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tayswizzlez · 8 days ago

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roman reigns x oc - love me like i'm not made of stone, chapter one: control

title: love me like i'm not made of stone (ao3) pairing: roman reigns x oc (maria marie) summary: maria marie was once called the future of wwe but now she's been sidelined playing valet to her boyfriend, ace spade. when ace's obsession with roman reigns leads to him doing something drastic both maria and roman's worlds may never be the same. rating: 18+, minors DNI warnings: language, violence, eventual smut (including light kink and bdsm), possible other warnings to be added. other things: slow burn, angst, eventual happily ever after chapter: 1/? - control word count: 6287

other stuff: disclaimer | masterlist (coming soon) | playlist | about me

notes: i've had the idea for this fic since i played wwe 2k22 because apparently i'm incapable of making caws without giving them extensive backstories. idk how this one really happened, i just kept pairing up maria and roman for tag matches and… there they were. then i stopped playing and took a break from watching wrestling but when i got 2k25 (my first game since) i had to make maria again and well… this is a result of that?

this is also my first time writing for anything wwe related so hopefully everything is ic. also this fic is 100% kayfabe (it's still real to me dammit!). i've done my best to be as canon compliant as possible but i've had to change some things to better suit this story. this takes place after roman defeats lesner (bc i really just don't want to include him at all lol) and at the height of the bloodline's power. i've changed around some of the rosters just to work better plotwise and because i'm biased and and want to write about the wrestlers i like and slander those i don't jk.

also i'll expand on this at some point but maria is half maori (a tribute to a friend). she is also in her early 30s. images of her were created by me in 2k games.

i honestly don't even know if i really like this chapter because my brain keeps wanting to focus on the later plot so i really just pushed this out so i could get to it but i hope it's somewhat enjoyable??

if you'd like to be added to an update tag list let me know!

i'm bigger than my body i'm colder than this home i'm meaner than my demons i'm bigger than these bones - control, halsey

Once they chanted her name.

Now she was lucky if it ended up on a WhatCulture “Top Ten Wrestlers WWE fumbled” list. Maria Marie one of the longest reigning NXT Women’s Champions reduced to being valet for the mid-card talent that was Ace Spade. Her boyfriend. Ace had promised her it would only be for a few months, just until he could find his footing on the main roster when they both got called up at the same time.

That had been over a year ago.

She kept telling herself things would change, that all Ace needed was one good match. A match that would put him over, a match that would help him find his footing and he would finally have his place on the roster. But deep down Maria knew that this wasn’t going to happen. During their time in NXT Maria had always been the better wrestler. She was better on the mic. She was a natural. She had lived and breathed wrestling for as long as she could remember. As a child she would stay up late to record every show on VHS and she would watch them over and over until the tape was so worn it wouldn’t work anymore. She’d memorize every move, she’d look for any tells of what a wrestler’s next move might be. She had lied about her age so she could join a wrestling club and once they had found out she was younger they ended up letting her stay because they had seen her potential. She was an expert tactician who wasn’t afraid to do high flying moves and take risks. What she had lacked in physical strength she made up for by being calm, collected and calculating in the ring.

And Ace… was Ace. He had never had a title in NXT. He was more of a loudmouth than he was a wrestler, which had only gotten worse when they had both signed to Smackdown. And it didn’t help that he was often an annoying loudmouth. He would talk a big game but never really could back it up. He always walked the line of being the type of guy the fans loved to hate or hated to hate. He was usually thrown into matches with guys at the top of the power rankings, probably to pad those wins out for them. The few matches he had won he had never won clean. But that never stopped him from talking like he was one of the biggest names in the industry.

For the most part Maria would go along with it. Because she loved him or she had at some point. In the last few months in particular Ace had been single minded in his obsession with Roman Reigns. Even at home, on the days they were away from the ring, Roman and The Bloodline was one of the only things Ace talked about. It was like he wasn’t capable of thinking about anything else anymore. Maria had learned to tune him out. She’d nod, give a “mmhmm” or some other sort of ambiguous noise that could be seen as agreement or disapproval. Ace was far to focused on himself to really even notice if Maria was listening or not.

Now was one of those times. It was just before Smackdown went live. Maria and Ace were in one of the locker rooms. Ace had been pacing back and forth, cocky as ever going on about how The Bloodline really weren’t all that great. Maria was styling her hair in the mirror. She looked immaculate. She always did. She put her hair up in an intricate style with braids woven in. Her makeup was perfect - red lips, cats eye liner and just a hint of glitter on her skin. Her clothes were perfectly tailored, skin tight pants, a sleeveless top that showed off her toned arms. She looked good. Really good.

Her eyes shift to Ace’s reflection in the mirror, he’s still ranting. Bleached blonde hair, pushed back with an 80s style bandana, like he was a Motley Crue reject. His gear a mix of garish colours and patterns that somehow for him just made sense. His long entrance jacket thrown haphazardly over the bench. He had a match against Butch tonight and Maria would be there ringside, cheering him on as usual.

“Babe, have you been listening to me?” Ace says suddenly, looking up and meeting Maria’s eyes in the mirror.

“Yeah, of course,” Maria turns to face him, leaning back against the sink.

“I need you with me on this. I can’t do this without you,” he says.

“You know I’m with you,” Maria says. How can he even question her on that, after all the sacrifices she’s made for him. It makes her chest ache whenever he talks like this. It was like no matter what she did, it would never be enough.

“It doesn’t feel like it sometimes,” Ace huffs, almost like a child. “I just need you behind me on this. No one has been able to stand up to Roman so far and I just can’t help but think the guy who can actually do it is me.”

Maria doesn’t reply right away. It seemed almost laughable for Ace to think that he could actually compare to Roman and be the one to make his empire fall. Roman was the best in WWE for a reason, he had an entire Bloodline behind him. He had beaten the best of the best, there was no one left to challenge his power. How could Ace possibly think he could do anything that?

“Babe!” Ace snaps, looking annoyed. “Just think of it. Who better to take on Roman Reigns than me?!”

“Uh, yeah,” Maria forces a smile.

“No one has the brains or charisma that I have,” Ace starts pacing, seemingly oblivious to Maria’s fake smile. “And I’m tired of having to just bow down to whatever they want. Who the hell does he think he is? He’s not special.”

Maria honestly didn’t really have many thoughts about Roman and The Bloodline. She admired him as a wrestler, there were many of his matches she watched over and over. Looking at his moves, looking at how calculated he was. How would act completely cold but there were sparks of real emotion there. Emotions he clearly didn’t want anyone else to see. She didn’t think much of that though - the emotional state of the Tribal Chief wasn’t really her concern.

She had enough trouble acknowledging her own.

A member of the backstage crew sticks her head in the locker room. “Ten minute warning,” she says, before slipping away.

“Ahhh,” Ace grins and rubs his hands together. “Who am I fighting tonight?”

“Butch,” Maria replies.

“Which one was he again?” Ace asks as he swings on his long coat with a flourish. “Doesn’t matter. My name is the only one worth remembering.”

It was impressive how someone with such a bad match record could have such a gigantic ego.

“Shall we,” Ace’s grin morphs into something that for a moment is a little bit softer. It was the smile that had first got Maria’s attention when they were in NXT. It used to give her butterflies now she didn’t feel much of anything about it. He extends his arm to her.

Maria takes it and they start to leave the locker room until Ace gives her a once over. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”

“Hmm,” Maria’s brow furrows. “What?”

Ace frowns and gestures at her arm. “Seriously? No wonder I lose matches, you can’t even remember my lucky charm.”

It takes Maria a second to realize she’s not wearing her armband. It had been something she had done when they had first started dating in NXT. It was supposed to be a one time thing for the NXT Heatwave PLE but Ace had liked it so much Maria had kept it up. She’d take scraps of fabric from his gear and fashion them into arm bands to wear for herself. Even when Ace wasn’t there or it didn’t go with what she was wearing she’d have one on. At one point she had made one from her own gear for him but he said that arm bands made it hard for him to flex and do certain moves. She had just brushed it off. Like she did a lot of things with him.

“Oh, shit,” she sighs. “I must have dropped it, you go ahead. I’ll meet you in gorilla.”

Ace scowls. “Be quick. I need my girl with me during my entrance.”

Despite the scowl he gives Maria a quick peck on the cheek before he leaves the locker room. As soon as he’s gone Maria exhales. For a few moments she just lets herself enjoy the quiet, even though she can still hear the bustle of the show outside. She missed that. She missed being a part of that. She had lived to go out there and do matches in NXT. She looked forward to touring and doing house shows more than she did holidays. And she missed it. So much.

But she told herself being there for Ace was the right thing. He had been the one who had helped her through her concussion recovery a few years ago. He had doted on her, looked after her, got her everything she needed. She could still see the look on his face for her first match back - he had been so scared. He kept asking her if she was really ready, telling her how concerned he was it was too soon.

Sometimes a deep and dark ugly part of herself couldn’t help but think Ace was only so concerned because her coming back from injury meant the spotlight would be on her again. But she couldn’t allow herself to think like that. It was too much. Besides what sort of boyfriend wouldn’t have been worried. He was the one who needed her now and she needed to be there for him.

“Five minutes!” she hears a stage hand yell out in the hall.

Maria breaks away from her thoughts, cursing under her breath as she goes back to her bag. She knows she didn’t drop the arm band, she had forgotten it. Normally it was second nature to put it on, one of the first things she did to get ready but now it was more of a chore. She pulls it out of her bag and quickly puts it on. She gives herself one last look in the mirror, forces a smile at her reflection before she leaves for gorilla. *****

That night’s Smackdown show hadn’t been that interesting - as usual. Roman Reigns had watched it from The Bloodline locker room, with Paul Heyman over his shoulder. It felt pointless sometimes but he needed to keep an eye on things. He needed to keep an eye on his show. As usual nothing of note happened. There was that one guy with the bad dye job running his mouth again but Roman didn’t take him seriously. There was no reason too. He didn’t have the skill. He wasn’t even skilled enough to lace Roman’s boots.

It was late by the time he and Heyman were finally leaving the arena. Even after the show there were things to take care of. The halls were dark, most of the other wrestlers had left and it was only crew taking things down for the night.

Roman walked ahead, while Heyman was behind on the phone talking to someone in the WWE offices.

“What my Tribal Chief wants, my Tribal Chief gets,” Heyman says into the phone. “Why is that so difficult to understand?”

Roman rolls his eyes a little as he keeps walking. From down the hall he can hear the sounds of someone in the gym. The crew always set up makeshift gyms at each arena. A place for wrestlers to warm up before matches. This surprises him, normally he was the last one to eave after each show. Curiosity got the better of him and he turns towards the gym - Heyman follows without question still on the phone.

He need to know who was still here, he had to know everything that happened on his show.

The lights of the gym were low, there was even a few crew taking down some of the equipment. In the makeshift ring was one person, the sleek ponytail making her unmistakable.

Maria Marie, the girlfriend or valet or whatever she was of that annoying jobber who had been so obsessed with him. She moved around the ring with ease, her movements so fluid and natural it was almost hypnotizing to watch. It almost made Roman want to charge into that ring and demand to know why she had just been following her useless boyfriend for so long. It was obvious just from watching her like this she had more talent in a finger than he had in his entire body.

Roman understands then why her boyfriend had pushed her into that role. If Maria was on the main roster she would outshine him. It was already impossible to take him seriously but if she was on the card he wouldn’t even be an afterthought, he’d barely even be a footnote. And he can’t help but stare at her as she continues, completely unaware of his presence.

“Ah, Maria Marie,” Heyman’s voice comes from over Roman’s shoulder, he still had his phone pressed to his ear. “One of the longest reining NXT Women’s Champions, once said to be one of the best technical wrestlers of this generation.”

Roman doesn’t say anything. He just keeps watching.

“Now she’s a valet to Ace Spade,” Heyman continues. “A shame she lost her fight, my Tribal Chief. She could have been one of the best- no, I will not go on hold again I am the Wiseman of the Tribal Chief…”

Heyman’s voice gets more annoyed as he goes back to talking to whoever on the phone, he walks away from the gym. Roman stays watching Maria, his brow furrowed.

