#and having characters be called shit like duck and mama is like yeah. yeah. that's it.
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yardsards · 1 year ago
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small thing i love about taz amnesty: the way so many characters just have random unexplained nicknames. it's just such an authentic part of small town/appalachian culture that makes the world feel more real + serves as a reminder that like yeah the guys making this are FROM here, they genuinely know what it's like
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ducknewtonscoolhat · 1 year ago
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On this day I present
Every single time Duck Newton is horrible at lying !
Episode 7
Duck: Yeah, it’s a nickname. Listen, y’all got a van handy, why don’t you hop in and get on trucking. Don’t forget to— don’t worry ‘bout your clothes. We’ll drive them up seperate.
Swimmer: Why can’t we take our clothes?
Duck: [freezing up] You need to— you need— uh. Here, I’ll get them. Y’all start loading in the van and I’ll bring your clothes out to ya’s. Just another one of the many services we offer from the Forestry Service.
Episode 10
Pigeon: Well, I know how to do it, I just wanna know why.
Duck: Perfect. Perfect. Why? It's for firefighter training? Yeah, it's for firefighter training. It's been a little while since I last told someone that, so I had some time to forget it. But it's for firefighting training, cuz we can't get enough water pressure to fight the fires, forest fires.
Pigeon: Out in Monongahela?
Duck: Yeeeeeeep.
Pigeon: Duck, that's on the opposite side of town. I can find other places that I can get you some more water pressure instead of pumping it out of the water park almost a mile away.
Duck: Yeah, but the water park is definitely gonna be closed. If you can tell me somewhere where you can guarantee that they're not gonna need that amount of water that's using that amount, I'd love to hear about it. Cus, off the top of my head, I can't improvise anything.
Pigeon: There's a reservoir right next to Monongahela.
Duck: The reservoir is a source of water but it's not gonna give other— fuck, listen Pigeon, here's the thing. I... love... to… practice fishing. But... the running water... frightens me, it's called hydrophobia. And I would love to practice my cast in a real water environment where I can get in a large body where I can guarantee that running water won't be a factor. And I would just love to practice my cast in a guaranteed still body. But here's the other thing, sometimes if you do it in a lake, that's what you're thinking, a fish will bite it and normally that's ideal, but I'm just trying to practice casting. It's like, when you don't want to catch, that's when they're biting, y’know what I mean? So I need a still body of water that I can guarantee won't move to practice my fishing casting.
Episode 13
Duck: I should’ve put some time into it, honestly, but I uh… I was real busy with family over the holidays, so I didn’t make much—
Mama: You literally just said you didn’t have any family in town over the holidays.
Duck: God dammit. Dammit!
Mama: I mean, it’s fine if you couldn’t dig anything up, but you don’t gotta lie to old Mama, you know?
Duck: Dammit! Dammit, Duck!
Mama: You don’t have to beat yourself up about it, Duck, I mean po—
Duck: Fuck!
Episode 14
EMT: Do you know what happened to him?
Duck: Oh boy…um…do you want the truth or a more convincing lie? Um, nah so, okay, right… so the Pizza Hut sign started to fall, ‘cause of the weather, and he ran up there on… a fire escape… and tried to push it? …With a bat? Damn it. Nah, he just pushed it, and it fell, but then he fell ‘cause he got shocked. I bet… mmm…I didn’t see. I was in-Ah, shit! Alright, hey fol-hey guys, rewind. I-hey guys, rewind a second. Ah fuck! I was inside, I didn’t see. Anything! I don’t know… this man. I do know this man. His name-Fuck!  Alright, I Ned, hi, here's-hmmm. Alright, so this man’s name is Ned, and he’s a friend of mine, and I don’t know what the hell happened to him, but you know this guy. He’s always getting into something. I don’t know, I was in the building, I almost got killed by a Pizza Hut sign. I might be in shock!
Episode 18
Duck: Honestly… uh if I gotta tell you the truth, Juno, I’m— I was trying to get into character. I’ve been—
Juno: You’re going undercover with these teens?
Duck: —I’m going undercover. I got a undercover teenage identity. It’s— it’s Frick Richums and when I assume the identity of Frick Richums, I’m trying to get undercover, with the Hornets [hisses] so I can find their illegal grow thing. [grunts]
Juno: You are a truly miserable liar, Duck Newton.
Duck: Goddamnit! I put on such a good— damnit!
Juno: Hey, when you’re finished with the… with those, those nails. Would you mind taking them back to the station? I need to sort of keep going around the perimeter see if I can find something to, you know, maybe help with your investigation to take down those— those drug kingpins, the Hornets.
Duck: Yeah, Juno, about that. I— I was kidding about that, of course. I was just having some fun. But I did… I did hear some of them talking on...... Facebook about you and how they were gonna target you. Like they need to get you out of the way. And it kinda freaked me out a little bit. Can you think of any reason anybody would wanna get you… outta the way? Or— or be targeting you? Like… for this?
Episode 21
(Deputy Dewey is asking for alibis)
Duck: Me— Me— Me too.
Deputy Dewey: You too what? You were
Duck: Yup.
Deputy Dewey: Alright…
Duck: Me too. I was— Yup, I— Yup, me too, for both. Yup, me too. Mmm…
Aubrey: Duck, are you okay? You look like you need to use the bathroom.
Duck: Nope. Yeah, I do. Yup. Uh, Burritos, alright… Bye.
Episode 22 Featuring Ned and Aubrey also being bad at lying
Morgue Technician: Can I help y'all with something?
Duck: Well, we would like to see the bodies of--
Aubrey: My brother!
Duck: My dad.
Ned: My son.
Duck: His brother. Her-- His-- His son, her brother, my dad.
Aubrey: Not related. There's two of 'em.
Ned: But you have to figure out which two.
Duck: We need to see a body for a dare. I'm sorry about all the lies from before but we need to see a body for a dare.
Aubrey: I was dared to look at the body of my brother.
Ned: And my son.
Aubrey: I was dared to look at the body of his son. Who is also my brother. Because he is my father.
Episode 32
Duck: Um… yup. It‘s… Harpo. Uh, all… [imitating crackling noise] Y‘all hearing this? [imitating crackling] The… radio break up. Radio break up. Mrrr.
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jjmaybanksbaby · 4 years ago
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Where It Leads (Rafe Cameron)
Summer IV
Part 07: Crashing Down
series masterlist | previous part
summary: A jarring family emergency forces you to consider the future of your relationship with Rafe Cameron.
a/n: I'm a little bit emotional about this series ending because I've had so much fun writing it! Enjoy the last part and, as always, please come share your reactions with me in my inbox. Okay, that's all from me!
word count: 2.1k words
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Rafe Cameron knew how to text. He was somehow witty, charming, and hilarious all in less characters than a single tweet. Texting with most boys was like talking to a brick wall: single-syllable answers, unironic uses of punctuation, asking “What are you wearing?” before even listening to how your day went. Though, to be fair, Rafe had asked that same question a few times, which always earned him a sarcastic answer in return. Well, except for that one time.
You’d been forced to spill the beans about your dreamy summer romance to Alice and Kensie after one of Rafe’s funnier texts almost made you pee yourself laughing at the lunch table.
“Oh, so he’s a stud muffin,” Alice announced, peering over Kenzie’s shoulder at the photo on your phone.
“Please god don’t call anyone a stud muffin ever again Al,” Kenzie replied.
“What? The 80s are like making a comeback.”
“Yeah, not that,” you countered and Alice huffed.
“He’s totally hot though,” Kenzie said, handing the phone back to you. “And I kinda hate you for not telling us about him.”
You looked down at the picture. Rafe was kissing your check while you grinned up at the camera, the golden hour lighting made the whole thing look rather enchanting. It was your favorite picture of you and him.
“Oh shit,” Kenzie said causing you to look up from the phone. “You’re like in love in love with him.”
“What? No,” you protested. Yes, your brain corrected.
Kenzie glanced over at Alice for backup.
“Besides, I wasn’t hiding him. I just didn’t know if there was anything there to...tell,” you finished.
“I wish I had a handsome summer fling with spectacular cheekbones,” Alice sighed.
“Don’t let your boyfriend hear you saying that.” Kenzie chucked a fry off her tray at Alice who dodged it expertly.
“Oh, please. Matty knows I would dump his ass for someone who looks like a young Chuck Bass any day of the week. Gimme your phone. I wanna see the photos again y/n.”
“I seriously don’t know how you and Matthew have been together for two years,” Kenzie replied.
“Are you kidding? They’re practically made for each other,” you added.
“The phone, please,” Alice interjected. “I wanna thirst over your mans while my boyfriend is sucking up to his English teacher so she doesn’t fail him. Of course, I told him he needed to actually read Wuthering Heights and not just sparknotes it. But did he listen? No. I picked a real winner y’all,” she finished, taking the phone from your outstretched hands. “You sure Rafe doesn’t have any brothers? Not even like a half-step brother?”
So yeah, going great. Against the odds of three thousand miles, the whole thing was somehow working. Long-distance friends with benefits? Check. Well, except for those moments when that nagging feeling in your stomach came back and you’d start overthinking everything. His texts would sit, unread in your phone for days or even a whole week, slowly sinking to the bottom of your messages.
Then came the call from the Kildare Country Hospital in the early hours of a foggy April morning. You should have gone to sleep hours ago but were still up, desperately trying to cram Maria’s lines into your brain while also texting Rafe. The Sound of Music opened in three weeks and your director had already chewed you out twice for not being off-book, something about being an upperclassman and the lead, and what kind of an example were you setting for the rest of the program. Big speeches were kind of your director's thing, you learned to just ride them out.
Around 1 a.m. your phone ran with an incoming FaceTime call from Rafe. You pressed the green acccept button, a smile spread across your face as Rafe’s own filled the screen.
“Hey Broadway Star.”
“Hi Rafe.” The dim lighting of his bedroom made his feature especially striking. “What are you still doing up?”
“Can’t sleep. Plus you’re up too so. How’s the memorizing going?”
“Shitty,” you replied, closing your binder with a sigh. “I’m too tired to do anymore of it tonight anyway.”
“You know, I was thinking I could come to Oregon for your opening night?”
“Really?” The possibility of Rafe sitting in the audience made your heart race.
“Yeah, why not? I’ll ask Ward if I can borrow the plane that weekend and I bet Sarah’ll want to come too. I wanna see my girl kill it. I miss you.”
“I miss you too, Rafe. You know my friends think you’re hot.”
“Oh, do they?” Rafe replied, rolling over onto his back in his bed.
“Don’t let it get to your head, Cameron.”
The home phone ran but you ignored it, much more invested in your conversation with Rafe. The second time the hospital left a message. Your Nonna’s heart had given out. The prognosis wasn’t good. She had barely any time left.
Your heart dropped as the words echoed over the speaker of the answering machine.
“Rafe,” you said, cutting him off momentarily. “I gotta go. I’ll call you back later. I gotta-” you ended the call before Rafe even had the chance to respond. You dropped your phone on the kitchen table, dashing up the stairs to your parents’ bedroom. Your father was booking a flight for your mother back to the Outer Banks minutes later.
The end had come so quickly, so unexpectedly. It was almost like that made it harder. There'd been just enough time for your mom and uncle to get to the Outer Banks, sitting on each side of your Nonna as her final breaths passed through her lungs. Now, everyone was there to say goodbye one last time. Uncle Austin and his fiancé. Your mom and dad. Both your siblings. The entire population of Figure Eight.
☼☼☼
Rain drizzled down from the dark, gray clouds looming overhead. It was as if Mother Nature was mourning your Nonna too, hiding the sunshine away.
Three baby ducks followed their mama into the man-made pond at the edge of the cemetery. You watched their tiny feet kick up small waves disturbing the peaceful water and the tears silently slipped down your face.
The cars were waiting to take you back to your Nonna's house for the wake. The same house with the for-sale sign now stuck in the front yard. The for-sale sign with Rose's patronizing grin that you were starting to really hate. Your dad had handled that. Listing the house. He'd handled most of the funeral arrangement's actually because your mother had been too sunken into her grief to make any decision. Sending out the invitations, picking out your Nonna's casket, choosing the flowers. Your mother clung to him during the entire funeral, weeping into his shoulder.
“Y/n?” Rafe's voice called out from behind you and you turned to see him walked toward you. He’d stood at the back of the church with his family during the funeral. You had longed for him to be sitting in the first pew next to you, to have had his hand to hold onto to ground you, but it hardly would have been appropriate. Your Nonna would have sooner risen from the dead than have had a Cameron front row at her funeral.
As soon as he was close enough, Rafe reached for you, pulling your body tight into him. Your head landed on his chest and the sobs came moments later. God, he always smelled the same. He just let you cry, holding you close, smoothing his hand over your hair.
“I know you’re selling your grandma’s house but I was thinking you could stay with me for the summer," he said as your tears began to slow. It was hard to imagine that you wouldn't return to the Outer Banks once school let out. It was the first week of May already and you could feel the tourist-attracting town waking up. But selling the house just made more sense. Your older sister was already living her life in New York, a real adult life. Next summer, you'd be moving out too, headed to college. The house would sit empty for eight months out of the year, your family couldn't keep it and your uncle certainly didn’t want it. Selling it just had to happen.
You stepped back, slipping out of his embrace. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Rafe.”
“Why not?”
“Cause we’re like Romeo and Juliet.”
“I copied Cleo’s notes for that unit," he joked, trying to lighten to damp mood. “Plus I was never a fan of Leo DiCaprio so I didn’t finish the movie either.”
“It means we’re not supposed to be together, you and me. And whenever we try, the universe rips us apart. We hurt each other.”
Rafe shifted awkwardly on his feet, clearly wanting to reach for you again but stopping himself from doing it. “But I can't lose you.”
You reached your hand out, brushing away a strand of hair that had fallen in front of his eyes. “Oh Rafe, don’t you get it? You never really had me.” You stood up onto your tiptoes to kiss him just like you had the first time three years ago. Rafe barely parted his lips, kissing you back gently. Your hand cupped his face, your thump stroking over his cheek. It was a goodbye. Both of you knew it. It was an ending and this was your closure. You pulled away, your hand falling away from his face.
You couldn’t bring yourself to say the actual words. Your eyes fell to the ground. You needed to walk away now. You side-stepped Rafe but he grabbed your waist, turning you back around to face him.
“So that’s it? You’re not even gonna try to fight for us?”
“What even is there to fight for, Rafe? I’ve been fighting for us for the past four years. If we were supposed to be together that car wouldn’t have crashed into ours, I wouldn’t have fallen for Evan when I did, we wouldn’t be having this conversation at my Nonna’s funeral. What? Are we supposed to do long distance for all of college? I hardly know who I am right now. I have no idea who I’ll be in the next four years. Our future selves might not even like each other. I’m not gonna wait around for you Rafe and I would never ask you to do that for me.” You twirled the small, star charm between your fingers, a nervous habit you'd developed over the past year. His eyes dropped down to your neck momentarily and his adam's apple visibly bobbing as he swallowed his next weeks.
“You were it for me, you know. I tried to give a fuck about anyone else but I couldn’t get your gorgeous, stupid face out of my mind. I only wanted you.” Rafe paused gauging your reaction “I was falling in love with you.”
Your eyes wandered over his stoic expression. “The feeling was mutual, Rafe Cameron.”
He dropped your wrist but you both stood, not moving or saying anything. “Do you wanna walk me back to the car?”
“Yeah.” He reached for your hand, interlocking your fingers. Your other hand held onto his bicep so you walked together through the graveyard back to the parking lot.
The moment felt precious and delicate, like the fragile china your Nonna used to collect. You wondered what would happen to all that china.
Rafe placed a chaste kiss on your lips before opening the door of the car.
“I’ll miss you,” you said, the words hanging in the air meaning so much.
“Me too,” Rafe agreed.
You wanted one more kiss, one more passionate declaration of how much this all had meant but that would make leaving Rafe so much more impossible.
You climbed into the car, dropping Rafe’s hand in the process.
“See you around Cameron.” You knew it wouldn’t happen but it felt better than a goodbye.
He smiled back. “Maybe so.”
Perhaps Rafe was right and you’d both end up at a small liberal arts college in California taking the same second-year Econ class with a professor who always smelled like weed. Perhaps the stars would align and two of you would realize the universe wasn’t trying to keep you apart. It was just waiting for the right moment to show you that the love you had for each other was the soulmates, forever and ever kind of love. Perhaps you would get married and Sarah would be your maid of honor, of course. You’d buy back your Nonna’s house to raise your troubling-making kids in. Perhaps, you would find your way back and wake up each day and choose each other again and again.
Or perhaps, he'd always be your right-person-wrong-time. And, in the end, the passing days will steal away your memories of the blue-eyed boy from the Outer Banks.
taglist! @oreoenthusiast13
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searchingwardrobes · 4 years ago
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It’s Been . . . a DAY 1/3
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Yeah, I've got WIPs, but yeah, this came to me. My oldest, years ago, had to pee really bad and NO ONE would let me use their bathroom. An insurance office, of all places, took pity on me, and my kid proceeded to pee on their bathroom floor. I burst into tears, and the woman there hugged me and told me how her kids peed in all kinds of places when they were potty training. The people were so nice, they refused to let me clean it up. I've never forgotten that act of kindness, and I likely never will. So that's the inspiration for this story which will have three parts.
Summary: Emma Swan bursts into Killian's life in spectacular fashion - when her three year old pees on his office floor. Nevertheless, Killian is mesmerized by this tenacious woman. Perhaps fate will let them cross paths again . . .
Rated: G
Words: Just shy of 2k
Also on Ao3
Tagging the usuals: @kmomof4  @snowbellewells @whimsicallyenchantedrose @xhookswenchx @teamhook @let-it-raines @winterbythesea @spartanguard @shireness-says @superchocovian @thesschesthair @resident-of-storybrooke @vvbooklady1256 @hookedonapirate @ultraluckycatnd @hollyethecurious @welllpthisishappening @wellhellotragic @bethacaciakay @optomisticgirl @lfh1226-linda @ilovemesomekillianjones @ekr032-blog-blog @itsfabianadocarmo @profdanglaisstuff @thisonesatellite​ (sorry if I forgot anyone - I am really tired right now!)
Chapter One: 
“Can we use your bathroom, please?”
Jones & Jones Accounting Firm isn’t your stereotypical lifeless, silent establishment, just as the Jones brothers don’t look like your stereotypical accountants. Nevertheless, the frazzled blonde bursts in upon a moment of intense concentration. It’s tax season, after all. Killian takes in said blonde, her hair a wild disarray and tension in her shoulders. She’s clearly not having the best day. A squirming three year old grips her hand, doing what Liam and Elsa always call “the potty dance.”
All four employees of Jones & Jones (it technically should be Jones, Jones, & Jones, but Elsa said that was far too pretentious) hurriedly assure the woman, “yes, yes, of course,” leaping to their feet, hovering, oozing politeness, and pointing to the end of the hall to the facilities. The woman practically weeps in relief.
“Pee pee now, Mama!” the child cries, and his mother scoops him up, holding him out in front of her as she races for the toilet. It’s another maneuver Killian is familiar with thanks to Liam and Elsa - or his nephew, to be more specific.
The blonde - he really wants to know her name - sets the boy down in front of the toilet. In her haste she doesn’t even bother to shut the door.
It’s too late.
Before she can even get the child’s pants down, a yellow puddle is spreading at his feet.
“I’m so sorry,” she gasps to the adults still unhelpfully hovering.
Then she starts ugly crying. Somehow, Killian knows this is out of character for her.
The boy begins to cry in earnest too. Liam and Elsa race off, most likely to take care of this, as the only two adults at Jones & Jones with kids. Ariel, who knows nothing about personal space and has never met a stranger, puts a comforting arm around the blonde.
“It’s okay, lass,” Killian assures, “really.”
“How can it be okay? We burst in here and peed on your floor!”
Killian bites the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling or pointing out that only the lad did the actual peeing.
Liam appears with a roll of paper towels and a mop. “Accidents happen,” he tells the young mother cheerfully. “Potty training?”
“Yes!” the woman practically wails. “He’s three, so I know we should be done -“
“Ours is three too,” Elsa interrupts as she pushes a stack of clothes into her arms, “and he still has accidents. Which is why I have a spare set of clothes in my desk drawer.”
“Oh, spare clothes,” the woman mutters, shuffling through the massive bag slung over one shoulder. “Shit, he peed on those yesterday.”
He continues to sob as Liam lifts him out of his yellow puddle.
“So take these,” Elsa insists once again. “My name is Elsa, by the way.”
“Emma,” the blonde answers with a trembling chin as she takes the clothes, “and I never fall apart like this with strangers.” She chuckles sardonically. “Hell, I don’t do it with people I do know, but we’ve just had the worst time. Henry said he had to go, but every shop on this street said no when I begged for a bathroom. I was trying to buy him a pair of shoes. I mean, who the hell opens a kids’ thrift store and doesn’t put in a public bathroom?”
Killian once again bites his lip at the heat in her voice. He believes her when she insists that she rarely falls apart. She’s feisty and tough as nails - no question.
“Well,” Liam says, stuffing the wastebasket with sodden paper towels, “I’ve gotten most of it so you can change your lad out of his wet things. I’ll mop up when you’re done.”
Emma looks at each of them in turn, her eyes wide and glistening with unshed tears. “Why are you all being so nice?”
It’s clear from the way she says it that kindness has been rare in her life. It makes Killian wonder about the boy’s father. She isn’t wearing a ring, but that doesn’t mean the man isn’t around. Whoever he is, he’s done nothing to ease that look of mistrust in her eyes.
“Because it’s clear you’re having a rough day,” Killian tells her gently, “and we’ve all been there.”
“Some of us literally,” quips Liam, and Elsa laughs.
“Your office was the sixth place I tried,” Emma whispers. “I never would have asked to use a bathroom in a business office if I wasn’t desperate.”
The boy - Henry - is still sniffling. “Was I a bad boy, Mama?”
“Oh baby, no,” Emma croons, falling to her knees before her son. “Even a big person might have had an accident holding it as long as you had to.”
Her soft voice melts the little boy, and he collapses wearily into his mother’s arms for comfort. Emma obliges, heedless of the child’s smelly dampness. She’s a good mother, that’s clear. The businesses on this street however? Killian clenches his jaw as he mentally ticks them off: the thrift store Emma had mentioned, a sporting goods store, a ladies boutique, a children’s book store, a jewelry store, and then Jones & Jones. Every single one had no reason to deny the desperate mother and child an exception to their “employees only” restrooms.
“Next time, love,” Killian says to the resilient mother before him, “you just stride right back to the bathroom no matter what they say.”
“Yeah,” Ariel agrees, anger flashing in her eyes, “I understand why they might not want a public bathroom, but surely they could see it was an emergency.”
“You just tell them it’s either let you use their bathroom or your kid’s gonna pee right on their floor,” Elsa grumbles. She’s clearly pissed - pun completely intended - or she wouldn’t have spoken with such poor diction.
Emma laughs, her face more at ease than it has been since she arrived. “I’ll remember that next time. Desperate times call for desperate measures.”
“And potty training is definitely a desperate time,” Liam commiserates.
They leave Emma and Henry alone then so she can change his clothes. When mother and son exit the bathroom, they both look much calmer.
“I can’t say thank you enough,” Emma tells them. “I’ll come back by tomorrow to return the clothes.”
Elsa waves away her offer. “No worries. Those are pretty worse for wear. Ian won’t miss them, I promise.”
“Ian Jones, I’m guessing?” Emma asks. “That’s a nice name.”
“It’s a nickname, actually,” Liam tells her from where he’s mopping the bathroom. “He’s named after this git of a brother, over here.”
“Oi, but you did name him after me, didn’t you?” Killian shoots back.
“Nickname, huh?” Emma asks with a tilt of her head and a teasing smile. “Short for . . . ?”
“Killian.” Is it just his imagination, or is she flirting with him? “Killian Jones.”
He extends his hand, and she takes it.
“Emma Swan.”
A last name! His heart soars. “It suits you.”
Emma’s smile brightens even as she rolls her eyes. No, it isn’t his imagination - she is flirting. “I bet you say that to all the girls.”
“Only the ones with kids who pee in my office.”
She tilts her head back and lets out a full-throated laugh. It does something to his heart - makes it expand or something equally cheesy. Her cheeks are pink as she looks at him while tugging at the ends of her hair.
“So . . . um, I still feel kind of bad about that.” Her nose wrinkles, and he notices the light dusting of freckles there.
“Well, you could make it up to us by staying and having dinner. It will be here any minute: sub sandwiches and practically a whole salad bar. Ariel always orders way too much.”
“It’s better than running low!” the redhead snaps indignantly.
His smile wavers as he watches a shadow pass over Emma’s face, dimming her eyes. It’s as if he’s watched a wall fall back into place. She shuffles her feet, and ducks her head. Henry meets her gaze, popping a thumb into his mouth.
“I . . . um, think this is a Happy Meal kinda night - right kid?”
“Yay!” Henry cheers, bounding up and down in that jerky way toddlers always have. “Ticken nuggets!”
