#and hopefully I can somehow get over the anxiety

[elektroyu]

It's October, it's finally here. The most difficult month of the year 🥲

[quarterlifekitty]

That Price coming home to his missus with a baby thing was delicious, absolutely divine. Do you think for the other boys and Nik it'd be something similar or would they have wildly different reactions? Btw I absolutely love your writing, I check your blog daily for your new stuff, the way you write is delicious, thank you <3

I’ll give you a little something for Ghost since you made me blush and teehee

Also uhhhh I might’ve fucked up the timing a little on infant development milestones but you’re gonna have to forgive me on that

cw: suspicions of infidelity

Ghost is bouncing his leg the whole time he spends in evac. The heli ride, the plane back to base, the car back to his flat— as soon as he was released from the mind frame of the mission it was like all of that anxiety over you he’d built up over the past year and half came crashing on his head.

You’d’ve left him. You must have. He wasn’t really anything he’d call worth sticking around for. That was the plain and honest truth. He’s thinking of the quickest way he can find you and get on his knees for you once he’s scraped all of the blood and dirt off. It was easy to nod and go along with a sudden job Price called about, back when he was under the impression that it would be a few months tops.

He sees a light on in the window of your shared flat. Fuck, hopefully that you and not some new tenant— that somehow his automatic payments had fucked up while he was away and he got evicted. For a split second he debates whether sprinting up the stairs would be faster than waiting for this god-forsaken lift.

He pauses at the door when he hears your laughter. Thank fucking god. His relief is palpable, he’s thanking you and god and whoever else will listen, he’ll never ask for anything again—

“When did you get so cute, huh?”

No.

You wouldn’t.

Not in the flat you two shared, where you fucked and loved each other and cried together, the world couldn’t possibly be so cruel that you’d—

He gets as far as bursting through the door after he manages to find the right key before he’s stopped in his tracks. You look to the door like a deer in headlights, your eyes wide and with a little spoon of sweet potato puree in your hand. Your hair is a mess and—

There’s a baby looking at him. Looking where mommy is looking. The fat little thing is in a high chair, a mess on its face. The name “Lydia” is embroidered in big, swirly letters on her bib. It was a name he’d talked about, his one decent childhood memory, his aunt—

He drops his duffel and rips off the mask. The baby has these whisps of hair that are undeniably yours, eyes that he’s only seen in the mirror.

“Simon— is it really you?” You almost whisper in disbelief. Like you’d dreamed him coming through the door before. Makes his heart fucking ache. The words come out of his mouth before he can stop them.

“Yeah, mama. S’me.”

[moonstruckme]

If it interests you, could you maybe do poly!marauders smut surrounding how they would react when reader gives one of the boys a blowjob? If this isn’t comfy for you I apologize immensely. I double checked your rules so hopefully I didn’t overstep or anything. Love your work! Also my middle name is Mae:)))

Honestly babe when I read this I didn’t know if I was comfy with it either (not because of you, just because I didn’t know if I’d be able to write it) but I decided to give it a go and somehow it turned into over 2k words? So thanks!

cw: smut mdni, oral (m receiving), praise, this might be horrible? I can't decide if I hate it

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 2.1k words

Sirius’ kisses have turned sloppy, one of his hands wrapped loosely around your neck while the other wiggles its fingers below the waistband of your jeans, taking greedy handfuls of hip. His hard length presses into your thigh through his pants. You tilt your head, slanting your mouth against his so you can kiss him more deeply, and a low groan rumbles through him. 

He plants a chaste kiss on your lips before starting to mark a path downwards. 

You know where this is going, and you like where this is going, but still a breathless “wait” slips past your lips. 

Sirius pauses, his face hovering over your middle. Next to you on the bed, your boyfriends continue making out, but you can see you’ve caught James’ attention. His eyes open to slits, peeking from beneath his lashes to check on you. 

“What’s up?” Sirius asks, rubbing your hip. “Don’t feel like it?” 

“No, I just…” you rub your lips together nervously, and you see his eyes drop to the motion. Already large pupils growing larger. “I wanted to know if I can ask you something.” 

Sirius’ eyes skim over you, a slow perusal that’s probably meant to deduce the cause of your anxiety but only serves to worsen it. “Sure you can,” he says, tone somewhat gentler than usual. “What is it, sweetness?” 

“Could you maybe,” you ask hesitantly, wishing you could lean away from him, as if some distance between you would make this any less embarrassing, “teach me to give you a blowjob?” 

Sirius’ lips part in surprise. This time it’s Remus who you catch looking over, a second before James breaks their kiss, sitting up over Remus’ torso. 

“You wanna learn?” James asks, lips bitten red and swollen. 

You glance between him and Sirius, not quite sure who to look at. “Yeah?” you say, hating the way your voice crawls up into a question. 

Sirius’ eyebrows twitch together. “You know you don’t have to,” he says, “right?” 

“I know.” You give him a little smile. “I’m just curious, I guess.” 

“Okay,” he says. His thumb sweeps over your hip like he knows you need the reassurance. “Yeah, we can show you, gorgeous. Wanna do it sitting down?” 

You take a breath, nodding before crawling out from under him and kneeling on the floor by the bed. Sirius follows you, sitting on the edge of the mattress and spreading his legs wide. Your brain buzzes in response to the erection you can see bulging through his pants. 

You glance towards the other boys. “Are you guys just going to…watch?” 

They’ve both been staring at you, but now James grins sheepishly. “If you don’t mind.” 

“We can help, if you’re alright with that,” Remus offers. “Give you tips.” 

You can feel your face growing warm at the prospect of them being witness to your bumbling first attempt, but you don’t hate the idea of them coaching you through it. 

“M’kay,” you say. “Um, what do I do?” 

“Try taking it out, sweetheart.” There’s a bit of laughter in Remus’ voice, but his hand is gentle as he reaches over the edge of the bed, brushing your hair behind your ear. 

Your eyes flit up to Sirius’ face. He gives you a smile, and you undo his pants, pulling down the waistband of his underwear so that his length springs free. For a few moments you just look at it, wetting your lips before looking to the boys for direction. 

“Here.” James gets down on the floor beside you and takes your hand in his, guiding it to Sirius’ shaft. “You’re probably gonna want to start by holding it like this, okay?” He wraps your fingers around the base. “Good. Now be careful to cover your teeth, and just try putting it in your mouth.” 

Just? You glance up at Sirius again, and a bit of pride swells in you at the undisguised lust in his expression.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” you tell him softly. 

“Me neither,” he jokes, reaching down to thumb affectionately at your cheek. “You won’t hurt me, baby. And you can stop anytime you want, you know that. If you don’t like it, just stop.” 

You bob your head, wrap your lips around your teeth, and take him into your mouth before you can think too hard about it. His cock feels odd and weighty on your tongue. You lean forward a bit, seeing how far you can go. 

“Breathe through your nose,” Remus instructs. “Try sucking on it, whenever you’re ready.” 

You let your jaw relax, sucking experimentally, like you might on a popsicle. Sirius moans. 

“Just like that,” he says, voice taking on a thick quality. “Fuck, good job, baby.” 

Warmth unfurls in your gut at the praise. You suckle a bit longer, getting used to the feel of him in your mouth before you begin moving slowly forward and backward. After a few tries, your lips are making contact with the curled O of your thumb and forefinger each time. Sirius’ cock twitches in your mouth. 

“You’ve got it, angel.” James’ big hand roves the curves of your side, his touch steadying your nerves and stirring that heat in your core. “Don’t rush yourself, but if you wanna take him deeper you can take your hand off.” 

You do it with little hesitation, high on praise and the rush of what you’ve already accomplished, and ease more of Sirius’ shaft into your mouth. He puts a hand in your hair to help you along, but then all of a sudden it’s too deep, too big, too much. You gag, choking. 

Sirius’ hand disappears instantly, but you’re not so ready to give up. Your throat spasms around the intrusion, vision blurring as you try to breathe through your nose. 

“Easy,” Remus murmurs.

You finally can’t stand it anymore, pulling away and drawing in a gasping breath. 

“Shit,” Sirius says, and you lift your teary eyes to his embarrassedly while James rubs your back. “You alright?” 

“Yeah,” you manage, swallowing. “Sorry.” 

His eyes go soft. “Don’t be sorry, you did great. Do you wanna stop now?” 

You shake your head. “I think I just need a second.” 

He nods, and there’s a few seconds of quiet, James' hand coasting up and down your spine. “Do you think a demonstration would help?’ he asks. 

You swipe under your lashes, looking over at him curiously. “Um, maybe? I’m not sure.” 

He exchanges a quick look with Remus before grinning, shuffling closer to where the other boy sits at the edge of the bed and taking off his glasses. “Here. Sirius, talk her through what I’m doing, yeah?” 

Sirius seems about as transfixed by what’s about to happen as you are, but he nods. James does as you had, taking Remus’ cock out of his pants, and there’s no need to get it warmed up after the show you’ve been giving them. He feeds it right into his mouth. Remus groans as James takes his entire length expertly, fisting a hand in the other boy’s curly hair. 

“Right. Um, see how he’s breathing deep through his nose?” Sirius clears his throat, voice noticeably rough as he watches James’ lips move over Remus’ shaft. “He’s keeping his throat relaxed, not moving back and forth too much.” 

You watch as James’ mouth grows wet with spit and slick, his eyes watering a bit as he fights his gag reflex. His throat bobs, and Remus swears, his grip tightening on James’ hair. 

“And when he swallows,” Sirius manages, “his throat tightens, which is…uh, nice.” 

Remus lets out a breathy, half-delirious laugh at Sirius’ commentary. His cheeks are flushed red from pleasure and the attention, and it’s not long before curses start to spew from his mouth and he goes rigid, cuming down James’ throat. James swallows, grinning up at him. Lips and eyes shiny.

You and Sirius watch them for a few seconds longer, entranced by the sight of your boyfriends. 

“Okay.” You clear your throat. “Um, thanks.” 

“Yeah, thanks,” Remus says weakly, and you have to swallow a laugh. 

You turn to Sirius. “I think I’m ready to try again.” 

He gestures as if to say Go right ahead, and you take his shaft in your hand, guiding it back into your mouth. Once again, it takes time to adjust to the feeling, but this time when his head hits the back of your throat you’re ready for it. You breathe steadily through your mouth, focussing on staying relaxed as you suck gently. 

“There you go, angel,” James praises, putting his glasses back on to watch you. “You’re taking him so well.” 

“Fucking yeah she is,” Sirius agrees, voice growing reedy as he starts to pant. You take one of his legs to steady yourself, hand wrapping around a tattoo on his thigh. “Look at me, baby.” 

You lift your watery eyes to his, finding the stormcloud gray nearly eclipsed by dark pupil. The raw want in them makes your cunt throb. Sirius must find your face nearly as arousing, because he mutters another quiet, Fuck.

You’re distantly conscious of Remus shuffling back to the edge of the bed, and then he’s laying his head on his arms, gazing down at you. “Look at you, such a quick learner,” he hums. “You’re doing such a good job, sweetheart. Making him feel so good.” 

“Look at her eyes,” James says, just loud enough so you can hear. You know they’re aware of what their words are doing to you, of the wetness pooling in your underwear. “She looks so pretty like this, doesn’t she?” 

“She does,” Remus agrees. “Our pretty girl.” 

You move a bit more surely over Sirius’ length, constricting your throat tentatively. Sirius moans loudly, his hand twitching toward you before he stops it. You take it in yours, setting it on the back of your head so he can guide you the way he wants. 

“Fuck, that’s my girl,” he pants, tangling his hand in your hair. “So good f’me.” 

You make a small, pleasurable sound, and another moan slips from between his lips, his hand urging you closer. You breathe through it when his cock sponges against the back of your throat, starting to enjoy the odd sensation of your mouth and throat being so deliciously full—and, if you’re being honest with yourself, the feeling of knowing you’re doing well. And if Sirius’ increasingly loud curses and the other boys’ murmured praise are anything to go by, you’re doing rather well. 

“God, I wish you could see how you look right now,” James says, voice smooth as velvet as he drops a kiss on your shoulder. “You’re so lovely.” 

“Fucking hot, s’what she is,” Sirius insists, brows coming together so urgently you wonder for a second if he’s in pain. “Fuck. Shit, where can I cum?” 

You don’t take your mouth off his cock, doing your best to communicate with your eyes. Sirius seems to get the message, his grip on your hair tightening, pulling at your scalp as his thigh tenses under your hand. You swallow hurriedly, and the sounds that leave him will echo in your dreams for the rest of the week, loud, pleady moans interspersed with mangled curses. Your mouth fills with warm wetness, and you ease him out of your throat before swallowing again. 

“There we are.” James tugs you gently away when he realizes neither you or Sirius are moving, pulling you half into his lap. “You did it, sweetheart, great job.” 

He strokes his thumb under your eyes for you, wiping away the wetness there as Remus watches you move your tongue around in your mouth funnily. 

“You alright?” he asks you.

You nod. “Tastes different than I thought it would,” you say. 

James laughs, the sound bright and clear. He plants a smacking kiss on your cheek. 

“Not bad, I hope,” Sirius says, voice still a bit stringy. He leans back on his elbows, watching you from the bed. 

You feel color rise to your cheeks. “No. Not bad.” 

His lips quirk up, eyes steady on yours. “That was fucking killer,” he tells you, “especially for your first time. Thanks for that, gorgeous.” 

You grin bashfully, dropping your eyes. James clears his throat loudly. 

“Right, right, and thank you for the demonstration,” Sirius adds. “Very instructive.” 

James beams, but Sirius only pats the bed next to him. 

“Why don’t you hop up here so I can give you a real thanks?” 

Impossibly, James’ smile widens. He’s quick to obey, Sirius moving to take his place on the floor. Your lips part, and you hear Remus chuckle. You turn to find his amber eyes watching you. They linger on your lips, still glossy and swollen. 

“Y’want me to help you out too, sweetheart?” He juts his chin toward the bed, a silent request for you to lie down. “Seems only fair, doesn’t it.” 

[wholoveseggs]

Maybe an elijah x Reader where the Reader is a bit shy about sex and really wants to try out face riding, but is insecure about her weight like that she's scared she'll hurt him or something like that. So somehow elijah finds out (for example thru a dream which he enters) and does it, but she'll try to pull away at the beginning still scared of hurting him and he'll pull her down.

If possible with lots of praise, overstimulation, elijah being dominant, hand kink, sir kink, elijah being a sweetheart, and aftercare?

Soft

18+ ---- {Masterlist} {Tag-List}

You've been dating Elijah for a while, but your insecurities keep you from taking things further. But one night, Elijah finally gets the chance to show you how much he loves your curves.

♡♡ Thanks for the request @magicaleaglecloud, I've written a similar fic on this subject called Reminder, but I love this idea so much I'm happy to write more. ♡♡

♡♡ This once again goes out to all my thick thighed brothers and sisters! ♡♡

3.4k words - Warnings: smut, fluff, oral sex, sex dreams, insecure reader, body issues, soft dom!elijah, slight sir!kink, face sitting, fingering, little bit of spanking, tinsy bit of overstim, a fun history fact about beauty standards, praise, kisses & lots of sweetness ♡♡♡

You were beyond nervous, and it showed. You and your boyfriend Elijah Mikaelson had been dating for the last year, and while you loved each other and you wanted to sleep with him, you had been putting it off.

It wasn't anything to do with him, of course. It had everything to do with your insecurities. You didn't fit the current beauty standard. You weren't as skinny as some of the girls Elijah had been with before you. Your hips and thighs touched, you had a stomach, and your breasts were bigger than you liked.

And while you had seen Elijah's eyes roam your body whenever you were with him. You couldn't help but wonder if he secretly felt the same.

You knew you couldn't hold off forever. The thought of being so naked and exposed was beyond scary. But you wanted to be with him in every sense of the word. And you knew you needed to get over yourself.

The plan was to stay the night at his place, a big step for the two of you. You would be spending the night with him. Sleeping in the same bed. And maybe, hopefully, doing other things.

You spent far too much time getting ready, making sure your skin was as flawless as possible, and your hair was just right. You packed the sexiest sleepwear you owned, a deep blue satin nightgown that fell mid-thigh.

Elijah had made reservations at your favorite restaurant, and the entire meal had been magical. Although, you didn't want to eat a lot in front of him. There was always so much shame around your body, and you didn't want him to see it.

"So I'm thinking we can have some wine and relax. Maybe watch a movie or two," Elijah said as he parked the car in front of his house.

"Sounds great." You smiled and took a breath, trying to calm yourself down.

He took your hand, sensing your unease, you were so beautiful and lovely, and he couldn't understand why you were so hard on yourself. He never wanted you to feel that way.

The evening had been perfect. You watched movies, you talked, and you drank the wine, and you felt the tension slowly slipping from your body. He kissed you and it had quickly grown passionate, his lips moving down your neck and you moaned his name.

You weren't sure how it happened, but he was suddenly on top of you, and the feel of his large frame pressed into yours had been amazing. But you felt your anxiety start to bubble to the surface.

"Elijah, wait," you said softly, gently pushing against his chest.

"What's wrong?" He asked, immediately concerned.

"I'm sorry, it's nothing. I just...can I have a moment?" You said, feeling a mix of embarrassed and scared.

"Of course," he said, getting up and allowing you to move from the couch. "Let's go back to the bedroom. We don't have to do anything."

"I'm sorry." You said as he pulled you into his arms, kissing the top of your head.

"Darling, there is nothing to be sorry about." He said, leading you to his bedroom. "Why don't you get ready for bed? I'm going to take a shower," he said, sensing that you needed a moment alone.

You smiled, feeling like you could breathe. You loved him so much. You were so lucky to have him.

You changed into your nightgown and pulled out your lotion and went about the process of rubbing it into your legs and arms.

You caught a glimpse of yourself in his floor length mirror, and your insecurities came rushing back.

The material clung to you in all the wrong ways. It hugged your hips and stomach and breasts. You frowned, hating the sight. You quickly pulled the blankets down and crawled into bed. There was no way you could let him see you like this.

You tried not to cry, feeling such shame and humiliation, you decided to just sleep and pretend the evening didn't happen.

When Elijah returned, you had fully fallen asleep. He frowned slightly, wishing he could read your mind, wishing he could know what to say. You were so beautiful. How could you not see it?

He slipped into bed beside you and smiled when you instinctively curled into him. You looked so peaceful, and he didn't have the heart to wake you.

The blankets were pulled down a bit, the swell of your breasts clearly visible. And it was impossible not to look.

He loved your body. He loved your curves. He loved the way you felt in his arms. So soft and warm.

You made a quiet little noise and pressed closer to him, and he felt himself harden. It was impossible not to.

Your eyes were moving under your eyelids and your breathing was uneven. Your hands gripped at him, pulling him closer.

"Are you dreaming, my beautiful girl?" Elijah said, brushing the hair away from your face.

"Hmm, Elijah," you moaned quietly, your hips moving and pressing into him.

He smiled, curious about what was going on in your mind, wondering what you were dreaming about.

"Fuck," you said, moving your hips again.

He couldn't help it, he had to know.

His hand gently caressed the side of your face, and then he slowly pressed into your mind, feeling the sensations your dream was causing.

He saw you straddling his face, your hands gripping the headboard, and he could practically taste you on his tongue. You were completely unbidden, your beautiful body bouncing above him, and his large hands gripped your hips.

Elijah pulled out of your mind, groaning at the vision.

"Mm, please," you whimpered, and he was so tempted.

He looked down, your nipples were straining against the material of your gown. Your eyebrows arched, and you moved against him.

"Elijah." You sighed his name, and it was too much.

He couldn't possibly leave this fantasy of yours to the dream world. He had to give you what you needed.

He whispered your name, gently biting down on your earlobe, and you woke with a gasp.

"Elijah." Your voice was thick and sleepy, and it did things to him.

"Did you have a good dream?" He said, kissing along your neck and sucking lightly on your pulse point.

"Yes." You moaned, unable to deny it.

"Tell me," he said, pulling the blankets back, his hands roaming over your body.

"You...we..." You moaned, unsure of how to tell him.

He kissed down your neck, his hands moving down to grip your ass and pull you against him.

"You are so sweet and shy. It's adorable." He smiled, loving the way you blushed.

He started kissing his way down your body, and it was clear where he was headed. His hands dipped under your gown and pushed the material up and over your breasts.