“She hasn’t lost anything,” he mutters under his breath before he too, turns and walks away. *****

ONE WEEK LATER…

Maria was heading to catering. Ace had been ranting more than usual today and she needed a break. She told him she needed a tea to make sure her voice was ready to cheer him on ring side, which was good enough excuse for him. She was just outside of catering when she pauses, hesitating, she can hear Charlotte Flair and Lacey Evans talking and laughing.

“Did you see Spade’s latest Instagram post?” Lacey laughs. “Who does he think he is? Thinkin’ he can actually step up with the Tribal Chief.”

Maria freezes, then stays behind the vending machine. The two women don’t see her.

“I don’t know who’s more pathetic, him or his girlfriend,” Charlotte replies, voice full of disdain.

Lacey laughs again. “Gosh, she’s so pathetic. Can you imagine givin’ up your career for someone like him? As a woman it’s insultin’ Sets feminism back, yanno?”

“She wasn’t even that good anyways,” Charlotte replies. “Her not being in the ring isn’t a huge loss.”

“True. That girl is all look and no substance. I mean who even is she other than the valet of the most obnoxious and deluded man in the industry. What does that make her? She probably slept with someone to get her title in NXT.”

Maria’s stomach clenches but she stays hidden, unable to move. She had never really spoken to Charlotte or Lacey but hearing the venom in their voices was catching her off guard. Normally she didn’t care what other people thought of her. But something about their tone stings.

“Wouldn’t surprise me,” Charlotte replies. “If she’s fucking Ace Spade, she’s clearly willing to fuck anyone.”

“Desperation, nasty.”

They laugh. Maria’s hands ball into fists, her manicured nails dig into her palms. Then out of the corner of her eye she sees someone walk past her into catering, Charlotte and Lacey immediately go silent and it’s like the air has shifted. It’s somehow… colder. Maria tilts her head out just enough to see who it was and her eyes widen.

Roman Reigns.

Charlotte and Lacey both stare at him for a moment as he crosses over to the catering table. Lacey combs her fingers through her hair and then puts on her most flirtatious smile.

“Well hello there, Tribal Chief,” she coos. Charlotte rolls her eyes.

Roman says nothing, he doesn’t even look at Charlotte or Lacey. Maria stays where she was, watching. For a few tense moments Roman just looks at the catering table, then he takes a bottle of water and without a word or a look to the women watching him he turns to leave. Lacey watches with a look of disappointment, Charlotte mostly looks unimpressed.

Realizing he’s about to walk past her again Maria steps back a bit, hoping it won’t look like she had been watching the whole thing. As Roman walks by he doesn’t stop but for a moment he looks at her and their eyes meet. Something unreadable flickers in his steely gaze. It roots Maria on the spot. She doesn’t know what it is about that look but it does something to her. But before she can even figure it out, Roman is looking away and walking towards The Bloodline dressing room.

“That was weird, right?” she hears Charlotte’s voice again. “He has his own catering, why come here?”

“I don’t know, but I wouldn’t mind acknowledging him,” Lacey says, meaning obvious.

“Now who’s pathetic?” Charlotte scoffs.

Maria turns, going the opposite way of Roman. She can’t listen to them anymore. Her mind feels like a mess. She usually had a thick skin but something about how they were talking about her really made her feel bad today. The fact they were so dismissive of her. She knows it has been a long time since she stepped into the ring but it didn’t change everything she had accomplished before that. Once she would have gone into catering and chewed the two of them out for talking about her like that. But now it didn’t feel like there was much point. They had clearly already made up their minds about her. And it wasn’t like she could even challenge them to a match to show them how good she was.

She heads back to Ace’s locker room. He wasn’t set to have a proper match tonight but he insisted that they still had to be there. She’s almost at the locker room when she stops, further down the hall she can see Ace talking to… Seth Rollins? Maria’s brow furrows. She didn’t even know Ace and Seth knew each other. And from the way they were talking it was like they didn’t want anyone to hear. After a few moments the two of them laugh and Seth claps Ace on the shoulder before walking away, a huge smirk on his face. As he passes Maria he smiles at her.

“Ready for the show?” he asks.

Maria’s brow furrows. Seth doesn’t wait for an answer as he continues to stride down the hall. Maria watches for a moment before she looks back at Ace who was now in front of her.

“What was that about?” she asks.

“What do you mean?” Ace says, sounding unphased as he picks invisible lint off his coat.

“I just… didn’t know you and Seth were… friends?”

Ace didn’t really have many friends in the company, mostly because he would run his mouth too often no one really wanted anything to do with him.

“He was just giving me a pep talk,” Ace replies. “Game recognizing game. He believes in me, unlike some people.”

Maria knows that was meant as a dig at her and she sighs. “It’s not that I don’t believe in you, I-”

“Really? Because you sure act like you don’t believe in me.”

“Ace that’s not…”

“You don’t think I can beat Roman Reigns.”

“I just want you to be realistic, you can’t just demand a match and expect to win.”

Ace shakes his head. “Unbelievable.”

Maria sighs, deciding it was best to try and change the subject. “So, I’ve been thinking… I want to get in the ring again.”

“What?!” Ace’s eyes narrow.

“I miss wrestling, Ace,” Maria continues. “It’s been a year…”

“And what am I supposed to do? Huh?!” Ace snaps. “I need you in my corner.”

“I am in your corner!”

“No, you’re thinking of yourself again. How can you be so selfish after everything I’ve done for you. You promised me you’d support me.”

“If you really loved me you’d do this for me,” Ace says, snidely. “And you’ll do it with that smile that makes the whole world melt.”

Maria feels like she’s had ice dumped on her. She wants to scream. But she doesn’t. Instead she bottles all of it up. Like she always does. She doesn’t think she can do this much longer.

“Ace I-”

The Bloodline music starts up int he arena then, echoing in the hallways.

“Are you with me or not?” Ace glares at her.

She doesn’t know what to say, she barely knows what to think. Her emotions feel like a mess right now.

“…yeah,” she shrugs.

“Good, we’re a package deal baby,” Ace grins. “I promise you’ll get your turn again but timing is everything.”

He extends his arm to her, she takes it, automatically, and they head down the hall. *****

“Ladies and gentleman, my name is Paul Heyman. And I serve as the special counsel… to the reigning, defending, undisputed Tribal Chief - ROMAAAN REEIGNS”

The crowd roars. The Bloodline stands in the ring. Roman in the centre, title around his waist, with Jimmy and Jey flanking him. Heyman stands nearby, holding Roman’s other title - mic in hand.

Roman then extends his own hand and Heyman obediently hands over the mic with a little bow.

“ACKNOWLEDGE ME!” Roman yells into the mic.

The crowd goes wild yet again, some cheering, others jeering and booing. And Roman waits, soaking all of it in as if daring every person there to disobey him.

“Every week, I walk out here and it’s the same story,” Roman begins his promo, voice dripping with the type of smugness you could only earn. “I smash them. I stack them. I pin them. And then I fly home with my titles… and my legacy still intact.”

He begins to pace a little in the ring. Heyman in the background utters “yes you do my Tribal Chief.” Jimmy and Jey are all smirks.

“The truth is, there’s nobody left. I’ve beaten them all. Every challenger, every so-called superstar who thought that they were on my level.”

The crowd reacts, some booing, some yelling out names of other superstars.

“Nobody can beat you my Tribal Chief,” Heyman says.

Roman smirks. “Now, I keep hearing about this guy. Keeps buzzing around, flapping his mouth backstage, calling my name like he’s earned it.” Roman raises his hand close by his head and makes a gesture like there is a fly buzzing around him, because that’s all this guy was to him. A fly. A bug. Waiting to be squashed.

He then pauses, tilting his head. “What’s his name again, Wiseman?”

“Ace… Ace something, my Tribal Chief. Like a playing card,” Heyman supplies with feigned confusion.

“Right, that guy,” Roman says mockingly. “Couldn’t remember, he hasn’t done anything worth remembering.”

The Usos start laughing, meanwhile the crowd is now eating it up.

“What type of name is that, Uce?” Jey sniggers behind Roman.

“A bad porn star or failed magician,” Jimmy replies.

“Oh, he’s a failed something,” Roman agrees, smirking right into the camera. *****

“He’s taunting me,” Ace growls. “That motherfucker is actually taunting me.”

He was standing in gorilla with Maria and he was fuming. Maria had never seen Ace like this before. Even the veins on his head looked like they might pop.

“That’s just…” Maria puts a hand on Ace’s arm, trying to calm him down. “It’s just what he does. Don’t take it personally.”

“Don’t tell me how to take it!” Ace snaps at her, wrenching his arm back. “I’ve had enough of his bullshit. He thinks he runs this company. Well, it’s about time someone stands up to him. And that someone is going to be me. He doesn’t remember me?! I’m about to make sure he never forgets me!”

“Ace-”

Maria reaches out to grab him again but it’s too late Ace has already ripped a microphone out of the hand of a stage hand and is storming towards the ramp.

“PLAY MY MUSIC!” he yells at the crew.

Maria stares after him.

“Oh, fuck…” she mutters before quickly hurrying after him.

Ace’s music hits as he storms down the ramp, the crowd is shocked. In the ring Roman looks bored he looks at the Usos and Heyman and gestures towards Ace as if to say ‘this guy.’ The Usos meanwhile are already jeering at Ace as he continues to storm down into the ring.

A few moments later Maria is behind Ace, trying to get him to calm down but Ace pays no attention to her. Her climbs into the ring and immediately get into Roman’s face.

Roman’s eyes narrow a fraction as he looks down at Ace, who did he think he was to get so close to him.

“You think you’ve beaten everyone, huh?!” Ace yells into the mic. “You haven’t beaten me. I want a match. You and me, Roman!”

The Usos crack up. Even Heyman starts laughing. Then the crowd does too. After a few beats, Roman smirks a little.

“You want a match? With me?” he looks at Heyman. “Hey Wiseman, is this guy serious?”

“He’s delusional, my Tribal Chief,” Heyman replies. “He’s not fit to lace your boots.”

“FIGHT ME!” Ace yells.

Roman turns back to Ace, still laughing. “What for? There is no challenge in facing you. No title. What do you have that I could possibly want?”

Ace is still fuming. Maria slides into the ring then and goes to him, she puts a hand on his forearm.

“Come on,” she says quietly. “Let’s just-”

Ace wrenches away so hard it causes Maria to stumble a step, which in turn makes Roman’s eyes narrow. He looks directly at her and that same feeling from when their eyes met earlier comes back to her.

“If I were gonna fight someone in this ring… It’d be her,” he gestures to Maria before looking back at Ace. “At least she could keep up. But instead of standing on her own, she’s stuck carrying your dead weight. You got called up and you couldn’t handle the truth, that your girl has and always has been better than you.”

Maria is staring at Roman with wide eyes. The crowd was popping. And then she could hear it, it wasn’t loud but she could hear some fans doing one of her old NXT chants. It made her feel dizzy.

Ace was still fuming but a part of him was starting to panic. He doesn’t look at Maria, he’s not even thinking about her in this moment, not really. His obsession with Roman has never been as intense as it is now.

“Maybe I’ll step into the ring with her anyways,” Roman says mockingly. Show her what it’s like to stand next to a real man. Someone who isn’t afraid of her success or skill.”

The vein in Ace’s head starts throbbing again. “You want her so bad?! Huh?! Is that what you want?” he’s snarling. “You want a prize?! Is that what it’s gonna take for you to fight me?!”

Roman’s eyes narrow but before he can reply Ace continues.

“You and me. A match. You beat me and she’s yours.”

“WHAT?!” Maria’s eyes widen.

For a moment it's silent, like the entire arena needed a second to process what Ace just said. And then it explodes. The crowd goes crazy, the Usos are yelling at Ace, even Heyman is talking but Roman just stares. His eyes cold. His expression deadly. All of Ace’s bravado fades in that moment.

“You really just did that?” Roman says coldly. “You just offered your girlfriend like she’s a… prize?”

Disgust is evident Roman’s face, he wants to punch Ace. He takes a step closer, his voice darker.

