#and he can’t tell Finn?? imagine y’all please.

[dismas-n-dismay]

And if I said Finn and Lasko should be twins would y’all jump me.

If I proposed we called it the Dewdrop Twins Au (because water and dewdrop flowers) would y’all see the vision or nah

[heyitssmiller]

Frosted Windowpanes Part Two

I have no idea why this was so hard to write? Part one just came so easily and this... not so much. But here it is! All the holiday tropes! Christmas puns (thank you to all of y’all who gave me ideas for those)! Falling in love!

As always, @donttouchmycarrots is my hero for proofreading!! Love you <3

@lumosinlove Guess who’s back to borrow your characters ;) Thank you so much!!

Part One if you missed it!

.

Finn had a Plan.

Well, half a Plan.

Maybe.

Step one: meet up with Logan and Leo again. Step two: woo them. Step three: …

Well, it wasn’t much. And it was very vague. But Finn’s plans tended to never go the way he wanted them to anyway, so vague was usually for the best. And so far, it had been going well. They’d grabbed dinner several times, ran into each other at the store or buying Christmas presents downtown. And on Monday the diner was closed, so Finn and Leo spent hours at the farm helping where they could and pestering Logan. He was so fun to tease – he got all gruff and grumpy and adorable. Leo seemed to think so, too, if the number of times he teamed up with Finn to make Logan get all red was anything to go off of.

At the beginning of all this, Finn had thought he’d been overdramatic. He’d woken up the morning after first meeting Logan and Leo and assumed he’d been tired and jet-lagged and was imagining all those feelings he’d felt the night before.

And then he’d met up with them again.

Love at first sight wasn’t real. Finn knew this. But being here, meeting Logan and Leo, just might have been enough to change his mind. It made no sense, but – well, here he was. The past few days were happy, rose-tinted, and Finn couldn’t believe his luck. What were the odds that he’d find both of them in this sleepy little town?

So here he was, pulling into the parking lot of Leo’s for a cup of coffee and a healthy serving of sweet southern blond.

Leo was out front, shoveling snow and looking absolutely miserable while doing it. He was bundled in a thick coat and hat, scarf wrapped high around his neck. Finn laughed under his breath as he turned his car off and braved the cold. Poor southern boy. Leo glanced up at him briefly when he approached, then did a double take.

“Morning, sunshine.” Finn said with a cheeky grin. “Enjoying the snow day?”

Leo’s resulting grumpy look made Finn laugh. “I’ll take that as a no.”

“Nate called and said he can’t make it to work today because the roads are so bad.” Leo took a deep breath, and then the rest of his words came out in a jumbled, rushed mess. “Which isn’t his fault and I’m not blaming him at all. But I haven’t started cooking and we open in thirty minutes and there’s no coffee brewing and nowhere for people to park because of this goddamn snow and so I’m stuck shoveling snow instead of cooking and I’m so far behind-”

Finn gently pressed a finger to Leo’s lips, halting the nervous ramblings. Leo looked down at his finger, then back up to meet Finn’s eyes.

Oh, he was so gorgeous.

Finn had to force himself to focus on the matter at hand instead of cherry-red lips and soft baby blues. “Relax, ok? And hand me the shovel. I’ll do this, while you get on inside and start cooking.”

“But – Finn,” Leo said, and wow did he love the sound of his voice in that southern twang.

“Leo,” He echoed with an attempted accent, eliciting a smile from the blond.

“I can’t just ask you to work. You’re on vacation.”

“First of all, you didn’t ask – I offered. And the friends I’m visiting are both at work,” Finn explained, “so I’ve been left to my own devices for the day.”

Leo winced in sympathy. “Bless your heart.”

And see, Finn had done his research. He’d googled New Orleans, the state of Louisiana, and the south in general. And he’d learned that southerners were very confusing – more confusing than people gave them credit for. They were polite and kind to everyone, even if they definitely didn’t mean it. The phrase “bless your heart” could mean they either absolutely adored you or they thought you were the worst person on the planet.

Finn really hoped it wasn’t the latter. He didn’t think it was the latter, anyways.

“I’m literally dying of boredom. I’ll shovel the snow, and then I can come help you cook!” At Leo’s skeptical look, Finn brought out the big guns: his puppy dog eyes. They were known to melt even the hardest of hearts. He’d learned this lesson in college when asking his Grinch of an Ethics professor for some extra credit. “Please?”

Leo hesitated, but Finn could see the exact moment he caved. “Alright. But you’re getting paid.”

“Absolutely not. Consider it a Christmas gift.”

“I’ll pay you in food and coffee.”

“Deal.” Finn said, grabbing the shovel from Leo’s mittened hands. “Like I could ever say no to your food.”

Leo’ smile, warm and a little bashful, probably could’ve thawed the snow on the pavement if it was directed that way. “What would you like: sweet or savory?”

“Sweet,” Finn said instantly, even though he really preferred savory. His one-track mind was still stuck on dimples. “But I take my coffee black.”

“Comin’ right up.”

Finn watched him go, knowing that he had the dopiest smile on his face. Today was going to be a good day. And he knew a way to make it even better.

Finn dialed the number for Tremblay’s Trees, hoping more than anything that Logan would be the one to pick up. But of course he wasn’t that lucky. A bright, cheery voice answered the phone - definitely not Logan. “Tremblay’s Trees!0 This is Thomas, how can I help you?”

“Uh,” Finn said articulately, “Hi, I’d like to talk to Logan. Is he there?”

There was a slight pause, then: “Maybe. Who’s asking? And how do you know our dear Lolo?” The voice sounded curious, if not a little mischievous. Before Finn could answer, though, there was a scuffling over the line.

“Talker, give me the phone.”

“Oh, come on, I’ve got the five o’clock news slot tonight. Give the people what they want, Logan! Who’s your mystery caller?”

“I swear to god-”

The scuffling sound got louder, then there was a loud clatter when Finn assumed the phone hit the ground. He jerked his own phone away from his ear with a wince. “I am very confused.” He stated, not sure if anyone else heard him.

There was a small, softer rustle, then a breathless voice asked, “Hello?”

Finn couldn’t help but smile. “Hi, Lolo.”

That laugh was just as wonderful over the phone as it was in person. “Please don’t call me that.”

“Mmm… I might need to be convinced.” Finn said, letting some flirtiness slip through. “Anyways, I’ve got an idea. You busy today?”

“I’ve got the morning off. Why, what did you have in mind?”

So Finn, with the phone pressed between his shoulder and his ear, told the story of this morning as he shoveled – Nate not being able to make it to his shift, the ice and snow in Leo’s parking lot, Leo being behind on cooking and acting anxious. “So I was thinking we could do something? Like a surprise? And I know you guys need to actually sell things and make a living and stuff but I was thinking about decorating the diner? He just works so hard and he’s so stressed and I feel like he could use a little holiday cheer. What do you think?”

The other voice from earlier must have shouted, because he was loud enough to hear over the phone. “Phone guy! What the hell did you say to make him melt like that?”

Logan punched Talker in the shoulder. Hard. “I will lock you in the closet, Talker. Shut. Up.” His attention was brought back to the phone by Finn’s laugh and his demeanor softened again. He’d never met someone as chaotically considerate as Finn O’Hara. It was such a sweet, thoughtful idea. And it was something to help out Leo? How could Logan say no?

“Sounds like a plan.” Logan said, cradling the phone closer to his ear. “Most people already have their decorations so we don’t have a whole lot left, but I’ll see what I can find.”

“Perfect! Oh this is going to be so fun – fuck, I’ve gotta go. Customers just showed up. But I’ll see you soon, yeah?”

“Yeah, I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“Great. Ok see you soon bye!” The words reached Logan in a rush before the line went dead.

What a dork.

Logan was pretty sure he was half in love with him.

“So…” Talker said suddenly, making Logan spin around quickly. “Who are you pining over?”

Noelle, who had been passing by on her way to the kitchen, backpedaled in order to join the conversation. “Are we talking about Logan’s love life? Because I’m so here for that.”

Logan sighed and went to the coat rack by the door, grabbing his coat, toque, and scarf. “I’m not having this conversation with you.”

They both promptly ignored him. Talker grinned at his fiancée, sensing trouble he could get into. “He’s become such a sap.”

Noelle snuggled up to Talker, turning her teasing gaze to her brother. “But if it’s who I’m thinking of, they have such good chemis-tree.”

“Did you guys practice this or something?”

“Hey man, don’t be so defensive.” Talker said, voice turning serious. “You know we’re all rooting for you.”

“I hate you both so much.”

“Aww, don’t be like that, Lolo.” Noelle sighed, giving him an over-the-top hug and obnoxious kisses to his cheek. “We’re just having some fun. Do you want us to stop needling you?”

“I’m having fun fir sure!” Talker shouted, then burst into raucous laughter, which stopped as abruptly as it started. “Wait. That wasn’t Leo on the phone. You've got eyes for someone other than him, now? Branching out a little, are we?"

“No.” Logan said instantly, then winced. Because his feelings for Leo definitely hadn’t changed. But then there was Finn… “Maybe. It’s complicated, ok?”

“The redhead that was hanging out with you and Leo on Monday?”

Logan felt his cheeks heat up but didn’t say anything. Monday had been the best, though. Showing the two of them the farm and how he did his job and watching their noses and cheeks turn adorable shades of pink from the cold. Even though he’d been there for a year, Leo still seemed in awe of all the snow. He clearly hated it, but Logan could tell he still found wonder and beauty in a clean blanket of undisturbed, freshly-fallen snow. Finn, even though he was clearly freezing too, kept cracking jokes the entire time, his voice muffled by his scarf. They’d walked and talked and learned more about each other among the saplings that would be full-grown and ready to be cut down by next season.

Yeah, Monday had been a great day.

And Logan was so screwed.

“Birch, please.” Noelle teased, then softened. “But really, Logan. Both of them were just as interested in you as they were in each other. You’ve got nothing to worry about, you just need to talk to them.”

He looked up from the buttons of his coat. “You think so?”

“Only one way to find out. What are you doing with them today?”

“We’re decorating the diner.” Logan pulled his hat on and looked over at his sister. “Do you think dad’ll be ok with me taking some garland and a wreath?”

Noelle scoffed. “With all the coffee and pastries you boy’s given us, I think he’s more than paid for it. Do you want company?”

“No.”

“Oh, come on,” Talker said, wiggling his eyebrows. “We’d make the perfect wingmen.”

“You did enough while I was on the phone, thanks.” Logan said, grabbing the keys from the counter. “Ok I’m headed out. See you later.”

Talker and Noelle sent a chorus of boos after him, only stopping when the door closed firmly behind him. He huffed out a laugh, shook his head, and headed towards the display counter to grab decorations. They were a little old since it was so close to Christmas day, but they’d have to do. Logan hesitated for a split second, then grabbed the Santa hat as well. They’d get a kick out of that. He threw the decorations in the back of the truck and took off down the road.

.

They actually worked really well together – Leo and Finn, that is. Finn dealt with customers while Leo made the food. They had a complex, intricate dance around the close quarters of the diner but they seemed to know the footwork already and could predict exactly what the other needed without blinking an eye. Leo peered out the kitchen window at Finn as he took orders at another table, laughing at something one of the women said. He was good at this. He was naturally outgoing and good with people, but he was also efficient and seemed to be able to keep track of twenty different things at once.

Leo frowned thoughtfully down at the grits on the stove. Logically, he shouldn’t like Finn. The redhead had appeared like a whirlwind and thrown everything off course. But then he went out of his way to be helpful and sweet and thoughtful even though it didn’t benefit him in any way. He had a big heart with a lot of love to give. And he gave it willingly to everyone, it seemed.

Don’t get him wrong, that was a good thing – it was a great thing. But it also made the past few days incredibly confusing. Was Finn treating Leo like everyone else, or did he want something more?

He definitely wanted something more with Logan, though. That much was obvious.

Leo just wasn’t sure how he fit into all of this.

Finn barging into the kitchen snapped Leo out of his thoughts. He looked up as Finn started looking around for something on the counters and shelves, tongue poking out in concentration. Leo couldn’t help but smile at the little detail.

“What are you looking for?” He asked, stepping away from the stove.

“The, um…” Finn said, trailing off as he continued to search, clearly distracted. “The spicy maple sauce for the chicken and waffles.”

“In the fridge.” Leo stated plainly, maneuvering around Finn to grab flour from the pantry, brushing against his back as he did so and trying to ignore how the simple touch heightened his awareness of the redhead. Finn threw open the fridge door, scanning the shelves.

“Where?”

“Second shelf from the bottom, on the right.”

A few seconds of silence, then: “Where?”

Leo laughed, dumping a cup of flour into a bowl and heading to the fridge. He peered over Finn’s shoulder, then reached around him with one long arm to grab the bowl of sauce. “Right in front of you, sweetheart.” He teased. Finn turned around so that he was facing Leo, a look that Leo had seen a lot in the past few days but still couldn’t identify on his face.

“Yeah,” was all he said, soft and a little strangled.

Leo looked away from those deep, brown eyes and down at the sauce. His heartrate picked up significantly. “Have you tried this yet?” At Finn’s shake of his head, Leo grabbed a spoon from a nearby drawer. “Figured I’d combine my roots with where I ended up, y’know? Tabasco, black pepper, maple syrup, and a few more secret ingredients.” He said with a wink, spooning some out and holding it out to Finn. “I’m pretty proud of it, if I do say so myself. Try it.”

Instead of grabbing the spoon from Leo, Finn just leaned forwards and tasted the sauce straight from the spoon in Leo’s hand. Leo’s breath hitched and his stomach swooped as Finn straightened again and met his eyes.

Oh, he could stare into those eyes forever. Eyes the same color of the coffee Finn had slid through the kitchen window about an hour ago with the words, “figured you could use some” before dashing off to clear another table. Leo had turned beet red, but grabbed the coffee and held it close before taking a sip.

Leo also hadn’t realized how close they were. The diner was small and the kitchen was cramped, but they definitely didn’t need to be standing this close. Not that Leo was complaining.

“Is it hot in here?” Finn murmured, gaze flitting from Leo’s eyes down to his lips and back again.

Leo seemed a little lost, too, leaning closer to the redhead without even realizing he was doing it. “Must be the sauce.”

It definitely wasn’t just the sauce.

The chime that alerted them to the front door opening startled both of them, forcing them to jerk away from each other and blush furiously.

“I, uh, I’m going to go check on that.” Finn said, still not looking away from Leo as he backed up.

“Ok.” Leo whispered, reaching back to grab the island behind him in an attempt to steady himself. Finn reluctantly tore his eyes away and disappeared from sight, leaving Leo reeling in the kitchen as he entered the dining area.

Finn’s mind was still back in the kitchen, wishing more than anything that he hadn’t been forced to step away. He’d never wanted to kiss someone senseless quite as much as he did right then. And how was he supposed to keep it together when all he wanted to do was flip the diner sign from open to closed and get Logan here and finally talk to them. They’d felt this pull - this magnetism - too. He knew they did. The only thing left to do was finally talk about it. 

Finn was forced to snap back to the present when the counter was suddenly covered in green needles, red berries, and festive ribbons. He looked up to see Logan grinning at him. Under his coat he was wearing red plaid, which matched the Santa hat perched on his head.

How was it possible to want two people so much at the same time? He couldn’t breathe with all the emotions overflowing in his chest.

“Ho ho ho,” Logan attempted to say, but cracked up before he could finish. Finn grinned and laughed as well, stepping forward to greet him.

“You should’ve used the chimney.” Finn joked, tugging on the end of his hat playfully. He got a smile and sparkling green eyes in return. Finn bit back a dreamy sigh. “But really, thank you. Leo’s gonna love this.”

Logan’s face grew a little worried. “How is he?”

Ha.

Haha.

That was a good question, since Finn left him standing there in the kitchen with the spoon still in his hand, looking a little lost.

He ended up shrugging, glancing back at the kitchen door longingly. “Better now. Still seems tired.”

“We’re going to have to force him to take breaks, aren’t we.” It wasn’t a question.

“Probably. If we tag team, I think we can manage to make it happen.” Finn looked down at the decorations. “So where are we putting these?”

Logan looked around the dining area, giving Finn a perfect view of his profile. He longed to kiss that strong jawline so badly, holy shit. “We could hang some over the kitchen window and some around the front window. And the wreath can go on the door.” Finn followed Logan as he maneuvered his way around tables to the front window, eyeing it critically. “The frame is wide enough that it should stay up on its own, so we won’t need nails or anything.” He grabbed the garland from the counter and then turned back around. Finn looked from him to the tall crown molding around the window.

“Need a ladder?”

“No.”

Finn laughed, grabbing one end of the garland and stretching up to place it on the ledge. Once it was secure, he looked over his shoulder at Logan and stuck his hand out for the other end. Logan hesitated, clearly wanting to do it himself, but quickly admitted defeat and handed it over. He huffed at Finn’s smug smile.

“Shut up.”

Finn laughed as he hung the garland. Logan was so small and grumpy and cute. Finn wanted to bundle him up in his arms and never let go. His little pocket-sized lumberjack. How adorable. He was so different from Leo, in basically every way. And yet Finn still wanted them both. How the hell did that work? 

“I should probably check on the customers.” Finn said reluctantly, glancing around at the breakfast crowd. “Do you think you can manage the kitchen window?”

“I got it.” Logan grumbled, sizing up his next target. Finn just shook his head fondly and started making his rounds to the occupied tables. Logan grabbed the remaining garland and headed behind the counter. He couldn’t help but stick his head through the window and look around. It was several degrees warmer in the kitchen than it was in the dining area. Logan was surprised at how tidy it was, considering how hectic the morning had been. There were a few scattered dishes in the sink, but the counters were mostly clean and organized, each bowl seemed to have a designated location. Leo, focused with his head down, maneuvered between stations with an effortless grace as he breaded a chicken tender and threw it into a frier. Logan never thought he’d be so entranced by something as simple as cooking but here he was, watching Leo hum along to the Christmas music on the radio as he poured batter into a waffle iron. He grabbed a mug of coffee off to the side and looked up as he took a sip, jumping when he saw Logan.

“Logan! Hey, honey!” He smiled, like seeing Logan was the highlight of his day. Logan yearned at the sight of that smile. He seemed to be doing a whole lot of yearning lately. “When did you get here?”

“Just a few minutes ago. Brought you something.”

Leo arched an eyebrow. “That sounds a little ominous.”

“No,” Logan laughed. “No, it’s a good thing.” He held up the garland and wiggled it around a little, causing it to sway in the air.

Leo’s entire face lit up. “Christmas decorations?”

“It was Finn’s idea.” Logan said, looking back over his shoulder at the redhead. Leo visibly softened, smile gentle and eyes warm.

“He sure is sweet, isn’t he?”

You just need to talk to them, Noelle’s voice echoed in Logan’s head. Looking at Leo right then, he couldn’t help but think that maybe she was right.

.

“Sure is snowing hard out there, eh?” Logan asked several hours later as he looked out the window. It was a strange lull in the day – too late for lunch, but too early for dinner. They were all grateful for the break. Logan honestly wasn’t sure how Leo did this every day – it was exhausting.

Finn, who was sitting on the other side of the booth from Logan and Leo with his legs stretched out, pulled up the weather app on his phone. “It’s only supposed to get worse. They’re calling for a blizzard.”

Leo looked out at the snow worriedly. “I really don’t wanna drive home in all that.”

“Might need to close up early, then. No one’s going to be out in this weather, anyways.” Logan said, watching Leo bite his lip as he thought about it. “I could drive you, if you want.”

Leo looked over at him, relief clear in his eyes. “Would you?” He rushed to continue, “I don’t wanna inconvenience you or anything, and I know you need to get home too-”

“Leo,” Logan cut in with a smile. If Leo didn’t know Logan would do pretty much anything for him at this point, he was clearly oblivious. “I don’t mind, I promise.”

Leo seemed to accept it without further argument and looked over at Finn. “Do you wanna tag along? I was thinking about making cookies.”

“Well that depends.” Finn said with mock gravitas, leaning forward to rest his forearms against the table. “What kind of cookies are we talking?”

Leo matched his pose, mischief alight in his eyes. “I was thinking snickerdoodles, but I’d be willing to reconsider.”

“Sneak in some sugar cookies we can decorate and you’ve got yourself a deal.”

Leo and Finn shook on it, keeping it professional.

Logan was infatuated with the two of them.

“So you’re closing early?” He asked, excited at the prospect of spending the rest of the day with them. At Leo’s nod, he nearly sighed with relief. “Good. You need a break.”

Leo rolled his eyes, but smiled all the same. “Maybe I do.”

Finn grinned. “He finally admits it!”

“Ok, ok, I get it.” Leo sighed, shoving Logan’s shoulder repeatedly until he got out of the booth. Leo followed after him. “I’ve got to put stuff away in the kitchen and then I’ll be done.”

Logan and Finn shared a look before trailing after him. They worked together to clean up, put food away, and organize the receipts and cash register for the day. It went much faster with three people. Before they knew it, all three of them were piling into Logan’s pickup truck, bundled up against the cold and brushing freshly-fallen snowflakes off of their coats and out of their hair. Logan pulled out onto the road, driving while Leo gave directions from the passenger’s seat.

Leo’s house was nice – small, but it looked warm and well-loved. There was a snowman out front, complete with a scarf and carrot nose.

“Cute.” Finn said as they got out of the truck, walking up to the snowman. Leo smiled, fishing his keys out of his pocket.

“My friend’s little brother made that over the weekend.” He unlocked the front door and ushered everyone inside as he held the door for them. Leo’s house was all cool tones – soft blue and purples and greens. There was a tree in the corner of the living room by the window, all lit up and decorated. There were presents under the tree, wrapped in brown paper with ribbons and bows.

Leo hung his coat on the coat rack and took Logan’s and Finn’s from them. “So. Cookies?”

“Nope,” Logan said, grabbing Leo by the hand and tugging him towards the living room. “Rest first, then cookies.” Leo laughed, reaching behind him to find Finn’s arm and pulling him along with them.

“I won’t say no to a Christmas movie.” He agreed as they all collapsed onto the couch. Finn grabbed a blanket from the arm of the couch and threw it over the three of them while Leo grabbed the TV remote.

Logan moved closer under the pretense of getting under more of the blanket. He was now pressed up against Leo, butterflies in his stomach. “My vote is for Die Hard.”

Finn scoffed, throwing his legs over Leo’s and Logan’s thighs. “That doesn’t count as a Christmas movie.”

“I beg your pardon-”

“Is it about Christmas? No. Case closed.”

Logan leaned forward to look around Leo at the redhead. “It takes place during Christmas!”

Leo just listened amusedly to the bickering as he flicked through movie titles. They were still arguing when he started the cute, old Claymation Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer. Both boys trailed off as the introduction music started.

“This works.” Finn said, settling in to get more comfortable, his calves flexing against Logan’s thighs as he stretched. Logan hummed in agreement, eyes already glued on the screen.

They hadn’t even met Hermey the elf before Leo was sound asleep, head pillowed on Finn’s shoulder and breathing slow and even. Finn looked over blond curls at Logan and smiled, making his heart thud painfully in his chest. He needed to talk to them, and soon. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could sit there and keep all these feelings internalized.

But it could wait until after a nap. He snuggled up close and turned back to the TV.

