#and i think the only other fandom i have an interesting (?) au for is zero escape because

[transannabeth]

oughhhhhhhh i miss doing ask blogs

[les-gnossiennes-fantomatiques]

An Unorthodox Fic Recommendation

Hey, everyone.

So I’d been wanting to write this post for a while, but I’d had a hard time finding the words to articulate my exact feelings for a good long while now. But in the spirit of the holidays, goodwill towards all, and so on and so forth, I’ve somehow managed to catch my breath.

I dipped pretty suddenly from fandom earlier this year for multiple reasons, most of which fell under the umbrella of a very real and very unfortunate truth: I was sick. Stupid sick. And fandom, while obviously not the only thing contributing to this by a long mile, was not conducive to me getting better.

My drinking, you see, had gotten bad in a way that is honestly humbling to think about now; it was at levels that were both physically and mentally dangerous and unsustainable. Moreover, it was beginning to affect the people I love most in this world. And, unfortunately, pounding back a glass, a bottle, two bottles of wine, hey maybe I can run to the gas station for a few mini bottles of whiskey to end the night went hand-in-hand with writing and my fandom experience in general.

I won’t go into the details of my actual rock bottom, besides that it hit in March of this year and that I’m grateful it was relatively minor compared to many of the stories I’ve heard in my recovery journey. But suffice to say, I checked into rehab and everything had to go on the back burner from that point on. I’m lucky that I had the unwavering love and support of my husband, my family, my work, and my friends (including a bunch of people I’ve met through this fandom specifically--put a pin in that) to start down that path, because all the same, it has often been a very lonely, very dark, and very isolating place to be. But so is addiction.

So here I am, hours and hours of group counseling, enough EMDR therapy to relive every childhood trauma in the book, countless tweakings of my meds, endless bottles of Coke Zero later, and I’m almost ten months sober.

And I find myself asking now what?

One of the biggest challenges in early sobriety, you learn quickly, is redefining fun for yourself in a world without your substance of choice, without the very thing that feeds your ego and silences your self-criticisms, without what feels like the only thing propelling you from one bleak day to the next. And for a long time, I worried that fandom had stopped being fun. That the joy of writing had been permanently ruined by the associations I’d made with drinking and negative related experiences.

But, back to my fandom friends. I worried so much they would lose interest in me as a person--that I’d become too boring or depressing or unfun in this next leg of life to want to stick around. I’ve found the opposite to be true--from the countless yapping sessions up and down 8th Avenue and booze-free hangouts, to the endless DMs of advice and memes, to the long heart-to-hearts over pots of tea, to… watching whatever the fuck is going on in the David Staller version and having a good long laugh. I didn’t expect this coming into 2024--I don’t know what I expected, honestly, besides maybe the hospital and divorce papers and more loneliness--and leaving this year behind me knowing I’ve got that means the world to me.

So all this is to say, one of the other things that helped me pull through this challenging period of life has been, surprisingly enough, fan fiction.

Particularly Battered Dove by BattyDings.

Modern AUs are always really hard to pull off, at least to me, in a way that feels satisfying. (This is why I am a coward and don’t write them lol.) More often than not, there’s a tendency for the story to get caught up in retrofitting the more melodramatic, antiquated elements (I say this with love) into a world where they can’t really exist with a straight face, and often at the cost of the characterizations and plot. The best modern AUs, for me, lean into the framework of what is there thematically: the ideas of loneliness, manipulation, dependency (themselves all negative aspects of addiction) balanced against the possibility of redemption, love, and making amends.

And in Battered Dove, BattyDings has rather brilliantly transposed these things into the context of substance abuse and addiction. If Phantom is a story about two lonely broken people getting caught up in a shared passion that brings out the best and worst in each other (particularly Erik lol), then Battered Dove sees our dynamic duo thrown together by a mutual past in drugs and hopefully redeemed by the music they make together.

It’s often a hard and unflinching read, and one that in other hands could easily come off as crass or edgelord-y. But in Batty’s hands, Battered Dove is a thoughtful, sensitive, tender unraveling of the Erik and Christine dynamic that keeps me coming back: that is, the only way they can “get well” is by going through something that is arguably more painful and terrifying than the present reality they live in: giving up what they think they love most.

I’ve read this story multiple times over the years and was always tremendously moved by the simple but powerful interpretation laid out in this fic; in pre-contemplation, when I’d be crawling into bed drunk every night and wondering if this was how I was going to die, bits and pieces of it would come to me. Me in bed, on the verge of blacking out, thinking about Phantom of the Opera fan fiction, wondering if I could do better (nah, no, I couldn’t. Not me.) Rereading Battered Dove for the first time after starting rehab and getting well into this journey was all the more astounding.

Phantom of the Opera, for me, is not the story of a monster who brutalizes women and we’re somehow supposed to feel bad or glean some larger, cynical message about the world from it; for me, it is a story of bittersweet hope--a slow, sad hope that the ones we love and that the ones we’ve hurt will feel peace and sunshine, without the guaranteed promise or reward we will feel it for ourselves. But that, in our selfless kindnesses born out of real love and care for others, we can at least begin to see a better version of ourselves staring back at us--no matter how broken, how lonely, how downright used and ugly we feel.

To me, that is recovery. That is what the last ten months have been. There is no guarantee who I will be in a year--what wrongs I will right, what truths I will uncover, or even if I'll have managed to maintained my sobriety (though I feel hopeful). I am promised nothing but the day in front of me and the little, powerful joy I get in doing right by the universe with each passing hour.

And Battered Dove captures that perfectly. Can’t recommend that enough.

Thank you for being a friend and source of light through this hard time, @battydings. Pls accept this humble doodle and biggest thank you for writing such a wonderful, heartfelt story.

[50shadesofoctarine]

Why you should write that AO3 comment:

Hello! I am an AO3 author and professional fandom dipshit. This is an "essay" on why you should leave that comment on the fanfic you just read.

Table of Contents:

"Commenting is too much effort!"

"I don't know what to write!"

Do you want more fanfic?

Fan creators are human beings, not AI content generators.

You can count it as charity work on your metaphysical taxes.

"Commenting is too much effort!"

Yes, writing a comment takes energy. I'm an introvert, I get that. I have two counter arguments to this point.

AO3 comments are not the SAT:

This is a comment from my latest fic, Quantum Entangled.

Three words and a heart. It requires zero consideration, it isn't specific to the fic, it's something you could copy-paste, even. A comment like this is better than nothing. I'll let my reply from AO3 explain why:

"You know what, I appreciate this way more than you'd probably expect. The temptation to lurk is a strong one, both for social anxiety reasons and internet content-consumption culture reasons. But when people lurk, I can't tell that they've enjoyed the story. The more people that lurk instead of interacting, the more I assume that my work wasn't good enough, irrespective of the reader's actual feelings. So this was a very welcome comment to read. Thank you for indicating your enjoyment. I will endeavour to write more stuff for you to lurk on in the future. :)"

A comment like this, one that is as thoughtless and low effort as possible, is still a comment. Something that denotes a reader's interest. Because, and I can't be clear enough about this, I HAVE NO OTHER WAY OF KNOWING THAT YOU LIKED IT. Kudos and comments are my only window into the reader's experience.

Sure, I'd love more detailed and thorough comments on my work, but, if that expectation is the thing that's going to stop you from commenting at all, I'd prefer the bland copy-paste appreciation.

Onto my second argument.

Do you know what also takes effort? WRITING THE DAMN FIC:

You do not get to complain about being forced to type a congratulatory handful of words after reading that 200k slow-burn fantasy au. Do you know how many hours went into that thing? Do you? Because I can guarantee that it was A LOT. All that writers are asking for is a single emoji. A kudos, at the very least. Consider the effort that went into the creation that you've just experienced and give just a thimble full of it back.

Authors lay out a feast for you to devour. They're only requesting a "thank you".

"I don't know what to write!"

Like in the previous example, an AO3 comment can be as simple as three words saying that you appreciated it. Just an acknowledgement that you were there. It doesn't have to be fancy.

But if you want fancy...?

Here's one of my comments, from Tishae's Better Together.

Let me break it down for you.

"Stunning. This au is so well developed. I love how you managed to maintain tension after the point that they discover that their feelings are requited. This was brilliantly paced, and the action (esp the ending) was so engaging."

The comment opens with appreciation. (Think of it as a sandwich with love as the bread. It starts and ends with my enjoyment.)

There are specific details about what I liked.

"If I may ask, what was the crime that the Metatron committed? Maybe I'm bad at reading between the lines or maybe I missed something, but I'm really curious as to what dirt they have on him. Victimless? Bad enough for imprisonment, but not so morally reprehensible as to make Anathema reveal it? Did he embezzle? That's all I can really think of."

Continues with a specific question about the story and plot.

Shows that I was critically engaged and actively considering the story.

You don't have to have questions about every fic that you read, but don't be afraid to ask them if you do. I love it when people ask me about my work.

"Thank you for the delicious food. I honestly thought that you were going to have Crowley's final look be something in grey (black and white being the theme of the show, metaphorically representing separation/binary, so Aziraphale was uncomfortable with it due to the implications. Grey, symbolising unity/shades of grey as an idiom, would then be the biggest middle finger to the Metatron) but I do really like what you came up with."

Gratitude.

Thoughts about how I read the plot. (This is something I particularly love to read as an author. Please tell me what's going on in that funky lil' brain of yours!!)

"I'm hoping this comment provides plenty of dopamine. If the task activation and instant gratification parts of your brain light up, you might be more likely to write GO content again. Love your work, thanks for sharing it. I hope you gain 3 inches of metaphorical dick length. Please keep writing."

Encouragement to keep writing. (This is the best way to ensure that creators remain in the fandom)

A funny comment to sign off.

Now that you know what to comment, let's start on the real reasons why you should.

Do you want more fanfic?

Fun fact! Fanfictious Authoria are a species that sustain themselves entirely on a diet of brain worms, unfinished WIPs, and kudos. As one of the three fundamental food groups, removing kudos from the fandom ecosystem causes a complete collapse of the natural order. In times of unprecedented scarcity, entire populations of Fanfictious Authoria can die out completely. This means that the production of fanfiction, in that particular region of fandom, stops entirely, often causing major ecological damage, and the subsequent deaths of fan species in the same genus. (Like the Fanfictious Artia, or the Fanfictious Editour, both of which subsist on fanfiction based diets to survive.)

In conservation efforts, experts are imploring readers to donate kudos and comments toward any fandom region that they want to stay alive.

But I digress.

When I want more content, I tell the author. Ask and you shall receive; it's the best way to convince an author/artist to make more.

My comment on @mrghostrat's And They Were Streamers

You liked it? Then COMMENT! Not for the author's sake, but for your own. You want to see the ending of a WIP? Well, it'd be a terrible shame if the author gave up on it because they thought no one was reading... They don't know that you enjoy their work until you TELL THEM. They're not psychic, you have to help them hear you. Commenting on the things you like influences the creators of said things to attribute the act of making content (and, notably, making the type of content that specifically appeals to you) with the dopamine hit of reading your reaction. Treat them like Pavlov's dogs. Ring the kudos-bell.

Fan creators are human beings, not AI content generators.

They have real human feelings and real human egos. The contemporary attitude towards media engagement is skewed towards algorithmic, instant, and uncritical consumption. This is pumping straight gasoline into the beautiful lakes of our fandom ecosystem. Fandom cannot afford to treat its creators like mechanical text generators. We are not an unfeeling assembly line, only there to produce content. We are enthusiasts, engaging in our hobby. No fan creator has to show you anything. They are fully within their rights to keep their works hidden in their computer files, never to see the light of day. Every fanfic on AO3 is only there because someone had the grace to share it with you. You are not entitled to an author's work, just as they are not entitled to your kudos. We have a mutually beneficial arrangement. Do not forget your part in this symbiosis.

