#and i know he has so much support and i know he wants to help. but he can’t find a therapist with his insurance right now

[asgardian--angels]

**URGENT** HELP SAVE THE USGS BEE LAB!

PLEASE circulate this as widely as possible, as soon as possible.

Hi all, you may not know me but I am a native bee researcher in the eastern US. People like me work to study and protect the 3600 species of native bees in North America, many of which are in severe decline.

We just received devastating news, that unfortunately was not surprising. The Trump administration's proposed 2026 budget is set to defund most of the ecological research happening at the USGS, and that includes zeroing out the budget for the USGS Native Bee Inventory & Monitoring Lab.

Don't know them? Maybe you've seen stunning photos like this:

These gorgeous and evocative focus-stacked photos of native bees on black backgrounds - all of which are public domain - come from the USGS Bee Lab (here's their Flickr). Through these, they've helped bring the beauty and importance of native bees to the public's attention. Hundreds if not thousands of news articles, videos, and publications use these photos.

But that is just one tiny slice of what the USGS Bee Lab does for pollinator conservation. Its primary role is much bigger; they provide technical support, research collaborations, and financial & grant partnerships to federal and state agencies, academic institutions and researchers, and much more, so we can study, manage, and protect North America's wild pollinators. They conduct research of their own that has led to species rediscoveries, and produce invaluable resources that have greatly advanced our understanding of wild bees and our approaches to studying and conserving them. They also provide the essential and irreplaceable service of bee identification. For those who don't know, identifying bees is hard. Sometimes Really Hard. And this lab is one of just a handful of places in the entire country who can identify some of the toughest groups of bees, and who sit on the forefront of breakthroughs on taxonomy and identification that the rest of us in this field rely on. Without this service, agencies and researchers trying to survey and monitor bees in order to track population declines, manage land, and get policy changed are stuck with a lot of nameless bees, severely limiting the usefulness of that data.

Tens of thousands, if not hundreds of thousands, of bee specimens pass through this lab annually, plus the thousands in permanent storage, from long-term monitoring efforts by state and federal agencies, and researchers like myself. They operate at a greater capacity than basically any other institution doing this kind of work. Few if any bee researchers in the eastern US, or even the country, have not benefitted from this lab's work, and those benefits are passed on to you through being able to protect pollinators and the services they provide both in agriculture and ecosystems.

This lab is headed up by scientist Sam Droege, who has dedicated decades of his life to this cause, and whom I consider not just a research partner but, humbly, a friend. I am utterly indebted to him for helping me get my start in this field, and for the support and kindness he has shown me and every other young professional who is passionate about pollinators. The Lab operates with an insanely small budget already, and a very limited staff, yet the impact they have is exponentially outsized. Losing the USGS Bee Lab would be a devastating blow to pollinator conservation in this country, at a time when native bee species are sitting on the precipice, and sustainable agriculture is non-negotiable for our future.

You can read more about the Bee Lab here. The Lab is not well-publicized, but it's a lifeline for the many dedicated people who work to try and protect pollinators and the environment at large.

SO WHAT CAN YOU DO?

Sam Droege has sent out a request for help, and has encouraged us to post on social media. This is what he wants you to do to help us save the Bee Lab.

This is verbatim:

What is Happening: ·       The USGS Bee Lab is at risk of being permanently closed due to cuts in the 2026 Federal Budget and looming federal RIF’s ·       Specifically, the Ecosystem Mission Area (EMA) budget, which funds the USGS Bee Lab and the Eastern Ecological Science center has been zeroed out ·       Thousands of layoffs to hit Interior, National Parks imminently - Government Executive What you can do ·       Write to your representatives, the White House, and the Department of the Interior that they should restore the funding for the USGS Bee Lab ·       Send digital or physical letters, write emails, post to social media What you should be highlighting: ·       Personal anecdotes about how the Bee Lab has impacted you or your organization ·       How important the research the Bee Lab is conducting is to your state Contact Information: 1.      Representatives: Find Your Representative | house.gov 2.      Senators: U.S. Senate: Contacting U.S. Senators 3.      White House: Contact Us – The White House 4.      Interior: feedback@ios.doi.gov Send a copy of the letter to droegesam@gmail.com Pass this email around.  Post your response to social media

IT'S OK if you are not a scientist and have not directly interacted with the Bee Lab. Have you seen the lab's photos? Are you concerned about native pollinator declines? Are you aware of any pollinator conservation initiatives or policies in your own state - those almost certainly have drawn, directly or indirectly, from work the Lab has done. Speak about American food production and agriculture, how the Lab's research and collaborations are essential to safeguarding pollination services (this might help reach across the aisle).

Sam urges that these letters, emails, phone calls, etc, must happen quickly - within the next couple days. This information went out on May 8th and that is the day I am posting this. So please, don't wait.

If 'save the bees' has ever meant anything to you, this is the agency that is playing one of the biggest roles in this country in making that happen. Please, contact your representatives, and pass this call to action along however you can. Thank you.

[thebestpartofwakingup]

Not to mention how rude, inconsiderate, dishonest, disrespectful, and potentially harmful (to both you and others) to navigate the world and your life and public spaces — presenting as a competent adult (yes I am aware that visibly disabled adults are often not treated in the same manner) without respecting the responsibility of agency that being an adult carries.

Yes, there are plenty of 20 somethings who do look like teenagers and may be treated as such, in public, by older adults. It happens, it’s sometimes awkward, but it is not a universal script for how you — an adult who knows they are an adult, should present themselves and expect to be treated by others in return.

People make mistakes! Its ok to ask for help, or take up a bit more time or space than is situationally ideal (say, fumbling with your wallet at the cashier) these are not like “you are bad and evil and stupid” everyone has fluctuations in like, overall competence and awareness, everyone gets caught off guard.

I live in a large city, there are lots of places and people I visit regularly, people I see around my usual spots often, people who see me around commonly, and also lots of people I may never see again in the mix.

Ive given my bus seat up to other people before, let families go ahead of me for the bathroom, ive dealt with men making unwanted comments towards me — on a whole range of ‘ew what a creep’ and ‘he means well’ — and had homeless people sit down at my table at various libraries, cafes, malls, etc.

Uncomfortable, inconvenient things happen all the time! Things happen all the time that require, and easily allow, us to provide grace and help to strangers (especially to parents/kids and the homeless, since they are often/commonly the people most visibly in need of grace and extra patience than we would maybe expect or require from strangers ourselves)

Now I’m leftist/progressive (never been one for like, grand political strategy, so more specific labels aren’t really my thing) and so are the majority of my friends, or some other related political identity. People who value inclusion and diversity and accommodating and accepting other people.

And I cannot count the number of times a planned social outing has spiraled out of control because someone in attendance did not communicate with anyone else, prior to the event, that this activity is well outside their comfort zone and may become too much for them, or that they’ll require additional supervision, or do not have *transportation/ a plan for getting home*

And this has even extended to social gatherings planned AROUND supporting someone else’s communicated needs. “My grandma died and I don’t want to be alone right now” “my partner dumped me and I wanna go out and feel good about myself” “work has been killing me lately and I really need a relaxing night with my best friends” etc.

It’s ok, good even, to push yourself outside your comfort zone! But it’s unbelievably rude to do so in a way where your plan for doing so directly interrupts or diminishes the needs and experiences of the people around you because you did not communicate your needs.

I think mostly what young fandom types (and I guess younger people in general) who are very very invested in the idea that “20 is still basically a minor” need to understand is that the feeling of “I’m just a child pretending to be an adult, and everyone else around me is a REAL adult” is DEEPLY universal (and won’t stop, ever, by the way, sorry!) and also is not, like, praxis.

Believe me, I get it, but the self-infantilization needs to stop, especially when you’re trying to engage in conversations about actual children and the harms they can face. Yes, it is scary to wake up and realize you’re 22 and you still feel like you’re 15, but it happens to all of us. You’re an adult. You have to deal with it.

[unteriors]

I assume you’ve probably answered this before, but what exactly is the underlying politics of this blog? I don’t quite understand the connection between neoliberal capitalism and pictures of desolate housing listings.

Thanks if you take the time to reply! -anon

We live in a bizarre intermediate period where capitalism appears to be eating itself. I originally came across the Gramsci quote in the header via Noam Chomsky in 2015/2016, when he was using it to refer to the pre-Trump lunacy that was taking over the Republican Party. In the US, this seems to have been a sort of cancerous outgrowth of decades of austerity and privatisation and deregulation that began with the end of Bretton Woods and took off in earnest in the 80s under Reagan. Similar processes have been at work to varying degrees across much of the world, throbbing occasionally with particular enthusiasm depending on the elected government, abating temporarily during other periods of Third Way-ite labour stagnation. Housing is at the core of these recent historical trends, and of the relationship between the government and its citizens. I don't know if it could exactly be called the main driving factor, but it plays an enormous role in how we work, how we form relationships, and how we interface with society generally. I remember reading a quote from a conservative politician in the UK in the 80s, responding to a question about why they didn't build more public housing to address the growing homelessness problem; he said something to the effect of 'that would just breed another generation of Labour voters.' I think the cannier politicians (and business leaders) are very aware of their capacity to shape our lives through housing like this.

A similar process has been at work in my country since World War II. We had a succession of two very good Labor Prime Ministers during the 1940s: John Curtin and Ben Chifley. They developed our version of the vast postwar public housing programs that most Western countries had. This provided stable, affordable (or often just free) housing for a huge chunk of the population who wouldn't have had access to it before the war. After Chifley, a conservative government under Robert Menzies came to power in a wave of anti-communist hysteria. Menzies appealed directly to a class of the population which he called the 'forgotten people': people in the middle strata of society who, in his characterisation, didn't get involved in trade unions or radical political organisations, didn't protest, and just wanted to get on with their lives in an apolitical solitude. In reality, this was less of a class of people that already existed and more one he set out to proactively create. He did this, in part, by altering the public housing scheme to give the baby boomers the right to buy the property the government had given them. This entrenched home ownership and, arguably, introduced a level of scarcity to the public housing stock in the long-run, and set the groundwork for later government support of housing as a financial asset, guaranteed to appreciate. It also, in a way, helped create that class of 'quiet' Australian: a solid middle 75-80% of the population that could be guaranteed a comfortable, suburban lifestyle, within an apolitical bubble quietly guaranteed by interventions into the economy by the government and regulation of the housing market in their favour. Over the years, this proportion of the population has gradually decreased, more markedly so since the overt financialisation of housing under John Howard in the early 2000s, and it's fallen off a cliff since COVID.

