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cruel-seduction · 18 days ago

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Harry Potter Headcanon ||18+

Harry James Potter as Your Boyfriend

(୨୧) That Stupid Cute Look - He’s the kind of guy who gets flustered over the tiniest things, like you saying “I love you” for the first time, and he’s all wide-eyed like “Wait, you do?” (His face when he’s trying to process his feelings is pure heart-melting adorableness). You could just say “Hi” and he’s already blushing.

(୨୧) Protective, but in the Dumbest Ways He might try to protect you, but it comes out in the dumbest ways possible. Like that time he stepped in front of you to block a hex, even though you could have dodged it just fine. (You: “I’m literally a witch too, Harry.” Him: “I know. But you’re my witch.”)

(୨୧) The Awkward PDA He’s not great at showing affection in public, but when he does, it’s either accidental or he’s so shy about it that it ends up looking like the cutest thing ever. Like grabbing your hand when he’s scared or pulling you in for a hug, then quickly letting go like “Was that okay?” “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable”

(୨୧) The Secret Softie Harry has a lot of inner turmoil, but with you, he’s the softest. He’ll pick you up a random book he knows you’ll love, just because he’s seen you reading about a topic once and now he wants to know you. He probably can’t even admit to himself how much he’d love to just curl up next to you and fall asleep. (That’s totally a boyfriend move, right?).

(୨୧) Harry's 'I'm Not Jealous' But Totally Is He’s the type to get all jealous when some dude tries talking to you, but he’s too nice and oblivious to show it properly. He’s probably lowkey eyeing the guy, but pretending to look at something else, hoping you won’t catch on to how possessive he’s being. (Meanwhile, he’s about to hex someone for looking at you too long). The poor guy thought that you would leave him for someone better. (Meanwhile him being the best)

(୨୧) The Bedroom Eyes Don’t let his dorkiness fool you; when he really gets in the mood, his eyes change—like a stormy night, all intense and full of intent. He’s the kind of guy who whispers your name before he kisses you, just right before he pulls you closer, one hand in your hair. (Okay, but imagine him lowkey whispering some dirty shit in your ear, like “I want you splayed out on the table like my own personal feast.”)

(୨୧) The Protective Lover Let’s be real: Harry’s dangerous when he’s protective. Like, you’re in trouble? You better believe he’s about to go full rage-mode on anyone who dares harm you. And if he’s feeling super spicy? (Well, let’s just say you’d love to be pinned against a wall by those saviour arms.)

(୨୧) The Sensitive Boyfriend - He’ll listen to your problems like you’re the most important person in the world. You’re ranting about some dumb thing at work, and he’s just sitting there, nodding along, fully invested, even though half the time he doesn’t fully understand what you’re saying. He’s a good listener—and a better lover when it’s time to just show you he’s there for you. (When you feel like absolute shit, he’ll show up with snacks, a blanket, and the softest way of reminding you how much he loves you).

(୨୧) The Choking - Okay, I’m not saying he’s into choking, but like, he’s the type to tease you just a little bit. He’d never go overboard, but during that heated moment where you’re both struggling for control, he’d totally be that guy to grip your throat just enough to have you gasping, all while looking at you with that smirk like “You like that, don’t you?” (Honestly, he could probably make you lose your mind with that sort of thing).

(୨୧) The "I'm Not That Into You" Lie - If Harry ever said something like “I’m not that into you,” you’d be laughing and pulling him closer, because you know he’s lying. This man is obsessed with you, he just doesn’t know how to say it without feeling too exposed. (But the way he holds you in bed? No words needed, babe.)

(୨୧) The Honest Kisses - Every kiss feels like he’s giving you his soul. It's slow, tender, like he wants to savor the moment. But the second you start tugging at him, Harry’s turning up the heat—he’s kissing you harder, hands roaming because now that he’s sure you're his, he’s all in.

(୨୧) Clumsy in the Best Way - He’s constantly tripping over his own feet, knocking over glasses, and totally embarrassing himself, but in the best, most adorable way. (You’d just laugh and let him pull you in for a messy kiss, the two of you tangled up, both trying to get the other’s shirt off). So. Cute.

(୨୧) The Sweetness You Don’t Expect - For all his bravado, Harry’s the guy who remembers the little things. Like your favorite candy, the song you hum when you're happy, or that time you mentioned how you love the smell of the rain. And one day, poof, he shows up with it, looking shy but satisfied because he’s made you smile. (All the little things just make you want him even more).

(୨୧) Emotionally constipated but trying. Harry’s feelings hit him like a freight train, and he’s not great at expressing them. He’ll stare at you for an embarrassingly long time before blurting, “You’re...really important to me,” in that awkward, raspy voice. And you’re just like, “Harry, are you malfunctioning again?”

(୨୧) Domestic Harry is a gift from Merlin himself. This boy? In a t-shirt that’s a little too tight across the chest and low-hanging sweatpants while making tea in the morning? Yeah, it’s a religious experience. (Feel free to pray to Harry’s holy forearms; they deserve worship.)

(୨୧) Hot, awkward sex god vibes. Harry doesn’t know how sexy he is, which somehow makes him hotter. His hands? Big and calloused from Quidditch, and the way they grab your hips? Game over. And don’t get me started on his voice—low and raspy when he says, “Come here.” Like, YES, SIR, TAKE ME NOW.

(୨୧) Sweet but dumb declarations of love. “I think I’ve loved you since you laughed at me for falling off my broom that one time.” Like, WHAT?? (You’ll laugh, but it’s also the cutest thing ever because Harry’s love language is sincerity, and it hurts.)

(୨୧) The way he looks at you? WHEW. Those green eyes aren’t just legendary for killing Voldemort; they’re also designed to melt your soul. He’ll glance at you mid-laugh, and you’re left thinking, “Oh, so this is why people write ballads about love.”

(୨୧) That hair. Listen, Harry’s hair is a mess, but the sexy kind of mess. You’d spend hours just tugging on it (and yes, he loves that). Plus, post-Quidditch Harry with sweat-slicked hair and flushed cheeks? Yeah, good luck staying upright.

(୨୧) Harry James Potter is your personal furnace. He runs hot—like, physically. Which means winter nights = you wrapped in his arms, snug as hell. And yes, he’ll mumble sleepy, incoherent things about how perfect you are.

(୨୧) He’s a dork, and we love that man. Tripping over his own feet when you kiss him? Yes. Making bad puns in stressful situations? Also yes. Saying, “I’m not scared,” before screaming when a bug jumps? Oh, Harry. We’ll protect that boy forever.

(୨୧) Your forever hero. At the end of the day, Harry isn’t just The Chosen One—he’s your chosen one. He might be awkward, overprotective, and emotionally clueless, but he’ll love you with everything he has. And that’s more than enough.

Now the next part is gonna be spicy. (Not too much since I am feeling more romantic than horny)

(୨୧)The Unexpected Confidence - Harry might seem shy and unsure at first, but the second things start to heat up, something shifts. It’s like all that bottled-up Gryffindor bravery comes out, and suddenly, his kisses are rougher, his grip stronger, and he’s growling your name like he’s been dying to claim you.

(୨୧) The Messy, Hungry Kisser - He kisses like he’s starving, messy and desperate, pulling you closer like he can’t stand even an inch of space between you. His hands? Oh, they’re everywhere—gripping your waist, sliding under your shirt, tangling in your hair like he needs to touch all of you at once.

(୨୧) Soft dom Energy - Harry isn’t the full-blown "do as I say" type, but he has this soft dominance that makes you melt. Like when he grabs your chin and tilts your head back to kiss you deeply, or when he murmurs, “Good girl, just like that,” while you’re doing something that’s very not innocent.

(୨୧) Possessive in the Hottest Way - He might not realize it, but Harry’s possessiveness shows when things get intense. He loves leaving marks—bites on your collarbone, bruises on your hips—and the way his name spills out of your mouth? That’s his favorite sound. He’ll whisper, “Say it louder.”

(୨୧) Clothes-Ripping Chaos - He’s not patient when he’s turned on. Buttons go flying, your shirt’s halfway ripped off, and he’s mumbling apologies between kisses because “I just can’t wait anymore.” (Honestly, you’re not complaining because watching him lose control is a whole mood.)

(୨୧) The Way He Uses His Mouth - Let’s talk about Harry going down. He’s the type to spend hours down there, holding your thighs open with a firm grip, moaning like he loves every second of it. He looks so good between your legs, messy hair and flushed cheeks, and he’ll glance up at you with that boyish grin before diving back in like a man on a mission.

(୨୧) The Dirty Talk Surprise - You’d never expect it, but Harry’s got a filthy mouth when he’s turned on. He’ll whisper things like, “You’re so beautiful like this,” or “You’re going to be a good girl for me, right?” And if you beg? Oh, he’s hooked. Hearing you plead for him is the ultimate turn-on.

(୨୧) The Strength You Forget He Has - Harry might not look it, but Quidditch has given him some serious strength. He can pin you to the wall, lift you up like it’s nothing, or press you down into the mattress with a grip that makes you feel completely at his mercy. And that little smirk he gives when he realizes you like it? Deadly.

(୨୧) The Slow Tease - Sometimes he likes to take his time, dragging his hands and mouth over every inch of your body, just to hear you whimper. He’ll kiss your neck, your chest, your stomach, going achingly slow until you’re practically begging him to move faster. (Spoiler: He loves hearing you beg.)

(୨୧) Post-Mission Sex Is Next-Level - After a particularly dangerous mission or a near-death experience, Harry is feral. He’s got this mix of adrenaline and relief that turns into desperate, passionate sex where he’s almost growling your name. He’ll push you against the wall, his hands rough but his kisses soft, and the way he moans, “I thought I’d lost you,” will wreck you.

(୨୧) Whispered Promises in the Heat of It - Harry loves whispering in your ear while he’s deep inside you. Things like, “You’re perfect,” or “You don’t know what you do to me,” as he grips your hips tightly and thrusts just a little harder. It’s not just sex for him—it’s pure devotion, and you feel every ounce of it in the way he moves.

(୨୧) The Aftercare King - After everything’s said and done, Harry turns back into that sweet, caring boyfriend. He’ll clean you up, press soft kisses to your forehead, and wrap you in his arms, murmuring how much he loves you. He’s the type to pull you close, trace circles on your back, and stay up just to make sure you’re okay. (It’s the perfect mix of hot and wholesome.)

(୨୧) That Smirk When He Knows You’re Watching - If you’re watching him undress—or if he catches you biting your lip while he’s shirtless—he’ll flash that cocky smirk and drag it out.

(୨୧) Choking, But Make It Hot Harry’s hesitant at first, but the second you ask him to choke you, something snaps. His hand fits perfectly around your throat, squeezing just enough to make your breath hitch, and he leans down to murmur, “You look so pretty like this.” (Goodbye. Dead.)

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This was requested by @aceattorneyforlife. Thanks for requesting. I hope I matched your expectations and that you are happy with it.

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#harry potter fluff #harry james potter x reader #harry potter x reader #harry potter #harry potter x you #harry james potter x you #harry potter fanfiction #headcanon #harry potter headcanon #golden trio era

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zhongrin · 1 year ago

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𒆙 morax

part 6/8 of ⎡∞ / 𝟔 𝟎 𝟎 𝟎 ⁺⎦, a zhongli 2023 birthday event

𖧷 tags ┈ minors dni, gn!reader, afab!reader, biting/marking, cockwarming, choking but not really, edging, dirty talk, cervix fucking but not really ‘fucking’-, i don’t know how to tag things help

𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝒻𝓊𝓁𝓁 𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓊 ❬ masterlist ❭ 𐫱 𝓂𝑒𝓂𝒷𝑒𝓇𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓅 ❬ taglist ❭

“𝓁ord morax! must you keep branding me with these marks?!”

morax blinked owlishly as you barged into his little office. he would have immediately beheaded others who would dare act so boorish, but your presence - nevermind the fact you were glaring at him - would always be welcomed into even the most private corners of his life, so he merely leaned back on his golden throne, abandoning the papers waiting for his approval as he gazed at you like you were the whole universe. his cor lapis-lined tail coiling behind the chair thumped lightly on the ground as he spotted the tokens he had so graciously placed on your skin.

“…. yes?”

the honest answer seemed to have made you double back. you could tell from his clueless expression that he bore no remorse for his actions.

“i must beseech you to restrain yourself. the adepti dare not even raise their heads when i talk to them!“

“but… unlike minerals and other inorganic materials, your skin heals, so naturally i must renew the imprints every now and then. i cannot fathom what made you so displeased? i have taken precautions so the process would be enjoyable to you at the very least… or are you saying that the act was not pleasurable for you after all?”

you had to resist the urge to facepalm, but you couldn’t help the natural reaction of your cheeks starting to sizzle with warmth. morax’s gentle smile lilted into a slightly cheeky grin, and he beckoned you to come over. you both praised and berated yourself inwardly when you obeyed his command like a faithful pup, knowing to seat yourself on his lap.

“are you not proud to bear the proof that you are mine, my dear? if it truly upsets you, i… will try my best to reign in my instincts. but you know how i always seem to lose myself in the heat of the moment…,” his kisses journeyed from your temple down your neck and shoulder, a silent plea for leniency.

it would have been a sweet and innocent gesture if his hands hadn’t wandered above your silken robes.

“my lord….”

“mmm… i’m sorry, darling, it’s the dragon instincts,” he nuzzled lovingly onto the junction of your neck, and you quickly felt both the heat and his arousal rise. quite literally, that was. “your smell mixed with mine is just too tantalizing to ignore. to illustrate, would you be able to pass by a banquet full of your favored delicacies without salivating?”

“perhaps not, but i would be able to refrain from devouring the whole banquet like some greedy buffoon,” you faked a reprimanding tone, eyebrows raised.

“which proves that you are, in some ways, stronger than me,” his arms tightened around you, geo-lined appendages sneakily slipping beneath your garment to rub your inner thighs, before trailing over your dampened underwear, “though it seems to me that you’re putting up a front…”

you were torn between rolling your eyes or blushing in embarrassment, “perish the salacious thoughts. i came straight from the bedchambers, my lord.”

“ah, so these are both your arousal and the remnants of our passionate love last night? how delightful. no wonder you smell like the most fragrant and mouthwatering delicacy in the whole teyvat,” he pressed his lips on one of the hickeys, staring in contemplation at your body nestled on his lap, an idea brewing like the freshest tea in his mind, “say, darling… i know you’re tired, but won’t you at least let this lovestruck lizard steal a morsel from the figurative banquet? just a little arrangement to tide me over until the moon graces our nation.”

“….. i will consider your proposal; enlighten me.”

you really, really should have thought twice about making contracts with a dragon.

seated snugly on top of your beloved’s lap after he had - far too easily, much to his delight and your fervent embarrassment - eased you onto his cocks, his non-dominant hand poised to lightly rub your abdomen, right on the bulge indicating the way he was all nestled inside your tight heat. his other hand had long since left your hip and was in the process of writing some kind paperwork to ensure the construction of what shall be a prosperous harbor sometime in the far future would be going smoothly — or something along that line. he might have sort of meandered about it as he worked, but alas, you were too distracted to actually listen to his words, clenching and squirming like a bunny in heat instead.

morax hummed. momentarily, he set his pen down against the polished sandbearer wood of his desk. his slender fingers reached up to lightly brush and wrap around your throat. your breath hitched, heart soaring like a hummingbird, cunt trembling. he wasn’t even putting any pressure ー just a light touch. a warning. and yet the message was there; even more pronounced with the verbal warning whispered right beside your ear.

"mind your manners, darling."

you nodded with a whimper, gulping and feeling his fingers lightly caressing your pulse point before they detached themselves from your heated skin to curl elegantly around the pen once more. the deity resumed talking as if whatever happened was a delusional wet dream you conjured out of desperation this fine afternoon, but this time, you ceased squirming. he gave you a soft kiss on your nape as a reward. pride permeated your veins, your eyelashes fluttering and fists clenching in an attempt to control yourself.

"not to fret, your patience will be rewarded," he purred, deep and velvety and smooth, his breath tickling your skin, burning your nerves and sending your arousal lurching. perhaps you should have begged for him to relent to his depraved desires and devour the whole banquet instead.

the hand on your tummy trailed upwards to settle on your chest, palming idly before rolling a painfully hard nipple between the calloused pads of his fingers, the gentle movement a complement to the cold sensation of his rings pressing onto soft, sensitive flesh. sparks bloomed like fireworks and slick trickled down your stuffed pussy. yet still, you obeyed with trembling thighs; the only body part moving being your walls, squeezing around his cock, wishing for it to move and bully your sweetest spots with hard and precise series ofー

"so well behaved for me...."

you swore you heard him chuckle.

"my good mate."

he graciously bestowed you a new mark on your neck and a teasing little thrust, just enough for the two heads to peck your cervix like a teasing lover, savoring the enchanting wail falling from your lips.

“oh, this archon can’t wait to utterly ruin you tonight.”

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin smut #zhongli #zhongli x reader #∞ / 𝟔 𝟎 𝟎 𝟎 ⁺#rin writes #minors dni

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jakesduskwood · 7 months ago

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even statues crumble if they're made to wait

Pairing: Jake x Fem!MC

Genre: Post-Episode 10 Duskwood, Post-Episode 1 Moonvale

Words: 8,916

Summary: It's been three months since the explosion in the mine. Three months since Hannah was found. And MC's accepted that Jake is never coming back. When she gets roped into another missing person's case, it makes for the perfect distraction. Jake is dead. It's fine. That is, until she finds herself on the phone with Alan Bloomgate who says he has something to show her. But it's fine. Jake is dead.

Until he's not.

EPISODE-1 MOONVALE SPOILERS AHEAD (MAYBE)!

[ A/N: Hello! :)

I know it's been a while since I've done this, but I finished Moonvale Episode 1 and if you've seen the ending (and used its Duskwood code), you know what happened and how excited I was to receive that bit of Duskwood. So, I took it and ran with it, and out came this extremely long fic. I did not proofread this as it took me literally almost 12 hours to write so it is completely and 100% me and my love for Jake and I hope you love it.

Side note: I suck with anything related to timelines, so I made one up on my own. I know Episode 1 of Moonvale takes place over the course of a day or two, but for the purpose of this fic, it made sense to make it longer, so it's not a typo, or me losing my mind, it's just the way my brain processed this.

Enjoy! :) ]

It’s been three months since the explosion in the mine.

Three months since Richy had been killed. Three months since Hannah was rescued. Three months since I had last spoken to Thomas or Cleo or Lilly or…or Jessy. I didn’t blame her then and I don’t blame her now. Any of them, really. I didn’t share the bond they had with each other. I wasn’t from Duskwood. It didn’t matter that we’d experienced a tragedy together—and yes, perhaps them more than me, but I loved Richy too. I had lost Richy too. And Jake—

But mostly, I think they just wanted to forget. To move on. They didn’t want to remember that their friend had been capable of…of that. And I was a constant reminder of that to them. So I understood why we didn’t necessarily talk anymore.

The one person I did keep in contact with from Duskwood, oddly enough, other than the occasional update from Alan Bloomgate, was Dan. We weren’t best friends or anything, but he allowed me to check in on our friends in a way that I didn’t know how to do with anyone else. Maybe because I thought he was the least affected among them. I knew he cared about Hannah, but he wasn’t to her what Thomas or Cleo or Lilly were. And he wasn’t to Richy what Jessy had been.

I’d learned from him that Thomas and Hannah had broken up. There was no bad blood, but Thomas hadn’t quite figured out how to accept the things he’d learned about his girlfriend when she’d been gone, and Hannah hadn’t quite figured out how to re-trust someone after Richy. Even if that person was Thomas. But I’d hoped they would find their way back to each other in the end.

I thought about reaching out to Jessy every once in a while—even just as an apology for everything that had happened. I’m sorry that Hannah was found at the expense of Richy. I’m sorry that he did this to you. I’m sorry I didn’t realize it sooner. We should have. We should have. We should have. I miss you. But I never send it. I’m not all that sure she’d respond anyway.

Cleo and I were never all that close. She has her best friend back, so I think she’s probably as okay as she can be. Helping Hannah find a new kind of normal in a time where her childhood friend had kidnapped her in order to prove a point. I don’t know how you come back from that—I don’t know how you come back from knowing that you killed somebody at all.

I hadn’t found the courage to ask if somebody had told Hannah about Jake.

Not that I think it would matter anyway. I hadn’t heard from him since before the explosion in the mine, which was, like I said—three months ago. I waited the appropriate amount of time—twenty-five days—before I broke down and concluded that maybe he hadn’t survived. Which just piled a shit-ton of guilt onto my shoulders because it was supposed to be me in that mine. He had gone in place of me and now he was dead.