It's a problem that extends beyond AO3. Tumblr is a less enthusiastic place than it used to be. Fandom as a whole is drifting towards a consumption mindset. I, for one, am sick of it. Reblog things, like them, share them. Make fanart of fanart. Who gives a shit? Do the cringy thing. You don't have to cultivate your blog aesthetic. Be who you are, like what you like, and have enthusiasm about all of it. Fandom should be an expression of radical self acceptance. Embrace it. Leave essays about fics that you liked. Reblog the essays of other's when you see them. Exist in the mutual joy of seeing and being seen. You are not just an external observer, absorbing content from a distance. You are here too. Wave back at us. Say 'hi.'

You can count it as charity work on your metaphysical taxes.

My final appeal is a moral one.

Commenting on AO3 is just a kind thing to do.

You are your actions. Are you the kind of person who does the kind thing when no one is watching? When no one will care?

Fanfiction is a hobby, and I'm not here to guilt you about how you spend your leisure time. I'm only here to say that there is a kindness you could be giving the world.

If you are one of the people that performs this kindness, I thank you.

[90shaladriel]

A Lord and His Build - Chapter 17 (Completed)

Chapter 17 - Epilogue (Completed Fic!)

Rating: Mature

Words: 8k

Summary: Our hero's journey comes to an end but the paths go ever winding.

CW: References to birth and half-maia Celebrian 🤭

Thank you once again to the title art by @klynnvakarian!

Well this is the final chapter and instead of a snippet I just wanted to leave a comment on my overall thoughts on writing this fic.

Well, I can’t believe I actually did it! This is my first ever fic and it has turned into my longest after almost two years. While there are elements of this story I could imagine continuing, I felt that I wanted a solid conclusion and this was a sort of novel length point to end it. It was important to me that Ereddâz's journey had a satisfying ending for him. If you couldn’t tell, there’s elements of this character that are deeply personal to me and only became more so as the fic went on. I am grateful to have met this character and gone on this journey with him and at times it was very cathartic to some personal things I had going on. I hope I was true to the character though.

I truly had a great time writing this fic. It was a joy for me and I did feel proud of a lot of what I have written. Sometimes I think certain parts could’ve been better or I had other ideas that would’ve been cool but ended up on the cutting room floor so to speak. But overall this was such a memorable experience.

I’ll never forget the support and pseudo beta reading by my friends in the Saurondriel and Haladriel discords. In fact it was encouragement from one of those discords that I decided to actually put myself out there and write my first ever fan fic with zero experience in a community that I barely knew. That person said something like “your voice matters and we can use your contribution to the fandom” (paraphrasing). I can’t describe how encouraging those words were to read to get over the initial anxiety I had about writing this story.

Since most of the communities I was in were mostly focused on the Haladriel romance or even the smut side of things I did feel a bit on the outside having a very subtle Haladriel element while focusing on this Rings of Power AU story about Orc civilians. I think those fears disappeared after I started writing it for myself in a way AND then I continued getting all those lovely comments and kudos from all you readers here and on ao3. THANK YOU, your interest and appreciation definitely motivated me to come this far and finish it. Let me know what you think. Any constructive criticism is also appreciated!

[oathkeeper-of-tarth]

@buckysleftarm replied to your post:

After reading this, I happened across this video: https://youtube.com/shorts/-X5l5GFeg1k?si=H2lrsmx0pv60wn1h They're not in our camp anymore and I wouldn't know how to view the non companions anyway on PS5, but it feels like she definitely is taking some time off from Selune without breaking her oath full?

I sure did use this reply as an excuse to mash out a giant post! Hope you don't mind.

I do actually love that you've brought this up, because I keep seeing variants of it around and have been wanting to comment on it, if for nothing else than to make me feel better. The gist of it goes something like this: after killing Lorroakan, Aylin's "Child of the Moonmaiden" ability no longer shows up when you examine her character sheet, meaning her immortality has been taken away, she is being punished by her mother, has broken her paladin oath, or is feuding with her in some other way. Now... people in the comments of that video sure have takes on Selûne and on Aylin and on paladin oaths and aasimar abilities in general that make giant question marks spawn above my head. 

Personally? I dislike it immensely and think it makes zero sense for a variety of reasons, both in-universe and out! To be fair, as with most headcanons and theories, I'd genuinely love to see someone get creative and do something interesting with it. But I have this knee-jerk reaction to it because so far I've only seen it in the context of people parroting it completely uncritically, just regurgitating it on endless reddit or forum or discord threads and what have you, and actually shutting down or completely derailing Aylin-related discussion. Which frustrates me, obviously, because I want cool, detailed, thought-out takes on my fave, always, and - to be really petty for a moment - since my fave isn't the fandom darling, I only get crumbs to start with! It grinds my gears because so very often I'll want to read this potentially interesting thread about a character I love, but nope, instead here's a dozen comments how "nah man she broke her oath and there's special oathbreaker paladin dialogue with her about it" - no there isn't. That's a very easily verifiable fact, my guy. You made that up, my dude. How dare you just go and make things up on the internet. 

A ton of BG3 discussion has been flooded with a weird wave of statements that are just put there as well-known fact but in reality read like "I heard from a friend whose uncle works at the Nintendo Larian department and he told him Halsin went on a special mission and killed Isobel a century ago because he wanted to emotionally compromise Ketheric but then playtesters reacted badly to it and Wizards made them take it out but it's still hinted in the game, and also if you use an Elixir of Hill Giant Strength and do an unarmed attack on the cart at the entrance of the Emerald Grove you can get Mew" and I find it so grating. And then people waste time debunking this and arguing in the same circles and nobody ever moves on to more interesting stuff. I say this, as if I haven't been an active participant of internet fandom for decades and have literally anyone but myself to blame here, hah.

For instance, the way you phrased it here, as Aylin herself taking a break or trying to step away instead of the "being abandoned and punished by her mother" angle from the video and the comments? That's something I think has potential and something I want to rotate in my mind - would she do it? Could she do it? What would this entail and what would it mean for her? What would actually be enough to prompt her to even try? And it's cool that a little gameplay mechanic thingy prompted that! However - and I'm keeping it kinda vague because I don't want to spoil you on things that happen after the point you seem to be at - if we're talking purely established canon things and not brainstorming an AU or a post-game trajectory for this character, there is nothing actually in the game to indicate Aylin is taking a break from Selûne or her duties, especially not to the extent of having any of her abilities suspended. Quite the contrary, in fact. Everything we get from her and Isobel after the Lorroakan situation is handled shows she is, for better or worse, very much resolved to be her old self and very righteously angry and smiting evil in her mother's name as the Sword of Selûne and actively engaged in protecting Selûnites Realms-wide, and she has her full set of powers and blessings while doing so.

In this essay I will In the rest of this post I will try to be less cranky and I'm going to get a bit technical to try to actually explain what is going on with the "Child of the Moonmaiden" ability.

TL;DR: the buff is disabled as soon as Aylin enters the wizard tower, before any fight or backbreaking or feelings of loss and sadness, likely for the purpose of you being able to win or lose the fight no matter if you side with Aylin or betray her. It is a purely mechanical contrivance and has no narrative meaning, nor is its presence or absence mentioned or reflected in the narrative at all.

Here's Aylin in camp just before being told about the wizard:

Here she is at the start of the fight, when she is sided with:

And here she is, when you side against her:

The above is an oversimplification, however, because the actual implementation of Aylin's immortality is a bit of a mess.

There are two implementations of her resurrection active in the game, and both are implemented as a Status: "GLO_NIGHTSONGRESURRECTION" and "GLO_NIGHTSONG_RESURRECTION". Now, I don't know what was going on there and I'm certainly not a Larian dev, but that underscore situation there is... weird. I also don't know enough about BG3-specific scripting yet to come up with an explanation on why there would be two variants of it at all - if anyone does, please let me know! I'm very curious. However, these two implementations of her resurrection ability work very differently, and you can see the effects of both of them in-game. 

The first one, GLO_NIGHTSONGRESURRECTION, is named "Moonmaiden's Reconstitution" and is tied to the "Child of the Moonmaiden" Passive (itself called SHA_NightsongResurrection, side note: GLO is the "global" prefix and SHA is a prefix that signifies the Gauntlet of Shar area in Act 2). This ability makes Aylin auto-stabilise when downed instead of rolling death saves, go into the kneeling stabilised animation where she can be helped up or healed just like your party members - you know the one, with the little asterisk hovering above them. Then on the start of her next turn she heals for exactly 1HP (unless she's under a healing-disabling effect, such as Bone Chill, which is why people have trouble with her in the Myrkul fight) and she has only her Bonus Action, the same as any other previously downed character.

Mechanically, it applies the "GLO_NIGHTSONGRESURRECTION_DOWNED" Status to her which modifies what happens when she is Downed to implement the above non-standard behaviour, and also does stuff like turn off her Moonbeam if she had it active.

The "Moonmaiden's Reconstitution" Status itself is completely invisible in-game: it has properties such as "DisableOverhead;DisableCombatlog;DisablePortraitIndicator" aka doesn't show up as that little text popup above the character, doesn't show up in the combat log, and doesn't have a visible indicator icon anywhere.

The description for "Child of the Moonmaiden" is:

"Blessed with the favour of a goddess, Nightsong cannot be permanently killed. When unconscious, [at] the start of her turn she recovers 1 hit point."

The second one, GLO_NIGHTSONG_RESURRECTION with the extra underscore, is a Status called "Nightsong Soars Eternal", and that one doesn't have any other Statuses or Passives tied to it, it simply resurrects her immediately when she dies, and at full health. When it triggers, you can actually see her portrait drop out of the initiative tracker at the top of the screen as if she completely died, and then she gets put in again. This one is active even when the first one isn't, so you can see it in places like camp after she comes back from Lorroakan, and after she comes back for the finale all the way until the end of the game - and by "see it" I mean since it doesn't have any Passive ability connected to it, you have to actually get Aylin killed to see it trigger (I'm so sorry Aylin, it was important for the post, I swear).

The description for "Nightsong Soars Eternal" is:

"Nightsong will be resurrected by the powers of Selûne whenever she dies."

In Lorroakan's tower, BOTH of these are disabled, and if downed, Aylin will just lie there as if she died for real with the little red skull and the "Dead" status until she gets rezzed for a cutscene after the fight or, if betrayed, you go to long rest and then come back to see Lorroakan's progress, at which point she will be up and in the cage with a total of 1HP and that "Soul Caged" status instead. 

Note again that she visibly has "Child of the Moonmaiden" disabled as soon as she enters the wizard tower area, betrayed or not, before she does anything to anyone. It's a way of making sure the Lorroakan fight is actually winnable/loseable/concludable without her getting stuck in that revive with 1HP at the start of her turn loop. "Nightsong Soars Eternal" also obviously doesn't trigger. Instead she says her "I will rise again!" line and stays down. She has every other ability and buff active normally, even ones that explicitly mention coming from Selûne, like her iconic following Moonbeam, for example, or her fancy unique Smite.

Again, significantly: she does not have her immortality buffs if you fight against her, either, betraying her and causing Selûne's wrath and desire to protect her daughter to manifest physically in the room, including empowering Aylin herself with buffs that are called things like "Moonmother's Embrace". See what I'm getting at?

Interestingly, she also doesn't have it when you first meet her:

What does this all mean? Well, I'd say that if we took every gameplay/implementation thing about this game as in-universe gospel, Aylin herself would look a lot different and be far more scaly, for one.

