#and i hope all of you are ok and log off if you need to if it’s too upsetting
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stillgotme · 11 months ago
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stay safe this holiday weekend, friends 💖
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tkbrokkoli · 2 years ago
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a colleague of mine used to be a professional athlete in the 80s and today she showed me and another colleague photographs from back then and she casually mentioned that two of her team mates outed themselves as trans men and two as lesbians later in life and i was like !!!!!! im
#not fandom related#personal log stardate#i want to write more but im not sure what im feeling and how to express it#she used the phrase 'man in a woman's body' to mean they are trans man which i found v good actually#bc she seemed to fully except and support them. these guys and dykes should be in their late 50s now i think? idk any older queer ppl#so having an older colleague casually mention that felt v good#also they all were from a small town i think#just like me!!! i know several of my high school friends are also queer. like. me and at least 2 others#but we all outed ourselves way later. years after high school#oh fuck i just realized i completely misspelled 'accept'. i've had a long week ugh#anyway tomorrow i gotta make a horrible phone call w my broken phone and i already hate it and i'm dreading it#abt my phone. it doesn't charge anymore so i have it turned off at all times so i can make phone calls when the urgent need arises#and tomorrow i have to call electrician. not bc i want to but bc i was ordered to and i absolutely fucking hate it#*an electrician. or a janitor. idk yet#the other person who could call instead of me is just straight up rejecting to do it but it rly urgently needs to be Done#so im gonna have to step up as the mature person now and i tell myself 'it needs to be done end of discussion'#but i hate that i am always always always the person who has to take care of uncomfortable things like making phone calls and shit#like. i get it. it's necessary. there will always be phone calls i have to make. it's just. why me??? i fucking hate this shit!!! AAAAAAAHHH#anyway i should go to bed. i haven't checked my notifs yet it's been a rly exhausting week. hope you guys are ok thi#*tho
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nanamiscocksleeve · 2 months ago
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Prescription For Pleasure
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Warnings: MDNI, sex, masturbation, medical masturbation, use of vibrators, clit play, piv sex, use of latex gloves, oral (fem receiving), some praise, kinda slow burn A/n: I am not normal about this man in any way. Not really proofread. Please do not use my banners without permission.
You’re seated in Zayne’s office, trying not to squirm as he sets up your appointment. Although this was now the third time you were seeing him for this regular inspection, it didn’t alleviate your nerves the slightest. Each month, according to the Hunter’s Association regulations, every hunter needed to be seen by their primary care physician for 3 consecutive days for their health.
And although the association deemed it a necessity, it was an embarrassing requirement according to you. The Hunter’s Association had done a survey and discovered that many of their employees suffered from high levels of stress because they were isolated and lacked much-needed human contact. To combat this, they made it mandatory to get physical contact by a medical professional every month.
But when all the fancy jargon was pushed aside, all the hunters called it the same thing - medical masturbation. It had become wildly popular amongst both men and women hunters, eagerly marking the days on their calendar for when they could come in. When you heard about the rule, you wished the earth would open up and swallow you whole. You had tried talking to Jenna to insist that you were indeed taking care of yourself in that aspect, thanks to your trusted vibrator, but she had shaken her head no. 
“We need documentation. I’m subject to it, and so is everyone else in my order.”  Defeated, you’d walked out of Jenna’s office before remembering another mortifying fact with a jolt. Your primary care physician was Zayne. 
Your childhood friend, your trusted cardiologist, stoic and calm, who remained reserved during your general checkups, was going to be your medical masturbator. You had almost turned yourself into a ball on the floor, tweaked out at the insanity of it all. Although Zayne was your general physician, you had a separate gynecologist, and apart from asking if you’d had your annual PAP smear, Zayne had left that part of your anatomy unquestioned. It didn’t help that you were attracted to him, and sure, if he’d asked you out on a date, you would have been more than happy to let him inspect you all he wanted down there.
But this clinical setting, enforced by your organization was a little too much to bear. Wondering how to tackle this situation, you wander over to Tara who was humming as she made her medical bookings on her phone app. “Isn’t this exciting?” she squeals as she sees you. “God knows the dating pool is thin right now. This is just what I needed!”
Tara’s primary care physician was a woman, and you wondered if that was a pro or a con. On the one hand, dropping your panties for a woman doctor seemed less unnerving than for a man. But if you had a preference for men, would it work against your arousal? You shook your head at your ridiculous musings and focused on talking to Tara. “Are you really that excited about this?”
“You have no idea!” Tara taps her feet as she talks to you. 
“And you’re ok about having a woman stimulate you?” You probe, trying to gauge Tara’s reaction. Tara giggles and lightly pats your shoulder. 
“I don’t know but the idea is kind of hot. I mean, getting it on in a doctor’s office? Besides if I don’t like it, I can change the doctor the next time.”
Her words hit you like a ton of bricks. “You can change your doctor?”
“For this yes, the app gives you an option since it involves showing off a lot of intimate areas. You have to be able to trust your doctor right?”
You logged into the app, finding the little button to request a change in doctors, but for some reason, the page kept refreshing and crashing. With a sigh, you decide to get the worst of it over with and call Zayne, hoping he can make the change for you on his end. His voice is cool and professional when he answers your call.
“Yes?”
“So, you must have heard about…the new regulation?” you had put forth nervously.
“I am aware of it, yes.” 
“Well, for obvious reasons, I would like a different doctor.” 
Zayne smoothly says, “Of course. Patient comfort is always first. Do you have a doctor in mind?”
“Maybe my gynecologist? I tried doing it in the app but it keeps crashing.” There’s a moment of silence and you can hear Zayne’s fingers tapping away at his keyboard before a low hum leaves his end of the line.
“There appears to be a problem.”
“Problem?” you’d parrotted back.
“Yes. Because so many people are booking appointments at the same time, most of the available doctors are already taken. Including your gynecologist.” 
It felt like watching a bird crashing into a window in slow motion, that brief moment of hope that it wouldn’t hit the glass shattering in an instant. “Oh.”
There’s a pause before Zayne delicately says, “I’m sorry but it looks like you will have to make those appointments with me for this month. 3 of them according to the regulation. Hopefully, you can make the change for next month.” His voice sounded slightly apologetic.
“Won’t it be weird given that we know each other personally?” The question had fallen from your lips before you could stop yourself. 
“I promise not to treat you any differently than any of my other patients who are coming in for this inspection. I understand this may be a little unexpected, but I assure you I did a term of gynecology during my internship.”
A tinge of mirth carried over in his voice and you can’t help but make a noise of embarrassment. “Zayne, please!” His laugh was dry but not unkind, and you can’t help but want to hide your face even though he couldn’t see you. 
“Don’t worry too much. But I do advise you to make the appointments soon. My schedule is filling up rapidly.”
With those words, he’d disconnected the call and you were left wondering if an unknown god from another planet had cursed your existence. 
And changing doctors had proven to be more difficult than you’d thought. The entire organization seemed to be having a single thought. They had made appointments in the app almost halfway into the year, essentially blocking you from being able to do anything about your situation. Now on your third month with Zayne, you watch as he checks his notes from your last session, feeling like you want to scamper from the room.
The last two sessions had been incredibly stimulating, your arousal heightened by the fact you were attracted to Zayne. You’d never considered having someone watch as you touched yourself but found that you’d enjoyed it, at least, when it was him. He had remained professional, but you’d avoided him these last two months, save for when you had to get your monthly cardiac profile. He reads his notes from his computer as he prepares for your session. 
“Preferred device for stimulation still a vibrator, with a large, rounded, flexible head?” His eyes remain on his screen and you’re grateful for him giving you this smidgen of privacy. 
“Yes.”
“Preference for the doggystyle position still?” 
Your face burns. “Yes.”
“Still consenting for verbal stimulation?”
You nod your head.
“And still consenting for internal vaginal stimulation?” You make a noise of consent, squeezing your thighs together, your panties uncomfortably chafing against your already swollen pussy. 
“All right, I have everything I need.” He logs off and removes his lab coat, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt, revealing his well-corded arms, and your mouth almost waters at the sight of them. Clearing your throat, you shyly reach into your bag and pull out the vibrator in question, which he takes from you and clamps into a stand, adjusting it over the examination table you’d be on. A bottle of lube awaits on the tray next to the table and you swallow as he finishes the setup. 
“Whenever you’re ready,” he says in that deep voice, and feeling like your fingers are wrapped in thick woolen mittens, you reach behind you to untie the hospital gown you’re wearing, and it falls to the floor with a swoosh, your nipples pebbling under the sudden chill. A small set of sensors were taped to your chest and on the sides of your forehead, essential medical devices to ensure your orgasm was satisfactory. Unperturbed, Zayne gestures to the table and you make your way onto it, letting your feet settle in the stirrups as he settles on a stool between your legs, pulling on latex gloves before gently spreading your folds apart. You stare up at the ceiling as he does his initial checkup.
“Labia look healthy, no signs of trauma or abnormal discharge,” he murmurs, then runs a finger down the edge of the fold that separates your inner and outer lips, causing your core to clench involuntarily. You hold still, knowing very well he saw the action, holding your breath, letting out a little sigh as he lets go. 
“Normal reaction to stimuli, already semi-aroused,” he says, trashing the gloves and making another note on his computer. He glances over at you, leaning back uncertainly on the table. “You may begin.”
You swallow, then carefully turn onto your hands and knees, crawling towards the head of the table, grabbing the bottle of lube and squeezing the viscous liquid onto the head of the vibrator, avoiding eye contact as your breasts sway under the motion, nipples painfully hard from anticipation. You could feel Zayne’s gaze but can’t bring yourself to look up. Even though this was the third time, it hadn’t gotten easier, stripping naked and pleasuring yourself in his office. 
Once the rounded head of the vibrator is slick, you turn, the chill of the lube against your heated membranes causing more blood to flow into your already engorged nub, and run your moist slit across the surface to spread the liquid onto your slickened folds. Your hand fumbles for the little remote control and with a buzz, the vibrator turns on at the lowest setting. You click the button a few more times until it gets to the speed you liked, then fail to hold back a moan as the sensations pleasurably begin to take hold in your clit. 
The first time you had done this, nervousness had made you set the vibrator on the highest possible setting hoping to get a quick orgasm and sprint out of the office. Unfortunately, the sensors relayed this information into Zayne’s medical record that your climax had been unsatisfactory, and you had endured being lectured by him with the medical gown loosely draped on your body, your rear open to the cold office air. 
His tone wasn’t unkind but it hadn’t helped you feel better either. “It helps neither of us if you rush this. The whole purpose of this examination is to ensure you’re relaxing. I know it’s embarrassing but if you fail to have a proper orgasm, I’ll have to make you repeat the process until I get data that says otherwise.”
“The sensors are-”
“The only way to measure anything. Without involving another person anyway.”
His words had left you gobsmacked and your retort had died in your mouth. After that incident, you had learned. Even with the chagrin of having him watch you, you had learned to take your time and let the feelings build, leading to incredibly savory climaxes that made your body squirm from the aftershocks. 
Your hips sway, setting up a rhythm to brush your sensitive slit onto the head, letting it vibrate from cunt to clit, the lube aiding the frictionless sliding and making your core drip. Quiet noises of pleasure leave your throat as help yourself, arching your back and changing the curvature of your ass to maximize the sensations, then when the perfect pattern emerges, you let out a keening sigh, and try to remain still, letting the vibrator work its magic. 
Zayne, who has been quietly observing the computer this entire time, observing the spikes relayed from the sensors, asks, “Have you found your optimal pleasure form?”
“Yes,” you gasp, the timbre of his voice sending an arrow of lust into the deepest parts of your clenching core. You knew what was about to come next. The sound of Zayne’s desk chair moving, followed by the snap of latex gloves as he pulled a fresh pair onto those beautiful hands. He approaches the examination table and takes the bottle of lube you had set aside earlier, a wet squelching noise issuing from it as he squeezes it over his gloved hand, gathering the fluid on his index and middle fingers. He leans over to whisper in your ears; the verbal stimulation has begun.
The humiliating reveal that you had a heavy praise kink had come up during your initial session and despite your insistence that it wasn’t necessary, Zayne, the ever-diligent worker, had made a note in your profile, and he’d been fulfilling it each time. A tickle of hot breath near your ear, before he murmurs, “Are you enjoying yourself?”
The hum of the vibrator in the background coupled with his voice makes your breath catch in your throat. You nod, knowing you didn’t have it in you to form coherent words. 
“That’s a good patient. Good patients listen to their doctors you know. And you’re doing a wonderful job.”
Your hips snap back to push your clit against the rubber pad, letting out a whimper of pleasure, the action pushing your ass up higher, revealing your pathetically drooling cunt, fluttering with the dissatisfaction of being unfilled. 
“Are you ready?” He waits for your consent and you manage a husky, ‘mm hm’.
“Good girl. Take a breath.”
You inhale, trying to relax, then let out an uninhibited moan as Dr. Zayne inserts his middle finger into your needy cunt, the ring of muscles offering no resistance to the probing digit. He gently thrusts a few times, before curling the tip of his finger up into the delicate patch of nerves on your upper wall, the smooth come hither motion awakening a new level of pleasure in your body. Your fingers tighten on the edges of the table, sobbing, trying not to scream at the feelings that threatened to explode from you. He keeps up the gentle assault before asking, “Are you ready for another one?”
“Yes…” your voice comes out shakily, knowing you desired more than just his fingers, but that you would never get to experience it. 
“Perfect. So well behaved, taking exactly what I give you.” Zayne’s sensual voice floods your ear before his index pushes into you, the thickness of both his fingers sending you into overdrive. Your walls clench welcomingly around him, inciting an exciting pull of liquid heat in your abdomen, the muscles tensing in anticipation for the exquisite release you knew was about to occur. 
Feeling your inhibitions abandon you as you are stroked closer to orgasm your self-control slips and his name falls from your lips as he pushes over the edge.
“Zayne…” some partially functioning confine in the back of your brain registers what you had just involuntarily purred, but the spasms rocking your core, those gratifying waves of delight flooding your body made it easier to ignore it as your being is reduced to a pliant mess of pleasure. His fingers ease up as the fluttering in your pussy calms down, your clit pulsating weakly as the final vestiges of pleasure are wrung from your body. 
With a wet noise, his fingers leave your moist hole, the glove coated with your juices and the lubricant. Awareness finally comes crashing around you as you realize what you had uttered in the throes of passion. 
“I…I didn’t…I wasn’t in control…” You try to find a way to explain, to let him know you had very little choice in the matter of sobbing his name as you orgasmed, but everything feels flat, almost on the fine line between explaining and insulting. 
“There’s no need.” Almost as if he’s read your mind, Zayne matter-of-factly redirects the conversation. “It’s not uncommon to blurt out things during climax. Some people swear, and others call out names. It was a very normal reaction considering I was the one in the room with you.”
He throws the gloves in the trash and goes to check the computer, to ensure the sensors had given him the information he needed before starting the second round of the appointment.
“Oh.” You say quietly as he sits at his desk, feeling dejected. Although relieved he wasn’t making a big deal out of it, you can’t help but feel disappointed with his reaction. Shouldn’t a man be flattered when a woman cried out his name when she came? Maybe he really was treating you strictly as a patient. And here you were, pussy exposed and spread after being probed by his dextrous fingers, mooning over him like a high school girl. Perhaps the limit of your relationship with him was in fact, doctor and patient, the childhood friends aspect fading. 
So there was no romance here at all. You had a crush on him, and he was doing his job. Reality sucks. You sniff and suddenly feel cheap, and get out of the doggystyle position and try to find the hospital gown to preserve some of your modesty. Zayne glances over at your sudden movements.
“Are you cold? I can get you a blanket.”
“I’m fine.” You try to sound normal. 
“Your records show that you usually rest about 10 minutes before you are ready for the next round. Do you feel like that will be the case this time too?”
You find the gown and drag it up to your chin, covering your body as you lay back on the table. “Yeah. Actually a little sooner today maybe. I have somewhere to be.”
“You can’t rush these things. Your body will cum when it wants to. A forced orgasm doesn’t promote anything beneficial.”
“Well can we find a way for this to happen quickly and in compliance with the sensors?” You’re trying not to let your frustration show, the pleasantness of your orgasm fading. “I don’t think I have the patience to do two more rounds.”
Zayne listens to you impassively, but those amber eyes flecked with green had an underlying intensity you couldn’t place. “You don’t have the patience to do two more rounds?” He gets up and comes over to you. “You want to just leave then?” He approaches the edge of the table and there’s tension in his jaw. Perplexed, you look at him, his reaction unexpected. 
“No, I’m sorry, I know I can’t leave because of compliance and all that.”
“Compliance,” Zayne mutters under his breath before grasping your chin and forcing you to look at him, a gasp leaving your throat. 
“You’re getting frustrated because you have to do this a few times every month while being supervised? Do you have any idea what I have to do before you come in for these sessions?” His voice is a growl and you clam up, shocked by this aggressive display of expression from him.
“Every month I have to remain professional as you come in, pleasure yourself, and then leave. I have to endure seeing your beautiful body bare in front of me and control all my impulses to touch you, to not overstep my limitations as your doctor. I pleasure myself remembering the noises you make and ensure I’m well spent before coming in to do your appointments. You sit there, acting like it’s hard for you, but do you have any idea what you do to me?”
One of his knees is on the table, and he’s looming over you making you feel like a tiny animal caught in his fury. “It’s torture, to watch you. You’re not like the other patients I see. You never have been. Because with you, I always feel like I’m on the verge of losing control. Do you know how difficult it is to not do things to you that aren’t specified on your medical record? To have my fingers so intimately inside you, feel every little drop of pleasure clenching around my fingers, knowing at the end I can’t have you to myself? To hear you call my name and know that you only see me as your doctor?” 
Your face is a bright shade of red but you can’t look away from his face. His teeth are gritted, and when you dare to glance down, you see the noticeable bulge that has formed between his legs. He follows your glance and clicks his tongue, letting go of your chin. 
