#and i’ve seen them go from deeply in the closet and insecure to being super open about their identities and seeming so much happier

[gremlin-pattie]

i cannot express how much i have missed the gaming channel

[emmvline-blog]

˙ ˖ ✧ jennie kim, twenty-three, cisfemale, she + her // was that EMMALINE BYUN stepping aboard the GUCCI jet? oh now it’s a party! we all know they can be pretty INSOUCIANT, but also pretty OPEN-MINDED on a good day, just like an ARIES. they’ll be blasting STORMY WEATHER BY TINASHE for most of the plane ride, i can already tell. i think they added IBIZA, SPAIN to the list of places to visit this year. let’s pop the champagne and get going!

trigger/content warnings: divorce, child neglect

hi babes! i’ve been so excited for this group to open so i could bring my absolute awful trash princess to life.  she’s a total sasshole & is basically the product of money and a ton of trauma. a good fourteen years of her life were spent in the middle of a bitter divorce battle between her parents. her father was an exec for a record label, and her mom was a former model who seemed to know where every single skeleton in her ex-husband’s closet was located. that fact alone kept hefty alimony payments sent her way, and a blood feud between them that seemed never ending.

half the time, emmaline felt more like a pawn in their games rather than their actual daughter. any time spent with either of her parents would always wind up the same way: they’d grill her for information about the other, and create some sort of horrific narrative of them that emmaline was far too young to hear. fortunately, she spent more time with nannies and other employees of her parents’ than them, and whenever she’d question it, they’d just shower her in opulence any child would wish upon stars for. she knew nothing but being rewarded for venom and toxicity for much of her life, and the bulk of her behavior began to reflect the things she witnessed.

she constantly acted out in school; taking things from other children because she felt she was entitled to them, trying to embarrass any teacher who gave her a bad grade, her demeanor only growing colder as she aged. her parents didn’t do much to correct it, they’d only give her more presents to keep her quiet. as unfazed as she appeared to be, the fact that her parents didn’t seem to care about being around her or getting to know her was deeply hurtful. she figured if she had to feel that way, why not spread the misery around? of course it wasn’t the right thing to do, but the very people who were supposed to set an example did nothing but tear each other down. and she was nothing if not her parents daughter.

here are some skuhtistics

name: emmaline hana byun age: twenty - three gender/pronouns: cisfemale & she/her occupation: LOL like this bitch works sexual orientation: bisexual romantic orientation: biromantic social class: upper height: 5 ft 2 in weight: 116 lbs hair color: dark brown eye color: brown aesthetics: shimmering lipsticks, worn out credit cards, butterfly doors, corinthian column bed frames, black marble, gem encrusted high heels, lace bustiers, getting drunk in high end boutiques, backstabbing, twin holidays. hogwarts house: slytherin alignment: neutral evil mb: isfj favorite food: duck confit favorite cocktail: flaming volcano (will 100% try to house it by herself) favorite movie: st. elmo’s fire

i would really love any of the following connections for her!!

best frenemies - heavily inspired by this gifset. these two are each other’s closest friends and most bitter enemies. emmaline is extremely competitive and has a major inferiority complex so while she’ll smile in this person’s face and gossip with them about other people and do all the things annoyingly self-centered best friends do, she’ll also trash them behind their back, sabotage them at every turn and get extremely jealous anytime they get something she doesn’t, and vice versa honestly. i just want a super toxic dynamic where they both lowkey hate each other, but keep each other close regardless. whatchamacallit - inspired by this post, this post. romance has always just been a game to emmaline. her sexual partners are nothing more than toys for her to pass her time with. she is a legit fuckgrrl. this (and most of her other issues) stems from trauma she suffered as a child due to her parents’ highly tumultuous divorce that took up her formative years and beyond. she was used as a pawn in their battles with each other for over a decade, and it dealt a tremendous blow to her comfort with herself. she deflects this with an inflated ego and a lot of big talk, but i would absolutely love for there to be someone around her who renders those fort knox defenses completely inoperable. for her to have finally met her match, after years of playing cat and mouse with people’s feelings. to actually, maybe, possibly care for someone; another actual human?? and for it to make her so angry inside that she can barely stand to be around them, or she’ll get too flustered and start cussing someone. *chef’s kiss*

get in loser, we’re going shopping 1/?? - based on this post. just a big ol’ squad? THE BIGGEST SQUAD OF FRIENDS/ACQUAINTANCES PLS? emmaline is insecure, she literally always has to have people around her. shopping trips, yacht excursions, tropical vacays, ski weekends. what fun is any of it if you can’t invite ten of your dearest friends, half of whom’s name you can’t remember?? funding or planning the party has always been one of emmaline’s most tried and true ways of getting people to stick around, so a lot of superficial “friendships” based on that would be cool! - @guerrcros​

thought you were bae, turns out you were just fam - a relationship that actually ended amicably for emmaline? the fuck you say. no, it really did happen, and they’re still pretty cool with each other to this day. this person knows all of her dirty laundry anyway, so it’s not like she can just dip, right?? nah but she can actually let down her defenses a bit with this person since they (for some god forsaken reason bless their heart) bothered to try and get to know her despite her treatment of them in their relationship. they learned that emmaline wasn’t all bad, she just hated feeling inferior or unimportant, and it often presented as rude comments and other venomous behavior. they also came to find that a lot of her treatment of others was a direct result of the things she’d seen her parents do to each other and say to and about one another. these things had almost been normalized in her brain, and this person actually takes the time to try and work with her on it. they have hope she’ll wake the fuck up one day and stop emulating the bad things she once saw.

