#and i think a lot of it's the coping methods i picked up after it. which are very useful for Right Now.

[orcelito]

It's a little interesting seeing the difference between 2016 and 2024 elections in my own reaction to it.

Like one hand, it's been Painfully similar. The horror at seeing the numbers turn out like they did. The feeling of dread gripping my chest. The fear. The backdrop of just pure *tiredness* throughout the day. Awful day. It's a miasma.

But in the 8 years since then, my life has dramatically changed. I went from having no deaths of anyone I really knew to losing like a third of my entire family. I've gotten very, very good at rolling with unexpected punches. I've had to be.

So with this now... it sucks. It really does. I'm so tired and resigned. I Really don't want to go back to how things were under him. But even with the horror and the resignation... idk. Maybe part of it is the fact that I've lived through a Trump presidency before, so I'm already familiar with the continuous monotonous despair that was his presidency. I'm not scared of an unknown evil. I'm resigned to the evil I already know and scared of what else he may do.

And after the completely unexpected loss of my father earlier this year... where I learned he was in the hospital and then just a bit over a day later he was dead. It was a kind of extreme life upheaval that I'm unlikely to experience that way ever again. So after having to roll with *that* punch... and having already rolled with the punch of a Trump election...

I'm tired. It feels like a bad dream. Feels like the bad path of a video game. The Wrong path. But Even Then... I'm not despairing. Not because I'm not scared, or because I don't think it's a horrible thing to have happened. But it's another awful fastball that life has thrown at me, and I have gotten very, very good at coping with those.

[kaiijo]

ok. bllk and jealousy rate. how jealous can they get over their gf and what do they do to cope lmao

HOW JEALOUS IS HE? — [BLUE LOCK]

characters: isagi yoichi, bachira meguru, itoshi rin, itoshi sae, kunigami rensuke, nagi seishiro, mikage reo, oliver aiku content: gn! reader (request says gf but reader is gender neutral) notes: some of these are lowkey toxic, minor spoilers for kunigami’s character arc, nagi is taller than reader

most jealous: bachira, rin, reo 

bachira meguru ✶

bachira has many, many insecurities. growing up isolated and without many friends, he is more possessive of those he’s close to, which obviously includes you. he just doesn’t want to lose you, which manifests itself in jealousy over anyone he perceives as a threat to your relationship

bachira gets really clingy when he’s jealous. he thinks that inserting himself into the situation, sometimes literally wedging himself between you and the other person. he usually chooses to drape himself over you, nuzzling into your neck and speaking low enough that only you hear, trying his best to divert your attention. third-wheeling is pretty uncomfortable for the other person, especially with the smiling sneer bachira’s shooting at them, so they make a quick irish exit 

itoshi rin ✶

an egoist to his very core, rin can get very jealous. while he’s very sure of himself in nearly every other part of his life, he knows that he is not an ideal partner a lot of the time, though he’ll never admit it. he’s not the most expressive or the most patient, and he’s sure that there are better partners for you out there. 

when rin’s jealous, it’s a silent but deadly thing. like when he’s locked in on the ball in a game, his focus you and his ‘competitor’ is unwavering. he stalks over to stand behind you, his chest bumping right up against your back, and he snarls, “what the hell do you want, you mediocrity?” usually the other person backs off after seeing rin’s bone-chilling glare but if they’re bold enough to answer back, rin bares his teeth and is poised to strike. it’s probably best if you diffuse the situation quickly before it gets uglier  

mikage reo ✶

we already know how jealous reo was over nagi so it’s safe to say that he’s definitely very jealous. having been bored with the world and other people for so long, he’s thrilled when you two get together. it makes his very protective of you and he wants to be one of the most, if not the most, special person in your life. 

reo can go a couple of ways when he feels jealous over someone else but it think his primary response is to tear down the person methodically. he tilts his head a little, looks the person up and down, and notes everything about their appearance — hair, skin, clothes (including brand and cost) and criticizes every little thing. it’s a strategic move in his opinion, using observational skills and knowledge he had given his upbringing to pick apart the other person. he also might make some underhanded comment that includes that he has a black card 

less jealous: isagi, kunigami, sae 

isagi yoichi ✶

he definitely gets jealous from time to time but he doesn’t feel the need to act on it a lot. he’s pretty mature and for the most part level-headed (plus his ability to piece together future events helps him keep his cool a lot). this doesn’t mean that he isn’t jealous 

when isagi is jealous, he’s sulky. he won’t take immediate action and watch from afar, arms crossed and a little pouty. he tries to look as dejected and as ‘wet-cat pathetic’ as possible to make you feel bad and come over to comfort him. when you inevitably do, looping your arm through his and kissing his cheek, he can’t help but smirk at the other person like a cat who go the cream 

kunigami rensuke ✶

i debated where to put kunigami since there are ‘two sides’ to him — pre- and post-wildcard. pre-wild card kunigami is definitely a lot less bothered; he trusts you 100% and is 100% confident and secure in your relationship and himself. post-wild card kunigami is less chill and more forceful. he’s not a hero anymore but even as he plays a more ‘villainous’ role in soccer, he won’t cross that line in your relationship. he’s still very secure in you and himself, but he’s more protective of your relationship. definitely a ‘i trust you/us but it’s other people i’m worried about’ kind of guy

when pre-wild card kunigami got jealous, he won’t act in the moment and will talk to you about it afterwards, in a private setting. open lines of communication were important to him and working out problems like this. post-wildcard kunigami is all stormy looks and intimidation. like rin, he also stands behind you but in less actively aggressive way and more just to be threatening. it’s 95% effective and the 5% of times it doesn’t work, kunigami is not above muscling the other person away 

itoshi sae ✶

i thought about putting sae in the ‘most jealous’ section but i just think that he is someone whose jealousy simmer just beneath his apathetic surface. he sees most other people as beneath him and believes that they are not worthy of speaking to you, let alone hitting on you, but because he’s sees them as so beneath him, he can’t be bothered half the time to do anything since they’re simply not worth it. he gets the most jealous when it’s people who he can potentially view as equals, like other professional athletes 

when he’s jealous, sae literally just pretends they don’t exist, only talking to you. if the other person tries to interject, he sends them a sideways glare — the only acknowledgment of their existence — and then turns away to continue whatever conversation, suggesting that you both get away from the other person as quickly as possible. if ignoring the person doesn’t work, sae doesn’t shy away from spewing vitriol at the other person

least jealous: nagi, oliver, michael

nagi seishiro ✶

simply put, being jealous is a hassle to nagi. it makes him too hot and too annoyed for him to want to feel it so he suppresses the feeling a lot. nagi’s height is already intimidating enough for most people so they don’t approach you when they see you two together but that isn’t a deterrent to everyone

when nagi gets jealous, he does one of two things: just gives a thousand-yard stare that freaks people out or he gets whiny and clingy. his stare is eerie and silent, and the lightness of his eyes doesn’t help it. he towers over you like some cryptid companion. when he gets whiny and clingy, nagi tugs at your sleeve and asks drily, “can we go yet? why are you still talking to them?”

oliver aiku ✶

sigh… oliver is undoubtedly someone who thinks and knows he’s the shit. with so many women and men alike fawning over everything about him, his ego is through the roof. he has very little worry about you leaving him for someone else. honestly, he finds it amusing most of the time when someone attempt to draw you away from him, and let’s it play out a lot for his own entertainment. of course, he’ll intervene if it’s making you uncomfortable but he also believes you can handle yourself 

when oliver gets jealous, he acts as casual as possible. he’s friendly towards the other person and but it’s not hard to uncover that it’s all fake, whether it’s from the glint in his eye or the way his smile is stiff and forced. common tells when he gets jealous is that he pokes his tongue against the inside of his cheek or he clenches his teeth and inhales softly but sharply.  he employs the good old tactic of calling the other person the wrong name and making all kind of underhanded comments that slowly chip at their nerves. (“haruya? haruki? oh! you’re haruto! right, right, you know, they’ve never mentioned you before! crazy, huh?”) 

michael kaiser ✶

kaiser in german literally means ‘emperor,’ and it’s no secret that kaiser views himself as one. similar to sae, he see himself as so above others that he’s not even bothered by other people hitting on you. it displeases him greatly, sure, but these cockroaches will never be able to steal you from him so why should an emperor deal with the plebians? the only time that ever happens is when a peasant is particularly forceful and then, kaiser intervenes

when he gets jealous, kaiser puts on a show. if there’s one thing about him, he’s a bit of a drama queen. he will absolutely posture and puff out his chest at the offending person, looking down his nose arrogantly and smirking. he makes a big display of wrapping himself around you, gripping firmly at your hips and saying, “liebling, you’re very charitable to entertain this insect, but it’s time to end this ruse.”

[cepheustarot]

What will attract your future spouse in you?

Attention! This reading is for entertainment purposes only. This tarot reading does not give a 100% guarantee that all the described situations will occur or being ultimate truth. You build your own life and destiny and only you know yourself best.

Paid readings

Pick a pile. Choose one or more pictures. Trust your intuition.

