#and i'd say the same thing can be applied for socialization a bit

[anaalnathrakhs]

one day i wish to understand exactly what was my parents' modus operandi for my childhood because i cannot for the life of me figure out the logic but also there HAS to be some kind of underlying belief to it because i turned out with mom-n-dad-shaped fundamental flaws to my character

[sugawhaaa]

HAN ONE-SHOT

⭐️🖤Naughty boy🖤⭐️

Warnings//genre::SMUT! roleplay, praise and degradation, edging, mommy dynamic, dacryphilia (Like big time)

Pairing:: sub!Han x dom!fem!reader

A/N:: this fanfic is so special in the sense that it's not like super dom and sub but there is still that control and loss of control feeling. Idk how to explain it but it's just so sweet and sexy at the same time 😭 also this is way shorter than I had planned sorry

Skz masterlist:: 🖤

🎧::

Han didn't expect much after such an eventful day. It was Christmas day and Han woke up super early, just like a kid, to open all the presents, you cooked breakfast, took a nap at lunchtime, and ate lunch at like 2 pm then got ready to go to Han's parents' place for dinner and socialized for way too damn long.

When you got home Han flopped onto his bed, groaning as he tore off his clothes, leaving him in his pants. He wasn't sure where you went, just that you were in the bathroom for a while, so long so that he got worried.

"Hey babe, you good?" He sits up on the bed to call for you only to see you leaning against the door frame in Christmas lingerie. "O-Oh," his eyes widened as his lips visibly parted. His cheeks glow red as he straightens his posture on the bed, chuckling lowly. "Is this my last gift of the day? My present from Santa for being good?" He smiles as you close the door with your foot and begin to walk over to him but he can instantly tell from the way you present yourself that he gravely misread this situation.

"I'd say it's more...discipline," you smirk before adjusting your latex glove. Han laughs awkwardly as he scoots up the bed, further away from you but you quickly pin him down and he jumps. "For all the naughty things I didn't catch you doing," you explain, and Han chuckles awkwardly again.

"I've been good," he nods with those big doe eyes, pleading for mercy. You tilt your head with a cocked brow.

"Really now? Then we can go through your private laptop then," he sit on his lap and reach for his laptop to which he quickly grabs your wrist.

"Hehe...babe I don't think you'll wanna see..." he blushes but it's no use; you open his laptop and go through his search history and browsers. Hundreds of kinky porn videos and hentai loaded up his laptop. You raise an eyebrow at him as he lets the bed swallow him whole in shame. "I-I can explain," he chuckles before biting his lip. You then click on one of the videos, allowing it to play into the awkwardly quiet room.

The laptop then began moaning and begging but not in a female voice, but a male.

"Please, I'll be a good boy," the laptop cries out and you raise a brow at Han.

"I don't only watch that kind of stuff!" Han desperately explains but you click on another video. Two guys...

"It's too big!" The man cries out and Han's face burns and just as he tries to explain himself the laptop moans loudly. You pause the video.

"Ready to admit you've been a naughty boy?" You tilt your head and Han pouts slightly, nodding. You close the laptop and set it back on the nightstand. "And you agree you deserve at least a little punishment for this?" Han sighs in response.

"Fine," he pouts but on the inside, he's over the moon excited for what you're going to do to him. You get him completely undressed and make him wait on the bed as you bring over the bin of toys. You sort through to find a bottle of lube but not any regular lube, this lube creates a warm, tingly sensation when applied; Han doesn't know this though.

You squirt a little bit onto his tip before massaging it in. He leans back with a deep moan, pleasure already taking him in a deep grasp. As you massage his cock he notices the warm, tingling sensations and it's overwhelmingly pleasurable. "Baby i-is this a new kind of lube?" He asks shyly and looks up at you with doe eyes.

"Yes, it is~" You grab the lube and apply a bit more and he moans louder, his back arched and chest puffed. "Can you feel the warming effect?" You ask with a hint of mischief and he nods.

"Y-Yeah..." he tosses his head back. "'Feels good," he nods and you smile with a little smirk as you move your hand faster.

"That's good baby," you say as his moans grow harsher and your hand moves faster. His face contorted in pleasure as his balls began to tighten, but it was still too early...right? His cock began to twitch in your hand and you felt the throb of his veins against your palm.

"I-I think..." Han blushes but he knows he doesn't have to say anything for you to understand. You begin to move your palm faster and Han lets out a whine. "O-Oh god!" He reaches out mindlessly to find something to grab onto. His hand finds your skirt and he tugs on it hard. "Oh don't stop!" He cries out as his legs shake slightly.

"what would you do if I did?" You tease and he whines loudly.

"Fuck, I don't know, probably cry," He croaks out along with some stutters. You tilt your head as he continues to moan, his lips quivering slightly; perhaps that was a sight you wanted to see. Jisungie sobbing so prettily below you. Your hand subconciously slows as you imagine how fucked up you could make him. "No god, please no!" He cries out but it's already too late, his climax already washing away as your hands lose contact with his body.

Han tosses his head back with a sound that's a mix between a groan and a sigh. He pouts softly as he stares up at the ceiling, his cock still twitching every now and then. "Why'd you stop?" He whines, silently pleading for you to resume the torture.

"You'll see," You smirk and a chill runs down his spine. You stand up and retrieve some restraints; it's ironic because Han bought them to use on you but he seem to always be the one tied up in the silky ropes of pleasure. Han whines as he sees you bring out his arch nemesis, however he doesn't resist; at this point he knows better than to protest his mistress.

You get hans wrists tied up to the headboard of the bed and he's already a squirming, whining mess. It seems that even after all the nights he's been chained, cuffed and tied he still can't keep still. Han bucks his hips up against nothing, pleading you to give him some attention.

"Please touch me baby, please I'll do anything right now," He looks up at you with that look. The look of raw desperation and weakness, he is completely under your spell.

"Is that so? Then say it," You lean closer to him, your body hovering over him, ghosting over his skin.

"S-Say what?" He looks distraught as he pulls himself closer to you.

"you know exactly what," You smirk and a realization dawns upon him.

"Please mommy, I'll be good, I promise," He pleads helplessly, his voice cracking which makes him blush. "Use me, hurt me, fuck me I don't care just make me cum," He looks up at you with those eyes again, as if he were trying to communicate through his eyes, begging for you. You think for a moment; he just gave you a lot of ideas didn't he? Fuck him? That sounds fun but you did that like last week. Hurt him? Nah he's too sooky for that right now. Then perhaps...use him?

"Alright, since you asked so nicely," You smile and he grins wide. You then lean down before abruptly sucking him into your mouth. His whole body jerks forward, pulling on the restraints.

"Fuck! W-Why do you always do that?" He whines, his bottom lip jutting out unintentionally.

You start by just sucking his tip but quickly make your way down until he's stuffed into your mouth. Meanwhile Han is having a crisis over the amount of pleasure he's in. The warmth of your mouth, the way you pull his cock with your lips, your throat tightening and loosening around his cock, how much longer can he last? He pulls on the restraints hard, leaving red marks on his wrists, as his body squirms around to follow the pleasure you bring him. "Baby-Mommy I think I-I," Han attempts to warn you about the incoming flood of cum he's built up but you quickly pull off his cock and he whines loudly again. You abruptly grab his jaw, a little forceful, but not too much. You can feel his breath against your hand, coming in and out in a rapid pace, as the pulse in his neck throbs against your hand, signaling at his racing heart from the adrenline.

"You cum when I say you can cum. Got it?" You tilt you head and he whines softly as he nods. "Good boy," You kiss his jaw and you hear the whimper he holds in his throat. You throw your leg over him to straddle him and he looks up at you with a different look this time, one of excitement and lust. You adjust your skirt to reveal you were wearing nothing under it the whole time. Jisung's face flushes as he sees your lack of clothing. You then position yourself over him, his cock aligned with your slit. You begin to sink down on his cock, the two of you moaning in unison as his cock fills you. You let out a deep breath before beginning to rock your hips very softly. Jisung groans as he feels his tip rubbing up against your hilt and a grin of pleasure spreads across his face.

It's not long before you find yourself hopping on Han, not quite bouncing, but you were coming up and down on him. He tugs at the restraints again as he arches his back and you feel his cock twitching inside you.

"C-Can I cum soon?" He looks up at you with doe eyes that you literally can't say no to.

"Soon baby," You stroke his cheek softly and he let's out a pathetic whine. He then tosses his head back nd you can tell by his expression it's taking everything in him to not burst right then and there. You begin to ride him harder, the sound of your skin clapping together echoes in the room.

"Please!" He sobs out before groaning, "I can't, I can't~" as tears build on his lashes. Your eyes widen at the sight but you could tell he wasn't in pain, no, he was loving this. He looks directly into your eyes as tear falls along the curve of his cheek. Han then squints his shut and tears pour down his cheeks, his orgasm hitting him like a tidal wave. "Fuck!" He cries as his hands slip out of the restraints to pull you close. His arms wrap around your chest as he moans loudly and breathlessly into your ear. He then faintly whispers "Thank you," before resting his head on your shoulder.

you were momentarily frozen but you snap out of it and wrap your arms around him.

"Your welcome," You smile and he nuzzles into your neck, moaning softly.

"You just look so sexy in this," He tugs at your lingerie and you blush with a little smile.

[ethereal555]

JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY.

angst x jobe bellingham.

