#and hes had an incredibly tough season honestly the beginning of his season might be the worst both mentally and physically for any player

[mousemannation]

[x]

[misshoneyimhome]

Idk why but I need some Willy angst…like you met at the end of last season and decided to officially start dating in the off season spending it all together in Europe but once you’re back in Toronto and the season starts you feel like he’s lost interest or is embarrassed by you because he doesn’t want you going out in public with him nor does he introduce you to the team and other WAGs. And Willy does it because he’s worried the public eye and comments will be horrible to you so he wants to keep you away from that and emulate the chiller lifestyle you got to have in Sweden but he can’t communicate his reasoning so you tell him you want to end things because you can’t love someone who doesn’t want to be seen with you and he breaks down, and it’s the first time you see him cry🥲

Well, to be fair we all need a little Willy angst once in a while 😉 I absolutely love the idea bb! And I hope you’ll enjoy reading it, just as much as I did writing it ❤️

➼｡ﾟ

Gonna give it to you, in capital letters | William Nylander

"We need to talk…"

A message nobody wants to get, and definitely not one William Nylander ever expected to receive. Especially not at this particular moment.

_

You’d met William last season, just before the playoffs, at a coffee shot downtown and quickly, you’d developed a connection of some sort.

Initially, it was a relaxed and easy-going friendship, kept low-key as you had recently ended a relationship, and casual due to William's hectic schedule.

Nevertheless, it was a strong friendship.

But then, gradually, things started to escalate a bit. You stood by William throughout the playoffs on the sideline, offering support, aa you both simply relished each other's company. Thus, what began as a casual friendship, involving late-night conversations and casual coffee meet-ups, gradually shifted towards something more intimate and physical.

As William faced the highs and lows of the games, dealing with intense stress on good and bad days, you remained a constant source of support for him. Usually, you were his go-to for random talks. However, one night, after a particularly tough loss, he felt a need for more, and made a move on you.

It was subtle, neither too eager nor forceful. He merely became a bit touchier and more sensual in his tone and behaviour, melting you completely under his touch.

Admittedly, William was undeniably attractive. Most people thought so, and you were no exception. However, despite the cheeky banter, friendly flirting, and shared laughter, you both maintained a platonic relationship until that fateful evening.

And it was nothing short of incredible.

The sex had been gentle and sensual at first, before you’d both been eager to explore each other further, and soon it had become rather heated and intense.

Yet, it also resulted in something more.

At first, you reckoned William probably just needed some physical release due to all the ups and downs of the matches. But as it turned out, he longed for much more than that. William seemed to want you around all the time, or at least to swing by late in the evening after games or when he returned from away matches.

It kind of felt like you were his dirty little secret, but honestly, you didn't dwell on it much. His schedule was all over the place, not your typical 9-to-5 routine, so you didn't read too much into it. Well, at least not in the beginning.

And just when you were thinking it might be a good idea to chat about what was going on between you two - not that you were necessarily in need to put a label on it, you just wanted to know if William was still keen on you - he completely surprised you by inviting you to join him in Europe during the off-season.

Initially, you were a bit taken aback and hesitant since you'd only been going out with him for a few months. But William was persistent, and since the idea sounded pretty intriguing, you thought, "Why not?" and decided to go with it.

And boy, were you glad you did.

Your time in Sweden was absolutely amazing. William showed you all around Stockholm, shared his favourite spots and eateries, introduced you to Sweden's hidden gems, and treated you like royalty.

He whisked you away for romantic dinners, really putting on his a-game in the dating department. And before long, he opened up about wanting you to be his. Which in casual-Swedish-27-year-old-guy speak, basically meant you were now dating seriously.

You were over the moon about your time in Scandinavia. You witnessed a different side to the easy-going forward, experienced his more tender side first hand, and had mind-blowing sex for weeks.

And then, just when you thought that was it, he took you to other European places. Places you'd never even heard of and couldn't quite pronounce, making you feel like you were in a fairy tale - so much so that you had to pinch yourself to believe it was all real.

However, despite the pinching, your fairy-tale had to come to an end at some point, and you had to return to reality and everyday life in Toronto.

But returning to Toronto turned out to be way different from what you had expected.

William, the guy you'd just spent over a month with every single day, suddenly kept his distance and limited your interactions to phone calls or late-night chats after training and games.

It felt odd.

You genuinely believed that during the off-season, you both had connected on a deeper, more intimate level, taking your relationship several steps further. But William's actions contradicted those feelings.

He didn't take you out for dinners anymore, nor did he seem interested in meeting up during the day or having you over if there was a chance someone else might be around.

Even when you mentioned being at the arena to support him during a home game, he just told you to head straight to his place instead of waiting for him while he finished showering.

It was like you were suddenly back to being his secret, hidden even from those closest to him: his teammates.

When you were alone, he talked about them incessantly, sharing every little detail about his teammates, the ones he was closest to, and those he felt played best with him. Yet, it felt like he didn't want them to know anything about you.

And before long, you'd had enough.

William was an incredible guy, and your feelings for him ran deep. But this situation was becoming uncomfortable and unpleasant. It felt somewhat absurd that he could be jovial and happy around you at any hour, but as soon as you weren't snug in his condo, you became a stranger to him. Or someone he'd call just to chat.

In a way, you felt ridiculed. And eventually, you decided to take the mature step, safeguarding yourself from potential heartache by ending it.

However, you wanted to handle it properly, so you texted him to arrange a meeting.

_

"Hey, can we meet up sometime soon? We need to talk…"

Across the city, William felt a pang in his heart as he read your text.

He had just finished today's workout and was about to head for a shower when he saw your message, causing him to gulp in an attempt to remain composed in the locker room.

However, his expression didn't go unnoticed by his teammates.

"Hey, everything okay, Willy?" Auston asked, a hint of concern in his eyes as he observed his Swedish teammate.

"Yeah…" William attempted to reply, but his tone lacked conviction, after reading your text multiple times.

"You're sure?"

And William knew he couldn't hide the truth from his closest friends.

"No… it's y/n…" He let out a deep sigh.

"Is she okay?" the team's captain, John Tavares, chimed in, wearing a slightly concerned, paternal expression.

"I don't know… she just sent me 'the text'…" he spoke softly, trying to conceal any hints of disappointment, though failing when he showed your message to the boys.

"Ooh… that's the worst…" Auston replied, attempting a light hearted comment to lighten the mood. "That can only mean one of two things: either she's dumping you… or she's knocked up."

However, despite Auston's attempt at humour, it did little to alleviate the situation. So instead, Tavares stepped in, offering his support.

"She probably just wants to talk about your relationship," he said, flashing a reassuring, warm smile. "Making sure you're still into each other, you know, communication."

William tried to reciprocate the kind smile and nodded lightly.

"Yeah, that's not exactly my greatest talent…"

"I know, so maybe this is your chance," the elder teammate suggested. And with those comforting words in mind, William agreed to meet you at his condo in 20 minutes. He then quickly wrapped up in the locker room and made his way out.

As William made his way back home, a strange sensation settled in his chest. He had never faced a situation where a girl might be pregnant despite using protection – at least not to his knowledge. Additionally, he couldn't quite comprehend why you suddenly wanted to end things with him.

And this was a new scenario for him. Typically, he would be the one ending things with girls, sending them the text about how things weren't working out. But now, finding himself potentially on the receiving end of a breakup, he couldn't quite wrap his head around it.

So, when you stood in front of him in his living room, tears threatening to spill, William felt another tug at his heart.

"Willy," you spoke softly, attempting to sound confident and self-assured, despite having rehearsed this moment multiple times, knowing you most likely wouldn't be able to remain composed. "I think we need to stop seeing each other…"

You felt the tears welling up but tried to hold them back by controlling your breathing.

"Y/n… I don't understand… I mean, why? I thought we were having a good time," William replied, matching your subdued tone.

"I think we both know why…" You silently hoped he would reach the same conclusion as you, but William's thoughts were far from aligning with yours.

In his mind, William ran through potential reasons you might have: Your schedule is too busy and unpredictable,' You’re away too often,' 'I’ve found someone else,' or 'I just don't have feelings for you.' 

However, your actual words were far from what he anticipated.

"I know you're embarrassed about me… and I just can't love someone who doesn't want to be seen with me or introduce me to their closest friends… you're keeping me as a secret, and I know I can't ignore my feelings for you, which only makes it even more hurtful… But I'm tired of feeling ridiculed by this… so, I can't be with you anymore…"

You’d given up on holding back your tears midway through your heartfelt speech, letting them stream down your cheeks as you spoke from the depths of your heart, despite the aching pain in your chest.

William was baffled. Embarrassed? You believed he was embarrassed about you.

His eyes widened, fixed directly on you as his mind scrambled to form comforting words, to assure you that this wasn't the truth. But the words seemed trapped, unable to escape his lips.

"And although it hurts like hell," you continued, briefly looking upwards, trying to gather your tears, and sniffled lightly. "I try to understand. I mean, we had a wonderful time during the off-season when you had plenty of time. But we were away from this normal, everyday life, and you didn't have all those girls around like you do here… so perhaps, you've just lost interest in me since coming back, which is okay – I mean, I can't change the way you feel… I just…" You took in a deep breath, gathering the courage to continue. "I just wish you'd told me, so I wouldn't look like a fool, like I do now…"

Silence enveloped the room after your heartfelt confession, your voice almost cracking near the end of your final words. 

But William's mind was in complete disarray. And your words cut deep within him as he realised the weight of his actions.

"Fuck…" he softly mumbled to himself, briefly looking down before meeting your gaze.

Your body seemed to fold into itself, arms wrapped around your chest in a stance of defeat and vulnerability. Your eyes held a soft yet sorrowful expression, and William could tell you were truly hurt.

And as he had admitted to Tavares, William wasn't the greatest at expressing his emotions. But now, he was beginning to realise the extent of the damage caused by his lack of communication. And this was his chance, as the captain had mentioned.

Taking a deep breath, he tried to find the necessary words.

"Y/n… I'm not… I'm not embarrassed about you," William's chest felt heavy, emotions stirring within him. "Shit…" He threw his arms up in frustration, finding it immensely difficult to speak. "It hurts like hell hearing you say that… Why would you think I'm embarrassed about you? Or that I've lost interest in you?"

His words came out sharper than he intended, emotions bubbling to the surface, as he couldn't contain his frustration, realising that he was the cause of your pain. 

"Because you don't want to be seen with me anywhere… you only want me around here, in hiding, and you never want me to meet any of your friends and teammates, Willy…" Your voice rose as you cried out, mirroring his frustrations.

"I'm just trying to protect you, y/n!" William almost shouted, surprising you with the intensity of his response. "I just… I want to keep you safe and away from all of that!"

"Protect me from what, Willy? Because from what I can see, you don't want to be seen with me or let anyone know that we're dating," you firmly shouted back, not entirely convinced by his defence.

"That's not at all how it is! You don't get what it's like."

"Then please explain to me what it's like!"

William took a deep breath, struggling to control his emotions from boiling over. You were pushing all the right buttons, and he knew you had every right to do so.

"People can be cruel, y/n… the media, people online… and I don't want you to experience that," he exhaled. "I'm NOT embarrassed about you, GOD, I can't believe you'd think that… I just – I want to shield you from all the awful things people say about me… and other players and their girlfriends… I fucking love being with you, and the last thing I want is for you to be scared away by those who post hurtful comments online or make up lies to stir up drama between us…"

Now, it was William feeling the tears welling up.

"But then why wouldn't you even introduce me to the team? You always talk so much about them, but for some reason, you don't want them to know about me! Don't you see how that makes me feel?"

William sensed himself becoming overwhelmed, realising the depth of the situation, and he couldn't hold back any longer. A tear escaped and trailed down his cheek, as he tried his best to explain. 

"I didn't want to drag you into my world, y/n! It can be messed up, and you deserve so much better…" His voice cracked, tears flowing uncontrollably.

And witnessing William cry evoked a wave of emotions within you.

You had never seen him even close to tears. In fact, you had never seen him display anger or hurt, nothing beyond hockey, and even that only extended to minimal frustrations. William was always known for his calm and composed demeanour, never letting his facade crack. Yet tonight, you had cracked him wide open, causing him to spill his thoughts and feelings.

"All I wanted was to keep everything easy going and wonderful between us… just like it was in Sweden. It was so perfect, and when I realised you were the one, I wanted to be with, I guess I just tried to do whatever I could to keep it that way… so you wouldn't leave me."

“Willy,” you softly breathed out. “Why didn’t you tell me all of this? That this was how you felt…”

Your question resonated with the right reason, prompting a timid smile to form on his lips as he let out a sigh.

"Because I'm not good at this… explaining everything and talking… feelings, y/n…" he softly admitted, your eyes locking in a heartfelt moment of deep honesty.

Relaxing your tense posture, a bit, you slowly moved towards him, flashing a soft smile.

“Willy, I want to be with you… I know I don’t fully understand your world, but it’s part of you, and… I want all of you, no matter what,” you reassured him, coming to stand so closely that your bodies gently touched.

William sniffled before managing to form proper sentences, briefly looking downwards as his hands found their way to rest on your hips.

“I’m sorry, y/n… I just thought it was better to keep you away from it, you know…”

“I know, those were your best intentions,” you softly smiled, gently resting your hands on his chest. “But Willy, if you really want me around, in your life, you have to let me in… for better AND for worse…” 

“I do, y/n… I do want you in my life… I just don’t want you to be scared away,” he timidly admitted.

“Don’t worry, babe. It takes more than that for me to leave,” you tried to ease the tension, and fortunately it seemed to work.

“Good…” William sighed in relief, his forehead gently meeting yours.

“Just promise me one thing,” you said, looking up at him again.

“Anything.”

“Next time if you have these kinds of thoughts, please just tell me… I can’t read your mind, and I NEED you to let me know what’s going on inside that pretty big brain of yours,” you chuckled lightly. “You have to use your words – in capital letters, please,” you emphasised, prompting a chuckle from William as well.

“I promise I’ll try to do better,” he replied with a smile, before leaning down and placing a gentle kiss on your soft lips.

It was a huge relief for him to finally get everything off his chest. Realising that this was mostly due to his not-so-well-thought-out plan, he now saw a great chance of having you in his life for much longer.

“By the way,” William suddenly added as your faces withdrew slightly. “The team does know about you… in fact, they know all about you.”

“What!?”

“Yeah, so really, you haven’t actually been that much of a secret…” he chuckled, seeing your baffled reaction. “But I guess that’s just one less thing for us to check off then.” 

“You’re really something special Nylander… did you know that?” you chuckled lightly.

“Yeah, and now I’m yours something special,” you merely replied, before pulling you in for a deeper and more heartfelt kiss this time. 

[cuppajj]

Hmm. Honestly all 5 of my ocs are like a box set, and not even in the IDW continuity but:

Name: Skysmasher.

Alt: Bomber Jet (I don't draw well but she looks a lot like bomber megatron)

Personality: Cold, Logical, Cynical, (clinically depressed) apathetic, arrogant (imagine her as this, snooty high class kid, basically). Gets grumpy when people make fun of her name.

Story: She's a decepticon commander, though she was constructed almost at the end of the war (which the cons won in this verse. You ever read Eugenesis? Its like the setting at the beginning). Her life started off in chaotic violence, which she was very good at, and when she was declared a war hero at the end, she had to quickly get used to equally violent politics. She's done a dozen horrible things to keep her place in this world. There's an itch in her heart that she's trying not to scratch, out of fear of what will come out. She's used to dealing with monsters; if the war had lasted one more day, she might have become one.

She has two friends who she keeps trying to get a promotion, but Moonshine is a secret Starscream lovechild clone who lives off drinks other cons buy him, and Steelfinger is an incredibly autistic brawler who leans into the 'dumb brute' act because that's easier than trying to get any understanding here. So good luck.