.

“No, you need to-” Leo stopped and laughed, pointing to the recipe. “Teaspoon of vanilla extract, darlin’, not tablespoon.”

Finn switched out one measuring spoon for another with a wince. “That would’ve been bad, huh?”

“Very bad.” Leo agreed, looking over at the oven to see Logan already staring back at them, a wide, almost-giddy smile on his face as he started loading cookie dough balls onto a baking tray. One tray of snickerdoodles were already in the oven and spreading out rapidly as they cooked.

“We might’ve put those too close to each other,” Logan said, crouching down to look into the oven. “They’re all starting to stick together. It’s just one big, square cookie.”

“That’s ok. It’ll still taste good.” Leo said with a shrug. They both turned when Finn started banging on the table in time to the music.

“I don’t want a lot for Christmas! There is just one thing I need!” He screamed, bopping along to the song. Logan laughed and let himself be tugged forwards to dance. Leo watched as they both jumped around and danced in the kitchen, hips swaying and acting like total dorks. But they were so happy, as well. Big smiles graced their faces as they laughed and sang and held each other close. Leo whisked wet ingredients together in a bowl and leaned back against the counter as he enjoyed the over-the-top show. They were cute together in the warm glow of the kitchen – a sharp contrast to the snow falling outside and collecting on the windowsill. Finn tilted his head back to shriek the last high note, causing Logan and Leo to both burst into fits of laughter.

“O’Hara, please don’t audition for Broadway.” Logan teased, still laughing a little. Finn scowled and grabbed a tea towel, spinning it up before whipping it at the brunet.

This started an all-out war. Many a cookie lost their life in the crossfire when Logan accidentally hit Leo’s arm as he was transferring cooled cookies into a tin. They had a warrior’s send-off as they were dumped into the trash can.

After the cookies were baked and decorated and the kitchen was cleaned thoroughly, it was pitch black outside. Leo had genuinely lost track of time, but he was selfishly grateful for it. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for y’all to be driving in this weather in the dark.” He said, snagging a cookie from one of the plates and taking a bite as he tried to be casual about the two boys potentially staying the night. “I’ve got a guest bedroom and a pull-out couch if you wanna stay here.”

Finn and Logan looked at each other, then Logan shrugged. “If that’s ok with you.”

Ok? It was wonderful.

“Of course it is. I’ll go make up the beds and get y’all something to sleep in, ok?” Leo said before hurrying to his room, where he hastily made his bed and rummaged through his dresser for clothes. He muttered to himself as he pulled out two pairs of sweatpants. “Don’t make a big deal of this, Nutty. They’re just spending the night. That’s it.”

His mind fast-forwarded to imagine sleep-mussed hair, soft smiles, and rough morning voices. Sitting at the table together, nursing cups of coffee as the sun rose over a clean, white blanket of snow. They’d talk and laugh and just maybe share some coffee-flavored kisses.

Leo sighed, pressing his forehead against the edge of his dresser. “I’m screwed, ain’t I?”

.

Logan woke up to a gentle hand prodding his shoulder. He breathed in sharply as he remembered where he was and blinked his eyes open to be met with worried blue ones. “Leo?” He asked as he sat up, voice raspy with lack of use. “What’s wrong?”

He was greeted with an absolute onslaught of words. “There’s so much snow outside. Like, so much snow. I’ve never seen this much snow before. And I didn’t think it would be this bad so I don’t have any milk or bread or eggs in the house and I doubt I can get to the store. How long do you think the roads will be out? And what about the diner? Is snow damage a thing? Do I need to go check-”

Logan laughed softly, falling back against the pillows and covering his eyes with his forearm. “What – milk, eggs, and bread?”

“It’s a southern thing.” Logan couldn’t see him, but he could hear the pout in his voice. His vision was suddenly filled with blond bed-head and wide baby blues as Leo pulled his arm away from his face. If he could wake up to this every day, Logan would die a happy man. “Come on, sweetheart, I’m really freaking out right now.”

One of these days, the terms of endearment were actually going to kill him.

“I’m sure the diner’s fine. Besides, there’s not much we can do until the roads clear, so we’ll just have to wait it out.” Logan shifted over on the bed, leaving a Leo-sized spot open. He tugged on Leo’s arm until he crawled into bed, laying on his side to face Logan, their feet tangled together. Leo was wearing fuzzy socks.

Logan smiled at the sight in front of him, then closed his eyes again. “Go back to sleep, Leo. We’ll deal with it when-”

The door banged open to reveal Finn, face bright with excitement. “Snow! Have you guys seen all the snow? We should-” He stopped when he saw the two boys in bed, nestled together and still sleepy. He cleared his throat. “Uh, sorry. Didn’t mean to-”

“Cuddle.” Leo said, reaching up for Finn as well. “We should cuddle.” Finn smiled warmly and didn’t hesitate to clamber into bed on Logan’s other side, scooting in close and only elbowing Logan once as he got comfy. Logan grumbled, but quickly got over it when he felt a tentative arm wrap around him as he drifted back off to sleep.

.

Leo woke up to two boys asleep in bed with him and couldn’t think of a time when he was happier. They were all tangled together in a mess of limbs and blankets and pillows. It was warm and soft and Leo never wanted to leave. But he also wanted to surprise them with coffee and breakfast. Breakfast in bed wouldn’t be too obvious would it? He thought back to the past twenty-four hours and decided that if this wasn’t flirting, he wasn’t sure what was. Now it was just a matter of taking that next step and actually talking about it. So who cared if it was too obvious or not?

Leo glanced at Logan and Finn one last time. There was just something about seeing the two of them in his clothes. Logan’s sweaterpaws were visible from where he was grabbing onto Finn’s arm in his sleep. Finn was close to the same size as Leo so the clothes actually fit him pretty well. His face was pressed into brown hair, arm tightening around Logan as he huffed out a breath. The sight did something to Leo’s heart. He smiled dopily before sneaking out of bed, his back popping as he stretched. Ok, game plan: coffee, breakfast, talk. He could do this.

He crept down the hall and into the kitchen, trying to be as quiet as he could when getting a frying pan out and setting it on the stove. Next came the kettle for water to use in the French press, bacon, and ingredients to make homemade biscuits. Normally he would’ve done eggs, but they’d used all of them on the cookies yesterday.

The biscuits went into the oven and the bacon into the frying pan, sizzling away. So much for breakfast in bed. Leo knew the smell of food cooking would bring the other two out of the bedroom and, sure enough, he soon heard two pairs of footsteps headed towards him, one slightly muffled by too-long sweatpants hems dragging along the floor. He grabbed three mugs from the cabinet and sent a smile over his shoulder at the two boys.

Three cups of coffee: one black, one with cream only, and one with cream and sugar.

Leo pulled the biscuits out of the oven and quickly transferred them onto a plate, doing the same with the bacon before bringing both to the table.

“Leo, you’re an angel.” Finn said as he grabbed plates and silverware for the three of them. Logan hummed in agreement from in front of the fridge, where he was collecting butter and jams for the biscuits. They all joined each other at the kitchen table, still a little sleepy-eyed and half awake.

Leo, halfway through his first sip of coffee, passed Finn his mug of steaming black coffee, then Logan his own cup full of cream and sugar, just how he liked it. Logan looked down at it and sighed happily, “Love you, Nutter Butter.”

Finn’s head shot up. Leo choked on his coffee, cheeks heating up. Logan looked at them confusedly before he realized what he said and his face paled. “Shit.”

“You... you love me?” Leo asked, voice barely above a whisper.

Logan’s heart ached a little at the look on Leo’s face. God, he should’ve told him a long time ago. In response he just slowly nodded, hesitantly meeting wide eyes and hoping for the best.

Leo smiled, letting out a soft laugh. “Honey, I’ve loved you for months.” He took a deep breath, as if gathering up his courage, then reached out to grab Finn’s hand. “And I think I’m falling for you, too. Judging from the way Logan stares at you when you’re not looking, he feels the same.” Leo looked from Finn to Logan hopefully. “Right?”

Finn squeezed Leo’s hand, finally daring to hope. Maybe he could actually have this. His heart thundered in his chest, so loud that Logan and Leo were bound to hear it. “And how does he stare at me when I’m not looking?”

Leo’s eyes flicked over to Logan with a smile. “Take a look for yourself.”

Finn’s breath hitched as he looked over into evergreen eyes, bright and gazing at him the same way Finn had caught him staring at Leo so many times before. He laughed a little in relief, tracing Logan’s cheekbone with gentle fingers.

“I was a little worried we were never going to have this conversation. And I know we’ve got a lot to figure out, but...” He trailed off, a little in awe. What were the odds of this? Everything seemed to fall perfectly into place, like puzzle pieces. It wasn’t some huge revelation, though. There were no grand romantic gestures, no race against time, no frantic outburst. It was calm and gentle like the sun rising outside, casting everything in light pastels and golds.

Logan just laughed softly, scooting his chair back with a loud scraping noise and standing up. “Stop just sitting there and come here, I’ve been wanting to kiss you two for forever.”

Finn scrambled up from his seat and all but threw himself at Logan, nearly bowling him over as he kissed him enthusiastically, arms wrapped tightly around Logan’s waist. Leo smiled as he watched them. He loved their dynamic – the bickering and teasing like they’d known each other for years, and yet the head-over-heels way they looked at each other and held each other and kissed each other. They were so comfortable together, not shying away from anything it seemed. Leo couldn’t wait to see how their relationship grew and evolved over time. He couldn’t wait to see how all three of them would grow together. He stood too and joined Logan and Finn, pressing kisses to their cheeks, their jaws, their necks – anywhere he could reach.

Finn broke the kiss to press his forehead against Logan’s, eyes closed and smile a mile wide. “I’ve been wanting to do that since the first time I saw you at that farm.” His eyes turned to Leo next. He reached up and cupped Leo’s face in his hands. “And I’ve wanted to kiss you since that first bite of pie.”

“What, was the muffuletta not good enough for – mmph.” Leo’s teasing words got cut off by Finn’s lips on his. He sighed into the kiss, draping his arms over Finn’s freckled shoulders and angling his head to deepen the kiss. He could taste black coffee on Finn’s lips and had never loved the flavor more. There was another hand at his back, stroking over his spine. Logan. Leo leaned back into his hand before breaking away from Finn to look at Logan – the guy he’d been pining after for just shy of a year.

“How did I get so lucky?” He murmured, prompting Logan to lean up and kiss him, softly and heartbreakingly gentle. Leo kissed him with purpose, running his tongue against Logan’s bottom lip and causing his breath to hitch.

He thought back to his musings of the night before during his panic in his bedroom and laughed against Logan’s lips. The brunet made a questioning humming noise, so Leo leaned back just far enough to whisper, “Maybe I’m clairvoyant.”

Finn laughed, bewildered. “What?”

Leo just glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, smiled, and combed a finger through red tresses. Sleep-mussed hair, soft smiles, and rough morning voices. Sitting at the table together, nursing cups of coffee as the sun rose over a clean, white blanket of snow. Talking and laughing and sharing some coffee-flavored kisses. Those had been his thoughts last night. And here he was, suddenly getting all of those things.

“Nothing, sweetheart.” Leo said, looking down at his two with overflowing fondness as he thought of the future and hoped that those musings would come true, too.

[omg-im-such-a-masochist]

🎁🔥GUESS WHO?🔥🎁

Prompt: Y/N’s first day back to work from her vacation is also coincidentally her birthday, as the day goes by, one mysterious box is placed on her work table. The content of it is a devious surprise and Y/N needs to find out who is the mysterious person who dared to give her such a kinky birthday present.

Word count: Long-ish

Pairing: Roman Reigns x Reader

Warnings: +18, smut, bondage(handcuffs), use of a vibrator, fingering, rough sex, mentions of voyeurism, oral sex (female receiving), dirty talk, cursing.

My Roman lovers: @ziasaph, @reigns-5sos, @mindofasagittaruis

Notes: What a better way to start 2021, then with a Roman kinky fic?! I wish you all a Happy New Year loves, may 2021 be kinder to us all. Y’all know the drill loves,sorry for misspellings,english isn’t my first language (bla bla bla),check out my other stories if you’d like to(it would make your girl here very happy 😊) and if you’re comfortable with it,please let me know what you think? Some feedback is always welcomed and appreciated ❤️You can check out my other stories typing ‘masochist writes’ on the search bar on my page and my newest story as a fixed post.Okay,now let’s get to the fun part,shall we? Hope you’ll enjoy 😉

“Happy birthday, to you..” I turn around to the sound of a person singing, just to see Sasha Banks holding a chocolate cupcake and a present bag on her hands.

“Hi Sasha.” I smiled

“Happy birthday babe!” Sasha ran up to me, placing the cupcake on my working table and hugging me tightly.

“Thanks Sasha”

This was my first day back from my vacation, and coincidentally it was also my birthday, so I was excited to see some of the good friends I’ve made while working for the WWE as a chiropractor.

“Here this is for you!” Sasha handed me a present bag.

“Oh Sasha, you really didn’t have to-“

“Shush! I love you, so of course I would pamper you on your birthday” Sasha said as I opened the bag to find a pair of Louboutin’s I had my eyes on for quite sometime, but couldn’t afford it.

“Sasha, are you insane? I can’t accept these! It’s way too expensive!” I gasped

“I am perfectly sane, you will accept these and I don’t care if you think they’re too expensive! I love you, you’re one of my best friends in this company and a human being with a heart made of gold. So if there is someone who deserves these is you” She happily said

“Sasha, I don’t even know how to thank you enough” I whispered with tears on my eyes

“Just say you will be my friend forever babe” She winked

“I don’t need presents to be your friend love”

“That’s why I gave it to you. I don’t care how much they cost, I just want to make my best friend happy on her birthday”

I hugged her and whispered ‘thank you’ on her ear

“So, who else has came here today?” She asked

“Oh! Bayley, Charlotte, Xavier, Kofi, Cesaro, Big E, Alexa, Naomi, Jey, Becky, Seth, Finn, Renee and Dean” I said, listing my close friends

“I was the last one then? Damn it!”

“It’s ok, I know you were busy today love”

“So...no Roman?” She whispered

“No, no Roman” I answered slightly disappointed.

Sasha along with Bayley and Renee were the only 3 people who knew about my stupid crush on Roman Reigns. It’s so stupid of me to think that a man like him would ever look at someone like me.

If he would ever look at someone on this company, it wouldn’t be the thick girl who worked as a chiropractor and yes one of the beautiful toned Divas of this company.

But still I couldn’t help but daydream about having him on top of me.

“Maybe he doesn’t know it’s your birthday?” Sasha tried to make it less uncomfortable

“Really Sasha? He’s friends with Dean! Everybody knows Dean is an open mouth, loud as fuck and can’t keep it to himself not even if his life depended on it...Roman just chose to ignore it, and it’s fine. We’re not close or anything so, I wasn’t expecting him to show up at my office door and fuck me on top of this table” I lied while chuckling weirdly

“Let’s be honest babe, everybody secretly wants Roman Reigns to fuck them on top of a table!” We both laughed at her statement before she continued “It’s his loss anyways babe”

“Yeah I guess so...”

I was making my way back to my office, from the women’s locker room, when a big black box with a golden ribbon called my attention on top of my desk.

“What the hell?” I said as I approached the box carefully. All of my closest friends had already wished me a happy birthday and gave me their presents so this was, to say the least, weird and unexpected.

I saw a blood red card on top of it, so I opened to find the handwritten saying

‘I hope these will make your birthday night unforgettable. Can you guess who’ve bought these for you? ;)’

Ok, that’s pretty fucking weird! I thought

From the corner of my eye I saw Sasha passing by and loudly whispered

“Sasha! Come here”

She entered my office “What’s up girl? Are you ok? You look scared”

I closed my office door and locked, and made my way back to the table by her side.

“Ok, I’m feeling a little paranoid. I just came back to my office to find this box and this card. Here” I handed the card to her and she red silently.

“Did you look what’s inside of it?” Sasha said

“Nope. And to be honest I don’t know if I can..what if it’s like a prank or something?”

“Well, there’s only one way to find out Y/N”

She opened the box, inside of it there was a fancy red paper, I took it out of the way to reveal what was underneath it and I tell you I almost passed out.

Inside the box there was a lavender and purple (my favorite colors) vibrator, it was actually pretty cute...two pairs of handcuffs, lube, nipples clamps and a whip.

“Oh my gosh” Sasha gasped as she took the clamps on one hand and the whip on the other. “Someone wants to get kinky with you girl!” She examined the items carefully

“What in the actual fuck?” I whispered shocked “Give me that!” I took the items out of her hand, shoved back into the box and quickly closed with the black lid.

“Jesus, I can get fired if someone sees that in my office! Who the hell would do that?”

“Someone who wants to get some! And wants it rough” She chuckled

“Sasha it’s not funny! I could not have a job tomorrow morning if someone from the company found these”

“Who do you think did this?” She asked seriously

“How am I supposed to know? I have no fucking clue!”

“Maybe someone who’s name starts with an R...” She smirked

“R?... What ar-... Oh hell no! Nu uh, that’s impossible!” She couldn’t be implying that Roman was behind this, was he? No! Of course not, that’s a dumb thing to think of...but a part of me wished it was him, even though I know it wasn’t.

“Why impossible? You’re a gorgeous woman Y/N! You two would make a beautiful couple, plus, I‘ve seen his handwriting before and I’m pretty sure it’s quite similar to this one” She said as she inspected the card closely.

“Obviously someone wants to make fun out of me, so I’ll just pretend this never happened” I took the card out of her hand and shoved inside the box.

“Or someone has an eye on you for a while and decided to finally make a move”

“Sasha, please don’t tell this to anyone”

“Your secret is safe with me babe. Just promise that when your secret admirer finally show up, you’ll tell me if you guys made a good use of his presents” She laughed

“You’re the worst!” I laughed along

I made my way back to my hotel room later that evening with my hands so full of packages I could barely walk. I opened the door and carefully placed the bags, along with the black box, on the floor.

I went to the bed and sat down on the edge, while I stared at the box.

*Could Sasha be right? Could it be Roman who did this?* Was the only thought that crossed my mind

I decided to forget all about it and take a shower to wash off the day.

As I was rinsing my hair I heard some noise coming from the bedroom

*What the hell was that?*

I blamed on my super active mind and turned the shower off.

I got changed into some clean oversized t- shirt, and went full on commando. I was brushing my damp hair, when I decided to lay out the contents of the black box on the bed.

I roamed my eyes on each item slowly, until they stopped on the lavender and purple happiness. I turned the vibrator on and felt slightly tempted to use it.

*Oh fuck it! Happy birthday to me I guess”

I got rid of the t-shirt and lay down on the bed naked.

I closed my eyes, letting my mind imagine my wet dream, in form of a man... his face, his body, his cock and how I wish I could feel it inside of me, stretching me as I teased my clit with the vibrator.

I moaned Roman’s name and heard someone clear their throat on the foot of the bed. My eyes shot open and my heart nearly stopped beating when I saw who was in front of me. The vision was so unexpected that I even forgot I was naked.

“I see you liked my gift then” He smirked

“Wh- What are you doing here? How did you get inside of my room?” I whispered

“Does it matter?” His eyes had an evil glimpse to it

“Roman... I- I can explain” I begin to stutter

He placed his index finger on his lips in a shh motion and I stopped talking. He hungrily stared at every inch of my naked body, making me feel quite self conscious of the imperfections of it. I grabbed the blanket to cover my nakedness, he notice what I was about to do and yanked the blankets off the bed

“I’ve been waiting for years to see you like this, so don’t you dare cover yourself from me now”

He took off his shirt and pants leaving only his boxers on, from where I was laying I could see the outline of his hard cock and the wet spot of pre cum near of it’s head. He crawled on top of me slowly, like a predator, with dangerous eyes that were glued to my own.

“At first I was only gonna watch you... I wanted to see you pleasure yourself with my gifts, but when I saw your body fully naked on this bed moaning my name” He grunted “I couldn’t control myself, I couldn’t see this” He took the vibrator off my hand and placed on the bed by our side “Having all the fun with you, enjoying every part of your beautiful body, stretching your sweet pussy while my own cock only got to watch, he wants to have his own fun with you baby girl. He wants to make you feel real good” He leaned closer to my face, his lips brushing mine as he asked “Do you want that Y/N? Do you want my cock to make you feel good? Do you want it to stretch you out baby? Do you want it to fuck you hard and rough? Or do you prefer it slow and sweet? Do you want me to fuck you from behind?...Or maybe I should eat you out first huh? Eat that sweet pussy until you’re begging me to stop, I can’t wait to feel you come on my mouth...around my cock,milking it really nice” He growled “Tell me Y/N, what do you want?”

“I want it all, I want everything” I panted as he dry humped me

“Will you let me do whatever I want with you baby girl? What I’ve always wanted to do?”

“Yes”

He smiled satisfied, leaning to kissed me roughly and sloppily as he grabbed both of my wrists into one of his big hands pining it over my head.

“If anything I do bothers you or you feel like your not feeling it or don’t like it, you let me know ok?”

I nodded

“I need words baby girl”

“Yes, I understand”

“Good” He smiled and I felt something cold close around my wrists. I looked up to see the handcuffs around my wrists being closed on the headboard of the bed. Roman sat up and looked down do my naked body at his disposal.

“Fuck, you’re such a gorgeous sight” He said as he palmed his hard cock through his boxers. “I can’t wait to bury my cock deep inside you” He panted

“Roman, please do something” I whispered

His hands roamed the sides of my body until he stopped at my breasts as his hands squeezed them hard while pinching my nipples.

“These were made just for me. Do you see how they perfectly fit my hands? I can only imagine how even more beautiful your breasts will look with my cock sliding in between them” His eyes were glued on my breasts.

I tugged at my handcuffed hands, begging “Roman, please, I need- something”

“Let’s take a look on this pussy...are you wet for me Y/N?”

“Soaked”

He raised his eyebrows “Really? Let‘s see” Two of his fingers slides through my folds “Fuck baby girl, you are soaked. Jesus, we won’t even need lube” His fingers traced lazy circles around my clit, making me moan in pleasure. One callused finger slipped inside of me.

“Oh baby girl, you’re so tight, fuck I will barely be able to move. I can’t wait to feel your sweet little pussy stretch around my cock”

He took his finger out and cleaned with his tongue, humming in pleasure to the taste of my juices.

“You taste amazing, Y/N. Fuck I need more” He slide down my body placing his head between my thighs. His tongue gave a long lick from my entrance to my clit sucking it. Making his way back to my entrance again dipping his tongue inside of me, beginning to fuck me with his tongue.

“Oh my god, Roman, please fuck me! I need you inside of me please” I whined

“As you wish baby” He smirked

He slides his cock through my folds to lube it up, then places the head of his cock at my entrance

“Are you sure about this baby girl? ‘Cause once I start I won’t be able to stop myself”

“Roman, just fuck me already would you?” I said impatiently

He chuckled lightly saying “Easy tiger, we’ll take this slow, I don’t want to hurt you” Roman leaned down to peck my lips and returned to his previous position.

He started to slowly slide inside of me, inch by inch, painfully slow. He’s the biggest man I’ve ever been with, so I knew that we needed to take it slow, but fuck he feels so good I just wish he would roughly thrust into me, so I wiggle my hips to take more of him.