(Makes me chuckle every time.)

In all seriousness, though, if something as big as this happened to a side but still fairly prominent character, the game would tell us about it. Or at least make a bigger deal of it than the deactivation of a passive ability visible on the Examine screen that many people sadly don't really tend to look at and read.

And here's the best thing: nobody has to take my word for any of this, you can see for yourself, without actually knowing how to unpack game files or having my frankly ridiculous amount of hard saves! I think this is super helpful in general, especially for people playing on console:

Here's a link to a truly amazing and consistently updated resource - every bit of dialogue in the game, nicely parsed and laid out and super readable (as well as some additional tools to play around with). 

Here's a website where you can search inside BG3 scripts and other files and take a look at a lot of the nitty-gritty implementation stuff in a convenient way.

I recognise that I go way too deep into things and overstuff my brain with minutiae, but that's just how I work. I take forever to post anything anywhere on the internet because I just physically cannot click a post button without triple-checking everything and quoting and screenshotting things, even if it's the same thing for the twentieth time, and that's certainly a me problem. I very much don't expect people to do things my way, but I also find the games of telephone these things so rapidly become really frustrating, you know?

But my biggest problem with this particular Aylin thing - beyond the annoying preponderance of it, as I've already whined - is that in-universe it just makes no sense and I, an aasimar paladin enjoyer, personally dislike it.

Oath of Vengeance paladins abide by the following tenets: Fight the Greater Evil. Exerting your wisdom, identify the higher morality in any given instance, and fight for it. No Mercy for the Wicked. Chasten those who dole out their villainy by wiping their blight from the world forever.

Putting the rest of this post under a cut because it's long and ranty and you didn't actually ask for it.

My first problem: the common argument that Aylin is in the wrong for killing Lorroakan like she did because he has "done nothing to her yet", and that she breaks her Oath of Vengeance because she attacked him preemptively.

The man put a price on her head and sent violent mercs to beat her up and kidnap her. He tries to (temporarily) kill her and imprison her as soon as she refuses to cooperate by… demurely waltzing into the prison and putting the chains on herself? He knows exactly who she is, what has been done to her, and he wants to do it again - no, doesn't want to, he is actively doing it again. The fact that (if you side with Aylin) he fails mid-attempt doesn't make him innocent of it. He refuses to stop and, if denied, gets violent and murderous. 

Player: Have it your way. I'll bring her here. Lorroakan: Good. I was growing scared for you. The last person who disappointed me is suffering for it still. Do not return without my prize. Do you hear me? Good day.

Player: I'll think about it. Lorroakan: You aren't the only one who knows what's on offer for the Nightsong's retrieval. Consider carefully whether you'd like to see your fortune in someone else's hands. Someone who might slip into your camp at any moment, or harry you through street and inn until you're run ragged and surrender. The choice is yours: fortune or imminent death. I know you'll choose wisely.

Mark my words: the Nightsong is mine. With or without your help, she will ascend to her grand fate here, in this tower.

Player: You heard me. The answer is no. Lorroakan: Pity. Then again, perhaps word of your agonising death will draw your little friend to me. Myrmidons - imperatum!

He is fully equipped for it and has set up a whole magical trap and is just waiting for her to show up to trigger it, or for someone to drag her there against her will. He says she will go into the cage "kicking and screaming" and really, this is who she is wrong for "picking a fight with" and "attacking preemptively"? Surely nobody actually thinks that Aylin is at fault here or that she actually overreacted by killing him? I don't really want to go into some people's really, really shitty attitudes towards Aylin for sadly entirely predictable reasons but… man. She went over there and threatened him with violence, demanding an explanation after he sent cronies to attack her in her sleep? Wow, what a weird thing to do. Also, he literally is the one to attack first! She is there threatening and goading him, doing her little "face me charlatan" bit, but he is the one who sics the myrmidons on her (or the player) and actually starts the fight, every time. To be clear, I don't think this is very relevant at all, but people do seem to love bringing it up.

Is Aylin brash and reckless and clearly struggling after her captivity, dealing with rapidly flaring up anger and outbursts of violence - only ever, may I emphasise, towards actually horrid people, and she is really rather shockingly forgiving and tolerant of the player character messing with her? Yes! Does she seem to have that classical aspect of "she might go too far one day" or "she might lose herself in the anger and vengeance if she focuses on it exclusively"? Absolutely! Do I think she could have been, say, a Devotion paladin before her imprisonment and it might have been the betrayal and century in the Shadowfell that made her change to Vengeance instead? I love that idea! I also think it's likely she has just always been a very zealous, very smitey and offence-oriented Vengeance paladin, called Selûne's sword for a very good reason, fulfilling a very important role in the ongoing struggle against Shar.

And the whole problem is… Lorroakan will, as we've seen, not stop trying, and people like him will always be around and never stop coming after her especially now that the cat's apparently out of the bag after Balthazar, and Aylin needs to live with this, forever. That is why she is so messed up about this one rando wizard she's never met before. That is why this specific incident is so triggering for her. She has just escaped torment on a timescale that's not something the normal human mind can really grasp. "In this moment, I want for nothing." ended up lasting, indeed, barely a moment! Her mum is a powerful god and right now it seems that what Aylin actually gets from it is having a target painted on her back and, to quote Isobel, she can be hurt just like anyone else, she just gets to suffer longer! She keeps being dealt these shit hands and, yeah, it'd make anyone go… why? Seems unfair, right? What exactly is the point of this? 

The various dialogue options you have while warning her about Lorroakan's intentions and which include trying to convince her to just leave him be include her being so, so frustrated, and so understandably, it makes me feel horrible for her. 

She always ultimately goes to confront him, because she has no other real choice. He will keep coming after her, he will keep sending people after her, and she will never, ever get a bit of rest, and she's, what, supposed to go live in hiding somewhere if you convince him she's dead? Until the jig is inevitably up or this guy dies by someone else's hand? And there's also the element Aylin herself will point out if you keep her in the dark about the plot and Aradin and his cronies come to attack your camp: how long until someone hurts Isobel during one of these attempts or actively goes after her as a bargaining chip?

I guess I just genuinely do not understand the arguments about this guy who has been deliberately constructed to be a horrible, hateful piece of shit with exactly zero redeeming qualities, to an almost comical extent. He beats his apprentice and uses his assistant for target practice! He's a sick, sick asshole! His life's dream rests on kidnapping and enslavement! The guy is conspiring and trying to ally with Ketheric and Balthazar of all people: 

Lorroakan,

I have responded out of respect to my counsellor, Balthazar, who advises me that you may prove a loyal ally in the coming fight. I understand you wish to know about the soul cage which binds the Nightsong to me. Details, I cannot and will not provide. But the magic itself is necromantic in nature, designed by my aforementioned counsellor. I hope your curiosity is satisfied.

General Ketheric Thorm

This is who people think a vengeance pally will break her oath over? Over what, a technicality of who struck first? "Desecrating a corpse"? No, it was Ketheric she did that to, and nothing happened. She just finished this guy off in a violent and dramatic fashion. 

While you can play a paladin yourself and kill so many people in so many ways without anything happening, this is more of a consideration if you play Oath of Devotion or Ancients. It's also one that makes parts of the game harder - comically evil cultists torturing and executing prisoners cannot simply be attacked out of nowhere, and instead you need to announce your challenge first. You need to walk up to them and start talking, establish their villainy, and then fight "fairly". This is also partially an issue arising from the implementation of hostility flags and game logic, by the way. However, Oath of Vengeance gives precious few fucks about this and is a really hard oath to break. In fact, in a very similar situation to the wizard tower, in the House of Grief, you break the Oath of Vengeance if you spare Viconia - at that point lying on the floor soundly defeated and bleeding out much the same way Lorroakan was. Viconia who, may I note, never "did anything to you" but did harm a friend of yours.

Also, and this is a whole separate discussion, but... it's a FR DnD game. You kill bad guys in it. You kill vaguely morally grey, or even good guys in it. You and your friends kill so many people before this point. Multi-act quest arcs conclude with "go to place and kill someone". You mete out "justice" personally, repeatedly, and can harp on that fact, especially if you're playing a paladin. You don't exactly call the guards on people instead, even in the middle of the city. Ludo-narrative dissonance or no, why would this one wizard suddenly be different, and why would this one woman be singled out for a thus far completely typical approach and set of actions? 

My second problem: a great big "Selûne wouldn't do that". I understand Forgotten Realms "lore" is a giant unwieldy self-contradicting mess of a beast and I'm not saying people should be scholars of it to participate in the discussion, far from it, but I would like them to engage with what is presented in the game itself at least.

For the most succinct possible example, look at what Selûne does when Aylin is betrayed. She buffs her in order to enable her to violently and zealously win that fight. Literally empowers Aylin to smack her enemies around more and with greater strength and also burn them alive in holy fire. Not after she's imprisoned and well and truly "wronged", but during this fabulously absolving "mere attempt" on Lorroakan's part.

Also, may I point out the sweet little shielding- and healing-focused cleric of the same goddess is actively disappointed that you and Aylin won't let her come with to hit the guy a few times herself! This goes for the entire party of assorted weirdos, goody-good or otherwise, who firmly believe Aylin should just obliterate that guy. Like, c'mon, my man Wyll! (Super sad and touching exception: Karlach, if you've killed Gortash already. When she begs you not to tell Aylin about any of it at all and go deal with the wizard yourselves, just so Aylin can have a bit more peace and keep her sword sheathed for just a little while longer. Ow, my heart.)

In summary, basically, my twofold beef:

"Selûne punishing and abandoning her daughter for over-zealously defending herself" - nonsensical and uninteresting. Stops people from actually delving into and discussing the complexities of that relationship.

"OoV paladin broke her oath by killing an evil wizard who is actively trying to do horrible things to her and attacks her" - nonsensical and uninteresting. Let's instead actually engage with the material and discuss Aylin's trauma and how she might deal or not deal with it in good or bad ways. What would recovery even look like, for her. How does the way she intrinsically ties her entire being into being a smite-happy moon-magic knight play into it. Let's actually consider the weight and role of duty in her life and the wombo-combo of being an aasimar paladin, an existence with a very "purpose-made" aspect to it. You know, the good ol' Being A Sword thing, including being born into it. Combined with being rather suddenly rather intensely humanised by a loving relationship with a mortal woman, with all sorts of ticking clocks, unique challenges, and both past and pending tragedy there.

Or let's talk about the dissonance present in Aylin's cool and badass scenes of smiting deserving evil. Scenes that go into very violent and very over the top territory, that make you both cheer and cringe, that make a point of showing the other characters reacting in shock. Because I genuinely feel so bad for her and deeply worried for her, all while my silly little brain goes fuck yeah smite him shiny lady! Ooooh look, a flashy Aylin scene, ripping a deserving villain to pieces! But at what cost to herself? Feels so good to have someone deliver some justice! But if I think about it for 5 seconds I don't actually want her to - no, no, I do. I don't want her to have to, is the thing. (It's kind of like that one Gundam meme.)

I will conclude this mess by doing a salty little yeah. It's fine, this is fine, this is sadly pretty much part of the standard experience of liking a female character in fandom. God forbid women do anything indeed. Outside of a few select, narrow and highly dedicated circles, half the (scarce) posts about her are something that's either flat-out wrong, or just assumes the absolute worst of her and reduces her to two and a half shitty stereotypes, and half the fics tagged with her are actually about fandom's favourite two dudes and barely feature her at all.

And on that note, I'm off to actually be a positive force and poke at my own fic some more.

