#and had the BALLS to ask me not to use the microwave at 11 AM for my oatmeal bc she was sleeping 🗿

[spookyserenades]

Pov ur trying to find roommates for college…

Ohhh man I do not envy you.... my roommates were NIGHTMARESSSSSS but like usually you end up making good friends freshman year that you can try and room with the following year 💜

[meltwonu]

| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 20] FINAL

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, sex toys, shibari, dom!seungcheol, dirty talk, overstimulation/forced orgasms, squirting, degradation, name calling, daddy!kink, gags! 😍💕 ✨HAPPY NEW YEAR!!✨ Here’s to more fun fics in 2021! I can’t believe this is our last chapter though omg 😭 It’s been suuuuch a journey and a privilege to write this little series out! I’ve honestly thought about a camgirl/boy series for like, over a year now, and I’m glad I finally did it! I completed one of my goals! 🥺💕 2020 was definitely a wild one, but I want to thank you all so fuckin’ much for supporting me and stickin’ it out with me all year! Here’s to more in the coming year!💕 Also I was proofreading this at the dining table last night thinking my roommate wouldn’t come out of their room but they did(while I was making dinner and my hands were dirty so I couldnt close my laptop ☠️) and they walked past my laptop and now I’m convinced they saw my fucking smut fic right in the open so yes my little mini-break next week is MUCH needed cause I am ✨embarrassed✨ 🤣 I’ll still do my inbox roundup tomorrow and probably answer a bunch of small thirst posts ‘n stuff throughout the week but there won’t be any drabbles! For now, enjoy chapter 20 🥺, have a safe weekend, and remember that I love you~ ❤️🍒💕

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 COMPLETE

Seungcheol wakes up much earlier than you do the next morning; pressing a kiss to your forehead as you groan and snuggle deeper into your pillow.

“Baby, I need to go run some errands for a little bit, okay? Just keep sleeping, you don’t need to get up yet. But, I made breakfast and put it in the microwave for you when you decide to get up later.”

His voice is muffled and you can barely understand what he’s saying but you nod; a soft sigh on your lips when you drift back into dreamland. He takes his time getting ready, checking his phone notifications as he gets dressed and places a note on the nightstand knowing that you didn’t catch a single word he said.

‘Hey, did you get everything I asked for?’

Jimin🧍🏻: of course, who do you think I am? Jeongguk?

Jimin🧍🏻: and btw, i’m just giving you a crash course okay? We don’t really have a ton of time

Jimin🧍🏻: did you watch those tutorial videos I sent you?

‘Yeah, I did some practice on my breaks, but I guess you can tell me if I’m doing anything wrong.’

Jimin🧍🏻: okee, i’ll be waiting. Don’t get here too late!

‘I’ll be otw soon. Thanks again, Jimin.’

“Ow--damn, okay, you don’t need to tug on it so much!”

“Sorry, I’ll be careful! And why are we practicing on you anyway?! Couldn’t you just have shown me pictures or something?”

“How else will you learn if not on an actual body? It doesn’t work the same way, Seungcheol.” Jimin pauses, checking himself in the mirror. “Also, keep in mind she does have boobs so just… go slow, okay? It’s not gonna sit like this on her.”

Seungcheol blushes a crimson red; biting the inside of his cheek at how amateur he was at this.

“Okay…”

Seungcheol is gone for a lot longer than you anticipate and although he replies quickly to your texts, you can’t help but be curious about where he’d gone and what he was doing.

Especially knowing that the two of you had to film tonight and knowing that everything was up to Seungcheol.

A shiver rolls down your body at the thought and you quickly try to shake off the nerves that seem to slowly invade your body when your mind starts to wander.

“It’ll be fine, I’m sure…”

“I’m home!”

“Where have you--oh, that’s… a b-big box? Um, should I be concerned...”

Seungcheol grins, shrugging as he sets it onto the kitchen counter. “Just some supplies for tonight. I had to go pick them up from a friend but I had to make sure everything was right.” He notices the way you can’t seem to take your eyes off of the box; eyes twinkling when he makes his way towards you.

He tilts your head up to meet his in a searing kiss, lips easing into a smile when you wrap your arms around his neck and melt under his touch. You moan against his lips just before he pulls away; staring dreamily at him while his hands start to roam over your clothed body.

“We have a long night ahead of us, sweetheart. Let’s pamper you a little before then, hmm?”

j__min: ??? where’s the loverboy

j__min has donated $200

angelhan has donated $75

therealchan99 has donated $50

xcaliburDK has donated $75

xcaliburDK: is that the sybian? Haven’t seen that in a looong while

You bite your lip and nod, somewhat shy as you sit alone in front of the camera. “Seungcheol’s still… setting up but he told me to start! I’m a little nervous, to be honest…” Your eyes flit to Seungcheol who rummages through the box in the kitchen and from the angle you’re sat in, you can’t see a single thing he takes out.

Earlier, he’d cooked you your favorite meal and even took the time to give you a full body massage before the two of you cuddled on the sofa and watched a movie. To you, it seemed a little too suspiciously tame and you only found yourself more nervous when he made you drink two glasses of water and ever so quietly announced it was time to start getting ready for the camshow.

“He’s being so suspicious! He was even gone for a few hours earlier today…” You mumble; brows furrowed at the camera before checking the comments.

It still amazed you every time with how much money you and Seungcheol made from the camshows and videos and it made you feel even better knowing that everyone loved the chemistry the two of you had together. There were a lot of video requests and ideas mixed in with the comments at any given time and you were definitely ready to pitch some to Seungcheol now that you’d rebranded your channel to be a couple’s channel instead.

“Almost done, sweetheart!”

gc__koo: he told me to watch cuz he was being suspicious with me too 

gc__koo has donated $50

alphagyu97: what is he even plotting

alphagyu97: i am excited to see the sybian again tho ngl

artist8hao: pretty baby gonna squirt for us again?

universe_WZ: hell fuckin yea let us see how fuckin wrecked you get on that machine

You feel your pussy clench around emptiness at their comments; already feeling yourself getting wetter and wetter with the anticipation.

Movement out of the corner of your eye catches your attention and Seungcheol walks towards the bed with a wide smile and the same box in hand. “Ready?” You can only nod back slowly, watching as he dumps the contents of the box right next to your body.

gc__koo: oy

chwenon: oh shit

sleepy_wonu: oh baby, you’re in for it now

sleepy_wonu has donated $100

Your entire body fills with warmth as you look over the various objects; unsure of where to really look first. “I, um--”

A stack of red ropes sits next to a small bullet vibrator that sits next to a ball gag that sits next to a pair of EMT shears and your eyes immediately flit up to Seungcheol who only smirks back at your shocked expression. “I had some other toys I wanted to use but I figured I should go easy on you, y’know? Since you showed me some mercy last night.”

Nodding, you reach out towards the ropes, touching them shyly. “Why red?”

“Thought they’d be on theme for you, babygirl.”

Seungcheol takes his time; remembering Jimin’s words when he tugs the ropes around your wrists.

“Colour, babygirl?”

“G-green… daddy…”

He nods, sitting up on his knees behind you as you sit on the sybian and face the camera. You bite your lip, somewhat embarrassed that you were already soaking the toy underneath you as Seungcheol worked to bind your arms behind you.

“D--daddy, where did you l-learn this?” You whisper, somewhat curious if this had anything to do with why he was gone for so long earlier in the day.

“Mm, daddy’s friend Jimin was kind enough to help me get the tools and teach me a few tricks to make sure I kept my babygirl safe. Wasn’t that kind of him?” You nod gently, gulping when you shift atop the machine slightly in hopes of relieving some of the growing sexual tension in your body. “Why don’t you thank him properly, sweetheart?”

Your hazy eyes make eye contact with the camera, head tilted slightly. “T-thank you, J-Jimin… for--for helping daddy…”

j__min: omg a shoutout ive made it

kitty_junjun: we never thought we’d see the day

tangerine_kwan: and here we all thought you were gonna be the bad guy huh

hoshi_tiger_xx: like when u only see previews of the book online but the rest of it is different ykwim

Seungcheol makes sure your arms are bound snug enough but not too tight; leaning away slightly to admire his rope work. “Feeling okay so far, babygirl?”

Nodding, you whine back slightly. “Y-yes, daddy… But… my--my pussy wants s-something…” He laughs in return, readjusting so that he’s sitting on your side this time to give himself easier access to start the rest of the bindings.

“Is that so? You’re gonna have to be a little more patient this time ‘cause daddy’s not done yet.” He starts working on the rest of the harness; going slow and checking in with you often to make sure none of the ropes were digging into your skin or making you uncomfortable. “You’ll have to forgive me a little though, I’m admittedly a ‘lil inexperienced so our pretty babygirl is only going to be tied up in this pretty harness for tonight.”

gentleman_josh95: the fact u even took the time to learn just for her

gentleman_josh95 has donated $100

artist8hao: seriously, the dedication

kitty_junjun: we stan a man who knows safety and etiquette 

Comments of reassurance and donations flood in at Seungcheol’s small apology and although the two of you are in your own world; you can tell from just the amount of pings coming from your laptop that they all seemed to be encouraging him.

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence as Seungcheol continues to move around you on the bed to finish the harness and a smile graces his lips when he starts to secure the last knots in the back. He can’t help but mentally pat himself on the back at how neatly he’d done it for his first time.

“There. All done, baby.”

Your eyes flit to the laptop’s screen to see yourself; cheeks hot when you see how fucked out you already look and he hadn’t even touched you properly or turned on the machine.

The star harness Seungcheol had tied looks pretty with red ropes and you can’t hide your smile at how good it looks on you too either. “Ah, daddy made it really p-pretty… Thank you.”

This time, Seungcheol nods, letting you admire yourself as he silently reaches for the small remote for the sybian, switching it on.

Your entire body lurches forward as soon as the vibrations attack your clit and you immediately find yourself moaning and grinding down onto the machine as he gives you some relief.  

“You’re welcome, babygirl. Now let’s really have some fun, huh?”

You need to cum.

Badly.

“Awww, is my pretty baby drooling? Does it feel that good on your sensitive ‘lil clit?” He teases, smoothing down your hair as you cry around the ball gag in your mouth; drool seeping out from the side of your lips when he raises the vibrations a setting higher.

You don’t know how many times he’d played with the settings and edged you by now, but all you do know is that the urge to cum only grows stronger as you grind against the machine, soaking it with your wetness as you chase the pleasure building up in your body again.  

Surely cumming was okay, right? He never said you couldn’t.

You whimper around the ball gag, eyes fluttering shut when the tension in your body snaps in the blink of an eye and your thighs clamp down onto the sides of the machine. Throwing your head back, you moan against the gag and ride out your high as Seungcheol watches you from the side.

“Mm, bet that felt good, huh? But I know you want something in that greedy ‘lil cunt of yours, don’t you? You want daddy’s cock slamming into your tight ‘lil hole ‘til it’s full of my cum, right, sweetheart?” He licks his lips, turning off the sybian as you slump forward.

universe_WZ: shit shes so sensitive

chwenon: especially with her arms bound like that i bet she’s on cloud nine rn

gentleman_josh95: her cute lil head is probably all fuzzy already from all the sensations

therealchan99 has donated $100

gc__koo has donated $75

j__min has donated $150

All you can do is whimper and nod; teary eyes blinking back at Seungcheol as he smirks and leans in towards you.

“Mmm, you’ll get what you want eventually. But for now, you’re gonna cum again.”

He turns the sybian back on, licking his lips when he sees your body tensing again. It was always easier to get you to cum a second time and his point is proven when you mewl around the ball gag a few minutes later; chest heaving in stuttered breaths as you try to shy away from the toy still vibrating against your overly sensitive clit when you’re quickly thrown into another orgasm.

“You always cum for daddy so easily, don’t you, babygirl?”

Your head feels fuzzy after already cumming twice in such a short span of time but you nod, head lolling to the side as Seungcheol finally turns the sybian off for good.

Seungcheol gives you a second to catch your breath before he’s scooting in and fiddling with the clasps at the back of your head to take the ball gag off.

A thread of saliva connects your lips to the gag and you whimper at how good it feels to be able to actually speak again. “D-daddy…” Drool drips from your mouth as your lead lolls forward and Seungcheol is quick to bring a hand up to keep your head up as he looks into your lust filled eyes.

“Colour, sweetheart?”

“Still g-green…” He nods back, checking to make sure none of the ropes had shifted. “Would you like some water before we continue, baby?”

“Yes, daddy…”

He fetches you a glass of water, tilting it against your lips as you down the entire glass and you find yourself a little surprised at how needed it was. “Thank you, d-daddy…”

“You’re welcome, babygirl. Ready to keep going?”

You nod, a little bit more energized. “I hope everyone, mmh, l-likes the show so f-far~” Your teary vision prevents you from reading the comments and before you can even make an effort to, Seungcheol is already helping you off of the machine and helping you sit on the bed across from him.

alphagyu97: ugh she looks so fucking good in that harness

angelhan: right? That shade of red looks so good against her skin too

angelhan: so fuckin pretty

tangerine_kwan: pics for the private room later? Plz i beg

Seungcheol takes this time to take off his boxer briefs, cock curving up against his abdomen when he’s fully naked across from you. He wraps a hand around his cock, moaning and spreading the precum down his shaft as you watch. “D’you want this, baby?”

Your lips fall open in a silent moan as you watch Seungcheol jerk himself off and you can’t help but squirm. “Y-yes…”

“Tell me exactly what you want then. Let them hear what a filthy little slut you are for me.” You can’t help but feel miserably empty watching him and despite having already cum twice, you want his cock fucking you open and making you cum again.

“I--I--”

“Yes, babygirl?”

“I, ngh, I want d-daddy’s cock… Please? Ah, I--I wanna feel you fucking my--my pussy into the, mmh, s-shape of your c-cock… And I w-want you to c-cum inside my--my slutty little h-hole…”

Seungcheol scoffs, hips shallowly thrusting up into his enclosed fist. “That’s right. You’re just my slutty ‘lil babygirl that lets me use all her tight holes how I please, right? You like it when I cum down your throat and in your pretty ‘lil ass. But we all know you like it best when I cum in your hot ‘lil cunt. Makes you feel all warm and full, doesn’t it? You like it when my cum is dripping out of your spent cunt and sliding down your shaky thighs.” This time you nod furiously as you whine back in response.

“P-please… Can’t wait any--anymore!”

This time, the impatience takes over as you slightly tug on the ropes; whining when they don’t give. “Daddy!”

And this time, he gives in quicker than he anticipates, growling as he reaches for the EMT shears to cut you from the harness. “Don’t let your arms down, no matter how much you want to. You’re going to strain your arms if you move too fast so let me handle it, okay, sweetheart?”

The sudden gentleness in his voice has a giddy warmth pouring over you as you nod and sit still while he cuts at various points of the harness to make the ropes fall loose around your arms and chest. You keep your arms in the same position like he requested and you soon feel his hands roaming your skin and massaging your arms to get the blood flowing again.

“You’re so good for me, baby.” He whispers against your hair, leaning down to kiss your shoulder before he slowly easing your arms down from being folded behind your back.

He continues to massage your arms for a few more minutes before it’s you that’s getting impatient. “Daddy… Can you fuck me now?” Whispering, you slightly turn your body to the side to meet his gentle stare.

Seungcheol laughs under his breath, nodding. “Lay on your back for me, legs spread.”

You follow his orders as you quickly scramble to get into position; legs spread wide for him to situate himself between.

“Mm, your pussy is still so fuckin’ wet. I wanna taste you on my tongue, baby.” Whines spill from your lips as you shake your head ‘no.’

“No! My p-pussy feels empty, I need y-your cock, daddy… ‘n I’m so wet, you can probably, ah, just s-slide your cock in…”

He wraps a hand around his cock just as you wrap your legs around his waist and he guides himself until the head of his cock is right at your entrance.

Neither of you say a word as he slowly starts to sink his cock in; guttural moans on his lips when he meets no resistance and bottoms out in a singular thrust. “Holy fuck, your cunt is so fuckin’ wet. Shit, and so t-tight!” You clench around him, already feeling good with his cock inside of you as you beg him to fuck you hard and fast.

“Ngh, p-please fuck me like--like I’m your, hah, c-cocksleeve… I want it f-fast, daddy!”

He grits his teeth at your words; drawing his hips back before snapping them into you just how you wanted. “Fast, hmm? All you think about in that pretty head of yours is my cock pounding you open, huh? Slamming into you so fuckin’ good, it makes your toes curl when you cum.”

Seungcheol starts a quick pace, already feeling the pleasure building up for himself when you’re reduced to garbled noises and broken cries of his name. The heels of your feet dig into the small of his back as you try to press him in closer and he’s quick to reach for the small bullet vibrator left on the bed next to your body.

“Your body is so fuckin’ sensitive, I can already feel how tight you’re getting around me. So fuckin’ greedy to cum too. Already came twice and you still want more. You’re not satisfied until your whole body is shaking underneath me, huh, sweetheart?” He turns the small toy on, pressing it to your clit as you yelp and let out choked sobs.

“Ah, ngh, d-daddy, my--my clit’s t-too sen--sensitive! I--I can’t--!” Squirming, you feel the pressure building up obscenely quick; bottom lip quivering when he takes one of your free hands and makes you hold the toy to your swollen clit.

“Just a little more, sweetheart. Don’t you wanna cum?”

He angles his thrusts to graze against your g-spot and loud cries of his name leave your lips in a hurried, jumbled mess when he only doubles his pace.

The sound of donations and comments pour in like water and get lost within the ringing in your ears; unable to even warn Seungcheol that you’re about to cum when you feel your entire body starting to lock up underneath him.

Your lips part in a silent scream and your back bows off of the bed, thighs shaking uncontrollably as you cum for the third time. Seungcheol growls, fucking you through it as you squirt all over his lower half.  He finds it harder and harder to thrust into you as you cum, but he feels himself quickly following suit with your warm walls fluttering around his cock.

“Fuck, baby, that’s right. Squirt for me, get me fuckin’ soaked while you cum.” He uses a free hand to make sure you keep the toy pressed to your clit, growling when he starts to unload his cum inside of you. “Mmh, gonna fill your cunt up with what you want, baby.”

A shaky moan leaves your lips as you feel him throbbing inside your pussy; walls clamped down onto him in a vice grip as you ride out the remnants of your orgasm.

“Ah, d-daddy’s cumming suh--so much inside of my p-pussy…”

Whining, you feel Seungcheol’s grip on your hand give way as he rides out his pleasure and you take the opportunity to turn off the small bullet vibrator while he doesn’t notice.

You watch his face contort in pleasure, hips still shallowly thrusting into you as his entire body shivers above you.

“D-daddy’s so h-handsome...” You mumble, cheeks hot when he cracks a smile through the pleasure wracking his body and chuckles under his breath. 

“Thank you, babygirl.” 

After you end the show, Seungcheol makes sure to cuddle with you on the bed for a little while longer.

“One more glass of water, baby.” You whine in response, pouting up at him before he gets up from the soaked sheets. 

“But I already had a glass! If you have a piss kink just say so, ‘Cheol!”

He lets out a boisterous laugh at your comment, trudging back to the bed from the kitchen with another glass of water for you. “You need to be hydrated, sweetheart. You came three times and we played a little more rough today. I just wanna make sure you’re okay.” 

“Fine, but you didn’t deny my comment.” You snarkily reply, taking the glass from him as you down the water. 

“Don’t make me have to punish you again! I’ll have you know I still need to get you all washed up and change the bed--”

A faint pinging has the two of you turning to the laptop; still on your camming homepage from where you’d checked the revenues from tonight’s show. 

A small [1] sits above your inbox and Seungcheol is quick to turn to you with an eyebrow raised. “I thought you turned off the messaging system on your profile?” 

You tilt your head in confusion, handing him the emptied glass. “I did. The only messages I should get are from, like, the actual system admins or other creator accounts which, I haven’t received any ‘til... now, I guess?”

Seungcheol sets the glass down onto the nightstand before he takes a seat next to you, dragging the laptop closer as you go to check the notification. 

“’Love&Letter Films’? Aren’t they one of the biggest adult film companies?” Mumbling, you click on the message, giving yourself and Seungcheol a second to process the message that stares back at you; a shocked smile on your lips.

‘Hello!