“Fuck Y/N, slow down! You’re too tight and I’m not exactly small, if you keep rushing things you’re gonna end up hurting yourself and I don’t want that”

“I know is just that your cock feels so fucking good, I just want you to fuck me Ro”

“Trust me baby, there’s nothing that I want more then fuck you senseless, but I want you to enjoy it as well ok?” He kissed my nose then my lips

When all of him was finally inside of me we both moaned loudly, I’ve never felt so full before and it was both a dream and a nightmare

“Motherfucker! Jesus fuck Y/N, you’re so fuckin- Oh my god.. I gotta focus ‘cuz I feel like at the slightest move I’ll cum” He pressed his forehead to mine as his thumb slowly traced circles on my clit.

“Roman” I gasped “Please don’t tease me like that, fuck it feels so fucking good” I cried as I felt my walls tighten around him

“Oh fuck!” Roman growled loudly “Don’t do that baby girl, don’t squeeze my cock like that, you’re gonna make m-“

“Move,please” I circled my hips

“Fuck it” He said as he forcefully grabbed my hips and begin to quickly thrust me.

“Oh Roman...harder, I need harder”

“Harder?” He chuckled “Like this?” He pounded into me mercilessly

“Yes! Just like that, oh please, don’t stop” “Fuck Y/N you’re going to get me addicted to you baby girl” He kissed my lips vigorously

“I say we should push you a little further..” Roman took the vibrator from the bed and placed on my clit.

“Ooohhh”

“Fuck, you look so beautiful baby girl, a whimpering mess underneath me”

“Ro- Roman I’m gonna cum”

“Cum baby, I wanna feel you cum around my cock”

And I did. My orgasm was so hard that my juices made a mess on Roman’s thighs and the bedsheets.

“Y/N, fuck baby...so fucking gorgeous, my messy girl” He chuckled “Where do you want me to cum baby?”

“Inside” I panted while I felt another mini orgasm come through me

“Fuck, I’m officially addicted to you baby girl. You’re my wet dream come true...gorgeous face, delicious body, perfect pussy..so tight for me. And on top of it all, you want my cum inside of you?! You are beyond perfect Y/N”

He thrusts into me 3 more times before finally cum, filling me up with his seed.

As we tried to recover our breaths, Roman uncuffed my wrists and placed a sweet kiss into each one.

“You ok baby girl?”

“Mhmm” I hummed

“Did I hurt you? Was I too rough?”

“No, of course not. You were perfect!”

“Good baby” He smiled

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure thing baby”

“Why? Why me?”

“Why not you?” He asked sincerely while he brushed my hair with his fingers

“I don’t know, I can’t picture someone like you with someone like me.. I mean, there are so many beautiful women in the company that fit you better...I’ve never thought you could find me attractive”

“Are you serious? Have you looked yourself in the mirror? You’re gorgeous, so perfect Y/N. Yes, there are beautiful women in the company but they’re nothing compared to you baby. You stand out, exactly because you’re different from all of them. You’re unique”

“Still...I don’t know..”

“Oh so you don’t believe me? Maybe I’ll have to show you then”

I could feel his cock beginning to harden on my thigh

“Show me? How?”

“Well baby girl, good thing there are more items of the box for us to try it huh?”

“Us?”

“Yeah, you don’t really think that I’m gonna let you go right? Now that I’ve tasted you, you’ve got me hooked baby. We’ve got the whole night for me to change your mind about us together. And I bet you that I will” He smirked as he leaned down to kiss my neck...

What a great way to celebrate my birthday 🎁

[livingforcoopsandoknutzy]

Prompt 50: "Please make it stop."

O'Knutzy

TW: panic attacks

Characters by the beautiful @lumosinlove

Logan wasn’t always an anxious person, most people didn’t even know he was but he had a talent for overthinking things, which was exactly what he was doing now.

   Finn and Leo were out getting dinner since Leo didn’t want to cook tonight and Logan was fine when they left but then he had gotten on Twitter to find hundreds of posts about people theorizing the actual relationship between Leo, Finn, and Logan.

   They were all fighting about who was actually dating who since they were all so close but Logan was too freaked out to try to reason that they were just theories. Flashbacks of Loops and Cap’s photos came back and hit him full force and stealing his breath. This wasn’t happening, they didn’t actually know.

   Most of the comments were people being nice but the ones where people responded by telling them it was disgusting and that Leo, Logan, and Finn would never be disgusting poofs were the ones that Logan couldn’t shake.

   He had to stop reading the comments when his hands were shaking too hard to keep his phone still. He was aware of the fact that he wasn’t breathing normally but he couldn’t do anything about it when he was so worked up.

   It wasn’t fair that they had to stay hidden, he wanted to love his boys in public. He didn’t want to have to hide but he couldn’t imagine the hate they’d get. He didn’t- he couldn’t do that to Finn and Leo, they didn’t deserve it.

   Growing up in Quebec did nothing when it came to comfort, it was unheard of to be gay there. Finn and Leo were both out to their families but Logan wasn’t. His sisters knew but that was it, he physically couldn’t tell his parents. He’d tried before but he had just thrown up from the nerves and chickened out.

   He owed it to the boys to come out, he wasn’t ashamed of them and he didn’t want them to think that but it was so scary. He knew the team would back them up but he was too scared to let anyone else know.

   Logan was seeing stars at the point, his whole body was trembling and his cheeks were wet but he wasn’t sure when he started crying. His body was jerking randomly and he was gasping but the air wouldn’t stay in his lungs.

   After five more minutes of gasps, tears, and stars, the door opened and he heard Leo and Finn laughing. Logan got off the couch unsteadily and stumbled over to them.

   Finn was putting the takeout on the counter so only Leo saw him coming. Leo had turned to him with a smile that quickly dissipated when he saw Logan. He was relieved to finally have his boys home but the energy it had taken to get to Leo had him more breathless than he already was and his vision was dimming rapidly.

   “Make it stop,” Logan gasped as his legs gave out. “Please make it stop.” He said through his tears as Leo caught him and sank to the floor. Leo wrapped his arms tightly around Logan and held him to his chest, Logan seated between his legs. Logan rested his forehead on Leo’s collarbone and tried to stop shaking to no avail. 

   “Baby, breathe for me.” Leo said in his ears, rocking them gently. “Lo, you have to breathe. Je t'ai, respire.” Logan tried but couldn’t help the shaking gasps still coming out of him. “What happened? What’s going on? Lo?” He heard Finn’s frantic questions and felt his breathing come impossibly faster as he curled into Leo. 

   He wasn’t trying to scare Finn or Leo, he hadn’t meant to freak Finn out. 

   “Finn, you have to calm down you’re making it worse. Can you get some water and a cool rag?” Leo said calmly, his hand rubbing soothing circles on Logan’s back. “Make it stop.” Logan whimpered, burying his head in Leo’s chest. 

   “It’ll pass, you just gave to give it a minute I’ve got you.” Leo murmured softly, placing a gentle kiss on Logan’s dark curls. Logan felt Leo take his hand and place it over his chest. “Can you breathe with me? Copy my breathing.” He said quietly as he exaggerated his breathing, taking deep breaths. 

   Logan tried his best to copy but it was hard. He felt something cold on his neck and was relieved when his thoughts were overthrown by the sudden coldness. His breaths were still stuttering but he was copying Leo’s breaths better. “You’re doing so good Lo, couple more okay?” Logan nodded the best he could and copied Leo’s breathing until he could do it on his own.

   When Logan was sure he wasn’t going to spiral again he slumped against Leo’s chest, curling up with his eyes closed. Leo hugged him tightly and he felt Finn’s hand on his cheek. Logan opened his eyes slowly with a small smile.

   “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Finn let out a disbelieving laugh. “God Lo, don’t apologize for that.” Finn ran a calming hand through Logan’s curls and he leaned into the touch with a soft sigh. 

   “Baby, what happened?” Leo said just as softly as he had when Logan was panicking. “Nothing.” He said softly and backtracked when Leo and Finn pinned him with exasperated looks. “It wasn’t important, it was stupid and I overreacted.” He mumbled, turning his face so he could hide in Leo’s chest.

   “If it made you react like that it wasn’t stupid at all.” Finn said softly, kissing Logan’s forehead when he turned to breathe again, suffocating slightly in the material of Leo’s sweatshirt. Logan sighed and listened to Leo’s heartbeat, a warm feeling spreading through his body as he felt the comfort of his boys. He couldn’t lose them.

   With a groan, Logan sat up and crossed his legs as he picked at the sweatshirt he was wearing. Technically the sweatshirt was Finn’s but at this point, it was as much his as Finn’s.

   “I’m scared.” Logan said quietly, his throat constricting with the effort he was taking to not shed any more tears. Why was it always so hard to fight tears when you were already crying. Finn rested his chin on Logan’s shoulder and Logan rested his head against Finn’s.

   “I don’t- I can’t come out yet. I can’t and they all suspect something, and I can’t lose y’all.” He said and silently cursed the tears that slid down his face. “Hey, you won’t lose us, nothing you could ever do could make us go away. You’re stuck with us baby.” Finn said gently, nudging Logan’s head softly with his own. 

   Leo’s forehead met his own and Logan closed his eyes, soaking in the warmth he always got with both of his boys. “We understand why you don’t want to come out and it’s fine, you’re not going to lose us because of that. Vous ne pouvez pas vous débarrasser de nous aussi facilement.”

  Logan let out a watery laugh and Leo bent his head slightly to kiss Logan on the nose. Finn placed a gentle kiss on his neck before standing up and giving both of them a hand to pull themselves up.

   Finn led them to the couch and Logan sat between them, his head resting on Finn’s chest and his hands going through Leo’s blonde hair where he had placed his head in Logan’s lap. Logan felt a rush of relief that these were the two sweethearts he had ended up with. 

   With a contented sigh, he let himself fall asleep between his two favorite people in the world. His boys.

[achliegh]

British V-Sign

Punk Rock Leo? If y’all want a series of this you will have to let me know because I like this, but it also reminds me of something a 12 year old would write. (Cringe)

TW/CW: Swearing, Drinking, and a blowie in the bathroom lol, if there are others let me know I can’t think of anything else.

Sergei was on the phone with someone. Everyone else was in the shower or getting into their game day suits. Everyone was a little bummed because they just lost against the Rangers, 3-0. It stung but with Kasey being their only goalie and having a pulled thigh muscle makes it hard on the team.

Sergei was pulling on his blazer, he laughed into the phone and nodded as if the person on the line could see him. No one really paid attention, usually people get calls in the locker room from family, then again Sergei was speaking English. Suspicious.

“I will let them know! The whole team got it!” He hung up and whistled for everyone's attention. When all eyes were on him and mostly dressed he made his announcement. “Okay, I have the entire team invited to go to a free Punk Rock concert!”

“You like Punk? Sergei, why did I never know about this?” Dumo walks over to stand next to his friend and puts a hand on his shoulder. Sergei punches him in the arm slightly and rolls his eyes.

“I don’t really care for it, but an old friend of mine's son plays and has a concert at the Barclays Center. I thought you would like to go, maybe cheer up.” He smiles that sweet smile he always puts on when he wants to do something but not go alone. Most of the team agrees, Sunny and Sirius decide that concerts aren’t really their place and decide to stay at the hotel.

Everyone went to the hotel to change into something more comfortable. Finn knocked on Logan's door because he was taking forever. Finn didn’t really know what to wear to a punk concert so he went with his normal ripped black skinny jeans and a white shirt and some white tennis shoes. When Logan finally opened the door the room was a mess as expected, he shook his head as Logan held up two shirts for him to pick from.

Logan was so indecisive that Finn being his best friend made all his decisions for him. Once Logan was dressed in a Metallica black and white tie-dyed shirt with the sleeves cut off and some light wash baggy and ripped jeans, he threw on his stupid boots that weighed like 20 pounds but Logan took everywhere.

Everyone was waiting for them by the time they walked out of the elevator, the usual chirping about being late ensued as everyone piled into the vans waiting for them. They were expecting some small concert hall with a couple of mediocre bands that would sound great after a few drinks. Instead everyone but Finn was taken aback when they pulled up outside one of the biggest concert halls in NYU. Sergei went first and gave the bouncer a word. He let them through without hesitation. Leading them into a taped off area of the mosh pit.

“Sergei who the hell do you know!?” Finn was looking around so confused but also in awe. “Do you have a past we don’t know about?” Sergei laughed and shook his head, patting Finn a little hard on the back.

“Nope! You remember the travelling Junior Professional teams I used to coach.” Some of the older players nodded while Logan and Finn shook their heads. “Well I used to coach Eloise Knut’s son. He was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis last year as he was on the road to recovery from a torn ACL. He used to just do music for a hobby but now it’s his whole life.” Sergei shrugs as Finn and Logan gawk at him. Dumo snaps a picture of the two and sends it to the group chat.

“You mean Eloise Knut the absolute hockey LEGEND!” Finn looks at Logan then back at Sergei. “You’re shitting me.” Sergei shakes his head again as the lights start to dim and the band comes out. They all turned to face the stage, it was too dark to see anyone clearly but they knew people were up there.

Suddenly, a spotlight shines down on an angel, a giant angel. He’s tall built blonde with a green streak over his left temple missing with his beautifully golden angel curls. The mop of hair suit his face, a mesh shirt tucked into some bagged Black torn to shreds jeans and four inch platform boots. His golden skin glowed from under the light with a cloud of twinkles on his face that must be piercing's that can’t be seen from this far away. They also notice some black smudges around his eyes.

Logan is suddenly very thirsty. He got even thirstier when this angel opened his mouth. The songs were amazing, they were punk and crazy but also not anything he ever imagined. Everyone around them was dancing, drinking and laughing. Whooping when the angel from the stage came closer to sing directly to the group and pointed at Sergei before waving at him with the sweetest smile.

He was close enough Finn could make out his piercings, a septum a simile, an eyebrow and so many in his ears. What took his breath away is when the angel had been focusing so much on his bass solo that his tongue poked out of his mouth… and it was pierced.

Finn and Logan both took big gulps of water at the same time, then gave each other pointed looks saying ‘You too?’ They both nodded and looked back on stage. Standing so close the back of their hands were touching. There had always been an unspoken thing between them but unspoken was always unspoken unless they were slightly inebriated somehow. So they never did anything around the team. But, this angel was pushing them close and closer to having to drink.

Once the performance came to an intermission Logan and Finn shared a look. Then they told the team they were going to the bathroom. Being told to be safe they made it to the bathroom, luckily it was empty. Logan had Finn pinned to the door in a matter of seconds.

“Please tell me you saw that gorgeous man!” Logan was dropping to his knees and undoing Finn’s belt and jeans before Finn could even process what was happening. A shocked moan was ripped from his throat as Logan swallowed him down with no hesitation. It didn’t take long for Logan to pull an orgasm from Finn. Logan loves going down on Finn so making him finish was easy, without even being touched. Logan stood back up as Finn was fixing himself. He washed his hands and splashed some water on his face.

“Yeah” Finn is still trying to catch his breath as he finishes his belt. “I saw him.”

They get back to the team without drawing too much attention to themselves, again standing so close to each other but this time their pinkies are linked. Finn is all bright smiles the rest of the night while Logan is a bit more shy than normal. Blushing at the slightest joke.

Once the concert ended and everyone crawled back into their respective beds they still couldn’t get that boy out of their heads.

The next morning on the car ride to the airport Finn tapped on Logan's headphones and showed him his phone. He has typed out a tweet that had Leo (They eventually got his name from Sergei) tagged.

“I’ve never been to a Punk concert but @peanut made me fall in love <3” It had a picture of him and Logan, and another that was just Leo. Logan was tagged on the side. Logan nodded, smiling and clicks post for Finn.

What they weren't expecting was a response when they landed.

[ais-for-alex]

The Scars of Our Past: chapter 21

So this is a very important chapter to the story and I don’t want to spoil anything but there are descriptions of traumatic events, death, and injuries so please read with caution if you are sensitive to anything of that nature. Anyway I hope y’all enjoy 🥰

You’re getting in too deep, Knut.

Leo blinked away the thought as he followed Logan up the stairs towards Finn's apartment. His mind wandered back to the two of them sitting in that courtyard with the soft music and the radiant warmth of the fire as their companions. And when he had glanced over to see the orange glow of firelight dancing over Logan’s face Leo’s heart ached at that look in his eyes. He could see that Logan felt so much inside but he was held back by the crippling fear of the unknown and the unspoken, Leo couldn’t stop himself from reaching out.

Damn, you are such a hypocrite. Talking about fear like you haven’t been living in the shadow of loss for so long you barely know what sunlight looks like anymore. Too scared to move on, too scared to let go.

This is different, Leo told himself, silencing those nagging words just as they got to the front door.

“Hey Fish, you here?” he called out as they slipped inside and began shedding jackets and scarves before wandering farther into the apartment.

“In here,” Finn said just as he and Logan walked into the living room to find him hanging upside-down from the recliner, one leg thrown over the back and the other over the arm. There was some tv show playing quietly in the background but Finn wasn’t really watching rather he was holding his phone precariously over his face playing some word game.

Leo laughed, “Is your default state just upside down?”

“Yes.”

“Yes,” both Finn and Logan said at the same time, causing him to look up and see them.

“Lo?” he asked, Finn rolled off the chair in surprise falling to the floor with a thump, Leo could hear a bit of uncertainty in his voice.

“Hey,” Logan said softly, locking eyes with Finn, “Leo mentioned food so I tagged along, hope that’s ok?”

“’Course,” he answered without a thought, scrambling up off the floor, “you know you’re always welcome here.”

There was a tension between them, Leo could feel it bend and stretch like an elastic band tied between these two men. It flexed as they moved, pulled taught like they were testing how far it would stretch before snapping. This thing between Finn and Logan was strong though, nearly tangible with the intensity of whatever past lay in the space separating them. Something inside him was telling Leo that rather than breaking under their pull it was more likely that the elastic band would snap back into place, leaving behind sore red welts as raw and tender as the emotions tying them together in the first place.

“Alright,” Leo said, bumping his hip lightly against Logan still standing next to him, “I’m gonna go start working on dinner.”

Logan finally looked away from Finn's hot cocoa eyes to glance up at Leo, “Now this I’ve got to see,” he said with a laugh.

“Oh come on,” Leo huffed an exasperated chuckle, “just cause you guys can’t cook doesn’t mean nobody else can.”

“How do you know I can’t cook, hmm? I might be a master chef in disguise,” Logan joked.

Finn scoffed at that before slinging an arm over Logan’s shoulders and pulling him into a headlock, “come on Lo, no one’s gonna believe that.”

Leo rolled his eyes and made his way into the kitchen, Finn and Logan’s chatter followed close behind as he began pulling ingredients out of the newly stocked fridge and cabinets.

“This looks suspiciously healthy,” Logan commented while Leo washed and prepped a variety of veggies, he and Finn had settled at the counter to watch and talk as he cooked.

“Don’t make that face,” Leo laughed at the grimace Logan made, “healthy can be good.”

“Lo has an aversion to vegetables,” Finn teased, knocking their shoulders together.

“I do not,” he huffed back, “just if given the choice they’re not my first pick.”

“Well, then what would be your first pick? What’s your favorite food?” Leo asked as he began working on the chicken.

Logan closed his eyes and leaned his head back, “probably, filet mignon. Mmm,” he hummed low in his throat like he was imagining it.

“Ok, I’ll give that to you, few things trump steak,” Leo said, “maybe I’ll make it next time.” When Leo glanced up he met sparkling emerald eyes and Logan’s happy grin, it made his breath catch in his throat.

“So, whatcha making tonight?” Finn asked, resting his chin to rest in his hand against the counter while watching Leo work.

“I thought I’d do a honey and sesame chicken with a teriyaki stir fry,” Leo replied, snagging some seasoning off the counter.

“Ahh,” Finn sighed, wilting down to lay against the counter, “that sounds delicious.”

Both Leo and Logan laughed at his dramatics, their conversation dissolved into Finn and Logan’s upcoming game as Leo made dinner. Leo was only listening with half an ear but it sounded like they were concerned about their goalie who was struggling with an injury to his thigh. Soon the kitchen was filled with sizzling and the warm smell of cooking food making their stomachs grumble, by the time Leo had finished all three of them were salivating over the delicious looking meal.

As Leo was putting the finishing touches on the stir fry and pulled it from the heat of the stove he watched Finn slide off his stool at the counter before making his way over to the cabinets and grabbing plates. Logan wandered over to the fridge and snagged drinks for each of them. He was a little struck by how smoothly the three of them worked together; they moved and orbited around each other, somehow knowing exactly what the others needed and providing it before they could ask.

Once he had gotten his food Leo wandered back into the living room and settled on the far end of the couch, Finn and Logan joined only a moment later their plates piled high with food. Finn flopped on the opposite side of the couch, squishing back into the cushions comfortably. Logan chose to settle down and sit on the carpet near Finn’s legs, his back resting against the bottom of the couch as he placed his plate on the coffee table in front of him before pulling out his phone.

“Alright, what are we watching?” he asked, tilting his head back to look at Finn and Leo.

“Whatever is fine with me,” Finn said before shoveling a forkful of stir fry into his mouth.

Logan turned and fixed him with a disbelieving stare, “Fish, we both know you are literally the biggest movie snob on the planet, and will have very strong opinions on whatever we end up watching. We also know that if you make me choose again, we will be watching Fast and Furious.”

“Nooooo, not again!” Finn groaned, making Leo snort a laugh.

“What about you Le,” Logan asked, “any movie preferences?”

For a moment Leo’s brain shorted out at the nickname and the casual way it fell from Logan’s lips, he blinked hard realizing that he was supposed to be answering a question, “umm, well I always love a trashy disaster movie.”

“Sharknado!” Finn shouted, bouncing with excitement while trying not to spill his food.

“Yeah, that works for me,” he laughed.

“Alright, Sharknado it is,” Logan pulled it up on his phone and cast it to the Tv, while they all settled in with their dinners.

Leo tried to focus on the movie, he really did. However, it seemed that his attention couldn’t help but be pulled back to the two men next to him. He felt a little smile forming on his face as he watched them bicker back and forth about something silly a character on screen said, as he watched Finn lean down and ask for the veggies Logan had picked out of his food, watched them shoot glances at each other when they thought the other wouldn’t see. It was weird, this feeling that had begun pooling in his chest while watching them; Leo felt warm and giddy with it, it felt like summer sunlight was caught inside him making everything glow golden.

A soft contented sigh fell from his lips as Leo leaned over to stack his empty plate with Finn and Logan’s on the coffee table, he shifted in his spot turning to burrow into the squishy cushions and bring his feet up to rest on the spot in the middle of the sofa. Before he could stop himself, Leo let his legs extend to press his socked feet under Finn's warm thigh. And when Finn glanced up at him, a soft little smile at his lips, Leo flushed suddenly submerged in chocolate fondue eyes. Something inside him squirmed happily when Finn simply smiled a bit wider and rested his hand on Leo’s ankle before turning back to the movie.

Leo happily let himself drift in and out of a light doze while they watched, it seemed like one minute he blinked and the next Logan was turning the volume on the tv down as the credits rolled over the screen. Taking a deep breath that turned into a huge yawn Leo shifted a bit and reached up, stretching out the soreness from sitting in the same position too long.

