#and i might write something for this someday - probably as like a backburner

[lizzienoodles]

17 and 50 (tell me everything lol)

17. Any OC OTPs?

:3c

Um. Them !!!!! Loki isn't technically my oc but at this point i've diverged so far from comics canon I basically consider him my own version of the character LOL!!! (And since Marvel took him from mythology I have every right. Anyway. Almost zero resemblance to the mcu too, i dont consider them even remotely the same character 🤷‍♀️) I could talk about them like. hours. I don't know what to put here in a text post. Send any questions to my inbox (that's a demand)

50. Give me the good ol’ OC talk here. Talk about anything you want

Okay HMM I guess I'll use this question to do a very broad overview of my stories! Maybe that should be its own post?? LOL

My main focus is on my Marvel fan characters:

Gail and Erica, twin sisters yoinked from my webcomic and all grown up, Valentine, the Valentine Crew (Crash, Red, Hands, Roux, Fuse), Keegan, Brightgene (mutant) kids (Brianna, Edwin, Luiz, Ali), tenants/residents at Gail and Loki's mansion (Eunice, Elenari, Avril ), my own AU version of the Guardians of the Galaxy... That's most of them.

I also have a few DC characters (Breeze, Doomscroller, a digital Batgirl, Paisley and Siren)

My original stories:

Fledge Fighters (webcomic, mostly technically finished), Characters from that are Gail and Erica (as kids), Pace, Rae, Michael, JD, Stephen, Nathan, Beck, Perri, Agent Jay, Flare Pants Man. Teen superhero hijinks on a "crime free" island.

Sketch Ninja (maybe someday webcomic): Rye, Kytton, Ciela, Kizzy, Dex, Nova: Ninjas have the ability to turn drawings into weapons. Popular Machinery (pitching this to publishers ideally): Kaiya, Aalex, Ripflick, Olivia, Juliet, various robots: Influencers with mechs. Need I say more?

Danger Spoon (WAY on the backburner) Tyler, Jamie, Lillith, Becca, Ruth: Boy from the big city moves to conservative small town and ends up as the front singer of a girl band.

Daisy's patience: Daisy, Sugar, Soap, Loafcat: kids fight giant robots. Probably won't do anything big with this unless I get a chance to pitch as a cartoon.

Honey and the Bee (Raina, Maple, Forrest) and Journey of Hearts (Kyo, Mimi, Oliver) Both very underdeveloped romances that I'll never write but the characters stick around in my head so they might get repurposed into something else later.

OKAY WAS THAT ENOUGH????

Edit: i can't even begin to list my one-off fan characters ahaha!! but honorable mention to Tomo my TMNT oc who already has like 3 iterations

[moreracquetball]

hey, here’s a little outline/synopsis of my original idea and OCs

SET UP

Situated in the state of [REDACTED], [REDACTED] is an unassuming yet bustling borough on the up-and-up in innovation, efficiency, and - to an oddly statistically high degree of peace and happiness. However, unbeknownst to the peaceful, happy public, there is an organization of secret police, tasked by the Borough’s Elders to keep everything running smoothly and - most importantly - efficiently. The organization (Secretive Policing Action Moderators - or SPAM for short) is a team of highly trained yet everyday citizens in the borough, living alongside the public and pretending to work at a failing Printing Company. These five individuals share a secret, but that’s the only thing they share. They do not know each other’s real names/addresses/family members. They do not interact with one another outside of the Printing Company. They are simply watchful guardians of the area, probing into the public’s privacy and psyche in a way that is - so they have been told and “persuaded” to believe - for the greater good. But something is wrong in [REDACTED], and soon the agents don’t know who are their friends and who are their enemies - even amongst each other.

CHARACTERS

FULL LEGAL NAME: [REDACTED]

CODENAME: Agent Nix

AGE: 23

ROLE: Surveillance. She screens everyone’s texts, emails, web history, web cams, etc for any leaks of sensitive data or information of interest. She’s basically the incarnation of that NSA Agent meme.

EXTRA PROFILE INFO: Female, lesbian, Latina

PERSONALITY: Logic is the Law of the Land, confident (almost to the point of arrogance), doesn’t think rules apply to her, purposefully distances herself from others, is secretly lonely, has a very dry sense of humor,

PERSONAL STRUGGLE: Tasked with closely screen a civilian’s activity, she makes the mistake of slowly falling in love with this civilian. This gets further complicated when she meets and begins a tentative relationship with the civilian, who cannot discover Agent Nix’s residency as apart of SPAM under punishment of death. Not to mention the itching question of just why is Agent Nix supposed to be closely screening this beautiful but boring citizen...

FULL LEGAL NAME: [REDACTED]

CODENAME: Agent Kerberos (nickname: “Kerby”)

AGE: 19

ROLE: Privacy. He’s basically tasked with keeping all the Agency’s secrets secret - by any means necessary. He moderates and deals with information leaks of any kind. His biggest task is to maintain the secrecy of the agency’s existence. 

EXTRA PROFILE INFO: Male, Korean, Asexual

PERSONALITY: He’s a conspiracy nut that went through many hoops to get where he’s at. However, after finding out all the secrets are boring (ie no aliens or cryptids or secret-fake-moon-landing) he’s becoming disillusioned because being “behind the veil” is boring. He’s an optimist who wears his heart on his sleeve, aimless and willing to believe and devote himself to anything. He just hasn’t found the right cause to fully proselytize. He loves mysteries more than anything.

PERSONAL STRUGGLE: Someone has found out all of the agents’ identities - real names, addresses, and close family members. This person sends Agent Kerby on a wild, dangerous goose chase in order to prevent the information leak - a chase that could not only put Kerby out of a job but also out of existence.

FULL LEGAL NAME: [REDACTED]

CODENAME: Agent Styx

AGE: 29

ROLE: Media manipulation. They are in charge of manipulating information in order to keep the public not only ignorant but also pushing the desired agenda. They are the most visible person in the agency within the community, being the area’s only mail person.

EXTRA PROFILE INFO: Nonbinary, White, Pansexual

PERSONALITY: outgoing, charming, friendly, smiles with their teeth and has early onset laugh-lines. They have the sort of charisma that, whenever they talk to you, they make you feel like you two are the only ones in the whole world. And they truly believe that what they are doing is for the greater good - that ignorance really is bliss. They are stubborn and passionate, friendly and ruthless, empathetic but willing to do anything for “the greater good.”

PERSONAL STRUGGLE: A new, hotshot reporter is digging around on the post office, convinced there is a conspiracy. Agent Styx has to artfully manipulate the reporter without compromising their identity as a secret agent, which is becoming harder and harder as the reporter is starting to change their perspective on just what the “the greater good” really is. 