“Chicken nuggets,” Emma corrects.
“Dat’s what I say,” Henry retorts with a frown.
Killian catches the boys gaze and winks at him. The boy giggles before popping his thumb back in his mouth. Then Killian regards Emma again, weighing the risk of his next question, but he has to know.
“His father is expecting dinner too, perhaps?”
Emma’s eyes narrow, and it’s clear he’s made a serious tactical error. “He certainly isn’t expecting it from me, wherever the hell he is.”
Killian ducks his head. “Apologies, lass.”
Emma sucks in a breath, then lets it out slowly. When she speaks again, it’s with measured calm.
“I thank all of you again, but we really need to go.”
They all talk over one another assuring Emma that it was no trouble at all, but she practically dashes out the door. When it closes, sadness sweeps over Killian at the thought that he’ll probably never see her again.
“Well, you sure mucked that up, little brother.”
Killian glowers at Liam. “Shut it.”
“Leave him alone, babe,” Elsa admonishes gently. “He had to find some way to make sure he wasn’t flirting with a woman who was already taken.”
“You think she was flirting?” Killian asks.
Ariel snorts. “Please. For a minute there, she was practically melting at your feet.”
Killian groans as he runs a hand over his face. “You’re right Liam. I mucked it up.”
“I don’t think so,” Elsa muses, her gaze drifting to the door Emma Swan had just exited. “I think her walls flew back up before you probed about Henry’s dad.”
Killian sinks dejectedly into his desk chair. “And now I’ll probably never see her again.”
“So what?” Liam shoves the mop back into the broom closet before heading back to his own desk. “You only talked to her for like ten minutes.”
“There was an instant connection, though.” Ariel clasps her hands together and practically swoons.
“And you never know,” adds Elsa, “the two of you may cross paths again.”
Killian frowns as he stares at the spreadsheets on his computer screen. He hasn’t been immediately affected by a woman in this manner since Milah. Liam’s right - it’s foolish to read much into their brief meeting.
Yet he can’t help hoping that he’ll see Emma Swan again.
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blue-angel-wings · 4 years ago
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Halloween with Angel.
Word count: 1,468
Characters: Angel Reyes x reader (Y/N), Gilly Lopez, Coco Cruz, Leticia Cruz.
Warnings: Cursing, Halloween (? Idk some people don’t like it 🤷‍♀️)
It was nearing Halloween, and whilst all your neighbours had started to decorate their homes and front lawns, yours was bare and depressing, due to no fault of your own. Your boyfriend Angel had made it clear that the decorations in the house you to shared were perfectly fine and served their purpose but Christ they were depressing.
The decorations were disgusting collecting dust and growing mould from being thrown randomly in the attic and you were struggling to tell the difference between the real and fake spiders. But Angel had yet to grant you the permission to buy new decorations. Not that you need explicit permission but you viewed you and Angel as a team so you made decisions like these together. Sadly.
You and Angel had lived together for years at this point so you got used to each other’s ways and quirks, so really Angel should’ve been prepared for your enthusiasm for the holiday.
“Knock, knock and I’m already in.” Said your brother whilst you were sat a the table eating breakfast. Angel had gone for shower a few minutes ago so the house was quiet apart from the quiet sound of the water running.
“Hey Y/B/N, you okay?” You rounded the corner of the island to see your brother with your niece wearing a cute little pumpkin onesie.
“And hello to you too precious girl!” You cooed to the young baby currently yanking on your hoop earrings. You tickled her tummy just to hear her giggles whilst your brother babbled on about work. Obviously hearing the adorable shriek of laughter from your niece, Angel entered the kitchen and snatched her from your arms to have his fill of the baby cuteness. Begrudgingly you turn to brother to now pay attention to his words.
“So I was wondering if you remember where it is that Mama always took us for Halloween so we could go to the ‘kid friendly’ haunted house.” He said making air quotations when saying kid friendly. He stole a piece of bacon whilst you took your mind back to time when you were younger.
“Yeah she just took us to the garden centre, god knows if they still do it, people always complained it was a bit scary.” you reminded him, whilst continuing your breakfast.
“So you wanna go, think it would be a bit of fun, take us back to our childhood and pass on the tradition to Mia.” Your bother spoke whilst removing Mia from Angel’s arms, she fussed a little but settled quickly.
“Yes! I can get new decorations for the house, they have the best decorations!” You bolted out of the chair heading to door before Angel spoke up. “ No! We don’t need decorations we have them here.”
“But Angel-“
“No babe I’m putting my foot down, please it’s a waste of money, just don’t. You’ll spend more time putting them up and taking them back down than them actually be img on display!”
“Ooh he’s putting his foot down.” Your brother mocked, provoking Angel to throw the tea towel at him.
“Fine I won’t bring home any new decorations.”
“Thank you, I love you baby.” Angel spoke kissing your forehead and leaving to speak with the guys about an incoming run.
You stuck to your word, and didn’t return with any decorations, that’s because you ordered them to arrive to your home a few days later. This was for multiple reasons, 1) you couldn’t fit them all in your car and Angel would flip his shit if he saw you carry what is seemingly the whole store and 2) You knew Angel was going on a run so you order it to come whilst he was out. It was perfect because by the time it all up and looking pretty it would be too late. What can you say, you always get your way.
The day arrived and you were buzzing, it was time to get your spooky season started. You woke up alone in bed which wasn’t strange, as Angel was due to be on a run. It wasn’t until you heard yelling and swearing in the living room did you discover that was not the case. Walking out you were greeted with site of your boyfriend and his 2 extra shadows Gilly, sat at the table eating your food, and Coco sat next to Angel playing PlayStation.
“What are you doing here?” You exclaimed from shock.
“Uhh I live here-“
“I’ve been paying the bills with you for the past 2 years.”
When you don’t respond to the comment and continue to stare at him confused.
He points to his chest stating, “I am Angel” condescendingly thinking it’s funny.
“You’re supposed to be on a run.”
“It was only a small run,we weren’t needed.” He said shrugging like it was nothing when I’m reality it was huge.
“Damn Y/N you ain’t happy to see us?” Coco asks standing to hug you, you accept the embrace with a smile but on the inside you are screaming, why did he have to be here when you don’t need him to be but gone when you did need him?
A few hours into the day and they were still here and your delivery when due to arrive imminently.
“Don’t you want to go to the clubhouse I mean it’s more fun there, I mean you spend every waking second of your days there anyway why not go there now.” You exclaimed getting antsy.
“Nah we’re good.” Coco replied, you roll your eyes and spin on your heel to go to the kitchen and watch for your delivery of doom to pull up. “Why you trynna to get rid of us sweetheart?” Gilly asked jokingly, startling you in the process. “The other day I went to the store with my brother and bought way to many Halloween decorations when he specifically told me to not to and I thought by having them delivered whilst he was on his run, it’d be too late for him to do anything about it but now I know he isn’t on a run that planned it fucked.” You confessed. “Well damn baby you in shit now.” “Gilly” you whined palming his chest softly.
“Okay stop I’ll get him out and tell Coco to call Leti to come and help you put them up. Don’t stressed your pretty head!” He said tapping your temple.
“Thank you Gilly you are a lifesaver!”
“I know baby, it’s a gift.” He joked shrugging his shoulders like it was nothing.
Gilly stuck to his word and got them out the house, just before the delivery turned up. Coco had indeed called Leti to help you but you guys spent more time gossiping than actually hanging anything.
“ I think you may have gone a little too far with this.” She said holding a 7ft robotic witch on your porch swing as you cable tied it’s ankles to the structure of your porch, so the kids didn’t steal it.
“Oh shush you’re as bad as Angel, it looks great so don’t complain, it was worth all the time it spent to put it up and the ...$300 it actually cost.” You muttered the last bit hoping she didn’t pick it up.
“ Y/N, holy sh-“ she was cut off by the roar of bikes coming down the street, announcing the arrival of your man and his brothers.
You braced yourself for the backlash but when you turned around to man your man he had nothing but a smile on his face, Coco and Gilly hung back on the bikes whilst Angel took in the scene.
“Baby-“ you started.
“I like it.”
“What?”
“I knew you couldn’t resist the decorations at the store and when you came back home empty handed I was shocked, then earlier when you wanted us out I knew you had this arriving.” He exclaimed gesturing the house covered in fake cobwebs and pumpkins, and obviously the freaky witch on the porch. You breathed a sigh of relief and looked up at him with total adoration.
“ I love you Angel, thank you for understanding but your lazy ass coulda helped if you knew.” You complained cuddling into his side. He chuckled lowly. The moment was ruined by a scream and then followed by a gunshot. You ducked into Angel from the fear.
“You scary motherfucker, jump at me and imma shoot yo’ ass! Do it again hoe and see what happens.” Coco shouted with gun pointed at the witch.
“What the fuck Coco it’s not real.” You pointed to the now ruined witch.
Coco stepped forward gingerly, gun still cocked, inspecting the witch, confirming with a slight nod of the head that it was in fact a robot.
“My bad” He shrugged.
Taglist: @mayans-sauce.
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sassyduckqueen · 4 years ago
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Miraculous: Rise of Anatis 44
Another terrible episode down. I hate this one as well. It's just as cringy as Puppeteer 2 but I couldn't resist a chance to have Luka help out Marinette. I'm a sucker for cute Lukanette moments. Anyway, try to enjoy this as best as you can. This is the best I could do but I still dislike it. Also Sasha Mallard is my cameo appearance. Sasha can be shortened to Sassy and Mallard is type of duck. Sasha Mallard = Sassy Duck. I figured since Thomas Astruc can put himself into the episode so can I haha. Though Sasha isn't my real name but it does contain my name :)
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Chapter Forty-Four: Animaestro
"Oh, I can totally get you an interview with the director of the Anatis and Lady Noir film," Lila gasped as she walked into the canteen with Alya, causing Marinette to roll her eyes. There is no way she knew the director and Marinette wanted to shout out and call her out on it but she knew Lila would just turn it around on her. She took a deep breathe and focused on her happy place, feeling her mind relax and calm down. Lila might be a liar and Marinette wanted nothing more then to call her out but that would ruin the plan and that in the long run would bring her way more satisfaction this way. Anatis intended to bring her down once and for all. He saw as the threat she really was and he was more then happy to take out but he wanted to make sure she could not lie her way out of it. It made Marinette feel relief as she had someone else on her side other then Luka. Not that she didn't want Luka on her side. It was just nice to have someone else as well. "We're like super close. He even asked me to help build the characters of Anatis and Lady Noir because of how close I am to them,"
 "Girl, that is so cool," Alya gasped as she listened, completely entranced by it. "Will you be going to the premier?"
 "Of course, I will," She grinned as they joined the line at the canteen. "Thomas gave me and my mama VIP passes to thank me for my help,"
 "Oh wow, girl, that is so cool," Alya gasped as she helped Lila carry her food to the table. Marinette rolled her eyes as she sat down and took out her food as Rose, Juleka and Ivan joined her. Max, Alix and Kim had headed to their own little table as Nino joined them. 
 "How can Alya believe her?" Rose asked as they began to take out their lunches. Juleka shrugged as Nathaniel and Marc joined them. 
 "You'd think that she would at least take what she said with a pinch of salt like the rest of us," Nathaniel sighed as Marc handed him a sandwich. He thanked him and kissed him on the cheek, making the writer blush a little as the others shrug. Marinette sighed as she took out her lunch as Adrien and Chloe joined them as well. She shot them a smile before turning back to the discussion.
 "She is blinded to the truth because her desire to be successful overrides her common sense," She sighed, frowning. She was still friends with Alya but the girl had been avoiding her since the visit to the museum but according to Nino, Marinette wasn't the only person on her shit list. She had been avoiding him and told him that they should take a break. Naturally, Nino had been upset at first but he regained freedom, meaning he could focus more on his friends and work but him and Marinette knew that her shit list wouldn't last long. She'd get lonely from Lila been constantly busy with her 'commitments' and would soon come back to them. Though Marinette wasn't sure if she was going to jump back with her friendship with her. However, she would deal with that when it comes. She bit into her sandwich as Marc and Nathaniel discussed the next issue of their comic in hushed voices. A few minutes later, Luka walked in with Kagami and to her surprise, Felix. Marinette wasn't sure how to react to him as they came over to their table. However, Adrien jumped up and hugged his cousin, clearly happy to see him.
"Felix, how was your classes?" He asked, dragging his cousin into the seat next to him as Kagami grabbed the other. Luka took his usual seat next to Marinette as Felix began to tell Adrien about the classes and how welcome everyone had made him feel. Luka began to talk to Marinette, who happily listened to him until Lila approached their table, causing everyone to go quiet as they glanced at her.
 "Hi, everyone," She grinned, her eyes lingering on Luka for a few minutes. He instantly teased up, feeling uncomfortable with her expression. Marinette, however, slipped her hand in his, making him relax a little as he tightened his hand around hers. Lila gave them a false smile before turning her attention to Felix. "Hi, I'm Lila. I'm a really good friend of Adrien's so let's be friends,"
 Felix didn't even speak a word but truth be told, he didn't need to. His aura instantly became colder and he shot her a glance of pure ice, sending shivers down everyone's spin. Alya frowned as she came over, seeing Lila looking shocked. 
 "Wow, talk about rude," She muttered, making almost everyone roll their eyes. "Lila is just trying to make friends,"
 "Firstly, don't you dare talk to me so causally, Miss Cesaire and secondly, I have no interest in befriending someone who is so fake that she makes Kim Kardashian look real," Felix declared in an extremely harsh tone, causing Alya and Lila to look like they had been hit by a wet fish and everyone else to laugh. Nathaniel even shouted out 'burn', Adrien, however, cleared his throat, making everyone look at him, getting a nod of Kagami.
 "Since everyone is here and I consider most people here friends... not you, Lila..." Adrien stated, causing the Italian fox to gasp as he singled her out. "I have something important to say and I want to tell my friends before it goes viral tonight. Me and Kagami are officially dating,"
 Most people cheered but two people didn't. Lila and Alya. Naturally, Lila didn't as she glared small daggers at everyone but Alya looked like she had been betrayed.
 "What?!" She gasped, making everyone look at her. "You're dating the ice queen?!"
 "Alya!" Marinette gasped, causing Alya to look at her. "Kagami isn't an ice queen. She's actually really nice,"
 "Aren't you even bothered by this?!" She gasped, surprised that her best friend wasn't freaking out. The girl had a massive crush on Adrien after all and she should be hurt to find out he's dating someone else, especially someone like Kagami but Marinette apparently wasn't. Instead, she looked happy for them. It baffled Alya so much. She grabbed Marinette's arm, surprising her and pulled her aside. Luka looked like he wanted to follow her but Marinette shook her head, turning her attention to her. 
 "What?" She asked, crossing her arms. Alya bit her lip.
 "Aren't you heartbroken?" She asked, making Marinette sigh and shake her head. She wasn't heartbroken because she never really loved Adrien in the first place. She understood she had liked him a lot but she also understood that she had placed him on a pedestal but since her realization and the talk she had with him, she had removed the last bits of him from her life. She had finally put sunshine yellow where it should be. With her but as her friend. "Mari, you can be honest with me,"
 "I am been honest," Marinette sighed, pinching her nose. "I am happy for Adrien and Kagami since I have moved on from him,"
 "Girl, you moved on from him?" Alya asked, confused. "Since when?"
 "It's been happening for a while, Alya," She admitted, making the other girl frown. "But I guess the final push was the other day in the museum,"
 "Girl... I'm sorry," Alya muttered, expecting Marinette to be heartbroken but Marinette really wasn't. She shrugged as if it was normal, making Alya stare at her. "You're not... heartbroken?"
 "No," Marinette replied, making her stare at her again. "Alya, Adrien is great and all but honestly, I think he's just a friend,"
 "Right..." She nodded before smiling. "Well then that solves your love dilemma. You can totally date Luka. In fact, I could set it up so you can confess-"
 "Alya, no," Marinette stated, firmly. Alya blinked and looked at her in surprise. "One, I will confess to Luka when I'm ready, which I'm not and two, I don't want to confess to him just yet anyway. I've only just removed Adrien from my heart and I'm not really to tell Luka that I like him. I like our friendship and I certainly don't want to rush this. I don't want him to think he's a rebound from Adrien,"
 "Yeah but that doesn't mean you can't tell him," Alya stated, making Marinette sigh and give her a look. "Alright, alright... I get it but I'm not sure I like Adrien dating the ice queen,"
 "Well, you don't have to," Marinette pointed out, shocking Alya. "Adrien is happy with Kagami and also can you not refer to her as ice queen? She is actually a friend of mine,"
 "What? Since when have you and Kagami been close?" Alya gasped, surprised. 
 "Since Friendship day," Marinette answered, pinching her nose.
 "Girl, is that why you've been blowing me off?" Alya asked, crossing her arms and making Marinette sigh.
 "I haven't been 'blowing' you off," Marinette corrected. "I've been telling you no for babysitting because I'm not a full time babysitter and it's your chore. I don't mind doing it once in a blue moon but not every single weekend. In case, you have forgotten I have things to do,"
 "What things?" Alya asked, clearly not impressed by Marinette's answer. "Also you babysit Manon,"
 "Yes, I do because I get paid for it," She replied. "And I have commissions to make and homework to do. I also have the duties of been the class representative, which you should be helping with given that you're suppose to be my deputy and on top of that, I have to help my parents with the bakery and like I said I don't mind helping you out occasionally but I can't and shouldn't do it every week,"
 "Are you saying I shouldn't be going on dates then?" Alya asked, clearly annoyed. Marinette rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, mirroring Alya. "Well?"
 "No, I'm not saying that," She stated, making Alya smile. "But you shouldn't be putting your 'dates' above your little sisters. Also it's not healthy to be constantly around your boyfriend,"
 "What do you mean?"
 "You see Nino in school, you're constantly around his or he's around yours after school, you spend the whole weekend together. There's never time for anyone else in either of your lives. I mean you literally invited yourself along when Adrien wanted to spend time with Nino. That is not cool, Alya," Marinette explained, making Alya roll her eyes. "Alya, I'm serious. You say I've been blowing you off but whenever I ask to hang out, it's either 'I can't. I'm with Nino' or 'can Nino come along?' and when I have agreed, you just completely blank me and act like you're on a date with Nino. Basically, I end up third wheeling,"
 "Oh, it's not that bad," Alya gasped but then Marinette began to reel off all the times they had hung. All of them consisted of going to places for couples and her ignoring Marinette to pay attention to Nino. Alya bit her lip as Marinette showed her the texts of their arrangements. There were even ones where Marinette said she wanted a girl's day out and she brought Nino along or when Marinette suggested it should just be them and Alya would have a go at her, asking her if she disliked Nino. "Well... ok... maybe I have been a bit strong on the whole dating thing but I care for Nino..."
 "Which I'm not doubting," Marinette confirmed. "But this behavior is why you two are taking a break, Alya. It's ok to have a life separate from your boyfriend. You know that right?"
 "Well... I guess...." Alya frowned, rubbing the back of her neck before glancing over at the Italian, who was attempting to make small talk with everyone. She even went to sit down next to Luka but he put his legs on the seat and told her that it is taken while glaring at her. She didn't get why he didn't like her. After all, Lila was just trying to make friends. "It's just Lila mentioned that if a couple doesn't spend all their time together, they end up breaking up,"
 "And you believed her?" Marinette asked, clearly annoyed at Lila been mentioned. Alya nodded and Marinette sighed. "Right, of course you did,"
 "Marinette, what's that suppose to mean?"
 "Nothing," Marinette grumbled before sighing. "Look, just take Lila's advice with a pinch of salt. Not everything she says is law,"
 "Um... right..." Alya sighed, not wanting to get in an argument about Lila again. She shook her head before smiling. "So why don't me and you have a girly night tonight?"
 "I can't," Marinette admitted, making her frown. "I'm hanging out with Luka and the rest of Kitty Section,"
 "Oh really?" She asked, wiggling her eyebrows. Marinette rolled her eyes but she was smiling a little.
 "It's nothing like that," She replied, making Alya snort. "We're just watching a movie together and it's not like we'll be along,"
 "A movie together eh?" Alya grinned as the bell rang, causing Marinette to jump and drag her off to their next lessons. The rest of school went by really quickly, which Marinette was grateful for. She collected her homework and rushed over to the lockers, ignoring Lila who send her a sneer. She grabbed her bag and books, said a quick goodbye to Alya and rushed out of the locker room. She made her way home and quickly greeted her parents before rushing upstairs and dropped off her books before getting changed. Once happy with her outfit, she ran downstairs and said goodbye to her parents before heading to the Seine where she was meeting rest of Kitty Section. She saw Luka first and waved at him, causing him to smile and wave back. Juleka was leaning on the wall next to him but Ivan, Mylene and Rose weren't there yet. Marinette ran over and greeted them.
 "Hey," Luka smiled as she pushed a bit of her hair aside. Juleka instantly smirked as she glanced at them, making Luka feel nervous before he cleared his throat. "I like your dress..."
 "Oh... thanks," Marinette smiled as she looked down at it. It was a simple pink dress with her signature flowers across the skirt area. She had paired it with her normal jacket and a pair of ballet pumps. Her hair was in her usual style and she had the purse she had made from her Nonna's gift with her, which Plagg was inside, happily sleeping. Luka had also changed his outfit. He had a different band shirt on and his usual ripped jeans but he had switched his hoodie for the jacket she had made him, making her smile when she realized he was wearing it. "You don't look too bad yourself,"
 "T-Thanks..." He flushed, looking a little nervous. Of course, that made Juleka snort and call him a nerd. In reply, he stuck his tongue out at her before facing Marinette. "Are you ok after your talk with Alya?"
 "Yeah, I am," She smiled as Rose got there. She instantly squealed over Marinette's dress, making both of the Couffaine roll their eyes before she moved over to Juleka and leaned against her, muttering about how pretty it is. "I could make you one if you want, Rose,"
 "Oh my gosh!!!" Rose gasped, practically fluttering. "Yes!! How much would it be?"
 "Um... well... I'm not sure..." Marinette admitted. The only person who had really paid for her work was Jagged. Luka frowned and looked at her.
 "You don't have a commission list?" He asked, making her blink and shake her head. "You really should, Marinette. I bet lots of people would buy from you. I know I would,"
 "Me too!!" Rose gasped as Juleka nodded. "Oooh, we could help you make a website, where we could show off your designs!!"
 "Oh... wow... I mean...." Marinette gasped, flushed at the idea of having her own website and showing off her designs. She was especially flushed at Rose's enthusiasm. Not that she didn't appreciate it but Rose was very intense. Luckily, Ivan and Mylene turned up and Rose refocused her energy on seeing the film but her little out burst had given Marinette food for thought. She could make her own website and showcase her designs.
 ~Later that Evening~
 "Thanks for walking me home, Luka," Marinette smiled, gently kissing his cheek. Juleka and Rose had gone back to the Liberty and Ivan had taken Mylene home, leaving Marinette to head home. Luka had insisted on walking her back which she happily agreed to. He went to tell her it was no problem but before he could, her parents appeared at the door and insisted he could in for a little bit. Apparently, her dad had tried out a new cake recipe and wanted an outsider's opinion on it. Marinette giggled as he practically dragged Luka into the kitchen, asking if he was allergic to anything. When Luka told him he wasn't, Tom practically squealed and gave him a slice of cake. Luka tried it as Marinette took a seat.
 "Wow," He gasped, making Tom smile. "This is really good, Mr Dupain,"
 "Oh, you can call me Tom, son," Tom grinned, making Luka nod. "You really like it?"
 "Yeah. It's just the right amount of sweetness and really fluffy too," Luka smiled, taking another bite. "Are you going to make it available for sale?"
 "We're trying it out at the premier of the Anatis and Lady Noir film," Tom explained, making Luka blink and grin. "You see it's made with coconut instead of almonds as the direction is allergic to nuts. I'm told that it's not too serious but as a baker, I have to be careful with these things. Oh, do you want to try one the macarons as well?"
 "Sure," Luka smiled, getting a giggle of Marinette as Sabine came through and greeted him. "It's really cool that you get to cater at the premier,"
 "It is," Sabine smiled as Tom gave Luka and Marinette a plate of macrons. "It's a really good opportunity for us and we're very excited to go. There's going to be loads of celebrities there including the Agrestes and of course, Jagged Stone,"
 "Yeah, he mentioned he was going," Luka nodded causally, making Tom and Sabine look at him in surprise. He forgot not everyone knew about Jagged been his dad. "Oh... um... Jagged is... a friend of my mum... Yeah..."
 Sabine giggled as Luka looked nervous before continuing the conversation as Luka and Marinette ate their macarons. Jagged had mentioned going to the premier, even inviting Luka to it but Luka wasn't sure it was a good idea so he turned it down but promised to let Jagged know if he changed his mind. He had also been invited as Anatis, along with Lady Noir but both decided to turn that down too. While they were flattered, they agreed they shouldn't go as they were superheroes, not celebrities. Luka finished his macaron and grabbed a couple of more as Tom began to go over the list of the things that had been ordered. He slipped one into his pocket for Tikki when no one was looking before munching on a few more. They were really good.
