#and i read my book so i didn't spend all day on the internet so that's good too
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ntll · 11 months ago
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i spent most of the day in bed and i'm kind of annoyed at myself because there was no need for it, it's just such a strong habit after a decade+ of hiding in my room that i feel compelled to go back to bed a lot and today i caved. :\ but whatever, tomorrow is a new day.
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aeide-thea · 2 years ago
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like, okay, to walk my own talk and do a little fact-checking—here’s a review of hari’s book stolen focus by uk psychologist and academic stuart ritchie, with whom i strongly suspect i've got some political bones to pick, published on unherd, a platform with which i know i’ve got some political bones to pick (tl;dr transphobia ahoy!), but ritchie’s approach and analysis here seem pretty reasonable:
[T]he phenomenon Hari addresses — the feeling that, with so many distractions around in the modern, online-centric world, it’s harder than ever to focus — is one many of us experience. Hari says that he and almost everyone around him feels this way, and describes a several-months-long “digital detox”, where he went to live in a small town on Cape Cod with no smartphone and no internet.
But that’s all anecdotal: does Hari actually present any evidence that shortening attention spans is a society-wide problem? […] It’s not until more than halfway through the book, page 176, that Hari drops what should be a bombshell: “We don’t have any long-term studies tracking changes in people’s ability to focus over time.” In other words, he quietly admits that there isn’t really any strong scientific evidence for the main thesis of the book.
more specifics are under the cut, for anyone who doesn’t feel like giving unherd more traffic (i’m right there with you!), but i do want to highlight the conclusion of the article, which is cutting but seems essentially correct to me:
[T]his is a writer who’s shown himself again and again to be either untrustworthy, unoriginal, or uninformed. If he’s right to say that our moments of focus are becoming ever-more precious, isn’t it time we started paying attention to someone — anyone — else?
and the further pullquotes i promised above:
Most of the book is dedicated to the causes of our collective attentional problems. The first is, unoriginally, social media. Isn’t it very revealing, Hari writes, that there’s no button on Facebook that you can press to help you meet up with your friends in person? Facebook won’t, he says, “alert you to the physical proximity of somebody you might want to see in the real world”. Hari explains that the whole business model of social media precludes the encouragement of joys like looking your friends in the eye or giving them a hug, and instead is based on keeping you fixated on your screen, scrolling endlessly, never leaving the house.
Except Facebook does have exactly the feature that Hari claims doesn’t (and couldn’t) exist. It’s called “Nearby Friends”. It gives you a little map of where your friends are physically at that moment (if they have opted in). It’s been available since 2014. A two-second Google search would have enlightened Hari. Maybe he wrote that part of the book while he was in internet-free isolation.
[…]
[M]any of the other causes Hari identifies are rehashings of previous pop-science and pop-psychology books: we aren’t sleeping enough (Why We Sleep); kids don’t play outdoors any more (Free Range Kids and The Coddling of the American Mind); we don’t eat the right foods (a million diet books). Of course, it’s not a crime to write a book that doesn’t provide any new information. But Hari’s irritating, breathless style turns every single fact he “discovers” into a startling revelation, every single expert he speaks to into the absolute best in the world. Hari’s research — a series of interviews for a pop-psychology book — becomes an intense, globetrotting journey of personal discovery. His mind is so often blown that it’s little wonder it has such difficulty in paying attention.
It’s not just that Hari thinks he’s discovered earth-shaking new information. (As Dean Burnett wrote of Lost Connections, Hari “repeatedly presents well-known concepts and ideas … as fringe concepts that he’s discovered through his own efforts”.) He also thinks he’s a hard-nosed scientific truth-seeker. At the start of the book, he solemnly assures us that: “I studied social and political sciences at Cambridge University, where I got a rigorous training in how to read the studies these scientists publish [and] how to assess the evidence they put forward”.
What makes this risible isn’t just that he’s touting his undergraduate degree as if it makes him an expert (a fairly substantial proportion of the population also have one). It’s that Stolen Focus exhibits no talent for assessing evidence. A few times there’s a small concession to a flaw in a study, or to the fact that scientists disagree on a point — but Hari fails to add any of the necessary uncertainty to his argument. After a cursory mention of the “other side,” he usually just blunders on regardless, assuming his argument is right.
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Your attention didn’t collapse. It was stolen by Johann Hari
#johann hari#stuart ritchie#attention span#anyway as i said before i get that we all FEEL more distractible#and i'm inclined to think that's true to some extent—certainly the more i read short-form tumblr posts#instead of longer-form articles or books#the less practice i'm getting at engaging with longer-form narratives#in much the same way that a great deal of close reading has made my eyes physically worse at focusing farther away#but like—i've always wanted constant stimulus.#when i was growing up i had my nose constantly in a book‚ even when i was walking down the street.#these days i scroll through my phone. it's the same impulse.#if i didn't have internet access i'm quite certain i'd shift back to the patterns i grew up with.#maybe those were better; maybe it's value-neutral.#i'm not convinced the golden age of long attention span was as real as people make out—some of us had adhd before we had internet!#i think people have always sought diversion—it used to be that you'd see people on the subway with their noses in newspapers#and i think that frankly the panic about attention span gets too general#in the sense that like—if something compelling is in front of me‚ i'll engage with it.#i can spend hours talking to a friend on the phone‚ or out riding my bike.#so really i think it's a question of like—in what areas do we find ourselves struggling with attention?#and then what are we doing to address that?#i do think that specifically my desire to engage with new long-form writing is lower than it was when i was a child#but i think that's a product of (a) having other things to read that take less activation energy#and (b) not being in e.g. english classes that are asking me to read non-genre fiction#which was‚ if i'm being honest‚ the impetus for most of my ~literary~ reading growing up#so like. i could join a book club. i could take a book to a coffee shop and leave my phone at home.#there are specific actions i could take to address this specific issue instead of just engaging in generalized overblown despair#but like. that isn't a Sexy Unified Theory. that doesn't sell or go viral.#but like. clearly i continue to be capable of focusing in on things like—the many words i've assembled in this post and its tags!#so i just think like. we need to define the scope of the issue better‚ and once we get specific‚ solutions start to present themselves.#but we have to believe that we're capable. which we're less likely to believe‚ if we're reading books about how Big Tech Fucked Us Up!
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emphistic · 2 months ago
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MEDDLE ABOUT
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SYN. Being co-stars with your ex-boyfriend of three months is basically hell; or at least, that's what you think. AKA: Sukuna wants you back, whether he's acting or not.
TAGS. actor AU, fem!Reader, mean!Sukuna, exes to lovers, forced proximity, sharing a cigarette, smoking, arguing, eventual smut, Sukuna likes to shut you up with his dick, cockwarming, answering the phone during séx, orgasm denial, dacryphilia, porn w/o plot, use of pet names: baby, sweetheart, pretty girl, my dear (mockingly)
WC. 5.4k (please read anyway 😞)
AN. requested by anon (you didn't specify any genre, so i just freestyled 🤷‍♀️), animated dividers by @/cafekitsune; i'm a sucker for actor AUs; available on ao3; MDNI
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“I know you wanna kiss me,” you smiled, leaning closer to Sukuna’s face. Your noses were barely apart, and you couldn’t tell where his breath ended, and where yours started. To be honest, this was far more intimate than any other kiss scene you ever had to film.
“Yeah?” Sukuna grinned, getting equally as close. “And what’re you going to do about that, pretty girl?”
“. . .Fucking slap you, that’s what.” 
“CUT!” The director yelled, groaning in exasperation. “C’mon, people. I know it’s been a long day, but put your differences aside for the sake of one movie, will ya? When you receive your paycheck, you’ll regret all of this ‘huffing and puffing’ you two are both doing right now.”
You exhaled, pulling away from Sukuna. It’s not that you couldn’t remember your correct lines, it’s just. . . You couldn’t take it anymore. Being in the same room as him, breathing in the same air as him, starring in the same movie with him. Fuck, you hated this.
You and Sukuna had broken up exactly three months ago despite having what seemed like a pretty healthy relationship. Seemed is the key word.
Of course, you two had your ups and downs, like an ordinary couple, but what differentiated you two from a normal couple was the fact that you guys both juggled busy careers as an actor and actress. Being booked with interviews, PR stunts, and in general, movies, you and Sukuna didn’t have the ability to spend much time together. And, as if that wasn’t enough, there was constantly a multitude of women on his arm during movie premieres. Yeah, you knew those were all for PR, but still, it hurt to see your boyfriend standing with a woman that wasn’t you every day.
At first, you thought you could take it. Being an actress yourself, you had your fair share of rumors and made up scandals. But it came to a point where you couldn’t take it anymore. You and Sukuna broke up, consequently, and fans immediately voiced their opinions and concerns, bombarding Twitter with trending tags, and posting videos on several apps. The internet had been obsessed with you guys as a couple since the first movie you two co-starred in—which was years ago—so their complaints definitely weren’t for naught.
Originally, you thought that your relationship with Sukuna would end on good terms, but boy, oh boy, were you wrong. Sukuna, just mere days after your breakup, was spotted by paparazzi walking around the city with his arm around a girl you definitely did not recognize as one of his current co-stars. And to make matters worse, he had the audacity to hit you up and ask if he could come over to your penthouse right after.
Men, am I right?
You two may or may not have slept together as exes a few times after your inevitable argument about him and that new girl, but rest assured, you did eventually break things off permanently. Well, you thought you did. As if by fate, you and Sukuna were casted as co-stars in an up-and-coming romance movie that had your fans just dying in anticipation of finally being able to see their favorite (broken up) couple together on screen again.
To be frank, you were originally going to pass up the role as the female lead—seeing as your luck had landed you as co-stars with Sukuna—but your manager apparently really, really wanted you to work on the film, saying things like Think of how elated your fans will be and It’s an adaptation from a book that made millions and Just imagine all of the PR and promoting you could do. It took a while of convincing—and coercing—to get you to finally agree to the role since, after all, PR was the main reason for your and Sukuna’s breakup. But, honestly, you would be lying if you said there weren’t any feelings left for your ex-boyfriend, Sukuna.
“I think we should all take a breather,” Sukuna began, jeering, “before someone gets all hot and bothered by just being on the same set as me. Wouldn’t you agree?” Sukuna turned to you, an expression on his face that just made you want to punch him in the nose.
“‘Hot and bothered’, seriously? Don’t make me laugh.” You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest.
Sukuna tilted his head to the side, grinning. “Do you think I’m joking? I could feel the way your heart was racing earlier, when we had to shoot that hugging in the rain scene. Just admit it, this isn’t acting for you.”
He was definitely self-projecting, you scowled just by the thought of it.
“Oh, don’t give me that look, sweetheart. We all know how you really feel,” Sukuna teased, leaning down to your eye-level. His breath fanned your reddening ear as he whispered, “You want me so bad it makes you look fucking stupid.”
And when he pulled away, Sukuna added one last remark, “I know it’s been a long three months for you. Say, how’s that blondie treating you, hm? I bet his dick is as small as his future in acting.”
“Ryomen, just stop.” You shook your head. “It’s not like that with him, and you know that. Just leave me alone.”
You shoved at his chest as you walked off set, your assistants following you promptly with water bottles and towels.
In all honesty, you remembered it like it happened yesterday. Before you and Sukuna became boyfriend and girlfriend, your first meeting was in a movie that you both starred in as the female and male lead. It was a romance movie, of course, that was about a couple meeting on an island while both on individual vacations. You two spent most of your days on set in swimsuits and bikinis, consuming fake alcoholic beverages, and, consequently, sleeping together—after the tension just grew unbearable.
On and off camera, Sukuna had been growing an attraction towards you. I mean, who could blame him? You two had to be near each other while being basically half-naked. And, if your pretty face wasn’t enough to beguile Sukuna, your ass definitely was. From the moment he shook hands with you at your first meeting as co-stars, he knew he had to have you—acting or not.
That movie was the start of the skyrocketing of both your and Sukuna’s career in acting. Fans quickly noted how much chemistry the two of you had together, and how well you two could act out emotions and intimate scenes. What the audience didn’t know, though, was that you and Sukuna had started seeing each other a few weeks after shooting together.
Sukuna had invited over the whole cast and team for drinks after a successful movie premiere, and you two ended up talking and conversing in his kitchen whilst a little under the influence. You two hit it off, and learned that being an aspiring actor wasn’t the only thing you two had in common. One glass turned into two, and two turned into stumbling into Sukuna’s bedroom after everyone had responsibly ordered a cab home.
Waking up the morning after, and deciding it wasn’t just going to be a one night stand, you and Sukuna thus began your new relationship. At first, you two avoided being spotted in public together, but it came to a point where your relationship just couldn’t be hidden anymore and you both decided to go public. The internet responded almost immediately with cheers, enthusiasm, and occasionally, expressions showing how un-surprised they were. I mean, you two had been shipped together almost constantly; making it official was almost expected. 
Years passed, the honeymoon stage was over, your careers were more demanding and busy than they had ever been, and, well, you know the rest.
“Fancy seeing you here.” 
A grimace immediately made its way onto your face at the sound of Sukuna’s voice calling out to you from behind. 
“Hilarious,” you deadpanned, turning to face Sukuna as he sat down beside you and slung an arm around the back of the couch, “I was hoping the next time I saw you would be at your funeral.”
“A little harsh, don’t you think?” chided Sukuna, as he brought out a cigarette and lit it.
You crossed your arms over your chest, leaning back against the couch. “What do you want?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Sukuna leaned his face closer to yours, his eyes running down your face and naturally drifting to your lips.
“Unless you’re being your usual asshole-self, and here to annoy me in my dressing room, I’m afraid not.”
After you stormed off set, the director decided it was best to just call it a day and continue filming tomorrow. You went outside for a bit to get some fresh air, before deciding to return to your dressing room and get unready. Stripping down and putting on nothing but your robe, you had sat yourself down on the couch and picked up a magazine, planning on spending a few minutes relaxing before making your way home. Sukuna barging in, despite being off the clock, was something you definitely weren’t expecting. He wasn’t supposed to be here, and if someone found out. . .
“You’ll be in a lot of trouble if my makeup artist comes in here and sees you,” you commented. “Go smoke somewhere else.”
At this, Sukuna’s eyes flickered up to your own, and he removed the cigarette from his lips before blowing out the smoke right in front of your face. Your nose scrunched up, as if on instinct, and Sukuna booped your nose with a shit-eating grin on his face.
“I swear,” you began, snatching the cigarette out of Sukuna’s hands, “if I don’t kill you, I hope these will.” Now was your turn to put the cigarette between your lips. You inhaled, and took a deep breath. But, only moments after, the cigarette was out of your hands and abruptly stubbed on a nearby ashtray.
Sukuna looked at you with an intent look on his face. “As much as I find that hot, I’d rather I be the one damaging my lungs. Not you.”
“Looking out for little old me? How cute,” you smiled, your tone sarcastic. “I see you’re not over us, yet, hm? Did that new girl change your mind?”
You leaned closer to Sukuna, your shoulders brushing ever so slightly.
As soon as you mentioned that other chick, Sukuna rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. It was nothing, we didn’t even hold hands. C’mon, all we did was sit next to each other at a party, and now you’re on my ass about her?”
You shrugged, picking up the magazine you had previously discarded and flipping through the pages with faux interest. “Oh, really? Didn’t look that way to me. You two sure seemed buddy-buddy.”
“Like hell we did. Fuck, do you want me to bring up that twig you were with last week? Kid’s got no meat on his arms. Can’t even call him a man. Is that seriously how low you’re willing to go, babe?” Sukuna scoffed at your lack of attention to him. “Shit’s even worse than a downgrade.”
“You can think that all you want. But I definitely disagree.” You struggled to stifle a giggle.
Sukuna, furrowing his brows, narrowed his eyes at you. “The fuck do you mean by that? Don’t tell me you’ve seen his dick.”
“I dunno, have I?” You turned to Sukuna, meeting his gaze with an equal amount of irritation.
“Must’ve been pretty small, though, if you can’t even remember it,” Sukuna pressed, leaning closer to you, your noses touching, before pulling away. “Whatever, this is boring. Say, how about we get back to where we left off, and practice that kissing scene, hm? I think it’s a great idea.”
“Ryomen, let’s not. You know we’re done. Been done. We’re through.”
“You don’t really mean that.”
“Oh, is it not obvious? I think it was pretty obvious when you had the nerve to get with a new girl just days after we broke up. And then you have the balls to call me right after the paparazzi catches you two. Really, Sukuna? I don’t mind the idea of us ending on neutral terms, but . . . 48 hours? Two days after we broke up, and you’re already fucking some girl? Way to go, Sukuna.”
“Don’t get ahead of yourself there, baby. We didn’t even kiss, did you see any pictures of us kissing? No. And, besides, it’s called provocation. Honestly, you should be praising me, because it worked in the end, didn’t it? I came ‘crawling back’ like one of your little bitch boys, and what happened? Oh, I remember; you let me right the fuck in to your apartment.”
As much as you hated to admit it, you couldn’t deny Sukuna. He was right. And, just the mere thought of what you two did after he hit you up brought heat to your cheeks.
The very same night after pictures of Sukuna and that new girl started circulating around the internet, Sukuna decided to text you:
hey pretty girl,
you up?
You were drying yourself off with a towel when you received two notifications on your phone, and when you saw the contact name, you frowned and turned off your phone without giving a response. Minutes after, there was a ring on your doorbell, and when you checked the camera, lo and behold, stood none other than the last pink-haired man you wanted to see that evening.
When you opened the door, wearing nothing other than a towel around your still dripping body, Sukuna couldn’t help but shamelessly check you out, deciding then and there that this definitely wasn’t going to be the end of your relationship. Of course, an argument ensued soon after, because that’s what life was like dating a dick like Sukuna. Luckily for you, however, Sukuna’s bulge in his pants was bigger than his ego, and so it made up for all of the playful bullying and teasing remarks that he frequently gave.
Sukuna—because he wasn’t born yesterday—knew his looks and charms fairly well, and often used them as a weapon or bargaining chip. That’s why, after you spent a minute or two berating and yelling at Sukuna near your front door, it only took the man one look into your eyes and one sultry comment to have you both stumbling into the . . . bedroom? No, you two had been apart for two days too long, and just decided to utilize your expensive kitchen counters for purposes completely unrelated to cooking.
The next morning, you two woke up—after getting just half an hour of sleep—and didn’t untangle from each other’s limbs until your manager called you nearly a hundred times, and forced you to get up and attend some interview or something. That, however, was not your last night with Sukuna. You two met up—intentionally or not—within the same week, whether it be at interviews or just random outings, and meddled with the other until one of you would fold (usually Sukuna) and consequently do something you would end up not fully regretting the next morning.
This affair continued until you finally came to your senses and blocked Sukuna out from your life in all ways possible. But, due to his bank account, Sukuna did end up purchasing multiple different phones just to be able to contact you. You may or may not have given in a few times, but in the end, you did end up leaving Sukuna for good.
“Reminiscing, are you? It’s okay, I’ve been doing that every night since you left the penthouse,” Sukuna laughed, noticing the way you went silent. You hated the way he referred to his place as The penthouse, and not, simply, his penthouse because, to be frank, for the years you both spent as a couple, you practically lived together despite having individual residences.
“What the hell, Sukuna. Just—Why are you even—?”
Sukuna cut you off, rolling his eyes. “I find it pretty hard to believe that not a single part of you misses me. Don’t lie; lying is a sin, y’know.”
“Sukuna—Excuse me? Don’t give me that shit. ‘Lying is a sin’ my ass. You must have to ask for God’s forgiveness pretty often, then. I can’t believe you want to call me a sinner, I mean, just—just look at you! You’re no saint, either, and you know that damn well.”
Sukuna raised his hands in defense, humoring you. “Woah, looks like I’ve been caught,” he laughed, before getting a little more serious. “But, don’t try to avoid the fact that you’re not innocent. Okay, we broke up due to not being able to make time for each other, and because of how much women I had to be around. Yeah, I get that. But it’s not like I was the only one taking up PR stunts. You did the same, too, didn’t you? So don’t try and paint me out to be the bad guy, when, at the end of the day, we did the same fucking thing.”
Irritated, you pinched the space between your brows. “I barely have any energy to say something to your stupid face right now. We broke up because of that, but also because of how much of a fucking dick you were and are. I knew you weren’t a total angel when we got together but—”
“Look. Do you want a nice guy?”
“. . .”
“Don’t feel pressured to answer, baby. We all know how you really feel.”
“Go. to. Hell. Sukuna. Seriously. This? Again? Do you even know how much of an ass you are? I should deserve an award for putting up with your shit for so long, God—”
“Yeahh, just keep talking,” said Sukuna in a teasing manner, as he leaned back against the couch, spreading his legs apart. You had never wanted to sit somewhere so bad.
“Are you fucking kidding me—mmph!”
You would’ve continued yelling and cursing Sukuna out for being such a dick had he not roughly pressed his lips against yours, immediately shutting you up. Because you still had some self-respect left, you fought back, throwing weak punches at his chest; but when Sukuna caught your wrists in his hands, you knew it was game over. Your muffled complaints soon turned to whimpers and sighs, as you shut your eyes and let your body do the talking.
Minute after minute, you gradually turned to putty in Sukuna’s hands. Fuck, as much as you hated to admit it, you had truly missed this. The feeling of his large, coarse hands roaming your body, tracing your curves, the feeling of his soft, but unruly hair under your fingertips, but most importantly, the feeling of his lips on yours.
At this point, you couldn’t even remember why the two of you broke up.
“Sukuna,” you murmured, pulling away for a moment to breathe. “We’re not together anymore. We shouldn’t—”
“Shouldn’t?” repeated Sukuna, eager to get back to where you left off. “Are you in a relationship with someone else? Am I in a relationship with someone else? No, and no. So enlighten me, my dear, why should we stop?”