I hope this message finds Cherry and Seungcheol well. 

We, at ‘Love&Letter Films’, have really enjoyed the shows and videos from your channel throughout the years and we really have enjoyed watching the growth of your channel and the addition of Seungcheol to it. The dynamics between the two of you are rare in this industry and we’ve yet to see anyone like the two of you in this market. 

The shows from the last two nights have proven that the two of you have the right kind of chemistry to film together for bigger productions and we would love to hire you for a few film productions we have planned in the upcoming weeks as a feeler. Of course, all expenses paid by us if you would kindly take our offer. 

We love the various scenes and roles that the two of you take on with ease and we would love to help propel your careers forward, should you pursue a career in the adult entertainment industry. 

Please don’t hesitate to contact me as I’ve listed my contact information below. I’m excited to hear from the two of you and hope to work with you in the future on many projects.

Respectfully, 

Kwon Soonyoung, L&L FILMS CEO’

[grantiskeith]

Baby Wolf Cub (Davidxreader) Part 2

I don't know about anyone else, but this stopped being about ASMR a long time ago. Redacted's storytelling ability and world-building skills are fantastic. I would 100% read a book if he wrote one.

Here is part 2 of the first fic I have ever written.

Words: 1.8k

Warnings: dad vibes, blood, gunshot

"Hello?" I picked up my ringing phone "what! Who is this!" David picked his head off the floor, ears perking up. The little pup yawned and stretched against David's fur.

"Where? Tonight?" Click. 11:14 pm. David shifted back into his human self which prompted the sleeping cub into a sleeping baby with its butt in the air. "What's going on?"

I dialed another number without answering him."Milo, hey I need you to come over. It's an emergency. No, no one's hurt but we need your help. Yeah, thanks"

Click. "They followed me from Chicago, they want the kid back." I walked to the little one one and bent over to pick him up. David stuck his hand out in front of mine.

"Don't touch him, let him sleep. Shifting takes magic and doing it as often as he is would be exhausting for a full grown adult. He'll figure it out, but he needs sleep. Now what the hell are you talking about? Who called? Stop! don't put your jacket on"

"I don't know who, all I know is that there's a lead on the corner of South and Maple and I'm going to figure out what's going on." I did put my jacket down but only to grab a light blanket off the couch and draped it over the baby's legs.

"Angel, that's too dangerous, they could be vampires or murderers or..."

"They're most likely kidnappers, which is why we need to stop them"

"Listen to yourself! You're not Sherlock Holmes, you're not Batman"

Angel put his hands on my shoulders and looked into my eyes, "you're just a fragile human and you need to stay here and be safe."

"It's not your job to protect me"

"Actually it is. As soon as you became my mate you became part of the pack. As the Alpha and your mate it is my duty to take care of you" he backed up from me and rubbed his hands over his face. "I love you Angel! I would give my life for you without question"

"I would never ask you to!" I said that a little louder than I should and the baby turned over before it started crying. I went over to pick him up but David got to him first and subtly bounced him on his hip.

"Why are you putting something so special to me in harm's way? You are a fucking danger to yourself and the more you get involved in these messes the more likely you are to put me and my pack in the line of fucking fire. There are things about the magic world that you don't understand and there are more threats than you can see. Let's ignore that call and just take this trouble maker to the department."

I put my head down to the floor. It was late and I was tired. Almost a half tempting offer. But there was a mystery to be solved here and possibly a larger crime.

"Sitting in bed and watching tv does not help anyone," I told him. "I am the mate of one of the most influential wolf pack's alpha. You know I'm tough or else you know I wouldn't last long. I was made of something durable and built for being more than a fucking house wife!"

David put the baby on the couch and laid the blanket out next to him. Carefully, he wrapped the little one up into a burrito and scooped him up to cradle him.

"Before you go and get your life sucked out by a damn shade or something. Throw a cup of milk in the microwave for a few seconds" David said, sitting down on the couch.

"Uh sure" I said. "I am not a complete dumbass, I know I shouldn't go alone. If you won't come and back me up then I will ask Milo." I handed him a lukewarm glass. "How did you get so good with infants anyway?"

Silence from David. I hate it when he just shuts down. He propped the baby up against his chest and titled the cup up until the little one could drink.

"Instinct, basic life skills, common fucking sense. All things you don't possess, clearly" he put the cup down on the table. And took a deep breath. "My dad… he would make me help out new moms in the pack. He used to say I needed to spend time with women since my mom wasn't around. It was a way of helping the pack feel more like a family"

I sat down next to him. Coat on, shoes on, ready to jump out the door.

"Angel, I have lost so damn much. Just from life already being as fucking dangerous as it is. If something happened to you... I just... I don't know what I would do... I fucking..."

I cut him off, "I know. I love you too. Unmistakable fact of life. I love you."

A knock at the door, "hey guys it's me." I got up and opened it to Milo's anxious face, "What's wrong, that's the emer.. Holy shit! is that yours" Milo stared in disbelief.

"Yes, it is, in the 48 hours I was gone I went and had a werewolf baby and now you're the designated sitter so we can go make another one" I was monotone in my sarcasm. I stepped out the door, "you coming Davey?"

David carefully slipped the baby into Milo's arms, "support the head and neck here," I heard him say. "Yeah, remember when we used to do this with Ginny's baby a few years back?"

He grabbed his jacket off the back of a chair and followed me "of course I'm coming you dumbass." He yelled down the hall at me, "Oh Milo, if he starts whimpering just shift and lay with him, he's docile. There's warm milk on the table and more in the fridge if he's crying. He didn't mind the couch but feel free to lay him on the bed"

"Let's go!" I yelled to David down the hallway.

"What the fuck is going on" was the last thing I heard Milo say before David shut the door.

South and Maple was a quiet intersection, although most are at the ungodly hour of 2am. Surrounded by three or four story buildings with alleyways and parked cars. There was no shortage of places to hide or spy down on the intersection. David and I stepped onto an alley between two buildings to discuss a plan. Unfortunately we didn't get the time.

"Where is he?"

We both turned to a tall lanky woman at the end of the alley. She was dressed in a pantsuit, real realtor vibes. Two men ran around the corner and took their place behind her. David growled but I put my hand out in front of him, "hold back" I whispered.

"Who are you and what do you want? Where are the parents?" I yelled down the alley.

"Where? Honey probably at the bottom of the the lake considering the rocks tied to their ankles"

David started growling again but I told him again to wait. This conversation was not violent yet.

"You stole that baby!" I accused

"Baby?" She laughed, "that was not a baby, what you have hidden somewhere is a freak circus animal that many are willing to pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for."

"You bitch!" I yelled

"I have bids lined up" the men besides her both shifted in werewolves which prompted David to do the same. The sudden magic and chaos of growling and barking filled the air. David was significantly larger than the other two but he was outnumbered. There was a mix of growling, barking, and biting. I was bewildered that I didn't even hear the shot. The lady whistled and both the other wolves ran to join her. They walked around the corner.

David shook himself off and ran to follow. Water fell down the side of my leg. Water? I looked up trying to find a leaking gutter or rain. No rain. I looked down and saw a red stain on the side of my shirt growing. I balled up a chunk of shirt and held it against my side.

"Davey'' my voice cracked. "Davey!" I couldn't get it to be as loud as I needed. My left ear started ringing loudly. My head was full of sawdust and my vision became the static of an old tv. I felt a hand over my own behind me. Fuck, Davey. Where did he come from?

"Can you ..." was all I heard before I felt my knees give out. David picked me up bridal style and ran to the end of the alleyway. I heard the car door open and the next thing I saw was the ceiling over the back seat. David climbed in the back with me and shut and locked the door.

"Just.. drive" fuck, talking hurt.

"Classic triage Angel, stabilize then transport." He tried to move my hand away from the wet spot I was holding.

"It doesn't hurt that bad! Just drive" I was using whatever I had left to keep him away.

"That's cause you're going into shock" he grabbed my denim jacket from the front seat, "hey, Angel look at me. I'm going to lift your hand up just for a second and put your jacket under it ok?"

I winced and nodded. It actually didn't hurt that bad. I couldn't feel anything and everything had a vague cold numbness. He drapped his leather jacket over my shoulders.

I took a deep and painful breath. I closed my eyes for a moment but then I felt David snapping his hand over my face. When did he get in the front seat? When did he start driving.

"Hey! Keep your eyes open"

"I'm fine, I'm ok. I just blinked"

"You're pale. Are you nauseous?" David put his eyes back on the road, "if we go back to the apartment they'll follow us and find the kid" he said, "but if we go to a human hospital they'll ask too many questions. So we're going to.. Hey Angel! Open your eyes and keep holding that jacket down. We're going to Milo's mother's place. She'll be ready for us. Angel! Are you listening to me? Asher and Milo have the baby. Christan is leading the pack to hunt down that woman."

I was barely making out the words. Davey was the alpha for a reason, that's the only thing I understood. Cool under pressure, rallying the troops, delegating orders. I nodded, at least I think I did. "I love you" were the words that I tried to get out of my mouth. I felt the engine of the car rev louder.

[nothingbutimagines]

Elizabeths (Chapter II)

Pairing: Bad boy!Peter Parker x Reader

Warning: Cursing, death, mentions of suicide

Summary: Y/n is part of her high school’s most powerful and most popular clique, but she disapproves of the other girls’ behavior. When Y/n meets the new boy in school, Peter Parker, and begins dating him, what she has known to be her clique begins to unravel. Starting with the death of the clique leader, Liz Allan, one by one, people Y/n doesn’t like begin to die by her and Peter’s hands. Soon, she realizes that Peter is killing students he hates and begins to try to foil his plans, all while clashing with the new clique leader, Elizabeth “Betty” Brant.

Author: Dizzy

A/N: This is a Peter Parker AU I thought of doing. It’s a Heathers AU!!! This is going to follow a similar plot to Heathers, but of course, I won’t keep everything the exact same. Here, we meet our protaganist, Y/n, and our love interest, JD Peter.

Masterlist Request Any Of These Peter Parker/Tom Holland Masterlist

__________________

Dear Diary,

I know I said I only fuck with the college boys and to hell with the high school ones, but goddamn, I can’t take my mind of off Peter Parker. Especially with him pulling that shit he did with the gun in the commons. 

“God, they won’t expel him. They’ll probably just suspend him for a week or something.” Lizzie insisted, clacking her croquet mallet against your own as you both chuckled. 

“He used a real gun.” Liz scoffed. “They should throw his ass in jail. Doesn’t he know today’s climate? Hasn’t he heard of Columbine?”

“No way.” You argued, leaning forward on your unused mallet as you watched Liz retie her ponytail with that red scrunchie you always hated. “He used blanks. All Peter did was ruined two pairs of pants... maybe not even that...” You and Lizzie began giggling. “I mean, can you bleach out urine stains?”

The sound of Liz knocking her mallet into the red ball and the red ball hitting Betty’s green one was a response enough. The sound was almost deafening as silence fell between you and Lizzie. 

“Ah, yes, Peter.” Liz finally spoke up, “You seem pretty amused. I thought you were over high school guys.” 

“Never say never.”

“What are you going to do, Liz? Take the two shots or knock me out?” Betty asked, her doe like eyes meeting Liz’s, making it clear she had not been paying attention to the conversation at hand. 

“Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?” Liz snapped. “First you ask if you can be red, knowing I am always red...”

You watched as Liz took a step forward, her foot firm on her red ball as she hit the mallet against it, the red ball sending Betty’s green into the flower bed, causing you to wince as Liz grunted triumphantly. 

Liz hit her ball again, this time falling short of the wicket as she groaned, rolling her eyes. Always too cocky too early, Liz.

“Damn.” She cursed. “Anyway, I can say never to high school boys. Especially when I have Steve.” 

“Ah, yes. King Steve.” Lizzie chuckled, taking her shot and getting the yellow ball through the wicket as she squealed. 

“Maybe when you get older and actually reach maturity, you’ll understand the difference between Columbia University man like Steve and a Midtown High boy like Brad “nut-and-bolt” Davis.” 

Lizzie shrugged. “I think Brad’s sweet. Your turn, Betty!” 

Betty pouted, a whine escaping her throat as she navigated getting into the flower bed, trying to avoid the peonies your mother had planted earlier in the week. 

“No pain, no gain!” Lizzie teased.

“Give it up, girl!” You added, both of you howling at Betty. 

You watched as Betty furrowed her brow, leaning down a bit as she hit the ball. You chuckled as it bounced off a tree and then hit the fountain in the yard before rolling perfectly through the wicket. 

“Holy shit!” You gasped, howling in laughter.

“That was incredible!” Lizzie squealed.

“What. A. Shot.” Liz added, shaking her head, a mixture of pride and jealousy in her smirk. 

You began setting up your shot as Lizzie spoke up, your attention half on her and the other half on getting the shot. 

“So, tonight’s the night. Are you two excited?” Lizzie asked, glancing between both you and Liz. 

“I’m giving Y/n her shot. Her first Columbia party. You blow it tonight, girl, and it’s keggers with kids all senior year.” 

You groaned, having missed your shot. As you dropped your mallet, bending down to pick it up, you rolled your eyes as Liz’s attitude. 

“Damn.” You cursed. “So, who’s this Bucky guy I’ve been set up with? Witty and urban pre-law or an idiot and savant art major?”

“Don’t worry.” Liz rolled her eyes. “Steve says he’s very. So he’s very.”

“I doubt it.” You muttered, knowing full well the only boy you wanted to be set up with is the bad boy wannabe from the commons. 

“Lizzie! Your mom is here!” Your mother called before Liz could open her mouth to say anything further. 

“Come on, whoever wants a ride!” Lizzie announced. “Bye, Y/n. Good luck.” 

“Yeah, good luck.” Betty agreed as she rushed past, following Lizzie and Liz up the stairs. 

You dropped your mallet and followed behind the girls, waving them off as they cut through the side of the house and off the property. You took a seat at the table on the patio as your father took a seat beside you, James Patterson book in hand as you mother joined you both, salsa and chips on the platter clutched in her fists. 

“So, what was the first week of Spring Break withdrawal like?” Your father asked, leaning past your slouching figure to grab a chip. 

“Hey, kid, isn’t the prom coming up?” Your mother asked before you could answer your father.

You shrugged with a smile. “I guess it is.”

“Any contestants worth mentioning?” 

“Maybe. I guess you could say there is a bit of a dark horse in the running.”

“Goddamn. Why do I even read these damn Patterson books. Bastard probably doesn’t even write them.” Your father chimed in, looking up at you.

“Because you’re an idiot.” You beamed, laughing alongside him for a moment. 

“Oh, yeah. That’s it.”

“You two...” Your mother smiled, shaking her head.

“Thanks for the salsa.” You rose from your seat. “But I gotta motor if I want to be ready for that party tonight.” 

Dear Diary,

When you fuck with the eagles, you gotta learn to fly. Columbia is Liz kicking my ass out of the nest, whether I like it or not. And to be honest, I don’t wanna fucking fly. 

You opened the car door, the cold night breeze chilling you to the bone as you slammed the door shut, wincing as you knew Liz would scold you for your improper behavior later. Tugging at the length of your sleeves, you walked towards the 7-11.

“Corn nuts!” Liz yelled, half her body out the car window as she yelled at you. 

Without looking back, you waved her off, tempted to just give her the middle finger and call it a night. 

You swung the door open, the warm draft greeting you as you made a beeline to the Corn Nuts, hoping to get in and get out and get this goddamn Columbia party over with. 

“You going to get a Big Gulp with that?” A voice erupted from behind you as you turned around, the bag of Corn Nuts you needed in hand. 

“No, but if you’re nice, I’ll let you buy me a Slurpee.” You teased, meeting Peter’s eyes, or rather, eye, as the other was covered by his falling bang. “You sure do know your 7-11 slang.” 

“I’ve moved around all my life; Baton Rouge, Vegas, Dallas, Suburbia. There’s always been a 7-11. The only stability. Any town, any time, I can pop a chicken sandwich in the microwave and feast on a tornado. Keeps me sane.” He explained, his hand shaking next to his head at the end of his speech. 

“Really?” You asked, “I don’t know, I mean, that thing you pulled today was pretty severe.”

“The extreme always makes an impression, but you’re right, it was pretty severe. Did you say a Coke or Cherry Slurpee?” 

“I didn’t.” You pulled a red vine from the open box at the counter. “Cherry.” 

You smiled, taking a bit out of the vine as you twirled it between your fingers, Peter matching your expression. You took the Slurpee from his hand and followed him to the counter, the silence between you comfortable as he paid for the snacks you collected and you followed him outside. 

You shivered in the cold air, the thought that getting a Slurpee was a good idea now turning in your mind. 

“Great bike.” You nodded to the motorcycle as Peter took a seat on it. 

Liz honked her horn, causing you to tear your gaze from Peter as she gave you an agitated look, only for you to return the gesture with a glare and turn back to Peter.

“Just a humble perk from my uncle’s construction company or should I say deconstruction company?” 

“I don’t know, should you?”

“My uncle seems to enjoy tearing things down more than building things up. Seen the commercial? ‘Bringing every State to a Higher State.’“

“Oh, shit.” You gasped, connecting the dots as you playfully hit Peter’s shoulder. “Peter Parker... Your uncle’s Big Ben Parker Construction. Must be rough, moving place to place.”

Peter shrugged. “Everybody’s got some static in their life. Is your life perfect?”

You scoffed. “Sure, I’m going to a Columbia University party.”

Liz honked the horn again, letting her hand rest on the horn for a little longer as you frowned.

“It’s not perfect.” Your tone was serious. “I don’t really like my friends.”

“I don’t really like your friends either.” Peter shook his head, a low chuckle escaping his lips. 

“It’s like they’re just people I work with and our job is being popular and shit.” 

“Maybe it’s time for a vacation.” 

Liz’s horn blared again as you waved at Peter, starting to walk away. “You’re telling me!”

Dear Diary,

The day I take a vacation, that’ll be the day Liz Allan is dead. Until then, I’m stuck doing my job being her popular lap dog and sucking her dick by telling her how hot and popular she is. 

You could barely suppress a look of disgust as you followed Liz and Steve through the crowded dormitory hallway and into Steve’s dorm. You hated Steve. Sleazy, sweaty, somewhat mediocre looking Steve. You could feel the clot of bile creep up your throat as Steve held the door open for you, the sick smell of cheap beer and sweat so pungent your eyes teared up. 

“You can just throw your coats down on the bed, girls.” Steve instructed as both you and Liz slipped off your coats and did as you were told. 

You watched as Steve walked away for a moment, you assumed to get Bucky as you looked at Liz, who was watching them as well, the doe like look in her eyes telling you that she was in love with him. That for some reason, the clever bitch fell for the disgusting college guy. 

“Y/n, this is Buck.” Steve introduced the other boy, his hand clasped on his shoulder as he guided him to you. 

“Excellent.” Bucky nodded, his eyes tracing over your form as you held back a frown. “Did you girls bring your partying boots?”

“Yeah, let’s party.” Liz smiled, jerking you to get you to do the same. 

Steve chuckled, throwing his arm around Liz as he looked at her. “What can I say? She loves to party.” 

Dear Diary, 

I want to kill and you have to believe... damn pen! 

“So, are you a cheerleader?” Bucky asked, his back against the tacky blue and grey striped wallpaper.

“Not at all.” You gagged, the smell of beer and cigarettes on his breath making you nauseous as you took a sip of the drink in your hand. 

“You’re pretty enough to be one.”

“Gee, thanks.” 

“It’s so great to be able to talk to a girl without having to ask ‘what’s your major?’ I hate that.” Bucky took a sip of his beer before continuing, “So, when you go to college, what do you think you’ll study?”

You have to believe it’s for more than selfish reasons. More than a spoke in my menstrual cycle. You have to believe me. 

Bucky had given up on conversation, you could tell by the way he shifted on his heels uncomfortably. It’s not like you minded, nor cared, since you debated finding Liz’s coat and stealing her car, leaving her in your dust. 

Goddamn Liz. Goddamn Columbia guys. Goddamn you for agreeing to be here.

“So, what do you say we go up to my dorm and have a real party? I’ve got the best rap mix in the whole dorm.” Bucky’s voice pulled you from your thoughts as another boy approached.

