#and i got sad so i made this joke to cope

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Random Gothamite: Any sugestion on how to make my house a little bit safer?

Robin (Steph): Put a signal in your from door that says "trigger warning: your dad"

Gothamite: Thanks, Robin... wait... what?

Robin (Steph): Yeah. Most Rogues have daddy issues, it won't protect you from everything, Joker is waay to unpredictable for once, but you are at least free of Riddler, Scarecrow, Poison Ivvy and Two-Face, only to list some of the most famous ones.

[it worked but it seemed to also keep Robin away for a looong time]

[kvrokasaa]

omg i was js thinking abt timeskip kaiser, a renowed pro football player, attending some celebrity event and seeing his mother there SKDJEK 🫨 can you plspls make it a short angsty(?) story w a happy ending pls our boy deserves it :(

take care <3

I tried to make it as angsty as I could, but I probably just made a comfort fic, I'm sorry!

Cw: mention of food, mentions of mother's leaving, kaiser being sad, crying, comfort, angst(?), happy ending, comforting kaiser helps cope with the recent chapter :(, not proofread, 1.5k words

“I seriously don’t know how you do it,” you whisper over to Kaiser, your voice trailing off to a quiet giggle. A smile reaches his face when he hears your giggle, you never fail to brighten his mood. “Do what, meine liebe?” He questions, the pet name rolls off his tongue with such ease, that you’re sure he practices saying it every day.

“I don’t know how you manage to attend these events and functions all the time. It’s my first time and it’s so tiring already,” you hum, grabbing a strawberry covered in chocolate. “At least there’s good food,” you finish. 

Kaiser snorts quietly. That’s what got you to come in the first place. He almost begged you to come with him, but every time he asked he was met with your quick ‘no.’ So, like the man he is, he went to underhanded tactics. He promised to get you good food, and promised that there’ll be really good food there.

You’re thankful that he didn’t lie.

“It’s about keeping up with appearances, meine liebe.” His arm circles around your waist when he sees some nobody looking at you with obvious intentions. “Do you think if I didn’t blow so much money on these stupid things people would still respect me? No. I have to come to these to show people that I’m richer and better than they will ever be.” You almost wanted to roll your eyes. But would it really be Kaiser if he didn’t say something super egotistical?

He chuckles when he sees how close you are to rolling your eyes. Although most of his words were false, some of them were true. If he didn’t come to these and spend so much money, people would not respect him. The world truly is in his hands.

“Okay you goof, I have to use the restroom,” you pressed your hands against his chest as you raised yourself onto your tiptoes. “Make sure to stuff some of that food into my purse when I’m gone.” You joked.

Kaiser followed you with his eyes while you walked to the end of the ridiculously big room for the bathroom. His eyes show everything, especially his love and adoration for you. He laughs a little as he turns his attention back to the speaker. 

But something catches his eye. A slightly tall woman, with blond hair but almost gray now, no. That’s not what makes Kaiser freeze in his spot, that’s not what makes his heart beat ten times faster. It’s the unmistakable red eyeliner. 

Anyone could apply red eyeliner, he tries to reason with himself. Kaiser tries his best to divert his attention back to the speaker, but his eyes cannot seem to leave the woman. His gaze must have alerted the woman because the next second she is looking around for the person.

And when her eyes fall on him, he immediately panics. No way in hell. She can not be here. He must be hallucinating or something. He needs air, fresh air. Why can’t he breathe? 

Kaiser leaves the mansion as quickly as possible, trying to get away from the stuffy crowd. But just his luck, she follows him out. 

“My son, I have been looking for you.”

You leave the bathroom, with your disgust intensified. Why are rich people so weird? Couldn’t that couple have gone home? Who in their right mind would be doing that during a fundraiser? 

A sigh escapes your lips as you make your way to the crowd, ready to tell Kaiser what you just witnessed. 

But when you get back to the table of food, he’s gone. You swear that he wouldn’t just leave you, and he would’ve texted you if he moved somewhere else. Maybe he had gone to the restroom too?

After searching for a little, you end up spotting his blonde and blue hair. But you see a person standing if front of him and he isn’t moving at all. Your brows furrow in a quizzical manner, who is that?

“No.” You hear him say, it was more of a demand than anything. “You’re lying.” The woman in front of him shakes her head, a soft expression on her face. “You may think that, but we both know it’s not true.” She opens her arms, her hands awaiting his shoulders as to pull him into her embrace. 

“It’s me, your mother.” Your eyes widen, why is she here? Why did she decide to come back now of all times?

“I’m sorry for interrupting,” your tone is soft while you look at Michael, a worried expression on your face. “But Michael and I should really be going.” “Who are you?” Her soft expression never falls, almost like she got it implanted onto her face. But you can see the truth, the deception, the root of her lies. She’s only here for the spotlight. She wants to be seen as his mother, as his savior. But you know that she will only ruin him. She will only make him fall deeper into the black hole.

“Oh, I’m guessing you haven’t seen the news,” you start. You look at Michael’s mother, your soft expression immediately faltering. “I’m Michael’s fiancee. It’s very nice to meet you.” You give her a fake soft smile. You don’t want to seem too rude, but you know kindness with a person like this will only lead to your ruin.

“Ah, I thought you were his chafure. You seem awfully-” “Stop.” She turns her attention back to Michael, her faux softness resurfacing. “My dear, you seem tired. Why don’t we-” “No.” He can’t get his head around this whole situation. Why has she come back? Why did she choose now to come back? Does she want money, is that it? Maybe she just wants to be seen with him. Maybe she needs her acting career back and the only way she can get noticed is with Michael.

But he doesn’t want any of that. He tried so hard to look for her, and now she shows up out of nowhere. 

Michael feels like he’s on the verge of a breakdown. 

His mom tries to reach out again, but Michael is too preoccupied to notice. So, you step in, your body in the middle of both of them. Your glare is icy, never relenting when you see his mother’s expression falter. She seems to be caught up in her own little world. Does she not know the damage she created? How dare she walk back into his life like he owes her everything.

No, she owes him everything.

“I don’t know you, but I know of you. I know what kind of person you are and it’s fucking disgusting.” Your tone is sharp as if laced with venom, and it cuts right through her little facade. You can see the second her fake kindness leaves, and you’re left with the disgust and hatred that Kaiser should have. 

“You are not allowed to walk back into Michael’s life when it’s convenient for you. You don’t get to do that. That’s not fair to him at all. 

Do you know how many times he’s tried to find you? You don’t, do you? He’s tried almost his entire life to find you, to find some sort of comfort in his mother. But you left him. You left a child all by himself with someone neither of you could’ve trusted. 

Do you know the first thing he said to me when I first hugged him? He thanked me. He thanked me for being there, for letting him breathe. He has constant thoughts that I’m going to leave him because of your mistakes.

And if you’re a good mother, if you truly missed him, you would’ve reached out in the past and apologized for everything. But you didn’t.

So no. I’m sorry, but not. You do not get to walk back into Michael’s life right now. He can reach out if and when he truly wants to. Please leave.”

Michael’s mother juts her chin up, a little huff leaving her mouth before she walks away. You truly thought that you wedged a block between Kaiser and his mother. You’re scared that if you turn around, you’ll see the hurt and betrayal across his face.

But that’s not it in the slightest. Kaiser is so proud to be called yours at this moment. He’s so very grateful to you. He has never had someone stick up for him in this way before.

Yes, he always acts as if nothing can bother him, even if he shows it on his face a little. But at this moment, he realizes that he wants to be held by you, he wants you to nurture him and to care for him. He wants to turn to you for things he has never received in his life.

Before he knows it, tears gather in his eyes, threatening to spill along his cheeks. His body moves on its own as he makes his way to you.

“Thank you,” his arms looped around your waist, his hold tightening ever so slightly. You thank the Lord that everyone has left or else everyone would see Kaiser crying and you know that he hates showing that to the world. 

You let those thoughts leave your mind, your smile growing back onto your face. “No need to thank me, my love. I meant every word and I will protect you until you’re ready to see her again.”

[lilia-calderus-pet-goat]

Found-Family headcanons for a³'s coven of chaos, part 4: (because they all deserved more time with each other)

(warning: drinking)

(part 3, here) - (part 2, here) - (part 1, here)

Everyone loves to give Señor Scratchy treats, even when Agatha insists they shouldn't.

Señor Scratchy especially loves Billy, Lilia and Sharon. He does likes to cuddle everyone, though. Except Jen, who he's always trying to bite, (???) because he wouldn't be Agatha's familiar if he didn't.

One day Jen jokes that she will turn him into a purse if he rages against her again—and everyone defensively yells at her at the same time. “Okay! Okay! Jeez! I was joking!”

Sharon cuts fruit for everyone every time they hang out together and forces them to eat it before doing anything else.

Jen usually pays for everything. It's the price of her constantly bragging about her, “real job.”

Agatha always teases her about it. One time, Lilia felt bad—and so she “went to the bathroom” and payed for everyone herself.

Billy himself got his first bad alcohol experience at age seventeen at his first big teen party, which Eddie took him to.

He got very fucking wasted very quickly because turns out he's not great at holding his alcohol. So—he begged Eddie not to call his parents, because, “they've bEeN through enOUGH I'M A HORRIBLE SON AND NOT EVEN reALLY THeirS--”

So, Eddie sighed and called Agatha to get him instead. And yes, your girl did drive ALL the way to Eastview—and spent the whole night sleepless, sobering him up to save him from the hungover. She was just glaring at Rio all night long, telling her to go make coffee and no funny business, while holding his head over the toilet. She was surprisingly gentle and comforting during the experience—because she does have her moments—like when Lilia had her traumatic hallucination in Jen's trial and Agatha gently went, “okay” instead of mocking her. That's the vibe.

BUT he still got the scolding of his life the next day. The whole neighbourhood heard Agatha yelling.

During the argument Agatha yelled that, “I'm not your mother!” and he shot back, “I know that, do YOU know that??” Which caused her to avoid him for a few days.

Later, Rio told him how much it actually affected her and why—and Billy felt really bad about it. On mother's day, he gave Agatha a gift basket of stuff he made himself, (with his bio-mom's help.) Agatha said it was tacky and unnecessary—but she actually teared up a bit. She opened the window and yelled at Wanda's abandoned lot to make an insensitive joke about how, “suck it, Wanda, you rank last in the mom list—” as to not show too much vulnerability. But Billy is used to her by now—and he knows that she appreciated it.

Alice always feels sad on mother's day. She visits her mother's grave site and tells her how bad her life is. This year, Billy went with her. And for the first time, Alice only had good things to tell her. About how she broke the curse—and she can finally do something with her life now. About how she got a new job, and a coven.

Also, to cope, Alice got a gift for Lilia and one for Sharon. They may not be her actual mothers—but she appreciates them both endlessly and their support means the world to her. She got them both protective crystals.

You know who ELSE got Sharon a gift??

Well, Sharon doesn't either. She just received an anonymous bouquet of Azaleas and she had no idea who sent it to her.

It was Agatha, but she'd die before admitting it. She's the last person you'd suspect, since she still calls her Mrs. Hart despite how triggering it is, or pretends she doesn't remember her existence at all. In reality, she's grown fond of the Westview residents despite her best efforts not to. She doesn't particularly respect them and she does view them as “lesser,” but she doesn't wish them harm. They did take care of her for three years—and the Agnes role does have bits and pieces of Agatha in it.

Billy finds out through Rio and accidentally tells Alice. Alice tells Jen, Jen tells Lilia, (because she's not about to hide Agatha's embarrassing secret.) and Lilia tells Sharon.

Sharon is surprised but also extremely moved, considering she doesn't have any living family. She wants to thank Agatha, so she gets the idea to throw her a surprise party. (Since she herself hasn't been to a party since Mr. Davis passed away and she really wants to attend one!!)

She gets help from the coven but also invites all the main Westview residents that we know and love. Rio proposes the idea of writing, 'Agnes of Westview' on the cake, to get back at Agatha for always calling them by their Wanda-branded names. Sharon doesn't want to, but everyone else finds it hilarious, so they do it.

Agatha pretends to be extremely annoyed.

She isn't. She just never expected this to happen to her. For people to want to be there—and to see her as someone at least capable of good—someone who deserves a second chance.

They eat and drink together, having a blast. Billy isn't allowed to drink, but Agatha sneaks him a glass. Just ONE glass. You know, to teach him responsibility, as if she's the queen of it. “It's about knowing when to stop, teen.” “oh is it? tell us more”

Sharon is the opposite of a light-weight. She chugs down those shots like they're nothing—and if you ask her, she'll dismissively wave and say she's “lived a life.” Still, she doesn't seem to know her limits, and she gets carried away. At least she prepared some bomb ass charcuterie for everyone!!

Jen is a classy drinker, picky with her alcohol. She knows her limits and always drinks just enough to “make the company tolerable,” since, “no sane person could ever find you idiots amusing without a few shots.”

Lilia becomes incredibly talkative when she drinks and she loses whatever filter she may have otherwise had. Not to say that usually she has too much of a filter, but drunk, she literally becomes Patti Lupone. Jen finds it endearing and listens intently, Alice finds it sort of amusing but also a bit shocking, Rio matches her freak and Agatha just finds it fucking terrifying.

You'd expect Rio to be wilding, but she already does that sober. No, instead, she becomes very clingy and very affectionate—just whipped over Agatha. And she's kind of a light-weight too, which surprises everyone at first. It's because her real form is literally skeletal and her human form is probably maintained magically—so there's less actual real body mass to dilute the alcohol. So, death can tear through the fabric of reality, but metabolising alcohol is just too difficult.

Alice can hold her alcohol very well. She was once the definition of a teenage dirtbag, so she has experience in the field. Now she's pretty sensible. She's also the most clear-headed, even when she's drunk enough to stumble around.

Agatha herself is a slow drinker because she wants to make fun of everyone else for being less sober than her. She's developed a fair bit of tolerance over the years, but when it finally hits it really hits.

During a particularly rough case of drunkenness her and Jen sung karaoke together. Not during Agatha's party, though. Neither of them can quite recall the incident, or so they claim. Unfortunately for them, Alice recorded the whole thing. Rio made it her ringtone, as did Lilia.

Jen forces Lilia to get a skin-care routine. “Doll, I actively choose to look like this because I don't have the time or energy to maintain a youthful appearance. What makes you think I'll spend money on these products that capitaliSe in womeN's InsEcuriTiEs—I'm a divination fraud, you're a beauty guru fraud, we're both senior citizens, I don't care for this—”

And Jen is like, “okay ouch but nO this is nOt what I've been selling. This is new. We're not talking about just a luxury—the skin is the largest organ of the body and is exposed to various environmental stressors like pollution, UV rays, and temperature changes, as well as internal factors like stress and diet. I'm giFting these products to you I mAde them in a cAuLdron.”