"Elijah." You moaned, trying to cover yourself.

"No." He said, taking your wrists and placing them by your sides. "Don't hide from me. I want to see all of you."

You nodded, closing your eyes as he kissed along your breasts and took a nipple into his mouth. You moaned, arching up into him, loving the way he felt against you.

"So beautiful," he whispered, his lips ghosting over your skin.

He moved further down your body, and his hands gripped your thighs, gently pulling them apart. His lips ghosted over your stomach and you felt yourself tensing up.

"Elijah," you whispered, wanting to stop him, but the feel of his mouth so close to where you were aching for him was too much.

He gently bit down on the soft flesh of your thighs, kissing and nipping at the sensitive skin.

"So fucking sexy." He said, looking up at you, his eyes full of lust.

"Wait," you said, sitting up and covering yourself, "I...you don't have to."

He pushed you back down, grabbing your wrists and holding them by your sides.

"Stop. Please, my love. Don't be ashamed." He said, kissing the swell of your stomach and moving further down.

"But..." you moaned, feeling his mouth between your legs, and your words died in your throat.

His mouth was gentle and slow, and he teased your clit, taking his time with you. His tongue moved in lazy circles, and he gently sucked, making you squirm and moan his name.

"Fuck, you taste so good." He groaned, loving the way you moved.

His fingers replaced his tongue and he pushed two inside of you. Moving up to kiss you, letting you taste yourself on his lips.

"Tell me what you like," he said, moving his fingers slowly, wanting to see what made you squirm.

"I like...when you do that." You gasped, his fingers moving deeper and hitting a spot that had you seeing stars.

He kissed along your neck, and he gently nipped at your pulse point, and he could feel your heartbeat quicken.

"You like my fingers baby?" He said, and his words were doing things to you.

"Mmhmm." You moaned, closing your eyes and giving in to the pleasure.

He started moving his fingers faster, curling them with each thrust. And then he pushed a third finger inside of you, stretching you open, and his thumb moved in slow circles over your clit.

"Fuck, oh god. Don't stop. Please." You begged, rocking your hips.

"You're so beautiful. I love the way you move." He said, his hand moving down to grip your thigh and hold you open.

"Please. Please. Fuck, I need..." You gasped, and his mouth covered yours, his tongue slipping into your mouth, and he swallowed your moans.

"You need to cum, is that it, sweet girl?" He asked, and you couldn't believe he was saying these things to you.

"Please, sir." You moaned, and the word slipped out before you could stop yourself.

He grinned, loving the way it sounded, and he wanted to hear it again.

"Cum for me, now." He said, his fingers moving faster, and his thumb pressing against your clit.

The combination was enough to send you over the edge, and the orgasm was powerful, leaving you a shaking mess, moaning his name.

You opened your eyes, and you could see him staring at you. Your cheeks flushed, and you closed your eyes.

"Open your eyes." He commanded, and you obeyed, meeting his gaze.

"There's my beautiful girl. Now, come sit on my face."

"What?" You were sure you heard him wrong.

"Sit on my face. Now." He repeated.

"I...um..." You started, but he cut you off, grabbing your hips and moving you above him.

"That's a good girl." He said, helping you place your knees on either side of his face.

You were trembling, scared that you were too heavy. That the angle was wrong. You wanted to cover yourself. You were so vulnerable like this.

"I said sit." He said, his hands gripping your hips and pulling you down onto his mouth.

"Oh god." You gasped, unable to control the movement of your hips as his tongue started to lick at you.

It was too much. You couldn't take it. Your hands gripped his hair, and his hands grabbed your ass, pulling you down onto him.

You didn't know how he was breathing, but he didn't stop. He smacked your ass hard and growled, and the vibration was intense.

"Good girl, just like that." He said, and his praise went straight to your core.

You moved against him, not caring how desperate you looked, or how unsexy you must have appeared.

"That's it, fuck my face. Take what you need." He said, watching as your body responded to him.

You didn't even know it was possible to orgasm again that quickly, but his tongue was magic, and you were falling apart above him.

You grabbed the headboard, unable to hold back, and his fingers dug into your hips.

"Fuck, I can't. Elijah." You moaned, and the orgasm was more intense than the first one.

Your body was shaking, and he didn't stop. His tongue moved inside of you, and his nose brushed against your clit, the sensation overwhelming.

"Too much!" You said, trying to move away.

He held you in place, smacking your ass, and making you gasp.

"I decide when it's too much," he said, and there was something in his voice that left you shaking.

"Yes sir," you said, your voice a breathy whisper.

He groaned, his tongue moving faster. You moved your hips, matching his rhythm. And the next orgasm was so intense that your knees almost gave out.

"Such a good girl. Come here." He said, moving you down his torso so that your head was resting against his chest, and you were a sweaty, trembling mess.

His hands were all over your body, feeling every curve, every soft place. His lips moved against yours, and you could taste yourself on him.

You were still trying to catch your breath, and your entire body was shaking. You sat up, suddenly very self-conscious, your thick thighs straddling his waist.

"You are so sexy." He said, sitting up and kissing your neck.

"Really?" You asked, surprised and embarrassed, you never felt that way about yourself.

"You have no idea." He said, his hands moving down your back.

He gripped your ass, and his hips moved up, and you could feel his hard length pressing into you. The way his dark eyes watched you had you squirming. His hands moving to push the straps of your nightgown down.

"I want to see all of you. Can I take this off?" He asked, and he was so sweet and kind, and it only made you fall in love with him even more.

"Okay." You nodded, and his hands pulled the material up over your head, tossing it aside and exposing you completely.

"Perfect." He said, his eyes roaming your body.

"Elijah." You whined, covering your breasts, but he took your hands and held them at your sides.

"Let me look at you. I want to see how gorgeous you are. So beautiful." He said, his words were a complete contradiction to the way you felt.

"I'm not," you said, hating the way his eyes were taking you in.

Elijah shook his head, kissing you softly, his hands moved along your body, caressing every inch of you.

"You are." He whispered, and his words were almost convincing.

You shook your head, trying to pull away, but he wrapped his arms around you and held you close.

"Did you know that in the 16th century, women with curvy bodies were considered more beautiful than thin women? In fact, there is a painting from the 1700s by Antonio Canova called The Three Graces, and the figure on the right is considered to be the most beautiful because of her curves."

"Elijah." You couldn't help but laugh at him.

"My sweet girl, I am not trying to convince you of something that you are not ready to believe. But I will always find you the most beautiful woman in the world." He said, kissing your forehead.

You felt yourself blushing and tears were threatening to fall.

"Don't cry," he said, his hands moving along your back, trying to soothe you.

"I'm not, it's just..." you took a breath, unsure of what to say.

"Come here," he said, gently rolling you onto your back and positioning himself above you. "I can show you."

"What?" You asked, a little confused, but the look in his eyes had you curious.

"I can show you how much I love your body. If you'll let me."

"Yes," you nodded, knowing there was no way you could tell him no.

"Good girl." He said, and you could feel the blush on your cheeks.

He kissed you, his lips moving along your neck, and down to your breasts. He kissed each one and moved lower.

"I love the way your breasts fit in my hands." He said, gently kneading the soft flesh and sucking a nipple into his mouth.

"Elijah." You whimpered, and his hands moved to grab your ass.

"I love the way your curves fill out my hands." He said, moving lower and kissing the swell of your stomach, his fingers dipping into the indentation of your belly button, and making you giggle.

"Elijah, please."

"I love the way your thighs are soft and smooth." He said, gently biting the soft flesh and making you moan.

"I love the way your body responds to mine. The way you moan my name." He said, pushing his boxers off, and taking his hard length into his hand, and stroking himself.

"Elijah." You bit your lip, watching him.

"I love the way my cock fits perfectly between your legs." He said, spreading your legs and moving to rest his length against you.

"I love the way your hips are the perfect shape for my hands." He said, grabbing them and holding them tightly.

"I love the way my body feels against yours." He said, moving so that he was pressing into you.

He kissed you, and his hands moved to grab yours, holding them by the sides of your head.

"And I love the way my name sounds on your lips." He whispered, and his cock pushed into you.

He buried his face in your neck, his hands squeezing yours, and his body pressed into yours. You could feel every muscle tensing, and his heart racing.

"I love you, so much," he said, and the words had never been more real.

You wrapped your arms around him, and the moment was pure and uncomplicated. It was everything you needed, and more.

"Elijah," you sighed his name, and it was all the words you couldn't say.

He smiled, moving his hips slowly, his movements controlled and measured. You could feel every inch of him. You had never felt anything so amazing in your life.

You were overwhelmed, the feelings of pleasure mixing with the emotions coursing through your body. You could feel the tears slipping down your cheeks, and he wiped them away, kissing your face.

He pulled your legs back, pressing your knees to your chest, and his cock hit a spot that had you moaning.

"Good girl." He moaned, his thrusts growing faster, and the pleasure was almost too much.

Your body was shaking, and his movements were getting sloppy. His breathing was labored, and his words were a jumbled mess.

He reached down, his hand finding your clit, and he started rubbing slow circles, the pressure sending a jolt of pleasure through you.

"Cum for me." He commanded, and the orgasm hit you hard, your nails digging into his back, and your legs wrapping around him.

"Eli-" You cried out, your voice high-pitched and needy.

His name was a breathy moan, and he could barely hold on. He needed you to cum, needed to feel you clenching around him.

"That's my girl." He moaned, his hips slamming into yours. You could feel him losing control, his cock pulsing inside of you.

He couldn't hold on, the pleasure was too much, and the way you were squeezing his cock had him tumbling over the edge.

His hand found yours, and he intertwined his fingers with yours, his hips slowing, and his eyes met yours.

You didn't know how long you stayed like that, just enjoying the closeness, and the way your bodies were entwined. You wanted to stay in the moment forever. You could feel his heart beating, and his breath on your skin. He eventually got up and grabbed a warm washcloth, cleaning you both, and then crawled back into bed, pulling you close, and wrapping you in his arms. 

"Are you okay?" He asked, and he was worried that maybe he had hurt you. That he had been too rough, or that he had pushed you too far. But you were smiling, and you were happy, and the way your body had responded to him was everything he had hoped for.

"Yes. I'm perfect." You said, and he could see the way the light was reflecting in your eyes, and the smile on your face. He kissed you, his hand cupping your face, and his tongue tangling with yours.

He made you feel so loved and cared for. He made you feel like you were the most important person in his life. Like nothing else mattered.

And for the first time, you felt worthy of his love. A love you always deserved.

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[kingkat12]

all yours (roman godfrey x reader)

WARNINGS: 18+, phone sex, dark!Roman is back oops, descriptions of sex, foul language, yandere!reader sort of??

summary: why did Letha call?-- actually, the better question is, will Roman let you find out why?

word count: 8,551

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10

a/n: hi lovelies!!! to clarify, there are a few mentions of the beautiful actress Romy Schneider, and I will link her HERE for you to get who i'm talking about!! i had a dream where i called Roman Romy and i thought huh where did i get that from, and then i realized it was because i watched a movie with miss Schneider in it, so there you go!! THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT!!! enjoy!<33

I stared at the missed call from Letha, the glow of the screen illuminating my face as I hid beneath my duvet. Frozen in a fetal position, I listened to the sound of my heartbeat as my thumb inched toward her name. 

It was late-- too late to be awake, and too early to make a decision. The silence of my bedroom wrapped around me as my brows drew together in conflict, my head buzzing incessantly. It felt wrong to contemplate calling Letha back, especially as the cinnamon flavour of Roman's cigarettes lingered on my tongue. If I focused, I could still feel the push of his lips against my neck, and the pressure of his strong arms against my waist. It all made me shiver-- I wasn't sure what it would mean for my relationship with Roman if I called Letha back. How could I guarantee it wouldn't all blow up in my face? 

I groaned, hopefully not loud enough to wake my parents, before I scrolled away from Letha's name. I needed a reminder of why I had thrown my friendship with her away, why I had messed it all up in the first place-- I had to drown out the memory of Letha's laugh somehow.

So, I pressed my phone up against my ear, placing a hand over my heart to feel it thud against my palm while I waited. The beating of my blood quickened when I realized my call was getting answered despite the lateness of the hour;

"Hey, you," 

Oh, I nearly melted at the sound of his voice. "Rome," I echoed, giving into a soft smile.

I heard the shifting of bedsheets in the background; "Miss me already?"

"Yeah..."

"I left, like, two hours ago,"

"So? I can hear you smiling over there,"

Roman's warm chuckle sounded through the other end of the phone, and I imagined him shaking his head. "Say it again,"

It was impossible not to stir-- I couldn't lay still when his voice was so deep and tired. "I miss you," I peeked my head up from the duvet, as it was getting damn warm beneath my covers. "I'm sorry for calling so late, I just... needed to clear my head."

He hummed, stretching; "It's alright, I wasn't sleeping,"

"What were you doing then?"

There was a rather pregnant pause. "... None of your business,"

"Oh?" I propped myself up on my elbows, intrigued. "Roman, are you?--"

"What did you need to clear your head about?"

I realized I wasn't getting anywhere with this, and that I quickly needed to stop thinking about my boyfriend spread out on his bed, wearing nothing but his boxers, slowly palming himself through the fabric-- no, I needed to get my mind out of the gutter. "We didn't get a lot of time to discuss the fact that Letha called,"

"Okay... Do you plan on calling her back?"

My heart only beat harder against my palm, and I had to swallow hard as I laid back down on the bed; "Would you be mad if I did?" The silence that ensued made my hands clammy-- I ended up wiping them on my duvet as I waited for his answer, holding my breath. 

"Maybe?" Roman sighed, and I heard him tossing around in his bed. "I don't know what this feeling is, but... I just know it makes my chest burn. Doesn't feel good."

Something about his cluelessness made me want to grab his pretty face and pepper it with kisses. "Could be anxiety?"

"Nah, I don't have that shit,"

"Oh, Roman, everyone gets a little anxious sometimes!--"

"Stop rolling your eyes, I can hear it,"

Shocked, my heart nearly stopped-- he was right. I had rolled my eyes, and it freaked me out that he knew . "Fine... I won't call her back, then,"

"Alright,"

"You don't have to worry,"

"Alright,"

"Uh, do you have anything else to say other than alright?--"

"No,"

"... Alright," My brows drew together in confusion, wondering why Roman was retreating into his shell of emotional neglect. It was clear to me that the subject of Letha made him deeply uneasy, that he was probably worried she'd need me to break up with him for us to be friends again, but I tried to find comfort in the fact that he was scared to lose me... despite not being able to say that out loud. 

Still, Roman always managed to surprise me-- I heard him sigh once more at the other end of the phone, but this time, in a sulky manner. "Could you say it again?"

"Say what?"

"What you said in the car," I could hear the embarrassment in his voice, knowing he didn't usually make requests like these; "That you're mine."

My eyes widened just a smidge, staring up at my ceiling with a bewildered look on my face. The tone of his voice made my stomach flip, wondering why my brain went haywire for the needy sound of his request. I did my best not to squeal and kick my feet like a little girl-- "All yours, Rome,"

A hum; "All mine?"

"All yours," My smile spread wider than ever before, joy blossoming in my chest. "Only yours."

He let out a shaky breath-- "Shit... don't say it like that,"

"Like what?" 

"Like that," Roman shifted around in his bed, and I heard him kicking away his duvet. "I was already horny before you called, don't make it worse."

I was afraid my eyes would pop out of my skull as my air caught in my throat. So he had been doing what I thought he'd been doing? "You were the one who asked me to say it," I tried, feeling the adrenaline pumping through my body. This was definitely not going to help me sleep. "Why were you even doing that right now? It's so late!"

Roman only laughed-- "That call from Letha fucking cockblocked me in the car, what do you expect?"

"Christ," I mumbled, shaking my head as I pressed my palm against my forehead. Something about this was too damn thrilling. "So you're still... y'know?"

"Yep,"

"And... you're doing it right now?"

Another laugh ensued, deeper this time."Nah, I'm not that creepy. Just waiting for it to go down now... which is why you can't tell me you're mine with that sexy little voice of yours,"

Gosh, how that took my breath away. And even worse, was the maelstrom of ideas churning in my head about ways to milk this situation-- I really hoped my parents were asleep for this one. "Roman?"

"Yeah, baby?"

"I'm all yours,"

As expected, Roman groaned on the other end of the line. "Is that a green light?" he breathed. "Don't fuck with me right now, my brain doesn't work properly when you're involved."

I hadn't blushed like this in ages-- "I'm here if you want to go for it," Never in a million years did I think I would be having phone sex, especially not with Roman Godfrey. If someone had told me a month ago that this would be happening, I would've fainted on the spot. 

Roman's laugh was deep, warm; I pressed the phone against my cheek as my hands trembled in excitement. "Go for it," he echoed, a mocking tone about it. "I'm not doing this shit alone!"

"Oh?" 

"Not a fat chance in hell, baby. What are you wearing?"

My brows drew together as I realized what he was up to. Nervous, I lifted my duvet to check. My mind was so clouded by the thrill that I had genuinely forgotten what I was wearing. "Uh... A big t-shirt and my underwear?"

A hum. "What colour?"

"The t-shirt?" I wasn't sure why that mattered. 

Another laugh from Roman ensued-- this was probably the moment it dawned on him that I hadn't done this before either. "Fuck it, we'll skip this part," he murmured. "The panties, babe. Take them off." 

I let out a soft, nervous laugh, my trembling hands scurrying to take them off. As I laid my head back on my pillow, discarding my underwear somewhere along the bed, I pressed my phone back up to my ear just at the right moment-- I heard Roman's short, ragged breath, presumably resuming his activities. "Ugh, I miss having my mouth on you," he breathed, shifting around. "I've told you how good you taste, right?"

"Yeah, you have," His words made me want to squeal and throw my phone across the room, my brain going haywire. "I don't get it, but I'm not complaining. I like having you between my legs."

"Good. I'm planning to be there quite a lot,"

I squeezed my thighs together-- this was making me aroused a lot quicker than I was willing to admit. Still, I decided to be bold; "Too bad we were interrupted today... Was looking forward to having my mouth on you as well,"

"Right... As if you'd do that in my car on that open street,"

"There was no one there!" I rolled my eyes at the sound of Roman's laugh. "What I'm trying to say is that I'd like to try one day."

"Yeah?" His voice was deeper now, raw-- "You'd want me to teach you how?" 

I could only imagine the sight of him now; the way he closed his eyes, his hand wrapped around his hard cock as he worked his fingers around his shaft. I nearly lost my breath just thinking about it, and suddenly my mind was throwing me images of how it would be to wrap my mouth around it. How Roman would hold my hair, slowly buck up into my mouth with a soft grunt, telling me how good I was doing, how nice it felt-- I had a hard time snapping out of it. "Would love for you to teach me everything,"

"Fuck, baby," I could hear the shaky motions of his breath, the way it was on the brink of hitching. "Gonna take my time, teach you all I know... Don't you worry."

"You will?"

"You bet," Roman's voice was now barely a whisper against the phone, his words catching in his chest. "Gonna teach you how to take my cock, I know you'll do so well... So, so well, just like everything else you do."

That was it-- I reached between my legs, closing my eyes as I placed my fingers against my clit. It was impossible to stay away now. "You'll take care of me, won't you? Go slow?"

"Of course I will-- hah," 

My breath grew unsteady; "Shit, Rome, you've got me wet in record time," I dipped my fingers a little further down, feeling my arousal pooling between my legs. 

"Yeah? Well, I'm damn hard for you," he breathed, a soft, quiet moan following. "Wanna sink into you, feel your tight little pussy around me..."

Had I not been so out of it, I would've called him out for being vulgar. Roman hadn't been this dirty before. My cheeks were downright burning.

"Wanna fuck you so good, you'll never leave. You'll just keep coming back, letting me make you cum over and over..."

I was squirming at this point-- oh, what I would give for Roman to be here with me right now. Have him wrap his arm around me, rub my clit for me, whispering all these dirty things into my ear instead of through the phone. "I won't leave, Rome,"

That seemed to be the most compelling thing I could've said. I could almost hear the way he threw his head back against his pillow, a small, wanton moan escaping his lips; "You're all mine, baby... Only mine, aren't you?"

Who would've thought this was the thing that would break Roman Godfrey? 

