#and her need to know about her dad makes sense
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I need to yap desperately about one single gripe I have with this game. MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD read at your own discretion
The first half is me ranting about how much certain things mean to me and how impacted I was, and the actual gripe comes closer to the end.
I'll preface this by saying this post is about Varric's death and my rage and despair regarding it, but more so about my Rook's.
I've seen people who said they picked up on the hints about whatnot, who knew before the Fade Prison. I was not one of those people. I was so relieved when I saw him after the Prologue that I didn't think twice, because I knew that it would destroy me the second shit started going wrong.
I was already not having a good time when I started the game simply because Varric was getting older. I don't handle aging well or death, and his design showing his age, and the comments he would make about "getting too old for this" just made my heart break.
And then shit got worse. I sobbed disgustingly when that knife went into Varric's chest.
After Rook woke up from talking to Solas and she heard Varric, I was so gods damned relieved. And my Rook was better taken care of by Varric in that year she spent with him than she was in the rest of her entire life.
I cried from the end of Ghilan'nain's fight until the romance scene and on and off after that. I got so used to visiting Varric just to be comforted by his presence. Inquisition was the biggest part of my life for a year and a half when I was just a kid.
I did really bad middle school age writing for it but regardless of the quality, those characters were built up in my head becoming even more than they were in the game. Varric was my biggest support character through everything I was going through at the time.
I don't talk about it much, but I didn't have a great childhood, and I know a lot of people didn't, but I coped with it through writing and video games. Varric was the one supporting me through the abuse I suffered and writing was the way I processed how bad things really were.
When Rook was in the prison she said "What am I going to find here?" And Varric said "I think you already know, kid." I DIDN'T until he said that. The second he said that my entire chest tightened and I just said "No" out loud as I watched Rook find his body.
Now for my real complaint!!!
Rook never gets the chance to grieve Varric. They go from talking to him every day to finding out he's dead and it was all a lie. I have personally never been more fucking pissed at Solas than I am now. But Rook comes back and they have that kind of "closing off" scene with Varric's empty bed (which was so hard to go through btw). And then they fuck their pookie LIKE I CANNOT BE THE ONLY ONE UPSET ABT THAT
FYM I gotta find out my dad is dead and then Rook is up for boning like there's no fucking way unless it's to cope. And at least pertaining to the Lucanis romance, Rook is processing everything that happened and they can say "So much has happened, I just don't know how to feel."
And rather than getting to process that in some kind of way, the devs said nah this scene serves one singular purpose, and Lucanis says "I do" and then dicks them down.
Personally, I felt very dismissed despite being overjoyed about finally having the romance scene, I couldn't even enjoy it with everything that happened prior.
Rook deserved the chance to completely break down after everything they went through. Tbh i don't know how they kept it together. Varric said "don't get all misty eyed" and i thought to myself that's way too delicate a term for what's happening here, I was fully ugly crying.
Fuck your "I had a good run" I still need you bitch.
All this to say I'm very upset, and I'm running my second playthrough and every time I look at, hear, or talk to Varric I tear up again. Wtf Bioware.
Rook should've gotten the chance to actually talk about what Solas did to them, especially in the sense that he made them believe Varric was still there. Or at least get to properly grieve the person who was their closest friend for a long time.
I have very strong feelings about this obviously
#dragon age the veilguard spoilers#dragon age the veilguard#datv spoilers#datv#datv varric#dav#dav spoilers#dragon age#dragon age 4 spoilers#dragon age 4#dragon age dreadwolf#dragon age dreadwolf spoilers#dragon age varric#varric#varric tethras#da varric#dragon age the veilguard companions#dragon age the veilguard romance#lucanis#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#da4 lucanis#dragon age lucanis#lucanis x rook#lucanis romance#lucanis spoilers#taylorâs a yapper đŁď¸
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3.37 Soulmates
Today Iâm spending some time with Pops. While I was camping, he found out that the LGBT center where heâs been working forever will be closing in just a couple weeks and heâll be out of a job. It wasnât unexpectedâtheyâve been having funding issues for a whileâbut it still sucks. Unfortunately, Dad is in San My for a gig this weekend, so I figure Pops could use some company.
