#and his song was fun even though i keep thinking about the class of 3000 song

[bmpmp3]

a bit of a mild milgram fan (i adore the music and music videos but i still havent checked out a lot of the dramas but i still vote because i like being involved LOL) and i feel like giving my unsolicited opinions on season 2 so far. even though it makes perfect sense based off what i see from the fanbase that Futa was voted innocent BUT as someone who was largely neutral but uninterested (aside from his awesome song) in his character in season 1, season 2 made me actually really REALLY like him but in particular way where i want to see that little twerp squirm so im SO sad no one else voted him guilty q-q i WANTED to see him suffer for the NARRATIVE

also I think Mu should be voted innocent because she slays

[dedeuteros]

i think about you sometimes !!

messing with my typing quirks b/c maybe it’ll be fun for you to figure out who this is , like a silly form of enrichment , but i do think about you and how you’ve introduced me to things before i see them again , sometimes years later ! i got a song on my recommended that you sent a link to before and i checked to see if you actually had and you did ! i got a silly video about spacehey too and i can’t find the message but i’m 99.9% sure you showed it to me ! i wonder about your mind and your art and your writing but lately i’ve rarely talked to anyone at all , so there’s the excuse for not reaching out . i’ve been going about just keeping to myself . i don’t know if we’ll ever talk again , but you’re in my thoughts .

i hope you’re doing well !!

if youre who i believe youve done an endearingly poor job of changing up your writing style but i respect the effort! this is an interesting way to reach out, feels rather like talking to a ghost. but i guess youre right that i could only respond to something so nonconfrontational. as is.

im doing the thing right now where i read a lot of one book and like to talk with a similar formality. (it doesnt come through well but it reads the same in my mind.) it's no less than a collective of 3000 pages of careful intricate slowburn of a god-on-earth emperor and his competent secretary. they work to reform the 99 generations of poor government, the emperor one day gets to be himself again. there's a beautiful drapery of court pleasantries and fealty as a guise for their deep feelings. not that i am sure i have so many feelings (though the book skirts a perfect line of the aroace spectrum i enjoy) but maybe you can see why myself, avoidant and indirect, can enjoy it.

im glad you are excited by things i share, and that i was right they might be something in your own radar! my dear maliha used to do that for me in middleschool and it always tickled me when something came back to me a year later.

i also wonder on the writing and art of yourself and the entire lot of our class. i miss very badly being able to glance to either side and see something internal laid out next to me. i dont do so much, except my smileys when i feel aggravated and my easy doodles in book margins. but i have plans to do some studies. your pieces which included ambient sound were among my favorites (assuming you are, of course, you)

i dont hang out with anyone except my coowrkers, except holidays when the full force of several social lives drains me. had to call out of work for how tired it made me. i hope that you do still have people you could hang out with even if you dont. and i am still gravely sorry i cannot so enthusiastically be. sometimes it is easier when you know for certain someone is not willing to peer into your heart and soul but instead just enjoy company. any more makes my head spin.

much love, whether ive guessed who or not, to you! from my writing and my art and my thoughts.once dear to me i do not at all forget, which i think i already told you.

[commander-hanji-zoe]

Do you have any headcanons on veterans x reader on quarantine lockdown headcanons. Baking, Reading, Exercising?

Ohhhh I have so many! Thank you for this ask ❤️ One of these days I’ll master the art of answering a head canon question quickly and with shorter answers. But today is not the day! There’s a few nsfw bits under the cut. This is over 3k words....how?? 

Mike 

Mike is fond of long lay-ins, it’s what he lives for at the weekend. He loves you so much and enjoys nothing more than being comfy and snuggly under a duvet with you. Eating breakfast, watching Netflix, just chilling and enjoying one another’s company. So during lock down there’s gonna be a lot of time in comfy PJ’s lazing around in bed.

Mike loves cooking and cooking shows! The two of you have a date night once a week where you cook together. You always light some candles, listen to jazz and have a glass of wine or two while cooking. One week you try making your own sushi, the next it’s Jamaican curry, then it’s pizza night! Trying new things is something you both love (both in and out of the bedroom *cough* more on that later. 

When restrictions are eased a little and you’re allowed to sit outside/drive for exercise, the two of you take a long countryside drive together and find a quiet secluded spot where you can sit and have a picnic and watch the clouds go by. 

I see Mike as a guitar kinda guy, so he’ll teach you if you don’t play and if you do, the two of you will enjoy spending some time writing songs together and playing along to your favourite rock and indie tunes. 

You enjoy watching live acoustic gigs and concerts which are being streamed by artists and comedians etc. Mike encourages you to get dressed up with him, you have drinks while watching and often end up dancing as if you were at a gig in person. 

Binge listening to podcasts together ‘The Magnus Archive,’ ‘Welcome to Nightvale’ and ‘MaMbBam’ being favourites. 

Star-gazing. Sitting outdoors at night, during the day the two of you will spend time in your garden but it’s night time you really enjoy it the most. Sitting outside on a blanket and with another over you, you make sure all the lights inside are turned off so you can enjoy watching the stars, moon, planets, satellites etc above you. You often have a glass of wine or a cocktail as you sit out there, sometimes you fall asleep in Mike’s arms so he’ll carry you up to bed. 

Finally Mike is very good at giving you personal space, while he loves taking up new hobbies with you and spending time doing things you love together, he also knows you both need your space. It makes the time you do spend together so much sweeter. 

Erwin

Even though you don’t need to go out to work, Erwin is still up early. When he wakes he showers and then prepares for the day by making you both a delicious breakfast. Think poached eggs, grapefruit, french toast, yoghurt and fruit etc. He likes listening to the radio over watching TV first thing in the morning so you have that on for a bit. 

You enjoy daily workouts together (with Saturday or Sunday off). Erwin takes them unsurprisingly seriously, however, he does make them fun. The two of you will have little competitions with one another and Erwin creates a workout playlist for you - it’s an eclectic mix and includes songs that you both end up singing along to. 

Erwin loves to play the Piano but due to his work he only usually touches it a few times a month if that. With lockdown he starts playing daily, there’s a few times when you wake up and he’s already practising - it really is beautiful. Sometimes if he knows you’re watching he may stop playing, or at least change what he’s playing to something you know so you can sing along or join in. If you’re quiet though you can stand in the door for 5-10 minutes without him realising and he’ll continue to play classical music. 

As well as the home workouts you try to go out once a week for a run, as much as Erwin just wants to get on he would never leave you behind if you’re struggling to keep up and will wait for you (he’s a gentleman after all). 

Canvas painting, sometimes Erwin struggles with getting out or showing his emotions, after doing virtual tours of art galleries online you suggest ordering a canvas, some acrylic paint and palette knives. It’s amazing the level of emotion you see pour out of yourself and Erwin onto the canvas, it’s incredibly therapeutic so you order more canvasses. 

The two of you really enjoy binge watching documentary shows - you know the second Tiger King came out Erwin was all over that. There’s this side to Erwin that not everyone gets to see, or at least when they do it’s very rare. But during lockdown you get to experience it more frequently, he really does have a great sense of human and likes to have fun. While he enjoys documentaries about WW2, science (Unabomber: in his own words is also on the list) things like Tiger King, Dark Tourist and Louis Theroux docs are also a guilty pleasure. 

The two of you will spend some evenings laying chess by candle light with a glass of whiskey. 

Levi 

I feel to say that you’ll be cleaning a lot is a little obvious and I actually think that for the most part Levi would prefer to crack on with that on his own - it gives him peace of mind and it’s something he has control over. He enjoys it 

Together however, expect DIY Projects or painting/decorating. There’s things the two of you have talked about doing for ages and never gotten round to, now you have the perfect excuse. From painting a feature wall in your living quarters to making a little step wooden step ladder for the garden that you can put potted plants on. The two of you use your time to get creative around the home.

Dancing - the form of fitness you decide to take up is dance. At first Levi scoffs at the idea but then when he realises what a work out it actually is and how much strength and flexibility is required for some of the tutorials you’re following, he’s game. The two of you end up choreographing a dance together - it’s super cute (and hot in places - oops) 

You’re the kind of couple others are jealous of because you just work so well together, spending the perfect amount of time doing things together and apart. 

Being a lover of tea, Levi decides to educate you on the many different types by subscribing to a ‘tea lovers’ subscription box. You take the time to sit with him and really enjoy each tea, just talking with no noise from the radio or TV.

Levi likes to put together tapas or cheese tasting boards, he chooses the food for the main, you put together a starter or dessert and pick the wine that goes with the flavours he’s mixing. Together it’s like a perfect harmony. You set the table, light candles, listen to jazz and it’s almost as if you’re at one of your favourite restaurants. 

Watching Horror movies, you’ve probably seen every horror movie on Netflix, Amazon Prime etc. which is available to stream come the end of lockdown. Horror was actually how you met, you were at the cinema to see ‘Hereditary’ and none of your friends wanted to come with you so you went alone. Levi and his friends (the other vets) were in the same screen and sat next to you. So now Levi is strangely sentimental about horror movies. There’s cuddling up under blankets in the living room and plenty of popcorn along with movie themed cocktails. 

Video calls to your friends, you do more of the talking but Levi sits by you throughout and occasionally joins in. He’s loathed to admit it but he really likes seeing everyone’s faces and hearing their voices. 

Moblit

Moblit has a large collection of puzzles, a few were completed when he was younger but a lot of them aren’t. He used to get frustrated with them but always wanted to finish them so he could frame them and put them up around the house. When lockdown happened you think it’s the perfect opportunity for the two of you to work on them together and help him out. Turns out it’s actually a lot of fun and a pretty good was

Baking! You both love the Great British Bake Off, before lock-down you were always talking about how you wanted to give the recipes a try but of course something else always came along. Now lockdown is the perfect excuse to order some ingredients online and get baking! The kitchen often looks like a mess, Moblit gets flour on his face and even in his hair? You don’t know how it happens but you have a lot of fun doing it and hey what you bake usually turns out pretty good. 

Subscribes to Disney+ the second it comes out - and the two of you binge watch your favourite Disney movies singing along to them (I get the impression Moblit would be a huge Hercules and Moana fan). 

Watching Avengers Infinity War together and later on in the evening he turns to you and just says, “I love you 3000.”

Bike rides through the countryside (as long as it’s close to home of course and you can stay safe!) 

You watch art shows together (like the still life drawing classes on TV or Grayson Perry’s art class). Shows which have been made specifically now for lockdown to help inspire people to take up new hobbies. Both of you are pretty inexperienced at art or drawing so you have a lot of fun watching the shows, following the instructions and seeing where your hand and pencil lead you. You both end up discovering your own unique style of drawing - this inevitably ends up doing a still life of one another (more on this later). 

Hange 

Hange really struggles with lockdown, it makes them feel pretty anxious and they hate not being able to be out and about exploring/doing their job/learning new things etc. So Hanji needs quite a bit of love and looking after, care packages for the two of you go a long way so you order nice things in the early days of lock down. Hanji’s eyes light up when you hand them what you’ve ordered. 

Loads of gaming, you both enjoying exploring other worlds along with fantasy so everything from World of Warcraft, Skyrim, The Outer Worlds, Outer Wilds to the Final Fantasy games, The Witcher and Assassin’s Creed are all up your street. Sometimes you play alone, sometimes you watch one another play while reading magazines. Often when playing WOW you play together and share a mount, heading into raids together and working as a team. It’s not as good as being outside and exploring the world for real but it’s pretty close. 

Loads of movie marathons with enough sweets to make you sick, especially the gummy kind like Haribo. 

Hange - Arguments over who loves who more, it’s usually in the middle of a TV show that you’ve been really invested in but now with the impending end of the world, it’s so easy to get distracted. The ‘arguments’ usually end up in pillow fights and just laying in one another’s arms in silence. 

Home made science experiments - yup, you knew this was coming. There’s so much you can try at home with simple house hold ingredients. Hange also orders kits online so you end up growing your own crystals (not the drug kind lol), making your own ‘volcano’, making slime, dying flowers etc. At first you rolled your eyes when Hanji suggested it but actually it turns out to be a lot of fun and it’s pretty interesting, so you end up learning something. Hanji also orders DIY Sweet kits which are as fun to make as they are to eat. 

When it comes to heading outside to clap for key workers the two of you are gonna be dressed up to make the children smile. You’ll be banging pots and pans or possibly have a kazoo or tambourine. 

Nanaba

There’s loads of Gardening, it’s something the two of you always liked but found you didn’t have the time you needed to commit to it as much as you’d have liked. 

Cuddling on the grass in your garden, rolling around enjoying the sunshine and sun-bathing side by side.

The work out of choice for the two of you is yoga. You light incense and some candles as well as listening to mediation music and just take some time out to be alone with your thoughts - together. You both agree that stretching really helps you especially where you’re working from home, it’s so easy to get back ache! 

The two of you love dancing 

Nanaba decides to take up quilting and crochet. It’s something her mother and elder sister taught her how to do but is practically a forgotten hobby. You help one another to remember the basics and decide to make a giant patchwork quilt for your sofa. You work on it together so that there’s a part of both of you in it, you take inspiration from your garden and the world around you, even though it’s a lot smaller than it was before. If either of you prick your finger the other is there to kiss it better.

