#and hope that you'll just call them up send a hey can we talk text and it'll be the same

[number1jeonginstan]

A/N: I did my own thing with regard to this request as well as tried a different style of writing. I wanted to implement him being sweet and gentle as he stalked you. But idk if I really did that. This was fun to write though, and my requests are once again open so please send me something. I hope y'all enjoy it so please don't be shy and comment or reblog with your opinions because I would love to hear them - ju <3

wc: 9k (what if I told y'all I wrote this all in less than one day with sleep.)

pairing:morethankinda stalker!Felix x afab!reader

DNI if you are uncomfortable with reader giving in kind of easily. This is meant to be a stalker fic, so if you feel uncomfortable, please do not interact. I made this more dubcon because reader does give her consent, but I do not want to make anyone uncomfortable!

warnings: porn WITH a plot (like 2.5k words of smut...), kinda Stockholm syndrome, oral!fem receiving, unprotected sex, creampie, panty sniffing, edging, idk what else!

“Who orders pineapple juice at a coffee shop?” you giggled looking at Felix as he started making an ice americano for the next customer in line. 

"Someone who doesn't want caffeine and enjoys the taste of tropical fruit, I guess." 

"Or a weirdo!" you giggled before calling out the drink for Christopher.

He chuckled along with you, enjoying the banter. His eyes watched you closely as you called out the drink, taking in every detail of your movements.

"Hey, weird can be good sometimes. Adds some spice to life, right?"

"Yeah, as long as they aren't creepy. My best friend's ex used to follow her after they broke up, even texting her from new phone numbers" You frowned before working on your next drink. 

He nodded, a frown of feigned concern on his face. 

In truth, he found himself growing more fascinated with you the more you talked. He only applied for the job to get closer to you.

The first time Felix came into “The View” he saw you smiling ever so brightly, giving this little girl a free cup of hot chocolate. From that moment on, he knew he had to get to know you, no matter the cost. 

He bribed the hiring manager with a batch of his homemade brownies. In exchange for a job, he had to make at least one batch a day. He didn’t mind working overtime, as long as he was close to you. 

He snapped out of his thoughts, finally responding to you. "That's horrible. No one deserves to be stalked like that. I hope she's doing better now."

"She is, she was really straight with him after the second time, and he stopped which is good, but sometimes I feel like I'm being watched. I don’t know how to explain it, but especially when my shift ends whenever we are working together. Maybe it's just in my head" you sighed before calling out for the next customer.

He tried to act nonchalant, but his mind was racing. Was he that obvious? Was he being too creepy? 

"I hope it's just in your head," he said, his voice barely above a whisper, eyes fixated on you as you called out to the next customer, trying to look away before you noticed him practically staring.

"Yeah, me too. Who knows, maybe I'm just being delusional," you sighed, too caught up in your own world, thinking about the late-night fear of constantly being watched. You were so distracted that you didn't even realize you had almost gripped the machine's steam frother with your bare hand.

His eyes widened as he noticed your hand grasping for the frother without a cloth. He quickly reached out to stop you, grabbing your hand gently but firmly, his touch lingering for a moment longer than necessary. "Hey, watch out, you'll burn yourself!"

"Oh shit, thanks Lixie, I don’t know what I would do without you" you muttered, snapping yourself out of it and getting back to the drink at hand. 

He held onto your hand for a moment longer, enjoying the feel of your skin. He reluctantly let go and smiled at you, trying to act casual. "Lixie," the nickname rolled off your tongue, making his heart flutter. "No problem, just don't want you hurting yourself, you know?"

"I got it, I was just too in my head. I wish there was someone I could walk home with so I would no longer feel so terrified" you sighed, making sure there were no other orders to be completed before ranting away to Felix.

His heart skipped a beat as you confessed your desire to have someone walk you home. He saw his chance and took it. He pretended to be deep in thought, contemplating something before speaking. 

"You know, I don't mind walking you home after our shift ends. If it makes you feel safer."

"You would do that for me?" you asked excitedly, thankful for him. 

He nodded quickly, his smile growing wider. He had to control himself not to seem too eager. This is his chance to be closer to you. 

"Yeah, of course. I mean, it's the least I can do. I don't want you to be scared walking home alone at night."

"Thank you so much Lixie!" you grinned, watching the way he reciprocated your smile. His freckles shine extra bright.

He chuckled softly as you thanked him, his heart-warming as you called him “Lixie”. He found himself smiling more than usual, enjoying the way the nickname sounded coming from your lips.

"No problem, really. It’ll be nice to have some company on the walk home too”.

"I hope it's not out of your way though, I don't even know where you live" you pouted, unsure if letting him walk you home would cause him too much trouble.

He chuckled, seeing your pout and finding it adorable. He reassured you with a wave of his hand. 

"Don't worry about it, it's not out of my way at all. And if it was, I wouldn't mind." 

In truth, he was willing to walk the extra mile (literally) to be able to spend a few more moments with you.

"Are you a hundred percent sure?" too scared that you were inconveniencing him due to your paranoia. 

He nodded, his expression gentle and sincere as he looked into your eyes.

 "I'm absolutely sure. I wouldn't offer if I didn't mean it. I want you to feel safe, and if walking you home is what it takes, then I'm more than happy to do so."

He smiled, feeling a twinge of guilt about his actual motives, but pushing it away. All that mattered to him was being close to you. He took another glance at his watch, noticing that it was almost time to clock out. 

"Actually, our shift is almost done. Ready to head out?"

"We have to make a batch of brownies first though?"  

You looked at him a bit puzzled, not understanding that it was his eagerness that was causing him to forget all about his obligation.  You just chalked it off to him always being a bit forgetful since you became friends with him.

It was a common occurrence, whether it be forgetting to add mocha to a drink or a whole batch of cookies in the oven, Felix always seemed to be just a tad distracted. 

He mentally slapped himself for being so caught up in the moment that he forgot about the brownies. He tried to play it cool. "Right right, I almost forgot about that." 

He chuckled sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "We do that first, then close shop."

"Let's get to it then!" you giggled, walking to the front and locking it, turning over the kitten 'Open!' sign that your manager Lee Know had bought before rushing back towards him following him into the cafe's kitchen. 

He followed you into the kitchen, his heart fluttering as he listened to your giggles. Once in the kitchen, he quickly gathered the ingredients for the brownies, setting them on the workbench. 

"Okay, I'll start getting everything measured. Can you preheat the oven?"

“You got it Lix!” you replied back, quickly preheating the oven to 350. 

He smiled at your reply, feeling more and more relaxed in your presence. As he started measuring out the ingredients, he occasionally glanced at you, watching as you preheated the oven. He found himself mesmerized by your every little movement.

"Isn't that too much chocolate Lix?" you asked looking at the bowl that he usually double-broiled the chocolate in.

He glanced down at the bowl, realizing he had indeed put in almost too much chocolate. 

"Oh, right... maybe I got a bit carried away there." He chuckled sheepishly, a slight blush creeping up on his cheeks as he began to measure out a more appropriate amount of chocolate.

"I mean you can never have too much chocolate!" you grinned before eating the excess piece he had taken out, popping it into your mouth. 

He couldn't help but laugh when you ate the excess piece of chocolate, finding your antics adorable. His eyes lingered on your lips as you popped it into your mouth, silently wishing he could be the one feeding you the chocolate.

"You're right, but we still need some chocolate left for the brownies," he joked, his smile widening.

With a playful nudge, he continued measuring the correct amount of chocolate, his gaze flicking back to you. 

"But hey, maybe I could save a few extra pieces for us for some late-night chocolate indulgence, just between you and me."

"I like the way you think Lee Felix" 

You fed him a piece whilst taking another one for yourself, savoring the sweet taste of Hershey’s chocolate. Since you��ve begun helping him bake his brownies, he’s always been adamant about only using Hershey.

His heart skipped a beat as you fed him the piece of chocolate, the sweetness of it almost as sweet as the feeling of your touch. He felt a warm rush of pleasure run through him as he took the chocolate from your hand, his eyes never leaving yours. 

"I do have some good ideas every now and then," he replied, his voice soft and a hint of a cheeky smile playing on his lips.

You continued to help Felix with both the measuring and mixing, not trusting the stand mixer seeing as you didn't want to incorporate too much gluten into the brownies themselves. The two of you laughed away as you finished mixing and pouring the batter into their respective pans.

After the two of you finished pouring the batter into the pans and setting them in the oven, Felix couldn't help but stare at you as you both laughed together about past customers, especially the one who tried to jump over the counter to steal Lix’s brownie recipe.

 The sound of your laughter was like music to his ears, and his heart ached with a desire to keep making you laugh like this every day.

"I have to say," he said, his voice slightly hesitant, "making these brownies is always more enjoyable when you're here. You make everything better."

"Wow thanks, Lix, you are always so sweet" You pinched his cheeks admiring how squishy they were. 

Felix chuckled at your gesture, feeling his cheeks heat up underneath your pinch. He couldn't help but notice how close you were to him, your touches sending small jolts of electricity through his body.

He then looked away, pretending to busy himself by cleaning up the workstation, his heart still racing from your touch. In reality, all he wanted to do was pull you closer and just hold you, but he knew he had to control himself.

“Let me help you!” 

You didn’t want him to do everything himself, especially after he was the one who offered to walk you home, it was the least you could do. 

He was touched by your eagerness to help, his heart melting at your thoughtfulness. He wanted to tell you that he didn't mind doing it himself, but the words got stuck in his throat as he looked at your determined expression. Instead, he simply gave you a small smile. 

"Alright, if you insist," he said, handing you a cloth to wipe down the counter.

It was a sight he was used to. Every night after the two of you closed shop, you bid him a quick farewell, and he would follow you home. He was always 20 steps behind, his hood covering his face just in case. 

Unbeknownst to you, he would watch you through your kitchen window. His eyes fixated on your every move. He knew so many of your habits by now, like the way you used utensils to sing along to whatever was playing in your headphones. Or the way you always drank green tea instead of coffee, letting it steep in your owl mug. He would watch you for hours, no matter the weather, just to get the smallest peak into your life. 

He had become a little obsessed, in all honesty. He found himself unable to tear himself away from the view of you going about your day, his heart and mind fully fixated on you. Every time he peered into your kitchen window, he felt a mix of guilt and excitement. 

The guilt, of course, came from the fact that he was practically stalking you, but the excitement came from the opportunity to see you again, even if it was from afar.

He hated himself for it, but he couldn’t help it. The need to see you, to be near you was too strong to resist.

“Hey Lixie, I think we are pretty much done, are you ready to go?" you asked, pulling the brownies out of the oven directly putting saran wrap on them, and putting them in the fridge so they could get a thick crackle on them by the time Lee Know was supposed to come in and cut them for the morning rush. 

He was abruptly snapped out of his thoughts by the sound of your voice, his eyes snapping up to meet yours. For a moment, he just stared at you, his mind in a daze. 

"Uh, right..." he said, trying to compose himself. "Yeah, we're all done. Let's go."

As he watched you put on your jacket, he couldn't help but take in your every movement, his heart rate increasing once again. He felt a strange mix of excitement and nerves as he realized he was actually going to walk you home, something he had been secretly dreaming of for weeks now.

“You ready to lock up?” you asked, your head cocking to the side as you jingled the keys in front of him, ushering him to leave the building. 

"Yeah, yeah," he muttered, clearing his throat. "Let's get going." 

He reached out and took the keys from your hand, his fingers brushing against yours for a brief moment. It felt like an electric shock running through his body, and he instinctively pulled back, hoping you didn't notice the effect your touch had on him.

The two of you began walking side by side, the silence of the world around you causing you peace. You could no longer feel the lingering eyes that roamed your body as you had for the past few months. Instead, you felt a sense of comfort as you walked beside Felix. 

He swallowed hard, his mouth suddenly feeling very dry. He was just so aware of your presence, the subtle scent of your perfume, the way your shoulder occasionally brushed against his...it was driving him crazy. It was too silent for his liking so he urged to start a conversation with you, anything to break the tension. 

"Um, so...how's your day been?" he finally managed to ask, wincing inwardly at how lame it sounded.

"Lixie, we had the same day?" 

You chuckled at his antics, your own breath stable compared to his harsh breathing as he just blinked at you, unable to process what you had just said. 

"Hello? Earth to Lee Yongbok Felix, you alive in there?"

He blinked again, his brain finally catching up with what you had said. He chuckled nervously, feeling a bit embarrassed. 

"Right...sorry, I guess I'm just a little tired." 

He mentally kicked himself for being so obvious. He couldn't let on how much your presence affected him. He was supposed to act cool and casual like nothing was going on inside his head. But he was finding it increasingly difficult to do so with every step he took next to you.

"That's your apartment isn't it?" he asked pointing up to your building. The two of you were just a couple hundred feet away from it. 

"Yeah, it is, how did you know?" you asked, a confused look on your face.

You had never brought Felix to your apartment, in a matter of fact, the only people who knew where you lived were your parents, a couple of close friends, and Lee Know because it was on your resume. 

Felix froze, his heart skipping a beat. 

He had let slip that he knew where you lived without realizing it. He mentally cursed himself, trying to think of a quick explanation. He couldn't let you know he had been the one following you home every night. That would be creepy and completely ruin any chance he had with you. 

He swallowed hard, forcing a casual laugh. "Oh, uh...I just guessed. Lucky hunch, I guess."

Before you could even respond, the sky darkened and fat raindrops began to fall, drenching both of you. The chill soaked through your clothes, making you shiver. He stood there, stunned by the sudden downpour. Without a second thought, you grabbed his hand, feeling the warmth of his skin against the cold rain. You tugged him urgently, splashing through puddles as you ran towards your apartment building. The sound of rain and hurried footsteps filled the air. Breathless, you pulled him inside, the warmth and dryness a welcome relief from the storm outside.

Felix felt a rush of adrenaline as you grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the building. The sudden rain had caught him off guard, but the feeling of your hand, warm and tight around his, sent a tingle down his spine.

 He quickly followed you inside, his heart pounding in his chest. He tried to keep his composure, but being this close to you, holding your hand, was doing all sorts of things to him.

"Here why don't you come up to my apartment, I don't want you to get sick from this weather. You can dry off and we can eat something!" 

His heart leaped at your suggestion. The thought of being in your apartment, of being alone with you...it was both exciting and nerve-wracking. But he couldn't say no, not when you were being so kind to him. 

He nodded, trying not to let his eagerness show too much. "Are you sure? I don't want to intrude..."

"I really don't mind. Come up and change into some dry clothes, okay? I'll order us something to eat. Are you okay with Thai food?" you asked as the two of you stepped into the elevator.

 Both of you were drenched, and a puddle began to form at your feet as you waited to reach your floor.

Felix nodded again, his thoughts racing as he watched the elevator numbers climb. He was going to be in your apartment, alone with you, it was like a dream come true. 

"Thai food sounds great," he managed to say, his voice slightly breathless. "I'll eat anything right now, I'm starving."

"I would hope so, you didn't eat anything our entire shift today" you pouted, trying to remember if he even had his daily shaken iced espresso with oat milk that he usually makes twice a shift.

He chuckled at your pout, his heart melting at how cute you looked. He also found it sweet that you kept track of if he had eaten or not. It was one of the many things about you that he loved. 

"Yeah, I guess you're right. I was so busy today that I kind of forgot to take a break."

 He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, a slight blush creeping up on his cheeks. He didn't want to admit that he had been so distracted thinking about you that he hadn't even thought about eating.

"That's not good Lix, you shouldn't over-exert yourself" you scolded him while trying to find the keys to your apartment.

"I know, I know, I just had a lot on my mind today," he admitted, feeling a little guilty for not taking better care of himself.

You finally found your keys and opened the door, allowing him to step inside. "I'm going to shower real quick, and then you can go after me so you don't catch a cold, okay?"

He nodded, trying to keep his cool as he stepped into your apartment. His heart was racing again as he thought about you being naked and wet only a few feet away. 

He cleared his throat, trying to compose himself. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Just don't take too long, or I might get lonely and start raiding your fridge." He joked, trying to hide his inner thoughts.

He chuckled at the sight of the empty fridge, making a mental note to offer to take you grocery shopping sometime. He quickly took your phone from you, looking down at the already-opened delivery app with your part of the order placed. 

He watched as you headed towards the bathroom, a lump forming in his throat as he imagined you stripping down and stepping into the shower. The image was burned into his mind, and it took all his self-control to not follow you into the bathroom. Instead, he took a deep breath and looked down at your phone, trying to distract himself. 

He glanced at the bathroom door, wondering how long you would be. He was trying not to be impatient, but his mind and body were both eagerly anticipating your return.

You stepped out of the bathroom, steam trailing behind you as you wrapped a towel around your damp hair. Droplets of water trickled down your neck and shoulders, soaking into the fabric of your oversized t-shirt and shorts, making them cling to your skin. The cool air of the room sent a shiver down your spine as you padded softly across the floor toward Felix. 

Felix's breath caught in his throat as you emerged from the bathroom, wrapped in a towel and wearing thin, clinging clothes. The sight of you, still slightly wet and rosy from the shower, was almost too much for him to handle. His eyes raked over your body, taking in every inch of damp skin, and his heart skipped several beats. 

He managed to tear his gaze away from you and tried to act casual, but he couldn't help the way his body reacted to your presence. He swallowed hard, trying to control the ache in his jeans.

"Hey, Lix," you said softly, your voice carrying a hint of warmth. "The bathroom is free, so please go ahead and shower. Just hand me your clothes so I can dry them for you, okay?"

"I also left an extra pair of clothes and a towel in the bathroom so it's easier for you"

He quickly stood up, trying to adjust his jeans again and hide his arousal. He picked up his wet clothes from the floor and walked towards the bathroom. 

"Thanks," he said, his voice a little huskier than usual. "I won't be too long." 

He entered the bathroom and closed the door, locking it behind him. He leaned against the door, taking a deep breath to try and calm his nerves and the growing tension in his body.

He slowly stripped off his damp clothes, tossing them towards the door. He couldn't help but glance at the pile of clothes, imagining you taking them off of your body. He quickly picked up your shirt, smelling your scent on it, and the thought made him shiver.

Felix's heart nearly stopped when he saw the pair of black lace panties lying on the floor. His eyes widened and he quickly looked away, his heart rate immediately increasing. 

Before he could stop himself, he picked them up and brought them closer to his face, taking in the scent of your laundry detergent essence on the fabric.

His cock hardened at the thought of you wearing them, your pussy pressing and rubbing against them as the two of you worked the entire day. 

He let out a groan before slowly wrapping the fabric around his leaking cock. What you didn’t know wouldn’t hurt you right? It’s not like he was purposely doing it, it was just right there for his convenience. 

He muffled his moans as he pumped his cock with your underwear, trying to be as quiet as possible as the water ran in the background. His only thought was you. 

You when you wore those cute little dresses. You. When you always bent over to get things from the fridge for him knowing how much his back ached. You. who helped him embrace his freckles. You, who was in this bathroom mere minutes before him, fully naked. 

With that he came with a groan, quickly hopping into the shower to ride out his high under the steaming hot water, cleaning your underwear of any evidence of infidelity while he was at it. 

He grabbed the soap and began to run it over his body, scrubbing away the layers of dirt and sweat, and the shame of him cumming on your pretty little panties, only further intoxicated him with your scent. 

He hadn’t realized how much time had passed until you knocked on the door to the bathroom. 

"Felix?"

He heard your voice calling out to him, breaking the spell. He quickly threw the lace into his pile of clothes and turned off the water, wrapping a towel around his waist.

"Yeah?" he called out, his voice a bit shaky. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, the food just here so I was wondering if you were finished washing up?"

He took a quick breath, trying to compose himself. 

"Yeah, I'm just about done. I'll be out in a minute." 

He stepped out of the bathroom, his hair still damp and water droplets running down his chest and arms. He tried to ignore the way your eyes lingered on his bare skin, pretending not to notice the slight flush that was creeping up your neck.

"I'm so sorry, I had no idea I forgot to leave clothes for you in the bathroom" you whispered, your cheeks reddened. 

You quickly handed them to him before scurrying out of your room.

Felix chuckled as you handed him the clothes, his heart warming at your flustered state. He found it endearing how shy you were about accidentally forgetting to leave him clothes to change into. He tried to ignore the way his body reacted to the sight of you blushing and flustered, his towel becoming uncomfortably tight for a brief moment.

He quickly dressed in the clothes you had given him, trying his best not to focus on the fact that they smelled like you. The baggy t-shirt was comfortable, but the way it clung to his damp skin and hair made him feel even more on edge.

He took another deep breath and opened the bathroom door, stepping back into the living room where you were setting down plates and chopsticks. 

"So, what's for dinner?" he asked, feigning nonchalance and hoping you wouldn't notice the small bulge in his sweatpants.

You held up the two takeout containers, "well I ordered drunken noodles, and I kind of forgot what you did. We can always share!"

Felix chuckled again, feeling relieved that you hadn't noticed his current...situation. He tried to keep his mind off the way your shirt dipped low enough to show off your collarbones, and the way your shorts rode up slightly on your thighs. He shook his head slightly, trying to clear his thoughts and focus on the food. 

"Sounds good to me," he said, rubbing his stomach. "I'm starving."

He walked over to the couch, sat down, and tried to keep his pose casual. He glanced over at you, noticing how your hair was still damp and your cheeks were still slightly pink. The sight made his heart rate speed up again, and he tried to distract himself by looking down at the food.

He grabbed a pair of chopsticks and started digging into the noodles, trying to act like everything was normal. But as he watched you eat, he couldn't help but let his mind wander to dirty thoughts. He could see your lips wrapped around the utensils, the way your tongue would flick out to catch any stray noodle…

“You okay Lixie?” you asked, looking up at him as you ate more of your food. Your cheeks are slightly full causing him to choke on his own dish. 

He swallowed hard, trying to keep his composure. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," he said, his voice a little strained. "Just...hungry, you know?"

A while passed like this, the silence of the room only occasionally broken up by small talk. The both of you were too infatuated in your food to even register what else was happening. 

"Do you want me to wash up your plate?" you asked, getting up from the cushion you were on.

Felix's eyes followed you as you got up, watching the way your shirt rode up even more, revealing more of your smooth, soft skin.

 He had to bite his lip to keep from groaning, his body responding even more to the sight of you moving around, so close and yet so out of reach. 

He quickly cleared his throat and looked away, trying to compose himself. "Uh, yeah, sure," he managed to say, his voice a little hoarse.

"So you aren't going to have your nightly cup of green tea" he asked as you began cleaning up your table and walking over to your kitchen. 

You looked at him startled, your eyes going wide. "How did you know about that?"

Felix chuckled, feeling a wave of affection for you wash over him. He knew you too well to not know about your obsession with green tea. 

"Let's just say I pay closer attention to your habits than you think," he said with a sly smile. "You have a cup of tea every night before bed, like clockwork. It's almost endearing how predictable you are."

"Felix, I've never had green tea at work, the only time I do is when I get home, how did you know what I drink before I go to bed" you asked, worry ridden on your face as you began to look around your kitchen for anything to protect you.

Felix's smile faded as he noticed the look of worry on your face, and he realized his poor choice of words.

"Hey, hey, calm down," he said, holding his hands up in a placating gesture. "It was just a guess, I swear. I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's not just a guess" you screamed. That's when it clicked, he was the one who had been watching you every night. 

The only time you were followed was after your shift with him. He knew exactly what apartment you lived in. It wasn't just a "lucky guess" as he said. He knew everything.

Felix's heart dropped as he realized the extent of his slip-up. You had figured out that he had been watching you, and now you were scared and confused. 

"Listen, please...let me explain," he pleaded, standing up from the couch. "I can explain everything, just please give me a chance to speak."

"No, I don't want an explanation, I need you to get the fuck out" you screamed, curling into a corner in your kitchen, your body shook as you began to speak up again.

"Why are you doing this to me, I thought we were friends" you whined, tears streaming down your face.

Felix's heart broke as he saw the fear and sadness in your eyes. He took a step closer to you but stopped when you shrunk further into the corner, clearly terrified of him.

"I know, I know, but please, just listen to me," he begged, his voice cracking. "I never wanted to hurt you, I swear. I just...I care about you. I care too much. And I thought...I thought I could prevent something bad from happening if I just kept an eye on you."

"How were you helping? You were the one who was causing everything" you continued to sob.

He wanted to deny your accusations, but he knew he couldn't. He had been the one stalking you, following you home every night and watching you from afar. 

He had justified it to himself, telling himself it was for your own good, but now that you knew the truth, he could see how creepy and wrong it was.

 He took a deep breath and looked you in the eye, his voice quiet and shaky. "You're right. I was the one causing everything."

He took a tentative step closer to you but stopped again when he saw the look of fear flash in your eyes. 

"But I...I never meant to scare you," he said, his own eyes tearing up. 

"I just...I just couldn't stand the thought of something happening to you, and I thought if I just kept a constant eye on you, I could prevent it."

"Protect me how!" you screamed, "why would you do this to me?" you continued to sob. 

"I just wanted to make you feel good sweetheart" he whispered, bending down to capture your face in his hand, brushing away your tears.

He brought down his lips towards your before kissing you, the taste of your tears infiltrating his mouth as you attempted to push him away.

He could feel you trying to push him away, but he just held on tighter, refusing to let you go. He knew he didn't deserve to kiss you, not after everything he had done, but he couldn't stop himself. He needed to feel your lips on his, even if just for a moment.

"Please sweetheart, want to make you feel good. Won't you be a good baby and take it?" he grinned, watching the way your lips puffed out from him ever so slightly nibbling on it.  Your tears streaking your flushed red cheeks. You looked at him meekly before nodding, taking your hand in his, not understanding how he had such an effect on you.

Felix chuckled as you nodded, his heart swelling with a twisted mix of emotions, and he pulled you closer to him, wrapping his arms around your waist as he claimed your mouth in a deep kiss. His tongue slipped past your lips, tasting the salty tears that still lingered on them.

“Such a good girl for me” he muttered into your lips. 

Felix chuckled as you nodded, his heart swelling with a twisted mix of emotions, and he pulled you closer to him, wrapping his arms around your waist as he claimed your mouth in a deep kiss. His tongue slipped past your lips, tasting the salty tears that still lingered on them.

He pushed you backward until your back hit the wall, pinning you against it with his body. He broke the kiss for a moment to look into your eyes, his own eyes darkened with a possessive lust. 

"You're mine, you know that right?" he asked, his voice low and hoarse. "You belong to me and only me."

You whined as he continued to caress your face. 

Felix chuckled again as you whined and leaned into his touch, the sound of your needy whines only fueling his desire for you. He leaned in and whispered in your ear, his breath hot against your skin,

"That's right, sweetheart. You're mine, and I'm never letting go. You're going to do everything I say, and you're going to love every second of it."

He nipped at your earlobe, his hands roaming your body, feeling the soft skin of your back through your shirt.

"And if you're a good girl for me, I'll give you everything you've ever dreamed of," he murmured, his lips trailing down your neck, leaving a trail of kisses and bite marks in his wake.

"Lixie" you whined as he continued to nibble at your skin.

Felix chuckled at your whine, his heart fluttering at the sound of his nickname on your lips. He continued to kiss and bite at your skin, marking you as his, his hands gripping your hips possessively. 

“All needy and desperate," he whispered, his voice low and hoarse. "It makes me want to do all sorts of things to you."

You grasped his hand and led him to your room, your senses overwhelmed by his embrace, feeling his warmth as he held you close.

Felix followed you obediently, his grip on your hand tight as he allowed you to lead him into your room. His heart was racing with desire and excitement, his mind consumed with thoughts of all the things he wanted to do to you. 

"So obedient," he murmured, his voice filled with praise as he pressed up behind you once you reached the edge of your bed.

He wrapped his arms around you from behind, his chest pressed against your back as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. He inhaled deeply, breathing in your scent as his hands roamed your body. 

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to have you like this," he whispered in your ear, his voice thick with desire.

"Really?" you asked, feeling his embrace tighten as he pressed closer. 

Felix hummed in response, his lips trailing kisses along your neck as he held you close. "Yeah, sweetheart," he murmured between kisses, his hands slipping under your shirt to feel your soft skin. 

"For as long as I can remember, I've craved having you like this, all to myself. It's driving me insane with how badly I want you."

"Is that why you kept watching me?" you asked, turning around to face him, your hand clutching his face, tracing every freckle as he began to speak.

"Yeah," he admitted, his voice low and hoarse. "That's why. I couldn't resist the urge to watch you, to know every move you made, to make sure you were safe."

"I couldn't stop myself from wanting to keep you close. I needed to feel like I had some control over your life, and watching you was the only way I could do that."

"That's not normal though Lixie"

"I know," he admitted, his voice quiet. "I know it's not normal, and I'm sorry. But...but I just...I just couldn't stop myself. I care about you too much."

"Then show me, please," you whispered, kissing his cheek and trailing down to his soft, plump lips.

Felix's heart skipped a beat as you kissed his cheek and then his lips, your whine sending a shiver down his spine. He responded eagerly to your kiss, closing his eyes and savoring the feel of your lips on his. But then he pulled away, a determined look in his eyes. 

"Sweetheart, I can show you, but first you have to promise me something," he said, his voice low and commanding.

"Anything" you whimpered, feeling yourself growing wetter at every passing moment that he wasn't next to you, his touch not being pressed against you

"Promise me that you're mine. Promise me that you belong to me and no one else," he whined as he cupped your cheek, pulling you closer to his face. 

"I promise" you whispered back before kissing him feverishly.

"Good girl," he murmured, his voice thick with desire. "You’re all mine now, sweetheart."

Before you could even respond, he pushed you onto the bed, his body following soon after as he settled on top of you. His hands moved under your shirt, his fingers tracing the bare skin of your stomach.

He began to leave a trail of kisses down your neck, stopping to bite and suck at the spot where your shoulder met your neck. He wanted to mark you, to claim you as his own. 

"You have no idea how long I've been waiting for this," he murmured against your skin, his hands continuing to roam your body.

"How long Lixie?" you whimpered as he began to pull off your shirt. He took in the sight of your bare skin, biting his lip as he straddled you, his thighs shutting yours closed as he began to kiss up and down your neck. 

"So long" he murmured between kisses. "For years, I've been waiting for this. Wanting you, aching for you."

"Want you too" you whined as you pulled off his shirt, your hands roaming up and down his chiseled chest, watching the way his body clenched slightly as you ran your finger along his abs.

He leaned down and captured your lips in a deep kiss, his tongue dipping into your mouth as he pulled you closer to him, his hands roaming your body once again.

"You have no idea what you do to me," he panted, breaking the kiss for a moment before attacking you once again, your lips pressing against one another feverishly.

You gazed at him, noting his ragged breath. "Then show me," you whimpered as his hands began to caress your thighs.

"I'll show you just how much I desire you, just how much I need you."

He began to kiss and bite at your thighs, his lips and teeth leaving a trail of marks on your skin. He wanted to make sure that you would remember this moment, that you would remember who you belonged to.

He murmured against your skin, his lips trailing kisses up your inner thigh. "Every part of you is mine."