"All yours,"

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

I was rather anxious to see Roman the next day at school-- I didn't know how to deal with all the dirty stuff we talked about on the phone last night. How was I supposed to look him in the eyes, knowing he thought about me like that? I wasn't complaining, but it was incredibly foreign.

We hadn't talked much today, other than the usual good morning text, and I dreaded answering the text he sent me right afterward;

romy schneider: did you sleep well?;)

I was aware that it sounded innocent, but it was impossible not to hear Roman's voice while reading it. All breathy, the signature smirk on display, roping me in with one hand on my waist as he whispered it into my ear... No, I couldn't answer it. Just thinking about it made me blush. 

I had made it to second period without seeing any members of the Godfrey family, all until I had to cross the campus to get to my next class. There he was, not too far away from the football field, leaning against a lamp post as he lit his cigarette. 

Roman hadn't noticed me yet, and a part of me hoped he wouldn't just yet. I wanted to take my time, watch the way his hair fell over his forehead in gentle motions as he lowered his head towards the lighter, the way his lips wrapped around the cigarette, and the way his beautiful green eyes suddenly darted up and landed right on me--

I nearly squeaked, stopping in my tracks as my breath caught in my throat. Even worse, was the cough that choked itself out of me. I hadn't expected him to notice me staring, not when I was this far away. My hands trembled as I tried to pull myself together, catching a glimpse of Roman's classic smirk as his cigarette lay comfortably between his lips. His eyes darkened, a mischievous shimmer in his gaze as he motioned for me to come over.

I was a mess by the time I reached him, and I tried to rub my clammy hands off my shirt in a way that wouldn't give away my stress. Still, I had an inkling he knew, and I only made it worse for myself when I opened my mouth; "Hey, dude,"

Immediately, it felt like my brain was on fire-- what was that? Stupid, stupid!

Roman seemed taken aback by that as well, amusement dancing in his eyes. "Since when do you call me dude?" He stifled a chuckle, taking a long drag of his cigarette; "I know about Romy Schneider, but this is new."

I only called him Romy Schneider to tease him on days he was exceptionally pretty (which could technically be any day), but dude? Now, it was downright obvious how nervous I was. "I-- Okay, just forget I said that," Kicking away a nearby rock, I lowered my gaze, no longer able to meet his. Roman's face was enough to unravel me, especially after what had been said last night. 

Still, he laughed, blowing out a simple ring of smoke. "You're nervous,"

"Am not!"

"Fine. Look at me, then,"

Clenching my jaw, I adhered. My lashes fell heavy over my eyes, my lack of sleep stirring in my chest as I scanned my boyfriend; he was so handsome today, so calm. Roman leaned down, now balancing his cigarette between his fingers as he lowered himself to my level, inches away from my face in a rather intimidating manner-- the tension was so thick, I could probably run my fingers through it. "Is someone a little embarrassed?" he cooed, nudging my shoulder. "Not used to me running my mouth like last night?"

I was relieved to know I didn't have to explain why I was so flustered today-- still, I was being painstakingly put on the spot. "You always run your mouth, Rome, that's nothing new,"

"Not like that, though," Roman's eyes were practically sparkling. "It's alright if you can't take it. Just tell me if you can't."

Can't take it? Who did he think he was? There was a burning challenge in his voice, and mixed with my slight offense, it only lead to the following; "I can take it," I huffed, stepping forward. "You think I can't?"

Roman hummed, the corners of his mouth curving up into an evil grin. "Nah, I think you can. You're a quick learner," He pressed a short kiss against my cheek before straightening up, placing his cigarette back between his lips before leaning against the lamp post again. "You can keep up with me, right?" he mumbled in between a drag. "I'm not scaring you back into Letha's arms?"

Roman said it with a sense of humour, but I couldn't help but catch onto the anxiety hiding behind his words. My brows drew together, watching as he finished his cigarette and threw it to the ground, stomping it. I cleared my throat; "I thought we talked about this last night... You're quite hung up on this Letha thing, aren't you?--"

"No," 

That was too quick to be believable. "Rome?--"

"I'm not," As he turned back to me, Roman's eyes narrowed. I had forgotten how quickly his demeanour could change, with the snap of a finger. Suddenly, he was cold. "Stop projecting on me. You're being dramatic."

Huh? There was no way to contain the grimace that followed. My eyes widened, bewildered that he was snapping at me. That truly came out of nowhere. "What?" I breathed. "I'm not projecting-- Why is this setting you off so bad? We don't even know why she called me or what she truly wants!"

Roman groaned; it was clear that he hadn't meant to instigate a fight. Especially not on school grounds. "Jeez, could you lower your voice? People are staring," His cheeks redded a little as he caught the eyes of a few students passing us by, and he lowered his gaze to the ground, cursing under his breath. 

I took a quick glance around, snorting as I turned back to him. "Roman, now that you're my boyfriend, I'm comfortable enough to tell you that you can't snap at me like that anymore. Or talk to me like that, for that matter. Ever! Those days are over, do you hear me?" 

Roman's eyes widened to the likes of big, shiny plates of china, staring back at me with a look of both anger and horror. His lips drew a straight line and his jaw clenched before he spat pure venom; "Wow... You really know how to make a big deal out of nothing," 

Those words chilled me to the bone. Shellshocked, I took a step back, holding my breath as my eyes drilled into his. Roman's chest rose and fell in slow, long motions, none of us knowing what to say. 

It was at this moment that I heard a cheerleader-cry coming from the football field, catching my attention. My gaze went past Roman and to the team that was practicing, doing some sorts of somersaults in the air as they howled the school's motto. And as we stood here with a clear view of the cheerleader team, practically hiding behind this lamp post, something dawned on me-- why had Roman been standing here in the first place? Why this exact place?

He seemed to be catching onto my trail of thoughts, turning to glance at my transfixion. It gave me a moment to lose face, opening and shutting my mouth as I flailed my arms in exasperation. It only got worse when I realized several girls on the team were waving at him, and I recognized one of them to be one of his earlier flings. Was it the one he screwed back in March? Then, it suddenly dawned on me that Roman wasn't turning back to me, his gaze now resting on the waving cheerleaders and their ridiculously short skirts as he nodded to himself in boyish approval-- 

My heart sank all the way down to my shoes. "Really, Roman? Really?" I didn't expect my voice to be so frail, so upset. 

He sensed my tone, finally laying his eyes on me with an irritated look about him. Roman reached up to move his hair out of his forehead, running his fingers through his hair as he spoke; "What is it now? Just appreciating the view,"

"Appreciating... the view?" I was stunned. Stunned. It felt as though he had stabbed me right in the chest-- who the fuck talks like that to their girlfriend? "I'm glad to see you're invested in the relationship I threw everything away for. Thank you for the reminder, Roman, that you're still just a guy."

With a laugh, Roman was back to smiling-- he was giving me a severe case of whiplash. "What? They're waving at me, it's normal to check out who it is! You know I'm not going anywhere, right?"

No, I had to look away. I couldn't think clearly now that he looked so charming again. Why did he have to be so hot and cold? I had hoped we were past this on the spectrum of Roman-ness. It only got worse when he stepped forward, pressing a warm kiss to my temple. "All yours," he whispered against my skin, placing his hand on my cheek as he towered above me. "Let me walk you to class, hm?"

I had to take a deep breath, my eyes closing to relish in the fact that Roman was kissing me so openly in front of everyone, especially in front of the cheerleaders. Still, I knew I had to gather my thoughts-- the discomfort was lingering in my chest, the creeping unease settling in my mind. I didn't want to let this slide. 

I strained a smile to mask my inner turmoil as I put my hand over his, getting up on my tippytoes to press a shy kiss to Roman's lips, feeling him sigh against me. It was short, sweet, and like a temporary band-aid. So when I pulled away, it felt like I was ripping it off with all my might-- I didn't want to. I forced myself to speak, clearing my throat; "I'll walk myself to class, thanks," 

I could see it in his eyes that he was taken aback, not expecting that I would turn down his offer. The flicker of confusion streaked across Roman's face like a flash of lightning. "Uh, okay... What subject do you have now?" he tried, an attempt to drag out our time together.

"... I'm gonna be late," I couldn't help myself-- I pressed a kiss to his cheek, wanting to feel him once more. If there was one thing I could find solace in, it was the fact that I could kiss him as often as I wanted to now that we were together. "Please find another place to smoke. You're breaking my heart."

That seemed to land a blow to Roman, whose brows drew together in a look of hurt. I was reminded of his promises to not hurt me, to do his best to keep me happy, and I left him by the lamp post hoping he remembered his words as clearly as I did. 

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

And I thought my unease wouldn't get worse. As the days flew by, I was positive, hopeful even. However, staring down at the messages Letha sent me this morning, I couldn't help but feel a sense of doom as I waited for Roman's last class to be over.

Several days had passed since the last time I saw Letha at the gas station, where she had tried to apologize to me. Her words of longing, how she insisted that she missed me and never meant for anyone to get hurt, had etched themselves into my mind, unable to be forgotten. 

So, I figured it wouldn't do any more harm to read what she had written. I had waited all day to open her messages, after all. It was gnawing on my mind at this point-- My thumb hovered above the message notification, and I held my breath as my eyes grazed the words on the screen;

letha: hey... i didn't expect you to answer my call a few days ago, much less call me back, but i don't want to give up just yet. i want you to know how sorry i am that you were hurt and that i no longer talk to Jasmine, but that you deserve to know the truth after everything you've been put through this past month. i know you and Roman are a couple now, since he told me at dinner... and frankly because the whole school won't shut up about my baby cousin no longer harassing everyone. who would've thought?

letha: you were once mine, and i was yours. i might never fully forgive you for going behind my back, but you were my best friend in the whole world. i'm so tired of acting like i don't miss you. could we please talk?

letha: you need to know the truth about Roman. please.

I should've known this was a bad idea. I should've known. Pressing my phone up against my chest, feeling my heart beat against it, I squeezed my eyes shut as the school bell rang. Several students rushed out of the doors in the hallway, and I knew I had to get myself together before Roman saw me so out of it. 

He and I hadn't been properly alone for a while. Although I had missed him and his lips against mine, I was still seething inside about him staring at the cheerleaders and the awful conversation before and after. I was still battling my jealousy regarding the situation; why had he been so snappy, all of a sudden? And why did he feel the need to appreciate the view? Everything about it made me nauseous. 

Still, I didn't deny Roman when he caught up with me at lunch earlier today and asked me to wait for him after school. He had been so incessant, so sweet-- I missed my little devil, no matter how insecure he made me.

I got a few odd looks from the people passing me in the hall as I harshly patted my face in an attempt to snap out of my dark spiral of thoughts. Unfortunately, Roman also caught this just as he stepped out of his classroom; "What are you doing?" he asked, grimacing.

Flustered, I watched him throw his backpack over his shoulder, towering over me as I was pressed further against the wall behind me. Despite his look of disapproval, he still looked ridiculously pretty today-- Romy Schneider. His hair was styled in a classic heartbreaker look, the green in his eyes fixating on me as he tried to find a reason for my odd behaviour. 

"Nothing," I lied. "Trying not to fall asleep. I've been waiting for your class to be done for, like, an hour."

Roman hummed, leaning down to place a quick kiss on the top of my head. "Thanks for waiting. It's nice to see your face," He placed his free hand on the small of my back, leading us to walk down the hallway. "So... There's a movie going down at the cinema tonight, and I think we should go and make out in the back. Thoughts?"

I held back a sickeningly girly giggle-- my heart fluttered uncontrollably, and it was as though all my anger melted away. "Which movie is it?"

"Not sure. Some Serbian silent film from the sixties,"

"Oh... Right up our alley, then," 

Roman's laugh nearly made me blush. Accompanied by the small squeeze of my waist, I allowed myself to keen against his body, letting out a small sigh of satisfaction. 

This was my favourite part of the day. Being paraded down the hall for everyone to see. At this moment, I forgot about my sorrows with Letha, and could suddenly feel the pride blooming in my chest as I got a few jealous, scorching stares from a group of girls passing us by. It only got better when I realized they were cheerleaders-- my eyes followed them, narrowing as a rather evil grin spread across my lips.

That'll show them. I was ready to cut off the heads of the next ones that waved at my boyfriend.

I leaned against Roman's touch, feeling his hand resting at my side. Something told me he was putting up a bit of a show to make up for the incident by the football field a few days ago, and honestly? I liked this. I could live with this. 

Roman caught up with my little feeling of victory, snickering to himself as he playfully rolled his eyes; "Getting high?"

"Yeah," I breathed, feeling my cheeks get rosy as he stroked his thumb along my skin, caressing me as we continued down the hall. This was certainly a high-- one I had longed for. In a flash of confidence, I obnoxiously turned my head to watch the seething cheerleaders, flashing them a vicious smile. Bitches. 

Roman tsked, the signature smirk forming across his lips. He noticed my glee-- "What do you say we give them a show?" he murmured, his green gaze darting back to me, his burning eyes full of dark agenda. 

I didn't have time to protest or agree as Roman grabbed my shoulders, leading my back up against the nearby lockers. Oh, everyone would definitely hate us more now-- but I could only smile up at him and bask in the feeling of mutual thrill. 

"Are they still looking?" Roman whispered, biting his lip to contain his excitement. 

A quick glance-- "Yeah,"

His eyes practically sparkled. "Good," Suddenly, he snaked one hand around my waist as the other rested against my cheek, his thumb hooked under my jaw to tilt my head up-- It was easier to kiss like that, seeing as he was practically taller than a fucking tree. Roman leaned forward, brushing his lips across mine, feeling the coolness of my breath against his skin, contrasted by the warmth of my quick breath through my nose over his cheek. Then, the soft pillow of his mouth pushed against mine, the pressure so adoring it made my blood heat all the way into my fingertips.

Roman had tried to do similar things in public multiple times before we became official, but I had shut him down every time. Before, it would've terrified me out of my mind to do something so bold; to make such a statement in front of the school that I was his, to show I was so dizzyingly into him that I would let him do this to me in public. But here I was-- craving it. 

It was a show of power, and of submission and belonging; Roman's lips were deadly soft, but there was a hint of something more fiery, sincere. My hands quickly tangled into his hair, pulling him closer as I savoured both the moment and the taste of his cinnamon cigarettes on his tongue. 

Roman's plush lips were slightly parted, moving a little as though he was whispering a question-- it was so painfully sweet.

Sweet.

And I imagined the sight to be a gut punch to the cheerleaders watching us from down the hall. I wondered whether they had ever seen this side of Roman before, felt this side of Roman, or whether he hadn't bothered to act as though they interested him. Everything about it made me smile-- there was a sinister satisfaction in it. 

I sighed against the kiss, a soft smile splayed across my lips as Roman pulled away, gently nudging my nose with his before he straightened up. "Could you stop giving me grief now?" he teased, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "Everyone knows we're together. No one's gonna try anything after this, I'm not into the cheerleaders, and I'm dying to roll around in your bed after the movie. Maths always fucking drains me."

Giggling, I reached out for his hand. "Why can't we roll around in your bed, for once? I still haven't been to your place,"

Roman shrugged, intertwining our fingers as he lead me away from the locker. "My mom is crazy, and yours isn't. It's easier that way,"

"Oh?" It struck me that he never actually talked about his parents-- "What do you mean?"

Roman remained quiet as he led me out of the main entrance, and we were now walking hand in hand down to where he had parked his car. It was obvious that he didn't want to talk about it, that he maybe wasn't ready for it. As I spotted his unease, I wrapped my arms around his, clinging to it-- and I was sure he'd have smiled down at me, had the following not happened.

Our steps came to a halt before I could realize why he froze. I glanced up at Roman, about to ask him why he stopped so abruptly until it became glaringly obvious.

Because there she was, leaning against the bonnet of his car-- Letha. Her nervous gaze flickered between the both of us, breaking out into an anxious laugh as she shoved her hands into her pockets. "I thought I would see the two of you here," 

Her perfectly styled blonde hair lay in soft waves over her shoulders, her kind, green eyes piercing me with the softest impact as she searched my face for a reaction other than horror.

I hadn't expected to cling to Roman as hard as I did, but now it felt like I was holding onto him for dear life. My blood ran cold, my whole body freezing over at the sight of her. It was damn awkward meeting her knowing I had ignored all her attempts at reconciliation, and I wanted to crawl up Roman's shirt and hide.

Nonetheless, I planted my feet on the ground and watched as Roman balled his fists, inhaling sharply to contain his disdain; it was clear that he didn't want to see her either. "Letha, I told you not to do this," he said, jaw clenched. "She obviously doesn't want to talk to you."

With small steps, I dared to partly hide my body behind Roman. Free shield, no? This whole meeting had me mortified, wanting the ground to open up and swallow me whole-- I didn't expect my heart to beat so hard, and I prayed it wasn't audible.

Letha cleared her throat, visibly uncomfortable. Her kind exterior started to crack, hardening. "I've just been going insane... I wanted to ask if you've gotten my message?" Her green gaze darted towards me as she asked me the question, and the meeting of our eyes made my grip around Roman tighten. "What message?" he echoed, looking down at me with clear disdain. It felt like his stare was drilling holes into my brain, scanning my inner thoughts to dig out the truth-- I was cornered. 

Fuck. "I didn't have time to tell you yet..." This was downright horrifying, and I tried to make myself smaller as I avoided Roman's burning gaze. "She says she just wants to talk, Rome."

Roman groaned, instinctively pulling me further behind him. I was fully sheltered now, and my breath caught in my chest as his next words came out sharper, harsher, as he turned to his cousin; "Letha, she doesn't want to talk to you! What is so hard to understand here?" 

Oh, so he was speaking for me now?

Letha groaned, rolling her eyes. "How the fuck am I supposed to know if she's the one avoiding me or if you're telling her to? Come on, Ro!" She stepped away from the car, raising her voice; "Can't you at least step away? She doesn't need you to fucking shield her or speak for her!--"

"You don't know crap about what she needs!" Roman barked, fury burning in his voice. "You threw it all away! Face that you screwed up! And for the first time in my life, I'm needed, and I will shield her as I please!" He glanced back at me, motioning for me to start walking with him to the car.

My breath caught in my throat, not daring to tell him no. Not when he was in this mood, definitely not. 

With quick steps, Roman pulled me along with him. "Stop bothering her," he hissed in Letha's face, opening the door to the passenger seat for me. "You've done enough damage. Enough." 

I sank into my seat, not meeting Letha's broken gaze as Roman made his way to the driver's seat. I didn't need to see her to know what she looked like right now-- green eyes probably glossed over, her slender arms wrapping around her for comfort. 

It only got worse when Letha called my name, her hurt voice making it impossible to avoid her anymore. When I finally turned to her, listening to the sound of the car starting, it almost felt as though I was looking into a mirror. I was sure I looked just like that when Letha abandoned me crying on the bleachers, calling me a whore when I told her about my feelings for Roman before she stormed off. My heart tore into a million pieces, looking into the teary eyes of the girl who used to know me better than anyone else. 

Still, did I owe her the kindness of pity? She certainly hadn't shown me any. 

I didn't have time to think about it-- Roman quickly drove us out of the school parking lot, groaning as he ran his fingers through his hair with his free hand. I could see that he was still seething, eye twitching as he gripped the steering wheel with a little too much power. 

"Such bullshit," Roman cursed-- I hadn't seen him this pissed before. "She has no right to bother you anymore. I fucking told her!" 

"She just--" Letha's big, green eyes of sadness haunted me. It made my heart clench, my soul crumble. "She seems really desperate to talk, Rome."

He glanced at me, just for a second, with apparent disdain. "So? I don't get why you're even entertaining the thought of giving her the chance to!" His grip around the wheel only tightened as he turned his gaze back on the road. "But Letha's got quite the nerve to just show up like that... She's begging for you to forgive her so her guilty conscious gets relief, it's damn selfish! It's not about you at all!"

"Why not?" I turned in my seat, feeling my frustration simmer. "Why would it not be about me? Is it so crazy to think she might just want us to be friends again, that I'm someone worth being friends with?"

"That's not-- She doesn't want to be your friend!" 

"Then why the hell is she doing all of this?"

"Because Letha obviously doesn't want us to be together, don't be so naive!"  Vexed, Roman hit the steering wheel with a loud groan-- it made me jump in my seat. "If you think she's forgiven you for going behind her back, think again! This is her taking revenge on me for all the times I've messed with her friends, okay?"