“. . .” It was like he was challenging you, except, this time, it was a battle you could afford to lose. You wanted Sukuna, you really did. But admitting it was the hard part. You chewed on your bottom lip, contemplating every outcome, as Sukuna continued to stare at you with so much desire you could practically feel it.
“Are you hesitating because,” Sukuna paused, “—because you fucked someone else while I was gone?”
You sighed, swallowing the lump in your throat; you had never been more conflicted in your life. Placing your hands on Sukuna’s shoulders, you pushed back until Sukuna was sitting on the couch, and you were sitting on top of him—seated on his lap. As if on instinct, his hands made their way from your hips to the curve of your ass.
Sukuna gripped the globes of fat and muscle with a purpose, and let out an exaggerated groan at the missed feeling of you practically sitting on his dick. You were wearing nothing but a dainty, silky robe, and you clearly didn’t cross it over your chest too well, as Sukuna could see almost everything he had been missing out on during the past few months.
“Don’t even think about lying to me. I can feel you throbbing on my thigh, y’know.”
“. . .And?” You raised a brow; whispering in Sukuna’s ear, “What about it?”
Biting your lip, you let your hands wander up and down Sukuna’s neck, the spot you knew he liked you touching. When you broke things off with Sukuna, you didn’t know you could miss being able to trace his tattoos as bad as you did.
“Oh?” asked Sukuna. But when his fingers wandered up your robe, there was a sudden change in Sukuna’s demeanor, and he sucked in a breath.
“Adorable,” you laughed. “Cat got your tongue?”
“Shit, baby,” Sukuna groaned, “I bet you were expecting me to come and visit your little dressing room, huh. Even planned ahead and gave me a little surprise. Cheeky thing.”
Just seconds earlier, Sukuna’s fingers had been teasingly ghosting where you wanted him most, but when he noticed the lack of underwear you had on, he nearly lost it. You clearly weren’t making it easy for Sukuna to stay composed, he was sure of that much. Despite all of his belittling and teasing remarks, he definitely wasn’t as unaffected as he let himself seem to be.
“We’ve just been apart for so, so long.” You looked into Sukuna’s eyes, a faux pout on your lips as you looped your arms around his neck and pressed your tits up against his chest. “Can you blame me?”
“Fuck, girl,” Sukuna kissed his teeth. “You’re dripping wet. All for me?”
“Who the fuck else?”
Sukuna’s fingers danced around your entrance, collecting your slick as you pressed your thighs together, trapping his hand between your legs (not like he was complaining, though; that was probably the closest to Heaven Sukuna would ever get in his lifetime). “Mmm, that’s what I like to hear.”
It wasn’t a surprise when you pressed your lips against Sukuna’s, bringing him in for another zealous kiss. In an effort to get impossibly closer, your body curved into his, like you were puzzle pieces molded and created just for each other. You two moved in sync, as if you had both rehearsed this before; but, in truth, you two had just made out too many times to count, so kissing Sukuna was basically like breathing air. You needed it to survive, and, it was light work. What more could you say?
The tension and lust between you two grew, and your dressing room soon filled with the sound of sensual desire, moans and quiet gasps, and the creaking of the framework of your unfortunate couch, which had the misfortune of being beneath the two of you.
From the moment you had begun straddling his lap, you had pretended not to notice the growing erection below you; but, by now, it was pretty hard to ignore the bulge pressing against your ass. It was like, during the months you two spent apart, Sukuna’s dick was growing even larger than before. You didn’t remember it being so big. And, just the sight of it was enough to make you lick your lips in fear? Anticipation? . . .Definitely a mix of both.
As Sukuna made a show of removing his belt and pants, he grinned at the evident look of unfamiliarity on your face. “Scared?”
“Of course not,” you quipped, trying to put up a front, but your body betrayed you, displaying otherwise.
“Naturally,” Sukuna mocked, “that’s why I can practically feel your arousal, right?”
You bit your lip, “Shut up.”
Sukuna laughed, pushing the ends of your robe up to rest on your hips, and sliding his hands to your ass, squeezing each cheek with an equal amount of force. Damn, thought Sukuna, he had missed his favorite girls.
“Just because we haven’t done this in a while doesn’t mean you have to be afraid of it. C’mon,” Sukuna slowly repositioned and lowered your hips and spread your legs apart, easing his dick through your cunt, “there’s nothing to be shy about. I know you’ve been missing this.”
It was true, you and Sukuna hadn’t fucked in three whole months, and your body was definitely starting to forget how he felt. The feeling of your walls stretching to accommodate Sukuna’s length and size burned pleasurably, and you bit your lip to stifle a moan, which, in turn, just came out as a whimper instead.
Bracing yourself, you planted both palms on Sukuna’s broad shoulders as your lashes fluttered and your eyes shut tight. “So—nngh—So big, Sukuna. God.”
“Bet you’re real glad you decided to accept this role, after all, huh.”
Your eyes snapped open, and you glared at Sukuna. “Will you just shut—oh!”
Just as you were about to yell at Sukuna, he decided it was the absolute perfect time to give a rough thrust; and you could’ve sworn you felt him in your womb. Throughout all the years you two had been together, you rarely had the opportunity to actually sit on his dick, and, now that you had the chance, you realized how full you felt in this position compared to how you two usually fucked. Sukuna knew you liked it rough, but this . . . was like nothing you had experienced before.
Sukuna—laughing—leaned down just enough to whisper in your ear, “You were saying?”
“Fuck,” you gritted your teeth. “Just move, Sukuna, goddamnit. What’s the holdup? Don’t tell me the late twenties are catching up to your libido.”
“Ha! in your dreams. I was just thinking of a new way we could have fun. Let’s see, just how long can you go without moving, hm?”
You gulped. “W-What? Why would you—?”
“Because it’s exciting, and spices up things. Don’t you think so?”
“. . .”
As the minutes idly passed by, you grew hot and bothered, and exasperated. You couldn’t believe Sukuna was making you do this. Nearly ninety days you two spent apart, and now that you had gotten back together, he had the audacity to leave you high and dry? In a final attempt at getting any satisfaction, you moved to roll your hips, desperate to create any amount of friction to free you from this everlasting state between Heaven and Hell; but two rough hands abruptly caught you in motion, and swiftly held you down.
“Ah, ah, ah,” tutted Sukuna, in a mocking tone. “Did I say you could move?”
Clearly frustrated, you let out a whine; but as your hands move to give punches against Sukuna’s chest, he catches your wrists in his hands with ease, an evil smile on his face, like a predator that had successfully cornered their prey and was just seconds away from latching their teeth in.
The belt was already pretty loose, so when one of the sleeves on your robe slipped down your shoulder, revealing your bare chest, no one was that surprised.
“Oh?” Sukuna began. “What have we here?” His scarlet eyes roamed up and down your figure, as his grip on your wrists turned almost deathly.
“You . . . bastard,” you—suddenly feeling a bit shy—tried to tug your wrists out of his grasps, in order to cover yourself up, but your attempts were futile. “Let go of me—hnngh, shit.”
Your back arched, body curving closer to Sukuna’s as his lips abruptly wrapped around one of your already hard nipples, catching you off guard. You had never felt so overwhelmed; the feeling of Sukuna sucking on a tit while his dick was buried inside of you—unmoving—was nearly enough to make you cum, despite the lack of movement that Sukuna allowed.
Bringing you out of your dazed state was the sudden ringing of your phone on the table beside the ashtray. Your eyes widened in surprise, as you softly pushed Sukuna off of you. “Just—Just ignore it. It’s not important.”
“Right. But where’s the fun in that, huh?”
“You don’t mean. . .”
“You know what I mean. Answer it, on speaker,” Sukuna pressed. His tone told you he wasn’t going to repeat himself.
With shaky fingers, you reached for the phone, answered the caller, and put it on speaker. “H-Hello? Katayama?”
Katayama was the name of one of your co-stars. Or, in other words, the blonde dude, which Sukuna kept mentioning earlier.
“Hey, you! It’s pretty late right now, perfect time for us to go out and get some drinks, y’know? I’m a bit bored, as of lately.”
You were about to respond with an apologetic declination to his offer, but Sukuna cut you off as he roughly lifted up your hips and abruptly slammed them back down, causing you to choke back a moan, and cover it up with a faux series of coughs. “I’m, ah, a little . . . busy,” you whimpered, wincing at the tight grip on your hips—which was sure to leave a bruise in the morning, “right now.”
“Are you sick?”
“Uhm, no—I mean, yes!” You let out another fake cough just to seal the deal. “Yup, just a little under the weather.”
You bit your lip, trying to suppress a string of moans and curses as Sukuna continued slamming your hips up and down onto his.
“Well, if you’re ever in need of an extra warm blanket, don’t be afraid to—”
“Hahh.” A breathy moan slipped past your lips, and you could practically see the surprised look that was probably on Katayama’s face right now.
“—call . . . me. Uhm, are you sure you’re sick? You sound like you’re in the middle of . . . something. Is everything okay—?”
“Yup! Yeah, everything is totally okay,” you forced out, with an enthusiastic tone. Gripping Sukuna’s shoulder with your free hand for leverage, you shut your eyes tight as you quickly ended the call. “I’m a little occupied at the moment, I’ll call you ba—I’m gonna go. Bye!”
As swiftly as you hung up the call, you threw your phone across the couch, and let out all of the noises you had been previously bottling up.
“I’m so c-close.” You mewled, now even more desperate than you were before.
“If you dare cum,” Sukuna began, his voice low, “I’ll stop.”
“Sukuna!” You whined, scratching at his back and leaving little crescent shaped marks from your nails on his tricep. “I need to—ahnn!”
Squeezing your eyes shut, you held onto Sukuna’s shoulders for dear life as he quickened his pace. Lifting your hips up with ease, and slamming them back down with equal force. Fucked out of your mind was not enough to describe your current state, as your eyes rolled back into your head, and your lipstick was smudged across your mouth.
Sukuna leaned down to whisper into your ear, never stopping his movements. “Bet the little blondie didn’t fuck you like this, huh?”
It was obvious that Sukuna wasn’t an insecure guy; I mean, he had no reason to be. He had nice muscles, a good body, overall, sharp features, tempting eyes, and tattoos for days. But, you had to admit, the spark of jealousy was definitely a good look on Sukuna, one that you wouldn’t mind seeing every once in a while, if it meant seeing him like . . . this.
“. . .S-Sukuna, we never—we never even fucked in the first place.”
“Oh, yeah? How long you been without cock, then, huh? Must be why you’ve been acting like such a bitch. I almost feel bad; all this time, my baby’s just been depraved.”
“. . .F-fuck you,” you shivered, body practically shaking with need.
“No need to state the obvious, sweetheart. Fuck, even your tears taste sweet,” Sukuna groaned, licking a stripe up your cheek. “It’s as if you were literally made for me to devour.”
“Please, please let me cum! I’m so—hnngh—close.”
“Yeah, no. C’mon, I know my girl can last just a little longer, can’t you?” Sukuna grinned, biting his lip as he admired your dazed state. He hadn’t been able to touch you in three months, ninety days, 504 hours. If anyone was going to get their fill, it was him.
“Oh!” Your stylist exclaimed, after walking into your dressing room and noticing you lying asleep on the couch. “You’re already here. And, Sukuna’s here, too. Wait. . . SUKUNA’S HERE, TOO!?”
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samsno1 · 10 months ago
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Flowers
Castiel x GN!Reader
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i love his eyes. that's it, that's the tweet. guys...this is very sweet but i don't know if i'm satisfied?? tell me what you think, writing castiel is very hard, lawd
Summary: In a hunt, a flower appears over your pillow after you come back to the motel room at night. Who left it there?
Warnings: FLUFF, TOOTH-ROTTING FLUFF, i pictured s4/5 cas in this, use of y/n, sweet confession, NOT PROOF READ, that's it? english isn't my first language
WC: 2.5k
You can learn how to change Y/N for your actual name here
enjoy!
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When you started hunting with Sam and Dean one of the last things you expected to encounter was an Angel, especially after discovering they aren't “harps and halos" like in the books you read as a kid, but instead soldiers and sometimes assholes.
Castiel was an exception to the “asshole” part, he was actually very sweet when it came to you and the boys. Helped you, saved you and cared for you. In that sense, Cas was just like the Angel stories, a guardian of the humans he was in charge of.
And for you, it was fun teaching Cas about humans and how they behaved, helped him when he didn't understand Dean's pop culture references, got him to watch classic movies and listen to music and he was always very keen into doing so, curious and intrigued in what you explained to him.
Those big blue eyes always gave you his full attention, sometimes with that little frown that you started to call “The Angel Frown” while he questioned you about something that, to you, was basic knowledge. You were always as patient as possible with him, always clarifying what you could in words he could understand and that ended up always making him come to you for help.
In conclusion, you and Cas got closer and you started to catch yourself staring when he wasn't looking, admiring his smiles, drowning into his sapphire eyes and wishing that he had just more doubts about how people acted so you could spend more time with him.
You knew, from what Castiel told you, that Angels and feelings, human feelings at least, weren't compatible and that things such as love and romance weren't truly a reality for him and his siblings, they were warriors after all, created to serve their Father and that was it. 
Even when Castiel rebelled for the Winchesters, letting go of the “I don't serve men” mindset was difficult but you, Dean and Sam were there for him. You were more understandable then the brothers because you knew Cas was trying his best.
And because you fell for the Angel, but nobody needed to know that.
One night you arrived at the motel room you were staying at, after waving goodnight to Sam and Dean, them going to their separate room.
You opened the door and sighed deeply in exhaustion. It had been a long day of questioning and more questions appearing then those answered. At first you guys thought of a vengeful spirit, then cursed object, then witch. All of those possibilities were still up and it was driving you three insane. People were dying and you felt useless.
Once you closed the door and threw your stuff in the closest table you turned to your bed, where your bag was placed to get some clothes to take a well deserved shower. But, when you looked at your pillow, you noticed a single pink flower sitting over it and you furrowed your eyebrows.
You approached the flower slowly, skeptical about it, your hunter instincts telling you this wasn't good news. You slowly reached for it, as if it could bite your hand off, and picked it up. You analyzed the plant, very confused and grabbed your laptop.
You searched until you found a flower similar to the one you were holding and learned it was a Camellia. You looked between the screen and the flower and you searched up what a pink Camellia meant because, as much as you knew, flowers weren't really something you looked into.
What you found was shocking. According to the internet, a pink Camellia represents admiration and appreciation and Camellias and general represent love and affection. You widen your eyes at the flower in your hands, looking around your empty room as if someone would pop up and explain what this was doing at your bed. Wrong room?
You couldn't think of anybody that could give you this willingly. It definitely wasn't Sam or Dean because, first, they spent the whole day by your side and, second, unless they meant it platonically, the boys didn't see you like that. You loved them and they loved you, of course, but, to them, you were like a sister Dean loves you like he loves Sam, the same way Sam loves you like he loves Dean and vice-versa.
The only person that came to your mind was…No, it couldn't be, he said himself, love for him was basically unachievable but you couldn't help but wonder, even if your rational brain said it was stupid to think Cas would mean that. You smiled at the flower, that tinge of hope lightning inside you.
You looked around the room to look for something you could fill up with water and found an empty beer bottle. That'll do.
You washed the bottle to get the smell of alcohol off and filled it up with water, placing the little flower inside.
The pink color of the petals clashed with the transparent green of the bottle and you smiled at that. It looked cute in a way. You thought, even if this didn't come from someone you knew, you were keeping it, at least the flower.
You left the makeshift vase in your nightstand and took your stuff to the shower, peeling off your suit and your tie on the way, leaving it on the ground as you locked yourself inside the bathroom.
In these moments, Cas thanked his abilities of becoming unseen because you arrived just as he was leaving the Camellia over your pillow. He spent the day researching flowers, finding an interest in how humans always gave them to the people they cared about or to the ones who passed. He wanted to give you one to show you that he cared for you and also as a thank you for being patient with him for a long time.
He always felt happier around you, a warm feeling inside him always seemed to bloom. He felt the need to be close to you, like you were a human magnet. Everytime you looked at him he felt a weird feeling in his stomach, your smile was always something he felt the need to chase, he wanted to see it always in your face. He admired the way your eyes would shine when you were talking about something you liked.
When he saw you placing the flower on the nightstand with a smile he felt that weird feeling in his stomach again. He would do anything to see that look on your face again.
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That hunt lasted a week, taking you three too long to figure out it was a witch and even longer to find said witch and to say you guys were fed up was an understatement. 
For that long week you dared to say you missed the Angel, you thought about calling him, praying to him, multiple times but what were you going to say when he arrived? Missed you? I just wanted to see you?
Everything you thought sounded too intimate so you discarded the idea of calling him.
But two more flowers appeared on your pillow after that pink Camellia. A Peony that you learned meant for the Chinese something along the lines of “the most beautiful” and a stunning Carnation in a light red shade that represented admiration. At this point you were very intrigued about who was the one giving you the flowers, Castiel still on your mind. You didn't want to get your hopes too high, you were probably overthinking it anyways, making your heart speak louder than your brain.
You were lying on your bed, staring at the tiny bouquet of three flowers given piece by piece to you. It was your last night in that room, Dean having insisted he needed the sleep so as to not crash the Impala from tiredness. You had offered to drive as you weren't as bad as he was but, of course, that was an immediate no from the older brother so all of you settled for one more night.
As you close your eyes and start to fall asleep, a sudden flutter of wings gets your attention. It's dark in the room so you take a peek and for sure it's Cas. You hold back a smile and close your eyes, pretending to be sleeping.
You feel the Angel approaching the bed, his presence making your heart quicken in your chest. From what it sounds like, he's just standing, watching you and you start to feel very nervous.
Castiel on the other hand arrived to see your sleeping form and couldn't help but watch. You looked peaceful, your breathing was calm and you looked…pretty. Cas thought all his father's creations were wonderful but he felt like you could top them all, literally, in your sleep.
He had another little flower in his hand which, to him, had a very self-explanatory name, a Forget-Me-Not.
He spun the blue flower on his fingers, debating if he should leave it inside the vase or besides you, over your pillow. 
He approached you and while he was placing the flower next to your head he felt a gentle hand wrap around his wrist and instantly froze on the spot.
You opened your eyes and looked at his near-horrified face. You smiled at him.
“Got you” You said, a little above a whisper and looked at the flower he was holding. That one you knew the name and what it meant and you felt warmth spreading through your cheeks, not just at that one flower, but knowing now that all those flowers you received came from Cas.
“I'm sorry for disturbing you” He said as he retreated his hand and you held the Forget-Me-Not. He was tense, not looking at you.
“So you were the secret admirer leaving me these flowers?” You asked as you slowly sat up on the bed and placed the blue flower inside the bottle with the three others. You placed both your hands over your lap, fidgeting nervously with your fingers. “Why?”
He looked around. What was he supposed to say? Himself barely knew why he was doing this but it felt right so he kept going with it. He noticed that the flower meanings resembled things that he felt or thought of you and he enjoyed collecting them for you, especially after you kept them.
“These flowers all have a meaning behind them” He started “Take them as a thank you for…being helpful with my understanding of human behaviors” 
You smiled stupidly at that. The way he said it sounded like something he had rehearsed before coming to you to say it, the words too polite. But yet, that's one of the things you liked about him.
“You didn't have to Cas…They are beautiful, thank you” You said and looked at the flowers again, biting your lip. You felt his eyes on you, it was always intimidating. You knew that it was just the way he was, look right into your eyes while you talk to show you had his full attention, his beautiful blue orbs hypnotizing.
Cas analyzed every aspect of yours as you sat in front of him, his eyes wondering over your figure and his hands moved faster than his thoughts and he reached for your shoulder, his palm traveling from your shoulder blade to the end of your upper arm and back up, tracing a pattern over your skin. He longed to touch you and be closer to you in a way he couldn’t explain so, in this moment, you both alone, he decided to fulfill this wish.
You widened your eyes and looked up at Castiel who was entranced by the movement of his hand, goosebumps flaring up on your skin.
“Cas?” You said and acknowledged your call with a hum “What are you…?”
He finally looked at you, his hand steadied on your shoulder.
“When I’m around you I always feel this need to touch you, be closer and this…” He shakes his head, finding a word to define how he felt. “Warmth comes over me everytime you smile”
His eyes bore through yours and you could only stare back at him, shocked.
“Cas, you’re saying–”
“I think I might love you, Y/N” He interrupted. The way he said it sounded like a confusion, a slight approach, as if he was tiptoeing around the thought, not sure if he wanted to grasp it or just keep his distance.
You were dumbfounded. He sounded so sincere and your heart started to beat faster, his hand over your shoulder felt like it was burning through your skin. It all made sense, the flowers, the way he was always keen on talking to you even when you did most of the talking and he just listened with a faint smile and pure interest, he just didn’t know because he never felt like this before, he didn’t know what loving was like.
You landed a hand over his cheek, your eyes practically watering with an emotional overload at his words. You thumb rubbed the light stubble on his cheek and you pulled him in for a hug. You wanted to kiss him so bad but you were on a baby steps basis with the Angel.
You hugged him tightly, his hands hesitantly wrapping around your frame as you let out a deep breath. When you pulled back, you didn’t pull away completely from him looking between his eyes and his mouth, a giddy smile on your face.
“I think I might love you too Castiel” You said and he widened his own eyes, a light chuckle coming out of you at his reaction.
Your chuckles were cut off by his lips on yours and you gasped in surprise. His mouth was as soft as you expected, his lips moving against your in perfect sync. He was impressively a good kisser, one of his hands gently holding at the back of your neck while the other slid down to your waist.
You felt like a bomb had exploded inside you, a foreign feeling of happiness spreading to every single cell on your body as your arms wrapped around his neck to hold yourself when he sat on the bed, pulling you over his lap, making you yelp.
