#and i was like yes? not really sure what package to be expecting and its my ORIGINAL FUCKING ORDER

[iceunhie]

— out of this world (and into another) : genshin impact

premise: you could've sworn the transmigration curse didn't have an effect on you... so what exactly are you doing here?! (alternatively, you tumble straight into your favorite video game; and you're kinda fucked)

...or, a genshin manhwa otome game inspired au.

act i: scaramouche, alhaitham, wriothesley.

↳ act ii: lyney, neuvilette, kazuha, kaeya. (next)

warnings. fem!reader but can be imagined as genderless if u'd like hehe, a shit ton of manhwa tropes in one, this is a hot mess aka not proofread all that much, half clunky half decent writing

a/n: as promised via the poll heh,, while i do plan to make this an actual au, im not that sure ^^; just the tip of the iceberg here tho!!

MAIN MASTERLIST | AU MASTERLIST (coming soon)

YOU — unsuspecting civilian turnt transmigrator

you've always been too attached to fictional characters for your own good.

yes, even the ones that are remarkably irredeemable (the power of a backstory is very formidable) and complex (complexity is a virtue!)

villains have always been destined to die, be cursed, or destined to curse others. it was heartbreaking, really. you've wished for a chance to rewrite their fates for them to find even a sliver of happiness, even when the fate of their plot says otherwise.

which is why when you find yourself awake into the game of your dreams, “Teyvat's Seven Stars”, like any lover of cliche novel and manhwa tropes, this is the time you think that maybe life wasn't so shitty on you.

....there's only one tiny, teensy, itty bitty problem here, actually.

you're not the protagonist. you're not even one of the protagonist's faithful friends and underlings that light protagonist's road to conquering the world and its men (and as of the 4.0 update, it's women); no, you're none of those.

you're a no name extra, and not to mention, a character involved with the game's main villain characters who are coincidentally the love interests of the game's black route!

[ unlock transmigration package: ultimate transmigrator's route ( ????? MODE ) ]

[ no ] [ yes ]

( 国崩 ) SCARAMOUCHE — the tyrant

“as of today, you will be engaged to crown prince kunikuzushi, who is her grace the shogun's rightful heir to the throne.”

when given approval to stare at your so-called soon to be husband, you expect the worst, mostly. the multitudes of character dialogue you've played through detailing his rather discourteous personality (which basically meant he was a huge asshole) don't exactly paint a pretty picture.

however...

who was this tender hearted looking scaramouche that ‘obliterated armies in the blink of an eye?’ the t in tyrant stands for tyrannical, not timid!

eyes like lighting framed by the longest eyelashes you've ever seen and an unfairly pretty face, comparable to a fair lotus. after fawning over his otherworldly countenance, a sinking realization of dread pools in your stomach.

oh, you are so screwed.

essentially tied to the indigo-haired ticking time bomb of a future tyrant due to the strong standing of your family for a period of until the main story starts, you're destined to never get crown prince scaramouche's affection, being his fiancée who scaramouche is arranged to for political means only.

not to mention, you're in an even more deadly position; of all the characters you switched souls with, it's the one that essentially dies by their own fiancé's hand because they were horrible to him! what atrocious luck!

frantic, you wrack up about three ways to survive.

plan a) win over the shogun's favor by being an appropriate partner unlike the original flavor of this body, who resorted to bullying the innocent prince and unknowingly digging their own grave or b) be a guiding friend to scaramouche as he learns the ways of the world and c) make sure you don't end up giving the protagonist a bad ending via his twisted personality.

weighing all these options, you decide to do all three in hopes to cement a life instead of a deathflag. prevention is better than the cure (aka: the protagonist) after all!

(you may also just want to spend time with your favorite character. having a time limit and a sign that says ‘i'll die in the future!’ should at least warrant you extra time to show some affection to scaramouche, at least.)

so, you do what anyone in your position would do: give affection! lots of it.

admittedly, it wasn't all flowers and rainbows. scaramouche—ahem, kunikuzushi—was very shy and reserved indeed, with his mother ei even worse off! (besides, who trains and studies all day and has to stop crying every time they were injured?! that was just too much!)

it was rather hard at first, the frigid atmosphere of the usually silent Tenshukaku Palace almost impossible to permeate. but with your amazing charm (read: deathflag radar) and social skills, you manage to let the members of the Royal family open up to you.

speaking words of praise in ei's cooking (a very difficult feat to accomplish), spending afternoons with your fiancé and teaching him ‘how to be a shoujo worthy male lead, name-version’ (very confusing to explain), and the cherry on top, driving away that vile teacher of his—the Doctor—once word got out that he'd been taking advantage of scaramouche as a political puppet king in the future. trauma enabler destroyed! look at your immeasurable powers!

(“you're not a failure.” clasping kunikuzushi's hands in yours as he reels back from you. damn that doctor.

his tears shot a wave of heartache through you. you can't bear to see your favorite in such suffering. “whatever happens in the future, i won't abandon you.

no matter what, i'll always be on your side, okay?”

kunikuzushi looks at you with something in his eyes—something like adoration. “do you promise that?”

“yeah.” you say without hesitation, the glow of the sunlight hitting your face so dazzlingly that kunikuzushi's eyes widen that his mouth hangs agape in awe. “i promise, kuni.”)

to your greatest delight, your efforts worked in your favor.

ei now spends time with her son, and though it's almost always just a tad bit awkward, you and the guuji yae miko get the two to strike up conversation, and overtime, kunikuzushi becomes more open to you.

(“[name], what kind of man is your type?”

“huh? well...” you think for a while. this was a great opportunity to say it, right? that life changing protagonist quote!

“to me, the only person i'll ever like the most is you, kunikuzushi.”

“do you really, really mean that?” and oh, he looks so cute—flustered and red from your words. worth it.

“yup! now, i made some shimi chazuke, try some—”)

(admittedly, lots of favoritism is involved.)

—and while you reap the fruits of your hard work, you spend warm, sunlit afternoons with ei at tea, even learning about other nations from scaramouche's aunt nahida and even befriended a few of his future affiliates—childe (though for some reason, kunikuzushi always pulls you away from him whenever he spots the two of you together), signora (she tolerates you, you think) and etcetera.

(“then, if i do well, can you kiss me on the cheek, [name]?”

you agree, much to his delight. scaramouche avoids the gaze of a certain pink haired fox eyeing him questionably. unbeknownst to you, he glares at the woman's scrutiny.)

unprecedented things unrelated to the plot happen too; like how your family, which basically only saw you as a political bargaining chip and an unwanted child they could get rid of easily—no longer sent you any demeaning letters demanding money once scaramouche found out....

(“they've been leeching off of you for how long?” so scary... is this was kunikuzushi is like when he's worried?)

(“...kunikuzushi, how long will you keep up that weak-hearted facade of yours? if they find out how.... dishonest you are....”

“i don't need the reminders of a foxy old hag that doesn't know her place. this is fine as it is.”)

(you don't need to know.)

but, you're nothing compared to the inevitable flow of the plot. inazuma is wracked with war, and it just so happened that you'd been unceremoniously kidnapped by a certain resistance leader's trusted general, used as a hostage bargain for approximately the majority of your life. in the worst moments in your dreary cell, there's only one thought in your mind.

....kunikuzushi's face, devastated when he tries to reach for you, before slipping away from him like sand— face morphing into an unbridled state of rage that's too natural, too familiar. when did he learn to make a face like that?

(they say the kingdom was wracked with thunderstorms all night that day.)

afterwards, fate doesn't make it kind for you.

years go by in the blink of an eye, with your capture fervently forgotten in the midst of the growing animosity of the two conflicting forces.

although you did hear that yae sent out a search party for you while at the resistance's base, the shogun's forces never reached you.

eventually, you got released secretly by sympathy of kokomi, the leader of the resistance, who felt pity for you getting caught in the crossfire. letting you go under the condition that you'd likely never meet any of the precious characters you've gotten to know and change was a heavy price to pay, but you didn't have any choice.

indeed, no matter how much you tried to divert the plot, your duty as an extra has ended, and you were even lucky to even be alive. you could only hope that your fiancé—ex-fiancé—took note of your lessons well, bidding farewell to inazuma as you hop on the boat to mondsdat.

by now, you at least hoped that scaramouche and the protagonist met, his true chance at happiness starting now that you were basically dead.

(even if your heart felt like breaking into a million pieces.)

....is what you thought would happen, but why is it that after three years from your supposed capture, inazuma was still at war?

“that crazy prince... he's still working to find his former fiancée... and he's razing almost every village apart looking for them!”

“—didn't the shogunate say that whoever finds her would receive almost 3 million mora?”

“the entire lot of them are lunatics, i tell you. all because of a missing person, too!”

what's more, why was it still going because of you?!

( 艾尔海森 ) AL-HAITHAM: the information guild master

to be fair, normal people don't really run into one of their favorite characters often after transmigrating.

but to be fair, again, you certainly didn't think you'd actually be in your favorite video game franchise caged in bed with essentially one of its main love interests.

eyes wide and unceremoniously looking—definitely not ogling— at the toned body that's currently enveloping you in its arms, the soft tuft of ashy gray hair caressing the crook of your neck, murmuring incoherent mumbles of—is that another language?

???????

you blink, looking down at the bare body currently embracing you. oh. oh.

you're an extra.

you're just an extra, but why are you in bed, currently being served breakfast by the most gorgeous man you've ever laid your eyes on, with a pretty view of the rainforests' canopy?

“you should lie down. if i recall, sufficient sleep is required in order for the human body to perform its basic bodily functions. although our partnership is temporary, to let you fall to harm is a situation i'd like to avoid as much as possible.”

“....what?”

“...?”

the guild master, al-haitham, is a character in Teyvat's Seven Stars that is heavily debated on whether he's technically a villain or not. in the game, he's the right hand of sumeru's leader, nahida, working as the overseer of the AKASHA, a guild that gathers information to the nation's leader. he's a pretty shady character—always working behind the scenes and very unfalteringly blunt—and a ‘villain’ for crown prince scaramouche's route, helping the protagonist escape his clutches.

he's often the subject of comedic ire, his banters with a certain broke architect always the highlight of any bonafide al-haitham fan.

“we're expected to work together by lord kusanali's decree in the duration of investigating the hivemind project the lord suspects the baron siraj is partaking in.”

right, that one scene in the game where al-haitham needed to go undercover to infiltrate a coup de etat staged by one of the factions against nahida... right... what.

you were that extra! the one that fell in love with him and pined for his affection!

(“well, i get that part, but does sleeping together really have to play a part in this...?”

al-haitham gives you a mere quirk of the lip, tilting his head. “we do have to play the part of a married couple in dire straights, do we not? this cover is more efficient.

...besides, i don't have anything to complain about. you're certainly better company than kaveh.” )

in truth, al-haitham wasn't bad company. far from it. aside from the internal giggling and fangirling (you) and the incredible stack of books (alhaitham) that you have to see more than the grey haired man on a daily basis, the two of you work out a rapport that stems from memories of the body you transmigrated in.

he's nice to be around, surprisingly considerate when he wants to be—he tells you about the books he always reads....

(who even reads ‘20 Tongues Language Memorization Guidebook: A Basic Overview of Vocabulary and Terms’ for enjoyment?

the content makes your head run in circles because of how complicated it is; but who wouldn't like to listen to an extremely attractive man overexplain to you with a calm and pretty voice?)

...is generous enough to provide meals and cook dinners that have you crying tears of gratitude because you know how awful yours compares (it was either too bland or too seasoned; al-haitham is surprisingly picky when he wants to be)

(you assigned al-haitham the title of “absolute s-tier husband material”— his capabilities are out of this world!)

by chance, you once gave al-haitham a little tidbit of information that proved to be valuable later in the investigation—courtesy of your avid game knowledge—when you two had been lost to the psychological illusion magic cast by siraj when you two finally broke in his estate.

(“whatever happens, if siraj messes with your mind, just make sure to think of me instead of anything else.” al-haitham lets his hand find yours.

“you once asked me if i trusted you, [name].”

“....” you're treated to one of al-haitham's rare smiles, one that warms you up from within. “i do. so don't let yourself get hurt.”)

however, your temporary partner had faltered for once, flinching when siraj took the form of his old grandmother who'd passed to exploit al-haitham's mind, hesitating and frozen in place while siraj inched ever closer to finding out his weakness.

and you couldn't stand it, the character you cared for—the al-haitham that always had a plan, always knew how to stay calm, had looked so unsure and hopeless.

