#and i love what we do see but i wish so much there has been another montage of emails after too

[straylightdream]

sweet monday afternoons

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: yoon jeonghan x afb.reader

Being with him was easy, and sharing a love of food and baking was the perfect match.

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞(𝐬): friends to lovers, coworkers to lovers, romance, fluff, smut

𝐚𝐮(𝐬): nonidol, linecook! jeonghan, waitress/baker!reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 9.1k

𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: cussing, angst kinda?, the mc has a hard time communicating sometimes

𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: unprotected sex, cumplay, creampie, soft dom jeonghan, big dick jeonghan, pussy stretching, size kink, praise kink, the reader has bigger boobs and jeonghan is obsessed, breeding kink, dirty talk, hand job, fingering, oral (both rec), anal play, use of a buttplug, cockwarming, spanking, nicknames: bunny, pretty, pretty girl, baby, sweet cheeks, princess good girl (hers) baby, hannie (his)

𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: 18+ nsfw

𝐚𝐧: happy early valentines everyone. Thank you so much @gyuhao5 for beta reading for me.

🎧: intentions - starfall | soft spot - keshi | casual - chappell roan | talk to me - starfall

𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬.

Growing up you used to spend hours in the kitchen with your grandmother baking. Some of your fondest memories were spent in her kitchen. You always had this dream of going to culinary school to learn more about the art of baking. Your little dream came crashing down when you truly realized how expensive it was going to be. There was no way your parents could afford to send you to culinary school. Especially after your father lost his job.

Your father being laid off drastically changed your life. What started as day trips to see your grandmother soon changed when you and your parents had to move back in with her.

At the age of seventeen you got a job juggling school and working as much as physically possible. At the age of nineteen you saved up enough to move in with your best friend Soonyoung.

Even though culinary school wasn’t in your cards that didn’t detour your love of all things food and baking. Since moving out you have juggled working in the food industry in one way or another. You’ve been a barista, you have been a host and now your two most recent jobs consist of being a waitress at a restaurant called Sucré and on Sundays working at a little local bakery helping out the owner in the early hours of the morning making all her baked goods for the day.

Friday nights at the restaurant are always hell. It tends to be nonstop and the only good part about it is the money you make. It’s break time and sitting in the back alley Soonyoung is laying on the sidewalk complaining about two different tables in his section.

“Do you think if I just left Seungcheol would notice?” Soonyoung groans.

“I’m pretty sure our boss would notice.” Your roommate is always being dramatic in one way or another.

The back door opens and Jeonghan, one of the line cooks walks out. You’ve been working with him for over a year and you wish you could say your crush on him has gone away but it truly hasn’t. In the more recent months you’ve actually become friends with him.

“I hate Fridays.” He groans sitting on the curb next to you. He bumps your knee with his. Over the last two months Jeonghan and you have been flirting quite a bit.

“Don’t we all?” Soonyoung wines.

“How much longer until this night is over?” If you have to deal with one more bitchy customer you might scream.

“Probably three hours,” Jeonghan sighs looking at you.

Glancing at his watch, Soonyoung sits up. “I don’t wanna go back.” Standing up he holds his hand out for you, helping you stand up.

“Joshua and I were talking about going to Wonwoo’s bar he works at after work to get some beers. Would you like to join?” You’ve hung out with Jeonghan after work before with some friends.

“I feel like I need to get drunk after this shift,” Soonyoung chimes in.

“That will take all of one and a half beers to get you there.” Your best friend is the textbook definition of a light weight.

“Is that a yes?” Jeonghan asked.

“Yeah I’m down.” You don’t want to miss an opportunity to hang out with Jeonghan.

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Sometimes the best time to go to the bar at midnight is after working a shitty shift at a fancy restaurant. 42nds is a bar that Wonwoo a mutual friend with a lot of the boys works at as a bartender. The drinks are cheap here and everyone always has a great time.

The moment you arrive at the bar Soonyoung ordered himself a beer, and sets his sight on a pretty girl playing pool. Joshua follows him noticing she has a friend with her.

Standing at the bar with Jeonghan you each order a beer. “Shitty night at work?” Wonwoo asked as he cleans some glasses.

“That’s an understatement,” Jeonghan sighs.

“You know this is why I told Seungcheol I didn’t want to work there.” Seungcheol has been trying to get Wonwoo to bartend at Sucré for months.

“You make good money here right?” Jeonghan and Wonwoo have been friends for years as they went to college together.

“Yeah the money is good. I feel like I would probably make more where you guys are, but then again I couldn’t do freelance photography if I worked there.” Wonwoo says.

Before Jeonghan can respond, Wonwoo gets waved down by his manager.

Jeonghan leans again at the bar and takes a drink of his beer. “Can I ask you a question?” Jeonghan asked.

“Sure.”

“Are you and Soonyoung together?” He asked so casually before taking a sip of his beer.

Trying your hardest not to let out a laugh you glance over at your roommate who is in the middle of flirting with a girl over at the pool table. “No we’re not together.”

“Okay I just wanted to know.”

Taking a sip of your beer you raise your eyebrow at him. “Why do you ask?”

A smile plays across his lips, “Well I wanted to make sure you weren’t together before I asked if you wanted to come over to my place tonight?” The room suddenly seems like it’s spinning at the mention of Jeonghan wanting you to come over.

“Like to have sex?” The moment the words leave your mouth you instantly feel embarrassed. Clearly that’s what he wants and you aren’t sure why you’re being so awkward.

“If you don’t want to, it's totally cool. I just thought I would shoot my shot.” You've seen Jeonghan flirt with other people before and you’ve seen him pull his fair share of women. You never thought he had any interest in you.

“I didn’t know you liked me like that.”

“I would have made a move earlier, but I thought Soonyoung was your boyfriend.” Leave it to Soonyoung to cock block you without even trying.

“Definitely not my boyfriend.” In all the years you’ve known Soonyoung you’ve never even had a crush on him. He’s always just been your best friend.

“Well if you’re still interested at the end of the night maybe you could come over to my apartment.”

“Okay.”

The rest of your time is spent hanging out at the pool table. Soonyoung and Joshua are each flirting with a girl and Jeonghan is whooping everyone's ass at pool. When it’s your turn Jeonghan stands next to you coaching you. There is something so sexy about how confident he is at this. If you weren’t already looking forward to going home with him you definitely are now.

Bending over the table, Jeonghan's hand is on your lower back. “You’re doing so good,” he says loud enough for only you to hear.

“You’re very charming Yoon Jeonghan.”

“Only when there is a pretty girl involved.”

As the night comes to a close Jeonghan is at the bar talking to Wonwoo right as you get up.

“Maybe we should call a cab instead of walking the short distance home,” your roommate says.

“Soonyoung I’m going to go to Jeonghan’s house.” Your voice is low, barely above a whisper.

Soonyoung’s eyes go wide as he processes what you just said. “Are you going to fuck Jeonghan?”

“Soonyoung!”

“Oh my god, well have fun getting laid,” he pats you on the back giving you a huge smile. He takes off running towards Joshua asking him to share a cab.

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Walking into Jeonghan's small apartment you glance around as he locks the door. It’s an open concept with a kitchen in the corner and three doors in a small hallway.

“Do you have a roommate?”

“No, I live alone. It’s a little one-bedroom.” Stepping out of your shoes, you stare at Jeonghan for a moment. Placing his hand under your chin he tilts your head up. “You’re so pretty,” slowly he leans towards you. His nose is presses up against yours and your lips are almost touching.

“Can I kiss you?”

“I thought you asked me to come over to have sex? Wouldn’t that involve kissing?”

A smile tugs at his lips, “So you want to have sex with me?”

“Yoon Jeonghan I want you to fuck me.”

Without another word he crashes his lips into yours. Your first kiss is everything you had hoped it was going to be. Your stomach feels like it’s filled with butterflies as your lips move together. Pulling back from you his hair falls into his face. Without even thinking you reach up brushing it away.

“Since the moment I started working at Sucré I have wanted to get to know you.” His voice is low.

“Why is that?” Your hand rests on his cheek guiding his face closer to yours again.

“You’re beautiful and there is something about you I’m drawn to.”

“Well I’m all yours.” You step back from him. “You know I have seen you flirt with women at bars and I have always wondered what this would be like.”

He pulls off his white shirt leaving him in his black work pants. Tossing the shirt on the floor he walks closer to you again. “You know I thought you and Soonyoung were either dating or hooking up. I can’t lie, I have been jealous of him for months.”

“I’m not interested in Soonyoung. I’m only interested in you.” You reach out, poking his chest.

“I think it’s time to start losing some clothes.”

Slowly you pull off your shirt. Jeonghan unbuckles his belt and unbuttoned his pants. He’s left standing there in his tight boxer-briefs. His body is absolutely mouth watering. Reaching for the button on your jeans you can even unbutton them before Jeonghan grabs yours, stopping you. “Let me.”

He dropped down to his knees in front of you. This is a sight you never thought you would see. Unbuttoning your jeans, sliding them down your thighs. Stepping out of your jeans you look down to see Jeonghan staring up at you with lust filled eyes.

“Can you take your bra off for me?” He’s sitting back on his hunches. He reaches behind your unclasp your bra. Your heavy breasts are on display. You want to reach up and cover your chest, but you know you shouldn’t.

“It takes everything in me not to stare at your boobs all the time.” He captures his bottom lip between his teeth. Hooking his fingers into your thong he slides them down your legs.

Standing in front of him completely bare he’s staring at you like you’re the only person in the world. You wish you would have known this was going to happen. You would have shaved and worn cute matching lingerie. “I didn’t plan for this to happen. I’m not really prepared.”

Leaning forward he presses a kiss to the top of your pussy.

“I think you look perfect.”

“I would have shaved or something,” you ramble a little feeling embarrassed.

“Guys don’t actually care about that. No matter how you look. I’m going to like you.” If you weren’t wet before you definitely are now.

His hand gently rub your thigh with one hand while the other starts rubbing your wet core. His fingers ran up and down your wet slit.

“You’re already so wet.” He smiles up at you. “Is this all because of me?”

Silently, you nod.

“Can you turn around and hold on to the couch for me?”

“Yes.”

Bent over the back of the couch you’re caught off guard when he knocks your legs further apart. His lips leave a trail from between your shoulder blades down to your wet core. He stopped biting to leave love bites on the flesh of your butt cheeks.

“I hope this isn’t a one time thing. I have been dying to get you like this for a long time.”

Dropping to his knees behind you, his face is level with your wet pussy. His fingers part your lower lips slowly and he starts licking your sensitive clit. One of his long fingers slowly starts thrusting into you. “You’re so tight,” he moans against your pussy. Your fingers grip the couch cushion below you at the feeling as he adds another finger. “I need to stretch you out for me.” Hooking his fingers he’s brushing the perfect spot inside of you that has you seeing stars. The way he’s sucking on your clit and thrusting his fingers in and out if you can’t help but moan his name.

“Fuck-“ your legs feel like they’re about to buckle.

“Come on pretty girl. Are you going to come on my face?”

“Please- close-“ you can’t help but whimper. Incoherent words seem to leave your mouth.

“Can you take another finger?”

“Yes-“ The moment he stretches you open with a third finger you moan his name loudly. Your orgasm hits you like a ton of bricks. Your head falls forward resting on the couch cushion. Jeonghan slowly licks your clit as you ride out your high.

Pulling away from you he gives your ass an unexpected smack earning a moan from you. “Fuck you’re good at that.” You slowly pushed yourself up. Turning around you lean back against the couch. Your eyes are locked on his as his thumb wipes away your release from his bottom lip. Taking his thumb into mouth he sucks your release off his skin.

“You taste so sweet.”

“Let’s move to the bedroom,” he reaches his hand out. He leads you off to his bedroom. “Can you lay on the bed?” He asked releasing your hand.

“Yes.”

“I have a few questions before we continue.” Walking over you lay down in the middle of the bed. He stands at the top of the bed. “Are you on birth control?” He catches you off guard when he removes his boxers and you’re greeted by the sight of his very large cock. This was definitely the largest you’ve ever seen in person. You’re speechless at the sight of him.

“Hey pretty girl can you answer me?”

Blinking a few times you glance up at him feeling embarrassed he literally left you speechless at the sight of his naked body. “I have an IUD.”

“Do you want me to wear a condom?” He pushes his finger through his dark hair. Walking over to the nightstand he pulls out a bottle of lube and tossed it on the bed next to you.

“I’ve never had sex without one.” None of your past partners have asked you to go bare. The idea of him taking you raw with his huge cock makes you wet all over again.

“I don’t mind wearing a condom. It’s fully up to you. I’m clean. I got tested two months ago and haven’t slept with anyone since. I’m giving you the option if you want me to go raw.”

“You don’t have to wear a condom.” There is something thrilling about the idea of him not wearing anything as he enters you.

He puts his knee on the bed and moves towards you. Sitting back on his hunches between your legs. “My final question,” he gently parts your thighs.

“Yes?”

“Where do you want me to come?”

“Am I allowed to ask you to finish inside me?” You can’t get the thought of him filling you to the brim out of your mind.

“Absolutely.”

“Please come inside.” You’ve read countless romance novels about men with breeding kinks who are obsessed with finishing inside someone and you’re curious what Jeonghan is like when it comes to finishing inside you. “Do you have a breeding kink or do you just like creampies?” It’s a bold question but you are genuinely curious.

Sitting on his hunches between your legs. Reaching over he clicks open the bottle of lube coating his large cock with a generous amount of it. He runs his length through your folds collecting your release. His lust blown eyes are locked on you. “Are you going to be turned off if I have breeding kink?” He taps his rose colored head against your clit. A loud moan passes your lips. He pours more lube in your wet core and takes his time massaging your lower lips and your entrance to wet core with it.

“No, I think I want you to have one.”

“Do you want me to talk dirty to you while I fill you to the brim for the first time ever with my cum?”

You take a shaky deep breath, “please.”

Slowly he pushes into you inch by inch. Giving you time to adjust to the sheer size of him. “Anything for you princess.”

“Fuck you’re big-“ you moan closing your eyes. It’s gonna take a little bit to get used to the feeling of him stretching you.

“You’re doing so good,” he stills completely as he bottoms out. His hand rubs your side helping to relax you. Your eyes are locked on his as you take slow deep breaths trying to relax. He presses a gentle kiss to your knee. “If you need to stop. We don’t have to continue.”

“I want you to fuck me. I just need a moment. You’re just- you’re just fucking big.” He has you stuttering over your words.

A smile tugs at his lips. “You sure know how to stroke a guys ego.”

Rolling your eyes, “I can’t be the only one who has told you your dick is huge.”

“I’ve heard it before, but it’s nice hearing you say it.”

Pushing yourself up on your hands you look down at where you’re connected. The sight of him stretching your tight pussy turns you on even more.

“You can move. Could you go slow?”

“Absolutely.” He leans forward pressing his lips to yours. “Next time I’m going to have you ride me so I can suck on your nipples and play with your huge boobs.”

“Are you a boob guy Jeonghan?”

“I’m obsessed with your boobs.”

“Does that mean yes?”

“You’re finding out about all my kinks tonight.” He pulls his hips back, removing himself almost fully from you. “Now lay down baby.” Silently you follow his command.

His hips roll into yours at a steady but slow pace. He stays in the same position sitting on his calves. After a few minutes he hooks one of your legs over his arm for a better position. The room is filled with the echoing sounds of moans, heavy breathing and wet sounds from a mix of your release and lube.

“Can you touch my clit?” It's rare you can come without clit stimulation. He groans as his hand moves to your core. His thumb makes rough circles on your clit. “Jeong-“ your body feels tense as you get closer and closer to the edge.

“Can you cum for me?” He drops your leg that he’s holding. His thumb continues to work on your clit. Reaching forward he takes your breast in his hand. Pinching your nipple.

“Oh god-“ you cry as you cum. Your walls spasm around his huge length. “Please cum inside me-“ you beg.

“I’m gonna fill you up,” he snaps his hips into yours at a quicker pace. His hips stutter as he paints your wall white. He moans your name like a prayer. Leaning forward he basically collapsed on your soft body.

Closing your eyes you slowly come down from your high. Gently your hand strokes his back as his breathing is heavy.

“Fuck-“ he groans. “I don’t think I have ever cummed that hard in my life.”

“You almost made me cry, I came so hard.”

He leaves a trail of wet kisses across the top of your breast.

“I might truly be obsessed with your boobs,” he laughs, slowly rolling off you.

“You can play with them anytime you want.”

A smile is plastered across his lips. “Don’t threaten me with a good time.”

Crawling out of bed he runs off to the bathroom and comes back with a wet washcloth to wipe away his cum that is slowly dripping out of you.

Laying in his bed staring at the ceiling, Jeonghan is playing with your hair. Things feel so comfortable between you. This doesn’t feel like a random hook up.

“Are you able to get breakfast together Sunday?”

Glancing up at him he looks so gentle. “I can't, I have to work at the bakery. I’m there from five in the morning to noon.”

“You work at a bakery?”

“Yeah I work a little bakery called Sweet Kisses. I just work there on Sunday mornings helping bake.”

“I didn’t know you bake.”

“I don’t get to do it very often so not a lot of people know.” Looking over at him you smile.

“I make a mean chocolate chip cookie.” He says staring at the ceiling with a gentle smile on his lips.

“Will you make them for me one day?”

“Absolutely.”

There’s a moment of silence before it clicks what he asked. “Did you just ask if I wanted to go on a date?”

A smile spread across his lips. “I was trying to.”

“I can’t get breakfast Sunday but I’m free the rest of the day.”

“Won’t you be tired?” He bops your nose earning a smile from you.

“I can drink some coffee and it will be worth being tired if I get to go out with you.”

“Can I pick you up from work Sunday from the bakery?” Looking up at him you lean up and press your lips to his.

“Absolutely.”

“Should I head home now?” You haven’t had casual sex in a while and you weren’t sure if he wanted you to stay or go.

“Why would you leave?”

Looking away from him you feel embarrassed. “Maybe you wanted to get some sleep and not worry about me.”

“I absolutely don’t want you to leave. I was hoping we could cuddle, and maybe have some cuddly morning sex, before I take you home. Since we both have work tomorrow.” He glanced over at his alarm clock to see its two in morning. “I guess technically we work tonight.” Your body feels warm at his sweet statement.

“I like your idea.”

He leans down pressing his lips to your. Smiling he pulls back from you. “I’m so glad I made a move on you finally.”

Walking into your apartment you find Soonyoung sitting on the couch watching tv. The moment he sees you a huge smile plays across his face.

“Well well well look who is home from her little sex romp.”

A heavy sigh passes your lips as you roll your eyes. “Soonyoung-“

“Was the sex good?” Soonyoung stands up. Your best friend loves gossiping and he absolutely wants to hear all the details about your night with Jeonghan.

“Soonyoung-“

“Listen, my best friend finally got laid by her crush. You can’t blame me for wanting to know the dirty details about how Jeonghan is in bed.”

Rolling your eyes you know he’s not going to let up, “let’s just say he’s so big I’m shocked I’m walking.”

Soonyoung’s eyes about bulge out of his head. “Jeonghan is packing?” He practically yells.

“That’s all the details you’re getting.”

“Oh my god,” Soonyoung follows you down the hall towards your bedroom. “I would have never guessed he has a huge dick.”

Not even bothering to respond anymore, you shut your bedroom door practically in Soonyoung's face. “Hey,” he yells knocking on the door.

Ignoring him about picking up your room before you need to get ready for your shift tonight.

Getting dressed in your work clothes you go to where you have a small washer and drying area. Looking for your apron you spot Soonyoung’s work shirt.

“Are you really not going to give me the dirty details about how your dick appointment went?” He stands in the doorway watching.

“Stop asking me about Jeonghan’s huge cock, and start getting ready for work,” you toss his dress shirt at him. Now that your roommate knows about what unfolded between you and Jeonghan, there is no way he’s not going to tease you about it all the time.“We need to leave for work in thirty minutes.”

“Fine, have it your way, we won't talk about Jeonghan and his huge dick.” Soonyoung pouts.

-

Sundays are always rough for you. Saturday nights you always work until nine at night and then Sunday mornings you have to wake up at four in the morning for your shift at the bakery.

The sometimes exhausting Sundays are worth it. Especially when you absolutely love getting to spend the day baking. Juliette, the owner of the bakery loves letting you try our new recipes and fun new baked goods.

Walking out of the bakery you find Jeonghan leaning against the hood of his car holding a cup of coffee. You’ve been awake for hours and you’re quite tired but you don’t even care. You’re just excited to spend the day with Jeonghan.

“I have come bearing gifts,” he smiles, holding out an iced americano. “I asked Soonyoung what your coffee order is.”

“I see you enlisted the help of my best friend,” you smile while taking the coffee.

“What do you have planned for us?”

“I was thinking there is a museum in town I have been wanting to go to.”

“I would love to go to a museum.”

The drive from the bakery to the museum is about thirty minutes. The car ride is filled with small talk and Jeonghan singing along to the radio. Things between you feel natural.

Once arriving at the museum you instantly notice how happy he is. You quickly learn that he absolutely loves art.

Hand in hand Jeonghan led you through the museum. Occasionally releasing your hand to take photos of you and the art work. He takes you all around showing you all this favorite artist. You even snap a few candid photos of him. He doesn’t know it yet but you already like him so much.

Sitting in the garden section of the museum. You are surrounded by a sea of beautiful roses. Jeonghan is off to a little cafe grabbing something to eat.

Looking through your text you see a message from Soonyoung.

From Soonyoung: how is your date with massive dick Jeonghan?

From you: can we please not talk about his dick all the time?

From Soonyoung: where is the fun in that?

From you: The date is going a amazing.

From Soonyoung: this man really likes you. He literally asked me about your favorite foods and drinks. He basically had me give him a pop quiz on all things you.

From you: that’s good because I really like him.

From Soonyoung: is it safe to say you’re not coming home? Something tells me his massive dick is going to take you for a ride tonight.

From you: IDK?! Gotta go he’s coming back.

Jeonghan comes back over with a tray of food and drinks. Quickly you close your phone and put it back in your purse.

“I got us a few things to split.” He says sitting across from you. He got a delicious looking sandwich and a couple of pastries.

Sitting there splitting amazing pastries you can’t help but feel happy. “I like you Jeonghan.”

“I like you too, bunny.” His little nickname catches your attention. No one has ever called you that.

“Bunny?”

“You’re very cute like a bunny. So you’re my bunny.”

“I like that nickname.”

Leaning across the table he pushed your hair behind your ear. Leaning in closer to him you want to kiss him. His nose brushes against yours. “I want to keep seeing you like this.” Your lips touch for a searing kiss.

With your lips still brushing, “can you stay night with me again?”

“I would like that.”

“We’re both off tomorrow and if you’re free maybe we could just spend the day baking and hanging out.”

“I would really like that.”

Spending time with Jeonghan is easy. There is something about him you just click with immediately.