You both pulled away, your arms still wrapped around each other and he had a light smile on his face. You one hundred per cent had a shocked look on yours, your cheeks hot and breathing heavy.
“Where’d you learn that?” You asked, absolutely knocked by the kiss.
“Dean told me a thing or two” He said and you couldn’t help but laugh, your body shaking against his as he also chuckled. “It seems like I did great?”
You stopped your laughs and looked in his eyes, drowning in their ocean blue. You gave a peck to the corner of his mouth.
“You did amazing” You said as one of your hands played with the hair at the nape of his neck and he pulled you in, the warmth spreading through both of you yet again, never wanting to let go.
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A/N: Notes and reblogs encourage me to keep writing, feedback helps me make those writing better. Thank you for reading, XoXo.
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gremlingottoosilly · 25 days ago
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I'm not sure if my ask has been sent since I had shitty internet; Anyways.. Your Eldritch!Konig and witch!reader has been stuck ohmy head like a loop, UGH their dynamic is literally Dog x Chewtoy <3333 What if witch!reader is ovuating and (Begrudgingly) asks for her big monster to absolutely rock her shit 🥺 ((On a fluffier note: technically as her familiar, would he ever protect her from her enemies//other monsters??))
Familiars are supposed to serve their masters - this is the first line in the magic handbook you read from. The book had nothing on what you can do in case your familiar is a millenia-old monster from the depths of the universe who is a hundred times stronger than any or any witch alive, but you still try to honor that familiar-mistress bond as hard as you can. Besides, Konig was so good lately - only ever fucking up your potions twice last week and only eating one poor suitor who came to buy some of the herbs - that you decided to throw him a bone. Or, well, a pussy. You knew it was way above his melting point already - eldritch beings aren't known for their patience, and you sure as hell that Konig wouldn't really care for your boundaries in case you tried to establish them. Still, it was somewhat good to know that he didn't try to breed you yet - as much as he would lick and suck on your tits or force his tongue inside of your pussy, he never once tried to actually fuck you, with either his cock - if he has one, you aren't entirely sure - or his tentacles. And it drives you crazy. The biological clock is ticking, and sometimes, when you spend the whole day in a murky basement trying to perfect the incantations on the artifact that would take weeks to complete, you just want someone to hold you. To hold you with their strong, muscular hands, claw at your underwear and plop your leaking hole on their monstrous cock, making you take it all until you feel it bruising your womb and filling your life with a new purpose...god, you're desperate. Desperate enough to call in for your familiar, to ask - demand - that he will take you right here, on the same bed that you usually not allow him to lay in. Konig is an eldritch monster, but he can fuck - he pushes his tentacles inside, finding your hole already slick from all of your useless masturbation attempts earlier. Konig is more than happy to fill you up, force you to carry his eggs inside until the remaining magic finally sips into your womb and somehow makes you this much stronger - god, he fucking adores you, silly little human, still thinking you can get powers outside of his reach. At least you're cute, unlike most humans. He can't wait to breed you for days after your ovulation is over - you did ask him to fill you up, didn't you?
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delulu-with-wandanat · 5 months ago
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Objective: Teenage Dreams.
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Pairings: Wanda Maximoff x Natasha Romanoff
Tags: Pride month, bisexual Wanda, mutual pining, canon divergence, lesbian Natasha.
A/n: My gift before pride ends lol, it a little rushed but uhh... I enjoyed writing it and I hope you enjoy reading it. It's kind of a crack fic honestly, just good vibe for ye gays :D (Ps. sorry if there are mistakes I kind rushed this andd it's been a while.)
Summary: It's pride month and Wanda still hasn't made her move. Being the self-proclaimed greatest ally, Y/n and two other decided to give them a push.
On lazy days like these, Wanda usually spends it by reading a book, maybe binge watching some shows. Other times she spends it with her brother, but ever since joining the Avengers, Pietro has made it his ultimate goal to have Steve Roger's physique. He trained almost day and night, honestly Wanda could enter the gym at 9 in the morning finding her brother in the middle of a workout, and by the time she was finished he was still there.
Often time he was also with her best friend, who is now his gym buddy, Y/n Romanoff. Who was just as much of a gym rat as Pietro. Honestly, the amount of time they stare at themselves in the mirror was concerning. She's almost sure she had passed a video on social media featuring them titled; 'How to train like an Avenger'
So nowadays she spends her free time alone, even though she wishes she could spend it with a certain beautiful redhead-
Although it wasn't all that bad. Wanda had found a new fixation to spend her time on. Which was Fanfictions.
Now how does one stumbles upon this... wonderful world you might ask? Well for Wanda it started when she was watching a new TV Show she had recently discovered called, The 100. It was fun until they killed off one of her favorite character, Lexa. Wanda naturally dropped the show in an instant. During one of her rants to one of the new recruits, Kate Bishop then sent her a link leading to a website followed a text that read; "The showrunners might break your heart, but fanfiction authors will be there to pick up the pieces."
And Wanda... Fell down the rabbit hole from there.
At first all she searched was merely about wlw couples on her favorite movies and shows, like that one Supergirl TV show she had been recently watching. Or that one cute show called 'Everything Sucks' that got canceled after one season. Basically any wlw couples she started to like, but couldn't be explored due to the showrunners being a pus-
It didn't matter, she founded the holy-site that held all the stories in the world. Then, when she found nothing else to read there, it lead her journey to... a site that shares the same name as drinking bottle; Tumblr. Minus the 'e'.
The site gave her access to a whole new world and whole lot more stories. It was on this website that she found out there was a whole fandom for the Avengers, and many stories was written about them in different scenarios. Sometimes it was cute, other times it was... questionable-
You can't really blame her, can't you? Her name and the word mommy was basically inseparable on this site.
This was where she learned that people have also been 'shipping' one Avenger and the other. Curiosity got the better of the witch when she started to search herself... and a certain former Russian spy. She was surprised to see how many stories were written about them here. Wanda... may have gotten a little out of hand.
This was her guilty pleasure. Reading stories about her crush and herself in a scenario instead of actually trying to talk to her. Can you blame her though? She was what the internet describes as a 'Loser Lesbian'.
The little voice in her head prefers the word 'Useless Lesbian', which wasn't even accurate as she mostly resonates more with Bisexuality-
"Happy gay month, cus you know you bi and stuff!" Ah there it is, the 'little voice' burst through her door unannounced, causing Wanda to yelp and quickly shut her laptop close to hide her 'shameful' activity.
Wanda glared at the young Romanoff who was carrying 3 different items in his hand and approaching her on the bed. "What the fuck is wrong with-"
"Here, I got you a gay balloon cus it got all the color because it's GAY."
"Y/n-" She reluctantly takes the balloon.
"And I gotchu a vinyl album with that Sweater Weather song cus you Bi." He handed her the vinyl, how thoughtful.
"Ok-"
Lastly, "And I baked you a cake that says, 'BeeEE who yoOOUUu aaRREEE, for YooUURE PRiiiDEEEEeeeEE'" He sang the word off tune.
"Ok- Thank you... Uhm-" She grabs all the items and looks at them with confusion. "This is..." Wanda furrowed her eyes at her friend. "Why- Why did you do this, why are you doing this??"
"You know... Cus you're Bi!"
"I'm well aware of that fact."
"Well my dearest Wanda, in this holy month of June I have a very important mission to accomplish." The young Romanoff suddenly jumps on her bed and dramatically opens his arms as if he was some kind of showman. "I'm gonna get you a woman!"
The youngest Maximoff cringes her face and with a flick of her wrist she knock the soldier off her bed, earning a high pitch scream from him. "First of all, you can't get a woman for yourself how do you expect to get me a girlfriend."
"I have plenty of girls!" He said rather defensively as he sat up on the floor.
"And second, why is this so important to you?"
"What you don't want a girlfriend?"
"I still like guys you know."
He rolled his eyes, "I know that, but you always told me you wanted to try dating girls."
"Not just girls... a girl-" She mumbles.
"What was that?" The man raised a teasing eyebrow.
"Nothing! Now shut up, you haven't answered my question." Wanda said while huffing and crossing her arms.
"Because my dearest friend being Bisexual is one thing, but being bi yourself is just sad-" That statement earned him a rightful pillow thrown at him at full speed. Which he thankfully manages to deflect this time with his reflex.
Wanda then groans and plops on her bed. "You're not going to stop, are you?"
"Nope." Y/n even popped the 'p' to emphasize his point. With a roll of her eyes, Wanda agrees with an exaggerated fine and he joined her on the bed with a grin. "Now, first thing on the list is we need to get you some new clothes."
Wanda hastily sat up looked down at her current outfit and glanced at the mirror in her room. She gave him a stinky eye. "What's wrong with my clothes??" This rude bitch-
"Nothing..." Y/n said rather sassily, "I just... think it might need a little spice is all." Without asking for her permission, Y/n grabs her laptop out of her reach and opens it. "I was thinking we could- WHOAAA..."
"What's- NO!" Her eyes widens in panic has her dirty little secret have been exposed. The witch lunges herself to him only for the young super soldier to hold out a hand to keep her at a distance while staring bewildered at the screen before him. "GIVE IT BACK."
"OH MY GOD???? YOu into this shit?!!" Oh the young Romanoff was having the time of his life. He grinned as he looked at what the story was about, "Natasha Romanoff x Reader? Ohhh ho HO, you really llike her huh-?"
"Y/n I swear to god, GIVE IT BACK." She yelled, Wanda was fucking furious. She already had an annoying brother to deal with, what was she thinking adding Y/n into the mix.
"I want to see your blog." It was like she was seeing red, blood thumping in her brain.
Wanda screeched like a maniac, suddenly overpowering the super soldier. She was practically sitting on top of him wrestling with the now closed laptop, Y/n hugged the laptop close. "Y/N I WILL KILL YOU!"
"I JUST WANT TO SEE!"
"NEVER!" Their screaming was probably heard all over the compound as they wrestle for Wanda's laptop. However, a stern voice stopped their childish fight.
"Enough, both of you!" The two whipped their head to the door to see Natasha crossing her arms and looking at them expectantly. The two scurry off of each other and Wanda made a final yank on her laptop out of his reach. The two stood up like guilty children caught in a fight.
"He took my laptop without permission." Wanda spoke up before Y/n could open his mouth. The look of betrayal on his face brings pleasure to Wanda as Natasha's anger was now directed to him.
"You-"
"Y/n, you know better than to take other people's personal things." Natasha glared at her little brother.
"You're just going to believe her right out of the gate?!" He retorted.
"It's the truth!" Wanda said while hugging her laptop tightly.
"You little snitch-" The super soldier turned to face her challengingly. Before the two were about to enter yet another screaming match, Natasha's stern voice puts them in their place once again.
"You two are acting like children. I have enough of this, Y/n if you don't stop this childish nonsense I'll have you grounded from any missions."
"You can't do that?!" His eyes practically bulge out of it's eye socket.
"I can, and I will." Natasha's death stare easily intimidates him as he quickly mumbles an apology to Wanda. The spy's gaze turned to the witch with soft and caring look, unlike the one she gave to her sibling. "Wanda, if he gives you anymore trouble you let me know ok?"
"Thank you, Natasha." Wanda said shyly, a faint blush visible on her cheek. The redhead smiled at her before giving one last glare to Y/n and left to god-knows-where.
It was so painfully obvious that the two liked each other. Except the only one that fail to realize that is themselves. Operation Scarlet Widow was going to be a lot more difficult than he anticipated, Y/n might need a little backup.
"I seriously don't get why you can't just ask her out instead of reading a bunch of stories-"
This annoying fuck- "DON'T talk to me about that!" She suddenly uses her powers to float him out of her room. "I don't wanna hear about it-" She practically throws him out, Y/n lies on the floor while looking at his friend bewildered. Wanda gave one last glare and shuts the door on his face.
"But-"
"And stay out!" Her voice yelled from inside the room.
Being the annoying friend that he is, he got onto his feet and proceeds to bug the shit out of the witch. Y/n started with those gentle knocks on the door. "Honeyyy-" He teased her.
"Ohmyfuckinggod. Don't call me that!" Wanda yells again. Y/n snickers at her response.
"Wanda, come on..." He knocks again, hearing no response the soldier knocks on the door harder. "You can't hide forever, come out!"
"Jokes on you, I already am!"
"Not what I meant, but ok!" He snickers again, clearly Wanda would not be opening the door anytime soon. He makes his way to the gym to recruit some people who shall help him in this mission.
------
Upon entering the training grounds, Y/n found Yelena and Pietro in the middle of a sparring session. Only these two would spend their Sundays training.
"Dearest Brother, nice of you to join us." Of course Yelena would know it was him, despite having her back facing Y/n.
"Let me know when you want to spar with someone who can actually throw a punch." The soldier said with a smirk.
"Fuck you, Romanoff!" The silver-haired speedster gave him the finger before focusing back on his opponent. "You're the one who's lacking, I thought super soldiers could do this all day?"
Y/n scoffed, "Oh please, I can take you down without breaking a sweat. You rely mostly on your powers."
"Barf, are you going to keep bothering us or join us?" Yelena said with a roll of her eyes, using the distraction Pietro surges forward in an attempt to tackle Yelena. Although she may not have powers, her skills were beyond his years. Using the techniques taught by none other than her own sister, Yelena manages to take down the speedster with ease.
"Hah!" She snorted seeing Pietro with his face on the ground and tapping the floor to announce his defeat. Yelena gets off of him with a smirk on her face.
"Oh come on! If this was a real fight you know you wouldn't stand a chance." The speedster grumbles.
"I'm not denying that, but take that power away and you're just another damsel in distress."
Pietro narrowed his eyes. In the midst of her overconfidence, he uses his powers to knock Yelena on the feet, causing her to fall backwards onto her ass. Normally, her instinct would've kicked in and she would prepare for the fall, but this time Pietro stands in triumph while crossing his arms with a smirk on his face.
"Bitch." Yelena mumbles in Russian before dusting herself off.
"Now if you're both finished, I would like to make an offering." Y/n said while putting his fingers together like some menace business man with bad intention.
"You want to steal Tony's car and do a high speed race on the highway? I call dibs on the Mclaren." Yelena spoke up.
"So long as I get the Ferrari-" Pietro chimes in.
"No, but we'll get back into that because I always wanted to try his Audi. What I have is, how would you feel on playing cupid for our dearest sisters?" Yelena only raises an eyebrow while Pietro squints his eyes.
"I am getting sick of seeing them practically eye-fucking each other at the gym." Yelena started.
"Hey, that's my little sister." Pietro said while puffing his chest out playing the overprotective big brother role.
Yelena rolled her eyes, "She's 27 dipshit, and you're only 12 minutes older."
"Still my little sister..."
"Look we can all agree that these two needs to sort out their feelings, and since the two are completely useless as one is an idiot who thinks staring will magically get her a date. And the other has deep traumatic issues where she struggles to have proper relationship due to her upbringing. I'd say, maybe they need a little third party help?" Y/n opens his arms as if to wait if any of the two objects.
"And how do you plan on pulling this off?" Yelena asked.
"I was hoping you might help me figure that out." Y/n threw back the question. Yelena rolled her eyes.
"So you came to us for help empty handed?"
"Well I would argue dedication and sheer will counts for something." Y/n puffed out his chest, he clearly has nothing.
"We don't even know if Natasha likes Wanda back." Pietro chimes in, which earns him a raised eyebrow from the two Russians.
"It's hard to miss."
"Yeah, I can see the oblivious genes runs in the Maximoff's."
Maybe it was less obvious to someone who was not close to Natasha, she was a trained spy overall. And these two were practically raised to be more observant than others. Or that could just be the oblivious Maximoff genes.
"All I know is, Wanda has had this crush ever since she stole Natasha's jacket."
Y/n furrowed his eyebrows at Pietro. "Wasn't that like... a year ago with Ultron?" Yelena barks out a laugh, "You mean to tell me she's been pinning on Natasha for a year??"
Pietro shrugs his shoulders and smirked, "Wanda has bigger pool, but I'm the one getting all the girls."
"Barf-" Yelena said while fake gagging, earning a jab on the rib by Pietro. "If we want a shot for our dearest love birds we have to be quick, cause I'm noticing a certain android having his eyes on Wanda."
"Who, the toaster?" Pietro said while cringing his face.
"Ok... I can see you don't seem so fond of the guy, and Vision's not so bad y'know-" Y/n said, it's not that he was close with Vision. But he didn't understand why Pietro would look so utterly disgusted.
"No, he's not bad. But if this works out, you and I would be brothers for real, y'know?"
Damn... This was true brotherhood. "Bro..."
"Bro..."
The two hugged like it was something out of a bromance movie. Yelena could only watch with her arms crossed, wondering what the fuck was going on. However, while the two gym rats were having their moment, a plan formed in her mind.
-------
The trio sprang into action in an instant, ordering a bunch of pizzas, heading to the city to grab some supplies, thankfully alcohols were already taken cared of.
"Ok! Now we just need everybody here." Y/n said with a satisfied grin whilst taking a shot to give himself a head start. Yelena mimicked his movement and so did Pietro.
"FRIDAY, assemble the team to the common room." The AI gave Pietro the acknowledgement, soon enough the team entered the common room with a confused look.
"What's going on?" Steve was first to spoke up as he looked around the decorated room with food and beverages.
Wanda glances to a certain redhead a few meters away from her, Natasha initially had a bored look on her face, arms crossed, and was probably mentally preparing herself to whatever the hell her siblings had in mind. And it was as if the spy felt a pair of eyes on her she looked to the side and locked eyes with Wanda, instantly, the corner of Natasha's mouth pulled into a tiny smile and a small shrug.
Wanda blushed instantly and turned her gaze to the floor, tucking a hair behind her ear. The trio, saw this and glances at one another.
"Well dearest teammates." Y/n started, taking a microphone and speaking to it as if he was an mc. "Tonight will be the night-"
"What's with the mic, Y/n?" Natasha asked with a roll of her eyes.
"I was getting there," He responded while putting his hand up, "Tonight Is the night we let loose!" He whooped, yet the only one cheered with him was Pietro.
"Seriously?" Natasha asked with a raised eyebrow.
Y/n scoffed at his teammates, looking at all the low faces and annoyed faces. "Sam! Come on, you're always game." He asked, needing ATLEAST someone to be in it.
Sam sighed, "Man, I would but honestly I was looking forward to sleep early tonight." Y/n looked at him as if his heart had been stabbed.
"Wanda??" He asked his best friend, and Wanda groaned at him. Oh this was a rough start.
"Honestly, I'm in the mood for some me time and not... whatever this is." She replied indicating to the alcohol bottles on the table.
"Sorry kid, looks like everyone is super tired." Steve added with a pity look, "Maybe next time plan things out."
"But that's boring!" Pietro exclaimed, and speeds to every single one handing out a shot glass filled with vodka.
"It's not just any normal drinking night, there's singing involved." Yelena finally chimed in while dunking another shot.
"Yelena, you can't possibly be part of this." Natasha asked her sister, and Yelena shrugged in respond.
"Any reason to grab Tony's alcohol is as good as any." The blonde replied.
Everyone glanced at one another, shot glass in hand, contemplating their decision. "Think of it like a team bonding." Y/n talked again, he cocked his head at Yelena who turns on a song and a familiar tune started playing, a song that would get anyone from any generation dancing (excluding Steve, perhaps). Dancing Queen by Abba.
Y/n had a goofy grin on his face, dancing into the tune, Pietro followed through while Yelena occasionally bopped her head. Sam was the first to grow a grin on his face. Steve, Natasha and Wanda looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "It's Abba!" The falcon said as a matter of factly, he then downed in shot.
"That's the spirit!" Y/n said excited as Sam danced to his direction.
Hesitantly, cap started to walk forward earning a disbelief gasp from Natasha. "Rogers, really...?"
"I mean, I really did enjoyed Mama Mia...." The American boy said with a sheepish smile.
As soon as the lyric's intro came in, Y/n puts an arm around Steve with a microphone in hand. "You can dance!"
"You can jive!" Sam pulled the microphone to himself.
"Having the time of your life!" Those who were already in the circle sang simultaneously, Natasha rolled her eyes but if you squint you could see a tiny smile there. Meanwhile Wanda shifted closer to Natasha watching the group in amusement.
"See that girl!" Y/n pointed at the two, and the other followed. "Watch that scene, digging the dancing queen." He sang, "Come on dancing queens get in here!"
Natasha shook her head fondly, holding back a smile.
"Wanda, Wanda, I know you want to join us girrlll..." Y/n said playfully to his best friend, the boys and Yelena were beckoning her to join. Natasha looked to her side and true enough, Wanda was biting her lips, contemplating whether or not she should join. "You like this song don't lie! Natasha, help me out." Wanda did in fact like this song.
The way her body swayed subtly to the rhythm, her eyes glinting with anticipation, the only thing that's holding Wanda back was herself. Fuck it, Natasha thought to herself. She then held Wanda's arms and dragged her into the group who cheered when they joined. "Wha- Nat, no I-"
"Come on, little witch." Natasha said, turning to face Wanda and raised her shot glass. "Loosen up a bit."
God, Wanda couldn't decline, especially when her crushed smirked like that. They clinked their shot glass and downed their drinks.
------
As the clock got closer to midnight, the more they drank, and the more they drank, the more chaotic it gets. The song they choose ranges to many different genres, in the beginning Pietro and Y/n mostly sang something boyish, like rap or rock. Then as the two gets progressively drunker they sang something what would be describe as 'Girly Pop'.
Steve sang some old 40s song, which was refreshing especially after hearing Y/n's off tune singing voice. Everybody except Natasha was surprised to hear Yelena singing American Pie wholeheartedly, Natasha even sat next to her and sang it with her briefly.
Although the highlight of the night was probably the time Yelena, Pietro and Y/n sang and dance to the song 'Wannabe' by Spice Girls. Natasha had to hid her face with her hand while Sam was laughing his ass off and leaning to Steve for support. Wanda was like a giggling maniac the whole time as she was secretly recording it for some black mailing material on her twin.