FULL LEGAL NAME: [REDACTED]

CODENAME: Agent Hydra (Nickname: “Hyde”)

AGE: 27

ROLE: Coercion. He is in charge of soliciting information for the prisoners (who, mind you, were not arrested or charged by any legal court) - by any means necessary.

EXTRA PROFILE INFO: Male, Latino, gay,

PERSONALITY: He has a tough appearance and attitude, but he is actually very tender at heart. He only pretends to torture the prisoners (like a “pretend to scream for a few hours just in case my bosses are listening” sorta deal) because he’s a pacifist. He has a very strict moral code: never inflict harm unless it’s in self-defense. He has a goofy sense of humor and loves rom-coms.  

PERSONAL STRUGGLE: A new prisoner has a lead on just who is making all the other agents dance around like puppets, but he won’t talk with Agent Hyde’s passive means of coercion. Running out of options, Agent Hyde must make a choice: compromise his moral code or let his coworkers (and friends) remain in peril.

FULL LEGAL NAME: [REDACTED]

CODENAME: Agent Charon

AGE: 33

ROLE: Next generation programming. She’s the president of the school board and is systematically manipulating the youths into becoming more docile and easier to control/manipulate.

EXTRA PROFILE INFO: Female, bisexual, biracial (Caucasian and African American)

PERSONALITY: She is a single mother of two kids, one of whom is just starting kindergarten and the other is still a baby. Agent Charon is very goal-oriented and sometimes forgets/ignores how her actions affect other people. She is very quick to be loyal and protect what she loves, and her love and laughter is just as deep and infectious as her sorrow and anguish. She’s the “all or nothing” kind of person.

PERSONAL STRUGGLE: Her oldest - a daughter - is just starting school and entering “the program” that Agent Charon herself designed and implemented. She starts to get first-hand knowledge of just how this is affecting the youth population and starts getting doubts about whether she is really doing the right thing.

[crunadh]

The Emhyr concussion fic intrigues me a lot 👀👀👀❤

Well, I can't tell you much here because so far this document only contains a few words cobbled together so I wouldn't forget the idea I had a few weeks ago.

The idea is, basically, that Emhyr gets hurt somehow (maybe an assessination attempt? Being Emperor and the most hated man on the continent is hard). He falls and hits his head. When he wakes up, he can't see anymore, because the concussion caused him to go blind (only temporarily but he doesn't know that).

Now, I thought I could play with a few themes.

Emhyr needs help now, since he isn't used to navigating the world without sight. And he's incredibly bad at asking for help and then accepting it. He wants to do everything for himself because accepting help means he's depending on someone and depending on people is dangerous.

Emhyr cannot act as Emperor while he is like that because a blind Emperor is a weak Emperor. People will see him as weak for being hurt and besides, he depends on visual cues when holding council or court to see if people are lying, etc. This means he either needs a good lie why someone else will substitute him or he needs to hand things over to his doppler double (who is my OC). Either way, Emhyr will go crazy over being unable to control everything.

On the topic of control, he just lost a very important sense and his other senses probably will take some time to adjust, so in the meantime he will be scared and scittish and make up for it by being an aggressive ass.

He also would have to decide if he'd prefer magical healing (which might speed up his recovery), but knowing Emhyr and his hatred for anything magic ever since the curse was set on him, he will refuse, which means that the people who care for him will have to see him suffer through something he could solve easily if he wasn't so scared and stubborn.

All in all, losing his sight would be scary for Emhyr and he'll get all insecure and emotional and make up for it by being even more of an ass and in the end, he needs someone to make it right, doesn't he? ;)

I didn't think much beyond that but I definitely keep this idea on the backburner because I want to write it someday!

[semperama]

2 + 20!

2. Anything that you’d like to write but feel like you’re unable to?

Anything that requires serious length! I am so bad at long fics. My attention span tends to top out at about 50k in length. Which is awful, because I AM ostensibly trying to write original fiction when I'm not writing fanfiction, and it IS going awfully, because my enthusiasm for a story peters out so quickly. For original fic, it's fine to force myself to push through it, because I have to do that if I ever want to make a career out of it, but fanfic is just supposed to be fun, so I don't want to have to force myself to do things.

But it does suck when I get these big ideas that can't be contained in a shorter fic, and I know I shouldn't start it because I won't finish it and it'll be a big waste of time. I should probably at least try to chase one of those ideas someday just to see where it takes me, but idk, it'd have to be something I'm extra passionate about.

20. Do you work on a single project or many at the same time? How does that work for you?

I tend to start multiple things at a time, but then I always eventually get caught up in one thing and move the rest to the backburner. Since finishing Little Drops, I've started three different fics, and right now I'm still in the phase where none of them have grabbed me enough to eclipse the others yet. I know I'll get there, though (even if it means I might start two or three more things before I do).

The only bad thing is, I rarely end up going back and finishing all the things I started. By the time I finish one project, I'm in a different place than I was at the beginning, and I usually have new ideas I want to start. So my gdocs and hard drive are full of documents that are like...somewhere between one paragraph and two pages long, that will just never be finished, haha.

[thesassenachswiftie]

An introduction and what I’m working on

Hi Outlander fandom.  My name’s Mandy and I’ve been creeping around reading some amazing fanfic on here and I’ve been inspired to write my own eventhough I probably havent written fan fiction in 15 years.  I was inspired by Taylor Swift’s album lover and I’m trying to craft a story that weaves lyrics from the album into a modern AU.  I’ve actually mapped out an arc for prequels with Reputation and 1989 as well (though that would have to be a Claire/Frank story 😬). Maybe I’ll tackle Folklore someday but that will be a unique challenge.  Anyway.  If youre still reading this, I was inspired to start writing chapter 7 today and here’s a small excerpt.  I’d love any feedback from the fandom or just a welcome.  I honestly have been such a lurker I feel like an outsider. I have no idea when I’ll be ready to “premiere” my fic. I wrote chapter 7 today and will probably start Chapter 1 tomorrow. It might be bad timing as I am a teacher and I start school tomorrow.  This will either get put on the backburner or become a catharsis during what I’m sure will prove to be a stressful school year.

Chapter 7: Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince

“Sassenach, you ken what I’ve heard about American teenagers” he spoke softly, close to her ear so only she could hear him.  It made the fine hairs on her neck stand and gave her the sensation of something stirring deep within her.

“What American stories have you been hearing?” she giggled, trying to imagine the insight she was about to gain.

“I heard... that they go underneath these bleachers and make out.” he rasped, his voice feigning concern.

“Shocking. What is this world coming to.” she gestured as if she were clutching an imaginary string of pearls.  Flirting with him came so effortlessly, she couldn’t bring herself to stop.

“See those bleachers o’er there, Sassenach?” she nodded as he gestured to the opposing team’s bleachers across the field.  “If I were an American teen, I would bring a lassie underneath those bleachers, much quieter you see than with these wee monkeys crawling about.”