Preparing relaxing baths for one another, you enjoy much of the bath on your own but sometimes the other will sit on the toilet and read aloud or just come in for a chat. Lockdown makes you more open with one another than you were before. 

Getting into bed early before the sun has set, you keep the curtains open so you can watch the sky turn orange. Plenty of time in bed means you have time to binge watch the latest TV shows and not feel guilty about it if you have work the next day.

Witchy things - tarot card readings, candle magic, little rituals in the garden and kitchen witch magic like making dandelion honey or moon spell cookies. 

Below are a few nsfw thoughts (I didn’t write many but a couple kept bouncing around in my mind).

Erwin - 

Sex first thing in the morning, the kind of lazy, sleepy sex that the two of you dream of having but never have time before work. Now, you do and Erwin intends to make the most of it. 

Also shower sex, sometimes this follows the sex in the morning so by the time you finish work you’re already feeling tired. Often it follows the workouts you do and it doesn’t take either of you long to cum seeing as watching one another get sweaty and flex muscles - the tension is unbelievable. 

If you get too distracted during the work day, either by Erwin or TV (or if you distract Erwin too much) they’ll be punishments in the form of spanking and rough sex from behind, hair pulling and all. It’s the first time you find yourself wanting to be punished. 

Levi 

Sex in spaces you’ve just cleaned, it’s sort of a punishment if you back-talk him as he’ll make you clean up afterwards. Secretly he loves dirtying the sheets, it’s almost like an ultimate fantasy for someone who is so clean and neat, but he really has to be in the right mood for that. 

Lockdown is a chance for the two of you to explore some of the sexual fantasies you’ve discussed but never tried from light bondage (to start) and role-play. 

Switching, in your relationship neither one of you is particularly the dominant or submissive one continuously, rather you enjoy switching, but when you are in the role you both take it seriously. Now you’re in lockdown and it’s easy to get bored, you both agree to really extent the roles on the day you’re both in the mood, you could lead Levi round on a leash and collar all afternoon and he won’t complain. 

Mike 

Checking in on you as you’re working and trying to convince you lunch break sex is definitely a thing that will help you concentrate on your important presentation in your afternoon video conference. But of course he leaves you a bit of a mess and without a minute to spare so you appear on camera looking like you’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards. 

With Mike there’s also a lot of time to get creative in the bedroom, you have longer in the evening to take your time exploring one another and discovering new positions you’d never have thought possible.

When lockdown goes on much longer than anticipated Mike decides to turn up the creativity a notch. A rather large unmarked parcel arrives containing a latex bed sheet and sex swing, so you know you’re not going to be getting a lot of sleep for a while. 

Moblit 

Kisses that last for hours, the kind that start innocently and slowly you find yourself getting worked up and wanting more but Moblit continues to tease with those kisses and will pretend he has no idea why you’re worked up. However he does go weak at the knees if you praise him so that’s usually the way to get what you want. 

The still life drawings of one another start off fully clothed and very quickly become nude studies. You can only take it seriously for so long before he pounces on you or you on him and it’s like ‘that’ scene from Titanic within minutes. 

Endless, almost excruciating foreplay. 

Hanji 

Has always liked to have fun in bedroom, with lockdown it’s more of an excuse to dress up and play around, I’m thinking teacher & student or Doctor/nurse & patient. Hanji really gets into the role. 

Science experiments continue to the bedroom, you decide to give the whole electro-stim thing a go. 

Also with the DIY sweet kits there’s also a little left, so popping candy, expanding foam candy and more are used to adorn your bodies - it doesn’t stay on long as the combination of candy and sex is too irresistible to leave alone. 

Nanaba 

Sex outdoors, your garden is pretty secluded. It was something you talked about doing a lot but always found your weekends were too busy with friends and others that you just never got round to it. There’s grass stains on your knees and your clothes and you’d both wear them with pride outside the house if you could.

Bath tub sex, even if it’s a little uncomfortable it’s so intimate and personal that you don’t care how much of a mess you make or how many bruises you end up with. Lockdown hits you both hard mentally and bath tub sex is a way of feeling better and cleansed. 

There’s also a chance for some sex magic which involves wax play, again, something new you’d thought about for a while and now you both just wanted something to make you feel alive. 

[every1studio]

SERIES: “stages of love: everything happens for a reason” [ateez: ???]

genre: FLUFF + ANGST + DRAMA + EXTRA EXTRA LONG

ficstyle: bulletpoints + series [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [END]

prompt: inspired by “I Love You 3000″ by Stephanie Poetri + “Lay Me Down” by Sam Smith/John Legend + “All In My Head” by Tori Kelly + “Should’ve Been Us” Tori Kelly + “Photograph” by Ed Sheeran + “Little Do You Know” by Alex & Sierra + “When I Was Your Man” by Bruno Mars 

note: THANK YOU FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT I GOT FROM THIS SERIES AND I HOPE YOU CAN SUPPORT MY FUTURE WORKS + PLEASE LISTEN TO THESE SONGS AS YOU READ THIS 

your life was finally starting to come together after that party

you cut Yunho away from your life as Wooyoung came into your life 

Wooyoung was the perfect boyfriend anyone could ever ask for 

although there were times you felt like you weren’t enough for him, he made you feel like you were the only one that mattered in the world

he was your curtain you could hide behind when you were nervous or shy 

and he was someone who hyped you up when you wanted to step out and be adventurous 

he knew your likes and dislikes but always gave you the chance to try something new 

little did you know, so did San 

San knew just about everything that Wooyoung knew about you 

but the only difference was, Wooyoung was the one holding your hand and he wasn’t 

San was quietly cleaning the cups as he watched you and Wooyoung having a lovey-dovey conversation on your break 

it was all of your last year of college; you still worked with San at his cafe, you also signed into a well-known music label as a producer by the end of your sophomore year and you had been dating Wooyoung since the party at the end of your freshman year

you told you only had small strokes of luck but you had been happy for a long time, you could hardly believe it 

Wooyoung caught you staring at him for too long as he was trying to explain to you his plan after college

he couldn’t help but burst into heart-shaped bubbles 

he gently pushes your forehead with his finger, “stop looking at me like that, or I’ll fall in love with you”

you pouted when he interrupted your daydreams with your future with him, “too bad..”

you leaned to squish his face, “you already are”

San couldn’t even look at the sight of you together; he was always “too busy” with the cafe to bother with you guys 

would check up on you and hear about all the perfect things about Wooyoung but since then, he hasn’t been too close with you

because he knew if he did, he would fall for you harder and harder 

San tried dating after you and Wooyoung became official 

he tried to forget about you that way

he tried to give his dates his undivided attention

but the moment he’d see your silhouette, he would fall for you all over again 

for a while, he kept his free time to a minimum to work at the cafe; so that would force him to keep some distance from you

he started to hire more people so that you could focus on school and spend least time with him

but every time you’d see him, you wanted to catch up and make plans with him

how could he say no?

“hey San!�� you called over to his table 

“what’s up?” he answered with his signature smile 

“Wooyoung was wondering if you wanted to go to the summer festival with us tonight!” Wooyoung nodded at your suggestion 

San massage the back of his neck, “I don’t know... it’s been pretty busy with the cafe and a lot of workers wanna go so I don’t have anyone to cover tonight’s shifts..”

you sulked at his answer and Wooyoung rubbed your hands to ensure that it was okay

“would you like us to help you out?” Wooyoung asked

San hated Wooyoung

he hated how nice he was 

he hated how well he treated you

he hated how he made you happy

but those were the reasons for your smiles

and he couldn’t hate your smiles

“it’s okay! you two go out and have fun.. if the festival is still going on by the time the shop closes, I’ll let you know,” San tried hard to give you a genuine smile, “besides.. I have a date so maybe we can do a double date..” 

he lied so that you wouldn’t suspect him of anything 

you got super excited to see your best friend go on a date and to have you see him in action got you excited 

Wooyoung smiled as he saw a resemblance between you and a puppy

“he said “maybe,” don’t get your hopes up too high” he laughed

Wooyoung got up, “well I gotta go head over to my last class of the day..”

you got over to his side to give him a kiss on the cheek, but he purposely move so that you’d kiss his lips instead

you blushed as you looked up at him

“see you later, cutie~” he blooped your nose 

“bye~” you softly mumbled 

he walked backwards as if he couldn’t get his eyes off of you until he made it to the door

he winked before he left the cafe and you could feel butterflies fill up your stomach 

even though you’ve been with him for basically four years now, he still made you feel like everyday was a first date 

just like that, you went back to work

you didn’t think about anything but going to the festival with Wooyoung 

San saw how giddy you were

“Y/N?”

the way your hair turned and fell back in place when you turned to his call

he wanted to kiss you right then and there but he shook that thought away

one would’ve that after four years, San’s attraction towards you would falter

but it never did, not once 

even after you dated Wooyoung, or dated other girls  

“you can leave early to get ready for tonight.. you have like 30 minutes of your shift left anyways..”

you ran up and hugged him, “you’re the best boss and bestest friend ever!”

you ruffled his hair and grabbed your bag, “see you later!!”

the bell of the door chimed as you dashed out

“yeah.. see you later...” 

you put on an outfit you were planning to wear along with the perfume Wooyoung got you for your one year anniversary 

you couldn’t hide your excitement 

you got a text from Wooyoung saying that he was outside waiting for you 

you were too excited you didn’t see Yunho as you past by him down the staircase 

since the party, Yunho hasn’t tried to talk to you 

the bags under his eyes sunk in and they were always there no matter how much rest he got 

he didn’t want to ruin your mood with him being around; so he did everything he could to stay clear out of your sight 

he constantly looks at the pictures he has of you; especially the one you knew you had the matching one of

but you had that picture frame faced down and replaced with one with Wooyoung

that night, he broke up with Aurora, he told her that she deserved someone that could love her for her and help her to become a better person

to his surprise, she agreed to the breakup and both of them parted ways

Yunho hasn’t dated since 

a lot as happen since then, he told Mingi about the incident during their late night calls

Mingi was so mad with him, he stopped talking to him for a straight month 

Mingi entrusted Yunho to you yet he let some other guy swept you off of your feet 

Mingi yelled at him; saying, that he worked so hard to move back to Korea for you, that he had you in his head while he was dealing his hard times at home, that he thought he was doing the right thing by making you “happy” and for what?

to have him fuck up; Mingi told Yunho that Yunho did make you happy at a point in time yet he was the one that took it away, of course you weren’t going to stay unhappy and miserable 

at that moment after you past Yunho, Mingi called, “I’m coming back to Korea. you better clean up your act and tell her.. it’s been 4 years, man. If you don’t do it, I will..”

Yunho ended the call and ran his cold fingers through his hair, “easier said than done...”

you saw Wooyoung was waiting by his car with a bouquet of sunflowers tied with a beautiful, black satin ribbon that matched your outfit

“you shouldn’t have...” you reached for them

but he pulled them back, “what if I just got them for myself and I wanted to show them off to you?”

you crossed your arms and exhaled as you walked past to the passenger side of the door 

he smiled through his rolled eyes as he wrapped his arms around to give you a back hug as he presented the bouquet

“you honestly can’t throw a little fit like that, princess.. I was just joking around~” 

you were suppose to be pouting; but you couldn’t throw his addicting scent of his go-to cologne through his tight embrace

you grabbed the flowers and turned around to loop your arms through him

“you can’t go all romantic on me like that or I’ll fall in love with you”

Wooyoung smirks as he pulls you in closer to open the door behind you, “too late for that isn’t it, princess?” 

he bloops you on the nose end the conversation and guides you to your seat, “milady?”

“thank you~”

how could this boy fill you up with heart-shaped bubbles inside?

you didn’t know the festival was going to be this crowded; finals were a couple weeks away so you figured everyone wanted to relax before the storm of stress hits 

Wooyoung was already holding your hand as he held out his other one

“what?” you questioned

“your bag,” Wooyoung always held you bag, he didn’t care about what people would think if they saw him alone with your bag 

you tried to hide your smile when he said, “can’t have my princess lifting even a finger now”

“okay. chill, prince charming~”

Wooyoung was listing the things he wanted to do but made sure that the ferris wheel was the last thing you guys would do before leaving 

you were listening attentively to what he was saying until your stomach growled quite loudly despite of the loud festivities 

he chuckles as he pulls you closer to him, “did I just hear your stomach growl?”

“maybe..” your face was growing a light flush of pink

Wooyoung shrugs his shoulders as he nods, “well since you’re not that hungry, we’re just gonna past the frozen custard and churros stand-”

“WAIT I’M ACTUALLY HUNGRY!” you pouted as you swung his arm back and forth 

without another word, Wooyoung makes his way to the stand and has you wait for him by the table area near the water front

right around that time you saw Yeosang

although you haven’t talked to Seonghwa after you two broke up, you frequently talked to Yeosang whenever you saw him when you went to the campus bookstore that he worked in 

but you knew that, where ever Yeosang was, Seonghwa was closeby

those two were inseparable

Yeosang saw how awkward it still was between you and Seonghwa, “I’m gonna go get churros!”