You’ve never seen Jobe act this way before. We had just finished our dinner at Hakkasan which started off lovely; you'd both missed each other to bits. It started when Jobe expressed his confusion about the amount our waiter spoke to me, the way in which he spoke and looked at me and definetly didnt like the fact I was slighly enthusiatic in return when the mans questions regarding my profession. And no matter how many times i'd tell Jobe, that 'it's common decency' it fell upon deaf ears every time.

In situations such as these which occured often, he'd be a baby about it and whine about how all the men we come across were always infactuated with me and how it wasn't fair because I am his and his only. Or he'd tell me to be more blunt and harsh in my rejections. At least he was communicating with me..

But this time, it was an intense silence on the way back home, a silence that left your mind unsettled.

-

You both made your way back to his black Audi. Your gaze frequently shifting from the side profile and then to the floor as you internally prepared yourself to rectify this issue before it got out of hand.

Your gaze landed on Jobe again only to see his sharp jawline prominent due to the extent of which he was tensing it. Tensed hard enough to break glass. You also noticed his walking pace quickening by the second, another telling sign of the volcanic eruption brewing within him.

“J, you’re going too fast can you hold my hand please?” you whined. You knew he wasn’t in the mood for that and definitely had other things on his mind but he did it anyway reaching his long arm back and in doing so not sparing me a glance. Your rolled your eyes, hard.

You latched onto his hand making your way back to the car at a decent speed this time. Thank God.

Everytime you both were at a social event, there would always be an odd circunstance that occurs leaving one of you jealous, disheartened or upset. Jobe was the usual culprit; you had told your man for what felt like the uptenneth times that you were an attractive girl, men were bound to stop and stare and wink and do whatever they desired and the same applied to him. But you also told him, there would never be any reciprocation from your side; which you expected him to trust. Simply saying thank you to compliments would suffice. Just common decency that you'd been taught growing up- it wasn't going to change. It baffled you as you'd never given him any slack throughout your 3 year relationship about any of the thousands of fangirls that were overbearring and desperate around him. You trusted him, and you were secure.

This time, you think it hit harder for him because it was supposed to be an especially romantic date; as you both had been apart for 5 months in different countries for work purposes - so you did sympathize slightly.

You halt in your tracks, consequently making Jobe's walking stop. He looks back at you, unimpressed. You smile at him sweetly, leaning up to kiss his mouth. 'Please don't be mad at me. Baby, I've missed you so much and I want us spend quality time tonight. I really enjoyed dinner and I want to enjoy.. you later.' you whine as you pepper wet kisses over his jawline and neck. Hoping he'd leave this atttitude in the resturant and not bring it home with us.

You see his adam's apple move up and down, he beckons with his head 'Get in the car, Tee', pushing at your waist.

You both get to the car, and to your surprise he doesn’t open the door for you, like he usually does. He goes straight to the drivers seat and sits.

You scoff entering from your side of the car, slamming it shut once you were in.

“Listen Jobe. Bellingham. Don’t let your jealousy get you fucked up. I don’t give a toss if you're pissed , especially because of how stupid it is. You’re still my man. So act right.” You scold mushing his head with your index and middle finger.

He moves his head away from your hands.

“Stop - don’t touch meh or ya walking home, crazy girl”

“Get the lad in 'er to rush over and open the door for ya, and 'em lads you like to entertain. Desperate” He said gesturing towards the waiter who was now serving some guests who were seated outside.

You look at him dumbfounded. Mouth wide open.

'I could.. Jobe.. i could spit on your right now, how dare you..?'.

'Try it' he dares, an inferno arising in his chest.

“Y-You're really upset because I was being a decent human being. You’re a child you know that right? and you're fucking childish and immature and direspectful as fuck” you spat.

“That’s great actually - fucking brilliant - because I’d rather be a child than be a fucking flirt that hasn’t a self aware bone in their body” he humours, driving out of the parking lot.

It felt like your heart dropped.

“A flirt? When did I flirt?” I questioned hysterically. I understand Jobe was jealous , and had those tendencies, but to say I was entertaining another man was absurd and not in my character.

You start to shake your feet, attempting to distract yourself from this recongizable feeling. The heat you felt rising from your chest racing toward your throat, your cheeks burning and your eyes stinging. No, you thought, I'm not giving him the satisfaction.

'Stop the car', you cry. Struggling to get your phone our of your back, that was placed by your feet and underneath the dashboard.

Your voice betraying you.

'N-now, Jobe, I can't anymore' you shake your head continously.

'Ya can't do what?", his face softeneing for this first time as he briefly turns to look at you. He pulls into a side road and removes his seatbelt turning to face you. Rubbing his hands over his face as if I was the one stressing him out.

You chuckle bitterly 'that's the only thing you've listened to, this whole ride', your vision and your thoughts become blurry so you carefully remove the accumulated tears from your eyes as you try and call an uber, not wanting to pull any of your clusters out.

Jobe cradles your face when his left hand, you react as if his hand was a bowl of scorthching hot oil.

'If ya must ya can call the uber later, just look at me'.

You knew he hated to see you cry, that was his kryptonite, no matter how bad the arguement is.

His right had catches your other cheek until he has encaptured the entirety of your face within his palms. He stares, looking deep into your eyes, for what felt like minutes. maybe searching for words to say, accountability maybe.. you anticipated an apology ..

“Ya do this all the time me love.."

'what jobe, what i do?' you croak

'ya cry when I tell ya the truth, baby, ya know I don’t lie', he pecks the corner of your lips.

You break away and look at him through your now damp lash clusters and teary eyes.

my man my man my mf man

'make up your mind' - chris brown inspo kinda

i hate a nigga that doesnt take accountability btw.

[marzipanandminutiae]

Do you know much about historical cuisine? Saw yet another anime with friends and they went the whole 'modern food always tastes better' bit. I feel tired of the trope and am wondering how different historical cuisine would taste compared to modern times. So anything you happen to know as a historian would be cool to know!

That varies MASSIVELY based on time and location. Like. Much more than fashion does, even, I'd imagine (in a given sub-region- I can talk about Mainstream European and Euro-American Fashion of the 19th CenturyTM but the food was so different in different countries that were dressing the same, if that makes sense? just as an example).

Food is often more globalized in a lot of places nowadays, so the characters might have more diversity of flavors from the regional norm than they're used to. But this could be a good or a bad thing- a woman from 17th-century Japan might love pizza and much sweeter Western pastries, or she might absolutely hate them. Which is not to say regional cuisines haven't evolved, too- a museum here in Boston used to have tastings of 18th-century-style hot chocolate, and it was very different from the modern sort. But that's the largest blanket difference across the globe that I can think of, food-wise.

Not sure what anime this was, so it could have been Japan-specific, but I feel like this gets applied the most to the 19th-mid 20th century UK and United States. The whole Captain America line about "food's better; we used to boil everything," for example, and the general belief that everything was bland mush in those areas until the 1950s and then it was incomprehensible Jell-O mold horrors until approximately the 1980s. And of course, none of that's true- there were plenty of dishes that used spices and different cooking methods, many of which are still popular today. See also: Jonathan Harker, a Normal 1890s Englishman, getting so rhapsodical about paprikahendl that he simply must have the recipe for his fiancee to make. There also WERE bland mushes and fluorescent nightmares, but there's less than ideal food today, as well.

(Note that I'm much less confident talking about the whole English StodgeTM thing as we get into the 20th century. That is outside my history wheelhouse and there's a lot of different stuff embroiled in it relating to class and such that I don't want to talk out my ass about. All I know is that I've seen plenty of recipes from as late as the end of the 19th century, from England and some from urban Scotland if I recall correctly, that made ample use of spices. Nutmeg, mustard, black pepper, rosemary, caraway, and cayenne pepper were especially popular (not all together obviously). There was a belief among the middle and upper classes that strong flavors of garlic and onion were distasteful to ladies, but the fact that cookbooks and such feel the need to mention it implies that those elements WERE being used in cooking generally, in the UK, at that time. So wherever the idea that All British Food Is Beige And Tasteless came from, it wasn't mainstream late Victorian cooking for adults as far as I can tell)

(They gave kids a fair amount of the beige and tasteless because they believed their digestive systems couldn't handle strongly-flavored- okay now I'm getting off topic. Read Ruth Goodman's "How To Be A Victorian." Anyway!)

tl;dr- The answer to "is modern food better?" is "that's literally impossible to answer as a blanket statement, since it's massively dependent on the character's original time, place, social status, and personal taste- and where they end up in the present, of course."

Now, I do agree that the trope is annoying the same way every single princess being totally shocked and appalled when her marriage is arranged gets annoying- not because it can't be true based on history and human behavior, but because fiction treats it as some kind of universal precept. Mix it up a little sometimes! Have a Regency character who comes to the present, finds out that her favorite local cheese isn't being made anymore, and loses her entire mind!

[lunascalamity]

Hey hi!! I LOVE your writing sm and I'd love to request!! Maybe a needy Midoriya or Denki fic? (If you're comfortable I saw you write for shoto but I dunno if that means for all mha characters) Either way if you write this or not I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE MORE OF YOUR WRITING <3

Possibly 🦢 anon?

Warnings: dom! reader, no gendered pronouns used, hand job, blow job, implied nipple play, slight marking if you squint, and I believe that is all

A/n: Hi 🦢anon! Tysm for the feedback! I’m glad you like my writing ♥︎ I was planning on writing for both of them but then it ended up being too long, so I’ll write for denki another time ^^. Also, I assumed you meant nsfw. If not, feel free to request again.

You were laying down next to izuku, scrolling through various social media apps, while he does the same. It was a comfortable atmosphere where you guys didn’t have to talk just to spend time together.