There's a tradition in art that I've been interested in for a while which involves broadening creative fields (in artmaking or criticism) through direct engagement with fields of work, of machine production, of lived experience or other symptoms of the oppressive political reality we live under (realism in the Linda Nochlin sense). You see it in the controversy around Courbet's paintings of manual workers, much of Andy Warhol's work and general contempt for the art world (his silkscreens of graphic photos of car crashes he found in the newspaper stand out to me), or more recently some of the controversy that came from Tracey Emin's installations. More broadly, there's something to be said about the conscious effort to make transparent and use aesthetically the machine behind the reproduction, or distribution, or amplification, etc., of art. The use of feedback in music seem to me to be an example of this. To use a couple of examples of a period of music I'm particularly interested in, grunge is one example, but so are reggae sound systems which use custom-made valve amps that give an enormous low-end to vinyls they would play, to the point of using the records as instruments to create a sort of rumbling distortion (Jah Shaka's sessions seem to have premediated alternative rock, operating on parallel tracks). These forms of creative production seem to organically emerge from the detritus of industrialisation, and seem to respond to its alienation and atomisation of human relations. I'm interested in breaking the functionality of illegitimate systems. At uni I took a series of photographs of the backs of shops. There was something comforting in identifying how a commercial entity wanted to be presented visually, and then representing it in the exact opposite way. Similarly, though I don't know if this could be considered an art project, I like an incompetent realtor. The aesthetic qualities of a real estate listing that completely fails in its intended purpose can be quite rich, in some ways liberating. An enormous amount of imagery is generated by the institutional machinery of commercial institutions, much of it ephemeral. If you rescue some visual artifacts from this increasingly engorged flood and look at them against their intended purpose you get a little window into the broader world, where advertising agencies and algorithms and real estate agents and SEI specialists, etc., aren't constantly grabbing your face and forcing you to look at the most boring and monetisable parts of the visual world. You have the opportunity to experience fear, hate, genuine nostalgia and melancholy, various other complex passionate experiences inaccessible in the neoliberal digital machine perversion of visual culture and creative experience.

This is a kind of a roundabout way of answering your question. Maybe part of my motivation has something to do with the relationship between art and work. If you reject the art as some higher, privileged category interpretation (i.e. this is just a photograph, but this other photograph is Art), then the boundaries of what constitutes art, or what can be read as art, are pretty porous. The machinery of industrialisation and capitalism took away the ability of people working in home workshops to have some control and creative involvement in their own working lives and turned them into atomised, specialised machine parts at the mercy of their employers and the market. The parts of work that could be considered contiguous with what we call art have been severed. Art and artists have suffered the same effects; contemporary artists seem to me not that different from other independent professionals. If you go to a dentist's office on Cambridge Street in Perth they'll often have a brochure with a blurb about their history and their mission as medical professionals, etc., on the front counter, and by the same token every artist in an exhibition is taught to provide their own little didactic overview of their niche interests, mostly independent from deeper, shared commitments (lumped together like a sack of potatoes, per Marx). I feel it makes sense to reach back out into other parts of the economy force art into them.

[oneofstarkskids]

redemption

THUNDERBOLTS* END CREDITS SPOILERS:

genre; angst with a splash of fluff

summary: bucky knows that even when he feels like there's no one he can rely on, nobody who's willing to stay, you'll be right there beside him.

"it went poorly," bucky tells yelena about his call to sam. part of bucky wanted to be angry with sam.

how could he sit there, knowing this was what bucky's always wanted- purpose, redemption- and try to take it away from him?

at the same time, bucky felt almost guilty. like it was his own fault. he should've done something. said something. told everyone it was another one of valentina's scams.

but he couldn't. not when there were so many people cheering and chanting for him. they weren't calling him the winter soldier. a monster. not a criminal, but an avenger.

a true hero.

he went home to you, heart feeling heavy.

"hey sweetheart," you greeted him at the door, wrapping your arms around his neck.

you ran your hands through his blown out curls, brushing them out of his pretty face. you noticed the tired look in his eyes. "everything okay?"

he sighed before pulling you into him, caging you against him in a crushing embrace.

you didn't push the matter. you just let him hold you like that for as long as he needed, and eventually he sat down and confided in you.

"sam called," he started, but paused. you smiled a bit at the mention of your friend. he'd been there countless times for both you and bucky.

bucky had gone to visit him about a year ago, but it had been awhile since you had talked to him without having to dial his number.

"how is he?" you asked.

"he's suing me," he said flatly. you furrowed your brows and shook your head, trying to wrap your mind around it. "well, not just me, the new avengers. for copyright."

it suddenly made sense.

"oh, bucky," you sat down next to him, interlocking his metal fingers with your flesh ones.

he kept his gaze on the floor, "he was pissed. and maybe he has every right to be."

you didn't say anything. what could you say?

you could see it from sam's point of view. he was an avenger. and he'd lost so many of his teammates.

bucky had even told you that sam was planning to rebuild the avengers a while back. you were so sure that he would've asked bucky to join.

but it looks like he never got the chance.

and bucky. your bucky. this meant so much to him. it's not like he went out searching for it. this team, these lonely, messed up people, just happened to fall right in his lap.

they were just like him. people who'd fucked up beyond redemption.

but here they were, getting the clean slate each of them had only ever dreamt of.

he was supposed to throw that all away?

he rested his forehead on your shoulder, "i don't know what to do. you know, after steve..." you waited for him to finish, knowing it was a rough topic.

"after steve left, i thought i would never have that kind of bond with anyone else," he whispered.

"besides you, of course," he looked up at you with a lopsided grin.

you smiled back, softly.

"but then sam and i...we really started to understand each other. we were forced to work together, and despite him being an annoying pain in my ass... he's filled the emptiness that steve left behind." his face contorts with pain.

you took his face into your hands, thumbs brushing across his cheeks.

"what if he never forgives me?" he asks the question that leaves the room thick with the loss and pain he's lived with his entire life.

you shook your head once more, "buck, don't say that. he's sam. he's pissed off, probably hurting, but he loves you."

"a brief argument over the phone is never going to change that. you two will work this out," you said confidently. it helped that you truly believed the words coming out of your mouth.

there were some bumps in the road of bucky and sam's relationship, but ultimately, they were the captain and his sergeant. inseparable.

bucky was in awe of you. your unwavering faith in him. your never-ending love and support. his blue eyes shined with affection.

"i'm glad that it's you by my side, doll," he whispered. "even if nobody else is."

you pressed your forehead against his and frowned, "which they are."

he couldn't help but chuckle at how adamant you were.

"c'mere," he lifted your chin slightly and kissed you tenderly, his love for you evident in the way his lips lingered against your own.

[inkdrinkerworld]

Till The Bitter End

cw: angst, LOTS of hurt/comfort, reader’s an ex widow, Yelena and reader friendship, Bucky is very supportive, reader is haunted a little by their actions as a widow (mentioned no detail), sadness and slight depression representation! Thunderbolts mini spoilers (there’s mention of the team), my first time writing for him so maybe a tad ooc but also very post fatws and cabnw Bucky vibe as well!

You’re not a part of his life anymore, you have to keep reminding yourself of that. 

You’re an ex-widow. A black widow, a killing machine and he's a congressman now. 

You can’t be there, you can’t be in his house, in his bed. You just can’t. 

One look into you, one quick search and they’ll know everything you’ve done. All the people you’ve killed, all the blood on your hands. Sure they’d forgiven Bucky, he hadn’t had a choice. He was The Winter Soldier; you were just you. A black widow, full consciousness, full ‘choice.’ 

To his credit, Bucky had tried to keep you. He’d tried to make it so that you wouldn’t feel like you’d had to leave, but he knows you. Knew you. 

You didn’t want to make things bad for him, for his chance to make a positive difference. It wasn’t even that Bucky couldn’t find you, you asked him not to. You made him swear on Steve that he wouldn’t find you. 

Then you left, and you regretted it everyday. Bucky regretted the promise too. 

You couldn’t stay in DC, not for a while, so you’d packed your bags and told Yelena you were going on a vacation. 

You’d been to Italy, Spain, then Germany, but your heart pulled you out of there quickly. 

After weeks of deliberating and talking yourself out of it, you finally worked up enough nerve to settle in Romania for a bit. 

It was every bit as beautiful as you had remembered. The history was vast and it was the last place you and Bucky had been truly happy. 

Your old neighbours remembered you, and when they asked after Bucky your chest ached something red hot, like a poker left in the fireplace. 

You managed to hold it out just until the plums were everywhere and then you had to leave. 

The pain of missing him but seeing him in everything was too much, and you had to come home. 

Not knowing where you were kept Bucky up at night. Yelena hadn’t told him you weren’t in Dc about a month into your ‘vacation’ and he was tempted to break his promise and ask Joaquin to find you. 

Then she’d called him and said, “She is home. Do not come looking for her. There is too much sadness.” 

Bucky hated the regret that swam its way deep between his ribs, settling deep inside of him like that had always been its place. Still, he understood. He didn’t begrudge you the distance you wanted. He knows all too well how it feels to be backed into a corner and forced to stay someplace where it feels like you can’t breathe. 

So he let you have your distance, to clear your head or whatever it was you needed even though he hated not having you close.  

At least he knew you had Yelena. 

You were rotting in bed when Yelena came back to the apartment, she was in her suit and you barely registered her till she was on your bed. 

“Up, you need fresh air. I will not let you drown in sorrows anymore.” 

She reaches over you and yanks your curtains open, sunlight shining through the room. 

You roll your eyes. She’s trying to be helpful, but this hurts. 

It hurts because you want to be with Bucky. You want to help with whatever is going on or going to be going on. 

You just can’t force yourself to stop worrying about the potentiality of things going horribly if you do help. 

“Yelena.” 

She cuts you off, her hand slicing through the air to stop whatever it is you’d had to say. 

“No, you helped me when I was like this. Now I help you. Go take a shower, you stink.” 

There’s no room to argue with her when she gets serious like this, but you don’t make it easy for her. She has to practically haul you to your feet and into the bathroom, blasting cold water on you to help snap you out of whatever funk you’re in. 

“Be quick, we have places to be.” 

You furrow your brows, you never have anywhere to be. That’s why you’ve been laying around in the apartment with all the windows closed and the lights off. 

You don’t have the energy to argue and shower so you leave it at that. 

You hear Yelena whispering on the phone outside the bathroom door, but there’s only so much you can make out. 

“She’s not doing good.” Silence as she listens and then her response. 

“I think this is bullshit, but okay. You are the boss.” 

You really don’t know who she’s speaking to, but you can guess. 

By the time you’re finished getting dressed, you have to scoff at how predictable the Red Room has made you and Yelena. 

You’re in black pants and a black sleeveless top fitted to your body; lest you get attacked. No need giving anyone more of you to hold. Your hair’s in two braids pinned to your head as well. 

“You look depressing.” It’s easy for you and Yelena to speak like this; you’ve pulled each other out of ruts like the one you’re in now and a certain degree of bluntness has always been necessary. 

“That’s how I feel, Yelena. Where are you taking me?” 

She shrugs, a bowl of what smells like Mac and cheese sits on her lap, spoon waved around as she chooses her words. 

“We are going for walk. You need the fresh air.” 

Your walk is mostly silent, Yelena understands what you’re going through better than most. Memories of all the horrible things you’ve done are swirling in your head like the beginnings of a hurricane over the water. You didn’t want to be part of their team for this- you don’t know how to reconcile your guilt. 

When you pass by Bucky’s apartment you freeze. 

Yelena walks in and smiles at the doorman, he smiles at you too but you can’t make your feet walk through the threshold. 

“Come on. You need to at least tell him to his face all that you are feeling. It makes no sense that you sit and mope and wallow alone. He is sad too.” 

You shake your head. “I’m going to ruin his entire congressman thing, Yelena.” 

She rolls her eyes, pushing back a few strands of hair from her eyes. “You are both hard headed. You will not ruin things, you’re just going to talk with him.” 

You try glaring at her, keeping your eyes hard but then you smell his cologne; smell that cedarwood and mint you love and you crumble. 

“James?” He’s standing ten feet behind Yelena and when she sees him she nods. 

“Hurt her Barnes, I know how to take that arm off.” She turns to you, a hand resting on your shoulder. “Talk it out. Get it out of you and come home.” 