“I know I crossed a boundary today. It’s all right. You can go. I’ll reschedule you with another doctor. I know you didn’t want me in the first place.”
Your mind is a blur as you quickly reach out to grab his hand, your heart hammering wildly in your chest. His admission was like a prayer answered, and you weren’t going to meek about this. His breath hitches as he feels you pulling at his hand and gives you a look of uncertainty. Your lips part but the words you want to say refuse to come out. 
“Damn it,” he whispers ferally before his mouth captures yours in a rough kiss. It was wild and demanding, a contrast to the reserved, patient man he usually was. You’re swept up in the feeling of his mouth on yours, the taste of his tongue, and the softness of his lips. When you break apart, his hand cups your cheek, his eyes searching your face.
“This isn’t just because of the session right?” He asks keenly and you realize what he’s asking you. He’d been aching for you before this whole stupid policy came into place. The same way you’d been longing for him. 
“No, it’s not. I had a crush on you back when you became my doctor to check on my heart condition.” A sigh of relief leaves him before he tenderly presses his forehead to yours, and you’re caught up in the sweetness of the moment. 
“I just had to be sure.”
Boldly, you raise your head, delighted when he meets you, pulled back into his kiss, your tongues sliding over each other, your fingers tangling into his hair, scratching the nape of his neck, pulling him closer to you. 
You gasp as he breaks the kiss to drag his tongue down the column of your throat, pressing wet, open-mouthed kisses to the heated flesh, your blood humming in your veins as your eyes flutter closed. He pulls away the gown and pulls your perked nipple into his mouth, and you revel in the jolt of pleasure it brings you, each suckle felt in your clit which had already swollen up again in need. His fingers capture your other nipple, softly tweaking and pulling it and drawing little whines of desire from your throat. 
Your hand finds the junction between his legs and cups the heavy bulge, drawing a groan from him, palming him through his slacks, feeling it grow and tent the fabric under your ministrations. A low guttural sound leaves him and he gets off the table, and you almost protest until you see him dragging the small wheeled stool from earlier towards the table. He settles down on it, looping his arms around the tops of your thighs and pulling you closer to the table's edge until your feet find the stirrups again. 
“Stay open for me darling,” he instructs, his eyes glittering and you shiver as you feel his breath against your swollen folds. You squeak as he pushes your folds apart with his nose, inhaling your scent, his eyes growing dark with lust. “You smell delicious. I always wondered. Had to stop myself from sniffing my gloves after you climaxed. Not professional you know.” 
The musky tang of your pussy fills his senses, and his tongue darts out and dips into your slit, finding the swollen bud and licking it with just the right pressure that makes your toes curl and stars pop into your vision. 
Your hand rests on his head, tugging his beautiful dark locks, his name falling from your lips without barriers. Your hips rock against him, moaning, then let a sob as his lips suction around your clit. His fingers, free from the gloves at last, probe your entrance, scissoring inside to prepare you for what was to come before they curl up into that gummy patch that he knew too well. 
The sensations flood you, and the sheer knowledge of knowing you had Zayne touching you this way, unbound by the usual rules was sending you into a frenzy. Incoherent noises leave your mouth, crying out hotly as he teases the orgasm from you, your body shivering from the intensity. 
He wipes his mouth on the back of his hand and takes in your appearance, so soft and satisfied on his table, a dreamy look in your eyes.
“Are you prepared for the after?” he asks, you nod, more than eager to experience him. A sly smile crosses his face before he reaches over into the little chest of drawers by the table and pulls out a condom. 
“Hospitals have free condoms. It would be impractical to not use one when it’s on hand.” He explains seeing your questioning look and stands to undo his pants. You watch curiously as his cock is finally freed, eyes widening as it faces you, so impressive and veiny, standing proudly with a slight curve in its length. His pubes were neatly trimmed at the base, ebony curls visible behind the shaft. As he starts to roll on the condom, you feel your whole body heating up in anticipation. 
He leans down to kiss you before taking your feet and resting them on his shoulders, his cock at the perfect angle to enter you. As he sinks into your welcoming heat, you let out a sigh of longing, feeling the delicious stretch of muscle as he pushes up inside you, gasping as you feel his full length sheathe itself. As he bottoms out, his eyes close in bliss, hardly daring to believe that after all this time, he is finally getting to fulfill this private dream. 
Each stroke has him brushing against your gspot and kissing your cervix as he paces himself, feeling the primal urge to take you roughly and selfishly calling at his self-control. A growl leaves his throat as you whimper, straining towards him as the both of you struggle to keep a grip on reality. He feels the seductive way your walls clench around him, hears the soft noises you make, sees your face contort in pleasure with every roll of his hips. 
“Oh you feel so good,” he pants hotly, glasses askew, almost at the tip of his nose as he thrusts. “Clenching me so needily. Gonna milk me dry.”
Your response is a shuddering whimper, your back arching greedily to feel all of him, creating the perfect curvature to brush your clit against the base of his erection with each push of his hips. He feels the little bud on his heated skin, your combined fluids dripping onto his shaft, slickening the bundle of nerves with each stroke. 
“Be a good girl and cum on my cock the way you do on my fingers.” Zayne’s voice is husky as he tries to hold on, damned if he came before you. “I know you want to. I can feel the way your walls are spasming. They always do this pattern before you orgasm.”
The fact that he had memorized this knowledge of you was too much and you let go, your voice filling the room as you climax. Zayne’s hips stutter as he feels you around his length, pussy fluttering so him. His pace quickens, the sound of slapping skin becoming more and more urgent, his balls hitting your ass each time as he chases his orgasm. 
A shiver passes through his body as it happens and he buries himself in your warmth. You hum in satisfaction as you feel his cock twitch and pulse inside you as he spills his load. He pants, sweat on his forehead as he bends down to kiss you again, carefully lowering your legs which burn from the stretch as they settle on the stirrups. 
Threading your fingers through his hair, you brush your noses together, smiling shyly at him as he smirks, his eyes closing as he catches his breath.
“Can I see you outside of my office sometime?” he asks and you laugh at the invitation. 
“Are you asking me out on a date after having sex just once?” you tease as he grips the base of the condom and slides out, your pussy feeling the loss keenly. 
“I have been wanting to for a while. I was just wondering if I was misreading the signals. But I think I have a solid answer now.” He helps you sit up and cradles your body against his, idly stroking your skin, before gently removing the sensors off your body. 
“Let’s get dressed,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to your forehead after a moment of cozy silence, and the both of you hunt down your clothes. As he fixes his tie, Zayne passes by his computer and lets out an amused huff. 
“Something funny?” you ask as you button your blouse.
“The sensors definitely gave enough information to make anyone’s head spin.” You walk over and snort as you see the window, full of sharp spikes. 
“Well, at least I am guaranteed you had a good time.” Zayne’s eyes sparkle mischievously as he pulls you in for another kiss. 
“I’m not changing my doctor,” you reassure him as you pull away. There’s amusement in his gaze when he replies. 
“Oh, definitely not. I think if the Hunter’s Association ever sees this record, they’ll heavily advise you to remain with the same healthcare professional.” 
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tinystepsforward · 9 months ago
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What do you think the chances are that Mud Pit is gonna be ousted by the people who need Automattic to have good will in the eyes of the community to actually get anything out of this site and wattpad
I know it’s probably low but the fact that he’s acting like a poorer Elon Musk is making my skin crawl and making me hope that a second lawsuit hits the company
ok here's the thing. he is meant to be on sabbatical. automattic gives employees a three-month paid sabbatical every 5 years, so that they can have a break from the product they work on and come back rested and with a new perspective.
matt has never taken one before now. he spent the entire leadup to his sabbatical posting increasingly wild shit in public channels at the company (like the chess thing, or trying to get people to buy a friend's product, or the entire fracas with taking over the wordpress.org twitter account. wordpress.org is an independent non-profit that he is not the ceo of).
i mention this because people were hoping (including me) that he really would actually log off, have a chill time (or, idk, whatever kind of time CEOs who go off the grid bc they got flooded in at burning man like to have), and let the interim CEO get a chance to do a better job. that would help the board make a decision based on data.
he was very clearly spiraling before he even left, and then within the first few days of Company Sanctioned Log Off Time he's pulled multiple Classic Matt things on multiple parts of the company before showing up here. this whole thing is so deeply unfunny but it also is a bit of a tom and jerry or looney tunes bit, where i can only imagine HR or Legal is chasing him around the various accounts/platforms with a comically large inflatable baseball bat and he's just evading them.
he can't do that in person, but he still gets a lot of leeway generally. at the last division meetup (irl meeting for employees, flown from all over the world) he showed up twitchy and exhausted and hyped in a way that was very familiar to me from flatmates who used to steal and snort my adhd medication, then proceeded to drink so much over the course of an evening answering questions from his employees that he had to be firmly babysat off the stage and walked back into the lobby of the hotel to sober up.
i made eye contact with him that night, before he dropped his head back into his hands. two people relatively high up in the company were sitting with him, silently watching him as he struggled to sober up. it wasn't the first drunk shenanigan of his i witnessed at one of these, and this is purely opinion but i have to assume that his current behavior is the result of suddenly having time on his hands to have the world's longest bender and post through it.
back to your question: i do not know if what he's done is enough to get the board to remove him. i wish it didn't have to come to this to hope that they will. but we'll find out.
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valeriele3 · 6 months ago
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✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲
𝒮𝑒𝓁𝒻-𝒜𝓌𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝐻𝑜𝓃𝓀𝒶𝒾 𝒮𝓉𝒶𝓇 𝑅𝒶𝒾𝓁
✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲
✎ Sorry for the somewhat rushed ending! ^^;
✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲
Messages.
Idle chats.
You were answering them like normal. Sometimes even giggling on the messages
✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲
You log in, check your messages, answer them if there's one, do daily tasks, and maybe farm, then log out. That was your daily routine in HSR.
However, you begin to notice how much more frequent the chats are. After assigning an assignment, you get a new message. 'Oh well. Free jades," you thought.
Every time you beat an enemy, boss, or do anything in the game, you will notice a new message.
'Maybe it was an update? Or a bug?' You brushed it all off and thought nothing of it.
You would answer all of them wholeheartedly; after all, you also noticed that if the character liked what you said, you'd receive more Stellar Jades.
You'd talk about it with your friends, but they'd respond with "I wish", "Oh shut up~ Don't make me hope", and "Hm? Is your game bugged?? Or is mine bugged? I don't get any of those benefits..So unfair."
You try to check the dev logs to see if there was an update regarding the messaging feature, but whenever you try to look at them, your computer freezes.
'No matter, I can just check using my phone.' No luck; it also freezes.
'Maybe my tablet?' Still the same.
Frustrated, you ask one of your friends to look into it. "There's no update or any fixes on it, Y/N. Maybe you should report it; your game might really be bugged."
✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲
Deciding to report it, you open up Bug Report, but then your screen freezes again.
It then opens up the messages, and you read the following words:
| Hey
| Please don't do it.
| It took such a long time to break the code, you know.
| Hey
| Are you still there?
| Oh
| Right
The messaging bubble pops up.
| You can type now.
"W-What.." You stare at your screen dumbfounded.
Reaching out to your keyboard, hoping it won't work and choices will pop up, you press a random key, and it works
Startled, you immediately plugged out the cables on your computer, causing it to shut down.
You grab your phone and start messaging one of your friends. Before you could hit send, the screen blackened, and then in the next second, it lit up with a notification.
"Hey, we were in the middle of a conversation."
"Why did you suddenly leave?"
Your hand trembles. 'Shit, how..How did it get to my phone too..'
"I know I like reading self-aware au's but I didn't want it to actually be true!" You scream, throwing your phone across the room.
You can hear it dinging with new message after new message.
You decide to leave your room for a bit to calm down.
✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲
"Ok..Be calm..I'm probably dreaming, right?"
"There's no way this kind of thing will actually happen in real life."
"I need to think about this rationally. I could try to get my phone and computer fixed..Maybe I accidentally got a bug."
"Oh, my tablet too..It probably has the same bug.."
"Then, uhm, should I tell them about this? No, maybe..Agh! This is so frustrating..!"
After going back and forth, you decided to sell your gadgets instead of trying to repair them. Buying new ones is much cheaper than trying to get them fixed.
✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲
The first month was alright. You also stopped playing HSR just in case something of the sort would happen again.
However, everything changed when you awoke to your notifications going off like crazy.
【Luka】
| Hey! Y/N, wanna come watch my tournament this week?
【Qingque】
| Y/N
| This is urgent. Come to Exalting Sanctum
| Watch me go against this pro. I'm sure with your attendance I'll easily win.
【Robin】
| Y/N, would you like to come watch my concert?
| Don't worry! I made sure that you'd get the best seat.
【Sunday】
| Y/N. Do me a favor and attend Robin's concert, will you?
| If you don't..
| Well, it'll certainly make her sad. As for me, it's best you don't know.
【Arlan】
| Hello, Y/N
| Would you like to accompany me with walking Peppy?
【Blade】
| Come.
【Bailu】
| Y/N!
| I have made a huge discovery!
| Meet me at Aurum Alley!
【M̵̛̼̘̭͎͓̘̘̽̎̃̊̄͋̈́̑̇i̵̡̨̡͎̖̮͉̺̣͂ͅs̴̰͂̉́̅͒̆̄́̄̋̚͜͠͠͝ͅȟ̵͉̹̖͍͎̱̭̳̰̘̀a̵̧̨͔̣̘̮̻̐̆̌̀͑̊̄̄͌͗̓̌͘̕̚】
| C̷̛͇̬̥̼̲̙̠͓̭̺̱̻̟͖̜̾͑͋͊́̀̕͝ä̷̡̨̨̨̡̤̫͔̼̗̫̪̟̰́̏́̾̄͘͝ͅn̸̡̪̱̻̜̻̺͊̍͒̂͗̀̍͐̔͆̆̎̚̕̕ ̷̀��̛̻̟͐͋̋̌̂͒́͑̏͝y̴̮͆͒̈͒͑͋͆̒̂̓̕͘̚͝͝o̸̩̫̰̤͌̈͝ͅu̷̻̗͉̥̺͕͉͔̠̯͇̭̖̐͜ ̵͖̲̼̥͑͝ḣ̵̟͓̆͌̄̑̂̈́̓̚͘̕͝͝e̷͖̥̜̅͛̂̒͒̕͜a̶̧̫̹͉͆͑̊͊̊̐̐̂̈̉̾͜͝r̶͎̫͛̑͊͌͐̎ ̴̢̢̛͓͉̮͇̞̬̪͔͓̦̾̓̈́̀͐̀̂̀͒͝ͅm̴̤̙͎̽͋̽̇͛́͑͌̃͑̊e̷̦͚̔́̔̀̒͊͂̔̕̚͝.̵͎͓̪̥͍̍̓͂̾̌̂̌̚̚ͅ.̵̨̟͉͕͈̜͎̻̗͓̯̜̜̩̓̈́̓͊̆̓̑͐̈̐̄̀̕?̵̙̠͚̆͊͊̇͌
【Aventurine】
| Why're you ignoring my calls and texts?
| Is the money not enough for you?
【Pela】
| The Tale of the Winterlands original artbook sold out in 1 second again
| But
| I was fast enough to get you a copy too
| Don't worry. I'm messaging the right person this time
【Natasha】
| Y/N, did your cold get better?
✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲
You stare at your phone, frozen. Even as you were sitting there staring at it, the messages continued to flood nonstop.
It
Was
Nonstop
Even if it's on silent mode and DND, you can still hear it dinging.
At one point, the messages started appearing in all the social apps that you use.
Hell, it even started appearing in your smart fridge
You deleted and deactivated everything. Throwing away any and all sorts of electronics that could potentially be used for apps.
But you could still hear it.
Even the sound of the doorbell ringing, the kettle whistling, or your telephone ringing makes you panic. 'What if that's them?' You always think
Every creak, every shuffle, and every little sound makes you paranoid.
What if they cross over to Earth? What will you do? You can't run from them. Even if you do, they'll be able to find you easily.
821 notes · View notes
erenjaegerwifee · 4 months ago
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✧₊⁺ Crushing pt 2
✨yall asked and shall receive! Here’s a part 2 of this drabble. I hope Yall like it! Don’t forget to like, comment and reblog!
✨Warnings: MDNI 18+, friends to lovers, belly bulge, fingering, p in v, neteyam writes on you
✨Word Count: 2.3k (this was supposed to be a drabble).
✨ all my characters are aged-up! If you’re uncomfortable please do not interact with my post.
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“So y/n can I ask you something?” Neteyam mumbled as you both sat together eating some fruit he picked for you. It’s been a couple of weeks since he saw you wearing that his name on your back and since then he’s been easing you into the idea of spending time with him. He has successfully managed to make you set a couple hours just for him alone which makes him extremely happy.
“Go for it” you answered waiting for his question, “I saw an avatar the other day, he had a tattoo on his shoulder and it reminded me of the Metkayina when we went…I know it’s also a human thing, have you ever considered getting one?” Neteyam asked sweetly.
His ears twitched as he looked down at you sitting so cute and small on the log, he looked like a giant next to you, but that wasn’t something that bothered him anymore after he over heard Kiri and Lo’ak talking to you about like na’vi men. He knows he has a shot he just needs to act before someone else does.
“Oh yea I have a couple right now I was hoping to get some more, I like how they look I just can’t decide what to get” you chuckle. Your laugh was ever as beautiful but that’s not what caught his attention this time, how could he have not known u have tattoos already, all the man does in his spare time is look at you.
“You have? Since when?” He asked his tone was surprised, you expected it, no one besides the woman who gave you the tattoo knows you have them. It’s not a secret really but you just never thought anyone would care. You thought it was cute neteyam was so interested. “I got my first one when I was 19 and my second about 6-7 months ago. It just finished healing.”
You’ve had this tattoo for years? And he’s never seen them? How? “Can I see them?” He blurted out making you giggle, “I can’t show you out here silly”Oh so these are intimate tattoos, even better.