After a while, he started inching closer and closer to you. Assuming he just wanted to cuddle, you laid his head down on your chest, hugging him closer. He started stealing quick glances at you through the reflection on your phone, hugging you tighter, shifting around a bit. You chuckle as you set your phone down to give your boyfriend some more attention.

You tickle him a little, laughing together before you pull him in to cuddle again. He smiles and kisses your lips, pulling away with a slight haze over his eyes before leaning back in to place a longer one. His legs that are intertwined with yours get tighter, pulling you closer. You try and break away from the kiss, but his arms wrap around your neck stoping you.

You tap his arm and he pulls away, blinking up at you wondering why you stopped. “I need to breathe, no?” you chuckle. His cheeks flush as he avoids eye contact with you.

“Y/n…can we…maybedoitagain?” he says, quickly hiding his face in the crook of your neck.

“Do what?” you ask, carding your finger through his hair.

“Yknow…the thing we did last time.”

You quirk your brow, confused at his sudden behavior, “We do a lot of things izu be more specific.”

“You’re really going to make me say it?” It’s at this point you realize why he’s been more clingy than usual. It has been a couple days since you’ve last touched izuku. You guys only recently started getting more intimate, so you wanted to take it a bit slow.

You smirk and purposely press your knee, that’s in between his legs, closer to his heat, not enough to touch him, but enough to make him want to lean closer. “Izuuu, ‘m not a mind reader you know?~”

He whines and tilts his head, angling it closer to your ear and whispers, “I want you to make me feel good, please…” Your body heats up at his words, pressing your knee up to apply pressure onto his cock. He sucks air into his teeth and bucks his hip onto your thigh, your hands landing on his hips to help him move. “And, what is it that you want, hmm?”

“Anything mm- please anything, please?” He’s so polite even when you tease him, how cute. You untangle izuku from your body and sit against the headboard, motioning for him to sit on your lap. He straddles you instantly, wrapping your hands around his waist as he kisses you with fever. The kiss quickly gets messy as he desperately tries to keep up with the pace of your tongue. You part, kissing his jawline and down his neck before finally taking his shirt off.

You lean him back a bit, kissing his collarbones and chest. His mewls fill the room as he grinds down on your lap to seek more friction. You part from him and hook your fingers on the band of his shorts and underwear, sliding them off with his help.

After he repositions himself, he tugs on your shirt, looking at you expectedly. “Hmm? Want me to take my shirt off?” He nods honestly. You smile at his cute behavior and toss your shirt to the side.

You slide your hands on his sides before moving them to his slick cock. “You’re so wet izu, how long have you been waiting for this hmm?”

Izu stutters as your finger slides across his slit, “Been th-inking about it all week.” You meet his eyes and beginning stroking his length slowly. “MpfFF- HAH too much too much!!” He grabs your arm stopping you, letting you readjust your grip before continuing.

Izuku holds onto your shoulders for support as he struggles to fuck up into your hand. You quicken your pace, easing the pressure as you reach the tip. Izuku throws his head back as he mewls, feeling the pressure build up quickly. “I’m close, I’m so close~” You remove your hand just as he was reaching his peak and a loud whine escapes his lips as you push him down onto his back. You leave kisses down his torso before quickly licking a stripe from his sack to the tip, making his thighs shiver.

Your head dips down to take his still sensitive length into your mouth, stroking the bottom with one hand while the other is holding his hips down. “Fuckk oh my god please.”

“Breathe, izu, breathe. It’ll feel so much better. Just let it go.” He takes deep breaths, trying to relax as you continue with your sucking. You watch as his stomach tightens and tears are prickling in his eyes, jagged breathing filling your ears as you take him in full. Choked moans and whimpers echo in the room, his orgasm catching him by surprise. His back arches and eyes roll back, cum filling your mouth as you suck it all up.

As you wait for izuku to catch his breath, you rub smooth circles on his thighs to help him calm down. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, more than alright, it was great, thank you.” He rambles as you chuckle and kiss his forehead.

“Then let’s take a bath, shall we?”

So slay so mwah ugh I love him 😔 hopefully i wrote him correctly, thanks again 🦢♥︎

[thecoolerliauditore]

saw a post that's actually making the gears turn in my head a bit about how Scott shouldn't cop so much blame for Pearl's social isolation in DL when he only recounted things she did and that Ren should be the focus because he was out there calling her a witch/demoness and I don't necessarily disagree. but I think it's worth saying at least for myself that Scott didn't Lie about Pearl's behaviour but he did purposefully leave out details that change things dramatically e.g. the axe crits happening Before Pearl started freezing herself thus him starting the cycle of abuse in the first place (not to mention this all stemming back to the nether thing).

and this is something you see a lot IRL with toxic relationships probably I'd argue more than just outright lying and insulting the other party, because "look at all these crazy things pearl did, isn't she bad" is a lot more easily agreed with than "pearl is crazy".

This is not me saying that like. Scott's not allowed to be freaked out about Pearl's more extreme behaviour like her breaking into his house. but it stands that he went out of his way to maliciously refer to her and isolate her when he and Cleo were her entire world.

The Missing Missing Reasons article is about parental abuse specifically, but I think this pattern of behaviour can also be applied to other relationships. I know this is an insane thing to source in mcyt posting but I really do think it's a good read everyone should experience at least once regardless of context.

"Witch", "demoness" and "crazy ex girlfriend" are all the same in that they are labels used to villainize a woman specifically. And I'd even go to say, in Pearl's case, they are all equally abstract since she and Scott were never in an actual relationship, he's just decided to call her that.

I never want to make it sound like I think Pearl is entirely angelic, she very much plays into the role she's given, but it remains as a role she was given rather than something innate to her character. But I think it's important to look at a power dynamic and identify what's actually going on because I've heard "they were toxic to eachother" too many times when one party was left completely without her entire support system with no explanation (her relationships pre-DL were pretty much just Scott, Cleo and People Who Try To Kill Us) while the other party did everything in his power to actively harm her without indicating himself as the bad guy.

As for Ren, I'm not a massive Ren guy so I can't pretend I can begin to understand exactly what went on in his head other than that I think DL Rendog was probably suffering from many diseases but the Rendog misogyny post would go insane. There's something madonna/whore complex about him. There you go guys whoa a freudian concept I'm keeping my branding going

[ingravinoveritas]

What do you make of David sayin he’s an ally, not an active participant (in queer subcultures)?

Did he come out as straight? I’m not sure anyone has ever asked him directly, not that he needs to give any explanations, I’m just curious because he gives off such a queer vibe even when he’s been married forever.

https://www.attitude.co.uk/culture/david-tennant-on-the-spice-girls-spiceworld-movie-was-being-developed-before-they-even-released-a-single-459815/

Oh, my Asks/DMs have been blowing up over this one. I did have a chance to read this interview with David (is it me, or is he doing nonstop press lately?) and...wow. Definitely enjoyable, and noticeably more unhinged/queer than most of his other interviews (which makes sense, given that Attitude is an LGBTQ-focused publication). But let's get a screenshot up of the most talked about bit, so we can discuss:

Obviously there is a lot going on here, so I'm just going to go with what stood out to me most. I don't think there is anything in the world less surprising than David naming bears first, given certain preferences of his (which I've discussed several times previously on my blog).

What's really interesting though is that the question was asking about queer subcultures, but all of the ones David listed are used primarily (AFAIK, though someone please do correct me if I am wrong) in mlm/gay male relationships. "Queer" can be many things, after all--gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, ace--and yet when David heard "queer subcultures" he specifically went for the mlm/gay ones, and that definitely feels like an interesting choice.

The second thing that I felt was worth discussing is that a lot of the reactions I've seen to this is people saying how adorably clueless David is, or how "he's a little confused, but he's got the spirit." And I'm sort of perplexed by this because we are talking about an almost 53-year-old man here, and I believe he knows damn well what all of those terms/subcultures are.

It's been brought to my attention (from what I would consider a very trustworthy source) that David is not at all as technologically illiterate as he pretends to be. Instead, it's actually part of a persona that he puts on to avoid dealing with issues that would arise from people knowing he is online. I had an inkling of this just from Georgia saying David was the one who set up all the equipment for when they filmed Staged at home (because why would such a task be put in the hands of someone who is hopeless with technology?). But having this confirmed also aligns with David creating a fake personal assistant in the early days of his career so he wouldn't have to fulfill certain social obligations, and to put a barrier between his real self and the world.

So why, then, wouldn't the same pattern possibly apply here?

I know there also tends to be this image of David as a "bumbling, goofy dad" type, and that's definitely part of him and what makes him so charming. But I don't think he is a fool, either--especially not after listening to him talk about Shakespeare or politics or anything else at length--and I think he certainly knows how to answer these types of questions. I think David is more than clever enough to give answers that are cheeky but not revealing, because he knows the purpose of all this is to promote the BAFTAs, not to be a deep, probing exposé on the life and times of David Tennant.

Which then brings me to the big, gay elephant standing in the middle of the room--a.k.a., "I'm an ally rather than an active participant." (Again...so many interesting word choices going on here, and none of it feels like an accident.)

Going back to what I mentioned about the focus of these interviews, I'd like to point out one notable thing that David himself said in the Radio Times interview earlier this week:

This, I think, sums up what we are seeing in all of these interviews: The version of David that he feels is safe to present to the world. He makes it clear as well that he is not going to reveal areas of his personal life while up on stage, and I would say that the same thing applies to these interviews. (It also speaks volumes that in the year 2024, the version of himself he feels safe presenting in these interviews is one who fully knows what bears and twinks--sorry, twinkies--are.)