“Yours” you whimpered as he continued to abuse you everywhere but the one place you needed him. 

He loved how needy you were for him, your body begging for his touch. He moved his lips closer to where you needed him, his breath hot against your skin.

Felix's eyebrows raised in surprise and excitement as he pulled off your shorts, his breath catching in his throat as he saw that you weren't wearing any panties. You were so wet it began to drip down to your thighs. 

"You're full of surprises, aren't you baby?" he said, his voice thick with desire. "And here I thought you were a good girl."

He slowly licked a stripe up your cunt, savoring the taste that he couldn’t quite get off your panties. 

“And you taste so good too, could eat you for hours” he moaned before diving back in, his fingers opening up your pretty little cunt for him, allowing him to nip at your clit. 

“Fuck Lix!” you whined above him, your hand finding his hair, intertwining your fingers between it, pushing him deeper into your pretty little pussy.  

He slowly removed his mouth from your cunt, your essence covering the bottom half of his face. “You are going to take what I give you or else you aren’t gonna get anything” he grinned before shoving himself back into you, letting his tongue flick out, swiping across your sensitive flesh, eliciting a gasp from your lips. 

He continued to lick and taste you, his hands gripping your thighs to keep you still as you writhed and whimpered beneath him. He loved the way you tasted. 

“So sweet baby, sweetest thing I’ve ever tasted” he muttered into your poor cunt as he began to push his finger inside of you, stretching out your whole. 

“Lixie, it feels so good” you whined as he continued to lap at you, savoring each and every moan and whine that escaped your pretty little lips. 

He continued to tease you, his tongue and lips bringing you closer and closer to the edge, but never quite pushing you over. He could feel how close you were, how your body trembled beneath him. 

"You want to come, don't you, my sweet girl?" he whispered, his breath hot against your sensitive skin. "But I'm not going to let you. Not yet."

"Why!" you whined underneath him, bucking your hips up to get any sort of stimulation.

He placed his hands on your hips, holding you down with a firm grip, preventing you from bucking against him

"Because I want you to wait for me to fuck you, baby," he murmured, his mouth moving to the other thigh, leaving a trail of love bites in its wake. "I want you to be desperate for me, aching for me. I want to ruin you completely."

His tongue continued to tease you, his lips leaving a trail of kisses up your inner thigh, his teeth nipping at your skin as he went.

 "I want you to be so desperate for release that you'll do anything I ask," he whispered, his breath hot against your skin. “And only when you truly beg for me will I finally give you my cock” he chuckled against your cunt. 

"Please Lixie, need you in me, can't do this anymore" you whined, your chest heaving and tears began to stream out of your eyes. He had been edging you for so long, pulling away as soon as he felt you were close to your high. His fingers that were previously thrusting in you stopped completely, his soaked face only rising to laugh at your pathetic face.

"Oh sweetheart, you're so cute when you beg," he said, his voice low and hoarse. "But I don't think you've earned it yet."

"Please, I've been such a good girl for you Lixie, please let me cum, or at least fuck me" you whimpered "I'll do anything, anything you ask me, just please let me cum" you whined, tears falling out faster as your entire body shook from the multiple orgasms that were ripped away from you ever so easily under his grasp.

Felix's eyes darkened at your words, his body responding to your desperate pleas. He loved seeing you like this, so needy and pathetic, begging for him to give you what you so desperately needed. He knew he had complete control over you, and he loved every second of it. 

"Anything, sweetheart?" he asked, his voice low and rough. "You'll do anything I ask, no matter what?"

"Yes Lix, anything, just fuck me already!" you screamed.

He leaned down, his body pressing against yours as he spoke into your ear, his breath hot against your skin.

“Since you’ve been such a good girl, maybe I should give it to you” 

You simply nodded your head up and down as fast as you physically possible, showing you truly how eager you were for him. 

He laughed at how desperate you were for him, pulling down his boxers, allowing his extremely hard cock to slap his stomach, the tip red and angry already leaking pre-cum. 

It took all his might to not cum in his boxers at the taste of you. 

“Please Lixie, need your cock inside of me” you whined, spreading your legs open for him, allowing him to see how your hole pulsed at just the sight of him standing there, his hard cock slapped against his stomach. 

Felix's eyes darkened even more at your words, his breathing ragged with desire. He was losing control, his own need for you becoming almost too much to resist fucking you. 

He slowly bent down, positioning himself between your legs, his hands pinning your hips to the bed to keep you still. He looked down at you, his eyes dark and possessive.

With that, he pushed inside you, a guttural moan escaping his lips at the feeling of your hot tight cunt wrapping around his length.

You moaned underneath him, his body pressing against yours as you got used to his sheer size inside of you. 

He buried himself deep within you, filling you completely, his hands continuing to roam around your body. He needed to touch you, to make sure that his fantasy were real. 

He had spent nights jerking off to the thought of you begging for his cock, whimpering for him, and it took all his strength to cum right there and then at the sight of your eyes pressed together, your mouth hung open as he began to thrust inside of you. 

He began to move, his thrusts rough and desperate, his breathing ragged and shallow. He needed you, needed to possess you and claim you completely.

“Feels so good Lix”

You kept babbling at the feeling of him inside of you. The only thought on your mind was him. 

“Lix, Lix, Lix” you kept muttering, drool slowly escaping past your lips. 

"You're mine, sweetheart," he repeated, his voice low and rough in your ear. "No one else is ever going to make you feel this way again. Only me. You're mine."

“Only yours” you whimpered out. 

"That's right, sweetheart," he growled, his hips picking up speed. "You're mine and mine alone. No one else will ever touch you, have you, own you. Only me."

He slowly pulled his hand down to where you needed him most, playing with your clit as he continued his brutal pace inside of you. 

"That's right, sweetheart," he growled, his hips picking up speed. "You're mine and mine alone. No one else will ever touch you, have you, own you. Only me."

He buried his face in your neck, his teeth and tongue leaving marks and bites as he continued his relentless pace, his breathing ragged and uneven.

"I won't let anyone else have you," he whispered in your ear, his lips nipping at your skin. " I'll make sure of that. You're mine, forever. No one else will ever know you the way I do. No one else will ever be able to make you feel the way I can."

His hands roamed your body as he continued to claim you, his lips and teeth marking your skin, his hips never ceasing in their relentless pace.

Every time you called out his name, every whimper and moan that escaped your lips, only served to drive him deeper into his primal need for you.

He pulled back slightly, his eyes locking with yours. He wanted to see your face, to see the way you looked at him in this moment, completely lost in the pleasure and ecstasy he was giving you.

“Aren’t you a good girl for me?” he asked, slightly slapping your cheek to get a response

“Yes!” you screamed as he began to push your legs back, his cock pressing deeper inside of you, hitting your g-spot every time he rutted his hips inside of you. 

“Gonna cum” you moaned as he continued his brutal pace. 

“Yeah, baby? Gonna cum for me? Gonna cum all over my cock like a good girl?” he growled into your ear, chasing his own high. 

His hips continued to slam into you, his breathing ragged and wild. He couldn't get enough of you, couldn't get close enough. He needed you, needed to claim every part of you as his own.

Felix growled low in his throat as you screamed that you were close to cumming. The sound of your ecstasy only fueled his own need and desire for you. He wanted to bring you to the edge, to make you lose all control beneath him.

"Not yet," he growled in your ear. "You're not coming without me."

His lips moved back to your neck, kissing and biting their way down to your collarbone. His hips began to move faster, his breathing becoming more ragged as he continued to drive you towards the edge of ecstasy.

"You're so close, aren't you?" he whispered in your ear, his voice thick with desire. "I can feel it. I can feel how close you are for me. Your walls are clenching around me like a fucking vice, but you're not going to come yet, not until I say so." his pace is relentless and unceasing.

You continued to moan his name, like a fucking chant and he couldn't resist your desperate plea any longer. He could see how close you were to your release, how your body was tense and trembling beneath him. He loved seeing you so desperate for him.

"Come for me. Let go, sweetheart. Let me hear you cry out my name."

“Felix!” you screamed one last time before letting go.

He continued to move his hips through your climax, his body trembling and shaking with the effort. His pace became more irregular and erratic as he approached his own release. He could feel himself nearing the edge, could feel the pressure building within him.

"Sweetheart," he gasped, his voice thick with need and desire. "I'm...I'm going to come. I can't hold on much longer."

“Come inside, please come inside of me” you whined, your body becoming more and more overstimulated as he continued to rut into you. It was easy to reach your second orgasm, your walls clenching around his cock as Felix could feel his control slipping. His body was wracked with tremors and shivers as he neared his release. Your words only drove him closer to the edge, his body responding to your plea without hesitation.

"Yes," he gasped, his voice barely more than a guttural moan. 

His hips slammed into you with one final, rough thrust, his release crashing over him like a wave. He groaned your name, his arms wrapping around you tightly to keep you close as he lost himself in the ecstasy of his climax. He buried his face in your neck, his breath hot and ragged against your skin.

“So baby, how about some green tea?” he giggled, pulling your body into him. 

“Just wanna stay like this” you whined as he kissed the top of your head, covering the two of you with the blanket.

"You're mine," he whispered again, his voice thick with emotion. "All mine. No one else gets to have you, no one else gets to touch you, no one else gets to know you the way I do. You're mine, and I'm never letting you go."

[ginnsbaker]

fic: if i bleed (you'll be the last to know) (14/?)

Part Summary: Leigh reconciles with Jules and then receives news from Danny that could potentially disrupt her new beginning with you.

Pairing: Leigh Shaw x Fem!Reader | Word count for this part: 5.200+ | Warnings: Spicy phone call | Author's note: The date will happen in the next one, and then after that, 1-2 chapters to wrap up this series :)

Masterlist | Part I Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VIII | Part IX | Part X | Part XI | Part XII | Part XIII

-

The date doesn't happen as quickly as Leigh expected. You don’t bring it up again for several days after your grand, against-all-odds declaration of love.

In the meantime, you text constantly. Sometimes you call, just to ask about her day. The first time, she’s so confused, waiting for the real reason behind your call. But there isn’t one—you simply wanted to talk, and texting wouldn’t do it.

She’s rarely on the phone with anyone these days. For her, phone calls are usually reserved for urgent requests from Drew or her mom, or from companies trying to sell her something. The last time she was on the phone just to talk was with Matt, during the stretches when work kept them apart for days. Before that, it was high school, chatting with friends and boyfriends about everything and nothing.

Talking to you on the phone feels like stepping back in time. There’s something intimate about it, something that modern-day texting can’t capture. She finds herself looking forward to your calls, the sound of your voice at the end of a long, tiring, or listless day.

Days stretch into a week before you finally ask her out, armed with the when and where. Leigh will never admit it to anyone, but the wait is excruciating.

The butterflies swarm in her stomach as she lies on her bed, fresh from a shower, in an oversized shirt and boy shorts, biting at her fingernails. She's already restless by the time her phone rings at the usual hour.

She picks up almost immediately, trying to keep her voice as blasé as she can manage. “Hey.”

“Hey, Leigh,” you reply breathily, not realizing how that tone makes Leigh press the phone harder against her ear, as if she wants to hear more of it. “How was your day?”

She rolls onto her back, stretching her hand out and drawing patterns in the air against the ceiling. 

“It was okay. Nothing too exciting. How about yours?” she says.

“Pretty good. Just busy with work stuff. I was thinking about you, though.”

The simple statement sends a new wave of warmth through her. “Is that so?”

“Very much so,” you whisper, and Leigh can almost see your smile, just like the one forming on her lips. “So, uh, I was thinking…”

“Yeah?” Leigh prompts, her heart picking up speed. She hears some shuffling on your end and waits with bated breath.

“Maybe we should finally go on that date,” you suggest,  hopeful and a bit nervous. 

Leigh’s heart leaps, and she tears the phone away from her ear, burying her face into her pillow as a squeal escapes before she can contain it. Catching herself, she quickly schools her expression, tosses the pillow aside, and sits up ramrod straight.

“We should,” Leigh blurts out, still feeling her heart thumping wildly against her ribs. “When were you thinking?”

“How about this Saturday?”

Leigh pauses, mentally counting—one, two, three—before replying, “Great. I’m free then.” 

Wanting to lock in the details, she asks, “What time?”

“Could I, um, have you for the whole day?” you ask hesitantly, and then quickly realizing how it sounded, you clarify, “I mean, could we make it a day-long date? I promise it’ll be worth your while.”

Leigh hums, pretending to mull it over, but inside, she's practically screaming yes.

“What do you have planned?”

“It's a surprise,” you reply, the playful secrecy in your tone drawing a grin from Leigh. 

Unable to contain her intrigue, Leigh tries to coax out some clues. “Anything you need from me? Dress code? Anything I can help you with?”

“No, just be yourself,” you say, your voice dropping to a softer, more intimate cadence. “Wear whatever makes you feel most like you. You're beautiful in anything.”

Leigh feels a warm blush spread across her cheeks. She's grateful you can't see her, can't see how your words reduce her to a pile of mush.

“In anything?” she asks coyly.

“Or nothing,” you whisper back, almost without thinking.

Leigh nearly chokes on her breath at that, biting her lip to stifle a moan that threatens to escape owing to the boldness of your flirtation. She doesn't immediately realize she's drifted into a stunned silence until you apologize, worrying that you might have crossed a line. 

“I'm sorry if that was too forward,” you say.

Leigh shakes herself, trying to clear the haze of memories—the soft moans, the way your body yielded to her touch that night. “No, it’s... I still think about that night,” she shares.

“O-Oh?” you stammer, your grip tightening around the phone. You're driving home with one hand, thinking it would be a short call. Suddenly feeling lightheaded, you quickly pull over to the side of an empty street, realizing you might not make it home safely if you don't.

“What do you... think about, specifically?” you venture, slowly unbuckling your seatbelt.

It’s as if a switch has been flipped in her. Her mind races back to that night—the way you touched yourself under her gaze, how she guided your movements, the feel of her finger inside you while she rode your thigh. 

“Leigh?”

Leigh's breath hitches, and she feels heat spreading through her body. She kicks off the covers, finding herself lying flat on the bed, her fingers inching teasingly at the hem of her shorts. She closes her eyes, letting the memory of that night trickle into the forefront of her mind.

“I think about the way you looked under me,” she says softly, “The flush of your skin, the sounds you made, how your lips felt against mine.”

Her words send a shiver down your spine. “Leigh,” you murmur, “I-I think about that night too. How you took control, how you made me feel like I was the only thing that mattered.”

Leigh's fingers slip beneath the waistband of her shorts, teasing herself as she remembers the feel of your skin against hers. “I remember guiding your hands,” she continues, her voice growing huskier. “Watching you touch yourself, seeing the pleasure in your eyes. It was intoxicating.”

You can hear the desire in her voice, and it sends a surge of arousal through you. “I remember the way you moved against me,” you reply, your voice low. “Your skin was so hot against mine, it felt like I was on fire.”

As Leigh's fingers dip lower, brushing against the wetness between her legs, she gasps. She tries to contain it but fails, letting out a guttural moan—a sound of pure want—right into your ear. The rawness of that sound snaps you out of your lust-filled reverie.

“Fuck, are you... are you touching yourself? I-I'm so—” you start, your voice shaking.

“Don't apologize. Just keep talking. It's okay,” Leigh cuts you off sharply, switches the phone to speaker mode, and swiftly removes her panties. For a brief second, she thinks she probably shouldn't be doing this, not before the date they'd just planned. But the overwhelming urge washes over her, making rational thoughts blur into the background. She can't control herself; she needs to come, needs you to make her come.

“Tell me what you'd do,” she chunters, no longer concerned about sounding needy. “Please.” 

“Shit,” you hiss, quickly connecting your phone to your car’s speakers and then tossing it onto the passenger seat. You then adjust the driver's seat to give yourself more legroom and hurriedly begin to unbutton your jeans. Though you're embarrassed to admit that you've never had phone sex before, you're not about to let inexperience stop you. Not when Leigh was practically purring in your ear, begging for it.

“Y/N?” Leigh’s voice rumbles through the confined space of your car and you hurriedly close your eyes as you formulate a response, your head buzzing with several things you want to do to Leigh at once.

“I'd start by kissing you,” you begin, your voice low and deliberate, though you feel a bit foolish at the tentative start. “Soft, teasing kisses, tracing a path down your body. I'd take my time, Leigh, tasting every inch of your skin.”

“Where would you kiss me first?” Leigh breathes.

“Your neck,” you reply, your fingers brushing against your own skin as if you’re tracing the path your lips would take on hers. “I’d kiss right behind your ears…then down your throat, lingering at your collarbone.”

Leigh’s breathing becomes more ragged, and you can almost feel her anticipation. “And then?”

“Then I’d kiss my way down to your breasts,” you say, your own arousal building. “I’d take each nipple in my mouth, sucking gently, then harder, feeling them harden against my tongue. I’d circle my tongue around them, flicking the tip, just like so.”

Leigh listens, her breaths becoming shallow, her body trembling with need. She closes her eyes, lost in the sensation, in the vividness of your description. She traps a rosy bud between her two fingers, mimicking the rhythm you describe, the tension in her belly coiling more tightly.

Meanwhile, your own hands are busy on your body. Despite the cramped space even with the car seat reclined, you manage to slide two fingers inside your pants, rubbing your clit, while your other hand tweaks your nipple.

A soft moan escapes Leigh’s lips, and you know she’s imagining your mouth on her. “I’d keep moving lower, kissing down your stomach, tracing the lines of your body with my tongue. When I finally reach your thighs, I’d spread them open and kiss the inside, so close to where you want me but not quite there yet.”

“I’d breathe you in,” you murmur, “taking a moment to just enjoy the scent of you. Then I’d lick, just once, a slow, teasing lick from the bottom of your slit to the top, tasting how wet you are for me.”

“Fuck,” Leigh groans wantonly, her fingers undoubtedly mirroring your words on her own skin. You can almost see her hand moving against her clitoris, fingers collecting her own wetness and spreading it all over until her inner thighs are glistening with it.

“I’d part you with my fingers,” you continue, your own breath coming faster now, “and then I’d dive in. I’d lap at you, my tongue moving in slow circles around your clit, feeling it swell under my tongue. I’d drink you in, Leigh, tasting every drop, getting lost in how sweet you are.”

“Don’t stop,” Leigh pants, and you can hear her movements quickening, the unmistakable sound of wetness and skin in frantic motion, as if she's placed her phone near the epicenter of her impending climax.

“I wouldn’t,” you promise. “I’d suck on your clit, gently at first, then harder, using my tongue to drive you crazy. I’d slide a finger inside you, curling it to find that perfect spot, the one that makes you see stars. I’d keep licking and sucking, adding another finger, thrusting them in and out, matching the rhythm of my tongue. I wouldn’t stop until I felt you trembling, until I heard you crying out my name as you came.”

Leigh’s moans grow louder, more desperate, and you can almost see her, writhing on her bed, lost in pleasure. “Y/N, I’m close,” she gasps.

“I’d be looking up at you, watching your face as you c-come for m-me,” you say, your voice faltering as you slide a finger inside yourself. “Fuck, Leigh, baby, come for me.”

It's the endearment and the mental image of your deep brown eyes, brimming with hunger and worship, that sends her spiraling into ecstasy.

“Oh god, Y/N!” Leigh moans, her back curving as an intense orgasm overtakes her.

You’re not there yet, but you close your eyes, letting the image of her climax burn into your mind.

Leigh lies there, basking in the afterglow, her body still trembling with the remnants of her orgasm. She’s about to check in on you, perhaps return the favor, when the front door opens and closes with a bang.

“Mom? Leigh?” Jules yells from the living room.

Panic surges through Leigh. She scrambles to her feet, hurriedly pulling on her underwear and shorts. The phone slips from her grasp, landing on the bed, the line still open.

Leigh reaches the top of the stairs, breathless and flushed, just as Jules appears at the bottom, looking up with a mix of worry and curiosity. 

“What's going on?” Leigh asks, wincing as she feels the stickiness between her thighs. She silently curses, wishing Jules could have shown up after she had a chance to shower.

“Where’s Mom?” Jules demands, her eyes scanning the hallway. “And Logan?”

“She took him with her for a grocery run,” Leigh replies, coming down the stairs. “Is something wrong?”

Jules sighs. “I was just worried. The door was unlocked, and I couldn’t find anyone. Thought something might’ve happened.”

Leigh relaxes a bit, though the adrenaline from moments before still courses through her veins. “It’s fine. I just didn’t realize you’d be coming home tonight,” she says.

“Yeah, about that…” Jules trails off, tilting her head toward the kitchen with a meaningful glance. 

Leigh follows, her bare feet whispering against the wooden floorboards. Striving for nonchalance, she asks, “You hungry?” Her hand hovers over the fridge handle, betraying none of her recent distractions.

Jules stops in her tracks and turns back to Leigh. “I’ve been thinking,” she starts, hesitating slightly. “I’d like to move back in.”

“That’s… great,” Leigh says flatly, unsuspecting of her sister’s announcement. She catches the sharp drop of Jules’ brows and hurries to cushion her words. “I mean, we never actually wanted you to go. You’re welcome back anytime, you know that.”

Jules' eyes sharpen, her lips pulling into a tight line. “But only if we talk first.”

Leigh nods, a hard lump forming in her throat. “Of course,” she says.

-

They end up ordering take-out when Leigh's nose wrinkles at the unmistakable stench wafting from the numerous boxes of leftovers crammed in the fridge. She can't recall how long they've been there, only that their rightful place is now the trash bin.

It's Jules who picks the restaurant, and Leigh bites her tongue over the choice of Vietnamese. The last time they'd ordered from there, Jules had barely picked at her food, pushing noodles around her plate more than eating them. Leigh tries not to think too much about it.

The dining table is overtaken by a clutter of takeout boxes, each one wafting a blend of lemongrass and ginger into the room—a scent so rich you could almost scoop it out of the air. Leigh watches her sister with that look—the one that's all walls and wariness, like she’s guarding the last piece of herself she can’t afford to lose.  Jules, on her part, looks a little restless, her fingers skirting the edges of a white takeout box like it might offer some kind of sanctuary.

“So, talk,” Leigh prompts,  twirling her chopsticks to pick up a fresh vegetable roll and dipping it into peanut sauce.

Jules takes a breath, a deep one. When she meets Leigh’s eyes, it’s with a resolve that seems to pull her upright. “Fine, since I’m the one who kicked this off, I’ll lead. I’m sorry. I know I tossed around some pretty nasty words last time I stormed out, and I meant them—then. But calling you a sociopath? That was me going off the deep end.”

Leigh’s face hardens, a quick, involuntary tightening of her features as she recalls the sting of that last confrontation. She pushes her noodles around her box, the chopsticks clattering softly. Jules waits, the steam from her own untouched meal rising and disappearing into the air.

“I appreciate your apology, Jules, really, I do. But you can't just throw words like that around, whether you mean them or not. Words stick. They fester,” Leigh says, meeting Jules’ gaze squarely. 

Jules looks down, tries to mask the hurt that flickers across her face, biting down on her lip. 

Leigh continues, “When I criticize you, it’s not meant as an attack. I’m not someone who likes to beat around the bush, especially not with family.”

The word ‘family’ hits differently this time—at least for Jules it does. Her heart aches at the mention, dragging up memories of a recent painful conversation where she had confessed to feeling like an outsider in her own family.

“Sometimes it's not about what you say but how you say it,” Jules mutters.

Leigh looks at her expectantly, clueless and curious at the same time.

“Not everyone can handle being talked to so bluntly. Not everyone’s as frank as you, okay? Sometimes it feels more like you're pushing me away instead of trying to help.”

Leigh goes quiet, letting the silence stretch just a bit before she nods. “You’re right,” she concedes, the words slipping out almost thoughtfully. It’s almost surprising, the lack of her usual quick-fire defense. “I think I got so wrapped up in the idea that being honest meant being harsh. I can work on that. I should work on that.”

Jules blinks, taken aback by the calm acceptance in Leigh’s tone, the ease with which she receives the criticism. It’s a side of Leigh she hasn’t seen much of—this reflective, almost gentle version. It's a welcome change, a sign of growth that feels both sudden and deeply necessary. 

“I didn’t expect... I mean, I’m glad you took that the way you did,” Jules says.

Leigh gives a small, almost sheepish smile, a rarity on her usually stoic face. “I’ve been thinking a lot lately. About how I say things, not just what I say. It’s been... a lot to unpack. But hearing this from you, it really helps. It does.”

She means it. Ever since you’ve stubbornly eased your way into her life, she’s done a lot of thinking. She’s done a lot of grieving too, realizing that if she had seen the changes that needed to be made earlier, things might have been different for her—for Matt. She’s learned to accept that life is always going to be filled with regrets, but she’s grateful now to recognize that she still has the chance to change, even if it came a little too late.

Better late than never, right?

She looks at Jules, her eyes earnest and a little bit haunted. “I’m sorry, Jules, for everything I said, everything I made you feel. I love you. You’re my sister, always. I know I can be too hard on the people who mean the most to me, but I’m going to try, really try, to balance that love, to understand how you need to be loved.”

Jules sits frozen, speechless for the first time. Their confrontations usually spiral into heated exchanges until one of them storms off. She hadn't expected this to be so... civil and mature. 

So unlike them. 

Finally, she manages a small, shaky smile. “Yeah, this... this went way better than I played it out in my head.”

Leigh’s laughter is a quick splash of reprieve, a burst of surprise at how well things have turned.  But it fades as quickly as it bloomed, her smile slipping into a frown as she catches the shadow creeping over Jules’s face. 

“What is it?”

Jules fidgets, nervously twisting a napkin between her fingers. “I... need to ask you something that’s been eating at me for months... well, almost a year now. And I need you to be brutally honest with me, Leigh. Can you promise that?”

Leigh feels a slight tremor of worry, but brushes it off and nods. “You’re scaring me, but sure. I promise.”

“Here we go,” Jules says, taking a deep, faltering breath. “Remember that night? When I was so drunk you had to come and get me? It was the last night Matt was... before he... you know. Do you ever resent me for it? I did such a horrible thing, robbing you of his last moments because I couldn't keep it together—”

“You know I’ve never blamed you for that. Not during our last fight, not when Matt died, just... never, basically,” Leigh says, leaning back on her chair.

“But some part of you must have hated me, because—”

“No—”

“—maybe he needed someone.”

Leigh just shrugs and denies it which only frustrates Jules even more. “No, Leigh,” she tries, “I need you to listen to me. I was very drunk that night—”

“You were really drunk a lot of nights and you’ve done a lot of crappy things,” Leigh states frankly. “But none of them had anything to do with Matt’s death.”

Jules swallows hard, her eyes stinging. “But what if it did, though?”

Leigh, clearly frustrated, responds, “You really think that?”

Jules looks down at the table and stays silent.

“Jules,” Leigh sighs, searching for the right words to reassure her sister. Eventually, she opts for honesty. “Look, I can’t tell you how to feel, but that’s not how I feel. Okay?”

It takes a second longer for Jules to say, “Okay.”

Leigh stares intently at her sister, noting the way Jules's eyes avoid contact. She knows the soft okay from Jules isn't a signal of acceptance or peace, but a white flag in a battle mostly with herself. Jules is grappling with her own guilt, a feeling that has little to do with Leigh but still consumes her. Leigh wishes, not for the first time, that her sister could see the truth as easily as she reads into misconceptions. It’s the same thing she wishes for herself.

Feeling slightly vindicated to have aired her feelings, Jules turns her attention back to the food spread between them. She reaches for her bánh mì, grips it firmly, and takes a hearty bite. As she chews thoughtfully, she manages a muffled, “Thanks, Leigh.”

Leigh just offers a small, understanding smile.

As they continue eating, Jules suddenly grins, crumbs dotting the corners of her mouth. “You're probably wondering why we're having Vietnamese tonight,” she says.

Leigh raises an eyebrow, curious despite herself. “I was wondering.”

Jules chews quickly, then, with her mouth still full, blurts out, “Well, I've got one more piece of news for you.”

-

It’s almost midnight when Leigh returns to her bedroom. 

As soon as her eyes land on her cellphone, carelessly tossed on the sheets, guilt floods her. She remembers she didn’t even say goodbye to you. Horrified, she realizes she left you hanging, high and dry.

She grabs her phone, her heart pounding in her chest, and checks for any messages from you. The screen lights up, but there are no new notifications, no missed calls.

“God, I’m such an idiot,” she mutters to herself, running a hand through her hair. She takes a deep breath and dials your number, her fingers trembling slightly as she presses the call button.

It rings once, twice, and then you answer. “Leigh?”

“Hey. Sorry, did I wake you?” Leigh asks, picking up on the sleepiness in your voice.

“No, not at all. What’s up?”

She lets out a relieved sigh before rushing into an apology. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to leave you like that. Jules came home and then I—”

“It’s okay, Leigh,” you whisper soothingly, grateful that she called you back at all.

That doesn’t alleviate Leigh's guilt, though. She racks her brain for a way to make amends. 

“Can we… Can we pick up where we left off?” she suggests hesitantly.

You let out a kind chuckle. “I’d like that. But maybe we should save it for… later. Honestly, that was a bit reckless, Leigh.”

Leigh's brow furrows, even though you can't see it. “What do you mean?” she asks.

“I want to do this right,” you explain earnestly. “If taking things slow helps us build something real, then I’m willing to wait.”

“Well, clearly patience hasn’t been my strong suit either,” Leigh admits, her lips curving into a grin at your attempt to be chivalrous.

“I know,” you whisper, traces of a smile audible in your voice. “But I didn’t want you to think that’s all I’m after. And believe me, I want you—it’s driving me crazy.” 

Leigh runs her tongue along her teeth, feeling the familiar tug of desire low in her belly.

“I just don't want us to get so caught up in the physical stuff that we miss out on really getting to know each other,” you say.

“Me neither,” Leigh agrees, tucking the blankets up under her chin, pretending it's you keeping her warm.

“While I obviously enjoyed our…conversation earlier,” you say, pausing to maintain your composure. You can still hear the echo of Leigh's moans in your car, the memory likely to revisit you on sleepless nights in the coming days. “I'm really looking forward to diving deeper into things, like your favorite book, on Saturday.”

“Maybe I'll bring you a whole list,” she teases.

“Guess I’ll have to find that library card I signed up for then,” you joke.

“A library card, huh? Dork,” she retorts affectionately.

You feign a wounded tone, “Ouch.”

The laughter that follows is light and easy. You sigh contentedly and say, “I should probably call it a day. I’ve got an early start tomorrow.”

“Good night, Y/N.”

“Good night, Leigh.” I love you. “See you on Saturday.”

The call ends with both of you reluctantly hanging up, smiles fixed on your faces as you lie back. Leigh is an addictive rush, coursing through your veins like adrenaline. You've excused yourself out of habit for sleeping early, but you doubt you’re going to get much sleep tonight.

-

Leigh nudges open the door to the crowded bistro tucked near the Basically News office. It’s the thick of lunch hour, and the place pulses with the chatter of midday patrons. It’s exactly the sort of public, non-intimate setting you'd want for meeting an ex. She weaves through the crowded room, spotting Danny at a corner table, his focus tethered to his phone as he absently taps on the screen.