“wait Yeo..sang..” Seonghwa tried to call out to his friend but he already left

Yeosang ran to wait in line with Wooyoung; points back at you and Seonghwa and Wooyoung gives a nod of confirmation

you wondered how Wooyoung knew everyone; trying to ignore the fact that you were standing there with your ex you haven’t spoken to since freshman year 

...

there was a moment of awkward silence; you were fiddling with the frayed strings of your skirt and Seonghwa was scuffing the ground with the bottom of his shoes

“you.. you look nice today...” Seonghwa tries to break the ice

you nodded without looking at him, “thanks...”

“um.. so I know it’s been a while.. but I want to apologize..” 

that got your attention; so you looked up to hear him out 

he missed those eyes, that face.. you

“I was a stupid, selfish freshman.. I know that I shouldn’t have done the things that I did and I know you deserve the world.. and I can see that you’re so much more happier now and it makes me happy to see you being with someone who can treat you better than I ever could and I want to say sorry for all the pain I caused and-”

you started to chuckle, “do you even breath? that’s a lot of “and’s” in one sentence”

he gives you a small smile, “will I ever be forgiven?”

“I never loathed you, Seonghwa. I just wanted to hear your side after all these years. honestly, if you apologized to me our freshman year, probably wouldn’t hear anything you had to say.. but I had a lot of time to think and reflect on what happened. I want to believe that everything happens for a reason.. the reason might not be the one we want it to be. but here we are..”

Seonghwa started to get nervous, for what reason, even he didn’t know what he was feeling inside, “so.. we’re good? we can move on from this, as friends?”

you stuck out your hand for him to take, “as friends”

he’ll take that offer over the selfish ex-boyfriend as he takes your hand

you both stood there for a moment until you felt a heavy arm on your shoulders; the familiar scent of Versace Dylan Blue cologne

Wooyoung gently pulled you hand back from Seonghwa’s, “holding on a little too long there, buddy..”

Yeosang comes back and nudges the cup of frozen custard topped with bite-sized churros to him, “everything good?”

Seonghwa nods as he takes a bite, “got everything off of my chest.. well, we’ll see you two around!”

Seonghwa pushes Yeosang in a different direction; the boys wave goodbye to you and you wave back, happy knowing that you got some closure from that old relationship

“did you get everything off of your chest too?” Wooyoung knew all about your previous boy problems; he was a good listener and a better advice giver

you nodded; re-latching yourself onto his arm

Wooyoung heard the sound of some guitar tuning and tugged you along, “I think there’s a performance going on!”

you quickly saw who was on stage, it was Jongho

“this is my first public performance and I’m really nervous. so before I start, I just want to give a special thanks..” it was like Jongho sensed that you were there when he made eye contact with you 

“a special thanks to my role model and my senior, you all probably know her, Miss. Y/N,” he formally gestures his hands over to you and everyone just looks at you 

although you were slightly shy, you didn’t look at anyone else but Jongho as you gave him a thumbs up

“Y/N, really helped me write my first song and it is my first time performing it, she also taught me a lot about singing techniques and music producing.. so I want to dedicate this song to her..”

to make his statement less of a confession, he adds in, “her and her boyfriend because they are such a power couple and I aspire to have a relationship like them one day..”

people started giggling at his statement; saying stuff like how cute he was and how thoughtful he was 

Wooyoung chimes in with the crowd, “he’s a good kid”

Jongho sings his song as he thinks about how lucky he was to be signed into the same label as you, without any prior knowledge of you signing with any company

he wanted to be a singer as you wanted to be a producer; so he didn’t see you as often as he saw the other trainees

but every time that he did see you, he took every chance he got to talk to you about composing and lyric writing and just everything about producing makeup 

his love for you is a love of respect; not in anyway romantic 

you could feel his love through his song and you nearly cried

“he’s gotten so good at singing...” you mumbled as you were about to have tears fall from your eyes 

Wooyoung holds onto your hands a little tighter, “thanks to the best teacher anyone could ask for~” 

you smiled even after he finished the performance and disappeared backstage 

Wooyoung saw a Shoot-The-Duck booth as you were gushing about Jongho’s performance 

before he could say anything about going over to the booth, you saw a HUGE Gudetama plushie that had a crown on it’s head that you REALLY wanted and pointed to it

“BABE-” 

“I gotchu..” you both walk over to it when you notice that person in charge of the booth was Hongjoong

he was flirting with a girl that was trying to get a plushy without playing the game; but he was being stern at the same time 

“sorry, sweetheart.. I wouldn’t get paid if I did that..”

Hongjoong was still as beautiful as ever; even though he was probably just eye candy from the start 

when the girl walks away, Hongjoong’s fell onto you 

“trying to win the lady over here some plushies?” he hugs a Sanrio plushy, “I got some pretty good ones but because it’s sucha high quality set on display.. it’s gonna be pretty hard to score even the little one”

Wooyoung just nods as he hands a ticket over to Hongjoong, “I’ll try anyways..”

Hongjoong loads the toy rifle with 10 tiny rubber bullets, “shoot away~”

you stand back with Hongjoong to let Wooyoung do this thing

“how are things going lately?” you asked him; you both were classmates in a lot of classes through the four years of college, so small talk was normal

“I got a girl now. she’s not as amazing as you, but you could say I’m pretty lucky to have her,” he showcases that oh-so-lovely smile at you,“she’s got flaws but it’s only been a month now.. I can say she’s a pretty hairy gal..”

you gave him a jokingly-extra surprised face, “way to call out a flaw on a girl, what’s her name?”

“her name is Luna~” he shows you the lockscreen on his phone

it was a picture of him and his husky/corgi puppy 

you couldn’t help but laugh, “she’s a keeper”

“excuse me, sir. could I get my lady her gift now?” Wooyoung shoves himself in between you and Hongjoong 

you both looked over at the shelf with the fallen king Gudetama on the ground

Hongjoong smiles as he collects the gift and gives it to you, “Wooyoung’s a lucky guy~”

you answered back when Wooyoung took the plushy from you, “I’m actually the lucky one here~”

“see you later, man” Wooyoung says to Hongjoong 

you finally got to experience the rest of the festival with a lighter heart 

at the corner of your eye, you swore you saw Mingi and Yunho but you didn’t get a chance to confirm when Wooyoung interrupted you

“babe, lets go to the ferris wheel~”

you smiled back at him to let him lead the way 

you tried to look back to where you thought you saw them, but they weren’t there 

you were waiting in line with Wooyoung when he told you he had to go to the bathroom

Mingi shakes Yunho from behind the pole; he whispers loudly, “HE’S LEAVING TO GO TO THE BATHROOM. GO! I’LL DISTRACT HIM IF HE FINISHES QUICKLY!”

Mingi shoves Yunho towards your direction and awkwardly walks quickly into Wooyoung’s direction

“Yunho?” you called out to him

he looks back at you and then Mingi, “y-yeah..”

“are you here with Mingi? I thought I saw him earlier..” you mumbled as you looked around Yunho; ignoring the fact that this was the first time you were talking to Yunho since the party 

“Mingi had to go to the bathroom,” Yunho mumbled as he shoved his hands into his pockets; slightly upset that you were more interested in seeing Mingi than him

but then again, he wasn’t surprised by your reaction to him

“you two ready to go on?” the ferris wheel operator asked

you looked for Wooyoung but he couldn’t get back into line; Mingi was with him

Mingi yelled, “just go on with Y/N, I’ll go on with my buddy, Wooyoung here!”

Wooyoung really did make friends everywhere he went

you looked at Wooyoung for some indication that he might say no, but just shooed you to go on without him 

you awkwardly went into the carriage with king Gudetama and Yunho 

“I hope this was a good idea,” Wooyoung murmurs to Mingi

Mingi slings his arm around Wooyoung, “Yunho’s got 30 minute to make it up to her.. have a little faith”

the first 5 minutes were just you two breathing the awkward air as the carriage slowly raised up into the air

the whole time Yunho just thought about how he wanted to be the one you went home with every night, the only laying next to you with his arms around you..the one to love you through and through 

you took the time to look around the campus; spotting all the places you’ve been to and all the streets you walked on 

you saw San’s cafe; all the lights were off

you hoped to see him after this awkward carriage ride to tell him all about your day and to see his date 

“Y/N..” Yunho broke the silence 

“hmm..” you didn’t look at him; you couldn’t 

“I..”

“I don’t want to hear an apology.. I just want to know the truth..” you mumbled 

it was different getting an apology from Seonghwa versus getting one with Yunho

Yunho was a part of your past, a ghost of your present, and a thought of your future 

he told you about how he confronted Aurora and how she was filled with hatred towards you; how she controlled him, how she was going to hurt herself if Yunho ever left her, and how she forbade him to tell you about the situation and to never ever talk to you

you must admit that would’ve been a sticky situation to deal with

but it wasn’t enough to mend the relationship you two used to have

you couldn’t say anything when he finished telling you EVERYTHING about how you two fell apart before the party

all of this took an additional 10 minutes of him rambling trying to get you to understand why he did the things he did 

taking your silence as a sign that wasn’t enough, he continued 

“I miss you..” you could hear his voice breaking apart

you couldn’t help but feel choked up by his voice; you clenched your plushy tighter 

“you don’t get to do that to me..” your voice was breaking even though you forced yourself not to 

but when you looked up at him, tears fell from your face, “you can’t expect me to wait for you throughout my childhood, basically thinking that you were dead.. then coming back into my life only to have it break apart because you thought I deserved better?”

Yunho didn’t know what to say but he wanted to respond to you

you cut him off as you shook your shake 

“I loved you... I didn’t care if it made me happy or anything.. I just wanted to be with you.. that made me happy. didn’t I show you that? was it real or was it all in my head?” 

the awkward air in the carriage became humid with tears and sniffling gasps for air to push away the lumps in your throats 

“you never said-”

“actions speak louder than words, Yunho!”

“but actions without words are confusing! I don’t know everything! I can’t read minds, Y/N!”

he exhaled sharply to calm himself down and you did the same

you were selfish, but you thought that you had the right to be after all that Yunho has done

“nothing I say now can take away what I did to you four years ago, Y/N.. but I really do love you and care for you still to this day.. you’ll always be apart of me even if I’m not in yours..” 

you agreed, nothing he said could take away the pain you felt but hopefully, one day, you both can move on from this 

“I do appreciate Wooyoung being the one caring for you though.. you two look so great together..” you could feel the sincerity in his voice

you wished he could’ve said the same about you two four years ago; that it should’ve been you two instead

and like that the 30 minute ferris wheel ride was over

Wooyoung and Mingi decided not to go on the ferris wheel and waited for you and Yunho instead

Wooyoung came up to you as the operator opened to door for you and Yunho

“you okay, princess?” he notices your slightly puffy eyes

“yeah we had a deep conversation but I think all is well now..” you manage to say

Yunho was so relieved to hear that, he didn’t notice Wooyoung getting on one knee in front of you

“Y/N...”

your eyes widened as you started to shake in pure astonishment 

“Woo- baby.. you..wha-what are you...” you couldn’t even form a sentence properly

“I was going to do this in the carriage of the ferris wheel so this will have to do,” Wooyoung pulls out a sapphire velvet ringbox and lifts it open

everyone around you could see the most beautiful ring you’ve ever seen

it looked like something the Great Gatsby would’ve proposed to Daisy with 

“you mean the world to me.. and I would do anything in the world to have you by my side.. so would you take the chance to rule the world with me as my queen?” Wooyoung looks at you through his slightly long bangs;  you could tell there was none of his usually teasing demeanor in sight

“Y/N.. will you marry me?”

San dropped the bouquet of baby’s breath he got for you; the first bouquet he’s ever bought for a girl, his first love

the girl who made him feel what love was for the first time

San was going to confess to you; more so just tell you how much you meant to him, how you were the most important person in the world to him, how you were the one his wishing star told him to meet 

but he was too late.. one year? two years? three years? four? 

he should’ve told you about his feelings for you when he walked you to the train tracks that one sunset four years ago 

he never used those chances that he could’ve had with you; all for the reason that things between you two could never be the same

and now, fate was sealed, you two would never be the same 

San runs past you as you were congratulated by everyone around you

Yunho clenches his jaw as he smiles for you; he saw this coming but not this soon

Mingi swallows the lump in his throat as he ruffles your hair, “she’s all grown up now.. the band would be so happy to see their baby sister in one of her happiest moments of life”

everything was happening so fast; you could feel the world spinning around you

but when San briskly walks past you, the spinning came to a stop

you kisses Wooyoung as you told him you’d be right back

you ran after him as you called out to him

he couldn’t hear you; you tried your best to get as close to him as possible 

San thought he was hearing things when he could hear you call his name louder and louder

he turns and sees you chasing after him

he immediately stops and lets you catch your breath  

“why didn’t you say hi or anything?” you huffed and puffed

San grabbed your hand and placed it on his heart

he was falling out of his usually calm state and started to show more of his real self; he wasn’t okay, he was heartbroken, he’s been heartbroken

“even though you just ran, why does my heart feel like it’s my heart is beating faster than yours?” you were confused at what he was trying to say

“San.. are you oka-”

“NO! I’M NOT!”

you’ve never heard him yell or raise his voice

“I’ve been by your side for so long.. I knew you never saw me the way I saw you. I ignored it. I tried to move on. I thought my actions would be loud enough for you to hear.. but why do you keep on making my heart beat so fast for? why do..”