It was the only explanation that made sense. I was used to Jake disappearing for days at a time, but never as long as he had been now. And he didn’t seem like the type to tell me he loved me and then leave without a single explanation. Not unless he had to. But it had been three months and as much as I missed him, as much as my chest ached with the thought that we would never eat Chinese food out of shitty motels and have that on-the-run ending we talked about, I had accepted that he wasn’t coming back.

I wonder if he had known about Richy or if he had died still thinking Michael Hanson was the one who had kidnapped Hannah. I wonder if his last thoughts were of me. Maybe it’s selfish, but I kind of hope they were, because I’m pretty sure I’ll think about him for the rest of my life.

I wonder what it would have felt like to run my hands through his hair. To kiss him. To spend every waking moment with him and know it was because I loved him. Because I would have. Talking to Jake became about more than just finding Hannah. It became a part of my day I looked forward to more than anything else. He confided in me in a way that told me he never had with anyone, maybe not even Hannah, and I needed that from somebody. I needed somebody to trust in me the way that Jake did. I needed somebody to love me the way that Jake did.

It was strange—and maybe a little ironic—the thought that something so beautiful could come out of something so tragic.

Anyway, my point is: it’s been a long couple of months. Of thinking about my friends. Of thinking about Jake. Of wondering if I should have done things differently. I should have gone to Duskwood to help. Not even with the mine, but sooner. I could have. I could’ve gone when Jessy was attacked on the way home. I could’ve gone when the group made plans to cut out of town and hide away in the house Richy had found. Selfishly, I should have. In that moment, when they were settled around the fire and Lilly called me, I had never remembered wanting anything more. I should have grabbed Jake—metaphorically, maybe even literally—and rode it out with them to the end.

I don’t stop missing them after three months. Of wishing things could have been different. Wishing I could have done more. But exactly ninety-five days after the explosion in the mine, seventy days since I had accepted that Jake was never coming back, twenty-two days since I had last heard from anybody from Duskwood (Dan included), my phone dings with a new message.

And the cycle starts all over again.

It’s somebody named Eric, who claims he needs my help to find his friend Adam, who disappeared while he was waiting for a ride in someplace called Redlog Pines. And much like with Duskwood, I have never heard of Redlog, and the case reminds me way too much of Thomas’ first message to me, so much that it makes my chest ache, but I can’t say no because there’s somebody missing, and if I’d say no the first time, God knows where Hannah would be.

So, I say yes, and I help out where I can, and Eric decides he needs to bring about four more friends in on his little plan and I try my best to stay emotionally unattached because I remember everything that happened the last time and I can’t go through that again. I offer up information when I can and keep my words short and careful because I’m not ready to get attached to somebody else I know I might never meet.

I know how this ends.

Two days in, Ash, one of Eric’s friends, brings up my Duskwood past and the unhealed wound I’ve been trying to mend breaks open again. She asks about Richy, and about the mine, and then because I’m me and I can’t help myself, I tell her about Jake. She tells me the news never mentioned another body and I shove that thought to the back of my head because hoping for something that will never come true will kill me.

Four days into Adam’s disappearance, and the police not giving a shit—as Charlie, somebody who reminds me far too much of Richy for comfort, points out—my phone beeps with an incoming call from somebody I haven’t spoken to in a while.

“Go for [MC].” I answer my phone.

Ever since Hannah had been found in the mine and Jake had…you know, my phone had been more silent than I’d gotten used to. Until this new case. But even that—it was only a few days old and I didn’t want to go down the same path with them that I did with my friends in Duskwood. We didn’t really know each other that long, sure—even though sometimes it’d felt like it—but it felt like I’d finally been a part of something. Like, I had found these people who had chosen me for me.

And originally, maybe they had. Maybe they’d had every intention of keeping me around, but then Richy was the Man Without A Face and Alan Bloomgate had rescued Hannah and nothing was the same as it had been when we’d met each other. We knew too many secrets about each other by the time the town settled. Secrets we would have to take to the grave.

Or maybe I’m losing my mind a bit and I had really only been a means to an end.

Either way.

“Alan?” I raise my voice when there’s nothing but breathing on the other end of the line. “Did you mean to call me?”

His tone is clipped. “I found something.”

“You found something.” I repeat.

My heart clenches. For all I know, it might fall into my stomach. As far I know, from watching the news, from what Ash told me, Jake’s body was never found. Richy’s was. Or what was left of him to find, anyway. I had assumed that there just hadn’t been enough of Jake left. The thought left me nauseous, but it was better than hoping for something I knew I could never have.

“I’m sending it to your phone now.” He responds. “Let me know what you think of this.”

And then he hangs up.

That was a riveting conversation, I think as my phone dings with a message. I do my best to ignore my other messages—contacts from Duskwood I’m still not ready to acknowledge—and click Alan Bloomgate. He sent me a video that looks like—oh God.

Immediately, I’m overcome with emotion as an all-too-familiar forest pops up on my phone. It’s a video of Alan’s bodycam footage. He’s searching the Duskwood forest. A forest I’ve seen too many times in the background of other video calls.

I watch as he stumbles upon an object that’s too dark to make out at first. When he gets closer, it’s clear that it’s a backpack. It’s simple. Black. Nothing about it that screams this is mine and I left it here about anybody in particular. You stupid, stupid idiot, I tell my heart when it rattles against my chest in hope. He’s dead.

Alan stands and treks away from the backpack—I want to scream at him to go back, to open it and look through it and tell me if it’s what my heart aches to believe, but I can’t, because this is a video and I’m simply watching with wide eyes, waiting for…for something. But then. But then, he moves further into the forest and I watch as he stumbles upon an object that makes my knees tremble and tears rush to my eyes and my hands shake. A black hoodie. It looks like it’s been through hell, with holes scattered up the sleeves and dirt cakes into the hood, but it’s unmistakably his.

And then—Alan lifts the hood and picks up something that makes me sink to my knees with a sob that wracks my entire frame. Because I’m staring at Jake’s mask. The mask he doesn’t go anywhere without. The mask that protects him. And so my relief is short-lived, because I realize that even if he’s alive—which seems like a very big possibility at this point—he’s alive without the things that he needs to survive.

And then the anger kicks in. Because if he’s been alive, on his own, for three months—why has he not contacted me? Unless he survived the mine but he didn’t survive the after. But that didn’t make any sense. So, okay, he wasn’t dead. But that didn’t make any sense either. He told me he wouldn’t let them catch him. Because catching that meant he would be apart from me. Did something happen that prevented him from being able to reach out and tell me he was at least okay? A quick text that said didn’t die in the explosion in the mine, you don’t need to mourn me, by the way, going off radar for another year. Did he think I would have given up on him?

I wipe my eyes and shoot a message to Alan.

ME: Recently?? Did nobody search the forests before?

ALAN: Searched the forests for what, [MC]? The logical assumption seemed to be that if anybody was inside the mine when Richy set the fire, they would have perished alongside him. Officers were stationed outside every known entrance and exit. Besides, after the story you and your friends spun around this town, do you think anybody would have gone back into its forests?

ME: But it’s possible?

ALAN: I would say these items had been there for some time. But I would say it is likely he ditched them when he fled the mine, yes.

Another sob tears through my throat. Jake is alive. I don’t know quite what that means for us as of now, but I know it’s the best news I’ve heard since Hannah was found. Jake is alive. He’s out there somewhere. And even if it’s been three months, and even if I’m a little bit mad at him right now, I know that if he was here, I would throw my arms around his neck and hold on to him until someone dragged me off, and even then—I would fight kicking and screaming.

I close out of my messages with Alan and pull up a conversation I haven’t had the heart to look at in quite some time.

ME: Jake’s alive.

LILLY: …

LILLY: Have you spoken to him?

ME: Alan called. He found some of Jake’s things in Duskwood. I don’t know a lot of details. But I know he made it out of the mine.

Lilly types for a long while, but she doesn’t respond. I don’t take it personally. I think it’s probably hard for her to be happy that her brother’s okay while also trying to accept that her sister may never be okay again. Her sister, who had once-upon-a-time been kind-of-sort-of in love with their brother she didn’t know she had. I think that would probably mess with any family’s heads. And on top of all that, you throw in manslaughter and a kidnapping. I wouldn’t wish anybody, not even my worst enemy, to have had to go through what the Donforts had.

When it becomes adamant that Lilly isn’t going to respond, I start scrolling through messages with the rest of the group in Duskwood. I click on Jessy. I’m here if you need me. That had been the last thing I sent to her, a couple of days after Richy’s death. She hadn’t responded. I click out of Jessy’s contact and click on Thomas’ instead. Thank you for everything. That had been his last message to me after we found Hannah. I’d liked it. I hadn’t expected at the time it would be the last thing we’d ever say to each other. I click out of Thomas’ and click on Richy. So, you want to turn yourself in? I’d asked. That was before he called me. Before he lit a match and burned himself and the mine to the ground. Some people would call that heroic. I mostly call him a coward.

I click on Jake’s name. It’s been a while since I read messages between the two of us. Maybe before I had accepted—thought—he was dead. In that twenty-five-day period when I’d hoped with all I’d had that he would come back. I love you. That was the last message he sent me. I’d responded with I love you too, Jake. Then, four days later: Are you okay? A week later: Jake, please, you’re starting to scare me. I know you said you would contact when you could, but it’s been a week. After twenty-five days, when I had finally accepted our fate, I’d sent one final message: I hope you know that I love you, and I will always care about you, but I think it’s time for me to move on. I’m so sorry that I sent you into the mine. It should have been me. And I will probably feel the guilt from that for the rest of my life. Thank you for everything. Take care of yourself, wherever you are.

After that, I had closed out of our messages and hadn’t looked back. Partly because I couldn’t bear the pain of it. It felt like I had given up on him. I hadn’t—if I had thought for a second that he was alive, if I knew then what I know now, I would have never sent that message. But holding out hope for somebody who I thought was a ghost at the time? That was slowly killing me.

It’s only then that I notice the screen flickering. Much like the way it used to whenever Jake would hack into my phone. I don’t think he’s much in the mood to be hacking right now, but somehow, I know it’s him. When had he done this? Recently? If I had opened our messages, would I have seen this ten—twenty—even fifty days ago? It hadn’t looked like this the last time I texted him. Did he see my last message about needing to move on? Was that why he hadn’t reached out to tell me that he was okay? Because he thought I was moving on happily without him?

No, my brain supplies. He wouldn’t. He would reach out anyway, because he knows how much the thought of him not being okay would have destroyed you.

The screen flickers once more and then a message pops up, bright and blue-tinted and clear as day on my phone.

[MC]

I WILL FIND YOU

And the world around me shifts.

--------------------------------------------------

Maybe it sounds crazy, considering I’ve never seen his face before, but I always thought that if I’d ran into Jake one day, maybe on the street or at one of those motels he stayed at or maybe even in Duskwood, surrounded by all our friends, I would know it was him. I would, because it’s him, and it’s me, and we’re the only two people who understand each other quite the way we do.

I still believe that.

I believe it when I book my flight to Duskwood (or rather, twenty miles outside of town, which is the closest airport). I believe it when I board the airplane and find a seat next to a mother with her screaming child and when I shoot off a quick text to Eric to let him know I’ll be MIA for the next few hours, but to message me if he needs anything—and I think about how much easier this case would probably be to solve if we had Jake.

Maybe it would have been harder to find Hannah without me, but I know damn well they would’ve never found her without Jake.

Dan picks me up from the airport. I haven’t told the others yet. Something about it felt off—like I shouldn’t message them and say hey, I know we haven’t spoken in a while, but I’m booking a flight to look into why my maybe-slash-not-really boyfriend left his belongings in a forest we really wish we could forget about, and by the way, can I crash at your place?

It’s quiet on the car ride back into town. I’m looking through my messages from Eric and the group from Redlog Pines and thinking about how I’m Duskwood with this group and I want so badly to laugh because it’s ironic, but Dan wouldn’t understand. He might just call me crazy. Better yet, he would ask how I manage to get myself into these situations, and really, I don’t have an answer for him.

“How have you been?” I ask, just to break the tension, as Charlie, in my messages, tries to persuade his friends to head back into that creepy cave in the middle of the forest. He’s going to get someone killed, I think.

Dan looks over at me. “Are you still with Hackerman?”

My chest squeezes. “His name is Jake, Dan. And we were never really together.”

“Hm.” He nods like he doesn’t quite believe me. “You already know mostly everything that’s been happening here. Thomas and Hannah called it quits. They say it was some mutual decision, but it’s hard to find them in the same room together. Jessy hasn’t been out with us since. I think we remind her too much of Richy. The group’s all changed.”

“And you?” I ask.

He gives me a cheshire-like grin that doesn’t quite meet his eyes. “I’m always the same.”

We make it to Duskwood just as the sun’s going down. Much too late for me to try and trek through the forest and retrace the steps Jake might have taken that night. Not that I think it would help give me any clues as to where he might have gone, but mostly because I wonder if it will make me feel closer to him. We’ve never been in the same place before, and even if he’s not there now—he once was.

“Can you drop me at the police station?”

Dan blinks. “The police station.”

I nod. “Yeah.”

“We answered their questions for weeks, [MC]. I don’t think anything you have to tell them at this point is going to help. The investigation’s closed. Everybody knows Richy did it. He died with the fire in the mine. Everybody’s trying to move on from that.” He works his jaw. “Did you come here to open old wounds after all this time?”

I try not to show the hurt look on my face. “This isn’t about Richy. Look, Alan called me. He asked if I could look at some things. I figured it was better for me to do it in person. That’s it. Nothing to do with Richy. Nothing to do with Jessy. Nothing to do with you.”

He sighs, and I’m not entirely sure he’s going to abide by my wishes until we pull in front of a tiny building—tinier than most—that says Duskwood Police on the sign. Duskwood must not have that much crime. Well, not until this, I suppose.

“Thank you.” I tell him as I reach over to undo my seatbelt and climb out of the car. “This is a nice ride, by the way.”

He raises a hand in some mock-salute. “Need me to pick you up?”

“Nah.” I shake my head. “Think I’ll explore the town for a little bit.”

“Suit yourself.” He shrugs and then he’s off.

I square my shoulders and take a deep breath before opening the door to the police station. It wasn’t like Alan asked me to come down here. He hadn’t. Even during the investigation into Richy’s death and Hannah’s kidnapping, when he questioned us, he never asked me to come to Duskwood. We’d done way too many video calls and phone calls and at one point, I had asked if he thought it would be easier for me to come to Duskwood, to which he responded back, are you ready for that?

No, I hadn’t been. I’m not even so sure I was now. But knowing that Jake was alive, that here was the last place was, I had to try.

“Can I help you?” The woman at the front desk asks.

I clear my throat. “I was wondering if I could speak to Alan Bloomgate. I’m one of—I was involved in the Hannah Donfort case. My name is [MC].”

Her eyes widen. “Give me a moment.” She stands and heads to some back office—which looks to me more like a closet—and then returns with a clipped smile. “He’ll be right out.”

Apparently, she isn’t lying, because not two minutes later, Alan is stepping out from the same door and staring me down. I hold his gaze and hope it says that I’m not here to argue. I will tell him my truth, but only my truth, not Hannah’s, not Jake’s, not anybody else’s.

“I was wondering when I would see you.” He says.

I shrug one shoulder. “Isn’t a few months later better than never?”

“Let’s go into my office.” He says, and leads me around the desk and back into the closet space he had come out of. He sits behind the desk and motions for me to take a seat opposite him. “I’m just going to guess you’re not here to talk about Miss Donfort.”

“I want to see them.” I tell him. “His things. I want to see them for myself. And whatever you want from me in return, I’ll give to you.”

“You’re playing a dangerous game here, [MC].”

“He isn’t a game to me.” I snap back and then sit back and try to relax. “I appreciate that you called me. It’s—I helped you find Hannah. I would do it again. Even with knowing the things that we do now, I would do it all again. That’s how much that group means to me. That’s how much he means to me. I’m not asking you to break any rules or to lie for him or to—to let him hide in your basement for the next five years. I’m just asking you to show me what you found.”

He stares me down for a moment. Then, he sighs, says “wait here for a minute” and disappears to another room. When he comes back, it’s with an evidence bag in his hand filled with the objects I saw on his bodycam footage. My breath hitches in my throat.

“I can’t let you touch them.” He says as he lays them in front of me.

I stare into the eyes of the mask. “Did you tell anybody that he’s alive?”

“I don’t know that he’s alive,” is all the answer he gives, which is an answer to my question. I slide my gaze down to the black hoodie, to the dirtied sleeves and muddy hood, and think about the fact that Jake wore this. I’m so close to him.

And yet I’ve never been further away from him.

“Thank you.” I tell him. “For—for this. And for listening to me about Hannah. If you hadn’t, I—I don’t know what would have happened. How much longer he would have gone on for. If he would have ever stopped.”

Alan’s silent for a minute. Then, he clears his throat. “You know, it was strange to me. Both Hannah and yourself swore to me that neither of you knew the other.”

“I don’t.” I swear.

It was one of the (albeit many) things that didn’t make sense to me. How Hannah got a hold of my number. How she sent it to Thomas. She’d told Alan she hadn’t really remembered texting him my number at all.

“I believe you.” He reassures. “I just think it’s strange. One mistake, if you can call it that, and you throw yourself into a missing persons case to help a stranger.”

“They’re not strangers.” Even though Hannah is kind of still a stranger.

“But they were.” Alan reasons. “You had no reason to say yes to helping Thomas. I doubt anybody would have held it against you if you turned the other way. But you decided to follow this until the end. To make sure they found Hannah. And you care about them. Maybe that’s why I find that I’m more lenient with you than maybe I should be. Why you’re sitting across from me right now calling the shots. Why I’m not asking you about the hacker.”

“I wouldn’t tell you if you did.” I look him in the eye so he knows I’m telling the truth.

He returns my gaze. “Maybe that’s the other reason.”

“Hm.” I acknowledge before I turn my gaze away—from him, from the objects that I know belong to Jake and it takes everything in me not to snatch them up and run. “Well. Thank you for allowing me to steal some of your time. For letting me—” I cut myself off before I say something that makes me break down in a fit of tears in front of him. “—just thank you.”

Leaving the station is easier than coming in. I’m still not any closer to knowing where Jake is than I was when I arrived here, but there’s a comfort in knowing he walked these streets. I wonder what he would think if he knew I was here. He hadn’t wanted me to come to Duskwood when everything was happening…but now that it was over, would he be happy that I was here? That I had come to Duskwood to piece together where he might have gone? Would he track my location and come to find me and…or was I grasping at straws?

It felt like I had just gotten him back. Not really, not entirely…but knowing that he was alive, that he was out there somewhere, maybe thinking of me and looking for ways to come back, to live the life we talked about when he asked me if I was sure…that was worth it. The thought that we could maybe someday have that—even if it was a twenty percent chance.

I check my phone again to see a new message from Ash. She’s asking me if I’ve heard from Charlie in the last few hours. Apparently, he’s AWOL, and I want to help, really, but…it doesn’t really feel like that’s where I am at the moment. Not just physically—obviously—but mentally. We got lucky with Hannah. And that was really only because we had Jake. Adam didn’t have a Jake. Or…maybe he did and I just hadn’t met him yet. But I already had a Jake and I didn’t want another one.

Maybe—if I found him, I could convince him to help. That was a big maybe. Not because I thought Jake would say no. He would say yes to anything I asked of him. The maybe was whether or not I could find him. More likely, the maybe was whether or not he would find me.

Three months ago, I would have been able to come to Duskwood and have no shortage of things I wanted to do and people I wanted to see. Now, as I stand outside Duskwood’s police station, I feel nothing but loneliness. Nobody knows I’m here. I could pass Thomas on the street and he wouldn’t even know it. I could run into Jessy at the library and she would walk by me without even a second thought. Why would they? I hadn’t told them I was here.

So, with nothing left to do, I walked. Toward the town center. Toward the library that Jessy showed me on our walk through Duskwood. Toward the Rainbow Café where I knew that Cleo and Hannah had spent a lot of their time. Toward the Black Swan. Toward—

Ah, what the hell.

I had nothing better to do and The Aurora seemed like a great place to drown my sorrows. To think about my next steps. To figure out—now that I was in Duskwood—what I planned to do. The thing about Jake being so secretive (and on the run) was that I couldn’t retrace his steps. I wasn’t able to ask if anyone had seen him. One, because he would make sure nobody had. And two, because three months was a long time to forget somebody’s face if you didn’t know who you were looking for.

I pull open the door to the bar and step inside. Immediately, I’m hit with the stench of whiskey and a handful of chatter. Duskwood’s a small town. And The Aurora definitely proves it. The bartenders move melodically around each other, serving patrons on the other side of the bar. If you walk down further, there’s a handful of tables.