Lilia is so flabbergasted by the clarity of Jen's explanation that she agrees. However, she constantly forgets to actually apply it.

Fortunately, Jen never forgets. And Lilia is probably the only person that Jen tolerates to constantly give reminders to.

[itsonlybaby]

𐙚ᣟ݂﹒𝐩𝐲𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐝 - 𝐛. 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐤𝐞﹒

◜♡﹒﹒𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭﹒𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭﹒𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

playlist ! kinda took ur idea and ran with it, i love getting requests

Bellamy Blake- Arkadia

꒰ ୨୧ ꒱ ⸝⸝ It wasn't uncommon for you to flirt with Bellamy, but it was unusual for him to flirt with you back. ﹒ 　 ⊹ 　⤷ cw: smut, plot, nsfw

Flirting with Bellamy was my forte, brushing me off was his. I had stopped counting the number of times he'd dismissed my advances, not really caring. Most of the time it'd be a joke, and most of the time it wouldn't be.

Today was no exception.

I was walking down the halls of Arkadia to the bar where I 'worked' when I passed by Bellamy.

"Hey, hot stuff." I greeted as I always do with a smile.

"That's not my name, y/n." Despite his words, I could always hear a hint of amusement in his voice.

Bellamy always said it was inappropriate, that we were just friends, but that could never stop me. I knew he'd have to give in at one point, who wouldn't with me?

"Right, where are you off to looking like that?" I looked him up and down, he looked good. Though he looked like that every day. Literally.

Bellamy had a look of confusion as he examined his own outfit before connecting the dots and rolling his eyes, "I don't have time for this," He said before turning heel and continuing his walk down the hall.

"You know you love it!" I yelled before doing the same.

Life at Arkadia was simple, the grounders had stopped attacking around a month ago, and our hunting parties would always come back with feasts, it was how life should be.

And I didn't always flirt with Bellamy or shoot terrible pickup lines his way.

I knew when the time was right to do it, most saw it as a funny bit, most saw me as desperate or wierd, and some saw me as a girl trying to find her way which I found completely unrelated to the situation at hand. People usually made it known where they stood on the pyramid; either by their actions or words. But I wasn't sure where Bellamy stood on the pyramid; I was sure his stance fluctuated as the days passed.

Funny.

Desperate.

Weird.

Lost.

Those were the four trifectas of the pyramid.

There were days when I thought I should find my luck elsewhere- like Murphy or Monty, people who would fold the second I even glanced their way. But that was the easy way out, and Murphy wasn't exactly the cutest tool in the shed. I liked the chase with Bellamy; it was exhilarating. The constant back-and-forth banter on how it was inappropriate, how there were better times for flirting, and how bad the pickup line was.

The chase wasn't the only thing that fueled me, it was not knowing the outcome. Despite my confidence, I was sure how this would end with Bellamy, this could go on for years to come, and he could get a girlfriend. I wasn't sure how that thought made me feel- well I did; I just didn't know how to put it into one word.

Disgust, jealousy, hurt.

For my own brain's sake, it was a less-than-appealing thought.

"Hey, Sinclair!" I yelled, entering the back of the bar.

Jasper was already in his usual spot. He sat there every day for 43 days since they got rescued from Mount Weather, the only time he left was when we called Miller to carry him out.

I always asked Sinclair to just ban Jasper from the bar and save us the trouble, but Sinclair said to just let him cope after the trauma he'd been through, having lost someone special to him. So after the first 10 days, I stopped pitching the idea. I wasn't sure what else he was on, it was a sore sight for the other regulars who weren't drinking their way into the grave. It was a sad sight for anyone, but nobody but me had the guts to say anything to him.

I wasn't sure where Jasper was on the pyramid, when he wasn't drinking he was smoking, and when he wasn't smoking he was drinking. The only time he isn't doing either is when he's sleeping.

I like the think that the old Jasper would find it funny.

"So, what is it? Day 40 already?" I ask Jasper while pouring a new batch into the bar's fountain.

Jasper didn't turn to look at me, he didn't try and do anything, he never did. Though I didn't know how he felt since I've never lost anyone I loved.

"Day 43." His head was resting on his arms as he stared down into the half-empty glass, he didn't even feel like drinking, too consumed in his own sadness.

I didn't try to continue the conversation further, knowing the fun, easygoing Jasper was already drowned out by the buzz and taste of the drink in his hands. And I didn't openly argue with him, I already knew he was arguing with himself.

"Two minutes late, y/n." Sinclair said, appearing from the open door next to me.

Sinclair was like a mentor to me, he was tough on me but it kept me in line when I needed to be.

I knew where Sinclair stood on the pyramid, he thought I was trying to find my way in this burned world; which was only half true, the world was factually burned.

I wasn't lost, I wasn't trying to find my way. I thought people were taking it far too seriously for their own good. And no matter what I said, they would always think that.

"Salvation isn't easy, Sinclair." I joked, directing my attention from Jasper.

"Salvation lies within." Sinclair walked by me, taking a seat on the stool behind the bar.

"Salvation," I look to him, "Can kiss my ass." I smiled.

"Language," Sinclair warned, though a smile showed through his frown.

"Nobody deserves forgiveness," Jasper spoke up, in his self-deprecating pity.

I turned to look at him, his glass was now empty and he tossed me a familiar look.

I grabbed his cup and refilled it under the fountain, "Miserable quote of the day, Jas?" I handed him back his drink.

I joked to keep my own sanity around Jasper, his sadness had a way of infecting people. You could've been the happiest person but one minute around Jasper and you're drinking your way to an early grave.

Did it with half our regulars.

Jasper didn't reply, instead, he gulped down the thick liquor and stood abruptly. It wasn't a surprise, it was his usual routine. He'd drink until he felt tired of drinking, then dance until he felt tired of dancing.

All this sadness got me thinking back to my happy memories, I wonder what Bellamy is doing right now.

"You pass by Bellamy?" I ask turning my head towards Sinclair who was absentmindedly watching Jasper find music.

"Yeah, why?" He asked, resting his head on his palm with his elbow propped up.

"Just curious. Is he on watch today?" With how much I think about him you'd think I'd have his guard days down- but I don't- I'm not desperate.

Sinclair sighed, "For the first half, I think."

I smiled widely at this.

Serving at the bar was great, it meant I could socialize, and learn more about people, but most of all?

I could see Bellamy nearly every day.

Everyone used the bar room as a hangout area and eating area, it's where everyone went when they wanted to chill. It's where Bellamy always goes.

And like clockwork, I saw Bellamy's tall build walking into the bar with Miller and Clarke at his sides.

Miller was a nice guy, despite his total resting bitch face which intimidates most- if not all- people. Though, when it comes down to serious situations he isn't one to joke around. I, unfortunately, learned that the hard way when we were talking defense plans and I had the great idea to hit on Bellamy.

I was on guard watch for a week after that.

It was easy to understand where Miller landed on the pyramid, most of the time, he thought I was desperate. He believed I could get anyone else I wanted, and that I should give up on the delusion of Bellamy.

It really pushed my buttons when people couldn't grasp the joking aspect of it all, but I was too deep in the joke to stop.

I could tell Clarke didn't like me by the way she looked at me and by the way she talked to me. I didn't like her either. I wasn't sure why she didn't like me, it's not like I openly talk about hating her.

And it's fairly easy to know where Clarke stood, she told me every time I brought it up, she thought I was weird. Her words never got to me though, nobody ever did, I was very confident in myself.

Not wanting to suffer through my firting Sinclair patted me on the shoulder and took his leave, sad for him, I've been thinking of new ones this entire time.

Bellamy walked up to the bar while Miller and Clarke took their seats at a table, watching Jasper dance very tiredly.

"Let's hear it," I heard him say, already expecting my antics.

I smile, "Hear what?"

"Don't play dumb, I've been waiting all day for this one." My smile was quickly returned with a grin as he leaned on the surface.

"Why don't we skip the talking and go back to my room." I placed three cups full of liquor on the bar.

I was expecting him to laugh my comment off, return to his friends, and make some witty comments.

"Might take you up on your offer if you keep dressing like that,"

His tone was the opposite of his smile, he sounded serious.

Maybe he was drunk.

But he hadn't even drunk.

This was the first time he didn't brush off my flirting.

I felt all my confidence go out the window, finally not having a witty comeback I stared towards the ground. Feeling my face fog over with a deep red I hoped he didn't notice, I hoped he took the drinks and left.

But the world never worked in my favor.

"Look at me," Bellamy said.

I didn't hesitate to obey his command, looking up at him to be met with a cocky grin.

Bellamy noticed the red lining my cheeks, he didn't know I'd fold this fast.

"That's a good princess." I watched as he took all three cups in his big hands and turned his heel towards Clarke and Miller.

I was left stunned.

"Can I get another drink?" Jasper slurred.

"Shut up..." I breathed out.

I watched Bellamy's figure that entire night, he knew it too, I didn't try to hide it. But I knew he was watching me too, he watched as I interacted with people, while I poured drinks, and watched me watch him.

Why was I so nervous over two simple sentences? I was supposed to be in control.

The night was full of shameless staring, eye fucking each other from across the room. A complete switch from this morning.

My mind imagined what was under his clothes, what was below his waistline. The thought made my whole body shiver.

The hours passed by antagonizing slowly. Jasper got mad and voluntarily left the bar while Clarke and Miller took their leave, and once they left so did the rest.

But Bellamy didn't leave.

He stayed until the bar room was empty and the only thing you could hear was the low hum of music from the bar's old iPod recovered from Mount Weather.

Knowing it was just me and Bellamy left in the bar I felt nervous.

Was he going to leave too? Turn heel and pretend it didn't happen? What did happen? Why am I asking so many questions?

Bellamy was sitting at a table in the middle of the bar, gazing at me as I emptied the fountains into buckets for the night. Thanks, Jasper.

My hands were trembling the entire time, I was too focused on trying to look normal I didn't even notice when Bellamy stood up, I didn't notice when he walked to the bar, and I didn't notice when he leaned on it.

Placing the lock on the barrel I stood up once again, being startled when I locked eyes with Bellamy.

"Got anything else for me?" He asked, looking me up and down.

Confidence.

"I need you..."

That is not confidence.

"Go to your place, I'll be there soon." Bellamy stood up correctly while speaking, his body now towering over mine from across the bar.

I wasn't sure if it was because I felt intimidated or curious, but my chores had been long forgotten. My only goal now was to listen to Bellamy.

He stared with a smile, watching me walk out of the bar and down the hall towards my room.

Thousands of thoughts were racing around my mind.

Maybe he was just pranking me, or standing me up, finally getting payback for all the inconvenient times I've hit on him like a desperate dog.

One thing was for sure.

I knew where I stood on the pyramid.

Sneaking into my room I realized the mess I left it in when I woke up late this morning.

"Shit!" I whisper-yelled, quickly tending to the mess unsure of how much time I'd have.

What was I meant to do in these situations? Undress and look sexy on the bed? Just stand here and wait? Stare into the wall and think about my actions that led to this point? Only one of those options sounded good to me at this moment.

And it was definitely not the first one.

But what if he was expecting that?

I shut my mind up when I heard three knocks.

I didn't need to check to know it was him. What do people do in these situations? Do I wait before answering?

Confidence.

Opening the door I was met with Bellamy looking down at me. He wasn't in his jacket and he carried a serious face.

"Do you, um, wanna come in?" I ask, my voice wavering.

My confidence once again crumbled at the sight of him.

"I wanna do more than that," Bellamy said before walking inside, once the door was closed he pressed his lips to mine.

Something primal took over Bellamy, he kissed me wildly as we walked backward towards my bed. We didn't part once, not even when he roughly dragged my pants down and undid his, or when he tore my shirt to get to my breasts.

The cold air hit my nipple but was soon covered by his big, calloused hands. I moaned into the kiss and he smiled, parting from the kiss to get a full view of my chest.

I bit my lip as I watched him, his gaze shifting from my breasts, down my stomach, and towards my cunt hiding behind my panties.

"You were so cocky this morning," His hands roamed down underneath my panties, "What happened, princess?"

The feeling of him exploring my body made me shiver and let out a breathy moan.

I couldn't believe Bellamy had me crumbling and melting under his gaze and touch. It was everything I'd been dreaming of, I knew I wouldn't last long with his praise.

"Stop teasing." I breathe out, bucking my hips up more into his hand, needing more than his fingers.

He smirked and snaked my panties down my thighs at a teasingly slow pace.

"Careful what you wish for."

He gripped my thighs and spread them apart, my lips parting with them. Bellamy used one of his hands to lower his boxers just enough to reveal his hardened cock.

I shivered at the contact it made with my cunt, "Please."

With a smirk, he lined his tip up with my entrance, and with a light thrust, he only inserted the tip.

I propped myself up on my elbows and watched his tip enter me, despite the little amount he was giving me I still felt the pain of the stretch. I needed more, I needed him; all of him.

"Bell, please, more," I said in a whiny voice staring up into his brown eyes.

"Brave princess, huh?"

I wasn't expecting him to thrust fully into me, but I was glad he did. The feeling overtook my entire body with a shake of my legs causing me to throw my head back with a loud moan, despite the pain a soft smile appeared on my face.

Bellamy let out his own series of groans at the tightness around his cock, the sight of me such a mess over his dick was beautiful to him, knowing he caused this, knowing I could follow his orders so well.

"Good fucking girl." He groaned out, running his hands down my thighs and to my hips, gripping them tightly as he began thrusting into me roughly.

I couldn't keep my eyes open, pain being mixed with pleasure making me shut them tightly.

"Keep your eyes open, princess, I want you to watch,"

I opened my eyes and watched as his cock pounded into me, the wet coat clearly visible despite the low lighting.

Bellamy used one of his hands to start circling around my clit as a reward for listening to him.

I was already reaching my climax, his fingers guiding me to my peak.

"I'm so close, Bell," Lewd sounds filled both our ears.

"Let it go, it's okay," He deepened his thrusts when he leaned forward, ghosting his lips on my cheeks and giving kisses to my jaw.

My entire body shook as my orgasm hit, I grabbed onto his back and dug my nails into the flesh; needing to grip onto anything while he fucked me through my high. The pleasure was unlike anything I've ever felt, him being so close causing me to breathe in his scent- it was intoxicating.

"That's my good girl, just like that," Bellamy exaggerated out the 'just.'

Bellamy pampered my neck with his kisses, leaving surprises I'd find in the morning. But I was too starstruck to care, only thinking about how well he fit in me.

I could tell Bellamy was close, he sounder louder with his grunts, and his hips couldn't keep up with his thoughts. I ran my fingers from his back and into his hair, gripping it slightly.