[queenjunothegreat]

OHOHOHO!!!!!! Last fandom event involved a self-indulgent crossover AU that literally only I cared about, so you KNOW I had to go for round two with Lost Trio Week! ( ✿ Ò ω Ó)φ__ This time we're doing a CORALINE AU, which I think is VERY exciting! If you've never seen/read Coraline, fear not! This fic requires absolutely ZERO knowledge of that universe because Piper doesn't know anything about it either.

So, I am VERY proud to present the first chapter of my @lost-trio-week day two fic: Mechanical Lulluby

Piper walked through the front door and as soon as she did, her senses were flooded by the warm rich aroma of chili. Without even thinking to take off her boots Piper scrambled to the kitchen, and her face lit up when she saw her dad humming to himself as he stirred the cast iron pot on the stove. As if sensing her he chuckled softly. "Piper, you're getting mud everywhere." She didn't care. "Dad is it really you?" He paused then and chuckled again. "Not quite." He turned around, and Piper couldn't stifle a gasp. The man before her had her dad's swooping hair and his charming smile, but instead of eyes he had two big shiny black buttons. "I'm your Other Father." *** Piper is an 11-year-old girl, forced to move to the awful town of Lakesville, Oregon. Between the dreary weather, the unsettling neighbors, the ugly house, and her dad's busy schedule, she's forced to make the best of nothing. Then she meets two boys and together they go tumbling into a world just like their own but better in every way. But Piper gets an ominous warning: Never trust everything you see. Now she has to find the wit and courage needed to keep herself and her friends safe. Lost Trio Week 2024 - Day Two: Crossover

To say that Piper was unhappy with her dad’s decision to take her out of school right in the middle of spring break and move her a thousand miles away from everything she was finally starting to get used to was a gross understatement. Everything about the move was awful and seemingly perfectly designed as an attempt to ruin her young life. She hated everything about everything, up to and including the house her dad had moved her into. It was a rather unpleasant shade of pink, like someone had tried to liven the place up by painting it the same color as the medicine her dad made her drink when she had a stomach ache. Only, they had made that decision a billion and a half years ago, so all the paint was faded and gross and dirty. It was old and shabby and run down and ugly and everything Piper had thought it would be and she hated it.

“It’s not old, it’s historic,” her dad had corrected when she’d voiced her complaints.

Only, it wasn’t historic. Much like everything else in town, it wasn’t old enough to be historic, it was just old enough to be bad. Laketown, Oregon didn’t show up on any maps other than local ones. It wasn’t big enough to draw anyone in, and it wasn’t small enough to be cute and quaint. It was just perfectly middle of the road enough to not offer anything of value to anyone. In fact, the only remotely interesting thing about Laketown was that it was founded on an underground lake, so there were old wells spotted around everywhere. In another life, that might have been cool, but by now the lake and all the wells had dried up, so Laketown didn’t even have the dumb lake it was named after. 

Piper didn’t want to live there. She hadn’t exactly loved living in LA, either, but it was better than this place. She wanted to go home, back to Oklahoma and the crisp, clear air and the wide open sky that stretched out for miles and miles and miles. Oregon was nothing like home. Here, she was surrounded by trees, and Laketown had exactly the right amount of lights to blot out the stars when she stared up at the sky, longing for one little piece of the life she’d been forced to leave behind. Unfortunately, no one asks eleven-year-old girls where they want to live, especially not their dads, who were offered a long-term gig as the main character of a TV show, with only the stipulation that they had to film on site. Piper wanted to be glad that her dad’s acting career was going so well, but she couldn’t help but think that making her move to this awful, rotten place was a little unfair. 

“Why don’t you go play outside?” Piper’s dad suggested, not looking up from the script in front of him. He was sitting in his office, surrounded by untouched boxes of all his stuff, just like he had since the moment they’d arrived. He’d shooed Piper off before by telling her she needed to go unpack her room, but it seemed that those orders didn’t apply to him. “You could introduce yourself to the neighbors. Make a good first impression.”

Piper wrinkled her nose. That was the other rotten thing about this house: she and her dad didn’t own the whole thing. That would have been too expensive. Instead, they rented the bottom floor while the basement and upstairs was rented to other people. She had met them, but only in passing, and she wasn’t exactly thrilled to spend any more time with them, but she’d learned that her dad’s “suggestions” when he was studying scripts weren’t really all that suggestive at all.

The Gray Sisters lived downstairs in the basement, which meant that they didn’t have any windows other than a couple of sad little window wells dug out around the living room. It also meant that the whole place was oddly damp. The underground lake and wells may have dried up, but the ground was almost always a little squishy with the amount of rain the town got. Again, just enough rain to make everyone and everything gray and miserable, but not enough to win any sort of records. Just in that area of painful mundanity.

The Gray Sisters themselves were old. Old enough that Piper would agree to calling them historic. Prehistoric, even. Each one of the three old ladies looked one step away from being a poorly-preserved mummy, with their sunken cheeks and wrinkled skin. Each one of them had one working eye and one hollowed out socket (though only one of them actually kept her eye open at once) and one singular yellow snaggletooth each. All this together meant that when they spoke, their words were soft and gummy and Piper couldn’t be entirely sure when they were talking to her because most of the time they had their eyes closed and weren’t even facing in her direction. 

Piper probably wouldn’t have minded all this quite so much if any of the Gray Sisters were like the old ladies back in Oklahoma who liked to sit together on their rocking chairs and sew while they laughed uproariously at one another’s jokes and clapped in delight when Piper sang for them. No, the Gray Sisters were mean, if not to Piper, then definitely to one another. They were constantly shouting at one another and they had awful little nicknames they used instead of real names. 

“Anger!” the one in the kitchen shrieked in her shrill, awful voice. “You’ve gone and lost the sugar bowl again! How are we meant to serve the girl tea now?”

“You don’t have to serve me any tea,” Piper assured them. She didn’t even like tea. They didn’t listen to her.

“Not I, Wasp!” the shortest sister spat back. “T’was Tempest who used it last!”

“Oh, ‘tis lost, ‘tis lost!” the third one wailed, tears steadily pouring down one of her cheeks. “Lost forever to the abyss!”

“What abyss, ma’am?” Piper asked politely. In response, Tempest sobbed louder.

“The abyss, the abyss,” Wasp muttered. She clutched at her chest in terror, and Piper wondered what she was meant to do if any of these ladies had a heart attack while she was with them. “Surely, you do not mean there?” Again, Tempest sobbed louder.

“What abyss?” Piper asked again, just in case she wasn’t heard before.

“The abyss, girl! Pay attention!” Anger snapped. “The abyss in which things are sealed away, drowned, and returned to the world, changed and made anew!”

Piper frowned and cocked her head to the side. “You mean the dishwasher?” The three women howled in terror, sorrow, and fury.

Piper left without getting any tea. 

Her neighbor who lived on the second story was a man named Mr. V. He was a big, scary-looking man, with broad shoulders he kept hunched up around his ears, a scowl so deep Piper was pretty sure his face was stuck like that, and a thick black beard that reminded Piper of the scratchy wire brushes people used to clean up rust. He was so big that Piper wasn’t sure how he managed to fit through his own narrow front door, much less up the rickety fire escape that led to it, and she was convinced that one day he was going to step too hard and fall right through the floor onto her and her dad’s dining table. 

His floor was almost as dark and cramped as the Gray Sisters’, but unlike them, he only had himself to blame. He kept all the lights on his floor dimmed, and every square inch of floor space was taken up by big, oil-smudged machines. Some of them made loud, ominous clicking and thumping sounds, some whirred and spun in place while giant exposed gears ker-thunked into place, and still more belched out thick black smoke and bright tongues of orange flame, some of which made their homes as embers in the thick of Mr. V’s wiry beard. All of the machines seemed designed to do something different, but if Piper was being honest, she wasn’t entirely sure they did anything useful, other than take up space and require Piper to twist and bend and tiptoe her way through to the heart of the home.

“Don’t you touch that, Pippy!” Mr. V shouted at her, causing her to almost lose her balance and stumble over a pile of chains in her shock. 

“My name’s Piper, not Pippy,” she reminded him again.

That was the other unfortunate thing about Mr. V. He didn’t like Piper at all. She wasn’t sure if it was a matter of him not liking people, not liking children, or just specifically not liking her. She wouldn’t really be surprised if any one of the three answers (or maybe even all of them) turned out to be true, but she knew for a fact that one of them was. She tried not to take it to heart, but it was a little hard to not get your feelings hurt when someone scowled at you like you’d committed the ultimate crime by existing.

“What are you doing in here?” Mr. V demanded. “I told you I need to be left well enough alone when I’m working.”

“My dad wanted me to come say hi,” she told him. There was an empty barstool near his work desk, so she climbed up on it, happy to be both off her feet and out of danger of accidentally touching something. “Whatcha working on?”

Mr. V scowled at her, but again, Piper was pretty sure that’s just what his face looked like after a lifetime of grumpiness. She wondered how he’d look if he actually tried to smile. The thought was almost scarier than the man himself. He stared at her for a few seconds, like he was trying to find something to yell at her about, but came up short, seeing as Piper was sitting perfectly still up on her perch. Eventually he settled for a gruff, “I’m an engineer, not a babysitter.”

“I don’t need a babysitter,” Piper informed him. “My dad lets me stay by myself.”

That made Mr. V pause and he squinted at her. “Yeah?”

“Yup,” she said, puffing up in pride. “I’ve been allowed to babysit myself since my last birthday.”

“If that’s the case, then you can go outside and babysit yourself, Pippy. Away from me.”

Piper blew a loud raspberry at him, which her dad would have been very embarrassed about if he’d been with her, but she didn’t care. Mr. V was mean and he deserved it. “My name is Piper!” she told him one last time before retreating out the front door. 

Once she was back on the ground, she looked around and once again felt the enormity of her dissatisfaction weigh heavily on her shoulders. Just as it had for the past four days since they’d moved in, there was a thick misty fog that hung over the ground, reaching up to her waist. It wasn’t thick enough to keep her from actually seeing the ground or anything like that, but it did make the ground squelch unpleasantly when she stepped on an extra-squishy patch of grass. She kind of wished she’d gotten a chance to find her rain boots, but her dad had fussed at her for dawdling and making a ruckus, so she’d been sent out in the new sneakers she didn’t even like. 

With that thought, she stomped as hard as she could, watching the mud ooze up and stain the white fabric with a sense of gratification. 

She gleefully wandered around the soggy yard, taking care to jump on any spots that made that squelching noise, but that could only last so long. Ruining her shoes was fun, but soon her shoes were caked in mud and she was left with cold, damp feet and no goal. 

That was when she spied a stick on the ground in a perfect capital ‘Y’ shape. The visitors’ center in town had a display about all the bunches of wells scattered around town and even how the people who founded the town used dowsing rods made of wood and bits of metal to locate the water hidden underground. She didn’t know how it worked, but she knew they used sticks that looked just like that, and she was very good at playing pretend. 

“Okay, stick!” she ordered, holding it out in front of her. “Take me to the nearest well!”

She shut her eyes for dramatic effect, then stumbled forward as if yanked along by her magical stick. She wandered all over, weaving in and out of the treeline, only peeking open one eye occasionally to make sure she wasn’t going to run into anything. She didn’t know where she was going, but she didn’t really think it mattered all that much, seeing as everyone in town knew about the house she was living in. If she got lost she could just go to the nearest grown-up and ask for the Pink Palace, and they’d wince in sympathy and take her right back. She’d be fine. 

She’d wandered into a clearing when something caught her attention. In between her announcing to herself what she was doing and communing with her stick, she heard a quiet rustling sound. She froze, waiting to see if it happened again, but there was nothing. Still, she could feel a gaze prickling at the back of her neck. Someone – or something – was watching her. 