She gets better tho! Becomes a much nicer person, gets the shit kicked out of her by Tarn, and lives to fall for not one but two autobots.

How she'd react to Drillburst: There's gonna be some awkwardness because how do deal with poor people. Or civilians. If she saw him fight well, then she'd probably really respect his cool mercenary moves. The mercenary thing, she probably understands all about fighting just being something you do, just as a job. As for everything with Overlord... depending on how much she knows, in order, Admiration (at his perceived toughness), pity/commiseration, horror/resignation.

Oh, and Steelfinger and Foxlock both sing well, so she'd probably think that's cool as heck too.

Sorry if this is too long! Love your art btw <3

Oooh!

Drillburst would probably be turned off. Post war, he’s still trying to overcome his biases about well-seasoned Autobots and Decepticon warriors, so it would take a while for them to start bonding, especially since Skysmasher seems to embody a lot of what he dislikes about Decepticon elite (apathetic, arrogant, snooty).

For her to have known his mercenary prowess, she would’ve had to see him while the war was still going on; and if they did see each other then, then maybe they’d be a little familiar to each other after the war… However, if they did, maybe Sky would looked at drill more favorably than he would at her :’D

The only thing i could see him respecting about her off the bat is her remorse for those she’s killed, which he gets (and if she learned about his plight in G9 and expressed sympathy, he’d thank her although be unsure how genuine she is). If she starts expressing signs of, well, not-apathy and self-interest, maybe there’s a chance they could bond… but for right now, Sky has a hard time with civilians and Drill has a hard time with arrogant warriors (overlord did not help in that regard LOL).

He’d probably get along with her friends more easily, but it depends!

[gra-sonas]

ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: Was the year time jump because of the pandemic? To sidestep making that too central to the plot, or was that always the plan?

JEANINE MASON: That was always our intention and it was just sort of a saving grace in that way. We also don't acknowledge the pandemic in real-time on our show. There are no masks and that was just so wonderful just to get work in that way and have that time where it was a little more normal. Also, that's just our show — we want you to come to us the way you always do, which is for nineties nostalgia, sexy Cowboys, brilliant scientists, you know? CHRIS HOLLIER: So we wanted to drop our characters in a year later, let them stew in their individual decisions that were made last season. We want everyone to root for our poster couple but we want to honor what happens in real life, which is sometimes you step away from that person, even if you are entwined with them in a very particular way. So we wanted it to be a real enough time and distance so that they could live a little life on their own.

With showrunner Carina Adly MacKenzie departing at the end of season 2, has much changed? Or are you still working with ideas she had in place?'

HOLLIER: It's a little bit of both. There are things that Carina and I built that live all the way through and then once the story got up on its feet, discoveries were made with our new crop of people that we were like, "Oh, we're going to bend it this other way."

Jeanine, how is Liz doing in her new life in L.A. when we pick up this season?

MASON: Well, it's been a year and at this point, her life is actually pretty great. She just hasn't taken a second to acknowledge that. She's doing what she does best, which is just full head in her work and trying to figure out what she could use of her discoveries and her brilliance to save Maria. She has a great job, a really nice place, and an awesome partner at work who is a good time and a real match for her in terms of intellect and ambition. He begins to ask her to recognize that and to maybe give something a chance that she's been reluctant to because of how drawn she is to Roswell and to Max. It's a fun first episode. It's sexy. It's fun to find opportunities for her. She's our hero so she's got a lot on her shoulders and anytime where we can find levity for her is always a real treat for the writers and for me.

And no Crashdown waitress uniform must be nice?

MASON: Honestly, I miss it quite a lot right now. I have a note in my notes with Chris, I'm like, "I gotta tell him we gotta find him more opportunities for it."

Should Liz and Max shippers be worried about them finding their way back to one another after he destroyed her work and didn't follow her to L.A.? Should we resign ourselves to a season apart?

MASON: This season really is about these characters having themselves mirrored to each other. Max and Liz need some growing and ultimately they can't do anything but be orbiting each other. We found so many opportunities to have such a beautiful language around the cosmic element of their connection. They're asking, "Is this our decision, or are we just acting off of a decision that the cosmos made for us?" It was so fun to navigate that. I always have such a good time with Chris Hollier and with Nathan Dean, just finding the little tiny notches, a tiny bit of movement towards where they're going next. I really loved following them. It's my favorite Max and Liz season to date.

HOLLIER: It's not a season apart. I'll tease that they, in an unexpected way, end up in front of each other relatively soon. But it's really about when am I ready? And what does it mean to talk to my ex? When someone makes such a big influence in your life, when do you know it's over and when do you know you should fight again? We tried to give them real grown-up lives.

Steven Krueger (The Originals) also joined the cast as Heath this season. What can you tease about his character?

HOLLIER: He's just an awesome human being. I know him from The Originals and we were like, "If we're going to have to be stuck with people in the desert, who do we want?" You want to be stuck with a handsome and lovely and charming Steven Krueger. So really this was looking at, "Well, what did Liz want and what does it look like when you start to give Liz versions of what she wants?" Heath is somebody that is beyond being just a lovely person, he is smart and wants to advance science and that's appealing to Liz. It becomes, "What does it look like when the man that I hang around with all day is also into the same things that I am?" MASON: I love him. Heath is just such a fun, whip-smart, fantastic character. His humor was so fun. We've been having a good time with kicking the humor up really through season two and in season three, we just took it up another notch. There are some moments that are like, "Is this a drama or is it a sitcom?" Looking back on it, he was such a fun partner to spar with. They're both such intellectual characters and I love that there's a real meeting of the minds. It makes it competitive and sexy. I know a lot of fans are so excited because they know him from The Originals and he's going to be a great addition.

Technically, Mr. Jones is a new character too. Can you tell us anything at all about him?

HOLLIER: I'd say he's a new character — and a fully-fleshed interesting new character. Mr. Jones has an awesome beard. At some point, he might lose that beard. A lot of people are asking me, "Is Jones good or bad?" And what I would argue is that's a perspective based upon who you are in the conversation that you're having with him. He knows a lot about our heroes' story and he knows a lot about home. He'll be able to answer questions for them. This season our heroes will get to learn why they ended up here on earth. One of the things I think that people will love is that they're going to get to see that home planet this year. We asked ourselves a lot about this whole season, "What have we set up for the past two?" We look at these first three seasons almost like a trilogy so a lot of things are going to be paid off.

Has Nathan enjoyed pulling double duty this season? Or is he just exhausted?

MASON: He's exhausted, but he's such a champ. That really is the beginning of this mirroring thing that starts with Max and Jones with him actually getting to look at himself to a degree and those questions that come up. The self-analysis that it provokes in him is really the beginning of what is happening to all of our characters this year; everybody's being confronted with themselves. I loved that the Max/Jones of it was also a real sci-fi element.

Did he really grow that beard or was that not possible if he had to go between the two characters?

MASON: That was a prosthetic beard and our makeup team killed it. He was not accustomed to early mornings, which, of course, all of us babes are. It was a lot of extra time in the chair for him.

Can Jones dupe Liz into thinking he's actually Max since she doesn't know he exists?

MASON: You're totally on to something. It's a real and pressing threat. I mean, she's totally in the dark and he looks like her cosmic lover!

HOLLIER: What I will say is that, Liz — beyond her being number one on the call sheet — is integral to this story in a way that she and none of our characters are going to perceive when they start episode one. We're bringing [the characters] to a new crossroads moment in their lives and they're getting, through Jones, a mirror into their own lives to decide what they're going to become next.

How's Rosa (Amber Midthunder) doing this season?

MASON: By the end of season two, Rosa really makes the decision to start taking care of herself. She really becomes an incredible asset to the Scooby-Doo gang. It's something that Liz is in constant adjustment to. As much as she's the younger sister, she feels very protective of her sister and Liz has had to make adjustments in her trust and faith in Rosa. I loved it because it just felt like a real personal, authentic thing that sisters would go through, but also that Hispanic sisters would go through. I think we sometimes, culturally, have a tendency to baby our women — maybe that's the wrong word — but just to underestimate their physical ability and what they might take on, and sort of 'queen' our women in a way where we treat them tenderly. I hate that. I'm a tough bitch and so is Rosa. So Liz has to confront that and go, "I'm an idiot to underestimate you. You've done nothing but prove me wrong."

What about Maria and her visions?

HOLLIER: This year I think Maria has the most complete arc of any season, as she recognizes things about herself that cause more questions about who she is, who her family is, how she's linked to this story. We dive into it in the present-day and we dive deliciously back in time too.

In the exclusive clip above we see her have a vision of a funeral, can you tease anything about who potentially might be about to die?

HOLLIER: Maria is front and center in driving the first half of the mystery for us. She's burdened with trying to figure out whose death she is seeing. It takes a few episodes to unravel and we use it to ask, is this linked to our supernatural stories or real-world stories that are going on politically? Is it bad luck? Is it herself? There's a whole gambit at play. We joke that we solved a past murder, now we're going to try to stop one.

Can Malex (Michael and Alex) shippers have hope that this might finally be their time?

HOLLIER: What I would say is that I think that Malex fans are really going to dig this journey. We, as writers, put them at the same level of importance as Max and Liz. So we wanted to really honor the next step in what they may or may not be. How did they grow up and how did they have those hard conversations just like Liz and Max are going to have?

Is Isobel going to continue to date women this season?

HOLLIER: Isobel is going to go on a more personal journey. You got to love yourself before you can love someone else. We lean into those possibilities by the end of who she might love. It's not something that is dropped all season — it is something that you'll see. We play some romantic comedy stuff with her character this year and with Maria that I think fans are gonna dig. There's a lot going on in the world and wanted to pump some humor and hope into it.

Will see more of Liz fighting to challenge the perception of the Latinx community?

MASON: I think that just by nature of it being one of such few shows that are led by a Latin woman, it's always going to be, to an extent, a protest or an assertion of the space that I get to fill and that Liz Ortecho gets to fill on network TV. I was really excited to just have Chris as a collaborator. Over our hiatus, before the season started, I was doing a lot of reading. I chronicled the books that play into Liz every season on my Instagram. I was reading some Sonia Sotomayor. Her book is just incredible. I was texting him screenshots of pages of the book with things underlined. Ten episodes deep into season 3, he's like, "Remember that page you sent me?" He's a real dream collaborator. I loved him for that. A pressing struggle for people of color is going through the ranks in these big corporations and then sometimes coming to find out that those corporations are purporting to support marginalized groups but actually aren't following through. So how do you, as someone who's having your success, your dreams become reality, navigate supporting the company and giving so much of your intelligence and your work — that they often legally own, especially with science — to a company that isn't going to be for your people?

Roswell, New Mexico returns Monday at 8 p.m. on The CW.

[loversandantiheroes]

Can. Can we talk about how dexterous and clever Whiskey’s hands are. Can we talk about how strong and nimble and skilled they are. Can we.

(Hands anon) And honestly I’m a Frankie and Mando girl as well, you KNOW they hands are just as good 👌🙌

I want you to know I have tried to come back to this ask I don’t know HOW many times, but I always get incredibly distracted and just kind of stare into space with my eyes glazed over for like forty-five minutes.  Can’t imagine why...

1.8k words of pure hand-related yearning featuring Din, Frankie, Whiskey, and a bonus Ezra bc I was compelled.

Din’s hands are exactly what you’d expect in some ways - broad and strong as vise-grips, but meticulously deft when it comes to things that require care, whether that’s stripping down his weapons to clean them or patching your wounds (a surprise in and of itself given the impatient, almost flippant way he tends to the holes in his own hide).  What is surprising is just how soft his hands are under those ever-present gloves.  If you ever bring it up he’ll only huff a laugh, insisting his hands are as much a part of his toolkit as his weapons and his armor, and he wouldn’t be much of a Mandalorian if he didn’t take care of his tools.  Unpainted beskar needs to be cleaned and polished frequently, his guns need to be maintained, and the leather of his gloves need oiling to stay supple.  And his hands, too, need maintaining.  And well, hide is hide, and the oil he uses on his leathers goes a long way towards making sure his hands don’t crack or chap.

He’s a man of opposites, especially once you start to get past his defenses.  He can be absolutely unyielding and also shockingly gentle.  With the armor on he can be almost brazen about the way he touches you, particularly if what’s between you is purely physical.  Just scratching an itch?  Oh, he can do that, that’s easy.  And those hands can lock you down better than any binders.  But if it becomes more than that, if he starts pulling you close when he’s just down to his flight suit and there’s no cold press of metal between you, and finally works up the courage to pull those soft-worn gloves off?  It’s hard to imagine this is the same man.  He’s hesitant.  Nearly timid, you think at first, until you realize his hands aren’t trembling just from nerves but from the effort of control.  Touch is a luxury Din has never been afforded, something new to learn in the dark of his bunk with you pressed up against him with your back to his chest, overwhelmed by the simple contact of his fingers curling hesitantly around your own.  Give him time to breathe, to process, to touch without fear that it will overload him or that he might by some pure accident of excitement touch too hard and hurt when he doesn’t mean to (it is, he still thinks on his more rueful days, what he is built for; not this tenderness).  Your patience will absolutely be rewarded.

Frankie’s a bit of a different story, bless his heart.  His nails are starting to look a little less ragged these days - the nicotine gum has gone a long way towards both helping him back off the cigarettes and keep him from chewing them ragged when his anxiety’s off the rails - but given when he’s grounded he tends to go for more hands-on jobs, his hands can take a horrible beating.  If he’s not seeing anyone he doesn’t bother much trying to take care of them beyond pumice soap and the occasional application of vaseline or bag balm in the winter time when they get chapped.  But if that should change, suddenly he’s blisteringly self-conscious about his hands.  The spots where the skin is rough and peeling, the calluses that he’ll never be able to file down and the ones he is only just beginning to see fade (index finger, between the first and middle digits - his thumb still worries over it absently, as if trying to rub it out).  He buys a nail brush, starts using balm every night, trying to work the coarseness out of his hands before he ever dares to touch you with them. 

And god he wants to touch you.  Touch is a grounding thing for him, a much-needed anchor to keep him in the here and now.  If he’s near enough you’re almost certain to find his hands on you - snaking his fingers between yours, or resting his hand light and warm against your thigh when you come along for a drink with the boys, or pressing his palm flat and solid against your back to keep you steady when he walks you to the car after.  And that’s maybe the thing that clings to your bones the strongest: how safe those hands make you feel.  He’ll learn your body until he knows every dip and curve, knows the paths to skate his fingertips along, where to press in deep, where to only graze until he’s got every nerve singing.  But it’s that sense of safety that overwhelms you, that feeling when his hands cup your face or settle gently on your hips or close warmly around your own that there isn’t a force in the world that could hurt you as long as he’s there. 

Tell him so.  Fold his hands up in your own, brush your lips over his knuckles, and tell him that you know you’re in good hands - in the best hands.  It’ll nearly crack his heart in half to hear it.  He knows what those hands have done, no matter how hard he’s tried to wash them clean of it.  But if they can make you feel safe, then maybe they’re worth something after all.

Whiskey is too vain not to take care of his hands, let’s be honest. Though there is a bit of practicality to his vanity - there always is, somehow, like the grain of sand that spawns a pearl.  He learned early enough that if he was fool enough not to take care of his hands it played hell with his ability to use them properly, and much like Din, he fully recognizes that his hands are as much a necessary tool as anything Statesman could provide him.  Decades of experience with his lasso, whip, and guns have left the palms of his hands thickly callused (his right only slightly more so than his left), but careful attention has assured they’re never outright rough.  The way he uses those hands, though, that’s a different story.  They’re strong and shockingly clever, and just as greedy as the rest of him.  Whiskey has a permanent case of Roman hands and Russian fingers, all too likely to have his hand dangerously high up your thigh in public (and far higher still if you’ll let him), but always just out of the view of the people around you.  He’s a menace, through and through, but rest assured, he won’t be putting his hands on you unless he’s sure you want that (and if you do, he will absolutely make every second count - he is as greedy for your pleasure as he is his own).