So no, I don't think David is coming out as straight. I don't think he's coming out as anything, in fact, because he knows these interviews are not the place for that to happen. And I think that saying he is an ally but not an active participant makes the most sense as an answer for a public interview, but neither that nor being in a straight-passing relationship necessarily makes him any less potentially queer.

To reiterate what I said above, there is no one way to be queer. For some people, being queer absolutely can mean going to leather bars and participating in subcultures. But for other people, "queer" can mean something very different. It can mean being a Kinsey 2 just floating along doing your thing until you meet that one person who changes everything. The person who makes you go, "I've usually been more into this and not as much into this...but I'm definitely into you." It can mean being attracted to/falling for someone--a co-star, maybe?--that you never expected to feel that way about. And if David is queer, maybe that also means not shying away from anything, but at the same time not wanting to take the spotlight off the awards and the nominees celebrating one of the most important nights of their lives.

Those are my thoughts on the Attitude interview and David's answers, at any rate. Happy as always to hear from my followers with your takes. Thank you for writing in! x

[dawndelion-winery]

Mad Scientist's PA

Part 2 to this but can be read alone

Dottore × GN! Reader

    Being Zandik's favourite person had its pros and cons. Mostly cons, you'd say, for he was very much like a cat in the sense that he was very demanding of your attention when it was convenient for him, bestowing upon you the subtlest of gestures of appreciation in turn, be it a nearly unnoticeable nod or a barely audible hum of approval.

    "Here," you huffed, dropping a small bag of cookies on the table as you took your seat beside him (he had oh so thoughtfully "helped" you apply for all the same classes as him), to which his gaze barely flickered over, his hand never ceasing the motion of scribbling on loose parchment. To an outsider's eye, it might seem like he was ignoring you, but you knew better. The fact that he had even made that subtle motion was telling enough he was acknowledging you; had it been anyone else, he'd have continued act as though they weren't there - or should they encroach on his personal space, lash out.

    You simply carried on as he did, laying out your things and beginning your own note taking until the class reached a point of discussion. As per the arrangement (decided by Zandik), he was your discussion partner.

    "I think you could afford to learn a few new recipes," Zandik grumbled as he bit into a cookie. His face was impassive, bored, with crumbs sticking around his mouth. Regardless of his complaints, he was getting through the baked goods at an alarming rate.

    "And I think you could afford to get breakfast before class," you retorted, to which he scoffed, rubbing the crumbs off his face with his sleeve and pointing at you. "Then bring me breakfast before class."

    You narrowed your eyes at him and sighed as you returned to your work, knowing full well there was no winning arguments with him. This worked well enough in your favour, since Zandik didn't take well to being disregarded. And his solution to reclaiming your attention? Activating tutor mode. Almost like flicking a switch, he scooches his chair closer to you, leaning over your shoulder for an actual discussion on the material. In times like this, you could almost forget what an overbearing slave driver he was.

    You hated to admit it, but classes were a breeze with him. As much as you'd like to attribute it to your own quick wit and understanding, you knew better than to ignore how much help you've gotten from Zandik - there were things he'd taught you that you were sure even the professor's weren't aware of. If things carried on the way they were until your graduation, you'd doubtlessly be qualified for any career you wanted. As you thought about it, Zandik prodded your cheek with his pen, asking what had you so deep in thought, and rolling his eyes as he resumed writing, pointing out how you'd missed a good few pages worth of notes.

    You scrambled to try catch up, muttering about how you were just thinking about the future. "Just wondering what I'll be once I graduate."

    "What's there to think about?" He scoffed as he slid over the notes you'd missed. "You'll be my personal assistant, just like you are now."

    You didn't quite process his words while you were rushing to catch up, but once class had ended, it finally hit you. "What do you mean? I can't just work for you my whole life."

    "Why not?" He seemed genuinely confused, as though he'd never considered your protests a possibility. "I'd pay you well."

    "To fetch things for you? Running errands like some intern?"

    "That and handling my experimental data...and my chores...and meals...oh heck, let's just call it miscellaneous tasks and more."

    If he had the social awareness to read the disgust on your face, he sure didn't show it, grinning at you without a care in the world.

"By the way, have I ever told you how much I enjoy your cooking?"

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Zandik."

    You did end up as his personal assistant. You comforted yourself by insisting it was your choice - no one paid as generously as he did!! It was the logical decision to make. Were you sent on the most random of tasks and expected to be at his beck and call 24/7? Yes, but compared to slaving away for hours each day, you only ever really needed to focus on the occasional odd job here and there. The rest of your time could be spent as you wished until his next task so long as you remained contactable. He was pretty lax like that. As odd as Zandik was, he wasn't delusional enough to believe you'd stay with him when anyone would be happy to hire you fresh out of the akademiya. Which was really what led to the working perks with him.

    "Coffee, my dear," Zandik - or rather, Dottore as he went by now - demanded without so much as raising his head, only lifting his mug and holding it out for you to fill. Begrudgingly, you dragged your feet over, bringing the coffee big with you.

    "It's four in the *yawn* morning...Za- Dottore...can we just go to bed already..." you groaned, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.

    "Of course you're free to sleep. I'll wake you when you're needed."

    Narrowing your eyes in suspicion, you set down the mug on the counter, letting him know you'd be off. Yeah, maybe don't take his word for it next time. His idea of walking you was screeching your name til you showed up.

Taglist: @myluvkeiji @aqui-soba @favonius-captain @tiredsleep @raincxtter @gensimping-for-all @irethepotato @almond-adeptus @mx-kamisato @chaosinanutshell @heizours @haliyamori @callmemeelah @sadlonelybagel @plinkuro @thevictoriousmoon @mastering-procrastinating @cxlrose @astrequa @lemonswriting @eowinthetraveler @ajaxstar @boundedbyfate @the-lost-anime-dad @moonbyunniee @greyrain23 @heavenlyfloof

Commissioned by @monstersealclubber

[eldragon-x-moved]

Okay let's talk about how actually Bill is attached to Ford and genuinely sees him as a friend and maybe even likes him more than literally anyone else which was originally going to mainly revolve around Weirdmageddon, however I absolutely needed to add creator commentary and extra-canon in order to dig into Bill's mentality.

First, I'd like to point out this comment by Hirsch from the Sock Opera DVD commentary about how Bill views Mabel:

“Bill genuinely believes that Mabel’s kinda like him. He sees Mabel as a chaos agent. Like, Mabel has got a little bit of a seed of anarchy in her, she’s a little bit selfish, she likes to have fun at whatever cost. And Bill is all those things times a billion. So he thinks when he lays it all out for her like: ‘How about instead of being lame, you do something fun! And crush whoever you want in the process!’. He thinks that’s gonna go over. And he’s not wrong in seeing that side in Mabel but Mabel is a better person than Bill Cipher.”

as well as this bit from "Dipper's and Mabel's Guide to Mystery and Nonstop Fun" written by Bill:

Both which pretty much confirm that Bill likes Mabel and assumes they're alike based on a couple similarities, which adds up when you look at how he treats and interacts with Mabel in the show but let's not derail.

The point I'm trying to make here is that if Bill can get attached and relate to a twelve year old he's known for half a summer, it's pretty easy to imagine he probably feels similarly about a guy he's known for thirty years and is the character who by far has the strongest connection to Bill.

Of course for Bill to relate to Ford there has to be some similarity in the first place. And there are! You could compare Ford's willingness to build an interdimensional portal to gain knowledge and admiration to Bill's desire to reach beyond his own two-dimensional world and eventual attain of knowledge and power.

Of course, Ford isn't the first person to attempt to build a portal for Bill. But the similarities run deeper than that.

So you know how Ford's been ostracized for all his life and leaned into trying to be outstanding and special which was encouraged and made worse by Bill?

Because Bill namedrops the author of Flatland in the Bill Cipher AMA when asked about his birth dimension.

and on top of that, in Journal 3 Ford describes a dimension called Exwhylia which references Flatland and suggests Bill could have come from a similar dimension.

To keep it short for those unfamiliar, Flatland is a book about a place of that same name and describes it as a plane where three-dimensionality is incomprehensible, only the heads of society are allowed to know about other dimensions, the social system depends on a strict hierarchy, everything that risks deviating from the norm is shut down, may be worth mentioning here that triangles are near the bottom of the hierarchy too.

Yeah I don't think I need to really explain that Bill would absolutely hate it here and it's really jarring how much this place clashes with him.

Anyway do you see where I'm going with this? Bill probably being shunned by his world and Ford's whole deal?

About the leaning into being special thing, Flatland people are really just. people but shapes. So to me it implies Bill didn't always have his powers (on top of him literally saying "I wasn't always this way" in Weird 3 while talking about his newly gained powers and before talking about his old dimension). Can you imagine how much gaining those brought out the worst in him? I think he was already self-centered before but now he has more reason to see himself above others.

Now obviously, Bill just claimed Ford was special and called him his friend as a manipulation tactic, but it's significant to remember that we're talking about the guy who said this:

and is pretty much confirmed to apply this mindset to himself:

I think that while yes, Ford and Bill's friendship started out as nothing but manipulation on Bill's part, he really grew attached to the guy based on what they had in common.

Unfortunately, Bill does the same mistake with Ford as he does with Mabel and assumed he's more like him than he really is. I mean,

Bill wrote this into the Journal during Ford's paranoid era. And I don't think he's just rambling because he says "don't you understand" and "I ask you" which very much sounds like he's trying to be convincing.

Anyway, yeah I think this scene from Weirdmageddon 1 was really another genuine offer, rather than just plain and simply Bill mocking Ford.