“Hey,” she greets, sliding into the chair opposite him.

Danny looks up, a hint of irritation flashing in his eyes. “You know, I could’ve just dropped by your house later.”

Leigh shakes her head. “It's better to meet somewhere public from now on.”

His expression darkens, and he scoffs. “Why? So Y/N doesn’t get jealous?”

Leigh leans back, crossing her arms. “Yes,” she says, deliberately blunt.

Danny's jaw sets, a muscle twitching slightly, but he doesn't press the issue. Instead, he reaches into his bag and retrieves a folder, sliding it across the table toward Leigh. “Matt’s publisher wants to release his comic posthumously,” he starts, “but there are strings attached.”

Interest sparks in Leigh's eyes as she opens the folder, her eyes quickly scanning the contract. 

“What kind of strings?” she asks.

“They want either you or me—or both of us—to join a group of artists to promote the comic—”

“That sounds fair and exciting,” Leigh interjects a bit too soon.

“—across the country,” Danny finishes, clicking his tongue in mild annoyance. “It’s a tour, Leigh.”

Leigh's fingers stall at the edge of the paper, the reality of the proposition sinking in. 

“A tour?” she echoes.

“Yeah,” Danny nods. He flags down a waiter and orders a beer. “Early next year. Matt’s comic is in the final stages of editing, and it should be finalized in about three weeks. They’re aiming for a release in February, and the tour will follow right after that.”

“That sounds soon,” Leigh remarks. “How long is the tour supposed to last?”

“About two months,” Danny replies. “We'll be traveling across different states, attending conventions, signing autographs, meeting fans. It’s a big commitment.”

“We?”

Danny shrugs, the hurt briefly flickering across his face before he can hide it. “Yeah, we. Though I'm not sure I can join because of the new job in Vegas. There's a good chance you might be doing this solo.” His attempt at nonchalance doesn't quite cover the sting of her reaction—how distant the concept of 'we' seems to her.

Leigh chews on her lip, her thoughts drifting to her own commitments—her column, her classes at the Beautiful Beast, and you. The idea of leaving all that behind, even for just a few months, feels like too great a sacrifice.

“It’s a lot to take in,” she says, pushing the folder back towards Danny. 

“He deserves this kind of recognition,” Danny implores, as if suggesting that Leigh thinks otherwise.

“I'm aware,” she snaps back, “I just need a bit of time to think it through, to sort out the schedules and everything.”

Danny raises his hands in mock surrender, indicating he doesn't want to escalate the argument. But Leigh knows him well enough to see through it—it’s a tactic. Danny has a way of guilting her into decisions without saying much, letting assumptions and insinuations simmer until Leigh finds herself making the choice he wants.

Leigh stands up, slipping the folder into her bag. “I’ll let you know as soon as I can.”

“Fine,” Danny says with a tight nod. “Just don’t drag your feet. The publishers are waiting on an answer soon.”

-

Saturday comes soon, but not soon enough.

All week, relentless rain showers have scattered across the days, and though the forecast promises sunshine today, Leigh wakes up to the soft splattering of rain against her window. The gentle patter seeps into her consciousness, easing her from sleep. The room is filled with a cool, damp scent, and is bathed in a soft, diffused light as the morning sun is muted behind thick clouds. 

Leigh gropes blindly beneath the pillow to her left, retrieving her phone and squinting at the time. It’s 9:30 AM. She blinks, trying to shake the sleep from her mind, and her heart drops slightly as she notices five missed calls from you, each one timestamped progressively: 7:45, 7:55, 8:15, 8:30, and finally 8:45.

Guilt twists in her chest. She sits up, brushing sleep from her eyes, and dials your number back, hoping she hasn’t missed something important. 

You answer on the first ring. “Hey. Everything okay?”

Leigh sighs, running a hand through her tousled hair. “Yeah, I'm sorry I missed your calls. I just woke up. What's going on?”

“It’s Saturday,” you say rather awkwardly. “We had plans to meet this morning, remember?”

Leigh sits up, suddenly fully awake. She’s been looking forward to Saturday all week, eagerly anticipating this date. The realization that she slept through most of the morning fills her with shame. She’s been so restless the past few days, and it was only the gloomy, sleepy weather last night that finally allowed her to get some decent rest.

“I’m sorry if I disturbed your sleep, but since it’s an all-day affair, I thought we could start with breakfast,” you continue, breaking the silence that had been filled only with Leigh’s soft breathing.

“Where are you now?” she asks.

You hesitate for a moment before replying, “I’m actually parked outside your house.”

Fuck. Shit. Damn it.

“Okay, okay. Sorry, uhm, can you give me five minutes?”

“Take all the time you need.”

Leigh ends the call and throws off the covers, scrambling to get dressed. She rushes to the bathroom, splashing water on her face and running a brush through her hair, muttering curses under her breath. Her hands tremble slightly as she picks out an outfit, the anticipation of the day ahead propelling her forward.

As she heads for the door, a small smile forms on her lips. This might not have been the flawless beginning she imagined, but just knowing you’re on the other side makes it perfect already.

[mymindcreatedthis]

Sharing a bed 18+

Kyra Cooney cross x Reader

Word count: 1,551

Summery: Reader and Kyra are roommates for camp. They get to the room and come to find out that there is only one bed and forced to share a bed. (Ps sorry this is a short one. This was one of the very first fan fics I did. When I first started writing fan fics 😂)

Warning: Smut, Teasing, Masterbation, Dirty Talk, unprotected sex, Creampies,

*Kyra’s pov*

Me and one of my teammates have been texting back and forth all day. Talking about life, soccer and then we start talking about Camp.

Me: Did coach send out any details about camp yet?

Steph: No not yet, but I heard we are getting a new girl this camp.

Me: Oh really? Who is the new girl.

Steph: The girls name is Y/n. She's kind of a no body, Coach went and saw her last year. She'll be joining us for camp tomorrow. I gotta go for now, I'll see you at camp tomorrow.

Me: Okay, I'll talk to you later.

Steph: Talk to you later.

My phone pings and it's a message from coach.

Coach: Hello Kyra! Hope everything is well, I'm texting you to inform you that you'll be rolling with Y/n this camp. I'll fill you in on the rest of the details tomorrow at camp. Your flight is at 6 am tomorrow, have a good day.

I sigh, I swipe up and turn my phone off. I toss it to the side, I've never met this girl so this is gonna be awkward as hell. I get up and start my packing and getting my things ready for camp. Once I'm done packing, I set my things off to the side. I grab my phone.

I go to our team's website. I find Y/n's number. I memorize her number and type her number in and text her.

Me: Hey Y/n. It's Kyra Cooney Cross I just wanted to reach out and tell you that I'm excited to meet you tomorrow and can't wait to see what you have to offer the team.

Y/n:Hey Kyra! Thank you for the welcome message. Can't with to meet you and the team.

Me: Can't wait to meet you either.

I put my phone on the charger, I set my alarm and go to bed. My alarm wakes me up, I turn it off and start getting ready. I put on sweats and a sweatshirt, i brush my teeth and hair. Once I'm done getting ready, I make sure I have everything. I grab my things and leave my apartment.

I make my way to the airport. I get to the airport and go inside, and wait for my flight. While waiting for my flight I look over and see a girl sitting by herself with her headphones on.

I be polite and send her a smile, she smiles back. My flight gets called, I sit in my seat and the mysterious girl sits next to me. After a 4 hour plane ride, we land.

I get my suit case, I leave the airport I wave over a cab. I catch a ride to the hotel. I thank the driver, I pay them. I grab my things and get out of the car.

I make my way into the hotel. I smile and greet the girls and coaches. Coach informs us on camp, we are dismissed and go up to our assigned rooms to get settled in.

I get to the room and see the same girl from the flight standing outside waiting for me. I smile at her and she smiles back.

"You must be Y/n." I say.

"Yes that's me." Y/n says.

We shake hands, I unlock the door and open it. We go inside, we set our things down off to the side. We look around the room and come to a realization.

"Um why is there only one bed?" I ask confused.

*Y/n's pov*

"Beats me." I reply.

"Hold on I'm gonna go talk to coach." Kyra says.

I nod, she leaves the room and comes back 10 minutes later. “All the 2 bed rooms are taken. This was the last one available." Kyra says.

I shrug. "I can sleep on the floor you can take the bed."

Kyra nods and gives in. We went out and hang out with some of the girls. We get back to the room around 12 am.

Kyra gets ready for bed, she brushes her teeth and gets in bed. I flip off the lights and lay down on my make shift bed on the floor. I pull the blankets over me and lay there staring at the ceiling.

15 minutes go by and Kyra speaks up. "Are you sure you don't wanna sleep in the bed with me?"

"Yeah it's okay, I promise." I say.

"Get your ass up here rookie before you fuck up your back." Kyra says.

I give in and get in bed with her. I didn't notice it until now, I had a massive boner. I begin to get nervous, nervous that Kyra would move and accidentally feel my boner poking her ass. Or Kyra noticing my boner over my blankets. What would she do? What would she say?

I turn, and lay down on my side. I was facing her back, I scoot back a bit putting a gap between us. Suddenly Kyra scoots towards me, I feel my boner poke her ass.

Y-Y/n, what's touching my ass?" Kyra asks.

I get nervous. "Ugh nothing." I reply.

Kyra’s breath hitches. "D-Do you have a boner?" She asks.

"Y-Yeah." I reply.

"Um okay...I don't know what to do." Kyra replies not knowing what to do in this situation.

"I'll rub one out real quick." I say.

"O-Okay." Kyra says.

A couple of minutes go by and I give up as I'm having a hard time getting a release.

"Y-You're still hard. I can feel it poking and rubbing against my ass." Kyra says.

"Nothing is working, it won't go away." I say.

I hear Kyra moving around. "Pull it out."

I slide my shorts and boxers off and toss them off to the side. Kyra turns on the lamp, Kyra wasn't wearing her sweats and panties anymore.

She was lying on her side with her ass towards me. She lifts her ass cheek up a bit. "Put it in."

I run my dick through her folds, once my tip is wet enough I slowly slide my dick deep inside her. Kyra moans, I let her take a moment to adjust to my size.

"Shit, you feel huge inside me." Kyra moans.

"Tell me when to move." I say.

Kyra moans and nods. She takes a moment. "M-move."

I start thrusting in and out of her slowly.

I pick up the pace and go a bit faster than before. The only sounds in the room were my balls slapping against her skin and our moans filling the room.

"Shit, you're really tight." I moan.

"F-Faster." Kyra moans.

I pick up the pace and go faster and faster.

"Shit...right...there." Kyra squeaks out with each thrust. After 10 more minutes I feel myself getting closer to cumming.

"Where do you want me to cum?" I ask.

"Just cum inside me." Kyra says.

"Are you sure?" I ask.

"Yes." Kyra replies.

I moan and continue to fuck her going faster and faster. A minute later I feel my balls tighten "I'm gonna cu-" I'm unable to warn her in time.

Creampie #1:

We both moan as I shoot my load deep inside her. Kyra moans and cums all over my dick. I help Kyra ride out her high, once we both come down from our highs I slowly pull out of her.

Thick cum immediately pours out of her and drips down her thigh and onto her bed.

"Wanna keep going?" She asks.

I blush darkly and nod. My dick was still covered in cum, I slowly push my dick back inside her and start thrusting in and out of her.

I grab onto her hips, my balls slap against her skin as I thrust in and out of her.

"Fill...me....up." Kyra squeaks out with each thrust.

I go faster and harder. Kyra moans. "Yes right there! I'm gonna fucking cum."

I go as fast and as hard as I can. By this point Kyra was screaming my name as I pound her pussy. My balls slap against her skin as our moans fill the room.

I feel my balls tighten. "I'm close." I moan.

"Me too, don't stop." Kyra moans.

Creampie #2:

We both moan as I bust my load deep inside her. Kyra moans and cums all over my dick. We both moan as I continue to pump her full of cum. I hold onto her hips as the last of my cum oozes Inside her.

I pull out and cum immediately pours out of her and drips onto the bed. I kiss her, Kyra is surprised but kisses back.

"Fuck you gelt good inside me." Kyra moans panting.

I blush darkly. "You're really good in bed."

We both lay down panting and trying to catch our breath. It was now 3 am, luckily we don't have anything going on tomorrow. So we can sleep in tomorrow morning. Kyra lays in my arms, I kiss her head and cuddle her.

"I think we'll get attack with questions by the team tomorrow morning." Kyra says.

I chuckle at her comment. "Yeah we will."

[cheriecoke]

Any dating Gojo headcannons?

ੈ✩‧₊˚ dating gojo headcanons

so starting this off by saying that if you’re in a relationship with gojo, there will be so many photos taken! they could be of both of you together, just you, just him, etc.

he likes to keep memories of all the times you’re together, and will scroll through all the photos when he’s feeling down or when you’re apart.

also, he also changes his lockscreen frequently to whatever recent photo of you has become his new favorite. <3

gojo will do absolutely everything in his power to make you laugh, especially if you’re feeling down.

at some times, he will be the most ridiculous boyfriend, but it's just bc he always wants to see you happy

whether or not you’re a sorcerer, gojo will introduce you to all his students!!

but... they already know everything there is to know about you because gojo talks about you non-stop. so when you do meet for the first time, hey feel like they’ve already met you before.

they definitely tease gojo about how you deserve someone better than him, especially nobara and megumi <3 though, it's all for fun and they are all genuinely so supportive of your relationship.

he makes you come to his classes as a "guest speaker." there is absolutely no learning done at these times. ever.

but you get to know the students better, and gojo loves seeing you interact with them. mostly, he just invites you to the school to see him and all the students know it.

because gojo takes care of megumi, you'll be the closest to him of all the students. and megumi is honestly tired of both of you, but he’ll tell gojo he likes you more just to annoy him.

gojo will take you out to eat a lot, especially at nice restaurants--but only if that’s your thing! if you'd rather eat at home or don’t feel comfortable at stuffy places, then he doesn’t care.

he just wants to spend time together and make you feel special bc you are!! <3

also, there will be so many dates to get a little treat. it doesn’t matter what, if its sweet, gojo will be buying it.

if you don’t like sweets… gojo will probably still buy you one so you can try it (and then he'll just eat it himself).

gojo loves when you wear his clothes, even if they fit you horribly. he starts leaving tshirt and sweatshirts at your home in the hopes that you’ll wear them when you’re lounging around

expect a lot of stupid texts or phone calls, and always at inconvenient times.

he sends you things that make no sense. then sends you screenshots of when he sent them to nanami and got left on read.

gojo sends a lot of screenshots of him annoying nanami. it's honestly his favorite hobby

every time you walk into a room, gojo will smile so brightly to the point that people notice and start teasing him about it. he doesn't care though :)

he is always excited to see you, even if you’ve only been apart for five minutes

we all know gojo's got generational wealth, so he’s going to spoil you all the time. don't protest bc he loves spending money on you. gift giving is def a love language of him.

so he's always buying you gifts, whether they’re just random things that reminded him of you, unnecessary items he secretly wanted for himself, or extensive, thought out gifts he’s been contemplating for a while.

gets you big bouquets of flowers all the time.

once he sees that one of the flowers is wilting, he’s on his way to buy another. he’ll switch up which flowers he gets depending on what looks the best during the season.

but if you have an absolute favorite flower, he’ll gravitate towards those <3

he uses an excessive amount of pet names. sticks to the classics most of the time, but when he’s feeling silly, he'll whip out something so ridiculous you will cringe

when you’re out in public, he usually keeps a hand on you somewhere, just so he can reassure himself you’re nearby. he doesn’t expect that any curses are going to sneak up on him, but he knows better than to take a stupid risk like that.

teases you so much it’s almost painful, but he knows when he’s taking it too far. he’ll never do anything to upset you.

he's pretty good at reading you, but he wants you to know the you can always talk to him about anything! he doesn't want his partner to be scared of talking to him, because he knows that communication is important

(even if he's sometimes bad at it.)

at the end of the day, he is going to be the most supportive person in your life, and he just wants to feel as happy as you make him

if he’s been away for work, or had a particularly rough day, he’ll be extra clingy.

he loves cuddling <3

i feel like there will be lots of movie watching dates on the couch (though expect that this will lead to something more)

he won’t (always) do it on purpose, but he likes seeing you get jealous.

gojo’s pretty flirtatious by nature, but he’ll make sure that you know it doesn’t mean anything if he smiles a little too much at the barista, or talks to the waitress a bit too friendly.

but he would also be lying if he said he disliked the annoyance that would spread on your face, and he’d kiss you even harder once you were back home.

gojo’s outwardly very confident, but secretly, he wants a lot of reassurance from you.

initially, he tries to do things that will get a lot of compliments from you. you eventually pick up on this and just shower him in affection

and when you’ve said you loved him, he will ask you to say it all the time. <3

gojo loves taking you on shopping dates and watching you model all of the clothes. he will be no help at picking things out because he’ll think you look good in everything!!

he can be quite spontaneous, so whatever you want to do, he’s always up for it.

gojo falls first, but he doesn’t tell you first. he’s honestly a bit insecure that he’s not enough for you and waits for you to say “I love you” first.

honestly, he decides pretty early on in the relationship that you’re the person he wants to spend the rest of your life with.

but... he waits a while to propose because he’s a sorcerer and he knows that things in his life could change at any moment.

he will love you so so much <3

[sunshyni]

big boy energy

Jisung × Fem!reader

notes: this is my first text in English, so I'm feeling nervous 😬 English is not my native language, so forgive me for any errors or mistakes like that!! And that's it!! I hope you enjoy it!!

w.c: 0,7k

tw: none

I don't even know if this is good. I write more to see how my English vocabulary is doing, but anyway!!

Good read, sweeties!! ❤️

Your older brother's getting married in a few months, and dance lessons were scheduled for the couple and the godparents to avoid any embarrassment on the big day. Right now, you have no clue who your dance partner will be because your brother keeps saying, “Her right dance partner will show up any minute”.

You're chilling in a chair, adjusting your high heels for dancing, when you hear a noise from the salon door, and your eyes immediately snap in that direction.

— Hey guys, am I late? Sorry, my flight was delayed — Says the guy standing by the door. Jisung looks taller and stronger than the last time you saw him, but he still has that same sparkle in his eyes from when you were kids. Jisung, just two years older than you, used to mess with your braids all the time.

It was tough when he left town to study and work in Korea, his country of origin. You couldn't help but miss him, even though it seemed like he didn't give a damn about leaving you behind.

You kinda resented him for that because you've always had a thing for him, but he either didn't notice or didn't feel the same. I mean, you used to like him, but now that you see him another time, your heart can't help but race.

— Jisungie! You're not tired, are you? — Your brother asks. Jisung, dressed all black, looks even hotter than usual — I've got a mission for you.

— I'm good, let's do it — Jisung says, meeting your gaze with a nostalgic sweetness. You finally stand up, and thankfully, you don't trip and fall flat on your face.

— You'll be dancing with my sister, okay? — Your brother practically pushes Jisung in your direction. Jisung smiles at you, and all you can do is cross your arms and scowl.

— I hate you both — You mutter to Jisung and your brother as he heads back to his fiancée, sticking his tongue out at you in a teasing way. The dance teacher starts the class, and you even have the chance to complain to Jisung. He holds you tighter, causing you some agitation, but all you can focus on is trying to breathe normally while his face is so close to yours.

— Did you miss me, shawty? — He asks, leading the dance with skill, not like the same boy from years ago who learned to salsa from “Shall We Dance?” while you were sighing over the charmer Richard Gere.

— I'm not giving you the answer you want, Andy Park — You say, and Jisung chuckles softly in your ear, sending shivers down your spine, but you brush them off, wrapping your arms around his neck like they were made to be there.

— I prefer when you call me Jisungie, babe.

— I preferred it when you didn't leave me alone, babe — You retort, stepping on his feet. Jisung lets out a low groan but still holds you close, dancing like there's no one else in the room.

— I'm sorry for letting you down all this time. I'm an asshole, it's true — Jisung admits, acknowledging all the times you two didn't talk when you really wanted to, even if it was just to argue, something you did a lot as kids — Can we make peace, pretty please? Go back to the way things used to be?

You hesitate for a moment before letting a small smile slip.

— Like the old times, huh?

— But this time, I really wanna kiss you — Jisung whispers in your ear, and your heart feels like it's about to leap out of your chest. You feel his cheek against yours, and if you don't answer him soon, you might just pass out.

— Andy...

— Keep calling me like that, and I'll kiss you right here, not giving a fuck about your brother and my best friend — He says, planting a soft kiss on your cheek, leaving you dizzy with his scent filling the room, making it hard to breathe. You muster up the courage to speak, looking into his eyes.

— When did you get this big boy energy?

— I don't know, but you better enjoy it, cutie.

[baronessvonglitter]

Cherry, Cherry 🍒 Chapter 10 🍒

"Secrets & Lies"

pre-outbreak! AU!Joel Miller x f!Reader

Word count: 3,023

Summary: you and Joel find out just how fond the heart grows during absence.. meanwhile your mom makes a call and you find out a secret about your cousin..

WARNINGS: 18+ Only! Mature and Explicit, age gap (reader is 18, Joel is 35), takes place in summer 2003, dbf!Joel (still counts if he hasn't seen said friend in years), sexting, sexy pics, use of pet names ('daddy' for Joel, 'sweetheart' for reader), overbearing mothers, secret relationship, oral (m&f receiving), fluff, a smidgen of insecure!Joel, talk of 'adult viewing', candid discussion about sex & expectations, reader's race never mentioned, no use of y/n

Author's Note: as per a few previous chapters, I'm trying to give a more realistic side of deciding to have sex (or not, as in this chapter) without it being too black and white. There's a lot of passion between reader and Joel, but he's not using it to his advantage, keeping her boundaries but still wishing she'd say yes. Thanks to everyone showing appreciation for this series, which is the first fic I ever wrote and is so near and dear to my heart.

Series Masterlist

Joel is with Tommy in San Antonio for business and even though it's only for two days, you miss him as though he's taken a part of you with him. Your last text, a simple I miss you, has gone unanswered and you don't want to bother him while he's busy, but his silence creates an emptiness, a longing that makes you half-crazy with the idea of driving down to San Antonio just to see him. But he's left Sarah in your care, and you know it's better to be distracted with her presence.

Though she tells you she's used to being on her own in situations like this, she stays at your house anyway, taking up residence in your room, your queen size bed big enough for both of you to sleep in. Your mind flits back to recent memories of the things you've done with her dad in this very bed, things you hope you'll get to do with him again very soon.

Just as you close your eyes your phone vibrates on the nightstand next to you, lighting up with an incoming text. This late, it can only be Joel. Your heart does a little dance as you reach for your phone, and even though Sarah is fast asleep, you feel the need for privacy. You go to the living room and make yourself comfortable on the sofa.

Joel: I wish you were in my arms right now

You smile like an idiot and get even more comfortable, typing out a response. if I was we would be getting to know each other better than ever.. how's it going over there?

Joel: It's just all right.. I have some plans for you when I see you, sweetheart.

You: tell me, in detail, and we'll do them when you come back

Joel: I'd rather do them now..

You: patience is a virtue. if you want me right now you'll have to kidnap me :D

Joel: Patience ain't my strong suit so I must not be that virtuous. If you think I won't kidnap you, you're wrong. I'll do anything to be with you.

You: i'm sure you have rope and duct tape in your toolkit.. sounds like a good time to me

Joel: I do, and I have no problem using them to get what I want ;-)

You: i love you.. your persistence may come in handy when you come back this weekend

Joel: I love you too, and I hope I come in VERY handy this wekend.

You: speaking of handy, guess where my hand is now.. While Joel is stunned by your message, you quickly snap a picture of your hand slipping inside your panties and send it to him. I'll leave this to your vivid imagination.. good night <3

The next day you're at the mall with Sarah when your phone rings. You don't recognize the number but you know it must be Joel, maybe calling from the motel room phone. Sarah is looking at jewelry at Claire's when you step out to answer your cell. "Hey daddy, I was wondering when you were gonna call me.." you practically purr into the phone.

There's a pause on the other end, though you hear chatter and noise in the background, Your mom's voice comes through the other end, saying your name in a confused manner. Your heart sinks into your stomach and you have the urge to vomit. You can't believe you've just said those words to your own mother. "Hey.. mom. What are you doing?"

"I'm calling from Larry's cell. We're in Cancun. Who's daddy? Did you finally get in touch with your father?" There's both hope and disdain in her voice, and you just want to crawl into the earth and blanket the dirt over you.

"I, uh, have bad reception here. I thought it was Sofia calling me. It's a stupid little game we play, like we're calling from a sex hotline or something," you scramble for an excuse, grimacing at how you've botched it and praying she won't ask more questions. "And no, unfortunately I haven't heard from Dad. I don't think we ever will."

"Well, don't answer the phone like that again. It's not very ladylike," she says in her typical, overbearing fashion.

"So.. you and Larry are in Cancun? Are you having fun?" you desperately change the subject.

"Yes and it's wonderful! We've been.."

You try to pay attention, but as usual your mom is making it all about her. Not once does she ask about you but you know the moment she's done she'll find something about you to criticize in her usual backhanded way.

Sarah approaches you, having bought a bracelet and showing it to you, asking where you want to go next, if you are as hungry as she is for a Cinnabon. She quiets when she sees you on your phone, but it's too late.

"Who is that?" your mom asks.

"Uh.. Sarah Miller.. I'm babysitting her." Sarah glowers at you and gives you a playful shove. "Ow! I mean, we're hanging out."

"It's great that you're making friends.. did you say her last name is Miller?"

"Yeah, I.. think so.."

"Don't tell me she's that man's daughter."

Your brain is stuck in deciding to play dumb or not. "What man?"

"Joel Miller. That man who lives next door to you and your cousin. He was close with your father a long time ago."

"Oh? Wow, that's really cool." You are not doing a great job of sounding uninvolved. "Maybe he has some stories about Dad from back in the day," you offer lamely.

"I didn't like him then and I don't like him now." Your mother is emphatic. "He was always up to no good and even got your father mixed up in his antics."

There's a story there. "I'm sure people can change over the course of twenty years, Mom." You feel the need to defend the man you're in love with, though it does create a little itch within you that you don't know much about his past. You two have been more concerned with the present and all its indulgences.

Your mom simply says, "Hmph."

"Well, I gotta go.. Sarah needs a nap and maybe a bottle of milk." You laugh as she takes a swipe at you again.

"You don't call to check in often enough.. I hope you're behaving yourself and not giving your cousin anything to worry about."

Your blood runs cold. You have always wondered if your mom has a supernatural gift for knowing what's on your mind, as if you secretly and silently project a mental image of your guilt. Even when you were a kid you could imagine her death glare on you when you were thinking about doing something bad. If she had even a wisp of an idea of what you're up to with Joel..

"I'm sorry, and I promise I'll call more often. I'm just trying to enjoy myself before school starts."

"All right, honey," she sighs. "I love you. Be good."

"Yeah, I love you too." You end the call.

Sarah notices the look on your face as you continue walking through the mall. "What was that about?"

"Uh, that was my mom. She's on vacation with her boyfriend. She told me to say hi to your dad."

That night you get a text from Joel. Have Sarah stay at a friend's house tonight. I'm coming home early. Need to see you.

Once again there's that little thrill of anticipation that surges through you. can't wait! gonna ride with some friends to the boonies to see a garage band if you wanna come with

Almost immediately he sends, Ditch those plans. Get ready for me.

You make the plans and drop Sarah at her friend's place. Back at your own you wait, dressed in your party clothes just in case Joel can't come home after all. It's almost eleven when you see his truck headlights through your front window. You tentatively walk out, catching a glimpse of him as he alights from his truck and you immediately head his way. "Sarah gone?" he asks, pressing into you on the front porch. You can only nod. "And Sofia?" he continues.

"It's just us," you whisper, and he lifts you up to kiss you, your bodies covered in the darkness of the porch. On the stairs to his room you leave a trail of clothes you've removed, kissing and groping each other to make up for the time you've missed with each other. "Gonna take ya with me next time," he murmurs, lifting you, squeezing your ass as he finds your panties and starts to pull them down. "That naughty picture you sent really got me goin'.. you're a little tease ain't ya?" His voice is gravelly yet soft, intimate in your ear.

On the bed he maneuvers you how he wants, on his back with you riding his face. You don't give it a second thought, bracketing his head with your thighs as you press down to him, giving a yelp as his tongue laps against you, eager, almost impatient. One hand strokes his cock while the other fondles your breasts, running his large palms over them and cupping their heft.

You learn to move against him, grasping his hair as he sticks his tongue inside you, or presses your clit between his lips. It's ecstasy, using him for your own pleasure, and only once you've come does he have you turn around, and gently guides you to lean over his body so that you can take his cock into your mouth.

Knees still shaking from your orgasm, he helps hold you up, giving you a second helping as you take him into your mouth. You work the first few inches while stroking him, your concentration breaking as he artfully brings you up to speed again with his mouth, running his tongue across your folds and holding your hips still above him.

He's already on edge and by now you know exactly what he needs to cum. While stroking him with one hand you run a gentle tongue over his balls, eliciting a grunt from him and he twitches in your grasp. Smirking to yourself, you continue it, and his grip on your hips tightens as his moans reverberate on your pussy, causing you to cry out as well. Cumming together, you press yourself down against his willing mouth while his cum shoots out, dripping down onto your hand grasping it, and you lick it, cleaning it all up.

Moments later, you lay in each other's arms. "I thought that was something they only do in porn," you tell him.

He raises a brow. "You watch porn?"

"Yeah, sometimes.. don't you?"

He shrugs. "Now and then.. I s'pose it's easier than goin' out and findin' someone. But you know that shit ain't real. It's all fantasy. I don't want you to think I have any expectations of you."

You snuggle against him. "Even if you did, I'd do my best to live up to yours."

Joel just smiles and strokes your hair. "Once you sent that pic last night I had no choice but to cut the trip short. I dropped off Tommy at his place and some chick drove up just after I left."

"Just like that, huh? At least he wasn't alone."

You feel the curve of his smile against your hair. "At first I was afraid you'd like him better. He's younger, better suited to your age."

"Joel!" you look at him, surprised by this sudden confession. "I like him but I love you. In fact.. I wish I'd been born earlier. I would have liked to meet you as a teenager."

"I don't know if you would've liked me then. You probably would've been the girl I was too afraid to talk to."

"I definitely would've liked you. I was such a geek that you wouldn't have noticed me."

He sits up and you sit with him, still wrapped in his embrace. "Wait, you were a geek? What kinda geek were ya? Was you a sci-fi geek? Or a comic book geek?"

You laugh at his amusement. "A little of both. Plus a marching band geek. What about you, what were you like in high school?" Your mom's warning from earlier looms in the back of your mind, like an oven burner left on and you scramble for the switch to turn it off.

"Well I was a sports freak back then. I was on the football and wrestling teams. I even wrestled at state level."

It was a turn on to think of him, your own age, playing under the Friday night lights, or pinning someone down to the gym mat. "You were a jock, huh? I can see that.. Jesus, I would have loved to see that."