-

This time when you find yourself lying in Jeonghan’s bed he has you on your side. Your leg is lifted resting on his thigh. He’s pressed up behind you pushing into you at a slow but steady pace. One grips your heavy breast. Toying with your nipple between his fingers.

“You feel so deep,” you moan.

“Can you play with your clit for me?”

Breathlessly you nod. Your fingers move down to where you’re connected. Your clit is extra sensitive from the attention Jeonghan gave it when you arrived back at his place. He spent twenty long minutes eating you out. With ease he was able to get two orgasms out of you.

“Fuck this feels so good,” the sounds of his low raspy voice is intoxicating. “Do you like it when I go nice and slow?”

“Yes,” you’re trying your hardest not to sound desperate.

This felt so different then your first time together, this feels so much more intense.

Your orgasm hits you so hard you see stars. Your body feels like a live wire. He keeps his same slow deep pace helping you ride your high out.

His lips are attached to your shoulder leaving a trail of open mouth kisses in his wake.

Falling apart he moans your name. His last few thrusts are sloppy. There is a warm feeling washing over you. He paints your walls white with his sticky release.

Every so slowly he pulls out. Rolling onto your back you take slow deep breaths recovering from your intense orgasm.

Crawling out of bed he disappears for a moment before he returns with a warm cloth in hand. “Spread your legs for me bunny.”

Silently you follow his command. Gently he wipes away his release that is starting to drip out of you.

“You are so beautiful,” he pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your knee.

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Ever since your first night when you slept together two months ago Jeonghan has become a fixture in your life. You aren’t exactly sure what you are. Neither of you have discussed labels or exclusivity, but you aren’t interested in anyone other than him. The way he talks about whatever relationship you have he doesn’t make it sound like he’s sleeping with anyone else.

Sundays and Mondays are your favorite days now. Both of you are off from work so you tend to spend the night at Jeonghan’s on Sunday night and Monday you will spend the day together. Most Monday’s you spend the afternoon in the kitchen together.

Being with Jeonghan he’s really helped you embrace your love of baking. You’ve been able to see his love of food along the way.

Today's recipe is something you have never tried before. You saw an Instagram post about a miso brown sugar cookie and now you can’t stop thinking about it.

While you’re mixing together your dry ingredients Jeonghan is at the stove cooking something for you both to eat for lunch. He’s dressed in a pair of grey sweats that set low on his hips and nothing else. You’re dressed in an oversized shirt and a pair of tiny sleep shorts. Most Mondays you spend just in his apartment and you rarely change out of your pajamas. Whatever Jeonghan is cooking smells delicious.

Slowly you pour your wet ingredients into the bowl with your dry ingredients mixing them together.

“Hannie, can you preheat the oven please?”

“Ay at captain.” He steps back from the stove and turns on the oven.

While Jeonghan finishes making lunch you place all your cookie dough on the tray before placing it in the oven. Sitting at the kitchen table your eating the delicious soup that Jeonghan has made.

“You always look so happy when you’re baking,” he says.

“As a kid I always loved baking with my grandma. It just always puts me at ease.”

The timer goes off signaling your cookies are done. Hopping up you grab an oven mitt and pull out your golden cookies. Placing them on the cooling rack, you admire your work. Jeonghan comes up behind you. One hand rest on your hip while the other reaches out grabbing one of your fresh hot cookies.

He blows on the cookie before taking a bite. He moans the moment the cookie touches his tongue. “Bunny these taste amazing.”

“Are you just saying that?” You glance up at him.

“Absolutely not. These taste incredible. I will never lie to you when it comes to tasting what you make.”

“I feel like I should save some of these for Soonyoung. He used to get all my bake good before we started seeing each other.”

He places a kiss on your cheek before walking over to the table. “I like to think this is perk of being the one who has you coming so hard you almost cry.”

Rolling your eyes you shake your head. Sitting back down across from him.

“What’s the plan for today?” You asked.

“I was going to try and make this new dish for dinner. So maybe after a little while we can run to the grocery story.”

Days like these are your favorite. You don’t have anything lavish planned, you just spend the day enjoying each other's company. Walking around the grocery store Jeonghan pushes a little cart as you walk next to him. You love seeing the way he lights up when he sees new ingredients he’s been wanting to cook with.

“What’s your opinion on pineapple upside cookies?” You’re looking out the crate of fresh pineapples in the produce section.

“Like the cake?”

“Yes.”

“I’ve never had them in the form of a cookie.” Without saying anything you hand him a decent size pineapple you picked out. “Is this your way of trying to get my cum to taste sweet?” He laughs at his own immature statement.

“Are you a teenager now?”

“You can’t tell me you haven’t heard that myth before?”

“I have, and unless you behave I’m never tasting your cum ever again.”

His eyes go wide at your quick response. “You wouldn’t.”

“Don’t push me.” You laugh.

Walking for the street he holds the bag of groceries in one hand and your hand in the other. Things are so easy with Jeonghan and it makes you so happy. You haven’t been this happy with a man ever before.

Entering Jeonghan’s apartment you put away the groceries together. Sitting at the kitchen table looking up new recipes you want to try while Jeonghan is preparing things for dinner.

Standing up you walk over and wrap your arms around him hugging him from behind him.

“Yes bunny?”

“I just want to be close to you.” You love being able to hold him and cling to him.

He removes your hands and turns around so he’s facing you. Pinching your chin he tilts your head up towards him. Slowly he leans down pressing his lips to yours for a searing kiss. “Is my girl needy?”

“I’m always needy for you.”

“Are you hungry?” You know he’s asking if you’re literally hungry since he’s prepping dinner. But you can only think about him.

“I’m hungry for you.”

“You naughty girl.”

“I want you.”

“Go to my room, I'll be there in a minute.” Pulling away he smacks your ass before you can get two steps away from him.

Walking off to his room instead of waiting for him to undress you, you strip naked. Standing the foot of his bed you wait for him.

Opening the door he’s pleasantly surprised at the sight of you fully naked.

“Hands and knees bunny,” he taps your ass walking past you. “How do you feel about putting a little plug in this cute little ass of yours?” Without thinking you moan in response. Reaching into his nightstand he pulls out a small bottle of lube and the small rose gold plug he bought for you last month. This is the first time you’ve worn a plug while he fucked you. He asked you about ass play about two weeks into sleeping together. He’s had you wear one while he eats out or fingers you. You had never tried anything like this but you were intrigued.

When he ended up buying a cute rose gold plug you couldn’t help but be excited. Getting on to the bed presenting yourself to him he grips your fleshy cheek, massaging it as he kisses the other one. His long fingers slide through your slit brushing against your clit.

Clicking the bottle of lube open he dollops amount onto your tight ring of muscle.

“Are you going to be a good girl for me?” His finger spreads around the cold lube.

“Yes,” you sigh.

His finger slides into your ass slowly. “Do you think you can wear you cute little plug while I fuck you?”

“Yes,” you mewl as another finger slides into you.

“Maybe one day we can train you to take all of me in your ass,” he squeezes the flesh of your ass cheek.

“Too big-“

“You’re right, pretty girl. I think I’m too big for this tight little hole.”

Removing his fingers from your ass he reached for the plug on the bed next to him. He generously coats in lube before pressing it to your ass. Ever so slowly he pushes it in. A loud moan pssses your lips once it’s fully inside. His thumb adds a little pressure to it causing your eyes to roll back.

“Baby scoot forward. I’m going to eat you out and prep you.”

The feeling of Jeonghan’s mouth on your core has your eyes rolling back in your head. Hands grip the sheets below. His tongue keeps dipping into your entrance earning a moan. His thumb keeps applying pressure to the plug giving you a whole new feeling.

Before Jeonghan you had plenty of sexual encounters with other men, but no other man has ever tried to understand your body as well as he can. This man loves your pussy and will never miss an opportunity to have his head between your legs. He knows all the right things to do to have you crying out his name.

Fingers claw at the sheets below as he gets you closer and closer to the edge. Curving his fingers he’s brushing the special place inside you that makes you see stars.

Your face is pressed against the bed as you collapse onto your elbows. All the pressure building inside you finally brushes as you cry out his name. Pulling away from you he wipes away your release from his mouth with the back of your hand. A cocky grin is plastered across his lips as he watches you absolutely fascinated by your fucked out expression.

“I don’t think you have ever came that hard.”

“I felt like I was going to black out,” you pant.

“Do you need a break or can you take me?” He crawls off the bed.

“Please fuck me,” you all but beg.

Closing your eyes you take a moment to calm down. You can hear the sounds of him removing his clothes. The sound of his belt hitting the floor lets you know he’s naked. The bed behind you dips. Seconds later his hands are rubbing your side. “You’re always so good for me.”

Slowly pushing yourself up onto your hands, you look over your shoulder at him. He looks lost in a haze of lust. Taking his length into his hand he slowly runs it through your wet folds. Tapping it against your sensitive clit he earns a moan from you.

“Are you ready?”

“Yes-“ you moan.

Pushing into you his hand grips your hips pulling you flush against him. The feeling of him stretching you out while a plug is snug in your ass is intoxicating. You haven’t ever felt this full before. Closing your eyes taking in the feeling of giving yourself a moment to adjust.

He must be able to tell that you need time. His hands slowly rub your side. “Such a good girl.”

“Baby,” you moan.

“Is it too much?”

“No it feels so good-“ you feel as if you’re stumbling over your words. “Can you go slow?”

“Yeah-“ he groans. “You feel so tight.”

The full feeling is like nothing you have ever experienced before. The room is filled with sounds of skin slapping against skin, his heavy breathing, and your echoing moans.

His pace picks up, and he keeps up his deep thrust. One hand rests on the small of your back signaling for you to drop back down to your elbows.

This feels like a whole new angle. His dick curves up a little bit and with this angle he’s brushing a new spot inside of you. On top of the snug feeling of the plug inside your ass. Maybe one day you’ll let him take the time and actually try and properly fuck your ass.

“Hannie-“ you whine. Your brain feels like it’s turning to mush with each thrust.

“Baby you’re squeezing me so tight.”

You can’t imagine how tight you must feel to him right now. “Harder-“

“You want more?”

“Please.” You’re absolutely desperate to fall apart like this.

His hips snap a little harder helping you chase your release. Drool is practically falling out of your mouth against the sheets below as he fucks you basically stupid.

A ringing takes over your ears as your orgasm hits you out of nowhere. Closing your eyes you cry out his name. Moments later he slams into you three times before holding you flush against his pelvis. You feel extra full as he finishes inside you.

Ever so slowly he pulls out. His eyes are locked on your core watching his milky white release drip out of you.

“I might actually have a breeding kink when it comes to you.” His words instantly earn a smile.

“Are you that down bad for me?” He rolls his eyes. Hoping off the bed runs off to grab a cloth to clean up his mess he made of your pussy.

“Baby we should shower.”

“Can we wait like ten minutes? You fucked me so good I don’t know if my arms work.”

He laughs and crawls back on the bed as you slowly lay down flat. Your head is off to the side watching him get comfortable next to you.

“I love spending Mondays with you.” He says.

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Work seems to suck less knowing at the end of the night you’ll be in bed with Jeonghan whether that means you’ll be having sex or just hanging out. The second your shift wraps up you find Jeonghan standing in the waiting area talking to Seungcheol while he waits for you.

Walking toward them you plan to keep it professional. Seungcheol is well aware you’re seeing Jeonghan but technically he’s your boss and you’re not sure if it’s frowned upon to be dating your coworker. Jeonghan grabs your hand pulling you close to him.

“Ready sweet cheeks,” your nickname causes you to instantly roll your eyes while Seungcheol barks out a laugh.

“I’m going to go on a limb and say she doesn’t like that nickname,” Seungcheol says.

“Do you not like it bunny?” He often calls you bunny and you think that nickname is cute. Sweet cheeks on the other hand can go.

“Please stick to bunny,” you lean up pressing your lips to his.

Soonyoung walks up with Joshua in tow. “Are you two down for drinks tonight?”

Putting his arm over your shoulder he pulls you closer to him. “I’m good with a couple of drinks. How about you bunny?”

“I’m good for one or two beers and then I need to go to bed.”

“Which bed are you going to? Yours that’s been empty for a week or darling Yoon Jeonghan’s?” Soonyoung loves to tease you.

“She’ll be in mine,” Jeonghan responds before you even have a chance.

“Seungcheol, are you joining us?” Joshua says walking up.

“Why not?” your boss shrugs.

Standing in the bar you watch as Seungcheol, Joshua and Jeonghan are at the bar talking to Wonwoo. You’re sitting with Soonyoung at a table sipping on your beer. “You know you seem really happy with your boyfriend.”

“He’s not my boyfriend.” You haven’t labeled this and you don’t want to go around calling him that if he doesn’t see this the same way.

“Ma’am you have been sleeping with him, going on dates and practically living at his place three days a week. If that is not your boyfriend this might be the strangest friends with benefits relationship I have ever seen.”

“I think we’re just casual.”

“Does he know that?” He arches his eyebrow.

“I’m not sure.”

“Maybe you guys should talk about that tonight. I’m your best friend and I can tell when you're head over heels for someone. And you my dear best friend, you are down bad for Yoon Jeonghan.”

After a couple beers at the bar with everyone from work you go home with Jeonghan just like he said you would. Walking into his apartment both remove your shoes before heading off to the bathroom. You brush your teeth with the toothbrush you keep here.

Glancing around the bathroom you realize how Jeonghan has truly gone out of his way to make you feel at home. He’s gotten you your same face wash you use at home and even your face cream. You snap out of your thoughts when you see Jeonghan naked standing behind you through the bathroom mirror. He smacks your ass before walking off to the shower. He starts the water and lets it heat up for a moment before sliding the door open.

“Did you wanna join me?” He asked.

“I washed my hair yesterday and I don’t wanna blow dry it tonight.”

“Come join me and I’ll try not to get your hair wet.”

Pulling off your sleep shirt you leave at his place you strip naked. Sliding the shower door open, you step towards the warm water making sure to keep your hair as dry as possible. You watch him as he washes his hair. He’s so beautiful without even trying.

Lay on his bed, his body resting between your spread legs.

“Jeonghan, can I ask you something?” He’s kissing his way across your chest.

“Yeah.” He says between kisses.

“Am I your girlfriend?”

“Do you wanna be?” He looks up.

“I see you as my boyfriend but we haven’t ever discussed that or even talked about if we’re exclusive.” This feels insane you’re discussing this three months in.

“Do you think I’m sleeping with other people?” He gives you a confused look.

“No, I hope you aren’t.”

“Bunny when we fuck I don’t wear a condom. The moment we did that we were automatically exclusives.”

“That doesn’t answer the question about what exactly we are.”

“Bunny, you're my girlfriend. Wonwoo literally calls you my girlfriend. Everyone at the restaurant refers to me as your boyfriend.” He smiles.

“That’s cool. I’m glad we figured that out.” You let out a nervous chuckle. He presses his lips to yours for a heated kiss.

“You know you could have brought this up after the museum and I would have told you I was your boyfriend right then?” He smiles.

“You mean the first time we went out?” You instantly think back to your first date together.

“Yes, our first first date.”

“You were fine with being my boyfriend then?” Based on the way you hooked up with first time you always assumed he saw that time together as something casual like a simple hook up.

“Hell the first time we had sex I would have said yes to being your boyfriend. I had a crush on you for months when I thought you were with Soonyoung.”

“I still can’t believe you thought I was with Soonyoung.”

He closed his eyes and smiled before pressing his lips to the tip of your nose. “Just be happy I was finally brave enough to ask you out.”

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

It’s been a week since Jeonghan and you finally labeled your relationship and life has been extra crazy. You’ve been at home more often than you have been at Jeonghan’s. Normally you spent Mondays together, but this week Jeonghan ended up having to cover Mingyu at work and you spent the day with your mom. She unexpectedly was in the city for the day and wanted to spend time with you.

She spent all of lunch asking you questions about your boyfriend. She made a big deal about asking if he would come with you to dinner next Sunday. You weren’t sure if you were in the next stage of your relationship when it was time to meet the parents, but you knew you should at least ask him.

On Tuesday when you finally saw him at work you decided not to bring up meeting your parents. You wanted to do this away from work.

After work Jeonghan didn’t even give you a chance to pretend you were going to go home with Soonyoung. He grabbed your hand pulling you towards his car while shouting a goodbye at your roommate.

After a long day at work Jeonghan absolutely loves showering together. Nothing sexual normally happens in the shower. He just likes being close with you there.

He’s in the middle of rinsing his hair. You’re focused on him. You need to ask him something important but you’re kind of scared for some reason.

“You can absolutely say no, but would you be interested in going to a family dinner with me?”

“You want me to meet your parents?” He raised his eyebrow stepping out from under the water.

“It would be nice, but you can absolutely say no. I understand if this is too soon.”

“We’ve been seeing each other for four months. I would like to meet your parents. I think they should meet your boyfriend.” It’s so nice to hear him refer to himself as your boyfriend.

“You're much more calm about this than I expected you to be.”

He steps towards, reaching out he pulls your wet body close to his. “This is the natural next step in a relationship. I care about you bunny, of course I should meet your parents.”

Sunday afternoon rolled around. You just finished your shift at the bakery and Jeonghan picks you up. He’s got two duffle bags in the car in case you decide to stay the night. Your parents live two hours away. The ride to your parents house you’re a little nervous but you aren’t sure why. Jeonghan is literally the perfect boyfriend. You know your family will love him. But for some reason, first meetings are always scary.

Standing in the kitchen making cookies with your grandma you look out into the window and see Jeonghan laughing about something with your father.

“Your boyfriend seems like a catch.” Your grandma has always seemed like a good judgment of character.

“I really like him.” That’s truly an understatement. You are very much head over heels for him.

“You said he’s a cook at your restaurant?”

“He’s a line cook.”

“There is something special about a couple who share a love of food. Your grandfather learned to bake for me.”

“He knew how to bake before me, but he’s really helped encourage me to bake more and to learn new recipes.”

“That right there darling makes him a keeper.” Your grandma smiles as she pats your back. “Pass me the brown sugar.”

Baking with your grandma has always made you happy. Looking out the window you find Jeonghan smiling back at you. Glancing back at your grandma you watch as she mixes together the batter.

“Gram, I love him.”

“That’s good darling, because he looks like he’s in love with you.”

Your evening with your parents and grandma is nice. When dinner time comes around you notice that instantly Jeonghan fits in with your family. Your mother already adores him and your father is making plans for the next time you come home. You couldn’t have asked for a better first meeting. On the drive up here you weren’t fully sure if you’re staying the night. Time seemed to slip away and before you knew it midnight was approaching.

“Why do you two stay the night?” Your father says walking into the kitchen where you and Jeonghan are doing the dishes.

“I don’t think you guys should drive home in the middle of the night,” your mother chimes in.

“We brought duffle bags. We can stay if you would like,” Jeonghan says.

“Let’s stay and head home in the morning.”

“At least stay for breakfast before heading home,” your mother says.

Sitting in the room you grew up in Jeonghan is searching through his duffel bag. You're perched on your full sized bed.

“Hannie?”

“Yeah bunny?” He stands up holding his pajama pants.

“Can I tell you I love you?” You thought maybe the first time you said those three big words it would be some kind of grand gesture. But maybe it doesn’t need to be, because saying it right now like this feels right.

He steps closer to you so he’s right in front of you. “Only if I can say I love you too.” He leans forward pressing his lips to yours. “Everything about being with you is easy. You were easy to fall in love with. I wanted to say it when you agreed to be my girlfriend, but I thought I should wait a minute.” A warm feeling takes over your chest. Your eyes start to brim with tears. You care so deeply for him and you have absolutely fallen head over heels in love with. Loving him was as easy as breathing.

“Being with you just feels right.” He smiles at your words. His hand rests on your cheek pushing away the salty happy tear that slides down your cheek.

“That’s good because I’m going to love you forever.” Jeonghan has proven to always be a man of his word and you know that he’s the person you’re supposed to be with.

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[pricesprincess]

Oooh may I ask for a John and Wife!Reader roleplay?? I feel like it's something he would try out to spice up their sex life with the Missus! Like he'd be kind of reluctant about it until he sees how into it Reader is heheh 👀

-✨️(if this emoji isn't taken)

smut mdni | explicit smut | alcohol but no one is drunk or even tipsy | roleplay

yes, yes, yes you may! I kinda went off on this with 2.5k wc eta I kinda went off script, was typing and blacked out to this lmaooo

"We went to a hotel and pretended not to know each other. It was a lot of fun." The actress on the flickering screen in front of John spoke as she ran her manicured fingers through her husband's hair. 

John huffed slightly, the cigar being squished between his fingers as he listened to the rest of the interview of a few dark romance authors you read from. 

They were doing Q&A's for their fans, and this one was all about roleplay, something new for you both to try out. Lately, it's been nothing but missionary, and the sex has gone stale as much as he hated to admit it, his job and duties kept him exhausted. 

It wasn't something John was proud to admit, knowing you weren't happy; it left a bitter taste in his throat as he clicked through a few more videos, gathering ideas to help the flickering dying flame. 

Most of your orgasms were self-given at this point, late at night when John was gone during a mission, which seems to be happening more and more, leaving you alone to take care of the house and yourself. 

A few days later, with his plan set in stone, the dinner table had been set with candles and takeout from your favorite place because the burnt food was now outside in the garbage with a single rose surrounded by rose petals in the middle. He wondered if this was too much, trying too hard, but he wanted you to feel loved. 

Your key slid into the lock before you pushed open the door, thankful that John was home and, this time, hopefully for a long time, his presence made the house a home, and the warmth from the furnace made you shiver as you slipped your coat and shoes off. "I'm home!" 

John stepped into the entryway, his face flushed, and sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He opened his arms, letting you fall into them with a giggle while you peppered his face with soft, sweet honey kisses. 

"I missed you so much!" You squealed and wrapped your arms around him, seeing the candles flickering in the small kitchen casting shadows across the wall that piqued your interest. "John?" 

He smiled, staying silent as he gently guided you to the dining room table you two grabbed at an estate sale a year ago before buying your shared home. Now, it's held so many memories, grooved into the wood you'd forever cherish. "Did you do something wrong?" 

Even though your voice was teasing, John's stomach churned with guilt as he pulled your chair back. He held your hand and gently kissed you, helping you sink down as you looked up at him. 

"Not' taking care of my wife," John replied, the sentence enough to make you pause, your hand hovering about the wine glass. 

You frowned, tilting your head up to look at your husband, taking his hand in yours, brushing your thumb across his coarse knuckles. "Why do you say that baby? You take real good care of me." You hummed. 

His lips twitched as he took the chair from across you, plating the food. "Haven't made you giggle or laugh in a while, haven't been home to be here like a man should, and I haven't made you cum." 

Oh. 