Bellamy began thrusting more wildly and faster, chasing his high until he finally reached it.

"Princess," He pulled out and rested his dick on my stomach as he came with a loud groan in my ear.

Coming down from his high Bellamy pulled away from me, letting me see his cum that decorated my stomach. Before he could grab a cloth I scooped the cum up with my fingers and stuck them in my mouth as he watched; the salty taste invading my mouth while I bit my lip at his reaction.

Bellamy only smirked at me before zipping his pants back up.

"Want me to stay?" He asked, watching me crawl under the fur covers.

"Of course I do, hot stuff." I scooted over giving Bellamy enough room to slide in next to me.

"That's not my..." He cut himself off, "Alright, princess." He smiled as he pulled me into a small kiss.

I learned two things that night.

Bellamy was amazing in bed.

And I didn't care about the pyramid anymore.

◜♡﹒﹒𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭﹒𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭﹒𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 5 part 4

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])

(this is a sad one, apologies in advance)

agatha just had the unimaginably traumatic experience of her mother's evil ghost possessing her body, so of course she cracks jokes. she's shaking like a leaf, but hey, coping mechanism gotta cope!

when evanora tried to execute agatha, stealing secrets or whatever was only an excuse, she was punishing her daughter for the sin of being born. whatever she says, her so called worry for these other witches is also an excuse. she's simply furious that someone has begun to think of agatha as a person rather than a monster. it's once again a selfless VS selfish paradox, evanora is always framing her actions as selfless and for the greater good, but her hatred for agatha is undeniably raw and personal. I would love to learn what evanora's life was like, who were her parents? what turned her into such a hateful mother?

(look at how angry rio already is. and alice always protecting the person closest to her by default.)

this is the ultimate humiliation for agatha, someone who has always kept her past and struggles so close to the chest. now one of her deepest traumas is laid bare for everyone to see and judge. she's always trying to come off as strong and unfeeling and formidable, but here she is, a sad little girl abused by her own mother.

btw I see you all have strong feelings about ghosts and billy's powers! lol I got so many comments. I see you, I see you! Granted I'm not actually super invested in my ghost theories, this being a made up marvel show and all, but here's what I think:

agatha says to wanda, "you have no idea how dangerous you are, you're supposed to be a myth, a being capable of spontaneous creation, and here you are, using it to make breakfast for dinner!" agatha, one of the most powerful witches ever existed, could not create food for nicky. like, the scope of wanda's powers (and billy's by extension) is the kind of scary that can reshape reality itself and truly and properly fuck up the Sacred Balance or whatever rio calls it.

when I say billy created a ghost evanora, yes it's a copy but in the same way a Star Trek transporter makes a copy, you know what I mean? whether the orignal stays behind or not, billy's evanora is the real evanora. and if you believe in souls, that gets even more complicated! did billy take evanora's soul from the afterlife and plopped her in here, or did it copy it too? and was wanda actually able to create billy's and tommy's or did she catch the wandering soul of stillborn twins?

see I don't think evanora was a ghost prior to this (again, I might be proven wrong in the future, but this is where I'm at right now). if that were the case, you know she'd been haunting agatha's ass, wouldn't have given her a moment of peace. maybe rio took extra care to send her to the afterlife, idk. now rio looks shocked and angry to see evanora, like this is a new development.

rio's voice is literally roaring with anger

like i cannot overstate how much rio hates and despises evanora for what she did to agatha

evanora zeroes in on rio, approaches. rio takes a whole step back and makes herself smaller. she's nervous. she says that ghosts are cheaters, but it goes beyond that, doesn't it? rio understands life and death, but a ghost is neither, or both. it goes beyond all her control and expertise, and for the first time since we've known her, she's at a disadvantage. ironic, isn't it, considering what happens to agatha in the finale?

agatha, who's been cowering in a corner, chooses this moment to approach. does she want to protect rio and billy and the others? or is she so desperate for an ounce of love and affection from her mother that she, coward as she is, actually wants to put herself in arm's way?

while everyone is focused on agatha, alice looks at rio. she is putting together evanora's words, agatha's terror and rio's hatred. jen is being selfish. alice, generous alice, could never be selfish

the last time agatha saw her mother she was still a kid. now she is a mother herself and the mere thought of not loving, not wanting to protect your child, of actually going out of your way to harm them? it's simply inconceivable to her.

the shock. the tears forming in her eyes. the same heartbreak she felt when she realized her mom was about to kill her at the stake. she's feeling small and wretched and unloved like only a parent can make you feel

it's the matter-of-fact tone she uses. it's worse than hatred. she despises agatha beyond hatred

there is a moment in a child's life when they see a parent clearly for the first time, their weakness and their flaws. this is especially true for an abused child, it comes a day when you realize that despite being called bad and evil and blamed for the pain happening, it was never really your fault. agatha knows what a parent's love should look like now. and this is not it.

rio visibly deflates. she is the only person in the room agatha opened up with about her mother. there is nothing she can do to spare her pain now. she has no power against evanora

alice has a blinding moment of shock, realization, pity. she knows only too well what generational pain and trauma can do to a person. but she still had a mother who loved her. agatha didn't.

jen, who used to be a healer, can no longer feel compassion. jen has had to learn to protect herself above all others. because evanora hurt agatha, and agatha hurt jen in return.

and when it's all said and done, agatha will always beg. all her power, her brains, her experiences are nothing. she regress to that girl at the stake. I can be good. please.

alice, who's always been the first to jump to everyone's defense, who always puts others before herself. she has seen agatha bare and helpless, she has seen that raw core that agatha has always hidden and, in her final moments, she's accepted agatha in her coven. it's more instinct than rationality, but alice has always been a heart over head kinda girl. if she can see the harpy, if she can see the pain, by GOD she'll do something about it.

“The Knight of Wands.” full of fire, fights bravely.

lilia's gut-wrenching scream. she knows what is happening. agatha already told her.

a succubus who hasn't fed in so long. I keep thinking, there was never anybody who loved her enough to teach her control, to seek alternative solutions to satiate her hunger. rio never could, rio cannot interfere with who lives and who dies. but could a coven together have fed her? could a big coven have donated power little by little, and kept her safe and valued and protected? nurtured her in every way? or was she always doomed from the start? was evanora right, did alice sign her death warrant the moment she chose to love agatha? I know what my answer is to all that, but what do you guys think?

and another question for you: billy casts around desperately for help, nicky answers. was nicky, or rather a shadow of nicky, created by billy too? or was the son of Death powerful enough and scared enough to reach out on his own, maybe with just a little push on billy's part?

a name was all it took for agatha to pass her trial, and look how much was needed to get it out of her. only billy's chaos could do the impossible: drag agatha's ravaged and wrecked heart to the surface. billy only wanted to help her heal, but he's a just a boy with the power to shape the universe. it took evoking ghosts and dredging up horrible trauma to make all of agatha's defenses crumble and raw-beat her into admitting her pain, into maybe, if we're lucky, starting on the road to recovery. oh, billy. you don't know how to handle things gently yet, with your big man's hands and your young, too young soul.

she stops IMMEDIATELY. she didn't know how to control her hunger, until now. the monster was human all along

by. as in, by billy, because he did it all. and also, good-bye. good-bye, mama.

oh, alice. there are no words.

and now they're no longer just numbers, just fools she conned and killed and abandoned on the road. now it's the girl with the big luminous heart, who sang the Ballad with her, who shared her same pain, the first human being in agatha's life who wanted to selflessly help her.

there is a moment, in a child's life, when they see a parent clearly for the first time.

go to episode 5 part 5

[luveline]

Hey if you're still taking requests could I get any sort if angst to comfort for zombie au steve? Been feeling down lately and I've always loved that series!

ty for requesting! zombie au. fem, 1.5k

The new pencils are oil-cored, as opposed to his last ones, which had been wax. They were just fine, but these oil pencils allow him to blend colours and shades with more finesse than ever. He can pour twenty different colours into the tone of your skin and have them blend into a real, phototechnical you. 

He’s pretty proud of this one. 

He wakes up first every morning, allowing for time where you’re unaware and he’s got nothing to do. He’s sketched you so many times it comes naturally. Steve probably wouldn’t need to look, but watching you sleep is half the joy of drawing you. 

You're drooling a little. 

Steve puts the handful of pencils he’d been using to colour your neck back into his pen case. He puts the case and his sketchbook on top of his main bag, shoving it into a corner of your tent with the rest of the bags to climb back onto the bed. It’s a portable cushioning made for camping, and it’s nothing like a mattress, but it is much kinder to your backs than sleeping on the ground. Warmer, too. 

He pushes your head back, knowing it will wake you, his thumb to the little drool line to wipe it away, his palm on your cheek to hold it. 

“Hello.” He kisses your other cheek as your lashes twitch. Doesn’t even think about not doing it. “Good morning.” 

“Morning,” you mumble strangely. 

“What’s that?” he says, soft to match your quiet. His breath kisses your lips. “What’s wrong? You sound sad.” 

You force your eyes apart, and you feel along the mattress with your hand. Steve watches in real time as your eyes fill with tears, huge, heavy tears that well in the corner of your left and spill from the right to wet the pillow under your head. 

“What’s wrong?” he asks, the effort expended to stay calm so gutting he has to squeeze the pillow just shy of your head. 

You grab for him, blankets and your half-open sleeping bag crinkling but not too thick to feel the force of your fingers gripping his sides. 

You must’ve had a bad dream, that’s what he thinks. He’s had enough of them, and he’s unfortunately cried after almost all of them. Sometimes you’ve seen it, sometimes you haven’t, but you look at him with love no matter what —he can forget dreams of losing you when you’re murmuring niceness in his ear, and he can give it back to you. 

“It’s okay,” he says, letting you squeeze him hard. “Don’t cry.” And that’s a little awkward of him, that sneaking panic, but he’s never claimed to be a professional. 

You cry in a weird breath that borders a gag. “I’m so-sorry.” 

“It’s okay, it’s fine. I have bad dreams too. You know that.” 

Steve attempts to get both arms behind your shoulders, pulling you into him, sitting you up. He can’t cope with how quickly you’ve fallen apart. To wake up crying, how scary the dream must’ve been, he hates it. 

“It’s okay,” he says. 

“It was a good dream,” you say. 

Steve frowns. “Okay, so what’s the problem?” 

“We had a house. We had a dog. I don’t– don’t even know if you like cats, but you had a dog, and we,” —you sob between words, not too loudly as to travel far, but aching— “were planning a trip. It felt so real, Steve. You were so happy.” 

Steve tries to process it as fast as he can. “Oh,” he says softly, hand lax where it had been rubbing your shoulder. 

“You were so happy,” you say again, burying the tip of your nose into his neck. You’re practically crawling atop him, but he’s strong enough to stop you from laying him down. 

“It’s okay, honey. Jesus,” he says, patting your back again. “It’s alright. It’s okay.” 

“We’ll never have those things.” 

“Baby, who says so?” he asks in a murmur. 

“We’ll never get to go anywhere together–”

“It feels like we’ve seen pretty much all of America,” he says. He’s joking, but travelling with you from place to place has felt expansive. You’ve seen forests and lakes, a thousand different houses, hundreds of neighbourhoods, and street art and installations and billboards for movies that were never screened. Steve’s seen about as much of the world as he wants to see. “I’d just stay in this tent with you forever if they let us, we don’t need to go anywhere else.” 

“You wanted to see palm trees,” you say, sniffling and pained as your tears warm the curve of his trap. 

“I’ve seen them,” Steve says. “Don’t worry. I’ve already seen palm trees. A whole bunch of them. Don’t worry about what I wanted in the dream, it was just a dream.” 

He gives you a quick kiss, his lips to the very edge of your temple. 

“I feel like I’m gonna be sick.” 

Steve nods. He draws from you reluctantly and opens the tent, ushering you on knees to sit out in the cool air. He sits next to you, dewdrops from the grass wetting his jeans, the sky a humming of early morning colours; the sun rises in bands of orange and raspberry pink, darkness above, sun rays kissing the sides of tents and the portables in the distance. 

You take deep breaths. Steve holds your hand, the two of you looking up at the strange sky. 

“We’ll never be that happy,” you say. 

Steve can hear your agony, and he knows what you mean. He thinks of that life with you and never lets himself think far. You would've gone to college, maybe, and Steve would’ve drove to visit you —he would’ve moved. Maybe in your second year you’d live together in a suburb just between college and his job, whatever it is he’d ended up doing, in a house you chose, with a ring on your finger. Steve wants kids but if you don’t then perhaps you’d have had none, but he still likes to picture you with your babies, a big family, years later. And maybe he’d have a dog. A silly looking one with bark worse than its bite. 

And you’d be together. You would be happy. Nothing to hurt you. Nothing to lose you to. You’d never worry where your next meal was coming from, you’d never feel cold. 

Steve breathes out. Sniffs biting air. “We’ll never be that happy. That kind of happy. We’re never gonna go on trips, maybe we won’t ever have a house, but–“ He pulls your hand toward him, your eyes latching on to his. “But maybe we will. We might not get to watch cable, but we can have a tv, in a living room. We can live together, and maybe we will take trips. I don’t know. I don’t know what we’ll have, but I’m already happy. You don’t have to cry about me being happy.” He shakes his head. “Shit, you shouldn’t. I want that life with you so much I dream about it too, but I have this one.” 

“You think we’ll have a house?” you ask hopefully. 

“We can’t live like this forever.” He’s promising it. “Something has to give.” 

“I want us to have more,” you say. 

A weak confession, your cheeks wet with tears but eyes thankfully drying, your eyelids puffy already from sleep and crying alike. Steve wants you to have everything, even if everything is a stupid thing to think you’ll have. 

“We will.” Steve closes one eye, a sort of prolonged wink of pain as his nose wrinkles. “But this is enough for now, right?” 

“No.” 

You’re kidding, to Steve’s relief. 

He laughs and elbows you, glad to see your smile as you evade poorly. “Say it’s enough!” 

“No way.” 

You don’t wait for him to pull you in or ask if it’s alright, flopping without ceremony into his lap, and then turning toward him to hug his stomach. He looks down at you fondly, hand rubbing up your warm back. You’re still clammy from sleeping, but you’re not crying anymore. 

“It’s really cold out here.” 

“I know.” He blows a warm breath in your ear. “Do you still feel sick? Don’t barf in my lap.” 

“I’m sorry, Steve. It just felt so real.” 

His voice turns to a silky whisper he’s only ever used in love. “I know. I’m sorry.” 

“It’s fine. We never would’ve… I’d never get to be here,” —you squeeze him around the waist— “if we were in a world where we also get the house and the dog and… the family…” 

“But it would’ve been nice,” Steve finishes, looking up from your back to watch as the raspberry bands of pink turn to blue. 