He shakes his head at her, waiting until she’s gone before approaching you. 

“I don’t think I can do this,” You whisper and if Bucky’s hurt he masks it well. His hair looks a little longer, brushing under his jaw now. He doesn’t look well, there’s dark circles under his eyes, his face looks paler than usual and from what you can see he’s lost weight. 

Your stomach sours at the idea that he’s not been taking care of himself because of you. Your hands wrap around your middle instinctively at the thought. 

“We have to talk it out, doll.” He says softly and you meet his eyes for the first time. 

They’re still that striking blue that steals your breath. God you’ve missed looking into them. 

“We can go up to my apartment or we can go to that corner store you like.” 

You shake your head, “I don’t want anyone to see us.”

Bucky sighs, a sharp exhale and you cringe at how your words replay in your head. 

He doesn’t say anything and gestures for you to follow him. 

When you get up to his apartment, Bucky makes you a cup of tea exactly the way you like it. You rub your chest to release the pressure building behind it. 

“Thanks,” you whisper, not missing the fact that he’s used your favourite mug in his house. 

“I don’t think there’s any reason for this not to work.” 

You can’t help but smile at the bluntness of his words. Like you’d said, bluntness is appreciated. 

“I can give you five right now.” 

Bucky crosses his arms as he sits in the arm chair across from you. “Give them to me.”

His metal fingers flex when you take a long sip of your tea. You sigh before speaking. 

“For one thing, my past isn’t public knowledge or pretty and if we were together and I was attending all your congress meetings and being seen with you at those galas, people would just dig to find the worst of what I’ve done.”

Bucky shakes his head, “I was the Winter Soldier and they let me be congressman doll.”

You scoff, “You also stopped Thanos and brought people back after the blip and helped Sam rehabilitate those displaced from the blip.” 

Bucky doesn’t say anything then. There’s not much to say, he had exonerated that past. People like a tortured man, they could forgive a man for his wrongs especially if they looked like Bucky. There’s a certain appeal to a tortured man getting better. 

You’re not sure there’s anything like that for a tortured woman, and you know society doesn’t like women that are hard to control and that’s what you’ve always been. 

“I don’t want to ruin the life you’ve just started having James. It was hard before you became congressman, I knew how waking you up screaming from nightmares was torturing you again.” you shake your head at the memories. “I couldn’t keep doing that to you. I won’t do that to you.”

You’re on a roll now. “I don’t want to be another person’s pawn. I don’t want to become a part of their game and even if you’re on the inside of it, we’ll still be working for them. We can’t even trust them and I don’t trust that they’re not up to something.”

Bucky can understand that part, not wanting to be a pawn, but this was what he and Sam had worked on. At least to some extent. 

“Anything else, doll?” To anyone else, it would sound patronizing, but Bucky genuinely wants to know if there’s anything else rattling around your brain and worrying you. 

You take a few minutes to answer. “Those are the major ones.”

He nods, and tries for a smile. “Not five though.” 

You scowl, but it’s not nearly as severe as it could be. 

It’s clear to you Bucky doesn’t agree with you. The man doesn’t have a subtle bone in his body and it’s glaringly obvious that he’s relishing in your closeness as he leans forward, the tips of his fingers brushing your knee. 

“Doll,” he looks up at you through his lashes, his eyes intense as he holds your gaze. “You weren’t torturing me. I didn’t know how to make it safer for you to sleep and that shit ate me alive. I never told you, but after you fell asleep again I’d stay up, watching you for hours trying to figure out if there was some way to tell before the nightmares were starting so I could get you out of them before they started.” 

Your heart lurches. 

Bucky takes your silence as permission to continue. 

“Your past is yours, if you don’t want anyone digging around in it, I get it. I can ask Joaquin to seal the documents, I could seal the documents. I could erase them if you wanted too.”

You sniffle and Bucky smiles sadly. “You can’t decide that I don’t want you. We promised we wouldn’t do that, do you remember?” 

You nod, the memory coming back fast. 

It was just after Thanos, you’d been blipped and when Steven had gotten everyone back, you were running to Bucky. You just needed to see him, to know that he was okay. It wasn’t the time, there was still Thanos to defeat and then Tony died, but the night of his funeral when you were laying in Bucky’s bed, your head on his chest he’d made you promise. 

“No matter what, we don’t sacrifice ourselves and we don’t decide things for the other person.” 

His voice was thin and hollow that night, but there had been underlying hopefulness seeping through his words. 

You’d sat up, your knees pressing into the space near his hip. Your hands reached for his face, you had smiled at the stubble there. 

“I promise, Bucky. We’ll stick it out till the bitter end.” You dropped back on the bed next to him, fingers tracing the planes of his chest. 

He had laughed, kissed your forehead and held you to him tightly. “Till the bitter end, doll.” 

“I don’t want to disappoint you Buck. I’ve been just wallowing in missing you, I couldn’t even stay in Romania for more than a month because you were everywhere. Yelena had to help me shower and I was the one who wanted this to end. What a coward you must think of me.”

Your breath catches on the last of your words and Bucky can’t restrain himself anymore. He tugs you to the armchair with him, tucking you into the corner with a hand on your hip. 

“You’re not a coward.” There’s a hint of finality to his words. “You couldn’t disappoint me ever, doll.” There’s grief building in Bucky’s chest at the thought of you alone in Romania. There’s so many memories of you both together in that little house and he knows you still have your key. 

There’s also heartbreak at the fact that you think you’ve disappointed him. Bucky’s been amazed by everything you’ve ever done. 

“I’ve not been any better, but we’re working on it now, yeah?” 

You nod, shutting your eyes and letting the tears fall. Being this close to Bucky is like a balm to all the mangled and splintered edges of your heart. Just the pressure of his hand on your hip is enough, not to mention the weight of his side pressing into yours. 

“I really missed you.” you hiccup and he chuckles, holding you a little tighter. 

“You haunted all my dreams, doll.” Bucky’s metal arm reaches for a strand of hair that’s caressing your cheek. “I know you don’t want to be their pawn, and I won’t let you be. You’re not going to get roped into it as long as I can help it.”

You sit quietly for a time after that. You’re not sure what to say, so you say nothing and just let your tears fall and let Bucky hold you. 

“If you don’t want to be part of the team, I won’t force you. But I want another chance at us.” He whispers the words sometime later and you look up at him, dried tears like rivers on your cheeks, eyes bloodshot. 

“Even with all the sad thoughts?”

Bucky smiles, his hand stroking your face. “Especially with all the sad thoughts. We don’t live through what we did and just go on, baby. We work for it, and I know you’re trying.” 

You sigh, tipping your head on his shoulder. “Yelena is whipping me into shape, she’s not letting me wallow everyday.” He laughs then, because Bucky can see her doing it. 

“She’s a good friend.” 

You lay in silence for some time again, Bucky’s breathing settling you a little. 

You’re not sure if you’d fallen asleep, but the sun has gone down when your phone rings. 

“Did you talk things out? Are you better for now?” 

You smile, you really do love Yelena. 

“We talked it through. M’giving it another shot.” 

Yelena hums, “So you’re part of the team?” 

You sigh, “I don’t know about that yet. But I’m trying with Bucky again.” You feel the man smile against your shoulder. 

“Good. You are not alone and you can’t do it alone, we can help.” 

Your throat clogs with tears, “You’re a great friend, Yelena.” 

She blows a raspberry, “I saved you from poison arrow and you never left me alone after. I am the best friend.” 

You laugh, some of the warmth sneaking back into you. 

“I’ll be home in the morning Yelena. Make sure to lock the door.” 

“Criminals are scared of me. Have a good night.” 

You hang up after a few more minutes, body heavy with fatigue. 

“Ready for bed?” 

You nod, slipping from the armchair and starting towards Bucky’s bedroom. 

You’ve not forgotten your way around this place.

Bucky is pleased at that fact. 

You sit on his bed, slipping out of your shirt and pants, Bucky doesn’t hesitate to get your usual pyjamas; a pair of his boxers and an old red Henley. 

When you slip into your side of the bed Bucky’s eyes go glassy. 

“I’ve missed seeing you in there.” 

You smile as he lays beside you, your head laying on his warm shoulder.  

“I missed being here.”

[gay-dorito-dust]

Hi hi!!! Can I request Bob and Void relationship headcanons please! Love your work and I hope you have a good day!

Void’s section of this is possessive, controlling and kinda manipulative in a way, so I might as well put that out there for you all.

Bob is the sweetest man who’s been given the hardest time, yet he still smiles and is warm and beautiful and gentle with how he goes through your relationship with you.

Seriously this man thinks he’s the luckiest person in existence to have you in his life, he’s always waking up everyday with the thought that you were with him, it’s enough to have him smile and feel giddy and feel as if he could do anything. (He literally can do anything, he’s powerful and invincible)

Yet while all the power he has, you made him feel the most powerful in his entire life and he couldn’t even explain just how much you mean to him, he could try but feared he’d only trip up on his words and just end up sheepish and apologising for not being able to get his words straight.

But seriously you’ve blessed this man in ways you can barely understand. You’ve given him hope, security, a safe haven for when he has his really bad days and been nothing but an encouraging force when he has his good days and did the smallest things like get out of bed or shower.

Your support and understanding of his situation was something he thought he’d never get, something he feared he be called a burden for, and yet you stood by him no matter what and still confidently called him the man you loved with your whole heart and nothing less.

You didn’t see no reason to view him less when he was unable to get out of bed, but instead you kept him company and made sure he was comfortable, you reminded him that you weren’t going anywhere if he wasn’t going. You wanted to stay with him and gently kiss his forehead, caress your fingers across his dark bag and press your forehead against his and just stay there as though you were trying to reach his thoughts and tell them to cut him some slack.

All Bob could do during those low point was be on the brink of tears with how gently you cared for him while still being from enough to remind him that he should at least eat or drink a little, you didn’t care about missing out on anything, not when your partner was internally suffering and you’d gladly care for him until he wasn’t able to make it past his bedroom door. He didn’t believe that he deserved you at most time but you’d always peck him on the lips before he could even finish the sentence.

‘You are just as deserving of anything just like anyone else, if not more and I will not have you talk down on yourself, you are my partner and I will stand by your side whenever you need me to.’ You tell him earnestly, holding his face within your hands. ‘You need me and I need you just as much, if not more, I’m not leaving you to rot when I know I can at least be of some help. I love you too much to be so heartless and shallow.’

Hugs are a thing you do when words fail you, you just hold each other closely, foreheads pressed to one another as you just allowed your gently caresses and calm breathing speak how you felt at ease and at peace with one another. It was a difficult start when Bon would flinch when your hands touched his cheeks, so you took it one step at a time until he was poetically refusing to let go of your wrists, keeping your hands pressed to his cheeks as he melts in your touch, memorising it as best as he could while looking at you adoringly.

He made you feel seen and loved in a way that left you speechless, breathless but in the best way. You wanted all of his love and you didn’t have to say much to get it either as he was eager to give it to you with the soft, uncertain kisses he left upon your cheek or forehead and smiling sheepishly afterwards as he asks if he did good with burning cheeks.

‘You always do good for me baby.’ You replied, which only made his cheeks burn redder as his smile stretched across his face.

His hands can barely stay still for a single second. They need to be doing something and they’re favouring to do? Fiddle with your fingers or hold onto some part of you when you were within reach, whether it be your shirt, jacket sleeve or jeans. Bob’s fingers will fiddle with it or your fingers as you intertwine your hands, allowing him to caress your knuckles with his thumb or squeeze your hand three times to tell you he loved you.

