#and i only took pics of every scene that excited me

[tnbc-thoughtsandheadcanons]

One of the things I’m really hoping to hear in any of upcoming books is for Jack or Sally to say an “I love you” to one another. I know they’ve shown nothing but true love to one another (they’re married! Lol) but it would be so adorable to hear them actually say it since they haven’t technically yet♥️♥️

J...

Jack and Sally have never directly said that they love each other in any adaptations yet...

...huh...

[rewh0re]

PATIENCE ; NANAMI KENTO

—wc: 1.9k, angst, canon compliant, death, nanami is married (to you) and has a child (with you), implied female reader (mrs and mama used), fluffy in the beginning dw, crying yuuji hmm that's it :D REBLOGS + FEEDBACKS ARE APPRECIATED!!

—a/n: i have an exam and I'll prolly be posting it right before that so...yea lwk I wrote this cuz I was so fucking stressed but anyways enjoy:D

pic creds: pinterest

Patience.

Patience was never something you would say you were good at. You had always been a very impatient being since you were but a mere child. You would always tap your feet and whine while waiting for your food to be served as a child which often led to some disciplinary words from your parents. You would sit at the edge of your seat in movie halls, waiting impatiently for the climax of the movie. You could never hold your excitement when it came to receiving presents on events such as birthdays or christmas. You simply couldn't.

“Never lose patience, y/n. Great things always come to those who are patient enough to wait,” your father had once told you, holding your tender, childish hands softly in his. You had promised then to practice your patience.

Then came Nanami Kento. Nanami came into your life when you were almost done being patient with finding love. You had waited and waited and done nothing but waited to be loved and adored passionately, to be treated with gentleness and care and all the affection that the world could provide. For the longest time it felt like the universe did not want that for you. Men after men who you had held nothing but love for had left you stranded and lovelorn, a crying mess at three in the night with your romantic heart broken in pieces. Shattered even.

Then came the man who showed you what it was like to be loved unconditionally. Meeting the love of your life at a bakery was something you believed happened only in fiction. But it happened to you and after what felt like an eternity, you could say you felt grateful due to your patience. 

Nanami was a simple man. He worked a corporate job with a salary that got him by. He hated working overtime because it took away the time that he would rather spend lounging around with you in the comfort of your home. 

He later told you he was a jujutsu sorcerer and all you could take out from that conversation was that being a jujutsu sorcerer is a very difficult job. But he was strong—he told you—not the strongest, that title was held by his annoying senior but strong enough. You did not know if that comforted you but he came home every night. He came home to you and the moment he held you in his arms, all your worries dissipated into thin air.

He baked when he was anxious which you learnt quite late. For example, he baked cupcakes before he proposed marriage to you. You did not know the occasion that entailed the many cupcakes kept on your table with a very distressed Nanami at the table. It was only when he dropped the ring while asking you to marry him that you knew that under all his cool and poised persona, your Kento was quite clumsy. You said yes, ofcourse. The next incident you remember of your husband baking would be when you were going into labour. It was a chaotic scene, it was your due date, and Kento was immensely stressed. So, like any stressed person would do, he started baking a chocolate cake. And as endearing as it was, in the middle of it you went into labour and your husband was frantic. Well, at least your daughter came into the world that day and nothing could beat the relief and happiness that washed over Nanami’s face as he held the little sleeping baby in his arms.

“I love you. I love you so much and I love our little girl, no one else matters,” he rubbed the back of your hand as he kissed your forehead.

“We love you too. So much. Thank you for teaching me patience for it led me to you,” you beamed up at him and he smiled at you and that was all that mattered. Your family.

Thus, you learnt patience while being with Nanami. For once you held your father’s belief, that great things do happen to those who are patient enough to wait.

It was Halloween of 2018 when your patience was tested once again. Your daughter loved Halloween and she loved spending it with her father. For the two years that she had been on earth, she and your husband decorated your home with jack-o-lanterns and candles and streamers and what not. Your husband was a great storyteller with how he enraptured your daughter with his stories. 

It turned out your daughter inherited your trait of impatience for she could not wait for her father to return from his important work so that they could finally go trick or treating together.

You, on the other hand, were impatient for a different reason. You were worried. It was a vague call saying Kento was needed immediately at Shibuya due to urgent business. He denied relaying the exact cause of his dispersal but you were smart enough to understand that it was something related to the jujutsu world. The first sign of worry came when he didn't tell you the exact reason. 

“Where are you going, dada?” your daughter held Nanami’s leg, looking up at him with curious eyes.

“Dada has important work, baby. Celebrate with mama and then we three will watch anything you wish to when i return, okay?” he crouched down to her level, gently patting her head.

“Promise you will return soon?” your daughter held out her pinky, a toothless grin making its way on her face.

Hesitance was clear on your husband’s face as he gulped and did his best to smile. That was the second sign of worry.

Nanami linked his pinky with his little beam of sunshine, “I will try my best sweetheart.”

And that was all the reassurance your daughter needed as she ran back to her candy stash in the kitchen. It wasn't enough for you.

“Kento, will you be okay? I’m worried,” you held onto his wrist unable to look up.

You felt his finger on your chin tipping up your face as your teary eyes met his.

“I will try my best to finish this as soon as I can and return to you both,” he gently kissed your temple in a comforting manner but nothing about the situation felt even remotely comforting.

“Promise me you will come home safe Kento,” you touched your forehead to his, looking him in his eyes.

“I have never lied to you and I never will y/n. I cannot make a promise whose surety I cannot guarantee. I love you and I love our daughter and I will try my best to return home to the both of you,” he whispered and you wanted to understand his situation, but you were scared.

“Do you absolutely have to go?” the tears fell from your eyes as he engulfed you in the tightest hug. 

That was the longest he had hugged you and it felt like all his being was screaming that no, he did not want to go but duty calls. You hugged him back just as tightly and the finality of it all did not sit right with you. 

Then with whispered declarations of love from the both of you, he left for his job and it was just you and your daughter.

The third sign of worry washed over you when it was well past eleven at night. You put your daughter to bed amidst her constant crying and whining for Kento and your comforting whispers saying he will return. You could not help but sit at the kitchen, your fingers tapping the marble kitchen island in an impatient manner. Your eyes kept averting to the clock. When would he come back? Your daughter’s soft snores filled the silence along with the clock’s frantic ticking. It was dreadful, nothing about this silence screamed peace. You just wanted your husband to come home and complete your family.

And then the doorbell rang. A sharp ring that echoed throughout the house and for a second relief washed over your body. Kento was home. He returned home. To your daughter. To you. You almost tripped as you ran to open the door.

“Kento it's so late you had me worri—” it was not Kento. Looking at you from the other side of the door was Yuuji. A very bruised and battered Yuuji. His pink hair was a mess with dirt and blood stuck on it. There was a big gash on his face and his clothes were bloodied. 

“Yuuji what…what happened? Are you alright dear? Come in let me clean the wound,” you gently held the boy’s hand and he could not meet your eyes. His lips wobbly and hand limp in your hold.

“Yuuji, is everything alright?” Is Kento alright? That's what you wanted to ask.

“Mrs. Nanami, I am so sorry,” the boy sniffed.

“Is Kento…” you could not say it, saying it would give it a shape, a form, the truth is always a hard pill to swallow.

“I am sorry. He…he wanted you to know that he loves you and your daughter more than anything in the world. It's my fault, I am so sorry. I was useless. I could not save him,” you could not cry in front of a boy who was clearly breaking apart. You could not do it.

It was difficult to process, everything felt unreal. You hoped, wished for Kento to come and say it was just a silly prank and Yuuji agreed to go with it. But none of that happened. It was just you and a broken teenager standing in front of you blaming himself for something that was not his fault. You could not cry. Not now.

So you took the boy in your arms. You hugged Yuuji tightly and gently stroked his hair.

“Thank you for telling me Yuuji. I may not understand much about his work but he loved you. So much. As do I. And as does our daughter. I know none of it was your fault and you must not blame yourself for it, Kento would not want you to. You are just a boy, it will never be your fault. Just know he was proud of you, so am I. Thank you for relaying the news, sweet child,” you kissed his temple and looked him in the eye, a watery smile on your lips.

Nanami and you were parental figures to Yuuji and the last thing you would want was for the boy to blame himself for the inevitable.

You knew you would break once Yuuji left, you would cry in the home you had built and god you did not even want to think about your daughter’s reaction to the news. She was a daddy’s girl after all. But right now you needed to make sure the boy in front of you was okay, he had to go fight again and save the jujutsu world, you could not lose him too. 

So you hugged Yuuji and let a few tears escape your eyes as he sobbed in your arms. You both needed each other. You allowed yourself a moment of company before you would be left alone again, sobbing and breaking at the thought of your husband not coming home. Before you had to tell your daughter and witness her tears and loneliness.

This time patience did not bring something great. This time, patience snatched away the one thing that mattered the most to you.

[le-trash-prince]

Em, I came into the whole 'Benz-Garfield are desperate to get paired and/or make KimKenta happen' thing halfway through and I feel like I'm still desperately playing catch-up. Congratulations to them on making Part A happen and good luck with Part B, though! But in the interests of me continuing to play catch-up on this whole fascinating process, do you know if there's a timeline of events or a tiktok folder or *something* out there to help me piece together when all of this properly took off and when Benz in particular decided to go full unhinged with it?

Thanks for your help!

Anon if you weren't watching Pit Babe as it aired, I hope you are prepared for the emotional roller coaster that happens when you are waiting every week to see if Kim and Kenta even get screentime together. I felt like I was watching the last several episodes of Pit Babe on a fever high.

I am actually working on a timeline, but it’s not fully cohesive nor complete yet, since there’s simply so much to sift through on multiple social media platforms, and no platform has a perfect search function. It also doesn’t yet include social media posts where they were simply just… flirting with each other, but all the social media posts on the blog should at least be dated.

If you want to go through things more quickly, the archive page has a tag filter (one of my favorite tumblr features), and you can swap in any tag you like in the url, since the dropdown only lists featured tags.

It’s also hard to pinpoint a single moment when Benz decided to go unhinged with it, since he’s been pushing it from pretty early on. There also aren’t any dedicated translators in BenzGarfield fandom who are fluent in both Thai and English, so we either get machine translations or translations that are few and far between. There's also a lot of old posts that have been deleted, or accounts that have gone private, so even just the act of gathering everything is an effort, let alone organizing it into a big picture.

Here's what I can give as a highlight timeline though.

They met in late 2022 (Love Fest Thailand in November or December I think, I couldn't find pics, but I did just watch an old interview last night where they talk more in depth on their first impressions, which I plan on recording and uploading, but Garfield said something that can be paraphrased to the extent of "Do people this friendly and charming exist in real life?")

Benz was mingling with Change2561 actors, but they officially became coworkers in Feb 2023 when they were both cast in Pit Babe

Boys Journey started filming very shortly after—I don’t have a sharp timeline but the range is sometime from Feb to May. Benz was already going at it in Boys Journey (“BenzGarfield forever” - ep 10), when they ostensibly didn’t know their roles or if they’d be put in an actual ship (they were somewhat rotated around with ppl until later in Boys Journey, when I imagine the staff had chemistry based partnerships in mind)

In March, Garfield said he would choose Benz to flirt with out of all the cast.

By August, Benz was asking Garfield to take his last name 🤷‍♂️ (but Garfield keeps trying to take Benz's first name instead)

There was a lot going on while Pit Babe was filming (Sept-Nov). They were excited about filming the two whole scenes they had together, they tweeted about it the night before, they were improvising what communication between Kenta and Kim might be like, Benz was visiting set even when he didn't have any scenes (albeit likely for the free food, but keeping Garfield company while Charlie fakes his death is a nice bonus)

I haven’t been able to find it again (yet)(thank you YT’s horrible search function) but there was a livestream last year where Benz talked about Kenta calling Kim and inviting him to Thailand, which… never happened, so I can only assume they were at the point of making things up (which actors sometimes do when they need a better grip on a character), and probably explains the really loaded look they gave each other in the elevator, bc to them there had been more interactions between their characters.

The first event they did together (outside of full-cast stuff) was the RealMe sponsorship in September 2023, but it was presented as Garfield & Benz (didn’t stop Benz from once again asking Garfield to take his name). The first time (that I’m aware of) that they had an event with their ship name was the GarfieldBenz x Central Rayong event in December 2023. Filming was completed in November, so they obviously had known for a while that KimKenta weren’t a couple, but that wasn’t going to stop them from bickering over which of their characters would like the other first

In February, they were posting really shippy stuff right before the Pit Babe finale, which felt like queerbaiting at the time, but we didn’t know that Long Beans was being planned (they would begin the physio workshop a month later), so I think this was either a “we’re excited we get to play a ship but can’t say anything yet” or a “staff hasn’t made up their minds on casting us so let’s just show some potential.”

Also at the finale in February, Garfield said he wanted to be Kim's faen.

By the time Long Beans was announced in March and they were officially announced as BenzGarfield, there was no holding back, especially on the KimKenta front. Benz made a fuss during Long Beans presscon about them not getting any screentime together, and during the Changing event in April they talked about going to the writers and begging for KimKenta/KentaKim.

Anytime they're asked about S2, they're vague about it, and I imagine they will be until we see something onscreen (they have to keep me desperate and foaming at the mouth), but they have expressed that they want to continue working as screen partners for a long time. If KimKenta happens I don't think anyone will be happier than those two.

I hope this helps, anon! Trying to capture and organize all of their moments is a daily task, and it sometimes feels like I am Sisyphus.

[brightlight-dazzlingeyes]

where the sidewalk ends | pablo gavi

🎃 synopsis: Sofie meets an ex-hookup during a Halloween party. The full moon is high in the sky, the Summer they shared is now only a memory, and there are weirder things to worry about. warnings: alcohol consumption, smut, spooky themes, social media, fluff (Wc: 3k)

(this is a sequel to ibiza night fever, but can be read as standalone)

|the playlist|

“But all the magic I have known I've had to make myself.” ― Shel Silverstein, Where the Sidewalk Ends

It’s finally October, every melancholic girl's favorite time of the year. After a breakup and a much-needed Hot Girl Summer, what Sofie needed was a Sad Girl Autumn, and she’s been taking advantage of the season.

She started doing yoga and has been reading a lot more; you can confirm that by checking her Insta feed – she’s been filling it with intellectual aesthetic pics.

Strolls through the park, loud sighs, pumpkin spice drinks—anything that makes her look like the protagonist of a pretentious European indie film.

Tonight, though, is a special night. Tonight Sofie is a sexy Barbie Cowgirl, and she’s accompanied by Black Swan, Sleeping Beauty, and Carrie. Or, Chiara, Luisa and Becca, as they are known the rest of the year.

It’s Luisa’s annual Halloween party. It’s been a hit since the first edition and the first time Sofie will be attending it as a single lady.

If the last few months have taught her anything, it is how to be casual, or at least how to appear casual. Sofie was focused on having fun, holding her phone in one hand and a gin tonic drink in another. She scrolled through social media while taking another sip. She wasn't trying to arrive already drunk at the party, only to loosen up a bit.

She and her friends have already posted their outfits; half of them were already at the party. Sofie took a deep breath, put away her phone and walked out of the door.

chiaraaraujo

liked by rebeccaamorim and 307 others

i am so stressed out #natalieportman

oliviaaraujo amen sister ⤷chiaraaraujo ���� ⤷sofiemartins 🦢🦢🦢

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rebeccaamorim

liked by pedri and 752 others

its halloweeen happy birthday stephen king

sofiemartins uhh so i just googled stephen king birthday and... uh... ⤷rebeccaamorim nah i got it right, shut up ⤷pedri 😂😂

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sofiemartins

liked by pablogavi and 326 others

🦄💗

luisafernandes girl marry me chiaraaraujo gatinha 🖤

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luisafernandes

liked by chiaraaraujo and 956 others

i'm your favorite disney princess 🩷

francisca.cgomes tão lindaa rebeccaamorim u the love of my life. fr.

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When Sofie walks into the party, she gasps with excitement. The decor was straight out of a Halloween movie. A fog machine was filling the room with mist, cobwebs were hanging all over the place. Jack-o'-lanterns grinned from every nook and cranny, their flickering faces casting playful shadows, giving the whole scene a spooky, dimly lit charm.

It was clear Luisa had gone all in to make this party amazing.

And the guests really brought their A-game in the costume department. Among the crowd, there was a wickedly realistic zombie, a time-traveling Doctor Who, a whimsical unicorn with a shimmering horn and even a comically oversized banana. The variety was as entertaining as it was impressive.

Music was thumping from the speakers, mixing old-school Halloween hits with some current jams, setting the mood for the night.

Sofie's eyes locked onto a familiar face in the sea of costumes – it was Pedri, dressed like a pirate and laughing at something Rebecca said. He looked a bit different since she last saw him, sporting a cool beard that suited him perfectly.

Sofie wasn’t surprised to see the two chatting; Becca and Pedri have been in a complicated long-distance situationship since they met in Ibiza, in the summer. But seeing the football player at the party gave Sofie goosebumps, as she tried to forget her own antics in the Spanish island.

She goes on to greet the couple.

“Cool beard, you really committed to the theme, didn't you?” Sofie jokes about his costume and Pedri laughs. “What are you doing in town, anyway?”

They were in Lisbon, far away from Barcelona, where he should be. Sofie half asks because she worries about her friend ending up heartbroken, but she’s mostly scared that his answer might get herself in trouble.

“We had a game here last night. Figured we could stay for the party.” Pedri winks.

We. There it was, what Sofie was scared of.

“We?” She asks, anyway, even though she knows the answer.

Pedri then tilts his head to the other side of the room, pointing at something. Or someone. When Sofie looks, she’s met with a figure standing by the door, somebody wearing a Ghostface costume. She rolls her eyes and looks back at Becca.

“I’m getting a drink, have fun you two!” Sofie says.

“Don’t get lost!” Becca yells and Sofie gives her a thumbs-up and a nod, but the moment she turns away, the music swallows her up. Luisa's mansion was like a maze. Sofie knew she was in for a tough time trying to do what Becca had asked.

The music was blaring, making it feel like she'd stepped into a nightclub. There were chill-out rooms with people sprawled on fancy couches, a glittering dance floor with a DJ dropping beats, and dimly-lit hallways that seemed to lead to who-knows-where.

Sofie's search for a drink brought her to a bustling room, where she was comforted by another known face, Chiara. She was dressed as Black Swan and deep into a lively, tipsy, philosophical convo with a small group of friends.

Sofie couldn't resist joining the shenanigans. "Hey, Chiara," she chimed in, with a wide grin, “what are you guys talking about?”

Chiara turned her swan-like gaze toward Sofie, her theatrical makeup adding extra drama to her expression. "Oh, you know, the meaning of life, the universe, and why we all wear costumes on Halloween," she replied, her words accompanied by giggles from her friends.

Sofie grabbed a chair and got cozy, all set to dive into the amusing and philosophical banter.

But the conversation didn’t last long; A muffled scream suddenly pierced through the party chatter, instantly grabbing their attention. Sofie and Chiara exchanged a concerned look.

"Did you hear that?" Sofie asked, her eyes darting around the room.

Chiara nodded, her curiosity piqued. "Yeah, that sounded pretty real. We should check it out."

They both rose from their seats, leaving their group of friends momentarily and headed in the direction of the mysterious scream.

Sofie and Chiara followed the sound down a dimly lit corridor. The place was spooky, and their nerves were on edge, so they just froze, waiting to see what would happen next.

They exchanged nervous glances, ears perked up, hoping to catch any hint of what had caused that scream. The whole scene felt like something out of a suspense movie, and they were bracing themselves for a sinister revelation.

“Hey,” 

The girls screamed at the voice behind them, as they jumped in shock. With a hand on her chest, Sofie took a deep breath, looking back to the figure standing now in front of her. Ghostface.

He took off his mask in a hurry. It was Gavi, and he tried to show them there was no need to be scared.

“It’s just me…” Gavi says.

Sofie and Chiara breathed a collective sigh of relief. Sofie was particularly happy to see that it was Pablo, and for a moment, she considered giving him a hug. But that thought made her freeze in her tracks, and her mind drifted back to their time in Ibiza, and the nights they shared. They hadn't talked since then.

“Is everything okay?” Gavi asks, torn between wanting to laugh at their reaction and genuine concern.

“We just heard something weird,” Chiara begins to explain.

Then, out of nowhere, loud banging noises erupted from the same place they'd heard the scream. The sudden, unexpected noise sent a fresh wave of tension through the group.

Sofie, swallowing hard, spoke up. "So, we came here to check it out..."

Pablo, shaking his head with a sly grin, says, "I don't know, I'm not super into the idea of investigating 'bang' sounds." He shot Sofie a knowing look.