“Buck, man,” The boy jerked Bucky around by the shoulder, “Nick’s been looking for you. He says he owes you for blow and he just got some shit himself.”

“You’re kidding. Asshole really scored some of his own?”

“He’s in Nat’s room. Go, man. Party on.”

“Excellent.” Bucky finally turned to you, as if he forgot you were even there, “Y/n, you ever do coke?”

“Ever since writing that DARE essay in fifth grade, I refuse everything.” 

“DARE? Are you sure that shit still works?”

You smacked your forehead lightly. “Oh, geez, right! I wrote that at eleven. Might as well do drugs now since I’m not so stupid!” 

You groaned, pushing through the crowded hallway back to where you and Liz had thrown your coats. 

“Hey, don’t run off, now!” Bucky called out, following behind you closely.

Seventeen is the last year Mom buys the Twinkies. When you make the jump from working at Pizza Hut on the weekends to working thirty years at I.B.M, when you lose something, not innocence - power.

You swung open the door to the room, throwing yourself on the stack of coats on the couch beside the door. Setting your glass of vodka in your lap, you pulled out the matchbook you’d gotten at the 7-11. You struck a match, holding your hand over the flame, bringing it closer and closer until the red light licks your hand, causing you to shriek in pain. You dropped the match into the glass, shocked when it catches fire. Giggling to yourself, you toss the glass out the open window; out of sight, out of mind.

“There you are.” Bucky’s voice has you rolling your eyes as you turn to him. “How’s my little cheerleader? Now I know everyone at your high school isn’t so uptight, come on.” 

His hand was coated in sticky sweat as it touched your tight covered thigh and his breath was hot and warm as his leaned in too close to your face. 

“Hey, I really don’t feel so great.” You argued, shoving him away from you as you shot up off the couch. 

“Let’s do it on the coats.” He grinned, oblivious to your side of the conversation. “It’ll be excellent.”

“You know, I have a little prepared speech I give when my suitor wants more than I’d like to give him. Gee, Blank, I had a nice-”

“Save the speeches for Malcolm X. I just wanna get laid.” Bucky chuckled, cutting off your sentence before you could even get the bulk of it out. 

You yanked your coat out from under him, sending him sliding off the couch and to the floor.

“You don’t deserve my fucking speech.” You huffed, stepping over him and storming out the door.

You slow as you realized you now gained Liz’s attention, along with Steve’s as Bucky emerges from the “coat” room. You can tell by the falling smiles on both Steve’s and Liz’s faces as Bucky spews some words you can’t hear that they are more than pissed at you. You watch, your eyes widening as Liz slides her beer glass on the table beside her, steel-faced as she approaches you. 

“What’s your damage? Bucky says you’re being a real cooze.” Liz snapped.

“Liz, I feel awful, like I’m going to throw up. Can we jam, please?”

“Hell no.”

You couldn’t help it, the sudden clot in your throat was replaced with actual vomit as you leaned against the wall, rendered unable by your sudden fatigue to make it to the bathroom. You leaned over, vomit spilling onto the carpet and splatter hitting Liz’s red heels. Groaning, you charge down the hallway and out the door, determined to make it back to the car as Liz follows close behind. 

Christ, I can’t explain it, but I’m allowed an understanding that my parents and these Columbia University assholes have chosen to ignore. I must stop Liz.

“You stupid cunt!” Liz roared, the trash can fire casting shadows on her face as you shivered in the cool night air. 

“You goddamn bitch!” 

“You were nothing before you met me! You were playing Barbies with Cindy Moon! You were a Brownie, you were a Bluebird, you were a Girl Scout Cookie! I got you into a Columbia University party! What’s my thanks? It’s on the hallway carpet. I got paid in puke!” 

“Like it up, baby. Lick. It. Up.”

“Monday morning, you’re history. I’ll tell everyone about tonight. Transfer to Washington. Transfer to Jefferson. No one at Midtown is going to let you play their reindeer games.”

Cindy Moon was a real friend and I sold her out for a bunch of Swatchdogs and Diet Cokeheads. Killing Liz’d be like offing the Wicked Witch of the West. Or is it East? West! I sound like a fucking psycho. Tomorrow I’ll be kissing her aerobicized ass, but tonight, let me dream of a world without Liz. A world where I am free. 

You couldn’t help but fling your diary across the room, the satisfying thud from it hitting the wall beside your window soothing you as you wallowed in anger. You gasp as you hear a sound at the window, looking up, you tear off your glasses and make eye contact with one Peter Parker. 

“Dreadful etiquette, I apologize.” 

“It’s okay...” You replied breathlessly.

“I saw the croquet set out back, you up for a match?”

Your heart was still racing, however instead of the initial shock, it was now revving up with anxiety as you looked at the boy in your bedroom. Was he even really there? Or was he just an anger fueled hallucination?

“Sure. But I’m blue.”

Dear Diary,

When did my life become reminiscent of a YA novel? When did I come to believe it wasn’t weird that Peter Parker was coming through my window? Did Twilight finally condition me into believing odd behavior was true romance?

“Now I can see why you looked so mangled when I came up.” Peter shook his head, his voice soft. 

You shifted so that your head was on his bare chest, your eyes focused on the pile of his clothes that sat beside him. 

“I’ve always treated Liz’s drama queen plays as bullshit, but I’m honestly really scared. Who am I going to sit with at lunch on Monday?” You groaned, leaning back onto the grass, the blades pricking your bare shoulders. “God, I sound like I’m from Riverdale.” 

“Are girls really that bad?” 

“It’s a dog eat dog world.” You shrugged. “It feels like it’s either kill yourself or get told to kill yourself.”

“Geez.” Peter shook his head. “That was my first game of strip croquet, by the way. I thank you.”

“You’re welcome. It’s a lot more interesting than flinging your clothes off and going at it on a neighbor’s swing set.”

“Well, I don’t know, there’s something to be said for- ouch!” 

You chuckled as the blue mallet that was stuck in the ground fell over and hit the boy. He handed you your panties that fell along with the mallet before sliding on his own underwear. 

“What a night.” You giggled, slipping on your panties as you kissed him softly and stood up. “What a life. I almost moved into high school right out of sixth grade because I was some sort of genius. But of course, my mother was too scared I wouldn’t make friends, so we chucked the idea and blah, blah, blah.”

You searched the yard for your clothes, cursing Peter silently for allowing you to toss them around instead of into a neat pile like he had done. You picked up your shirt and pants, gathering up your socks and slippers before putting them on as you spoke.

“But now blah-blah-blah is all I ever do. I use my grand I.Q. to decide what shade of lip gloss to buy and how to hit three keggers before curfew. Some genius.” 

“Liz Allan is one bitch that deserves to die.” Peter blurted out, making it clear he wasn’t listening to you. 

“Killing her won’t solve anything.”

“A well time lighting bolt on her walk into school on Monday morning, all the other Elizabeths, shit, the whole school, would be cut loose.”

“Well, then, I will pray for rain.” You chuckled. “A flowerpot falling from the window sill would work just as well, more likely to happen too.”

“You see those condoms in the grass? We killed it tonight, Y/n. We killed our baby.” 

“Hey, it was good for me too, imbecile.”

“I’m just saying. It’s not hard to end a life.”

“There’s a big difference between killing the prom queen and busting into a condom.”

You both laugh as Peter finally starts getting dressed. 

“I guess I don’t know what I’m talking about. After all, there’s only one genius here.”

“I know exactly what the hell you’re talking about and you’re right, you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. Why don’t we just graduate, grow old and be adults, and then die?” 

“Sounds like a plan to me.”

“But before we do that, I want to see Liz Allan spew chunks so we can call it even.”

_____________________

Tagged: @thewinchesterchronicles @spookyanairwin @audreylovespidey706 @asonofpeter​ @halparkebitch​

message me to be added to the taglist!

[soybeantree]

pairing: kim junmyeon x reader

genre/warning: fluff, magic!au

word count: 5k+

description: apparently blowing off some steam - one too many times - leads to a one way ticket to servantdom. at least that’s how you viewed the newest link in the perverbial chain called ‘eventual obligations of being a familiar’. turns out it actually doesn’t matter how much you argue the rightness of your life choices to the higher ups. and turns out you don’t mind being attached to a certain kim junmyeon all that much either.

a/n: from the ‘rosemary by moonlight’ universe. not necessary to read that first, but some things may not make complete sense. we’ve been working on fleshing out this universe, so there will be more to come very soon!

The assignment sheet mocks you, promising the end of your freedom. You ball up the paper and throw it in the nearest trash bin. It doesn’t matter though, the damn sheet will show up on your bedside table tomorrow. Once signed a contract is unbreakable. It’s only six months though. You continue to remind yourself as irritation crawls across your skin.

Shoving your hands into your pocket, you head towards the exit but pause when you catch sight of a familiar figure. “Yuri!” You call. The healer turns. Her brows furrow when she sees your raised hand. She returns the wave and stops as you jog up to her. “What are you doing here?” 

“City Council business.” She gestures to the hall she came down. The doors at the end lead to the City Council Chambers.”

“But you’re not on the City Council.

“Only because it’s full of bigoted assholes.” She scoffs as she resumes walking. You fall into step beside her.

“Doesn’t your family head the City Council and make up about half of it?”

“Doesn’t mean their not bigoted assholes. Anyways, what are you doing here?” She reaches for the exit door and holds it open for you. 

The sun glares down at you, causing your eyes to transform. Cat eyes are easier to adjust to the bright light which outweighs the con of seeing everything in black and white. “I was picking up an assignment.”

“What?!” Your shoulders hunch, and you hiss. Yuri laughs and slaps you on the shoulder as she comes up beside you. “Don’t get your whiskers in a twist. I just never thought the day would come when Y/N would tie herself down to a sorcerer.”

“It’s not voluntary.” Your mumbling quirks Yuri’s brow. “I may have started a riot with my neighborhood cats,” you explain, quickly adding, “but I had good reason. This dick wad kid at the end of my street keeps shooting at strays with his pellet gun. I reported him to the neighborhood watch, but they did jack shit. So I took it upon myself to right the wrong.” Yuri nods along approvingly as you head down the steps in front of Town Hall, and you smile. If she or Uko were on the Board of Familiars, your hearing would have gone in your favor. 

“Long story short, the dick wad’s father brought charges against me, and the Board of Familiars thought my rebellious behavior is due to a lack of an authority figure in my life and that I have gone too long without a master. After all, what is a familiar without a master?” You roll your eyes and scoff.

“That’s ridiculous, so you had to sign your entire life away?”

You shake your head as you reach the sidewalk and head toward the nearby bus stop. “Familiar Law may be traditional, but it’s not barbaric. I signed a six month contract, and I’ll have an evaluation at the end. If I’m good, they’ll let me decide when and who my next master is.”

“They chose your master?” You nod. “Who?” She asks as the bus pulls up to the stop. The one question, you had hoped to avoid. You use the excuse of boarding the bus to delay your response, but all too soon, you two are sitting. She stares at you waiting for an answer. 

“Jun- Suho.” You correct yourself. “Why do sorcerers have to take a new name when they gain the title? It’s so stupid. He was Junmyeon all through school, and now that he has the fancy title of Sorcerer, I have to call him Suho.” You blabber on, avoiding her gaze. “It’s not like there are a lot of options in the area.” You huff.

“I know.” Yuri sighs, and you chance a glance at her. She’s staring out the window. You nudge her, but she waves you off. It’s not her fault that her family has only produced one sorcerer in the past two generations, but that argument has grown tiresome.

A mischievous grins tugs at your lips, and you settle into your seat. “Yep, so it was either Suho or Kyungsoo – whatever his sorcerer name is – and I didn’t think you’d like me being his familiar.”

Yuri whips around. “It’s D.O, and why would I care if you were his familiar?” You shrug but continue to grin. She glares, and you crack up. “Are you going to meet up with Suho now? He was at the Town Council meeting.”

“Fuck no. The contract doesn’t start till tomorrow, and I plan to enjoy my last night of freedom. Do you want to join me?” You cock a brow, but she shakes her head.

“Can’t. Chanyeol’s in town, and I promised him I would help him with something. Stop by my house in the morning though if you need a hangover remedy.” She offers as she presses the button for her stop.

“You’re the best.” After a quick grin, she is off, leaving you to your night of revelry.

The revelry should have stopped at 11:59. After all, come midnight, your six months of servitude began, but you had to push your boundaries, had to stay out till dawn drinking and dancing. 

Standing in front of Junmyeon’s townhouse after two hours of sleep and with a stomach threatening to unleash everything you imbibed during the last twelve hours, you question your life choices. With a shrug, you step forward and hammer the door. 

Nothing. No creak as the door swings open on rusty hinges and no smoke billowing from an empty corridor. No faint wail of departed spirits welcoming you to a place of death and despair. You definitely have suggestions for your sorcerer, and with Halloween around the corner, they are desperately needed.

Raising your fist again, you pound out the opening to Beethoven’s 5th symphony. Before you make it too far into the song, the door swings open soundlessly to reveal a sleep disheveled Junmyeon in purple silk pajamas with a matching silk robe. 

“I expected the robe. The pajamas not so much.” You comment as you lower your sunglasses to allow a full examination.

With a huff, Junmyeon jerks his robe closed. “What are you doing here, Kitty?”

Your lips pull back as you hiss at the nickname. Middle schoolers think they’re so clever. But the stupid nickname has stuck with you through high school and beyond. Shoving past Junmyeon, you enter the house. He blusters behind you, but you hear the door click shut soon after. 

“Didn’t you hear?” You ask as you glance around the impeccably groomed foyer. Every vase, frame, and piece of furniture glistens with a fresh coat of polish. “Do you clean all of this yourself or do you have a spell for that?” You turn back to face him, pulling your shades off and tucking them into the top you’d pulled out of your laundry basket that morning. It was the clean laundry basket, but it has been sitting on your bedroom floor for upwards of two weeks.

“Hear what?”

“I’m your Familiar.” You sweep your arms out and pop a hip as you dazzle him with your million-watt smile. 

He stares at you, mouth parted and chest still, for entirely too long. As a Familiar your magic extends beyond the ability to shift and a photographic memory, but not to immobilizing sorcerers. 

“Would you stop being a dick and say something? Listen, I’m not happy about this either. I’m even less happy that the stupid Board of Familiars didn’t give you a heads-up even though this was their brilliant idea. But here I am and here you are, and we’re stuck together for the next six months. We should just be happy that they didn’t insist that I live with you. 

“Now, do you have any ginger tea? My stomach is all kinds of upset, and I didn’t have time to stop by Yuri’s and get her hangover remedy.” You about-face and head towards where you think the kitchen is.

“Other way.”

You about-face again and head in the other direction. The kitchen is as disgusting as the foyer. He has everything in glass jars with labels, but none of them have ginger tea written on them.

“In the cabinet to the right of the microwave.” He directs you as he takes a seat at the counter. 

You swivel the Lazy Susan until you find the jar of ginger tea. “Mugs? Tea kettle?” 

He stands and stomps over to another cabinet to grab a mug. Filling it from the sink, he hands it to you, steam rising above the rim. You cock a brow. He returns the gesture, and you snort grabbing the mug and dropping a tea bag in it. “Look at you warming water without a spell. You really are a sorcerer, aren’t you?” You tease as you wait for your tea to steep.

“I didn’t ask for a Familiar, and I don’t need one.”

“And I didn’t ask for a sorcerer, and I don’t want one. But yet again, here we are?”

“Six months?” You nod. “And you signed a contract?” You nod again. “I didn’t sign.”

“Apparently a request was made by the head of your family. No signature needed when it’s stamped with the family crest.”

Junmyeon sighs, running a hand through his already disheveled hair. “Why is my grandfather like this?”

“We’d all like to know that.” You blow on the tea before taking a tentative sip. The warmth slips through your body easing through your stomach and bringing it to rest. “Did Minseok make this tea blend?” You ask as you take another sip. 

He shakes his head, his cheeks tinging pink. “No, he only works with coffee.”

“You got this from Yuri, didn’t you? How did you swing that?”

“If we are going to be working together for the next six months, we need to set some ground rules.” He sneaks by your question, and you let him because you agree. “Let me shower and change, and then we can go over them.” You nod, sipping at your tea. He starts to walk off but stops and swivels back to face you. “Don’t touch anything.” You roll your eyes, and he narrows his.

“Calm down, Mr. Sensitive. Sorcerers aren’t the only ones who know about the delicate nature of magic.” His lips purse, but whatever retort he has remains unspoken. He walks off, and you shake your head. This is going to be a long six months. 

Strolling out of the kitchen, you follow the scent of magic up to the second story of the townhouse. The door to Junmyeon’s work room is locked, but what good of a Familiar would you be if that stopped you. The door pops open, and the scent of magic overwhelms you. Sneezing, you glance around. The large still at the end draws your attention. Witches simply brew their potions in a cauldron, but sorcerers have to be pretentious and make it seem like their work is more advanced and complicated. 

Passing in front of a mirror, you pause and raise a brow. Surely, Junmyeon knows the mirror is an open dimension portal. Why he would have an open dimension portal is beyond you, but he must have a reason. You stand in front of the mirror, chewing on the inside of your lip. He said not to touch anything, and you had given your word. However, you would be a shitty Familiar if you left the portal open. 

Eyes closed, you breathe in and out, feeling your magic hum through your hair and all the way to your toes. Your bones reform themselves, and your skin shrinks itself as fur sprouts across it. When you open your eyes, the world appears in shades of grey, except for the creatures on the other side of the mirror. They glow a sinister black. Raising a paw, you rest the pads against the cool glass. It ripples at your touch. The creatures stir, and you hiss at them to stay back. Your claws are good for more than catching mice. 

Magic surges through you, and you purr at the sensation. Releasing the magic, you watch as it coats the mirror’s glass. The rippling surface stills, and when you stare at it, only your reflection stares back.

“What are you doing?” Junmyeon’s scream grates on your ears, and you hiss at him. “I told you not to touch anything.”

And I wouldn’t if you weren’t stupid enough to leave an open portal in your work room. Who knows what shit those creatures would have caused in here. Your words are unspoken. They call upon your magic to reach him, and judging by his frown, they did.

“The portal wasn’t open.”

You cough, your throat unable to snort. Wow. Now I understand why your grandfather requested a Familiar for you. 

He bristles, his shoulders rolling back as he draws himself up to his full height which is considerable from where you sit on the floor. “I was doing quite well without one. I am close to a breakthrough on my research, and I will not have you causing me any delays.”

Delays? I’ve been here for less than an hour, and I’ve already saved your research. 

“Will you become human, please? We have a lot to discuss.”

You shrug, and by the time your shoulders settle into place, you are human again. “Better?”

With a nod, he heads to his work table and sits down on one of the stools, indicating you should take the other. 

Stretching, you ease the tightness which always comes from transformation and do as requested. Junmyeon starts talking, but the burbling beakers behind him capture your attention. One’s color shifts from bright blue to dark purple as you watch. Above it, a valve releases a droplet of water in ten seconds intervals. The liquid continues to darken with each drop. 

“I have a feeling that you don’t want that turning black.” You cut Junmyeon off as you point to the beaker. 

He glances over his shoulder and nearly falls off his stool as he rushes to remove the beaker from under the valve. He curses and mutters low to himself as he sloshes the liquid around. A light traces the surface of the glass before disappearing. Junmyeon sets the beaker on the table and scratches the back of his head. His eyes focus on a shaft of light coming through one of the work rooms' high windows. He continues to mutter, and you stand, moving closer to him to catch the vein of his thoughts. But, he senses your presence and steps back, glowering at you.

“What are you doing?” 

“I’m your Familiar. I’m supposed to help you with your magical problems, but I can’t do that if I don’t know what they are.”

“We have not established the rules of our relationship, and I don’t need your help.” He places his hand on the beakers top, muttering a spell. The liquid disappears, and he picks up the empty vessel, carrying it over to a previously unnoticed cauldron. You smile to yourself. Maybe, he’s not as pretentious as you thought. Returning with a bright green liquid circling the base of the beaker, he sets it under the valve and adjusts its speed, increasing the time between drips. 

“What are you working on?” You ask and quickly add. “I’m your Familiar. I should know.”

“We are setting up our ground rules.” He retakes his stool and you plop into yours, propping your head against your palm. The tea calmed your stomach, but using magic while hungover and exhausted is brewing a nasty headache. 