San looks up at you with his glossy-coated eyes, “why do I love you?”

your mouth opened in shocked; San? you?

you could recall having deja vu when you said the same thing to Yunho

San felt his hand placed around the ring that Wooyoung proposed to you with and let go of it

“I tried to be “just friends,” but you know what? everything happens for a reason right? I’m sorry, pretend this never happened..” San smiles through his visible tears

“San..” you reached for him but he stepped back 

“congratulations Y/N... Wooyoung is one lucky guy...”

San runs as soon as he saw Wooyoung run up behind you, “babe, is everything okay?”

all you wanted to do was cry into his chest

Wooyoung didn’t question anything after he saw you breakdown

Yunho happens to find a bouquet of baby’s breath on the ground near the ferris wheel waiting area, “what’s a perfectly good bouquet doing on the ground?” 

he finds a card written inside

he recognized the handwriting and signature, it was his current roommate’s, San’s

it said everything that San had just told you

he chuckles as he stares up into the setting sun-colored clouds, “there’s really no one in this world like Y/N...” 

[FAST-FORWARD TO ONE YEAR AFTER YOU ALL GRADUATE]

it was your wedding day

you never thought that your scrapbook of your ideal wedding from high school would in handy

everything was perfectly the way you would’ve thought royalties would have their weddings 

and your dress?

it was specifically designed for you by Hongjoong who graduated as a fashion designer 

“are you sure you don’t wanna ditch this wedding and runaway with me?” Hongjoong joked as he made the final touches to your dress 

“I think I love my soon-to-be husband too much for that. sorry Hongjoong~” you have him a just-as-joking face of condolence

the hair and makeup crew came in for their final touches as well

Hongjoong dramatically bows, “I’ll see you at the alter, my sweets”

“yeah in your dreams~” you smiled at him 

you chatted with the crew when you saw Yunho walk in baring a little bag

“Yunho!” you slapped him on the arm, “what are you doing in here!?”

everything was how it used to be with Yunho; minus the romantic aspect 

he gave you a sincere smile as he hands you the bag, “thought you’d look better than you already do with these”

you rolled your eyes as you opened them; it was a pair of stunning earrings

“you shouldn’t have..” you pouted at him

he shrugs with his lips curved to the skies, “just putting the cherry on top for your special day~”

you thanked Yunho with a hug; he envelopes you like a teddy bear and kisses your head

he wishes that time would stop right there; hoping that it would be like how it used to be

but time stops for no one and he walks out the door just like that

“SURPRISE!”

Mingi comes in shortly after with the band, recording your reaction, “I THOUGHT YOU GUYS COULDN’T MAKE IT!!”

they all came in to give you a group hug; Mingi didn’t even join because 1) he was behind the camera and 2) he was just in awe to see how beautiful you were clad in white 

“thanks for coming.. it means so so much to me..”

“and you mean so so much to us. of course we would come, silly goose..” the bassist of the band pinches your cheeks and the others laugh

Mingi could’ve had a chance with you if he wasn’t so insecure in himself; he was so love in with you it scared to and made him back away 

but this was fine

because he convinced himself that you wouldn’t be this happy if you were with him a long time ago 

Jongho came in with a big flower sign from the company and gifted you and Wooyoung with a song he wrote; you had invited him as the spotlight singer for your wedding and Jongho couldn’t say no to that

Yeosang and Seonghwa came in to greet you as well, they were your flower boys because honestly you and Wooyoung didn’t think of that until last minute; frankly speaking all the other ladies who attended the wedding probably wouldn’t mind seeing some flower-looking flower boys

everyone had left the room when San was leaning by the door 

he saw you in your element; fiddling with the earrings that got caught in your veil

he doesn’t say anything when he walks over to help you

“San?” you were surprise to even see him

he’s turned into an acquaintance the after day he confessed to you

even when you tried to make conversations with him, he’d answer them bluntly and go back to whatever he was doing

you thought lost your best friend; he never made time for you anymore after that incident 

but something in your heart told you that it was more than just that

you haven’t seen him since you graduated

you sent him an invite but even you were skeptical that he wouldn’t come

he looks different now

he dyed his hair blonde and it was pushed back 

he wore a simple light grey suit; formal enough to be worn at a wedding but it was a pretty casual look compared to everyone else

“I didn’t think you were going to come..”

“why wouldn’t I?” his voice was softer and deeper than you remembered, “my best friend is getting married.. I wouldn’t miss it for the world..”

you knew how hard it must’ve been for him

but since he slowly detached himself from your life, it’s been hard on you too

you truly missed him

you didn’t know what to say; there were so many emotions running through your head and heart 

“I got you something. could you lift up your veil?”

you did as he asked and you could see his face ever so clearly

was he always this handsome?

when San made eye contact with you, he remembers all the feelings he tried to push away since he confessed to you

he places a necklace around your neck; it was dainty and it had yours and Wooyoung’s initials on strung onto the chain with diamonds in between each letter

“think of it as your final paycheck..” 

there it was

his signature smile 

his hands left the clasp of the necklace and you wanted to grab his hands

but you didn’t

“you look beautiful, Y/N.. you truly are one of a kind...” San shoves his hands in his pockets and left the room 

what moments lead up to this?

what feelings did you have bottled up inside?

what lies were you feeding yourself?

what lies were you feeding to others?

you couldn’t help but cry as you frantically get up to run

Wooyoung turned his head as he saw the beautiful sight of you

“Y/N, you know it’s bad luck to see each other before the wed- are you crying? babe what’s wrong?”

how could you tell Wooyoung you loved him when you loved someone else?

you wanted to tell yourself that that person that made you second guess yourself on your wedding day was the same person you thought you told yourself that you could never be interested in them

but Wooyoung saw through you

he knew everything

he knew the moment he met you for the first time; accompanied by San

he knew the moment he saw how you interacted with San

if anything, he was also convincing himself that there wasn’t anything there 

Yunho gave Wooyoung the bouquet of baby’s breath right after your encounter with San; he read the card 

Wooyoung always lived his life honestly but wanted to be selfish for once in his life

Wooyoung reached for your left ring finger and gently took off the ring, “everything happens for a reason, right?”

you felt so sorry towards Wooyoung; he didn’t deserve this

but he wiped your tears as if he could read your mind and kissed your forehead, “I’ll give up the world for you. even if I’m not going to be apart of your world, you’ll always be in mine.. I don’t think I’ll love anyone as much as I love you... but!”

he flips your veil, “you need to be with the one you truly love.. that would make me the happiest man in the world..”

“Wooyoung...” you gave him one last bittersweet kiss

he reaches into his pocket and hands you his card

“people are going to ask a lot of questions about this.. I think you should hide for a while.. I got this..”

he gently pushes you to the door; not giving you time to protest

“go to him... go to San..”

you cried as you looked at Wooyoung who was standing there by him lonesomeness 

you turned and ran; because if you stayed for a second longer, you wouldn’t have the heart to leave him the way you just did

Wooyoung cried for the first time in his life as he clenched the ring he thought would promise you happiness 

you ran

heels tacking against the marbled floor

you didn’t care that guests were coming into the venue; you had to find San

you saw his figure getting into his car

you knew you had no chance to catch up to him in your heels

so you through them away and ran to him 

but you stopped when you saw a silhouette of another woman wiping his tears

he grabs her hands and kisses her forehead

then he kisses her lips

you were seeing things?

the car backed up to exit the venue

that was when everything was as clear as it could’ve got

San was with someone else; he was crying in someone else’s arms 

she was someone that was going to mend his broken heart from you 

he looks out the window one last time; praying that you’ll have a happily ever after

that was when he saw you; face covered in tears dress slightly tattered from the gravel on the ground 

that sight of you like that would be ingrained in his head forever

he wanted to stop the car

he wanted to run to you

but he had no courage to

because if he did, he would never let you go 

so he let the car sped away from the venue, from you

Wooyoung saw all of this happen from the window of his room and ran to where you were

guilt washed over you

how could you ever love someone without feeling like you were the caused of all the misfortune of love around you ever again?

you weren’t mad at anyone but yourself

you felt a warm embrace; the scent of a familiar Versace Dylan Blue cologne

you never thought you smelled this scent ever again

you thought this scent would leave you forever

“I’m sorry.. Wooyoung, I’m so sorry..” you chanted 

you knew he was crying before you felt pellets of tears fall onto your veil

he carried you back into the venue

“we don’t have to do the wedding if you don’t want to... you don’t have to be with me-”

you shook your head to shake out the tears and any other second doubts you had in your mind, “please don’t let me go.. ever again...” 

at this point, neither one of you knew who was the selfish one in this moment

Hongjoong shooed Wooyoung away to fix your dress while the hair and makeup crew dragged him out 

the wedding went on like how it was planned

you and Wooyoung were the only one who knew of what happened and it was slowly pushed to the farther-most corner of your minds

time is foe enemy but time is also a foe

what did you regret?

what would you give to turn the clock back in time?

would you have said those unspoken words?

Hongjoong would’ve

Yunho would’ve

Mingi would’ve

Jongho?

Yeosang?

Seonghwa?

San?

even Wooyoung? 

everything happens for a reason; you knew that

but not everyone knows what the reason is

the reason could be happiness

the reason could be anger 

the reason could be guilt

the reason could be an answer

but the reason could be a question

END

I FINISHED THIS AT 7AM PST LOL. THANK YOU FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT! I WILL BE CONTINUING WRITING REQUESTS. THIS SERIES WAS A JOURNEY AND NOW IT’S OVER. 

[ masterlist + guidelines ]

[skamfrance]

Maxence Danet Fauvel, interview for Actors’ Factory - March 22

Translation under the cut

Hello Maxence

M : Hello !

What was it that appealed to you in the “Facto”?

M: First of all, the person that is Tiffany Stern. I had come to help my roommate paint the fence of the Facto, because we’d just moved here, and so I could see Tiff…be, amongst the people who were there, and there was this really cool atmosphere in that house, in this future artist house, back then.

And afterwards, as I was saying earlier, it really happened on a whim, one morning I woke up and though “fuck, I have to go there”, as if there had been a force telling me “dude, do it”.

How did you live your formation at the Facto?

M: So for me it’s a little special, because it really changed my life completely. I found the first year really interesting, because it teaches you a lot of stuff about yourself, it allows you to develop. Beyond the “actor”, it allows you to develop your inner artist, all its facets, and you as a human being too. And that is awesome. Because it shows you your weaknesses, the masks you wear, your bad sides, it shoves them in your face and so it allows you to work on them. And it also shows your good sides, and even those you’re not necessarily aware of.

And the adventure continues in second year where I start working on scenes and stuff, where I fail completely, I am bad and I’m aware of it. And that’s when I start feeling the pressure, because I tell myself “fuck, I’ve been here for a year, I feel good, it’s a career I’m interested in, but I don’t feel like I have the abilities”. And that’s hard to go through. It’s really hard because you think…actually, it only depends on you, in the end. It only depends on you and the intensity with which you’re going to work. And then we started the spoon rivers (?) exercise, so the monologue exercise that happens in January of the second year. The spoons exercise is really what gave me all the tools to succeed during filming…and even when auditioning. It’s really what taught me to work, and now I work on every scene I have like I did on a spoon river.

What does the Facto bring you as an actor?

M: No but it can bring you a lot because it’s really professionalizing. You’ll always be disappointed to fail an audition, but they teach you to relax and have fun when you do audition, because we’re incredibly lucky to do a job in which we have so much fun. And you really have to keep that with you, because if you don’t, and you focus on “success” or things like that, it won’t work.

It gives you support, permanent support. When I’m shooting, I talk to my colleagues, we have group conversations where I say “guys, I’m panicking, I have a scene to film and I can’t remember how to do this or that, do you remember that class, do you have advice for me? How do you work on that?” and…together. And it’s a crazy amount of support.

Whenever I get good news, I go to this house of artists to share it, because…well because people want you to succeed, there’s no competition. Because we feel great here, it’s an artists’ house, it’s a place where everyone is tight-knit, it’s a place where you want to come to work, to relax. I don’t know, it’s a second home.

Why are you getting coached by Tiff?

M: There are always…2 or 3 things about my character that I struggle with, because I’m young, because I lack experience, because I’m new to this profession, etc. And in fact, Tiff’s coaching helps me unlock things that aren’t exactly necessary, that probably won’t be seen on screen,  but that are going to help you build a character that is more nuanced, more colorful…more real, actually. It’s really about putting your finger on small things that you’re wrong about. You’re wrong, but it’s not serious, it’s just that you misunderstand certain aspects of your character. I really took Tiffany Stern’s coaching to create my character, I’ve never been coached to work on scenes, I’ve never been coached for auditioning, I really did it for the construction of a complex character, and for that, it helps…every time. I do it every time I have a part to work on, because…First I work on it alone, because otherwise it’s useless, she’s not going to do your job for you, but once you’ve really worked on your character, and that…and sometimes you can blind yourself, you can be set on an idea, tell yourself “fuck, it’s that, the solution is here, I know it!”, and you can just be told “no, look: you have that too” and she does it so well, that in one hour you get about one week of work done.

Can you tell us about Eliott, your character in Skam?