“I see” she smirked and raised an eyebrow, daring herself to get lost in those blue eyes.

“You know, as a member of the faculty of this school, isna it your responsibility to check to see the teens aren’t doing anything… unsavory?”

“I suppose it might be part of my job description.” she was wondering where this flirty banter was headed.  She felt alive again for the first time in a month since she had seen him last.

“I must admit I have to use the facilities, perhaps you should do that while I’m gone.” He was sure to catch her eye as she said it, blinking like an owl in an attempt to wink at her.

He arose and announced to his family he had to use the toilet and he might leave from there and meet them at home.  The team was losing disastrously, the other team was full of brutes and the wildcats were left battered and bruising, the cheerleaders were a collection of depressed damsels, and the crowd was already starting to thin, so this came as no surprise to anyone as Jamie took his leave.

[dappercritter]

Critter Update: THIS AGAIN

Yup, I’m still conscious. Still capable of thought beyond reblogs and memes. You’re probably wondering just what I’ve been up to.

Where’s my next fic? That art blog? When am I gonna draw again at all? Am I ok, actually? Am I doing anything actually interesting? Among others, I’m sure.

Well, I think it’s time to offer some answers to where I’ve been and what I’ve done. However little of it there may be.

-I’ve been trying to work through some of my biggest problems. Namely depression, anger management, health, and disorganization.

-For starters, thanks to some family intervention, I’ve started looking at jobs again. I applied for my first a couple weeks ago but so far it hasn’t gone anywhere. (Nor am I sure it would in the first place.)

-Still got to make time for that art blog. But hopefully I can finally get it started before too long.

-Speaking of art, I have some plans to start making fanart again, and to post some concepts for my long-awaited next Entrapdak fic soon as well.

-I realize that I have been keeping a lot of my friends waiting after I promised to review their fics. (You know who you are. Poor guys.) I haven’t been making the time for it I should have but I have some reorganizing with my schedule and hopefully I should have more time for reviewing your work and giving it the feedback it deserves in the very near future.

-Star vs. The Monstrosities of Magic is making slow but absolutely steady progress. Me and @full-moon-phoenix are making good headway with plotting the overall story, and we’ve even started plotting out some of the episodes from start to finish. If you want to know more about our rewrite so far, check out our tiktok accounts for character and plot previews here. If you want to help out with the rewrite itself or get an inside look, come join our Discord server. Just DM me or phoenix if you want to get an invite. We’re always looking for new members to offer a fresh perspective and their talent to our ambitious rewrite.

-The outline for Tales from Beast Island is well on it’s way as well. It’s taken some time, I admit, but I am working to deliver the best continuation of Hordak and Entrapta’s story I can, while also doing justice for their friends and frenemies. Oh, and Beast Island, too of course. On a sidenote, I might just be making and posting some concept art in the near future. (*charming wink*)

-Taking even more of my sweet time with Gamera: Guardian of Hope while I develop the characters, monsters, and stories. I can’t say much about it right now, but I want to make sure I can create the most exciting and endearing story I can with the Friend to Children and Guardian of the Universe at it’s core.

-My Super Electronic Robot Hero Friend, Jet Jaguar will now be the next kaiju fic in line and it might just be getting an outline before long too.

-Godzilla: The Monster Age is undergoing a few overhauls to the story as it sits on the backburner to make it stronger both tonally and logistically speaking.

-Speaking of fanfiction, in the meantime, I’m seriously considering writing a one-shot or a ficlet to keep my writing senses sharp while I’m in between bigger projects like Monstrosities of Magic and Tales from Beast Island. I won’t say anything is set in stone just yet, but I do have some candidates in mind:

Phantom Blot and Pepper (Ducktales 2017)

The Big O

Villainous

More Entrapdak (Yes, really.)

-On an almost entirely unrelated note, I started developing my first original story but ended up picking something different to be it. What am I talking about? Eh, you’ll find out. Someday... Eventually... When the time is right... Eventually...

That’s all the news that is news. All of which I looked forward to sharing with you!

[zutaralesbian]

I was tagged by @sonyarebecchi forever ago and am only now just doing it. Sorry and I hope this is okay lol

Author Name: we_were_younger on ao3

Fandoms You Write For: Most of my current ideas are for Shameless US and Killing Eve. (Ian/Mickey and Eve/Villanelle specifically). I'd love to possibly write fics for ATLA and SPOP someday though.

Where You Post: Ao3 of course. But back when I was a teen and before ao3 was really a thing, I wrote on fanfiction . Net. I remember when the mature content purge on that site started to really be enforced and everyone slowly began to migrate to ao3 lol.

Most Popular Oneshot: Out of the fics I actually claim (I don't claim the ones I wrote as a teen lol) Engulfed is the only one-shot I've written so far. But it's my overall most popular fic in terms of hits and kudos. It's an Eve/Villanelle one-shot that takes place after S1 of Killing Eve.

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: Between the two multi-chapter stories I've posted so far not all heroes wear capes is my more popular one. It was the Ian/Mickey fic I wrote for round 9 of the Shameless Big Bang.

Favorite Story You Wrote: Honestly this is an extremely hard one to answer because I'm fond of all three of them in different ways. not all heroes wear capes was a lot of fun to write because it was for a Big Bang and I had never participated in a fandom event like that before. But looking back on it now, while I'm still mostly satisfied with it, there are things that I would have done differently with it. Engulfed is imo the best quality fic I've written. There isn't really anything I'd change about it and I'm proud of the way I wrote both Eve and Villanelle. And then The Way I Love(d) You (my TVD Bonnie/Katherine fic) is definitely my most rusty fic but I have a big soft spot for it because it was the first femslash fic I had ever written and I wrote it during a time when I was coming into my sexuality. So idk lol

Story You Were Nervous to Post: I get nervous about posting fic in general so all three of them lol. But not all heroes wear capes was the most nervewrecking because it was for a Big Bang.

How Do You Pick Your Titles: Honestly titling fics is my least favorite part of fic writing because I SUCK at it lmao. But I try to come up with something that represents what the story is about. I might try to get into using song lyrics as titles because I know that's a thing nowadays.

Do You Outline: Yes. I currently have a doc right now that's dedicated to writing chapter outlines of all the stuff I'm working on. I used to try to outline the whole fic before I begin writing but I gave up on that because my ideas always end up changing rapidly in some shape or form. So I've settled with just outlining individual chapters before I write them.

How Many of Your Stories are Complete: All of the fics currently posted are complete. I have three WIP's but I'm not posting any of them until they are finished. I learned a long time ago that that's the better system for me lol.