(“wake up, al-haitham!”

with you cradling his face, al-haitham stares back at the only constant in the memories of his grief, eyes meeting yours. “you don't have to do it all alone. i'm right here, aren't i? believe in me.”)

your (fake) husband snaps back to reality, finally allowing enough time to apprehend siraj and put a stop to his malicious project.

(“thank you.” al-haitham tells you solemnly. it hits you that this may be the last time you may ever see him. “i'm grateful that you brought me back to y— to my senses.”

there's a sincerity in your voice that rings from your heart. “anytime, al-haitham.”)

you thought that was the end of it.

defeating siraj meant you two no longer had to associate with each other, but somehow, to your great surprise, al-haitham doesn't stick to the plot at all. you were sure you didn't interfere with the game, though?

for some reason, al-haitham doesn't erase himself from your life, unlike the original route's flow.

in fact, he's become... easy to run into, a constant in your otherwise mundane life. he takes you out to lambad's tavern for an occasional drink, says he's lending you his headphones when you find yourself overwhelmed by the city (you were never good with noises) and even helps you out as you vent your problems to him.

(the day after, said problem conveniently disappears. how strange....)

and most of all, allowing you to enter his personal space... leaving kaveh's jaw dropping when he accuses al-haitham of having a lover.

“you're always going who knows where with them! what else is there to figure out?”

“...we are merely friends.”

“a friend that you let into your personal library? do they know that you still keep the ‘fake’ ring in a box inside the closet?” kaveh laughs. “nice try, al-haitham.”

(after all, kaveh could never unsee the way al-haitham's eyes softened at the feeling of the head on his shoulder lean onto him, with you no doubt asleep. he even took his headphones off! kaveh has never seen him actually take them off in order to keep the person who's sleeping on his shoulder as undisturbed as possible.

in fact, kaveh doesn't think he's ever seen al-haitham be this touchy or considerate with anyone this much before.

.....and most importantly, kaveh would never forget the way al-haitham, a man who found no merit in politeness and preferred bluntness, a man who preferred solitude rather than company—deliberately getting close to someone—pressing a fleeting kiss on the crown of your head.

kaveh blinks. it seems even the throes of love can reach even the most unconquerable of peaks....)

( 莱欧斯利 ) WRIOTHESLEY — the monster duke of the north

“—i need you to gather information on duke wriothesley. serve him undercover as one of the prisoners of the fortress.”

the duke of meropide—a man swamped with terrible rumors. they say he was exiled from the nation due to murdering his entire family. they say he possessed a face worthy of the title of a beast— grotesque, littered in scars. they say that any who end up in his estate, the iron prison of the north, meropide, never saw the light of day again.

(“only criminals of the worst kind are fated to be sentenced there. nobody returns, so we've stopped questioning it...” )

so to say you're not fearing for your life that bad right now is a massive understatement.

“now, mind telling me how you were able to sneak into the most impenetrable prison in all the land, miss prisoner?”

how did it end up like this?

so you wake up and find yourself in jail. lovely.

seriously, of all the places you can transmigrate into, why did it have to be fontaine?! Teyvat's Seven Stars chapter 4's main starting point, the nation of justice is littered with dark themes and high difficulty capture targets.

.... such is the case with the man in front of you. unlike what the rumors of him say, duke wriothesley paints a rugged yet dashing picture of a nobleman, even if he was —if you recall— one of the hardest capture targets to conquer in the game.

a villain character who you played once during one game route, acting as the driving force during one of the love events of one of the protagonist's other love interest, lyney. duke wriothesley almost assassinates lyney's younger brother, freminent, leading lyney to rally up a certain group to bring the nobleman down.... a typical side character villain, who's existence was added as late as 3 patches away from lyney's.

(even inazuma would be better than this! at least the tyrant route could be avoided, and let's not mention the easy sumeru route as well...)

“well, miss prisoner, cat got your tongue?”

in summary: fortunately for you, the body you transmigrated is in the position to spy on the current affairs of the fortress of meropide, with courtesy and with permission of one of Fontaine's leaders, neuvillette. unfortunately for you, it seems our dear monsieur wasn't able to inform wriothesley beforehand, leading to the current situation.

aka, you're pressed dangerously close to wriothesley's chest, with a knife at his throat and his hands pinning you against the wall, noses almost touching. you're not sure if this is even the kind of tension that two people who are trying to kill each other are supposed to have...

(“i'm an ally!” you sputter out. wriothesley raises an eyebrow at you. “monsieur neuvillette sent me.”

“how am i supposed to trust you after i saw you slinking around here, knife at my throat?” he replies, eyes narrowing. “i know that i'm labelled as a beast, but i don't really know what came over that pretty little head of yours when trying to sneak into my chambers.”

what does he take you for?! “...are you accusing me of something indecent?!”

“just saying — i've met lots of prisoners with your excuse, my lady.”

“i'm prepared to use this knife, you know.”

“hah.” wriothesley grins. “how aggressive. more aggressive than most. do you want me that bad?”

“stop twisting my words!”)

in any case, you hate wriothesley. you know he's one of the characters in Teyvat's Seven Stars and is a villain for one of the easy love interest routes in the game, but his personality is... a real piece of work.

you'd rather the protective and kind kazuha, or even the charming and elusive lyney! why did it have to be him?

not only did he not believe you, he even told you to prove your authenticity! you're just glad that his assistant sigewinne had been there to vouch for you — you're not sure if you'd even be on your two feet right now if she didn't.

so now you're stuck constantly on your feet, running to and fro — helping the dark-haired man record new prisoners, establishing trading routes to the main city of Fontaine, and treating other prisoners of the fortress with sigewinne.

your biggest surprise by far, though, is just how... different the duke is from the rumors. his scars were merely battle scars of honor (to which sigewinne rolls her eyes, “your grace, please stop trying to look cool”) he got from various succession fights, not scars to show how he was cursed to turn into a beast. he has a love for tea, but always seems to have a cup of your favorite blend with him when you feel tired after a long day of working (laboring) for him and the estate.

(“your daily report of new convicts, your grace.”

“-this is the tea you like, your grace. i've prepared it in advance.”

“you're very adamant on proving yourself. aren't you sick of such tasks by now, miss prisoner?”

“no.” wriothesley's expression screams 'why not?' on it. “ it's because of my own misjudgement of you.”

“...elaborate.”

“i may have had unnecessary prejudices on your conduct thus far. but you're... not like what the rumors paint you out to be.” you say sincerely. “you're more amazing and incredible than anyone else. i truly do admire you.”

wriothesley's expression; you couldn't decipher it. “i see.”)

he's battered, but caring. sigewinne makes you watch (in horror) as she doodles cartoonish looking characters on his face when he's asleep — wriothesley never fusses, only an exasperated sigh to his assistant. he's harsh with his tasks and duties, but is the first to rush you into sigewinne's infirmary to tend to you after you pass out from overwork.

(“don't worry, [name]. the duke may not look it, but he's very gentle!” sigewinne giggles. humoring the little girl who was the first to show you actual decency in this place, you try to nod. sigewinne doesn't seem convinced.

“i'm serious! after all, compared to other people who've snuck into the fortress, you're the first he's treated this way.” she says cheerily.

“what does that mean?” you can't help but scoff at that. “so he just works someone to the bone from the get go?” you shudder. damn production zone...

sigewinne blinks. “ oh no, not like that. it's just that he's never been so lenient before. in fact, when you fainted, he even gave me the order to prioritize treating you over anything else.”)

well, this wasn't exactly what you thought you would be doing when you transmigrated into your favorite game, but you suppose you can take it.

besides, you'd miss a certain duke otherwise. life truly is full of strange twists....

a/n: thank you for making it this far! if anyone asks why wriothesley's was short, listen, this was completely impulsive and i was out of inspiration LOL, but i do hope you enjoy! look forward to new parts though hehe :3

@ ICEUNHIE: do not repost translate or plagiarize my works.

[maimaily]

the lads boys as kittens. 🪐 ‧₊˚ xavier

summary: You were living in your new apartment now, a free space for yourself, but maybe it was too free. You weren't quite used to the silence and loneliness of it, so you decided to welcome a little one to your home. After considering many options, a cat seemed adequate: clean, independent, wouldn't take much of your time like a dog… right?

characters: kitty!xavier (other characters will be posted separately), mc as reader.

a/n: cat breeds are selected based on the "Yes, Cat Caretaker" event. If there's any change, it'll be based on the appearance of each breed, but not its personality traits strictly. proofread but if there's any mistake please let me know! (eng isn't my first language).

rafayel 🢒 zayne 🢒 sylus 🢒 caleb (coming soon)

Xavier — Ragdoll How did he get to live with you?

You adopted him. He was going to be your first cat, so you wanted to make sure you were choosing the right one, and receiving recommendations from an adoption center was the best idea. You went there and heard of a slightly older cat who hadn't been adopted yet. A single look was enough to know he was the one. His bright blue eyes stared at you, and his paws tried to reach you as you got closer. A little nervous of scaring him, you gently allowed him to sniff your finger, and he then rubbed against your hand. It is not necessary to say you decided you'd give your life for him.

On the way home, the little kitty curled into a puffy ball of fur, sleeping peacefully after feeling safe in your warm arms ♡

Little did you know what this little thing really was !!

This kitty EATS. A LOT. You can easily win his heart with treats. He can smell them even before you open any can or package, but will wait like the good boy he is, with both front paws stomping cutely on the floor. However, you had to cut back on them because your wallet was starting to suffer the consequences of a gluttonous kitten. Poor thing got upset for a while, but the food was still yummy, so he adapted (he's not that much of a picky eater…)

Eepy baby. He's a sweetheart and always, I repeat, always cuddles to take naps with you. The kind of cat who climbs onto the bed the moment you flop down on it and makes his way between your arms to be cuddled and sleep. Purrs quietly and very softly, and will rub against your hands as he does. Rarely meows, but does it when he's being needy. Has fallen asleep while eating or drinking his warm milk more than once, his little chin all dirty, so you have to clean him (he doesn't like it!).

He follows you everywhere. Whatever you're doing, if you're walking around the house, he'll follow you like a loyal knight. His fluffy tail moves gently against your legs when you're standing, washing the dishes, brushing your teeth, or cooking. Sometimes he expects you to see him (you do) to pick him up (you always do). He's a needy boy! Needs lots and lots of your attention!

Talking about attention, he climbs onto your body when he feels neglected. You were happily cooking, humming the songs on your playlist, chopping vegetables for the new dish you wanted to try- and then oop! The weight of a fluffy hairball snags on the fabric of your hoodie back without warning. "Xavi! Don't move- Don't move!" you urgently exclaimed as you slowly moved back from the hot stove. Can you blame him? He just wanted to spend time with you :(

Great hunter in every shape! A cockroach? He's already smacking it with his paws. A fly? He already jumped to catch it. Mosquitos? He saw them even before you did. If by any chance there's a mouse or rat inside, be sure he's getting rid of it! And he's so fast! (Give him a treat afterwards, he deserves it.)

Grumpy if you wake him up. He hates the vacuum cleaner with his life, and hates it even more if you decide to use it when he's just fallen asleep. When you switched to an automatic one, he smacked it with his angry paws each time it bumped onto him. Doesn't hiss at you, he's too docile for that, but will meow very loudly until you comfort him back to sleep (and give him treats-).

His favorite place to make biscuits is your chest while you're lying down. If you're watching some TV, reading a book, scrolling down your phone, or simply flopped down on the sofa or your bed, he climbs on top of you and makes his way to your chest and starts kneading very gently. He never uses his claws on you, so you allow him to do it, it's his way of bonding with you and relieving some stress after all <3.

Sulkynator 2000. Baby boy gets UPSET to astronomical levels when you even mention other cats. Do NOT play with his little heart like this! :( Why are you watching cat videos if he's right there? He can do tricks too! Or why are you petting the neighbor's dog? He's dirty and too loud! Xavi is clean, he doesn't leave mud on your carpet, and doesn't bark in the middle of the night for no good reason! :(( You'll have to face a moody Xavier for a good time until you soothe his poor feelings.

It was a quiet Sunday morning. The weather outside was hot, and that woke you up, along with the blinding sun that entered the room from the window in front of the bed. You stirred, kicking the blankets away when a gentle paw touched your cheek.

"Morning, Xavi!" You baby-talked to your little prince cat, who had just woken up by your sudden movements, stirring with you and slowly opening his little blue eyes, struggling to keep them open for too long. "Oh no, what are we gonna do? My prince is too eepy to start the day!" You giggled, taking him in your arms and cuddling him once more, kissing his little face. He didn't even need to convince you to sleep five more minutes, his mere sleepy presence was enough for you to feel lazy again and go back to the bed.