and honestly maybe exes that ended badly, people she’s connected to through her parents, flirtationships, friends who constantly roast each other, neighbors who hate each other are some other things i’d love to ddu-du ddu-du. i’m honestly down for whatever so pls do lmk if you’d like to plot with this gucci garbage pail <3

[shannen-writes]

Why I love Ben and Callum (Ballum) from Eastenders

After tonight’s Eastenders I’m super emotional and wanted to talk about why I’ve come to love the Ballum relationship and what it means to me. This isn’t a well-planned or thought out post, just a stream of conciousness, fangirling and emotions, so be warned. 

At times I’ve wondered why I feel so deeply for a ship that has, let’s be honest, incredibly inconsistent (unfortunately, that’s the nature of having a ship on a soap, you have to have the patience of a saint) and had a lack of content in comparison to the ships I’m used to having from TV shows. But this week has affirmed exactly why I love Ballum so much and there are so many reasons. 

The first and obvious one is Tony Clay and Max Bowden’s chemistry. I mean have you seen that shit: 

gif credit @charitydingle

They have such a strong and natural on-screen dynamic that immedatiely pulls me in whenever I see them. There are tender scenes and moments which are so sincere, but likewise, the angsty scenes are so electric. Max and Tony deliver on it all, they really do. 

But more than the actors chemistry, the dynamic between Ben and Callum is fascinating to me. They have so much in common - toxic and unloving fathers, a homophobic family, self-loathing, insecurities and a desperate want for true love, affection and connection. A central aspect of Ben’s character has always been his struggles with his sexuality. At first it was accepting it within his own mind and embracing it as being part of who he was, and since then it’s been enduring the ignorance, hatred, violence and cruelty of the people around him who refuse to accept him being gay because of their prejudices and let’s face it, pure idiocy. 

Callum is now going through those exact same struggles with his sexuality that Ben did. He’s uncertain, he’s closeted, he’s afraid to accept his sexuality for the fear of how that’ll change his life and how the people around him will react (worsened by the fact that his father and brother are both massive homphobes). Ben looks at Callum and he sees himself. He sees Callum’s pain, feels it, and that’s why as much as he makes his digs and jokes about outing him, he would never ever go through with it. He knows how long, rocky and difficult that process is and he would never do anything to harm Callum. All he wants is to help and advise Callum to help prevent him having to go through the same heartbreak and hurt he did. 

As for Callum, Ben is probably the only real connection he’s ever had with another person (the exception perhaps being Chris). Although Callum’s sexuality is still unconfirmed (is he bi or is he gay?), he clearly has feelings towards men and has done for many years and has been suppressing that part of himself, denying himself from forging those kind of connections with another man that he has so desperately been craving. He spoke about how lonely he’s been and that all stems from the fact that he’s been lying to himself for so long and closing himself off to having that authentic connection with another person. He has that connection with Ben because he can be himself. He can be completely vulnerable and honest with Ben, he never has to hide, and that’s a freedom he’s never had before. 

For Ben, everybody in his life sees and assumes the worst of him, including his own family (the exception being Jay and Lexie). He feels misunderstood and unloved by everybody in his life. Callum is probably one of the only people in his life that doesn’t put him down, that doesn’t patronise, ridicule or bully him. He never judges him or scalds him, even when he acts recklessly or shows up with a bloody and bruised face (which, let’s face it, is all the flippin’ time!). Instead, he’s open, understanding and empathetic. Callum sees the good in Ben where nobody else does. He sees a passion, empathy, vulnerability and kindness that few people get to see because Callum provides him with a safe space to be who he is; something that he doesn’t get anywhere else. 

There’s an emotional connection between Ben and Callum that’s so palpable. They see into each others souls, they see reflections of themselves when they look at each other, but for all of their similarities they have differences. Those differences only bring them together even more. Ben’s temper, recklessness, impulsivity and steel exterior is offset by Callum’s tranquility, humility, softness and consideration. Callum anchors Ben, provides him with peace and clarity from the chaotic life he has. Ben even said it himself in last night’s episode, part of the reason he likes Callum is because he’s not like him. Likewise, Callum sees in Ben someone that is strong and unafraid to be exactly who he is and go for what he wants; a quality he admires and wishes he had. Ben brings passion and courage into his life, and pushes him out of his comfort zone and to embrace the parts of himself that he’s been keeping locked away for so long. They both see in each other traits and qualities they feel that they lack but admire and wish they had. These differences also mean that they balance each other other and compliment each other perfectly. 