Mid-song, Yelena pulled her brother subtly and pushing a very drunk Pietro forward. "Take it for a spin, Maximoff!"
"So, here's a story from a to z-!" Pietro started rapping his part drunkenly.
"She's not drunk enough." Yelena said to Y/n who was trying to stable himself.
"Yep, the alcohol hasn't hit her yet, and Pietro's not going to be much help-" Y/n covered his mouth suddenly as he felt a vomit, he then answered after seeing Yelena's raised eyebrow. "Sorry- Don't worry I got this, hold a bottle."
"Slam your body down and wind it all around!" Pietro continued singing with Yelena twirling his ass in what this generation would describe as 'slay' manner, Y/n drunkenly sauntered over to Wanda who panicked when he started pulling her to the make shift stage.
"No- No, let me go, Y/n!" Wanda protested.
"Just take a shot and come with!" Y/n practically yanked her and they stumbled over to the middle of the living room. "Cheers!" He said while knocking his glass with hers and Wanda finally relents and knocked back her shot.
"-make it last forever, friendship never ends!" Y/n sang while putting an arm around his best friend, Wanda cringes at the bitter taste of the alcohol, she had a few drinks in already but she was never really fond at the taste of vodka.
"Wanda!" Yelena said, suddenly putting an arm around the her as well. "Oh, honey, you emptied your glass already."
"N-no, Yelena, I just dra-"
"Don't you worry, I got you." Yelena said while pouring her another shot, Wanda's eyes widens. She glances to the side and locked eyes with Natasha who raised a teasing eyebrow at her. "Yes, now we cling!" The blonde haired woman said while raising her glass.
Reluctantly, Wanda clinked their glass awkwardly and took a deep breath before taking another shot. She doesn't know how many shots she have taken from that moment, all she knew was that she felt like dancing.
Natasha watched as Wanda's dance move progressively become more fluid and at ease in contrast to her usual shy self. The spy smiled to herself, dance with her. Natasha shook her head at the impulsive thoughts. At some point during the song 'Teenage Dreams' by Katy Perry, Wanda was handed a mic by Yelena. Thankfully this time Wanda was drunk enough not to refuse, and instead grinned like a goof.
When Wanda sang the second verse, Natasha almost lost her breath because she sounded so... beautiful.
"We drove to Cali and got drunk on the beach. Got a motel and built a fort out of sheets."
Wanda sang with her eyes closed, smile on her face, swaying her body to the rhythm. "I finally found you, my missing puzzle piece, I'm complete." The witch opened her beautiful green eyes just to have a similar looking ones staring right back at her.
Wanda giddily approached Natasha and extend her hand, "Wanda-"
"Come onn, Tasha!" Wanda pleaded. Tasha, well that's new-
Natasha hesitantly looked around, the trio were holding onto each other while slurring to the song, Sam had passed out, and Steve... Well, he gave Natasha a knowing look before helping Sam up to his feet and gave Natasha a look that says 'Don't mess this up, Romanoff.' And walking off with a drunken Sam.
"We can dance, until we die. You and I..." Wanda sang waiting for Natasha to finally grab her hand, finally the spy relents and took the witch's offering hand. "-we'll be young forever!"
Wanda practically yanks Natasha into the middle of the living room.
"You make me feel like I'm livin' a teenage dream. The way you turn me on, I can't sleep. Let's run away and don't ever look back, don't ever look back!"
The younger woman puts a hand on Natasha's shoulder, swaying her hips while singing the lyrics. Natasha was unsure if she should put her hand on Wanda, keep it to the side, on Wanda's waist perhaps?
"My heart stops." The witch suddenly tilt Natasha's chin so their eyes meet. "When you look at me," Natasha's breath hitched in her throat, "just one touch...." And the rest of the lyrics seems to died on Natasha's ears as all she could see was a drunken state Wanda making her confession crystal clear.
Wanda turned and moved her body sensually against Natasha, without hesitation, the older woman puts a firm hand on Wanda's hips to guide her moves. Wanda shivered when she felt Natasha's hot breath on her ear. "Imma get your heart racing in my skin-tight jeans." She grabs Natasha's hand and trail it up her body, a silent plea to the older woman to touch her. "Be your teenage dream tonight..."
Fuck... if Natasha had no self-restraint, she would've taken Wanda here and there. "Let you put your hands on me in my skin-tight jeans" Wanda turns around to face Natasha again and this time the younger one guided Natasha's hand to rest on her thighs. "Be your teenage dream tonight...."
The song reached it's mini pause. Wanda, almost in desperation and system full of alcohol wrapped her arms around Natasha and leaned in til their nose was touching. "I want to kiss you so bad..." She whispered.
"I-" The redhead was at lost for words, her eyes looking deep into those beautiful green eyes, searching for any signs of hesitation. Blown pupils were looking right back at her, slowly it travels down to Natasha's lips. Fuck this.
As soon as the song started again, Natasha gently cup Wanda's face with one hand and pulled her into a soft kiss. Oh Wanda's heart could explode right about now, for a second her mind became stone-cold sober so it could remember this moment properly. Wanda drops the microphone she was holding and puts her hand on the older woman's cheeks, using her thumb to caress her soft delicate skin.
"You make me, Feel like I'm livin' a teenage dream The way you turn me on, I can't sleep Let's run away and don't ever look back, don't ever look back."
The two women were now lost in their own world, they failed to notice the cheers from their own respective (very drunk atm) siblings. Wanda was taller than Natasha, but she went on her tippy toes and wrapped her slender arms around the spy. Natasha craned her neck a little, smiling into the kiss, her arms securely on (her) the little witch's waist.
"My heart stops, when you look at me. Just one touch, now baby I believe this is real. So take a chance and don't ever look back."
Wanda felt like she was on cloud nine, feeling Natasha's soft lips on hers. Oh those sweet plump lips she's been day dreaming about for months, honestly, she felt like the main character in a movie. A teenager if you will in a coming off age movie, is this what Simon felt like from Love, Simon? The song was quite spot on, as Natasha made her feel like a teenager once again, or at least what she assumes a teenager would feel. She never really got to properly enjoyed her teenage years, but here she is. With the woman of her dreams.
"We're siblings for real!" They finally broke the kiss after hearing a drunken Y/n made the statement, arms on both Yelena and Pietro who were just as equally drunk as him. Pietro mimicked his sentence, and Yelena only nodded her head while occasionally raising her glass. Natasha and Wanda shared a look as they held each other, the spy snorted while her counterpart giggled at the scene.
It seems like the trio had put Katy Perry's song on shuffle, because the beat to 'Last Friday Night' started playing.
They started chanting "We did it!" matching their words to the tune of the song, the two couple shared a look.
"Do you wanna get out of here?" Natasha asked, a small smile on her face.
"Yes, please." Wanda replied shyly before being dragged out of the living room by Natasha.
-------
The witch woke up groggily on her bed, her eyes needed time to adjust to the light that were peaking into her room. She groaned and fell back onto the bed with a thud, shielding herself from the light like a vampire allergic to it. "Ugh... what did Yelena put in my drinks." She grumbles.
All of the sudden everything came rushing back into her memory like a tidal wave. I kissed Natasha...
She hastily sat on her bed and looked around. She remembered they kissed, but... how did they end up here. Wanda remembered Natasha asking her to move out of the living room, oh my god did we slept together? The witch's face started to match her battle suit as she thought of the possibility, wish I could've remembered.
Her throat felt dry so she decided to grab herself some drinks in the kitchen. And to her surprise, Natasha was already there. Humming to herself and cooking breakfast, Wanda let in a sharp breath at the sight. Of course, being the trained spy that she is, Natasha greeted Wanda without having to turn around.
"Good morning, Wanda. Slept well?" Natasha asked kindly.
"I don't know how you do that." Wanda muttered.
The spy chuckles to herself, "What I was trained for, little witch. I already put a glass of water for you by the table. Bacon and eggs alright?"
Wanda glanced at the table and surely enough Natasha already prepped a big jug of water and a glass for her. "Oh thank you, you're a godsent..." The younger woman took a seat and dawned her water, and then also her second glass of water.
Natasha walked by her and set a plate for both herself and Wanda. "What a night was it?" She said with a hint of tease.
The brunette only nodded her head while drinking her water like it was the last one on earth. She dropped her glass with a sigh of relief and glances at Natasha, a faint blush appeared on her cheek almost immediately. Wanda cleared her throat before answering, "It was, thank you for breakfast."
"You're welcome." She replied simply, her body still angled a little to the side, one arm propped on the head of the chair whilst staring intently at Wanda.
"Natasha, I..." Wanda started, oh god suddenly her throat feels dry again. The spy gave a small nod, urging her to continue. The younger woman started fidgeting with her finger. "I don't regret it," Wanda finally looks at her. "Kissing you, all of it, I don't regret any of it."
A smile tugged the corner of Natasha's lips, but before she could answer, Wanda started rambling on.
"B-but it's ok if you don't feel the same. Or that it was just a heat in the moment kind of thing."
"Wanda, relax." The older woman put a gentle hand on Wanda, she inhaled sharply at Natasha's action. "Listen... I'm no better at this. However, if your interested, I would like to take you out on a date." Natasha smiled at her, oh god, Wanda's heart was beating a mile minute. Wait, wait, she said date?
"I- Yes, I would love that." Wanda averted her gaze, the intensity of Natasha's green eyes was too much. The sheer intensity of the spy's gaze could turn her into a puddle of mess.
"Good, I've been dying to try this restaurant." Natasha said while turning her body now to face her breakfast, she took one bite of the bacon before continuing. "I hope Southeast Asian cuisine isn't too spicy for you." The spy said teasingly.
"Oh please, you underestimate me." Wanda responded with a slight bump of their shoulders, yet a question still lingers on her mind. "Hey uh... Sorry, I was just wondering. Did we uh... do anything?"
"What do you mean? We kissed." Natasha answered cluelessly.
"Yeah, but I remember you took me to my room. I couldn't remember anything from there, so... I was just wondering if we did anything." Wanda asked, her voice progressively gets more timid the more she explains.
"Hmmmm, like what? Watching a movie?" The spy said while looking up to the ceiling as if deep in thoughts, small smirk on her face.
"Tasha, stop messing around." Wanda said with a playful eyeroll.
"Tasha, huh? That's new." She continued to teased her little witch. Wanda playfully pouted her lips, of course Natasha couldn't help but give in to that. "Don't worry, little witch, nothing happened. I took you to your room, we made out for a little bit and before you finally fell a sleep in my arms. It was a adorable." Natasha added the last bit with a shrug and a smirk.
Wanda's face got increasingly red, "Ugh..." She groaned at hid her face in her hand. "I'm sorry."
"Don't hide that pretty face, as I said, it was adorable." Natasha pried away Wanda's hand, the witch relents and was greeting with a fond smile from Natasha. One she rarely saw, god she's so fucking beautiful.
And unfortunately for them, it had to be ruined by the trio... Again.
"Ughh.... my head-" Y/n groaned.
"I feel like skipping gym today." Pietro chimed in.
"Keep up." Yelena responded with a bored tone. She was sweating, probably went on a run.
Wanda and Natasha mentally cursed at themselves and returned to their own respective breakfast. The trio rummages through the kitchen, finding cereals and bowls, Yelena opted for an apple instead. They sat down across Natasha and Wanda, Y/n was first to point out the obvious of course.
"So...?" He asked them excitedly.
"So what?" Natasha raised an eyebrow at him.
Only for him to raised his eyebrow right back, "Did you guys shag?" Yelena piped in, Pietro groaned.
"No, don't answer that-" The older Maximoff covered his ears while Wanda shrunk in her seat.
"I'll take that as a yes!" Y/n yelled excitedly.
"First of all, we didn't." Natasha said firmly, "And second, I don't see how that's any of your business."
"Oh, but it is." The redhead narrowed her eyes at him, but it was too early to deal with her brother's antics.
"Look whatever you saw, zip it." Natasha stated, "I personally want to keep this under wrap, if this goes out to the press they're going to have a lot of questions and I don't want to deal with that."
"I'll second that." Wanda muttered, casting Natasha a grateful look to which the older woman smiled in response.
Y/n scoffed, "Whatever, I'm great at keeping secrets. Beside, I'm just glad the whole sexual tension can now be resolved-" He shuts up immediately upon seeing Natasha's glare.
After a few minutes of silence and eating their breakfast, Y/n's phone notification started going off like crazy. "Oh, Piet I think one of our videos got viral."
"Where let me see." Pietro leaned over to take a look, and upon opening the app, their eyes quickly widens. "Why would you upload that?!"
"I didn't! I must've- Fuck..." Y/n panicked, and by that, really panicked.
"What's going on?" Natasha asked.
"Nothing!" The two men said simultaneously, fuck... if Natasha finds out they're screwed. However, before they could delete the evidence, Natasha snatched the phone from her brother's hand. Wanda leaned closer to take a look and gasped. Yelena only snorted and excuse herself as she had an idea where this was going.
It was a footage of them, kissing, wrap up in each other's arms, lip tight in a passionate lock. Fuck, Katy Perry was right, Pictures of last night ended up online and they were screwed. "Y/n..." Natasha said warningly.
Without a second thought Y/n dashed away from the table with Pietro who zooms past him with his superspeed.
"I'll fucking kill you both!" Was Natasha's last word before hunting them down one by one.
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writingquestionsanswered · 7 months ago
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I find doing research pretty exhausting; so much reading, so much fact checking. Unfortunately, a good amount of my stories require research. How do I amend this?
Taking the "Overwhelm" Out of Research
When I wrote my third novel, I went into this exhaustive research mode. I bought books about my setting's inspiration locations, I sent away for travel guides and brochures from those locations (this was back before the internet is what it is now), I spent hours researching how to do things my character did for two sentences in the story. I even had an extensive list of trees and plants that grew around my protagonist's home, and the various uses of these plants.
At the end of the day, very little of that hard work actually went into my story. I didn't need to know everything there was to know about my inspiration locations in order to base my setting off of them. I didn't need to know all seventeen steps of a thing my character did two steps of in the story. I didn't need to know the medicinal uses of forty-two different plants and trees when my character only needed to use one...
My point is, if the research you're doing for your stories is exhausting you, you are almost certainly doing way, way more research than you need to. This is why I'm actually a huge proponent of doing only superficial research ahead of the first draft, then doing deeper research once the first draft is done. At the very, very least, waiting to do research until you have outlined each scene and know specifically what elements will actually make it into the story. That way you can focus your research on things that actually matter rather than pouring hours and hours of research into things that won't ultimately matter.
And with the exception of things that are plot-critical, you can generally save your fact-checking until after the first draft is written, or even until later revisions, because by the time you get there that fact may not even be in your story anymore.
If you still find yourself with an overwhelming amount of research, try breaking your research up into smaller, more relevant subjects. Like, instead of researching Victorian era botany because your character spends time in a plant-filled conservatory, try researching "Victorian era conservatories" to get a rundown of what they looked like, what plants were typically grown in them, etc. Or, instead of researching Victorian era medicine, research "Victorian era treatments for viral infections." This way you're boiling your research down to the thing that's relevant to your story rather than trying to learn everything about the broader subject.
I hope that helps!
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heygerald · 6 months ago
Text
Falling Without A Harness - Chapter 3
AU where Tom Ryder is still an asshole, just not a psychotic asshole. After their moment at the wrap party, Tom shows up at Parker's bookstore. How is it possible someone can be such an asshole when asking for a favor?
read the story here: prev / next
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Two weeks later finds the weather outside shifting with the first hint of autumn; cooler temperatures in the morning greet Parker when she walks to work, and the coffee shop next door has started advertising their new fall drinks of pumpkin spice and cinnamon tea. She's seen her brother every day since the wrap party—partly because he always makes a point of taking some down time after finishing a movie to recover from his stunts, and partly because her and Jody have become fast friends—but she hasn't seen Tom since their moment in the bathroom.
She suspects that's for the best. The internet is flooded with paparazzi photos of him flouncing around town with models every other day, and she's still trying to forget how natural it felt to laugh with him.
But despite her brother's newly open schedule, and Jody's constant pestering to go spend a day at the beach, Parker finds her bookstore just as empty as always.
There are a few stragglers here and there throughout the day. Sometimes she gets lucky when a tour bus stops for gas and snacks, allowing an ensemble of tacky dressed tourists to flood her street for twenty minutes. On unlucky days, Mr. Chamberlain will stop in to peruse her historical section; but he doesn't have any sort of schedule or income, and those visits consist entirely of him describing last night's CSI episode to Parker before trying to set her up with his grandson. Once he bought a book from her dollar bin. He attempted to return it three days later.
On days like today, Parker is visited by a sixteen-year-old named Melissa who hangs out every so often while her mom attends overpriced Pilates in the studio down the block.
"...and then Peter was all 'no, sorry Mandy, I'm not interested". Like, hello! My name is Melissa and we've lived in the same neighborhood since we were four," said teenager was droning on from her spot atop the upcycled reading chair in the corner. She never failed to impress Parker with how much she could talk—the stories quite literally never stopped coming—while at the same time she managed to read about four books a week. Parker suspected that Melissa's brain represented something like the Rainbow Road in Mario Kart, when the music got a little too fast and the turns were a little too hard to keep up with. "Now, I have no idea what I'm going to do. There's no one else for me to ask since it's three weeks away."
Parker, only half-listening to the story, hummed from her spot two rows back. She had won several boxes of books at a local auction about a month ago and had done a pretty good job at pretending they didn't exist.
Ignoring the problem only lasted so long, however, and this morning she had ended up spilling coffee all over herself when her sneaker caught the edge of the box. Pride—and knees—damaged, she decided to tackle the issue first thing in the morning.
It was now four in the afternoon, and the books were mocking her.
"Can't you just go alone?" she asked.
"Go alone? Are you crazy! That's, like, really sad, Park," Melissa explained. She couldn't see her, but Parker could feel the judgmental look the teen girl was giving her. "Only losers go alone to dances."
"Baby did it."
"Who?"
"Baby. You know? You don't put Baby in a corner? That one."
A tut. "You should really update your references."
"Jesus. Since when did Dirty Dancing become an outdated reference?" she muttered while inspecting the spine of a mystery novel from the 70s. It had definitely seen better days, and when she shifted it, three pages fell out. Parker tossed it into the TRASH box with a sigh. "Is going to a dance with your friends considered outdated too?"
"That's the same thing as going alone," Melissa groaned.
"How? You're literally not alone."
"Because if I go with my friends, that means that I couldn't get anyone that wasn't a friend to agree to go with me. I don't need the whole school thinking that I'm a total loser."
"I went with my friends and had a blast. And I'm not a loser."
There was no response other than silence, and after a few moments Parker realized that if Melissa had nothing to say about the subject, she likely had nothing nice to say.
She cleared her throat before moving onto the next, and final, box hoping that there would be better books in it. So far, her KEEP pile was looking pathetically small compared to what was about to be binned. With a forced change of conversation, she asked, "hey, you grew up here, right?"
"Sure."
"Did you know the Sawyers?"
"Like, Miss Sawyer? Down on Oakcrest?"
"The fancy old house with the bushes shaped like dogs. I bought a bunch of books at her estate sale, and so far, they all suck. I thought she was supposed to be a big collector or something."
The sound of Melissa humming echoed throughout the empty store, and Parker peeked around the bookshelves to spot the girl lying upside down on the chair; Doc Martens stuck up in the air, long ponytail hanging to the ground as she played on her phone.
Parker rolled her eyes.
"Yeah, totally. But she collected those kid's books. Original copies or whatever. Mom said she paid hundreds of thousands of dollars for some rabbit book."
"...Peter Rabbit?"
"I guess," Melissa shrugged. There was a loud smack of gum popping before her voice rang out, "she did a bunch of donations to local art musuems and galleries and stuff. A phila-something—"
"Philanthropist?"
"—and there was some big deal about her donating everything to some charity. Mom was talking about it. Which, like, good for them or whatever but I don't understand how donating an old book is helping solve world hunger."
Parker let her head drop against the beat-up cardboard box in front of her, something despondent and miserable sitting on her chest at the realization that she had wasted time and money on nothing but crap. "Well, I wish I knew that before I went into a bidding war over this garbage. Are the Hardy Boys still cool or is that dated too?"
A judgmental laugh floated back. "Um, their name is pronounced Hemsworth, Park."
"I meant—" she started, before realizing that this was a battle she was never going to win, and even if she wanted to try the musty smell resonating from these boxes of crap had burned through her daily allowance of braincells. Something Melissa didn't seem to worry about as she puffed from her vape pen. "Forget it."
Not so shockingly, Melissa did not, in fact, forget it. Instead, she spent the next ten minutes describing in scary detail each Hemsworth brother, their looks on a scale of one to ten, their best movies, and why Chris was the dreamiest of them all. His hair and eyes were a big selling point, apparently, and as Parker listened to the teenager drone on, she couldn't help but wonder if Chris Hemsworth used box dye too.
So wrapped up in her own world of book sorting, Parker didn't notice when the front door opened with a tinkle of the bell until the shop went eerily quiet. Melissa, it seemed, had finally found a reason to shut up.
"I never liked Chris all that much," Parker said as she slowly gathered the KEEP bin and hefted it off the floor. Her lower back ached at the strain. Jesus, maybe I am old. Moving towards the front counter, she continued musing, "There's something about him in the first Thor movie, when his eyebrows were all bleached, that kind of turned me off. I think there's a word for that, right? The ew or something...."
She spots Melissa first.
The girl is sitting upright in the chair now, face flushed a deep scarlet red with a book held tightly in her lap as she pretends to read through it. Her phone and vape are nowhere to be seen, and she doesn't so much as glance up when Parker strides by.