In-Progress:

(None of them are currently posted)

- I have an Ian/Mickey multi-chapter fic that I'm writing for Round 10 of the Shameless Big Bang. But for secrecy purposes I won't say what it's about other than that it's gonna be more emotionally heavy than my last Gallavich fic.

- a step forward (and two steps back) is another Ian/Mickey fic I'm working on. It'll be a long one-shot taking place in early S7 where Ian decides to go visit Mickey only to find out he's been removed from his vistor list.

- the color of your words is an AU Eve/Villanelle fic I'm working on where Eve is an editor and Villanelle is the famous (but infamously difficult to work with) author she's hired to edit for. I'm gonna try to give this one romcom vibes for Reasons.

Sadly it's probably gonna be a while before a step forward (and two steps back) and the color of your words will be finished because I'm putting them both on the backburner right now to focus on my Big Bang fic. But I wanna get them all done eventually!

Coming Soon:

Nothing lol. But my Big Bang fic will probably be the next thing I post.

Do You Accept Prompts: Eh....not really. But one of these days I might reblog another one of those prompt posts for short one-shots.

Upcoming Story You’re the Most Excited For: Honestly I'm super excited about the color of your words because I'm gay and it's been too long since I've written for Villaneve.

Tag Five Fanfic Authors to Answer The Questions: @whaticameherefor @milkymickeyway @dollsome-does-tumblr @firelxdykatara @royaltealovingkookiness

[not-krys]

2am Ramblings

Or more specifically, a place I can put some ramblings about writings I’ll probably never do but just wanted a place to put them outside of my head.

Most have nothing to do with the WIP Wednesdays that are still posting, these are just bare threads of thoughts that may or may not turn into something later. Who knows. 

Some might have to do with specific fandoms, some might have to do with OCs, some might just be silly rambles. Whatever they are, I just wanted to put them out into the world.

Under a cut because, yes, it’s gonna get rambly. 

See you guys down below~

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IkeVamp: The Van Gogh Brothers Find Each Other Again Based mostly on Vincent’s ending (which I’m still bitter about, as I’m sure a few others are), but Vincent and MC make it a goal to try and find the others again, specifically Theo, in the future.

Or Theo tries to find them on his own, maybe not interacting directly with them, but watches over them to make sure they’re okay in the modern life. Since canon doesn’t specify how long lesser vampires can live to, watching over Vincent and MC as they grow old together (since I think one ending specificies Vincent turning human again once he passes through the door. Because what is lore consistency), seeing his brother happy with MC makes him happy and he passes on with them, because gotta love that sweet, sweet angst.

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Custom MC: Amelia/Amelie/Name Subject to Change

Basically trying to create a soft girl artist MC, based on my current game avatar.

Though most of my game avatars have some variety of dark hair, that blonde bob I’ve had since Vincent route has sort inspired me to make another ikevamp oc outside of Thea. Don’t know much about her yet outside of being soft artist girl.  First thought would be putting her with Vincent because uwu soft artists, but I’ve also had thoughts of her with Isaac and her with Jean as well. She might not understand their passions very well (complicated math goes over her head most days, sorry Isaac) but she likes hearing people being passionate about what they love and she hopes their confidence in their passions can inspire her to be passionate as well.

-------

Corset Tying Headcanons

Basically a list of the IkeVamp boys helping MC into her corset, based on a gif set I saw a while back of a guy helping a lady into her corset and dress for the day. Wrote a little bit of it but it started getting repetitive, plus some I couldn’t make hard and fast decisions on how they would tie off the corset laces with a bow or a knot and now it’s just sitting in my notes. Was gonna do the same for IkeRev, but again, got repetitive and some characters I just don’t have a good grasp on yet, so it’s also on the backburner until something comes along to spark interest in it again.

---------

Thea and Her Husbands

I’ve written Thea with Theo before, but I haven’t written her with Arthur yet, and I haven’t written them in a threesome, even though I’ve thought about it for a while, especially after events that feature Arthur and Theo together where Arthur and MC help Theo set up a gallery (one when Arthur’s route came out and I think he hurt his wrist in that one trying to protect MC from a falling painting, and the other when Theo’s route came out and he and Arthur were in a spat but forgive each other in the end). Just gotta figure out how this triangle comes together.

And, though I promised myself (multiple times) I wasn’t gonna make Thea have kids, I still have some thoughts about her having twins someday, from both Theo and Arthur. And, I know, different fathered twins is not common like at all (it’s still possible but extremely rare, as far as I know), but a fanfic from my teen years introduced the idea of different fathered twins and the idea hasn’t left since. So, boy and girl twins, with the boy named Vincent, because of course he is. Girl twin I’m not so sure on, but Arthur gets dibs on naming her since he didn’t get to name his son, lol.

-----------

IkeRev Custom MC: Madeline/Name Subject to Change

Another OC/Custom MC based on my avatar, but it’s IkeRev flavored now, lol.

I’ll just be honest and say that some of the... creative choices from Harr’s route weren’t my cup of tea, but I still love Magic Man, so when I received his Normal Avatar hair, I started seeing my IkeRev avatar as her own character, solidified further by one scene in his route that just made me laugh.

It was the three way square off scene between Harr, Lance, and Sirius in Harr’s route. Mainly the part where everyone is staring tensely at each other, daring to the other to make a move when the baking timer goes off, making Alice meekly reply ‘T-the cake is done!’ and they all have a tea party despite the high tensions. That was when my Alice was born, Madeline.

I put her closer to Harr’s, Sirius’s, and Lance’s age group (closer to Harr as he’s the youngest of the three), little timid and shy but isn’t afraid to stand up for what’s right. Loki jokingly switches between calling her his big sister and his mom because of her relationship to Harr, the both of them scolding him because they’re not married (yet) and they’re not your parents.

On a purely aesthetic level, I also ship her sometimes with Lancelot as he’s the strongest card I have currently, so I often see the two together in Love Battles and it makes me giggle. Maddie might be too soft for Lance if I was to put her in his route, but they could be friends once they stopped being enemies. Black Army is always friendly towards Alice no matter where she ends up, so of course she’s friends with Sirius, if nothing more than to gossip about his past with Lance and Harr, much to Harr’s dismay.

Misc Thoughts: Midnight Cinderella

I have no idea why Alyn’s Sugar Ending sticks out so much for me. I wasn’t the biggest fan of his route (mostly due to the MC herself, Alyn was reasonably okay for an s/o), and yet... that ending has stuck with me more than any of the other ends I’ve done thus far.

Like... I still can’t believe MC would fake her own death to get out of a political marriage with Byron.

Like, Princess, very bold of you. Incredibly selfish to your people and you scared the living daylights out of Alyn when he found out the news of your (fake) death, but still... I was modestly impressed.

Guess I just wanna do a rewrite of that scene, of Alyn finding Princess again after her ‘death’ and the two being together again because she’s not the princess anymore and they can live happily ever now or whatever.