If he’s managed to get himself in a state where there’s more than just his libido involved, well, it’d be disingenuous to suggest that tactile greed ever goes away, there isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell of that, but it does change.  He still wants to touch you (there isn’t a second in the day this man does not want to be touching you, somehow in some way), but it’s different.  It’s smaller touches among the big ones, almost innocuous.  Fixing your necklace when it’s crooked.  An idle stroke of his thumb along your wrist, or a brush of his fingers along your forehead to sweep the hair out of your eyes.  Helping you in or out of your coat, or taking a knee to do up the laces of your winter boots, or nuzzling ever so briefly into the back of your neck while his clever fingers cinch up a knot into the new apron you bought while you were on a baking kick.  The man’s got twenty years of latent domesticity stored up and he can’t quite help it if you bring it out in him.

When you meet Ezra, he’s down to just the one hand, though you don’t quite notice at first.  You're making your introductions - new dig crew, small, but seemingly well-seasoned, even counting the young girl that keeps a nervous orbit around Ezra - not quite clocking the way his right arm moves just a little different under the thick fabric of his suit until you close your hand around his and feel the hardness of metal under his glove.  If anyone is bold enough to ask how he lost the arm, he’ll just give a grin and insist it is not lost: he remembers exactly where he left it.  His remaining hand is striking somehow when you first see it without the thick gloves on.  Wide palm, thick fingers, a prominent thumb joint.  A small black target tattooed there in the webbing between his thumb and forefinger.  But his right hand, his new hand, he never takes the glove off of that one.  It’s accident the first time you see the thing in full, poking your head in his tent to let him know breakfast is running a little late on account of a brief problem with the water pump.  You find him sitting on his bunk in a battered thermal shirt with one sleeve cut off, his suit shoved down to his waist as he wrestles the prosthetic into place as Cee adjusts the harness over his shoulders.  It’s by no means top of the line, but it’s no cheap thing, that much you can tell.  The fingers, you know by now are fully articulated, and you can see now the digits and palm are thickly padded with silicone grips.  Ezra’s face hardens at the intrusion, Cee freezing behind him like a startled deer.  But then he sees it’s only you and the tension drains, his face softening, and he assures you they’ll both be out in a tick, just as soon as he’s made himself presentable.

It’s weeks later that you realize he’s only ever touched you with his right hand once.  Just the handshake that first day.  It’s tough to notice, honestly.  He’s not one to crowd into your space if you don’t want it, unless of course he’s trying to make a point.  You remember the floater that had wandered into your camp trying to make trouble, and the way Ezra had put a seemingly amiable hand on the man’s shoulder as he talked, smiling big and broad, and it wasn’t until the man cried out, dropping to his knees and clutching uselessly at his shoulder that you realized the full strength he carries in that prosthetic.  But every time Ezra is close enough to you to touch, it’s his left that finds you.  He makes a point of it, even going so far as to stay to your right when you walk together, but you don’t fully notice until one day he turns to you with an awkward twist to take hold of your arm with his left rather than his right.

It’s later, much later, in the dim quiet of your own tent, when the small touches finally snowball into something larger and more urgent and finally you feel that hand on you, bare and broad and warm as he cups the back of your neck to draw you close, and he almost laughs into your mouth when you suddenly ask him why he does that.

“Dear heart, if I am to touch you, I mean to feel it.”

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[yusei-clownington]

SO I FINALLY FINISHED 5D’S! And what better way to celebrate than to go through my favorite characters as…briefly as I can

Slight spoilers I suppose?

Let’s work it up from 10 to 1

10- Jack

Was gonna go with lucchiano but who am I kidding Jack’s great. He’s a drama queen with an even more dramatic wardrobe. Never afraid to express himself and just bluntly blurt out what he thought.

His obsession with Cup ramen is on another level but what can I say? Love is love, Jack x cup ramen for life *wipes tears*

But seriously speaking he’s great. His very first line was enough proof of that. He just… apologized for being late then declared “I AM KING” like the…king he is.

My favorite Rival character still remains Manjoume… and… Yeah I still prefer Kaiba over Jack but damn was he a good rival.

Like he has to be the only Rival so far with an actual past with the Main character, no? That was pretty interesting because usually, the protagonist meets the rival somewhere during the first season and we go off from there. But here we had to go through their backstory to know what their relationship was fully like. Nice touch.

9- Aki

Hands down my favorite female protagonist so far. I adore Anzu and feel neutral enough about Asuka but Aki? NAH MAN AKI’S AMAZING. I think 5D’s just does the best job with its female characters. Like it actually gives them big enough roles. I loved how Aki got her own episodes…be it the D-wheel ones or just… fillers.

Her crush on Yusei was justified, at least it seems so to me, and honestly never got obnoxious. Sure she had a moment here and there but it was honestly never a bad thing. Hell faith shipping in general isn’t exactly a bad Idea.

Speaking of shipping, is anyone going to talk about her little frienshipmaybemore moments with Crow? No? Ok…

But anyway, overall, SHE’S AMAZING AND I LOVE HER. There was more to her than some boring pining love interest and it shows with each episode. So when people say she has a great personality, they’re actually talking about her personality. AKI RULES

8- Mikage

Would’ve been way WAY higher on the list if the thing with Jack was thrown out the widow.

That being said I think she’s the more mature of the Jack-crazy trio. Like sure she was just as into him as the other two, but in some scenes she was a lot more tolerable.

But that honestly might just be my bias towards this amazing woman speaking.

She’s devoted to her work, gentle, caring, gorgeous and just all around a wonderful character to see.

I loved most of her scenes in the series, and the fact that there was more to her than just the jack part. She actually had an important part to play in many episodes and honestly proved herself to be a very fun character. I just wish they gave a her little more screentime than what she got.

A lot of lost potential there- I mean come on.

7- Rua /Lua

He reminds me of Judai WAY too much. LIKE WAAAAY too much not to be on this list. The guy’s adorable. And I love how they made him the emotional one. Like they could’ve gone with the “the boy is always rowdy and tOUGH” stereotype, but they didn’t. Sure, ruka (who I don’t like as much) was much more gentle, but it was much easier to see Rua cry than it was to see her do so. It’s just fun is all.

I also adore his deck and that little theme that played whenever he dueled… Plus his relationship with Jack and Yusei…GOLD GOLD.

6- Ushio

I made a whole post about Him, You think he wouldn’t be in my Top 10? Well think again. Great development would see through again.

5- Sherry Leblanc

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SHERRY.

What you just witnessed in the line above is my internal reaction to literally any scene this beautiful badass woman happens to be in.

She’s just amazing. She has this really… tough energy IDK HOW TO DESCRIBE IT BUT SHE’S A REALLY INTIMIDATING WOMAN. But not in a bad way, oh nonononono in a REALLY REALLY GOOD WAY OKAY.

Her character arcs and episodes somehow felt…really separate from the whole team 5D’s shenanigans even though they were basically connected…

Like she had her own motivation that didn’t particularly rely on bonds, but was still willing to accept and even form a bond with the whole team.

Revenge is kinda hot ngl.

Okay no it’s not. But seeing a vengeful character that WASN’T played off as evil or particularly wrong amidst a bunch of friendship is magic ones was pretty refreshing.

The moment she took her helmet off when dueling yusei I was HOOKED and so was Aki but shhhhhh.

But damn I love what they did with her at the end, Rushed as it may have been. It took her joining with Z-one briefly and dueling Aki and Crow ( a very underrated duo btw) to realize that maybe thinking of the past and only the past was not a very good idea.

Anyway love her. And her duels are always a delight to watch.

4- Placido

Before he showed up, sherry was supposed to be 4th but here we are. Placido Placido Placido. I want to make it clear that…I really couldn’t care less about Aporia as a whole. But Placido and Lucchiano were pretty fun characters.

Now I finally get to talk about my beloved.

This dude was…the biggest mood. EVER.

He would hang up in that third one’s face like it was nothing and constantly ignore his boring ass. Oh. You have a plan? Ok. I don’t care. It’s boring. I’m placido and I’ll do what I want. Kiss my D-wheel ass.

He has a lot of hilariously sassy lines, which include and I quote:

“I don’t know what god wants you to do.”

“But I won’t accept it!”

The guy just does not care and I’m living for it.

Not to mention his bee analogies which- Why have I not seen anyone point out????? BEE ANALOGIES COME ONNNNNNNN

aNYWAY PLACIDO’S GREAT

3- Kiryuu

Edgy dude with pretty hair. Also gay. Also the crash town arc. Need I say more?

I will anyway.

Honestly dark signer Kiryuu was pretty fun to me with all the crazy laughter and stuff…

Then past/ flashbacks Kiryuu was just as interesting but in a completely different way. Sure he didn’t get as many episodes or screentime as the rest, but what I saw of him was more than enough for me to care about the Character. Like unlike the old satellite gang (Rally and the other two whose names I can’t even remember) I actually gave a shit about this guy when bad stuff happened to him.

Not to mention his growth. Like…He went through reverse/ negative development, then uphill by the end of the signers’ ark with all the…dying in your hands gayly stuff, then downhill again by the beginning of the crosstown arc….aaaaand back up and higher than ever by the end of it. Basically the fact that his development wasn’t always constant just added some spice.

Plus his dynamic with his ex-teammates…team….satisfaction (Try saying that with a straight face) was always pretty entertaining, especially his with Yusei.

Speaking of which...

2- Yusei

With all my talk about him…and…my profile picture…and URL, it may come as a surprise that he’s not number 1 here, but honestly it’s so close you could call it a tie.

As for why I love him….Have you- Have you seen my blog????? Do I even..need to say anything????

1- Crow

Now there’s a lot I have to say about Crow honestly hE’S JUST THAT COOL, but I’m saving it to talk about later still. All I’ll say for now is this:

Flashy guy with an amazing sense of style, an earring and an incredible amount of cockiness and charisma. What’s not to like?

[dirtydancingdean]

something about how dean so completely parallels buffy summers from btvs like they are two iterations of the same character. i mean, buffy the vampire slayer is an undeniably a big influence on supernatural, even if the show itself wouldn’t exactly advertise that fact. you have sam’s sacrifice in swan song paralleling buffy’s sacrifice in the gift, the borrowing of a lot of demons and (god help me) lore, the weird amount of buffy actors in the show (sometimes playing vampires, which is hysterical), the campiness and horror. hell, even cas’s moment of pure happiness seems like a nod to angel’s moment of pure happiness. (dean and cas did it better though). but the biggest similarity is the way dean parallels buffy. he’s obviously not meant to. he’s supposed to be a gun-slinging, wise-cracking ladies man, but that’s not what he becomes. honestly that’s not even what he comes across as in the beginning. buffy and dean are both meant to be heroes, but buffy is the main character of her show, while that’s supposed to be sam in dean’s. and buffy and sam do share their similarities, particularly in their desire for normality which backfires on them because of their equally weighed desire to help people. but dean is so much more like buffy in so many ways?? like buffy, dean always feels everything is his responsibility (like he says in 7.05, “There’s always something eating at me. That’s who I am. something happens, I feel responsible, all right?”). this is largely in part thanks to j*hn winchester, while buffy’s sense of responsibility comes from the fact that a whole group of old white men have told her she’s the one girl in all the world who can fight evil. both of them kind of know on some level that this is kind of fucked up and even try attempting to fight back against their imposed duties occasionally. dean says it in 2.20: “Your happiness for all those people's lives, no contest. Right? But why? Why is it my job to save these people? Why do I have to be some kind of hero?” which is buffy to a t! that's what buffy is all about! the loneliness and unfairness of having this burden on your shoulders! buffy says this in prophecy girl: “I don't care! I don't care. Giles, I'm sixteen years old. I don't wanna die.” but they both always, always go back to do their job. they both always sacrifice their own happiness for others. none of the writers would have intended to have dean make a speech that is entirely parallel to buffy summers’s prophecy girl speech, right down to both sarah michelle gellar and jackles’s tears. because ha ha, buffy is a girl hero, while dean is the embodiment of every male fantasy about what an action hero is.

the thing is, though, when you make dean every male fantasy in the world - attractive, good with women, tough, strong, likes rock music, hates chick flick moments, knows how to shoot a gun, looks good doing it, etc - you make him every male fantasy about women too. which is how we get those slow, full-body shots of dean that you normally only get with women, how we get dean being a caretaker, dean being a pacifier between sam and john, dean watching dirty dancing and liking taylor swift, dean always being the bait, dean’s interactions with villains being framed sexually, dean getting called pretty twice a season. we joke about dean being a hot action girl but he is often objectified in the particular way only women in media are. the way buffy is - in the show i think they actually did a pretty good job of not objectifying buffy. but there are times where they do, and it’s uncomfortable, and it’s subtle, the way it is on spn. and buffy and dean are both used to this kind of treatment; they often weaponize their sexuality, using it when they feel threatened. in the first episode of s2, buffy’s just suffered the enormous trauma of being resurrected after having been bitten by a vampire whose violence has sexual undertones. when she comes back to her friends, they talk about how closed off and mean she’s being, culminating in the scene where she goes to the bronze. if you haven't seen that scene then i dont know how to explain the way she absolutely uses her sexuality against xander and angel, just like dean uses his as a front to protect himself against everyone. when buffy’s traumatized she pushes herself away from those closest to her, represses her emotions, and uses fighting demons as a distraction. sound familiar? buffy and dean both make witty pop culture references that monsters don’t understand and self-deprecating jokes about themselves to deal with when they feel threatened and their low opinions of themselves. buffy has a lot of lines that sound just like dean’s! @lazarusr1sing mentioned buffy saying, “I may be dead, but I’m still pretty, which is more than I can say for you,” as a line that dean literally could have said and it’s true! they’re both a fan of quirky banter during fights but they’re both so messed up when it comes to their opinions of themselves. buffy in 7x07: “I have all this power. I didn't ask for it. I don't deserve it. It's like... I wanted to be punished. I wanted to hurt like I thought I deserved. [...] I feel like I'm worse than anyone. Honestly, I'm beneath them. My friends, my boyfriends. I feel like I'm not worthy of their love. 'Cause even though they love me, it doesn't mean anything cause their opinions don't matter. They don't know. They haven't been through what I've been through. [...] Sometimes I feel...this is awful. I feel like I'm better than them. Superior.” yeah, that’s...dean.

and they absolutely dive into self guilt and hatred if something goes wrong, even if it’s not necessarily their fault. faith in 3x15 says to buffy, “In the balance, nobody's gonna cry over some random bystander who got caught in the crossfire,” and buffy says, “I am.” the amount of trauma buffy and dean both go through kind of desensitizes them to this idea - dean especially, i think, though that’s mainly the fault of the sheer amount of writers and episodes supernatural has - but if they get someone killed, they will do absolutely anything to make up for it.

the idea of sympathetic monsters in buffy and supernatural is met with scorn a lot of the time by buffy and dean. for buffy this is a matter of mental self-preservation. her job is to kill demons, and if she lets herself think all demons can be good, then that means she might have been killing sentient beings that could have done good or weren’t doing harm, since she was a teenager. she can’t let herself think that way so she closes herself off to the possibility of demons being good a lot of the time. we talk about how supernatural majorly drops the ball when it comes to empathizing with the monsters (where’s that post, you know, the, “saving people, hunting things, white men with guns decide which is which,” post), but when it comes to dean, part of that is because, like buffy, he doesn’t want to face the idea that he’s been killing things that aren’t evil since he was a child. he’ll make exceptions (cas, crowley, benny, rowena), like buffy makes exceptions (angel, spike, clem, oz, anya), but it’s easier if it’s all black and white. they’re both strangely attracted to monsters too, though, because part of them feels like they are monsters themselves. like @s4castiel said they have romantic or romantically implied relationships with things they’re meant to fight - dean with benny, cas, and crowley + buffy with angel, spike, and faith. and monsters change themselves for buffy and dean’s sakes – cas, benny, crowley, angel, spike, all become better for the sake of buffy and dean! like that leviathan in 7.06 who says dean doesn’t have relationships he has applications for sainthood!

