know each other, but you can feel the tension between them, just go talk to her Gyu” the older male grins.
Mingyu rolls his eyes at the two and notices that Jun has also come out from the back to get a breather. Business was a bit slow today, but they did just open so there was no harm in being a bit laid back.
“Are you guys talking about the group of girls over there? We just opened and you’re already ogling at our customers, be more professional” Jun says nonchalantly.
“Well I need a girlfriend, the girls in my major aren’t all that so ogling at the bakery respectfully would seem better than asking out a girl who wouldn’t know how to interact with me” Jeonghan rolls his eyes and drags Jun back to the kitchen where he’ll be taking over for Mingyu, whilst Wonwoo takes his place at the front.
In the midst of this all happening, you notice the other boys by the counter and rip your eyes off Mingyu to focus on what Jihyo and Rosé are talking about.
“The food is so good here! I can’t believe they just opened, I want to gatekeep this place forever” Jihyo gushed. Rosé nodded in agreement and turned to you, to which you replied with a confused expression.
“Well, we are done. How about we head home so we have more time to relax? I’m sorry if I’m rushing, but I have a show to catch up on” Rosé blabbered. You laugh at her and nod as you all collect your things.
“See you tomorrow Jihyo! I’ll call you” You smile and wave as the three of you part ways, you and Rosé going home together since you were both roommates.
“Alright! Stay safe you two!” Jihyo then turned and walked towards her apartment, which was about two blocks from the bakery itself.
At home, as you’re studying on the living room floor, you notice Chungha sitting on the couch behind you. “I heard from Rosie that the pastry maker from the new bakery caught your eye” she joked.
You roll your eyes and shake your head at the accusation, is it not normal to ogle at people once in a while? And how did word travel so fast?
“Trust me, he’s just eye candy. It’s nothing personal” you sigh, whilst highlighting a sentence in your book. Chungha huffs and takes a sip from her mug, smirking at you.
“I doubt it, you’re such a nerd Y/n. You already work your ass off at school so why not live a little and date? Come on, this guy is probably just as studious as you are, considering he works at a bakery with his friends” she says matter-of-factly.
“So working at a bakery that he started with his friends makes him a nerd like me? I’m so impressed Chungha, you should’ve taken criminology, to be completely honest,” you reply sarcastically, which earned you a slap on the back of the head.
“Come on, if you’re going by tomorrow at least talk to him. I mean, what do you have to lose? You’re smart, pretty and you’re kind. Not to mention, wasn’t he also checking you out?” You felt your face grow hot, guess you weren’t that slick after all if Rosé noticed it too.
Before you could retaliate, the two of you heard the soft pattering of feet and a laugh coming from the hallway. It was Rosé, and it seemed like she’d overheard your conversation through the paper-thin walls of the apartment.
“Y/n! You should go see him! It’ll do you good I promise” she squealed. Chungha laughed and nodded along with her, it seemed like your roommates were some of the most insufferable people in the entire world.
“If I do it will you guys finally leave me alone?” You say weakly. The other two nodded eagerly with wide eyes and you mentally facepalm.
If a simple conversation was gonna get them off your tail, then so be it. It’ll be quick and it’s not like it’ll be a routine part of your day.
The next morning, you couldn’t be any more wrong. You woke up earlier than you should’ve for your first class of the day, and as you fixed yourself in the mirror, you thought about the baker and why you ended up just mentally thanking your friends for the challenge.
“Good morning Y/n, you seem chipper this morning” Rosé greets you from the kitchen. You smile shyly at her and look away, which gives off the impression that you maybe were anticipating the morning more than you thought, compared to the night before.
“Looking forward to talking to him now? Seems like a culinary major so maybe you’ll find him easier than you’d think” she continues.
“Yeah, yeah maybe I am a bit excited since he is cute. I bet he has a girlfriend though and I’ll prove you guys wrong, maybe his eyes just wandered” you laugh while Rosé only gives you a smirk and a scoff.
“When you start dating this guy, I bet you’ll thank us for setting you up like this. Studies can always come second, and who said you can’t multitask?” you bid your goodbye and race to the elevator of your apartment building, sighing from the intense teasing, but before the elevator doors could close, a voice had called over from the end of the hallway.
“Hey! Wait up!” You quickly press the open door button and lo and behold, there stood the exact baker you and Rosé were just talking about this morning, except he was in a chef outfit. ‘Maybe she was right’ you chuckle.
“Thanks for that— Wait, you were with your friends at the bakery yesterday” The tall male recognized you as you nodded back and gave him a friendly smile.
“I’m surprised you even remember me, but I’m even more shocked that you live in the same apartment building” you reply with a laugh. Mingyu scratches the back of his neck awkwardly and nods.
“You guys were one of our first customers, so it’s honestly hard to forget since it’s kind of special in a way” The elevator doors open and the two of you walk out, still engaged in a conversation.
“Oh before we do part ways, I’m Y/n! I had plans to head to the bakery later but it seems like your shift won’t start ‘till the afternoon it seems” you say cheekily.
“I’m Mingyu, it’s nice to meet you. Don’t worry, I only have one morning class before the others take over for the night, so you will be seeing me right after” Mingyu chuckles. Your face heats up so you immediately bid the male goodbye and walk over to your bus.
Microbiology was probably one of the worst classes to ever have in the morning, so a coffee fix for the rest of the day was just what you needed. You offer to buy your other friend Nayeon one too since you needed someone to go with you, just to lessen the effects of being around Mingyu at least.
“I’m starting to get sick of studying fungi and bacteria all day, can you believe every fucking surface we wipe a swab on has some form of disease” you grimace.
The bell of the bakery chimes and you already see a familiar head of brown hair behind the register. “Hi welcome to Carat Cravings! What can I get you guys today?” It was still fairly early in the morning, so you guessed that the ones working the morning hours mostly had evening classes just like you.
“One americano and one caramel machiatto, both iced. While we’ll get a breakfast platter please” Jeonghan punches in the order and you hand him your card, once again, to pay. At that exact moment, Mingyu had come out of the kitchen to greet you.
“Wait you know her?” Jeonghan suddenly asks. Mingyu nods and you greet him back shyly, you two had only just met by chance at the elevator of your apartment building.
“She lives in the same building, anyways Y/n this is Jeonghan. Since you’ll be coming here more often, I assume, then you should get to know us” he grins back at you. Jeonghan gave you both puzzled looks but you nodded in reply, a grin also plastered onto your face.
“Go ahead and find a seat then, your orders will be out in a few” You and Nayeon make your way to a window seat in the corner and take out a few of your notebooks just to go over what was discussed in your lecture.
You are writing down another important note on your iPad when you hear the clinking of glasses and see another blonde beside your table, you guessed this was the other guy named Jun.
“Here you are, let us know how you feel about the food before you go by the way! Also here’s something from Mingyu that he wanted me to give you” he handed you a note and you looked at him confused, then looked over at the counter where you noticed the man as he ran back into the kitchen.
Jun walks away as you open the note, your friend Nayeon is confused as as you are. “Oh—? It’s his uh number?” You say in a flustered manner. ‘Let’s get closer! Here’s my number since I’m too shy to give it to you :)’ it said.
“Aww! Y/n that’s so cute!” Nayeon squeals as you look away shyly to bring out your phone to type in his number. “Hey, he’s just being friendly don’t be like that!” You deny it, but Nayeon wouldn’t let up.
After that day, Mingyu had pretty much become a routine part of your life, except that one phone call after a few weeks of talking to each other.
“Y/n? I didn’t expect you today since you seemed so busy, how was class?” Mingyu chuckles from the other line. You smile at his words before replying, no matter how busy, Mingyu always manages to ask you about your day.
“Well it was pretty ok I guess, I’m just sad I couldn’t stop by the bakery today because it rained too” you reply sadly. You hear the line go silent and hear a few muffled jeers and laughs in the background. ‘Cute’ you thought.
“Don’t mind the guys. Since you called, I wanted to know if you were free this weekend? Jun’s taking over for me” Mingyu asks.
“I am actually! I don’t have anything planned right now. What do you have in mind?” You reply a little too enthusiastically. You hear another chuckle on the other line and cover your mouth in embarrassment.
“You’re so cute, let’s go to a café! I don’t want us to feel so lost since it’s our first time hanging out personally” Mingyu smiled on the other line before hearing Wonwoo gag from behind him. You blush at Mingyu’s comment and try to contain the urge to scream.
“Alright then, text me the time and I’ll put it into my schedule for the week. Bye, Mingyu! Good luck at work!” The other members all smirked at Mingyu and he bid you goodbye as well, this time with reddened ears.
The taller male then turns to his friends who go back to cleaning up before they close the bakery soon. “Yeah, it’s nothing. I just made a friend I swear, besides, she lives in our apartment building so it’ll be weird if I didn’t at least make acquaintances with her” he tries to convince them.
“Yeah right, I’d ask my cute neighbor out on a date if I were you too. Cut the bullshit Gyu, we know you like her” Wonwoo says while laughing.
Mingyu looks away, they definitely weren’t wrong and even though he did have dreams of becoming a top pastry chef one day, he also couldn’t risk not seeing you again.
“It’s always studies first, but I overheard she’s also one of the top students in her major. You bagged the beauty and brains Gyu!” Seungcheol exclaims.
Jeonghan looks at his friend in confusion as to how he even knew this information, but the older only chuckles in response.
“I got this information from Jihoon just so you know, he’s pretty close to her other friend Jihyo I think” Seungcheol concludes. Mingyu sighed and went to fix the pastry display, he was in for a rough week he supposed.
On your end, your two roommates had also overheard the conversation and squealed just as you ended the call. “He asked you out on a date?! Y/n that’s wonderful!” Rosé screams, immediately engulfing you in a bear hug.
“Guys it’s just a regular hang out between friends! He’s just our, cute, neighbor and baker you know” you stifle out. Chungha gives you a look of disapproval and flicks your forehead.
“Yeah, yeah. We all know you two are whipped for each other and it’s been two weeks since they opened up, you two will probably make it official before you even start the second date!” She huffs out. You frown, were you really in denial? You wouldn’t know for sure.
The date (if you could even call it that), came by faster than you could blink and now here you were, standing in front of the mirror, with your makeup done and in a pretty white dress with matching white ballet flats.
“Why do you look so dolled up? It’s a friendly date isn’t it” Rosé teases. You turn to her and see her leaning against the doorframe, a soft smile on her face.
“I just wanted to look presentable you know” you squeak out, knowing you were caught red-handed. It was autumn so you had to take your last chance to at least wear something pretty before layering everything.
“Anyways, tell me the details once you’re back! And take A LOT, and I mean a lot, of pictures with him ok? You two look cute together” Rosé runs away before you can reprimand her, and you suddenly hear your phone ping.
“Y/n! Someone’s at the door for you!” Chungha calls out lovingly. You stiffen, was it necessary for your roommate to act embarrassing at the most inconvenient time? You walk out of your room and make eye contact with Mingyu from the hallway.
Mingyu’s eyes widen at your form, the two of you were wearing matching outfits, both white and looking like you had dressed for the spring instead of the cold autumn weather.
“So?—“ Chungha was cut short as you sprinted and grabbed Mingyu’s hand, leading him down the hallway hurriedly with a laugh.
“I’m sorry, my roommates can be a handful sometimes. Now, where are we going?” You grin. Mingyu’s ears redden after realizing your hands were still intertwined, but you didn’t seem that bothered so he led you to his car that was parked in the basement.
“Are you planning to kill me?” You joke. Mingyu shakes his head and you laugh. “No, no! Just taking you to my car since the café is in the uptown part of the city. It’s a bit far but I guarantee you’ll like it” he replies in a flustered voice.
“Are you sure you’re not some murderer plotting my demise and you’re secretly taking me to your getaway house with your actual girlfriend” you blurt out. He looks at you in confusion and now it was his turn to laugh.
“I don’t think I’d be here then if I had a girlfriend, trust me, I’m more into my studies and passion than you think. So, consider yourself a special girl” Mingyu unintentionally flirts. You hit his shoulder out of habit, but he didn’t seem to mind either as he continued to laugh at you.
“Why’d you ask me out anyway? My other friends are way prettier and way more interesting than me, and don’t think I’m saying that out of pity, I’m just confused since I’ve always had my head buried in books as well” you admit shamefully.
“In all honesty, I just felt an instant connection with you, call it whatever but I’ve never felt like this with someone before” The street lights illuminate his face and you thank the gods above that he can’t see your flushed face in the dimness of the light.
“Oh, we’re here by the way. Let me park and don’t get out until I open the door for you” Mingyu parks the car at a spot in front of a very comfy but also expensive-looking café, before getting out of the driver’s seat to open your end.
You get out and thank him bashfully, the two of you heading inside. It didn’t seem too crowded for a weekend, which relieved you a bit since the ambiance was much more peaceful this way.
“Good afternoon! Welcome to Nabi’s, what can I get you two today?” The cashier smiles. You turn to Mingyu, and he looks at you with another grin, immediately ordering since you aren’t all that familiar with the place.
The cashier punches it in and Mingyu pays for everything, leaving you flustered for the umpteenth time that day. ‘What a gentleman, and he doesn’t have a girlfriend?’ You tell yourself.
“Your orders will be out shortly, you can take a seat and we’ll bring it right over. Have a good one, and here’s your change sir” Mingyu gladly takes his card and leads you to the second floor of the café.
Upon stepping into the seating area, you were immediately greeted with a beautiful view of the city. “Mingyu this is amazing!” You run over to the seat next to the window, and this causes Mingyu’s heart to race. How could you be so endearing even in the smallest aspect?
“It’s nothing, it’s a place I like to go to when I want to be alone, but I brought you here because it’s special to me” he admits while sitting down in front of you.
“Thank you honestly, I feel very special now that I’ve earned enough trust from Kim Mingyu to be able to go to one of his favorite places” You giggle, your stomach full of butterflies from how he treated you.
“Well, I did want to say this and I’m afraid it might be too early, but here it goes” You look at him curiously and stay quiet so you can listen to him better. You were always one to make anyone feel heard and comfortable.