She cleared her throat, and tried not to sound scared. “Okay, stick! I think we’re almost there! Lead on so that our town might find water!” She made a show of shutting her eyes and walking forward, but she kept one cracked open just enough to see around her.

Then, out of the corner of her vision, she saw movement. In a split second, her eyes flew open and she whirled around on her heel. “What are you doing?” she demanded at the top of her voice, trying to sound as intimidating as possible. 

It definitely worked, but considering her opponent was just a kid instead of a scary murderer, the feat wasn’t quite so impressive.

“Ahh!!” the boy screamed, cowering behind his outstretched hands.

“Ahh!!” Piper screamed right back, startled by the sound. 

“Ahh!!” the boy screamed one last time before he composed himself. He scowled at Piper. “What’s wrong with you? You shouldn’t scare people!”

“Well, you shouldn’t be a stalker!” Piper scowled right back.

“I wasn’t stalking you; I was following you!”

“Same difference!”

The boy puffed out his cheeks and kicked at the ground. “I just wanted to see what you were doing,” he huffed. “Theresa said a kid moved into the house and I wanted to say hi.”

“Well, then why were you following me instead of talking to me?” Piper said, her tone still a little accusatory. 

The boy shrugged, and gestured at the stick she’d abandoned. “I wanted to see what you were doing. You looked weird.”

Piper felt her cheeks go a little warm at the thought of being caught in her game, but she just stuck her nose in the air and went to retrieve her stick. “It’s called water witching,” she said in her best know-it-all voice. “I use this magic stick to lead me to wells and underground water.” 

The boy looked impressed. “Well, you must be really good at it.”

“What do you mean?” Piper asked, cocking her head to the side. 

“Well, you’re about six inches from falling into an abandoned well right now.” Piper yelped and leapt back towards the boy, who doubled over in laughter. “You should have seen your face!”

Piper rolled her eyes and shoved him. “Whatever. I bet you were lying about the well.”

“I was not!” the boy said, outraged. “Look!” He gingerly stepped over and kicked some of the dirt and leaves around until the lip of a well and its wooden cap became visible. “See? Told ya.”

“I wouldn’t have fallen in, though,” Piper pointed out. “It’s got a lid.”

“Wood’s all rotted out,” the boy informed her. “You can try to stand on it, but I wouldn’t suggest it. You’ll fall right through, just like Dylan did last year.”

Piper shivered and took another step back just to be safe. “Well, thanks for telling me, I guess.” She smiled then, and stuck out her hand. “My name’s Piper McLean.”

“I know,” the boy told her, shaking her hand. “My name’s Leo Valdez.”

“What do you mean you know?”

“Theresa, the lady I live with, owns the house you’re renting,” Leo explained. “Your dad’s an actor, right? I heard her complaining about it to her boyfriend, Michael.”

“Oh. How come you don’t live with your parents?” 

Immediately, Leo clammed up and he scowled at her. “None of your business.”

Piper narrowed her eyes at him for a moment before she shrugged. “Okay. You wanna go exploring with me? My dad’s busy with his script, so he wants peace and quiet at the house.”

“Yeah, okay,” Leo agreed easily. “Theresa doesn’t let me in until sundown anyway.”

Piper very much wanted to ask him again what he meant by that, but she figured it wasn’t any of her business, either. So, the two of them wandered through the trees together. Every once in a while, they’d interrupt their walk with a quick game of tag, until Leo tripped and fell, scraping up his chin.

“Ow!” Leo whined, sitting back on his heels and cupping his muddy hands to his chin. “That hurt!”

“Are you okay?” Piper asked, crouching down in front of him.

“Yeah,” Leo muttered sourly. “I dunno what I tripped on, though.”

Piper looked around for the culprit until her eyes fell on a nearby tree root. It was bumped up out of the ground at just the right height to send an eleven-year-old boy tumbling. She followed it up to the tree it was attached to, and her eyes grew wide and round in wonder. “Leo! Look!”

“Look at what?” Leo huffed but he looked over to where she was pointing and he grinned. “That’s so cool!”

The tree Piper was pointing at was perfectly hollow, from one side all the way to the other. It wasn’t a big opening, but it was plenty big enough for Piper to crawl through on her hands and knees. What was most remarkable about it, though, was that the tree was still covered in shiny new growth leaves. She knew that sometimes trees could live after being hollowed out, but the rest of the trees around her bore the soft green leaves of spring, while this tree was blanketed in a warm, bright ocher. 

“You’ve never seen this tree before?” Piper asked.

Leo shook his head. “Nuh-uh. I’d remember something like this. It’s kinda funny, with the time I spend outside, I figured I’d seen every tree by now.”

“Huh.” Piper studied it for a bit more before she grinned at Leo. “It looks like a portal. We should go through.”

Leo’s face puckered in confusion for a second before he shrugged and followed her lead as she crawled through the little arch left by the tree. When they were both through, she loudly gasped and proclaimed, “Leo, we’re in a magic world now.”

Leo furrowed his brow for a moment and looked around like he was trying to figure out what she was talking about before he looked back at her. “Uh, okay.”

“In order to fit into this world, we have to become magic, too,” she informed him. “I’m an elf wizard assassin who was sent here to kill the evil king.”

Leo just stared at her until she gave him a meaningful look and tapped her toes expectantly. “Oh, I’m, uh, a mechanic?”

“A mechanic?” Piper said, very unimpressed.

“Yeah! A magic mechanic!” Leo insisted. “I can fix anything and I can make magic tools and stuff.” 

Piper considered that for a moment before she nodded in agreement and Leo grinned at her. “Alright then. Come on, we’ve got to work together to overthrow the king.”

Piper soon lost track of time as they played their game. They never got around to defeating their evil king antagonist, but Piper had been introduced to Leo’s pet robot dragon (she tried to argue that robots did not belong in her fantasy world, but Leo insisted that it was an enchanted robot dragon, so she let it slide) and they’d found a way to infiltrate the castle. Piper was about to suggest they begin their final assault before she felt a big, fat raindrop hit her cheek. She stared up at the suddenly darkened sky and felt another one hit her between the eyes. 

“It’s gonna start raining,” she informed Leo.

He squinted up at the sky, too and frowned. “Yeah. We’d better head back before it starts really coming down. I can show you the way home.” Piper nodded and followed him out of the trees and he pointed across the little field towards an ugly pink house. “That’s where your house is.”

She nodded at him then cocked her head to the side. “Do you wanna hang out again tomorrow?”

Leo looked startled that she’d ask him such a thing before he grinned. “Yeah! You wanna meet in your yard?”

“Okay,” she agreed. Then she waved and started running for her house. “See you tomorrow, Leo!”

“Bye, Piper!”

She didn’t wind up beating the rain home, and when she trudged through the house soaking wet, her dad only sighed and told her to shower and get cleaned up before dinner. Dinner was leftovers from the takeout they’d had the night before, but Piper’s dad promised he’d make a real dinner for them the next night, so Piper tried not to make too many faces at her microwaved noodles. She tried to tell him about the afternoon she’d had, about meeting the neighbors and all the fun she’d had with Leo, but he was still reviewing his script, so she never got anything more than a distracted, “That’s great, Pipes,” in response, and the rest of dinner passed in silence. 

That night, as Piper curled up in bed under her big, fluffy blanket, she told herself that things were going to be better tomorrow. 

[transhoverfish]

OK SO IM LATE BUT. MORE SUB3 NEWS!!!

so a few days ago, krafton (their publisher), apparently had this like presentation of their plans over the next like 2 years. and during that they talked a bit about sub 3!

and this obviously creates a LOT of questions. not to worry, though, because unknown worlds added on to this:

im honestly not surprised by this. iirc, when below zero released they said it would be a WHILE before the next game, and they only announced this back in like... january? now, the first game's release was in january, and bz was in may, so it's definitely possible early access with be in spring of 2025. those games did not have multiplayer aspections tho! its possible we'll wait until mid 2025, and full release will likely not be until 2026. but who knows? the first game took like ten to be fully finished!!

and honestly. THANK GOD. i can't imagine any subnautica game having BATTLE PASSES or LOOT BOXES. i would have just straight up ignored this game 😭

i do wonder what these updates will entail! "many years to come" is definitely something interesting to me, because other than bug fixes... i dont remember sub or bz getting many updates post full release. is this referring to bug fixes, or is it implying that it will be in a state of early access for much longer? are they going to just keep adding new things (like the building update for sub1) and taking fandom suggestions? very interested!!

maybe this is an unpopular opinion, but i actually,,,, dont want multiplayer. now i do like bz, and these games arent really intended to be horror games, but also bz is very noticeablely less scary than sub1. and some of it i think definitely has to do with all the extra characters and dialogue. its hard to feel isolated when you know al-an and marg are nearby. so im very happy that it's optional, bc i know i will probably enjoy single player a lot more enjoyable!!

so now... SPECULATION.

so the first thing im curious about that the development team didnt mention:

"uncover the mysteries on an entirely new alien planet"

apprently we are NOT returning to 4546b. which im kind of sad about!! ik the story is very obviously done there, but it feels weird that its going to be some other planet this time around. THERE WONT BE PEEPERS!!!! (well there could be but it would be weird if some other random planet had the exact same lifeforms)

now my next immediate thought is: is this a direct continuation of below zero? my opinion is: no. probably not.

mostly because it mentions up to four players, and robin and alan are, if you look very closely, only two people. now they COULD just create two new characters to go alongside them (my fanfic brain loves the au idea of marg and ryley 🥺) but im just going to assume that with the addition of a new planet, we're going to drop the old storylines. which means no more degasi, sunbeam, aurora, or ayou sisters. we might move away from architects/precursors altogether! (my basis on this is absolutely nothing and i could be wrong, this is 100% just theorizing)

also, i imagine that it would be difficult to keep the plot the exact same with two established characters and then two new ones, depending on how this multiplayer aspect works. if its another crash, it would be a lot easier to just have the extra players die/survive, then try to work in a balancing act of one guy playing al-an.

(also i like keeping the ending of bz vauge. if they show up again, they would have to mention what happened to the rest of the architects, and i think it's much more fun if thats a mystery!)

((also also, im gonna drop a bomb on u all for a second. i actually,,, dont like al-an. i have a deeper connection to probably every single other character in bz. i think they really fumbled al's character and story and he is so incredibly bland to me. it feels like they go nowhere with how he was responsible for the kharra outbreak because the game ends immediately after he confesses! it would be nice to give him another chance, sure, but i personally dread the idea of even more al-an. sorry everyone for this horrible news))

HERE'S A CONCEPT IMAGE

i hope they bring back some cut content creatures for this!! i noticed this new area looks VERY similar to the safe shallows, and several of the fish seem to be variations of ones we've already seen (im already seeing bladderfish and hoopfish color pallettes, and the shark resmbles some early concept art for the shadow leviathan, but with the ice worm's colors...)

will there be more land areas?? is it going to entirely underwater?? more kharra?? NO DISEASE AT ALL?? AAAAAA!!!!

[spadesncrows]

ok so abt that au i was talking abt before,,, 🥺👉👈

To start off, this is something I’ve had in the back of my mind for quite a bit that I haven’t been able to fully express and show due to reasons I’ll mention later. This project has lowkey given me some brainrot so I hope my words don’t just sound like I’m going clinically insane LMAOO i swear I’m so definitely normal abt my aus guys (denial)

Dead Casino is a twst au I’ve had for a while but has been on the backburner for being very unfinished. However, since it’s a little (keyword: little) bit more fleshed out, I think I can at least give a general summary on the concept !! :D

First off, the concept behind it was a direct inspiration from mlp infection aus I’ve seen on insta. Since mlp was a large chunk of my childhood and certain variants of horror had become an interest of mine as of late, I liked the idea of mixing them together. But—of course—when I enjoy something just enough, it eventually becomes a feeling of “how can I forcefully throw it in with my current obsession into the mind equivalent of a blender” and Dead Casino was the smoothie that came out of it. Essentially, the resulting foundation is that NRC experiences a zombie apocalypse, but as with most things I obsess over, I wanted to build on that.