“It would’ve been perfect.” 

[respectthepetty]

Joke's (Sad) Face

This post is about Joke's face.

But it's not about his actual face.

It's about his Joker face.

While Joke was surrounded by Jack's blue at the hospital, I just couldn't stop thinking about how pretty War is.

Which is why it's so tragic that his character, Joke, spends so much time being sad.

He has been sad since the very beginning and has remained in this state throughout the series.

Which is probably why he created the red Joker moniker.

A joker is a trickster. A joker is similar to a jester. A joker should be happy.

But Joke is anything but happy and his sadness began when he was child who couldn't cope with academic stress, so he began to use the sad face.

Then a kid he never met fixed his frown and turned it upside down. Jack made him smile.

And years later, at a bar late at night, that kid would make Joke smile again.

By simply sitting with him.

Joke was sad about his life, and Jack told him that it was okay.

Then he told him to smile.

Because like I believe, War Joke is so beautiful when he smiles.

Jack, with his blue (spray bottle), has been wiping Joke's sadness away for years, even without knowing it.

And as Joke returned to his childhood home to all the sticky notes marked with red sad faces, he believed he would never be as happy as he was with Jack again.

The time Joke spends with Jack is the happiest of his life because Jack makes Joke happy, which is why Joke got the smiley face tattoo.

Because Jack was a truly happy kid when they first met, and gave that happiness to Joke.

But things change.

Joke's other tattoo is of a dual smiling face and sad face, and when Joke approached Jack after five years, he said he wanted to bring back the old Jack. After that encounter, Jack asked his grandmother if he had changed to which she responded that he couldn't stay a kid forever.

Jack let Joke escape in the fashion event. Jack was blamed for the necklace being stolen, yet showed up to the hotel to help Joke. Jack put himself in the way during the fight to keep Joke safe. Jack always turns the worst situations around and has sacrificed parts of himself as a result.

So Jack is darker now. He is no longer blue. He is black. He can't be Joke's source of happiness when he is struggling to find the good in life himself, so while Joke is in the hospital surrounded by Jack's blue with family and friends, Jack sits alone wearing a red shirt with one tiny lamp to give him warmth.

Jack has his grandmother, who blends both his and Joke's colors, but she's all Jack has ever had, and now she cares for Joke just as much as she loves Jack.

And this is a point Aran made in the very beginning and Hope repeated this episode — Jack, just like Save, doesn't really much. He doesn't have options. Joke does. Jack had to do what he had to do to survive and keep his grandmother safe, but Joke gets to return home to a family and a room that has been kept spotless. Jack doesn't. Well, not if he doesn't fight for it.

And that's what hurts. Jack has to fight for everything. So even though Joke has done a lot for Jack, Jack has done just as much for Joke. He gave Joke a place to stay, food to eat, friends, family, and happiness when Joke had nothing to give and nowhere to go. Jack himself has nothing, yet still gave Joke everything he has had to fight for, including his limited happiness and even the last bits of his color.

So it's important that the episode showed Joke not only giving Jack his color, but also his happiness. Joke has finally turned his sad face into a happy face, on his own.

Joke is depressed, and for so long, because of that, he believed that he couldn't be a source of happiness. Yet on this journey, he has brought happiness to his friends, grandma, and countless people along the way, so here he is, not only giving his color to Toi Ting and Jack, but also his happiness.

Jack has never wanted to see Joke's sad face, which is why he gave Joke his happiness.

And now that Joke is realizing that he is happiness, hopefully Jack never will.

But they'll have to fight for it first.

[inuxi]

that ask was rude of me, i should've just blocked you instead of telling you about it, i'm sorry. i'm aroace and sex+romance repulsed, and i guess i thought alastor was gonna be something i could enjoy for once like everyone else gets to without feeling like i'm intruding on a conversation i have no right to be part of. i'm on ios so i can't use browser extensions to actually get rid of all the alastor ship posts like i want, and i'm not sure my problem even has a solution short of just giving up trying, because so far i have found exactly zero blogs that are 1.) still active at all, 2.) still post about Hazbin, 3.) aren't actually 12 years old, and 4.) don't post about fucking Alastor ships. i got so excited seeing such good, recent art i haven't nuked yet considering how old every other post i can still see is, and i'm not kidding when i say i sent that ask through tears. it was rude and unacceptable either way, and i'm sorry.

i've blocked over 200 different people and i'm not exaggerating that number even a little bit. i would rather put a gun to my head and pull the trigger myself than see them so much as breathe next to each other ever again. i am so. so so so so so sick of searching and searching and searching and finding nothing.

the thing i've learned from alastor's aroace representation is that not only is the world as a whole not made to accommodate me, fandom space isn't either. i am an alien on a planet i was never made to fit into, and i don't even get to escape that through fiction like everyone else does. no amount of filtering and blocking and searching will bring into existence a community for me that simply does not exist, and it is futile for me to try. that's what this fandom has taught me.

i think the chances of me sticking around in this fandom are slim, so at least it won't be an issue for anyone else anymore. i think being excluded from conversations about an aroace character sting a lot more than just not being represented at all to be honest.

Okay, listen.

First of all, Alastor is officially an Ace, NOT an aroace. That means he can still be interested in any romantic things or finding a couple. No one is stopping you from seeing him exclusively as an aroace. But shaming people who don't share your point of view is a bad idea.

Secondly, I am an aroace artist myself. Romantic and sexual themes are virtually non-existent in my art. I can joke about it, but almost all of my drawings explore completely different things. And you come to me and try to talk about how hard it is to feel socially comfortable being an aroace? I understand your worries, but, again, trying to shame other people because they don't share your point of view is NOT a healthy coping mechanism.

Third, I have done THREE drawings in all my time that include a romanticized Alastor. Two of them were collabs, and the third was asked to be drawn by people. And these three drawings made you give up on my art, which you said you really liked?

The community is too heavily oriented towards romantic and sexual themes, it's true. People like us are often uncomfortable in that environment, that's also true. But aroace people can't just come in and ban others from having fun just because we don't find that fun or interesting.

Man, I'm not even Alastor's artist! What the kind of Alastor shipper am I? And you picked me out of a thousand people to block? Oh my God, that's as funny as it is sad.

In case you haven't looked at my art, I am a Lucifer artist. I very rarely draw Alastor, simply because I don't find him interesting enough. And because of that, I find it so funny to be labeled an “Alastor shipper”

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Happier than ever

Pairing: Elizabeth Olsen x Fem!Reader

Summary: Your previous relationship was toxic and you're still coping with it.

Disclaimer: English is not my first language. This was requested by one of you 🤗

Warnings: Mention of domestic abuse and toxic relationship

MASTERLIST

“Babe,” you called out as you walked inside the kitchen where your girlfriend was making dinner for both of you.

“Yes, love?” Elizabeth replied without turning back, though she reached out her free arm to curl around your waist as soon as you got close enough.

You leaned over to take a deep breath and look inside the pan, groaning when your mouth watered at the sight and smell. Elizabeth chuckled and pinched your side playfully, making you squirm away with a laugh. “How long until we can eat?” You asked with some sort of playful plea behind your words.

“Soon. Can you keep the black hole you call your stomach in check until then?”

You knew she was playing with you, teasing, the same way she always did, but you still bit your bottom lip when tears pricked at the back of your eyes. It was silly, but you had a hard week and you were quite sensible about everything lately. Deep down you knew it was a joke. At that moment, though, you asked yourself if Elizabeth thought you were eating too much. And, if so, if she thought you had gained weight.

“What were you going to ask me?” Elizabeth asked, snapping you out of your thoughts.

You were about to ask something totally different, but you couldn’t brush the worries to the side. “Are you saying I eat too much?” Her reply was to scoff and roll her eyes, which was not an answer at all and only made you worry even more. You didn’t press the subject, even if you wanted to insist on a direct answer. “Well, I was going to ask if you’re going to be here next week. Friday.”

“No,” Elizabeth said without missing a beat, but this time she turned her head to give you a sad smile. “I travel on Wednesday, remember? I have the Comic Con coming up.”

“Oh, right,” you sighed and frowned.

Elizabeth’s busy schedule was a surprise to you since the beginning of your relationship. You could barely keep up with it, couldn’t even understand how it was possible for someone to travel so much, but you liked to think you were getting better at it. It has been six months since you met and four since you officially started dating, but those have been the best months of your life, for sure.

“Why do you ask?”

“Oh, my friend is throwing a party and invited us,” you explained. “But I will tell them we can’t go.”

“I can’t go,” she corrected you, clearly confused as she threw you a glance. “You can. Or do you have something else to do?”

“Oh,” you breathed out. You didn’t realize it, but your fingers were grabbing your telephone harder than they needed to, your knuckles going white. “I just… Well, since you can’t go, and it’s a nightclub, I thought…”

You thought you weren’t allowed to go, but you didn’t say it out loud. You had a girlfriend now, you were in a relationship, and you weren’t supposed to go out without Elizabeth, especially not to a nightclub. Just after that thought crossed your mind, you wanted to scold yourself.

Of course you could go, of course you could have fun, of course you were allowed to be outside without your girlfriend. You just had to keep reminding yourself of that because it didn’t come naturally to you.

“You should go,” Elizabeth said, once again taking you out of your head without even realizing it. “That’s your friend from college, right? You told me you missed her.”

“Right, yes,” you mumbled. She moved to grab something and you took two steps back to give her room to do so, going silently as you watched her for a few more seconds. “I will think about it.”

You are mostly in silence, although Elizabeth kept talking about her upcoming agenda so you didn’t have to say much. She seemed excited to do interviews with her castmates and to see some of them again, and didn’t notice you were oddly quiet. You washed the dishes after you were done eating and you both watched some comedy movie before going to bed to sleep. You woke up feeling much better the next morning, thinking last night had been just a small downfall.

[...]

It happened again two weeks after Elizabeth was back from her trip. You were at your apartment this time eating pizza and drinking wine because neither of you wanted to cook. You were sitting at the table trying to finish off some work you brought home while Elizabeth was sitting across from you reading some of her lines for an upcoming shooting, both of you in comfortable silence.

It has been maybe half an hour or less that you were taking notes and writing down a few things when you remembered something and quickly grabbed a post-it to scribble four numbers on it. You reached out to glue it at the table in front of your girlfriend and she lowered her papers to look at it with confusion. She arched her eyebrows and looked at you, clearly asking for an explanation, and you shrugged.

“I changed my phone’s password yesterday.”

Elizabeth blinked at you, then looked down at the four numbers you had picked to be your new password, then back at you. “Is this your password?”

“Yes.” You nodded, already turning your attention back to your work. You were already biting the back of your pen again trying to decipher the numbers your team had provided you with when you noticed she was still looking at you. “What?”

“Why did you give me your password?”

You opened your mouth to reply, only to quickly close it again when you realized what you were about to say. Your cheeks burned in shame when you noticed what you did and why you had done it, and you quickly reached out to grab the post-it again, crumpling it with your hand and choosing not to reply to her. It would sound as stupid out loud as it did inside your head. She didn’t ask for your password, she never even asked to look at your phone, to see your text messages, to take a look at your DMs.

Once again, you were betrayed by habit.

Luckily for you, Elizabeth’s phone rang a second later and she excused herself to answer it, saying it was the director of her new movie. You watched her go before you took a deep breath and ran your hands down your face. You stared at the screen of your computer for so long that Elizabeth was back before you even moved to go back to work.

When she sat across from you, it seemed she didn’t even remember the odd conversation you had a few minutes ago, and you weren’t sure you were glad.

[...]

“Excuse me,” you heard someone saying to your left and turned around out of instinct more than anything. You saw a nice looking girl, with a soft smile, dark hair, and dark eyes, looking at you and you waited for her to keep talking since you had no idea why she caught your attention. “I normally don’t do this, but I was looking at you and I thought… Well, maybe you could give me your number so we can grab a coffee someday.”

You felt your eyes widen and your mouth drop open in shock, but you wasted no time looking out for your girlfriend to see if she had heard this girl talking. Elizabeth was leaning against the counter looking at the menu while she tried to pick what she wanted to drink and didn’t seem to have paid any attention to that, so you sighed in relief and turned around to the girl again. You offered her a polite smile before taking a respectful step back.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I have a girlfriend.”

“That’s okay. I’m sorry to bother you.”

And, just like that, the girl was gone with her cheeks red and a shy smile. You shook your head and approached Elizabeth to look over her shoulder at the menu to pick up your order, but her voice made your entire body freeze.

“You keep turning heads whenever you walk, huh?”

Your heart started to race and your mind ran a mile per hour trying to come up with a reply, but then Elizabeth turned her head to look at you and she had an amused smile and bright green eyes filled with mischief, which made you quickly realize she was only teasing you. She wasn’t mad. She thought it was funny.

Not sure how you could reply to that, you simply rolled your eyes. “Pick your coffee. The line is already outside the door.”

She chuckled, looked away and started giving her order to the boy behind the counter. Meanwhile, you cursed yourself for having another panicked reaction. When you sat down to drink your coffee, Elizabeth started chatting about her most recent trip and you listened as much as your troubled mind allowed you to.

Eventually, after she took a break to sip at her coffee, you decided to address something that had been bothering you for a while now. “Lizzie, remember when I told you about my previous relationship?”

She frowned, but nodded. “Yes. You said it ended a couple of years ago.”

“Well, yes, but… I didn’t mention that it ended badly after a huge fight we had. One of the fights we had,” you told her. “We had many fights, actually.”

“Oh,” she breathed out, seemingly confused as to why you were telling her that.

“Yeah, she was… she was a bit jealous.” You sighed. “She would have flipped a table if someone hit on me like that.” You decided not to mention that a table would have been literally flipped if your ex-girlfriend was the one standing there. The relationship you had before Elizabeth wasn’t a good one, even if you stayed with your ex for almost eight years. Every once in a while, you were surprised to see how different things could be with Elizabeth.

“Well, you are a very beautiful woman,” Elizabeth said with a charming smile and a wink at you. “I can’t blame people for looking.”

And she looked so happy, so relaxed, so truthful saying that, that you didn’t have the heart to keep telling her about the things you lived before she came into your life. Instead, you also smiled and decided to brush it off. You would talk to your therapist again, you would keep working to heal some wounds that were still bleeding, and it would be fine.

It would be fine.

[...]

You were putting some clean clothes away when you felt two hands suddenly grabbing your waist and a yelled: “Gotcha!” right to your ear.

You were distracted, thinking about work and your chores, so you obviously weren’t expecting that. The yell that left your lips wasn’t a normal one. It wasn’t a surprised, playful one. It wasn’t one you could brush off with a laugh. No. You yelled like you were afraid for your life, dropping everything you had in your hands and shrinking away before you could stop yourself.