Loving Bob was a dream come true for you, loving you was a dream come true for Bob, loving each other as deeply and a truly as you two did was something envied by all as a love as innocent and pure as yours was surly the stuff of romance books and happily ever after. You were his guiding light and he was your golden guardian.

Bob gets incredibly flustered when you wear his sweatshirts, seriously as if you couldn’t be more beautiful in this man’s eyes, you had to go and steal his sweater and make this man’s heart go into overdrive. He’s staring at you the entire day like a lovesick puppy until someone (John the prick) tells him that he’s staring and suddenly you were far too precious for him to look at.

You secretly loved his adoring staring and his inability to look away, so you smack John in the back of his head for being a prick towards your lover, saying that if there was anyone allowed to look at you it was Bob, so he should be the one to avert his eyes from you not your sweet and handsome man.

You’d fight god for Bob, he’s telling you not to but your mind is already made up. You must protect your sweet boy who runs extremely warm and is all powerful and invincible, yet you wanted to coddle him to your chest and kiss him senseless and you do. His sweet smile and soft eyes were enough to have you wanting to spend the day giving him as many kisses possible.

Forehead, cheek, nose, lips, eyelids, jaw, chin, neck, behind his ear, everywhere you will kiss this man as he stand awkwardly and giggles cutely. You smother him in affection but not too much to overwhelm him, just enough to have his cheeks flush and him holding onto your waist tightly as if he didn’t want to let go.

Loving Bob was warm, soft, sweet, gentle and kind as your first kiss was one to remember for certain, it’s gentle a little sloppy but it was worth the breathlessness you felt after pulling away from him, seeing his disheveled apparent and bewilderment within his eyes as though he didn’t expect himself to do such a thing, to take charge. You on the other hand wanted him to do it again a million times over for the rest of your shared life.

He treasures everything you give him, whether it’s plushies, they’re on his bed even if they take up half of it. He doesn’t like leaving any out, he holds them all to his chest when he sleeps with a massive smile upon his face, you could give him a bracelet you made and he’s never taking it off. It’s apart of him now forever and each time he touches it, he knows you’re with him wherever you were. He loves having a piece of you with him at all times, a reminder of who’s waiting for him or he’s waiting for every time you come back to the Watchtower from missions.

Bob is there waiting with wide open arms to hold you against him as he breaths you in, happy that you were okay.

Void

The opposite of Bob.

He’s knowing of what he wants and he’ll take it no matter what, he doesn’t care who stands in his way becuase who can take down a god like entirely like him? Absolutely no one.

You are his most precious possession and he’s a selfish dragon hoarding you away from everyone who could want you as much as he does.

Void doesn’t share and he’s not going to start now either, whoever looks at you longingly is now a shadow on a pavement somewhere. He doesn’t care about anything but keeping you all for himself, he’s selfish with you and would hoard all of your time and attention, so much so that you won’t noticed that Void has kept you away from everyone else for the entire day.

You couldn’t see him smile but you could feel that he was whenever you realised that you feel for his trap all the time.

He’s confident in his powers, he’s not concerned with anyone being more powerful than him when he was the pinochle of power itself in shadowy form. A form that can change appearance from time to time but he was perfectly content with his current one for the time being.

it was unassuming and yet still strikes that fear that something was wrong but not in the uncanny valley type of way, but close enough to understand his level of threat that was bubbling underneath.

He’s not afraid to show that you were his, not in the slightest. He’ll show off that you were his however he can with his possessive grabs and reminders that you can’t exactly escape him, for he’ll only follow you until you retuned to his arms like you should.

Got jealous of Bob and wanted whatever he had, he doesn’t like it when people have what he wants, what he desires and craves carnally. So why not just steal you away? It’s not like you minded at all, so what’s the problem?

Void is the one making the first moves, he does it in a way that tells you that this was your reality now, that he was what you should be thinking about constantly and without fail, that he should be the only thing that matters to you and no one else.

His kisses were demanding of attention, demanding you of your devotion and love and affection, things that were all his simply because you were his, his alone to love and be loved by as selfishly as he wanted.

Keeps a close eye on the people you have within your life, if he senses that they were trying to put distance between you and him, then he will rid them however he sees fit, for no one was allowed to come between you and Void at all.

His hold over you was airtight and it was near impossible to escape it as he could appear before you within a blink of an eye as his pinprick eyes stare deeply into your own, he knows where you are without having to try so hard either, he finds it humorous when you do try to escape his gaze, the hunt entertained him greatly as he followed you at a slower pace.

He makes you think you’re somewhat in control, only for the truth to come out as he reminds you that he lets you off with certain things because he loves you and only you. So you should treat him the same by dedicating yourself to him only and no one else, he didn’t care the relationship you had with others, they didn’t matter as much as your relationship with him.

Is into the whole predator/prey thing. Void obviously being the predator and you being the prey each and every time.

Knows your fears so intimately that it shouldn’t come as a surprise if you act out he’ll just trap you in your worst moments until you’ve learned your lesson, but this was a rare punishment because Void was under the belief that you could do no wrong and that it was everyone else trying to poison your mind against him.

There are moments where he acts like a gentleman towards you as he kisses the back of your hand, holding onto it tightly in a way that erased any chances of putting distance between the two of you, has his hands respectfully upon your waist but his grip was almost iron clad and kept you pressed to his chest in a manner that screamed ownership.

Void hordes you like a dragon with its gold, keeping you hidden from all, keeping you in his version of safety and protection, unable to let you go because he didn’t want to let you go and refused to do so. For you were his to have and to hold and to keep, no one else should be granted a glimpse of you at all.

[ofstarsandvibranium]

Fur-evermore

Fandom: Marvel

Pairing: Robert "Bob" Reynolds x F!Reader

Summary: Because you're Bucky's assistant, you, and your service dog, Juniper, head to the tower to give him some files as well as meet the rest of his new team...including a very cute and slightly awkward, Bob.

A/N: so reader has a service dog, but I didn't go into specifics as to why. also this is like 3k words so yeah. enjoy!

Juniper, or Juni, as you like to affectionally call her, walks by your side as you enter the resident floor of the Avengers Tower. Even though Bucky didn't need you as much as he did when he was a Congressman, your assistance made his life a little easier. You thought yourself to be like a hero for the hero.

"Who are you?" the young blonde woman, you learned to be Yelena, asks as you come into her view.

You stop and politely smile, "Oh, hi! I'm Y/N. Bucky's assistant. I have clearance to be here. I mean, obviously, since I wouldn't be here if I didn't have clearance."

The tall blonde man that you know to be John Walker, frowns, "Why does Bucky get an assistant and we don't?"

Bucky sighs and stands from his spot on the couch, "She was my assistant when I was in Congress and she's generous enough to continue working with me," he approaches you with a friendly smile, "What's up?"

"Well here," you hand him some files, "Are some files Val wanted you all to go through before your mission in two days. Also, Sam says you're not answering his calls or texts."

Bucky winces, "We got into an argument and I need my space. He needs to respect that." He bends down and lets Juni sniff his hand.

Juni looks up at you waiting for your permission. You giggle and say, "Go ahead, Juni."

With her release words, the golden retriever practically pounces on Bucky, causing him to fall onto his back. Bucky's laughing as Juniper smothers him in kisses.

Yelena looks at the sight, confused, "Didn't think he even knew how to laugh."

You snort, "Juni has her way of breaking down people's walls."

"Who's dog is that?" asks another blonde man that comes down the steps.

You look at him and raise your hand, "She's mine! Her name is Juniper, or Juni. My service dog." You pat your leg, "Jun Jun, come."

Juniper immediately leaves Bucky to sit at your feet, "So this is Juniper," you scratch behind her ear, "and I'm Y/N, Bucky's assistant." You look around the room and point out each member, "Yelena, John, Ava, Alexei," and you turn to the man who stands some distance from you, "And you're Bob, right?"

He shyly nods and smiles, "Yeah. That's me. Hi."

"Hi. You all will probably see me and Juni a lot. So don't be alarmed if you see me here at random times. Really all depends on what the old man here," you gesture to Bucky who sits up, "needs from me."

Bucky grunts as he gets to his feet, "I can fire you, you know?"

"But then your life would be in shambles. You need me, old man," you nod to the files in his hands, "Please don't forget to look through those."

He rolls his eyes, "I won't."

You look at each member of Bucky's team, "If you ever need to get a hold of Bucky and he's not answering, feel free to get in contact with me. I know how he likes to ignore his phone." You face him again, "Please talk to Sam."

You shoot a smile at Bob, "Have a good rest of your day, Bob!"

He watches as you and Juniper head to the elevator, "Yeah...you too," he murmurs, eyes stuck on you until the elevator doors close. He turns to Bucky, "She's really nice."

Bucky scoffs, "To you. She's a pain in the ass to me, but she gets the job done. Helps me stay organized. Juniper is a lot of help too when things become too stressful. Have you thought about getting one?"

"What?" Bob asks with a scrunch of his brows.

"A service dog or emotional support dog."

Bob shrugs, "Dunno. Never had a dog growing up. Don't even know if I really like them or if I can even take care of one."

"Well Y/N loves to educate people on service dogs. So if you ever have questions, you can ask her when she's around."

"Yeah. Sure, I'll-I'll do that." he glances back at the elevator before retreating to his recliner near the window.

__________________________

The next time Bob sees you is a day after the team has the mission. Because Bob has buried The Void inside him, he hasn't been much help. So he stays at the tower and does what he can to make everyone's lives a little easier.

This includes make food.

You exit the elevator and are immediately hit with the smell of food. You follow the scent to the kitchen to see Bob pulling out a whole roast out of the oven.

"Smells amazing!" he jolts in surprise and you giggle, "Sorry for scaring you."

He chuckles, "It's fine. Wasn't expecting to see anyone until later." He sets the roast on the counter to rest.

You sit at one of the high chairs, Juniper plotting down beside your feet, "You know how to cook?"

"Been learning since I can't do much else to help. Kind of became the resident cook and cleaner around here, but it's fine."

You nod, "I'm sure they're really grateful for you, Bob."

"Oh yeah, Yelena tells me all the time. Bucky and Ava too, sometimes. Alexei and John don't say it as much, but I can tell they are. But Yelena the most, especially when I experiment on cooking certain dishes. She gets to taste all of them," he smiles brightly and it makes you smile.

"You and Yelena seem very close."

"Oh yeah," he nods, fidgeting with the hem of his hoodie, "She's helped me a lot with my...issues."

"Have you seen a therapist?"

"Yeah. I have sessions with them every other day, but, you know, some days are harder than others."

You give a hum, "Yeah, I know that all too well. I'm lucky to have Juni here to help me on those bad days," you look fondly at your furry companion.

"Yeah...Bucky said I could talk to you about having a service animal?"

Your eyes brighten and you straighten up, "Yes! I'm always willing to educate people and answer questions."

Bob rounds the kitchen island and sits beside you, "I'm just not sure I'm a dog person or if I'm capable of taking care of one. I can barely take care of myself sometimes."

"It's a partnership. You and the animal work together and create a harmonious relationship. Juni helps keep me above water and I provide her the basic necessities and lots of love." At the sound of her name, Juniper sits up and gives Bob a curious sniff.

"You can pet her, if you'd like," you say gently, "When we're out in public is when I need her to be more focused, but I'm more lenient when we're with a few people."