I didn't want to think about him and Letha's long list of ex-friends; it made me nauseous. I resorted to balling my fists, trying to collect my thoughts. "You didn't even let me hear her out..."

Roman snorted, rolling his eyes as he adjusted the rearview mirror. "You're making it sound like I'm a controlling asshole. May I remind you that you were hiding behind me, holding onto me for dear life?" He turned to me, a sharp look in his green eyes; "And when the fuck were you going to tell me that she texted you?"

Oh... That. 

Honestly? I had hoped to get a little more time to think about it. To at least have that opportunity. "I would've told you sooner if you hadn't drooled all over cheerleaders that day," I knew it was a reach, but I didn't know what else to say. As I crossed my arms over my chest, I truly felt how little I had processed that situation. "Appreciating the view, as you said!"

Another groan, along with one more hit against the steering wheel; "They waved at me, it's normal to check who it is when someone waves at you!--"

"I don't give a shit, the thing that matters is that the girl who waved was the one you fucked in March!--" 

... Oh no. He didn't need to know that I kept track of that.

"... What?" Roman's angry expression turned confused as his grip loosened around the wheel, quietly trying to process what I had just said. 

As soon as those words slipped past my lips, I felt my throat go dry as I pressed my back against the seat. Why would the leather not split apart, swallow me whole, and allow me to avoid the aftermath? I hadn't expected to blurt that out; there was no going back now. "Yeah... And now she's waving at you like she possibly has a chance with you, because maybe you like making her think she still does! How do you think that makes me feel?" 

Roman looked like he was two seconds away from ripping the steering wheel off its hinges, eyes wide and burning with fury. "What the fuck are you accusing me of here? And since when have you been keeping up with my sex-life?!"

Sure, I walked right into that one-- I suddenly felt like I had been transported right back into the time I watched Roman from afar. The way I'd watch him throw tater tots at the cheerleaders to catch their attention, the way he'd make me feel small by pulling my hair as he passed me in the halls, and how I had gotten used to the sight of him disappearing upstairs with girls at parties wishing that was me. 

It felt like I was that girl again; the one that kept track of everything he did. The one who would compulsively wash my hands if I was introduced to one of his previous flings through Letha. The jealousy, the obsession-- it was all hitting me now. Especially as I turned to watch him, how his lips were angrily pressed shut, confusion visible on his pretty face. 

It was too damn overwhelming. I realized my hands were trembling as they reached for the hem of my shirt, anxiously ripping at the seams as always. However, through the storm of feelings coursing through me, I heard Letha's melodious laugh as my memories flooded my mind-- She had been my anchor through it all, despite the fact that she never knew about my feelings for Roman.

No, no, no-- I hated how emotional this made me. "I threw away everything with Letha to be with you, so I'm sorry that I'm paranoid. I don't think you get that she was everything to me. But even despite that, she was my moon and you were... the sun,"

Roman's grip around the steering wheel loosened as his lips parted in uncertainty, brows drawing together as his gaze flickered between me and the road. "You didn't know me back in March," he mumbled, still processing. "That makes no sense--"

"I carved our initials into a tree in March,"

"... Oh," 

My gaze darted back down to my lap, checking out what I had done to my sweater. There were a few loose threads now, that's for sure. I almost laughed at the sheer absurdity of it, suddenly remembering how I had gotten so lovesick that I drove my keys into a tree during a walk in the park, carving our initials as tears streamed down my cheeks. It had been a horrible March; I couldn't be more happy that it was over.

Roman nodded to himself, chewing invisible gum--

"Okay... Where?"

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

I never expected him to see this. Ever.

I leaned against the tree, watching as Roman traced our initials with a shimmer of fixation in his eyes. The green of the park was a dark contrast to the light green of his orbs, the hazel and blue nuances being the only points placing him perfectly in the scenery. Like this, it was as though I was looking at a painting-- the ones painted by depressed Russian artists before the fall of the Tsars. They always knew how to bring beauty into a world that was only cruel to them. 

It was specific, sure, but I had to occupy my mind with something as Roman remained quiet. The wait was nerve-wracking.

Ethereal hues of sunlight shone through the thickness of the trees in the full bloom of summer as I kicked at a nearby chestnut. About half an hour had passed since our argument in the car, and another half hour passed before I finally found the tree in a desolate part of the park. I chewed on my bottom lip, anxiously watching Roman's every reaction.

I expected him to be freaked out. To be disgusted, even. How creepy wasn't this?

However, Roman was painstakingly calm. He ran the pads of his fingers over every cut, every bumpy line-- "This is..."

"Yeah, I know," My arms were crossed over my chest, gaze now resting on the grass nearby. "I never thought you'd like me or that I'd betray Letha like that, so I wanted to... materialize my feelings, if that makes sense? Bottle it up somewhere. Pull a Voldemort." 

"A what?" 

"Like, horcruxes?" Confused, I got the courage to look at him again. "Roman, have you not seen Harry Potter?"

He shrugged-- "Isn't it, like, for kids?"

"... You used to be a kid too, do you remember that?" Oh, the hypocrisy; "You've been harassing me about not having watched The Godfather for ages, but you haven't even seen?-- Oh, fuck it." It was impossible not to laugh, and I gave into a low chuckle as I pressed my crossed arms tighter to my chest. "Anyway. This tree thing is super creepy, I know, so would you rather I showed you the message from Letha instead?"

Roman finally looked at me, a blank expression on his face. Something told me he didn't want to give away his true feelings regarding the matter. Still, he held out his hand, and I promptly gave him my phone.

Roman knew my password-- that was no issue. He didn't have to ask for it, now staring down at the message from Letha.

I pressed my back against the tree as much as I could, wanting to melt into it and disappear just like earlier in the car. Watching the way Roman's brows drew together in confusion, the flash of annoyance that streaked across his eyes--  it didn't help my anxiety that he didn't say anything, wordlessly handing me my phone back. 

I held my breath as I tucked it back into my pocket, waiting for him to say something. However, what he said caught me off-guard;

"The tree thing... It's not that creepy," Roman leaned against it, staring down at me with a nonchalance about him, almost as though he hadn't just read Letha's words of betrayal.

It made me uneasy, but I shrugged; something about the beauty of his eyes calmed me down as I gave in to a soft smile. "You don't have to protect my feelings, Rome, I'm very aware--"

"It's not," Stepping away from the tree, he neared me with careful steps. "I know we've talked about this before, but I'm just a little shocked you felt so... strongly about me. Even during a time when I was pulling your hair. It just doesn't make sense that you'd like me at all, even now." 

I sent him a defeated look, leaning my head against the wood behind me. "Why is that so shocking?" 

Roman now stood in front of me, and he reached out to place his hands on my waist. "I just don't think anyone ever has in this way," he said. "It's so sweet, it almost makes me nauseous."

I giggled-- "I make you nauseous?"

Roman's next words were said with such a stoic tone, I froze to my spot; "You make me sick,"

Dumbfounded, I let my lips part in shock. It was almost as though his green eyes were filled with pity. "What?--"

"Sick to my stomach," 

Suddenly, I couldn't remember the last time he had blinked. Uhm...? The way we were standing, the way I was pressed up against this tree, gave me the biggest deja vu of my lifetime. This was exactly the same situation as when we played seven minutes in heaven, the very thing that had unraveled everything. I was frozen in fear of his next words, holding my breath. 

"Knowing you have the compassion to feel this strongly about me, makes me sick," Roman breathed, his hands kneading my waist with strength that nearly made me wince in pain. "That you've fucked up your life to be with me, makes me sick. And that I'm going to have the worst time letting you go if I must, makes me sick." There was an intensity in him that I hadn't properly seen in him before now-- I wasn't sure whether to be scared or turned on. It only got worse when Roman leaned in, his hot breath against my lips making me shiver; "That I'm ready to go to war with Letha, with family, for you, makes me sick. Knowing I'm ready to rip her head off if she takes you from me... Makes. Me. Sick." 

A quiet shiver of air left my body, my shaking hands grabbing at his. "Rome, I--"

"I'll be better for you," Roman's green eyes drilled into mine with desperation, his grip around my waist loosening before he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me flush against him. "Whatever Letha says about me, the truth as she called it, I need you to not believe it. I'm asking you to kill me, in a sense."

"What?--"

"I want you to make me so sick that I die in your arms," Roman let out a shaky breath, leaning his forehead against mine as his eyes closed shut. "I think it'd make me feel good. I don't want to be so bitter and angry all the time... and I feel good with you. Really good."

Oh.

Oh.

My heart swelled as I brought my hands up to cup his face, my thumbs stroking over his cheeks as we stood still. There were leaves rustling in the distance, and a sweltering breeze that passed us briefly, but all in all, it was just Roman and I in this deserted area of the park. I could easily agree that it felt good, that it felt right-- just my pretty boyfriend and me.

I got up on my tippytoes, pulling Roman in for a gentle kiss. It made my heart swell, made the tips of my fingers burn as I felt his cold breath against my cheek when he exhaled through his nose. 

It was just us, and I needed it to stay that way. We needed it to stay that way, to work as we needed to.

I couldn't let nostalgia kill this. Not for Letha, not for anything in the world. I wasn't sure what it was that she was dying to tell me, why she felt the need to tell me the truth about him as she claimed-- wasn't this his truest form?

Roman's hands pushed against the small of my back, drawing me in as close as humanly possible. The kiss deepened with every breath, with every pull of the other-- "Choose us," he pleaded, mouthing his words into my lips. "Me and you. Us."

His desperation nearly made me burst into flames, similarly to a phoenix; Roman would've gotten that reference if he had seen Harry Potter. It seemed I might actually have to watch The Godfather for him to do so. Still, I sighed softly into the kiss, my hands going into his hair to tug him closer. 

I made my decision then and there-- I wasn't going to answer Letha. I could figure out the truth about Roman on my own, thank you very much.

"Me and you," I breathed. "Us."

(AAAAHHH if you've made it this far, thank you so much for reading!!<3333 here's PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 8, PART 9, and PART 10 if you want to check them out!! THANK YOUUUU!)

(and credits to @august-diehl for the gif!!)

tagging those that seemed interested!!<333:

@mentallyscreamingsincebirth @putherup @corawithfanfiction @vladsgirlxx

@iamaslytherin0 @sexualparkour @the-universe-is-complicated @heavenly-bratt

@lafemme-nk @namiusedbubble @useyourwandbro @strmborns @literally-lani

@virgosapphire79 @star-girl-04 @veyzus @ddipotassium

@mil88691 @tloughost @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @katifefe @sn0wybowie-blog

[quintinh43]

Feels Like Home | Jack Hughes

Summary: Jack brings his girlfriend to meet his older brother Quinn and his parents. [Requested By Anon]

Pairings: Jack Hughes x Fem!Reader

Warnings: None, I think, just fluff. Maybe some anxiety?

Wc: 2.9k

---

With the off-season officially kicked into gear, you, Jack and Luke were headed to Michigan to meet up with the rest of their family. As the three of you collected your luggage you bounced on the balls of your feet nervously. Today was the first time you'd be meeting Jack's older brother Quinn and his parents.

Your meeting with Quinn being in a matter of minutes, as he was picking the three of you up from the airport. "Relax, sweet thing," Jack hummed, squeezing your hand, "he'll love you."

"What if he doesn't?" You mumble, squeezing his hand back.

"He will." The three of you grab your luggage and head to the baggage area, Luke walking ahead, headphones on, music full blast, ever the emo youngest brother. Jack traces comforting patterns across your knuckles as you get more and more nervous.

Honestly, meeting Quinn is more nerve-wracking than the prospect of meeting Jacks parents. Older brothers are on a whole other level. You feel bad for Luke, for whenever he has a girlfriend to introduce to not one but two older brothers.

Quinn is leaning against the back of his car, arms crossed over his chest, smirking as he lays eyes on his younger brothers. And by extension you. He radiates, cool, calm, and collected. Somehow, that makes it even more scary.

Luke is the first to reach him, wrapping him in a hug. Luke has a good four inches him, but you can tell by the way his body relaxes as soon as Quinn locks his arms around him that their bond is as thick as thieves. He puts his luggage into the car and takes the front seat.

Before he closes the door, he mouths a teasing "good luck" at you. You glare at him, while Jack lets go of your hand, he a Quinn to pack the remainder of the bags in the trunk before he throws his arms around his brother.

"Hi Quinny," you hear him murmur, "Hi Jackie," he grins back, patting him on the back.

"This must be the girlfriend," he says, eyes twinkling with mischief as he squeezes an arm around Jacks shoulders.

"That I am" you smile, holding out a hand for him to shake, "I'm Y/n, its good to finally meet you."

"You too," Quinn says, shaking your hand, "Come on, let's get going, i'm not in the mood to run into people, especially not with all three of us out and about."

Jack nods, opening the back door for you to get in. You slide in behind Luke, and Jack takes the seat behind Quinn. He links his hand with yours and rests them in his lap, tracing patterns on the backs if your knuckles. For all his trying to keep you calm, he was nervous too. It was very important to him that his family loved you.

"So, Y/n, what are your intentions with my brother?" Quinn asks, fingers tapping on the steering wheel while he glances in the rear view mirror.

The tips of Jacks ears turn a vengeful pink. "Quinn!" He huffs in disbelief.

"Straight to the interrogation." Luke snorts. He looks like the only thing he's missing is a bucket of popcorn.

"You don't have to answer him, Sweets" Jack says, glaring at Quinn through the mirror.

"It's ok, Jack," you laugh, squeezing his hand, albeit a bit nervous, you turn to Quinn, feeling more confident now that you get to talk about Jack. "My intentions with Jack are to love him for as long as he'll have me, which is hopefully the rest of our lives." Jack gives you a soft smile, full of promise, and you pocket the memory for later.

"I wanna be his number one supporter, through the good and the bad, I wanna be there for him no matter what. I wanna take care of him when he's sick and celebrate with him when there's something to celebrate. I want to be apart of his family, to love and care for the people he cares for" you shrug sheepishly, like it was the easiest thing in the world to say. Frankly it was.

Jack looks like he might cry. Quinn has a subtle but surprised smile on his face.

"Y'all are fucking disgusting" Luke grins "I can't wait for you to get married, so I can have a sibling I actually like."

"Get fucked!" Jack says, leaning towards Luke to yank on a strand of his hair.

"Bitch!" Luke hisses, twisting to swat at Jack. Quinn rolls his eyes at the two of them, turning up the music in favour of listening to them bicker. He's eyes keep flicking toward you in the rear view mirror, glinting with a pleased look.

A warm feeling floods your chest. If you had to guess you would say won Quinn over. Now for the parents.

The remainder of the fourty minute drive to the lake house consists of Quinn asking you questions, Luke being a little shit, and Jack holding your hand and being a sweetheart or bickering with Luke.

You and Quinn aren't sure how the got the point about arguing over who would be Jacks best man, but here they were.

"You're delusional if you think I was gonna ask you to be my best man" Jack laughs.

"Shut your bitch ass Jack, I wasn't talking about you. I'm gonna be Y/n's best man. Or man of honour I guess. Right

Y/n?" He asks, full blown puppy dog eyes.

"Of course, Lukey," you grin, ruffling his hair. Quinn picked this moment to chime in.

"That means I have to be Jack's best man?" He screechs with mock offense. "No thanks, I'm wanna be Y/n's man of honour"

Jacks jaw drops, and he stares at you with mock betrayal. "You've stolen my family!" He gasps.

You giggle behind your hand, "well maybe if she wasn't one hundred times better than you, we wouldn't like her so much" Luke says matter-of-factly, sticking his tongue out at Jack.

"Do they always argue this much?" Quinn asks you, "if so, how are you sane?"

"Not usually, clearly you bring out the best in them," you grin, patting Quinn on the shoulder. He rolls his eyes, the slip of a smirk on his lips.

"As much as I love that were planning our wedding right now, I think we'd better save it till I have a ring on my finger" you say, throwing a wink at jack.

"Baby, if it were up to me, you'd already have a ring," Jack grins, winking back at you.

"It is up to you dumbass." Quinn says, brows raised. Luke cackles, and Jack blushes, grumbling about how they don't understand. You lean over and kiss him on the cheek sweetly.

"Don't worry Jackie, I know" you smile, leaning your head on his shoulder. You wrap an arm around his Bicep, drawing gentle circles with your thumb. Meeting and getting along with Quinn had vastly eased your worries about meeting his parents.

As if on cue, Quinn pulls into the driveway. And the four of you stumble out of the car, grabbing luggage from the trunk and heading into the house.

Mr. And Mrs. Hughes are hanging out in the kitchen, prepping salad ingredients side by side. As soon as they heard the car pull up, they were waiting by the front door for their boys. Quinn slipped by them, squeezing his dad's shoulder and giving his mom a side hug before the absolute commotion that was his brother's entered the house.

"Welcome home, my boys!" Ellen grinned, Luke had to lean down a comical distance for Ellen to hug him around the neck. She patted him on the back, and he hugged his dad and smartly disappeared up the stairs behind Quinn for you and Jack to have a bit of privacy with their parents.

You hover awkwardly at the door frame while Jack hugged his parents.

After he's hugged them both, he drags you forward by the hand. "Mom, dad, this is Y/n, my girlfriend." he voice has an edge of nerves, and you squeeze his hand.

"Hi, Mr. And Mrs. Hughes, " you smile politely, extending your hand for then to shake. Ellen all but slaps it out of the way as she pulls you into a hug.

"So good to meet you dear. Jack loves you so very much amd we are so happy he found you" she murmers gently. The urge to cry is strong. Jacks family already feels like home.

His dad wraps you in a side hug, "Welcome to the family." He smiles softly, "and please, none of this, Mr. And Mrs. Stuff, it's Ellen and Jim." You nod, even though you know there is no way you'll be calling them Ellen and Jim anytime soon.

"Lunch will be ready in ten. Why don't you guys go get settled and freshen up, and then we'll eat? " Ellen suggests.

"Yeah, we will. Thanks, Ma," Jack grabs your hand and leads you up the stairs to his bedroom that you'll be sharing for the summer. It's spacious and decorated in a way that's most definitely Jack's.

"Do you think they like me?" You ask nervously, putting your toiletries bag in his bathroom.

Jack can hear the worry in your tone. He pulls you into him, rubbing his hands up and down your arms soothingly, "I think they love you sweet thing" he pecks your forehead sweetly, "almsot as much as I do" with that the two of you get settled in comfortable scilence.

Quinn is knocking on the door, "lunch is ready," he calls, going to knock on Luke's door. Jack is dragging you down the stairs, excited to eat. The three of you had snacked on the flight a little bit, but beyond that, you hadn't had a real meal for the day.

Luke is already piling his plate with food. By the time the two of you are down the stairs. "Better get going before Luke eats everything," Ellen smirks, handing you and Jack plates, respectively.

"Mom!" Luke whines, around a piece of garlic toast. Ellen just laughs at her son and waiting for you and Jack to grab food. Everyone piles onto the couch, and Quinn plays a movie. It's more like background noise, as you all chat happily.

Luke leans over you and tries to snatch a piece of garlic bread off of Jack's plate. Jack pokes (stabs) him with his fork, pinning him with a glare. Luke hisses, shaking his hand out dramatically.

"So rude to me," he pouts.

"Maybe don't steal his food then?" Quinn says matter-of-factly. Luke makes a face at him.

You grin at their antics, used to this particular argument by now. Honestly, you're surprised Luke doesn't have permanent fork scars on his hand. You hold out your plate to Luke, and he grins, taking a slice of your garlic bread. Luke sticks his tongue out at Jack.

After a few months of dealing with Jack stabbing Luke every time he tried to steal food off of Jacks plate, you had started putting a little extra food on your plate just for him. Honestly, you could blame Luke. Food just tasted better when you were stealing it off someone else's plate. You did it to Jack all the time, but as his girlfriend and the love of his life, you get a free pass.

Ellens smile is so soft as she watches. She is so happy for Jack that he has someone as amazing as you, she can tell Luke loves you too.

"Whats after lunch?" Jack asks, setting his empty plate on the coffee table. He throws an arm around your shoulder, and you kean into his side, running your fingers along his bare knee absent-mindedly.

"Boat, if you guys are down for it?" Quinn suggests, stacking his plate on top of Jacks.