“I like you Y/n, as if it isn’t obvious enough. The day I saw you with your friends at the bakery, something just stood out to me about you, and after getting to know you, it made you a hundred times more attractive to me. It might be a bit early but I wanted to let you know that I’d be willing to wait for you as long as you let me” Mingyu says wholeheartedly.
You were shocked, you liked Mingyu just as much as he did you, but his confession and sincerity were so out of the blue. Was this guy sure about not having a girlfriend?
“Mingyu, I don’t know what to say. I like you too! At first, I was pretty in denial about my feelings since I didn’t want to end up as a receptionist in scrubs and only really stuck to my studies, but you opened up my heart in a way. No need to wait, I’m willing to be your girlfriend” you confess as well.
You stare at Mingyu and notice his ears turn red while a huge smile starts to make its way onto his face. “You don’t understand how happy you make me Y/n, I won’t disappoint you” he holds your hand from across the table.
The rest of the day went by in a blur, Mingyu and you talking for hours on end about everything you missed out on during the first few weeks of getting to know each other, what you guys had in common, and even planning out the second date.
Mingyu and you walk through the basement of your apartment together as he takes you home for the night, dreamy smiles on both your faces and hands intertwined with each other’s. It felt magical almost that you’d even met this guy, he came straight out of a storybook.
“I had so much fun today, thank you Mingyu. I’m so happy,” you say in the elevator. Mingyu engulfs you in a hug and nuzzles his face against the crown of your head, you two did seem like a lovesick couple already.
“Thank you for today as well Y/n, I couldn’t have asked for anything better. Now let’s take you home so you can rest well, even if I don’t want to let you go just yet” he says cheekily.
The elevator dings and you realize that you are already on your floor. You start to feel sad but Mingyu still walks you over to your apartment down the hall, the two of you constantly exchanging glances as you get to your door slowly.
“Goodnight Mingyu! Thank you again, boyfriend, I’ll see you tomorrow at the bakery after class?” You quip. Mingyu nods and you kiss him on the cheek before typing in your door combination.
“Boyfriend huh? Goodnight then Y/n, sleep tight love. I don’t want to let you go just yet” he pouts. You laugh again and give him one last peck, this time on his lips, which causes his eyes to widen again.
“You’ll see me tomorrow! Now go rest up sleepyhead, you always work so hard” After you finish that sentence, you open the door and bid him one last goodbye before he walks away, and you walk into your apartment.
Once the door is closed, you hear the shrieks of your roommates and massage your temples. You were going to be in for it tonight, but at least you finally had the man of your dreams.
© rubyuji 2024’ -. no part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any manner without the permission from the publisher.
#seventeen imagines#seventeen blurbs#seventeen fluff#seventeen angst#seventeen ff#seventeen one shots#seventeen drabbles#seventeen au#seventeen fanfic#seventeen#seventeen kpop#kpop imagines#kpop blurbs#kpop fluff#kpop angst#kpop ff#kpop one shots#kpop drabbles#kpop au#kpop fanfic#mingyu imagines#mingyu angst#mingyu fluff#mingyu ff#mingyu oneshots#kim mingyu#kim mingyu imagines#kim mingyu oneshots#mingyu drabbles#mingyu au
361 notes
·
View notes
Text
Slutmas Day 6
Stressed & Insecure (Matt)
Request: None
Warnings: Mommy kink, talk of poor mental heath, angsty at first, Matt being insecure, talk of body dysmorphia, friends to lovers, cockwarming, oral, whiny Matt
“You’re such a good boy for letting mommy take care of you like this”
Matt’s pov
Everything sucks right now, I’m so busy with work, it’s taking up all of my time, and everything going on right now backs up to that. I was purely stressed from work originally, which I know might seem easy, but don’t be fooled because it’s not. We’ve had so many meetings for sponsored content, videos, guest appearances, and merch designing, on top of filming for our YouTube and the Podcast. I’m genuinely just drained, my anxiety is high, I can’t sleep, and I’m overall in a bad mood.
I know what you’re thinking, ‘why not just jack off?’ well that’s because I can’t. I guess with being stressed and overwhelmed by everything, my cock just won’t get hard. It probably doesn’t help that my body is constantly getting hated on because of my weight, it makes me really insecure and uncomfortable with myself and my body. I was sitting at my desk doing some more online work and it was pissing me off, I’m so frustrated! I’m just doing so much overthinking and it’s making me stressed, overwhelmed, and insecure.
Just as I threw my notebook across the room there was a small knock and Chris popped his head in. “Matt, are you alright? Do you need anything?” Chris asked, knowing I wasn’t in the best mental state. “I’m fine, I just want to be alone” I sighed back, “Are you still coming to Larray’s house with us tonight?” I completely forgot about that. Chris looked a bit disappointed by my answer but he understood, “Nah I’m just gonna stay here, ‘m stressed and overwhelmed right now so I won’t be any fun” I said before Chris closed the door.
That was my insecurities talking, I always found myself rather boring and unenthusiastic when I’m in these moods. It had been about an hour of trying to get hard and then sitting in my chair with my head in my hands. My door slowly creeped open and I immediately assumed it was Chris or Nick. “Get the fuck out of my room!” I yelled, turning around to be met with my best friends confused face. “I’m sorry, Chris said they were leaving and I should come keep you company because you’re having a bad day. I didn’t mean to make you upset” Y/n said quite nervously. I slammed my fist down on my desk before completely losing it, hot tears rolling down my face.
1 hour earlier
Y/n’s pov
I was at a nail appointment when I got a text message, I was already done with my fingers and in the chair for my toes.
iMessage start at 5:02pm
Chrisizzle🍊
bro are you busy
Y/n/n🪼
i’m getting my toes done rn
why
Chrisizzle🍊
at 5:30 me and nick are going to larray’s for the night
so i wanted to ask you a favor
yk how matt’s been kinda moody lately?
well today he’s really stressed and sad so he’s in a bad mood and i don’t want him to be alone tonight so can you head over afterwards and chill with him?
Y/n/n🪼
you literally just set up a playdate for your child lmao
but yeah i’ll go over there, i’ve missed my matty poo
Chrisizzle🍊
wow but you don’t miss me
that one hurt Y/n/n 🥲
anyways lmk when you get to our house bc we leave in 15
Y/n/n🪼
awe of course i miss you too sizzle 🤍
i’m abt to pay then I’ll head over
Chrisizzle🍊
don’t call me sizzle
*Y/n/n🪼 disliked this message*
iMessage ends at 5:37pm
The message had been from one of my best friends, Chris, he asked if I would go hang with his triplet bother, Matt, for tonight. I know he’s been getting a lot of hate about his attitude/weight and has been down the past 2 or 3 weeks, so I was hoping to cheer him up. I drove directly to the boys house after paying for my nails since I had a bunch of essentials over there and didn’t need anything from home.
I let myself in with my key and walked up to Matt’s room, which groans of frustration could be heard coming from. I lightly knocked before entering his room, as I was reclosing the door Matt yelled. “Get the fuck out of my room!” he said angrily, Matt’s never yelled at me before and he looked so pissed off that I got a little nervous.
I quickly replied with “I’m sorry, Chris said they were leaving and I should come keep you company because you’re having a bad day. I didn’t mean to make you upset” he looked at me for a second before I saw his face change to one of pain, hurt, and anxiety. Matt slammed his fist onto his desk yelling “Fuck!” before choking out into sobs.
His whole body was shaking and he slid out of his chair onto the floor, something he does when he’s really, really upset. I immediately ran over to sit next to him, wrapping my arms around his shaking figure. “I’m sorry! They hate me and I’m sorry!” he blurted out, causing me to be a bit confused as Matt’s hands desperately clung onto my shirt.
“It’s okay Matt, let it all out. You’re safe honey, I’ve got you-“ I was cut off by Matt pulling away from my shirt and basically screamed out in pain. “I don’t know what the fuck I did! Y/n, what’s wrong with me!? A-Am I not good enough!? I’m too skinny, I try to eat more but I can’t gain weight, I fucking hate my body! All I keep doing is disappointing everyone, Y/n I-I don-“ he started spiraling into a panic attack and I was worried, I have never seen Matt this bad before.
I didn’t know what else to do so I pushed past my own anxieties and kissed him. I cupped both of his cheeks and smashed our lips together, Matt was shocked at first so he didn’t kiss back but once he realized what was happening, he kissed back. I pulled away and Matt’s lips tried to chase mine before he opened his eye.
“W-What was that for?” he asked, a bit breathless from his previous breakdown. I suddenly felt shy so I looked down, “I uh- I didn’t know how else to get you to stop talking” I said, nervously playing with my fingers. “Oh, well thanks?” he said in a questioning tone, “Did you mean what you said about your body? Do you really think that?” I softly asked.
Matt groaned and stood up, offering me his hand, “I don’t want to talk about it but yes, I do hate my body” he mumbled as I too stood up. We made our way over to his bed and laid there in silence for a few minutes. I rolled over to my side facing Matt “Have you tried cumming?” I questioned quietly, “What!?” he rolled to face me as well, confused by what I just said.
“You know, because you’re stressed. I think I read somewhere that having an orgasm helps to relieve stress” Matt’s face was now painted red. He rolled over to be flat on his back again, “I’ve tried but I can’t get hard” he exhaled deeply. “Oh… I could try to help if you want” I offered, chewing on my nails, Matt turned to face me again, “Help.. me get… Help me get hard?” he questioned nervously.
We both had blush covering our faces at this point, “Yeah, then I can go chill in Nicks room and you can jerk off” I smiled shyly. “I mean that could work but I don’t want to be naked if you have clothes on” “You don’t have to be naked, you just have to trust me” “I-I trust you, how do we start though?” we conversed. I took a moment to think before asking, “Do you want to make out first, I know I’m like a lot bigger than you so I don’t know if it would be a problem for me to sit on your lap. Is it a problem?” I asked self-consciously as we both sat up.
Matt looked at me with an unamused look, “If that’s your way of making me feel worse about my body, it worked because your body is amazing” he huffed out, avoiding looking at me. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel that way” I said with a sad smile, upset that I hurt Matts feelings. “I know you didn’t but my body is like the main reason I cant get hard. I don’t like looking at myself naked, it shows off too much of what’s wrong with me” he replied.
It was silent again for a few minute until I broke the silence again, “I think it’s hot” “What?” Matt looked at me confused. “Your body, I think it’s hot” I smirked, “You think so?” “I know so, don’t you ever notice me staring at you when you’re shirtless or only wearing your boxers?” I teased some more. “I haven’t noticed actually, however, I have noticed you’re not on my lap yet” Matt pouted, pulling me onto his lap.
I was about to say something but was cut off by Matt grabbing the side of my face/neck and pulled me into a sweet kiss that quickly turned needy. I pulled back for a second to catch my breath, “Shit, I’m sorry! I’m just so touch starved and crave physical affection. You were gonna say something?” he panicked. “It’s okay, I know that physical touch is your love language, it’s one of the things I like about you. I forgot what I was going to say but I can tell you I’ll kiss you again” I giggled.
With that, Matt pulled my face to his again and this time the kiss was soft, yet also rough and needy. I had my hands wrapped around Matt’s neck, but his laid awkwardly at his sides, almost as if he’s scared to touch me. I pulled back from the kiss to grab his wrist and mumbled something against his lips. “You can touch me you know” I smirked as I placed Matt’s hands on my waist and went back to kissing him.
Matt’s hands quickly slid down and tightly gripped onto my hips, slowly starting to rock me back and forth. I started feeling his cock get hard and once I could tell he was fully hard, I stopped everything which caused Matt to let out a displeased whine. “Mmh why’d you stop?” he pouted, “Because you’re hard now, which means it’s my queue to leave” I said while trying to get up.
Matt held my hips down and begged, “Please don’t go! I-I don’t think I’ll be able to make myself cum, me being alone with my naked body sounds like a bad dream” he sighed. Piggybacking off what was just said he added, “W-Would you please m-make me feel good? I’ll let you have your way with me as long as it’s not super rough because I’m not in the mood for that” his eyes got a shade or two darker.
“Yeah, I can give you head if you want or you can sit back, relax and enjoy the full sub treatment” “Does the full sub treatment include sex? Because I’ve never been the submissive one before, I uh usually do doggy so my body isn’t seen as much. I’ve never even had a chick ride me before but you being on top sounds really hot, we don’t to have sex by the way, I was just saying if you wanted to I’m down” Matt confessed.
“If you stop talking about sex with other women, you have a deal. I might keep my shirt on though” I replied as I started slowly rocking my hips again. Matt’s grip on my waist tightened and he thrusted his hips up, his hard-on pressing against my clit so nicely that I let out a small, quiet moan. His eyes grew even darker after that, “No you will not. I wanna see your beautiful belly, I just know it’s gonna turn me on so much more” he instructed me.
I blushed and nodded, “Okay then handsome, just lay back and let me do all the work, tonight is all about you” I said, watching him nod before my lips were on his. I slid my tongue across his bottom lip, silently asking for access to his mouth which was quickly granted. He had a bit of trouble giving up control over the kiss at first but once I started trailing my kisses down his throat, he finally gave up on trying to win.
Matt’s pov
After Y/n had dominated the kiss, we made out for a bit before she started kissing down my neck. Once she reached the collar of my shit, she stopped and stood up to unbutton her pants. “If you really want me to make you feel good, take your pants off for me” she said seductively as she pulled off her own baggy jeans. I followed her directions and pulled my sweats off before grabbing her hand and leading her to sit on my lap again.
Y/n sat on my lap again before taking off her shirt, leaving her in a black lacy bra with matching panties. “Fuck… you look so goddamn beautiful” I said while looking into her eyes, my hands running up her thighs. “Mmm, thank you handsome. Can I take your shirt off?” she smiled, placing a short but sweet kiss to my lips, “You can do whatever you want to me” I panted, already being completely whipped for her.
