#and i have an event i've already spent too much money on just to attend
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i've formed too many material attachments and that makes it really hard to disappear, even though it feels like everyone is actively trying to ruin my life.
#i'm in the middle of moving#and i have an event i've already spent too much money on just to attend#but i've never wanted to unalive myself as much as i do right now
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this will stop your addiction to scrolling.
do you even realise how long an hour is? 2 hours, 3 hours, and it goes on.
in this post, we will be chatting about all things scrolling. learnings from a book i read, sciences, information from articles, the negative impacts of it, and ways to fix it. grab a snack and a warm cozy drink, because this is gonna take a while! ⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
many times i sit at home thinking that that i "haven't got enough time" to use a whole hour of my day just doing one thing. but then i open my phone, i impulsively go to youtube shorts. "one video" i tell myself. but its never just one video is it? i ended up on my phone for a bit over 1 hour that day. it was disgusting. it made me so mad. i could have spent that time on a hobby, a skill, with my sibling, going for a walk, reading, doing something, anything else! but i didn't. i was so angry i immediately put my phone on airplane mode and switched it off.
see, the thing with scrolling is that you dont even realise how much time has passed! at first it may just be 2:30 but then the next minute you look at it, its already 4pm. and boom. 1.5 hours of time, valuable time has just been gone, evaporated, into thin air. do you not get disgusted of yourself?
the amounts of negatives to scrolling will easily outway any value it brings. whether its youtube, instagram, tik tok, twitter, etc. whatever value or thing you're trying to achieve from these, there will ALWAYS be a better alternative!
this is one of the concepts in the book Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport. it talks about the philosophy behind reducing the time you spend on technologies. see your time as money- say an app charges you by the minute. would you use it as often? you'd probably try to find different ways to getting that same "value" you think your receiving from these addicting apps.
example (for more older people):
you may tell yourself that by being on twitter for hours on end is useful because it can help you get knowledge, news and new connections with people, but that same value you can get- if not more- from just attending monthly or quarterly events, or having a conversation with people, or hand picking a few honest and effective articles to read for a couple minutes each day. as you see, immediately you start to get the same effects you'd be getting from twitter- but more + with much less the amount of time.
or an example from platforms like yt, tiktok, etc.
if it is planned and you've actually told yourself "i have worked very hard, i deserve having a bit of down time to scroll and switch off." , go ahead. (of course there are ways to get that same brain switch off feeling like doodling/ colouring, writing a diary and letting your mind wander, reading a fiction book, taking a bath, etc. but if you've intentionally made this choice, if you truly think this is whats right currently, go for it.)
but lets be real. a lot of the time, its unintentional. even if we have chosen to do it thinking that it is the best thing to do, are you really willing risk hours of your valuable time? "one more video" we ALL say that. its not new. so dont you ever get tired of your excuses? tired having your time thrown away just because you couldn't control yourself? what is that pleasure we get from scrolling?
dopamine.
scrolling activates the brain's reward center by releasing dopamine. every new mini video, like, comment is always keeping us hooked, making us want more and more until it never ends. until its 10pm at night and you're still here. on your phone.
ok so i know i've yapped on a lot. in fact you're probably too lazy and have to less of an attention span to read it all. (yep, also the effect of scrolling.) so,
heres a list of all the harms of scrolling: to enlighten you, not to scare you. (okay maybe a bit to scare you)
lesser attention span. as i mentioned earlier, scrolling reduces your attention span which means it reduces the amount of time you can spend reading, walking, just sitting idle. or you even may not be able to watch a movie without having something on the side like your phone to scroll on! (guilty😬). when that happens, you know something is seriously wrong. if you want to be able to watch a movie without needing all these different distractions, keep reading.
makes you more bored. yeah! i was surprised by this as well ngl!! this also applies to the point about attention span. scrolling can make you feel more bored because all that scrolling, and your brain being super hyper will make you feel bored at the things you used to feel excited by (ex: watching a movie! , reading a book)
increased anxiety and stressed. imagine not being able to stay away from your phone for even a few hours without feeling stressed. thats just so sad but also a truth for many of us. not just that but it can also leave you feeling overwhelmed and hopeless.
sleep disruption. this isn't new. we all know that scrolling late until night not only can affect your sleep schedule/ sleep timings, but also the blue light from your screen stops your brain from making melatonin (a hormone that helps you sleep), which then also affects your sleep. and we know what that can lead to.
on top of all that, it can make you disconnected from real life, nature, increase comparison, harms relationships, productivity and focus and the list goes on.
but you probably don't want to listen to this anymore. you're here because you may be feeling angry. angry at yourself, at your phone, at the internet for taking away so much time that could be spent living a happier life. you have actually felt the harms and now want a change.
[disclaimer: not all of these tips can apply to you depending on your job, your situation, career, relationships, etc etc. take and apply whatever you can.]
tips to stop scrolling (as much):
delete all the social media apps. anything that you scroll on frequently, delete it. this isn't to say that you can't access it at all, you can have it on your laptop or ipad. but the point is that it will increase the friction between you and opening that app.
switch up your feed. this is the very least you can do. start by pressing "not interested" on anything that isn't providing you any actual value. start following people who do provide value. slowly, change your feed to a more positive, motivational page which just makes you feel more inspired/ better every time you leave from it.
set a screen time limit on your phone + set the password as "i failed". this is something i got from online a while ago and its such a good idea! not only will the screen time limit prevent you from further usage, but also setting a password like "i failed" makes you really feel the impact of betrayal to yourself which will make you refrain from doing so!
slowly by slowly, work to reduce the amount of time you scroll everyday.
find the alternative!! okay so now you arent on your phone, aren't scrolling. now what? if you dont already have things that you can do in this immense amount of free time you have, then of course you'd surrender back to scrolling. fill your days with hobbies, new skills, being with other people, with nature, with meaningful and fulfilling activities. "do more things that make you forget to use your phone."
linking back to the earlier point, GET A HOBBY. ngl, it is SAD to only spend your days, vacations, weekends on the damn phone. get off of it! is your life that sad an empty that you have literally nothing better to do then scroll on your phone? thats actually pathetic.
switch off notifications / put on do not disturb- so you dont get constantly reminded
find out why you start in the first place. for me, it used to be an escape to bad things happening in my life/ around me. once you get to the root cause of why you actually start, work back from there. is there away you can remove that trigger from your life? if not, find a different activity that can help you with that trigger.
keep your phone away from your bed. i do this its actually really helpful because it gets me out of bed to have to turn it off which means i dont go back to sleep. also: if you can get a alarm clock which isn't your phone, even better!
things you can do instead of scrolling:
read a book (if its fiction it may be more enjoyable, but its your choice!)
have a shower
set some goals & a to do list for the day
do a puzzle
wordle
try a new skill/ hobby: crochet, guitar, writing
paint/ draw. and stop making thinking it has to be perfect!! if you see it as perfect, it is.
journal / diary writing
hang out with a friend/ someone
cook/ bake
go for a walk or run
learn something new
put a facemask on
listen to a podcast
sleep
yoga/ exercise
write thankyou notes to people
gratitude list
skincare/ a fun grwm of you!
go to a restaurant
style your clothes
make a wishlist
clean out your camera roll
listen to music & just chill
dance
scrap book- phsysical or digitally!
clean/ organize a space
watch a TV show/ movie- WITHOUT your phone.
go swimming
learn about plants so you can start gardening
other things to read:
Psychology behind it, neuroscience, etc.
why you can't stop mindlessly scrolling + tips
BOOK: Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport
reddit
#agirlwithglam🎀✨#social media#scrolling#quit your scrolling addiction#quit scrolling#addiction#it girl energy#self improvement#becoming that girl#girlboss#girlblog#self development#it girl#self love#girlblogging#itgirlism#health#wellness#it girl tips
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Oathbreaker
Pairing: fem!Tav x Enver Gortash, fem!Tav/Astarion
Tags: Emotional Manipulation, Manipulation, Manipulative Relationship, Paladin Tav (Baldur's Gate), Vaginal Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Drunk Sex, Unrequited Love, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Scars, Blood and Injury, Injury, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy, Miscarriage, Torture, Psychological Torture, Implied/Referenced Torture
Word count: 2,087
Ao3 here.
Chapter 1.
Chapter 2.
Chapter 3.
Chapter 4.
Chapter 5.