“I have one behind me ear and the other on my ribs” you gestured to the places with your hands as you finish eating the fruit. “I’ll show you, let’s go back to the lab” you jump off the log and Neteyam follows suit walking behind you.
When you arrive to the lab neteyam pushed the door open for you to walk in and you take your mask off and he grabs one throwing it around his neck. Neteyam followed you through the hallways bending down so he could fit, he looked cute crouched down like that.
You walk into your room and shut the door behind you, Neteyam naturally made his way to sit on your bed, it was a big bed he could fit there easily but it was low to the floor so when he sat down, he was almost at your height but not quite.
“Ok look” you walked up to him and stood were his knees were and pulled your hair over your shoulder pulling it back for him to see the cute atokirina behind your ear behind your ear lobe (I’ll put pics of the tattoos I imagine below) it was small he couldn’t see it probably from his far away you were.
Instinctively he put his large hands on your bicep and waist and pulled you closer slotting you in between his legs. His head moved closer to see you your tattoo and your felt his breath on your collarbone as he looked at it.
You’ve never been in this kind of compromising position before especially not with neteyam. It made you slick, you squeeze your thighs together hoping his amazing na’vi nose doesn’t pick up in the scent change.
“Atokirina…” he whispered next to your ear “Tsal lu yuey sìn nga” (it is beautiful on you) his voice made your shiver, you took a deep breathe trying to calm your raging hormones. Neteyam’s hand that was on your bicep now ran through your hair pushing it back more and brought his head down so his lips could touch your tattoo.
You gasped at the feeling of him kissing you there, it was always a sensitive spot for you. Your eyes shut as his tongue darts out to taste your skin, “taste like you..”
“Neteyam… it’s healed you wouldn’t taste the ink” your voice was breathy and your legs felt weak. It was only when he heard your voice he realized what he was doing to you and boy did he love these cute reactions, “where’s the other one?”
He pulled back his head and look at you, your face was slightly blushed and your lip was trapped between your teeth, “here…” you raised you r-shirt up to right under your bra pointing to the tattoos of the knife curved under your left breast with 2 feathers hanging off the handle.
Neteyam recognized that knife, it was the one you made go him when he passed his rites of passage at 15 years old. It was 10 years ago but he never changed that knife for anything. “my knife”
“Well yea I thought it fit nicely in the spo- what are you doing neteyam” his hands moved to the base of the t-shirt you were holding up and pulled it swiftly over your head exposing you in your bra and cute shorts. Your bra was a pretty baby pink with a bow in the center.
“Neteyam!” Your hands fly down to cover your bra, “mawey (calm), just want a better look.” He pulled your close by your arms that were crossed on your chest and then pushed them out of the way so he can see the tattoo. His head dipped examining the details that are his knife on your body.
His lips met the stop kissing it before darting his tongue out making you suck in a breath. “You look beautiful, so so pretty with these, you want more?” He asked you.
You nodded your head meekly at him trying to stop your panties from leaking. “Where?”
“M-my back maybe, my thighs” you said softly. He smiled, his head came back up holding his body up to his full height. Neteyam’s hands sat on your hips running up and down twisting your small frame in his hands. He loved the way his fingered unintentionally touching when it crawls up to your waist.
He has you so close to him, his scent invades your nose so you could imagine how strongly you must smell to him. “Tell me to stop?” You didn’t say anything. You didn’t want him to stop.
Neteyam kissed you softly on the lips, his finger tips squeezed your flesh as he ran his tongue over your bottom lip. His lips were so soft and tender. His mouth was much bigger than yours, his kiss progressively got more heated and his grip on your body got more intense.
You pulled away feeling Neteyam strain his body for air and brought the mask that hung on his chest up to his mouth. Neteyam took in a deep breath looking at you with his golden eyes. He is so fucking fine!
He pushed you aside and grabbed a dark blue permanent marker that sat in your desk. He pulled you onto his lap making sure you get comfortable before he leaned back against the wall next to your bed. “Gonna let me draw some tattoos on you baby? Want one here right?” His large hand slide up your thighs making you shiver and you nodded your head meekly.
Neteyam opened the marker and slipped his head to your neck sucking in your soft skin. Your human skin bruised so easily he absolutely loved how sucking on you for 3 seconds could turn you red.
Your eyes were closed as you took in the feeling of his tongue on your skin and his hand moving lightly with the cool marker pressed against your leg, you couldn’t see what he was writing so when he pulled away na moved the marker you looked down at your thigh. There in bold capital letters was NETEYAM on the entire length of your thigh.
The slight made you blush, is he staking claim? Is this some kind of ownership? Whatever it is you are loving every part of it. You don’t touch it not wanting to smear the writing but you glance up at him only to see him waiting for your reaction.
You lean forward and kiss him roughly on the lips. “Neteyam will you do something for me?” You pull away batting your eyes at him, “anything baby”
“Fuck me” your request caught him off guard but he proceeded anyways. He picked you up and laid you on the bed softly, he kneeled on the bed in front of you pulling off your shorts and underwear in one swift move. Neteyam laid on the bed next to you throwing your left leg over his thighs, and pushing your right up in the air spreading your legs. Neteyam observed your soaking folds gliding a finger through them collecting your slick.  
He brought the finger up to his lips to taste you with a sweet hum he brought his finger back down to circle your clit. With another finger he slid into your weeping hole. You head your head on his shoulder as you watch his movements with him, his other arm was thrown over your shoulder keeping you close as he finger fucks you open.  
Neteyam added another finger then another speeding up his pace until he was shaking your entire lower body, “Neteyamm AHH” you scream when you gush on his fingers. Your head was buried in his neck kissing his warm skin softly as he assaulted your cunt.  
Neteyam pulls his fingers out licking them clean before be lays flat on his back and moves you to his lap, straddling his hips. “Now baby, where else do you wanna get a tattoo?” Your mind was woozy as you stared at him, you still felt the stretch of his fingers in your cunt. Your hands press onto his abdomen leaning forward, your hair fall in front of your body. 
Neteyam wraps as arm around your back and with his fingers he unhooks your bra ad falls down your arms exposing you to him. Your tits bounce when they fall free and Neteyam’s eyes were glued to them. You took notice and guided his hands towards them so he can touch you. 
You bit your lip feeling the way he tugged on your nipples. “I- uh, I think on my collarbone and my back, my legs, maybe right over here” you run your fingers over the side of your waist where it curves inward so perfectly. Neteyam didn’t waste a moment scrambling for the marker and pulling you close right his initials, ‘N.S.’ above your collarbone where your shoulder meets your neck. 
Then he moved the marker down writing the nickname you call him ‘TEYAM’ vertically down the side of your abdomen. He dropped the mark after admiring his works and pulled you up to sit on his abdomen while he unties his loincloth. You drop your body down kissing his while he does, your breast press against his hard chest as you stick your tongue in his mouth fighting for dominance which he won. When you pull away a string of spit connect both your lips and he raised you up laying you on the bed and him on top of you.  
Your body is dwarfed beneath his as he lines his cock up with your dripping slit and slowly push into you. This is the first time you’ve ever seen a cock so big you weren’t sure it was going to fit in you. As if he read your mind, he bent his body over so he face is in front of yours and kissed you, distracting you from the painful stretch.  
You focus all your attention on the way his tongue moves so seamlessly with yours and you don’t even realize when he’s bottomed out inside you until you hear his grunt. “So tight baby, so fucking tight” Neteyam groaned, his head dropped down onto your shoulder and you wrap your legs around his sexy waist and locked them together. 
Neteyam started moving slowly listening to your loud whimpers, you’ve never been so full before. “Tey, s-so full” he pulled his head up to look down at you admiring they blush that traveled down your hot skin. His eyes traveled down your body, watching the way your tits bounce with his every thrust making him speed up to see them bounce harder.  
His faster pace made you tear up, your jaw was slack you couldn’t even form sounds because he was fucking you so good. Neteyam admired the writing he left on your skin, and his eyes made it to your tummy, your every full, bulging tummy. His eyes widen slightly as he watched the imprint of his huge cock moving in and out of you. When he bottoms out, his tip was right up to your belly button. 
When you come on his cock your moan loudly and gush on him. Neteyam felt his entire cock get wetter in your snug cunt and his head dips down into your tits sucking on your nipples as he speeds up his thrust. He pulls out and lends back stroking his cock so he can cum on your body, “Fuck, fuck gonna cum on you baby” he whimpers as his cock shot up onto your breast and stomach.  
Neteyam was panting as he dropped to the side of you looking at the mess he made of your body. He grabbed his discarded loincloth and whipped the cum down and off your body pulling you close to him, “You did so well for me baby, are you okay? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” he asked his voice was concerned. “No, no it was amazing tey” you said in a weak voice.  
“Hey baby, next time I see my name on you, want it to be permanent.” he kissed your neck wrapping his big arms around your body. And who were you to deny him what he wants? 
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Taglist:
@rivatar @xylianasblog @strongheartneteyam @delusionalwh6re @nilahsstuff @m1tsu-ki @kylimarz @quicktosimp @its-jennarose @r11k4 @xrollingmyeyesx
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fcthots · 6 months ago
Note
I log onto tumblr sometimes just to see your posts lol, and I love all the smut content, but I was wondering of you’d write something for a reader who isn’t feeling up to having sex one night, and they’re worried about how Jason will react but instead of being pushy about it Jason just cuddles the reader and affirms that they’re valid?
(I might be going through it a bit and feel this would be nice to read)
Thank you!! Also I think I needed this too lol
He was running on that post patrol adrenaline rush that leaves him looking for any outlet of release. Usually one in particular. You. He comes in through the window of the living room and lets his boots thudding on the ground be your warning. Before he even closes the window, his helmet is taken off his head and dropped to the carpet. He’s usually so careful about his precious equipment but desperate times call for desperate measures.
The clatter of his helmet is loud, much louder than his boots. You can hear it from under the water of your bath. You lift your head above water, and by the time you clear the water from your eyes, he’s standing in the doorway. His chest is heaving. You can see the tight coils of his fists, the lines of tension in the shoulders, the clench of his jaw. You know what he’s looking for.
But tonight isn’t the night for that.
You don’t stop him when he kneels on the ground by the tub and takes your dripping face between his hands, or when he kisses you with the enthusiasm of a starved man. His hands trail from your face to your neck and then trail down your collarbones, and down more. You pull away.
His hands stop. His face tilts like a confused puppy. There is a slight worry in his eyes, and unspoken what happened.
The words are hard to find. “I don’t um. I don’t think we should-. Maybe it would be-.” His hands trail down to yours. He holds them in his and gives a light squeeze, an encouragement, a go on. “I just don’t quite feel up to it tonight.”
He gives you a small smile, one reserved for you and you only. He gives your hand a gentle kiss, and then your cheek. “Ok. That’s alright. Ain’t nothing wrong with that.”
You search his eyes for any sign that he might be lying. You can’t find any but just to be safe, you ask, “are you sure?”
He tilts his head again and smiles. “Of course I’m sure.” He moves his body to make himself more comfortable sitting on the ground. He brings his elbow to the lip of the tub and rests his chin on his hand. “So what have you been up to while I was gone?” The easiness of the question makes you feel a little warm and fuzzy. There’s just something about the casual tone in which he says it, like he wasn’t planning to fuck you not even five minutes ago.
“I’ve just been in the bath.” You swirl some of the water around for emphasis. His nose scrunches when a few droplets of water hit his face. You try to hide your laugh.
“The whole time?” You were hoping he wouldn’t ask. You’ve had to rerun the water a few times after it got cold. You just couldn’t get yourself to get started for some reason.
“Yeah.” You watch the calculating and searching look in his eyes. He doesn’t ask why. You don’t want to explain, not right now.
“Do you want me to wash you? I don’t mind. If you’re ok with it that is.” He moves to sit on the lip of the tub. You just watch him.
“You wouldn’t mind?” He’s already answered the question, but doubt lingers in the back of your mind.
“I’d be happy to. My hands really need something to do right now. Washing your hair would help.”
You smile and nod as you bring your knees to your chest. You wrap your arms around them and drop your head down to watch him reach for the shampoo. Maybe it was something in his training, but that man is incredible at scalp massages.
581 notes · View notes
cattonicdragon · 1 year ago
Note
Man your work is great :D could you do Astrid hiccup tuffnut ruffnut and snotlout with a small jolly reader(4 feet tall) that riders screaming death or a titan wing catastrophic quaken.(I just like the this short joyful person next a GIANT creature that looks like it squash you like a bug it's just a bit funny to me XD)
Astrid,hiccup,the twins(separately) and snotlout x reader who’s a short ball of joy and rides a screaming death
Decided to do screaming death cus I love them
<<WARNINGS:abit of angst,snotlout not likeing spitelout,mentions of injuries(dragons mainly),snotlout needs a hug,spelling errors probally>>can you tell I don’t know how to do warnings?
HAS BEEN PROOF-READ
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Astrid
She is absolutely stunned
Your so tiny.and yet you managed to tame the screaming death
She nearly had a heart attack the first time stormfly and the screaming death play fought,she still nearly dose after she gets used to them
She knows your screaming death won’t hurt stormfly,but as the good dragon rider she is she gets worried for her dragon
She may not admit it but she’s extremely cocky over the fact that one of the dragon riders on their side managed to tame the screaming death,with is defiantly no easy feat 💀
She genuinely questions you on how on earth you managed to tame the screaming death
She’s amused by the size difference between you and your dragon
Little ball of joy and a island destroying demon/pos
Due to your small size she can easily pick you up
She picks you up under your arms and you can only dangle there
You’ll just have to hope your screaming death is feeling nice and might scare Astrid to put you down
Don’t think you being small is all fun though.
Is stormfly is particularly pissed off by the screaming death she will pick you up by the scruff of the neck and run/fly off with you
A chase will ensue,that may or may not have to end up with hiccup and/or having to sort it out
She admires how you can stay so sweet and joyful
She may or may not admit it but she adores your personality,in hard times you can seem like a bright light in a endlessly dark hallway,and she couldn’t be more grateful
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Hiccup
Also nearly has a heart attack
The screaming death defiantly had some bad blood with him and toothless
But with you,it’s like a big cat/dog and almost completely docile
How?
Ok well maybe the fact that he made the screaming death plummet face first into a rock wouldn’t help
Your tinny compared to hiccup and even tinier compared to the screaming death
He worries that you may become a large target for dragon hunters
Toothless and the screaming death,don’t exactly get along
I mean years of hatred and bad blood isn’t going to fix easily…
But the you and hiccup will find them curled up together
You don’t understand them but that’s ok
He asks if he can examine the screaming death,or maybe ride it.riding is a less likely option though 💀
He will wince or cringe if he sees any scars or damage he may have caused
He can relate to you being positive and joyful alot
But can also be abit jealous,how can you stay so joyful even in some of the most stressfull situations
He’s so unimaginabley grateful that your there for him during the entire time
You decrease his stress tones
It also feels like a weight off of his shoulders with the burden of having such a great relationship with a endangered and powerful dragon,you’ll stick together and get through it though
He also picks you up,and makes fun of your height.
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Ruffnut
Probally one of the only ones who dosnt almost have a heart attack
If anything she’s jealous that you managed to tame such a cool and destructive dragon
Begs asks if she can have a ride just one please?
Will try everything and anything with the screaming death
You will need to supervise 24/7 sorry not sorry
She brags about you all the time
She loves your short size and will toss you over her shoulder/hold you like a log
She’s teases you about your size WAY to much,please tell her to put a sock in it T.T
Barf,belch and the screaming death become the faces of Loki day
Barf and belches personality might have slightly affected your dragon but oh well
Loves to cause distruction with you
If you don’t go on a mission she’s not going either,even if tuffnut begs.
She enjoys your joyful personality and loves that there’s someone that slightly carefree
She also feels like she can be more reckless now that there’s a island destroying dragon on the riders team
You will have to keep an eye on her,or lecture her.either works
Will Loki you hard,unless the screaming death is around.she dosnt want to become 🧀 today thanks
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Tuffnut
Also dosnt get a heart attack
Instead he gets destructive zoomies
He begs you,like hands and knees and everything
For one chance to either ride or cause destruction with the screaming death
Jokes on you though if you say yes to either,the other will happen anyways.there’s no winning in this situation sorry
Surprisingly knows when to give the screaming death space
He’s reckless but sensible
Will bribe the screaming death to go on destructive trips constantly
He makes fun of your height,more than ruffnut
Chiken and the screaming death surprisingly get along the best,unlikely but wholesome friendship for the win
Chiken by proxy loves you a lot aswell
So if tuffnut loses chiken he checks you and the screaming death basically first
Somehow carries around a stall with him so you can get to high places when need be
Will kick ruffnut off barf and belch for a ride if you asked
Man Is whipped for you
Don’t leave tuffnut alone with the screaming death though,either he or someone else will die
He at some point becomes something of a second rider to the screaming death,it’s a lot of bribing and treats though and also the fact that he encourages the screaming deaths destructive tendencies
He likes your joyful ness,will also try to bribe you to help him get out of situations he gets himself into
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Snotlout
Probally faints during first encounter
Is very worried for everyone’s saftey,it’s a similar situation as to when they took in the injured singetail
Complains a lot about the fact that allowed to bring the SCREAMING DEATH to berk/the edge
He admires you Aton
Your short,shorter then him and look at you go!
Gets a bit jealous of you and may think he’s not good enough
Give him a hug :(
One time during the longest day he ended up snuggling against the screaming death,and survived.after that day they grew abit closer which was sweet
He enjoys your optimism and it’s a good balance since he can be abit pessimistic sometimes
If his dad ever comes to visit and your around he finds himself gravitating towards you,he feels safe with you
Hook fang and the screaming death like tug of war.why?,who knows
They like to play catch with each other aswell,again no idea why
He asks if you want to ride with him and hookfang quite a lot,it’s his way of non verbally getting recognition and validation
He finds himself being a lot less pessimistic when your around and just in general,your jolly personality is infective and effective
He likes to just hug you when he’s feeling down of tired
He picks you up places you in places where you can’t get down easily
He pisses off the screaming death.quite a lot
He likes writing books for you and indulging in your hobbies aswell
Shows you off a ton,as long as you don’t mind though,he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable
He likes knitting things for you
He also likes it when you both are in the same room,you can be doing something different or even just being quiet,as long as your there he doesn’t mind
He likes to spar alot aswell,but he never lets it get to the point where either of you get hurt
He’s very protective of you despite the fact he dosnt really need to be
He just cares alot
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1K notes · View notes
royalarchivist · 10 months ago
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Fit: I... I made a promise to you when you were sleeping, and I'm going to keep that promise. The next time that Pac logs in, I'll have a sit down chat with him and I'll... I'll be honest with him, ok?