He heard a soft chuckle from the floor and looked down only to meet Logan's bright eyes sparkling with the grin on his lips, “so you’re the type to sleep through the movie.”

“Guilty,” Leo said, suppressing another yawn.

“Ok, question,” Finn said in a mock serious voice, making Leo glance up at him, “promise not to be weirded out.”

“Alright shoot.”

Finn shifted watching Leo, he had his phone in his hand, “Do you not have social media? Cause I swear I have been trying to cyber stalk you since like the first time we met and I am finding nothing, zilch, nadda. The internet says you don’t exist. Which I find vaguely interesting cause I low key pride myself on my ability to find out pretty much anything about anybody, but for you… nothing.”

Leo couldn’t hold back the laugh that bubbled up out of him at the frustrated pout on Finn's face, “Yeah, I do have social media. I’m surprised you couldn’t find me; everything is just under my name.”

“That’s what I tried!” he cried.

“Did you spell it right?”

“I mean yeah? I think so, there’s only one way to spell it right? L-E-O Leo N-E-W-T Newt.”

Leo snorted out another laugh, “Fish, my last name is spelled K-N-U-T.”

Finn’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion for a moment then relaxed as he shot a look that seemed to be filled with a mixture of exasperation and disbelief, “wait a minute are you telling me your last name is Knut , and has been this entire time.”

“It's still pronounced like newt.”

Finn sighed, shaking his head. “Knut,” he glanced down at Logan and for a moment it seemed like they had an entire conversation in that one look, then chuckled softly, “Nutty.”

“Peanut,” Logan huffed a laugh.

“Ooo, Peanut Butter,” Finn shot back.

“Nutter Butter!” Logan supplied slapping Finn's thigh in excitement, “man, there is just so much potential for nicknames in that.”

“Right!” Finn exclaimed, “how did we not know this?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Leo chuckled, “laugh it up. I’ve heard all of them before.”

“Did you hear that Lo? I think Butternut Squash over here is challenging us.”

“That’s what it sounded like to me,” Logan said, turning to look up at Leo, “are you challenging us Peanut Brittle?”

At that Leo completely lost it, he could barely breathe through his snorts of laughter, “Oh, god! I suddenly feel like I’ve made a grave mistake.”

“Awe, don’t worry Banana Nut Muffin, we take nicknames very seriously,” Finn said in a sympathetic voice as he reached out and patted Leo’s leg softly, this only prompted Leo to laugh even harder.

It took a couple minutes before their laughter died down to only the occasional chuckle. Leo was warm and relaxed; his body pressed into the crease between the cushions, he could hear the little bubble click sounds as Finn typed on his phone.

Both Leo and Logan’s eyes suddenly snapped onto Finn when a sharp gasp was sucked into his lungs.

“You ok up there, Fish?” Logan asked

“I- um yeah… it’s just-“ Finn was still looking down at his phone, “um… Le?”

“Hm?” Leo hummed, waiting for Finn to say whatever it was he wanted to ask.

“Is this… is this about you?” he asked, holding his phone out for Leo to look at.

Looking at the screen Leo saw that Finn had typed out his name into a google search but rather than links to his various social media accounts the first result that Finn had clicked on was a digital copy of his hometown newspaper. Leo’s blood ran cold as his eyes took in the headline he had tried to scrub from his mind back when he first saw it, the hollow words that could never actually make people understand the pain he felt that night.

Fatal Crash Claims Over 30 Lives Leaving Only One Survivor

Leo sucked in a shaky breath as Finn's phone slipped out of his lax grip, “I…” he pulled his legs in close to himself and wrapped his arms around them like he was trying to protect his heart from the cutting pain of his memories. “I… I forgot that would probably come up,” he said, voice quiet and timid, “um… it- it was a couple years ago now.”

“Hey,” Logan said, he had moved closer and was now sitting on the edge of the coffee table, “you don’t have to talk about it. If you aren’t ready yet, that’s ok,” he reached out and gently pulled one of Leo’s hands into his own.

Leo thought about that for a moment, thought about shoving it all away again, and hiding from the pain.

Sweetheart, the only way to make it hurt a little less is to start letting yourself move on. His mama’s words came back to his mind and Leo knew that it was time to move on, no more hiding no more running away, it was time to start healing.

“No,” Leo said, breathing in deep to steady his hurt bleeding heart, “I… I think it’s time. I’ve been running away from that night for so long now, it’s time I told someone. And you guys are… important to me, you should know what happened.”

Finn shifted on the couch so he was turned to watch Leo with patient eyes, Logan still had Leo’s hand wrapped in his own warm fingers gently massaging the tension from his palm. Somehow Leo was able to draw strength from them, he felt it flow into him until he felt completely safe and secure in their presence.

“It… it was a couple years back now,” Leo began, his voice was shaky; it wavered with emotion as he continued. “But, I actually used to play hockey,” Leo huffed a humorless chuckle at the surprise on Finn and Logan’s faces, “yeah, I played goalie, pretty much since the day I learned to skate. And I mean, not to toot my own horn but I was good too. Everyone said I would go on to play for the NHL, it was my dream you know?”

Finn and Logan both nodded, they knew exactly how that dream went but they stayed quiet waiting for Leo to continue.

“But, that dream got taken away. From me… and from them,” Leo choked back a sob. “We had an away game that night, just a couple hours away so the school didn’t want to pay for a hotel afterwards.”

Leo breathed in deep, he remembered the night with such crystal clarity it could have happened mere hours ago. He could still feel fatigue in his bones from a hard intense game, but the giddy adrenaline filled satisfaction of a win made it easier to deal with. The team was piling onto their bus tired but excited, Leo was grinning ear to ear as he climbed the rickety steps.

Making his way down the narrow aisle towards his spot at the back of the bus Leo caught Cody’s eyes and felt his insides squirm at the private little wink sent his way. Leo had gotten a shutout, and it felt like they were barely off the ice when Cody had pulled him by his jersey into the nearest supply closet to kiss him until Leo didn’t know which way was up, whispering promises of every filthy thing they would do together when they got home.

The bus roared to life just as Leo slung his bag up into the overhead rack and settled down onto the sticky plastic bench. The heat of the engine soaked up into his body soothing his sore muscles while the rumbling and rattling lulled him to sleep.

“We were maybe about two, three hours into the drive when-“ Leo paused a bit unsure in his story, “I guess I don’t really know. They told me a gas tanker hit us, but all I can remember was the sounds…”

Leo had no words to describe the horrible, horrible sound of metal crunching and scraping as it crumpled under impact, as it folded around the soft flesh of his teammates as easily as folding a paper crane. There are no words on earth that could describe the blood curdling screams of agony, of horror and fear echoing out from the people he loved.

“Um… anyway, I was thrown pretty hard but I was still close enough to get to the emergency exit.”

He could still feel that brief moment of weightlessness only a split second before the sharp impact as his body was tossed like a ragdoll to the opposite side of the bus, he felt it sliding, grinding against the asphalt for what seemed like an eternity before finally coming to a halt. Leo blinked against the darkness around him, his eyes were hazy and his left side was searing with pain; it felt like his arm had been ripped off.

He clutched his injured arm close, grunting in pain as he looked around trying to figure out where he was. Leo could hear people crying, screaming but his eyes were too blurry to find them. A thick fog was trying to cloud Leo’s brain as he lay amongst ripped metal and shattered window glass, he wanted to sleep, wanted to escape the horrible pain. He let his head roll back to rest against whatever hard surface he lay on, the side of the bus? The ceiling? Leo didn’t know anymore. He blinked against the fog, knowing somewhere inside him he shouldn’t fall asleep, but then he saw it. A light, it was blurry and out of focus, just like the rest of the world at that moment but it was something. His entire body flared in pain as he moved towards it crawling slowly, shards of glass digging into his palms as he finally made it to the large hole that used to be the back window of the bus.

The moment his feet hit the highway asphalt Leo collapsed, his body crumpling to the ground. He lay there for a moment panting his eyes locked onto that light that had guided him out of the wreckage just for something to hold onto.

“I’m not sure how long I was there, just staring into that light,” Leo sniffled. There were tears running down his face, Logan had threaded their fingers together and Leo was so immensely grateful for the grounding sensation of his warm palm. “Turns out it was headlights, there hadn’t been many cars out so late but a little family saw the crash and pulled over to call 911. They pulled me away from the bus,” Leo squeezed his eyes closed, and he was back staring at that light, but then there was a face blocking it out.

He didn’t recognize the person; it was too blurry, there was too much pain, but he felt their hands as they dragged him away from the remnants of the bus. It hurt, them dragging his injured body against the glass covered ground but in the very next moment that pain was completely forgotten when the world was washed in scorching heat and blinding light.

“The very last thing I remember was this loud ringing in my ears… and when I looked up there was fire, raining down around us.”

“I woke up in the hospital with a concussion and a dislocated shoulder,” Leo said through little gasps, “they told me… they told me that I was the only one to survive, it was a one in a million chance that I made it out of that wreck. They said it was a miracle, but it didn’t feel like a miracle. I lost everyone that night, anyone who hadn’t died from the initial crash… they did in the explosion. Those people, they were more than my team, they were my family. And they all died, even- even Cody.” Leo couldn’t hold back the sob, “he was my person, I thought we would spend our lives together. But he was taken away from me, all of it was taken away from me.”

“Oh Leo,” Finn gasped, there were tears streaming down his face too as he crawled across the space separating them and pulled Leo forward into his arms, “come here sweetheart.”

Logan’s hand slipped from his but settled between his shoulder blades instead as Leo let himself be pulled into Finn's embrace, he burrowed his face into the crook of his shoulder and felt the hurt flow through him. Soul shattering sobs wracked through his body as the memories of that night crashed over him again and again. After all this time of shoving it down, hiding them inside himself, he was finally letting everything out.

“You know,” Leo said sniffling into Finn's neck, “after I got out of the hospital, I felt so… lost. I’d lost my partner, my friends, the thought of getting back on the ice nearly made me sick.” Leo tightened his arms around Finn's waist, “But the worst part… the worst part was the way that people looked at me. You can’t even imagine what it feels like when the people who used to consider you a part of their family, look at you and you can see it in their eyes that they wish you were dead. They look at you and you know that in a heartbeat they would let you die just to have their son back.”

Leo pulled back from Finn's arms a bit and drew in a deep shuddering breath, “and honestly, I can’t even blame them. Cause if given the choice, I would trade my life to give them the opportunity to live theirs.” Taking a deep shuddering breath Leo squeezed his eyes closed, “even though I walked away, sometimes I think a part of me died with my brothers on the bus that night. And now I’m stuck trying to live as this broken shell of a person.”

“Le?” Leo could feel Logan’s hand soothing up and down his back, “Leo, please look at me.” Logan’s voice was soft and pleading, and as much as he simply wanted to keep his eyes squeezed closed and hide from everything the tenderness he heard there made Leo blink open to look into emerald green eyes glazed with a sheen of tears.

“I’m no good with words. But I hope I can make you understand this, Leo you are not broken . You have suffered unimaginable pain; pain that’s left scars on your heart, and those take time to heal. But those scars do not make you broken ,” Logan reached out to cup Leo’s face in his warm palms, his fingers brushing away the tear tracks running down his cheeks, “you are whole, and healing, and perfect.”

Leo felt a piece of his heart click into place at Logan’s words, he leaned out of Finns arms a bit more and pulled Logan into him holding him close letting his warm comfort soak into him soothing away just a bit of the pain. Somehow while he was surrounded by them the hurt inside lost its sharp cutting edge, it eased to a dull throb still there but easier.

“You know, you said that we’re important to you,” Finns said, his voice rough with thinly veiled emotion, “but Leo, you're important to us too. So, we’re here for you Nutty, for anything.”

Leo huffed a wet laugh through his still streaming tears, “I’m never getting rid of that nickname am I?”

Finn grinned tenderly at him, “not a chance in hell.”

Read on AO3

[itsadamcole]

graduation day pt. 3

fem!reader x finn balor

It’s Christmas now, and Finn and reader have been able to keep their relationship on the down low for four months. That is until the faculty have a Christmas party, where no one’s secrets are safe ... “i really wanna kiss you right now”

word count: 5.3k+

warnings: a former teacher/former student relationship, drinking / being drunk, jealousy, angst, smut, a little bit of public teasing, fluff

— someone wanted a part 3 and this popped up into my head so this is for whoever wanted the part 3. y’all will finally find out where finn teaches in this part .... but part 4? —

masterlist || part 1 | part 2 | part 4 | part 5 || request an imagine here

~ 18+ content below - read at your own risk ~

“Baby,” Finn whines. “Come on. It’ll be so fun. Everyone is gonna be there. Plus, you’re part of the faculty now because ya are Ver’s assistant.”

He stands in front of you in a suit with red and green Christmas themed tie and sneakers. You love Finn, but the tie he’s wearing is ugly.

You look up at Finn and say, “I don’t think I even have anything to wear, Finn. It’s so last minute. You’re literally on your way to the party.”

Your boyfriend pouts and gives you puppy dog eyes. “Please, Y/N. Pretty please. I’ll never ask ya for something again.”

You giggle and say, “We can’t even be together at the party so why should I go? It wouldn’t be much fun for me because I have maybe two teacher friends, one of which you hate because you think he flirts with me.”

Finn says, “I don’t hate him. He just better learn how to stop flirting with my girl.”

You laugh and say, “I need like forty five minutes to get ready because you caught me off guard.” You’re in your Christmas pajamas. A red cami tank top with Santa’s face on it with red and black plaid pants. Those are your pajamas.

Finn gets happy and excited that you said you were going. You walk back into your bedroom and let Finn into your apartment. You walk to your closet to find something to wear.

You call from your room, “So, is this like a formal event or can I wear a short dress?”

Finn says, “A short dress should be fine. It’s not really formal, I just didn’t know what else to wear so I put on a suit.”

You laugh as you raid your closet.

It takes a good ten minutes before you find a dress that would be acceptable for a last-minute Christmas party.

The dress is a dark red, two piece number. The top of the dress is sparkly with a halter top. The fabric on the back is completely sheer except for the line of the zipper, which runs from the collar down to the bottom of the top. The skirt is a little poofy and ends about halfway down your thighs. The waistband of the skirt is sparkly like the top. A bit of your stomach peeks out between the top and the skirt. You wear a pair of dark red heels to match the dress.

You curl your Y/H/C colored hair and do a red and silver smokey eye look for makeup. You add a little foundation, highlight, and dark red lipstick to complete the makeup look. You put in silver earrings and a silver bracelet that Finn got you for your birthday last month.

You leave your room, walking down the hallway. Finn hears you enter the living room and he smiles when he sees you. “Wow,” he says.

Your face turns a little red and you ask, “Like it?” You do a little spin and the skirt flares out a little bit.

Finn walks over to you and says, “I love it. Ya look stunning, my love.”

You look up at Finn and ask, “So what’s the plan? We can’t walk into the party together.”

He says, “I’ve thought about that. I’m going to park in my usual parking spot. Ya will get out first and I’ll be about five minutes behind ya.”

You giggle and say, “Hm. Smart. Except everyone knows your car.”

“Exactly,” he says. “So we’re taking yours. I’ll drive.”

You blink and say, “That’s also smart.”

Finn laughs and says, “I didn’t become a professor overnight. I went though college and training in Ireland and in the United States.”

You say, “You’ve never explained to me how you became a teacher. Is it different in Ireland than it is here in the States?”

He says, “Not really. I needed my Bachelor’s degree, which I got after four years. Then I had to get a basic teaching credential, which I got after 120 hours of training. I taught in Ireland for three years, until I was 25 before I decided to come over to the States to get my Master’s degree in education, then I was offered a job here once I completed my Florida teaching certificate so I stayed and have been teaching in the States for ten years this year.”

You look up at Finn as he talks. He seems so excited when he talks about going to school in Ireland before coming to the United States to teach. It makes you so happy that he gets excited to talk about his journey from Ireland to the United States.

You wait until he’s done talking before saying, “That’s amazing. It’s crazy how long you’ve been teaching for.”

Finn smiles and says, “Yeah, it is. So, shall we head to the party?”

You nod and collect your things, and by ‘things’ you really mean your clutch, your keys, and your phone.

You and Finn leave your apartment building and the cool breeze hits you.

It’s a warm night tonight in Orlando, Florida. You and Finn will make the short drive to Full Sail University, where Finn teaches and you assist.

Finn drives your car and you play on your phone as he drives. You scroll through Twitter and Instagram.

Your phone begins to ring and you see it’s your mom. Your eyes widen and say, “Crap, I never told my mom I was coming home this Christmas.” You had a flight today but didn’t make it in time, which is why Finn showed up and asked you to come to the party.

Finn glances over at your phone to see your mom calling and he says, “What’re ya gonna say to her?”

“Well I can’t tell her the truth,” you say, answering the phone. “Hey, Mom.”

Your mom says, “Hi, honey. Where are you? You should be home by now.”

You say, “Um, yeah. I missed my flight this morning so I won’t be making it home for Christmas this year.”

“I can book you another flight if you’d like,” your mother says. “It wouldn’t be an issues.”

You internally start to panic and say, “No, it’s okay. I’ll FaceTime you, dad, and Y/S/N on Christmas morning to see everyone open presents and everything.”

Your mom says, “I’ll send yours down to you so you’ll have them before Christmas. They’ll probably be in a big box so be prepared.”

You laugh and say, “Alright, Mom. I’ll talk to you later. I’m on my way to a little get together at the school.”

“Have fun,” your mom says. “Stay safe. I love you.”

You say, “I love you too, Mom.”

She hangs up and you sigh. “Not a complete lie,” Finn says, pulling into his parking spot. You laugh.

He parks the car and he looks over at you. “You’ll be coming in a few minutes?” you ask, looking over at Finn.

Finn nods and says, “I’ll be there in about five minutes.”

You nod and say, “I’ll see you in a few minutes.” He smiles and nods before you get out of the car. You walk through the parking lot to the gym area.

In your four years as a student, you’ve heard all about the faculty Christmas parties. You’ve heard all the stories of drama that have happened at these parties. You’re hoping that nothing happens this year but you’re not holding your breath.

In the past four months, you and Finn have begun a ‘friendship’ by having lunch in the cafeteria or his office. You’ve tried to stay away from him as much as you can but it’s hard when he’s one classroom over from you.

Veronica, the teacher you’ve been assisting, has kept a close eye on you since day one. She’s very suspicious of something more than just a friendship between you and Finn because of what happened day one in Finn’s office.

You walk into the gym. Faculty members are all scattered throughout and the gym is decorated with Christmas decor. There are tables are covered with red and green covered with a Christmas themed figure in the middle. Lights and garland hang throughout the rafters. Christmas music is blaring in the large room. There’s a small dance floor section. You see a minibar in the corner. So there is alcohol, which makes you happy. You’re 23 so you can drink legally.

You ask for a Coke and vodka at the minibar before you walk around, trying to find anyone you know.

That’s when one of your professor friends comes up to you. Mr. Seth Rollins. History professor.

“Hey, Y/N,” he says, drunkenly wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “I thought you were going home for the break.”

You laugh at how drunk he already is before you say, “I was, but then I missed my flight this morning. Someone convinced me to come tonight so here I am.”

Seth smiles and says, “Well, I’m glad you’re here. Come dance with me, Y/N. Have some fun."

You look up at Seth and say, "Alright. One dance."

The two of you walk to the little dance floor area. You sway to the beat of the music with your drink in your hand. Seth makes small talk with you as the two of you dance to Santa Claus Is Coming To Town by the Jackson 5.

A few minutes pass by and you decide to start looking around for Finn. Seth notices that you're distracted and he asks, "You looking for someone? Maybe a boyfriend you invited?" Your eyes shoot to Seth when he says the word 'boyfriend'. "So it is a boyfriend. Do I know him?"

You immediately jump into defense mode and say, "No, it's not a boyfriend. I'm just looking around. I haven't met half these people."

Seth says, "Don't think I haven't seen how close you and Finn Balor are. Always in the cafeteria having lunch. It's a little weird considering that you're his former student."

You stop moving and you look at Seth. You say, "I graduated in May. It's been over seven months. I had you as my history professor in my first year. That's a little weird too."

He opens his mouth to talk and he says, "I won't deny that but you're so much closer to Finn than you are to me. Plus, Finn looks at me weird when I'm around you."

Finn does think that Seth has a thing for you. You look the same way at Veronica when she's around Finn. You two get so jealous sometimes, you won't deny that fact.

"Finn looks at everyone weird," you say. "I don't know if you've noticed that."

As your eyes scan the room, you find Finn. He's standing with Veronica and one of the other English professors, Mr. Kevin Owens. You sigh. Seth looks back to see Finn talking with Veronica and Kevin before looking back at you.

Seth says, "You're either jealous or upset that he's talking to Veronica. I heard what happened when she walked into his office on the first day. You told her off and she's been upset over that for the past four months."

You say, "I'm not surprised. She's been harassing him for a while from what I understand. He's been rejecting her."

He laughs and says, "She's been after him since she got hired. The English Department head loves her. Finn's been saying no to her for years but she won't lay off him. Everyone was shocked when you of all people said something to her."

"How many people know that I said something?" you ask, looking up at Seth. 

Seth says, "A lot of people do. I think some people from all departments know what happened. It's not exactly a secret, Y/N."

You facepalm and say, "Great."

After a second, Seth says, "Oh, shit."

You look up at Seth. "What?" you ask. "What's happening?"

"Veronica is all over Finn," he says. "Kevin left and it's just the two of them. He's pushing her away from him."

You turn and look at Finn. Veronica is all over him. Kevin is walking away from them. Anger rises inside of you.

Seth says, "For someone who isn't your boyfriend, you're sure acting like he is. You look so mad, Y/N."

You look at Seth and say, "Excuse me for a second, Seth." You walk toward Finn. Your boyfriend looks over at you and says something to Veronica. She looks over at you and rolls her eyes.

Finn looks at you and says, "Y/N, nice to see ya."

"You too, Finn," you say, looking at him. "You looked like you could use some help." You look over at Veronica, glaring at her. "No offense."

She forces a smile and says, "Full offense taken."

Seth walks up beside you and asks, "Everything okay over here?"

You look at Seth then look at Finn. Veronica says, "Everything's fine. Just making polite conversation. Nothing to be worried about."

Finn is staring at Seth. In Finn's defense, Seth is standing a little too close to you for comfort.

Seth snaps his fingers and says, "Oh, Veronica, I wanted to talk to you about something so can I borrow you for a second?"

She nods and walks off with Seth. When they're out of sight, Finn takes your wrist and walks with you outside the gym. "Finn," you gasp as you walk after him. "I'm in heels. Slow down."

The two of you walk around the building and Finn looks down at you. "Why is Seth hanging around you?" he asks.

"He walked up to me," you say. "I was getting my drink and he asked me to dance. I could ask you the same question. Why is Veronica hanging around you?"

Finn says, "She walked up to me as soon as I walked into the room. It's like she was staring down the door and waiting for me to walk in. Why? Is someone jealous?" He raises his eyebrows at you.

You say, "Every chance she gets, she's all over you. I'll tell her off again, I swear to God, Finn. I will. I'll throw her across the damn room if I have to."

He laughs and says, "Stay around me tonight. I want to make sure ya don't throw her across the room."