What makes the Ballum relationship so special is because it means so much for both characters. There’s so much to unpick, so much depth but it all comes together beautifully. Their connection is so profound and the struggles they both have faced and continue to face with their sexuality resonates with so many people. The process of Ben and Callum meeting, getting to know one another and developing feelings for each other has already been so long, complicated and rocky simply because they’re gay men. It’s even harder because Callum still isn’t ready to come out (although that might be about to change after tonight’s episode). 

For me, seeing Callum cradling a dying Ben in his arms showed that emotional connection they have. Even Whitney could clearly see it! Callum wasn’t about to move from Ben’s side for a moment and Ben needed Callum. You could sense throughout all of their scenes that Ben was drawing strength from Callum and although Callum stayed calm, the reality of losing Ben hit him hard. It’s the wake up call he needed (and that we all so desperately wanted him to have), to deeply he feels for Ben and that letting him go would be a huge mistake. Callum may want the ordinary heteronormative life he could’ve had if he married Whitney, but Ben can give him everything Whitney can’t. In the short time Callum has known Ben, he’s opened up so many different sides to him that no one else ever has. Ben can see, speak, understand, support and love Callum in a way that no one else can. 

Okay, I’ll stop there because I can talk forever and ever about how much I love Ballum. So I’ll finish by saying that after this week, I really hope EE continue deliver good content, because to let them go without fully exploring all of that potential would be a terrible mistake. I’ve watched Eastenders practically my whole life on and off and I’ve never had a relationship (or characters) have as much impact on me as Ben and Callum, and I know I’m not alone. Their story is beautiful and speaks directly to my heart for so many reasons, and I have so much hope for their future. 

[stuckydealer-blog]

Final Surrender | 2

Pairing: Wintershieldshock, Steve x Darcy x Bucky

Word Count:  2,244 (Yeah, these are short. They’ll get longer eventually)

Genre & Warnings: Angst with a happy ending, eventual smut, jealousy, insecurity, polyamory negotiations.

Everything was turned off save for a single light in the hallway

Darcy tiptoed into her own apartment, trying her best to keep the noise down. She knew that with Steve’s abilities the chances of her not being heard were slim, but she wanted to try anyway. She slowly took off her shoes and jacket, laying them across the entry table instead of trying to open the hallway closet without noise. Then she flopped ungracefully onto the sofa, staring into the blank television screen. 

She’d stayed in the labs as long as she could get away with it today. Even as everyone else had left, she’d managed to stay hours past even Jane, sitting in her little office organizing notes that didn’t have to be finished anytime soon. She’d only reluctantly left once she’d started yawning more than once and realized she didn’t relish the idea of having to explain to anyone what she was doing sleeping in her office. 

Now she was here, in an apartment that she wasn’t sure she was welcome in anymore. At least it sounded like the snoring was coming from two separate bedrooms, so she supposed she could be grateful for small blessings. 

Darcy quietly sighed and ruffled her hair a bit, frustrated with herself. She was Darcy Fucking Lewis. She was a badass! Why was she letting herself get upset over something that hadn’t even happened yet? 

She decided her pity party was over for the night, so she headed to the shower to wash the lab away before climbing in her bed. Steve’s snoring quieted slightly as he rolled over and pulled her towards him in his sleep. Darcy finally let her mind quiet enough to revel in his familiar warmth as she drifted off. 

Darcy woke when the bed dipped next to her, and a hand began lightly playing with her hair. She groaned quietly and leaned into the touch, cracking her eyes open a little to see a chuckling Steve. 

“Morning, beautiful,” he said with a grin, leaning down to peck her forehead. He smelled nice, probably having just had a shower after his run. 

“Mmm, morning.” 

“You got in late. I was worried.”

Oh. That’s right. There were things happening. She was supposed to be upset.

She cleared her throat. “Yeah, just...lots of stuff to catch up on.” 

Steve studied her face, and his frown deepened. 

“Are you sure that’s all? Sweetheart, if something is the matter, you know you can talk to me.” 

Darcy snorted before she could stop herself and tried to cover it up with a yawn, but he didn’t buy it. 

“What does that mean?” 

“Doesn’t mean anything, Steve. I just woke up, and I haven’t had coffee yet. Obviously, I’m delirious. I’m gonna go shower.” 

Darcy pressed a quick kiss onto Steves still frowning lips before running straight to the bathroom, locking it for good measure. She hadn’t locked the door in ages, and she knows he probably heard it click and was freaking out about that now too. But at least hidden in her fortress of cleanliness, she could breathe. 

She rushed through her shower, wanting to hurry up and get ready so she’d be out the door faster. When she was done, she peered out into the bedroom, thankfully finding it empty, and dressed as quickly as she could. She skipped makeup entirely and threw her hair into a ponytail. Now all she had to do was chug down some coffee, and she could go back to hiding in the labs. 

“Smells good in here. Were you actually cooking?” She grinned at Steve as he was just rounding the hallway to meet with her. He laughed and laced his fingers with hers as he escorted her to the dining room. 

“No. That’s all Buck. He’s making flapjacks.” 