And dead in the center is a table with my friends. Or, some of them. Dan and Cleo and Lilly. Could I still call them my friends? Ex-friends, maybe? Acquaintances? I didn’t know what they were. Or how to address them. It wasn’t like we had gotten into a fight. We didn’t stop talking for any reason other than that we did. We stopped talking.

I make a beeline for the bar to avoid a confrontation and plant myself on one of the stools. One of the bartenders—a girl cute with bleach blonde hair and brown Bambi eyes—asks what I want and I channel my inner Dan to order a whiskey—neat.

Looking over my shoulder, I focus on the table of them. On Lilly, who’s smiling at something Cleo said. On Dan, who’s the only one of them who actually knows I’m here. But even he’s focused on the conversation they’re having. It’s strange—to see Dan a part of something I’m not sure he would have been before. It’s nice.

“[MC]?”

I turn my head away from the table of my friends and focus my attention across the bar on someone I should’ve expected to see. “Phil.”

“I thought I recognized your voice from when we talked.” He smiles. “I wasn’t sure, but I saw you staring longingly at them—” He nods towards Dan and Cleo and Lilly. “—and I knew. What brings you around here? I expected you to show up maybe a few months ago, but by now, I thought you’d moved on without us.”

I was tired of the words move on. Like I’d had a choice. Like the people from this town might open their arms and welcome me back into their lives. So I’d been part of the group who’d saved Hannah Donfort. So had a lot of people. It didn’t make me special and everyone here knew it.

I offer him a smile in return. “I’m looking for somebody.”

“Anybody I know?” He asks.

I shake my head. “Nah. At least nobody you would recognize.” I pause. “How’s Jessy?”

“She’s—Jessy.” He answers, like that is an answer. “I don’t know if she’ll ever really be okay with the way things happened with Richy. I wouldn’t expect her to. Obviously. But I don’t know. I think I just thought she would have gone back to her normal life by now. And then I remember that most of her life revolved around him. He was her best friend. She worked for him. And I’m trying to be patient about that. But—” He shakes his head. “Maybe you should talk to her.”

“She doesn’t know I’m in town.”

“Okay.” He hums. “So, you’re not in town for my sister. And you’re not in town for your group of friends because they’re over there and you look like you’d rather be anywhere else. There’s always Hannah, but I don’t think you knew her that well. Or at all. Would I be right to assume this is about a certain hacker who helped to find Hannah?”

“He didn’t help find Hannah.” I defend. “He was the entire reason we found Hannah. I would have never been able to do it on my own. Even with the others’ help. He’s the only reason we found out about—” I pause before I say something I maybe shouldn’t. “It doesn’t matter. He’s the only reason we found her. Everything I did was just dumb luck.”

“That wasn’t what the news said.” A voice cuts in and I turn my attention from Phil to focus on the stranger that slides into the seat beside me. Not too close—a couple inches away. I don’t recognize him. I don’t know him. But I don’t know every person in Duskwood. Maybe a total of like nine or ten. “I’m sorry to interrupt. But I heard you had a lot to do with finding Hannah Donfort. The news said you were some kind of hero.”

I offer him a tight smile. “That’s nice of them. But…if they knew my—friend—knew what he did to find her, I don’t think I would be as much of a hero as everybody says.”

“That’s noble.” He says, eyes meeting mine, and it strikes me at once how handsome he is. He has dark hair. Bright green eyes. Focus, [MC]. I scold. You have a…a someone.

My phone buzzes.

ERIC SENT A PHOTO.

ERIC: What do you make of this?

I sigh and click on the photo. It’s of—some object. Much like the one that was addressed to me on the envelope in Adam’s glove compartment. The image is a bit different—but I don’t know enough about what it means to have an answer as to why.

ME: Was this one addressed to me?

ERIC: Nope. Ash.

“Are you okay?” Phil asks.

I clear my throat. “I’m a popular person—apparently.” A thought strikes. “Have you ever heard of a place called Redlog Pines?”

Phil frowns. “No.”

I turn to look at the stranger. “You?”

“Redlog Pines is a small town about two hundred miles north of Duskwood.” He answers. “Known for their wooded forests, much like Duskwood.”

“Why are you looking into a place with forests as creepy as ours?” Phil asks, incredulously. “Didn’t you get enough of that with Hannah’s case?”

“Yeah.” I sigh. “You would think.”

“Hey, [MC]!”

I wince at the sound of Dan’s voice. Shooting Phil a look that screams please help me to which he shakes his head amusedly, I turn and plaster on a fake smile as I take in the shocked looks on Cleo and Lilly’s faces. I should have known better than to come to The Aurora and talk to Phil when the three of them were having a conversation across the room. I should have known they would sooner or later see me. I just hoped it was later.

“Hey.” I hop off my stool and make my way across the bar to them. “It’s, uh, fancy seeing the three of you here.”

“What are you doing here?” Cleo asks.

“I haven’t really figured that out.” My eyes meet Lilly’s. “It sounds crazy to say it out loud. But I was hoping that—I’m not sure if Lilly told you—”

“That Jake’s alive.” Cleo nods. “None of us ever really thought he wasn’t.”

I don’t think she means it as a dig—but it still feels like one. Like she’s saying you gave up on him you gave up on him you gave up on him even though she’s not and she didn’t really know him and the only person I can talk to at this table who even might understand is Lilly and even—Jake didn’t confide in her the way he did me.

“Right.” I acknowledge. “So I thought that maybe if I came here, I could trace his steps from when he was here and—I haven’t really thought that far ahead. It’s not like I thought he left me any clues in the forest or anything like that. I don’t think he expected me to be here. He hadn’t wanted me to be the last time we talked. But that was before everything happened.”

Lilly’s eyes track behind me. “Does Jake still have Nymos on your phone?”

“Uh.” I furrow my brows. “I think so. I hadn’t heard from him in a while, but I went back and read through our messages after I talked to Alan and…my phone glitched, like it used to when Jake had hacked it. And then this message appeared on my screen.”

“And by chance, can Nymos track your location?”

“What—” I shake my head. “Maybe. I don’t think I ever really asked him. It didn’t seem necessary at the time.”

“Uh huh.” She focuses on me once more. “Let’s say, for one minute, that Jake has access to Nymos who has access to your location.”

Cleo must catch onto something I’m not sure of. “Jake didn’t want you here.”

“Uh, thank you?”

“You know that’s not what I mean.” She waves me off. “He didn’t want you in Duskwood. He had been adamant about that when we were talking about the mine. That’s why he went. If you showed up in Duskwood—”

“Nymos would have alerted him.” Dan finishes.

“Okay…” I’m not entirely sure I’m on the same page as them. “So—you think that Jake found out when I came to Duskwood.”

“Correct.” Lilly beams like she just solved life’s greatest mystery.

“And you think he would—come find me?”

She smiles sympathetically at me—like I’m the world’s biggest idiot for not realizing what she has been trying to say sooner. “I think he already has.”

“You think Jake’s in Duskwood.” I deadpan.

“[MC].” Cleo grabs my shoulders and turns me around. “We think he’s in this bar.”

Stranger, as I had nicknamed him—AKA the guy sitting beside me at the bar, with Phil and Redlog Pines (which he probably only knew about because of me) and the whole Hannah being kidnapped and not taking any of the credit thing—was looking back at me. So was Phil. Like they thought I was the crazy one. Like it would’ve been so hard for him to look and me and say it’s me or anything that might have clued me into the fact that—

“Jake?” I whisper, because I’ve lost quite a bit of sleep over the past couple of months and I’m not one hundred percent sure what—or who—I’m seeing is real. “Are you here?”

He tilts his head and smiles at me. Actually smiles. A bit shyly, like it’s something he’s not used to doing, but maybe like it’s something he could get used to. And I think about how terrible I probably look right now because I’m not wearing makeup and my hair is tousled from constantly pulling at it and my clothes are wrinkled from the plane and the police station and I look like a mess. But our relationship has never been about looks. Clearly. I didn’t even know the person I’d been talking to until Lilly and Cleo and even Dan pointed out the obvious.

“If I—” I close my eyes and open them again. Nope. Still there. “I need you to still be there by the time I reach you because it’s been a—” I sniffle. “—it’s been a rough few months and I don’t think I could handle you disappearing again.”

He stands from the stool he was sitting on and shuffles his feet. Like he’s not quite sure where he’s supposed to stand. If he thinks about moving, I’ll tackle him onto the floor of The Aurora and then apologize to Phil later. It feels like everything I wanted is right here in front of me. And I’m scared to death that it’s not real.

“What’s one thing you would take with you if you were stranded on an island?”

His smile stretches. “My computer.”

And that—that’s what breaks me. I think I might start blubbering like an idiot but I don’t remember the time it takes for me to cross the measly twenty feet between us. All I remember is grabbing his black hoodie—because of course—and dragging him to me. I don’t kiss him, despite how much I want to, because I don’t want our first kiss to be tainted with my snot and tears. Instead, I bury my face in his collarbone and wrap my arms around his neck and hold on for dear life.

Because I can. Because he isn’t dead.

“Y—You’re here.” I pull back and cup his face with my hands. “How are you here?”

“You came to Duskwood.” He responds, and then—hesitantly—he presses his lips to my forehead in a kiss. “Alan called you.”

“He found your things in the forest.” I whisper back. “He said they’d been there a while. The police hadn’t searched the forest because they assume you died in the mine.”

“They aren’t looking for me here.” He confirms. “I didn’t expect it to take so long for them to find my belongings, but I anticipated that you would find out. At the time, it wasn’t safe for me to reach out and contact you. They kept on my trail for a while before they assumed I died in the mine with Richy.”

“Why didn’t you contact me then?” I ask. “Is it because of what I last messaged you? I didn’t mean it—I swear, I thought you were dead. If I had known you were alive, I would have waited, however long it took. I wasn’t trying to give up on you.”

“Hey.” He places both hands on either side of my face. “I know. I know that, [MC]. That was never why I didn’t reach out to you. I know you said you wanted this life with me. But I didn’t want that for you. But I was selfish. I couldn’t let you go. So I was trying to find a way to make both of those things true. But I was always coming back to you.”

“And did you?”

“Come back to you?” He asks.

I sniffle. “Find a way to make both of those things true.”

“Not entirely.” He admits. “Nymos alerted me you had boarded a plane headed in the direction of Duskwood and I—” He shook his head. “I knew I would find you here.”

“You could have found me sooner.”

He lets go of my face and he feels like he takes my skin with him. “It wasn’t that easy.”

“It could have been.” I demand.

I’m angry again. Now that I know he’s alive and okay and that he could have found me, I’m angry that he didn’t. I told him I would choose that life with him. Over and over and over. He didn’t need to make the decision for me. He didn’t need to try and protect me. And yes, maybe the fact that he did makes my heart flutter a tiny little bit, but that’s besides the point.

“I told you before you left me.” I tell him and I’m aware it sounds like we’ve been in a relationship for five years and I’m aware that everybody in here is watching and listening in on our conversation and they probably all know we’re who we are, two people involved in helping to find the kidnapped Hannah Donfort, and maybe that’s all we’ll ever be in this town. But I would rather be the girl who found Hannah Donfort in Duskwood with him than be me anywhere else. “You told me you would let me go with you.”

“That was before I told you I loved you.”

My heart skips a beat. It screams I love you I love you I love you back, but I say— “What does that have to do with anything?”

He looks somewhat amused. Like he knows I would never hold it against him. It’s clear to both of us that I wouldn’t because even though I’m glaring up at him with my furrowed eyebrows and my lips pouted, I’m still pressed tightly against him. His hands—even though they’ve moved from my face—are now resting on my hips. Pulling my tighter to him. There’s no space in between us. If it was up to me, I’m pretty sure there never would be again.

“[MC].” He says, and oh god I wish he would say my name every day for the rest of his life. “Have I—in the short time we have known each other—ever struck you as the type of person who says I love you? But with you…” His words are a whisper against my lips. “It’s easy to fall back into old emotions with you.”

“I want to be angry with you.” I tell him.

He shakes his head. “No, you don’t.”

“No, I don’t.” I agree. “But I might be if you don’t kiss me.”

He brought one finger underneath my chin and tilted it up until our lips were separated by a fraction of an inch. My eyelids fluttered. I didn’t care that everyone in here was about to see just how much Jake meant to be. I didn’t care because I had waited too long for this. And then—just as I’m leaning toward him to press our lips together, he whispers— “[MC]?”

“Hm.” I acknowledge.

“Who’s Eric?”

My eyelids crack open and I shove at his chest. “That’s what you’re worried about right now? Here I am, in front of you, covered in snot and tears and who-knows-what-else because you’re here right now, and you’re worried about some guy I don’t even know?”

“Who’s Eric?” He repeats.

“Ugh.” I run my hands through my hair and take a step back. “I don’t know. He’s the other side of Thomas or whatever you want to call him. If we lived in a different town.” I glare back at him and try not to admit that I think his jealous side is a little cute. “He messaged me. Thought I picked up his friend from some parking lot and I didn’t, but his friend sent him my number, and it was Hannah all over again. I’m trying to help them.”

“This Adam has been sending you a lot of videos.”

“You know I hate when you hack my phone.” I complain, even though I really don’t. Even though I had prayed for him to help me with this case. “I really don’t know Adam. Like—even less than I know Eric.

“But you know Eric.”

“For like a week.” I reassure. “He added me to this group chat with him and like three other friends of his. They’re desperate to find Adam who has apparently dropped off the face of the earth and I don’t know what to do. I had you with Hannah’s case. And you knew her. And they—” I look over my shoulder at Cleo and Dan and Lilly, who are pretending like they’re not listening in even though I know and Jake knows they are. “—they knew her. And obviously Adam’s friends must know him but I don’t and you don’t and there is no Jake in Redlog Pines.”

“I don’t trust him.” He shakes his head. “Any of them.”

I laugh. “Jake, you didn’t trust half the people in this bar when we first started talking.” I look over at Phil and then Dan. “It doesn’t mean they committed a crime. If I had backed off when you asked me to help you find Hannah, we may never have.”

“I thought that was all thanks to me.” He sounds smug, like that little smiley face he loved to annoy me with (AKA make me fall in love with him). “Did he flirt with you?”

“No.” I deadpan. “I think he was focused on his missing friend.”

“I was focused on my missing sister.” He shoots back.

I close my mouth. Alright. He has a point. But I wasn’t flirting with Eric. He was focused on finding Adam and I was focused on mourning—and then finding—Jake. Maybe it felt like Eric and I were two sides of the same coin. Maybe that’s why I agreed to help him. Because I didn’t want to happen to him what I thought had happened to Jake—to me.

“You’re being ridiculous.” I say instead. “How do you think I could ever entertain the idea of being with somebody else when for the past three months—more than that if you count the time we have actually had together—I’ve been focused on you? On discussing Hannah with you and then talking to you about anything and everything and then worrying about you and then hating you a little for convincing me you should me the one to go into the mine and then mourning you when it was hard to even think about you and then finding you?”

His eyes are wide. I think I’ve rendered him speechless. Which—serves him right. I know he’s not somebody who serves their feelings up on a silver platter. I know that. Obviously, I knew that from the first time I spoke to him. Back when he was nothing more than ??? and I was almost convinced that Dan was right and he was the Man Without A Face—a thought that I now hate with everything in me. But I need him to trust me. Jealousy streak and FBI and the missing persons cases aside, he needs to trust me.

“Trust me.” I cup the sides of his face again. “He’s nothing like you.”

He swallows. “Some people might consider that to be a perk.”

“I don’t.” I say.

And then I’m kissing him and it feels like coming home.

#duskwood #duskwood everbyte #duskwood game #duskwood jake #duskwood jake x mc #moonvale everbyte #moonvale #duskwood fanfic #duskwood mc #everbyte game #everbyte studios

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rishiimaa · 4 months ago

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Heey everyone!! Apologies about the late responses, usually when I get home from classes I’m always tired and worn out, so I never usually use my free time to write, it’s always sleeping :(

“What if JJK men gave their kid a new sibling?”

Yuji, Megumi

(Implied fem!reader)

(angst if you squint)

Fluffy, crack

————————————

Yuji Itadori

You groggily rubbed your eyes, feeling the familiar weight of the early morning as you shuffled down the hallway. It was too quiet, which meant only one thing—C/N was still asleep. You glanced at the clock and panicked. School started in less than an hour!

You hurried to C/N’s room, fully prepared to yank the covers off and start the usual morning routine when a sudden wave of nausea hit you. You barely had time to react before you were dashing to the bathroom, hurling over the toilet.

“Ugh, not again,” you muttered, wiping your mouth and standing up. You didn’t think much of it at first, chalking it up to a weird bug or maybe something you ate. But after days of this, the nagging thought in the back of your mind grew stronger: could you be pregnant?

Yuji didn’t seem too concerned, even when you mentioned the possibility. He shrugged it off with his usual bright smile, saying, “I’m sure it’s nothing! Probably just stress.”

But you weren’t so sure. Finally, you decided to put your suspicions to the test. Literally.

The result? Positive.

You stared at the little plus sign, a mixture of excitement and nerves bubbling up inside you. You couldn’t wait to tell Yuji. When you did, his eyes went wide with surprise before he broke into a huge grin. “Another little one, huh? C/N’s gonna be thrilled!”

Well, that was the plan. But how do you tell a kid that they’re about to have a sibling? And how do you keep Yuji from turning it into a complete disaster?

After school, C/N bounded through the door, full of energy as usual. Yuji pulled him aside with a serious expression, which instantly caught C/N’s attention.

“C/N, there’s something important we need to talk about,” Yuji began, trying his best to look wise and fatherly. You had a feeling this wasn’t going to end well.

C/N’s eyes widened. “Am I in trouble?”

“No, no, nothing like that!” Yuji quickly reassured him. “It’s just that, uh, well… do you know where babies come from?”

Your heart dropped. Oh no, here we go.

C/N tilted his head, clearly confused. “Um… storks?”

Yuji blinked, momentarily thrown off. “Uh, not exactly. You see, when two people… um, really love each other…” He started to fumble over his words, throwing in a few random terms he vaguely remembered from health class, completely losing C/N in the process.

You could see the poor kid’s eyes glazing over as Yuji continued his awkward explanation. Finally, you stepped in, placing a gentle hand on Yuji’s shoulder. “What your dad’s trying to say is… you’re going to be a big brother.”

C/N’s face lit up with excitement. “Really? I’m gonna have a little brother or sister?”

You nodded, relieved that the message had finally gotten through. “Yup! You’re going to have someone new to play with and take care of.”

At first, C/N looked a bit skeptical, as if trying to figure out if this was some kind of joke. But then, a big smile spread across his face, and he started bouncing on his toes. “That’s so cool! I’m gonna teach them everything I know! We’re gonna have so much fun!”

All the tension and nerves melted away as you and Yuji exchanged relieved smiles. C/N didn’t mind another sibling—in fact, he was thrilled at the idea.

Yuji wrapped his arms around you and C/N, pulling you both into a big hug. “Guess we’re gonna be even busier now, huh?”

You laughed, feeling a warmth spread through your chest. “Yeah, but in the best way possible.”

With C/N still buzzing with excitement and Yuji grinning like an idiot, you knew that everything was going to be just fine.

————————————

Megumi Fushiguro

The day starts like any other, with you, Megumi, and your daughter, C/N, heading out for some school shopping. It’s a perfect family outing, and you’re excited to spend the day together. C/N holds your hand tightly as you browse through the aisles, her little eyes lighting up at every colorful display.

As you’re helping her pick out some new clothes, your gaze drifts over to the baby section. The tiny onesies, the soft blankets—something stirs inside you. It’s an old, familiar feeling, one you haven’t entertained in a while. You miss having a newborn in your arms, that sweet, quiet time when everything was new and magical. But you’ve always agreed that one child was enough. Still, the thought lingers.

“Mama, look! Can I get this?” C/N’s voice snaps you out of your reverie. She’s holding up a toy with wide, hopeful eyes. Without thinking, you nod and smile, giving in to her request. “Of course, sweetheart.”

You and C/N find Megumi, who’s patiently waiting in another section of the store. The three of you continue browsing through the mall, enjoying each other’s company. But as you walk, a strange sensation washes over you. Your vision blurs, and you suddenly feel dizzy, like the world is tilting sideways.

Megumi notices immediately. “Are you okay?” he asks, concern breaking through his usual calm demeanor.

Before you can respond, the world goes dark. You faint, but not before you feel Megumi’s arms catch you, keeping you from hitting the floor. The last thing you hear is C/N’s terrified scream.

When you wake up, you’re in a hospital bed, the room bright and sterile. Your head feels heavy, and for a moment, you struggle to remember where you are. That’s when you hear a familiar voice. Megumi is talking quietly to a doctor, and there’s something in his tone that worries you.

You turn your head to see him, his expression unreadable, but there’s a hint of shock in his eyes. The doctor says something you can’t quite make out, and then Megumi turns to see you’re awake. Instantly, he’s at your side, his usual composure breaking as he hurries over.