"You just like seein' me all shirtless and sweaty, don't ya?"

"You mean like right now?" you smirk, trailing your fingertips down his chest and to his happy trail. "Want to hop in the shower with me? I have to be up early because Sofia's coming home tomorrow."

In the shower together, Joel watches how the water rains over your skin, making it glisten. He's speechless as you slowly turn, letting the water drench your hair. "Sweetheart, I'm not sure I'm gonna be able to keep my hands off ya."

"Don't keep your hands off me," you say, bringing him under the spray with you and kissing him. He slowly pushes you against the wall, deepening the kiss and running his hands along your curves. His cock is like a hot poker against your belly. You moan into his kiss, especially when you feel his fingers glide over your cunt. You feel so small in his embrace and yet equal, more beloved than anything on this earth.

Joel lifts up your thighs, holding you in place by your hips, as if you weigh practically nothing. You feel the pressure, the gentle nudge of his cock at your entrance. "Oh sweetheart, I can't wait any longer."

You put your hands on his shoulders to hold yourself up, lightly squeezing them, seeing what strength he possesses. "Joel.. I don't know.. it feels good, I just don't know."

He's trying to control his breathing, waiting for a definitive answer from you.

"I want to stop. I'm sorry, I just think we're moving too fast."

He sighs. "I understand." And he gently puts you down.

"It's just.. I've been building up this moment in my mind for weeks now and I want things a certain way: rose petals on the bed, candles, music.. super romantic. I know how silly that sounds, I just don't want to have my first time in the shower."

"We're gonna do this how you want it," he assures you. "And if I may make a suggestion.. I have a friend who owns a cabin out on the lake. We could spend a weekend up there. Would you like that?" He lifts your chin to look into your eyes.

"That's perfect! Because I was thinking July fourth would be the best time.. lots of fireworks, very celebratory.. what do you think?"

He smiles. "I think we have ourselves a plan for next weekend."

Very early the next morning you slip your shorts back on and lean down to kiss Joel as he sleeps. It's almost time for Sofia to be home.

"What time is it?" he asks groggily.

"It's 3 A.M." You put your shoes on. "God damn it you look so cute right now. I don't want to leave.."

"Then don't." He takes your hand and pulls you back to the bed.

"I'm not that easy," you say, despite climbing back into bed. "I held out on my ex for an entire year. I can make you wait too, Joel Miller."

He laughs a little. "Sweetheart, I am never going to wait that long. Don't test me."

You trace the outline of his face. "I don't think I could wait a year for you. But in a way I've waited my whole life for you."

The rest is unsaid as he takes you into his arms for another kiss, which leads to your clothes being taken off again.

When you wake again you read the bedside clock and panic. "I completely forgot! Sofia's gonna kill me!" you rush to get dressed, thinking in the back of your mind that you've tossed your clothes to the floor and put them on again so many times this night. Joel's up too, worried because you're worried. While rushing out of his house you freeze. Next door in the driveway Sofia's getting out of a car. Her hair is messy and her clothes look wrinkled. She makes eye contact with you then behind you at Joel, who's rushing after you.

You spin around towards him. "Hey Mr. Miller, everything's fine! You can pay me later, I'm always happy to babysit Sarah," you overact it, hoping he plays along.

"I stayed out late and when I got back your cousin was fast asleep on the couch. I didn't have the heart to move her," Joel says, hands in his pockets as he tries to charm Sofia into the lie.

Sofia looks at both of you but says nothing, and out of the driver's seat of her ride comes Tommy. "Everything okay, babe?" He looks at Sofia, at you, at Joel. All four of you are connecting the pieces of the puzzle.

Joel speaks first. "Tommy, are you and Sofia...?"

Tommy replies 'yes' while Sofia says 'kind of.'

"And you?" Sofia asks of you. "Are you and Joel..?"

You exchange glances with this man who's become your lover, who's shown you the greatest pleasure you've ever known, who eats you out for hours when you finally have alone time, who's cum you've taken down your throat and whose taste is still on your tongue.

"She's my daughter's friend," Joel says defensively. "And I'm makin' sure she gets home okay."

He omits the fact that you love each other.

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dividers by @saradika-graphics 👑

[danaduchy]

all texts from Judy

How's it going? ¡Hola! How you doin, V? Find those voodoo boys yet? * Sure did Hope you found what you were looking for? It was pretty interesting. Helped em out a little * That I did Helped them expand their turf, had a little run-in with netwatch, took a trip down cyberspace lane and met an AI * Didn't think you cared all that much… Course I do! After what you did for Evelyn… You're not just some rando anymore

* Not yet I can imagine * Been kinda busy As are all. Well good luck with your search * You know, same ol' same ol' Uhh… sure, alright O_O Dont really wanna get into details right now Sure, whatever works for you, but V… Take care of yourself, OK? I don't want you to end up like Ev * What about Evelyn? Any improvement? No changes. She's trapped deep in her brain somewhere. Must be goin through hell * It wont come to that Good to know Sorry, gotta run See ya

Ev's send off Hey Buried Ev today Colombarium near North Oak Thought you might wanna know * How do you feel? I intend to get thoroughly shitfaced today * Thanks for letting me know Right, no problem. Take care.

Got an idea Hey, V! Hey. Wanted to thank you again. Ya know, for helping me with Clouds Don't wanna think about what coulda happened if you hadn't been there Anywho, I think I got somethin that might help us Can't go into detes yet, but I'll holler at ya in a couple days Oh, and have a FABULOUS day! ;)

Morning! Mornin, sleepyhead Had to run, didn't wanna wake u Left you some breakfast. Eat up!

Thank you Knock knock Whatup? How's things? * I'm good * You know how it is Why? Somethin the matter? Had a great time in spite of the circumstances. All thanks to you Maybe we could do it again, just without spillin any blood :/ * Anytime Can't wait ;) * But thats what I'm good at… …True. Anyway, still waitin for Maiko to spill the detes on our meet Call you when I know more

Thanks again Heyo, V Everything ok? * Yeah, I'm good * Same as ever * Somethin happen? I'm all right… Thanks again. You know for what ;) You're a good friend. Just want you to know that Maiko still hasn't called. Should be anytime now Let you know when I get somethin fresh

All set Hey V. Maiko just called. We're all set. This afternoon, out in front of H8. Assuming you'll be there? Take care till then. And thanks… Again. It really means a lot to me.

Waiting on you Something urgent come up? Oh well, I'll just wait. Just be here before 8am

Come back Hey come back! I'm not gonna wait forever!!

We're waiting Still don't have time? We're waiting

Later then… Musta been in a real hurry… I'll try to come up with something, like, doable, but also fuckin mindblowing Be in touch. See ya soon

Umm… yeah So… looks like you weren't into it Oh well. Guess that's that then… About to finish packing and then I'm off. Buh-bye!

Bye Won't keep you long Ditching NC soon… I'm done with this sorry-ass excuse for a city Whatever you're up to right now - good luck [You have been deleted from Judy Alvarez's contacts]

Your payment Heeeyo! Sendin you the €$, just as I promised ;) Thank you, thank you, thank you for your help! Laterzzz!

WTF?! Nicely played, V. Very mature Whatever happened to the fearless merc named V? But you didn't have the guts to look me in the eyes Miserable * I was in a rush * I was really craving some fries Save it, V Don't message me again * Can we just talk about this? I'm sorry OK, I'll leave you alone. I'm really fucking sorry * You're really just gonna ghost me now? C'mon Judy, srsly? Fine, no means no I guess…

Our BD Heya, V Starting tuning our virtu - got me thinkin about you again. Got no idea how much Im digging this right now. Splicing two emotive tracks together is super hard - theres a lotta noise I need to filter out for this to come out baby-soft, but the contrast in our reactions… I mean, it'll give you shivers. Don't even have to amplify the emotional tracks. N O V A * Yeah.. sounds super cool No, it's fuckin AWESOME. And the best thing is, it's not pretentious or nothing. Totally relatable * Thats cute Cuteness has nothin to do with it, mi calabacita * Hehe, looks like someone's havin a good time Laugh all you want, calabacita. Its nova anyway * Calaba-wha? Nvm, nothing xD * Seriously? You callin me a pumpkin? Callin me FAT?! Noooooooo silly XD Nicer than callin you a gonk though Alright, I gotta go. Byeeee

Memory Hey calabacita! Still playin around with our virtu - found a still you might like

* Woah not bad Glad you like it * You enhance this? Just a teeny bit, nothin crazy Dunno, I like it. maybe I'll frame it and hang it up on the wall Could do the same for you if you want * Deffo. I'd love one Alrighty, I'll send it over when it's ready * Not really my thing, sorry Hehe, and you still ask why you're a calabacita <3 Okidokes, don't wanna keep ya. Catch ya later ;)

Helloooo Yooohoooo Know wat rymes with judy? BOOTY uh-huh uh-huh your so cuuuutee * Hey… you OK? You sound… weird * Lemme guess - you're wasted Jus out wit some ferns. frieends. * Okaaay, so you are drunk * Definitely drunk Weeeeeell… maybe jus a littl bit? * You could at least send me some stills * Just don't go too crazy, alright? * Pics or it didn't happen Sure <(((*> …fine, knock yourself out :D

I'm so sorry I'm sorry. And a little embarrassed -_- * How are ya? Sounds like you had a fun night Feel like some took a chainsaw to my brain * Maybe I should start putting you on a leash Start keeping my girl in line xD Try it, go ahead and I'll… I dunno. I'm too tired to come up with a comeback * Anything I can do to help? Nah, I'll be fine. I'm just tired. * I miss anything fun? Nah, not really. Just a girls night out. Couple substances, neverending tequila… you get the idea. Roxanne says hi, btw. Or did she? Talk to you later. Gonna go back to bed Before I forget, I got something for you. Sent it to your apartment. Sorry again… -_-' G'night

Got something for ya Heyoooo Got a lil somethin for ya. Should help get you get on your feet - who knows, maybe it'll come in handy down the line It's waitin for you over at mine - near the kitchen counter ;) * Awesome. Thanks Don't mention it :) * What is it? Not big on surprises, are ya? Nothin super special, don't get your hopes up. Couple of energy bars to keep your battery charged ;) Oh and I found a 12 gauge. Got it some time ago from the Mox. Don't really see myself needin it * Sounds great, I'll try it out * No such thing as too much iron Like a fly to ointment… Shoulda figured :P Watch out for yourself, OK? I know you've got shit goin on and that you're playin a high stakes game… But you're too young for me to be visiting your grave. Just sayin Welp, that got a little darker than I intended. Anyway, just be careful

Noticed something… Just opened my wardrobe and my favorite MaxTac uniform's gone! Someone's been naughtyyy! I'm gonna have to teach you a lesson ;) Hope at least you can put it to good use Errrr maybe I shouldn't say that. Especially when I'm not around ;) Nvm. Forget I said anything!

About the car Here's a good one - how do you know when NC's too crowded? When your ride disappears and you have to fuckin walk. ON. FOOT. Hope you enjoyed the ride. Next time just give me a heads up :P

Later V Hey V I'm leaving, V. For good. Can't stand it here any longer Wanted to tell you before, but you were gone. Sorry I guess it's better this way. Leavin everything behind, old hangups included. Once and for all Hope you come out of your thing in one piece Bye, V [You have been deleted from Judy Alvarez's contacts]

Hello from Oregon! Check this out

Hellooo from breezy Oregon!! * So is that the key to the meaning of life? The beach? xP Nah, more like sittin on my ass and doin nothin for once. It's relaxing Sorta. As much peace and quiet as you can get with my grams * Visiting your grams and gramps? Yeah showed up on their doorstep a few days ago. Dunno if they were happy or confused… Pretty nice being with family. Good people, good food, zero bullshit How's life in NC? Hangin in there? * Peachy as ever Still got that relic. But I'm workin on it * Could be better. Could be worse Still breathin. Guess thats somethin… You'll figure it out, V. You always do Gotta go. The elders are summoning me

On the road

Road's full of adventure

Hey from Seattle!

Seattle's calling! * Why Seattle? * What're you doing there? They got a pretty nova virtu studio here. Wanted to check it out from up close Maybe I'll rent out space for a couple days, play around with their tech, do some experimenting. We'll see But I'm not plannin on stayin long * Why not? Didn't leave NC just to end up right where I started. Least not right now Cuz otherwise it'll just be the same shit, different place * Where to after? Gonna head east. Roam around the country a bit Prolly wont have a sig for a while Hang in there, alright? * I'll try I'm sure you'll manage just fine * No promises Shoulda seen that comin. But I'm sure you'll manage just fine If I'm ever back in NC, we can crack some beers on the roof and you'll tell me everything And I probably won't believe any of it xP Anyway… Bye, V.

random ¡Hola calabacita! Thinking about you <3 Wanna guess what? * Wait, are you trying to sext right now? Because in that case, I'd better find a nice quiet spot… Wow what year is it, 2000? Please, you know braindance gets the job done muuuuch better. * Mmm, think you should show me sometime ;) You got it… Course, it's still not as good as realspace. * Ain't nothin' like the real thing baybaaaay Haha, true true * Yeah, think I saw something like that in an old movie once. Super weird :/ Aaaah, yeah, think I know the one. Classic. And yeah, nothin like the real thing ;) Now I forgot what I was gonna write. Ehhh, maybe it'll come back to me. Talk soon :) * Hmm… Wondering if I can do a double backflip with a full twist? The answer is yes. Good to know! But… no. Was just thinking if you were an animal, you'd be a dog. * Cause I'm cute and cuddly? Yeah, obvi… But you're also loyal. Woman's best friend and all that. * Cause I'm your fierce protector? Yeah. And the best friend I've ever had. * OK gimme a sec, there's gotta be a joke about tongues and licking in here somewhere… … you're the woooooorst I lvoe it xD Anywho, enough distractions, back to work for me * That if I were an animal, I'd totally be a dog. Because I'm cute, loyal and love to lick eeeeeverything wow Not sure if I should be blown away that you read my mind, or offended and disappointed at your crass attempt at a "joke" * Be blown away! I dunno, the licking… Please, you love it ;) I… yeah I do xD * You're complex, you contain multitudes, you can feel both at once. Haha true, I can xD

God pls no Shit Shit on a fucking shit cracker OK so… I uh, I was talking to my grams and I accidentally told her about you I'm just warning you, she might try to contact you… I'm sorry -.- Didn't give her your detes obviously, but she's got mad detective skills for her age. Honestly don't know how she does it. I'm so so sorry. * shiiiit Exactly * Haha big oops. You think it'll be that bad though? Just picture the DataKrash, that's the sort of destruction she's capable of. * Don't worry, I got this. OK…. And I got my fingers crossed for ya You do realize you can't shoot your way outta this one, right? * Hilarious Learn from the best ;) * Ugh, you win Like I always do :P So what can I expect? Basically a 5 ft 2 pitbull trained in advanced interrogation techniques But she's really sweet once u get to know her! * So I can't just ignore her, right? I mean you could try, but… Not really possible with her. * Come on, no way it's that bad I mean it, your little ol' abuela can't be that scary. Yeah… positive thinking, that's the way. Let's just say you've been warned. Please please please be nice and let me knwo how it goes, ok?

So my grams * Holy shit, Ainara Alvarez is one tough cookie I know, just got off the holo with her * You weren't joking about your abuela * Still breathing! Just got off the holo with my grams * Hope she didn't datakrash me She loves you <3 * And? I think she's a bit sceptical. …but she's always like that so :P * Do I even wanna know? Nothin' to worry about Don't think you two really hit it off Man if you two ever meet, it's gonna be good O_O Thanks for talking to her, V. I know she can be alot You're the best Just talked to my grams wow is she pissed. Take it you just blocked her? Yeah, I'm sorry. Hm, ok… * I panicked and blocked her omg Now I get why she compared you to Maiko * I can't deal with this drama right now Drama? OK… I'm sorry Listen… I know you got a lot on your plate right now. My abuela's not your top priority I get it. talk later

<3 So V… I need to tell you something. * Shoot. Just gotta get something off my chest * You're an NUSA sleeper agent And you just got burned. Bad. All you can do now is wipe your files, cover your tracks and flee this city of broken promises, never to return. WHAT?! O_O Great story, but no :P * Sounds like the start of every breakup text I've ever gotten What?! NO! Shit, didn't realize how that sounded Anyway, it's just that… Ok so you know I'm not great with feelings and stuff… But I've been thinking about the past few months and I wanna say thanks, V. For being with me, for everything you've done. And just for being you You're great. Just wanted you to know that. But now I gotta go hide somewhere, I'm all flushed -.- <3 * Awwwww my sweet little vulnerable leelou bean Jesus christ stop xD it's not funny!!! * <3 :) * No YOU'RE great. Quit it with the charm bub You're making it worse!

Yo, what up? * All good The queen of curt replies -_- Ok, well you know where to find me and how to make up for blowing me off. I don't like being taken for granted. * Stuff's been going down - I'm on a super-weird gig in Dogtown. Kay, so two things to unpack - "weird" and fucking DOGTOWN?! Start with the first. * I thought that's what you found attractive about me? ;) I signed up for the full package, so can't complain :) Not even about the expiry date…? You're really good at distracting me from work -_-  We're all fucked in the end anyway, right? But I like to think that at any given moment we're both immortal - and those are the moments that count, every single time. Damn, that's deep * I like the idea of immortality in the now. It's like with animals - they don't know they can die until they're faced with real danger. Then they forget. * I don't think I'm in the same headspace rn because I'm working. I'll hit you up when I'm done :) Sure thing. Judy out. *  I'm just getting warmed up Cut the foreplay and spill the detes already You're really good at distracting me from work -_-  Oh, sorry Miss Professional-all-of-a-sudden I'm at work too - it's just sometimes I need to take my mind off it to not go crazy

* Can I text you when I'm done? * Glad to know I'm what's keeping you sane :) Sooooo… Whatcha doin? Nothing much - on a gig like any other Aaaand her highness has returned. I won't press for detes >.< * Probably shouldn't. Don't wanna put you at risk - better safe than sorry. Ok, putting jokes aside for a sec - sounds pretty serious. You sure its safe? Should I worry? Cuz you know, it's Dogtown - not exactly the safest place, is it? * You dont need to - I'm a big girl. Can take care of myself. I know, I know, I'll stop mothering you. If you say everything's fine, then I believe you :) * I'm chasing a promising lead for the biochip - it's worth a bit of risk. Ok, well, I'd assume that you've got a handle on things, so I won't lecture you. I'll just keep my fingers crossed. But if thinkin nice thoughts about you is any help, then just know that I am <3 Keeping me safe by sending positive vibes? A kind of hobby of mine. I take it pretty serious. Maybe something'll come of it. * Guess we'll see - maybe with your help I'll wrap up sooner…? * It works. Scientifically proven. Initiating transfer of "Positive Vibrations" Level: 500% xD Can feel something already - it really does work <3 Told ya! Lemme know when you get a free evening :* * I'll tell you later. Pros don't spill while on the job. Maybe over pizza and beer when its all over? * I'll let you know, but this one's lookin like a marathon. * You got it ;)

Got this thing… Hey, you ever hear of a case where someone disconnects from their wreath but gets stuck believin they're the person they were reliving in the BD? V, can't have this on my plate right now. Go to a ripper. What happened?? * Actually… nvm. It's nothin. False alarm Oooook, if you say so. But you know I'm here if any real alarm bells go off * So, hypothetically, say someone has trouble returning to their normal self after using a BD… that like a problem? Scale of 1 to 10 * Scratchin my head over here. New choom of mine had an accident recently. A localnet power surge overloaded his wreath and toasted the circuits. Guy's been livin his life thinking he's this BD star ever since * New choom of mine had an accident recently. A localnet power surge overloaded his wreath and toasted the circuits. Guy's been livin his life thinking he's this BD star ever since Sure, yeah, not unheard of. Could be a compulsive user, maybe a massive hardware failure… in my line of work we like to call it Dissociative Identity Defective 'Dance Onset. Or DIDDO for short If the condition doesn't sort itself out you need to use what we call the divided attention method. You show em one thing that's uniquely personal and another that represents the personality they've taken on. The resulting cognitive dissonance should snap em out of it (fingers crossed) Good thing you reached out. DIDDO can become permanent if you let it linger too long

You busy? Heeey, calabacita <3 What's goin on? How you been doin? * Hey, not bad. Same old stuff "Not bad" means "good" in my book! Which is great, cause I was thinkin… * Could be better. Been too long since we saw each other :( Oh no! My poor V, gazing out the window, pining after me! We gotta do somethin about that ;) * Yeah, fine. Johnny says hi Oh wow… didn't know Johnny was even aware I exist :P So anyway, why am I writing to you… Maybe I could come over to your place? * Of course!! Know my address in megabuilding H10? I think so… worst case I just ask a neighbor XD * Definitely! Know my apartment in Northside? Course I do. Watson's my home turf, you gonkbrain :P * For sure! Come to my pad in Japantown <3 Will do, just hope no tygers pounce on me XD * Preem idea! I'll be waiting at my apartment in the Glen! Ooh, the Glen? Swankyyy. Can't wait :-* * Yeah! Come on by my Corpo Plaza setup, y'know, downtown Hot damn, ok! Hope I won't be too underdressed XD * I thought you'd never ask :P I'm in Dogtown! Uhh… Dogtown? Seriously? Think I'll pass. Can we meet somewhere else? See you soon!!

Hola, V :D I've missed you. Can I come see you soon? Hey there :) Can I get another invite to your place? Hey hey <3 Y'know, got a little free time… Wanna meet up? Whaddaya say… Me? Your place? ASAP? * You have to ask?? Swing by my megabuilding apartment! Omw! * 1000%! Let's chill in Northside :) Be there in a millisec! * You. Me. Japantown. Now. Oh hell yeah! * Call your cab now and meet me in the Glen! * Umm, obviously. ;) Meet me at my Corpo Plaza place * If you wanna come to Dogtown…? It's not that I don't want to… I'm just terrified for my life is all. Maybe come back to NC to see me? * Sorry, but now's not a great time. Don't be mad, I'll see you soon, k? :) Oh c'mon, I ain't mad! But I'll hold you to that ;) * Mhm, calabacita… bet you know what I'm thinkin :P

I loved seeing you. Seriously. Thanks for finding some time for me. Gimme a holler when you find some more <3 * Thank YOU for being there for me :) Oh c'mon, stop bein so damn perfect all the time ;) * You know I will, prolly sooner than you think ;) Already got a countdown started :P * HOLLER Haha! Got me blushin so hard it feels like my cheeks are on fire Kisses, hugs and snugs! xoxo

Hey Jude :) Interested in hangin out? Ok, I'm all yours! Maybe I can come over? Can't just this sec, calabacita. Sorry :( I'll let you know soon tho when I'm free! You're the best! Whoa, V! Thanks for the preem ride! Where are we headed? And when?? Will we even fit inside?! Hahaha * Haha, who knows where the road will lead us! <3 * So you like it?? Phew… :D xoxo Thanks, V! This bouquet meant to symbolize our love? Y'know, lasts forever, non-biodegradable, that sorta thing? ;) Aaand you might just be the first person to ever compliment my calves… * It's criminal I don't compliment them more :-* Ok… haha, thanks for preem gift, V :) * And that's plain unacceptable! you ain't wrong there :P

Got a sec? * Hey Judy, doin swell, thanks for askin Sorry… just been shit day. Feels like nothing's going right. * No need to be sorry, was just messin with you * Maybe I can help with that, get your day back on track Where do ya wanna meet? * Sure do I'm at Lizzie's Talk to Mateo when you get here. I'll come up and join you. Roger that, see ya soon * Something wrong? No, why would you think that? Can name a few reasons First off, no enthusiastic "Hey calabacita!". Second, not one :) or ;) to be seen Third, it's rarely just one message and done with you. When Judy texts, my screen blows up in blue lolol xoxo ;) Oh V, don't you know just how to put a smile on my face :) * Dunno, just don't sound like yourself

Hey calabacita :P Thanks for a great night. Hell, thanks for everything you do. I really needed that, V. And I know you could see it… Prolly know me better than I know myself Let's do it again sometime, yeah? Sooner rather than later I hope :) * Anytime! * Can't take all the credit. Had preem time myself. Hard not to when you're around :) Just gimme a buzz when you get the time and the urge again Oh I will. But first… gotta shake this hangover… XD

Heeey, I've missed you! Interest you in a drink or a dance? Hopefully both? Hey hey <3 I ever tell you how fine you are? Whaddaya say, wanna make this city our bitch tonight? Psst… been thinkin about me lately? Cuz you're all I got on my mind ;) I'm free tonight… You? Wanna blow off some steam. Think you can help me with that? * You even have to ask?? Where we startin tonight? Meet me at Lizzie's! Just let Matteo know when you show and he'll ping me! * You know I can't say no to you. ;) Same as last time? Hell yeah! C u at Lizzie's!

A short trip came up Hey, got somethin of a short trip comin up. Won't be in town for a bit. A month max Seriously? :( well, shit, miss you already * But think how happy you'll be once I'm back ;) True, guess that helps… a little :P * The time's gonna fly by, then you'll get to see the new me Like, literally What's that supposed to mean? Fill ya in when I'm back in town. For now, gotta go.

Pick up! C'mon pick up Hellooooooooo Pick up, pleeease V? Hello? Please just pick up! Wanna go somewhere? Yo, V, you ok? Been a sec since I got a buzz from you Got some time on my hands and thought maybe you'd wanna meet up? There's this preem lookin exhibit on 20th century tech. Prolly the only chance in our lives to lay eyes on a VCR :P There's that, plus someone kinda misses you… ;) Helloooo? Can you answer please? Even one word? Got me worryin V? Said you'd be gone a month and it's already been, what, four?… What's goin on, V? Why didn't I ask where you were goin… Said you'd come back 21 missed calls from Judy Alvarez

[goatcheesecak3]

I hate you too Pt.3

Adam Faulkner-Stanheight x reader

Warnings: alcohol, brief mentions of nsfw

Fic type: angst, fluff

Summary: both trying to wrap your heads around the situation, you and Adam each reach out to your friends.

A/n: hello!! Probably the last part to this short series, I've had fun writing it though! Maybe I'll try a Lawrence fic next??? Who knows. Anyways, enjoy! :^)

Your heart sank. What the hell kind of sick game was Adam playing with you? Hooking up was one thing, but you'd both poured your hearts out to eachother, you though you had a real connection. You wiped tears from your eyes and gritted your teeth in anger. You needed a friend, a distraction. You called Mark.

"H- hey Mark" you spoke into the phone, sniffling a little and hoping it didn't sound like you'd been crying.

"What's up, y/n?" His voice sounded cheery.

"Look, I don't wanna put you on the spot or anything, man, but I uh... I'm having kinda a bad day, I was wondering if I could come over?"

"Hey, you know you're welcome anytime. Scott's coming over later to watch this lame slasher movie I picked up, it's gonna be a hoot. You should join us!"

His kindness was so jarring I'm contrast to the cold, unfeeling text you'd just recieved from Adam. It almost made you tear up again, but you held it together long enough to set a time, before hanging the phone up.

You made yourself a rather exquisite breakfast consisting of a cigarette, a beer, and several more cigarettes. Following this, you drifted in and out of sleep on the couch while watching episodes of beavis and butthead, and trying your hardest not to think about Adam.

When 6pm rolled around, you finally got yourself dressed and headed out to Mark's apartment.

...

After sending you that awful text, Adam had fallen asleep for a few hours. When he awoke, it was the evening. Despite a full day's rest, he didn't feel any better, in fact, he felt much worse. He knew he'd fucked up, he'd let himself step too far and now he was pretty sure your entire friendship was out the window, let alone any chance at a relationship. He knew deep down this was for the best, or at least he thought so? His head was swimming and he really couldn't make much sense of the whole situation. He had to bite the bullet, and call in for reinforcements in the form of his friend Scott. Adam knew full well that revealing the events that had transpired to Scott would come with a barrage of jokes and teasing, but at the end of it all, Scott was his friend and he'd help him make sense of it all.

...

"Yeah, I can meet you bro. I'm going to Mark's to watch this lame movie, I'll come pick you up and we can talk on the way. We're long overdue for a guy's night"

"Thanks, Man. Yeah, a guy's night sounds good"

Adam was beyond relieved that it would just be the three of them, he couldn't bear to face you right now.

At half six, Scott's beat up old Ford pulled up outside Adam's building, to find him already waiting on the curb, a cigarette hanging from his lips.

"You got one of them for me?" Scott grinned as Adam climbed in.

"Always" Adam obliged, handing Scott a cigarette.

"So," Scott pulled off with a screech, "What did you wanna talk about?"

"It's about y/n"

"What, you hittin that or something?" Scott teased.

Adam's unexpected silence answered that question, as he shifted awkwardly in his seat.

"No. Way. No fuckin WAY dude. Mark totally owes me 50 bucks" Scott gave Adam an affectionate punch in the arm, briefly averting his gaze from the road to see what he expected to be a smug grin plastered across Adam's face. Instead, however, Adam's face told a story of guilt and confliction.

"What? You didn't her pregnant did you?" He sounded genuinely concerned.

"Nah man, nothing like that. It's just... ugh, I don't know, I think I like her? But like, I'd just break her heart if I went there" Adam stared straight ahead as he spoke.

"You don't know that, man just tell her how you feel. At the very least you'll get to see her naked a couple more times before you completely fuck it up." It seemed that Scott possessed the incredible ability to never take anything seriously.

"Yeah... I don't think i can do that. Like, I think I've pretty much nailed that coffin shut"

"Well you certainly nailed something," Scott held out his fist to Adam and grinned to himself.

"Dude, I'm serious"

"So am I! Dude, emotional bullshit aside, y/n's a fuckin smokeshow, and I'm proud of my boy for his achievements"

Adam bit the insides of his cheeks, but couldn't help the smile from creeping across his face. He knew the whole macho bullshit thing was gross and childish, but admittedly, he was kinda proud of himself for sleeping with you. He bumped Scott's fist.

"There he is" Scott chuckled, "so, now that we've got all this acting like a pussy out the way, you're gonna pick up your phone, call y/n and tell her 'I'll be at your place later with condoms and viagra, chug a couple energy drinks 'cause we're gonna go all night'" he joked.

"You know, I think that approach might be a little full on" Adam laughed. "But you're right, I gotta stop being a little bitch about this and tell her how I feel"

"Awesome. Me and Mark can help you plan how you're gonna do it tonight, but you owe us another guy's night if we do"

"How come?"

"Because you're totally acting like a chick"

"Shut up, man. You're an asshole, you know that?"

...

You'd been at Mark's apartment for a little while already, drinking beer and waiting for Scott to arrive.

"Does he know I'm gonna be here?" You asked casually

"You know, totally slipped my mind to tell him. Hell be here any minute, so I guess he'll find out when he arrives" Mark smiled.

As if to punctuate that sentence, the unmistakable sound of Scott's loud footsteps approached the apartment door, followed by a hefty knock.

Mark opened the door, to see both Scott and Adam waiting.