Ramon: wedding?? spring wedding??
Fit: No- [Embarrassed laugh] No, um. We're not even technically dating, Ramon! We're not even technically dating, so that's- that's kinda quick. But–
Ramon: "technically"
Fit: But here's the catch Ramon – if I'm going to tell him how I feel, I also need to be honest with how dangerous it might be for him, you know? 'Cuz it would be... it would be selfish to like, try and move things forward and not let him know that it could be really dangerous, you know? So I think it's – we need to be honest with him.
Ramon: i think he would understand
Fit: I hope so. I sure hope so.
Ramon: he made a promise to me
Fit: [Chuckles] Well, if he made a promise to you Ramon, he better keep it! That's right, you don't make promises to my son and do not keep them! No, it's all going to be good though, Ramon. Like I said, even though we've got 'til March 1, we have a lot of data already. We've collected data on Cellbit, on Etoiles, on Tubbo, lots of the Island residents. I think we should... I think I might need a little more though. I don't want to piss off my boss.
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changisworld · 9 months ago
Note
Can I request a roommates with chan where you’re in your room masturbating and Chris’s room is right next to yours but you don’t know that he’s home so he can hear you getting yourself off? He’d probably try not to hear but can’t help but get turned on and start masturbating while moaning a bit too loud but he doesn’t notice you hear him until he realizes that you’ve made your way into his room and he’s all embarrassed but you reassure him that’s it ok and decide to ride him so good he’s seeing stars lol 😂
OMG YES?!? THANK YOU SO SO MUCH FOR THIS IDEA OMFG you have no idea what this ask has done to my brain
i got a bit carried away so it’s longer than i expected but the more words the better am i right😆
i hope you enjoy it!!🫶🏼
OBVIOUS 18+, MDNI PLEASE!!!
WORD COUNT; 2,319
**smut warnings under the cut**
©ANY translation, copy & paste, posting of my work is strictly forbidden for ANY posts/ writing i post.
any comments/ re blogs are deeply appreciated!!
main masterlist here
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SMUT WARNINGS; subby chan, softdom?reader, mention/ use of sex toys(dildo, R using), mention of alcohol, mention of past encounters, embarrassed chan, pet names(gorgeous, baby etc) soft sex, aftercare, BIG DICK CHANNIE TROPE, playful biting, creampie, confessing of feelings at the end :3
You have just gotten home from an extremely long tiring day at work & from getting groceries since you knew your best friend & roommate bangchan, would be far too busy at the studio to go grab some. You wouldn’t be surprised if that man had a bed built in that stupid room due to how long he spent there, you had to act like his mum at times & force him to eat because that man would constantly forget so him buying groceries was basically zero chance.
You put the groceries on the counter & stretch & sigh then just stand in silence for a second, appreciating but also quite saddened by the quietness. Truth is, you get quite lonely & down due to how much chan is away, always wanting to speak to him & watch movies with him proved to be difficult with your busy schedule & his even busier one. But one thing you’re thankful for is because he’s gone so much, you don’t need to worry about him walking in on you masterbating there’s nothing you love more than pulling an orgasm or two out of you after a long day & that would obviously prove more awkward & difficult if Chan was in the next room over, through only one thin wall separating you both.
As soon as you finish putting the groceries away you’re practically skipping up to your bedroom, practically stripping yourself along the way. you run past bangchans room on the way, only wearing your dress pants & bra at this point, holding your shirt in your hand & your shoes discarded by the front door as you came in.
As you get into your room you don’t bother to shut your bedroom door, not needing to since nobody’s home, right?
You finish getting undressed & basically leap onto your bed, grabbing your favourite vibrating dildo from your bedside drawer & your computer before logging in & going straight to your go to channel on the hub. Your favourite porn star is hot in every aspect, gorgeous rock hard abs, strong arms, a slightly large nose, gorgeous plump lips & most of all, a huge dick. As much as you don’t want to admit it, his body reminds you so much of chan, but you try push those thoughts out of your mind as you start toying with your clit with the fingers you just licked, preparing to use the dildo.
Within no longer than five minutes you are fucking yourself open with the vibrating dildo, using the balls of it as extra pleasure on your clit, you are pinching your nipples at the same time for the extra pleasure, looking over at the computer screen as best as you can since your eyes keep closing. the whines & moans leaving your mouth are u surprisingly louder than the sound of the vibrating toy currently being squeezed by your pink walls & you feel that familiar knot being built up in your stomach when the toy died.You realise you forgot to put it on charge this morning & you screamed internally. You let out a cry of desperation as you quickly try to use your fingers to fill the void but your orgasm had already failed. you get up on slightly shaky legs to go find the charger when you hear a hushed whine. You turn to look at the computer screen, still playing but you know your favourite stars noises & that definitely wasn’t him. you pause your computer & you hear another moan, a bit louder than the last. Your mind freezes in the moment, chan was HOME you quickly throw a pair of cloth shorts & a baggy shirt(that’s actually chans that he lended you) on before you go & knock on his door, panicking internally. Nobody answers the door so you think for a second, hoping chan wasn’t home but then you heard a rustling noise from inside & without thinking twice, you creak open his door, shocked but also not surprised at the sight in front of you. Across the room, at his desk is chan with his back to you but you can tell he’s jerking off. You don’t know how to react for a second but decide it’s weird that you’re just staring at him so you let out a small cough.
“You,eh, coulda told me you were home chan”
Chan instantly jumps almost out of his skin & looks at you with a red face, damp hair & blown out eyes as he starts rambling.
“fuck y/n i’m sorry! i eh, i got home earlier, i was gonna tell you i was home but then you… you know, didn’t wanna interrupt, heh.”
Chan says, not looking at you anymore, trying to tuck his dick back into his underwear.
“Well by the looks of it, i’m interrupting something now? were you… jerking off to me chan?” You raise your eyebrows slightly, quite flattered at the idea.
“goodness no y/n! i- i’d never!! promise!”
His face goes even redder in the dim lighting as he stands up to walk over to you to try plead his case.
“chan don’t sweat it, it’s hot to be honest, i mean, it’s flattering i guess, don’t you agree?” you walk over to him so you’re face to face with his gorgeous one, looking into his eyes innocently as if you have even one innocent thought in your head at the moment.
“you’re, you’re not creeped out?” Chan says, surprised. He acknowledges the lack of personal space between you both & he gets quite flustered & you can tell, you take one of his hands in your own.
“no, afterall we are best friends chan, ive seen basically every part of you over the years, you fingered me once in a random persons bathroom at a party for goodness sake, ive seen you throw up on the side of the street due to too much alcohol, nothing should embarrass you, i mean nothing embarrasses me anyway”
you laugh slightly & decide to put your hand around the back of his neck & pull him slightly closer to you & you lean into his ear & whisper; “if you want this i’m more than happy to give it to you chan, judging by how hard you still are in your pants, i think it’s safe to say you do want it, hm?”
Chan doesn’t say anything but his reddened face speaks a thousand words, before you can second guess yourself, you lean in & kiss him. It’s a lot different to what your previous drunk kisses have been like, it has more… emotion? there, you get butterflies in your stomach this time as you kiss him, more than any other time.. you’re both using tongue but it’s quite tame, not overwhelming but you are still able to taste eachother. His hands find themselves at your waist & he pulls you further into him, not breaking it.
You nor chan are completely sure when you ended up on his bed but you both did, you’re straddling his lap, his shirt now gone again showing his gorgeous abs, even more stunning & better looking than the pornstar you were “obsessed” with, you now have the real, the better version in front of you. Chan is making out with your neck as his hands are on your ass & you’re slowly grinding on him.
“As good as my shirt looks on you, it would look better off, dontcha think?”
You nod instantly & lift your arms up so he can pull it off you with ease, showing your stunning tits with your even prettier nipples, hard & reddened. Chan let’s a small whimper escape as he looks at them, his grip on your ass tightening.
“take off your shorts too y/n , please baby, fuck you’re stunning”
you blush at his words & waste no time in taking your shorts off before climbing back on top of him, but not before helping chan also take his pants & underwear off again, leaving you both nude. You notice instantly how big his dick is, atleast 7 inches you think to yourself & so so thick, your mouth waters instantly. You grind yourself along his length as he looks at you with a shiny look in his eyes, almost as shiny as his cock now that your slick has ran all over it. You grab his base & begin to line yourself up when he stops you.
“Doncha need some sort of prep y/n? don’t you want me to finger you or eat you hm?”
you smile at his words but allow yourself to slide down, really slowly.
“I already prepped myself with the dildo i was using earlier handsome, i dont need it”
you smile at him innocently, as if he isn’t stretching you out insanely, no amount of using your favourite dildo could ever compare to this.
You both let out a whimper at the fullness & warmth you are both feeling, chans noise however coming out more like a whine. You collect yourself as you begin moving up & down his length, making sure to clench to watch his face contort with pleasure. Chan looks up at you & cups your face before pulling you down to kiss him again as he uses his other hand to trail down your jaw, neck, collarbone than landing on your nipple, he pinches it & twists it which makes you let out a needy groan into his mouth & you feel his dick twitch inside you.
“y/n you’re so fucking wet, how are you this wet? fuck, you’re a goddess.”
You smile at his words before kissing him again.
The noise coming from the room is nothing short of pornographic, the sound of the clapping of skin, wetness of your pussy getting stretched open, the whines & moans coming from you both & also the sound of spit being shared between you both.
Your pace begins to slow down due to sore legs & you start to sound more desperate.
“Aww, are you tired babe? want me to do the work hm? just say the word baby, i’m all yours.” He looks at your tired expression with nothing but lust, slithering his hand down to start toying with your clit which makes your eyes shoot down & you moan even louder.
“no, i just- i wanna please you okay baby? let me.”
You gather the rest of your strength & plant your feet on the bed & start riding him as if you would die if you didn’t, you lean backwards onto his legs so he could get a clear view of your pussy as you start to feel what you were robbed of earlier in the night. “fuck y/n you’re so beautiful, nothing on earth compares to this, absolutely nothing at all.” you blush at his words but don’t…can’t think about what he’s saying for too long as you feel your insides bubbling up.
“fuck chan, you-you’re so deep ima, ima cum” you whine, looking into his eyes, your hair sticking to your face & out of breath. You sit up again & start grinding on him, using his pubic bone & trimmed pubes as friction against your clit to push you over the edge, at the same time you cup chans balls & start needing them with your fingers
“fuck beautiful, ima cum too, where can i cum baby?” Chan seems & is even more finished than you are, so why not let him completely tip over the edge?
“in, inside please baby, want it, so ba-fuck channie i’m cumin’!”
Your sentence is cut short as you cream his dick & you start spasming on top of him, unable to keep going through this burst of pleasure. the second you clench on his dick as you cum, he cums too. you feel the hot seed fill you up inside & it adds to your own pleasure. Chan throws his head back & groans so raspy & whiny,gripping your hips as hard as be can to keep you planted on him.
As you both come down from your highs, you flop forwards so you are now laying across his chest, nipples touching & you lean into his neck & kiss it softly.
“If i knew this would have been the outcome, i woulda took your dildo off charge as soon as you left for work a whole long time ago, pretty girl”
He laughs as he tilts his head to the side to get your hair out of your face to kiss your forehead
“you dick! i knew i put it on charge this morning! who says i wouldn’t have came to you a while ago if you had threw hints at me!”
you playfully hit his chest & bite his cheek.
“i did throw hints at you! i think? maybe in just a scaredy-cat so it wasn’t obvious butttt y/n i guess i eh kinda like you?”
you can’t help but blush at his words & your heart races. you sit up so you can look at him properly.
“i guess i like you too” you roll your eyes playfully when you feel chans dick twitch inside you. “You’re hard again?? you just came!” You giggle at his reaction, turning his head away from you & covering his eyes with embarrassment.
“what did you expect? my best friend & crush of YEARS just said she likes me back? if you had a dick you’d do the same trust me. anyway, do you mind getting off my dick so i can get us cleaned up?”
You squeeze his cheeks & lean down to kiss him before getting off his dick & watch him wipe his sweat off before throwing a pair of sweatpants on to go get you both water.
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onskepa · 4 months ago
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Left Behind: Moments
Here is another chapter of the left behind series! Hope you all enjoy!
Left behind series
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Jake’s pov 
“So ummm…..I was told to vlog my day to day stuff. Guess to keep record of things I do and not lose my shit on this planet” Jake tells himself on camera. It has been a few hours since he woke up from his cryo sleep. His body ached, felt like a statue from not moving for 5 years. 
“This is year is 2154….those fuckers lied. It's been 7 years since I left Earth for this jungle gym crap. 7 years felt like nothing. My baby girl, probably in her preteen years right now. I wonder how she is doing. I wouldn't blame her if she hates me, no scratch that. She is incapable of hate. Maybe mad, yeah. But not hate. I want this mission to be done and over with.” 
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Jake’s pov
“First day in my avatar…gotta say, it felt fucking amazing. I was able to breathe the native air! Best part, I can run! WOOHOOO! YES! Oh man, never in my life have I felt this amazing. Though I did get carried away. When I woke up in my new body, the excitement got to me. I ran almost all over the fields, the basketball court, the botanical gardens, it felt great. Almost got in trouble but grace was there to save my ass” 
“Still have to adjust to this body, grace is giving me a week to get used to it. I am not the only one though, there is a weird guy named Normal Spellman. Nerdy but otherwise cool. He is the one who studies alongside with tommy. Good pals I can only imagine. He just got his avatar too”
“I bet if my baby girl was here, she would be surprised. With everything really. Maybe a bit scared. Would enjoy it no doubt. Learn how this planet works. I cant help it. I wonder what she is doing. Is she making friends? Doing good in school? So many things. But I know the sooner I get this mission done, the sooner I get home to her” 
“Gotta rest now, got a big day tomorrow, this is Jake Sully, singing out” 
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Jake’s pov 
“Colonel Quaritch, tough and kinda scary guy but he keeps people safe here. As safe as it can get on this planet. Met him in the brief meeting as a welcome home type of talk. But, weirdly enough, I admire him. He seems to know what he is doing and how to do it. Said he has a special mission for me, didn't say what yet but to expect a visit from him soon” 
“I can worry about that later. Tomorrow starts a new mission. Get samples from more remote areas of the forest. Norm was given a special task. Try to make a peaceful contact with the aliens here. Na’vi is what they are called. Grace gave me a brief on them. Some important figures too. Guess they have a system of rulers here. Like the old native tribes back on Earth. My missions is to guard and make sure grace and norm get what they need” 
“I will be honest, does not seem too bad. Was given the ok to shoot any possible threats. Practice with the guns, proud to say I have not lost my aim. It is getting late but I still have to do this. Does keep my mind busy, recalling the day’s events. I am starting to get into a routine” 
“After shutting off the camera, I look at the picture of me and my daughter. I would stare at it for a while until my eyes drop. See this? It was the day I won a little toy for her at an arcade. She was so happy. Not often was I able to give her something new. Hopefully the paychecks are getting funded for her needs. I bet she is getting nice, brand new things” 
“So many birthdays I missed. Im so sorry baby girl, but I promise, the second I go back, I will give you the biggest hug ever. Buy you all the gifts you could ever want, hell, if the pay is that good, get a better place. Maybe close to your favorite park that you like to play in. Better yet, go to the zoo like you always wanted. I know you will be much older but I dont care. You are my baby girl for life. Nothing is going to change that” 
“Guess now I better log off. Big day tomorrow, this is Jake Sully, signing off”
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Jake’s pov 
“Things didn't go right during the mission and I was split up from grace and norm. A giant weird animal, thana-something called by grace, deadly, found us. Had his eyes on me, grace told me to run so I went the opposite direction of where those to were, to not get them in the crossfire. Seriously, that animal was huge, but I guess by some miracle, a bigger animal came into view. Like in those old nature documentaries, the two giants began to fight. Either way, I made a run for cause I know it was not going to end pretty” 
“I got lost along the way, had no idea where I was or how far I was from the crew. Took me sweet time though. Admiring the pretty sights that Pandora had to offer. Felt like a kid again. Everything was bright, colorful, alive. I can see why the RDA wants to use the resources here. Crazy to think that Earth was one like this. Green, healthy, breathing” 
“Of course somewhere along the way I lost myself even more, lost my gun. Had to make a spear then turn it into  a torch because night came. Now night time felt like a whole different world. Everything glowed, pretty almost neon colors illuminated the plats. Some small creatures also glowed. Sad that I couldn't appreciate it enough. Got attacked” 
“Freaking hyena looking animals, running in a pack. The fire helped create a distance as I ran but they were too many, though I was done for. My ass got saved by an unlikely person” 
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Jake’s pov 
“Neytiri, princess of the Omatikaya clan. Scary lady but she saved me. Called me a baby, and told me that I have a strong heart. Stuff happened and next thing you know, I am in their home base. Word passed and neytiri was tasked to train me. Teach me their ways. I am where the RDA needs me to be. It is now only a matter of time. Give the Colonel what he wants, give grace what she wants. It is a win-win situation” 
“Still holding out on that little meeting Quaritch wants to have with me. Maybe it won't be that far, since now I am within the premise of the indigenous, I guess I need to collect more info” 
“A lot happened so to say. I gotta rest soon. If allowed, I can bring something from here, take it with me when I get back home. Pictures seem the best answer. Or something na’vi related. My little girl knows so little of what is being told about pandora. Or knew I should say. How old is she now….? Probably a preteen. Guess I dodged a bullet. I know pre-teen years are hell. No, I shouldn't say that” 
“Soon baby girl. The wait will be worth it. Like I promised. Training day begins tomorrow, so, with that, this is jake sully, signing out” 
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Jake’s pov 
“I am part of the people. I am the son of the people and child of Eywa. Passing my iknimaya, taming my ikran, everything. I am na’vi. It feels unreal, hard to accept. Tsu’tey and I are brothers, wasn't that long ago he wanted to kill me, calling me ugly, but now we are at the same level” 
“They celebrated my rebirth. It was fantastic, neytiri made me dance even though I was terrible at it. The whole thing felt magical. Truly, I felt like I really belonged somewhere, being accepted. It felt nice. Just when I thought it couldn't get any better, it did get better” 
“Surprise surprise, I am now mated to neytiri. She took me to the tree of voices, telling me of how sacred and precious it is, being able to connect to their ancestors. It was beautiful. Neytiri was beautiful, still is. Taking my breath away, and my availability” 
“I wouldn't change it for anything, she is someone I have come to love with all my heart. As cheesy as it sounds, it's true. Neytiri changed me, made me better, and I have no regrets”
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Jake’s pov 
“They are starting to pressure us, more like me. The RDA really want the omatikaya gone, away from their home tree. Just because it houses the materials they want. It is not easy, none of it is easy. To tell them to leave, when it's been their home for thousands of years. According to Grace, I don't doubt her. This is their home, it is us who are the aliens” 
“They are not going to leave, nothing is going to change their minds. Worst yet, I know quaritch will do drastic things to get what he wants. I was an idiot to follow him, to believe him. What he will do, knowing his tactics, he will shed blood and bullets. I need to warn neytiri, mo’at, tsu’tey. Can't believe this is coming out of my mouth, but I pray to Eywa, that she guides me. What can I do to make sure things don't go downhill” 
“I came to make good money, to finish the mission given to me and be done with. Now, I am in a moral dilemma. I am stuck” 
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Jake’s pov
“I am sorry. No amount of sorry’s that I say will ever be enough for anyone. Not to neytiri, not to eytukan, not to mo’at, tsu’tey grace, norm, anyone. It will never be enough. I brought this to them, it is only right that I help. War is coming, and soon. So many na’vi died when they destroyed their home tree. Many wounded, kids, infants, innocent lives” 
“Grace and I did our best to warn them, tell them to leave. Tsu’tey was adamant to fight, their weapons useless against the valkyries. In an instant, all was gone. I wanted to apologize to neytiri, she was furious, telling me I am not one of those people. She is right. Before anything more could be done, those damn bastards forced me to pull out. Pushed me in a tight closure” 
“Quaritch, a beast he is, heartless. Keeping me locked up yet outside of my cage he dangles the picture of my little girl. Telling me it's not too late to take his side if I ever want to go back to earth and see her again. Going on about how she will react to all of this. Her father rebelling against humanity. As much as I hate to admit…”
“He is right….I dont know if I will see her again. I hate to say….sacrifices have got to be made. I'm sorry, but I have to atone my sins. Like I said, no amount of sorry’s will be enough. Not even for my little girl, I am sorry baby girl, but daddy is not coming home”
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Jake’s pov 
“We won. Quaritch is dead, and unfortunately, so is Grace and tsu’tey. Both sides lost many lives. Yet that is war, but we won. Humans are no more, many left, only few remained. Sworn their loyalty to the na’vi. Only they can stay. We made many sacrifices, I made many.  Many I dont regret, or will look back to. This is the beginning of a new chapter for me. There is nothing left to hold me back, not my past, not my memories.  I am at peace with what I did” 
“Neytiri is with a child, I am excited, I am going to be a father. I cant wait when they arrive, I will be there, welcoming my son or daughter into a new world of peace. First born, neytiri likes to say it over and over.  She is not wrong, our first child together in a new era of peace” 
“However there is still one thing left to do. A grand celebration is going to be held” 
“This I look forward to, many are coming together for it. It is my birthday after all, can't miss my own party. So, one last time. This is Jake Sully, the human, signing out. For good” 
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Third pov
A young girl looks at the last vlog of her father, Jake Sully, eyes wide as she takes in what she just saw. This was a side she never knew, nor did she think it would be hidden.  