âIâm really sorry about your job,â I tell him as he finishes washing the dishes. âAre you guys gonna be okay?â
âWe have a good amount in savings, and Iâve already been in contact with someone at the LGBT center in Del Sol. Theyâve all but offered me a position there that pays more and has more flexibility.â
âWow, thatâs great! So I guess you wonât have much of a reason to stay in Evergreen Harbor, then.â
âNot really. We could probably find a smaller place closer to the LGBT center.â
I know what that means. Thereâs no reason my parents should have to pay for another 3 bedroom house when their kids are grown. âI guess itâs time for me to find a place, too.â
âIâm sorry to spring it on you like this, but I think youâre ready for it.â
âYeah, I am. I really appreciate you guys taking me in for as long as you did.â
âYouâve come a long way, Johnny. Youâll be just fine.â
âWhat about you? Youâll be all alone when Dad is traveling.â
âThatâs the good thing about this job. Iâll be able to work remotely some, so I can travel with Dad sometimes.â
âOh, thatâs good then. I know itâs not easy for you two to be away from each other.â I pause. Thereâs something thatâs been on my mind since I came back from my camping trip, and Pops seems like the perfect person to help me figure it out. âDo you think you and Dad are soulmates?â
âSoulmates? Hmm.â He stops for a moment to consider. âNo, I donât think we are,â he finishes.
âReally? Why not?â I'm taken aback by his answer. What does he mean, they're not soulmates?
âWell, you remember how Dad and I met, right?â
âYeah, you saw each other at a protest and sparks flew or something cheesy like that.â
âMm-hmm. But I donât think Iâve ever told you the full story of what happened that night. Before I ended up at the protest, I was at your momâs apartmentâshe told me she needed to talk to me about something. Instead, I told her I was gay and couldnât be in a relationship with her anymore, and I leftâwithout finding out that she was pregnant.â
âOh. She was going to tell you that night?â
âYes, until she decided that I wasnât the kind of man that should raise children. If things had been differentâif she had told me she was pregnant before I came out to herâI would have stayed.â
âYou wouldâve kept pretending to be straight?â I can't imagine what his life would have been like but it sounds pretty terrible. And to think he would have chosen that because of me and Chantal?
âFor a while at least. And who knows, maybe eventually I would have found someone else to love and Iâd still be happy. But I wouldnât have met your dad that night.â
âOk, but that didnât happen. What does that have to do with being soulmates?â
âBecause, Johnny, if Iâd stayed with her a little longer then the things that happened to you and Chantal at your momâs house wouldnât have happened. I would have been there to keep you safe and well cared for. I just canât believe that your Dad and I were meant to be together when the circumstances that led to us meeting were also the circumstances that led to my children being hurt and neglected.â
âWell, maybe itâs fate and you wouldâve met a different way.â I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around what Pops is saying. A world where he and Dad aren't together just doesn't make sense.
âMaybe. But I donât think any of these hypotheticals really matter. Like you said, thatâs not what happened. What matters is that today, in the here and now, I canât imagine my life without him. Any reason in particular why youâre thinking about soulmates?â He raises his eyebrows knowingly.
âI guess itâs more that Iâm wondering how you know if someone is the right person for you, but it kind of sounds like itâs not that simple.â
âWell, a sign isnât going to drop down from the heavens that says âThis person is the one,â but it doesnât have to be complicated. Find the person you canât imagine your life without. I donât know if thatâs what you were wanting to hear, but I hope it answers your question.â
Find the person you canât live without. Maybe there arenât signs falling from the sky, but those words are about as close as Iâll get. âIt does," I tell him. "It may not be the answer I was expecting, but I think it cleared something up for me.â
âI see. Do you want to talk about it?"
Normally I would jump at the chance to get some input, but now I don't feel like I need it. I shake my head. âNo, I think I can handle it from here.â The thought makes me nervous, but I canât avoid this. I need to talk to Lacey.
Previous | Beginning of story | Beginning of chapter | Next
#hmm what do you think he's going to tell her?#ts4#sims 4#ts4 story#simblr#sims story#sims storytelling#simlit#sims community#show us your story#stksafeharbor#safeharborstory#sh:chapter3#sh:johnny#sh:solomon
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LET YOUR DAD DIE: IT'S FINE IT'S FINE IT'S WHAT HE DID TO HIS DAD.