To get into the nitty gritty of it first, there’s a few core things abt the infection that basically effect not only what the characters face, but the story itself:

The infection is primarily based off of blot, and the concept of it using something/someone as a vessel to control and harm others

While blot zombies are the most common creature plaguing the school, blot has the capability to take over different objects as well when under specific circumstances, which leads to the creation of (mostly) nonhuman blot infested monsters

Over-accumulation of blot can lead to an increased vulnerability to the infection. This especially targets those that have overblotted prior to the outbreak, even if they had seemingly “fully recovered” :)

As for the story, I don’t wanna get super into it just bc yknow spoilers, but the general overview is relatively simple(ish). Basically, it folllows Ace and the rest of his group of survivors (mostly Cater, Trey and Jade) after the initial outbreak on campus. I wanna say anywhere from a month to a month and a half?? Basically enough time to be at least a little more accustomed to everything going on if that makes sense !!

Ace and co. take refuge in classrooms near the cafeteria, but just like everyone else, is not allowed to leave the safezone unless permitted. Surprise surprise, he leaves the safezone not permitted. In fact he does this multiple times through the first couple chapters alone. And the whole story.

But essentially, Ace manages to figure out two things the first time he leaves the safezone in the prologue:

That there are living survivors in Heartslabyul trapped there under the rule of their infected housewarden, which—by extension—likely means the situation may be the same in other dorms

That both Deuce Spade and Grim—who he hadn’t seen since the outbreak and assumed were dead—were actually alive and MIA.

And that basically kickstarts the rest of the story !! The main group infiltrates different dorms in the hopes of reconnecting with any survivors, all while trying to solve the mystery of their old friends’ whereabouts :)

Now the reason why a good chunk of this au was pretty much kept under wraps was for one main reason specifically: I had zero clue how to present it.

My initial thought was “oh!! Fanfic :3” and then it scrambled into “…comic? Animation? No?? Both?? Neither??”

…and then it kinda just sat there. I had the story, I had the idea, I had the biggest brainrot, but no way to properly explain or show it. And then I got the thought that plagues me every single time—at least once—I join a fandom: make it a video game.

At first, i wasn’t going to. But then it clicked into place just a bit too well and the ideas kept coming together and it wouldn’t stop and now we’re here :3

More specifically, Dead Casino is gonna be portrayed as a desktop game ^^ (i took like two game dev classes, sue me /j)

here’s some ideas for different mechanics I thought of including !! They’re all on my spam blog, but I have a third blog in the works rn where I’ll have all the info organized eventually :3

[1], [2], [3]

And here’s some irl doodles I’ve made for this!! These are beta designs and the like for different characters and stuff !! (Tw for body horror, knifes and guns, lmk if I need to add any more warnings ^^)

[torchickentacos]

Slightly tangential to my last reblog (in the sense that 'if you hate something then is it actually bad or is it just not for you'), but sometimes I see posts like "I hate when fandoms focus too much on shipping*" or "I hate when people make headcanons that have zero basis in canon, he would not fucking say that" or "I hate that people only ever write the same 5 cliche AUs" and it's like, idk. I think some of you guys just don't really like the things that fandoms tend to be built on (and that's okay). If you hate everything about something, then maybe you just aren't its audience, or maybe you need to find other ways to engage with it that are more enjoyable for you. The solution is never 'less people need to enjoy this specific thing because it annoys me personally', though.

*putting an asterisk on this one because there are interesting discussions to be had here, but none of those (productive) discussions are 'people should just be less interested in shipping because I said so', in my opinion. And of course opinions are allowed! You are TOTALLY well within your rights to hate the things listed above, but people are allowed to love them, too. The secret to a good fandom experience is to encourage the parts you enjoy rather than to try and discourage the parts that you don't enjoy.

[some-stars]

i spent yesterday rereading all my old fic that i hadn't read in years and years, including the unfinished stuff, and man, i know i'm two fandoms deep in Soft Shit and Happy Endings now, and it's not that i don't love that stuff because i really do, but i forgot how deep my love for toxic complicated nonsense runs and now i kinda miss that.

like ten years ago i wrote 10k words of an Oz fic (AU where beecher didn't fall for it in s6 and stayed out, so two years later keller breaks out and shows up at his house) and then didn't look at it again until yesterday, and that shit was not only better than i remember, it was satisfying. i mean not completely satisfying bc it stopped halfway through but ohhhhhh my god, the fucked up self-destructive each-other-destructive painful wildly passionate deliciousness of it all........i know IWTV could fill this hole for me but i wouldn't DREAM of trying to write fic for a show that genuinely brilliant. like what would i even add.

and i used to do that all the time!! like if you go back before 2020 on my ao3 page it's at LEAST 50% ambiguous-to-sad endings. and my WIPs from before then are also wonderfully Tangled. genuinely i miss it so much?? but i have absolutely ZERO interest in writing anything sad in deadpool fandom, i don't think. so i just gotta wait i guess. someday...............

[laismoura-art]

You don't talk about them even though I know you have opinions on the overall character, so... Sektor!!

1. Why do you like or dislike this character? (both MK9 and MK1 because I know you prefer one over the other).

For the next ones, you can only do MK1!Sektor if you want since I know you go with her!

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like? (I already know you hate when people pit her against Sareena in ship wars, so is there anything positive you like? 😅)

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

I'm overall curious about Sektor in your AU!

Hey Rasta! Interesting choice!👀 Thanks for the opportunity to talk about ma girl, Sektor!

LET'S GOOOOOOO!!

MK1 Sektor ⚙️

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

Probably for all the reasons most folks dislike her, lmao!

MK1 Sektor is nothing like OG Sektor! I don't like OG Sektor, so I don't care that he was replaced (especially by a woman, sue me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) Plus, her being different is kind of the point of being a Multiverse story, we came here to see different, and she sure is different!

She's not pure evil like her OG self, and thus not beyond redemption! Sure, she's really, really, really mean, and has evil tendencies, but she needs to be encouraged to act on them.

I honestly believe that if she had better people surrounding her (instead of evil MK1 Bi-Han and her father) she would be a better person, and I like that about her, cause unredeemable characters aren’t really my type, lmao! 

Oh yeah, and in my AU, both she and Bi-Han are good people (I was already physically incapable of making evil Bi-Han, now I feel I’ll be physically uncapable of making evil MK1 Sektor, lol). Now though he is still the person she spends the most time with, he won’t bring out the worst in her like he does in canon! (They are still a reeeeeeally mean duo, tho, but they have a good heart😅💕)

But even as a villain, she's still an entertaining villain! She's a cartoonish villain who wants to do evil with her pookie, and they are most likely the duo that runs away giggling after causing some mischief. And I know that's a bit silly and doesn't appeal to everyone, but it sure appeals to me much more than "rotten to the core villain with zero charisma" that was OG Sektor (to me)

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

I did sprinkle my answer with some of my thoughts on MK9 Sektor, but just not to be entirely unfair to him:

I do love to make him the big bad guy in all my fics, and I make sure to make you hate him as much as I do!

He's a real unredeemable character to me and I have zero interest to write him as anything else. He lost me when he condemned Harumi, Satoshi, Hanzo, Cyrax, Bi-Han and Tomas and made Kuai Liang's life hell.

On top of it, I hardly find him charismatic. MK1 Sektor has some real energy and a fun personality, but MK9 Sektor can't even make me fear him even when he has one of the most terrifying goals!

6/10 would kill without hesitation

2. Favourite canon thing about this character?

Honestly, I really like the person she is when MK1 Bi-Han is not around cause, like I said, he brings the worst in her!

I think a lot about her interaction with Khameleon!

She was still VERY arrogant (can’t blame Bi-Han for that, lol) but quite the noble warrior! She had Khameleon's back the whole time and made sure to save Khameleon's Umgadi sisters!

She was only temporarily allied to Khameleon but in that short time she was a true ride or die and fought fiercely for her!

I think "ride or die" is her defining trait and I love that it's part of her nature, and not only something exclusive to Bi-Han. Like, "she's loyal cause she has feelings for him" no, she's loyal to him cause she's a loyal person!

(And a little speculation here, if I may: the reason Sektor went after Harumi so quickly even when Cyrax insisted she should be left out of the fight was because she saw herself in Harumi.

Harumi is also a loyal and fierce protector, and she wouldn't back down when Kuai needed her. Sektor knew that if their roles were reversed, she would react the exact same way and would be as much of a threat as Harumi was!

It was a true game recognising game moment, lol!)

3. Least favourite canon thing about this character?

Her boyfriend, lol💀

Look, I love Sekhan as an evil couple, they match each other's freak, they are goofy and silly, and as long as they STAY LIKE THIS, and don’t become a real threat to my girls, Harumi and Cyrax, by starting the “body horror factory,” I’m good with them! 

But I can't help but still wish they were my “mean but with heart of gold” duo ✊🏾😔

They did make a little cameo on my Umgadi Girls fic, and I really liked how they came out! I think this is my favourite way of writing them!

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

Fanarts? Lol🙃

I’m still to explore beyond Tumblr to see what the rest of the Fandom is doing, but here in the neighbourhood… hmmm, I guess any positive take is valid, and they come mostly from the Sekhan part of the Fandom, so though I don’t love this ship, I find some joy in it, especially when it’s more comedy focused!

They are really a funny couple, and I think folks are sleeping on it!

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

I saw some folks saying she was being a “hypocrite” when she said Kuai had "forgotten the meaning of family” but my headcanon/theory/character analysis is that she was actually being cunning and trying to create some animosity between Tanya and Kuai.

We know she turned her back on her mother, and we know Kuai has EVERY reason to be mad at Bi-Han. We all know this. But Tanya doesn't!

For Tanya, Kuai is the guy putting his own brother in second place, while Sektor is the devoted woman doing everything she can to rescue her man!

Huh, I wonder which one this grieving widow would be more inclined towards in case the two had any major disagreement and she had to side with one!

Ma girl is slyyyyy!

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

Best friend, best girlfriend, you name it! Either way, I say it's Khameleon!

I know, obvious choice! But hear me out!

I keep saying that Bi-Han brings out the worst in Sektor, and a better company could encourage her to be her better self! And I say Khameleon is the one!

Sektor wants recognition! She's a genius and wants to be acknowledged as such! We can tell cause she's always flexing her armour and her skills!

And who were the two people who praised her? Bi-Han, sure. But also:

Here's a genuine compliment! One of the few she gets! And we can tell it's genuine cause Khameleon has no reason whatsoever to lie to her. Heck, she doesn’t even have a reason to compliment her! She views Sektor as the enemy!

Sektor probably realised that, too, given how she acts later. She saves Khameleon from Chaos!Geras and then teases her in the most friendly and heartfelt way possible!

No, seriously, just take a look at this body language!

Girl has her mask covering her whole face, and she still manages to have a visible shit eating grin!

Praise this little shit, lmao!

Tell me these two wouldn't have the best relationship ever! The cutest friendly rivalry!

CyberSaurian, my beloved!❤️💚

And I'm not done with them! Cause after Sektor teases her, Khameleon drops this gem:

Thank you, Khameleon! That's what I've been saying!

Sektor wastes her talents with the likes of Bi-Han!