Your hand covered his as you looked at him, the candle flickering over your face as you cocked your head. "You've been super busy. I knew what I signed up for when I married you, honey. I don't hold it against you. Do I wish you were home more often? Yes, you're my man." 

"You're my man." Those words echoed through his head, and at that moment, it was decided that he was going to be where he belonged, but tonight wasn't about that. It was about making you feel good. 

Dinner happened with a soft hum of conversation as you ended up nestled on John's lap, your thighs draped over his as you fed each other in between slow kisses that made your toes curl. 

John's hands roamed your body, his rough palms bunching the sundress you wore to your hips. "Tomorrow night, we got plans. Come home after work." He hummed in your ear, kissing it. Once dinner was over, you and John fell into bed, naked and warm, curled together. 

Your husband's words played through your head all morning as you woke up to do your morning routine, your legs still wobbly from the way John had you bouncing on his dick like his personal toy. 

It only made you flustered, and the workday felt like forever, especially with John's teasing texts about what he had planned for the evening ahead. when the clock hit five, you zoomed from the building to your car as fast as possible. 

Excitement bubbled in your veins as you drove home. The streets were dim, and the moon brightened over the small town you and John had settled in. The porch light was dim as you pulled the car into the driveway. 

John was in the bedroom when you entered after slipping your shoes off; the grin on your face was infectious as John matched it, his hand sweeping to the bed where a dress lay, paired with your shoes. 

Your eyes drifted to the mattress to see it was the same dress you wore on your first date, a beautiful color that made your skin glow, but John did it. "What's this all for?" You asked curiously with a grin. 

"Our date, told you luv. Tonight, it's goin' to be different. We're not husband and wife, but a man in need of a pretty woman's cunt." 

His vulgar words made your jaw drop as your cunt ached, throbbing to be filled like last night, the memories making you shift in your spot as you looked at him, dressed in jeans and a button-up, the sleeves rolled up to the elbow, making him look like a snack. 

Without realizing it, you stepped forward and wrapped your arms around his neck to pull him in a heated his; his hand rested on the globes of your ass, giving it a squeeze. "So, we're strangers?" You asked, leaning back with a sly smile as you giggled softly. 

John held you as you swayed back and forth, your fingers locked behind his neck. "Yes, ma'am. You'll be sittin' at the bar alone, where I come and save you from bein' stood up. Your safeword is the same." 

The way he looked at you made your stomach flutter. Even years after being married, John had this way of making you feel the same as he did on the first date, giddy like a schoolgirl with her first crush. 

"I'll need the sadness slurped from my pussy." You teased, making him shake his head and chuckle, the sound like music to your ears. 

Once ready, John guided you to his car, opened the door, and kissed your head. Inside, you held his hand, buzzing with excitement. 

“We’re pretendin’ we don’t know each other, somethin’ new and fun,” John murmured, his voice warm like whiskey simmering in your veins, making you flush as you giggled, squeezing his hand agreeing. 

Then it hit you: John skimmed your books, which made a lot of sense when you noticed that a few were out of place months before he was deployed. “You read my smut books, didn’t you?” You teased. 

Your husband looked at you with a wink that melted you like butter in a hot pan, screaming and burning as your eagerness filled the vehicle's cabin, putting John on edge. This was something new and way out of his realm, but seeing you happy about it eased the growing tension in his chest. 

The tire crunched over gravel as he pulled into the parking lot, breaking the silence. 

John was out of the car, opening your door before you could grab the handle, his hand warm and calloused in yours as he helped you out. His other palm rested on your hip. "I'll be inside in five, luv, be a good girl and wait for me." He hummed, leaning in to kiss you, soft, tender. 

You pulled away, resting your hand on his chest and looking at him with all the affection in the world swirling in your eyes. You pecked his lips and glided your hand over his pecs before walking inside. 

Thankfully, the bar wasn't too busy, seeing that it was a Thursday night, giving you most of the bar to yourself and John, who came in through the back door, his eyes scanning the small, cozy space. 

People left you be while you ordered a glass of wine, something sweet that exploded on your taste buds, trying not to watch John from the corner of your eyes even though you could feel him staring. 

It burned a hole in you, melting straight to between your legs, your clit throbbing already. You kept your posture sad and hunched, remembering that the reason you were here was being stood up. 

Two minutes later, John was perched on the barstool next to you. His drink was already ordered when his eyes shifted to you, filled with mock concern. “What’s a pretty thing like you doin’ here all alone?”

You turned and looked at him. The instant your eyes locked, it was over. You gigglingly covered your mouth and shook your head. “Sorry. I don’t know if I can do this; you’re so…you.” You hummed.

John shook his head, his lips twitching with a smile. “Darlin’, what the hell am I supposed to do with you? And what’s that supposed to mean?” He teased, wrapping his arm around your waist when you nuzzled your forehead against his pecking his lips.

“You’re my soulmate, my man; I can’t pretend not to know you when I was riding you like a cowgirl just last night, and we’ve shared so much. It was a hot idea, but I want you as my husband.” You sighed, running your fingers through his brown roots, tugging gently. 

A deep groan rumbled through his chest, feeling your tongue glide into his mouth, tasting and licking the bourbon he ordered and sipped on.

The deep longing carved out a place in his soul, healing the cracks in him. John’s hand bunched the fabric of your dress around your waist, pulling you off the barstool and against him, leaving no room to mistake the feel the desire he felt, the hard poke against your thigh. 

Hand in hand again, John led you from the bar and outside into the cool summer breeze, your giggles breaking up the sounds of a few cars passing by while you opened the back door and guided him to the backseat slapping his ass and hearing him grunt.

John settled on the cool leather, spreading his legs as he helped you join him. He sat on his lap and leaned back while you shut the door, sealing both of you off from everyone. “You’re so handsome, so sexy.”

Your words were laced with affection and desire as your hands roamed his body, running over the soft pudge of his stomach softened by homecooked meals made with love and your spoiling. 

While you touched him, he returned the same favor, his fingers grazing under your dress, teasing, making your skin breakout in goosebumps while you humped him, grinding your cunt against him. 

The car was filled with heavy breathing and teeth-clacking kissing as your hips worked harder until John slid his hand into your panties, feeling how wet and slick you were, his fingers gliding against the lips of your cunt, making him groan again. “Fuck, sweetheart. Drippin’ for me.”

While leaning back, John sunk two thick fingers inside you with a squelch that was music to his ears; pumping them in and out at a slow pace had you feral, the teasing of his thumb against your clit ghosting.

He knew what he was doing, barely giving in until he was pressing against your g-spot, pressing his thumb down with circles, making you clench and hump his fingers this time, your hands resting on his shoulders, moaning, getting lost in the haze of it all but the flash of car lights pulling into the parking lot had you gripping his wrist.

“John!” You giggled and whined when he pulled his fingers out, his dark eyes watching as you sucked yourself off him before moving out of the backseat fixing your dress, and getting into the passenger. 

It didn’t take long for your husband to join you, his cock still hard and straining painfully against his zipper. He pressed on the gas, pulled out of the lot to drive home as quickly as possible, and John helped you out of the car, holding your hand while leading you inside. 

You both barely made it past the door before John had you pressed against the wall, his lips desperate and hungry while his hands tore at your dress until it pooled around your heeled feet. Your touch was hot, scorching against his skin as you undressed him not breaking the kiss. 

All tongue and hands, you and John ended up on the floor naked and warm, tangled together. His cock rutted against your hip as he helped you to a position of sixty-nine with you on top, still wearing your shoes. 

John didn’t give you any time to do anything before his hands were on your hips, bringing you down on his face, fully knowing he’d die a happy man if this were his last meal. Slowly, he licked a hot swipe up your cunt from your quivering hole to your swollen clit, flicking and sucking.

Your jaw went slack at the feeling as your fingers wrapped around the base of his cock before your mouth was wrapped around his leaky head, going further until you gagged, feeling the curly and hoarse hair tickling before you found a slow and teasing pace. 

It was a mess of spit and slick as you bobbed your head feeling his tongue swirl over your clit before kissing your pussy that drenched his face and beard leaving it glistening like his sack from your salvia. 

Moaning around him, the sound vibrating around his cock, making him grip your ass, forcing you to ride his face harder until your orgasm burst open, making you squeal and gag on his cock, jerking your hips. 

But that didn’t stop John; his tongue was relentless in making out with your cunt making it sticky and prolonging the cloud of pleasure. It spurred you to make him a mess, too; your tongue lavished each inch of him, spitting and jerking him off, moaning and grinding down. 

There was nothing but panting and sucking that filled the small entryway of your shared home when John felt himself tighten before spilling down your throat, making sure you swallowed all of it. 

After a long moment of sitting there with his cock still in your mouth, feeling it soften, you finally rolled off him stretching your legs with a whine. “I think we need to start stretching before sex.” You giggled. 

John chuckled, his face a mess of your cum glazing his lips. He rolled to his side, caressing your curves, lingering over your breasts, his face ruddy with the afterglow. “We’re not done yet, but you’re right, darlin’. We must stretch and move to the bed; my back is achin’.”

[sapphiresaphics]

You’re right. It is polite to do that. But it’s also… I dunno… kinda boring? And it often doesn’t push the story forward.

Let’s look at it this way: We know that initially they planned on several additional seasons and ultimately were only given 2. We don’t know when that cut back was dictated to them from up on high, but it’s very easy to assume it happened sometime between season 1 and 2’s production. Very likely after most of season 1’s setup had already been finished and animated.

And, given how little time they had available to them for season 2, they opted instead to focus on ways to communicate this stuff non-verbally most of the time and to trust that we, as smart intelligent viewers, can piece together stuff ourselves.

They have a grand total of 18 episodes in total for this entire show. There are other shows that have double that number for just one season. Time is of the essence and every frame costs hundreds of dollars. So if it’s not really relevant it goes on the cutting room floor. Arcane is nothing if not EFFICIENT with its storytelling. And that’s a stylistic choice the creators have made.

And let’s not forget this doesn’t just exist around Caitlyn. Vi never apologizes for punching Powder as a kid. She apologizes for leaving and calling her a Jinx, but never for punching her. Vi also punches Isha. It’s an accident, but she still never apologizes for that either. Ekko never apologizes for kidnapping Vi and Caitlyn. Jinx never apologizes for killing Ekko’s friends. Jayce never apologizes for killing a child. Ambessa never apologizes for slapping Mel. Heimerdinger never apologizes for letting the undercity’s problems fester for so long. Mel never really apologizes for using Jayce and Viktor as investments. The list goes on. So WHY is it ONLY on Caitlyn in these critiques about the show?

A couple more little quibbles and distinctions:

Vi was never forced to become an enforcer. When Caitlyn asks her to become an enforcer, Vi turns her down. It’s not until after Caitlyn almost dies during the memorial attack does Vi reconsider the offer. And she doesn’t do it because she was pressured into it, she does it because she wants to keep Caitlyn safe. The only thing Vi trusts are her fists. If she’s there, she can take care of Jinx while also protecting the woman she loves. Even if it means putting on the Enforcer uniform.

Also, Vi doesn’t care about Zaun all that much. She never fought for the city. In fact, she has been actively hostile towards Zaun since Season 1. Let’s not forget that she went in performing vigilante Justice and got a kid killed in the process. Her goal has always been to protect her family, and that means people like Jinx and Caitlyn.

As for the “I’m sorry I was wrong?” Caitlyn DOES that. It’s just non-verbally. See, when Caitlyn has Jinx locked up she doesn’t know what to do with her. She has seen first hand that Jinx can be trusted. She is not the maniacal raving lunatic that killed her mother anymore. She has changed. She tries to talk to Jinx, but that doesn’t help her make a decision.

So she lets Vi choose. She intentionally leaves the prison empty of guards and allows Vi to steal the keys to free her sister. She has no guarantee that she will ever see Vi again, and she suspects that Vi and Jinx will just run away together. That’s why when she goes down there and finds Vi locked in the cell instead of Jinx, she knows what happened. And when Vi is at her lowest, thinking she betrayed Caitlyn by going behind her back to free Jinx against her wishes, Caitlyn tells her “no, I let you do this. Because I give up on hating your sister. You are more important to me than my hatred of Jinx and you should be free to make your own decisions about who you get to love.”

That’s WHY Vi jumps on Caitlyn in the prison cell. Caitlyn just told her that she was giving up stoking the flames of the fire that tore them apart. This is akin to a loved one giving up alcohol or smoking or going to therapy or basically tossing aside their abusive habits because their love for their partner is more important to them than their vices. That was like the BIGGEST apology Caitlyn could ever give Vi. No amount of “I’m sorry” does THAT justice.

I get it, you wanted her to SAY the words. But the show doesn’t do that. The show is a VISUAL show and ACTIONS speak louder than words ever could. So Arcane does Caitlyn’s apology through her actions. To assume the worst in Caitlyn after such a grand gesture is kinda silly IMO.

No disrespect, I just find a lot of this stuff to be kinda nitpicky. The show is a visual show. It tells its narrative visually. It always has. It always will. Demanding Caitlyn say “sorry” when no one else ever does and ignoring that she performs one of the greatest acts of love you could give a partner is frustrating to say the least.

“Caitlyn never apologizes for her actions so how do we know she’s remorseful of them?”

Well you see… when Caitlyn gets asked if she likes men or women by Vi, we never get an answer from Caitlyn there either. But then later in the episode we SEE her behaving differently and flirting with a woman. So that answers our question for us. We don’t need to hear her say “I’m a lesbian” or “I like girls” because the show SHOWS us that she likes girls.

Often times if you have a concern like this, it IS addressed in the show. Just not in blatantly obvious and vocal ways. You actually need to pay attention.

So like… yea, we don’t really hear Caitlyn say outright “I feel remorse for my actions” but there’s like a MOUNTAIN of evidence (Kirammountains worth haha) that show she feels this way. From her confrontational arguments with Ambessa, to her pointing a gun at singe, to her sneaking around tracking singe, to her betraying Ambessa, to her shouting “I know!” when confronted by Vi, to her saying to Jinx “hating you I’ve hated myself,” to her ultimately letting Vi free her sister thus proving to Vi that she’s letting her hatred for Jinx go, to her sad “are you still in this fight, Violet?” at the end of the show… using the context clues the characters provide through facial acting and body language we can TELL that she’s remorseful.

Imagine that!

[nameless-jamie]

Hiiiiii, we got Jamie's birthday, can we get PA's?

Shoebox

Masterlist

Jamie Tartt x fem! PA reader

A/N: I love it! Have been thinking about this hard and wanted to do this in a very emotional way because I felt like PA is a person that wants nobody to know her birthday.

TW: cursing, innuendos, fluff

Jamie Tartt doesn’t remember dates.

He barely remembers his own birthday half the time, much less anyone else’s. Anniversaries? Forget it. Holidays? Only when someone reminds him. It’s never been his thing.

That's why he has Y/N, his personal assistant, to remember them for him.

So when he glances at Y/N’s phone screen—purely by accident, obviously—and sees a message from her mum saying, Happy early birthday, love. Hope you have a lovely day tomorrow—he has to read it twice.

Tomorrow?

His gaze flickers to Y/N, who is sitting on the other end of the couch, legs curled up, scrolling through something on her laptop. She doesn’t react. Doesn’t so much as blink at her phone. No excitement, no mention of plans.

And that’s when Jamie realizes—she’s keeping it a secret. She's keeping her birthday a secret.

He doesn’t understand why. Y/N is the most organized person he knows. She’s the one who reminds him of every single birthday, arranges gifts for his teammates when he forgets, keeps track of every little thing. But her own birthday? She’s just… ignoring it?

Jamie locks his jaw, turning his attention back to the telly, pretending like he didn’t see a thing.

But he did. And now it’s rattling around in his head, sticking there like a song he can’t get rid of.

That night, Jamie lies in bed, staring at the ceiling.

He could just say something.

But if she wanted people to know, she would have told him.

So instead, he does something different—something that makes his heart hammer against his ribs.

He gets up, pulls out the shoebox from the top of his closet, and dumps the contents onto his bed.

A mess of ticket stubs, polaroids, receipts, and random scraps of paper falls out. He sifts through them, picking up a blurry photo of them at a team dinner, a crumpled note she had once left on his gym bag (Don’t be late today, Tartt. I mean it.), a matchday program where she had circled his name in blue ink.

Jamie doesn’t know why he’s kept these things. He’s never been sentimental like that.

But somehow, without even realizing it, he’s been keeping her.

The next day, Jamie acts normal.

Or at least, he tries to.

It’s harder than he expects. Every time he looks at her, he wants to say something. But he doesn’t. Instead, he pays extra attention—watching for any sign that she might, at the very least, acknowledge her own birthday.

Nothing.

No one at the club knows. No one wishes her. She doesn’t act any different.

And for some reason, it pisses him off.

At lunch, he slides into the seat next to her, nudging her arm. "You, uh, doin’ anything later?"

She shakes her head. "Nah. Just gonna go home."

Jamie frowns. "Borin'. "

She huffs a quiet laugh. "Not everyone needs to be constantly entertained, Jamie."

"Yeah, but—" He stops himself. Shrugs. "Dunno. Just seems like a waste of uhm— day."

She tilts her head, narrowing her eyes. "What do you mean? Why are you being weird?"

"I’m not."

"You are."

"Oi, shut up."

She laughs, shaking her head, and Jamie forces himself to act like it’s just another day.

But it isn’t.

That evening, Y/N comes home to find a small, wrapped package sitting on her coffee table.

There’s no note. No indication of who left it.

Frowning, she picks it up, carefully peeling back the paper.

Inside is a shoebox filled with random stuff.

She stills, fingers tracing over the outside of the box, heart pounding for reasons she doesn’t quite understand. Slowly, she skims through the contents—and her breath catches in her throat.

It’s them.

Photo after photo, little notes, ticket stubs from games they attended together, receipts from coffee shops where they’d sat for hours going over Jamie's schedule. There’s a picture of her laughing at something stupid he’d said, a doodle he’d made on a napkin that she had long forgotten about, a torn page from an old match program where he had scribbled, bet you a tenner I score today (and she had, indeed, owed him ten quid after that game).

She swallows hard.

Near the bottom of the box, in Jamie’s unmistakable handwriting, there’s a note.

"Dunno why you don’t tell people it’s your birthday. But I remember things when they matter."

Her breath catches.

Because Jamie Tartt doesn’t remember birthdays. He doesn’t remember dates.

But somehow—somehow—he remembered hers.

The knock on her door comes late.

Too late for anyone but him.

She opens it to find Jamie standing there, hands in his pockets, rocking back on his heels.

"Hey."

She blinks at him, still holding the shoebox in her hands. "Jamie, did you—?"

"Like it?" He grins, but there’s something softer behind it. "Spent fuckin’ ages collecting that stuff, y’know."

She lets out a breathless laugh, shaking her head. "Jamie, I—"

"You don’t have to say anythin’," he interrupts, then gestures behind him. "But, uh, you do have to come with me."

She raises an eyebrow. "Why?"

His smirk deepens. "You’ll see."

She should say no. She should protest, tell him she doesn’t want a big deal made out of today.

But she doesn’t.

Because Jamie Tartt, of all people, remembered.

And for once, she thinks, maybe her birthday is something worth celebrating.

Y/N stares at Jamie for a long second, her fingers tightening around the shoebox.

He’s grinning at her like he hasn’t just completely dismantled her entire sense of reality—like he hasn’t just remembered something she never even told him.

She wants to ask how he found out. Wants to ask why he went through the effort when he forgets literally everyone else’s birthdays.

But instead, she exhales, tilts her head, and says, “You’re not gonna tell me where we’re going, are you?”

Jamie smirks. “Where’s the fun in that?”

She doesn’t protest when he leads her outside. Doesn’t roll her eyes when he opens the car door for her with an exaggerated flourish. Doesn’t even question the way he hums under his breath as he drives—some aimless tune, his fingers tapping against the steering wheel in time with the rhythm.

It’s… nice.

Too nice.

Because Jamie Tartt has always been in her life like a storm—loud and chaotic and everywhere all at once. But this? This is different. It’s steady. Purposeful.

And that’s what scares her.

They don’t talk much as he drives. He makes a few comments about some knob on the pitch today, how Roy nearly had an aneurysm over something someone did in training. She nods, hums in agreement, but her mind is elsewhere.

Because no matter how hard she tries to focus on the words coming out of his mouth, her gaze keeps drifting back to the shoebox in her lap.

Jamie had kept all of this.

Ticket stubs, stupid notes, photos she didn’t even know existed.

She doesn’t know what to do with that.

Doesn’t know what it means.

But before she can spiral too hard, Jamie pulls up in front of a familiar place.

Her brows furrow. “The Dogtrack?”

Jamie flashes her a grin, hopping out of the car. “C’mon.”

She follows him, still utterly lost. It’s dark, but the entrance is lit up. The usual bustling energy of match days is missing, the stadium eerily quiet.

Jamie pushes open the door and gestures for her to step inside. “After you.”

She gives him a suspicious look but walks in.

And stops dead.

Because standing there—right in the middle of the locker room—is the entire AFC Richmond team.

And they’re all grinning at her.

There’s a giant “HAPPY BIRTHDAY” banner hanging from the ceiling, a table filled with snacks and a cake, and—oh god, is that Roy Kent wearing a bloody party hat?

There’s a beat of stunned silence before Keeley comes bounding over, throwing her arms around her.

“Happy birthday, babe! Jamie said you were trying to be all sneaky about it, but absolutely not.”

She barely has time to process that before she’s being passed from person to person—Rebecca giving her a warm hug, Sam beaming at her, Dani nearly lifting her off the ground in excitement.

She hears Isaac loudly exclaim, “Wait, I knew we were missin’ someone’s birthday this month!”

Colin laughs. “Mate, you did not.”

In the middle of it all, Jamie watches her.

She meets his eyes across the room, her heart hammering in her chest.

He doesn’t say anything. Just smirks and nods toward the table like go on, then.

And Y/N, for the first time in a long time, thinks that maybe—just maybe—her birthday is something worth celebrating after all.

The party is chaos.

Good chaos, the kind she never would have planned for herself but can’t help smiling at. The team is in full celebration mode—Dani is leading a conga line around the locker room, Sam is passionately debating cake flavors with Rebecca, and Roy has miraculously kept the party hat on despite muttering curses under his breath every time someone points it out.

Y/N lets herself enjoy it. She laughs when Colin hands her a drink, shakes her head fondly when Keeley insists on taking selfies with her, and even joins in when Isaac starts up some ridiculous drinking game involving half the squad and an alarming amount of tequila.

But eventually, it all becomes a lot.

Not in a bad way, just in an overwhelming way.

So she quietly slips outside.

The air is cool against her skin, a welcome contrast to the warmth inside. She leans against the railing overlooking the training pitch, letting out a slow breath.

She still doesn’t know how to process all of this.

Jamie—who forgets every birthday, who once confidently said the Queen’s Jubilee was in March—had remembered hers. And not just remembered. He had planned.