You pout and say, "I'm not complaining about being around you but I still want to throw her across the room."

Finn leans down and pecks your lips before he says, "Relax, Y/N. Ya won't want to throw her across the room in a few minutes."

Confused, you tilt your head at Finn and ask, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"That's for me to know and for ya to find out," Finn says. "Come on. Let's head back inside before it looks suspicious that I dragged ya out here."

You nod and head back into the gym with Finn. You walk with Finn to one of the tables. He pulls out a seat for you and you sit down, scooting closer to the table with Finn's help. He sits beside you and says, "Feeling better?"

You nod again and say, "Much."

Right at that moment, Seth and Veronica walk over. Seth sits on the other side of you and Veronica sits on the other side of Finn. You sigh softly and take a large gulp of your drink.

"Everything okay?" Seth asks, seeing you take the large sip of your drink.

You say, "Everything's just peachy."

After you say that, you feel Finn's hand on your knee under the table. The red table cover hides his hand on your knee.

Finn asks, "So what did the two of you need to talk about?"

Seth replies by saying, "I was going to come by and talk about the history behind the book she's going to be assigning her class to read in a few weeks."

"What book would that be?" you ask, looking at Veronica.

She says, "The Diary of Anne Frank. We analyze that book like no tomorrow. Usually, I have one of the history professors come in and talk about the historical context behind the Holocaust and everything. Seth knew this so he asked if he could be this year's speaker."

You look at Seth and say, "Oh, really? Well, I look forward to seeing you come to class in the future."

Finn's hand slide up your thigh under it's right under your skirt. You take another sip of your drink to wash away the nerves. Finn's never touched you when you're at the school, except for the three times you've had sex in his office since graduation day last May.

Seth says, "I do as well."

You finish your drink and look at the ice in the cup. You say, "I'm going to go get another drink. I'll be right back."

You start to get up and Finn's hand slides off your thigh.

"I'll come with ya," Finn suddenly says. "I've been needing a drink myself." He stands up and walks with you to the minibar.

You ask, "What do you think you're doing, Finn? You can just put your hand on my knee like that."

Finn stands beside you at the minibar as you order another Coke and vodka. He leans down and says in your ear, "I did and I will again."

You're handed your refilled drink and look over at Finn. "You're being very touchy-feely tonight and it better stop unless you want the relationship coming out into the open."

He says, "I'm a little drunk and a little jealous that Seth can just openly flirt with ya."

"Now you know how I feel," you say, sipping your drink. "We both get a little jealous, don't we?"

Finn secretly leaves a few soft kisses to your jawline as he says, "I'll lead to some really hot, jealous sex tonight."

You giggle and say, "If you're that lucky. You won't be lucky if you keep kissing my jaw when our co-workers are around."

He smirks and says, "Touche, my love."

After the little conversation that left your core aching for Finn, you head back to the table. Clearing your throat, you sit back down.

You cross your legs under the table in case Finn gets any ideas. His hand goes back to its spot on your thigh when he's settled next to you.

You, Finn, Seth, and Veronica make small conversation.

Veronica asks, "So, Seth, have you been seeing anyone recently? Or have your eye on someone?"

Seth looks directly at you and says, "I have my eye on someone. I don't think she feels the same though."

Finn grips your thigh a bit after he slides it up a bit. You gasp and cough to cover it up. You take a sip of your drink.

"What about you, Y/N? Dating anyone or talking to anyone?" Veronica asks, eyes staring into your soul.

You say, "I'm dating someone but it's none of your business who it is."

Seth nudges me with his elbow and says, "Tell us about him. What's he like? Does he go to school here?"

You look over at Seth and say, "He's not from around here. He's from Europe. France, actually. He's home visiting his family for the holidays."

Veronica says, “Oh, wow. What’s his name?”

Quickly, a name pops into your head. “Francis Blanchet,” you say. Finn’s initials. F.B.

Finn snickers under his breath. Seth asks, “What’s so funny, Finn?”

“Nothing,” he says, pulling his phone out quickly. “Just got a funny text. That’s all.”

Veronica says, “Well, I have my eyes on someone.”

You shoot a glare as Veronica and say, “We’re all aware that you stalk Finn because you’re in love with him.”

Finn and Seth both stare at me as Veronica says, “You’re acting like you’re in love with him or something.”

I am, you think to yourself but you say out loud, “I have a boyfriend in France and Finn never told us if he was dating anyone.”

All three of you look at Finn. He looks at you and says, “I am.”

“There we go,” you say, glaring at Veronica. “Stop chasing a man who’s taken.”

Finn gets up and says, “Alright. I’m diffusing the situation before it gets too out of hand so, Y/N.” You look up at him. “Come dance with me.”

You get up and take Finn’s offered hand that he held out to you after he asked you to dance. Veronica’s jaw drops and asks, “What about me?”

“You sound like a five-year-old and you’re, what, 35?” you ask. “Grow up”

Finn walks away with you, hand in hand.

Snow in California by Ariana Grande is playing. There are a lot of pairs on the dance floor so you walk to the other side, out of sight of Seth and Veronica.

Finn takes you in his arms and you wrap your arms around his waist, both of you swaying to the music.

He’s looking down at you and you look up at him. Finn’s face is close to yours and he says, “Ya are jealous.”

You smile and say, “Maybe a little. She’s claiming you like you’re hers.”

“I’m yours, my love,” Finn says to you. “All yours. I may not show it a lot when we’re here at school but I do love ya. A lot.”

You stare up into Finn’s eyes and you say, “I really wanna kiss you right now.”

Finn’s tongue swipes over his bottom lip and he says, “I really wanna do more than just kiss ya right now. Our little conversation earlier made me a little too excited.”

You bite your lip lightly and say, “Let’s head out soon and we can go to whoever’s place is closer and you can do more than just kiss me all night long.”

He nods and says, “Ya leave in a half hour and I’ll follow behind ya after about ten minutes.”

You nod and pull yourself closer to Finn, staring up at him.

Someone clears their throat and taps you on the shoulder. You turn and see Seth Rollins. “Can I get a dance?” he asks innocently.

You look up at Finn and he has a jealous look in his eyes but he says: “Sure. Find me after, Y/N.”

He hands you over to Seth and walks off. You look up at Seth and he says, “I’m surprised that he said yes. I thought he was gonna kill me right then and there.”

You say, “He’s a little possessive of me. I mean, look around the room. I’m the youngest person in here. He just wants to make sure I’m safe.”

Seth says, “I do too, but if you were my girlfriend then I wouldn’t leave your side.”

You stare up at Seth and say, “For the last time, Finn and I aren’t-”

“Cut the bull,” he says, cutting you off. You close your mouth. “When Ver said that you were acting like you were in love with him, you muttered ‘I am’. I heard you. The way you look at him, I wish you’d look at me that way.”

Seth looks behind you and you glance behind you. Veronica is trying to kiss Finn and you look at Seth. You say, “I can’t do anything without it looking suspicious.”

Seth says, “I’ll handle it.”

He turns to walk away before you take his wrist, saying, “No. I’ll handle it. I don’t care anymore.”

You walk over to Veronica and Finn. You look at Finn and say to Veronica, “What would Finn’s girlfriend think if she found you were moving in on Finn. She's not here but imagine if she walked through that door and saw you trying to kiss her man."

Veronica looks at you before she asks, "What would your boyfriend think if you were defending Finn like you were the one dating him?"

Finn looks over at you and says, "Because she is the one dating me."

You, Seth, and Veronica all look at Finn. Finn smiles and says, "She's Finn's girlfriend." You smile when he refers to himself in the third person. "And I am head over heels for her."

He walks over to you and you stare up at him. Seth smiles behind you as Veronica says, "This is highly inappropriate. She's your former student."

"Keyword," Finn says, not looking away from me. "Former. She graduated in May, she's not my student anymore. She's just my co-worker and my girlfriend."

You giggle and say, "I am."

Finn rests his hands on my cheeks and says, "Ya said how much ya wanted to kiss me earlier. What's stopping ya now?"

You smile and say, "Nothing." Your hands fly to the back of Finn's neck and you pull him down to you. His lips crash to yours and start to move against yours. Seth claps behind you and Finn smiles against your lips.

Veronica says, "Whatever." She walks off.

Seth says, "Okay, okay. Let's not suck off each other's faces in front of everyone."

Finn pulls back and smiles down at you. You look at Seth and say, "Thanks for like not freaking out."

Seth smiles and says, “You guys are cute. I kind of suspected something day one and was waiting for the day that you guys made it public. It was also why I never made a move on Y/N even though I liked her.”

You laugh a bit and Finn says, “I think I’m starting to like ya a little more.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Seth says. “Go home and take care of that.” He motions to Finn’s hand on my butt. “I know how you two are just dying to leave so go ahead.”

Finn doesn’t waste any time in grabbing my clutch and my hand before running out the door. You laugh as you try to keep up with Finn.

***

Finn’s place is the closest to the school. He lives in a three floor Victorian house. You guess with a professors salary he can afford this on his own. You’ve been here a few times before but he likes to come to your apartment.

He parks your car in his driveway and gets out. You get out and walk into his house. Once the front door is closed, Finn’s lips connect to yours and your hands fly to his hair. You smile into the kiss and kick off your heels by the door. Finn sheds his jacket.

The two of you stumble toward the stairs. Finn’s tie comes off and you start to unbutton his shirt as you walk up the stairs.

Once up the stairs, Finn shrugs his shirt off and unzips the top of your dress. You throw the piece of clothing onto the hallway floor and Finn picks you up by your thighs.

The kiss has gotten more intense when you and Finn slip your tongues into each other’s mouths. He pins you against the hallway wall.

“Finn,” you giggle against his lips. “Your room is right upstairs.”

He says, “I can’t wait that long.”

Finn pulls off your skirt and you reach down to unbutton his jeans. He walks upstairs to the third floor and into his bedroom.

You’re dropped on the bed and he pulls off his dress pants. He kicks off his shoes before leaning down and hovering over you.

His lips are on your breasts, kissing and sucking one while his hand groping the other. You moan softly and run your fingers through Finn’s hair as he pays attention to your breasts.

You lift your hips up so your clothed core rubs against Finn’s bulge. He lets out a soft groan so you do it again. And again. Until he pins your hips to the bed.

“Relax, my love,” he says, pulling down your soaked red lace panties. “We’re gonna get there.”

You bite your lip and look up at Finn, saying, “I need you inside of me right now, Finn. Please.” Desperation is laced in your voice.

The room is dark but you know that Finn’s looking at your now fully naked body as he throws your panties to the floor. He gets himself out of his boxers and hovers back over you.

Finn pulls you close to him and kisses you. Your lips move feverishly against his as his top runs through your wet folds. You moan into the kiss.

He pushes himself into you, making you moan louder.

You love when you have sex at Finn’s house instead of your apartment because you can be as loud as you want. Your neighbors can hear you when you’re with Finn in your apartment. There’s no one around in Finn’s house.

Finn moves slowly, letting you adjust to him inside of you. You gasp and moan as he pulls back from the kiss. His lips attach to your neck and he starts thrusting harder and faster into you.

“God, Finn,” you moan, throwing your head back. “Fuck, right here.” He moves deeper into you and he grazes your g-spot with his top.

You moan loudly and your back arches off the bed. Your hands are on Finn’s back, digging your nails into his flesh.

Finn’s now kissing your jaw, panting a bit by your ear.

He mumbles, “I love you, Y/N. I love you so much.”

Finn thrusts faster and you moan, “I love you too, Finn. So much.”

The room is filled with your moans and the sound of skin slapping as Finn thrusts into you.

It takes a little bit before both of you reach your highs at the same time. You release around Finn and he releases into you. You scream Finn’s name as you climax.

Finn helps you ride out your high and kisses you messily. Both of you are breathing heavily as you come down from your highs.

He gets off of you and he says, “Come with me.” He puts on his boxers. You grab one of his shirts and put your panties on. Your legs are a little weak but you follow Finn. His hand is in yours. He pulled the blankets off the bed and he walks downstairs with you and the blankets.

“Where are we going?” you ask, walking into the living room.

Finn gets the fireplace started and you smile. He lays out the blankets in front of it and he lays down. “Come cuddle,” he says.

You giggle and lay down beside him. He wraps his arms around you and you throw your arm lazily across his waist. Your head rests on his chest and you intertwine your legs with his.

The two of you lay in front of the warm fireplace for an hour before a clock goes off.

It’s midnight. It’s Christmas Day.

Finn smiles and looks down at you. “I know we promised not to get each other anything,” he says. “But I have something for you.”

You watch as Finn gets up and grabs a little present from under his tree. The present is big enough to fit in your hand. He sits next to you and holds it out to you.

“Finn,” you say, sitting up and crossing your legs. “You didn’t have to get me anything.” You take the gift from him.

He smiles and says, “I know. Just open it.”

You smile and start to open the gift. Inside the gift wrap is a dark red velvet box. You look up at Finn and he’s smiling. Slowly, you open the box.

Inside the box is a ring with an oval diamond. You look up at Finn again and ask, “What’s this?”

Finn smiles and says, “A ring.”

“Why?” you ask as he takes the ring out of the box.

He holds it out to you and moves so he’s on one knee. Your eyes widen. “The past few months have been some of the best of my life. I love you, Y/N. More than you think. I didn’t know that when ya walked into my classroom a year ago that we’d be here. When ya came to me on graduation day and told me how ya felt, I knew that I wanted ya in my life forever. So, I’m asking ya for forever.”

You stare at the ring in Finn’s hand as he talks.

“Marry me, Y/N.”

[greekgrad07]

Okay guys, I think it’s time...

So for years the Harry Potter fandom has been fancasting these four boys as the Marauders:

Aaron Taylor-Johnson as James Potter

Ben Barnes as Sirius Black

Andrew Garfield as Remus Lupin

Jamie Bell as Peter Pettigrew

Now there are some alternatives for these fancasts but the four above are the most popular and are the ones you will probably see most often. However, it was pointed out a while ago that these actors are literally old enough to now play the adult!Marauders. Our boys have officially grown up :,(

So... I decided, why not find some more age appropriate Marauders?

Obviously the four og’s will always be the go to, but I thought it would be fun to cast them with people who fit the age range. Now, this is all just my opinion so don’t take it too siriusly (lol get it? Like Siri-? Okay, moving on).

Starting off with the legend himself, we have Noah Schnapp as James Potter:

When it comes to casting James I think it is very important to remember that Harry looks just like his father. Idk if you noticed but it’s mentioned once or twice in the books 🙃

And I mean... look at this. You can’t look me in the eyes and tell me that they don’t look alike

(also s/o to @wallowskywalker for creating and posting the pic of Noah edited as Harry Potter! I edited the scar out of the first pic to give it more of a James vibe but guys the original edit is amazing and all credit goes to them :))

Next, we have Finn Wolfhard as Sirius Black:

Yes, I know, this kid is everywhere, but look at the facts:

Finn is already often used as early year versions of Ben’s Sirius and/or Regulas, so he obviously has the Black family look.

If you really wanna see Finn as a Sirius-like character, watch The Goldfinch. His character Boris reminds me of Sirius so much and he even gives his friend in the movie, Theo, the nickname Potter because of his glasses.

Plus there is the added bonus that him and Noah are actual friends in real life and have filmed together so it wouldn’t be hard to edit them together.

Joshua Bassett as Remus Lupin:

I know y’all love this recent white boy of the month so here’s why I think he would be a good Remus.

Honestly, I had trouble trying to decide who could do our precious werewolf justice. I eventually decided on Joshua because for some reason he gives off big ‘adorable and wholesome/responsible and studious’ vibes and that’s what our Remus is all about.

(Plus, imagine him and Finn as Wolfstar 👀)

Graham Verchere as Peter Pettigrew:

When I saw this kid in Stargirl I instantly thought he gave off big Peter vibes. The energy I got from Graham’s character was very ‘I’m just happy to be here’ and I think that honestly sums up Peter. Early on in the movie there was a scene where a rat climbed onto Graham’s shoulder and that’s when I knew it was fate.

(He isn’t necessarily big like Peter was described in the book but neither is Jamie Bell so 🤷‍♀️)

Bonus:

Danielle Rose Russell as Lily Evans:

Now I know some of y’all are gonna be mad and/or confused about this one.

Again, this is just my opinion!

It took me forever to find a Lily Evans that I liked. Now I know that there are about a hundred young ginger actresses and that half of them work with Finn Wolfhard, but they just don’t fit the image of how I see Lily Evans.

I’ve always had the headcanon that Lily’s hair was more auburn red or dark red rather than just ginger, and that she had little to no freckles. I mainly think this way because it differentiates Lily from Ginny.

I also know someone is going to bring up her eyes, but if we are casting off of movie!Harry (like casting Noah as James based off of his similarities to Daniel) than her eyes match Daniel’s blue ones perfectly. I mean, it’s better than Rowling saying, “The only really important thing is that his eyes look like his mother’s eyes. So if you’re casting Lily, there needs to be a resemblance, but they don’t absolutely have to be green” and then casting a girl with brown eyes to play Lily (no hate, just facts).

Plus, Danielle already plays a witch on Legacies so why not???

Final Points:

(I’m not great at editing please don’t judge me)

(Also, all I did was photoshop the new faces onto an edit with the og fancast so s/o to whoever made the original :))

You can disagree with these, that’s totally fine. Obviously, I would never try to replace the original Marauders, they’re iconic. This was just something I thought of for fun :)

[slytherinbarnes]

Sub Rosa [18]

v. human trials

Pairing: Bellamy Blake x reader

Word Count: 4.3k

Warnings: Violence, mass murder, fighting, language, blood, death. A slightly spicy moment.

Summary: Finn goes off the rails, and you arrive just in time to witness the aftermath. 

a/n: one day late on posting this, bc yesterday was just....not the day for me, so apologies! it’s starting to get crazy for our friends in the 100, so I hope y’all are ready! the taglist for this series is open! I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!!!

previous chapter // season masterlist // series masterlist

You stoke the fire, and the flames rise a little higher, sharing their warmth. You lean back against the fallen tree behind you, turning towards the cave when you hear someone leave, smiling when your gaze falls on Bellamy. He smiles back and settles down beside you. “They’re both asleep.”

You hum in response. “Where’s Octavia?”

“Keeping watch.” He’s silent for a minute, before he reaches over and grabs your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. You look down and smile, before turning your gaze to search his face. “I really am sorry about earlier and not agreeing with you at first about Mel.”

“I think you made up for it when you lowered yourself over the side of a mountain.”

His fingers trace patterns over the back of your hand, and you close your eyes and drink in the feeling of his skin touching yours. You feel electrified, every nerve awake from his body being so close to yours. He shifts beside you and you open your eyes to find him turned towards you, facing you fully. His eyes rove over your face, mapping it, and you do the same with him, cataloging each cut and bruise from the last few days that mars his skin. 

He reaches up and brushes a bruise that darkens your cheekbone, fingers tracing over it lightly. You lean into his touch, and he whispers, “You’re so beautiful.”

You smile, melting from his words, melting beneath his gaze, and he leans forward, closing the space between you. You allow him to press his lips to yours, and his kisses are soft at first, so soft that you wonder if you’re imagining the whole thing. But when you peek one eye open and see his face close to yours, you know you aren’t dreaming. 

After a while, his kisses grow hungry, his lips pressing harder against yours. You open your mouth to catch your breath, and he uses the opportunity to slip his tongue inside your mouth. As soon as your tongues meet, a fire starts to grow within you, and your hands start to roam up to his hair, where you give a light tug, causing him to moan into your mouth. You swallow it greedily as his hands drop from your face, skating down your neck, over your back and chest, before settling on your waist. He tugs you towards him, lifting you slightly until you are sitting in his lap, straddling him, one leg on either side of him. 

His lips shift from your mouth, over your chin and down to your neck, where he latches onto the sensitive spot there. A breathy moan slips past your lips, which only seems to encourage him harder as he nips and laves over the spot. You almost let out another moan when you hear a throat clearing behind you. You and Bellamy fly apart, and you jump from his lap and stand, both of you looking embarrassed about being caught. Octavia smirks at you both and Bellamy pulls himself to his feet, stammering, “Uh, I’ll go stand watch. You two get some rest.” And he practically scurries off, leaving you and Octavia alone. She walks towards you and you hope the dark of the night hides your blush as she settles down against the log, patting the spot beside her. You lower yourself down, avoiding eye contact. “So.”

“So.”

“You and my brother.”

It’s not a question, but you answer like it is. “Yes.”

“Hm.” She doesn’t say anything else, just gazes in the direction Bellamy left in.

“It’s still new.”

She reaches out and grabs your hand. “He deserves to be happy. You deserve to be happy. And I think you're good for him, so I approve.”

You’re more pleased than you thought you’d be to hear the words, and you let out a quiet laugh. “Well, I’m glad we have your approval.”

You’re both quiet for a minute, before she tugs on your hand, and you turn towards her. “Is that why you didn’t go with Finn to find Clarke?”

“Yes and no.” She looks confused, so you add, “Honestly, I'm a little scared of Finn right now. He went a little...off the rails once we lost Clarke and the others.”

You pull your hand free from hers and push your sleeve up your arm, revealing the bruises. Octavia gasps, “Finn did that?”

“Not on purpose. But yes.” You take in a deep breath, and let it out as a sigh. “I just didn’t want to be alone with him, even if it meant finding Clarke. I’d rather be a few days late to the party and have other people with me, just in case.”

She nods in understanding, and you stifle a yawn. She laughs and motions towards the cave. “You should probably get some rest, we have a long walk ahead of us tomorrow.”

“You’re probably right.” You stand, stretching out your limbs, before you start to step away. You pause and turn towards your dark haired friend, giving her a smile. “I’m glad you’re back, Octavia.”

“Yeah, me too.”

And then you both wave goodnight before you head into the cave and settle in beside Mel and Monroe, letting sleep take you.

-

Much of the walk back to Camp Jaha consists of catching up with Octavia, and hearing all about the things she’s seen since you last saw each other at the battle at the dropship. She tells you about Lincoln and Nyko, fighting the Reapers, and the few bits of Grounder culture that Lincoln had taught her before she lost him. You take it all in with excitement, despite the sadness you have about Octavia losing Lincoln. 

It’s near midday when the terrain starts to look familiar, and the sounds of camp reach your ears. Everyone lowers their weapons and puts them away, not wanting to be seen as a threat as you burst through the treeline and out into the open, following the path to the front gates. Up ahead, you can hear Guards jumping into action, training their guns on you. You send up a silent prayer that Shumway isn’t among them. As the gate opens, the guards start to yell, “Weapons. We need your weapons!”

Bellamy and Mel pass through first, and he gives up his pistol. You and Monroe hand over the rifles, but Octavia keeps the sword strapped to her back. They don’t press her for it. Your mom jogs up to the group, ignoring you all and focusing on the injured girls. She reaches Mel first, reaching up to brush the hair from her face. “I know you. Factory station. Where are the others?”

Mel whispers back, “There are no others.”

Bellamy drops his arm from around her, and turns to your mom. “Found her a day from here. No survivors. Lots of supplies.”

“Get her to medical.”