She took my shirt off before whispering in my ear, “You’re such a good boy for letting mommy taking care of you like this” as I helped her get my pants and boxers off. “Such a pretty cock Matty. You gonna let me make you feel good?” Y/n teased, making me squirm a bit. “Please! Please just make me cum!” I pathetically begged as I watched her hand slowly move up and down my cock.
Y/n’s pov
“Anything for my sweet boy. Now tell me what it is that you want baby” I asked softly, loving how fucked out he looked already. “Want your mouth please mommy! Want you to ride me after!” Matt confessed all whiny and desperate, and who was I to deny him that? Without a word, I nodded before bring his tip into my mouth, loving the whimper he let out, “Yeah j-just like that, fuck!” he groaned as I swirled my tongue around his tip.
After teasing Matt a little bit, I decided to fully take him into my mouth, almost immediately deepthroating his cock. “Holy shit mommy! You’re so good at this! I won’t last long!” he cried out, bucking his hips up when I hummed against him. I continued doing this for a few more minutes when I felt Matt start to twitch in my mouth, his lower abdomen contacting as well.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck! I’m gonna cum— shit!” he whimpered as his hips thrusted upward and his left hand came down to hold my head in place. His right hand was pulling at his own hair as he shout a huge load into my mouth, so much that it was literally dripping out of the corners of my mouth. As I came up for air, I wiped the corners of my mouth to clean up the spilled cum and then licked it off.
“Did that feel good Matty? You were such a good boy” I smile as I placed a sweet kiss to his lips. “More! I-I need more! Y/n please, I need you to ride me. I’m so fucking hard still, I need to drain my balls in you” Matt begged me. “So needed aren’t we?” “Yes, please I need you” Matt nearly yelled with tears in his eyes. “Okay, okay, calm down sweet boy. You’ll get what you want, just be patient” I spoke softly as I pulled off my panties and unhooked my bra.
Matts hands immediately went down to my ass, staring up at me with a look of desperation. “Are you gonna be a good boy?” “Very good!” I smiled as I slowly sunk down on his cock, trying to adjust to how long and thick it was. “S-So tight mommy! So f-fucking tight!” Matt whimpered out as I started to move up and down with the help of him. Both of us were moaning quite loudly as I started to move faster, pulling his hair in the process.
“Such a good boy Matty, making mommy feel so good with your big cock!” “W-Want you to cum. Wanna f-fill you up” Matt grunted as he started bucking his hips up into me at a fast pace. We were both very close and with one more thrust that hit my g-spot perfectly, I was cumming on his cock. “Fuck Matt, I’m cumming. Oh god— cum for me baby!” I cried as I rode through my orgasm, starting to slightly overstimulated but wanting Matt to cum.
With a loud whiny growl, Matt came inside of me, this load was equally as big as the one from earlier, instantly dripping down his balls. “Holy shit— I love you, and I’m not just saying that because you gave me the most mind blowing orgasm ever. I genuinely love you Y/n” Matt confess as he started to rub my back. “I love you too Matt, I mean it” I smiled as I placed a soft kiss to his lips “Don’t get off, cockwarm me all night please” he sweetly asked.
I agreed and we got situated so we could lay down, Matt turning off his bedside lamp in the process. “Tomorrow, I’m gonna take you on the best date of your life, but for now, goodnight pretty lady” “Goodnight Matt, I love you” I mumbled into his neck, feeling the sleep take over my body. “I love you too, and thank you for tonight. Now get some rest baby” was the final thing to be said before we drifted off to sleep.
All work is subject to copyright
© Daddyslilchickenfingers2 2023
Do not steal my work
#sturniolo triplets#smut#sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo triplet smut#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo smut#sturniolo triplets smut#matt sturniolo#matthew sturniolo smut#matthew sturniolo x you#matthew sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo#sturniolo triplets imagine#sturniolos#the sturniolo triplets#slutmas#daddyslilchickenfingers
413 notes
·
View notes
Text
Relapse
Billie eilish x fem!reader
Warnings: talks of self harm, cutting, blood, little bit sexual, angst, age regression towards the end, hurt/comfort
You didn’t mean to. You really didn’t, but it was too hard not to. The familiar feeling welcoming you in the worst ways possible. It felt like you weren’t even human, you couldn’t feel anything but yet you could feel everything all at once. Feeling the cold metal blade in your hand, looking down at your thighs, seeing the blood coat them. You felt satisfied for a second but then the guilt creeped in and you felt yourself tearing up. You sat on the bathroom floor sobbing, holding yourself as you cried.
After about half an hour, you tried to clean yourself up as best you could and started to get dressed. What you didn’t know that Maggie was coming up the stairs into the room to check on you, since finneas and Maggie were over at y’all’s house to keep you company since billie isn’t here right now. You were putting on a oversized shirt when Maggie slightly opened the door to see you changing and caught a glimpsed of your thighs. She quickly shut the door as quietly as she could and let out a shaky breath.
Maggie quickly went down the stairs and let finneas know what she saw. They were both extremely worried about you and decided to call Billie right away. When she answered, they immediately told her about what had happened. How Maggie went to go check on you and she accidentally saw you changing and saw the cuts on your thighs. The phone went silent until finneas broke it by asking if billie was okay and she couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “No. She would have come to me. She promised me that she wouldn’t do that anymore and I made the same promise to her.” Was all that billie said before she abruptly hung up.
It was the next day and that’s when Billie had a day off so the two of you could spend some quality time together. She was leaving kisses down your body, her kisses light and gentle as she goes down even further. Her hands bunched up your shirt and started kissing your thighs. When her lips made contact with your scabbed over skin she immediately pulled away harshly making your heart drop when you realized you got caught. “B-billie I-“ you started but she interrupted you. “You promised. My mom said she saw the cuts and she told finneas and they called me. I didn’t believe them. Why didn’t you come to me?” She said, her voice becoming a little louder with each word.
“I-I’m sorry..”. Was all you said and she got off the bed, hands buried in her hair as she tries to process all of this. You were panicking, was she gonna leave you? Was this how you were going to lose her? The thoughts wouldn’t stop racing through your mind and In less than five minutes you were slipping into your headspace. Billie was in heels own world when she didn’t even see her girlfriend shut down and go into her headspace but when she looked back over you had this dazed looked on your face which confused her. “Oh so you have nothing to say now?” She snapped not realizing what she had done. You whimpered and hid yourself under the covers, your body starting to shake as you quietly sobbed. Billies face drained color as she realized that she had fucked up.
She was so angry and mad at herself for not noticing you struggling that she didn’t know that you had shut down. She carefully went over to you and removed the covers from over you, her heart breaking as she sees your scared and sad expression on your face. “Babygirl…mommy is so sorry.” She says with a soft voice making you look up at her. “Sowwy…”. You whimpered out as you apologized for everything. You didn’t mean to break her promise, you truly didn’t, but you were struggling mentally so bad and you didn’t want to bother Billie. She shakes her head and takes your red face into her soft hands. “You have no reason to apologize princess. Mommy was just so mad at herself because I couldn’t help you and I’m so sorry.” She apologized as tears gathered in her eyes making you worry.
You climb into her lap and started wiping her tears away which makes her chuckles at how truly amazing and kind you are. “Tis Otay mommy…”. You said, wrapping your arms around her. “Please babygirl. If you ever have bad and scary thoughts you can always come to mommy okay? That goes for your big self too.” She said, lifting your chin up so you can look into her eyes as she speaks. You nodded and laid your head on her chest, her heartbeat making you sleepy. “I’ll always be here for you princess. No matter what. You are the strongest and bravest little one I know. Mommy will love you till the day that she dies.”
A/n: this one is for @boredandneedfanfics and for anyone that is struggling. Know that I see you and that everything will be okay <3 I hope y’all enjoy and Remember to stay hydrated and to rest! Take care of yourselves. I love y’all :) Halloween/fall/kinktober requests are still opened!
#billie eilish blurb#billie eilish fic#billie eilish oneshot#billie eilish imagine#billie eilish x fem!reader#billie eilish fluff#billie eilish x you#billie eilish fanfiction#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish smut#billie eilish#eilish#billie eilish angst#billie o’connell#billie#billieeilish
120 notes
·
View notes
Note
could you write a fic about simon and a reader who is going through withdrawals? Sorry if that's not real specific, you can take it in what ever direction you please. Thank you
Hope
pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x fem! reader word count: 2k summary: Simon helps you get through withdrawals, offering you hope in the darkest point of your life. a/n: heed the warnings please!!!! I cried a good bit while writing this. You're never alone my friends, and there is always hope. Always. (p.s. there is a mention of wanting children in this fic, so keep that in mind. p.p.s why does tumblr destroy my image quality, it makes me sad.) warnings: opioid addiction, withdrawals, addiction, emetophobia, illness masterlist
"Si-Simon, I can't do this. I'm n-not strong enough." You whimper, clammy hands gripping onto his shirt with every pathetic ounce of strength that you can muster. Your voice is hoarse, throat thick with mucus and body covered in a stale cold sweat that soaks through your oversized t-shirt. Simon has never seen you so weak, so frail in his arms.
He's seen you take down men twice your size, clear rooms with more than ten enemies. You've faced countless opponents, broken through endless physical and mental barriers, but in the end, the one thing you couldn't defeat was the pills.
If you'd known you were trading your life away when you were handed the bottle, you never would have taken it in the first place.
"For the pain." The doctor had said, "Just until this gunshot wound clears up."
Only it didn't. Before you even realized it, your body was already addicted. You craved the numbness that the damned capsules gave you, the release from the endless pain that singed your nerves day and night. You couldn't give them up. You tried– but the sickness that came when you stopped– you were sure it would kill you.
Simon didn't know what to do. You lied, you kept him at a distance, never fully explaining to him what was going on. He didn't realize how bad it was. He tried not to pry, or to push you, but Simon put his foot down when he found you on the bathroom floor unconscious, a bottle of pills on the counter, half empty. His words reverberated in your ears, a harsh warning that he wouldn't watch you kill yourself.
"You have to get clean, Y/N." He'd said from a place of love, but you couldn't help but crumble under his judgment, "I can't watch you do this to yourself anymore. You 'ave to sober up."
So here you are, a heap in Simon's lap, the both of you intertwined on the bathroom floor as you fight the overwhelming illness that accompanies withdrawals. Everything you've survived: loss, wounds, torture– it pales in comparison to the misery you're experiencing now. You refused to go to a detox center, not wanting to lose your position in the Task Force. You promised Simon that you'd let him drive you to the hospital if things got bad, but you want to do this at home.
Bile rises from your stomach, lingering in the back of your throat as you gag. Immediately, Simon pulls your hair back into his fist, and helps to position you over the toilet.
You dry heave, gagging on air as both of your cold hands grip the toilet bowl. Your wedding band glints in the dim bathroom light, bringing another layer of anguish to your already broken soul.
He shouldn't have to deal with this.
"Easy, love. Get it all out. I've got you." Simon coos as your stomach aches and flips, desperate to rid itself of any contents. Only you haven't been able to eat, so nothing comes up but painful bursts of air. You gasp and heave, collapsing back against Simon and erupting into loud sobs. Your bones ache as you fall onto his chest, and his hands hover over your form, unsure on how to hold you without shattering you even further.
"I can't– I can't! Simon, please! Please. I'm going to die. M' gonna die–" You panic, "I'm not strong enough. You know that I'm not." You plead, begging for the substance that he has already flushed down the drain, your mind refuses to believe that it's actually gone.
Simon's previously unbreakable heart manages to crack, and he wishes more than anything to carry the burden of your suffering. You're his wife, and it's his job to take the weight off your shoulders, but he can't do this for you. He can, however, be with you every step of the way. You showed him a new way of living, a way to do more than just survive. You've shown him love when he was undeserving of it. It's unbearable for him to see you, such a beam of light, in so much pain.
"Look at me, baby. Look at me." Simon holds your face until your eyes meet his. Those chestnut colored irises hold your attention– the same ones you looked into as you read your vows, as you suffered pain, and loss, felt love and lust. They've watched after you through everything.
"You can do this, yeah? You're the strongest person I know. Stronger than any other soldier in the Task Force, stronger than me. If anyone can beat this, it's you." Simon reassures.
Your face crumples when you realize he's firm in his decision. You shake your head, clammy palms coming to rest against your face.
"Please, Simon." You beg once again. Your body is trembling like a leaf held against the wind, cold wraps around your bones suffocatingly, squeezing every ounce of comfort from your being and leaving you high and dry. Pure, unadulterated suffering.
"Come 'ere." Simon whispers, standing up from the tile floor and scooping you into his arms. He hooks his arms under your head and knees before carrying you into the bedroom.
The soft bed dips under your shared weight as Simon lays down with you, his body wrapping around your own like a perfect puzzle piece. He pulls your back to his chest, letting you use his tattooed arm as a pillow. Your sobs quiet down to muffled whimpers as you shake lightly, wishing you could go back in time, solve this before it became a problem.
Father time has never been merciful though, has he?
"Blanket or no?" Simon asks. You nod your head quickly.
"Yes, it's so cold. I'm so cold." Your teeth chatter lightly as you reiterate. Simon pulls the thick comforter over your forms, tucking it in around the edges as he adjusts behind you.
An hour ago you were burning up, stripping off your clothes and sobbing at the heat clawing its way through your body like some sort of fiery plague. He'd put you in a cool bath, checking your temperature probably more often than what was necessary.
You shake and writhe, whimpers and groans of agony slipping past your lips every once in a while. It's killing Simon to see you like this. Every ounce of light has drained from your eyes, the life has seeped from your pores, replaced with the lingering disease of addiction. He misses your laughter, your smile. It could light up a room. You've gotten the boys through many dark days. You were the sunshine of the Task Force. Failed missions, loss, heartache, no matter how bad things got, your optimism never ceased. Not until recently, anyhow.
"We'll get there again." Simon tells himself like a mantra in his head,"She'll get better."
He's personally seeing that you do. He won't allow you the pills to take hold of you, he'll fight. He's seen more soldiers die from pills than bullets. He won't let you meet that fate, he won't.
He can't lose you.