“Fine. Can we make it quick though? I need a nap.” 

“First, you are not to enter my home if I am not present.”

You nod. The movement sends a stab of pain through your head. “Going forward. If I don’t say anything, I agree. Also, even though my eyes are close, I am still listening.”

“Why did you go so hard last night?”

You grunt in response. “Consider it my ‘bachelorette party’. Gotta party hard before-“ You stop when you feel cool finger tips against your temple. Cracking an eye open, you still. Junmyeon’s face is a breath from yours. His eyes, warm as a sunrise, focus on you. His lips, soft and supple, part. His words are a whisper, but your mind fails to process anything he says. Magic flows from his fingertips. The ache in your head eases. 

He steps back, his eyes still upon you. “How does that feel?”

You stare at him, both eyes wide open, and your mouth silent. Your brain has forgotten what words are and how speaking works. 

“Y/N?”

“Better.” The response is a guttural growl. You clear your throat and repeat in your regular voice. 

“Given the current circumstance,” he says as he reclaims his seat. “The second rule is do not show up to my house drunk or hungover.” You nod. “Three, do not touch anything without my permission.” You roll your eyes but motion for him to continue. “Four, do not give advice unless I ask for it.”

“Yeah, that’s not possible.” You smirk at him. “I’m a Familiar. My job is to give unsolicited advice. Like you should try a different type of water to purify that potion.” You point back to the beaker which is once again on its way to black. 

Junmyeon’s head falls back as he groans. Your attention catches on the strong column of his throat. You shake the image out your head. Your close encounter has addled your brain. Junmyeon is an Essem, and you shouldn’t be staring at any part of him.

“I don’t understand.” He growls, and you refocus on the darkening potion. “This water was charged during the full moon and distilled by my cousin. It should work.” He grabs the beaker, vanishing the contents once again. This time though he does not refill it. Instead, he sets it down and pulls a leather journal from a shelf above his work bench. 

“Charged during one full moon or many?” He glances up from his notes, a question in his glance. You sigh. “Water charged during one full moon is fine for scrying, but if you’re trying to purify a potion and make it stronger that shit isn’t gonna work. You need stronger water. What’s the potion and what do you want to accomplish?”

His finger taps against the journal, and his whole face scrunches up. 

With a huff, you stand up and walk towards him. He pulls the book to his chest before you can catch a glimpse of anything. “Really? What do you think I’m going to do? Run off to the Stahns and tell them what you’re working on? They don’t use spies.” You pause, allowing the weighted silence to convey what you are leaving unsaid. “And even if they did. I wouldn’t spy for them. Despite how much I fucking hate the Familiar institution, I do uphold our value of loyalty.”

He lowers his arms. You snatch the journal from him. He makes a noise, but you ignore him as you flip through the pages allowing your magic to commit it all to memory. “Do you really think you can make an invisibility potion last longer?”

“Yes, I think that by purifying a potion, you can increase both potency and longevity. I’m trying to establish the process with an invisibility potion and then expand to other potions.” His shoulders go back and his chest puffs up as he speaks, but his voice quavers revealing a glimpse through the peacocks feathers.

You nod, turning a page. “Why potions? I always thought sorcerers were more interested in spells and rituals.”

“Spells and rituals are fun.” His chest deflates as he rearranges the equipment on his desk. “And you get a lot more prestige from accomplishments with them, but they aren’t that useful for everyday life and people.”

You pause on a page, the scribbles already committed to memory. Junmyeon has the fancy script of a sorcerer, but perhaps not the motivation. “But a long lasting invisibility potion is?” You smirk as you snap the journal closed and hold it out to him. “I feel like that’s only useful for pervy teens and maybe thieves. Which is your market?”

“Neither.” He snatches the book from your hand. “It’s a basic potion, an easy starting point. I don’t intend to hand it out to anybody who asks.”

You shrug but continue to smirk. “Any more rules?”

He shakes his head. “But I reserve the right to additional ones as I see fit.”

“I reserve the right to argue them. I accept the first three, but not the fourth.” You hold out your hand, allowing your magic to fill it. After a moment’s hesitation, he grasps it. His magic meets yours, sealing the agreement. “Alright, now that’s settled, I’ll let you get back to work while I try to figure out your water problem.” He sputters out a response which you ignore as you head out of the room. 

Three weeks in the Essem library leaves you more frustrated than the day you were forced to sign your damn contract. Getting access to the library had been bitch enough. Grandpa Essem had been adamant that no outsider should have access to their family’s knowledge and especially not someone with a photographic memory. When you pointed out to him that he was the one who had registered Junmyeon for a familiar, he had blustered insensible nonsense which you had tuned out. In the end, it took Junmyeon and Kyungsoo vouching for you and a gag spell before he allowed you access.

Not that the library has been any help. The Essem’s have plenty of books about enchantments, spells, rituals, charms, and all other forms of high magic, but something as simple as supercharging water no. Aside from spending the next three years charging the same water during each full moon, you are at a loss, and that would not be practical for Junmyeon’s purposes. 

“You wouldn’t happen to know any aquamentals would you?” You ask Yuri as you spin in her swivel chair. 

“No. You know how rare elemental magic is.” She glances between her notebook and the ritual she has set up on the table. A bowl sits in the middle. She said it was a salve for wounds which would help knit flesh back together if she could empower it properly.

“Yeah.” You sigh, giving yourself another push.

“You’re going to make yourself sick.”

“Well, then it’s a good thing I’m with a healer.” She ignores your comment. “You work with charged water don’t you.”

“I’m not offering any advice that will be used to help an Essem.”

You scowl. “Don’t think of it as helping an Essem. Think of it as helping one of your oldest friends.”

“Who is working with an Essem.”

“Don’t you owe Kyungsoo for something.”

Her hands ball into fists. “Junmyeon is not Kyungsoo.”

“What if I convince Kyungsoo that this counts?” 

“No.” She snaps her notebook closed, ending the conversation.  She closes her eyes and draws upon her magic. You can smell it in the air, a hint of herbs and growing things. Sweat breaks across her forehead, but even with all her effort, it is only a hum compared to the current of Junmyeon’s magic. She places her hands on the table. For a moment, the ritual hums. You hold your breath. The magic fizzles, sputters, and explodes. The contents of the bowl covering the table, Yuri, the ceiling. You manage to stay clear of the blast zone.

Yuri unleashes a string of curses and nearly flips the table before collapsing back in her chair and banging her head on the table. “This should not be so hard.” She moans.

 As you fumble for something to say, the workshop door opens. “Uko.” You breathe a sigh of relief. She has always been better at cheering Yuri up. She also believes that magical knowledge should be accessible by all. “Really quick before you help Yuri, what’s the best way to charge water? And don’t say moonlight because I’ve tried that and it’s not powerful enough.”

“Which crystals have you used?” She asks as the door closes behind her.

“Doesn’t matter. None of them could give the water a high enough charge.” You wheel towards her, grabbing onto her hand and peering up at her with the softest kitty eyes you can muster. “Please you’ve read so much.”

“You know you look creepy not cute when you only transform your eyes.” She taps your forehead before walking to Yuri. She brushes against you, swiveling you to face them both. Yuri is continuing to bang her head. 

“Stop it.” She commands. Yuri drops her head with a final thud.

“You still haven’t answered my question.” You whine.

Uko shakes her head as she glances between the two of you. “If crystal and moonlight isn’t enough then you would have to steep it with an object of pure magic.” 

“Where the fuc-” But your brain answers the question before you can finish. You’re an idiot. A straight idiot. “Thank you, Uko. You’re the best.” You jump out of the chair and wrap the girl in a quick hug. “Also, Yuri, I’m pretty certain Kyungsoo would help you with your ritual if you asked.” She lunges at you, but you dart out of her reach, laughing as you head for the door. 

A week later, you skip into Junmyeon’s workroom, positively purring. If your idea was successful which you know it will be, you will see the results today. As you cross the door’s threshold, your footsteps falter. Junmyeon stands at his work table with his back towards you. Red tinges his magic, leaving the taste of sulfur on your tongue. “Suho?”

“Kitten,” the word is a low growl. Not Kitty, Kitten. Anger or, perhaps, fear should explain the surge of blood through your system, but it takes second place. An unwanted and unwarranted emotion causes warmth to travel from cheeks to toes. You have been spending way too much time with Junmyeon. 

“I have a name.” You spit back, calling on your anger.

Junmyeon’s hands clench on his work table. “Where did you get the water?”

Fear rises and mingles with your anger. Neither produces an answer though. The words remain locked within your throat. 

As he turns to face you fear overwhelms every emotion. You had misinterpreted the red. Rather than anger; fear has mixed with his magic. Fear for you if the Council finds out? Fear for himself. Regardless, his fear frightens you. “From the Lake.” He knows which lake. He knew before he asked. 

“Why?” His voice breaks on the question and brings your head low.

“We were out of options.” You whisper. “There are no spells for charging water, we don’t know any aquamentals, and relying on the full moon would have taken too long. The Lake has been steeping for centuries.”

“Steeping dark magic.”

You scoff at that. “Magic is neither dark nor light. It’s magic. We are dark and light and use magic to suit our purposes.”

He presses his lips together until they are a thin line across his face. You swallow the rest of your argument. In the current conversation, it is irrelevant. Junmyeon knows it too.

“It is forbidden to go to the Lake or take its water.”

“Only because the Council is full of bigoted assholes.” You borrow Yuri’s description. “Just because they think they know everything doesn’t mean they do. The spells placed on the Lake are older and more powerful than anything the sorcerers of today can conjure. The Stahns may be diminished in power now, but they were at the height of their power when they sealed away the Paen’s sorceress. Taking a beaker of water isn’t going to do anything to those spells. Short of draining the lake of all its water, I don’t think there is anything we could do today to affect those spells.”

“Regardless, it is the law, and you broke it.” His fist pounds on the table behind him, shaking the still. The invisibility potion, clear with only a hint of green, ripples beside his fist.

“Are you-“ The question sticks in your throat like a hairball. You cough. “Then be a good little Essem and turn me in.” You call on the remnants of your anger and force the fear out.

“No.” Your eyes snap to his. You were ready for the Council to come storming in and bind your magic for the rest of your life.

“No?”

“No.” He leans against the table and folds his arms across his chest. “I should because that was stupid and reckless.” He sighs and shakes his head. “But you are my Familiar. You acted to help me. More importantly though.” He holds your gaze, offering a glimpse of the deepest depths of his soul. “You are my friend, and I trust you.” 

You run your tongue across your lips, suddenly parched. Friend? You have known Junmyeon since kindergarten. You have been his line buddy, his teammate, his lab partner, but he has always been an Essem. A bigoted asshole and the enemy. You nod. 

“Thank you, friend.” You smile at the odd taste of the word. He returns the smile. “Do we go back to work now?”

“I’m adding another rule.” Pushing himself off the bench, he comes to stand before you and extends a hand. “Please consult me before you break any laws.” With a chuckle, you reach for his hand, but pull back and cock a brow. His face furrows as you tuck your hand behind your back. 

“Before I agree I have a rule of my own.” He sighs and crosses his arms, nodding for you to continue. “Don’t call me Kitten again unless you mean it.”

“What do you mean ‘mean it’?”

“You’ll know what I mean if you mean it.” You purr. 

A flush creeps up his neck, but he clears his throat and shakes it off. “Fine.” He offers his hand again. This time, you take it and let your joined magic rush through you. 

[psychicglitterdetective]

I am so damn angry

(Rant alert, so if you're not interested, just skip this post)

Alright, I'm so pissed about all the shit I've been going through the last few years of my life. (I'm currently 15 almost 16 rn)

It all happened with my dad. To put it in short, he emotionally manipulated me eversince I was a little kid. In context, I've been living with my grandparents for as long as I can remember due to my dad nor mom having stable jobs and my grandparents (mom's side) were generous enough to let us live with them for this many years.

I was extremely close to my grandfather, he would actually act like a dad then how my own father was. My dad was, to put it in short, a deadbeat. He would always lock himself in our room and just watch TV, if he isn't working. He would always tell me that my grandparents (more especially my grandfather) were bad people and to not get close to them. He also manipulated my mom from visiting her own family (sisters, brothers, etc.) So, we were basically closed off from them all.

Growing up, he was extremely overprotective over me. He wouldn't let me have guy friends, so I would just lie that I didn't have them when I did. I was extremely passionate in ice skating, it would of helped me be more in shape and I would do something other than being locked all day In my house. But he didn't let me, due to the outfits being "skimpy" and "would attract too much male attention" EVEN THOUGH I was fucking 7-9 years old when I took interest in it, I didn't even know how babies were made, and I wasn't even interested in "attracting" boys.

In my early adolescents, I started to get a bit into more "girly stuff" aka make up. I wanted to learn to wear make up to make myself feel pretty. And my mom was all for it. But my dad yelled at my mom, "She's not allowed to wear that shit until she's 18." Most of the girl's from middle, already knew how to wear makeup, and I didn't know Jack shit, I felt extremely left out.

And then, one day, it all came crashing down. It was a seemingly a normal day for me. It was after school, (when I was maybe 11 or 12) me and my mom walked into the house when we heard my grandfather talking to my grandmother. I can't remember especially what he said, but he said something about kicking my dad out.

My mom immediately went to her room, grabbed a suitcase. Practically shoved all of our stuff into it, grabbed my wrist and dragged me out of the house.

I should of probably mentioned this before, but my mom was pregnant with my brother at the time and, by command of my father, hid it from my grandparents.

The two must of heard my mom slamming the door and my grandma almost immediately called my mom and asked her what happened. My mom basically dropped an atomic bomb on my grandma and told her that she was pregnant and hung up on her.

After that, we would be homeless for the next couple of months. We would sleep in the car and jump from hotels and motels depending on how much money we would have on us. We would also stay with friends until my brother would be born.

At this point my brother was born. One day, someone offered my dad a job in Florida. He quickly accepted and we would have a road trip to Florida. At first I was enthusiastic, I wanted to think that this would help us have a house and have actual food.

But then, when we got there. The man said that would get us a job wasn't even in Florida, but was in another state where there has been a lot of snowing. So, we basically stayed in a rest spot for maybe a month.

At this point, I haven't been in school for five months. For some people, it would be a blessing. But for me it was a nightmare. It was extremely boring and I had nothing to do. I was, once again, locked in a small space.

My dad was a addicted to smoke. And people with addiction know if if you can't have the thing that you are addicted to, you'd get angry and would do anything thing to get it.

One day in that nightmarish month, my brother was crying because of not eating all day. My mom couldn't lactate and we haven't had money to buy him any milk. So, of course he would be cranky. My dad didn't have any cigarettes that day, and then he yelled at me and my mom the scariest thing that still echoes through my mind to this day.

"Quiet that thing up before I kill it."

For me, an eleven year old to hear those words come out of his mouth, I officially become scared of my father. I didn't cry, because I was scared that my father would kill me.. My mom was scared and immediately picked up my brother, and pulled him as far away as she could from my father. My dad immediately left the car when I broke down.

None of us would talk to each other for a while.

The two then got a job in a hotel. That was the time when I was forced to grow up. My parents had night shifts. So I would stay up all night so that I would take care of my brother. I was basically a second mother to my brother. I would be the one to feed him, dress him, bathe him, play with him. I had to grow up faster than most so that I could take care of him.

My parents were rarely there in those times. I tried to stay positive, and tried not to complain. But how could I tell my parents I didn't want to take care of my brother, even though they couldn't be there so that they could get money. I just couldn't.

It was because of this that it's extremely hard for me to even be clear with my emotions towards people. I would always bottle it all up, and try to not let it show. Yet, I'm naturally a very emotional person so it's extremely hard on me on a daily basis.

I had grown used to changing my brother. To others it would be disgusting, yet for me, it was nothing due to how many times I had changed him that I didn't bat an eye when changing him. My dad, when he would be on break, would force me to change him if he pooped. it disgusted him, I had to do it and I was barely getting into puberty.

I had nothing to do, other than taking care of my brother. I had no friends, I did have a phone, which is where I got my passion on writing. I had finally found something I was truly passionate that no one could take away from me. I would write fanfiction about creepypasta when ever I had the time.

(Which is extremely cringy looking back at it, but it came from a time that I needed something to entertain myself so I kind of look at them in pride.)

To get specific of how we lived. We were cramped in a small generic hotel room. We lived across a Walmart, so we would walk over and get microwaved food so we would have something to eat. We would only eat once a day so that my brother would have more to eat. So, there would be days were I wouldn't eat. I had gone on not eating for maybe 2 almost 3 days. I know what starving feels like.

I can't remember when, but our car got taken away due to not paying for it. The owners were threatening on kicking us out for basically the same thing. So, we were forced to call our grandparents so that we wouldn't be homeless without a car.

During this whole time, my father was putting ideas into my head about how it was their fault that we were homeless for a year.

When they finally came, i didn't talk. I was in a position of being extremely touch starved but didn't want any physical contact with anyone. My grandfather tried to talk to me, but I still couldn't talk. It was like I was forcing myself in not talking.

A few days after, we finally came back to my hometown. They did everything to help me feel back at home. They would take care of my brother so that I wouldn't worry, and even got me back in school.

Everything was looking up. Another thing I should of mentioned is that my parents started to fight a few weeks before going back in my hometown. It would sometimes go from a small disagreement to a full blown yelling contest.

I would always lock myself and my brother in the bathroom and tried to distract my brother by playing with him.

When we got in my hometown, the fights seemed to have gotten worse. I could get a full blown panic attack when ever people would yell at me. I would shut down until was alone in my room when I would start to cry and curl into a ball.

One day, my mom decided that it was enough for her, and decided to leave him. He began to cry, begged on his knees to my mom to let him stay. But she refused. He asked my grandfather if he could atleast sleep in the car in our parking yard but he refused. He came into my room and told me that my mom didn't want him anymore.

In some ways, I knew this was happening. My mom told me, and it gave me trust issues. Mostly towards men and love in general.

I was struggling with sexuality at the time. I was interested in guys romantically, but then I started to get into girl's as well. I come from a strict Christian family, (and I am a proud Christian as well) but most of my family, apart from my cousins, were some what against the lgbtq+. Like, they supported the people who were outside of the family. If it's outside of the family, they would be fine. So I was scared of coming out as bi-curious.

I told me mom one day, in a care ride but she told me that the moment I started to date, that I can't be bi. Even though you don't have to date to know that your sexually interested in the opposite gender.

This is already a long post, I'm sorry. I just wanted to get this out of my chest. I want to get therapy but like I said I'm very closed off with my emotions and my mom wouldn't believe me. I already made a post about my room situation.

Again, I'm sorry for this lengthy post. I just wanted to get this off of my chest, and no one that knows me personally is here so I don't have to worry.

If anything wants to ask for anything, feel free as long as it's not too personal (than it already is lol)

[draconida]

Shance Fic Recs

Well, while I was in my AO3 profile, I realized how many bookmarks I have! So I've decided to make fic recommendation lists.   [This list will have other parts, and I include fics with Kuro and Sven]

1- Black to Blue by PuppetMaster55

Lance, the undisputed (no longer, since he finally got the team to stop questioning his position like a month ago) leader of Voltron finds himself in the absolute strangest scenario: being the Blue Paladin.

Lance, still finding his place on team Voltron, wakes up to the weirdest world: one where he's the Black Paladin.

OR, I take a universe where Lance was always the Black Paladin and have him swap bodies with canon Lance, throwing both sets of teams for a trip.

[This fic is the beginning of a series in process, super recommended]

2- Black & Blue by starboyshiro (this author writes a lot of love to Shiro)

“Something wrong, babe? Did you have a bad day or something?” Shiro asks, plopping down on the couch next to Lance.

“Nothing happened, I'm just looking at all of these cute cats thinking about how much I want one, but can't have one.” Lance frowns, resting his head on Shiro's shoulder as he continues to scroll through Instagram.

Shiro can't stand to see his boyfriend upset. That's been a proven fact since Day One of their relationship. It's only natural that when Lance mentions his disappointment at never owning a cat, Shiro goes above and beyond to cheer him up…

3- I Fold by starboyshiro [Explicit]

“Do you even know who I am?”

“Am I supposed to?”

“Most people around here do.”