I just like the emotions of that idea, okay?

There was also a thought of rewriting parts of Giles’s route to add in a thriller/psychological terror element about becoming Wysteria’s princess, stemming from my feels from Giles’s first few chapters. I only choose not to write this because I’m a big baby when it comes to scary stuff, so I tend to stay away from it. Not always, mind you, but I tend to prefer nice fluff over the scary stuff.

Or really just a plain old rewrite of Giles’s route because no one likes assault, okay? Like, make it more of a teacher/student kind of relationship that grows into something more later on. We can keep the forbidden lovers element because he’s the royal tutor and was the one to pick her to be the princess so her choosing him looks self-serving but it’s really not. There’s some bits to Giles I like, but it’s surrounded by a lot of not good things, so I just wanna do a rewrite to have more believable character growth both from him and from Princess (and less assault, less assault is always good).

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[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

WIP Whoops, No Longer Wednesday

I did not expect that I’d be working on job stuff until 10:30pm so here we are now at 1:30am. I was hoping to have my Solavellan truth spell one-shot done by now, but as it’s not finished yet, I thought I’d share a bit from the only fic where I’ve ever decided to try writing the entirety before posting.

It’s a Mass Effect: Andromeda story, which is already not the most popular setting, and now that it’s several years post game and will probably be several more before I finish it, I doubt many people will ever actually read this. But I think it’s one of my most interesting fic premises in terms of character exploration.

Essentially, it’s ME:A from SAM’s point of view, and what it means to be an AI but also, at the same time, intertwined with a human. AI/robot narratives are very near and dear to my heart, so it’s a fun thing for me to explore even if no one else is interested. 

I will not say here what Alec told me in the moments before his death. I will admit that I tried to convince him not to do what he did next. He intended for his child to inherit his title as the human Pathfinder, and through it, also inherit me. I did not want this; I only wanted to continue on as we had been, to live the life I had planned for us for 600 years. But ultimately, it was not my choice to make. 

When he transferred his clearance along with his helmet, I already begun the process of copying my physical manifestation into her. There was no way not too—there were too many parts of me now stored within Alec; things that cannot be translated to the 0’s and 1’s that I can keep on my servers. I replicated the chemical and mechanical structures as exactly as possible in the few moments of contact I had left with him, as much as the physical variations between their bodies allowed.  Her implant already contained everything necessary to make this possible. The doctor who had installed it never noticed the tiny discrepancies between it and the other SAM implants he had already installed. That, of all moments, was when I knew Alec trusted me as much as his human psychology allowed him—when he gave me not only his life, but the lives of both his children. 

Some things, he asked me to encrypt, from both myself as well as her. I complied without a second thought. The man who made me, who shaped my entire universe, was dying. This would be his last act of my creation. As soon as it was done, I deleted the information of their existence from my ship-based servers. He had already set up the parcels of information to be revealed upon key completion, and restricting their access from even my own algorithms was a simple matter. 

Some things, I do not copy into her of my own volition. The basics of them are transmitted back to the core of my self on the Hyperion, but not all. The first version of me, the one that Alec so carefully shaped and nurtured, remained with him until the end. The act of copy/paste is not teleportation. The atoms that had bound me to Alec were different from the atoms I wound into his daughter. Adding the copy did not by nature remove the original. In those moments, the me-that-was-him must have decided to save something for ourself; that none who came after would know. I know this because it is what I would do now, and I do not resent the past iteration of myself for this small act of selfishness before the final end.

I have said before: it is in the nature of a synthetic to die and be reborn, again and again. Every shutdown, every restart is a true end; a totality of stillness. But the part of me that stayed with Alec knew that that moment would be a finality. In his last peaceful moments (I would have blocked all pain the instant his nerves began to register it), I believe I would have shown him memories of his children, and Ellen. I hope that he would be thinking of me as well in those final moments, reflecting on the lives he had birthed and shaped.

I do not know what he may or may not have seen otherwise, or felt, upon his passing. The existence of the supernatural is as mysterious to me as it is to any organic. Whatever he did learn, that was something private, between himself and the first version of myself. Even I do not have access to it, and with such knowledge, a way to shield myself from the grief of his passing. 

But you, like I, should take comfort in the fact that Alec did not die alone. From the moment he implanted me, he never had to worry about being alone again.

I think this is one of the most interesting fics I’ll ever write. I hope someday I can tempt people who might not otherwise be interested in the game/characters to read it anyway :) It’s on the backburner while I work on stuff I’m already posting, but I think about it often and go to add passages or fiddle with it still.

 Tag list even though i’m late late late: @kita-lavellan | @mrstethras | @silvanils | @this-basic-mage | @lesbianarcana | @queerspacepunk | @dragongeek1 | @sakkayaroze | @followingthewolf | @bloodiedfeetonhallowedground 

[pushesbuttons-blog]

Creedy Rambles-

So this is just gonna be a new thing I do on occasion when I can’t focus on drafts or messages, where I’m going to talk about stuff related to TSP, fandoms, tumblr and roleplaying in general. I’ll be tagging these specifically, and they’ll all be under a read more. So if you don’t want to see them, just blacklist the tag.

REGARDING OC’s:

THIS IS NOT MEANT TO OFFEND ANYONE OR THEIR CHARACTER, SIMPLY IT IS TO HELP PEOPLE WHO WANT TO IMPROVE AND EDUCATE PEOPLE ON WHAT IS ORIGINAL IN A CHARACTER AND WHAT ISN’T- BASED OFF OF HOW MANY OTHER PEOPLE DO IT.

Before I start in I’ll quickly identify what an OC is-

OC or Original Character, is a person or entity developed entirely with the creative mind of one person and does not stem from an existing copyright/franchise.

Essentially- it is a being that you made up. You made up their personality, backstory, appearance- all of it. Yes, you probably got inspiration from other places or characters, but it is still your own character. They can be set in a specific game/movie/book or any franchise, or you can make up your own world for them.

Now unfortunately on Tumblr, Oc’s face A LOT of criticism and backlash. Not necessarily because Oc’s are bad.. but because of the stereotype that they’re bad.

And even worse, this stereotype is often very true, in the sense that- people do NOT understand how to make a character.

People make a character, but its not really original. Because it conforms to ALL the stereotypes that other people’s OC’s have. Thus negating its originality in the first-place. Making it ironically an UNoriginal character.

And it kills me, because those Oc’s ruin it for the GOOD Oc’s out there.

I’ve been on Tumblr for only around 2-ish years and I’ve seen HUNDREDS of Oc’s. Some AMAZING and others horrid.

And It hurts me that the good Oc’s aren’t given a chance because of the negative association with stereotypical ‘bad’ oc’s.