Both Luke and Jack light up at the idea. You can't help but smile at the look on Jacks face. What you would give for that look never to leave.

"Yeah, let's do that, Y/n has never been on a boat."

Your cheeks flush, a little embarrassed. "What?!" Quinn practically screeches, "alright that settles it, were going on the boat."

You grab the stack of plates from the coffee table, "oh hon, leave it, well take care of it"

"Nonsense, Mrs. H, I want to help."

"Don't worry Mom, I got her" Jack grins, taking half the plates from you. The two of you load the dishwasher together, while the others get ready to go on the boat. You quickly sprint upstairs when you're done, changing into your swimsuit. You throw shorts and a hoodie over it, and slap some sunscreen on your face.

"Jack, did you put on sunscreen?"

He shakes his head, and you dab sunscreen on his nose. He grins, pecking you on the cheek before rubbing the sunscreen into his skin. "Lets go" he hums, throwing a towel over his shoulder for the both of you.

Quinn is already in the driver's seat, scrolling through his music options as he decides what to play. Jack hops over the edge of the boat and offers you a hand to pull you in. You take his hand gratefully as he hoists you over the ledge. You stumble into him, giggling a little.

He smirks, wrapping his arms around you to stabilize you. "Hey, didn't know you were falling for me." He says cheesily.

You hear Quinn snort, a smile playing on his lips. He's happy to see his brother happy.

"Baby, I fell for you a long time ago," you grin, standing on your tiptoes to kiss him.

"Ewwww, no kissing on the boat!" Luke yells as he hops over the ledge and throws a towel at the two of you for good measure. Jack catches it and rolls it up to whip luke with it. You and Quinn laugh at the two of them as Jack chases Luke around the minimal space of the boat hitting him with the towel.

As soon as Ellen and Jim approach Jack drops the towel all innocently, pulling you against his side. Ellen rolls her eyes at their antics and sits beside Jim, who wraps an arm around her shoulders. You can't help but smile. They are so cute.

Jack does almsot the same, tucking you into his side securely. Luke looks at Quinn miserably. "we are so single it hurts," he pouts.

Quinn snorts, "Speak for yourself, Moose, I quite enjoy my singularity"

Luke rolls his eyes "singularity my ass, thats not even how that word is used."

"Sorry, but I don't take advice from collage dropouts." Quinn smirks, flicking his head so his sunglasses fall onto his face as he takes off.

"I am not a collage dropout!" Luke scoffs

"Yet," Jack adds with a smirk.

The wind whips you hair into Jacks face, and he laughs as you tuck it into your hoodie. You stay curled into his side happily, enjoying the view as Quinn cruises along the coastline. Then he's slowing the boat to a stop, throwing the keys to his dad, tugging off his shirt, and back-flipping into the water.

Luke follows immediately, whooping as his head breaks the surface. "Your turn Y/n/n."

"Oh no, absolutely not, no thanks." You shake your head with a smile, pulling off the hoodie to lay in the sun.

Before you can fully process what's happening, Jack has his arms around you, and is standing on the seat. You lock your arms around his neck tightly.

"Jack Rowden Hughes, put me down this instant!" you say panic rising in your voice. His parents laugh, hearing you scold him with his full name.

"Catch" Jack grins, prying your arms away from his neck and tossing you in the water.

You scream as you fly through the air, the cold water is a shock as you kick to the surface. "I got you," Quinn smiles, reassuringly, as you emerge. He's got a hand wrapped gently on your arm, providing some stability while you get your bearings. And then, Jack is jumping into the water, splashing you and Quinn in the faces. "Thanks Quinn" you smile softly.

As Jack resurfaces, you swim over to him and attach yourself to his back like a koala. "How dare you!" You hold his head underwater for a few seconds, and he still comes up laughing.

"It was fun, though, wasn't it?" He asks, eyes glinting.

"Yeah," you grumble reluctantly.

"And now you'll jump on your own?" His brows are raised knowingly. Sometimes all you need is a push, or throw in this case.

"Yeah," you grin, pressing a kiss to his hair.

The four of you spend hours jumping off the boat over and over and horsing around in the water while their parents laugh, and throw snacks in your mouths from the boat and take plenty of pictures. Until the sun starts to fall lower in the sky, and Ellen deems it time to head back.

You climb into the boat and throw jacks hoodie on before you tuck yourself into his side as Quinn drives home. The rest of the evening is spent in the pleasant company of Jacks family. Eating dinner, playing board games, roasting marshmallows over the fire pit, and sharing embarrassing stories about Jack.

All in all, his family feels like your own, and being with him feels like home.

---

Notes: First Jack fic!! I'm not too sure how I feel about it, but eh, here we are. Thank you, Anon, for requesting, Love Soph ♡

[misshoneyimhome]

For Dad!Willy X reader can we get one where his family/teammates meet the baby for the first time 💙

Honestly, I can’t even put into words how much I’m loving all the dad!Willy content we’ve been diving into lately! I’m in such a mood for it, and if I’m honest, I’ve got a ton more thoughts and ideas—but I’m keeping it short and sweet to make it an easy read 😉 Absolutely obsessed! Hopefully, you’re enjoying it as much as I am, babes 🤗

Tropes & warnings: no warnings, except once again overload cuteness! Dad!Willy x reader, baby!Eliot, meeting family and friends

Word count: 1K

➼｡ﾟ

First Impressions and Family Ties I dad!willy x reader ✐

The condo buzzed with a palpable mix of excitement and nerves as you cradled Eliot in your arms, your gaze flicking over to William. He stood leaned against the kitchen counter, exuding a level of calm that felt borderline infuriating given the storm brewing in your chest. His easy smile didn’t match the worry swirling in your head—a chaotic blend of pride, anxiety, and a desperate desire to make everything perfect.

“What if he cries the whole time?” you burst out, pacing the living room while Eliot nuzzled against your chest, utterly unbothered by your spiralling thoughts. “What if someone holds him, and he poops everywhere? Or—what if he spits up on your mum?”

William’s chuckle rumbled softly, a sound that somehow made you want to both relax and glare at him. Pushing off the counter, he crossed the room in a few casual strides, radiating an effortless confidence you couldn’t wrap your head around. “Babe,” he said, sliding an arm around your waist and pulling you close, “he’s a baby. That’s literally his job. And my mum raised five of us—trust me, she’s seen worse.”

You shot him a look, your nerves clinging stubbornly. “You’re seriously not nervous at all?”

“Not even a little,” he replied without missing a beat, his fingers brushing over Eliot’s downy-soft hair. “They’re going to love him. And he’s got you, so what’s there to worry about?”

Before you could muster a response, the faint ding of the elevator reached your ears, followed by the telltale sound of footsteps approaching. Your heart immediately leaped into overdrive.

“They’re here,” you whispered, clutching Eliot just a little tighter.

William’s hand slid to your shoulder, his thumb drawing soothing circles against your skin. “Hey, deep breaths,” he murmured, his voice low and steady. “We’ve got this.”

The door swung open, and Camilla Nylander was the first to step inside. Her warm smile reached her eyes as she immediately spotted the two of you. “Oh, there you are!” she exclaimed, wrapping William in a quick, affectionate hug before turning to you. “And you,” she said, her tone softening as she kissed your cheek. “It’s so good to see you again, sweetheart.”

Her gaze shifted down to Eliot, and her expression melted into one of pure adoration. “Oh, my sweet boy,” she breathed, her hands coming up to her chest as she took in the sight of him. “He’s even more beautiful than I imagined.” She hesitated, her eyes meeting yours. “May I?”

You nodded, your heart easing as she carefully gathered Eliot into her arms. The practised ease with which she held him—gentle yet confident—was enough to make some of your tension dissipate. Watching her coo softly to him, her face glowing with pride, you felt the tiniest spark of hope that maybe, just maybe, everything was going to be okay.

Michael was right behind her, his broad smile as easygoing as his gait. He clapped William on the shoulder before leaning down to get a good look at Eliot. “Got that Nylander charm already,” he said with a knowing grin. “Though I’ll say, he’s a lot calmer than you were as a baby.”

William smirked, his arm still firmly around your waist. “I’ve mellowed out.”

“Oh, sure,” came Alex’s voice as he strode in, Danielle and Stephanie in tow. “That’s why you once tried to use my hockey gloves to fish a puck out of the toilet.”

“That was one time!” William groaned, though his sheepish grin betrayed him.

Danielle leaned in close to Eliot, brushing her fingers lightly over his tiny hands. “Wow,” she said, her voice tinged with awe. “He’s already got more hair than Willy.”

“Okay, what’s with the hair comments today?” William demanded, running a hand through his blond locks for emphasis.

Alex smirked, leaning against the couch. “We’re just saying, enjoy it while it lasts.”

“Don’t jinx it,” Michael warned, lifting a hand in mock solemnity. “You two could end up bald like me in ten years. Genetics doesn’t play favourites.”

The room erupted in laughter as the Nylander siblings took turns doting on Eliot. Stephanie cradled him with a quiet confidence, her expression soft as she traced the tiny curve of his fingers. “He’s perfect,” she declared, grinning. “Don’t worry, Eliot. Aunt Steph’s got you. I’ll protect you from Uncle Alex’s terrible jokes.”

The doorbell rang again, cutting through the playful chaos, and William crossed the room to answer it. His teammates filtered in, their familiar banter filling the space.

Rasmus Sandin was the first to approach Eliot, his grin wide and mischievous. “Look at this little guy,” he said, crouching beside Camilla. “Eliot Nylander, already cooler than his dad.”

“Careful, Sandman,” William retorted, his grin mirroring Rasmus’s. “You’re not safe on the ice or off.”

Matthew Knies followed close behind, his towering frame somehow softened by the awe on his face. “He’s amazing,” he murmured, crouching slightly as Eliot let out a soft yawn. “So, when’s his first skating lesson?”

“He’s already better than Willy,” Rasmus quipped, dodging the playful shove William aimed his way.

The condo filled with laughter, warm chatter, and the occasional sound of Eliot’s soft sighs as he was passed from one adoring pair of arms to the next. When John Tavares finally stepped forward to hold him, the room grew momentarily quiet. His steady presence radiated calm as he gazed down at the baby. “Future captain material,” he said with a smile, glancing up at William.

William laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. “One step at a time, Johnny. Right now, we’re just trying to keep the pacifier in.”

As the evening wore on, the space felt warmer, filled with the unmistakable hum of love and connection. You caught William watching you from across the room, his eyes soft and full of something unspoken. When he finally made his way back to your side, his hand rested at the small of your back, his touch grounding you as his lips quirked into a soft, knowing smile.

And in that moment, with Eliot nestled safely, surrounded by laughter and love, you realised this wasn’t just a gathering. This was family. This was home.

[sushis-wild-imagination]

SVT How they calm you down when you’re crying (All members)

Seventeen Masterlist (more preferences/short fics) Im open to requests! Genre: Fluff fluff, tooth rotting fluff

→Choi Seungcheol

You had been feeling out of sorts for a month now, the doctors could tell you nothing of substance that could change the way you’re feeling other than the fact that it’ll pass, you’ve just got to pull through it.

But the thoughts in your head soon bottled up to anxiety and you couldn’t sit with it anymore. You freaked yourself out too much. You had an full body check up tomorrow, just for a check up to rule out something bigger. The possibility of them finding something fatal worried you to a point where tears streamed down your face without you realising.

You ended up going into the living room where your boyfriend was. Without showing your face or letting him find out you were crying, you climb into his lap. All attempts of sneaking went to vain, he immediately knew something was wrong.

“Are you okay?”

That’s all it took for you to shake and sob out of fear. He looked ready to fight someone. If only he could fight an MRI machine. You somehow tell him you were terrified of this scanning.

He did exactly what you wanted and held you close like a baby, occasionally kissing your head with reassuring words.

→Yoon Jeonghan

You walked home very dejected and sad about your day at work today. You had this wall breaking idea for a campaign, that a senior pretty much stole credit for and you instead got accused of not contributing your ideas to the team.

It was frustrating because you couldn’t call out this senior nor could you defend yourself. Just a shitty shitty day.

You felt like you were holding yourself together until you could get home to let go. All day you were just waiting.

You finally got home and Yoon Jeonghan, your fiance, opens the door. You slowly walk towards him looking tired and frustrated, a hug is all you needed to let go.

“Whats wrong?” He asked softly rubbing the back of your head.

You tell him all that happened, vent out every frustration in tears.

“Do you want to plot a revenge plan? That ought to make you feel better” he says looking the most mischievous looking gremlin he has. It makes you chuckle. He really can fix anything.

→Hong Joshua

‘I regret to inform you that, after careful and thorough consideration’

You slam the laptop close. Why were you so sad, this university is not even your first preference. It’s alright that you didn’t get in, you didn’t even want to go.

But if you don’t even get into your 4th preference school, how do you expect the better schools to accept you? This thought rallied you head for at least 10 minutes, while thoughts of your future education brought tears to your eyes.

You sit blank infront of your desk, feeling horrible looking at this email.

“Hey, I’m making some coffee, do you want-” Joshuas voice fades out when he sees you.

“Is everything alright?”

You shake your head, while he comes over to give you a hug. You hug his torso from your desk chair. You tell him whats wrong and also ask him for some space, he gladly gives you space when he knows you’re not crying anymore.

You sit alone with your thoughts for sometime, the tears had now dried up.

He had come back with some of your favourite flowers and your favourite subway order. He knew your comfort food and you couldn’t be more grateful to Joshua that day.

→Moon JunHui

There was a lingering empty feeling in your apartment and your heart.

You had rescued a kitten a month ago from a dumpster, all injured. You and your boyfriend Jun, decided to take care of it until its better and raise it together. You named her Layla.

Layla was the cutest cat, it pained you that she was abandoned. Many people thinks its okay to adopt an animal and just abandon it whenever it doesn’t suit them, its cruel.

Today you gave Layla up to a shelter to get adopted hopefully by a better family.

The separation only hit you once you got back home. There was no meowing in the background, there were no sounds of little footsteps in the apartment, it was all too quiet.

Before you know it you were crying and jun was right by your side, wiping your tears with the sleeves of his tee shirt.

“Do you want to adopt Layla instead?” He suggests. “We could do it together, we’ll figure something out”

You couldn’t be happier, you hugged Jun through your tears.

→Kwon Hoshi

He was leaving, for the 100th time. Goodbyes are always so tough with him. He was packing his suitcase to go back to his country, again. And who knows when we’ll see each other again.

Long distance was going to be the death of you.

“Do you have to go?” You ask again, as if the answer is miraculously going to change.

When he zips up his suitcase and props it up, seeing that is all it took for you to start crying about your goodbye in advance. All he could do was hug you, hold you, kiss you saying that you’ll see each other soon.

He sees some snot from all the crying you’ve been doing and immediately offers his hoodies sleeve to wipe it on, that makes you laugh as you scatter for a tissue. He’s adorable.

He lets you keep this tiger plushie he had got from his country as keepsake. Saying ‘we will see each other again’

You can not sleep without that tiger plushie anymore.

→Jeon Wonwoo

You had an image of adulthood and living alone. A lot of friends around you, partying almost everyday, doing something new all the time, hikes, midnight drives, late night snack runs without having to answer to anyone. This is what you thought living alone meant.

But boy were you so wrong. It’s lonely. You’ve always been a floater with friends and never really had one set of friends you could completely rely on. This picture perfect adulthood you dreamt of, needed good relationships. Relationships you found so hard to make.

Your boyfriend, also your only friend in the city, came over.

You ended up talking to him about how you felt, and subconsciously he suggested a walk. He held your hand through the walk until you felt better. You were grateful.

→Lee Jihoon

You needed to quit that job, everything about it was so toxic, the boss was a narcissist that made horrible jokes. You had mentioned you enjoyed F1 and he decided to quiz you infront of your colleagues on your knowledge of it because what girl can like a sport in the true sense. It was solely to put you down in front of people. everyone laughs along like it was a given that you couldn’t possibly know the sport.

You refused to answer and give in, but you were scared it came off as you not knowing the answer to the question.

You came back home feeling absolutely humiliated in front of your colleagues and it made you feel low to a point where tears had made an entrance.

Your boyfriend, calls you once you get home to check on your day, finds a crying girlfriend on facetime. He offers to cone to you but you decline. He didn’t have to come all the way. He just ended up comforting you with words. No wonder he writes songs. He has a way with sentences and metaphors.

You felt better after talking to him, almost instantly.

→Seo Myungho

You’ve been feeling worried and anxious all day, despite the fact that you’re spending an entire day with the love of your life, Minghao, something ate away at you. You heard news from mom that one of her cousins had passed. He was her age, you couldn’t imagine what it would’ve felt like for her.

You’ve had friends die and natural death at this young of an age had you rattled, you couldn’t help but feel for her.

After half a day of observing you, minghao finally asked you. “Is there something on your mind?”

You explain to him every passing thought you had, even ones that only stayed for a fraction of a second.

Hao held both your hands in his, and reassured you that you’re parents are going to be okay and with you for a long time. He validates your feelings, that’s the most important thing, he never denies that the fear is rational. You loved him for that. He cups your cheek and brushed off the rogue tear that escaped your eye.

He ends up buying the both of you ice cream so you feel better.

→Kim Mingyu

“You’re crying?”

isn’t it sad? You were watching this movie ‘walk to remember’ its about a religious girl who has cancer and a boy falls in love with her as her condition worsens. She eventually dies but they manage to marry before that happens.

You couldn’t help but imagine what it must feel like to be in love with someone knowing its going to shatter your heart into million pieces when it’s their time to leave. And loving someone despite that takes so much courage.

You explain all this to mingyu and he agrees while he passes you a box of tissues he had handy. He tucks your hair behind your ears taking a good look at your crying face.

“How does someone cry so much but you’re still adorable, its unfair” he changes subject and makes you chuckle.

→Lee Dokyeom

Watching a try not to cry video with Dokyeom should not have been a plan at all, but here you were, watching dying dogs have their last day at beach, soliders reuniting with family and little kids being the sweetest.

You were both crying a little, safe to say you both lost. You giggle when you make eye contact with each other. He pulls at his tee shirt to wipe your tears that makes you giggle more.

Everytime you cried, dokyeom made sure you laughed. He’d crack the lamest of jokes or pull a funny face, he was adorable.

→Boo Seungkwan

Seungkwan was in the kitchen making dinner when you found a hand written letter on your vanity. You and Seungkwan were on two different schedules at this point, you barely got to see your boyfriend. It was devastating, but each day you pull through, because you love each other.

The letter said all the sweetest things, reassuring you that the both of you were going strong and you’d find a way to be with each other against all tides. It was a promise he made on paper.

Little did you know, you had dropped some tears on the letter. You held up the letter walking into the kitchen, “I love you for this” you croak out between tears and a tight feeling in your throat.

He comes over to hug you, he rubs your back as he tells you he wouldn’t have done it if he knew it would’ve made you cry. It was tears of happiness.

He pecks your lips and wipes your tears with the back of his palm. “Lets eat something” he says and distracts you with food.

→Choi Vernon

You were checking your grades on your phone next to Vernon who was turning the tv on.

Your head was in his chest while you logged into your student account. You were delighted to see all A’s but one C. It didn’t make sense, you had studied so hard for it. How was the grade so low? Is it wrong? Did you misunderstand questions, it was one of your weaker subjects and you had studied so hard. It was a difficult subject.

Without you realising there were some tears in your eyes. You had given it your best, was your best not good enough? Were you not smart enough for the subject matter? All sorts of self doubt and questions come to mind as you stare at your phone.

He pats your head and says you can do better next time. He’s right, there’s always a next time. What’s an accomplishment if there’s no struggle.

→Lee Chan

You met Chan's friends for the first time tonight and you were nervous. You had decided to stick by Chan's side the whole time and try to be the most extroverted you can possibly be. Being an introvert this was a huge task for you to overcome. You just wanted his friends to like you.

You've always been an outcast in school and there was a deep seated insecurity in you about making new friends or being likeable enough.

His friends were the sweetest people and made you feel included in every conversation and even explained all the inside jokes to you. You were grateful. To your surprise you didn't have to stick to his side the whole night. You sighed of relief because you didn't want to burden Chan like that.

It was a fun party and you almost cried a little by the night ended and you were alone with Chan. It was as if you found your people and your inner child was healed.

"Did you like them?"