Bob holds out his hand to let Juni sniff him. Her tail wags as she steps toward him. Her cold nose touches Bob's hand as she sniffs him.

She immediately jumps onto her hind legs and rests her head on his lap. You hum, "She senses an uneasiness in you she's trying to help ground you." You slide off your chair, "Here, lay on your back on the floor."

Bob silently follows your orders. He slides off the chair and moves to lay on the floor. His back his pressed against the cold tiles.

Juniper immediately lays a part of her body on top of Bob. The weight and the warmth of her on top of him was comforting. So comforting, he felt himself tearing up.

You softly smile at him, "It's okay to cry, if you need to."

He sniffles, "I'm sorry. I just-"

You shake your head, "You don't have to explain. I know. I'll just sit here with you until you're okay."

So that's how you two stay for a time. Juni on top of Bob, Bob crying and letting himself feel whatever he's feeling, and you, just providing a comfortable silence.

After some time passes and Bob's cries subside, you call Juniper to you. She crawls off Bob and sits beside you, watching as Bob sits up. He wipes at his eyes, "Thank you. I didn't-I don't even know how to-"

"You're welcome," you help each other to your feet, "Is it okay if I hug you?"

"Yeah," he replies and stands there as you wrap your arms around him. He hugs you back, relishing in your comforting warmth and scent.

"You're not alone, Bob," you murmur in his ear.

He chuckles, "Yeah...slowly starting to really get that."

______________________________

You make an effort to see Bob when you were at the tower, whether it was just a quick "Hello" or a little chat as he cooks. You made sure to see him.

You've come to find that Bob was a really sweet and kind person. He had a rough past and wanted to make up for that. That's something he shared with the other Avengers.

So whenever you were around, he also made an effort to offer up his assistance if you needed it. Whether it was to help carry some of your things or even give Juni some water. Bob was always there to help you out too.

Because of that, you two started to grow close. Now it wasn't just Bucky you spent a lot of your time with. It was either Bucky on some days, Bob on other days, or both at the same time.

Bucky didn't mind it though, he understood where Bob was coming from and wanted to help the kid wherever he could. But he couldn't help but tease you when it was just you and him.

"Are you here for me?" he asks with a teasing smirk as he approaches the elevator.

You snort, "Aren't I always?"

He shrugs, "Dunno, you might be here for a certain someone."

You know what he's insinuating, but you don't take the bait, "I mean, yeah, me and Yelena are cool I guess."

Bucky rolls his eyes at you, "Alright, smart ass."

You smirk at him in victory, "Anyway, I scheduled you to have a meeting with a PR rep."

Bucky's face scrunches in confusion, "Why?"

"Because you suck at answering questions. All of those press interviews you've done were painful. You, obviously, need help. But don't worry, everyone else will be there too because Val and her PR team can only do so much."

Bucky groans and crosses his arms over his chest, "When is this?"

You check your watch, "In three hours."

"What if I had plans?"

You scoff, "Please, Bucky, I make your plans. So I know you don't have any."

The brunette walks away grumbling about how much of a pain you are, but you know there isn't any malice behind it. You look down at Juniper, who stares up at you with a smile, her tail wagging.

You chuckle and pat her head, "Let's go see our friend, hm?"

You head up to the second residential floor where everyone's rooms are located. You go down the hall to the very last room where Bob resides. You knock while also pushing in the door, "Hey Robby-oh."

You enter to see Bob shirtless, Yelena hugging him.

The scene looked...intimate.

"Sorry, I-Juni!" Juniper bolts into the room and jumps onto Bob's bed. Usually, she's a lot more behaved, but it seems she's gotten super attached to Bob.

Bob chuckles and pets the golden retriever, "Hiya, Juni girl," he gives her a soft smile.

"Juni, here," you command and she immediately rushes to your side. You clear your throat, "Sorry for interrupting. Just wanted to say hi."

Yelena smiles, "It's fine. We weren't doing anything."

"I'll see ya later, Robby," you give him an awkward nod and Bob just gives you a shy wave.

You and Juni leave, closing the door behind you. You shake your head and murmur to yourself, "I'm so stupid."

______________________

When the door closes, Yelena breaks the silence, "Soooo that was awkward."

Bob looks at his friend with pleading eyes, "I just-you see why I'm not good enough? She's so beautiful and kind and smart and...I'm a mess. I'm broken-"

Yelena shakes her head, "Hey. No, we don't go there, remember? And broken things can be fixed...sometimes. You're working on yourself and that's good. If Y/N can't see that, then you shouldn't be with someone like her. But I do think she likes you too."

Bob looks at her with wide eyes, "You think?"

"I'm very perceptive. I saw her look sad when she saw us hugging. You know what that means?" Bob shakes his head and Yelena answers, "She thinks we're a thing, which means she's jealous. Which means, she has feelings for you." She does a mindblown gesture and it causes Bob to snort.

He lets out a deep breath and scratches his chest, "And if she doesn't like me back?"

Yelena shrugs, "I don't think that'll happen, but, if, somehow, she doesn't like you back, then you move on. That's the only thing you can do." She gives Bob a pat on the shoulder and heads out, leaving Bob to think about what she's said.

__________________

You avoid Bob for the next few days after walking in on him and Yelena. You hate to admit how much it hurt to see him with her like that. You thought you two were getting closer, and maybe he even liked you. But, of course, you didn't stand a chance against someone as cool and as beautiful as Yelena Belova.

You were a little sad and insecure, so you did your best to continue to do your job while also trying to avoid the tower as much as possible.

Bucky caught on though, noticed you weren't coming by. So, after Bob asked for you, he decided to ask for you to come by the tower. He tried to make it seem like it was urgent, so you and Juni came storming onto the residential floor looking distressed.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?" you ask as you approach a waiting Bucky.

"I'm fine, but I wanted to know if you're okay."

You shuffle your weight from one leg to another, "Yeah. Why?"

He shrugs, "Just noticed you haven't been around for the past few days...and Bob has been asking about you."

"He has my number."

"He wants to talk to you in person."

"Why?"

"I don't know, but, whatever happened, he wants to talk to you, Y/N. Take it from me, ignoring your issues won't make them go away."

You groan, "I don't-"

"Y/N?" you freeze when you see Bob on the stairs.

Juniper barks and you let her run to him. She jumps at him and he chuckles, "Hiya, girl."

You look at Bucky with pleading eyes, "Don't you-"

"I'll leave you to it," he gives you a wink and walks back upstairs, giving Juni a pat and Bob a nod.

You internally groan and slowly walk over to the base of the stairs where Bob sat, petting Juniper.

"Hi," you say shyly and he looks up at you, "Hi."

"So...you've been asking for me?"

"Well, you haven't been around. Wanted to see if you were okay."

"You could've just texted me."

"Yeah, well...I wanted to see you...to talk to you."

You sit beside him on the stairs, "I'm here so...what's up?" You avoid looking at him by petting Juni.

"I really don't know how else to say it and I'm not good at this stuff. But...I like you, Y/N. A lot. And, I know I've got my issues, but I promise I'm working on them. And I don't think I'd make the best partner or boyfriend or whatever, but I'm willing to try things out. With you," he clarifies at the end.

You're looking at him, eyes searching for any hint that he's lying or playing some prank on you.

You finally find the words to speak, "I thought you and Yelena-"

"We're just friends. That day you came into my room to see me, I was having a bit of a breakdown. She was helping talk me through it."

"I like you too," you say softly, "When I saw you with Yelena, I thought...yeah. So I did the cowardly thing and avoided coming here because I didn't want to potentially see you and her together."

Bob reaches for your hand, lacing his fingers with yours, "I get it. It's okay. Feelings are...scary."

You chuckle, "So scary."

"So? Do you think we can try this out? I can't guarantee I won't mess things up-"

"It's okay," you whisper, cupping his face with your free hand, "I wanna try things out with you, Robby. As long as we both stay on top of communicating how we're feeling and what's going on in our heads, I think we'll be okay."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," you reply in a whisper, leaning in closer and closer that yours-

"AH! Young love!" Alexei exclaims as he and Yelena exit the elevator, "So beautiful and lovey! Congrats you two!"

"Dad, shut up!" Yelena scolds her father, "Sorry! Carry on!" She pushes her father back into the elevator to bring him somewhere else.

Bob chuckles, "Well that was-"

His words are interrupted as you grab his face and kiss him. He's taken by surprise, but kisses you back. It's a little awkward, but also endearing.

He doesn't know what to do with his hands until he just settles with holding your face instead.

You pull away with a smile and take in the hazy look that Bob's has in his eyes.

"Woah," he says and you laugh, and it's one of the most beautiful things he's ever heard.

You scoot away to give him some room to breathe, "So, um, do you wanna go on a walk around the city with me and Juni?"

"Yeah. Absolutely." He stands up first, helping you to your feet. You hand him Juni's leash and she sits at his feet while he attaches it to her collar.

He holds out his hand to you and you take it, both of you walking out of there with a buzzing sensation around you two.

[whispersleo]

The joyous wyvern - the free book

You can find it in this drive folder!

Hello! Today I’m very excited to finally share this final project in my editorial design specialization: a children’s storybook album, inspired by the dialogue in The Wake written by Mary Kirby, where Illario talks about the time he went with Lucanis to hunt wyverns as children. I must mention that I took the liberty of introducing my own headcanon about their ages, with Illario being the oldest, because Lucanis strikes me as having a very clear "younger brother" behavior.

For this project, I’ve poured blood, sweat, and tears into it. I ended up doing absolutely everything myself when my classmate, who was supposed to help me with the layout for her part of the team project, just decided not to, but I feel content enough with the result to share it. Originally in Spanish, I translated and edited it into English so more people can enjoy it!

There’s a lot I’d like to say, I’ll be posting some sketches, the development process, the designs, and my usual notes [here], and I can answer any questions you might have about the project in the editorial area (or anything else about the project really), but for this post in particular, I just want to give you full, free access to this illustrated book and thank you because this has been on my mind and occupying my time for the last six months.

First, thank you to everyone in this amazing fandom who has supported my creative projects, whether by leaving kudos on AO3, liking my posts here on Tumblr, leaving comments, sending messages, or any form of support! You motivate me to create every day, make me feel welcome, and it’s so nice to be here.

Thanks to @woundedsoul12 for being the first person to welcome me to the fandom, read my works, and be vocal with me about it! In the beginning, I was so afraid of writing again, of making mistakes in some way, and I was very shy about showing what I was doing, but thanks to you, I’ve been able to gain confidence. Without your support, I don’t think I would have decided to keep creating for this fandom. You’ve allowed people to get to know me and have been incredibly kind about me and my work. I owe you so many thanks, I hope you never change, you’re an amazing person!

Thanks to @theheartmold for getting me interested in Illario as a character. Without your posts sharing your interest in the character, your analysis, and your overall enthusiasm, I honestly wouldn’t have been interested in reading Tevinter Nights or The Wake. After two playthroughs in the game, you made me decide to sit down and see that Illario had MUCH more to offer than his tragic portrayal in Veilguard. Maybe I don’t interact much with you, but I definitely wanted to let you know that without your posts, this illustrated story and in general, my content about Illario Dellamorte wouldn’t exist. You introduced me to my new favorite character, thank you so much!

And again, thanks to EVERYONE who has ever interacted with my work and with me as a person! Who has liked my art, fanfics, whatever! I hope you can now enjoy having this book that I give you with so much, so much happiness and love!