Lestat + Claudia: Patricide & The Cycles of Violence - INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE (2022) - Catherine Lacy, "Cut" (2019) / Anne Rice, "The Vampire Lestat" (1985) / Anne Rice, "Interview with the Vampire" (1976)
#iwtv#interview with the vampire#the vampire chronicles#lestat de lioncourt#claudia iwtv#claudia eparvier#claudia de pointe du lac#claudia de lioncourt#web weaving#i know there are 14929825 lestat/claudia comparative posts but i needed this one. for me.#does this make any sense outside of my head#like it's the cycles of violence and abuse and control (obviously)#but also lestat fantasizing/dreaming about killing his dad but not being able to in the end#she did something he always wanted to but never could and he respected her for it. he didn't have it in him but she DID#the lesdaughter of it all#also can we talk about how they both made louis finish the job agahajaj#evil of my evil
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Hey guys, can I be honest? I donât much care for the lesbians from Willow (2022)
#itâs kit#I donât like kit#like I like her as a bratty character in regards to Elora#that makes total sense she always felt inferior than Elora because there was a prophecy blah blah blah#and her need to know about her dad makes sense#but her DRAMA WITH JADE IS PETULANT ANNOYING AND UNREMARKABLE#I like the idea of Jade having this struggle as a knight vs as a partner to kit#I like that#but the drama between them is so fucking annoying#stop being petty with her just because she wants to help save the god damn world!!!!!!!!!#also hot take Jade shouldâve been Elora Danan#I said what I said#anyways Iâm only 4 episodes in but ugh#I wanted to see what people were talking about in the tag and it was all gifs of Jade and Kit#and itâs awesome itâs so cool that they made the lesbian princess and her knight canon with so much casualness#but I donât like the ship#Iâm much more invested in Graydon and Elora tbh#and thatâs not because I like the straights#I like the start of their understanding and chemistry#Iâm not about petulant tension for the sake of tension#Willow#Willow 2022
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Giving a complicated tragic childhood backstory to your favorite character is all fun and games, until you realize you need to account for how old all the other adult characters would have been at the time and realize that scenes that would work perfectly if one character was twenty three and the other was fourteen stop working when you need other characters who are played by adult actors clearly younger than they are to be in college at the same time so your story beats line up thematically.
#Don't worry. I made an excel document for this over a year ago#Was that unhinged? Yeah. But this is harder than you think it is#In unrelated news it is now reasonable to have a child in your 20s 30s or 40s depending on when the plot needs the child#Also people in their early 20s can be in grad school have already established careers and adopt children now. I've declared it.#Also: Hollywood stop trying to trick me into believing women in their 30s are the same age as men in their 50s. It's never gonna work.#I'm fighting for my life to make these age gaps normal even on a platonic level#Don't worry I aged the girls up and the boys down#But still this is a bit ridiculous#If you use the actors' ages it doesn't work. Garrison's actress is 16 years younger than Curtain. Why?#I mean I like the casting. But SQ is a teenager. We know Curtain has had his evil plans at least since SQ was born and lost his bio dad#and if the Whisperer is Garrison's invention that means she and Curtain were working together when SQ was born#If SQ in the show is 16 (the actor was older I believe) and Garrison is 37 (that's how old the actress is now she was younger at time)#That means Garrison was only 21 and Curtain was well into his 30s. And that's after you age SQ down and Garrison up for the calculations#So Garrison was likely (according to the shows' casting) even younger than that which begs the question what was Curtain doing?#Was he spending his 30s lurking around college campuses and high schools looking for a kid whose inventions he could steal?#What in the Marcus Cutter is that about?#All these jokes about Garrison being SQ's uninvolved divorced stepmom but nah she's really his estranged big sister#also this is very frustrating because the irl age gap between the actress who plays Number Two and Tony Hale only 7 years#but they're the ones for whom a 16 year age gap would have actually made sense because he adopts her in the books!#but now since Garrison is clearly so much younger than Number Two Curtain and Benedict I have to deal with this#(Don't worry I figured it out and made the age gaps normal. You just now have to believe Number Two is only a year older than Garrison)#It was the stress of living with her family that aged her and Garrison just looks naturally super young that's what we're going with.#And don't get me wrong:#I do like the actresses and actors they casted they're great but sometimes I google the ages and I'm like oh you cannot be serious#But we've (more or less) figured it out#Rant over#writing#writing struggles#tmbs
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Thank you so much for going through the effort to even get screenshots! Itâs seriously appreciated.
You make a good point, not least of which because this circle looks like a blast zone that came from within. It even pushed other bodies away. Iâve never seen Kindred gameplay, idk what their protective powers look like, but generally spells that are cast on you by someone else use the caster as the center of the spell, not the target. (Basically, the blast circle wouldnât have been centered on Ambessa, but on the Wolf.)
The protected area around Mel and Jayce when they wake up doesnât look like a blast zone the way it did with Ambessa (other than, you know, the Actual Bomb), so Iâm not sure what to make of that.
I did not know that Ambessa had a bio already, let alone that included stuff from her music video! I thought she just had her blurb. Itâs great that they clarified who she was pregnant with eventually. Uh, whereâs Kino while sheâs out at war then??? I imagine that Kinoâs father was probably also a soldier and in the army too. Hopefully Kino was with relatives or family friends.
Also, Rokrund! Itâs nice to get a name for the specific region Ambessa is from other than just the wider nation of Noxus. Is this a new name weâre hearing or has it appeared in any other League lore/media before?