 "We need 600 maracons 800 petits fours, 1000 Pain au chocolat and that's not even mentioning the Anatis and Lady Noir three-tier cakes," He sighed before glancing at Luka. "Those maracons taste good?"
 "Yes sir," He smiled. "They're really good,"
 "Excellent," Tom smiled before turning to his wife, who was frowning.
 "That's a lot of food," She sighed before looking at him. "Maybe we should hire someone to help us serve all this food at the premier,"
 "I can help," Marinette stated, causing them to look at her. "I can totally help with that!"
 "You mean... as a server?" Tom asked, looking at her with uncertainty and surprise. It's not that he didn't believe that she wasn't capable. It just that Marinette was super clumsy and any damages or accidents would be taken off the bill. "Are you sure, sweetie? You'd walk around and serve people maracons?"
 "I can do it," She grinned, holding up a plate with fruit to prove her point. However, she ended up misplacing her footing and falling. Luckily, Luka jumped up and caught her as well as the plate, holding it perfectly. The fruit wasn't as lucky. Marinette blushed and muttered a thanks as her parents shared a look, making her frown. "You don't trust me?"
 "Of course we do, sweetie," Sabine reassured as she put down the plate and began to pick up the fruit with Luka. "It's just-"
 "I'm such a klutz," She sighed, frowning. "Yeah, I don't trust me either..."
 "Of course, you're not a klutz and we do trust you," Tom smiled, placing his hand over hers. "You're hired but there's going to be a lot to do so I hope you're prepared for a busy day,"
 "Of course, papa!" Marinette grinned as Luka bit his lip, straightening up and place an orange on a table. "And I'll be super careful!"
 "I... I could help as well?" He muttered, making the three of them look at him. "If you want..."
 "That would be great," Tom smiled, making Marinette grin. "Two helpers are even better then one but are you sure you won't be busy that day? We don't want to intrude on your life, Luka,"
 "It would be no trouble at all," He smiled, making Marinette grin. "I don't have much experience as a waiter but I know a little about it. I work as a delivery boy a couple of days a week,"
 "Well then, you're hired," Tom grinned. "With you two as our servers, this will be so much more easier,"
 "Ooh, I'll can make you a waiter's outfit!!" Marinette gasped, making Luka smile. "We'll so professional! It's going to be a blast!"
 ~Evening of the Premier~
 "So put your thumbs here and look straight ahead," Tom suggested as he got Marinette to hold an empty plate. Luka had already grabbed a plate and was walking around serving them. He was dressed in a classic waiter's outfit that she made that actually matched her. Something which was his suggestion. It had surprised her but she was more then happy to make them match. For her, she wore a black shirt with puffy, short sleeves and a baby pink skirt. The shirt's sleeves had white cuffs and a white collar with white buttons and she had added an apron and a head dress that had baby pink frills on it and her signature flower dress. She had completely the look with comfortable, black shoes and polka dot tights. She had also put her hair in a bun instead of her normal style. Luka's outfit was a lot more simple to make then hers. He wore black trousers with a matching black waistcoat and bow tie. Like her shirt, the waistcoat had white buttons and his shirt was the same shade of pink as Marinette's shirt. He had a short apron around his waist with her signature flower design was place on the edge of it. On his feet, he wore completely black converses, giving the outfit his own personal touch. He had even gelled his hair back for the occasion. She watched him, walk around with confidence before turning to her father, who looked nervous, making her sigh. He was convinced that she would trip and fall when trying to serve people. Though she didn't blame him for that, she wanted him to actually trust her. She looked at the empty plate before sighing.
 "Shouldn't there be maracons on here?" She asked, frowning. Her parents gave each other a look, making her frown before her mother cleared her throat.
 "Of course," She smiled nervously. "We'll put them on when you're ready,"
 "Dad, Mum.... I am ready," She gasped, frowning. She couldn't help but feel a little bit embarrassed by their actions. She understood why but she also believed she could do this. "I promise I'll be super duper careful,"
 "Well... ok but don't be shy to ask for help," Her mother stated, making her father nod and give her a plate of macarons. She took a deep breathe and began to walk over to some of the guests. However, she misplaced her footing and tripped, causing her to spin and move in a wild motion as she tried to regain her footing and not drop the macarons. Meanwhile, Luka was having no problems as he walked around, serving people. He gave them a charming smile and easily moved about, offering people the macarons. He moved passed Jagged Stone and some other guy to go get a second tray but Jagged called his name upon seeing him and pulled him other, introducing him to the person he was talking to.
 "Tom, this is Luka. He's a fantastic musician and can really play the guitar," Jagged grinned, holding his arm around Luka's shoulders as he went bright red as Jagged sung his praises. Luckily, most people weren't paying attention but he better stop Jagged soon before he let the cat out of the bag so to speak. They weren't ready to go public with that yet. "Luka, this is Thomas Astruc... he's the director of Miraculous: The adventures of Anatis and Lady Noir,"
 "It's nice to meet you, sir," Luka smiled, making the direction smile a little as well. "Would you excuse me though? I'm actually working here tonight,"
 "Oh, so that's why you're dressed up," Jagged grinned as Marinette tripped up. Both Jagged and Luka went to catch her but Jagged caught her first. "Whoa, Marinette,"
 "You ok?" Luka asked as Jagged helped her to her feet before pointing to her and telling Thomas Astruc who she was. He showed him the glasses she designed and explained she had designed his album cover, Rock Giant, making her blush and giggle nervous. Thomas Astruc complimented her and she offered him some macarons but a number of people grabbed them before he could. Luka and her returned to the table and grabbed fresh trays each before moving around and serving them. Luka always gave her a smile when they cross paths, making her feel more confident as she moved around. She happily talked to Adrien and Kagami when they came in and greeted Chloe when she saw her. Chloe had wore a beautiful dress that was golden in color and even had her hair down with a tiara on it. Marinette had gushed over the gown and how beautiful she looked, making the heiress blush. Luka frowned as he noticed Mr Astruc was not having a good time. A number of people were ignoring him as he tried to talk to them and everytime he tried to nab a macaron from Marinette's tray, someone else beat him to it. Seeing that he looked upset, Luka walked over and held out the tray of maracons. "Here you go, Mr Astruc,"
 "Ah thank you," He smiled, taking one and munching on it. "Hmm delicious,"
 "No problem, sir," He smiled as he took a couple more of him. "If you want anymore, just let me know,"
 "I will do," He smiled as Luka walked away. A few more people took the rest and he walked back to the main table to get a fresh tray, giving Sabine and Tom a smile. He walked off and continued his work. However, the sound of a false laugh caught his attention. He looked over and saw Lila Rossi stood talking to a number of people. She was wearing an orange and white dress. It was nice but it was clear she had themed her outfit around her akumatized self. The dress itself started orange and faded into white. It had a cut out area around the middle that allowed her ribs to show a little. The top half of the dress was connected to the lower part by white lace. The lower half of the dress was short at the front and longer at the back. She wore white lace shoes with a matching white purse. However, she had left her hair in her normal style and wore light orange lip gloss. She had even wore her fake miraculous around her neck. He walked away, heading towards Marinette to warn her as Lila happily chatted away. He walked over to her and was just about to tell her when Lila strutted over.
 "Luka! Hi!" She gasped, clinging onto him. "Oh my gosh! I had no idea you would be here. Are you watching the premier?"
 "Lila, let go of me," He declared, pulling his arm away from her as she frowned. "I'm working and I believe I had made it very clear that I am not interested in been your friend or did you forget that you declared war on me?"
 "Oh, well... I didn't mean it," She gasped, going to grab his arm again. "I was just caught of guard because how mean Marinette-"
 "Marinette wasn't mean to you," He corrected, pulling away from her again. "Now if you excuse me, I have work to do,"
 With that, he walked away, making her scowl as he moved over to Marinette. It was then she noticed the matching outfits, releasing he must be helping out her family. She turned on her heel to go spin her stories to make her feel better but then she saw Adrien with Kagami. With the ice queen there, she knew she had no chance at getting close to Adrien. It made her growl even more. Why the two boys, who would look great on her arm and help her climb the social ladder, bothering to spend time with those losers when they should be trying to get her attention? She growled to herself before taking a seat and crossing her arms. The more she watched them the angrier she got but then an idea popped into her head. This was the perfect chance to ruin Kagami and Marinette. She got up and walked over to Marinette, who glared at her but served her a macaron anyway. She took it and bit into it before making a face.
 "This macaron is awful," She gasped, making Marinette frown. "What's in this?"
 "It's made with coconut instead of almond, Lila," Marinette deadpanned. "And no one else has complained,"
 "Oh my gosh! You know I'm allergic to coconut, Marinette!" She gasped, falsely. "Are you trying to poison me?"
 However, Marinette didn't bite the bait. Instead, she just sighed in clear annoyance.
 "No, Lila, we had special orders to make them like that as Mr Astruc is allergic to almonds," She stated, making Lila frown. "If you don't like them or really are allergic then don't eat them,"
 With that, she walked away and continued to give out the macarons, making Lila annoyed. She walked over to Adrien and tried to insert herself into the conversation but both Adrien and Kagami walked away before she could even begin to talk. She growled to herself again and took out a piece of gum before chewing on it as she watched everyone. She saw Marinette brief loose her balance but she caught herself, making Lila frown. She was hoping she would have fallen over. She also noticed the director of the movie been chased by little kids while Kagami and Adrien talked with Chloe. She blew a bubble with her gum before smirking as Marinette began to walk by her. She stuck out her foot, causing Marinette to try and spin as she tried to not to spill anything. Lila then got up and walked over to the table, grabbing a slice of cake. She placed it down on a chair and put it on a chair near Adrien and Kagami, smirking to herself. She didn't care who sat on it because she would just blame it on Marinette but it would be great if it was Kagami. Speaking of the ice queen, she took out her gun and dropped it subtly as she walked past Adrien and Kagami. She smirked as she heard Kagami say something about the gum on her shoe but she had one other thing to do. She slipped out of the cinema and headed to the nearest bakery before buying a couple of passion fruit macarons. They were Adrien's favorite flavor and the perfect item to frame Marinette for. She flashed her pass and walked back inside, just as Mr Astruc sat on the chair was the cake on. Apparently, he was so worn out with the children annoying him that he didn't notice the cake. She smirked to herself and unwrapped the passion fruit macaron before walking over to him as he let out a sigh.
 "Oh my... are you ok?" She asked, making him look at her. "You look so stressed. Here, why don't you have this? I was going to have it myself but you look like you need it more then I do,"
 "Oh, thank you," He smiled, taking the macaron from her and eating it, failing to notice the smirk on her face. "Ah Passion Fruit. One of my favorite flavors but I usually can't have it because of my allergies to almonds. I'm so glad the bakery I hired made a coconut alternative,"
 However as soon as he said that, he felt his skin itch, causing him and Lila to gasp as red blotches appeared on his skin.
 "T-That was a coconut alternative right?" He asked, making her gasp.
 "I think so but I did find it in this wrapper," She gasped, making him take the wrapper off her and sniff it. He then stormed over to Mr Dupain and demanded to know why some of the macarons had almond in them. Lila then tried to dropped the hint that maybe Marinette was responsible since Passion Fruit happens to be Adrien's favorite flavor. Instantly, Luka came to her defenses and Marinette denied the accusation but the kids from earlier started to laugh at Mr Astruc as he had sat in the cake. While he told them off and got upset, Lila tried to blame Marinette, only for Kagami of all people to say how she saw Lila holding a slice of the same cake. Adrien also said he saw her leaving the venue briefly, meaning she could have brought the passion fruit macaron and if Marinette did want to give him one, she would have already done since she had talked to them a couple of times already. The final thing that made Mr Astruc storm out was when Lila used her own 'allergies', claiming she got herself some macarons so she could enjoy them too and if she did give one to Mr Astruc, she had done it to be kind but didn't realize he was the director of the show who was allergic. When Marinette tried to say she had framed her, Lila started to cry, drawing attention to her. Luka rolled her eyes and went to say something to Mr Astruc to see if he was ok but noticed the man had disappeared. He frowned and asked one of the security if he had seen him. They pointed him in the direction that the man had gone and Luka followed. He walked into the bathroom and frowned as he noticed one of the cubicles were closed. He walked over and knocked on it.
 "Mr Astruc?" He asked, frowning. "Are you ok? Do you need medical attention?"
 "No, I'm alright," He replied, clearly upset. His heart song was melancholy and a little depressing to hear. "My allergies don't require me to be hospitalized. I'll just have this nasty rash for a couple of days,"
 "Are you sure?" Luka asked. "I don't mind calling an ambulance for you,"
 "No, no... it's fine... you should go back to the party," He replied, making Luka sigh. He didn't want to leave him but he was still working. He left the bathroom and headed back to the main party. Everything had calmed down but he couldn't see Lila anywhere. He walked over to Marinette as she sighed.
 "Where did Lila go?" He asked, hoping she wasn't there anymore.
 "She left," She sighed, frowning. "She gave him a passion fruit macaron, despite knowing he was allergic and couldn't have them. I told her myself. Is he ok? Does he need medical attention?"
 "Apparently not," He replied, explaining what he had told him. Marinette nodded and listened. However, before he could continue, one of the security guards got thrown into the room as a man walked in. He was wearing an ladybug patterned mask but the rest of him looked like pen scribbles. He kind of resembled the director, causing Luka to realize he must have been akumatized. The entire party broke out in panic as everyone tried to get away from the akuma. Luka grabbed Marinette's hand and ran off with her but thanks to other people, he dropped her hand, losing her. He wanted to go and find her but he had to go and transform. He slipped into the fire escape, causing Tikki to fly out before he transformed. He jumped onto the roof and landed on it, frowning as he saw a giant 2D Godzilla, destroying stuff. Definitely one of the weirdest akumas he's come up against. A few minutes later, Lady Noir landed next to him.
 "Well, that is weird," She muttered, making him nod. "Any ideas?"
 "It's Thomas Astruc, the director of Miraculous: Tales of Anatis and Lady Noir," He replied, making her nod. "He's calling himself Animaestro,"
 "Ooh... our film!!" She gasped, grinning before making a thoughtful look. "But you're not really afraid of cats, are you?"
 "What? Of course not," He replied, making her grin happily. "You didn't think I was, did you?"
 "Hey, you could be for all I know," She grinned as they jumped and landed on the roof near the akuma. Anatis threw his yoyo and wrapped it around Animaestro, causing it to turn his attention to them.
 "Anatis! Lady Noir!!" He declared, glaring at them before glowing and changing into some sort of transformer. He fired a beam at Anatis, who jumped back and blocked it with his yoyo before firing at Lady Noir as she tried to sneak up on him. She landed next to Anatis, who was observing. Animaestro changed form again, looking like some old Disney character, declaring himself as the best hero. Lady Noir growled and charged at him but he threw a dark disc that landed on the floor and created a black hole, which she fell in. Anatis threw his yoyo and pulled her from it, landing on the roof as she huffed.
 "I hate cartoon logic!!" She gasped as they jumped away from giant boxing gloves. "How do we beat him?!"
 "The only thing that doesn't change is his mask," Anatis yelled as they ran. "I think the akuma is in it,"
 "Ok so how do we get it?!" Lady Noir replied as Animaestro jumped up and transformed into a woman she recognized as Majestia, declaring something about fearing the power of cartoons. "I like cartoons as much as anyone else but this is ridiculous!"
 "Maybe we just need a little luck to beat him," Anatis grinned before throwing up his yoyo. "Lucky charm!!!"
 A head camera appeared out of no where and he caught it, frowning.
 "Ok... but how does this help?" He muttered, glancing around but nothing lit up. "Kitten, any ideas?"
 "Maybe we need to make our own film?" She asked, making him nod. He pressed record and placed it on his head as Animaestro taunted them before firing eye-beams at them. It caused them to fall into the underground, causing them to groan. "I don't think he likes the idea of competition,"
 "Agreed," Anatis replied, getting up and helping her to her feet. "You ok?"
 "Yes," She nodded, blushing a little before he pulled away and took out his yoyo. Animaestro jumped down in the form of a cartoon ninja and threw a smoke bomb, causing Anatis and Lady Noir to cough as the smoke surrounded them. "I can't see anything,"
 "Protect your miraculous," Anatis ordered as they moved so they were back to back. "He could be anywhere,"
 "Right!" Lady Noir gasped, covering her ring with her hands. She closed her eyes as the smoke got in them before briefly opening them and quickly looked around. She saw Animaestro reaching for Anatis and pushed him out of the way before the two of them jumped back but coughed, looking away from him. They heard someone shout something and heard Animaestro grunting like he was confused, allowing them to throw the weapons at him blindly before a flash told them that he transformed again. They both opened their eyes as the smoke cleared, causing Anatis to frown when he saw Animaestro was gone. Lady Noir also frowned as she looked for him. "Where did he go?"
 "I don't know," Anatis frowned, confused. "Animaestro had the perfect chance to grab our miraculous,"
 "Yeah, we were blinded from that smoke," Lady Noir agreed before frowning. "So why didn't he?"
 "I don't know... It doesn't make any sense," He sighed before glancing up at the camera on his head and taking it off. "Something must of happened that we didn't see but hopefully the lucky charm caught it,"
 Lady Noir nodded as he re-winded and pressed play. She moved closer as the video played. It showed Anatis turning to Lady Noir, telling her to protect her miraculous before turning back. Animaestro jumped out from the smoke but suddenly stopped moving as if the video had been paused.
 "Did you pause it?" She asked, confused.
 "No," He replied, frowning. "Did you see him freeze?"
 "No," She shook her head, looking at him. "I had my eyes closed because of the smoke,"
 "Me too," He muttered, frowning before it clicked. "That's why he couldn't take our miraculous. If no one watching him then he freezes,"
 "Just like a movie," She gasped, looking at him. "If no one is watching it then it's as if it didn't exist,"
 "And now we know how to stop him," Anatis grinned, stopping the film and hooking the camera on his belt before the two of them jumped up onto the streets and onto the rooftops. Anatis blinked as he saw Animaestro had changed into a giant unicorn and was spitting rainbows that turned things into cartoon stars. "This is just weird... Lady Noir, we need to get people stop watching him,"
 "Ok!" She nodded as the two of them jumped down to the cars where people were stood. "Hey! Listen up! You need to stop watching him!"
 "Just because it's colorful and shiny doesn't mean you should watch it!" Anatis shouted, causing a number of people to look away. He spotted the TV van as Nadja exited it with her film crew, causing it to light up in his luck vision. He smirked as he got an idea. "Lady Noir, distract him! I need to go on TV!"
 "You got it, Annie," Lady Noir replied, jumping away. Anatis jumped over and landed in front of the camera, walking up to it as blue blasts came from the area where Lady Noir was.
 "You!" He gasped, knocking on the camera's glass. "Yes, you who are watching me on the other side of the screen. Wherever you are, close your eyes! Do not look at Animaestro! Turn off your screens! Animaestro gets his power from people watching him so help us take him down by taking that attention away from him. We need each and every one of you to do this. It's the only way to defeat him,"
 He frowned as he heard Animaestro laughing behind him.
 "You can tell everyone to shut their eyes and switch of their TVs but there will always be at least one person watching me!" He declared, laughing. "So try all you want, Anatis! I'll still win,"
 "He's right," Anatis muttered to himself. As long as there is one person watching then Animaestro will be able to move but what if they couldn't watch at all? "Sorry, Nadja but there will be no live streaming today,"
 He took out his yoyo and destroyed the camera, breaking it and causing Animaestro to growl before he changed form again. This time he took the form of a magic girl from an anime and fired a special attack at Anatis. He dived out of the way and blocked it with his yoyo as Lady Noir joined him. She summoned her cataclysm, making Animaestro attack them again. They blocked his attack, causing him to growl and shout something about how everyone needs to watch animation.
 "Too bad, we're the last ones!" Lady Noir grinned as they jumped out of the way of another attack. 
 "And once we close our eyes, it will be time for the end credits," Anatis grinned before nodding to Lady Noir. "Ready, Kitten?"
 "You know it, Bugaboo," She grinned, holding her hand. "I trust you,"
 "Then close your eyes," He stated as Animaestro turned into his normal form and dived at them. The two heroes grinned and closed their eyes, freezing Animaestro in place. Lady Noir reach forward and placed her finger on his mask, destroying it before they opened their eyes. Anatis took out his yoyo and captured the akuma before releasing the purified version. He unhooked the camera on his belt and threw it up into the air. "Miraculous Ladybugs!"
 The cure swept through the city, fixing everything and restoring the missing buildings before spinning around Animaestro himself. He turned back into his normal self as the cure disappeared before looking around confused. To their surprise, the cure had actually fixed his allergic reaction to the macaron as well. He blinked and looked up at the heroes.
 "Anatis?! Lady Noir?!" He gasped, clearly excited. "Oh wow... wait... was I akumatized?"
 "I'm afraid so, sir," Anatis replied, making him frown as someone ran over.
 "Mr Astruc!" They called before looking over and pushing their eyes up as they slipped down their nose. "Oh, wow! Anatis and Lady Noir! Thanks for saving the boss,"
 "No problem... um?" 
 "Oh, I'm Sasha Mallard. I'm the writer of Miraculous: Tales of Anatis and Lady Noir. It's so cool to get to meet you," They grinned, holding out their hand. Anatis shook it and smiled before they turned back to Mr Astruc. "Let's get back to the party, Boss. The film's gonna start soon,"
 Mr Astruc nodded and walked off with Sasha, who was happily talking about meeting the two heroes. Lady Noir moved next to Anatis as his earrings beeped. 
 "Ah, I better go," He replied, turning to Lady Noir. "See ya around, Kitten,"
 "Bye, Annie," She grinned before jumping onto the roofs and running off. She returned back to the cinema and rushed over to her family as Luka came from a different direction. She rushed over to him. "Luka! Are you ok?"
 "I'm fine," He smiled as Sasha walked in with Mr Astruc. "Looks like Anatis and Lady Noir saved the day again,"
 "Of course, they did," Marinette grinned as Lila walked by, laughing in a fake manner. "But no thanks to her,"
 "I'm surprised she came back," He muttered, frowning as Mr Astruc walked over to them. "Mr Astruc, I'm glad to see you're not akumatized anymore,"
 "Luka, was it?" He asked, getting a nod of him. "I just wanted to say thank you for checking on me earlier so here. I think you should have my pass to see the film. I've seen it lots of times already,"
 "R-Really?" Luka asked, surprised as he looked at it before looking at Marinette. "No, she should have it. She's been wanting to see it more then me,"
 "Why don't both of you see it then?" Sasha suggested, holding out their pass too. "Like the boss, I've seen it lots of times too so she can have mine,"
 "A-Are you sure?" Marinette asked, getting a grin of Sasha, who nodded. "Oh! Thank you!!"
 "No worries but would you mind if I grabbed some macarons? I was kind of late to the party," Sasha smiled, rubbing the back of their neck. Marinette grinned and grabbed a tray of macarons for them. Thomas took them out of her hand and smiled at them as they dug in.
 "Go and enjoy the show," He grinned, causing Marinette to grab Luka's hand and drag him into the room. They flashed the passes and took a seat next to Adrien and Kagami, who waved at them as the film began. 
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Next Chapter: https://sassyduckqueen.tumblr.com/post/640778021588058112/miraculous-rise-of-anatis-45
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stylishanachronism · 4 years ago
Note
Could I request either dialogue prompt 3 or 11 for whichever characters you feel like make them work?
lmao like a month later, here you go babe, thank you so much for the prompt. 3 was “I can’t see anything.” “Hold on I’ll set something on fire.”
“I can’t see anything.”
“Hold on, I’ll set something on fire.”
Alys sighs at him, but doesn’t protest, hiking Vela higher on her hip. She, he squints, just puts her thumb in her mouth, her other arm tight around Alys’ neck, wide-eyed and clingy to the point her mother can’t put her down, though she’s not looking so steady herself. 
From the half sunk rowboat moored at the end of the rotting dock, this place hasn’t been occupied in years, but a little groping at a likely shadow gets him a crude torch, a replacement for the one mounted at the wall that never got used, better than the broken crate he was expecting.
“It seems awfully empty. Do you think he even came this way?”
“Nowhere else for him to go.” He clicks his sparker together, lucky that was still in his pocket, cursing under his breath as the damp rag won’t catch. She frowns, but not at his language; she’s squinting out into the dark herself, turning so Vela’s away from the stream, closer to the cave mouth.
“See something?”
“Mm. It might be nothing, but- Beodul?” She calls, to no response.
“Maybe it’s the locals.”
“I’m fairly certain the pirates left, dear.”
He clicks his sparker again, pressing it up against the resin this time, and the resulting bloom of light catches on steel, a skeleton wobbling towards them, still dressed in rags and rust.
“Looks like at least one of them didn’t.”
It’s a nasty little surprise, Alys accepting the torch as she backs away, but it comes apart at the barest swing of his sword, which is somewhat alarming, but better it be extra fragile than the other way around. Alys frowns at it, eyes going hazy in a way he doesn’t like for a moment, and then she’s ignoring it again, lifting the torch higher and peering down the passageway. 