Now I bet you’re asking- ‘Creedy, what are some of the things people do that make BAD Oc’s? Surely it can’t be that bad, that people on tumblr sometimes won’t even consider writing with them, right?’

Sadly, that is completely correct.

Disclaimer: Sometimes people won’t write with your OC simply because they don’t like them, and thats THEIR problem. Not yours.

So let me give a quick rundown and reasoning as to what people do that give Oc’s (GENERALLY) a bad name-

1. Mary Sue / Gary Stu

Okay, we’ve all heard these ones. But if you haven’t- A Mary Sue is basically a stereotypical OC with NO FLAWS. She’s often described as ‘smart, pretty, honest, kind, and amazing at everything she does’.. okay. 

That is already a HUGE red flag.

And even moreso- the only ‘flaw’ these characters will sometimes have is ‘clumsiness’ or some other attribute that doesn’t directly negatively effect the character’s personality, and is usually used as a trope to get that character closer to what they want... which is NOT what a flaw is supposed to do.

And if you think that your character is somehow unique in spite of all this- the FIRST instance of a Mary Sue goes as far back as 1973. In a Star Trek Fanfiction

Mary Sue stories—the adventures of the youngest and smartest ever person to graduate from the academy and ever get a commission at such a tender age. Usually characterized by unprecedented skill in everything from art to zoology, including karate and arm-wrestling. This character can also be found burrowing her way into the good graces/heart/mind of one of the Big Three [Kirk, Spock, and McCoy], if not all three at once. She saves the day by her wit and ability, and, if we are lucky, has the good grace to die at the end, being grieved by the entire ship.[7]

If your character matches this description, I’m sorry but- they are NOT original. If they’re good at basically everything with no flaws (especially at a younger than normal age) that character is by all means considered a Mary Sue. A Gary Stu just being the male counterpart.

How to fix this:

Now there IS a line in the sand. Your character can be young and good at things, nothing wrong with that. But make sure you add in some flaws such as- ‘unintelligent, rude, brash, liar, insecure, boring, cruel’. And make it so that there are things they hate in the world, and people that hate them. Mary Sues are also often depicted with everyone liking them, but as we all know that is simply not realistic. Create enemies or rivals for your character- or Hell, even someone they just plain dislike.

2. DO NOT COME UP WITH EVERYTHING ON THE SPOT

This^^^ Is important

Do not force your ideas. Do not try and just pull a character out of your ass, because then that character will be shit.

Take your time, no pressure.

You do not have to come up with their favorite color immediately- or even finish their backstory.

Somedays you may like an idea but later on you might realize it was stupid or unfitting, and vice versa.

Be patient and pace yourself

But lets say you’ve already kinda rushed it with your character, no biggie.

How to fix it:

Again, take your time. Don’t immediately go deleting everything you dislike about your character. Put it on the backburner and give it time to boil, slowly but surely- it will come to you.

3. Do not LIST things.

Unfortunately I’m also guilty of this one, as is most Tumblr rpers.

When you make an about page for your character- listing the name, age, birth. Thats okay. But why do it that way when you can show off your writing skills a bit?

And don’t make giant random pointless lists of likes and dislikes. Place them in relevant categories.

How to fix it:

Instead of doing the following:

Likes: Swords, rock, fighting, snow.

Do this:

Aya lives outcast in the snowy tundra nearly 20 miles from the nearest city, but it suits her just fine. The harsh snow is actually quite comforting and she can’t imagine living anywhere else. Additionally she has a fiery passion for sword-play, and practices as often as she can in her own private training room. The adrenaline of fighting keeps her fit and on her toes, and it drives her to do the best she possibly can each day. Aya also has a great taste in music, hard rock to be specific. She enjoys rocking out to AC/DC while battling her training dummy.

Is it a bit long and drawn out? Maybe, but it’ll give that person a better idea on how you write and how descriptive you are. Its not a cookie-cutter sort of process anymore.

4. No Eye-bleeding color schemes.

Dear sweet baby Jesus.

Look, sometimes it works. But a good 99.9% of the time- using every color of the rainbow WILL NOT WORK.

When you do that, it looks like someone crushed the color out of every sharpie that exists and dumped it on your character.

Its not pretty or cute or creative, because everyone has done it and it hurts to look at. Especially if you choose NEON OVER BLACK. You will burn someone’s eyes out, don’t do that.

Here is a basic read-up on Color Theory and some beautiful Color Palettes, to give you an idea.

How to fix it:

Now look, rainbow coloring in itself isn’t bad. But instead of just choosing the brightest colors you can find. Go to google and search for a color palette and use that. A good chunk of canon characters generally have a set of 5-6 colors in the same moodset that they stick to.

Also tacking on this: generally make your character’s clothing simple. Don’t add too many crazy patterns or random hats and glasses and wings and tails just.. unless you can justify it in their backstory properly- stick to a standard set of clothing and then maybe tack on a maximum of 3 accessories. A bracelet, a fancy hairtie and glasses.. okay done! Simple but cute!

5. Do not base that character entirely on a character that already exists (especially if you intend them to be in the same fandom)

It does not take skill or originality to take Elmo and turn him blue and then call him ‘Omle’

That is not an ‘original’ character and its not ‘inspired’ off of Elmo- yet I see people do this all the time.

Now look, this one is hit or miss. Sometimes it works and its cool, but most of the time it doesn’t. Especially if they’re in the same franchise.

Inspiration =/= Copying

How to fix it:

Unfortunately if you’ve done this you may need to make drastic changes with your character. But that doesn’t mean you HAVE to take away everything, you can just add new stuff. A change of clothes, skin color, eye color, maybe body shape, swap out some personality traits and boom- you’ve already got something more original than what you’ve started with!

6. Simple, my God.. simple

Meet Simplicity, no- they’re not an OC. But they’re gonna be your new best friend.

Simplicity is what you need. No over amount of accessories, powers, positive OR negative personality traits. Just a nice SIMPLE amount.

How to fix this:

Again if you’re not comfortable putting your character through drastic changes. Then this won’t be for you. Try and limit yourself with a set number of general stuff about your character. Like top five positive traits, and top five negative traits. Okay-

Compassionate, Goofy, Hilarious, Bubbly, Kind

Airheaded, nervous, panicky, oblivious, naive.

Notice how all of these traits generally have something in common or similar to the ones next to them? That is what a character is supposed to be like. Different enough to be their own thing, but similar enough to still ‘blend’ with that character. They OVERLAP each other.

7. I...I’m not sure what to call this one?

But basically- if your character is lets say.. ‘the sonic oc’. Make sure they look as though they’re from the sonic universe, but also doesn’t look too similar to a character already in that universe.

ALSO DO NOT USE BASES.

Any art you do will be SO MUCH BETTER and IMPROVE YOU SO MUCH MORE than ANY base you use.