âVisions that she would speak of to few others.â I wonder who those few are. Given how she treats her children, I cannot trust that even her kids are among these few. Their dad, maybe? I hesitate to say âAmbessaâs husbandâ because she definitely does not act like she has a husband, or maybe heâs deceased.
I plead the fifth on the Solari stuff because I know jack shit about the Solari, and if it turns out that Mel does have Solari magic, I do want to be surprised by their lore.
It still puzzles me why, if she does have magic, she wouldnât use it to defend herself. You mentioned it being linked to situations with certain death. Iâm iffy on this because it feels convoluted and kind of like a cop-out if that really is the reason canât use it at will. If it is the case, though, then maybe Viktor wasnât hurt because his magic clashed with hers, but because his death wasnât guaranteed. I rewatched the opening scene, and he was still moving a little when Jayce performed Hexcore magic on him. If his death wasnât certain, then the magic had no need to save him.
More likely, Melâs magic has a cooldown and a long period where she needs to build enough magic back up to be able to use, but most likely, Mel doesnât even know she has magic. Thereâs no sense in concealing her magic now, especially not after it saved herself and Jayce. Sure, itâd be a bad idea to come out about it to the world even after Piltover accepted Hextech since it wouldâve been a secret for so long. However, I do believe she wouldâve told Jayce. If not before, then definitely after it saved the two of them and Viktor still almost died.
Jayce needs as much information as he can get to figure out whatâs going on with Viktor. Mel cares a lot about Jayce and seems to also care for Viktor even if she disagreed with him last season. She also has the same innate curiosity that Jayce and Viktor do. Sheâd want him to be able to solve this puzzle with all the information at his disposal and has been able to open up to him in the past with the trust that he would not share her secrets. Sheâd tell him so that they could figure out why her magic didnât work as it was supposed to.
Unless thereâs a reason we havenât been told for why she needs to keep this hidden? If you squint your ears real hard, her line of âThereâs no sense to these things, Jayceâ in response to âHow does the explosion do that to him and I just walk out without a scratchâ sounds a bit like sheâs trying to get him to drop the subject. After all, there is sense to these things for a scientist. Thereâs physics and calculations that go into why every single piece of debris falls in the way that it does. Which direction it flies in, how much heat is dispersed, the shock absorption in everything and every person in the blast radius, how far each person gets pushed across the room. To Jayce, âthereâs no senseâ might not be a comforting thing to hear. So was Mel just trying and failing to comfort him or was she attempting to change the subject? Or am I just reading too much into it?
Lmao imagine tho if Jayce found out she has magic, whether she already knew or not. Heâd want to study her! And honestly sheâd probably be down for it to find out even more ways to use her powers, maybe a way to replicate it with Hextech so more people can have a way to stay safe! That would actually be a good way to use Hextech to help people. And maybe Mel just has a scientist kink, who knows
Mel's protection should have saved Viktor too, and she's trying to figure out why it didn't
S2 ep1 shows a circle of protected stone where Mel and Jayce were during the explosion. My theory is that Mel's magic armor activated and saved them both. It seems like it casts a sphere of protection around wherever Mel is.
The center of this circle is not Mel's seat - it's Jayce's. She ran to Jayce to save him.
No other Councilors were in range of Mel's protection, so they all got hurt or killed.
But Viktor was, Jayce's words, "right next to" him. He was easily within Mel's circle of protection.
1) Viktor tried to run and mistakenly left the circle of protection. But are we meant to believe that Viktor, close to dying already and using a crutch, would have outrun Mel?
2) Viktor's augmented body clashes with Mel's
Why does Mel try to touch Viktor in episode 1? It seems like a throwaway moment, but not even Jayce touches him in this scene. So why Mel?
She's curious. And possibly, feeling responsible. She's wondering why her protection didn't work.
Is this Hexcore brand of the Arcane trying to reach out to Mel? Or trying to defend itself from her?
Mel was trying to protect both Jayce and Viktor, which is reflected in how she holds Jayce as well as Viktor's cane when she promises to protect Hextech:
But if, for example, Mel's magic is Solari in origin, and Viktor's is from the Void - or the Arcane equivalent of similar opposing forces - then it's possible that their magic rejects or hurts one another. So Mel's circle of protection either rejected Viktor, or was what hurt Viktor, and not the explosion.
#I did not intend my reply to be this long sorry#arcane speculation#arcane#mel medarda#ambessa medarda#mel and ambessa#jayce talis#viktor#viktor arcane#meljay#meljayvik#league of legends
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I'm so sorry y'all, maybe I missed something, some type of scene, something somewhere but I have no fucking clue how you can get lucyXcooper out of this show.