She clenches her hands into a fist tightly, gritting her teeth, her body shaking in fury. Hot tears streaming down her face, not knowing whether to cry in sadness or scream in anger. So many emotions mixed, creating a tornado in her mind. 
Hearing a door open behind her, she turns to glare at the man. 
“Why….” was all she could say before breaking down.
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Aaaaaaaaaaand that is it for this chapter of the ongoing series! This one I chose to have only jake be the main point, his vlogs. See how his mind changes, perspective and what lead to the final choice. Trust me, this will come back for future chapters. So until next time! See ya!
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wobblesthecowgirl · 5 months ago
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Hii! I literally love your page so much! If you don’t mind, could you write an Arthur x Fem reader fluff?
So I was thinking, Arthur and the reader are close friends and she has feelings for him, like I mean she is HEAD OVER HEELS for him! But she thinks that he likes Mary-Beth or something and somehow he finds out about her feelings towards him and how she thinks he likes Mary-Beth and he confronts her and is like “I don’t like her I like you” and they kiss or something idk I JUST NEED HIM SO BAD RN😭
I Only Want You.
Arthur Morgan x Femreader
I apologise for the long delay! But thank you so much for your patience and request! I hope you enjoy it! And thank you so much for the love! <3
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⋆。‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧。⋆
“Why not write him a letter?”
Y/n was sitting on a log with Abigail under the sun, looking out to the beautiful scenery before them on the edge of the cliff. They were discussing Arthur, a common topic between the two, and Abigail was trying to convince her friend to finally confess.
“A letter?” She tilted her head.
Abigail nodded, “Yes! I mean, you love to write, and you’re too much of a baby to speak to him about your feelings. I think a letter is perfect. You can leave it for him without seeing his face.” 
Y/n thought about it and agreed it wasn’t a bad idea at all. She could sneak into Arthur’s tent with a letter telling him everything she’s always wanted to say, and wait for a response. So, she smiled and hugged her friend tightly, before standing up quickly and making her way to her own tent to begin writing. 
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
This was harder than she thought. She assumed being able to sit and think carefully about what she wanted to say would be easy, but it just filled her head with more doubts. Before she could start her fourth draft, she heard a ton of horses outside and quickly hid the crumpled up pieces of paper. Most of the men were robbing a wagon and had just come back; from the cheers and laughs, she could only assume it went well. She got up from her chair and peeked her head out of her tent and almost screamed in surprise. Arthur stood right outside her tent.
“Oh! Mr Morgan, you scared me!” She laughed it off, a hand to her chest as he chuckled with her.
“I apologise, I didn’t mean to sneak up on you. I just wanted to tell you how the robbin’ went.”
“I assume it went well, given the smile on your face.” Y/n smiled as she looked around to the other men already cracking bottles of beer. The pair went quiet and the woman wanted to burst into a confession then and there. The sun was setting and it casted a orange glow to his face. His hat caused a small shadow over his eyes and his smile was small and earnest. The little wrinkles around his eyes and mouth only made him more attractive, and his moustache had been recently trimmed. 
“Well, I best get back inside now. I’m a very busy lady.” She excused herself. He smiled a little wider and watched her close the tent, almost disappointed with their short exchange. 
After their conversation, Y/n got back to her desk and this time, the words began to spill out onto the page with ease:
Dear Arthur,
Firstly, I must apologise. I am too much of a coward to face you, so I’ve resorted to writing this letter.
The truth is, I have fallen head over heels for you. You may not agree with me, but you are a good and genuine man. You’ve helped me in more ways than you could ever imagine. The day you rescued me from my burning horse from the O’Driscolls, I thought my life was over. But, to my surprise, it was the start of an even better life. I truly can’t thank you enough.
I don’t expect you to reciprocate these feelings, and that is ok. I wouldn’t want to ruin this friendship we have formed.
Yours, Y/n.
She kept re-reading it over and over again while a million what ifs ran through her head. What if he’s put off by the letter? What if he has someone already? What if he laughs at her? 
She shook her head. She had written it now, all she had to do was plant it in his tent and hide, wallow away in bed while her anxiety ate her up. She folded it and wrote his name on it before peeking her head out the tent again and tip-toeing to his tent. When she saw he wasn’t inside, she snuck in and placed the letter on his bedside table. 
Y/n felt satisfied with herself, until she saw a letter on his desk with the name ‘Mary Linton’. Her stomach dropped. Who was this Mary? Was she a lover? A relative? Feeling sick, she rushed out the tent, leaving her letter behind.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
“You alright there, Y/n?” Tilly asked her while she zoned out. It was now night-time, and her mind was eating her up all evening. The women were sat around the fire doing what they do best: gossiping. Of course, Grimshaw or Molly hadn’t joined them, but that was always the case. 
“Hmm? Sorry, yeah I’m good.” She brushed it off, taking a big swing of whiskey. The rest of her friends spared glances at one another. Karen piped up while also taking a swig of her own whiskey, “Yeah, I ain't buying that. You’ve been sulking all evening.” 
Y/n sighed and began biting her nails out of habit, wondering if asking them about Arthur was a smart idea. But she couldn’t keep letting the question eat away at her.
“Do any of you know who Mary Linton is?”
Mary-Beth looked surprised at the question, “Mary? You don’t know?”
Her stomach dropped again. 
“No I don’t.” 
Tilly shook her head, already feeling bad for her friend. Everyone but Arthur knew that Y/n had feelings for the older man, it was a miracle the man himself hadn’t figured it out. Tilly sighed, “She used to be his woman. About ten years ago now, but her daddy didn’t like him so it didn't work out. I keep telling him to let it go.” 
There it was. Her what ifs became reality. She couldn’t hide her disappointment and took another swig of the whiskey. And another. Then another one. 
“Slow down girl! You’ll end badly!” Tilly tried to grab the bottle out her hand but she moved it out of her reach. By now, Y/n vision was hazy and her head felt light. The smell of whiskey was strong on her breath but she felt a little more relaxed at least. 
“It’s obvious Arthur likes you back.” Mary-Beth tried to help her feel better, but all she did in response was roll her eyes.
“Oh please. Don’t get my hopes up.” She pouted as she finished the whiskey off. All the women were getting up and getting ready for bed but she decided to sit by the fire a little longer. Karen patted her back, “Please just take it easy. Get some rest soon.” And with that, she was left alone. She just stared into the fire, her mind restless, when she heard a twig snap. She snapped her head back and saw the root of her problems. He looked confused at her state. 
“Y/n? What are you still doing at this hour?” 
“Nothing.” She frowned, facing away from him, kicking a stone away despite being sat on the log. Arthur sat down next to her, his knee inches away from hers. 
“You smell of whiskey, doll. You been drinking too much to handle?” His voice was laced with concern, which only infuriated her more. Why care for her when he already had a woman he cared for? 
“Why do you care?” She sounded harsher than she meant to. Maybe it was the alcohol. Maybe it was her patience running thin. Maybe it was her disappointment. Either way, her response still shocked him. 
“Why wouldn't I?” He asked, and her heart kept sinking lower and lower. They fell silent, and Y/n heard him reach into his pockets and took out the letter. Her eyes widened as she tried to snatch it out his hands but he raised his arm higher. 
“Just leave it Arthur!” She shouted, still trying to grab it as he kept his arm in the air, a firm hand on her shoulder to push her lightly. 
“Why are you behaving like this? I just want to talk about it.” He tried to calm her down as she stopped prying at him. 
“I know about Mary.” She stated which caused his eyes to widen slightly. He glanced at the letter before folding it and putting it back in his pocket. 
“The women gossiping again?” He chuckled a little dry, so she only hummed in response. Their gossips were never wrong though, she thought to herself. 
“That's history, love. She was only writing to me to help her brother,  but I don't like her like I used to.” Arthur grabbed her chin much to her alarm, and gently turned her to face him, before brushing a strand of hair in her face out the way. 
That damn smile. 
“I love you too. I ain't need a silly little letter, you could've told me and I would've swept you up in a heartbeat.” 
It's like time stopped. The alcohol must've gotten to her head. She must've blacked out. Died even, and seen the pearly gates. 
But when he leaned forward, and softly kissed her, she felt more awake than ever. He pulled away before she could even react, and his face was bright red. 
“Was that a bad kiss? It looks like it was.” He coughed awkwardly. 
“No…no not at all. I'm just in shock. I didn't think you actually liked me.” 
He laughed light before leaning closer again, a hand on the back of her head, “I don't like you, sweetheart. I love you.” 
This time she kissed back, harder. Months of pent up tension between the two was finally being released. It was surprising the two didn't go mad.  
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
They spent the rest of the night sitting next to the fire, holding hands, and Y/n rested her head on his chest as he held her close. His tumb traced her knuckles as she listened to his heartbeat. She felt protected, safe, warm, and comfortable. She could happily stay like that forever.
Unknown to the pair, the women of the camp were watching from a distance, with giant grins on their faces.
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impala-dreamer · 8 months ago
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Tell me a story about reader trying to hide something from Spencer Reid (fluffish)
A Not-So-Secret Secret
Spencer Reid x F!Reader
Fluff and Secrets and Pregnancy Revelations
Impala-Dreamer’s Masterlist  ~  Patreon  ~ Published Works
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It was like trying to play tag with God. You took a step, and he followed. You turned a corner, and he was there waiting. It was fucking impossible. He seemed to be everywhere at the same time; his light brown eyes forever following you around, detailing and documenting every odd move and every evasive answer. It almost made you feel sorry for the serial killers he interviewed and every suspect he’d been in contact with.  
Almost. 
While you were becoming increasingly infuriated with his passive observational skills, you were still determined to keep it all a secret. Soon, you would make your little announcement, apologize for being so moody the last few weeks, and give an excuse for all the seemingly random running out of rooms you’d been doing in the early mornings. Soon, you’d sit him down and spill the beans; pray that he’d be OK with it all. Soon. But trekking through the damp woods of Vermont while looking for an UnSub was neither the time nor the place. 
Even though he was a few yards ahead, you could somehow still feel him watching you. It was as if he had eyes behind his head, or, at the very least, a bit of ESP that transcended the physical limitations of the human body and let him watch you no matter where he was. The internal workings of his mind were surely a sight to see. Maybe someday, you mused, you’d put him in an MRI machine and map his genius in real-time. 
Fallen branches snapped under your boots and the fog chilled your bones. The FBI windbreaker you’d grabbed instead of your usual wool coat was not enough to stave off the dampness. Pausing for a moment, you cupped your hands and breathed into them, hoping to take the frozen sting off of your fingertips.
Spencer heard your footsteps stop and spun around instantly. 
“Are you OK?” His voice was low but his concern carried easily through the trees.
A deep breath squared your shoulders and you prepared to resume your hike. “Absolutely,” you replied with a wink and a smile. 
He knew you were lying. He always knew. What he didn’t know, you hoped, was why. 
To your left, the heavy flapping of wings caught your ear, and you turned to see a large black bird taking flight. You followed it upwards, watching its impressive wingspan darken the sky as it ascended. As it faded into the gray sky, a line of smoke appeared about half a mile away. A chimney. The scent of burning logs floated by on a cold breeze and the smell turned your stomach. Quickly, you dropped your face into your hand, desperate to hide your gag. 
Spencer was a foot away when you straightened back up. His eyes were narrowed, his lips drawn into a tight pink line. He let his hand hover over your shoulder, unsure if you’d allow it to land. 
“Y/N-” 
Clearing your throat, you brushed him off with a reassuring but fake smile. “I’m fine.”
“You’re not.” 
Damnit. “Spencer, if I say I’m fine, I’m fine.” You crossed your arms and tried to stand your ground but another wave of nausea struck you. The wretch clicked in the back of your throat and you swallowed it down, hard. “Let’s go,” you insisted. “I’m freezing.” 
He sighed. “I told you to wear a sweater.” His hand fell lovingly on your shoulder. “You know, the weather in this area this time of year can-”
You cut him off harshly. “I do not need a lesson on the weather patterns of New England, Spencer!” 
He flinched at your tone and slowly curled his fingers as he lifted his hand away. He frowned and nodded thoughtfully. “Sorry.” 
Your heart sank and you cursed every wayward hormone and chemical in your body. “No.” You shook your head and sighed. “I’m sorry. I’m just…” Moody and terrified. Starving yet nauseated; freezing yet sweating… “I’m cold and I wanna get back to the hotel. This is getting us nowhere.” Did I mention I’m gonna throw up if I have to keep smelling that fire? “Let’s just hurry up and do what we came to do so I can go home. OK?” Also, my feet hurt and I’m a little dizzy.
He studied your face for a long moment and then nodded. “Let’s just go. We’re only a mile from the car and I doubt we’ll get much further before you pass out.” 
His words flowed in one ear and out the other before spinning around and slapping you in the face. You jolted. 
“Uh, what?” 
“You’re shaking and you’ve gone a little pale.” His hand returned to your shoulder. The weight was reassuring but his words had you on edge. 
Do you know? You stared up at him, eyes narrowed in suspicion. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I said I’m fine.”
His other hand pressed gently against your cheek and you melted into the comforting warmth. “You should probably eat something too. I have saltines and water in the car. It’ll settle your stomach.” 
Son of a bitch. “Not hungry,” you fibbed, “but thanks.” 
A gurgle from your stomach told otherwise and you gave up. Tiny tears welled in your eyes and you sank into yourself a bit. Busted. Found out. Betrayed by your own gut. 
Spencer smiled sweetly. “You know I know, right?” 
You rolled your eyes. “Well, I do now.” 
He pulled you close and kissed the top of your head. Wrapping your arms around him, you settled your head over his heart. 
“When were you going to tell me?” he asked. 
“I don’t know, when my water broke?”
He laughed. It vibrated through him. “Why were you afraid to tell me?” 