“Do you think that that's somebody having sex?” Sofie asks, almost relieved at the possibility, since she had not considered it.

Chiara doesn't buy the theory, it doesn't sound to her like somebody is having a good time. “But if it's something serious, we should at least make sure everyone's safe." She says.

Pablo relented with a sigh. "Alright, fine. Let's check it out. But stick close, and let's not turn this into a horror movie cliche, okay?" He jokes.

With cautious steps, they followed the sounds down the corridor until they reached a closed bedroom door. The weird rhythmic banging noises were definitely coming from inside, and a mix of curiosity and fear gripped them.

Gathering their courage, they exchanged one last glance before Gavi, the designated leader of the group, slowly turned the doorknob. The door creaked open, revealing the dark room on the other side. 

When they pushed the door open, they were in for a surprise – a room filled with Roomba vacuum cleaners gone rogue. The little bots were spinning around, bumping into furniture, and beeping like they were part of some bizarre dance routine. It was like a small-scale robot rebellion.

Gavi burst into a loud laugh, "Seems like the robots have picked Halloween for their big uprising, huh?"

“That’s why I don't trust robots…” Sofie says, tip-toeing closer to Pablo, trying to avoid the bots.

“What about the scream?” Chiara couldn't help but bring up the initial reason for their investigation.

The group tenses up once again, remembering what brought them here in the first place.

"It was me," came a voice from the corner of the room. Luisa was sitting down, carefully wrapping a band-aid around her toes. "One of these things nearly took my toe out, and I don't even know how to turn them off."

With everything finally making sense, the group gathered their efforts to grab the rogue Roombas. After some trial and error, they successfully managed to turn off the little vacuum cleaners and carefully piled them up in a closet. 

luisafernandes

liked by pedri and 873 others

thanks everybody who showed up. it was the best halloween party ever. my vacuum cleaners literally almost unalived me. i love all of my friends so so much. happy halloween!

rebeccaamorim what was that in the middle? ⤷sofiemartins don't even worry about it pablogavi 👻 chiaraaraujo maybe like. get a broom or something

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Pablo and Sofie stayed behind after hushing the girls back to the party. In the dimly lit bedroom, it was just the two of them. Pablo sat at the edge of the bed, and Sofie stood by the window. They both felt the urge to talk but weren't sure where to start or what to say. The unspoken tension loomed in the room.

Should they bring up Ibiza? Or should they pretend like nothing happened? They exchanged glances every now and then but mostly remained silent as they gathered their thoughts.

"It's pretty crowded out there..." Sofie says, her thoughts interrupted by the party noise.

Gavi cleared his throat, nodding in agreement. "Yeah, I know... This is better. I prefer being alone."

Sofie couldn't help but giggle,"Well, you're not entirely alone. I'm right here, you know."

Pablo met her gaze and said, "When I'm with you, it doesn't feel like there's anybody else in the room." Gavi's face flushed like a tomato, and his eyes nearly popped out of his head when he realized what he had just let slip. "Do you... um, understand what I'm saying?" he mumbled, his words stumbling out as he anxiously awaited Sofie's response.

“I feel the same way.” Sofie says, her words escaping before she could even fully process what she was saying.

A palpable tension hung in the air as they locked eyes. It felt like an unspoken challenge to see who would look away first. It was like a silent game of vulnerability chicken, and neither of them was ready to blink.

In an instant, Gavi was right in front of her, his hand gently resting on her hips. His eyes pleaded for permission. Sofie, taken aback by his bold move, simply nodded, her eyes fixed on his lips.

He kissed her hungrily and passionately. Their minds immediately turned into a total mess, as they both desperately tried to savor the moment while also trying to let each other know just how much they'd missed this.

Sofie instinctively placed one hand on his chest, while running her fingers through his soft hair with the other. Pablo deepened the kiss, taking his time exploring her mouth and playfully licking her bottom lip.

He carefully guided her to the bed, lowering himself onto her. Their lips finally parted, leaving them breathless and flushed.

They stared into each other’s eyes intently. They couldn’t wait anymore. The desire between them was so strong, neither of them could speak. They both just wanted each other, no more holding back. 

Sofie grabbed him tightly by the neck, pulling him closer. After gasping for air, Gavi brought his lips to her again, his hands moving down her sides and gripping her waist firmly.

She took off her shirt and Pablo gently pulled off her lacy pink bra.

“I missed them so much.” Gavi jokes, looking at her breasts. Sofie gives a playful slap on his arm.

“I missed you too.” She whispers in his ears. She can feel the goosebumps all over his body as she says that.

“Are we really doing this?” He asks, tenderly kissing her neck. He can’t seem to keep his mouth away from her body for too long. He knows they don’t have much time together, he’s going back to Barcelona in the morning.

“I want you so, so much.” Sofie answers in between whimpers, she’s already too lost in pleasure to consider the consequences of what she’s doing.

“But we have to be quiet.” Pablo looks at her with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “If somebody hears us moaning, they might get worried for our safety.” He whispers. Sofie has to bite her lip to hold back a giggle.

“I can be quiet.” She promises.

Pablo enters her slowly, taking his time to enjoy every second of their reunion. They get lost in each other and it feels like their first time all over again.

She wraps her legs around him and digs her nails into his back, demanding more of him. His body starts rocking, slowly thrusting harder and faster until he loses control completely.

Their bodies move together easely. Sofie has to put a hand on her mouth to stop herself from crying his name out loud.

The sigh of her desperation is enough to drive him off the edge. He reaches down and starts massaging her clit, just like he knows she likes it. Pablo speeds up his pace, when he senses they’re both close to orgasm.

He collapses in her arms and Sofie holds him close as they reach their peak together.

They have their eyes closed and for a while the only thing on their mind is each other's heartbeat.

But then, Sofie feels her anxiety creeping in, and it is enough to break the magic surrounding them. "We should probably head back to the party," she whispers. To their ears, her words seemed louder than the music outside.

"Right," Pablo mumbles, eyes still closed, lingering in the moment for a little longer.

They quietly slipped out of the bedroom, making their way back to the party without exchanging another word. 

Even without speaking, as they get out of the bedroom, they share a sly, knowing look, hinting at the possibility of meeting again, without the need for words.

Sofie, without Gavi noticing, sneakily slipped a piece of paper with her phone number into his pocket.

[mypulisicz]

sparks fly - christian pulisic

you're the kind of reckless that should send me running

summary - after not ever being in love y/n finds herself tangled up in a situation with a certain american footballer.

pairing - christian pulisic x fem!reader

song inso - sparks fly (taylor swift)

warnings! - language, mention of being drunk and alcohol

word count - 1.6k

note - this is my first fic back from my hiatus and my first pic on this new account and i am more than excited to share this with you. missed u guys xx

-

he sat there. still.

"jamie, i'm so sorry... i just... i don't know.."

"don't what?! don't love me? y/n, a whole fucking year together and you tell me you don't feel anything?! what do you expect me to say to that? this is fucking bullshit!"

you sat there. still.

you knew that jamie always loved you more than anything, ad in your defense you thought you loved him too, but as time went on and the more time you spent with him the more you realized you never truly loved him, at least not the way you thought he deserved to be loved.

"whatever, y/n. i'm fucking leaving"

gone. another relationship gone.

you couldn't process your thoughts.

you knew what you did was wrong, but you still couldn't believe what happened.

why couldn't you love people? why did every relationship you've had feel meaningless? why do you still try to date people?

the second you got in your car to leave the restaurant you started crying. you felt bad for jamie but you also felt bad for yourself.

you always tried so hard to love, to feel something that could only be described as irrevocable admiration and not just being infatuated with someone for a short period of time.

𖤐

a few weeks went by and you were doing better.

as cliche as it sounds, you had been working on yourself and just getting back to be afloat mentally.

in fact, you had gotten an invitation to a party your friend mason was throwing.

you didn't know if you were going to go or not. mason is a football player and his social crowd is much different from yours.

after thinking about it, you thought you would go. it would be nice to get out for a weekend and just let loose a little.

𖤐

the night of the party finally came and you were feeling good. you felt confident. you felt pretty. and you felt ready to just have a good time.

you pulled up to mason's house and the house was booming with music and lit up by bright LED lights from every angle inside and outside the house.

one thing about mason is that he takes throwing a party to heart as if its his job.

if it were his job he would be getting a promotion every party because holy shit.

usually you would get just a little overwhelmed and anxious about the scene, but tonight it made you excited and it filled you with adrenaline. you made your way to the door. you first wanted to find mason and just thank him for the invite and let him know you were here.

you walked into the house and was immediately met with a giant crowd of people, and soon realized that your mission of finding mason was going to be a lot harder than you thought.

after looking for a good 10, 15 minutes you decided to give up for a little and grab some food.

there were surprisingly not that many people near the food table, so you took advantage of that to grab as much food as possible.just as you were about to leave to table, a guy who looked oddly familiar walked up.

"hungry? me too."

as lame as the comment was, you giggled a little.

"just a little"

you two exchanged awkward smiles, and you thought it would end there, but the man broke the silence with an even lamer statement.

"so, what's your favorite fruit?"

maybe it wasn't lame, but it was certainly... interesting?

"hmmm maybe an apple. they are never not good, y'know?

"yeah i totally agree..... i'm christian by the way"

"i'm y/n"

"nice to meet you, y/n"

"nice to meet you, christian"

𖤐

you spent the next hour talking to strangers and dancing. you were enjoying yourself way more than you thought you would. you did in fact find mason and you two talked for a good 20 minutes.

while you were talking to people the same guy, christian, came up to talk.

"hey stranger"

it was an ironic statement because you were, in fact, strangers.

"christian! how've you been?" one of the guys said.

from then on you just watched the conversation. it was interesting getting to know more about christian, and everyone in that group.

some more time went by and mason found his way over to you and the people you were talking to.

"oi chris, i see you met y/n"

"what's up. and yeah. she's great."

"is christian here being a dick to you or trying to start something?"

christian rolled his eyes as you sat there and let out a small chuckle.

𖤐

the party went on for a few more hours, and you were more than tired. you were very drunk and ready to just go home and get in bed.

you said goodbye to mason and the people you had met throughout the night, including christian, but right as you were about to leave you realized you couldn't drive. you were very much not sober.

"hey mase, i hate to ask you this but could you maybe drive me home, i've had way too much to drink and can't drive. not like this"

"yeah of course!"

as mass grabbed his keys christian walked up to the door to grab his jacket and disown keys.

"i thought you left?"

"yeah, well, i'm way too drunk to drive home so mason is giving me a ride."

"well i'm leaving now if you want me to just drive you home. if that's fine with you of course"

"um, yeah, sure, that's actually great, thanks!"

you got in christians car and were immediately meet with a surprising absence of awkwardness, as if you were already friends with christian.

"so where to ya live? in a non creepy way. i realize how weird that sounds to ask"

you let out a chuckle and told him where you lived and he started driving.

you two talked the entire way to your house. you had assumed he was one of masons teammates, but christian said he did in fact play for chelsea with mason. you also found out that you two had a lot in common. you both liked the same music, rap and country, which he found odd that an english girl liked country, and that you both had a bit of an obsession with chipotle. christian was also surprised to find out that you were part american. well, your dad was american, so it wasn't really that important or interesting, but christian thought it was wild.

when you finally got to your house you felt a wave of disappointment. you really enjoyed talking to christian. it was like you two had been friends for years. at least, that's how it felt.

"this might be weird to ask, but do you wanna come in?"

"sure"

christian smiled and walked in through the door, making you blush.

you fixed the both of you some microwavable taquitos and sat on the couch. you were watching a show, but not really watching it. you and christian talked for what felt like hours.

by this point you had sobered up quite a bit and you could finally start remembering the night as more than just a blur.

then it hit you that you were in your living room, eating taquitos, watching love island, with christian pulisic, who is your friend masons teammate.... and it wasn't awkward or weird.

one thing lead to another and the next thing you know, you and christian were all over each other.

there were these exploding, bright, but heavy fireworks going off between you. it was something you never felt before.

the two of you broke the kiss at the same, both gasping for air while simultaneously giggling.

you kept on thinking

holy fuck he's a good kisser.

𖤐

the next few weeks went by and you had gone on multiple dates with christian, and spent multiple nights at his house, and visa-versa.

you two had started to develop something more than just hookups and more of a relationship.

christian had invited you over to his house, which wasn't abnormal, so you didn't feel the need to get super dressed up. you but on some jeans, a sweater, and then did your hair and makeup. you then headed over to his house. christian greeted you with a kiss and wrapped his arm around your waist.

"you look good"

"thanks you too"

the two of you walked to his living room, and before being able to do or say anything, christian spoke.

"y/n, what are we?"

"huh?"

"are we just a casual thing, or are we more, because its been driving e crazy. i don't want to overwhelm you with this question, but if you don't mind, i would like an answer"

you sat there and smiled. you had been waiting for this conversation. you had been thinking the same thing, and where you didn't have a problem with being casual if that's what christian wanted, you did want to be more than just hookups and dates. you had felt something with him you hadn't felt with anyone else, including jaime.

"oh christian... i have been wanting to talk about this for a long time too"

"so? what are we?"

he moved closer to you. you moved closer to him.

faces just centimeters apart, both of you being able to feel and hear each others breathing.

"i want to be together. for real. i want to be fully with you, christian"

christian placed his hand on your cheek and moved his eyes from your eyes to your lips.

"i have never agreed with anything more in my life"

christian then placed his lips on yours in a gentle, yet eager way.

it was like you could almost see see the sparks fly.

[faegoddessog]

Daily Meal

 Warnings: Explicitly mature content, 18+ only, sex in public places, , unprotected PiV, (Play safe ya'll!) Light Dom/Sub, Oral sex (m &f).

Summary: Austin and gf have temporarily moved to New York, work is stressful for her. He has a tried and true solution.

A/N: Thank you to @slowsweetlove for the inspiration on this lil' one shot! I hope it lives up to expectation.

Please let me know if you see anything that needs attention (other than the fucking hot pic of Austin in a backstage setting that perfectly goes with this story that I wrote way before those pics came out.. magic!!)

She was sitting on the couch in their apartment, back to the door. It was bad Feng Shui, but it was the only place the robust piece of furniture would fit in the narrow New York apartment. They had rented it furnished and would only be here for about 9 months anyway.  

She loved going with Austin to his film locations when she could. She adored travel and exploration, but she adored Austin exponentially more. He was the most kind person she had ever met. The fact that he was beyond handsome and famous didn't even matter to her. He had amazed her from their first meeting. A meeting after which, he began to pursue her diligently. 

They had been in the City for just over two weeks now, under the guise of 'getting settled’. Really, they had come early because Austin had an addiction, theater. He had drug her out to shows nearly every night for the past two weeks before he started work on his new job. It's not like she hated going, she liked theater too. Just… whoa. She was at the point where she couldn't remember which scene belonged to which play. 

All that would slow down as today was the first table read of the new play Austin was starring in. Austin was so excited to be working on Broadway again. When he left that morning he was like a kid in a candy shop: smiling, nervous and buzzing. 

Tonight though, he promised her something different. He was going to take her to his favorite little hole in the wall place, they had live music every night and 'the best cocktails in town'.  

It was weird for him to want to be out so much, usually he was more of a ‘let’s stay in’ kind of guy. She supposed this was what theater did to him. 

Right now though, she had her headphones on trying to finish her remote work before he got home. There had been problems all day at the home office, deadlines had gotten moved up and her boss had put a lot of pressure on her to get them done. She had been frantically working all afternoon and felt like she was getting nowhere. Stumbling blocks and obstacles just kept popping up right and left. She felt like the project was slipping through her fingers. 

Austin traipsed down the hallway to their apartment. His day had been so good, the table read went amazing and the meeting after showed a ton of excitement built up about his new show. He was riding a high when he opened the door and saw her sitting on the couch, back to the door. 

He took a minute to look at her toeing off his shoes as per the rental agreement.  Her hair was up in a bun, the noise canceling headphones that she preferred to earbuds when working cradling her head. The wide neck of her shirt had slipped down, showing off her shoulders. The thin gold necklace that he had given her draped over the back of her neck gave him warm fuzzies.  

Damn he loved her. He was so happy that he got to bring his best girl with him on this project and share with her his love for theater. 

The fact that she could do her job anywhere was amazing. He loved when she joined him on location, though she only ever visited the set occasionally during filming. She said it was important that they had their own bits of life, she didn't want him to feel smothered or like she had to check up on him on set. In fact, she could never make him feel that way. In the past two years, she had become his rock, his solid base to cling to as he jumped into projects that scared him, that pushed him. 

He closes the door. She doesn’t turn, clearly sucked in. 

"Well shit!" she exclaims loudly, banging on her keyboard a little too vehemently,  obviously trying to make something work that was not working. 

Austin's eyes narrow in concern. She is usually quite collected, but the move and work had been stressful on her. 

He slips into the bedroom, then out again unnoticed, pushing something into his jeans pocket. Austin walks up behind her and lightly touches her bare shoulders. She jumps a bit, startled, and looks up. 

"Oh hey babe," she pulls her headphones off her ears, "how did it go?"

"It went well, I think it's gonna be a really good show," he says, "sounds like your day wasn't as great." 

"That's an understatement," she says rubbing the bridge of her nose, "the whole system just went down, again. So frustrating. I feel like I can't get a foothold on this project." 

He leans over the couch and closes the laptop, setting it aside. His lips brush her sensitive spot behind her ear. She closes her eyes, raises her hands to wrap around him and leans into his soft attentions. 

"Feeling out of control are you?" he rumbles in her ear, "I have something that might help." 

Before she can ask what, he slips his bracelets over her wrists. The ones that mean she doesn't get to make decisions until they come off.  The ones that signify he is in charge. The ones that mean she belongs to him. 

Two beautiful Italian-made leather cuff bracelets he had made in lieu of a collar. She did not like things tight around her neck, they had discovered. 

The cuffs could dangle comfortably loose, or they could be tightened with small decorative looking buckles if he needed them tighter. They had beautiful intertwining loops of leather with a couple rings of metal that Austin could slip his fingers into to control her or restrain her. Or he could clip them together with a carabiner. He was quite proud of his little invention, really.  She can stop it all with the murmur of their safe word, of course. But she was loath to use it unless completely necessary.  

She sighs as he slips them on,  pussy clenching, almost Pavlovian in response at this point.  God she loves him, he always knows exactly what she needs. Right now, she needs to not be in charge for a while. He must have had a really good day. He only got them out  when he was in a really good mood.  

"You know I wanted to take you out tonight, Doll," his hands slide down the front of her shirt, teasing her nipples, "but you aren't dressed yet. Oh hunny, what are we gonna do about that?" 

"Out? Aren't we staying in?" she frowned a little, shaking her wrists a little. She had never worn the cuffs out in public before.

"Oh no, we are going, and those are going to stay on. It's New York, after all. No one will think twice," he says, stepping to the chair opposite the couch.

"Yes, Austin," she says looking up at him, grateful to not have to make the decision. 

God he is beautiful. His tall frame is both lean and muscular, she knew he was stronger than he looked. Whether he had a little bit of scruff or he was clean shaven, his face was the very definition of handsome. He had a strong jaw, high cheekbones and the most adorable little corner mouth dimple on his left side. He was dotted with a unique constellation of freckles that she had been known to trace with her fingertips over his cheek and with her tongue as they dipped down his neck and onto his chest. His lips, oh lord, his lips were always soft and kissable. The sharp bow of his upper lip in opposition with the full roundness of the bottom one. He could do things with that mouth, things the mere thought of which had her wet. His newly darkened hair accentuated his piercing blue eyes. His new character was raven haired and he was nothing if not thorough in his preparation. His dedication to his craft was something she adored about him. 

"Now, you are going to peel down right here,” he places himself deliberately in the chair,  leaning back, long legs crossed, "then you will wear what I pick out." 

His thumb and long fore-finger outline his mouth, pulling his bottom lip out. Something he did when he was nervous or when he was looking at something that turned him on. Right now that something was her. He waved his other hand in a 'well get on with it' gesture.  

"Yes Austin," she said, standing up, "what first?" 

"Hmm, top," he said simply. 

They had played this game before. She knew he liked her to undress slowly and to touch herself when she did it. Her hand started at her waist, fingertips dragging the bottom edge of her shirt up, exposing the natural roundness of her belly. 

She was no impossibly thin supermodel, she was curvy, strong, healthy. He liked that about her, liked that she didn't conform to the California/Fashion/Hollywood standards he had grown up with. She marched to the beat of her own drum. She was hot as fuck doing it. He had noticed that since she was thrust into the public eye by dating him, she was starting to lead the pack in promoting body positivity, just by being herself. 