“You don’t deserve to be in this ring with me. You don’t deserve to be in any type of ring. But I’ll make an example out of you anyways. You want a match? You’ll get your match.”

With that Roman steps away from him, he doesn’t look at Maria as he exits the ring. Ace stands there, still fuming. Jimmy and Jey go to follow Roman, purposely they both bang their shoulders against Ace on the way out. Heyman then leaves too. Maria is breathing hard she turns to Ace, eyes narrowed.

“Ace what the-”

He doesn’t even look at her. Instead he rolls out of the ring and storms off leaving Maria alone in the ring. Alone with the crowd still going crazy, some cheering, some jeering and booing. She can’t her her chant anymore, maybe she had been imagining it.

In that moment even though she’s surrounded by the bright lights, tens of thousands of fans and the ring she loves so much she has never felt so alone. *****

SMACKDOWN COMMENTARY DESK MICHAEL COLE: (shocked) Did he… did Ace Space just offer his girlfriend as a prize? COREY GRAVES: (flat) He sure did, Cole. I can’t believe I just watched that happen. Real classy move. Nothing screams future Hall of Famer like offering off your girlfriend like a trophy. What is wrong with him? COLE: I’m speechless. That was- GRAVES: (cutting in) Desperate. Embarrassing. And honestly pathetic. What sort of man does that? Especially, to the woman who put her career on hold to support him?! I’m disgusted Cole. Maria doesn’t deserve this. COLE: Maria Marie is a former NXT Women’s Champion, and one of the best technical wrestlers of her generation. She’s not a pawn, not a prop. Certainly not a prize to be wagered. GRAVES: (fuming) Say what you will about the Tribal Chief, but even he looked disgusted. COLE: I just don’t know how to process this. We’ve seen wagers in matches before but something about this one… puts a really bad taste in my mouth. GRAVES: As it should Cole. We always knew Ace Spade was a loudmouth but tonight he proved the exact type of man he really is. He’s not just delusional, he’s desperate. He’s a terrible human being and I personally I can’t wait to see the Tribal Chief punch that smirk right off his face. COLE: If I was Ace Spade, I’d start praying. No way this ends well for him. GRAVES: I don’t know who he should be afraid of more. Roman Reigns? Or Maria. Because if she ever gets her hands on him… he’s not walking out of that ring. *****

It was late. The show had ended hours ago. Maria had no idea where Ace was and at the moment she didn’t really care. She was back in the gym, using the punching bag. Her thoughts were a jumbled mess right now and she had no idea how to even begin to process them. So she used her fists instead. Normally she was so controlled, her punches always landing exactly where she intended but tonight thy were harder, faster, almost erratic. Her fists were slamming into the bag like it was something cruel. Like it was an amalgamation of the last year.

“I don’t know who’s more pathetic, him or his girlfriend.” “How can you be so selfish after everything I’ve done for you.” “If you really loved me you’d do this for me.” “If she’s fucking Ace Spade, she’s clearly willing to fuck anyone.” “You and me. A match. You beat me and she’s yours.”

The words play over and over in her mind and she can’t stop punching. Because if she stops then she needs to think and she can’t do that right now. If she thinks she’ll fall apart.

She hits the bag again.

And again.

Her shoulders burned. Her arms were starting to tremble. She can feel sweat dripping down her skin. She’s punching like her life depending on it.

She can’t stop. Stopping means unravelling. And she can’t do that. She refuses to do that. Not now. Not over Ace. Even if a tiny part of her wants to. Needs to more than anything else.

And then she can’t hold back anymore, she screams. Raw, ragged, guttural. With all the strength she has left she throws one final punch.

The chain snaps. The heavy bag hits the floor like dead weight. The sound echoing off the walls and down the hall and it feels so oppressively loud Maria almost wants to put her trembling hands over her ears. Instead she staggers back, gasping for breath. She stars down at the falling bag. She still doesn’t cry. It was like her body was betraying her by refusing to allow her that release.

And then she collapses on the mat, rolling onto her back to stare at the ceiling. She was just… done. *****

Roman saw the whole thing. Everyone else had left. Even Heyman was long gone. But Roman had stayed late tonight, he wasn’t really sure why. Maybe a part of him had hoped he’d see her again in the gym. Or maybe he just liked it when the halls were empty and quiet, the lights dimmed. He was getting ready to leave when he heard the sound of the bag being used and he knew.

It was Maria.

He couldn’t help but follow the sound. Once again he stands in the shadows and watches her. Even now her pony tail was perfect, it didn’t even look like her makeup had smudged. But there were fractures in her control. It was like she was finally unravelling and he couldn’t look away or move.When she screamed and fell to the mat he still didn’t move. He remembered Heyman’s words from the other night, saying what a shame it was that Maria had given up. Roman saw it then but it’s clear as day to him now. This wasn’t a woman who had given up. The fight was still there but she had been buried under someone else’s story. And despite himself, Roman can’t help but think how beautiful she looks in this moment.

And then mentally he’s scolding himself for thinking that. He was the Tribal Chief, this woman was just another wrestler. Other than asserting his dominance there was really no reason to think about her at all. He was about to step back and leave her when a side door creaks open and of all people Shotzi Blackheart walks in.

“Knew I’d find you here,” Shotzi says, a duffel bag slung over her shoulder as she makes her way over to Maria who was still on the ground. She glances at the punching bag. “Remind me never to piss you off.”

Maria says nothing.

Shotzi seems unphased and dropped the duffel to the ground and then flops down next to Maria, laying next to her like it was the most normal thing in the world. Like they had done this dozens of times.

“You’re sleeping over tonight. No arguing,” she says.

Maria says nothing.

“Company policy,” Shotzi continues, her tone casual like she was talking about the weather. “Damage WWE property, get put under a 24-hour emotional surveillance watch.”

“That’s not a thing,” Maria croaks.

“It is so a thing. How do you think Miz and Maryse started dating.”

Maria huffs a little at that, almost a laugh. For a few moments they just lay there next to each other on the floor. Shotzi didn’t ask Maria if she was okay, she didn’t need too - she knew. Asking would just be insulting. After a few moments, Maria extends a shaking hand over to Shotzi, who’s own hand meets her halfway. Their fingers intertwine. Maria’s hands stop shaking.

Roman can’t look away. These two women looked like the came from different worlds, different planets even. Shotzi was chaos incarnate, tattoos, piercings and a wildness that couldn’t be tamed. Maria was perfected control, elegant with an air of elegance to her. They could not be more different. But it looked like they had been friends forever. His jaw tics a little, this made him feel something and he wasn’t sure he liked it. So he slinks back into the shadows to leave. *****

After few more moments, Shotzi helps Maria to her feet. She grabs the duffel bag which was full of Maria’s things and slings an arm around her friends shoulders.

“You know, just say the word and I bet we can get the whole locker room to beat the shit out of him,” she grins. “Sami was practically vibrating and K.O. never needs a reason, he’d do it just for fun.”

“Can we get noodles first?”

“Fuck yes!” Shotzi’s grin turns into a smirk.

Shotzi guides Maria towards the door but then Maria stops, out of the corner of her eye she thought she saw something. She turns towards one of the dark hallways, brow furrowed.

“You good?” Shotzi asks.

“Yeah I thought I just… saw someone,” Maria says softly.

Shotzi looks in that direction. “It’s probably just the crew waiting for you to leave so they can do take down.”

“Yeah,” Maria takes a deep breath. “You’re probably right.”

Then she follows Shotzi out the door.

#roman reigns fanfiction #roman reigns fic #roman reigns x oc #wwe fanfiction #wwe fic #wwe oc #wwe original character #fic: love me like i’m not made of stone #wrestling fic #wrestling fanfiction #oc: maria marie #roman x maria #!my fic #!mine #and now that i posted this i need to go hide #because i am never happy with my writing

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moirindeclermont · 10 months ago

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This episode of "All the Polin first time we didn't see in BridgertonS3 " is a request I've received. Some may find it squirmish, so TW for period talking and blood, just so you know what you get into.

And this is either in a universe where she didn't get pregnant right away (Colin "Blackdecker" Bridgerton might sometimes miss, who knows?) or after her pregnancy; either way, it's the first time they are properly together, and Pen gets her period. She is lucky it didn't arrive at night, so she didn't need to request new bed linens. Of course, her mama told her that when she had her courses, she could not expect Colin to attend to her, so she asked for their guest chamber to be prepared.

Of course, Colin being Colin "propriety what?" Bridgerton has none of it. At first, he is scared he said something that might have driven her away or that she is ill—Rae said something like, "Mrs Bridgerton is indisposed today." He marched right into the guest chamber where she was lying, a heating pad on her stomach. He understood right away. He sat on the bed.

"Pen, you don't need to hide your courses from me. I am very much used to it. I have four sisters, and I have assisted them all. Are you in much pain?" She shakes her head. "Just a bit of discomfort; I should be up by tomorrow. It is just today." Colin nods. "What do you need from me?" Pen smiles at him. "I know propriety dictated otherwise, but would you just hold me for a while?" Colin looks at her. "Propriety dictates otherwise? Really?" Pen would like to laugh, but she knows better.

"You won't know propriety if it hit you with a stick," she banters with him, making spaces for him on the bed. He lies down, his body fitting perfectly against hers, holding the heating pad in place. They stay like that for a moment. Pen is almost sleeping now that she has Colin on her side.

Up until Colin kissed her shoulder, "I met an old woman on my journeys, and she was much like a midwife. She told me—and the entire crew—that if a woman is in pain because of her courses, a release could be most beneficial," Pen turned around, "Really? It doesn't concern you that you'll have blood on your fingers and... elsewhere." Pen was not completely opposed to the idea, even though it was the first time she had encountered such a theory.

"Why? It's just blood. We can clean ourselves later. And if you're worried about the sheets, I can ask for some old ones to put under. If you don't like it, we can just stop." Pen nodded, and Colin was there a moment later with a couple of old linens to put under. "I've asked the servant to run a bath for us so we can clean after. Now, your job is to just relax and let me do all the work. How does that sound?"

She did as she was told. Colin helped her to get naked, and he started by kissing her. His touch was light, which was much appreciated given her sensitivity. "Not too much, Colin; I'm so sore," she told him, and he gave her breasts the lightest pinch that still made her moan. When he opened her legs, he made sure to touch her exactly how she liked it. Colin made her come on his finger moments after, giving her time to recover and using that time to clean his fingers and disrobe himself.

"How are you doing, Pen? Do you want more," Pen could only nod as he entered her. As he promised, he was doing all the work, letting her moan and sob, grabbing her derriere to give depth to his thrusts. Pen took a glance down at where they were joined, and surprisingly, the sight didn't turn her off as she expected. It was powerful and intimate like they were always. There was something so primal in being taken like that, something that drove Pen's next release further higher.

Afterwards, sated and sleepy, she closed her eyes, feeling Colin cleaning himself and her and changing the sheet as well. She felt suspended, like a cloud. And while the pain was not magically gone, it was drastically reduced. Maybe the old midwife was right.

After some minutes, Colin was next to her, his comforting presence enveloping her like a warm blanket, spooning like before. "Thank you, husband. I believe I won't curse my courses as much from today on..." Colin smiled. "Always glad to be of service, Pen," before lulling her into sleep.

#polin #bridgerton #bridgerton season 3 #bridgerton s3 #polin positivity #polin bridgerton #polin brainrot #polin fic #colin bridgerton #colin x penelope #penelope bridgerton #penelope x colin

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random-bs-is-found-here · 2 months ago

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Soo I'm thinking of getting back into writing (for real this time) and I decided to write a short reunion story for each LaDS LI using this prompt I came up with:

One year ago, you disappeared without a trace. Everyone assumed you were long dead by now. But He hadn't given up on you. Until now. When He finally begin to accept that you might be really gone, He suddenly spots you in the distance. However, something's not right... You changed. Drastically.

Basically, this would all be about them finding you in different states of trauma. There would be a lot of angst while they try to reconnect and make you remember them (cause in all of their stories, you lost some, if not all of your memories of your previous life). Before I forget to mention, each story will be a crossover with a different fandom MC got isekai'd into out of nowhere.