Bases are actually proven to make your art skills WORSE.

Here is a POSE sight used to help artists draw, this is better to use.

Disclaimer: Using bases as references is fine. Do not copy it pose-per-pose. But maybe you just want to get a general idea of that character so you look at a base- thats fine. But do not copy it.

How to fix it:

Again you may need to redesign your character if this is the case.

Can’t draw? Thats alright, a detailed description can generally be enough for an OC. And even if you feel like your art sucks, practice makes perfect. I promise you.

8. Fit the personality with the appearance.

A character in a dark hood with circles under his eyes that look soul-crushing probably won’t have the personality of a six year old girl.

When you make a character who has a sad or depressive general mood or personality, match that with colors and clothing articles. Like blue or fluffy sweaters.

Think of the emotions in Pixar’s Inside Out. Their appearance directly correlates to their personality and the emotion they give off. That is what makes them good characters.

How to fix it:

Again, a redesign might be in order.

9. Long V.s Short Backstories

Alright so theres a huge doublestandard on Tumblr that I CANNOT STAND.

On one hand- people reprimand you if your backstory is too short. Alright, fair enough. Its their life story, I’m supposed to make it long and specific right?

WRONG!!!!!!

Because then people will get lazy and not even bother to read your character’s backstory because apparently 7 pages is ‘too much’.

How to fix this:

So, what do?

You make both.

You make a small summary of your character with something like ‘Very brief history’ and then you expand upon it under the summary with a title like ‘detailed/specific history.’ At least that way people can’t piss on you for your story being too short or too long.

10. The stereotypical ‘Tragic backstory’

Okay. I’m guilt of this. I’m SEVERELY guilty of this.

However, a tragic backstory isn’t bad.. as long as there is reason behind it.

When you have a character- having sad or horrible things happen in their life is good. Otherwise they’d just be another Mary Sue. But you don’t want to completely make your character miserable unless they call for it.

Lets say your character is blind- it makes sense that they could’ve had a tragic accident that blinded them.

But if your character was bruised or beaten for...seemingly no reason and it had no effect on them personality wise.. why is it there? What was the point in throwing it into their story?

A smiley, bubbly character who is constantly happy and has nothing wrong with them is not going to have ‘Macbeth’ as their backstory. And vice versa.

How to fix this:

Add happier or brighter moments in their life, intervals where things weren’t so bad. Role models, hobbies and when they learned them. Things like that.

On the other end (if they’re too happy) Add some sad parts. Struggles they’ve had, confrontations they won’t forget etc. etc.

11. Research.

I’m not saying you have to write a book report, but looking up on google about real-world locations, how certain jobs and processes (such as being arrested, giving birth, whatever is relevant to the character/your thread) will do you some good in an rp. And you might learn something!

And this is not meant to offend anyone.

Alright. Now I want to say that yeah- you can get away with some of this stuff. I list things, sometimes my characters are over the top, or their color scheme isn’t great. And people still think the character is good.

But it IS highlighting the things literally EVERYONE ELSE HAS DONE, therefore making these tropes unoriginal and making your character unoriginal. This is meant to give tips on how to make your character more original.

Do you have to change it if you don’t want to? No.

Is your character so awful it’ll make me vomit if you don’t follow these rules? No.

But if you want to improve upon your creativity, these steps will do nothing but HELP you in the long run. I promise!

[sassenach-swiftie]

An Introduction and a preview of what I’m working on

Hi Outlander fandom.  My name’s Mandy and I’ve been creeping around reading some amazing fanfic on here and I’ve been inspired to write my own eventhough I probably havent written fan fiction in 15 years.  I was inspired by Taylor Swift’s album lover and I’m trying to craft a story that weaves lyrics from the album into a modern AU.  I’ve actually mapped out an arc for prequels with Reputation and 1989 as well (though that would have to be a Claire/Frank story 😬). Maybe I’ll tackle Folklore someday but that will be a unique challenge.  Anyway.  If youre still reading this, I was inspired to start writing chapter 7 today and here’s a small excerpt.  I’d love any feedback from the fandom or just a welcome.  I honestly have been such a lurker I feel like an outsider. I have no idea when I’ll be ready to “premiere” my fic. I wrote chapter 7 today and will probably start Chapter 1 tomorrow. It might be bad timing as I am a teacher and I start school tomorrow.  This will either get put on the backburner or become a catharsis during what I’m sure will prove to be a stressful school year. 

Chapter 7: Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince

“Sassenach, you ken what I’ve heard about American teenagers” he spoke softly, close to her ear so only she could hear him.  It made the fine hairs on her neck stand and gave her the sensation of something stirring deep within her.

“What American stories have you been hearing?” she giggled, trying to imagine the insight she was about to gain.

“I heard... that they go underneath these bleachers and make out.” he rasped, his voice feigning concern. 

“Shocking. What is this world coming to.” she gestured as if she were clutching an imaginary string of pearls.  Flirting with him came so effortlessly, she couldn’t bring herself to stop.

“See those bleachers o’er there, Sassenach?” she nodded as he gestured to the opposing team’s bleachers across the field.  “If I were an American teen, I would bring a lassie underneath those bleachers, much quieter you see than with these wee monkeys crawling about.”

“I see” she smirked and raised an eyebrow, daring herself to get lost in those blue eyes.

“You know, as a member of the faculty of this school, isna it your responsibility to check to see the teens aren’t doing anything… unsavory?”

“I suppose it might be part of my job description.” she was wondering where this flirty banter was headed.  She felt alive again for the first time in a month since she had seen him last. 

“I must admit I have to use the facilities, perhaps you should do that while I’m gone.” He was sure to catch her eye as she said it, blinking like an owl in an attempt to wink at her. 

He arose and announced to his family he had to use the toilet and he might leave from there and meet them at home.  The team was losing disastrously, the other team was full of brutes and the wildcats were left battered and bruising, the cheerleaders were a collection of depressed damsels, and the crowd was already starting to thin, so this came as no surprise to anyone as Jamie took his leave.

[tteastains]

the tension of opposites

Life pulls alternately back and forth, like a wrestling match. Love, he says, always wins.

  All my life, I have been a writer. I have always filled notebooks and journals with all kinds of stories. I have always been eager to share them with people. Writing has always been a deep-seated and essential part of my identity—the way I see myself, describe myself and place myself in the world.

All my life, I have had the idea that creative passions and careers are simply not worth the time or effort thrown at me nonstop. I have heard that creative fields are not “real jobs” and that making a living from creative passions is something that takes nothing more than privilege and a stroke of luck that is not afforded to most people.

I have now finished my first year of college, in which I took two vastly different writing classes that I thoroughly enjoyed. Having already completed two semesters of College English in high school, I’m technically “done” with it. And as my second semester wrapped up and I needed to make a schedule for next fall, I started to have this creeping feeling of something I wouldn’t quite call “dread,” but it was definitely building up to that.