The room is covered with a calm silence, only the sound of your quick breathing to let him know you're still alive. Simon is quiet as well, and you drown in the silence, hoping for any kind of distraction to pull you away from your unending misery. You can feel yourself giving up, wanting nothing more than to slip into old habits. You slip your eyes shut, opening them only once a voice rumbles in your ear.
"I was thinking… when you're better we'll get a bigger house." Simon quietly blurts out from behind you.
A wrinkle forms in between your brows, and you crane your neck to look at him. You're sure he's trying to distract you, coming up with random conversation to keep your mind off of the present. When you look back, his gaze is far away, fixed on something on the far wall. A small smile graces his uncovered lips– he's been keeping the mask off at home recently, you've noticed. There is a light in his eyes, a light that you used to think would never grace the eyes of Simon Riley.
"What? Why would we need a bigger house?" You ask with a small chuckle. He's succeeding in his distraction, you realize.
His eyes flicker down to yours, hand gripping onto your waist as you turn towards him in curiosity. Your eyelids are heavy, another wave of exhaustion coming over you.
"For the little ones." Simon responds.
He says it on a breath. He says it so plainly, so effortlessly, that tears immediately well in your eyes. He's never responded to your questions about children– usually shutting down or ignoring the topic wholly. Your lip wobbles, and he runs his thumb over the cracked skin.
"Ch-children?" You ask, a new sense of hope filling your being. A new reason to fight– to get clean. Children. A family.
"A girl, with your eyes…" Simon chuckles, "Probably with your attitude too."
You laugh at that, tears slipping down your cheeks in landing on his hand that cups your face.
"Maybe a boy. Hopefully he gets your features n' not my ugly mug." Simon huffs.
"What changed…?" You ask, wincing as a wave of nausea pulses through your body. Simon's eyes go wide for a second, and his grip tightens on you, ready in an instant to carry you back into the bathroom if you need. The pain passes and you shake your head, signaling that you're okay. Immediately, he relaxes. It's quiet for a moment as Simon traces his thumb over your paper thin skin.
"A dog, a new house, babies, anything you want. I'll give you anything you want, just get better for me, baby." Simon pleads, a hint of vulnerability tracing his words. It's one of only a few times he's begged you.
"I don't want a future without you in it. I want my wife. I want our kids terrorizing the place, I want to get old and retire the Force with you. Hell, I'd turn in my letter of resignation today if you asked, just please, fight for me, love."
The tears are falling freely now, you don't try to stop them. Guilt fills your being at the realization of everything you've put your husband through for the past few months. Through it all, he's never left your side. He's still here. Kissing closed your wounds, and promising to plant flowers in their place.
A soft kiss is pressed to your forehead before amber eyes peek down at you through blonde eyelashes. You chew on your lip, a bad habit.
Your resolve is set, and even though your body shrieks for the opposite, you'll get through this. You have to.
You have Sunday mornings to look forward to, lazily pouring Simon a cup of tea in his favorite mug. You have a house to buy, with two bedrooms instead of one. Dragging Simon through the shops and picking out all the different onesies he'll let you bring home. You have walks through the park to go on. You have to pick up takeout on Simon's late nights at work. You have to sit on his desk while you share an entree and talk to him until he forgets about the paperwork he's supposed to be doing. So many little actions to go through, little memories to make. You can't give it up. You won't.
There is so much to fight for, so much to hope for, all given to you by the man before you. Tears sting your eyes again as you finally speak up.
"I promise you, Simon. I'll fight. For us, I will."
#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost simon riley#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x female reader#simon riley#cod x reader#cod x y/n#cod modern warfare#cod mw2#ghost call of duty#call of duty fanfic#cod fanfic#ghost cod#ghost mw2#cod mw22#cod mw x reader
395 notes
·
View notes
Note
hiiiii
ahh I so get having no motivation
as a fic writer myself it’s so much easier and sometimes it even feels more rewarding to send a request to another amazing writer than to write your concepts yourself 😀
cause you know ✨procrastination✨
And I totally get having no motivation don’t sweat
THAT SAID
could I req something with Kurt where he comes back from a tour reader couldn’t go on in a really bad place, and reader just decides to pamper him in all ways possible?? It’s your choice whether to include smut or not :)))))
AND can I become the first member of the anon family?? If by the time I send this I’m still the first
-snoitatulas,
🫨.
iloveyoy thank you for the Kurt req😭 i wrote smut headcanons for him a while back and that was kind of uncomfortable, its weird writing smut for someone who’s passed already but that doesn’t mean im not gonna do it!!!!1
more kurt requests please i love him 😞
Also yes you can! Im assuming you wanna be 🫨 anon?
Warnings: mention of drugs, mental health issues, angst and fluff, non sexual shower, small argument, and popcorn throwing.
Pairing: Kurt cobain x AFAB Reader
———————————————————————
You couldn’t go on this tour. Your boss wouldn’t allow you to miss one more day of work for a tour. You would lose your job.
Even though Kurt could EASILY support both of you, you didn’t like the idea of being completely dependent on him.
It had been several months since you last saw Kurt, you two had been calling every night since he left.
The tour was over, and you knew that because you had been counting the minutes until your boyfriend could come home.
He opened the door and you came running, with a big cheesy grin on your face.
It instantly faded as you saw him, he didn’t look good at all. He looked like he had been doing drugs again and he look sad.
“Hey, my love..” he mumbled out, a little light returning to his eyes when he saw you. He clearly loved you.
That once cheesy grin turned into a sad frown, taking big steps towards him and embracing him.
He wrapped his arms around you as you took in that familiar scent. Cigarettes and rain, it was a comforting smell.
Some days, you would go outside in the rain and smoke a cigarette, just to feel his presence.
You held him and he just seemed down. You led him to your bathroom, he looked like he needed a shower..
You helped him get undressed, he didn’t protest. You got undressed too, you knew he loved showering with you.
You warmed up the shower and helped him in, letting the water hit him.
You grabbed the shampoo and rubbed it into his hair, as he sighed. In relief, in exhaustion.
You watched as the soap ran down his body and into the drain, placing small kisses on his cheek and jaw to try and make him feel better.
He smiled, just a little, and put his hands on your hips as you rubbed conditioner into his hair.
“Your hair is so greasy, Kurt.” You teased and he smiled a little more.
And soon enough you were out of the shower, bringing him clean clothes. You both got dressed and you dried his hair.
“Rough tour?” You asked gently, playing with his clean, soft hair that was now splayed on your lap.
He had made himself comfortable, using your thighs as a pillow.
“Yeah.. i missed you, love. I..i was using again too.” He admitted, watching as your small smile faded into a frown.
“Is it bad?..” you asked. “No, no its not. Not anything like it used to be.” He reassured.
“Are you sure?.. please dont lie to me Kurt, i can’t handle losing you.” You mumbled.
“Are you saying im lying?” He said, defensive.
“No, no! Thats not what im saying. Im saying IF you’re lying .. i just wanna make sure you’re okay..” You answered, trying to calm him down.
“God i- i shouldn’t have told you that. I knew you would have thought i was lying.” He mumbled.
“Kurt you KNOW thats not what i meant!” You said, slightly hurt. He sighed, and nodded. “Fine.” He muttered. “Im sorry.” You said.
A while later you were curled up on the couch with his favorite snacks, watching some movie he really liked.
He brought his lips to yours, smiling as he pulled back and went back to watching the movie.
You tossed some popcorn at his head, giggling as he feigned offense. “How could you throw popcorn at me, darling?” He said dramatically.
“Oh hush up, im sure you’ll survive.” You teased.
After the movie, Kurt was drowsy and you came to terms with the fact you were both sleeping on the couch.
You pulled a nearby blanket over the two of you, and kissed kurts forehead gently.
“I love you Kurt.” You muttered.
“I love you too, darling.” He responded quietly as he drifted off to sleep.
———-————-————-————-————-———
he’s adorable ilove him
😭❤️ im not okay i wanna hug him.
#fanfic#nirvana#kurt cobain x reader#kurt cobain#krist novoselic#dave ghrol#nirvanna the band the show#i love him#i wish he was still here:(#i wish i could go back in time and hug him#70s#80s#90s#grunge
39 notes
·
View notes
Note
VACATION SEX!!!!!! Specifically thinking about either beomgyu or lix for this one idk why they are so cute and would just be so easy to fluster
Like spending the whole day at the hotel pool or waterpark subtly teasing him, eyeing him up in his swimsuit without even hiding it just to see him blush, grabbing his ass when he walks in front of you, “accidentally” grinding up against him in the wave pool bc the water was just too rough before suddenly deciding you want to go tan as he begs to stay in the water a bit longer so he can calm down bc poor baby gets hard from the smallest touches. but of course you drag him out anyway as he pretends he doesn’t like the embarrassment of having to walk in front of everyone with a boner. & sitting him down on the towel to rub sunscreen on his chest and back, paying extra attention to his nipples as he whines that you guys are in public and anybody could see, even though he pushes his chest out into your hands for more (tsk tsk again with the pretending to hate the embarrassment) and also pretending to fumble with the sunscreen and dropping it on the opposite side so you have to lean over him to get it, putting your hand right by his throat for leverage and practically shoving your chest in his face as he whines harder
AND THEN FINALLYYY after a long day of him having to endure all the torturous touches and you making up excuses to stay at the pool longer because it’s funny to see him lose it, you bring him back to the room. and he is already desperate and pliant just waiting to be thrown around and used as your little doll. he’s sitting patiently on the bed as you lock the door and put up the do not disturb sign before turning to him and shoving him down onto the bed, climbing onto his lap and grinding against him like how he’s been waiting for all day. bonus points for a sloppy kissing session with his arms pinned by his head as he can hardly reciprocate bc he’s moaning so much and begging as he thrusts up into your bathing suit, asking in the sweetest voice “please please take it off, touch me, just do anything!” and how can you resist your sweet boy who’s been so patient even though he’s been waiting so long?
and round 2 in the shower afterwards bc you can’t go to bed soaked in that chlorine water… but i had this epiphany while i was scrolling through pinterest and had to tell you. anyway i see that you’re having another busy week, remember to take breaks and relax if things get too overwhelming!! also don’t forget to eat and drink water:) nothing is more important than your mental and physical health
-🎀
thank you so much<3, i'm actually gonna take a break over the weekend so everything i post is queued and i'm just going to relax for the holidays and recharge after everything that's been going on!
honestly, thank you for caring, it feels really good to have people understanding that it takes quite a bit out of my time and is also mentally as well as physically draining,
but anyway,
going on a vacation with lixie, holy fuck, the sunscreen visual you gave me was the best fucking thing in the world,
teasing him all while under the guise of simply keeping the poor baby's skin safe from the sun, brushing over his nipples, smirking as he whines about being and public, begging you to stop all while he keeps pushing his chest further into your touch and you really can’t help but notice the way he’s subtly pressing himself against your knee
whispering to him about how he’s a dirty boy, wanting to get off on your thigh in front of all these people, the little perv
he tries his very hardest not to moan from that, his lip pulled between his teeth, tiny hands fisted at his sides to keep from touching your when you ‘accidentally’ drop the lotion bottle, leaning over his body to retrieve it
after you notice how red your baby is, brushing your fingers over his freckles with a slight frown, cooing about how he’s gotten burnt all while you know damn well the effects you’re having on him. He nods along sullenly, giving his best puppy eyes and you decide to be merciful, saying you should go back to the room now so he doesn’t get more burnt
that do not disturb sign getting put to good use but he only blushes as you put it up, imagining about fifty different positions he wishes you would fuck him in right about now
he’s just so needy when you finally touch him, whining and pawing at your body, lips latching onto your skin wherever they can find purchase.
so sensitive and so worked up, moaning when you finally begin to grind down on him. he swears he can see stars, he’s so pent up from all of your teasing touches and malicious, knowing smiles
his hands rest on your hips, wanting to explore, not wanting to piss you of any further, looking up at you with the sweetest doe eyes
“can I touch, please, please, let me touch, I promise, I promise, I’ll make you feel good, I’ll make you feel so good.”
his lips leave wet kisses all over the top of your chest, a trail of saliva left behind costing your skin
but no, no because you pin his hands above his head, “no touching puppy.”
Poor puppy cries out, as you kiss him, messy and sloppy with teeth and tongue and drool and his tears mixing in, thrusting up desperately
and when you pull away you can’t help but admire how pretty he is, all messed up
“i-I’ll do anything! I’ll be good-I promise I’ll be so good!” He cries
so you take pity, grabbing the phone off the nightstand and handing it to him while you reach over to put the number in.
“okay puppy, call room service for me, make sure to not make a sound and maybe if you do good baby, I’ll give my good boy a reward~”
you slither down his body, pulling his swim trunks down right as a voice comes over the phone
“room service, how can I help you?”
—
sorry this is a bit sloppy and rushed, I wrote it on my phone right as I was about to leave😭
#inbox💌#sub felix#stray kids hard thoughts#hard thoughts#ideas👀#felix smut#felix x reader#stray kids smut#stray kids x reader#sub stray kids
294 notes
·
View notes
Note
I love all the ideas and your response has given me some more to chew on for this au ty. (I might have already sent this but I'm not sure it sent but if it did i am sorry for the double ask)
[Wukong spending the Journey getting hit by all the symptoms of pregnancy during those 9-14 years.] the morning sickness is def the worst for him.
[Many foes back off just by the tired firey glare in the King's eyes.] his presence alone is usually able to get most of them to back off, but for those who were still going to risk trying a tired "I am running on 2 hours of sleep, crippling isolation and lonliness, and I haven't been able to keep any food down for three days, I am not in the mood" glare is enough to sen them running for the hills.
[Wukong never managed to tell Macaque about the Egg in that lifetime.] this fact breaks Wukong's heart, and it breaks Macaque to when he later learns that was with child the whole time because having a peacful life and a family was all he really ever wanted.
[He's convinced that the Egg's presence at the Samadhi Fire was what caused the Rings to Split and hit Ao Lie.] I was thinking that during the Samadhi fire ritual the egg suddenly started "kicking" and despite his attempts to not let it affect his performance the pain is what causes him to slip, allowing the ring to split. he absolutely blames himself for this.