Chapter 6.
Chapter 7.
Chapter 8.
Chapter 9.
Chapter 10.
Chapter 11.
Chapter 12.
Chapter 13.
Chapter 14.
Chapter 15.
Chapter 16.
Chapter 17. ⬇
Chapter 18.
Notes: I may have rushed to write this chapter - I wanted to play Baldur's Gate 3 tonight -, but I was SO! WAITING! FOR THIS MOMENT AAAAAAAAA IT'S FINALLY HERE-
I've had the last few paragraphs locked away in the depths of my brain for an entire month!!
That one scene in my mind was the reason I've started writing this fanfic. 😂
The plot thickens. It'll be very intense. I'll love it! 😈
Hopefully you will like it, too. Or not. Either way, I love to read your thoughts! 😁🖤
Chapter 18: The Vampire Ascendant
She should've expected that Gortash had plans for that day.
A tailor came over that morning to fit her for a dress that she was pretty sure she never would've put on otherwise. It was a black evening dress, with a way too low cut down her back which was covered with thin lace, and the entire dress was decorated with golden thread embroidery, depicting dragons – very similar to the ones that Gortash had on the collar of his leather coat.
"I'm not putting this on", she protested when the tailor finished and left them alone in one of the audience chambers.
"First of all, I've put hours into the design", Gortash started, and she stared up at him in disbelief.
"You designed it?"
"-secondly, I've paid a lot for it to be made."
"I hate it when you're spending money on me", she motioned towards him, then at the dress. "Can't I just settle for something I can get for myself?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"Just accept it. It's a gift."
"Why are you doing this to me?!" Tav whined, running a hand in her hair.
Five minutes of arguing later, though, she begrudgingly let Gortash chase her into yet another thing she wouldn't've done otherwise. It really was a beautiful dress, she loved it the moment she saw it – she just didn't like that he spent so much on her.
The guest list was unknown to her, but she had to go with him after lunch to check the hall where the ball would be held. The servants were busy preparing everything to be perfect; of course, the main colours were black and gold again, full with – yet unlit – black candles and a way too big space in the middle, with tables near the doors to the balcony. The tables already had some of the drinks on them. Gortash was busy talking to some of those who were responsible for the event itself, and Tav glanced up at the ceiling which was, in fact, beautifully done in colourful glass.
When she stopped in the middle of the room and looked around, seeing that the place would be able to hold a lot of people, noticing the prepared musical instruments in one of the corners, it just occurred to her that there was yet another task Gortash would demand from her that day.
Dance.
Tav paled.
The last time she danced with Wyll came in her mind. She was beyond hopeless, even if she just followed Wyll. Given her past and her training as a Paladin, she had little to no time for such fine arts. Frankly, she didn't even care about it.
That was something Gortash knew by heart by now. He'd spent enough time around nobles and must've attended their stupid parties to know how to move amoung them. But her? She'd be the world's most disappointing dance partner he ever had.
The panic rapidly built in her lower abdomen until she started to feel positively nauseaous. That was when Gortash stopped beside her and glanced up at the glass ceiling, too.
"Beautiful, isn't it?" He asked her quietly. "You should see it during a full moon. The colours are so different then."
Tav's throat went dry. She glanced at him, but he was still enjoying the view, and she just realised that he looked about ten years younger. Observing his face, she noticed just now that her mere presence smoothed out his usual frown.
She cleared her throat and looked back up at the ceiling.
"I'm not dancing."
Her words had a remarkable effect on him. He laughed.
"No?"
"No."
"Well, that's too bad. I'm hosting this event, which means I'll have to do the opening dance."
"I'm afraid you'll have to do it alone", Tav tutted, half turning away.
Gortash grabbed her right hand and pulled her back to himself.
"No", she whispered, "not in front of… everyone…"
"Baldur's Gate's finest men and women will see you with me tonight, anyway."
Shit. Of course, he was right. Tav wanted to run away, but Gortash led her movements as he wished, making her realise that following him wasn't that hard.
As it wasn't hard to follow him in every other thing he did, too.
"See? It's not that hard. You're doing it well", he smiled at her gently, making her heart flutter. "Just follow my lead."
Just follow his lead.
Hours later, on the way to the hall, she kept telling that to herself. Her hand rested on his lower left arm; the gold that covered his arms felt cold to her touch. As grounding as that felt, she'd never been more nervous.
"How are you feeling?" He asked her as they stopped in front of the door.
"I think I'm going to throw up", she admitted.
"You'll have to get used to this", Gortash moved his clawed right hand up to her face. She allowed servants to apply some makeup on her face, as well as tend to her hair, styling it into a decorative bun with several braids at the back of her head, so the back of her dress could be seen. Compared to Gortash's high collar at the back of his head, she looked more approachable, less dominant and less intimidating. Which was probably the whole idea. Gortash hooked his index finger under her chin and brought her closer to himself. "You need to see your subjects."
"I don't like to think of people that way", she murmured.
"That's what they will be. Our obedient puppets." As his clawed thumb ghosted over her lower lip, she faintly remembered that there was someone else who said those words, but his touches were distracting her mind. "Every time I look at you, I can't believe how lucky I am."
That finally made Tav smile.
"You flatter me, Your Grace."
"And you honour me, my dear." He pressed a soft kiss to her lips, and she felt like she'd melt at it. "Come. If you don't want to mingle on your own, just keep smiling and follow me. I'll introduce you to everyone important."
"Just one thing", she murmured before she reached up to his shirt. He frowned slightly when he felt her using the rope to pull it properly closed. "There."
"Was this absolutely necessary?" He raised a brow. "I liked it that way."
"At least have it like this now. We're seeing important people, after all."
"I've had it like that when I became the Archduke."
Tav tilted her head cheekily.
"You looked delicious like that, but I'm afraid if a lot of people are checking you out at that area tonight, I might become a vicious murderer."
"Oh?" He chuckled, moving his left arm around her waist to pull her in close. "I'll have to see that one day."
"Trust me, you don't want to", she warned him quietly, trying to ignore how the air between them changed yet again, positively snizzling with passion they both had to hold back.
"You'll have a long, long night tonight", he warned her, making her sigh.
"…is that the hilt of your dagger or are you just happy to see me?"
"You really need to ask?"
"Enver! Do we need to fetch a glass of cold water for you?"
They kissed, and they laughed in that kiss, feeling light and careless.
Perhaps it was too good to be true.
"Shall we get to it, then?" Tav murmured when they finally could break away from each other. "The sooner the guests leave, the better for both of us." She paused before she giggled again. "And your pants."
"My pants survived a lot more than this."
"Please, Your Grace. Let's go. I want that dance to be over, and it hasn't even started yet."
"Hmmm", Gortash hummed against her lips. "Say that little word again."
"Please, Enver~", she purred as seductively as possible, making him shiver.
"I never get tired of hearing that."
She repositioned herself on his left side, and they finally entered the room. The way every head turned to look at them made her feel like her legs were made of liquid. She'd never, ever do this again. She wouldn't allow him.
She hadn't done anything in particular as Gortash addressed the nobles, just stood tall and as confident as she was able to. She couldn't help the feeling in the pit of her gut that something wasn't right. The men and women around them drank every word of Gortash; they visibly liked him, so there was no problems whatsoever.
Then came the music and the thrice cursed dance.
She struggled through every second of it, even if she was trying her hardest to focus on him and no one else.
"You're doing well", he whispered to her, making her smile as he led her through it.
The tadpole in her skull squirmed anxiously.
This hadn't happened in hours, not since she'd left camp last night. The smile vanished from her face, and her eyes wandered around in the room as Gortash was spinning her once. The faces were blurry as her vision darkened at the pain as the tadpole squirmed even more, causing her a headache – someone was trying to get into her mind.
Close your mind, the Emperor warned her, you are in danger.
The panic was imminent. The Emperor had kept her safe ever since she fell from the Nautiloid, she had no reason not to believe him when he warned her. She felt it anyway; her tadpole wouldn't stir otherwise. She hadn't had her weapons with her, she felt as vulnerable as a newborn, especially in this dress, during a dance. The smile froze on her face as she paled, focusing to shut herself down from the intruder that poked around at the edges of her mind. She was trying to pay more attention to Gortash again, letting him pull her in close as they walked in a half circle, her hands between them, fingers entwined. Her expression made him furrow his brows slightly; he instantly knew something was wrong.