[vechter]

i love talking about the fistfight in outsiders #16 but the aftermath of it in #17 is equally delicious:

something about how dick and roy are standing noticeably further apart from the rest of the team (and yes, it's mostly because they just finished beating the shit out of each other) but it's the focus on dick's eyes glittering... how we know roy was bloodied and hurt too but winick focuses so extensively on dick and the blood on his face.

like... here's his wound, here's how he's bleeding, here's how he's managed to force roy to cut himself on all of dick's edges... and still... the injury is all dick's. he's managed to push away the one person who has irrevocably supported him, built him a life raft so he doesn't drown in his grief and he did it intentionally. he knew exactly what to say to get roy to throw the first punch.

and then we get this interaction with kory & roy on the rooftop... starting off with roy looking up at the sky with a very conscious decision to not show us the stars or the sky. i can't help but think this is a reference to roy & lian's conversation in secret files '03:

because throughout the fight in #16, dick and roy throw punches and words carelessly, while also cognizant of exactly what to say to make it hurt... but neither of them say donna's name. neither of them give voice to the spectre that haunts the entirety of this arc in outsiders. they can't... it's all just so unbearable.

so for winick to bring kory into this role— another person who loved donna just as much but who's also been called in solely to get a handle on dick & roy— and for her to say that the team is concerned about roy as he's brooding on a rooftop all feels so intentional. once upon a time, donna would've been the one to check up on roy but she's the reason why roy is so hurt... she's gone and nothing will make it okay... not even cutting himself on dick's edges. so here he stands, so obviously defensive, unable to look at kory, unable to handle her concern, all while the foreground is gritty and dark. no stars, no sky

and then you have this heartbreaking panel... roy literally and metaphorically avoiding kory's concern, the team's concern... both physically and emotionally grappling away from the dick of it all. sure, he tells her that dick will give his all— because having faith in dick grayson is such an innate part of being roy harper that there's really no other way to answer kory.

but that added jibe of "particularly to prove you all wrong" is such a wonderful insight into how fucked up he is right now. he has faith in dick's abilities but he doesn't have that same faith in dick's intentions with him. at this point, roy has tried everything— giving space, not giving space, setting up a whole team & HQ, providing dick with an outlet for his grief, trying to talk to dick, trying not to... and yet. dick brought up the worst moments of his life casually... like a weapon that was always in his arsenal:

and so roy walks away from it. but then we have the punchline— dick hidden in the shadows, eavesdropping on it all:

which is such a direct parallel to the panels in secret files that there's really no doubt in my mind that winick is asking us to think about all of this in conjunction:

the two instances are markedly different too. in secret files, dick's hidden in the shadows, yes, but we see him visibly crying whereas in #17, we see him shadowed entirely... only the white of his domino visible. because while dick blames himself for donna's death, what he did and said to roy in #17 is different in terms of his self-blame because he did the latter intentionally. he knew exactly what to say to get roy to hit him, and he hit back... almost like he wanted to hit first. he didn't walk away from any of it till kory and jade pulled them apart.

can you imagine how deep his self-loathing must be at this point? first, he gets ousted as leader by his own team... remember, this is a guy notoriously hyperaware of criticism from others because for dick, it's fulfilment of his own self-criticism and failures. and then he flung poison at roy with both his face and fists... a guy who has only been trying to help him, a guy who's grieving for donna just like him... his teammate, his childhood friend. and he was ready to burn it all down. nothing will be bearable again so what does it matter if he burns another bridge?

and the most heartbreaking part is... there's no resolution. dick doesn't apologize, roy doesn't ask him to.

the panels directly after pick up three weeks later where they're noticeably separated... working on separate tasks and sub-teams:

it's so deeply important to me for people to realize how high dick's self-loathing and self-hatred are at this point in canon... how much that level of vitriol directed towards himself (and others) hurts roy... a guy who has been through that kind of hatred directed inwards where it just cuts and cuts and cuts... and how dick chose to weaponize roy's lowest moment yet again (like new titans #101). and still, roy won't stop reaching out... he doesn't know how not to. donna would kill them both if she could see them now.

dickroy in this era are just "tell me what to do so you'll stop hurting me" over and over and over except it's moot because they both know the answer... and she's been dead for months.

[baphometsss]

I think you've missed a few things here.

But he ultimately says the vow he made earlier to Mythal outweighs what happened in Inquisition.

He doesn't say this. What he says is that the guilt over his failure of his former master and oldest friend (which led to her death) is too overwhelming for him to consider backing down, even though he desperately wants to. It's driven home repeatedly that he loves his friends in the Inquisition enough to almost abandon his plans, he has an entire room, the brightest room in the Lighthouse, dedicated to his memories of his time in the Inquisition. It is just his sense of duty and guilt gets in the way of him fully doing this, fully allowing himself to be happy, because he doesn't believe he deserves it. Yet he leaves clue after clue anyway, because he can't help himself. He repeatedly involves himself in Inquisition business, like the Dragon's Breath plot and the events of the Teahouse in The Dread Wolf Take You. (In fact he explicitly says that he got personally involved there bc the Inquisition was involved.) In the memory of his murder of Mythal, she even points out that it is his grief over her death and the effect of the Veil on the elven people that motivates him, not just the imprisonment of the Evanuris or his revenge. In other words, even Mythal's words are not enough for him to stop. He driven by guilt, a guilt that is so overwhelming that it transcends the object of the guilt (Mythal and the elven people); that is his ultimate motivation. Remember that the ancient elves were highly emotional beings; they didn't just feel emotions, they embodied emotions.

Re: his description of Mythal, he is doing what a lot of grieving people do where they know the person was bad but they loved them anyway--much like how abused children still love their parents despite the abuse. If the abuser dies, it can make things even more complicated and difficult to reconcile with. The truth is that Mythal contained multitudes because she was a person, not just a spirit anymore, and because, up until DAI at least, Solas only bonds like a spirit (i.e., more simply). It is difficult for him to reconcile all those complexities with the much simpler environment their friendship formed in, an environment where she was simply 'Benevolence' (or Justice depending on which Dragon Age we're talking about lol). That's why they refer to each other as 'old friends', because they became friends as spirits, when things were a lot simpler--before they were elves.

As for Mythal being the only thing that makes him stop--this also isn't true. If you were paying attention to the memory of the post-credits scene from DAI, you will know that Mythal already asked him to stop, and he would not, and she knew he would not. Because she alone wasn't enough. He was already too far gone, he had already almost destroyed the world with the Breach and he had already killed and betrayed his friends and/or lover. That is why she helps the Inquisition through Morrigan, because she knows that it is only with her support AND the support of his friends and/or lover that he will be able to let go of his plans. Neither one of them alone was enough, which is why they are working together--something that lies in direct contrast to Solas's insistence on working alone and refusing all help, even from those who love him, like Varric, Felassan, the Inquisitor, and even Mythal.

If you read Mythal as being the only thing that can get Solas to stop, it renders all the events of the previous two games pointless. The Inquisition changes him so radically that he almost considers stopping altogether. He leaves countless clues for the Inquisition to follow him when he says he doesn't want to be stopped, that he's on the di'nan'shiral or whatever. He only doesn't because of guilt and the magnitude of what his actions have done to the world, a magnitude that he himself says is far greater than the needs and desires of a single man. The world is more important to him than his own happiness and this is where that guilt comes from, because he failed it so badly.

The problem with this game is that it oversimplifies things to an embarrassing extent, to the point that most players said they felt incredibly patronised by it. We know that Solas's motivations are complex, and not just motivated by Mythal or how he failed her, yet the game beats us over the head with Mythal to the point that all his other, more complex and interesting motivations, fall by the wayside. Mythal also didn't deserve to be reduced to something so flat and uninteresting. That magnitude of failure and destruction that he has been so preoccupied with since he first woke up from uthenera is almost entirely ignored by the narrative.

I told my friend about how much that difference broke my heart, because it truly shows that Solas will change EVERYTHING about himself to do whatever he thinks is best/required of him. He isn’t innocent, no, not even close. At his core though, he is still there. He is still wanting to have better, do better, be better.

He does this because he is a manifested spirit, and spirits exist to reflect. The endings are all reflections of how the player chose to treat him. He only calls himself a God if you treat him with contempt and hatred; he reflects that contempt back. If you treat him with empathy and understanding (as 72% of players did), he will respond by doing what he always wanted to do, which was to leave the world behind and build a new future as Wisdom once more, potentially with his true love at his side.

The whole 'refuge for Mythal' thing is really interesting bc it shows that Solas really saw Mythal as being on his side when it couldn't be more obvious that she enjoyed the power of being queen of the Evanuris. He calls it a 'struggle' in the regret memory, but I don't think she was struggling as much as he thinks. Even Felassan realises how delusional he is about her. It's one of many things Solas is in denial about.

That said, it does seem like he was much more aware of Elgar'nan's evil than she was; I truly believe that Mythal found a kindred spirit in Elgar'nan and thought that she was the right one for him. She tempered him and mitigated the harm he did as much as she could (which doesnt seem to be that much, in all honesty). Whether or not they had romantic feelings for each other is up for debate, but I think it's very possible. There was likely an element of tension at being evenly matched in the way they were that gave their relationship a pathological edge. It was only when Solas told her about the Evanuris using the power of the Blight that she finally decided to take him seriously and challenge her husband and the rest of the Evanuris head-on.

It's also really revealing that the Blight was her final straw. Mythal obviously had no issue with slavery as long as her slaves were treated well. It's very reminiscent of real world attitudes some had towards their slaves ie that as long as you don't abuse them it's okay. They don't understand the fundamentally unethical nature of owning another person. It's why I don't buy the benevolence retcon because slavery is inherently cruel--something that both Solas and an elven Inquisitor can argue with Dorian about.

Yeah, Solas really is an unreliable narrator with Mythal and I really wish we'd had more perspectives other than his. I long to see Mythal in all her cunty glory but alas it will never be

[hsangel64]

meeting the family

pairings: neighbor!ellie williams x fem!reader

synopsis: its been a few weeks since ellie asked you to be her girlfriend and now its time to meet her family

warnings: use of y/n, mild cussing, mainly fluff!!

a/n: really short thats all enjoy!

pt. 2 — pt.4

“dont be nervous! joel can be scary but he’s like a giant teddy bear. just has that hard exterior cause he’s old..” she waved her hand around and went back to sifting through her clothes.

“i know i just get nervous with this stuff, my ex’s family HATED me! of course i’m going to be nervous.”

“i promise they will love you.” she came over to you and put her hands on your shoulders reassuring you, landing a small peck on your cheek and going back to finding herself an outfit. you groaned and fell back into the bed trying to reassure your own feelings. if ellie says it’ll be okay…it’ll be okay. you got up and got your things ready as ellie finished getting ready. ellie emerged from the bedroom smelling like her famous pine cologne.

“ready to go?” you nodded and you both made your ways outside to ellie’s car. the drive over was silent with the radio on a low volume and the sound of the car. you were nervous, like a lot. just thinking about the worst outcomes wasn’t helping your case.

“are you okay baby?” grabbing your attention you turned to her and nodded.

“yeah im okay.” she placed her hands on your on your thigh rubbing her thumb.

“i promise you it’ll be okay, ill be there to help.” you gave her a small smile and took a deep breath.

you guys got there quickly, pulling into the drive way you took yet another deep breath and got out of the car. following ellie close behind carrying the small tupperware of the cookies you made.