An intense poker game turns into a rather steamy night. Can this scrawny grad student handle the force of the famous journalist Takashi Shirogane?

4- Is That A Bowl Of Popcorn In Your Lap Or Are You Just Happy To See Me? by munchiesafterdark [Explicit]

“How many bags should I do?” Shiro called, waving the four unopened packs in his hand at Lance questioningly.

“I think two should be fine,” Lance shrugged. “We can always pop more if… we…” He trailed off, train of thought vacating the station as Shiro turned his back to him to put the remaining packs of popcorn into the cabinets. His hips swayed to an unheard rhythm, defined muscles flexing as he reached up and slid the popcorn into place on the top shelf. Lance’s eyes trailed down to the V of his back, the sweats hanging low enough for him to spot the curve of his round ass. Yet another anomaly of those pants was the manner in which they accentuated his bottom while still remaining baggy around his legs.

The obnoxious ding of the microwave nearly startled Lance out of his skin. His shift on the couch must have been audible, Shiro raised a brow at him over his shoulder, a cocky smirk crossing his lips as he leaned over to retrieve the finished bag of popcorn.

Fuck, he was toying with him! Well, two could play that game!

5- Nasty Smoothie by strawberrylovely

Lance works in a smoothie shop. Twice a week, a certain customer comes in and orders a nasty smoothie. Lance is head over heels.

6- A Hit and A Miss (tletoe) by strawberrylovely

Basically, Lance goes to a party with Hunk and blows his friend a kiss. However, he wasn’t expecting the cute stranger standing in front of Hunk to think the kiss was for him.

7- you should let me (love you) by godsensei

There’s something in the bathtub. Suddenly, Lance is pissed at his past self for watching so many horror movies with creepy shower scenes. He’s certainly too young and beautiful to die like this, right?

Right, totally.

He hesitates, but creeps forward, peeking slowly behind the curtain.

Hm. There’s a hot guy in there.

8- just call me daddy by proletaricat [Explicit and omegaverse]

It's the typical a/b/o story - someone's off their suppressants, surprise heats, bam sex! Except this time Lance escapes capture with the help of Hunk and Shiro has to apologize for his behavior later, interrupting Lance in the middle of his Altean telenovela. Then they bang. It's... it's basically just a PWP with daddy kink and knotting.

9- Sometimes Playing Around with the Occult Can Turn Out Well (Like... REALLY well) by gorgawesome [Explicit]

Lance had the best costume prepared for this Halloween Party. He was totally gonna slay and finally get laid for the first time in MONTHS!

Except it's Halloween Night and he's stuck looking after the family bookstore, because local robberies or something. Honestly? He was too busy pouting to be listening.

Can an awful, boring night turn for the better? Yes. Yes, it can.

10- I found religion between your thighs by KillTheDirector [in process]

He had been topside for over four decades, enjoying the freedom he never had down in the pit. Routines were established then broken then reestablished, but Shiro abided by them because that’s what kept him alive.

Then he met a witch that was more suited to being an incubus than him.

11- One Symbol Off by Silas_Writes [Explicit]

anonymous whispered: Incubus/succubus shiro and witch lance use summoning circles and potions inappropriately

12- To Seduce the Seducer by singtolife [Explicit]

At a college party, Shiro meets Lance, and they hit it off immediately. Only to find out after they have sex that this amazingly sexy guy was a little too good to be true.

13- Blue Skies in Stockholm by Shanced [Explicit, non-con and Kuro]

Lance gets captured by Shiro (who was fused with Kuro by Haggar) and the rest is self indulgent kinky sex. Lance gets raped and wrecked by Shiro and develops Stockholm syndrome, or the likes of it, Shiro can apparently unfuse with Kuro and they have a really good time.

14- Treadmill by kitausu

At 2 minutes of torture in, Lance heard the buzz/click noise of someone’s electronic key activating and opening the door to the gym. And of course, because this was Lance’s life, Hunk had pushed him onto a treadmill with a mirror right in front, affording him an absolutely stunning view of the man walking through the door.

Had Lance loved till now? He was pretty sure that he had never even felt an emotion before seeing the beautiful male specimen reflected beside his face in the mirror.

or, Lance waxes poetic about Shiro's everything, and Hunk set it all up in the first place.

15- Black & Blue & Red All Over by thesynapticsnap

When Lance shows up to the gym with a limp and covered in bruises, Shiro assumes the worst (spoiler: It’s nothing bad! Nor anything kinky, surprisingly).

16- Car Door Blues by ShiekahKami

Shiro never would have expected that accidentally knocking that cute guy out could change his life for the better.

17- Give It a Shance by YonaDawn [in process]

The domestic life of Shance. At least until they become Twitter and Youtube famous. Then it's a wild domestic life.

18- Bowling for Balls? by EllaAniMine

They were just supposed to be bowling... It was harmless fun, or it was supposed to be.

Lance thought he was being funny, but a message that was supposed to be a joke was sent, and now Lance isn't laughing.

19- llévame si quieres by kalakauuas

Shiro takes his dogs to the park and meets the world’s cutest uncle and his niece.

"Lance and his little niece, petting Shiro’s dog, looking soft and serene; it’s like nothing could ever be truly wrong in the world if this is able to happen. What Shiro wouldn’t give to have this sight in front of him over and over again. He scratches Sirius behind the ears, and gets a reassuring lick in return as an act of solidarity. You’ve got this. Man’s best friend, for real."

20- (Mg,Fe2+)2(Mg,Fe2+)5Si8O22(OH)2 by starboyshiro

Lance and Shiro decided to expand their little family and adopt a dog. What they name him is rather questionable.

21- You're Worth More by AbandonedLibrary

Lance wanted to prove his pod his worth after that jackass rolo came in with black pearls in hand.

As the pearl expert in the group he needed to keep his name sake.

Though... Lance learned there are things worth more than pretty pearls.

22- Curiosity Caught a Cat by c0cunt

Shiro has been distancing himself from his friends and family for a long time. All he really has now is Matt's cat, Zekrom. At least, until a man crashes into his balcony to pet his cat.

23- Head Over Heels by saecchii [Kemonomimi and Explicit]

Shiro gains a new roommate, who he is absolutely smitten with.

24- Stray Cats by kitausu

Lance is really enamored with the cute guy who keeps coming into his pet store and buying WAY too much cat food.

or, Shiro moves into a new apartment and sees how many strays there are in the parking lot and just HAS to feed them.

25- Kiss the Bees by kitausu

Lance is smitten with the beekeeper next door.

26- BlueVoice by kitausu [Explicit]

Lance runs a relatively popular voice RP blog and one day hears his own voice coming out of the headphones of the really hot guy next to him at the gym.

27- Change of Plans by kitausu

When Shiro is left at the alter, he decides to go on his honeymoon alone. Enter Lance, the man Shiro had hired to take him and his would-be bride on a month long tour of Europe.

28- To The Grooms by AChapterCanBeABook

There is no better way to celebrate the best day of your life than reminiscing with the people who you love the most and who have been with you through nearly every step in your life. Let's not forget a little bit of embarrassment which goes along with best men speeches, especially if your best man is your brother and the other best man is his accomplice in this whole thing. nevertheless, it doesn't fail in livening up a wedding as well as making in just that much more sentimental.

29- Tell the Truth by thesynapticsnap

Lance is bitten by a 'love bug', turning him into a blushing, stammering mess around his crush- Shiro. Shiro helps him deal with the negative side effects, learning more about Lance's crush and considering his own feelings as they talk.

30- Guess Again by thesynapticsnap

Keith confronts Lance about something he witnessed during a team mind-melding exercise…too bad he’s got the wrong culprit.

31- Smooth by thesynapticsnap

Lance’s first meeting with Shiro doesn’t go as planned – it turns out so much better than he expected.

32- Blind Date by kitausu

“What’s the crisis? I thought you had a blind date? Didn’t go well?”

Lance wailed, collapsing into the couch with a dramatic sigh.

“Yesss, Hunk. He’s too handsome. He’s just so hot. You would not believe what he did to me. I still can’t believe it.”

or, Lance goes on a blind date and can't handle how hot Shiro is.

33- SandMan by Might_suck_but_thats_ok

Shiro goes on a blind date with Lance.

34- Lucky by zombiegardener

Shiro accidentally tells Keith that he's dating one of his frenemies from high school over a Saturday morning phone call, because how is this his life?

35- Boundaries by zombiegardener

It's really hard to keep a relationship secret when you're making out in the middle of a hallway.

36- beauty queen on the silver screen (living life like i'm in a dream) by heavenlyrare

What do you give to someone who already holds the world in their palms?

OR

The sweaters Shiro’s mom knits him every Christmas actually serves a greater purpose for once.

37- Text Me by strawberrylovely

Shiro, trying to get away from two girls who won't stop flirting with him, sits down next to a stranger who he pretends is his boyfriend. The stranger, who has pretty blue eyes, goes along with it.

38- Undateable by strawberrylovely

Lance just wishes someone would date him. Shiro offers to do just that.

39- Black Friday by strawberrylovely

Lance is gonna get that stand mixer. Unless of course a handsome stranger gets to it first.

40- Midnight Tradition by strawberrylovely

Lance goes to a New Years party and meets a guy named Shiro. They may be strangers, but they kiss at midnight anyway. After the party, Lance doesn’t think he’ll ever see Shiro again. That is until the next New Years party when the two meet again and a tradition starts.

Parts 1 / 2 / 3

[frighthouseofalighthouse]

All weird asks!! They're so good!

Sorry this is a bit late, babe! I wanted to wait til I had the opportunity to answer all these uninterrupted!

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Coffee mugs! tbh I drink tea out of coffee mugs because who actually uses teacups? I mean my grandma has tons and I would use them, but the handles are so tiny and I am v clumsy so it scares me.

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Chocolate bars!!! I’m too impatient for lollipops and plus they always get coated in saliva which just...drips down my chin since my mouth is already full.

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Bubblegum! I love cotton candy but I can only handle a bit at a time tbh. Also I haven’t had bubblegum in almost two years bc of braces and I miss it so much I can’t wait to have it again.

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Okay, so even though I’ve always been homeschooled, when I was in elementary school we did this program with a ton of other homeschoolers where you could take actual classes and stuff. My teachers always said I was quiet and focused and studious, and you could always count on me to be lecturing everyone else on the instructions if they hadn’t been paying attention. (does any of that surprise anyone?)

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? GLASS SODA BOTTLES. nothing beats soda that’s been bottled in glass rather than plastic. You ever had orange cream soda from a glass bottle????? SLAPS ASS MY DUDE.

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

Pastel/boho/preppy/goth, my dude. I have so many sides to my fashion and aesthetic.

7. earbuds or headphones?

EARBUDS BC HEADPHONES NEVER FIT OVER MY EARS RIGHT. BUT EARBUDS WITH SOFT TIPS BECAUSE MY EARS ARE TOO SMALL FOR THE PLASTIC ONES.

8. movies or tv shows?

Tv shows tbh because even though I can binge 4 eps of 45 minutes each per night, they’ll hold my attention a lot more than a movie. It’s weird.

9. favorite smell in the summer?

Thunderstorms/petrichor, also natural bogs. PEAT BOG SMELL FUCKING SLAPS.

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

None. I liked trampoline time back when we took gymnastics, if that counts. I also liked jump roping and Irish step dancing.

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

Nothing lmao. I sleep til like noon and then I microwave something for lunch.

12. name of your favorite playlist?

My catchall playlist, Things I Love, my summer playlist, Summer Songs, my Gryffindor playlist, My Queen And Country playlist for writing, and my playlist for The Raven Cycle. (after I post this I’ll edit it and link them)

13. lanyard or key ring?

Keyring, a lanyard would like constantly detract from my outfit if that makes sense???

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Sour Patch Kids or Swedish Fish.

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

Between The Grapes Of Wrath, The Great Gatsby, The Handmaid’s Tale, and To Kill A Mockingbird!

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Just fucking sprawled every which way.

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

My grey converse if it’s comfortable out, my silver flip flops if it’s hot, and my fur-lined black combat boots if it’s cold.

18. ideal weather?

65-70 degrees, partly sunny, breezy, not humid.

19. sleeping position?

I need to sprawl to fall asleep, but once I’m asleep I curl up into a little ball.

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Laptop and notebook ONLY IF I’m sure of myself, which isn’t often. But I do write dense, scribbled paragraphs on sermon note pages if something comes to me during church lmao.

21. obsession from childhood?

The American Revolution, weather, astronomy, and mysteries/ghost stories.

22. role model?

Idk tbh? Lately I’m just trying to define and live up to my own standards?

23. strange habits?

Pulling the collar of my shirt up to my mouth and sucking on it. Also being a perfectionist in my writing. I don’t do messy drafts. It’s all perfect by the time I write it, and I edit/spellcheck as I go.

24. favorite crystal?

Amethyst (my birthstone), bismuth, opal, and blue goldstone.

25. first song you remember hearing?

Other than nursery rhymes/kid’s songs, it was Light Up The Sky by The Afters, or California Dreamin’ by The Mamas And The Papas.

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Find shade/a cool spot and read with a cold drink.

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

ALSO READ. And snuggle with thick socks and a cup of tea and play DS games all day.

28. five songs to describe you?

My five faves atm -

I Am Here // Pink

The Pines // Roses and Revolutions

Soldier, Poet, King // The Oh Hellos

Traveler’s Song // Aviators

Hymn // Kesha

29. best way to bond with you?

Share my interests about politics, history, books, true crime, paranormal, tv shows, and also be kind and understanding when I don’t text for long periods bc I don’t feel up to talking.

30. places that you find sacred?

The woods on the hill behind my house. Dense, deeply green, secluded woods. Hedge mazes. Old and crumbling castles. Anywhere beneath a clear sky and a full moon. Your heart when you’ve come to terms with your fears and made peace with yourself. Anyplace with historical significance. Bookstores on an autumn/winter day. Libraries.

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

A kickass plaid, bruh. Also my leather jacket - once I lose enough shoulder weight to fit in it again.

32. top five favorite vines?

Fre shavoc ado, the one where the dog eats the butterfly, the Lin-Manuel Miranda one where he’s brainstorming, “what the FUCK kind of weather is this, and the dad and son with the saxophone and the oven door.

33. most used phrase in your phone?

“oh mood”

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

“WOW! It’s NatureStone!”

35. average time you fall asleep?

Right now it’s 4-5 am because I suck.

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

I Can Haz Cheezburger, My mom used to look at the website with me when I was like 10.

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

They both have pros and cons. :/ Duffel bags are easier to carry but suitcases keep stuff from getting broken better.

38. lemonade or tea?

TEAAAAAAAAAAAA

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

Lemon meringue pie!!! my stepdad made a really good one the other week.

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

Nothing, since I was homeschooled. Same weird shit that always happens at home. Our safe word for when I got overwhelmed in math was “quokka” and we’d stop and look at cute quokka pictures.

41. last person you texted?

My gf :)

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

Jacket pockets because things are not only hard to fit in girls’ pants pockets, but if you put a chapstick/lipstick in there it starts to melt :(

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

BETWEEN HOODIE AND CARDIGAN. SO VERSATILE. SO COMFY.

44. favorite scent for soap?

Irish Spring soap or the blue Dial bars smells better and cleaner than anything to me.

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Fantasy. It can take me a bit to get into it, but once I do, I love it. I only do sci-fi if it has rebellion and isn’t heavy on the sci. And superhero movies are great but a lot of the tropes are meh. Fantasy has a lot more versatility if you ask me.

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Sweatpants/leggings and a soft, well worn tee.

47. favorite type of cheese?

Parmesan, white cheddar, or Muenster.

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

Raspberry!

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

“do no harm but take no shit.”

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

A really poorly edited political ad on tv a couple years ago. There was weird jazz playing, flames in the background of an image of the Capitol Building, and then the top of the dome opened and this guy’s face was inside. It is the single funniest ad I have ever seen and I laughed for 10 minutes so hard I was like an inch away from passing out.

51. current stresses?

Passing my driving test next month, getting a job, figuring out if my math skills are okay enough to take the SAT or an equivalent test.

52. favorite font?

Baskerville or Georgia!

53. what is the current state of your hands?

My fingernails are short bc I picked them while reading earlier, my cuticles suck bc I pick at those two, and my pinky is obliterated and scabbed because of when I accidentally sliced through the nail with a razor while shaving the other day. So, not great, but I’m living.

54. what did you learn from your first job?

That kids can be really annoying but also really cute and hilarious if you can get them to calm down. And also that baby fingernails are surprisingly sharp.

55. favorite fairy tale?

The OG Princess and the Frog where it’s implied the prince and “faithful Henry,’ his carriage driver, fall in love and ride off together at the end. JACOB AND WILHELM GRIMM SAID GAY RIGHTS.

56. favorite tradition?

Every December, my mom and I drive around after dark at night and I play Pokemon and we rate everyone’s Christmas decorations based on tackiness.

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

So isolated I was as a preteen/early teenager, my self harm, and the internalized anger over my abusive relationship and PTSD.

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Writing, puzzle solving, singing, and calligraphy.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“Benvoli-no.” (I recently remembered I used to say that a lot and I need to bring it back)

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

Dark, fairy tale anime with a lot of secrets to uncover and some dark woods.

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

TV show - “I am the Bad Wolf. I create myself.” - Doctor Who

Movie - “It’s not about deserve. It’s about what you believe. And I believe in love.” - Wonder Woman

Book - “If you never saw the stars, candles were enough.” - The Dream Thieves, by Maggie Stiefvater

62. seven characters you relate to?

Dean Winchester - Supernatural

Sam Winchester - Supernatural

Jack Kline Winchester - Supernatural

Charlie Bradbury - Supernatural

Gansey - The Raven Cycle

Blue Sargent - The Raven Cycle

Hermione Granger - Harry Potter

63. five songs that would play in your club?

Final Song // MO

Call Home // Heathers

I Am Here // Pink

Babylon // 5 Seconds of Summer

Shake It Off // Taylor Swift

64. favorite website from your childhood?

WEBKINZ AND THE OLD AMERICAN GIRL WEBSITE

65. any permanent scars?

Yes, I have several that remain from self harm, scars all over my left knee from being a clumsy child, and most of all a major scar down the center of my chest from heart surgery when I was a baby.

66. favorite flower(s)?

Rose, lavender, lilac, and dahlia.

67. good luck charms?

Not really???

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

Olives, mushrooms, radishes, cottage cheese, and ranch dressing are all foul.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

Martin Luther didn’t actually nail his 95 theses to the church door, he just kind of passed them around, which is a lot less dramatic tbh. Also light-up signs were first used in New York City in 1884.

70. left or right handed?

I’m left-handed!

71. least favorite pattern?

I think zebra stripes, leopard print, and houndstooth are super ugly.

72. worst subject?

Math for sure. Even science would be easier if it didn’t involve so much math.

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

Wendy’s fries and chocolate frosty!!!

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

I think a 7, usually. My pain tolerance is pretty high because of a) years of self harm, and b) due to my PTSD my muscles are constantly tense and in pain anyway.

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I was 4, and it had been loose but it fell out when I was trying to blow up an inflatable ball.

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Fries or roasted potatoes that are charred and crunchy on the bottom. Chips are a close third.

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

Idk, my grandma’s the one with the green thumb mania lmao. But She keeps a lot of violets and arrowhead plants in the windowsills!

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

NEITHER I HATE BOTH COFFEE AND SUSHI IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES.

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

Never had a school ID, but my temporary license photo is actually pretty good right now!

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

I really like earth tones for myself.

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

THEY ARE THE SAME MF THING. Also I call them both, it just depends on what comes out of my mouth haha.

82. pc or console?

PC, I guess, though I don’t really game. I just watch my stepdad game.

83. writing or drawing?

WRITING. I cannot draw to save my life.

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Podcasts, talk radio is so annoying.

84. barbie or polly pocket?

Barbie, although I loved both.

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Mythology I guess??? Although again, I love both.

86. cookies or cupcakes?

COOKIESSSSS

87. your greatest fear?

Rejection, losing people I love, people secretly hating me. Also drowning, spiders, clowns, and guns.

88. your greatest wish?

To be a semi-successful author and work in a library/museum.

89. who would you put before everyone else?

My mom and my gf.

90. luckiest mistake?

Almost dropping a knife blade first on my foot but it landed between my toes.