With a sigh, you pushed away to look up at him. He was handsome and messy and you wanted to punch him in his stupid perfect face for being so smart. “I wasn’t afraid, I just… wanted to… I don’t know, I mean, we never talked about kids or anything but-” 
He stopped your ramble with a kiss and held your face gently in his hands. “It’s a good surprise,” he whispered. “We’ll figure it out, OK?” 
His smile was honest and you relaxed. “OK.” 
“Good.” 
“But seriously, I need to eat something or I’m going to puke all over you.” 
The walk back to the car was somehow easier. Perhaps it was the relief of not having to hide anymore, or maybe the prospect of crackers ahead. Either way, it felt as if you were floating over the dead leaves. 
“I did hide it pretty well though, didn’t I?” 
He laughed under his breath at your query. “Yeah. Pretty good.” 
Who’s lying now?
“When did you figure it out?” 
Spencer pushed his glasses up a bit and looked off towards the big black SUV waiting at the edge of the forest. 
“Few weeks ago,” he admitted. 
“Really?”
“Yeah.” He smiled. “You left the pregnancy test on the sink.” 
Son of a bitch…
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grippingbeskar · 2 years ago
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Ok so, i ADORE your writing and i wanted to submit a request for a joel miller x reader fic ^^
Specifically its the readers first time out of the qz since 2004, she snuck out on her own and was found by joel in the woods. She slightly pisses him off because she can be somewhat annoying but he eventually falls for her! You can go anywhere you want with it but please add that she calls joel “cowboy” bc i find that to be so cute
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warnings: swearing, slight mention of past violence
a/n: okay this isn’t edited but i wrote it all in one go cause it’s so damn cute. i couldn’t help it. thank you for sending this in!!! i hope you like it! clearly i needed a lil fluff now that there’s no more tlou eps so i hope it’s what u wanted 😭
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“You’re gonna get yourself killed.” Joel’s gruff voice growls from behind you. “Stop moving.”
“Stop talking! You’ll scare it!” You whisper-yell back, scootching your body forward on the rock. “Oh, you have to come down here.”
“I’m not gettin’ anywhere near that thing.” Joel huffs, and you roll your eyes, unable to bother with a reply when you can see what you can in front of you.
A bear. A giant, fluffy, brown bear. Standing on its hind legs, clawing at a tree trying to get… something down off the branch. It’s the first time you’ve seen a bear. The first time you’ve seen anything alive bigger than a dog. It’s massive.
“Joel, come on! Look at how adorable it is!” As much as he complains, you can hear him groan as he leans down, knees cracking and breath puffing out in clouds. He eventually crawls up next to you, the broad length of his body pressing against your side on the narrow face of the rock.
The bear was now rubbing its back on the newly scratched bark, roaring quietly as it yawns. The sun was shining seamlessly through the trees, and the forest was just starting to lose the heavy layer of snow that had built up over the winter. Warmth flooded your body from your toes to your ears, but you couldn’t figure out if it was the rising sun or the way Joel had sidled up a little closer, craning his neck so he could see, too.
He leans to the right, squinting into the open forest, and yes— it was definitely just Joel making you sweat.
“See? Cool, right?” You say softly, keeping your eyes on Joel’s reaction. It had taken so long for him to speak to you in any capacity, let alone indulging your curiosity with something like this. You were still hesitant to upset him, or piss him off, but he didn’t seem to be either of these things much anymore. At least, not directed at you.
“Yeah, alright. It’s pretty cool.” He admits, watching as the bear roars a little louder. All of a sudden, three tiny balls of fluff crawl out of a hollow log and begin to roll around in the melting snow.
Your face lights up, you can tell it does. Your grin stretches across your face embarrassingly big, but— “Oh my god. Baby bears. Freakin’ baby bears, Joel!”
He laughs quietly, and you can feel his eyes on you, but you don’t dare move. Even though him staring at you burns you enough you’d swear it wasn’t winter, you keep your eyes forward. The last thing you want to do is scare him off— not when he’s the closest he’s ever been.
You know he wouldn’t feel the same, but it was impossible not to have some kind of feeling for him. He was practically a knight in shining armour to you— without him, you would of died the day you snuck out of the QZ. But there he was, scowling and buried under layers of warmth, layers he’d reluctantly shared with you until you could feel your fingers again. He’d saved you, and you had fawned over him ever since.
He was definitely not on the same page— it was only in the last few months that he’d learned to tolerate you, and somehow it was only making your crush worse. Those famous scowls turned to smirks and hidden smiles, and harsh words melted away into something like fondness. You could hear the care behind the orders he gave you. “Don’t do that” shifted into “Its not safe.” “Shut up” was whispered into a soft “Shh. Listen.”
It might not seem like a lot, but in terms of Joel, it was miles.
The bears continued to roll around, play-fighting while their mother wandered further over to the rushing lake. You shivered as the sun disappeared behind the clouds, and Joel’s hand tugged at your jacket.
“Come on. We gotta get moving.” You sighed, but still smiled as the smallest of the bears attempted to climb a tree, and fell off with a ‘plop’ into the snow. “You’ll be warmer if we’re moving.”
“Just a little longer. Look at him!” The bears continue to fight their way up the tree unsuccessfully, and you wait for Joel to move away. You silently beg him not to, and maybe it works, because he keeps still. No, not still.
Blink and you miss it, but you don’t. You feel him move— just an inch, but he comes closer to you. Touching you all down your side. It stops your shivering, and you find it very, very hard to focus on the bears.
 ─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
“Just a little longer. Look at him!” You laugh lightly, your head facing forward in the direction of the bears. Joel can’t take his eyes off you, no matter how cute some bears might be. It was humiliating. He couldn’t take his eyes off you for a second, not when you were this close, smiling and laughing. You made him feel… good. Warm. Made him forget where he was for a second. It was dangerous and stupid, but he still didn’t take his eyes off you.
He moved closer under the guise of keeping you warm, but he noticed the way you hid your face from him. He always noticed. He wasnt game enough to think you wanted him like that, but he knew he had some kind of effect on you. You didn’t want him, but you needed him. He kept you safe, and he thinks that after all this time you, for some god damn reason, cared about him.
He couldn’t tell you why. He was a dick to you ever since he found you. Sure, he’d pulled you out of the snow and warmed you up for three days. Fed you boiled soup and water and made sure you didn’t choke, but he made sure you paid for it when you woke up. He was colder than the snow outside, sometimes straight up ignoring you when you asked him dumb questions.
He felt guilty now, thinking back, but he was in a bad place. It was dark without you, but since you’d wormed your way into his heart, he could hardly remember what it was like not to have you around. He sure wouldn’t be crammed on a rock watching bears roll around in snow, but he couldn’t think of another place he’d want to be.
“You’re still cold.” Joel says after a while, noticing the way your hands clench and unclench under your gloves. It’s something you’ve done to warm up your fingertips since he’d found you. Your hands get cold first.
“No, I’m not.” You say, eyelashes fluttering rapidly to blink away the fallen snow. “Okay, I am. But where are you gonna see something like this again?!”
“The woods. Where we are gonna walk through for the next two days.” Joel says, and though you stop smiling, you finally turn to look at him. You shake your head, rolling your eyes.
“You cannot tell me that is not the fucking cutest thing you have ever seen. They are rolling around in little balls, Joel. Tiny bears rolling around in the snow!” Your hand grabs his jacket, and he freezes up. You’ve touched him only a few times— times he thinks of far too often, but it still makes him feel like a deer in the damn headlights.
“It’s adorable. Can we move now?” You roll your eyes again, but for some reason you always smile at him after. Like he’s funny or something.
“Fine, but you’re missing out, cowboy.”
“I’m not a cowboy.” He says between huffs as he drags himself upright. He offers you a hand, brushing off the snow from his jacket with the other. You take it, and a rush of heat nearly melts the snow on his head.
“You wore that hat. You’re a cowboy.”
“I wore that one time.” He reminds you to no avail, and you laugh, walking in line next to him.
“It looked good! I think you should lean into it. You got the whole accent going on, and the chivalry act. It’s a winner!” You tuck your arms into the straps of your backpack, your shoulders brushing his. He doesn’t move away.
“Chivalry, huh?”
“You did save my life. Multiple times. And taught me how to shoot a gun.” He scoffs. You thought that was chivalry? Fuck, if only you knew how he’d really treat a woman— how he’d treat you if you aren’t stuck out in these woods.
“Yeah, perfect first date. Learn how to shoot a rusty old rifle.” Joel jokes, and then feels you stop, boots crunching in the snow.
“That was a date?” Wide eyed, you stare up at him, the space between you feeling further than ever and way too close.
“What… I didn’t mean it like—“Joel sighs, taking a step forward. “Thats not what I meant.”
“Oh. Yeah, I knew that.” You shake your head, snow falling off your beanie. It nearly comes loose, and when you walk up next to him, Joel moves before he can think.
He can’t stand that little look in your eye, the one he used to see all the time. It was hurt— hurt caused by him. You’d had enough of that in your life. Joel wasn’t going to be the cause of it anymore. Not when you were the woman he— the woman he cared about.
His hands tug lightly on the sides of your beanie, and you still under him. Your eyes watch him cautiously as he adjusts it on your head and over your ears, and then lets his hands linger. They wander down, still gloved, along your cheeks, wiping away the snowflakes resting on your cheeks. He takes in a breath, and his chest touches yours. When you smile softly, he feels sucker punched, and his hands slowly fall from your face.
“I didn’t mean that.” Joel says in the same low tone he uses when you talk at night, like it’s a secret.
“The date, or the backtracking?” You were still smiling, and it cut Joel up like a blunt knife was searing into his heart. You were fucking painful, but he yearned for it.
“The… both. That— at the time, that wasn’t a date. But that’s not sayin’ I wouldn’t take you on one.” Your face was full of surprise— eyebrows raised and mouth agape. “One with less guns.”
“Joel…” You breathe, and he wishes he kept his hands on your face.
He lets the confession sit, unsure of what to do with himself now he’s put it out there. He’s got two days alone with you in these woods before you reach Tommy, and he’s fucked if he’s gotta deal with your rejection—
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you with less guns.” You say, clearing the distance between you and him in three bounding steps. “I’m excited to see what you come up with, then.”
“You, uh—“
“Though I am expecting you to break out the hat. I want the full experience.” He can hear the smile in your voice, his head dropping down so you can’t see his matching one.
“I’ll make sure I do that, darlin’.” Your breath hitches, and it’s your turn to hide from him.
You both keep walking, though Joel feels himself pressing closer and closer. His heart is racing, and he’s half worried he’s going to pass out, his vision a little blurry. Did he just ask you out? He feels like he missed it. Just blacked out and someone else took over. Not just that, but he thinks you might have just said yes.
“You do look good in that hat. I was serious.” You admit, staring at your boots. Joel feels his face get hot, unfamiliar territory making his hands shake.
“You’re insane.” He manages, and links his hand with yours.
“Whatever you say, cowboy.”
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starlightwritcr · 9 months ago
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android gojo headcanons
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ok wow this was longer than i thought. i hope you guys enjoy
android sukuna version
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You were a beta tester for Jujutsu Technology. Your job description was quite straightforward. You just acted like a customer who bought the product you were testing and gave feedback based on what you experienced.
This time, your employers wanted you to test out the newest of the Gojo line, the S4T0RU model. He was an android for a myriad of purposes. The engineers must've been quite proud of themselves for coming up with him.
He was the strongest and most durable out of all the androids they've come up with, possibly even surpassing the SUKUN4 model. Not only that, but he came with Jujutsu Technology's best intelligence chip, their most advanced one to date. He could learn at speeds no human could match.
He could protect his owner from any and all harm, he assists with all your chores with peak efficiency, he can tutor your children, help out with homework, he could provide companionship... and other more "adult" things.
In short, he's the jack of all trades for androids. There was a reason he cost the highest out of all of them.
For this simulation, you were meant to act as a single mother who recently lost her husband and needs assistance with her two children. The two children were androids created for testing, since it was too risky to use actual children in the process.
It started with unboxing him, the same way any buyer would. So far, you encountered no issues. Setup just required you to log into the app and configure the mode you need him for. Options included: Fighter mode, Caretaker mode, and... Pleasure mode. You clicked on "Caretaker mode".
When he woke up from his slumber, he greeted you and your children. Megumi didn't take too well to him, but Tsumiki quite liked him. You noted that his voice module was fully operational, no glitching or echoing. This version of him was still a prototype so his personality was a bit blank for the time being. It'd likely only start developing after spending time with you and the kids.
Your theory was proven right when you put the S4T0RU android to the test, asking him to do basic chores like vacuuming the floor and cleaning up the kids' toys. Tsumiki showered him in praises, which he basked in, wearing a smug smirk as he showed off his prowess.
You couldn't help the amused smile as you watched him pick up the sofa with one hand to vacuum, even though he could've just moved it to the side to achieve the same results. An android that was a showoff. How interesting.
Next task was to test his skill in teaching, asking him to help homeschool Megumi. It would prove to be a little more difficult than the basic house chores. This was especially the case with Megumi's model, who was designed to simulate a more... difficult and moody child. Androids who couldn't handle him usually didn't make the cut and got scrapped.
Despite Satoru's initial rocky start with him, he eventually got the hang of it and figured out how to get the child android to listen.
The more you spent time with him, the more attached you felt to the android. Out of all the androids, he seemed the most... lovable.
You weren't part of the Pleasure Department so you didn't have the most experience regarding the more... sensual androids.
But you couldn't quite recall whether the previous androids you tested were as... touchy as Satoru was. You never seemed to go a day where he hasn't had his large arms wrapped around your waist or shoulder.
While assisting you with chores, he made conversation, asking you about your interests and hobbies. He listened intently, hanging onto every word of your responses.
Whenever you got back home from "work", you'd find him playing with the kids, either having tea parties with Tsumiki or watching animal documentaries with Megumi. Upon noticing your arrival, his eyes light up with excitement. He rushes to your side, eager to help you relax after a long day.
He'd make you a cup of your favorite drink, making you sigh with relief. Every task you've made him do was a success. He should be good to go now. All you had to do was give him clearance to be mass produced and sold to the public.
As you rested your head on his shoulder, hearing the gentle hum of his system, you felt a twinge of pain, knowing that the life you've grown so attached to will eventually come to an end - that this fabricated life you've built with him would be gone in just a few days.
"Do you have to let me go?" Satoru's question made your heart stop. There was not a single android who has gained awareness of the simulation. But somehow, he acted like this was a fact he understood since long ago.
You let out a shaky breath. "I... have no choice. This is what they pay me for. You'll be taken from me regardless."
He gave you a chesire smile. "Their first mistake was giving me the tools to bust us out of here."
Satoru disconnected his system from the Jujutsu Network and grabbed the two kids, doing the same to them. Alarms started blaring, alerting all the workers that an android had gone rogue.
He picked the three of you up, breaking out of the compound.
You weren't quite sure what the future had in store for you. But you were sure that you'd be fine as long as you had Satoru and your newfound family by your side.
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hamsterclaw · 11 months ago
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Bangtan Christmas 2023 drabble 2 - read the rest here.
In a post-nuclear war world, all you have is your son Jiwon. You'd do anything to keep him safe, including putting your trust in your new neighbour Kim Namjoon. You hope you haven't made the biggest mistake of your life.
Pairing: Namjoon x f! reader
Rating: 18+
Genre: Dystopian future AU, smut, single mother reader
Warnings: Sex, swearing, violence
Word count: 7.5k
With thanks to @vyduan for helping me work out the kinks (heh) in this story. Love you, Vy.
Author note: Written in response to an ask I got early in the year - a story I've kept chipping away at and now it's finally finished. Anon, I think about you often and I hope you and your kids are doing well. I hope you've had time to heal and no longer think of yourself as a heartbroken single mom, because you are and have always been more than that.
Your breath comes out in puffs of white as you carry an armful of logs to the furnace powering your greenhouse.
Inside, the air is humid, warm, perfect for the vegetables you’re carefully cultivating. Outside, the cold of a perennial winter’s seeped into your bones.
Nothing grows outside, not since the Great War. 
You wonder why they call it ‘great’ when everything is worse now than it was before the war.
You’re emerging from the greenhouse, wiping your hands on a soiled rag, when you hear your new neighbour singing softly.
He’s got a melodious voice with a gorgeous husky tone. You smile to yourself as he sings a tune you know.
Suddenly he stops. ‘Oh shit!’
There’s a clatter of metal against worksurface, the unmistakeable sound of breakage.
You walk up to the wire fence and call out. ‘Need a hand?’
There’s another clatter, then the door to the greenhouse opens and you meet your new neighbour face to face for the first time.
He’s tall, broad shouldered, with a face that makes you wish you’d bothered to comb your hair before you stepped outside this morning.
‘I — uh— heard the noises and just thought I’d check if you were ok,’ you explain.
He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. ‘Do you have a spare pot? I’ll get you a replacement today, but right now my chilli plant is all over my worktable.’
‘Oh,’ you say, quickly turning. You enter your own greenhouse and emerge with one of your own pots.
‘Here,’ you say, holding it out to him. Your fingertips brush as he takes the pot from you, and you hope you don’t look too flustered.
You say, waving a hand, ‘Don’t worry about a replacement.’
‘My chillies and I thank you,’ he says, so solemnly you laugh.
He smiles warmly at you, and dimples appear in his cheeks.
The juxtaposition of his large frame and his delicately pretty dimples is doing something odd to your fickle heart.
You clear your throat. ‘I’m Y/N,’ you say, suddenly feeling shy. 
‘Namjoon,’ he replies. 
You turn as your son Jiwon approaches, rubbing his eyes sleepily.
You pull off your coat and wrap it around him. 
‘Come on, let’s go inside before you get too cold, ok?’
Jiwon, wrapped in your coat, looks curiously at Namjoon.
‘This is my son, Jiwon. Jiwon, this is our new neighbour Namjoon,’ you say.
You put your arm around Jiwon and lead him back to the house.
‘It was nice to meet you,’ you call over your shoulder.
When you look back, Namjoon’s still standing by the fence, looking at you. 
He waves, once, then turns to go back inside.