they hate the idea of being seen as just a killer (dean in 3.10, “Daddy knew what you were. Good soldier and nothing else,” and buffy in 5.22, “Guess that means a Slayer really is just a killer after all.”) dean says, “[A killer] is not who I am,” to chuck in 15.19, just like buffy says, “A slayer is not a killer,” through the later seasons. spike’s speech in 5.07 i think, really says it: “Death is on your heels, baby, and sooner or later, it's gonna catch you. And part of you wants it, not only to stop the fear and uncertainty, but because you're just a little bit in love with it. Death is your art. You make it with your hands day after day, that final gasp, that look of peace.” their worst fear is that all they can do is hurt other people. they’ve been brought up to think violence is all they can do. but they both are first and foremost protectors, especially when it comes to sam and dawn, whose roles in both shows respectively is to be a reminder of dean and buffy’s humanity.

dawn, who first shows up in season 5 as buffy’s younger sister, is, represents buffy’s most beloved parts of herself, buffy’s humanity. sam is a lot like her in the respect that their destiny was to end the world; they’re both book-smart too, while buffy and dean act a lot like dumb blondes despite being incredibly intelligent in ways that aren’t clear to everyone. (not to go on a tangent but they’re both really good battle tacticians who make a lot of references to literature and tv shows and can perceive people and monsters’ weaknesses, etc.) dawn is dangerous to the world like sam is dangerous to the world in s2-s5, but buffy will not kill her like dean will not kill sam. you know how in the end 2009 dean realizes just how much 2014 dean has changed when he talks about killing sam as lucifer? sam is dean’s humanity like dawn is buffy’s humanity. they both put their siblings over everything else in the world. they sacrifice things that sam and dawn can’t begin to understand because dean and buffy shield them from it - dean in 2.22: “I had to take care of you. It’s my job,” and buffy in 6.14: “Dawn, the most important job that I have is looking out for you.” in s5 of buffy, if dawn lives, the world ends, and buffy doesn’t care because she can’t kill dawn. in 5.22 she says, “I don't understand. I don't know how to live in this world if these are the choices. If everything just gets stripped away. I don't see the point. I just wish that...I just wish my mom was here. [..] If Dawn dies, I’m done with it. I’m quitting,” paralleling dean quitting hunting after sam dies. they’re both insanely protective over dawn and sam - dean in 2.09: “You make a move on [Sam], you'll be dead before you hit the ground,” and buffy in 5.22: “I’ll kill anyone who comes near Dawn.” when sam dies in 2.22, dean doesn’t hesitate to offer up his soul in exchange for sam’s life; when dawn is about to die to save the world in 5.22, buffy doesn’t hesitate to die to save the world in dawn’s place. this all on top of the fact that sam and dawn are the babies, the ones dean and buffy have to take care of, which means that...no one is taking care of dean and buffy. like, dean in 3.10: “Sam, [John] doted on. Sam he loved,” and buffy’s mom in 5.05 hugging dawn and calling her “little punkin belly” and in response to buffy’s question of, “Did you ever have any names for me?” says, “No, I think you were always just Buffy.” when buffy’s mom gets sick in s5, buffy has to shoulder an incredible amount of responsibility - giving her mom her medicine, taking care of her, taking care of dawn, fighting a hellgod - and can’t break down in front of anyone because she has to be strong for dawn and her mom, the way dean has to be strong for sam and john (john in 2.01: “You took care of Sammy, you took care of me. You did that, and you didn't complain, not once.) they’re both so scared of opening up and being a burden - buffy’s nightmare hallucination of her deadbeat dad in 1.10 says the same kind of stuff about her being a burden and unwanted that zachariah’s projection of mary says in 5.16. it really is about the eldest sister complex in the end!!!

but they didn’t ever really mean to have dean be like buffy! buffy was literally meant to subvert traditional male action heroes. buffy summers is the male action hero, but she gets to have feelings and traditionally feminine traits too. she likes cheese and wearing pink and dressing up and having pretty hair, but she thinks about battle tactics and kills a vampire like every episode. dean? dean is meant to be the male action hero without the part about having feelings and traditionally feminine traits...except that backfires spectacularly. i mean, they give dean traits such as liking nightgowns to be like haha, wink-wink, nudge-nudge, isn’t that HILARIOUS. except it doesn’t come off that way, we know it doesn’t come off that way. so dean’s watched dead poets society and rent and he sings along to air supply and is good with kids and nerds out over cowboys, but he drives a classic muscle car and kills death and carries a gun with him everywhere he goes. dean and buffy both become multifaceted, complicated, human heroes – but it was intentional for buffy. it was unintentional for dean, so the narrative actively punishes him for it. i mean ymmv on how you feel about the ending of buffy, but she does get a satisfying happy ending. dean, on the other hand, is silenced and killed off and gets the worst possible ending for his character, all because they couldn’t control him.

[kareofbears]

long lines and cold nights

“Sakamoto-san!” the voice of a gruff middle-aged man a few spots behind Akira yells out. Akira’s smile splits even wider, knowing what will happen next. “Is that the Akira you keep telling us about?”

———

Akira visits Ryuji at work and witnesses how he interacts with his customers.

read on ao3 or below the cut :)

Akira didn’t think that bread would be so popular during Christmas.

It’s evening, and every store in Tokyo seemed to be flashing with multicolored fairy lights. The roads have long since turned the snow to slush, but the sidewalk still had white flurries piled high on top of each other. No matter where anyone looks, there are shoppers lugging around gift bags and wearing thick mittens, all eager to hide away from the freezing temperatures and numbing fingers. Despite the hustle, there’s a collective attitude from everyone present that exudes a certain liveliness that’s only ever present during the holiday season.

He’s next in line to get into the bakery, a thick, bright-red scarf wrapped tight around his neck and hands clutching a heavy paper bag. The scent of baked goods wafts from where he’s standing, and it makes him salivate just a little. Akira’s been standing here for half an hour now, the line moving at a horrifically sluggish pace that would get employees crucified during the holiday shopping rush. Yet, for some reason, the line doesn’t ever seem to get impatient.

The bakery exudes warm lighting through its glass windows, and Akira glances inside. It hasn’t changed much since he came in here last, but now it’s slathered with pine-colored wreaths and garlands, all twisted with bright-red ribbons and over-the-top bows that would have been ridiculous had he not known who put them up in the first place. Now, it’s just endearing.

An old woman hobbles to the glass door from the inside, hands full with bags of brioche, and just as Akira is about to open the door for her, it swings open—

“Oh! So kind of you, Sakamoto-kun!”

“Don’t worry about it, ma’am. I’m sure neither of us can take the heartbreak if that bread of yours hits the concrete, huh?”

They both share a genuine laugh, and Ryuji holds the door open as the woman shuffles away, still smiling. Instrumental Christmas music is playing from inside, and with it comes a burst of heat that’s packaged with every bakery during the wintertime.

Akira presses his lips together. “Does that mean I can come in now?”

Ryuji blinks, before his head jerks towards him, eyes wide. “Akira!”

This is probably his second favorite part of visiting Ryuji when he works; with a white button-up and khakis topped off with a red apron, he looks incredibly endearing in a way that Akira can’t begin to describe. It’s only ever improved during December, when he chooses to wear reindeer antlers for a more festive look. (His words. Apparently, the regulars love it.)

“Ryuji.” He can’t hold it back anymore—a smile splits wide across his face. “Looking good.”

“Looking hot you mean,” he gives Akira a slow spin. “Bet you’ve never seen anyone rock an apron this hard.”

He meant it as a joke, but it still rings true. Both of them are older now. A little taller, a little broader than they were in high school, but there’s something in the way that Ryuji’s changed that makes people flock to him. His hair is still bleached blond (there’s no getting rid of that one), but he has an undercut that shows his natural hair underneath, and he has bright red studs on both earlobes that have the tendency to catch light when he’s at the right angle.

When he smiles, it’s bigger than it was. When he laughs, it fills in every empty crevice in the room. When he speaks, it’s with a little more confidence.

But despite everything that had changed, when his eyes meet Akira’s, it’s still the loveliest feeling in the world.

“Nope,” he answers honestly, despite seeing him in that apron dozens of times before. “And I’ll never get tired of it.”

“Sakamoto-san!” the voice of a gruff middle-aged man a few spots behind Akira yells out. Akira’s smile splits even wider, knowing what will happen next. “Is that the Akira you keep telling us about?”

��Wait, the Kurusu Akira?” Someone else pipes in—a girl in her early twenties. “Huh, you’re right! He’s just as good-looking as you said he was.”

“Thank you for your kind words,” Akira replies, but his eyes are trained on the boy in front of him, refusing to look embarrassed. “That’s really nice of you to say.”

“Aw, and he seems like such a sweetheart, too. How’s the cafe doing? Heard you got promoted to assistant manager there recently. Good on you!”

He gives Ryuji an amused look. “Is there anything you haven’t told them about me?”

“When have I ever learned to shut up when it came to you?” he shrugs. “Pretty sure even the bookstore next door knows about your promotion too, by now.”

“Kurusu-kun, congrats on finishing your essay! Foreign policy is a tough thing to write on, you know.”

“Oh Kurusu-san, you’re absolutely going to adore what Sakamoto-chan got you for Christmas! He worked so hard on it, you’re going to love it to shreds.”

“Hold on, I thought you worked Thursday nights, Kurusu-kun. What are you doing here?”

It seems that even Ryuji has a breaking point—his face has grown scarlet, and his eyes are flittering away. It’s mind-numbingly charming. When Akira responds, his small smile has worked up to become a full-on grin. “I just got off work, actually.”

“Guys,” Ryuji groans loudly and leans over to give the long line a stern look. “We can’t keep doing this every time Akira comes over, it’s getting embarrassing.” Laughter rumbles through the lineup, warm and familiar and not a hint of maliciousness to be heard.

He clears his throat, but his soft voice does little to carry over the bustle of the city’s shoppers during their prime. “Sorry, I just wanted to drop something off for him. I didn’t mean to hold up the line or anything—”

“Dear,” an aging woman cuts him off. “Trust me when I say that we love seeing Sakamoto-san here be happy. After everything he’s done for us, this must be the least that we can do.”

“Yeah! He’s always giving us scones when there’s too many—”

“—and croissants—!”

“—once, he gave me a danish for free—”

Ryuji shushes them, panicked. “Quit yelling it out like that, or I might get fired.”

“As if we’d let that happen to you!” someone snorts, and there’s a chorus of agreements that ripple from the crowd.

Belatedly, Akira realizes that his cheeks are starting to hurt, but this wouldn’t be the first time this happened. Or the second. Or the tenth.

This is his favorite part about visiting him at work—to see him at work, to see him play the role of working in customer service.

But it never feels like that. When Ryuji’s speaking to customers, it doesn’t matter what they’re buying or how busy they are; he gets to know them. He could give less of a damn about the product they sell; it’s less about the selling, and more about reaching out to them and to make sure that they’re doing alright. He takes the time to talk to them, to learn their names and their preferences and who they are.

It just so happens that they also get to know him in return.

“I should go,” Akira mummers. “You’ll never get through this line if I keep distracting you like this.”

He rolls his eyes. “Sure, blame me and not the actual gang of people bullying a poor bakery sales associate.”

“They love you, Sakamoto-san,” he teases.

“Oh, shut up.”

“I just wanted to drop by to say hi, and also—” Akira holds up the still-warm bag in his hand. “To drop off some ramen, in case you got sick of eating bread during your break.”

Ryuji’s eyes are sparkling. Quickly glancing inside the bakery to make sure his manager isn’t watching, he pecks his cheek. He smells like sugar glaze and warmth.

“I love you,” he whispers, ignoring the small cheer behind them like some sort of romcom.

“And I love you. Go kick some ass, and I’ll pick you up at 8:30, okay?”

“Yes, sir,” Ryuji salutes, taking the weight off his hands, before turning to the person behind Akira. “Saito-san, welcome back! Two loaves of the Country Grain, right?”

Akira moves out of the way to finally let the line flow, touching Ryuji’s shoulder as he passes by. He takes one last look behind him and feels a pang of sympathy.

He’s been here enough times, has eaten enough of this bakery’s products to know that there really isn’t anything special about it. The food is fine; the scones are good, but he’s had better. Sometimes the flour loaf is tasty, but it’s hit or miss. The danishes are sweet and fluffy, but it’s guaranteed to be sold out by the time it hits noon.

It’s a mediocre bakery in the middle of Tokyo. You could find five more just like it down the street, and three better ones if you’re willing to take the bus. But, for some reason, there are also very few bakeries with this long of a line-up during the busiest time of the year.

Akira was the first person to line up for Sakamoto Ryuji’s attention all those years ago and it’s ridiculous that it’s taken this long for more people to start doing the same thing.

[roswellnmsource]

Jeanine Mason and Roswell, New Mexico showrunner preview season 3 of the extraterrestrial drama

ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: Was the year time jump because of the pandemic? To sidestep making that too central to the plot, or was that always the plan?

JEANINE MASON: That was always our intention and it was just sort of a saving grace in that way. We also don't acknowledge the pandemic in real-time on our show. There are no masks and that was just so wonderful just to get work in that way and have that time where it was a little more normal. Also, that's just our show — we want you to come to us the way you always do, which is for nineties nostalgia, sexy Cowboys, brilliant scientists, you know?

CHRIS HOLLIER: So we wanted to drop our characters in a year later, let them stew in their individual decisions that were made last season. We want everyone to root for our poster couple but we want to honor what happens in real life, which is sometimes you step away from that person, even if you are entwined with them in a very particular way. So we wanted it to be a real enough time and distance so that they could live a little life on their own.

With showrunner Carina Adly MacKenzie departing at the end of season 2, has much changed? Or are you still working with ideas she had in place?'

HOLLIER: It's a little bit of both. There are things that Carina and I built that live all the way through and then once the story got up on its feet, discoveries were made with our new crop of people that we were like, "Oh, we're going to bend it this other way."

Jeanine, how is Liz doing in her new life in L.A. when we pick up this season?

MASON: Well, it's been a year and at this point, her life is actually pretty great. She just hasn't taken a second to acknowledge that. She's doing what she does best, which is just full head in her work and trying to figure out what she could use of her discoveries and her brilliance to save Maria. She has a great job, a really nice place, and an awesome partner at work who is a good time and a real match for her in terms of intellect and ambition. He begins to ask her to recognize that and to maybe give something a chance that she's been reluctant to because of how drawn she is to Roswell and to Max. It's a fun first episode. It's sexy. It's fun to find opportunities for her. She's our hero so she's got a lot on her shoulders and anytime where we can find levity for her is always a real treat for the writers and for me.

And no Crashdown waitress uniform must be nice?

MASON: Honestly, I miss it quite a lot right now. I have a note in my notes with Chris, I'm like, "I gotta tell him we gotta find him more opportunities for it."

Should Liz and Max shippers be worried about them finding their way back to one another after he destroyed her work and didn't follow her to L.A.? Should we resign ourselves to a season apart?

MASON: This season really is about these characters having themselves mirrored to each other. Max and Liz need some growing and ultimately they can't do anything but be orbiting each other. We found so many opportunities to have such a beautiful language around the cosmic element of their connection. They're asking, "Is this our decision, or are we just acting off of a decision that the cosmos made for us?" It was so fun to navigate that. I always have such a good time with Chris Hollier and with Nathan Dean, just finding the little tiny notches, a tiny bit of movement towards where they're going next. I really loved following them. It's my favorite Max and Liz season to date.