“What’s going on?” you ask, your voice shaky. “Where’s C/N?”

“She’s with Yuji,” Megumi reassures you, his hand gently squeezing yours. You sigh in relief, but there’s still a nagging worry at the back of your mind. You try to sit up, but the room spins, and you’re forced to lie back down. Megumi helps you, his hand steadying you.

“You fainted in the mall,” he explains, his voice soft. “I caught you before you hit the ground. But…” He hesitates, his eyes searching yours. “The doctor thinks you might be pregnant. They took some tests while you were unconscious, and we’re waiting for the results.”

Your eyes widen in shock, the words sinking in slowly. Pregnant? You remember standing in the mall, staring at those baby clothes, thinking how much you missed having a newborn. And now this?

Megumi rests his head gently on your stomach, his voice laced with regret. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs. “I should’ve noticed something was off.”

But instead of feeling worried, you suddenly start to laugh, tears of happiness spilling down your cheeks. You wrap your arms around him, pulling him close. “Don’t be sorry, Megumi. I’ve… I’ve been wanting another baby.”

He pulls back, startled, his dark eyes searching your face for any sign that you’re joking. But when he sees the sincerity in your expression, he hugs you tighter, burying his face in your neck.

After a moment, he pulls back slightly, his serious expression replaced with a hint of nervousness. “Oh, how are we gonna explain this to C/N?”

shit.”

A few hours later, the doctor hands you the results. You and Megumi stare at the paper, your hearts pounding in sync. It’s positive. You look up at each other, and without another word, you’re in each other’s arms, Megumi pressing small kisses to your temple, your cheeks, anywhere he can reach.

When you tell everyone the news, Yuji brings C/N home. She runs to you, her little face full of worry. “Mommy, are you okay?”

You smile and reassure her, “Yes, sweetheart, I’m fine.” Megumi scoops her up in his arms, holding her close.

“How would you like to be a big sister?” he asks, his tone light and teasing.

C/N’s reaction is immediate. “No!” she exclaims, causing your heart to drop.

“What do you mean no?” Megumi asks, clearly surprised.

“If I become a big sister, then I’ll have to deal with a baby who acts like Papa! And a kid like Papa is bad!” she declares, crossing her arms in a way that’s all too familiar.

Megumi looks genuinely offended. “Hey…what’s that supposed to mean?”

Before their bickering can escalate, you interrupt with a kiss on C/N’s cheek, your heart full as you reassure her, “Don’t worry, sweetie. The baby won’t be like Papa. You already act like him enough for both of you.”

C/N pouts for a moment but eventually melts into your kiss, nodding as she finally agrees to be a big sister. Relief washes over you, but you notice that Megumi is still a bit peeved at what C/N said before.

He leans in closer, narrowing his eyes at C/N.

“Hey…How about you repeat what you said.”

————————————

HI!! SINCE EVERYONE REQUESTED IT TO BE POSTED I’LL POST IT 😭 IF YOU WANT A CERTAIN GUY THEN PLEASE REQUEST IT :3

#jjk #jjk x reader #megumi fushiguro #drabble #cute #yuji itadori #jjk fluff #pregnant #rant post #haha #C/N #Y/N #jjk yuji #jjk megumi

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writtenfangirl · 1 year ago

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Car's Outside

Inspired by Car's Outside by James Arthur!

This went through an extensive rewrite/editing process so hopefully, it's good!

I tried matching up the dates as much as possible so hopefully things don't get confusing <3

Edit: I posted this before qualifying for the Mexico GP thinking “I need something to make me feel better” after the inevitable news that the GP will break my heart only to wake up to news that Charles is on Pole with Carlos at P2 and Danny Ric at P4. I just need this to happen so bad I will literally cry if this happens

I'm packin' my bags that I didn't unpack the last time I'm sayin', "See you again," so many times, it's becoming my tagline But you know the truth, I'd rather hold you Than try to catch this flight So many things I'd rather say But for now, it's goodbye

“I’m sorry,” Charles frowned. His breath fanned across her face, his forehead connected to her own. Y/N’s eyes were closed, head tilted upwards as she breathed him in.

Y/N knew Charles had to leave. It’s his job. Unlike most couples, she didn’t have the luxury of spending every minute of every second of every day with her boyfriend. Not when he was a world-famous Formula One driver whose job meant he was in a different city every week. And though Y/N enjoyed the privilege of freely going in and out of every paddock in the world because of her connections, it wasn’t a privilege she could exercise frequently. Not when she was an international lawyer also tasked with jet setting to other countries of the world.

But they loved each other and so they made it work. Or, at least, tried to.

“Don’t apologize,” Y/N said with a rueful smile. Beneath the musky smell of his cologne, Y/N could smell him, familiar and deep, as if the very essence of him had lodged itself in her nose, up her brain, and made a home for himself. “I understand.”

“I wish I didn’t have to go,” Charles sighed, voice deep, as he, too, breathed her in deeply. “I’d rather hold you, here, forever, than catch a stupid plane.”

“You say that now, but when you win a race, you’ll forget all about me,” she teased, opening her eyes to meet Charles’s brilliant greens.

“Not true, cherie. You’re always the first thing I think of when I win. Every win is for you.” And, as if to emphasize the point, he placed a soft kiss on her nose.

Y/N rolled her E/C eyes, a wide smile stretching across her face at the kiss despite herself. “Charles, I’m already your girlfriend. There’s no need for your sweet words to convince me to be yours.”

“It’s the truth, cherie,” he chuckled, “I always think of you first, win or lose. That’s how much I love you.”

“I love you, too.” And then she pulled his face to hers, placing a kiss on his lips that had him grinning against her like a little school boy offered candy by his mother. He pulled her to him tightly, his arms wrapping around her waist as her hands wound itself around his soft hair. Kissing him always made her feel so dizzy, like the very air in her lungs left her to make space for him. She didn’t mind it one bit. She’d make space for him in every inch of her if she could.

But one of them had to be responsible and it certainly wouldn’t be Charles. So, despite not wanting to, Y/N found herself pulling away, breathing heavy as her hands trailed from his head, down his neck and on his chest. She resisted the urge to smirk at finding his heart beating just as fast as her own.

“You’re making it harder for me to leave, cherie,” Charles panted, his hair mused where she threaded her fingers.

“Good,” she grinned as she reached up and flattened his head, “you should miss me as much as I miss you. Now go, Leclerc, or else I’ll receive a phone call from Carlos complaining that you kept them waiting.”

“I’ll see you again, cherie,” he smiled, eyes tinged with sadness.

“Of course you will. Good bye for now, mon amour.”

“Good bye for now.” And with one last kiss, Charles left. The door to their house closed behind him, the click echoing around their empty living room. All Y/N could hear was the sound of her own breathing, and when she was sure that he was far enough away, she finally released a sob that had her chest caving, her heart suddenly feeling like beads inside a hollow rattle.

I'm starin' at the same four walls in a different hotel It's an unfamiliar feelin' but I know it so well Oh, but you know the truth, I'd rather hold you Than this mobile in my hand But I guess it'll do, 'cause for you I would run up my phone bill

You say I'm always leavin' You, when you need me the most But the, the car's outside

Y/N didn’t think he was serious about getting on a flight back home, especially when she knew how busy he was on Friday on a race week. Not to mention the fact that the race this week was in Mexico, halfway across the world. But here he was, in the flesh, staring at her with those bright green eyes that she adored so much.

Of course, she should have expected this. Charles was nothing if not determined and when he said he was going to do something, he usually did it.

“You wanted to talk, so let’s talk.” Charles said as he barreled into their shared apartment, pushing past her and towards the living room, “I can’t stay long. Joris and Enzo are waiting outside to take me back to the airport.”

Past the front door, Y/N saw Lorenzo leaning against an expensive looking sports car next to Joris. Enzo as lifted a hand in greeting while Joris smiled at her. Y/N returned the greetings before she closed the door and turned to her boyfriend. Her brows were furrowed as she frowned at him, following him to their spacious living room. “What are you doing here? You have a race!”

“You wouldn’t answer my calls and I can’t race properly when I know we’re not okay.” Charles said as he ran his hands through his curls, sticking them up in odd angles. With a jolt, Y/N realized how long his hair was. The last time she saw him, he had just gotten a fresh cut from Pascale but now his hair was touching the nape of his neck. Has it really been that long?

Y/N took a deep breath before she spoke, gathering her patience as into a tight ball like freshly spun yarn. “Charles, this can wait—“

“No, it can’t,” Charles interjected, his words clipped and his tone sharp. “You were the one who wanted to talk and I’m already here so let’s talk. Do you want to end things or not, Y/N?”

“What?” She exclaimed, surprised at the sudden question. She wanted many things to happen but breaking up was definitely not on the list of things she wanted to do with him. Yes, they had their issues but she couldn’t imagine any of them could be solved by ending their relationship. “Of course not! Do you want to end things?”

Charles looked offended at the question. “No! I don’t want to end things. I want us to be together!”

“You sure don’t act like it!” She snapped before she could think about her next words. Part of her wished she could gobble up the words, stuff them back in her mouth before he could hear them but it was too late. Charles’ expression turned wounded, but his words held anger when he spoke.

“I told you about this before we started dating! I told you about my busy schedule. You came into this relationship with both eyes open, Y/N. Don’t act like you didn’t know about how busy I get!”

Y/N looked at him as if he’d grown two heads. She was beginning to get irrationally angry, and though Y/N was usually very good at compartmentalizing, there was something about the argument that had her wanting to scream. “Dammit, Charles! I know I signed up for this when we started dating but I also signed up for the breaks in between! I thought we could make it work then. But even during the breaks, you’re not here! And I make the time and I make the sacrifices to be here so imagine my disappointment when you don’t!”

“I told you to come to my races!” He yelled, his voice loud and echoing in their living room. His face was beginning to flush in anger, green eyes blazing as he spoke to her. “You’re always welcome there. I don’t know why you never come!”

“It’s hard to find any time to come to your races when I planned all of my time off around your breaks, Charles!” She yelled back. “Because, believe it or not, I don’t want to share you! Not when I barely see you as is. When I come to your races, I know you’ll be too busy doing your job to accommodate me and that’s okay. It’s more than fine. I’m happy to watch you do what you love to do. But, I want to at least see you. To feel you and hear you and talk to you. And I can’t do that during a race weekend because you’re busy and I refuse to be the clingy girlfriend trying to catch all of your attention. I planned my days off around your break period because I figured, that’s when I’ll see you more and actually spend some meaningful time together. But you’re never around! I get it, Charles. Ferrari comes first. I know what I signed up for. But lately, they’ve been coming second and third and fourth. When will it be my turn, Charles? Am I even on the list of your priorities?”

“Of course you are!”

“It sure doesn’t seem like it.”

Charles looked at her as if she’d struck him. “How can you say that when you know it’s not true. I love you, Y/N. You know that.”

She sighed, some of the fight leaving her body. “I do know that, Charles. I never said you didn’t love me. But just because you love me doesn’t mean I feel loved by you. I want to make things work. I try to make things work. But, sometimes it feels like you’re never around. And, I get it, you have a demanding job—“

“Don’t put all of this on me like your job is easy.” He scoffed, his eyes flashing in annoyance once again. “Your schedule is even more demanding than mine, and I’m sure that with your new job, you’ll have even less time for me.”

“Are you serious, Charles?” She hissed, her anger coming back in droves at his words, “You’re putting this on me? I make the time for you! Rather than seeing my family and friends during my breaks, I’m in Monaco for you and you always cancel on me at the last minute and I never complain! You were the one who missed our anniversary dinner!”

“And you miss my races!”

“You missed my promotion!”

“You never told me about your promotion!”

“How can I when you ditched me on our anniversary!”

“I told you why I missed it! The upgrades were important—“

“AM I NOT IMPORTANT, CHARLES?” She screamed. Briefly, she wondered if their neighbors could hear them, if Enzo and Joris could but she couldn’t bring herself to care. She couldn’t bring herself to look at him, couldn’t bring herself to lift her gaze at him as she said her next words softly, the fight leaving her body. “The anniversary wasn’t the only thing you missed. You missed my birthday, too. You didn’t even greet me but I took it to stride because I knew you were busy. I didn’t complain until now because I understood. Even when you promised me you’d fly home for your birthday so we can celebrate together and then you cancelled because of the Ferrari party and the interview, I understood. I plan all of my time off around you and never around my family or my friends, who, by the way, live in another country because I know you want to spend time with me. I always understand, Charles. I understand so much that sometimes I feel like I’m always making the sacrifices for our relationship and never you. And whenever I think to myself, I wish he’d choose me for once, it makes me feel like I’m a terrible person because I know you’re out there trying to achieve your dreams just like me and yet here I am, complaining that I don’t get enough time with you. You’re always promising to make it up to me but you never do and—” A familiar lump formed at the back of her throat, choking her words as a searing heat prickled the back of her eyes.

She loved Charles, she really did. But it was beginning to feel like that love was one sided. She wasn’t stupid. She knew what loving a man like him entailed. She expected that they’ll rarely see each other but at the rate things were going, they didn’t see each other at all. And judging by the way Charles was looking at her, with the anger in his eyes replaced by shame, he was beginning to realize that too.

“I missed your birthday?” Charles said taken aback.

“You were in Canada,” she shrugged miserably, “you were busy. I didn’t think I should remind my boyfriend when my birthday is. If you couldn’t remember, that just means you had more important things in mind.”

Shame coated his eyes as realization dawned on him. “I can’t believe I missed your birthday.”

She sniffled as she swiped at the tears that began to collect in her eyes. “It’s fine—“

“No, it’s not. I am an asshole, cherie,” Charles groaned as he pulled her in his embrace. His chest was warm, his arms even warmer as he tucked her head under his chin. “I’m so sorry. You’re right. I’m always apologizing to you and it’s not right. None of this is your fault. I’m sorry for saying those terrible things to you. I can’t believe you put up with me treating you like this for a whole year. Missing your birthday, and my birthday and our anniversary. Fuck, you’re right and it doesn’t make you a bad person to think those things because you’re right. I’m so sorry.”

Oh, darling, all of the city lights Never shine as bright as your eyes I would trade them all for a minute more But the car's outside And he's called me twice

Guilt, heavy and shameful, curled in his insides.

No wonder she was so upset with him. Every iota of her fury and more, he deserved for the shitty way he’s been treating her.

“I’m so sorry, cherie,” Charles mumbled against her hair. The smell of her shampoo, as familiar to him as his own was, invaded his sense. “I’m so sorry.”

He could feel her hands begin to wrap around his midsection. It was soft at first, tentative, before she tightened her hold on him like she was stuck in the middle of the sea and he was the lifeboat that saved her. He could feel her leaning her weight against him, the feel of her body a reassuring weight he didn’t realize he lost but was finding his whole life.

“I’m staying,” he said, pressing kisses against her head in between his words, “we’re going to celebrate everything. Your birthday, mine, our anniversary, even your promotion. You deserve as much. You deserve even more. Come fly with me, baby. Let’s go, wherever you want.”

“What do you mean?” Y/N said as she pulled away from him, eyes wide as she peered at him through her lashes.

“I’m staying here, in Monaco, with you.” He said slowly, conviction filling him as he said the words.

She gave him a dubious look. “Charles, it’s a race week. We both know you can’t miss that. It’s in Mexico for crying out loud! That’s why halfway across the world. You need to be back on the plane now if you want to make it back by Sunday.”

“I don’t care.” He said stubbornly. “None of it matters without you. Ferrari already took my breaks. I can sacrifice a race or two” And then his lips pulled into a rueful smile. “Besides, I’m not in the running for the championship anyway.”

Her eyes were still twinkling from the unshed tears, and despite the frown pulling at her lips, Charles had never thought she looked as beautiful as she did today. “But Charles, I have a job to do. I’m set to leave for London two days from now.”

His phone rang, interrupting their conversation. He fished it out of his pocket with a sigh, seeing Enzo’s face flashing on the screen. His arms were still wrapped around Y/N as he answered the phone

“Charles, nous devons partir,” Enzo urged.. (Charles, we need to leave.)

“I’m not going anywhere,” Charles replied, eyes trained on Y/N, who was watching the whole exchange with wide, reproachful eyes. “I’m right where I need to be.”

“Quoi?” (What)

“Cancel my flight, Enzo. I’m not going back. You and Joris can go home. Tell Maman I love her,” he said, ending the call before his brother could protest.

“Charles you can’t just leave in the middle of the weekend.” Y/N said, looking at him like he’d grown two heads.

“Yes, I can.” He said determinedly as he placed his hands on the side of her face, caressing her cheek as he stared deeply into her eyes in an effort to try and make her understand just how serious he really was. “I’m not racing this week. Or next week.”

“You’re going to miss Brazil too?”

“Yes. It’s time I choose you for once. I’ll race back in Vegas and Abu Dhabi but they’re lucky they’ll get even that. I chose them time and time again, cherie, and it’s not right. This is me making it up to you.” He pulled her face to his, placing a kiss on her lips. It was slow and languid, like the winding of a stopped clock that you’re trying to make right. Charles knew how lucky he was to have Y/N and she didn’t deserve to be forgotten, especially not like this. All he’s done was give her empty promises and if there was anyone in the world that deserved the best, it was her.

She pulled away from the kiss, loss of her making him groan. “What about my job? I have so much to do when I get to London. I won’t be in Monaco until the first week of November and the breaks will be far and few in between.”

“Then take me with you. Wherever you go, I’ll follow,” he said before pulling her into another kiss, this one searing and needy. He felt her pull him towards her, closing whatever distance was between them until their bodies lined flushed against the other. He could feel her figure through their clothes, feel the way her breath hitched as his hands found themselves on her waist, thumbs skimming the soft feel of her skin. She gasped at his touch and the feral feeling that seized him had the tether in him snapping. He kissed her harder, hands winding down to the back of her legs and lifting her. Almost instinctively, Y/N’s legs wrapped around his waist, her feet crossing at his back. Her hands wound themselves around his hair, pulling at the strands in a delicious way that made him shudder.

How could he choose Ferrari over and over again when they would never be able to make him feel this way? He doubted not even winning a race in Monaco would feel as she good as she does.

His phone rang again, interrupting their moment. Charles groans as he pulled away and Y/N’s laugh rang around their living room. If another phone call interrupts them again, he’s getting rid of this thing. He clicked the green button, Fred’s face flashing as he answered the call with one hand while the other continued to grip Y/N.

“Charles—“

“I’ll see you in Vegas, Fred.” Was the only thing he said before Charles clicked the red button and tossed the phone aside, focusing his whole attention back on his girlfriend.

But he's gonna have to wait tonight I'm not gettin' in the Addison Lee Unless you pack your bags You're comin' with me I'm tired of lovin' from afar And never being where you are Close the windows, lock the doors Don't wanna leave you anymore

“You mean it? You’re really skipping Mexico and Brazil for me?” Y/N asked, her voice hopeful as she spoke. Her arms were wrapped around his neck, fingers playing at the strands of his hair.

“I am.” He said with all the seriousness he could muster. “I love you, cherie, and I want to love you by your side. You’re my number one priority and I’m sorry that it took me so long to remember that. I know I’ll have to leave again but that doesn’t mean I have to leave you. I love you, cherie. Will you let me come with you?”

“Of course I will.” She smiled, before she leaning her face to him, continuing their kiss right were they left off.

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cupidcures · 6 months ago

Text

When Tulips Kiss | Hwang Hyunjin SMAU

CHAPTERS: 𝜗𝜚 TWENTY-EIGHT | TWENTY-NINE | 𝜗𝜚 THIRTY

WORD COUNT: 3k (not proofread)

CONTAINS: profanity, mentions of insecurities, mentions of cheating, soft boy hyunjin finally appears!

the second time?

“Wow… And here I thought you guys were actually getting somewhere.” Changbin sighed disappointedly while shaking his head at the same time. “I gotta give it to you though, you’ve got some fucking balls. I think the guy deserved the beating for instigating shit like that, to be honest. He was provoking you and he simply got what he was asking for, it was clear he wanted a reaction out of you.”

After Jeongin had left, the rest of the guys went inside Hyunjin’s room, demanding an explanation. So here they were, giving him their commentary and opinions on what happened.

“I was on your side up until the part you said you called Y/N a bitch and lashed out at her as well. You can’t blame her for checking up on the guy, he took a lot of hits, and MAYBEEEEE you went a little overboard. But like Changbin said, he was asking for it. Though, she could’ve done something to defend you.” Felix butted in as Hyunjin sat there quietly, nodding with each comment his friends add on.

“I wish I could take everything back. Well actually, I could live with knowing I beat Heeseung up twice, but hurting Y/N? Holy shit I’m literally setting myself up for failure.” Hyunjin covered his face with his hands and dragged his cheeks down, groaning.