Except for Zayne, I already have a good idea of what I'm going to write for each of the boys. I just have a hard time deciding who to write and when, which one should I prioritize.

Therefore, I'd like to ask you all which one do you want to see get written first the most!

Here are some things the stories are definitely going to include! Spoiler alert, if not interested, don't read!

Xavier: Since I'll be using my Hisui main team, you're going to have a shiny Golem.

Zayne: He's going to get hit by Petrificus Totalus.

Rafayel: "Not accepting quests" "Cutie WTF"

Sylus: You attack him with a hatchet.

Caleb: His colonel uniform sends you slightly into panic

Thank you in advance!

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fellthemarvelous · 1 year ago

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Invisible scars

(TW: religious trauma)

Looking at me, you wouldn't know that I've survived religious trauma. The marks of religious trauma are seldom visible. In fact, I had no idea for the longest time that I had religious trauma (I thought it was a thing that happened to other people). I simply spent decades questioning the reasons I felt like I was so broken on in the inside. I kept trying to figure out what I was doing wrong and why I never felt happy or like I was never able to connect to anyone. I had no idea that my experience with the church as a small child is what shaped me into the anxiety-ridden, majorly depressed disaster creature I am today.

I spent 12 years learning inside of Catholic schools. It has taken me more than 20 years to process and deconstruct, and I am always going to be a work in progress. I was brainwashed into believing the very worst about myself, and I was always just beyond saving because I had the misfortune of being a woman in a church that taught us that women experience pain during childbirth as a natural consequence of Eve eating the apple, which is why they enjoy making us suffer in the first place. They taught us that Adam ate the apple because Eve seduced him, so even though Adam also ate the apple, his sin still wasn't as bad as Eve's because she did it first and used sex to get him to do the same. They placed the blame for Original Sin squarely on Eve and thus onto every single girl who entered the church. If a boy did something to me that I didn't like, it's probably because I did something to provoke him first.

Do you know what I learned to do at a very young age just to be able to cope with that?

I learned to use humor to deflect when I was struggling. I smile when I don't want people to know I'm sad. I laugh at inappropriate times, especially when I'm uncomfortable. I learned to bottle up all of my emotions because expressing anything other than happiness is bad. I learned to compartmentalize. I taught myself how to pull out the right emotion for the right occasion because I was always striving to be who I thought everyone else wanted me to be. It was exhausting.

In the midst of all of this, I'm trying to figure out which parts of me are really me and which parts of me are things that were put into my head. If you've experienced indoctrination, you know what I'm talking about. They pulled us apart as small children and placed us in specific boxes and told us that deviating from the norm was bad.

Crowley is a fallen angel. His change from angel to demon is drastic on the outside.

You know he fell and that his wings turned black and he ended up in a pool of boiling sulfur. It's the reason Crowley is so easy to sympathize with. He suffered unfairly because of arbitrary rules that deemed him unforgivable. He's accepted that part of himself. He's clever and creative and it has helped him find ways to get out of doing his job for centuries. Hell doesn't care how jobs get done just as long as someone does them, and at this point humanity is doing more to damn themselves than the demons are able to keep up with. They're tired and overworked. Hell is overpopulated even though it should be infinite in size. Crowley wants no part of that system because he sees it for what it is, just as he sees Heaven for what it is. He has the marks to prove that he is one of the damned, but that has given him all the perspective he needs to see that both sides are fucked up and toxic and "irredeemable" (just like him). He has yet to fully let go of the hold Heaven has over him because of how badly he got hurt.

Aziraphale is still an angel.

He never fell, and he doesn't know why. He has lied to God. He has lied to Gabriel repeatedly. He lies to protect Crowley. He lies to protect humanity.

Remember, Crowley and Aziraphale started off in the same place.

They both started off as angels who were created to do God's bidding. Aziraphale is the one who told Crowley what he'd heard about everything shutting down in 6,000 years. He was simply trying to make conversation. He didn't think it was something Crowley would object to. Angels were just supposed to go along with God's plans, but Crowley had a different opinion and was vocal about it. Where did Aziraphale get his information in the first place? Why does nobody ever ask this question?

Aziraphale knows Heaven is toxic. He's not blind. We need to move past this idea that because he still has love for God that he doesn't know Heaven is fucked up. He never fell, and it's something he still fears because who the hell doesn't fear the thought of eternal torment, especially if you know it's real? God has never cast him out of Heaven though and he doesn't know why. It's probably something that hangs over his head like the Sword of Damocles.

Letting go is not an easy task. Aziraphale has always been an angel. He didn't have his identity ripped from him the same way that Crowley did. Crowley had to adapt to a brand new way of existing because he was cast out of Heaven.

Crowley's trauma is evident on the outside. Aziraphale's trauma is hidden on the inside. Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't there.

Crowley was an angel and then he was a demon, but he doesn't want to be labeled as either.

Aziraphale has only ever known how to be an angel. He's only ever known the ways of Heaven.

I'm only in my early 40s. It has taken me 20+ years to undo 12 years of religious abuse. Aziraphale is immortal. He and Crowley have abandoned their jobs, but four years in the space of millions isn't a lot. No one overcomes indoctrination in four years. Especially when you had millions of years of blind obedience indoctrinated into you. It simply does not work that way no matter how much you want to believe it can.

It has taken me more than two decades to learn how to stop hating myself. I still have no idea how to love myself, but it's something I'm trying to learn.

My entire identity was wrapped up in what the church told me it would be. Once I fully denounced it and all organized religion, I found out I had no idea who I was. No one had prepared me for a life outside of this one very specific identity and role that I was expected to fill based on a very specific box I was placed into.

I still struggle with black and white concepts. It's hard to unlearn when you have no other basis for comparison, but that doesn't mean it's impossible. It means that these changes do not and will not ever happen overnight.

The fall didn't just affect the demons though. It affected the angels as well. Look at how tightly wound the angels are. They're always trying to do the good thing, but they have no idea what that actually means, and you realize this when Uriel asks The Metatron if they had done something wrong. They are scared of making mistakes, but none of them know what they are supposed to be doing since Gabriel disrupted the status quo. You can see they are unsure of themselves and of each other. The concept of free will is so foreign to them, but Aziraphale showed all of them that it was in their grasp when he allowed Gabriel and Beelzebub to decide where to go so they could be together.

It takes a lot of audacity (and sheer ignorance) to dismiss Aziraphale as power-hungry and abusive.

Aziraphale did nothing to punish Gabriel and Beelzebub. He allowed them to leave because they were in love with each other, and he knows what that feels like. He thought he was about to get the same fate with Crowley until The Metatron showed up and refused to take no for an answer.

He doesn't want to fix Heaven because he thinks it's perfect. If he thought it was perfect he wouldn't want to fix it.

Aziraphale is going back into the Lion's Den. He knows what he's going up against. He's been humiliated and belittled and abused by Heaven for thousands of years.

His scars are there even though you can't see them, and he hides his pain with humor and silliness.

When I see people advocating for Aziraphale to suffer even more because they don't think he has suffered enough, I find myself sitting back in one of those classrooms in Catholic school being told that I deserve the bad things that happen to me because I somehow failed to measure up to some impossible metric. The cruelty of that mindset aimed at Aziraphale is kinda the reason Crowley hates Heaven in the first place because he's been there too.

And as someone who is processing religious trauma, it's disheartening to see people say that because Aziraphale has yet to fully let go of Heaven that he deserves harsher treatment. Crowley would definitely not agree with that sentiment.

#good omens #crowley #aziraphale #religious trauma #ex catholic #i don't know if this makes sense #i know the discourse on religious trauma is already another thing in this fandom #but this is how i process #deconstructing isn't fucking easy

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oceansarepink · 8 months ago

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I wouldn't blame anyone for finding Look My Way too Stolas-sympathetic and weepy but honestly I think on the whole it's way better than most of the songs he gets in the show

and that's because it actually has a narrative arc to it. Stolas reflects on his life, realizes he is the problem between him and Blitzo, actually shows some empathy for the armor Blitzo has developed as a result of being impoverished, then decides on an action: making amends for making Blitzo a means to an end. and it retains his original classist character by having the impish plaything line that the show whitewashed over

it still has the same problem anything Stolas related does in that it's hard to care about his repeated pleas for Blitzo to look his way, but it's a far more concise view of him as a character and crucially he actually shows some ability to self reflect in it and then take action based on his conclusions

ParanoidDJ released the original after ep6 but honestly it would fit perfectly in the show after ep7, where Stolas comes back in from the party. instead of getting drunk, maybe he stops and makes himself think about where things went wrong

instead the songs he has in the show are

Stolas Sings - immediately implies Blitzo lied to him, so no self reflection or introspection. It's set up he'll go to get a crystal but that isn't referenced in the lyrics, it's just a split second freeze frame when he chucks his book into view of the camera which is bad storytelling. It's all self focused self pity - he's the victim and that's that. no sign of care for what he's done to Blitzo or Via unlike Look My Way.

All 2 U - a breakup reflection where he does no self reflection or introspection. blames Blitzo for stuff he did (let him get too close/go on too long/fell too far). all self focused self pity - he's the victim and that's that

duet number - does say he maybe did something wrong, but it only counts if Blitzo didn't actually want him (then when Blitzo confirms that, he proceeds to...show no self reflection or introspection - just he's the victim and that's that, you get the idea)

the show numbers not only fail to move the plot forward, they don't move Stolas' character forward at all. Look My Way really sticks out as one of his numbers because it's basically the only one where he does explicitly say 'I'm in the wrong and need to fix things' where in the show it's always 'maybe I did something wrong, maybe, but you hurt me so you're more wrong and I'm putting off doing any self reflection on what my issues are until Tuesday - when I'll put it off again'.

he's far more proactive in LMW too - he doesn't sound like he'll just give up on making amends at the first failure. meanwhile Show Stolas has done only two proactive things when it comes to Blitzo onscreen: making the deal and breaking the deal. both things were done for his own benefit and he's now back to being passive and expecting Blitzo to be the one to come crawling back to court him even though Blitzo has every reason to think he moved on with the succubus dude to spite him in particular

This moment here

It wasn’t him feeling some guilt/remorse for how obnoxious and forceful he behaved, or sympathy for Blitzs unhappiness. He is thinking “Aww….he doesn’t love me, that makes me so sad. Poor me. I deserve love. I just want a lover.”

Well anon, the simple explanation LMW stolas is so different…..is, Vivienne/Sam Haft didn’t write that. They both do think stolas is the more innocent and more victimised party. That’s why before Full Moons confrontation, stolas has sung not one, not two but three sad ballads about his soft boy romantic feelings. And it’s why stolas’ personality was changed drastically between his nasty truth seekers self to his Ozzies bleeding heart self. To make you forget his 1-6 self ever happened and pity him.

While blitz was only allowed to smirk and make sex jokes in a verse of stolas’ third sad song. With the intent of making him look like the “real” pervert with a cold black heart. His verse in when I see him was intended by Sam to set up “that your first instinct is that it’s always (gasp) about sex (closes eyes solemnly)” line. Stolas is allowed to have an inner monologue, desires, worries, regrets and hopes. Blitz is only allowed say “fuck” “penis” and “im traumatised”** with an asterisk saying that makes him an asshole and not “baby” stolas’ fault. Spoken to you in apology tour dialogue delivered by the lovely: Vivienne Mayday aka Verosika Medrano.

Viv didn’t write look my way, and disagrees with the narrative.

She hates Octavia for not being more grateful to her father and thinks stolas deserves to be free from being her parent. So took his line about her out of the song. Twitter emboldened her to go through with this belief. So she took her line out of LMW.

She hates blitz for disliking upper classes, implies he’s “just like a supremacist” against princes for it. I think this also came from Twitter. You are NOT allowed to point out the racism of stolas or you’ll be branded a striker sympathiser.

She agrees with stolas fans that the real reason blitz doesn’t trust stolas’ gifts with no catch is nothing to do with stolas’ previous exploitative transactional actions….it is….because of his own mean imp father? Because Cash taught him love is transaction. A very convenient excuse Viv absorbed again, from Twitter and YouTube.