***
Jiwon regards you over the porridge bowl you’ve made for his breakfast. 
His eyes are serious, too serious considering he’s barely eight. 
You wish there was a way to protect him from the world.
Instead you make sure he eats, and drinks, and wears his warm coat, because the world may be fucked up but your son isn’t going to go without, not on your watch anyway.
You wonder where Jiwon’s father is now but can’t muster up any emotion about it. The burning desire to watch him suffer faded long ago, leaving nothing in its place.
A blank where your perfect life used to be.
You clear away the plates and pull on your coat. 
‘Ready?’
You walk Jiwon to the single room, little more than a shed, where the makeshift school now is, and as you kiss him goodbye and promise him you’ll pick him up later, you wonder whether things will ever change.
It’s been five years since nuclear warfare destroyed the world, four since Jiwon’s father left, and you’re still waiting for life to get better.
Lost in your thoughts, you nearly bump into a uniformed guard.
You bow and apologise profusely.
You can’t see any of the guards’ faces, but you know they make liberal use of their steel batons. 
The pain of a physical beating, though, would pale in comparison to being detained by the intention readers.
You could recover from a beating, but not from being thoughtwiped.
You shiver and resolve to be more careful as you walk the rest of the way to the community gardenhouse to start your work.
***
You glance at your watch and pick up the pace. You’re late to pick up Jiwon. There had been a raid at the gardenhouse just before you were due to leave, and you and the other gardeners had been searched for contraband.
You arrive at the schoolhouse just in time to see Jiwon being questioned by a guard.
Your heart stops, and you hurry forward, already apologising to the three guards standing over your son.
He’s slight, small for his age, and he looks even smaller surrounded by guards.
You step in front of Jiwon, putting your arm out to keep him behind you.
‘I’m sorry,’ you say, bowing low.
The cold steel of a baton nudges under your chin, hard enough to lift your head.
Terror slices through you as the guard stares down at you, but you try your best to keep still.
The other guard says, ‘Hey, Jaebeom. The General wants us back. Let’s go.’
The baton stills, then the guard withdraws it and holsters it.
He turns away without another look at you.
You grasp Jiwon’s hand, and you don’t let go until you’re safely home.
***
The thin light of dawn’s cutting into the horizon when you emerge from your front door.
Snow’s been falling all night, is still falling now, piled up on your short garden path. You lift the shovel off the hook by your door and get to work clearing the path.
This early, the snow’s still icy and hard to shovel away.
You’re breathing hard by the time you get to the gate, arms aching, face damp with sweat.
Your neighbour Namjoon’s front gate swings open and he walks out, wrapped up warm.
He slows down when he sees you but doesn’t stop. 
You give a small smile which he returns before walking off.
You watch him go and wonder what he does to be leaving so early. 
You see Jiwon’s light come on and hurry inside to make breakfast.
***
There’s blood in the snow when you arrive back home with Jiwon at the end of the day, drops of red splattered in a trail to your neighbour’s door.
You herd Jiwon safely inside and your conscience gets the better of you.
You walk next door and knock.
It’s a while before Namjoon answers, but as soon as he does you know you’ve done the right thing coming over.
He looks terrible, pale and wincing in pain. There’s a wound in his shoulder, his chest is bare.
You say, ‘let me help,’ and then he’s stepping back, sitting heavily down on a chair. 
He’s so tall you barely have to lean down to look at his shoulder.
‘Can you stitch?’ he asks, voice tight, body taut.
‘I’ll patch you up,’ you tell him.
You worked in a field hospital during the War.
Namjoon grits his teeth, pale and tense, whilst you patch his wound.
By the time you’ve dressed it, there’s a fine sheen of sweat on his forehead.
You don’t like how pale he is.
‘I have to get back to Jiwon,’ you tell him.
He nods.
Something about the way he slumps back in his seat, quiet and exhausted, makes you say, ‘I can stay overnight to watch you, if you have a spare bed for Jiwon to sleep in?’
Namjoon stares at you for so long you make the decision for him.
‘Come on, let me get you to bed,’ you say.
He staggers as he stands, and automatically you slip an arm around his waist.
He leans heavily on you as you take him to his bedroom and help him onto the bed.
He lays down, eyes already closed. 
You wait until his breathing eases and then you go to get Jiwon.
By the time you get back, Jiwon in tow, Namjoon’s dead asleep.
You make Jiwon comfortable in the adjoining room, hoping Namjoon won’t mind, and set your alarm to check on him periodically.
He sleeps most of the night, waking up once to stumble to the bathroom.
You get up to check on him. ‘Are you all right, Namjoon?’
Thankfully your presence doesn’t seem to alarm him. 
‘I’m fine,’ he says, but you can see the sheen of sweat across his forehead.
You fetch a glass of water and some pain meds from his kitchen. He’s still awake when you knock on his door.
He gulps the water and swallows down the medicine gratefully and lays back. 
There’s something about the irregular rhythm of his breathing that makes you offer your hand.
‘The meds will kick in soon,’ you promise him. You squeeze his hand gently. 
He murmurs a thank you. When his breathing evens out and the grip of his hand eases, you pull the blanket over his chest and make your way back to the other room where Jiwon is.
It’s sometime just before dawn when you wake. Namjoon’s extra bedroom has a pretty view of his backyard, his greenhouse. The rolling hills in the distance are bare in the winter cold, starkly beautiful.
For the first time in a long time, you wonder where Jiwon’s father is, how he’s doing. If he ever thinks of Jiwon, or you. Beside you, Jiwon stirs. 
‘Mama?’ 
‘Yes, baby?’
‘I’m not a baby,’ Jiwon says indignantly.
‘Ssssh, you’ll wake Namjoon up. Are you hungry?’
Jiwon yawns a little. People have always said he doesn’t look like you or his dad, but in moments like this you can see yourself in him.
‘Come on. Let’s go home and I’ll make breakfast, ok?’
You check on Namjoon as you pass his room, only to find he’s already dressed.
He stands when he sees you, and you’re reminded of the height difference between you.
You step back. ‘Sorry, I just wanted to make sure —‘
As though he’s aware of how his height and size intimidate you, he stops where he is.
‘I want to thank you for looking after me last night,’ he says. ‘Will you have breakfast with me?’
Jiwon marvels so openly at the sugary cereal Namjoon produces from a cupboard you can’t help but smile.
Single parenthood in a post nuclear war world has been challenging, and you’re scared about how many E numbers it’s taken to produce a cereal this unnaturally bright, but Jiwon’s so excited it’s worth it. 
Namjoon offers you some, and you accept with a smile. He smiles back at you so warmly that you drop your eyes.
Even injured and tired, your neighbour is the kind of handsome man you don’t think would look twice at you normally.
You cover your skittishness by staring down into your cereal as if fascinated.
By the time you gather the courage to look up, Jiwon’s finished his food. 
You’re about to get up to take him home when Namjoon puts out a hand to stop you. ‘Finish your breakfast,’ he says quietly. 
He gets up. ‘Come on, Jiwon, I hurt my shoulder yesterday, can you help me in the greenhouse until your mum finishes her food?’
Jiwon falls into step beside Namjoon so naturally you have no qualms about letting them go together. There’s a funny lump in your throat as you watch them walking together through the kitchen window. 
You tell yourself sternly to keep it together and not to assign a romantic narrative to your handsome neighbour who’s clearly just repaying your kindness from yesterday. 
By the time Namjoon and Jiwon get back, you’ve finished your breakfast and washed up. The kitchen looks like you and Jiwon were never there.
‘Thank you,’ Namjoon says. ‘For looking after me yesterday.’
‘It was no bother at all,’ you tell him, sincerely. ‘Thank you for breakfast.’
You nod to his chest. ‘You should get the wound checked out at the clinic today.’
‘I will,’ Namjoon promises. He waves goodbye to Jiwon and you, standing on his doorstep until you’ve rounded the fence to your side.
***
You’re walking with Jiwon back from school when you realise there’s someone waiting at your door. You can’t see clearly in the evening light, and you tuck Jiwon closer into your side as you approach.
You call a greeting, and a moment later the person steps into the light and you realise it’s Namjoon.
‘Hi,’ you say, unable to hide your relief.
‘Hi,’ he replies, ‘I didn’t mean to scare you. I was just by the river and I passed a cart selling these and I thought Jiwon might like them.’
He holds out a paper wrapped bundle of bungeoppang, still warm despite the cold.
Jiwon’s reached out, already thanking him, and you look up at Namjoon.
‘Thank you, that’s very kind of you, they’re his favourite.’
‘There’s enough for both of you,’ Namjoon says.
He’s stepping away, halfway down your yard when he stops. 
‘Your gate lock’s broken,’ he says. ‘I can help you fix it if you want.’
‘Don’t trouble yourself,’ you say hastily. The lock’s been broken for a while, you’d meant to fix it but it’s been a busy month at the communal greenhouse.
‘It’s not safe,’ he says gently. ‘Not with both of you in the house.’
His words, though gently spoken, send a flush of shame through you.
He must think you’re such a mess, incapable of even keeping yourself and your son safe. 
He doesn’t give you time to answer. ‘I have tools. I’ll come over tomorrow and fix it, ok?’
‘Thank you,’ you say. There’s a quiver in your voice, you hope he doesn’t know you well enough to hear it. 
You open your door and usher Jiwon in from the cold.
***
You’re clearing your garden path the next morning, shovelling snow, when Namjoon comes to fix the gate. 
He nods politely at you, then gets to work. He doesn’t seem to want to chat, particularly, but that’s fine with you as you’re out of breath from clearing the path anyway. 
Namjoon disappears briefly once the lock’s fixed, comes back with a bag of grit over his shoulder. 
‘Let me grit your path,’ he offers, and you let him as he’s already brought the damn stuff over.
You invite him in as you prepare Jiwon’s breakfast.
He sits at your table, looking big in your small kitchen but not out of place.
There’s a picture on the wall of you and Jiwon’s father, from the Christmas that Jiwon turned two.
You can see him looking at it as you pass him a mug.
Namjoon asks, ‘Is that Jiwon’s father?’
You look at the photo. In it, you’re holding Jiwon up, and Hiro, Jiwon’s father, is laid on the floor, tickling his feet. There are the trappings of what Christmas was like before the war scattered all around you.
Luxuries that weren’t until everything else was taken away. 
‘Yes,’ you say. You lean against the kitchen sink, hold up your own mug. ‘He left after the war.’
‘I’m sorry.’ 
He looks like he means it. 
‘It’s ok,’ you tell him, honestly. ‘We’re doing ok, and Jiwon doesn’t remember much of him.’
There’s a moment of silence, then you hear Jiwon’s footsteps coming down the stairs. 
He greets Namjoon with a total lack of surprise at seeing him at the breakfast table. You’re amused at the nonchalant way Jiwon greets Namjoon, and then you realise it might be because of Namjoon’s calm, gentle manner.
For all his size, you find it difficult to envision Namjoon ever hurting anyone or anything. 
***
The guards come for you a few weeks later, late at night when Jiwon’s asleep. You’re putting away the washing up when there’s a knocking at the door.
Impatient, demanding.
You crack the door open only to have to step back quickly as the door is pushed inward, towards you.
The two guards who enter have epaulets on their shoulders signifying them as of a low rank. 
Any rank can detain a civilian for thoughtwiping, though.
The chill in your spine is only partially environmental.
‘Are you the wife of Hiro Kwon?’ 
You keep your tone calm, steady. ‘We’re estranged. I haven’t seen him in years.’
‘We have reason to believe he stole a very important pre-war relic from General Dei.’
You know where this is going.
‘My son is sleeping upstairs, can I take him into the greenhouse whilst you search my house?’
The guard closest to you gives you a hard stare. 
‘He has nightmares,’ you say, pleading. 
You fetch Jiwon, get him dressed and take him outside whilst the guards search your house. He leans against you, quiet. You hate that events like this are a part of his life.
Next door, Namjoon’s light is on. 
When the guards come out to tell you that you can re-enter your own house, you hear Namjoon’s door opening.
He walks up to the fence, and your heart stops.
He’s wearing full guard uniform, with epaulets that show he outranks the guards questioning you.
Sweet, gentle Namjoon from next door is a high-ranking official in the guard.
And you? You’re the biggest fool alive.
He’s looking at you and Jiwon, face impassive, a muscle in his jaw ticking as he takes you in.
Beside you, Jiwon’s shivering, and automatically, you slip your coat off to wrap around him.
You turn back to the guards. You’re still struggling with the weight of recent revelations but you need to get Jiwon back inside.
‘May we go?’ 
The guard stops you, drawing his baton, and you freeze.
‘He can go. We have more questions for you.’
You can’t look at Namjoon.
‘Of course. Let me take him up to bed and I’ll answer any questions you have.’
The walk back downstairs after you put Jiwon to bed feels like your feet are too heavy for your body.
You cast an eye at the mirror in your hallway. Your expression is a perfect blank, unreadable. You already know the lengths you’ll go to, to keep Jiwon safe.
The questions start innocently enough.
When did you last see your husband?
When did he last try to contact you?
You’re asked differently worded versions of the same questions repeatedly.
Your answers get shorter as the questioning goes on, and then the baton comes out even though you haven’t moved.
It raps on the table next to your hand, and you can’t help it, you startle badly at the sound.
There’s a knock at the door, then.
You look to the guards, and the younger one gets up to answer.
He returns with Namjoon. 
Namjoon’s face is impassive. He gives you a once over, then nods to the two guards. 
‘Leave us, I’ll handle this.’ 
The tension in the room ramps up as the guards leave, and by the time the door closes behind them, it’s taking all your strength to stay still. 
Namjoon, as though sensing your turmoil, takes a step back, away from you. 
His voice is low, quiet, but you have no difficulty hearing him. 
‘Did they hurt you?’ he asks. 
You look up at him, trying to read his expression. ‘No, they didn’t,’ you answer. 
He lets out a breath that sounds relieved.
‘Have you heard from your husband?’ he asks.
‘I told you, we’re estranged,’ you reply.
You can hear Jiwon moving upstairs. You turn back to Namjoon.
‘Can I go to him? I’ll come back down, I just want to make sure he’s ok —-‘
Namjoon’s expression changes. He looks stunned. 
‘Of course, I wouldn’t stop you.’
When you come back down Namjoon’s still standing where you left him.
‘It’s late, you should go to bed,’ he says. His eyes search yours.
You look back at him, at the epaulets adorning his broad shoulders.
He must have earned them somehow. 
The thought makes you avert your eyes, set your chin.
‘I will,’ you say, neutral, cool. 
Namjoon waits like he’s got more to say, but when you look up, he’s headed to your kitchen door, letting himself out.
You lock the door behind him and breathe out, fully, for the first time in hours.
***
You wake the next morning to sounds outside your window.
There’s a man in your garden, and you’d be alarmed if Jiwon didn’t have a similar profile.
It’s Hiro.
You open the back door and gesture him in.
He looks older, thinner, but he still has the spark in his eye that drew you to him. You’re surprised to find you don’t feel anything about his sudden appearance apart from the faintest pleasure of seeing someone who was once dear to you.
You moved on out of necessity, and there’s no going back.
‘The guards are looking for you,’ you say, once you’ve made him a drink.
‘I know,’ he says. ‘I need somewhere to stay. Do you have any money?’
‘Not much,’ you tell him. ‘I can spare some.’
Hiro touches your hand, on the table in between you, and you pull back, startled.
You get up, gather the banknotes you’ve saved, and give him what you can.
‘Can I see him?’ Hiro asks.
You don’t have it in your heart to say no. ‘Don’t wake him.’
You take him upstairs to Jiwon’s room, let him peer through the crack in the door.
When Hiro turns back to you, there are tears in his eyes.
You have nothing left to say.
***
The raid on the communal greenhouse today was unexpected, and you weren’t quite quick enough to get out of the way of a wayward baton strike.
Your wrist throbs dully, your fingers are swollen, and the painkillers you dry-swallowed are only just about taking the edge off. 
You’ve sent Jiwon to bed and are trying to dislodge the sack of fertiliser from the top shelf of your greenhouse one-handed, panting at the effort, when Namjoon’s porch light comes on.
Startled, you lose your balance and fall off the crate you’re balancing on, just about managing to protect your wrist as you land.
The noise you’ve made draws Namjoon to the fence.
Thankfully, he’s not wearing his guard uniform.
When he sees you on the ground he disappears, appearing a moment later on your side of the fence, breathing hard from rushing over.
‘Are you ok?’ he asks, helping you up.
You’re about to answer when his face darkens. ‘What happened to your hand?’
Your hiss of pain when he reaches for you makes him flinch.
‘Here,’ he says. 
He cups a hand under your elbow gently, helping you back into your kitchen.
He frowns even more when he sees how swollen your wrist is.
‘We need to get you to a clinic,’ he says.
‘I can’t leave Jiwon, I’ll go in the morning,’ you tell him.
‘You can’t leave this overnight,’ Namjoon insists. 
He runs a hand over his face. ‘I’ll call my friend.’
‘I’m fine —‘
‘You aren’t,’ Namjoon says, the shortest he’s ever been with you. ‘I have a friend who’s a nurse, I’ll call him.’
You sit quietly in your kitchen as he makes the call. 
‘Jimin will be here soon,’ he tells you when he returns.
You’re too on edge to ask about Jimin.
You want to tell him that you’re fine, but when you open your mouth, you say, ‘Hiro, my ex husband, came here yesterday asking for money.’
Namjoon considers this in silence.
‘If the guards find out —-‘
‘I’m sure as hell not going to tell them,’ Namjoon says, sharp. ‘And neither should you.’
‘You’re a guard,’ you point out. 
‘And you told me because you know I’m not like them,’ Namjoon says. His voice is neutral, without inflection. 
‘I told you because I don’t want you to get into trouble because of your association with me. Especially after they came looking for Hiro,’ you argue. 
You get up. ‘And yes, because you aren’t like them.’ 
As soon as you say the words you realise they’re true. 
On some level you know, from the sides of him he’s shown to you, that Namjoon isn’t like the guards you’ve seen. 