[By isolating himself, he accidentally causes his body to *turn down the heat* and extend the process even longer.] he's gonna be so mad when he finds out thats one of the reasons it took so long. but maybe it was for the better, with no support group it would have been difficult to raise the egg on his own. the egg was "no troop, these are not prime baby raising conditions, i stay here longer", like giving Wukong time to find a safe and loving situation to give birth in.
[he geniunely believed that keeping MK whilst the Stone Egg was still draining life force could kill the cub. So SWK is forced to give the little toddler up to save his life.] again, as unfortunate as it is, perhaps for the better. even if not being adressed for the right reasons at the time Wukong knew he wasn't in the position to be caring for someone so young at that point, and the fact he took measures to ensure that MK still got a stable and loving home to grow up in says a lot about how even if he couldn't provide for MK he already loved him. the lack of being in the right headspace to care for an infant is also probably another reason for the egg to "turn down the heat", not able to be mentally there for child, child says in womb till he can.
[When him and MK finally reunite, its a little awkward but MK immediately understands the reason for the Monkey King's retirement.] does MK remember Monkey King, or is it a "I just met an actual god/my fav hero of legend and their pregnant" kind of awkward?
[MK, thinking its a bad breakup situation: "oh ok. I guess you're owed some long-overdue paternity leave, huh?"] this is funny if you remember the fact that this likely wouldn't have happened if it weren't for Wukong and Macaque actually having a bad break up, causing Macaque to leave and Wukong to lose the one thing keeping his body from triggering the egg making process. in a way, it is a bad break-up situation, just not exactly in the way MK thinks.
[MK only asks about the schematics on the Egg after Wukong makes a comment about being "like this longer than even Lao Tzu's mother".] Wukong def brags that he's had the longest pregnancy out of any immortal now.
[He returns to Pigsy's that evening silent with a horrifed look on his face.] the rest of the gang notice, they ask, MK explains what Wukong told him, and now everyone is silently horrified for the rest of the night.
[The Spider Queen can sense that theres a new life within the King, but she decides its an issue for after the takeover.] Wukong is kinda surprised when she doesn't instantly try and use it against him, she just responds that she still has some honor. this does not stop her from draining his power though. Wukong's far more concerned about a certain other demoness present learning about his egg...
[DBK frees himself, not only from the fear of losing his wife and his son, but also out of fury that Wukong had been hiding his condition for so long!!] he is not happy to learn that Wukong put his egg at risk with Samadhi fire situation and by fighting him, or that Wukong had hidden it at all from him as his sworn brother. and also with the webs draining Wukong's power it was putting the little one at risk, can't let that happen either, not if he has something to say about. DBK def learns about it because he overhears the deeply concerning conversation between SWK and LBD while their tied up, him being tied up close to Wukong and all.
[PIF demands a proper baby shower when she hears about it from her excited husband later.] PIF sitting at the dinner table, reading a book and eating while she waits for her husband and son to come home: why do I hear loud footsteps getting rapidly closer? DBK busting open the dining room door with Red Son tucked under his arm: DARLING WE'RE GONNA BE GODPARENTS!!!! PIF & Red Son: WHAT? cue a very excited bull king explaining everything to them
[but becomes concerned when his Sun refuses to fight in any way that leaves his stomach exposed.] protecting a specific part of the body usually means there's a vulnerability there, but Wukong didn't fight like he was injured, Macaque knows what that looks like and that wasn't it so now he's confused. the only other kind of vulnrability he could think of invovling one's stomach that would make them seem bloated as well as make them want to get away from the fight as fast as possible is if he was pregnant, but that can't be the case here can it?
["The Shadow Play" becomes more a plan to trap the Monkie Kid gang for answers. MK spills the beans. Macaque stares blankly for a minute before yelling in frustration. It's too much emotional baggage to process right now!] he lays awake for nights on end trying to figure out if its really what he thinks it is with the little evidence he has, and then he just can't take it anymore and sets up the play. trapping the gang in his lantern and threatening MK until he spills, MK does and even though an answer is what he wanted it takes a moment to process that he had been right, then he lashes out when more questions came to mind. how? when? for how long? who's the other parent? MK frees his friends while Macaque is lashing out and they make a break for it, they escape before Macaque can threaten more answers out of them.
[now with the additional threat that she will harm the Stone Egg if Macaque fails her again...] Macaque might not have answers about the egg, but it's still Wukong's egg at the end of the day. sure just the other day he'd been totally fine with the idea of killing the guy but now... was there still hope he could have the life he wanted with his Sun? even if he couldn't he could never bring himself to knowingly harm his former lover's unborn infant. Wukong ofc doesn't know this at first, and gets really worried about Mac getting involved. he doesn't want to have to choose between him and his egg ever again, but he will if he has to. the problem is avoided entirely when (much to SWK's surprise/confusion) Macaque straight up acts like doesn't exist while hunting the gang in s3. for this subtle blessing SWK is relieved and grateful.
[Macaque breaks the King from his possession by casually placing a curious hand on his swollen stomach, smiling in a way Wukong hadn't seen in centuries. "I know," is all that is said as the two monkeys allow their foreheads to touch.] it's such a simple thing, but it's a certain type of soft kindness he hasn't felt in years, that he missed very deeply, the domesticity of it, makes him feel like his moon really is his again. he bursts out crying and almost sends them both to the ground when he collapses into Macaque for a hug.
[LBD is unexpectedly destroyed by the Stone Egg itself. She did not count upon the Egg recognising her as a yummy source of spirtual energy as she was possessing it's parent.] egg was hungry, and SWK was feeling drained after being possessed, LBD was right their and strong and had hurt the egg's parent. so LBD gets nommed on. naturally.
[MK is a little disturbed, but glad that the demoness is gone-gone.] the can't see it happen, but they all feel an absurdly powerful force emanating from SWK suddenly tearing apart and absorbing LBD's soul. everyone's a little shook up by that one. Macaque: did- did the egg just- SWK frozen on spot, with a nervous and tight expression: *exasperated inhale* yeah... everyone else: oh gods there was also a little concern that eating LBD whole soul would have consequences.
[Until the newly unpossessed Monkey King doubles over in pain and cries for the Bodhisattva to help him. Guanyin is on the scene in seconds, glaring at her little brother angrily. Half the gang stare jaws dropped at what is happening while the rest are panicking.] everyone was chilling, settling down and gtting some food after everything, SWK was feeling the most content and happy he had in ages as he refused to anywhere other then glued to Macaque's side, and the egg was like, "I just got a massive meal, and the whole troop is here now, guess it's time to come out now". Wukong surprisingly casually sits up and tells Ne Zha to go get Guanyin, NOW, being the patron god of infants, he quickly realizes whats going on and bolts for the south sea, the others clue in and start freaking out at this point too. Gaunyin is not happy at SWK for putting himself and the egg at risk with both the Samadhi fire (again, they also tried to warn him off it the first time) and with fighting LBD alone, but thats a conversation for after the egg is born, hatched, and healthy. Tang's fanboying over meeting the Guanyin is stifled only by the painc of egg on the way.
[After many hours of painful labor with Macaque clutching his hand for support, Wukong *finally* greets his baby for the first time.] Wukong is def squeezing so hard at one point that Macaque thinks his hand is either gonna break or pop off, it doesn't do either, but it is numb by the end of it. Macaque gladly would do it again if it meant getting to be there when the egg was born and hatched. Wukong def jokingly tells his newborn that she "sure kept them all waiting".
[Her dark fur is hard to ignore. As well as the ice-blue eyes that stare between the two monkeys with wonder. And the little excited chirps she makes that sing the tune of Wukong's favorite songs.] the ice blue eyes are from the last minute bone demon meal ofc, but what if the dark fur actually comes from Wukong's longing to be with macaque as a family again, and those feelings during early pregnancy were so strong it changed the infant's appearence in order to fit not just Wukong but his desires/emotional needs (that being having the family Macaque always wanted with him). Macaque def cries when she has dark fur like him, makes him feel more like he's possibly a bio parent. Wukong is def in love with everything about his little one, down to every little sound she makes. I like to think he would talk to the egg whenever he was alone while pregnant, and was also always humming to them, maybe the infant somehow knows some of those tunes he was humming and tries to mimic them fresh out of the egg.
[Yuebei Xing is celebrated across the many Realms as the first Stone Monkey to be born from a Stone Egg in milennia. Gold Star comes down from Heaven in person to bless her arrival.] they jokingly thank Gold Star for being too busy to oversee Wukong's punishment, because if he had Wukong likely wouldn't be holding the most precious ball of fur in his arms right now.
[singeing Azure Lion's fur as he goes to take the Jade Emperor's throne. All present, including members of the Brotherhood, laugh at the coincidence.] it's hard not to laugh, given the coincidence. the only one not laughing is Azure, who just saw his life flash before his eyes.
[Yuebei's whole family are willing to *destroy* the divine animals if even dare touch a single hair on her little head.] knowing Azure, he's either fantasizing about Yuebei being Wukong and his infant, or plotting how to use her for blackmail. or both. either way Wukong's none too happy to learn who's got their hands on his little one.
[The retrieve Yuebei after they enter the palace and see the three usurpers beaten to a pulp. The infant monkey rolling around on her butt as she giggles. Azure begs the crew to "please take her back".] Azure was perhaps a little too lost in his triumph and day-dreaming to notice the ultra powerful infant he was holding beginning to grow restless and playful, one of his many mistakes. especially seeing as she had little to no strength control at such a young age.
All in reference to the core "slow boiled stone egg au" post.
You did send a less detailed version of this ask a few days ago, I just hadn't gone through my inbox enough XD
I love the detailed responses though! It's nice to see so much interest in my silly aus!
[the morning sickness is def the worst for him.]
Based on my previous ironic pregnancy headcanons, Wukong occasionally gains a food adversion to his fave fruit ever; Peaches. Some days his brain/body just decides "Eww no. bleh. Spit it out right now" and the nausea hits him hard. Wukong is dismayed whenever it happens.
["I am running on 2 hours of sleep, crippling isolation and lonliness, and I haven't been able to keep any food down for three days, I am not in the mood" glare is enough to sen them running for the hills.]
[-this fact breaks Wukong's heart, and it breaks Macaque to when he later learns that was with child the whole time because having a peacful life and a family was all he really ever wanted.]
[the egg was "no troop, these are not prime baby raising conditions, i stay here longer"] + [the lack of being in the right headspace to care for an infant is also probably another reason for the egg to "turn down the heat", not able to be mentally there for child, child says in womb till he can.]
Pretty much yeah!
Stone Monkeys only have this backup for the absolute last resort when things are at their worst enviroment-wise. No mate, no troop, no support system, no mental health = Egg ain't moving. Think of it like the formation of a geode - it can do it either over a natural couple of centuries, or in a few months with intervention.
"Asleep" Stone Monkeys who are still buried know that they're unlikely to ever be recovered, but their egg can still be found by other troops and hatch in response to socialization even thousands of years on.
However, "Awake" Stone Monkeys with an Egg cooking need to have an active support system in place for the baby's development to progress faster/less riskily. By shuting out the outside world, all Wukong did was accidentally set the Egg to "sleep mode".
Sadly, even if Wukong was wrong and his body identified baby!MK harmlessly as a troop member - SWK simply wasn't in the mental headroom to raise a whole baby without someone to help him.
[does MK remember Monkey King, or is it a "I just met an actual god/my fav hero of legend and their pregnant" kind of awkward?]
The second one mostly. MK honestly can't remember his earliest memories beyond the sight of SWK's egg fragment + possibly Nuwa, and thats with supernatural help.
In a slightly sad note, it's possible MK *remembers* being held by someone soft with a round belly + gold eyes. He assumes throughout his life that this person was his birth mother before he was given up/orphaned.
[this likely wouldn't have happened if it weren't for Wukong and Macaque actually having a bad break up]
MK is right in his own way XD
[Wukong def brags that he's had the longest pregnancy out of any immortal now.]
Wukong's been carrying the egg since the Journey days, about the Tang Dynasty (690-907 AD)/irl Xuanzang's departure in 629. So that Stone Egg been slow boiling from anywhere between 1394 to 1116 years. 0_o
Either way SWK has beaten Lao Tzu/Zi's mom (pregnant for 62-80 years), and def brags about that fact to whatever immortal will hear.
[DBK def learns about it because he overhears the deeply concerning conversation between SWK and LBD while their tied up, him being tied up close to Wukong and all.]
DBK overhears LBD making threatening references to Wukong's conditon and immediately interrupts her villainy bs to yell at his sworn brother.
(inside the giant Spider Mech) LBD: "All will fall into place soon. Even with the unexpected additon of your... future heir." *guestures hand around SWK's stomach* DBK, furious ans still wrapped in web: "WHAT!?!? HEIR?! SUN WUKONG!! Are you so reckless that you'd fight even when your unborn child could have been harmed!?" Wukong, wrapped in less-tight web: "Not the best time DBK. I can handle it." LBD: "Quite. Then again it is all in char-" DBKm interrupting: "REALLY BROTHER?! YOU DIDN'T TRUST ME TO KNOW!? If I was aware of your condition - I would have never dared to invoke your anger! Even my beautifully ruthless wife would agree with me!" LBD: *glares at DBK in annoyance* "Ahem." Wukong, ignoring her: "I couldn't let you guys know! Look, I've been fine on own for centuries now!" LBD: "Exc-" DBK, super-concerned: "CENTURIES!?! WERE YOU WITH CHILD DURING THE RITUAL!?!" *DBK busts out of his bindings and gently grabs SWK* DBK: "LADY GUANYIN WILL TAN BOTH OUR HIDES WHEN SHE HEARS ABOUT THIS!" LBD: *gives up and leaves*
[DBK busting open the dining room door with Red Son tucked under his arm: DARLING WE'RE GONNA BE GODPARENTS!!!!]