As soon as the dance was over and another song started which most of the guests started to dance to, he led her to one of the tables to get her something to drink. He couldn't outright ask what just happened; not yet, as the night was still young. He couldn't just disappear as they've just arrived. There were customs to follow.
Which led to an agonizing two hours of him introducing her to the good people of Baldur's Gate, during which her tadpole squirmed at the constant attacks against her mind. Someone really wanted to get in and look around in her brain.
Who is it? She asked the Emperor.
If I told you, you would scream.
Well. Good news was that there were several Steel Watchers around the room, and she was hanging from the city's most powerful man's arm. Surely nobody would try anything with the odds heavily in Gortash's favour, right? She was safe as long as she remained on his side and didn't lose him in the crowd.
And seeing her tight lipped, nervous smile and the sheer panic in her eyes, he would've been mad to let her get lost. He didn't only have her right hand hooked around his left arm, he even had his clawed right hand over hers as he spoke to others. To let her know that he really was there for her. To let everyone else know that she belonged to him and if anyone threatened her in any way, he'd destroy them without hesitation.
When it seemed they've met everyone, they glanced at each other. His questioning dark eyes met her slowly calming ones, and he was just about to ask a question when a silky voice spoke from behind them.
A silky voice that made her heart and breath stop.
"Archduke Enver Gortash? We haven't had a chance to speak, yet. I'd like to thank you for inviting me."
Tav nearly fainted. The edges of her vision blurred as she half turned to look at the man who addressed Gortash, dressed in the finest attire she'd ever seen on him; imposing, threatening, scheming in his entire being. Astarion was just as beautiful as he was on the day when he left her; her pale elf with his strong, piercing, crimson eyes and dangerous, sharp smile.
Hello, my sweet. He told her through their psychic connection as he locked eyes with her. Long time no see.
#Oathbreaker#little tyrant [enver gortash]#bg3#baldur's gate 3#bg 3#enver gortash#archduke enver gortash#lord enver gortash#fanfic#Oathbreaker fanfic
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Doomeds.
Pairing: Min Yoongi x f! Reader. Ft. Bts.
Genre: Yandere, dark themes, anguish, suspense.
Summary: ❝We are doomeds, wandering in eternal suffering.❞
Warnings: Yandere behavior, obsession, stalking / stalking on cameras, humiliation, unspecified forced marriage, n*n-c*n explicit sexual relations (on the reader), abuse of power, implicit murder, drug use, kidnapping, hitting, manipulation, dating previous trauma, alcoholism and depression (in Yoongi), accusations of infidelity, dub-con (in Yoongi's case), the reader is in school but is of legal age, death threats, really strange facts. Possibly this would qualify as dark fantasy since everything is so unrealistic.
Number of words: 10,000+
︙Author's note: *sighs* This is the longest fic I've ever written, and I honestly don't know how it turned out because I didn't read it twice like I always do before publishing it. But my beautiful baby helped me correct, I hope you enjoy it and please read the warnings well, I do not want lawsuits. Thanks for being here!
(Sorry for any mistakes, my first language is not English and I am not fluent either.)
Puedes leer este fic y más aquí en español.
If they ever had to ask the reality of events it would be ... Unbelievable. Thinking of how just a simple action changes everything in an already established and perfect environment.
A life.
Your minutes, hours and days were the same under your criteria and eyesight, you study in the mornings, you work in the afternoons and you attend to your homework at night. It was a good routine that used to be repetitive at times, it was fun to follow, even more so in your part-time job.
You could meet many people working in one of the best cafes in the city, your classmate insisted too many times that you work with her saying that could recommend you and you should not even pass a test, they would only accept you for her.
It was a good opportunity and you accepted it with a smile, although she was long gone from work, you were still grateful for the good salary and health insurance that they gave you every month.
"An American coffee with a spoon of sugar and a green tea cake with cream on top." Your mouth and hand move in sync, the client nods silently. You smile, pointing out other details before asking what name you would give the order.
With a sigh, he name came out like a gust of light wind. "Min... Min Yoongi."
You write his name on the screen, the little receipt paper comes out of the machine. You hand it to him by brushing his hand with yours, strangely cold and pale. A chill runs through you but you ignore it, continuing with your work.
"Good Morning _____!" One of the employees greets you kindly, you correspond still concentrated on serving the mysterious stranger's coffee. "Do you have a request for me?"
"Oh, uh... Yeah, this is for table four."
Yun smiles taking the tray with Yoongi's coffee and cake, arriving at his table. The man's expression can be dazzled even under his black mask that covers half of his face, his eyes look for you before colliding with you. YYou refuse to play along, continuing with your work, you had a lot to do and wasting time flirting wouldn't really help you make money.
However, it became pointless trying to ignore him when he kept coming back day after day. Week after week. Tormenting your head, Yoongi was not the first nor the last handsome man you would see coming often, your work establishment was literally in a strategic area and not cheap, you knew that many men and women with money frequented them to drink a coffee or eat some delicacy, even sometimes they only came in to sit for a few hours attending to their affairs over the phone.
It was fine, it was comfortable. You weren't expecting too much, sitting behind a counter, always having to fake a smile despite being tired.
Perhaps it was the constant visits that led you to start a conversation with him. You had about an hour of rest, you prefer to spend those few moments sitting in front of the window of the premises eating any cake that was a few days before expiring to avoid paying for consumption, you felt comfortable in that place that seemed so far from all the other clients.
Until his voice interrupted once, he seemed as calm as ever. His gaze lost from you elsewhere avoiding making contact with you, nervous apparently. His rough and austere tone was changed to a bolder and lower one, asking if he could sit next to you for a few minutes.
"Sure, sit down... he's not busy." It was your answer without having any problem in sharing your place so secret, so comfortable. It was still just as safe even with him present.
And in much the same way, everything became a silent routine. You heeded his order, you took your rest next to him and then you both left at one point. The talks became more common, he being the first to ask about such insignificant things as the rise in the market in the country and how prices should start to rise in coffee as well.
You laughed, you really did it by getting his attention and sharing your reaction.
They both started laughing at how strange it all started, and it was always the perfect anecdote to tell their friends about how they met.
Everything was perfect, like a painting by a great artist, what you would see would be beautiful and cheerful colors, adorning both of you possibly holding hands with a smile and a loving expression from the man who was now your partner. Her pale skin and angelic face represented on beautiful thin paper, presented to the world as a painting that reflected a symbol of love between two souls met in a casual cafe and who wanted each other so much. Too much.
Yoongi was the clear representation of an ethereal person, casual and elegant, polite and kind, protective but not possessive. Simply to the target.
Your routine didn't change much after starting your relationship, you kept walking to your school in the mornings, you attended the cafeteria in the afternoons and you rested at night. Perhaps the only significant thing that you would get out of your boring schedule was your boyfriend's proposal about moving with him to the house of his best friend, almost a brother as he described it, and avoiding paying for your little apartment. You had made one and a thousand excuses, making Yoongi shut them all up.
"Jin is my brother, he would never take advantage of us. I already mentioned the proposal, about you... I have been living there for a few weeks, I assure you that you will be like family."
Family?
Your face relaxed for a few seconds, you had abandoned that feeling and sensation long ago since you moved from your home in your native country. Your mother used to call you every night but little by little that habit was lost, she also had her own problems and being aware of you as if you were a child was ridiculous.
"It's fine." It was your final decision, nervously you moved your hands in the air explaining what you would not accept.
Do not invade your privacy.
You had spent days thinking about how to introduce yourself to them, because apparently there would be more than just Jin, Yoongi and you in that house. Your things were scattered in boxes, you stood in the middle of the almost empty room still nervous about meeting new people and friends of your boyfriend.
That they were now family. Literally family.
The moving truck was parked in front of a large house, it had two stories and an incredibly large garden. More like a forest than an ordinary garden, you got out of the car trying to clean your clothes as much as possible and look presentable. Although it was difficult when your whole body was covered in dust after lifting the boxes.
"I'm not ready, Yoon." You say, containing your anxiety that vibrates to the surface of the skin within you.
Her hand gently brushed your cheek, giving you a bit of reassurance. "You look beautiful, they will accept you anyway." Her lips came up to yours, giving you a quick and soft kiss. "I just remember that I love you, and I know all my brothers will too because you are perfect."