I truly don't gaf about rarepairs or enemies to lovers or shipping just cause you like how they look together or just cause it's fucked up but like genuinely saying they had good romance chemistry (better then Lucy and max even???) Is genuinely mind boggling to me.
Ship what you want, just don't lie to me?
#you can admit the ship is weird#and doesnt make sense to most#it is okay#cooper came up#used her for bait#stole her to a organ harvester#and then at the end he was like#lets go find your dad i guess#i dont care about what you ship#if i do ill just fucking block you#but i need to know#where is the romance chemistry#im trying hard to find it#was it when she gave him he vials of anti feral ghoul?#when she gave him the anti feral ghoul because shes just fucking kind to everyone ever???#are you looking at me jn my eyes#and going by incel logic that being nice to a guy means your instantly in love and dating now????#was it when she was kind and nice because she grew up in a vault??? where she was raised to be nice to anyone????#fallout on prime#fallout prime#fallout show#fallout show spoilers
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"I relate to Bess a lot. I think that she is someone who is super quirky, I'm a very quirky person! Artist really struggles with feeling validationwith her art and they can be incredibly critical of themselves. And I think that Bess is someone that really cares about other people and I think I care a lot about people, too. Her temper is a little quick, for sure. And that was something that was exciting to play because normally, I try not to make anybody uncomfortable. So I think that was fun, to be a little more sharp and and to find that!" - Brittany on Bess(x)
#little voice#little voice apple tv#brittany o'grady#bess alice king#idc what anyone says i love her#and i wish i caught this while it was still on!#she just wants to take care of and protect everyone she cares about and her heart is so big yet she is unsure of what she wants and needs#i just wanna hug her#she's not perfect but my god she's trying#when she told elaine(?) that she's not gonna let louie get hurt i felt that#also her crying with king of the lost boys in the background bROKE me#i saw someone say that her singing voice is like mandy moore's and i definitely hear it#i'm glad she's surrounded by people who will fight for her and with her for her dreams and aspirations(benny priya louie her dad and samuel#because she also fights hard for the people she cares about#''bess the mess'' is sort of true but so is ''best alice QUEEN'' /hj#i guess by me saying that she's unsure of what she wants and it's that she's unsure if she's even worthy of a successful career#and that she's unsure if she's even worthy of her needs being put before other people's so she rejects those things because she's scared#honestly would've wanted louie and benny's roles expanded if we'd gotten a season 2 and we need to find out where dad is#cw: food#i honestly don't know if this'll make sense but her face looks like a cg disney princess's face... like the eye shape face shape and nose?#she's sooo pretty#actually relearning guitar and piano because of this show#i relate to her so much#it's ugly because it's in 720p rip
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SAY IT WITH ME:
FEMALE CHARACTERS CAN BE WARRIORS AND FEMININE
MALE CHARACTERS CAN BE SMART AND MASCULINE
BEING BOTH IS NOT A "FLAW" WHERE ONE NEEDS TO BE REMOVED
IT'S CALLED "COMPLEXITY"
#i won't tag it#but#HECK if i wanted to chuck episode 5 out my window and then run it over with a car#i mean these issues have definitely been hinted at before ep 5 but that one just went ALL IN#i knew from 3 and 4 what they would probably do with hakoda but GOSH am i bitter about it#i swear if they don't walk this back somehow and make hakoda a bad overbearing dad or whatever i'm gonna riot#and katara's whole 'you know i'm not good at this [womanly] type of stuff' NO SCREW YOU WHOEVER INCLUDED THAT#WHY#if you want a female character that rejects the stereotypes of femininity you'll get one in season 2 gosh DANG IT#you don't need to try and force katara into that role#sokka wanting to use his brain AND fight well is not a flaw#katara wanting to use her waterbending to fight AND knowing how to sew is not a flaw#OH i hate this#i hate this so much#i can understand the need to change story elements to work better in a different format#i don't think they're always doing that WELL but i can understand the need for it#but i will never understand why they felt the need to butcher characters' personalities#again some things won't transfer well i get it i really REALLY do#it's like with sanji in opla how he had to be toned down - that makes sense for a live action adaptation#just removing things simply for the sake of removing them? no just no#'updated for modern audiences' has become a curse to my ears i swear because it always means the same thing#'we're going to remove all complexity and make it as one note as possible so we don't offend anyone'#there was nothing wrong with katara or sokka or aang or anyone else that they needed 'updating' yall are just close-minded#ok rant over just REALLY needed to get that out...