Oh, he certainly was. He was making “flapjacks” shirtless, his black sweats riding low on his sculpted hips. He merely nodded at her when they made eye contact. He scooped the last pancake onto a plate he was holding and handed it to Steve, wrapping his arm around his back like he was helping him balance. 

Darcy watched in silence as they set things on the table and took their seats. Or should she say Bucky took her seat, directly to Steve’s left, leaving her the seat that was right in front of them, like she was the third wheel. 

Did they really have to be so obvious? 

“Cool. Well, I’m just going to finish my coffee, and then I gotta head out. Science waits for no one.” 

Steve was practically pouting now, his beautiful eyes wide and pleading.

“Darce, just have a few, please? I haven’t seen much of you in days, and I miss you.” 

She sighed. “Fine. Since you brought out the puppy dog eyes, which is totally cheating by the way, I will stay for breakfast. I missed you too, babe.” 

She smirked when Barne’s fingers around his fork turned white as he glared at her from under his lashes. 

The breakfast was one of the most awkward things she’d been through, and she’s gone through a lot! It was a constant battle between Darcy and Bucky over who could get the most attention from Steve. Bucky had played very unfairly a few times, smirking darkly as he literally fed Steve right off his own fork and scooting close enough that their shoulders touched. Darcy was amazed how oblivious Steve was to the tension around him as he went from story to story, telling Bucky a funny one about Darcy, or telling Darcy one about Bucky. 

Then again, if he was trying this hard, maybe he wasn’t so much oblivious as desperate. But desperate for what? For them to get along? To try and make Darcy like Bucky so when Steve breaks up with her she’ll totally understand? Why was Steve not telling her anything? Why was he dragging this out? 

She fought off the tears that were threatening to take over, her throat so thick with emotion it was becoming hard to swallow. She needed to make her escape quick. 

Darcy threw her fork down on the plate and got up, aware of both pairs of eyes watching her as she placed it in the sink and chugged down the last of her coffee. 

“Alright, this was a blast and all, but I gotta get going. Jane’s probably well on her way to turning the tower into a crater by now.” 

She stopped next to Steve’s chair, leaning down to capture his lips and slide a hand into his hair. She kissed him deeply, sliding her tongue across the seam of his lips until he opened for her with a ragged moan. She nipped his bottom lip a couple times, feeling smug as she took in Steve’s dilated eyes and swollen lips. 

“I love you,” she whispered, rubbing his nose with hers for a second before leaning away. 

“I love you too. Have a good day,” he responded dreamily, beaming up at her as she stood up straight and adjusted her jacket. 

She didn’t even bother looking at Barnes on her way out, not wanting him to take that moment from her. 

“So, did you talk to him?”

Darcy would never admit that she had just jumped a little, but she’d been so lost in her own thoughts that she’d been unprepared. She’d been in the lab with Jane for four hours now, and besides that muttering of the scientist talking to herself, it had been silent the whole time, allowing her to mope by herself. 

“Sure. Course I did,” 

Jane looked up from her tablet, giving Darcy a look that she quickly interrupted as ‘You know what I mean.’

“Did you talk with him about your suspicions.”

“Oh, that. Nope. We just had a lovely breakfast that Barnes cooked shirtless, took my seat so I had to sit in front of them like I was in an interview, and was so close to Steve they were practically cuddling.” 

Jane observes Darcy thoughtfully for a moment. 

“You know, I have to say that this doesn’t sound like you. You usually meet things face on. I’d have expected you to sit them down for a chat already, find out what's going on and come up with a super detailed ten-year plan that you made into a powerpoint slideshow.” 

“I know. But Janie, I’m scared. All my life I’ve been good about treating everyone nicely but only letting a select few into the Darcy bubble. When you grow up in foster care, that’s something you learn to be good at. You learn to adapt easily, you never grow too attached, you stay ready for anything. I broke the rules already with you, but I’m not worried about you. I know you’ll stick around. But I let him in too much. He’s...fuck Janie...he’s so deep in the bubble it will probably burst if he wants to leave me.” 

Jane was stroking her arm comfortingly, but the quirked eyebrow was easy to read. 

“Don’t laugh at the Darcy bubble. It’s a good example,” Darcy huffed but leaned her head on Jane’s shoulder. 

“Not laughing. Sorry.” 

Darcy sighed and closed her eyes, soaking in the comfort from her friend. 

“I just...I love him. I let myself think of the future with him. I pictured a white dress and monogrammed towels. That’s the biggest no-no I learned growing up. Never make plans. But I did for him. Granted, I never planned on his best friend that is totally not just his best friend coming back from the fucking dead.” 

Jane plays with Darcy’s hair comfortingly. “That would be hard for anyone to plan for, to be fair. Sweetie, you can’t just keep avoiding him though. It’s going to keep making you miserable. You’re Darcy Lewis! You tased Thor! You can handle having a chat with your boyfriend.”