You and Octavia step forward with Monroe, and your mom reaches out for her, taking her hand. You see a pin on her jacket glinting in the sun, but you don’t get a chance to ask her about it, because she’s already turned and heading back to medical, thinking only of the injured. You look at Bellamy, about to say something, when you hear the sound of feet thundering towards you. You turn just in time for someone to collide with you, and your mouth stretches into a grin when your eyes catch on a head of golden hair. She whispers your name, and you feel tears prick your eyes. “Clarke.”

She pulls away to look at you, and you feel your expression harden when you see the cuts and bruises all over her face, but she gives you a watery smile, making you forget. “I thought you were dead.”

You shake your head and pull her in for another hug, shocked that she’s here, shocked that she’s alive. She pulls away and gives Bellamy and Octavia equally strong hugs, all of you happy to be alive and reunited. As you watch the reunion, Raven steps up beside Clarke, crutch under her arm and brace secured over her leg. You feel a pang of sorrow in your chest and you reach forward to hug her, happy that she made it through the surgery. When you pull back, Bellamy is turning towards Clarke. “How many are with you?”

“None.” Your face falls, and you see Bellamy and Octavia’s do the same. Clarke looks behind you, and then around you, before her eyes meet yours, searching. “Where’s Finn?”

You shake your head, thinking of Finn, unhinged, looking for your twin. “Looking for you.”

Her face falls, and she thinks a moment before reaching out to grab your hand. “Mom is the Chancellor.”

“What?” 

She nods at the others, “C’mon, we need to tell her everything. We have to get to Finn and we have to get back to Mount Weather.”

Four heads whip towards her at the same time, shocked. “Mount Weather?”

“I’ll explain everything, let’s go.”

She pulls you towards the Medical tent, already talking of Mount Weather and escape plans. 

-

An hour later, you, Bellamy, and Clarke stand outside of the council’s meeting room, waiting, pacing. Clarke told them everything, about Mount Weather, and the harvesting chambers, and the Grounders. And you and Bellamy filled them in on everything you had seen and witnessed, leaving out the parts about Finn losing his mind. Because they don’t need to know right now. Because we protect our own.

Finally, when it seems like a lifetime has passed, the council exits their meeting, and you and Clarke approach your mother, expectant. Bellamy lingers behind you, still pacing. “Well?”

She turns to Clarke with an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry, sweetheart, but they’re on their own.”

Clarke shakes her head and you make a sound of protest. “What? No. You can't just cut them loose!”

She adopts the Mother Tone. “Sweetheart, we don't have the manpower to send out two separate rescue missions and protect our camp.”

“They're in trouble,” you cut in, forcing your mom to look at you. “They’re either gonna get themselves killed or they're gonna make things worse with the Grounders.”

“Who we need to get our people out of Mount Weather,” Clarke adds. 

She looks between you both, “I know you both feel this is unfair. But our priority has to be with Chancellor Kane if there is any hope for peace.”

“If you wanted peace, you shouldn't have killed the only Grounder who was gonna help us.” Your twin’s voice is hard, and she glances over at Major Byrne, who is standing nearby listening. 

“I’m sorry. The decision's been made.”

Bellamy stops pacing, and steps forward to join the conversation, jaw clenching with anger. “You’re sorry? Finn and Murphy are out there looking for Clarke with guns you gave us, and now she's home, you're just going to abandon them? If you can't spare the guards, we know the terrain, we have a map. We can do it ourselves.”

You and Clarke start nodding, agreeing with him, but she immediately shoots him down. “Absolutely not.”

“Mom-”

She cuts Clarke off, voice hitching with emotion. “I just got you both back!”

And before either of you can argue, Jackson comes running down the hall, stopping beside your mom, looking sheepish. “Abby. I’m sorry, we need you in medical.”

You glare at her and step back. “You better go.”

She appraises you, and then Clarke, picking up on both of your anger and frustration, and as her gaze bounces between the pair of you, she yells, “Byrne? No one leaves this camp.”

“Yes, ma'am.”

She gives you one last hard look before brushing past, and you grab Clarke’s hand and pull her over to Bellamy, the three of you standing close. You look at each of them, and set your jaw. “We’re leaving this camp.”

They both nod, and Clarke adds, “And we’re gonna need guns.” She steps away, “I’ll go find Raven and Octavia.”

“We’ll go get supplies. Meet at the back of the camp, behind the prison.”

And then you break apart, leaving Clarke to head towards the engineering station, while you and Bellamy search for packs and food. 

-

Less than an hour later, you and Bellamy are standing behind the prison, waiting, when Raven walks up and sets down a large duffel bag. “I scored you a couple extra clips.”

Bellamy reaches in the bag and starts pulling out weapons when Clarke jogs up to join you. “Hey. Our mom's in surgery and the team going after Kane just left. We should, too.”

Bellamy hands you a gun while he looks at your twin. “Did you find Octavia?”

“No. I found you.” You all turn at the sound of her voice, watching as she jogs closer to you. She comes to a stop beside her brother. “I’m not letting you leave here without me.”

Behind you, Clarke starts, “Octavia-”

“Finn and Murphy are headed for Lincoln's village. I’ve been there. Have you?” She turns and looks at Clarke. “Has she?”

Bellamy tips his head to the side, a smirk on his face. “You done?”

You bend down and pick up the backpack at your feet, passing it to him so he can offer it to her. She eyes it with suspicion. “What’s this?”

“Your pack.” She smirks at him and takes it, and he holds out his arm in front of him. “Lead the way.”

She steps towards the fence, and you start to follow, but Raven holds out her crutch, blocking her path. “Whoa. Not so fast, Pocahontas.”

She touches her crutch to the fence and it sparks with electricity. You turn to Bellamy, your brows lifted, and mutter, “That’s new.”

“I thought you said it was handled.”

Raven turns to Clarke. “It is.” She pulls a radio from her pocket and lifts it. “Shut her down, Wick.”

She waits a minute and then tests the fence again, and this time, there is no reaction. She smirks, “Handled.”

Octavia tosses her pack through the fence and ducks through, and you all follow, immediately heading toward the trees, using them for cover. You run through the woods for a few miles, before slowing to a walk. The sky grows darker earlier than usual, and a rumble of thunder tells you why. 

You smile when the first drop touches your skin, still just as in love with the rain as the first time you saw it, months ago, when Bellamy was still a jerk and Wells was alive. You wish he could be here to see everything now. Because despite not knowing him well, you know he was a good man. He protected you and Clarke from the truth about your mother, and your father’s death. Too bad he didn’t realize it was your fault all along. Because I’m cursed.

Bellamy pulls you from your thoughts when he reaches out to grab your hand, lacing your fingers together. “What are you thinking about?”

You shake your head, dislodging the bad memories, only focusing on the good as you smile at him. “The first thunderstorm.” You see his smile lift and you ask, “Do you remember it? After your talk with Wells?”

You see his face fall a little at the name and his smile grows sad, but he nods. “I wish he was here to see this.”

“I was just thinking the same thing.”

You both keep walking in silence, following behind Octavia and Clarke, watching the way the rain falls through the thick canopy of trees and soaks the ground below. After a while, the rain lets up, and the sky grows darker, this time with the setting sun. You shiver a little as night falls and the air grows cooler. Bellamy drops your hand to shrug off his jacket and drape it over your shoulders, and you push your arms through the sleeves, smiling in appreciation. He looks around before turning to you. “I think we should stop for the night, get some rest.”

You smirk, “Whatever the hell you want.”

He laughs, surprised, before calling ahead to the others and relaying the message. They both agree, and soon you have a makeshift camp, complete with a fire. After everyone has eaten, Octavia is the first to lay down, already fast asleep before her head hits her makeshift pillow. You see Bellamy’s lids drop, and you fight back a smile. “I’ll keep watch.”

“No, I’m-”

You cut him off, “Bellamy, seriously. I’ve got it.”

“Wake me up in a few hours, and I’ll take over.”

“I will.”

He lays down beside a log, facing the fire, and you watch him drift off to sleep. Clarke leans against you, watching the fire. You sit in silence for a long while, enjoying each other's presence when you suddenly remember. “Oh.”

You pull up your sleeve, revealing the watch, and take it off your wrist, before reaching out to grab Clarke’s arm. She lets you take it and reattach the watch, now with its rightful owner and situated beside her bracelet. Your brows lift when you see it. “Mom gave it back to you?”

“Yeah, right after she stitched me up. They took her necklace too, because when I woke up, it was gone.”

“We didn’t see it with the bracelet or the watch.”

She nods, before she suddenly sits up and turns to you. “Earlier, when you were telling Mom about Finn and the Grounder you kidnapped, I felt like you were leaving something out.”

“I was.” She looks at you, expectant, and you let out a sigh. “He killed the Grounder. We were all arguing about what to do with him, when Finn just picked up his gun and executed him like it was nothing. Then he walked away, acting like he hadn’t just killed a man in cold blood.”

“That doesn’t sound like Finn.”

“It doesn’t. But losing you, and the others, the war… It changed him, Clarke. He’s not the same peacekeeping Spacewalker that we met on that first day.”

She turns away from you, glancing over the fire and out into the woods around you. “We’ve all changed.”

You shake your head, “Not like this.”

She says nothing, thinking it over and you both resume your earlier silence before she eventually lays down beside you. “I’m gonna get some sleep.”

“Goodnight stars.”

“Goodnight moon.”

Her eyes slide closed and you stay on watch for a couple of hours, scanning the woods around the camp for any signs of danger. You start to consider waking Bellamy soon, from boredom or lack of attention, you don’t know, but as usual, he beats you to the punch, and is already awake when you swing your gaze towards him. He lifts his gun and stands, motioning for you to take his place. You nod in thanks and lay down, shifting his pack around a few times until you get comfortable, before sleep takes you quickly.

-

Your eyes slide open slowly, greeted by a fire, brain working to remember where you are. It comes back to you in a flood, and you shift your gaze up, locking eyes with Bellamy across the blaze. His eyes drop away, and you swear you see a tinge of pink across his cheeks when you sit up, stretching your limbs out and to the sky, shaking the sleep from them. You couldn’t have gotten more than a few hours of sleep, but it feels like enough, your body finally learning to adapt and work with less. 

You stand and walk over to Bellamy’s log, dropping down beside him, before leaning back to look at the stars. His gaze follows yours, and he’s quiet for a minute, before he lets out a short hum. “Hm.”

You turn to look at him. “What?”

“Do you remember when you told me the story about Orion? How he was killed by his lover Artemis because her twin challenged her, and then she put him in the stars because she felt so bad about it?”

“Yes.”

He turns to you, fighting back a smile. “You weren’t trying to warn me or something, were you?”

You let out a quiet laugh, surprised, before hitting him lightly on the arm. “No!”

He laughs too, and you marvel at the pretty sound, something he rarely lets out into the world. You’re both looking at each other, his amusement still twinkling in his eyes, when Clarke shifts on the ground beside you. You both turn to her, and she meets your gaze, starting to wake up. Bellamy watches her for a minute, and then offers, “When we got back to the dropship and no one was there, we assumed it was the Grounders.”

“Of course, you did. You couldn't have known it was the Mountain Men. No one could have.”

He shakes his head, thinking of the 47, thoughts jumping to the worst. “How long until chocolate cake turns into being hung upside down and drained for their blood?”

“I don't know, but we don't have much time.”

You look between them. “First we find Finn, then our friends in Mount Weather.”

“And Lincoln.” Your gazes all shift to Octavia, now wide awake and sitting up. “I think we've slept long enough.”

She stands and grabs her things, already walking away, and you all follow suit. You kick dirt over the fire, making sure it’s put out before you follow the others through the woods, using only the moon for light. 

-

The moon gives way to the sun, partially hidden behind clouds heavy with rain, and your group travels together mostly in silence. By the time the sun is high in the sky, it has broken free from the clouds, shining bright through the trees around you. Octavia starts to gradually speed up as the area becomes more and more familiar to her, and soon she breaks out into a run, leaving you all to catch up. 

She comes to a stop at the bottom of a small hill, gaze locking on a large white statue in front of her. Bellamy checks the map and nods in confirmation, coming to a stop beside her. “This is it. Which way to the village?”

Octavia says nothing, her gaze never leaving the statue as tears start to well up in her eyes. She whispers, voice breaking, “The Reapers came from there. I couldn't save him, Bell. I couldn't save him.”

She starts to cry and he pulls her into a hug, comforting her, as you and Clarke watch on, hearts hurting for her. You know Clarke is thinking of Finn, and you’re both thinking of your father, and you step closer together, wrapping your arm around her and pulling her close. 

You are all pulled apart when a burst of gunfire echoes through the trees nearby, and everyone takes off running, lifting their weapons as you do. Bellamy pulls ahead, but you are all right on his heels, fighting through the burn in your legs and ache in your lungs as more shots echo around the woods. You can hear screaming as you draw closer, and you feel fear tangle in your stomach and chest. 

You see Bellamy pull to a stop ahead of you, now at the edge of the forest, and the shots pause, no longer punctuating the air. You, Clarke and Octavia stop beside him, and the fear in your stomach turns to horror as soon as you see the scene before you. 

Finn stands on the other side of a fenced in pen, a group of Grounders trapped inside. All around the pen are bodies, some still moving, some dead, bleeding from a variety of gunshot wounds. Octavia runs forwards first, recognizing a few of the Grounders, and you, Clarke, and Bellamy follow at a much slower pace, shock dulling your senses and slowing you down. 

Clarke comes to a stop in front of Finn, and his face pulls into a dazed smile. He steps towards Clarke, but she steps back, keeping the distance between them. “I found you.”

She shakes her head, in horror, disbelief, shock and turns away from him, lip quivering. You can no longer ignore the sound of crying around you and you drop down to the nearest body, searching for a sign of life. When your finger fails to find a pulse, you move to the next, relieved to see the rise and fall of the woman’s chest. You search her body for injuries, finding three gunshot wounds. 

You pull your pack off your back, searching for medical supplies, when someone drops down on the other side of you. You look up and meet Murphy’s eyes, and he whispers, “Let me help.”

You nod, pull out antiseptic, tools, bandages, and direct him on how to pull out the bullets and bandage them properly, taking a page from Clarke’s book. Bellamy joins you when you move to the next body, and out of the corner of your eye, you see Octavia and Clarke doing the same, Murphy now at their sides assisting. Finn stands amongst the bodies, frozen, watching everyone move around him. 

When you finish administering first aid, you look around, watching as the Grounders care for the dead, wrapping them in cloth and then securing it with pieces of rope. You and Bellamy exchange a look before you both walk over and help them, working silently with the Grounders, attempting to clean up the mess that Finn made.

When everyone is cared for, Octavia walks over to Nyko and talks to him briefly before joining your group again. “He says we should go, before the others return.”

You all heed the warning and leave the village, alternating between walking and running back to Camp Jaha, but never stopping until you reach the inside of the camp, secured behind a wall of guards and an electric fence.

-

next chapter

[swan--writes]

Can you do a Dewey fic for Hold on by chord overstreet please ❤️

This was a good stretch of my writing muscles, and I’m glad I got to do that. I do enjoy writing about darker and/or ickier subjects, and this was a good opportunity to do that. That said, I had to dig into some difficult places for this one, many of them familiar.

If any of y’all think that this could be in any way re-traumatizing or triggering, please skip this one. I’ve listed some numbers below that you can call if you are having any suicidal thoughts, or even if you’re just going through a rough patch. Please get help if you need it. Talk to someone, this life is worth it. You are not alone, I promise.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800-273-8255

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services: 1-800-662-4357

National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI): 1-800-950-6264

Teen Line: text TEEN to 839863

Warnings: suicide attempt, blood, pills, hospital

Words: ~990

Loving and fighting, accusing, denying.

Dewey slumped into your apartment. It was mostly dark out, and he knew better than to be walking the New York City streets alone at night. Besides, he should apologize to you.

I can’t imagine a world with you gone.

He shoved his keys into his pocket and walked farther into the apartment to find you. A glance told him you weren’t in the kitchen, and when he rounded the hall corner, he couldn’t see you in your bedroom.

Your partner frowned and listened for you. He was rewarded with silence. After a few moments, though, he saw light under the bathroom door. He sighed.

“Baby?” Dewey called toward the bathroom. He knocked. “Baby, can we talk?” He leaned his forehead against the door and pressed on. “Look, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have raised my voice.” Dewey paused. “Or left. Will you open the door?”

Nothing.

Dewey swallowed his panic. He called your name.

More silence.

Now his heart started picking up in its pace. His breathing went quick and shallow. He banged on the door, but still didn’t hear a response. He called your name again, but his heart was pounding so loudly in his ears that he doubted he would hear your response if you gave one. It was so, so quiet. Dewey’s ears were ringing and pounding, ringing and pounding, ringing and pounding…

He put his shoulder to the door. Then again. Then again, harder. Again, even harder. He took a step back and gave himself a running start.

Finally, the lock gave way. Dewey saw blood, orange bottles, harsh fluorescent lighting, and you.

I pull you in to feel your heartbeat.

Can you hear me screaming? Please don’t leave me.

Later, Dewey would be surprised by the things he remembered, and by the things he didn’t. He couldn’t remember getting you out to your car, or where he’d found your keys. He wouldn’t remember how many lights he had run getting you to the hospital. All he would remember was the silence in the car. No radio, no clicking of the turn signal, no you.

For a long moment, he felt as if he were dreaming. It was a cliché, but it was true. It was so dark outside and the drive was so shockingly easy that it felt like a nightmare. The freezing sense of dread that was numbing Dewey’s entire body fit right in.

He should have been talking to you, right? Should have been begging you to stay with him, or telling you it was going to be alright, or something. But he couldn’t make a sound until he was at the emergency room, yelling for help.

Helplessly praying the light isn’t fading.

“…get her into a room and…”

“…page Dr. Albright and find me some…”

…sir? Sir!”

“No, I can’t just leave–”

“Sir you have to. Please, let us do our jobs.” The nurse held out a hand to make sure Dewey would stay behind the final set of doors, and then he was left alone. There was beeping, cheap plastic seats, acrid coffee, haggard receptionists, and him.

I don’t wanna let go.

One of the receptionists took Dewey’s information, and then asked him to sit down and wait. Dewey tried sitting for about thirty seconds, but couldn’t shake the feeling in his legs like he should be running, or hiking, or something. So he stood and paced for a while. People were staring at him. He paid them no mind.

I know I’m not that strong.

He should have known. You and he had been fighting so much lately – more than you ever had. You had been together for years; he should have known you well enough by now to know that something was wrong. He couldn’t even remember what you were fighting about today, but it had to have been something stupid. You had started it, he knew that much. You had been pushing him further and further away, until finally he had walked out.

And fuck, it was selfish, but if you didn’t pull through this he would never forgive himself.

I just wanna take you home.

Dewey loved you more than he had ever thought he would love anybody. He could feel it everywhere in his body. Loving you was like tattoo pain. Like a flash flood three blocks away from home. He felt you everywhere, whether you were with him or lying on a table in a hospital room. He had no idea what the doctors were doing to you, but he could swear that whatever it was, they were doing it to him too. It hurt.

He just wanted to bring you home. He wanted to go to bed early and sleep in late, wake up with his arms around you, and maybe sleep some more. He wanted his face pressed against your hair. He wanted one more fight with you, because if you were fighting, you were…you were alive. Dewey would give anything to hear you yelling at him again.

But all Dewey could do was drop into a chair, pull his hoodie over his – he was sure – chaotic hair, and wait.

“Mr. Finn?” Dewey’s head shot up, and he immediately stood to meet the nurse who had called him.

“Yes?”

The nurse talked at him for a few moments, and Dewey hardly heard a word he said. After those few moments were up, Dewey was following him through a set of doors, down a hall to the left, down a shorter hall to the right, and into a dimly lit room with pink curtains.

Hold on, I still want you.

For another minute, the nurse was speaking again. Eventually, though, he seemed to realize Dewey wasn’t listening to a word. So the nurse squeezed his arm gently and left.

Come back, I still need you.

Dewey sat down beside your hospital bed. He rested his hand on yours. Then it was just him, the steady beeping of your heart monitor, the faint scent of sanitizer, and you.

.

.

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[whump-tr0pes]

Honor Bound 2 - 70

This is a series. Start here, continued from here.

This is a sequel to Honor Bound. 

AO3

Cw:  dissoci@tion (kinda the point of the whole chapter), noncon mention, thoughts of death

Note: so... some of y’all picked up on the fact that Leo left his knife in Finn’s cell... that was honestly an oopsie by me. I forgot about it, and it isn’t part of the plan. It’ll be fixed in editing lol. Good eye!!

-

“Tori?”

Tori jerked. Her eyes suddenly focused. Vera was on her knees in front of her, her eyebrows pulled together in concern. Tori shuddered and licked her lips.

“Yeah?” Tori croaked.

Vera’s mouth twisted. “Where’d you just go?”

“Um…” Tori cleared her throat. Nowhere. I went nowhere, because today I found a place inside me where I can go and no one can follow, not even the collar. She slipped towards it again, like ice melting, like butter sliding down a pan. Easy. Almost effortless. Her eyes slid shut, and she took a step to the side of her body.

“F-fuck,” Vera whispered, and Tori’s eyes flew open again, the sound silent and yet echoing through her mind.

“What?” Tori croaked. “I’m—”

“You’re leaving,” Vera whispered.

I am? I’m just going away. It’s no big deal. It hurts. I don’t want to stay.

“Um…”

Vera sucked in a deep breath and sat back on her heels. “Okay,” she whispered. “Okay okay okay okay okay…” She rocked forward and backward, pushing out slow breaths between her lips. “Okay. Okay. That’s okay.”

Tori rolled her eyes, her body wavering between real and not, between here and there… “It’s not a big deal,” Tori said flatly.

Vera froze and fixed Tori with a stare. It was the realest Tori’d felt all day.

“It’s not a big deal?” Vera said, terror simmering just below the forced calm. “It’s a big deal,” she said softly. “This is a big deal.”

Tori shrugged. The chain attached to her c—

NO.

The chain attached to her rattled a little. “It doesn’t hurt so much now.”

Vera’s eyes filled with tears. “I…” She cleared her throat. “I, um…” Her head dipped forward and she stared at the floor. “I don’t want you to hurt,” she finally managed.

“Good.” Tori wasn’t sure what she meant by that. But it didn’t matter, none of this mattered. It was just bullshit.

It’s just pain.

“T-Tori, I…” Vera stated at Tori, beseeching. “Please, can I… can I touch you?”

Tori shrugged again. She wasn’t sure how, she wasn’t exactly at the wheel anymore, but it happened. “Sure,” she said flatly. She didn’t move.

Vera crawled forward until the chain around her col—

NO.

Until the chain attached to her pulled tight. “Tori,” Vera said gently, as if she was straining not to scream, “Can you come a little closer?”

“Sure,” Tori said in a dry monotone. “Whatever you want.”

Vera flinched, and for a moment Tori felt guilty. I don’t need to be such an asshole. It’s not her fault. I just don’t want to be around. Tori crawled forward until the coll—

NO NO NO.

Tori crawled forward until she couldn’t anymore. She slumped to her side, then just kept going until she was stretched out on the floor. Standing beside herself. Looking down at herself with a completely detached sort of curiosity.

She felt fingers in her hair, so far away it was almost like she was imagining it. Like she was remembering a dream of it. She let her eyes slide closed and sighed.