"Oh hey! Guess the whole gang's here" Mark smiled.

The two men entered the apartment, Adam's expression slowly turning to one of dread when he saw you sat on the couch.

"What the hell is he doing here?!"

"What the hell is she doing here?!" The pair of you exclaimed at the same time.

"Oh come on, not this again. Guys, just sit down, relax, have a few beers. I'm too tired to watch you two fight all night" Mark rolled his eyes.

"Won't be necessary" you said coldly, rising to your feet and attempting to barge your way past the men and out of the apartment.

"Ohhhh I don't think so, little lady" Scott scoffed, blocking your exit.

"Scott, I'm warning you, you know I could kick your ass" you bit.

"Be that as it may, you and Adam got a lot to talk about. Now Mark and I are gonna leave for a while, give you two some privacy, and you're gonna solve this" Scott said. Seeing Scott be the voice of reason was like seeing a unicorn, you couldn't believe your eyes.

"Why should I leave? This is my apartment?" Mark argued as Scott ushered him out

"Because you're gonna head down to the ATM and withdraw that 50 bucks you owe me"

"What?" The realisation set in and he turned to face you and Adam, "you two? No WAY!"

"Have funnnnn" Scott mocked in a sing-song voice as he guided a gobsmacked Mark out of the apartment, closing the door behind them on their way out.

The apartment was silent now, you and Adam both stood, stunned, staring blankly at eachother. You would have kept this stand off going on forever, if you weren't so drained. You threw yourself down onto the couch and sighed exasperatedly.

"This is so fucking humiliating" you muttered under your breath.

Adam sat beside you. You held your head in your hands, eyes glued to the floor, but you could feel Adam's gaze burning into you.

"Y/n, I-"

"No, it's fine, like I get it. Last night was a mistake, it didn't mean anything. You don't have to tell me again." You snapped, not wanting to relive the heartbreak.

Adam exhaled

"I didn't mean that" he said quietly, his voice sounding shameful.

Suddenly, something inside you snapped. You were furious, he'd completely devasted you, and now he'd changed his mind?

"Then what the fuck do you mean?!" You blurted angrily, "you hate me one minute, you like me the next. What the actual fuck is your problem, Adam? What is it you want? Because in case you hadn't realised, you've given me some pretty mixed signals in the last 24 hours!"

"I want you!" He yelled "I mean.. I want to be able to want you" his voice was soft, gentle even.

Yours was not.

"Oh my fucking GOD. Do you only talk in riddles or something? What next, do I need to solve a fucking treasure hunt to find your missing brain?!"

"Y/n, no, please just listen.. okay? I just- man I thought I'd have time to plan this" he exclaimed to himself, throwing his arms up in the air.

"Look, if I don't get a straight answer in the next five minutes I'm walking out that door" you said, calmer now.

"Okay.. okay.." Adam breathed slowly, he seemed to be trying to find the words.

"Look," he began, "I'm in the weirdest place emotionally right now, I've always struggled with being vulnerable, but I mean, I'm so much worse these days. Ever since... well, you know..." he bit the inside of his lip and looked ahead, his eyes filled with sadness.

"I'm still trying to get myself back, and I don't know if the part of me that can let people in is ready.

If I let you in right now, I'm scared that I'll only hurt you further down the line, and I could never ask you to just wait around for me to get better."

He stared at the floor and sighed, feeling quite sorry for himself.

You considered what he had said for a moment, before finally speaking, much gentler this time.

"So get better now"

"What? Y/n, it's mot that simple"

"Yes, Adam, it is that simple" you said, your tone kind, but firm. "You say you're trying to get better at letting people in, and in the last 24 hours you've been more emotionally honest with your arch nemesis than you would ever imagine. Sure, it doesn't exactly scream stability, but that's part of the process. You're making progress" you took Adam's hand and brushed your thumb across his skin reassuringly.

"It's not gonna be easy, but if you don't take this chance and let me in then you're not moving forward".

Adam let out a half hearted chuckle, and wiped a few tears he hoped you hadn't seen from his eyes.

"I hate the fact that you're always right"

"Get used to it" you smiled warmly, giving him a playful nudge.

"Okay... so in the spirit of moving forward" he gulped, "would you uhh... be free for date sometime?"

He smiled sheepishly, nervously fidgeting with the sleeve of his jacket. You noticed that his eyes seemed to look extra sparkly, as if there was hope and excitement in them for the first time in a while.

"I'm free right now" you giggled, placing your hand on Adam's cheek and leaning in to kiss him.

Adam's hands held onto your waist as he leaned into the kiss, gradually pushing you back onto the sofa. He kissed you deeper now, more hungrily, his fingertips were just brimming the hem of your shirt, when...

"Aaaand the two of you can go continue that "date" literally anywhere but my sofa" Mark exclaimed, bursting into the apartment, Scott following giggling like a schoolboy.

"Were you assholes listening through the door?!" You squealed, jumping up and adjusting your shirt.

"Hey, I didn't wanna, but Mark needed proof that he lost the bet!" Scott laughed, barely able to contain himself.

"Dude! Come on, that was priv- wait.. what bet?" You asked, more curious than annoyed by this point.

"I bet Mark that you and Adam secretly liked eachother, and now I'm 50 bucks richer" Scott said proudly.

"Never would've imagined you guys together" Mark admitted, "but you know what, I like this little dynamic. It's sweet, or at least it is when you're not tryna bang on my couch" he teased.

"Sorry about that, man" Adam chuckled, his cheeks reddening.

"Now, come on you crazy kids," Scott said, in a slightly patronising, but good natured tone, "get your asses down to some restaurant or something where you can sit and make googly eyes at eachother before me and Mark throw up"

...

You and Adam walked down the street after leaving Mark's apartment. Your hands brushed against eachother, and without words they were interlinked. Just to think, a couple days ago you would have thrown up at the thought of holding Adam's hand, but now it was all you wanted to do.

"So... a restaurant, huh?" Adam said, swinging your arms slightly.

"Hm" you tilted your head, "orrrrr... we could head back to mine, crack open a bottle of wine on the balcony... maybe fool around a little?" You looked at Adam with a cheeky grin.

"God, you just get me" Adam laughed, placing his free hand on your waist and planting a soft kiss onto your lips.

And it was indeed, a perfect date.

[rvzcvx]

hello!! how are you? i hope it won't be difficult for you to write what i ask, but if it's problematic, just ignore it!

let it be a smut with dom Bill and sub reader, where they are each other's best Internet friends, because Bill is always on trains to concerts. when Bill and the reader arrange for the reader to come to his concert, when Tokio Hotel finally turns up in the city where the reader lives, after the concert, Bill and the reader must meet for the first time, since they had not seen each other live before. when the concert ends and they finally meet, Bill takes the reader to his dressing room, from where all the other band members have already left, and Bill has to wash off his makeup, which he asks the reader to help with, sitting her on his lap, which is why she is so embarrassed, but helps Bill. while taking off his makeup, Bill stares at her lips, and when the makeup is done, he kisses her, and it all turns into a smut.

i hope it doesn't look so bad and is feasible. good luck with that, even if you don't write what i asked for, but something else! have a nice day ;)

i believe in you! <3

ONLINE FRIENDS

pairing: bill x female reader

warnings: smut, dom!bill, sub!reader, kissing, head (fem!receiving), p in v

a/n: i love your request!! i hope youre gonna have a good day too!! i really enjoyed writing this!! you guys can send more requests, i will write them as fast as i can!!

For some time now, I have been texting online with a boy named Bill. He told me a lot about himself and his band, but we never met because he rarely visited the city where i lived.

Currently, I was sitting on my bed and scrolling through Instagram when someone started calling me. When I noticed it was Bill, I answered immediately.

"Hey Bill, what's up?" I asked. “Hey y/n, I wanted to tell you that my band will be having a concert in your city soon!” Bill said. You could hear in his voice that he was smiling.

"Oh my god, really?!" I screamed with excitement and almost started jumping around the room with happiness. "Really! I got you tickets, you'll be in the front row!" Bill said. "Thank you Bill, you are the best! I can't wait to see you!" I said with a big smile on my face.

"I can't wait to see you too!" Bill added. We talked for another half hour until Bill had to end because he had band rehearsals.

Time skip to the day of the concert.

Today is the day I will see the Tokio hotel in real life! I put on a black top, a short denim skirt, white heels and took a silver bag in which I put all the most important things.

I texted Bill that I couldn't wait to see him and left the house and got into a taxi. I gave the driver the address and after 20 minutes I arrived at my destination.

Since I had early access to the entrance, I could skip the entire queue and enter as one of the first to occupy the first row.

After half an hour, there was a crowd here. The concert hall accommodated as many as 50,000 people. As I looked around this huge venue, I didn't notice that the band had finally taken the stage.

Together with other fans, I started screaming and waving at the boys. I made eye contact with Bill and we smiled at each other, and in a moment the first song, durch den monsun, could be heard.

Time skip after the concert.

The concert was wonderful, I sang all the songs and I was very excited to see my online friend.

Finally, when the band left the stage, everyone started to get ready to leave, including me. As I reached the exit, a security guard approached me. "Bill Kaulitz asked you to go backstage, please follow me" The man said and started leading me somewhere where fans wouldn't have access.

We walked through long corridors until we finally stopped in front of a room where another security guard stood and let me in. Bill was sitting on the couch in the room.

When I saw him, I immediately approached him. "God Bill, you're even taller in real life than in the photos" I said and looked up at him, hugging him. "And you're even shorter." He laughed and patted me on the back.

"I have to take off my makeup and then we can go to the hotel. The boys have already gone anyway" He announced and sat down at the table with a mirror. "I can help you if you want" I said and smiled, standing behind him.

"Of course. It will be faster if you help me" Bill replied and smiled too, patting his knee, which probably meant that I should sit on it.

I blushed, but I didn't refuse and I sat on his knee, taking a cotton pad in my hand and starting to remove his makeup. I felt his eyes on my lips the whole time, but I didn't say anything.

When I finished, I smiled. "And it's done" I said, but I felt Bill's hand on my waist as he pulled me closer and kissed me.

At first, I was surprised and didn't know what to do, but after a while I kissed him back and placed my hands on his shoulders.

Bill placed his hands on my buttocks and lifted me up from the chair and placed my back against the table behind us as he continued to kiss me.

He started kissing me lower until he crouched down in front of me. "May I?" He asked, pointing to my skirt. I nodded yes and soon I heard the sound of my skirt falling down.

Bill pulled aside my already wet pink panties and buried his head in my folds. "Ahhh, Bill!" I screamed, grabbing his hair and pinning my legs on either side of his head.

"Fuck, you're so wet for me" He said, plunging his tongue into me. When I felt his cold piercing, I moaned loudly. "Bill, I can't, oh" I gasped, grabbing his hair in pleasure.

Bill continued, holding my thigh with one hand and rubbing circles on my clit with the other. Finally I felt a knot forming in my stomach and I cummed on his tongue. "Ahh, I'm cumming!" I moaned.

Bill just smiled and stood up, kissing me again. I felt his tongue, which still had some of my juices on it, and smiled into his lips.

"It's not over yet" He said and started to unbuckle his belt. I smiled and helped him take off his pants, steadying myself on the table with one hand.

He pulled down his pants along with his boxers and that's when I saw how big he was. My eyes widened and I swallowed. Bill pulled a small bottle of lube from his bag and spread it over his length.

After a while I felt him at my entrance. Bill grabbed my hips and kissed me. "Are you ready?" He asked. "Yes please" I said and grabbed his back, impaling myself on his cock.

We both moaned at the same time and Bill started moving. "You're so tight, god" He said. "Don't stop!" I said, feeling tears come to my eyes.

He quickened his pace, gripping my hips tightly and placing soft kisses on my neck. "Fuck Bill!" I screamed, digging my nails into his back and clenching my pussy around his cock.

"I'm about to cum" Bill panted, lowering his head to my shoulder. "Me too, oh my god" I moaned and felt that knot forming in my stomach again.

Bill pushed a few more times and finally he came inside me, and a moment later I came, with a loud moan. My tears fell onto his shirt and my nails dug into his back, leaving red marks on it.

We both put our clothes back on and then cleaned up the mess we had left. "We can go back to the hotel now" Bill said and kissed me.

[whoisneo404]

Can you do one where y/n is secretly gay and had the hugest crush on nick since he was 7 but never actually acted on it but y/n gets tried of pretending to be straight so he breaks up with his girlfriend and then goes sees nick crying and ends up telling him he's gay (you can add smut if you'll like.)

Start Over. (part 1)

Summary: You break up with your girlfriend after behing tired of hiding your feelings for Nick.

Tw: cursing, a bit of anxiety.

Note: Nicks texts are purple and yours are blue.

I look at my phone as it rings, a message from Nick pop ups in my phone, the background of him and me in the beach playing in the water lights up. Lila always told me to change it to a picture of her but I always brush it off telling her that it was a special memory.

I tap on it and when the chat opens a picture of the both of us playing on a park in Boston pops up, we are maybe 7 or 8 years old. I smile at my phone and a little message appears.

>You were soooooooo cute, what happened to you?

I feel my cheeks burn a bit and I type back.

>I got even cuter, can’t say the same about you.

I send it and I can picture his grin and his eyes rolling. I miss him, when I feel the acrylic nails dig into my shoulder I remember where I was.

"Are you paying attention?" Lila asks and I look at her, suddenly I remember where I was, the sound of the football match blasting on the TV, our 'friends' screaming and chanting at their teams. I feel my body grow tense.

"No. I-... I need to get some air." I get up but her hands are still on my body.

"Want me to go with you?" she asks.

"Not really, I’ll be back quickly." I try to not make kt a big of a deal as I walk outside the house, I sit on the porch and let out a sigh as I bury my face on my hands. "Shit." I mumble to myself.

My phone rings again. I grab it.

>Whatever loser.

>How is the game going? Is your team losing? I hope it is.

I smile again, my heart flutters and I try to swallow my feelings. Because I shouldn’t feel this way about my best friend, I shouldn’t feel this way when I have a girlfriend, I shouldn’t feel this when I like girls... Or do I? I have never really looked at Lila the way the guys on the movies we watch look at the girls, I never get the urge to kiss or cuddle her. I like her company, she's a great friend, and I’m sure most people would think she is an amazing girlfriend but I just don't feel the same. Do I not like her? No, I don't.

Shit.

Fuck.

I hate this.

>Hey, Nick. Call me, please.

>Everything okay?

>No.

>Code Sink??

>Yeah....

>Kay, I’ll call you in 3 minutes. Make sure everyone hears that you have to go.

>Thanks.

I take another deep breath. I stand up and walk inside, everyone was still screaming and laughing, I sit back on my spot, Lila asks me something and I only nod, my palms sweat, my head feels dizzy. Nick, get me out, please, get me out. The sweet perfume of Lila hits my face as she leans on my shoulder, I try to not move, I pat her head and she smiles. I feel bad, I like you but not like you like me.

My phone buzzes, I pick it up and a few friends look over at me.

"What? He is sick?... okay I’ll be there. Yeah, don’t worry, I'll buy that. Hm... No, it’s okay. Bye, Dad." Nick talks quietly on the other side. He tells me what to say and I repeat it. I feel Lila squeeze my arms as I speak. I put my phone down.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah... I mean, my cat ate something bad and puked, my dad is worried. So, I better go check on them."

"Oh no. Poor kitty, I hope he is fine." She kisses my cheek. "Go, text me." I kiss and kiss her forehead; I stand up and say a quick goodbye to everyone. I walk outside and when I close the door behind me, I feel my world crumbling.

What would he think of me? What would he say? Will he hate me? Will she hate me? Will they be disappointed?

Fuck.

I call Nick. It rings twice and he picks up.

"Hey, everything okay? why did you called sink?" Nicks voice sounds worried and sincere, it calms me down.

"I just felt overwhelmed." He hums. "Talk to me while I walk home." I say as start walking on the cold night.

"Okay. So, today we took a few pictures for Instagram, I was going to send them to you so you can pick which one I upload but you were busy with your friends and-..."

"Never busy for you. You could have just texted me."

"Whatever."

"Don't roll your eyes at me." I chuckle.

"HOW DO YOU-? you are spying on me, you creep." I can tell he is smiling.

"No, I just know you too well. Keep going."

"Whatever. I haven’t posted them yet, so you can choose. We also bought these gross gummies of different flavors; we will try them on our next video but I also want you to try them."

"Hell no."

"Please, it will be fun. Plus, Ill invite you to sleepover."

"I can just invite myself; I know you don’t mind." I see the building of my apartment; I sit on the front stairs because I don’t want him to hear that I have arrived. I don't want to end the call.

Nick and I talk for a good time. I know he knows I’m home; he isn’t stupid.

"Would you still be my friend if I told you I kind of don’t like Lila...?" I drop suddenly.

"What?... WHAT?" I feel my eyes water. "Shit, that came out wrong. Of course, I’ll still be your friend but why would you say that??"

"Nick... I, shit, Can I go to your house tomorrow? I’ll talk to you then." I hang up and rush to my room. I hear my phone ringing and buzzing but I don’t pick up. I turn it off. I throw myself in my bed and cry.

Guilt and shame fill my heart. I feel sorry for Lila, I feel sorry for myself, I am afraid to lose him. Eventually I fall asleep.

Friday morning, I get ready to go to uni. The day is heavy, my mind filled with thoughts and my heart rushing. By the end of my day, I walk to the outside of campus when I feel two small arms around mine. Lila...

"Where have you been? I have been searching for you all day." I see her friends behind us. I gulp and look down at her.

"Lila... can we talk?" Her eyes widen, maybe she knows what I will say.

"Of course, what happens?" Maybe it’s because she is the one initiating our kisses or cuddles, maybe it’s because I call her baby just because she asked me to. Or because my wallpaper is my best friend, but she knew, and something inside of me knows that she found out.

"I like a guy..." I whisper. Her grip on my arm tightens, her eyes water and mine do to. "I’m sorry, I really am."

"Don’t be..." her voice cracks.

"I hope we can still be friends and-..."

"Give me time. I hope it goes well for you." She turns around and walks away to her friends, they quickly hug her. her face hidden by her hands. They all look bad at me, I get it, I would have done the same. I have done the same, I also looked at myself with hate.

I walk away. I grab my phone and call Nick.

"Jesus, I was so scared. What happened?"

"I broke up with Lila..."

"Oh shit... I- Are you okay? Where are you?" I hear him walking and opening a door.

"Walking to your house. Are your brothers there."

"No, they left. I’m here, I’ll wait for you on the porch."

"Kay, thanks. I’ll be there."

I walk to his house, it’s a bit far. But it gives me time to breath, hold back my tears and swallow my anxiety.

I hope he doesn't hate me...

Taglist: @freshloveforthefit @shywolfapricotfan @sturnphilia @matty-bear @thenickgirl @stvrniolvsp @paige05 @soursturniolo @miloisdone1 @teenagetrash00 @lovely-calypso @h3arts4harry @malirosee

[l0v3-stay]

THAT’S HOW WE MET

A Park Sunghoon ff.

Word count: 15k words

Chapters: 1 (2.5k words) 2 (2.7k words) 3 (2.9k words) 4 (2.7k words) 5 (2k words) 6 (2.1k words) 7 (13 words)

Pairing: Sunghoon x Reader

Tags/Warnings: Fluff, No smut, Suggestive, Lots of kissing, Neck kissing, Suggested pregnancy, fireworks, Sunghoon and reader just love each other too much ;) Lmk if I missed anything!!

A/N: Hellooooooo! Hope you'll like this story!! The pics of the chats are mine, but all the others aren't!! Credits to their respective owners!!

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱ Find me on AO3: L0V3_STAY

ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎ Find me on WATTPAD: l0v3_stay

₍⑅ᐢ..ᐢ₎ Comments, Feedback and requests are highly appreciated!! <3

ㅤ/ᐠ - ˕ -マ Have fun reading and take care <3

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 1

“    “One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight…” These were the only words echoing in my head as my feet moved to the rhythm of the music. The CEO’s eyes pointed towards me as he carefully watched my every move, not missing out anything, not even how many times I blinked or breathed. Everyone was watching me, the choreographer, the lyricist, the producer, the CEO… All of their eyes pierced holes onto my skin as I tried not to let anxiety get to me. The music ended along with my dance as I posed, imagining I was an Idol already. Everyone clapped as I bowed elegantly, trying to look as confident as possible, as if I wasn’t being eaten from the inside out by my anxiety and uncertainty about the future and my performance. 

“You can leave.” The CEO spoke coldly, so cold I thought he was mad about something I didn’t even know. Maybe my performance wasn’t good enough? Maybe I should’ve put more effort into my moves? I should’ve been more expressive? I don’t know, I won’t know until a few months later when the results will come out. For now, thinking about it and having anxiety attacks is useless, it will just make everything even worse. 

I walked out of the structure slowly, my hands slightly shaking as if they were leaves being moved by the wind. I slowly made my way to a nearby cafe, one of my favorite cafes in the area and sat at a table near the window in the corner. My phone started vibrating inside my pocket, it was my best friend, Mina, calling me. I answered.

“How did the audition go, girly?”

Her voice made me feel like a kid receiving a candy, my heart melting like ice cream at the thought of having such an amazing friend. A friend like Mina was everything I had wished for when I was a kid. We’ve been friends since childhood and I still remember every detail of the moment I met her. We were at a friend’s pajama party and she had invited both of us. I was scared to go due to my sleep problems, but Mina was there to help with them even if we had just met. She sometimes sends me texts to remind me to take my melatonin and charge my speaker for the nights in which I turn on soft background songs to help me fall asleep. I get snapped back to reality as soon as I hear Mina’s voice through the phone again, this time sounding worried, probably scared about the fact that my audition might have gone the wrong way.

“Are you there, girl?” She asks, I know she’s fidgeting with something on the other side of the phone.

“Yeah, sorry” I pause for a second before speaking again, my voice reassuring “The audition went well, I think. The CEO sounded scary when he told me I could leave, even if I don’t know if he was mad about something. But hey, even if the results of my audition won’t be the ones we are hoping for, it was worth trying!” I say, trying to cheer her up, even if my nervousness was evident in my voice even through the call. 

The rest was all small talk as Mina tried to distract me by talking about her new house in japan, about her new university and her part-time job as a babysitter during the weekends. She told me about one of the kids she babysitted in particular, Jihyoung, a korean child that had recently moved to japan. She told me how his favorite group was Enhypen too, just like me, and how he wished to become an idol when he was older. Mina also described his reaction when she told him that I was auditioning under the same company as Enhypen, it was hilarious. 

A sigh escaped my lips as we ended the call, finally being able to grab a coffee for myself to ease the tiredness caused by my sleepless nights. As the waiter approached me with the coffee in his hand, looking extremely good, I’m not going to lie, a small smile formed on my lips. I took the coffee happily, thanking the waiter with a polite bow while warming my hands against the hot paper cup, before leaving, making my way to an ice skating rink. 

I walked carefully in the huge crowd on the street, a soft breeze hitting my skin as I waited for the light to turn green to cross the road. My feet moved at the rhythm of an unknown tune in my head, the imaginary beat soft and slow, as if it should help ease my anxiety somehow. As I finally reach the ice skating rink, I notice a crowd of people all gathered around a van in front of the entrance of the structure. As I got closer, I noticed some members of the security asking me who I was and if I had the pass to enter the rink. I took out my wallet along with my pass that I had previously bought to be able to keep skating, even if my audition went wrong. They quickly moved to the side, letting me enter the structure without asking any more questions. 

As I made my way towards the changing rooms, I noticed that I was alone except for a male skater already warming up on the ice. I enter the changing rooms, changing in a simple white skirt and a sporty, black sleeveless top. My skates white and neat, soft, black le warmers resting perfectly on my legs as I make my way to the rink. 

As I made my way to the rink, I saw the male skater stopping and coming closer to my direction. I looked down just to notice a black, not too big, backpack on the floor, resting against the wall. I assumed it was his. As I look up again, his face is familiar. 

I stare at him as gets closer, looking at his face more closely.

Park Sunghoon.  THE Park Sunghoon.

I froze there in my place, staring at him with wide eyes. It’s like my mind went blank, not even realizing that he was now crouching right next to me, grabbing his water bottle from his backpack. 

“Hello” He speaks, his voice sounding a little confused as I was still staring right at him. He slowly stands up, drinking some water from his bottle, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down in the hottest way possible, making me feel like a cube of ice melting. 

“H-Hello” I answered, quickly averting my gaze as soon as I realized that I’ve been staring. I bow politely at him, regaining my composure.

“Seems like we’re alone here” He spoke with a slight chuckle, putting his bottle away, back into his backpack. “What’s your name?” 

“Oh, I’m Y/N, it’s a pleasure to meet you!” I said and gave him a soft smile. Talking to him was already becoming easier, even if a glint of nervousness was never leaving me. I was talking to my idol after all. 

“Y/N…” He repeated, clearly thinking “This name sounds so familiar” He said, and that’s when I felt anxiety quickly get to me.

“Oh, yeah… You’ve probably seen it on the posters with the people auditioning” My gaze was now directed towards the floor, my hand nervously scratching the back of my neck “I auditioned earlier, my dream is to become an Idol” I said again, trying my best to regain confidence. 

His eyes sparkled at my words, causing some faint blush to appear on my cheeks. I felt my ears heat up, making me even more nervous as I was now aware of my red face. 

“That’s amazing! Have you gotten the results already?” He asked excitedly, a wide smile on his face as he seemed interested in knowing more about me and my life, my dreams and my fears. 

I shook my head, hinting a silent “No”.  He pouted slightly, making a small smile form on my lips. “I’ll have the results in a couple days though, I think they’ll be announced on some posters in the building, too!” I spoke, trying to cheer him up. 

He nodded before speaking again, this time making my eyes widen a little. “If you want I can give you my number, you know, in case you need any help or advice” He gave me a kind smile while taking out his phone. I couldn’t help but notice his wallpaper with a picture of him and the rest of the members along with ENGENEs at a concert. A soft smile crept on my lips as I took out my phone too, handing it to him. He took it, his vampire-like teeth showing through his smile at the sight of a picture of me with my little sister and Mina as my wallpaper. I glanced at his hands as he inserted his number into my phone with a smile. He saved himself as “Sunghoonie ;)”, causing a soft chuckle to escape my lips. I put my phone back into my own bag after he put his number in it, thanking him with a smile and a slight bow before he spoke again.

“Who were those in your wallpaper?” Curiosity was evident in his voice as he smiled at me, sitting down on a small bench near the rink and patting the spot next to him, inviting me to sit down.

“The child sitting on my legs is my little sister” I said, a soft smile on my lips as I continued “She’s 7 years old” I added, chuckling slightly. 

“The other girl is Mina” I said, this time referring to the black-haired girl sitting next to me “She’s my best friend, I met her at a party when I was a kid” I looked over at him, who was now looking towards the floor but still carefully listened to my words.

“Oh, that’s good. Y’all are so pretty in that picture” He said, now facing me with a friendly smile. I felt my heart skip a beat and tried my best not to look like a tomato. I mumbled a quick “Thanks” before standing up, heading towards the rink. 

“Should we get to skating?” I ask with a soft smile, trying to sound as stable as possible even if my sanity was about to throw itself out of the window after his compliment. Was I dreaming?

He stood up, walking to the rink with me as we got started skating. We were doing our own skating routines without interrupting each other, and I was grateful for that, also because he looked effortlessly handsome while skating. 

I was attempting a new jump on the ice after warming up, but suddenly I don’t know what had gotten in me.

 I slipped and fell, 

the blade of my right skate hitting my left leg, leaving a bloody cut behind. 

Sunghoon rushed to me, checking my leg. I swear I saw worry in his eyes at that moment, making my chest ache in both concern and embarrassment due to my fall. 

“Wait, let me take you out of the rink…” He spoke, more to himself than to me, and picked me up. My heart was beating faster even through my pain, butterflies dancing in my stomach. He carried me out of the rink and put me down on the small bench where we were sitting earlier before he spoke again. 

“I’ll get something to medicate that, okay? Don’t move” He said before running into the changing rooms. I didn’t even notice him taking his skates off to not risk falling and hurting himself too. He came back shortly after with a medikit, taking out a bandage and slowly wrapping it around my leg after disinfecting it. His touch was gentle yet firm, making sure the bandage was wrapped tight enough to stop the bleeding. 

“Here” He spoke, sighing in relief “You scared me, you know?” He said, scolding me in a playful way. A smile appeared on my lips, it was genuine, I never felt so grateful before. We barely met and I was already comfortable with him. 

“Sorry” I said with a slight laugh “Thanks though, I don’t know what I would’ve done if I were alone” I looked down, with an almost invisible smile before looking back up at him. “I guess no more skating for me today” I laughed at my statement, noticing a small smile appear on his lips too. It all felt like a dream, my leg hurt, but the rest of my emotions were covering the pain. The happiness, the nervousness, the gratefulness, the excitement, the adrenaline were covering everything. 

“No more skating for me either” He said, sitting down next to me “I’m done with my routine and one of my friends wanted to play games with me at 7” He said, pointing to the time on his phone. It was 6.30pm. 

I nodded, giving him a smile and slowly standing up, my leg hurting a bit. I was about to thank him and say bye but he cut me off. 

“How are you going home?” He stood up too after putting his shoes on. 

“On foot” I said, slightly confused. Why did that matter? Was he asking to make sure my leg was gonna be okay during the trip home?

“Oh no, you’re NOT going home on foot with that leg” He pointed at my bandage-covered leg, emphasizing the word “Not”.  “I’ll take you home” He spoke, offering me his arm to help me walk. I tried telling him it wasn’t a problem at all, that my leg hurt just a bit and was nothing serious, but he insisted for me to go home with him. 

We both got on the van, his bodyguards eyeing me along with the fans waiting for him outside. He made sure I got into the van without being pushed or hurt by the fans screaming and trying to be noticed by him. As we got in, he gave me a slight smile and in 10 minutes we were in front of my dorm’s door. 

“Is this your dorm?” He asked, pointing towards my door. I nodded in response and he hummed before pointing at a door not far from mine “You know, that’s Sunoo’s room” My mouth fell open at his statement. One of my idols was literally 2 doors away from mine and I didn’t know? He chuckled at my reaction before glancing at the time on his phone. 

“I guess I should go, I’ll let you be surprised by yourself” His words caused a laugh to escape my mouth and soft blush to creep on my cheeks.

“Wait” I said hurriedly “Thank you, Sunghoon” I gave him a grateful smile, and he smiled brightly in return. 

“No problem” He said, pointing at his phone and hinting a silent “Call me if you need anything.

My heart thumped loudly in my chest as I plopped myself on my bed, exhausted from the long day I just lived. A long, but definitely amazing, day.

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CHAPTER 2

“ I woke up to the sound of Given-Taken, the song I selected as my alarm before auditioning. My eyelids were heavy and my leg still hurt, but much less than yesterday. I slowly sat up, my hair messy and my back hurting a little from when I fell the previous day. I checked the time on my phone, it was 8am. My eyes traveled lower, where I noticed a notification by “Sunghoonie ;)”. I opened it, revealing a message that made me smile like an idiot. Was he always this sweet and caring?  