Also Weirdmageddon 2 pretty much proves to me that Bill does see Ford as special. Just look at how he's always carrying golden Ford around in contrast to all the stone-turned townsfolk being built into his throne. Literally special treatment! In a bad messed up way.

Also a big fan of this episode showing that Bill does not care about the well-being of his so-called friends (which is even more outright in the uncut storyboard version of this scene)

really cementing the fact that not only does Bill see himself above mortals, but above everyone and really the only apparent reason they are friends is because they support Bill and he thinks they're fun.

So yeah it is absolutely possible for Bill to regard Ford on a similar level as them, maybe even above them. Finally, let's talk about the penthouse scene because I have a lot of feelings about that one.

-

After attempting to charm Ford, Bill's first move in trying to negotiate is talking about his old dimension and how restricting and narrow-minded it was. Already brought this scene up earlier but honestly the fact that he just drops that on Ford is wild to me.

Like, this is the same guy who, according to the Axolotl, yearns for his old dimension but denies to himself that he deeply regrets destroying it. Bill hates showing vulnerability. He hates even acknowledging it. He only cares for vulnerability if it comes from other people for him to exploit!

So him telling Ford that his dimension was awful and he was genuinely miserable there is huge. Not just him telling Ford that, but also just the expression? The tone? This is the most sincere Bill has ever been throughout the show and possibly the most sincere he's been in decades, centuries, millennia, God knows. Even if it's still filtered through a lie he's been telling himself for most of his life.

And yeah obviously, Bill was desperate and needed Ford to help him at this point but I think it would've been "easier" for Bill to just. Maybe try and solve the barrier problem himself. Ford figured it out, so surely Bill can at least try instead of, Idk, laying his heart out to the person who has dedicated his life to killing him.

I think Bill tried to make Ford relate to him in this scene for the sake of getting him to join but also maybe, just maybe, Bill craved connection? Dude's a lot more sentimental than he seems and lets on and spending an eternity only befriending people who you'll put below yourself after killing everyone you've ever known has got to get lonely.

Not that I think Bill truly saw ford as an equal, Absolutely Not, but I think Bill saw in Ford someone who could understand him. Someone who, at least for a short time, just simply enjoyed and appreciated his company as a friend. Maybe even a more naive version of Bill himself who hasn't yet realized what's good for him, which is really ironic because Ford is the one ended up stirring his life into a positive direction where he can be truly happy again, while Bill revels in his own misery.

Well. So much about this eleven second long scene I think about way too hard 👍

Bill then goes into his whole tangent about just trying to free the dimension of restrictions and making it into a fun and better world which is reflected in the Journal 3 messages from earlier and ends up on this:

Because this is what Bill believes to be Ford's ideal. He wants knowledge and admiration? Why here you go! Surely there's no reason Ford wouldn't agree to helping Bill now, right?? He's offering him everything he could ever want! He'd be part of his group! Everyone gets what they want!

And again, yeah Bill could've just made things up and immediately tossed Ford to the side as soon as he would've given him the equation to break the barrier, but that little scene where he talks to Ford about his old home dimension just. Really drives it home for me that he does in some way truly sees Ford as his friend. Y'know, on top of literally everything else I talked about here.

-

EDIT: Like the fool I am, I forgot to bring up a point about Bill keeping Ford alive during Weirdmageddon despite Ford posing a huge threat to him which is odd but uuh just read this, it pretty much covers it.

[alexas-fandom-and-random-blog]

I need to get it out of my chest so here's some Striker theories/speculations fandom has come up with that I heavily dislike and why.

Striker has some royalty blood from one parent or both.

Oh God that would suck so much if it became canon cause it absolutely defeats the purpose of his character so far, that of being a lower class imp hating royals with valid reasons even if his actions are violent and sadistic.

As he is he has such an interesting antagonistic role in the story and offers a bunch of good lines directly opposing and questioning the heroes values, choices and morality.

His mere presence and open bashing of the upper class is just good social commentary! If his hatred stems from a combination of his narcissistic nature and bitterness that being born an imp (even mixed or hybrid) robs him from ascending further into the social ladder or even if he survived a traumatic encounter with a royal as its implied and it's fuelled by anger or a combo of all those things all are good for telling a compelling story! All can be done in very interesting ways!

But making him yet another character tied closer to royalty than just being a random person that got screwed over is honestly an underwhelming concept.

Getting screwed over for no good or justified reason should be common with Hell's racist and classist system as its been presented so far and we should get confirmation of that instead of having Striker added to the trend of each of the main characters having special connections with higher ups. It's not only redundant at this point but would make his motivation and social commentary that much weaker.

I swear if it just becomes another daddy or mommy issue imma rage quit so fast!

Striker is half shark demon

His sound design is explicitly constantly emulating the noises a rattlesnake makes. Since he's most likely a hybrid and he says to Blitzo how they are "superior to most of our kind" he's definitely part imp. So we got two halves and we got snake demon and imp, so it's basically covered? lol I don't know how this theory became so popular😅

He doesn't even look close to the design of the other sharks

he only looks like Chaz a little bit.

And lots of characters share similar characteristics like that snout.

This one had some merit with the ringed eyes and imma be real I haven't noticed those elsewhere but like even if he had a grandpa shark what purpose would that serve?

Bah I just don't like it. Let the man be a slimy snake! Its more unique and it suits him better!

Striker is asexual cause he got grossed out by sex jokes

No...just no..

To be clear you could totally read him as asexual! But the reason being the damn sex jokes is giving me whiplash. Striker got flustered and frustrated at best cause the timing of each sex joke was inappropriate as all hell and cause everyone did it as he tried to be intimidating and threaten/kill them. If anything they were bruises to his ego not any indication to his libido.

But like... In all seriousness asexual confirmation deserves more than a reaction to sex jokes.

Hellaverse does it better with Alastor. In his case it does tie in with his sexuality.

Same goes with all the theories that he's homophobic too.

He did the sexy villain thing trying to seduce Blitzo like so explicitly and smiled when Blitzo called it hot then! What are you talking about?

Different situation, more receptive to sexual undertones and instigating them too. That's what I'm trying to say!

And again. Asexual reading can apply. But it can't be just the sex jokes alright?!😭

(yeah yeah it's a joke on itself. still valid I get it.)

Striker is related to Crimson and Moxxie.

Oh this one is the worst one and absolutely gives me a heart attack and thank goodness for the crew's soft confirmation that they aren't via strixxie fanart cause no joke I'd cry since its my favourite ship!

It's just similar horns!!! Striker was designed as a mix between Moxxie and Blitzo and that's the only reason why!

Striker also had sexual tension with Blitzo on screen are you gonna tell me they are related too cause he was designed with half of him in mind?

I hate this theory so much.

Granted purely for shipping reasons but holy shit it got popular and I hated that!

I've had enough with turning every ship into potential incest just cause and harassing fans over it!

Got such "Fizz and Blitzo are siblings" deja vu😬

Ahem...

Anyways yeah that's all.

To end it more positively I love the snake man! Didn't spot him on the trailer but still hope we see him in the upcoming episodes🥺

Preferably doing shit like this and traumatizing everyone lmao! (with no godawful statue jokes in sight thank you very much)

[castlebyersafterdark]

'its quite concerning'

is it? or are you making it so?

if mike doesnt have scenes with el, it'll be a disservice to the show. i want closure, connection for them.

'talks of...' FROM WHOOOOO i mean. the same old rumour mill, snore. gullible just isnt something i wanna be. even if true... i mean, pics or it didnt happen doesnt even apply here cos like vinny said, we have no context. so nothing actually matters until we see the show.

moral of the story is: everyone needs to learn how to wait.

oh but also, mike finding will after losing el? could be classic, could be beautiful. its a common love story. only milevens are poisoning that notion to make it seem like will was second. if you wanna be literal about it, will already IS second. but we know that that doesnt matter, because.... context.

y'all are looking so bored. couldnt be me, we've got our imaginations. so much more interesting than leaks. maybe create, write, anything else than spiral into false concern

I think a problem I'm finding in the Byler fandom is that people feel in order for Byler to succeed as a possibility - El must disappear from the plot completely. And hey, this is coming from an El neutral fan. I don't love her, but I don't hate her. My gripe is: 1) She gets too much screen time and I'd like to have seen other characters get more and her less 2) her scenes often feel a bit repetitive and dragged out and 3) her relationship with Mike needs to change (and I believe it will in season 5). She's an important character and her story is important to the show. Her and Will have a connection, her and Mike have a connection. We are working towards those true connections. Her family. And a friend. El can and will and should have meaningful moments with Mike. Closure. Discovering that their love isn't what they tried for, what they thought it should be. Mike does love El. The point is "but not like that." Hasn't that been our whole point this entire time?

Mike and El having scenes together does not concern me. They should be having scenes together. And if these theories are true and El is gone somehow - set opinion aside - Mike should be grieving. That's an important person gone, that's a friend lost. Does not mean anything against Byler's legitimacy. Mike and El could break up in the first episode and the rest of the season is Mike and Will together on their journey and then the whole cast comes together at the end. The El factor does not have to determined by romance.

And there's something really beautiful, you're right, about working for and fighting towards and discovering yourself and making a change. Second love is a valid love. Understanding different types of love. I think there's a lot of passion and devotion to this pairing - I'm there, too!! But it would be so boring if it was easy. Mike and El break up and immediately Will and him get together, yay. All for what? That's not great entertainment. I want them to overcome and struggle and learn and it to feel cathartic and real when they get together.