HOLLIER: It's not a season apart. I'll tease that they, in an unexpected way, end up in front of each other relatively soon. But it's really about when am I ready? And what does it mean to talk to my ex? When someone makes such a big influence in your life, when do you know it's over and when do you know you should fight again? We tried to give them real grown-up lives.

Steven Krueger (The Originals) also joined the cast as Heath this season. What can you tease about his character?

HOLLIER: He's just an awesome human being. I know him from The Originals and we were like, "If we're going to have to be stuck with people in the desert, who do we want?" You want to be stuck with a handsome and lovely and charming Steven Krueger. So really this was looking at, "Well, what did Liz want and what does it look like when you start to give Liz versions of what she wants?" Heath is somebody that is beyond being just a lovely person, he is smart and wants to advance science and that's appealing to Liz. It becomes, "What does it look like when the man that I hang around with all day is also into the same things that I am?"

MASON: I love him. Heath is just such a fun, whip-smart, fantastic character. His humor was so fun. We've been having a good time with kicking the humor up really through season two and in season three, we just took it up another notch. There are some moments that are like, "Is this a drama or is it a sitcom?" Looking back on it, he was such a fun partner to spar with. They're both such intellectual characters and I love that there's a real meeting of the minds. It makes it competitive and sexy. I know a lot of fans are so excited because they know him from The Originals and he's going to be a great addition.

Technically, Mr. Jones is a new character too. Can you tell us anything at all about him?

HOLLIER: I'd say he's a new character — and a fully-fleshed interesting new character. Mr. Jones has an awesome beard. At some point, he might lose that beard. A lot of people are asking me, "Is Jones good or bad?" And what I would argue is that's a perspective based upon who you are in the conversation that you're having with him. He knows a lot about our heroes' story and he knows a lot about home. He'll be able to answer questions for them. This season our heroes will get to learn why they ended up here on earth. One of the things I think that people will love is that they're going to get to see that home planet this year. We asked ourselves a lot about this whole season, "What have we set up for the past two?" We look at these first three seasons almost like a trilogy so a lot of things are going to be paid off.

Has Nathan enjoyed pulling double duty this season? Or is he just exhausted?

MASON: He's exhausted, but he's such a champ. That really is the beginning of this mirroring thing that starts with Max and Jones with him actually getting to look at himself to a degree and those questions that come up. The self-analysis that it provokes in him is really the beginning of what is happening to all of our characters this year; everybody's being confronted with themselves. I loved that the Max/Jones of it was also a real sci-fi element.

Did he really grow that beard or was that not possible if he had to go between the two characters?

MASON: That was a prosthetic beard and our makeup team killed it. He was not accustomed to early mornings, which, of course, all of us babes are. It was a lot of extra time in the chair for him.

Can Jones dupe Liz into thinking he's actually Max since she doesn't know he exists?

MASON: You're totally on to something. It's a real and pressing threat. I mean, she's totally in the dark and he looks like her cosmic lover!

HOLLIER: What I will say is that, Liz — beyond her being number one on the call sheet — is integral to this story in a way that she and none of our characters are going to perceive when they start episode one. We're bringing [the characters] to a new crossroads moment in their lives and they're getting, through Jones, a mirror into their own lives to decide what they're going to become next.

How's Rosa (Amber Midthunder) doing this season?

MASON: By the end of season two, Rosa really makes the decision to start taking care of herself. She really becomes an incredible asset to the Scooby-Doo gang. It's something that Liz is in constant adjustment to. As much as she's the younger sister, she feels very protective of her sister and Liz has had to make adjustments in her trust and faith in Rosa. I loved it because it just felt like a real personal, authentic thing that sisters would go through, but also that Hispanic sisters would go through. I think we sometimes, culturally, have a tendency to baby our women — maybe that's the wrong word — but just to underestimate their physical ability and what they might take on, and sort of 'queen' our women in a way where we treat them tenderly. I hate that. I'm a tough bitch and so is Rosa. So Liz has to confront that and go, "I'm an idiot to underestimate you. You've done nothing but prove me wrong."

What about Maria and her visions?

HOLLIER: This year I think Maria has the most complete arc of any season, as she recognizes things about herself that cause more questions about who she is, who her family is, how she's linked to this story. We dive into it in the present-day and we dive deliciously back in time too.

In the exclusive clip above we see her have a vision of a funeral, can you tease anything about who potentially might be about to die?

HOLLIER: Maria is front and center in driving the first half of the mystery for us. She's burdened with trying to figure out whose death she is seeing. It takes a few episodes to unravel and we use it to ask, is this linked to our supernatural stories or real-world stories that are going on politically? Is it bad luck? Is it herself? There's a whole gambit at play. We joke that we solved a past murder, now we're going to try to stop one.

Can Malex (Michael and Alex) shippers have hope that this might finally be their time?

HOLLIER: What I would say is that I think that Malex fans are really going to dig this journey. We, as writers, put them at the same level of importance as Max and Liz. So we wanted to really honor the next step in what they may or may not be. How did they grow up and how did they have those hard conversations just like Liz and Max are going to have?

Is Isobel going to continue to date women this season?

HOLLIER: Isobel is going to go on a more personal journey. You got to love yourself before you can love someone else. We lean into those possibilities by the end of who she might love. It's not something that is dropped all season — it is something that you'll see. We play some romantic comedy stuff with her character this year and with Maria that I think fans are gonna dig. There's a lot going on in the world and wanted to pump some humor and hope into it.

Will see more of Liz fighting to challenge the perception of the Latinx community?

MASON: I think that just by nature of it being one of such few shows that are led by a Latin woman, it's always going to be, to an extent, a protest or an assertion of the space that I get to fill and that Liz Ortecho gets to fill on network TV. I was really excited to just have Chris as a collaborator. Over our hiatus, before the season started, I was doing a lot of reading. I chronicled the books that play into Liz every season on my Instagram. I was reading some Sonia Sotomayor. Her book is just incredible. I was texting him screenshots of pages of the book with things underlined. Ten episodes deep into season 3, he's like, "Remember that page you sent me?" He's a real dream collaborator. I loved him for that. A pressing struggle for people of color is going through the ranks in these big corporations and then sometimes coming to find out that those corporations are purporting to support marginalized groups but actually aren't following through. So how do you, as someone who's having your success, your dreams become reality, navigate supporting the company and giving so much of your intelligence and your work — that they often legally own, especially with science — to a company that isn't going to be for your people?

[kaypeace21]

Hey, i always wondered what your thoughts are on Jonathan's relationship with bob? Like at the beginning of season 2

 I think Jon doesn’t trust men who are romantically involved with joyce (specifically those trying to be a dad figure). Bob : “I feel like I’m breaking through with them.Well… not so much Jonathan he’s a tough cookie to crack.” Joyce shrugs her shoulders in agreement and agrees saying “yes”. The same season, outright explains why this is -when Murray says “Trust issues , am I right? something to do with your dad?”

The thing that needs to be mentioned is- Lonnie is incredibly 2 faced and manipulative. The s4 movies and s1 allude to the fact he can put on a fake-nice facade. We see in front of Jon he insults Joyce, but when he realizes he can profit off Will’s death he flirts with her (calls her ‘babe’ and pretends to care). Joyce later saying “I can’t believe I fell for this” (implying Lonnie has manipulated her in the past). And Lonnie then gas-lights jonathan and joyce when he’s called out on his manipulation. Lonnie saying she is a horrible parent and it’s her fault for what happened to Will. Then says joyce needs him (joyce in turn says she hasn’t needed him for a long time). Jon also says something similar when Lonnie says he’s here to make things better, but jon says ‘you’re just making everything worse- like you always do’.  Lonnie then implies that  Jon is going to make Joyce snap mentally, so he needs to stay. 

* In the red room, jon says he’d rather observe people than talk to them -”Yeah, I know it’s weird… it’s just sometimes people don’t always say what they’re really thinking.” (aka Lonnie who lies and constantly gaslights, and who Jonathan literally calls out for saying desingenous things).

So naturally he doesn’t trust Bob- despite being the polar opposite of  Lonnie (he doesn’t smoke/drink, never yells/belittles joyce & Will, is supportive of Joyce (and Will’s) mental issues,  into comics/av/computers, and not traditionally masculine or aggressive).  Jon has seen the ‘nice guy act’ before, and is paranoid it’s fake. He doesn’t trust him in the house at night- we saw how aggressive he was after learning Bob spent the night-unbeknownst to him. He was worried he may do something to Will in the middle of the night like Lonnie used to- why the next night he sneaks into Will’s  room to check up on him.

Every season Jon brings up his dad in one way or another- it’s pivotal to his arc and issues (post here). In s1 he deals with his dad’s manipulation, in tears /anger demands he leaves , and doesn’t even stay in the house over night when Lonnie stays there. It’s implied there was serious ab*se (some joyce probably wasn’t aware of) given the fact jon checked lonnie’s trunk for Will, Lonnie canonically called his young child hom*phobic slurs, and forced both of them to k*ll animals to be more masculine . Along with the fact , in s1 the byers house had several holes in the walls and when asked how they got there. Joyce dismisses it as just “having boys”. Sorry-I can’t see Jon and will wrestling/rough housing with eachother and causing holes in walls like some brothers might. Sounds like a lie from Lonnie , honestly. And Steve comparing Jonathan to his father causes him to uncharacteristically go into a blind rage. S3 he brings up his dad (and his financially responsibilities/stress he has to deal with- cause he’s not around). In s2, they mention Jon’s trust issues with Lonnie. And In the shed , Joyce and Mike tell their happiest memories involving Will. And Jonathan brings up the day their dad left-implying it’s a happy memory. The leaving wasn’t what caused the trust issues- it’s what he did before that.One s4 movie quote that hurt to watch was when a coworker says to a guy  “you don’t have friends!” him: “i have friends.” coworker : ‘no you have acquaintances . ADMIT IT! YOU’RE AFRAID OF MEN!”

That could easily be a scene in s4 or 5 (maybe argyle says it to him?) I think it wraps up why he still isolates himself even now. Jon doesn’t have friends- he was lying to Will. He doesn’t have them for various reasons but one of them is cause he doesn’t trust people easily and men probably make him very anxious. At work he doesn’t socialize with any of his male coworkers and stays in the red photo room alone just like he did at school in s1. Showing he hasn’t made much progress when it comes to his social issues.

[zocrzay]

I am coming clean and admitting I've had an unhealthy obsession these past few weeks analyzing the break up of Katie & Greg, my favorite ship from the entire Bachelor/ette franchise. I went down hard with this ship as it crashed and burned. From the beginning, I loved their chemistry and even if some say they were just trauma bonding over the passing of their fathers, I felt they had so much more going for them. I just figured out why I can't shake this pair out of my head.

Here it is: Katie & Greg remind me of Lizzie & Darcy from Pride & Prejudice, one of the greatest love stories ever told. The idea that a couple similar to a favorite fictional pairing could exist in real life had awakened the hopeless romantic in me.

Greg is totally Mr. Darcy. He is a family man, adorably awkward, reserved, internally tormented, but also deeply passionate. He's willing to dance to encourage affection.

Katie is like Lizzie. She is strong-willed, proud (maybe too proud), and has a sharp tongue. She gives no one permission to insult her. She loves her family even though they're embarrassing. Katie does not quite fit in with other women, but that is why she is so interesting.

The opposite personalities of Lizzie & Darcy made their playful banter and relationship dynamic so enjoyable. They challenged each others' ideas. They expanded each others' consciousness as they learned more about each other. This was synergy at its finest.

Katie is from hipster Seattle while Greg is from fuss-free Jersey - two very different worlds at opposite ends of America. They brought these worlds together in beautiful balance. When they split, the Bachelor Nation fandom was divided like a broken family. At least Greg owned up the error of his ways, but Katie seems dead set on hating him. Eventually, the false narratives she tells herself to keep her walls up will unravel . I hope she faces the facts and owns up to her part in the communication breakdown. When Greg was most vulnerable, Katie could not show a hint of honest affection. She accused him of giving up on the relationship moments after he confessed his love for her. Katie only spoke of herself as a prize to be won, but to Greg, she meant so much more than just that. I hope she realizes the profound truth in what Greg was trying to tell her the day he left her. True love is more than just keeping up appearances for a show and more than just physical attraction. It is more than just saying the words "I love you" or handing out roses. Katie and Greg were more than just two hot people who were mutually attracted to each other. They had divine harmony when they were together... until they were burned by the heat of their own fire.

It is nice to know Greg just wants Katie to be happy, but I do not believe Katie & Blake have the secret sauce. Good for them for having a lot of sex, but from what I know, that kind of connection is not long term sustainable. If banging each other is the main reason they're together, they'll eventually get bored. Blake fell in love so easily with two previous Bachelorettes and that cheapens his affection for Katie. I'm sure he can bounce back quickly if Katie left him. Sorry man. Blake seems like a great person, but his intellect does not seem to match hers ("You don't have to be great. You just have to be you." dafuq?). I thought she was smarter, but maybe her flippant use of the term 'gaslighting' proves otherwise. It is shamefully elitist to point that out, but honestly, their conversation was drab when they weren't talking about sex. There are a lot of hot horny ladies out there that Blake might have more chemistry with than her. He was not even sure he wanted to propose and it was mean to tease her in the proposal speech with "I don't think I can give you what you came here for". The Say Anything references were also cringeworthy. We did not see their love get tested. She was like a damsel in distress and Blake just swooped in to save her season of the show just because he happened to be there. It was quite dull. The 'conclusion' of their journey was really unsatisfying. Katie describing their love story as "perfect" just shows the lack of depth in their relationship.

Lizzie & Darcy were such beloved characters because they were both flawed. They both made mistakes, but because of their love, they were willing to overcome their pride and their prejudice. They corrected course and became the best versions of themselves at the end of the story before choosing to be together. "I was wrong" are three words that make the words "I love you" so much more meaningful. True love is transformational. Feelings of attachment are not true love unless there is consciousness. The best love stories are not about lovers conquering outside forces, but conquering their own inner demons. People truly in love consciously choose to grow together in spirit, not in spite of their imperfections, but because of them.

Greg was impatient and had unrealistic expectations. He should have given Katie more chances to figure out what he was saying. Maybe she found his desperation unattractive. Maybe if he helped her off the floor and said goodbye properly, she might have flown out to Jersey to go after him. Katie was shallow when she could only say "I just love looking at you" and spoke to Greg as if he were just a contestant on a game show. It seemed as if his pain was just an inconvenience to her. She seemed untrustworthy. If she had stronger feelings for Blake or was still undecided, openly expressing that to Greg would have been more respectable than stringing him along to dump him later. If Greg was the one she wanted the most, she looked incredibly fickle switching her affection to whoever was still available. Most people have not been in her situation, so it is tough to judge.

Lizzie Bennet said a lot of mean things, but she was a strong female character because she was able to learn from her mistakes and grow as a person without compromising her core values. She was in love with Darcy for his character and integrity. He was courageous, generous, and compassionate - his appearance, his wealth and his status were least important to her. He proved his love for Lizzie by his selfless acts of kindness to her family even after she accused him of being a pompous ass.

Greg staying out of the way to honor Katie's decision and let her be happy with Blake is an act of love. Him working on himself in therapy is another way to prove the love he had for her was real. Only Katie knows the inner conflict she's been facing. If she truly loved Blake, resolving her conflict with Greg will help her and Blake in the long run - otherwise their relationship will be haunted by the past. If life with Greg was always her true heart's desire, love will find a way even in the most impossible circumstances.

It really is not fair to compare real human beings to fictional characters - especially the exceptionally (maybe unrealistically) strong characters written by Jane Austen. I am just sharing my thoughts before I watch the 2005 Pride and Prejudice movie for the hundredth time. I just want the satisfying ending I could not get from watching reality TV before I move on to my next obsession.

[callioope]

Continuing my reactions to Avatar: The Last Airbender. 

This post is about Book 2. See my overall impressions and thoughts on Book 1 here.