“You should apologize as soon as possible. Even if you think she won’t forgive you, it’s better to apologize as soon as you can, rather than wait it off.” Chan patted Hyunjin’s back in comfort before smacking the back of his head.

“Hey!”

“Don’t start complaining now, that was barely anything compared to what you did to the poor dude.”

“Yeah yeah.. What do I even tell Y/N? She probably doesn’t even wanna talk to me.” Resting his chin on his hand, Hyunjin’s mind flashed with outcomes one after the other of what could end up happening when he apologized.

“If you really want to make things right, you need to tell her everything. And I mean EVERYTHING. Stop pussying out of telling her your side of what happened in high school. If you told her from the very start and if you weren’t stalling, this all could have been avoided. In fact, I’m almost positive that she would have stood up for you when Heeseung started talking all that shit.“ Minho rolled his eyes as Chan nodded at him in agreement.

“Tell her everything that you felt too. Not just what you think happened. You need to be clear with your feelings and how your mind processed everything. Be vulnerable with her, and she’ll open up to you.” Chan offered additional advice. “And for fucks sake, do NOT do this over text. This is something that is meant to be talked about IN PERSON.”

“She would probably slam the door in my face if I showed up. She definitely hates me now,” Hyunjin mumbled and pinched his nose bridge in annoyance, but he wasn’t annoyed at you. He was annoyed at himself.

How could he have been so reckless to break down all the progress the two of you had built up together?

“So what? Face it. At least you could tell yourself that you tried, and at least you could let her know that you’re trying to make things right.” Felix put his hand on Hyunjin’s shoulder with a determined look. “And don’t give up so easily either! I believe you can make things right!”

“Yah! You’re Hwang Hyunjin and you could get any and every girl you want, remember?! You got this! You can get your girl back, even if it takes longer than usual!! You just need to put in more effort!” Changbin joined in with Felix on the encouragement whilst wearing a smile on his face.

“She’s not just any other girl though. She’s everything to me and I can’t bear to think of the fact that I even hurt her. I fucked up really badly. I’ve already lost her once, I don’t think I can handle losing her again.” Hyunjin wallowed in his sadness as Minho let out a rather loud groan.

“Oh shut up and get your ass off the bed. YOU. ARE. GOING. Right now. You don’t wanna lose Y/N? The longer you wait to see her and apologize to her the more time you give her to slip through your fingers. Get your sorry ass up and show her just how sorry you are.” Minho grabbed Hyunjin’s car keys and shoved them into his hand before dragging him out of his room, through the hallway and the living room, and practically throwing him outside of the house.

“GO. APOLOGIZE.” Minho shouted sternly for the last time before slamming the door in his face.

Hyunjin blinked in surprise, not expecting this to happen at all. Despite that, he composes himself together and gets inside his car to rush on campus—to your dorm room—praying to anyone, anything up above who would listen to his hopes of you letting him explain everything.

Chuu was in the kitchen talking to her girlfriend on Facetime when she heard the knocking on the door entrance. Glancing at the top of her phone screen to check the time, it read that it was 11:23 PM.

“What the fuck? Who could be knocking at this hour?” Chuu whispered over the phone, her grip on it tightening subconsciously.

“Huh? Is everyone in the dorm already there?” Sooyoung, her girlfriend, asked in concern.

“Well, no. But they said they’ll be gone for the weekend. Should I open it?” Chuu looked at the door nervously, a small shiver running up her spine.

“Check through the peephole just in case. Be careful.” Sooyoung warned as Chuu nodded and slowly crept to the door, peeking out through the hole in the door.

Standing there was Hyunjin who was checking the watch on his wrist. Chuu watched him intently, confused as to why he was there.

“It’s just Hyunjin, Y/N’s… friend? I guess you could say that?” Chuu was still unaware of what happened that day, and so she still thought you and Hyunjin were friends. She watched Hyunjin look down at the floor and turn away. It wasn’t until he started walking away that Chuu finally opened the door.

“Hey, you here for Y/N?” She called out as Hyunjin’s head perked up, turning back around towards the dorm.

“Yes, actually. It is okay if I could come in and talk with her?” He asked awkwardly and fidgeted with his fingers, nervous that he’d get rejected without even having the chance to see you face to face. To his relief, Chuu nodded at his request and opened the door wider.

“Yeah, sure. She’s in the room, by the way. Don’t do anything inappropriate.” Chuu pointed her finger at his in an accusatory way but laughed right after, indicating that she was just joking around.

Hyunjin laughed along with Chuu a little bit before giving her his thanks and making his way toward the door of your room.

“Okay sorry Honey, I let him in but I’m back now~” Chuu hummed contently and went back to talking with Sooyoung.

Meanwhile, with Hyunjin, he knocked on your door softly so as to not startle you. “Y/N? It’s me, Hyunjin. Can we talk? Please?” He spoke in a gentle tone and waited for a reply. He was met with silence instead, so he considered just walking away and giving up. That was until he remembered his friends’ words to him.

“And don’t give up so easily either! I believe you can make things right!” Felix’s voice echoed in his mind.

“The longer you wait to see her and apologize to her the more time you give her to slip through your fingers. Get your sorry ass up and show her just how sorry you are.” Then Minho’s voice echoed.

They were right, he couldn’t back away now and risk losing you. Not again. Not ever.

“Y/N, I’m coming in, okay? Tell me now if you don’t want to see me tonight and I won’t. But I’ll be back tomorrow.” Hyunjin speaks out and still, no response. So he does what he said he would do, and he opens the door to the bedroom, only to find it empty.

Eyebrows furrowed in confusion, he looked around the room—which wasn’t even big, to begin with—for you, but you were nowhere to be found.

He sighed in disappointment and started to walk out to leave until he heard the door to the bathroom open, and there you were.

You stood there, frozen in shock as you made eye contact with the boy. If you had known that Hyunjin would be there waiting for you, you would have brought spare clothes to the bathroom and changed there instead. But you didn’t know, so you were standing there in a damp towel, water droplets pittering on the floor from your hair.

“I… wow.” Hyunjin’s mouth was agape and blood rushed to his cheeks seeing you. It’s not like he hasn’t seen you like this before. He has literally seen you naked before, but you still had the same effects on him, as if it was his first time seeing you like this. His mind went blank. Or maybe into a frenzy? Either way, he wasn’t thinking straight as he gawked at the sight of you. He was telling himself to look away, but his body wasn’t obeying him.

You stood there with a red face that matched his before grabbing the closest plushie to you and throwing it at his face, smacking him. “Turn around!!” You squealed and tried covering up as much as you could, but there wasn’t much you could do with a towel.

Hyunjin’s eyes widened as he snapped out of it, quickly turning his body around and squeezing his eyes shut.

“Shit… I’m so sorry holy fuck shit damn oh my god.” He cursed as embarrassment overcame him. ‘How long was I staring??? She probably thinks I’m a pervert now. Great!’ Hyunjin thought in his head, mentally losing it.

He heard rustling and shuffling of things behind him before you cleared your throat.

“Ahem.. You can turn around now.” You crossed your arms as Hyunjin turned to look at you with an embarrassed expression on his face.

“What did you need to say?” You got straight to the point and Hyunjin gulped nervously, mentally preparing himself for any possible outcome that may happen from this conversation.

“I’m… Sorry.”

“Is that seriously all you have to say?” You raised an eyebrow and scoffed in irritation.

“No! I mean, no. Sorry for raising my voice.” He licked his lips and took a deep breath in before exhaling.

“I’m so sorry for what happened today. I know I’ve already said it, but I truly am.” He started off apologetically. “I don’t know what came over me, I don’t know what possessed me to say those awful things to you. No words can describe the extent of my regret, I’ve never wished for anything more than to take back the words I said to you. They don’t reflect on what I feel about you at all, not even close.”

Your face softened a bit and you walked towards him, sitting down on the bed as you patted next to you, and he, almost instantly, sat down.

“I believe you. But It still hurt to hear those things, you know?”

“I know. I wish I didn’t hurt you. But fuck, it hurt so much to see you choose Heeseung over me for the second time. I cou—“

“Stop right there. The second time?” You looked at him in confusion, and he looked back.

“The first time was in high school?” He stated, or questioned. He stated it more so to ask if you were aware, but you stared at him, lost.

“…Huh?”

So you didn’t know. He was wrong all along. He doesn’t think this a lot, but this is one of the few times he was glad that he was wrong.

“Back in high school when we were together. I came in a little late for our daily meet up, and I saw you in the library with Heeseung.” Hyunjin clenched his fists at the memory, looking away so you wouldn’t be able to see his face.

“You two were whispering in each other’s ears, laughing. I wasn’t able to hear what you guys were talking about except for one thing. He asked you out on a date, and told you to keep it a secret from me and to make an excuse as to why you couldn’t hang out with me that day. Then he asked for your number, and you gave it to him. I left, because I didn’t want to hear any more. That’s when I started ignoring you. I started pushing you away because I was hurt. I didn’t want to talk to you because I knew that if we talked, I would have automatically forgiven you and I would've let you keep hurting me. I would've let you continue to cheat and I would've pretended to be oblivious to it because at least I got to have you in some way. So I ignored you to spare myself. I lacked the self-respect to confront you about it.” You heard Hyunjin sniff, so you gently grabbed his chin to make him face you, a singular tear running down his face.

He was crying.

You gave him a small, but sad smile. “I wish you would’ve told me, I would have explained everything. Hyunjin, we were talking about you. In a good way, of course. He was asking you what presents to get you for your surprise birthday party the following day. The “date” he asked me on was so we could look for gifts to give to you together. It was nothing like that, I promise you. I loved you too much back then to ever cheat. I wish you trusted me.” Your small smile slowly turned into a small frown instead and you cupped his cheek as he nodded.

“I was stupid. I still am. But fuck, Y/N. You were so perfect. You still are. It scared me. I didn’t deserve you, and I was so scared that you were finally realizing that you deserved more than what I could give you. You deserved better than me, and my insecurities got the best of me. Heeseung is just… so much better than me in so many aspects and I couldn’t help but assume the worst. Taller, smarter, more athletic, and fuck, I’m not even gay and I could tell that the motherfucker is beautiful.” He chuckled a little bit and you giggled at his last statement.

You opened your mouth to say something in disagreement, but Hyunjin beat you to it and held the hand, YOUR hand, that cupped his cheek. “I’m so sorry Y/N, I’m sorry for everything. Please forgive me, I’ll be better I promise. I’ll make it all up to you if you would give me another chance.” He cried as more and more tears bubbled out of his eyes and streamed down his perfect face, and your heart ached at the scene in front of you.

“Hyunjin…” You mumbled softly, but he didn’t seem to hear you through all his crying.

“I’m…in love with you Y/N. After all these years I’m still in love with you. I was.. I was in denial at first. I didn’t want to believe that after all this time, after all the effort I took to forget about you and move on, that it was all useless. But there's no denying it anymore. I love you. I want— no. I NEED you. I don’t want to lose you again.” Hyunjin got up from beside you, only to drop down to his knees in front of you, bringing your hands to his forehead.

“You don’t even have to love me back. I know you don’t. Just please…” He sobbed, “Please don’t leave me. I can handle us just being friends. I’m fine with that just please don’t leave me. I don’t want to live a life that you’re not in.” Hyunjin begged brokenly, looking up at you with pleading eyes, tears flowing endlessly.

You could feel yourself tearing up and your lips quivered as you knelt down to his level and hugged him.

“You fucking idiot. You’ll always be better than Heeseung in my eyes. You’re perfect to me. I’m not leaving you, not ever. I may not love you anymore, but you’re my friend. You have me, okay? Please stop crying, I hate seeing you like this. Honestly, I’ll still need time to fully accept your apology and forgive you, you were a real asshole today. But just know, I’ll forgive you eventually, and I’m not leaving.” You sniffled as he buried his face into your neck, attempting to stop.

“Thank you so much. I don’t deserve you, you’re an angel.” He whimpered and wrapped his arms around your waist.

You guys sat there for a while in each other’s embrace, and you waited until the cries died down to pull away and caress his cheek.

You stared into his bloodshot eyes, and he stared into yours. Even after crying his eyes out, you still thought he was the most beautiful man to exist. You offered Hyunjin a smile as he weakly smiled back.

“I’m getting sleepy, can I sleep now?” You giggled as his face turned red, immediately getting up.

“Shit, I'm sorry. I’ll get going now. Thank you for keeping me as a friend, I won’t ever hurt you ever again.” He took your hand and helped you get up before giving you one last hug.

“You don’t need to thank me for that, I want to keep you in my life too, silly. Now get going.”

You walked him out of the dorm room and waved goodbye, watching the silhouette of his figure grow smaller and smaller, until he was out of site.

What a day.

a/n: hi!!!! sorry for the slow update, i’ve been busier lately and i’ll be starting my senior year in college soon so i hope you guys understand 🥲 anyways.. i hope you guys liked this chapter! hyune got friendzoned lololol

𝜗𝜚 WTK series masterlist

TAGLIST (OPEN)! @jeonginplsholdmyhand @jeonginsgirl @mlrroh @mafiulaputaama @seungzsmin @hannie-bees @skz1lov @porang-poranglinos @sillyhal @mitchii @soulphoenix1618 @gnab-nahc @hyunjins-dimples @nappynapnaps @15092000volcano @livixcore @linocvp1d @yaorzu-blog @scallywag1299 @boo-ven9eance @lys4lix @kirbrary @4ln-stay8 @sellomaybe @aznstoner @saintcosette @starseungs @syedazarintasnim @elqivxstxr @ivydoesit23 @weirdowithaphone @hyuneee3 @nhyunn @velvetmoonlght @amarecerasus @skzstan12345 @ravengxbss @sweetbokji

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steddieas-shegoes · 11 months ago

Text

moments filled with everything

for @steddielovemonth prompt 'love is wanting to do everything together' AND for @starryeyedjanai's birthday! Happiest of birthdays to you! there's no spice this time, but i hope you enjoy anyway!

rated t | 1,369 words | cw: mention of injury/hospital | tags: soulmate au, getting together, love confessions

💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

The inconvenience of finding your soulmate when he’s on the run from the law and citizens of the town is pretty annoying. Especially when said soulmate insisted on trying to protect everyone and almost dies in the process.

The problem is that when you touch your soulmate for the first time, the connection becomes unbreakable, and the first few weeks are usually spent constantly touching in some way.

The problem is that they don’t have that option during the end of the world.

The problem is Eddie is under close watch of doctors and nurses, and Hopper, while they sort out his health and clearing his name, and that means Steve can only stop by during regular visiting hours.

The problem is that everyone else also only visits during normal visiting hours and they agreed not to tell anyone about their soulmate situation until he was home and safe.

Steve could feel the constant pull to touch him, to comfort him when the pain started to get to be too much. It was almost painful to have distance between them, but with the kids constantly fighting for Eddie’s attention, and Wayne sitting right next to him most days, Steve could barely get a quick brush of their hands.

They hadn’t even kissed yet.

It’s been 11 days since they touched. 11 days since Steve’s entire life became ‘get him out of this so you can love him.’

The loving him part was easy; only took a couple of days of watching him with the kids and with his uncle and with Robin for Steve to know he loved Eddie. But he wasn’t stupid, and he knew that Eddie probably didn’t feel the same yet. Why would he? He barely knew him, barely saw who he was outside of emergency mode.

And Eddie had made a passing comment right before he almost died, something Steve couldn’t quite get out of his head.

”A soulmate is someone you wanna do everything with, and I just don’t think I’ll get that.”

He didn’t know Steve could hear him, and probably wouldn’t have said it if he did, but if that’s how he felt after knowing Steve was his soulmate, then he didn’t think the love was going to be returned anytime soon, if ever. He could be patient. He was trying to be. But he wasn’t that hopeful.

Sometimes Eddie’s eyes would land on his across the hospital room, and they’d settle there for far longer than was considered normal for friends. They’d search Steve’s face for long enough that Steve could feel the warmth of a blush across his cheeks. He’d look away, but he’d feel Eddie’s gaze remain, sometimes for a few more seconds, sometimes more.

The pull got worse by the day.

By the two week mark, Steve was literally itching to be closer. He paced outside the door for ten minutes while he waited for Wayne to leave, grateful that the kids had all been brought up to volunteer at the school for the day and he would have at least a minute alone with Eddie without interruption.

Wayne opened the door and smirked at Steve. “Surprised you’ve been this patient. He’s about ready to pull out his IV in there, so you better hurry up and hold his hand or somethin’.”

Steve didn’t reply, just pushed through the door and rushed to Eddie’s bed.

Eddie was, in fact, picking at the tape around his IV, like if he was given enough alone time he would tear it off and escape out the window.

“I know I’m not what you wanted-” Steve started, his hands balled into fists to resist reaching out before Eddie was ready. “But I promise I’m gonna try to be what you need. I don’t know how to yet, but I want to. And I desperately need to touch you. Like, just holding your hand is fine, but I’m gonna lose my mind if I don’t so-”

“What do you mean you’re not what I wanted?” Eddie interrupted, casually sliding his hand into Steve’s. Both of them gasped at the spark, but the tension seemed to drain from both of them at the same time. “Why do you think that?”

“I mean, I’m sure I’m not really your type. And I mean, I know I’m not like I was in high school, but I let my friends do some shitty things to you then.” Steve looked down at their joined hands, perfectly fit together in a way he’d never had with anyone he’d been with before. “And I know you don’t think we’re a great match or whatever, but I think I’d like to do stuff with you all the time. If you’d want to.”

“Why do you think I think that?”

“Because you said you didn’t think you’d wanna do everything with your soulmate.”

Eddie seemed to realize what Steve was referring to as soon as Steve started to pull his hand away. His grip tightened and he shook his head.

“I didn’t mean that.” Eddie bit his lip. “I was scared that I would wanna do everything with you and you wouldn’t wanna do everything with me.”

“Eds, I love you. I wanna do everything with you, always.”

“You love me?” Eddie whispered.

Steve hadn’t meant to say it, but it’s not like he didn’t mean it, so he doubled down.

“Yeah. I do. I know it’s probably stupid, but I watched you give everything to protect us, I brought you back here almost dead, and ever since you woke up from surgery, I’ve watched you light up the room. I see how smart you are and how funny you are and how kind you are, even when you’re teasing someone. And I just. I love it. I love you.”

“Stevie-”

“I know you don’t love me. It’s okay. Maybe someday you will, maybe you won’t. Sometimes the soulmate shit is stupid, right? Fate gets it wrong or whatever.” Steve shrugged, tried to pull his hand free. He felt too vulnerable like this, standing by Eddie’s bed waiting for him to reject him. “But I just need you to know that fate got it right for me.”

“You don’t plan on following that up with a kiss?” Eddie finally asked after too long with just silence.

Steve’s mouth opened, closed, opened again as he tried to think of what to say or do.

“C’mere sweetheart. I think I owe you something,” Eddie smiled up at him as he tugged on his hand to get him closer.

Their first kiss was a lot like that first touch: overwhelming and scary, but electric and intense.

Filled with love.

When they broke apart, everything had shifted.

“I can’t wait to do everything with you, Stevie,” Eddie said before a knock on the door pulled them further apart.

Steve didn’t go far, just held his hand while the nurse looked over some of his bandages.

*****

When Eddie finally got out of the hospital, the first thing he did was tell everyone that Steve was his soulmate.

Wayne had already known, but went along with his dramatics because it’s what he was used to.

Robin had already known too after walking in on Steve sitting in Eddie’s lap, carefully braiding his hair while Eddie read to him. She didn’t even say anything, just sat down in the chair across from the bed and listened when Eddie started reading again.

After, she slapped Steve on the arm and told him to never hide shit from her again.

The kids took it well, though Mike and Dustin were pretty surprised they managed to hide it for so long.

Eddie still had a lot of healing to do.

But he did it with Steve by his side.

He did everything with Steve by his side.

When he made a sandwich, Steve was next to him, slicing the tomatoes.

When he was taking a shower, Steve was in it with him, or sitting on the toilet lid talking about his day.

When he was folding laundry, Steve was using dish detergent to get oil stains out of his jeans.

Every day was filled with moments together, and each moment was everything.

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #steddielovemonth #love is wanting to do everything together #getting together #love confessions #soulmate au

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silly-of-the-str1ng · 1 month ago

Text

Dream come True?

A/N: ughhh i love this one, very silly and sweet Billie, direct continuation of the first part- psst go read that first to understand the story! anyways enjoy babes 😘

NOT proof read, may have some weird sentences here and there and untrue information!!

warnings: none

word count: 1.5k

summary: Billie makes you sorta 100% jello during her show

“Wait, wait, what happened? Did you get the tickets?!” Amber’s voice was high-pitched with excitement as soon as she answered, cutting through the panic-stricken rush of words spilling out of your mouth.