The easy path does not need televised.

"Talks of"... I really have a lot of patience and I truly mean this as a way to deliver some kindness: stop focusing so much on what people in certain online spaces are "saying." We're all different flavors of fans. I'm too based in reality and logic and common sense to devote much time to things that frankly, are being perpetuated by people on an app and fandom corner I don't respect for many many reasons. Love yourselves!! Focus on what's real in this fandom. The internet is very dangerous in that it makes you want to believe everything you read. Becoming gullible to readily available information is part of the addiction of social media. No!! Many have worded it better than I have. Anyway, twitter is not a place of truth or happiness. Focus on the things that are interesting and fun and bring joy. That's alllllllllll I have to say.

[liquidstar]

i think something important we all have to remember about characters is that they are not real. but they are symbolic representations of types of humans. especially when you incorporate fantasy into the mix, where these representations become a bit less literal.

so, like, when you have characters that are immortal/ageless/reincarnations/vampires/whatever, who are, on paper, much older than they actually look... it really just comes down to "if they walk like a duck and talks like a duck, then it's probably a duck."

basically what i mean is if a character is functionally a teenager within a story, emotionally and societally and such, then for all intents and purposes they ARE a teenager. because the thing that they are coded to symbolize is a teenager. regardless of fantasy factors that dont exist in the real world. maybe the closest thing is someone who is an adult but looks young (i still get mistaken for 16, its a struggle) but thats a false equivalence, you are still an adult, you cant be coded as a teenager as if this was a story (though you can certainly be immature lol).

conversely, "1000 year old dragon lolis" are coded as children. they represent children. no matter how many spins you try to put on it, that is a symbolic representation of a child. there's a huge difference between the reality of an adult who just happens to look young, and the fantasy of a child who by some loophole can consent. because thats the intent the character was created with.

obviously im not saying this applies to ALL characters who are immortal children though. it can be used for all types of different effects, like, for example, pride in fullmetal alchemist mangahood uses this to enhance his Creepyness factor, due to the disconnect between his appearance and his demeanor. he walks like a duck but doesnt talk like a duck. there are for sure ways to do this trope that arent creepy in the other sense.

same thing goes for immortal teenagers- once you introduce a power imbalance into the mix that makes them functionally just an adult who looks young, thats when the dynamic can begin to feel creepy. and its a tricky thing to pull off, because you have to balance the immortality with the teenager-ness, and it seems like lots of life experience will often contradict the latter. but its not impossible (at least in writing). a character can be more knowledgeable without having power over the other, and i think it largely comes down to how theyre treated socially too. if they have just as much power as any other teenager in their society, then theres not really an imbalance. how theyre treated by other characters will inform the viewers on how to treat them by extension.

like, weird example, but the vampire girl from hotel transylvania (i forgot her name, i watched it when i was 12) is like 100 years older than her love interest. but shes still a pretty stereotypical teenager who has to listen to adam sandler her father, and has the same amount of power in this situation as any other teenager would. the movie sets up the leads as being on the same level socially so theres no issue (this may have been made extra clear because its a kids movie, which is why its an easy example). contrast this with twlight where edward obviously has power over bella specifically due to his vampire-ness, and thats why their dynamic is one that many people find uncomfortable because the fantasy age gap plays a part in this.

but yeah at the end of the day thats why id never, like, call c.c from code geass a pedophile for kissing lelouch (utilitarian reasons or otherwise), but that's also exactly why i'd call isekai man #208 a pedophile for having a loli love interest. these characters are not real, they are symbols. you cannot take symbols literally (thats oxymoronic) by just looking at the numbers of their ages, you have to look at what they represent of the real world inside the story. what does this fantasy immortal SAY about age and such. what do their actual dynamics reflect in the real world.

fiction isnt reality, but its a mirror that reflects it. sometimes a funhouse mirror, but you can still see whats being reflected if you look closely.

anyway please dont take this as any sort of discourse, i really am just musing about how fiction Works, and how different tropes apply in different ways and such. this isnt a response to anything or anyone im just thinking out loud. peace ✌️

[chevelleneech]

https://www.tumblr.com/chevelleneech/759715569566105600/a-little-while-ago-i-posted-about-how-although-i?source=share

Samee like i don't ship them like that, they could reveal their partners tomorrow for all i care but I'm interested in knowing what they think/feel about eachother lol

About the military though ngl i used to think they had it all planned for long time nd all but after seeing their conversation in car where they said they didn't really met up much n all i was like okay maybe enlisting together was never in their head at that point so i was more curious to know how do you go from "we didn't meet/call eachother" on July 14th to applying for Buddy program at the end of Aug or start of sept like that's just 1.5 months difference. I mean if I'm not exactly much in touch with someone why would i make a plan to enlist with that person? I'm not saying by not meeting often jm and jk became awkward or strangers but all members have gone individually, RM- tae did their training together ig(correct me on this one) so jikook should also think of Enlisting individually right? like that's what's first would come to ur mind......Why would my mind go to something that k-pop idols haven't done before? like jikook are literally the first two idols to use companion system for their enlistmemt so how did that come to their mind?

Then i wonder about jk's comment of him wanting to join special force which is again very known thing to armys like that's what you'd expect from him so that ain't surprising but then why did he not go to special force? is it because of tattoes? cause ig some ppl can't go there if they have visible tattoes, but some says they can go to some units of specific force even with tattoes so which one is correct? I have seen ppl from special force with tattoes like jk's but their whole service was yrs long nd not just 1.5 yrs...so again what's the reason? Has jk talked with V about joining special force? Had him and V ever talked about joining special force together? Given tae is also in special force. I'm pretty sure tae got the idea of special force because of one of his wooga frnd cause he's also done special force.

Has someone suggested this to them? does this decision has something to do with mental health? taemin had faced some things in military because of which he was sent to social service mid service ig so was jm worrying about that? is it something that concerns jk's mental health? Was it because they wanted to be around eachother? Or was it because they thought rather than being alone in MS it's better to be with your frnd nd that way they could depend on e/o for emotional support. I wanna know how they came to that decision. See the decision was Mutual is given cause if not they simply wouldn't apply but I'd love to know the reason behind it.

I don’t want to to touch on everything you said, simply because I will talk for days and lose my train of thought.

However, I think the biggest points are the fact that as you said, it is interesting that two people who from their own mouths are saying they didn’t meet up nor call each other as often as they used to, decided to do a joint enlistment. Of course, JM and JK had known each other for a decade by the time they chose to enlist, so it’s very possible they did choose the buddy system before separating in 2023. It is possible they reconnected because they knew this was what they chose, and they didn’t want to go into it, if they got it, with much distance between them. There’s no way to know if they decided after Connecticut or before, because they’re not going to tell us why they drifted for a bit.

As for their enlistment overall, I too wonder what their motivation was. I said it think it’s because they simply do not like being apart, and I stand by that thought, but you are right in wondering what it might actually be.

They did not have to enlist together. None of the other members even went at the same time except Tae and Joon, and given how much closer Tae and JK seemed during 2023, you’d assume they would have chosen the buddy system, but they didn’t. Why? I don’t know. It’s possible Tae wanted to do something that he wouldn’t qualify for had he done BS, but I don’t think it’s a tattoos though, as I saw someone say JK would have still been eligible for special forces.

I don’t know the detail of it of course, but let’s say for arguments sake JK couldn’t enlist in certain divisions because of his tattoos, Jimin’s arms are clear. All his tattoos except his moons (which are easily covered) are small, so he wouldn’t have had the same limitations as Jungkook. Unless the rules prohibit wrist/finger tattoos. But again, his are so small, a long enough sleeve covers his wrist, and unless he’s constantly waving and giving high fives, I don’t see how those would be an issue.

So without digging too deep, just on the surface, it’s hard to conclude they used the buddy system for any reason other than, they wanted to ensure they were together if possible. Especially since their company has no say.

Is it possible they have more mental health things going on than we know? Absolutely, and that could easily be a factor, but we can’t just decide that and run with it. They’ve both said they’re grateful to have the other by their side during this time, and again, we know now that leading up to the application date and their enlistment in general, they made the choice to be with each other for multiple trips.

Meaning, dating or not, they knew what was coming down the line and chose 1) to travel together to reconnect after a bit of time apart, and 2) to at least try and get approved for joint service.

Therefore, I’m back to the only conclusion I’ve got, lol. Jimin and Jungkook didn’t want to be separated. Because you, me, and anyone else with common sense has pointed out, they didn’t need to use the buddy system to join at the same time. Nor was it a guarantee anyway, so calling it fan service or a business decision to ensure BTS all came back by 2025, is illogical. Because had they been denied, they would have had to enlist alone, no matter their state of mental health or what was paid to them by the company, you know?

The buddy system only works because they got it, so nothing else could have spurred it since it wasn’t a shoe-in. It was literally them playing the lottery, because they wanted to try and be together. Why? That’s the mystery, lol.

[genericmain]

Anyways guys gals and nonbinary pals.. The Topsy brain rot be real, and while this all stemmed from a pocket love thing, this particular character feels more fleshed out and "real" than H did so I don't know what that means or how it'll affect things going forward but...

Topsy!

Infodump under the cut. I couldn't help myself.

Also, as always, -> not proship friendly, sorry.

Also she is non-sharing jic idk how common it is for people to be like ah yes this oc f/o is mine too.