The hem of her shirt got caught momentarily on her naturally large breasts as she slowly stripped off her top. She hated wearing bras when at home. Her breasts bounced just a little as the shirt broke free. It was tantalizing to him. 

"Turn around," he said, "pull those bottoms down, both of them."

Her thumbs hooked onto the waistband of her joggers and panties. Pulling first one side down over her luscious hips, then the other to just under her ass. 

"Stop," he said quickly," mmm, pull those cheeks apart for me."

She grasped the roundness of her ass. The spreading sparking little sensations to her asshole and consequently to her pussy. She breathes out the tiniest of moans. She loves when he orders her to touch herself. 

"Down to your ankles now," he says. 

She steps back from the couch, more in the middle of the space and, bending at the waist, pushes her panties and joggers to the floor.

"Yes, show me that pussy, Doll," his deep voice starting to sound husky.

She steps her feet out of her clothes and then apart, pushing her hips back to him. Reaching back, she pulls her ass cheeks apart. 

"Oh my, baby, you look like you are wet, touch yourself and check," he directs. He has uncrossed his legs, manspreading in the most delicious way, giving himself room to grow. 

Reaching between her legs with one hand, she dips a finger into her seeping wetness, pulling away a string of moisture. 

"Oh yes you are," he breaths, "do you like being all bent over in front of me, Doll? Showing me that wet, needy pussy?" The sound of a zipper reaches her ears. 

"Yes Austin," her only reply. 

Austin's hands are on her hips, guiding her to his now fully erect, fully exposed lap. "Sit that pretty pussy down on my big cock." 

It was big; long fingers and hands do not lie, at least when it came to Austin. 

She nestles down onto him with a pleasure filled moan. The first taste of his cock in her pussy was always perfection for them both, and it only got better from there.

"Oh yes, baby doll, , such a good girl, so wet for me” he praises her, “clean that finger off sweetheart," he pushes her hand to her mouth. 

She turns her head to the side so he can watch her lick her juices. She moans around her finger as he slowly slides in and out of her. 

"Hands," his gruff voice says. 

She knows what he wants. She wants it too. She presents her wrists behind her. He laces the two fingers of one hand into the straps on both wrists. Pulling them tight behind her.

"Make me cum in that pussy baby, ride me," he leans back. 

Clenching his ass and pushing himself further upward, he gives her his whole shaft to ride. His thumb strokes the soft skin of her inner wrist. 

"Yes Austin,” she loves not having to think about what to do next. Getting her feet under her, she slowly rises and falls, savoring every centimeter of him.  The stress of the day forgotten as warmth percolates in her lower belly. 

"Fuck yes, god I love your wet cunt wrapped around my dick," he groans out. "Does it feel good doll?"

"Yes Austin," she moans through clenched teeth. Her hips gyrate in slow, wide circles as she slides him further into her. His head brushes past the singular delicious point on the front of her vagina. 

“Ohmigod!” falls from her lips as a shudder runs through her.  

"Don't you cum unless I say so," he struggles not to fuck her back, to let her do all the work. 

"Oh fuck, yes Austin," she moans. 

She had almost forgotten that part, it had been too long since he had taken the weight of the world from her shoulders. 

As she settles into a slow rhythm, Austin’s free hand slips around her ribcage, his long fingers pressing just under her breast. He steers her towards the pace he wants. 

“Yes baby doll, just like that,” his voice sonorous and deep. 

The exquisite ache starts to pour down his cock and coalesce deep in his groin. He takes a second to watch this gorgeous creature impaling herself on him. The muscles of her triceps popping  as he holds her arms. He can just see the sides of her tits, pressed out and bouncing.  He makes a mental note to have  a mirror to hang on the wall opposite so he can watch her fully. The idea makes his pelvic floor clench and his arousal heighten. 

“Oh god, oh fuck!” she cries out, his cock bouncing just a little inside her. It’s a small movement but it pings the nerves just right. It forces her muscles to contract deliciously around him, compelling her right up to her edge. The edge, she knew, that was not allowed to her, not yet. 

His chuckle came from deep in his chest. He knows she is getting close. He knows her cues, he made a study of her when they first got together, and he was nothing if not thorough. He fucking loves making her cum. 

Her clamping down on his cock makes him gasp.  Austin can’t help himself now, his glutes flexing and thighs straining, thrusting into her. The course of their movement falls naturally into him holding her still so he can fuck her.  He loves fucking her. The anticipation builds in him, the glorious pressure seeps into his lower stomach.

Her head is thrown back, her legs are shaking. His thrusts are perfection, pumping in and out of her, hitting her inside in a way that she just can’t emulate.   She loves it when he fucks her. Warmth rises to heat, swelling inside her seeking a crack from which to release. 

“Please, can I come, please,” she whines, toes curling, muscles tense trying to control the  pleasure wanting to burst out of her.  Wetness trickles down the base of his shaft and onto his balls, 

“NO!” his rasping reply through gritted teeth. He fucks her.

Her eyebrows draw together in a grimace, but the corner of her lips curl into a smile. Yeah, she loves this. This teetering on the edge, praying he will let her drench his cock. 

And he fucks her. 

“Ungh,” he groans out, “Fuck. Yes!” 

Even through the haze of pleasure she is attempting to override, she can tell when he is close. She knows every sound he makes, the groan in his throat when he is so turned on there is no stopping him. She knows the cadence of his thrusts, when his balls cling tightly to his body in preparation. She fucking loves making him so hot that he can’t help but chase his orgasm single mindedly. 

And he fucks her.

“Can I cum, can I cum, can I cum,” she starts to beg, moaning over and over. 

He knows she is practically cumming already. 

But he can’t answer. 

His thrusts start to stutter, he can feel the pressure building in his balls to the point of no return. Guttural animal noises are all that he can make as the release overtakes him, his body tense. His energy focused on the single point of pulsing and surging of his cum into her frantic pussy.

Finally, he manages to sputter out “Yes.” 

Her orgasm rockets from her as she fucks herself hard on his cock. Clenching him. Drenching him. 

“YES!  YES!  YES!” she is screaming. Spine writhing like a snake.

“Oh my fucking god!” Austin’s eyes roll back, he head lolling on the back of the chair, his now sensitive cock getting a pounding of its own. 

Finally she stills. Both of them shaking, twitching. He lets go of her wrists. She turns with ragged breath to curl up in his waiting arms. 

>>>><<<<

Austin held her hand, forefinger looped through the bracelet on her hand. They had somehow managed to avoid most paparazzi, though by now they just always assumed there would be photos of them. 

 They walked down the alleyway, towards the blue neon feline over a paint-splattered black door with a stenciled white outline of a cat. It looked grungy and unkept. She looked at Austin as though he was crazy. He just smiled at her, pulled at the door handle without a scrap of hesitation. 

She was wearing the outfit he picked out for her. A dark brown wraparound cocktail dress with capped sleeves and plunging neckline. The curved hemline of the wrap meeting in the front, forming an inverted V. Her legs flashed as she walked. He picked it because he could have easy and full access to her bare pussy. Of course he wouldn’t let her have panties.   She wore leather heeled sandals with straps that criss-crossed and matched the cuffs dangling from her wrists. 

The second they walk down the stairs and into the speakeasy, she knows why he loves it here. It’s like they were instantly transported backstage. Props and set pieces make up the decor, it’s dark and intimate. There is exposed brick and  ductwork and even a steel support beam bolted to its  concrete footing.  She half expects to see a rack of costumes roll by and actors with overly emphasized rouged cheeks hurrying to make their entrance, stage left. 

There is a stage in fact, a tiny one. There is a band playing and the place is pleasantly filled with patrons. 

The bartender greets him like an old friend. They exchange a few sentences and he introduces her. Austin never lets go of her hand. Almost as if she is an anchor for his introverted self in the metaphorical sea of people. 

They are shown to the most dark secluded round table with round couch seating in the back corner next to an egress that says ‘STAGE’ in grungy, scuffed lettering. He motions for her to take a seat.

“Peel that skirt slit back as you sit,” he whispers as he strips off his elegant black jacket revealing his basic white t-shirt underneath and the stitching detail on his black trousers. As he sits, he lays the jacket partially over her lap as though she was cold. It’s just a little extra insurance, the table hides most of her lap. 

He snuggles her in tight to him, his long legs crossed towards her. Her hand rests lightly on his thigh One arm languidly around her shoulders, the other resting high on her now bare thigh under his jacket.  He looks her up and down while they sit and enjoy the music for a minute, his fingers making little circles on her inner thigh. 

“You know Doll,” he leans in, lips close to her ear, “you look good enough to eat, I might just make you my daily meal.” 

Her arm curls her hand to play in his dark hair. The moment is  so intimate. She looks demurely down, pressing her lips together as his fingers graze her other ones under the table. 

The waitress walks over. They both smile up at her like he doesn't have his hand up her dress. 

“Hi, what can I get you two lovebirds,” she says, “Oh wow, I love your bracelet. Where did you get it.” 

“He had them specially made for me,” she grins at Austin. He just nods, not offering any more information. 

The waitress doesn’t note the plural. Austin orders  a lemon sour and the grilled maitake for her and decides on the fried quail and a green toki highball for himself. 

When the drinks are delivered, Austin removes his hand from her thigh and then replaces it with the one draped over her shoulders. 

“Wider,” he says smiling while handing her the lemon sour. Her legs part just enough so his hand can slip between them. As he sips, he pulses two fingers against her labia in time to the music.  

She  watches the  little stage, trying not to show her arousal on her face as she drinks. His pulsing becomes pushing as her wetness creeps onto his digits. Slowly sinking his long dextrous fingers over her clit and to the second knuckle inside her warm wet pussy over and over. It’s getting harder for her to keep her composure. 

Food arrives. He retracts his fingers, wiping them cursorily between her thighs. She notes that they still glisten as he pulls a piece of quail off with his hands. Looking her in the eyes, he licks his fingers off before putting the bite in his mouth. 

She knows what that beautiful tongue can do and hopefully will do later, if she’s good.

When they are done with their meal, she excuses herself to the bathroom, slickness lubricating her inner thighs.   She makes her way through the rabbit warren that is the underground of this building to find the restroom. She tries her best to wipe away her arousal, not that she is embarrassed, she loves being this wet for Austin. It’s just that she came dangerously close to leaving a wet spot  on the back of her dress. 

When she steps out, hair, pussy and makeup refreshed, Austin is there, coat over his arm,  in the tight hallway. He smiles and takes her by the hand, fingers looping into the leather at her wrist. He leads her, she is sure, in the wrong direction, away from the speakeasy. 

“Austin, I think it’s that way,” she says, pointing over her shoulder, forgetting the rules of their game. 

He stops near a door and looks at her with one eyebrow cocked. “Are you questioning me?” 

“I just don’t want them to think we aren’t paying… or … some…thing.” she says, her words falling off.

“Hmm,” is all he says. 

He pushes the door open staring at her, then nods his head toward the dark entrance.   He had been here before, and was hoping not much had changed. 

The door led into another darkened narrow hallway, then opened onto the backstage wing of this old theater.  There was a concrete ledge and exposed brick, even some graffiti. The leg curtains still hang, dusty, masking this little used space. 

The stage itself and the old seating area are clearly in the process of some kind of remodeling job. The lights are still on, blazing. Someone may still be at work here at this late hour. 

Austin walks a little, checking out the stage. She can tell the place is speaking to his theater blood. He places his jacket on the stone ledge.  He strides two steps toward her and leans against the stone to brick wall. With narrowed eyes, he looks her up and down. 

"Damn baby doll," the fingers of his right hand, glide across his bottom lip and chin as if trying to decide what to do with her, “about that daily meal.”

He reaches for her, pulling her against him. He flips her hair over her shoulder with the back of his hand, sliding it behind her neck and up to the back of her head. He presses her back to the wall. 

"Spread your legs baby doll," his lips brush her ears as he grasps her hair in a loose fist. 

The sensation on her head makes her shudder, the growl of his voice sends deep vibrations to her core. She steps her feet gingerly apart. 

"Lift your skirt, like a good girl," he kisses her cheek sweetly. 

Her fingers gather the front of her skirt into her palms. The cool air of the space feels good on her hot cunt. 

"Mmm, such a pretty pussy," he croons in her ear. Austin's long fingers brush the length of her outer lips.

"This is pretty dry baby,  do you not like our little game anymore?" he asks with almost a pout, patting her mons, "do you want me to stop?" He lets his hand drop to his side. 

"No, no, I love it," she says quickly. She grabs his hand and pulls it back to her, “please don't stop." She was too far into the scene now, he had built her up too much all night to just stop. She needed him, needed whatever he decided to give her tonight. 

"Tch, tch, tch,” his tongue clicks on the roof of his mouth, “oh Doll, did I say you could let go of your skirt?" He looks at her reprovingly, one eyebrow lifted, "questioning me, making up your own directions… oh no.” 

Whoops. 

"I'm sorry…Sir," she quickly gathered her skirt up again, bottom lip catching in her teeth. 

"Oh sugar, it's ok, or it will be in a minute," a devilish smile curls his lips.

Slap! His hand met her pussy with a sharp smack. The jolt sent electricity through her. She fucking loved when he slapped her pussy, liked it even when her bracelets weren't on. 

"Say it," his voice was stern as he pets her, his eyes locked onto hers in the dim light. 

"Austin," she breathes.

Slap! Her mouth curves slightly upwards as she jolts, chin tilting up. 

"Is," the word comes out more defiant than she meant. 

The hand in her hair tightens hard and pulls her head back, towering over her, his jawline set.  Moisture springs immediately to the waterline of her eyes. 

SLAP! Harder. Her leg shakes with the pain and pleasure of it. 

"Hnngh, In," more of a moan than a spoken word. 

Austin's lips brush hers. His tongue flickers out to wet her lips, then his own push gently against them. His lips leave, but his eyes remain close to hers. She can see her desire reflected in his eyes. 

SLAP! Hardest. 

"Charge!" the word squeals from her throat.

"Mmm hmmm, that's right Doll," he croons, staring at her eyes, "now, are you gonna be good and do as I say?”"

She would nod if she could, but his grip on her hair was just tight enough to restrict her movement.

“Yes Sir,” she breathes out. 

“That’s my girl,” he releases her hair and kisses her softly, lovingly, his hand rubbing soothingly on her tingly,  dry lips. 

“Hmm, maybe this little pussy  just needs some encouragement?” he rubs a deep circle over her mons. Zings of pleasure tighten in her. 

“Oh fuck,” slips from her mouth.

“Oh my, what a dirty mouth you have, Doll. Do I need to give it something else to do?” he asks, stepping back from her, fingers tapping the clasp at his waist. 

She stands there, looking down at his tapping hand, breath shallow. She is still holding her dress up, still exposed to him, for him. Gods she is beautiful, he was so smitten with her.  

She is trying so hard to be good.  All she really wants is to leap on him, make him fuck her until she fills the thearter with the cacophony of her screaming orgasm. It was easier to cum when she was loud. 

“Hmm?” he waits. 

Slowly, she raises her eyes to his, chin still pointed down, a little hungry smile on her lips. She just nods. She loves his cock in her mouth. 

His eyebrow twitches and a little moan sounds deep in his throat. If he wasn’t fully hard before, the look on her face made him so now. He pulls open the clasp quicker than he meant to. 

Fuck she made him want her so badly. He thought about just sinking his cock into her. Fucking her until she begged him to stop, then doing it a little longer. She would be loud in this cavernous place and probably alert everyone in a half mile radius. 

He took a breath, calming himself just a little.  Not trusting himself to talk just yet, he indicates the floor with his eyes and a little nod of his head.

She slowly gets down on her knees in front of him licking her lips in preparation.

“Open” he commands as he pulls himself out.  

He places his velvety head on her outstretched tongue. 

Her eyes look up at him, she knows he likes that. The tip of her tongue laps up and down on his frenulum, her mouth still wide open. His breath leaves him in a low moan as she gradually drags his cock further and further into her mouth. When his tip hits her soft palette, her lips close engulfing him. Her wet lips dragging along his dry shaft. 

Her hands are still on the hem of her dress, holding it up, exposing herself.  Afterall, he didn’t tell her to let go and she is trying so hard to be good for him.  

He holds himself at the base as she glides her head back and forth over his length. Her tongue rippling along his underside.  He hadn’t planned on fucking her mouth, he hadn’t planned on cumming until they got home. But the thrill of maybe being caught was exhilarating and she was so fucking good at this. He found himself holding her head still and thrusting into her. He tried not to make her gag too much, but when it happened it was so hot. 

She fucking loves this, loves his movement in her mouth, loves it when he gags her just a bit, bringing up that thick spit from the back of her throat. She is surprised when his hands go to her hair to hold her still. She didn’t think he’d go for it here. It’s hot, the way he loses control. She presses her lips over her teeth. Breath is seething through his teeth, she can tell he is close. 

Her tongue feels like some kind of wizardry along the underside of his shaft. Her eyes are closed, and he watches himself sink between her pretty pink lips. 

She is his good girl, his naughty girl. 

His.

“I’m gonna cum, I don’t want to see any of it leave your mouth,” he whispers to her. His head tilts back, as she sucks him long and hard. 

Muttered curses come from him in his last few thrusts. He surges into her mouth, hot and sticky.  She greedily swallows everything he gives her. As he pulls out, her tongue presses up on the bottom of his cock, milking the dregs of his cum onto her tongue. He groans.  She leaves her tongue out to show him. 

“Let me see that dirty mouth. What a good girl you are,” he pants, “Swallow it hunny.” 

She does, licking her lips. Fuck she is hot.

He pulls her up to standing. Wiping his thumb along her wet chin. Then kissing her mouth deeply.  Her hips are rocking back and forth lewdly, hands still holding her dress up. It is clear she is too far gone to just leave. 

He deliberately tucks his spent cock back into his pants. She lets out a little whine. 

“Such a good girl, swallowing all my cum. I think you earned a little reward, don’t you?” his fingers lightly play at the collar of her dress. 

She is practically seething with desire, if she didn’t have the bracelets on, she would have shoved him up against the wall and had her way with him. But all she can do right now is nod. 

“Use your words,” he admonishes, fingers tracing down the curves of her waist. “Tell me what you want.”

“I…” she pants, ”I need...” 

“What do you need, baby doll, tell me…” he urges her on.

“I need… I need to cum.” the last word exhaled out, barely audible. 

“Oh but baby Doll,” his pinky and thumb splayed to either side, he draws a long, slow line up her inner thighs. She shudders as his touch sends electricity up her spine. He stops just short. “You forgot to say please.” 

SLAP! 

Her pussy stings in the most glorious way. 

“Start over,” he says low in her ear. 

SLAP! 

“I need..” she moans SLAP!

“to cum…” she is shaking

SLAP! 

“Please!” her voice a whine.

SLAP! 

“SIR!” The last impact is like stinging rapture.

“Shhhh, that’s better, my good girl,” he says quietly in her ear. “I’m gonna make you cum, but you have to be quiet. Understand?”

Her eyes go big for a second, she is terrible at being quiet, but she is shaking with the wanting of him, she won’t make it home in this state. She just nods, biting her lip,  hoping she can. 

He backs her up to the stone ledge, grasping her inner thigh, he lifts her leg so that her foot is on the ledge. She is more exposed than ever, wide open for him. 

“Keep your hands on the ledge,” he whispers in her ear. 

He falls to his knees in front of her. 

“Well that did it baby doll, you are dripping now. You must like me in your mouth, yes?”

“Oh yes sir,” she whispers. 

“Do you like it when I punish this pretty pussy” he asks, looking up at her. 

She just whines and nods, not trusting herself to speak.

“I’m gonna clean this up now, you stay quiet.” 

He licks long strokes up her pussy, strings of moisture sticking to his tongue. With one hand, he spreads her labia wide. He can see her glisten, even in the dim light. Knowing he doesn’t need to gently warm her up, he dives right in. He presses his mouth to her, his nose buried against her mons. The middle of his tongue rolling wide just below her clit. God he loves the taste of her pussy. He could lick her all night. 

The instant his tongue hits her, her supporting leg nearly gives out. Thankfully the ledge is there to hold her up. 

His tongue reaches back, pushing into her as far as he can go. He laps up toward her clit, bringing her juices along.

God he is good at this. She is lost in the motions of his tongue against her. Her lips pressed tight together, trying not to moan. She could let him tongue fuck her into oblivion. 

He traces a circle around her clit. Then two fingers push their way into her wet slit. Her spine curls over him as thrilling tension fills her. He flicks her clit with the tip of his tongue, then rubs with a wide tongue, fucking her slowly with his fingers.  

Her head is tucked forward, body clenched tight, the heat behind her clit collapsing in on itself. 

“Please can I come? Please?” she barely whispers. 

“Mmmhmm,” he nods, looking up at her. Holy shit, his blue eyes against that black hair looking up at her from between her legs? Divine.