Darcy chuckled. “You’d think so, right? I know. I’ll do it. I just kinda hoped he’d come to me. With him just moving Bucky in and barely telling me anything, it’s like he’s purposely hiding it with no intention of me ever knowing. I think that might be what’s hurting the most. I thought he knew he could trust me. If he had come to me and been like, “Heya, Darce. So my best friend is alive and back in the 40′s best friend actually meant guy you went steady with in secret,” I’d have been more understanding. I would still have been jealous, but I’d be willing to figure out a solution for everyone. But the way it is now, it’s like I’m purposely being pushed out.” 

“I’m sure that’s not what’s going on, babe. Steve loves you, you know that. He’s probably just as confused as you are. Why don’t you take a lunch. Go back to your place and pull him into your room for a talk. It’s better to just get it done and over with like a band-aid. If worse comes to worse, you’re welcome to stay with Thor and me.” 

Darcy sighs and glances towards the door. Jane was right. She should just get this over with. It probably wasn’t even that big of a deal.��

“Yeah, I should. Okay. Yeah, I’ll do that. Thanks for letting me whine and moan like a bitch to you.” 

“Just paying back my debt. I’ve whined enough in your ears. Go get your man.” 

Darcy straightened her shoulders and took a deep breath to calm herself. 

She could totally do this. She’s dealt with shit loads of stuff in the past few years. Asking her boyfriend a few questions should be a walk in the park compared to London. 

She punched in the door code and swung it open, promptly freezing the moment her eyes landed on the couch that faced the door. 

Steve was in Barnes’ lap, sloppily making out, their moans loud and filled with desire. Barnes had his hands gripping onto Steve’s hips tightly, rocking their hips together desperately as Steve gripped onto the other’s hair. 

Darcy made a garbled sound that was something she’d never heard herself make before. A wrecked sob that was pulled straight from her chest. 

Steve’s head shot around at the noise, his eyes wide with shock and panic. 

“Baby. Darcy, I’m...please. I can explain,” Steve stumbled off of Barnes, stalked towards Darcy with his arms stretched towards her. 

She backed away, trying to reach the door. Darcy chanced a look at Barnes, amazed to find that he looked more guilty than victorious. 

But it didn’t matter. He’d won without her getting a chance to fight. 

Darcy turned to flee, tugging her hand away as Steve grabbed it. 

“Darcy, stop. Please! I love you, come back!” 

Darcy kept running.

[saintkeith]

okay what about some pining!klance and everyone (including each other) knows how they feel but they just don't know what to do

your birthday is tomorrow (or in a few hours) so I thought I would go ahead and write this one for you. I’ve never written anything klance so this was super fun to work with !! Happy Birthday !!!

Hunk knew Lance would never admit it, but the playboy was head over heels for Keith. At first Lance would make subtle comments like, “If Keith were here” and “I miss making fun of Keith” which he would also never admit to the fact that it was playful teasing. Hunk knew when his friend genuinely hated someone, and when he was just being playful.

“You fit that ‘boys will be boys’ stereotype.” He said through a mouthful of cookies he’d just baked.

Lance arched a pointed eyebrow. “What do you mean? Isn’t that phrase kinda toxic?”

“Well yeah, obviously. What I mean is like you’re mean to Keith even though you like him. Kinda what boys in elementary school do to girls they actually like.”

Pidge snickered in agreeance. “You do act like a grade schooler.”

Lance nearly choked on the milk he was drinking, while the other two paladins laughed at him mockingly before Lance jabbed a finger into Pidge’s chest. “Okay, well first off, I’m not a grade schooler, if anything you’re a grade schooler, being the youngest palad-”

“I’m smarter than you-”

“And secondly, Keith is NOT a girl so obviously-”

“You’re gay. I get it dude.” Hunk stated, a happy smile on his face.

Lance only stared at him wide eyed, mouth dropped before his jaw clicked shut. “Hunk, you know I am not gay-”

“Yeah, you’re probably bi if anything, but you literally haven’t gone a day without mentioning Keith since he left to join the blades. Don’t mean to call you out, but that’s his shirt isn’t it?” Hunk pointed at the My Chemical Romance shirt. Only one person here listens to that.

“I’ve always listened to MCR…”

“Since when?” Hunk raised a confident brow this time, and Pidge was quick to put Lance on the spot.

“Since Keith left.” With that, Lance stormed out the kitchen, while his two friends giggled quietly.

“Why is it always so cold in this castle?” Lance whined as he walked into the breakroom, seeing that Shiro was napping somewhat on the couch while Pidge and Matt were discussing something probably nerdy.

Shiro peeked one eye open at Lance, before closing his eyes and resting his head against the back of the couch. “I don’t know. Is Keith’s jacket not keeping you warm?”

Lance flushed, before he scowled at the older male. “Excuse you, this is my hoodie!”

Shiro didn’t bother to open his eyes and look at him, but his tone of voice was amused. “So you both bought the same red and white jacket? Cute.”

Matt perked up. “Damn Shiro, you have eyes everywhere huh?”

“I actually have eyes built in my arm-”

“Ahem!” Lance interrupted, both hands on his hips. “I’ll have you know that when your beloved Keith dropped out of the Garrison, they ended up giving me the stuff he never received before he left.”

Shiro openly glared at Lance, which made him flatter. “It’s fine Lance, we’re just teasing you. We all know you miss you beloved Keith. It’s fine.”