Quick/General Thoughts

Uhhh pretty wild there is both a solar eclipse and a super comet happening in the same summer… anyways!!!

Ba Sing Se was so messed up omg

Aang

SMH more adults trying to take advantage of Aang. I was furious with the Earth Kingdom general who tried to force Aang to fight the Fire Lord well before he was ready. Clearly he was not ready! And then the audacity for him to attack Aang and then Katara to provoke the Avatar state was whole levels of messed up. 

The Great Appa Kidnapping: Yeah, so, as soon as the sand traders took him, I was like, “Oh no. I’ve heard about this. They are going to be in trouble!” But even then I didn’t know it stretched out over so many episodes. These episodes broke my heart! Aang’s complete distress at having lost Appa. Then the episode from Appa’s POV. Poor Appa! He goes through so much. It’s devastating. And then both Appa and Aang both dream of how they originally met each other? UNFAIR. CRUEL. HOW DARE THE CREATORS DO THIS TO ME. (I’m being facetious I love it I live for this kind of drama this is how i express they were doing good storytelling)

The whole “final chakra” being about letting go of attachments… hmm that felt VERY Star Wars of them… Filoni is this your doing? (Although actually I don’t remember seeing his name on any Book 2 episodes.)

Sokka

My fave continues to be the long-suffering Sokka, just trying to get his family to Omashu, it shouldn’t be this hard!!! This was literally what I wrote at the time of watching “Chapter Two: The Cave of Two Lovers,” and OH LITTLE DID I KNOW!!! [cut to Book 3… lmao… anyways]

Sokka making a map to help keep track of the maze-like cave/tunnel is actually really clever. I can’t believe people think he’s stupid. I mean, sure, it didn’t end up working, but that’s because the cave was magic or whatever, and that is beyond his control!

Side note, but lol at Sokka’s purchases and love for shopping. His ridiculous belt! How excited he was that it matched his bag!

Second side note, I was pretty excited to see that gif where Sokka is making that “I’m watching you” gesture and then goes “Water tribe!”

Katara

Yeah, notice how I don’t have much to say about Katara? It’s not that I don’t like her or that I don’t think she’s interesting, but. I just don’t really have a lot to say about her. 

I was amused by how she handled those bullies. My impression before I started watching was that she was going to be this like, pure and GoodTM character, but she definitely has her flaws and that is better.

I really liked the scene where she is able to calm Aang down while he’s in the Avatar state. There was good build up to that, showing her worry every time he entered it and her awareness of the fact that he only ever enters it when feeling upset. The fact that she was able to do that clearly Meant Something. So again, I suppose, I really feel up to this point that the show is very much like “Aang/Katara Endgame!” it felt very obvious to me. And I knew before starting the show that Zuko and Katara are a thing — but Aang and Katara is just so heavy handed that it was impossible for me to ship them with anyone else. They were just foundational to the show. Like it always felt like a foregone conclusion to me, almost as if they were established from the beginning although they obviously weren’t.

Toph

I spent like, the second half of Book 1 thinking “WHEN TOPH WHEN TOPH!” Imagine my ire that she still isn’t around for the first five episodes of Book 2, which is titled “EARTH” my goodness.

But OH was I delighted by “Chapter 6: The Blind Bandit”!!! I loved her intro, I loved how Aang is just immediately in awe of her skills when he sees her. He knows she’s exactly the teacher he’s been waiting for. “She waited and listened!” he says. Yes. I love it. (But also, lol at Sokka booing Aang.) Despite this, Aang really does not handle that first interaction very well!

So frustrating how her parents were treating her. “She’s fragile and helpless!” what a thing to say about your daughter. [Also you literally named her “tough”?!] And he is basically going to imprison her, wtf. & how do you get off saying “the avatar is no longer welcome here”?! smh children whose parents try to “control” their kids always end up being the most rebellious.

I was amused that “my dad changed his mind” apparently was a popular lie daughters use on this show. *facepalm*

I liked the contrast between how Toph wanted to teach Aang and how Katara thought he should be taught! That was interesting. And yeah, Toph certainly lives up to her name. 

Zuko & Iroh

Spent a good portion of the early part of this season wondering how Zuko and Iroh could possibly be related to the awful Fire Lord (and Azula for that matter — jeez she is nuts!), and longing to know what happened to Zuko’s mom. (Obviously that would be answered soon!)

Knowing that Zuko eventually joins the Aang crew, but also remembering that I never saw Iroh with them, made me SEVERELY worried that something terrible would happen to Iroh. And I spent the entire rest of the series worrying about that. Uh, especially since, apparently Iroh is hopeless at Survival 101. Honestly that was surprising to me. 

Zuko deciding they needed to split up was devastating!!! No!!! I loved the adventures of Zuko & Iroh!! He said, “There's no reason for us to stick together,” and I was like, “Yes there is you idiot! Because you’re family and you love each other!!!” I was so sad. I mean, also Iroh is currently the only person who likes Zuko, so, you know, that might be a good reason to stay with him. Just a thought. 

The last thing Zuko needs is to be alone, that will NOT be good for his issues. And lo and behold, look! Immediately, he’s struggling on his own. But I did like that episode (“Chapter 7: Zuko Alone”) because we get to see Zuko’s mom! (Uh, did she have a name?) Turtle ducks are so cute.

“Everything I’ve done I’ve done to protect you.” THIS. SLAYED. ME!!!!!! I mean, y’all know Rogue One is my jam so this parallel with Zuko’s mom and Galen Erso????? I lost it. I just lost it. Plus, though it isn’t confirmed until later, we can tell she’s sacrificing herself to save Zuko and just. (A) what a completely messed up family, but (B) MY HEART. SHE BETTER BE ALIVE is all I’m saying.

Interesting side note: they never show Ozai’s face in the early seasons. 

If you assumed that I was delighted to see Iroh has been tailing Zuko this whole time, you’d be correct. I had hoped that was the case and was very glad it was. Although *facepalm* again at Zuko. I suppose he had no way of knowing Katara had healing powers but it was so frustrating knowing if he had just listened to them for one minute they could have helped Iroh after Azula blasted him. At least he made him tea and nursed him back to health. 

If the evil advisor of Ba Sing Se had files on everyone and knew everything that went on… I mean… did he know about Iroh and Zuko? 

I didn’t jot down any notes about this at the time, BUT. Man. Did I ADORE Zuko and Iroh’s adventures in Ba Sing Se. I mean it was a nice relief from all the other crazy stuff happening. (Not happy to see Jet though. Ugh.) 

Finally, though, Zuko’s betrayal at the very end of the season totally shocked me. Because of spoilers, I knew he’d join Aang’s crew, and so it was so confusing! And such a regression, I really didn’t understand it and was very worried about what it would mean for his redemption arc — but more on that in the next post, don’t want to get ahead.

Azula

Oh. Boy. Again, I knew she was going to be crazy, but I don’t think I was prepared for just how messed up she is. “Do the tides command this ship. You said they would not allow us…” Jeez that is pedantic in a very bizarre way and obviously not what was meant… Yikes.

Also, Azula is much better at finding Zuko than Zuko is at finding Aang. Just a stray observation.

“Father regrets your banishment. He wants you home.” [insert IT’s A TRAP gif here]

“If the Earth Kingdom finds us, they'll have us killed. If the Fire Nation finds us, they'll turn us over to Azula. Earth kingdom it is.” Yeah, this line was hilarious but also sad. It really said a lot about Azula, and Zuko and Iroh’s relationship with her.

Had no idea Azula had her own crew. It was incredibly clear that Ty Lee felt coerced to join her and didn’t really want to, but that was less clear to me for Mai. Mainly seemed like Mai was bored with where she was and was just like “shrugs might as well do evil stuff.” 

I did know that a character named “Mai” would eventually be Zuko’s love interest (and it is pretty heavily portrayed that she has a crush on him), so at this point, I was very much like, “Hmm. This character is too apathetic and annoying, I don’t want her to end up with Zuko!” Plus, the fact that her name was pronounced “May,” (which was not how I thought “Mai” was pronounced) and I knew Zuko would have a thing with a lady in a tea shop, I wasn’t 100% sure Zuko/Mai were end game. 

“She’s crazy and she needs to go down.” I think Iroh said this. I just don’t know what to say. Why is Azula the way she is? That’s never entirely clear to me. In some ways, it’s implied she was just Like That (in the flashback where mom is like “What is wrong with you?”) and perhaps she’s just her father’s daughter. I don’t need a reason, per se. Idk. I just don’t know what to say to her. She clearly needs help. 

[whateverthedragonswant]

and the rewatch continues

So rewatching most of season 5 and dipping into season 6, after coming from season 4, I found some things very interesting, things I actually had forgotten about and some that just hit differently now that the show has ended:

Season 4:

Brothers - different iterations: Had that finale happened after this season, it might have made better sense (though I STILL say the manner of Dean’s death is laughable)

Destiel & Cas: While Cas and Dean have some uncomfortable staring contests and there’s chemistry, I didn’t get the whole Destiel vibe (this is just my personal take), yes there’s a bond there, a growing partnership so to speak but I feel like Cas is not around enough for it to be in the forefront of the story or even to demand Dean’s attention in a way. Like Cas made his big entrance in 4x01 and we saw how things took off from there for the story and for this connection/bond between he and Dean but Dean is early season Dean and Cas is early season Cas. Though I found Cas’ interest in everything Dean Winchester to be intriguing (and he put Dean back together with his own hands, I just...this really does become the greatest love story ever told, I swear), I personally didn’t get the whole UST vibes that has been talked about. I actually found myself wanting to go deeper into Cas’ story (a la 6x20 style) aside from Dean’s and Sam’s. 

Anna: That whole night with Anna was purely that: a night. There wasn’t a whole lot of chemistry between Jensen and Julie and it’s very clear that this whole sex-on-last-night-on-earth thing is for comfort, for both characters. I kind of get why they switched up gears there for Dean’s angel role, even if they didn’t intend for Destiel to read as romantic at all initially. 4x09 & especially 4x10 were so obviously trying to ying and yang the brothers and the sides that had chosen them/complemented them: Anna | Ruby, Heaven | Hell -> eventually Michael | Lucifer. But back to Anna, while I enjoyed her character and would have loved to delve deeper with her, I am glad Cas was the one who got to stay. Anna and Dean had no chemistry, outside of a couple of glances before the big hookup/last night on Earth deal, there wasn’t really anything there. Tbf, they didn’t have a lot of private time before that, except maybe one convo. To me, in this scenario, Anna was a source of comfort (after she tells Dean he needs to forgive himself for what happened in Hell which I very much appreciated, someone had to tell him that) and attraction, letting her have her last night on Earth, a hookup, etc. But there was nothing deeper there. And for this bond with an angel to happen, there needed to be something deeper there. Perhaps had Anna been around longer and didn’t go the way she did in season 5, it might have but I honestly tend to doubt it. We all know Cas and Dean’s (Misha’s and Jensen’s) natural chemistry is off the charts. I’m not sure Anna (Julie) could have competed with that had both Cas and Anna stuck around together. I know I’m completely biased here, but I almost felt like Anna and Cas had more chemistry together, it might have been because they got more face time, I’m not sure. But I thoroughly enjoyed watching it all go down again.

Adam: Omg I forgot about how Adam wasn’t Adam when Dean and Sam first met him. That was heartbreaking on so many levels, but mostly for Adam and his mom dying the way they did and of course, for Dean and Sam. Namely Dean because he was the most affected by finding out about Adam’s existence. And I swear I fell in love with Dean more in that episode as a character because despite his pain, his anger, his hurt, he still tries to do the right thing by Adam, to honor his dad’s wishes. And John...that mf’er doesn’t deserve any of those boys as his sons. What an asshole through and through. 

Season 5:

Destiel & Cas: And now we see Cas becoming a bit more forefront and the vibe has changed...slightly. Now it’s a partnership turning into a friendship. Dean and Cas get a bit more face time and it shows. 5x03 was awesome and of course the wholly unnecessary line of “One, Bert and Ernie are gay” -- like where did that come from? I still loved it. It was tough to see Dean and Sam go their separate ways in the beginning but we still got some gold out of it with 5x03 and 5x04. And thankfully, we get more into not only more of the angel and apocalypse lore this season, but we also get to see how Cas’ relationship with the Winchesters is changing and more of what makes Cas tick as a character in his own right. And of course, bamf!Cas was very present. 

Brothers: Once again, had that finale happened after this season, it might have made more sense (sans the junk death) - because it’s very obvious that the co-dependency is alive and well here and it would have made more sense for their characters - while they have others outside of the two of them they are caring about (Bobby, Ellen, Jo just to name a few), it’s still the exclusive Winchester-only club. I truly enjoyed watching these two working together and moving towards the season finale. Dean’s memory of Sam and the fireworks, Dean talking about how Sam’s best memories weren’t the same as his (shocker, John Winchester is a d-bag, I’ll keep saying it), Dean struggling to make the decision to say yes to Michael, having to agree with the plan for Sam to say yes to Lucifer to try to trap the latter, Dean showing up to the cemetery -- all of it was incredible and the two of them were the beating heart of the show at that point. 5x22 will always be one of my favorite season finales for that show. It was pure awesomeness, truly epic and perfect.

Dean: holy hell, they really, really threw a lot into Dean this season - not that they hadn’t before, but damn. Each season just amps up the Dean game, just like I remember, and I am happily here for it again. No offense to Sam at all, but Dean is just so complex, so complicated yet straightforward, and there’s so many layers to him that they just keep peeling back and they feed us well each season. I swear, if you turned the sound off and just watched that scene where Dean tells Zachariah to call Michael, where Dean and Sam go their separate ways, you would know exactly everything Dean is feeling and thinking thanks to the incredible talent of one Mr. Jensen Ackles. Just really incredible. How this man never got nominated for an Emmy at any point for this show just astounds me. Yes, I know that show wasn’t considered a contender for that type of award run, but dammmnnnn. He deserves it and more. Watching this season and season 4 really brought back the original reasons I fell in love with Dean as a character in the first place. One of the best characters ever, I’m telling you. And may I just say, I hated that they brought back John’s leather jacket for him in the season finale but I get it, it was Kripke’s swan song (did I just do that? I believe I did) so we of course went back to core Winchester things, not just in story but every element. I’m ngl, I was so glad to see Dean shed it though when he is sitting down to dinner with Lisa and Ben.

Apocalypse: I thoroughly enjoyed this whole plot line - this really was high stakes, more than ever before, and though angels were dicks, there was Lucifer of course and a mysterious though mostly absent God behind the curtain - you just never knew what was going to be thrown at you next, just like the boys were going through.