"What happened to you?" she asks with an amused quirk of the brow. Melissa doesn't respond, and Parker turns to set the heavy box of books on the front counter when she spots the other person in the room. "Oh, sorry. I was in the back. Can I help—?"
It shouldn't surprise her as much as it does, but Parker blinks to find Tom Ryder standing on the other side of the counter staring at her with raised brows.
Tom fucking Ryder.
He looks better than the last time she ran into him. He has a nice tan going underneath a funky pair of yellow sunglasses that are, in her opinion, too big for his face. They look a little absurd with the whitewashed denim jacket he's wearing, but the yellow matches the bedazzled t-shirt he has on underneath, so she suspects it's some sort of fashion statement. Paired with an expensive pair of well-polished boots, it all looks quite absurd standing in the middle of her dilapidated bookstore.
Even more so when Parker realizes she's wearing nothing but a pair of cheap cargo shorts and an oversized Twilight sweatshirt that was covering the coffee-stained shirt underneath. (Team Jacob, always).
"Tom. Um... are you looking for Colt or something?"
In typical Ryder fashion, he ignores her question entirely to do a slow spin; blue eyes tinted by his glasses trailing over everything in sight. She can feel the judgement from across the counter, and when he finally fixes his sights back on her, his smirk is rage inducing. "This is your store. Seriously?"
Parker promptly plants her hands onto her hips with a scathing glare.
"Ok, what do you want?"
"Jesus, no wonder this place is empty," he drawls, a pointed smile tossed towards Melissa's prone form as he leans an elbow onto the counter. At being noticed, the teenager ducks her head behind the spine of her book as if she had just been caught doing something she wasn't supposed to. "Do you talk to all your customers like that?"
"Just the assholes," she retorts. Over Tom's shoulder she catches Melissa's book dropping down two inches, and the girl's face is completely aghast.
What are you doing! she mouths, that's Tom Ryder!
Parker rolls her eyes. As if she didn't know who the blinged-out asshole standing in her store was. Speaking of—he's still standing there smirking at her. "That's you, if I wasn't clear. Don't let the door hit you on the way out."
Tom snorts. "I think I got that after the fifth time you said it."
"And yet..." she gestures vaguely to him, then to her store.
Because he's never behaved like a normal person, however, Tom doesn't seem to mind the insult or the offhand comment that she didn't want to deal with him. Instead, he smiles while his gaze drifts from judging the bookstore to judging Parker. He gives her a glance over—up, down, lingering on her oversized sweatshirt, before going back up—and finishes with a snort. "If the door hits me, I'm suing for damages, and I doubt you could afford the lawsuit. Let alone a lawyer."
God! What. a. fucking. asshole!
Parker bites back the insult knowing that it won't do any good. They've played this game before, and clearly being called an asshole seemed to have lost some of its bite over the weeks. So instead, she forcefully returns her attention to the cardboard box and slowly starts sorting the books into categories. "Fine. Can you just tell me what you want so I can get back to my life?"
He shifts against the counter and over the mustiness she catches a waft of his cologne when he grabs a book at random from her pile. "Why else do people come to a bookstore? I want a book."
Parker snorts. "Yeah, sure. Whatever. Seriously, what do you want?"
There's a moment of silence. She glances up to find him pointedly ignoring her as he flips through the book at random.
"You're... serious?"
He shrugs. "You said you have a bunch of sci-fi books."
"I'm surprised you even remember that given the whole," she sticks a finger into her mouth and mimes throwing up. He doesn't find it funny or cute and responds with a disgusted glare. Parker rolls her eyes with a shake of the head. "It was a—never mind. Why not order off of Amazon? I thought you said you've never even been to a bookstore before?"
This time, it's his turn to roll his eyes. He drops the book with a thwack before turning his attention to the overstuffed bookshelves at her left. At random, he starts ambling towards one. "You should be flattered that I picked your little store to start. Most people would kill to say that you know. Tom Ryder explores rundown bookstore in the shitty side of LA. If you had a picture, the paps would run it in every paper by tomorrow morning," he huffs.
"Yeah, I'll be sure to document this monumental occasion forever," she snarks, but follows after him anyway. His pattern is half-hearted; poking books here and there, glancing for hardly a second, before moving on. "And my store isn't rundown. It just has some... character."
He snorts over his shoulder. "That's what a Mom says when her daughter is ugly."
"Don't you go through PR training or something?" she scoffs as he diverts to a different aisle. "I can't imagine Gail would like to hear that particular opinion if I sold it to TMZ."
"Gail would sue you for everything you own," he laughed while flipping through an old copy of Gone with the Wind. Parker crosses her arms at him with a glare, and in response Tom flashes a too-white smile at her. "She freaked out about the mink rug, by the way. Was screaming and everything. It was hilarious."
Parker's heart stopped in her chest, but when there was no continuation of the joke—haha I can't wait to see you served with papers!—she furrowed her brows at him. "You didn't tell her it was my fault?"
A shrug as he shoved the book against her chest.
She huffed, turning the book over to check for damages, but when he turned his back... well, a part of her did wonder why he would keep that a secret if it was such a big deal. Was it to be nice? Or so he could hold it over her head indefinitely? Then again, if this was his attempt at blackmail, letting it go for two weeks seemed like the wrong way to go about it.
Deciding not to linger on unsolvable riddles, Parker returned the book to the end cap he had found it on and asked, "so, does this mean you've decided to audition for that sci-fi part after all?"
Her question went unanswered as Tom paused in front of the SEX & SEXUALITY section. He pulled a wrinkled copy of Fifty Shades of Grey off the shelf and waggled his brows at her pointedly. "Keeping the good stuff for yourself, huh?"
Parker responded by snagging the book out of his hand and stuffing it back into place. "You break it, you buy it applies here too, Ryder."
"Half this place is broken," he said with a pointed glance at the flickering overhead light. "I still can't believe you own this shithole."
"I happen to love this bookstore—"
"Oh, trust me, I can believe that you would own a bookstore," he said, and while there was nothing insulting about owning a bookstore on its own, the way that Tom spoke made it clear that owning a bookstore was not something he held in high regard. Then again, he spent all his time reading shitty scripts, so what would he know? "I just can't believe that you would own this bookstore. Like, you actually paid money for this place?"
"If you have to know, I used to be friends with the owner, and got a good deal on the property," she started to explain. He raised his brows at her while slowly perusing the RELIGION section, and Parker shook herself. She didn't need to explain anything to him of all people. The reminder helped her find some confidence, and she fluttered her hands at him irritably. "You know what—I don't need to explain myself to you. You've never even been to a bookstore before. What would you know about making sacrifices for something you believed in?"
Tom paused in his search. She saw his jaw clench, and eyes droop towards the creaky wooden floor beneath his shiny boots, and his comment from the other day drifted back to mind.
"You can be a real asshole sometimes, too, he had said.
And while guilt did block her throat up a bit—fucking asshole couldn't even let her defend herself without feeling bad about it—this time he didn't make any such reprimands. Instead, he just shrugged, before diving deeper into the store.
He cleared his throat. "I just expected it be nicer coming from you."
"Does something about me secretly scream rich girl to you?"
Tom harrumphed. "Trust me, no one is mistaking you for rich. Uptight, however..."
"Oh, ha, hilarious, Tom. God! You're such an asshole," she laughed, but it was a mean sound, paired with a mean insult. It failed to have the desired effect, however. In fact, Tom seemed to have shifted from hating the insult to owning it and looked far too amused for her liking. Frustrated, Parker decided the best plan of extermination was a straightforward shot. Through gritted teeth, she asked, "...what kind of sci-fi book do you want?"
The rhinestones on his shoulders sparkled as he shrugged. "I don't know. I need to understand what gets nerds so fucking excited about this shit. Not too nerdy, though. Alright? I'm not trying to be a Trekkie or whatever."
There were so many things wrong with that statement that Parker wasn't sure what to pick first. So, she pinched the bridge of her nose to point out, "I have a feeling the so-called nerds making up your potential fanbase aren't going to appreciate being talked about like that."
"Who's gonna tell them—you?" he asked with a derisive glance over.
It was definitely true what they said about Tom Ryder; his effect on women was instantaneous. Parker just doubted the tabloids were talking about migraines.
"The sci-fi section is on the right," she sighed while pushing past him. It was one of the larger sections she had; it hadn't been a lie to say the books weren't selling all that well despite being her favorite. "What have you read before?"
The blank look he gave her was response enough.
"Ah, right, maybe... Altered Carbon?"
"Isn't that a tv show?"
"Well, yeah, but it was a book first."
He glanced at the book in her hand, but clearly wasn't impressed. Leaning on the shelf, he said, "why the hell would I read that if I could just watch it?"
"Sound logic," she tutted with a narrow eyed look. Parker returned the book with an eyeroll. "Fahrenheit 451?"
"Read it in high school. Not impressed."
She trailed the shelf while muttering, listing books in her head before subconsciously crossing them off the list of something he was likely to read and enjoy. "I guess that means you wouldn't like The Illustrated Man or The Martian Chronicles," she said to herself.
His arm brushed her aside to pluck out a familiar novel. "Nerds love this," he said while already flipping through the pages. She was surprised the size didn't scare him off immediately.
"Nu-uh. No way," she shook her head.
"What?"
"Dune is not a starter book."
He furrowed his brows crossly. "You don't think I'm smart enough to read this shit or something?"
You shouldn't ask questions you don't want the answers to, her mother's voice echoed in the back of her head.
"Reading Dune as your first sci-fi book is like jumping straight into the deep end," she told him in a much more diplomatic approach. "If a sixteen year old wants to start drinking, you don't give him scotch, you give him a fruity cocktail."
Tom huffed; first through his nose and then through his mouth but stuffed the book back onto the shelf anyway. To which Parker then had to put it back on the correct shelf with a huff of her own.
"Don't be a baby and just trust me that Dune isn't a starter book. Okay?"
"Well—what is? You're supposed to be the expert here."
"If you weren't so picky it would be a lot easier..." she deadpanned but returned to her search anyway. Tom didn't seem to like waiting, and scowled at her as she shifted past him. She ignored him as best she could while squatting down to the lower shelves. "Arthur C. Clarke is one of the best sci-fi writers. He established a lot of rules that still exist in writing today. And films."
Parker pulled one of his novels, before moving towards Asimov, and then finally to Sagan. They were all slimmer novels than Dune, but no less complicated.
"Contact is my favorite," she said, shoving the books into Tom's arms. His denim was rough on her hands, and she tried not to think about how feverishly warm his skin had been the last time she had been this close to him. Swallowing, Parker remained on task. "But any of these should be good starter books for you to get into sci-fi with."
He glanced at the choices warily. "My audition is next week."
"Then I'm sure you'll have plenty of time to finish these if you're really serious about wanting to get that role," she chirped.
Together, they wound back towards the front counter. The TRASH boxes sat in the middle of the aisle, and she carefully toed them to the side before trailing past. While she was pretty sure he had been joking about suing her, a workplace hazard was the last thing she needed.
"How do you remember all of this?"
"Where stuff is? I spend almost all of my time arranging books. I'm uptight, remember?"
She felt more than saw his eyeroll. "These books, the authors. You, like, know everything about them."
Parker paused. It definitely wasn't a compliment, but it definitely felt like it could have been. Then again, this was Tom Ryder. When she glanced up from the counter, she found that he already has his nose back in his phone, and the conundrum of compliment versus not was thrown out the window. Parker shot him an unimpressed look to say, "please tell me that you're not on SparkNotes right now."
It was his turn to pause. "I'm just... reading the descriptions."
"Maybe that's why you can't understand why nerds like these books," she argued, hands planted firmly on her hips now. "Why would I go to watch one of your movies if I already looked the plot up on Wikipedia?"
He ignored her point entirely to smirk. "So, you do see my movies?"
"Goodbye, Tom."
"Relax. I'm not going to spoil them, alright? What's the fun in that when I could read them instead, and then leave you a bad review when the books end up being awful?"
"You mean have your assistants leave me a bad review."
He didn't seem impressed at the jab but didn't defend himself either. Most likely because they both knew she was right. Parker shot him a smug smile that he promptly rolled his eyes at. "Hilarious. Just tell me how much the books cost so I can leave before stepping on a rusty nail or something."
"Didn't you see the sign out front? Can't come in without a tetanus shot due to liability reasons."
There was a noise that sounded suspiciously like a laugh, but when she glanced up at him, Tom was wiping a hand down his face. "How much for the books, smartass?"
Parker was pretty sure she could upsell him. There was no way that he knew those three books, decades old with ripped pages, were only worth fifteen bucks together. And with all the Gucci name brand bullshit that he wore, she was pretty sure she could get away with telling him the price was a hundred dollars and he wouldn't even blink an eye.
But he was also a customer, a somewhat work acquaintance, and someone she really didn't want to hang around any longer than necessary. Not to mention her brother's pseudo boss, and someone that knew she was guilty of wrecking a far more expensive rug than she could ever pay to fix.
"Just consider them a loan," she said before she could second guess herself. When Tom raised his eyebrows so high they disappeared into his hairline, she waved a hand at him while half-heartedly returning to her job of book sorting. "If you're that put-off by it you can always pay me an agent's fee if you get the part."
He stared at her for a long moment, not necessarily computing, definitely hearing static, before Tom spared her an over-the-top eyeroll that surely had to have hurt to perform.
From his pocket he pulled out a couple of crumpled bills and slapped them onto the counter. He didn't even look at how much money it was. Just shook his head at her, glasses bobbing on his nose, before he was on his way out the door.
"Hey! Don't you want your change—?"
The door shut with a ting.
On the counter sat seventy-three dollars. Parker wasn't sure if she should be offended or complimented.
From outside there was the sound of an obnoxiously loud car engine revving, alongside the thrum of music, before it tore off down the street.
"What a fucking asshole," she grumbled with the shake of her head.
But it wasn't exactly an asshole thing to do, when she thought about it. And she would know; every exchange they had since being introduced had Tom acting like an asshole to her.
Or, well, not every exchange. Not when he had been, almost, nice to her at Gail's party, if only for a few moments when no one else was around.
"OH. MY. GOD!" a shrill voice shrieked across the store, bouncing off of bookshelves, as two boots went crashing towards the window. Parker was reminded in no gentle terms that they had not, in fact, been alone when Melissa smudged her face against the glass to peer out onto the street. "Holy shit! That was Tom Ryder! Tom Ryder! Are you kidding me right now? TOM. RYDER."
"Yeah, Jesus, I know who that was," she winced, pinching her ear when she thought the girl's high pitch yelp may have burst an eardrum. There was definitely a ringing as Melissa tromped around.
"You—he—I can't believe after all of this time you never once mentioned that you're friends with Tom freaking Ryder!" she squeaked.
"Well, hang on, we're not—"
"How long have you known him? How do you know him? Do you have his phone number? Ohmygod everyone is going to flip when I tell them that you know him. Tom Ryder!" Melissa shouted, phone already in hand as she started typing. "My friend, my dear friend and favorite bookstore owner, is best friends with Tom Ryder! Did you see his latest movie, Good Cop, Bad Dog? Ugh! He's so hot!"
"We're not friends," she said immediately, not even bothering to dispute the fact that Good Cop, Bad Dog was a puff piece in an attempt to market him for younger fans. "He's actually kind of an asshole."
The teenager shot Parker a scandalized look, mouth popped open into an O as her brows lifted to her hairline. "What? Are you kidding me right now? He just drove all the way out here to ask for your recommendation for a sci-fi book! His house is, like, fifty minutes from here with traffic. Don't call him that when you just became so cool."
Parker frowned. "How do you know where he lives?" she asked, before adding with much more intensity, "hang on a second, am I not cool?"
But Melissa was already moving on, the sound of facetime dialing on her phone as she darted back outside in hopes of catching another glimpse of the celebrity. Parker, in response, caught her head between her hands with a low groan.
And yet, she couldn't help but think about what Melissa said.
Tom Ryder was a total, grade-A asshole... right?
She cast a despondant glance towards the crumpled bills on the counter, then the box of books at her side, before fishing her phone out of her back pocket, and pressing the second number on speed dial.
"Hey," she said, "do you want to get, like, really drunk tonight?"
Colt didn't bother to ask why before he was checking what ingredients he had in his fridge and offering to invite Jody and Dan over for dinner. Sometimes, she really loved her brother.
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scenteddelusion5 · 9 months ago
Text
"Two households, both unalike in dignity, In our unsightly hell, where we lay our scene," PART 2
Vox x gn reader (Alastor's child)
Note: I learned how to do ť̷̛̠̝͐̀͗̈̎̐h̵̢͎̥͙̳͚͉̮̊̿̋͑̃͜͝ị̵͖͉̈́͂̾̽s̷̮͖͕̞͉̲̝̿̈́͗̿̏́̚͜͠
Also this is definitly going to be a 4 or 5 parter.
Word count: 3385
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5
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Y/n was sitting on their bed, looking at the surprisingly tin device in their hand. These smart phones looked so different compared to the phones in their time. Turning the thing on was a bit of a struggle, but thanks to Vox choosing the settings were easy and his phone number was already saved.
Hello Vox, this is Y/n. I hope you get this message.
The man on the receiving end hadn't read it yet, which they learned they could see bases on colour of the checkmarks, so instead they started exploring the unfamiliar tech a bit, mainly the internet. It wasn't invented yet when they were alive but with the amount of books they read, they were familiar with how it worked.
Y/n was looking up pictures of the TV Demon when a knock came from their door. "Little fawn, we need to talk." They swiftly hid the smartphone under their pillow.
Y/n sighed, "come in."
Alastor walked in and sat on the edge of the bed. "Fawn, I would first like to apologize for the way that I acted yesterday, it was unbecoming, however, I need you to understand that you can't trust Vox." His shadow grabbed one of their romance books and brought it to him. "He only wants to get close to you, to get to me and I don't want you to get hurt. Not only does he already have such a relation with his colleague Valentino but me and him have been in a long feud. You see..." Their father proceeded the tell them the same story Vox had.
"So that's why, I'm sorry this wasn't the novel worthy romance you hoped it was, but if you wished to meet new people, I would gladly take you out of the house sometime."
"Thanks for telling me dad." They put their head on his shoulder. "I forgive you... So where would we be going?"
"Hmm, that's a surprise. Put on something decent and come down for breakfast." Alastor stood up and left the room.
As soon as the door closed, Y/n reached for the phone. A message popped up from the screen.
God, I got to teach you how to text Anyway I was thinking There's this new restaurant opening up, want to go?
I see, Y/n thought, texting is very casual.
I would love too but my father is taking me out today to make up for yesterday. We could go tomorrow
Sure I'll see you at the edge of the forest
Y/n was casually dressed, their phone hidden in their jacket. Alastor and them were walking down a familiar street. "I've already been to Cannibal Town, you know that."
"Yes, yes, I know, little fawn. That isn't the surprise." Alastor waved them off.
The two made their way to Rosie's Emporium. Rosie was standing outside with a younger looking man standing next to her. He wore a brown waistcoat, matching pants and a bowtie. His eyes were pitch black like Rosie's.
"Alastor! You really kept us waiting!" Rosie laughed. "And here I thought you were a gentleman."
"Yes, yes, we took a bit longer. Anyway speaking of gentleman, Y/n, meet Paris." Alastor pushed the man in front of them. "He's a young, stand-up, cannibal demon. I thought that you surely didn't want to explore the rest of hell with your old man, so I asked Paris here to go instead."
"It's an honour to meet you." Paris kissed Y/n on the hand. "I would love to show you around the rest of hell."
"Uhm... I..." Y/n looked between him and their father. "Sure, let's go," they sighed.
Alastor and Rosie watched the two leave. "Once they've spend their day with him, Y/n'll forget all about Vox. Now come inside. I've got a new shipment of livers." Rosie invited her old friend inside.
Vox was still removing the thorns and branches from his favourite suit when Velvette entered his room.
"Wait, so you did go after them?!" She pulled one of the branches out of his hat. "You're sooo whipped. Did you find some dirt on Alastor?"
"No, I didn't." Vox stood up and straightened his suit. "But I do need to prepare for tomorrow."
"No-" Velvette jumped onto him and held his screen between her hands. "- you have a DATE!!! OMG, you two should totally get married, could you imagine the Radio Demon's face. Hahaha." She pulled up her phone and started typing something in google. "So where are you taking them? What are you wearing?"
"We're going to that new restaurant and I'm wearing my usual suit." He pulled away from the other Vee.
"You're not wearing your work clothes. Follow me, we're going shopping."
"So yeah that was the first time I had ever eaten a human heart, it was quite experience, hahaha." Paris was rambling on and on. "Rosie had introduced me to your father, he seemed have approved of me. I, mean, that's crazy, he is THE Radio Demon and all... Oh, have I already told you about my cooking? I-"
The whole time this demon had been talking about himself, oh and the Radio Demon of course. Paris seemed to idolize him, which only put Y/n off more. At least they got to see the rest of hell. The two were walking down the road, a unfamiliar city standing in the distance.
"We should go the other direction." Paris was about to walk the other way.
"Why?
"Oh that's like, uhm, the three Vees territory. It's not a place to take a fair maiden to."
"Dad told you to show me around hell and I want to go there." They continued to walk to the city and it's flashy lights. "Are you coming or am I going alone?"
The two were heading towards the shopping centre. The whole way Paris was trying to convince them to go back. But Y/n was stubborn.
"This really isn't a place for civilized people as you can see, I can show you around another circle in hell." As Paris was talking, they walked up to a window.
The shop window showed a total of ten TV's. Vox 2 Night was on. He looked so handsome in his suit talking about VoxTech's newest invention. They were immediately pulled away from their conversation with the cannibal and lovingly stared at the demon on the broadcast.
"Hey, Y/n." That wasn't Paris' voice.
"Velvette, why are we going to the mall when you can just conjure an outfit for me?" Vox asked.