“Amber, you won’t believe me, but-” you paused, heart still hammering in your chest, trying to make sense of the unreal situation that had just unfolded in front of you, “Billie Eilish... was just in my mom’s bakery. Like, she was right there, sitting down, talking to me…”

“Wait, hold on,” Amber cut in, her tone now serious with disbelief, “Did you just say Billie Eilish was in your bakery?”

“Yes!” You could barely contain the excitement in your voice, your hands shaking as you paced around the empty bakery. "I was just making croissants, and she walks in like it's no big deal, like she's just another person. I didn’t even recognize her at first, and then I thought, ‘No way,’ but—then it was really her!”

Amber let out a loud gasp on the other end of the phone. “Wait, did you talk to her?! Did she get pastries?”

“Yeah, I told her the pastries weren’t ready yet, and she sat down and... we talked. And then—get this—she offered me tickets to her show. Like, VIP tickets. She said she'd get me up front. And I almost said no!” You couldn’t help but laugh at the absurdity of it now. “I was going to turn her down because I thought it was too much, but then I just—she was serious. She’s so... chill. And then she left, and I didn't even get a picture or anything—”

“Oh my god, wait.” Amber’s voice was a mix of awe and jealousy. “Are you telling me that you almost didn’t take the tickets? What’s wrong with you, are you trying to lose your mind?! You know how rare that is, right? Billie Eilish just offered you VIP tickets, front row, probably on the house, and you didn’t snap a picture?! I would’ve died, Y/N! DIED! You could've been in the same room with her! You could've had an actual conversation and—”

“I was in shock!” you shot back, pacing faster now, trying to organize your thoughts. “I didn’t even know what to say to her! It was Billie Eilish, Amber. She’s a literal goddess. And I was standing there like an idiot with flour all over my hands, trying to act normal.”

Amber was quiet for a second, clearly processing what you had just told her. Then she sighed, her voice much softer now. “Okay, well, it sounds like you really had a moment, Y/N. I mean, she must’ve liked you if she’s offering you that kind of access. I think she saw how genuine you were. That’s not something everyone gets to experience.”

You paused, leaning against the counter, letting Amber’s words sink in. She was right. Billie didn’t have to do that. She could’ve easily gone to any other bakery, or at least pretended to be too busy or too famous to care. But she didn’t. She was real. And she seemed to see you as just another person in the crowd, not a screaming fan who would lose their mind over the chance to meet her.

“I think... I think I'm still in shock,” you muttered.

“Well, you should be!” Amber laughed. “But seriously, Y/N, you have to go now. You can’t just let that opportunity slip away.”

“Of course I’m going,” you replied quickly. “I mean... how could I not?”

“And when you meet her again,” Amber said, almost with a warning tone, “You better have a good outfit. You cannot look like you just rolled out of bed again.”

“Okay, okay. I’ll figure it out,” you said, already thinking about what you’d wear. “I can't believe this is real. She... she liked my bakery, Amber. She said she might come back. What if she actually does?”

“Then you're gonna need to be ready,” Amber said with a laugh. “Just make sure you don’t fall apart when you see her again, okay?”

“I won’t, I won’t. I swear,” you muttered, your heart still racing, but now it was a different kind of racing. A kind of exhilaration that only came from knowing you had just crossed paths with someone you'd only ever dreamed of meeting.

“And for the record,” Amber added with a smirk in her voice, “You have to tell me everything—EVERYTHING—that happens at the show. Don’t leave a single detail out.”

“I won’t,” you promised, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness bubbling inside you. “This is going to be insane.”

---

The day of the concert finally arrived, and you could hardly focus at work. It had been a blur of checking the time and watching the clock tick closer and closer to the moment when you’d finally be standing in front of Billie Eilish, at one of her sold-out shows, no longer just a fan on the outside, but someone she had actually invited.

When the time came, you found yourself standing at the entrance of the venue, security scanning your pass with an eyebrow raised at the VIP badge that had your name on it. They nodded you through without question. Your heart thumped against your ribcage as you walked through the corridors, past all the other fans who were waiting for the doors to open, and you found yourself at the front, where the stage was. And there, standing beside it—was Billie. She was chatting with the crew, her black hair falling in soft waves around her face, dressed in the kind of casual outfit that still made her look like she had stepped out of a magazine.

Your breath caught in your throat as she spotted you, a playful smirk tugging at the corner of her lips.

“Y/N you came!” she smiled as she walked up to you and pulled you in for a warm hug, many your breath hitch involuntarily.

You stood there for a moment, frozen in shock, as Billie Eilish—your idol, the very person who had left you speechless in your mom’s bakery wrapped her arms around you.

Her embrace was warm, genuine, as if she hadn't just turned the world upside down by offering you VIP tickets. She smelled faintly of something sweet but rich, like coffee and vanilla, and for a second, you couldn't believe this was real.

“I—uh—yeah!” you stammered, trying to play it cool but knowing you were failing miserably. “I, uh, can’t believe this is actually happening.”

Billie laughed, a low, melodic sound that made your heart skip. “I can’t believe you almost didn’t take the tickets. You’re fucking crazy. But I’m glad you did. It’s good to see you again.”

You felt like you were on another planet, standing beside her, watching her move so effortlessly between the fans and the crew like she wasn’t a global superstar. “I—um—wow, you look amazing,” you managed to say, the words almost tripping over themselves in your mind before they came out.

Billie was in a dark blue jersey with the number “80” in big bold letters on the front- she had her iconic glasses on and her baggy shorts as usual- but fuck it didn't make it any less hot to see it in person.

Billie gave you a playful wink. “You too, though. You’ve got that whole ‘I like concerts a little too much’ vibe going for you. I dig it.”

The compliment made your face flush, looking down at your own merch, your cheeks naturally coming more red as you met Billie’s pale blue eyes. “Thanks. I, uh… I didn’t really have money to buy any new merch so, I got some of my old stuff,” you said, motioning to your outfit, her “Happier than ever” album image plastered on the black shirt and ripped jeans mixed with a few rings and your dangling star earrings. You’d hoped it looked casually stylish enough, but compared to the crowd around you, you felt like an awkward fish out of water.

“You look great,” Billie reassured you.

You tried to ignore the heat buzzing in your chest as she turned and ran away, probably having to get ready for the show, and you didn't mind, you were finally able to feel what it was like to be at a real, huge concert. As the lights dimmed the arena erupted with cheers as Billie popped up on stage, people were screaming in your ears the whole time but you didn't care, all you could do was watch Billie as she danced across the stage without a care in the damn world.

The show went on for a while before the song Billie had been featured on, starting playing- one of your favorites… Guess.

Billie jumped out onto the stage again, the song playing as she sang, everything felt absolutely perfect, the lights, the bass of the arena that made you feel your damn insides moving, everything.

Then? Billie looked straight at you, smiling slyly as she sung the best part of the song-

I wanna

Try it, bite it, lick it, spit it

pull it to the side and get all up in it

kiss it, bite it, can i fit it?

Charli likes boys but she knows I'd hit it.

god damn, you would've combusted right then and there when she added on that little

Charli call me if your with it

mouthing your name instead of Charli’s when singing the line.

god damnit.

#billie eilish #billie #fanfic #billie eilish fanfic #fem reader #part 2

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jinnieboosworld · 1 month ago

Text

The Nurse

Hyunjae x Female Reader

@deoboyznet @a-dream-bookmark @k-labels

Genre: RomCom, Fluff

Summary: While ice skating Lee Jaehyun slips and sprains his wrist. After being transported to the hospital he meets a nurse. A very pretty nurse.

Part of The MeetCute Series

Word Count: 3302

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

Hyunjae had no idea how he’d been roped into this.

“It’s the holidays!” Sangyeon had said with that big, hopeful grin. “You’ve got to do something festive, Hyunjae!”

“Yeah,” Changmin had added with a teasing smirk. “Sitting at home binge-watching dramas does not count as festive.”

Chanhee, the practical one of the group, had already booked the tickets. “We’re going ice skating. It’ll be fun. And if you break something, it’s your fault for being clumsy.”

And that’s how Hyunjae found himself wobbling across the ice, his arms flailing like a newborn deer.

“Guys,” he called out, voice wavering. “I think I’m getting the hang of this!”

“No, you’re not!” Sangyeon shouted back, laughing as he effortlessly glided past him.

“Try not to die!” Changmin added, doing a playful spin.

Chanhee, skating backward like a show-off, raised a skeptical eyebrow. “I give him five more minutes.”

Hyunjae grumbled, determined to prove them wrong. He pushed off harder, his confidence soaring as he actually managed to move without tripping over his own feet. But then, out of nowhere, a tiny child zoomed past him at lightning speed, causing him to panic and lose his balance.

Before he could fully process what was happening, his skates slipped out from under him. He flailed wildly, arms reaching for anything to stop his fall, but gravity had other plans.

“Hyunjae, no!” Sangyeon yelled, reaching out too late.

With an ungraceful thud, Hyunjae hit the ice. His right hand took the brunt of the impact, and pain shot through his wrist like a lightning bolt.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

“I told you this would happen,” Chanhee muttered as they sat in the waiting room of the hospital’s urgent care center.

Hyunjae cradled his wrist, trying to look less miserable than he felt. “I think it’s just a sprain.”

“Let’s hope so,” Sangyeon said, patting his shoulder. “You’re too young to be this accident-prone.”

“Not to mention, this is so embarrassing,” Changmin chimed in with a grin. “Who gets injured doing holiday activities? It’s literally the most wholesome thing ever.”

Hyunjae was about to retort when a nurse entered the room, clipboard in hand. “Lee Jaehyun?”

The voice caught him off guard—not because of what it said, but how it sounded. Soft, clear, and with a hint of amusement. He looked up to see a young woman in scrubs standing by the doorway, her name tag reading Y/N L/N.

For a moment, Hyunjae forgot about the pain in his wrist.

“Come on,” Y/N said with a small smile, motioning for him to follow. “Let’s take a look at that wrist of yours.”

“Go on, lover boy,” Chanhee whispered, earning a glare from Hyunjae.

He stood up, cheeks flushing slightly, and followed Y/N into the exam room.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

“So,” Y/N began as she carefully unwrapped the makeshift ice pack from Hyunjae’s wrist, “how did this happen?”

“Ice skating,” Hyunjae said sheepishly. “Turns out, I’m not very good at it.”

Y/N chuckled, the sound making his heart skip a beat. “You’re not the first, trust me. We get a lot of skating injuries around this time of year.”

She examined his wrist with gentle hands, her touch light but precise. Hyunjae tried not to wince too much, though it was hard to focus on the pain when she was standing so close.

“It’s swollen,” Y/N noted, grabbing a small flashlight to check for bruising. “But I don’t think it’s broken. We’ll get an X-ray just to be sure.”

“Cool, cool,” Hyunjae said, trying to sound nonchalant. “You, uh, do this a lot?”

Y/N glanced at him, her expression amused. “Take care of patients? Yeah, that’s kind of my job.”

“No, I mean…” Hyunjae trailed off, realizing how dumb he sounded. “Never mind.”

Y/N smirked but didn’t push him to explain. Instead, she finished her initial assessment and handed him a form to fill out while they waited for the X-ray technician.

“Someone will come get you in a few minutes,” she said, turning to leave.

“Wait,” Hyunjae blurted out before he could stop himself. “Are you—uh—are you working tomorrow? I mean, if I have to come back or something…”

Y/N raised an eyebrow, clearly biting back a smile. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get there. For now, focus on not falling again.”

And with that, she walked out of the room, leaving Hyunjae staring after her like an idiot.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

When Hyunjae returned to his friends in the waiting area, they were all grinning like they knew something he didn’t.

“So?” Sangyeon asked. “How’s the wrist?”

“It’s fine,” Hyunjae mumbled, sinking into his chair. “Probably just a sprain.”

“And how’s Nurse Y/N?” Changmin teased, waggling his eyebrows.

Hyunjae shot him a glare. “She’s professional. And nice. That’s it.”

“Sure, sure,” Chanhee said, smirking. “But did you notice how hot she is?”

Hyunjae groaned, covering his face with his good hand. “You guys are the worst.”

Sangyeon laughed, clapping him on the back. “Hey, at least you got something good out of this disaster.”

Hyunjae rolled his eyes, but as his friends kept teasing him, he couldn’t help but think about Y/N’s smile. Maybe they weren’t entirely wrong.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

Hyunjae spent the rest of the evening nursing his pride almost as much as his wrist. The X-rays confirmed it was just a sprain, but that didn’t stop his friends from teasing him relentlessly.

“You should’ve seen yourself,” Chanhee said, doubling over with laughter as they sat around Sangyeon’s living room. “You looked like a baby deer on ice.”

“Very festive, though,” Changmin added, grinning. “Like a reindeer. Just, you know, clumsier.”

Hyunjae rolled his eyes, throwing a pillow in their general direction. “You guys are the worst.”

“I don’t know,” Sangyeon said with a sly smile. “That nurse seemed to think you were pretty charming.”

That got their attention.

“She was just doing her job,” Hyunjae said quickly, but his ears turned pink, betraying him.

“Oh, come on,” Chanhee said, narrowing his eyes. “You were totally into her.”

“Guys,” Hyunjae groaned, leaning back on the couch. “Drop it.”

But even as they moved on to other topics, Hyunjae couldn’t stop thinking about Y/N. Her easy smile, the way her eyes crinkled slightly when she laughed, the calm confidence in her movements as she took care of him.

Yeah, he was screwed.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

Two days later, Hyunjae found himself back at the hospital for a follow-up appointment.

“You’re back!” Y/N said as she walked into the room, clipboard in hand. She looked surprised but not displeased to see him.

“Yeah,” Hyunjae said, his heart doing a weird little flip. “Apparently, I’m supposed to be ‘monitored for improvement.’ Or something.”

Y/N chuckled, setting her clipboard down. “Let me guess. Dr. Kim’s orders?”

He nodded. “She’s thorough.”

“She is,” Y/N agreed. “But don’t worry. I’ll make this quick and painless.”

She gently took his wrist, checking the swelling and testing his range of motion. Hyunjae tried to focus on anything but the way her touch sent a jolt of electricity up his arm.

“You’re healing well,” Y/N said, scribbling something down on her clipboard. “Just keep icing it and avoid any more skating adventures.”

“No promises,” Hyunjae said, grinning.

Y/N raised an eyebrow. “I mean it. If you end up back here, I might have to charge you for wasting my time.”

“Harsh,” Hyunjae said, feigning a wounded expression. “And here I thought we were becoming friends.”

Y/N laughed softly. “You’re charming, I’ll give you that. But I think you might be a little too clumsy to keep up with me.”

“Ouch,” Hyunjae said, placing a hand over his heart. “That’s cold, Nurse Y/N.”

She shrugged, a playful smile tugging at her lips. “Just calling it like I see it.”

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

Over the next couple of weeks, Hyunjae found excuses to drop by the hospital more often than strictly necessary.

“Hey, I just wanted to double-check that I’m doing this wrist exercise thing right,” he said one day, even though Dr. Kim had already explained it to him in excruciating detail.

Y/N gave him a knowing look but didn’t call him out on it. “Let’s see.”

Another time, he showed up with a box of chocolates. “Just a little thank-you gift for taking such good care of me.”

“Bribery,” Y/N said, shaking her head but accepting the chocolates anyway.

His friends noticed, of course.

“Are you serious?” Sangyeon asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’re pretending to need medical advice just to see her?”

“Desperate,” Chanhee said, smirking.

“I think it’s kind of romantic,” Changmin chimed in.

“It’s not like that,” Hyunjae protested, but the pink tint to his ears gave him away.

Sure, he could argue that he was just being friendly, but deep down, he knew the truth. He wanted to see Y/N. He wanted to make her laugh, to hear her teasing remarks, to see if maybe—just maybe—she felt the same spark he did.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

One day, as Hyunjae sat in the waiting room, fiddling with his phone, he overheard Y/N talking to a colleague.

“So, how’s that guy who keeps coming in with the sprained wrist?” the colleague asked, her voice amused.

“He’s harmless,” Y/N said, laughing softly. “Honestly, it’s kind of cute how much effort he’s putting in.”

Hyunjae froze, his heart pounding. Cute?

He couldn’t decide if he was embarrassed or thrilled. Maybe a little of both.

When Y/N came out to greet him, her expression was as professional as ever, but he thought he caught a flicker of warmth in her eyes.

“Back again?” she said, crossing her arms.

“What can I say?” Hyunjae said, flashing her his best smile. “I can’t stay away.”

For the first time, Y/N looked a little flustered. It was brief—a blink-and-you’d-miss-it moment—but it was enough to give Hyunjae hope.

Maybe he wasn’t as hopeless as his friends thought.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

Hyunjae didn’t think it was possible to spend so much time debating with himself over six words.

“Will you go out with me?”

It seemed so simple when Sangyeon suggested it—“Just ask her! What’s the worst that could happen?”—but now, sitting in the hospital parking lot with his sprained wrist officially healed, Hyunjae felt like a nervous wreck. He’d already seen Y/N twice this week for follow-ups, and each time, he left more smitten than before.

The idea of asking her out was terrifying, yet there was a voice in the back of his head urging him on. His mom’s words, casually spoken over the phone the night before, echoed in his mind.

“She sounds like a nice girl,” his mom had said after he told her about Y/N. “I think you two would make a cute couple.”

Cute couple. Sure. If he ever managed to string a sentence together in front of her that didn’t sound like a middle school crush.

Finally, with a deep breath, Hyunjae got out of his car and headed inside.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

Y/N was at the station when he walked in, typing something on her tablet. She looked up as he approached, her eyes lighting up the way they always did when she saw him.

“Hyunjae,” she said with a warm smile. “Back again?”

“Hey, Nurse Y/N,” he greeted, his hands stuffed into his jacket pockets. “You’ll miss me when I stop showing up.”

Y/N laughed softly. “You’re assuming I don’t already.”

Her words caught him off guard, and he blinked. Was she teasing? He couldn’t tell.

“I was actually hoping to talk to you,” Hyunjae said, shifting his weight nervously.

Y/N tilted her head, her smile still in place. “Sure. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine,” Hyunjae said quickly. “Better than fine, actually. My wrist is all good, so I won’t need any more appointments.”

“That’s great!” Y/N said, genuinely happy for him. “You must be relieved.”

“I am,” Hyunjae said, then hesitated. Now or never. “But, uh, I was wondering if—well, if you’d maybe want to go out with me sometime?”

Y/N blinked, clearly caught off guard. For a moment, Hyunjae thought he’d made a huge mistake. But then, a slow, surprised smile spread across her face.

“Are you asking me on a date, Hyunjae?”

“I am,” he said, his voice steady despite the butterflies in his chest. “Unless you’re about to tell me it’s against hospital policy.”

Y/N laughed. “No, it’s not against policy. But you know I’m going to hold you to ridiculously high standards, right? I don’t just go out with anyone.”

“That’s fair,” Hyunjae said, grinning. “I’ll do my best not to embarrass myself.”

Y/N looked at him for a moment, as if deciding something. Then she nodded. “Okay. You’ve got yourself a date.”

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

The following weekend, Hyunjae waited outside a small café, trying not to look as nervous as he felt. When Y/N arrived, wearing a casual yet effortlessly stylish outfit, he realized he had absolutely no chance of playing it cool.

“Hi,” she said with a smile, her cheeks slightly pink.

“Hey,” Hyunjae said, opening the door for her. “You look amazing.”

“Thanks,” Y/N said, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. “You clean up pretty well yourself.”

The café was warm and cozy, with soft music playing in the background. They ordered coffee and pastries, then sat near the window, the conversation flowing easily.

Hyunjae learned that Y/N had always wanted to be a nurse, even as a kid, and that she loved cheesy rom-coms as much as he did, though she claimed she only watched them ironically.

“You’re not fooling me,” Hyunjae said, leaning back in his chair. “You totally cried during The Notebook.”

“First of all,” Y/N said, pointing her fork at him, “everyone cries during The Notebook. Second, if you tell anyone, I’ll deny it.”

Hyunjae laughed, feeling more at ease than he had in ages. Y/N had a way of making him feel like he could just be himself, no pretenses or bravado.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

Hyunjae had always been good at overthinking. It was practically a skill at this point, honed from years of imagining worst-case scenarios and planning for disasters that never came. But as he stood outside Y/N’s apartment building, bouquet in hand, he realized that this time, he wasn’t nervous.

For once, his mind was clear.

The past few weeks had been nothing short of amazing. Each date with Y/N felt like peeling back another layer, discovering something new and wonderful about her. And the best part? She seemed to feel the same way about him.

“Relax, man,” Sangyeon had told him that morning over coffee. “Just tell her how you feel. She already likes you. What’s the worst that could happen?”

For once, Hyunjae actually believed him.