Pidge actually took a moment to stop whatever she was typing up to stare back and forth between the two paladins, before Lance finally let up with a defeated sigh. “I, uh… I gotta put on my facemask. It’s that time again.” With that he left again.

No one said anything else to Lance about him pining over Keith. They’d shoot each other knowing glances when Lance would walk in wearing something that obviously was not his (you usually wouldn’t catch him dead in a Metallica shirt and skinny jeans) or try not to giggle when he even slightly mentioned anything about Keith or the blades.

Lance was slightly aware of his behavior. When he was cold at night (whenever night was in space) he’d sneak into Keith’s room to steal a few pillows, a blanket one night, and eventually had his whole wardrobe in his closet. Any missions they’d engage, Lance felt a bit more at ease with Shiro being the leader again, but it was hard to accept when he was just starting to get used to Keith leading the team. It was also weird to form sword, since that was Keith’s job.

Some days he’d go to the hanger and fly the red lion, wondering how in the world Keith got used to such fast and quick responding controls. He found himself thinking more into a flight or fight instinct, and nine times out of ten, he’d end up fighting, just how he suspected Keith would.

“I miss my bond with the blue lion, but I also miss Keith too.”

“Finally!” Hunk exhaled. “You admitted it!”

Lance grunted as he watched the game they were playing end. He put it on pause to sit back and lean up against the bed.

“Yeah, I guess. I wish we were more important to him than the blades were.”

Hunk took a moment to study his friend, before saying anything. “Lance… I don’t think it has anything to do with who is more important. I think it’s that Keith found a place to belong with the blades, that he just didn’t find here with us. Shiro and… well the rest of us, hoisted a lot of stress on his shoulders making him the leader and all.”

“That’s true I suppose. I just wish we had done more to get rid of his insecurities. It bothers me that he thinks so low of himself.”

Lance sighed as Hunk rubbed his back. “I’m sure you’ll convince him otherwise when he gets back.”

“What? How?” Lance perked up at that, excited at the thought of Lance returning, even for a little bit.

“Dude… have you seen your own room?” He gestured to the room, that was covered with Keith’s clothes in piles, and extra blankets and pillows that obviously didn’t belong to him. Lance could only shove him playfully while they laughed.

“Shiro.”

The leader took a second to turn around, so engrossed in the map and where they were stationing rebel fighters that he almost missed hearing his name. When he turned, his eyes widen with surprise before his face lit up in a smile.

“Keith! You’re back!”

They both hugged for a moment before Shiro let him go, hands placed on his shoulders.

“Is everything alright?” He asked, his tone laced with worry as he looked Keith up and down.

“Yeah. The blades decided to send me back here for a couple of days so I can keep up with you guys. Kolivan said I need time to kinda regroup. The work we’ve been doing, its… well you know.” Keith smiled and looked down for a second. While he definitely was pleased working with the blades, their brutal ways of believing the mission was more important than any individual did grate on his emotions a bit. It’s not that he didn’t agree with them, but every mission was life threatening.

“I understand. Maybe you should go rest up a bit, the others are having some down time. We can all meet up at dinner later.”

“Uh, about that…” Keith shuffled a bit. “If the other guys really didn’t want me apart of the team, you could have told me so Shiro. I honestly would have been more than fine just leaving, since I was never really a good tea-”

“Keith. What are you talking?” Shiro crossed his arms, wondering what could have spurred this on.

“Well, my stuff. You guys got rid of all my stuff in my bedroom. I already checked.”

Shiro could only blink for a second before laughing out loud. Keith jumped in shock for a moment, staring dumbly at the older man he considered to be his brother. Shiro was better at expressing his thoughts and feelings on things than Keith was, but like Keith, he didn’t have these kinds of out burst (Keith had angry ones, other than that, he was reserved).

“Oh Keith…” He sighed. “It’s not like that. Go check Lances room.”

Keith felt a vein pop in his forehead. “I swear if this is another cruel prank from him I’ll-”

“Just. Go. Check.”

Out of all the clothes Keith owned, Lance had to admit that his Garrison hoodie and sweatpants were the most comfortable. When the door slid open, revealing a red faced paladin in his tight black marmora suit (which Lance found admittedly hot), Lance went through a whole range of emotions. He went from anger, to embarrassment, to extremely happy to flustered in like two seconds that he choked on his on spit when he tried to say “uh”.

“Why do you have your hair up in a bandan- Why are you wearing my clothes?!”

Lance took a moment to recollect himself. “It’s not like you needed them after you left!”

“So you just take people’s things when they leave for a little b-”

“Don’t say it’s been a little bit! You’ve been away for several weeks now! Besides I’m the red paladin now-”

“Yeah, yeah I get it! You never wanted me to be the head anyways!”

Keith grumbled as he started to pick up his clothes. “That’s not true…”

“Of course it is. Don’t lie.”

“I’m not lying! Sure it might have been hard accepting that Shiro was gone and we had to rearrange lions but I never wanted you to leave me or the rest of the team!” Keith snapped his head at Lance, and his gaze softened a bit at how serious the tanned boy looked. He knew Lance could be serious at times, but it was far in between. Normally his flirty attitude put the rest of the team at ease, so this meant he probably felt deeply about this.