Pile 1: I can say that you are already attractive in yourself, you have a beautiful, charming appearance and your charisma attracts people! You are one of those who knows how to start a conversation, always find a topic for him and you can also maintain a dialogue, any topic, you look like an interested interlocutor and your future spouse will immediately notice this in you, he will be very pleased that you are so attentively and enthusiastically participating in a conversation with him. You are a versatile person in yourself, you may have many hobbies or fields of activity, you are one of those who are open to new things and curiously plunges into all the unknown for you. Also your future spouse will be very attracted by your emotionality, you are clearly one of those who has a lively bright speech, who has a bright facial expression, he is attracted by how you vividly react to any details. As I said, you are quite a versatile person who likes to try something new and he will also like it in you. He respects in you that you do not give up after the first failure but try again, try new approaches, methods, he appreciates your diligence and dedication, the desire to achieve your goal. He also respects your ability to adapt to any situation, in this regard you are a flexible person and you react quickly to changes, you know how to adapt to them. You also adjust the dialogue to the form of communication that is convenient for both of you, this also attracts him very much. He generally sees you as the soul of the company, an open and brave person, and he admires and attracts you very much. You can also sometimes playfully flirt and flirt, but at the same time it looks neat and unobtrusive, which warms up interest in you.

Pile 2: Your future spouse is attracted by your maturity, wisdom, and life experience, and you generally look like a knowledgeable person who has achieved a lot in his life. You are also characterized by emotional maturity, you do not worry about any little things and minor reasons, you are calm enough and can keep this calm even in stressful situations; you are not one of those who succumb to panic and emotions, you are exactly the one who is already thinking through a plan of action, how to cope with a difficult task, with a difficult situation, with problems. He respects such personality traits very much, he sees you as a really adult and responsible person! You are also one of those who does not flatter people and does not exaggerate in words, you openly and honestly say your opinion, what you think about people's actions, what you think about this or that person in general — and your future spouse really appreciates your openness, honesty, straightforwardness. At the same time your honest opinion does not offend people, on the contrary, they just respect what you tell them, respect your words, because they can see in you some kind of mentor. Your future spouse is also attracted to the fact that you are easy-going, easily take on something new, you can make decisions quickly and not regret them, in general, this is your speed and attracts him, maybe because you two have the same pace of life, the pace of action! Also he is attracted by your passion for business, you can literally burn with new ideas, your activities, and such dedication to something he admires.

Pile 3: Your future spouse is attracted by the fact that you are a fairly active person who finds it difficult to sit still, you can always figure out how to dispel boredom, what to do, you are never bored. He likes your sense of humor, your jokes really seem funny and funny to him, he feels on the same page with you, he is very comfortable with you. You may also have the feeling that you have known each other for much longer, since in a short time you could really get very close. He is also attracted to the fact that you know how to find a way out of any situation, you know how to resolve any dispute and problem, you know how to find an approach to each person and in general you are one of those who have a ready-made plan for all occasions. He really appreciates your creativity, your non-standard approach to business, perhaps you also tend to think outside the box, you may have a strongly developed lateral thinking. It's also easy for you to study any topic, you literally absorb information like a sponge and you always have something to tell. It's your frankness that attracts him, he likes that you share any thoughts with them whether it's some of your reflections on philosophical topics or funny stories from childhood, or in general a story about how your day went. You know how to present information in such a way that everyone will listen to you attentively and with interest, you can tell a very fascinating story.

Thank you for reading! I will be glad of any feedback 🖤

[nervoussagittarius]

got to have a taste of a pretty girl

matt sturniolo x singer!reader

summary: a past experience is brought up causing you to finally be comfortable telling your boyfriend your biggest secret, request

warnings: fluff, language, coming out, slight angst

“hey matt.” you said as he picked up your phone call. your current position on your couch was one of nervousness. you sat on the edge, hunched over, with your leg bouncing with anxiety.

“hey baby, what’s up?”

“so i have something to show you and was wondering if you’d be willing to come over?”

“yeah absolutely. i’ll see you in 10, love you!” he said hanging up the phone.

to rewind, you were cleaning out a few boxes this morning when you came across a cd with some of your old, unreleased, songs on it. you had a habit of recording stuff that was almost to personal to put out and hiding it away. you used this method almost as a coping mechanism. out of sight, out of mind.

curiosity came over you and you decided to see exactly what songs were in this record. a few of them were really nothing, just some stuff you had made when you were messing around with different vocals and settings. but the last song was something that you really did want to hide. you never meant to come across it again.

this song described the first intimate experience you ever had with another girl. you were about 18 at this point, close to a year before you even knew matt. you had known for a while that you liked women and men, but the only person you told was your best friend alexa.

now alexa was completely boy crazy. never once thinking she might be into girls. until one night when you guys decided to go to some random la house party a mutual friend was hosting.

after a few hours you both started feeling flirty and we’re having a lot of fun dancing with each other. this was when alexa decided to tell you that she had thought you were her favorite person she’d ever met and how if she were to ever experiment with a women it would definitely be with you.

one thing led to another and she led you into her bed. only to wake up the next morning saying it was a good time but it was a mistake that will never happen again. she could pretend all she wanted but it already happened. so you guys went your separate ways.

you weren’t devistated my any means, you almost expected things to happen this way. she went on to keep her boyfriend and you moved on with your life.

you never really felt comfortable telling anyone else about your sexuality though. it was a really scary process. you never knew how that person would react, and you were fine never being in a romantic relationship with a girl. you really did want to spend the rest of you life with matt. it was only far though that matt knew the real you.

matt knocked on your door exactly 9 minutes and 23 seconds after he hung up the phone. you were so nervous you kept count.

he let himself in like normal and made his way to your couch, leaning down to give you a kiss.

“okay, so what did you want to show me” matt asked with a dopey smile on his face.

“well,” you started. “i found something this morning and i’d like you to listen to it.”

you made your way over to the cd player and pressed play on the song, not so formally named, pretty girls.

a long 2 minutes and 26 seconds went by before the song ended.

“it was a good song, sweetheart. i love all of your music, but i’m a little confused about what it means. are you trying to tell me something? did someone do something to you? i’m not really comprehending.” matt began to ramble.

you took his hands in your, “okay i’ll explain. so basically, about a year before we started dating i was friends with this girl named alexa.” you stopped to take a deep breath but it came out shakier then expected.

“it’s okay love take your time”

you couldn’t get through the rest of the story.

“i’m not straight, matt”

you could see his eyes slightly widen but he nodded at you to continue.

“i’m bisexual, and alexa was the first girl i even did anything with. it didn’t really mean anything, to either of us, but she was the only one that knew and we were at a party. and she wanted to experiment, but she had a boyfriend. and it’s all a little blurry, but i needed to tell you because i’m really tired of hiding it.” your eyes started to fill with tears at your rant. it all was settling in on you.

“i really don’t want to lose you because i love you so fucking much, but i had to tell you how i really feel. and the song doesn’t really have anything to do about it, but it seemed like a good lead way into the topic.”

matt let go of your hands. you looked up at him in confusion and wariness. he instead grabbed your face and used the pads of his thumbs to wipe the tears that had begun to fall. he leaned his forehead against yours with tears also in his eyes.

“can i say something now?” matt asks.

you gave him a nod with a slight laugh.

“i am so proud of you.” matt said with a raspy chuckle. “i am so grateful that you felt comfortable enough to share that with me. you have not idea what it means. i see how much shit people who are homosexual go though and it’s really scary. so thank you.”

“and you could never lose me for being honest with me. if anything it makes me love you even more.”

once matt finished talking, you leaned forward to give him a passionate kiss. matt layed his back into your couch as he pulled you into his chest so he was holding you.

you went on to have a long and intense conversation on the entire event that happened between you and alexa. you also told him how and when you realized you were bisexual.

“i kinda want to put the song out.” you said as you played with the hem on his shirt.

“i think that’s a great idea, baby”

an: the end. i’m sorry it’s kinda short but full song credits go to mother renee rapp. i could’ve never written this without her. i hope y’all enjoyed🤍

[warblogs17282]

The more I think about it, the more that I think that Blitz is gonna hit a mental rock-bottom in ghostfuckers.

So, let's start off with the first clue: Millie being very consistently annoyed/angry in the scenes where we see her in ghostfuckers.

Why could this be? My theory is that it's because Millie is starting to suspect that there's something going on with Blitz, and she tries to figure out what this is exactly, but Blitz just keeps brushing her attempts to do so off, or just straight up won't tell her, leading to her slowly getting more and more frustrated at Blitz.

Another thing of note within the gif is that we see Millie shouting something, I can't read lips, but I'd wager that it's something along the lines of 'ENOUGH!', which could potentially play into what I mentioned in the last paragraph.

And it makes complete sense if Millie is the one to pick up on the fact that there's something going on with Blitz, considering she appears to be rather supportive/comforting to Blitz, with a major example of this being s2 e4, where Millie was the one to break the news to Blitz that Stolas got badly hurt. So it'd make sense to me if Millie is the one to see that Blitz is going through something, and wants to try and help him by making him feel better or something, but Blitz's tendency to push others away just ends up annoying and angering her.

Clue 2: 'Blitz is coping with what happened in apology tour in a not so healthy way.'

Assuming that this comment ends up being true, it tells us that Blitz is employing unhealthy coping mechanisms in order to cope with the events of Apology Tour, and we know that Apology Tour hit Blitz hard, just look at his face when he sees Stolas really enjoying himself with the BTB guy.