M: Yeah. I mean he has so many facets that he’s super hard to describe. But when I started preparing for him, I wrote him a letter. A letter in which I promise to respect a certain number of values, principles, beliefs, everything that the character wants to represent, because that character exists somewhere. And when I started working on him, I drew him from the back, and I wrote all the words that came to mind. He’s a lover, first. He’s a lover of everything, and that’s the first thing I was told when I got the statement of intent for this character…He’s a guy who can fall in love with a door handle, as he can fall in love with a man, with a woman, a plant, anything. He’s a boy who suffers a lot, who doesn’t show it. He struggles with handling his relationships because he feels so…Actually he feels whatever you and I could feel, but to the thousandth power. It makes him really moving, and as a parallel, negative things affect him intensely too. And that’s the kind of seesaw thing that he’s always on that makes him so fragile, even if he sometimes looks really confident.

Why was it so nice to film with David Hourrègue?

M: OK, so…because he’s an awesome human being. He’s…Axel and I called him “dad”. It was really that, he was a guy that…Even for me, from the first day I learned I was cast on this show, this guy called me almost everyday to know how I was, to know how I was dealing with the project. And after, during rehearsals, every night after rehearsals, he would call us to say “are you OK? You’re not too stressed? How are you feeling? Are you sleeping well?”. Super caring, always listening to our fears, our anxieties, our expectations, everything. We were so connected, at all times, during shooting that with one word…at the end he could direct us with one word, with one gesture, with one look.

How did you work on your character’s love story?

M: I was simply told : you have to act out a love story and never ever ever talk about sexuality. While working on this story... and even me while working on this character, I never talked about sexuality. Because he’s in love with everything. He’s in love with everything, so it makes no difference. He can be in love with a song, he can be in love with a man, with a woman, and it didn’t make a difference.

How did you create this chemistry with Axel Auriant?

M: First of all, we worked a lot in order to just live it. And that’s... I’m clearly using David Hourrègue’s words there, because that’s what he told us. He said ‘Guys, we’re gonna work our asses off for two months so that when you get on set, you just have to live your story.’ That’s the first thing. And then the second very important thing is that Axel and I saw each other every single day before shooting. We got to know each other in real life so that we could trust each other as actors. There was no awkwardness, we trusted each other 3000%, we supported each other completely, we were totally connected.

What message do you want to send out with this season of Skam?

M: The first message, the general message, is really about open mindedness on love stories between men. The thing is, for me there was another one, because there was also one on Eliott’s bipolar side. I wanted to make it... Fuck, here it comes. This is gonna be hard. I also have a side like that. I often get depressions and sometimes i feel like I have another me that’s hurting me. And it’s very difficult, because even if you talk about it to people, you don’t get any real support. Because it’s really an internal thing. If some people can see themselves in it... If you go through something this hard, well... thanks to love, actually... I’m not saying you can get yourself out of it alone, because it’s extremely difficult. But someone can. It’s not soft, it’s violent. But I’m sure every human being on Earth has someone who can help with their personal problems. And for me, it was Lucas. I mean, me... Eliott. For Eliott, it was Lucas.

[definegirlfriends]

favorite fics where one of the boys comes to the realization that they’re not straight?

All of these fics are about them realizing they aren’t straight, or similar enough that I thought they could be included! I put a little ✨ by my favorites! Enjoy x 

Allies in Heaven, Comrades in Hell: (265k) A Catholic school!AU where Louis is finishing sixth form and will definitely be famous someday if Harry has something to say about it, Liam is the racist homophobe that Zayn is dreadfully in love with, and Niall teaches guitar.  ✨

Baby Heaven’s In Your Eyes: (120k) A sixth form!AU where Harry is the fucked up bad boy with too many problems, Louis is the perfect rich boy with too much money and their schools are right across from each other. They meet at a party and that’s the last (and maybe the only) thing they need. ✨

Both Showing Hearts: (113k) Louis Tomlinson is, in fact, not straight. Harry Styles isn’t sure what he is. Together, they figure it out, and maybe fall in love along the way. Or, the Uni AU where Louis helps Harry figure out his sexuality, Niall crashes a bachelorette party, Liam works in a printing centre, and Zayn happens to need lots of printing done.

Completely, and Absolutely: (2.5k) Louis is so completely and absolutely NOT gay that the fact that anyone thinks Harry is his soulmate is just being ridiculous. Including himself. He just thinks they’re mates that are two parts of the same soul, and that’s not weird at all. Okay?Or, the one in which Louis spends the entirety of X Factor so deep in denial that he doesn’t realize he’s gay until he’s already 3000% gone for the dimpled mess in his arms.

Fumbling In The Dark: (21k) Louis is straight, Harry is not. They still shag a lot.

Hiding Place: (365k) Louis never wanted a soulmate, didn’t really care for the whole Bonding thing at all, really. Enter Harry Styles, who’s wanted to be Bonded for as long as he could remember. With one fateful meeting in an X Factor bathroom, Louis gets a dagger on his arm and the realization that just because Harry is his soulmate doesn’t mean it’s mutual.From the X Factor house to Madison Square Garden, from the Fountain Studios stage to stadiums across the world, Louis has to learn to love without losing himself completely, because someday his best friend will Bond to someone and replace Louis as the center of his universe. ✨

How Many Secrets Can You Keep?: (11k) Harry, a homophobic Christian, joins Louis’ gay-straight alliance club at school, hoping to somehow attract lesbians (he’ll work out the logistics later). Louis shows him what he didn’t know he was actually there for. 

I’m a Beggar In The Morning (I’m a King At Night): (7k) ever since harry whispered things about louis at the grocery store they’ve been best friends and harry’s straight and louis’ not and that’s just how it is. “Sweet dreams, love,” Louis murmurs, and even though he feels creepy, he slips his hand in between Harry’s thighs and it’s warm and he kisses his cheek. He turns and leaves and doesn’t see that Harry’s eyes snap open or hear that a whine comes from his mouth.

I’m Trying Not To Make A Sound: (10k) Louis thinks he could die right there. He can’t feel anything but the tingling sensation all over his skin. He’s throwing away all his past thoughts on trying to be straight and denying his reactions towards other men, he just wants more of this numbing feeling. Everything else is a long lost memory, can’t think of anything else besides, wow, this feels incredible. or basically, “I am in fact straight.” / “Don’t knock it till you try it.”

Learning to Breathe: (110k) He’s playing football at one of the top universities in England and he should love everything about his life right now, but instead he’s moving backwards. How does your past fit into your present? Louis is still figuring it out. ✨

Let Me Teach You Something: (72k) In the last year of their degree program, the five boys are put in a group for the duration of a year long Capstone class. They will spend days and nights together working tirelessly to finish school. Louis has no problem with his sexuality and has the notches on his bed post to prove it, but will straight-laced, straight-boy Harry change all that? 

My Heart Is Beating For This Moment In Time: (160k) When Louis first saw Harry at the 2010 X Factor Auditions, he thought he was watching a peculiarly special stranger. But Harry has known Louis ever since he was five years old.Because Louis has a rare genetic disorder that causes him to Time Travel to important moments in his past and in his future - and to Harry, always to Harry. When they’re put into a band together, it seems like everything Harry has been waiting and wishing for has finally come true. Except for the small fact that Louis doesn’t know that Harry is in love with him- that Harry’s always been in love with him. Fate, it would seem, is just getting started.A story about growing up and growing together, and the impossible love that makes it all worthwhile. ✨

Nobody Compares To You: (10k) Harry has a long-term crush on his bandmate and best friend Louis, who is straight, at least as far as he knows. He also starts falling in love with this guy he met on tumblr. Who also has a crush on his own best mate. Things are about to get complicated.Or, the one where Harry falls in love twice, Louis is just incredibly sweet and supportive, and Al from tumblr is super nice but also really secretive about his identity - not that Harry can blame him, considering his own blog is run under false pretenses, too.

Not So Typical: (90k) Harry Styles; football phenomenon, academic prodigy and the most liked guy at Washington State.  Harry has it all; the looks, the popularity, the best friends and it doesn’t hurt that there is a line of girls ready to jump his bones at any second.  It all was perfect…almost perfect that is.  Until that one night, with that one too many drink still burning in his throat and those piercing blue eyes infusing themselves into his every thought.

Photograph: (207k) Harry steadies his jaw. “What do you want from me?”Louis’ bottom lip wobbles. “I’m not gay.”“Are you trying to convince me, or yourself?” And at that, Louis seems to completely lose his shit. He rushes towards Harry, banging his fists on Harry’s collarbones in a frenzy, and begins yelling– “I hate you! I hate you! I fucking hate you so much!”Tears are rushing down his cheeks, and then he’s shoving Harry away, drunk out of his ass, causing Harry to stumble back a bit. Louis then begins to clutch at himself, fisting his own clothes to his chest, dribble falling from his mouth, his arms shaky and his back hunched.“Fuckfuckfuckufkcufkc!” He spits, face contorted, hands trembling. “I hate you!”“No, you don’t.” Harry steps forward, face concerned. “You don’t hate me.”- An epic love story in which Harry is too in love for his own good, Louis is in denial of his sexuality, and they write songs instead of actually talking to each other.

Pillow Talk: (25k) “So, do you think I should… find someone to fool around with?” Harry asks, nervous again. “To see if I like it?”  Louis swallows hard but hopes he covers it pretty well with a casual shrug. “I mean, it would probably help to know that you actually want everything that goes along with being with a guy. If you can’t handle the machinery, it’s probably not for you, you know?”  Harry nods and appears to be steeling himself. Louis tenses, afraid that he knows what’s coming.  “Would you do it?”  “Do what?” Louis plays dumb.  Harry has to take another deep breath before he can say it.  “Will you help me figure out if I like it? Being with a boy?” Or When Harry starts having confusing feelings for a male classmate, his sister’s best friend, Louis, helps him figure himself out. Cue lots of kissing, sex, and falling in love.

Red Brick Heart: (98k) Uni AU. Harry had turned up at the halls of residence expecting fun, new friends, and maybe a life experience or two. What he doesn’t expect is a surprise roommate who’s loud and dramatic and obsessed with tea and is maybe, actually, all he’s ever wanted. ✨

Resist Everything Except Temptation: (100k) The one where Louis is the commodore’s son who is forced to become a part of Harry’s crew when he is captured. ✨

Shake Me Down: (208k) Harry’s new to college, fresh out of Catholic school and conversion therapy camp, and Louis runs the campus LGBTQIA organization. ✨

Standing Here But You Don’t See Me: (22k) “Louis being with a guy is something Harry has always known was a possibility. Ever since Louis told them he was gay, he knew that this would come up at some point. But it was just that. At some point. It’s always been a hypothetical. Harry never thought it would bother him. But now, watching Louis squirm as he watches that other guy, it’s just not a hypothetical anymore. And Harry is very bothered by it.“or: Harry’s discovery that he like boys as well as girls. One boy in particular catches his eye and he’s determined to get him.

Supposed to Be: (20k) “I’m making a movie for a film competition, and I want you to be in it,” Harry told Louis. “I think you would be a great leading actor in it.” “Why?” “Because it’s you. I mean, who wouldn’t want to know all about the amazing Louis Tomlinson? It would be a great movie.” “You don’t have some weird crush or, like, secret obsession with me, do you?” Louis asked. Harry bit his tongue so he didn’t say “Ew, I have standards.” He didn’t think that would go over well. Of course, that was assuming Louis understood what that meant. — Or, the Geek Charming AU where Harry’s a film geek, Louis’ a popular jock, and they both need each other to get what they want.

The Impossible Now: (49k) A wish on Christmas Eve sends Louis to an alternate dimension where Harry is a member of One Direction. 

Unbelievers: (136k) It’s Louis’ senior year, and he’s dead set on doing it right. However, along with his pair of cleats, a healthy dose of sarcasm and his ridiculous best friend, he’s also got a complicated family, a terrifyingly uncertain future, and a mortal enemy making his life just that much worse. Mortal enemies “with benefits” was not exactly the plan. ✨

You and Me: (12k) harry is potentially screwed and louis is definitely hopeless, but its ok because as long as they’re in each other’s lives, everything will somehow probably turn out the way that its supposed to.

[vickisventures]

Proud to be an American!

(The river that runs through the city park/campground in St. Hilaire.)

Happy 4th!  We are sitting at 92 degrees at 12:15 pm and it’s HOT!  I know most of the country is experiencing a heat wave and even if we were still in Colorado, I doubt it’d be much better.  So we sit in the A/C (except for Steve who is out grilling our lunch) and pretend it’s nicer outside. 