After the initial shock wears off, PIF immediately summons a catalog to look for baby shower supplies. This is a monumentous occassion! She ofc assumes it's Macaque's fault (she's not wrong XD) and that this might be her future sworn niece/nephew! She simply must organise everything for her idiot sworn brother and his mate!
Red blinks in confusion before confronting the Monkie Kid gang about it later. Mei demands PIF's contact details right that second so that they can swap party ideas.
[even though an answer is what he wanted it takes a moment to process that he had been right, then he lashes out when more questions came to mind. how? when? for how long? who's the other parent?]
Even with knowing how Stone Eggs works, Macaque has such a mental 404 error at the news that he's reduced to yelling garbbled questions at the gang until they leave awkwardly.
[...was there still hope he could have the life he wanted with his Sun?]
Macaque spends most of S3 trying to bat away any thoughts/predictive sounds of a happy domestic life him and Wukong cna have together.
[it's such a simple thing, but it's a certain type of soft kindness he hasn't felt in years, that he missed very deeply, the domesticity of it, makes him feel like his moon really is his again. he bursts out crying and almost sends them both to the ground when he collapses into Macaque for a hug.]
I just love this image. The possession being broken by Macaque expressing softness, his vunerability, to Wukong. And the possessed King snapping out of it since he's so conflcitingly overwhelmed by the joy of having his Moon back again + the weakness he feels.
[egg was hungry, and SWK was feeling drained after being possessed, LBD was right their and strong and had hurt the egg's parent. so LBD gets nommed on. naturally.] + [the can't see it happen, but they all feel an absurdly powerful force emanating from SWK suddenly tearing apart and absorbing LBD's soul. everyone's a little shook up by that one.]
Yuebei's first immortal kill is in fact LBD, preformed before she was even born. Once the switch "flipped" on the possesed SWK, the Egg recognised LBD as both a threat to her parent and a tasty source of Dao, hence; nom-nom-nom.
All thats left behind of the ancient bone demon is a picked-clean skull. The Ten Kings and Yama feel this hungry act from beyond the Realms and wonder *what* creature could have created such a great power vacuum.
[the egg was like, "I just got a massive meal, and the whole troop is here now, guess it's time to come out now".]
Ah, a fellow party crasher, just like her baba. Wukong and Macaque can barely enjoy the bowl of noodles they've stolen (in good humor) from MK when Wukong's face just drops from a shift in his body.
[Tang's fanboying over meeting the Guanyin is stifled only by the painc of egg on the way.]
Tang: "Oh gracious Buddha! The bodhisattva Guanyi herse-- oh gosh this is a lot grosser than I was expecting..." *gets woozy and hides face in Pigsy's chest*
[but what if the dark fur actually comes from Wukong's longing to be with macaque as a family again] + [Macaque def cries when she has dark fur like him, makes him feel more like he's possibly a bio parent]
Oooo! Wukong's emotional need to be reunited with his mate was so great that it impressed upon the Stone Egg itself.
Imagine how much crying would be involved if little Yuebei just so happened to be born six-eared as well? Macaque and Wukong would never stop sobbing over how cute their baby is!!
Macaque is still very much assumed by the demonic/celestial/mortal public not in the know of Stone Eggs, to be Yuebei's other bio parent. Hard to refute their claims when the little Monkey Princess has such lovely midnight-dark fur and glowing ears.
[I like to think he would talk to the egg whenever he was alone while pregnant, and was also always humming to them, maybe the infant somehow knows some of those tunes he was humming and tries to mimic them fresh out of the egg.]
Thats so super adorable I love it! <3
Wukong loved talking to the Egg when he was on his own on the island. He'd talk to it about what his old Pilgrim brothers were like, what happened in Heaven, his early days on the mountain, and how much he wishes to be there to see all the little havoc's she'll cause in the future. He def recorded a tape + wrote letters to Yuebei before she was born ala "For Steven" in Steven Universe... just in case his immortality didn't work in the end.
Babies can hear things going on on the outside irl as early as 14 weeks along - it's how they become acclimated to the voices of their family. Little Yuebei spent so much time in the "final run" hearing show tunes, action movies, and the voices of Wukong's new found family/troop that she thinks theses are all "good noises"!
As Yuebei looks around at her "troop" she tries matching a "good sound" to them. Everyone is just aww-ing at her tiny chirping mimicry, and burst out laughing when she gets to Pigsy and makes a deep sound they swear sounds like "freeloader!".
Her pre-natal eavessdropping does however, lead her to fall asleep to the heavy metal soundtrack of the Monkey Cop series. XD
[Azure was perhaps a little too lost in his triumph and day-dreaming to notice the ultra powerful infant he was holding beginning to grow restless and playful, one of his many mistakes. especially seeing as she had little to no strength control at such a young age.]
Yuebei decided that "Kitty" wasn't playing with her, wasn't holding her right, and wasn't even singing to her! And she wanted to make her frustrations known.
I love these mass responses, even if it takes some time for me to reply. Ty so much for your interest!
#slow boiled stone egg au#stone egg talk#pregnancy au#lmk aus#sun wukong#six eared macaque#liu er mihou#shadowpeach#lmk#lego monkie kid#long post#gif warning#yuebei xing#lmk yuebei xing
79 notes
·
View notes
Text
⚠️Does contain The Sun and The Star spoilers so continue at your own risk!!!⚠️
I don’t know when Will Solace became one of my favourite Percy Jackson characters but it probably has something to do with the fact that he’s one of those characters that’s deeply traumatised but everyone forgets about it
So (for some reason) i’m gonna sit here and list everything my man’s been through:
At ten years old he and his mother got attacked by Stymphalian birds, found by his satyr and taken to camp halfblood where he, at some point, became a year round camper
He admits that his mother, despite his love for her, could be quite neglectful during her time on tour and he grew to live with it but now he’s scared of being abandoned
Between the ages of 10-12 he’s training to be a field medic in camp
Had to watch his friends and family switch sides to fight against them and probably had to watch them die throughout the course of the books (it’s mentioned that there’s countless demigods deaths from Kronos’ side during the battles)
At 13/14 he fights in a battle to defend his home where his brother, Lee Fletcher, dies along with many other campers including some from the Apollo cabin
Within the same battle he probably has to heal many of his friends as well as watch them die as he believes he ‘fails’ to heal them
At 14 he fights in The Battle of Manhattan where it’s believed the Apollo cabin suffers the most fatalities (four documented, however I remember seeing somewhere that the cabin was practically empty due to fatalities and switching sides by the end of the series)
During the battle he heals Annabeth, which drains most of his energy, he creates a field hospital on Olympus to heal other campers and he becomes head counsellor of the Apollo cabin as Michael Yew was never found after the bridge collapse.
Fought in another battle literally less than a year after the last one and delivered a baby mid way through at the age of 14/15, had two entire camps full of children depending on his skills as the head healer
Watched Octavian willingly hurtle himself to his death and believes he ‘let’ him do it even after being ashamed that he’s related to Octavian.
Let himself be a distraction for six guards that would have happily either killed him or captured him
Spent his days after the battle with Gaea in the infirmary healing other campers, or watching them suffer through injuries they would ultimately not recover from
Has his father just fuckin plummet to earth and pitch up at camp as an egotistical teenager after his own powers were going mental and camp was falling into disarray because Apollo was no longer an Olympian throughout
Has to help his father complete his quests and heal other injured campers during fights and battles all whilst trying to make sure his boyfriend and his father don’t do anything stupid and die
Finally gets a break at camp with his boyfriend with no other campers and gets a prophecy that insinuates that he will have to go to the depths of tartarus which could either drive him insane or just straight up kill him off and be abandoned there
Goes on said quest and before they’ve even gotten into tartarus he’s passed out 3 times, is the colour of literal wax and has wounds that have just randomly opened up on his body after collapsing on a hill of what’s described as glass shards and rolling down.
is plagued by nightmares, gets drawn in by voices of tormented, pain ridden souls and loses his one source of light that’s keeping his barely sane
Comes to the realisation that he cannot heal everything and that not everything needs to be healed. That his boyfriend has dark parts that Will may not like but that’s okay and they can learn to live with those parts of eachother
(i fully believe that, if it came to it, despite his objections, he would have sacrificed himself to stay in tartarus if it meant Nico and Bob got out alive)
I know many people love to talk about Nico’s trauma and honestly fair enough cause his trauma is deep and horrific and he deserves to heal and be happy and his trauma should never be overlooked
however i will never miss an opportunity to bring up will solace and talk about the shit he’s been through
#the sun and the star spoilers#the sun and the star#rick riordan#will solace#nico di angelo#pjo will#pjo nico#bob the titan#small bob#iapetus#mark oshiro#percy jackson#annabeth chase#grover underwood#spoilers#tsats spoilers#tsats
78 notes
·
View notes
Text
CHAPTER 1
Pairing: Christopher Bahng x Aubrey Williams (OC)
Warnings: none for this chapter, smut eventually
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
"Thank you. Have a nice day!" I smile as I hand a bag filled with books to a customer. They smile and exit the store. I glance at the clock on the wall. Damn, I missed lunch again and it was almost time to go home. I pick up some books that needed to be put back on the shelves and head to the back of the store. My phone vibrates and I fish it out from the back of my jeans pocket.
T: when will you be home?
A: why?
T: my mom got you some teas that will help with getting you pregnant.
I wanted to run away this moment. Troy had been trying to get me pregnant for almost 2 years now. We had tried every treatment there is out in the world. It always ended up with negative pregnancy tests. And his mom even suggested surrogacy or he sleep with another woman. And I was always the one in the middle forced to do things I didn't want to do.
Once, she put some medicine in my food and 2 hours later the same night I ended up in the hospital with severe vomitting. The doctor told Troy to not do anything drastic like that or I will lose my life. But that didn't stop his mom. She complained how her friends were already grandmothers when she's not. She had hated me from the beginning and we never got along despite Troy knowing everything. He was a mama's boy. He managed to swipe me off my feet and made me fall in love with him.
I wrap up in my book store, lock the main door and put alarms on. The drive home was the only relaxing time I had which didn't last long since it was only a 20 minute drive. Parking in the driveway, I put my poker face and head inside. Troy was on his laptop typing away and only turned around when I walk inside. "Mom wants us to come over for dinner this Saturday. I told her we'll come."
"Okay," I say, feeling drained from the day. I head into our room to change so I could finally eat. I'm in the middle of changing clothes when I suddenly feel a pair of arms slide around my exposed waist. I gasp, jumping a little. "Troy, what are you doing?"
"Come on, baby. It's been a long time," Troy whispers as he unclisps my bra as his other hand slips under my yoga pants, slipping a finger inside me. "Let's make a baby."
I groan mentally. If only there was a way....
------------------------------------------------------------
The 'session' ended as usual like last time. Him leaving me high and dry to mend to myself. Sex with Troy was a chore now. It always was. As I finish changing, my phone vibrates and I smile when I see the text from my best friend, Liana.
L: girlie, what are you doing this weekend?
A: dinner at mother in law on saturday.
L: ew, you're still married?
A: lol, yes. And on sunday, I have to work.
L: at this rate, you're gonna be old before you know it.
A: gee, thanks.
L: listen, there's a party next weekend that i really wanna go to
A: let me guess. You want to go because the bartender that you've been crushing on is going?
L: great mind think alike. Also! Chris will be there!
Chris? Now why does that name sound so familiar? I go to type back but my stomach growling stops me. I'll send her a text later. I head to the kitchen and fix myself a quick sandwich with potato chips and a can of pepsi. I felt content finally being able to eat. It was one of the things I always loved. I loved all types of food, especially homemade. It was one of the things I always loved. Cooking. It was therapeutic for me since I came from a family who taught each other many things. And I was very glad that my mom taught me how to cook various types of food growing up.
Finishing up in the kitchen, I head up to my study to work on some book covers. I immerse myself in the work and loose track of time until I'm finished with 2 projects. As I walk to the bedroom, I see Troy already sleeping. Lucky bastard sleeping with no care in the world. I lay down and settle myself for sleep. Only it comes much later and the next thing I know is my alarm clock going off on my phone.
As much as I wanted to sleep more, the bookstore had to be opened today as there were deliveries coming in and an investor that I wasn't told much about. I hadn't told Troy about it yet because I know what he will say about it. 'Just sell it to me.' He had said it to me many times and I had declined every time since I had put my time and sweat into the bookstore while he worked for a big corporation company called Bahng/Lee Corp. The only thing I knew about the company was that it was 2 cousins who owned it.
------------------------------------------------------------
I got coffee on the way to open the bookstore. Flipping the lights on, my co workers start walking in. "Morning, Aubrey."
I smile at Sabrina and Penelope. "Morning." They go back in the break room while I start assembling books in the shelves. I loved the feeling of new and old books. It gave me a sense of bliss and calmness in both. A few customers come and go, purchasing books and other accessories. And just like that a few hours go by and it's lunch time. "Hey, I'm gonna quickly head out to grab lunch and I'll be back to help with the deliveries."
I quickly get a italian sub from next door and as soon as I get back, the delivery truck arrive. While Sabrina helps the driver unload the boxes, Penelope and I immediately start unboxing them, my lunch long forgotten. It tends to get hectic and a lot busy once I get new releases come in. I'm inside unboxing another box when Troy and his mom, Georgia walk in.
"This place is a mess," Georgia says as she swipes off imaginary dust from her shoulder.
"Hi, Georgia," I say, nervous all of a sudden.
"Aubrey, what's all this?" Troy asks glancing at the boxes around me. Honestly, I have told him many times and yet he still asks.
"New books and accessories," I reply.
"More books?" Georgia blinks at the bunch of books in my hands. "If only you spent as much time you did on giving me grandkids as you did on books, maybe you wouldn't have to work as much."
I open my mouth to reply when Troy speaks. "Mom's right. All you've been doing is working ever since your parents dumped this shop on you."
This book shop was given to me by my parents on my 23rd birthday since they know how much I love books. It also meant I was the only sole owner of it and this didn't sit well with Georgia. As for Troy, he didn't really care or paid much attention to it which I was kind of glad for. I sigh looking at them. Georgia with her gold jewlery and the usual french manicure that she gets every 2 weeks. And Troy in his usual business attire with his blackberry in hand, typing away.