And the shoebox…

Her fingers tighten around the railing.

She doesn’t know how long she stands there before she hears the door open behind her.

Footsteps. Familiar ones.

Then Jamie’s voice, soft but teasing. “Oi. You ditchin’ your own party?”

She huffs a laugh but doesn’t turn around. “Just needed some air.”

A beat of silence. Then, “Too much?”

She finally glances over her shoulder. Jamie is standing there, hands in his pockets, watching her with that unreadable expression of his—the one that isn’t quite cocky, isn’t quite soft, but somewhere in between.

She exhales. “A little.”

He nods like he understands, stepping up beside her. They stand there for a moment, the sounds of the party muffled behind them, the cool night air settling around them.

Then, quietly, she says, “Thank you.”

Jamie tilts his head. “For what?”

She turns to face him fully now, and god, he’s so close. Close enough that she can see the flicker of uncertainty in his eyes, like he doesn’t quite know how to respond.

“For everything,” she says, voice softer now. “For remembering. For the shoebox. For… all of this.” She gestures toward the stadium.

Jamie shifts on his feet, like he’s trying to play it cool, but there’s something vulnerable in the way he rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah, well. You were bein’ a right weirdo about it, keepin’ it a secret and all.”

She smiles. “I just don’t really celebrate it.”

“Yeah, I figured,” he murmurs, watching her carefully. “Just thought… dunno. Maybe this year, you should.”

Her throat feels tight.

Because Jamie Tartt—who is meant to be selfish, who is meant to be thoughtless—has seen her in a way no one else has.

She doesn’t know what to say.

So she doesn’t say anything.

Instead, she steps forward and wraps her arms around him.

Jamie stills for half a second before his arms come around her in return, pulling her in. He smells like expensive cologne and whatever shampoo he swears by, and his body is solid and warm against hers.

But then—just as she thinks about pulling away—Jamie shifts.

And suddenly, his arms tighten, and he tugs her even closer, pressing his forehead to the top of her head.

Her heart pounds.

Slowly, his hands move—one settling on her waist, the other slipping up her back.

Then, just when she thinks she’s hit her limit of feeling too much, Jamie shifts again—this time turning her towards the pitch and hugging her from behind, resting his chin against her shoulder, his chest pressing into her back, his arms locked around her like he’s keeping her there.

She swallows hard.

“D’you like it?” he murmurs against her skin.

She closes her eyes. “Yeah.”

Jamie exhales, his breath warm against her. “Good.”

Jamie’s expression shifts, something warmer settling in his eyes.

And then, because she can’t let him have the last word, she smirks. “But, y’know… If I wouldn't have liked it there would always be your plan B present..”

Jamie frowns, confused. “What?”

She bites back a grin, tilting her head at him. “Jamie, I distinctly remember you saying on your birthday that your dream present was me, wrapped in only a bow. What if I wanted the same?”

Jamie blinks.

Then, his lips part, and something dangerous flickers across his face.

“Can be arranged,” he says smoothly.

Y/N snorts, shoving his arm. “Oh, shut up.”

Jamie laughs, but there’s a look in his eyes—one that’s both playful and something else, something deeper.

Something she doesn’t know what to do with.

They stay like that for a long time.

Long enough for the noise of the party to fade into the background. Long enough for her to forget anything else exists.

Just her.

And Jamie.

And this.

[seasidefallenangel]

𓆩♡𓆪 good men die too, i'd rather be with you 𓆩♡𓆪

valentine's day headcanons ft; kanata yatonokami, tenn kujo, sunday, nagi seishiro

notes: fluff, bit suggestive in tenn's

༄ kanata yatonokami:

✣ it’d be a lie to say he’s ever held something so commercial as valentine’s day in high regard. all the overpriced stuff in stores and seeing an onslaught of affection in public made him roll his eyes at best and sick to his stomach at worst.

✣ even after dating you, he’s still not that big of a fan. honestly, he wasn’t even planning on doing much of anything but nayuta nearly crucified him for that idea. 

✣ (nayuta thinks it’s a miracle kanata even has a partner with how unromantic he is.)

✣ gritting his teeth and bearing it, he takes you out to a more laid-back restaurant in hopes that you’ll like it. something on the high end scale would just be uncomfortable and out of place for him, but if you had really insisted he would do it for you.

✣ it’s so cute to see him obviously flustered yet trying to be on his best behavior for you. he’d normally tell you off for acting so smug and lovesick around him but he figures this is the one day he can let you get away with it.

⁀➷ “ugh, can you just… nevermind. don’t expect this all the time. you’re lucky i love you. no shit i said it outloud. you think i’d be doing all this if i didn’t?”

༄ tenn kujo:

✣ obviously trigger’s angel is able to woo his partner. what kind of idol would he be if he didn’t devote every piece of himself into satisfying you?

✣ as much as he’d love to take you out for the holiday, it’d just be too risky. sure he could wear a disguise but he feels as if that takes away from the intimacy of the holiday.

✣ so, the next best thing is to have a catered dinner at his house. how he got aya and kujo to leave is a mystery, but evidently it worked.

✣ everything about him is practiced and perfect, to the point where you tell him it’s okay to be a little more relaxed. it’s not that he’s trying to put up a front, it’s just that he’s so in love with you he doesn’t even know what to do with himself.

✣ at his core, tenn is a giver - to the point where he’d sacrifice his own wellbeing just to see your smile. there’s nothing he values more than making you happy, and it’s evident with every kiss he gives you, setting your heart ablaze as he takes you to his bedroom.

⁀➷ “i’m relieved everything went well. i wish i could’ve taken you on a traditional date, though. maybe sometime in the future? before we get married at least. … obviously i’m marrying you.”

༄ sunday:

✣ the (former) oak family head is no slouch. even if he’s never formally been in a relationship, he was raised right and knows how to treat you. 

✣ granted, the astral express isn’t exactly the ideal location. he’d much prefer to wine and dine, giving you only the best the cosmos have to offer. unfortunately, he’s also kind of broke after the events of penacony and his defecting, so an in-house date it is.

✣ that doesn’t mean it’s any less special than a traditional night out ; in fact, he puts twice the amount of effort into it. from perfecting a meal filled with your favorite dishes, to paying march and stelle to pick up some drinks and gifts on one of their rest stops.

✣ that of course is then curbed by dan heng giving sunday the most distressed look he’s ever seen, because why would anyone trust those two with a task like that? dan heng then takes it upon himself to get the proper gifts instead of the caterpillar farm suggested by stelle.

✣ the upside to the express is that the view is second to none. throughout dinner, sunday’s wings are fluttering a mile a minute as he watches you admire the stars and swirling galaxies that pass by. he can’t be bothered to look out the window when the most ethereal view is sitting across from him.

⁀➷ “can you look at me once more, dearest? no, nothing’s wrong. i just want to imprint this into my memory. if you had told me even a year ago i’d have you in my arms, i’d have assumed it was a terrible joke. i’m simply grateful the aeon’s have led us together.”

༄ nagi seishiro:

✣ reo is easily the most stressed out person in this scenario. for as sweet and clingy nagi is towards you, that boy is romantically dense. he figures he can get you a candy bar and call it a day, and reo is on the urge of strangling him for even suggesting it.

✣ flowers! gifts! chocolate! jewelry! fancy dinner! reo is trying to hammer in some more ideas into nagi’s brain and nagi’s expression grows more and more bored with every word. he even insists that he knows his partner and all of that stuff would probably overwhelm you (and make you think nagi had been kidnapped and brainwashed.)

✣ they compromise in the end. reo uses some connections to have a chef prepare dinner at nagi’s apartment and nagi gets off his lazy ass to buy you some flowers and a box of chocolate. for all his whining about existing being a hassle, he does listen to you pretty intently. he knows you think roses on valentine’s day is a bit too cliche, so he opts to get you something like a mixed bouquet with ranunculuses, dailies, and lily of the valley’s.

✣ it’s sweet and very nagi. even in his own way, he’s able to show how much he adores you. you’re the only thing worth putting effort into in his eyes - all he demands is that you smother him in cuddles afterward.

⁀➷ “i told reo everything would be fine… why does he worry so much? i really like you, so i’m not gonna mess it up. everything is less annoying with you around. … did i say something weird?”

[lamentationsofalonelypotato]

@jollyhunter

Okay, I'm finally home and this was such a wonderful thing to read through! It made my day 😊

Girl, let me tell you I was also giggling the entire time I wrote this. This fic was so self indulgent because the reader IS me, one billion percent, the awkward anxious person who has no idea how to catch someone's attention 😆 But I love it resonated with you too (but I'm also sorry it took you back to your past trauma lol 😂)

I love your writing style and especially the way you add humor!! Like this had me already cracking up - Butcher and the boys x LotR, where’s my funfic, hm??

Oh goodness THANK YOU SO MUCH! 🥰 I literally laugh to myself the whole time I write and most of the time I'm scared no one else will get the jokes, but thank you that really means a lot 💗 But YES the subtle Eomer drop... if you haven't read As Tradition Dictates, you need to because it's so good and it's been living rent free in my head since I read it. And oh my word the cross over would be wild- Soldier Boy does act like an Orc sometimes, but we love him for it anyway 🤣

It’s a real struggle 😭

Amen it is 🫶🏻

Sneaky bastard - I feel like he’s only saying that because he’s afraid that he will fall for her. (Probably already has and is taking his chance now since she’d basically friend zoned him 😂)

He could be... 😏 You could be getting dangerously close to the truth there my friend 😉

EDIT: I FORGOT TO COMMENT ON THE FRIGGIN LOCUSTS SUPE - I’d pay to see that scene; Butcher and Soldier Boy running from a swarm of locusts because they can’t punch or shoot their way out as usual and making a deal to never talk about this embarrassing moment again 🤣

You know, I am so happy you pointed this out, because I really didn't think that in depth about what that scene would look like. And I hate locusts so I was like... what supe power would just be too much for me. BUT THAT IS SO FUNNY! I can see Butcher firing off like two shots into the swarm, while Ben kinda holds up his shield half-heartedly debating if it's worth it (it's not), and the reader and Hughie are already in the car with all the windows rolled up just watching it unfold. Even funnier would be her not letting Butcher or Ben into the car because she doesn't want any of the locusts to get in and she's shooing the two of them away. 😂

NOW WHERE‘S MY PART TWO?? I’M READY

Running joke I have is that I really can't write a one-shot to save my life... and this fic is no exception. I would love to make this a series (and I sort of accidentally plotted one out for this lol). The problem is I'm trying to finish up a soulmate AU series I started last year for Soldier Boy called If The Stars Wish It So and I have a prompt celebration running so I want to finish up those two things before I start a series based on this fic... BUT I do want to, because I love fake dating and I think that I could make this exceptionally awkward and funny lol.

But I am so happy that you liked this one sweetie and thank you so much for all the lovely feedback! 💜

Promise Not To Fall In Love With Me

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader and a little bit of Billy Butcher x f!reader

Prompt: "I find him very attractive." /"I'm standing right here"/ "I know."

Requested by: @angrydragon90

Tropes: Fake Dating, Pining.

Summary:  When you first joined Butcher's team the last thing you expected was to develop a crush on him, but after two years of pining, you get a proposition from the last person you'd expect to care.

Word Count: 5K

Warnings: I'm gonna label this 18+ just in case (I don't really think it is). Some cursing, Sexual innuendo, References to sex, Over glorification of a man's shirtless body (I'm not complaining) Reader is a little anxious/anxiety/socially awkward? Drug use/Drinking (Soldier Boy), Soldier Boy being Soldier Boy (He's a warning, we all know it and somehow still love him for it).

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person.

Main Masterlist

Dean Winchester Masterlist

Prompt Celebration Masterlist

A/N: This is the third fic for my prompt celebration! This one was requested the incredible @angrydragon90 💗 Had to do something with a little bit of Valentine's Day spirit, but I'm going to be honest, this one turned into something that I didn't expect... let me know what y'all think. I also was thinking about @zepskies fic As Tradition Dictates for the more *ahem* gratuitous descriptions of Butcher 😉

Butcher’s muscles rippled over his bare chest and broad shoulders with every swing of the mighty axe down to the earth. Each strike of the axe against wood sent chips of bark flickering in the air around him like sparks. Sweat rolled down his sun kissed skin curving in the dips of his muscular torso, along the tensing muscles of his back, and through the dusting of hair on his torso, before disappearing into the waistband of the dark jeans hung low on his hips. 

Heat kisses your cheeks and darkens the skin the longer you watch him and you bite your lip hard to keep the appreciative sigh of the scene in front of you at bay. But it does little to stop your eyes which rove over the rugged man chopping wood. 

No man his age should look that good. 

Butcher props one of his feet up on the tree stump he’s been using as a table oblivious to your attention, shouldering the axe for a moment to glance at the stack of firewood he’d chopped, looking like a mighty warrior surveying his lands. 

Your mind starts to slip into a fantasy of a shirtless Butcher riding horseback across a desolate plain, his dark hair long, and a sword strapped to his saddle commanding a group of riders behind him to his every whim. Before scooping you up onto his saddle to ride with him, his strong arm wrapped around your waist, and his face buried in the soft skin of your neck, his rough whisper in your ear a grating caress as he-

You clear your throat, cheeks darkening crimson, and take in a shaky breath to dissipate the daydream that usually starred in several of your fantasies. The same ones that probably came from the romantasy book that you’d brought along on this trip and were too embarrassed to read when anyone else was awake.

He raises a hand to wipe the sweat from his brow, shuffling it back through his hair that turns a chestnut brown in the light of the setting sun that flickered through the thick forest surrounding the small cabin you were all staying in.

Oh to be a drop of sweat.

You think mournfully, taking a long sip of your lemonade out of a brightly colored bendy straw, the same lemonade that you’d made in hopes of enticing Butcher over for a break.

It had worked, but only for twenty seconds.

Twenty glorious seconds that you got to bask in Butcher’s presence so close that you could smell the familiar cologne and the scent of sweat clinging to his skin while he drank the lemonade and you tried not to stare at his bare chest for too long. You hoped that Butcher thought the flush on your cheeks had everything to do with the heat and nothing to do with all the things you were imagining him doing to you. 

And then there had been an additional two seconds when Butcher smiled at you and said “Thanks poppet” in the swoon worthy accent of his that made your knees weak before he sauntered back over to the woodpile and you watched him go shamelessly. 

Hughie says something to Butcher you can’t hear, but it makes Butcher laugh. He throws his head back with a wide grin that makes you sigh to yourself again, hands tensing where they sit poised over the tangle of wires in your lap. 

You were supposed to be working on a new gadget to help grapple up buildings, one that you and Frenchie had designed together, but you were distracted by Butcher. 

You were always distracted by him. 

It had been three days since Butcher, Soldier Boy, Hughie, and you arrived at the cabin in the middle of nowhere after a mission went wrong. The specifics weren’t important, let’s just say that there was a miscommunication and what the four of you thought was a supe who could turn into a single locust, was actually able to turn into a swarm of locust so thick you couldn’t see an inch in front of your face. 

You had a sneaking suspicion that MM and Frenchie had something to do with the miscommunication, given how eager they had been to stay behind at headquarters and do paperwork, and the secretive smiles they had shared at the briefing before your team left.

But needless to say, none of you had been eager to live through a reenactment of the eighth plague and all decided to lay low to consider your options, while hoping the locust supe didn’t decimate all of the corn in the midwest.

You shudder remembering the crawl of the scratchy legs along your skin, the flapping of millions of wings like the beat of a drum, the crunch of locusts underfoot, and the low pitched hum of the swarm that vibrated so loud it made you feel your body shaking from the inside out. 

At this point I would have taken a swarm of guinea pigs.

The cabin wasn’t the worst place you’d stayed at in all the time you’d worked with Butcher. There was running water and several rooms inside including two bedrooms with lumpy pillows and mattresses with creaking springs, a living room with a sagging floral couch, and a threadbare kitchen with dusty cabinets and doors that fell off whenever someone tried to open one. 

Outside the cabin there was a small patch of wildflowers that fluttered in the strong wind that blew from the East, an overgrown garden where tomato plants, potatoes, and herbs grew without care, and a small front yard that was more of a grassy clearing. 

Sure the cabin had it’s quirks, but the real problem was that the four of you were trapped here in the middle of summer with a generator that only did so much for electricity, but had no air conditioning whatsoever, which meant it was cooler to sit outside on the porch than inside the sweltering cabin. 

Overall, it had been three days of nothing, but listening to Soldier Boy bitch about the lack of extracurricular activities, three days of nothing but hearing the soft chuckle under Hughie’s breath when he texted Annie, and three days of nothing but you lusting after a man who was twice your age chopping wood.

Why was he chopping wood when it was so hot and none of you needed it… You had no idea, but you figured that the universe was finally throwing you a bone because you got to watch him do it.

The porch was cooler than sitting inside. There were two creaky rocking chairs that faced the overgrown “front yard” that was more of a clearing and the breeze did weave under the overhang of the roof to wick the sweat that gathered at the back of your neck, but the problem was, it was impossible for you to feel anything but warm, especially with what was unfolding in front of you. 

The weather isn’t the only thing heating up.

You think to yourself watching Butcher lean down to pick up another piece of wood, admiring the way his worn dark jeans cup his muscular ass.

Fuck, I’m just as bad as Soldier Boy. 

The truth was, you’d been crushing on Butcher for the better part of two years since the moment the two of you met on your first day when you’d tripped and dropped the giant pile of blueprints you were carrying to your desk and he was the only one who stopped to help you pick them up. 

After Homelander had been stripped of his powers and exposed for the narcissistic psychotic freak he was, you’d started working at Supe Affairs, thinking that it was the perfect way for you to make a difference in a world reeling from the revelation. It had shaken quite a few people to know that the so-called heroes they looked up to were in fact just as crooked as a line drawn by an elephant on a tricycle. 

But you liked your job… sometimes. 

Sure, the pay sucked, the benefits were dismal and the hours were long, but you didn’t care about any of that. You felt like you were making a difference, using the engineering degree that your dad had insisted on for something other than trying to figure out how to build a bridge that withstood the force of a punch from someone as strong as Homelander. 

And you hadn’t meant to develop a crush on William Butcher of all people, you swore that each day to yourself, but it happened without warning. He was nice to you, he always had your back on missions, and sometimes when you were working on something after hours on a mission- like the gadget in your lap- Butcher would sit with you while everyone else slept, nursing a glass of whatever it was he had, and he always made you feel like a valued member of the team.

Yes, he might be a little rough around the edges, but you liked that about him, that he didn’t pull punches, rather he told it like it was. It was refreshing in the world you lived in when everyone else was so afraid of offending someone that they just kept their mouths shut. 

But the problem was that you were younger than him and a little inexperienced. 

Well… a lot inexperienced. You’d never been in a relationship before, never really done anything before because there wasn’t time when you were in school getting your degree, not to mention you had spent the last two years imagining yourself in a relationship with a man who didn’t know you existed.

That might be a little harsh, he knew you existed, obviously, but rather he didn’t see you as anything more than a teammate or at least like a little sister. The nicknames that he called you were all some form of “kiddo” or “poppet.” Nothing like the things you’d read about men calling the women they loved in books or heard in movies. 

The most experience you had in the realm of love and relationships was binge watching Sex and The City (you could quote it by heart), flipping through Cosmopolitan Magazine and other articles about love on the internet like they were opioids, and reading through romance novels reverently as if they held the secrets of the universe. 

Not to mention the draft of the romance novel on your computer… but you’d go to the grave before anyone ever saw that, and if they did see it you’d take them with you. 

Reading about relationships was easier than having one, at least that was what you told yourself to feel better. It also didn’t help that you’d seen two out of three sisters married with kids, with the third one getting married in a few weeks and you without even a shadow of a date for the wedding.

That meant you would be stuck at the awkward reject table again with your weird fourth cousin who always came on to you and tried to show you the rooster tattoo he had on his hip bone, your dad’s brother who cleaned his dentures in public after he ate and his wife who always asked you what you were “doing” with your life and curled her lip up in distaste no matter what you said, and the gaggle of their ungrateful children who were always sticky for some reason and chewed with their mouths open while spilling food all over the table like cavemen.

Sitting there with them made facing the locust supe more appealing.

But even with the pressure of trying to find someone, anyone to take, you couldn’t muster up the courage to tell Butcher how you felt about him. 

Butcher glances over as if he can sense you and you immediately drop your eyes to the bundle of gears and wires in your lap pretending to fiddle with something that doesn’t need to be fixed.

Yes, because that’s the way I’m going to win him over, by making absolutely no eye contact. Perfect, masterful. What can go wrong?

What the books, magazines, tv shows, and movies didn’t prepare you for was how to find the courage to talk to someone of the opposite sex without feeling like your tongue was going to drop out of your mouth or like you were going to throw up. 

You wait a few beats until you’re sure that he’s no longer looking at you before you raise your head to watch Butcher again. 

Ben chuckles under his breath where he sits beside you in the other rocking chair, leaning back with one of his hands behind his head. His muscles tense in the black t-shirt as he adjusts his arm. 

“What?” You ask him. 

He exhales a long and obnoxious cloud of foul smelling smoke from the joint he has in his hand. “I think you’re a hypocrite.”

“And why is that?”

“Because you’re out here eye-fucking that asshole and you yell at me for staring at you.” He chuckles with a wide smirk as he takes another hit from the blunt.

How can he smoke that? It’s like 100 degrees out here!

“I am not!” You reply as loudly as you dare, glancing over to Butcher to make sure that he didn’t hear Ben’s comment, anxiety prickling along the back of your neck, but he’s still talking to Hughie about something. “And you don’t just stare at me! You come up behind me like some gremlin out of hell, with your big hands and-”

“We both know how much you like the attention doll.”

“I do not!” Your cheeks flare bright red. 

The only downside to working on Butcher’s team was sitting directly next to you. When you found out that you’d be working with Soldier Boy, one of your dad’s favorite heroes, you were excited to meet him, and then you had and he turned into another giant disappointment. He was loud, brash, short-tempered, rude, and was always either ogling you, coming on to you, smoking something, or drinking. 

You supposed it could be worse. You didn’t hate him, and you got along with him, but he was always around. The plus side was that Ben was the one of the only people you didn’t have a hard time talking to.

Yes, he was attractive, but his particular lifestyle didn’t appeal to you and for that reason whatever nerves you had about talking to attractive men of the opposite sex evaporated when it came to Ben. 

It was unfortunate that such a skill was wasted on him of all people.

“I just-” You hesitate, eyes dropping back down to the grappling device in your lap, not sure why you’re about to admit this to Soldier Boy when you haven’t been able to admit it to anyone else. 

Probably because I’m sick of singing the line from Frozen “conceal don’t feel” over and over in my head.

“I find him extremely attractive.” You mumble on a shaky breath. 

“I’m sitting right here.” The frown in Ben’s voice is prominent, but it only makes you roll your eyes at him. 