We have already finished one week of our Digi-Key training.  It was a tiring week but busy. We have training from 8:30am-5pm every day.  Thankfully, we have not spent all of that time in the classroom.  I have spent a lot of time sitting in training/in-service and it never gets more fun.  There’s always the same personalities that test your patience and there’s always times when you want to beat your head against a wall.   Both Steve and I got stuck in the last 2 rows.  Neither of us prefer that location in a classroom setting.  Our instructor is not the best at teaching a room of 33.  He knows his stuff, without a doubt, but there are times when it feels like he’s only teaching the front row and times when he seems to be having a conversation with himself and we can’t hear what he’s saying. Wednesday they went to no masks IF you’ve been vaccinated and that has helped.  We can understand him better now, but that doesn’t help when he seems to forget he’s teaching to a whole room.  We have 2 other trainers in the room who we can ask questions to and sometimes it seems like there are 3 training sessions going on in 1 room and my head starts to spin.  There is sooo much to learn.  We get most of our training on the floor though.  The last 2 days, we probably only spent 1 hour in the classroom and the rest of the time on the floor.  Lance, our head trainer, keeps saying that 80% of our orders/picks are easy and 20% have some challenge or issue.  After a week, I’m thinking he got the numbers switched.  But they basically gave us some key instructions and and then sent us all to a few bays to “pick.”  We go to a printer, rip off the next order label and set off to fulfill the order.  We each have a hand-held scanner that we scan the order into and use to help us through the picking process.  It tells us what to look for and will either give us a nice tone that tells us we are doing it right, or it gives us an annoying buzz telling us we have an issue.  Sounds easy, right?  Uhh, if it were Amazon, maybe, but this is an electronic parts warehouse and some customers want 3000 tiny parts and others want 1.  Obviously, the 1 is easy to fulfill...most of the time, but the 3000 can be a little trickier.  Some customers require that the manufacturer date be before a certain time.  For example, they may require the part(s) to not be older than 24 months.  So you have to dig through the bin trying to find 3000 that have a date code within 24 months.  You may find 500 but that won’t work so you have to get on the computer and see if there are more somewhere in the system and if so, send out an order for them.  If not, then you have to indicate that the dates weren’t available and someone else will contact the customer to see if they will accept what we have.  Confused yet?  Then there are all sorts of messages you get on your scanner that a newbie has no idea what to do with.  I felt like I was constantly looking for one of our trainers to ask questions and then the other 32 trainees were doing the same thing so you’d just stand and wait your turn.  Once we have the order, we have to pack it so that it will not be damaged as it goes to the packer. There are rules to that also.  It really is a lot more complicated than one would think but I’m hoping that after another month, we’ll know how to handle most issues and things will run smoothly 80% of the time.  The time does go quickly though because there’s always another order coming out of the printer.  Week 2, we are going to be working in some other areas to get a feel for them. Then they’ll put us with mentors a week at at time for 3 weeks to work in different areas. So far we were in the “regular” area and the cut/tape area (this is where the parts are all on a tape like surface on reels).   Neither Steve nor I really liked the cut/tape area.  We’ll see what this week holds.  We are supposed to be in the moisture sensitive area and the electric static discharge area.  We already have to wear something on our shoes to discharge any static you might have on you.  You slip them around the heel of your shoe and then there’s a string that looks like a shoe string that you have to put underneath your foot in the shoe.  I’m going to try to upload a picture of this on my blog but due to serious WiFi challenges, I may not be able to.  We are supposed to check our shoe strips at least 4 times a day (after breaks and such) to make sure they “pass.”  There’s a machine that we step up on that checks to see if we are static free.  If they don’t pass, you have to find the issue before you can go on the floor no matter what area you are working in. A lot of things to remember and learn, but so far, I think we’re going to like working here. 

Our neighbors arrived on the 1st.  So far we are not impressed.  They seem nice, but they have pretty much spread out on our side of the lot where there’s more shade.  For you that aren’t RVers, the perimeters of a site is determined by your hook ups.  That makes it easy to determine what’s yours and what belongs to your neighbors since there’s no literal lines drawn.  Not sure where they missed that but they have been working as gate guards in the oil fields of South Texas and I know you don’t have to share space there.  Also they let their dog run off leash and it wanders into others’ sites.  We may put up with the site encroachment but we won’t put up with that   There are several around that don’t keep their dogs on a tether/leash and we may have to speak to the camp host about it if it becomes a problem.  That’s one of those camping rules that people think only apply to other people.  They don’t need to comply because their sweet “Lassie” is a perfect angel and would never annoy other people or dogs.  Not so!  Otherwise, our site is working out fine.  They are doing some pipeline work down the road so sometimes we get stopped by the work and have to wait before they release us.  Makes it a bit of a challenge to know exactly how long it will take us to get to work but we usually just leave 30 minutes before work and have plenty of time to get logged in and ready for class/work.  

Saturday night we decided to treat ourselves to dinner out.  I knew since it was a holiday weekend, my first choice might be closed but figured we could just go to another restaurant nearby.  Guess I forgot what small towns were like.  After trying 4 different places, all closed, we ended up at Dairy Queen.  Not sure what we’ll do if we want to eat out again tomorrow night!  Guess A&W...(those are the only 2 chains that exist in Thief River Falls that are allowing dine-in!).

We tried out a church in town last Sunday.  It was a non-denominational church since there’s no church of Christ here.  People were somewhat friendly but they only sang 2 songs (led by a music video on a screen).  I can’t do only 2 songs...I don’t think we’ll be back.  I found a church of Christ about 40 minutes from here but when I after seeing their live stream video on Facebook, realized it’s not your typical church of Christ, so that leaves Grand Forks which is 55 minutes away.  I was kind of down about the church situation but Steve and I were able to stream our Amarillo church on my phone this morning so I feel much better.  It did stop and buffer 4 times but we were at least able to catch it all.  I really wasn’t sure we would since we have such trouble with Verizon here. Guess God knew we needed it and gave it a little boost for us!  

[baekzhang]

paperweight | pcy

park chanyeol. reader-insert. 5,2k words. fluff/angst. au

—it couldn’t hold onto those letters forever. Neither could he hold onto her.

this one is for Liv

⚜️

“Dear Chanyeol, 

I’m not quite sure whether to classify you as dumb or cute. Seriously, Park Chanyeol? You sent a ring along with a letter with the words “will you marry me?”and a doodle of yourself kneeling, I can’t believe you!

Oh, and PS: Yes, I will.

Love, ____.”

                                              -------------------------

Dear Chanyeol,

I’ll be moving abroad next week. Dad just told me he would be stationed somewhere in Europe. I’m sorry. We wanted to celebrate your 19th birthday together, but I guess I have to break that promise. However, I will write you as much as I can! We will stay friends. Forever, for always. You won’t get rid of me.

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol,

Okay, I just arrived at the new house. It’s not as nice as our old one, although it’s bigger. But I speak zero Spanish, I mean, except for ¡Hola señor!, but that is the biggest of my capacity. How is life? How is it without the best of the best a.k.a me? It must be boring as hell. Drink some soju for me because they only have some cerveza here. Okay, maybe I know some more than hola. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️

Dear Chanyeol, 

Can you believe it? I ate bubble gum ice cream again! You and I used to share a scoop because YOU (and I, but mostly YOU) always spent your money on these stupid trading cards and so we were broke and had to count every damn won for one damn ice cream. I felt alive. Thinking of you. Please, come to Spain someday. I still don’t know Spanish. It’s been a month. Save me, Yeol. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

I just read your letter and I won’t answer your goo texts on kakao. Pen pal is better than texting and drunk calling. At least you have to invest some money into communication here. I heard you got a job as a composer. Remember when you wrote this song for that girl from your class and she flat out rejected you? She was a dumb bitch, that song was so damn good. I hope you let some A+ singer sing it someday, it will be the biggest hit for sure. Count me in as a buyer, although it takes like two weeks for the shipping, but some killing anticipation is satanic, yet pleasing. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

Ah yeah, it wasn’t really finished yet! You mentioned that. But hey that one verse alone had me! It’s been three years since then, but I still remember it very well. Why did you never write a song for me? I feel stabbed. Just kidding, would be cool if you wrote one for me, too, someday. You know, some credit for these eighteen years I stuck with your ass. And I would have done even longer if I wasn’t stuck in Europe. But if you close your eyes, drink three beer and look at some moderate looking girl walking by, it’s basically like I am still there. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

¡Hola mi amigo! Puedo hablar un poco español por la presente… But seriously, I hate that I have to learn a new language. And they talk faster than you when you tried to rap like Zico. Imagine what their hiphop sounds like? Probably like 2x sped up triple time Eminem rap. Anyway, Dad said that I might [sic!] be able to visit you during the summer! Isn’t that great? Because I think it is. I know you have a job, I have, too, although I really suck at communicating, but I am somehow managing. Let’s meet soon. You still owe me the 3000 won for when I chugged down that warm beer and almost died. I want barbecue, and you and your freshly filled wallet cannot stop me. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Buzz Lightyeol, 

You are always so busy. You take eternities and beyond to reply. It’s been three weeks since I sent that letter. Answer me. Also, I booked the flight. It’s only for a week because my boss didn’t think I am worth of more days off, but it’s better than nothing, I guess. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

It’s okay, you were busy and your handwriting is ugly, so you take weeks to write a sentence. I forgive you. Three weeks till my flight. Fuel your wallet because I will eat a lot! Also! Jongdae became a singer!? I just went through Naver and his face popped up! Tell him that no matter what clothes he’ll wear, he’ll still remain the three-year-old boy who pissed his pants when my Dad played Santa back then. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

Honestly, fuck that I am in Seoul and my hotel is five minutes away from your apartment. This letter writing game is fun and I’ll sneakily put this in your jacket when you don’t look because I am just that level of ninja. It was a great first day out of seven. I can’t believe you got a balloon with my name on it and brought it to the airport. You are crazy, but I like that about you so much, though. Just stay crazy. Don’t be lame like Kyungsoo. I cannot believe that after eight months all he had to offer to me was a hand shake. Like? What about a hug? Money? Food? Is he broke on feelings and wallet or what? But at least you love me enough to get me a balloon. You’re the best. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

Okay but I really didn’t expect you to actually pay for the entire beef I ordered. Did you rob a bank? It’s okay, you can share your secrets and money with me. It’s so good to see your stupid face again after so long. It’s amazing how we aren’t so awkward and that I can still knock on your door at midnight with soju and watch Grey’s Anatomy. Why are you always crying, though? You watched the first five seasons at least twenty times omg. Also, I’m laughing. You still haven’t seen the first letter I hid in your pocket. You’re so oblivious, it’s actually cute. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

I apologize for being so clingy today, although you didn’t seem to mind too much. You are just very tall and even though you have the tendency to look like a child when you grin, puberty really did justice to you and not having seen you for so long made me get hit with that fact as if with a brick. You’re handsome. There. Smile, smirk, grin, I don’t care. I like you. You are cute. You are funny. You bought me food. You are my best buddy. Date me: 

 ↳ Yes [x]    No [ ]    Maybe [ ] 

I answered on behalf of you already. No stepping out. This is a contract for eternity. 

Love, your new found girlfriend. 

⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

Good that your taste doesn’t suck as much as it did back then with your old crush. What was her name again? I forgot. I can’t believe I had to literally shove the letters into your hands because you didn’t find them. It’s sad that this is already day 4/7. Like seriously, maybe I should just quit my job and life in Spain. Dad said I am old enough to move out and live my own life. I kinda want that…but I don’t want to leave my old life behind like that. It’s so hard that I have to decide between (eloping with) my boyfriend or my family. I want to have you kiss me everyday, but I can only have this for the next three days. Don’t waste your lips on beer bottles too much. You have some perfectly fine lips to kiss right in front of you. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

You’ve been my boyfriend for only two days now, but I am damn sure you are the best. Seriously, I never even mentioned going to the sea and what are you doing? You take me to the sea. What can I do? Burn toast and have you almost choke on it. And you dare to say it tasted delicious. Lying is not good, Park Chanyeol (but thank you for caring about me so much, though. You’re a jem with e and a). 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

Baekhyun is third wheeling so hard and he enjoys it. He’s very precious, you found a good substitute for the best friend position. But don’t you tall bitch dare take him for the girlfriend/boyfriend position once I depart tomorrow. I will return and chop your thumbs. Also thank you for having stayed the night. Not in that way, but for just being there. It was nice to wake up to your snoring self and atop your really comfy sweater. It’s very soft and suits you way too well for my own good. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

You looked so sad when you realized it’s our last day. I’m writing this whilst you are getting me my drink, just in case you’re wondering. Also this handwriting will be hella quick and you might not be able to read everything, but I try to be fast here. Don’t worry, I’ll come back, or you come to me. We will continue to write letters. Maybe I will FaceTime with you, too…if you’re lucky, which you are because I like you very much. Help, I don’t want to leave. I want to stay with you and watch some stupid 2 a.m tv shows and fall asleep in your arms again. There is so much I want to do, but there’s no time for now, which sucks. 

Love, ______. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

Ha! I wonder when you’ll find this letter because this is my secret letter that I didn’t place in front of your self. I stole your sweater :) and I don’t intend to return it. So you have to come to Europe to get it back! 

Love, ______. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

Okay, I’m back to Europe. Dad asked why I was smiling so much and told him that he’s at fault that I am separated from my future husband and he laughed so much, but he was happy. So don’t worry, he won’t murder you when you introduce yourself to be my boyfriend to him. I mean, it would be crazy if he blew a fuss. He basically was present at your first poop, so… 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

You haven’t answered my last letter yet, it’s only been a few days, so it’s still on the way—consider yourself lucky. Even though I really love sending letters, why am I only now hearing that you are Jongdae’s producer? He has the voice of a god! He better not mess up your masterpieces. But hey, now you have that AAA singer for that song. Oh my, I keep nagging you with it. I’m sorry. 