You thanked the little compliment in a whisper, the door of the house opened just after the two of them left, you automatically showed a friendly smile approaching the first person to leave. He was a tall and rather handsome man, he seemed very well dressed to be indoors on a Sunday, more like he was going out to an important business meeting. He looked flawless and elegant.
"The suit was not necessary, Nam!" Shouted your boyfriend behind you mocking, the man laughed showing all the charm of him to your eyes.
"I'm Namjoon, Yoongi's friend. Nice to meet you... _____, right?"
"Yes, it's me. Sorry to see me so disastrous, it was a tiring day with the move."
Namjoon seemed like a very nice and incredibly understanding guy, his presence made you want to meet your boyfriend's other friends. You opened the door entering the house after Yoongi asked you to find your room to start carrying the other things, Namjoon stayed behind to help him, leaving you alone on your unknown route. You walk all over the place and you are surprised that you only walked through the living room, your eyes straying to a noise in the kitchen.
Curious.
You ignore it, continuing your way up, you read every name on the doors. Jin, Namjoon, Yoongi, Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook. All written brilliantly on each different door, you walk a few steps to one that says your name and you thank it with a sigh.
You weren't surprised by how big it was, everything inside that place seemed to be exorbitant and out of the ordinary.
"Oh, it must be you." You are surprised to hear a voice behind you, you turn around in fear before remaining calm. You recognized her face from a photo Yoongi had on her phone.
"Jimin?" You ask with fear of being wrong.
"It's me, it's nice to finally meet you. Jin-hyung said you're moving in a few days, I didn't think it would be so soon." His voice seemed to be calm but there was a hidden question. Why? Why were you there?
You take a few uncomfortable steps back. "It really was, but ... I thought it would be better to do it today that I don't have classes, plus Yoongi doesn't work this day and it seemed like the right thing to do. I'm sorry if bother you."
"No you don't. it's okay, Welcome." With that one simple word he left.
You thought you would have a longer talk with him but you weren't expecting too much, they didn't even know each other and you plan to chat with him like they were old acquaintances. Well, naive.
It seemed strange to you that no one else showed up in the whole house, even when you were uploading the last boxes of the move no one seemed to be a little curious to meet you. Aside from the already friendly Namjoon and the reserved Jimin.
"Yoon" You get his attention, he smiles at you taking the sheets out of your suitcase and making your makeshift bed ready for the night. "Do your friends work today?"
"I guess so, they really don't spend a lot of time together or at home." Explain without noticing your downcast face. You nod, putting the issue aside and concentrating your eyes on arranging your clothes. "Hey... Okay, you can meet them all at dinner today."
Your chest clenches in anguish, "Dinner?!"
"Yes, darling. It's the only time they meet all day, when Jin-hyung cooks for us especially on days like these where we have pleasant surprises."
You purse your lips annoyed, Yoongi smiles kissing your forehead so carefully and lovingly that it melts your senses. The mere presence of him made you want to continue with him forever, you relax for a few seconds hugging his body in silence. They both stay like this, with nothing to say but telling each other everything at the same time.
The thought of ever letting go scares you.
You wait several hours, still sitting in the same place where Yoongi left you. You should be presentable for dinner, you take a quick shower before running to change into a nice comfortable dress, you try not to overdo it but also not show disinterest. From the stairs you hear everyone's mixed voices, chatting animatedly.
"Honey, come here." Yoongi watches you, being the only one to notice that you were peeking in the shadows still unsure of interrupting.
You say hello by walking a few steps until you reach your boyfriend's side, you present yourself the best you can. Everyone falls silent, Namjoon smiles at you just like he did before. Jin interrupts the moment where no one seemed to have anything to say about you, or if he wants to want to introduce himself.
"Today we have a special guest, the dear girlfriend of our brother. I introduce myself, I am Jin the official cook of this family." His body bends down with an exaggeratedly long bow, proud of his words. Jimin rolls his eyes, while his other siblings just choose to tease. "On Yoongi's orders we made her favorite dish, so I don't want any complaints of any kind about the food. I'm looking at you Jungkook."
You are surprised how well everything is going, you feel praised when your favorite food is in front of you. She looked just as elegant, as if you were eating in a five-star restaurant and at a luxurious table with silk tablecloths.
Jungkook still stayed away from the talks, preferring to eat quietly and fiddle with his phone. Hoseok was more animated, asking about you and exaggerating anecdotes that happened with his childhood friends. He moved you that he will still remember all that after years. Namjoon vaguely drew your attention with book recommendations when you commented on your love of reading, Jin quietly continued eating in complete tranquility, Jimin thanked the food and just left.
Taehyung... He seemed interesting to you, he was looking at you all the time with narrowed eyes and when Jimin got up and walked away, he followed closely with a small and almost hidden smile.
You had a strange feeling inside what they called home.
"I-I... I need to use the bathroom." You say goodbye by wiping your lips with a napkin before quickly walking behind them both. Something attracted you to want to know more, as if they were leaving clues knowing that curiosity killed the cat and that you wanted to be the one.
Your steps were quiet, even more so when you tried not to be noticed . You went upstairs listening to their voices whispering and then... An obscene moan was clearly heard, Jimin seemed to laugh in the air.
Your hands shook thinking of opening the door and seeing what was happening. And without knowing it, you had fallen into the same network of attraction as them.
You curse yourself biting your tongue and cheek until they bleed, sure that you were going to make a big and heavy mistake. Minutes later you are going down the stairs back to the table but no one is waiting for you anymore, the table was just as spotless and clean. You are pleasantly surprised to learn that they don't treat you like a guest and that they don't wait too long for you. Maybe they had things to do, however you feel a chill when silence comes.
Where were?
You look around the yard, but no one is outside. Neither in the kitchen and less in the room where you had already walked twice. You catch the sound of drums in your ears rumbling loudly, you close your eyes in a daze for a few seconds until in an instant it goes away, and then everything comes back to itself. You hear their voices upstairs, chatting animatedly for the second time.
"Where were you sweetie? Are you okay?"
You nod still confused. How did they... When was that... You were really fine? You refuse to fall into paranoia and lie down next to Yoongi, as they continue their conversation with each other. Your head keeps spinning with the fresh memories you have, but they seem to disappear second by second and it scares you, you open your eyes without wanting to fall asleep yet but it is as difficult as breathing.
You fall into the dark abyss of sleep, feeling the same chill.
Your gaze is lost in the gray sky, you are cold and your body is swaying. Your eyes move restlessly observing that you are under the snow and a person holds you in his arms through the forest, walking at a slow and safe pace.
It's fine. Are you okay.
Wake up. Yoongi greets you from the door of your now room, you try to regulate your breathing thinking that he would notice your overwhelmed state and he would worry, but no. He is as calm as ever, relaxed even.
"Good morning beautiful, it's time for breakfast. Jin-hyung made your favorite." And with that last sentence she is shifting away, closing the door behind he.
You go down the stairs ready to go, your backpack resting on your shoulder. The table is just as full as at dinner, Jimin seemed very tired trying not to fall asleep, you watch him for a few seconds before looking at Taehyung who ignores you taking his cup of ... Coffee. You approach making him recoil alarmed and disgusted, you check the cup realizing that it is the same recipe that you use in the cafeteria.
Like them?
You look up noticing that, you were uncomfortable, Taehyung takes a few steps away from your body almost leaning against his, still sitting in his chair. You apologize to him making me sigh irritated, still ashamed you apologize again without eating or serving anything, just leaving through the front door.
Your journey is reflective. You forget, dream and recognize, that was the pattern you were following, everything seemed so strange and deep down gloomy, you feel the already casual chill running through your entire body almost like a warning.
Your seat in class was empty waiting, ready for you. Ari greets you, being your table companion and friend.
"Hey, intense night?" She jokes, you look shaking his head. She laughs pointing your neck. "You have... something there."
She frowns even more confused, her face leaves her smile aside and she starts looking at her things until she takes out a small mirror and she hands it to you. You look with horror at a large red bruise painting on your skin, it seemed painful but you had not even noticed or felt it. You touch it still scared and nothing, it doesn't hurt or it seems real.
You take a deep breath before lying with silly chatter, "I had an accident, but I'm fine. I had forgotten I was there, it was nothing serious."