So, what method could Blitz be using to cope? A common theory during the mission shorts is that Blitz is purposely overworking himself/throwing himself into work because of the events of Apology Tour, and I personally agree with it, at the moment, it's the one that makes the most sense to me.

Another theory of what this could be was drugs/alcohol because of Blitz's past and previous relationship with them, but that theory doesn't really hold much water to me, mainly because we've only seen Blitz drink in social settings throughout the show, after the events of s1 e7 we see Blitz on the couch asleep after binge eating ice cream, and because Blitz said "oh thank Satan." when Barbie Wire said that she wasn't back on the drug named H-8.

Clue 3: Blitz's literal mental breakdown.

Blitz - "I destroy everything, I make everyone's lives worse!"

During the trailer, we see Blitz having what appears to be a literal mental breakdown, and I'd wager that this is the point where Blitz hits mental rock-bottom for two huge reasons.

1: Blitz's skull necklace that came from his mother that he normally always wears appears to be missing looking closely at this scene within the trailer.

2: A combo of all the other points I've listed in this post.

Truth be told I am not looking forward to seeing Blitz hit mental rock-bottom, but the only potential silver lining I can think of here is that it may make/force Blitz to actually be vulnerable in front of Millie and/or the others, which would allow them to actually be able to give Blitz some support, which it does look likely that Millie is trying to offer Blitz some support in that scene.

Plus, not to mention literally everything else that's gonna happen in ghostfuckers as well, like Blitz talking to his mother, and that hallucation with Millie, with "You always take from those around you, leaving them worse and more broken than you found them.", those are also 100% gonna fuck with Blitz's mental state a lot.

[honey-crypt]

can you do some headcanon drabbles thingies with a farmer that has BPD? Bachelors please

a/n: yippee i get to write about bpd!!! fun fact but i was diagnosed with it for about two years (it ended up being a misdiagnosis) and i did a ted talk (like a legit one lol) about it and the criminalization/demonization of personality and other "undesirable" disorders :3 thx for this request and enjoy!

warning: discussion of bpd splitting, mental health crisis, and self-harm

★ sdv bachelors with bpd!farmer ★

alex

★ seeing you split for the first time is the catalyst for him to address his own issues, such as dealing with his father's abuse; to an extent, he can see himself in you, longing for approval and love from others, only to fall apart when others don't provide that

★ a very good listener, he opens his ears and mind to you to talk about what's on your mind and you do the same for him; it's very helpful and therapeutic for the both of you

★ does his best to keep you away from george, he worries that his grandfather's behavior would trigger an episode in you but he couldn't keep you away from him forever; it does cause an episode but with evelyn's help, alex manages to get george on his best behavior around you

elliott

★ often writes you letters of reassurance and love for you to read whenever you're having an episode, it's his way of supporting you through your hard times

★ he attends workshops to learn methods to assist you with bpd episodes and symptoms after harvey recommended it to him when he confided in him about his concern for your wellbeing

★ adds a small piece of candy, such as a starburst or skittle, in your pill box so you have a little reward/pick-me-up when you take your medication

harvey

★ out of all the bachelors, he's the best equipped to support you during your episodes (he did a psych rotation during his residency) but he tries his best not to go doctor mode on you

★ covers your farmhouse with sticky notes that feature medication reminders, words of affirmation, and so on; you save each and every one of them in a little scrapbook that you look back on for reassurance

★ harvey makes you feel safe, you're truly able to trust him and confide in him; you both make it work and even though others are critical of your relationship, either of you really give a damn because you love one another

sam

★ he's familiar with mental health conditions because of his father's ptsd and in the beginning of your romantic relationship, he kinda isolates himself from you when you're splitting because he genuinely doesn't know how to help

★ but thankfully, he learns how to support you with harvey's education on bpd, such as grounding you with music or encouraging you to socialize with others

★ he enjoys writing and playing you songs as a means of grounding, you're his inspiration and he wants to brighten your world with the power of music

sebastian

★ he goes into research mode after you inform him that you have bpd, he knows that personality disorders are heavily stigmatized and he doesn't want you to feel like he thinks you're a bad person for having bpd

★ does dbt (dialectical behavioral therapy) homework with you when you come home from group (group therapy); it helps him just as much as it helps you, he learns a lot of coping techniques that he utilizes when he has to deal with hardships or shitty people like demetrius

★ gets you an enamel pin for every month you remain clear from self-harm, you have an ita bag that you secure every pin on and it's one of your most treasured possessions

shane

★ a match made in hell... JK JK you two have the potential to bring out the best or worst in one another, depending on your relationship and whether or not you both are in therapy

★ if you're friends, you're able to support one another through bpd or depressive episodes, you both are different sides of a very similar coin and your empathy for one another transcends the boundaries of your typical friendship

★ but if you're dating or married?? i'm sorry but it's not gonna work out well unless both of you are consistent with your meds and therapy; you often get paranoid about your relationship with shane and it only intensifies during his 14 heart event where you and marnie think he relapsed with his drinking, causing you to split... luckily, it works out in the end but you still struggle with coping and trusting shane

[siffrin-enthusiast]

hey chat i’ve been having Thoughts about siffrin again.

tws for heavy discussions of unhealthy coping mechanisms, self-harm & suicide in the game in stars and time, spoilers for the entire game act 6 twohats etc etc. if anyone reads this and thinks of any more tws i should add, send them in and i'll add them to the top of this post.

your last warning of heavy discussions VERY unhealthy coping, the urge to and methods of physical and emotional SELF-HARM, and the weight of SUICIDE. i just want to reiterate that IT IS A LOT. use your best judgement before & while reading this post and PLEASE BE CAREFUL.

last last warning. just to be sure.

siffrin self-harms in the loops. we all know this, right? from the increasingly barbaric means they use to loop back, the glass shard they pick up and use, the bigfrin fight where your only craft skill is "(don't attack.) can't hurt them. attack the only person left" and the party visibly reacts to you using it. it's not exactly subtle.

it makes sense that the pretty popular headcanon is that siffrin doesn't drop the habit of self-harming after coming out of the loops. i agree with that, but i also think that it's not done in the way most people are thinking! let me explain.

siffrin's self-harming behavior in the loops boils down to three major (and very intertwined) truths about their situation.

siffrin does not recognize the value in his life. this has been a thing since before sif joined the party. they happened to cross paths and stepped up to defeat a "particularly strong Sadness" (and for reference, fully leveled storming the house Mirabelle gets nervous about fighting a Sadness. they will freeze you in time. they ripped out siffrin's eye in one blow. they are DANGEROUS.) and siffrin comes along to save this country because "there's nothing else for you to do". and then the loops start. siffrin realizes he can die and. well. holy fuck. we've all played the game. siffrin is literally killing himself, killing himself, for convenience because it's annoying to walk to a tear. and it's his idea!! if you do it enough times, the death text changes from (You killed yourself.) to (You saved yourself some time.) loop has a line about advising siffrin against suicide because they'll see themself as "disposable" and...yeah. yeah. they do.

siffrin will not let physical or emotional harm come to the other members of their party. again, this is something seen before the loops, when siffrin loses his eye defending bonnie from a sadness, and how they still cringe over being 'inconsiderate' to mira months ago during their travels across vaugarde. when the party panics after (just attack), siffrin loops. when the party dies in loop's hangout, siffrin loops. when bonnie is taken by the king, siffrin loops. when isa is taken aback by bad touch, siffrin loops. when odile realizes they're in a time loop in kinda sus, siffrin loops. when the party watches siffrin hurt himself in the bigfrin fight, siffrin attempts to loop. good god, there's a scene where if you try and use the dagger on your family members siffrin blames his intrusive thoughts and stabs themself. because of their intrusive thoughts. his dreams are about the fear of hurting their friends. their worst, most traumatizing moments are about other people getting hurt.

siffrin's actions in the loops are reversible. if something is done, it can be undone. it can be scripted around. their party will not know unless siffrin chooses to tell them. none of their actions have consequences. sif delights in this (until realizing beating the king doesn't free him from the loop). fuck up bonnie's friendquest? loop! miss a key? loop! say the wrong thing? loop! everyone dies horribly? loop! loop! loop!

and after the loops? let's take a moment to reevaluate siffrin's situation:

siffrin does not recognize the value of his life. still.

siffrin will not let physical or emotional harm come to the other members of their party. still.

siffrin's actions are no longer reversible. there is no time loop. what happens now happens--no second chances, no undo button. they are permanent. especially now that they've seen sif try to loop, the smell of burnt sugar that precedes it, and odile figured out how to shut it down. all of their actions have consequences.

immediately after the bigfrin fight, mira asks where sif is going and bonnie LITERALLY says "Yeah, you're stupid if you think we're leaving you to do whatever you want right now." and the party double-checks that siffrin is going to see loop before letting them run off. and then twohats happens. when siffrin gets back, isa comments "We were getting worried." in siffrin's small absence (despite knowing exactly where siffrin was, talking to loop, who the party has a favorable opinion of) and then mira calls them out directly for looking sad.

the party is watching siffrin like fucking hawks.

i fully believe that siffrin would feel the urge to self-harm. i fully believe that the party knows this too. and i think siffrin would at least suspect that the party is going to be looking very, very closely for signs of more physical self-harm.

there's a phenomenon i don't have a name for but that i've seen repeated where someone trying to recover from using an unhealthy coping mechanism can slip into using a different unhealthy coping mechanism instead. in school, perfectionism can lead to avoidance. if a person shuts down for too long, they might start acting out or doing other attention-seeking behaviors as a cry for help. and after we experience continuous trauma, a lot of people will seek out or be more attached to unhealthy relationships (of any time) and find comfort & stability in the abuse endured. obviously this isn't the case every time, and i don't even know if it's a Thing i actually read about in psychology classes or just a pattern i've been noticing! i'm no professional.

for siffrin, actions and their consequences are now permanent. so i really, really don't think he's going to self-harm unless they're 100% sure they're going to get away with it (and i doubt the opportunity will arise for months). because if the party finds out they self-harm, that breaks sif's rule of not letting physical/emotional harm come to the party. they're going to be devastated. we already saw how they acted when siffrin did it in front of them when he was using the dagger to loop, the bigfrin fight. when dagger looping, siffrin was more shaken up about watching their family watch siffrin die than the literally killing himself part. they do it in front of their party and in the bigfrin fight because he thinks he can loop back. but that is no longer siffrin's reality. the party will be devastated if siffrin hurts himself and siffrin cannot undo that hurt.