The amount of degrading I have listened from both of them these past 2 years. I always want to give them a piece of my mind. But for some reason, I always keep my mouth shut. "Thank you for being so considerate. I will keep it in mind." I had gotten my period in the morning and I was starting to think I wasn't the problem. How I knew that is because everytime Troy and I were intimate on the days I was ovulating, all the pregnancy tests turned out to be negatives, no matter how many times I took them.
"So, when do I get to hear the good news?" Is she being for real right now?
"Soon, mom. Soon." And he's not helping either.
The amount of things I wanted to say to both of them right this moment. But it wasn't the place or time. "Is she taking the teas I gave you?" Those teas I threw some away already because they were gnarly and tasted like her vegetable casserole. "Well, I've been waiting for 2 years. She should've been able to pop atleast one baby out. Did you guys get tested right? Is it her? It's her, isn't it?"
"Georgia-"
She points her finger at me, nostrils flaring. "I knew it! I knew you were trouble the moment he brought you to my house. Troy shouldn't have gotten with you in the first place!"
"Mom-"
"No! I'm not going to shut up just because I'm in her stupid bookshop!" Georgia was fuming, her face turning red. This had happened before last year when I showed her the negative pregnancy tests. And now it was happening again. A few customers and Sabrina was staring at us now. "I told you she was bad news! And now she's unable to give you a baby!"
I watch as Troy tries to calm her down. Penelope nudges me with her elbow. I turn to look at her. "What?"
"There's someone asking for you."
"Who?" I ask. I turn my head when she points towards the door. My breathing stops. A black haired man wearing beige cardigan with blue jeans walks towards to where we're all standing. Everyone, including Georgia and Troy watch as he stands in front of where Penelope and I are standing, behind the cash regsiter. I survey him from top to bottom. I notice he's also wearing small silver hoop earrings which I think he's probably the only man to pull it off. And did I mention he's gorgeous?
"I'm looking for Aubrey Williams." Oh thank god, I didn't change my name when I got married.
"I'm Aubrey. How can I help you?"
He blinks at me. "You're Aubrey?" His voice was smooth like caramel melting in your mouth, with a hint of an accent?
"Yes." I get confused when he lets out a small laugh. "I'm sorry, but who are you?"
"Me?" He smiles as he hands me a business card. My eyes widen at the name written on it and look up at him, smiling at me.
"Chris?" Holy shit. It's him.
"Ah, so she does remember me." He smiles. Holy dimples.
"Babe, who's this?" Troy comes in view and I can't form any words. Georgia is watching all this unfold, arms crossed looking like a Karen. I almost want to laugh.
"Uh, this is Chris. An old high school friend." I reply. "And this,' I point to Troy. "This is my husband, Troy."
"Pleasure to make your acquaintance," Chris stated, raising his hand which Troy shakes, much to my surprise. "Didn't know you were married."
"For 5 years," Troy announces with a frown.
"Oh my god, is that Christopher Bahng?"
"That's Chris Bahng! I've always seen him in magazines but he's more handsome in person!"
"He's so handsome!"
A few customers take out their phones and start taking pictures, while many start pointing at him. I watch as Troy's eyes widen as Georgia rolls her eyes and grabs his arms, dragging him out. I don't think I've seen Troy like that in front of anyone before. He was always the one confronting others whereas I hated it. "You sure do know how to pick 'em," Chris says, chuckling.
"Bri," Penelope nudges me in again, whispering in my ear. "He's one of the owners of Bahng/Lee Corp."
Then it clicks. He's the investor. "So you're here to invest in this bookshop? Why?"
"Well, I've been hearing many things about it so thought I'd check it out."
Sabrina is now standing with Penelope, staring at Chris with a stupid smiles on their faces. "Let me show you around." I drop a box in their hands as I walk around them, their eyes following Chris behind me. Why did I have to hire women with hormones?
"So right here we keep the fiction and fantasy books, our most favourite section that gets sold out pretty quickly," I stated, standing between the shelves and watch as he observes some books.
"How many days are you open?"
"7 days but weekends have different hours and even open on holidays," I nervously reply.
"Open on holidays?" He asks, surprised. "You don't take time off?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"Books make me happy." I wanted to say otherwise.
"But not your husband?" He asks, finally looking at me.
"What? I didn't say that," I denied. "I meant I like being here, it gives me peace."
"The peace that your mother-in-law demanding a baby from you?" My eyes widen at his statement. He heard that? "Yeah, I heard some of it."
"Oh." I had nothing else to say because my brain only saw one thing. The beautiful man in front of me. Plus, he didn't need to know about my life.
"I'll do it."
I do a double take. "Pardon me?"
"I'll invest in your bookshop and expand it. Maybe open more branches in different locations," he replies.
Wait a damn minute. Am I hearing this right? "Wait, are you serious?"
He chuckles. "Yes. Is it that hard to believe?"
"Well, for one you didn't even see the rest of the shop."
He gives me a smile that made me weak in the knees. "I don't need to. I know you will do great as you are currently doing."
"Thank you."
He glances at his wrist watch. "I gotta go, Bri. I have an important I need to get to. I'll need to get in touch with you for all the paperwork."
"But I don't have your number." Ah. Why....."Ah, I'm sorry. How rude of me."
He laughs. "You're the same as ever. You have my card, all my contact information is on there."
"Oh, right."
He lets out a small laugh. "I'll wait for your text or call, whichever you prefer is fine with me." He winks at me, smiling. Oh god, those dimples again. And then he walks out the shop, disappearing around the corner. I glance at his card in my hand and smile.
A/N: this is a completed series i did on wattpad so decided to show its love on here. Enjoy and stay delulu friends
#bang chan#christopher bang#stray kids bang chan#chris bang#stray kids#skz#bang chan fanfic#bang chan skz#bang chan smut
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Hey everyone, so sorry posting has been a little wonky lately. I'm honestly thinking of taking a mini hiatus. I'm gonna try to get requests done but it'll be a slow process. My mental health has gone down the drain a bit and I have been losing joy in some fandoms. I feel like my work is going down the tubes. I'm still happy to chat with my mutuals and doing projects with them if they'd like. I won't be completely gone from here. I hope everyone can understand and be supportive. Thank you. ❤️
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
There is a post going around on twitter talking about what Viv says about Alastor's smile. I am going to leave out everyone's talk about it being about Vox because that isn't my focus on this. Though, it does play a part. What got me was that she says its a 'very self enforced form of ego'
Meaning he does it to himself. He sees a frown as weakness, getting someone to lose their smile means the game is over. the jig is up. its serious now. That for Alastor is a win. And its fascinating to me that people just write it off as a 'oh Vox is a walking temper tantrum' for shits and giggles and yeah it can be, but the way there's so much more underneath it? That's the real juicy stuff for me. Both Alastor and Vox are in the entertainment industry. We all know how toxic that kind of lifestyle is. Everyone is all up in your business. You have to adhere to people's view of you.
Vox is fucking drained. The way he comes up from his evil lair, to his photo of him smiling but when the doors open he's frowning, before he's inhaling and putting on a smile like everything's fine. They are the lie we tell ourselves. How we appear composed when really we're fucking screaming on the inside.
When I think about Alastor stitches being his own doing? I'm fascinated by that. It means he refuses to let anyone get the best of him, they could never get under his skin if he physically cannot frown. It's why he's so indifferent, why he's so unbothered. He's always smiling. It doesn't matter what he's feeling on the inside because so long as no one can see, he still has the upper hand.
I keep thinking about how he and his mother had to deal with a lot of shit. The people in power, like to make those they think are beneath them feel strong. Oppression, violence, kicking them down when they are already on the floor. All I can hear is the phrase 'don't let them see you frown' and Alastor taking it personally. Alastor echoing it inside his head like a mantra. For every disgusting, racist comment. Don't let them see you frown. For every insult, don't let them see you frown. For every time they try and see you fail, don't let them see you frown. Because the second they do? They win. You give them power over you and that is something Alastor refuses to let anyone have over him.
People don't talk about how hard it is being a person of color, especially back then yes but I also relate to having to always be perfect. Growing up we get told to never draw attention to ourselves. Act like the white people. Keep your head low. This kind of thinking is why so many latinos are oddly republican because they get told to act like something aren't and then forget where they came from. It's pressure to perform, to be the best and doing it the right way so you aren't judged.
Can't do a bad thing ever because then it just proves that oooh all of us colored people are as bad as they say. I have this thought on things even if its not my fault? Like if I'm in a hurry and I don't open the door for the white people coming out. Or the way, the elevator the other day already had six people in it and three white ppl saw it and decided they were gonna squeeze themselves in anyway. but I swear you reverse it and someone would have said something. its having to watch what we say, having to not sound too much like where we come from. SMILE AND JUST PUSH THROUGH IT. When we really just want to fucking be angry.
This is why I think Alastor refuses for society to whip him into shape. Why he smiles, why he shoves all his anger down into the pit of his belly and only releases it when he's killing someone who probably fucking deserves it. I think Vox shows us the version of us when we're all depressed and searching for that dopamine hit, but the reality is we're all drained physically and mentally because of this persona we put on. Alastor is the twisted, darker side of that. the kind that wants to act on it. the repression, the internalized anger from not being able to express himself the way he should. alastor is a hypocrite himself. calling vox out for being fake, he is exactly the same way. he's just much better at hiding it.
#⌜the secret memoirs of a serial killer⌟ . // headcanons#tw racism#tw murder#I HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABOUT HIM OKAY
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
PICK A CARD - GENERAL
My first post… enjoy the last day of 2022.
Pick a pile from 1-4.
(Pictures credit unknown)
Pile 1:
I feel like this pile goes through phases of feeling motivated and then almost utterly hopeless, maybe even end up spending the whole day in bed due to overthinking… some of you might even be under or overeating due to this. I’m getting at this time it’s very important to take care of your mental health because it might be affecting your guts or nervous system… you can reach burnout as well. Some of you might’ve even recently been in a manic state almost, ups and downs, crashing hard. This is my pile that might have high hopes and dreams, you might already romanticize your life or grew up thinking like that, maybe even was a maladaptive daydreamer… but I’m getting due to trauma, low self esteem, or being in the wrong environment and/or crowd you might like I said go back to feeling utterly hopeless. I’m getting a vision of somebody at a party… it’s almost like everybody sees the spark and potential in them and they’re standing somewhere alone downing a bottle or smoking. Pile 1 I’m getting you might make people around you feel hopeful or give them this “spark” where they see life in its beauty and color once again while people are you make you feel hopeless, so you could have a lot of energy vampires or “lose souls” around you and I’m getting it’s draining to you. I’m getting another vision of you guys sitting on a bed… the scene makes me feel exhausted, like something bad just happened or I just reminisced on the past, maybe cried my eyes out and then just lay there numb unable to “care” to do anything. The advice for you is to do something new in a new environment, right now you need that fresh perspective but it has to be from a new experience pile 1, you’re not gonna get that refreshing feeling from being in that same room or around those same people and for some of you I heard “trap house” so you might be staying in a trap house… and I’m getting the message of if this is the case these are probably acquaintance or friends.. not family. Pile 1 I’m also getting somebody around you that you can put your trust in but you seem to be pushing them away… maybe try going to them for advice or doing a activity together, they’ll be reaching out soon so you’ll know who it is, they might have something to tell you rather than a casual conversation. This conversation might make you emotional? It could be a case of getting emotional and it doesn’t even have anything to do with what you’re getting emotional over. Last hint about this person is they like the color red. You’re going to be okay not only due to your strength and ability to regenerate but because I see you always had a sense of self preservation that protects you… even when you’re being reckless I’m hearing! Lol. This might be my witchy pile as well. Last message because I didn’t mean to make it this long is you give off a manic pixie girl vibe off to a-lot of people. Extra: feeling abandoned, spending birthday alone vibes, crying till you can’t no more, charms, shaking hands, party, intent, New Years kiss, sports, guitar, running, coffee shop, new iPad??, shaking hands with the devil, therapist, weed, sex, city, cleanse, mental illness.
Pile 2:
Now i usually encourage people not to think of the past but pile 2 I’m getting you need to dig deep and remember memories and times where you were at your most powerful and empowered. You need to remember what that feels like and embody that energy, it’s almost like somewhere along the way you let somebody strip you of your identity I’m hearing or “distract” you from who you are?? I’m also getting some of you might’ve felt like a poser regarding something you did majority of your life or at a young age. Pile 2 do you have people toying with your mind or putting you down and feeding you negative ideologies about yourself? If so, please cut that bullshit off now. You deserve so much better, I gotta remind this pile to not settle for less. Also I’m getting that you might downplay your energy a lot to make people around you more comfortable and I’m gonna have to ask you to cut that off as well (maybe some of you have Scorpio/Plutonian/Martian energy here, intense and uncomfortable). I also think some of you almost feel insulted reading this pile because you got this hard exterior and might even be in denial, “I would never let somebody take away who I am or toy with me”, I understand that I really do but I think you sometimes do so for the comfort or sake of others because it almost seems like the easy route or not having to deal with others. I’m only mentioning this because the themes popping up here are almost things that you might think only “weak” people deal with and this pile energy is very fierce & out there, definitely not the type to back down from a fight. This is because you’re the type that likes to deal with your shit alone pile 2, this is a admirable trait but I’m everybody needs a community. I’m also getting your soul family and future community will be stronger than ever, almost like a pact, literally. Spirit wanted some of you to know that because you might’ve gotten so use to doing this alone you accepted this is just how life is meant to be but that’s not true. Get out there and be yourself pile 2 so you can attract the right people for you, this might not be immediate but you could end up in a certain environment, wether a job or a party or college “group” I’m hearing that could put you around the people you’re suppose to be working with in this lifetime. Another thing is scripting right now will do wonders for you when it comes to manifesting, check the alignments and especially where mercury is transiting in your chart because I’m seeing this is the most powerful manifesting technique at this time. Some of you will be going home to visit or moving out from where you currently live, if that doesn’t resonate then you will be visiting a old hometown or just reconnecting with your origins. Extra: goth, assassin, creatures, swimming in the deep end, activist, guns, flowers, bikes, pretty eyes, tea, ocean, fashion industry, travel, musician, warmth.