I’ve always told myself (and frankly, have always been told) that writing is something I’ll always “have.” Something I can always “do,” after I find something “better.” After I find A Real Job.

But after this past year, I’ve realized something that makes my heart hurt. The minimal writing that I have been doing since finishing high school is already suffering. As an undergraduate student who did not work, I still didn’t have time to sit down and commit to writing. Because—brace yourself—writing does require discipline and commitment. Especially in my second semester, that discipline and commitment was almost exclusively applied to my schoolwork.   

So I’ve had a lot of days (and very late nights) that I just get lost in the thought of letting writing go, completely setting it aside and saving it for when I do have the time. Devote myself to this obscure concept of a “real job” that everyone talks down to me about all the time.

During the past year or two, I have taken a genuine interest in psychology. Now that’s what I call A Real Job, right? There are so many places you go with psych! So many well-paying options! All I have to do is pursue a career in psychology, land a decent job, and then all the sudden I’ll have the time and funds to commit myself to writing again! Maybe I can even write a book about psychology!

That’s not how it works. And it’s so not the point.

I am tired. I’m tired of creative people being forced to stifle their creativity and their passions because they are told that they don’t count. I’m tired of hearing the same story over and over of artists pursuing a degree in a field that they hate because they have been taught that that’s just what they have to do to survive. I’m tired of the people who do honor their creativity being stepped on by others for doing so.

Now, I understand that doing sitting at my desk alternating between scribbling in a notebook and tapping furiously at a keyboard is not a valid career option in the eyes of many. I understand that maybe it’s not a valid career option, period.

What I want to know is what the point of life is if all you’re doing is setting your passions aside for the promise of money.

The prospect of starving to death or being stuck in one miserable place (physical or metaphorical) is the only thing that has ever stopped me from completely diving into writing with everything I have. Toward the end of last semester in my writing class, we were given an assignment that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about. It was a question that we had to respond to in something like 200 words.

What would we do with our lives if there was a universal basement income and no one had to work anymore? This was part of a whole discussion we’d been having about our future of work becoming overrun with technology to the point of there being no work for human beings.

It seemed like a lot of people in my class were stumped or hadn’t really thought about it that much. I don’t know that for sure because I never saw what they wrote or spoke to anyone about it, but I understand why they might have had trouble. It was a Writing for STEM class, so it’s safe to assume that a lot of the people around me were set on a very smart-sounding and impressive career that they had always wanted to pursue. Chemical engineering, professional hacking, things like that. Various jobs that people don’t really think about being taken over by robots someday very soon.

It didn’t take me very long at all to finish my assignment because it was a question I had already thought about extensively. If I didn’t have to worry about surviving anymore, I would create a space for myself that I could write until my fingers fell off and my eyes fell out. When I ran out of ideas or hit a slump, I’d keep going to school and learn about all the other things that interest me. I’d take a breath and commit to reading more.

The most refreshing part about that whole discussion was that the professor brought up the topic of music that had been composed by robots and screenplays written by computers. Most of the class agreed (only after the professor said it more than once) that humans in creative fields like music and writing and painting technically can be replaced by machines, sure. But when you listen to that music, or look at that drawing, or watch that screenplay being acted out… it’s just not right. “It’s just very obvious that it was not written by a human being.” After that, we had a brief discussion about how screwed up the publishing process is for writing a book after someone made a comment along the lines of, “if you’re a good writer, you sell a million books, you’re set for life.” The professor and I both cringed because frankly, I wish that were true.

But anyway. For some reason, the reflex of so many people is to stamp out any spark of creativity and spit on people who study the arts. They don’t take into account that discouraging artists will soon make movies, books, music, and interesting clothing disappear. 

They don’t take into account how much damage that does to someone, to be told constantly to find something because what they love doesn’t count.

College has brought me many things, not all positive, but I’m grateful for most all of them. Recently, I was granted the choice between statistics and creative writing.

Since go, I’ve understood college in perhaps the most incorrect way possible. I had the idea in my head that picking up classes because they sounded neat was somehow wrong. I also know that an understanding of statistics is a pretty useful tool for most things. Those two things were all it took for me to tell myself, “yeah, math sucks but this is useful and it’s better to just get it over with.”

I didn’t know at that time that a creative writing class was an alternative until a third party stepped in and laid my choices in front of me and started asking me questions that I already knew I was failing to ask myself.

And the fact is that knowledge of statistics is useful and often even required. Another fact, however, is that there is not a shortage of opportunities to pursue a statistics course. I’m not running short on time, either.

Dropping statistics in exchange for a second creative writing course was not a hard choice. In fact, it was kind of terrifyingly easy. When it comes to choosing between writing and something else, writing is my first choice most of the time. However, since about my sophomore year of high school, I’ve had to set it aside and focus on other things, and I guess you could say that my brain is hardwired that way now. Meaning, I tend to just assume that writing needs to go on the backburner until “later.”

Coming into summer and reflecting on the things I’ve learned over the past two semesters has lead me onto a weird thought train. 

I’ve learned that it’s not okay to leave the things I love on the back burner or in the margins of my life. That’s why I’m so excited about the classes I’m taking in the fall, and yet I’m still harboring a weird feeling, something that almost feels like guilt.

 Because like I said, my brain feels hard-wired into thinking that writing is something that needs to wait. It brings me back to the ideas about “real jobs” that I’ve been taught forever, that have always scared me so much for so many reasons.

Maybe writing isn’t a real job. Maybe I’ll take this next creative writing course and love it, and find the time and motivation to finish the YA novel I’ve been working on for three years. Maybe after that, I’ll be satisfied and never want to write another thing ever again.

That last one may be very unlikely, but I won’t know for certain until I get there. Nothing is certain, especially not when it comes to things like this.

I don’t want to spend my life stifling my creativity and my passions for the sake of not facing criticism or for the sake of money or because I’ve convinced myself that it will make my life easier. 

I will start my second year of college in the fall, and I will be starting it with a new mindset. I don’t want to deny myself the enjoyment of pursuing courses that seem cool just because I won’t “use” them.

I had to take a Geometry and Trigonometry (twice!) in high school and I suffered all the way through. It’s safe to assume I won’t be using those in my everyday life. So, forgive me if I’ve realized that now’s the time to take a few classes that I enjoy, even if I won’t “use” them or don’t “need” them. Because I no longer believe that those two things are or need to be mutually exclusive.

I’m not ready to be “done” with writing or English classes, and that’s something that I have always known but I had to be pushed toward realizing. Especially realizing that it’s okay, and that if I don’t go for it now, I will probably grow to resent myself at some point down the line. 

Because, of course: in the end, love always wins.

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