("Yeah, you're stupid if you think we're leaving you to do whatever you want right now.")

i think that since physical self-harm is banned for siffrin, he's going to subconsciously shift to emotional or at least more subtle self-harm. keeping that unhealthy emotional distance. getting angry and frustrated and bitter. overly helpful. denial and minimizing and suppressing the loops. alcoholism. dissociating from their feelings. keeping their expectations so, so soul-crushingly low. passivity. whatever was left of his self-esteem is going through a woodchipper. self-sabotage his relationships. impulsive behavior. throwing themself into the party's problems to forget his own.

little things, subtle unconscious displays of siffrin's utter loathing of himself that he thinks on some level he can get away with. that their party won't notice, won't be hurt by. there won't be consequences! no one will be hurt (except siffrin, but as previously discussed, siffrin does not value themself). the party is going to be watching; their refusal to let siffrin go to dormont alone says as much. and siffrin is not going to start opening up and becoming the coping mechanisms master; their non-mention of the fight with loop (only saying "i said thanks to loop" instead of "loop is me and also tried to kill me") says as much. there's...a long road ahead, that much is clear.

i think siffrin will eventually get better. isafrin only happened because siffrin reached out for isabeau instead of waiting on isa to do it, which i'm interpreting as a very positive sign of sif learning he has to reach out for help to receive it. it's going to be messy. it's going to take a while. but the time will pass anyways. siffrin will eventually get better.

those are just my thoughts as a non-professional. i'd love to hear other people's thinking about siffrin. if you need it, here's tumblrs official mental health resources post with resources sorted by different countries. stay safe and be well, everyone :)

[svltzmans]

boxer! hope mikaelson headcanons

a/n: i've been thinking about this hc for weeks guys i'm in love!

warnings: nsfw content (18+), mention of minor violence/injury, as always not edited just a bunch of thoughts

boxing is one of hope's favorite ways to exercise, and also one of her coping methods when she gets upset or angry

most of the time, hope uses a punching bag for her workouts

(something she knows won't get tired)

she boxes until her fingers blister, and her hands are too sore to continue

when hope works out, she pushes herself as hard as she can

and she doesn't mind getting a few badass injuries in the process

hope has definitely broken a few boxing bags, not realizing her own strength

she gets so enthralled with her punches that she doesn't think about it

she'd be an hour or so into her workout session, and the bag would just fly off the chain holding it up

the first time this happened, she just stared at it for a minute and burst out laughing

hope also sometimes likes to spar, and she'll usually get another supernatural to train with her

but one day you'd ask her if she wanted to spar with you

and she's honestly shocked, because you had never shown any interest in boxing before

she'd absolutely agree to train you

but not before teasing you a little

"i'm gonna go easy on you baby, don't worry"

she'd help you wrap your hands to protect them from getting blistered

she'd be super homoerotic about it, of course

"such pretty hands, baby. gonna show me how you use 'em?"

she'd let you pick out a pair of her gloves to borrow

(but you'd end up keeping them)

hope would start by having you punch the bag so that she could "see your skills"

but she actually just wants to watch you

because she thinks it's so hot that you're doing this with her

hope knew you were strong

but she didn't know you were that strong

she's in awe of your every move, watching you (seemingly effortlessly) throw punches

eventually she can't help herself and starts shouting praise your way

"there you go baby, that's it"

"such a strong girl, you're doing amazing"

"beat the shit out of that thing, pretty girl"

hope is too focused on you to notice that the chain holding the bag to the ceiling is starting to weaken

and eventually, the bag flies off and across the room

"oh shit!" you'd yell, thinking you'd owe the salvatore school a new punching bag

"damn love, you're too strong for the bag."

hope manages to fix the bag, hooking it back onto the ceiling

"think you're ready for me?" hope says, wrapping her own hands

"bring it on."

you and hope would start sparring, dancing around each other

and it would be almost impossible for you to focus, seeing the passion and intensity in hope's eyes

hope wasn't lying when she said she would go easy

her hits are gentle enough that they're not the slightest bit painful

she'd stop to check in a lot, double checking that she's not being too rough

and you'd do the same, even though she always had the same response

"i like it rough."

while trying to dodge a hit, hope loses her footing and lands on the gym floor below her

laughing, she pretends to collapse and just stays on the ground

instinctively, you'd straddle her, hovering above her

"knockout," you'd taunt, finally leaning in to kiss her

"seeing you about to beat me up is pretty hot," hope would mutter between kisses

"there's more where that came from," you'd say, pretending to throw a punch jokingly

you'd lay down next to hope, both of you staring at the ceiling

you'd just enjoy each other's company for a while

and hope would help you take off your hand wraps and gloves

(and probably kiss your hands because duh, she's a romantic)

i need to box with hope rn and exercise with her more after iykwim lmao

[celticcrossanon]

Harry is still welcomed in Hollywood/elite circles (e.g. Kevin Costner's charity) and high profile events in New York City. But all you have to do is look at the Pat Tillman award show or read the comment section of news articles/tv stories on Harry to find the public hates Harry as much as Meghan. PR can't change public feelings about Harry, despite the press pretending Harry can be successfully rehabilitated like Camilla. Disappointing the media don't do their jobs properly without an agenda.

Hi Nonny,

I haven't seen Harry at The Met Gala, at the big birthday parties for the Hollywood elite, lunching with A-listers, and so on, so I don't really see him as being welcomed by the Hollywood elite. He may be invited to an event for charity or weasel his way into some events in NYC, but I wouldn't class that as being unilaterally 'welcomed.' Even more damningly, the old money elite - his natural circle - want nothing to do with him (he burnt that bridge long ago when he blabbed to the press about lunching with one of them). You have a different view, of course, and this is just my opinion.

Again, IMO, some of the American public dislikes Harry. From what I can tell, most of them are apathetic towards Harry and Meghan, while a smaller group wish they would just shut up and go away. In the UK, yes, both Harry and Meghan are loathed by the public, and rightly so I think after all the lies Harry and Meghan have told about their treatment in the UK. AFAIK that is not the case in America.

I don't think the UK press is pretending that Harry can be rehabbed (for once). I think they would love him to be rehabbed so they get their main leaker back into the BRF, so they are pushing that story as it is to their own benefit. They are also running pro Sussex stories because they are paid to do so, the stories give engagement and clicks (although a lot less than they used to), or both, again IMO.

The media has not done reporting without an agenda for a very long time now. It is why you can't rely on them for news and you have to read the reports, pick out the facts and then make up your mind for yourself. I see this as a trend going back for 30 plus years now in my news sources, subtly at first and then more openly, so it is nothing new. It is disappointing but for now it is the way things are, so we have to change our method of receiving the news to cope with it.

[diaryujin]

𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄

summary: you’ve gone missing, and your best friend chan has no other method of communication other than sending you voice notes.

genre: angst

includes: university au, minho is a thirdwheel/another best friend of you both, overdosing, attempted suicide, coma-ish situation, chan is a S-I-M-P, mentions of you both being drunk, mentions of weightloss and getting paler, chan is a majoring in music here, NOT proofread, lmk if i missed anything else

pairing: non idol! uni student! chan x uni student! fem! reader

a/n: i did this low effort thing bc i haven’t had the energy for anything else pls don’t let it flop i made a comeback i’m out of my blackpink era (/j blinks don’t come after me) (should I make a sequel) song lyrics: lost by (g)i-dle (english translation)

word count: 1K including song lyrics

taglist: @kflixnet

“Hey Y/N. You weren’t at university or your dorm today. Is everything okay? I know you’ve been stressing about…well, a lot, really-” sigh “yeah, so basically, I’m worried about you.” nervous laughter “Cause like, your roommate, Tzuyu told me you were in your room at night, but then you weren’t there when I came to pick you up. I hope you hear this. Take care.”

❝𝙄𝙛 𝙄 𝙝𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙢𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨❞

“Y/N, it’s been three days. Everyone’s worried, especially me. I know you’ve talked about running away before, but…well, I didn’t think you were serious.” silence ”I hope you’re coming back soon, you know. Uni feels different and more empty without you. Take care.”