She picked her name herself, and refuses to tell anyone her dead name - after all she had it legally changed. Anyone who's attempted to find the info, gets buried in a mountain of paperwork so large it's almost comical. She's non-verbal majority of the time as she is selectively mute, Ie she only really talks to me, and while the general look of her mime make up doesn't change (nor does it come off) she can have varying styles of makeup! This is the one she had on while I was doing this project, but she has a more stereotypical mime makeup, and more avant garde ones as well, which I may get around to creating designs of, but most likely I'll leave it up to your imagination as it's kind of a lot. Personality wise, she's shy, anxious (to the point it's probably a disorder, She has a tendency to pick at the skin around her nails), compassionate, kind, and passionate about what she loves. She can be sassy, a bit hot headed, and short tempered, but that's due to the same passion she applies to creative projects. She doesn't know how "good" it is, but she does paint, and draw - the only thing she's never done is a self potrait. She doesn't like mirrors, to the point that I think she'd remove or crack the mirror in the bathroom in headspace if she didn't have her own. We've made a deal to cover it with a towel if she ever needs to use the main bathroom instead. (For anyone asking why headspace has mirrors and the like, because it's sometimes easier to look in a mirror than to outwardly identify who's here sadly. As for bathrooms... Call it normalcy. Our headspace is a house, mainly.) She usually dresses casually, rather than fancy, and she does incorporate color, the clothing options available just don't suit her style. Her favorite ice cream is cookie dough, and she's a big fan of finger foods but doesn't love pizza. She likes cats, but hasn't had the chance to really own a cat or interact with them much, and has a lot of intrusive/anxious thoughts about accidentally picking cats up wrong, or hurting them, so she mostly just admires them on social media rn. She likes all kinds of colors, but I think her favorite might be dusty blue? She has a lot of stuff in that color, so if it's not, I'd like to replace it eventually. She does own the traditional stripey outfit of a mime, but she prefers to wear a light pink and white striped turtle neck, with either a cute light pink skirt, or some black ripped faux jeans. While she has other options, those seem to be the things she wears most often, depending on how appropriate it is to do so. She also has an off the shoulder cowl neck hybrid in a similar style, which she pairs with a black tank top underneath. She's fairly fashion forward, just focusing on mixing mime fashion + a little bit of clowncore with pastel goth/punk goth aesthetic. She seems to enjoy reading, but will put down a book anytime someone sees her (including me) and tends to blush at "being caught reading" I don't know much about her home life, but I know that in addition to the scarring from picking her nail skin, she has these deep scars (healed) on her hands, and various other deep scars on her body. With strangers, she's self conscious about them, but with me, she's admitted she's proud of surviving, and views them as proof of that, rather than something to be ashamed of. (Not SH scars - jic it needs saying.) She's a confident, sassy, powerful woman when we're together, but she can quickly become shaky and unsure of herself depending on the circumstances, so watching her flourish has been a joy. Despite *literally* being created recently, She definitely feels like a wife and not a girlfriend, in the sense of, I feel like we've been married for years, and together even longer. So I'll be calling her my Mime wife from here on out! Not to be confused with IRL wife!

I don't think she's human despite her appearence suggesting that, given the permanent, shifting, mime makeup but tbh? Slay. We love a non-human character here.

I'll probably add more as time goes on but yeah, Meet my mime wife! I love her! If you'd told me a year ago I've have a clown adjacent character as a F/O I would've asked if this was a bad joke (I'm afraid of clowns) but here we are, and she's not the least bit scary, which is good.

[suffarustuffaru]

I'd love to hear more about Otto and Natsumi Schwartz if you have anymore thoughts on them

hah once again ty for all the cool asks its been fun answering them :o !! and arghhhhh otto and natsumi......................................... i have many thoughts.

ive been planning on making a comprehensive otto queer analysis post for a while - just bc i think my thoughts on reading otto as queer are kinda spread across different posts of mine HAH and i dont normally write very formally with proper grammar in most of my analysis posts, even (...i normally save that for my school essays...... </3) but id love to make an actual formal analysis just for the topic of queer otto bc i have been Gathering Evidence!! making theories!! otto's whole judging attitude towards natsumi is definitely part of it.

and also i do have fic wips in the works abt these sorts of topics!! i am publishing one sometime this month or early next month!!

anyway i went over like my theory on otto being a little fixated on normalcy in asks like this one.... which is yknow due to being an outcast his entire life so then he ends up overcorrecting a little (see: him insisting on wearing green bc he thinks itll help him look approachable) but then he never fits in anywhere Except for the emilia camp anyway so :,))

that, and. you would Think that otto wouldnt give a shit bc of his dp. like animal biology is soo widely different between different animals, biological sex can be a little complicated at times (like. snails. for example) and of course animals all work Really differently, but also sometimes animals will have sex with other members of their species with the same sex (like bats. or giraffes.) so its like. Yes, human sex and gender and sexuality and human concepts of these things are Not comparable to animals but its still like - these are natural things, you know? and ottos talked with lots of animals and probably seen a bit of shit, so you would expect him not to be homophobic or transphobic or anything right?

and i think on one level he would recognize human sex, gender, and sexuality as natural things, bc they are, but i also think otto still has internalized shit going on from all the times hes struggled with learning social rules and how human connection works as he was growing up, id say. i remember how in my. um. "how homophobic would rz characters be" tier list i had to move otto UP a tier into the same tier as FERRIS AND SUBARU.... in the DEALING WITH INTERNALIZED SHIT tier..... yes. i have reasons for doing that yep!!

so. in three idiots goddess statue episode, garf otto and subaru of course crossdress to go to this party with roswaal for Reasons!!!! and ottos got a bit of an attitude about the crossdressing ok. just gonna leave some excerpts from there regarding otto's feelings on natsumi and crossdressing:

She is a thin woman with wavy gray hair and beautiful ornaments. She has a neutral face, but the lightly applied makeup enhances her good looks. She looks so good in a dress that exposes her thin white shoulders that it is a shame that she walks with her head down.

Natsumi: “So, how long are you going to keep your mouth shut? Don't you think it's time to make up your mind?” Audrey: “I'm more curious as to why you're so adamant about this!” Natsumi: “Oh-ho-ho-ho” Audrey blushed and yelled at Natsumi, who put her hand over her mouth and laughed loudly. However, in no time at all. Audrey immediately covered her face with her hands, as if ashamed of herself. Audrey: “How could this happen? If I knew there had been two other people besides me, I wouldn't have had to resort to such emergency measures! I've been tricked!"

Needless to say, it was Garfiel who was dressed as the blonde woman, and Otto as the gray-haired woman. And the last one, Natsumi Schwartz, was the one who… Subaru: “So she's the temporary form of Natsuki Subaru, as you know.” Otto: “Um, how come you're so smooth and perfect? Even your voice has changed, hasn't it?” Subaru: “Actually, I failed once before because I couldn't change my voice. Ever since then, I've been practicing for a chance at revenge.”

Subaru: “Did you actually have a secret desire to dress as a woman? So you took this opportunity to......?” Otto: “don’t look at me like you've just found out the terrible truth!” Otto spat and screamed at Subaru's shocked face. Then, while he was breathing hard. Otto: “Your crazy prediction is way off! I really only did what Ram asked me to do. I thought I was doing the camp a favor, and this is how they treat me!” Subaru: “Wow, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, calm down. Look, you're ruining your pretty face....…” Otto: “Shut up”

With the men calling out to her one after another, Audrey left the crowd and took a breath. She wanted to sit on the balcony and enjoy the cool breeze to cool down the heat of the party. To be honest, since we entered the venue, the men have been constantly coming at us with no time to rest. Audrey had heard that this was a place to meet people, but the hunt of a hungry wolf is insatiable. They are so hungry that they are even blinded by the gender of the person in front of them. If they don't develop a better eye for women, even if they do meet someone, they will probably end up unhappy. Or is it that "good"?  Audrey: “Hmm, makeup is scary. I can see how men can turn into....…”

Audrey glanced toward the center of the hall. There, as usual, Natsumi was having a good time chatting with many of the participants. She was so excited that she could be heard shouting over and over again. Garnet: “Captain...... No, not so much as a lady” Audrey: “I really wonder what's going on with that guy....... I'm worried that he won't respond to me calling him Natsuki-San anymore.”

Gwain: “No, no, no, enough is enough. You ladies are beautiful, especially that dark-haired girl, Natsumi Schwartz. She's got the youngsters by the balls. She's a bad girl.” Audrey: “Ha-ha-ha.” Audrey couldn't help but let out a hearty laugh and failed to look feminine.