You nodded at Chan with your eyes a little wattery, you felt stupid crying about something so trivial. But he understood what it was really about.

———

Im open to requests!

[scarlethexelove]

Am I Worthless

Pairing: Kate Bishop x Reader

Word Count: 1224

Warnings: Depression, ⚠️ Self Harm, Angst ⚠️, Fluff, Soft Kate.

A/n: I was borderline in tears writing this. I'm learning that when I am depressed I write the comfort I'm searching for by using my feelings. So please enjoy my breakdown and hopefully it can bring you some comfort.

NO ONE IS PERMITTED TO STEAL, COPY, OR REBLOG MY WORK AS THEIR OWN

The phone rings against your ear as your breath comes out jagged. The call is picked up with a bout of silence only the sound of your breathing could be heard. “Hello?” A groggy Kate answers the phone. “Katie.” You whimper. You can hear her shifting quickly at the sound of your voice. “Y/n what’s wrong baby?” Her voice is laced with concern.

Your mind spirals out of control, spewing harsh words into your ears. Unspoken words by loved ones that aren’t actually true but your mind tells you that it is. You’re a burden too messed up for someone to love. You’ve somehow done something wrong when you haven’t done anything at all and maybe that is the problem. You’re the problem and no one should have to deal with how messed up you are. 

A sob rips from your throat, your mind's unspoken truth breaking you down. Kate’s heart breaks concern flooding her every thought. “Baby please.” She pleads with you. “What’s wrong?” You shake your head unable to find words, regret filling you for waking her in the middle of the night with how worthless you are. “I’m coming over.” You hear more shuffling as Kate gets out of bed and puts on a shirt. “I-I’m sorry, I-I shouldn’t have called. I’m sorry.” Your hand trembles slightly as you start to pull the phone away. “No baby please stay on the phone with me. I’m heading over right now.” Kate exits her apartment, running down the stairs and getting in her car. 

“I’m sorry.” You mumble out before ending the call. “No, no, no, no, no.” Kate mutters as the line goes dead. She tosses her phone in the seat and races to your place. She knows that you struggle with depression and anxiety but she has never heard you like this and she is truly scared. What is normally a 15 minute drive turns into 5 as she barely shuts the car off before running up the stairs to your apartment. She is thankful that she has a key as she lets herself in. 

There you are sitting on the couch, the glow of the tv barely illuminating your face. It’s just enough Kate can see your tear stained face and the fresh tears falling. You're sitting in a ball, a blanket draped over your head, your right hand in a tight fist. “Oh Y/n/n.” Kate rushes over to you but you don’t meet her gaze, ashamed of yourself. She cups your face in her hands but your eyes don’t meet hers. She looks you over until her gaze stops on your clenched fist. A trickle of blood peeking from under your fingers as it trails down towards your wrist. 

Kate gently takes your hand in hers and you reluctantly open your fist. She gasps slightly seeing the razor blade nestled in your hand and digging lines into the palm of your hand. “I-I’m sorry. I wanted to use it so bad. I tried to stop myself. I tried b-but I couldn’t.” You sob finally meeting her gaze, but it’s not what you expected. Her face is soft and comforting. She leans in, placing a soft kiss on your forehead.

“You did amazing Y/n/n.” Kate gently takes the bloodied razor from your hand, placing it on the coffee table making a mental note to get rid of it later after she has helped you. You shake your head at her words. “Yes you did princess.” You look at her as more tears fall. “How?” Your voice is small but Kate just gives you a soft smile. “You could have done so much more but you held onto it. You didn’t let the urge fully take over.” You look down at your bloodied hand, a few straight cuts line the middle of your palm from when the blade shifted. 

It could have been worse. You let those words play in your head. Kate is right, you could have easily sliced up your arms or thighs but instead you held the blade stopping yourself from doing more. You look back to Kate. She’s here and she hasn’t run away. A reassuring smile on her face to show you that she is here and she isn’t going anywhere. She came when she didn’t have to come. Maybe she does really love you.

“Let’s get you cleaned up baby.” Kate breaks you out of your thoughts. You just give her a small nod. She leads you to your bathroom where she sits you on the counter before she goes into your bathroom cabinet and brings out a first aid kit. She gently cleans your hand and checks on you throughout. Once she cleans all the blood away she applies some antibiotic ointment, placing a sterile gauze patch on the area before wrapping it up. When she is done she lifts your hand gently kissing the bandage before she leans in and kisses you softly. 

You don’t think you deserve all of this softness and empathy but Kate makes you feel safe and loved. She feels like home. A few more tears slip from your eyes. “Thank you.” You say softly not even sure she could hear you but she does. Kate lifts you off the counter, having you wrap your legs around her waist. You bury your head in her neck and breathe in her familiar scent. “I love you so much.” Kate kisses the side of your head as she carries you into your bedroom and places you down on the bed. She goes to the other side climbing into the bed with you. You immediately snuggle into her side as she wraps her arms around you. 

The room is silent for a while. The only sounds you hear are your soft breathing and the beating of Kate’s heart. “Why?” You mumble looking up at Kate. She tilts her head slightly. “Why what princess?” A genuine look takes over Kate’s features. “W-why didn’t you just leave? You deserve so much better than me.” Your voice shakes with your words scared of her response. Kate’s heart breaks more for you. “I love you so much princess and would do anything to make you happy. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Be here for you through your best days and your worst. You are my everything and I want to give you the world if you let me.” 

Your tears turn from sad to happy as you lean up and kiss Kate. She smiles against your lips before you pull away. “I love you too. I don’t deserve you.” You lay your head back on her chest. “You deserve the world princess and I will give it to you.” You can’t help the light pink dusting that covers your cheeks and a soft smile. “I want you to have everything too.” She leans down and kisses you again. 

You didn’t expect the night to end like this but you're so glad now that you called your girlfriend. You may not be ok right now but with Kate’s help you will heal and when you fall down again she will be there to pick you back up. If she falls you will be right there with her to give her everything that she has given you.

[sidekick-hero]

Carry you

(steddie | rated t | wc: 4k | cw: drug addiction, hurt Eddie Munson, post break-up, hopeful ending | @steddielovemonth | prompt by @starryeyedjanai "Love is letting someone take care of you" | AO3)

When Eddie opens his eyes, he has no idea where he is.

That should probably scare him, but the only thing he can think in that moment between blissful nothingness and cold, hard reality is "the bathroom at the party looked different." Because he is in a bathroom, that much he can say. There are white tiles everywhere and a roll of toilet paper in front of him and... is that a plastic handrail?

Lifting his head is a Herculean effort, but somehow he manages to do it, even though it makes his stomach turn.

In front of him is a freestanding shower and a bathtub with stairs to get into. The bathroom is huge and sterile, smelling of disinfectant.

As more and more of his senses come back online, Eddie notices several things at once:

#1 He's wearing what can barely be called a gown, cold air hitting his exposed skin everywhere. His back, his legs, hell, even his junk gets more of a breeze than he likes.

#2 He's nauseous, his stomach rolls uncomfortably, and his head is killing him, a sharp pain that's increasing in intensity by the second.

#3 He knows that something is definitely very, very wrong and he can feel the anxiety rising like bile in his throat.

It's that last realization that triggers his fight or flight response and in seconds he's off the toilet he's sitting on, the sudden movement sending him stumbling, his legs wobbling and his head spinning. Everything hurts and he feels so weak. He catches himself on the railing next to the toilet and figures that's what it's there for. Although he has no idea what kind of person would have such a strange bathroom. The last one he was in, at Tim's or Tom's or Terry's party, something with a T, for sure, the tiles had been black and there had been a lot of bamboo furniture and gold accents. It had smelled nice too, vanilla and cinnamon.

He staggers to a door that hopefully leads out of this fucking nightmare. Maybe Gareth or Freak are behind this, to teach Eddie a lesson for ditching them again to go partying when they had to pack up their shit after the show. But not Jeff, he's too nice to do something like that. The next morning, when Eddie arrives with a hangover the size of his ego, to quote Gareth, Jeff will only look at him with disappointment.

Or maybe they just don't care enough about him anymore to pull a prank on him. Eddie can't remember the last time they even talked to him, beyond discussing the bare minimum for their shows.

Leaving the bathroom, he carefully walks down a long hallway with the ugliest yellow linoleum Eddie has ever seen. It hurts his eyes and his stomach gives another unpleasant churning. On his right, he sees a glass door with "Intermediate Care Unit" written in big white letters.

What the fuck?

He turns right and continues down the hall, hoping to find someone who can tell him where he is and why his body feels like it's been hit with a sledgehammer. Repeatedly.

"Mr. Munson, you shouldn't be out of bed," a stern voice calls from behind him, and when he turns around he sees a middle-aged woman in white scrubs looking at him with a stern expression on her face.

Feeling more and more like he has landed in an episode of The Twilight Zone, Eddie looks at her with an incredulous look on his face. "Who are you? And where is everyone?"

She scoffs at his answer, clearly not pleased.

"I am the nurse responsible for getting you well enough to leave this ward as soon as possible, and you would make my job a lot easier if you would go back to your bed." Before he can process the meaning of her words, she continues. "As for everyone else, well, no one else overdosed, so I would assume they're all home by now."

Eddie can only stare at her open-mouthed, disbelief and horror probably written all over his face, because her own face is softening slightly.

"Now come on, let's get you back to bed, you really shouldn't be wandering around."

She gently takes his elbow and leads him to a door with the number 719 on it. As she opens it for him, Eddie sees three beds inside. To the left and right, he sees two old men, both looking directly at him. The one on the right says, "We tried to stop him, Nurse Elli, we really did," in a high, nasal voice that is already getting on Eddie's nerves. "The kid wouldn't listen to us, would he, Harry?"

"Exactly," Harry answered, at least in a deeper, more bearable tone.

Ignoring the geriatric Ernie and Bert, Nurse Elli leads him to the bed in the middle and helps him to lie down again. Only then does Eddie remember that all he's wearing is a thin hospital gown with an open back. Well, he thinks, Nurse Elli has seen worse in her profession than his pale, scrawny ass. Besides, it's not like much of his modesty has survived the last two years of sex, drugs and rock'n'roll that have been his life.

By the time he's back under the covers, his nurse has turned around and is walking back over to the door. A bone-deep exhaustion has begun to seep into his body, slowly dragging him back under, but seeing her walk out of the room gives him a burst of energy.

"Wait! Someone needs to tell me what happened. What am I doing here?"

Embarrassment burns hot under his skin as he hears the tears in his voice, but the sound of it breaking at his question makes Nurse Elli stop. She turns back to him and her eyes are much kinder than before.

"The doctor will be with you shortly. He'll explain everything to you, Mr. Munson. I'll let him know you're awake now."

And then she leaves, and Eddie sinks back into his bed in the hope that the next time he opens his eyes, it will all have been just a bad dream.

It was not all just a bad dream.

The next time Eddie comes to, he's alone in his room, except for a middle-aged man who seems to be the doctor Nurse Elli told him would be stopping by.

Doctor Owens explains that he overdosed on alcohol and coke at a party at some music producer's house and had been in a coma for two full days. They quickly stabilized him, pumped his stomach and gave him fluids through an IV. Eddie is lucky he's still young and his system recovered from the shock quite well. When he showed signs of waking up, they brought him down here from the ICU to free up his bed for someone who needed it more.

"If Mr. Harrington hadn't called 911 and told them to come get you, you'd be dead right now, Mr. Munson. I'm sorry to say this, but from what I've heard, no one at the party even cared, just insisted that you brought your own drugs and they had nothing to do with it. Mr. Harrington has also been your only visitor so far."

His words should make him angry or sad, something, but he can't process them. Not when his brain is still struggling to make sense of the first part of his statement, Eddie’s heart racing in his chest.

"Mr. Harrington? As in..."

"Steve Harrington, he says he's a close friend. He's the one who called the ambulance, gave the operator your cell phone number so they could track your phone and get you to the hospital. He's been visiting you every day since. He also called your uncle, because we are not allowed to give out any medical information to anyone outside of the family. Your uncle should be here soon, I called him yesterday to give him an update on your condition."

His mind is reeling, too many thoughts fighting for dominance and one word screaming louder than any of them in his head.

Steve, Steve, Steve.

How... it couldn't be. Not after their last fight. Not after the things he said to Steve. To his horror, he feels tears burning hot in his eyes at the memory. A memory he had pushed as far back in his mind as he could because every time he thought about that night he wanted to curl up into a fetal position and cry.

"You are a lucky man, Mr. Munson. This man seems to care a lot about you, as does your uncle. You should let them help you. And if you will allow me to be very clear with you: You need all the help you can get. You're young, so your body can take a lot. But it's not in good shape. You have an old man's liver, and your spleen and kidneys are showing signs of the abuse you put them through. The echo also showed some irregularities in your heartbeat. If you continue down the path you're on, your organs will fail and you will die, Mr. Munson. Painfully. So my advice to you is to get clean as soon as possible. We have some facilities we work with, a nurse will bring you some brochures."

Eddie could only nod numbly, tears now falling freely from his eyes, his throat tight and his head aching. Everything hurt. Especially his heart.

"Okay, we'll keep you here for two more days until we're sure you're stable enough to be on your own." Doctor Owens tells him, turning to leave and get on with his day, as if he hadn't just dropped a damn bomb on his head. He pauses at the door and turns back to him.

"And a word of advice from someone twice your age who's seen a lot in his time here: stick with people who really care about you, like Mr. Harrington, instead of spending your time with people who leave you lying in a bathroom in your own vomit."

With that, he steps out of the room, closing the door quietly behind him and leaving Eddie alone with his thoughts.

Eddie doesn't know how long it's been since Dr. Owens left. It could have been hours, days, weeks, for all he knows, too deep inside his own head to spare any thought for the passing of time. Lying in a hospital bed, the nausea and pain raging through his battered body, Eddie finally breaks down and lets the thoughts come.

He's lost in his memories, thinking about everything that led him here, alone and in pain in a hospital bed, after nearly killing himself with things he swore he'd never use. Weed was fine, though he didn't indulge much anyway, preferring to sell it and make some much-needed money than to smoke it himself. But coke? Nah, he knew how epically stupid it would be to even try that shit.

And yet he did.

A party to celebrate the release of their first single. One lapse in judgment while flying so fucking high that nothing could touch him. One bad decision was all it took for him to succumb to the effects of the white powder.

The high he felt after snorting his first line had been magical and he's been chasing that feeling ever since, blind to all he's sacrificed in the process.

It changed him, he knows. Every euphoric high that made him talk a mile a minute, overly affectionate, loud and brash and in love with the whole world would inevitably end in a crash. He became irritable and hostile toward the people he loved, thinking they were out to get him. Whenever his friends or Wayne or Steve so much as looked at him the wrong way about his new habit, he would lash out at them.

He became increasingly angry and accused them of trying to control him, of envying him his success and happiness.

That's when he started drinking, too. He drank himself stupid so that he wouldn't have to think about the way Steve was starting to look at him as if he didn't even know him anymore. To forget the sad look in Wayne's eyes or the way his friends had started to avoid him. When he was drunk out of his mind, he could forget the way the Coffin boys had started talking about him behind his back, could ignore the murderous looks Robin kept sending his way.

Thinking back, Eddie felt like everything had spun out of his control so fast.

It's like one day he comes home to Steve, ecstatic about signing their first record deal and celebrating the start of a new chapter with the love of his life by dancing around their living room barefoot, laughing and kissing each other, promising happiness and forever.

Only to throw that love right back in Steve's face the next day by calling him needy, clingy, and full of bullshit.

He claimed that Steve was holding him back and that Steve didn't love him, that he just didn't want to be alone. He also said that Steve still thought he was better than Eddie, better than the town freak, the fuck-up, the trailer trash.

You don't want me to succeed and finally step out of your perfect shadow, because then what would stop me from leaving you, right?

Eddie regretted his words as soon as they left his mouth. Secretly, he had always feared that his success would cause a rift in his relationship with Steve. Eddie had no desire to leave Steve, because Steve was still the best goddamn thing that ever happened to him, but he couldn't help but feel that he was losing him anyway. Even more so when he had seen Steve's face crumble, when he had seen the exact moment when his heart had broken into a million pieces.

He had wanted to take Steve in his arms and apologize for saying cruel things he didn't even believe. It had been his own insecurities that had caused him to lash out, and he had hurt Steve before he had a chance to be hurt himself.

Instead, in true Munson fashion, he had run away and hasn't seen or heard from Steve in six long months that have felt like years.

Steve looks almost exactly the same as he did the last time Eddie saw him.

That's not a good thing, though. Because Steve had been driving himself crazy with worry about Eddie for months before Eddie had taken Steve's heart and torn it apart right in front of him.

Back then he had the same dark circles under his eyes that he has now. The usually golden skin is still too pale and Steve's trademark hair looks even more disheveled from how often he's run his hands through it. His well-fitting jeans, which once hugged his ass just right, now sit baggy on his too-slim frame and Eddie hates it.

He hates that Eddie could still hurt Steve even after he left. That even from a distance he managed to ruin the only person who ever really loved him besides Wayne. There should be some kind of warning sign on him: Beware, do not get attached, will hurt you.

"You're awake," are the first words out of Steve's mouth, and despite everything, Eddie can't stop his heart from responding to the sound of his sweet voice. Steve sounds tired, weary, but to Eddie's ears his voice is better than any Metallica song could ever be.

He tries to smile at him, but he feels as tired as Steve sounds, so it lacks the usual spark.

"Sure am. From what I heard, I have you to thank for that," Eddie adds, unable to help himself. He still doesn't know why and especially how Steve knew he needed help. If this were a Nicholas Sparks novel, their love would have created an invisible bond that made Steve feel when Eddie needed help.

But this is real life, and no matter how much he loves Steve, there is no invisible bond holding them together. Just an unbridgeable chasm.

Steve is still hovering at the door and Eddie thinks he is fighting the urge to wring his hands. Eddie knows his tells by now and he figures Steve isn't sure he's welcome here. Which is ridiculous, because even at his worst, Eddie will always want Steve around, no matter what crap Eddie tells him.

It takes a lot of effort, but Eddie manages to sit up and lean out of bed to pat the chair next to his bed, his eyes never leaving Steve.

Eddie sees Steve's shoulders slump, some of the tension visibly draining from his body at the gesture, and Steve walks over to him and sits down tentatively.

"So..." Eddie begins, dragging out the 'o'. "What happened?"

Steve looks up from his hands in his lap, obviously surprised by the question. "You don't remember?"

"No. The last thing I remember is sitting on a leather couch with a bunch of people I don't know and don't care about, fooling myself into thinking I was having fun." Eddie has had plenty of time to think about his life and where he went wrong, so he decides to stick with honesty. Steve deserves as much and more. "Someone handed me a bottle of whiskey and I opened it and started drinking straight from the bottle. That's the last thing I remember. The next thing I know, I wake up in an ugly bathroom that smells like disinfectant, my whole body hurts like I've been hit by a train, and I have no idea where I am."

Before he can bring himself to say the next part, it's Eddie who has to look away, his eyes focused on his hands playing with the edge of the blanket.

"They told me it was you who called 911 and helped them find me. They said without you I would have died lying in my own vomit." He swallows audibly, tears burning in his eyes, wondering how he could have cried more in the last ten hours than in the last ten years. "They also said you were the only one who came to see me."

Eddie forces himself to look up and into Steve's eyes as he says, "Thank you, Steve. You didn't... I don't deserve you doing this. Not after..." The words die in his throat and he feels like he's choking on them.

He can't do this. He's a fucking coward, not worth saving. Not even worth looking at someone as good and beautiful as Steve.

There's a crease between Steve's eyebrows that Eddie used to smooth with his thumb and lips every time he saw it, and his fingers itch to do it again.

"You called me," Steve tells him, his own hands playing with the edge of Eddie's blanket. "At the party. You called me from the bathroom. I thought it was a butt call or maybe drunk dialing, I hadn't heard from you in months, Eddie."

Eddie winces at his words, but Steve chooses to ignore it.

"But then you sounded so small on the phone. You called me 'Stevie' and 'sweetheart' and then you started to cry." Steve looks like he's about to cry, too. His eyes are glassy and Eddie gets lost in the way the light breaks in them, gold and brown and green all mixed together.

