#and idkkkk i know it sounds so cringe. like obvs its romanticized idealized
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
Do u ever think abt where al (and talon too neow?) will go when u find ur person irl? Ykwim? like do u think we'd forget them / drop / git bored of our lil oc guys (of al's nature)? it feels sad!!! like a real loss 2 me. is it weird to be attached to them like they r real? HMM.
i hope ur doing well btw wit all da things ur goin thru. wishin u the best, peace and stability to u, bruther <3
dis is so scary i was just talking to a friend about something adjacent to this...
putting under read more solely because it feels weird to have some of the stuff im gonna mention just out in the open loll ^_^ ^_^
so! I kind of already experienced something like this last year, when i found myself um...in a situation like one you described...
I put al up on the shelf for a bit then picked him back up a few months later for much needed comfort among lots of confusion... I look at this Now as maybe being because, well. things started going south at that time and i needed Al again... + that makes sense! but i also have a friend who's in a long term relationship who still has thier own array of characters in their brain to lean on for comfort (though they aren't ocs)
I understand what you mean though... I'm attached to them like they're real. and neither outcome sounds good to me...!
like if the case is just that The Best Fit For Me, My Partner, really will make me forget about them, that makes me sad!!! Al has been in my life for such a long time. in those few short months of my situation where things were nice, I didn't have much to draw...! I don't know what I would draw if it wasn't my little comforts...! My yearning... It felt really weird even if i was happy for a little bit... it felt weird that he was just Gone.
BUT if the case is that i find a partner that's a good fit for me and i DONT forget about Al (and talon)...then that's also kinda sad...! Sad that I still need additional fantasy comfort that can never be real... because the little guys in my brain are like their own people... sad that there's nothing on earth close enough in the same way that everyone you date can have their own qualities you'll miss because theyre their own person, except they'll always just be in my brain and never in my arms etc etc... it is sad.... sometimes i just get emotional over having created em at all because all the outcomes are so sad to me......
#skunk mail#Anonymous#long post#long ask#like argh i cant believe it.#you bring me so much comfort and sanity but remembering you dont exist hurts so bad.#i wish i could be happy with just you in my brain but i need to physically hold somebody but nobody will ever be you...!#and you will never be real but i love you so muck...#id be worse off if you never existed but you're never going to leave... and nothing will ever compare...augh#and if u do leave thats also sad !#and idkkkk i know it sounds so cringe. like obvs its romanticized idealized#but i already experienced the real thing once#my friend is experiencing the real thing now#and we still needed/need that supplemental love that isnt real...ugh#ykwim? so this isnt even just ''fictional character better because Easier and No Struggle''#bc even in my fantasies there's conflict or ups and downs or just boring days...domestic things#wahh#i wouldnt even be happy being like the cockroach wife guy. i cant be happy if i dont have anyone to physically tangibly share a life with.#ive really just screwed myself over with my copium#BUT like it also makes sense??? one person cant be your everything you still have friends that fill different roles in your life#but idk. its still hard bc the ppl in my brain do fulfill different needed roles but arent real
16 notes
·
View notes