He knocked on Y/N’s door, the bouquet shaking slightly in his hand. When the door opened, Y/N stood there, her usual smile lighting up her face. She was wearing a casual dress that made her look effortlessly beautiful, and Hyunjae couldn’t help but stare for a second too long.

“Hey,” she said, her tone playful. “Were you planning to just stand there all night?”

Hyunjae blinked, snapping out of his trance. “Sorry. You look…amazing.”

“Thanks,” Y/N said, stepping aside to let him in. Her eyes fell on the flowers in his hand. “Are those for me?”

“Yeah,” Hyunjae said, handing them to her. “I figured you deserved something as pretty as you.”

Y/N laughed, rolling her eyes but clearly pleased. “Cheesy, but I’ll take it. Let me put these in some water.”

As she disappeared into the kitchen, Hyunjae sat on the couch, his heart pounding in a way that was both exhilarating and terrifying. This was it. The moment he’d been waiting for.

When Y/N returned, she sat down beside him, her expression soft. “You okay? You seem…different today.”

Hyunjae took a deep breath, turning to face her. “I wanted to talk to you about something.”

Y/N’s smile faltered slightly, her brows knitting together. “Okay. What’s up?”

“I’ve been thinking a lot about us,” he began, his voice steady despite the nerves bubbling in his chest. “And I realized something. Every time I see you, it feels like the best part of my day. You make me laugh, you make me feel comfortable, and…you make me want to be better. I guess what I’m trying to say is…I like you. A lot.”

Y/N’s eyes widened, her lips parting as if she were about to speak, but Hyunjae held up a hand.

“Wait, let me finish,” he said, his cheeks flushing. “I know this might be a little fast, and if you’re not ready, that’s totally fine. But I think my mom was right.”

Y/N blinked. “Your mom?”

Hyunjae nodded, a small smile tugging at his lips. “She said we’d make a cute couple. And now, standing here, I think she was right.”

Y/N stared at him for a moment, her expression unreadable. Then, slowly, a smile spread across her face.

“Your mom sounds pretty wise,” she said softly.

Hyunjae chuckled, relief washing over him. “She is. But I’m starting to think you’re even wiser.”

Y/N shook her head, laughing lightly. “You’re such a dork.”

“Maybe,” Hyunjae admitted, grinning. “But I’m your dork. If you’ll have me.”

Y/N didn’t answer with words. Instead, she leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek, her hand lingering on his shoulder.

“I guess I can live with that,” she said, her voice teasing but her eyes warm.

Hyunjae felt his heart soar, his grin widening as he leaned back, finally letting himself relax. For the first time in what felt like forever, everything felt right.

And as they sat there, the world outside fading away, Hyunjae couldn’t help but think that this was just the beginning of something truly special.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

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valkyrie1435atla · 4 months ago

Text

@hannahhook7744 this was going to be another reply but it started getting too long, so here’s a bit of an explanation on Zuko’s situation.

I can’t always know if what I’m trying to portray in my comic gets across how I want it to, that’s a drawback of the comic format, I’m generally not able to include long, detailed paragraphs unless it’s in a format that makes sense in the context of the comic. (Yishengs Logbook for example.)

-SPOILERS(?) FOR PARTS 14, 17. OR NOT REALLY SPOILERS, JUST PLAIN EXPLANATIONS OF WHAT HAPPENED TO CLEAR ANY CONFUSION-

in Mortem Obire, we see a play-by-play of Zuko’s death and his time traveling from his own perspective, in his head. ‘Mortem Obire’ means ‘to face death,’ this is Zuko processing what happened to him. Azula’s lightning struck him, pain, blinding pain, and then it all stopped, and he was back on his ship. He is still reeling, though, every sensation is suddenly opposite, “it was loud, and it was burning-“ in a millisecond his whole world flipped upside down. “And suddenly it was quiet, and I was cold” Zuko is so disoriented from the switch he immediately collapses, slams head-first on the hard ship deck, and is sent back to the future. “And it was loud again, and I was burning again” He becomes stuck in this sort of in-between state, like a light switch you’re trying to balance in the middle, flickering on and off. “Someone called my name” Katara calls his name, Iroh calls his name. “I saw a pillar of light in the sky-I saw a comets trail in the sky” he sees both. “You ran to me” Katara ran to him, Iroh ran to him.

Iroh was holding him; he laid alone, bleeding out.

Iroh pulled him away, Zuko began to lose consciousness; he burned while watching Azula kill Katara.

He laid there in his dead, rotting body; he laid in a body that wasn’t his.

It all happens in Zukos head, though. In the present moment Iroh just asked him, “and then?” Zuko replies, “and then…” (Part 13) then falls silent for about 30 seconds. Iroh just stares at him, waiting for an answer. The flashback plays in Zukos mind, he starts to tremble and hyperventilate, Iroh calls out his name but Zuko cannot hear him. “Prince Zuko, can you hear me?!” The flashback ends and Zuko is pulled back to the present. etc. etc.

A Thankless Job is YiShengs (and partially Iroh’s) perspective of Zuko’s death and time traveling. (Obviously they don’t know that he died, they don’t know that he time traveled.) season one Zuko collapsed suddenly and for literally no reason at all, (they didn’t see the beam of light, there was no beam of light.) YiSheng and Iroh took him to his room, and he started seizing (“A seizure is abnormal electrical activity in [the] brain” (the Cleveland Clinic)). He was sort of awake for a few seconds at a time, YiSheng medicated him in a moment he could actually swallow, and then Zuko passed out completely. Iroh stayed by his side. It is important to note that there was no injury at first, and Zuko woke up a few hours later. Parts three, four, and five happen, Zuko has a brief conversation with Iroh, he still isn’t completely aware of the time travel, everything is very hazy. Iroh leaves, and the haze begins to clear. The lightning creeps back in, the scar starts to reappear on his chest and it grows and it burns and Zuko is burning burning fire fire I am melting from the inside I am dying. etc. etc.

In the revised version I am currently working on, remaking the first chunk of the story so far, these details (and many more) will all be displayed much more clearly. We will see Iroh’s complete perspective of the collapse first, followed by Zuko’s and Yisheng’s as has already been written. A short interlude of Jee’s perspective next?

Basically, Zukos injury carried over because he didn’t stay in the past when he first got blasted there. Everyone else in the gaang flipped once and that was that, the injuries that killed them stayed with the past timeline. Zuko’s did not. Just his luck, really.

#atla #if this is a dream au #avatar the last airbender #original comic #fan comic #if this is a dream don’t wake me #support artists #explanation #sort of spoilers?

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plague-karm · 9 days ago

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Sonic 3 Spoiler Post Wheyyyyy

I’m gonna talk about literally everything so if you still haven’t seen the movie then scroll away, I will be adding images a week after this post goes up as well so yeah. This is NOT going to be well thought out at all it’s just going to be a ramble fest because why not shejsjjejejs

The fact that they made Live And Learn a song Maria wrote gives it SO much more meaning and a reason for the song to be included in the movie (besides fanservice lmao), a story line centred around the process of grief culminating with a grandiose reprise of a song made by the person one of the characters is grieving? CINEMA

The third act was incredible of course but god I wish they stopped going back and forth with the Robotnik stuff, the switch ups between the immaculate fight choreography and the slapstick bullshit really began to run its course and I was just waiting for peak to start again

Speaking of those fight scenes OH MY GOD THE FIGHT CHOREOGRAPHY IS SOME OF THE BEST THIS SERIES HAS EVER HAD IT WAS ON SOME DRAGON BALL TYPE SHIT. When Super Sonic and Super Shadow were beating the everloving fuck out of each other in different countries I was stimming like crazy

Knuckles is the unsung MVP of this movie and I’m so happy they got to show his character development in a really natural way, he’s really become a big brother figure for the other two and the way he tried to talk Sonic down after Tom almost died really got to me he’s come so far 🥹

When the trailer fakeout shot came up I was LOSING IT 😭

Also I want to know what the cinematographer was smoking because some of the shots in this thing are BEAUTIFUL, especially the ones in space (when Sonic and Shadow enter their super forms and go around like blazing comets I was going crazy)

The colour grading is a huge step up from the last two movies as well, you can tell the budget went up because the models here are stunning (especially Shadow’s)

I wish Live And Learn got to play a little longer but I’m just happy they included it either way (when the vocals came in so did I)

Agent Stone continues to be one of my favourite human characters in the entire series, I honestly wouldn’t mind them adding him to the games because his dynamic with Eggman is way better than whatever Orbot and Cubot have going on

They definitely listened to the critiques for the second movie as well because the human stuff has been very toned down and I honestly think it’s for the better (and this is coming from someone who actually really likes Rachel idk man she’s just fun)

I’m pretty satisfied with how they handled Gerald outside of the usual Jim Carrey shenanigans, portraying him as a madman so consumed by grief that he’s completely willing to let Earth and himself die out of pure spite was crazy, I saw someone say that this is how he’d act if he didn’t get executed 50 years ago and I can see that pretty clearly. I loved the glimpses of humanity we get of him as well (the way he referred to both Maria AND Shadow as “kids” in the flashback made me feel like he genuinely did care for him at that point and the death of Maria just threw him off the deep end)

The scene of Shadow and Gerald finding Maria’s body was DEVASTATING, the way Shadow didn’t know if she was dead at first and all it took was to see how heartbroken Gerald was to figure it out killed me 😔

Speaking of which they actually did a rewrite for Shadow’s backstory while keeping a lot of the same elements and I’m pretty happy with it for the most part, him coming to earth in a comet is black arms foreshadowing 100% and the flashbacks of him and Maria just hanging out and having fun like normal kids was really nice (the inclusion of the biolizard being the monster in the movie they were watching was really cool too I didn’t even notice that at first until someone pointed it out)

Despite these changes he was handled SO well, Keanu did a great job voicing him and to hear that he actually wanted to play the character made me so happy, it’s almost like getting people who give a shit about the source material is a really important factor of making adaptations succeed idk

The reason why Maria’s around though is kind of weak? She isn’t ill in this version and the only reason she’s in the lab is because Gerald takes her everywhere? That’s it? Why couldn’t they have said that he adopted her or something? (Or maybe her parents had an incurable illness that Gerald tried and failed to help with so he took her in after the fact idk)

Ben Schwartz popped OFF in the third act god I love it watching whimsical characters completely losing their shit after they’ve been pushed too far

The fact that the iconic “announcement” was changed to a tragic yaoi send off is beautiful, I hope Agent Stone comes back in future movies his dynamic with Tails was really cute

Pansexual Eggman is now canon we are so back

Loved the brief snippet of E.G.G.M.A.N, it played for five seconds but I was stimming anyway

The soundtrack is also a huge step up from the first two movies as well (also Throw It All Away is one of the song titles holy shit)

The post credits scene was PEAK I love Metal Sonic and Amy’s designs so much, Im really interested to see if it’ll be a loose adaptation of Sonic CD or it’ll be its own thing (maybe Amy and Metal are originally from the games’ bad timeline and that’s how Silver shows up later? I’m not sure, I just want Silver fans to get SOMETHING they’ve been fucking starving bro I feel bad for them 😭)

#karm rambles #sonic 3 movie #sonic 3 spoilers #shadow the hedgehog #knuckles the echidna #tails the fox #dr eggman #gerald robotnik #maria robotnik

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mumms-the-word · 1 month ago

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Yet another Veilguard update with the usual good, the bad, the ugly, and the me freaking out about minor references and callbacks haha

This one is very long sorry

So since the last update I have done as much side content as possible before heading to the Hossberg Wetlands and later Weisshaupt (which I just completed last night) which included, briefly, unlocking all of the solas regrets murals

And uh WOW was that whole deep dive a doozy. I definitely should have spaced out the murals over time rather than movie-marathoned them back to back. But the things I learned about Solas…it’s insanity

In a good way

In a really horrifying way

I loved that our theories about Solas being a spirit of Wisdom first were confirmed, and I lost my mind over the fact that the first elves were spirits who gained physical bodies by taking Titan blood (aka lyrium). And the fact that Solas CREATED THE BLIGHT by essentially making the Titans Tranquil?? And that’s why Dwarves don’t dream????

Losing my mind. Solas what have you DONE.

I still ahev to process it all haha but I do have a few thoughts

So far, I wish there was more engagement with these elements and the Chant of Light. The companions react and say that these reveals basically dismantle Andrastianism but the Chant has several allegorical parallels to what, apparently, really happened. The Maker’s first children were spirits, and all that…so I kind of wish the Chantry had a bigger presence in the game with more reactivity

But that’s a post for another day. For now, I reloaded back to only 3 murals unlocked so the team only knows the story up to Solas creating the Veil. I’ll rewatch the others later.

I got worried about being locked out of stuff so I went ahead and did as much side content as I could with a couple of exceptions. Turns out, I probably didn’t need to do that and it would have made more sense narratively if I hadn’t. More on that in a minute

The Siege of Weisshaupt mission was SO GOOD!! Like…the main missions are really where this game shines, I think. I have gripes with some of the companion conversations, but in the actual story missions, the action, the intensity, all of it is so good. And I thought Ghilan’nain turning her archdemon into a many-headed hydra creature was *chefs kiss* so cool. I love fighting big/unique stuff like that!

All that said the follow up scene with the team at the table leaves…a lot to be desired

Listen, DA games pride themselves on bringing together a team of companions that players adore and fall in love with. Naturally we enjoy helping out our companions because we like them. We don’t have to be told to help them because we just generally do that…and if we don’t then, rip, suffer the consequences

So I got a bit annoyed when the scene suddenly turned to a very overt “fix our problems” narrative

I don’t know, that feels so…forced to me. Varric literally tells me I have to solve everyone’s problems. Which is like…I was going to! Because they’re my friends! But being straight up told like “hey you have to solve everyone’s problems and stop their distractions or this team isn’t going to function” is like…I’m sorry are we adults or aren’t we? Why am I being told to babysit the team? Can you guys not pursue these distractions on your own rather than wait for me to give you permission? Did we all forget that two gods are out there rampaging? That they’re strong enough to destroy a fortress that stood against the blight and various conflicts for over 900 years? That they haven’t stopped and show no signs of stopping anytime soon?

But no, by all means, tell me in very obvious terms that my job is now to reconcile all your differences before I face the gods again. That doesn’t feel very handed at all.

Let me be clear. I love to help my companion. I love the idea that you build a team that works well because you have shaped them via your leadership skills. I love the idea that your team works well because you have invested in them. That’s really the heart of any DA game—gather your team, earn their loyalty, and see how well the friends you’ve made along the way assist you in the big battles to come.

But…that scene around the kitchen table could have been so much better, so much more nuanced, and far less “Solve their problems.”

To me, that scene should have been everyone fighting, calling out everyone’s distractions and mistakes, and essentially devolving into outright arguments over the table until Rook yells at everyone to shut up. Everyone is mad, everyone is upset. And then maybe the companions are like “sorry Rook, listen, I have a lot on my mind. I’m still going to help with the Big Problem but I’m also going to pursue this Other Thing whether you like it or not.” No suggestion that it’s now your problem to solve, but a heavy hint that it might get done more quickly if you help (which also gives you room to be an ass and not help). In this scenario, everyone ends up being very disgruntled with you, but you still have your hint that you need to pursue companion questlines if you want to see their cool abilities or special items or get them to be a Hero of the Veilguard or whatever…but that’s just my opinion

Basically I wanted subtly and tension. So much more tension.

What we got instead was a couple of annoyed comments and then Emmrich being like “oh dear we’re all distracted by the things that bother us” and everyone offering up distractions that, yes, need to be resolved…but it’s very easy to be like “hey bud the Hand of Glory and the Nadas Dirthalen can wait until the gods aren’t threatening to destroy the world I think.”

It’s not the worst scene in the world, but it could have been reframed better. Either frame it as “Sorry Rook but none of these factions trust you enough to aid you in the fight, you have to prove yourself to them” (and loop in the companion questlines that way) or show your team literally unraveling because they can’t get along or agree with you—now you see the evidence of what you need to fix, and nobody has to outright tell you to “solve everyone’s distractions.” It’s just implied. Because you saw them fighting. A lot.

Like duh I knew I’d have to resolve everyone’s problems if I want them to like me or stick around! That’s just what I’ve come to expect from RPG games like this. It’s an expectation of the genre. But I don’t want to be told that’s my job now. If anything it triggers my contrarian nature and now I want to see what bad ending I get when I don’t listen to the game’s extremely heavy push for me to deal with everyone’s issues

I won’t, but I’m tempted

I just…wanted it to be better. I want see everyone bitching at each other until everyone leaves in a huff and Rook just sits at the table, head in their hands like “oh my god everyone hates me and they hate each other and we’re going to die if everyone can’t get their shit together”

Then maybe Varric sits down next to them and goes, “Hey kid, did I ever tell you about the time Hawke tried to convince a Rivaini pirate, a weird abomination, a Dalish blood mage, a stiff-necked captain of the guard, a broody elf who glowed in the dark, and a few other friends besides to all agree to fight as a team to stop a qunari invasion in Kirkwall? It worked, more or less. By the end of the night, everyone had worked together enough to end up with one dead Arishok and an entire city’s gratitude.”

Maybe Rook looks up and says, “And how’d they manage that little miracle? Without everyone trying to kill each other in the process.”

And maybe Varric smiles and shrugs. “They had their differences, trust me. Half the time you couldn’t put two of them in a room together without a fight breaking out. But they all believed in one thing. They believed in Hawke.”

Then maybe there’s a pause, as he lets Rook consider that for a moment, before he stands up and says, “It’s a good bedtime story, in any case. I’ll let you sleep on it.”

Sigh. It just would have been cool…

Now in all fairness the scene felt even clunkier because I had actively been doing side quests and helping out my friends so it was like…it felt weird to have this implication that I’m not already helping them. It makes me think I shouldn’t do any of their side quests until after the Siege of Weisshaupt but who knows

I keep pendulum swinging back and forth between moments of brilliance and moments that leave me baffled and wondering who made some of these narrative/writing calls. I don’t hate the game by any stretch of the imagination. Like I said the Siege of Weisshaupt was amazing! And I loved the callbacks to precious games! You should have seen me live reacting and screaming about codexes in the Weisshaupt library haha But it’s like whiplash when something that good is followed up by a scene that feels excessively more hamfisted in comparison.

Anyway I am very busy this weekend and dunno when I’ll get to write another update soooo if you’re following for more, hope to give you more updates in the near-ish future!

#dragon age #dragon age the veilguard #datv #da4 #dragon age spoilers #datv spoilers #dragon age critical #adding that last tag just in case #it is critical I guess but I’m not coming at it from a place of hatred #just wishful thinking

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phoenixyfriend · 9 months ago

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Shadow and Mirror

Read on AO3, written for this prompt

Cody has a new crush.

Well, a “crush” implies something much more childish than the point he’s reached in his life.

Cody has… felt a connection and really hit it off with someone he finds reasonably attractive.

His brothers are being less than supportive.

“He is my Jedi and one of my best friends,” Rex says, “but I just… for both your sakes, life will be so much easier if you don’t go for it.”

Cody is unfazed. “You do remember he was my Jedi Commander before he got promoted and took you with him, right? I know what he’s like, and I’m into it.”

Rex makes a face. “Uh, all due respect, Cody—”

Oh, this bitch.

“—but he’s changed in some pretty big ways since he split from Kenobi.”

“So’ve I.”

This earns him an eyeroll. “Yes, yes, you’ve discovered your romantic charisma and started charming the pants off of any sentient you encounter on leave. You do realize that’s part of the problem?”

“That I have game?”

“Skywalker doesn’t do casual,” Rex insists. “Open, maybe, if you talk about it, but he doesn’t do casual.”

After a moment of consideration, Cody shrugs. “I can work with that.”

“Can you?” Rex challenges. “Can you really deal with the full force of Anakin’s attention? With him losing his entire mind if you get hurt, and calling you up at three in the morning to chat, and promising you the galaxy in a bunch of flowery words that should be hyperbole, but really, really worryingly sounds literal and sincere?”

“…did you try dating him?”

“No, but I was there basically every time he hung with Amidala, and that shit continued past the point where he gave up on romantic seduction and settled into friendship,” Rex says, more of a grumpy complaint than anything, “and she’s just as weird as he is when it comes to all that, so it’s no skin off her back to match his energy, but you are not on their level.”

“Rude.”

“I’m just saying,” Rex grits out from between clenched teeth, “that you like to have fun, and Anakin likes to dedicate every morsel of crazy knocking around his brain to whichever poor soul ended up in his affections.”

“I feel like insulting your CO that much is grounds for a court martial.”

“Echo told him, to his face, that he occasionally seemed crazy as a bag of tooka kits and about as hinged as a sliding door. General Skywalker took a second to process, and then laughed. He doesn’t care, not if it’s from a friend.”

Cody hums. “Which you are.”

“Yes.”