And then, because things weren’t already bad enough, you felt yourself slipping into a panic attack very fast. Your breath got hollow, your heart started to race, your vision blurred, and all you wished was to crawl to a corner and cry.

“Hey, hey, it’s me,” you heard Elizabeth saying, only then realizing it had been her who sneaked behind you. “Y/N, calm down, take a breath.”

You tried to. You really did. But your chest felt like there was a train on top of it and you were shaking so much that you almost missed the edge of the bed when you tried to sit on it. You barely felt Elizabeth’s hands guiding you, you certainly missed when she tried talking to you again, and you didn’t notice when she walked to the kitchen to grab you a cup of water before returning as fast as she could. She coaxed you to drink the water, then grabbed your hands and started asking you to name things you could see, things you could smell, things you could feel, and things you could hear, until your breathing started to calm down and you were able to look at her again.

“Are you okay?” She asked, her eyes filled with concern and guilt, and you couldn’t take that so you looked away.

“Yes,” you whispered.

“Are you sure?” You nodded, soon hearing a sigh from her. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I didn’t mean to scare you that much. I just… I saw you were distracted and I thought it would be fun to jump on you. I didn’t mean to…”

“It’s not your fault,” you told her with a sad smile.

It was sad because it really wasn’t her fault, but the one to blame for that wasn’t around. No, the person who made that to you was far away, living her life without traumas, without dealing with those moments of doubts and fears, acting as if she hadn’t ruined you forever. You were the one who stayed with all of that to deal with. You were the one with the scars, the wounds, the hurt. And you just lashed out at someone who had nothing to do with that.

“My love,” Elizabeth said in a gentle, concerned voice. Her hands were placed at your thighs, but she wasn’t moving them, afraid her touch might trigger something else. “Can you tell me what happened?”

You didn’t want to, not really. Because you knew things would change after you said something. You wouldn’t have Elizabeth playfully jumping on you. However, you knew you should tell her everything because it wasn’t fair to you to endure it all alone.

So you took a deep breath and patted the bed beside you so she would get up from where she was crouched on the floor. Elizabeth understood and quickly got up to sit beside you, reaching out to grab your hands as soon as she sat. You smiled a bit at that, although it soon disappeared as you thought about how to start that conversation.

“My ex-girlfriend…” You had to pause to swallow the lump that raised in your throat. “When we had that fight that led to our breakup, she… well, she pushed me really hard when I was doing the dishes. I hit my head against the cupboard. She started yelling into my face, calling me names and all of that because she thought I was cheating on her. Well, that was the night I decided to leave her, but… But so many things happened before that.” Your voice was barely a whisper at the end, but you felt Elizabeth squeezing your hand and giving you the strength to keep talking. “It was never physical before that, though I’m sure it would be a common thing if I stayed after that night. It was small things that I didn’t even realize at first, you know? She would look through my phone, so I always had to give her the password to access it or it would start a massive fight. Every time I had to change it, for whatever reason, she got so mad. So mad,” you added with a grimace. “She would make small comments about my weight and the way I looked just to make me sad. I know that’s why she did that. I would be having a good day, a day where I was happy, and she would say something just to see my smile go away.”

“Oh, baby,” Elizabeth whimpered and you wondered if she even noticed she said it out loud.

“I couldn’t go out with my friends without her and, even when we did go out with them, I had to stay next to her,” you continued. “If someone hit on me, she would yell at me, say it was my fault, that I was acting like a whore and that’s why people thought they could come to me. She was jealous of everything and everyone, it was a nightmare. I lost count of how many times we had a massive fight about nothing and she would just storm out and I would stay up all night wondering if she was okay, wondering if she was coming back or not.” You took another deep breath. You had been looking at your joined hands since you started talking, knowing you wouldn’t be able to say it all if you were looking at her. “We broke up over two years ago and I thought… I thought I would never enter another relationship again, but then I met you and I…” You opened and closed your mouth a couple of times, suddenly at a loss of words to express what you wanted. “I’m so lucky to have you in my life, Lizzie. You’re nothing like her. Nothing,” you repeated to make sure she would understand that. “But she left scars in me that just pop up sometimes.”

“Oh, baby,” Elizabeth said once you were done talking, now looking at her. It was clear she wanted to reach out to hug you but wasn’t sure if the gesture would be welcome, which made you even more sad. That’s what you were afraid of. That’s why you hadn’t said anything before. “I’m so, so sorry that you had to go through that.”

“Yes, well,” you smiled sadly. “It’s over. I left that place and never looked back.”

“You did,” she agreed with you. “You were so brave.”

“Now you know why I randomly gave you my password,” you tried to joke, but you couldn’t master enough humor to do so.

“How could I have not realized it before?” Elizabeth asked herself. “God, how didn’t I see it before?!”

“I didn’t tell you anything before,” you reminded. “And you had a lot on your plate already.”

“That’s not an excuse,” she insisted. “You’re my girlfriend, someone I deeply care for, someone I love. I should have paid more attention to those signals. Gosh, they’re so clear now that you said it.”

“Lizzie, that’s the thing,” you interrupted her. “Now that I told you, you know what to look for. You didn’t know before. I’m not going to apologize for not saying anything because I wasn’t ready to do so. I know it’s been two years, but it still pains me to remember some things.”

“You have nothing to apologize for.”

“Neither do you.” You looked at her with stern eyes. “You didn’t know.”

“You tried to tell me that day at the coffee shop,” she reminded with a frown. “You told me you guys used to fight, but I didn’t think…”

“Elizabeth, stop.” Your firm voice made her close her mouth and look at you with wide green eyes. “It happened, it can’t be changed. You know I go to therapy and I like to think I’m getting better and better every day, but it’s hard to break some habits, especially the bad ones. I’m telling you this now so you can understand some of my actions as well. I overreacted when you scared me, but I had a reason to. I freeze when you walk behind me when I’m on my phone, because I expect you to grab it from my hand. I might cry if you raise your voice while we discuss something, because I expect you to yell at me and walk away. I’m trying to be better, but you need to know that those things might happen along the way.”

“My love, I’m so proud that you told me this,” Elizabeth affirmed, suddenly bringing tears to your eyes. “And I’m so proud of you for leaving something that wasn’t good for you. I promise I will be more aware of those things. I won’t jump on you anymore, I won’t make any jokes that might make you uncomfortable. You just name it and I will do it. Whatever you need.”

You felt your heart full with the honesty you could see on her face and hear in her voice. Elizabeth seemed truly worried, truly willing to find ways to help you out, to make things easier for you, and you felt the lump in your throat again.

“I bet you weren’t expecting to end up with a mess like me,” you commented with a watery laugh.

However, Elizabeth shook her head vehemently. “Don’t say that. You’re not a mess. Do you remember when I told you I don’t like getting drunk or being around people who get drunk? I noticed that you never drank too much after that. You’re always in control to make me comfortable. That’s what I want to do for you. That’s what you deserve at the very least.”

“I love you,” you whispered since all the emotions running through you were making it hard to say anything else.

“I love you too, my love. And I promise you to be by your side as long as you want me to.”

“I hope you have the time, then,” you joked, already leaning in for a kiss. “Because I don’t want you to be anywhere else.”

[t1red-twilight]

OMG OMG can you do something with angst request #10 "i miss you. your side of the bed doesn’t even smell the same anymore" with peter :)))))) Ive been sad and need some angst to match the mood and who better to ask!!!

bereavement

summary: “i miss you. your side of the bed doesn’t even smell the same anymore.”

content/warnings: gn!reader, andrew!peter, angst, major character death, grief, descriptions of ptsd, disordered eating (if you squint)

notes: omg tysm!!! i GOTCHU girl (gender-neutral). i really really tried with this one, i hope you enjoy it. i hope you feel better, dear anon. this fic made me cry lol

word count: 1k

masterlist p. parker masterlist

you had had a grueling day at work. you hadn’t slept the night before; your head plagued with dreams and regrets that you would carry as long as you would live. everyone was bothering you in some shape or form, plus, you had forgotten your lunch.

all you wanted was peter. you opted to walk to his home instead of trying to bear the late night traffic.

when you saw him, your shoulders finally released the tension that they had been holding.

“hey, pete.” you sat down next to him. “you would not believe how hard work was today. a rude older lady harassed me about messing up one of her forms, even though she was the one that filled them out.” you slouched and looked at the ground.

the honks of busy city life filled your ears. the smell from the rain lingered. “i forgot my lunch again. i don’t have enough to eat out right now either, so i just didn’t have lunch. but that’s not a big deal.” stomach pains were something that you were becoming quite familiar with. inhaling deeply, you continued. “i canceled more plans. i know you don’t want me to, but i just want to spend any time i have, with you. I can’t bear to be further away from you.” the sound of him scolding you felt like whispers against your damp skin.

you reached up and wiped a lone tear from your cheek. smiling as wide as you could handle, you tried to ignore them.

“i want to move to somewhere quieter, but i could never leave you.” you fiddled with your fingers out of habit.

there was a pause. your ears rang. “you don’t ever have to worry about me leaving, okay? i promise. i’ll stay here as long as you need me too.”

you waited; your eyes trailed downward, head turned away. the street was still slick with the combination of the oil from the city mixed with the rain. your breathing was fitful now, tears soaking the neckline of your top.

“i miss you. your side of the bed doesn’t even smell the same anymore,” you choked out, your hands rubbing the sockets of your eyes. you scanned the graveyard before returning your gaze to where peter rested.

Peter’s headstone was simple; he never would have wanted something grandiose. you and may picked out a simple granite. it was more may’s choice than yours, you had been too hysterical to even cope with the fact that the funeral you were planning was his.

even through hysterics, it never really hit you that he was dead. not until he sunk in an urn into the earth.

he always insisted an urn, better for the environment. neither you or may could handle having him sit on your mantle. you both decided that it felt too dehumanizing.

his headstone read: Peter Benjamin Parker: Lover, Son, Hero.

“it’s not getting any easier. i still love you more than anything, peter. i’m not capable of loving someone else, i think.

“you’ve ruined me romantically.” you laughed at the thought. it was a joke, even though it rang truer and truer as each day passed.

“you are the highlight of my existence. good lord, peter. you mean so much to me. there is nothing that i wouldn’t do to see you again. or, at the very least get your pillow to smell normal again. it reeks of me.”

-

peter died in your arms.

you could not quite recall the turn of events completely, but you could very clearly remember what he had said to you last.

he stumbled into your apartment through the fire escape. it got blurry after he thudded onto the carpet.

there had been some criminal ransacking the city who had a particular vengeance for peter. every time peter went out, he came back worse and worse. the name of the scum that killed him laid dormant somewhere in your mind. you refused to even think about him, as far as you were concerned, he was beneath you.

you had known that peter’s crime fighting could result in something serious, but pete had always insisted that everything was going to end up all right.

“i got him,” he had said. you ran over to help him. everything you remembered was from the third person, like you were watching yourself from above. you couldn’t recollect anything you said in response. “finally you’ll be safe from-”

from this point everything was crystal clear. you could name the shampoo still faintly straggled in his hair. it was your shampoo; now tarnished with the intense irony scent of blood that congested the throngs of your shared bedroom.

“peter, we have got to call an ambulance.” you were getting frantic. you tried as hard as you could to hoist him up, but he resisted. his arms rested atop your shoulders as you tried and tried to lift him up.

“it’s my time, love, it’s-”

“no. just let me get you to the hospital. if you hold on just a little bit longer, we can get you fixed up, okay?”

he inhaled like he was going to say something. his forehead fell to your shoulder.

“honey?” you shook him. “peter?”

“pete? peter?” you hand moved to his scalp. you tried to thread your fingers through his hair to no avail. the matting from his blood halted you fingers as soon as you began.

“c’mon, darling. stay awake, okay?”

“peter?”

your screech was pathetic as he laid limply in your arms. his chest was concave and his left foot had been barely hanging on.

-

you changed your shampoo after that; the smell of it only ever brought you that night. whenever you closed your eyes, you saw visions of peter. you could not decide which was worse: the memories where he was happy, or the play-by-play of his soul shrinking away from yours.

nights were now filled with television reruns, your ceiling, anything that could keep you awake occupied your time. when you were asleep you could be with him again. but, you never wanted to wake up. the hollow throbbing pains of having him ripped away from you again when you woke made you an insomniac.

you doomed yourself to repeat this cycle. it was as if you ever managed to get over peter, you’d lose everything that you had of him. so, you clung to every crumb that remained. even though those crumbs were slipping through your fingers like sand and disappearing with time as days passed.

[selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs]

Hello, I really enjoy your bungo self aware series. It has really helped me cope with everything. I was not sure where to put it and I was afraid to request. Because I sent one in your messages. About the port mafia flags taking care of the reader that experiences painful flashbacks from ptsd. To the point where it's hard for them to function with basic things. And goes into their head that they could've done this or that to prevent further harm and scrutiny.

Few words

Self-Aware! Platonic! Flags x Fem! Teen! Reader

Description: Few words made your mind wonder. Flags are here to make sure, that you are fine.

Warning: English is my second language. Mentions of abuse and scumming.

_______

You have been feeling groggy since morning. While, you don't have nightmares that night, the dream you had was unpleasant. It worsens your mood quite a bit. You tried to keep a smile on your face, but others quickly saw through your efforts.

The moment you sat down at the dinner table, Chuuya put a plate with double portion of a breakfast, Albatross was telling jokes, while driving you and BSD Teens and Kids at school, and during lunch break, Teruko was telling stories about Hunting Dogs missions, that you liked so much.

You could swear, that you started feeling better. You were sure, that at the evening you won't feel the shroud of morning sadness.

Well, as Fyodor liked to say "Не говори гоп, пока не перепрыгнешь"(1)

_______________

Today you supposed to go home early. Your class won a competition, and, as reward, you got a short day. Just few minutes before you can go home. Just last few encouraging words from your teacher.

"I never doubted you. After all, students from our school supposed to be perfect!" smile on their face was genuine. They believed, in what they were saying.

"Enjoy your weekends, kids! And, don't tell anyone, that I let you go earlier. It will be our little secret."

Your classmates started to pack their bags. You, on the other hand, froze.

'supposed to be perfect' 'don't tell anyone' 'little secret'

...this word...

"[Y/N], are you okay?" Karma looked concerned. "You have been staring before you, hardly blinking."

You nodded, and quickly put textbooks in your bag.

"We... we should go."

You mumble. You want to go home. You need to focus on going home. On today.

You, Karma and the rest of your housemates/friends/siblings leave the school.