She could be doing so much good, but instead she was almost executed because she chose to side with him! She could be Grandmaster, but she lost that chance when she chose to set Mr Sleeping Beauty free instead!

Bi-Han drags her down, and I think Khameleon could help her see that!

A little fun fact about my AU, since you're interested:

I plan to have Khameleon and Sektor meet there too!

I'm still working on the details but the general idea is to have Sektor and Bi-Han (and Cyrax too) travelling to Outworld cause he got "infected" with an unknown source of magic (cause I want Noob Saibot in my AU) and they are looking for a cure.

The Umgadi girls invite Sektor to train with them so she has something to do while Bi-Han is being treated. There she meets Khameleon and though they don't get along at first (cause Sektor is being, well, herself, lol) they eventually get to like each other!

The reactions are what I'm looking forward the most, lmao:

Sektor: I must say, Khameleon, you... are not as terrible as I thought you would be.

Khameleon: Was that supposed to be a compliment?

Cyrax: The highest...

Bi-Han: How nice of you to get a girlfriend while I was dying.

Sektor: You were just dying a bit, don't be a drama queen.

Bi-Han: >:O

(She teases bit she was worried sick about him, lol! Also I'm still deciding if I'll go platonic or romantic with CyberSaurian)

Harumi: I've been waiting 12 years to finally get a hug from you and I'm still waiting, but Khameleon gets one in a week??

Sektor: I didn't hug her, she fell unconscious and I caught her.

Harumi: I felt unconscious on you once. You dropped me.

@thegrimoiresvoice would you be interested in my take on Sektor?👀

[mcytblrconfessions]

*sighs in sadness* Ocean Queen Lizzie you were too good a character to be released onto the masses who couldn't characterize you well in fanfiction to save your life :(

The joy your story brought me (self-proclaimed number one Ocean Queen fan /hj) is immense, but it does not cancel out the multitudes of fanfiction flattening you into a hollow shell of yourself who only exists as an extension of the men in your life, clogging the LDShadowLady fandom tag and making it nigh-impossible to fin the (rare) fic in which Lizzie is in-character

And trust me, I know. My experiences are born out of pain and sorrow. Deep in the clutches of hyperfixation, I checked the LDShadowLady tag several times every day for months, no filters. I looked at every fic in the tag, and the backlog of fics. I read every fic in the tag, with only a few exceptions for the most truly unstomachable fic. Even as my hyperfixation loosened, I still checked the LDShadowLady tag often, and scrolled through the backlog. I still read every Lizzie centric fic I can find, and a lot that isn't. I still am on a constant search for good Lizzie fic (please: anyone want to recommend any fics? I'm sure there's stuff I'm missing/missed/forgot to bookmark! she doesn't have to be the main character, just significant!)

I have gazed into the abyss. I have absorbed the scope of it. I have written fic on my own.

And yet: the problem is less with the lack of Lizzie fics, and more with the bad ones, the ones that don't actually feature her in any real capacity, which becomes easy to see once you've read a lot of them noticed the pattern, just a combination of sidelining, of mischaracterization, and mischaracterization by omission, that trap that is so easy to fall into.

I can forgive fandom for this to an extent. No fic writer is perfect, this is about the collective patterns. But after a certain point, it starts becoming harder to ignore: the way she is written into fics only to warp around c!Jimmy (sometimes other male characters) with zero regard for her interiority, her agency, her struggles, her potential, in fics that give male side characters these things.

The way she is ignored varies. Sometimes it is the most blatant examples: she is put in a situation in which multiple canon traits/opinions/experiences of hers would obviously be relevant, but all are ignored except supportive sister. Sometimes it is more subtle: it iisn't a plot hole that her being a supportive sister/caring/"strong woman girlboss" (in the way that doesn't actually give her any agency or depth or plot importance, she's still a flat character only there for support, but actually we only write her as a personw with no interior depth or anything interesting bc she's just so cool and competent and perfect there aren't any problems that give us reasons to focus on her or give her like, a character arc or something) is the only thing that comes up in the au, but the fact that the author didn't find anything else about her interesting or worthy of show, never considered showing her in more depth, giving her an arc, giving her choices to make, the fact that over and over again authors decide that the only reason to show her is if she's supporting a guy, grates a whole fucking lot. Mostly, it is more subtle but once you see it you will never stop unseeing it. I try to repeat it but I just sound like a broken record.

Am I going insane for noticing this when nobody else seems to? I worry that, even being mad mostly at the trend and not the individual writers, I am still somehow being too unfair to them. I check my line of thought over and over. Then, once again, I am reading a fic and I can't stop thinking about how it's another fic in the pattern, and I try to find something that isn't and it takes me pages and pages, and I am so angry again. Death by a thousand pinpricks. Driven insane by a thousand lackluster Lizzie portrayals.

It's hard not to feel crazy. People like the Ocean Queen! People don't dislike her character! She just slowly gets flattened, over and over. Never any interest in her depths. (yes I am ocean punning at a time like this)

I am awash in a sea of misery. Every day I think of her and I wish for a world where people liked her better. Where she was the character with a million fics exploring her potential. I think about it and I think about her and I think about my fic for her and the good fics I've read for her and I open another fic where Lizzie is tagged and I hope.

(The pain these fics bring me is immense but the joy I feel about the character is greater, at least. Mostly I think about that. Two sides to everything, how unfortunate/lucky)

Ocean Queen I love you.

[tideswept]

🍄🍬❄️

Ahoy other nonnie! o7

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

mmmmmn I'll do three for. Reasons. :)

obikin: Obi-Wan is the truly unhinged one in the relationship. Sorry. He puts up a good front but I thoroughly believe that man would, if the circumstances aligned, out-unhinge Anakin in every conceivable metric, and he'd somehow make it all appear reasonable. Totally what he had to do at that moment. There was no better choice available.

jonelias: if "soulmates" existed in TMA, Elias would have had zero compunction about killing his soulmate if necessary. (Though he'd simply avoid or politely reject them if it weren't.) And if they kept being reincarnated? He'd still maintain the same stance. Not interested. Not useful to him. But Jon, Jon is the one he chooses, and that's far more meaningful to him than something as insignificant as a soulmate. (and if Jon also has a soulmate, well... he'll deal with that in whatever way he must.) (And I don't mean he'd automatically kill them!) (Unless he personally finds them unworthy) (then all bets are off)

hartwin: Eggsy is the sane, practical one. Harry has gone too long being the wild card, being too good, too lucky, too independent. Harry overly relies on money, on technology, on social cachet to ease his way through what little of every day life he must go through in between Kingsman and missions for Kingsman. That isn't to say Harry is incapable of being a competent adult, it's that he hasn't needed to for decades, and he's redirected his energy to the spy life. He can charm anyone... but he's rusty at actually having relationships. At building a life with someone. At having someone else in his space. In having anything even remotely resembling a work/life balance. Eggsy might think Harry is someone to emulate and learn from, but to Harry, Eggsy legit is the better half of their relationship.

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

I don't think Obi-Wan Kenobi is a slut. 🤷 I think it's way more likely that he's a virgin. (Though I can and will write him either way, and with many other varying levels of experience/enthusiasm/interest in sex, because fanfic is fun like that. :D)

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

uh damn that's hard??? There's a lot of valid answers that could go here. So. Um. I'm going to cheat :D I'd love a GFFA fanfic that is mostly focused around what happened when Anakin became a Force Ghost, and his reunion with Obi-Wan. And it could take place across different timelines and flashbacks or w/e (that's what I've been thinking for a fic) but the main emphasis is their new situation, a fourth (master/padawan, generals, enemies) iteration of their ever-shifting dynamic, and one that I really never see explored. And I'd love to see @darthwillies tackle it and make me cry. my second dream plot is that I'd love to see @underacalicosky tackle an obikin werewolf or witch AU! thinking modern day, Anakin having been raised alone, either unaware that he wasn't the only one or knowing that there were more [werewolves/witches] out there but finding that they were unwilling to even go near him or would attack him unprovoked when he approached. So he's twitchy, wary, a total asshole at the slightest thing that sets him off, but oh does he want to learn. And of course he's ridiculously powerful/a prodigy and how did he even survive this long by himself, where did he even come from, and Obi-Wan knows everyone is asking themselves this, maybe he volunteers to teach Anakin what he needs to know, maybe he's ordered. But none of that matters if he can't get Anakin to trust him first.

📚 [ask meme!]

🍓 [quick jump to ask inbox]

[99corentine]

How To Write Good by Corentine

THE DRAFTING PROCESS, PART 1/2

Hello, people were interested in some writing tips by me so I, uh, sort of kind of cranked out a writing guide in a few hours. I’m not sure if this will be a very comprehensive or helpful guide but let’s give it a try!

⭐ Starting disclaimers: Please remember as with all things that my method is not necessarily the best method, everyone is different and over time you’ll find your own process.

I write romance, so my advice is skewed towards writing that and I’m not sure how helpful it will be for gen fic. I publish fanfic chapter by chapter to AO3 so it’s also skewed to someone doing the same, not someone writing a full novel they want to get published. 

I’m going to be using GOL HAH DOV (GHD) for writing examples because, well, it’s a finished longfic so it’s as good a reference as any, but obviously GHD is not everyone’s cup of tea. I’ll also occasionally reference Tooth for a Tooth (T4T) which apologies is very far from finished, but the Baldur’s Gate 3 fandom is vastly different to the Skyrim one, so it’s useful to cross-compare them.

Also worth bearing in mind: I have been writing fanfiction since I was about 13, and I’m now 33. That’s 20 years of experience. Do you know what I wrote when I was 13? Hot garbage. Writing is a learned skill that, much like playing a musical instrument or learning literally any other craft, you must put time and effort into to improve.

However although ‘practice makes perfect’ is fundamentally true, that’s also kind of lame advice. So here is what I personally do, which may be helpful in figuring out what you want to do. 

STEP ONE: YOU NEED AN IDEA FIRST DUMMY

Think of a fic idea. Probably you have lots of vague ideas. As I’m trying to turn something from a daydream into an actual writing project, I tend to ask myself these questions:

⭐Who is it about?⭐

Pick your pairing, romantic or otherwise. Think about what you like about the character and what traits you want to emphasise in your writing. If you’re writing about fan character x fan character, what makes them go well together? What causes tension between them?

If you’re writing fan character x original character, do remember that your readers are here for the fan character, not for your OC. There is no getting around this, your OC is not what brings people to the fic. GHD’s Chrysanthe was largely intended as a blank slate, quite literally, I made him an amnesiac because the point of the story was Miraak not Chrysanthe. 

Over time I was able to shape him into something more distinctive (softly-spoken, stoic, paladin-like, secret tricksy side only Miraak brings out, gets more dragon-like as the story progresses) but that was a gradual thing. Your readers will hopefully come to love your OC as you do, but it takes time for them to get invested. I’m very grateful that people did come to root for Chrysanthe – but make no mistake, if the story had no Miraak in it, people wouldn’t be reading it. Your OC is always a vehicle for the fan character.

⭐What are the overarching themes of the story?⭐

A cohesive story has a theme that repeats throughout, and picking one early on will let you write with that theme in mind. As an example, the themes of GHD are:

Soulmates / we were destined to meet each other

There’s no-one else like me / you and I are the only real ones here

One’s a hero one’s a villain

Zero to hero / hero becomes progressively more badass

Redemption arc but the villain is never fully redeemed – for GHD this turned into the repetition of Miraak’s theme he’ll never be pure but for you he’ll try and later Chrysanthe’s I love you exactly as you are

Your own themes might be something like best friends who don’t realise they’ve been in love this whole time or can’t live with you can’t live without you. Tropes count towards this too, so something like soulmates, Modern Coffee Shop AU, hanahaki, all of that stuff is a story theme.