91. boxes or bags?

um boxes I guess? I’m really good at fitting things in tetris style.

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

FAIRY LIGHTS AND DIM YELLOW LAMPS.

93. nicknames?

Ell, Alexander, Ellie, Little Lion, and Nerd.

94. favorite season?

FALL FALL FALL FALL

95. favorite app on your phone?

Tumblr or Spotify. Two apps I couldn’t live without.

96. desktop background?

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

About a half dozen. Mine, my mom’s, my stepdad’s, my grandparents’ home number, my grandpa’s, and my grandma’s.

98. favorite historical era?

Both the American Revolutionary period and the Victorian Era (esp in Britain)

THANK YOU LOVE THIS WAS SUPER FUN

[megamegaturtle]

gorgeous (chapter two)

Spencer Reid x Reader Fic

warning: friendships be forming with extra cuteness and realness.

(i will never post a chapter at a reasonable hour, i swear lol)

part one

(Ao3)

WC: 11.K

Summary: You’re early for your first day at work, but the universe is a funny thing where butterfly wings cause hurricanes from a wing’s single flutter. A story about how you and Spencer become friends and one day lovers.

tag list: @everyday-imfangirling @gigiree

Your story is starting, a new beginning with a new friend, when your doorbell rings on a quiet Saturday morning. A butterfly swarm wreaks havoc in your stomach, anxiety and nerves old friends you thought you forgot, but find you again with a little knock knock. You take a deep breath as you stuff your feet into house slippers. It’s too late now to cancel and fake sick.

Coming towards your door, you pause and fluff your hair in the mirror, trying to look presentable and clean one last time. You look through the peephole, the moment of truth wrapped wearing purple and a long brown coat. Doctor Spencer Reid rocks on the balls of his feet and you promise yourself not to throw up.

  (You really want to throw up.)

  Pressing the passcode into your alarm, the device happily beeps as you undo the chain latch and unlock both deadbolts. You pluck a bright smile to wear.

  “Hey! Hi, hello—” oh dear, you’ve greeted him three times, might as well continue. “Hola, uh, ni-hao, hmmm, aloha, howdy, ohayou, bonjour—and yeah, welcome to my humble abode.”

  A small smile rests on Spencer’s mouth, laughter at the edges. “Hi.”

  You open the door wider and let him walk past you. Last second you snag the strap of his messenger bag unexpectedly, pulling him to a quick stop. Your nails briefly scrap the fabric of his coat before you shut the door behind you both.

  You’re doing great, you tell yourself. A for effort.

  A moment ticks before you point down at his feet, his brows furrowed in confusion. “Sorry. I have a no shoe policy.” Shuffling around him, you open a small cabinet and pull out a thing of slippers. “You can wear these if you’d like. They’re new! Or socks are fine, but no shoes please. Too much grime and stuff.”

  Doctor Reid nods, mildly curious but nevertheless, sits down on your bench and pulls off his shoes. You notice his mismatched socks, deep purple and ruby red. You giggle and find them to be a good omen.

  Spencer shoots you a brief look. “Yes, yes. They’re not matching, but I like them.”

  Tension rolls out of you as you quickly redo your door and reset the alarm. “No, it’s cute. I hardly wear matching socks myself.”

  “Oh?”

  “Mainly because I’m very lazy to match them up together again though.”

  “Well,” you hear him say, “I do mine for a bit of luck.”

  You laugh again and gesture towards the kitchen.

  “I guess today’s gonna be your lucky day.”  

  (Or maybe it’s yours since you’re so excited to have company with someone so cute.)

-

“You’re doing the recipe completely out of order.”

  “Not completely out of order,” you say as you whisk the dry ingredients together. “Just...slightly out of order.”

  You don’t bother looking up at Spencer, but you can feel his frustration roll off him like hot waves filling every inch of your kitchen. You do your best not to snicker at his expense as he reads to you the banana bread recipe once again that he’s already memorized perfectly.

  “If you just set up everything before you started kind of mixing, this would have been a lot easier,” he chides, mashing ripe bananas into a bowl.

  “Says the man with two perfectly good hands!” You shoot him a look, huffing incredulously.

  “That I am using,” he points out.

  If would have known you that a year ago that you’d have Dr. Spencer Reid in your kitchen making banana bread, you would have laughed so hard you would’ve cried. But here you are doing exactly that with you both talking. There is bickering and bantering. And your kitchen is filled with such delicious laughter that you might weep.

  If only you got the courage to be his friend ages ago, just think how many more baking days the two of you could have shared. If only, if only.   

  “What are you anyway? Some kind of scientist or something?” you say, cracking the eggs in a small bowl.

  Spencer’s face falls completely flat, but his tone only bubbles into annoyance as you flick flour his way. “Well, yes! I’m a doctor! And a bit of a scientist, I guess!” His hands fly up in the air, accidently knocking into a pot that hangs above your small center island.

  You burst out laughing. “Chillax, my dude! Please don’t go breaking my kitchen,” you say between deep laughs. “I want my security deposit back.”

  Spencer taps the counter with displeasure. “Then please just follow the recipe. This is like watching a bad chemistry experiment. Baking is a science,” he emphasizes.

  You click your tongue. “Nerd.”

  “Am not.”

  “Um, are too,” you reply as you wipe a random spill. “Besides, baking is about love and love is more than some chemicals in your brain. It’s magic and all that stuff. And no facts you got tucked up in that noggin of yours is going to tell me otherwise.”

  Reid takes a deep breath and chuckles quietly. “Are you always this...sassy?”

  You flash him a quick grin. “Always.”  

  You grab the butter from the freezer and slice ¾ a cup to soften in the microwave as the kitchen quietens to the happy hum of radioactive waves. You look over up again, noticing Reid holding his chin in his hand, staring at you.

  It’s a bit intense. The way he’s looking at all of you in your movements. His eyes pierce through you, catch your breath. It’s like you’re pinned under a microscope, chest ripped open with your soul exposed.

  “Hey, don’t know if you know this, dear Doctor,” you try to joke, “but this is a no profiling zone.”

  Spencer blinks once and denies it, his voice going an octave higher. “I wasn’t—I wasn’t profiling, I was thinking. Vast difference.”

  You scoff, playfully rolling your eyes. “Oh no, believe me. I heard you thinking. I think everyone in the greater D.C. area heard you thinking, but,” you pause, grabbing both the white and brown sugar from across the island. “But I know exactly what you were doing and I don’t need you to profile me in my own home.”  

  Spencer remains quiet, a silly grin digging into his cheeks at your indignation. You huff once more and accidentally put the mixer on high in the dry ingredients bowl. Your surprised yelp is drown out by the sound of the beaters hitting the blow and Spencer’s laughter.

  Flour, thankfully, is only slightly everywhere.

  Your face runs hot as you turn it off.

  “You're so stupid…” you mumble. “Shouldn't have invited you over.”

  He takes a big gulp of air, but happiness still paints his face with a smidge of curiosity. “Why did you invite me over? Not that I mind helping you bake, but…” he shrugs.

  You...merr. As you call it, not a grr or a groan, but your distress sound of merr that conveys all negative and embarrassing things in one small and concise phrase.

  Spencer senses your discomfort and everything shifts to the unspoken words that the two of you haven't dared exchanged. He patiently waits as he leans against a counter and sips a glass of water. The only sound in the kitchen is the slight scraping of metal on metal as you whisk the dry ingredients again.

  “Because I am sick of bad thought spirals,” you confess. “I'm sick of doubting myself and not being a good person and just--it’s dumb. I'm dumb. The whole time so like...fuck thought spirals where I don't think I'm good enough to be your friend.” You pause, you heart thumping in your chest and you—

  — promised yourself that when you doubt yourself, that you’ll just dive head first, be impulsive because when you stop thinking, just for one moment, things go better than you’d ever assume. Your brain is your own worst enemy. So, you keep that racing heart and you clutch it tight. You feel your stomach twist and you don’t care anymore because you are taking a stand and this is your day and you

  —are in control.

  (Even if your brain tells you otherwise, if it tries to break you down again, make you stop talking, make you push all your fears into that little black box that sits at the bottom of your spine and let history repeat again and again.)

  Butterfly wings cause hurricanes and you’re breaking down barriers with the wind at your back, wings jutting through your shoulders to carry yourself higher. No safety, just free falling into the moment, into this next commitment because you can’t turn back time.

  “So, yeah. Fuck that nonsense. I’m gonna be your friend and I’m gonna friend you so hard and you’re just gonna have to deal with it.”

  (You remember the triangle your therapist drew for you one day, about how bad thoughts consume you and you just sat there thinking you needed to break it. That you were stronger than arbitrary shapes that attempted to define you.

  That you were good enough.)

  You force yourself to look Spencer in the eye, well aware his brain is going into overdrive at what you said. How could it not? There was so much to unpack. Low self-esteem, self-hatred, wobbly self-worth.

  But you will not falter. He will not forget your promise and you will not let yourself break it.

  But he does the doctor thing and asks. “Are there good thought spirals? Is this a good thought spiral?”

  He smiles small yet sincere and joy radiates from the center of your stomach, tender blooms unfurling in your bloodstream as relief sings throughout you. Your nose burns with intense emotion, your eyes wanting to shed tears, but you don’t want to be a crybaby in front of him.

  You turn and wipe at your eye, ready to cream the butter and sugar together. “No, this is a good action spiral. Kicking down doors kind of thing.”

  “Sounds intense.”

  “I’m kind of an intense person,” you quip.

  “I figured. I kinda profiled that about you,” he teases.

  You throw a dishrag at him, the worries you had disappearing as you hear his laughter mix with yours. Being impulsive has proven once again to be your aid.  

  He comes to stand beside you, a good distance between the two of you but there is a connection and a comfort there now. You two are no longer separated by your center island, but are now standing on the same side of the room. He waits patiently as you cream the sugar and butter.

  “Hey,” he starts, “by the way, don’t think that I’m not gonna—what was it?— friend you hard too,” he softly confesses.

  You beam so wide the apples of your cheeks scrunch your eyes. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

  You quietly finish mixing the rest of the ingredients as Spencer beings washing a few assorted utensils. Soft music plays from your phone, your hums sometimes in time with a tune. Butterfly wings brush against your heart as you both work throws this friendly new beginning.

  You fill both pans halfway with batter and pop them in the oven. Setting the timer, you glance over at your cozy living room area.

  If this was a different kind of social call, you’d suggest watching something on Netflix. Throw in a perfect excuse to cuddle close and test boundaries to see how much you could get away with. But you refuse your heart the luxury of daydreaming something more passionate and most likely to be a plot from a nameless romance blurring in your memories.

  Instead, you focus on reality, on being a better person than you were yesterday. You promised yourself you’d be more open—make this friendship happen because deep in your bones, you have this feeling that having Spencer Reid in your life will be worth it.

  You take a deep breath and catch his attention. A nervous smile paints your face as you gesture towards the other side of your apartment. “C’mon. I wanna show you something.”

  Spencer tilts his head with curiosity, but his steps pad quietly on your floor as you creak the second bedroom’s door.

  “Excuse the mess,” you say, flicking on the bright overhead light.

  Fresh paint perfumes the room. Canvases line the wall, stacked neatly by a lone bookshelf jam packed with art books and an old, beloved chair. A plastic tarp rests in the center, an easel propped up with a wet piece.

  You hear Spencer gasp, his attention fixed intensity on the portrait you’re still painting. Your heart flutters as you wait for him to speak.

  (You think it funny, that for someone so filled with words, art makes him speechless.)  

  “Wow, —” he says, your name soft in his mouth. “I didn’t—didn’t know you could paint!” He rushes, his words starting to fumble. “It’s—she’s so beautiful. Who is that?”    

  Love blossoms throughout you as you take a step forward and trace the rough edges of the canvas with your fingers. Luminous dark skin and a tender smile fill your vision, the ghost of laughter ringing in your ears. Her eyes twinkle at a joke you told her, this painting a representation of a candid photo you took earlier in the year.  

  “My soulmate,” you explain with affection. “A girl named Rosa, who I love absolutely without conditions.”

  Spencer doesn’t say anything for a few moments, as if choosing his words carefully. He stands near your, his questions wrapping around you almost like a physical thing. “...what’s that like? For you to sound so sure?”  

  You think of late night conversations and exchanged e-mails, the calm that follows that if you need her, she’ll be there. In the trust of free falling without a parachute that she would defy gravity for a single moment to ensure your safety—that you would do the same. It’s—

  “--never to be obligated to love someone, that I love her simply because she exists and there is peace in that. She is—She is my other half: my thoughts easy for her to untangle, the two of us on a shared frequency I’ve never had with someone else. We have no expectations of each other, just the hope to be lifelong companions and beloved friends.”       

  “Just hope?”

  His unspoken question: is that truly enough? There is doubt in pause, his avenue unexplored by him and many others. To just love a friend as an extension of yourself and not want more.

  You glance up at him and smile. “Of course. Just hope. Can’t make Rosa stay in my life nor can she do the same to me. We don’t cling to each other, Doctor. We just choose to exist with each other,” you say. “Rosa is—Rosa is not someone who I love romantically—that...that has requirements.”  

  Spencer reaches out and touches the edge of the painting. “Like what?”

  “Mmmm. Well, I have to be sexually attracted to that person, for one. And that person needs to pay attention to me and spend time with me. That person has to have similar values as me, same wants to build a life together with me. This person just won’t be my soulmate and I’m not looking to fall in love with a soulmate,” you add with a small laugh. “Rosa is my carbon copy and I’m looking for someone to compliment me, make me a better person, challenge me—well, you get the picture, I think.”

  (You thought you found that person already, already had two greatest loves of your life, but that—that, of course, never happened.)    

  The room falls quiet and you swallow, realizing you just—emotional dumped all over the good doctor and horror washes over you. You turn to him, your eyes wide and panicked, your hand flying to your mouth.

  “Oh my god, I am so sorry, that was like—extremely personal and a lot to handle and—”

  Spencer blinks before grinning, his hands tucked into his pockets. “No, it was...nice. You really love her and...and I don’t know, that sounds nice, to love someone without conditions.”

  His eyes gaze away, as if he’s looking for something in the distance and your heart feels heavy in your chest. There is a bittersweet softness there and you wonder if his mind drifts away to someone else.

  “Can I—” you try to say. “Was it—?”

  —like how I love? you want to ask, but you don’t. The question too personal on your lips, but you know he’s heard it anyway.

  Hazel eyes flicker to yours, a haunting smile hanging to his lips. “Maybe a bit of both, by your definition.”

  “That’s still beautiful.”

  “Is it?”

  “I think so,” you say, guiding him back to the kitchen. “Love is like beauty; in the heart of the beholder.”

  “You know it doesn't go that way,” Spencer’s voice says behind you.  

  You grin. “True, but do you want your heart to be constricted by other people or do you want to decide for yourself?”

  It is quiet for a moment, the sounds of the oven the only thing making noise.

  “What if I never move on? What if I never want to move on?”

  You take a deep breath, choosing your words with care. “I think...I think if you feel that your love with Maeve is able to sustain you for the rest of your life, that's awesome. Breathtaking even. To be that devoted to someone even through…” you swallow, bracing yourself to mention the elephant in the room, “death. But,” you pause, “life continues, Spencer. It just depends on how you want to interact with it. I know for me, I need that kind of love in my life and I have a big enough heart to fall in love again. Yours seems to be a bit different.”

  Spencer’s face pulls into a tight smile. “I always seen to be a bit different.”

  “Different is good though. It’s human to be unique, or rather, it’s American to be an individual. You are only a byproduct of your nation,” you say, cheeriness in your voice. “And as for love, whatever makes you happy, Spence—-er,” you quickly add, feeling your eyes going wide at almost calling him his nickname. “Only you get to decided that, Spencer,” you emphasize the er .

  The corners of his mouth relax and his smile becomes more genuine. “Thank you, ——,” he says, your name only adding to the moment of friendship. “I appreciate it.”

  “Anytime, Doctor. I’m always here.”  

  And if there is one moment you can keep from today, it will be this one. Where sunshine streams through the window and outlines Spencer in a glorious halo. He smiles once more, wonderful and bright, like starlight and good things and trust for new beginnings.

  “I know.”

-

You get lost in D.C. on weekends when work isn’t busy. There are sights to see, history under cobblestoned streets and your breath finds reason to stop ceasing. It’s beautiful, to be in your nation’s capital, but sad to discover all on your own.

  When not exploring, you call Rosa, missing her company more than anyone from back home.

  Sometimes you leave her long and detailed voicemails retelling your day. You might leave two or three because you have so much to say. Yet sometimes, there are no voicemails to leave, not when she picks up on the very first ring.

  Her voice is soft and sweet, mousey and kind. “Hello, bestie?”

  She always answers like it’s a question, like she can’t believe that you’re actually calling.

  (You call on a schedule. You’re predictable this way and yet, after all these years, she still finds magic in your friendship, like you’re not quite all there.)

  You squeal at her voice. “Rosa! I misses you!”

  Her laugh bells gloriously. “I misses you too. How are you? Did you eat?”

  “Yes, mom. I ate. I’m good. Just chilling at home. It’s—lonely, truth be told.”

  “Mmmm,” she hums. “You’re always a bit lonely it seems. But you’re making friends! Like with Dr. Reid and Penelope! And Derek!”

  “Yeah, I am... I guess, just,” you say, your voice quieter as your trace your feelings on your thigh. “Lonely. I think I’m always a little lonely.”

  “That’s because your heart is too big for your chest.”

  “Are you saying I’m the opposite of the Grinch?” you joke.

  “Of course! That’s why I love you.”

  She says it so effortlessly, like listing a fact. Which it is. Rosa wouldn’t be your soulmate if she didn’t love you You can’t help but smile fondly at the way she boldly declares it.

  “I love you too. When will you become a real doctor and become my sugar mama?”

  “Maybe after I pay off my student loans,” she chuckles. She pauses and you can sense her question. “Have you...have you thought about dating again?”

  You suck in a breath. “Dating is hard...I wouldn’t even know where to start...”

  “Oh, where’s my lion girl?” she chides. “You’re always so brave and yet you’re gonna run away again. Last time you ran away, you weren’t able to make a friend for two years, right?”

  Rosa might wax lyrical poetry to you often, but apparently tonight’s not the night for her endless praises.

  (She tells you what you need to hear despite that it’s not always wanted.)  

  “....okay, rude. And I don’t know! Dating means being vulnerable and how am I supposed to open myself up to a complete stranger again. Every boy I’ve ever dated has been a friend.”

  She clicks her tongue, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Why don’t you date a boy at work then? Aren’t you friends with them?”

  “Rosa, you’re like the smartest person I know, but that is the stupidest thing you’ve ever said. Date a boy at work, she says. Like there are boys for me to date at work.”

  “Well, I think there is one man you could date—-”

  Your heart speeds up and you know exactly where this is going to go. It’s filed under “do not think about” for a reason.

  “Oh, what’s that, Rosa?” you say. “Your patient is calling you? I’m going through a tunnel? Oh no! I can’t hear you--bleh!”

  You hang up and toss your phone across the couch. Your heart is still racing as her text message comes through.

  Think about it, dear. You know you want to .

  “Ha, how wrong you are, my dear,” you say as you type back your reply.

  (But not really. Rosa is hardly ever wrong about you.)  

  -

  “Thanks for coming with me tonight, Penelope.”

  The moon hangs fat in the sky as you pull out of the parking lot. Your cheeks are still cold, but your belly is full from delicious hot pot. You think of home and your friends who would go out late to eat shabu shabu. You’re glad you gotta do it again here.

  Penelope giggles and rubs her hands together to create some heat, waiting for the car’s heater to kick in. A part of you wishes that you opted for the model with heated seats, but Penelope doesn’t seem to mind, her mittens jiggling with little bells.

  “No, thank you , Miss Speed Racer! Tonight has been mind blowing. From an all-woman car meet to hot pot? I don’t think I’ve had hot pot? It's so delicious! Cooking all the meat, or my case tofu, and veggies. Like soup fondue!”

  You grin and pull out of the parking lot, enjoying the way streetlights filter through the windshield. Like a little meteor shower as you go by each one just for you. Make a wish and see if it comes true , you loftily think.