The sand’s too mussed to give any hint of which way Beodul went; there’s at least two more bodies, so to speak, in here, from the tracks on the floor, though if he had to put money on it the right fork looks like it’s seen more movement recently.
“Which way, do you think?”
He takes the torch back from her, not the smartest idea, given he’s the one with the sword, but he’s also taller, and it’s awful dark in here, and the extra reach shows what might very well be a boot print in the spill of sand ahead of them.
“Right.”
She lets him take the lead, murmuring to Vela in low tones, trying to coax her sweet again, at a guess, she’d never much liked the dark before all this shit happened, but she screamed when they tried to leave her behind, and Alys is just as clingy, considering, so it wasn’t like she resisted too hard, and he follows the bootprints as best he can, pausing at another fork. This place must be a misery when the tide comes in, given the rotting bridges everywhere, light from some distant crack in the roof enough for him to know they aren’t setting foot that way, that particular bridge well out, but there’s a passage ahead, and another squeezed between that one and the water, and nothing in the sand to say which one’s a better bet.
“Beodul?” Alys calls again, coming up to his elbow, free hand cupped around her mouth, and it’s hard to tell, what with the echoes, but he thinks the answering cry comes from ahead of them. It sounds pained, or at the least terrified, so with a quick glance at Alys, whose mouth has set in a grim line, clearly they’re thinking the same thing, he presses forwards, passing the torch back to her as he goes.
The skeleton that comes careening out of the dark is not Beodul, but it is wearing boots. A boot. Its friend has the other, its breastplate buckled in in a way that makes a frankly horrible noise every time it moves, the same noise that brought them this direction, he realizes, so at least if Beodul isn’t dead, he wasn’t screaming either. 
It’s a trickier fight than the last, there’s two of them this time, and he can’t back up, or see much of anything, so it’s luck more than anything else that lets him shoulder one of them into the wall hard enough it crumbles before it can get past him. He catches a glimpse of Alys stomping its skull in from the corner of his eye, something about the way she moves unsettling and strange, but he doesn’t get a good look, and can’t spare the attention anyway, as the one in the breastplate, the one still standing, claws at his face. At least it doesn’t have a sword, like the other one did.
One of them is a simpler proposition, even though he still can’t see shit; he feints for its knees and then smashes its skull askew, ducks as it doesn’t give up and grabs at him again, and settles for doing some grabbing himself, hooking his fingers under its jawbone and yanking until it comes to pieces. Alys stumbles in his peripheral, Vela sliding off her hip with a wail, but they’ve both got their feet under them by the time the skeleton collapses into itself and he’s able to turn around.
Alys is chalky, what little color she’d regained well gone, the graze on her temple dark and sticky again, and she’s ice cold when he catches her chin to get a better look, but the torch is still steady in her hand, and it looks like she just moved too fast or something, since the graze is already clotting up again, so that’s something, at least. 
“You’re alright?”
“Should be asking you that, Nineteen.”
Her smile’s more like a grimace, but it counts.
“I’m fine.” 
She pulls away then, ducking to check on Vela, whose eyes are wet and whose lip is wobbling, but otherwise looks unharmed.
“Sweetheart?”
Vela bursts into tears, flinging her arms around her mother’s shoulders again and smearing her snotty face into her neck, Alys rocking back on her heels to catch her.
“Oh, my heart.”
He takes the torch back so she can gather the girl close, stroking her hair and murmuring to her as she cries, keeping watch.
“Do you want to go back to the beach? We have to stay and find Master Beodul, but I’d feel much better if you were safe outside.” She asks, cupping her cheek as her sniffles peter out. Safe… isn’t the word he’d use, between the wildlife and the fact she’d probably be the healthiest person at their little camp, for all she’s six years old, but it’s a tossup, considering what they’ve found in here so far.
“No!” She shakes her head vehemently, braids flying, and Alys gives him a helpless look. 
“Vela—“
“No!!!”
She’s back near tears again, probably also on the verge of screaming her head off again, which is really the last thing they need, and Alys pulls her back against her shoulder, listening intently as her daughter sobs her way through her fears. He can’t actually understand what she’s saying, for the most part, though Alys is looking distinctly alarmed as it goes on, but he’s had the ‘what if Mama doesn’t wake up?’ discussion with her enough times over the last month he can guess the gist of it.
“Oh, Vela.” She sighs, when she starts crying too hard to speak. “Oh, my girl.” She cradles her head, stroking her thumb along the line of her skull. “Not even the gods know what might happen tomorrow, but I promise I will always do my best to come home to you.”
She gives him another look, cutting her eyes away behind him as she lifts her again, and yeah, if they have to settle Vela he doesn’t really like this spot to do it.
The skeletons came out of a sharp turn in the wall, opening into a small chamber, the main passage veering away to join the other one, he thinks, lining up the space in his head. If they died here, the evidence is long gone; from the waterline on the posts holding up the platform that covers most of the room, this place floods most every day, at least. It’s rotting like everything else in here, but it holds his weight when he tries it, and he’s half again as heavy as Alys and Vela together so that should be fine. This was where the previous occupants slept, if he had to make a guess, or maybe where whoever was in charge did their work, since there’s a table, mildewed papers strewn across it, and a rickety chair that amazingly doesn’t look like it’ll collapse into dust if he drops them in it, though he leans on it himself just to be sure, but it might have been something else, given the piles, probably once neatly organized, around the edges of the thing. 
Vela has progressed into hiccuping by the time Alys sits down, looking highly dubious about the state of the platform and everything on it, settling Vela into her lap and holding her close as she starts to hum, and he leaves her to it, kicking through the mouldering treasures stacked along the wall of the platform instead. Most of it’s beyond salvaging; blackened paintings that tear at a breath, bolts of fine fabrics rotted into a single mass, sacks of what was probably grain gone to dirt, but there’s a little coin, a handful of jewelry, some deeply tarnished silver candlesticks, and the candles themselves are fine, poured beeswax tapers that were probably tied neatly into bundles at some point, but no longer, and at the back, half buried under the rest of it, a pile of something wrapped in sturdy oilcloth, miraculously preserved against the elements. 
“Something interesting?” Alys comes to lean on him, Vela clearly feeling better, looking over his shoulder as he drags it out, and then her fingers tighten into his shirt as she gets a good look at it.
“You know what it is?”
She leans further forward, Vela, quiet again, squeezing between them to cling to his shirt too, and he can hear the smile in her voice as she starts listing it off.
“Three, no, four bolts of dyed wyrwool broadcloth from the Pearl Coast, out of a lot of two hundred, two bolts of violet from the Pales, out of a lot of ten, a special order for…. someone from the Republics, I don’t recognize the name, and a bolt each of samite and cloth-of-silver, from a Master Caligari’s workshop in Old Valia, from the same order.”
“How do you figure that?” She’s a Watcher, sure, but no mind hunter, and this is a bit of a stretch.
“Aelere’s always been thorough. And you ought to recognize Aloth’s spellwork, honestly.”
He leans forward, careful, and yeah, now that he’s looking it’s familiar, not that he could have placed it, but she seems certain, except-
“Aelere?”
“My cousin. I’ve not gone mad, stop fretting.” She stands up again, tugging Vela away so he can get to his feet as well.
“How’d Aloth get involved, then?”
“He had a very expensive education, and he’s good at this sort of thing; she probably bullied him into it on one of his visits.”
“Like you bullied him about the rations?”
“That was just common sense. He needed to eat too, so he might as well have gone to the effort.”
The second he’s standing, Vela’s back to clinging, one hand fisted in his shirt, the other tight in her mother’s skirts, like the minute she couldn’t see him’s convinced her he’ll up and vanish on her, which is not going to be doable once they’re out of this nook. Which. On the off hand, he’d really like to find Beodul and get the Hel out of here before anything else happens, but Alys sitting down for a longer spell is probably a better idea, she’s still an icon of Berath, but breathing, and they really ought to see if there’s anything left in those papers, maybe get an idea of what the Hel even happened in here before they run headlong into it. Given her luck he wouldn’t even be surprised by a dragon somewhere in this mess.
“I don’t think a dragon could get in here, Edér.” She sighs, letting him shuffle them back to the table, clearly having read the look on his face. Vela’s brows draw together, but her eyes aren’t wet, good, so she’s probably thinking about her little friends, who won’t be too big to fit anywhere until the rest of them were all long dead and gone.
“Not the kittens, my heart.” Alys agrees, dropping back into the chair and peeling open the logbook set pride of place in front of her, wafting a dirty, vegetablely scent that makes Vela scrunch her nose and press closer to him. He snags a scrap of parchment for himself, pinned to the desk with a pitted, rusty eating knife; wasteful, that, the point would’ve never been the same even before whatever the Hel went down happened. The handwriting’s atrocious, even without the bleed, and the mildew’s not helping any neither, but the gist of it seems to be somebody was pissed and proper worried about something the headman, whatever they called him, had bought as added security, plus the fact that they apparently don’t have an Aloth to hand to keep the tides from wrecking everything.
“Ah.”
“Ah?”
“Well, if we’re lucky, the construct our friend from the storm picked up somewhere will have rusted to pieces.”
So this was that asshole’s stomping grounds. Whatever guilt he might have felt over making off with what wasn’t already destroyed dissolves instantly.
“I don’t know why he picked it up, he was already behind on his taxes and those aren’t cheap to maintain, or easy to control, for that matter.” She wrinkles her nose, probably thinking about the little animat they’d picked up all those years ago, probably still kicking under the rubble of the house. That thing was tough as nails, but clearly this is a different beast.
“Pirates don’t pay taxes.” At least, he’s pretty sure they don’t pay taxes, given the whole ‘outside of the law’ bit.
“Tithes to the Principi council, who mostly use it to maintain their little fort as I understand it. Same thing really. In any case he was well behind on them.” She frowns at his accounting, the wet really hasn’t improved the state of that asshole’s books, then closes it again and pushes it away.
It might just be the torchlight, but it looks like she’s got a little color back when she glances up at him, eyes flickering between the parchment in his hand and his face, and he drops it back on the table.
“Construct probably killed everyone in here, somebody was complaining about it ‘giving them the eye’, best as I can guess. If we see crystals, keep an eye out, apparently it liked them.”
“Adra, not crystals, if I had to guess. I’m no animancer, but I’ve never encountered a construct with a particularly stable or well anchored soul.“
She accepts his hand back up, leaning into his shoulder when she sways on her feet, and honestly he doesn’t know how she’s still standing. She was asleep for a long time, and then the fight, and then the storm, and then they all escaped drowning by the skin of their teeth, and now this shit. She gives him a dry look as she steps away, mouth twisting, but doesn’t say anything, taking the torch back again and tugging Vela to follow, though she scowls and doesn’t let go of his shirt.
“I’m fine, Edér.” She says eventually, leading them back into the tunnel.
“You aren’t, but nothing we can do about that now.”
They make a funny little parade, Alys leading though she ought to be behind him, Vela clutching at them both with a grim determination that would be cute in any other circumstance, and he never liked any of this to begin with but he likes it less now. Hopefully they’ll find Beodul and get the Hel out of here before anything else happens, they’ve got to be running out of cavern if the map he’s put together in his head’s any good.
It’s a little drier, as they get further in, the tunnel sloping up just enough to let things dry out a smidge, which only serves to make the sand slippery, exactly what they needed right now.
The gleam of adra gets him by surprise, knocking him out of his grumbly thoughts as they come around another corner, this time into a proper cavern, and this must be where those assholes lived, not the little one, he can see the remains of a couple of hammocks tangled up with a pile of bones that’s not trying to kill them, heaped up near the dull, dead stone. It’s somehow creepier than the live stuff, sort of empty and shadowed, and really, he hasn’t liked any of this, but this is the last straw. A quick glance says Beodul’s not in here either, and even if there might be information they can come back for it, it’s not like it can end up in worse condition, so he chivvies them towards the tunnel leading out again; it should loop around to meet up with that broken bridge they saw earlier, which now that he thinks about it seems like it might have been Beodul’s doing, so if he’s anywhere, he’ll be there.
They almost make it out. They’re steps from the exit when Alys slips, windmilling back as her legs go out from under her, and what he’d taken for a particularly salty pile of rocks scrapes itself to its feet, lumbering at them faster than they can get past it.
Alys scrambles backwards, the torch flying out of her hand as she grabs Vela and drags her away, and its all he can do not to trip over her himself, doing an awkward little hop that just means when the thing swings at him it’s all he can do to duck, a broken edge on its arm drawing a line of fire across his shoulder, but his shirt doesn’t tear so it can’t be that bad, and he spares a thought for that old door, probably still leaning up against the wall in his cottage, where it does them all a fuck lot of good, as he dodges away from the girls, trying to keep its attention.
It’s limping, for lack of a better word, something wrecked in one of its legs, what he’d taken for salt more like mold, great holes eaten away in its shell, and despite that it’s still faster than he’d like, with more reach, and a sword is not the thing to be fighting it with, but it’s all he’s got so it’ll have to suffice.
The first swing just clatters off it, getting its attention well enough but not actually doing anything, and he has to dodge again as it swings its other arm at him, but the second catches one of those moldy patches and punches straight through, overbalancing him, and it, fortunately, though it nearly takes the sword right out of his hand, and then Alys is singing, whipping the memory of this place into something tangible, and the bones huddled near the adra pull themselves into the semblance of whoever they were before they died.
They, whoever they were, had a gun in life, which is also less than ideal, but it lets him swing around behind the thing and kick another of the moldy patches in, the machinery inside grinding out little sparks where bits of it have rusted nearly together, and the delicate little lattice of adra and copper looks important, so he swings at that, misses, has to back away as it decides he’s a better target than the person it already killed, and Alys makes a horrible, breathless noise and the lattice explodes in a flash of light that leaves purple-green-gold spots in his vision.
There’s a finality to the way the thing crashes back to the floor, solidified when it doesn’t try to get up again, but he doesn’t have time to do more than kick it’s innards away, because Vela is screaming, for real this time. Alys is crumpled on the ground, and for a long, heart-stopping second he thinks this is it, whatever it was she did finally killed her, gods, why did they even come in here, and then she’s scrabbling at the floor, trying to heave herself back up as Vela shrieks in denial, patting at her shoulder as the closest thing to hand.
He has no memory of crossing the cavern back to them, it happens so fast, going to his knees and hauling her to hers, Vela darting under her mother’s arm as soon as she properly reaches for her. She’s lost all color, for true this time, the blood in the whites of her eyes not helping that impression any, staring out into the dark in a way that’d make all his hair stand on end if it wasn’t doing that already. The soft, greenish glow of the adra isn’t helping any, painting everything in sickly shades of grey with the help of the still guttering torch, the blood in her eyes and on her face, nose and temple and her lip is split, to boot, black in the dimness, pupils blown to pits, and she’s breathing like she can’t get any air in her lungs.
“Alys? Alys?”
“Mama!!”
Alys chokes, gasping, and then gives up on talking and flings her arm around his shoulders, fisting her hand in his shirt with an unpleasant squish, dragging Vela to her breast, and starts to cry.
#thank you for meming me!!!#pillars of eternity#risualto#my fic#I got stuck on literally one transition sentence whoops#and then my brain tried to kill me#but on the bright side I got rid of most of the extraneous touching if not the emotional whiplash#look I write precisely two things and neither of them well#and those two things are academic papers and romance novels#touching is a really great shorthand to build chemistry of any sort so I tend to put a lot of it in without realizing#if you hadn't noticed I have extremely detailed headcanons about some really wild shit here you go#this touches on tax law practical wizadry international commerce education and medical care among other things#also bronze disease can't forget the bronze disease#this was supposed to be ~5 lines of a joke about skeletons and now look where we are#related since I know this wasn't clear: both Alys and Vela are reading Eder's mind#but not a one of them realizes it because Alys wasn't given to ciphering before and Vela is a baby#and Eder is canonically Not Great about keeping his thoughts in his own head#look I've got an extensive vaugely scientific thing re: how much soul fits eothas' uh filter#which is a whole thing I won't get into right now#and also if you don't think the image of infant Vela plus the wurmlings curled up in a basket together is the cutest thing...#wurms are baby dragons; wurms form little flocks to keep each other alive when they're small; Vela was also a baby;wurms aren't very smart#therefore yes as far as the wurmlings are concerned Vela is also a wurmling#also yes this just sort of ends I had a real ending but yeah that transition sentence bit me and I was tired of the whole mess#if I ever like edit this properly I'll append it
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diddlesanddoodles · 4 years ago
Text
DUMPLING ch 44
Kol was busy hauling in sacks of flour from storage and Bart had called Saen and Avery to come help him along with the tenderfoots out in the courtyard, leaving just Yale and Quinn in the kitchen with Nenani. Farris had left in a fowl temper to attend a meeting with Donal regarding the upcoming dinner. Apparently, more Lords had sent their intentions to be present and the whole affair was beginning to grow in grandeur and size.
Yale was making some sort of cold sauce made of oil, crushed nuts, and the macerated leaves from a large stalky green that was taller than she was and smelled like a cross between celery and basil. Nenani sat comfortably on a folded tea towel, pulling apart the large nuts and tossing the shells into a waste bowl and the meat into another bowl. The nuts reminded her vaguely of walnuts, but much bigger and had the same sort of oily astringency.
“I don’t care if it’s normal for high-borns,” Yale said, using a little more force than necessary to rip the stalks off of the leafy greens. “Marryin’ off a lil’un is just beyond the pale.”
“Mama said she wouldn’t make me marry anyone,” Nenano replied, trying to assure Yale that she was in no danger of suddenly being married. “She said she doesn’t want me to become someone’ pawn.”
“Well, I’m glad yer Mum’s got a sensible head on her shoulders,” he replied. “Someone need to straighten Lolly’s out for her though. She’s got a bug up her skirts fer sure. Not sure why. Makin’ me nervous though.”
“Me too,” she replied with a grunt as she had to put in a bit of effort to break apart a particularly tough nut.
“So, puttin’ that mess aside fer the moment,” Yale said, reaching for the bowl of shelled nuts and used the flat end of a wooden spoon to smash the soft flesh into crumbs and then adding the lot to the larger bowl of greens. “How’re yer magic lessons goin’?”
“Stopped for now,” she replied. “Maevis is busy making the lanterns.”
Yale turned towards the stone archway, gesturing vaguely to the black lantern hanging just above the lintel. “They put that one in yesterday. Curious to see if it works, but if it never went off, I’d be happy.”
“He says I’ve got a decent enough grasp now that I may not even need the amulet,” she said. “But Mama wants me to wear it all the time anyway.”
“Can’t say I blame her fer that,” Quinn said as he walked up beside Yale, reaching over him to grab a salt cellar, and forcing him to duck down. “Ye scared the lot of us shitless that one time.”
“Oi!” Yale snapped as Quinn retreated and he could straighten himself again. “Ye got salt over there!”
“Empty,” Quinn replied with a careless shrug.
“...so go fill it back up,” Yale retorted with some heat.
“Nah,” the baker smirked and turned around back towards his station. “This one’ll do just fine thanks.”
Yale chased after him, but Quinn seemed to have sensed him and stepped easily to the side as Yale made a grab for the salt cellar. Nenani laughed as they ran about the baking station, Quinn sprinkling salt onto the prepared loaves as he ran and dipped and danced around Yale. “Give it back, dammit!”
“I just need a bit, ye stingey bastard!”
“Use them long legs of yers and go fill yer own up!”
“And I said no thank you!” Watching as the two grown giants banter and fight like children, Nenani sat back and laughed, the mood carrying away the grimmer thoughts that had been congealing in her mind. To the corner of her eye, she saw a shadow descend the servants stairwell, but paid it no mind. A swath of blue fabric caught her eye and she turned to look.
Dressed in the blue coat of the rangers, Thrist stepped down into kitchen and his round coarsely shaven head was turned away from her as he watched Yale and Quinn. But almost as though sensing eyes upon him, his head swerved around and Nenani was suddenly the focus of his two beady eyes. Thin lips curled into a sickening grin. With an arrogant bounce to his gate, he sauntered over to the table and he drew nearer, Nenani glared. Hared.
“Go away,” she told him.
“What? Not even a hello?” he asked mockingly. “Well don’t that just show it then? Ye find out yer a Princess and suddenly yer too good fer us low folk?”
“No,” she replied. “Just you.”
He thrust his hand towards her and she fell back, raising her hand and pulling her magic out. But instead of grabbing her, his fingers dipped into the bowl shelled nuts and grabbed up a handful.
“Don’t flatter yerself, Sparkles,” Thrist snickered with an oily grin. “Ye ain’t worth it. Probably taste like three week old mutton anyway.”
“Better than smelling like three week old mutton,” she snapped back.
His arrogant grin dropped as just before he could retort, there was an angry shout from behind him.
“Oi!” Yale growled as he and Quinn both bore down onto the Ranger. The black haired cook slipped between the table and Thrist and thrust his pal against the ranger’s chest, pushing him back. “Ye fucker got a lotta nerve showin’ yer ugly arse face around here, Thrist.”
“Oh, calm yer tits, Yale,” Thrist sneered, batting Yale’s hand away. “I’m on duty. Ain’t after yer damn pet.”
Quinn swiped at the ranger’s arm pushing Yale away and laughed darkly. “Suppose havin’ to spend three weeks scoutin’ the swamps wasn’t all that fun, eh? Be a shame if ye went and earned yerself another bout of that, eh? Don’t think yer boss would be too happy with ye messin’ with his brother’s ward. Again.”
“Fuck ye both,” Thrist replied, unconcerned with the threat. He cracked a nut and ate it, tossing the shell into the fire and then threw himself hard into one of the chairs. His boots made a dull thud as they planted themselves onto the table only a few yards from where Nenani was sitting.  
“No thanks,” Quinn said, the hard look in his eyes betraying the light lilt of his voice. “But ye can turn yerself right round and go find a nice sunny spot in gurney’s manuer pile. Ain’t that where pigs like to play? Neck deep in shit?”
“Fuck off, both of ye. Like I said, I’m duty. Sweepin’ the grounds fer anyone not belongin’. Suspicious characters and the like.”
“Well, as ye can see, we all belong,” Yale growled. “Now piss the fuck off.”
“And ye fuckers can go back to yer work,” Thrist replied lightly with a shrug. “Rheil and Keral have got us all scrounging ‘round the castle. The Magician sensed something that freaked him out. Supposed to make sure none of his stupid fuckin’ lanterns were on.”
“Well as ye can see, it ain’t. All is well. So do like Yale said and piss the fuck off.”
Thrist made a great exaggerated showing of pondering their words and then shrugged and then cracked another nut and tossed it into his mouth. “Not convinced. What if I leave and it just lights up?”
“Then ye’d be as useless as ye are now,” Yale replied.
“Yer pretty ungrateful ye know that?” Thrist said, folding his hands behind his head.
“Oh? And how do ye figure?” Quinn asked.
“Seein’ as I’m the reason yer pet’s even alive,” the ranger said. “After all that mess with the dragon.”
“Piss off,” Yale snapped. “Keral was the one that found her and brought her back.”
“Aye. After I spotted the thing and reported it to him. Like I say: she’s alive ‘cause ‘a me.”
“So? Do ye want a fuckin’ meddle or somethin’?” Quinn asked.
Thrist grinned. “A silver or two would be nice. A princess is worth that much, eh?”
Both Yale and Quinn looked murderous, but before either could formulate a response, Farris’s voice spoke just outside the stone archway leading out into the courtyard. “That’s what coats are fer ye idiot.”
“I couldn’t find it,” replied a quieter, but familiar voice.
“Does Hev know yer out here?”
“He’s not my mother,” Connar asserted.
“Don’t look that way t’most folk, lad.”
“Oh shut it. I can go where I want….so long as I’m allowed.”
“It’s not the being allowed part ye don’t seem to have a handle on. It’s the physical ability to make it there.”
“I can’t help it if the cold makes it hard to walk.”
“Again. That’s what a fuckin’ coat is fer. Now do ye want to take another trip ‘round this same bush or are ye done with yer tantrum?”
There was a deep sigh. “...yeah, fine. I’m done.”
“Good,” Farris replied just as he stepped down into kitchen with Connar sitting in the crook of his arm. Despite the cold and snow, Connar was only dressed in a pair of thin trousers and a short sleeve tunic. “Because ye was one smart-ass reply away from bein’ dumpin’ back into that snow pile.”
“You wouldn’t.”
“Wanna bet?” Farris grinned darkly, but his eyes pulled away from Connar swept the room before falling onto Thrist. To the ranger’s credit, he hastily pulled his feet off of the table. “Who let in this fucker?”
“No one,” Yale replied. “He just sauntered in like he owned the damn place.”
Farris’s eyes never wavering from Thrist and he said in a low growl, “Ye got three seconds to get out of my kitchen before I shove my foot so far up yer arse you’ll be tastin’ leather fer a week.”