“I know.” Your eyebrows furrow together. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“Why are you looking at him when you could have my full attention.” He leans forward, dark hair falling forward into his eyes, mouth pulling up in a confident smirk. "I mean there's nothing else to fucking do, might as well do me."

Your cheeks flush with his words, but you tilt your head to the side to study him, eyes slipping over his rugged features. Tracing over the neatly trimmed beard on his cheeks, the brilliant green eyes that seemed to glow, the way his muscular body filled out his black t-shirt and blue jeans, the soft dusting of freckles that contrasted the hardness of the man he was flecked over his skin, and his full lips that are curved up in a sinful smirk that would make even the strongest woman crumble. 

But not you. Ben was… Ben. He was brash, obnoxious, handsy, impatient, and disrespectful. 

At least, that’s what you thought.

Sure you didn’t work with him often, but you believed you had a pretty good grasp on the kind of person he was. You did, right?

“You’re not my type Benny.” Your eyes flick back to the project in your lap, moving your fingers deftly through the wires of the internal mechanism.

Ben recoils at the use of his nickname, but he recovers with a low chuckle. “Don’t call me that and I’m everybody's type.”

“Not mine. I don’t like supes.”

You weren’t sure if that was 100% true. You liked Kimiko. What you meant to say was that you didn’t like supes like him. Supes that used his powers without care for the consequences, Supes like Homelander who didn’t give a shit who got hurt as long as the job was done. 

And you weren’t a supe, which meant that if you were with a supe there was always the possibility of you dying during sex or dying before you had sex in the first place. Your job also presented the possibility of you dying before you’d had sex, but you weren’t going to let that hold you back.

“But Butcher has-” Ben begins to say.

“Temporary powers. Not all the time.” You correct, unable to stop your eyes from drifting back over to where Butcher has begun to start swinging the axe again. “And look at him. Fuck, he’s over there like Paul Bunyan, rugged, chopping wood-” You sigh continuing to watch the man who probably has no idea you exist.

Ben rolls his eyes. “I could do that.”

You don’t pay Ben any attention, because Butcher is bending over again and you bite the inside of your cheek hard. 

Ben sits there for another few beats watching you watch Butcher. The wind chimes that hang above your heads jingle merrily as the breeze picks up once more bringing the smell of the wild flowers and wet earth from the forest surrounding the cabin. 

“You know I could help you.” Ben says slowly.

Your eyes flick back to Ben from Butcher in confusion. “Help me?”

What is he talking about? Does he think he can figure out how to fix the grapple gun? The other day he couldn’t figure out how to open the automatic trunk of a car and he just ripped the trunk door right off.

“Get him.” Ben nods his head in Butcher’s direction, but you’re still confused.

“How?”

And why? Why does Soldier Boy want to help me of all people?

“Well, I could help you make him jealous.” Ben leans towards you, his eyes sweeping once over you as he does, lingering too long on your chest and the edge of the jean shorts you were wearing.

“And how would you do that?”

“Well for starters you could come sit on my lap baby, see how you like it.” Ben winks. “Take me for a little ride.”

“Pass.” You roll your eyes. 

“Oh I see you want to have a more advanced lesson.” He smiles, scooting his chair towards yours, a dull scrape of wood on wood, so now his knee is touching yours. “He could catch an earful of us tonight. I’d be happy to fuck you. It’d give me something to do.” Ben takes another hit of his joint, the smoke making you scrunch your nose in distaste, while he gives you an appreciative once over. “Fuck knows the only entertainment I’ve had for three fucking days is my hand and it would be good to have a nice tight-“

“No thanks.” You interrupt, face flushing when you imagine what he was about to say.

Ben stiffens in surprise. “What?”

“I’m good.” You shrug. “I’m gonna get him the old fashioned way.”

The same old fashioned way that I’ve been using for the past two years and had absolutely no results.

“And what way is that? Pining after him and hoping that one day he’ll finally notice you?” Ben scoffs. “I can see how well that’s working for you doll-face. How long have you been working with him?”

“Two years-”

“Fuck, two years?” Ben sputters. “You should just tell him that you want him to fuck you.” 

“That won’t work.”

Ben’s face scrunches in confusion, the joint clasped in between his thumb and forefinger forgotten. “Why the hell not?”

“Because-” You glance down at your hands, thumb running along the jagged edge of the grappling hook slightly embarrassed. The last thing you wanted to tell Soldier Boy was that you were a virgin. The guy would mock you endlessly. “Because I’m younger than him and he’s-”

He’s experienced. 

“So? You think that he hasn’t thought about fucking you?” Ben takes a long sip from the whiskey sitting beside his chair. “He’d be lucky to have a little piece like you.”

You blink in surprise. It was the closest to a compliment that Ben had ever given you. He did tend to compliment your figure whenever you were around, but you usually ignored that because he did that to everyone. 

Truthfully, the thought of dating Ben didn’t appeal to you at all, but the thought of using him to make Butcher jealous was not a terrible one. And at this point, you didn’t have anything to lose. 

Well… except THAT, but you wanted it to be special, at least that’s what you’d always told yourself.

You sigh, a little frustrated, watching Butcher out of the corner of your eye swing the axe in a glorious arch to the earth. You weren’t sure how to get Butcher’s attention. You’d tried the usual things…

Leaving the room as soon as he walked in to avoid a conversation.

Gone completely mute when he asked you a question.

Pretended you didn’t see him whenever he walked into a room.

Tried to bring him coffee, but then chickened out and drank his and yours and then immediately had to go to the bathroom to avoid shitting your pants while having heart palpitations.

Basically the social anxiety was working wonders on the office romance you wanted so badly. 

“Ben?” You say tentatively, hands tightening on the contraption in your lap. At this rate you were never going to fix it and Butcher was going to have to figure out how to fly. 

“Yes, gorgeous?” Ben raises an eyebrow. The blunt is between his lips now and he’s looking at you curiously.

“If we did pretend to be…” You swallow nervously. 

“Fucking?” He leans forward eagerly, eyes twinkling with interest.

Well… I’ve never understood what it meant when someone wrote “his eyes darkened” until this very moment. 

“Dating” You correct holding up a finger.

Does his mind always go to the gutter?

You remember everything you think you know about Ben.

Yes. Yes it does.

Ben leans back with a frown. “I don’t date.”

“Well it wouldn’t be real! You’d just be helping me make him jealous and it would be nice to have a little practice maybe…”

“Practice?” He looks confused. It wasn’t the first time he had in this conversation or within the last five minutes, but like hell you were about to admit without at least one drink to Soldier Boy the extent of your dating life.

“Yeah. I’m not the best at talking to people or-”

“You’re talking just fine right now.”

“You’re different.”

“Why is that?”

“Because you annoy me and I don’t know you’re easier to talk to for some reason!” 

“Thanks.” Ben says dryly. 

By now all the anxious energy has begun to pop and crackle against your skin at the thought of what the two of you could be doing and at the thought of you two actually pulling this off and you having a shot with Butcher. Not just a shot in hell, a real shot.

“But if you’re serious about helping me get him-“ You continue.

“I was.”

It was odd that he was the one who had suggested this in the first place, and even weirder that he didn’t seem hesitant at all to be doing this. 

Maybe he thinks that we’re going to have sex. Your throat tightened at the thought, eyes widening, your nerve endings electrifying with anxiety. Oh holy fuck what if he thinks that if we do this he’ll get to do whatever he wants to me?

You clear your throat, heart beating just a little bit harder in your chest. The entire situation was making you regret the extra cup of coffee you had this morning. “What exactly would I have to do?” You don’t recognize your voice. It comes out a little more wobbly and just a little more tentative than it was. 

You didn’t know what Ben was expecting you to do and you didn’t want to say yes, only for him to force you into sleeping with him like he’d suggested earlier, the most you'd thought the two of you would do is just make out a little-

Oh holy fuck then we’d have to kiss and I don’t know if I’m a good kisser and he’s definitely kissed more than one person not to mention he’s-

The thought made you flush to the roots of your hair. 

Ben hesitates, eyeing you and you wonder if he can hear the deranged monologue inside your head or if he can hear just how hard your heart was beating. You hoped not. 

“You wouldn’t have to do anything, doll. I’m not going to force you to do anything that makes you uncomfortable.” There’s something genuine in his eyes when he answers your question, something that you’d never noticed before. 

Your mouth drops open in surprise. 

It wasn’t that you believed that Ben was that kind of man, but rather that what he just said to you might have been the most caring thing that he’d ever uttered in front of you. He was the last person that you’d expect to care about someone being uncomfortable or care if someone else was okay with everything that was happening in the bedroom.

Maybe I don’t know him as well as I think I do.

In all honesty you only knew the way Ben acted, you didn’t know anything about his life. The man kept his cards closer to his chest than a well-seasoned card player and his poker face, forget it. You couldn’t crack that combination even if you wanted to. 

Everything else you'd heard about him was through the grapevine of gossip at work. None of it was first hand.

Ben sighs and shakes his head at you as if he’s a little annoyed with himself for saying that out loud. “But I still think it would be easier if you just told him that you wanted him to fuck you. Would’ve worked on me.”

“I’m not good at that sort of thing.”

And it was true. You could take down a target, diffuse a bomb in less than ten seconds with a thin mint and a bobby pin, but saying something out loud like that to something else made you feel nauseous.

Ben hesitates again and in his hesitation the anxiety and embarrassment starts to come soaring back into your chest.

You were asking Soldier Boy, Soldier Boy, to pretend to date you so Billy Butcher would fall in love with you. 

Well kids, this must be what rock bottom feels like. I might as well just pray that the locusts come back to take me away. 

“Fine.” Ben states. 

“Really?” Your eyes widen.

He shrugs, but doesn’t answer.

“We’d have to have rules.” You blurt, and Ben makes a face.

“Rules? Never been too good with those, Sweetheart.”

“And I’d need you to promise that you wouldn’t-” 

You lose your train of thought in the wind chimes that rattle over your head and the sound of Butcher’s laugh.

“Wouldn’t?” He arches an eyebrow.

“Lose control.”

Honestly, sometimes you were a little afraid of Ben. You’d never say that out loud or admit it, but he was stronger than Homelander.

You knew Ben's reputation around the office- heard the hushed whispers of the women in the break room who said he was the best fuck of their lives, heard the horror stories of what he did to his old team, and had seen first hand what his temper was like. You also knew about his powers and worried that Ben might have a little bit of a control problem or at the very least anger management issues.

“I’m not going to fucking hurt you if that’s what you think.” Ben growls, his eyes narrowing at your insinuation. “I’m not some fucking monster, doll.”

“I don’t think you’re a monster Ben.” You sigh. “I just- I don’t have powers and you’re kinda strong and I-.” You take a deep breath to steady your voice. “I don’t think that you’d hurt me on purpose. But-”

Ben’s hand comes out to touch your chin, tilting your gaze up to him and stopping the bicycle of babbling you were about to ride around the block. Your eyes widen slightly with the contact, you weren’t used to people touching you, certainly not like this. 

Keep it together… 

“I wouldn’t hurt you by accident either.” Ben’s green eyes are focused on yours, and you can see just a sliver of emotion behind them that you can’t identify. “But if we’re going to do this you gotta promise me one thing.”

“What?” Your voice comes out like a squeak.

“You’ve got to promise not to fall in love with me.” He sends you a saucy wink that makes you want to punch the strongest man on earth, instead you settle for pushing him back from you.

But you’re not prepared for the wave of disappointment you feel when he lets go of your chin. 

“I’m not in any danger of that Benny. You’re not half as smooth as you think you are.” You start to lean back in your chair, but Ben reaches out to grab your wrist, his touch surprisingly gentle, the contact burning through your body, as he pulls you forward, so close you can smell his cologne. Somehow it's something that smells classic and modern at the same time, a hint of spice that tickles your nose and makes your throat tight. 

His voice lowers into a purr that vibrates through his chest, his next words expelled on a warm breath that weaves through the air between the two of you. 

“Sweetheart, you’re about to find out just how smooth I am.” 

What have I gotten myself into?

A/N: Again, not what I was expecting, but I really love this one y'all and I probably laughed way too hard at bits when I was writing it.

Thank you so much for reading! Likes, Reblogs, and Comments are not required, but are always appreciated! I love hearing what y'all think! 😊 If you'd liked to be added to my taglist please let me know!

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How the TWST Boys Spend Valentine's Day w/You!

The Third Years

Trey Clover

This should be a day in which Trey gets a thank you break for all he has done for you and the rest of Heartslabyul. There is supposed to be a wonderful bakery in Foothill Town, and though it's not a complete break away from sweets, at least Trey doesn't have to bake. The both of you share a chocolate cake, which will lead to some staining of the face. Trey offers to clean the chocolate off you...the same way you two cleaned the plate.

Cater Diamond

Has a little bit of social media envy around this time of the year. He already planned on giving you little gifts anyway, but it would be nice to record the whole thing, too. All of your delightful reactions will be posted online for everyone to see, comment, and heart on Cater's MagiCam page. Cater may not be the mushy type, but you're gonna change that when you surprise him with a cheek kiss on live.

Leona Kingscholar

Doesn't believe he has time for holiday of love cheer. He's about to learn that you do. You don't have to do anything too active. Just spending time under the NRC garden trees is enough. Leona lets you play with his hair as long as you don't make it all messy. Oh, you move his hair just enough that it still remains perfectly...unkempt as it usually is. Then, his forehead is shown just enough for some cheeky, soft, and cute peaks.

Vil Schoenheit

Not the one to disappoint his date on the Day of Romance. He shall take you to the finest place in Foothill Town for dinner and he shall gift you the finest present he can think of to make you smile. All of this to show you how much he cares for you. Then, as you take a fine walk along the pier, gazing up at the brightest of stars, the two of you will share a lovely kiss of romance.

Rook Hunt

Knows how to make your perfect Valentine's Day (I mean, are we surprised?) Whatever your favorite things in the world are, he will deliver them. Wherever place you wanna go, he will take you there. Whatever your favorite song is, he will sing it. Your dream place to be kissed, as long as he has your consent, he shall make your dream come true.

Idia Shroud

Not the one to go public on the holiday of love (in which he most likely loathes). He's already been trapped by capitalism. He doesn't need another reason to go deeper. You can tell he's not in the mood to be alone as he asks you join a server and a play a few rounds to distract him from the red and pink heart fodder. All's harmless in an MMO farming game, right? He must've forgot that the game had a kissing feature.

Malleus Draconia

Has been aware of the holiday, but has never gotten to experience it for himself (as he hasn't had many chances to celebrate). He's overheard Lilia gushing over how much of a romantic you are, and Malleus can't ignore that information. But what can he do to express his wishes to be yours for the day...or maybe more after. At night, when you least expect he, he poofs over to Ramshackle, violin in tow. The sweet music captures you immediately. Malleus will float up to your window, prepared to receive your sentiment. A simple, yet thankful kiss on his forehead is enough for Malleus's chest to thump more than his heart could ever muster before.

Lilia Vanrouge

He's been so busy with...other things that Valentine's Day has been one of the holidays that slipped his mind until he arrived at NRC. His last few attempts at getting into the holiday spirit were...attempts. Now that he has you, his platonic cards to his friends and love cards for his family are top notch. How can he ever thank you? A kiss on the hand, perhaps? He was raised in the traditional ways after all.

[burreauxsss]

its over, im sorry

background: y/n a wag for the chiefs who is dating travis kelce of 3 years finds out he cheated on her. she assures herself that she'd never watch the nfl nor date another nfl player, until a convincing quarterback hits her dms.

(all pics from pinterest/ all tweets are fake this is a 2 part series fyi)

notes: posting twice in a day because my x account gets unsuspended tomorrow won't he do it!!! anyways warnings: none??

joe burrow x reader x ex!kelce smau

duexmoi

❤️ 420,494 💬 33,000

Liked by: tmz

duexmoi: ladies!! what do we think?

username_1: bro she deserves so much better.

username_2: i hope she upgrades

username_3: about time.

username_4: i need to hear about her experience with him fr.

username_5: my favorite wag????? seriously!!

*load more comments*

y/n_handle

❤️ 84,100 💬 5,000

Liked by: yourbsf and others

y/n_handle: the world is finally healing.

username_6: wym by that..

username_7: so its healing because of you leaving that man.. oh!

username_8: rule 1, dont date a athlete, got it.

username_9: you deserve better.

*load more comments*

joeyb_9

❤️ 755,111 💬 87,915

Liked by: lahjay10 bengals and others

joeyb_9: keep fighting.

lahjay_10: joey b is back.

bengals: we missed 9.

username_10: yall sucked this week, pull it together against kansas city.

username_11: that man was scared and we all know it.

username_12: who dey as always!

*load more comments*

y/n_handle 📍kansas city, mo

❤️ 82,100 💬 6,987

Liked by: yourbsf

y/n_handle: with yourbsf

username_13: my algorithm is messy since that tweet.

username_14: i wish he wouldve just broke off the engagement and been done with it.

username_15: shes so pretty, he fumbled.

username_16: her friend is a bengals fan, is she going with her to the game this sunday?

username_17: i fear travis is beating himself up about this rn.

username_18: who did he even cheat on her with, thats the million dollar question.

*load more comments*

bengals 📍kansas city, mo

❤️ 900,777 💬 120,337

Liked by: lahjay_10 joeyb_9 and others

bengals: business trip.

username_19: if this business trip doesnt involve a dub then i dont know what.

username_20: joe actually looks nice today.

username_21: hes so fine its unreal.

username_22: chiefs been deadass silent on insta since last week..

username_23: travis talking 💩 on his podcast as usual.

username_24: yk what would be crazy... travis's ex showing up to see travis lose.

*load more comments*

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

conversation between joe and y/n on instagram dms

joeyb_9: saw one of your pics, you're very beautiful.

y/n_handle: thank you. 🤍

joeyb_9: i also see you're travis's ex.

y/n_handle: yeah, crazy story. i know you hate kansas city but

joeyb_9: i heard what happened, therefore ive always seen you on tv and loved how well you carry yourself.

y/n_handle: if this is you asking me out, i promised myself i wouldnt date another athlete.

joeyb_9: maybe it is, but i promise you if this "stage" doesnt work you can block me and we'll forget about eachother. deal?

y/n_handle: so basically this is a talking stage.

joeyb_9: i mean we've dmd eachother every once in awhile to congratulate eachother so... we know about eachother.

y/n_handle: deal.

y/n_handle: i need to admit this also, you're very handsome.

joeyb_9: i appreciate it.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

y/n_handle posted a story

caption: im here for the orange team. w/ yourbsf

duexmoi

❤️ 350,823 💬 12,920

Liked by: tmz and others

duexmoi: blind alert!! according to a spectator fan at the bengals vs chiefs game cincinnati bengals quarterback joe burrow ended up flirting with travis kelces ex?!?!?!?

now this is awkward after y/n just confirmed the cheating rumors with the engagement speculations.

username_25: this has to be crazy

username_26: she deserves all the love she can get.

username_27: and the bengals won?? oh honey i wouldve hard launched right then and there.

username_28: her bsf is a bengals wag so that might be a connection.

username_29: you could tell travis was pissed as hell that his ex girl showed up lmaoo.

username_30: long distance might be even worse for her..

*load more comments*

y/n_handle posted a story

caption: flirting with the don julio

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

conversation between joe and y/n

joeyb_9

❤️ 667,009 💬 78,403

Liked by: bengals lahjay10 y/n_handle and others

joeyb_9: another week, another dub

bengals: hes him!

lahjay_10: f the chiefs.

username_31: y/n liking this post might be insane knowing whats going on..

username_32: i love jamarr's comment so much lmaoo

username_33: travis kelce crying in a corner rn??

username_34: joe has to have the most insane villain arc ever to be hitting travis kelces ex fiance

username_35: kermit 🤮 who dey!

*load more comments*

note: crazy ending, possible friend zone, possible rejection idek... sike yall know damn well

[embershroud108]

Thinking again about how the last we see of Isha it’s from Vi’s perspective, not Jinx’s, and what an interesting, and seemingly odd choice that is given how much closer Isha was to Jinx.

And after mulling it over for awhile I kind of feel that Isha is actually the linchpin of Vi’s whole arc in season 2, perhaps even more so than she is for Jinx.

I saw someone awhile back point out that Isha appears in Jinx’s life right after Vi officially joins the enforcers and makes the commitment to hunt her sister down (the sister who she in fact disowns). Isha basically takes up the loving, protective sister role with Jinx that Vi chooses to abdicate at the beginning of the season. Jinx even states (or at least suggests) that her relationship with Isha is what she wishes her relationship with Vi could have been.

When Vi crashes out between acts 1 and 2 she completely loses that protector aspect that’s been so central to her character. She basically becomes just a mindlessly violent brute that fights because she has nothing else left to do. Isha is the vehicle through which Vi regains that protector role. Not only does Vi directly protect Isha in eps 3 and 5, but Isha indirectly reconciles the sisters by allowing Vi to see Jinx’s humanity and (indirectly) reminding her that Jinx is still her sister.

And then at the end of ep6 one of the last things Isha sees is Vi holding Jinx back, Vi *protecting* Jinx again. It’s as if Isha took on the responsibility that Vi had forgotten about or tried to get rid of until Vi was ready to pick it back up again.

Then, in ep8, after Vi’s striking dream-vision of Isha, the first thing Vi does when she wakes up is go defend Jinx to Caitlyn.

[bitchinbarzal]

What’s Valentine’s | B Faber

summary: eden has started asking questions about love, about her mom, and brock can’t hide it from her anymore.

-

“Daddy, what’s Valentine’s?”

Brock looks up from where he’s tying Eden’s shoelaces, his fingers pausing over the soft white laces of her sneakers. She stares at him with wide eyes, her little head tilted in curiosity, a heart-shaped sticker stuck to her cheek from school.

“It’s a day about love” he says gently, smoothing his hand over the knot in her shoe before glancing up at her again “People celebrate the people they care about”

Eden frowns “Like you and me?”

He smiles, heart aching in the way it always does when she looks at him like that—like he’s her whole world, even when his own feels like it’s been in pieces for a long time.

“Yeah, like you and me”

She seems to accept that answer, hopping off the bench by the door and grabbing her coat. But before she reaches for the zipper, she stops, small hands curling into the fabric.

“Did you and Mommy do Valentine’s?”

Brock swallows around the tightness in his throat. He should’ve known this question was coming. Eden’s five now, old enough to see how other kids at school have two parents, old enough to notice what’s missing. She never knew a world with Y/N in it, not really. But Brock did. And every February, every red and pink display in store windows, every heart-shaped candy on shelves—it reminds him.

“Yeah” he says, voice quieter this time “We did”

Eden climbs onto the couch, sitting cross-legged and waiting for him to say more. Her patience reminds him so much of Y/N that it physically hurts sometimes. She was always so good at that—waiting him out, giving him the space to get the words right.