Love, ______. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol, 

Dad saw the letter that just came and he ran upstairs like the biggest moron and kept teasing me. What is he? Twelve? Baekhyun? He was mentioning a surprise, but who knows. My old man has been acting anything close to old currently and behaves like a child, so I can probably only expect some spoiled chocolate cake from him. How is work going? I’m sorry I didn’t take your call yesterday (although when you read this a week has probably already passed). Can mailmen be faster, please? But yeah, I was at work and I already have a strike for having been late twice. I miss you, Yeol. Your sweater began smelling more like me than you, I’m going insane. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

 Dear Chanyeol, 

I saw Jongdae on tv today! And I could have sworn you were that undeniably handsome and tall man in the back. It might already be around a month since my visit to Seoul, but you’ve been having that sassy posture since you were five years old! I see you, Park Chanyeol. Also, Jesus, don’t send food here. It will spoil on the way unless it’s chocolate or something…that lasts longer. But I’m sure your first gimbap tasted amazing when it was still edible. You can cook for me when I visit again! 

Love, _____. 

⚜️ 

Dear Chanyeol,

Mom found old pictures from kindergarten. We looked so cute in them, even Jongdae. Back then he didn’t have that shit eating grin like he has now. But you were so cute, cutest baby cheeks alive. It’s so sad that we live like miles and miles apart. I miss you so much! You should come and visit me. I could show you around a little bit.

Love, _____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol, 

You could have just told me that you would be in a music video, you know. Especially when you are looking like the biggest fuckboi in it and make out with some girl instead of having me find it on YouTube. I don’t know if I should be mad at the fact that you didn’t tell me or because you are doing stuff with that girl you never did with me. But then I tell myself that you probably didn’t choose the theme of the song or the music video. It still hurts. And I don’t know if I’m lying to myself that we work out when we’re so far away from each other. I don’t know. Maybe I just shouldn’t send this letter at all. Congratulations. The public seems to acknowledge you for your looks, acting and your musical talent. You made it. That’s the sunny side to this story, I guess.

Love, _____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

It’s alright, I’m not mad anymore. I was talking to Jongdae and he said you weren’t comfortable with the situation in the music video, and—even though he is the biggest jokester next to Byun Baekyhun—I trust him on that. You don’t have to apologize. I was just too jealous, I shouldn’t have been. It’s your job, it’s not like you grew feelings for that woman. She was probably not really comfortable either… Let’s just not dwell onto such topic, alright? I passed all my college exams for this term, I’m beat. I was studying so much that I pretty much forget that I was mad at all. You’re so lucky to be a music genius and already have a stable career and a well paid job.

Love, ____.  

⚜️ 

—–

Dear Chanyeol, 

I forgot to sent you a letter on your birthday. I’m horrible and I feel miserable. I don’t know how I can even apologize for not congratulating you and not even reacting to your texts and calls. You seemed so worried, but I couldn’t talk to anyone that day. I felt like shit, I just now I feel a little less like shit after I emptied the one or other beer. Chanyeol, it’s my mom. She cheated on my dad and they want a divorce. I’m supposed to be an adult and handle this, but they are my parents. I grew up with the idea of them being the perfect couple, that nothing could get in between them, and I thought we’d be the same. But now? It feels like everything my mom said was a lie. When she said she loved Dad and that we are the most important people for her. It hurts, Chanyeol. And I know you can’t do anything, but I also know that you will try. I don’t know when I will deal with everything better, I just don’t want you to get the wrong idea of me. I like you a lot, Park Chanyeol. It’s just hard for me to take a pen in my hand and write this all down. If you don’t hear from me anytime soon, don’t worry too much alright? I’ll be better.

Love, _____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol, 

No, just no. You don’t know what it feels like. Your parents are still together, they are not fighting and cheating on each other. They are not feeding you with lies of being together forever and loving each other, okay!? You don’t know what it feels like, and I hope you’ll never have to experience it either because it sucks. It just sucks.

Love, _____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

I realized after I sent the letter that I was overreacting. I hope this one will make it you on the same day as the one before. I’m sorry, you tried to comfort me. I shouldn’t have unleashed my frustration on you. It’s Mom’s fault and not yours. You’re never at fault, you’re the only one who hasn’t lied to me. You’re one of those people who immediately say what’s up and not hold it in forever till I find out. I value you a lot, Park Chanyeol. I want us to be together forever, unlike what happened to my parents. I want us to do better than them. And I feel like we do even though we are continents apart. 

Love, _____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

I feel even worse about what I said in that bitchy letter. How dare you just show up at my doorstep like this. How do you even have Dad’s number, and how dare he tell you the address. Just kidding, I’m glad he did. Also, why the hell am I writing you a letter when you sit right next to me. This letter game is really out of hand. Let me guess, you want the sweater I stole back, right? But you have to comfort me and go on a date with me first, else I’ll hide it forever. For how long are you staying? Just for the weekend! That’s too short. Okay, I stop this now. This is getting awkward to write.

Love, _____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol, 

You’re sleeping right now and you look super soft, but you snore so loud that I can’t sleep. Thank you for today. It was nice, everything was. From the date, to well, now. It was my first, but you probably know that, since I was the forever virgin back then. You, too, though! Sehun kept teasing us about it just because he had a girlfriend before you. What a loser. Hey, Chanyeol, I love you. You always do thing for me that no sane person would ever do. Like how back then when I was late for an exam you ate Baekhyun’s horrible cooking just to really look like you were sick…and well, from what I heard of Jongdae, you also puked on Mr. Park’s new shoes. 

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

It was good to see you again, and Jongdae called me just now saying where the fuck you are. Did you seriously book a flight without telling your boss, just because I was a devastated mess? Proves again that you’re insane! I don’t know how I even deserve you.

Also thank you for letting me keep the sweater. You were wearing it before you left. It smells like you again. Gosh that sounded cheesy. You’re infecting me with your flowery language, Park Chanyeol! Not that I mind.

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol, 

Why did I decide to study Psychology again? My head is spinning from all the revising I have to do! I just read through all the letters you sent me, I really needed a break. How is it going by the way? I was looking through Naver and I saw that Jongdae is preparing for a comeback? And apparently you are going to produce that album! Write him good songs, his voice is great. Maybe you can sneak yourself into a feature haha. I don’t know much about music, but I know that your voice sounds just perfect and you and Jongdae could really pull off a duet. Maybe get Baekhyun for it, too! He can sing well, although he was always pissing off Mrs. Choi in choir class. But she overlooked everything because he had the best voice and even when he was sick he hit all the notes. Speaking of Baekhyun, he keeps sending me wedding dress pictures and edits our heads on some Google Image wedding pictures. He’s crazy, give him a hug from me.

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

I’m not quite sure whether to classify you as dumb or cute. Seriously, Park Chanyeol? You sent a ring along with a letter with the words “will you marry me?”and a doodle of yourself kneeling, I can’t believe you!

Oh, and PS: Yes, I will.

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol, 

Honestly, it feels so weird wearing the ring and having to explain that it came by the mail. Seriosuly, Park Chanyeol, you could have just done that when you were here to visit me. Maybe it wasn’t really the best of moments, but Jesus, it would be a lie if I’d have said no then, no matter how grumpy and period cramps fueled I might have been. Also, stop Jongdae from sending me memes from We Got Married with our faces on. First Baekhyun and now Jongdae, doesn’t he have something to do? Like, singing for example? And you still haven’t told me anything about Jongdae’s comeback, and neither has he because I refuse to answer to his texts since they are all about “your boy Chanyeol wanna smooch you” and “name one child after me”. He’s ridiculous, but…if we ever have kids and one is a really big idiot with the loudest voice, sure, let’s name him Jongdae.

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

Mom called me today and I at first only wanted to hang up, but in the end I heard her out and met her with her new boyfriend…or more like the affair. I don’t like him, although he was nice to me and she seemed happy, I just can’t befriend with the idea of being all chill with the homewrecker. Is that childish of me, Yeol?

And what am I seeing there? Jongdae spammed me with his teaser pictures instead of memes, can you believe! He said that his comeback is going to take a while though, and that these teaser pictures will probably not be out till a few months. Work some faster haha. I want to listen to the masterpieces you’ve been hiding from me, your fiancee. We shouldn’t have secrets from each other, and with secrets I mean: send me your music. Nah, just kidding, you’re a perfectionist. I’ll patiently wait till Jongdae will send me all the music files the comeback.

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

Sorry for not replying so long! And don’t be confused because of the address, too! Dad is now stationed in the U.K. I finally was able to Spanish and then we’re moving again. I forgot half of the English we had in school, Chanyeol! But just saying, if Jongdae ever plans a world tour, he should come to Europe and the U.K. My personal recommendation is to go to chippie and get yourself saveloy. The best stuff you can get. I sent you a selfie of me at one of these iconic British phone boxes. Even though Spain grew to me, I like it here, too. You should definitely come and visit me.

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

Dad asked if you’d like to come over soon! He actually transformed his old hobby room into…a room just for you. He likes you a lot and he was probably even happier about that cringe proposal via mail than I was. So yeah, you have a room here now, and I’m going to be really honest here: why the heck does your room look better than mine? And it’s bigger than mine! The injustice, I’m his blood and he chooses your sorry ass over me. 

But still, Dad has always been like…dangerous when it came to boys. And here he is, waiting till the wedding we have not even planned out yet. We’re still so young and being engaged is great, too. But we’ll marry, right? I mean…you didn’t propose for nothing.

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

Dad got me into soccer, like not the playing one, but just watching. He started liking soccer already in Spain when he supported Atlético like his life depended on it. I wasn’t too interested in it back then, but hey, so many people here are into soccer and after having watched some matches with Dad, it’s actually interesting. I can finally understand Lu Han, I guess. Though not too much on the Real Madrid part? 

Tell him he should switch teams. Who needs Real when you have Hotspur or Dortmund? Who needs Ronaldo when you have Son Heung-min and Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang?

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

I just went for the mail and seriously? You bought me a Borussia Dortmund jersey and put your name on it. “I’m the true keeper and not Bürki”, cheesy much? But yeah, you are, Park Chanyeol. You are the one and only keeper, although you’d be the first to hide from the ball when you were the goal keeper. 

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Keeper, 

No, I did not ditch you for Roman Bürki haha. I’m sorry for replying so late, on phone and by letter. Dad and I went for a little vacation in the middle of nowhere—camping and father-daughter bonding, don’t ask—and there was no post office and I had zero internet, so…I’m sorry.

Also, if I won’t reply quickly, I’m currently very caught up with exams. I had to retake some because I moved and it’s all so stressful. I want to do good, so don’t worry too much.

How is everything going with Jongdae? It’s been a while since his last spam, he must be busy, too.

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

Guess who is in England and into whom I ran today? Minseok! He’s actually an exchange student, but just for a couple of weeks. His English is better than mine, I feel offended, but Minseok was always good at everything. I remember how we were all such good friends and Minseok always saved our ass when we caused trouble. Oh God, do you remember when I had such a big crush on him and I confessed to him by letter and I accidentally placed the letter in Baekhyun’s jacket? He kept annoying the shit out of me and I had to pay him way too much snacks to have him shut his big mouth. 

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

Oh my, there is no need to be jealous! I only like you, my keeper! Besides, Minseok will be off to Seoul when this letter reaches you, so it’s all good. It was just nice to talk to someone, who I actually know. It was lonely for the first weeks because I didn’t know how to interact with people. How do you get along with people so well, Yeol? Share your secrets! 

But I miss you so much! I’m wearing your sweater right now and sit in “your” room. Really, Dad put so much effort into this, you should at least sleep here like once…please?

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

I can’t believe I missed you! My aunt recently moved to Scotland, so I went to visit her there. You should have told me in advance, I’d have met up with her some other day. Dad told me immediately when I cam back. You were literally only there to sleep there once. You could have stayed longer, you know?

But it’s alright, I messed it up. Next time I’ll be there no matter what!

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

Again, sorry for replying so late. I had half of the letter written, but never sent it. So now I’m writing it again. Jongdae was texting me just now and I saw all the messages you sent me. My phone was on silent, ah, I feel so bad. Anyway, Jongdae sent me a mp3 file, some teaser for the title track! I was kind of hoping it would be that song from years ago to be honest. But this one is good, too. Very catchy, I’m proud of you, Park Chanyeol. Your birthday comes up so soon, too! I try to visit you, oh wait, that was actually meant to be a surprise. Though, let’s all be real here, Baekhyun already told you that, right?

Love, ____.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol, 

Promise me to never be mad at me! I may have lied to you. But it wasn’t because I wanted to, it’s just. Nevermind.

Love, a liar.

⚜️

Dear Chanyeol,

It sucks that your birthday always brings more pain to you than happiness ever since I moved away, twice. Surprise, I’ve been trying hard to fight. But I can’t anymore. Back then I didn’t write you for weeks because I was in hospital doing chemo. Also, my aunt never moved to Scotland, I’m sorry. I didn’t want to lie, but I wanted even less for you to worry. It was stupid. I thought everything would be fine. I really did. They told me I was doing well, I was a real fighter. But the tumor was fighting, too. When this letter arrives at yours, at your birthday, I’ll be already…gone…again. And this time I can’t write you anymore. My hand keeps shaking, so my Dad is writing this for me. I’m in hospital again. It’s so white and monotone and everything smells like Kyungsoo’s fabric conditioner basically. Yesterday, I was reading through all the letters you sent me, I even read those stupid messages you sent to my phone. Promise me not to cry. I love you. Just remember that I really do love you…so much. You’re the best person I ever shared bubble gum ice cream with, you are the best composer, best friend, best boyfriend and fiance. Thank you for everything you did for me. Thank you for saving my ass. Thank you for carrying my drunk ass around when I was far away from taking a proper step. Also sorry for having puked on your favorite converse back then. Thank you for loving such a lame person like me. Thank you for being you. Also thank you for having spent money on stamps and perfecting your handwriting to impress me. You didn’t with it, though. But the content did. You are amazing. I wish I could listen to that song you never finished again. I hope you do finish it one day and sing it yourself. Your voice is beautiful. I wish I could have you whisper “I love you” into my ear again. Park Chanyeol, thank you. 