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see I canât accept charlesâ comic background and socioeconomic status as canon for the show because if I did that would mean the whole group would be a bunch of rich kids and thatâs a horrifying concept
#ranging from vaguely upper class (niko and charles via comic logic) to presumably quite wealthy (edwin) to straight up ultrarich (crystal)#well off but doesnât own a mansion -> owns a mansion -> owns several mansions in several countries#but yeah that aside. I donât like the idea of him being raised upper class or even upper middle and yes I know he went to a private catholic#school that presumably costs a decent amount of money but for one we donât Know how much exactly by that point in time (Iâm assuming it was#more prestigious and expensive back in edwinâs day) and itâs not like middle class or even working class people can never afford#to send their one (1) kid to catholic school. like thatâs really not too unusual. I know this is an american example but im thinking about#lady bird and her catholic school situation- her family was financially unstable and still paid for Catholic school because it was (in their#opinion) the best offering for an education in the neighborhood (and as someone who lives in the same city in the same Area of the same#city I can tell you that that choice does make sense even for a non-catholic. the public schools round here can be uhhhhhh rough)#so im seeing charlesâ situation sorta like that#his dad seems like the type to want him âkept in lineâ and âwhipped into shapeâ and I think heâd pay for that if he could manage it#idk something about charles is justâŚâŚhe has an appeal by being the Normal Kid amongst them. not raised as anything special. not having all#his needs met. never expecting to do anything super grand with his life. just a city kid yknow#anyway SOMEONES gotta know how to cook. I donât think crystal or edwin have ever had to cook for themselves in their lives and niko seems to#live on instant ramen and i mean I bet she can cook very basic japanese meals but thatâs about it#please for the love of god tell me charles learned some stuff from his mom and can cook an adequate meal#I know ghosts donât eat but shut up#rambling#charles#dead boy detectives spoilers
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part of me wonders like. what if ruby's mom had just left. what if ruby had said "i'm named after a road", looking at her with so much hope in her eyes, and her mom, who made this choice nineteen years ago, couldn't handle it. and left.
#sorry i just keep thinking about that one sarah jane adventures episode with clyde's dad#where at the end. his dad doesn't magically become the person clyde needs him to be. he can't. he wasn't.#and he leaves again. and all clyde can say is 'don't do to another kid what you did to me.'#and he has a family. he has his mom and he has the bannerman road gang.#it's not that he doesn't need his dad because he does and did but he *can't* have his dad. not in the way he needs. because that version#of his dad doesn't exist.#so i just keep thinking. this whole season revolving around ruby wanting to find her mom. because maybe then she can make sense of it.#maybe she won't feel like she was left there because there's something Wrong with her#i keep thinking what if she'd looked at her mom and said 'it's me. you left me. please. i don't hate you. i was safe. i was loved. but it's#me. do you see me.'#i keep thinking what if her mom got overwhelmed and ran.#it's not malicious it's not intentional to hurt ruby. but ruby is a ghost of a mistake she hasn't faced for nineteen years.#how do you look at that. how do you.#what if she ran. and left ruby in that coffee shop. and the doctor warned her but she tried anyway.#thinks about ruby. shell-shocked because this Wasn't Supposed To Happen.#not because she thought it would go perfect but she thought there would be Something#and instead her mom left.#imagining ruby collapsing into the doctor's arms after that and just losing it. you know.#cathartic. to me.#ruby sunday
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i bring a sort of "gman isnt evil or a bad person" to the function that not many people agree with
#gman#hlvrai#even in canon games he isnt explicitly evil hes just a fucking asshole#hes just like a catty old man who likes to fuck around#but not actively harming or doing anything â evil â#and in hlvrai i dont believe in the bad/neglectful/abusive dad gman hcs my apolocheese...#tommy feigns ignorance about gman because ... his dad is a fucking interdimensional beaurocrat . not many people would have a normal#reaction to that information. not because tommy doesnt know who or what his dad is#i think they have a good relationship and theyre very close! tommy just likes to lie sometimes#i just think we need more accurate / nicer portrayals of gman maybe#its why tommys stories and reasons for his orphaned childhood dont make sense his dad is just a guy who isnt ânormalâ we love that for her#sorry for the influx of gman takes somethings happening to me
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Colt laughed, shaking his head as Jen rattled on, clearly enjoying herself as she poked fun at their older brother. âOh, I can already picture that revolving door,â he said, smirking at the thought of Jaseâs expression. âBig bro could never live down a revolving door, especially not with Dad hovering over him, throwing in the classic disappointed dad look.â
He watched her, sensing the shift in her tone as she talked about things from their pastâstuff that still lingered but stayed under wraps for now. Colt gave a slight nod, a silent promise to take it all in stride and wait until she was ready to share. âYeah, no need to get into it now. Whatever went down, weâll get there when we get there. Iâm not going anywhere.â He shot her a warm look before turning back to the pizza, breaking the seriousness with a mouthful of food. âBesides, this pizzaâs way too good for heavy talk.â
The mention of holiday chaos made him grin. âWell, bring on the little Bartons and the Wilsonsâsounds like a recipe for a wild Thanksgiving to me,â he chuckled. âIf itâs peace youâre looking for, you might have to wait a bit longer, but if itâs family, yeah... sounds like youâve got all the bases covered.â
When she started scheming about match-making, Colt rolled his eyes with a laugh. âOh no, donât start with that look. I know that look.â He shook his head, a smirk creeping onto his face as he stretched back. âIâm sure thereâs someone out there who could keep up, but letâs not throw me to the wolves just yet. Iâll deal with the knife-throwing and poisoned dinners first, thanks,â he teased, nudging her back. âBut hey, if Yelenaâs got a crush, maybe Iâm safe from her target practice for a while. Small mercies, right?â
"Bully, great another one." Jen continued teasing, eyes narrowing at the nudge as she continued to eat her pizza, pretending to watch the movie that was essentially just background noise at this point. "Jase is just extremely protective, I think it's his oldest sibling complex."