You, Karma and the rest of your housemates/friends/siblings get into the van, saying 'hello' to Albatross, who was driving today.

You tried to focus on current moment.

But 'supposed to be perfect' and 'don't tell anyone' echoed in your head.

And you were silent all the way home.

______________________

Albatross can't help, but sneaking glances at you in the back view mirror.

You were quiet. Your gaze was dull. You looked tense. You looked much worse, than you looked in the morning.

And Albatross knew, what was going on with you.

He and others should prepare.

He managed to send a message to the rest of the Flags, when van got in a small traffic jam.

Today you will need them.

And you will need to be reminded, that you are safe.

And that you are loved.

He and the rest of BSD Cast loved you. You were their daughter/granddaughter/niece/sister.

He and the rest of BSD Cast were neutral about other people.

He and the rest of BSD Cast despised that creatures, that did that to you.

______________________

When you came home, you ignored others and immediately get into your room. You wanted to lay down, to spend some time alone.

Until that annoying echoes of 'supposed to be perfect' and 'don't tell anyone' stop ringing in your ears.

Meanwhile, Flags was preparing. They brought everything they need and were waiting outside your room.

They value your privacy. Sometimes, you need just some solitude and silence.

But they can't let you be always alone. When you were like this, you tend to ignore yourself. Skipped breakfast, lunches, do half job in brushing your hair or teeth. You need people, who took care of you and supports you.

Doing the job, that they failed to do. Who willingly choose to abandon their work.

And, while you have your doubts, you were s strong person. Flags knew that.

But, even strongest people need help. Need love. Need cheering up.

But, for now, they will wait.

____________

You didn't get any sleep.

Your head hurts.

Your hair was a mess.

You slowly stand up from the bed. On stiff legs, you approached your dressing table. You plopped on the chair before it.

You grab hairbrush.

And looked in a mirror.

Messed up hair. Bags under eyes.

And yells of 'You were supposed to be perfect! Why can't you be a normal child?! Why are you so terrible?! Useless! Helpless!'

Your grip on the hairbrush was too strong, your knuckles became white.

sounds of hits rang in your ears

'You were supposed to braid your hair! It is not a braid!'

your scalp was on fire. with every tug of your hair, pain became stronger and stronger. they don't care, that you didn't know, how to do it. you were supposed to be perfect. perfection supped to knew everything without people teaching them 'how'. perfection supposed to know better and not believe scammers. only perfect thing you can do was staying silent and not telling anyone about your home life. or you would face consequences.

You sobbed. And that sob let you return to reality.

You felt, that you weren't alone in the room.

But you can't focus on that someone.

You felt, like you were surrounded by a thick, hard as stone darkness. You tried to focus on something else. On a carpet under your feet, on a chair you were sitting on, on the air, that was surrounding you. On anything, that will freeze you, let you stay there, and not let your mind flow further down the memory river.

Yet, you can't focus on anything. It was hard. Extremely hard. But you tried again and again.

Something warm touched your hands, making you let go of the brush. Warm hands gave your palms another soft squeeze. After this soft gesture, the darkness moved back. Someone started making circling motions with his thumb, giving your hands a little massage. With every circle, darkness creeps away from you.

You finally could focus on the person, who was holding your hands. The sight of the familiar warm smile on Lippmann's face makes darkness moved back again.

"There, Dear, everything is fine. You are safe." Lippmann's voice was soft and warm. "Nothing bad will happen to you."

You continue staring at your hands, while Lippmann squeezed them again.

"You are safe. No one will ever hurt you." His words make you felt like you were covered with a warm blanket. Another pair of hands was put on the top of your head, and fingers started to go through your hair, untangling knots. Pianoman whispered, while gently untangling the knots.

"Let us take care of you, dear. Don't worry about anything, young lady."

You stay silent. You don't know what to say.

You saw Doc with the corner of your eye. He was pouring water from the bottle in a cup.

Soon, he stands next to Lippmann, holding a cup towards you. There was a straw in the cup.

"Here, drink this, [Y/N]" Doc's eyes were warm and full of concern.

You started to drink through the straw

Lippmann's hands were still squeezing yours.

Pianoman, who picked up the hairbrush from the floor, was now brushing your hair.

Doc was still holding the cup with one hand. He put a second hand on your shoulder.

"Here. Here. Don't rush. Small sips. Good. You are doing great. Now, breath in. Hold it. Breathe out. In. Hold it. Out. In. Hold. Out. You are doing great. You are doing great."

Water was drunken. Your breathing calmed down. You felt empty, but, at least, nothing was howling in your head and darkness wasn't circling around you.

The door of the ensuite bathroom opened. Iceman and Albatross stepped into the room.

"Bath is ready, [Y/N]. Do you want to take it now?"

You slowly nodded. Iceman asked the next question.

"Need help?" You shook your head. You were sure, that you can take a bath on your own.

Flags quickly left the room, giving you privacy. You took a change of clothes and went to the bathroom.

___________

Scented oils in the warm water, bubbles, a cup of your favorite beverage did a good job in making tension go away. You just focused on the scent and warmth, not thinking about anything.

After you finished with your bath, you put on your pajamas, a fluffy bathrobe, that Albatross put there earlier, put a towel over your wet hair, and return to your room.

__________

Flags wasn't done with taking care of you yet.

You were sitting on Iceman's lap with your legs in a big bowl full of warm water. Doc was kneeling before you, giving you a foot massage.

Lippmann and Pianoman were sitting on the floor, on the left from Doc, while Albatross was sitting on his right.

The room was silent. Until Albatross spoke.

"Hey, [Y/N], want to hear about the dream I had?" He waited until you nodded, and continue. "Let me tell you, I had a crazy dream last night! I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda!"

Albatross sighed, before grinning.

"Do bad, that it was just a Fanta sea."

You quietly huffed. You don't know if it was a good pun, or so bad it's good pun. Albatross continues.

"Also, earlier today, some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped! It was otter chaos!"

You giggled. A small smile appeared on your face. Albatross, encouraged, continue telling you puns.

At the end, you and Albatross were laughing. When you two calmed down, you felt courage, that you need to speak.

"I... I am sorry for being a mess today. I am sorry for making you took care of me. I just... I just want someone to care..." You bit your lip. "If only I spoke sooner... You won't get such a mess that I am. I won't be a burden."

You didn't have a chance to react, before you got in a middle of a group hug.

"Don't apologize. You didn't do anything wrong. You are our dear niece. You are our family. You aren't a burden." Pianoman carefully pat your head.

"Don't be ashamed of your emotions. They are valid. You deserve to be heard. You deserve to be loved." Doc squeeze your right shoulder.

"Came to us even with the smallest things to ask for. We will take care of you." Albatross squeezed your right hand.

"We will move forward together. We will take as many small steps as you need and want. You won't be alone. You will never be on your own." Lippmann squeezed your left shoulder.

"You have power. You can choose. We will support you." Iceman carefully squeezed your left hand.

"We love you, our dear niece."

_______

You went to sleep with happy tears on your cheeks. You asked, and they listened. Flags stayed in your room. To make sure, that you don't have nightmares.

No matter what awaits their family, Flags were sure in one thing.

________

All of them will be here for you.

(1)Rus. Idiom. Similar meaning to "don't halloo till you are out of the woods"

(2) Puns were found there

[bigtreefest]

Chapter 9: Looking Over Fences

From: You Catch More Bees With Honey Series

Pairing: Mob! Bucky x Farmer! Reader

Summary: Things may seem alright on the other side of the fence if you’re not consciously looking at it, but both sides are on the struggle currently

Word count: 2,268

Content/warnings: Mentions/allusions to self harm that are a poor joke, mob themes, mentions of blood, mentions of death, threats, annoyance, pushy behavior and lowkey misogyny, possibly a very bad decision, Peter being a sweet lil brother essentially

Author’s Note: This is lined up so the phone call she makes at the end would occur in Ch. 5 of The Rainmaker

I hope you guys are liking this AU, and I’d love to hear all your thoughts. Comments, reblogs, and asks are greatly appreciated!

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

< Prev | Series Masterlist | Next >

The following week since Bucky had left the farm was…okay. It was fine. And to be honest, you didn’t really care for much that was going on outside your own bubble. You fielded the occasional call or text from Steve or Decks, never from Bucky, trying to make it seem like everything was okay, but that was pretty much it.

Peter was helpful, monitoring shipments that started to come in, but more so, you could feel the way he was monitoring you. Perhaps to make sure you didn’t jump off one of the bridges you’d helped to design in town. But what did that matter? They were like ten feet off the riverbed anyway. And it’s not like you were faring that poorly. You were just a little sad, but not enough for it to affect you, but the people closest to you in your life thought differently than that. And by closest, right now you meant physical proximity: Peter and Curtis.

Everywhere you went, if you turned around and squinted enough, you could still see Peter in a distant corner. He definitely needed to work or his stealth skills, or perhaps he was purposely making sure you could see him, letting you know you didn’t have to be alone. That was too bad, though, because that was all that you wanted. To be left alone and sulk and just do your work like the good farmer you are.

So you did, and tried to ignore your shadow figure following you around in jeans and a shirt you’d made Curtis bring him from the store in town. He was just so tiny that he was swimming in everything else you had for the boys, and you weren’t really sure if he would want your old, nasty clothes. The ones you were hardly wearing anymore after your got back late at night, in favor of the only thing Bucky had left behind: a single Henley.

But really, it was fine. It was okay, and you were going to be fine. If only Curtis would stop asking! You could handle everything on your own, just like you had before. That’s what mattered, right? The only one you could really rely on was yourself, and no one needed to see how much pain you were actually in besides him. The one who got to be so happy with his sweet girl while you were separated, independent, alone. Any time you made a snide comment about it outside the soft likeness you were known for prior to these mood swings, Curtis simply let it roll off his back, giving you a tight hug, and moving on, avoiding the subject once again.

Bucky was miserable. Just like you, he threw himself into work to try and ignore the pain. He needed someone around, though. Struggling alone wasn’t as easy as it used to be, so he searched for help. What the hell was this attempt at a healthy coping mechanism? One that landed him in the apartment of your best friend, no less.

Bucky had tried to find Steve upon his return, the second in command still working double time, plus essentially a new part-time job of flirting. Steve didn’t say it, but Bucky could see it. Plus, he got an earful from Sam about their developing situation in the debrief of preparation for coming back to work. Good for Steve, not relatable. The only chance he could get to find his elusive best friend was to track down his car and jump in. So after Steve had picked up snacks for what appeared to be a movie date, Bucky snuck into the trunk to hide. Any attention, or just human presence, especially that of someone you seemed to enjoy so much would work.

Bucky was exhausted. His nights were sleepless again, but now for different reasons. He couldn’t sleep without you. He didn’t want to sleep without you. But his body didn’t get the message as he was pulled under by the gentle rocking of Steve’s SUV.

He woke up to the familiar, gentle voice in his place amongst the grocery bags. He couldn’t believe he’d fallen asleep in such an uncomfortable suit. It was one of his trash suits: one of the scratchy ones, one of the ones he didn’t care if it got a little bloody. To be honest, he didn’t care right now. Who did he have to impress? This was the first time he’d been out of the house in a week. But this was better than no clothes, and why waste something designer when no one was important around to see it? This mindset was completely different than two months ago.

Bucky groaned and sat up from the trunk, telling Steve his true feelings, something rarely voiced, so who was Steve to turn away from that vulnerability? Bucky really just needed someone, and even though Steve really wanted this private time with Decks, his best friend needed him more. In response to Bucky’s request to joint them, Steve’s lips formed a tight line and his nostrils flared with a frustrated, but sympathetic huff.

“Fine. Come on upstairs.”

The time with Decks and Steve really helped Bucky, even though he could tell he was very evidently interrupting something. Once the movie was over and Decks was asleep, Bucky checked his phone to see a new message: another employee dead.

As the weeks went on, employee deaths had been on the rise with even a few occurring at first when he was at the farm. It initially seemed like weird chance events. A missing employee here and there, unfortunately, was normal when you owned so much of the city. They would usually turn up again, but this time it was different. Employees were dying, both innocent and mob-associated alike. This was targeted, and he knew exactly who was doing it: Lloyd. He was closing in on business, looking to intimidate. This was going to fill Bucky’s time well, combined rage from these slaps in the face, as well as the constant berating you were starting to face from Cole (as Peter had reported), working as fuel to the fire of reclaiming his rule over the city.

Not only did business suck, but if someone asked Steve and Sam, they’d say their boss was a menace to society, and not in the good way. He was running himself, and them by proxy, into the ground. Nothing was ever enough for him, and they were catching the brunt of that. Maybe there was a way to fix it, but what was coming wasn’t quite what they had in mind. With all the shit going on in the city, they hoped things were better for you.

You had no idea what Bucky was going through besides the small things that Peter updated you on, but you hope it wasn’t as bad as having to put on a fake smile for an annoying, fake farmer.

It was as if Cole was consciously waiting for Bucky to leave your farm for him to start coming around again. It was like clockwork, with a gift from him earlier in the week, followed by an in-person sometime visit in the second half. It was like he was hoping to find you to more vulnerable like this. If that was the metric he was going on, though, he was severely underestimating your abilities. Bucky had been gone for three weeks, and Cole seemed unrelenting.

At least your rage at his persistence gave you something to fill your days with. And Peter was a delightful gossip, making impressions of the clumsy and pushy ‘farmer.’

You didn’t really have the desire to keep any of the gifts you were receiving but the cow, though, which was quickly growing, ready soon to move into her shed out back. First, it was the little things, like her, but then things started getting bigger. A Turner’s drink fridge. Where was that supposed to go? Then a hydroponics tower. That…well, actually, that one was kinda nice. Those things were expensive, and you hadn’t gotten the chance to invest in them yet. But what could a singular one possibly do for you? And then a tractor. One not even graded for the type of work you had to do. Each gift was punctuated by him forcing his way into your house right at dinner time, and sitting with you and Peter until you could shove him out, polite as ever.

His last visit, though. That one was a little bit different. You could see the smug look on his face as he ate off your cutlery. It was an insult that the plates and utensils your family, and Bucky, once used were touching his mouth. You’d purposely set those ones aside, reused for only him each time, and marked them mentally to be blown up once this all blew over. You were sure Peter would enjoy that, too. And hopefully it was sooner rather than later, but until then, it was one dinner at a time.

You walked Cole out to the porch, like you did every time, but instead of walking straight out to his truck, this time, he lingered for a second, turning around and looking down at you.

“Listen up, Sweet Peach. Sure, my capacities right now, every time I visit you, are limited, but I’ve got friends in low places. I’m not gonna give up. Either you give me the farm, or my buddy Lloyd starts a war with your boyfriend.”