Love, _____. 

 ⚜️ 

Dear _____, 

Guess what! I actually lied to you. I’m sorry, babe, haha. The songs I was writing weren’t for Jongdae to sing, I was just working on one of his songs. I am working on his album now, the work I did during all those months was my own album. It will be out on my birthday, when this letter will arrive along with my album. The song I once sang that you liked so much…I finished it. It’s about you, how much I love you. I hope it will be your new favorite song because this is just for you, my love, my stupid little _____. 

Love, Chanyeol.

[dramallamadingdang]

Replies!

For @tamtam-go92, @simcat81, @lady-silverwolf, @kayleigh-83, @eulaliasims, @fuzzyspork, @cindysimblr, @blackswan-sims, @celebkiriedhel, @nimitwinklesims, and @ddeathflower...

Very good looking, boy!

Yeah, I think he’s a good combination of his parents. His dad got all of the extremes of Goopy and Sandy’s faces and so was very extreme himself. Andrew got some of that but softened by his mother’s smaller, more delicate features. I think of their three kids they had together, he’s the one that’s the most “blended” in terms of combining the parents’ facial features.

simcat81 replied to your photoset “This is something that I wanted. Not sure how wide of an appeal it’ll...”

What is that sc4 terrain in your preview pics? It looks pretty!

Well, there are several different ones there. :) My testing neighborhood is the Desiderata Valley terrain. GilsCarburg is on Phaenoh’s “Sand Simoleon Point.” The Air Force Base (the most heavily-decorated one) is on this one. And the other one is this one. I tend to fiddle with terrains using the modifyneighborhoodterrain cheat, though. I did a lot of “custom sculpting” in the AFB neighborhood, especially.

lady-silverwolf replied to your photoset “This is something that I wanted. Not sure how wide of an appeal it’ll...”

Looks Fabulous! I love CuriousB's set as well, but I think I like this one much better for a modern hood. Almost looks like a true lush green.

Yeah, it’s kind of like “suburbia green,” the kind you get when you have a group of neighbors who are all obsessive about landscaping and mowing their lawns and stuff like that, all in order to keep up with and/or out-landscape the neighbors. Or, it’s like “sod farm green.” I confess that I looked at some images of sod farms online when I was fiddling with the color. It’s still a little blue-r than that, but that’s kind of what I wanted. I was tired of the yellow-green of CuriousB’s textures -- and Maxis is even worse in that regard -- so I erred more on the blue side of green. Maybe it’s all Kentucky bluegrass! :)

kayleigh-83 replied to your photo “While his mother was…somewhere…Owen teened up. He’s Fortune/Pleasure,...”

If all your Sims want to become Criminal Masterminds, I think it's clear the universe is telling you that their family is forming into some kind of mafia! How excellent!

Yeah, it’s pretty awesome. But also kind of ridiculous. “Let’s be crime lords of this tiny town of, like, five houses! So big time!” *laugh*

eulaliasims replied to your photo “Ghost-of-Steven makes himself useful. I think we’ll keep him.”

Cleaning ghosts are the best ghosts! Much better than the whiny ones. :P

Generally, I have a policy of packing ghosts off to a cemetery after a few hauntings, but I confess that I’ll let cleaning ghosts stay right where they are. :)

fuzzyspork replied to your audio post “So here’s something completely different! A friend of mine, a luthier,...”

So pretty! The Enya song that always gets stuck in my head is Sail Away. And somehow this got it stuck in my head. D: I'm not even an Enya fan! Fun Fact: the last apartment we lived in before we bought this house had an elderly woman and her middle aged daughter living next door. They played Enya constantly. And I know this because they played it at TOP FREAKIN VOLUME. I kept imagining them over there languidly head banging.

LOL! I dunno, I tend to think that if someone’s blasting Enya, they’re probably not head-banging. They’re probably attempting to float ethereally around their house in flowing white dresses with big bell sleeves. :) (All that reverb and overdubbing, oy!) Sorry for sticking Enya in your head, though. It very well might have been that “Sail Away” song that got stuck in mine. It was just, like, 10 years ago, so I don’t really remember anymore.

cindysimblr replied to your photo “Ghost-of-Steven makes himself useful. I think we’ll keep him.”

What? I've never seen them do something like this!

They’ll do it if they had a lot of Cleaning points in life. And I think they need to be happy, too, not grumpy. So, like, their bed still has to exist. (I dunno why that’s so important to ghosts, but...Well, it is.) Steven not only mops up cat pee that didn’t make it into a litterbox, but he cleans all the toilets in the house, too.

blackswan-sims replied to your post “Music Shuffle Meme”

Yaasss, Within Temptation! *high fives* Symphonic metal's a major weakness of mine too.

Yeah, it’s very operatic. And since A) I like opera and B) Opera was the heavy metal of its time, that’s only fitting. :) I’d kind of like it if there were some bands with male singers, though. I mean, I know the whole “thing” (if it’s not instrumental like a Trans-Siberian Orchestra sort of thing) is “operatic” soprano + metal band, but it’d be nice if there were, say, “operatic” tenor + metal band versions. :) If such exists, I don’t know about it...

celebkiriedhel replied to your audio post “So here’s something completely different! A friend of mine, a luthier,...”

I love harp music. When I was young (a child) it was the instrument that I wanted to learn.

I learned it a bit later in life, actually. I was never really interested before, but I was doing some teaching at a folk music camp for a couple summers in the early 90s, and at the beginning of the first session, the faculty got together for a meet-and-greet/jam. At some point, we ended up exchanging instruments, and I found myself with a lever harp and kind of fell in love with it. I rented a harp and took the classes at the camp, and when it was done, I bought a harp, found a teacher, and took some lessons and...Yeah, here we are. :) It’s fairly easy to learn if you already have a piano background, but even if you don’t it’s not bad. You just need strong fingers. The hard part is actually finding a teacher. Well, that and harps are pretty expensive. :\ Here in the US, a decent-quality one of a decent size (36+ strings) will run you about ~$3000, used. (That’s for a lever harp; pedal harps are more.) But I like lever harps a lot better, myself. I prefer their more folky/Celtic sound.

nimitwinklesims replied to your photoset “Can you see the edges of the terrain? Can you tell what’s actually...”

Ooh, nice! Although lot view does look a bit silly. But hey, I guess with that default I linked to it would look better, as it uses the same texture there!

Yeah, it probably would look nice with @an-elegant-simblr‘s Realistic Grass. I haven’t put that in my testing game yet to check it out, but I probably will at some point.

ddeathflower replied to your photo “Tryin’ to put some mountains more in the distance. Not sure how...”

One small criticism would be that the horizen should be lighter. Otherwise it looks great!

Yeah, normally I put a bit of a glow on the top of edge of horizons. It lightens it and softens the transition between horizon and sky. But in this case, the tops of the mountains are too close to the edge of the texture to apply a glow! So, I’m experimenting with slight transparency, instead.

[sarcatichearts-blog]

Sorority Rush and Tips

Rush week...oh what fun. 

Lets get say what I pictured rush week to be was way different than what it actually was for me. Now all schools might give you a different experience but it’s all the same concept. So here are the basics...

 Every girl rushing is referred to as a PNW which stands for Potential New Member, and every girl is put into a group of 15-20 (by last names) and is assigned a recruitment counselor. Your RC (recruitment counselor) is already a member of a sorority but has to keep the house she belongs to a secret so she doesn’t influence anyones decision. You absolutely can not talk about the houses you do and don’t like with any other girl or you might get dropped. I’m serious, don’t do it. Even if you trust someone with your dog’s life, someone could overhear you and taddle on you. Oh and also, rush is a dry week...no alcohol or anything else thats fun, so have fun.

At my school, the week was broken down into different sets, like this:  

Set 1 (Monday & Tuesday): meet all 13 houses

Set 2 (Wednesday): learn about their philanthropy

Set 3 (Thursday): house tours

*We got Friday off*

Pref Night (Saturday): Visit the two houses you come down to and pick one

Bid Day (Sunday): get your bid and meet your sisters!

If your school is a bit smaller, or greek life isn’t as prominent, your rush week might happen during school, not the week before like a lot of other institutions so the sets might be set up differently...idk.

Anyways, sets 1, 2, and 3 are basically the same. You’re just speed dating a bunch of girls. Fun right? And chances are you’re going to get asked “What’s your major?” or “Where are you from?” or “How do you like rush so far?” at lest 3000 times a day during these sets so just grin and bear it, the fun stuff will come later.

After set 1 you start picking the houses you liked the best and drop the ones you didn’t. HOWEVER, a house has to invite you back for you to be able to keep them. At U of A, we had to go from 13 houses to 9 and often times, a lot of girls didn’t get invited back to all 9 houses they chose. And that is perfectly normal no matter how butt hurt you might feel.

After set 2 we had to go from 9 (if you had 9) to 6 houses. I got dropped from my second favorite house after set 2 and MAN was I livid. I had great conversations with the girls in that house and they made it seem like they really vibed with me, but thats exactly what they’re trained to do...so don’t get too bent out of shape if this happens to you as well.

After set 3 was when we had to go from 6 to 2 houses. This was pretty hard especially if you had good connections with 3 houses like I did. I had no idea which house to drop but I knew in the back of my head which house I ultimately wanted in the end so I dropped the house that I didn’t have as well of conversations as the other two houses. 

Now it’s pref night. The most intimate and in my opinion, the most fun. We dressed up in cocktail attire and went to our final two houses where the houses  were decorated and they served us lemonade instead of water, the best. You talk to the person who “prefed” you (who wanted you to make it to this night) and at my school, the seniors talked about their experiences in the sorority and sang songs. A lot of tears were shed. THEN, after you go to both houses you have to pick just one. Scary. A lot of girls knew exactly which house they wanted and it took them a blink of an eye to make their decision, but others took hours to make their final choice. If you ever think to yourself, “What if I make a mistake and want the other house instead,” just trust the process. think back on the whole week and remember what impressions they left on you and the values each house had. It can be very nerve racking but you’ll end up in the house you belong. But also be prepared, the house you choose might not give you a bid in return and you could end up with your second choice or no bid at all (but that rarely happens so don’t fret).   

Bid Day is SO fun. Theres no more small talk with hundreds of girls everyday and no more stressing about which house to chose, because now you’re pledging one. Bid day for me was awesome, everyone met with their RC groups and gathered in McKale (our basketball stadium). There were over 3K girls there.. you could see all the excitement and anticipation in the air. But before we opened our bids, we all guessed which house our RC was in. Then they all lined up in front of us. Every RC sang the first house’s recruitment song and when the song ended, the RC’s in that house stayed standing while the rest of them crouched on the ground. After all the houses sang their songs, we finally opened our bids and left the stadium with the other girls in our new pledge class and the RC’s that were in our new houses took us to a venue where we met the rest of the girls in the house and hung out. 

Alright, so i’ve explained what the basics of rush week are and even shared some of my experience...now here are some tips.

August is probably one of the hottest months of the year, and it’s when a lot of schools start so battling the heat while trying to look cute was a STRUGGLE. It was 107 degrees during the rush week...something I was not even close to used to coming from California. It literally felt like satan sat his ass down on Tucson and didn’t get up until November. So sweating is bound to happen, especially if you have one house at one end of the row and then another house 10 minutes later at the complete opposite end. SOOO

1.) Wear water proof mascara, no one wants to talk to a raccoon

2.) Use setting spray

3.) Hair spray your hair if you curled it

4.) If you used concealer to conceal anything, bring that with you. It will melt off.

5.) Don’t wipe the sweat off, BLOT it off. No smudging here

6.) Bring deodorant, lots of it

7.) Wear sunscreen, theres no need to look like a lobster after 5 mins in the sun

At my school, our RCs had backpacks with deodorant, sun screen, perfume, mints, and coffee filters. Coffee filters?! What are those doing in there? Well since you asked...they are absolute life savers when it comes to getting the sweat off your face without ruining your make up. They soak it right up and leave you looking like you did in the morning with your perfect make up.

 The last couple pieces of advice that I will leave you are simple, 

1.) Go into the week with an open mind. No matter what you’ve heard about a house or if you have friends or family members in it, experience each house without any pre existing thoughts or feelings. It will make your experience a lot better and you truly will find the house where you belong.

2.) Buy blister band-aids now. The hours in heels will destroy your poor little feet. Trust me, I have the scars to prove it.

3.) Be polite and respectful. The days are long and tiering for you, I know, but its also long and tiering for the girls in the houses already too. They want you to like them just as much as you want them to like you, so keep that in mind. 

Have a blast!

Even though the days are long and hot, you only go through this week once. Thank God.