Velvette pulled up her Sinstagram and showed it to Vox. "Because it's part of the EXPERIANCE, just look. Shopping pics are all over everyone's for-you-page and if we say we're preparing you for a date, we'll totally go viral."
"That's no, we're not telling anyone I'm going on a date." Vox grabbed her phone out of her hands. "Who knows how Val will do when he finds out. No, nope."
"But-"
"No!" Vox's screen zoomed in on his left eye, black circles spiralled in it. As he was using his hypnotising powers, he caught sight of a familiar figure standing in the distance.
"Fine," Velvette sighed, "but at lea-"
But Vox wasn't paying attention to his colleague again. He was walking to the person standing in front of one of his techshops. They were intently watching his night show. Their eyes sparkled.
"Hey, Y/n," he greeted them.
"Vox! What are you doing here?" Y/n's face immediately brightened seeing the TV Demon.
"Hello, I'm Paris." The demon stepped in between the two lovebirds. "Is there something I can help you with?"
"Yes, you can fuck off." Vox pushed past him.
Y/n, me and Vox were just about to go shopping. Do you want to come with?" Velvette asked.
"I would love to." They pushed a hairlock behind their ear.
"Another time, I was showing Y/n around and we were just on our way to doomsday district." Paris butted in again. "Besides, aren't you and the Radio Demon rivals? It's highly inappropriate for someone who has not been approved by their father to be around them."
"And I don't think a wannabe, cannibal who doesn't know his place is worthy of being seen with them." Vox retorted. "So Y/n, what do you think?"
"I would love to go shopping with you!" They turned to the other cannibal. "I'm going to hang out with them, you can either come with or leave us alone."
"But-" Before Paris could make another objection, Y/n dragged the overlord by the arm to the shopping centre.
"So what's up with hollow eyes over there?" Velvette asked as Vox and Paris were fighting about a suit or something.
"Oh yeah," Y/n's nervous laugh filled the room, "dad wanted him to come with me while going out, I've never been here before. I didn't really get a choice in the matter."
"Hmm, don't worry. I got ya!!" Velvette walked up to the bickering boys. "Hey, Paris! I saw this polo that would suit you. Come on." She winked at her colleague while pulling him away.
"I never realised Velvette's taste is stuck-up bitchass," Vox murmured.
Y/n linked their arm around the TV's. "It isn't, that's why we should make a run for it now before she gets sick of him."
The mall was giant, every corner held a store a different store. The two were looking around a souvenir store.
"How about this?" Y/n asked as they held up a keychain of a hung rat.
"That's disgusting, wh- HEY HEY!!" Vox screamed as they held the dead animal close to his face. "Stop it!"
"Fine..." Y/n took a step back. "Hey, how do your hypnosis powers work? I know you use them for your shows, but I didn't sense anything at all."
"Indirect hypnosis isn't as strong as direct. My shows only work on lowly denizens, so you have nothing to worry about in that regard." Vox looked at the snow globes decorated with death animals.
"And direct."
Vox looked away from them. "I could make you do anything I wanted but I'm not going to do that. I like you just the way you are."
His words shot straight through their heart. "Stop saying corny stuff like that." A red blush decorated their face.
"But I love your reactions, sweetie."
"Stop."
"Sweetheart."
"Vox..."
"My love~"
"VOX!" Their face was brighter than Alastor's hair. "S̴̹͎͗̈́͂̏͛̈̿͝͝T̸̡̛̼̥͓͖͂͛́̒̈́̄̀͛̏̔͒̎̌̕͝͝O̵̧̖̖͍͕͔͈͂̈́͑̅P̸̢̥̝̦͎̂̌̽ Ȉ̴̟̗̗̗̖̟̞͍̙͊͑̐̋̂̀̆̋T̵̺͉͔̮̺̩̔͌̽͊̔̍̆̿́̔̇̇͘." Their ears fell back, eyes glowed and their teeth got sharper.
Vox was stunned by this reaction, they were terrifying yes, but they were also kind of cute? Pixel hearts floated across his screen. "Wow, you're so hot."
"I, I- uhm, you're handsome too." They twirled a hairlock around their finger.
...
...
"So." Vox broke the awkward silence. "How is that phone suiting you?"
"Oh." They pulled the little device out of their pocket. "Yeah, I'm still figuring out what the apps are all about but I think I understand the chatting and goulgle." They opened their phone and showed it to him
"You still have the standard VoxTech background?" Vox asked.
"You can change it?"
"Yes." Vox grabbed their phone and posed for a selfie. Y/n, not completely understanding what's going on, copied him. "Wait," the overlord said as he was focused on their phone, "here."
He showed them their new background; a picture of the both of them smiling, Y/n looking straight into the camera and Vox glancing lovingly to them, a edited in, glowing heart surrounding the both of them.
"That's so cute!" They stared at the picture now decorating the background of their little picture device.
"I also downloaded 666+ for you along with a free account. you can watch any 666 show on there."
"Even your shows?" Their eyes sparkled.
"Of course." Vox was definitely going to download that image of them to his hard drive once he got home. "Anyway, let's leave. I don't think we're going to buy something here."
"Velvette? Where did Y/n go?" Paris asked.
"I don't know," she answered, "oh look at this shirt." She held up a striped polo.
"I promised their dad I would look after them. Oh, if the Radio Demon finds out I lost them, he's going to hate me!" The cannibal started to panic. "No, I should go to him, if I tell him in time maybe he won't kill me."
"Relax." She rolled her eyes. "Let's go find them, they couldn't have gone far. Besides what would the Radio Demon say if you left them lost and alone now?"
"Right, yeah right." Paris started searching throughout the entire shopping mall.
Vox! I can't keep distracting this guy He's dead set on finding them
We'll come Meet you at the restrooms on the Westside
"Hey! Paris, I know where they are!" She yelled at the still freaked out man.
"Right, lead the way!"
When they arrived, Vox and Y/n were already there.
Paris rushed up to them. "Y/n are you alright? You're not hurt are you? What would your father say if he knew you ran off?"
"I don't care what he would say. I'm my own person." They retorted and then turned to Velvette. "Are you hungry too? Me and Vox wanted to go get some food."
"Sure, I could use a snack."
Paris' face brightened. "I know this great restaurant close by that I just know you would love." He tried to hide his smirk when they agreed to go there.
The restaurant looked nice enough but there didn't seem many people inside. But that also meant they got a table of four immediately. The inside was decorated with abstract paintings and decorative, animal skeletons.
"I've never been in this place. It's rather nice." Vox studied a squirl skull. He couldn't understand why Paris was looking so smug. The waiter passed around the menu and left again. Even the staff was polite, what was going on? But when he opened the menu, it clicked...
It was a cannibal restaurant.
Vox was about to protest when Y/n spoke up. "Oehhh, I didn't think they had places like this outside of Cannibal Town. They even have my favourite!"
He looked over the menu again, looking for anything he could possibly stomach. There weren't any vegan options... shit. This was going to be a loooong lunch.
Velvette shot a concerned look at Vox, when the waiter came back. "Have you made a decision?"
"Yes, I'll have the legbeef, medium rare, and the lady will have the smoked heart." Paris ordered for the two of them.
"Uhm-" Vox glitched, hastily trying to make a decision. I'll have the smoked heart too." It was their favourite dish, he should've at least tried it once.
Velvette was still in utter shock that her colleague was going along with this. "I'll have the uhm... Liver bolognaise." She quickly chose the least horrible sounding dish, at least there would be a shit ton of cheese and sauce on it. The girl still couldn’t believe she was doing this and for Vox of all people!!!
The dinner went fairly well all things considered. Velvette barely touched her dish, while Vox did take a full bite and it didn't taste as bad as he'd expected, actually it tasted great! But knowing he was eating an actual demon spoiled the dish for him. Still, he finished it.
After lunch the group split up again, Paris and Y/n going back to Cannibal Town while Vox and Velvette went back to the V-tower.
Alastor had brought some of his daughters romance books to Rosie, one of them laying open on the table. He wanted to at least try to understand what got Y/n so hung up about Vox and romance.
"So, they basically get threatened and stalked by this vampire and they fall in love with him? I can't believe Y/n has been reading this nonsense." Alastor rolled his eyes and reached out for the next novel. "And this one, to get over her heartbreak, a young demoness writes heartfelt letters, confessing her love for the sinners, never intending to send them. However, when she opens her box one morning she finds all her letters gone, send out. How will she deal with the 5 denizens she accidentally confessed to? Is this supposed to be interesting, I don't get it."
"Come on, Alastor. You want to bond more with her, right? This is part of it." Rosie picked up one of the books to and reads the back. "This one doesn't seem too bad, it's about the love between two demons who look back on their living years as young champs."
"Ugh," the Radio Demon complained. "Luckily I don't need to worry about them and Vox anymore. I must say that Paris boy is quite the charming man, a perfect addition to our home, tell me how did you find him?"
"Oh, Paris is a BIG fan of yours and came to Cannibal Town in the hopes to meet you. For the last few months he has been admired by ALL the ladies in town. Dapper, charming, smart, looks, he got it all as they say, " Rosie laughed, "so when I heard your little conundrum I just knew he was going to be perfect for them."
"Yes, he would make quite the son-in-law but we'll have to see how the date went first." Alastor almost spit out his coffee when he read the backside of the next book; an older Cannibal and younger tech demon falling in love despite being from rivalling families. Was this were Y/n got the idea of falling in love with vox? "Seems like I'll have to have a talk with y/n about fiction and reality."
When Velvette and Vox got back, the last Vee was waiting on them. "Did you two go out without me? You're hurting my feelings."
"Oh, fuck off Val, we just went out for a new suit." She held up her middle finger as she left for her department.
"Oh really?" Val asked, "you went out for a new suit? And you weren't with that whore?" He held up his phone showing Sinstagram. A blurry picture of Vox and Y/n could be seen.
"Yes, I was buying a new suit Valentino, we just ran into them is all." Vox tried to keep back his blush. "Besides, what do you care?"
His colleague's answer infuriated him. "What do I care? Since you met that useless whore, you've kept me dry."
"Not everything is about sex and I highly doubt you're dry, you've got enough playthings." Vox walked towards the elevator. "You don't need me, get over it."
The elevator doors closed again, leaving Valentino all alone. "That fucking doe-eyed BITCH!! I'm going to kill them! Kill their whole fucking family!!!" He grabbed a glass from his assistant and threw it against de wall. "But I'm going to start with them..."
"It's unfortunate our date was interrupted by those two, but no matter we could always meet again," Paris spoke as the two of them were on their way back to Cannibal Town. "I am free this wee-"
"Wait!" They yelled. "This was supposed to be a date?"
"Well, yes."
"No, not happening! Listen up, I am in no way shape or form, interested in you that way!"
"Hmm, I see, what a shame." Paris put on a seemingly fake frown. "You know I was going to keep quiet about Vox and you but it seems like I'm more devoted to the Radio Demon. I wonder how he is going to react... What he'll do to that bastard... Oh well."
"What? I... Please don't tell dad!" Y/n begged.
"Hmm, how about this, I keep quiet about your little rendezvous, your affair, and you become my girlfriend."
"I... Uhmm..."
"How about this I'll give you two days to think about it." The cannibal put on an atrocious smile. "Choose wisely, or you might never see Vox ever again."
"There is my favourite demon." Alastor patted their head. "Did you have a good time, little fawn?"
"Yes, I did. It was great." Y/n smiled widely, doing their absolute best to hide their nervousness.
"That's amazing dear." Their father turned to Paris. "Thank you, I hope you will show them around some more another time."
"I would love to sir!"
Part 3
I'm an unoriginal ass. I know, I know, <3
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JK here's part 3
Masterlist/request guidelines
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trungles · 2 years ago
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Hello, long time follower just on other platforms and I love your work. I am currently getting my Masters in Comics and Graphic Novels, and do tell me if this an inappropriate question but how much do you make? Like a month doing comics and art? Also what do you do on a day to day basis? I'm worried about my future after I graduate.
Thank you so much! This is a great question, and I wish more people would be candid about answering it because I'd like creators to demand more money. This will be a very long post! Keep reading if you're interested. MASSIVE info dump below.
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I think earnings in comics and books can look wildly different for almost every creator, and it depends on a lot of things. With that in mind, I make a slightly different amount every year. I view my finances mostly through page rates, contracted projects, and passive-ish income. Because I'm terrible at math, I'm just going to tell you how much I make per contracted projects, plus some relevant information in terms of Life Stuff. This will be very long, and I will highlight some important details that people maybe don't like to talk about very much.
Please also bear in mind that I live in Minnesota, away from all my major publishers and editors who are situated on the coasts, so my cost of living is much more manageable.
Background: Building a Foundation (2012-2018)
I graduated from college in 2012 and lived with my parents until 2018. I did not have to pay rent or worry about food, so I got to save up a lot of money to invest in developing as an artist–paying for printing zines, making merch, travel to conventions, table costs, and secure hotel accommodations. This helped enormously, and I would not have been able to spend six years developing my portfolio and connecting with comics peers and professionals without my parents. They were very supportive, even if they had no idea that I was developing professionally as an artist (LOL, they're very proud of me now, but they truly just thought I was being a weird internet gremlin the whole time). They're also not wealthy people by any means. My parents immigrated to the US in their 20s as refugees with absolutely no money and one baby (it me, I am the baby), but they each became pretty successful small-business owners in their own right and were able to help put me through school with minimal debt, even through the financial crisis in the late aughts.
I started making art in 2012-ish as well, but only semi-professionally, and barely on purpose. I was employed full-time in a non-art job between 2013 and 2018 at a local non-profit that specialized in pediatric therapy. I occupied a role as their front office person/corporate assistant. I made about 40k a year at that job, with benefits, and I made a negligible amount of money doing art and making comics. I should also note that throughout this time, I was working 40 hours a week at my day job, commuting between 2-4 hours a day depending on the weather (my commute was an hour for each direction in good weather and up to three hours if it snowed), and then working on comics for 3-4 hours in the evening, every evening. This meant that I would frequently be working anywhere between 65-85 hours a week for five years, and I do not recommend this! I burned out pretty bad! I didn't go to art school or learn about comics, either, so I felt like I had to spend time building my portfolio to make up for lost time. I didn't even know I wanted to make comics until maybe two years after I graduated from undergrad.
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I did manage to build a nice portfolio and connect with people who were making the sort of work I liked to make, so the portfolio-building did help. I posted regularly online in different platforms and steadily grew an audience over the years via Tumblr (heyyy!) Instagram (which I personally loathe), Patreon (stressful, but necessary and also getting more comfortable to use!), and Twitter (which I have very mixed feelings about, but I'll miss it if it dies). I did a few short comics with writers whose work I admired. The Fresh Romance Anthology in 2015 was my first major published work, and it was with writer Marguerite Bennett, who remains one of my absolute favorite people. I was so inexperienced at the time, and she would check in with me to make sure I got paid for my work, and then she would follow up with everyone responsible if I was not properly compensated. Not everybody is this on-the-ball about making sure their colleagues are treated well, and she absolutely set the bar for me going forward.
Doing It For Real + Some Numbers (2018-2021)
In 2018, I put together a pitch document for The Magic Fish (if you'd like to see my pitch document, here is a Dropbox link to it! It's just a book report for a book that doesn't exist yet, and I hope you find it helpful if you need it), shopped around for an agent, and found one I'm very happy with (Kate McKean at Morhaim! She's amazing! She runs a newsletter where she gives you the lowdown on how the publishing industry works, so if you're interested in Books, you can check out her writing over at Agents and Books). Then my agent shopped the pitch around to editors and publishers, and Random House Graphic won out. Also, every time she negotiates a contract for me in my home market (the US), she gets 15% cut, which is entirely worth it to me. She does so much. It's incredible.
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Random House Graphic's offer wound up being for two books at $45k each, with pretty standard royalty rates, I think around 10% in general, though there are stipulations around royalties that I can't remember off the top of my head (and also bear in mind that you do not earn royalties until your book sales have earned out your advance, and not all published books earn out). To me, this is a lot of money! BUT the graphic novel took two full years to make, so that $45k needed to last me until 2020, which is not livable if you're on you're own. Also, the advance is paid out in chunks at certain milestones of project completion. I'd get a few thousand at a time for the script, another few for the thumbnails, more for the inks, and on and on until the book is done. I would not start to get paid for the second book until I started working on it.
Earlier in 2018, I'd moved in with my partner, so we managed paying the bills and groceries together. Luckily for me, I had also completed a full tarot deck as a separate personal art project to help build my confidence as an illustrator, and my agent sold the tarot deck project (The Star Spinner Tarot) to a different publisher for a $15k advance, so I had some extra wiggle room in 2018. I quit my day job because this was a rare instance in which a book deal provided me with enough money to live on making art, with the caveat that I shared financial responsibilities with my partner. By this time, my Patreon, which I started back in 2015 I think, was also earning anywhere between $800-$1000 a month, which was really great semi-passive income. I'd post process shots and WIPs a couple times a week, and that really helped from month to month.
In 2020, The Magic Fish was published and got a lot of really lovely press. It debuted on the Indie Best-Seller list, and it got pretty popular in schools and libraries. Suddenly, my responsibilities expanded to also being a public speaker (side note: if you make a book about topics of some academic interest, make a generic powerpoint presentation about it now! I'm so serious!). I stopped tabling at conventions (the pandemic), but I would also be paid for speaking gigs in between. I'm not an enormously in-demand public speaker, so I usually asked for an honorarium of about $500 from schools and institutions for online appearances, though I'm about to ask for a lot more because it's cutting into a lot of the time I need to make comics and hit my deadlines. As people are more comfortable meeting in person, I usually ask for a speaking fee of at least $1500, and it must be after they've already taken care of my travel and accommodations. I'm not very well versed in the standards for speaking fees for debut authors, so this might not be standard! It's just my best estimation of the value of my time and effort for that instance.
Speaking of comics and deadlines, I sometimes take on smaller projects for DC (you might have seen these) and Marvel (shhh it's not been announced yet), and the page rates for those, as they've paid me, are usually as follows: $90 per page for writing ($45 for plotting and $45 for scripting), $160 for pencils per page, and $90 for inking per page. I've never colored or lettered, so I don't know those rates. I do regularly talk to other writers and artists, and the rates for writers are all over the place and seem to depend on whether you've signed an exclusive contract with either of those companies. I don't know what a contracted penciller or inker is paid by them, or if that's even a thing that happens? I also sometimes do comics cover work, and I usually charge between $1200 and $1500. I tend to charge a bit more for covers these days because I personally don't like doing covers all that much.
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Starting to Reap the Benefits Maybe? (2021-2022)
In 2021, I started getting royalty checks for both Star Spinner Tarot and The Magic Fish. These payments will vary wildly, and I think they will naturally peter off as time goes on, and I'll need to make more books and projects. In both cases, I was surprised. I think at one point a random check hit my bank account for like $20k and I nearly fainted, but some of the other royalty checks will be much more modest. This process of getting paid is also immensely eased by having a good agent! I cannot stress this enough!
Then both the Star Spinner Tarot and The Magic Fish got foreign language licenses, and those come with small advances of their own, each between $2k and $3k, from what I can recall, with varying royalty rates depending on the publisher who acquired those rights. Those royalty rates are, in my limited experience, more modest than my American publisher's, come to around 7% or 8%. The Star Spinner Tarot got an official French edition, and The Magic Fish has been licensed for publication in Italian, French, Korean, Brazilian Portuguese, and Spanish so far.
Since 2021, I've also signed on to draw two more graphic novels for other people, and my agent is able to demand higher advances for me, even when I'm only doing the drawing part.
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My Day-to-Day
I think that's about as comprehensive as I can be about numbers. On a daily basis, my schedule depends on whether I'm writing or drawing. Graphic novels are long projects. I'll be writing for months at a time and then drawing for even more months or even years after. I spend a lot of time answering emails for speaking requests, and my agent will sometimes pass along emails about legitimate project requests (another advantage of having an agent is I don't have to sift through scam emails or shady collaborators). I spend way more time answering emails and trying to iron out my calendar than I'd like.
I'm currently working on my second graphic novel for Random House Graphic, and I'm extremely excited about it.
Another thing I've learned is that I like to bounce between projects, but they have to be between a paid project and a personal project. If I'm juggling paid projects, I get overwhelmed and stressed. If I can work on a paid project and then also make personal art, I can feel some relief and maintain a positive relationship with my work. If you can ever get to a point where you can manage to do this, I highly recommend it. I never want to hate making comics, and this balance of personal-to-paid projects helps me keep loving the work.
Closing Thoughts
My only hesitation in talking candidly about all this is that I'm not sure my professional trajectory is applicable for most people. I think I've had a uniquely positive experience once I got off the ground, and I know most people's journeys are very much not this smooth. In a lot of ways, I got very lucky. And along the way I had help, especially before I got my foot firmly in the door. I don't think I make stratospherically high amounts of money, but I know this is still an atypically stable amount for a lot of artists and authors. And even so, I anticipate that some years will be better or worse than others.
Obviously, I couldn’t cover absolutely everything, but my hope is that this will be a good starting point for you to figure out what you need to plan for the future. Best of luck! Thank you for your question! I’m sorry it’s so long.
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habbohoteldotdk · 1 month ago
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When I was still deeply addicted to the Internet to the point I'd cycle through weird extremist sites that called for the death of people who look like me, news websites, and regular social media all at the same time, spending upwards of 12 hours a day on them (to the point the sensation of holding my phone in my hand still felt tangible even when I wasn't using it), I knew it wasn't "right" and that one day I'd figure out how to stop. I postponed that decision to the distant future. I hyped myself up by reading posts on r/nosurf made by people who succesfully stopped using the Internet in a problematic way (and by problematic use, I mean intending to check a website for only 10 minutes and realizing that two hours have passed and you've since forgotten what you were initially looking for), I read books that aimed to help the reader defeat their addiction, I read quotes, I watched videos, I was looking for anything outside of myself that would somehow magically pull me out of my addiction. I assumed it was like a switch that could be turned on and off.