Thrist rose from his seat, clearly taking the threat serious enough. He took a few tentative steps towards the archyway, but keeping a good arm’s distance away from Farris. Nenani eyed him warily but grinned when an idea struck her.
“I just came to tell ye,” Thrist said defensively. “That Maevis sensed somethin’ off. We’re just checkin’ to see if the lanterns are lit. And to let ye know to keep an eye out.”
Nenani pulled a small amount of fire from her amulet, letting the small flame dance in her palm for a few moments before tossing it towards Thrist. It caught the middle portion of his coat, just below his waist. And began to burn. She caught Connar’s eye and shrugged innocently. The blacksmith bit his lip to keep himself from laughing.  
“Message received,” Farris replied. “And seein’ as it ain’t lit, ye can get out. Now.”
“Right,” Thrist replied, scurrying towards the exit. “I’ll just be on my way then.”
“Oh, and Thrist?” Farris said.
“Huh?”
“...yer arse is on fire.”
“What…?” Thrist twisted to look behind him and seeing the back end of his coat beginning to smolder, jumped with a cry of alarm and ran for the archway. “AH!”
Laughter followed him up the stairs and out of the kitchen and into the courtyard. Still chuckling himself, Farris walked over to the table and sat Connar down next to Nenani and ruffled her hair into a fluffy mess. She pushed her hair out of her eyes and looked up to find him grinning at her. “That’s my girl.”
She giggled, trying to put her hair back into some semblance of order. Kol came running down the stairs with a sack slung over his shoulder. “Oi!” he said with a breathless smile. “Who tossed Thrist into the fire?”
“No one,” Quinn laughed. “It was the Dumplin’.”
“Threw a fireball at him,” Yale replied, his words bouncing along with his laugh.
Kol howled with mirth as he laid the sack down onto the bakers’ station table. “He’s out here rollin’ in the snow!”
Beside her, Connar was laughing as well. “Ah, man. If only I could do that. Would’ve come in handy so many times.” He hobbled unsteadily over, greatly favoring his left leg, and plopped down onto the folded towel next to her. Wincing, he reached down to rub his left knee and pulled his trouser leg up to reveal the carved wood beneath. Where the wood ended, a large leather belt began, wrapping around his lower thigh. He popped a few buttons and slid the leg off to reveal the remnants of his real leg. Bright pink scar tissue created a sort of cushion just below his kneecap and there seemed to be a sort of callous where fake leg repeated rubbed against his skin. “Sorry,” he said, pulling his pant leg down. “I just needed to get it off for a bit. I know it’s an ugly thing to look at.”
“So, Farris,” Quinn asked, gesturing towards Connar. “Where’d ye find this one?”
Farris snorted as he dug through a cupboard. “Half frozen in a fuckin’ snow pile.” He pulled out another tea towel and tossed it over to Connar. It unfolded in the air and enveloped Connar completely. It took him a few moments to pull himself out of it’s tangles and wrapped the excess fabric around him.
“Why are ye even outside in this cold?” Yale asked, returning to his original task. “Don’t it hurt yer leg?”
“My leg? Not at all,” Connar replied with a cheeky grin, holding up the wooden leg. “But what’s left of my knee feels like it’s on fire.”
Yale shook his head, but was smiling. “Then why the fuck are ye out here?”
Connar pulled a satchel from behind him and placed it on his lap, patting it with a triumphant grin. “I heard Nenani was down here and I wanted to hand deliver this to her. Wanted to see her face.”
“My belt?” Nenani asked, eye bright.
“Yup. Among other things. I promised you I’d make you something you would love.”
“Oh!” she said, bouncing and holding her hands out. “Let me see, let me see!”
Connar held up a placating finger. “Ah-uh. What’s the magic word?”
“Please?” Nenani asked, but paused, recalling how much he seemed to enjoy Jae’s bribe. “...whiskey?”
Connar stared at her baffled and the grinned. With a laugh, he said, “No. It was please. But I may change it now.”
Flipping open the satchel’s flap, Connar reached inside and pulled out a leather belt as wide as her hand and decorated with intricate motifs. Trees, a mountain, a stream, and in the center, a seven petaled flower. “Here,” he said, flipping it over so show her the inside. “It snaps on, so it won’t be a huge problem to put it on. And you can secure your dagger’s sheath to it here with this flap. It buckles just here...and there’s another on the other side. You know. Just in case.”
He gestured for her to stand and she obeyed, remaining perfectly still as he he wrapped it around her waist and snapped the metal buttons. He hummed. “Hm. A little loose. Hold on a tic, I’ll adjust it. Spin a bit for me.”
She did as he asked and he began to put at the strings at the back of the belt, the leather beginning to tighten snugly against her. “How’s that?”
“Good,” she replied.
“Not too tight?”
“No.”
“All right!” he said, patting her side. “Let’s see you then.”
Nenani stood back, looking down at the belt and with a wide grin, spun around. Yale bent down to inspect it, giving an appreciative whistle.
“It’s a fine piece, lad,” Farris said. “Gen taught ye well.”
“Thanks,” Connar replied and then reached back into his bag. “But I’ve got more.”
“More?” Nenani asked, interest piqued. At Connar’s beckoning finger, she skipped back over to him.
“Let me see your right arm,” he said as he pulled out another piece of leather, tubular, and with similar motifs to the belt. He slipped it onto her arm and used the strings at the side to secure it. He motioned for her other arm as he pulled the second matching piece from the bag. “They’re vambraces. Kind of like the bracers archers wear.”
“Fuckin’ hell, Lolly’s gonna flip if she sees ye wearin’ all that,” Kol said. “Ye almost look like ye ready fer battle there, lass.”
Nenani’s face hurt from how wide her smile was. She looked over at Yale. “I’m gonna wear these to the dinner. The sleeves are long enough you’d never even see them!”
“Good luck with that!” he laughed.
Connar called her back over. “Haven’t even shown you the best part yet. Let me see that amulet of yours.”
She remembered him saying something about getting a better chain for it so she pulled it over her hear and handed it to him. He took a moment to inspect it. “Man, this thing is old. Like...ancient. Where’d you get it?”
“...Maevis took if off a dead mage in the catacombs inside the walls somewhere near the keep,” she replied. Connar looked up at her, giving her a look, but when she did not reveal it to be a joke, he frowned.
“...you’re serious.”
She nodded and he regarded the fire opal amulet with a growing look of unease. “This thing isn’t like...gonna curse me or anything will it?”
“It hasn’t cursed me,” she replied with a shrug and then paused. “At least I don’t think it has.”
“Very reassuring,” he snorted. From within his satchel he pulled out a few tools and with a deft fingers, used a pair of pliers to pull apart the links securing the chain to the amulet and sat it aside. With the amulet in hand, he gestured her forward and when she stood in front of him, he held out the amulet and placed it in the center of her belt. He used the pliers one more time to loop the ends with a link set into the leather and after only a few moments, he leaned back to inspect it. “There. Now you don’t have to worry about that old chain breaking loose.”
She took a moment to admire the whole of her new gifts before leaping at Connar and all but tackling him to the ground. “Oh, hey now! Oof –!”
“I love it!” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck.
“Told you that you would,” he laughed.
“All right, that’s enough,” Farris said. “We’ve got plenty to do without any more distractions. Kol, go get the others and have ‘em all come down here. I’ve got somethin’ ye all need t’hear.”
“Will do,” Kol replied, turning to race back up the stairs. In a matter of minutes, the entire kitchen staff was assembled. Farris looked them all in the eyes and with an irritable grumble, said to them, “Donal’s just told me the guest list fer the dinner just doubled.”
“What?” Yale asked, looking pale. “Doubled? Ye can’t be serious.”
“They’re all coming,” Farris replied, not bothering to disguise his irritation. “Every Duke, Duchess, Earl, and Countess. All of ‘em.”
The answering silence weighed heavily in the air.
“Fuck!” exclaimed Avery, breaking the quiet and yet seeming to capture everyone’s sentiment perfectly. “It’s the weddin’ all over again.”
“Worse,” Farrie replied. “We ain’t got nearly the same amount of time to prep. Donal’s got my list and he’ll be handlin’ the orderin’ and we’ll have twenty tenderfoots to help. Ten of ‘em are the ones that helped out during the weddin’ feast so they’ll at least have some sense of what’s expected of ‘em.”
Connar gave a low whistle. “I don’t envy you boys.”
Kol made an exaggerated moan, leaning heavily against Quinn. “Ugh, please. Someone just throw me off the battlements.”
“Alright,” Quinn smirked, grabbing Kol around the waist and bodily hoisting him up.
“Oi! I was fuckin’ jokin’!” Quinn obligingly sat Kol back down, laughing.
“I’ll trade you places,” Nenani offered Kol. “I’ll stay down here and you can go to the dinner instead.”
“If I thought we’d get away with it,” he said. “I might very well take ye up on that offer, Dumplin’.”
“Don’t think he’d fit into yer dress though,” added Saen with a grin.
“He could just wear it on his hand,” she offered.  
“I’d pay good money to see Kol in a frock,” Avery snickered.
“Aye, I bet you would,” Kol replied with a frown.
“All right then, let’s get to it, lads,” Farris barked, sensing where the conversation was leading. He turned to Nenani. “Best go head on back upstairs, Dumplin’. Donal mentioned yer Mum was lookin’ fer ye.” Nenani made a sad noise of disappointment. “Yale? Go find one ‘a the guards to take her back up.”
“Why can’t I just take the tunnel?” Nenani asked.
Farris eyed her. “Ye heard Thrist didn’t ye? Maevis sensed somethin’. And I ain’t takin’ no chances.” He turned to Saen and waved at Connar as he was slipping his false leg back on. “Saen? Make sure Mr. Observant here gets back to Hev in one piece. Afraid to let him walk back on his own. Might not find him again until spring.”
Connar glared up at Farris. “You’re a real comedian, Farris. You know that?”
“Oh I wasn’t jokin’ none.”
30 notes · View notes
blukrown · 5 years ago
Text
Pride Amongst Siblings
WARNING! This fic contains: attempted roofying/drugging & attempted sexual assualt
If any of these upset you, please do not read!
Also available on AO3
This fic was commissioned by @mrneighbourlove, thank you so much for the support and giving me the chance to write about your character!
"Shit, come back here!" Leere called out to the small figure she was chasing down the busy market streets of Oshmel.
Five minutes after entering the town and she had already gotten lost as well as got her bag stolen. It was rather embarrassing. She might have the thought to shame herself for her naivety if she weren't pelting after the little thief.
Leere had been walking down the crowded streets, map in hand. She had been trying to find her accommodation for the coming evening when a young child had approached her. Clearly a local, the kid offered his help in leading Leere to her destination. She wasn't one to object to a kind offer, especially not when she secretly needed it, so she let the boy lead the way.
Leere had just started thinking about giving the youth a few rupees for his trouble when another kid jumped her. Snatching her rucksack with all of her things and running off, while the first boy vanished into the busy streets.
Although it did take her moment to realise just what had happened, she was soon in hot pursuit of the second child. She might not  be able to punish the bait but at the very least she could recover her things
For how much she was growing to hate the brat, she didn't want to endanger him or other civilians around him by using her magic. She would, unfortunately, have to do this the hard way.
The kid quickly turned out of the busy main streets and ducked into a quiet alleyway. Leere had thought this would give her an advantage with her long legs but the child seemed to have knowledge with the area and still kept a good distance between them.
"Stop! Thief!" Leere called, hoping she might grab anyone's attention. "Get back here dammit!"
The kid kept close to the left side of the alleyway, clearly ready to skid into a turn down a different laneway in the next few paces. But to Leere's great relief, a tall man poked his torso out from the corner, to see what all the commotion was about. And the kid crashed right into him.
Leere restrained a smile as she caught up to the rascal. Catching her breath, she made sure to first snatch her bag back before the little kid could scuttle off.
When Leere turned to thank her unexpected aid, she noticed the stranger seemed unfazed by the collision. He really was also very tall, with at least two heads more height than Leere. Unrecognizable, it wasn't until she looked to the man's face - marked with a wide, excited grin - that she realised who he was.
"Teb?" Leere asked, pleasantly surprised to see her youngest adoptive brother in a place like this.
"Leere!" Tebanam grinned widely, sweeping his older sister into a hug. "What are you doing here?"
"I could ask you the same thing!" Leere answered, welcoming the embrace.  
"So you were going up to Kahmel as well?" Tebanam said with surprise as he finished his meal. "Don't tell me, you were going after the rumoured treasure in the town's shrine."
Leere let out a chuckle, "I'm guessing you had the same idea?"
"Well yeah," Tebanama nonchalantly nodded. "But I was also going up there for research."
"Oh?" Leere said, pausing the forkful of food she was about to eat. "This is about that distant relative of the Gerudo, right?"
"Yeah, the Garai."
Oshmel, the city Leere and Tebanam currently occupied, was a border city. Just a few minutes by cart from the perimeter of Hyrule, this town was a mix of all cultures. It was a city filled with locals, travellers and full of people from nearly every race in the land. The settlement lived at the summit of a great mountain, one which hides within its craters an old, deserted tribal village, known as Kahmel. Some people believe the people who had occupied the village died by a plague, others by wild animals and others still believed they had been cursed. Either way, no one bothered going up the mountain. After all, nothing was up there accept the sad, abandoned ghost town.
For all the travelling the two of them did, this was their first time meeting on the road. Perhaps it was only a matter of time until Leere would run into Tebanam but it did come at a good time.
About half a year ago, Tebanam and Leere - as well as all their other siblings - had returned to Hyrule castle to celebrate the birth of Covarog's first two children. Leere loved being home with her family, she would stay there forever if she didn't feel the call of adventure.
It had been two years since Tebanam had lost Jazoh - a noble boy taken away from court for being caught having a sexual relationship with the young prince - and Leere and her fellow adopted sister Rinku had only meant to help Tebanam.
For being away from Hyrule for so long, the youngest son of Ganondorf had not seemed to recover from the loss of his partner. The sister's had sought to help Tebanam and comfort him. But at some point, they must've upset him.
Leere could not remember the exact reason but Tebanam had stood up - towering over his elder sisters - and looked Leere right into the eyes and spat, "You're only depressed simply because you want attention! My feelings aren't something I can easily turn off like yours, Leere!"
Rinku, furious at Tebanam's statement and intending to defend her sisters, had countered, "She's only trying to help you, Tebanam! You only travel because you lost your fuck toy! As if that's a good way to cope!"
Tebanam had looked furious, but the pain of hearing his eldest's sister's words cut him deep enough to shut his mouth. He only huffed and stormed out of the room, choosing to leave before he said or heard anything more he may regret.
Leere had left before confronting Tebanam about it. Although she didn't say those things, she still should've at least given him a positive farewell.
However, Tebanam happily talked about his travels, Leere could tell that he did not hold any sort of grudge against her.
"Remember that set of armour I gave papa?" Tebanam asked his pompous smirk wide. "He keeps it on display in his office, y'know." Leaning back in his chair, the half Gerudo man puffed out his chest in pride.
Leere let out a snort, "Not last time I was there. Yours was missing the greaves, remember? So it's an incomplete set." Leere loved teasing he brother and by the pitiful bummed out look on his face, she was looking forward to giving him worse. "Mama likes the golden fan I gave her."
Tebanam snorted, "Yeah but what's the point of a fan if you're not going to use it? Mama's not a shower like Papa either."
That shut Leere right up, not that she minded.
Hyrule castle held the largest collection of armour, antiques and artifacts in the land. All starting with King Ganondorf, the passion for treasure hunting had been passed down to many of his children. Both Leere and Tebanam were both proud competitors of a non-existent competition to see who could bring back the best discovery for their parents. As if her parents could love her any less for not finding a prettier treasure than Tebanam, Leere still could not quite let this immature contest go.
"I have a . . . question for you." Tebanam said, distracting Leere from her walk down memory lane. Leere gave an inquisitive look, which seemed enough for her brother to continue. "You know how you can transform, right?"
Leere frowned, she could almost see the gears in Tebanam's head whirring. "Yeah? What about it?"
"Would you be able to say . . . transform into a man?"
"Well yeah, it's a pretty easy spell actually. Even Mama can do it."
"Although the idea of our dear Mama as a man sounds really funny, that is a subject for a different conversation." Pausing to hear Leere let out a chuckle in bemusement, the brother than continued. "Do you still remember it? As in, can you still do it?"
"Yeah . . . I guess." Leere's eyes then squinted in suspicion. "Where are you going with this?"
"Well . . ."
Having found Tebanam's hotel, they had retreated to his room.
It was rather small, what with the large king-sized bed taking up a large amount of space. But Leere didn't have time to judge Tebanam's choice in accommodation when her brother was hurrying her along.
"Alright," Tebanam said, locking the door so no one could enter. "Now let's see what you can do."
Although still unaware of Tebanam's plan, Leere obeyed her little brother's wishes. With a string of non-Hyrulian words, it only took a few seconds before she disappeared behind smoke - an aftereffect of shape-shifting magic. Once the smoke cleared, Leere spoke.
"Did it - Woah!" Leere began before clutching at her throat. Her light and effeminate voice was now low and gravely. "My voice!"
"No way!" Tebanam said, his face covered with shock and awe. "It worked! I mean, you look exactly the same but . . . But a man!"
Going to the hotel room mirror, Leere was greeted by an adult man in her reflection. Her face was just as pale, eyes just as red and hair just as long. She even still had the beauty spot below the left side of his lip. But there was no mistaking it, she had become a man.
A tuft of brown facial hair covered her chin, a strong jawline and obvious Adam's apple made her look like a normal Hylian man.
"I'm honestly surprised," Leere said as she turned around in front of the mirror. "I haven’t used this spell in years. Not since I was a kid."
Then again, that was when she was young. Where there wasn't really a lot of difference between a prepubescent boy and girl. But looking at herself now, she would honestly not recognise herself.
She could already tell she was a bit taller but only a little, as she compared herself to her mixed-raced younger brother. Leere also felt stronger too, her arm muscles easily bulging out of the shirt she wore.
Now that she mentioned it, her clothes did seem rather tight. Especially around her crotch.
"What the heck?!" Leere shouted at the sight she saw under her pants and underwear.
Tebanam did not seem to feel any shame in joining in and sneaking a peek. And before Leere had the right mind to slap him silly, he was cackling.
"Bahahah!" Tebanam roared, holding his stomach. "I-It's like an acorn! Ahahaha!"
Leere glared at her brother, "Shut it! I'm not a giant Gerudian like you, OK?!"
But nothing seemed to reach Tebanam. He was in a fit of uncontrollable laughter, hunching over as he almost seemed to be in physical pain. Even with Leere - softly - punching him, it took Tebanam a good few minutes to recover.
Wiping his tearing eyes, the young prince sighed. Standing tall, he gave Leere another look over.
"Man, you really are a man, huh? I wouldn't even know it was you if I saw you."
Leere couldn't help but feel proud. Raising an arm and flexing her new muscles. "Are you doubting my magic, little brother?"
Tebanam chuckled, "As if, I know my place."
Leere huffed, "So you should."
"But I've gotta say," Tebanam said, walking a circle around Leere with a hand at his own chin. "You look like the sort of guy I would go after."
"Ew, gross." Leere frowned in disgust.
A look of excitement grew on Tebanam's face. "You know what?" He said excitedly, his eyes wide with excitement. "Let's go out!"
"What?" Leere blanched, "Why?"
"Why not!" His voice filled with enthusiasm. "Let's see how long your spell lasts!"
"How?"
"Let's go to a gay bar!"
"Wha-" Leere began but then shook her head. "No way! They'd definitely know."
"Trust me," Tebanam said, patting his, now, brother on the shoulder. "They won't notice a thing!"
"Wait a second," Leere said, stopping Tebanam in his tracks. Pointing a finger defiantly at her brother, "This was what you were planning from the start!"
"Nu-uh!" Tebanam objected, "I want to . . . test your magic and . . ." He was clearly fumbling for an excuse worthy of his plan but with no success.
Leere crossed her arms over her chest. "Come on, what's going on?"
Tebanam sighed, lifting an arm to ruffle his short, bright orange hair. "Well, I may have, kinda, sort of, got on the bad side of a bartender at the gay bar and got into a fight."
Leere let out a long sigh, shaking her head. "Should I ask?"
"Let's just say that you should never hit on a bartender's sidepiece."
Leere shook her head in disappointment. But this did sound a lot like what her brother would do.
"I'm not going, Teb." Leere said, not helping but sounding sympathetic despite Tebanam's stupidity. "I'm not going to be your bodyguard just so you don't get your ass beaten."
"C'mooooon," Her brother drawled, "Pleeaasee? Have you never wanted to experience what it's like to be a man? Better yet - a gay man? Besides, I'm sure it would be fun!"
Leere pursed her lips and tried to stand for her own convictions. But - for some unknown reason - seeing her fully-grown baby brother plead and implore her made her question her own decision.
Letting out a long exaggerated sigh, Leere rolled her eyes. "Fine! But I'm not the one who's going to save you if you get into any trouble."
On the other side of town, surrounded by brothels, bars and shifty-looking hotels, Oshmel's gay bar was alive with raucous laughter, chatter and music. Men of all ages and races gathered in and around the building. All seeming to be having a great night.
Leere shuffled where she stood at the entrance of the gay bar. She wore a spare pair of Tebanam's old clothes. A bit too big, Leere had made do and created an outfit that suited her new physique.
Leere felt nervous. And she didn't usually get nervous. In circumstances like these, Leere would be excited to go in and have a good time. But with her being under an enchantment, she had a fear that her magic could soon vanish and she knew the many patrons of this male exclusive bar wouldn't be welcome to a woman among them.
Besides, she didn't really know how men, more specifically gay me, flirted. She could use her feminine wiles to make men, and even more women, fall to their knees but she had doubts on her skills as a man.
Luckily, Tebanam - while holding back his clear excitement - comforted her. "You'll be fine, Leer. I promise, if anything happens, we're out."
Leere did not seem convinced, giving her brother a doubtful look.
"Alright, alright." Tebanam said, "I'll pay for your drinks too."
Leere was not one to ignore a free drink, so she grabbed onto Tebanam's wrist and lead the way inside the busy bar.
The gay bar was a nice establishment. With many tables filled with patrons, outside veranda and large dance floor, it was definitely a place Leere would happily go to. The building was dark apart from the candles or torches scattered about, making the mood of the building one of flirtation and mischief. A live band played cheerful yet slow music, a beat perfect to dance to as some patrons were demonstrating.
Going to the bar, Tebanam ordered two of the house's beer. The man behind the bar was quick and settled the two flasks on the bartop for the two siblings to take.
Leere took a hearty sip, welcoming the bitter taste like an old friend, watching over the joyful crowd.
"Hey, is Rukah here?" Tebanam asked the bartender, leaning over to see past the staff behind the bar.
The man shook his head. "No, it's his day off tonight."
Tebanam's said a quick thanks before looking to Leere with relief.
"Let me guess," Leere smiled with bemusement and took another healthy swallow of her drink. "He's the bully you're trying to avoid."
Tebanam nodded, "Trust me, I am not at all sad he isn't here."
Leere's brother then turned back to the bartender a telltale smirk on his lips. He's on the prowl , Leere thought. Not much caring, however.
Both of them finished their first drinks and quickly got a second. Whether that was on Tebanam's tab or the flattered bartender's, Leere didn't know but she was thankful nonetheless.
Just enjoying the amazing vocal acrobatics Tebanam did in flirting with the staff, Leere almost didn't notice a man take the spot on the other side of her at the bar.
"Hey, handsome," The good-looking Hyrulian said with a kind smile. Leaning onto the bartop and looking Leere over.
Tall and decently muscular, Leere would consider him as being a rather attractive man. He had short, blonde hair and soft blue eyes that crinkled when he smiled. Maybe it was just Leere's paranoia but the man looked shifty. Her suspicions didn't seem enough to think twice on it, however.
"Oh," Leere said outwardly, surprised someone would come up to her so soon after arriving. "Hey yourself." Giving her normal flirtatious smile.
It seemed to work a treat, the man only smiled wider. "I've never seen you around here before. Traveller?"
"Yeah," Leere answered with a nod, finishing the last drops of her beer. "Passing through to Kahmel."
"Kahmel?" The man repeated in surprise. His eyes not restraining from looking Leere over again. "By yourself? You must be stronger than you look."
Leere smiled, knowing well that the assumption was based on her still obvious height difference with the stranger. Only miniscule compared to that of her Gerudo siblings, clearly, it was something the man had to note.
"Trust me, I can handle myself." Leere countered, giving a wink for good measure.
The man let out a chuckle, "Oh? Can you handle another drink, then?"
"Easily."
The man got a bartender's attention, ordered and within a few minutes another pint of beer was in Leere's hand.
With already half of her third beer past her lips, she felt a hand go around her waist. The man only smiled, shuffling closer to where she stood at the bar.
"So tell me," The Hyrulian began, his voice low yet very audible over the throng of the bar. "What's your name?"
"Leere." She said, curious to see the man's reaction to her effeminate name.
He didn't seem to falter, only smiling further. "Well, Leere, I'm Rukah."