Little outpourings of her juices start to soak his hand. He sucks her clit into the vacuum of his mouth, licking, licking, licking. Fingering her faster. 

He can hear a quiet, high pitched nasal whine, her teeth clamping down on the meaty pad of her thumb. Suddenly she is jerking against his mouth, exploding, thrusting her gushing cunt onto his fingers. It’s all he can do to keep contact with her wild gyrations. 

Eventually, she slows, as does he. He stands up, adjusting his now once again hardening cock. He puts his arms around her, holding her close as little aftershocks yank at her core. 

“There’s my good baby Doll.” he whispers lovingly in her ear.

She curls into him, panting quietly. 

Then he hears voices float down from the back of the theater. 

“Yes sir and as you can see we have already started renovations here.. Let me take you down and show you what we plan to do with the stage area.” 

“Very good, how much longer will all this take?”

His eyes go huge. She is still oblivious, coming down off her high. 

“Shh, we have to go,” he whispers to her. He grabs his coat and drags her quietly with his wet hand to the cramped, dark  hallway where they came in.  As they reach the door, they can hear the voices. 

“What are these water drips on the floor?” 

“Oh, um… I don't know we’ll have to check if there are any pipes up there”

“I was told this building was sound…”

Austin opens the door back near the bathrooms of the speakeasy, lips pressed together. Once the door shuts behind them he breaks out in giggles, dragging her away from the door. 

“Holy crap, that was close,” he says. 

“I didn’t see any water on the floor?” she is still slightly befuddled. 

“Oh baby, that was you all over the floor,” he tells her with a knowing smile. 

Her mouth drops open. She stops and  down at her splattered legs and covers her laughter with her hands. 

“Whoops” she says, still giggling, leaning on the wall. 

“Whoops is right,” he pulls a strand of hair away from her face. Holding her hand, he unbuckles one, then both bracelets from her wrists. They slip into his pockets. 

“I think I’d like to take you home and take my time to make love to you, if you are ok with that.” 

“Mmm more than ok,” her smile is huge and warm, “thank you Austin, I really needed that.”

“You are welcome, I’m sorry it’s been so long sweetheart,” his hand comes to her face, “and in case I haven’t said it, I am so thankful you are here with me, enduring the chaos that is sometimes my life. I love you so much.” 

“It’s our life, Austin,” she says with soft eyes, “and I wouldn't have it any other way. I love you too.”  

Their lips press together in a soft, sweet kiss. 

[sputnikbeomie]

bsd beast lightnovel spoilers //

so,, i just finished reading beast and I am...damn that was so good, far better than I expected

there's so so much I want to say about it, and wish I had annotated it but instead I took a few pics of pages when I could remember to 😭

I don't think I'll ever be able to look at the scene in the anime where oda throws akutagawa over his shoulder the same ever again...the fact dazai actually did achieve death in this book,, the way dazai knew about the book and all the parallel worlds outside of the beast one...the scene where dazai said "for this is the only world where he's alive and writing" actually made me tear up. I think out of the whole novel that scene in particular really got to me, especially after the scene in the bar and dazais emotions are shown so clearly on his face when talking to oda, and just the whole explanation of the book and other worlds (including this particular world) when explaining to both aku and atsushi was just so well done

For me, I considered it rather that of a plotwist reading the whole book only to get to the end for that to be said. And asagiri's own notes at the end of the novel too...what if atsushi was a woman, what if the ada was on verge of bankruptcy, what if chuuya joined the ada alongside dazai when he first left after odas death? Like. Although this was an au, its events are still canon. They're canon because asagiri himself wrote it to show what if... and the fact he purposely has dazai mention the book and the other worlds...even when he starts clapping after shin soukokus fight saying "that's as good as, if not better, than the ship fight you two had"

LIKE?!?!? And the way asagiri literally confirmed that no matter how many au's there are...how oda is dead in every single one of them but beast...I'm crying. I could still go on and on and write actual essays about this book but yeah. I have so much more I wanted to say but my brain is so beautifully overwhelmed rn by the world and novel that is beast. All those thought aside, I would just like to also say how I absolutely love aku's character design in this 😭 his clothes were so well done...and his personality too 😭😭 I just loved this side of him

ANYWAYS after all that being said (I'm sure I have so much more I wanted to say too but I just can't comprehend rn,,)

I'm going to finally start stormbringer !! Time to cry from what I've seen so far 🫶🫶 I'm so excited to read it hehe, and I'm sure I will be even more gobsmacked after finishing that lightnovel than I was beast so 🤧 (I also posted this whole thread on twt lmao but I just needed somewhere to vent cause I have no moots to talk about this with let alone the lightnovels 🤧

here I go 🫡🫡 onto stormbringer

[scammydoesstuff]

Saw your post about meeting Neil and honestly to say he only cares about Astarion is kinda I dunno... not cool. I mean Astarion of course means a lot to Neil because he's been with him for more than four years! He means a lot to Neil because I don't know maybe the fact that the man has poured a lot of his time into a character that was so faceted and deep has something to do with it? I don't think it's really fair of you to say that he only cares about Astarion now since he's new, because if that were the case then he'd have stopped caring for Astarion as soon as Fibonacci from Warframe entered the scene or other roles he has done post Astarion. I met Neil and I didn't whine or cry about him not having any Kamski or Simon Walker or Luke Davenport pics when I met him at the Game expo back in Feb, especially since his role as Simon Walker meant a lot to me. Heck I didn't even cry about him not having any Nyx Ulric pics for my friend who's comfort character is Nyx (Neil did all the mocap for him). At least you got a Resident Evil photo. And heck if anything you could have looked on his Streamily that usually gives everyone an idea of what prints he might have.

As for him not being oh my god shocked at your plush, have you any idea how many people that man meets at every con who shove things they've made of his characters in his face? He was probably tired but he did attempt to do the voice for you! Is there no gratitude in that? Neil is a human being, he doesn't OWE you anything, he's not a dancing monkey and you as well as all of his other fans should be thankful that he cares to even come to conventions and spare a few moments of time to meet us all given his work schedule.

Instead perhaps maybe realize that your disappointing interaction with him is all on you and not Neil himself. Any one else who's met him all seem to be happy they even got to stand before him and share a moment with him. Your moment with him was ruined by your own expectations of someone who is just a normal human being.

Cool. Thanks for the comment.

I definitely agree with you that I was disappointed as a result of my own expectations and I fully acknowledge that I took it way too personally. I could swear I mentioned as much in that post or at least the follow up in the ask I received after, but maybe I didn't. In which case; my bad. Should've been more clear on that.

The other thing I could've swore I've mentioned in regards to this whole weekend was that I was already in a bad mental state at the time. The interaction with Neil was just something that put me over the edge. That's also on me and I'm not blaming Neil for anything I was going through. Just that I was already having a bad time and that didn't help. I was very excited to finally meet him because I hadn't had the opportunity to do so after Resident Evil Village came out until literally this weekend. He otherwise hadn't come to any conventions near me that I was aware of (though, maybe he did and I just genuinely didn't know. Really hard to say at this point). Also, not to beat a dead horse or anything, but he was advertised for both Baldur's Gate III and Resident Evil Village as you can see in the screenshot below. So...fuck me for thinking he'd have prints for the games he was advertised with, I guess...

Now, while I understand Neil's attachment to Astarion - I saw a few streams of his when he played through RE8 and he was talking about him even back then - I can't deny that I do kinda find it shitty to just ignore the characters that came before that people still love. It's also very odd to see any voice actor doing things like this. Like, we met Roger Craig Smith as well this weekend and my boyfriend got the one print he had available for Hirako Shinji from Bleach. That's a character Roger hasn't voiced in, like, a decade, but when he saw the print my boyfriend chose, he got really excited. Despite pretty much everyone else coming up wanting autographs for Sonic, he was still excited about this character he doesn't even voice anymore and who he doesn't have much of a connection to at this point in time. It still meant something to see someone showing love for that character and he was excited by it. So for Neil to really only focus on the one, most recent character and not really show much attention to the others was just kinda surprising and very much against the norm. It's not a bad thing necessarily. Just not what I expected, as you so eloquently pointed out.

I'm genuinely sorry if anything I said offended you. I wasn't trying to start anything with that post. I was just sharing an experience from a weekend that was overall rough for me. I thought that was the point of a personal blog, but maybe I'm wrong there too...

All I wanted to do was get out the negative feelings and move on. At this point, while I'm still disappointed about that interaction and definitely regret going to this convention at all (I definitely wouldn't have if I'd known he wouldn't show much interest in his older characters), I'm mostly over it and I'm moving on. It happened, it was a bad time, and it's over. It doesn't make me 'hate' Neil Newbon or think ill of him nor would I discourage people from meeting Neil if that's what they want. You're right, he doesn't owe me anything. I acknowledged in my previous response and extensively in the tags on the original that I still think Neil was very nice and I know I'm the outlier in all of this. It was a long day. He was probably really tired. He'd already met so many people that day alone. It was the end of the day. Et cetera, et cetera. Like, there are so many variables here that contributed to that interaction winding up bad for me and I don't blame Neil for them.

TL;DR: *I* had a bad time and just wanted to vent with an art piece that made *me* feel better, but I don't hate Neil nor do I think Neil's a bad person and I'm glad other people who met him this weekend had a good time with their interactions.

Hope that cleared a few things up...

[golbrocklovely]

Tbh on this whole Sam and Katelyn situation, i have no real opinion, cause obviously some bigger things must have happened behind the scenes, cause i doubt that Sam reacted this way just like this. I mean he wasn’t acting this way with Katrina and Colby didn’t unfollow her either. It’s a shame it was taken to social media and that Sam at least didn’t add to his message smth like “we are broken up, but please do not hate” yk, but tbh guilty is on both side. Katelyn was the one who kinda stirred into the pot which was a dumb move from her, because if she knows that Snc have bigger fandom made mostly of young girls who are basically in love with them, she should be more protective of herself and if she wanted to be petty, she could do it privately. Sam response was meh.. could be smth more mature for sure, but i could bet that something just happened behind the scenes, because even Colby unfollowed her, which is like weird to me, considering once again that Colby still follows Katrina who made a a song about Sam after their breakup (which is so good btw)

I am no hater of Katelyn or any of the girls around boys (i am here for ghosts and demons, not delusion) and didn’t send her any, don’t worry. I just say that i think people should stop taking any sides and be angry at people when they do not know the full story. Something must have happened bts that made both snc angry and it’s not our business to know, so i think it’s better to just move on and focus on the upcoming videos (especially am excited for the one with triplets )

i mean, i agree with you that there's definitely more that happened bts that we don't know about. every relationship is more than what it appears to be. only katelyn and sam know the real story on what happened.

the thing is, it's hard to compare relationships bc kat and sam one, ended on good terms (all things considered) and two, were together for almost a decade. so bc of that, there is a level of respect there, a level of friendship that was there, that katelyn and sam didn't quite have. and colby clearly unfollowed katelyn bc of her posting the pic, since it was so out of left field given that her and sam had been broken up for a couple weeks (by my guess).

like i mentioned in my other asks on this, what katelyn did was dumb. while i found it funny in the moment, i never thought it was the smartest thing for her to do. it was petty and childish and odd. i've never denied that once. that being said, she was always gonna be the loser in this scenario. not only did she lose the guy, but on top of that has been hated since the minute she came into the fandom, well before she did things that ppl claim are the "real reason" they don't like her (whatever that case may be). not only that, she doesn't have any true supporters. she gained an audience of both lovers and haters bc of sam. and while sam had every right to post his comment, or to post that story explaining he was single, there does come a certain point where in my opinion, he took it too far.

once he liked a post claiming katelyn was not a good person, she doesn't deserve all he did for her, she took advantage of him, she's a bad influence (which let's be honest is fucking rich coming from snc lol) AFTER liking a post that was nicer to both of them a couple hours earlier… that's where i think he did more harm than good. bc his fans saw that shit and literally all agreed that this was him giving the green light to hate on her more than they had been. and again, katelyn was never gonna win. i mean for fuck's sake, she was getting hated on before she ever posted the photo. and she wasn't even dating him anymore. and sam was only getting hated on this past year because he was dating her.

was it dumb for her to post the pic? yeah. but it was also dumb for sam to like a post basically saying "yeah go ahead and hate her, she's the worst". he has MILLIONS of fans. the only fans she has are ppl who are fans of him. who do you think ppl sided with?

and that's not to say that she's a good person in all of this. she probably did things she shouldn't have in the relationship. and vice versa, if we're honest. but she couldn't have done anything that bad considering the fact that colby was still following her up until she posted this.

like i've mentioned before, pettiness comes out of hurt. and clearly both of them are hurting, so i do feel for them there. but if i'm honest, i just expected sam to remain quiet on this, like he does with literally everything else. the comment made sense, the story was fine, everything afterwards felt like jabs to knock her down a peg.

and sure, she's posted clips that have been filmed by him and unarchived shit that was about him. big whoop. she still lost. i'm not on either of their sides, but i feel for katelyn a little more than sam.

[paperstorm]

i understand that if you really convinced yourself of something you start seeing "clues" everywhere without being able to look at those "clues" neutrally. happens to everyone doesn't it? and if those rumours about sierra end up being true forget everything i said and tell me "i told you" and it's alright but i looked a bit through the things people took as evidence for sierra leaving and.. i don't see it?

i did some research and the summary and short version basically is: there are no bts pictures of sierra, sierra hasn't been seen on set in any of the casts posts and gina made a post for her birthday wishing her well for the future

neutral explanations: it seems like so far the focus is more on rescues and fire/ems stuff rather than family/relationship stuff. obviously sierra won't be on set for those. it's similar to rafael. besides the one pic from his trailer that he shared we haven't seen him either. we only know tarlos scenes are happening bc ronen talked about it at the convention but press season hasn't started yet so there is no place for sierra to talk about the show. and she's never been big on social media documenting everything she does so she wouldn't put out random statements or teasers about grace's storyline in the new season on there. in the past she would post a pic from her trailer every once in a while but she never really shared stuff while filming so that's not new. also grace isn't in all the episodes so my neutral explanation is she literally just hasn't been on set much and hasn't had any scenes with the others yet. and if they're filming grace/judd stuff then jim isn't sharing anything either for obvious reasons. (btw there are more recent posts about grace/judd on the official ls account than there are about tarlos for which it has almost been a year since the last post)

and i read gina's birthday post as genuine and normal birthday wishes. celebrating the person and wishing them well in life. that's what you do isn't it? sierra also commented on the post and said she was excited to see everyone at her party which again i am just going to put under the "she hasn't been on set much sharing scenes with the others yet" file.

something else i've seen a while ago that i just remembered was someone said that filming started and sierra still had braids and grace doesn't have braids so she isn't filming. which? gina had so many different hair styles as tommy why can't grace have another hairstyle in the new season as well? but again even if it is just sierra's hairstyle then i am going to add that to the "she hasn't been on set yet" file.

so as i said i fully understand spiralling. been there - done that. and it's what happens in fandom spaces isn't it? looking for little crumbs and drawing conclusions. but at this point i think people are mainly stressing other fans unnecessarily by creating these rumours. and again: if they turn out right forget everything i said and i'll apologise. but i'd wait for official statements or other proof that sierra is or isn't part of the new season. ya'll are giving yourself ulcers otherwise.

Yes all of this! I understand speculation is natural especially when we've all gone so long without any information but it's just bad science to draw a conclusion based on a lack of information or to find patterns out of gaps that you think should be filled. Nobody would accept a hypothesis proved by 'well it can't be disproven.' I see no reason at all to suggest Grace won't be in season 5 other than fans missing their fave and spiralling.

[neo-neos]

My BL journey so far

Okay kids gather round, get comfortable. This is a long one.

Disclaimer/background info: I started watching BL about a month ago-ish. I don't remember the exact date but I believe I started last month or maybe the end of the month before. So I am still a bit of a noob and trying to catch up with watching things. I am also a very chaotic person which you will probably find out by the way this is structured/written. Lastly, even though I do study/teach English for a living, it is not my first language.

Okay with that out of the way, let's dive in.

Backstory/introduction

Like any good story I feel like a bit of backstory/intro might be a good idea. Hi, on the internet I mostly go by the nickname Peach, however I created this blog when I got into BL and have adopted yet another fruit as a new nickname for this side of my personality/identity which is Lychee. I don't really mind which one you use. I'm 24 years old and I am Dutch (the Netherlands). As mentioned in the disclaimer I teach English but I am also still a student, I plan on studying more after this because I love learning new things and especially about languages and cultures. I am part of the LGBTQ+ community myself and mostly identify as Bisexual or Pansexual. I use she/her pronouns. When I was about... 13-14 ish I rolled into the K-pop fandom. I used to listen to bands like SHINee, Super Junior, EXO, BAP, Infinite, Girls Generation, 2ne1, Block B... I was a real fangirl if you ask me HAHA. In this time I also watched a Kdrama or two here and there. Favorites being: Heartstrings and Shut up flower boy band. (I was never too into Kdrama back then). I also used Tumblr back then, I have a literal 12 year old tumblr account with almost 50K posts that I used during my K-pop times. I stopped using tumblr quite a while ago too but that blog is still there. I would reblog gifs and pics and what not about my biases and ships. But as interests do sometimes, it faded into the background and I fully stopped keeping up and listening to K-pop. It has literally been 10 years now.

But then...

One random afternoon I was bored at home and wanted to watch something new. I randomly realized Kdramas existed and so my journey to find one began. I stumbled upon Semantic Error and almost by accident decided to read the little description and the tags that were with it. My eyebrows furrowed for a minute before I could feel my eyes widen: "WAIT THE TWO BOYS... IT'S... GAY???" I could almost not believe what I saw. Obviously back in my K-pop times every band had ships and pairings you fangirled over, Baekyeol or ChanBaek, 2Min, JongKey... You know what I mean...You fangirled over every random moment they were together but that was as far as that went. So you could maybe imagine my excitement when I realized that Korea has come far enough to actually make BL shows now. So without further thoughts I watched Semantic Error. And because it was the first BL I saw I fell in love with it, the story was good, the acting was good, the fluff was to die for. An all round great experience to start off with.

Little did I know...

After this experience I was obviously hungry for more. So, I turned to the internet to tell me where they had been hiding this secret stash of everything I ever wanted in Kdrama... And boy was I surprised with the results. This was the moment I found out that not only Korea but also Japan, Thailand, Taiwan and China made BL shows... And not just 1 or 2... The choices were endless. My journey continued with (either... I kinda forgor...) Don't say no and Love by Chance. This was my first experience with NC scenes too. I had no idea that Thailand already took the step to also go into a little more 18+ when it comes to BL and to be fair... I was kind of excited about it. Now that I have seen more BLs I guess you could argue that neither Don't say no and Love by Chance are the best BLs ever made but at the time I was completely hooked on them.

And so began...

An insane marathon sprint. By this time I wanted more more more and that's what I consumed. I watched some more Kbl, some Japanese BL and some more Thai BL's as well. Until I hit KinnPorsche and that's when I realized how hooked I actually was on this new comfort genre I had just discovered. KinnPorsche allowed me to put the shows I had watched for far into perspective. Most BLs have the university students falling in love drama vibe... KinnPorsche was something completely different and boy did I fall in love, and hard too. This show quite honestly changed a lot of things for me. I went from 'I'm just casually watching these shows' to 'Oh I might be a little obsessed now' and after finishing KP I realized I wanted even more and I could no longer deny that I was becoming a part of the BL fandom.

So where we are now...

In the past month I have spent every free second of my day watching shows. Binging one after the other. I was lucky to have a week off during this time too and I have managed to COMPLETE 32 BLs between then and now. 5 currently watching shows I try and keep up with and a TO WATCH list of 40+ shows. (aka: obsessed much?)

In the meantime I have made a BL twitter and a BL tumblr (this one) to find out more about the BLs I watched or am watching currently, but also to keep up with new ones coming out. I have realized that because of how badly I want to keep up with things I SUCK at remembering names. If the show did not leave a big impression on me I can also easily forget the whole storyline of some. This in addition to people talking about ship names but also IRL ship names using actors real names makes it quite hard to keep up sometimes.

The community...

I also made these accounts in the hopes to interact with the community. This part has been quite a challenge for me. I have never been the most extraverted person (both irl and online) but I am one of those people that is almost desperate to make friends (that sounds a bit sad but hear me out.) I love talking to people (< but you said you're introvert.. I know again, hear me out) but I have absolutely no idea how to behave in order to make friends. I am often too shy to interact with people so I just kind of pull myself back and hope someone reaches out first. As soon as they do there's a good chance I will latch onto them without mercy. I have realized that I am afraid I do not fit in sometimes within this community (mostly on twitter to be honest) I see a lot of very knowledgeable people when it comes to BL shows and I am too afraid to interact. Here on tumblr and twitter I also (after literally 10 years) realize how talented people are when it comes to making gifs, edits and translations. Something I did not really think much about when I was using Tumblr 10 years ago. I have so much admiration for what people make but at the same time I feel like being a cheerleader from the sidelines by reblogging/retweeting I cannot match up to them too. Now I am obviously very new to BL and the community and I have actually met some lovely people already. I guess I just want too much too fast haha!