“What did you do?” she asks, picking at the hem of her sweater.

Brock exhales slowly, settling beside her “Well” he starts “Mommy loved Valentine’s Day. She thought it was silly, but she loved it anyway. Every year, she’d get me a card, even though she knew I’d probably forget to get one for her” He smiles at the memory, the teasing way Y/N used to shake her head at him before pulling a card from behind her back.

Eden giggles “You forgot?”

He nods “Almost every time. But I always made it up to her”

“How?”

“I’d surprise her with something. One time, I made her breakfast in bed—pancakes shaped like hearts”

She gasps, delighted “Did she like them?”

Brock laughs softly “She loved them. Even the ones that looked more like blobs than hearts”

Eden leans against him, resting her head against his arm “What else?”

Brock closes his eyes for a second, letting the memories settle over him like a warm, aching blanket “One year, i wrote her a letter”

Eden lifts her head “Like a love letter?”

He nods, his throat tight “Yeah, like a love letter. I told her how much she meant to me. How I never really believed in all that Valentine’s stuff before her, but she made me want to. She made me want a lot of things”

Eden is quiet for a long time before she whispers “Do you miss her?”

There it is—the question that breaks him every time.

“Yeah, baby. I miss her every day”

She reaches for his hand, her tiny fingers wrapping around his “I wish I knew her”

Brock squeezes her hand “I wish you did too. But you know what?”

“What?”

“She’s still here”

Eden’s brow furrows “Where?”

“In you” he says, tapping her nose lightly “You have her kindness. Her patience. The way you wrinkle your nose when you’re thinking really hard”

She giggles, rubbing her nose like she can wipe away the evidence.

“You love as big as she did” Brock continues “And that’s the most important thing of all”

Eden is quiet again, and when she finally speaks, it’s so soft he almost misses it “Does love always hurt?”

His heart clenches. He wishes he could tell her no, that love is all soft edges and warm places. But she’s already learned, in her own way, that love can be loss too.

He exhales, running a hand over his face “Love is the best thing in the world, Eden. But when you love someone, really love them, it means you might have to feel hurt too. Because to open your heart to love is to open it to pain”

Eden looks up at him, eyes big and solemn “Is it worth it?”

Brock doesn’t hesitate “Always”

She nods, considering his words like the thoughtful little girl she is. Then she scoots closer, pressing her face into his side.

“I love you, Daddy”

Brock wraps his arms around her, holding her close as he presses a kiss to her hair.

“I love you too, baby. Always”

[abyssalwavezz]

zayne smut and i need it neowwwwwww do whatever you want with the plot

Impulse Control

Author's note: I know who you are anon, and this one is for you <3 that's all I've got to say LOL also if you like kpop, check out my kpop page @ta3mint bc I am trying to revive it after such a long break lol also fun fact...I think this is one of if not the longest fic I have ever written. So yeah...send in your LADS requests. It's good to be back, ya filthy animals.

Contains: Zayne x MC/YN, consent king Zayne, jealous/down bad Zayne, explicit sexual scenes with unprotected P in V (use protection irl pls), fingering (fem receiving), MC briefly on top, relatively vanilla missionary (but it’s a classic okay?) and somewhat vague hints at Zayne and MC lore if you squint

Warnings: Minors for the love of God, pls do not interact!! Sexually explicit content, adult themes, cursing, etc. and as always...no proofreading <3

Word Count: 7,872

It was no surprise that Akso Hospital was winning an award for their exemplary service to Linkon City. What was a bit of a surprise though, was Zayne taking the initiative to ask you to come to the banquet with him. He could be so hard to read sometimes, and though of course he could be thoughtful, this seemed to be a direct request, even for him.

You couldn't help but reread the texts from earlier, your heart and your mind racing in tandem.

Zayne☃️: How has your day been so far? Have you been staying hydrated? You often forget to drink enough water when you are busy.

Me: Dr. Zayne, do you text all your patients and remind them of their hydration levels?

Zayne☃️: Only the most forgetful ones.

Me: You mean there's more than one? And here I thought I was special :(

Zayne☃️: Don't fret. You are, in fact, the only patient who I perform this service for.

Me: Well in that case...I should probably go drink some water in between training sessions.

Zayne☃️: Before you go, I wanted to ask you something.

Me: Oh? I am listening (and hydrating as we speak)

Zayne☃️: The hospital is receiving a service award tonight. There will be a banquet. I was hoping you might want to come with me. After all, you have served Linkon as much as I or any of the other medical staff has. It is only fair that you are my plus one. If you want to be, of course.

Me: I would love to, Dr. Zayne. One question though...

Zayne☃️: Yes?

Me : Will there be dessert? 🧁

You had hoped the little joke about dessert would take your mind off of...everything. But it hadn't worked. You were still sitting in your desk chair, knees pulled tightly against your chest.

What did this invitation mean? Did Zayne...no. No way. There was no way he was inviting you because he saw you as something other than a friend and a patient. He said it himself, that it was only fair to invite you due to your service as a hunter.

How about you, though? What did you see Zayne as? You definitely would like to be more than friends. You couldn't help but fall for him after seeing him so often nowadays. He was everything you could have ever dreamed of in a man. But did he know about your feelings? Did he notice the amount of time you spent watching him work or study instead of focusing on your own work or training material in front of you? Did he notice you watching him even more closely during your workout sessions?

You swallowed the lump forming in your throat.

Anyway. It was time to get ready now, and the part you dreaded most was here... Choosing what to wear.

You didn't really have many formal outfits to choose from, and you felt like the ones you did have were worn too many times. Right about now, you were wishing that Zayne had asked you earlier than the day of so you could've had more time to prepare. But honestly, would it have made a difference? Procrastinating was one of your favorite sports.

Eventually, you settled on your favorite dress.

Putting it on turned into somewhat of a chore, though. It didn't fit quite the same way as you remembered... but it had been a while since you last wore it.

Thankfully, it went on without any damage to the dress, but you couldn't help but pull at the fabric at the bottom of the dress. It was also a bit shorter than you remembered, it seemed.

And was this slit in the side always there?

Never mind that, it would have to do. There was no more time, and you still had to do your hair and makeup, as well as put on accessories to go with the dress. To be honest, you were a bit out of your comfort zone at the moment.

"Tonight better go well," you muttered to yourself.

~

The sudden noise from your phone caused you to stop what you were doing with your hair.

Grabbing it with a gloved hand, you immediately saw the text from Zayne letting you know he was waiting outside to pick you up.

You placed the last bobby pin in your hair and gently pushed your earrings in, then grabbed your phone and clutch before heading out the door.

As you passed by the mirror on your wall, you checked your makeup one last time, too.

Was it too much? It was a formal event, so you assumed you were to look the part. Ultimately you decided you looked fine, and part of you wished that Zayne would like it, too.

Oh, who were you kidding. You really hoped that Zayne would like it.

The sounds of your heels meeting the hard floor echoed throughout your apartment building until you got into the elevator. Once you were inside, you sent Zayne a quick text letting him know you were on the way.

Ding!

The elevator alerted you to let you know that it had arrived on the first floor. Quickly, you stepped out and into the parking lot, not wanting to be the cause of potentially being late.

After a quick scan of the nearby parking spaces, you saw his car a short distance away. You made your way over, cursing yourself for choosing these particular heels that were already causing foot pain.

As he saw you approach, he stepped out of his car and walked around to the passenger side, placing his hand on the door handle. He was wearing a traditional suit, accompanied by his glasses that he seemed to save for special occasions or work.

"Wowww, Dr. Zayne. No lab coat today? And doesn't your car have a button to open the doors, even when you're inside?"

"Would it still count as chivalry if I were to only press a button?"

He gave a small smile and pulled the door handle, stepping aside to let you in the car.

You smiled back, gently sitting down so as not to disturb your hair and dress.

As you moved past him, Zayne took a deep breath through his nose, closing his eyes briefly before forcing them back open.

"You okay, Zayne? Am I wearing too much perfume? Or even worse...do I stink?"

Zayne shook his head and smiled once more.

"No and no, of course not. I like what you are wearing."

You nodded, satisfied with his prompt answer which caused your cheeks to burn.

Zayne closed your door and walked back around to his. He sat down and buckled himself in, motioning for you to do the same.

"The banquet is in an event hall not far from here. There will be some speeches that may bore you, by the way. This is your last chance to back out."

It was your turn to shake your head.

"Not a chance. It took me so long to get ready, I have to see this through. Besides, I was glad you thought to invite me."

Zayne turned the steering wheel to back out of his parking space, carefully eyeing his backup camera.

"Well, I am glad you accepted my invitation."

~

Zayne was telling the truth about it not being far. You made it there in only a few minutes. Frustratingly though, it had started to drizzle.

"Aw man, my hair and makeup will be ruined. Then everyone will think you brought a drowned rat as your plus one."

Zayne chuckled, pressing the button to turn his car off.

"Nonsense. Chivalry is still alive and well in Linkon."

Once again, he came around to the passenger side of the car rather than pressing the button to let you out. Seemingly out of nowhere, he had produced a large umbrella that was big enough to cover both of you, and especially big enough to protect your hair and makeup.

"Zayne, you are really outdoing yourself already. How could I ever repay you?"

"Don't worry, you already are."

Zayne walked slowly with you, making sure to keep the umbrella placed perfectly over your heads. Thanks to him, you both made it to the doorway of the event hall dry and in one piece.

There were lots of people, which was to be expected. Nevertheless, you instinctively clung to Zayne's arm, wrapping a hand around it tightly.

He was caught off guard, but only for a moment, before placing his large hand over the top of the silky fabric of your glove.

"You hunt Wanderers for a living and you're scared of a little crowd?"

You glared at him playfully, the amusement obvious in his usually soft voice.

"Hush, you meanie."

If you thought there were a lot of people in the foyer, it was nothing compared to the amount of people in the actual hall.

Numerous circular tables littered the hall as far as the eye could see. Pretty much all of the seats were already full, causing you to wonder where the two of you could possibly sit down. In the center against the back wall was the stage, presumably where the speeches Zayne mentioned were going to take place. Flower displays were plentiful, several of the biggest ones taking up the front of the stage, and the smaller ones sitting in between tables. Tiny vases with smaller versions of the displays sat on top of the tables, surrounded by expensive looking crystal dinnerware. It was definitely not something you see every day.

"Where would you like to sit?" Zayne asked.

You scanned the nearest tables, squeezing Zayne's arm when you saw an empty one.

"Let's sit there," you said quietly, pointing with your index finger so he could see what you were talking about.

Zayne nodded once he saw your choice, leading the way through the people that were still standing around.

There were five seats at the table in total, and by the time you got there, one of them was already filled by a young man that hadn't been there before. Oh well, you couldn't have expected to sit at a table with only Zayne at an event like this. But a girl could dream.

After you and Zayne sat down, the young man turned his attention to you. Nothing in particular stood out about him, and you couldn't say you recognized him from anywhere.

"Hello, it's nice to meet you," he said in a voice that didn't quite match his plain-looking features.

"Hi! It's nice to meet you, too," you replied politely.

"And you as well," the man added as he looked towards Zayne.

Zayne nodded, but didn't say anything. It seemed his mind was elsewhere at the moment.

"I'm (Y/N), and this is Dr. Zayne from Akso Hospital."

The man gasped quietly and looked back over to Zayne.

"Ohhh, I've heard a lot about you. You're definitely a big part of the reason the hospital is receiving the award tonight, I'm sure!"

The man seemed genuine in his comment, as far as you could tell.

"I am only doing my job. I have no desire for awards or accolades. Besides, there are many competent doctors and nurses that work at Akso. That is the reason for our award." Zayne said harshly.

You were a bit taken aback by Zayne's choice of words, but you chalked it up to potential nerves about tonight. The man didn't seem too fazed, which relieved you.

"Oh, where are my manners? My name is Richard."

You nodded and smiled at him, just before a sharp noise echoed throughout the event hall. Your eyes searched the surrounding area, and you realized the banquet must be underway. There was a very important looking man near the edge of the stage, clinking a metal spoon against his wine glass.

"As you all know, we are here tonight to recognize the achievements and outstanding service of Akso Hospital...but we are also here to eat!"

This earned a few laughs from the crowd of people, and even one from you. You couldn't deny you were starting to get pretty hungry.

You looked at Zayne and noticed that he did not laugh, nor did he even smile. Instead, he seemed to be set in stone, staring straight ahead at the man speaking by the stage. It almost seemed as if he was looking through him, like his mind was still somewhere else entirely.

"It isn't like Zayne to be nervous...but what else could it be? Does he regret bringing me here? I probably look so silly, like a little girl all dressed up for her secret crush", you thought to yourself.

Ignoring the sudden pain in your chest, you turned your focus back to the man up front.

"...once again, I thank you all for coming. But for now, let us eat and we'll get to the rest of the award ceremony later!"

The hall gradually began to get louder as people began to talk amongst themselves again. This seemed like a good opportunity to get Zayne to talk and settle the nerves that were boiling under the surface of your skin.

"Zayne, aren't you starving? We didn't eat before we came!"

"Mmm," Zayne hummed quietly in agreement.

"Oh! I didn't realize you two came together. Are you...?

Richard didn't finish his implied question and your ears began to burn instantly.

"Oh, no no! Nothing like that," you quickly replied, waving your hands back and forth in front of you.

You didn't dare glance at Zayne, so you weren't sure of his reaction to the conversation. But thankfully you didn't have to worry for long, since Richard started talking again.

"I see! Well, (Y/N), what do you do for a living?"

Grateful for the change in topic, you jumped at the chance.

"Well, I'm a Hunter!"

"She's very good at what she does. I have seen her at work. We often assist each other," Zayne said suddenly from the side.

Both you and Richard glanced at each other before looking at Zayne, who was as stoic as ever, but this time looking directly at you.

Your ears, still not recovered from a few moments ago, grew uncomfortably hot.

"I think the line for food has gotten a bit shorter," Richard pointed out. "Should we go ahead and head over?"

"Yes, I-."

Zayne cut you off, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table.

"Why don't you save us a spot, Richard? I need to ask (Y/N) something about a confidential matter at work. It cannot wait."

Richard stood, giving a small nod and a quick smile in your direction before walking towards the food serving line.

Once he was out of earshot, you hastily gathered yourself before facing Zayne.

"Is something wrong? You've been acting strangely since we sat down."

Zayne pushed up his glasses, keeping his eye on Richard's back as he stood at the end of the line on the other side of the hall.

"There is something odd about him. We should find somewhere else to sit for the night."

You scoffed, unsure of what he could be talking about.

"I'm not sure I understand, Zayne. He seems perfectly normal and nice to me."

He shook his head.

"Don't you trust me?"

"Well, of course I do, but..." you trailed off before continuing, "It just seems like something has gotten into you. Am I not allowed to make friends?"

"Of course you are. You can have as many friends as you like. Just not him. There is something wrong."

For some reason, Zayne's words frustrated you.

"I don't need permission, Zayne. Now if you'll excuse me, I am going to get some food because I am starving. If you'd care to join me, I'll be over there."

Without waiting for a response, you left the table and walked with determination over to Richard, where he was still waiting in line. You truly had no idea what had gotten into your usually very kind and understanding friend, Zayne. You had never seen him act this way, so far as you could remember. Even so, as you got farther away from him, your resolve faltered. Had you been too harsh? No. Zayne was being...weird. You wanted to get to the bottom of it before the night was up.

"Hey!" Richard smiled and waved you over.

You gladly stepped beside him where he had saved you a spot.

"Thanks for holding a place for me, Richard. I'm sorry it took so long for me to get over here."

"It's no problem! I know you and Dr. Zayne must have a lot of secret work you need to do for Linkon. Speaking of, is he coming? There's more than enough room for him!"

You sighed, shaking your head.

"I'm not sure. He seems a bit...stressed at the moment. I may just bring him something to eat to help out a little bit."

Richard nodded.

"That's very kind of you. Dr. Zayne is very lucky to have a friend like you."

"Yeah," you couldn't help but sigh as the staff behind the table handed you a serving of the first dish. "A friend."

As you progressed down the line, Richard told you more about himself. You returned the favor, sparing some of the more private details of your life. But it truly was nice talking with him. He was very easy to get along with, and that further fueled your confusion towards Zayne's behavior.

After the two of you finished getting your food, you made your way back over to the table. As you got closer, you realized Zayne was no longer in his chair.

"Where did Zayne go?"

Richard looked around, nearly spinning in a circle.

"I'm not sure. He must have gotten tied up in an important conversation somewhere."

Just then you felt a buzz in your clutch, your phone alerting you to a text.

You set your plate down and reached into your clutch, grabbing your phone easily thanks to the small size of the bag.

On your phone's screen was a brief text from Zayne, asking you to meet him outside.

"Is everything okay?" Richard asked.

You snapped your attention away from your phone and smiled nervously at Richard.

"Of course! I just need to use the restroom before we start eating. Will you finish telling me your story that you mentioned in line when I get back?"

Richard nodded enthusiastically.

"I would love to!"

"Great, I'll be right back, I promise."

~

The air outside had gotten significantly cooler after the sun finished setting. Thankfully, it wasn't raining anymore. But you didn't see Zayne anywhere. He wasn't in the foyer and not immediately outside of the building. Almost in a panic, you turned around to search the entire parking lot. And that's when you caught a glimpse of a nearby streetlight reflecting off of something other than a car a few feet away.

It was Zayne's glasses, and he was leaned up against the side of his car with his arms crossed, looking off to the side.

"Zayne?"

Your voice caught his attention, and he used his weight to push himself off his car and move closer to you.

"There you are. I need you to come with me, we have to go."

As you got closer to him, you noticed he had an unfamiliar look in his eyes. It was one you had never seen in them before, and it instinctively made you nervous.

"Zayne, what's going on? You've been so weird tonight and now you're kind of scaring me."

Zayne sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Forgive me, I..."

You remained silent, waiting for him to finish, the rapid beating of your heart pounding in your eardrums.

"I seem to be acting on my impulses tonight. Something I thought I had been teaching myself not to do."

His actions were still not understandable to you, and he instantly read the confusion on your face.

"It's...it's his fault," Zayne murmured. "It's this dress."

Suddenly, he bent down to your level and ran his finger up the sleek fabric of your dress resting against your thigh. It caused you to tense up and shiver, whether from his actions or the night air, you weren't quite sure.

What you were sure of though, was how badly you wanted him to touch you again.

"Forgive me," he repeated. "I can call you a taxi to take home. I shouldn't have done that."

"Zayne," you said abruptly, causing him to stop from getting his phone out.

"Yes?"

"Kiss me."

"What?"

"Kiss me," you repeated, this time a little less confident.

Zayne didn't say anything else before closing the rest of the gap between you in one step. Both of his large hands found space on each side of your face, and they rested there for a moment before he looked at you in the eyes, his own moving back and forth to discern the expression on your face.

"(Y/N)..." he began hesitantly.

"What?"

"If tonight has shown me anything, it's that I have not been controlling my impulses as well as I have previously. If I do this...I fear that I won't be able to stop myself."

You tried to take a deep breath, but it got caught in your throat.

"Do you want to kiss me, Zayne?"

"Yes," he breathed, pressing his forehead against yours and closing his frenzied eyes. "I cannot tell you what it has been like, seeing you almost every day now and falling in love with you all over, again and again. I have waited as patiently as I could have."

Shakily, you reached a hand up and loosely gripped one of Zayne's hands still on your cheek.

"Again? You've fallen in love with me before?"

Zayne hummed quietly, almost imperceptibly shaking his head against yours.

"Never mind that. Just know that I need you...I always have."

"Zayne, I..."

Something about what he was saying felt eerily familiar, and it felt like an invisible force was pulling you somehow even more closer to him in that moment.

"Please," Zayne whispered. "Tell me what you want."

"I...I want..."

Zayne rubbed his nose against yours, inching closer and closer to your parted lips. His labored breaths mixed with your shallow ones, causing the cool night air to visibly swirl around you. Your heart continued to pound, so loud and hard you were sure Zayne could hear it.

"I need to hear you say it...one more time."

Lighter than a feather, his lips brushed against yours as he spoke to you. And finally, finally, you were able to get your words out.

"I want you to kiss me...and I don't want you to stop."

Zayne tightened his grip on your face, his hands slipping slightly due to the thin layer of sweat that was between your skin and his. And then he pressed his lips firmly against yours.

You would be lying if you said you hadn't thought about what it would be like to kiss Zayne before. You had always assumed it would be magical, meaningful, and passionate.

And it turns out, you were right.

His lips tasted slightly sweet as he moved them against yours in perfect harmony. The sounds of your breathing echoed around you, muffled slightly by the sheer lack of distance between his face and yours. Your hands moved to hold onto his shoulders, and his moved from your cheeks to your waist, leaving a feeling of bitter cold behind. Somehow, in the contrasting heat of it all, he turned you around so you were now pressed between him and his car.

As soon as he did this, the kisses became more sloppy, more intense. You could feel his energy shift and it nearly caused your knees to buckle as he moaned quietly into your mouth. It occurred to you that your nails might be digging into his shoulders, but he didn't seem to notice.

Suddenly unable to breathe, you were the first to pull away. Zayne froze, looking down at you with a scared look in his eyes now.

"Are you okay? I'm sorry, I should have restrained myself properly."

"Zayne...again. Please, I only needed to catch my breath. You aren't the only one who has been waiting for this, you know."

This time, you didn't even wait for him to initiate the kiss. You moved in first, catching him slightly off guard. But he recovered quickly, matching your intensity in a flash.

The tip of his tongue brushed against your bottom lip, causing you to shiver for what felt like the hundredth time tonight. You weren't sure if he did it on purpose or if just happened, but you decided to open your lips slightly, providing an opening for him to push into deeper than before.

Zayne quickly obliged, a significant portion of his tongue meeting yours. This time it was your turn to moan, though yours was a little less controlled, and a little more loud.

He audibly groaned, the gnashing of your lips, tongue, and teeth causing a drop of saliva to run down your chin. You were pressed up against his car so tightly that it cause your shoulder blades to burn where they met the hard exterior of it. Zayne had a vice grip on your hips, and his hands were so large that you were sure it would leave marks.

The slit in your dress that you were shocked by earlier became Zayne's next target. He used one finger to trail up your thigh and hook under the edge of the slit as he kissed you, the fabric being pulled taught against your tingling skin.

Once again, you pulled away, letting your head roll back so that it rested against the top of his car. Your chest heaved, stretching the dress where it rested against your breasts with every breath in.

Zayne nestled his head into the crook of your neck, leaving small, wet kisses there. His finger that had been hooked into the slit of your dress continued its way up your body until his hand came to rest against your ribcage.

"Zayne, we should...get back before people start noticing we're gone."

"Hmm," he hummed against your collarbone.

"I mean it. What about the speeches?"

"Easy..." he murmured before placing an open-mouthed kiss, this time against your jawline. "Forget them."

"Zayne! You can't be serious."