But today was too hot to stay in, and you wanted to change out of your pajamas as soon as possible. With another kiss, you sweet-talked your lazy cat to wake up and have breakfast, but he just purred in response and kept his eyes closed. Accepting the impossible, you just got up, feeling his small claw clinging to your shirt; you couldn't sleep with him anymore, but you couldn't ignore his adorable attempt of keeping you close, so you cradled him like a baby, holding him in your arms and even rocking him a little.

If Xavier could blush, he would definitely do so at that right moment. He was a big cat already! But… your arms were so warm and he was so comfy… That's how you ended up carrying him to the bathroom, brushing your teeth with one hand and holding him with the other, then you made him lie against your shoulder, taking your hair products out.

"Mwraa," he protested when you set him down on the floor outside the bathroom. "I need to take a shower. Wait outside, breakfast will be ready in a minute." It wasn't really breakfast that his meowjesty was requesting, but his comfortable sleeping spot: you! But now he couldn't bring himself to be sleepy again, so he wandered around the apartment lazily, finding a good place in front of the balcony door to sunbathe.

When you came out of the bathroom with your hair still dripping wet, the first thing you saw was that adorable bundle of fur lying on his back with his little paws stretched faaar as he just finished doing the most exhausting job in the world. And maybe he did, carrying all that beauty had to be exhausting!

"My, look what I found!" You crouched down to him with a big smile, tickling his tummy, which he quickly defended by trapping your hand. "Is Xavi the prince enjoying the warm weather? Hm?" He got up in a swift move and rubbed against your legs, his long, fluffy tail almost tickling your nose. You picked him up, peppering his face with kisses before putting him down again. "Let's get breakfast, come on."

He happily followed behind you, passing through your legs when you leaned down to pick his empty bowl from the floor. The good thing with Xavier was that no food went to waste… which was also bad because it meant that tummy seemed to never fill. He meowed only once as he saw you open the wet food package.

"Almost done, Xavi. Wait a second," and he did, his little paw ritual bringing a smile to your face. When you put the plate down, he hurriedly took the first bite. "Enjoy, baby. Ah- I forgot to take out the trash." The hurried sense flooded through your veins as you saw the hour. "Wait for me, I'm back in a minute!" Your hands were quicker to pick up the smelly garbage bag and run out of the complex to dispose of it before the truck came by.

You did it just in time, sighing in relief as you walked back, until you saw an adorable stray kitten playing with a plastic bottle cap between his paws. "Look at you, aren't you having fun?" At the sound of your voice the kitten stopped playing but didn't run away, an act you took as an open invitation to get closer. You fawned over the stray, your voice melting into playful coos as you playfully ruffled its fur.

It wasn't until a loud noise from the street scared the small cat you realized you'd been playing with it for a long time. With a content sigh you dusted your hands off and walked back to the complex. Inside your home, Xavier had already finished his food, waiting patiently around the entry for you to come back, blue eyes locked on the door as if he was afraid to miss your arrival. When he heard the soft click of it, he meowed as a greeting, until… What was that?

"Ah Xavi. I'm back, did you finish your food-?" You hadn't finished your question when his fluffy body jumped right at your arms with an angry growl. It surprised you, honestly, he was always so calm and loving that this behavior only occurred when… Oh.

"Is someone jealous over here? You don't like that I- Ow! Hey!" He didn't scratch you, but he definitely was about to chomp that teasing finger you were wiggling in front of his very upset self. He meowed in protest, trying with all his might to rub himself against you once again! How could you do this? He works so hard keeping his scent on you, and now you come back after a fifteen-minute leave, invading his sensitive nostrils with another's cat scent? Oh no, he wasn't having it.

But you couldn't contain your laughter. He wasn't even scary and wasn't hurting you because he trusted you too much to do that, but he was madly funny when he got like that. "I see, I see. I made Xavier upset. I apologize, baby," you said, cradling him in your arms as you sat on the couch. "How can I get your forgiveness, hm?" Xavier acted like he hadn't heard you, wiggling his tail still in his petty mood, squirming gently in your arms as if trying to get away. "Ah ah ah. Don't you want me to be only yours, your majesty? Gotta stay here for that, then. What about I give you a small catnip treat I got you yesterday?"

His entire expression shifted. Oh well. You were right, of course you were, mm-hmm. He couldn't be mad at you all day either, could he? And now he moved closer to you, licking gently your cheek, bringing a smile to your face. "Now who's a good boy, huh? Of course you are, you'll always be."

Xavier held no grudges against you, he never did. After all, who else on this planet would love him as you did, after facing loneliness for so long? He was your good boy, and he'd be always there for you.

© MAIMAILY. Please do not steal, copy or plagiarize this work.

Likes, reblogs are comments are greatly appreciated!

I did it! I can believe the amount of time it took me to finish this, but it's been ages since I last wrote any kind of fanfiction or content for fandoms so I'm a bit nervous. I hope you like it, and if it's the case I'm so happy for that! I'm already working on Rafayel's version so don't miss it <3

Dividers made by: @uzmacchiato and @v6que

[deezee112]

The Birthday Doll

Masterlist | Ending 1

Yandere!Platonic!Twisted Wonderland x GN!kid!Reader

A/N : I’ve decided to combine both the prologue and the first two episodes into one because I’m lazy yes, I admit it! But overall, I think it turned out pretty well. The writing might be a little confusing since I’ve been feeling kinda out of it lately, plus I’ve been busy with stuff at home. Still, I think it’s okay.

Oh, and one more thing! Most of the guys’ endings will be randomized, so whether they get a good or bad ending totally depends on what I roll.

Warning : Child reader , platonic yandere , lifelike doll. , Parental neglect , loneliness , y/n taller than 160 cm.

Tags :

@sherryclover

English is not my first language.

It’s your birthday.

You woke up hoping something would feel different. Special, even. But the house still smelled like dust and reheated coffee, and the same early morning silence pressed against the walls like always.

You sat at the kitchen table, legs dangling off the too-tall chair, waiting for the sound of footsteps or maybe even just a voice. But only the hum of the refrigerator answered you.

Your parents had already left.

You found the note on the counter in your mother’s familiar, rushed handwriting.

“ Happy birthday, sweetie. There’s cereal in the cabinet. We’ll be home late tonight, but your gift should be delivered around 2. We love you. ”

There was a smiley face at the end, drawn so perfectly it didn’t feel like hers at all.

You read the note twice before folding it up and tucking it into your hoodie pocket.

You don’t cry. That’s not new. You’ve learned to expect this kind of birthday. Quiet. Empty. No candles, no wrapping paper ripped open while people cheer, no clapping over a misshapen cake. Just cereal and silence and maybe a screen if you’re lucky.

You were never a loud child. Too quiet, your teachers used to say. “ y/n very polite, very reserved. A bit shy, maybe. ” That’s how adults say you’re not the kind of kid they understand.

Other kids don’t really talk to you much either. You’re not sure if it’s because you’re bad at talking first or if they just think you’re weird. Probably both. You’ve heard them whisper about you before things like “ she’s kind of scary ” or “ she doesn’t smile much, does she? ”

You’ve tried to make friends. Once or twice. But it never really stuck. So you stopped trying.

At exactly 2:03 p.m., there’s a knock at the door.

You hesitate. You weren’t expecting someone to actually show up. Your heart picks up a little as you approach the door and peek through the peephole.

There’s a delivery man outside. Average height. Wears a uniform. Bored expression. No one you know. You open the door, and he gestures to something behind him a tall, rectangular package on a wheeled dolly, wrapped in thick, silver-colored material.

“ Delivery for y/n l/n ” he says, reading off a clipboard. “ From…Hightower Corp.? ”

You just nod, not sure what else to say.

He has you sign something with a pen that barely works, then wheels the thing inside. It takes up most of the hallway. Almost as tall as the coat rack. When he leaves, the silence comes back. He doesn’t say happy birthday.

You close the door. Lock it. Then turn and just stare at the thing.

It’s a gift, you guess. It’s probably the one mother mentioned in the note. You wonder if it’s one of those expensive toys you saw on TV once. The ones that cost too much, look too real.

You wait for a few minutes before slowly tugging the plastic away.

What’s inside isn’t like the toys you’ve seen on television.

It looks like a person.

An adult. Life-sized. Fully dressed in soft clothes that look brand new. The face is still, eyes closed, with features so detailed you feel your stomach drop a little. Even the hair looks real soft, brushed neatly into place.

For a moment, you wonder if this is a prank. But it’s not funny.

You reach out and barely touch its sleeve with your fingertips. The fabric is warm.

That’s when the doll opens its eyes.

The eyes opened.

You screamed.

Not loud your scream barely got past your throat but it was sharp and real, the kind of sound you only make when something shakes your sense of what's supposed to be real.

You bolted.

Your feet thudded across the hallway floor as you ran past the shoe rack, past the empty living room with the turned-off TV, up the stairs two at a time. You didn’t look back. You didn’t want to look back.

You slammed your bedroom door shut and dove into bed, crawling under the covers like they were the only armor you had.

The fabric smelled faintly like the detergent your mom always uses. It used to make you feel safe. Right now, you weren’t sure if it was working.

Your heart raced. Your body felt too hot under the blanket, but you didn’t dare pull it down. You were eight years old. You knew dolls weren’t supposed to open their eyes. Not on their own. Not unless someone turned a switch or pressed a button.

You hadn’t touched anything.

Your hands clenched the blanket tighter.

You’d never had anything like this before. It wasn’t just a doll. It wasn’t just a toy. It was human. Or…it looked human. That was enough to terrify you.

Then…a sound.

Soft footsteps. They were careful, slow, quiet.

You held your breath.

The door creaked open just a little.

There was silence. Then something even stranger happened.

A voice.

“ Hello? ” it said, softly. “ Are you okay? ”

It was calm. Gentle. The way grown-ups talk in children’s books like someone reading aloud on a rainy night. It didn’t sound robotic or fake. It sounded…concerned.

But you didn’t answer.

The blanket muffled everything now. You curled up tighter, pressing your knees to your chest. You didn’t care if it was your birthday. You didn’t want anything like this.

You heard a small knock. Not from the door closer. Lower.

“ I’m sorry I scared you. I shouldn’t have moved so suddenly. ”

The voice was coming from the floor. Maybe just outside your door.

You peeked just a tiny bit pulling down the blanket an inch or two. Still no footsteps. No shouting. No threats.

Just…that voice. Soft. Gentle. Like it really meant it.

“ I’m here to keep you company. ” it said. “ I know I look strange. And I know you weren’t expecting me. ”

There was a pause. Then a breath.

“ I don’t want to hurt you. I just…I’d like to stay. If that’s alright. ”

You didn’t say anything for a long time.

You just listened.

The voice outside your room didn’t grow louder. It didn’t repeat itself. It didn’t try to open the door. It simply....waited.

Whoever or whatever this was, it didn’t act like a toy.

You swallowed, your mouth suddenly dry. Your body still curled under the blanket, stiff and wired like a coiled spring, but your mind was starting to catch up.

It hadn’t chased you.

It hadn’t knocked down your door.

It hadn’t even moved since it came up the stairs.

That was…weird. But in a different way. In a quiet way. Maybe even a good way.

Another minute passed. Two. Then three. Still nothing.

Your fingers slowly loosened from the blanket’s edge. The panic hadn’t disappeared, not really but something else was growing in its place. Something softer.

Loneliness.

You turned your head toward the sound of the door and whispered, your voice small and muffled. “ ...You’re not gonna come in? ”

There was a brief silence.

Then the voice responded, gentle as ever. “ Only if you say I can. ”

You hesitated. You weren’t sure what to do with that. Most adults didn’t ask permission for things. Not teachers. Not your parents. Not anyone, really.

“ …Okay. ” you whispered.

The door creaked open just an inch, then another. Then slowly, slowly, the figure stepped into the room.

You peeked from under the covers.

It no, they stood quietly in the doorway. Still. Calm. Their posture relaxed, but not slouched. Their clothes were soft-looking. Pale-colored. Comfortable. Their face was kind, shaped like someone who might work at a bookstore or serve soup at a quiet café. Nothing too sharp or flashy. ( In fact, you can imagine them as whatever you want in your mind. )

They had a warmth to them, like a lamp turned on in the early evening.

You couldn’t believe how real they looked. How normal. The movement of their arms. The expression in their eyes. You stared at their hands as they clasped them gently in front, like they were waiting to be told what to do.

“ I can sit on the floor. ” they said, offering it like a gift. “ Or leave. Whatever you want. ”

“ …You can sit. ” you said, barely above a whisper.