A threat like that made you lose your usually cool demeanor for a second. “Cole, absolutely not!” This came out of nowhere.

You had to find a way to hit his pride. Maybe that could cause him to back down without retaliation. “What’s the valor in me handing it over, anyway? It would be worth so much more if you earned it. I know you’ve got something to prove, just like in high school.”

You did your best not to cringe at the memory. You obviously didn’t care about back then and it still pained you to think of it. Living in the past wasn’t something you did, but it was very evidently something he was caught up on. “Work to earn my farm, maybe you’ll earn my respect…and possibly a little something else.”

You bit your lip trying to be suggestive. Ugh, this was humiliating, but his entire manner of carrying himself shifted from his poor attempt at intimidation to intrigue. After all these years he still couldn’t help himself trying to win you over, and he was still a doofus.

“Oh yeah? And how do you suppose I do that?”

You tapped your bottom lip with your pointer finger, humming. “Mmm, how about a wager? Winner takes all, or at least just my farm. I win, Lloyd doesn’t wage war, either. Deal?”

“Wait, wait. A wager on what?” He licked his lips, still giving you a look that made you sick to your stomach.

“How about a game of pool? And tell you what, I’ll be extra nice since you’ve never seen me play and I just want to make sure we’re even.” You said it in your sweetest tone, a pout on your lips and your eyes as wide and sparkling as a doe. “You can pick who plays for your side, but here are the ground rules: no professional players. No pre-professional, either. Friends, allies, and acquaintances only. Keep the playing field even. But, the caveat is that I get to do the same. Whichever side wins the game, wins the prize. Do we have a deal?”

Cole stood there for a second, nodding and thinking it over. “So you’re trying to win my compliance? Didn’t think you were the type to treat your livelihood like a game, but lucky for you, I am.”

It’s true, you hate that it had to come to this, but you held out your hand for him to shake, just for him to limply grab it. How he got this far in business, you’ll never know, because that handshake was terrible, yet binding for the young-ish heir. Oh wait, that’s right, he got this far because his parents did it for him. Bucky would never let that handshake fly, but maybe he would understand. This was a threat facing both of you, and according to the breadcrumbs you’d heard from Peter, it could be even worse on Bucky’s end. That, on top of what Cole said about waging war added to your concern.

“Deal.” Cole dropped your hand and you tucked it behind you back, ready to wash it as soon as you could get inside.

“Good. Now get off my property. I’ll meet you at the bar next week. Saturday. 6pm.”

He nodded with a wink and walked down the porch steps to his lifted truck, tripping on the gravel on the way there, not daring to look back to catch your snicker. You could see his huff when he slid into the front seat, after having jumped up into the tall vehicle. The engine roared as he drove away, creating ruts. You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms as you walked back inside.

You heart was racing. The stakes were unbelievably high, but you didn’t have much of an option. Either win this bet and end it once and for all, or chance him trying to take things by force. So it wasn’t really much of a choice at all when you laid it out.

You had a few phone calls to make…

Next >

Bonus A/N: The grass is always greener, but it looks like both Bucky and Bee are standing on dead lawns.

Taglist: @mrsnikstan @scuzmunkie @openup-yourmind @vicmc624 @multifandomreader73 @hawkeyes-queen @blackhawkfanatic @morgthemagpie @buckybarnessimpp @calwitch @thesarcasmqueen-22 @ronearoundblindly

[mirage-aera]

•°. *࿐ Five stages of grief | TF141 + König + Keegan

ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ : Reflections - The Neighbourhood

Synopsis: How the boys will cope with your death after a mission gone wrong following the five stages of grief, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.

Word count: 2.099

Masterlist

Inspired by an acting challenge @ simplyagh0st has created on tiktok, check him out he does great content if you haven't!

"falling just as hard, I'd rather lose somebody than use somebody"

Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley has gone through so much hurt already. He promised himself that he wouldn’t let anyone close to his heart,  and just rip it out again. But once you came along and managed to tear down his walls, he made a vow to himself to keep you safe, to make sure he doesn’t have to go through loss, again. 

During the mission, your position gets overwhelmed by enemies. Backup is only a couple of minutes away. The team is split up, you are together with Simon, fighting off waves of enemies. Simon has unknowingly turned his back on an enemy while trying to help you. You’re his priority and he discards his own safety. You see the barrel of the gun facing his back. Not saying a word, you run up to him and turn him around. Not expecting the movement, he easily moves with you. Effectively swapping places with you. The shot rings out and pierces you through the heart. You start collapsing to the floor. He manages to catch you before you meet the ground. He pulls his pistol out of the holster and shoots the enemy with no hesitation.

He sets your body down on the floor gently. Your backup arrives and helps Simon clear out the enemies. As he looks at the dead bodies around him, he can’t help but stare at you. He’s a seasoned soldier. He knows you are dead and that nothing can help you.

As days go on without you by his side, slowly his misery turns into anger. He hates the fact that you put yourself in front of a bullet that was meant for him. He hates the fact that he failed to protect you. He hates that he got so distracted with keeping enemies away from you that he failed to notice the enemy pointing a gun at him. He hates that he let his walls down again, and let someone break his heart again. He gets colder by the day, not giving a damn for anyone or anything. He’s on a mission, to kill every single person involved in that mission that’s on the other side of your guns. He may have failed in protecting you, but he’ll be damned if he fails at this too.

"I see my reflection in your eyes.."

John ‘Soap’ MacTavish can’t believe how much of a fuck up he is. He promised you, that whenever you are around him. He’ll keep you safe. No matter what. So when he sees your empty eyes staring up at him. He can’t help but feel so guilty. He’s used to seeing his reflection in your eyes. Eyes that were so full of life, and now they’re lifeless. All because he broke his promise to you. He just stares at your body in shock. One second you were fine, even joking around with him. The next second you’re gone and he failed to protect you.

They had to drag him off of your dead body. When they put a white sheet over you, that’s when he finally stopped fighting. He had no other choice than to accept you’re dead. He wouldn’t leave your side. Even at death. He’s locked himself up in his room after getting discharged. Price said he’s a liability and that he should take some time off. But really all it did was shut him off even more. He feels so alone in your shared bedroom. Once full of laughter are now fleeting memories. He spends his day in bed, reminiscing and crying. He wants to be angry, he wants to avenge you. But he’s just so goddamn tired. His reflection staring back at him through your lifeless eyes will forever haunt him.

The only time he leaves the house is to visit you. Even then, your cheerful Johnny is no more. He just stares at your tombstone in sadness, remorse, and regret. He thinks about all of the what-ifs. He knows you would hate to see him like this, but he feels like he has no other option. His light was and always will be you. Someone has taken his light away, and the tunnel is now a dark and lonely one

"we were too close to the stars, I never knew somebody like you"

Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick has never expected the mission to go so awry. If anything, it was supposed to be one of the easier missions that the Task Force had to endure. So when he stares at you, lying limp on the cold hard ground. One thought is speeding through his mind. ‘No no no, she’s not dead. She can’t be dead.” Even though the signs are there, you are clinically dead. You aren’t breathing, heart stopped pumping the instant the explosion went off. Eyes staring blankly up at the sky. He rushes to you and reassures you as if you’re still alive.

“Hey, hey just keep your eyes open baby. Help is on the way.”

“You’ll be okay, you’re stronger than them.”

“Just hold on, you’re fine baby. It’s just a bruise.”

He repeats these things, both to you and him. As long as he can reassure himself that you are okay and still ‘alive’, everything will be alright. Despite the blood staining his clothes and covering his hands. He refuses to believe you are dead. Not when you are one of the most important people in his life if not the most important. You’re supposed to grow old and die together. Not abruptly by an explosion, not on the job. He has never met someone like you, someone so caring and kind-hearted. You’re a special one and he knows it.

Even as the medics put you on a stretcher and placed a white sheet over your body. Even when they pronounced you dead. He refuses to listen to them. Even when your casket gets lowered into the ground as they give you an honorary send-off. When they forced him to attend your funeral so that he won't regret it later. He still believes you are alive. Sometimes he can hear you call out to him, telling him you love him and that he should move on from you. On a few rare occasions, he swears he sees you standing before him. Or amongst the team on a briefing. And when he informs the team that you have returned, they just stare at him in pity. And repeat what they have been saying for weeks. “She’s dead and isn’t coming back.”

"(tell me you see it too..)"

John Price is a seasoned soldier. He has seen many things, things that he’d rather have not seen. But to keep the world clean, someone has to get their hands dirty. During his whole military, he has seen many comrades die, good people that didn’t deserve to die. Once he became captain he made sure that every one of his fallen brothers and sisters would get a proper and honorable send-off.

You are not an exception. Once he got the news that you’ve been KIA’d. His whole world stopped before it started turning again. His team needs him to be level-headed, not an emotional wreck. He can let his emotions out later in private. They retrieve your body from the field and bring it home. As you lay in the chopper, lifeless. He stares at you both in sadness and frustration. He knows you aren’t coming back. He’s frustrated that he couldn’t save you. Your eyes are still open, staring blankly back at him. He sighs as he closes your eyes, not bearing to see his reflection in your eyes. A reminder that he failed you, both as a partner and captain.

He was there during every step of the send-off. He made sure everything was perfect and that nothing could go wrong. You deserve to rest in peace. As the casket goes down, he can’t help but feel slightly peaceful as he watches you get lowered. He’s there until midnight, talking endlessly with your tombstone. Until he’s forced to leave you, so he can prepare for his next mission. Dealing with the bastards, and everyone involved that took you from him.

‘At least she’s free from the horrors of this world.’ He thinks to himself. From now on, he’ll strive to keep the world clean. So that you can forever lay one with the earth in peace. It’s the least he could do for you now that you can’t do it yourself. Maybe one day he’ll join you. But for now he’s content with the fact you no longer have to suffer.

"maybe it's a blessing in disguise?"

König has been spiralling since that mission, the mission where you did not return like you said you would. He regrets sending you on that mission for KorTac. He unknowingly sent you on a suicide mission. The worst part is, they never found your body. It makes him sick to think about what happened to it. He hates the way he can’t even put you to proper rest, where you want to be buried if something were to happen. He rereads the mission file over and over. He thinks that maybe, just maybe, he could’ve seen it coming from a mile away and perhaps he could’ve warned you. But the times he rereads it he realizes that there was nothing that could’ve been done for you. Every outcome would’ve likely ended with you dying. It revolts him to think he sent you to your death.

Your shared home feels so cold and lonely without your presence. He takes care of the garden for you, he waters your indoor plants. You always made him a fruit salad while he worked in his office. So he does it himself. But instead of using his favourite fruits, he makes them with your favourite. Hoping that one day, you’ll come home and join him, sharing a fruit salad together as you used to do. He heads to the cemetery daily, where your empty casket is buried. Sometimes, he’ll come with a small bowl of fruit salad. 

“I’ve got your favourites, meine Taube.” 

“Bitte, come home. Your plants miss you, I can’t take care of them as well as you do.”

“I wish I never sent you on that verdammt mission.”

As he speaks softly to your tombstone, a white dove perches on top of it. He looks at it as it reminds him of you. He watches as the dove takes your favourite fruits from the bowl and eats it. Eventually, it picks up the pieces of his favourite fruit and drops them on his hand. He chuckles lightly, “welcome home, Liebe.”

"falling just as hard, I'd rather lose somebody than use somebody"

Keegan Russ was already torn with the death of Ajax. But when Rorke did the same to you. His whole world crumbled. When they found out Rorke had a kill list for the Ghosts. He made a vow to himself to keep you safe, no matter what. So when Rorke captured you, he was furious. But he still had confidence in getting you back home to him. He was so close, yet so far. He realizes it’s a repeat of what happened to Ajax. That just spurred him on more to get you back faster.

But when he came face to face with Rorke. He spots your limp body behind Rorke. Oh, he so wanted to wipe that smirk off of his face, but his priority is you first and foremost. “What did you do?!” Keegan screams out in rage. When that smirk got wider, he was so tempted to put a bullet in between his eyes right there and then. “I crossed off a name on the list.” All Keegan sees is red. Rorke throws your lifeless to him.

Keegan catches your body and slumps to the floor. Rorke sees this as an opportunity to escape, and right now Keegan doesn’t give a shit. He clutches your body closer to him. Hating the way your cold skin touches him. Hating all the dried-up blood and bruises. You suffered, and he couldn’t help you. He screams in both rage and agony. He gently puts you down before trashing the room you were held in. He throws things left and right. He tears down papers from the walls.

At your funeral, he wasn’t any better. If anything, his body was running on pure adrenaline and rage. Once he gets his hand on Rorke. He will show him the wrath that he has bestowed upon him. He can’t help but continuously for not being there to protect you. He stares at your tombstone in anger. ‘How did I let you slip through my fingers?’ That is all he can think about. You were gone, because he was too late. That thought will forever linger in the back of his mind.

[0lliecl0wn]

PUNCH OUT HEADCANONS: Clueless Friends Edition

so i showed my friends the punch out cast and asked them to make up headcanons for them (they have never seen nor heard of punch out outside of me rambling to them about it)

so uh

here it is

GLASS JOE

-Wet the bed as a kid

-Probably still does it

-Denys it

-Goes honk shoo honk shoo when he sleeps

-Had a mullet in middle school

-Has to draw on his eyebrows

-Mouth Breather™

-Wears a cap and nightgown and holds a candle at night

-Can’t swim

VON KAISER

-Bartender

-Screams into his pillow at night

-Screams like a little girl

-Wore light-up Sketchers in middle school

-Got bullied for it

-Goes to the gym to cope

-Fucking YEETS the dumbells

-Flexes on people (also to cope)

-If he is told to sleep on the couch, he will sadly sulk there like a emo person (cue sad hamster music)

DISCO KID

-Babygirl

-Zesty

-Took ballet/gymnastics

-Optimist

-Accidentally broke a trampoline

-Was the popular kid in school

-THE sweetest guy

-Cat person

-Owns 4 cats

-Wears fluffy robes

KING HIPPO

-Plays League of Legends

-Tweaks out HARD at Angry Birds and Super Mario Wii (friend is totally not projecting)

-Really good at board games

-Gamer

-Patrick Star kinnie

-Does NOT cackle. He giggles

-Has Live Laugh Love framed over his toilet

-His snores have caused earthquakes

-Heavy sleeper

PISTON HONDO

-”He did WHAT in his Honda?!”