The name sounded familiar but Leere just took it to just be that it was a common Hyrulian name. Raising her glass she nodded to the man, "Nice to meet you, Rukah."
Finishing her drink in one final gulp, the hand at her waist tugged her ever closer to Rukah's side. "What are you doing after this?" His blue eyes seemed to glow in the dark lighting of the bar, making goosebumps rise on Leere's forearms.
"Well I'll probably go home with my-" She turned to point to her brother but found he was very clearly occupied. Leaning over the bartop, he had snagged a quick kiss from the bartender who seemed more than happy for another. " . . . Friend." She finished lamely, impressed yet annoyed by how distracted her brother had gotten in the mere minutes after arriving.
Rukah chuckled, clearly seeing why Leere paused, "Well it looks like your friend is preoccupied at the moment."
Just as Rukah spoke, the music in the tavern changed. Although the same upbeat tempo as the last hymn, this one was lead by a flute. Clearly a favourite of the patrons, the dancefloor was soon stuffed with new dancers.
Rukah seemed to have the same idea, turning to Leere after looking at the crowd. "Would you like to dance?"
Leere didn't need to look over to her brother to know he was still engrossed in seducing the staff so she shrugged. "Sure."
Joining the ever growing group of occupants on the dancefloor, Leere easily found her rhythm. Dancing and swaying to the beat of the song, she was a bit too inebriated to care if she was giving herself away by the rather erotic way she danced. Rukah seemed impressed and no one seemed to be planning to make a big deal out of it.
Leere had found her stride in regards to flirting as a man, easily knowing when to give Rukah or one of the customers a suggestive glance, when to graze her hand or rear against someone else's. Overall, she was having a good amount of fun.
Sadly, the song had to change and although many people still stayed to dance to the new tune, most opted to retreat back to their tables or the bar. Rukah was one of them, offering Leere another drink before leading the way out of the thinning crowd.
Leere could not see Tebanam at the bar, perhaps already having escorted that bartender back to his hotel room. Leere did feel hurt but seeing the newest pint in Rukah's hand, she easily pushed such thoughts aside.
Leere lifted the drink to her lips and gulped nearly half of the amber liquid down before realising something was off. There was this tang at the back of her throat, something that really should not be in a normal beer.
Looking to Rukah, the Hyrulian man seemed to be looking over cautiously, as if expecting something to happen.
Shit , Leere thought. Quickly trying to take a step towards the bathroom and away from the stranger. Intending to throw up the contents of that beer, Rukah grabbed onto her wrist as soon as she turned away from him.
"Hey now," He said, putting on a look of concern. "What's wrong? Where are you going?"
"B-Bathroom," Leere uttered.
The lights seemed to be going brighter as if someone put fuel to the flames. Her legs soon felt weak, her knees eventually feeling unbalance just by standing still. Something was wrong. Something was in that drink.
"C'mon," Rukah tried to soothe her, reaching out his other hand to take Leere's freed wrist. "Don't you wanna dance a bit more?"
"N-No," Leere weakily shook her head, trying but failing to pull out of the man's grip. "There was . . . There was something in my drink."
The world was beginning to spin, disorientating Leere with even the slightest turn of her head. Whatever was in her drink, it was spreading. Pumped into the bloodstream it made quick work with the alcohol. This wasn't an accident, this was done on purpose and Leere knew just who the culprit was.
Taking a step back again, Leere tried to escape from Rukah's clutches but instead lost her footing. Perhaps due to the sticky floor near the bar or just her now feeble legs, the ground came out from under her.
But two strong hands caught her before she landed on the ground. With what strength Leere had, she looked up.
Tebanam was back and he looked worried. Placing a hand on Leere's forehead, he checked her temperature. "Hey, you ok?"
"N-No," Leere said shakily. "Something was in my-"
"He's fine." Rukah interrupted, taking back Leere's wrist and giving it a soft tug. "We were just thinking about going back to my place."
Tebanam frowned, looking from his weakened sister to the stranger. "I don't think so." Easily grabbing onto the Hyrulian's wrist, he squeezed the shorter man hard enough to recoil from his grapple on Leere, who welcomed the protective arm of her brother around her.
"W-We were having fun!" Rukah stuttered, trying to defend himself out desperation. "He'll be fine, I'll look after him. Why don't you go back to chatting with Tirill?" Nodding to the bar, clearly speaking about the man Tebanam had been flirting with. "You two were getting pretty familiar, it'd be a shame if-"
Rukah paused his rambling to scowl. Looking up, he squinted at Tebanam's face as if recognising him. "Wait just a moment . . . Do I know you?"
Even Leere could feel Tebanam stiffen. His arms squeezing ever so tighter around her shoulders as if to keep her from slipping away.
"No you don’t," Tebanam obviously lied. "I'm just a-"
"Yeah . . ." Rukah interrupted, raising a hand to point at the tall man. "Yeah, I know you alright! You're that prick who went after Rilon!"
"Y-You're wrong, I don't know a Rilon." Tebanam continued, taking a cautious step back.
"Don't you bullshit me!" Rukah angrily shouted, catching bystander's attention. "You were here before! Going after him when you knew he was mine!"
"Well, m-maybe I did," Tebanam admitted, "But I didn't know he was yours."
Leere, perhaps too out of it to truly understand the context of this fight, could not help but spare a thought of bemusement. Seeing her tall half-Gerudo brother almost cowering from the puny Hyrulian that stood in front of him.
"Shut it!" Rukah said, clearly intoxicated and visibly angry. Reaching out he grabbed onto Leere's wrist. So tight that is it made her grunt in discomfort. "Imma take your boyfriend and we'll pretend like this never happened."
"Boyfriend?!" Tebanam said, tone heavy with shock and disgust. "He's my sis-brother!" Leere could feel her younger sibling take a step backwards, trying to make space between them and the Hyrulian. "Now let go of him!"
"No way," Rukah said, shaking his head as he closed the space between them again. "I work here, remember? So you better play nice."
With one strong yank, Leere had slipped from Tebanam's safe embrace into the stranger’s arms. Holding both of her arms behind her back and with Leere's symptoms only worsening, there was no way she would have the strength to free herself.
"I'll repeat myself only one more time." Rukah said, a half-crazed smirk curling his face. "You get out of my club and leave your . . . brother with me."
With all the strength she had left, Leere crouched in her assailant's grip. And before either her brother or her attacker could say a thing, she jumped upwards and slamming the back of her head into Rukah's chin and nose.
Leere felt the arms that had been restraining her loosen and took the needed steps to get back to Tebanam's side. Rukah was on the floor, falling onto his ass from the force of the hit. He let out a pathetic groan, clutching at his face as he wriggled to get back up to his feet.
To Leere's dismay, three men separated from the onlooking crowd to join Rukah by his side. Clearly not there to negotiate.
Leere swore under her breath. Knowing her condition, she would only be able to fight off one of the newcomers. But Leere then felt the hand that held her close squeeze her. Tebanam was still with her and clearly, he'd be able to handle the rest of the rabble.
The newcomers were the first to move in. All at once, all three lept to separate the siblings. Leere kicked one in the shin, causing the man to topple. Tebanam used his large forearms to careen across and smack the other two away.
In the ensuing chaos, Leere quickly had her opponent groaning from a broken bone and Tebanam had left the other two men unconscious.
Thankfully, that seemed to be the only people who were planning to side with the now bleeding Rukah. So before any more people got any ideas, the siblings quickly pushed through the onlooking crowd and left the bar in a run.
The night sky outside of Oshmel was beautiful. Without the lights of the city brightening the heavens, the navy blue was dotted by bright stars. It was also silent apart from the soft running of the nearby river flowing through the grasslands and the soft chirping of local insects.
Too bad that was ruined by Leere heaving up the inside of her stomach into the river. Trying as best she could to get rid of any last remnants of whatever Rukah had slipped into her drink. The only comfort being the soft, comforting pat of her little brother against her hunched back.
With her stomach feeling empty and throat sore from choking, Leere laid down in the grass to rest and to stop her head from spinning.
"You feeling better?" Tebanam inquired, sitting next to her and looking over the meadow-covered scape.
"Not a lot," Leere muttered and lifted her had to squeeze it into a fist. "But my energy is coming back."
"Good," Tebanam sighed in relief. "I'm sorry, by the way. I really should've kept an eye on you."
"Yeah, you should've." Leere said dryly but then nudging Tebanam from where she lay to tell him she was joking. "But it's not your fault. It's that son of a bitch Rukah who should by saying sorry."
Tebanam let out an understanding grunt but didn't seem to quite like he had understood that he had been forgiven. Guilt still twinkled in his orange eyes as a frown played at his brow.
"Listen . . . I'm sorry for what I had said. The last time we saw each other, I mean." Tebanam muttered, pulling a blade of grass from the stem to fiddle with it in his fingers. "It was uncalled for."
Leere shrugged, sitting up to watch her little brother twist and tug at the leaf. "It's fine. Me and Rinku weren't really helping things. I don't really know where it all came from but . . . we really shouldn't have ended it like that."
Tebanam nodded, the blade of grass now tatters in his lap. "Yeah . . . me neither."
Nudging her baby brother again, Leere smiled to him. "As if I could ever hold a grudge against you, Teb."
Tebanam could only smile, reassurance being all he needed to let him relax where he sat. "We better get going then." The brother said before getting to his feet. "You can stay in my room tonight."
Leere stood up on her feet but soon felt her knees shake under the pressure of holding herself upwards. Tebanam seemed to see her dilemma and smiled.
"C'mon," He said, crouching and offering his back for her to climb onto. "I'll carry you."
Leere restrained a smile and obeyed, quickly getting into Tebanam's back. She was having a strong sense of nostalgia. They had used to do this when they were kids, only it had been the other way around. Tebanam sobbing from a grazed knee and Leere telling him off for not being careful.
"Goddesses, you're heavy." Tebanam groaned as he steadied himself.
Leere playfully hit her brother, "That's no way to talk to a girl." "But your not a girl," Tebanam retorted, smirking at Leere's still transformed appearance.
"Oh yeah!" The sister gasped, quickly muttering the needed incantation under her breath. She soon felt lighter, her clothes loosening and her chest quickly weighing her down. "Better?"
"Much so," Tebanam answered mid-chuckle.
For that one night, the town of Oshwel was treated to the sound of adult siblings laughter as the two of them, with only one trail of footsteps, ran down the empty streets.
This fic is based on the Zelgan au (and Rinku) by @figmentforms Tebanam is created by @s-kinnaly Leere is created by @mrneighbourlove Towns and other minor characters are by me I highly recommend you look at their content on this to have a better understanding of the story
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ghosty-schnibibit · 5 years ago
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SO HOW ABOUT THAT AMNESTY EP GUYS
spent the afternoon watching coraline and catching up on laundry, i think i'm ready for some creepy quell shit. also it's currently raining its ass off r/n and my power may go out at any second. let's go!
i fuckin forgot woodbridge existed lmao
can't wait to see wtf is up with the interpreter
damn this is cool
oh wait what the fuck
oh shit this is the shapeshifter planet!!!
god i love minerva so much
well this is spooky as shit
are they in sylvain already?
"guys! gals! peoples!" thank u for being inclusive thacker
hmm, interesting!
eww, ew ew ew, griffin why
CENTIPEDE
bless you clint lmao
"that's a tricky question" griffin i am afraid
"weird cloud full of centipedes" GRIFFIN I AM AFRAID
... so it was invisible, and somehow thacker could see it?
i legit cannot remember what the plan was once they got to sylvain beside fuck up the quell
NICE! go duck! :D
"did your hero duck newton level up?" he deserves to for the brilliant radio fumble last ep
oh no, this battle is going to be so bad for thacker D:
EWWWWW
oh god i forgot he stabbed a dude's hand holy shit
cool! good call
oh fuck that's not great
lovely folley there trav
oh thank god she has so many bonuses
that's a beautiful mental image lol
they’ve turned it into shiny jello
l i l  q u e l l
oh god it's like the fuckin steak from poltergeist
barclay i love you holy shit
a what justin???? oh its a ff thing, okay
thacker and mama are such cute friends, i love them
"she's highly flammable" bless
stern you fuckin dork
duck w h y
aww pigeon ; _ ;
goddammit griffin you are making me cry
WELCOME TO CHICAGO DIPSHITS
well this is ominous as hell
yes she does! :D
aubrey you are precious and i love you
IT'S THE LITTLE INTERPRETER
... wait did she say she'd a fraud???
OH NO, OH NO, THEY'RE ALL DEAD, OH NO
GRIFFIN I AM AFRAID
justin continuing to play super dexterous characters lol
NICE! go thacker
kick! that! hand!
was it trying to turn her???
oh no please tell me vincent is still alive
yeah maybe do that duck
... oh no, that's vincent isn't it
gotta love them good finale rolls
e a t  m y  w h o l e  a s s
oh no, spooky bad music, oh no oh no oh no
CALLED IT! NOT FUCKING HAPPY I CALLED IT BUT I CALLED IT!
thacker what are you doing
FUCK YEAH CLINT
oh damn, digging this music
OH HOLY SHIT IT'S THE QUELL
i love this voice effect so much but i'm terrified
HE SAVED HIM! THACKER SAVED HIM :D
oh poor vincent :'(
duck do not pawn off your slim jims on this poor goat man
"that is bracing" bless you vincent holy shit
oooooh no, this is going to end badly
OH WHAT THE FUCK
only two more episodes!!! fuck!!!!!
take your time griffin, you have proven time and again that delays from you only mean better quality in the long run
OH FUCK THAT MUSIC
OH NO MUFFY
oh my fucking god that was so surreal, jesus fuck
oh no this could be really bad
i forgot woodbridge was a ghost, the voice griffin gives him makes me think of the tootsie pop owl
aubrey i fucking love you so much
NICE! go janelle
THE WEE BABEY
he got his chosen power back also, which is good
does vincent have a crush on duck
m e a t  m e t h
aubrey you cannot be this nonchalant about these things
... she didn't know. that wasn't a cry for help, she didn't know aubrey could hear her, what did she mean about being a fraud?
that's a fun new word clint
oop, hello there music
... IT'S BECAUSE AUBREY IS THERE
i am both concerned and terrified
there are nine minutes left in the episode griffin what is going on here
god i cannot fucking wait to see art of this
YEAAAH GO DANI
YEAAAAAH GO INDRID
I'M GONNA FUCKING CRYYY
OH NO, OH NO, DO NOT KILL MY GIRL GRIFFIN
WAIT WHAT??? IS THIS NOT JAKE?????
DHFADGLSSJDGLSJLHDFLJKDDKJADGKJ WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK
NO GRIFFN, GO BACK TO WHAT EVER THE FUCK THAT WAS, WHAT THE FLYING FUCK
aubrey my baby ilu
AUBREY IS SYLVAIN CONFIRMED
FUCK! DR. HARRIS BONKERS IS A SYLPH NOW, THAT’S WHY HE TRANSFORMED, FUCK!!!
oh my god this music is so perfect
SO YEAH, ALL OF THAT JUST HAPPENED. SEE YA’LL IN SEPTEMBER, HOLY SHIT.
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the-elegant-espeon · 5 years ago
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Ducktales 2017 presents: Moonvasion! A Liveblog
*SpongeBob voice* a week and a half later:
Finally watching the finale! I know it's been out for a while, I've just been so busy with hw and stuff. I've managed to stay mostly unspoiled, with the exception of the very end. Here we go!
Woo-oo!
Awwqww he missed her so muuuuuch
Love how she glances at the lower 3rd
ilu mama
ilu Fenton
He's so polite
He's offering him a pie! What a sweetie
Ok Mamá totally knows GD is Fenton
I hope Carl is technically Carl barks
Love how "ah phooey" runs in the family
Oh look it's my favorite seagull
Love Beakley's wild driving
Dewstiny really.
I'm adding nerp to my vocabulary
Lil Bulb! My boy!
DARKWING SAVING LAUNCHPAD AHHH
Lena's an ally I'm not crying you are
Also she's hanging out at the playground!!
So are Violet and Quackfaster!
Lil Bulb sacrificed himself 😭😭 I'll remember you always
YEAH D'JINN YOU GO
I THOUGHT GYRO SAID CLOWN ARMY AT FIRST IM
Yeah she definitely knows
Fenton "who's Fenton" Crackshell-Cabrera
And so the rivalry begins
Love that the Ottoman Empire guys and Gabby McStabberson count as allies
Huey's really taking after Gyro huh
DELLENE REUNION IM NOT READYYYY
Wow Sellene and Storkulese really both super gay for Della and Donald huh
I kinda knew this was gonna happen, of course Della wants to keep the kids safe
Della and Selene deserve a better reunion smh
It's just. so unsettling seeing Manny on all fours
Beakley's scream oh my god
My single goal in life is to become Emily "don't disrespect the archives!" Quackfaster
Bringing the harpies back! I like it
Gizmo-poquito I'm gonna go cry now brb
Ooh that's a nice attention to detail. No sign of life, just like 10 years ago. on the moon.
DELLA DONALD REUNION
THE MICKEY WATERMELON!!
Man Frank really loves Manny. I mean he deserves to be one of the few left
Dewey's face
HUEY'S FACE
Glomgold trying to do the nails on a chalkboard
Also he has those alphabet fridge magnets
It's fine I'm fine everything's fine
I want a Sharka
akdksoaojd I'm going to miss being a planet
This episode has some killer one liners
IM CRYIJNG THE BONDING AAHHH
FETHRY!! and Gladstone too I guess
OH NO THE PARALLELS I CANT DO THIS
THEY EACH TAKE AFTER A DUCK COUSIN STOP IT
Brilliant plan Glomgold. Just brilliant.
What's Scrooge going to have to be? An Irishman? Who do the Scots hate?
OF COURSE ITS SANTA IM LOSINF MY MIND
God I love that Scrooge and Glomgold are working together DT 17 said scromgold rights
AWWW
Love Manny catching Scrooge
Launchpad is still in there!
Ok good he's safe
Yay Mitsi!
Ok so Lunaris is totally off the shits
Oh Scrooge is so happy to have both of them back 😭😭😭
Oh my God. Frank's gonna kill all of the main characters. Next season is just Darkwing Duck.
OH YEAH BABEY!
PENNY CALLED HER ROOMIE I LOVE THEMMM
Selene!
Thank u Storkulese
Penny is exactly Launchpad's type but Launchpad isn't Penny's type. I'm not worried. Especially considering this show is about familial relationships
Ok first recreating the hug from the pilot and then that scene with the army? Infinity War who?
Shoutout to Goldie! Of course she'd come
Glomgold trying to sneak in
SCROOGE HUGGING WEBBY
F.O.W.L.!
I need a whole separate post for this tbh
But I love that the Investors are the head
If anyone is going to deflect from F.O.W.L. it's going to be Gandra
Of course the Funzo's mascot works for them
Aahhhhh this was so good honestly this episode was fantastic. I can't believe it. Season 2 is complete! Thanks for a fantastic season I had such a wonderful time watching it. Immense props to the cast, and of course the crew as well, you can really see all of the hard work that's been put into the episode and the whole show. I can't wait to see what's next. And with that, I'll see ya for the live blog of the season 3 premier!
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ohsweetflips · 6 years ago
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okay so AMNESTY
mad spoilers under the cut bc i’ve had a couple hours to think and let what happened in that ep completely consume me and i have So Much To Say
psa: this post is a fucking mess bc im so tired
shout out to sheriff ownes for just Accepting this shit like he really just looked at scary not-barclay bigfoot and spectre deputy dewey and went, “adult life is already so goddamn weird, this may as well happen”
aubrey and hollis bitching at each other,,,, i kinda super love it
aubrey’s “fuck off” was good, and surprising imo, too
“you better respectre that... it’s a little spectre joke” “yeah, very little”
also i just really loved duck in general in that opening scene like
honestly just the way that duck and ned are as characters is so interesting to me like!!! you have duck who is, by all accounts minus the talking sword, super normal, but he’s still so brave and so ready to rush into things. and ned, who seems himself as the “lesser” and the “coward” of the group, has really been put through the ringer recently and is still fucking trucking along!!!
and then there’s aubrey, who is so fiery and passionate and shows that in every single thing that she does. she’s impulsive and so action-before-thought but she’s also so ready to learn about what the Fuck is going on and just
okay forgive me i’m so fucking tired and have been so consumed by the last fucking two minutes of the episode that my thoughts are so jumbled
but, w/ aubrey, i love how she was actually getting frustrated with janelle
and duck and leo have me fucking Nervous
ALSO THO CALLED IT THAT THIS ABOMINATION IS PROBABLY LOOKING TO START A WAR BETWEEN EARTH AND SYLVANE
also, back to aubrey, my theory is that, after touching the crystal, sylvane is literally A Part of her, thus why she was able to save dewey. but, speaking of dewey, if only sylvans become ghosts in the light of sylvane........ is dewey a sylvan??????
BUT HEY LETS TALK ABOUT NED AND BOYD FOR A HOT SECOND
well, ned first: 1) where’s that laptop, 2) when dani showed up in mama’s office, i high key freaked out
i didn’t expect him to take the statue so quickly but Holy Shit
and the hotel scene with boyd and ned? 
or, shall i say, “boyd” and ned
like, when ned was offering boyd the cryptonomica van, i thought it was gonna be that ned would file a “stolen van” report with the police and get boyd arrested again
and then he was basically like, “boyd, i will give you everything i have if you give me the pendant” and i was like Holy Fuck
im so tired i promise i’m more eloquent than this i’m just fucking exhausted 
and then boyd being sick really got to me? like, at first, i Really didn’t want ned to give him the statue, but then when i realized that it was 99% gonna go to boyd’s treatment for whatever he has.......
but when griffin got to the epilogue, i knew Something had to be up. i really thought it was going to be that boyd lied and still had all of ned’s stuff. or that boyd someone was in contact with mama.
and then
and fucking then
“boyd” steps through the rift while boyd’s actual body (aka a fucking corpse) is left in the closet
like holy fuck????? i think boyd was who was in that light caccoon in the hotel
and that “sacrifice/transaction” janelle mentioned?? i think it was either boyd, or will be dani
but boyd’s death keeps fucking me up so badly bc 1) we know For Sure that this abomination can speak and reason and tap into memories and literally know Everything about the person it mimics, 2) ned still very much thinks that boyd is alive, and 3) i try not to look at amnesty through a balance lense but us finding boyd’s corpse in the closet is the closest i have felt to balance-levels of fucking me up
oh my god this post is so messy but i’m so tired and i need to relisten to the episode one more time to get all my thoughts in order
a couple weeks back, i saw someone mentioning how this arc felt like “finale territory” for amnesty and, back then, i didn’t get it, but now i Completely See It like,,,, this feels Super Close to finale territory
also, final point, if one of the final scenes of this arc isn’t the pine guard being faced with two clones of each other, both going, “i’m the real one!!! kill the other one!!!!!” i will be fucking shocked
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doggonneit · 7 years ago
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Honey Eyes and Bloody Lips
Fandom: Haikyuu!!
Pairing/Characters: Kuroo/Tsukishima
Rating: T for Teen
Warnings: Swearing, piercings, tattoos, blood
A.N. This is for @its-love-u-asshole for the @hqvalentineexchange. I hope you enjoy!
[Read on AO3]
Kuroo should’ve guessed from the name Karasuno that there would be a crow theme to the studio. The front was nothing spectacular to look at, all the dirty grey of concrete with a few crow silhouettes spray-painted onto its surface. Whoever had been tasked with that job had taken liberties with the amount of paint they used, as each bird had black trails trickling down like blood.
It was morbid.
Kuroo thought it was adorable.
Akaashi had recommended the studio since one of his friends worked there, and he gave a ringing endorsement to their piercing services which was impressive because praise that like didn’t come lightly from someone like him. A quick Google search further cemented Karasuno’s reputation-- they’d only been open for six months but already garnered over one hundred reviews raving about their excellent standards of service and friendly staff.
That was all Kuroo needed before he grabbed his keys and drove down to the studio.
Given its macabre exterior, it wasn’t surprising to see the same theme running in its interior-- more of the same dripping birds gliding along the walls and resting on silhouettes of tree branches that curled around the polaroids of ironically happy customers with their new piercings.
A blond man sat behind the front counter, so concentrated on adjusting jewellery in a velvet case while humming to the music coming from the portable speaker next to him that he didn’t notice Kuroo’s presence till he leaned over and put his elbows on the surface.
“Oh.” The man’s golden gaze flitted upwards and his mouth formed a perfect o. “Sorry, I didn’t see you there.”
Kuroo gaped and his elbows slipped out from under him. He smacked his forehead on the counter with the loudest crack and in that moment he wished through the haze of pain for instant death to save him from the humiliation of looking like a complete moron in front of the most gorgeous man to walk the earth.
“Shit.” The man leaned closer to him and that was not good for his heart . “Are you all right?”
“Fine!” Kuroo sprang back a safe distance and pretended he couldn't the heat blazing across his cheeks like a wildfire. He usually wasn’t this inept, and he cursed the little black crows on the walls for his dismal state. “Sorry, clumsy. Super clumsy.”