It took years for me to gradually reduce my usage. I realized the change happened mostly because my feelings around the Internet changed. When I was a kid, it was a place to play games and have fun (I would cycle through YouTube, Minecraft forums, browser games) and even when I had my first phone (at 12) I'd never bring it with me to school.
That belief I had about the Internet remained with me as I aged but my world expanded. Internet meant having social media. Internet meant reading the news. Internet meant talking to extremists online. Internet meant watching gore videos. Internet meant knowing a school shooting just happened on the other side of the planet... but it was simultaneously still a place 'to play games and have fun', but that function lessened to make room for all the things I enumerated earlier. So... the Internet back then was still as addictive as it is today, but the introduction of these novel things into my Internet experience turned it into an even bigger time sink.
Going back to the point I was making, my screen time reduced because while I was hyping myself up throughout those years, telling myself "this is definitely the year where I'll stop scrollllllllingggg", making up these elaborate logical reasons as to why I should quit browsing X or Y website, my emotions/feelings about the online world subconsciously followed suit, because change mostly comes from emotion. Even if it may not seem like much, all those days added up (some of these days where I've wasted my entire evening scrolling past stuff I cannot remember anymore, others where I didn't go past the 3 hour mark according to my phone's screen time monitor) and there's absolutely no desire for me to waste hours on some random sites anymore. Changing is akin to turning a cube into a sphere with fine grit sandpaper, every day you work towards it, and only in time you will see the change.
But when I first started trying to get a bit more control over my addiction I thought life operated like a cartoon where I strike a chisel against marble once and it collapses into a perfect Adonis. I spent all day looking for the right spot to strike to perfectly and effortlessly change instead of actually making changes (as explained above, in my case I was compiling resources like this one [video], this one [video] and this one [long-form article], re-reading them over and over again as if they'd instantly rewire my brain and bring about new changes in my life).
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beka-tiddalik · 5 days ago
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When I was 14 I started spending time on the Internet.
I found some websites that I didn't want anything to do with.
I found some I was fascinated with.
I found communities.
Some of them were toxic.
Some of them I needed to spend time in to learn what toxicity is.
Back then the Internet safety talk was: Be Anonymous. Don't give out Details. Don't go to meetups. If you Must go to meetups, ensure they're in a public place and bring a friend.
Anyone could be anyone on the Internet. It was a warning and a draw.
I spent a lot of time lying about my age and my location. I'd been forging notes from my parents to say I was allowed to read mature books since I was 12 and I didn't see how this was different. (In some ways it wasn't). Usually I lied about my age to hide that I was a kid to stay under the radar. Sometimes I lied to get access to information or stories.
Sometimes I lied about my gender. The Internet in the 00s had a pretty aggressive anti-woman culture in some places. I still remember the first time I showed up on a forum (which was all text based by the way) and said I was a girl and the immediate all-caps response from multiple users was SHOW US YOUR TITS.
I was a bit shocked but mostly bewildered. Why though, was my main thought. Why bother?
Was I safe? Not from new information that i was sometimes a but young for. Not from assholes.
But physically? Yeah. Because I never put my photos up where strangers could find them, and I kept all my location and age details to myself. Because when I found myself in situations that were uncomfortable I'd just click out.
I have some places now on the Internet where I've put my real image and real name down, but I don't do that more than I have to. Fandom stuff and any controversial opinion is kept strictly separate and under pseudonyms. I have good reasons for this that have changed over the years.
If I have any advice to offer to young people on the Internet these days, it's to curate your own experiences. Don't let algorithms pick what you look at. Follow your interests, try new things, talk to new people.
And if a space stops bringing you joy, take a break. If you don't miss it, then delete your account and explain nothing.
Next year in Australia it'll be illegal for anyone under 16 to be hosted on most social media platforms.
Age barriers aren't new so it'll be interesting to see how this changes things.
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jmdbjk · 1 year ago
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My head is spinning...
Let's spend the next two weeks (or however long) arguing about who, what, when, where, when we could be enjoying content or music.
Yes, it's all over the news media and social media: RM, V, Jimin and Jungkook will enlist December 11 and 12.
Buzzwords being used: companion enlistment and battalion, company, barracks, training center... etc.
The more information is reposted and quoted, the more it gets twisted because words get left out, translations aren't clear and people generally misinterpret what they are reading because most social media posts are not complete sentences (omg the internet is ruining language writing and reading comprehension skills).
The initial report was RM and V would be going to a training center together (or at least at the same time/same date) in the "rear" and Jimin and Jungkook were going to one on the "front" and this base is organized so that it is considered on the "frontline." The initial report implied all 4 would be at the same location, 2 going to the front training center, 2 going to the rear training center.
Then reports began to surface that Jimin and Jungkook had chosen "companion enlistment." Which is a thing and they very well could have done. Siblings, relatives, friends, can request this but only for those whose birthday is 1995 or after.
After all of that, somehow, now we have Jimin and Jungkook going to the training center where Jin is located. Which may or may not be true.
You might even start seeing stuff about men with tattoos that are visible if they wore a singlet (tank top) or short pants are not eligible for training instructor assistant positions and therefore that's why they chose companion enlistment. (??!! eh?) That one is all over the place, I'm not sure what the accurate explanation is.
It's a frenzy of confusion. We don't know for sure. We won't know for sure until the day of, when I'm POSITIVE the media will be camped out along the roads into those military boot camp facilities with their cameras set up on tripods waiting for the black KIA Carnivals to show up.
Just me typing this and posting it will add to the never-ending confusion. I would rather talk about Jungkook explaining how the buttons failed him onstage during Fake Love or the quantity of naked Jimin we've seen in the last few days...
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One thing I will say with conviction is that they were committed to this plan. They tried to tell us that. They did their best to remind us that 2025 was the target. Yes, they had some things to wrap up, some important things to finalize this year and some stuff that was hard to pin down. But in their minds and on paper, they had the general plan.
And I will also say that when they are all discharged, they will hit the ground running. They didn't do all of this extensive planning to be discharged and sit on their ass for a while to get used to being a civilian again. They're gonna kick ass as soon as they land, shoot some footage for an MV and get the show on the road.
Next year (which is a month away) there will be a ramp up when its time for Jin to be back with us, then Hobi, and then we'll be on the downhill side of all of this enlistment business and the wheels will start turning to get us all whipped up again. Stadiums will have been booked years in advance (as we speak they are being booked). They've got this plan in motion already.
All that being said, I hope our men do well, stay healthy, safe and without drama until June 2025 when they will be discharged from active military duty.
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armpirate · 7 months ago
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Soundleasure | Choi San || CH. 13
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Pairings: Soft!San x fem!reader || Strangers to lovers, fake dating
Genre: smut, angst, fluff, online sex, ghosting
Warnings: inexperienced!San, fem!reader, masturbation, online sex, camboy, first times.
Summary: You can do whatever you please and be whoever you want on the Internet. And San knew that a little bit too well.
After finally following all the signs the universe was throwing at him, he started living a double life that no one was aware of. Everyone in his daily life knew him as Choi San, the reserved and quiet boy who wouldn't raise his voice, and would barely communicate with anyone outside of his comfort group. But only a few knew him as Soundleasure, the man with a sexy voice and a filthy mind that had their toes curling just with his narrations.
He never thought of the possibility of those two lives ever meeting, he had always tried for them to follow a parallel route and had always played safe to keep his friends from ever suspecting that side even existed. But his plans will start to crumble when he gets a little too close with one of his subscribers and she invades his real-self and altergo's universes without being able to stop it.
Y/n will not only help him to keep his secret from his circle, but will also show him there's more of Soundleasure in him than he'd like to admit. 
Previous || Next
MASTERLIST
Aprox. time of reading: 15 minutes
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The space in that big elevator seemed to decrease with every minute he spent there, and Y/n turning to him every few seconds wasn't of help at all. It just made him wish he had somewhere else to look so it wasn't so evident that his eyes wanted to be on her.
When Y/n first suggested going to her place the next day, he didn't think he was going to put himself in such a delicate situation where he'd have to fight his own instincts of looking even more nervous.
As she drove through Downtown Boston, San could only guess which one of all the high-rise buildings was the one she lived in. It only made sense for him to be that way. She was a woman that could afford spending four hundred dollars in just an outfit, and the same one who was driving the newest Audi model in the market. But, for some reason, he was still surprised when she opened the big door to her apartment and he was able to see her wide living room, only being topped by the views of Boston she had through her big glassware.
It didn't matter what he imagined as he got there, reality topped it.
—You live here? —when he turned to her, his eyes were wide open— By yourself?
—Umm yeah, for now, yeah. I'm living here by myself —she giggled, walking down the two steps that led to the open living room, leaving her jacket over the backrest of the white leather couch.
—I bet I wouldn't even hear Mingi and Wooyoung arguing if they were on the other side of the room —he mentioned excitedly.
—And you'd end up missing them if you went just a day without hearing them —she answered back, turning to him.
As he followed her steps, walking in her direction, he was aware of the crystal stairs that went up from the side of the living room, finally aware that there was more than what he was seeing.
—There's another floor?
—Do you want to see?
San wasn't aware of how quickly he nodded, until she saw her giggling cutely at his response, correcting himself and gasping to give an answer with a thick voice. What would Y/n think of him if he acted like a little kid over something so simple?
—There isn't much to see —she mentioned, walking upstairs—. It's just a small office that isn't really an office —she pointed to the desk, topped by two shelves filled with books—, my room and the bathroom.
She said it as if they were the most random places, but San was already calculating the upper floor was almost as big as the place he shared with his two friends.
—It really isn't that big of a deal.
Her words didn't go along with what he was seeing. The area upstairs looked even better than the one downstairs. And by the way she had a few more things over the bed and the small desk a few meters from the stairs, he could tell that she spent most of her time up there.
—Ah, that —she chuckled when his eyes fell on the few clothes thrown all over her bed—. I tend to take a long while to choose what to wear.
And that day was particularly difficult, for some reason.
She struggled knowing what to wear to the office, but it was always more towards the idea of looking professional -or more like a boss people in her office would respect. But that day she spent almost one hour putting and taking off clothes, just to end up wearing a pair of simple tight jeans and a salmon blouse.
—Oh, I take a long time to dress, too —he lied.
And that was how she ended up wearing the same pair of jeans he always wore, with one of his sweaters, which sewings were already giving up.
He sighed, looking up at her after scanning himself.
—I can tell —she nodded, moving her fingers on his forearm over the wasted fabric of his blue sweater—. Blue fits you well —she commented in a casual tone.
His whole body reacted to one touch; anyone else wouldn't have been able to feel through his clothes, but they all suddenly turned as thin as gauze as soon as she touched him.
—Are you okay? —she asked first, aware of how that slight tan was slowly leaving his face.
—Huh? Hmm, yeah —he nodded.
He felt disappointed when her fingers left his body, but he also felt relieved when she stepped back and gave him some space.
—I'm okay, why would I be feeling bad? —he started speaking a bit faster— You're being nice, there's no reason why I would complain.
—San —she stopped him before he ended up in a cycle that'd take him a while to get out from—, breathe. It was just a yes or no question.
He was being ridiculous, yet she was being so calm and smiley that he wondered if she was doing it not to make him feel even worse by the way he was behaving.
—Right —he nodded.
—I thought I told you to treat me like a friend —her words were scolding him, but her tone sounded funny.
As she shook her head, she kicked her heels away, throwing them somewhere next to her bed, but being too eager to have her attention back on him to care about where they fell.
The few seconds she stepped away from him, and moved her eyes away, it was the time he was able to look around her penthouse, although his attention slowly shifted to how the sunset was making the windows of the skyscraper in front of hers turn completely orange.
—It's beautiful, isn't it? —she mentioned, walking over to him— I really like this time of the day.
—You like sunsets? —his eyes followed her as she approached the railing.
She smiled to herself as she nodded.
—More than sunrises?
—I don't really get to enjoy sunrises. On weekdays, I'm already in my car on my way to work when it happens, and on my weekends I sleep through it. I guess that could be why.
Her smile, despite looking the same at first glance, looked different at the same time. But he kept himself from asking, he had no right to make her feel uncomfortable with any question related to that.
—I really like your house.
He could notice the way her mood changed at the slight change of topic, moving his head to look around as soon as he realized she was going to turn to him.
—Do you want something to eat or drink?
—It's not necessary —San shook his head.
—Don't be dumb —she answered after sighing—. What do you want?
—You don't have to —San insisted.
—You should learn to stop saying "no", and just let things happen —she scolded him with a disappointed tone—. Let's go.
Her fingers hooked around his wrist, pulling from his body downstairs again, while he just walked wherever she wanted him to be at.
The kitchen was a mix of metallic and black colors, it was wide and clean. He'd almost think she had never cooked there. By the way it all was shiny, he bet he could almost see his reflex on the marble of the counter.
—Wooyoung would love this —he assured,
—Does he like cooking?
—He pretends he doesn't —San muttered—. But he always ends up making dinner, and always keeps Mingi and me from stepping inside his kitchen. Well, he's started letting Mingi help him sometimes, I'm still banned.
—What did you do to be banned? It's not like you set the kitchen on fire —she chuckled, until she became aware of his tell-tale expression—. You did?
—No —he quickly shook his head—. Because Wooyoung came before it could happen —he continued—. How would I guess that chicken would be covered in flames because I poured beer on it.
—How... Did you use a lighter for it? —her eyebrows raised in amusement, holding back her laughter.
—They're always messing with me, saying I don't know how to cook, so I looked for the most amazing recipe on Youtube. I still don't understand —he clicked his tongue—, it didn't happen to the cooker.
—Maybe because he's a professional who has prepared that same recipe millions of times —she giggled while approaching him.
His heart skipped a beat when her fingers squeezed his chin cutely. Such a casual touch that it made him wonder if she was that touchy-feely with everyone, and if he was overreacting by wanting to feel her fingers on him again. Unlike him, she just walked past him to reach the double door fridge.
—What do you want? —she asked first, looking at him for the first time.
And San could only pray she wasn't aware of the way his cheeks were burning, as he tried to get his body to behave normally back again.
—Oh.
His attention shifted from himself to the fridge. She was looking at the cans of coke and the bottle of water on one of the shelves, while the rest were filled with vegetables and four boxes that didn't look like any type of food, but that he didn't care about much because his eyes were in a hurry to meet Y/n's again.
—Sorry... I don’t tend to have people over.
—It's alright. I could have just a coke —he tried to calm her down—. I'm not really hungry.
After she insisted on meeting up a bit later than the other time so he'd have time to have lunch, he managed to eat something through his nervousness.
—Are you sure? I could order something.
—What? No —he shook his head—. Besides, I already ate back at home.
Why did her eyes look so big when he looked down at her? And why did he step so close to her? Y/n could even smell the wooden scent of his cologne by just breathing in some air.
—I'll have a coke, then.
San moved first, reaching the can to take it out and practically escape from that slim and small place that her kitchen had become. And there he was on the couch, regretting almost immediately. Anyone else would've taken the chance to kiss her, to go forward. But he was an expert on missing chances, and that night with Y/n wasn't going to be an exemption.
His eyes followed her when she joined him in the living room, sitting a few centimeters away from him, sure that she was giving him the space she thought he needed.
—Why did you call me?
—Hmm?
He opened his can so effortlessly with just one hand that she was left thoughtless for a few seconds, only being able to think of how those hands would feel around any part of her body.
—Why did you want us to meet?
—The barbeque —she quickly answered, trying to draw herself back to reality.
But was it something she couldn't discuss by chat?
—Yesterday we didn't get caught because we were lucky, but I think we need to prepare better for the weekend. I know an asshole will try to annoy you with his questions, and I think it'd be important if neither of us doubt while answering.
—So...
—So we need to be on the same page. If at some point you're alone with my father, you should be able to give the same answer I give —she started to explain.
—Will I be alone with your father? —he panicked just with the thought.
—I'll try not to, but it could happen —she sighed—. We need to settle and memorize who you are exactly.
—Shall we make up a whole new person?
—You think so? —her head tilted to the side—. I think it's okay for you to be just you, with slight changes —she started to explain.
They both worked on those new details from his life, although San spent most of the time hearing Y/n and her guidance, as he tried to memorize each one of those details so he wouldn't mess up when he was asked about it. It was basically learning things about a whole new person, even if he was planning to keep most of the basic things as true as possible. He didn't mind, it wasn't like he was going to do it more than just that weekend. And he was willing to adapt to the type of lie she wanted him to be.
—So, San —she called him with a sudden snob and thick voice—, I hear you're an engineer and you're back at studying, I guess you needed to to thicken your resume.
—I actually worked in Inno Corp, sir —San tried to repeat what he memorized, sitting straight as he spoke—. But I realized I wanted something better, so I started studying for a Master's Program.
—Inno Corp... I never heard of it.
Y/n stopped, feeling her throat dry after forcing that heavy tone in her voice. She gulped on her coke as she kept looking at San, analyzing his body language as he answered.
—It's a small company in Vancouver. They work with several confidential tasks, so that's why you probably haven't heard of it.
—I bet that asshole won't be able to answer back to that —her legs shook excitedly against the floor.
Which was something she hoped for, because that company didn’t even really exist in the first place.
—Shouldn't we also talk about my family? Or the uni I went to?
—Why? I just want them to see you're a hard worker, able to do things by himself —she pointed out—. I don't want you to lie to that extent, it's unnecessary.
—What if they ask how I'm affording to live now without working?
—Do you think they'll ask that to an engineer who has been working for a year in a technological company in Canada? —her eyebrow raised— Most of those dudes won't go further than asking about our relationship, which started...
—With a blind date through a mutual friend. And it was instant love.
—They’ll probably be so threatened by you, that they won't make you speak about your work more than basic things they can understand, so they can avoid looking as dumb as they are —she sighed, shrugging her shoulders.
—But we could lie about my background, I don't mind.
—But I do —she interrupted—. I don't want to give the image that I can do things only because of the man that's standing next to me. If you come from a rich family , they'll find a way to turn it into something negative. So I would rather that you keep as true to yourself as possible, so at least we don't lose that.
San looked at her with a serious expression, seeing that sad smile back on her face. He wanted to ask her so many things.
—Can I ask you something? —she asked first.
—Related to the fake relationship?
—No, it's about you —she answered, receiving a sign from his hand to go on—. You have never kissed anyone for real?
—Why were you looking so serious while asking that question? —his tongue clicked in annoyance.
—Just answer.
—No, I've never given a kiss —he confessed.
—So, you've never...
—What? —San looked at her, trying to guess what she meant.
—... had sex?
He could feel himself getting smaller as he sank on the pillow of the couch, while his cheeks lightened up like Christmas lights. With a tiny move of his head, he shook it, answering her question without saying a word.
—So, your videos…?
—All imagination —he answered, still not looking at her—. And I think you already know where I get all that inspiration from, so it's not necessary to get into details.
Although she wasn't surprised about that, she was surprised at how he was able to make it feel so vivid and real that it would look like he's rolled on too many beds. But at the same time, she was able to tell there were some details that did betray him when she watched his videos, or when she spoke on the phone with him.
There was some nervousness and hesitation she wasn't able to decipher, but now she knew where it all came from.
—Why aren't you laughing?
—Why should I? —Y/n frowned at his question.
—I mean, isn't it weird?
—Not really —she shook her head, puckering her lips—. You're twenty six, you haven't kissed anyone, so what? A kiss is way more intimate than what people make it seem to be —when her eyes fell on his, he knew he wouldn't be able to escape them unless she moved them away first—. You know how that person tastes, how warm their body feels —as she said that, she slowly approached him building up that intimacy she was talking about—, and how their heart beats against your fingertips when you move your fingers over their neck —her tone went lower—. It isn't a crime you're being careful of who you share those moments with —she whispered—, and nobody should laugh at you for that.
When she moved her head back a bit, clearing up the air again, she could see San with his eyes shut close and his lips almost parted in the direction she was in. She tried to hold back that cute smile that formed on her lips, although it wasn't of help when she still showed a glimpse of it as she bit her lower lip.
—Don't you agree?
As soon as San opened his eyes, Y/n felt she was trapped in her own trap, feeling her heart beating a fit faster when she noticed the tip of his tongue licking his lips.
Was it safe to kiss him?
Was it safe to kiss her?
The sound of his phone interrupted the bundle of confusion and thoughts that were floating over their heads, making the heavy air around them disappear with the predetermined music of his iPhone.
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Y/n had insisted on taking him more. Because it was late, because his house was far, and because she had a car that saved him from taking the bus or walking. He tried to keep her from leaving her house at that time, he didn't mind getting home so late -it wasn't the first time either-, but there was no one who could win an argument against her.
—Thanks for the ride —he thanked her—, and sorry for making you leave your place this late.
—It's not even that late —she tried to calm him down—. I also like driving, so it's not a big deal.
—Still, thank you.
They were alone in the dark, only lighted by the small lights of the different buttons in the car. It was intimate, it was close... Was it a good moment to kiss her? Should he kiss her?
—Oh, the lovebirds —Mingi interrupted.
San's jaw clenched at the voice of his friend. First, it was Wooyoung, and now it was Mingi. Both of them choosing the best time to interrupt something that could be a good moment.
—How are you, Y/n? —he leaned on San's window to be able to look at her.
—I'm okay, what about you?
—I'm good —he nodded—. Are you staying for dinner?
—I have things to do, but thank you.
—Yeah, she was just dropping me off —San commented.
—Did I interrupt something?
—Don't you think you were too slow to notice that? —San finally turned to him.
—It was nice to see you —he referred to Y/n—. Sorry, bro.
As Mingi walked away from the car, San tried to draw her focus back on him again.
—Can you send me a message when you get home? I mean, just if you want.