Heaven/Mary: even though this definitely has to do with Dean more so, I did enjoy them seeing Ash and Pam, Ash’s setup, and of course Mary being there, seeing how such a good memory could be manipulated by the dick angels and the horrible things Mary said to Dean. Of course, I felt for Dean but it was interesting to see that whole scene play out. Plus we got even more confirmation of what we’ve known all along: John is a bonafide asshole and Dean really did experience facets of spousification, even before Mary died (which just makes me so sad for him, I swear if they don’t put a Cas vs John scene in the reboot... because you know Cas will win that thumb war)

Meg: ngl, I wasn’t really crazy about this iteration of Meg - I don’t mean Rachel Miner’s version, just this particular performance, which I chalk up to whoever decided they wanted her to go this route in her performance - I couldn’t believe it was the same character, the same actress - I am so glad the show/Rachel developed the character we all love to hate and secretly really love to how she was in later seasons

Jo: omg Jo. I have to admit, in season 2, in the first episode she showed up in, I despised her. She was like that bratty teenage kid who’s a real pain in the ass and whines and doesn’t get it. But after that episode, I grew to love her with each one she was in. She became a bamf in her own right and I loved seeing that come through this season especially. Her death was horrific (what is it with this show killing off bamf female hunters in such a gruesome way? it brought back horrible Eileen flashbacks for me personally, and for them to turn Meg and Ketch into somewhat redeemable characters after that... you know, I swear...) but heroic and I had never been more proud of my girl. Except the scene with Dean in the kitchen. As much as I love my chaotic hunter son, I was glad to see Jo flip him off in the way she did. So proud. And then her goodbye with Dean, I had forgotten exactly what he did so I was going “omg, she just saved you, Dean, this girl has feelings for you, she deserves at least a kiss, kiss her. right. the fuck. now!” and sure enough, he did, on the forehead, which I was like okay, well I get it, he doesn’t return those feelings but he does care about her but dammit, she deserved for him to plant one on her. and then he did and I was just gone, I was a complete bawling mess. And her goodbye scene with Ellen, and then her death along with Ellen’s sacrificing herself to stay by Jo’s side and give the boys a chance to get out of there...yeah, I didn’t stop crying for about five minutes. I cannot tell you how much I miss those characters and I would have sold someone else’s right arm to make their return in the series finale happen. Besides the obvious characters that should have been present, Ellen, Jo, and Ash deserved to be there (just not Samantha and Chad, if we can get a “Cas helped” for the third major character/lead, we can also get a “Ellen and Jo went to assist in setting up the honeymoon suite above the roadhouse - I said what I said).

John: usually, I cannot abide giving any time to this jerk, never mind talking about him, but I have to say I enjoyed seeing pre-loss John in 5x13. That conversation he has with Sam I think is so glaringly important. I know it was for Sam to forgive John and heal, but the fact that John himself is saying “how could he do that to you? he was supposed to protect you” -- yep, that was pure poetic cinema in my eyes. Because pre-loss John is right, how dare post-loss John do that to his boys? There’s no excuse anyone or this show can give him. As much as I love JDM, post-loss John Winchester will never be okay in my book.

Adam: omg Adam. First of all, I loved his dynamic with Sam and Dean. I really, really wish we could have had him around longer just for that alone. What an awesome character we could have had giving Dean and Sam a run for their money. “Well, we’re working on the power of love.” “How’s that going?” “Not so great.” -- give me an episode of the three brothers on a milk run hunt (sans generic mask-wearing vampmimes) with all of the fixings and I swear we would get done!Sam, consistently being roasted between Dean and Adam, and then Dean thinking he’s got a mutual now, a BFF, and Adam turning right around to roast him as well. It would be epic, I tell you, epic. I wish Adam had gotten a better end, this season and at the end of the series. He certainly deserved better. And this may be a random observation but why did Michael take Adam at all? I know the countdown had begun and he was desperate to grab a vessel so he could fight Lucifer at the appointed time and Dean was not giving in (that he knew of), but what chance of victory did he think he had without using his true vessel? Using that logic, I guess Michael’s end in the series makes more sense now...? Who knows.

Chuck: Swan Song (5x22) and the lines, “Endings are hard. Any chapped ass monkey with a keyboard can poop out a beginning but endings are impossible. You try to tie up every loose end but you never can. The fans are always gonna bitch. There’s always gonna be holes. And since it’s the ending, it’s all supposed to add up to something. I’m telling you, they’re a raging pain in the ass“ -- did anyone else feel like that was Kripke speaking or is it just me?

Season 6:

the whole Lisa thing: while it was nice to see Dean go domestic, I have to say I was more invested in Dean and Ben’s relationship development than I was with Dean and Lisa’s. The chemistry just wasn’t there, I have to be honest (he and Anna actually had more chemistry for a few minutes than he did with Lisa this whole season). I don’t doubt they loved each other, it was real, and Lisa was good for him at the time but it just didn’t have that spark. I loved Lisa as a character in her own right, but I was happy to see her and Dean eventually go their separate ways. Though my heart broke for Ben on that one. He and Dean really had a whole father-son bond happening there. I appreciated that when Ben called him, even that one time that nothing was really wrong, Dean dropped everything and headed right over. They had a bond of their own happening outside of Dean and Lisa’s. I think Dean ultimately made the right choice in the end to keep Lisa and Ben safe (though they should have been able to choose if they wanted this), but God did that cost him and we see it in that scene outside of the hospital with Sam. How much that hurt for him, and for us to see how it killed him to do it. I’m still grateful that he got to see what the domestic life was like and that he got a reprieve from hunting for a bit. It made complete sense as to why Cas didn’t want to pull him back in to ask for help with Raphael.

Destiel: Welp, now there’s definitely an emotional relationship happening. Meaning the bond has become even more forefront and not only is Dean affected, but we also see that Cas is, too. Dean’s reaction to finding out Cas was working with Crowley the whole time, Cas’ reaction to Dean choosing to save the two boys instead of focusing on finding Eve, Cas’ reaction to Dean’s stance on the Crowley situation, Dean’s finding out Crowley kidnapped Lisa and Ben, Cas asking Dean to trust him, Dean seeing Cas becoming the new God and needing to summon Death, etc. It was fantastic. While it hurt during some moments, I enjoyed seeing the dynamics and reactions to these situations play out. This is definitely a friendship now, a family relationship formed (and still forming) like Dean says in 6x20. Imho, Jensen and Misha knocked it out of the park this season when it came to that relationship. I loved it.

Cas: holy hell, 6x20 has become one of my all-time favorite episodes of SPN. I loved seeing Cas’ POV. Cas was already a fave character of mine but this episode made me fall in love with him all over again. This was incredible and I’m so thankful they fed us so well with this one. I really enjoyed seeing Cas as a character stepping into the forefront, right there with Dean and Sam. Yes, he was a part of TFW before this, but you have to admit that in this season, it becomes a whole new ball game. Really amazing stuff and of course, Misha slayed it all.

Meg & Megstiel: I was so happy to see the iteration of Meg return that we know from later seasons. Maybe I’m just too used to that version but to me this felt more effortless for the character and for Rachel, that really let both shine. Personally, I’m not a Megstiel shipper. While I love their dynamic, it just isn’t there for me, but I really did enjoy their scenes together. Cas felt as if he needed a little shaking up so to speak so I think she was perfect for that. Plus, I have a hard time forgiving those in the show that sic Hellhounds on my bamf female hunters so that might be partially the reason for my bias, just saying. (I never really forgave Ketch either)

Samuel...& Co: I just...why? Don’t get me wrong, I liked Mitch but this felt a bit...I don’t know...off? Other than some place for Soulless!Sam to go while Dean was playing house and for nabbing Alphas for Crowley, I don’t get what the point of this story line was? Was it to show us that Mary’s dad was a d-bag? Check. Was it to show us how people sometimes make the worst decisions when it comes to their family? Double check. Like, we kind of already got that and it was just unnecessary confirmation if that makes sense. And the thing that kills me is that Samuel was in Hell (or goes to Hell, I kind of did other things in the background during that arc) but he loved his daughter enough to betray her sons and do the wrong thing but John gets to go to Heaven? This still confounds me. Though I enjoyed Gwen and it was a shame she couldn’t be a family contact in another state for the boys later on to pop up every now and then.

Soulless!Sam: I enjoyed this part of Sam’s arc but I won’t lie, I was relieved like everyone else when he finally got his soul back though waited with bated breath for the other shoe to drop. But it was interesting to see this side of Sam.

Dad!Dean: I know I mentioned Dean and Ben above, but that one episode with the shifter!baby, that was priceless and God, did I love it.

I just loved going back to this for both boys

[makeyourownmyth]

best seen in 2020.

My usual caveats from previous years are still applicable here: I don’t watch most of the major nominations the years they come out, and I’m usually not much for theaters and/or current TV. However, due to the pandemic, we watched a loooooooot of content. Here’s just a list of movies that I watched or rewatched this year, that were neither terrible, nor great, but I want to make note of:

Toy Story 4, The Brothers Bloom, Happiest Season, The Peanut Butter Falcon, Moana, Mr. Right, Moulin Rouge, Ocean’s Eleven, Spring Breakers, X-Men: Dark Phoenix (this might have been the worst movie I watched this year?), Widows, Gattaca, Black Klansman, Primer, It 2, Shazam (this maybe should have gone on the Honorable Mentions - it was fun), Training Day, Parasite (OK, now I have to update my Honorable Mentions), The Green Book, Strange Days, Elf, Love & Basketball, Above the Rim, Coach Carter.

That being said, there was some bad stuff, and I try not to shit on any artist’s creations too much, because I know no one sets out to make something bad, but these didn’t work for me. 

Anti

Uncut Gems - It’s not that it was BAD, it was just too stressful for me to enjoy.

Brick - It wasn’t even close to enjoyable on a rewatch that I encouraged my partner to take on for the first time. I felt bad. 

Hereditary - Neither a scary movie, nor a good movie.  

The Witch - Same, but maybe better made?

Under The Skin - Jesus, this was terrible. Maybe I’m not artsy enough to get it?

Now, however, let’s get to the good stuff. 

Honorable Mention TV

Avatar - I can’t legitimately put it on the Best Of list, because I’m not done yet, but I’m on Book 3, after finally actually getting started. I think I tried to start this in 2016, and i know all my nerd friends have been yelling at me for a long time because I haven’t gotten to it yet, and as someone who’s almost done, I can say: they were right! It’s great. 

Ozark - S1 was great. It fell off a fucking CLIFF after that. Ignore people who tell you that you HAVE to watch this. They’re wrong. It’s fine. 

The Last Dance - I know the world is obsessed with Michael Jordan, and I’m glad it came out when it did, but really, all it did for me was confirm that he’s an asshole who was very fortunate to play when he did. And also that the Bulls were fucking phenomenal. 

His Dark Materials - Neither as bad as some of my friends think, nor nearly as good as the books (obviously) but also not good enough that I’ve even started S2 yet, so....I guess it’s fine? 

The Mandalorian S2 - I think they know what they’re doing, and it’s super enjoyable, and I loved the ending, but I’m also curious as to where they’re going now. 

Fargo S3 - Given how good the rest of the series is (other than my distaste for S2, dealt with below, and out of step with pop culture) I thought this one was a misstep, 

Orphan Black - I cannot believe how late I was to this, and how good it still was. It really fell apart toward the end, but the acting was incredible, and the fact that they got to tell the story they wanted to was amazing. 

Best TV

7. All the Smoke with Kobe (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3R3KIyEgCgc) - Maybe it was just his death, but it hits hard, and I miss him. Does this even count as TV? 

6. Looking for Alaska - It felt like gratuitous masochism to watch this and enjoy it, being 20 years older than when I fell for it, and feeling ashamed of the young person I was, but even knowing what was coming, I was weeping when it happened. Even knowing that they were ultimately going on a fruitless search and yelling at the TV while the Colonel and Pudge were searching for “signs” and hating them for it, I remember feeling like everything HAD to happen for a reason when I was this young... So yeah. It’s pure nostalgia for me. I’d be super interesting in hearing how kids responded to it. 

5. Locke and Key - I get that some people feel like they don’t need old shit in a new medium, but for me, I’m always up to try it out. If it’s fun, I’ll stick with it. And this is. It’s fun, it’s got some of the old shit, it’s got some new shit, and it’s a treat to see my favorite comic of the last decade in a new medium. Haters need a new bit. 

Fargo s1 and s4 (I didn’t love S3) - I know that I’m in the minority here, but I think 1 and 4 are the best and 2 was good, and 3 was fine. I literally watched all of this show this year, though, so I didn’t have the same time to digest as others. But I think that’s a benefit in some regards? 

4. Magicians s5 - One of the saddest conversations of the last year to two was when a nerd friend of mine said he didn’t like The Magicians because all of the characters were whiny and self-indulgent. For me, that was almost literally the point: they shoved Q into the corner and told the story of the others (at least one episode quite self-referentially so) and it was so much better for that. I wish it hadn’t ended, but I’m glad they left it where they did, because it was so good.  

3. Devs esp. The beginning of e5 - Jesus. The show of the year? Except for the fact that Watchmen came out at the tail end of last year, and I didn’t have it on my 2019 list? I mean, honestly, is there a show more tailored to me? I’m not gonna get into any spoilers, but it’s a quick watch, and it’s fucking fantastic. Watch it, have your mind blown by the concept, especially in the beginning sequence of E5, and then stick around for the subpar ending where basically all of the threads are resolved in the least good way. 

2. Watchmen - This deserves multiple re-watches and all the praise that people heaped upon it. 

1. The Good Place - I know, objectively, that Watchmen was a better show than The Good Place. But this is my list, and I’ll be damned if anything overtakes my favorite sitcom (maybe of all time?) for best of the year. I know it barely just ended this year, and there’s plenty of acclaim to go around for this show, but honestly, every time I talk to anyone about it, it feels like they kind of laugh it off. This show is not only worth your time, but should almost be considered must-watch material. If more people watched this show, we wouldn’t need the insult “sophomoric” to describe people who’ve just had their minds blown by Philosophy 101, and we’d be better off as a species. 

Honorable Mention Movies

In this order, and you can take the comedies and make them the only honorable mentions, if you’d like to make a nice, even top 10. (Until I saw Tenet the night before I posted this.( (And then I looked back at the playing cards that we use to randomly choose movies and I found that I needed to modify the Honorable Mentions and the Best Of lists.) 

21 and 22 Jump Street - In general, I’m not a fan of comedies. So I’m happy I watched these, thanks to Nathan Zed, and they’re funny. Good work guys. 

Palm Springs - Apparently there’s now backlash against Groundhog Day? I dunno, man, it was fun, and all the actors seemed like they were having a good time, and I was down for it. 

Parasite - I can’t add anything to this that hasn’t already been shouted from the rooftops, so let me just briefly say that I thought it was great, but it didn’t quite make the list of best. The combo of genres was great, the cast was fantastic, but what I loved the most about it was how quiet it was.

Best Movies

10. Blinded by the Light - Way more resonant than I thought it’d be from the previews, and I already thought it was gonna be stellar. I didn’t take into account TIME along with place, and that made a hell of a difference for this movie. 

9. Shoplifters - Yeesh. What a tough watch, but so good, and so necessary. For me, I think we watched it back to back to back with Parasite and I, Tonya, and this one just stood out so much more. The storyline was softer all the way through, but really had gravitas simultaneously. 

8. Tenet - It was fucking fun! I don’t get the hate! I liked it, I’ll like it more next time I see it, and I wish I’d seen it on the big screen, but I’m super glad I could see it on my TV! 

7. I, Tonya - Geez, what a powerhouse of acting. Not only did they get me to feel good about the villain of my childhood, they got me to feel good about Margot Robbie, who I’d only thought of as a hot lady before. Superb acting from everyone else, too, and what a great pick up to be like, yeah, this is the story we’re gonna tell. 

6. I Am Not Your Negro - I avoided watching it for so long because I was already depressed this year, and I didn’t think I needed any more of that, but it turns out I did, and I always do, from Baldwin. He’s a master for a reason. 

5. Hamilton - I know there was some backlash with the time difference, and I’m sure it was better to see it pre-2016 in the theater, where it’s meant to be seen, but I’m not a billionaire New Yorker, and I was plenty happy to see it when and where I could. 

4. Won’t You Be My Neighbor - I mean...what do you think? It’s so much exactly what you’re thinking it is, but then it’s even better, because it’s the real deal, and he was so good, and it’s so pure. Watch it. 

3. Her Smell - Elizabeth Moss has already gotten all the acclaim, but to play this different of a role, in a movie that felt as stressful as Uncut Gems, but pulled off an actual plot so much more successfully? I can’t believe this one didn’t get more pub, but then again, yes I can: it’s a movie about a girl band that rages against the machine, and she’s got severe issues. Small surprise that the people didn’t react well. Seek this one out! 

2. Arrival - Yes, I am going to totally cheat and put a movie that’s appeared on my list (sooooo long ago) as the #2 entry this year. You know why? Cuz fuck 2020, and this is a great movie, and it’s the movie that made me feel second best this year. It’s incredible, and I know people appreciated it in its time, but I feel like they should appreciate it even more. 