"You told me you weren't feeling so good, that your stomach hurt and the room was spinning so you had to lie down. Your voice -" And here Steve's own voice breaks, after it had already started to shake badly, and without thinking Eddie grabs Steve's hand and holds it tight.

"I'm here, Stevie. You saved me. I'm okay."

"But you almost weren't!" Steve insists, his voice rising, and Eddie finally understands the depth of Steve's feelings. After all these months, after everything Eddie had said and done, Steve still cared deeply for him.

"You talked like you were dying, Eddie. You weren't drunk dialing, you were calling to say goodbye, asshole. You were telling me all these things that I needed to hear you say for months. But I wanted to hear them with you in the room so I could punch you in the face and then kiss it better. Not like this. Not as your last words over a fucking phone call."

That's when Steve breaks down, the tears finally overflowing and he buries his face on the bed at Eddie's hip, their joined hands pressed against his wet cheek.

"Baby," Eddie whispers, shocked, his own heart aching worse than ever as he begins to run his fingers through Steve's messy hair. "Shhh, it's okay. I'm so, so sorry, Stevie. I never meant to hurt you, but it seems like that's all I did."

Taking a deep breath, Eddie continues. "I don't know what I told you on the phone, but since I woke up I've had time to think about it all. I don't know if I can ever make it up to you. Or to Wayne and the kids, Gareth and Jeff and Grant. If I will ever deserve your forgiveness, but I want to try. I want to deserve it one day. I know I have no right to ask anything of you, but... I will go to rehab. I will quit drugs and alcohol, I will clean up my act. And then, if you let me, I will try to make it up to you every single day for the rest of our lives."

Steve slowly lifts his head from the bed and looks at him, searching Eddie's eyes for something.

"Why?" Steve asks, his hand gripping Eddie's even tighter.

There are so many reasons, so many things Eddie wants to say, but in the end there is only one simple answer.

"Because I love you."

The smile on Steve's face tells him it's the right answer, even more so when Steve presses a kiss into his palm. But then he turns serious once more.

"I haven't forgiven you yet, Eddie. You hurt me too much and I need time. But I need you to stop trying to run away from me. I don't want you to go to rehab and clean yourself up before you come back to me. I want to be with you every step of the way. Do it together. Because if you love me, you have to let me take care of you. You have to let me in, Eddie. Let me carry you for once, like Sam carried Frodo when he couldn't go on. Trust me not to let you fall. Please."

"Did you really just make a reference to Lord of the Rings?" Eddie demands and Steve rolls his eyes.

"Is that what you get from everything I just said?"

Eddie sobers up immediately. "No, it just made me fall a little bit more in love with you, and I didn't think that was possible."

"So what do you say?" Steve asks, chewing his lip between his teeth, and Eddie suspects he's not even breathing.

"It's going to suck, Stevie," Eddie says in a quiet voice, stroking Steve's knuckles with his thumb."Are you sure?"

"Yes." No hesitation, no wavering in his voice. It's the same tone, the same determined look on his face as when he told Eddie "Fuck'em," when Eddie told him people in their small-minded town would talk if Steve held his hand in public.

"There's a bunch of brochures of places to check out. Wanna help me pick the least horrible one?" Eddie says, pointing to the table in the corner of the room.

Without another word, Steve gets up to grab them, and for the first time in a long time, Eddie allows himself to hope.

[biniminisblog]

under the mistletoe | hwang hyunjin one shot

pairing: hwang hyunjin x fem!reader

synopsis: the three times hyunjin wanted to confess, and the one time you did.

genre: friends to lovers, slight angst, fluff

word count: 3.2k

a/n: MERRY CHRISTMAS ‼️🎄🎄 as promised i managed to finish this just in time yay!! hope you guys like it and consider reblogging/sharing your thoughts. have a great day everyone!

one.

this is it. hyunjin was going to confess. after days of rehearsing with jeongin— who played you surprisingly well, it was almost weird— he was finally going to tell you how he feels.

despite the practice, hyunjin could feel his palms starting to sweat, he was becoming fidgety all of a sudden. it was the third of december, just a few weeks before christmas, and he had asked you to meet up at his place so you both could continue your tradition of watching cheesy romance movies. he had everything set up, from blankets and pillows to your favourite food and drinks. it was all perfect and romantic, so he can’t back out now!

regardless of his anxiety-inducing thoughts, he waits for you, and as his watch reaches seven pm, he hears his doorbell ring. what greets him was a bright grin plastered on your face. you were wearing your favourite sweater— which was technically his but you stole it from him— with your hair tied into a half ponytail. he didn’t think you could get even more beautiful. however, time and time again you seem to prove him wrong.

hyunjin didn’t realise he was staring intently until you were waving a hand at his face to somehow snap him from his thoughts. he blinks twice before clearing his throat, reluctantly looking away from you and towards the food instead.

“you okay there, hyun?” that damn nickname will be the death of him, seriously. he only nodded his head, giving you a smile which seems to reassure you enough. once the both of you are seated on the couch, you immediately grab one of the cookies on top of the coffee table, taking a bite of it and humming in satisfaction.

“this is so good, hyun! did you make it?” you turn to look at him, your voice muffled by the food in your mouth and he finds you adorable with your cheeks puffed out.

“yeah, felix helped me— oh, and i made sure it wasn’t too sweet since i know you can’t handle too much.”

“you remembered?” your eyes seem to sparkle at his thoughtful action, and if all it takes for you to look at him like that was a simple gesture, then he’ll basically do anything for you. god, he’s so whipped he can't even deny it anymore.

“of course i remember, you’re my friend.” or maybe something more. hopefully, if he doesn’t chicken out.

“that’s so sweet of you! you’re like— the perfect man. i could literally kiss you right now.” you gush, but then widen your eyes when you realise what you just said. you glance at hyunjin, only to see his face turn pink, suddenly becoming shy at your claim. although he was happy you thought of him like that, he senses that you were slightly uncomfortable, so he decides to change the tone.

“just for that? you should raise your standards yn, or else you’ll end up with a sleazy man.” hyunjin teases, earning a cute pout from you. he feels relief wash over him when he sees you no longer felt uneasy, as well as a flutter in his heart at your expression.

“oh hush. don’t insult my standards, you’re basically insulting minho.”

oh. hyunjin’s smile drops. he tries to regain his composure, scratching his neck to distract himself, and grabbing one of the sandwiches he made for you. still, it was hard to grasp the information he just discovered, which was basically a slap to his face.

“so you like… minho hyung?” you shrug, not being able to look him in the eye as you finish your cookie. you can’t even look at him directly, do you like him that much?

“i mean he’s definitely a great guy, so i guess i do like him a little.” you admit, tracing circles on the pillow beside you, and hyunjin can feel his heart clench in pain.

the atmosphere changed after your confession. you and hyunjin still exchanged conversation normally, but it was like there was a wall between you now, contrasting to the fact that you were only inches apart from each other. oh well, so much for confessing.

two.

“why is he staring at me like that?” minho raises an eyebrow, eyeing hyunjin who has been glaring daggers at him for the past two minutes.

jeongin shrugs and shakes his head at his hyung’s childishness. “hyunjin hyung’s just being an idiot again.”

he doesn’t argue with that because he was being an idiot, getting jealous over something as mundane as your ideal type. it’s not like you guys are dating or anything, so it shouldn’t be a problem. that still doesn’t stop the green monster from coming out as he watches minho look effortlessly attractive under the horrid lighting of their shared apartment.

“well can’t he be an idiot somewhere else? i’m trying to decorate here.” hyunjin finally stops glaring at him, and instead opts to go back to his sketchpad, looking over at all the portraits he sketched of you.

sighing internally, he wonders if he’ll ever be able to confess to you, even if he was given the chance. hyunjin sulks in his seat, prompting jeongin to sigh in frustration. he decides to be a good friend today and nudges his shoulder, causing hyunjin to look up, revealing his pout and furrowed eyebrows.

“what do you want.” he deadpans. jeongin closes hyunjin’s sketchpad and gives him a look of annoyance. “listen, if you really liked yn then minho hyung being her ideal type shouldn’t stop you from telling her.”

minho takes a glance at hyunjin and points a finger to his chest. “i’m her ideal type? no wonder why you’re sulking.” he snorts out before going back to placing lights on their christmas tree.

although minho doesn’t comment much on it, hyunjin knows that information is going to spread in the groupchat later on, and he grimaces as he imagines all the teasing from them.

jeongin seems to realise this as well because he’s quick to cheer him up. “don’t listen to him, hyung! i mean just because minho hyung is her ideal type doesn’t mean you aren’t, right?”

now that he thinks about it, jeongin might be right. suddenly, a smile starts to grow on hyunjin’s face.

“then there’s still a chance she might like me back?”

“definitely! don’t lose hope hyung.” ever the supportive younger brother, jeongin gives hyunjin a pat on the shoulder while minho only scrunches his nose in response.

“you should ask her out to the party chan’s going to hold on the 25th.” he suggests and hyunjin lights up at that idea. feeling a rush of adrenaline, he abruptly stands up, causing jeongin to let out a squeak and minho to flinch in shock.

“i need to find yn.”

“wha— you’re going to ask her out now!? hyunjin, wait—!” and he’s gone. jeongin hears the door click shut and he goes over to minho, not even bothering to catch up with the lovesick boy anymore.

“didn’t he mention that yn’s on a family trip right now so she can’t contact him?” jeongin nods in confirmation as he helps place christmas balls on the tree, which causes minho to facepalm at their friend’s stupidity.

“i guess love really makes you dumber.”

three.

so the second time didn’t work out, but that was totally hyunjin’s fault. he forgot you would be away for a few days, being too excited to finally confess the feelings he’d been harbouring for you for a long time now.

however, it’s already the 20th of december, and you’re finally back. he’s sure not not to mess this up. he decided not to plan anything, opting to just say it.

as he arrived at your place, there was no denying the rush of nerves flowing within him. he had thought about just bolting out of there, and he almost did, but he knew that if it wasn’t now, then it was never.

hyunjin lets out a huff and rings your doorbell, trying to relax by focusing on the peephole of your door. this proves to be ineffective because the moment the door opened, he immediately made eye cantact with your beaming face.

“hyun! i didn’t know you were coming, is there something you need?” you step aside to let him in and he cautiously walks past you to sit on your sofa. trying to calm down his heart, he sees you moving over to sit next to him.

should he just say it now?

“nothing, really. i just wanted to see you.” he settles on saying that instead. you’re probably surprised to see him since he should be busy during this time of the year, so he’s playing it safe for now. however, once he takes a peek to see your reaction, it gives him a boost of confidence when he notices the pretty shade of pink adorning your cheeks.

“i was only gone for a few days.” you mumble out, but you don’t hide the smile that forms on your lips.

“few says too many.” hyunjin jokes. he’s feeling a little more bold now, so he slowly scoots a little closer to you until it feels as if you are almost only a hair away.

you don’t seem to mind the proximity, in fact, it’s like you moved even closer. or maybe hyunjin was being delusional, either way it still makes him giddy.

“well since you’re here i have something to tell you.”

“really? what is it?” this is probably the perfect time to mention that he has something to say too. “oh actually i just remembered i have to tell you something too.”

“then do you want to go first?” you tilt your head cutely while waiting for his answer and hyunjin only shakes his head no, gesturing for you to go ahead.

“do you remember how i said minho was my ideal type?” hyunjin nods slowly, not liking the way this was going.

“well i actually asked him out just yesterday.” you gauge his expression, watching as hyunjin starts to process your words. his eyes widen, mouth hanging agape, and you can’t tell if it’s from shock or disappointment.

“th-that’s—uhm,” hyunjin can’t even finish what he was trying to say, and he can feel his heart literally being ripped from his chest. is this god’s way of telling him that you would never be his?

“so yeah…” you can feel the awkward tension rise so you decide to shift the conversation. “what was it that you wanted to tell me?”

hyunjin suddenly remembers why he’s here, and he looks up to find you gazing at him expectantly with a warm smile on your face. if it was before all this, he would have melted at the sight, but now all he feels is the tight clench around his chest. it’s almost suffocating, he can’t even find it in himself to speak. the only thing he can do is leave, and so he does.

“hyunjin— wait, where are you going?”

“i’m sorry i have to go.” he manages to utter that out before he’s outside, closing the door shut and not looking back, afraid he might breakdown if he even glances at your face.

that’s it. he’ll never try to confess again.

four.

“hyung come on~” jeongin whines as he tries to drag hyunjin out of his bed by pulling his forearm.

“no! i don’t want to see the love of my life and the person who betrayed me being all lovey dovey.” he wiggles out of jeongin’s grasp and proceeds to pull his duvet cover over his head.

“ugh you’re so dramatic— you’ve been cooped up in your room for five days now! are you really going to let some girl ruin christmas for you?”

this gets hyunjin to push the covers off of him and sit up straight, shooting daggers at the younger boy.

“yn is not just some girl, she’s my best friend who i’ve been secretly in love with for the better part of my life. she’s someone i cherish and care for the most, and i’m not going to let you reduce her as just some girl.” hyunjin lets out a huff, making the long strands of blond hair covering his face move.

jeongin raises his hands up in surrender. a silent air filled the room before it was broken by minho’s slow, sarcastic clap.

“why don’t you say that again but to yn this time?” minho steps aside to let you enter the room and hyunjin lets out an audible gasp. he suddenly feels self conscious as you move closer to his bed.

“wh-what are you guys doing here? shouldn’t you be at chan’s party?” he focuses his attention on minho only to avoid facing you, his heart beating a mile a minute.

“we would’ve been if you weren’t a sulking idiot.” minho walks over to grab jeongin and heads towards the door.

“i made yn come over since i know you’d basically rot in your room until new year. now make out!” he shuts the door behind but not before you hear jeongin follow up with a ‘you mean make up?’, leaving only you and hyunjin inside.

minho’s obvious teasing left both of you feeling flustered, but decided not to comment on it.

“hyunjin.” you start, and for the first time since you arrived, he meets your eyes, which almost seemed red. were you crying? did he make you cry? or was it minho? either way he has to know why.

“were you crying? did someone make you cry? tell me who so i can beat them—”

a loud ‘umph’ escapes hyunjin’s mouth as you unexpectedly lunge towards him with a hug. he was so surprised he couldn’t even process what was happening in the moment. he felt himself go limp in your grasp, inhaling your perfume which had always intoxicated him.

is this what heaven feels like? hyunjin’s pretty sure it is.

when you pulled away—in that moment hyunjin suddenly felt a cold shiver run down his spine— he came face to face with your glossy eyes.

“you supid idiot, you’re the one who made me cry— and i’m in love with you too!” you confess.

and just like that, hyunjin’s whole world was turned upside down.

“wha—but i thought you and minho…?” you shake your head in response.

“i thought you didn’t like me back, but minho told me you did. i didn’t believe him though so he told me to tell you i asked him out to see your reaction. i didn’t think you’d walk out on me so i thought you hated me…” you mumble out the last words, looking down at your hands as you fiddle with them. now that you’ve reflected back on your actions, it was totally a stupid idea and you should’ve just told him how you felt then.

hyunjin was shocked at this revelation. so this was all minho’s idea!? he’s honestly not sure if he should thank him or cuss him out, although he feels it's safe to do the former if he doesn’t want tissues in his mouth again.

“i could never hate you, yn. not even if you told me you murdered someone.” this manages to make you giggle, to which it makes hyunjin feel the butterflies roaming around his stomach, just like before.

“i actually tried confessing, three times to be more specific.” he admits, causing you to shift your attention to him as a dramatic gasp leaves your lips.

“so we’re both idiots.” although it was meant to be an insult, hyunjin finds it endearing to see you look so distraught about it.

he reaches out to tuck a stray hair behind your ear amd swiftly kiss you on the cheek. you were stunned for a second, almost in a trance, but luckily you snap out of it and retaliate with a kiss of your own. you both end up giggling, feeling drunk on each other’s kisses as you take turns planting soft pecks on the other’s face.

hyunjin can’t believe he’s deprived humself of this pure bliss for years now, he’s definitely never letting you go—

“hey, are you guys going to come out there or what? we’re still going to chan’s party, you know.”

like glass shattering, minho breaks the moment hyunjin has been waiting for his whole life as he hears his older friend’s annoying voice from outside the room. you to pull away from each other, albeit reluctantly.

you still have lovesick grins plastered on, maintaining eye contact as you stand up from the bed and interlock your fingers with hyunjin.

“i don’t think i’ve ever been this happy since that one time we spontaneously went on a trip to japan.” you say while playing with hyunjin’s fingers.

“i don’t think i’ve ever been this happy ever.”

“oh stop, you’re lying.” you whine but end up covering your face with hyunjin’s shirt and he takes this opportunity to slide his arms around you, slowly swaying back and forth.

“believe what you want to believe, love.” the nickname slips out naturally and you look up, a pink tint adorning your cheeks. you stand on your tippy toes to plant another kiss on hyunjin’s nose this time.

“let’s go? i feel like minho’s going to slam the door open and kick us out himself any moment now.” you agree with his statement and go back to locking fingers before heading out towards hyunjin’s bedroom door.

however as you open it, you don’t expect to see evergreen leaves hanging atop both of your heads.

jeongin dangles the plant mischievously. “you guys going to kiss or what?”

you face hyunjin, only to find that he has already been looking at you this whole time, plump pink lips puckered playfully with his eyes closed. you laugh, caressing his cheek before leaning in to leave a soft, long kiss on his lips.

“ok i think that’s enough.” minho manages to pull you away from each other, making hyunjin narrow his eyes at him.

“no i don’t think so, i’ve waited too long for this!” hyunjin whines, proceeding to latch himself to your side. you only shake your head, smile tugging your lips at your boyfriend’s silliness. god, you could get used to this.

“and you have all the time in the world now that you’re together, now let’s go!”

“jeongin’s got a point. so how about you let me have yn tonight? i am her type after all, isn’t that right, yn?”

minho’s loud cackle resonates the room when hyunjin hurriedly tries to cover your eyes to prevent you from looking at minho.

jeongin, who’s had enough if his older hyung’s shenanigans, leaves the apartment.

it took about thirty minutes before you actually head to the party, but not without another shared secret kiss between hyunjin and you, his girlfriend, this time without a mistletoe.

“merry christmas, hyunjin.” you whisper between your kisses.

“merry christmas, yn.” despite the cold weather, everything felt so warm. you were warm, and he never wants to let you go.

“i love you.”

after three failed attempts, he can now say for sure that the confession was a success.

[thezombieprostitute]

The Arrangement - Part 12

Summary: Jake's done a lot of things to keep his sister, and then his niece, safe from his parent's influence and manipulation. If he wants to keep them safe, he has to marry you.

Warnings: Anxiety, Bad parents and siblings, Talking about abuse. Let me know if I missed any!

Part 11 - Part 13

Series Masterlist

It had been just over a week since your wedding. You and Jake have improved your communication. He's also managed to really set himself up in the home theater where he'd spent that first night. Apparently one thing your parents got right was the massive pair of recliners specifically for that room. Jake swears they're more comfortable than most of the beds he's slept on over the years. It makes you feel better about taking the master bedroom for yourself. Clay had visited again bringing a few duffel bags of Jake's things, including his computer. The massive screen for the theater worked really well for his setup.

While you were cooking, Clay had made sure to update Jake on the status of his family. Things were working pretty well, but there were going to be a lot of paper trails to hide so that they couldn't be followed. Or at least, not followed easily. Aisha and Cougar had both caught a couple of people following his family around that were confirmed to be employed by his parents. Hopefully now that Jake had his computer he could get some better intel on the parents' finances and connections.

But you weren't privy to that update. Jake and Clay agreed it was safer to keep you in the dark about the details. Though Jake didn't doubt your sincerity, there were still too many unknowns about you.

You really didn't mind that they got quiet whenever you were near. Your mind was already at maximum anxiety with Travis, your brother, still being in the Intensive Care Unit. Your parents had been acting unusually as the week progressed and Travis didn't get better. According to the police report he'd been seen drinking heavily with friends before trying to drive home. Usually one of his friends would be the designated driver and keep everyone's keys but, somehow, Travis had gotten his keys.

And now your parents seemed to be readjusting their life plans, and yours as well. The one time you were allowed to visit the hospital you'd overheard your parents murmuring about "he can't be seen like this," "he'll be seen as weak," and other similar thoughts. It made you worried you and Jake would be even more under their scrutiny, set to even higher standards. Your breath hitched as you realized they may demand a grandchild to help change the public perception of the family to one of hope or something like that.