“Yeah, that looks like it’ll bruise.”
“The only thing bruised is my pride,” Kuroo weakly joked. “Nothing important.”
The man gave a small huff of laughter and Kuroo’s pride swelled back to its usual inflated proportions. How many people could boast they had literally heard happiness from an angel? It was the most beautiful sound, the kind that was meant to be curled up on the couch next to him laughing late into the night about their hopes and dreams.
“Well then, welcome to Karasuno. My name’s Tsukishima and I’m here for all your piercing needs. What can I do for you today?”
It took Kuroo a moment to remember why he even came here in the first place.
“I’m thinking of getting pierced,” Kuroo said, then gave himself the biggest mental slap. He was in a piercing studio, for fuck’s sake. It wasn’t like he walked in here looking for rainbows and unicorns. “So, uh, you take walk-ins?”
“Yeah, absolutely. What did you want done?”
Kuroo paused. He’d wanted to get a third set done in his ears for a while now, but all the client photos showcasing a variety of piercings in a variety of places wavered his intentions and a good, long look at Tsukishima changed them completely.
Tsukishima was naturally stunning, and the jewellery that adorned him made him a complete work of art. The most striking piece was a barbell that went straight through the middle of his bottom lip and moved with every word like a hypnotic dance. Kuroo had never seen jewellery so perfect for someone and he wanted something like that for himself.
Tsukishima’s golden eyes followed Kuroo’s gaze and ran his tongue over the piercing, far too slow to be anything but deliberate. “You like the labret?”
Say something cool, say something cool, say something cool.
“It’s cool,” Kuroo said, and wished he could melt through the floor. That had to be the lamest response ever. Why was he being such a thirteen year old boy trying to impress his crush? He ignored the fact that it wasn’t too far from his current reality. “I don’t have the guts to take a needle through the lip though. I’m squeamish.”
That’ll make the devastatingly handsome man swoon. Good job, dumbass.
Tsukishima raised one pierced eyebrow. “Squeamish,” he repeated, looking pointedly at Kuroo’s arms. “That makes so much sense.”
“Oh, these.” Kuroo touched his tattooed sleeves with an abashed chuckle. He liked his ink and it was nothing to call it an addiction, not since he got his first taste on his nineteenth birthday when Akaashi tattooed a little black cat sitting on the side of his neck and showed him the wonders of body art.
The needle hooked him and never let go. Kuroo turned to Akaashi for his every tattooing need: a love poem in cursive Spanish across his ribs, the vivid blues of a stormy ocean crashing down his right arm and the livid greens of a snarling dragon spiralling its way down his left arm.
“You must have a stomach for needles if you can sit through hours of being repeatedly stabbed and injected with ink,” Tsukishima said.
“The needle’s not as big,” Kuroo protested, and if he didn't feel like a child before then he certainly did now. But hey, this was pure survival instincts speaking-- it was perfectly natural to be wary of sharp objects that could punch a hole through your body. “It makes sense from an evolutionary perspective.”
“Fair enough,” Tsukishima agreed. “So, no labret for you today?”
Kuroo was about to say no, but he just couldn’t peel his eyes away from Tsukishima’s mouth and how amazing they looked with the silver ball ends seated perfectly above and below his bottom lip. He wanted to know what that felt like on his lips, whether it be through a kiss or a needle.
You romantic, you.
“I want it,” Kuroo quickly said.
Tsukishima frowned, noticing Kuroo’s snap decision and clearly wanting him to take a step back and think it through. “If you’re unsure, it may be best to postpone--”
“No, I want it,” Kuroo said again, this time slower and with greater conviction. “I want the labret.”
Tsukishima fell silent and he held out for what felt like an eternity, no doubt testing Kuroo’s resolution. But Kuroo didn’t budge-- he was going to stick with the big, scary needle going through his whole lip because his mama may have raised a fool but she didn’t raise no quitter.
“If you’re sure--”
“Oh, I am.”
“--we have a selection of colours available you can see over there. Take your time picking one and I’ll go get my equipment ready.”
They parted from the counter, Kuroo ducking his head as soon as it was polite and burying his face in his hands. If he rubbed hard enough, maybe he’d scourge the redness from his cheeks by completely sanding off his skin. It’d been years since his awkward teenage years and here he was reliving every single one of those horror stories again.
At least he didn’t have acne anymore.
Kuroo took a deep breath and faced the display cabinet-- nope, he wasn’t going to let himself spiral down that particular path right now, not when there was a chance he could make an even bigger fool of himself. He focused on the jewellery gleaming under the little lights and where was he even supposed to start? Colour? Stone? Ends? Kuroo just blinked and stared-- he’d made too big a decision in getting a labret and now his decision-making skills had deserted him in his hour of need.
“What are you thinking?”
Kuroo yelped and jumped straight into the cabinet. The jewellery inside rattled loose like beads all over their shelves and Tsukishima grabbed onto his arms to steady him.
“Whoa, sorry.” Tsukishima smoothed down his shirt and gave it a pat. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
Oh my god, he touched my chest, not a drill, not a drill!
“No, I was just supised-- surpised-- surp--surp--”
“Surprised?” Tsukishima offered.
“Surprised.” Kuroo’s voice came out embarrassingly high-pitched and now he was even squeaking like he was thirteen again. He cleared his throat and said in a much deeper and sexier voice, “Surprised. Yes. Sorry about the, uh, mess in the cabinet.”
“No need,” Tsukishima said with a shrug. “I’ve been meaning to rearrange it anyway.”
“Oh,” Kuroo said. “Good.”
Silence.
“So,” Tsukishima prompted. “Jewellery?”
“Right!” Kuroo gave a nervous laugh. “Uh, I’m not too sure what’ll look best on me, so I don’t know?”
Fantastic, men love indecision.
Tsukishima considered his answer. “If you’re not sure then you can never go wrong with simplicity. How about silver, with ball ends?”
“Like yours?”
“Like mine.”
Kuroo’s heart did a weird flop. “Yeah,” he said. “Yeah, that’s good.”
Tsukishima smiled and this is how men go blind and led him into one of the back rooms where a small stool and a tray of various equipment were set out. Kuroo tried not to look at them because his imagination conjured visuals far worse than reality could ever be.
“Take a seat there. You’ve been pierced before, and this process is no different.” Tsukishima snapped on a pair of purple latex gloves and cleaned Kuroo’s lip with an antibacterial wipe and used a black marker to make a small dot beneath the swell of his bottom lip. “How does that look?”
Kuroo glanced into the mirror on the wall and nodded. “Good.”
“Okay, I’m going to use this,” Tsukishima picked up a giant pair of glistening forceps, “to hold your lip in position.”
Kuroo’s eyes bugged out at the contraption and he began to sweat. “Tha-- that’s huge,” he managed.
“It doesn’t hurt or anything,” Tsukishima assured him. “It just steadies your lip so the needle doesn’t go in crooked.”
“The needle--”
“It looks like this.” Tsukishima picked it up. “It’s not as bad as you thought, right?”
Okay, so maybe it wasn’t as thick or threatening as Kuroo had envisioned but it still was going to punch a hole through his lip and he might just faint if he saw it coming towards him.
“Can I keep my eyes shut?” he asked.
“Of course.”
Kuroo did just that and he felt Tsukishima pull his lip out and hold onto it with the forceps. He was okay, he was doing okay, he was going to be okay…
“Take a deep breath,” Tsukishima said.
Kuroo obeyed, then a sharp sting went through his lip and he couldn’t help but open his eyes and see the needle sticking out of his lip. And what was that? The warmth dripping from his lip and down to his chin?
“Oh ny god,” he said through motionless lips. “Oh ny god… the glood…”
“Hey,” Tsukishima said. “Hey. Look at me.”
Kuroo tore his gaze upwards and looked straight into honey eyes and began to drown in their warmth and beauty. If he was going to bleed to death, this was surely the way to go. “Hi,” he whispered.
“Hi,” Tsukishima whispered back. "Keep your eyes on me, okay?"
That wasn't a difficult request-- in fact, Kuroo would gladly just sit there all day long and admire the sharp planes of Tsukishima's cheekbones, his milky smooth skin and how long and fluttery hiseyelashes were. If karma was indeed a thing, then Tsukishima had to have done something amazing in his past lives to be an angel walking on this earth today.
You are such a goner, you sap.
Tsukishima’s hands never stopped working and far too soon he stepped back with a small smile. “That’s it. All done.”
“That quick?”
Tsukishima gestured to the mirror. “Take a look.”
Kuroo turned and hot damn . He turned this way and that way, admiring how much more badass he looked now. He couldn’t have asked for a better piercer-- Tsukishima knew his stuff and even better, he was art and he made other people art too.
“How’s that?” Tsukishima asked. “We match.”
“We match,” Kuroo happily said.
“You like it?”
"Yeah," Kuroo said. He gave a wide grin which, to his surprise, made Tsukishima wince. "Is something wrong?"
"Not... wrong, per se," Tsukishima said. He made a vague gesture to his mouth. "You, uh, have blood on your teeth. It looks rather threatening."
"Shit, ha." Kuroo wiped the smile from his face and adopted a glare instead with his teeth bared. "How do I look now? Badass?"
"Badass," Tsukishima confirmed, setting his equipment straight again and beckoning. "Come out front. I'll ring you up and book you in for a follow-up appointment."
They made their way back to the front of the studio where Kuroo paid for his new piercing and zoned out of the spiel on how to take care of it. He'd gone through the routines before and this was hardly any different so he played with his barbell instead-- poking at it with the tip of his tongue and mouthing at it between his lips. It didn't hurt as much as he thought it would and he was so engrossed that he didn't notice Tsukishima frowning at him till it was too late.
Oops. Can't ignore the calls of an angel.
"Sorry, I just really like it," Kuroo said.
"Keep doing that and it won't heal straight," Tsukishima warned. "You want a crooked piercing?"
The thought of the perfectly placed barbell growing slanted made Kuroo's eye twitch and he vowed not to touch it again, at least until it healed, otherwise it'd be a waste of Tsukishima's skills.
"I've booked you in for the same time in two weeks," Tsukishima said. He took a business card from the counter and scrawled the appointment details on the back, ending it with an elegant flick of his wrist and pressing the card into Kuroo's hand. His skin was warm and his touch lingered against Kuroo's.
I'm absolutely besotted, help.
Kuroo wanted to say more and prolong his visit but Tsukishima had already turned away and busied himself with another jewellery display. Kuroo didn't want to call his attention, not when he'd so clearly been dismissed, so he bade a silent farewell and stepped outside to a bustling street filled with noisy pedestrians and blaring traffic. It was such a contrast from the interior of the quiet studio that it took Kuroo by surprise.
He leaned on one of the concrete walls next to a little black crow that looked like it was shitting black paint on his shoulder, and was about to slip the card into his phone case when he noticed something extra written on the back.
Call me. 03-XXXX-XXXX
Kuroo stared at the words with his jaw wide open and almost swallowed a fly. He choked on his spit and whipped around to look through the glass door but Tsukishima had already disappeared.
Oh my god oh my god ohmygod ohmygodohmygod!
Kuroo couldn't control the gigantic grin that broke out over his face and he probably still had blood in his teeth judging by some of the horrified stares he got but who cared about them when he got the number of the most gorgeous man to exist on this plane? Kuroo hurriedly opened up his camera and gave the most terrifying grin and holy hell did he look demonic with his hair spiking up in a hundred different directions and his mouth filled with blood. He took a picture, posted it to Karasuno's page and began writing another five star review to add to their collection.  
10/10 would recommend, should've taken a polaroid like this. Thanks, Tsukishima!
17 notes · View notes
hornsbeforehalos · 7 years ago
Text
Hunter And Arrow: Ten Years Later [Epilogue]
Pairing: Daryl Dixon x OFC
Warnings:  Language, the fact that I wrote it, violence, death,
A/N: I do not own TWD or any of it’s characters besides the OFC’s I’ve created. Do not repost my work anywhere without my permission.
Sorry this took so much longer than I originally anticipated. Having a ‘blah’ moment. :/ <3 
SERIES MASTERLIST
TAGS: @make-things-beautiful2 @reigningqueenofwords@srj1990@jesbakescookies @aquivercactus  @daddy-kink-confirmed@kellyn1604@reedusteinrambles @dragongirl420 @addiction-survivor25@through-thesilver-lining  @redm81@jodiereedus22@docharleythegeekqueen
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“Daaaaad! Wake up! Wake. Up!” Arrow whined, shaking her father’s arm as hard as she could. He jolted up, blinking a couple of times as he assessed his surroundings. Realizing he was in his own home, and not in the place of his nightmares, he grunted as he rubbed his eyes, “What?”
“We’re supposed to go hunting today, Ol’ man, get up.” Arrow commanded him, dropping his bow to the floor at his feet.
“Man, I been waitin’ on you.”
“Sure you have, you ready?” Arrow snorted, a smirk playing on her lips as her dad continued to rub the sleep from his eyes. 
“Yeah, where’s yer mama?” Daryl grunted, voice still thick with sleep.
“In the kitchen fixin’ breakfast for us to take, come on, Daddy, get up.” She replied with another whine, reaching down and grasping his hand to pull him to his feet. He grunted as he stood, his bones cracking as he stretched his limbs out from their stiff positions. 
“Gettin’ too ol’ for this shit, Aare. You’s gon’ have to get yer mama to take you next time.”
“Whatever, ol’ man.” Hunter snorted as she finished loading their Tubbaware dishes down with bacon and eggs and toast as they entered the kitchen. She continued to pack them away as Daryl came up behind her to kiss her cheek and squeeze her waist, earning him a gagging sound from their thirteen year old daughter. 
“Gross.” She spat, sticking her tongue out and scrunching her nose. 
“Yer gross.” Daryl retorted, flipping the girl off who returned the favor as he nuzzled into his wife’s neck, “Thank it’s time she learn how babies is made, wife?”
“I already know, asshole, I live in the same house as you too fuck rabbits.”
“Watch yer mouth, Arrow Rae.” Hunter barked, the smile on her face betraying the snap she intended as her husband continued tickling her neck and face with his stubbly chin. She ducked her neck away from him and used her ass to push him away as she moved to the other side of the kitchen to put the pans in the sink, “Quit damagin’ yer daughter, Daryl. Gon’ give her the wrong idea.”
“About what? She knows what’ll happen if she brangs a boy to this house. Even though I don’ thank tha’s gon’ be the prollem we have...”Daryl teased, smirking smugly at his daughter as he watched her face turn redder than her hair. Arrow looked anywhere but at her parents.
“Mmhmm, I see the way you and Judith look at each other, don’ thank I don’ know, girl. Bes’ watch ya’llselves, though,” Daryl quirked, pointing a finger at her as he stole a piece of bacon from Hunter’s plate, ignoring the swat she gave his hand as he stuffed it into his mouth, “Too young to do more than those looks ya givin’ ‘er, you hear me?”
Arrow rolled her eyes and ignored her mother’s snort, “Whatever, dad. Can we go yet?”
“Ya’ll git outta my house, go play in the woods.” Hunter urged, pushing them towards the door after they grabbed their gear. She smiled as she watched them both flip her off in unison before climbing on the back of his bike and heading towards the gates of the community.
“I got it! I friggin’ got it!” Jerry exclaimed, jumping out of his seat and throwing his hands up in triumph as he turned to his assistant, “Quick, go get His Majesty and tell him to hurry!” 
A lot of things had changed in the 9 years since Jerry had created the vaccine using Arrow’s blood that had begun to save the lives of the remaining population. They had encountered many more enemies once word spread of the growing community of Alexandria and their miracle cure, but each battle that Daryl and Hunter went into side by side always ended in them being the victors. They still didn’t have a lot of the old luxuries that they’d once enjoyed before the world went to shit, but just the fact that they had a way to keep the dead actually dead and protect people from turning was enough hope for everyone. 
Daryl and Arrow were basically inseparable, her being attached to her daddy’s hip from the first time he deemed her big enough for the back of his motorcycle. It was very rare for you to see Daryl Dixon and him not have his fiery, snappy, feisty pouf of red hair following close behind. They would go on runs to the other communities together, to set arrangements with new settlements they’d hear about and to help find lost ones that were seeking refuge and a home. They were the perfect team, especially doing their favorite thing to do together, hunting. 
After spending all day in the thick forest, they’d chosen to spend the night outside the walls, Radioing in to Hunter that they’d be home the next day. Hunter of course made them promise to be careful, knowing that even though that while the dead ones that walked were significantly less in numbers as they had been, it still wasn’t completely safe yet. They’d assured her that they’d be home in time for dinner and sent her kisses goodnight before enjoying each other’s company in front of the fire they’d created.
They were silent a long time before Arrow decided to ask her father the one thing she’d been worried about all day, “You really don’ care that I’m...”
“What, gay?” Daryl grunted, smirking a little as he let out a chuckle through his nose.
"I guess...” She trailed off, her voice quiet.
“Are you gay?”
“I don’ know, daddy. I feel...”
“Weird?”
“Yeah...I guess that’s the best way to describe it.”
“Look, I ain’ no good at shit like this, you know. But I ain’t give a fuck if you like girls.” Daryl assured, lighting a cigarette before turning to face her. Her blue eyes sparkled in the fire light and matched his, relief flooding through her irises as she nodded her head at her father’s acceptance. 
After another bout of quiet Arrow spoke again, “I have another question,”
“What?” Her father rasped.
“Mama tol’ me one time about Paul having a crush on you?”
Daryl couldn’t help the snort that spewed from his nose, almost choking on the smoke that had been residing in his lungs from his latest drag off his cigarette, “Of course she did.”
“So.... did he?”
“I wouldn’t necessarily call it a crush.”
“Then what was it?” Arrow asked quietly, confusion furrowing her brows as she looked at her father. 
“Me and Paul...we were close.”
“How close?” Arrow inquired, eyeing him suspiciously. 
Daryl sighed, not exactly sure if he was ready for his own self-revelation, “We never did what yer thankin’, but...There was somethin’.”
Arrow’s eyes widened upon realization, her breath hitching back a gasp as her mouth opened and closed wordlessly. She didn’t want to push past what he’d already confessed, the knowledge that her dad had dealt with the confusing feelings she was going through was enough to help her feel better. She scooted closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder as he took another drag off his smoke before she stole it from his fingers to take one for herself.
“You better not never tell yer mama I let you smoke.” 
“I’m thirteen, dad, I’m not stupid.”
“Yeah, but I’m stupid for lettin’ you. You cured the dead desease, not Cancer.”
“Fuck you, ol’ man.” She snorted, bringing the stick to her lips and inhaling the toxic smoke.
“Don’ ever tell yer mama what I jus’ told you, either.” Daryl grunted, snatching the cigarette back from her fingers.
“Why not?”
“She’d flip her shit.”
“She already knows, dad.” Arrow replied, cocking her head against his shoulder and nudging him.
“What?” Daryl choked, jerking away from her.
“She knows. I heard her teasing Jesus one day at the Hilltop about it.” 
Daryl exhaled sharply though his nose, his nostrils flaring as he shook his head, “He saved my life, ya know? I thought ya mama was was long dead. Anytime I ever let anyone close to me and they’d die. I never let him get that close, but we had...I dunno, like I said, something.”
“Do you still have that...something?”
Daryl exhaled the last drag of smoke from his lungs, flicking it into the fire as he shook his head again, “Nah. Yer mama’s all I ever needed. I can’t love someone like I love her.”
“I’m certain I got the formulation correct. We just need a test subject, your Majesty.” Jerry mused, his eyes darting around the room as everyone gazed upon the vile in his fingers. The vile that could contain the answer to the world’s biggest problem.
“And who, pray tell, should we have as the test subject?” the King answered sarcastically, “Who is going to want to let themselves be violated by one of the abominations?”
There was silence for a minute before Daryl’s gruff voice could be heard speaking up behind everyone, “I’ll do it.”
Daryl’s thumb ran over the scar on his other hand, the tissue raised and mutilated, but healed. His eyes slid over his daughter’s sleeping form, her red ringlets scattered across her face and mouth slightly ajar to accommodate the soft snores fluttering from her lips. He grinned, she looked just like her mama when she slept. The past ten years with her had brought him so much joy, so much worry, and so much heartache. He still didn’t think he was the father she deserved, that anyone deserved, but the fact that he wasn’t scared of her like he was of his own father made him believe he wasn’t fucking up too bad. The terror in her eyes when he had let the walker bite him all those years ago was embedded in his mind, though, and he’d vowed to never see her that afraid again, even if it was for the greater good. 
He lit another cigarette as he continued to watch her sleep, his ears sharply trained on any danger that might stumble upon them that he would need to protect her from. He’d always known that humans were stupid, selfish, things that only gave a damn about themselves and what someone else could do for them, but even he, the ever cautious and suspicious one, hadn’t even been prepared for the ruthlessness of people after the vaccine was created. People just like Negan and just like Gregory came from all over hoping to use his little girl, but every time a new threat showed themselves, his beautiful wife was there to rip out their throats. 
He remembered when he finally came to understand what made his wife so blood-thirsty when it came to their child. The feeling in his chest when he’d seen a man hold a gun to his seven year old daughter’s head, the look of a pure predator on Hunter’s face as she aimed the sniper rifle at the man’s head. The connection that was almost electric between his two girls, Arrow knowing just when to move her head slightly to the right to avoid the bullet that planted itself between the man’s eyes. 
Hunter Christine Dixon was an anomaly all in her own. She’d changed so much within the time that they were apart in the beginning but in so many ways stayed the same as well. Now, she was an even greater, wiser woman but still just as ruthless as ever. Daryl would fall in love with her over and over and over again for the rest of his life, he thought, no matter how many times they’d threatened to kill each other. She was the light of his life, second only to the sleeping girl who he quietly laid down beside after making sure her blanket covered her properly, the closest thing he could do now that she was so much older to tucking her in. He kept himself alert as he drifted off to sleep in a way that only he could, content with what his life had brought him.
The duo returned back to Alexandria the next day, a large buck with an impressive spread of antlers hoisted up over Daryl’s shoulders, and a small doe being held up by Arrow. They made their way to the front porch where Hunter was waiting, and they each shrugged off the kills at her feet like some kind of offering. 
“You tryna court me ‘er somethin’, Daryl Dixon?” Hunter grinned as he looked up at her proudly, their daughter choking back a laugh as she rolled her eyes.
“Pffft, I shot that one, mama.” Arrow confirmed what her mother already assumed, earning the girl a shove from her father as she climbed the steps.
“Never can let yer ol’ man have anything, can you, banshee?” Daryl complained, hands on his hips.
“Fuck off, dad.” She chuckled as she stood behind Hunter and flipped him off
“Watch that mouth, girl.” Daryl scolded, pointing a finger at her as she stuck out her tongue in his direction before flipping him off again and heading inside to take a shower. 
“You gon’ help me gut these things, girl?” Daryl asked as he pulled the large blade he would be using from it’s place on his hip.
“Not on my front porch, I’m not.” Hunter replied, walking down the steps to hoist the doe up, “I got everything set up ‘round back, come on.” 
Daryl watched her for a moment with the same amazement as he always did as she pulled the deer up onto her shoulders, her tight ass swaying with the weight as she moved the thing around the side of the house. 
“You comin’ ‘er are ya gon’ stand around holdin’ yer dick all day, Dixon?” She called to him teasingly, knowing he was staring at her. 
He reeled himself back into his mind and quickly chased after her, the heat in his groin making him forget all about the buck left on the steps.
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admittedlynotspartacus · 7 years ago
Text
“Game of Thrones” Season VII: Episode 2 - A Foreign Invasion is Underway
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Guys. Sam's acne treatment. The fury of Freddie Mercury. BARACK. AND MICHELLE. Y'all stepped it up. Let's talk about it.
DRAGONSTONE
Lightning. Thunder. And then, in the uppermost window of Dragonstone - THERE’S A LIGHT.
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It’s D-Baby. She’s doing her usual thing of staring moodily out of windows of castles which she’s decided to post up in instead of, you know, TAKING THE THRONE. But then P-Dinky is like, “We’re not gonna stay here long.” And we’re all like -
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But before she ducks outta here, she turns to Varys and does a dramatic recitation of his Wikipedia page and opens up the library on him without mercy.
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Luckily, he passes the test with flying colors and receives a full fucking pardon when he’s like, “I listened to Robert. I listened to your daddy. But you’re the voice of the people, so ya know what -?”
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There is no time for revels though, because Melisandre has warped back here and is notable for being the only lady who didn’t get the memo about wearing black this season.
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Anyway, she starts spewing her usual “Prince That Was Promised” shit. And D-Baby’s like, “But I’m not a prince!” And Michelle is all, “WELL TECHNICALLY, IT’S A BAD TRANSLATION THAT ACTUALLY MEANS ‘PRINCE’ OR ‘PRINCESS...’”
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And we’re all like...
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While at the same time being like, “Like, what is gender, amiright?”