Then, smiling with her hand over her mouth, is a woman with distinctive mean looking eyes. With her unusual black hair and jet-black dress, she exudes elegance in her demeanor. Perhaps it's because she's a good talker and a good listener, but she seems to be able to swim through the social scene with ease, laughing and creating a friendly atmosphere even when surrounded by several men.  I couldn't decide whether I should be impressed or dismayed by her versatility. A short distance away, a sharp-looking blonde woman silently waved away the men who approached her, creating a stark contrast between the light and dark of the people involved. And to those of us on the sidelines, watching the scene…

anyway so. thats a whole lot of excerpts and theres probably at least a little bit more in that ss that i didnt put in this post hah.... and i know that you could definitely interpret these scenes in a few different ways, and also that when youre writing about gender, your feelings on it are likely to bleed into the text a bit and so some of stuff like otto being a Bit of an Asshole in this ss might just be tappei's tappei-isms also (which is most likely the case for stuff like this entire ss tbh :,)) ) but. but i do think theres Something here to be analyzed in regards to otto!!

bc like. lbr. i really doubt that otto is Straight. i really really doubt that hes straight, and i feel like theres just so so much possible gay subtext behind whatever the hell ottos feelings for subaru are thatre scattered across side content and the main story HAH...... this isnt even my ottosuba bias talking, its genuinely what i think could be happening here. and lbr if otto was female everyone and their mother would be shipping ottosuba more i think haha.

but yeah anyway otto shows up being a little...... wack..... about crossdressing??? HM. hmmmmmmmmmmmmm. but also the rezero fantasy world seems to be rather Judgmental about these sorts of things anyway so. :,)))

but i am squinting HARD at "I'm worried that he won't respond to me calling him 'Natsuki-san' anymore".............. and the hungry wolf part......... im squinting at it for multiple reasons (tappei being tappei) (.....but also WHAT is going on in otto's head...)..... "I couldn't decide whether I should be impressed or dismayed by her versatility."............

anyway. i think this could be several possiblities....

otto is once again focused on what's considered "normal" and is focused on trying to at least Attempt to fit into societal ideas of normalcy so when he sees subaru whos this absolutely chaotic and bold person whos also like Queer In Every Direction, otto's brain basically shortcircuits. hes like "wtf how are you doing that. you cant do that. thats not allowed. youre so confident about this too. wtf" (ie: ............otto is transphobic.) (this is 1ooo% the most likely option)

otto is gay for subaru and subaru dressing as a woman gives otto a little bit of a bi crisis. natsumis a bad girl thats got youngsters by the balls, you see. also bc subaru called otto pretty and otto was immediately like "SHUT UP" like T^TT

otto is gay for subaru and subaru dressing as a woman gives otto a tiny itty bitty crisis bc if subaru's sex was female and if subaru was 100% a woman then liking subaru romantically would be a million times easier bc then its societally acceptable

otto, being a bit of a manipulative asshole, goes "hm. subaru-as-natsumi effortlessly charming the room? interesting. i approve of the political maneuvering."

otto is being an asshole, once again, to complain, once again, about all the work he Willingly Does for his friends

................................................gender envy???????

or feeling off bc hes uncomfortable crossdressing just bc of that mismatch between his gender presentation and his gender yknow

otto is feminine/androgynous, so could he have been made fun of for this in the past?????????????????? does he ever get uncomfy about that?????????????????????? not being traditionally masculine??????? bc otto easily passes as a woman when hes crossdressing?????????

a mix of a few of the above options!!!!!

but yeah like. ottos clearly ashamed and embarrassed to be crossdressing. he's also been mistaken for a woman in the past (in subaru's pov) bc yknow hes very androgynous. and also otto gets Really Fucking Defensive when subaru insinuates that otto couldve wanted to dress as a woman also this entire time. the "youre ruining your pretty face..." "shut up." exchange is SOOOO.... T^TT

(and also quick side note but i think ottos stance on queerness is "i dont think its personally wrong. except that i think its wrong Societally bc society will be a bitch about it!! too much Trouble and Work For Me!!!! " :,)))) fucking bitch. thanks otto </333)

and im sure the "I'm worried that he won't respond to me calling him 'Natsuki-san' anymore" line is a dig at subaru passing so so strongly as natsumi that ottos like "urgh hes more of a Woman now" or smth :,))))) however!! its also interesting just bc "natsuki-san" is like. otto turned it into a pet name. basically. like at this point. even though he and subaru have grown closer during and after arc 4 otto Still uses "natsuki-san" - its kind of special, yknow? dude turned that into a fond nickname. so its like..................... if you squint.... why is otto basically saying "will subaru being natsumi drive him away from me..." like im gonna slap otto across the face i swear HAHA. but also otto Does use "natsumi-san" towards natsumi as well but im still. squinting hard at that. "natsuki-san" is The original pet name, after all.

and also the hungry wolf lines... like i know the intent of that is like. otto as audrey keeps getting hit on by guys at this party bc shes attractive, right, with her dress and makeup and styled hair and all that. insert tappei's tappei-isms here. but ottos musing on this like "mm.... men can be so hungry in their romantic pursuits that they'd be blind to the true gender of the person theyre hitting on...... makeup can really do such a thing huh... turns men into Animals..." and its like. hm. otto. you know. i Wonder. i really wonder my guy after hearing about you be obsessive over subaru for like three arcs!!!!!!!!!!

as for ottos gender like. dude is cisgender in canon im sure. though i definitely think its fun to explore genderqueer interpretations of him - and even then, i think even if he isnt genderqueer, i think there might be a bit of shock or even envy, if you squint, at otto seeing subaru so flamboyant and way more confident about crossdressing while ottos over here ducking his head and red with embarrassment while natsumi is absolutely OWNING it. despite the judgment otto and other people are giving!!! otto could Never. it completely blows ottos mind a little, from the looks of it. "how come youre so smooth and perfect?", the defensiveness at subaru saying otto couldve secretly wanted to dress as a woman, "i couldnt decide whether to be impressed or dismayed", and of course it all goes back to subaru being in the spotlight and otto watching from the sidelines. in the Darkness, you could say. hahahaahahahah................. subaru who gets easily into trouble and seems so so shameless about things while ottos so distressed about it.... about every little thing................

but also i do have another running theory that subaru's masculinity issues and otto's androgyny do clash a little just bc. well subarus judged ferris a bit before - "what part of you is like a man?" iirc is the line from arc 4 wn that subaru said to ferris. and subaru can feel more confident bc hey.... im more masculine than a guy like otto, right? otto, who can easily be mistaken for a girl? but im sure subaru would be a little jealous, even. maybe. bc woah. i want to pass as a girl when i decide to dress as one. and then yknow ottos being a dick abt it. maybe its a "im a man and Not a woman" (cisgender man who is uncomfortable dressing as a woman and knows this is not for him) thing too or maybe its a "im a man and Not a woman, so doing this is stupid and beneath me" (internalized/not internalized transphobia????????????) thing???????

yeah so idk i feel like theres different ways to read this fr especially when. haah..................... otto is Not Straight for subaru. thats for sure.

so why are you being an asshole about your crush crossdressing????????? why does it kind of threaten you a bit???????????????????????? why are you behaving this way????????????????????

but if you think about it i do think that maybe. at the heart of all of this. otto is just upset at the Impossibility of him and subaru being together (in any sense of that word) bc theyre so similar but so so different and it makes them clash in every way. :,))))

[unfamiliaris]

1,9,13, and 15 for the ask thing!!! <3

YAYYY THANKS

1. what are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are?

Dogs and wolves are number one, seriously. As a kid, I bonded with my first real best friend over our shared love of wolves, and I would talk to anyone I could about dogs. When times were hard for me, I could count on my dogs to be there. Studying dogs and wolves more closely has helped me to better understand people through the lens of animal behaviour, and has led me to my current job which is the only one I've ever had that's truly fulfilled me. I think about dogs and wolves often, and without my love of them I don't think I'd be who I am. secondly, my father. I don't think I could ever be the person I am without him. he is the most kind and empathetic person I've ever met, who taught me the value of doing good deeds in my community and in my family without needing to be asked. his kindness is infectious and makes me feel good to help others, and the relationship I have with him is one I wouldn't trade for the world. my only tattoo (as of now anyway!) is one I got because it reminded me of him. I can show it off if anyone wants to see, lol. for my last thing though, I'd have to go with an easy answer, one that applies to pretty much everyone: the internet. I'm a very socially averse person - not by choice - and have always found it extremely difficult to put myself out into the real world and meet people. online, I've been able to meet people from all over the world who have offered me perspectives and kindness I couldn't have found in my local community, even if I weren't too cowardly to look. my best friends in the world are people I never would have met in my life without the internet, and they've all shaped me in ways I don't think even I'll fully comprehend.

9. tell a story about your childhood

this ones a bit bittersweet, but this is always the memory that comes to mind when someone wants to hear an anectdote about my childhood. the last time I ever saw my childhood dog was a rainy day, when I was eleven years old. my parents are divorced, and the dog was my dad's, so I only got to see him every other weekend. but we were the same age when they adopted him, and so we were both eleven then. I had no way of knowing it would be the last time I ever saw him - as a child, I couldn't note any symptoms of anything to come, and it's not as if anyone would have told me. he liked to try and jump on me, but at his age and weight all he could do was rear up on his hind legs like an old horse. a few winters prior, my dad had built the old man a doghouse of his own, with a porch and a heater to keep him warm. it was a sunday, and we were playing in the yard. or, as much playing as he could do anymore. I didn't really mind him being slow. as a baby, they'd set me on his back and pretend to let me ride him. I was more than okay carrying his weight this time around. but it started to rain hard after not too long - and PNW rain storms are no light business. but I didn't want to leave him just yet, knowing that going inside meant finding my father waiting to drive me back to my mother's, somewhere I'd rather not be. so we retreated to the doghouse - comfortable enough for us both to fit inside, my dad was kind to his dog like that - and sat there for a while. he and I were both wet and panting, staring out into the endless sheet of rain as it poured over the grass. I held him, then, seeking warmth and maybe for someone to tell me I'd be okay when I left. I remember him pressing into my chest and sighing. maybe it was then he decided he had done everything he ever wanted. my dad found me in the doghouse not long later, helping me out as I waved goodbye to my beloved yellow lump. I found out only a few days later that he had passed in his sleep. peaceful, just fell asleep and never woke up. I sometimes wonder if, in his last dream, he could hear rain pooling on an old patio roof.

13. what are you doing right now?

laying in bed. I've been awful lazy the past few days. currently snacking (cheez its) in the dark with a candle going. might pick up my copy of the terror again, though it's been a while since I've read it.

15. what do you think of when you hear the word “home”?

a doghouse.