"There was a time where I offered to replace his door with one of those revolving ones." Jenna laughed, remembering the glare she got at the suggestion, didn't help that it was in front of their father who was then concerned at what Jason was doing. "I don't think he is anymore, at least not with people from that side. Less sexual harassment paperwork has been filled out." She chuckled, it had only happened once but she'd never let him live it down. He had been the one reporting someone.
"Things that were taken out after shit happened." She didn't want to speak about it, not over pizza but she would tell him eventually. "You don't need to make up for anything I'm just glad you weren't around for that... It wasn't a good time and Dad never forgave himself for it but... I'll explain another time." She huffed, shoving more pizza in her mouth to stop the talking.
"I just wanted family for the longest time, Like a proper family that did things together and celebrated the holidays and I got that now." She shrugged, feeling a warmth filling her as she thought of all the family she had now. "I don't know if peace is the right word, I mean the kids are grown but theres three little Bartons around and if Sam and Sarah come, theres two more." she shook her head with a smile.
"Yup, Yelena has a bit of a crush but Kate doesn't work like that. More platonic best friends that were enemies I guess." Jenna chuckled, remembering how excited Yelena was to introduce her to Kate when they decided to be friends. "Kate probably would, maybe even Carol but she'd off world at the moment... hmm I wonder who else is single and will be there.." She teased, already playing match maker in her mind.
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>Laughs Out Loud
I thought that piece was just about people focusing too hard on labelling Mizuki instead of letting them be themselves like they ask, not that it was transphobia ._ .
its ok to have ur own interpretation of that piece but its very clear to me that that wasnt ame's intention
#also i dont think its bad At All for ppl to 'focus too hard on labeling mizuki' is it bad that trans ppl are celebrating rep#if u find it annoying maybe distance urself from the fandom honestly. its So Ok i did it too after the debacle with the facts acc lol.#its so normal and common for queer ppl to be A little annoying about queer characters dude theres been so little rep for such a long time#ppl just end up feeling overprotective over the character bc they dont see their experiences reflected in media as often#its just so sucky to me to scold ppl over being happy and expressing their queerness#what is focusing too hard anyways? the argument just reeks of how cishets get annoyed at anyone openly queer for 'shoving it in their face'#and ame liking a post calling mizuki a he + her response to the backlash makes me think her threshold for 'too much' is way lower than mine#talking#mizuki5#asks#work with me here why do you think ame has to 'forbid herself from thinking about mizukis identity'#edit also how do labels stop mizuki from being herself like yeah labels can be limiting but as far as we know mizuki is a femenine tgirl#i dont think she'd find it limiting shes just scared atm to be openly trans around ppl she cares about in fear of being treated differently#in fact i think itd be super sweet if we eventually got an event where mizuki connects with other trans ppl and finds a sense of solidarity#with ppl who mirror her own experiences with gender#niigo going to a pride parade.. mfy finding strength in knowing theres other ppl out there that defy their family to be themselves..#i think knd would know the least abt queer ppl bc shes been so Composingbrain but eager to understand to make songs that can save ppl..#like how her dad told her she needs to be more worldly to make good songs#ena i think would know what the average person knows but sososo glad to see mizuki happy and comfy
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household enemy to the yyh watchthrough number one is the olympics. it's taken us a week to get two episodes into the gamemaster fight
#out of three. please the third episode's what makes it okay im fighting for my life out here#it is NOT for lack of trying on my part but theres only a brief window of time when the olympics is not happening#and as it turns out the watchthrough is Not my mom's first priority (how dare she etc)#i do feel slightly bitter that we've gotten through two eps of band o brothers in the same time#we are fighting for the same timeslots yet somehow the hour long show's gotten a leg up??