Ari seems worried but in the end she forgets it by returning to the same kind and joking attitude of her, but her gaze drops from second by second to your neck making you cover yourself uncomfortable. Who? It can't be Yoongi, he was always very calm in that regard. You think terrified, your hand goes up to touch it and this time you manage to feel a sharp pain.
You have to cover it with the collar of your shirt so that no customer will notice it and avoid staining the reputation of the cafeteria, you smile nervously taking orders as fast as you can and avoiding looks. Yun greets you like every day, arriving at his work time. You spend hours begging for the clock to advance faster, the night sky appears and the doors close, you clear the last counter before you can finally show your neck again and breathe.
"That's a big problem." Yun whispers looking at the horrible mark, you nod with a sigh giving the same stupid excuse you told Ari. "You should use a little makeup to cover it up, I think it will help you a lot."
You think about it for a few seconds before deciding what you would do. You bow to him with a bow after he offered to close in your place and finish the remaining work for you.
You come home with a smile, you greet Namjoon who is reclining on the couch in the living room watching something on TV. You wait a few seconds but you do not receive a small or accidental look, you approach a few steps to repeat it again but you only get him to get up and go upstairs closing the door of his room apparently with a door slam. What the hell? You think covering your face with your hands looking for some comfort.
Everything was happening inside you, it was like a whirlpool sweeping away your sanity. Were you going crazy? Or you were just thinking a lot about nothing.
You try to draw a picture of your situation, but the only thing that repeats is the constant painting of Yoongi and you together.
"Yoongi!" You say to yourself with a smile, you drop your backpack running towards his room, wanting to see him after such a day.
Your hopes fade like air, everything within the space him screams 'he', but he is not there. You check the safe time that he should be home at that moment. You hear Jin's voice screaming from below about dinner ready, you sigh losing your appetite at those moments.
You lie on your bed checking your cell phone in case there was a message from Yoongi warning about he delay but nothing. You feel empty for some strange reason, but there was nothing different about it now.
If I had been more attentive and conscientious, you would have noticed that two more people other than Yoongi and you were missing from the table. Jin smiles sitting in his same place leaving your plate not caring without you being there with them, his smile never fades even when all his brothers are sitting silently eating and looking at your empty place so intensely that it was terrifying, he squeezes the cutlery in his hand without wanting to break the tradition in his family.
Dinners are sacred and no one should be missing. There will be no discussions or complaints, that's what the rest of the time is for.
That was what her mother said, sitting at the table in her old home containing her anger at seeing her husband so calm after having been unfaithful once more. Not on the table, not on the table.
Not on the table, honey.
Jimin opened the last bottle with a little satisfaction, poured another glass before handing it to his friend who was only glaring at the ground.
"She's not like that... I know her." Repeating the same stupid prayer for hours, Taehyung rolled his eyes trying to calm his annoyance, looking at his other friend insisting that he help him.
"Yoongi-hyung you saw it yourself, she had that... That mark. you didn't do it, maybe Tae is right and she-..."
"Not!" I scream interrupting what to him were lies. "_____ she's my girlfriend, she's not like that. I know her ... she loves me! She loves me! Do you understand?" Says exalted, holding the shirt of his friend who closed his mouth immediately, Jimin noticed that same reflection of anger in him and knew it was better to leave it for now.
Taehyung pushed the drunk Yoongi away from his side, making him release him and repeat the same phrase as in his state, he tried to believe himself.
The door to your room was opened and the smell of alcohol invaded you, making you look disgusted. You closed your eyes without wanting to see him, his body fell to the side of your bed approaching your body so slowly that the anxiety inside you doubled.
"I'm sorry..." He whispered.
His hands rested around you, giving you that warmth so familiar and comfortable in your gray days. A sob was heard while you lost yourself in your own thought, you watch it melt into your arms crying and without wanting to tell you why.
"It hurts." It's the only thing it says. But... Why?
You wake up. Just like a week ago, days had passed and it seemed like your skin kept accumulating horrible marks all over the place. You even went to consult a doctor but he only insisted that something... Or someone did them with such fury that it was incredible that a piece of skin will not be torn off by the force of his suction.
You touched the last mark that came, it was dangerously close to your crotch, you try to hide the others with makeup but they were still visible at a short distance.
You went down the stairs to see them all again, you greet with regret taking the first thing you find. Your mug had your name written on it, it was a rather curious gift from Jin after your melancholic night with Yoongi days ago, he apologized explaining that he felt bad after hearing all the sobs and apologies. For a moment you thought it was something exaggerated but he kept insisting that he felt bad about himself, not with Yoongi who was almost his brother or with you, with him.
You accepted it without wanting to show your dislike for his selfishness and narcissism, thanking him so softly that he hardly heard you.
The special drink that morning was coffee... Americano. You felt insecure to drink it, and you just put it aside.
Same recipe.
Yoongi looked at you for a few seconds before smiling fondly, and you just looked away, leaving him with a confused face as you walk out the door so quickly that he can hardly feel you.
He sighed before being drawn to Jimin's grin-adorned face, he shrugged, hinting at his silent opinion. She is not faithful to you Yoongi, why do you keep waiting for something good? Only looks at her body, her attitude and who she surrounds herself with, it is a classic of womens. You will know that she is a fox hidden under her sheepsuit, just observing her more and you never leave her.
The marks on your body, your cold attitude made him more and more suspicious and fall for Taehyung's profound words. She bit his lip, refusing to spy on your life away from him... Out of his sight.
But he really wasn't doing anything wrong, just observing. In his now dirty head, everything was valid if he could know the truth.
You did the same thing you always told him on his nights where they stayed up talking about his heavy days. You went to school, to work, and then home. Nothing changed your version.
I try to focus on your friends, there was only one girl you spent more time with in your classes and after them. He researched everything about his life, but he had nothing to worry about after learning that he had a boyfriend. He passed your work, standing outside for hours waiting to see you do something dirty or guilty, but you never seemed to move.
You just served the orders and then kindly said goodbye to the customers. He felt guilty for doing something so low to you, until he saw you.
To you.
Your smile grew when one of the workers who was your partner approached your place in the box to whisper something in your ear, you left your place following him towards the warehouse.
Anger consumed him quickly, refusing to continue standing there observing the obvious, possibly he was being irrational and he knew it but the constant insinuations of Jimin. The conversations with Taehyung, his words, his suspicions, the pleased looks from they when he fell back at his feet asking them to tell him what to do with you.
With his damn relationship.
Where were you and him. Not them. You and he.
He opened the door to your room and started going through your things like a degenerate, something must have made him sure that you were cheating on him. Something, a letter, a note, a gift from him, or a simple cheap jewel.
This was your Yoongi? You were clearly looking at another subject.
"Yoon..." You started, his eyes coldly piercing you. He looked different, he was looking at you but you didn't feel safe being so close. "What are you doing?"
"What do you think I do?" He asked how else he will not point to the obvious, for a moment you thought that even if it was, out of respect or dignity, he would try to deny it or find another explanation for his actions so offensive to you. "Where is?"
"Where is what?" You claim, starting to get angry, his eyes leave you again as he continues searching through your drawers, dropping everything to the floor with thudding noises. You get closer trying to push it away but you only get rejection. "Stop it, Yoongi."
"Not until you say so."
You freeze without knowing what he meant by the latter, you take his arm to stop him but you only receive a push that makes you back away this time scared by the force of his attack. "Enough!" You claim this time by making him look at you with his cold eyes. "I don't know what you're talking about and why you're doing this, but enough."
"Then say it..." You shout again that you don't know what he wants you to say, you even curse furiously making him come closer to support your shoulders with his hands bringing you closer to his face. "Say it damn it! Say you're cheating on me with that bastard son of a bitch!"
You feel the pain of his grip, you sob, begging him to release you but are ignored as he continues to ask you to say so. You refuse to lie, especially with something so degrading.
Jin hears the screams as he continues serving the dinner desserts, Jungkook strangely puts aside his phone for a few minutes to thank him with a small toast and a smile that was rarely seen on him.
"The dessert tonight is sweeter than usual."
Jimin raises his glass with a bright smile, Namjoon adjusts his tie tied perfectly around his neck as he sips from his glass, Hoseok laughs eating the delicious cake with enthusiasm.
Curious, a green tea cake with cream on top.