Keith sighed as he stood straight up with an armful of his own clothes. “I didn’t mean to upset you or anyone else by leaving the team and joining the blades. I thought I was doing the right thing.”

Lance only frowned at that before coming closer to Keith and knocked the clothes back on the floor. “Leave your clothes here. There’s too much to carry back.”

“Okay where am I sleeping?”

“In here.”

“Excuse me?”

Lance pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “Are you deaf and dumb? You’re staying here. I can make a makeshift bed with all the extra pillows and covers. There’s no point in taking all your stuff to your room when you’ll most likely leave again.”

Keith only blinked before he grinned at Lance. “What? Because you’ll only go back to get my stuff?”

Lance turned beat red at that, but he wasn’t sure if it was because Keith was lowkey flirting with him or if it was because Keith had a beautiful smile.

“Just shut up! To answer your question early, the bandana is to pull my hair away from my face. I’m about to put on a face mask. Wanna join?”

“Sure.”

Lance barely hid his delight at the answer. “Okay then get out of that ugly suit,” he lied through his teeth, “and wearing something more comfortable.”

“Hmm, okay.” Keith took a moment to watch Lance head into the bathroom to mix his concoction before he started to unbuckle his armor. “Hey Lance! Can you help me for a second?!”

Lance almost dropped the glass bowl he was mixing in before he shakily set it down. ‘Okay Lance, chill. He’s got nothing that you haven’t seen before!’ Taking a deep breath he slowly stepped out the bathroom to see Keith in nothing but the body suit.

‘Damn he looks good in black!’

“I just need you to unzip the back for me.”

“Y-Yeah. Sure thing.”

Carefully, he brushed away Keith’s hair (his hair felt like silk) and slowly pulled down the zipper, the noise it was making seemed like the loudest thing in the room and rang in his ears.

“The hell?” He cleared his throat, keeping his blue eyes going from broad shoulders to the narrow waist and small of Keiths back. “How the hell do you not get your mullet caught in the zipper of this thing?”

Keith scoffed at that. “For that, I’m gonna wear something of yours.”

“Fine by me.” Lance blurted out before mentally screaming at himself. Quickly, he turned on his heel to finish mixing the face mask.

Keith only stared at him before sliding the suit off, and grabbing some shorts and a tank top. So Lance like. He walked into the bathroom, watching Keith had some rosewater and witch hazel to the muddy concoction in the bowl. Lance took a moment to glance at him.

“Aren’t you cold wearing that?”

“No? It’s not nearly as cold in this castle as you say it is.”

“Well… it doesn’t get cold in Cuba.” There was almost a sad look in his blue eyes, and Keith felt bad that he brought it up.

“Hey, I’m sorry-”

“It’s fine!” Lance chirped, trying to push away the thoughts of his family and home out of his head. “We need to pull your hair back from your face.”

Keith arched a thick eyebrow as he watched Lance go rummaging through a cabinet. “I look ugly without my mullet.”

“You’re ugly with it. Here.” Lance held up a hair band and a hair tie. “Turn around so I can brush your hair.”

Keith narrowed his eyes at him, before turning around. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

Lance slowly started from the bottom, brushing his hair and smoothing it out with his hands. He couldn’t tell what Keith’s expression was, but by the soft sighs, he seemed to be enjoying it. It looked like at one point Keith’s hair was just normally short and he didn’t bother to get a trim, so it turned into a mullet at the base of his neck.

‘Does he wash his hair with coconut oil or something?’ Lance wondered, but decided not to ask. He brushed his grown out side bangs, and pulled it back into a tight and small pony tail at the top of his head. Afterwards he stretched the hair band over his head.

“Turn around.”

Keith turned towards him, and Lance pulled the hair band up over his face and made it pull back the rest of the lose bangs the pony tail couldn’t hold back completely. Lance stared at his face for a second, never having seen his whole face like this before. Keith happened to have high cheekbones, and pretty square jaw, while his forehead evened out the rest of his face. Not too big, not too small, and while he had thick eyebrows, for someone who probably didn’t tweeze them, they had a perfect and natural arch to them.

“You are a horrible liar.” Lance said, not holding back this time, and was delighted to see Keith blush and look away.

“Is the face mask ready yet?”

“Yes. You’ve probably never detoxed your face before, so I’m putting yours on first.” Lance dipped the brush into the mix, before brushing it over Keith’s face.

“Oh my god! It’s cold!”

“I thought you didn’t get cold! Now stay still!”

They both bickered back and forth while Lance painted Keith’s face with the green mix, Keith watching through the mirror and making snarky comments about Lance’s lack of painting.

“Yeah well, we’ll see you do better.”

“I will!” Keith snatched the bowl after Lance finished and dipped the brush into paint Lance’s face next. With a shaky hand, he decided to start with Lance’s forehead, figuring it would be the easiest.

“Wow you already got it in my eye brows!”