Cuz….it was cash. Not the sexual extorter who held his job over his head. That’s his soulmate cause owls only mate once via eye contact and die of broken hearts if they can’t have their mate forever. His 25 year long lust for someone he only knew as a child isn’t weird at all wdym. In fact all the bad stuff is Blitzs fault.

She absorbed all of this nonsense from Twitter takes, specifically the stolas stans, because she thinks putting fandom talking points into canon is a safe bet. The actual story is out the window, there isn’t one.

See how letting the stolas fandom twitter write your story for you makes for a biased fucked up victim blaming story that coddles a sexual abuser with “involuntarily celibate” arguments?

When she makes stolas reflect and take accountability, the reaction she wants you to have is “Poor baby stolas blames himself which shows what a good little boy he is! Even though nothing is ever his fault!” She just wanted to make money off of someone else’s work.

#helluva boss critical #stolitz critical

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bnhaobservation · 7 months ago

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I think that Shigaraki was absolutely right about the Hero Society and he should have been allowed to destroy it along with his LoV friends!

Well...

Tomura was mostly right on Hero society but Tomura destroying it sadly wouldn't have created a better world.

Something Tomura is often scolded for how he has no plan, he has no real aim to build up something, anything.

He's kind of an anarchist, he's against all forms of authority and seeks to abolish the institutions it claims maintain unnecessary coercion and hierarchy, advocating for the replacement of the state with stateless society. He doesn't really want to rule, he just wants to destroy the rules that currently exist because they're wrong.

I doubt though he would manage to mantain an anarchic state of things were he to destroy Hero society.

My guess, had he managed to destroy society fully and not just partially in the Paranormal Liberation War (where he was not yet possessed) we could have had two possible developments after.

The first is that Re-Destro and/or his underlings of the Meta Liberation Army (like Trumpet, Skeptic and the nameless Heteromorph guys) would have eventually tried to take control (maybe poisoning Tomura or tricking him in any other way and having the rest of the league follow shortly were they try to oppose).

While Tomura claims people must be free and the MLA seemed to claim the same, hence they could join forces, the MLA isn't anarchic but it's more on the Darwinist side. They apply biological concepts of natural selection and survival of the fittest to sociology, economics and politics and believe that the strong should see their wealth and power increase, while the weak should see their wealth and power decrease. For them what makes a person weak or strong is their Quirk so of course a Quirkless person would be worthless for example while people with strong Quirk should rule.

In the long run this would just end up replacing the ruling powers in the Hero society without changing much the general idea.

The second option is that, as he has always planned to do AFO would take control of Tomura and rule from his body.

AFO is autoritarian and totalitarian, in short he wants to promote a dictatorship with him as the sole rule of the world. As 'all should be for him' a person value would be tied to how useful one would be to him. There would be no freedom.

So yeah, Hero society wasn't good, but in comparison, for the masses it's better.

At the end of his manga though, Horikoshi tries to 'replace' Hero society with a more collectivistic one. People should view themselves and others as members of a collective unit who should hold collective responsibility for the helping other people. They all should do their best to reach out and save people, not just Heroes.

If this could be realistically applied to everyone yeah, it would be a better society because no one would be left behind... because people like Tomura, Himiko, Touya, Jin, Iguchi would have been helped not abandoned... but in the story it mostly works in his story because people get 'magically' inspired by Midoriya to reach out and do their best, Uraraka's Quirk program 'magically' fixes everything, and Hawks' new Hero ranking somehow also 'magically' inspire people.

I guess Shouji also gave his contribute against Quirk racism but Hero society had already magically confined it solely to rural areas and, anyway, even if Shouji gets a award for his efforts in finding peaceful solutions for conflicts surrounding discrimination, we aren't told he has drastically reduced conflicts, just that now Shouji solves them pacifically. How it's up to speculation.

I don't want to sound bitter but the problem is that the story tackled real life problems like abuse, homeless, discrimination, manipulation and so on and then said 'If everyone cared and nobody cried / If everyone loved and nobody lied / And if everyone shared and swallowed their pride / Then we'd see the day when nobody died' so everyone should be inspired by Midoriya to care!

I'm of course oversimplifying the message, but somehow I feel the story made the solution too easy, case in point how Uraraka tells Togata and the others (who have no preparation whatsoever to deal with kids with Quirk troubles) how they'll surely spot signals (with the implication they also surely will be able to fix whatever problem there is) when in real life professionals can miss signals and fail to help.

I get optimism but when it's over the top it ends up downplaying difficulties too much in a way that feels unreal.

Sorry, this wasn't exactly what you were asking and, I fear, I ended up letting my bitterness for the ending be a tad too evident, but I wanted the story to just give a better world to Tomura and Co, and this would have helped me to believe something could be done for the others in similar conditions too, and the story instead went and killed Tomura and Co and then told me 'but fear not, because now we'll stop people from turning into Tomura, because now we'll be nicer and we'll try hard and look, didn't we save random kid with tragic backstory in a blink?' and it only felt forced to me.

But whatever, maybe it's just me.

Sorry again for derailing in my answer so much and thank you for your ask!

#Shigaraki Tomura #Yotsubashi Rikiya #Todoroki Touya #Toga Himiko #Iguchi Shuuichi #Sako Atsuhiko #Chikazoku Tomoyasu #Hanabata Koukuu #Shigaraki #Midoriya Izuku #Uraraka Ochako #Shouji Mezou #bnha spoilers #mha meta #bnha meta #Ask

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redtsundere-writes · 1 year ago

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Out Of My League | Heartsteel!Kayn Shieda

heartsteel!kayn shieda x f!reader

Part 4: Valentine's Day Special!

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.

Sypnosis: A chronically online girl doesn't know how to deal with his famous boyfriend lifestyle. Contents: Modern AU, Kayn is a nice boyfriend, High School AU, a verbal fight, fake dating vibes but not really. Word Count: 6871 words. Author's Note: So I tried posting this on Valentine's but my date with my boyfriend ended up being longer than I expected. Sowwy, but here it is, lol

Part 4: Valentine's Day Special “For the love of God, do something!” You screamed desperately into the microphone of your headphones.

You were playing a match of League of Legends with your online friends. Your fingers moved quickly on the keyboard, your eyes didn’t take off of the screen, and the offenses of your friends bombed your ears. You were playing as Qiyana, sometimes you missed playing with Kayn as Zed.

"This was so winnable, and you fucked it up, man!" You exclaimed in frustration as you saw the “Defeat” sign flash on your screen.

Winter break was about to end. It's been six months since Kayn asked you to be his girlfriend. Once he graduated from high school, he signed a contract with Riot Records to become a star alongside Heartsteel. You hadn't seen him in over two months, but he always made sure to send you gifts so you wouldn't miss him so much. His gifts ranged from official Heartsteel merchandise to video games and jewelry. Your favorite gift so far was one of his silver earrings so you could match despite not being physically together.

“Nah, but how good is this Qiyana?” Your friend matched your energy, to which your other friends laughed. You wanted to keep a serious posture, but you couldn't.

"Hey, where’s Rhaast?" Your friend with his favorite waifu on his profile picture asked.

"I don't know, he hasn't reached out in a while," you lied.

You knew exactly where he was. He was in another country preparing for his last concert of his world tour with Heartsteel. After he graduated, Kayn quickly adapted to the rock star life. Spending all day writing music, meeting fans and traveling to many places with his guitar. He always sent you photos of the places he visited, the new foods he tried, and the talented people he worked with. Every day, he promised you that he would show you the world once you graduated from high school.

You had a good relationship where you were in constant communication, there was just one small problem. Your relationship was a secret. When Kayn signed his contract with Riot Records to become a star, his manager found out that he had a girlfriend. He only asked him to keep the relationship as private as possible. If he was going to be part of a boy band, the group's popularity might decrease if fans found out that a girl is the owner of his heart.

Kayn thought you would be upset with him for wanting to keep the relationship a secret, but he was surprised to find that you had no problem doing so. As an introvert, you don't like to be the center of attention. If everyone knew that you were a celebrity's girlfriend, you would lose your privacy and not feel comfortable.

Keeping the relationship private was the best for both, although it took Kayn longer to adjust to the idea. When he went on his first tour, he called you every night to remind you how much he loved you and missed you. He often told you how much he missed your hugs, kisses, and caresses. You missed him too, but it wasn't such a drastic change because you were already used to spending your nights alone playing video games or watching live streams.

You heard the sound that announced that you had received a message via Discord, and you didn't hesitate to see what it was about. It was nothing more and nobody less than Kayn. He had sent you a selfie of him with Ezreal before going on stage. He had taken it before giving his phone to his personal assistant to keep while he got busy.

“Is your girlfriend going to watch the show?” Ezreal asked him as he stretched backstage.

The loud music, the screams of the excited fans and the Heartsteel’s team running back and forth to make sure everything was okay. Kayn warmed up his muscles before going on stage. It was the last concert of the tour, and he didn’t want to ruin it. He was nervous, not as nervous as at his first concert, where he almost peed himself. Kayn still remembers that day when he saw his beautiful girlfriend in the audience for a split second and almost lost his balance. He wasn't as nervous as that time, but his hands didn't stop sweating.

“Yes, I sent him the ticket code,” Kayn answered, visibly excited.

The alarm on your phone went off. The legend “Heartsteel Concert ” shined on the screen in white letters. You smiled at the phone and closed the League tab to search the page where the event will be broadcast live.

"Hey, I'm leaving," you notified your friends as you reopened the Discord to leave the call.

“Where are you going? It's barely 7 PM,” your friend asked, confused.

You had gotten them used to the fact that you could play with them until 1 in the morning. Plus, they knew you didn't have many friends other than Rhaast and some classmates from your music class. After your confession was a success, the music class teacher asked you to help your classmates often, forcing you to make some friends.

“I'm going to watch Heartsteel’s concert,” you answered.

"Don’t tell me you're one of those crazy Heartbeats," he mocked.

“Yesterday I saw that some Heartbeats attacked another one who had gotten tickets to the last show,” another member of the group commented.

The fandom of Heartsteel grew rapidly every day. The larger the community, the percentage of aggressive fans increases. You saw every day on Twitter how the Heartbeats were fighting with other fandoms, especially with the K/DA fans. The amount of +18 fan art you had seen of your boyfriend fucking Ezreal was surprising. Although you saved a couple to bother him later.

“Well, their music is addictive,” you answered with part of the truth. “But anyway, the concert is almost starting. Bye,” and with that, you left the call.

You typed in the code Kayn had sent you so you could access the livestream. While it started, you went to the kitchen to make yourself some popcorn and grabbed your favorite chips from the pantry. You pulled a blanket off your bed and got comfortable in your chair as the screen announced the countdown.

When the timer reached zero, Paranoia's extended intro began to play. The audience screamed and applauded with excitement that the concert would finally begin after a day full of expectations. Yellow and purple lights flashed on the stage. The main screen showed the music video they had recorded for that song, while the side screens showed the spectacular entrance of the members. Yone and Aphelios were at the mixing console, they looked so focused on doing their job. Then Kayn came in, rapping the first verse.

Two sides to the story, but they never tell my side.

You kicked your feet in your seat when you saw him. He looked as cool as ever. Her pink hair with purple tips swayed against the air. He held the microphone in such a way that he could easily maneuver the change of hand. His navy blue leather jacket gleamed against the light, his crop top hugged his pecs perfectly, and the pants were as tight as they needed to highlight his figure.

"Kayn looks good!" You squealed with excitement without taking your eyes off the screen.

The concert went off normally. Ezreal singing his heart out, K'Sante interacting with fans and Sett rhyming with Kayn. You ate, sang and screamed from the comfort of your room. Kayn would sometimes fix her hair in front of the broadcast camera to proudly show off the earring you shared. You couldn't help but touch the earring in your ear proudly with a smile on your face.

It was the show’s halftime, where the band answered some questions to interact with the audience and let their bodies rest for a couple of minutes. They showed the livestream chat on the main screen behind Yone and Aphelios so they could read what the fans were saying.

“Say hello to our beautiful chat!” Ezreal asked the fans in the auditorium. The fans screamed and raised their lightsticks to the sky. You rushed to write something nice in the chat so that it would appear in the broadcast.