❝𝙒𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙄 𝙗𝙚 𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪?❞

“A week. I’ve been a bit busy, but I haven’t forgotten you at all. Where are you? I think the police are still searching. They better be, you’re too precious to me to lose.” deep breath “Come back, Y/N. Come back. Everyone’s asking me where you are, and I don’t know and they keep reminding me that you’re gone and everything is haunting me and-” sigh “I’m rambling again. Take care.”

❝𝘿𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙚𝙢𝙗𝙚𝙧 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙄 𝙙𝙤?❞

“Two weeks. You haven’t even seen my messages, let alone these voice notes, but they’re still delivered. Please, Y/N, this isn’t funny anymore- ignore the voice crack. No, I’m not crying. Like- I do care- um- about you…but I’m not crying. I miss you the most. I don’t have a study buddy now ever since you well…disappeared. Kinda falling behind on classes, but it’s fine. I’ll catch up.” weak giggle “Take care.”

❝𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙢 𝙣𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙨 𝙥𝙖𝙨𝙨 𝙗𝙮❞

“One month. Since you’re never going to hear these voice recordings, I might as well just say gibberish or odd confessions, hm?” weak laugh “They’ve given up. Your parents, the police…everyone, really. But I haven’t. I know you’re there – somewhere. I’ve been producing more songs to cope. You know how much I love doing that, I mean- it’s why I chose music as my major. Take care.”

❝𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙡𝙚𝙛𝙩, 𝙖𝙣𝙙, 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙯𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙩❞

“Two months. You know, today I passed by a wishing well. I threw a coin, and guess what I wished for? I wished you back, Y/N. Come back, please. I’m not requesting you at this point, I’m begging. Everything’s become worse without you, or at least that’s what Minho says. He’s a bit wild, so I’m not believing him. Where are you, mm? I’ll come there, and I’ll meet you – even rescue you if necessary!” faint hmph “I miss you. I miss you loads. Take care.”

❝𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙣 𝙦𝙪𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙡 𝙖𝙩 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙩❞

“Five months. Since you don’t seem to have heard any of these, I guess I can really just say shit, huh? Well then, I love you. Like- you know- romantically.” nervous laugh “Yeah, cliche. Dumb move. Fuck, fuck, shouldn’t have done that- but it’s out and true- I guess. Ever since last year when we…ah, leave it. Take care.”

❝𝙄 𝙙𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙠 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪❞

“Eight months. I love you. I love you. I love you, Y/N. Please, I need you back. Everything’s so dark without you. You know that you’re my driving force, right? Right? I need you here desperately.” sniffle “Y/N. Y/N. Please. I don’t- I don’t know how I can do this anymore.” whimper “I can’t- can’t lose you. Take care.”

❝𝙒𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪❞

“Ten months. Everything hurts. I don’t have the motivation to wake up in the morning, Y/N. Minho says that I’ve become thinner and paler. Other people are saying watered down versions of that. It all reminds me of you. I’m so tired, I don’t know why they suddenly care. Eh, whatever.” dull groan “Shit, I’m ranting again. Ignore it. Take care.”

❝𝙒𝙚 𝙘𝙖𝙣'𝙩 𝙗𝙚 𝙩𝙤𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚❞

shaky breath “ Y/N, Y/N, please at least see my messages.” pained whimper “I can’t. I can’t. I need- need you. Badly. Fuck- I can’t bre-breathe.” rattling of pills in a bottle “I don’t want to live anymore. There’s no po-point.” quiet sob “You-You are my muse fo-for whatever I man…manage to…get out of my studio. I love you, I’ve loved you ever-ever since the day we drun-drunk made out.” sad giggle “Yeah, sounds cra-crazy, no?” swallowing sound, gulp “You’re coming back, right? Promise? You are, you are. I’m sure of it.” cursing under breath “Fuck, Minho’s here. Take care.”

❝𝙄 𝙙𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙩𝙝𝙞����𝙠 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪❞

“Can’t move on from you. I love you too much. I love you, Y/N, and I wish I had the guts to have said it to your face when you were with me. Will you miss me? Maybe you won’t. It’s been a year after all. You’ve probably forgotten about me, about what we had, and frankly speaking? I don’t blame you.” silence “You’re still alive there though, I’m sure of it. Eat well, sleep soundly, drink water, do whatever makes you happy, even if others discourage you, and even if it’s the police, and remember to love yourself as much as I do. I love you from the sun to Pluto and back, note that.” dry laugh “I’ll always have you engraved in my memory. You’ll forever be my first and last thought. Take care.”

❝𝙒𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪❞

“Hi Y/N. It’s me, Minho. I know I didn’t talk to you as much as Chan did-” annoyed sigh “I mean, he’s your bestie westie pookie wookie and all that shit, but like- I miss you too. There’s rumors about you being spotted around and you know that I don’t believe in a lot of gossip that goes throught the university grapevine – although I do love listening to it –” slight chuckle “I really want this rumor to be proven true. Make it happen, perform a miracle or something. You always disproved me in arguments, do it again.” silence “Chan, he…he’s in the hospital.” slightly muffled sob “I caught him overdosing on pills, which is what he was doing when he…when he sent you the tenth voice note. A month after that, he tried to kill himself, hence the eleventh one. That was like- three days ago. He’s still…still unconscious, but he’ll wake up soon, I hope. Come back Y/N. We all miss you, and Chan needs you. In his words, take care.”

❝𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙄 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠, 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚❞

[fantasylandloser]

Cupid

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x woc!reader

Summary: idfk Daryl + apocalypse + love

Warnings: canon typical violence, injury to reader, lots of hurt comfort, angst, nno specific plot

A/N: I just started watching twd and everybodys so attractive and traumatized, I don't know what to do with myself. Anyway enjoy, or don't.

******

When you first met Daryl, you very quickly learned to be cautious of him and his brother. The color of your skin caused unnecessary distress to the eldest brother, and he made sure everyone else was aware of this problem if he was in the mood.

You were tactful about avoiding him for the most part. Until Merle was missing. You weren’t particularly sad about it. You surely wouldn’t miss him, then you began to notice Daryl without worrying his brother was behind him. 

He was quiet, withdrawn, helpful, kind in his own way. He was many things, maybe even a good man. The first time you found yourself around him on purpose, you’d been spooked. You ran to the first person you saw, which was Daryl and he pushed you behind him. You hardly realized the way you gripped onto him when he held up his bow an arrow to shoot the walker. Your heart was beating so loudly that when he told you ‘it’s dead now’ you barely heard him. And you didn’t get to thank him before Carol pulled you away. 

The next day Daryl found ten perfectly carved wooden arrows outside his tent. He knew it was you. He never told you thank you though, he didn’t know how. 

The next time he goes through a bunch of arrows again he finds more outside his tent, probably twenty, they’re perfect, each of them. He hates them. He doesn’t understand them. Which is why you find them thrown back at your feet, when he finds you at the creek washing clothes. 

“I can carve my own arrows.” You look taken back slightly, but nod nonetheless. 

“I’m aware.” You say trying your best to appear unruffled, but you were also well aware others were watching the two of you. 

“You don’t need to be wastin’ your time makin’ these.” He nods to them. Then looks away from you when he sees your look of disappointment. 

“I understand. I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” Your reply is so soft he barely hears you, and he knows he’s a dick by how gutted you sound , but he can’t bring himself to pick the arrows back up so he just walks away. 

You stay away from him again after that. Only near him when the group is all together, never making eye contact or standing too close. 

*****

The next memorable interaction between Daryl and you is when Andrea shoots him. It was the most reckless thing you’d ever seen in your opinion, and you didn’t have a problem telling her so, much to the shock of the rest of the camp. You couldn’t help being so mad though, you’d finally found safety on the farm and you were a little upset to have it compromised. No other reason. 

Someone must have told him when he woke up because when you pass by his tent for the tenth time in an hour, he calls you in. It’s awkward considering how little the two of you have spoken. He doesn’t ask you for anything, even though you offer plenty. He just reaches into his back pocket, hands you a sharp knife with an impeccable blade, tells you that he found it while he was in the woods and figured you’d have use for it. 

He asks you to show him the technique you used when you carved his arrows. His way of apologizing you think. You tell him there wasn't a technique, but you let him watch you carve one and he realizes you’re so into it you don't recognize the method to your own madness, you’re just using it to cope, to create. 

After that  day he lets you carve his arrows, sometimes sitting with you while you do it. The two of you didn’t do much talking but you both appreciated the company. 

******

“Raise your arm more.” Daryl tells you. You huff slightly not annoyed, just frustrated. 

“It’s heavy.” You complain.

“You made it.” He counters, squatting beside you. 

“Not for me.” You murmur. He sighs and takes the crossbow from you. Something you made mostly of wood and spare parts you found around the camp. It was really badass in Daryl’s opinions but for whatever girly reason you were embarrassed. 

He had found it when he was looking for you, put away the best you could in your tent, but still it caught his eye. He wasn’t snooping, as you said he was. 

Daryl can’t help but admire it, but that’s all he does. He won’t accept it as a gift, not something you put so much work into, so he offered to teach you how to use it instead. You regretted saying yes to that as your shoulder ached.

“Just somethin’ you gotta learn how to do now.” Is all he can offer, you only sigh while stretching your arms once more before taking the crossbow back from him. 