I answered with a quick “Yup :3”  before putting my phone down, kicking my feet with a red face and a wide smile on my face. Am I dreaming? No, this is all real. 

I stood up lazily, making my way towards the small bathroom, washing my face and doing my skincare (Gurl’s looking fresh y’all) and heading back to my bedroom. I quickly got dressed, wearing some comfy clothes since I’ll be off to practice soon. I took a note in my mind to remember that I have to check the posters on my way, just to see if I got lucky and my audition’s result is already there 

I ate an apple in the fastest way possible before rushing out of my dorm, and running towards the practice rooms. I even took the stairs so I didn’t have to wait for the elevator. I passed in front of a free practice room and left my water bottle there before making my way towards the posters in the main area of the building, my anxiety rising at each step. The sound of my shoes against the floor reminded me of bullets and the pain I would feel if I didn’t get accepted, making an unpleasant shiver run down my spine. As I saw the posters in front of me, I took a deep breath before looking for my name with shaky hands clung to my sweatpants. 

Here it is,

No results yet. 

I cursed under my breath, my heart pounding in my chest so loud that I thought even Mina would hear it from Japan. I made my way back to the practice room I saw earlier, but to my surprise it was now closed. I knocked on the door, hoping that it was just the wind or my memory playing tricks on me and I was the one who had closed the door. I already met Sunghoon yesterday, I’m not ready to meet other of my Idols yet. 

I heard a faint “Come in” coming from inside the practice room and I slowly opened the door.

Please tell me it’s not an Idol,

Please tell me it’s not an Idol,

Please tell me it’s not an Idol,

Please, please, please, please,

…

It was an Idol.

Jungwon stood right in front of me, his phone in his hand, probably selecting the song he needs to practice. 

“Sorry, I think I forgot my water bottle here earlier” I spoke, trying to control my shaky hands. It’s not my lucky day, is it?

“Oh, do you need help finding it?” He asked, his cat-like eyes now looking directly at me making me feel uneasy. I shook my head slightly and went over to the corner where I had previously left my bottle before speaking “Here it is” I held my bottle up, showing it to him with a smile.

He smiled back at me, walking a little closer “I never saw you around” He said curiously, indirecting asking me who I was. 

“Oh, well, my name is Y/N. I auditioned yesterday” I said, and he looked at me making a conscious “Ahh” sound. “

“So you are the famous Y/N Sunghoon couldn’t stop talking about” I felt my heart drop at his words, but in a good way. Did I really leave such an impression on Sunghoon? Damn. I didn’t know how to respond, I was curious about what Sunghoon had said about me, but at the same time I didn't want to seem too interested or invasive. 

Luckily, Jungwon interrupted my thoughts by satisfying my curiosity without me having to ask. “He said you are a really nice skater and that you’re really pretty, friendly and polite too!” He smiled at me, the same smile that was always plastered on his face in each video of each exhibition. The same smile that always made me smile too along with all the other smiles of the other members. I felt my heart beat faster at Jungwon’s words. Was that what Sunghoon actually thought of me? 

“Oh, well, tell him he’s really friendly, kind and polite too! And also really good looking” I said the last part a little more shyly, trying my best not to let soft, pink blush flush on my cheeks. 

Jungwon chuckled lightly at my words. I don’t know why but it’s easy to talk to him, I feel like he won’t ever judge me and I can tell him whatever I want. He’s always been one of my comfort places after all, always making a smile appear on my face even during hard times. 

My thinking is quickly interrupted by his soft voice “What are you doing now?” He asked, sounding genuinely curious. I just shrugged before answering.

“I’m just going to look for an empty practice room, I guess” I said, scratching the back of my neck with a shy smile on my face. I still have a lot to practice…

“Oh, we can practice together if you want” He flashed me a bright smile before continuing with his usual, soothing tone of voice “Which song do you need to practice?” He asked, taking his phone out and connecting it to the speakers in the practice room. 

“Oh, I need to practice Alexa’s ‘Back in Vogue’ ” I said, smiling back at him. Yesterday skating practice with Sunghoon and now dance practice with Jungwon? I must be dreaming. Someone wake me up.

“Okay, let’s do this!” He smiled again before starting the song to check if his phone had successfully connected and if the volume was right. He then put his phone down and went to the center of the room, gesturing to me to follow him. We started dancing, his moves were so clean and energetic. I had a lot to learn from him.

We danced for about 2 hours, both of us letting ourselves fall on the floor, tired after our practice. He was the first to stand up, grabbing his water bottle along with mine and bringing it to me. I sat up and thanked him before chugging half of the bottle down. 

“Seems like someone was thirsty, huh?” He teased, wiggling his brows. I barely met him and it already seems like we’ve known each other for half our lives, what the hell? I chuckled at his teasing, standing up as he drank some water from his own bottle too. 

“No but, seriously, Sunghoon was right” He said “You’re really pretty and also really friendly! And you also are really talented” I smiled shyly at his words, looking at my feet and the ground. 

“Thanks” I mumbled, but before I could compliment him too, he spoke again. 

“I would really like to get to know you more, you know? Maybe we could hang out sometime” He said, rushing to get his phone from the right corner of the room’s floor. He came back to me with a cute jog and showed me his number so I could add it into my phone. 

I chuckled as he didn’t even ask if I was okay with all of this, already aware that I was, indeed, more than fine with it. Who would miss the chance to hang out with your idol? I took my phone and added his number in it, saving him as “Wonie :>”

After that we said goodbye to each other and we left the practice room. I went straight to my dorm and in the shower, warm water running down my skin as I rinsed my sweat away, trying to clear my mind from all the things that were happening. All the sensations cursing through my veins overwhelming my senses in the sweetest way possible as all my dreams are finally becoming true. 

As I finally came out of the bathroom I changed into a simple but cute dress that hugged my body perfectly and dried my hair, tying it in a half-ponytail with a bow on it and little braids, tied together at the end, looking like a small crown at the back of my head.

I then proceeded to clean my room nicely so that it was neat and writing a song, then I practiced a bit with the piano and called Mina, telling her about everything that had happened these days: Me meeting Jungwon and Sunghoon, the way I fell, my cut, Sunghoon helping me and also giving me his number just like Jungwon. 

I could feel Mina smiling through the phone and I could tell she was genuinely happy for me and that surely warmed my heart, making me aware that she’ll always be by my side no matter what.

After my almost endless call with Mina I checked my phone to see what time it was, it was 6pm. My eyes darted lower, noticing some notifications from both Jungwon and Sunghoon.

I felt my heart skip a beat as I opened the messages: Sunghoon just sent me a selfie and killed me with it and Jungwon was asking me to hang out with him, Sunghoon and Sunoo? I exhaled a breath I didn’t realize I was holding, my whole body tensing as I realized that I’m about to meet Sunoo, too. 

I felt goosebumps raise all over my body as I realized what time it was: It was already 6.15pm. ‘I’m fucked’ were the only words playing in my head over and over, making me nervous. I ran to the bathroom, spraying some perfume on my neck and wrists, filling the air with my sweet scent, and also put on some makeup, a pretty light one, just some mascara, gloss and blush. Just to accentuate my natural features.

And in no time, it was 7pm. 

I sat on my chair in front of my desk when suddenly someone knocked on my door.

I hesitantly stood up, walking towards the door.

Each step of mine making my heart beat louder, 

So loud that it sounded like a gunshot every time,

So loud that when I opened the door I thought Sunghoon could hear it.

“Hey Y/N” His voice was like a bucket of ice being thrown right at me, bringing me back to reality. I quickly flashed Sunghoon a smile, acting like I wasn’t about to say bye to my sanity just seconds ago. I stepped out of the door, walking alongside him down the hall and towards the elevator. 

“Hello Sunghoon” I say, sounding more tense than I intended to.

“There’s no need to be so tense, Y/N, calm down” He said with a light chuckle. We were trying to become friends after all. I shouldn’t be so tense, he’s right. But how am I supposed to not be tensed up when my idol, and also who I thought was and is the most handsome man in the world, is walking beside me and trying to become friends with me. 

I flash him another warm smile as we reach the elevator, its doors closing behind us. 

“So uhm…” The atmosphere in that small, moving box was thick and suffocating and I felt like I could faint due to the lack of oxygen in a couple minutes. “Was the one in the picture your dog?” 

“Oh, yeah,” Sunghoon started, smiling brightly at me as I mention his dog “Her name is Gaeul”

I nod, happily listening to him and getting more curious by the second. As the elevator came to a stop and we made our way to the small sushi restaurant, and during all of our small trip he couldn’t stop talking about his dog, Gaeul. He told me her breed, the whole story of how he got her, her age and how much she has grown up since he first got her. It was cute, hearing him talking about something he liked made a strange warmth spread through my chest, filling my heart to the brim. 

We slowly made our way through the crowd in the restaurant, coming to a stop as soon as we saw Jungwon waving at us from a table. We sat with them and that’s when I noticed a pretty, blond boy sitting right next to Jungwon,

Sunoo.

Kim Sunoo.

I greeted Jungwon before introducing myself to Sunoo, the usual “I auditioned yesterday to become an idol” leaving my lips right away, all while Sunoo was just flashing him that kind smile of his, the one I adored so much when watching their live performances. 

I sat down between Sunoo and Sunghoon and we started a conversation along with Jungwon about figure skating as soon as they noticed the bandage on my leg from yesterday’s fall while skating with Sunghoon. 

“I really like figure skating, but it’s really not for me” Sunoo said, and Jungwon nodded in agreement “I would fall as soon as I put foot on the ice” He added with the usual sassy laugh, causing a chuckle to escape my lips. 

They were all easy to talk to as we shared anything that came to our mind just as if we’ve known each other for ages. It felt nice to have some new friends around. Some new friends that were also my idols, but still some new friends. My smile never fading as we shared experiences and stories, pouts and laughter, jokes and serious conversations. All of this while munching on some nice sushi, which never tasted this good in my life. Who knows, maybe it’s just the magical atmosphere lingering between us or maybe it’s just their presence to make the moment even more enjoyable. 

Time passed by as fast as the wind between our chatting and the really nice sushi we were having. It all felt amazing, but eventually the evening had to come to an end, and that’s why I’m walking next to Sunoo as he brings me home. 

He offered to accompany me home since we live in the same building. 

Sunghoon had also offered to bring you home, making butterflies dance in my stomach, but Sunoo quickly said he would bring me home and that he didn’t have to worry.

During the trip I kept chatting with Sunoo about everything that crossed my mind, until…

Until we got to Sunghoon.

“He’s nice looking, right?” Sunoo asks, wiggling his brows playfully at me as if I hadn't met him just this night for the first time.

I shyly nodded, thinking about the selfie Sunghoon had sent me earlier with his dog. It was clear that he was laying in bed, his hair messy but soft-looking. He looked cute, yet hot as fuck. When I saw that picture I couldn’t help but let my mind wander a bit, also in places it shouldn’t have gone to. I shook those thoughts away as soon as I noticed how Sunoo was staring at me. 

“I knew it, girl! It’s evident in the way you look at him” Sunoo said, making my cheeks become red. Was it really that evident? I hit Sunoo’s arm playfully as we got into the elevator to reach our floor. He chuckled in response before grabbing his phone and speaking.

“Mind if I get your number? I really loved talking with you tonight, we should meet up more often!” He said with that soft smile of his, making me melt because of his cuteness. I took my phone out too and saved his number in it as soon as we reached my dorm. “Sunoo-ie <3”. That’s how I saved him before waving goodbye. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 3

“About a month had passed since I went to the dinner that brought me to meet the people that became two of my best friends along with Mina: Sunoo and Jungwon. We hung out a lot since then, ending up knowing everything about each other. I also hung out with Sunghoon a lot, but we don’t know each other just as much as I do with Sunoo and Wonie. 

Those two knew everything about me, from my favorite food to my sleeping problems and their solutions, from my most embarrassing moments to the most cheerful ones. They were always supportive to me and helped me whenever I had a problem, giving me advice and hugs to cheer me up whenever my mood was down.

They also knew about a little problem I had with Sunghoon. 

As we hung out during the past weeks I noticed how a warm feeling spreaded all over my body whenever we touched, I felt butterflies in my stomach whenever we talked or even when we were close. The way he laughed or smiled at my silly jokes, the way he hugged me whenever we won a game or simply the way he listened to me when I was frustrated. I started to realize (Also thanks to Sunoo, Mina and Jungwon) that I was falling for him. 

Or I already fell for him. 

I was in love.

I was in love with Park Sunghoon,

And I still am. 

As my mind was filled with thoughts, I didn’t realize I had received a text exactly from Sunghoon, the one permanently clouding my thoughts. I wonder if he’s tired after running in my mind for so long. 

I could swear I felt my heart skip a beat at his messages, first he asks me to go to sleepover at his dorm, and then he tells me “I love when you call me that ;)” after I called him “Hoonie”... This guy is making me go crazy. The butterflies in my stomach weren’t stopping, I wanted to tell Sunoo and Jungwon and Mina about that message too, but I didn’t… I’ll tell them later. The other side of me though, was telling me to stay here, at my own dorm, due to my sleeping problems.

My fucking insomnia.

I couldn’t just take my melatonin right in front of him, or turn on music in my speaker to help get me to relax. It all just sounded so scary… What if Sunghoon found it weird? And what if he just told me to leave after? Oh god… 

I decided to go shower to take all those consuming thoughts out of my mind, Sunoo said it himself “Sunghoon hyung is a really understanding person” when I texted him about the whole situation earlier. 

I just got under the warm stream of water, feeling the pleasurable, burning sensation on my skin as it heated up so nicely… I wish it was Sunghoon keeping me this warm… Fuck Y/N what are you even thinking about? I curse mentally at myself for letting my own thoughts wander this much and I started to wash up quickly, using the sweetest shampoo and bodywash I owned (Under Jungwon’s advice since he told me that Sunghoon likes sweet things) before using a sweet-scented body lotion all over my body. I then changed into some cute clothes and did my hair, by the time it was already 7.30pm…

I looked at myself in the mirror at least 6 times, completely panicked and rethinking my outfit choices, but eventually settled to stay like this. My pink sweater and pink hair clip reminded me of some nice, sweet cotton candy. Sweet, Sunghoon likes sweet things and I do too.

I then sprayed some sweet perfume on my neck and wrists, went over my look one last time and grabbed my things: My skincare products, my pajamas, my toothbrush, my hairbrush, my perfume and clean clothes for tomorrow and, most importantly, my melatonin.

As soon as I took everything and checked the time, I noticed it was already 7.55pm. I rushed out and went all the way to Sunghoon’s dorm. I’ve been there a couple times, but never alone with him: Sunoo, Jungwon or both were always there with us when we hung out at Sunghoon’s dorm. 

I took a really deep breath as soon as I reached his door, I could feel my heart beat faster in my chest, so fast that I thought it was going to stop at any second. I slowly knocked and he opened up almost immediately, as if he was waiting for me right on the other side of the door. 

“Y/N-ieee” He spoke, almost whining and in the cutest way possible. He stepped to the side, letting me into his dorm. It was neat and clean, just as usual. The only difference was that on the bed there were extra pillows and extra blankets, reminding me that I would be staying the night and that I had to tell him about my problem with insomnia somehow tonight. 

“Hey Hoonie” I gave him a bright smile, and I swear I saw a hint of blush on his cheeks. Maybe it was the nickname? Or maybe I’m just daydreaming, fuck my heart and mind. 

“Call me that more, I love it” I swear I felt my heart skip a couple beats at his words, warmth spreading all over my body as I tried my best not to blush. I looked down at the floor, blushing more when I heard him chuckle slightly at me and mumble a small “Cute” to me as he closed the door to his dorm. 

I looked up at him after calming down and he gave me a bright smile. I couldn’t help but notice the pictures hanging on the walls, some with him and the members, some with him and his dog and some pics of him while skating. He looked so effortlessly good in all of them that I wanted to scream. Some pictures were really touching as they showed him along with the rest of the members, one of them holding up an award; others were really funny, like one that showed him and Niki wearing Penguin onesies while forming a heart with their arms. All of those pictures prove the amazing friendship between all of them, the undeniable connection keeping them together growing stronger every time they hung out together. 

I snapped back to reality by something scratching my leg. For a moment I thought it was Sunghoon playing some random joke on me, but when I looked down I noticed a cute, white fluff ball.

His dog.

A gasp escaped my lips at the cuteness as I dropped my bag on the floor and knelt down, caressing the dog’s white fur all over in the gentlest way possible. 

“I see you and Gaeul already love each other, huh?” He teased from behind me, coming back from the small kitchen in his dorm. I didn’t even notice him going there, he probably went there when I was distracted with the pictures on his walls. He knelt down beside me with a bright smile, showing his vampire-like teeth so clearly that I thought I could faint right then and there. 

I chuckled in response to his teasing, still caressing the dog in front of me. I stood up, gesturing to follow him. We sat on his bed after I moved my bag to a corner. The faint smell of his cologne lingering in the air as we sat close to each other on his bed, contemplating on what to do. 

“Maybe we could play some games?” He suggested with a thoughtful expression “Or, if you’re good at baking, you could help me bake some cookies” He said with another smile.

“Why can’t we do both of them?” I asked with a laugh and he laughed along with me, butterflies dancing in my stomach as we shifted to the edge of his bed and he went to turn on his console and TV before handing me a controller. 

We played games for a bit and he won every single game we played.

“Oh come on!” I whined as I lost another game and let myself fall back on his bed with a chuckle. He laughed at me as soon as he won. His laugh felt like therapy, it was contagious. 

“You wanna stop? It’s no fun if I keep winning” He said with a shrug and a smile, letting himself fall on his bed next to me. I simply nodded and we both stood up again, making our way into his small kitchen. 

He took out all the ingredients and then we got to making those cookies. We decided to make some simple chocolate chip cookies. As we cooked I couldn’t help but chuckle at him every time he spilled or dropped something, warmth filling my heart at all his small actions. 

As we put the cookies in the oven he commented “Is that you smelling like cotton candy or what is it?” He asked, getting closer to me and leaning in. I could feel his hot breath on my neck as he smelled my perfume, letting it flood his lungs. 

“It’s probably my perfume” I mumbled, my voice sounding shakier than intended. He slowly pulled back mumbling a small “So good” and looked directly into my eyes, making a shiver run down my spine. I shifted my gaze towards the floor to hide my blushing face.

“It is your perfume, yeah” He said with a smile. “It smells really good” He said with a warm smile, and time I’m sure he was blushing a bit too. 

I jumped a bit when he gasped dramatically after looking at the time: It was already 9pm. I chuckled at his dramatic behavior as we decided to change into our pajamas and just get ready to sleep so we could play some board games and watch a movie without worrying about falling asleep by accident without getting ready first.

He went to the bathroom and changed first, coming back with a simple white t-shirt that was a bit too big for him and sweatpants. Then it was my turn. I made my way in the small bathroom and closed the door, noticing his toothbrush in a glass by the sink and his cologne right there on a small shelf along with all his skincare products. I changed into my pajamas, a simple set of matching pants and shirt with little bears on them, and let my hair down, passing a hand through it. 

I then came out of the bathroom and Sunghoon clapped cutely at me “So cute!” He spoke, a soft smile playing on his flawless face and a glint of blush never leaving his cheeks. “Shall we brush our teeth and do our skincare? Maybe a face mask too?” He suggested with a smile, already walking back into the bathroom without even giving me time to answer. I quickly followed behind him getting back into the bathroom, this time with my bag in hand. 

I took out my skincare products, placing them near the sink, while he looked for some masks to do. I took out my cleanser, my hydrating cream, my toner and my sunscreen. Just as I took everything out he turned to me with 2 face masks in his hands. He smirked at me and wiggled his brows playfully just as he showed them to me and we both burst out laughing. It was easy to talk to him, but will it be just as easy to tell him about my insomnia? 

We did our skincare and brushed our teeth, his minty breath hitting my face every now and then as he helped me put the face mask on and I did the same, feeling my heart beat so fast and loud in my chest that I thought it was gonna explode as soon as my fingertips touched his silky, warm skin.

After that, we got back to his room and sat on the bed simply chatting a bit about random topics, just waiting for the moisture in the masks to be absorbed by our skin. We then took each other’s masks off, again feeling his minty breath and the urge to kiss him, before laying comfortably in his bed, our heads resting against the headboard and the too-many pillows he brought.

And then it comes, the moment I feared the most.

I had to take my melatonin and tell him about my sleeping problems,

About my insomnia.

I reached for my bag on the floor and took out my melatonin pills before speaking.

“Sunghoon, can I please get a glass of water..?” I ask, pointing to the small pill I had in my hand and signaling that I needed the water to take it.

He just looked at me with a confused expression and nodded before standing up and walking to the kitchen, coming back with a glass of water and handing it to me before asking me the question I was so scared of “What are those pills?” He spoke, his voice barely above a whisper and clearly filled with concern.

“They’re melatonin pills,” I said, looking down. “I suffer of Insomnia” I added with a sigh and a sad expression, already knowing this will be one of those sleepless nights due to the unfamiliar surroundings. 

“Oh” He said, his pretty eyes filled with worry, making my heart shatter into a million pieces “Is there any way I could help you sleep?” He asked, making my heart beat faster. Sunoo was right, he was definitely an understanding person, and that fueled my feelings for him even more.

“I usually turn on some soothing music to help me fall asleep, but that might bother you” I answered, my eyes never leaving the blankets on top of my legs “Or I hug a pillow, that would be a nice option if you have an extra one” I added, now looking up at him with shy, hesitant eyes. 

“I do have an extra pillow, but I don’t think it’ll fit between us” He said, pointing to the small space between our bodies, the closeness between us making me shiver “You can hug me, though” He added, and that’s when I swear I felt my soul leave my body, drifting off into the sky and never coming back. Or maybe it was his soul drifting right into my heart so I’ll never be able to stop loving him, who knows.

“Are you sure that’s okay with you?” I asked, surprisingly sounding steady enough. His words “You can hug me, though” playing in my head over and over again.

“Yeah, I’m more than okay with it” He said with a shrug before turning his TV on and looking for a movie on Netflix. Soft blush creeped on my cheeks but I was good enough to look away for a moment and hide it. 

He suddenly turned to me and asked “Is this movie okay?” He pointed to the TV on the other side of the room, a romantic movie on it. I thought of suggesting a horror one so that whenever a jumpscare comes I could cling to him, but since we both hate them I changed my mind and just accepted. If he did like horror movies I would’ve asked for one even if I hate them.

As the movie played, kissing scenes kept showing every now and then, making us both giggle like some stupid children, but even between our playful banter, I swear I noticed him shifting closer to me every time I was distracted. 

The movie seemed to end really fast, as if it was only 10 minutes long. I guess it’s because time seems to pass by faster when I’m having fun.

After he turned the TV off, he turned to me and asked softly in a tired, yet really fucking hot voice “Do you wanna sleep?” 

I just nodded in response, sliding down until my head was resting on the pillow instead of the headboard, and looked at him, hesitance clear in my eyes as I spoke “Are you sure I can hug you?” My voice barely above a whisper as I spoke shyly.

“Of course” He gave me a soft smile, the softest smile I’ve ever seen and that made me want to pinch his cheeks and kiss him like there was no tomorrow “And wake me up if you can’t sleep, you’re not alone in this” 

His words made me melt, literally, I was sweating. He was so sweet that I swear I smelled a scent so close to cotton candy that it made my mouth water.

I slowly shifted closer to him, my head resting on his chest and my arm over his stomach. 

He was warm, really warm.

And his heartbeat made me relax, I felt sleepy already.

But just as my own heartbeat started to slow down, relaxing, he wrapped his arm around my waist, making it beat faster once again. Even faster than before.

I felt safe, secure. I relaxed again as soon as he turned the lights off and whispered a soft “Good night, Y/N”.

His strong arms fit perfectly on my waist, making me feel safer than usual. I closed my eyes after whispering a small “Good night” back to him. My breathing slowing down and matching his,

I start to feel sleepy,

Sleepier and sleepier,

Until I finally left the hearth and traveled to dream land, Sunghoon never leaving my side, 

Keeping me close,

Keeping me warm,

Keeping me safe.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 4

“  I woke up feeling a pair of strong arms wrapped around me, my head resting on a warm surface that made a heart beating noise. I slowly opened my eyes just to see that…

Park Sunghoon was the one hugging me.

My head was laying on his chest.

His heart was the one I was hearing.

His breathing was the one matching mine.

He was the one keeping me warm all night long.

He was the one that gave me the best sleep of my life. 

I felt my heart beating faster at the sight of his sleepy face as I stared at him, all while enjoying the warm and safe feeling his embrace gave me. 

I got startled when I felt him shifting underneath me, his eyes slowly opening as I lifted my head from his chest to look at him, his sleepy face being the cutest thing I’ve seen so far. 

“Good morning” He spoke, his voice low and deep, groggy from sleep. I shivered as he moved his arm lower, from my waist to my hips, holding me close as we laid together in the warm embrace of the blankets.

“Good morning…” I replied shyly, looking away as I felt my face heat up, sure that I looked like a tomato ready to be eaten.

“Lay with me some more, please” He whispered, pulling me even closer to him and making me shiver under his touch. I rested my head on his chest again, enjoying the closeness between our bodies. His slow breathing made me relax and cream against him.

“How did you sleep?” He asked, now sounding a bit concerned as he knows about my problems with sleep. 

“I slept really well, this was probably one of my best nights so far” I gave him a smile as I spoke, a wide one, a genuine one as I was truly happy that I was finally able to sleep all night long without waking up in the middle of sleep. And also truly happy that I slept cuddled up against my Idol and crush’s side, in his embrace. 

He smiled back at me, making me wish to kiss that smile until my lips bleed. 

He jumped up when his phone started ringing, it was “Jaikeu :]” . The cute name made me giggle. He sat up a bit, not letting me go as he answered the call.

“Hey Jake” He spoke, a wide smile painted on his oh-so-kissable lips. 

“Hi” I heard from the other side of the phone. I could only imagine it was Jake, or the one and only Shim Jaehyun. “I know you’re busy with your ‘Girlfriend’- Sorry, with Y/N, but our Kid Nishimura Riki wants you to be here too” Jake spoke through the phone and I choked when he called me Sunghoon’s girlfriend. He then spoke in a cute voice “Do you wanna hang out with us today? We could play games at my place” Jake spoke, clearly pouting from the other side of the phone.

Sunghoon looked at me and probably understood that I heard the whole conversation they just had. He silently mouthed to me the words “Do you wanna come too?” and I just nodded with a shrug. I would meet 2 more of my idols after all, so why not?

“Okay, sure” He paused for a moment at the phone before continuing “Can Y/N come too?” I heard Jake answer with a quick “Yes” from the other side before they agreed on the time in which we had to meet and hung up with a bright smile.

“Today, 3pm, Jake’s dorm” He said, rubbing my back gently. I smiled back, feeling truly happy for once in my life. I nodded and sat up along with him.

“I’ll go get dressed, okay?” I asked, slowly getting out of bed before whispering. “Sunghoon,” He nodded and turned to me as soon as I whispered his name, looking at me deep in the eyes with his expressive ones “Thank you” He just smiled at me, in his eyes a silent ‘You can always vent to me’.

I headed towards the bathroom, closing the door behind me and wearing the spare clothes I brought with me before doing my skincare and hair.

I then sprayed some perfume I brought with me (The sweet one, the one Sunghoon likes) and headed out. He stared at me, his mouth hanging slightly open.

“So pretty” He said, giving me a warm smile and standing up, heading to the bathroom himself. “And you smell good too, as always”. I blush softly at his compliments, a small chuckle going past my lips.

I watch him as he disappears into the bathroom before coming back after a while, all fresh and dressed up with a light blue shirt and some simple, black jeans. He looked so elegant and expensive even if he was dressed up in a casual way.

I grabbed my bag and gathered my things. I can’t wait to tell Sunoo and Jungwon about all of this, but all this tea is too important to be spilled over a chat, I’ll tell them when I see them.

I checked my phone and, just as I was thinking of him, Sunoo texted me a quick “How did it go” and a “How did you sleep?” I replied with a quick “It went well, I’ll tell you more when I see you <3” and locked my phone.

During all of this, Sunghoon was desperately looking for his phone. He used it earlier when Jake called but now he couldn’t find it.

“Sunghoo-” My words were cut off by him speaking.

“Shit, I can’t find it!” It was clear, he was getting frustrated.

“Sungho-”

“WHY?!” He whined, interrupting me once more.

“PARK SUNGHOON” He finally looked at me as I spoke in the calmest tone ever “Look what’s in your hand” I pointed at his left hand.

He was holding his phone during all of this, this silly, yet charming and sweet, boy. He looked down at the phone in his hand, then at me, then back at the phone and then back at me, this time with a laugh that made my heart swell with affection. 

He finished gathering his things before we headed out for lunch, going to the same small place where I met my best friend: Sunoo. We sat down and ate normally, talking about any sort of thing that went through our mind: My insomnia, his dog, dogs and animals in general, dance practices, auditions, Jay’s cooking and food. 

As we finished, I offered to pay but he stopped me, handing his card to the waiter before I had time to say anything. When I scolded him as we were getting out of the restaurant, he used the excuse of “I’m an Idol, I have way more money than you”. How silly. 

As we made our way to Jake’s dorm, we passed in front of the posters with the people auditioning and… The results. Finally. I stopped in my tracks, running towards the posters right away, and started looking for my name between a lot of others. 

Until I found it.

Y/N.

Next to it, the result was written.

‘Audition passed’.

I felt my heart beat faster in joy, I was so happy that I didn’t notice Sunghoon running behind me and stopping to stand beside me, watching me as I jumped like a kid on their birthday. He hugged me as soon as he saw my result, jumping with me. 

“I’m so proud of you, Y/N-ah!” He said as he hugged me tighter, reminding me of the previous night, when we slept in each other’s arms and I actually did sleep. 

A small tear of joy ran down my face as we hugged, a big smile plastered on both our faces. “Thank you, Sunghoon-ah!” I answered, looking at him deep in the eyes before hugging him tight again. My face buried in his neck, his intoxicating scent filling my lungs. 

After a bit of jumping around, we started walking again, making our way to Jake's place. If I thought I’d feel anxious to meet him and Niki, I was actually pretty relaxed. Maybe it was because I was with Sunghoon? Or maybe because I knew I passed my audition? I don’t know, but it doesn’t matter right now as we finally reached Jake’s dorm. 

Sunghoon knocked on the door. After not even 2 seconds a screaming Niki opened it. I jumped a bit when Niki jumped in Sunghoon’s arms screaming “JAKE HYUNG WANTS TO TICKLE ME TO DEATH”. Both me and Sunghoon burst out laughing as soon as we saw Jake leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest as he looked at Niki with a playful smirk on his face,

When Niki turned around and looked at Jake he screamed again, but when he noticed me he stopped clinging to Sunghoon and just normally introduced himself, as if he didn’t just scream his lungs out because Jake was trying to tickle him. “Hey, I’m Niki, you must be Y/N, nice to meet you” He said, offering me his hand for a handshake.