"I assure you, I'm very serious. As serious as a heart attack."

You weakly raised your head back up to meet his gaze. There was a deep hunger in his expression, one that you could tell had not been fully satisfied.

"I did warn you," Zayne murmured before kissing you on the lips again briefly. "I have waited so long for you, it will be nearly impossible for me to let you go now that I have you."

You couldn't help but wonder what exactly he had in mind. But your thoughts and your body seemed to be communicating together, the undeniable warmth from your core spreading outwards fast. You knew you wanted to taste him again, to feel him against you again.

"Take me home, Zayne."

~

The drive back to your apartment seemed longer than it did when you left earlier. Inside Zayne's car, the air was thick with tension and desire. Neither of you spoke, too hesitant to mess anything up.

Once you were at your door, you prayed Zayne didn't see your hands shake slightly when getting your keys out to unlock it.

As you made it inside, Zayne closed the door behind the two of you and then slowly crouched down in front of you.

"Zayne, what are you..."

"Shh. Let me help you."

He motioned for you to lift one foot up, and you did so. He then undid your heel's strings and slid it off your foot carefully, before repeating the same steps on the other foot.

This time though, he placed his hand against your calf and let it trail up your bare leg until he stood up all the way. He took a deep breath as he did so, causing you to shake in anticipation.

"(Y/N). I know what I said, but if at any point anything becomes too much for you...or you simply change your mind, I want you to tell me. I will never do anything you don't want to do. Does that make sense?"

You nodded, overwhelmed with all the feelings coursing through you at the moment.

Zayne seemed satisfied, taking off his suit jacket and hanging it by the door. You couldn't help but notice how nicely his white button-up shirt sat against his toned arms.

He chuckled.

"If you don't like this," he said softly, pulling at the fabric of his sleeve, "I can remove it, too."

Involuntarily, you shuddered, realizing what he meant. But you had a better idea.

"Can I?"

Though your question was short, he understood what it meant.

Without a word, he stopped closer to you, looking down at you with a glint in his eye.

"If that's what you'd like."

You didn't mean to necessarily, but you held your breath as you let your clutch fall to the floor and instead placed your hands at his collar. As carefully as you could, you undid the first button of his shirt. Zayne watched you intently, his breathing picking up again like it had earlier in the parking lot.

One of your knuckles accidentally brushed against his collarbone while you undid another button, and it was his turn to shiver, even at such a slight touch. Honestly, it made you feel good, knowing that he must be feeling the same things you are feeling.

You continued down the shirt, each button coming undone with an almost inaudible pop sound. The farther you made it down, the more of his chest you started to see. It was unsurprisingly perfect, chiseled in all the right places, so much better than you could have ever imagined.

By the time you made it to the last button, you needed to pull the fabric out from where it was tucked into the hem of his pants. It was here that you hesitated.

"Are you alright?" Zayne asked, sensing your mind reeling. He placed a hand over top of yours where it still held onto the last button of his shirt.

"Yes, I'm alright. I just...don't want to mess anything up."

"Don't worry. You are perfect. Whatever happens will be perfect. Let me help again, okay?"

"Okay," you whispered, nearly silent.

Zayne gently removed your hand from the last button, and tugged his shirt out from his pants to remove it completely.

Your breath hitched in your throat as you took in the sight before you.

Then without thinking properly, you let your hands reach out for him, flattening against his bare chest. Your fingers traced the lines carved into his skin, and you realized you really shouldn't be surprised at this since you know he works out regularly.

“Would you let me take you somewhere more comfortable?” Zayne asked, nodding his head towards your bedroom.

“That definitely isn’t a bad idea.”

Zayne chuckled at you again before grabbing one of your hands to lead you away, making sure to carefully step over your forgotten bag and his white shirt on the floor.

He sat on the edge of your bed, waiting for you to enter into the room completely.

You were still mesmerized by him, by the situation. And then you realized that you had on remarkably more clothing than him. You decided to enlist his help one more time.

You turned in a circle, so that your back was now facing him. Though you could do it yourself, you thought this would be more fun.

“Help me again, Dr. Zayne”

From behind you, you could hear him stand up and make his way over to you. You moved your hair out of the way so that the zipper on the back of your dress was now visible.

“If that is what you wish.”

Even through the material of your dress, you could feel his cold fingers against your back as they slid the zipper down to your waist.

Once he made it to your waist, you took a step forward and chanced a look over your shoulder.

Zayne stood behind you, watching you with another unknown emotion behind his darkened green eyes.

You shrugged off the top of your dress, causing it to instantly gather around your waist. Your bare back was now directly in front of Zayne, as the dress didn’t require you to wear a bra. The air in your room made you tense up.

Braving any lingering fears, you pulled the dress past your hips so that it fell to the floor, and you stepped out of it. Now you stood only in your underwear.

A few seconds passed and you could then hear Zayne take another step forward. A few seconds more, and you hissed as Zayne’s cold hands made contact with your exposed hips.

“So beautiful,” he whispered, planting a kiss against your shoulder.

You no longer felt the metal of his glasses bump into your skin, so you assumed he must’ve tossed them aside.

“Let me show you what you do to me. What seeing you with someone else does to me. How it makes me feel…”

Before you could respond, one of Zayne’s hands snaked around the front of your waist and began teasing the waistband of your underwear. You instantly knew what he was planning to do.

“And more importantly, let me make you feel good.”

You couldn’t help but gasp sharply at how bold Zayne was being as he gently slid the tips of his fingers past the edge of your underwear. His other hand was laid flat against your stomach from behind you, and the pressure against you only intensified once his pointer finger made contact with the edge of your aching core.

Zayne placed his chin on your shoulder, looking down with an almost gleeful smirk on his lips while he watched the rest of his hand disappear past your last piece of clothing.

“Mmmm,” you hummed as the pad of his pointer finger circled around your center.

“Such a pretty sound,” Zayne stated as if it was a well known fact.

He took this time to softly dip the one finger inside of you, pumping it a few times before adding his middle finger. You could tell he was instantly covered in the wetness coming from deep within you, the slick feeling of his fingers inside already driving you wild.

A fire began burning inside your mind and body as he continued drawing his two fingers in and out of you, curving them slightly to find the spot that would inevitably cause you to unravel around him.

Your knees buckled and his grip around your waist with his other hand tightened.

“I’ve got you. I always will,” Zayne spoke against the thin skin of your neck, nuzzling deeper into the space between it and your shoulder.

The faster he went, the less you felt like you were physically there. The only feeling you had right now was the feeling of his touch, as if that feeling which wasn't even your own doing was the only thing that tied your existence to this room, to this place. You weren't even sure if you were standing properly anymore or if he was holding you up with his other arm. You didn't really care.

Never in your wildest dreams had you expected to end up in this situation. But now that you were, you couldn't imagine being anywhere else or with anyone else. You knew from this point on, he was the only one allowed to witness you like this. There was no going back from this. He had drawn you in and made you his, and this was where you belonged.

It was when you realized this that you came undone.

Somehow, you remained conscious of your neighbors and stifled the strangled whines that threatened to escape your gaping mouth. You eyes screwed shut in pure concentration, causing a single tear to escape the corner of your right eye.

"Shh," came Zayne's quiet voice from behind you.

He rubbed his nose against your cheek where the tear had fallen, ultimately wiping it away. The contrast of his cool nose against the sizzling skin of your cheek was very noticeable.

"Would you like to lay down?"

"Mhmm." This was the only sound you could get out now, but Zayne understood.

He kept a stable grip on you because he had, in fact, been holding you up for the past several minutes. You would have to thank him later.

Zayne guided you towards the bed and helped you first to sit down, and then to lay your head against the pillows. He gingerly grabbed your ankles and readjusted your legs so that they would be laying more comfortably on the end of the bed.

You couldn't help but cringe at the feeling of your now freezing, wet underwear that was sloppily pulled back into its proper position.

From the left side, you could hear Zayne lay down next to you, and his wide hand rubbed the clammy skin of your stomach.

You laid in silence for a few moments, waiting for your breathing to calm down before speaking.

"That was, ummm..."

You briefly glanced over at the man next to you and couldn't think of what to say next, your mind a tangled mess. Really, you had assumed he would say something to fill the silence where you were lacking. But when he didn't, you decided to take a better look at him.

Though his hand had come to a rest on your stomach, he was not looking at you. Instead he was looking at the ceiling, his jaw set harshly as if he was concentrating on something.

"Zayne, are you okay? Did I do something wrong?"

You rolled over onto your side, wrapping an arm around him and trying to ignore the feeling of your bare nipples against his cool exterior.

"No," he said shortly, but softly. "You were perfect, just as I said you would be. I just find myself...struggling to restrain my actions further when I should already be satisfied. And I am...satisfied. However, it would seem that you allowing me this pleasure has turned me into not only an impulsive version of myself, but a greedy one as well."

"Zayne...?"

You began to sit up on your elbow to look at his face, but your other hand brushed up against a lower part of him you weren't expecting to. The sensation immediately elicited a sharp hiss from Zayne.

"Oh!" you exclaimed in surprise, "I'm sorry."

Zayne shook his head roughly.

"Don't be. And don't feel obligated. Promise me, (Y/N). We don't have to go any further."

For a minute, you thought about what you would like to happen next. You took Zayne's words to heart, and you knew he meant them.

But perhaps you had become a bit impulsive as well.

Wordlessly, you finished sitting up enough to look down at Zayne who was now making eye contact with you rather than looking at the ceiling. Your hand had come to rest on his lower stomach now, right below his belly button. If you moved down any further...

You noticed how tight the fabric of his pants was around his bulge. You swallowed thickly, the embers of the fire you felt a little while ago becoming reignited.

"(Y/N)..."

Zayne watched as you looked between him and his painfully restricted erection.

"What do you want, Zayne?"

He was visibly surprised at your sudden confidence, but remained composed.

"That is not as important as what you want. I will always place your needs and wants above my own, no matter how tempting it may be otherwise."

Zayne sounded almost hoarse from timid anticipation and it only further fueled your own desires.

"Let me show you what I want."

He didn't say anything else, he could only watch as your now steady hands touched the belt keeping his pants up.

"(Y/N)," he repeated, this time urgently.

"I want..."

You let your sentence trail off and began undoing his belt as sensually as you could manage. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Zayne's chest begin to heave as he studied you like a hawk.

"You."

The belt was now completely undone, and you pulled it from its loops to toss it carelessly aside on the floor. You then undid the zipper of his pants, the sound of it clashing with Zayne's distorted breaths. Once you had the zipper down all the way, you did the best you could to pull his pants down while he was laying down. It didn't take much before his throbbing length was now restrained by one less layer of clothing.

He shook at the air hitting him down there, and you struggled to keep your eyes from widening noticeably at how large he seemed to be. At the center of his white underwear, you could see several small dark spots from his increasing arousal.

Before he could try to talk you out of it, you lifted one of your legs to straddle him. Both of you moaned simultaneously as your tingling core came into contact with his rock-hard bulge.

Using the last bit of your newfound confidence, you bent down and captured his lips in a wet kiss.

"I have always wanted you."

Zayne watched your lips in awe as you spoke, the corner of his own lifting in a small smile.

And then he collided into you.

It was like the kisses you shared in the parking lot, only...it wasn't at the same time. This felt more primal, more passionate. As if your souls had begun threading together like they were somehow meant to.

You held onto his face tightly as he kissed you, the wet sounds of your mouths echoing in your small bedroom. His deft hands came to rest on your ass, and they dug into the softness there as he thrusted upwards against your throbbing genitals. This caused your back to arch slightly, making your lips leave his, the only thing now connecting them a string of your mixed saliva.

Zayne took this opportunity to roll you under him so that he was now hovering over your exposed body.

One hand held his own body up, and the other tenderly traced around the edge of your breasts.

"You are too good to me," Zayne sighed under his breath.

"And while I do not normally condone this..."

Zayne stood up suddenly and fully removed his pants and underwear in what seemed like one swift motion before climbing back over top of you.

"I have no control left within my body."

His hands gripped your underwear tightly, his knuckles turning white and his veins popping as he completely ripped the flimsy material off of you.

"Zayne!"

He gripped the headboard, leaning over you to whisper in your ear.

"I'll buy you more."

You shuddered at both his words and the proximity of his naked body to yours.

"Do you trust me?" he continued.

"Yes. I trust you Zayne."

"Then hold on," he growled, his hot breath fanning over your ear.

Using his other hand to grip himself, he steered his length to your entrance, teasing it slightly with the head.

"Oh, shit," you gasped loudly.

With no further hesitation, Zayne fully inserted himself inside of you, making the both of you moan noisily. He remained there for a moment, his sweaty chest rubbing against your own. The hand that was on the headboard now came down against the mattress to hold the rest of his body up. His other hand grabbed one of yours, and he weaved his fingers in-between your own.

Your clasped hands gripped each other stiffly as he started to thrust in and out of you. As he did so, your other hand clawed at his back.

Where it had been silent before, your room now seemed like a concert of lewd noises. Zayne's grunts, your mewls, the wet sound of your bodies slamming together repeatedly...it was all so disgustingly beautiful.

Though your eyes were shut, you could feel Zayne's sticky forehead against your temple. The grip he had on your hand intensified, and the rapid, hot breaths from his mouth collided with your neck. Shamefully fast, you felt the familiar feeling of your impending climax, and you couldn't help but wonder if Zayne could, too.

"You..." Zayne panted, pulling himself out of you before slamming back in, all the way up to the base of his cock. "Already?"

You scoffed, opening your eyes to look at him, chastising yourself for thinking he was anything other than observant.

"You do things...to me too, you know?"

Zayne groaned, almost animalistic in the way that it sounded.

You licked your swollen lips, the moisture temporarily aiding in the chapped sensation you had been feeling.

"I want to feel it...I want you to look at me."

Zayne withdrew his hand from yours and instead grabbed your chin roughly. He then turned it, so that you were facing him completely.

"You are doing so well..."

For some reason, you fixated on the sweat that was flowing down the side of Zayne's face, dripping from his soaking wet hair. A few drops of it landed on your cheeks, but Zayne's increasingly harsh thrusts made them run down to your neck.

He kept a grip on your chin and began sucking on the skin where his sweat had pooled against a divot in your neck. It was with such force, you knew there would be a purple bruise there the next morning. The thought of others being able to see the evidence of the filthy night you had with Zayne was enough to send you over the edge for the second time.

Zayne felt you begin to tense up, and knowing what was coming and that he would not be able to stop himself from climaxing inside of you if he remained there, he begrudgingly removed himself just in time.

His warm cum splattered harshly against your pulsing core, and he couldn't help but watch as it did. The sight of you so utterly spent and covered in his seed was enough to make him collapse next to you.

This time, the silence in the room seemed ridiculously loud. It smelled completely of sex, and you knew you would have to wash your bedding tomorrow.

But you also couldn't help but feel completely at ease. That was the closest you could have ever hoped to be to the man you loved.

Love...what a word, right?

Part of you wanted to proclaim it right then and there. Though the other part of you was content with the silence, laying next to the second half of your somewhat broken soul.

It felt complete. You felt complete. And you hoped he did too.

You'd have to thank Richard if you ever saw him again.

[syluss-karaoke-teacher]

Love and Deepspace - Nightly Rendezvous - Part IV, Sylus

And finally we complete the series with Sylus' card!! I admit, I kinda dreaded him bc alongside Raf he is my main and his card was so breathtakingly emotional, not to mention pretty much canonically their first time. Hope I was able to do it justice!

Word count: 2539 words

MDNI! Tags and main text under the cut. You have been warned.

NOTE: This fic is only posted on tumblr and on AO3 under the pseud Yuli_Hunter. All other uploads on any other websites are non-authorized. I do not own any part of Love and Deepspace as an IP, but I do own this piece of fanfiction, and you are not allowed to repost it, copy it or otherwise claim it as your own.

That's it, enjoy! ❤️

Tags: reader!MC, fem!reader, PWP, fingering and oral (f!receiving), PIV, mentions of overstimulation, Sylus is king of consent, emotional sex, first time together, yes I make all of them eat MC out what are you going to do about it?

Not beta-read we die like Grandma

*~*~*

You point the gun at his chest with a victorious smirk.

“I won. Now for my prize, Mr. Crow.”

Sylus chuckles, the sound rumbling deep from his chest as he raises his hands in mock surrender. His crimson eyes reflect the crackling fire that illuminates the living room.

“Fair and square kitten. Ask away.”

The tension between you two is so thick you could almost grasp it with your hands. In many ways it is not unlike your first ever meeting. Back then you hated him, hated everything he represented. Then you thought you hated him, and then wished you hated him.

And now… Now you hate that you ever hated him.

You still don’t know why Sylus decided to meet you the way he did, but you aren’t naïve enough anymore to believe it’s solely because he is the boss of Onychinus. The discoveries you have made along your journey have made you painfully aware of just how incomplete your worldview was.

The man before you is a killer and a criminal, yes. But a monster he is not. After all he has shown that he is capable of changing and learning from his mistakes; if not for anything or anyone else, then at least for you.

That is why the famously impatient and easily bored man waits for you, his silver eyebrow arched in a silent question, not pushing or prompting. As he has done from the minute he heard you despised him.

Sylus has no problem embarrassing you: he enjoys seeing you squirm and blush, whether due to walking around in little more than a towel hanging precariously from his sinful hips, or due to the sudden tenderness that he slips into your everyday moments together. He doesn’t hide his gaze raking over your body as you try on a new designer dress he bought for you, and if you ask him directly he will tell you in no uncertain terms just how beautiful you are to him. Yet despite the intensity that oozed from his very being, he always stopped at just the right distance. If you so wanted, this night would end like your nights so far had always ended: in separate bedrooms, with you getting more frustrated each time.

Well, not anymore. If you wanted to play the part of a big, fearless hunter, you should be able to manage this much of an offensive.

“I’m getting tired, Sylus.” To emphasize your words, you fake a yawn and stretch.

Sylus lowers his hands and cocks his head to the side. “That doesn’t sound like a question, sweetie.”

You pointedly ignore his jab, place the gun on the table and lay your hands on his shoulders instead.

“Can you take me to bed?”

There’s a sharp flash in his eyes, and you watch as his whole being refocuses on you. His muscles tense ever so slightly, and you see his Adam’s apple bob before he answers you.

“I thought you wanted to know my destination for tomorrow.”

For an outsider that would be a perfectly normal question. But to you, the only one that Sylus has let this close, the quiet raspiness in his voice tells you everything you need to know; the great leader of Onychinus is in the palm of your hand.

You slide your fingers up the sides of his neck to cradle his face. The crackling of the fireplace isn’t quite enough to drown out the quickening of his breath as you lean in closer.

“I’d rather live in the present, so I won’t dwell on a situation beyond my control. So… will you?”

Sylus’ answer is an unsteady exhale before he tightens one broad arm around your waist. You loop your arms around his shoulders as he lifts you off the couch and starts walking towards the master bedroom. His hand on your thigh almost burns through the flimsy fabric of your loungewear set, and his other hand gently turns your head towards him as he passes through the dimly lit corridors. He doesn’t break your gaze for a second, not even as he settles you on the ground between the loveseat and the bed.

“If you want to go to sleep, you need to release me,” he murmurs, making no move to pull apart. You look up at him coyly and press your body against him. Your head barely comes up to his chin, and you can feel his heart thundering in his chest.

“What if I don’t want to let go of you?”

Sylus smirks, but you see that the corner of his mouth quivering. His hold on you tightens again and he turns you both around before nodding towards the loveseat.

“Then I can keep holding you until dawn,” he says and runs his hand up and down your spine. The heat in his gaze is unmistakable now, and yet he doesn’t act on it. The man who forced you to fire a bullet into his heart the first time you met would now rather rip that same heart out with his own bare hands rather than make you uncomfortable.

The sweet tenderness makes you ache, but right at this moment a feeling far more intense demands to be let loose.

You bring your hands to Sylus’ chest and push him onto the loveseat. He lets out a small, surprised huff as you climb onto his lap and cradle his head once more in your hands.

“Then hold me,” you whisper, only inches away from his lips, “until dawn and beyond.”

The small kiss is all it takes for the dam to break. Sylus moans into your mouth and winds his arm tightly behind your hips and his other hand behind your head, locking you in place as he takes the lead. Sylus’ kisses are all-consuming and feverish, with no room for hesitation. You had been confident that he would return your feelings, but the sheer intensity of his actions leaves you breathless.

When your lips are red and swollen he finally pulls away, only to press a line of kisses along your jaw and neck. His hands run along your hips and ass and pull you flush against him. You whine as you feel the outline of his hard cock against your clothed core. He rocks his hips experimentally against yours.

“Is this okay?” he asks as he kisses your earlobe, “you’ll tell me if you want me to stop, right kitten?”

You answer by kissing him deeply. For a moment he lets you grind against him, but then pulls you back and looks at you with seriousness you didn’t expect.

“I need you to say it: ‘I will tell Sylus to stop whenever I want to.’”

You study his face for a moment, and that tender aching in your chest simmers to life again.

“I will tell you to stop whenever I want to,” you echo back to him. “Now take me to bed.”

You gasp as strong hands grab your ass and lift you up as effortlessly as picking up a kitten by its scruff. Sylus’ lips latch onto your neck and the twinge of pain as he sucks on your skin sends a jolt of electricity down to your core.

Sylus sets you down on the bed. His massive frame blocks the ceiling light almost completely from view. It makes his eyes shine even brighter, and you feel your breath catching in your throat. You lift your fingers to gently trace the corner of the eye wherein his Aether core resides.

“Am I greedy if I say I want you to only look at me?”. Sylus isn’t using his power on you, but you can hear your innermost thoughts raging in your head, nonetheless. They form only one name, one target.

Sylus smiles. It isn’t teasing or arrogant as his usual smirks; your question seems to delight him.

“You have always had the right to demand it, kitten. Which means you can be even greedier now.”

He lifts up your hips and grinds your core against his. You whine as he rocks himself against your silk shorts, the thin fabric doing nothing to hide the wetness that soils your panties underneath. The friction of the fabric against your clit makes your toes curl and you squeeze Sylus’ arm in response.

“Sylus…” you groan between kisses. The world around you grows hazy as your brain struggles to give orders to your body. You want everything from him, all at once, but the words die on your tongue and morph into moans and gasps instead.

Luckily there is an end to Sylus’ self-control after all. Just as you think you can’t take it anymore, he leans his forehead against yours and looks at you so reverently it forces your addled mind into focus once more.

“Do you want this?” he asks. This, meaning him, on you, inside you, tonight or for all eternity?

“Yes. All of it. All of you.”

A twinge of energy skitters along your skin as Sylus’ Evol surges from his fingertips. In seconds both of your clothes fall apart, covering the bed in black tatters. Before you can so much as squeak Sylus flips you over and settles you onto his chest. You gasp at the feeling of your bare pussy pressing against his firm chest. He spreads you wide open and strokes the skin of your thighs with his thumbs.