Pile 3:
For this pile I’m getting a lighter energy! This might be my dualistic people, people might say you have two sides to you… are you a Gemini or Pisces pile 3? Just like pile 1 I’m getting people view you in a dreamy manner… you seem different to a lot of people and this might make them curious about you or wanna learn from you. You might even be in a environment opposite to you, wether this is cultural beliefs or race or gender… something about you stands out, this could even just be your personality. You might even have heavy Jupiterian/Sagittarius energy in your chart. I see you don’t dwell over things for too long and if you do, it damn sure doesn’t show. I don’t blame people for wanting to learn off of you because I get one of the things you constantly wanna do is learn or find a way to help yourself out. You might even consume too much information at once and overwhelm yourself. This is my thinkers pile! (Makes sense I said Gemini as that’s mercurial energy). Despite you being so logical I see you have big dreams pile 3, for some of you in particular you got a certain long term goal or one that takes a long time, this could be career related. Spirit wants you to know this is something you will accomplish within this lifetime but the timeline with which you do depends on you. The longer you doubt yourself or waste time participating in activities that move you further from your goal the longer it will take. I’m hearing take a step forward and you will see signs to guide you to the next step. I’m also hearing you might feel scattered this time around, the holidays and a new year might have you anxious about the future or simply overwhelmed. You could possibly even be trying to balance out multiple plans or coming to a final decision. I’m also picking up on the energy of somebody that misses you and been overthinking about you, this could be vise versa. This is either a relationship from the past or something you’ll be yet to experience. This person might be toxic and fuck with your intuition or pull you away from your spirituality but it was destined to happen. Through this person I’m seeing you will experience things you couldn’t have without them (or this already happened) and you will meet & interact with people that will take you through the next phase in life. Maybe literally or trigger this awakening or passion within you. I’m also getting this partnership this will make you more brave & confident… this is going to bring you a lot of emotional fulfillment & material abundance. This is the pile I feel like already knows what’s going on but maybe stuck in some sort of rut, you might be doing things but you feel it doesn’t align with your life purpose… where you’re going is changing all of that. I’m getting to focus on the present pile 3 and you will get confirmation when you’re on the right path or not, trust your gut. You’re intuition is strong and your power is felt by those around you. I’m also getting you should start doing tarot readings so if you been contemplating this is your sign! This could also be a future profession for you. Your word is powerful pile 3, be careful what you say or affirm. You might even be able to seduce people with your voice… can you sing pile 3? Singing will also be very healing to you at this time.
Pile 4:
Some of you might be going through addiction pile 4… it’s interesting because you guys I heard are alchemist and breadwinners, just like this. You might use drugs to cope with sadness & stress. But I’m also getting for a few of you somebody else can be putting some type of spell on you or if you don’t think anybody would go that far maybe just sending you evil eye. Im getting 2 scenarios - this is either a immature fire sign (or just aggressive, lustful, action oriented, impulsive) masculine that’s attempting to put love spells on you or this might be a 3rd party situation (your current spouse ex, or ex’s ex, or ex’s current partner, possibly their family) However I feel like you’re protected from this it’s just draining your energy and you might not be on your protection like you usually are. Take some cleansing baths please pile 4! I’m also getting changing your diet right now would help you physically & mentally in a immense way. If you’re being over generous with your money or material please cut that out as well because I see you could’ve progressed past where you are right now if it wasn’t for leeches around you. I would just keep an eye for anybody trying to cause you a tower moment - or this could be a tower moment that already happened and somebody is gossiping/running their mouth. I wouldn’t give it too much attention pile 4. I feel like you’re somebody that’s too concerned with other shit to let something like this bother you too much, maybe you’re just curious. I’m also seeing a lot of you might have a resting bitch face or being very unimpressed with people lol. Another thing that came up I wanna touch on before I forget (because for some reasons your messages are coming up fast and scattered) is that you might had a hard time concentrating, are you overthinking? Do you possibly have adhd? Are you spending more time on your phone then you should? I think this is also part of the reason you could be encouraged to go on that clean eating diet pile 4, it might be to rebuild your discipline back in life. Sometimes I feel like this pile may feel they’re “drifting with the wind”. You guys might be very sarcastic or snappy but I see it comes from a place of being fed up with society and just tired of the world in general and for that I’m sorry pile 4, I wanna give you a hug. Spirit wants to assure you that nothing people throw your way out of malice can hurt you if you don’t let it. You’re being encouraged to find what you love again in life and what makes you feel good about waking up everyday again. If you have responsibilities you gotta tend to that you don’t enjoy, don’t forget to take that time out for yourself! You guys might overwork yourself or overextend and don’t have time for your own projects. You could be traveling alot in 2023 so that’s a plus pile 4. Keep working on self love and self care, you’re meant to be more selfish right now and even for the next whole year. If you been feeling that energy this is your go! Your spirit team is proud of you and you will be getting rewarded heavily in 2023, you will be serene and at peace with yourself and whatever your doing. This pile is going to find balance which is beautiful. Last message is about you holding a lot of secrets and even magic I’m hearing, so take that how you will.
127 notes
·
View notes
Note
Happy STS! But oh no! One of your characters has been stabbed! What chaos does this bring about? Who's been stabbed, who did the stabbing, who yanks the sword out without thinking, etc.? ♥️
Just for the sake of chaos… I’m gonna say, Benjamin Fisher. Or, vampire and slow corruption arc Benjamin Tallmadge from TURN: Washington’s Spies. Not just stabbed, Ben’s favourite horse was shot from under him and he lays dying on the battlefield, in Yorktown, Virginia, in 1781. The date is October 1st, 1781, the siege is halfway over and the Americans are winning. It is pure bad luck.
Audrey would simply say, “No good deed goes unpunished.”
Audrey screams. Audrey tries real hard not to have a mental breakdown. Audrey swore she’d never turn him. But this isn’t fair to either of them, and the war is not over, Benjamin insisted on finishing what he started. Ethics and future consequences can go to hell. He may hate her for this, but this is bigger than either of them at this point…
Audrey stops hesitating. Like a French Valkyrie come to judge the worthy, she rides out to where Benjamin lays dying.
Audrey doesn’t need to drain him, the bullet and the redcoats blade did that just fine.
Moments before Ben is “lost”, just enough to briefly glimpse the other side, who knows what he sees, Audrey doesn’t believe in heaven or hell, she is an atheist, for now.
Benjamin is turned into a vampire in a last ditch attempt (though hypocritical) by Audrey to not lose him. The war doesn’t end until 1783, America wins. To the shock of the 18th century world stage, it only took 5 years of war and French support. (naval blockade in the West Indies and a sea battle in India, which America wins).
Benjamin asks himself: “what is the cost of my soul?”
Note: this is just basically Fisher’s origin story, or how he got vampirism. I have no intention of ending this fic, that way. I may be a morally complex bi, but, Benjamin Tallmadge would have a religious Protestant mental breakdown if that happened. Yay for original characters!
#meera answers#toribookworm22#sts ask#answered#oc: Benjamin fisher#oc: audrey#benjamin tallmadge#ben tallmadge#au: vampire#Ben x oc#canon x oc#fisher x Audrey#meera.musings#vampires#turn: washington's spies#turn washington's spies#amc turn#turn amc#18th century#american revolution#writing historical fiction#writing horror#gothic horror#long post#long post tw#religion cw#war cw#death cw
10 notes
·
View notes
Note
ever since i saw that performance video of johnny poll dancing, i keep thinking of him at a playground at those polls where you’re supposed to slide down on lmao
Hiii, oh my gosh I love that so much I need to see that, I love seeing them play on playgrounds its so cute I just want a vlog where they're doing nothing but playing at a playground and having lunch just super wholesome sweet activities. I want more unstructured chill vlogs those are just always my faves.
Okay so this is last time I mention boyfriend promise but last night we were talking about weight cause his grandma gets on him about being too thin. And I said as long as you feel okay than that's all that really matters and just do what feels best and I brought up how even though I'm plus size when I go to the doctor she tells me my blood work is perfect and she hasn't ever suggested I lose weight after my first visit only to at most maintain my weight and she just tells me I need to eat more and he said "you really do" and I said but its so much work and after taking care of my aunt I don't have the energy to cook most days and he said "well someone has to cook for you and I'll do it" and he's so sweet and I'm getting a little better at eating but he's really so sweet.
Also while I'm here i love the Just Trish podcast but every episode they talk negatively about their bodies and I just can't watch it for my mental well-being. I can only finish interview episodes. For me I never wanted to be skinny the first woman I saw as absolutely beautiful was my 4th grade teacher who was really tall, plus size and super pear shaped and to me I thought she was the ideal and I realized in 11th grade i never hated body I hated the way I was treated because of it. I'm actually so happy i grew into a tall plus sized pear shaped woman (not super pear shaped maybe one day) and constantly hearing that negative body image it's so draining to hear and honestly so annoying that I just skip those episodes entirely its always the ones with Trish and Oscar so I just watch the ones with Trish and a guest instead. Okay I feel like this is my first time in a while, i just kept yappin so I'm gonna stop here sorry for the paragraphs.
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
⛓
have some more fyi au c!loudduo !! these guys are fucked UP in this au. seriously fucked up. have some relationship exploration
warnings: relationship + mental deterioration, toxic relationship, torture, injury, abuse, prison themes
“Dream, oh my God, the election is in an hour and you’re not even fucking rea— What the fuck happened to your tie?!”
Dream blinks earnestly down at it. “What do you mean?” He protests. “It’s tied. Like you said.”
“Yeah, in the ugliest fucking knot on the planet. Come here.” Before he can object, Dream finds himself being fussed over by Quackity, the younger yanking at his tie with lighthearted force. Dream usually shoves his friends off when they fuss over him, but he can sense Quackity needs a distraction, so stands still as patiently as he can, letting the younger retie his tie and making resigned eye contact with a smirking George who mouths good luck idiot in a way that makes him smile under the mask. He’s buzzing with nerves — he and Quackity are — but the friendly physical touch is doing a little to calm him.
“There,” Quackity says, satisfied at last and stepping back, “oh my God, we literally would’ve lost the election if you’d shown up like that. And we’re not gonna lose. You understand me?”
Dream is caught off guard by the passion of his running partner’s words. “Yes, sir,” he says, mischievously.
It’s a bit of a risk. Quackity is high-strung as it is, and Dream isn’t sure whether his playful nickname will be taken as an insult or not. But Quackity squawks with laughter, clapping a hand over his mouth, and the tension drains out of his shoulders, and the look on his face grows positive.
“That’s the fucking spirit! I like that, I like that energy!” The younger heads for the door, sending Dream a grateful grin. “Let’s go kick their asses!”
—
“I’m sick and tired of you always going against me!” Quackity explodes four months later, fiery tempered and ill with stress. It’s winter now, cold and frosty, and Dream feels nothing but cool ice inside him as he stares at his old friend. “It feels like every fucking decision I make, you’re undermining it! I stood by you about exile, even though I really didn’t fucking want it — so why are you constantly going against me?”
Dream says nothing. His lips press together in a hard line.
“Talk to me,” Quackity demands, “and while you’re fucking at it, explain where you’ve been for the past two days. You know, the two days you promised to help me with celebration plans.”
Unclenching his jaw, Dream works for a level voice. He can’t very well say the truth: that it had taken him two days to meticulously scatter Tommy’s beach party invited far enough away that nobody would ever find them. “I’ve been with Tommy,” he says at last, voice calm, controlled despite his bubbling irritation and tiredness, “look, I should’ve told you, but my work is important too. My goals—”
“Your fucking goals,” Quackity mutters, turning away and pressing his fingers to his forehead, “it’s always about you and your fucking goals, isn’t it, Dream. It’s funny, ‘cause our goals are supposed to line up with the country. That’s why you’re my Vice. Right?”
Dream doesn’t know how to tell him he’s fallen out of love with L’Manburg — doesn’t know how to tell him that L’Manburg is rotten and needs to be destroyed, doesn’t know how to tell him about the itch under his skin that L’Manburg is. Instead, damningly, he stays silent again.
Quackity sends him a tired look. “Stay with me tonight to do this paperwork,” he says, and Dream knows it’s not a request, “I don’t care how long it takes. I’m not doing this by myself.”
Dream’s teeth grind with how tense his jaw is. “Quackity, I’m—”
“If you say you’re fucking busy, I swear to fucking God, Dream—”
"Fine. Fine, I’ll stay late. I’ll help.”
“Okay.” Quackity turns away, reaching for a cigarette: Dream, wildly for a moment, wants to set him on fire, wants the whole fucking country to go up in flames with him. “Don’t even think about going back to whatever else you’re doing until this is over. Do you understand me?”
“Yes sir,” Dream replies, stiff, and Quackity’s wings fluff up in anger. Neither of them are sure where the poison between them has come from. Neither are sure how to dissolve it. But yes, sir hangs bitterly in the air between them, and Dream feels nothing but vitriol running through his veins.
—
A flash of silver. Blood splattering on the floor.
"Quackity—”
Dream’s voice isn’t cold anymore. It’s desperate. It’s shattered.
Another blow. Head spinning. Vision blurring. Chest heaves for breath, hands scramble for a grip on something solid as the world heaves—
A face comes into focus. Scarred, familiar, friendly in the past. Dream reaches out at first, dizzied and disorientated.
Another blow reminds him of their present relationship. Sprawling to the floor, Dream gasps, and blood pools around them both.
“Don’t ever fucking talk to me about Sapnap again,” Quackity’s voice viciously comes from above him, “do you understand me?”
Dream swallows blood, swallows clever retorts, swallows pleas.
“Yes, sir,” he chokes out, and Quackity’s only response is another kick.
14 notes
·
View notes