BL as a whole... (Disclaimer: The things I talk about are not just directed at BL alone, the issues I list are VERY MUCH also alive in Hetero shows and I would like to see change there too. But to keep on the topic of BL I list them here with my reasoning)

Realizing how far these countries have come when it comes to even making shows about LGBTQ+ is an awesome thing to see. Like I said before I come from the time where all I could really do is ship two band members together and fangirl over them sitting next to each other basically. I am part of the LGBTQ+ community myself and I live in a country is supposed to be very accepting so it is nice to see the steps different cultures are taking as well. However I do feel we are not there yet in the way they portray things. Consent (this is obviously not only a BL problem) has been a bit of an issue for me in some shows. Power dynamics - My main issue show for this one was Cutie Pie (not very sure how to elaborate further) NC scenes - Still being quite unrealistic sometimes, you really cannot tell me that bottoming is something you do without preparation of any sort. Only gay for xxx -> Straight but gay for this one man is not exactly how sexuality works. I feel like it might kind of give off the wrong idea as well. I do see that some of these trends are turning to the right direction (Between Us being a good example for consent for example)

Now I obviously know that these are fictional stories so please don't come for my throat over this. I am just listing a few things I have noticed in my journey.

The shows...

Now I would like to use this last little section here to mention and give my thoughts (positive and negative) about some shows I have seen. Let's start with the good shall we.

KinnPorsche -> I have mentioned this show before but I would like to do it again. I fell in love with this show, the actors are amazing, the storyline is great, the chemistry between the couples, the diversity in the storyline, the humor, the serious moments... It has so much and the casting they did for this show is a legit 10/10 Apo is such an amazing actor, Mile is his perfect match for the role and don't even get me started on the rest of the cast I would probably pull up an entire powerpoint presentation.

Life-Love on the line -> Is a Japanese BL that I related to quite a lot. The entire story of how two boys fall in love and grow up together, one becoming more serious while the other stays quite 'childlike' hit me right in the feels (I don't want to spoil things) It was such a beautiful story to be fair.

Semantic Error -> My first BL and what a great start to have to be honest. Need I say more?

Bad Buddy -> I loved this one because of the storyline and the awesome chemistry between the characters. It showed an amazing story of how sometimes you need to put your prejudice thoughts aside to find something beautiful.

Blueming -> The way this story unfolds made me fall even deeper in love with Kbls to be honest. The way this was filmed was just so beautiful.

Roommates of Poongduck -> I was a little hesitant in the beginning of this one. The storyline description did not grab my attention and after seeing how KBL is often focused more on the story than on the passionate kisses for instance it took me a moment to get into it. But we have all seen the kissing scene (that they robbed us of to be fair) and the chemistry between the characters had me sobbing while having the biggest grin on my face.

I told sunset about you -> When I got a little deeper into my research the name of this BL kept popping up everywhere and it obviously got me curious. Boy oh boy this was such a beautiful story I cannot even begin to explain. The exploration of sexuality, gender, love and friendship in this one... Ugh ugh ugh.

Not me -> A masterpiece. The themes, the storyline. They touch upon heavy topics while also maintaining an entertaining series. It's so good.

Love in the air -> Okay so, MOST of the shows above have a lot of deeper messages or storylines and love in the air might feel out of place. WRONG. Sky's storyline shows quite a bit of deeper meaning and I think it was done really well. The other part of why I like this show is because of the actors. They really did such an amazing job with this one and I cannot wait to see more of them.

ChocoMilkShake -> (up until last ep) this was my comfort show. I kind of ignored the dark side of them leaving and just focused on all the cute stuff but I just love it. They better give me a happy ending though!

Between Us -> I have seen UWMA and I must say that although the story was very very beautiful and touching and heavy... I did not vibe with the insane drama as much as I would have hoped. I did however enjoy the WinTeam moments quite a bit. And then BOOM Between Us happened and I am having a blast with this one. Consent being a big plus. The storyline is good, there has not been (knock on wood) unnecessary drama (I was afraid this would happen with the overhearing half a conversation thing they were giving us but I am SO happy to see it was done in a mature way). I love it.

And now for some shows I would like to give a tiny piece of my mind. DISCLAIMER: These are opinions you can ignore, I am not shitting on actors whatsoever, this is mostly targeted towards writing/storyline. THE ACTORS DID NOTHING WRONG!! I am okay with people asking questions about it though (: I also do not JUST shit on the shows I talk about here, I point out some things and also say what I DID like about it

Lovely writer -> This show holds a scene that I find THE MOST frustrating one I have seen so far. "Let me explain" -Silence- "I can explain" -Silence- "Wait don't leave" -Silence-.... If you have seen the show you probably know what I'm referring to. This is what I mean with unnecessary drama. Characters being angry at each other for longer than needed or for a reason that does not make sense. The rest of the show was okay. I don't hate the show but it frustrated me more than that I enjoyed it.

Big Dragon -> The first episode had me screaming. The NC scene, the open kink representation on this one made me so excited. It felt like the next step towards representation for kinks within the genre... And then that slowly died off. The scene where Yai is with the girl that (I suppose) normally helps him with his kink and then the bathroom scene where Mangkorn orders Yai around were 10/10 too but then it was gone and we were back to quite the normal BL plotline again which I found very sad. In the later episodes I also missed the chemistry between Yai and Mangkorn. I fucking LOVE MosBank together like... They are legit amazing actors and I would love to see them again in something different. I am just a little disappointed in the storyline progression.

Cutie pie -> The power dynamic in this show was not really my style. The controlling BF type deal was a bit hard to watch at times. and I KNOW that this entire show is about breaking free of that but the fact that there it is needed in the first place and the lying and secrets.. it was all a bit much for me. However the casting was really good. The chemistry between the characters/actors is awesome and everyone played their role really well!

To my star -> NOW BEFORE YOU BEHEAD ME, HEAR ME OUT. I love this show. I actually love this show. It is really good. But there are some small things that made me frustrated sometimes. Talking about feelings is hard and I do get that 110% but it sometimes felt quite frustrating and left me with a little bit of a bad feeling. I really hope that this show teaches people that you can only really move forward by talking about your feelings instead of running away from them.

Together with me -> The controlling, dramatic, witch female role. Now again, hear me out. The show is great! The chemistry is there, the acting is 10/10 the casting is 10/10 but it has an element I would like to discuss that I have seen in multiple BLs as well. Now I get that the girl is mad, right. Her BF literally cheats on her (shame on u) but the entire master plan the girls come up with like... damn girls... That's all I really have to say about it. Not all women become murderous, petty witches.

TharnType -> From homophobic to being almost assaulted into a gay relationship. Again casting 10/10, chemistry 10/10. But I see this storyline quite a bit too in deluded forms. Consent is a BIG issue in this show for me. Then there is the "I am only okay with this gay guy" idea too that just kinda made me pull some faces at my screen at times.

If you have made it this far... I'm so sorry?

As for now, I think I have written enough about my BL journey so far, if you DID actually read this far and have any questions about it, feel free to ask. I am willing to discuss anything and everything as long as we respect each others views (:

This post is also an invitation to whoever wants to connect. I really do love making friends and my DMs (here and on twitter or if you want to connect on a different platform let me know) are always open. You can literally go in there without context and go: GIIIIRL LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT... and I will reply as if we've been besties for years I really do not mind skipping the awkward first stages of interaction.

My DMs (+replies) are also open for:

Show recs (dm me your fav show and a little description on why it's your fav show and why I should love it too!)

Questions regarding this post or me personally

FanFic recs (If you have written something pls show it to me I love to read!

Seeing my watched list, currently watching list or to watch list for the curious cats (: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ Thank you so much for reading and for now I cannot wait to see what the BL community has in store for me ♥

[nettlestingsoup]

Hi!

I hear someone mention anything craft related and I am instantly summoned AND interested. Needle felting is so cool!!! Please don’t feel shy to share any pics or talk about what you’ve made if you want hehhe. Also how’s the embroidery going?

God there are so many different ways to make things and I want to try every single one.

Also Nettle!!!! The writing progress!!!! Hellooo!!! This is exciting!!! But please take all the time you need! Don’t worry about it.

I saw you mention that you’ve been a bit stressed and it’s none of my business so I won’t ask but I hope you feel better soon! Take good care of yourself! Hopefully you’ve had a nice weekend!!! Do you have anything to look forward to or to help you relax? If I may ask.

hello!!! needle felting is very cool! my parents got me an anatomical set for christmas- a frog and a rat are printed on the fabric and you needle felt their organs in like they're being dissected haha; as a crafty biologist who almost took a taxidermy course a while back, it was the perfect gift! i've not tried it yet, but i'm taking a week off work soon so i might bring it with me on holiday. i'll send photos when it's done!

embroidery is good! my local lgbt bookshop/café has started doing arts and crafts nights, so i've been taking my sewing to those to make some friends! i've almost finished embroidering a houseplant for my sister using wire:

but it needs some rearranging, and some little fake pebbles adding to the base to hide that green foam.

writing progress is actually going so well; i finished editing chapter eight on call on friday, and blitzed through chapter nine on saturday; i'm now on the last scene of chapter ten, so only four more chapters to go! may try to do a little bit on holiday, but i'll most likely be too tired from hiking.

i am stressed! and exhausted! and a little bit burned out! but it's ok because i'm handling it and actively trying to give myself nice and healing things! i had a lovely weekend with board games and cheese scones and midsomer murders and i'm feeling a lot better already. i hope you're well too!!! i want to chat properly soon, i've just not had it in me to respond to messages<3

[planet-hannah]

Behind the scenes with iseder

My reflection on the looks and the trends spotted.

I had the honor of getting a inside look of the effort and work that goes into a fashion show during NYFW. iseder is a luxury avant-garde brand founded by Taylor and Sean. The duo’s brand started in 2021 during the pandemic and from that hardship came a vision that can be shared with creatives everywhere. This was their second show which took place in Marsha P. Johnson State Park on September 12th. The beautiful background of the city only highlighted the collections use of muted colors and textured fabrics.

My day began early at 9 getting ready and waiting on a friend (all love she’s just known to run late). When I got to the venue which was around 1 pm I glanced at a white tent with about 15 models and more trickling in for the next hour. As I watched in awe at everyone doing their jobs I saw Taylor and Sean running around working out every detail only stopping to exchange looks of excitement or nervousness. In between doing hair and makeup models and staff lounged on picnic tables for cigarettes and gossip. Mostly complaining about the heat which was brutal but the tent blocked the bright sun and had a fan so everyone wouldn’t melt. Around 3 after staff set up about 200 chairs all in a single file along the runway, the live band began to rehearse. The music lit up the neighborhood which drew spectators to their luxury balconies to gawk at the glitz and glam. One spectator even brought out binoculars. As rehearsals drew to a close around 5ish anticipation for the show to commence grew and people began to run around working out final touches. Everyone had a digital or film camera in hand snapping candids and having mini photoshoots.

The collection is the reimagining of indie sleaze for our generation. The use of plaid and fur brought a sense of nostalgia that reminded me of when I was little flipping though magazines and seeing fur-lined vest and colorful opaque tights. What appeared after the recession was a whimsical and sexy style that emerged to recapture youth lost. The models told a story with their middle American looks of hardship and distraught glares. The mood of the collection seemed like a reflection of what the youth is feeling while headed straight into a recession. The resurgence of indie sleaze is no coincidence because fashion is a cycle.

The use of Stars in the accessories alludes to the meaning of having dreams not yet reached. It’s the only thing making it possible to hold on to the life we have; the possibility that we can live the life we desire and ultimately deserve while working our low paying bullshit jobs.

Minutes before the show I snapped this pic. Our generation loves expressing themselves with makeup the more the better. We put jewels and stickers and temporary tattoos all over our faces and bodies to express to the the world our mood of the day. (This look is one of my favorites) It’s a sports mesh skirt with a husband* beater top with leather star appliqué. The models makeup was done to match the red stars. Her arm bangles are the brands signature wolf logo. I could easily see this on the streets of Brooklyn. It’s a new way of wearing staples which I love because a little originality never hurt anyone. Sports mesh trending for next season?!

Overall the collection was a love letter to all the dreamers of America. The message was clear. There is still beauty in this crumbling society and your dreams can always come true. Indie sleaze is a theme that reminds us grunge can be dreamy, sexy, and fun. The grunge of society can be beautiful too. Colors of navy, yellow and beige can bring a certain brightness to the mundane that many often ignore. The pop of pink was a nod to bright future that waits us. I’m honored that I could have witnessed the whole day in all its chaotic glory.

[fasa-umich]

Justine Coteng, FASA's 2022 - 2023 Secretary

1: deez nuts

Hi slays 😌 I can’t believe I have reached the end of my time as FASA secretary - it feels like it was only yesterday that I stepped into Palmer Boardroom 5 for the first time 😋

me and alyssa being the first two people at the board transition meeting because everyone else was late getting food

Before I get into the details of being a board member, I’ll talk about joining FASA in general. I became a member in the Fall of 2021 when I was a sophomore (for the first time lol). It all began when I attended Festifall and frantically searched for a “Filipino club.” After I snatched up the free goodies at the Snackpass table, I made my way over to the section of the Diag that was lined with cultural orgs. It took me about 5 minutes to squeeze my way through the mass of people, but I eventually saw someone waving the Philippine flag. A lot was going on and I was pretty overwhelmed, so I honestly don’t remember who I saw or spoke to. All I know is that I was excited to find out that there was an actual student org for Filipino students! 

the picture I took after I walked away from the FASA table at Festifall (why did I call it the filipino club bye)

To be honest, I wasn’t super involved during my first semester of FASA. I attended events once every couple of months, but it wasn’t until PCN committees that I actually started committing (get it? because committees 😀) to our organization. For those few months leading up to PCN, I got to see how passionate our members are about our culture. It was seeing that passion that encouraged me to be more involved with FASA - I knew I wanted to be part of a group that genuinely loves its culture and the people within it.

figure 3: the first existing pictures of me and christian at pcn committee meeting <3 

2: wakanda forever

Fast forward a few months, I decided to run for E-board! The two people that I want to give credit for encouraging me are Emily Madlambayan and Amanda Sutherby. Hearing both of you tell me that I’d be a great fit for board played a huge role in my decision to send in an application, so thank you for supporting me :’)

I was pretty nervous to give my speech during elections. Even though I felt like I knew a good amount of people in FASA, I still didn’t really know the other people running for board. It was a bit intimidating to see that a lot of the other candidates had spent a few months together as interns while I was coming in as a silly little non-intern. However, I’m so glad that I didn’t let my nerves deter me from running. I can’t imagine not having my booty gals by my side!

first board pic!

Throughout this last year of being on E-board, there have been a lot of ups and a few downs.

Ups 😄:

Memories

So many fun times! Here are a few favs of mine:

Tinik on the Diag: I didn’t think I would be able to do Tinik, but honestly I kinda slayed

Halo-Halloween: ya’ll remember those two tacos? (hi catrina)

FASAxPASS Tailgate: I just want to thank Celeste for grilling it UP that day 😮‍💨

Fishing & Unionizing: the weeks that I decided to study with FASA friends were the weeks that I got absolutely nothing done… but it was worth it!

All I Ask… Choir Kids edition

me & meedja milly at fasaxpass tailgate <3

Friends: I have gotten so much closer to people that I don’t think I would’ve gotten close to. It’s hard not to form friendships with people you see all the time, but it’s even harder not to bond with people when everyone is so dope!! I am truly so grateful for the friends I’ve made on board - I don’t think I would’ve made it through the trenches without you all :’)

Growth: Being on E-board taught me so many things, both related and unrelated to FASA. It’s obviously super interesting to see the behind-the-scenes of a student organization, but I also appreciate the growth that came out of sticky situations. For instance, I had to be okay with last-minute changes, denied requests, and miscommunications. Although these things were frustrating in the moment, I ended up learning how to handle those types of situations so that I can slay them in the future!

Downs 😔:

Emmanuel: iykyk

Booking practice rooms in East Quad:🧍🏻‍♀

Burnout: Board burnout is so real. When an E-board is made up of people that truly want to provide the best experience for other members, it’s hard not to reach a point of burnout. It really does take a lot of energy to create and plan out events every week or two! Future boardies, please remind yourselves often that you have a whole group of people that are willing to support you if you need anything. You don’t need to take on too much by yourself - and you shouldn’t, as it will only lead to more stress!

how to cure boardie girl burnout = go hub tubbin

3: slay

I feel like this testimonial has been super chaotic whoops so let me wrap it up😎

To the 2023-2024 executive board: 

I am so excited to see what you all do with FASA! You are all capable of so much - I already know that you’re gonna make this another amazing year for everyone in this org. As I talked about before, burnout is real so please take care of yourselves! 

This year is going to go by so much faster than you think. Enjoy every moment you spend with your fellow boardies, even when you aren’t feeling 100% up to it. By the end of the next year, you’re not gonna believe it’s over (I still don’t!). 

To the next secretary:

hi slay <3 We can talk all about the logistics of what it means to be secretary, but the one thing I really want to emphasize is that your role is vital to the success of the rest of board! There were times when I felt like I wasn’t doing enough or I was ~useless~ because I wasn’t responsible for planning any events while my fellow boardies were slaying with all of their creative ideas. However, having a different role from the rest of board does not mean that your position is less important. Give yourself grace and try to remind yourself of the uniqueness of your role and what it brings to the table! 

To the 2022-2023 executive board: 

I’m so thankful to have been on board with each of you. Thank you for all of the laughs and support throughout this last year. Having to transition to the nursing program (yuck) at the same time as becoming part of FASA board was more difficult than I thought it would be, but I managed to get through it because I knew I could turn to any of you if I felt overwhelmed about anything. The time we spent on board together is something that I will always look back fondly on. So much love 🫶🏼

we definitely didn’t forget caitlin at first…

To FASA:

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to explore my culture alongside some of the most genuine, fun, amazing people I know. Being a part of FASA has been one of the best parts of my college experience, and I know that my time as a member will have a lasting impact on me even after I graduate <3

To the person reading this right now:

ur mom

[faegoddessog]

Okay. So I need to do this publicly because I really want to give you detailed feedback. So everything in BOLD UPPERCASE is my addition to this. MY STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS IF YOU WILL.

Daily Meal AND THERE'S THE TITLE I GAVE YOU

HOW PERFECT DOES HE LOOK HERE?

Please let me know if you see anything that needs attention (other than the fucking hot pic of Austin in a backstage setting that perfectly goes with this story that I wrote way before those pics came out.. magic!!) BEST COINCIDENCE EVER THAT THIS PICTURE CAME OUT THIS DAY

OKAY HERE WE GO

She was sitting on the couch in their apartment, back to the door. It was bad Feng Shui, but it was the only place the robust piece of furniture would fit in the narrow New York apartment. They had rented it furnished and would only be here for about 9 months anyway.  SEE YOU WROTE 'ROBUST PIECE OF FURNITURE' AND I THOUGHT 'OH THEY GONNA TEST THE STURDINESS OF THE COUCH' MY MIND WAS READY FOR SMUT IS ALL I'M SAYING.

She loved going with Austin to his film locations when she could. She adored travel and exploration, but she adored Austin exponentially more. He was the most kind person she had ever met. The fact that he was beyond handsome and famous didn't even matter to her. He had amazed her from their first meeting. A meeting after which, he began to pursue her diligently. OH HE'S A CHASER.

They had been in the City for just over two weeks now, under the guise of 'getting settled’. Really, they had come early because Austin had an addiction, theater. He had drug her out to shows nearly every night for the past two weeks before he started work on his new job. It's not like she hated going, she liked theater too. Just… whoa. She was at the point where she couldn't remember which scene belonged to which play. LOVE HOW YOU INCORPORATED HIS LOVE FOR THE THEATRE. OR AS HE ONCE SAID 'MAINLINING THEATRE'

All that would slow down as today was the first table read of the new play Austin was starring in. Austin was so excited to be working on Broadway again. When he left that morning he was like a kid in a candy shop: smiling, nervous and buzzing. I CAN IMAGINE THAT VIVIDLY.

Tonight though, he promised her something different. He was going to take her to his favorite little hole in the wall place, they had live music every night and 'the best cocktails in town'.  