You: Hello! Kayn looks as handsome as ever!

Kayn quickly recognized your user among the hundreds of comments that cascaded across the screen. His cheeks flushed red, and he smiled widely at the compliment. That day he had asked the stylists to fix him as best as possible because he wanted to impress you. The effort was noticeable.

“How about we answer some questions from the chat?” Sett offered.

“That seems fine to me. EzrealLover69 asks: Who would you dedicated this concert to?” Yone announced the question, while Aphelios played a song that sounded like something that would reproduce in TV quiz shows.

“I want to dedicate this concert to my mom. Hello mom, I'm on television!” Sett responded as he waved at one of the cameras.The fans were touched.

“I want to dedicate it to Ernest, our pup,” K'Sante answered as they posted a photo of the beautiful Doberman they had adopted last month. The fans were crazy about the boys' cute comments.

"What about you, Kayn? Who do you want to dedicate this concert to?” Ezreal asked him, since it was his turn to answer.

“This tour has been very important for me because I always loved music and wanted it to be part of my life,” Kayn began while looking at the livestream camera. He paused briefly for the fans to get excited by his response. “I want to dedicate this concert to my haters. This is for those who didn't believe in me, bitches,” he said while flipping off the camera.

“I didn't expect anything less from him,” you thought as you shook your head. The members of Heartsteel laughed at the comment, while the audience went crazy because of his savageness. Kayn was drunk with the praise from his fandom. He felt good in his cloud 9, and no one could bring him down from there.

“Although I also want to dedicate it to someone very important to me… This concert is for my girlfriend,”

You choked on the popcorn you were eating. The band and the audience remained silent before the unexpected comment. A collective “what?!" resounded through the auditorium. Kayn was so comfortable in his cloud that he didn't even realize the mistake he made.

“My girlfriends! All of you! Heartbeats are my girlfriends!” Kayn clarified in an attempt to correct his mistake. Given that, there were two reactions: the fans who did not believe at all and a confused audience by the apparent mistake.

"Kayn, you idiot!" You exclaimed as you stood up from your seat. Your popcorn fell to the ground, as the chances of still being his girlfriend after that.

You walked from side to side across your room to calm your anxiety while Heartsteel featured the next song. “This isn't happening,” you thought in panic. You returned to your desktop to open Twitter and see the reactions of the fans. The clip of Kayn saying “This concert is for my girlfriend” was spreading like wildfire.

Kaynchokeme: MY SWEET BEAN HAS A GIRLFRIEND?!

Ezkaynisreal: If Kayn has a girlfriend, I'm going kms.

Daddyyone: Kayn biased be like: ☠️

ApheliosLover69: Kayn really made a mistake? 🤔

SettMeUp: KAYN IS FUCKING CHEATING ON US 😭

"They're not buying it." You thought out loud as you watched the endless threads of tweets while Kayn sang in your ear on the other tab.

The concert ended with fireworks, screams from the audience, and a shirtless Kayn. When the livestream ended, you sent your boyfriend a message telling him that you needed to talk. You had spent the rest of the concert reading Twitter threads where many fans began to expose theories of who could be the Kayn girlfriend’s and the vast majority were aiming at you.

Several fans found the newspaper reporting the first concert of Heartsteel, which was at your school when the talent show was. The students at your school, who were fans of Kayn since before he became a star, rumored that sometimes they saw him with you. But there was never enough evidence that proved there was something more than a friendship between you.

The only thing that made you look like a couple was a photo that Kayn had uploaded to his Instagram of you and the other members of the production team in the studio. There was nothing wrong with that photo. He had taken the photo of you while listening to Ezreal sing, making you look like you were part of the production. The only thing wrong with that photo was that you could see the earring that you shared, implying that their relationship is important to him, but it did not confirm anything.

Kayn called you on Discord after he showered in his hotel room. It was a video call, so you could see him shirtless and in all his glory. The window was open behind him, so you could see the lights of a darkened city.

“You saw me? It was a great concert!” He said, excited while drying his hair with a white towel. Some of his pink dye was lingering on the towel.

“Yes, it was a great concert… And a great confession! How did it occur to you to say that you have a girlfriend?!” You exclaimed in panic. He sighed and rolled his eyes.

“It was a mistake, okay? I really wanted to say “my girlfriends”, but I saw you in the chat, I thought about you and fuck up. I'm sorry,” Kayn apologized as he put the towel aside. "Just calm down."

“Calm down? There are Twitter threads where they describe how they are going to kidnap me so that you no longer have a girlfriend!” You screamed while you massage your temple to prevent a headache.

“You know how the internet is like, they're just exaggerating. You'll see that it will go away in a few days,” he tried another shot to calm you down.

“Kayn, I'm going back to school tomorrow. I'm not ready for this,” you explained your concern.

You already had problems communicating appropriately with your classmates because of how introverted you were. This was only going to make things worse. You didn't want Kayn's fame, you didn't want to be recognized, you just wanted to play video games and play guitar in the quietness of your room.

“Tomorrow, the crisis department will release an announcement where I officially say that I don't have a girlfriend and that's it, problem solved. You will have your normal life back,” Kayn explained in a calm voice.

"You promise?" You asked with a small voice.

“I promise,” Kayn responded. You could only let out a sigh that relieved your mind.

After a long video call with your boyfriend where you talked about the concert and his plans for when he returned home, you went to sleep with your head full of anxiety. The morning came too quickly. You got ready to go back to school and headed out. You decided to leave the official Heartsteel’s pins and keychains that Kayn had given you in your backpack so that people wouldn't suspect the change.

After some walking, you arrived at school and almost fainted when you saw the scene that was waiting for you. A gaggle of photographers was waiting patiently for you to show up at school. Now you not only have to anticipate your gossiping classmates, but also a bunch of reporters who care too much about the relationship of some teenagers,

You began to debate in your mind whether you should really attend on the first day. “If I enter, I will be bombarded with questions, and they are going to take many photos of me. If I don’t come in, they’re going to be more suspicious that I’m Kayn’s girlfriend.” You took too long to debate, so a paparazzo recognized you immediately.

“There she is!” He exclaimed as he ran towards you while taking photos of you. The others followed suit and quickly cornered you.

“Are you Kayn's girlfriend?!” “When did you start dating?!” “How big is he?!” It was the kind of questions that they bombed while they fired their flashes at you. You tried to cover your face from the cameras, but there were too many of them.

“No comment,” you repeated over and over again with a trembling voice while you were trying to get to the door of your school.

Not only did the paparazzi take photos of you, now your classmates were taking photos and recorded videos of what was happening. This was a nightmare. You wanted to wake up, but guess what? You were already wide awake. One way or another, you made it to the door. Two teachers kept the paparazzi away from you while you entered the building, leaving everything behind… or that's what you thought.

As soon as you stepped foot into the main building, all eyes were on you. You swallowed and just continued on your way to your living room. Several classmates from other classes approached you to ask you the same thing as the paparazzi. You avoided them as best you could, not being able to believe that everything was happening. Yesterday you were a normal girl with interaction problems, and now you were still a normal girl with interaction problems, but now you had a famous boyfriend.

You got to your classroom and everything got worse. Almost your entire class pounced on you to ask about your relationship with Kayn. You couldn’t resist it anymore. This was too much for you. Your body did the only thing your brain could think to do: run away.

Your legs were running as fast as possible to get to the music room. You went inside and locked yourself to prevent anyone else from entering. You threw yourself onto the bench there and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm your breathing. You received a text message and didn't hesitate to see who it was.

Rhaast: Have you arrived at school yet? Are you OK?

“Everything is your fault,” you thought out loud before turning off the phone to ignore the message, but you forgot that Kayn hates it when you leave him on read. Not even a minute passed by when he was already calling you.

“Hello?” You answered reluctantly as you continued to monitor your breathing.

“What happened? Why didn't you answer me?” He asked worriedly on the other end of the line.

“There are not only gossiping classmates. There are paparazzi outside the school.” You heard Kayn sigh in your ear.

“The airport was also full of them when I arrived this morning,” he said. “This is worse than I imagined. I'll pick you up.”

“No! If you come, everyone will think that we are dating,” you warned as you sat properly on the bench to pay attention to the conversation.

“You're right. I'll send someone for you to drive you to the studio. We must talk to the crisis department,” Kayn proposed. You accepted and hung up the call.

After being locked in the music room for half an hour, you saw through the window, hidden behind a curtain, that the paparazzi were still there. They were waiting for you like scavenger birds waiting for you to die so they could tear off your skin. After a while, a luxurious black car arrived and parked in front of the school. “That must be my ride,” you thought, relieved.

After receiving confirmation from Kayn that this car was your escape, you left the school and ran towards the car that was patiently waiting for you. The paparazzi caught up with you to take photos, but they didn't ask any questions. As you closed the door and asked the driver to drive off, you realized that you were not alone in the back seat. There was someone in a gray sweatshirt with the hood up, sunglasses, and a black cap. He was incognito, but what gave him away was that familiar cologne that you knew perfectly well.

"I told you not to come, you idiot!" You hit Kayn’s arm as he took off his costume as they left the paparazzi behind.

“I'm sorry! Is it a sin to make sure my girlfriend is okay?!” He exclaimed before grabbing your wrists to make you stop. You tried to move away from his body, but he wouldn't allow it. “Is this how you receive your handsome boyfriend after 2 months without seeing him?” He asked, offended.

“What are you doing here?” You asked him, tired of fighting.

“No one hurt you?” He ignored your question to inspect you from head to toe. Kayn missed seeing you in the adorable school uniform. He didn't like to wear it when he went to school, but it looked pretty good on you.

“No,” you answered in surrender.

“I missed you,” he whispered before pulling you closer to his lips.

Kissing Kayn was an indescribable experience. Having more years of practice than you, each kiss for you was better than the last one. The only bad thing is that Kayn is not one for simple, short kisses. He gives his all and this would be no exception. You could feel his passion, energy, and focus on you. His hands ran along the curvature of your waist to get more attached to you. Kayn might be the celebrity, but you were the star of the show.

His lips devoured you without remedy. He felt free and happy to have you in his arms again after months of abstinence. He liked to knead your body like he was a baker preparing dough. The softness of your lips and the warmth of your tongue provoked Kayn to want to spend the whole day kissing you.

He grabbed you by your thighs and forced you to get on his lap. His hands adapted to your butt to hold you against it. Kayn is like the tingling in your legs, the gasp that comes from a touch of static energy, or the cold in your mouth when you drink ice water after having a mint. He is the reaction to a radical change. He was rebellious, disastrous, and spontaneous. Kayn never had a plan, he likes to act on instinct. The beast inside him was in control when it came to that kind of thing. Kayn was ready to take off his clothes, but someone stopped him.

“We're here, Mr. Shieda.” The driver said dryly. Colors came to your face when you remembered that someone had been driving this entire time.

“Thank you, Kevin. Let me tip you,” Kayn cleared his throat to forget the awkward moment and took out his wallet.

Riot Records, the largest record label in the country. The reason your friends can't play cool music on their Twitch streams. Riot Records' headquarters were in the heart of the city. It was a modern and vibrant building, with contemporary design and creative spaces such as recording studios, composition areas and equipped offices. It also includes common spaces for socializing, meeting rooms and an art and design studio. The environment influences creativity, the relationships between artists and the process of music production and promotion.

Kayn led you to a conference room where there were two women. A sophisticated blonde in a suit who was in charge of the crisis department at Riot Records and a pink-haired girl, who looked familiar to you, who was in charge of the marketing department for Heartsteel. They sat face to face. You were very nervous and Kayn noticed it right away, so he took your hand lovingly.

“It's a pleasure to finally meet you. My name is Alune, I am Aphelios' sister,” The younger girl introduced herself with a friendly smile. You introduced yourself in the same way but with a weak smile due to your nervousness. "Well, since we already introduced ourselves, I'm afraid to tell you that you should break up." Alune gave them the bad news with a sad expression of being the messenger.

“What?!” You and Kayn exclaimed at the same time in shock, but then Alune laughed.