“There you go,” Vera crooned. “Come back to me. It’s okay. There’s no pain here right now.”

“I’d rather not,” Tori said softly. “I’m okay like this.”

A sniffle. “Okay. But… Tori, it’s…” A slight, sharp intake of breath. Of shame, maybe. Tori couldn’t tell. She took in a breath. I don’t know if it matters why.

Nothing fucking matters. I’m just glad I don’t hurt. Numb is good.

“T-Tori,” Vera murmured. Tori thought about raising her head to look at Vera. Something about the tone of Vera’s voice tickled something in the back of Tori’s mind. “Tori,” Vera said again, her voice a little more stable. “It’s… it’s okay for you to go away when he’s… um…” The sound of Vera swallowing filled the cell for a moment. “It’s, um, okay for you to go. But when he’s not hurting you, you need to… um… come back. You need to find your way back between the pain or eventually you don’t come back at all.”

“That’s fine,” Tori said, her voice brittle and flat. “That’s totally fine with me.”

A sob. “Tori…” The sound of chains rattling. “Tori… please…”

The hand in her hair pressed deeper, massaged her scalp, ran fingernails through her hair and over her skin. It felt… good.

No. Don’t bring me back with that. Tori shuddered.

“Don’t,” Tori ground out between clenched teeth. “Don’t.”

The hand immediately withdrew. “I’m sorry,” Vera whispered. “I’m just… Tori, please…”

Something welled up inside Tori, something she didn’t want to feel. She couldn’t. She slipped a little further down. “No,” she whimpered. “Please… Vera, don’t… Don’t bring me back, please…”

“I have to, babe,” Vera rasped. “I have to.”

“Why?” Tori sobbed, and pressed her face into the concrete floor. She felt pressure, but not the sensation of the concrete on her skin. She grabbed the feeling with both hands and shoved it down where all the pain went, deep inside her chest, so she could float without it.

“B-because…” For the first time, Tori looked up at Vera. Her lips were quivering. Tears ran freely down her face.

Something deep inside Tori cracked, moved just a little. Oh, no. That’s where the pain lives. Please, Vera, please don’t bring it back.

“…because I love you, babe,” Vera whispered. “And I don’t want to leave you where you are. I want to bring you back to me, so I don’t lose you.”

“I never fully understood why you went away,” Tori said softly, staring blankly at the floor a few inches away from her face. “Like, I understood the memories would come back and you’d get lost in those, but I never fully got why you just… left.” Tori laughed once, a broken sound. “Now I do. It’s easier here. It’s much, much easier.”

“Oh my god,” Vera breathed. Tori’s gaze flicked up to Vera. Vera sagged forward, pressing her face into her hands. Something stirred in Tori again, something she used to feel. Maybe a week ago, maybe a lifetime ago. She wasn’t sure, and it didn’t matter. She wasn’t sure what it was, but it felt like… like a thread, stretched from Tori’s heart to Vera’s, pulling so tight it hurt. All Tori wanted to do was cut the thread. Why can’t I just stay here without people trying to pull me back? Gavin doesn’t like me to dissociate either. Why can’t people just leave me alone to go where the pain isn’t?

“Tori,” Vera ventured quietly, “There’s no pain here. You’re not being tor—” Vera cut off with a choke. “You’re not being, um… put in, in pain, so… can you please… just…” Vera’s hand lurched forward and she snatched it back, biting her lip. “Can you please just come back? Just for a minute. And then if you… if it’s too much, you can… you can go.”

Tori sighed. “Promise?”

“Yes,” Vera whimpered. “I… I promise.”

Tori cowered against the floor, momentarily overwhelmed with a bone-crushing dread. No. Oh, no, I can’t go where the pain is, I don’t want to, please, please no, please don’t make me…

“Can I touch you?” Vera murmured.

“Yeah,” came the choked reply.

Vera slid her hand into Tori’s. Tori gripped her like her life depended on it, her intention suddenly flowing back into that arm, into that hand. Hold on to Vera. She told her body that, and it obeyed.

Breathe. I have to tell my body to breathe now.

She did, in and out, slowly, so slowly, coming out from underneath the blanket of nothing she’d been nestled under. It was bright, it was so fucking bright in here, in her body. The fluorescent lights and their constant hummmmm over her head threatened to break her, to drive her completely fucking insane.

And her neck hurt. Jesus fucking Christ, it hurt. It ached with every breath, burned with every single movement she made. The muscles in her neck spasmed and shuddered against where the coll—

NO PLEASE.

Have to be good for Vera.

Have to come back.

Collar. There’s a collar around my neck.

“There you go, Tori,” Vera said softly next to her. “There you go. Come back to me. I know it hurts.”

Someone’s sobs were echoing off the walls. Tori wished it would stop, the sounds were driving nails into her head. It’s not their fault if they’re crying. Isaac’s being raped, Sam’s being passed around like everyone’s personal punching bag, Finn has to watch us fall apart and now they know before they die, Leo’s going to rape them, too. I can’t blame them from crying. I just wish they would stop.

“You’re okay,” Vera soothed. Tori tried to tell her she was fine, that she didn’t need her help, but someone was just fucking crying. It wouldn’t stop. Her chest hurt and her face was wet and she couldn’t stop shaking but god please please please make the crying stop.

“Breathe…”

“I AM BREATHING!” Tori shrieked, lurching upright, clumsy in her body still. Vera flinched back. “Ahh, fuck…” Tori wobbled and fell back onto her side, clutching her head in her hands. Her fingers tangled in her hair and she pulled, so hard she could almost feel the strands break. She panted, hard, every exhale coming out as a sob.

“Oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god OH GOD FUCK!” Tori’s body was wracked with pain, shuddering waves of it breaking over her over and over and over until she felt like she might be sick. Her bones ached, her muscles twinged from the shocks pushed through her body at Gavin’s command. Her throat hurt, her throat burned, raw skin where the prongs sat tight against her throat, and pain with every turn of her head. Her body was pain, and nothing else.

“Tori, it’s okay, it’s okay,” Vera urged beside her. “I’m right here. I’ll help you through it. Okay? I know it hurts. I—” Vera choked out a sob. “I know. But I’m right here. Hold onto me if you need to.”

Tori’s hand shot out blindly, feeling for Vera, for an anchor, anything to remind her there was something in the world that wasn’t pain.

Something in the world that wasn’t pain, and rage.

“Fuck Gavin,” Tori whispered through vocal cords that felt scraped raw. “Fuck Gavin, fuck Gavin. He does this to us. He… he hurts us, he rapes Isaac, then he sleeps in his fucking bed and eats his mother’s fucking food and he gets to wander around and he doesn’t get to wear a collar and he doesn’t do anything to help us fuck him so fucking much, I hate him, I hate him, Vera…” Tori turned her gaze up to Vera, eyes wide and red with crying. “Can you kill him?” she whispered desperately.

Vera’s eyes fell shut and she dragged in a noisy breath. “Tori…”

“Please.” Tori clutched at Vera’s hands. “Can you kill him? Please. Next time he t-takes us… Please, Vera, please, just kill him so he can’t hurt me anymore.”

Vera bit her lip. “Tori, I… I can’t… He’s our only chance to get out of here. Our only chance. We just have to wait until his… mom…” Vera sobbed and pressed her face against her arm, her hands still clutching Tori’s.

“But… Vera, please, I don’t want to wait, I don’t want to, I don’t want to hurt, Vera, please…”

“Tori.” Tori’s heart sank at the tone of Vera’s voice. “I can’t. It’s not his fault. He’s trapped, too. You think he likes this? You think he likes hurting us?”

“He did before,” Tori said weakly. “When he put a co— a coll— when he put this on me…” Tori rested her head against the floor. “He liked it, before.”

“But he doesn’t now,” Vera said softly. “I swear, he doesn’t. I watch him. It tears him apart to hurt us. It makes him want to die, Tori. I can’t kill him. He’s going to get us out, as soon as he’s trusted.”

“I want you to kill him,” Tori whimpered against the floor.

“Tori…” Vera’s lips quivered. “He’s… he’s our family.”

“I’m your family,” Tori whispered. “He… he hurts me, Vera. Over and over and over…”

“I know,” Vera said, her voice twisted in a kind of agony that touched Tori, too. “I know, babe. But… I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I know it’s unfair to ask you to take this, but… I would take it all myself, I would, please, babe…”

“I know you would,” Tori whimpered.

“So… Vera sobbed. “Please, Tori, please… I… It fucking kills me to ask you this but… please… hold on just… a little longer, please… He’ll get us out. I know he will.”

“How do you know?” wailed Tori. The sound echoed through the cell.

Vera shivered, then swallowed hard, forcing something down as she looked at Tori. “Because…” Vera said softly, “She stopped calling him Gavin Stormbeck. Now she just calls him Gavin. She doesn’t need to remind him of who he is anymore. She thinks he already knows.”

Continued here

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[frecklesandfanfics]

7x12

It’s late on Thursday but it’s still Thursday and thus time for thoughts you didn’t ask for but I’m sharing anyway, and I have a lot of feelings so let’s get right down to it: (yoooooo this is the longest of these I’ve ever done but I had to get all the details of their fight in there)

Murphy and Emori kneeling right away obviously, bless their little cockroach hearts.

Quite the fashionable little eyepatch Sheidheda whipped up since we last saw him, and from what animal did he get these spikes on his shoulders?

I actually really liked Nelson--or at least Lee Madjoub who plays him--so I’m a little sad this is his end but at least he lived and died by his principles which is more than some people on this show get to do.

Bellamy looks like a goddamn fool in this white outfit but Gabriel is clearly digging it.

I absolutely despise Just-Call-Me-Bill and his cavalier fucking attitude towards his own fucking son.

Raven is ready to draaaaaaaag Bellamy. I love her anger and refusal to comply. And he lets them take her away! They’ve been family since the dropship days--he held her as Finn died--they lived on The Ring together for six years--“So much for family,” indeed.

Echo is absolutely roasting him. I love her. A lot. She is so right--she absolutely went through all of those things, never truly breaking even though she came close. (What’s a little attempted genocide between friends?)  And here he is, three months on Etherea and a whole wreck. Her line, “Watch us all die, I suppose,” is perfect. Bellamy’s “yes” to “is it more important than us?” is absolutely devastating. And with that, they’re broken up. It hurt more than I thought it would. 

ALSO how is “all of us for all mankind” any different from Octavia’s cannibalism motto in the bunker? Remember how you loathed her for that, Bellamy?

Knight’s really out here with all the exposition--and I wonder how long Nikki Bang Bang is going to put up with being called “Convict.”

Alright, Emori and Murphy’s ragtag band of fugitives is doing okay! Murphy, you literally only have to survive til the end of the episode bb. You can do it. And with that these two little horndogs lay down together to make some babies...only to be interrupted by Indra with Madi’s boyfriend.

Does a nuclear reactor count as a weapon? Well I hope fucking not since people live on this planet...including you.

Nikki is really on my last nerve. Thanks Emori--why don’t y’all just shoot her in the head, though?

Aw. Jordan and Hope. Please be best friends, Hope needs a wholesome influence. Jordan’s point about how the group are not their friends, but their parents’ friends, is so solid. I can’t imagine how alienated these two must feel. I love that all of these space people force Hope into hugs and comfort her--she doesn’t know how to show or receive affection so they just make her. This poor child. I know people have been hard on Hope across the fandom but I honestly feel so much empathy for her. 

Clarke and Octavia! My favorite female duo. This moment of bonding and understanding between them is everything I have wanted for seven fucking years. 

I love the way this scene is directed, the way they move, everything, all the details:

Clarke immediately gets in Bellamy’s face, but Octavia stands back. Feels like she knows that Clarke is the right person to handle Bellamy.

Dude. Your “experience” sounds like some kind of acid trip. 

Then Octavia steps forward, and Clarke steps back. 

Clarke forward again, with tears, her voice breaking.

Bellamy is breaking too, tears, everything, Clarke forward and in his face again. Clarke refuses to help and gives her normal reasoning for everything she does--she was trying to save her friends. Bellamy, with tears: I am trying to save YOU! (all of you but really just you clarke i mean c’mon) His threat to Clarke--if you don’t tell me where the key is--the threat hangs, Clarke shakes her head, he lays down the truth. “They will kill you. All of you. Let me help.” and her face is so angry, disgusted, disappointed, defiant--go float yourself. When she walks away he closes his eyes like he’s trying to keep the tears from falling. Clarke walks over to Octavia and when they take each other’s hands lemme tell y’all I BAWLED. Sisters. Equals. After all this time. 

Conductor Doucette (Steve to his friends) walks up to console this idiot with some speech about transcendence. I hate him. But he sure does look hot with this haircut. 

Every Memori scene is absolutely killer. “You think Hatch would have kneeled?” Also “Raven, in one of her more questionable moments, that I nevertheless respect...” Oh god, I love him. 

The looks between Cadogan-Bellamy-Doucette while Clarke is in the MCAP are so good. 

Bellamy: “It didn’t have to be like this.” Clarke, with tears running down her face: “Yes it did.”  I have a lot of questions about these lines. They could be read in a lot of different ways. Does Clarke mean that she would always have fought this hard, regardless of it being Bellamy she has to fight against? Does she mean that Bellamy’s decisions would have always brought them to this point? 

I am asking once again: what the fuck is Sheidheda wearing? And who had time to make this absolutely ridiculous and a bit too on-the-nose throne of bones?

Oh good, now when Clarke and Call-Me-Bill come through the anomaly stone they’ll be right in front of Sheidheda’s Mad Max insanity.

Madi is being such a precious fucking bean right now telling them all how she feels their pain. I cannot. I am dead. Also Emori being proud of Madi is EVERYTHING. ALSO Murphy’s “I’ve got this,” to a terrified Emori made my heart clench.

Miller’s “You good with this?” to Clarke touched my heart tbh. Everyone’s loyalty to her this season is everything I have needed for ages. 

Hm. Where did this asshole send everyone? I love the way Clarke immediately rounded on Bellamy. He won’t be able to make a right move in her eyes until this shit is over. 

I barked with laughter at “Your move, my liege.” And Murphy’s little grin when he sees Clarke! Cockroachkru forever!

Y’all, that was...a lot. Like a lot a lot.

In short: Becho breaks, Bellarke fights, and Memori tries to make babies at every turn. Sheidheda is a fashion icon (of sorts) a new ship launches with Hope and Jordan, Madi becomes leader of a new generation of delinquents, and Nikki Bang Bang gets the knock upside the head that she so deserves.

[plainvanillapotato]

the 100 diaries S1 E12

quarantine diaries: may 26 2020

season 1 episode 12: “We Are Grounders: Part I”

🎶“we are [grounders] bum ba dum bum bum bum bum”🎶...i cant be the only one. don’t lie to me like that. you thought it too huh?

“look inside. find your peace” - jaha (1:45) spittin some uncle iroh wise talk here. while also being like YOLO. live it up bitches cuz we all gone die. 

wait did he say commander. so anya isn’t top dog. please tell me my killmonger theory is right. cuz if so this will officially become the best show ever!

haha they really expect me to believe that they killed finn off screen. bitch i think not

what is this star wars? with this chain? clarke is no princess leia.

murphy. big yikes. he’s killing more of the 100 than the grounders. and jasper is just like cool. cool. cool. cool. trying to pretend that he didn’t just see murphy straight up murder that guy

there is no way that these smucks are going to win against the grounders. with this internal conflict. i think not.

this really just turned into a hostage situation. how would have thought. not me. this show constantly just throws in these random situations and i love it. but murphys character just keeps getting worse the more i watch. murphy just stop. just fucking stop it.

waht the hell is that hose clarke is riding. it kinda looks like a thestral to me just minus the wings

plot armor is strong with finn. but i shouldnt be surprised considering that its apparently going to be a wild ride with finns character development

licoln!!! how do these grounders still trust lincoln? also i wish we saw from licolns POV trying to save finn cuz that had to have been epic. did he really all do this for octavia tho? man is whipped for octavia. but is she worth it tho. what does she bring to the table? ***yeah yeah yeah i know that he doing because “what his people are doing to there people is wrong” or whatever but really tho we know this is all for octavia’s pussy.

a mine or is this the cave to two lovers. because i really here for it.

wow is there a slight hint of a romance between abby and jackson. ok cougar. if anyone is questioning me on they’re little heart to heart scene starts on 14:40 and by the end of if jackson is really up in abby’s personal space. plus they might as well because yolo

jasper is not worth trading in prettyboy bellamy.  

“you people are so soft”- lincoln (20:50) and i agree these spacers are gonna get absolutely destroyed by the grounders. like they can’t even keep the peace within their own people. fucking murphy.

honestly bellamy has a lot of faith in raven and jasper to save him during this hostage situation. i could never. 

without bellamy or clakre. the 100 are dead cuz they really didn’t give any characteristics to any of the the other kids in the 100

“we can make bomb.” jasper has its priorities straight. nooo save bellamy first then we can talk bombs.

aaw murphy just wants empathy. **gag** murphy is emo boi went wrong

that cute little family video with clark and wells. giving jaha nostalgia and ideas of how to save his people. but imagine if these to be in modern times. ppl would really be rewatching old vines and tiktoks

headcanon for murphy: murphy is definitely into BDSM. he is waaay too into hanging bellamy to convince me otherwise.

reapers?! bro y’all better get outta there. they look like straight up savages. yeah dont fuck with them

i dont know lincoln that well but this seem a little OOC for him. like really all this is for octavia??? she really that good in bed that youre willing to help her friends against these terrifying motherfucking savages and your girl isn’t even here to see this all happen. hmmmm.. also lets all remember the time that lincoln stabbed finn. now they’re best buds i guess. but at the same time clarke and finn are a little too okay with sending lincoln to his death 

mario cart with a dead but also alive body...this better be important and not just some random plot point that they just threw in here for the ‘wtf is happening’ asthestic but that is never explained

ooo kill’em finn. really resourceful with that rock. no gun. no problem. honestly tho. this show talks a lot about guns but then majority of the deaths we see are not gun related at all. im thinking rn and i cannot come with a single character that has died by a gun shot yet.....

bellamy nooo.. i know he as plot armor but i really don’t wanna see my boy be hanging like that

these guns running out of bullets is a big trope in the show. and im tried of it. 

“i swear to god, the more we learn about this place, the less we know”- clarke (33:57) gurl same. literally when i think i know where his show is going bam! explosion. bam! weird plot point. bam! you thought this character was dead.. sike bam! bam! bam!

finn said “i love you im in love with you.” (34:42) what a time to proclaim your love right after killing a reaper. also its been what less than a month? 90 day fiance who? big ed who? im sorry i keep linking finn with big ed but  the two really be sharing similar hair cuts

the hug between bellamy and jasper my heart. the bromance!! but lets go find monty please!! bring my boy home!!

i just love how during bellamy’s big speech finn was like im thirsty and just grabbed some water. (you don’t believe me do you. timestamp is 37:30. yep i got the receipts) but dude same. i truly wonder tho if that was written in the script of if finn’s actor just took creative freedom. maybe it was done to parallel the fact that finn is thirsty boi wanting raven and clarke at the same time.

reminder: stay hydrated. this is a psa to if you are reading this you are obligated to drink some water. **Cheers to our thirsty boi finn!!

Clarke really be here overriding bellamy’s little speech i love how she started on the high note pretending to agree with bellamy then was like actually tho i disagree. we need to go

these adults/parents are really as chaotic as their kids with this plan of using the ark. 

[omg-im-such-a-masochist]

A HIGH PRICE TO PAY

Prompt: When Y/N pranked Finn for his birthday,she could never have imagined that a certain Prince would appear to collect the debt of her bad behavior.

Word count: Long-ish

Pairing: Prince Devitt(Finn Bálor) x Reader

Warnings: +18. Degradation,name calling,cursing,bondage,zapper wand(electroshock),masturbation(female),slight chocking.

@ziasaph I hope I can make you proud sis

Notes: What can I say? I love me some Fergal Devitt hahahahahaha,this man does things to me y’all...Alright my loved ones you know the drill,sorry for misspellings,english isn’t my first language (bla bla bla),check out my other stories if you’d like to(it would make your girl here very happy 😊) and if you’re comfortable with it,please let me know what you think? Some feedback is always welcomed and appreciated ❤️You can check out my other stories typing ‘masochist writes’ on the search bar on my page and my newest story as a fixed post.Okay,now let’s get to the fun part,shall we? Hope you’ll enjoy 😉

Tsc,tsc

*Oh no,I know that sound,and I don’t like it even one bit* I thought

“What’s the matter my reckless little fuck toy?Are ya scared?” He deeply chuckled,before continue “Ya thought it was funny when ya pranked me!Now it’s not so funny anymore huh?”

“I knew that stupid shock pen prank was going to come back and bite me in the ass!” I whispered to myself,while tightly tied up to the Saint Andrew’s cross.

“And you’re right about that my brat little girl,but if I would have to say it, I wouldn’t use the word ‘bite’ ya in the arse... I would go for something more accurate,like ‘shock’ “ He touched my ass with the zapper and I jumped and gasped loud at both the surprise of the action and the slight pinch due to the electroshock. He laughed out loud,amused with his own action.

“Ya should’ve known better than to disrespect your Prince like that! I think it’s so funny how ya thought that your little bratty behavior would have no consequences.After all this time that you’ve been my play toy,ya should’ve known by now that it doesn’t matter how long it takes...I NEVER forget and I will ALWAYS put ya in your place.”

He proceeded to touch me with the ‘devil’s wand’ (as I like to call it) only this time,on my upper thigh.

When I pranked Finn on his birthday(precisely one month ago),he was leaving for a one month European tour with the WWE.Today’s he’s first day back home and I honestly couldn’t see this coming.I thought he had forgotten about it.Hell,I did! But one thing I could NEVER have expected was that my innocent prank would push ‘Prince Devitt’ out,and I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss that sadistic fucker! He was nothing like my sweet Finn.Devitt was a cold hearted,sadistic,sarcastic,egoistical,cocky asshole! And fuck me,I like that man,I like that man a lot!

Don’t get me wrong, I love Finn,I really do! He’s funny,smart,sweet,caring,goofy,loving man.But there was something about Devitt that fulfills all of my dirty,slutty,wet,kinky fantasies! When Finn is able to ‘bring the Prince out’ his whole energy changes,he becomes more dangerous,more cynical,his eyes become a cool shade of blue,he smells like trouble...you know that one guy your mamma warned you about? That’s what he becomes and I could die a happy woman being able to have the best of the both worlds: the gentleman and the manwhore in just one beautiful Irish man.

“I‘ve missed ya my sweet brat! It’s been too long,don’t ya think? Too long since I got to play with ya...”

Tsc tsc

“Devitt,I swear it wasn’t my intention to disrespect you.It was an innocent joke!”

“Oh c’mon now lass,I don’t believe that,and neither do ya! We both know that ya were dying to see me” He stepped closer until his face was mere inches from mine “We both know that ya were dying to have me play with ya,just the way ya like it: rough and dirty...” He pinched one of my nipples,hard enough to make me whimper. “Treat ya like my good little whore” He pinched my other nipple “My filthy little slut” He zapped me underneath one of my breasts and I gasped loudly

“Oh no,Devitt please don’t do this to me! I’m sorry my Prince,don’t punish me like this please..” He backslapped my face.I gasped again,more from the surprise slap,than from the actual pain.