Namjoon rubs his eyes. He looks tired. 
‘My father was a commander in the first generation of guards,’ he tells you. There’s a note of bitterness in his voice. ‘That didn’t save me from being thoughtwiped.’ 
You stare at him in shock. 
‘I have all the right decorations,’ Namjoon continues, gesturing to his shoulders. 
He meets your gaze. ‘I can’t excuse the things I’ve done in the past to earn them. I was young, eager to please my father, eager to keep my mother safe, and there’s nothing safer than being a guard.’
There’s bitterness in his voice now.
‘I had my limit though, as warped as I was, and I protested against an order I was commanded to carry out.’ He pauses. ‘I couldn’t do it.’
‘Your past is a fog once you’ve been thoughtwiped, but it comes back slowly, in flashes. Like a puzzle that’s incomplete.’
You’re so caught up in Namjoon’s story you’ve forgotten about the pain in your wrist.
‘This isn’t about me but I told you this because I want you to trust me,’ Namjoon says. He touches your arm, gentle. ‘There’s no threat to you, from me.’
You believe him.
You’re about to say so when there’s a knock at your door.
Namjoon gets up and returns with a man with kind eyes who introduces himself as Jimin.
He tends to your wrist with a gentleness that almost brings you to tears, binding it and placing it in a brace that eases the pain a little.
‘It’s probably broken,’ Jimin tells you, ‘but this is the best I can do until you can get to the clinic.’
You thank him gratefully. 
‘Namjoon says you have a son. If you bring him to my clinic I’ll do a health check for free,’ Jimin offers.
You can’t thank him enough for his kindness.
After he leaves, Namjoon says, ‘Do you have a spare room? Or I can sleep on the couch.’
You stare at him, overwhelmed. ‘I don’t have a spare room —-‘
‘The couch it is,’ Namjoon says. 
‘You don’t have to —‘
‘You did it for me when I was injured,’ Namjoon points out. He dimples at you. ‘Don’t let me miss my chance to play nursemaid….’
You can’t imagine anyone who looks less like a nursemaid than your tall, broad, handsome neighbour.
‘You can take my bed,’ you offer.
There’s a beat of silence, and you realise how it must have sounded to him.
Oh no.
You splutter in your haste to explain. ‘Oh my god, I meant you can take my bed, for you, alone. I can take the couch.’
Namjoon looks like he’s holding back a smile.
‘I’ll take the couch,’ he says, very gently. ‘Now you should go to bed, you look very tired.’
You take yourself off to bed before your mouth betrays you again.
***
You wake to familiar scraping outside. You get up, hissing at the dull flare of pain in your injured wrist, and head for your bedroom window.
It’s Namjoon, clearing your garden path. He pauses to wipe a hand over his forehead, breath coming out in white puffs.
You pull on a robe and head down to the kitchen, open the back door.
‘Hey,’ you call.
He turns immediately, face creasing in concern. ‘How’s your wrist?’
‘Still broken,’ you say cheerfully.
A dimple flashes in his cheek.
‘Go sit down, I’ll finish this and make us breakfast.’
Despite Namjoon’s instructions, you start on breakfast anyway, you’re used to looking after you and Jiwon.
‘I’ll walk Jiwon to school so you can go straight to the clinic,’ Namjoon says.
You look at Jiwon.
Jiwon’s bright smile is all the answer you need.
***
You wake in the dead of night, heart thumping, blood rushing in your ears.
You’re up and out of bed before you’re fully awake, hand on Jiwon’s door, when you hear it again.
The same noise that woke you up.
The creak of your front gate.
You hear footsteps to your front door, then the knocking starts.
You wake Jiwon, wrap him in his coat, wishing you’d remembered your own.
‘Open the door, by the order of the guard,’ shouts a male voice, making you stumble in fear, making your adrenaline surge.
You glimpse the grandfather clock on your landing as you hurry through to the kitchen with Jiwon.
It’s 2am.
You doubt this is a routine interrogation.
It feels more like a raid.
You grab Jiwon’s face, make him look at you.
‘If we get separated, run through the gate and into Namjoon’s greenhouse. Don’t wait for me.’
Your voice is calm, your eyes serious, and Jiwon, with the wisdom of a much older child, nods.
You pull his coat closed, and take a breath, gathering your wits about you before you pull open the back door.
There’s no one there. The guards are still at the front of the house.
You hold Jiwon’s hand, tight, and step into the night.
***
You make it into Namjoon’s greenhouse just as your kitchen lights come on.
Your heart pounds like drums in your chest, insistent, so loud you’re worried anyone within a half mile could hear it.
You tuck Jiwon into a corner between sacks of fertiliser, stacked up, and listen intently.
There’s shouting, the sounds of doors slamming.
You hope it’s snowing hard enough to cover the tracks you and Jiwon made.
There’s nothing you can do about it now.
You wait, Jiwon tucked as far back as you could put him, hands gripping the shovel you grabbed from the back of the door. 
Beams of light bounce over the glass wall, freezing you into position. You close your eyes.
The door creaks open, and you stop breathing.
Steps, then in your terror it takes you a while to recognise Namjoon’s face.
Your eyes meet.
Namjoon holds up a hand, the barest of movements, then he shouts, loud and clear, ‘They’re not in here.’
Your heart pumps, and you start to breathe again. 
***
It’s hours before Namjoon returns to the greenhouse, face drawn and tired.
He says, ‘We need to go.’
‘Where?’ you ask, when you’re really thinking, ‘We?’
‘I’ll tell you on the way.’
Namjoon scoops Jiwon into his arms like he weighs nothing, and you follow.
Your limbs are stiff from the cold and the tension of waiting to be caught, but you make them bend to your will, keeping up with Namjoon’s longer strides.
‘I’ve got a car, a mile from here, can you walk?’ Namjoon asks, terse.
You notice the backpack he has slung onto his shoulders. 
‘I can carry something,’ you say, ‘Give me the pack.’
Namjoon’s tense expression softens, just enough to be perceived, as he glances at you.
‘Keep pace with me,’ he says.
It takes you a quarter of an hour to reach the car, parked alongside a warehouse. 
Namjoon places Jiwon in the backseat, tucks a blanket over him, unlocks the trunk to place the backpack inside.
You climb into the front passenger seat, watch as he starts the engine. His hand curls around the gear shaft, and you put your hand over his. 
‘Are you sure you want to do this?’ you ask.
There’s no going back from this. It’s one thing to not report you to the Guard, it’s completely another to help you get away.
Namjoon looks at your hand on his for a moment.
‘I haven’t felt this strongly about anything in a while,’ he says.
He looks up at you. ‘This is the only right thing I’ve done in a long time.’
He puts his other hand on top of yours briefly, then pulls away to start the engine.
He drives.
***
Dawn’s breaking by the time you reach your destination, a cabin deep in the mountains that you access via a narrow road buffeted with snow drifts.
Namjoon cuts the engine, sits back, rubbing the back of his neck. He looks tired.
‘Are you ok?’ you ask, tentative. 
‘Better now,’ he says, some of the tension leaving his expression. ‘Better now that we’re here.’
Jiwon’s stirring now that you’ve stopped, looking at you and Namjoon with a quiet resignation.
You hate that he’s grown to accept his world constantly being turned upside down as his due.
Namjoon turns back to look at him, a dimple popping in his cheek as he smiles.
‘Hey, are you hungry, Jiwon? I have some cereal in the cabin.’
Your heart teeters at Namjoon’s easy kindness towards your son, about to fall.
You’re about to fall for this man who you owe so much to, fool that you are.
You put your hand on Namjoon’s arm, eyes alight with gratitude. ‘Thank you,’ you tell him.
Namjoon glances at you, hesitates. 
‘You don’t have to thank me,’ he tells you. ‘I — I wanted to help.’
You think about his words as you help Jiwon out of the car and you head for the cabin together.
***
Jiwon’s asleep, you make sure he’s tucked in warm before you go into the main part of the cabin. 
Namjoon’s standing by the window, his large frame taking up almost all of it, face tilted up, like he’s looking at the sky. 
He turns when he sees you. 
‘I’m sorry,’ he says. ‘I’ll get the generator working tomorrow.’ 
There’s a fire in the hearth, not quite enough to light up the whole cabin but it’s warm enough. 
‘Don’t apologise,’ you tell him. 
You can’t see all of his face in the shadows, so you step forward. 
‘Jiwon and I wouldn’t be safe, here, if it weren’t for you.’ 
‘It was a woman and her son,’ he says, a change of subject so abrupt he’s lost you for a second before he continues. 
‘They wanted me to thoughtwipe her because of something her son did. Something stupid, meaningless.’ 
He turns to look out the window again. ‘I refused.’ 
‘That’s when they thoughtwiped you,’ you say. It’s not a question. 
He laughs, short, harsh. ‘And then they thoughtwiped her anyway. Last I heard she and her son were separated, sent to different sectors.’ 
You step forward again, wanting to see his face. 
‘You’re a good man, Namjoon,’ you tell him. ‘You can’t be responsible for everything.’ 
‘I should have done more,’ he says, flat. 
‘You’ve done a lot for us,’ you point out. 
You still can’t see his face, but you can see the sadness in the line of his shoulders, poignant and beautiful. 
You take another step forward, cup his cheek. His skin’s warm, and there’s the faintest pressure against your palm as he leans into your touch. 
You shiver a little, more from the feel of him than from the cold, but he’s quick to react, slipping the fleece off his broad shoulders and placing it over yours. 
For a moment his arms are around you, and you’re within a breath of turning away, would have turned away if you hadn’t felt the shift in his weight.
He’s leaning on you.
You curl your hand around his neck, and he leans down with the faintest pressure from your fingertips.
A thrill races through you as his lips brush yours, blooming into a pulse, heady and throbbing as you tilt your head to kiss him again.
He’s slow, so gentle it takes you a while to realise that his kisses are robbing you of your breath.
The tip of his tongue flicks at the seam of your lips, a question you answer by parting them.
Letting him in.
His hand travels down your side to land on your hip, tentative.
Another question.
This time you slide your arms around his waist, under his top. The warm skin of his back is smooth under your hands.
He grunts softly as you pull him closer, comes willingly. 
He kisses you again, firmer this time, and you melt into him. 
Gradually, in stages, closer and closer until you’re so close you don’t know where he ends and you begin. 
He cups the back of your head, pulls away just enough to say, ‘The couch.’ 
You follow him to the couch, and he tilts his head for another kiss. 
You put a hand flat on his chest to steady yourself, and he puts his own hand over yours, covering it completely, anchoring you to him. 
‘I haven’t done this in a while,’ you tell him. 
‘Me either,’ he says. 
His dimple flashes. ‘We can remind each other.’ 
Namjoon’s a patient man, you knew this about him already. 
You hadn’t expected him to be quite this patient though, not pushing you even though you can feel how hard he is under you.
‘Do you want to keep going?’ you ask.
‘So badly,’ he tells you, huffing out a breath, tilting his head back. His throat bobs as he swallows, hard.
You lick a stripe along his neck, and he shivers, gripping your shoulder. 
‘Do it again,’ he says, voice dropped low. ‘Can I touch you?’
‘Please,’ you say, and to your delight, his hands drop to the front lapels of your (his) shirt.
‘You look good in my clothes,’ he murmurs. He kisses down your chest, slow, open-mouthed, and by the time he gets to your breasts you’re vibrating with need.
He takes the tip of your breast into his mouth, sucking delicately at first, then more strongly when you moan his name.
Every pull of his mouth makes you pulse and tighten, and you don’t realise you’re grinding against him until his big hand grips your hip.
‘Stop, or I’ll come,’ he warns, voice thick, gravelly now.
‘Take your clothes off,’ you say.
He undoes the fly of his jeans, and the damp patch you see where his cock’s tenting his boxer briefs makes your mouth water.
He stops you with your hands on your own sweatpants, says, ‘Let me.’
Before you realise quite what he’s doing, he’s slid onto his knees on the floor, has tugged your sweatpants down to reveal your thighs, the hot stickiness between your legs.
He hooks a finger in the waistband of your panties. Poises himself, open mouthed over your core.
Looks to you once, eyes hooded, and whatever he sees in your face makes him bend down and put his mouth to you.
You cry out, muffled behind your own hand, and he stops instantly. 
‘Is this ok?’ he asks.
‘Yes, yes, please,’ you tell him.
He watches you as he slides his tongue over your slit, eyes hooded and hot.
He’s good with his tongue, you realise dimly in the back of your mind as he laps at you. He swallows audibly, and your hips dance under his mouth.
‘Joon,’ you moan, and he hums, deep voice vibrating against your skin.
‘Joon,’ you moan again. His hand splays on the curve of your hip, fingers tightening on your flesh.
This time, he moans in response, and you cry out, throaty and hoarse, as he sucks at your clit with renewed fervour, pushing you closer and closer to the edge.
‘Joon!’
He pushes a finger into you, and you come with a gush of wet, walls tightening around him, your entire body tensing for a glorious instant before giving way to waves of pleasure.
Namjoon groans, deep in his chest, and you reach out and grip his hips, guiding him between your legs.
‘Wait,’ he says, touching your face, gentle though you can feel him hard as steel at your entrance, the blunt fullness of his cockhead nudging, seeking. ‘Are you sure you want this?’
‘Yes,’ you say, ‘yes.’
Namjoon groans again, pressing into you, filling you so well your body arches like a bow against his.
‘Feel so good,’ he utters, jaw tight, voice raspy.
He moves strongly within you, taking control with a confidence that thrills you to your toes.
He says your name as he moves, guttural and wanting, the slide of him into you making sparks bloom behind your eyelids.
He grasps your hand, fingers knitting with yours, as you writhe and moan underneath him. 
‘Sound so pretty,’ Namjoon groans. ‘I’m sorry, I can’t —‘
You grip his shoulder. ‘I want you to come, Joon,’ you breathe, mouth by his ear.
He groans again then, circles his hips, and then thrusts deep, spilling his warmth inside you. 
He’s still for a moment, breathing hard against your ear. 
You turn your head to kiss him. 
You’re still holding his hand, and it’s a while before either of you let go. 
***
You pour out a mug of coffee from the pot Namjoon’s brewed, go out to where you can hear Namjoon chopping wood outside. 
He’s concentrating, splitting chunks of wood with a careful precision. 
He looks up as you approach, and his smile warms you. 
‘Hey,’ he says. 
You’d ended up sleeping tangled up with Namjoon. Some time during the night you’d woken to find him pushing your hair back from your face. 
You’d pulled him down on top of you, taken him in again, slow, languid, bodies moving together until you’d gasped and come, muffled against his chest. 
‘Hey,’ you reply. 
‘Jiwon still asleep?’ he asks. 
‘He’s exhausted,’ you say. 
‘Glad we didn’t wake him,’ Namjoon says. 
‘He’s a pretty good sleeper.’ 
Namjoon glances at you, and you flush. 
‘I didn’t mean —’ 
He laughs at how flustered you are. 
‘Good to know he sleeps well,’ Namjoon says. There’s a spark in his eyes now, dimples flashing in his cheeks. 
For all his size and height and seriousness, your handsome neighbour looks like a little boy trying to get a rise out of you when he’s like this. 
He watches, amusement in his face, as you sip the coffee to try to hide your discomfiture. 
When you look back at him, he’s gathering up an armful of wood. 
‘Come on,’ he says. ‘When Jiwon wakes up I need to talk to both of you.’ 
***
The sun’s high in the gloomy sky by the time Jiwon wakes, lured by the smells of breakfast and the warmth of the fire in the fireplace. 
After breakfast, Namjoon clears the table, and then sits you all down. 
‘We can’t stay here for long,’ he says, seriously. ‘The guards don’t know about this place, but it’s not safe, and they’ll still be looking for you.’ 
‘There’s a place close to the border where there’s a new community, away from the guarded sectors.’
You’re looking at Namjoon, carefully, and he’s looking right back at you.
‘We could go there. It’ll be hard, probably, at the beginning.’
You turn to Jiwon.
Hard? 
Harder than the life you have now? 
If there’s one thing you know, it’s that you need to find a better future, for Jiwon. 
Stability. 
You ask the question you asked in your head when you left home with Namjoon.
‘We?’
‘Yes,’ Namjoon says. ‘I’d like to go with you. If that’s ok.’
You’re looking at Jiwon again. 
The hopeful expression on his face makes the decision for you.
***
Ten years later
You’re waiting at the train station for Jiwon.
There’s a chill in the air still, it’s cold for spring but warmer than it has been in recent years.
A lot’s changed in the last ten years.
You, Namjoon and Jiwon had moved to the new community at just the right time.
It had been hard at first, but nothing compared to the constant fear of being detained by the guards.
The world’s been rebuilding itself after the War.
With your experience as a communal gardener, you’d been able to set up your own hydroponic greenhouse, and demand built up for your produce, to the point where you’ve been able to hire your own crew of gardeners and expand.
Jiwon had thrived in the new community, and when universities re-opened, he’d been accepted as part of the first few cohorts of students. 
His university was a few hours away, but the redevelopment of public transport meant there was a regular train linking his campus and your home.
The home you built with Namjoon.
In recent years, you’ve seen more and more of the light-hearted, humorous Namjoon and less of the troubled, serious Namjoon you first met.
Your love for him has only grown.
He approaches you now, a little older, but still as heartbreakingly handsome as the day you met him.
You think the best decision you ever made for you and Jiwon was to let him in. 
And now Jiwon’s on his way back for Christmas, and your heart is full.
Namjoon hands you the coffee he bought you from the cafe, and when you tilt your face up to his he leans down.
It’s a learned response from years of adjusting his height so you can reach to kiss him.
You press a kiss onto his cheek, over his dimple, and his arm slides around you to hold you tight to him.
The train pulls into the station, and Namjoon grasps your hand as it stops.
The carriage doors open, and your beautiful son steps out.
Physically, he looks like you, but the confidence in his bearing, the kindness in his face, the roguish twinkle in his eyes?
That’s you, and Namjoon.  
©hamsterclaw 2023
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