#and i was getting ready for bed and saw my chest tattoo (awake & unafraid).
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ohhhhhhh i feel an mcr kick coming on..........
#was thinking a lot after therapy today about things and how I want to live these next couple of years i might have.#and i was getting ready for bed and saw my chest tattoo (awake & unafraid).#and just damn. it feels so profound to me every single time i REALLY sit and pick that song apart.#like. i was about to move to a state 1000 Miles away from everything i ever knew for cancer treatment#and decided the one big tattoo commitment i wanted was the neck moth and the bp lyric#and now I'm just like. i somehow knew without knowing ANYTHING about the 1.5 years since then.#it's true though. it's how i want to be. i want to be here. in the present. awake. and unafraid.#just living right now and walking this path until the end. without holding onto fear with a vice grip.#i don't wanna be afraid to keep on living. knowing that every day marches me closer to my death.#i just want to live for the time i have right now.#Even saying it now my chest gets tight and my stomach drops#knowing that I'm going to have to let go of control and let the universe reclaim my soul#but my soul won't die. my soul is alive. it isn't sick. my body is. so at the end. my soul wil transcend.#no need to sit and live based on the fact that my body is dying. i need to keep moving forward#knowing that my soul is alive.#chatter#round 2
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