⭐What does this fic do that other fics like it don’t?⭐

GOL HAH DOV was sort of easy mode in this regard because there aren’t many fics featuring Miraak at all, so writing anything was already doing something different. Of those existing fics, I wanted to see more where Miraak was evil and scary, and you should be the change you want to see in the world (of fanfic), so I decided to write it myself. I get a lot of comments on Miraak’s personality, so I assume this is mostly what makes GHD stand out!

I’ll use T4T as a contrasting example, because Skyrim is old and Miraak is niche, but Baldur’s Gate 3 is new/popular and Astarion is a fan favourite. That means there’s a veritable sea of fic about him, so what can you write that will stand out from the many, many other fics out there? It doesn’t have to be the only one of its kind or anything, but it does need to have something special about it.

You’ll want to either go for a strong theme or trope (i.e. soulmates, magical spell curse, we’re both monsters), or change the setting (canon divergence, ‘what if X happened instead?’, or even outright alternate universe and a brand new plot). Personally, I choose to follow the source material but go off-script. I gotta say, nothing makes me sadder than seeing plot and dialogue lifted straight from a game with zero changes made to it. That’s a personal preference obviously, but I think if you write a fic it should strive to do something different to the rest.

⭐Do I have enough enthusiasm to finish it?⭐

This is more applicable to longfic, but you really need to be in love with a story to see it through to the end. Be realistic with yourself, how much free time and energy you have – if you start it, do you think you can finish it?

I have a whole planning process (detailed later) and sometimes I start planning out an idea just to realise I don’t really have the enthusiasm to actually write the whole thing. This is fine! Even just planning is still a writing exercise, and it might spark some different ideas.

Once you have your idea, and you’re confident you’re going to actually write it… then for the love of all that is holy, do not share it in detail with anyone. You can pitch an idea to see if people will be interested but if you go into specifics about story events or certain scenes? You basically get the endorphins from having ‘created’ it, only you haven’t actually created it, and now you’ve had the chemical pay-off you probably never will. Keep your ideas to yourself until you’ve actually written them.

STEP TWO: WRITE THAT DOWN

In terms of writing software, I use Scrivener, which is a paid-for software but is not subscription based (I wouldn’t pay continually for software unless I was reliably writing every day, and sometimes I go ages without being in the mood to write). Scriv’s word processor isn’t the most intuitive thing, but I like its organisation features. This is what a work in progress looks like for me:

That’s essentially a folder (the story) containing a bunch of word documents (the chapters). You could break it down even further and have a chapter folder with each document being individual scenes, then stitch it together later - if writing is a daunting process for you, it’s useful to break it down into small, manageable chunks. You can do this in other software obviously, I just find Scrivener the most visually pleasing.

Set up your writing document, and let’s get to planning what we’re actually going to write!

...Apparently tumblr has a word limit I've exceeded, so I'll write the next bit separately. Here's PART TWO.

[whysamwhy123]

Huh. The first OrangeHook fic I wrote now has the most hits out of anything I've written in the last two years. Weird.

I guess you never really know which fics are gonna take off. But still, this is hard for me to wrap my head around. I figured nothing would ever overtake the previous top dog, since that was for a very popular pairing (at the time) and also I wrote it as part of a fandom event, so naturally it was gonna have a few more eyeballs on it than usual. For a rarepair fic, of a pairing that's almost completely dead (the 'almost' being there due to the tireless work of my good buddy Dah, single-handedly keeping the OrangeHook train a-rollin' in 2024 *blows a kiss*) to overtake that, and still be getting traction here and there after over a year, is kinda nuts.

I have a weird relationship with that fic, in general. When I posted it, I really wasn't happy with it. It has Problems, LOL. The more time that passes though, I've kinda warmed to it more and more. It still has those Problems, for sure, but it came together pretty good in the end, I think? Probably some of my best dialogue, at least. That fic was only supposed to be two scenes - the opening scene with Best Friends, and the Awkward Hotel Room Seduction Scene - but it kinda ballooned as I was writing it, and I kept adding more and more. I don't think I realised at the time that OrangeHook was gonna become My Pairing for a good while. But it certainly did.

I'm in a...weird place, at the moment, regarding writing. Well. I don't know if I'm even qualified to say that, because the short version is - I ain't writing no' mo'. Haven't finished a fic, or even written more than a couple words, in over two months. Considering I was averaging one fic a month since January 2023, that's a downgrade for sure. This definitely isn't one of my usual writing slumps. I have Ideas (Such Ideas!) but zero motivation to write any of them. This isn't fandom's fault, to be clear. I do feel very out-of-touch and like the fandom's passed me by, but that's just because I don't watch AEW anymore because *almost falls back into old habits and launches into one of my annoying hater rants that I used to do all the goddamn time before I realised how lame that was and made myself act my age for once* reasons, and so I'm not particularly interested/invested in any of the popular pairings these days. The only pairings I do care about are ones like OrangeHook - microscopically small rarepairs where it's literally just me and one other person, and that's it. As much as I adore those folks (Gato <3 Dah <3), it's hard to find motivation when you know there's no audience waiting for you. Makes you feel like there's no point, y'know? Doesn't help that all of my ideas these days are goofy, self-indulgent AUs or bizarre crackfics. Even if I could put pen to paper, so to speak, I wouldn't exactly be giving the people what they want, LOL.

After I failed to get my Halloween fic done (it was, predictably, a goofy, self-indulgent OrangeHook AU about Jim falling under the sway of Hook, who's an incubus. Y'all are welcome that I didn't put that out into the world, LOL), I kinda figured that I might be done with writing again. Before January of last year, I hadn't written a word in years. I gave up on writing after some Bad Stuff happened. It felt like a gift to be able to do it again, after so much time. Kinda sucks to think I might be back to just Not Being Able To Do It At All again. Kinda really sucks.

There is this one idea. I've had it rattling around in my brain for a long time. It actually started as a Hookhausen fic (remember them? Where does the time go?), but I ended up adapting it to be OrangeHook over time. I have a lot of scattered ideas for scenes, bits of dialogue, and a pretty strong sense of what The Point would be. I did toy with the idea of starting it a while back (or at least trying to) and making it my swansong for the fandom/my writing in general. One last self-indulgent rarepair fic that no one cares about, and then I could peace out. To draw a line under things, y'know? Tie a little bow on this whole writing experiment of mine and then move on to...I don't know. Something else. Nothing? *shrugs* But that fic would be a big undertaking, at least for me. Would probably take a long time. A lot of work. And I ain't exactly drowning in free time. Plus, the aforementioned not-having-written-a-word-in-ages thing. I don't know.

We'll see, I guess.

If you read all of this, first of all - I am so very sorry, LOL. Second, thank you. If you're someone who's read anything I've put out there in the last two years, thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. There's been...a lot of ups and downs, but overall, I'm really glad that I was able to get back into this, even if it didn't last too long. I'm pretty proud of a lot of the fics I managed to write, and while I know I was never the most popular girl in school, I hope that some of my silly stories entertained you. Made you laugh, or distracted you from the awfulness of reality for a spell. God knows, that's what all of your fics, and this fandom in general, did for me. Y'all are so nice. Creative, supportive, funny. It's kinda comforting, knowing that the fandom is still going strong. You kids have fun! Maybe this is goodbye, or maybe I'll channel that wrestler mentality and have 'One more match!' and then I'll retire. Who knows? But regardless, I'm glad I got to do this. No regrets. Well, maybe some, LOL. But for the most part...yeah. Shit was fun, yo. I did the damn thing.

OK, I'll shut up now, I promise *awkwardly finger guns my way out of the room*

[cozm0]

𖦹 ׂ 𓈒 ⋆ ۪ characters i write for ₊˚⊹

Welcome to my "characters i write for" list! Please don't ask for characters that are not on the list, they're not there for a reason. More characters will be available & added to the list whenever I feel like it or feel comfortable enough to add them. Some characters may also be taken away depending on how I feel ! (back to -> NAVIGATION)

UPDATE : As of right now I have made the decision to only write for the characters I have under BSD & Genshin. This is partially because I have never taken requests so I just wanna give myself a smaller list to focus on but mainly because I have kinda lost interest in those 2 fandoms as of right now. I may put them in the bottom list later but for now I'll just leave this notice up here. OR I may also replace them with the Twisted Wonderland characters (but again that makes a longer list so idk-)

Bungo Stray Dogs (bsd)

Osamu Dazai

Chuuya Nakahara

Ryūnosuke Akutagawa

My Hero Academia (mha/bnha)

Hitoshi Shinso

Shota Aizawa / Eraser Head

Shoto Todoroki

Creepypasta

Ticci Toby

Eyeless Jack

Bloody Painter

Genshin Impact

Diluc Ragnvindr

Kaeya Alberich

Xiao

Zhongli

Baizhu

Kamisato Ayato

Scaramouche / Wanderer

Kaveh

Al Haitham

Freminet

Neuvillette

Potential future charecters

"Currently I do not write for these characters whether because I think I will be overwhelmed with the already big list of other characters, because I don't fully understand how to write those characters (which tbh I don't fully understand and/or over think most of the others but shh jxchfu-) and/or I just don't feel like it at this current point in time. Also non oft his charecters are guaranteed to be added etheir but it's a possibility. Their also not in any particular order"

Shikanoin Heizou (Genshin Impact)

Ga ming (Genshin Impact)

Albedo (Genshin Impact)

Kaedehara Kazuha (Genshin Impact)

Lyney (Genshin Impact)

Wriothesley (Genshin Impact)

Thoma (Genshin Impact)

Sebastian Michaelis (Black Butler)

Malleus Draconia (Twisted Wonderland)

Idia Shroud (Twisted Wonderland)

Riddle Rosehearts (Twisted Wonderland)

Floyd Leech (Twisted Wonderland)

Lilia Vanrouge (Twisted Wonderland)

Silver (Twisted Wonderland)

Ace Trappola (Twisted Wonderland)

Deuce Spade (Twisted Wonderland)

Leviathan (Obey Me)

Belphegor (Obey Me)

Satan (Obey Me)

Hua Cheng (Heaven Official's Blessing/Tgcf)

Hawks (Mha/Bnha)

Present Mic (Mha/Bnha)

Peter Parker / Spiderman (Mcu)

"Human"/Android! Bonnie (this will problem be from my Fnaf au that I will tallk about at some point or another once I flesh it out more)

Other "human"/android! Animatronics, I haven't decided yet (Fnaf au)

Vincent/Purpled guy (a mix of mainly the like rebornica / old fanon Purple guy + like my own version from the Fnaf au I mention on top)

Some if not all the Fnaf night guards from my AU

Hiccup Horrendous (Httyd)

Jing Yuan (Hsr)

Dan Heng / Dan Heng • Imbibitor Lunae (Hsr)

Blade (Hsr)

Dr. Ratio (Hsr)

Aventurine (Hsr)

Sunday (Hsr)

Boothill (Hsr))

Luocha (Hsr)

Welt (Hsr)

Laito Sakamaki (Diabolik Lovers)

Shuu Sakamaki (Diabolik Lovers)

Reiji Sakamaki (Diabolik Lovers)

Tōru Kirishima (The Yakuza's Guide to Babysitting)

Jiyan (Wuthering Waves)

Scar (Wuthering Waves)

Mortefi (Wuthering Waves)

Calcharo (Wuthering Waves)

Aalto (Wuthering Waves)

Lingyang (Wuthering Waves)

Wise (Zenless Zone Zero)

Von Lycaon (Zenless Zone Zero)

Levy (Path To Nowhere)

Gene (Pdh/MyStreet)

Kieran Valentine (Monster High)