-Behaves like that one English teacher you had in middle school

-aka the ”Never in my 15 years of teaching have I seen a substitute report this bad” teacher

-ponders

-Dances to animation memes

-Worked at Burger King once

-Constantly pissed

-Goes honk mimimimi when he sleeps

-If he ate a cheeseburger he would explode

-Was the guy who made the post that just says “everytime a new chicken sandwich releases”

BEAR HUGGER

-Smells PUTRID

-Real name is Cleetus

-Lumberjack

-Has a lisp

-Gets food in his beard

-Eats it (EWWWW 🤢)

-His theme song is “Entry of the Gladiators” (aka clown music)

-Wouldn’t survive a day in the military

-Plays Microsoft Flight Simulator

-Goes “weeeeee!” as the plane flies

-Has a poster that says “Eat Slur Game Repeat”

-Redneck

-Has a shirt that says ”These Fists Are Rated E for Everyone”

GREAT TIGER

-HOT

-Has the most beautiful hair but hides it

-Binged My Little Pony

-Binged Twilight

-Plays with Barbie dolls

-Listens to Kpop

-AMAZING at Just Dance

-Also good at DDR

-Plays Pikmin

-Loves the Stone Pikmin

DON FLAMENCO

-Once got addicted to cough drops

-Uses really bad pick up lines

-Does really bad trickshots to impress girls

-Slips like a cartoon character. His shoes go flying every time

-Watched MLP with Great Tiger

-Watches Mean Girls

-Kins Regina George

-Cried when she got hit by a bus

-Zesty

-Scoliosis

-Can pick my friend up with one hand

-Would lean on a wall, say “hey cutie, you free tonight?” and immediately have a coughing fit

-Took an Am I Gay? Quiz. It said yes and refuses to believe it (internalized biphobia)

-Likes big butts and he cannot lie

ARAN RYAN

-Menace

-Actually very lightweight, refuses to admit it

-Bullies kids on ROBLOX

-Keeps getting censored in chat

-Plays Dress to Impress

-Would hit you if so desired

-Uses Joker quotes

-Bakes pink cupcake in spare time

-Would make a balloon animal for a kid and then pop it like Gru

-The guy he tickled in his character intro was Don Flamenco

-Killed someone, steals, graffitis, takes candy from babies

-Should be in jail

-ADHD

-”Ya prob’ly got cheeseburgers in those gloves, have ya Mac?!” “well you have horseshoes”

SODA POPINSKI

-Dropped on the head as a kid

-Nicknamed ”Pinhead Larry”

-Oiled up

-Naturally loud

-Skipped leg day

-Mr. Krabs walking sound when he tiptoes

-Speedruns Hello Neighbor

-Hands are too big for the keyboard

-Makes dad jokes and laughs at himself because no one else laughs

-Gets bullied by Aran Ryan for his dad jokes

BALD BULL

-Someone threw a bowling ball at his head

-Peak Male Performance

-40% chip (context for this is in comments)

-Watched game shows, was in one once

-Blurts out the answers at the TV, gets pissed every time they get it wrong and screams

-Screams like the ash baby

-Shakes randomly

-Ate lead paint

-Ate a glow stick

-”ladies, ladies, calm down, theres enough of me to go around” (stolen from don flamenco, difference is this actually works)

-ash baby coded???

-Teeters on the line of being ugly and hot

-Gets beauty sleep

-20 step skincare routine

SUPER MACHO MAN

-”he looks like a founding father”

-Shrimp posture

-UGLY??

-Listens to phonk unironically

-Has jiggle physics

-Uses his chest to type on keyboards

-says “eureka!” when he as an idea

-FAKE chain

-wears speedos (canon)

-its his only outfit

-played five nights at freddys and shit himself

-Pimp

-GILF

-Looks 72, is 27

MR. SANDMAN

-Drag Queen

-Chappell Roan listener

-Once tried to wax his nose but got q tips stuck in it

-REALLY into horoscopes and gemstones

-NAPALMED a homeless shelter

-Dances like the dame tu cosita guy

-fucken BUSTS IT DOWN to every song

-Throws gang signs in his boxing gloves??

-Does the Omni-Man squat sometimes

-Ate a lightbulb and that's why his skin glows

-Skips to the song “Mr. Sandman” because he’s babygirl like that

LITTLE MAC

-Floats in the air when he smells pie

-Anime protagonist

-Loves Ben 10

-Had a greasy mohawk

-Ate a bug

-Sticks his head out of the car window

-Gulps and goes “EEEYIKES!!!” when he has to fight a strong opponent

-Listens to Mitski

-Loves the movie Ratatouille

-His favorite character is Remy’s brother

-Makes kandi bracelets

-Asserts dominance by T-posing

DOC LOUIS

-Wears yoga pants

-Has asthma

-Runs up the stairs on all fours

-Maximum silly

-Watches romcoms and cries

-Draws watches on his wrist and looks at it when someone asks him for the time

-Watched Skibidi Toilet AND knows all of the lore

-Doesn’t know what a tampon is

-Listens to the song that goes “once I was seven years old”

-Mama’s boy

-HORRIBLE driver

[claiestve]

Things have been going really bad for me lately. Could you please make an Isaac comfort fic? The listener feels very gloomy and can't do anything. They often become very clingy to him feeling sad and just hugging him but he's working and gets annoyed so he kinda yells at them but he feels bad and comforts them later? I am sorry if this is too specific 😭

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐁𝐢𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐏𝐭. 𝟐 ꨄ Isaac

˜”* ❝𝙄 𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙠𝙞𝙨𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪.❞

⎯⎯ ୨ ୧ ⎯⎯

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: ɪꜱᴀᴀᴄ ᴅɪᴅɴ'ᴛ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀꜱᴛᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ

⎯୨⎯ " " ⎯୧⎯

“Hey.” You quickly made your presence known to Isaac before clinging onto him. He was working but made it known that he was okay with you coming in for whatever you needed. Ultimately, he didn’t mind at all. 

However, there was one thing that got under his skin. It seemed like the past few days, you’ve been acting off. You didn’t want to go anywhere or do anything, you never felt like talking or holding up conversation, and your attitude shifted overall. It was all so strange because you were still very physically attached to him and wanted to be around him more than usual, but he just couldn’t let it go. Isaac wanted to figure you out so badly. 

Now, you’re hugging the back of his neck while he researches. He attempted to start a conversation with you but your gloomy tone shut it down quickly. 

“Do you– um, need something, Pickle?” He made another attempt at conversing but you clearly didn’t want it. 

“No.” 

You buried your face into his hair, feeling a huge weight lift off your body. It felt relaxing to just be near him. Isaac was like an escape for you. At this moment, you didn’t have to think, you didn’t want to think. You just wanted to be with him. 

“Pickle, if there’s something wrong you know you can tell me, right?”

“Yeah.”

Your mindless replies started to frustrate him. He didn’t know why you were like this and why you didn’t tell him anything. He needed to know, but maybe that’s why you didn’t want to tell him. 

“Then why won’t you tell me?” His tone was more gentle than anything, even considering his frustration. 

“Because there’s nothing to tell.” 

Isaac leaned his head forward to move you off of him which took you slightly by surprise. 

“If you don’t need anything, you need to leave. I’m working and don’t have time for this right now.”

His word choice was very careful but his tone was harsh and cold. In the back of your mind, you knew he was getting tired of this, of you. You felt the way you’ve been acting has irritated him but you never knew for sure because he didn’t want to tell you. Just like how you didn’t want to tell him what’s been wrong with you. 

“Isaac, you said I could be in here…”

“Just not right now, okay? I have a lot of shit to do, I don’t have time for… this.”

Now it hit you; he was irritated. You were a burden to him. It was fine. He’s a busy man with priorities and he can’t afford to prioritize you over his work. You got it. 

“Right, sorry.”

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

You didn’t like being alone, it wasn’t how you coped. Typically, you don’t like talking about your feelings even though you encourage others to. It wasn’t something you were good at and so you found it easier to sulk with Isaac. That wasn’t an option anymore since kicked you out of his study. 

“Pickle?” 

Your head rose as the bedroom door creaked open a bit. 

“Hi, Isaac.”

You let yourself fall back on your pillow. 

“Look,” He sat down next to you on the bed, “I don’t know what’s going on with you and you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, okay? But I can see that whatever it is, it’s eating at you and sucking the life out of you. I just want to be here for you and at first, this frustrated me a lot, seeing you so…”

“Miserable?”

He half-smiled at your self-deprecating joke, “Slightly. I just want you to know I’m here whenever you need me and I’m sorry for not understanding it earlier. I still don’t understand but it– it doesn’t bother me.”

You lifted your head to see his pitiful expression. Maybe you were wrong. Maybe you weren’t a burden.

“I’m sorry for acting so weird. I know it’s not like me but I just can’t explain it. All I know is that I feel so… down? I guess. I know it’s annoying–”

“Never that.”

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

ahh ty for requesting i hope u feel better soon !1!!!11! i hope this met your expectations at least a little bit !

the other fics i promised r coming after this i swear yall 😭 i was just taking a small breather

[majoryeager104]

heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ty for doing meh request :)

could you do another comfort fic for hawks and dabi with a user who gets more cheerful and active when sad/depppressed and have a hard time talking abt whats wrong ? I have a problem where i get rlly more acting like im fine when i feel like shit and it drives me kinda crazy cause no one can ever tell when im sad sooo yeah

i sowwy im bringing out de angsty comforty requests

ill be sending some silly fluff requests ater this one :D

hope ye have a lovely day :D

girl I do the same thing 😭 I’ll totally write it no need to apologize for the request I enjoy writing em 🫶🫶🫶

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Keigo

Keigo had known you for a while now. So much so that he could pick up a thing or two when it came to your behaviors. He’d been taught to read people in the hero’s commission training, so he could read just about anyone like an open book. You however, were a much harder book to read. Keigo doesn’t consider himself to be the best at communicating his thoughts or feelings, and it seemed to him like you struggled with the same thing, even in a similar way. His issue, was how he’d crack through that overly positive shell when he knew damn well you were hurting.

“hey y/nnnnnnn”

“hey Keigoooo”

Playing along with his teasing, you turned and grinned at him, the smile not reaching your eyes in the few seconds that the two of you made eye contact. Yep, you were upset. He watched as you turned back to the laundry you were currently folding. Busying and distracting yourself from the thoughts that you currently found suffocating. How should he do this? Was he gonna make it worse? He shook the thoughts away. It wasn’t the time to overthink.

He walked up behind you, snaking his strong arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder. From this point forward, you could suppose he was winging it. What else could he do? So, needless to say the next words he said caused you to pause.

“what’s bothering you, y/n?”

You let out a sharp exhale- how’d he know? It’s not like you were trying to hide it, hiding it sort of…happened. Did he think you were trying to lie? Was he upset?

“You’re acting cheery…but there’s something wrong. You can tell me, yknow. It’s kinda my job to help people.” He smiled against your skin, placing a few gentle kisses on your cheek as he spoke. Of course he’d figured you out by now, why wouldn’t he?

“how’d you know?”

Your voice faltered as you tried to fake another smile,

“That pretty smile of yours didn’t reach your eyes”

You were equally surprised and…happy. You’d had this habit for ages, and growing up you usually just felt like your feelings were…forgotten. They were there, but they were tucked away behind the mask you used to cope. And yet, Keigo managed to see right through that mask…that was what made you happy, you supposed, was that he made efforts to understand you in ways no one else ever did.

And so, you told him what was bothering you, and he listened, all the while helping you with your laundry.

The help was nice, but his understanding and genuine nature was even better. Before you knew it, he’d cracked a few jokes and got you smiling again, for real this time.

“there it is”

He said in a song-song voice, pinching your cheek. Once again, you found yourself giggling at his antics, playfully swatting away his hand.

“There what is?”

He sighed, stepping close enough to place a quick, soft kiss on your forehead, before gently flicking the spot with a grin.

“That pretty smile of yours! The real one, this time.”

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Touya

Your smile looked…different. Touya noticed the change immediately, but he wasn’t sure what it meant. It wasn’t a gradual change, no, it seemed to him that all of a sudden your smiles were…fabricated. Maybe he was just reading between lines, but if you’ve seen someone’s genuine smile enough, you’ll know the inauthentic ones from a mile away, which he did. Touya had earned your smiles a million times, whether it be from his casual flirtations and jokes, or his sweet words he’d only ever let you hear. He knew that contagious grin from anywhere, but the smile you’d worn lately was not that.

But, he didn’t know what the hell to do about it. Should he ask you? Would that be weird? What if it was nothing, and he just ended up making you feel self conscious? So instead, he just quietly watched you busy yourself organizing your bookshelf.

Till he wasn’t quiet about it at least.

“what’s wrong?”

He of course changed his mind about keeping it to himself, because he couldn’t keep watching knowing something was wrong, whether he knew what it was or not.

You glanced over at him, and there it was again, that smile that didn’t quite fit. “what do you mean? Nothings-”

“you’re smiling weird. Stop it.”

you raised your eyebrows, but the quickly furrowed into a look of faux confusion. He scoffed at this, standing to walk towards where you sat. He knelt down next to you on the floor, his blue eyes boring into you. “just tell me what’s wrong.”

“nothings wrong”

“something’s wrong. Your usual smile’s much prettier. You know, the real one?”

“Touya-”

“aren’t people in relationships s’posed to be honest with each other about feelings and shit?”

you laughed nervously, going back to sorting, as if ignoring him would make him let it go. You probably should have known that wasn’t the case.

Rather than giving up and walking away, he grabbed the book in your hand, setting it down while his other hand cupped your cheek and forced you to look at him. “y/n.”

“…Yes?”

“spill it. I’m not stupid.”

his voice was gruff, and as always, it was also hard to ignore. So you told him what’d been bothering you, and he plopped down next to you, playing mindlessly with your hair as you spoke. Once you were done he looked at you with a frown. “That’s what you were worried about tellin me?” he sighed, a small smile forming on his face. He’d known what had happened, he just didn’t know it was bothering you. Of course, you didn’t make that easier by hiding how upset it made you, but nonetheless. “Man, you gotta get your shit together”

“Touya!”

“I mean- ugh, I’m not talking about that… I mean, you’re always asking me to be open with you, and I have…”

He glanced up at you, flicking your forehead. “Just… be honest next time, stupid. I’m always here anyways, so, don’t just smile and act like it’s okay when it’s not…”

You couldn’t help but sigh, a soft smile forming on your face too as you ruffled his soft hair. “you’re probably right…”

“I know I’m right, doll…love you”

“love you more”

he side eyed you for a moment, and you couldn’t help but grin, for real this time. He scoffed with a smile.

“don’t compete with me I will win.”

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

I fuckin love this song 😭😭😭

a/n Lowkey(high key actually) hoping I can find someone who actually can see past the fake smiles like this yk 🥲 like if I had a Touya I’d never try to hide my feelings again I proooomisssse 🙏🙏🙏(I’d do it so he’d flick my forehead and call me doll 😁)

Banner creds to @ melwakame/Goto and @ Sharlock!