“Enough to warn me away before I break his heart?” Cody asks. Rex looks away, and Cody can only chuckle. “You’re not that subtle, Rex.”

“I’m trying to make sure you do what’s best for both of you,” Rex insists, glancing at Cody for only a moment before breaking eye contact again, “so Anakin doesn’t get disappointed, and so you’re not walking in blind when it comes to him being… the most.”

Cody snorts. “I can handle Skywalker, Rex. I may not be a Jedi or a Senator, but I can handle one brat with a smart mouth, a bad attitude, and a couple of super-powers.”

Rex grimaces. “I mean… it’s not really… that simple. The Force stuff, I mean.”

There’s something a little odd to Rex’s voice with that one, more than just the weird pauses. Cody doesn’t dismiss it quite as easily as he might have. Instead, he carefully asks, “the whole ‘Chosen’ thing some of the Shinies were gossiping about? Kenobi said it was an old superstition more than anything, a metaphor taken too literally, and that even the Jedi argue about it.”

“When?”

Cody’s expression must speak for him, because Rex clarifies without prompting.

“When did Kenobi say that?”

Cody looks past him at the wall, frowning as he thinks. Rex waits, and doesn’t take it too personally; they know each other too well for that. Finally, Cody shrugs. “A couple months in. Skywalker was still a Jedi Commander with the 212th.”

“So, before Mortis.”

Oh, for fuck’s sake. “This has to do with that shitshow?”

Rex looks uncomfortable. “You… aren’t 501st.”

“Yeah, and?”

“Well… Kenobi didn’t get possessed. Or channel a god. He just used an extra weird lightsaber for a bit.”

Cody gives it a few moments, and then finally says, “Rex.”

His brother continues to look uncomfortable.

“What did that place do to Skywalker and Tano?”

(Continue on AO3)

#Codakin #Codykin #Anakin Skywalker #Commander Cody #Ahsoka Tano #Clone Trooper Fives #ARC Trooper Fives #Clone Trooper Echo #ARC Trooper Echo #Captain Rex #star wars #the clone wars #eldritch au #phoenix files

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bronx-bomber87 · 9 months ago

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Hello my wonderful fandom :) Thank you for all your lovely comments on me being delayed. Not my usual M.O. but I definitely needed the extra time to process. I was GUTTED and absolutely wrecked. Poor D had to deal with my panic spiral for most of Wednesday. (love you lol) I'll be honest I'm still little shook up and sad. Kinda grateful for the 3 week break tbh between episodes. This was a gut punch I wasn't in the least expecting. Hoping we'll get a S7 announcement during this hiatus. *fingers crossed* Get it together ABC. This took me awhile to unpack emotionally so thank you all again for being so patient.

So I want to preface this post. There will be ZERO And I mean ZERO bashing of Tim in this review from me. Would appreciate that in comments as well. I love conversation you know I love comments. What I don't like is hate being spread. Also nothing on Eric either. I've also seen this which is utter madness. Don't touch our captain. Man loves this fandom so much. Deserves respect. If you came to this review for either of those things please promptly exit stage left. I mean that in the kindest way possible but I love Tim/Eric so it's a non starter with me.

I’ve never so deeply related with a character in all my life as I have with Tim Bradford. I’ll be dissecting this ep to best of my ability. I love both these characters so very much. Why I was knocked out for a couple days before could tackle this. I imagine my thoughts will change when I do my summer in depth one. When we have the rest of the season in pocket. I have to say this won't be mini at all. LOL So lets get rid of that concept right now ha I can't be mini with this ep. I am not brief so thanks for reading. Also hats off to Eric my god he was incredible in this episode. Melissa too killing me left, right and center you two. Let us get started.

6x06 Secret and Lies.

Poor Lucy looks like me when I’m stressed and drained af. Tamara asking how stressed she currently is? Lucy answering 19.....She looks like a 19 if not worse tbh. This is probably the most time they've spent apart since they got together. Basically living together at this point let's be honest. Other than 6x01 they haven't really spent time apart aside from that UC op in 5x21. *sigh*

Tamara asking if Tim is still ghosting her? Lucy trying so hard to keep it together with her answer. My heart. What a wreck she is without Tim. Do love that we get to see her pin-up board btw. Good shot of her room we don’t usually get. That cupcake poster I love it so much. Although now it makes me sad...

Lucy asking what's wrong? Tamara telling her she wants to move out with some friends from school. Crap. Her moving is the last thing she needs…. But it's good for her even though the idea makes me sad. End of an era. Lucy is right she needs to live with people her own age. Doesn’t make it hurt less though. This is a ROUGH season for Lucy my god. The hits keep coming for our girl and I wanna hug her. Shield her somehow....

Lucy touching near her tattoo when she reaches Angela. (Mini gut punch.) I do love her coming to Angela about this. If there is anyone who knows Tim like she does it's Angela. Does help she finds his behavior alarming too. I mean of course she does. You can see the immediate worry. The empathy she has for Lucy is there but she holds her cards close in her advice. Telling her to trust him even though it's literally killing her. Not the council Lucy needed to hear or was looking for.

Lucy wanted more action than 'Just wait and trust him.' She has been trusting him but she’s so insanely worried. Going out of her mind with anxiety for her person. It's exuding out of of her and she looks like she wants to cry…Ugh me too Lucy. I’m an empath and an anxious one at that. I would be going out of my mind too…. Angela looks worried as hell though. Even though she isn't conveying that to Lucy at this point. Breaking my heart as she takes off from their convo. Because if she doesn't she'll lose it right then and there.

God I love Angela Lopez. First off well done on tracking him down. She's just a bad ass. I mean it's one of the reason's Lucy reached out to her tbh. Just gets into his car, drinking his soda, calling him out right away. I love her reasoning saying she can live off Wesley’s trust fund. Lmao. Doesn’t matter as much if she get's fired. 'Wine o'clock.' for her. Gotta love the confidence. I truly hope we get more Tim/Angela scenes the rest of this season. I always adore their dynamic.

Tim is sold on her reasoning and starts to explain the current situation he's trapped in. Angela taking it all in and assessing everything as he explains. Once Tim has succinctly summed up his current predicament Angela's reply is the best. 'I’m in.' lmao I love this woman. ‘I got your back boo.’ That she does. In more ways than he even realizes at this point.

Gotta commend Angela calling him out for walking away from Lucy. Not only that but his job to arrest a guy hasn’t thought of in a decade…. Ain’t no one better than her to be there to call him out his crap right now. Not only that but to really dig deep. To know this is far more than what he's sharing. This is why Angela is an incredible detective rooting things out like this. Saying this is more than just protecting Lucy. Her intuition is out of this world.

I mean she's not wrong. Lucy would understand if it was just about the benefits. She would be proud really. Thing is it's about protecting himself too. Which really just scratches the surface of why he is doing this. Tim knows he's caught even if he shrugs it off. She has him dead to rights and he knows it. 'I’m your BFF. I know you.' Ha it’s true whether you like it or not Timothy…Just like Lucy she has your number.

Angela giving him crap with how they're following Ray. Worried he isn't being smart about this. This is so unlike him to be this sloppy and unfocused. She was right he was tailing too close… Ray catches on to their tail quickly. When he scanned the vehicle made me so nervous. Doing it while he's taunting Tim. He's so detail oriented blows my mind Tim let that get by him. This SL gave me such MASSIVE anxiety as I watched it. Oh my lord.

The minute they get back to Angela's place she calls him out once again. Asking why he thinks this is ALL his fault? Tim shrugs it off and she refuses to take that as his final answer. Of course Angela was right there is far more to this story. Tim finally opens up to her about what happened. He had been leading his squadron for some time. Looking to move up to Sergeant.

The catch was he couldn’t be promoted if there was rampant criminality in his unit. Ray clearly was in the way of him moving up. Tim figured he could keep it within his unit if they went after him.. Oh Tim…. It was an unsanctioned mission too. Thinking if he could accomplish this would be easy fast track to his promotion.

Kills me to know he was there during the air strike ugh… Details missing from the last episode. The Humvee saved him and Mark but not his other men… I can't imagine what Tim felt in that moment. The immense amount of guilt laid on his soul from here on out. I mean it makes sense why he never left patrol before Lucy. The last time he tried to advance his career this happened. My broken boy.

Eric CRUSHES this scene. I wanna cry. My poor Timothy. He was more focused more on his career than his oath...Got two of his men killed. My damn heart. He’s so ashamed of himself. The way he points at himself when he says 'leadership.' I knew his military past would be dark but holy crap. I wanted more of his backstory and they delivered that in spades. What a gut punch this had to be for him. No doubt his men were loyal af to him. Would've followed him anywhere and did.

He carries leading those men to their deaths because they followed his leadership. Oof. That is quite the weight to keep on your soul. Also gives us insight to why he shoulders everything. Even when he doesn't have to. Punishing himself for past transgressions such as this. I'm sure when we get to the other side of this season, I will have an even deeper respect for the writers going into his backstory like this. Giving us even more insight to this man.

This hurts so good to get this kind of info. I have no doubt that’s why he shut Lucy out. The shame he feels is overwhelming. I totally get it. Nothing scarier than someone knowing your darkest secrets. Not only that but worrying they’ll think less of you due to it. Tim already struggles with self loathing. Been a theme for him his entire arc on this series. Something I've touched on a lot. This is truly bringing that to light in the most painful way.

We see Ray scanned Tim's car in order to gain access to it. To check his GPS to see where he's been. How he's been tracking him. When he scrolls down to Lucy's address. Made my stomach sink. Legit felt sick to my stomach....

I do love Lucy coming home and having Tamara there. Saying she ordered pizza for them. This is exactly what she needs. Do you really have to go Tamara? I wonder if she'll delay leaving now after this ep. There is a knock at the door and of course it's not the pizza. It's Ray. Hair's on the back of my neck stood up from the moment he entered that apt.

I know Melissa stated in her interview she was nervous about this scene. That she came off awkward in her anger. You are incorrect madam. Holy hell Lucy is a BAMF. Telling him the only call she's gonna make is for the ambulance. Because when she's done with him he's going to need it to wheel him out. Holds her ground like the confident bad ass we've all loved seeing her become.

Lucy calling him shaking and demanding where he was. Ooh lord hell fire coming with her through that front door. I love Angela grabbing Tamara to another room. Like let's go mom and dad are about to have a big blow out. Let's give them some space...

Tim asking if she's ok? Truly concerned but Lucy isn't having ANY of it. 'Do I look ok?' Damn no she doesn't....Ripping into him saying how that creep could've showed up when she wasn't there. Lucy is not wrong....Oh my lord I’ve never seen her so damn mad. She is RAGING at him and rightfully so. Her home was violated, Tamara was put in danger and threatened. All because Tim was trying to protect her. phew.

Tim FINALLY concedes to telling her something. It only seems to enrage her more. She is literally vibrating with anger in this scene with him. The more he tells her the more it doesn't explain why he left her in the dark. Lucy begging him to read her in. I mean she has earned that my love. ..Telling him to stop protecting her. Gah Tim is a deep loyalist who would protect anyone he loves even if it's not the right thing. His reply is a reflection of that.

'I can't. I won't.' He's so driven to keep her safe. His instinct is to protect her but doesn't see he's hurting her in the process. I knew she was going to be pissed he let Angela in and not her. But Tim was right she has a lot less to lose. Which doesn't seem pertinent in this moment...I do love her placing her hands on his when she also replies. 'I can't. I won't.'

Mirroring his words from moments ago. Just like he will never stop protecting her. Lucy will never stop fighting for him or longing to help him. That man is her entire world. The most important person in her life. It makes perfect sense she would help with this. Career be damned. I mean she risked her career to get him a shot at Metro. Of course she would do the same thing in order to shoulder his burden with him.

Love her standing her ground in this moment. Like damnit I love you and you are going to let me in. Whether you like it or not I am here and I'm going to help. If this wasn't a reflection of the communication problems that still painfully exist between them I don't know what is. I mean she tried to be patient and trust him. But honestly he needed this kick in the ass to let her in. Which is a problem. Lucy needs to be the first person he goes to. It shouldn't have to come to this. *sigh*

Their OP goes off without a hitch. Except Ray saying he was going to be an air strike on Tim's life.... God I had no idea as I was watching that scene how true it would be. Tim gets his interview and lies to protect Angela and Lucy. While keeping his own job intact as well. Also welcome back to Jackson’s dad. Hello there Percy. This is not how I wanted to see him again.

But he is IA him returning was never gonna be a good thing tbh in a post Jackson world. Regardless it was nice to see him again. The scene is Grey's office is ROUGH. Never seen Wade so disappointed in Tim. It hurts to watch. Just like this entire gut punch of an episode. Tim is just standing there in utter shame of everything. Ashamed Wade is looking at him like this.

Kills me Grey has to inform Pine of what he did. It makes sense he has to but damn that sucks. The amount of respect Tim has for Wade is immense. To watch him tear Tim apart and just stand there like a puppy being scolded hurts my soul. Especially when he tries to fight Pine knowing. Just dismissing him without further comment or argument...

So I will say this and it's not at all fair to Lucy that I thought this I'm sure. But I felt like if there was gonna be a breakup it would be coming from her. Not Tim in this moment. That's the part of this moment that really knocked the wind out of me. She had every damn right to be the one too btw. Instead she is there waiting for him with open arms. Honestly I took a breath for the first time this entire episode when she welcomed him in.

Wrapping him up in her arms. Encasing him, rubbing his back, her fingers in his hair. Gently cradling him against her. I thought ok maybe we'll be alright. Since Lucy isn't nearly as angry as she was earlier. Maybe they can get through this together. Cause she loved on him regardless of what happened. The unconditional love she has for this man blows me away. I honestly thought with her loving on him maybe they'd make it out. That they’d work through it together.

Tim looks so very defeated. On the verge of an actual breakdown as he explains that he lied about everything. Saying it saved his job...protected Angela and her. It doesn't seem like enough of a win to him. He looks so very destroyed and this is just the beginning of his downward spiral.

Lucy is doing everything to be his rock in this moment. To assuage him of his guilt… Most vulnerable ever seen Tim *pre tears*…. Lucy telling him it was an impossible situation. She would've done the same thing. It’s so very clear she was willing to work through this. To build them back to where they were before he got that phone call. Everything Lucy was in this scene represented her unconditional love for him. Tim is just too destroyed at the moment to see it….Also for him to accept it. It's so hard to truly accept unconditional love if you've never had it before. To truly trust in it.

Lucy is watching him spiral out of control. The way he's talking about himself with such loathing. How she never would've been in a place where she put her self interest over her team like him. She is trying her damndest to right his wrong. But Tim is having none of it. It pains me to see it... Pains Lucy too. It's the way she grabs onto him while he continues his verbal self flogging that get's me.

Trying to ground him in this moment with her touch. Bring him back to her. Something that has worked so well in the past. Sadly not having the intended affect this time around. Tim is too damn gone at this point. He feels he’s betrayed everything he thought he was. THOUGHT he was. *heart clutch* Tim has such a deep moral compass. That's why this is rocking him so very much. Ugh my heart. I too have a crazy deep moral compass. I can't say I wouldn't be spiraling out like him as well.

This was his greatest sin brought to light. To Tim exposing him for the fraud he feels he is. Him saying he's been lying to himself for a long time is a reflection of this. That imposter syndrome coming out real strong here. Something he buried deep down came rushing to the forefront and he is imploding. Says as much above. He no longer feels worthy to be in her life now. I get this anytime I screw up with a friend or my sister. I have this deep sense of shame attached to it. Like I no longer deserve that friend or my sister cause I messed up or if a past sin comes up. That they'll no longer love me or will forever look at me differently cause of it.

It's not logical but it's deeply ingrained from my mom shaming me for doing anything wrong growing up. As it is for Tim. His father literally beat the hell out of him for ever being out of line. He has suffered emotional and physical abuse. Unless confronted and treated comes out like this. Demons making their way to the surface. I was bawling by the time he said 'I'm sorry.' He’s never seen himself worthy of Lucy’s love that much has always been evident. But to see it this raw and visceral ripped my heart out. It’s on the ground where they're both standing.

I think this is something that has been brewing in the background for Tim for a long time. Now that I've had time away to decompress and think. I'm actually very excited they're tackling this. It's clear Tim is not in a place where he thinks he deserves her anymore. Low key never has been. He acts before he thinks. Eric had a great quote from his interview about Tim "He is impulsive and he reacts instead of thinking things through, and it can come out a bit too strong.” That is this decision in a nutshell. He feels he is a burden therefore he is removing himself without thinking it through. The regret that is going to come with this is going to be immense for him.

'You deserve so much better.' Better than me basically. He feels immense shame and that shame is launching him away from her. You know I learned something in therapy about this. About not being perfect and feeling like I'm too much. i.e. a burden. My therapist told me and it made me cry. 'You are worthy of the space you take up in people's lives. They want you there.' Tim does not think he is worthy of the space he is taking up in Lucy's life now. All his sins on the table laid out for her to see. He can't handle it. That much is very clear here. I will say I haven’t let a ship hurt me like this in a long time.

This absolutely crushed me. I couldn't even fathom assembling my thoughts. Cut me very deep. Been with this ship since day one. Also what a crushing blow this is for Lucy. Our poor girl. I mean she gave everything to this relationship. I mean EVERYTHING. She was all in from the moment Tim said ‘Unless it is.’ This was her first real relationship. First real leap into being serious. Thinking about marriage and kids. She gave her all to Tim my god. Her career took a hit for him and she never complained. Knew he was worth it (he still is btw) Fought every step of the way for him. For them.

When he was pulling back above it was an absolute panic for her. She could see him slipping through her fingers. Idk what broke my heart more Tim thinking he’s not worthy of her any longer or her begging him not to do this. She literally can't fathom how he can let go of her like this. Thought she was his person. Tim feels he’s gone back to who he was pre-Lucy and that scares him. He feels undeserving of the love she has to give him. Lucy knows everything and in his mind he can’t imagine her still loving him.

Lucy was as we all were in this scene. In disbelief... Even though Tim put her though absolute hell she was still there to comfort and support him. Because to her he is worth it even in the hard times. We all know Tim isn’t the best with his emotions. In his trauma damaged brain he thinks he’s doing the right thing here. That he’s radioactive, she deserves better than being around him and his reckless behavior.

The kiss on her head. Lucy trying to physically push away his rejection. Stomping all over my damn heart...However this ends up playing out Tim is going to have to address his emotional instability. How he charges forward and doesn’t think things through. Ruled by his emotions in the worst way. He’s impulsive and he’s gonna have to fight to get her back when he’s in a better mindset. Her trust has been obliterated by this. She fought and clawed for them and this was her reward. He’s gonna have to do some serious healing to get back to her. Lucy has loved him the best she can but he needs to put in some work now. We see next ep he's meeting with Aaron's therapist. Don't love that but I’ve wanted Tim to go to therapy for years. He needs this. Therapy doesn’t work unless you put the effort in though.

That will be a challenge for him. When I get out of the purview of this hurt I’m feeling...I’m actually going to be really impressed and happy they had Tim go through this. Do I think this is the end of them? No I think this is some serious growing pains. It was issues that have been percolating since Lucy did that 5 player trade. Hell probably back in 5x12 when Tim sacrificed himself without telling her so they could stay together. I still think that was romantic because of it's intended nature. BUT was the beginning of the communication problems. They’ve grown so very much in that regard. We’ve seen it but there is still work to be done on that front. It just came to a very gutting painful head.

I still have faith in the writers. I still have faith they’ll be ok. It might not be right away and I'm already feeling impatient tbh. But this is some serious realism being applied to them. It wasn't some random BS angst. Honestly we’re lucky our ship gets the most attention, the best SL’s and two people who LOVE these characters. They absolutely adore them and this ship. If you haven’t read Melissa and Eric’s interviews for this episode I highly recommend. This sucks right now. No two ways about it. But we will survive this storm. They’ll come out stronger than ever. Truly believe that. But for now let's rally around each other and get through this together. There will be brighter days ahead just doesn't feel like it right now. We got this.

~~~

Side notes non Chenford.

Do love Aaron working with Harper all if of all I cared about other than their SL in this one. Nolan's I fast forwarded which I normally don't do but I had no patience for his BS in this ep lol My anxiety was rampant in this ep and had no space for him.

Also RIP Metro Tim for the 6x07 promo. This hurts to see not just cause I enjoyed him in that outfit lol But to see his career take a nosedive like this. I wanted more Tim back story. Didn’t think would hurt like this though....Feel free to comment I love you all for any interaction I get with these. <3

#Caitlin mini reviews #chenford #s6 #the rookie 6x06 #6x06 Secret and Lies #otp: unless it is #otp: doing my job #the rookie #tim x lucy #tim bradford #lucy chen #lucy x tim #eric winter #melissa o'neil #tim bradford x lucy chen

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