“babe its going to be fine. if you feel too overwhelmed just let me know okay.” you gulped and nodded thanking her. ellie knocked on the door and a woman opened it.

“hey honey! joel ellie’s here!” she pulled ellie into a hug and you just watched from behind.

“hey tess.” she giggled at the sudden hug.

“you must be y/n!” you held your hand out but tess pushed your hand away and pulled you in for a hug.

“no need to be formal were all family here!” you smiled at her and followed behind ellie inside, you saw two men standing in the kitchen and another woman sitting at the dining table.

“hey kiddo! how goes it?” she went around and hugged everyone and said hello.

“its been great…oh this is y/n.” she introduced you and you held out your hand, he shook it and nodded at you.

“i’ve heard a lot about you, been wondering if ellie was gon’ find someone to deal with her.” she hit him and you giggled at his remark.

“she doesn’t deal with me!”

“okay okay.” he put his hands up in defense and looked over at you and winked, you giggled quietly at his action. maybe this wasn’t going to be so bad.

———————————————————————————

you all were sat at the patio table outside enjoying a delicious dinner that tess and joel made. the string lights and the sunset being the source of light with the smell of food and laughter from everyone around the table. your nerves eased down and you got more comfortable. ellie had her hand on your thigh as you guys talked about funny moments during ellie’s childhood.

“you really were an ankle biter huh.” ellie pushed your shoulder as you all laughed at the story joel told. everyone was done eating so joel grabbed everyone’s plates.

“hey y/n why dont you help me with these dishes, i’ve gotta show you somethin’.” your heart dropped, what was he going to show you….oh god. you got up and grabbed some plates looking at ellie for some support. she tapped your butt and whispered that it would be okay. you followed behind joel as you both made your ways into the kitchen.

“i don’t want you to think i pulled you in here to tell you i don’t like you or somethin’ like that.” you nodded to him and he continued. “ellie’s been through so much, last time she had a girlfriend it ended horribly and she was here sulkin’ on my couch for months. all im sayin’ is i trust you and i like you a lot already. i just hope you don’t go and break her heart too.”

“no i promise i would never mr miller-“

“please call me joel, mr makes me feel old.”

“okay- sorry…but i promise i like ellie a lot and i would never go out of my way to ruin the one thing that has made me happy in a long time.” he nodded and did the unexpected…he pulled you in for a hug. pulling you against his chest with his hand holding your head against him, you slowly placed your arms around him and sat there for a little.

“woah were buddy buddy already??” you both pulled away to see ellie standing in the arch way of the kitchen, eyes wide open.

“was just givin’ her a talk that’s all.”

“oh jeez joel don’t tell me you scared her away..”

“i think you need to worry about that with yourself.” she gasped loudly and pushed him.

“you ass!” you laughed watching them mess around, you were thinking about what joel had told you and it made you smile. he wasn’t so bad after all.

———————————————————————————

taglist: @elliespotion

a/n: the shortest thing i think i’ve ever written but i’ve been busy and couldn’t think of what else to do for this… i will have longer chapters though!

[ldydeath]

I Need Somebody 2 | Kwon Ji-yong (G-Dragon)

Summary: Everything has changed now that you’ve appeared in Jiyong’s song. Do you have what it takes to make it out of the industry? Word count: 1.8k Warnings: slight angst (?), mentions of body weight and body image issues. Author’s Note: decided to then one of my April fics into a series. You can check out the master list here! 

You hadn’t known when you’d slipped into Jiyong’s car that night how much your life was going to change. You’d thought you’d just be a simple cameo on a song, maybe dip your toes into a new relationship. You never imagined you’d be standing around a group of people who were picking apart every last thing about you. 

Like everything Jiyong touched, the song had been a hit. You’d gotten more traction that you’d expected. Though, you figured that had to do with your last minute addition to the song being so heavily highlighted in Good Day more so than your actual vocals. Either way, you’d somehow managed to get signed to Jiyong’s label. 

He was helping produce your solo single, something you’d been very vocal about. You had never wanted fame, singing karaoke as a release had been enough for you. So if you were going to do this you were going to do it with someone you trusted. 

The two of you had been inseparable since the night you met. If you weren’t at his place he was at yours. You’d stood by his side for his first solo concert, gone with him to support Daesung's solo journey as well. You’d found a home with Jiyong in the few short months you’d known him.  That home was something you desperately wanted to get to right now. You didn’t know if you could handle one more person critiquing your body today.

Your phone buzzed, cutting through the noise and you let out a sigh as you excused yourself to see who it was. You weren’t at all surprised to see Jiyong’s name flash across the screen. You were supposed to have been done with this outfit fitting hours ago. He had a show at a golf event that you were supposed to be at. He’d be taking the stage any minute. 

Did you forget about me?

You snorted at the text, as if you could forget him even if you tried. 

Not even a little bit. Fitting went over. Should be out of here soon.

I’ll make sure to send you a video. I’m wearing the suit you picked out. Miss you.

Don’t change, I’ll be over after. 

You smiled at your phone, before you heard it. The soft murmurs of the team. Someone was asking what Jiyong possibly saw in you, another commenting on your body weight….again. You tried to silence the noise, because that’s all it was. You were a pretty girl, someone Jiyong had been attracted to and it didn’t matter what they thought. At least that’s what you told yourself. 

The fitting went on for a few more hours and you finally made your way to your house, defeated. You were supposed to be celebrating at Jiyong’s. A successful show for him, a successful fitting for you. Future power couple in the making and all that. But after this day, you just needed to curl up in a ball and shut the rest of the world out. 

You’d sent Jiyong a text telling him you weren’t feeling up to going to his place and headed straight home. You’d been too far in your own head, you'd missed Jiyong’s car parked out front. Didn’t even realize the door was unlocked when you stuck your key in. You slid out of your shoes and dropped your bag down, a sniffle following suit as you leaned against the door. Your eyes cloudy with tears.

“What happened?” Jiyong’s voice had an edge to it you hadn’t heard before and you turned to face him. 

“I didn’t know you were here, I’m sorry.” You wiped the tears away quickly as more seeped out. You hadn’t meant to let them get to you like this. 

Jiyong had known something was up when you didn’t make it to the show. His suspicions had been right when you’d canceled on him all together. If anyone knew how cruel the industry could be, it was him. He’d watched it destroy his best friend, almost destroyed him too. He wasn’t going to let that happen to you. 

He moved quickly, his hands finding their way to your face as his thumb wiped away the tears spilling down your cheeks. It broke his heart seeing you this way and he pulled you to him. Your face buried into his chest as you took a minute to collect yourself. He rested his chin on your head, holding you close as his hands ran soothing circles on your back. He didn’t know what they’d done to you, but he’d make sure they wouldn’t do it again. 

“What did they do?” His voice was more calm, but there was still an edge to it. 

“ApparentlyI’m hideous and extremely wrong for you.” You sighed, moving out from the safety of his arms. 

“That’s completely inaccurate.” He crossed the room, keeping in pace with you. “You’re gorgeous for starters. And you could do a lot better than me.” You snorted. 

You moved to sit on the couch, pulling a blanket up over you and wrapped your arms around your legs, attempting to make yourself as small as possible. You took a second to take in Jiyong, his messy hair, the suit, under different circumstances you’d be ripping those clothes off him. You wanted the confidence you’d had that morning back. 

“You look nice, by the way.” Jiyong smirked at your words before moving to sit next to you. 

He pulled you into his arms and you practically melted into his touch. This was what you’d wanted all day - to be with him. You just hated that you felt so broken in his arms. As if reading your thoughts, Jiyong placed a kiss to the top of your head, your cheek, and then finally your lips. 

There it was, that magnetic pull you’d felt in the club again. It was always there, pulling you to him. The struggles of the day disappearing for a minute while you’re tongues danced for dominance. If you could spend the rest of time kissing this man you’d be happy forever. Unfortunately, you couldn’t. 

“I ordered us food. Figured you hadn’t eaten today.” His forehead resting against yours as he spoke. 

“I haven’t. I should eat salads until I fit into this ridiculous outfit.” You pulled away, as if repulsed with yourself. 

“Hey. No. You’re perfect. Everyone in that club the night we met thought so, I still think so. We’ll get you a new stylist if this continues. They need to alter the clothes to fit you, not the other way around.” He pulled you back to him. “You’re going to eat and we’re going to forget this day ever happened.” 

Your head found its way to his shoulder, and you curled into him. His arm stayed planted around you, as if he was solely responsible for keeping you upright. You don’t know how long you sat there in the silence but it was nice to have him to come back to after a day like this. 

The two of you are in silence, Jiyong watching to make sure you actually ate. He knew how easy it was to get lost in the noise of the negative comments, but he would reassure you every day that they were wrong if they had to. 

“Come on, up.” Jiyong was on his feet his hand reaching out for you. 

“What, why?”

“Just trust me.” You sighed, taking his hand.

He pulled you to your feet before taking out his phone and flipping through his Spotify before landing on the perfect song. Hitting play, his hand rested on your hip, his other gripping your hand. You let out a small laugh as you swayed to the music. 

“This is cheesy.” You teased, your eyes glancing up to look at him. 

“It’s romantic.” He corrected, a lopsided grin crossing his face as his eyes locked with yours. 

You let him twirl you around your living room, his voice humming along to the lyrics of the song. It wasn’t one you recognized but he had a way of making everything so beautiful. This song was sure to be your new favorite. 

You could feel yourself relaxing, the weight of the day finally fading away as you melted into Jiyong. A real smile on your face as you leaned up to kiss him. He held you close, his lips moving with yours as he tried his best to kiss all your pain away. 

“You should be my Too Bad dancer on tour.” He said it so casually, like he had the power to just change everything that easily. 

“What? Why?” You shook your head. “I couldn’t.”

“You should see yourself when you get lost in the music like that. You’re breathtaking.” He moved your head so that you were looking at him. “And you can. Unless you’re scared.” 

“I’m not.” You glared at him, knowing exactly what he was doing. He’d figured you out so quickly in the short time you’d been together. “Are you sure?”

“About you? Always.” He smirked and you grinned. 

“Alright. I’ll do it.” 

Jiyong’s gummy grin matched the one on your face and he leaned down to kiss you again. This was the only way he could think to keep you safe. You’d be on the road with him, you could work together on songs while you traveled around Asia. He could fire your stylist and you could use his. You’d be surrounded by support and if it ever got too heavy he’d be right there fo carry the weight of the world for you. Or with you. Whatever you wanted. 

He’d known it the second he’d laid eyes on you that he’d do anything for you. Now he just needed to show you how serious he was about it. This journey wasn’t going to be easy, but it would lead you to some beautiful places and a chance at a different life than the one you’d grown accustomed to. You were a star in his eyes and soon enough the rest of the world would see that too. 

“Come on, let’s go to bed. It’s been a long day.” His hand slid down your body effortlessly as he reached for yours.

Lacing your fingers together, he led you to your room. It amazed you how comfortable he was walking through your house like he owned the place. You hadn’t been together that long but you couldn’t imagine a time before him now. 

He helped you undress, leaving tinder kisses across your skin as he slid your robe on your body. You helped him out of his suit jacket, undid his tie carefully before flinging it across the room. You’d imagined this going so differently when you’d seen this suit earlier. He stripped down to his boxers before climbing into bed and pulling you to him. 