“I’m afraid I won’t be able to stop once I get to taste you,” he says as his fingers slide closer to your center. “So I’m hoping your answer won’t change.”

You shake your head and let your eyes fall close as Sylus strokes your glistening folds with the calloused pads of his fingers. He stays away from your clit, making you whine from frustration. He chuckles and you slap his chest in retaliation.

“I need to hear what you need, sweetie,” he replies as he catches your hand and brings it his lips to kiss it. “Your pleasure is my pleasure. Whatever you want me to do, I will.”

He pushes your hand backwards past your hips. You blindly reach behind you and shudder as you feel his heavy cock resting against his abdomen. The slight touch makes him sigh and you watch as a beautiful flush rises on his cheeks as you gingerly stroke him.

“See how little it takes? Just the mere opportunity to be able to please you has made me this way. So believe me when I say this, kitten… You are allowed to ask anything of me.”

Your breathing struggles to flow as you take in his words. Your thighs tremble at his sides as you finally swallow your hesitation.

“Your mouth, Sylus… I want you to use your mou—”

The rest of the sentence is drowned in a pitiful wail as Sylus pulls you forward onto his face. You hastily brace yourself on the headboard as he pushes his tongue inside you. You can feel his nose bumping against your clit as he eats you out like a man starved. Instinctively you rock your hips against the divine, soft heat of his mouth. You feel him groan against you, his hands gripping you even tighter to block out any notion of pulling back from your position.

“Sylus, Sylus, oh god…” you whimper as you try to stay upright. You feel so incredibly wet it’s almost humiliating, but the relentless pressure makes you forget any rational thought as you fast approach a high you have never experienced before. You feel Sylus take his other hand from your hip and maneuver it under you, and before you can ask him if he needs a break you feel him slide his middle finger inside your pussy. He changes his position to focus more on your clit as he rubs you from the inside. The change in pace makes you howl.

“Please, please, oh god, feels so good Sylus, please, I’m—” you babble and grip the headboard with white knuckles. Stars swim into your vision as your body tenses to a breaking point. When Sylus pushes another finger in your mouth falls agape in a silent scream and you crash over the peak. The orgasm rolls over you like a tidal wave, and if it wasn’t for the strength of Sylus’ hands you would collapse entirely.

You feel like floating when Sylus lifts you up and flips you over onto your back. He wipes his glistening jaw with the back of his hand as he stares into your eyes with a hunger that hasn’t been satiated in the slightest. You let him manhandle you into spreading your legs for him, hands pressing your things apart and down, his cock dragging itself against your glistening pussy.

“More,” he whispers as he squeezes your thighs almost painfully. “Please, let me hear it. Tell me you want it too.”

You watch as his cockhead catches onto your entrance before sliding forward once more. You feel yourself clenching around nothing as you image him inside you, claiming you, filling you to the brim. You are still quivering from your high as you plead him to take you, all of you.

The moment you give him permission he takes it to heart again. He pushes inside you slowly, lets you adjust to his size, his broad chest heaving with the effort of holding back. His eyes are glazed over with both want and something soft, something you don’t dare yet name. His figure becomes unfocused as tears well up in your eyes from the almost painful fullness.

“Sylus, it’s too much,” you gasp, and he kisses the corner of your mouth.

“Just breathe, almost there.”

By the time he has pressed himself in to the hilt of his cock your head is trashing against the pillows and your pussy is leaking around him in a desperate effort to ease the intrusion. Your mind grows hazy once more as he starts to rock into you, and you could swear you feel his cock nudging your goddamn throat at this point. Just as you think you can’t take much more you feel Sylus’ fingers rub tight circles on your clit.

“Let go sweetie. You can cum as many times as you want. We have the whole night after all.”

And with that he pulls out almost completely before slamming back in, his cock pushing straight against the sweet spot inside you. Your world goes white as you shatter around him.

This time he doesn’t stop. He fucks you like a man possessed, pulling orgasm after orgasm from you as you fight to stay coherent. Only your fourth one proves too much for him and he finally spills inside you with a long, shaking groan. Even then it’s merely a moment’s distraction. His cock doesn’t even soften inside you: instead, he fucks his seed deeper into you while shaking from overstimulation. You tell him with a failing voice that he too can stop if he wants to, but your only answer are blunt nails pressing crescent moon shapes into your hips as he carries you both deep into the night.

Tell me you want it.

I do, Sylus. I want it all.

[erulasse23]

Frodo & PTSD: Healing

At the end of Frodo’s journey, he is left feeling isolated, alone, and without joy. It says in “The Grey Havens” that he withdrew from Shire life. When he becomes “ill” on the anniversary of being stabbed (by the Nazgul and Shelob), he hides it from Sam and says nothing. We know that his self-concept has been irreversibly changed. He set out from the Shire as a kind gentle-hobbit, with the idea of adventure being exciting and fun, only to be confronted with suffering, the reality of evil, and his own perceived failures. 

In the end, he cannot conceive of a life outside of his trauma and how he has been changed by his journey. He decides to sail to Valinor. Now what is interesting is that while the fandom (at least recently) has interpreted this as Frodo going to find healing in Valinor since he could not in Middle Earth, Tolkien never says that he is going for the purpose of healing. Rather, you get the impression that he has given up on healing. That his wounds are too deep and his joy too far lost. Sailing does indeed mark an end to his suffering, but not necessarily because he has healed. 

I want to interject a bit of historical context here. While Tolkien was writing the Lord of the Rings, post World War II, research on mental health was lightyears behind where it is today. The diagnosis of PTSD would not be added to the DSM until 1980, after wide study in the aftermath of the Vietnam War. In Tolkien’s time, it was called “battle fatigue” or “combat stress reaction”. Treatments ranged from electroshock therapy, to sedatives, to psychotherapy. The field of psychotherapy was a bit chaotic then, with the emergence of several new styles such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), still widely practiced today. 

The problem with these treatments, including CBT, is that they do not address the actual cause of PTSD. As previously discussed, PTSD occurs when the body’s stress response is overwhelmed and becomes “stuck”. CBT aims to change our rational thoughts and ideas, which then change the resultant emotions. This is a “top-down” approach. People who have experienced trauma do not necessarily respond to this because symptoms don’t come from a thought or belief from our rational brain, they come from our subconscious brain being stuck in crisis mode. Therefore, a “bottom-up” approach works much better.

Currently, some of the most-recommended treatments for PTSD include DBT (dialectical behavior therapy), EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing), and neurofeedback therapy, all aiming to create a sense of physical sensation of safety, allow for traumatic memories to be processed appropriately, and to “unstick” our brains. A sense of community and mindfulness, fully inhabiting our bodies but not being alone in them, is essential to recovery. 

So let’s compare Frodo to Eowyn. Eowyn also suffers a grievous blow from the Witch-King himself and is left afterwards with the same symptoms: despair, dark dreams, and she is cold and pale. The difference between the two, however, is that, “Her malady begins far back before this day,” as Aragon says. Eowyn, for a variety of reasons (that’s a whole other post if we’re going to discuss her trauma), rode out with the feeling that her only purpose was to die in battle. She says that she does not want healing, she only wishes to return to the battle and die. Her injury and the Black Shadow of the Nazgul are not a new experience for her, they do not change her self-conception. They only make her more determined. 

Healing for Eowyn begins when Faramir takes the time to listen to her and validate her feelings. He does not tell her she is wrong, or attempt to change her belief. He sits with her, and eventually, he explains that he loves her for herself, fully separate from her trauma or depression and regardless of what emotions she is feeling. He enables her to see that she is more than her grief. He shows her a life where she is not alone and where she may feel happy again, and she allows herself feel that happiness rather than clinging to death. Her character evolution is almost an inverse of Frodo's in this way.

Now this is not at all a criticism of Sam (I love that hobbit to death!!) but Sam does not provide this same sense of community to Frodo. Sam loves Frodo, but his attention is divided between Frodo and Rosie (and the regular Shire goings-on). Sam struggles to understand why Frodo cannot enjoy the Shire as he once did, and he isn’t able to offer the same sort of validation. But I think Sam is the reason that Frodo stayed as long as he did, and the reason that Frodo was able to complete his quest. And I like to think that once Sam arrived in Valinor, he was reunited with a Frodo who, while not the hobbit he was before the Fellowship, has regained a sense of joy and togetherness. 

If you want more information about any of the topics that I briefly touched on here, let me know! I’m always happy to yap about my interests :)

Part One | Part Two

[twopoppies]

About the fight with Zayn, I do think it was something real that affected all the boys, but especially Louis. What bothered me the most at the time was that from Zayn’s side, the narrative pushed was that harry’s ambitions for a solo career caused 1D to break up, and Zayn mentioned he was never close to Harry. This wasn’t denied on Harry's side, likely because it helped his solo career. Still, some fans hold this against Harry, ignoring the fact that even Liam implied in several interviews that for things to be resolved between them, Zayn would have to acknowledge his mistakes, which seemed unlikely. Louis also addressed this. I don't hate Zayn or anything, just annoyed with how he handled things when he left 1D, suggesting that Harry was to blame.

I do think harry suggested the hiatus but not only because he wanted a solo career (probably the Azoffs also advised him), but because he realised that the five of them were struggling both physically and mentally.

Anyway, I’m really glad they've made amends. I just wish Liam could have witnessed it too.

Hi, love I don’t actually recall Zayn blaming Harry or Liam saying those things, but I think it’s pretty clear from what Zayn has said recently, and what Harry has said in the past, that it was Harry who proposed not re-signing their contracts with Syco. Zayn was very unhappy and unwell, but he was also ambitious and wanted to get a jump on Harry and release his music first, so he split.

In his interview with Call Her Daddy Zayn spoke about leaving and said:

"There was a lot of politics going on. Certain people were doing certain things, certain people didn't wanna sign contracts, so I knew something was happening. So I just got ahead of the curve, if I'm being honest with you. I was like, 'I'm just gonna get out of here, I think this is done.'

Completely selfishly, I wanted to be the first person to go and make my own record. If I'm being completely honest with you, I was like, 'I'm gonna jump the gun here for the first time.' I'm a passive dude, but when it comes to my music and my business I'm serious about it and I'm competitive, so I wanted to be the first to go and do my own thing."

In 2017 Harry discussed the hiatus in Rolling Stone:

It was in a London studio in late 2014 that Styles first brought up the idea of One Direction taking a break. “I didn’t want to exhaust our fan base,” he explains. “If you’re shortsighted, you can think, ‘Let’s just keep touring,’ but we all thought too much of the group than to let that happen. You realize you’re exhausted and you don’t want to drain people’s belief in you.”

After much discussion, the band mutually agreed to a hiatus, which was announced in August 2015 (Zayn Malik had abruptly left One D several months earlier).

Full article here

So, it’s really clear to me that yes, Harry wanted a solo career at that point, but he also could see the writing on the wall for the band.

They would need to sign another contract with Syco in 2015, probably for yet another three albums. Not only were their tours not selling out anymore, but their albums and singles weren’t doing as well as they once did, and there was no way they would survive another three tours and another three albums in another three years. It would have been madness to keep going at that pace.

And if Zayn was aware of it (as evidenced by his comment about certain people not wanting to sign contracts etc) they all were aware of it (unless the other three were blind to what was happening right in front of their faces). This idea that Harry ambushed them suddenly and that Louis, in particular, had no idea it was coming, is complete nonsense.

I think there were a lot of things going on, most of which we have no idea about, and they all needed a break. But there were probably a lot of things said and done that hurt people and it took a long time for them to be mature enough to talk about it all.

I don’t blame Zayn (or Harry) for breaking up the band. It was clearly time. I’m just sad that it ended in a way that was so emotionally difficult for them. But it does seem that Louis and Zayn have begun to mend their relationship. And yeah, I wish Liam was here to witness it.

[zolo-san]

Some thoughts on Law and his image of himself

Law clearly has a lot of conflict around being seen as "good" or a "good guy" I think he want to be a good person, and he actually is, but he doesn't see himself that way, so he has a hard time accepting when people try to suggest that he is good And I think that there are several reasons for that

Law and Survivors Guilt

Law clearly holds a lot of survivors guilt throughout his life and I think it takes a big toll on him When he was younger, not only did he out live his parents and his whole town, but he "failed" to save his little sister as well We see him go out of his way to try to save her specifically, but in the end, he's still not there when she needed him the most The loss of his family also lead him down a path of which he chose to be angry and violent (ooooo we love the stages of grief lol) and take out his feelings of guilt and resentment on others despite being raised by a family of caretakers As a doctor, his father put everything he had into trying to help the people in their town and I think that Law would have looked up to him and wanted to be just like him, but after everything that happened something really broke in him I can't help but think he would feel bad and like he failed again after he moved past the angry violent reaction - just like I think he later felt quite a bit of guilt over stabbing Corazon after the fact Corazon tried everything to save Law and gave everything to him and I think that that too would add to Law's feeling of guilt, especially because it took him so long to realize that he had been too guarded and untrusting to see that Corazon was genuinely trying to help him Once he was able to accept and recognize that, however, Corazon ended up dying shortly after Obviously, Law has a lot of guilt, specifically survivors guilt, surrounding Cora's death Corazon not only risked his life for Law to live, but Law was unable to use his fruit to save him because he didn't know how, then when Law did try to get Corazon help (against Cora's wishes) he managed to "get help" from the wrong person and put Corazon in more danger, leading to his death

Ironically this is not dissimilar to the way his sister died Law had told her to hide while he get help and not only did he not get help, but when he returned, his sister had been killed

I also think that Corazon's confession to Law about being in the navy as he was about to die adds to Law's guilt because he already knew that to be true and I think it hurt him to realize that someone who cared so deeply for him and was literally dying for him still felt bad and was worried he's disappointed him

There's also something to be said about Corazon dying with a smile and the fact that Luffy is also someone who always has a smile on his face, especially when it comes to helping others I think this very much molds the image that Law has of who a "good person" is

Law lived because he knew it was what Corazon wanted for him It was all Law could do for him (I do wonder if there's also some guilt he feels about dedicating the life Cora gave to him to revenge)

Law and Selfishness

I think Law truly sees himself as selfish for many reasons, one being that he was so driven by revenge, and I think he has a tendency to overlook the good that he does because of this

I think he even sees him saving Luffy at Marineford as a selfish act

I think that seeing the efforts that Luffy was going through to save his brother made Law feel that he had failed his sister all over again He would feel that he never tried that hard And I think that it's partly for that reason that he felt compelled to save Luffy

I can't help but feel that Law, without realizing it, was trying to absolve himself of his own "sin" of not saving his sister by saving Luffy I also think the idea of Luffy, after all his efforts failing to save Ace, really broke Law's heart and he couldn't stand the idea of Luffy having to go through something like he did, especially after all the effort Luffy put in

But because of Law's view of himself and his actions as being selfish, I think that Jinbe thanking him for helping Luffy was already too much for him He didn't see his act as selfless or "kind" he saw it as him acting in self interest and I think that's why he tries to present it as such He claims that he essentially saved Luffy because he thought it would be a shame and a waist to let someone with Luffy's potential die then and there, but I think there's so much more to it and I think a lot of it has to do with Law viewing Luffy as an actual good person and something that he's not Law leaves before Luffy can thank him because he doesn't think he deserves thanks

The next we hear of what Law did during the two years that Luffy was training, we hear about his collecting pirates' hearts and becoming a warlord He does this all as part of a plan to exact revenge on Doflamingo and as part of this plan, he leaves his crew behind with no explanation and fully expecting to never see them again (tho he doesn't tell them this) This brings up an interesting fact that even though Law claims he never intended to fight Doflamingo, he also never expected to live through it

I think that Law feels incredibly guilty about leaving his crew behind because he does really care about his crew and I think that lying to them knowing full well he's going on a suicide mission hurts him a lot But I think that despite his choice being fueled by a want to protect his crew, he would feel that it's a selfish choice When he's on Punk Hazard, Law is fully in the throws of pretending to be this other person that he isn't at heart He's trying to be that cold, selfish person he sees himself as, but I don't think he can really do it So I think for this all these reasons, Luffy's mater-of-fact declaration that he is "a good guy" would make Law incredibly uncomfortable I think he sees Luffy as the type of caring, honest, and straight forward person he wishes he could be When he thinks of a good person, he thinks of someone like Luffy - someone like Corazon - who doesn't hesitate to help others at his own risk and would die for his crew and the people he cares about

Luffy obviously shares a lot of traits with Corazon and I don't think that's lost on Law So having someone like that imply that Law is the same as him is something Law can't handle

In addition to this, I think that Luffy's willingness to fight for Law at every turn and his inherent trust in him only adds to Law's feeling of inadequacy next to Luffy And I think that his survivors guilt and the fact that he feels that he's nowhere near as good a person as Luffy are all contributing factors as to why he decides that if Luffy dies fighting for him then he has to die to

I genuinely think that the idea of surviving someone so good like Luffy (and Corazon) again is something that Law cannot handle and cannot allow to happen This is also why I can't help but think that we will see a point where Law attempts to kill himself via his fruit to save Luffy I think Law would rather he die knowing that he insured Luffy's survival than to outlive someone so kind and good Though I think there would be a lot of guilt and conflict here as well I think that whenever we get to this point, it will be abundantly clear to Law that choosing to kill himself for Luffy would also be a selfish act that Luffy would never forgive him for How could he curse Luffy to eternal life knowing that Law died to give it to him?

But regardless of Law's own self image, we see repeated examples of him actually being a good and kind person He has a strong sense of right and wrong and cannot abide injustice, especially the mistreatment of innocent, good people And even if he didn't go about things the best way when he was a kid, this feeling of right and wrong and a need for justice (not in terms of the law but more in terms of karmic, moral justice) was something that was instilled in him at a young age He was taught by his family to care for others in need and to put others before himself And he tries desperately to do so when his town is being erraticated He reaches out to Luffy at Saboady when he sees, in Luffy, the same moral values and the same demand for moral justice and fair treatment of others (something I think is very important to Law given the treatment he faces for his condition as a child) Law then saves Luffy out of compassion for him, whether he's willing to admit that out loud or not He goes out of his way to try to make sure his crew is safe when he goes on his suicide mission to take down Doflamingo and even tries to assure them that everything is fine to ease their concerns When in Dressrosa while he was obviously focused very much on Doflamingo, his plan also helped benefit so many other people in Dressrosa and the world who were suffering because of Doflamingo He also refuses, at every second, to leave Luffy's side and nearly kills himself several times in the process (not to mention taking a beaten and battered Luffy into his care for the second time at his own risk) When they get to Zou, he leaves to get to his crew fairly quickly because he want's to be sure their okay and he accepts their love and happiness at his return with no argument And when Luffy asks him about altering the plan so he can go get Sanji, Law's first thought is of the people of Zou

I think this is partly because he can't stand the injustice of what happened to them, but also because he knows that insuring their saftey is something very important to Bepo since it is his home country and his people (even if he didn't really grow up there)

The people of Zou thank Law for this and he immediately shrugs it off because he doesn't see himself as someone worth thanking (especailly not after he heard of all the good the strawhats did - how could he compare?) Despite it all tho, Law makes room for Luffy - he accommodates Luffy's request because he knows how important it is to him to get Sanji back And again, he does this all selflessly and at his own risk, tho he doesn't see it as such, Law changes his plan to help Luffy and he does so without really any hesitation

There are other examples of Law going out of his way to do good and be a good person despite the image he has of himself (I'm just currently only just finishing up Zou so I haven't gotten there yet, I just know things~)

But in short, Law clearly doesn't see himself as "good," tho he desperately want to be a good person, but regardless of how Law views himself, he is clearly "a good guy"

[slcmml]

charlie & reader. fluff, slightly suggestive.

★ charlie is usually fine being away for work—he’s used to traveling, used to filming for days at a time—but being away from you? suddenly, it’s the worst thing in the world.

★ the moment he gets to cali for chuckle sandwich recording, his phone is practically glued to his hand. texting you between takes, sending voice memos, calling when he has even five spare minutes.

★ you’re just as bad. even though you’re busy with your own work, you keep checking your phone, sending him messages like:

you: i miss u so much baby :(

charlie: miss u more, babe <3 i hate it here w/o u

you: don’t let schlatt bully u too much lol

charlie: too late. he said my hair looks stupid.

you: gaslight him into thinking he’s bald.

charlie: ur so smart. this is why i love u.

★ facetime calls at night where both of you are half-asleep, but neither of you want to hang up first.

★ “just stay on the phone,” charlie mumbles, voice thick with sleep. “i don’t care if you’re quiet, just wanna feel like ‘m with you.”

★ when you finally get time to call during the day, charlie’s grinning like an idiot the second your face pops up on his screen. “holy shit, you’re even prettier than i remember,” he teases, making you roll your eyes.

★ you both send each other the dumbest updates. blurry selfies, random thoughts, voice messages that are just exaggerated sighs of longing.

you: wish i could be in ur arms rn.

charlie: wish i could kiss ur dumb face.

you: wish i could hold ur hand and rub circles into ur palm like u like.

charlie: wish i could bite u. nom nom.

you: BABE.

charlie: morning, baby. how’d you sleep?

you: not great. bed feels weird without you.

charlie: mine too. i kept reaching out for you last night :(

you: we are so pathetic.

charlie: mhm. now gimme a kiss.

you: mwah.

charlie: not enough. i need like. ten.

you: mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah. <3

charlie: much better. i’ll be thinking about that all day.

charlie: wish i could burrow into ur skin and live there forever.

you: what the fuck.

charlie: don’t act like u wouldn’t let me.

you: no i absolutely would.

charlie: see? we’re the same.

charlie: i miss u so bad i might start chewing on furniture.

you: wish that was me.

charlie: chewing on furniture?

you: no, in ur mouth.

charlie: oh my god.

★ if either of you have a bad day, the other immediately drops everything to comfort them over the phone. charlie’s voice is soft, sweet, telling you how much he loves you, how proud he is of you, how he wishes he could hold you.

★ sometimes you both get really freaky over text but it’s either the most unserious conversation ever or it’s the neediest conversation ever?

charlie: [selfie]

you: oh my fucking god u are so handsome im gonna jerk it so hard tonight

charlie: oh word? u better bc im thinking abt u rn and i might just bust it down sensually in ur honor

you: i need u so bad rn :(

charlie: yeahh? what do u need baby ill do my best to please u <3

you: [selfie]

charlie: gonna go absolutely feral in the bathroom thinking abt this

you: dont threaten me w a good time

★ the moment he’s done with recording and you’re done with work, the countdown begins.

charlie: TWO MORE DAYS BABY I’M GONNA KISS U SO HARD WHEN I SEE U

you: not if i kiss u first, been waiting all week for that shit

★ when you’re finally back together? oh, you’re not leaving each other’s side for at least a week. fully attached at the hip, constantly touching, making up for every second apart.

© slcmml