“You are so cute, obviously you don’t need to break up,” Alune said between laughs. They both relaxed upon hearing that she was just joking. "In fact, we need you to date a little more time together in the public eye."

“Why? Isn't it going to affect Heartsteel’s popularity?” You asked confused.

“Yes and no. It's true that we will lose a few fans, but it's a small investment we're willing to make,” the blonde explained with great precision and elegance.

“Really?” Kayn asked, just as confused as his girlfriend.

“Yes, the fact that you have accepted that you have a girlfriend now is the best thing that could have happened to Heartsteel. Alune opened her laptop, revealing a PowerPoint presentation about what they would talk about at the meeting.

This was the situation. Heartsteel was about to release a new single on February 15, after Valentine's Day, which will be titled: Heartbreaker. The Marketing department's plan is to take advantage of the current relationship of the most rebellious member of Heartsteel with his girlfriend, who came out of nowhere to promote it in the long run.

The plan was as follows: Step 1. Spread the tea of the relationship with the help of the paparazzi. Step 2. Send them on a date from Riot Records on Valentine's Day in a public place. Step 3. Pretend to break up in said public place, creating a total spectacle in front of the cameras and making it obvious that you were over. Step 4: Kayn announces on social media that Heartsteel will release a heartbreak song, hinting that it is about his ex. They were willing to lose some fans in the month that their public relationship lasted because they knew that they would get them back as soon as they break up.

“What do you think? Brilliant, right?” Alune asked after finishing her presentation.

“I don't know…” you commented while you were playing with your fingers as you thought at the situation

If you decided to do all of that, it would mean having to give up your precious privacy for a while. You wanted to do everything you could to help Kayn, but you didn't know if it was the right way to do it. Your boyfriend squeezed your hand gently to get your attention.

"It's okay if you refuse," Kayn whispered to you.

"I'm just scared, that's all…" you confessed, insecure.

“This is a foolproof plan. Many celebrity relationships are like this. They have fake relationships that help the two celebrities become better known,” the blonde explained with a wise air.

“Everything will be fine, you will do well. Valentine's Day will be in a month. You will return to your private life soon,” Kayn assured you as his thumb stroked the torso of your hand softly.

“Also, you can take advantage of this month to go out as much as you want. The more you guys go out, the better. You can go grab some coffee, go to the movies, maybe a motel…” Alune hinted, but the blonde nudged her to keep her quiet.

You smiled at that. The couple exchanged a knowing look at the idea. “Well, it wouldn't hurt to have a month of normal dating without repercussions,” you thought. If you were going to have to live your life in the public eye for a while anyway, what's better than to make the most of it?

“That sounds good.” You agreed to participate in this advertising stunt.

Kayn and you hang out together the entire month, like lovey doves in their nest. Kayn picked you up at school almost every day. His extravagant car caught the attention of your classmates and killed your friend with envy. He always kissed you, opened the door for you, and took you to eat at your favorite restaurants.

The paparazzi did all the work of announcing to the world that Kayn did have a girlfriend, and it was you. The Internet was filled with photos of you kissing in different places, walking down the street hand in hand, trying to avoid cameras, and sharing desserts in public. It was strange to see yourself on Twitter Trends. You enjoyed spending time with Kayn, but every date meant sacrificing a part of yourself for the entertainment of the public eye. The only thing that allowed you to kiss Kayn in broad daylight with paparazzi hovering around you was that it was one of the few ways you could support his career.

Valentine's Day was quickly approaching. Alune planned the last date. Kayn would pick you up, take you to a fancy restaurant, fight over dessert, and then you would throw the cake they ordered in his face. You wouldn't know if you could do it, but you had to try to do your best. You were not a person who gets angry easily, so you were afraid of not knowing how to act accordingly.

Alune sent you a red dress with pearl accessories. They looked expensive, so you were very careful not to ruin them. Watched some tutorials on YouTube to do your hair and makeup. It took you all morning to prepare, but you managed to highlight your best version. At dinner time, Kayn picked you up as always.

“Hi gorgeous. I hadn't seen you around here before, what's your name?” He asked you as he looked at you from head to toe, pretending you were another girl. You blushed as he took your hand to kiss your knuckles.

“I thought you had a girlfriend,” you played along.

“Yes, I have a girlfriend and I respect her a lot,” he responded with a playful smile as he pulled you closer by the waist.

“If you respected her, you wouldn't be flirting with me,” you frowned.

“Believe me, I respect her so much that I will do everything to you that I can't do to her, beautiful,” he purred into your ear before placing a kiss on your cheek.

You were shocked at his response. You didn't have anything clever you could top it off with. Kayn moved down to your neck to kiss it and gently nibble on your skin. Your body reacted to the tickling. Your boyfriend smiled as he saw you smile at the feeling.

“You always look beautiful, but today you are showing it off,” Kayn said with a smile plastered on his face.

Kayn drove without discretion, as always, while you watched the landscape pass in front of you. The nerves were consuming you inside, but you pretended everything was fine as you hummed some songs Kayn had on his playlist. You were happy and sad that this would be his last date in the public eye. He quickly noticed that you seemed to be a bit upset.

“Is something wrong?” he asked you, holding my thigh with his right hand while maneuvering the steering wheel with his left hand.

“I'm nervous. I don't know if I can do it,” you said before sighing in an attempt to relax.

“It will be like a normal date. Only this time, instead of saying goodbye with kisses, it will be with a bang. It will be fun!” Kayn explained, trying to cheer you up.

"I don't want to end our date with a bang,” you whined.

“C’mon! How many times have you threatened my mom for sucking at League?” He asked.

“But that's different. It's in the privacy of my room, no one can see me there,” you responded.

"Just think about all the times I've made you angry, and you'll see that the madness will come out on its own," Kayn said before patting your head.

You rolled your eyes and returned your gaze to the window. Kayn made it sound so simple, but it was because he was already used to that lifestyle. You wished you could adapt like him. Be as outgoing as him. That you didn't care about anything like him. But you weren't him, you were just you, and that's okay. You would get out of this your way, for your sake and Kayn's.

As soon as you arrived at the restaurant that the marketing department had chosen for you, the fierce pack of gossip-hungry paparazzi surrounded you mercilessly. Kayn completely ignored them and took you out of the car like a true gentleman. The reporters shouted questions that you couldn’t understand among all the noise. They were both instructed not to say anything, so that’s what they did.

The restaurant was illuminated by soft golden light that reflected off the ivory walls and crystal chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. The tables were elegantly dressed with white tablecloths and covered with delicate china and sparkling crystal stemware. The soft hum of live music filled the air, complementing the lively conversation of the diners.

The date started well. They talked about their future plans, drank luxurious drinks, and the appetizer was delicious. If it weren't for the paparazzi and the publicity stunt, this would have been the best date in the world. They had started well, but they knew it would end very badly. Anxiety-filled thoughts invaded your mind again. You tried to push them away to enjoy the good things of the date, but time was passing, and you had to ruin it soon.

During the conversation, Kayn noticed that you remained somewhat distant. He reached for your hand that was subtly resting on the table to get your attention. You snapped out of your thoughts to focus on him. I smile at you and ask you how much you were thinking about.

"I was just thinking how sad it is that we're going to break up on our first Valentine's Day together," you whispered so only he could hear you.

“There will be more in the future. I promise. For now, let's focus on fixing this situation,” he said before kissing your knuckles with delight.

Since this was an Italian restaurant, they both ordered two different types of pasta that they decided to share. Kayn was trying to distract you with the pleasant conversation and caresses under the table so that you would stop thinking about the inevitable that was about to happen.

After finishing eating, the inevitable happened: the dessert they didn't order arrived at their table. It was a small cake for two decorated with strawberries and lots of cream, the perfect cake to make a mess of. You felt something brush against your legs. You looked under the tablecloth, it was a note from Kayn on a napkin. “Scold me for pretending to go on a date with another girl to make you jealous. I deserve the punishment,” you read in your mind.

You still remembered it. The reason you almost gave up on confessing to Kayn at the time. Since you thought about it, you never scold him about it. You were so happy that he was yours that you forgot to be upset with him.

“Who is Rachel?” You asked him. Starting with the performance.

“A friend,” he answered without further ado.

“Don’t lie to me! Do you think I am stupid?!” You exclaimed as you slammed the table so that all the other diners could see it.

The audience watched the scene carefully, some were recording it and others wondered where the employees were to pick them apart in case things escalated. What they didn't know is that Alune had paid the restaurant to let them do their little scene without interruptions. You were drawing out anger from a deep place in your stomach that you didn't even know existed. Kayn's eyes widened. He didn't expect you to get violent.

“What the hell is wrong with you?! You are crazy!” Kayn screamed with a frown.

“Kayn Shieda! Did you sleep with her, yes or no?!” You shouted so everyone could hear their conversation.

“She is just a friend…” he said while rubbing his temple to avoid a migraine.

"Yes or no, asshole?!" You exclaimed as if you were playing League with your friends in the privacy of your room. Kayn remained silent, he did not know what to answer. By this point, the other diners were wondering what was going on. You leaned back in the chair and pretended to cry. "Is she better than me?" You whispered between fake sobs.

"Hey, if I tell you the truth, you won’t get angry?" Kayn asked quietly. You nodded as you wiped away your non-existent tears. “Yes, I slept with her, but it was only once!” he confessed with shame.

The diners gasped in surprise in unison at the great revelation. You smiled weakly. You couldn't believe you were doing what you were going to do. You took the strawberry and cream cake and smashed it on his face. The cream shot everywhere, and you ruined your boyfriend's thin black shirt.

"Fuck you, Kayn! Lose my number! We are so done!” You exclaimed hysterically.

You ran away from the restaurant. The paparazzi rushed at you again to explain what had just happened. The only response you gave them was the middle finger. You hoped you wouldn't have to deal with them again for a long time. You got into the “taxi” that Alune had sent so that you could escape from there and return home safely.

A satisfying smile appeared on your face. Finally, everything was about to end soon. You would return to your normal life and Kayn will be able to continue feeding his fans' bad boy illusion. Your cell phone was ringing like crazy from messages from your friends, who had also inevitably found out that you were dating Kayn, asking how you were doing. You turned off your phone to recharge your social battery. Tomorrow, you would tell them everything.

When the driver turned onto the wrong street, you started to worry. You approached his seat to find out where exactly he was taking you, but he only said that he was following Kayn's orders. You didn't want to doubt his work, and you returned to your seat.

"Kayn told you to bring me to school?" You asked confused.

"Yes, he told me you would know where to go," he answered kindly.

“Thank you, Kevin. Have a good night,” you said goodbye as you got out of the vehicle.

Your heels clicked against the clean floor of the empty hallways. The front door was open, so you had no problem getting in. You felt strange being the only person there during the night. You were like a ghost in pain, wandering around the place until you reached your favorite destination. You were surprised to see a light on in the music room. You opened the door.

“Happy Valentine's Day, beautiful,” Kayn congratulated you with a large bouquet of red roses.

You blushed at the unexpected surprise. You gladly received the beautiful flowers and admired the place. It still looked like the music room, the only difference was that now there was a table with candles and a plate with your favorite sweets. It was intimate, private and romantic. It was better than the date at the restaurant. This was the best date in the world.

“How did you get here before me? When did you plan this?” You asked, not being able to believe the effort he had made for you.

“I ran off like four traffic lights to get here so I could change,” Kayn responded as he guided you to the table to sit down. He pulled out the chair for your comfort and, once seated, gently pushed you towards the table. “I had planned to do something else for Valentine's Day, but my big mouth ruined everything. Although, I wasn't going to let myself ruin another important thing for both of us, so I thought about this,” he explained as he sat down at the table.

“You're crazy,” you joked.

“Crazy for you,” he took the matter seriously.

Kayn looked deep into your eyes. He wanted to make sure you understood that he would do anything for you and that there was no one like you. You were his world, his muse, his girl and his greatest desire. They didn't need words to express their feelings for each other in a moment of complicity and infinite love.

Even though there were delicious sweets on the table, Kayn only wanted your sweet lips against his. He kept you close to his body, his hands molded to your cheeks so you wouldn't run away, and his fragrance intoxicated your nose. You couldn't imagine yourself with anyone else but him, and your kisses made it clear to him.