He covered you both up, his arms wrapping around you as you drifted off to sleep. He watched you for a while before reaching for his phone. He fired off a few text messages to make sure you wouldn’t have to worry about ever seeing that team of people ever again. When you woke up in the morning you’d have a whole new team, he’d make sure of that. 

tag list: @wcnderlnds @infinetlyforgotten @berfgrimm @aizshallnotbefound @loveesiren @gdinthehouseee @tulentiy @petersasteria @alosss-blog @sooyasya @dprvivi @mirahyun @breakmeoff @1950schick @flymetothexmoon @sherrayyyyy

[edenfenixblogs]

Please read what I’m about to write with an open heart and not as an attack I am not yelling at you:

The pope has always had an impact on the Jewish community. Always. It’s not a place where my nose doesn’t belong. I didn’t say he has to behave a certain way. I merely expressed an interest in how it would impact my community. As it always does. Pope John Paul II was an amazing pope and I recall feeling very safe in Catholic spaces during his reign (is reign the right word? I’m unsure of nomenclature actually. Not trying to be offensive. I just don’t actually know). The pope who came after him was concerning. And I noticed a major uptick in Catholics who accused me personally of killing Jesus. Like it or not, who the pope is and his relationship with and understanding of Jewish people does have an impact on us, because he genuinely represents so much to so many people.

The most recent pope was a good man with an open heart who didn’t affect the jewish community too much until the last couple years, where he made some unfortunate missteps but also did some very kind things.

I’m please know that while I am Jewish, my sister and best friend are Catholic. We discuss stuff like this all the time.

I intentionally did NOT tag my original post because I didn’t want it coming up in tags about this. I shared a post with my followers only. I can’t help how it gets reblogged or shared. My blog focuses on antisemitism in the current climate. And the Pope is definitely NOT the biggest factor in antisemitism right now, but he has to potential to affect things a bit, and that is relevant to me personally.

Also, my post was cheeky in nature because I’m a big English History buff and I genuinely think it’s quite funny (and kind of cool and also very distressing at the same time) that I, a Jewish American Woman, have a pope from my country while also having a leader of my country who is wildly unpredictable and has a pretty high likelihood of challenging the progressive, immigration-positive pope ideologically. This is a situation with a lot of historic president and in times where the church and kings/national leaders had more power and influence, could be quite dangerous. Now, in the modern era, I’m genuinely intrigued how things could play out. I genuinely never expected to experience a pope from my country, for a lot of reasons. And I care about it who he is not just because I care about Jews, but because he’s an influential global figure.

Ultimately, there are more than 1 billion Catholics in the world. There are under 16 million Jews in the world. The influence of one man at the head of a group of 1 billion people WILL affect Jews. We aren’t out of line to care about that. Whether the Pope believes Jews killed Jesus or was an ally during WWII or if he was in Hitler Youth all are things that have happened in the past and all are things that have affected how people treat me, personally. Also please note that my original post did not mention Israel or Jews. And in my reblog of the tags on my post, I simply mentioned antisemitism, not Israel. If that is political to you, I genuinely hope you interrogate why.

You’re right that the pope isn’t a political figure. But he’s a religious figure. And he’s a prominent one. And I genuinely think most Popes don’t just care about their impact on Catholics but also on how they impact the world in general. Catholic-Jewish relations have a complex history—sometimes terrible and sometimes wonderful. And reverberations of that relationship still impact all of us today, just as all history leaves traces on our current lives.

I love Catholics. I’ve even attended mass with friends in the past. The (non-Jewish) people most supportive of me in the past two years have been my Catholic friends and family, actually. @will-write-for-food, would you classify this as fair? Anything I should add or be aware of.

Fascinated to learn the impact of a pope from my country on the madman in charge of my country. Will this be an alliance of mad men seeking power or will I be in the unexpected position of rooting for the Papacy to impact the Christian majority in my country by pressuring the aforementioned population to distance themselves from the madman in question.

Stay tuned for: unexpectedly reliving middle age politics.

[imdoingjustgr8]

hey

soooo... how have any fellow td fans been coping recently

meme aside, i got """a bit""" of a vent coming below that no one's obligated to read. and if you do, forgive me if it ends up long asf and kind of all over the place. it was 5 in the morning when i began writing and i just want a place to get all my thoughts out or i won't be able to sleep in peace.

so, here it goes:

td suddenly being taken down out of nowhere and confirmed to be canceled, never to come back was a massive bummer and all, but honestly? i've been taking the news of the official td discord server's impending deletion much harder. don't get me wrong, i do feel really damn bad for outlaik, i just find him dropping td much easier to accept than seeing the first and only big dc community i've ever joined, that encouraged me to post so much sonexe art in the first place, hell, even have made a bit of a name for myself in (literally being known as "the sonexe guy") be sent to oblivion along with it.

to think that i initially only played a random goofy-looking sonic.exe roblox game out of sheer boredom, to think that i initially joined the discord to only make player reports and maybe lurk around. but when i discovered the creations channel, i've ended up checking that very channel almost religiously, posted alot of my own silly drawings, and met so many cool, funny people and amazing fellow artists that have inspired me to this day.

i've only been around for 2 (and a half?) years, so to see everything go down to shit so suddenly was really jarring. i tend to be a really sentimental guy, like "i hoard 1000+ pictures of a sand sculpture i just built in multiple angles" levels of sentimental, so the thought of all those fun interactions and discussions, creative takes and suggestions, and amazing art that i couldn't all save becoming inaccessable to look back on, to become completely wiped out soon has been pretty distressing to me. it doesn't help that most of the artists i've followed on there don't seem to have links or have posted on other platforms.

one of my biggest comforting hopes at the moment is that if anyone else from on there i've interacted with happens to see this and recognize me, artist or not, i'd be really happy to give you a follow! and to those who don't, if i might not see you again for awhile or ever, i wish you well and hope you know you're cool asf. like, i seriously feel very lucky and grateful of how nice and unexpectedly crazy-supportive everyone was, especially with my first ever sonexe post. i really mean it when i said you're all what encouraged me to post without fearing massive judgement and made me feel excited to share my silly doodles and ideas. seriously, thank you all.

also, i feel as if this is something that needs to be said, or atleast said more; i hope that people would learn to be more considerate of outlaik's pov on everything. i seriously doubt anyone would have the motivation to continue a project they wanted to move on from long ago in the first place. getting a copyright claim on his ass, having his acc and dev career at risk, still being constantly interrogated about td's return (bc of ppl making shit up) when he's already done all he could was just the final nail in the coffin for him with the game. i respect him wanting to just quickly move on and i do hope he finds successs, possibly pull even more than what he got from td with current and future projects he can fully enjoy. i'd also have to thank him and his game for bringing us all together in the first place.

ok big sappy rant over. idk how to end this gracefully i just rlly want to go to sleep atp lmao. i've been typing for 4 straight hours kill me rn

good mor-night 😪

[kiaramemes09]

Thinking about the friends and families of these dead students.

SPOILERS FOR THE ENTIRETY OF TETRO DANGANRONPA PINK BELOW

I sincerely apologize in advance.

Isono is never going to be able to repair her strained relationship with her sister. Her mother is running around, panicking for her youngest child. Her millions of fans, people she made smile, perhaps more people like Wada who were uplifted by her streams, they’re left to wonder where on earth she is. Is she okay? Is she taking a break? Is she quitting? Why without warning? Is she safe?

Sasaki’s parents cherish her. It’s unimaginable the guilt her parents must feel for failing to protect her horrific things she was going through thanks to her teacher, from having her innocence ruined. And now, she’s gone. Their only child, who they wanted nothing more than to be happy, is gone without a trace.

All the friends Chiba made along the way in her career, all wondering where that girl, the sweetest of young ladies went. Her TV family, her TV mom, TV dad, and TV big brothers, her cosmologist, she really wanted to see them again. Chances are, so do they.

Harada’s parents love him and are naturally searching for their child. His girlfriend, a girl he might’ve spent the rest of his life with, from their high school years to old age, was stated to might end up going with him. She can’t even remember him by the tiger cub he cared for.

Kamimura’s aunt had to of reported him missing a little while ago, when his rent went unpaid. Maybe she’s wondering if she failed him. Did she fail her sister’s beloved child, and is why he’s gone? He’s never going to see her again, or tell her how much he missed her when he was stuck in there.

Tsuno’s parents must be searching high and low, desperately trying to find their sweet baby. Knocking on doors, begging someone, anyone, to give them information. Her little brothers, nine year olds, probably can’t even begin to comprehend why their big sister isn’t home.

Okazaki’s former roommates have no idea that anything’s even wrong. She must’ve gone off on an adventure again. Maybe she’ll drive in with another stolen van. Maybe she won’t be calling herself Okazaki Hanano and they’ll be calling by yet another one of her aliases when she crashes on one of their couches.

Watari’s little siblings, they relied on her. She was forced to parent them, to take care of them. She held a more motherly role in their lives than their own mother, who’s probably scrambling now that her daughter isn’t thanklessly doing her job. That baby on the way, that baby will never know her. That baby will never be able to recall the wildfire girl that will be so dearly missed.

Hama’s mom and little sister, they were nothing short of close with him. They did need him. They needed their kind boy there with them. They pray day and night that their Ran will come home, that he’ll be back unhurt and God will comfort him through whatever is separating them right now. The old ladies in the neighborhood adored him, that kind, helpful young man. He should be home right now.

Hayashi’s parents will never. ever. give up on their daughter. Their crazy stubborn daughter will be found, whether it be in a few more days, weeks, a year, or several, she’ll return. Surely. They’ll find her, maybe more scarred than before, but they’ll be there for her, ready to hold her in their warm embrace. If there is even a chance what they find won’t be a body, they will hold onto it and believe that as the case regardless of the odds. She’s still out there. She has to be.

Hasegawa’s got a family at home, but it doesn’t matter anymore. Their family broke apart, but Hasegawa was in an at least civil relationship with them all. His mother loved and supported her son to bits. His sister, his best friend, must’ve started digging the moment he disappeared. His dad and dad’s girlfriend must be worried sick. They lost little Reina eleven years before, in a regrettable accident that should’ve been avoided. The Hasegawas can’t be losing another precious child, can they? They can’t. They just…can’t.

It’s not fair.

[lucca-stateofmind]

Bob headcanons

It's quite obvious that Bob is mentally unstable and requires a mental health 'traitement'

He first meets with a therapist twice a week and, during the first month, everyone was waiting for him in the waiting room so he wouldn't be too scared to go alone

He got diagnosed a few months later and has medication to help him control his mood swings and intrusive thoughts (nb : I headcanon him as bipolar but bpd is really close, we haven't seen much of it so a regular diagnosis isn't possible - bdp would explain the low self esteem even if any trauma does that tbh)

therapy really helps him get rid of what he doesn't want to tell the others yet, he will, eventually, confess some of it and they'll all bond to a movie or game

having his childhood wasted by his abusive father, he oftenly asks for 'childish' things (ava and him go to the park and use the swings for hours)

he's the sweetest guy ever!! like, seriously, he'll offer a hand even if he doesn't know shit about it

not very touchy but he slowly lets his guard down and has Yelena platonically resting her head on his shoulder (this is symbolic of her silently telling him he'll always have her back as much as she has him supporting her so really NOTHING romantic)

When having a panic attack, he usually refers to every members with a shorter version of their names : Yelena = Lena Bucky = Buck Ava = Va John = Jo Alexei = Al/Alex