It was weird for him to want to be out so much, usually he was more of a ‘let’s stay in’ kind of guy. She supposed this was what theater did to him. YEP, FEELS A BIT OOC FOR AUS. BUT LET'S ROLL WITH IT.

Right now though, she had her headphones on trying to finish her remote work before he got home. There had been problems all day at the home office, deadlines had gotten moved up and her boss had put a lot of pressure on her to get them done. She had been frantically working all afternoon and felt like she was getting nowhere. Stumbling blocks and obstacles just kept popping up right and left. She felt like the project was slipping through her fingers. DO YOU KNOW ME IRL? WE HAVEN'T TALKED ABOUT THAT TIME IN MY LIFE, RIGHT? SO THIS ALREADY FEELS VERY FAMILIAR.

Austin traipsed down the hallway to their apartment. His day had been so good, the table read went amazing and the meeting after showed a ton of excitement built up about his new show. He was riding a high when he opened the door and saw her sitting on the couch, back to the door. 

He took a minute to look at her toeing off his shoes as per the rental agreement. YOU CAN PUT THAT IN A RENTAL AGREEMENT?  Her hair was up in a bun, the noise canceling headphones that she preferred to earbuds when working cradling her head. The wide neck of her shirt had slipped down, showing off her shoulders. The thin gold necklace that he had given her draped over the back of her neck gave him warm fuzzies.  AWWWW, HE'S A BIT TERITORRAL WHEN IT COMES TO HER. I LIKE THAT.

Damn he loved her. He was so happy that he got to bring his best girl with him on this project and share with her his love for theater. 

The fact that she could do her job anywhere was amazing. He loved when she joined him on location, though she only ever visited the set occasionally during filming. She said it was important that they had their own bits of life, she didn't want him to feel smothered or like she had to check up on him on set. In fact, she could never make him feel that way. In the past two years, she had become his rock, his solid base to cling to as he jumped into projects that scared him, that pushed him. NICE WORK DESCRIBING AN ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP WITH ALL THE UPLIFTING SIDES THAT COME WITH THAT.

He closes the door. She doesn’t turn, clearly sucked in. YEAH, AND WEARING NOISE-CANCELING HEADPHONES ;)

"Well shit!" she exclaims loudly, banging on her keyboard a little too vehemently,  obviously trying to make something work that was not working. BEEN THERE. VERY RELATABLE.

Austin's eyes narrow in concern. She is usually quite collected, but the move and work had been stressful on her. VERY OBSERVANT BF. LOVE THAT.

He slips into the bedroom, then out again unnoticed, pushing something into his jeans pocket. Austin walks up behind her and lightly touches her bare shoulders. She jumps a bit, startled, and looks up. 

"Oh hey babe," she pulls her headphones off her ears, "how did it go?"

"It went well, I think it's gonna be a really good show," he says, "sounds like your day wasn't as great." 

"That's an understatement," she says rubbing the bridge of her nose, "the whole system just went down, again. So frustrating. I feel like I can't get a foothold on this project." AGAIN, BEEN THERE. VERY RELATABLE.

He leans over the couch and closes the laptop, setting it aside. His lips brush her sensitive spot behind her ear. She closes her eyes, raises her hands to wrap around him and leans into his soft attentions. OKAAAYYY, WE GETTIN' SOMEWHERE.

"Feeling out of control are you?" he rumbles in her ear, "I have something that might help." DOM MODE ACTIVATED.

Before she can ask what, he slips his bracelets over her wrists. The ones that mean she doesn't get to make decisions until they come off.  The ones that signify he is in charge. The ones that mean she belongs to him. YESSS...DEFINITELY LIKE THAT.

Two beautiful Italian-made leather cuff bracelets he had made in lieu of a collar. She did not like things tight around her neck, they had discovered. AGAIN, DO YOU KNOW ME?

The cuffs could dangle comfortably loose, or they could be tightened with small decorative looking buckles if he needed them tighter. They had beautiful intertwining loops of leather with a couple rings of metal that Austin could slip his fingers into to control her or restrain her. Or he could clip them together with a carabiner. He was quite proud of his little invention, really.  DO YOU HAVE VISUALS FOR THOSE?´OR AN AFFILIATE LINK? LOL She can stop it all with the murmur of their safe word, of course. But she was loath to use it unless completely necessary.  CONSENT & RULES IN PLACE...SO IMPORTANT.

She sighs as he slips them on,  pussy clenching, almost Pavlovian in response at this point.  God she loves him, he always knows exactly what she needs. Right now, she needs to not be in charge for a while. He must have had a really good day. He only got them out  when he was in a really good mood.  HIM TAKING CHARGE IS HOT. HIM TAKING CHARGE WHEN HE KNOWS SHE NEEDS IT IS EVEN BETTER: HE DOESN'T NEED TO BE PROMPTED, HE PICKS UP ON IT? TOTAL TURN ON.

"You know I wanted to take you out tonight, Doll," his hands slide down the front of her shirt, teasing her nipples, "but you aren't dressed yet. Oh hunny, what are we gonna do about that?" 

"Out? Aren't we staying in?" she frowned a little, shaking her wrists a little. She had never worn the cuffs out in public before.

"Oh no, we are going, and those are going to stay on. It's New York, after all. No one will think twice," he says, stepping to the chair opposite the couch. I'VE NEVER BEEN TO NY BUT WEARING LEATHER CUFFS (THAT ARE SO NON-OBVIOUS) WOULD FLY UNDER THE RADAR HERE IN MY MID-SIZE EUROPEAN TOWN. SO I IMAGINE IT'S A NO-BRAINER IN NY.

"Yes, Austin," she says looking up at him, grateful to not have to make the decision. LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK: SOMETIMES IT'S A RELIEF TO NOT BE IN CHARGE, TO BE THE PLANNER. I HAVE A FEELING A LOT OF WOMEN FALL INTO THAT CATEGORY.

God he is beautiful. His tall frame is both lean and muscular, she knew he was stronger than he looked. Whether he had a little bit of scruff or he was clean shaven, his face was the very definition of handsome. He had a strong jaw, high cheekbones and the most adorable little corner mouth dimple on his left side. He was dotted with a unique constellation of freckles that she had been known to trace with her fingertips over his cheek and with her tongue as they dipped down his neck and onto his chest. OH THAT'S A CORE FANTASY OF MINE. AGAIN, WE DIDN'T TALK ABOUT THIS. WHAT IS THIS SORCERY? His lips, oh lord, his lips were always soft and kissable. The sharp bow of his upper lip in opposition with the full roundness of the bottom one. He could do things with that mouth, things the mere thought of which had her wet. CHECK. His newly darkened hair accentuated his piercing blue eyes. His new character was raven haired and he was nothing if not thorough in his preparation. His dedication to his craft was something she adored about him. YEP. TOTALLY WITH HER ON THAT ONE.

"Now, you are going to peel down right here,” he places himself deliberately in the chair,  leaning back, long legs crossed, "then you will wear what I pick out." 

His thumb and long fore-finger outline his mouth, pulling his bottom lip out. Something he did when he was nervous or when he was looking at something that turned him on. Right now that something was her. He waved his other hand in a 'well get on with it' gesture.  

"Yes Austin," she said, standing up, "what first?" 

"Hmm, top," he said simply. 

They had played this game before. She knew he liked her to undress slowly and to touch herself when she did it. Her hand started at her waist, fingertips dragging the bottom edge of her shirt up, exposing the natural roundness of her belly. 

She was no impossibly thin supermodel, she was curvy, strong, healthy. He liked that about her, liked that she didn't conform to the California/Fashion/Hollywood standards he had grown up with. She marched to the beat of her own drum. She was hot as fuck doing it. He had noticed that since she was thrust into the public eye by dating him, she was starting to lead the pack in promoting body positivity, just by being herself. QUEEN!!! YES TO NORMAL BODIES AND HOT MEN THINKING NORMAL SIZED WOMEN ARE HOT AF.

The hem of her shirt got caught momentarily on her naturally large breasts as she slowly stripped off her top. She hated wearing bras when at home. THIS! Her breasts bounced just a little as the shirt broke free. It was tantalizing to him. 

"Turn around," he said, "pull those bottoms down, both of them."

Her thumbs hooked onto the waistband of her joggers and panties. Pulling first one side down over her luscious hips, then the other to just under her ass. 

"Stop," he said quickly," mmm, pull those cheeks apart for me." SCREAMING! THINKING ABOUT A CERTAIN BLUE STONED GEM FROM A PREVIOUS STORY.

She grasped the roundness of her ass. The spreading sparking little sensations to her asshole and consequently to her pussy. She breathes out the tiniest of moans. She loves when he orders her to touch herself. 

"Down to your ankles now," he says. 

She steps back from the couch, more in the middle of the space and, bending at the waist, pushes her panties and joggers to the floor.

"Yes, show me that pussy, Doll," his deep voice starting to sound husky.

She steps her feet out of her clothes and then apart, pushing her hips back to him. Reaching back, she pulls her ass cheeks apart. 

"Oh my, baby, you look like you are wet, touch yourself and check," he directs. He has uncrossed his legs, manspreading in the most delicious way, giving himself room to grow. 

LIKE THAT? BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M THINKING ABOUT.

Reaching between her legs with one hand, she dips a finger into her seeping wetness, pulling away a string of moisture. 

"Oh yes you are," he breaths, "do you like being all bent over in front of me, Doll? Showing me that wet, needy pussy?" The sound of a zipper reaches her ears. 

"Yes Austin," her only reply. 

Austin's hands are on her hips, guiding her to his now fully erect, fully exposed lap. "Sit that pretty pussy down on my big cock." 

It was big; long fingers and hands do not lie, at least when it came to Austin. I SHARE THAT LINE OF THINKING.

She nestles down onto him with a pleasure filled moan. The first taste of his cock in her pussy was always perfection for them both, and it only got better from there.

"Oh yes, baby doll, , such a good girl, so wet for me” he praises her, “clean that finger off sweetheart," he pushes her hand to her mouth. 

She turns her head to the side so he can watch her lick her juices. She moans around her finger as he slowly slides in and out of her. 

"Hands," his gruff voice says. 

She knows what he wants. She wants it too. She presents her wrists behind her. He laces the two fingers of one hand into the straps on both wrists. Pulling them tight behind her.

"Make me cum in that pussy baby, ride me," he leans back. 

Clenching his ass and pushing himself further upward, he gives her his whole shaft to ride. His thumb strokes the soft skin of her inner wrist. 

"Yes Austin,” she loves not having to think about what to do next. AGAIN, YESSS. Getting her feet under her, she slowly rises and falls, savoring every centimeter of him.  The stress of the day forgotten as warmth percolates in her lower belly. 

"Fuck yes, god I love your wet cunt wrapped around my dick," he groans out. "Does it feel good doll?"

"Yes Austin," she moans through clenched teeth. Her hips gyrate in slow, wide circles as she slides him further into her. His head brushes past the singular delicious point on the front of her vagina. 

“Ohmigod!” falls from her lips as a shudder runs through her.  

"Don't you cum unless I say so," he struggles not to fuck her back, to let her do all the work. LOVE THAT KIND OF DOMINANCE.

"Oh fuck, yes Austin," she moans. 

She had almost forgotten that part, it had been too long since he had taken the weight of the world from her shoulders. OH THIS HIT'S SO CLOSE. AS AN OVERTHINKER IT RARELY HAPPENS BUT WHEN IT DOES IT'S THE BEST.

As she settles into a slow rhythm, Austin’s free hand slips around her ribcage, his long fingers pressing just under her breast. He steers her towards the pace he wants. 

“Yes baby doll, just like that,” his voice sonorous and deep. YEAH, NOT SO KEEN ON THE TERM OF ENDEARMENT. (BUT HEY, IT CAN'T ALL BE GOOD, RIGHT?)

The exquisite ache starts to pour down his cock and coalesce deep in his groin. He takes a second to watch this gorgeous creature impaling herself on him. The muscles of her triceps popping  as he holds her arms. He can just see the sides of her tits, pressed out and bouncing.  He makes a mental note to have  a mirror to hang on the wall opposite so he can watch her fully. The idea makes his pelvic floor clench and his arousal heighten. THE CLENCHING IS REAL.

“Oh god, oh fuck!” she cries out, his cock bouncing just a little inside her. It’s a small movement but it pings the nerves just right. It forces her muscles to contract deliciously around him, compelling her right up to her edge. The edge, she knew, that was not allowed to her, not yet. EVIL, BUT GOOD.

His chuckle came from deep in his chest. He knows she is getting close. He knows her cues, he made a study of her when they first got together, and he was nothing if not thorough. ALWAYS THE DELIGENT STUDENT. He fucking loves making her cum. 

Her clamping down on his cock makes him gasp.  Austin can’t help himself now, his glutes flexing and thighs straining, thrusting into her. The course of their movement falls naturally into him holding her still so he can fuck her.  He loves fucking her. The anticipation builds in him, the glorious pressure seeps into his lower stomach.

Her head is thrown back, her legs are shaking. His thrusts are perfection, pumping in and out of her, hitting her inside in a way that she just can’t emulate.   She loves it when he fucks her. Warmth rises to heat, swelling inside her seeking a crack from which to release. 

“Please, can I come, please,” she whines, toes curling, muscles tense trying to control the  pleasure wanting to burst out of her.  Wetness trickles down the base of his shaft and onto his balls, 

“NO!” his rasping reply through gritted teeth. He fucks her.

Her eyebrows draw together in a grimace, but the corner of her lips curl into a smile. Yeah, she loves this. This teetering on the edge, praying he will let her drench his cock. HOW DOES SHE HOLD BACK? SUPERHUMAN QUEEN!

And he fucks her. 

“Ungh,” he groans out, “Fuck. Yes!” 

Even through the haze of pleasure she is attempting to override, she can tell when he is close. She knows every sound he makes, the groan in his throat when he is so turned on there is no stopping him. She knows the cadence of his thrusts, when his balls cling tightly to his body in preparation. She fucking loves making him so hot that he can’t help but chase his orgasm single mindedly. 

And he fucks her.

“Can I cum, can I cum, can I cum,” she starts to beg, moaning over and over. 

He knows she is practically cumming already. 

But he can’t answer. 

His thrusts start to stutter, he can feel the pressure building in his balls to the point of no return. Guttural animal noises are all that he can make as the release overtakes him, his body tense. His energy focused on the single point of pulsing and surging of his cum into her frantic pussy.

Finally, he manages to sputter out “Yes.” 

Her orgasm rockets from her as she fucks herself hard on his cock. Clenching him. Drenching him. 

“YES!  YES!  YES!” she is screaming. Spine writhing like a snake.

“Oh my fucking god!” Austin’s eyes roll back, he head lolling on the back of the chair, his now sensitive cock getting a pounding of its own. KHDFKGHÖOIZF(WE&R%/W$EROFNSXFKUZG§$)(%/§$)%$/&POQ§UE=)" I QUITE LIKE THIS!

Finally she stills. Both of them shaking, twitching. He lets go of her wrists. She turns with ragged breath to curl up in his waiting arms. AFTERCARE KING.

>>>><<<<

Austin held her hand, forefinger looped through the bracelet on her hand. They had somehow managed to avoid most paparazzi, though by now they just always assumed there would be photos of them. 

 They walked down the alleyway, towards the blue neon feline over a paint-splattered black door with a stenciled white outline of a cat. It looked grungy and unkept. She looked at Austin as though he was crazy. He just smiled at her, pulled at the door handle without a scrap of hesitation. LOVE THE VIBE

She was wearing the outfit he picked out for her. A dark brown wraparound cocktail dress with capped sleeves and plunging neckline. The curved hemline of the wrap meeting in the front, forming an inverted V. Her legs flashed as she walked. He picked it because he could have easy and full access to her bare pussy. Of course he wouldn’t let her have panties.   She wore leather heeled sandals with straps that criss-crossed and matched the cuffs dangling from her wrists. MATCHING YOUR KINK WITH YOUR OUTFIT IS NEXT LEVEL.

The second they walk down the stairs and into the speakeasy, she knows why he loves it here. It’s like they were instantly transported backstage. Props and set pieces make up the decor, it’s dark and intimate. There is exposed brick and  ductwork and even a steel support beam bolted to its  concrete footing.  She half expects to see a rack of costumes roll by and actors with overly emphasized rouged cheeks hurrying to make their entrance, stage left. 

There is a stage in fact, a tiny one. OH OH, ARE THERE NUDE DANCERS ON THE STAGE? There is a band playing and the place is pleasantly filled with patrons. OH, JUST MUSICIANS. THAT'S WHAT I CALL A MISSED CHANCE.

The bartender greets him like an old friend. They exchange a few sentences and he introduces her. Austin never lets go of her hand. Almost as if she is an anchor for his introverted self in the metaphorical sea of people. STILL THAT INTROVERT AT HEART:

They are shown to the most dark secluded round table with round couch seating in the back corner next to an egress that says ‘STAGE’ in grungy, scuffed lettering. He motions for her to take a seat.

“Peel that skirt slit back as you sit,” he whispers as he strips off his elegant black jacket revealing his basic white t-shirt underneath and the stitching detail on his black trousers. As he sits, he lays the jacket partially over her lap as though she was cold. It’s just a little extra insurance, the table hides most of her lap. 

He snuggles her in tight to him, his long legs crossed towards her. Her hand rests lightly on his thigh One arm languidly around her shoulders, the other resting high on her now bare thigh under his jacket.  He looks her up and down while they sit and enjoy the music for a minute, his fingers making little circles on her inner thigh. 

“You know Doll,” he leans in, lips close to her ear, “you look good enough to eat, I might just make you my daily meal.” THERE'S THAT SONG BIT THAT INSPIRED IT ALL!

Her arm curls her hand to play in his dark hair. The moment is  so intimate. She looks demurely down, pressing her lips together as his fingers graze her other ones under the table. 

The waitress walks over. They both smile up at her like he doesn't have his hand up her dress. 

“Hi, what can I get you two lovebirds,” she says, “Oh wow, I love your bracelet. Where did you get it.” 

“He had them specially made for me,” she grins at Austin. He just nods, not offering any more information. 

The waitress doesn’t note the plural. Austin orders  a lemon sour and the grilled maitake for her and decides on the fried quail and a green toki highball for himself. HOW CAN THEY EVEN THINK ABOUT REAL FOOD?

When the drinks are delivered, Austin removes his hand from her thigh and then replaces it with the one draped over her shoulders. 

“Wider,” he says smiling while handing her the lemon sour. Her legs part just enough so his hand can slip between them. As he sips, he pulses two fingers against her labia in time to the music.  STRUMMING HER LIKE A GUITAR...

She  watches the  little stage, trying not to show her arousal on her face as she drinks. His pulsing becomes pushing as her wetness creeps onto his digits. Slowly sinking his long dextrous fingers over her clit and to the second knuckle inside her warm wet pussy over and over. It’s getting harder for her to keep her composure. 

Food arrives. He retracts his fingers, wiping them cursorily between her thighs. She notes that they still glisten as he pulls a piece of quail off with his hands. Looking her in the eyes, he licks his fingers off before putting the bite in his mouth. DIRTY MAN. LOVE IT.

She knows what that beautiful tongue can do and hopefully will do later, if she’s good.

When they are done with their meal, she excuses herself to the bathroom, slickness lubricating her inner thighs.   She makes her way through the rabbit warren that is the underground of this building to find the restroom. She tries her best to wipe away her arousal, not that she is embarrassed, she loves being this wet for Austin. It’s just that she came dangerously close to leaving a wet spot  on the back of her dress. GIRL HAS STILL TOO MUCH GOING ON IN HER MIND? IF IT'S DARK NO ONE WILL SEEEEEEEEE.....

When she steps out, hair, pussy and makeup refreshed, Austin is there, coat over his arm,  in the tight hallway. He smiles and takes her by the hand, fingers looping into the leather at her wrist. He leads her, she is sure, in the wrong direction, away from the speakeasy. 

“Austin, I think it’s that way,” she says, pointing over her shoulder, forgetting the rules of their game. 

He stops near a door and looks at her with one eyebrow cocked. “Are you questioning me?” I SEE TROUBLE ON THE HORIZON.

“I just don’t want them to think we aren’t paying… or … some…thing.” she says, her words falling off.

“Hmm,” is all he says. OH OH. DEFENETLY IN TROUBLE.

He pushes the door open staring at her, then nods his head toward the dark entrance.   He had been here before, and was hoping not much had changed. 

The door led into another darkened narrow hallway, then opened onto the backstage wing of this old theater.  There was a concrete ledge and exposed brick, even some graffiti. The leg curtains still hang, dusty, masking this little used space. THAT'S AN INSURANCE LIABILITY IF I EVER SEEN ONE.

The stage itself and the old seating area are clearly in the process of some kind of remodeling job. The lights are still on, blazing. Someone may still be at work here at this late hour. 