#you don't have time for a 23 min ep but DO for a 60 min one?? explain the math to me please#idk how to explain the vague feeling of betrayal bc it Does Not make sense Nor matter in the slightest#but cmonnnn we were doing so well. and my little bro's starting up school again soon and my dad's gotta go back to work#sometimes eventually (<- hes on medical leave) and my grandparents are coming over next week We're Losing Time Soon#ughhh if i'd known the olympics were happening (<- somehow completely oblivious to this) i'd have accounted for#my mom getting whisked away by the land of synchronized divers and shot putters and whatever the hell#happens in the summer olympics (<- only pays attention to winter olys)#bc that always happens. and *i* have to go back to school in Some Amount Of Time Im Too Scared To Check (p sure it's late aug though) and#when that happens i'll (hopefully) be stuck across town which means we won't be able to do it any time besides the weekends#and i don't wannaaaaa#i know this is the least important problem anyone's ever had like i get that i know but#it's important to me that they sit down and watch this with me. and watching it pull apart and being#the one who's easily the most invested it makes me look all desperate when i ask them for their time and they can't give it#we can only pull this off neatly in the summer and we were so close and now we're losing it right at the finish line#i don't want life to get in the way of this little bubble i've fought so hard to make y'know#and it's childish and embarrassing and whatever but i just want them to have fun with me with this thing i care about a lot#but i can't do that bc my mom needs to watch the judo matches at Every weight class#even though she's recording a lot of them? i don't understand but whatever i know it's her thing im just moping about it ig#i want it to be as perfect an experience for them as possible and it's slipping away from me#and i don't wanna leave this project unfinished when i start school y'know. sighh#i think they might feel like i only want them around when we're watching stuff. whcih is weird bc that's like#The Singular Way we family bonded literally my whole life so idk why they wouldn't get that when reversed#but either way that IS how i wanna spend time with them. i want them to understand this thing that's become a part of me#and i wanna talk With them about it. and so far it's been fun in a way it's never been before. my mom at least seems to really like it#and i want it to Keep going well bc if we lose momentum im worried they'll start finding it tedious. sighh
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the thing about Aelwyn that I think about a lot is that there's a lot to the notion that she, to a certain extent, was so abrasive with Adaine because of how obstinate Adaine is with their parents. If you have based a chunk of your personality on the precept of "The only way to protect myself is to meet my parents' expectations and obey them at all costs", then every time Adaine pushes back against them, there is almost unquestionably a fear-response -- even if you aren't the one who set your parent off, their stress/frustration can fill a room to the point of becoming smothering anyway. And if you don't feel safe getting mad at your parents for being a source of stress/fear in your life, then invariably the only thing you can do is begin to resent the third-party who you perceive as setting them off for no reason instead of playing it safe, like you do.
#N posts stuff#NOT saying this in a 'oh poor aelwyn; adaine's such a Problematic Asshole' way lmfao -- that wouldn't make Any sense#but just sort of in an idle 'what Were Aelwyn's motivations and reasonings for her role in things?' musing#i think that Aelwyn was like. to an Extent was kind of drinking the kool-aid in a way that only really got destabilized after being torture#of like 'Adaine is treated badly bc she behaves badly. i am a good daughter so my parents treat me better' being completely shaken#when Aelwyn has been completely destroyed by torture - even if she doesn't remember the mental effects she's still Physically#affected - and her parents continue to push her and refuse to allow her to rest and blatantly could Not care less about her health#and that triggering an 'Oh. I wasn't Earning any real love/respect; I'm just an easier Tool to use than Adaine is' realization#but Brennan does also make it clear that Aelwyn was Afraid of their parents in a way that I'm not sure Adaine was#which is interesting to think about. Adaine blatantly Dislikes their parents and knows that she's being mistreated and resents that#but with how freely she talks back to them - I don't think they Scare her? at least up until her dad makes more overt attempts to harm her#and even then she seems to shift into 'well I just need to Defeat them then' mentality instead of a 'that's Scary' kind of feeling#i DO NOT think that Adaine is like. better off or better adjusted or anything; i think she's just dysfunctional in a different way#anyway i am just interested in the notion that Adaine and Aelwyn both kind of saw each other as 'Aggressor' and resented each other for it#until Aelwyn was able to have that final realization about the like. full-scope of their parents' cruelty and like.#was able to sever that cycle enough to See Adaine fully and allowed them to reach out to one another finally
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