“I love you,” Kayn whispered between kisses.

“I love you too,” you smiled against his lips.

---

Masterlist.

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ginsengkitten · 1 year ago

Text

༺ Beautiful Dangerous ༻

༺☆༻

Chapter Twelve

A New Life

"Y/N Monologue"

"If I knew the way the world was, what it would really be like- once I left that hospital and walked out into that rainy night in the west parking lot to meet the mystery writer who came to my rescue, had I known, I don't know if I really would have left so quickly.”

That night, a plain clothed Sister Graham had come to your rescue. In a heartbeat, you jumped in and the two of you took off. It was a thrill to the both of you, to leave that place. She had explained how she was forcefully retired due to her lack of “passion”. She explained that she would like to go see her sister back west and thought to smuggle you along with her. The two of you prowling the states in her shotty volvo. It was until one night in a motel that the plans had suddenly made a drastic change.

You lied on the sheets of the creaky floral bed, the half busted television illuminating the dark motel room. The Saturday night MTV broadcast was running as usual, it had been months since you last watched television. Hoping to catch something of substance before hitting the road again in the early morning. It was around 9pm when a familiar tune echoed out from the Tv that made your ears perk up. Words for a music video titling on the screen. It was a playback recording of a Guns n Roses concert from the week prior! You grappled your way to the edge of the bed, face at full attention to the screen now. Wow this is them just a week ago performing at a venue in LA. This performance began and seemed almost more polished than the ones you were used to. It became apparent that some sort of creative direction was being applied here. Pyrotechnics burst out behind the band. Carefully curated recording angles for dramatic effect- and - a plethora of scantily clad women sprinkled along the stage itself. Intertwining their bodies with the band and the rhythm. It seemed so….strange. Your fight for a glimpse of Slash was apprehended with a sour sight that suddenly turned your blood cold but your face red hot. A beautiful bombshell swayed herself around Slash as he played out in total enjoyment. Her long nails, soothed over his body as he performed on stage. An unfamiliar smile of greedy drunken stupor washed over his face. His enjoyment of this. This- orgy like display. The way he responded to her touch was organic and seemingly so- real? He seemed happy. So happy and so alive. Energy flowing through his fingertips and the strings as the woman lustered her self practically into his body it seemed. Her own devious grin of enjoyment too. You had seen enough. You shut the Tv off and scrambled back onto the edge of the bed in shock and disgust. This was merely a week old. Look at him. Happy, thriving.

The idea that you belonged in his picture became idiotic in this moment. The familiar echo of betrayal made its way back into your heart. Nausea waved over you as you stunned. All of this, all of this love, pain, yearning, sorrow- for what? For him to be the happiest he’s ever been? For him to be crawling with beautiful women? For him to be on MTV? What reason could he have to want you in this perfect new life he has found? His beautiful face flashed into your mind with a sting. Just as quickly, your own reflection blurring into view in the mirror on the wall beside you. Look at yourself, you thought.Tears had gone past welled and altogether escaped your eyes. You wanted to cry, really you did, but they just didn’t fall this time. You were so exhausted. Defeated. Alone.

It was in the same breath that fury engulfed your every cell. Forcing you to hurriedly pack what items you had with you and dart from the motel before Sister Graham could exit her shower. Broken inside, all you wanted now was to escape everything. Every piece of that girl that lived that life. And the life before it. You wanted nothing to do with any of it anymore.

The neon motel sign showered a hazey glow onto the dark street. A familiarity impressed you with the neon lights. As they always had. Just like the glittering signs up and down sunset. After reaching a small Main Street, you left your run now down to a slow waltz in the dark. Unsure of where to turn next exactly. A thumb stuck out along the lonely highway in the late evening hours. An hour stringing by without a single bite until an unsuspecting pickup truck rolled up along side the curb. With a window rolled down, you met your gaze with a beautiful, stunning woman. A glamorous sight, the most well tailored lady with an extravagant updo and glitter lined eyes. She eyed you precariously.

“Honey you better have a death wish standin out here in the night like this. Ain’t your daddy ever teach you stranger danger? You must be out a your damn mind girl.” The woman scorned sweetly. Her voice was deep and warm.

You stared blankly.

“Where you heading anyways baby?” She asked in a motherly and comforting voice, as if she’d raised you herself.

“I’m not really sure honestly….away from here?” You shrug at the ground.

Another figure ducks forward from the passenger seat. An equally beautiful woman pokes her head over examining you through her cigarette. “We got places to be child, you gettin in or what?” She grumbled in a less friendly manner. Her voice also a warm but deep tone. The first woman rolled her eyes at this remark. “Ignore her. Come with us.” She kindly motioned her head to the backseat.

“You damn lucky we was driving here girl, could have got your stupid ass chopped up like liver out here!” The second woman joked in a lighter, less mean, manner as the truck rumbled down the road. The cab smelled of sweet perfume and somehow, a feeling of uncertainty, but safety, befell you, and you knew wherever you went next, you vowed to leave the old you behind. Here in this town, on this curb, on this highway. A grave of who You once were settled to rest as you drove towards your new life.

#NOT the ending btw #gnr #slash #slash gnr #saul hudson #slash fanfiction #slash x reader #gnr smut #gnr x reader #saul hudson x reader #slash smut

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biconickyoshi · 1 year ago

Note

Hi! The Zukaang prophecy dream person here. What you said about a lot of people not even considering Aang and Zuko as a ship made me think. Following that thought, I fell down a rabbit hole that turned into something a lot deeper than just shipping discourse. I'm not a professional psychologist or anything, but I hope some of my insight on this topic is interesting. I apologise in advance for so many words to read!

As a kid I remember being very clueless about romance. I never really interpreted Aang's affection towards Katara as romantic at all, and I honestly have no idea why, since they literally kissed on screen multiple times. So that's why, for years, I remember trying to find a ship that I would like, yet nothing seemed to click just right. That is until the Avatar Renaissance of 2020 when a lot of new people joined the fandom, and a flood of new discussions arose, way different than it used to be years ago. It made me realize that the core of the issue lies in Aang himself. At least that's my own theory, feel free to disagree. A lot of popular avatar ships include everyone from the main cast, but rarely ever Aang himself, apart from the canon Kataang. In all aspects, Aang is an unconventional protagonist, one unheard of at the time. He is a monk, he is a pacifist, he is a vegetarian. For an average kid or teenager in 2005, I don't think much of these aspects are too relatable. We were and still are used to seeing agressive, determined teenage protagonists, ready to beat up the bad guy at any opportunity. That's what was considered "cool". So a bald 12 year old boy with an arrow on his head who grew up in a temple, surrounded by monks, who avoids hurting people, even those who wiped out his entire nation, is simply foreign. You often hear arguments against Kataang: he is too young for her, she sees him as a little brother, they simply don't fit. Those are all false statements, as rewatching the show without bias you can clearly see them love each other deeply and mutually. Aang is a child, but he is a person too, someone with his own values and principles, and so is Katara. To me, both of them are deserving of love, Aang is deserving of Katara's love.

I am now going to talk about the genocide of the air nomads, as I think I can provide a unique perspective on this. I am Ukrainian. The russian invasion of my country has been going for 10 years now, but two years ago specifically my whole world turned upside down when russia launched a full scale invasion, intending to conquer all of Ukraine. A lot of my beliefs of how the world worked changed drastically. Seeing myself from years ago in people from around the world, not yet knowing war, I think this is something you have to experience yourself to truly understand what it means for another nation to want yours erased from existence. Aang's entire nation is gone. Everyone. No one is alive, not a single person. I don't think many people truly let that sink in. He has to keep going every day with the knowledge that the world he is in doesn't have a place for his nation anymore. He has nowhere to go and no one to come to. He has the gaang, and that's wonderful, but it's not the same. He is the only person in the entire world who truly bears this pain. To me, imagining that for myself, is an indescribable horror. To imagine having no place to come back to, living among strangers who know nothing of you and your people. Yes, he has the temples that preseve history, but how much of them has been destroyed? Even the people at the Northern air temple, although fleeing a disaster, still contributed to the destruction and loss of that history.

Yet, bearing this unimaginative hurt, Aang is able to forgive. He is able to make peace with his loss, and let go of his feelings of rage. He wants to see good in the Fire nation people. And through that, he is the only one who can truly see Zuko as he is. Having let go of anger and hurt, he can see the genuine wish Zuko has for atoning for his family's sins. He can literally see through him, all his feelings and thoughts, like no one else. He holds no grudge, no hatered for him. If you ever have a war, genocide unleashed on your country, you would know how impossible it is to forgive. Yet, Aang, as the avatar, has no choice but to do just that, to let go. I think that alone makes Aang one of the strongest people in the avatar universe.

But how is this relevant to the Aang ships being dismissed? Circling back, to me, this is a matter of understanding. People resonate with Katara for her experience as a younger sister, thrown into the role of a mother figure, for her experience as a teenage girl in a sexist world, someone with a desire to become stronger despite being denied that opportunity, be it by the circumstances or by someone stronger than her deeming her "unworthy". People resonate with Sokka for his struggle to become a reliable leader, for his insecurity being the only one without a special "talent" (aka bending). Toph for her sheltered upbringing and parents that are unwilling to see her as more than just her disability. Zuko for his struggle with his identity, his own values versus those forced upon him, an abusive household, repressed emotions and anger, being a sibling of someone way more naturally talented, coming to terms with the hurt he has caused and atoning for it. But what can people find in Aang that resonates with them? All of what Aang is, is grand and bigger than yourself. I relate to Aang as someone whose nation is being subjected to genocide, but is that a common experience? I'm sure that nowadays a lot more people came to appreciate Aang's character more, but as a child in the 2000s, would you really say you saw yourself in Aang as much as you saw yourself in Sokka, Katara, Toph or Zuko?

In conclusion, my theory is that, because of how unique Aang has been written, that prevents people from seeing him as someone they could imagine in a relationship with someone else. After all, how can you write about someone you don't share many life experiences with? How do you write them in love? How do you make someone so different from you come to life?

Anyway, thanks a lot for reading all of my brain vomit. Avatar is truly a goldmine for character analysis and study. Would really love to hear what you think!

I absolutely loved reading your analysis on Aang's character, anon. I agree wholeheartedly with everything you've brought up here. I think it's so true that many people (whether they're conscious of it or not) view Aang through a certain lens due to how unconventional of a protagonist and person he is. To many, he's not "supposed" to be the one who "gets the girl". He's not your stereotypical handsome/buff/rugged teenage boy protagonist; he's small, kind, goofy, and pacifistic. And I think in general that people find it difficult to wrap their heads around a male character like Aang not conforming to Western and/or patriarchal society's expectations/conventions when it comes to behavior and overall physical appearance. I think this also results in a lot of people unconsciously infantilizing Aang and having a hard time viewing him in a shippable way.

It's also interesting that you brought up Aang's almost "otherness" when it comes to the world he finds himself in when he awakens from the iceberg - he is the last one of his kind in a world where nobody remembers his people. He's from a culture that is vastly different from the ones that remain in the world. His philosophy, mannerisms, gender expression, appearance, etc. are all completely unique, not only canonically in the post-genocide AtLA world, but in our world as well, especially in the West.

The fact that despite everything Aang has been through, despite all the atrocities he has witnessed, he still is able to remain true to himself at his core through to the very end is so moving to me. Aang will always be my favorite character all time simply because of who he is. Even as a kid, I loved him so much - I never had a crush on Zuko or Sokka, it was always Aang. He represented not only the type of person I would want to be, but also the type of person I would want to be with. And sure, he's not perfect, but that's another one of the many things I love about him - he's human, he makes mistakes.

I feel like I could say more, but you already wrote so much good stuff in your analysis, and I'm not sure if there's much I could add haha.

Also, thank you for sharing your perspective as someone who lives in Ukraine - I can't imagine how difficult it must be to be dealing with all of Russia's BS the past decade, and especially recently. I sincerely hope you're staying safe and healthy! <3

#asks #zukaang #atla #atla meta #zuko #aang #the gaang #avatar the last airbender #aanglove

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