“Hold up” You still, but you keep your arm lifted. You let him move the strands of curly hair out your face, some of them falling back to exactly where they were. 

‘Alright now you can actually see the target.” You scoff, seeing how pleased he is with himself, but can’t help the amused smile that lights up your face. 

“I hate you.” You say, with no bite behind it, but you can actually see the target now. You don’t hit it on the first ten tries, but when you finally do, you smile in triumph, pleased with yourself. You allow yourself that joy for a few seconds, you’ve forgotten Daryl at this point. Because you reload without so much as looking back at him and continue on until the sun is no longer in the sky. For a reason unknown to Daryl, this blooms a feeling of pride in his chest. 

******

Sometimes you found yourself watching Daryl's arms. It wasn’t something you did purposefully, he’d be showing something to you and your eyes would just wander. It was a stupid habit that only caused you more trouble than you needed. 

“Are you listenin’ to me?” No you were not. 

“No.” Your cheeks heat up at your admission, your eyes finally making their way back up to his. “I’m sorry.” You catch the amused glint in his eyes and you know you were caught.

“It’s alright, we'll pick back up-” Daryl’s name is called before he can finish speaking. Shane and Rick nod him over and he gives you a quick look before walking over. They leave to make a run an hour later. 

Everytime Daryl leaves you watch for him, waiting for him to get back. You wish you didn’t, but you couldn’t do anything else with him gone, too scared, too nervous. That’s how you end up in such a stupid accident. Falling off the roof of the RV had to be the most embarrassing thing you’d ever done, and stupid. You probably would have been able to just get up and dust yourself off with a few scratches and possibly some sore muscles if you hadn’t landed right on an arrow you’d carved while you waited. 

You don’t cry out surprisingly, it’s probably shock. You’re barely aware of your surroundings as Dale and Andrea come from inside and rush you towards the house. You let them push you into the room and lay you on the bed, you let Hershel look at it, but the second he mentions pulling it out you panic, defensively covering it with your hands.

Carol is on the porch waiting for them to get back and they see the panic in her face before she has the chance to say anything. And Daryl sees that you aren’t on top of the RV like you usually are when he’s gone and he starts sprinting towards the house, the others are a close second behind him. 

“No please.” You’re not crying still, but you’re panicked, blocking Hershel from getting to you.

“I just want to help you, but you gotta calm down.” Hershel tells you. You let out a series of no’s while you get out of bed. When Daryl finally makes it to the room and sees the situation, he feels a bit of relief. He’s sure you’re in pain and he hates that, but it’s better you be in pain than dead.

“How the hell did this happen?” Daryl asks, when you hear his voice, your head snaps towards him and you call for him. 

There's a series of voices answering his question, but he ignores them all when Hershel says “She’s delirious, I need you to hold her down.” 

“You gotta lay back down, sweetheart.” Daryl tells you, he walks to you slowly trying not to spook you, He’s never seen you so terrified and he knows the pain must be too much when you're malnourished and sleep deprived and he knows you give most of your rations to Lori. 

“I don’t want them to take it out.” He knows you barely know what you’re saying. But he thinks you’re calming down some as your eyes grow wet. You clutch your side as the pain finally catches up with your senses. 

“Just lay down and let me look at it.” If you weren’t so out of your mind in pain you’d realize that he was lying, but you were. You agree lying back down. Once you do he attempts to lift your shirt, but it’s stuck to the arrow that hasn’t been pulled out. 

He sighs, his arm going around the top of your chest signaling Rick to grab your legs. “Baby, you’re gonna have to let him pull it out.” He sees your panic swell again but grabs your hand before you can do anything. 

“Just breathe, okay.” When Hershel starts to go to work on your wound, you face Daryl’s chest as you quietly cry. “I know, I know.” He soothes. Daryl realizes that he doesn’t think he’s seen you cry often since all of this has started and it makes his chest ache a little. 

When everything calms down after you pass out from the pain, and Hershel stitches up your wound Daryl finds himself sitting there still with his hand in yours. He doesn’t leave your side until your eyes open.

*****

Daryl gently touches your hair while you tell him about your life before infection. Your head is in his lap and he doesn’t even remember climbing into the bed with you. He allows himself the intimacy, says to himself that it’s to comfort you and not at all for him.

He doesn’t know when he started to feel so comfortable with you, but he thinks you have a way about you that would make any man break down his walls. It scares him. He hates it. He thinks you’re cupid, shooting him with arrows, making him love you.

“Were you with anyone before all this started?”  You ask. He only shakes his head. You hum softly, your hands fidgeting with the hand of his that isn’t in your hair. After a while of silence Daryl realizes you fell back asleep, but he can’t bring himself to leave you just yet. 

You’d lost so much blood in the day prior, more blood than he thought was survivable, but Hershel said you were fine. He couldn’t shake this feeling though, he just wanted you to be fine, he didn’t want to be scared. 

When the herd came for the house Daryl felt panic constrict his throat in a new way. Chaos ensued as he looked for you. When he finally found you, you were holding your own with a group of walkers, he would have found the time to be proud if it weren’t for the way his heart was beating. 

By the time you make it to his motorcycle, you killed nearly a dozen with his help. “Hurry the hell up.” He rushes, even though you’re hurrying to the best of your ability. 

****

“Where is she?” Daryl asks as he walks through the prison, he doesn’t get an answer but he doesn’t need one as your head pops out at the sound of his voice. 

He sees the betrayal in your eyes as you look at him, still he gets closer, just wanting to be near you. He starts to say your name, maybe to apologize, you’re not sure, and you don’t care. You shove him away from you. He comes back. 

“You left.” Your voice betrays you, as it quivers. “We needed you here.” 

“He’s my brother.” He tries to explain,

“And what are we?” Your voice rises, and it’s the first time you’ve ever yelled at him. It startles him slightly. “Are we not family?” You ask. “What am I?” Daryl clearly doesn’t have an answer for you. 

“Baby-” He calls when you turn away, ignoring Merle’s presence as you did before. “Give her space.” Carol tells him. “She’ll come around.”

“What the hell did I miss, little brother?” Merle asks, only to be ignored.

When you finally come back from wherever you run off to, you don’t make a sound if Daryl or Merle speak to you. It’s like how it was before Merle left the first cam, except worse in so many ways. 

Daryl just wants you to understand, he doesn’t know how you don’t. He wants to tell you it wasn’t personal, but the words don’t seem right. He works to find the right ones but it’s no matter, they’re aren’t any. 

You’re holding baby ass kicker when he finally gets a moment with you. Everything that happens is usually so public to the group now that you have to stick together, so he knows that everyone knows what you mean to him. It’s unnerving.

“M’sorry.” You pause your actions momentarily before going back to tending to the baby. When you don’t so much as acknowledge him, he goes where you and ass kicker are before getting on his knees willing you to look at him. 

“You gotta talk to me, alright? Even if you just want to yell or scream or hit me, give me somethin’” He pleads, he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. You exhale a shaky breath. “I’m sorry I pushed you earlier. Wasn’t right.” Daryl almost scoffs because of course you’re apologizing.

“Deserved it.” He whispers to you, still on his knees in front of you, waiting for your eyes to land on him. You shake your head in disagreement. 

“If you leave again, or something happens…” You pause and Daryl wants to tell you nothing will happen and he won’t leave you but he can’t promise that to be true. “I want you to know that I love you,” You whisper. “It’s all I could think about since you left. How I should have told you- how I might never see you again.” When you finally look at him you see his tears, you know he’s hurting. 

“I’m not trying to make this harder for you, I just wanted you to know.” He nods, holding his face in your lap, trying to gather his emotions. With the hand that’s not holding the baby you stroke his hair gently, allowing him to cry.

[staybabblingbaby]

Felix Tinder AU (First Date Part) A2 D3

[Caution: These are not full fics, or even full parts of fics for some, these are part of my writing progress archive!]

Concept: You match with what you think is a Stray Kids fan account on Tinder. You get along great with the account's owner, and think it's probably your most successful match to-date. Little do you know who's actually behind the screen...

Word Count: 1,580

Notes: So this will probably be the actual beginning. Maybe. Some version of it, anyways. idk, the formatting for this one is a bit... And I still have to figure out how to make fake Tinder stuff without photoshop. I do not own adobe products. This may actually end up being the first writing part in a hybrid SMAU, so it might not be the first part at all. We'll see. I didn't read this one back for any editing notes bc This entire fic is fighting me rn and I don't wanna look at it lol

Warnings: None as far as I'm aware

Leave me comments or questions or anything! Love hearing from folks <3

Masterlist | Next Part (Coming soon!)

You nervously tap on your steering wheel, anxious gaze glued to the side door you were parallel parked directly in front of. You felt sketchy as hell, but this was the manager-approved pick-up method apparently. Or at least leader-approved. You weren’t really clear on the details.

You were still sort of processing that this was your life, actually. Details were a bit secondary to the big picture here, you thought.

At last, the door creaks open and the blond head you’d been waiting for pops out. After a brief cautious sweep of his gaze, his eyes lock on your car. You roll the window down to offer him an awkward smile and a little wave.

Then, with a bright smile that made your heart do stupid little summersaults, Yongbok Felix Lee is sliding into your beat-up little jeep. You’re shamefully distracted by his (very) pretty face for a solid 10 seconds before you roll up the window and start moving to a proper parking spot.