Austin walks a little, checking out the stage. She can tell the place is speaking to his theater blood. He places his jacket on the stone ledge.  He strides two steps toward her and leans against the stone to brick wall. With narrowed eyes, he looks her up and down. 

"Damn baby doll," the fingers of his right hand, glide across his bottom lip and chin as if trying to decide what to do with her, “about that daily meal.”

He reaches for her, pulling her against him. He flips her hair over her shoulder with the back of his hand, sliding it behind her neck and up to the back of her head. He presses her back to the wall. 

"Spread your legs baby doll," his lips brush her ears as he grasps her hair in a loose fist. 

The sensation on her head makes her shudder, the growl of his voice sends deep vibrations to her core. She steps her feet gingerly apart.  SHIT. EVEN I FEEL THOSE VIBRATIONS...

"Lift your skirt, like a good girl," he kisses her cheek sweetly. 

Her fingers gather the front of her skirt into her palms. The cool air of the space feels good on her hot cunt. 

"Mmm, such a pretty pussy," he croons in her ear. Austin's long fingers brush the length of her outer lips.

"This is pretty dry baby,  do you not like our little game anymore?" he asks with almost a pout, patting her mons, "do you want me to stop?" He lets his hand drop to his side. AUS THAT'S YOUR PART IN THIS EQUATION.

"No, no, I love it," she says quickly. She grabs his hand and pulls it back to her, “please don't stop." She was too far into the scene now, he had built her up too much all night to just stop. She needed him, needed whatever he decided to give her tonight. 

"Tch, tch, tch,” his tongue clicks on the roof of his mouth, “oh Doll, did I say you could let go of your skirt?" He looks at her reprovingly, one eyebrow lifted, "questioning me, making up your own directions… oh no.” I SEE SOME FPRM OF PUNISHMENT COMING.

Whoops. 

"I'm sorry…Sir," she quickly gathered her skirt up again, bottom lip catching in her teeth. 

"Oh sugar, it's ok, or it will be in a minute," a devilish smile curls his lips.

Slap! His hand met her pussy with a sharp smack. The jolt sent electricity through her. She fucking loved when he slapped her pussy, liked it even when her bracelets weren't on. 

"Say it," his voice was stern as he pets her, his eyes locked onto hers in the dim light. 

"Austin," she breathes.

Slap! Her mouth curves slightly upwards as she jolts, chin tilting up. 

"Is," the word comes out more defiant than she meant. 

The hand in her hair tightens hard and pulls her head back, towering over her, his jawline set.  Moisture springs immediately to the waterline of her eyes. THAT'S NOT WHERE THE LUBRICATION IS NEEDED GIRL. BUT I UNDERSTAND.

SLAP! Harder. Her leg shakes with the pain and pleasure of it. 

"Hnngh, In," more of a moan than a spoken word. 

Austin's lips brush hers. His tongue flickers out to wet her lips, then his own push gently against them. His lips leave, but his eyes remain close to hers. She can see her desire reflected in his eyes. 

SLAP! Hardest. OOOUUUUUFFFFF!!!!

"Charge!" the word squeals from her throat.

"Mmm hmmm, that's right Doll," he croons, staring at her eyes, "now, are you gonna be good and do as I say?”"

She would nod if she could, but his grip on her hair was just tight enough to restrict her movement.

“Yes Sir,” she breathes out. 

“That’s my girl,” he releases her hair and kisses her softly, lovingly, his hand rubbing soothingly on her tingly,  dry lips. STILL DRY? GIRL YOU NEED TO DRINK MORE WATER.

“Hmm, maybe this little pussy  just needs some encouragement?” he rubs a deep circle over her mons. Zings of pleasure tighten in her. 

“Oh fuck,” slips from her mouth.

“Oh my, what a dirty mouth you have, Doll. Do I need to give it something else to do?” he asks, stepping back from her, fingers tapping the clasp at his waist. 

She stands there, looking down at his tapping hand, breath shallow. She is still holding her dress up, still exposed to him, for him. Gods she is beautiful, he was so smitten with her.  

She is trying so hard to be good.  All she really wants is to leap on him, make him fuck her until she fills the thearter with the cacophony of her screaming orgasm. It was easier to cum when she was loud. 

“Hmm?” he waits. 

Slowly, she raises her eyes to his, chin still pointed down, a little hungry smile on her lips. She just nods. She loves his cock in her mouth. 

His eyebrow twitches and a little moan sounds deep in his throat. If he wasn’t fully hard before, the look on her face made him so now. He pulls open the clasp quicker than he meant to. GOOD HE'S AFFECTED TOO.

Fuck she made him want her so badly. He thought about just sinking his cock into her. Fucking her until she begged him to stop, then doing it a little longer. She would be loud in this cavernous place and probably alert everyone in a half mile radius. 

He took a breath, calming himself just a little.  Not trusting himself to talk just yet, he indicates the floor with his eyes and a little nod of his head.

She slowly gets down on her knees in front of him licking her lips in preparation.

“Open” he commands as he pulls himself out.  

He places his velvety head on her outstretched tongue. 

Her eyes look up at him, she knows he likes that. The tip of her tongue laps up and down on his frenulum, her mouth still wide open. His breath leaves him in a low moan as she gradually drags his cock further and further into her mouth. When his tip hits her soft palette, her lips close engulfing him. Her wet lips dragging along his dry shaft. HE TOO, HAS A DEHYDRATION PROBLEM? ;)

Her hands are still on the hem of her dress, holding it up, exposing herself.  Afterall, he didn’t tell her to let go and she is trying so hard to be good for him.  

He holds himself at the base as she glides her head back and forth over his length. Her tongue rippling along his underside.  He hadn’t planned on fucking her mouth, he hadn’t planned on cumming until they got home. But the thrill of maybe being caught was exhilarating PREACH IT (ALSO ANOTHER REQUEST UNLOCKED) and she was so fucking good at this. He found himself holding her head still and thrusting into her. He tried not to make her gag too much, but when it happened it was so hot. 

She fucking loves this, loves his movement in her mouth, loves it when he gags her just a bit, bringing up that thick spit from the back of her throat. She is surprised when his hands go to her hair to hold her still. She didn’t think he’d go for it here. It’s hot, the way he loses control. YEP. PRETTY FUCKING HOT. She presses her lips over her teeth. Breath is seething through his teeth, she can tell he is close. 

Her tongue feels like some kind of wizardry along the underside of his shaft. Her eyes are closed, and he watches himself sink between her pretty pink lips. 

She is his good girl, his naughty girl. 

His.

“I’m gonna cum, I don’t want to see any of it leave your mouth,” he whispers to her. His head tilts back, as she sucks him long and hard. 

Muttered curses come from him in his last few thrusts. He surges into her mouth, hot and sticky.  She greedily swallows everything he gives her. As he pulls out, her tongue presses up on the bottom of his cock, milking the dregs of his cum onto her tongue. He groans.  She leaves her tongue out to show him. 

“Let me see that dirty mouth. What a good girl you are,” he pants, “Swallow it hunny.” 

She does, licking her lips. Fuck she is hot. BOTH ARE. FFS.

He pulls her up to standing. Wiping his thumb along her wet chin. Then kissing her mouth deeply.  Her hips are rocking back and forth lewdly, hands still holding her dress up. It is clear she is too far gone to just leave. 

He deliberately tucks his spent cock back into his pants. She lets out a little whine. 

“Such a good girl, swallowing all my cum. I think you earned a little reward, don’t you?” his fingers lightly play at the collar of her dress. 

She is practically seething with desire, if she didn’t have the bracelets on, she would have shoved him up against the wall and had her way with him. But all she can do right now is nod. 

“Use your words,” he admonishes, fingers tracing down the curves of her waist. “Tell me what you want.”

“I…” she pants, ”I need...” 

“What do you need, baby doll, tell me…” he urges her on. OH NOT THAT NICKNAME AGAIN!!!!!

“I need… I need to cum.” the last word exhaled out, barely audible. 

“Oh but baby Doll,” his pinky and thumb splayed to either side, he draws a long, slow line up her inner thighs. She shudders as his touch sends electricity up her spine. He stops just short. “You forgot to say please.” 

SLAP! 

Her pussy stings in the most glorious way. 

“Start over,” he says low in her ear. 

SLAP! 

“I need..” she moans SLAP!

“to cum…” she is shaking

SLAP! 

“Please!” her voice a whine.

SLAP! 

“SIR!” The last impact is like stinging rapture. GOOSEBUMPS!

“Shhhh, that’s better, my good girl,” he says quietly in her ear. “I’m gonna make you cum, but you have to be quiet. Understand?”

Her eyes go big for a second, she is terrible at being quiet, but she is shaking with the wanting of him, she won’t make it home in this state. She just nods, biting her lip,  hoping she can. 

He backs her up to the stone ledge, grasping her inner thigh, he lifts her leg so that her foot is on the ledge. She is more exposed than ever, wide open for him. 

“Keep your hands on the ledge,” he whispers in her ear. 

He falls to his knees in front of her. 

“Well that did it baby doll, you are dripping now. You must like me in your mouth, yes?” AH HYDRATION PROBLEM SOLVED....AN EXCHANGE OF FLUIDS IS NEEDED.

“Oh yes sir,” she whispers. 

“Do you like it when I punish this pretty pussy” he asks, looking up at her. 

She just whines and nods, not trusting herself to speak. NODDING ALONG.

“I’m gonna clean this up now, you stay quiet.” 

He licks long strokes up her pussy, strings of moisture sticking to his tongue. With one hand, he spreads her labia wide. He can see her glisten, even in the dim light. Knowing he doesn’t need to gently warm her up, he dives right in. He presses his mouth to her, his nose buried against her mons. The middle of his tongue rolling wide just below her clit. God he loves the taste of her pussy. He could lick her all night. 

The instant his tongue hits her, her supporting leg nearly gives out. Thankfully the ledge is there to hold her up. 

His tongue reaches back, pushing into her as far as he can go. He laps up toward her clit, bringing her juices along.

God he is good at this. She is lost in the motions of his tongue against her. Her lips pressed tight together, trying not to moan. She could let him tongue fuck her into oblivion. 

He traces a circle around her clit. Then two fingers push their way into her wet slit. Her spine curls over him as thrilling tension fills her. He flicks her clit with the tip of his tongue, then rubs with a wide tongue, fucking her slowly with his fingers.  

Her head is tucked forward, body clenched tight, the heat behind her clit collapsing in on itself. 

“Please can I come? Please?” she barely whispers. 

“Mmmhmm,” he nods, looking up at her. Holy shit, his blue eyes against that black hair looking up at her from between her legs? Divine.

Little outpourings of her juices start to soak his hand. He sucks her clit into the vacuum of his mouth, licking, licking, licking. Fingering her faster. 

He can hear a quiet, high pitched nasal whine, her teeth clamping down on the meaty pad of her thumb. Suddenly she is jerking against his mouth, exploding, thrusting her gushing cunt onto his fingers. It’s all he can do to keep contact with her wild gyrations. 

FJBDFGHSIUFHKWLENEFHIÖAEWUZTHKJSbDVJLDFHGIEHGIUADHGTKAERHGTOIAEJRGTPOUEATHTGKJGMGFM!!

Eventually, she slows, as does he. He stands up, adjusting his now once again hardening cock. He puts his arms around her, holding her close as little aftershocks yank at her core. 

“There’s my good baby Doll.” he whispers lovingly in her ear. NOT BABY DOLL AGAIN!

She curls into him, panting quietly. 

Then he hears voices float down from the back of the theater. 

“Yes sir and as you can see we have already started renovations here.. Let me take you down and show you what we plan to do with the stage area.” 

“Very good, how much longer will all this take?”

His eyes go huge. She is still oblivious, coming down off her high. 

“Shh, we have to go,” he whispers to her. He grabs his coat and drags her quietly with his wet hand to the cramped, dark  hallway where they came in.  As they reach the door, they can hear the voices. 

“What are these water drips on the floor?” VERY NECESSARY!!!!

“Oh, um… I don't know we’ll have to check if there are any pipes up there”

“I was told this building was sound…”

Austin opens the door back near the bathrooms of the speakeasy, lips pressed together. Once the door shuts behind them he breaks out in giggles, dragging her away from the door. 

“Holy crap, that was close,” he says. 

“I didn’t see any water on the floor?” she is still slightly befuddled. 

“Oh baby, that was you all over the floor,” he tells her with a knowing smile. HEHE!

Her mouth drops open. She stops and  down at her splattered legs and covers her laughter with her hands. 

“Whoops” she says, still giggling, leaning on the wall. 

“Whoops is right,” he pulls a strand of hair away from her face. Holding her hand, he unbuckles one, then both bracelets from her wrists. They slip into his pockets. 

“I think I’d like to take you home and take my time to make love to you, if you are ok with that.” HOW CAN SHE WALK AFTER ALL OF THIS? OR EVEN SPEAK IN FULL SENTENCES?

“Mmm more than ok,” her smile is huge and warm, “thank you Austin, I really needed that.”

“You are welcome, I’m sorry it’s been so long sweetheart,” his hand comes to her face, “and in case I haven’t said it, I am so thankful you are here with me, enduring the chaos that is sometimes my life. I love you so much.” 

“It’s our life, Austin,” she says with soft eyes, “and I wouldn't have it any other way. I love you too.”  

Their lips press together in a soft, sweet kiss. 

A NOTE PLEASE; FOR THE LOVE OF THY READERS, REMIND THEM TO STAY WELL HYDRATED. WITH ALL THIS HEAT AND CONTINUED LOSS OF FLUIDS, HYDRATION, EVEN AS A READER, IS KEY! A THANK YOU AGAIN, THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST GIFTS I EVER RECEIVED: DEEPLY PERSONAL, FUN AND JUST PERFECT. (Alas those nicknames but you couldn't know that. Hell, I didn't know that those are my pet peeves.) I'LL TREASURE THIS FOREVER.

Oh I'm glad you liked it!!! Love the stream of consciousness feedback!

On nicknames: all nicknames? Baby? Doll? baby doll? (My thought was that once the cuffs go on, she is is Doll, so that's what he calls her, and baby is just a normal Term of Endearment, so... sometimes Baby Doll.) Do you want me to take them out for you?

Yes, you can put 'no shoes inside' in a rental agreement.

The leather cuffs are purely from my imagination, I don't actually know if they are a real thing. I will see if I can draw them up to give you a visual.

You are so welcome, the pleasure was all mine... well... Let's spread the pleasure around... shall we?

[ess-presso]

ess! <3

last night i went stargazing to see that comet that hasnt been visible since 50,000 years ago and it was pretty cool. the moon was out & i saw sirius too so i took a pic of them together #wolfstar5EVERRR

ur so right james would absolutely use duolingo to learn french for reg. that man is WHIPPED hed do anything for him.

tay time! you belong with me, style, & london boy <3

chat chat!

timmy and flo my absolutely beloveds. i think id probably watch anything theyre in (except maybe dont worry darling, even if it feels like a "movie". idk maybe its hilarious.)

tourists piss me off SO much sometimes. especially when theyre taking pictures of random shit like. clouds or trees. girl you dont have clouds or trees where you live???

i think a lot of cats are predisposed to be heinous bitches tbh. i can always count on my cats to be blunt when i need them to be <3

and wait blaise/luna.... i kinda love this too. adding those fics to my tbr, ty <3 i have another fic rec, lessen my load by moonymoment (wolfstar muggle au, remus finds sirius having a breakdown in a laundromat cause he put a red glove in his white wash)

if u do end up trying out the incest chronicles, giving u a fair warning that the first books are like so cringey. they were written in 2007-onwards and u can definitely tell. theyre def not for everybody but the prequel/sequel series are SO good. but godspeed anyways.

ben barnes in podg is SO sirius idk what it is abt him hes great. when people use his scenes in edits with sirius i eat it up every damn time.

handing in ur paper 8 mins before its due? u know what, u deserve a drink for that. drunk procrastinators never miss fr.

and yes im very excited to read that whenever u get around to writing it! no pressure ofc take your time <3

and damn ROYAL butter? okay i understand now. 4 tubs is very fair. and TOBLERONE on god is one of my fav chocolates. second maybe to terrys chocolate oranges imo.

dancing in the kitchen to jazz does sound super peaceful. sometimes moments like that feel like theyre straight out of a cute little movie and it makes life feel a little happier <3

please try poutine. its so good. and ur right jello salad is a crime. feels like a hate crime tbh.

colourful cars will always have my heart fr. leaving a tip after being driven around is a good idea maybe i should start doing that.

ill let u know when ive started the apprentice, im excited to see the hyde guy now. and kim kardashian lady too.

platonic soulmates>>> i think we lucked out with our best friends. lu walking through the rain for ur turnover? i love that sm. ur right L names do have some spice in them.

and yay geoguessr! i was shit at first too. but i got sucked in and like studied license plates and fucking road lines and signs so id be good. it aint much but its honest work. (i graciously thank u for the apple turnover. ur too kind)

i hope i dont have a gay realisation superpower. thats like having anti rizz. everyone whos liked me turning out to be gay? like yes im glad i could help but. as long as my soulmate likes me ig.

i love ur james fc sm. i love that theres so many different james fcs too like hes just everywhere <3 andrew & ben will always be remus & sirius but at the same time, they still dont look quite like how i imagine them to be. i think likeafunerall's art is as close as anything has ever gotten to them so ig theyre just too pretty in my mind for a real human to look even close to them. good for them.

and HUGH! hugh and lil timmy tim are like the only PERFECT fcs in my mind. everyone else has some wiggle room but not evan and reg. theyre just perfect.

ur so lucky to be a gryffindor. how does it feel to live my dream??

orpheus & eurydice </3 "if u must die, let love be the reason why" ARE U TRYING TO KILL ME?????? ill never get over them ever.

tbh i think soldiers are cool af. i saw a tiktok that said sirius would be the soldier (remus = poet, james = king) so thats also cool .

and no way u were listening to work song . i listened to that like 10 mins ago. hozier my beloved <3

athena kids are cool as hell. like go off smartypants! but yes raising the dead sounds cool too. idk what id use that power for cause i definitely dont need an undead army to fight for me so. maybe i can use it to talk to like. julius caesar or something.

tay NEVER MISSES!!!

and yes bowie for LIFE. also knee socks>>>> love that song sm. AM changed my life too. HS1 def altered my brain chemicals too (i got to see him in concert. it changed my life fr)

erudite !!!! <3

and yes its barbaric as fuck. if ive learned anything from studying ancient history its that humans have always been fucked up. so thats always nice.

silver jewellry is so cool . goes so well with my black leather jacket & docs cause im nothing if not channelling sirius black energy into my appearance at all times <3 u loving gold cause its expensive is so real. like yes its bougie as hell. and? also v gryffindor of u. cause its gold. u just need to wear red and ur set.

ur right tay does have that range. still love lana but she just has an overall darker tone which isnt always the vibe. miss taylor never misses.