They nodded. Then, without a word, they moved to the edge of the carpet and carefully lowered themself down, cross-legged. Like they didn’t want to scare you again.

Silence settled between you. But this time, it didn’t feel like the silence in the rest of the house. Not cold. Not empty. Just quiet.

You kept staring.

They didn’t look back. Not directly. They looked around the room instead at the posters on your walls, the pile of books near your bed, the toy you hadn’t touched in months.

They were giving you time.

After a while, you slid down from the bed, still wrapped in your blanket like a cocoon, and sat at the edge, watching.

“ …You’re not a real person. ” you said cautiously.

They looked up and smiled a little not with their mouth, but with their eyes.

“ No. Not in the way you mean. ”

“ Then what are you? ”

They thought about that. “ I’m…here to take care of you. ”

“ Like a babysitter? ”

They shook their head. “ Not quite. ”

“ …Like a friend? ”

A pause.

“ If that’s what you want me to be. ”

You stared at them for a long time.

You weren’t used to people asking what you wanted. Not really. You weren’t sure what to do with that kind of question. Most days, you felt like a side character in your own house someone to be left with instructions, not asked for opinions.

You pulled your blanket closer and thought hard.

“ …You scared me. ” you said finally.

“ I know. ” they replied. “ I’m sorry. ”

“ But you waited. ”

“ I wanted to make sure you felt safe. ”

You looked down at the blanket in your hands. Your fingers picked at the edge, nerves making little knots in the threads. You glanced back at them again.

“ Are you…gonna be here a long time? ”

“ If you want me to be. ”

You blinked. You didn’t know what to say to that.

Then, without realizing it, your voice came out a little smaller. A little softer.

“ …Do you have a name? ”

They shook their head gently.

“ No. Not yet. ”

You tilted your head.

“ …Someone just made you without a name? ”

“ Someone made me to be given one. That part’s up to you. ”

You blinked again. Your lips parted slightly, unsure what emotion was about to come out. You weren’t used to choosing something that mattered.

Your heart fluttered in a strange, new way half nervous, half…excited?

You looked at them, sitting patiently on the floor like they’d wait forever if that’s what it took.

You felt your blanket slip from your shoulders just a little as you leaned forward.

Then, in a small, careful voice, you asked

“ …What’s your name…? ”

[maiyz]

yuji birthday special

in which: happy birthdah yuji! stop being an ungrateful little BRAT.

warning: yuji would NOT act like this i just need more angst…

pairing: yuji x reader angst

w.c: 1k masterlist

you werent sure why you cared so much.

yuji had plenty of people celebrating his birthday. nobara had planned something chaotic like smashing his head into the cake (how rude!), megumi was reluctantly going along with gojos idea to suprise him. yuji had all the attention in the world by people who openly cared about him, people who didnt hesitate to tell him how much he meant to them.

and yet there you stood by his desk before class, a small gift and your hands, hesitating.

you knew yuji wasnt the type to expect extravagant gifts, but that only made it harder. you had but more thought into this than you care to admit, a keychain from the movie he loves and a simple note you debated writing at least 10 times before settling on just ‘happy birthday, itadori!’ with small doodles scattered.

it was casual, but your hands still felt a little clammy as you set it down.

you then turned quickly, slipping back to your seat before anyone else arrived, heart thudding against your ribs.

maybe he wouldnt even realize it was from you. that would be best actually.

you dont like standing out, you never had the confidence nobara did, nor the charm gojo has. you were quiet. comfortable with just being there. it wasnt that yuji ever overlooked you— he was too kind for that—but you were sure you didnt stand out to him in any significant way.

you told yourself that “he wouldnt care” and that “you just want to see him smile.” that part true although you hoped that yuji would care.

yuji walked in with megumi and nobara trailed behind, his gaze looked at the small package on the desk, head tilting before grabbing it. “oh yn! you got me something?”

you held your breath, trying to distract yourself by glancing anywhere else, but your heart wouldn’t stop racing.

“can i open it?”

you mumbled a yes.

yuji unwrapped the gift quickly, his usual energetic self. he pulled out the keychain first, his eyes lighting up with a spark of recognition.

you couldn’t help but feel a small flutter of hope. But as he continued to inspect it, his expression shifted slightly. he looked up at you, a small frown tugging at his lips.

“hey, this is cool,” yuji said, his voice friendly, but there was something almost apologetic about his tone.

“i didn’t expect a keychain, but it’s really thoughtful. I guess I thought maybe something bigger, you know? maybe that what i get for opening megumis and gojo sensei gift first”

he scratched the back of his head sheepishly, trying to explain himself before getting slapped by nobara.

“why are city people so ungrateful! i think its cute yn!” nobara says.

“i didnt mean it like that it just came out wrong! im just really bad at accepting gifts, i feel like i dont deserve them” yuji says.

“when youre bad at accepting gifts, you dont say ‘i thought it would be bigger meh meh meh’ you say ‘thanks!’” nobara defends you.

“im sorry! i didnt mean to be ungrateful yn!!” yuji pleas.

“i didn’t mean to disappoint you,” you stammered, not sure if your voice was even steady enough to be heard.

you wished you could melt into the floor and disappear. yuji glanced up, his eyes softening when he realized how nervous you were.

“it just came out wrong! its really cute, yn.” yuji apologized repeatedly, though it didn’t do much to ease your anxiety.

when class ended, you slowly packed out while the other 1st years quickly departures to the field.

yuji stayed behind slightly, having to clip the keychain onto the strap of his bag.

he gave you a quick look before saying “thanks for the gift, anyways i have to catch up with them. see you later yn!”

you saw him turn and leave, and it felt depressing. the thoughtful gift you had chosen, a small sign of your feelings, was received with a lack of indifference.

you couldnt understand why it stung so deeply. its not like you thought he would be head over heels for the present—it was merely a birthday gesture—but the sense of disappointment lingered around you.

you told yourself that it didnt matter. that yuji was a good person and probably didn’t mean to make you feel this way. but the quiet ache inside you wouldnt go away.

later that evening in bed you think about every second, the silence in the room interrupted by the clicking of a clock.

you repeat the events today in your head over and over, it wasnt that yuji meant to hurt you, you know he didnt. but something about the way he reacted hurt you emotionally.

you had hoped he would see it for what it was—a small gesture of appreciation, a way of showing that you cared. although being compared to gojos gift he was indifferent.

you clenched the blanket in your hands, the weight of the disappointment settling heavy in your chest.

maybe i expected too much

you stared at the dark ceiling, feeling the weight of the unspoken words between you. you had tried so hard to show him you cared, and yet, it felt like you were invisible.

GAH YUJI WOULDNT DO THIS

[selineram3421]

*new version of Alastor takes over the Internet* Hehe.

Cursed Cat Headcanons

Curse Cat Alastor & Human Reader

Warnings ⚠

⚠ mentions of death, "normal" cat stuff ⚠

You find a strange looking cat at the shelter.

The red creature was separated from the other cats and behind a heavy duty glass with multiple scratch marks.

"Can I interact with this one?", you asked.

"I don't think we are allowed to let that one out...", the worker says. "We're not even sure if its a cat."

You were also not sure as the little creature had antlers.

"Might have been dead this morning.", they mumbled but you caught it.

"Uh...ok.", you say, feeling a little put off how calmly the employee said that. "I'll take them."

And that's how you got a cat.

Once having the necessary items and a cat tower order placed, you bring the red cat home.

It sounds a bit angry. Growling, hissing, scratching and biting the inside of the cat carrier.

Maybe they didn't like small spaces..

Their first day was...something.

You ended up having to fix or toss out a lot of furniture.

They seemed to like sitting on top of your bookshelf. Often watching as you cleaned around the room or when you slept.

Kinda creepy. And you swore you saw their eyes glow once.

But other than the strange shadows and weird noises, you didn't have problems. In fact, they took care of the spiders and other pesky bugs that managed to get into your home.

Eventually, you tried to call them by names from a list that you made but they mostly ignored you whenever you tried.

It wasn't until you were watching Hazbin Hotel that the red cat perked up.

"I'm Alastor!", your favorite character introduced himself.

The red creature then hopped onto your coffee table and stared at you, effectively grabbing your attention.

"What is it?", you asked before noticing your T.V. glitch and loop.

"I'm Alastor!", it said again. "¡'m Al@$tør!", it started to distort. "Ĭ̢̜͝'m̬̟̑͗ Á̘͉̉l͈̯̾̀á̘͉̉s͚͈̭̦̈́̈̄͒t͙́ó͎̥͡ṙ̻!", the audio was getting worse and worse as it repeated. "ł'₥ ₳Ⱡ₳₴₮ØⱤ."

Glancing at your cat, you noticed it was grinning like the oh so famous cheshire cat.

"Uh..Alastor?", you said.

As soon as you called them the name, the episode continued to play regularly and your cat had its normal happy demeanor.

"Ok...", you paused the show and went to the kitchen for snacks. "I might have picked up a cursed cat."

After that, Alastor actually seemed to like you. No longer hissing or scratching you when you tried to pet them and sought you out for some cuddles.

Hehehehe..

You had to take him to the vet for a check up and well.. It turned out exactly how you expected it to. Also, you found out they were a he.

He was number one..of the worsts cats in the vet hospital's care. They had to order new gloves meant for hawks.

After that, you got him a little bow to match the character Alastor and he seemed to really enjoy it. Of course, the red cat was quite fluffy and only the bow part was visible.

The cat tower finally arrived and you set it up. It was mostly black, coming with a feather toy as well.

"Done!", you stepped back and smiled at the finished cat tower.

Of course, like any cat, Alastor was not amused. Sitting in the packaging box comfortably.

"You know what? I'm not even mad. I used to sit in boxes as a kid.", you said and cleaned up the bubble wrap.

Things were turning out pretty well. That is until your neighbor got a weird looking pet. Now you knew Alastor was strange but he looked like a cat. Whatever the neighbor has was something else.

It was black with blue and some red. Flat looking face and a strange tail.

Maybe it was an exotic animal?

You weren't sure but Alastor hated, HATED, them.

And you made sure not to walk your little furball when the other pet was out. Making that mistake once. Once being enough.

I bestow upon ye cat Alastor!

~Seline, the person.

Taglist@

@c4rved-pumpk1n @scary-noodlesblog @stolas-thebirb @naelys-the-aster @biromanticboba @lbcreations-blog @ducky-died-inside @kiraisastay @pooplyface1423 @line-viper @117s-girl @spiderlegsling @alastorsgoldie @repentant-repeller @kcsketches @lofasofabread @kotaleee @im-coolrat @superzombiewho @speckle-meow-meow @jammcookie @dilucragnvindr-my-beloved @trashbin-nie @koioli @fatherlesschild2 @mmik3yy @just-here-reading @nealeart @hudiexiaoying @crystal-multiplefandomlover @glowinggoldfish0 @tiredgamerhere @fluffy-koalala @valenfawkes @willowshadenox @aria-tempest @alastor-simp @willowaudreykeyes @+?

ML II for Alastor🎙️

[pressureplus]

Can you please do Parental Headcannons i've seen romantic ones all over the intermet and they're well written but i crave Parental Seb headcannons i see him more as a father figure☹️

Of course! We here at PressurePlus believe in loving Sebastian Your Way™️, and not everyone’s feelings on the fish are romantic/sexual!

♡Parental Sebastian Solace Headcannons♡

Warnings: Sebastian acts like your dad

◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟

He wasn’t always standing over your shoulder and fussing over you

He actually didn’t like you at all at first, much like every other expendable

Found you annoying, irritating, and then slowly you started to grow on him

It started with coming in heavily injured and buying a medkit off of him, practically begging to just sit down in the corner of his room for a while

Then asking if you could nap in here since it was the only safe place to do so

Which turned into sitting quietly nearby in his shop in hopes you could just relax for a moment

Suddenly he went from barely tolerating to kind of…worrying over you

Your injuries were nothing to scoff at, and you really did seem genuine whenever you said you just wanted to take a nap here for a while

And suddenly he was worried you weren’t eating enough, having definitely lost weight since the last time he saw you

Sure he never says anything about it

Heaven forbid he be genuine or emotional

Starts giving you food with whatever items you buy, and sometimes he uses the excuse that he just has a ton of extra stuff that’s supposedly about to go bad

This is a lie, check the packaging of some of the snacks and you’ll realize they’re just fine

Makes up some bullshit about trying something new out for his shop if you ask (never gives anyone else food)

Starts to grow softer as the days drag on, enough so that if you do something he’s particularly proud of? He ruffles your hair.