Keith rolled his eyes. “It’s not like you have any to begin with. Compared to me anyways.”

“Excuse me? Are you blind too? I’ll have you know these eyebrows are the fullest you’ll ever see. They have never been touched by a razor.”

“Suuuure.” Keith laughed at him. “Stop scowling. You’re gonna mess me up.”

Lance sighed irritably and watched Keith paint on him through the mirror, but every now and then he would look at Keith and note how adorable he looked when concentrating. Keith would look back at him, and for the first time noticed the deep blues in Lances eyes. ‘He really was meant to be the blue paladin huh?’ Embarrassingly, they both would look away.

Once finished, Keith set the bowl in the sink and turned on the hot water so it’d melt off the bowl.

“So uh… how long will you be here for?”

“Several days.”

Keith looked at Lance, trying to figure out what was making him look so serious.

“Hey can I ask you something?” Keith broke the awkward silence, watching how Lance stiffened.

“Y-Yeah?”

“… Are you doing that thing elementary boys do to girls they happen to li-?”

Keith stopped as he watched Lance groan and bang the back of his head against the wall. “Not this again…”

The shorter male blinked for a moment, before feeling a knot well up in his throat. “What- Actually nevermind. That was a dumb question and that’s a stupid analogy.” Quickly, he went to leave the bathroom, but Lance quickly got his arm and gently pulled him back.

“Keith, it is like that. Kinda?”

“Kinda?”

Lance pulled down the collar of his- Keith’s hoodie and was actually thankful the mask was hiding his surely red cheeks. “Kinda, because that is a really stupid stereotype. I don’t want to be mean to you anymore, I never meant any harm in making fun of you, but… I don’t want to pick at you to a point where you feel you have to leave the team.”

Keith’s jaw dropped. “Lance, it’s not like that-”

“Yes it is like that! Even if you didn’t take it that way, it didn’t help you feel any better about belonging here. I’m almost positive Shiro hates me for it.” Lance hugged himself, shivering at the cold and rubbing his shoulders.

Wordlessly, Keith grabbed Lances hand and sat him down on the bed, crisscrossing his legs and sitting across from him. “Lance, listen… I can’t explain why I joined the blades. Part of it is because I wanted Shiro to reconnect with the black lion and the other part… I’ve had the knife on me for as long as I can remember and joining the blades… I feel I’m one step closer to finding out who I really am. It has nothing to do with you picking on me, okay? I’ll always be apart of Voltron, even if I am not physically here with all of you. Besides, I already know you like me.”

Lance perked up at that, eyebrows raising. “Really?”

“Yes. We would not make a good team if you absolutely hated me.”

‘Idiot, not that kind of like.’ Lance felt his world damper a bit, all hopes lost.

“I didn’t mean that kinda like. Like… I like like you.”

It was Keith’s turn to be surprised. “Really? I thought you were straight?”

Lance wrinkled his nose at that. “What gave you that impression?”

“For starters, every planet we’ve gone to you find some girl to hit on.”

“Hmm.” Lance scratched the back of his head. “Good point. I guess I’m bi then, but I’m like ninety nine percent sure you’re as straight as the stick up your ass.”

“Believe in the one percent. I’m gay as fuck.”

“What? Seriously?” Lance choked, almost wondering if Keith was messing with him.

“Yes, seriously! Why would I lie about that?”

“Wow, I like Galra Keith.”

“Man! Shut up!” Lance laughed at him wholeheartedly, and Keith could only Lance back, feeling it was music to his ears.

“Okay, well…” Lance began, quieting down a little. “Do you wanna kiss?”

Keith smirked at him. “Damn you move fast. You haven’t even taken me out on a date yet!”

Lance pouted, his bottom lip sticking out. “Are you rejecting me?”

“Well if we kiss, you’ll mess up our face masks.”

Lance feigned heartbreak, throwing his hand over his chest. “You are rejecting me! To think I’ve never been turned down before!”

“Oh? And Allura hasn’t rejected you a million times before?”

The former blue paladin scowled at that. “She’s probably asexual.”

“Or a lesbian. Better yet, just not interested in you.” Keith teased, watching how Lance was starting to throw a fit.

“Oh shut up! Why do you care if she’s not interested in me?”

Keith crawled closer to keith, placing his hands and Lances thighs and leaning into Lance, his face inches away from the other. “Because I’m interested in you.” Slowly, with closed eyes, he moved in to gently kiss Lance. It was nothing but them pressing their lips up against one another, but the action was intimate and Lance closed his blue orbs to hold the moment. After a moment of pressing up against one another, Keith pulled back before it could get to heated. He wasn’t ready for that, and he didn’t want to mess up their face masks.

Lance’s eyes fluttered open and they looked into each other’s eyes before Lance spoke softly. “Several days… that’s not enough time for us to figure out where we’re going with this.”

Keith sighed, head bowed. “I know, but at least I have one extra thing to come back to. In the meantime, you can keep my clothes.” He glanced at the clock, and got off the bed. It was around the time Coran would serve dinner.

“Of course…” Lance sighed, dewy eyed as he Keith held his hand and let him out the bedroom door.