"It's a shame Yoongi-hyung misses out on dessert." Taehyung speaks pretending a pout on his lips, playing with his spoon with the cream on her plate. "It is especially exquisite today."
"Stop playing already, when will you do it? I'm looking forward to getting started." Jin snaps angrily, pushing the cake out of her sight as he drinks from her wine glass.
Jungkook laughs, turning his phone back on to continue playing as usual. "So impatient, hyung." He says he with a click of annoyance.
Jin rolls his eyes, following her gaze to Jimin who is innocently cowering in her chair. Ignoring how completely obsessed Jungkook is with his games, it really was not his business,for something his youngest friend had his parents, who were too busy with their work, they ran the largest electronics factory in the country, leaving his son in the background just giving him everything he asked for without objection. Always showing a smile when little Jungkook came before them demanding a new console or the best phone.
"It only remains to wait..." Whispering, he released a patient Hoseok. His smile as charming as ever. "For her to decide what to do and then... Plot! She fell into the wrong well."
"I hate when you describe and talk like that, but I can't expect much from a Jung... like you."
However, Hoseok never stops smiling even when anger is consuming his mind causing him to clench his fists under the table and bite his tongue inside his mouth, hidden by his gleaming and visible teeth. Namjoon smiles at her, knowing that she managed to provoke him but that she won't do anything to shut him up.
"Pathetic."
Motherfucker.
Jin breaks the tense silence, shushing everyone with a snap. That silence. Nobody hears anything from you or Yoongi, for a moment they feel the anguish that something bad has happened or that his friend has lost a bit ... The hand. But just seconds later you're rushing down, wearing the same clothes and your face covered in tears. You don't even look at them when you run to the door, leaving a trail of emptiness behind you.
"Hm, intense." This is Jungkook speaking, his eyes still lost on the phone screen of him playing a silly online championship. "She will be fine after hours."
"Jungkook is right, now we must move with Yoongi."
Namjoon gets up walking to your room, surprised that everything seems almost the same as it was before their fight.
He smiles when he manages to see his friend laying on the floor sobbing, and like that children's book called Pinocchio, he feels good being that cricket-shaped voice of reason. Only this time that sweet and serene voice, released one and a thousand blasphemies that would contaminate even the most devout by his beliefs.
He managed to convince Yoongi's easy to manipulate mind, blurting out words almost like a song. Playing with the naive self of hes that still lived and breathes inside him.
You had come home after days of spending with Ari and her boyfriend away from him. You really didn't want to set foot in that house again in years, a small irrational part of you believed that it was all his fault, your real problems started when you set foot in that damn place.
You open the door observing the room in the same way, empty. You try not to make yourself feel ready to go to sleep, without having been able to do it in days, but now you doubted that it would be different here.
You remain static in view of everyone, you had forgotten that at that time they were having dinner together. They only met once a day and it had to be right there.
"Good evening, sorry to interrupt." You ignoring Yoongi's gaze that, he's trying not to get too excited about your return, even though she causes he to euphoric whirl. "Carry on, I'll just go to my room."
"Please no, sit with us."
"I'm not well."
"I insist, sit with us. They were difficult days but I know they can fix it." Jin puts a plate in front of one of the empty chairs, you refuse to sit down but you do it out of compromise.
Everyone seems to be exclusively quiet, dinner was gray, like a black and white painting. Remember the first dinner, where everyone seemed to have so much to say and now that was left behind, Jungkook continues to play with his phone sometimes moving his plate by accident, without touching a single silverware with the intention of eating. Jin eats in peace, so slowly that he is strange. Namjoon reads a book in his hand, eating so cleanly that it's amazing.
Hoseok looks at you playfully from time to time, with a smile that almost makes you smile the same. Jimin and Taehyung seem to communicate silently, they both look at each other with slight grimaces and smiles.
"We can talk?" Yoongi whispers, you feel her breath next to you and instinctively you walk away scared. Still hurt by her actions and attitude, you give your vow of silence by standing up and without saying goodbye, you walk up the stairs.
"How rude." Jungkook interrupts, keeping an eye on his screen lighting up his beautiful face. "He didn't even taste the food."
Yoongi looks at Jin, her oldest friend and the one she trusted the most, seeking some advice. But just gets the same treatment as always, a look insisting that go with you and try to fix her mistake.
However, it was late. You had packed a makeshift suitcase by going down as quietly as you could, exiting through the back door like a thief or a fugitive.
You spent days thinking about your cowardly way of running away, but in the same way you felt better and even more so when you did not receive any message from him. Maybe it wasn't that important to him, it hurt but it also relieved you.
You knew it would be awkward to see him in the face again, but you should go back and get your things over with as soon as possible. You naively thought of forming a friendship, a very distant one, but in the end it would be the healthiest thing for both of you.
"______?" Asked the person who opened the door after you barely managed to ring the bell due to nerves, he was clearly confused.
"W-good morning ... Jin." You greet by taking a few steps back to get a better look at it, you had forgotten how tall it was. "Sorry to bother I just wanted to -..."
"Talk to Yoongi? I'm sorry but he's already better without you, he even met someone new." You were surprised by his austere, sour tone and trying to intimidate you. "And you better go, you are not welcome here."
"No ... No, I-I came for my things but I'm glad to know that it's better now, and that ..." The words stayed in your mouth, almost as if it hurt to admit it. "I was able to find someone, I hope we can be friends. Also with you, I'm sorry I left without explaining or saying goodbye properly."
You waited what seemed like ages for her response, and you expected more than a simple nod of the head, letting you pass without a hitch. You searched your room quickly, trying not to have any contact with any of them for now. You opened the door that had your name on it but you were scared by what you found inside, the whole room had been painted blood red, a very dark color that managed to give you such familiar chills.
"What is this? Where are my things?!" You turned around ready to go and claim but the door closed behind you with a stormy noise. You ran to try to open it but it did not move an inch, you searched the whole room for something useful to help you but it was completely empty, and alone.
You sobbed in fear, not understanding what was happening and why it seemed that the walls were getting narrower every second. You fell to the ground, trying to stay calm and without losing your goal, hours and even days passed for you, you waited to hear at least one noise but everything was so quiet that you had to avoid going crazy, you played with your hands trying to distract yourself and think positive things, you had read many books about stressful situations to know that thinking a lot about those things caused even more stress, you lie on the floor sure that a nap will calm everything down, if it was a nightmare you wanted to wake up and if not , you wanted to dream that it was.
A lock, you hear that particular noise and you wake up. You open your eyes as fast as you can lifting your body, the door was slightly open as if someone was exiting. You scream for help but it closes, you fall back into sadness and despair screaming even more for your freedom.
You didn't deserve this.
You look with regret at the delicious food they left for you, for a moment you think about going on a hunger strike but your stomach demands you not to be so stupid. The same would not change anything. Regardless of manners, you eat as fast as you can, dropping quite a bit of food on the ground in your rush.
It had an exquisite taste, and you could recognize it everywhere. It was one of your favorite dishes, you felt disgusted to compare it to your mother's food, but as magnificent as it was, it reminded you so much of her.
You wait for something to happen, but minutes go by in which you just look at nothing, letting your head fly. Thinking of a thousand things, playing with the spoon and singing in a low voice.
You feel hot from one moment to the next, your vision becomes cloudy and the door opens again. You just stay in the same place, you don't care about anything, not even how they hold you by helping you walk into another room.
"You were right, she is very calm now."
You look at him, their faces so familiar and you try to place them, but your head is flying away at that moment. You close your eyes laughing, and drifting into unconsciousness.
You wake up. You open your eyes and you are tied, you struggle with the ropes that hold your arms while the bed below you makes your body bounce. You touch the sheets realizing that they are extremely soft, you are in an unfamiliar room surrounded by scarlet red, with elegant and shimmering decorations. You try to stand up but your legs, like your hands, are tied.
And you're still quiet because of the rag in your mouth.
You fight the bindings furiously, screaming into the cloth as much as you can get sick of being locked up again.
You think of Yoongi, although at that moment it was irrelevant you wonder where she is and if she knew that she was being kidnapped in such a way, would she help you at least? Resignation covers you completely, fighting the bonds again with such force that you feel like they burn your skin every time you move.
You sob, just as he did one fall day.
Yoongi watches you from the monitor in another room, Jin is talking to Namjoon to the side while Jungkook is still sitting in a corner entertaining on her phone. Jimin, Taehyung, and Hoseok seem reluctant to look at each other despite facing each other.