You may be dazed by his presence, but by all things good in this world you were not carting off a (sort-of) stranger without talking to them first.

“Hi!” He’s the first to break the momentary silence, sunny grin on full, blinding, blast in your passenger seat. Your brain stalls a second time as your (again) realize that Stray Kids’ Felix is in your car. Like right now. Currently.

“Wazzup?” You greet back with a cheeky little smirk. You feel a bit bad for Felix. Making light of things was your one and only coping mechanism. You hoped he hadn’t been expecting a serious candle-lit dinner from you.

Well. Candles, maybe. Depends on how late the two of you ended up staying out.

Luckily Felix seems delighted by your overly-casual demeanor, bumping your arm with gentle playfulness. It almost feels like you’re two close friends meeting up after a long time instead of (sort-of) near-strangers.

You know that if he spends enough time with you the shell of confidence you’re currently wearing will become transparent, but hopefully the façade would carry you through tonight.

“We’re just moving so we can talk without being in the way before we head out.” You explain, pulling into a shaded parking spot in the corner of the lot. You’ve pulled hopefully far enough away to not attract attention from the doors, but also not far enough to be creepy.

Felix nods, tilting his head curiously at you. “Sure, what are we talking about?”

You put the car in park and laugh a bit at his cuteness. “Just expectations and whatnot,” You say, unbuckling so you can turn and face him properly.

“Before all that, though, are you a hugger?” You hold your arms open a bit, not enough to actually touch him, and making sure you’re not leaning forward, letting him take the reigns of contact.

You worry you may be being a bit too forward, but you were trying for normality with all of this, and you really did open most interactions with hugs when you could. You were touchy like that.

Fears once again unfounded, Felix grins widely and quickly reels you in for as tight a hug as the two of you can manage whilst still seated. He reels you in so quickly, if fact, that your arms become trapped between the two of you and you struggle for a moment to wiggle them free and wrap them firmly around his waist.

As you settle in, you rock the two of you to-and-fro, and Felix lets out a content little sigh that has you melting into the embrace.

You sort of feel like giggling madly and tearing up at the same time. You feel a bit like you need to vomit, as well, but you hold all three urges back. It’s just that Felix holds you so warmly and delicately, you feel a bit like you might shatter before the night even begins.

You reluctantly pull back before you cross the bounds of appropriateness for a first meeting, skootching around so you can bring your legs up into your seat in a weird pretzel and start the conversation properly.

You want to coo at Felix as he imitates you and gets himself comfy as well. You’re down bad for this man already, unfortunately. IT’s best that you don’t let on quite how badly if you can help it. You don’t know if you can.

“So!” You start with a clap, “First of all, allow me to welcome you to our humble city.” You do an awkward showman’s bow, gesturing as grandly as you’re able when you’ve crumpled yourself into the world’s cringiest ball.

You’re so damn lucky that Felix seems so charmed by you so far. You’re begging with everything you can that your innate silliness will guide you through tis interaction without you panicking too hard.

“I’ve been here for several days now, first of all,” Felix starts, eyes twinkling with amusement and mischief. You play right into his hands, squawking with offense and playfully swatting at him.

You both dissolve into giggles as he tries to catch your hands to keep them from hitting him, and you loudly begin to complain, “Oh well, I’m sorry someone was too busy playing two fabulous shows to come see little ol’ me before now!”

“Oh, come on now, you wouldn’t let me get you seats, you deserve this ribbing!” He retorts back, finally catching your hands and putting a stop to your flailing. He pauses then, and you can practically see the gears in his head turning.

“Wait.” He tugs you forward by your hands, staring you down with an expression of delighted disbelief. “Fabulous show? Were you there?”

You quickly turn your head to hide the mirthful smirk on your face, replying only with a drawn out “Maaaaaybe.”

Felix gasps loudly, letting go of your hands only to lightly slap your knee, “Why didn’t you tell me? I could have gotten you backstage or something!”

You wave your hands in front of you, both warding off Felix’s playful attacks nd waiving off his words.

“No, no!” You deny him, continuing on to confess, “I actually had the tickets before we even started talking, I got them right as they went on sale.” You pause and duck you head a bit to hide your blush, “Besides, our first real meeting should be our first date, right? That’s how this works.”

To your slight mortification, you can very easily tell that Felix is trying his hardest not to coo at you, so you quickly rush to move on before he can interrogate you further.

“But we’re getting off track!” You exclaim, pointing at him in gentle threat. He holds up his hands in surrender, but you can tell by the smirk on his face that he wouldn’t let it go that easily. Still, he lets you move the conversation forward for now.

“So, I’m a bit paranoid,” You suddenly confess. Felix’s brow creases with concern, but you continue before he can get any weird ideas into his head, “I just wanna make sure we’re on the same page before we actually go anywhere.”

Felix makes a noise of understanding and gestures for you to continue.

“So I just want to make sure we’re both expecting this to be a romantic date and not, like, a platonic one.” You explain. Felix tilts his head a bit in confusion but nods along.

“Yeah, we’re on the same page there.” He agrees. His gentle smile feels a bit like he’s humoring you, but you plough on regardless.

“And I know we’ve already talked about this, but I don’t put out on first dates. I’m not into hookups, so even if you’re leaving tomorrow I’m expecting this to be the first of many or the first and last date.”

Felix seems to be cottoning onto the intended severity of the conversation, despite its relatively light tone. He nods along, seeming pleased about something. You pause to let him interject, but he just gestures you to continue.

You hesitate a moment, but then finish with, “That’s all, really, I just want both of us to be happy with things at the end of tonight.”

Felix smiles so fondly at you that you think you’ll combust, so you quickly reach across him to open your glove box to pull out a couple of papers, to Felix’s utter bafflement.

“Moving on!” You exclaim, pretending that your ears aren’t burning with the force of your blush, “I also have these!”

You present to Felix a paper with an address and your vehicle details as well as a map with a certain area circled.

“Ok, so, keeping as much a secret as I can,” You begin to babble as Felix examines the papers with confusion painted over his delicate features.

“But I was thinking about what we could do that didn’t involve being in public much and wasn’t expensive or anything, and I came up with a plan. A friend of mine owns some forested land with some nice hiking trails, so I thought we’d start there, but it’s a bit rural and I know it’s weird, so I brought both the lot address and coordinates and my car details so you can tell your people exactly where you’ll be and if phone service dies or anything no one freaks out and-”

You cut yourself off, realizing that you’d probably said way more than you needed to

[wizardpink]

Hi! I read your post-finale DM meta and I think it's very interesting. The point about Armand turning Daniel because Daniel eviscerated him and made him feel seen for who he truly is (in all his flawed, monstrous glory) felt very true to his character. So I get why Armand would fall for Daniel (eventually) and turn him. But I was wondering (and this is presuming that nothing like the chase or a relationship between them happened in the past), how do you see this Daniel, this vampire who seems to have his shit together and be pretty content with his vampiric life (afawk from the finale, tho this obviously may not be the full truth), falling for Armand eventually? How do you think that will develop?

@destielonfire First of all let me apologize for having no idea when you sent this, I never saw a notification so I hope it hasn't been too long!

I think Daniel's hot girl summer moment we saw a glimpse of in the finale is a ruse by the writers. It added an air of levity to the season finale and gave viewers (and eric!) the gift of swaggering badass vampire Daniel.

But season 3 will have the time to get into it more deeply and well, I don't think anyone ever has a great time after being turned, even if you are rich and famous.

I'm not sure Daniel has ever had his shit together a moment in his life. He says he did when he convinced Alice to marry him, but it must not have lasted long. He was never able to balance his work life with his family. I doubt he'll have an easier time balancing his work life with being a vampire.

I'm also leaning towards the reads on him that this is going to pull him right back down into his addiction issues, now that he's immortal. There are no (well fewer) consequences for substance abuse as a vampire, plus he has a whole new drug, blood, and all that comes with acquiring it. In Dubai we saw that Daniel was squeamish about eating wriggling fish. How is he coping with killing and eating people? I think we only saw one half of the story in the finale. We saw the alcoholic at the bar, buying shots for all his friends while everyone laughs and cheers. We didn't see the next morning's hangover.

In the books, Armand effectively drives Daniel insane to the point the point he falls in love with him, which is hella fucked up (and we love that), so I can see the show taking one of two paths here.

The first is they just adapt that method straight from the books. Lonely and desperate Armand chasing Daniel around the world trying to figure out how to navigate their future as master and fledgling (and understand what drove him to break his vow to never make another vampire for THIS GUY), eventually coming to the conclusion its because he loves him, and Daniel later doing the same. Because they're both trainwrecks impossibly drawn to forms of self harm.

The second is a little less inexplicable and a lot less toxic. Instead of Armand driving Daniel crazy with his psychosexual torture, Daniel does it to himself with his hedonistic desires and lack of self-control. He feeds and kills and feeds and kills, pushes away his family, friends, and collegues, ruins his professional reputation. And he can't understand why he can't stop, why nothing ever makes him feel complete, etc etc. And because he is his maker, because of their invisible cord, Armand takes responsibility for picking him up off the floor and attempting to help him deal with this. Because Armand's the one that gave immortality to a man who can't stop blowing up his life and the lives of everyone around him.