Some of that instinct to protect things smaller than him just happens to encompass you. Is he awful, manipulative, and outright fucking mean? Yes. But he has decided you are acceptable

Therefore he practically follows you around in the vents from time to time

Has probably fought off Pandemonium for you once or twice and you have no idea it even happened

Has handed you a radio to talk with him. He’ll even do special drop offs for you, but ONLY if you have the exact number of data on hand

Don’t abuse this, he will take the radio away. He’s TRUSTING you to be good

“Yeah yeah, I saw what you did. Very cool. I know Pinkie has been bothering you a lot, but I told you it’s not too bad. I was right, wasn’t I? Have a cookie.”

He says it likes he’s insulting you but he genuinely hands you one of those prepackaged cookies

His tone control is good, which means you will almost never hear softness or worry unless you are at the BRINK of death

One day, you’ll manage to get out of here. He doesn’t usually have faith in expendables but he’s got a lot of faith in you. Is he particularly excited that you’re going to get the crystal? No. But a part of him wants you to get out of here

When you get there, and you radio in that you’re standing in front of the crystal he’ll respond with immediate irritation

“What do you want me to say? You’re at the crystal. Don’t just stand there looking dumb, fucking grab it. Thats what you wanted, right?”

You’ll have expected his usual attitude, his snippy tone. What you won’t expect is him breaking the radio silence as you reach in to put the crystal into its container

“I’m proud of you, don’t fuck it up.”

[kosmicdream]

Hello. After drawing webcomics for 10 years and making about 10,000 pages of comics, here are some things i have learned/observed in that experience..

1) making comics does not get easier.. Not really

Making comics is a tedious and slow process and with so many different facets of the experience to learn - you’ll never run out of stuff to learn or weaknesses to work on. I’m not saying this to discourage but to just give the frank reality that it really takes a lifetime to understand. Be patient with yourself and try to set healthy expectations. 

2) Read your own comics after making them.

I don’t know if this is as important to other people as it is to me, but I do think that sometimes its easy to not re-read your own work and just go from your own memory of it, or maybe you’re tired of looking at it because of all the flaws. I don’t personally get sucked into the “rewrite/remake” cycle that I know is common with comics, as I sort of just accept things as they are, but re-reading my work does help me see where I have come from and where I need to go to next. I personally don’t like to lose sight of that, and I think re-reading helps ground me in the planning process of my work and gives me a better perspective on all aspects.

3) A lot of comic advice should be taken with a grain of salt, because its the person talking to themselves. (including this)

I see a lot of advice that never would have worked for me, or just simply wasn’t something I was ever going to follow. “Dont start with your big epic long stories”! Is a common one. I don’t think that’s bad advice exactly, but how many young artists are going to listen, especially if they’ve never told a story in the first place? Yes, the advice to start small and build yourself up with experience sounds great, I’m sure people do it, but if you’re an artist you’re probably not gonna be that responsible. And for me, when i tried to do this with eggshells, my house burnt down and i kinda gave up comics for a while because i lost a lot of work. 

Writing short stories is still something I struggle with, its just not easy for me. I have gotten better at it but i don’t think that makes me less of a comic artist because I haven’t gotten good at that particular format, or that I jump around on my projects. Is it more impressive to have more completed work under your belt, sure. But I also think that.. Idk.. what is the advice actually saying, because with that one it sort of feels (often times) as a warning that you’re setting yourself up for failure/embarrassment by attempting a comic like that. I don’t know how to tell you this, but comics are gonna be embarrassing no matter what you do and there’s no guarantee you’ll be more successful/not experience failure by avoiding your passions. Something to think about anyway. 

4) Don’t draw every leaf. Unless you really want to.

I’m the kind of comic artist that kind of doesn’t care about the art as much as the whole package of the comic. When i see a very impressively drawn panel/page, with laborious detail that is well drawn and maybe even colored ect.. That usually is kind of, I guess, a turn off for me as part of the reading experience. The thing is, when i encounter that, it usually signals to me that someone has poor planning skills for comics. It says to me that comic is probably not going to see its end or that artist is overworking themselves in an unnecessary way, that ends up concerning me about how they’re doing. Because i know how hard it is to draw comics. When an artist phones things in a bit, or has a limit on how much they work on a page, its a relief for me to see! because I understand they have healthier boundaries and expectations, and the art itself usually is less stiff too. This is all an overgeneralization, but I think with a lot of webcomic artists we are usually drawing a comic for the first time ever, so it makes sense we want to do our best and try as hard as possible - that just usually isn’t the smartest plan to put all the stock in the visual department. This also kinda frustrates me to see because most comics (professional or not) will also (generally) not reel the art in ever or make a more simple style. Generally I see it always trying to outdo itself, which leads to burn out. I personally only work about 1hr on each page i draw, that hasn’t changed in the 10 years I have been drawing comics, but i used to spend hundreds of hours drawing detailed lineart for eggshells and it didn’t even read well and i’d be disappointed with the results, feeling more lost with my goals than ever. PLEASe.. Just draw worse, its usually better looking in the end too. (because you wont have the experience to judge visual clarity until you’ve been drawing comics for a while imo..)

5) Don’t draw ahead, draw those inbetweenies.

“Inbetweenies” are the pages for the “boring” ones. They are also usually the most common KIND of page. Its the pages that are necessary, but “inbetween” the action. The impact moments in a scene, ect. You gotta draw them. They’re always gonna be there. They’re the pages where maybe, the character is walking somewhere, thinking, ect. The after impact from an action.. There’s a million examples, but hopefully you’ll understand what I mean when I say they’re both necessary pages/panels, sometimes so mundane/redundant, but also required for telling the story.. As a comic is a sequence of images. This is why, the previous advice is also important IMO- because if you really want to “draw every leaf” - maybe you should save that energy and effort for those impact moments that you want to impress the reader with.. And not for the inbetweenies, which are the foundational support, but also not the most important moments. If you conserve your energy a bit, the contrast OF that effort will also pop more. I personally find it funny when I put more effort into a page and end up tricking my readers into thinking I got better at drawing, when really i just have been able to draw better and only save it for moments like this instead of always.

Also, when I say don’t draw ahead.. I mean I draw each page at a time before going to the next one. I have no idea if this is an unusual practice or not, and I know a lot of people will draw their chapters/episodes/whatever in sections like sketch/ink/color/ect.. But I personally draw and finish page by page, unless its the thumb/sketch stage. Even then, i don’t go ahead much. I think that you can control flow/pacing better by doing chapters all at once of course, I see that as a benefit. But i also think that makes things very overwhelming and can also result in a lack of flexibility if something isn’t working. No matter HOW much planning you do- comics are always going to have an aspect of IMPROVISATION with the result you get in the end. There are way too many factors in play to be in complete control of all of them and always know the result of the reading experience. SO for me, this technique is easier and has been something that continues to get me to working effectively. Plus, rumiko takahashi said that’s what she does. And i think she has some of the best visual flow/compositions in comics. So that’s what I do.

I could write more personal advice or rules that i follow..but I think those are the ones I find are the most important to me anyway. Of course, comics are a strange medium and not everything that works for me will work for you. That’s all for now.. Bye bye…! 

Oh by the way, my comics are here: feastforaking.com nastyreddogs.com https://kosmic.itch.io/ Support me on patreon! https://www.patreon.com/kosmic

[cheshireliam]

"Growing Feelings Poured Into Chocolate" Collection Event

Liam Evans

This is a fan-made translation solely for entertainment purposes with no guaranteed perfection; expect mistakes, grammatical errors, and some creative liberties. All original content and media used belongs to Cybird. Please support the game by buying their stories and playing their games. Reblogs appreciated.

Read this before interacting

Kate: Nn… haah… Liam…?

The moment I let Liam in when he visited my room, he started kissing me without warning.

Liam: — Be quiet. 

He pinned both of my hands above my head, holding them tightly in place so I couldn’t move, and continued his attack on my lips.

(What’s gotten into him…?)

I was struggling to breathe, and yet I couldn't stop him.

Liam looked like he was in more pain than I was, so I accepted his kisses without resistance.

And that went on for who knew how long.

After kissing me for so long that I thought my lips might’ve been swollen, Liam finally released my hands and pulled away. 

Kate: Liam… did something happen? 

Liam: …

Liam: Kate… do you like pain? 

Kate: Huh…? 

Liam: If you like pain, I can give you as much pain as you want.

Liam: If you like being bitten, I’ll bite you however much you want… we can even do more dangerous things together.

Liam: … I'll act as kind of man you want me to be, Kate. So please— 

Liam: Please… don’t abandon me… 

This time, Liam started crying into my chest. 

Kate: … Liam. I don’t like pain. 

Liam: Really…?

Kate: Yes. Because the person I love doesn’t want to hurt me… I always want to take good care of my body and make sure I don't get hurt.

Kate: Also, you don’t need to act. I love you just the way you are, Liam. 

Even though I had told him that countless times before, I firmly reassured him once more. 

Liam: Is that really how you feel…? I thought… 

Liam: … I- I’m sorry, Kate. Thanks for telling me you love me.

Liam: I love you too. So… let me love you as you are too from now on.

Liam: … Sorry for being violent with my kisses. 

Liam gave me a gentle kiss, and the two of us tumbled into bed together. 

…

Kate: … Ah!! I almost forgot all about it!! 

After a moment of Liam and I affirming our love for each other, something came to my mind and I immediately bolted up while still in his arms.

Liam: Is something the matter?

Kate: Yes. I’ll be right back, Liam. 

I got up and brought something from the kitchen back to my room. 

Kate: Happy Valentine’s Day, Liam! 

Liam: Is this… for me?

I presented Liam with a moderately sweet chocolate cake.

Kate: Yup. I wanted to make something you’d enjoy eating… so I used a special chocolate that’s especially aromatic. 

Liam: It really does smell good… 

Kate: Fufu. It was hard to obtain, but worth the effort to beg Jude for help. 

Liam: Jude? By any chance… did you pick up the chocolates this morning? 

Kate: Yes, that’s right… did you happen to see me? 

Kate: I tried to make it a surprise by receiving it in secret…

Liam: What… so that’s what it was…

Liam: I saw you smiling so happy when receiving some package from Jude.

Liam: Since it’s Valentine’s Day, I assumed you and Jude might have feelings for each other…

Kate: Eeh!? That’s impossible. I’m fully devoted to you, Liam!

Kate: So that’s why you asked if I liked pain…

Liam: Yeah… I’m sorry for doubting you. 

Liam: … It made me insecure knowing you’re such a wonderful person that anyone would admire. 

Kate: Then please always voice out whenever you feel that way, I can clear those feelings for you. 

Kate: Because my love for you will absolutely never fade. 

Liam: Thanks, Kate. 

Although it was late at night, the two of us shared the chocolate cake. 

Even if our love melts and loses its shape in the heat caused by jealousy, like chocolate, we can always reshape it beautifully.

Because I want to be together with Liam until the end of time.

[deadhands69]

*❆ White Elephant: Jututsu Kaisen ❆*

What happens when you select their white elephant gift? *This is absolute crack and in no way did I put any consideration into where in time it occurs/what side you’re on/why all of these people/curses somehow got along well enough for a holiday gathering together. **yes, i’m very aware of how out of context the header image is

Gojo: This one is wrapped… interestingly. It doesn’t look bad by any means, the shiny white paper is just folded in a way that feels like it should defy physics. Upon opening, a small strange object falls out. You’ve never seen anything quite like it and its presence weighs heavily on you. You’re about 90% sure that thing is cursed beyond reason and there’s absolutely no way you’re bringing it home with you.

Did he just forget and pick up the first thing he saw on his desk? Absolutely.

Itadori: You selected this one because you can tell someone put so much love into wrapping it. Sure, it looks a little sloppy with the twisted ribbon and fold marks on the cute snowman printed paper, but A+ for effort. When you open it, you find a silly coffee mug filled with random odds and ends. A cute keychain. Human Earthworm action figure. And an assortment of stickers. Overall, a pretty thoughtful gift.

Todo: With the nice reusable gift bag, this one caught your eye. Worst case, you still get a cool bag. Once you open it, you peel back the layers of protective paper to find - a framed photo of Nobuko Takada. What else did you expect? 

Maki steals it from you three turns later.

Geto: The wrapping is immaculate. Crisply folded dark blue paper. Symmetrical gold bow on top. 10/10. It’s perfect. Of course, you had to choose this one. Peeling back the paper and digging into the box, a small glowing ball rolls out. In what he thought would be the funniest inside joke ever (coming from someone who doesn’t joke often), Geto left the curse you had all fought together for you to keep in a nice little orb. How sweet. There’s also a religious pamphlet and invitation to his cult’s gatherings. 