Remember the day, the one in the past, when he met them. Jimin and Taehyung were already friends playing in one of the children's castles, with their hands pretending to be weapons as they ran around. Hoseok was sitting next to his mother, talking and apparently they had a lot to say. Namjoon did not detach from the side of his father who urged him to go up to the games, while Jin was busy collecting Flowers in a basket that his grandmother was holding.
They were all strangers and even more so he, felt out of place surrounded by so many games and away from home. His parents had freed up a whole day to spend together in a decent park, it was several hours of travel from Daegu to Seoul only for his son to play in a beautiful park surrounded by luxurious buildings.
He dropped down next to her mother, hugging her without wanting to let her go.
"Min Yoongi, we didn't take this trip just for you to sit there all day, son."
"I'm scared..." he whispered, biting her lip and hiding her face in the neck of his beloved mother.
"I see... but the games look so much fun. Run and try them, love."
He nodded still uneasy, walking over to one of the swings where he sat rocking so slowly that he seemed still. He felt hands pushing his body from behind, scared he looked at the boy behind him, he had a smile on his face and waved him with a hand.
"Sorry, I thought you needed to be pushed." He spoke and did not seem at all nervous.
"I'm fine, but thank you..." There was a momentary silence before he interrupted again. "I am Yoongi."
"Hoseok, although my mommy calls me Hobi."
He smiled, offering himself this time to push the swing, they spent minutes like this just helping each other take a walk pleasantly. He didn't even think about it when Hoseok offered to talk to Jimin and Taehyung about how they'll all play together in teams.
Now in the present, he smiled again remembering how he met Jin that same day, he had collided with him when he was running so as not to be caught by Jimin. His older friend was flushed with anger, screaming for her flowers and his dirty clothes. His grandmother teased him a bit making him deny even more, he followed Yoongi for several minutes until the chase because of her desire to hit him became a game.
They both fell to the ground tired, laughing before Hoseok introduced himself to Jin. Namjoon arrived shortly after, curious about the commotion and why he had gotten bored of sitting for so long, as he explained later. Besides that his father didn't have the best conversation starters.
He cried so much that very day when he had to go home again, promising to return soon.
"We have everything ready, are you ready?" Jin stood next to him, his eyes looked at him but he couldn't recognize his childhood friend. The same one that he offered to organize his birthday parties when his parents could not afford them, the same one that he never took advantage of his money to lower it. The one who hugged him as many times as he could when he came out of his therapies after his parents died.
Who was this man?
"Y-yes." He murmured still stunned. He got up, following in his footsteps with his head lowered.
They opened the door showing him, you were distracted biting the cloth in your mouth and trying to move your hands to free them.
Your body felt the same repetitive chill making you look at them feeling their presences so... uncomfortable.
"Enough." Jin ordered as you continued your insistent useless movement, trying to free yourself. "I'm not playing around, stop."
Me neither, idiot. You clench your teeth as much as you can at not being able to say it out loud, you stubbornly keep moving even faster than before. Your hair falls on your face from your busy tossing and you stare at him, challenging his patience and judgment.
You try not to tremble when he approaches you with intentions that deep down manage to scare you. But you continue, the bed moves as fast as you do until his hand falls against your cheek causing a gasp to come out of your gagged mouth.
"Hyung!" Yoongi claims holding her hand to prevent her from trying to hit you again, you feel the particular burning on your right cheek and the tears growing back in your eyes. "Please, no blows. That was not what we agreed on."
Jimin cleared his throat, a satisfied smile on his face, "We never specified anything, actually... Yoongi-hyung."
"Jimin is right, you never specified any kind of restriction for her and us." Namjoon clarified making you look at them confused, it was as if they were talking in terms of employment or contract.
But you had never signed anything.
"B-but they can't do that, they'll never accomplish anything if they force her." He tried to persuade him but Jungkook sighed, dropping his phone to the ground and then stepping on it like it was worthless. "She will just hate them."
"She will do it anyway, if we let her off her or try to convince her to stick with sweet words she won't think twice and she will run away ready to report us for kidnapping."
"In addition to the damages that she suffered here." Namjoon continued to condemn Jungkook, uplifting her surname and her family's status.
"You are in this with us or against us, there is still a free place in the basement for you with chains just as heavy."
Again, the same chill ran through you causing you to cringe in your place. These men were insane, they were capable of betraying each other, and worse, they could possibly also consider shooting themselves in the back when they weren't looking at each other. All for you, as if you were some kind of prize for winning and owning.
After moments that seemed eternal, Taehyung was releasing your mouth as you began to complain about what they were doing, how they dared and demanding freedom.
Really a classic, so much so that it was witty and hilarious that you said it literally.
They forced you to kneel on the ground with your hands on your legs still perfectly tied. More questions filled your mouth not knowing what they were planning, all you could do was look at them so scared it was adorable.
"Uh... Well... I guess one should go first." Jin says, taking a few steps away from your crouched figure.
Jimin stepped forward, standing in front of you causing you to look up from your spot below him.
"What are you doing?" You ask weakly, you try to drag yourself away when his hand struggles with his pants to remove it but Jin holds you in place. Getting on his knees to speak into your ear softly.
"You better take a breath instead of trying to run away, honey. I thought you were smarter... hm?" He laughs mocking your scared face, you refuse to open your eyes and mouth making him stop laughing in annoyance.
Jimin sighs taking your face in his hands so roughly that they will surely leave a purple mark on your skin. He was still dressed, I was hoping I could humiliate you more and then fuck your mouth until you suffocate while his hyung explains everything to you. How it all started, his obsession, his plan, they had planned everything so perfect that it was terrifying, everything monopolized on one board.
Soon as soon as possible you will just be a cute housewife and you will forget your life before that day. Not for nothing did they have a closet full of cheerful and homely outfits ready for you, they wanted to destroy you and then put you back together just to serve them.
You would be his wife, of everyone.
"Come on, little bitch..." Jimin started, reaching over to kiss you on the lips even though you refused to do so. You really no longer had a vote or a word of objection in his plans. "Open your eyes darling, you don't want a stray bullet to land in your mother's skull, do you?" He threatened making you obey even more scared than before.
"P-please don't hurt my mother!" You sob, clasping your tied hands in supplication.
"Oh, we won't.... yet." He whispered kissing your lips one last time before imposing himself on your kneeling body. Her cock came out of her pants, stroked a few times before guiding it to your lips. Your stomach contracted, and you pulled your face away as far as you could before Hoseok held you by the hair tightly pulling you close again. "Take it, baby. Everything will be fine if you just obey."
"I hate them, they disgust me" You whisper before Jin forced you to open your mouth making you take it, you fight for a few seconds but her hips are already moving making you choke and gasp. His moans are so loud they make you squirm but his hands hold your head close to him.
"I told you you'll take a breath, but you're a dumb whore." His breath is hitting your neck directly, your skin crawling trying to distract you from anything other than Jimin's cock in your throat causing you to gag and vomit. "I bet you're wondering why, what did you do, and nothing really. Or if Yoongi!"
You do not look at your boyfriend before, you only focus on Jin who smiles, caressing your body with his hands, almost exceeding your limits. However, what did it matter if he did it, there was nothing you could do for yourself.
"You were only here, I think we all loved you from the first moment we saw you. We spent many nights wondering what was special about you, many of us had dated women before but you... You were so different, you had something that attracted us and it made us go crazy. " His hands squeezed your breasts causing you to gasp on Jimin's cock who moaned with pleasure, continuing his steady and hard rhythm. "Taehyung got involved in the matter. "
Jimin smirked when your eyes went up to him, your eyes showing how angry and helpless you felt. And it was exquisite.
"I bet you didn't know about your beloved boyfriend's background,locked up in a rehab center for alcoholics for two years. Three years taking therapy for his depression after the tragic death of his parents, quite strong actually." His words had such a strong past but from his mouth they came out as if it were not so important. Something common for him. "I'm surprised he loved you so much and didn't tell you."
You cried unable to turn your face to look at him, deep down you wanted to put Yoongi aside and not hate him for this. But it seemed almost impossible when he was there, doing nothing, so calm that it was unreal that he had ever looked at you directly and declared his love to you over and over again. For months.