I then looked at Jake and he introduced himself too “And I’m Jake” He gave me his usual, contagious smile, the one I used to go crazy for in their videos. 

I also introduced myself, but this time as a trainee, mentioning that I passed my audition. 

We made our way into Jake’s dorm, it was way messier than Sunghoon’s, but still not too dirty or messy. I was honestly a little surprised: I thought his dorm was going to be a mess after seeing Niki scream and run like that. 

We all sat on Jake’s bed, playing some video games at first but getting bored after a couple matches. That’s when we decided to play truth or dare all together. 

“Niki, truth or dare?” Sunghoon asked Niki, and he thought for a moment before answering with a confident “Dare”. 

“I dare you to tickle Jake for 30 seconds to get your revenge” Sunghoon spoke with a chuckle, making butterflies dance in my stomach more and more. I laughed when I saw the expression on Jake’s face. He side eyed Sunghoon so bad I thought his eyes were going to turn around completely. Not even Sunoo ever side eyed anyone like that. Niki, on the other hand, was smiling a lot and giggling like a 3-year-old. 

Niki counted to 3 and jumped on Jake, tickling him all over and almost making them both fall off the bed. Jake was a screaming mess too now, repeating ‘Sorry’ over and over again while laughing his soul out. Me and Sunghoon counted the 30 seconds while laughing, making me feel warm, but definitely happy, all over.

As the 30 seconds were up, Niki asked “Jake, truth or dare?”

Jake answered right away with a convincing “TRUTH”. He knew that, if he chose dare, Niki would dare him to do the most embarrassing thing ever (These dumb children). 

Niki whined but still asked Jake a dare “Do you think Y/N is pretty?”

I felt my cheeks heat up a little bit at Niki’s question, but I became a literal tomato when Jake nodded. I looked at Sunghoon and I’m sure that what I saw in his eyes was jealousy, somehow. He was piercing holes in Jake’s skin with how intensely he was staring at him. 

Jake just glanced at Sunghoon and then looked down, as if he was saying sorry. After that, he spoke, “Sunghoon, truth or dare?”

Sunghoon thought about his answer for a moment before speaking, “Dare”. He didn’t look too confident about his choice, but he also didn’t look too hesitant.

“I dare you to whisper something in Y/N’s ear”, Jake said. And in that moment I swear this time Sunghoon’s ears and cheeks turned red, as if he just ate something really spicy. Jake giggled a bit at his friend’s reaction and wiggled his eyebrows teasingly. What did he know that I wasn’t aware of?

My thoughts came to a stop when Sunghoon shifted closer to me and leaned in, his hot breath on my neck and right ear. “I ate Sunoo’s cookies yesterday, but don’t tell him, please” He whispered. His whisper was hot as fuck, his breath hitting my neck and I could smell his strong scent, my vision going fuzzy for a moment. Even if the words he said were stupid as heck, he still sounded really hot. Goosebumps raised all over my skin, I stopped breathing for a moment and butterflies danced in my stomach with all their strength. My chest felt warm, just like my stomach did. I felt warm all over, my mouth going dry. 

“Someone looks flustered” Niki teased, referring to me. I glanced at me, with the amazing side eye Sunoo taught me how to do, and whispered under my breath “Shut up you kiddo”.

Sunghoon and Jake both burst out laughing, Niki started laughing because the other two were laughing and I started laughing because they all were laughing. What a chain reaction.

The rest of the day passed by rather fast between silly jokes and games, laughter and whines (Especially by Niki, that hyperactive child). 

Sunghoon brought me back to my dorm at about 6pm, my heart dropping into my stomach as I had to say goodbye to him, closing the door behind me as I passed past my door. I swear I saw a glint of sadness in his eyes too as I closed the door, making me even sadder.

I quickly texted Sunoo to come over, I had to tell him EVERYTHING that had happened. From the sleepover to the cuddles, from Jake’s call to his dare for Sunghoon. Everything. Every single detail. 

Sunoo didn’t even answer and directly knocked on my door. I opened it and we greeted each other with our usual hug and sat on my bed.

“Spill the tea girl” He said, leaning in closer and raising an eyebrow at me with a smirk.

I just told him everything, Sunghoon’s reaction to my insomnia, what we did, that we slept hugging each other, Jake calling me Sunghoon’s girlfriend while on a call with Sunghoon, Niki’s screams and whined, how I met them and all the game of truth or dare, everything in the most detailed way possible. I also told him that I passed my audition and a big, warm smile formed on his lips. I didn’t tell him about Sunghoon and the cookies, though. 

It was now 8pm. Did it really take me this long to tell him everything? Damn. We hugged one last time before he spoke softly “You’re really whipped for him, aren’t you?” He asked with a soft chuckle.

“I swear when he smiles I forget how to breathe” I answer and we say bye to each other. 

After Sunoo left, I washed up and ate some quick noodles before going straight to bed, tired from the long day that I just lived. 

I slept well that night, Sunghoon never leaving my mind as I fell asleep hugging my usual pillow, this time thinking it was him. 

For the next four months we just kept hanging out all together and I noticed Sunghoon sticking to me a bit more than usual, but I didn’t really pay attention  to that. 

It was now December, and I had already prepared Sunghoon’s birthday gift. 2 tickets to go see fireworks on the 10th December. One for him and the other for whoever he wanted to go with. I also had already fantasized about that extra ticket to be given to me, but I knew it would never happen, sadly. 

I sat on the bed after practice and checked my phone, my heart beating faster and my breathing coming to a stop at the messages I saw.

CHAPTER 5

The so-long-awaited day arrived, Sunghoon’s birthday party was going to be today at 6pm. A shiver ran down my spine at the thought of meeting Heeseung and Jay too as Jungwon had told me they would come. I sat on my bed, thinking about what to wear. My mind soon drifted to something, or more like someone, else.

Sunghoon.

So many questions ran through my mind whenever I heard his name. Should I confess my feelings? Should I not say anything? Should I flirt and try to get him to love me back? Does he love me back just like Sunoo said? 

Yes, Sunoo said that Sunghoon probably loves me back. Sunoo said Sunghoon never stops talking about me and that his eyes light up every time he hears my name. Sunoo said that Sunghoon always wants to hang out with me but doesn’t ask that much because of his busy schedule and because he doesn’t want to be a bother for me either. 

Sunoo told me so many things about Sunghoon that I started to love him even more.

I shook my head, coming back to my senses. It was already 4pm. Shit.

I ran to the bathroom and took a shower (ofc using the sweetest-smelling soaps I owned) and used my usual, sweet lotion all over my body. I then started looking for the right clothes. I needed something comfortable since I knew Niki was going to drag me all around the house and Jungwon was gonna chase me to tickle me. 

I wore some simple, golden jewelry and sprayed some sweet perfume all over, making sure to smell good all night.

I then wore some simple, white sneakers and headed out, making my way to Sunghoon’s dorm. 

As I got there, I could hear talking and laughing from inside. I knocked on the door, and as it opened, an elegantly-dressed Sunghoon was staring directly down at me with a small smile.

“Hey Y/Nnnie!” He said, pulling me in a friendly hug. I swear I felt him take a deep breath directly against my neck before whispering a soft “You smell so good, so sweet…” 

I shivered at his muttered words before answering his greeting “Hi Hoonie” I said with a small chuckle. As he let me go from the hug, he dragged me all the way to the main area where the party was, in his small living room. As I arrived there, I saw some drinks on the table along with some snacks and plates already placed carefully in front of 8 chairs. I look around until I feel two arms wrapping around me and…

“Y/N JAKE-HYUNG WANTS TO TICKLE ME HELP” Niki screamed in my ear as Jake rushed to us, tickling Niki and making him pull away from me, running towards the bathroom.

I looked around, the walls neatly decorated with some penguin drawings and more pictures, on Sunghoon’s bedside table was resting a beautiful bouquet of flowers. Wait, flowers? Who were they for? I shook those thoughts out of my mind, looking towards the small couch where…

Where Heeseung was chatting with Sunoo. The Lee Heeseung.

“Y/N!!” Sunoo exclaimed and jumped up, rushing towards me and pulling me into a hug. I looked behind him, Heeseung had stood up, walking towards us with his usual flirty-like demeanor. 

“Hi Sunnie” I say, reciprocating Sunoo’s hug. I smile as he lets me go, looking back at Heeseung who was now extending his hand towards me.

“Hi, I’m Heeseung” He said, and I gladly took his hand in a polite handshake.

“I’m Y/N” I answer with a smile. I look back as I feel a hand on my shoulder, to be more precise, Sunghoon’s hand. 

“Guys, food is ready” He said with a warm smile. It was so warm that it went in contrast with his cold-like features, but they surely created a perfect match.

We all follow him to the table and sit down. I took my place between Sunoo and Jungwon, Sunghoon sitting in front of me. I look towards the kitchen just to see Jay coming with some plates, a wide smile on his face as he hummed to an unknown lullaby stuck in his head.

He immediately put a plate in front of me, I was the first one being served, apparently.

“Ladies first” He said with a wink before speaking again “I’m Jay, but I bet you already know” He said with a smile.

“I’m Y/N and-” My words are cut off by two long whines, one from Sunghoon and the other from Niki. 

“The birthday boy should go first!” Sunghoon protested with a cute pout.

“No, the youngest should!” Niki answered with another whine.

Me and Jay looked at each other before laughing. As we calmed down, Jay spoke again. “No, ladies first” He said, winking at me once again.

“Yah Jay stop flirting”  Heeseung said from the other side of the table.

Jay side eyed him and walked back to the kitchen, grabbing more food until everyone was served.

And until Niki finally stopped whining. 

“This is really good” I say, looking towards Jay and pointing to the stir-fried rice in front of me. “Did you cook it?” I ask, still looking towards Jay. He smiled at me, a satisfied expression on his face as he nodded, silently answering my question.

I noticed Sunghoon staring at him in a stern way, as if he was going to kill him at any moment. I took another bite of my rice and chewed on it happily while Niki kept annoying Heeseung by stealing his rice from his plate. 

Dinner time went by rather fast, all between chuckles, Jay’s homemade food and Niki’s whines and jokes.

It was now 9pm and we were all talking and chatting with each other, Niki dragging me all around Sunghoon’s dorm and explaining the backstory of each one of the pictures hanging on his walls. 

Sunghoon came to me every once in a while, trying to talk to me, but whenever he said “Y/N, can I talk to you for a second?” Niki dragged me somewhere else. I also noticed Sunoo and Jungwon cheering Sunghoon up and pointing to me while talking with him, but I didn’t really pay attention to that. 

When the time to open the presents arrived, Sunghoon sat happily on the center of the small couch while the rest of us sat on the floor or next to him. 

The first present was Jake’s, which had gifted Sunghoon a shirt with ‘ice prince’ written on it, then Jay’s, who had gifted him a simple necklace, then Heeseung’s, which was a prada bag, then Niki’s, that was a new game for his nintendo switch (And that kid wrote his name in the wrong way on the card: Kimura Nirisi. It was Heeseung that had to correct him right then and there reminding him that his name was actually Nishimura Riki), then Sunoo’s and Jungwon’s, who both gifted him shirts with two of their pictures on them, and then mine.

I gave him two tickets to go see fireworks. One for himself and one to give to whoever he wanted to go with him.

“Thank you everyone!” He said with a bright smile, adjusting his pointy, birthday hat on his head. We all pulled each other in a group hug, Niki whining that he ‘couldn’t breathe due to Jay’s armpits smelling bad’.

We just chatted for the rest of the evening. Sunghoon tried dragging me to the side a couple times to tell me something, but everytime one of the other members pulled me away from him. 

As we were all saying bye to each other, I was the last one to exit. Sunghoon stopped me by the door, holding my wrist in a gentle, yet firm, way.

“I want you to have this,” He said, handing me the extra ticket for the fireworks. “I want to go with you” He added, a soft smile on his face even if I could see a hint of nervousness in his eyes. I took the ticket, putting it into my small bag, nodding softly.

“I’ll be there” I reassure him, flashing him a smile. As I got home, I did my usual night routine, brushing my teeth and doing my skincare before changing into my Pj's and heading to bed.

That night nothing seemed to help me sleep, my melatonin seemed to not even have an effect on me, soft background music didn’t help and not even hugging my pillow helped. I jumped up, fully awake once again, as soon as I heard my phone buzzing repeatedly.

I look over at it, an incoming call from “Sunghoonie ;)”. Sunghoon calling me? Maybe I forgot something there?

I answer, a sleepy “Hi” coming from my lips. 

“Hi” He said, he sounded nervous yet sleepy, and god if his voice was hot like that. “I can’t sleep and you came to my mind… Did I wake you up?” He asked, probably knowing that I wouldn’t be able to sleep after talking with so many people not even an hour ago, kept up by the adrenaline coursing through my veins.

“No, no, I can’t sleep either, you didn’t wake me up” I answer, laying back down, putting my phone on speaker and setting it down next to me as I snuggle in the soft, fluffy and warm sheets of my bed. “Why can’t you sleep?” 

“Sleeping is hard when you have so much on your mind” He answered, I could hear the shuffling of his sheets from the other side, probably placing his phone next to himself on speaker like me.The image of him, laying in bed, all snuggly and cute while talking to me on the phone causing goosebumps to raise all over my skin, butterflies dancing elegantly in my stomach.

“Why? What’s on your mind?” I ask, my voice soft and understanding as I hope he won’t notice that part filled with pure, unfiltered love.

“You” He simply said, I felt a sudden rush of warmth run up my neck and my face. I probably looked like a tomato. My heart was beating louder and faster, I felt like I could die right then and there as I held my breath without even noticing, millions of thoughts running through my mind at an inhuman speed.

Probably due to my lack of response, he spoke again “Can we stay on a call while we sleep? Your breathing is relaxing…” He said, I could sense the sleepiness in his words, he was probably falling asleep already, while my heart was beating fast as fuck, my breathing was heavy and his words made me shiver and blush like an idiot. 

“Of course” I said, trying to sound stable, as if I wasn’t just kicking my feet on my bed while hiding my face in my hands. 

After a couple minutes, I couldn’t hear anything anymore, the only sounds coming from his side were the soft shuffling of the sheets and his soft breathing. The image of him sleeping softly formed in my mind, making my heart swell with love and affection as I laid my head back against the pillow, while having another one there to hug. I wonder what he’s dreaming about, I bet he looks so peaceful in his sleep.

I wrapped my arms around my pillow, of course imagining it being him, all cuddly and warm, and, soothed by his soft breathing which was more like a lullaby to me, while thinking about when we’ll go see the fireworks together, slowly fell asleep with him clouding my mind in the best and sweetest way possible. My own side of the phone call became silent too, the only sounds being my heart beating loudly for him and my soft breathing, along with some casual rustling of my own warm, comforting sheets.

CHAPTER 6

“   After 2 long, tiring, intense and full days passed by, it was finally the so-awaited day of the fireworks. Me and Sunghoon agreed that he would pick me up and we would go there together at 9pm, the show would start at 10. During the day I met up with Sunoo and Jungwon, of course gossipping and talking about how this evening could possibly go. We were sitting in a cute cafe, just talking.

“You know, I saw a bouquet of flowers on Sunghoon’s bedside table” Sunoo started with a small smirk “I think he’s gonna give it to you”

I quickly shook my head, chuckling a little at how stupid his words are. Why would Sunghoon give those flowers to me? I love him, yeah, but he doesn’t feel the same, and I’m sure about that. I quickly denied, shaking my head, a well hidden hint of sadness in my voice, “Nah, I don’t think so”.

“Oh, come on, Y/N!”  Jungwon joined in, nudging my shoulder in a comforting manner, as if he was able to sense my sadness, as if he was able to sense how broken and hurt my heart was. “Stop speaking so lowly of yourself! I’m sure Sunghoon might actually like you back!” 

“Jungwon, I don’t like him, I fucking love him” I say, turning to him in a dramatic way, trying to lighten the mood up a little. The other two just giggled a bit, and then we changed topic, just simply talking about random shit: From their upcoming comeback to my training and possible debut next year. 

When I got home, I felt goosebumps raise all over my skin as I saw the time. 7pm. I rushed to shower, applying that sweet lotion that had become a must, and then changing. I decided to dress up casual yet elegant, adding a cute, silky, black bow to my hair.

I sprayed my now usual sweet perfume before gathering my things, my ticket, my phone, my wallet and some makeup products in case I needed any touch ups. I sat on my couch and waited for Sunghoon to arrive patiently, my heart racing in my chest, goosebumps rising on my skin and a cocktail of emotions cursing through my veins: Anxiety, excitement, happiness and pure, unfiltered love, adoration and affection.

I got snapped back to reality when I heard a knocking sound coming from my front door. I stood up, my knees weak, my hands shaky as they clung to my bag’s handle. I opened the door and there, right behind it, stood a tall, nice yet nervous looking Sunghoon.

Why was he nervous, though? 

“Hi” He said, his greeting was shakier and more spent than usual. I couldn’t help but notice how he avoided eye contact, how his free hand clung to the hem of his jacket…

Wait,

Free hand?

Where’s the other one?

It was straight in front of me, holding that same bouquet I saw at his birthday, the same bouquet Sunoo and Jungwon told me about.

So it was actually for me…

He was also holding a letter…

“I’ve never been good at telling people how I feel,” He started, a hint of vulnerability in his voice as he handed me the letter and the flowers with a shaky hand. “But you make me want to try”

I flashed him a small, shy smile and he responded with one too, but quickly stopped me when I tried opening the letter. “Wait! I’ll tell you when to open it” 

I shrugged lightly and put the letter in my bag and then went out, locking my door. I followed him outside the building and the car, where one of his staff members was. Sunghoon had told me over text that one of the staff members would drive for us.

As we arrived at our destination, the ‘driver’ dropped us down and told us to call him whenever we wanted to go home and also that we deserve to have some fun too. 

I walked beside Sunghoon and couldn’t help but notice how his hand twitched whenever I walked too close to him, as if he wanted to touch or grab something. He was probably too shy, though, so I decided to take the lead in this.

“Wanna hold hands?” I asked, offering him my hand with a warm smile, “If it’s not too cheesy, of course” I added with a laugh, and I swear I went straight to heaven when he took my hand with a bright smile and the most beautiful laugh ever.

When we arrived near the lake where the firework show will be at, the security stopped us and asked for our tickets. We both took them out and showed them to the security before making our way past the fences. 

We sat down on a bench pretty close to the lake, flowers surrounding us, the stars and moon already shining in the sky, casting a soft glow over his skin, making him look ethereal.

“You know,” He spoke, his voice soft and I could feel the small glint of vulnerability in it despite him seeming more confident now. “You’re like the stars, beautiful to look at, but impossible to catch”

A hurricane of feelings and sensations cursed through my veins at those words: Shivers running down my spine from the cold, my cheeks heating up a bit, the wind through my hair, my heart beating faster, his eyes on me, the nature around us, the soft trickling sound of water coming from the lake, soothing me deeper into this intense feeling of pure, raw, unfiltered love. 

“Are you cold?” He asked again, now his cheeks are of a soft shade of pink too. He didn’t give me time to answer and just took his jacket off, draping it over my shoulders, drowning me in his scent and warmth. 

“Thank you…” I mumbled in response, too shy to say anything else, overwhelmed by his strong scent filling my lungs, coming from both him and his jacket. 

We both look up at the sky when we hear a loud ‘pop’ sound.

The fireworks.

So pretty.

They’re like my love for him, burning and exploding in uncountable little lights of adoration, affection and care.

As they explode, I turn to look at him,

His eyes already piercing holes through my skin,

They meet, our eyes,

We get closer,

And closer,

Impossibly closer,

His breath fanning over my lips, hot and minty, addicting,

His hand caressing my jawline

As our lips meet.

I could taste his cherry chapstick on his lips, the faint mint of his toothpaste, and his unique, intoxicating taste.

He was everywhere, in my mind and heart, tattooed in my soul.

His tongue danced with mine with passion,

Pure,

Raw,

Unfiltered,

LOVE.

His scent was everywhere, filling my lungs and nostrils, his touch causing goosebumps to raise all over my skin.

It all felt so good, 

So fucking good,

Intoxicating,

Addicting,

Until…

Until it stopped.

Until we broke the kiss, panting for air.

But the only thing I could breathe was his scent, the only things I could feel were his lips on mine and his touch.

We stared at each other until he broke the eye contact, pointing towards my bag, 

“Open the letter” He said, his voice breathless, shaky, I could sense how overwhelmed he was by all these feelings, too.

I took the letter and opened it, my hands shaking, my heart beating loud and fast against my chest, my breath hitching.

“I fell in love with the million things you didn’t know you were doing, your flaws, your imperfections, your mistakes, all of you. Suddenly, all the love songs were about you, and you became the ‘nothing’ I say when people ask me what I’m thinking about. I swear when you smile I forget how to breathe. I have so, so, so much love for you in my heart that it doesn’t fit.

-Sunghoon”

Those were the words written in his letter,

So simple, yet so meaningful.

I looked up at him,

Tears in his eyes, overwhelmed by all those sensations,

Tears in my own,

My hands moving to cup his cheeks, wiping his tears with my thumbs,

“I love you”, I said.

And that’s all he needed to hear,

All he needed to hear to press his lips against mine again,

The fireworks and the rest of the world fading away, us and our newfound love being the only things left in that unforgettable moment.

His tongue exploring my mouth,

His hands on my waist, his thumbs drawing small circles on my sides,

“Fuck, I’m so weak when it comes to you”, He whispered against my mouth.

Butterflies dancing in my stomach, my vision going fuzzy, my heart beating like crazy, our lips dancing together.

He broke the kiss after about a minute and pulled his phone out with shaky hands, calling the staff member that brought us here, telling him to come pick us up.

He then hung up, concentrating on me again, as if I was the only thing that mattered in that moment. 

He stood up and grabbed my hand, dragging me back near the street.

“Sorry, but I really wanna spend more time with you” He said, getting close to me again, his arms wrapping around me again, pulling me flush against him, holding me close, the warmth radiating off him seeping into my skin.

As soon as the (poor) staff member arrived, we hurried in his car. The rest of the car drive was silent except for when our ‘driver’ asked us how it all went, and Sunghoon answered with a confident, steady voice. As if his hand wasn’t caressing my thigh all the time. As if he wasn’t turning to leave a kiss on my neck every couple minutes, as if he wasn’t making me crazy.

As soon as the staff dropped us in front of our building, we rushed inside, running up the stairs and into my dorm. 

I had just enough time to lock the door behind us that he was already pinning me to the wall, his lips on mine again, my hands on his chest, feeling his heartbeat.

Feeling the heart that wasn’t beating just for him anymore, but for me too.

Our lips danced together, his hands traveled from my hips to my waist and back, going upwards ‘till my neck and cheeks. 

His lips trailed down my jawline and neck, leaving a trail of goosebumps and passion behind them.

His hands moved back to my waist as he broke the kiss to look deep into my eyes.

“I love you, Y/N, so much” He whispered, burying his face in the crook of my neck.

“All of you, your eyes, your nose, your lips, your cheeks, your jawline, your neck, your collarbones, your shoulders, your arms, your hands, your chest, your tummy, your hips, your waist, even your fucking legs and thighs, your hair, your scent, your voice, the way you look at me, how much effort and care you put into everything you do, the way you always care about everyone and everything, the way you make sure that everyone feels loved and cherished, the way your eyes crinkle at the corners when you smile, the way your cheeks flush whenever you’re shy, the way you always listen to everyone’s problems and give them advice, the way you jump happily whenever someone brings you sweets or just any type of food. And the list goes on, I could go on for seconds, minutes, hours, days, months, years even. But the things I love most about you? Your heart and soul. Those are irreplaceable. They’re yours, and I love you.”

I felt tears roll down my cheeks at his words, and he kissed them away with so much care, love and adoration.

That night, 

That night he proved me just how much he loved me,

Our bodies became one,

He was gentle, soft,

He made sure I felt good, he made sure I felt loved and cherished, he made sure that I felt adored.

He shared his heart and soul with me, we poured our hearts out to the other,

We let out all those unspoken feeling that were destroying us from the inside,

All those feelings that were sharp and hurtful when they were inside us, but turned out to be as beautiful as those fireworks,

Those fireworks that brought us together,

Those fireworks that I gifted him during his birthday,

Those fireworks that were just like love, 

Uncontainable, exploding in millions of lights and sensations,

Those fireworks that were pretty, but never as pretty as him,

Those fireworks that became unforgettable, 

Those fireworks that our hearts waited so much to see.

Those fireworks that now represent us,

Our love,

Our feelings,

All the passion we shared,

Our adoration, affection and care towards the other…

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 7

“     Those fireworks that now represent YOU.

That’s how me and your dad met.”

[girlivealwaysbean]

wanting to text your ex when you're sad is so real

[boba-beom]

❥ ҉ TXT FINALLY MEETING YOU WHILE IN A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP HEADCANONS

✧ pairings: Yeonjun x reader, Soobin x reader, Taehyun x reader

✧ genre: romance, fluff, non-idol au, established relationships

✧ warning(s): none!

✧ wc: 831

✧ synopsis: you’re in a long distance relationship with txt and finally you get to see them again, but some kept it as a surprise in many different ways.

✧ a/n: my friend prev @/choideluxe (deactivated) wrote this which we made as a collab, but here is their part of txt's ldr headcanons! I hope you enjoy <3

you can read beomgyu and hueningkai's part here!

Soobin

He won't say anything at all

Soobin will try to keep it as a secret as much as possible because he doesn't want to spoil the surprise, after all he prepared so much for it

He'll book his ticket in advance and would plan things out ahead before he forgets

"Hey, I have a surprise for you soon!"

He's quite discreet about the whole thing, you won't catch him slipping at all

However, once it's the day he'll leave to see you, then he'll tell you to go fetch something there at the airport

It's obvious but he'll still tell you it's his friend who's going to be studying there, but no!

Soobin would run up to you with the biggest smile on his face, wrapping his arms around you, laughing and telling you how long he wanted this to happen

"I'm so excited to spend time with you again."

You would be too shocked to say anything, you had your hunch but you didn't really expect to see him and hold him like this again

There are two options, he will either spin you around like what he'd seen in movies or just stand there holding you with a dorky smile

"Now, did you like your surprise?" He asks and he will be waiting for you to say yes :(

It will take a while for Soobin to let you go and he'd be so talkative around you, he just missed you so much and to spend more time with you is something he's been waiting for

"Hey stupid, I love you" he would be so shocked hearing you say that but he will respond with "I love you too, stupid" with a goofy smile

Yeonjun

This man here would do everything

From the movies he'd seen of couples meeting in an airport, or the tactics he'd seen from it too

He'll plan it out himself and it's definitely something you'll see in a romcom movie

Yeonjun and you have this inside joke like, "where are you? come over." And he'd reply with, "if I can swim across the ocean, why not."

He tells you that he'd be sending you a gift instead of anything else, so any hints other than that there's nothing you can get

So one day you get a call from him, you're in the mood to make the joke because you miss him

"Can you come over, I miss you."

Yeonjun smiles, "maybe if you open the door I can come in."

So you open the door and see him standing there with his arms open wide, waiting for you to tackle him in a hug

"Where's my gift?"

He'd be like the audacity and it's obvious on his face, annoyed but amused

"I am the gift!" He'd be so annoyed I swear, "I flew all the way here just to spend more time and—"

Then you close the door on his face, laughing to yourself once you hear him banging on the door asking you to let him in so you open it again

But he'd easily get rid of that annoyance and you both would be in a laughing fit before tackling you inside with him

Taehyun

Taehyun would be obvious and at the same time wouldn't be obvious about this

He would drop some hints, they're random hints like pointing out a plane, mentioning travelling

But they don't make sense to you so you just go with it, and that's his exact plan. It's to redirect your attention to something else

But do know that he's really excited to see you again, he's so giddy and overly excited everyday

He counts down the days when he'll be able to travel, he has a gift for you in mind, and Taehyun dreams of you often because of it

Once you get the biggest hint like a text from him with "let's meet up" and he sends you a picture of the location; it's the airport

Once you two finally see each other, he almost cries and he barely tears up from things like this

Taehyun will hug you tightly and he will never let go of you for some time, he just misses you so much. He'll hold onto you for a good minute or two without speaking

He's clingy and he will be attached to you throughout your walk out of the airport with him, he has this big smile while doing so

Expect him to be so talkative, his eyes lighting up when he tells you about what he wants to do together with you

"Did you know, I've been planning this for a month?"

He would smile when you say absolutely had no idea, then that's when he knows he did a great job in keeping it a secret

"Maybe surprising you like this every time I visit doesn't sound too bad, right?"

He leans in to give you a soft kiss, smiling right after and gently holds your hand<3

[kill-the-rockstar]

August (Damiano David x Gender Neutral! Reader)

Summary: When Y/N booked an air BnB in Rotterdam to get away from the four walls they've been pacing for over a year, they didn't expect to meet a handsome Italian guy, and they deffinately didn't expect him to ask them out. But all good things must come to an end, right?

Folklore Masterlist

Warnings: angst, alcohol, self doubt, swearing

A/N: Okay, for this were going to ignore that Eurovision takes place in May and any potential language barriers caused by any of us knowing fuck all Italian! Have fun :)

Back when we were still changin' for the better

Wanting was enough

For me, it was enough

To live for the hope of it all

Cancel plans just in case you'd call

Y/N held their breath as the points were slowly read out. Time seemed to crawl at a snails pace as they sat on the edge of the bed in their rented room, waiting for Italy's points to be announced.

They were staying in Rotterdam for a month, wanting to experience something, anything, other than the four walls of their apartment back home after over a year of being locked down.

They hadn't expected to interact with anyone, let alone get a crush on the handsome boy, Damiano, who passed their balcony everyday.

And they especially hadn't expected him to start talking to them.

He'd first walked past around a week into their stay, and the first time he'd talked to them had been a casual joke about their staring that had made their face go red, he'd told them they looked cute flushed like that, and he'd have to try and make them blush as often as possible from then on, which led to the flirting every time they crossed paths, and the exchanging numbers and going out for socially distanced coffee and a 6ft apart dinner and-

So there they were, watching the Eurovision song contest on the edge of their seat, hoping he and his friends might win.

When their points were announced, and they'd received over 300 from the public, placing them at number 1, they shot up from their seat and jumped up and down before texting Damiano an 'OH MY GOD THIS IS AMAZING'.

And when Italy were confirmed to have won, they let out a noise that probably concerned their neighbours.

They watched the winning performance and smiled as Damiano kissed the guitarist, Thomas on live TV, but as the show finished, little insecurities started to settle in.

They'd been hearing Damiano talk about his friends and his music for days, and knew full well he deserved this win, but their brain was starting to buzz with thoughts of 'why hasn't he introduced you to his friends', 'will he even want you now he's won?' and 'It's over. He'll be leaving in two days and you'll never see him again'.

They managed to send a 'well done' text, on top of the still unread one from earlier, before collapsing back onto their bed with tears falling from their eyes as their brain turns against them.