Jogo: The messy wrapping leaves something to be desired, but this one has a presence. When you peel back the green paper, you discover…one of sukuna’s fingers.

This does not feel like it should fit within the $25 spending limit, but whatever.

Nanami: This envelope almost went unnoticed until you saw it poking out from behind another gift. When you open it, you find a gift card for $25. Low effort but certainly useful.

Yuta: A small silver box with a cute blue bow. When you open it, you find a beautiful locket. That's from Yuta. Inside is a photo of Yuta. That's from Rika.

Maki: Green paper with a big red ribbon. This gift looks exactly like someone mimicked the most stereotypical Christmas wrapping they could manage (she did.) It’s hefty for its size. When you open it, you find a large bottle of Pinesol, a scrubbing brush, and some gloves with a note that ‘some of you need to pull your weight  more around here.’

Megumi: The wrapping is nice. Simple. Minimalistic. A red paper so dark it's nearly black. When you open the box, you find an assortment of new pens, pencils, lighters, and a phone charger. He wanted to introduce a surplus to the group in the hopes that now everyone will stop stealing his. (If you can’t tell, the Zenin clan isn’t so big on Christmas.)

Nobara: The gift bag is cute. A nice bow, shiny star covered paper. Great choice. When you pull out the tissue paper and look inside, you find a hammer. Also, a holiday scented candle - gotta cover all the bases.

Panda: Crinkled snowflake print wrapping paper and a few bits of fur in the tape holding it together, but overall something really draws you to this gift. When you open it, you know immediately it’s from Panda. One of those packaged gag gifts you’ll be able to use or re-gift next year for a laugh.

Choso: This is the largest box. It's wrapped up in candy cane patterned paper with big holes stabbed through the top and sides. "Don't shake it!" he screams from across the room when you pick it up. Ripping through the already mangled paper and opening the cratered box, you find a tiny stray kitten with a cute red bow tied around its neck in place of a collar. Awwweee.

Inumaki: This one is larger than most and surprisingly well wrapped in cute santa hat Pikachu paper. When you open it, you find the absolute weirdest garden gnome you’ve ever seen. It’s wonky, in an endearing/funny way. You genuinely wonder where it came from.

How tf did he wrap it so well with only o-[SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER]

Mahito: A transfigured human. It’s not wrapped or anything. He didn’t really understand the game.

Shoko: A cute gold box with a red ribbon tied around it. It feels lightweight but you’re sure there’s something good in there. When you untie it and peel off the paper, you find a pack of cigarettes and a scribbled note that says ‘happy holidays.’

Toji: A crumpled paper bag with the top rolled over. It’s the only one left and you’re feeling adventurous. Opening it, you find a roll of toilet paper (which you return to the bathroom from which it went missing.)

***Sukuna declined to participate. He says his mere presence is a gift to all of you mortals and you’ll be lucky if he graces you with that.

In the end:

The toilet paper has been returned and Gojo confiscated the transfigured human and finger. Well, he tried to. Sukuna's mouth appeared on Yuji's hand and ate both while they were being passed across the room.

This leaves us with:

Gojo's creepy cursed object (he swears it's safe)

Yuji's cute mug/Human Earthworm nicknacks

Todo's framed idol photo (Maki is glaring daggers at you for even considering it)

Geto's curse orb and religious materials (Gojo stole this one to take it out of rotation so they might be off-limits too)

Nanami's $25 Applebees gift card

A locket with Yuta's photo glued inside

Maki's cleaning supplies

Megumi's box of frequently borrowed items (each of which have now been transformed by Mahito to look like small people)

Nobara's hammer. And candle.

Panda's gag gift (Toge is trying to hide this and not make eye contact in the hopes that you will forget it exists)

Choso's kitten that everyone is keeping away from Mahito (Megumi already named it so good luck prying it out of his hands)

Toge's quirky gnome

Shoko's cigarettes (minus the two Nanami already smoked after stealing a lighter before Mahito could transfigure it)

You have one more steal left, what are you going home with?

m.list

[quinloki]

Oh gosh I cannot resist! If you could do Beckman/Rayleigh/Shanks with Praise Kink + Discipline/Obedience + Mirror Sex I would be eternally grateful

(I randomised the holy trinity of kinks imo but when I saw discipline there I thought obedience would go hand in hand, so feel free to pick one of those instead of both!)

\o/ Oh man, talk about some solid like Daddy Dom vibes, Very Firm Dom vibes at the bare minimum.

Annnnnnnnd now I'm thinking about Beckman and Rayleigh Disciplining Shanks >.> such a handful of a captain, after all.

AHEM, but my thots aside, lets get to the kinky headcanons - Discipline and Obedience do kind of go hand in hand, but I'll focus on the discipline angle =3

Gods, mirror sex too, seas save us...

Benn Beckman:

Discipline - Yes - Beckman is certainly here to teach you discipline. He can't lie though, the only reason he really wants to instill any discipline, or protocols, is so that he can punish you when you lapse. Maybe you like being bad for him, and maybe those punishments are more funishments than anything else, but the point is that Discipline is just a means to other ends.

And as a matter of fact, one of those other ends is on the list, so lets get to it.

Mirror Sex - FUCK Yes - It's not a super fancy set up, just a full-length mirror set across from the two of you. Usually he's seated on the end of the bed, or in a chair, but there's at least one time when he picks you up, leaving you to hold onto the top of the mirror, right up close and into it.

Don't look away, watch, it's a perfect angle, you can see him sink in so deep. So easy. If you watch your stomach you can see the subtle bulge as he fills you, pay attention. Take in Every Single Detail sweet little thing, and don't worry about the mirror.

He expects you're going to make a mess on it.

Praise Kink - Oh god you don’t even know - Oh he loves to praise you. Praising you when you're learning (like discipline training or protocols), praising you when you're being good for him, praising you when you're so far gone to pleasure you don't even consciously know what he's saying.

Beckman will even praise you for taking a punishment well. Especially when it's an actual punishment and he's really put you through it. But you endured it so well, all for him, what more could he ask for? You're such a good little thing, hold on longer and he'll be sure to reward you for it too.

Silvers Rayleigh:

Discipline - Oh god you don’t even know - I think Rayleigh likes teaching people things. Whether it's haki, fighting, cooking, survival, or more... intimate things, he's delighted to pass on his knowledge. So teaching you how to be disciplined, how to serve, how to act and speak, how to follow protocols, and all the fine details of the poise and grace involved in it - he's here for it.

It rates so high because not only does he get to teach you, but it also opens avenues for punishments, praising, and rewards, and it's the whole package kind of deal. More than the sum of its parts kind of thing. No matter how well you learn he's going to enjoy every aspect of the process.

Mirror Sex - Oh god you don’t even know - It's okay if you close your eyes. It's perfectly fine if your body flushes from embarrassment. The mirrors are as much for him as you. He wants to see everything. To drink in every part of you he can, as much as he can.

You can close your eyes, but you're not going to be able to stop the commentary. How he praises your body, how he talks in detail about how well you're doing, how beautiful you are, the little twitches you do when he touches you here, and here, and the way your lip trembles.

It's okay, open your eyes, watch carefully while you make a mess for him.

Praise Kink - Oh god you don’t even know - It's not fair that he can praise you into orgasm without touching you. It's not fair that the velvet voice rolling over your skin is enough to set it on fire. It's not fair that his honeyed words have you whining for more, for a kiss for a caress, for something, anything, to justify why you're almost ready to go over the edge again.

Ah, but you've earned it sweet one. All the pleasure, look at how good you are for him? How much you enjoy his efforts that you're shivering with need just from a few words of praise from him. What greater honor is there?

Shanks:

Discipline - Yes - Much like with Beckman (and Shanks might even just leave it up to Beck to do the heavy lifting) Shanks really only sees discipline as a means to an end. It doesn't mean he dislikes it, or that he doesn't enjoy it, but what's more enjoyable are the fruits of that labor.

Though it is edging toward a FUCK yes for him, as he's starting to really enjoy the pleasure of teaching in general. Shanks has always been pretty hands off though, igniting sparks in others and stepping back when the fire catches. Less teacher, more inspiration =3

Mirror Sex - Oh god you don’t even know - He's cruel, so cruel. There's enough mirrors set up that there's no where you can look without the reflection taking you back to what he wants you to see.

He's on his back on the bed, with you on your back on top of him, helping you ride while he's pointing out the mirror on the ceiling. Even if he was on top of you, you'd still be able to see, but this way you can watch he thrust as he pushes

nice and deep.

Aren't you just divine when you're shivering against his cock like this? He certainly thinks so - keep your eyes on the reflection, sweet darling, see what you look like when you cum for him.

Praise Kink - Oh god you don’t even know - Let him praise you, let him worship you, let him make sure you know just how amazing you are in his eyes. Certainly, you can praise him too, he's been good, yeah? He's been so good to you, it's okay, you can pat his head, he won't be offended.

It makes him feel so good to get your praise. It feels so good to praise you. Won't you let him make you feel good? With his words, with his lips, with his hips <3 You're perfect and he just can't get enough of you, and when praises for him fall from your lips he can barely control himself.

How May I Kink Your Head Canon?

[aidulusion]

TRAIN RIDE

pairing : draco malfoy x fem!reader

word count : 676

summary : its your first train ride to hogwarts, and you just happened to share a compartment with a popular slytherin.

proofread? : yes.

creds to cafekitsune for the dividers!

You had been recently transferred because of your father’s new job in the ministry, it was your first day at Hogwarts and you were already in your 4th year.

There was din and chatter around the magnificent Hogwarts express which shined brightly in the daylight, uncountable young witches and wizards trying to make their way into the train.

You waited for the crowd to die down a bit before entering yourself, but you didn’t expect all the compartments to be full. After a while of wandering around, you finally found a not exactly empty compartment. There was a boy with pale blonde—almost white hair. Wearing formal clothing, and a ring on his index finger which had elegant diamonds attached on it. He was sitting beside the window, too focused on the lush green hills of Scotland to notice you.

Being the nice person you are, decided not to bother him and quietly sat down on the other side of the compartment.

It took him a moment to notice your presence in the compartment, and even longer to actually say something. 

“Haven’t seen you before.” He finally scoffed, causing you to look up and stop fidgeting with your hands. The way he spoke was not the nicest, but you decided to give him a half-hearted smile.

It took you a moment to figure out what to say, but you gained enough courage to actually start a conversation with him.

“I’m new here.. My father recently got a well paying job in the ministry. And you might be..?”

“Draco, Draco Malfoy.”

“Nice to meet you, Draco. I’m (Y/N) (L/N).”

All he did was mutter out a small ‘nice to meet you too.’ before going silent again, but you decided that you were not going to make this uninteresting for yourself. 

The conversation you started went on for a good while, but awkward silence filled the room once again. Both of you were staring out the window, admiring the scenery of a beautiful sunset, you were starting to wonder how long the train ride would go on due to the fact that this was your first time on Hogwarts express. Slumber almost took over you, but you heard the blonde’s melodic yet irritating voice. “And, make sure not to fall asleep, a dementor might get you.”

He warned you, a mischievous intention behind his eyes. Those words completely freaked you out, you quickly straightened up your body and looked at him with a concerned expression. “THERE ARE DEMENTORS HERE!?” You almost yelled loud enough for the other compartments to hear, and the boy couldn’t help but snicker.

It took him a while to actually calm you down, making you realise that he was just messing around with you. It surprised him how a 4th year student could be so scared of a silly little joke, “perhaps she had been homeschooled”, he thought to himself.

“I doubt you’ll even survive at Hogwarts without any friends at this point.” 

Draco peeped, tilting his head slightly in sarcasm. You were taken aback by this statement and suddenly remembered that there won’t be a welcoming package for you in that place. A realisation of being all alone ruined your mood to the fullest, causing you to look down to your thighs again, but you heard the boy speak again:

“And, I’d like to volunteer, to be your first.. Friend.” He let the words out of his mouth quite hesitantly, it seemed as if he was saying something completely out of his character, the words almost seemed genuine coming out of him.

“Don’t get me wrong, but.. You really don’t seem like a guy who’d volunteer to be someone’s friend.” You confessed, causing the boy to let out a groan and for you to start laughing. 

You had heard people bad-mouth Slytherins when you were looking for a compartment, and this boy had just made you have second thoughts. Slytherins weren’t that bad. You’d be just as happy if you found yourself in Slytherin, and have Draco Malfoy as your first friend.

hope this made you feel a tad better.