"He really was fine for a while until we decided to make him fall again, one drink after another... First trust him, then question their relationship and finally make them argue." A laugh left his lips, it was almost uncomfortable that he was the only one doing it. Everyone else was so quiet just watching. "But I can't give myself all the credit, let me introduce ourselves well, my dear."
Jimin walked away from you letting you breathe again, you had almost forgotten that he had been doing that act against you. Your tied hands help you hold off the ground by not being able to breathe properly, you feel so weak that you are about to pass out but you refuse to look weak in front of them.
"Kim Seokjin, son of the best chefs in the country and heir owner of thousands of five-star restaurants, inside and outside the country." His body crouched down, making an extremely long bow. Namjoon stood next to him, with the same smile from the day he met you. "Kim Namjoon, the only and adored son of the best lawyers and mayoral candidates, future presidents if occasion permits." There was a strange tone behind his voice, with a knowing wink. "I thought you can guess what Hoseok's parents do, but I'll tell you just in case. Great psychiatrists recognized for their countless achievements outside and within the country, having a tradition from generation to generation, capable of manipulating even the cleverest mind like yours."
Hosoek smiled at you, but this time his smile showed malice and pride. All that time you were surrounded by people who wielded a certain power and influence, oblivious to the fact that they could ever use it against you.
"Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung... Maybe you heard about their surnames on the news two years ago? Families specialized in medicine, their knowledge dazzles science and biology. Before allies and now both surnames are enemies competing for the market, but who would say that their children would meet secretly and use their same knowledge to retain a precise treasure." His hand stroked your hair causing you to recoil angrily, with a grimace of disgust and resignation. "Well... Finally Jungkook, son of the best technology creators in the country. Capable of creating anything, millionaires obviously, like everyone. Faithful lovers and devoted to he son, giving him everything he wants. " He stopped for a moment and then brought his hand to your ear taking out one of your earrings, you looked at him confused before he opened it showing a tiny device that lit up. "Even creating a more than wonderful device, a tracker of the smallest size."
You opened your mouth completely petrified, looking at each and every one of them. Most of them had a firm and conceited posture, but your eyes only looked at him.
"Were you in on this?" You ask by moving your body slightly, Yoongi only remains silent, avoiding looking at you at all costs, even if it is out of mercy you demand a simple word. "Speak! Tell me! Tell me!" You scream completely out of control, letting out all your frustration and anger with him, just him. It's all his fault. "Tell me now! To finally be able to completely hate them all... Please tell me, I just want to stop inventing and fooling my head trying to justify why you are standing there doing nothing for me" You sob almost exhausted, " Without helping me, when before you said you love me."
His eyes meet yours a few seconds before Jungkook chimed in, completely certain that you were trying to play your manipulation cards to get rid of them. Funny, they had done the same to catch you, their hyung could sometimes be so... credulous. That it was ironic that she was older than him.
"Good enough talk for today." He demanded, causing you to hide your head again in fear. You were so scared, even with the pain in your cheek and jaw from being forced by Jimin, you would never give up on them.
Your mouth felt dry, you couldn't remember the last time you drank water alone. As if they could read your thoughts, Taehyung appeared with a tray with a glass of water and a purple pill.
"Take that away from me." You scream when he tries to put the pill in your mouth, backing up as far as your bound legs will allow.
He sighs bored, as if he doesn't have the patience to deal with it, "If you want water you'll have to do this."
"What is it?" You ask almost breathless from the lack of water in your body, he smiles before bringing the pill to his face to look at it rolling it on his finger.
"Hm... Vitamins." Respond after hesitating. "Everything you need in one compact little pill. It was an invention by Jimin and me, we were hoping you would be the first to try it."
A few seconds ago you remember hearing about the reputations of both families, they were specialists who probably passed that knowledge on to their children. If they knew what they were doing with them, they would be shocked. Your reasoning tells you no, to throw it away and try to run away but your head and body can't take it anymore, they demand water and a rest.
"I-it's okay." You accept, removing the pill and the glass of water from the tray angrily. You put the pill in first, then the water so hard your mouth hurts from the force.
You return the glass silently, eyeing him suspiciously before sitting back down and walking a few inches away. You wait for everyone to do something, but they stay so still as dolls that it scares you, everything about them and their attitudes was creepy.
I wish you had noticed earlier.
And now you feel it, it was not pain, nor anxiety. I was just calm, the noises seem to decrease and your vision does not blur but you feel so relaxed that you do not seem to be affected by any drugs. You could feel it all, but you didn't care.
It was relaxing but you weren't far this time, you remember the previous scenes. When you ate the food they gave you, it was similar but as if it had been modified so that you can remain docile and obedient, but at the same time you know what they are doing.
Your body falls on the bed, you don't even try to get up. Your brain isn't thinking about that, it just gets distracted by the decorations around it, but it clearly perceives one of them nearby. Namjoon is behind your body lying face down, half is on the bed and your legs are still kneeling on the floor. You feel his kisses so desperate on your neck, his hands touching your breasts and stomach trying to lower himself further, anxious not to wait to fuck you as he always wanted and should have been.
You do not fight when his legs open yours with force and speed, you just stand still, thinking with your head glued to the soft sheets of the bed, deep down you can slightly feel your desire to push him and push him away furiously, you want to do it but not you do. You feel so confused that you sob into the sheets in released frustration.
"I thought I heard from you, that her wouldn't refuse anything with his stupid pill." Jin whispers, disgusted seeing you struggle with yourself in search of reason.
"I don't see her deny it." Jimin retorts, crossing his arms with a small victorious smile.
Yoongi stands aside, not wanting to accept this but likewise, like you, does nothing to avoid it while Namjoon sinks deep inside you causing you to writhe overwhelmed and let out a groan of pain, your mouth opens to complain and probably ask him to stop, but he instantly closes again only releasing more gasps and squeals.
They spend minutes with all eyes on you, taking the cock of her friend who abuses your sore pussy from overstimulation, this time you are crying and begging for mercy to stop. Even in your unconsciousness you continue to feel all the pain and also the pleasure that is now almost non-existent.
"S-stop!" You cry between gasps of exhaustion, your hands had been released by Jungkook seconds ago so that you can hold on properly. However, you only use them to try to ward off Namjoon who is holding you against the bed by slamming his body against yours with obscene noises. The bed squirms like you, colliding with the wall in sync.
"A little more baby... Just a little more... And I'll fill you with my cum, so fucking tight. You like that, hm?" Her breath very close to your cheek makes you react, you squeeze your eyes almost suffering from your next inevitable orgasm. You scream making everyone watch you fascinated by how your face contracts with pleasure and pain, you try to walk away when the moment of ecstasy recedes, but he continues to fuck you bareback hard, selfishly chasing the release of him against you.
You spent hours repeating the same routine, sometimes sometimes even more hours than you can remember or count.. Your body was completely covered with bruises and marks not only made by them manually, you had discovered in the worst way that Hoseok had a great fetish to make small cuts to any animal or person that had skin and that glistening blood came out of those wounds, red as hell and as sweet as ambrosia.
A delicacy, truly a true delicacy blessed by God.
Jin could not stop laughing at your overwhelmed face, sometimes he would sit next to you while your body was fucked uncontrollably, watching your face move on the sheets with the constant and hard movements of his friends.
"Do you enjoy it, you dirty bitch?" You knew he was making fun of it, not only because it denigrated your dignity, but also because you couldn't answer correctly and the only thing that moved was your head up and down from the thrusts. As if you were affirming his disgusting words. "You like it right?" And again. "I bet you will enjoy it every day from now on, do you want to marry us, little bitch? Be ours forever, that we fuck you every damn day like that, that we also fill you up that you would get pregnant, you would have our children , and you would gladly. Do you accept _______?"
You did not want to know where he managed to get your last name, nor your full name and less because he thought that after the effect of whatever they had given you, you would really accept being his damned wife.
But he just stands there, watching Jungkook abuse his new power against you and taunt him.
I just wanted to wait for everyone to leave, so I could hug you, heal you, and ask for forgiveness.
He couldn't save you if he was chained to the basement like they threatened to do. He was afraid of his own friends, who looked at him madly when hours before he thought of withdrawing from the plan, Hoseok as charismatic as he always claimed to be able to cut his neck so easily if I took you away from them.
Now, they were doomeds.
The painting lost its color once more.
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