“Don’t ya dare lie to me! I know and YA know that you’ve had ya fingers buried deep inside your pussy every fucking day thinking about me! Because you can’t get enough of tha Prince! I got you addicted to this dick haven’t I?” He said grabbing his hard cock through his jeans.

“Tell me,tell me what do I do to ya?Do I make ya so turned on that ya want to rub yourself everywhere like a fucking horny dog? Do I make ya so wet that ya thank God the fact ya work from home,so ya don’t have to deal with people staring at your wet pants? Did I made ya so hungry for my cock that not even your fingers can help you anymore?” His words were getting dirtier and rawer with every sentence.Working that primal need inside of me.

“Devitt..” I whispered and he got so close to me that our lips brushed together.

“You’re my favorite of them all ya know that right? Ya are my favorite,dirty,filthy,fuck hole.” He roamed one of his hands through my body and Zapped my belly with the other.

“Look at ya,so helpless..” He wrapped his fingers around my neck and applied some pressure enough to make it hard for me to breath.

“All tied up,looking so deliciously beautiful with the thing I love the most about ya at my mercy.” He stated,gliding two fingers through my wet folds.Once he felt how wet I was,he darkly laughed before saying

“See? That’s what I mean! Where else can I find such a perfect cum dumpster like ya?” He slides two fingers inside of me before continuing “My favorite toy” His fingers started moving at a agonizing slow pace. “You’re my perfect little slut,aren’t ya? Always such a filthy little girl...just for tha Prince!” He begin to finger fuck me at such a brutal pace that my mouth molded a perfect O shape.

“ ‘Oh’ what brat?” He cackled “Do ya want me to go faster?” I shake my head at a ‘no’ motion,just to have him laugh at my face and say “Well,since ya insist!” And he turned up the pace of his fingers.

I was a whimpering,whining mess.

“Please,Devitt..please can I cum? Please let me cum on your fingers?Pleaaseee?Have mercy on me..”

“Mercy on ya?Oh little pet,WE know ya didn’t want to play with me for my merciful side,right?!” He zapped my arms,breasts,thighs and ass.

“I love the power I have over ya! This face you’re making right now...this cum slut face ya make when you’re about to cum,makes me wanna fuck ya until ya can’t walk straight for a week!” He zapped the side of my hips,threw the Zapper on top of the bed and begin to rub my clit at a furious pace while his fingers mercilessly fucked me.

I was so hypersensitive from all those stimulations that I felt like I would pass out once my walls started to clench around his fingers.

“Is my lovely slut gonna cum for me?” He smiled and I could only nod in response.His lips came near my ear and he whispered

“So what are ya waiting for? Show me how much of a whore ya are.Soak my fingers,now!”

My orgasm was so intense that I lost the track of time and space, I didn’t realized he had unbounded me from the Saint Andrews cross until my knees hardly hit the ground with a loud thump. He looked down at me,deviously chuckled before saying

“And where the fuck ya think you’re going slut?” He pulled my hair so I could stand up “I’m just getting started with ya!” He smiled before tossing me onto the bed.

Oh how I’ve missed my Prince...

[calpalirwin]

Love in a Coffee Shop

Summary: Finn starts dating again.

A/N: Y’all ever get curious what Finn gets up to during all of this? Or are we all so far up Ashton’s ass that we kinda forget Finn exists? Be honest! Well, I love Finn, so we’re gonna check up on him if that’s cool.

Word Count: 2.4k

And away, and away we go!

__

“You need to go out on a date,” Vanessa said with an eye roll.

If I had a dollar… “What do you think I do?” I asked.

“Work, take care of the kids, brood, visit you mom, brood some more.” She ticked each thing off on her fingers with a playful smile,

“I do not brood,” I defended while Ashton snickered into his hand. “And for the record, I have gone on dates. They just end horribly.”

“Aw,” Vanessa pouted. “Single, hot dad thing doesn’t work?”

“Oh, it works…” I shuddered. “Too well, that’s the problem.”

“Oh, boohoo, I’m Finn, and have lots of sex. Poor thing…”

I threw one of my fries at her while Ashton coughed to cover up a louder laugh. “Again, that’s not the problem, Ness.”

“Well, what is the problem then, Mr. Therapist?” she asked me in exasperation.

“Well first it was them running for the hills when I mentioned that my ex was pregnant with my second kid. That, uh.. Didn’t really sit well with women funnily enough.”

“That makes sense. But what’s the problem now?”

“The problem now is that they start planning these futures where we have kids too and…” I shuddered again. “I love my kids. I do. But one of each is enough for me. I don’t need exactly a bajillion like you do.”

Vanessa scoffed at me in offense, crossing her arms over her chest. “Wow… how did I ever let you go?” she sighed dreamily at me with a sarcastic smirk on her lips.

Ashton’s high-pitched giggle escaped despite his best efforts which set off both the couple in the booth behind us, and Mason and Bailey. “Stop!” Ashton wheezed. “Can’t breath! Couple behind us can hear!”

I was pretty sure the couple behind us was laughing far more about the grown ass man with the boyish giggle mixing with the gleeful laughter of small children than mine and Vanessa’s actual discussion. Especially when Ashton’s plea for us to drop the conversation resulted in the couple laughing even harder.

“Well,” Vanessa pressed on. “Mason starts preschool on Monday. Maybe you’ll find a cute single mom.”

“I don’t want more kids, Ness…”

“She probably won’t either! It’ll be great!”

“Yeah, minus the combined kids we have together from our exes? Pfft, perfect! What am I thinking?”

“Well what are you gonna do? Find a woman that doesn’t want kids? Women don’t admit that. You really think they’re gonna admit that to a dude with kids? Fuck no! Women get the stigma that if they don’t want kids it automatically means they hate them.”

“Okay, well I don’t think that.”

“Yeah, but they don’t know that.”

I groaned. “Ugh, I’m just gonna get a vasectomy and call it a day. Oh, you want kids? That’s cool, I can’t. Whoops…”

“That’s not a bad idea. Considering how easy it is for men to control their own reproductive rights…”

“Yeah, yeah, this country’s fuckin’ backwards. But move with my kids to Australia and… actually…”

Vanessa snorted. “I am not moving to Australia. No offense, love,” she said, patting Ashton’s hand.

“None taken.”

~~~

“Alright, Mase, I’ll pick you up in a few hours and take you to Nana’s,” I told Mason before straightening back up to my feet. I checked my watch. Perfect. Bailey was already with my mom, Mason had been dropped off at school, and I still had a half hour to make it in to work.

“Hi, I’m Mia,” a soft voice introduced and I lifted my gaze to find a woman in a knee-length patterned dress standing in front of me with her hand extended. Soft brown hair was piled on top of her head in a perfectly messy bun, escaped strands framing a set of equally soft brown eyes hidden behind black framed glasses.

“Finn,” I replied, shaking her hand.

“Finn… I don’t recall seeing you last week.” Her pink lips frowned in concern, and rightfully so. A strange man in a room full of preschoolers was mad creepy.

“Oh, yeah, my ex brought him last week. We have split custody of uh…” I looked around trying to spot Mason in a small sea of three and four year olds. “Well, he’s here somewhere… quiet one, bout this high.” I held my hand out measuring Mason’s height against my leg.

“Mmm” she hummed in response, her frown turning into a soft smile. “Well it’s nice to meet you, Finn.”

“Nice to meet you, too, Mia.” I returned her smile. Please be the teacher, and not a mom. Please be the teacher, and not a mom.

“Well, I’ll see you later for pick up then,” she nodded.

“Yeah, I’ll be here,” I answered, watching her move towards a chair in front of where all the rugrats sat cluttered on a rug decorated with the alphabet and numbers. Yes!

~~~

“So…?” Vanessa nudged my arm from across the table.

“So, what?” I asked, feigning innocence.

She rolled her eyes. “C’mon, Finn…”

“I had the kids, Ness. Didn’t exactly go on any dates.”

“Yeah, but did you see anyone you might be interested in when you dropped Mase off at school?”

“Yeah, actually.”

“Oh, my god, who?!” Vanessa pestered, her eyes lit up with excitement. “Was it Gwen’s mom, Lydia? I think she just has the one, so that wouldn’t be too bad. And she’s so cute.”

“You act like I’m picking out a puppy… and no. Not Lydia. Mia.”

“The teacher?!” Vanessa oooed, lifting her hair up off her neck and fanning herself. “The scandal!”

“Yeah… so I’m not really sure. She’s cute. She’s great with kids. But she’s his teacher for fuck’s sake.”

“Yeah, but what if she’s one of those teachers who’s a teacher because she doesn’t want her own kids?”

“What if she’s the teacher who’s a teacher because she wants kids?” I countered.

“For a therapist, you're pretty pessimistic there, Finn,” she tsked.

I rolled my eyes. “Alright. Say you’re right.”

“I usually am.”

I rolled my eyes again. “Say you’re right,” I repeated. “She’s one of those ‘I get my fulfillment by teaching other people’s children rather than having them myself’ types. Still doesn’t change the fact that she’s Mase’s teacher. That’s not like… scandalous?” I asked, stealing her word for it and waggling my fingers ominously.

She shrugged. “Maybe. But isn’t that your guys’ business to decide that for yourselves?”

I let out my next breath in a huff, running my hands through my hair. “Maybe. But I dunno if this is a risk I can take, Ness. If I ask her out and she says no, then there’s the awkwardness of having to see her twice a day. If I ask her out and things end badly, it’s the same as if she rejects me outright, but worse because we already tried something.”

“Has it been awkward between us since we broke up?”

“What? No…”

“So there ya go. It’ll only be awkward if you make it awkward. And if things potentially being awkward is what stops you from trying in the first place… well, that’s the weakest excuse I’ve ever heard.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “I’ll think about it, alright?”

“Good enough for me!” she chirped.

~~~

I groaned as my phone rang, telling me it was Vanessa. Why was she calling me on a Sunday morning? I checked the time and groaned again. And why so early? “Yeah?” I answered with a yawn.

“Coffee shop on the corner of Fifth. Now!”

“What?”

“Mia! She’s here at the coffee shop.” By her hushed tone, I could imagine she was whispering into her phone so Mia must have been close.

“Jesus Christ, woman…”

“Are you coming or not?”

“I don’t even like coffee.”

“Then order a fuckin’ bagel for all I care. Just get down here!”

“Alright, alright…” I grumbled, pushing myself out of bed.

Ten minutes later I pushed my way into the little shop, spotting Ashton, Vanessa, and the kids chatting quietly with Mia at a table. Vanessa caught my eye, and said something that was probably “Oh, it’s Finn!” based on the way her mouth moved before waving me over.

“Hey guys,” I said once I got closer to them.

“Oh, hi!” Mia greeted with a smile. “Your little one with their mom?” she asked offhandedly, bringing attention to the fact that I hadn’t brought the kids with me.

I tilted my head to the side in confusion. Did she not know Mason was mine? “Uh, yeah. He is,” I said, reaching out to ruffle Mason’s hair whose primary focus was on his croissant and chocolate milk.

He swatted at my hand angrily before he lifted his eyes up. “Daddy!” he beamed.

Mia’s eyes went wide. “Oh! Mason’s yours! I thought…” Her gaze fluttered over to Ashton. “Oh, my, that’s embarrassing…”

I laughed, brushing it off. “Honest mistake. But yeah, he’s mine.”

Her gaze flickered over to Bailey. “Both of them?”

I nodded. “Yep.”

“Oh, now I’m really embarrassed. I can’t believe I didn’t pay attention to the fact that I’ve seen Mason all week, but not Ashton and Vanessa here. Oh, wow…” Her glasses slid down her nose as she ducked her head down, her cheeks bright pink. 

“Again, honest mistake,” I told her. “Don’t even worry about it.”

She shook her head, still wrapped up in the small mishap. “I’m, uh… gonna go get my coffee now. It was good running into you guys. Finn,” she nodded politely and excused herself to go wait in line, her arms brushing against mine as she squeezed past me. 

“Well…” Vanessa prompted.

“Well, what?”

“She didn’t say my name when she said goodbye.”

“Or mine,” Ashton added.

“Just yours. Funny.”

They were right. Why had Mia just said my name? And had she brushed into my arm as she moved past me or had I made that up?

“Finn? Finn?”

“Hmm?”

“Go order your bagel.”

“Yeah, bagel,” I nodded, hurrying to go stand in line behind Mia. It took her stepping forward to place her order for me to figure out what I was doing. “And a cinnamon raisin bagel, please,” I added, stepping forward and pulling out my wallet.

“Oh, no…” Mia stammered, shaking her head at the now thoroughly confused barista. “Just the coffee, thanks,” she reiterated, flashing her card.

“Nope. Bagel too,” I spoke again, blocking the card reader from her while I handed the poor barista some cash. “Sorry for the confusion.”

Mia’s eyes narrowed at me as the cash register clanged open and I got my change, dumping it into the tip jar. “Thank you, but that was completely unnecessary,” she told me as we stepped off to the side.

“You’re right. Probably should’ve asked first. Can I buy you a coffee sometime?”

Heat rose in her still slightly tinged cheeks. “No.”

I nodded, feeling the muscles in my jaw twitch. “Alright. No worries.”

“Because you already bought me one, so the next coffee should be on me.”

“Oh? Well, uh, I don’t actually drink coffee…”

Her lips pursed together in thought as a different barista put our items on the pick up counter. She dug around her purse, pulling out a pen and scribbling something down on the bag my bagel was in “Well dinner, then,” she amended, handing me the bag with a phone number written on it in a loopy scrawl. “Or do you only eat bagels?”

~~~

“I’m really glad you agreed to this,” I said, admiring the way the candle flickering on the table between us cast her in a soft glow. “I, uh… wasn’t sure if I was crossing a line, or something.”

“Oh, this isn’t a date. This is just me returning the favor for that coffee the other day.” Her words didn’t match up to the teasing tone and playful smile.

“Mmm, right. Maybe I’ll just have to buy you more coffees then.”

“Or pluck up the courage to ask me on a real date. Whichever is easier.”

“Would you say yes if I asked.”

“Ask me and find out.”

“Two Fridays from now. Say seven?”

“Seven,” she laughed. “Two Fridays from now? Little presumptuous of you, no?”

“Or optimistic. Whichever is easier.”

She laughed more, then sighed. “That sounds lovely…”

“I sense a ‘but’ coming…”

“However,” she said with a knowing look, and I was already in love with the way she played with words. “There’s something I should probably tell you first.”

“Oh?” I asked, trying not to let my mind take me down the rabbit hole of wildly outrageous deal breakers.

“I can’t have kids…”

“Oh?” I said again, stupidly.

She nodded slowly. “Yeah… just so you’re aware. I try to get that part done and out of the way as soon as possible. Makes it a little easier to deal with the rejection that usually follows.”

“That’s um…” I faltered and I reached for her hand. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Oh, it doesn’t bother me. I didn’t want kids even before I learned I couldn’t have them. I mean, I love children. I love my job. But having children of my own wasn’t ever something I felt I needed.”

“That’s…”

“Fucked up?” she chuckled nervously.

“Great,” I corrected.

“Really?!”

“Oh, yeah,” I nodded, with a grin. “But, I have two. That’s not a concern for you?”

“Oh, no, not at all. I’m fine with that. It’s… complicated, I guess? I don’t mind dating parents and playing a role in their children’s lives. I just biologically don’t want to be a parent.”

“That’s not complicated at all, actually. That’s…”

“Great?” she offered.

“More than great.”

~~~

“C’mon… pick up the phone, Ness,” I muttered to myself as I bounced on the balls of my feet.

“Finn?” she asked as she answered.

“SHE CAN’T HAVE KIDS!” I clapped a hand to my mouth after the outburst. I probably could have phrased that better, but I couldn’t help myself. I was fuckin’ smitten. Mia was beautiful, and smart. She was good with kids. She didn’t care that I had kids. And she couldn’t and didn’t want kids of her own! Fuck, I felt like I had hit the jackpot and I needed someone to be just as excited with me.

“And you just blurted it out to me like that?” I could imagine her eyebrows raised in question. “Finn… do better…”

“Sorry! Yep. Probably could have phrased that better. Or not told you at all… but fuck, Ness! I’m so happy! We’re going on another date in a few weeks. And just… fuck, I haven’t been this excited in a long time.”

“That’s great, Finn. I’m really happy for you.”

“Oh! You have to swear to me you won’t mention to her that I told you. She didn’t make it seem like it was a secret, but… ya know?”

“My lips are sealed. And hey, Finn?”

“Yeah?”

“I fuckin’ told ya so.”

__

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[achliegh]

Bronze

Alright, I had this wonderful idea come into my head about Clayton, honestly he deserves his own fic. So here is his version of events! Lots will tie together with Golden so I recommend you read that as well. But you don’t have to of course.

Explaining:

Before Letter is the present.

Letter is updating the lives of the people back home, of whoever wrote it mostly.

After Letter is memory.

The first few letters will be very awkward because writing letters and not being sure what to talk about and what not to talk about is hard and confusing. Stick with me! Yes, this prologue is just a letter.

TW/CW: Discussions of death, miliatry training, smut, cringy jokes, underage drinking, dumb choices, swearing, and more later on.

Beta: @walking-crisis

Some Characters belong to @lumosinlove

Chapter 1:

Riding With Private Malone

Oath

Boot Scootin Boogie ( Line Dance )

Clayton read the letter over and over with a sad smile, he didn’t want to leave but he also felt like he needed a purpose in life. Sitting around while your lovers are successful isn’t what he pictured for himself. He recently found out that both his birth-parents were in the military and felt like he should follow in their footsteps.

A lot of people he was close to didn’t agree with this. Especially Leo, he was devastated. Probably the angriest Clay has ever seen him besides from when the Sheriff or his family would mention Wyatt.

This was something Clayton had to do. He didn’t know what branch his birth-parents were in so he went with the one that he thought he would enjoy most, the Navy. To be exact, Navy Seal but he has to pass training first. Which he did with flying colours making him on the younger side of the teams. But he felt unstoppable, but he missed his friends and family so much it felt like he couldn’t breathe. He also gave his lovers code names because he was worried what might happen if someone found out he was in a poly relationship that isn’t straight.

He didn’t think people would take too well to it.

He was sitting at the dinky table set up in their tent, they were on a special assignment, he had a piece of paper and a pencil that he found under the cots. He started writing back when his superior officer of their team came in. He was friendly and a good guy but a little aggressive at times. Great leader for the US military.

“Whatcha writing Stinky?” He walks over to take a peek at Clay's letter humming a song that constantly plays on their old satellite radio, Riding With Private Malone, and frowns. “Clay.” He rests his hand on Clay's shoulder making him look up. “You can’t write them back, they can’t know where we are or what we are doing.”

Clay lays down his pencil and stares at his letter.

“How will they know I’m alive?”

Deer Bestie,

I’m only writing to you because it feels right, Oath came on, remember that song? The one we would sing to each other every time it came on. It was the stupidest song but it always reminds me of middle school when we sang it in front of the school at the talent show. Stupid but worth it.

I’m still not over how you just got up and left after everything happened. It was two weeks after the worst week of my life and you just left. Gone.

You didn’t even have the thought in your head to tell me when you first signed up! You waited until the week before you left to tell me because you knew I would try to convince you not to go. You fucking idiot! I don’t think I will ever forgive you for this.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t miss you. I miss you so much.

Logan and Finn are amazing and doing all they can to make sure I’m okay. I love them, but it isn’t the same. They don’t know me as well as you and I just miss my brother.

No one has heard from you and I swear if you end up being dead I will never forgive you. I will be so fucking pissed I will meet you in hell and beat you up.

Come home Clay, please come back safe.

Love,

Leo

P.S.

You're a dickhead.

Pushing the doors open with vigor Clay and Leo strutted into their bar like they owned the place. Seeing new faces around the bullpen, Leo and him shared a knowing look and hopped the fence as a man with glasses got thrown from the bull again. Clay helped him up as Leo went over to the control board where a strikingly handsome man stood next to him. All broad shoulders and deep-toned skin. But Clay had a girlfriend so he didn’t look as long as he wished he could. Instead cracking jokes with this character in front of him.

He looked around at all the new faces, they all were attractive well-built men, he guessed professional athletes but all the logos he saw on shirts and hats. His eyes landed on two men who seemed very very close, passing a cheap cig back and forth while talking to Jimmy, the auctioneer that worked for Clay's dad. When he locked eyes with the shorter man with green eyes he knew right away.

Leo was going home with them.

Leo whistled at him as the other man walked off and Leo hopped on the machine. Saying goodbye to James, at least he thinks that's the name he told him, and walking over to the control board with Leo’s settings. He pressed the start key as the crowd sang with the song that was playing.

He cheered Leo on as he was thrashed around, catching the two guys who he spotted earlier just drinking Leo in. Lucky. It wasn’t that Clay didn’t like his girlfriend, it was just, she didn’t satisfy him in the ways he wanted. It was always about her so clay would have mediocre sex, sometimes good depending on how mad she was at him.

He had told her that he likes to be… more submissive in bed. She would make fun of him for this and while Clay enjoys being degraded he doesn’t enjoy it when it's because she thinks of him as less than a man. It really bothers him but she doesn’t care.

Later that night Boot Scootin Boogie comes on and Leo drags him to the dance floor after they had a few drinks, dancing in time with everyone else. Leo turns to him and sing with the song

“I want a shot of that redhead yonder lookin at me.” He winks at said redhead and notices the look he gets from both men. Clay smiles and laughs, shoving Leo playfully to get back in line. They dance until the song ends and wander back over to their drinks and sit as the next song starts up.

A couple songs later and Leo is waving goodbye as the two drag him out of the bar by his belt loop., Clay lifts his drink as a salute to him and drinks it in one go. He stands up and stretches, now that Leo is gone he should probably go or else Ashley will find out and give him hell for it.

“Hey yeehaw, come here!” Clay looks around and then points at himself in a questioning way when he sees who was yelling. James. Nodding James beckons him over and pats the seat between him and the man from earlier . “Your friend just stole two of our teammates!”

“From the looks of it, it seems your teammates stole my buddy.” He smiles when a man with practically white hair and a thick accent hands him a beer. “But they did seem his type.”

“Yeah, those two have been in love for years but won’t admit it. It gets really tense sometimes in the locker room.”

“What do y’all play?”

“Hockey” The man Clayton was purposefully avoiding looking at says. He takes a drink instead of answering him.

“Y’all enjoying the music? Doesn’t seem like something y’all would normally listen too.” He smiles when he gets clapped on the back by a laughing James.

“If you have better suggestions for country music we would love to hear them. Maybe we will start playing it in the locker room.” The man smiles at him and Clay feels his face heat up as he imagines being under him. The alcohol is really starting to hit.

“I- Yeah, I can give you some.” He can’t tear his eyes away from the man. He gives them loads of songs to listen to and some even come on in the bar. He sees James making a playlist and makes fun of him for it. Clay doesn’t really listen to playlists, seems boring to always know what songs are coming next.

His phone goes off with a text alert, he reads it and his face falls a little. He stands up and salutes the guys as he says goodbye and walks out the bar in a hurry. Outside waiting for him is his pickup, with Ashley in the driver's seat. He gets in and gives her a kiss on the cheek.

They drive in silence back to his house.