I also think that on a more specific note, Daniel in season 3 will continue to be the plot device that presents the backstory to the audience. I think he'll probably go on tour with Lestat to try to get that second book, and Lestat will share his story, which we know features not only Armand, but Armand's maker Marius, and other places and characters that inform the audience (and Daniel) on Armand's history, motivations, traumas, etc. Daniel has been learning about Armand as a side character and villain in all these other vampires' stories where obviously they're the main characters, the heroes, the victims. But slowly piece by piece he is putting together the Armand puzzle, and now that they're inextricabIy linked he has even more motivation to put the pieces in place. I think those glimpses into Armand's history are going to intrigue him, maybe even endear him to Armand. When they're reunited he wont be able to resist going straight to the source. Which is good because Daniel finding him fascinating is going to melt Armand.

Also I am a romantic. Sometimes there doesn't need to be a reason why two people fall for each other. Season 2 already showed us that these two have an energy. There are strong feelings there already, they can't keep their eyes off each other, can't stop sniping at each other like hissing cats sniffing each other out. Combine that with vampire loneliness and mutual freakitude and you've got a recipe for something.

[beachbabey]

joel with an age regressor reader, like especially after the outbreak a good thirty years down the line. he’s experienced a lot of new shit since and nothing really phases him anymore and he knows its just a coping method you use to get through every thing you went through and he’s soft, kind and patient 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

picks up toys and magazines he sees when he’s out on patrols and fixes them up for you!!!!!

SEBBY MY LOVEEEE

Honestly?? Joel sort of envies you for having the ability to revert back to a child’s state of mind, he’s seen the absolute worst of humanity before and during the outbreak and your need to be soft and innocent for a little bit is a balm to him. He doesn’t fully understand it but he’d never let that stop him from helping you feel safe and sheltered. I can’t remember where I saw it but there’s that line that someone used to describe Joel; he was ripped from his fatherhood and you regressing is such a healing experience for him, albeit a little bittersweet at times.

It’s been so long since he’s had a chance to be in the care of someone without a giant looming threat over his head and I think he’s forgotten how to be a dad, and so he doesn’t really know how to play with you as such, he just watches and comments on what you’re doing, gently urging you to tell him about what game you’re playing. But he loves teaching you things, he loves telling you all about wildlife and teaching you how to tell the difference between berries, he teaches you all about animals and birds, and how to mimic their calls.

His favourite thing to bring back to you is all the pretty wildflowers he finds near the side of the roads, growing up old buildings and even peeking through the concrete, your room is covered in dried and pressed flowers that he helped you hang up on the walls and doorways

“Look honey, I got you a new one, this one’s called a fireweed, I’m not sure why it’s called that but isn’t it pretty??” His voice soft and even, knowing how sensitive and easily startled you are in this headspace

“Oh thank you papa!! it’s so pretty I love them! looks like a sunset!” You gasp, dropping your wooden cup and shuffling on your knees to reach up with both hands to hold the flowers as delicately as you could, subconsciously aware of how stiff his knees get, especially after doing a supply run and wanting to meet him in the middle

“Think m’gonna hang it near the window when it dries out papa”

[downsteepy]

i can't stand it anymore i have to let myself speak abt how much the physical difference between 2r leon and 4r leon (and other leons) hurts me . i have to

this is extremely incoherent rambling but i hope it makes some sense, i'll also probably talk a bit abt his character in general

leon's eyes in 2r are so bright and full of life despite everything. he's still optimistic. he looks healthy, he doesn't look tired, his hair's rather neat and tidy.

and then six years pass after raccoon city, and leon's just exhausted. he looks exhausted. he has bags under his eyes, his eyes seem noticeably duller. they're especially dull in og re4, they look more greyish blue than his usual blue.. but leon's put on all this muscle in 4r especially because he had to essentially, his hair's messier. he's still not quite a mess but he's like. almost slowly getting there.

but seeing pictures of 2r and 4r leon next to each other kills me so much just bc of the fact that 4r leon is just.. so tired looking. he's been through so much shit in 6 years, and then he has to deal with all the shit that happens during 4r.

i do want to cherry pick when he gets injected with the plagas and also when he gets stung by the mosquito thing in death island because oh my god!!! it hurts me so bad!!!!

in death island, as soon as leon feels that sting, he almost immediately panics.

i mentioned it in the tags of my recent leon art but di leon is genuinely more playful seeming, his eyes are brighter, he's put on muscle again. he's healthy.

but as soon as that sting happens, its like hes 27 again. the sting happens on the same side of his neck as the plagas injection, and he's 27 again. he's that exhausted, not quite as bright eyed and bushy tailed 27 year old again.

i kind of got sidetracked considering this is supposed to be about the evolution of his physical appearance but when i think abt 4r leon i can't help but make the death island connection so consider it a bonus.

i'll get back on track but still on the topic of death island but now i'll compare di leon and vendetta leon and probably just talk abt vendetta leon for a bit.

vendetta leon is probably honestly the most exhausted leon's ever looked. while he's still a little silly, it doesn't feel quite as playful, if that makes sense? i feel like genuinely everyone can agree though when i say this is probably like. the peak of leon's depression. he's day drinking on his vacation, so his primary coping method seems to be alcohol. his eyes and the area surrounding his eyes looks darker, he's gotten leaner, he's a bit snippier, and he doesn't want to do this anymore. he's tired. he doesn't want to have to keep doing this anymore.

there is such a stark contrast between leon's appearance + attitude between vendetta and death island and while it makes me happy because he evidently has found some way to heal or a better way to cope, it also just makes me so viscerally sad. vendetta leon makes me so sad just bc of how he appears + how he acts at the end. the difference between him and di leon is night and day.

very quick warning for mentions of suicidal ideation in the next part, i'll try to keep it brief.

re6 leon is also just. extremely deeply sad to me. he also looks incredibly tired, and while he makes a lot of quips, he's not as playful as he usually is. there is a file from re6 where leon speaks about how he's thought numerous times about ending it, but only stayed because of claire and sherry. it's genuinely heart breaking, and not to kind of derail again, but it's kind of sad to me that he only found his anchor in staying alive bc of claire and sherry, and not necessarily for himself. leon very much focuses on others before he focuses on himself, and god that shit hurts!

i've kind of equated 6leon to being a sad wet cat bc of how wet his eyes look and honestly he just. is a sad wet cat. he's just sad. he's dealt with so much trauma that just keeps stacking up, he's gotten so visibly tired, and he just doesn't get to rest. i know it's somewhat of a joke that he wants a vacation or whatever, but like.

he really just deserves that vacation. he deserves time to relax. he deserves to be able to just not worry about things and other people as much for once. he deserves a nice breakfast, and he deserves to get better.

di leon does seem to have gotten better; much brighter and livelier. and that makes me happy. i wish he'd been able to be like this earlier, but i'm happy he's finally gotten there.

i'm happy that he's happy.

[my-castles-crumbling]

hey cas

i've just been feeing really down lately. one of my biggest issues is comparing myself to others and i know i shouldn't, but it's like once my brain gets going i can't ever turn it off.

i feel like i'll never be good enough for anything. And not really in a "i don't deserve it way" but more of a "mediocre" way. i've done so many things, picked up so many hobbies and things (thanks adhd) but even ones that i stick with for years and years, i only ever get half decent at.

i just feel like i embody the saying "jack of all trades, master of none" cause there are just so many that i can do and im good at and i love but, its like i can never get better after i hit right below the average line.

and back to the whole comparing myself to others bit, i try so hard on my content, but the ones i try the hardest at get the least amount of interaction and i hate it. i'm sure part of its just a tiktok thing, but it just makes me feel like shit and i'm constantly comparing myself to a specific content creator (which i know i shouldn't do and i try so hard not to) but the fact that we're mutuals makes me feel like maybe i need to prove myself somehow?? idk, i feel like he followed me out of some sort of obligation because we ended up posting similar video ideas literally within an hour of eachother and i feel like that (mixed with some other things i don't wanna say cause i don't wanna make it TOO obvious who it is) made him feel obligated somehow to follow me back. and idk.

he also can pull of any style or whatever he wants at any point and i'm SO jealous of that because i can't do that and i wish with everything in me that i could.

i'm just lowkey feeling like shit because i know ill never be able to get to that level and i feel like im never going to get anywhere and i just feel stuck.

anyway, thanks for listening and if u have any advice or like "coping methods" that would help, i'd appreciate it <3

Hi! I think it's really important to remember that modern content creation isn't just based on skill. It's based on like...knowledge of how to manipulate social media, and also a lot of luck.

I obviously don't know a lot about tiktok, but I'll use tumblr as an example. I write like...2-4 microfics a day. And sometimes, one of the ones I write I am so proud of. Like so excited about. And I know it's decent. But it doesn't really go anywhere. And then in the same day, I'll pull another one out of my ass and hate it and think it's shit, and it ends up getting like 2000 notes before the week is out.

It's not all based on quality or skill. It's luck. Because if another Marauders fan happens to have a fic some up on their page and reblogs, then it gets spread. and that's based on all things that don't have to do with my skill as a writer: timing, the tumblr algorithm, the other person's availability, their willingness to click a button.

Most social media is the same. So please don't take it personally. It's NOT a comment on your skill or your worth.