—I will —she tried to calm him down, knowing he'd enter that spiral if she didn't.
Before he could move away, her hands hooked around his neck and her head leaned to his, having her lips colliding against the curve of his lower lip, again making it seem as if she was kissing him.
And while he knew she was doing it because Mingi was possibly still outside, and she wasn't even kissing him on the lips, San felt his stomach turning upside down and his legs becoming weak as jelly.
—Have a good night —she whispered.
—You, too.
He was looking good, he managed to keep a cool position, until the moment of stepping out of the car came. He was so focused on looking at her, that he missed one step and ended up tripping on the pavement, almost falling in front of her car.
Y/n giggled at his clumsiness, and how he tried to play it cool even if he was still well aware she saw the panic on his face as he lost control of his body for a quick moment.
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xxscarletxrosexx · 5 months ago
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Addressing Watermarks on Official Merch Scans -- A Post Made to EDUCATE
I never thought this would need to be addressed, but I think to ignore this would do me injustice as someone who works in education. This message, at its core, is to educate, not attack anyone in particular.
I used to think how silly it was that people used watermarks on pictures and art, but after spending decades in multiple fandom groups, I learned that people are simply too lazy to find the source and credit accordingly and/or want the glory/validation that comes from claiming that particular art/picture as theirs.
I've had a picture stolen once, too. It was a picture of a mannequin that reminded me of Slender Man. I posted it on a public social media app just for laughs, and somehow, that picture ended up becoming a small meme. It WASN'T a huge meme, but it made its way to a niche of Slender Man memes. I haven't received credit for that picture and probably never will. The reason is that this picture was taken over a decade ago, so finding the source would be difficult for me to scroll through the app. Furthermore, I can't show proof that I have the original picture since it was from an old phone that I no longer owned. I had the picture backed up on an external hard drive, but it was deleted when the memory got wiped when I was dealing with a virus. Ultimately, I'm not here to air out my grievance for this picture, but I take it as a lesson to myself that I should be careful next time if I want to post a picture on the internet.
This now brings me to the present-day issue: why did I watermark my scans?
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As you read from my previous experience, it's because people DON'T credit or share the source.
I am very much aware that this particular design of the Forgers is very rare to come by. The official art was posted by the official website, but it was never addressed again (I know because I am dying to have acrylic stands of this design). As of today, I tried to look for this specific design and the following images showed up when I spent the past 10 minutes scrolling:
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If you were to click the link for the merch (middle image), you would find that the website is unavailable. So, yes, to find this design on a merch was INCREDIBLY lucky on my part. Now, I wasn't expecting to find this at Waku Waku Park, nor was it my mission to find this specific art during the duration of my trip. It just so happened to be at the shop. To my knowledge, other official SxF merch--other than the Waku Waku Park merch--supposedly changes. I compared my experience with two SxF moots who went in December (Ikebukuro/Tokyo location) and 1 week (Osaka location) before me, and they both don't recall finding this design during their visits to Waku Waku Park (I mean, justified because it's been ages ago). As a result, this makes this merch all the more difficult to find.
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Technically, I wasn't allowed to take pictures of the merchandise when I was at the shop. I was approached by a store clerk after I had already completed taking pictures of every merch available at the shop. She was limited in her English but crossed her index fingers and told me: "Pictures prohibited." I have not, nor do I plan to, share merch pictures, hence why I edited to the clear file folders to show proof that I was there.
The reason why I am so hell-bent on having my watermark on MY PICTURES and MY SCANS is because of the amount of time, effort, and money I invested into getting it.
Just to give you guys an idea of how expensive it was:
$1,500 was spent on a 9-day round-trip ticket to Japan.
$180 was lost to an overnight night bus from Tokyo to Osaka that I didn't end up riding due to rushing and booking the wrong date. I was not allowed to cancel or refund.
$100 was spent on an airplane ticket from Tokyo to Osaka.
$90 was spent on a shinkansen (bullet train) from Kyoto to Tokyo (we took a fast metro ride from Osaka to Kyoto).
$100 was spent on a last-minute B&B in Osaka.
$50 was spent on Waku Waku Park tickets that came with merchandise (I paid for my friend's ticket as well as my own).
$12 (est.) was spent on purchasing this clear file folder.
Over $350 was spent on purchasing merch from Waku Waku Park alone.
$60 was invested in purchasing a scanner just to scan a high-quality image of this clear file for my friend, and anyone else who'd appreciate seeing this product.
To share how much time and effort it took to get to purchasing this:
My friend and I weren't able to book events for the trip despite purchasing our tickets 2 months in advance. Our jobs and schedules prevented us from meeting up and planning out places where we'd like to visit. As a result, many of our planned trips were booked days before we went, such was the case with Waku Waku Park. We literally bought the tickets the night before.
The flight, night bus, and shinkansen tickets from Tokyo to Osaka and from Kyoto to Tokyo were purchased the day before we bought the tickets, which was during our bus ride trip to Mount Fuji.
When purchasing tickets for Waku Waku Park, my SxF moots recommended I purchase online or at Lawson--I did the latter. For whatever reason, I just couldn't purchase the tickets online, so I went to Lawson and found a machine that sells general tickets to the public. I recall this experience being so frustrating because they did have an English translation option for the homepage ONLY. Once I clicked the platform that sold Waku Waku Park tickets, all text went back to Japanese. I couldn't read it, so I had to contact my SxF moot (who was fortunately still in Japan and went through this experience like me AND could read and speak in Japanese) explain to me what I was looking at. I also used Google Lens to help make sense of whatever I was reading. I probably spent over 10 minutes trying to figure that shit out until the shop clerk finally came over to see if he can help me complete the form and check out my purchase (poor kid didn't know English but we somehow managed).
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When my friend and I arrived in Osaka, we had forgotten to book a B&B since we knew that there was a high likelihood that we'd stay overnight. I purchased a 1-day Osaka trip pass, assuming that we'd be able to go to every place offered on the list, but nope, my friend crashed after Waku Waku Park. As a result of booking so early in the morning, we were fortunate to have found a B&B that was ready by 1 PM (?) maybe 3 PM (?). I can't remember other than the fact that when I requested if we could come early, they told me we couldn't come until check-in time. So, we went to ATC Gallery (Waku Waku Park) with our luggages (fortunately, they were light but it was a nuisance to have carried it around). We were also fortunate that ATC Gallery, when arriving to the building via metro station, had a locker that could fit our luggage--so thank goodness we didn't have to carry it during the exhibit.
We learned that once you exit the exhibit--which means you exit the merch shop--you are NOT allowed to come back in. Even, when your companion was still inside, you couldn't go back in. My friend left the merch shop since there were no places for her to sit and wait for me. So she stepped out of the shop. Apparently, there are gates with workers preventing people from re-entering. And so, when I experienced problems with my card, I called my friend to have her lend me her credit card. That's when we experienced that problem. The officer was kind enough to allow my friend to hand me her card so that I could pay for my haul of merch. But imagine, if we both left the shop to go to a store to withdraw money? There was no Lawson store nearby so we'd have to take the metro and find one, buy a ticket, return to the venue, go through the exhibit AGAIN (I probably would have to repeat playing the minigames, collecting stamps, and having my photo taken out of courtesy rather than rushing through the exhibit), and then finally arrive at the merch shop. But considering the time we entered the park around 1:30 PM and spent 2 hours in the park, I believe that it would have ended with a very tight schedule (the park closes at 6:00 PM) and a very unhappy companion.
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In conclusion, removing my watermarks means you (the watermark remover) discredit me and disrespect all of my time, effort, and money I invested just to get a high-quality scan of this clear file just for you to enjoy looking at and most likely saving it to your collection of SxF images. You are also a THIEF for not only stealing my scanned image and re-uploading my scan with a horrible cut and my watermarks removed with AI, but also for the fact that you DID NOT pay for a round-trip ticket to Japan, you DID NOT pay for your own ticket to Waku Waku Park, you DID NOT purchase this clear file yourself, and you DID NOT spend money on a scanner to get this high-quality image to post on the internet.
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I know that this is MY SCANNED image of the official art because I can see ghost texts of my watermark between Loid and Yor and near Anya's finger and Bond's forehead. I can see the residual cut off of the weird light-blue scan found near Loid's head. The most obvious is that the red leaf between Yor and Loid was horribly "removed" by AI (dear, I use AI to edit out people from my photos, it doesn't take a trained and perfectionist eye to notice something looks fucked up).
Below is an example of me using AI, and this is not how it should look without people. There was a clear pathway behind the people but AI decided to cover it with grass. Keep in mind that to arrive to THIS AI edit, it took me over an hour to repeat the removal process since AI's edit is RANDOM every time. I am an extreme perfectionist, so I tend to waste hours on end to find AI edits that look convincing (I'm not gonna bother putting a watermark on this because my face is there).
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Furthermore, as far as I'm aware (at this current time), I know that my scan is the only one that has resurfaced this image. The official merch image of this design is quite difficult to find and reference. I would've sourced it by now if I had already found it, but I've spent 6 hours writing this entire post as is and still couldn't find it.
The person who shared the removal of my watermark on Twitter/X was unaware of the importance for watermarking scans and had been cooperative by taking down her original post. I have provided a post to my scans on Twitter/X here, and a link to the original source found on my Ko-Fi shop. I currently have no beef with her, nor am I attacking her with this post. What she had presented to me was an opportunity to educate.
If you're looking for official merch that do not have watermarks slashed across their products, then your best bet is to find them from official merch websites and/or official merch images. Obviously, they want you to purchase their products. Second, they have the legal rights and trademark (TM) to flex that they own it, so I highly doubt anyone would go out of their way to edit an official work and claim it as their image.
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My experience alone confirms that had I not put a watermark on my scan, I would have definitely gotten this scan stolen. As far as I'm aware, my scan is the ONLY ONE (at this current moment) that pops up in Google searches. It pops up via Tumblr from @yumeka-sxf Spy x Family miscellaneous collab scans - part 3 post.
I'm so grateful to have received advice from @yumeka-sxf because she encouraged me to protect my scans having experienced multiple thefts from her oldest scanned images in the past.
TLDR; Don't remove people's watermarks on scanned pictures (especially if they're put on official merch). We have the right to post watermarks on our pictures/scans because we spent ungodly time and effort to find them, spent money to purchase them, scanned/took high-quality pictures of them, and kindly shared our collection(s) FOR FREE for people to enjoy, share the experience, and/or inspire them to purchase one themselves. Unfortunately, the decision to put watermarks over purchased merch is because there are people who are willing to do whatever it takes to edit out credit and watermarks found in corners or in open spaces to claim ownership of the image. I have also seen merchants' product pictures being stolen by other sellers who just happen to have the same product (yes, I'm calling Ebay and Mercari out). That's why there are sellers who take pictures of their products next to their usernames.
If you have read everything until the very end, you have my gratitude. I hope that this post has been educational in helping everyone become aware that watermarks are used to credit people's time, effort, and money to share high-quality scans/pictures of official merch that they purchased. The reason you can see it is because of their efforts to share it.
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bonefall · 1 year ago
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First off, obviously this is a WC blog so I won't go further but THANKS for the brief dunk of The Lion Guard, that's one of my biggest problems with the show. Second off, are you seeing this shit Elder Bones?! * Points at the Thunder Spoiler Thread at WCRPForums * Do try to avoid reading the posts that aren't chapters though, they're bad as usual for that site lol.
Maybe one day I'll grumble about Lion King on the side blog lmao.
Anyway... that spoiler thread. I try to take these threads with a pinch of salt, but... overall feelings are really getting negative. If I had a Vibes Barometer, the needle would be dipping out of positive right now.
We're 2 books away from the conclusion and I don't know if they have time to turn this around... and they chose to spend time traveling. It's partially a travel book, guys. Several chapters of pointless bullshit.
(Spoilers under the cut-- remember we are getting this secondhand from a spoiler thread. Some of this may turn out to be misrepresentation.)
NIGHTHEART STUFF
We start off where the preview left off. They jerk the shit out of your chain with Squirrelstar teasing but spoiler we DO got her
(CELEBRATORY SQUIRRELSTAR MUSIC)
We get a BrambleSquirrel screaming match. Please for the love of god divorce these characters, this is fucking insufferable
They also had to give Bramblestar a smug little gotcha moment where he's right about his argument, Squilf accidentally walks to SkyClan camp for the plot and it turns out that Bramblestar, the guy who was apparently supposed to have memory issues and brain fog, was right that Squilf forgot how to navigate her own territory
Im dead serious she like... accidentally walked to SkyClan.
This is a clever literary trick called bad writing <3
While they're there, Nightheart says, "HEY WASNT THERE A MEDIATOR THINGY? ISNT HE SUPPOSED TO SOLVE DISPUTES?"
*I look directly into the camera. Right at you. Reader I am glimpsing across the magical threads of the internet, directly into your soul.*
Leafstar
says
"I Forgor"
if this thread is to be believed. Then the canonical explanation for why Tree was not mediating up to this point. Is because every single cat around the lake. Including the geniuses who came up with a unique role JUST for the specialest little boy. Just fucking forgot about him.
(bestselling young adult series)
Do I laugh? Do I cry?
I think im unlocking the emotion that those lizards who shoot blood from their eyes feel just before a squirt
Anyway
There is also an absurd amount of Bramblestar winking at Nightheart and teasing him about his new mate and reminding the audience about how much Nightheart wuvs him. This is probably supposed to be charming?
it just feels unsettling, ngl.
It's even more Bramble Worship than normal, like the writer is trying really hard to stress how cool and awesome their special boy is :D and how dumb and mean his wife is >:( and it's so fucking forced.
They pad the book by having it be cloudy so that StarClan doesn't show up the first time they try to do the Squirrelstar thing
I kept thinking, "What if this wasn't a willing abdication?? What if the Clan didn't have a second chance to do this?? What if this was Nightstar 2 all over again and she died of plot convenience before coming back?! This dumbfuck system has fixed NOTHING"
Plumstone and Dewnose have a moment where they antagonize Nightheart over the fact he was chosen to accompany Squilf and Bramble to the Moonpool, because he just got back and it's not fair
And you know what? They're right actually
Nightheart huffs that Squilf was giving him a Chance To Prove Himself but he doesn't fucking get it! His whole life's been nothing but chances he threw tantrums about being offered or blew up through wrecklessness, like a spoiled brat nepobaby, and he keeps getting more and more
Meanwhile Plumstone here has been in the background just being this consistently steady warrior, and has never gotten a chance to shine
He also has a moment where he whines about Sparkpelt and Finchlight being mean to him in the past when Sunbeam shares they've been super nice to her.
Sunbeam offers that they're probably trying to make up for it and he agrees.
Folks. I REALLY. REALLY HOPE. That this ends with Sunbeam telling him, "Nightheart, you are the problem. They've treated me like Kin, and they treat their Kin well. Do YOU?"
Anyway something happens and suddenly Nightheart's on the trip with Frostpaw.
The rest of his chapters so far (at time of writing the spoiler thread is at chapter 14-ish) are traveling chapters.
The traveling chapters suck diet discount dick. They look like they were rejected submissions for the various travel shenanigans that happened in Riverstar's Home.
For me, this is the most disappointing part of the Thunder Spoiler Thread. I love Nightheart because I really like the idea of him learning to grow, consider his actions, and realize that he's actually been very loved in his life.
I like the impulsive Nightheart from Book 1 who doesn't know what's wrong with himself, shooting down every attempt others make to bond with him, making shocking descisions that frustrate the entire Clan and not realizing how much he gets away with. I hoped that maybe, just maybe, the writing could be a little clever for once.
But, no. On this trip he's still whining to Frostpaw about how his family "wanted him to be like Firestar" and this is treated as something Frostpaw is able to bond with him about, somehow, because Curlfeather wanted her to be a Medcat??? And now she's choosing to be a Medcat again anyway????
FROSTPAW STUFF
WC Writing Team: "Everyone is super invested in Frostpaw's story where she learns to choose her own path! Especially the idea that she chose to not be a medcat of her own will and made a brave choice for herself! Lets fix that"
Literally, I guess lol
Smoky Cameo. Fuck Smoky. I hate this character and I hate seeing his deadbeat ass.
Gotta love how Daisy's one major role in ASC so far has been to be a source of negative emotions for Nightheart, but Smoky gets to be the new Barley with a cutesy barn rest stop.
He calls for a human to come get Frostpaw because she's got wounds.
Like. Cat MEOW MEOW calling. And this summons... a magic vet?
She has the world's fastest field surgery, as if she's some kind of endangered wild leopard and a top-notch vet staff rolled out of a research truck.
They even inject her, by hand, with tranquilizer. Who the fuck carries cat tranquilizer around?
Is this barn in the back of a fucking vet office???
Does this universe have roving surgical vans that drive around and play music like an ice cream truck, waiting for cats to call them over?????
Frostpaw wakes up back in the barn
But now her neck wound is fixed and she's spayed.
She looks down at the fresh cut on her abdomen and is like "what's this"
Smoky: "dont worry abt it"
If Frostpaw is okay with being sterilized, this will be the first time in the series that a cat being fixed will be seen as a good thing
Which, irl, it is. To be clear. Spay and neuter your animals
But dudes, this is really massively unsettling me. It seems like she doesn't know what has been done to her. This has never been treated as a positive thing in this series before. In the last book she was talking about the sort of life she would like to live
Once again she has been stripped of her own choices in a massive way
And if Smoky apparently lives so close to a vet that they just come when he calls,
I have so many questions im losing my marbles
Why is Smoky not neutered
Why were none of his 3, possibly 4 wives spayed
Why are his kids not fixed
Why were his kits with Floss taken "when they were too young to even open their eyes" back in TNP if their humans are so loving and educated
SO EDUCATED THEY WALK AROUND WITH CAT TRANQUILIZER
Anyway through the power of the writers not caring anymore, Frostpaw can now talk to StarClan whenever she wants.
They have magically bestowed a connection onto her.
This is apparently something they can just do now. Maybe it's tied to near-death experiences or the vet or something
Remember Shadowsight having a whole thing about this at the end of TBC?
Remember Mothwing and how upsetting it was to have no connection to them and how finding Willowpaw was a big thing in TNP?
Yeah apparently they could just do this whenever. Sorry.
Frostpaw is just cool with this because fuck the last book where she found out she likes being a warrior
Agency? What's THAT
It's not ok if your mom encourages you to be a doctor nun, but StarClan rips your organs out and forces you to be their mouthpiece and that's peachy-fucking-keen.
Then she goes traveling for several chapters i want to commit crime
Riverstar does the usual alarmist moaning, "ooooouuugh this newest crisis could destroy riverclan!!! Oooooooooooooouuououou it's for real this time!!!!"
Everything's gonna destroy the clans. A light breeze has just reduced ThunderClan to rubble. A beetle has landed gently upon Harestar's nose, 34 dead 25,430 injured
Girl help frostpaw is being followed by clickbait headline ghosts
And, also, for no good reason, the ghosts can't just answer a question. Why? Who fucking knows. Never explained. They can summon Frostpaw into a Ghost Zoom Call whenever they want now, but they're forbidden from revealing anything useful.
Average autistic experience with zoom calls though, can confirm, that is what every zoom call ive ever been in was like.
Im serious though, she tries to ask Reed who killed him, he just says no i cant :(
She tries to ask where her mom is. They don't tell her she's downstairs.
Riverstar says nothing useful
I have never been more frustrated with StarClan as a plot device. This is actually fucking insufferable.
They're annoying enough when they send vague signs and prophecies that amount to nothing, but now they can pop up like shitty unskippable cutscenes and STILL add nothing of value to the plot
Something I was ENJOYING was how much more grounded ASC was compared to previous arcs, and that StarClan was back to being difficult to access directly. Gone. Goodbye.
SUNBEAM STUFF
The highlight of the book everyone leave me alone i need to speak directly to sunbeam
I like how she's finding more reasons than just Nightheart to stay in ThunderClan, but is also struggling with the shift in culture
It's in a Sunbeam chapter that we FINALLY get Squilfstar. Everyone say Thank You Sunbeam
If you even LOOK at the Sunbeam wrong I will smash you to death with my hooves
For once it actually feels like we're using the cast in ThunderClan. Cherryfall, Dewnose, Plumstone, Myrtlebloom, Bayshine, Finchlight, Sparkpelt, and Lionblaze all get some significant little lines to add to this.
In particular I like Cherryfall throwing a bit of a fit about being a senior warrior and acting high and mighty, which Sunbeam immediately dislikes because ShadowClan doesn't do as much posturing. It's fun to see how she percieves ThunderClan cats.
I have a softness for these sorts of stories though, to be fair. The idea of moving to a new place and having to adjust.
It's also neat that she's growing frustrated with how Nightheart has now ditched her THRICE.
Girl please steal his family and dump him.
Be a legend. Marry his sister. It would make you the queen of pettiness you would become my favorite forever
Ivypool's exams are also pretty neat, they all test teamwork abilities. I'm going to be happy when I finally get to read them in full, if nothing else, these trials have been delightful to see.
Anyway the next emergency gathering comes up and it descends into an argument
Dovewing gets to yell at Ivypool and tell her to back off <3 "You're not going to manipulate my mate through me, screw you"
Tigerheartstar and the other leaders eventually agree to meet with the mediator off-screen because the writers don't feel like showing us Tree's madd skillz which definitely justify having this unique role that we completely forgot about until just now
It doesn't accomplish anything meaningful because they only acknowledged the mediator role to make the fans stop complaining
Tigerheartstar agrees to not station more warriors in RiverClan territory but nothing else. Waow.
aaand Berryheart's planning something and Sparrowtail, Sunbeam's father, accidentally spills the beans to his daughter. I like this because I have always imagined him as a himbo
so... yeah. It's not looking great. I'm not having a good time in this spoiler thread. I am hoping that a fair amount of it is misrepresentation, because if it's what the leaker says it is, I'm not going to be a happy camper
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