1. Moonlight - It’s not a shock, nor am I trying to appease anyone with anything. It’s just that I finally watched it, and it’s the best movie I saw this year. I don’t think I could possibly add anything to the authentic critics who have already heaped praise upon it, but I do have to say that it’s all due, and so much more. The acting obviously stands out, but the direction, from the color palettes, to the choice of when and where (and how) to break it up, are all masterful choices.  

[woolishlygrim]

Winter Weebwatch #6

Infinite Dendrogram is the lone late-in-the-week show that always makes me late posting these. If it wasn’t around, I could get these done on Tuesdays.

Anyway, kind of a mixed week this week, from the highs of ID: Invaded (now firmly cemented as the best show of the season, nobody’s coming even close to beating it by now) to the lows of Darwin’s Game (still incredibly forgettable).

ID: Invaded.

★★★★★

Another five star episode this week, as the gang decides to enter Narihisago/Sakaido’s Well, sending newly minted serial killer detective Hondomachi in, where she takes the identity of Miyo Hijiriido. Their goal is to discover whether John Walker, the mysterious red-coated man who has appeared in multiple killers’ Wells, and who might have supplied both the Challenger and the Gravedigger with video equipment, also influenced Narihisago to become a serial killer.

While what they find is fairly in line with what Wells have been like so far (in this case, Narihisago’s Well is a numbered board where lightning strikes seemingly at random, somehow never striking the same place twice), things start to go distinctly strange once Hondomachi investigates further: She eventually comes across a perfect recreation of the device for entering Wells, registered as active and diving into the Well of a woman who was the last intended victim of the Challenger, who escaped after Narihisago killed him.

This, we quickly learn from Momoki, is impossible: The woman in question wasn’t a serial killer, so how could she have a Well; the same woman wasn’t important to Narihisago, but rather to Momoki himself; and most importantly, the technology didn’t exist at the time Narihisago’s Well would have formed, so there’s no possible way he could have imagined a version of it.

Things get much stranger when Momoki is immediately arrested, with officers informing him that not only have they traced access attempts from the video equipment to his computer, but they also found John Walker’s distinct red frockcoat and cane in his home, and the body of the Well technology’s missing creator buried in his garden. 

So, this is officially the point where things have gone extremely weird, and the fan theory that’s been going around that the whole show is actually taking place in someone’s Well is growing … ever more plausible, as the show floats the idea of entering Wells within Wells and separate layers of unreality. The evidence that Momoki is John Walker is all a bit too neat for episode seven out of thirteen, so it’s doubtless not actually him, but beyond that, it’s impossible to predict where this show will go from here.

Any episode that is both technically perfect and which totally upends your understanding of the series is deserving of five stars.

In/Spectre.

★★☆☆☆

Here’s that tone problem again.

The episode opens on a fight scene of sorts between Steel Girder Nanase and Kuro, before segueing into a flashback to Kuro’s backstory (which I didn’t think we’d get this early, but sure) and then into an explanation of what Nanase actually is.

It’s … not as jarring as the tone problems in other episodes, but the flashback to Kuro’s origin is far, far darker than anything else in the episode, to the point where it feels staggeringly out of place. The story of Kuro’s powers, in which he is fed the flesh of intelligent beings without him knowing about it by his grandmother, only to then watch his siblings all die before, as the seeming lone survivor, his grandmother decides to begin experimenting on him, is the kind of sequence that wouldn’t be out of place in a much grimmer and more disturbing anime. It clashes hard with In/Spectre’s generally more comedic tone.

The explanation of the identity of Steel Girder Nanase is also a little disappointing. After setting us up for some kind of reveal that the real Nanase is still alive, this episode tells us that no, no, Nanase really is dead, Steel Girder Nanase isn’t her but rather a spooky meme of her that has come to life. I’m not generally fond of ‘mass human belief changes the nature of the world’ stories anyway, and this comes over as a rather weak plot twist.

It’s an enjoyable enough episode (although, man, are we really doing the Steel Girder Nanase thing for the rest of the show? After three episodes, it feels like that arc is almost done), but it’s riddled with all the problems we’ve seen before from this show.

Pet.

★★★☆☆

This episode should’ve been a four start one, but it gets a little bogged down in its own terminology and worldbuilding to really make it. There’s a lot of talk of peaks, valleys, locks, and images, and since the show has never really adequately explained what all of those are, it’s difficult to shake the feeling that these are things we’re meant to full understand, but can’t because the show hasn’t deigned to give us all of the details.

It doesn’t ruin the story or anything. We know enough of these things to get a basic idea of how they work: The peak is the best memory they have, the valley is the worst, the image is the form they take when traversing memories, and the lock is the guard they have on their own memories. It’s just not clear how those all interact. Why and how is the peak hidden by the valleys? Why does having a weak lock make an image stronger? Why is it necessary to find someone’s peak in order to change their memories?

Since the bulk of this episode relies on understanding those things, though, as Hayashi races to find his way to Tsukasa’s peak, only for Tsukasa to reveal a trick with his image that allows him to link their peaks and crush Hayashi’s mind by flooding it with his own valley, it means you do spend a lot of the episode just kind of … along for the ride, not quite lost, but also only really having a surface understanding of what’s going on.

The end of the episode, which sees Hiroki save Tsukasa from his self-inflicted mindcrush by performing the same trick in reverse, sharing his peak to ‘clean out’ Tsukasa’s, also relies on knowing those things, and so also falls a little flat.

There are some solid emotional beats here, though, and some really vividly disturbing imagery, and that’s nice. We also get formally introduced to the guy who I assume is going to be our next villain, a higher-up at the Company who wants to tap one of the three main characters to keep making ‘babies,’ psychics who are mindless automatons. 

Darwin’s Game.

★★☆☆☆

Honestly, it’s still tough to remember anything that happens in these episodes, even with notes, and this episode, which is decisively a ‘setting things up’ episode instead of a ‘things that happen’ episode, is not helping with matters.

This episode is mostly here for introducing the next two members of our main team, neither of which are given names yet (or are they? I wouldn’t remember if they had been): A man with a lie detector ability and a lot of guns, and a kid with a split personality who has water manipulation ability.

Given that this arc is leaning towards our main team coming together as a clan at the end of this treasure hunt game, it seems to go almost without saying that the Florist isn’t going to survive. He’s the only one on Team Hotel who isn’t also in the opening, and with it having been several episodes since anyone last snuffed it, someone has to die if the show wants to keep its death game cred. So the Florist is, to put it nicely, doomed.

This episode also floats the idea that collecting the rings isn’t the point of the treasure hunt game, but it gives us no reason to care about that. Our protagonist is motivated by just surviving, so all he or any other character needs to do is get three rings and not get killed, with the actual goal of the hunt being … I don’t know, an afterthought, I suppose.

Not exactly compelling material.

Infinite Dendrogram.

★★★☆☆

So, I watched this episode when I hadn’t slept for … I think it was thirty-two hours, at that point? It was a few hours before I actually got some sleep. So I think it’s fair to say I wasn’t exactly watching it attentively.

That said, this episode was okay. Most of it is taken up by another big battle with a monster, with Ray and Nemesis trying to figure out the best way to maximise the advantages their abilities offer them, versus a seemingly impossible foe. Where it falls down somewhat is that, just like the previous huge battle, this one ends exactly the same way -- with Ray gaining a new ability and using that to win the day.

But we do get a nice little flashback with his brother Shu, who we see outside the game is a martial artist who enjoys winning impossible fights. This … might actually be the first time we’ve seen Shu in a very traditionally Anime Big Brother role, instead of as a dorky guy in a bear suit making bear puns. 

The episode even has something of a twist, as it’s revealed that Penguin-Suited Doctor Guy, the one who tricked Ray into getting temporary dog ears, is actually Hugo’s older brother a part of the plan for Dryfe to take over Altar, and the dog ears were a way of him listening in on Ray. I said last week that nothing was really done with that plotline, and the whole thing about Ray randomly being given dog ears by a mad scientist was pointless, so colour me wrong, I suppose.

All this together, along with Penguin’s suggestion that they can defeat Altar without any casualties, makes it seem like the show is gearing up for a Penguin vs Bear Battle of the Big Brothers, which is an interesting prospect, at least.

[carmen-berzattos]

Ok I just wanna say some things about Jane and Raf, and why Raf is my favorite character on the show. (Low key I never use Tumblr so I'm sorry if this post is weird/ formatted wrong- feel free to repost this on your account in a better format if you want haha). Let me know your thoughts! I think people really underestimate the amount of hardship that Rafael has experienced, specifically regarding his family. (Cont.)

To have a (non-biological) dad never truly be proud of you, to have a mom who chose money over you, to learn that your dad isn’t actually your dad and then learn that he was killed, to be constantly worried about your sister- and much, MUCH more is incredibly tough.

Because of all of these things- all Raf EVER wanted was a family. He works so hard to make sure that despite the fact that he didn’t have the family he deserved, he could provide a healthy family for his kids. So reason #1 why I love him is because he has such a great heart, great intentions, and he’s just trying to do the best he can, despite never having a healthy model for how to be a father and how to raise a family.

And side note, I think when we see Raf go into his dark place of drinking and stuff, I think it’s reasonable for people to be critical- but I also think that it makes a lot of sense. He’s got a LOT on his plate, constant pressure that he places on himself to be a good dad, past trauma that he likely hasn’t fully dealt with, and non-consistent support from Jane depending on the part of the show you’re at.

Secondly, one reason I don’t support Jane and Michael is that he perpetually sacrifices his own wants and passions in order to please Jane. I think a lot of people view this as sweet and romantic, but in a healthy relationship, both partners are able to thrive as individuals by going after what they love. The fact that Michael is repeatedly okay with giving up his job for Jane shows that he has to give up a part of himself to be with Jane, and that’s not fair to him.

And Michael just has this chivalrous yet entitled vibe to him that I don’t really like. Like when he was pissed that Jane went on a date after she met him, and that she wasn’t home when he brought her soup. So then he whole ass abused his authority as a police officer by pulling her date over.

Like that whole situation, which was one of the foundational parts of their relationship, was just obnoxious because he acted like he was being selfless by bringing her soup, and a lot of people viewed it as sweet. But in actuality, he wasn’t there out of simple kindness, because if he was he’d drop off the soup and leave. He’s doing all this to win Jane over. He thinks that she must pick him just because he likes her, despite the fact that she also gets to decide for herself what she wants.

But the whole thing of Michael sacrificing his own wants for Jane isn’t the case wth Raf because he, from the start, is Jane’s biggest supporter when it comes to writing. And Raf is pretty honest about his commitment to the hotel, which is what caused problems with their relationship in the beginning- but at least he was true to his own desires.

Then his wants and passions shifted to his kids/ family, and then he worked towards that. And what we see right now, which I’m proud of him for, is him saying that it isn’t fair for him to be dragged along and hurt in the process of Jane trying to figure things out for herself. I respect that she needed to do that, but I applaud Raf for looking out for himself.

I think with the recent episodes what we get to see, is Jane working hard to be the partner Raf deserves- which is great because throughout this ENTIRE show, Raf had tried so so hard to get Jane to choose him. Now Raf must choose Jane, which is an interesting and important shift. Although this is a tough situation, Raf doesn’t feel as powerless and out of control as he’s felt at other points.

Wow, nonnie, let me first and foremost thank you for this incredibly well-thought out thread. I love it so much. And I agree with all of what you said, with the exception of a couple of places, and will simply add on to your points for the most part. 

I resonate so much with everything that you said about Rafael. He’s been through so much since the start of the show and it’s like a nonstop shitstorm for him. From his wife cheating on him with his best friend and all the way to the recent development. Not to mention the issue of his cancer earlier on before the show started. It’s been a rough life for Raf. And the problem is that the writers never actually allowed him a break? He doesn’t get to process? Not on-screen anyways and not off-screen either. Rafael’s mental health issue has been reduced to the issue of him sinking into “his dark place” instead of an actual, legitimate issue of depression and potential substance abuse. And that’s what I’ve always begrudged the writers for. Even this season, when they decided to somewhat give him this SL, we still didn’t get to experience it. And I honestly have no idea whether we’re going to be seeing anymore of it or if we were supposed to take that one episode where he was taking anti-depressants as them “dealing” with the issue of his mental health. And honestly, if that’s all we’re getting, then …. *biggest and longest of sighs*. 

What you said about him wanting a family is really important, too. I see a lot of people ridiculing Rafael for being insecure about Michael. And I’m like, but that makes total sense that he would feel this way? He has serious, deep-rooted abandonment issues that stem from his earlier family life. His father (adoptive father) treated him as lesser and never quite trusted him or had faith in him. His mother abandoned him for money. And when she returned, she only did so to take advantage of him and take something for her criminal master plan. And then he found out that neither of them were his biological parents and the question becomes: who abandoned him in the first place so he would end up with them. So, yes, Raf has Jane and Petra and Mateo and the twins and the Villanuevas, to an extent, but that doesn’t magically make it so that his abandonment issue are dealt with and he’s all good and dandy. That’s not how it works with deep-seated childhood issues. It might not be ideal of him to react so strongly to Michael’s presence, but his fear of losing the love of his life to Michael, AGAIN, makes total sense to me. I hope he’d reacted differently, but I also get it. This is hard and painful for him and is in line with his character. 

And I agree with you that him choosing to remove himself from that situation is also good and healthy for him. I keep seeing people calling him selfish for choosing himself, for closing himself emotionally from a person who hurt him so much. It is besides the point that Jane never intended to hurt him, and that’s important to note, but it’s entirely besides the point. The results of our actions are not always what we intend. Doesn’t mean that they didn’t happen anyways. Such is life. So Rafael deciding that he will not sit around waiting for Jane to make a decision between him and Michael again when it became clear to him that he was not always unflinchingly her choice the way that she has been for him, Rafael deciding that he needs to protect his heart and closing off this part of himself emotionally, deciding that he and Jane are good as coparents but he doesn’t want the romance anymore, is actually a good thing for him, it’s good growth and character development. Because now he’s no longer looking for validation from his relationship with Jane to believe in his self worth. He’s saying, no, this is painful and I don’t want to be in this situation and I need to take care of myself. And him not jumping back into a relationship with Jane the moment she decided that this is what she wants now, him knowing his boundaries and being in tune with his needs and not caving is a good thing for him. This is not something that Rafael would have done a few seasons ago and I’m proud of him for that. 

I think for me the main problem with Michael has always been how one-note he feels. His only true defining characteristic is that he loves Jane and that’s that. Everything else about him takes second place to this love that he has for Jane. Which is all good and nice but if I can’t bring myself to care about one half of the ship because they don’t feel real to me, then I can’t bring myself to fully ship them. I still appreciate their scenes and all, but honestly I look at Michael and I’m like, who are you and what do you want out of life other than Jane? Like he went through all this trauma and losing his memories and all he wants now and all he feels is that he loves Jane?????? He doesn’t feel pain???? No resentment that she moved on and is happy????? My brother kept pointing out that there is no way in hell he wouldn’t feel at least a little bit of resentment that Jane is happy and moved on with Rafael of all people. And he’s right. But all Michael can say is I want you to be happy, so much so that it’s frustrating. Human emotions are complex until Michael is concerned and it frustrates me how he is just a cardboard cut of a Perfect Man. 

And of course Rafael would look bad in comparison, since he seems to display a wider range of emotions and generally act like a normal human person, but I digress. 

I do think the recent shift in dynamic is going to bring a refreshing take on Jane and Rafael’s relationship like it did last episode. I thought seeing Jane as an utter disaster was really interesting and entertaining since we’ve never seen her in this light before. It’s really fun for me to watch this dynamic and I really look forward to seeing where it’ll take us. 

Again, thanks so much for such a thoughtful thread, friend. you’re awesome!