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#TheRealPrinceThatWasPromised
WINTERFELL
So Melisandre’s told D-Baby and co. about J-Snow, and they’ve dispatched a raven summoning him. But Sansa smells fish and is like -
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But we’re all at home like -
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And meanwhile Davos is still like -
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KING’S LANDING
Cersei’s with a bunch of Tyrell bannermen giving a really inspirational speech about how they shouldn’t back D-Baby that basically boils down to -
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And they’re all like, “Yeah but dragons.” And Maester Frankenstein is just like, “Don’t worry guys...
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And we’re all like, “Ohmigod I wonder what it is!!!!” And he takes Cersei down to the dragon lair to show her and we’re like, “Ohmigod we’re gonna find out this episode!” and then he whips the cloth off it and it’s A... giant... crossbow...
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And at first I’m like, “Well, now wait a second. Maybe crossbows don’t exist yet in this world.”
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Aight, N.V.M.
OLDTOWN
One time I went on a 7 hour kayaking trip and didn’t bring sunscreen to reapply. There were blisters. There was pus. And yet it was not one percent as bad as what has happened to poor Daddy Mormont, who basically looks like this -
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Sam thinks he can cure him, but National Treasure Jim Motherfucking Broadbent is like, “You know not the ways.” Even though Sam has clearly risen up the ranks so much that NTJMB and he are already like -
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NTJMB is even asking Sam for thoughts on his new book about the last six seasons of the TV show we’ve been watching. And Sam’s like, “I don’t like the title.” And NTJMB is like, “What would you rather call it?” And we’re all thinking -
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And he doesn’t. Yet. Instead he goes to Daddy Mormont and he’s like -
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Except less chill because he’s got a paint chipper, some rum, a hope and a prayer.
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What follows is the grossest Thrones scene since Grand Maester Pycelle farted last year. Because Sam’s gotta get all this shit off Daddy Mormont by morning, but Daddy Mormont can’t scream. And there’s A LOT OF THIS SHIT ON HIM. So it basically is a combination of -
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and -
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DRAGONSTONE
The gang’s all here and they’re all pissed at D-Baby. Yara’s like, “We gotta attack NOW!” Mama Sand is starting a #NeverLannister movement, and D-Rigg is just like, “Hey, member Margaery?”
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And then P-Dinky - remember him? He used to be the best character? - actually gets to talk and he’s like, going on about how Cersei is going to win banner-men over by appealing to their nationalism.
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So in honor of Made in America week, he’s not outsourcing their plan to attack the cities around King’s Landing. Until he gets to his own home city and he’s like, “Dothraki and Unsullied, you dudes are taking Casterly Rock.”
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Everybody’s V impressed at his sacrifice but also that D&D actually fucking let him drive a scene, so they’re all like -
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Except D-Rigg still seems a little huffy, so she and D-Baby have a private conversation where D-Rigg is basically like, “You’re standing strong and tall. You’re the bravest of them all. If on courage you must call, then just keep on tryin’ and tryin’ and TRYIN’. Be a lion.”
And D-Baby’s just like -
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And then. My dear dear friends. It’s just Barack. And Michelle. Alone. Barack’s headed out, Michelle is staying behind. It’s now or never.
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And Barack just starts on his usual -
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But Michelle is not having it. She’s like, “THIS is the moment.” 
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And then she’s like -
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And then she fucking just goes for his pants but he’s like, “Stop.”
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And she’s like, “Yo, lemme at that D.” But he’s all, “You don’t understand. Six inches forward and five inches back, I got a - I got an angry inch.” And she’s just like -
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And suddenly, it’s just like ASS! BOOBS! ARE WE GONNA SEE HIS STUMPY-STUMP OHMIGOD I HOPE NOT!
And then she lays back like -
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But instead he’s just like -
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And we’re all just like -
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WHEREVER ARYA IS
Arya is full of reunions this week, because at first she’s eating at this inn when who should pop up but fucking HOT PIE! Also revelation that Hot Pie totally looks like Dustin from Stranger Things.
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Oh, he FOUND the chocolate pudding. He found it so hard. So they’re like chilling and she’s like - 
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When Hot Pie acts like the greatest GPS ever known to man and reroutes her to Winterfell by telling her the Boltons are dead. And just like that -
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But first reunion #2. Because we get some creepy POV shots on Arya camping in the woods, plus some growling and snarling. And her horse is acting CRAY. And I’m thinking, “Oh fuck. Ed Sheeran and his bros are back to fucking rape her, QUICK TURN IT OFF!” But lo and behold - it’s a bunch of wolves! Which is still bad until one is like -
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But it’s not gonna eat her or catcall at her, because it’s her old wolf, people! So Arya is like, “Come with me, Nymeria.” But Nymeria is like -
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and she peaces out. Leaving Arya alone to be like, “I see the same sky through my eyes as you see through yours, but we’re worlds apart. Worlds apart.”
WINTERFELL
More RuPaul - Michelle Visage shenanigans as J-Snow finds out about the dragonglass on Dragonstone and is like, “I’m going.”
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But Sansa still smells fish and is like -
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Which then gets everyone to turn on J-Snow, so he’s just like, “You know what? Fuck this. You be queen.”
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But of course Sansa’s just like -
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Meanwhile, Littlefinger is still being a creep.
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THE SEVEN FUCKING SEAS
All right, so here we are with the fucking Sand Snakes.
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Yo I know, I know, but spoiler alert they’re gonna die soon, so it’s all okay. Just first, we have to listen to them have one more dumbass scene where the One Who Showed Her Boobs is like -
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And Whale Rider and The Other One are like, “Mama! Mama! Mama!” And I’m just like -
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But then we go to Yara and Mama flirting while Mama like Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf’s Theon into getting them drinks. And then she’s like, “Aren’t you gonna protect your sister?” And she starts like getting close to her and touching her legs. And then she literally says, “A foreign invasion is underway.”
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But alas, the invasion is cut short, because the ships are being attacked! And it’s like fire! Storming! UNCLE FREDDIE MERCURY!
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And lemme tell ya, he is READY TO GO. It’s just like axes and blood and stabbing. And we’re all like -
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And I’m especially like, “Uncle Freddie Mercury, find the Sand Snakes. Kill them.”
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But Yara finds The One Who Showed Her Boobs first and is like, “Yo, I’m still trying to fuck your mom. Go protect her.” And The One Who Showed Her Boobs is just like, “Got it.” But the other ones aren’t so lucky. Because first he comes for Whale Rider.
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And then without missing a beat he goes for The Other One!
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And then Freddie’s backup boys find Mama and The One Who Showed Her Boobs and Mama’s just like, “Kill us. Get it over with.” And again, I’m just like -
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But of course, it’s Game of Thrones and we can’t have too much of a good thing.
Anyway, it’s full-on Yara vs. Uncle Freddie Mercury time, and meanwhile there’s still these like mystery fire cannons shooting off.
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But THERE’S NO TIME FOR LOGIC! Yara’s about to get her throat slit when Freddie’s just like - “LITTLE THEON!!!”
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And Freddie’s like got an axe to her throat, and Theon could just like... run at her? I guess? And do something? And then Freddie LEGIT Virginia Woolf’s him. Like -
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And Theon’s just like -
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BOOB COUNT: 1 BODY COUNT: 2, plus a lotta extras in that last scene (Rest in Eternal Misery Whale Rider & The Other One) EPISODE GRADE: A-
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SER POUNCE’S STRAY THOUGHTS
I just don’t believe for a second Varys is going to stop conspiring behind people’s backs just because Daenerys made him swear an oath.
After so much hype about this Prince that Was Promised prophecy, it was just a BAD TRANSLATION? I dunno, guys.
I gotta say it, I was Team Sansa for such a long time, but she’s being quite the killjoy this season. And there’s nothing I hate more than being on Team Jon. That said, nothing she’s doing is really stupid. She’s being rightly cautious, but because we know Tyrion and D-Baby aren’t trapping them, it’s creating an interesting conflict for us.
Dickon joins the latest Thrones characters recast over the season break. No more Cormac from Half-Blood Prince.
They love saying “the wars to come.”
I’m so not about Diana Rigg dying, but I fear it is coming.
So just to be clear, the plan was to use Yara’s fleet to transport Ellaria back to Sunspear and get the Dornish army. But now, the fleet has been taken (right?) and Ellaria has been abducted. So none of these armies are technically in the control of Daenerys anymore.
Emmy campaign for Barack please.
So I think it’s safe to say that we can add another Samwise-Samwell parallel in that at the end of all this, Sam will document all these events into an essentially in-world Song of Ice and Fire book.
I’ve loved this Arya plot this season. I thought for sure she was headed down a path into ice-cold vengeance biddy, but this rediscovery of her early days is really lovely and unexpected.
Maisie Williams is so good.
Do we think Littlefinger knows about Jon’s parentage?
It seems as though Yara is still alive.
Two Sand Snakes down. One (and Mama) to go. But you gotta figure Cersei’s gonna take care of them next week. Dreams really do come true.
NEXT WEEK: Freddie Mercury is the champion, Casterly Rock invasion, and J-Snow and D-Baby together at last. Will they fuck?
42 notes · View notes
roseamongroses · 5 years ago
Text
Antithesis: Dear Diary: why?
[Specific-Summary]:  They should expect growing pains. For not everything to feel right or make sense. That doesn't mean it'll always hurt, nor does it mean they can't have fun along the way. It's senior year. Everything may be different. It won't be senior year for long. Everything will be okay.
[General Warnings]: Implied Emotional Abuse, Implied Physical Abuse, Bad Parents are Bad Parents, Mild Sexual Content/jokes,Mentioned Homophobia, Mentions of underage drinking (backround), Some Catcalling,Cursing , Self Hate,implied pregnancy talk/inability to become pregnant, adults arguing where the “kid” can hear it, adults drinking, 
[Tags/mood:] highschool au,  fluff and angst but its all good, chat fic, teen stress, its flordia no snow we die like men [Pairing:] Roceit (Roman Sanders/ Deceit Sanders), hinted future/possible logince/roloceit/loceit [Characters]Roman Sanders/Deceit (Dmitri) Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Logan Sanders, Patton Sanders, Remy (Sleep) Sanders, Nate Sanders, Dragon Witch (Diana) Remus “The Duke” Sanders (minor/brief)
(Ao3) (Previously)
(8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) (15)
(16) (17)
(Note: Please check the general warnings and character list before continuing since some changes have been made and I don’t want to throw you off later on) 
Roman slung the scarf across his shoulders, “You think I should pack this?” he said, striking a pose, “You think it’s gonna be too hot for summer or?”
“You do look good in red...” Dmitri glanced up from his laptop, still typing, “And it’s better than your fifteen--separately bought-- white jeans.”
Roman flung a trench coat at his face. “Glass-fuckin houses babe, half your closet is black and boring--plus I like the white, ” he protested, “And don’t you think the red will be a bit too much with my hair?” he untucked his curls from underneath the scarf, smoothing the sides.
Dmitri laughed, “You’re the definition of a bit too much, Ro,” he said, “But if it means anything the reds been fading for a while now,”
“Wait really?” Roman picked up a hand mirror, angling it with a frown, “Dammit,” he said, “Virgil might still have some bleach left over, but I don’t want to kill my curl pattern like he did…”
“Then don’t redye it,” Dmitri shrugged, “You’ll look good regardless.”
Roman fluffed his hair, pouting in the mirror, “How good?”
Dmitri rolled his eyes, “Fishing early I see,” he said, pausing his typing to take a better look, “The red hair nice, but the brown will soften your features since there ’ll be less contrast.”
“I’dunno if I want to ‘soften my features though...It’d look cute, but...maybe if I cut my hair?” Roman tugged the scarf off, “.…people would take me more seriously.”
“Now why would you…” Dmitri paused, setting his laptop aside nodding, “Come over here, let me take a closer look.”
Roman eyed him warily.
“C’mon now, I’ve been dating you for what? A little over a year, Have a little faith,” Dmitri defended, “I’m not a snake tricking you into sinning,”
Roman crossed his arms, eyeing him up and down, “You’ve done it before--remember?”
“Oh that was fun and you know it, now c’ mere,” He offered a hand.
“It was,” Roman sighed, relenting and taking his hand. Dmitri tugged him to his knees, Roman making panicked noises as they bumped foreheads and he used Dmitri’s shoulders to steady himself, “Close enough?”
Dmitri tilted his head, “A bit closer.”
“Closer?” Roman’s lips barely brushed his.
“There we go--would you look at that,” Dmitri murmured, “A handsome prince if I’ve ever seen one…” Roman’s expression softened and Dmitri continued, “Whoever you’re trying to impress would be stupid not to take you seriously, especially with your anal work ethic--mmph,” Dmitri’s hands flew to Roman’s waist only slightly caught off guard as Roman closed the distance. The sloppy kiss eventually dissolved into Roman peppering Dmitri’s face between giggles.
“Either you’re rewarding me or you’re trying to distract...” Dmitri’s joke died off, eyes fluttering as Roman’s attention dipped lower, trailing his jaw, “Oh that’s...that’s nice…Your brother out?”
“Mhm,” Roman hummed contemplatively, before pulling back a bit, “ Yeah he is, but...I dunno I’m not really in the mood for that…Sorry..”
“You don’t need to apologize every time you know?” Dmitri leaned into Roman’s chest, feeling Roman’s hands nestle into his hair.
“It’s just so...weird.” He could hear the frown in Roman’s voice, “Is it weird? I’m going to be gone for a while too…Am I being a bad boyfriend?”
“You’re not weird, it's normal.”
“But--” Roman’s voice was quiet, “--- it’s not like you’re not attractive-- but--I dunno-- sometimes actually doing stuff like that is just...ugh I can’t even describe it.”
“The other guys might be horny bastards 24/7, but it’s perfectly normal for you Roman.” Dmitri said, “If you want to kiss we can kiss if you want to cuddle and talk we can do that too.”
“Talk’n’cuddle,” Roman mumbled and Dmitri smiled.
“So how are you feeling about the trip?”
“Oh, I’m absolutely horrified--” Roman easily spun into a rant,” I have to be holed up in that infested dung heap with that odorous rat with only my beautiful tia’s cooking as solace?” He sniffed appalled.
“Huh,” Dmitri snickered, “I’ve never heard that nickname for Virgil.”
“I’m not...talking about Virgil.”
---
R: XXX.notalink/rated:m/dontclickfortheloveofgod/dJDoJi90
Rem: WHAT THE FUCK ROMAN Rem: WHY WOULD YOU SEND THAT
L: Why the hell didn’t you read the link first
Rem: WHO THE FUCK READS Rem: GOD NEVER AGAIN
L: I highly doubt it's that bad
L:....I stand corrected
Rem: you clicked the link too didn’t you
L: In the name of science of course
Rem: ROMAN WHY DID YOU SEND THAT
R: ;)
Rem: EXPLAIN YOURSELF
R: ;) XXXX.notalink/rated:m/oopsididitagain/dskfJjfd9dsf3gds
L: That one is more weird than disgusting
Rem: WHY DO YOU KEEP CLICKING ON THEM
L: Why is Roman still sending them?
V: as much as i like smearing my brothers good name that isn’t roman
V: [Roman conked out on the couch, in a sweatshirt and shorts, drool pooling. Jpeg]
Rem: cute photo, 10/10 L: Agreed.
V: god both of you fuckin s t op i t s t o p s t o p
R: XXXX.notalink/rated:m/you filthylinkreaders/d3gds789jk
Rem: just bc you have issues with compliments doesn't mean roman does
L:Here we go again I guess...
V; roman doesnt have any fuckin boundaries
Rem: yes, yes he does Rem: they may be thin but he Does have them
V:sorry but he’s way too nice about it
Rem: weve more then established that me calling him cute is okay and i require the sustenance of doting on him okay? Like i get it ive pushed a bit too hard before but like im trying ok???
V: k k I i hit the breaks a bit too soon this 1 time but it’s ducking thin ass ice and I’m not above sending y’all to an icy tomb if you get gross. Roman may be a bastard but he’s still baby
L:Translation: He understands your reasoning and agrees he overreacted, but this won’t stop him from questioning our intents and calling out certain actions. Roman may be okay with joking around with stuff like that and being the center of attenuation, but he’s still self conscious and sensitive.
V:why must you add feelings and adult reasoning to everything
L: How dare you accuse me of having feelings
R: XXXX.notalink/rated:m/unicornhornsanddragontails/3nskjJ03 R: XXXX.notalink/rated:m/specA-Z/54Kjjf9n R: XXXX.notalink/rated:m/asliceofme/fljkl29mfJ
R: XXXX.notalink/rated:m/laughsinspanish/5Kjd8
Rem:ye feelings are gross so moving on
Rem: anyway who the fuck is this
V: the bastard
R: you can call me duke [video of Roman, Virgil, and Remus as toddlers, Virgil playing with blocks and listening to some music while in the background Remus follows Roman around.mp3] [image of Roman, Virgil, and Remus currently. jpeg]
V: the bastards name is remus
R: THE. DUKE.
V: FUCK. YOU.
Rem: why the shits have i never met them and why the FUCK does he look more like roman then you do virgil
V: i think it's bc rem doesnt cover up his freckles
V: but yeah my mom and tia had a falling out
R: more like my dad was an asshole
Rem: oh shit same
R: shitty dad squad hmu ;)
Pat: oh hey!!! Me too!!!!
V: yeah it was Not Fun and mom and mama refused to let us go back until tia got a divorce
R: XXXX.notalink/rated:m/deodarant/298jksf
R:XXXX.notalink/rated:m/sPicydeodarant/23kjfJ
L: Are you done yet? They’re getting repetitive at this point.
---
Sun beating on his forehead, Dmitri’s chest was light and airy. His hair was tied up in a high ponytail as he worked on repotting some of his nursery plants. Usually, he’d be listening to music, but his aunt had left early that morning for some appointment so he relished the silence.
Brushing the dirt from his hands, he winced at the fresh cuts lining his knuckles.
“You’re still out here?”
Dmitri almost jumped at Dr. Montag’s voice, “Sorry for the mess” he said, gripping the nursery pot tighter, “I-I’ll clean it up right away…”
Dr. Montag crouched, waving him off, “There’s no need. I’m running a few errands for your aunt,” his hands barely brushing the leaves of one, “This is a Yucca right?”
“Uh,” Dmitri blinked, “Yeah it is,”
He laughed, “Don’t look so surprised-- I know things,” he stood back up, “Like how to use google. It’s rather impressive that y’all manage to keep up with so many of these.”
“Barely,” Dmitri relaxed, refocusing, “We used to have a lot more, but without my dad...it got overwhelming,” he shook his head, “It’s the only thing we really….It keeps us busy..”
“This is more than busy--you put a lot of work into these, anyone should be proud,” He murmured, studying Dmitri again, “I’ll be gone in a few, just need to grab her purse. You need anything from the store?”
“Uh...No,” Dmitri frowned, “I don’t.”
---
LilRed: COLLEGE BOARD CAN SUCK MY ASS LilRed: THIS BITCH GOT A FIVE
BlueRanger: Which class?
LilRed: APUSH
BlueRanger: Nice, good job
LilRed:
LilRed:
PurpleRain: L you fuckin broke him
PurpleRain:like I legit just heard a fuckin thud I think he fell
BlueRanger: I just told him good job?
LilRed: i die from validation i die w/o validation
BlueRanger: Please don’t die
PurpleRain: thats a lame ass way to die
LilRed: @purplebitch i feel so loved
PurpleRain: mama didnt raise us for us to die so b o r i n g l y
LilRed: SO HOW DO YOU SUGGEST I DIE
PurpleRain: idk im feelin,,,,rain,,,,,lots of it,,, maybe you’re watching the sea,,,,
PurpleRain: okay I got it
PurpleRain: you’re wearing a white sundress, the ends tattered but well loved. The coast empty with nly the lapping of waves your company. You’re thinking, a lot. Not of anything particular, but thinking nonetheless. The ocean always makes you think, always makes you remember--bringing about a bittersweet tinge of remorse to your heart, but no tears ever fall.
PurpleRain:You make it a habbit to watch the sunrise each day, relishing in the sobering feelings it invokes Maybe you're a masochist at heart
LilRed:maybe it’s maybelline
PurpleRain:I AM HAVING A MOMENT PRINCEY
PurpleRain: one day, you hear footsteps approach, and assume it's your lover returned from war. The news of it's end just coming days prior and making your ventures to the coast sparked with an unfamilar hopefulness.
PurpleRain: instead when you turn around, you do not feel your heart soar. Instead it sinks. An icy panic spreading through you, a curl of dread closing your throat, it's grip tight. You need to move; to get away from them. But you cant. You cant.
PurpleRain: one shot is all it took.
PurpleRain: one.
BlueRanger:....Concern.
PurpleRain: dnd just started again im prepping ok
LilRed:fuckin nerd
LilRed: huh…. i should get a sundress tho
PurpleRain: i have a few bookmarked ill show you later
BlueRanger: Is That Really What Y’all Are Taking Away From This
---
“And so the shop explodes-no not explodes it's in flames and they have the audacity--the au,” Roman coughs readjusting the webcam, “They have the audacity to play ‘Somebody to love’ as he’s fuckin mourning,” he gestured angrily, “Like Neil might as well come into my house and stomp on my heart.”
Dmitri nodded along, amused at the combination of camera lag and Roman’s erratic movements, “Before or after you watch the next episode?” he asked.
“It’s gonna have to be after cause I already finished the season. I never recovered from that scene though, ” Roman shrugged, tapping his jaw thoughtfully, “Probably should’ve started working on my commission sheet,”
“The same sheet you said you were going to start last month?”
“Yes the same one,” Roman blew out an exasperated huff, flopping into his hands, “I don’t know why it’s so hard --I feel scummy for pricing ‘too high’ and like shit for pricing ‘too lo--,” A notification rang, and he glanced over the screen, eyebrow raised, “Huh, Lo’s callin’ to video chat, you mind if I add’em?”
“Nah, go ahead,” Dmitri said, starting to fold the pile of towels.
“Alrighty,” He answered the call, “What’s up ner-” his face lit up, “Princess!”
Giggles erupted from the screen and Dmitri glanced up curious. On the screen instead of Logan was a small girl animatedly talking to Roman. She had two front teeth missing, glitter coloring her cheeks and rainbow beads rattling each time her braids moved.
“Woah, Woah-Woah,” Roman snorted, “Slow down hon, where’s your brother? Does he know you’re using his computer?”
“He’s in the shower,” she said, batting her eyes, “And know is a very strong word, but I can assure you he’s...aware?”
“Mmm, I won’t tell if you don’t,” he said, “So what’s the fairest of the land need?”
She beamed, “You at my birthday party.” she said, more of a command than anything.
Roman made of show of mulling it over, unable to keep a straight face, “I think I can make it.”
Her fist punched the air, “Ya--”
“Nieve,” Logan’s voice called out sternly.
Her eyes shot wide and she scrambled out of frame. Seconds later, Logan reappeared in the frame without his glasses, towel tucked to his chest. He didn’t look particularly mad.
He squinted blearily at the screen, “Roman? “ his gaze slid over, “Dmitri? Shit sorry did she bug you?”
“Not at all,” Roman reassured, “It’s been a while since I came over anyway,”
Logan grabbed their glasses, adjusting the frames, “Yeah...I guess it has...Since you’re here did you get that email from the school?”
“Yeah, it’s bullshit, “ Roman said, rolling his eyes, “If the state cared they would have found the funds somewhere else, it’s all shady as fuck. ”
Logan nodded, saying goodnight before disconnecting.
As soon as his icon disappeared, Roman said, “Huh, that...reminded me,”
Dmitri started on the next pile of laundry, “Of what?” he said, brow pinched, concerned.
“I’ dunno something Remy brought up…” Roman said, playing with his hands, “It’s stupid really but---”
He yelped falling to the floor, Remus victoriously sliding into the rolling chair. He spun wildly, the web camera a laggy blur, with only loud obnoxious kissing noises heard amongst the screaming.
Eventually, Remus slowed down, and it was jarring how much he and Roman looked alike. It was more unnerving seeing such a sleazy look with Roman’s face.
“Oh Dmitri,” Remus mocked, even adopting the heavy accent Roman usually placed on his name, “Embrace me with those big, long artist hands of yours, god I’m going to melt--"
“Shut up--shut up! You Rat-- give it back-give it back--” Roman whined, clambering over the chair, elbowing him, “Give it back, fuckin- MOM,” At one point Roman managed to wrestle the laptop from Remus, kicking him out of the chair and sending him off with a finger-- which Remus promptly returned.
Dmitri’s silently wheezed as Roman turned around visibly frazzled, “God I forgot what I was say-Are you laughing at me?” he said, “Stop it--stop laughing it’s not--”
“It-” Dmitri’s covered his mouth, shoulders shaking “It kinda is,” He said between snorts, only laughing harder at the offended noises Roman made.
As his snickers died down, Roman crossed his arms, “You done yet?” he sniffed.
“Yeah…” he gasped, “Yea...h... I am…” he blinked a bit, a slow smile spreading across his face, “So... what’s this about my hands?”
Roman’s eyes shot wide, incoherent babbling coming from his mouth as his ears turned a bright cherry. He slowly shrank out of frame to promptly die.
---
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