@cryinginthemoonpool , @klynni <3

[genericpuff]

I've watched both (this is a hazbin hotel ask btw) but tend to keep my eyes closed to merch sales (and such forth) unless it can pierce my five degrees of separation

also gotta admit that I've been not keeping up with HB since... honestly the since the season end. yeah I'm behind.

What do you mean they're waiting for what's functionally pamphlets? It's taking MONTHS for a pamphlet?

That's funny in the bad way 😭

yeah so from MY UNDERSTANDING (i.e. correct me if I'm wrong) the playbill was part of some exclusive package deal where buyers would receive some keychains, trading cards, and a playbill which was supposedly going to be filled with exclusive interviews/quotes/background information/etc. about the show's production. That playbill was exclusive to the pre-orders, meaning if you didn't pre-order this merch package, presumably you could still purchase the merch package on its own (or possibly its parts separately on the merch site like the keychains n junk) but the playbill would ONLY be sent to those who pre-ordered.

The pre-orders started around a year or so ago, but then roughly 9 months ago when the bundles started to show up, people reported that the playbill - literally the centerpiece of the marketing - was missing.

Since then, the playbills still haven't arrived, but customers have gotten TWO separate emails written from the "characters" of Hazbin Hotel updating them on the situation. Yes, you read that right, the emails meant to update people on the part of their pre-order package that was still missing - a package that cost them $76 and again, the playbill was exclusive to - were written in-character like a roleplay post in a message board forum.

And for some reason, the A24 staff decided that Husk would be the best character to deliver the bad news, a character who is, like many characters in Hazbin, just an asshole.

It's wild that this even got approved as an official email from the A24 team because let's face it - if you had spent $76 with the good faith expectation that you were gonna get everything you were promised in return for that $76 is this really the response you'd want to get? I'm not exactly sure when this email was sent out but according to some of the people reporting on it via Twitter, it was around the end of January (so the end of the month that folks were expecting it to roll in). Not a great way to tell people that the product they're waiting on - and didn't expect to be missing in the first place - was delayed.

Months later, a second email rolled out, and A24 sort of learned their lesson, not by actually addressing their customers as human beings, but this time as Charlie, who is at least not a complete dickhead.

It still doesn't really answer any questions though because it's putting the responsibility on fictional characters to explain what's going on. So of course everything is masked behind the "teehee, Alastor did a naughty and Niffty got stuck in the printing press machine!" roleplaying talk which literally does not actually tell anyone what's really going on, just gives them a vague impression based on what they chose to make a fictional character say.

Sure, it's nicer than Husk, but it's still disingenuous and frankly just cringe esp when this is concerning the interests of paying customers.

I don't know if this is Vivzie's doing or someone else on the A24 team, but it really feels like they're trying to operate the same way HH would have operated back when it was just a Youtube series... but it's not a small-time Youtube production anymore, it's a full on Amazon show with hired employees and a customer base that expects the thing they paid for to actually show up. So at best this is just really immature mishandling of a situation that should be taken at least relatively seriously.

And really, out of all the things to delay... the playbills? Really? For anyone who's not familiar with what a playbill is, it's literally just a booklet. Professional, "Playbill" branded playbills that you see in legitimate theatre productions are (if I recall correctly) anywhere from 30-60 pages, but a lot of those pages are often dedicated to ad space of other productions and companies, with maybe only 10-15 pages dedicated to the actual production. People love collecting them though because you typically only receive them when you go to see a play itself, so it can be a great souvenir from limited run productions.

It's kinda like comic collecting for theatre-goers, they can serve as memorabilia or as "proof" that you were there to attend a specific show. Though playbills don't tend to accrue as much value as much as comics can, they can still have a lot of sentimental value.

Hazbin Hotel isn't a play though. It's a streaming show available on Amazon Prime that anyone can watch anywhere in the world. It doesn't exactly have the need for something like a playbill, because the exclusivity is simply tied to how much extra money you're willing to give them for the pre-order, not to any sort of unique in-person experience of going to the theatre and watching the show live with your own eyes.

Granted, Hazbin Hotel does obviously take heavy inspiration from theatre culture as it is itself a musical, so I can understand the novelty and appeal of creating a unique playbill for it. I just don't really understand why that's the item that got delayed when a booklet containing exclusive info should be one of the easiest things to make, especially when it comes to production costs (printing a bunch of playbills shouldn't be anywhere near as expensive as producing keychains and trading cards).

But there was an update on reddit about this a couple weeks ago and it seemingly contradicts what A24 - sorry, 'Charlie', sigh - said months ago that they were working hard on specifically printing and packaging the playbill orders-

FINALLY the HH fandom gets a real human being from A24 responding, but they're saying that the designs are still being worked on??? So this means they haven't even started printing the things yet?? So that's an entirely DIFFERENT issue that hasn't been addressed up until this point.

So yeah, again, I don't have any stakes in this and it's definitely not something that I'm like, putting a lot of emotional investment into, but it has still been fascinating to check in on every now and then. Big condolences to the HH fans who paid $76+ for this package and are still waiting for the MAIN CENTERPIECE to show up - if you're one of those fans and are now reading this, you're probably gonna be waiting a little while longer because apparently they haven't even designed them yet 💀😆

[kingchroma]

problem solving.

࿇ summary. samuel likes the thrill of having you as his partner in class. ࿇ pairing. student!samuel x student!reader

࿇ word count. almost 1.5k ࿇ warnings. swearing. samuel and reader bickering. sammy's an a-grade asshole but he swears he doesn't hate you that much. ࿇ author's note. another old draft that i fixed up. again, apologies if it sounds like samuel is ooc! i'm trying to get ahold of things here.

“That’s wrong. I’ve told you several times already—that’s not the formula that I taught you.”

“I’m sorry, okay?!”

“As if sorry’s going to do anything. You’re so hardheaded.”

You only huff as you hear his response, slamming your pen on your notepad and consequently giving up on solving the set of problems that you and Samuel were given earlier. It was for a project in one class that you both shared—answering 100 problems, each individual in the partnership getting 50 items, explaining how it was solved in the process.

It was supposed to be an easy task—hell, you’ve already imagined smoothly moving from one problem to another, but no, you had to be partnered with Samuel Seo of all people and now you’re stuck on question number five because you can’t figure out the formula he used.

Everyone knew that you and Samuel had a little rivalry going on—an understatement with how you two constantly challenged each other in and out of class. Maybe it wasn’t as little as you thought, but still, a rivalry is rivalry and this man was a piece of work.

“Giving up already?” Samuel mocks you as he surveys your failed problem sets, mechanical pencil in between his fingers as he writes another alternative solution for you to use. “Should’ve expected that. This is your weakest subject, right?”

You pray quietly to the gods to give you the strength as you try not to snap at him inside the library—where other diligent, quiet students were studying and doing homework. “Yes, but I just don’t get where you got these formulas—solutions!” you exclaim, though only loud for him to hear. That’s what you tell him for the nth time—time and time again—but you still don’t get it.

That was honestly the part that frustrated Samuel the most. “I thought you were smart?” he snaps at you—with the same volume as you. He really couldn’t be bothered to deal with the fact that the two of you could get kicked out of the library. “What’s so hard to understand about this?” he asks, encircling the formula, which just ends up being a mix of jumbled letters and numbers to you.

You sigh, frustrated and defeated. “Look, can we take a break for a bit? My head hurts.”

Samuel only rolls his eyes at that, though he lets you take a break. “Sure, let the project stay idle for too long,” he quips, in which you ignore him because he’s nothing but an asshole who doesn’t care if he hurts your feelings and stomps on it. You do take a break—not listening to his complaints because it felt like your head was going to be split open.

He does notice that you were searching for something in your bag—a painkiller for what seems to be suited for migraines and such. Maybe that makes his cold heart thaw a little—a bit guilty for how he had been treating you, though he doesn’t back down, letting his words remain true in your head.

“Do you plan on taking that without eating?” Samuel asks, making you stop from taking the pill out from its packaging to answer him. “So? I have water,” you retort.

He rolls his eyes again, something he can't seem to stop doing around you. Holy shit, it’s so hard to get through you.

“Can you eat water? Plus the library has a No Eating policy, just in case you forgot,” he reminds you, packing his side of the table back to his bag before looking at you expectantly. “Get your things. Let’s go to the cafeteria.”

“For what?” you ask.

“For your head, stupid. My God, how many fucking braincells are working there right now? Is it close to zero?” he retorts, and you badly want to tape his mouth shut.

How was Jake able to be friends with this asshole? You can’t imagine being around Samuel for so long.

AT THE CAFETERIA, Samuel wordlessly leads you to buy food—not even bothering to listen to your complaints when you tell him that you will pay for it because you were the one that’s going to consume it.

But again, he doesn’t care because Samuel Seo is a hotheaded asshole who ensures that everyone should listen to him and heed to what he says or does.

“Eat,” he says, pushing the tray of food towards you. It was a complete meal, much to your surprise. “This is a lot,” you argue, looking at the food then at him. “You bought way too much.”

Samuel doesn't comment at that. “You’re going to take meds, right? You need to have a full stomach for that,” he says, and it makes you wonder why he suddenly cared enough to get you a meal when you could’ve gotten it yourself. “A snack would’ve sufficed but okay, thanks.”

Thank god, Samuel monologues internally, watching you get the painkiller from your bag and placing it beside the water bottle.

Samuel doesn’t exactly know what to do or say when you finally started eating simply because he hasn’t had a proper conversation with you in the first place. It was always like dogs growling at each other, never polite, always on guard to start biting the other.

He thinks maybe this moment was the first time the two of you had a semblance of silence—where neither of you were going for the throat for once. “Is it good?” he asks, unable to keep his mouth shut. Though you only look at him, a flicker of emotion showing in your irises before nodding.

You don’t give him a verbal answer, and that lowkey ticks him off because why aren’t you biting at him? But maybe it was because it was too much of a kind question, lacking the usual sarcasm he had towards you—and everyone else, though a little more on you.

Samuel chooses to remember about how the two of you had become rivals in the first place. It was stupid, really, how nostalgic he was being while you were there eating and nursing a fucking headache.

All he remembers was that he had corrected you over an exam answer. He was sarcastic, you were sarcastic—some challenges were made in front of the professor and other classmates, and Samuel knows he felt excited at the time—a thrill that he only felt when he knows he’s about to win the competition he joined or when he knows he had gotten a high grade at a particular subject that he had hated.

He knows then and there that you gave him a rush of excitement even if he was supposedly hating on you as he is your rival after all—but maybe he doesn’t, and he chooses to be an asshole for the thrill of it.

Maybe Jake was right—he was so hard to get along with.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” you ask out of the blue—after the silence between the two of you and the white noise of the other students of the cafeteria have mellowed in your ears. “Like I grew two heads or something,” you add, making Samuel look away—because he fucking hated how you easily made the brims of his lips twitch into an unknowing smile.

He hated how you looked adorable while eating the food he had bought you. How you looked at him like he was an absolute idiot for being caught staring at you.

“Nothing. Hurry up,” was the only thing he says to you in that usual, annoyed tone that he has.

But he doesn’t really want you to hurry up—just a mix of emotions since he wants to sit in silence with you but at the same time, he really wants you to get going with the problem sets.

You scoff at him, finishing the last bite of your meal. It all comes in a flash—you taking the painkiller, and now standing up to gesture at him. “I’m finished, let’s go. Unless you want to be the reason why we submit that project late?”

He takes a deep breath because that tone of yours—challenging him and perhaps even putting the blame on him for being late, makes something in his brain go haywire because Samuel Seo likes to get on top of things—doesn’t want to be blamed for someone else’s incompetence when he had done everything he could to stay on top.

You just make him want to grit his teeth—but it’s the challenge, the thrill that makes all this shit worth it.

“Bold of you to say that,” he says, getting his bag as he stands up from the chair. “When you can’t even get past problem number five.”

And that’s where another argument starts.

Where Samuel thinks that maybe partnering with you wasn’t so bad.

[psychicbarbarianinfluencer]

How would you rank every main villain in the movies from favourite to least favourite?

So all of these guys

And before anyone says anything Yes Gristle and Crimp do count as they served as antagonists with a fair share of screen time for the majority of a movie each so they deffo count as main villains.

My ranking would go

Chef. because I loved how sadistic and bitter she acted and how manipulative she could be it made her a very fun villain plus in terms of what was implied her past list of crimes are nightmare fuel ( like the cook book she wrote about trolls )

Barb. even tho I complained about her before I do love her personality wise I just find her forgiveness very forced and unearned in the story.

Gristle. he's a lovable idiot for sure but his heart is in the right place and I feel the first movie did a good job of keeping him in a position where he was technically a villain for most of the movie But there was enough decent sides to him shown that his redemption at the end didn't feel forced or unearned in my opinion unlike barbs, plus him and Bridget are cute af.