They'd both been denying that eventually they'd both have to leave, trying to stay in the moment, but right now it was hitting hard that they may not even see him again before he left, what with all the celebrating the win and the hangover he was bound to have in the morning.

........

A few hours later, their stinging eyes were staring at their phone screen hopping from app to app, unable to settle on any distraction, or fall asleep, when they heard a loud knocking at the front door.

They crept towards it, checking through the peephole before opening it to a slightly (very) drunk Damiano.

He immediately grinned at them, stumbling slightly as he walked through the doorway and waited for Y/N to close the door before wrapping his arms around them from behind and hiding his face in their neck.

"hey... What are you doing here? I thought you'd be out partying until the sun comes up." Y/N asked gently, holding the hands that were wrapped around their waist and bringing one to their lips to kiss.

"We did a bit, but we're all pretty tired so we'll do it when we get back to Italy and can get all our friends 'round instead."

The mention of him leaving made the insecurities from before return, and they turned in his arms so they could see his face.

"If you're so tired why'd you come all the way here?"

"I wanted to see you," He smirked a little, "wanted you to tell me how cool the show was tonight."

"It was pretty cool..." they nodded, "I'm really proud of you, I know how badly you wanted to win. It was great to watch." They smiled and looked down to avoid his gaze.

"I wish you could've been there." he said after a minute, a lot quieter than before. "I'd have loved to see you in the crowd."

"yeah?"

"yeah."

They both stayed quiet for a moment, taking in the closeness.

Y/N started wondering how they were going to wind up sleeping. Would he stay over? Would he sleep in their bed? Would he leave? Would he come back if he did?

"I'm gonna miss you." he said, and their eyes met, and they could see how much he meant it. "I'll miss you so badly. And I don't know what to do about it."

"Neither do I," they responded quietly, tucking some of his hair behind his ear, before taking his face in their hand, thumb running across his cheekbone, "but tonight we don't have to worry do we? Tonight is for celebrating, and if it's meant to be, it will be, right?"

"We can only hope" he said before placing a kiss on their lips.

........

Seven months, countless texts and facetimes, a zoom call where Y/N met the rest of the band and quite a few flights later, Damiano got to see Y/N in the crowd of a show at last.

Got to hug them for the first time in seven months of promises and shitty WiFi on video chats, and this time neither of them needed to worry about the other having to leave.

[jakesimfromstatefarm]

not jealous | jake sim

summary: jake sim is not a jealous person. at least that's what he tells himself. so why does he find himself going through your phone when a certain "bluejay park" decides to text you?

pairing: jake sim x y/n [ft. mentions of jay park]

genre: angst, fluff 

warnings: angst, cursing (very minimal), one slightly suggestive sentence, jake being cute, some more angst lol, slightly cheesy bc jake’s just too cute ugh

wc: 3.8k

a/n: ok i loved writing this, which is why i went on to almost 4k words LOL oops. but anyways, i love jake a little too much and this type of scenario has been running around in my head for a while now so i decided to put it into words. also i may have created this blog just so i could post this somewhere LMAO anyways yeah this was my first fic so hope you guys enjoyyyy <3

Jake Sim is not a jealous person.

At least that's what he tells himself. To be fair, in his past relationships, he never showed any jealously. Then again, he doesn't know if he can call those relationships, "relationships". Does a fifth grade relationship with a girl who he was once dared to kiss during a game of Truth or Dare in the basement of a classmate's house during their 11th birthday party count? He doesn't remember being jealous when the same girl was later dared to kiss his classmate, Sunghoon. (Funny enough, that's how the two boys came to be best friends 'til this day, but that's a story for another time.) 

But really, Jake doesn't think jealously is one of his traits, even if he's now almost 20 years old without any experience with love other than his current relationship with you and that short-lived romance in the fifth grade. (What was her name again? Jake would have to ask Sunghoon later.)

So he doesn't know what clicked in that brain of his that lead him to this current situation he was in. He doesn't know why he felt a little spark of anger in him when your phone, which you left right next to him on the couch while you went to take a shower, kept buzzing with texts from "bluejay park". He doesn't know why he couldn't kept his eyes distracted from the messages, although your phone was constantly lighting up because whatever it was Jay had to say to you, he would not shut up about it. He doesn't know why he questioned what your relationship with Jay was for a split second.

In fact, you're close with all of Jake's friends. That's one of his favorite things about you, you get along so well with all his friends you might as well replace Jake himself in the friend group. So he doesn't know what tells him to take a little glance at your phone—at the messages.

But he finds himself doing it anyways.

Hearing that the water in the shower was still running (you were always the type to take long showers), he quickly grabs your phone and scrolls through the lock screen just to find that he couldn't even read the messages since you had your notifications set so no one could read them unless the phone was unlocked (darn you and your settings!) Thankfully, Jake knew your passcode––and you knew his too––or he thought he did. Until the iPhone vibrated, telling him the passcode was wrong.

He must've entered it too fast or something. So he tries again.

And again.

And again.

Until the iPhone switches its screen to say: "iPhone is disabled. Try again in 5 minutes."

There's no way. You never change your password. And even if you did, you would tell him—you two even had each other's fingerprints saved into each other's phones in the past (you know, before the world decided that Apple's home button was too lame and decided to just completely get rid of it). If there was an option to save multiple faces for Face ID, you two would be that couple that saved each others faces in your own phones.

That being said, Jake sat there, your phone in hand, frozen. Why was your phone locked? Why was Jay texting you 10 texts per second? Why did he feel guilty about this entire situation?

He hears the shower switch off and in that moment, he swears he feels his heart beat just a little faster. He tells himself there's no way you'll be out before the 5 minutes are up. You followed a really meticulous skincare routine (one that Jake memorized by now) that took an extra 15 minutes of your time after each shower.

"Hey Jake?" Your voice calls out from the tiny bathroom door crack that you left open before you hopped in the shower, "Is my phone out there? Do you mind bringing it to me?"

Fuck.

Jake shifts on the couch. Taps his foot on the ground. Returns your phone to its original spot. Clears his throat.

"Don't you want to get dressed first?" he calls back, quite timidly.

He can hear you stop moving around in the bathroom. Probably telling yourself what an odd response that was. To be fair, it was an odd question, considering the fact that you two have been together for so long, it’s not like he hasn’t seen you undressed before...intentionally or not. 

Next thing he knows, the steam is rolling out of the bathroom door and you're stepping out in your towel, eyebrows raised.

"If you didn't want to get up from the couch, you could've just said so, you lazy butt," you smirk at him as you walk towards him and the couch, leaving a faint trail of water drops behind you. Jake's eyes follow your figure as you go to grab your phone and lift the screen towards yourself.

That's when he freezes. You do too.

You cock your head, as if asking yourself why it was disabled. He can hear the gears in your head turning.

"Jake, did you try to unlock my phone?"

He runs through all the possible excuses he could blurt out. Come on Jake, think of something! But he knows he can't lie to you.

Too many beats of silence pass by.

"Maybe," he finally says—or more like murmurs. He looks up to you like a child looking up at their mom, who just them caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. To his surprise, you don't show any hint of anger. A flash of confusion—and is that worry he sees?—crosses your face for a split second before you shrug and turn towards your room to change, dropping the subject. It was natural for you two to use each other's phones anyways. So then why did you have that look of worry?

Jake knows you well, a little too well. But that's what you love about him. He can easily read all your emotions. One of the many things he picked up from dating you for almost two years now. But why would you care if he tried to get into your phone? Why would that worry you? All the possibilities run through head and his own worry begins to increase. He trusts you. He does.

So then why does the thought bother him throughout the entire day? Why does he bring it up during dinner later that night, when you're both cuddled on your sofa, slurping take-out ramen while rewatching your favorite k-drama under the thick blanket that you always keep in your living room for nights like these?

"Huh? Of course I've heard from Jay today, we had that conversation about that stupid meme you boys kept laughing about in the groupchat we're all in, didn't we?" You answer him when he asks if you've heard from Jay lately. You sit up from your warm spot under Jake's arm to put your empty bowl on the coffee table in front of you. When you lean back, you look up at him,

"Why do you ask?"

"Oh, it's nothing, just wondering," he says, avoiding your eyes by keeping his own trained on the series currently playing on your TV. This would be your third time rewatching this series together. He would never complain to you though, he knows how much you love it and if he were being honest, he was secretly attached to the characters—not that he would ever tell you, he would never hear the end of it from you and the boys.

"You're being weird. Just tell me, or did you forget that I can practically read your mind," you say with a giggle and shove to his side, the one you were currently warmly cuddled into. Jake wasn't the only one who learned how to read emotions; you could read him just as well as he could read you. And like you, that's one of the many things he loved about you. But maybe not in this case.

He toyed around with the contents inside his ramen bowl with his chopsticks.

"I just..." God, how does he word this? Why was he having trouble explaining it? You were the easiest person to talk to. To him, you were the only person he could tell everything to.

"Jaywastextingyouabunchearlier," he blurts out quickly, but not quickly enough for you to miss it.

He feels you shift under his arm. He feels the air in the room shift. Tension.

"What?" Now you're sitting upright, legs criss-crossed in front of you on the couch but turned, so your body is completely facing him. He mirrors you, sitting up to put his ramen bowl next to yours on the surface, but he stays facing the TV.

"Your phone kept going off because of him when you were showering," he says with a little more confidence. But inside, he was nervous as hell, the same nervous as when he asked you out for the first time many moons ago. But it's too late to back out now, he brought it up first, anyways. Guess we're having this conversation now, good going Jake!

"Is that why you tried unlocking my phone earlier? I mean I thought you were just trying to leave selfies on my phone like you always do but you were trying to read my texts?" You question, slightly raising your soft voice. He doesn't know how to react, he hates confrontation.

"It wasn't like that, Jay just kept spamming you and like I—why was he even texting you in the first place? Then your phone got disabled because you changed your password, which you never do by the way, so I–"

"I changed it because my little sister kept getting into my phone when I went to visit my family yesterday! Did you really think I was hiding something from you? You know I can text whoever I want, right? You don't own me."

Okay so now he's managed to make you angry. Good going Jake, part 2!

"Okay but what does Jay need from you so bad that he has to send you like 50 messages at once?" He's standing now. So are you, eyebrows furrowed together as you collect your bowls from the table.

Standing there, bowls in hand, you say, "Jake, that's none of your business! It wasn't even that big of a deal, I don't know why you felt the need to nosy around."

"Well, if he's texting you non-stop, then obviously it's a big deal! We wouldn't even be having this conversation if you would just tell me what you guys were talking about," he murmurs back, eyes narrowing. You scoff as you trail into your kitchen. He follows behind and stops at the other side at your kitchen island as you place the dirty dishes into the sink.

"No, we're having this conversation because you obviously don't trust me! It doesn't matter what we were talking about, it doesn't matter who I was texting! I could be texting your mother and I shouldn't have to tell you what we were talking about! That's why we're having this conversation," you say as you turn back to face him from the other end.

He hates this. He hates fighting with you (which is a very, very rare occasion). He hates that you think he doesn't trust you. He hates his insecurity eating at him, telling him to keep questioning you on why you and Jay were talking in the first place. He was aware that you were close with his friends, but it wasn't until the texts he realized just how close you are with them. It's not that he didn't trust you, he just didn't know how to act when it came to you and other guys. God knows how he got lucky enough to meet you, let alone date you, so the thought of him losing you to someone else actually terrified him. Not only were you his first real relationship, but he wanted you to be his first and only one in life. You were it for him.

"Why did he text you." He deadpans from his side of the kitchen.

You scoff with a hint of exasperation. "You're kidding me."

You stare at him. He stares back, quirking an eyebrow, as if restating the same question back, as if testing you.

You're fuming now. Why was he making it so hard? Why was he doubting you? Out of frustration, you start laughing, which scares him. That can't be good.

"Fine. You wanna know so bad? Take a look,"  you're one tone level away from screaming as you take your phone out of your pocket, unlock it, and open up your conversation with "bluejay park", sliding the phone across the island to reach him.

Jake stares at the phone which now lies there, unlocked, facing him. Isn't this what he wanted? It is, right? That's why he started this dreaded argument with you in the first place.

Then why does he feel so fucking awful?

He looks back up at you, to see you sighing and looking up at the ceiling, as if trying to force your forming tears back into your eyes.

Yup, he feels horrible.

"Happy? Happy to know we were just trying to plan a surprise birthday party for you but you and your jealously just had to know huh, Jake?" You quickly state, voice cracking, as you tried not to choke up. You weren't sad that he found out about the surprise. You were sad that it felt like he didn't trust you. That he thought you were the type of person to do god knows what behind his back. You hated the feeling of not being trusted. Especially by Jake, of all people.

"Fuck."

Jake's face (and heart) falls with the most broken expression you've ever seen. But you're too sad, angry, tired (a mix of all?) to care. Your only goal right now is to not let him see you cry.

You hurry past him, across your apartment, and into your bedroom, slamming the door behind you, leaving behind a shocked, and regretful, Jake.

His heart shrinks when he hears the door slam shut and a little more when he looks down at the still unlocked phone in front of him. He didn't have the heart in him to look at it anymore. Of course he trusted you, he knew what you said was the truth.

He mentally screams at himself for assuming the worst––for thinking that you, a literal angel, would betray him.  First, he thought he was losing you to someone else. Now, he was afraid he just lost you through his own actions. 

He hesitantly sulks over to your door, softly knocking when he reaches it.

"Y/N?"

No response.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry. I didn't know, I let my—”

"Jake just please leave me alone for now," he hears you painfully say from a distance, meaning you're on your bed. He knows the door's unlocked—the lock on your door hasn't been working for a long time now, despite the many times he tells you to talk to your landlord about it. But he doesn't find it in him to open it. He knows he messed up. If he saw you in there right now, crying, he wouldn't know what to do. He wouldn't know what he would to do himself, knowing he was the reason behind your tears.

He nods in silence, knowing you can't see him, but does so anyways and returns to his spot on the couch. He could leave right now, go back to the dorm with the rest of the guys, let you have your space like you wanted. But his heart hurts at the idea of leaving you sad, angry, or a combination of both. He can't leave this unresolved. He fucked up, he has to fix it.

And so he sits on your couch for another hour. The clock on the wall behind him continues to tick as the silent tension in your apartment continues to grow. When it hits 11pm and he's sure you've slumbered off into sleep, he quietly enters your room.

He can see your figure in the dark, your back facing the door as you're curled up into yourself under the comforter. He feels his heart drop a little more when he imagines you crying in that position from earlier. He slowly peels the comforter open and gets into his side of the bed, careful not to bother your sleeping figure.

Laying there, staring up at the ceiling, he's never felt more like a stranger in your bed. It's not that he hasn't slept over before, god knows he's probably slept over at your place more than he has in his own bed. But right now, in this moment, he just felt awful. Like he didn't deserve to be in such close proximity to you. How could he be deserving? He violated your privacy, made you feel like you weren't trusted, doubted your relationship.

These thoughts run through Jake's head as he stares up at your ceiling fan, wishing he could turn back time to a few hours ago, before he checked your phone, before he let his insecurities get to the best of him.

You can feel the dip he makes in the bed behind you when he gets in. Of course you're not asleep. There's no way sleep could reach you when you had the recent events constantly replaying in your head like a broken record.

You knew Jake with all your heart. You didn't have to look at him to know he was probably laying there, hurt, staring up at the ceiling, drafting what to say once you wake up—or once he knows you're actually still awake.

You decide to break the tension by turning to lay on your other side, facing him.

You were wrong. Thanks to the little sliver of moonlight shining through your sheer curtains, you can see him, now laying on his side, already looking at you with so much regret in his eyes. You can almost hear the cracks in your heart physically forming.

His eyes widen when he realizes you're still awake. He opens his mouth to say something, but not before you quickly shift over to his side of the bed and embrace him in a tight hold, burying your face into his chest. Without any hesitation, he returns the gesture, arms holding your body as close to him as possible. As if once he let go, he'd lose you forever.

He lets out a sigh of relief as he breathes you in. He didn't even know he was holding his breath all this time.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry Y/N," he mutters into your hair. He feels his hoodie getting wet from where you buried your face. He pulls you closer, if that's even possible, feeling his own eyes heating up with sadness. He would never forgive himself for making you feel this way.

"You know I trust you right? Please know that. I shouldn't have assumed the worst when I saw your phone. I...I let my insecurities get to the best of me."

You move your head from its home on his chest to look up at him, as if asking him to elaborate. This was new to you, you didn't know he held insecurities in your relationship. But it wasn't because of you, no, you were his entire world. Losing you meant losing everything.

Jake's never been the best at saying his feelings. That's why it took him so long (with the help of his six best friends) to finally confess how he felt about you. He was afraid of letting people in if they could easily walk out. Maybe that's why he never let anyone into his life before you. But oh, were you an exception. The second he met you, he knew he was fucked. But thank god he did, because thanks to you, he's been able to be more open, more vulnerable. He's able to talk to you about anything and everything. He doesn't have that same fear of losing people anymore, not when he has you in his life to reassure him every step of the way. But right now, in this moment, he doesn't know how to tell you that his new fear was, in fact, just losing you.

The sheer idea of you not being a part of his life anymore terrified him. 

"I hope you know you're never going to lose me Jake, if that's what you're insecure about," you softly mutter as you wrap your free arm that's not stuck in between both your bodies around him to gently play with the ends of his hair. It's as if you could read his mind, he loves that you know him so well.

"It just sucks that you could even think I would ever do something as awful as what you were assuming...with one of your closest friends nonetheless," you continue.

"I know. I know, and I feel terrible. I'm so sorry. I know you would never do anything remotely close to that, and I know you would never intentionally try to keep anything from me," he sighs. He shifts so he can lie down on his back, bringing you with him to lie on his chest, never letting you go once. "It's just...I just don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you Y/N. Everyday, I ask myself what heroic thing I must've done in my past life to deserve this life with you and I can't help but think you could just as easily be stripped away from me."

As much as your heart breaks listening to him rant, you feel your love for him grow even more. You knew how hard it was for him to put his true emotions into words, and him telling you this reminded you how much trust he had in you.

After some moments of silence, moments of him drawing random shapes onto your back, moments of you two just holding each other like it was the end of the world, you speak up.

"I love you. I'm sorry for making you doubt yourself—"

"No, it's not your fault, I can't help but think things like that. I just don't know what I did to deserve you, and I know that I need to be mo–"

"Babe let me finish," you say with a little giggle in your tone. He immediately stops and mutters a little "sorry". How cute, you tell yourself.

"I was gonna say," you look back up at him so you're making direct eye contact now. "You're the only one that's ever on my mind, Jake. I can't help the way you think, but I can assure you that there is no one else I would rather be with. And I mean that for the rest of life."

You snuggle back into the comfortable hoodie he's currently wearing (you make a mental note to yourself to steal it from him later) and decide to ease the tension,

"So you're stuck with me for life, sorry to inform you Mr. Sim."

Jake lets out a laugh, looking down at you to see you returning his smile with a cheeky one.

"I love you. So much," he says so sincerely, so genuinely, that you almost tear up again from how content you were. Now you were asking yourself, what did you do to deserve him?

Jake Sim is not a jealous person.

No, he just loves you.

A lot.

[cr0wbonezz-wr1ting-inc]

One more time

Summary: Alex regrets ever saying yes. All he wants is a second chance.

Trigger warning: Mentions of cheating, mentions of sex, swearing, angst

Author's note: my first piece off hiatus !! - you're a twitch streamer in this fic but it won't come up too much :) hope u like it <3

Based on: Break My Heart Again - FINNEAS

you sigh. your ex-boyfriend called again. you've been ignoring your phone for 5 minutes now. was he really this desperate?

you pick up your phone and slide the green button.

"what do you want, alex?"

"___, you picked up!"

he sounded extremely relieved, like he needs you to breathe.

"i did, now what do you want?"

alex sighed and leaned on a wall in his bedroom.

"can i come over? there's some stuff i still need to pick up."

you suck in a breath sharply. the air is thick and tense.

"no."

you clench the phone you were holding and bit your lip.

"i don't want to see you right now."

alex closed his eyes and pushed himself off the wall.

"i understand, you need time."

there was silence for a moment. neither of you wanted to say anything.

"if you want to come over that bad you can get your things tomorrow morning."

"sounds good. i'll be there around 11, okay?"

"fine."

"good-"

you ended the call.

"-bye..."

alex let his arm drop beside him. his eyes were watering, but he wiped it away with the sleeve of his hoodie.

it's his fault, he knew. but why is he still so upset? he shouldn't feel like this - it's is his own doing, after all.

~

you open the door to your home. alex was standing on the porch with a few empty bags in hand. the morning sun blinded you slightly, making you squint at the man in front of you.

"hi ___."

"hello, alex. all your belongings are on the couch.

"great, thank you."

~

he looks over as he's folding a shirt.

"what are you looking at?"

you say without looking away from your laptop.

his face was getting red slightly from embarrassment.

"nothing, you seem busy."

alex directed his eyes back to the clothes in front of him.

"otherwise you would've said something about me."

alex snickered slightly, trying to lighten the mood.

you sigh, holding your face in one of your hands.

don't say it. ___, keep it in. there's no point in fighting him. ___-

"if i wanted to make a comment it'd be about the fact you can't keep your dick in your pants."

god damn it, why did you do that?

he fell quiet. you hated his guts, but even you felt kind of bad for being so blunt with it.

a part of you still loved him. his loud, yet charming laugh. his sweet kisses. his adorable clinginess. his blushing face when you teased him.

you shake your head, trying to physically get rid of your pity for him. he doesn't love you anymore. he shouldn't, and neither should you.

~

after filling the bags with alex's belongings he stood up and wiped his forehead. you waver from your work and look him up and down.

"you done?"

you asked him. he turned around and gave you a weak smile.

"yeah, i think so."

"good, you know the way out."

you turn back to your computer.

"___, wait. can i ask you something?"

you make eye contact with him, fully aware it makes him nervous.

"what do you want?"

alex took a quick breath.

"can we talk sometime?"

you look at him like he spoke an alien tongue.

"why the hell would i?"

"i want to talk about what happened between us. i hate that our relationship is so sour."

he set a step forward.

"i just want this to end peaceful - or at least neutral."

"why the fuck would i want to be peaceful with you of all people?"

"i hate ending things on the wrong foot, you know that."

alex stands his ground, making you livid.

"then we make up, and then what? you'll just break my heart again!"

you stand up, simultaneously pushing the chair away with your legs.

"then i can lay awake and think about why i even let you inside my house again in the first place?!"

if looks could kill, alex would be on the floor.

"fine. if you don't want to, then i guess everything will just stay the way it is."

alex turned around and grabbed his bags. there's no way he's getting through to you right now.

"oh, so now it's my fault?"

you slam your laptop and walk away from the table.

"well, i'm so sorry for being angry at you for cheating on me!"

you don't hold your anger in anymore, he crossed the line.

"i never said that, ___!"

alex yelled to match your energy.

you took a step back. the audacity to yell at you in your house.

"out. now."

alex grabbed the second bag of clothes and without a word walked to the front door.

"goodbye, ___."

alex pushes the door open and steps outside. you go after him but stop at the doorstep.

"fuck you!" you sob out. you grab the doorknob and slam the door shut.

your knees slowly got weaker and you sit against the front door, shutting your eyes.

~

it's been a month since you've seen alex. you've blocked him on everything since then.

you were doing a q&a on your twitch channel and everything was going well. chat was filled with questions and you answered the one's you could.

your thoughts were somewhere else, though.

you still miss him, you really did. alex used to watch your streams all the time. he sent you donations with cheesy pick-up lines, he called you during streams to make fun of you for dying in a game or just to chat while he's bored.

but that didn't happen anymore.

you realize you haven't said anything in a while and you apologize. your chat was spamming purple hearts and 'are you okay?'

"ah, sorry everyone, i'm still tired from yesterday. i think i'm going to end the stream for today, thank you all for coming!"

after saying goodbye you turn off your computer.

why are you still so obsessed over him?! he cheated on you! he even tried to cover it up with a bullshit story about "not being the first to kiss her," and "she forced me to," like someone would believe a lie like that.

yet, you still love him. something inside you wants to believe him, like he really was telling the truth.

~

the next morning you open twitter and scroll for a bit. you made a tweet earlier in which you stated you weren't going to stream today.

you looked at the trending topics and saw your name in bold letters. you clicked on it and read the first tweet that popped up.

'i really hope ___ is doing better, they looked so sad on stream :('

an image was attached to it - a screenshot from the stream you did yesterday where you were mindlessly staring at your computer screen.

you sighed. at least they're not thinking too deep about this.

you scroll further down, replying and liking a couple tweets saying you were alright, thanking them or cracking a joke. this should keep them off your back for a while.

after scrolling for a bit one tweet catches your eye. you clutch your phone as you read the comment.

'kinda obvious they miss quackity :/ it's a good cover-up story tho '

~

alex was staring at his ceiling. he'd seen the tweets about you - about him.

he hates this feeling. he hates the fact that he knows what you're thinking. he hates that he knows it's his fault. he didn't mean to. he didn't.

"come on, alex. you know you want it." the woman said.

"i told you, no! i have a partner!" alex pushed her away for the second time, trying to find a way past the girl and out of this small alleyway. he should've never gone to this stupid bar.

"tch, whatever. but know you'll regret rejecting someone like me!" the girl pushed him to the brick wall and fixed her dress as she walked away.

alex fixed himself for a minute and walked past the bar and into his car. he pulled out his phone and shot you a quick text.

'hey bb i'll be over in a few :)'

'don't come back.'

you responded almost immediately. alex froze as he looked at the screen.

'wdym?'

'you know damn well why'

you sent him a photo of him next to the bar in the alley. the girl was all over him while her lips connected lustfully to his.

'it isn't what it looks like, i didn't start any of this!'

you don't respond. alex tries to send you another text when an error pops up.

'unable to send message. user has blocked you.'

~

you hover your hand over your phone's keyboard. you thought anbout alex's offer to talk, and decided that maybe it was a good idea after all. you couldn't get your mind off him, you thought that hopefully getting some closure could help.

but how were you going to ask him? 'hey, i know i blocked number like a month ago but can you to meet me at some random park? see you there!'

after typing and deleting multiple texts you eventually landed on a message.

'hey alex, i've been thinking about your offer to talk it out, and i wanted to ask if you're still up for it?'

you send it and immediately turn off your phone and place it on the coffeetable in front of you. you did it, finally. you fall back on your couch and pull your knees up to your face, waiting for a notification.

after a nailbiting five minutes a light emits from your phone. you pick it up and read the name calling you. 'alex'. you take a deep breath and answer the phone.

"hi alex."

"hey ___, it's been a while."

you sit up straight, preparing yourself for the conversation you're about to have.

'yeah, you can say that."

the atmosphere was a lot less tense than you expected. it was weirdly... comforting? you can hear alex's raspy voice through the phone. has he been crying?

"i saw your text, you wanted to meet?"

"yes, i did. i wanted to get some closure, at least."

alex chuckled, his laugh making you a little flustered. trying to brush it off, you laugh with him.

"what's so funny?" alex asked.

you rolled your eyes and smile.

"you, dumbass."

he gasps cartoonishly loud. his goofy personality is something you could never get enough of. maybe you were wrong after all.

"ok, but seriously, when do you want to meet?"

he gets back on topic. you snap out of your smile and remember why he called in the first place.

"right, right. i'm free this whole week, you can choose when."

after some planning and back and forth, you decide to meet at a small family-run café in the afternoon. coincidentally, it's the same place you two had your first date.

~

you settle down at a table on the terrace of the café, the sunday sun greeting you warmly. you were a little early, so you decided to think of some questions. it didn't take you long to come to a few, though. your main question was the photo. what was that all about?

as you were handed a menu you saw alex walking on the pavement fidgeting with his fingers.

"hey! sorry if i'm late, i took the bus instead of my car."

he took the seat parallel to yours and exhaled.

"oh no, you're right on time. i was just a little early."

the waitress gave alex a menu and disappeared into the establishment. you both decided to stay quiet before getting on topic. neither of you want to start the conversation.

after both ordering and having surface level conversation for a while silence fell. you both know why you're here, it feels off to talk like nothing ever happened.

"okay-"

"so-"

you both start at the same time. alex awkwardly chuckles while covering his mouth.

"you first."

alex proposes. you nod and like magic lose the somewhat content mood you had prior. you steadily breathe in and pull out your phone.

"so, first things first; my main goal is to get closure and an explanation - there's no point in lying to me."

alex hums in agreement. you could tell he was nervous, you knew him better than anyone. you tap on your screen a few times until you reach the photo that was sent to you.

"now, i want a clear answer. what happened that night?"

you ask him firmly as you put your phone on the table to reveal the image.

"that's my ex-girlfriend."

alex said. you raise an eyebrow - his ex? you've heard some wild things about her and her antics, which is exactly why alex broke up with her in the first place.

"she said she wanted to ask me something in private. my dumbass said yes, because i can't pick up on context clues, apparently."

you cross your arms and lean back on the chair.

"you got that right."

alex looks up from the photo and makes eye contact with you.

"long story short, she pushed me to the wall and kissed me. i tried to push her off but she didn't let me go. after shoving her, like, twice she finally got the hint and left."

~

"so she set you up?"

"she hasn't changed a bit since all those years."

you say with a hint of condescension. his explanation made sense, and from what you heard he wasn't lying. your gut told you to believe him, yet your mind had an itching feeling that there was something else.

"are you sure that's all?"

alex flinched slightly.

"y-yes, ___. i don't know what else to tell you."

you mess with your hair a bit, clearly conflicted. there was nothing else, you knew that. but your brain wouldn't let it go. you decided it's better if you just sleep on it.

"alright, then.-"

you grab your bag and stand up.

"-i think we're done here."

alex stays seated and looks up at you.

"yeah, i think so."

you pick the phone up that's laying on the table. you pull out your wallet and put a $5 bill under your teacup.

"goodbye, alex."

"wait!"

alex stands up and grabs your wrist, the gesture scaring you little bit.

"are you still mad at me?"

those eyes. they're so pretty, almost sparlking. you snap out of it when he lets go, just realizing how weird it is to grab someone's arm out of nowhere.

"sorry, my bad. i wasn't thinking."

alex scratches the back of his neck.

"i'm still deciding if i can trust you, but i appreciate you showing up, at least."

"that's enough for me."

alex smile at you, not trying to pry.

"goodbye, ___."

"goodbye, alex."

~

you heard the chirping of the birds outside your window and groan. why is it already morning? you sit up and grab your phone from the nightstand next to your bed, the phone reading 11:23 - tuesday - xx-xx-xxxx.

you sigh and fall back onto your bed. you've been thinking about alex for a few days now, still not getting him out of your head.

after going downstairs and eating some toast you pull out your phone again, the clock now reading 12:44. you look through your contacts and eventually land on his name.

you hover your hand over the green pixels while sitting down at the dining table. you swallow audibly and click the call button.

it goes once.

it goes twice.

"___?"

'Hey alex, i wanted to ask you if you wanted to meet up again?"

ty for reading <3

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