  “Haha. It is a lot like soup fondue! But it's just a fun thing to do and the girls were so lovely. I'm glad there is a woman car community in D.C.!”

  “And what was that thing you were talking about the girl with pink in her hair? Something like tashi? ” Penelope asks.

 “Itasha,” you state. “It means ‘painful car’ as in painful to look at or to your wallet. It's wrapping your car with vinyl mostly these days with anime or video game characters. Dudes are more into it than ladies, but it’s really cool driving around in a customizable car, I think! I would want more like Japanese pop-culture art on my car such as acid bears or something more than a hot anime girl, ya know?”

  It’s part of the reason you bought a Japanese sports car. Itasha . Despite that it can look silly, a part of you would love to have a Kingdom Hearts dedicated wrap or something bright like Fruits Basket.

  Penelope laughs and the sound warms your soul. It’s sweet, her ability to be completely expressive. “You really are a weeb, aren’t you?”

  “Oh yeah. I am, but it’s just for fun. I like the pretty colors and cool fantastical stories and stuff. The way they just—blindly do the impossible and create worlds that are based on the impossible alone. That’s amazing and so, so hopeful…is that wrong?”

  “No, no. It’s just—I didn’t realize you really liked Japanese pop culture so much or that you were so knowledgeable about it.”

  “One of my capstone projects in college was about the American otaku community,” you say with a laugh. If only that version of you could see where you are now. Then you had wanted to be a diplomat and now you work for the FBI. Go figure.  “It was for a class about fandom. Which, I must add, was a heckin’ blast.. So yeah, I might know a thing or two when it comes to trends and stuff,” you conclude with a satisfied smirk.  

  “That is so, so, so fascinating.”

  You snort. “Don’t get me started. Please.”

  “Oh, I think I want to get you a little revved up!”

  You shake your head, giggling slightly as you gun it on the highway.

  “Okay. Here’s a little fun fact for you: there is this growing trend called itabagu which means ‘painful bag’. Like the same thing with the painful car, right? It's more popular with the lady people so they can show off pins and keychains of their favorite characters. When I went to an anime convention last year, there were all these backpacks for sell that had a clear cut out, so you could decorate it however you wanted. It just so neat to see how everyone stylized their fandom love. So much boy love. Everywhere.”

  “Why do you have this wealth of knowledge and have not been using it for evil ?” she stresses, glee drenched in her voice as you her see her googling away. Her mouth pops open as she sees cute bags and happy faces.  

  You laugh. “Like you said, I’m a weeb. Just a wonderfully dressed one! I keep my super geeky side a secret until the waters are safe. So much indie makeup is like… fan related too, you know. Shiro Cosmetics is dope for that. I really want a Backstreet Boys lip gloss.”

  Penelope wheezes, clutching at her heart. “There is Backstreet Boys lip gloss and this is the first I’ve heard of it? And I call myself a goddess of the internet….”

  “I think! I think that they still make it. I do know for a fact that at one time the creator made Nicholas Cage theme lipgloss and you could get one of Nic Cage dressed as a flapper.”

  Your friend is thoughtful for a moment as she relaxes against the door. You can feel her gaze focused on you as you drive her home. “I’m really glad we became friends.”

  You snort again, surprised. “Thanks?”

  “No, seriously! I mean it, you silly goose. Ever since you walked into my office two years ago, you have just been such a delightful person and I’m glad we really are good friends.”

  You smile softly to yourself, a blush creeping up your cheeks. “Well, um, thank you,” you mutter. You click your tongue. “You know I’m terrible with praise…”

  “Now that I know!” Penelope chuckles, “but I wouldn’t have it any other way. So, now I really want to go to a nerd convention with you! We can dress up together! Wouldn't that be fun?”

  You smirk to yourself and cackle. “...woman, have you not found my cosplay Instagram?”

  You almost swerve into oncoming traffic as Penelope grabs onto your arm while driving.

“YOU HAVE A COSPLAY INSTAGRAM?”

  (And yes, you do. Though it might not always be safe for work. Wink. )

-

Friendship slowly sinks into your skin as words become easier with Spencer. Gone are the days you couldn’t talk to him. No, you can talk to him just fine now. Just about anything that floats through your mind.

  “And, yeah. It’s just crazy to think that bananas have caused so much strife in Central America at the turn of the 1900s that companies like Chiquita—the one with the lady on the label, right?—known apparently as the United Fruit Company—oh my god, Spencer,” you pause, halting your steps and staring at him with wide eyes. “What if there was a UN of Fruits?” you whisper. “Little fruit diplomats .discussing international fruit policy!”

 Without missing a beat, Spencer nods thoughtfully. “Well, the International Fund for Agricultural Development (IFAD) is an international financial institution and UN specialised agency dedicated to eradicating poverty in rural areas of developing countries. Or there is The Committee on Agriculture (COAG) is one of FAO’s—Food and Agriculture Organization of the United Nations—Governing Bodies providing overall policy and regulatory guidance on issues relating to agriculture, livestock, food safety, nutrition, rural development and natural resource management.”

  You blink and tilt your head to the side. “I meant more like...fruits dressed up as politicians talking in funny accents,” you explain. He frowns slightly, almost as if he was the one who said something wrong. “But thank you for that new fun fact for my mental folder of other fun facts!” you add, bumping into his shoulder playfully.

  It’s a reflex. The touchyness. You know deep in all your rationality that you should not pat-pat, or playfully bump, or touch your co-worker. But then you have your brain stem doing complete overrides that make you do it anyway. Be friendly, that animal brain says—show people affections because you’re good at that. Do onto others what you’d like them to do to you. Isn’t that golden rule?  

  So, far—no one has mentioned any discomfort at your friendly displays. They accept your endless high fives, waves, thumbs ups, and quick hugs. Even Hotch doesn’t scowl if you wave at him when you see him or smile big or get too close. And there has definitely been a friendly clasp of your shoulder when you’ve done something right.

  (It took everything inside of you not to squeal with delight, but Hotch laughed anyway. Actually laughed, his stoic mask cracking. A part of you was afraid you brought upon an apocalypse.)

  But Reid is different. He doesn’t shake hands with strangers and only hugs people when he’s extremely close to them. Despite the ease in conversation between the two of you, you don’t think for a moment that you’re in his most inner circles.

  It’s like how in Japanese where everything is dependent of the relationship between the speaker and the other. How close they are physically, how intertwined their lives are together. Will you say kore if they’re right here, use their first name, and drop all formalities with them? Or do you are say they are , over there in distance, so far from you in friendship where last name-san is all you get with awkward smiles and stereotypical politeness.

  You feel like you’re in the middle, you feel like you’re stuck in sore —just only close enough to the person speaking to be listening, but not quite close enough to breathe correctly and relish in the proximity where language falls away. That there are no distance markers forced between the two of you and you happily be right here instead of over there .

  (Oh, if Penelope thought you were a weeb before hoo boy, if only she knew your thinking process.)

  But troublesome doubts about relationship language evaporate when Reid shakes his head and opens the door for you as you walk into the office. “That’s me. Your fun fact guy.”

  (He’s getting better at making little jokes, you notice. Or maybe he’s getting more comfortable making little jokes. Or maybe you’re rubbing off on him because that is something that you would most definitely say or—)  

  “Yes! And—and—oh yeah, I almost forgot,” you say as you gain your bearings again. “It’s crazy that unlike other cash crops like cotton, coffee, sugar, tobacco, or even cocoa, bananas aren’t processed at all really! They don’t spur for the development of other industries like textiles or more processed procedures. You just buy bananas from the store exactly how they were picked. The simple banana in all its yellow peeled goodness has caused so much trouble over being exactly how it is!”    

  Derek picks his head up from his desk and stares at you, shamelessly eavesdropping “Wait, what?”

  You turn to him, eyes bright and laughter in your voice. “It’s bananas there are Banana Wars, Morgan. Bananas!”

  Derek takes in a deep breath and laughs, going back to his paperwork. “I don’t even want to know.”

  His posture says otherwise, but you both know that if you get started on a random topic again then you’ll just continue down that road and get completely distracted.

  Spencer chuckles quietly before walking over to his desk. You do the same, your mind drifting back to political fruits and you can’t stop smiling.

  Reid clears his throat, getting your attention. “Have you ever heard about the Cake War in Mexico?”

  Your eyes go wide as you let out a bubbly laugh. “No! Tell me!”

  His relief is palpable, as if he thought you would say “no” about Cake Wars in Mexico, which couldn’t be farther from the truth.

  “Okay, so it’s actually called the Pastry War and it began in 1832 when a French pastry chef known as Monsieur Remontel claimed that Mexican officers looted his shop outside Mexico City. Remontel and others continued complaining until Prime Minister Louis-Mathieu Molè demanded that Mexico pay 600,000 pesos or about 3 million Francs. Which, considered at the time, was an outrageous amount since the daily Mexican person only made approximately one peso a day. When president Anastasio Bustamante did not make the payment, the King of France ordered his Rear Admiral Charles Baudin to declare a blockade on all Mexican ports. And that is only a tiny bit on cakes caused incredible strife in Mexico.”  

  “Oh, you can’t end there, Spencer!”

  “Okay, okay. After the City of Veracruz was captured by France and Mexico declared an all-out war, people started smuggling goods into Mexico—”

  “ Baked goods, I hope.” You’re not a very good punner, but you try your best.

  Spencer’s eyes narrow at your jest. “Ha ha, well, more like flour and one smuggling party had to leave about a hundred barrels of flour on the beach— which later will be known as Flour Bluff. And despite the fact that Mexico and France eventually came to a peace agreement where Mexico had to pay the 600,000 pesos, they never do and since France falls in 1870 and yeah. The Pastry War ended up affecting so many lives and really nothing came of it. Now, how is that for bananas?”

  You open your mouth to reply, but Derek beats you to the punch. “The only thing bananas around here is about why the both of you—Pretty Boy I can understand, but you Sunny Girl, I’m disappointed—happen to know about meaningless wars.”

  You stick your tongue out at Derek. “You’re just jealous that we’d beat you in game of Trivia Pursuit.”

  Derek smiles and gets up from his desk. “Okay, you got me there. I’m gonna get more coffee and you both can continue.”

  You roll your eyes and start to settle into your desk. Spencer’s silence alarms you and risk taking a glance at him.

  “You okay?”

  He hums. “I was just thinking...you don’t really get annoyed when I start rambling about things.”

  “Well, duh. I love to learn, Doctor. And you teach me new things all the time. Why would I be annoyed by that?”

  “I don’t know, just a lot of people are and you’re…not. That’s, as you would say, rad.”

  You huff with a small laugh. “I’m glad I’m rubbing off on you a little bit then! But yeah, I mean, sure you can ramble but so do I. I think it’s rad you don’t stop me when I start talking about a subject that you already know about. It's nice for me to have the chance to explain despite that you already know said thing. You acknowledge that I’m dying to tell someone, anyone who’ll listen.”

  “I know that feeling,” he adds with mirth. “And I don’t mind, you have a fun way of telling me about things. I like that about you. Your enthusiasm is refreshing.”

  You swallow, your heart racing up without your permission. “Thanks!” you squeak, your smile weird and squirmy.

  Your gaze drops down to files on your desk and you trace one with your finger, unsure what to say next, but you can’t deny how feeling blossoms in your chest. How something so offhanded and minor could make you feel—

  ( You’re so intelligent. You’re so fashionable. You’re adorable. You’re— )

  Nope.  This road is not worth travelling.  

-

You set up a Tinder and swipe right a few times.

  You delete the app before you can go on a single date.

  (Sometimes guys just give you that serial killer vibe and honestly, no thanks.)

-

You’re finding your place in the BAU. Making a name for yourself with management that supports you. Penelope watches over you and guides you, but Hotch is the one who calls the shots. You find yourself at his desk one morning with a coffee in your hand.

  He looks up from his paperwork briefly and welcomes you to sit.

  “Is everything okay?”

  Hotch’s voice is always quiet. You strain to listen and root yourself in the conversation. His speaking voice is different than his business voice when he’s barking orders at people. In the four walls of his office, he’s at peace and it carries in his cadence.

  You nod and place the coffee on his desk, an offering for so much more than you’re about to say. “I just wanted to say thank you for hiring me. Today’s my five-month anniversary with the BAU and well, just thank you.”

  He puts down his pen and looks at you. Sometimes you feel like he can see into you, see all the things you’re hiding, that you’ve covered up deep in your soul. His lips then curl in small yet meaningful smile as he grabs the cup and pulls it towards him. A small blessing seemingly washes over you.

  “You’ve been a great asset to the department, I think. Garcia was right about you.”

  You suppress a giggle, wanting to remain professional, but gently smile. “Don’t tell her that. She’d be so over the moon.”

  He huffs good naturedly into his cup. “Now, that I know,” he says. “But I truly mean it. I’m glad you’re part of the team. Our line of work isn’t easy and you’re bright, caring, cheery, and efficient. We couldn’t have asked for a better addition.”

  “Thank you, sir.”

  “And now that you’ve gotten over whatever complex you have towards Reid, the team functions well. The storming session is over so to speak.”

  You don’t comment on that, but you grin bashfully. “Um, well. It was immature and silly of me.” You tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.

  “I think it was human. Everyone reacts to him differently, but yours came from a place of admiration and that to me seems more positive than negative.”  

  “The world is too tiring to always be negative, but either way, I’m glad I’m part of this amazing team.”

  Hotch nods and takes another sip of coffee again. “Congrats on five months. Hopefully, we can make it to at least five years.”

  Determination ignites through you. “Most definitely, sir.”  

-

You are lost in a world of beauty. White flowers cover hillsides and pleasing music echoes for all to hear. There is a handsome man with dark hair and blue eyes wearing an adoring smile to a lovely woman. The relief is palatable between, the months apart straining their very souls.

  Someone taps on your shoulder and you jump, an earbud falling out of your ear. Your phone clatters to the desk as you whip your head around to glare at intruder.

  Spencer stands sheepishly behind you, rubbing the back of his neck. His hair is getting long again, touching the top of his collar. “Ah, sorry. Just wanted to know what you’re reading. You’ve been kinda quiet these days.”

  You’ve been on a book binge and everyone knows it. You’ve been staying up late, eyes glued to your phone as you suck down another book at any moment’s notice. Or fanfic. Just something written that makes your heart squeeze so tight you feel like you’ll die from happiness.

  (You might have a problem.

  But you’re not going to call it that.)

  Spencer is curious, staring at you with pretty hazel eyes, wanting to know what you’re reading on your devil device. He’s so tall in this moment, towering over you easily. It reminds you of the first day you met him, with excitement and glee at your edges.

  “It’s not a classic,” you say. “Or even anything scientific.”

  He shrugs. “It has to be good if you’re so into it. You’re reading a trilogy, right?”

  Profilers. Always so perceptive. You take a deep breath and swallow. “Do you promise not to judge me?”

  “Why would I judge you?”

  “I don’t know. I like weird things?”

  “I already know that. You have two full bookshelves devoted to manga in your bedroom.”

  You cross your arms and roll your eyes, trying not to grin.  “That’s not weird.”

  You remember his outrage last time he was over. He was helping editing your dissertation, so you could submit it to academic journals. While you were working on the latest draft, curiosity got the best of him and he asked if he could check out the bookcases in your bedroom. His outspoken horror at your intense graphic novel collection was comical that you found yourself being distracted for the rest of the afternoon by sharing your favorites with him.

  (He’s far more fond of your shoujo than anything else—much like his soap operas.)   

  “Maybe disappointing is the right word then,” he teases, smug as he leans slightly closer towards you.

  There is a pull in this moment, calling you to stand up and brush the hair out of his eyes. You wonder if his hair is soft, what his skin under your fingertips would feel like. You allow yourself this brief guilty pleasure.

  “You’re only upset that I don’t have classics for you. Besides, classics are weird. They’re what the youth call boring.”

  Spencer doesn’t take the bait at your taunt. He rises up his on his tiptoes and decides to be cocky instead. “Your current favorite musical is about a Russian classic.”

  “So? War and Peace is a lot more digestible when there’s singing. You should give it a listen like I suggested. The Great Comet of 1812 is amazing. Trust.”

  “My mother would skin me alive,” he says with a laugh. “And look, I’m willing to ignore the finer pieces of literature to know what you’re reading. So, please tell me? I want something new to read.” The slight begging in his voice makes you smile to yourself.

  “Okay. Um. I’ve been reading retellings of Hades and Persephone. I really like them. They’re cute, but there’s not many of them. Most of them are indie books or from small presses.”

  “Oh, really? And you mean the Rape of Persephone, right?”

  “Spencer, you and I both know that you know that it means ‘to abduct’ and not to actually rape.  Don’t start.”

  You puts his hands up in surrender. “You got me.”

  (His eyes twinkle and there is a fondness in this exchange, if only you knew so long ago that this person would mean so much to you.)

  “Anyway, just be glad I’m slowly getting over my alien hero romance stories. Because, hoo boy. Those would be...” you giggle mischievously. “Yeah, anyway. Hades and Persephone. This one I’m re-reading is the Receiver of Many . Super solid, really pretty. Maybe one too many sex scenes that kinda distract you from the main story, but it’s good. The second book, Destroyer of Light , now we’re talkin’. We definitely see Persephone come into her own and yeah. The makings of the Iron Queen are happening! It’s a good series, but it’s definitely borderline erocita.”

  “Uh.” He makes a face, clearly uncomfortable.

  You try your best not to laugh. “But this doesn’t sound like your cup of tea.”

  “I don’t think it is. Sorry.”

  You pause for a moment, tapping your finger against your chin. An idea strikes you then, bright and fresh, like the story still seared in your mind from the other night. “I do have something I think you’d like.”

  “What is it?”

  You reach for your phone and exit the current book you’re reading, deciding to dive into your Kindle Library. It’s still there at 100% completion, the book that stole your heart and made you start reading like a madwoman again. You swipe all the way left, finding an image of the book’s cover. You flip your phone around and show him.

  “Deathless ?”

  You girn. “Yes, Deathless . It’s about Koschei—the Tsar of Life.”

  Spencer studies the cover, his fingertips brushing against yours as he takes the phone. “...who hid his soul inside a needle, hidden in an egg, within a duck, within a hare, which is in a chest, buried under an oak tree on the island of Buyan.”

  “Yes. The very same. But it follows his young bride Marya Morevna and it is...” you say wistfully, your heart feeling full as you remember each stunning line. “It is like dreaming a glorious dream, Spencer, drenched in tradition and unapologetic with its descriptions. It’s grotesque as it is beautiful, with gnarled hands and fiery blazes.”

  He glances at you, a goofy smile on his face. “You love it that much?”

  “More than I’ve loved anything else lately,” you dreamily sigh. “Finding a good book is much like falling in love again.” He hands back your phone. “You should read it. And take your time.  Read slow, soak up every word”

  “You want me, of all people, to read slower?”

  “I want you, of all people, to feel like you’re in a good dream. To sit there in a world someone created and absorb every moment. Anyone can read fast, Spence, but it takes discipline to read carefully. Don’t tell me that big brain of yours can’t create an intricate world?

  Spencer hums. “My imagination is...not as detailed as my memory,” he confesses. “It’s more like impressions compared to the visceral things I recall.”

  You lean back in your chair, your fingers tapping on your phone. “That’s okay, as long as you enjoy it. Make them good impressions. See something beautiful, however you define it.”

  “Okay, I love to read, but even that sounds too romantic.”

  “Be romantic, Spencer,” you say, tapping his shoe with yours.  “Life is more fun this way. Gooey and cute.”

  He wrinkles his nose, humor etched in his expression. “I’ll think about it.”

- 

Later that night as you’re brewing a cup of tea, your phone buzzes with a new text message.

  You are right. Being romantic is a little fun.

  Did you like it?

  I’m going to send a copy to my mother.

  So, you loved it :D

  Yes. The rhythmic repetition, how food is revered as if gold, the way the idea that physical act of living is so painful while death more muted. The mixing of magic and not. It really was beautiful.  Thank you for the recommendation.

  I’m known to have a few good ones now and then.

  Now, if only you’d actual give War and Peace a try you’d see that you would like it just as much.

  Never! TOO MUCH COMMITMENT.

  (But of course, he doesn’t know it yet, but you are reading War and Peace , just very slowly.)