You and Jake were getting ready for your first public event as a couple. You're helping Jake pick out the right suit while doing your best to answer his questions about what to expect, what is appropriate conversation, how much both of you needed to talk to others before you could leave. You know you're missing things. Jake does, too. But neither of you can think of the questions to ask so you establish a silent signal for help. Jake squeezes your hand three times and you either step in or whisper some advice in his ear. It's not a great system, but it's all you can do for now.

Jake hates how he looks in all of this but he knows it's not about him or his comfort. At least he doesn't have to wear the torture device you call a dress. The thing looks impossibly tight on you. He's worried about your ability to breathe. And the stiletto heels have you warning him you'll be on his arm all night to help you keep your balance. Jake actually takes comfort in that because he really doesn't want to be left alone at this event. Probably any event, but this first one especially.

As the car pulls up Jake takes a deep breath and you attempt the same.

"We can do this, right?" He says quietly.

"I believe we can," you nod. You gently squeeze his hand in reassurance like you did that first morning with the parents.

He nods, "let's do this."

As soon as he's able Jake is out of the car and opening your door for you. The last time he did so you were scared of each other. Now you make sure to give him a small smile of thanks as he takes your hand. The elevator ride to the party is as quiet as the one you took together your wedding night, but less oppressively so. It isn't until the elevator doors open that you both put on your fake smiles. Both of you taking small comfort in the fact that neither of you is suffering alone.

After the first couple hours Jake is ready to punch someone, anyone, just so he can be forced to leave since he's not allowed out yet. He's incredibly grateful you insisted on eating a little something beforehand. The food here is barely edible and dissolves faster than cotton candy. He hates the wine? Champagne? Whatever the hell it is, he hates the taste of it but, in following your lead, he knows he has to at least sip often enough to warrant a replacement glass every 30 minutes or so. Jake was grateful to have your weight on his arm to help keep him grounded.

Especially when Charles Blackwood, a "friend" of his from high school, showed up. Charles had been nothing but a leech throughout all of high school but Jake was desperate for some kind of friendship.

"Jacob! Where have you been?" Charles holds out his hand and Jake grips it firmly.

"I've been okay, Charles. You?"

"Holy crap, you're married now? Is that why you finally came out of hiding?"

"Sort of," he admits.

He goes to introduce you but Charles stops him. "I know this lovely lady quite well," he admits. You avert your eyes. "We were engaged for some time."

"You were?"

"Didn't she tell you?" Charles smirks. "Would've been married for two years now if her parents hadn't stepped in."

"For once I'm glad they did," you interject. "You're a conman who shouldn't be here."

Charles gives a small laugh, "well look who finally grew up. Too bad you didn't pick up on what was going on before I got you into bed." Your cheeks burn with embarrassment. "How are those dolphin projects going?"

"Sharks," Jake snipes. "Her focus was on sharks."

"Ooo, nerd standing up for nerd. How cute."

"You need to leave us alone," Jake fumes. "She is my wife and I won't let you insult her."

Charles scoffs, "since when can you fight?"

"Since boot camp."

That gives Charles pause. He searches Jake's face for tells that he's lying but finds none.

"Yeah, alright," Charles concedes. "Just don't ruin this party for me. Lots of other potential targets."

As soon as he was out of hearing range you let out a breath. "I'm so sorry," your voice quavers. "I should have...I should have told you."

"Told me what? That your ex-fiance is an asshole? That's not something you need to divulge."

"No...that...that I'm not..."

Jake leans in so that you're the only one who hears him. "You're more than just your virginity status. I'm sorry your first time was with him, he doesn't seem the type to make your pleasure a priority, but I'm not upset that you've had sex before."

You take as deep a breath as you can to steady yourself. "Thank you for that."

"So, can we leave the party yet?"

You check Jake's watch, trying not to be obvious about it. "We've got at least another half hour."

"When we do get out of here, would you be up for going out for some real food?"

You chuckle, "maybe delivery? Or take out? I'm not going to be able to eat much in this dress."

"Fair. And thank you for helping me get through all of this."

"Thank you for listening to my advice," you counter.

"Always," Jake affirms.

Part 11 - Part 13

Series Masterlist

Tagging: @alicedopey; @ashdoctor; @delicatebarness; @ellethespaceunicorn; @embarrasingmf;

@irishhappiness; @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @lokislady82;

@ronearoundblindly; @thiquefunlover63

[moonstruckme]

Hey! I absolutely adore your work :D If you wouldn't mind, could you maybe do poly!Marauders x GN!Reader who is having/had a panic attack? So they're just really exhausted and anxious, but our boys are taking care of them? If not, don't worry haha

Thanks lovely <33

cw: panic attack aftermath, anxiety

poly!marauders x gn!reader ♡ 752 words

You’re slick with sweat, and yet you can’t stop shivering. James’ hand is steadfast on your back,  fingers spread wide as he drags it up and down your spine. Somehow he knows to apply a good amount of pressure, grounding you here on your living room floor. 

“I’m okay,” you say, to yourself or them, you’re not entirely sure. You take a big, shuddering breath, your lungs aching like an overworked muscle as they expand. “Sorry about that. I’m okay now.” 

“You don’t have to be.” Sirius matches your quiet tone, sitting with his legs crossed under him on the floor in front of you. “Take your time, baby.” 

Remus stands from behind you on the couch, disappearing into the kitchen and returning a minute later with a glass of water. He sets it down in front of you.

“Only drink it if you want,” he says. 

You nod, and you do want, sipping at the cold water and relishing the feel of it in your sore throat. You let out a breath when you finish, setting the glass atop the coffee table and leaning sideways until your head hits James’ shoulder. 

Your boyfriends are being quieter than you would’ve expected. Certainly quieter than they had been when the attack came on, Sirius and James launching questions at you rapid-fire and scrambling to find out how they could help before Remus had shushed them harshly and given you the environment you needed to calm yourself down. You’re sure they’re still brimming with questions now, but they’re patient enough to put their curiosity on hold, just sitting with you while you will the tension in your muscles to ease and your heart to beat at a normal pace. 

“Tired, sweetheart?” James murmurs, hand following the curve of your spine from your tailbone to where your neck meets his shoulder. 

“Yeah.” It comes out a sigh. 

Remus hums. “Your body just went through a lot,” he explains, more for James and Sirius than for you, you think. “Do you want to lie down, love?”

You nod, and Remus reaches down to steady you at the elbows, helping you up. You’d like to think he’s being excessive in his cosseting, but your trembling worsens as you stand. Your legs feel made of rubber underneath you, and you waste no time sitting down again on the couch. 

Remus gets up to make room for you, and you spread out, trying to convey to your body that the danger has passed. You cover your eyes with your hand, pinching the bridge of your nose in an attempt to quell the headache you feel coming on.

There’s a gentle whoosh of air, and then a soft, heavy blanket settles over you. You open your eyes to find James tucking it around your feet, and you send him a grateful smile. 

“Sorry about that,” you say again, though you know they don’t want to hear it. You just aren’t sure what else to say. “Thanks for helping me through it.” 

“Anytime, angel.” James gives your feet a little squeeze through the blanket. If you weren’t so exhausted you’d probably be a lot more embarrassed about that. “You’ve got nothing to apologize for, you know. That seemed…really scary.” 

You nod, because you don’t know what else to do. It was. It is. 

“Is there anything else we can do to help?” Sirius asks, and you’re both touched and heartbroken by the worry in his voice. 

“Thanks.” You give him your most reassuring smile. It’s a small, feeble thing, but hopefully enough to comfort him a little. “Actually, do you think you could wake me up in a little while? I just…it’s sometimes hard for me to sleep the first night after a panic attack. I don’t want to make it worse by napping all day.”

Sirius flashes a smile. It’s maybe half its usual wattage, but it’s something. “Sounds good, sweet thing.” 

You look between your boyfriends, feeling awkward and a little bit dramatic for the past hour’s events. You can’t decide whether to apologize or thank them again, but Remus seems to see the words warring on the tip of your tongue. He reaches over to brush some hair from your face, his knuckle stroking gently down your cheek. 

“We can talk about it after you wake up if you want to, love,” he says. “Just get some rest for now, yeah?”

You nod, snuggling into the blanket and closing your eyes. 

“We’ll be here when you wake up.” 

[loony-n-moony]

do you think you could do a scenario where azul comforts the reader about their weight ??

you bet ur ass I can

Azul Ashengrotto Weight Comfort x Reader!!

First things first, you may have to accept that Azul upon initially learning of your insecurities, whatever form it may take, will freeze up.

He’s still in the process of unlearning his own self-hatred, and he CERTAINLY doesn’t want you going down the route he took

that route of course being trying to overcompensate for his past entirely.

He wants you to be the best version of you, of course, but he doesn’t wanna see you destroy yourself in the process.

Naturally, he consults the only people he had by his side during such a time, the twins. That went about as well as you could expect.

“I’m being serious, you two!” He’d scold, already dreading having even brought this up with the twins.

“But we are being serious! I mean- c’mon, some light jokes never hurt.” Floyd combatted, that same smug little smile of his adorning his face. This only caused Azul to roll his eyes, shooting the eel a glare.

“It most certainly did! All you did was make me angry with you! How is that supposed to help at all?!” He huffed, feeling a migraine beginning to form. He had enough on his paranoid mind thinking about ways to hopefully redirect you from even a fraction of the self-hatred he endured, he certainly did not need the twins being… well… them.

“Well, it redirected your hatred, did it not?” Jade chimed, “Even if it was only temporarily, you refocused your efforts into getting the one-up on us somehow.” He spoke as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. While Azul considered this, he thought back to his overblot, and immediately pushed aside the idea.

“You could always give ‘em a good squeeze.” Goddamn it, Floyd.

After that complete mess, Azul was fired up enough to say “screw it” and do it himself.

He held his usual suave confidence, asking to talk with you, assuring that no deal would be involved.

However, once the discussion began, that same anxiety began to pool in his stomach. He hated seeing you upset. How it reminded him of himself.

Seven knows his own insecurities still haunt him, so to see you in a state similar to his is almost enough to make him tear up.

Despite this, however, he’s sincere. More sincere than you usually see him act, that’s for sure.

Despite how he stumbles over his words, he eventually says what he wants to say. What he wishes someone told him.

“Listen,” he began, taking a deep breath. “I understand simple compliments won’t make the pain go away. No deal I could offer could wash away the hurt, I know that better than anyone.”

He put a hand on yours, giving it a light squeeze. “I truly do think you’re beautiful, if that’s at all a consolation. I look at how you carry yourself, despite the inner turmoil and… a part of me envies that. Your strength. How somehow… throughout everything… you’re still you. You haven’t lost sight of yourself. That’s something I wish I had and- and something I can’t bare to see you lose.” Damn it all, he could feel the waterworks rise up. After all this time he was still a crybaby.

“I understand my practices are… ahem- questionable. But… if you ever need to cry with someone, I have an octopus pot that’s free to you at any time… free of charge, of course.” He smiled, despite him being teary-eyed only seconds ago.

He may not have all the answers, but he’s still there whenever you need. He’s not about to let you cry alone, of course!

EEEEEE I hope you like it!!! First time trying my scenario format, I hope it’s easy on the eyes. More than that, I hope you enjoy, and that you always know you’re never alone no matter the struggle!!

dividers by @/cafekitsune

[tranakin-skywalker]

It’s a lazy morning, the likes of which they rarely get. But with the end of the war so close, Padmé dares to hope for more mornings like this. Waking up lazy and happy and safe, her husband curled around her side and not off fighting a war he has no say in.

Three years ago it felt like a dream, but today she can practically taste the hundred mornings she’ll have just like this.

Hopefully with less datawork, though.

Padmé scrolls through her senate reports, trying to ignore the way they make anxiety knot up inside her chest. There is a slope the Republic is slipping down, and she fears she won’t know how steep it is or how deep it goes until they finally hit the bottom.

Her husband’s face pressed against the side of her belly is so much more pleasant to focus on. He hums sweet nothings to it, the naked metal of his right hand brushing tender fingers over her nightgown. It’s a lullaby he’s singing, she thinks, but she doesn’t recognize the words. It’s in a language she’s only heard him speak a handful of times, so much softer and sweeter than Huttese could ever sound. She likes his voice when he speaks it.

“What are you doing?” she murmurs, no longer able to focus on her reports.

The hand against her stomach pauses. "I want them to know I'm here, that I love them.” She can feel Anakin swallow, his throat bobbing against her side. Softly, he adds, “I want to make sure they know my voice… just in case.”

It breaks her heart, hearing him say things like that. Implying in any shape or form that he might die out there fighting. That he might ever die at all. She cannot imagine her life without him.

The hand not holding her datapad finds his scalp. Padmé runs her fingers through his hair, savoring the feeling of him there, beside her. Where he is supposed to be.

“They’ll know you,” she promises. 

Anakin hums, the sound reverberating against her stomach. She feels the baby inside her shift. His thumb starts rubbing soothing circles over it again, and the movement inside her settles.

“I never thought I’d get to be a father,” he whispers, soft enough she almost misses it. “Even as a kid, back on Tatooine, I just... it wasn't something I thought I'd be able to have.” The metal fingers press in a little firmer. Not painful, never painful. Just holding her in that desperate, adoring way of his. Like he can’t quite believe that she’s real. Like she’ll disappear between his fingers if he doesn’t hold in. 

“I wanted to, though,” he continues. “Be a dad.” The next breath he takes shudders out of his chest. “I thought the closest thing I would get was having a padawan. And even that... I didn't think the council would let me... let me take on a padawan..."

Hurt lingers in the silence. Padmé knows he’d been so terrified when he was first given Ahsoka. Scared out of his mind that he was going to ruin her, somehow. She thinks there’s a part of him that thinks he did. That blames himself for what happened. 

"We need to tell Ahsoka when she gets back…” he finally says, fingers curling. “She needs to know she's going to be a big sister."

@padme-amidalanaberrie asked for some soft Anidala so here you go

[frvnkcastles]

hiii, can you pls make one where reader have anorexia and frank helps her to eat? i love the way you write

❤️

SAY YOU’LL STAY ➵ F. CASTLE

Summary: You struggle with eating, and Frank wants to help.

Warnings: Unspecified eating disorder, feminine nicknames, brief mentions of Frank’s loss, language

Word count: 1.2k

Author’s note: Thank you for your kind words anon! I struggle with binge eating myself so I wanted to kind of pour my own experiences into this as well and that’s why I never specify what eating disorder the reader struggles with, just that she does struggle with one. Hopefully that also makes this relatable to a wider audience. I like to think that Frank is a good cook, just doesn’t really cook until you come along and suddenly he has someone to do it for. And he’d help you with your disordered eating step by step. <3

You stared at yourself in the mirror, scrutinizing every detail of your outfit, doubting the way you looked — but one glance at your disarrayed closet confirmed that you had been through all the potential looks already, and you needed to just accept this one as what it was. Exhaling deeply, you smoothed your shirt down and hesitated before finally just grabbing your keys and phone from the dresser and heading for the front door.

When Frank had asked you out on a date, you had been over the moon. You had been not-so-subtly into him for a long time, but you had never made a move in the fear that he didn’t feel the same way, so when he had done it for you, your heart had sung. It was the first time in a long time for both of you, and neither of you really knew how to act. Somehow, though, all your enthusiasm had been sucked out of you when he had suggested dinner at his place. In hindsight, it would have been so easy to propose something else, but in the moment you had frozen and simply agreed to his idea.

And just like that, it turned from an exciting first date with the man you were head over heels for, into a meal you dreaded. You weren’t able to see the date for what it was — you fixated on the eating aspect of the upcoming evening, and it was consuming your brain. You weren’t even nervous about being alone with Frank anymore, you were just worried about eating.

Still, you showed up on time, your heart momentarily soaring again when Frank met you at the door with a subtle smile and rolled-up sleeves. He looked beyond handsome, and before you could begin to doubt your own outfit and how your body looked in it, he had washed away your anxieties.

”You look stunnin’. Come in, sweetheart”, he praised while guiding you into his small but cozy apartment, and fiddling with your fingers, you thanked him and flashed a shy smile at him that pleased him all too much. He wasn’t going to admit to it so early on, but he was nervous too, more than was visible from his confident appearance — he really liked you, and to have this chance was irreplaceable to him.

Frank ushered you to sit at the dining table where he had already gathered his pots and pans, displaying an entire feast for the two of you, and your heart sank. It was so much food, and all of it looked so well-made and it only teared you apart on the inside even more. He had put so much effort into this date, and you weren’t sure you could get through one bite.

Frank was completely oblivious to the inner turmoil storming inside of you, his usually quiet self doing all the work to make small talk while piling food onto his plate. He offered some for you, and you weakly agreed, feeling sick to your stomach as the heaps of food built over your plate, certain that it was going to force an ugly side out of you that you weren’t ready for Frank to see.

Eventually, you realized that chatting with him was actually a great way to distract yourself from the food in front of you. You could blame not eating on getting lost in the conversation, make a joke about it, anything to get out unscathed. And for a moment there, you really did enjoy yourself — you enjoyed Frank’s company, the way he treated you with such kindness and gentleness, always respectful and interested in hearing more about you.

But unsurprisingly, he did realize that the food wasn’t disappearing from your plate.

”The food not to your likin’, sweetheart? I did ask you for your preferences”, he approached the subject with care, as he always did with you, and you felt awkward heat crawl to your cheeks because of being called out.

”It all looks great, Frankie. I guess I just lost my appetite”, you chuckled nervously, rubbing the back of your neck before pushing the plate a little further away from yourself.

Tilting his head to meet your eye, Frank licked his lips. ”Sure that’s all? You’ve seemed a little… I dunno, on edge all night. Here I was thinkin’ it’s just my handsome face but maybe there’s somethin’ else on your mind”, he made a half-hearted joke, but the frown on his face was truly concerned for your well-being, and it only twisted the knife in your heart.

”It’s not really a first-date topic”, you spoke quietly, suddenly feeling utterly ashamed, but Frank was quick to reassure you, his hand shooting from under the table to cover yours in a protective hold.

”Hey, I’ve already opened up about losin’ my family which ain’t exactly wholesome conversation material, either. Not gon’ pressure you into anythin’, but just sayin’. You can talk to me, sweetheart”, his voice was full of understanding, and god, if it didn’t melt your racing heart.

You swallowed. You supposed you did owe him an explanation, and he was right, he had opened up to you about his biggest losses and faults. If you two were to have any kind of relationship, it needed to be equal. And so, you took in a deep breath.

”I—I struggle with eating. Have for years. I don’t have a very healthy relationship with food and I’m afraid if I eat this admittedly delicious-looking meal, I’m going to spiral so hard out of control that it’ll wreck me entirely”, you admitted, all in one slurred speech, your eyes cast downwards as you waited for Frank to withdraw his hand and look at you in an entirely different light.

But he didn’t. His hand stayed firmly where it was, supporting you as he processed what you had told him.

”Shit, sweetheart. I can’t say it’s a topic I know a lot about, but I do know that I wouldn’t let you spiral like that. I wanna help, so whatever I can do, you just tell me, aight?” he promised, and silently, you nodded. You both sat in silence for a while, and he strongly felt like what he had said wasn’t enough. So, he continued. ”Doesn’t make you any less amazin’ in my eyes. You’re still a strong, gorgeous lady I’m kinda fallin’ real hard for. And I’d like to learn more so I can support you however you need me to.”

You finally met his eye, looking up with genuine amazement and wonder in your gaze. How could someone be so understanding, so kind, so… perfect? And how did you get so lucky to be here with him?

”I’d like to try the food”, you started carefully, and the joy that bloomed on Frank’s made you giddy on the inside. ”But will you be the voice of reason when I start to regret it? I—I really don’t want to make it your responsibility—”, you stuttered, but Frank swiftly intervened.

”Sweetheart, I promise I’ll be here for you. I won’t let your thoughts win this round”, he assured you, and softly, you broke into a smile.

”Thanks, Frankie. For supporting me and for cooking. This has been a really nice date”, you squeezed his hand with sincerity, and returning the smile, Frank reached with his other hand to brush a stray hair away from your face.

”Any time, gorgeous.”