LISTEN IM SORRY!!!! I LOVE CRUEL SUMMER SM. theyre both completely tied for me but i was just in a dont blame me kinda mood ig.

and yes the great war is very much a cr song. theres a chapter named the great war so its just a lot. so heartbreaking but SO beautiful. but my tears ricochet <3 like u know what taylor, ur right. i DIDNT have it in myself to go with grace.

lilac candles <3 theyre so nice. and yes. it did smell like piss. not sure what i expected tbh. but yeah

slow walkers are the worst and i agree people blocking hallways????? so annoying. especially when they walk slowly in these big groups that span the width of the hall and theyre too busy talking to notice EVERYONE trying to get by. UGHHH

having 2 middle names is so cool i wish i had 2 tbh.

on GOD that hc kills me. every time i watch poa i think of it and i get so sad.

i love winter sm too. personally im an autumn girly but winter is a close second. i love the festiveness sm <3

i loved chemistry too. yes i did drop it for bio cause im shit at math and bio has less numbers but idc it was still fun. and we do NOT talk about physics i hate that subject with my whole heart.

id pick hogwarts too honestly. i just wanna be magic u know.

and a coin collector thats so cool. i love unique coins sm. we had some here in canada a while ago that had the northern lights on them and GLOWED IN THE DARK (pic here)!! they were so cool i think i still have a few.

cardigan has my heart. but i think if i had to pick id choose mirrorball BUT only because i personally relate to it more. cardigan will forever be more heartbreaking and ofc, i cant listen to it without thinking abt wolfstar so.

a fellow erudite! we're superior for sure i just know it.

unicorn is such a good choice. theyre so cool and being able to grant wishes would be so fun. i think id choose a phoenix cause theyre fiery and cant die. also cause i change my appearance all the time so in a way its like a phoenix rising from the ashes all funky and brand new.

the vibes in the 50s was so cool i agree (minus the racism sexism and homophobia fuck that shit!!!!) . all i want in life is to go to a cute little 50s diner and drink milkshakes and listen to 50s music. i would love to go to ancient rome or greece but purely for the vibes and aesthetic tbh. id hate to go there cause im a woman and women werent generally considered people in the greek world </3 especially ancient athens, women were discouraged from leaving the house & if they did they had to cover their entire body head to toe. (to preserve their dignity and whatnot). i personally like a little more freedom than that so, no thanks <3

ur ideal first date>>>> literally perfect ideas. ESPECIALLY the bookstore i just love the idea of a cute lil bookstore date. & of course just walking and talking i feel like is so necessary to get to know someone yk?

being rejected from netball and taking it as a personal attack i feel u so hard. id be pissed if that happened to me.

and game night! monopoly game night sounds so fun. i actually cant play monopoly anymore cause i get so competitive and it makes me mad and it pisses everyone off LOL so ive been banned. i do love me some chess though.

art <3 omg have fun on saturday that sounds awesome. the closest art gallery to me is pretty lame most of the time which sucks cause i only get to see cool art when i travel which isnt a whole lot lmfao. cafe terrace at night is such a gorgeous work of art. i love van gogh sm. my mom is actually a painter and van gogh is her fav artist so she paints van gogh recreations its pretty cool.

answering qs!~

ideal first date: either art gallery or museum. there is nothing in this world i love more than art and history and humanity so being able to see it with someone i like & being able to infodump random fun facts about history would be the dream. ofc we have to stop at a bookstore (ideally we pick out books for each other cause i love that idea its so cute) and stargazing. i love the stories behind the constellations so its always fun to talk abt them.

rep vs lover: i think lover. its just so good and the vibes are astronomical. dont get me wrong i adore rep too but i think rep is better for when im feeling vengeful <3

hozier vs am: god this is so hard but i think im gonna have to say hozier. hes just such an incredible songwriter and his music i swear i can feel it in my BONES its so visceral. his lyrics rip me apart too theyre just so good.

i dont play sports. in general i hate sports and physical activity (except i do on occasion fuck up a game of badminton) i used to be a dancer and gymnast but that was a long time ago. i did a bit of volleyball when i was like. 11? 12? but i hated it.

fav board game: prob settlers of catan! idk what it is about it but i love that game. i love chess too but i get too competitive sometimes so.

take me to church vs work song: work song. "no grave can hold my body down, ill crawl home to her" ARE U KIDDING???? such a perfect song. i love tmtc so very much too. "i was born sick" hits different when ur a closeted little kid whos figuring life out

fav season: autumn forever. i just love the vibes and the temperature is usually perfect, not too hot not too cold. cozying up with a sweater and tea and a book is all i need. ofc winter is a close second cause christmastime.

fav food: probably pasta. my dad is from italy so i eat a lot of pasta. bolognese, chicken cacciatore, & penne alla vodka are personal favourites & my comfort foods.

fav marauder hc: i have a few random ones i love, like that james sings really loudly in the shower, that sirius was left handed (bc im left handed and i say so), also that regulus would be a black cat if he was an animagus. hes just got sm little black cat energy i love him. also lily being a night owl & james being an early bird, lily getting annoyed cause james is TOO happy in the early morning and shes just done w him.

one ship i hate: i HATED dorcas/peter in atyd. i know it was written way before dorlene got really popular but it was still such a jumpscare to read. also i know a lot of people seem to like them but regulus/remus?? personally no thanks. i can see why theyd be cute but sirius is the ONLY one for remus imo. i much prefer regulus and remus to be besties and talk shit ab sirius together cause they love him <3

patronus: ive done the test a few times and ive gotten rattlesnake, grey owl, & raven. personally i wouldve loved a cat but sadly no

favourite piece of art: ive got a few actually ( i love art sm.) loch lomond by gustave dore, wheat field with cypresses by van gogh, and hygieia by gustav klimt❤️

ginny or luna: luna. i love ginny SM but luna was my fav character as a kid so she has my heart. i also have her wand so its only fair i pick her <3

favourite restaurant: probably this one thats out in the city, theyve got the BEST gyoza ive ever had in my life. and they make good martinis so. but you cant go wrong with mcdonalds late at night when u need something greasy. also dairy queen (do u have those in the uk? i feel like theyre just in north america) has some good ass ice cream sundaes.

fav beverage: i love coffee, iced coffee to be specific. root beer and cream soda too. red sangrias and espresso martinis are top tier too.

qs for u!

whats one song ur convinced was written abt u?

patronus?

if u could only listen to 1 song for the rest of ur life, which song would u pick?

if u could have a superpower, which one would u want?

messy or organized?

favourite candy/chocolate/sweet?

if u could meet one dead historical figure, who would u choose?

take me to church vs work song.

whats your go-to hype songs when ur getting ready/going out?

fav type of weather?

fav thing youve ever dressed up as for halloween?

thats all for now! till next time <3

-bee

bee hi ! I thought you'd abandoned me , and I'm so glad you're back , I missed you !!!

OH MY GOD ??? you were star/comet gazing ??? that's so cool and so sirius of u !!! (also yes , take the photo , even the universe ships them, wolfstar 5ever.)

YES !!!! get u a man who learns French like James Potter would for regulus black !!! he is amazing , stellar , the one , the only , there is no one like him.

tay tay time !!! -

you belong with me - JEGULUS - I can see it as wolf star too , but I'll give it to regulus. like an au where reg and sirius and James were all best friends , and reg had a little crush on mr James the jock , but him having a gf , and regulus being all 'you belong with me' THEM

style- JILY- this could go for literally so many ships. like wolfstar , jily, anything. I chose jily , simply because i feel that just like the hook , james and lily never go out of style. and also lily would ask him about reg , and he would tell her the whole truth & nothing but the truth. in a muggle au i totally see them as on and off and on and off until they’re finally on again and this time it sticks forever.

london boy - WOLFSTAR - listen , I know remus is welsh (or half , at least) so I think of him meeting sirius in an au in some au , and being all 'DIMPLE' 'ACCENT' 'GOD I LOVE THE ENGLISH' (au/oneshot idea??) 'in the pub watching rugby with his school friends ??? yes yes yes , them them them !!! so them , I could cry !!!

chatting time <333

I too would watch anything and everything. save dwd , its reviews are terrible and I cba to check for myself.

'girl you don't have clouds or trees where you live ?' HOWLING THIS IS SO FUNNY. and true , honestly. what's so English and special about our clouds and trees?? if u show someone back home will they go 'ahh yess , this is an English cloud , native to the England !'

cats just tell it like it is. it's just the truth. cats for the win , I love cats u love cats we all do. we are humans and they're gods.

ik ik blaise/luna is a funny little side pairing and I love them they're actually so cute!!! (the fics are dhr and drarry so do take care of that !! but they're there. I love the little hints.)

LESSON MY LOAD OH MY GOD !!!! ON MY LIST , DOWNLOADED. (I love the sound of it. very interesting. I would also cry because of a red sock. I WOULD SUE. SUE.)

cringey series. hmm. I think I'll take a crack. I've braved through wattpad , I can brave through this too. I am a soldier after all.

IT'S THE SMILE I'M TELLING YOU IT'S THE SMILE. SOMETHING ABOUT HIM ,,, IT'S JUST SIRIUS.

drunk procrastinators forever !! (me because I have an exam in 45 minutes and I'm writing this rn instead of doing last minute revision ! but at least Lu's coming to pick me up !!!!! drivers r so good for ur health.)

I'm excited to write it. but I must get ahead with my writing of doa and sito. I'M SO EXCITED. it shall hurt ! it is fake/secret dating ! it is the bet trope !

IT'S ROYAL BUTTER INDEED. I have no idea why I felt the need to do that. but we shall march on and ignore the royal butter in the fridge.terry's chocolate oranges stay winning though >>> (did u see that video of the American/australian BITING into one ?? I almost cried like what the fuck u bitch u should be banned from Europe for this crime) TOBLERONE. MY DRUNK ARSE WANTED TOBLERONE. so does my sober arse though. so fair. fair. I see u drunk me. I see u.

it's so peaceful. straight out of the movie . (especially because it was raining too) and he was laughing whenever I stepped on him , and it was so sweet and ahhhhh !! try it , 'tis a remedy for all the types of pain ever !!! get u a best friend (liz would do it maybe ?) and dance. just dance , quite literally !!!!

jello salad is a hate crime. war crime. whoever created it should go to hell. with the salad. (I WILL BE TRYING POUTINE. IT SOUNDS SO GOOD OMG.)

colourful cars >>>> (remember to only do one cent. after all , they should be happy to have you in their car. really , you're doing them the favour.)

yes!!! lmk !!! I must know your opinions on them !!!

I keep getting like 3.2 km away from the actual answer and it's so annoying. like I'm sorry I guessed Ithaca and not buttfuck , usa.

WE DID LUCK OUT WE DID. they're actually the best people ever. no one will ever be better than them.(though , they lucked out too.) L NAMES 5EVER. LU AND LIZ 5EVER ACTUALLY !!!!!

LMFAO NOT THE ANTI-RIZZ.ur soulmate will like u !! I know they will !! and u have liz for now !! let's vibe and be drunk with our L best friends !! romantic love will come in its own time :))))) (also for me when I liked Victoria , it was me being like 'is she gay/queer/likes women ??? and then it was like - she did. but I found that out because she had a girlfriend. and she's kind of a bitch now that I don't like her. I hope she fails her exams , damn.)

omg likeafuneralls art is fucking magical !! I worship the art so much. I was actually thinking of printing them out and sticking them up on my wall !!!! and yes , so many James fcs !!! (my James is my personal favourite , but I'm biased) I adore all of them !!! (and omg I so get not having an fc too !! they're just ethereal .... no human will ever be good enough for them.)

HUGH AND TIMMY TIM TIM >>>>>>>>>> (I love them sm sm they r my heart. did u see the Apple TV ad where Timmy sees Gary Oldman ?? look it up you'll get what I mean.)

DUDE ME NEITHER. WE CAN BE SAD OVER THEM TOGETHER !!!!!! ( I was secretly trying to kill you, u figured out my plan !!!)

DID YOU SEE LIKEAFUNERALL’S ART OF THIS EXACT SITUATION?????? IT’S SO GOOD (she has soldier sirius , poet remus & king james)

WORK SONG MAKES ME CRY A LOT. "no grave can hold my body down , I'll crawl home to her" has been engraved into my brain. ENGRAVED I TELL U.

if u talk to caesar ask him how he felt before he died. was it like a Jesus style betrayal??? like did he at least get a little kiss before ??

tay I love tay tay changed my LIFE.

BOWIE BOWIE (STARMAN STARTS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND) knee sock was so funny because when it started playing yesterday , I was wearing my knee socks under my t-shirt dress , and lu was wearing his sky blue Lacoste ??? like Alex turner was watching us fr fr.

here's my concert story - my best friend went to the 1975 concert. and he went , and he came back , and he said 'Matty had a special guest on tonight' and I was like 'who' and then he whipped out a tissue and gave it to me and was like 'Taylor' I SOBBED. SOBBED. (also will harry ever stop touring??? is he not tired??? and also I'm pretty mad at him for the 'never leave America' thing. bitch forgot where he came from.)

eruditessssss!!!

at least we're a different kind of fucked up now though ! that's good !

u r so very sirius. I dress in red and gold a lot , actually?? but I have a lot of colours. rn I'm in white and green !!! I love gold jewellery with all my heart it just hits different for me <33333

u better love cruel summer. but I SO GET BEING IN A dbm mood , because that's so real. poison ivyyyyy now I'm your daisyyyyyy.

bro now I'm scared. now my timbers have been shivered. (I'm on chapter two still for reference.) I LOVE LOVE LOVE . (and I heard them stolen lullabies all right)

gonna go buy one from the big Tesco 2nite , now you've convinced me. (Rome , the great city. of piss. and gladiators. but mostly piss.)

HALL BLOCKERS WILL GO TO HELL knock them bitches over like do u even know how many times I've been late because of them ??? little bastards.

two middle names is kinda fun actually. I can go by them if I won't (I don't want) and I just have more names in my name , yk?? ( one middle name is ALSO cool btw. )

it makes me cry a lil. (professor lupin???? no , uncle moony !!!!)

winter for me , because in England , even when it's summer , it's winter !!! (also thank u for calling it autumn , not fall.) BUT I LOVE AUTUMN TOO , PUMPKIN LATTES ARE STELLAR !!!

I have my chemistry exam tomorrow !! and I do bio too unfortunately. (I have the bio exam today. I feel queasy. ) BUT YEAH FUCK PHYSICS FUCK NEWTON FUCK ELECTRICITY !!!!!

I so get u bee , I too just wanna be magic.

eruditessssss!!! erudite erudite erudite !!!!

I love coins omg. I want them all. I'm on the lookout for the paddington one , and I feel it in the air. I think I'm very close to it. (also glow in the dark ??? that's so cool???)

nah , I get relating to a song so hard. I too relate to songs. ( u relating to mirrorball is so fucking real of u. so real.)

YES PHOENIX !!!! AND U CAN HEAL BASILISK TEARS TOO , DON'T FORGET !!!!! (unicorns>>>>)

I know , if not for the racism and other shit , I'd so visit the '50s. honestly , the old-times vibes and the dinners and just- ahhhhh. (damn misogyny is everywhere.that fucking sucks I hate that sm)

I KNOW I KNOW. the bookstore thing is so so so cool for me. (closest I've ever come is the grocery store at night with lu , but also we were drunk and also we bought so so so many things) and yes!! just chatting and laughing and having fun and - being , yk???

I did take it hard. I took it so hard. (I scored , but I still didn't get in?? well bitch damn I hope u lose every single game !!)

getting competitive with monopoly is something different (I've stolen some money before , and now I'm not allowed to be the banker !! so that sucks.) I'm going to learn chess one day. I will. I want to play. I shall learn it.

OMG SISGDLIWQHVDJLWQVCBX your mom sounds so cool???? Van Gogh recreations ??? I salute her she sounds fucking amazing (cafe terrace at night is just it for me. I love it. I even have a notebook with it on the front !!!)

---- I'm taking a break from answering because I have to go do a fuckin exam now give me a second ----

back now lmfao totally fucking flunked fuck biology & fuck life , but at least my arse is being warmed and i’m listening to taylor. (i think i’m being driven to the bakery. i think. he won’t say anything. but we’re not going home for sure.)

YOUR MOM JUST GETS IT FR FR. van gogh is my favourite artist too , so she understands. he a tortured soul me a tortured soul. done & dusted.

reviewing your q’s

OMG THAT’S SO CUTE ????? I’M IN TEARS ????? that’s so romantic omg i hope u get that one day i really really do.(feel free to info dump on me anytime.) AND YESSSS ART AND HISTORY AND HUMANITY STAY WINNING ALWAYS (my favourite art museum is tate and fave history one is the natural history museum in central london i love it so so much.) AHHH OMG PICKING OUT BOOKS FOR EACH OTHER ??? (and annotating them and talking about them and showing each other and oh my god romance romance 💘) I LOVE CONSTELLATIONS TOO. as an ex-astronomy student , i understand the stories and fucking love info-dumping about them. (lu has been the unfortunate victim of most of this dumping.)

rep for when you are in ur rep era is so real. I need that album for killing and revenge and shit. lover is the vibe i want my life to feel like , so i’d pick lover too.

HOZIER IS IN MY BONES. I TOO WANT TO CRAWL OUT OF MY GRAVE. I TOO WANT TO WORSHIP AT SOMEONE’S SHRINE. I TOO WANT TO BE THE ANGEL OF SMALL DEATH AND THE CODEINE SCENE!!!!!! hozier > am (i love am too though don’t get me wrong they’re bae<333)

i hate physical activity too , mate. . I LIKE BADMINTON TOO SOMETIMES THAT SHUTTLECOCK IS FUN TO BAT AROUND. (only sometimes.) all i shall do is watch lu do his sports. i shall do nothing else. (hating sports is so valid of us !!!)

take me to church hits different but work song >>> no grave can hold my body down FUVKING CHANGED MY LIFE. i will rise from the dead for my other half when i die.

u described it so right , autumn is like that. just right. very remus of you , methinks. BUT CHRISTMAS FOR THE WIN , I’M SORRY !!!

ooh , an italian *does the hands* (sorry but you know i had to) you said a lot of pasta i will have to now eat. i will eat all of them. me , personally , my dad is portuguese a so i got a fucking range of food when i was a kid . like francesinha , bacalhau , caldo verde >>>> (sandwich , fish , soup in that order. all vv spicy.)

HE SO HAS THAT BLACK CAT ENERGY. regulus black is a black cat 2023 spread the word. as a shower singer , i vv much agree james would do that. oooh sirius is a left-hand. yk what i actually like that one . JILY AGENDA WHERE SHE’S THE SLEEPY ONE AND HE’S THE GET UP AND GO ONE <3333

I too do not much rate the dorcas/peter. it’s surprising now especially because of the dorlene and how i think they’re perfect for each other. so obviously , i don’t want them to get with anyone else . and reg/remus ??? that’s odd. i might be hoodwinked into reading a one-shot here & there but nothing more than that.

rattle snake , grey owl and raven ??? that’s a slytherin if i ever saw one. (also ravenclaw potential tbh.) and what a range of animals ??? fabulous.

I LOOKED AT THEM AND OH MY GOD THEY’RE SO GOOD ???? I LOVE THEM TOO NOW DAMN THEY’RE FABULOUS.

u have luna’s wand. i am very jealous rn. (love ginny but i agree with your decision to pick luna. i love her too much to pick anyone else.)

gyoza sounds so good. i could really go for some rn. (late night mcdonalds SMACKS.) and no we don’t have dairy queen in the uk. is that like an ice cream thing ?? sounds like that?? i want to try that now.

iced coffee >>>> AND OH MY GOD THERE’S THIS SODA AT THE CORNER SHOP ‘BARRS CREAM SODA’ I GET IT SO OFTEN IT’S MY FAVOURITE FIZZY DRINK EVER AHHHH. (i need 2 try sangria. i need to. ‘tis on my list.)

my q’s. -

this is me trying . there’s probably more that I can’t think of rn , but this is me trying. I am this is me trying. i used to be the one gifted kid who got rlly high scores without trying and now i have to do twice as much work for a fucking B. which is annoying. but yeah! ( I might tell u more if I remember them next time.)

black swan! i think that’s pretty cool actually !!!!

my tears ricochet. (or cruel summer) but if i had to choose , my tears ricochet. EVERY FUCKING TIME. ‘STOLEN LULLABIES OOOWIWOHOOO’

shapeshifting !! i think i’d love to shapeshift. it’d be so fun , i’m a snake , i’m a lion , i’m an old woman , i’m a muscle man. FUNNNN.

messy as fuck. 90% of the time my socks come back from the wash and at least one is missing at all times. fucking dk where they go man.

YOU HAVE UNLOCKED SOMETHING HERE.okay , terry’s chocolate orange & smarties. I fucking LOVE smarties (& toblerone of course , we mustn’t forget the Toblerone.) AND ALSO JAFFA CAKES. CANNOT CHOOSE ONE.

SHAKESPEARE. need 2 ask about the ‘fair youth’ and also about his wife & about his plays and ahhhh. i love his plays sm and i just really would love to meet him<333

work song. i love take me to church sm , but work song . why??? “NO GRAVE CAN HOLD MY BODY DOWN , I’LL CRAWL HOME TO HER.”

promiscous , worth it , one look , knee socks , jealous (nj) , & …ready for it ? THESE ARE CLASSICSSSS . HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS MIX.

snow. by far. love making snowmen , n dressing them up and snowball fights. love it so so so much.

i did lady macbeth (n lu was macbeth) at a halloween party once!! I loved it vv much the fake blood and the scorpion prop , and the crown i made for lu. very realistic. (second is it and georgie. u know who it was and who georgie was. take a guess .)

q’s for u -

fuck marry kill - lily , pandora , marlene.

fuck marry kill - regulus , barty, evan.

what do you love spending money on ?

tell me one inside joke you have with liz (or just anyone, i only assume you’d have more with liz)

one weird fear you have?

weirdest dare you’ve taken in a game of truth or dare?

worst random impulse buy?

your favourite quote ever ?

your favourite quote from a fic ?

ever met a celeb ? (which one if yes?)

favourite snack ?

do u have a crush on anyone ? (skip this one if you don’t want to answer it & I’m terribly sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable!!!)

Who knows you best ?

lover (the song) vs getaway car?

all time favourite moment in your life ?

what’s your favourite moment with liz ? (curious to cut into that bff dynamic)

r(egg) or r(edge)?

do you speak any other languages (except english)?

bee bee bee <333 until next time , my friend. come back soon , or else i’ll start worrying.