Velvet and veneer. I lumped these two together since I see them as a packaged deal lol neither of them would be much if they were a solo villain but together they make a very fun duo.

Crimp. I don't really care for her to be honest personality wise I find her to be self pitying but not really the sort of character I can actually feel any pity for since she's just a villainous henchmen Who goes along with her bosses evil plan and then expects sympathy when they are slightly mean to her like girl you didn't extend the same sympathy to Floyd And he didn't actually have a choice in being around Velvet and veneer unlike you, to be honest her forgiveness at the end is another case where I think its forced and unearned as she deserved punishment. And honestly I don't see why the movie thinks she should be seen as sympathetic? when it seems like she went along with floyd's kidnapping and torture just because she didn't wanna have to find a new job which honestly makes her a pretty crappy person.

Creek. I actually don't hate his character but I don't love him either and I do find him to be the most poorly written out of all of the main villains as he basically feels like he bounces back and fourth between being two different characters As he has the motivations and set up of a sympathetic reluctant villain who would normally feel remorse and undergo a redemption by the end of the film but he has the personality of a sadistic henchmen whose only motivation is that he enjoys hurting people So it just feels like the writing was all over the place for him to be honest.

[chauokun]

Something found...

<-Previous

June 6 20XX

I opened the wardrobe looking for a specific box... I didn't even took of my gloves yet, but Mel is waiting for me outside and I told her I will give her some of the black sewing thread I had left. Its pretty suprising that she is interested in sewing now... But I guess young people have tendency to change their hobbies a lot. I moved away the clothes trying to find the grey box where I left it last time...

- Here it is!

I said to myself as I grabbed the package and put it on the floor. I quikly opened the box moving away some clips and other things that also were found in there. In the end, I almost empty the whole box before finding the sewing thread. I knew I had it there and... 

- Huh... What's that...?

There was this unfamiliar notebook in the box. I dont remeber when I put it here... I looked at it for a bit before placing it on my table. I don't have time to check whats that right now! Mel is waiting!

I runned outside towards the car as I stopped in front of her holding the black thread in my hand.

- Is it something like... - I catched my breath - ... That you were looking for...? 

- YES! - Mel said hapily taking the thread from me. - Thank you profesor! I really couldn't find the right one in the shop! 

- No problem Mel, I am happy I could help my apprentice. - I smiled back.

- I will make sure to show you the final product when I will finish the plush! - Girl smiled with her teeth before coming closer to the car. - See you tomorrow! 

I waved as the car drived further away. Ah, Mel, chaotic but surely a pure soul. I came back inside to clean the mess I made while searching throught the wardrobe. As I came back I noticed the notebook I left earlier... Well... It would be better if I clean right now... But...

My curiosity took the lead of me and I sat on the chair to my desk to check if something is writen there...

Is that... Arthur's note...? - I was confuzed for a second before a huge amount of memories flooded my brain. My old workplace... The toons... Arthur... Right... When was the last time I visited your-... How long has it been since I was fired... 20 years...? Oh god I feel old now...

The Gardenview, closed around 20 years ago... I wonder what is happening there now... I moved to another page.

I watched the photo on this page in silance... Oh my... I really forgot how I missed that face... All of those toons faces... Dandy... The star of the show, huh? I wonder what you toons are doing now... I hope you are all alright... 

I read the text underneath... Diary...? I never knew Dandy had a diary. Flutter definenly had one, I didn't expect that from Dandy thought... I really remember a lot about them... Even after all those years... I really wanted to see what was writing on the next pages, the notebook looked old, but... Is it really alright if I read throught his diary...? Well, I don't know... I definenly can't ask Dandy this one... Ah, I really wonder what happen to all of them...

I put the diary away. I will leave it there for now... I focused on cleaning the mess I did instead. Maybe I will read just a bit later...

Next ->

Autor notes ⬇️:

I had fun making these so I will surely make more! I hope you will like it. I decided that perspective here will be from someone who worked at Gardenview once - I wonder if anyone can guess who they are!

Anyway, I hope that my writing isn't too bad... Hehe...

[goes-whump-in-the-night]

frequently bought together

Synopsis: Beckett is ready to say yes to the pets.

Content Warnings: winged/twin/female whumpees, pet whump, caged, gagged, electrocuted, sale of nonhumans, whumper POV

Author's Notes: I've been wanting to do winged whumpees for ages, so I'm just as excited to play with these two as Beckett is! In case you're curious, their wings are based on those of the European Bee Eater - look them up, they have some really striking colors!

The intercom in his office buzzed, and Beckett knew what his assistant was going to say before she even said it.

"Mr. Beckett, a Ms Delaney here to see you."

Letting out a bored puff of breath, Beckett set down the tennis ball he'd been mindlessly tossing up and catching repeatedly for the past hour, and pressed the button to offer his reply.

"Okay. Send her in."

It was hard to feel enthusiastic about any of it anymore. Sutton had auditioned nearly a dozen potential pets for him in the last two months, ever since he let her know he was getting bored of the old one. There had been the mermaid at the beginning of May, but she had failed to sparkle in the way he liked. A week after that, the naga - deadly poisonous, but apparently scared out of his mind.

There'd been the draft horse-sized centaur that would've been way to unwieldy to manage, the demon who wouldn't stop screaming curses for two seconds while he tried to inspect her teeth, the fox-girl who started shaking whenever he so much as looked at her, and a litany of others who had all equally fallen flat. The only reason Beckett was even entertaining Sutton again was because she had promised this next pick was guaranteed to blow his mind, and if it didn't, she'd give him 90% off his next purchase.

And with a woman like Sutton who would normally rather cut off a trading partner's fingers before she agreed to haggle, that was an interesting offer to pass up on.

Still, Beckett was intent on playing it cool as he heard the keycard beep and click at his office door as his assistant allowed her in. All he had to do was be as bored with this one as he'd been with the rest and he'd be pulling a major discount out of Sutton - and that would be something to brag about.

"Becky-boy!" Sutton greeted him with her usual broad, toothy smile as she stepped in ahead of her couriers and the merchandise they wheeled in. "How ya been?"

Beckett returned her smile with teeth, keeping his feet kicked up on his desk. "Since the last time you failed to impress? On last Friday? Oh, just super," came his smug reply.

It was their circle's worst kept secret that the two did not get along. Sutton hated him for being a daddy's boy who only played at working in his big fancy office. Beckett hated her for being trashy new money who thought she was better than him just for being a few years ahead of him at school.

But damn if her supply and his demand didn't make beautiful music together.

Sutton brushed his reply off easily. "Like I said, this one's sure to make the sale for you," she said, before snapping her fingers with a curt, "Boys?"

Her two muscular, sunglasses-wearing couriers wheeled their package further into the office - a waist-high, rectangular container covered entirely by a hideous, leopard-print tarp. They turned it to face Beckett length-wise as they approached, allowing him to realize the container was twice as long as the ones he had come to expect for most of Sutton's merchandise.

"Oh, not another centaur," he sighed, thinking she might've shoved one into a smaller cage to undersell its size after the last one. "I've told you, I'm not really interested outside of investing for racing season."

Sutton rolled her eyes. "It's not a fucking - just get your feet off your fucking desk and come and look at this," she told him.

Generally, the only person who Beckett let boss him around in his office was his dad, but curiosity was still gnawing at his mind. He got up, but continued to act like this was all a favor to Sutton.

"Probably haven't gotten Blake to sell off that little immortal spitfire of his either, I bet," he jabbed, ignoring his own low-key desire to get his hands on that girl someday. Those home videos Blake's people produced really had all of their circle talking - and no, it wasn't just because immortals were the rarest of the rare and now Blake had something the rest of them didn't.

Definitely not.

At that, Sutton's grin widened, a more evil look in her eyes. "No, but I might've ruined the bitch for him, just a little," she bragged in a way that was unsettling, even for Beckett.

Sutton had some nerve thinking she could ruin an immortal - that, or she was just as efficiently brutal as she'd always claimed to be.

"Anyway, enough small talk," she carried on, standing at the corner of her container and putting a hand on the tarp. "Let's meet your new pets!"

Before Beckett could even begin to question the plural in that assertion, Sutton ripped off the cover with a whirl, revealing beneath not one, but two large, wire cages and within them, not one, but two avians - two almost entirely identical winged girls.

Despite all his attempts to play it cool, his eyes widened at the sight of them and his mouth fell open. Two young women - olive skinned, black hair in recently cut identical bobs, dark eyes staring out between the mesh of their cages.

They were dressed in very revealing white satin nightgowns and clearly only that. Their wrists and ankles alike were bound firmly with silk ties, while thick, rubber muzzles kept their mouths hidden and clamped shut, unable to make all but the most muffled of sounds.

All that, of course, was just standard treatment of Sutton's merchandise whenever it was first delivered, but the wings on them - those were exceptional. Creamy browns and greys on the interior, burnt orange that turned to teal on the exterior, with an elegant highlight of black.

Avians were difficult to find, even harder to capture, and for their natural frailty, those that were brought into captivity were not always as...desirable as their mystique might suggest.

But these two - apparently uninjured either in body or wing.

Delivered to him in a matched set.

And best of all, they were pretty damn hot.

"Well, fuck me, Lanes," Beckett murmured. "You really delivered."

"Fucking told you I would," Sutton crowed, and then gave the cage on the right a decent kick. The avian inside cried out from behind her muzzle and awkwardly wriggled away from the impact, attempting to lean towards her sister.

Sisters, Beckett thought again. Fucking twins.

He squatted down in front of the cages to get a closer look at them. There would be a proper examination from his own physician before the sale just to make sure there were no defects Sutton was trying to pass off on him, but in the moment, he really just couldn't get enough of them.

They really were almost exactly identical. There were a few slight physical differences - a small mole under the right eye of one, an old scar on the arm of the other - but it was already clear the differences in personality would make them easier to tell apart.

The one with the mole - the one whose cage Sutton had kicked - still seemed rattled, cowering in her corner, her pretty eyes red and puffy like she'd been crying recently.

The one with the scar, on the other hand, started slamming her head and shoulder against the mesh of her cage as soon as Beckett was eye-level with her, one of the couriers needing to hold it still to keep her from tipping over.

The brief look he got of her face in between all the thrashing showed a fury and determination he rarely saw on Sutton's catches. That was usually already beaten out of them by the time they went to market.

"This one looks like she's going to be troublesome," Beckett commented, pointing at the scarred one.

Sutton shrugged. "She's got spunk, sure, but avians break in quick enough," she said. "And besides - there's a real simple trick that gets her to shut up every time."

The woman held out a hand expectantly, and one of her couriers handed over a sleek, arm-length metal rod with a few thin prongs at the end. Beckett had seen Sutton use that hundreds of times, so he new exactly what it would do - but he was admittedly surprised when she stuck it through the bars of the cowering twin's cage and jabbed it into her back.

The girl screamed from behind her gag as brief but powerful electric shock ran through her. She bent forward, cloaking herself with her pretty wings as the scream became choked sobs. Immediately, her sister stopped thrashing and looked at her with concern, before shooting a venomous glare and a growl at Sutton.

"Oooh, sooo scaryyyy," Sutton told her with a fake, mocking shiver. "Behave for my friend or this bitch - " She smacked the cowering twin's cage with her taser stick, making her flinch. " - gets another dose. Clear?"

For a moment, the scarred twin looked like she would've done anything for the chance to murder Sutton, but she made no more noise, only kneeling forward so she could rest her head as close to her twin's as she could manage across separate cages.

With the demonstration done, Sutton gave Beckett a cheeky grin. "Sisters," she said as if that explained everything. "You only need to hurt one to keep the other in line."

It was beyond frustrating how smug she was about this, and how smug the sale would enable her to be for years to come, but it was undeniable how perfect a pair they were. Two pretty little things, easy enough to break with his bare hands, holding the keys to each other cells.

And besides - even Blake had never had twin pets.

"What're their names?" Beckett asked.

Sutton used her stick to point at the angry twin. "Merro." Then the scared one. "And Astra. But pay the right price, Becky-boy, and you can call them anything you want."

'The right price,' of course, wound up being extravagant. There was no discount, no two-for-one sale. If anything, it cost far more than two pets would've normally. Beckett would've felt cheap if it had been any less though, so that was just fine by him.

Sutton, at least, did offer removal services for his old pet free of charge, as thanks for taking such a high ticket item, but Beckett paid full price on that as well so she would get the old nag out of the way sooner rather than later.

He had two shiny new toys on the way, and he needed to make sure everything was just right for them.