-

  No matter the time of year, California heat greets you with a searing, passionate kiss as you make yourself outside of Bob Hope Airport. You’re home for a three-day weekend, going to wine and dine your mother in celebration of her healthy life.

  You spot her before she sees you and run towards her like you’ve done thousands of times before. This time, you’re the the bigger and strong one; you scoop her up in your arms. Her embrace is warm and she smells exactly the same, like childhood and comfort all in her small frame.

  “I’ve missed you so much,” she says.

  “I’ve missed you too, Mom. So, so much.”

  California traffic is like an old-toxic high school friend—somehow all you can ever talk about, but never changing for the better. But you don’t care as you drive home to the middle of nowhere. Your mom and your aunt bought some land in farm country. The new house isn’t the same one that you knew as you were a child, but it feels good to look up stars in the sky that aren’t airplanes or streetlights.

  “I’m so glad that you’re home,” Mom says as you pull into the driveway.

  You smile at her, watching as your cousins peek from the front door.

  “Me too.”

  “Next time you should bring a boy,” she winks.

  “Mother!”

  (Home is where the heart is and you’re just happy you carry yours with you.)

-

You take a sledgehammer and pound it into the wall. Tugging it out, you see there is a sizeable dent in the plaster and you grin, sweat cooling your face as you lift it and swing it again. You’re like a metronome, constantly hitting with even timing, the sound of the wall breaking music to your ears.

  You’ve been here for a few hours, helping Derek demo a house he plans on fixing up. You wanted to learn some hands on handyman things and he offered immediately. Plus, destroying stuff is a lot of fun. Not that you actively destroy stuff, but it’s hard not to pretend to be some robust viking alien creature hell bent on decementing the Earth.

  You hear a low whistle after your last smash and there is Derek standing in the doorway with a bottle of cold water. You breathe a small word of thanks before happily taking a soothing swig.

  “Look at you go, Sunny Girl. You don’t look like much, but even I gotta admit you pack a real punch.”

  You stick out tongue out at him. “I’m my mother’s only child so I have to be her daughter and  son.”

  “How’s she doing anyway?”

  You wipe your forehead with the back of your hand. “She’s good. Her treatments went really well and her doctor says it looks like she’s in a state of remission. We’re just lucky we caught it so early or things could have been a lot worse.”

  “That’s great to hear!” he smiles. “I hope she can finally come out to visit soon.”

  Derek Morgan’s smile is such a sight behold. It’s warm and kind and you feel safer knowing he’s in your corner. His well-wishes and good attitude brighten your days beyond compare and you know exactly why he’s so important to Penelope. He’s just so—effervescent and wonderful to be around.

  “Thanks, dude. And thank you for teaching me how to demo today too. I mean, it’s always the best parts of the HGTV shows and it’s kinda fun that I got to do it with such a rad person.”

  He laughs, deep and rich from his belly. “Consider yourself lucky,” he jokingly warns. “Not everyone is allowed to come to the properties, but you’re a quick learner. And dang girl, I never want piss you off if here is a sledgehammer hanging around!” he exclaims as he points at the now mostly damaged wall. “Look at this! You’re just going to town in here.”

  You giggle. “Teehee. What can I say? You just gotta grab the bull by the balls.”

  The room falls silent as you both realize what you both said. You sputter and start to shout.

  “By the horns, I meant by the horns!”

  It’s useless over Derek’s loud laughter, vowing to never let you forget this.

  Despite blushing madly and feeling extremely embarrassed, this day has already been perfect. You’re slowly spreading your limbs, creating friendships with the team on your own. It’s wonderful. To spend time with people one-on-one. You’ve been lonely for so long.

  “So, I gotta know: are you seeing anyone?”

  You snap your attention back to him and scoff. “Did Penelope put you up to this?”

  “My Baby Girl might have mentioned that you’re not seeing anyone and well, I think that’s crazy. You’re young. Enjoy life. Have fun!”

  Your lips twist and you shake your head. “I don’t know...I don’t think I’m ready right now. I was with Matthew for a long time and now...I’m not.”

  “But you haven’t been for how long? Like almost over a year, right?”

  “About a year or so, yeah. I thought he and I were going to start a life together. Get married, have two point five kids together while saving the world. But he’s in California and I’m here so. That didn’t happen.”

  Bitterness sits in your ribcage, reminding you of broken promises. Of the life you’ll never get to have with the man who no longer exists.

  “Would you want to get back together with him?”

  “I mean, a part of me will always love him. He was this bright innocent kid when we started college. And so, so smart. He really is intelligent.”

  Derek smirks. “Reid is intelligent.”

  You roll your eyes. “Reid is emotionally unavailable and I don’t need to be a profiler to guess what you’re gonna say next.”

  (You hope he doesn’t say it next. This is the one thing you don’t allow yourself to think about except in special situations.)

  Derek puts his hands up. “Hey, wasn’t it you who said he was intimidating and awe-inspiring. And oh yes, my favorite bit, when you first met our resident genius, you called him gorgeous? Wasn’t that you or some other little adorable short stack?”

  “Well, yes,” you say, a seething smile on your face. “That was me, but just because Spencer is objectively attractive, doesn’t mean that I’m actually attracted to him. He’s a co-worker and a friend.” Derek scoffs in disbelief. “What? I can find people attractive! Ben Stiller’s cute!

  “What? No. That’s terrible,” he chides. “Ben Stiller? Really. Ben Stiller? C’mon, if you’re going down the celebrity route, pick a better one.”

  “What! He has cute ears. Okay, George Clooney.”

  “Everyone thinks Clooney is hot. I think Clooney is hot.”

  “Alright fine. Garrett Borns.”

  “Who?”

  “Google him.”

  Derek does and his face breaks out in a shit-eating grin. “Oh my god. He looks almost like Reid. This is great. Is this your type? Tall and skinny?”

  “No, my type is quirky, intelligent, and…tall,” you mumble.

  “So, Reid.”

  “And Mattie! Looks nothing like Reid by the way. He’s tall, but he’s Indian, really buff, and might actually have a British accent,” you blush.

  “I promise if you admit you’re attracted to Reid, I will stop bothering you about it.”

  You stomp your foot. “You’re annoying, you know that? Fine, yes. Spencer Reid is very attractive in my books. There. Happy?”

  Derek comes over and pats the top of your head. “Very.”

- 

Winter leaves you less cold this year, your heart warm from extra cheer. Your mom comes to visit in excellent health. You exchange presents with your co-workers and everything seems like it’s going according to plan.

  Your heart is a little empty, wanting to sip something sweet, but you can’t fault that there is progress in friendships that nestle in the soil under your feet. You have a family away from your family, a place to call home when you feel weary.

  Midnight strikes and you leave kisses on everyone’s cheek, promising another sweet year with them.

- 

There are days when cases happen right in the heart of D.C. and your heart sinks when come across somber faces in the bullpen. Never has you worked such massive overtime, assisting Garcia with analyst duties as her back-up. You don't bother wearing makeup when your skin feels so dehydrated and the purple under your eyes a new permanent feature of your face.

  It is also the rare moment the team takes a small break to eat breakfast when Rossi grins at you.

  “So, a little birdie told me that you said Reid is attractive.”

  Spencer, bless him, chokes on his food. You, on the other hand, almost spit out your coffee.

  Quickly, you turn towards the culprit and kick Derrek under the table. “You’re a snitch.”

  Penelope plops down beside you and steals a piece of fruit off your plate. “Technically I was the snitch.”

  “Wow. Et tu, Brute? Betrayed. Be-trayed.” You pout and stab a piece of bacon.

  Penelope leans her head on your shoulder. “I love you.”

  You playfully push her. Across the table, Spencer is beet red and you feel your face pain with a blush of your own. You clear your throat. “Well, to be fair, I think everyone on the team is super attractive. I mean, have you all looked in the mirror lately?”

  Derek teases. “Nice save, princess, but I know what my ears heard.”

  You glare at him. “Yeah, well, I thought what’s said at demo house stays in demo house, but look where we are now. But yeah, I do think Spencer is attractive…I guess.”

  J.J. laughs, clearly enjoying this situation far more than you realized. “You guess? My memory might not be as good at Spence’s, but I will not forget the day Spencer came super dazed to the office because this pretty girl dressed in purple called him gorgeous. I did not see or hear any brain activity for hours.”

  You laugh, partly due to embarrassment, partly due to surprise. “Oh my god, you thought I was pretty? That’s precious!” You place your hand under your chin, posing cutely. “You’re not wrong though!”

  (You ignore the way your heart is speeding up. If you keep making jokes, hopefully things will go back to normal.)

  Spencer carefully takes a sip of coffee, avoiding making eye contact with you. “I mean, yeah. You were pretty. All dressed up for your first day of work…” he hums. “It was cute.”  

  “Okay, but our Little Miss Sunshine here is also leaving out she finds Ben Stiller attractive,” Derek taunts. “Ben Stiller. And a Reid doppelganger.”

  You kick him again under the table before glaring at your other co-worker. “Rossi, look what you’ve done. I thought we have an unsub to catch and yet here we are talking about who I find attractive. This is how we’re spending the American tax dollars?”

  “What can I say, kiddo?” he says with a soft chuckle. “Though, Garcia did say your ex was a good-looking guy.” His eyes twinkling with curiosity.

  You sigh in defeat and grab your phone. “Such nosey profilers, I swear,” you mutter.

  “That’s why we’re so good at our job.”

  You look up Matt’s instagram and you still when you see the first picture. It’s your ex-boyfriend with a very beautiful woman, long blonde hair and perfect white teeth. You bite the inside of your cheek and swipe to the next one, thankful there’s no company in this one.

  You show the team your phone, a picture of Matthew shirtless on the beach with a surfboard at his side. He’s toned and bronzed, his black hair tousled perfectly atop his head. He’s definitely been hitting the gym, his arms and six pack looking good.

  (You definitely hope he still feels miserable and cries himself to sleep at night.)

  J.J. lets out a low whistle. “I thought he was supposed to be quirky, not a Calvin Klein model.”

  You laugh. “He has his moments.”

  Derek looks down at his arms for a moment, his little moment of insecurity a wonderful taste of revenge. “I take back making fun of you for Ben Stiller. Geez, do all your ex-boyfriends look that good?”

  “One looks like a mountain man now, I think; however, I’ll be sure to parade whatever new guy I end up dating next to get your seal of approval,” you say with a huff.

  Spencer wears an unreadable expression. “Well, we’d only think about your safety.”

  J.J. giggles at his side, but before you can question anything, Hotch enters the room and before you know it, you’re all back to the grind.

-

Thankfully, the case ends two days later on a happy note. You’re free to have a few days off much to your relief. Freedom will only be yours if you can get to your car fast enough. Most the the team has already gone home for the day, so you find yourself alone at the elevator, waiting to go down.

  Or, rather you think you’re alone. Spencer appears are your side, a little winded, but softly grins.

  “I’m so glad we can go home,” he says, engaging in small talk.

  Spencer doesn’t do regular small talk. His form of small talk is spewing fun facts and hoping to make the other person laugh. What in the world?

  You cast him a sidelong glance, unsure where this is leading. “I just want waffles and cup of coffee.”

  He takes a deep breath. “...do you mind if I join you and—”

  “And give you a ride home?” you continue, wanting to follow this rabbit hole.

  “Please?”

-

You end up in a diner not far from the office. It’s quaint with old booths and even older waitresses. You love how shabby it looks. You order coffee and waffles while Spencer does the same.

  The car ride over was quiet, but now that you’re seated at a booth, you break the silence. “While I don’t mind the extra company, what’s on your mind?”

  “Nothing is on my mind,” he says quickly, ignoring your curious stare, he plays with the sugar. “I just want to spend time with my friend.”

  “Spencer.”

  He peeks at you, his face wincing. “Was I that obvious?”

  “A bit. Mainly because we both live in opposite directions from work and while I usually am a helpful person, I’m like literally the last person you’d ask to drive you home since it’s so out of my way and you are a polite person.”

  “...okay, that is all true, but—”

  “No buts, just what’s on your mind, bud? I feel like we’re about to get extra deep up in here.”

  Spencer taps his fingers against the wooden table. You watch as he forces himself to commit to this. “I don’t know about extra deep, but yeah, my reason is personal, if that’s okay.”

  “Just ask and we shall see. I’m sure it’s fine.”

  He takes his time, thinking carefully before speaking. “I just. I know you were with Matt for a long time and just…how do you know that you’re ready to move on? I thought you were planning to have a life with him and everything.”

  Oh. Well.

  This was not what you were expecting.

“Okay, um. Well, this isn’t the first time my heart has been broken,” you start to explain, “so I have that going for me. And yes, I originally wanted to be lifelong partners with Matt, but I understood why we didn’t work out,” you say, your words rushed and weird. “First of all, a nation was between us. Second, our goals didn’t match. And third, we changed in ways that no longer parallel each other.”

  You mark each point with a new finger. You list them as facts, the pain of saying them out loud barely there now.

  He’s quiet again, your reasons hanging between you two. “And do you think you’re ready to move on?”

  “Are you asking for my well being or for your own?”

  Spencer sucks in a breath of air and you wait as he thinks of an answer. You try to eat, but your waffle isn’t as good as you remembered it being. Everything feels kinda cold.

  “Despite losing Maeve,” he says, and you know this will not be an easy conversation. “We were only together for one hundred days give or take...and I never even held her hand, but the idea of moving on from her hurts.”

  You press your lips together and lean into the booth, trying to string something positive and encouraging to say to him, but you only have one though.

  “Then don’t move on.”

  “C’mon,” he scoffs, “even I know that’s not completely healthy.”

  “I don’t know, Spencer. I have a great-aunt whose husband died while saving his daughter and it’s been over thirty years and she hasn’t dated anyone since. That was the love of her life, as she was the love of your life. It’s just like that sometimes.”

  “Yeah, she was—but I don’t know. This is the one thing I don’t know no matter how many times I try to reason it out. Just because she’s not here doesn’t mean I need to stop living...”

  “Emotions aren’t rational, Spencer. If you don’t feel ready, you don’t feel ready. Our situations are totally different anyway. See, for me, the things I miss the most aren’t Matt. Matt can go fuck himself, but the things we did together? The way I felt? That’s what I want.”

  “What do you mean?”

  You play with a ring on your finger, needing to fidget as you open up your heart. “I miss...the security of knowing someone would always be there. I miss the dates we would go on. I miss holding hands and falling asleep to one person. I miss hugs and kisses and—just everything that makes up a relationship. Unlike you, I don’t miss a person. I miss a sequence of actions. Totally different.”

  “Missing a sequence of actions does sound a lot better, I guess, if you have any to remember,” he says quietly, almost as if he’s confessing something he doesn’t say often.

  Your heart aches for him. “You really never even met her once?”

  “No.”

  “Not even for a date?”

  He shakes his head.

  And the rest of the world goes on as normal, as if you didn’t just hear the most heart shattering thing.  The diner is still somewhat noisy in the mid-morning. A kid is laughing, a waitress is calling out orders to the kitchen, and a fork clatters to the ground, but you’re stuck processing this confirmation, your heart twisting with every moment.

  “I apologize for the lack of filter, but holy fuck, Spencer. That shit is tragic. Like I can’t even comprehend.” You bring your hand to your mouth, wanting to cover up all the pity that’s resting on your tongue. So, you choose not to say it. “I’m sorry that that happened. And that sucks and I don’t know anything else to say, but you’re totally allowed to be hung up on this. I would be so, so, so hung up on this! Actually, I think I am getting hung up on this for you right now!”

  He lets out a weak laugh. “Thank you. I think you’re the first person who told me it’s okay to not move on. I... I don’t really talk about her to...anyone, but it’s kinda easier with you. You don’t make me feel like I’m obligated to feel a certain way about it. I feel less stupid about it, I guess. It was a just a mess, from start to finish.”

  “Yeah, but who cares, it was your mess and no one can take that away from you. And it might be the romantic in me, but your relationship with her, the bits I do know, like the letters and your meet cute is rather...cute. It sounds like there is more good than bad.”

  “I like to think there was,” he says, pushing his food on his plate.

  You set your fork down and lean back into your seat. You don’t need to be a profiler to see exactly what Spencer is feeling or thinking. But most importantly, you know your friend needs you and you refuse him to continue now this road alone.

  And then an idea strikes you like lightning. Brilliant and bright, coursing delight through you as see everything coming together in your mind.

  “You know what,” you start, confidence in your voice. “We’re gonna do something fun. How good are you with spontaneity?”

  “Uh, pretty good considering my job.”

  You grin and link your fingers together. “Perfect. Okay, so tomorrow you and I are going to go an amusement park for funsies.”

  Spencer’s mouth twists. “...funsies?”

  “Yes, funsies. You desperately need it. So, dress down,” you order. “Comfy shoes and jeans please.”

  “Um.”

  “And you can’t say no because I’m doing you a huge favor by going super out of my way to drive you home as you told me a sad story over breakfast. And I’ve been dying to go anyway, so there’s that,” you finish saying in a rush.

  You might have presented your case more childlike than intended, but Spencer seems to take be taking it into consideration. That is a victory in itself.  

  After a few moments, Spencer nods his head. “Okay. But there’s one problem.”

  “What?”

  “I don’t own any jeans.”

  (You do your best not to face palm.)

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #137

“if i could kill you, i would, but it’s frowned upon in all 50 states.”

Who was the last person that borrowed money from you?
  Mom. Think of the person you fell hardest for. How many people has he/she been in love with, besides you?
  One. Do you have any 70s, 80s or 90s music on your iPod?
  Plenty. If you had 5 minutes to talk with any politician, who would it be?  I don't have the desire to talk to any, really. What would you ask them?  N/A You’re stranded alongside the road. Who do you call first?  Mom. Name 3 things from your childhood that you still have today:  Lots of video games, love for animals, and tons of stuffed animals. Ever yell at someone for not washing their hands after using the bathroom?  Not "yell," no. When is the last time you danced?  ahhhHHhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHH one night when Sara was here and we were outside listening to music. Someone breaks into your house while you are in bed. What do you do?  Probably grab my phone, jump out my window, try to get to a neighbor, and call 911. How did you first learn your “limit” when drinking?  I don't know what that is for me. Who is the one person you DON’T want to come to your wedding?  I was gonna say Jason but tbh the asshole in me says I'd love him to see how happy I am without him lmao.  I don't really know one specific person I wouldn't want to come...  Maybe a massively homophobic friend or family member who can't keep their mouth shut, considering it's probably gonna be a same-sex wedding? Have you ever been to an ocean and, if so, which one? The Atlantic. What’s your favorite sea creature? Hmmm.  Seahorses or whales, maybe? Which of your exes has your parents disliked?  I barely consider Juan an ex, but Mom didn't like him.  She liked Jason until the breakup and she saw how much he'd changed. What’re your uncles’ names? I only know Rob and Billy off the top of my head... but those actually might be the only two?  I know Dad doesn't have a brother, and I think those are Mom's only bros. What’s your favorite forest animal? Deer. If you met a genie, what would be your three wishes? World peace, end disease, end to poverty/homelessness. Have you ever been pressured to get married? No. Do you agree with traditional male and female roles?  *maniacal laughter* Were you raised by someone other than your parents? No. Who’s your favorite wizard? Uhhhh idk. Has your mother ever been in jail?  No. What were you teased for when you were a kid?  I wasn't really teased for it, but I remember a lot of kids thinking I in general was weird, like my interests and stuff.  My AvPD ass can legit still remember some "she's strange" scenarios from fucking kindergarten. Have you ever been hunting? No. What’s your favorite story from Greek mythology?  Uhhhh.  I don't remember. If you were turned into a god or goddess, what would you be the god or goddess of?  Peace. Have you taken shrooms or acid?  No. Have you ever been to Times Square to watch the ball drop for the New Year?  No. Have you ever made a time capsule?  No. What is one good thing you do for your health? I've been doing an intermittent fast.  Drinking mostly water. Do you know any illegal immigrants?  I knew one, but he got deported. Do you have any cavities?  I currently have one, but we can't afford to fill it atm.  It's not major, thankfully. What is the most you have ever weighed?  Like 270 and I'm super proud to say I've lost a shitload. Have you ever received anesthesia or morphine?  Both.  The one time I received morphine, it didn't do shit. If you had to choose which video game to be in, which would it be?  World of Warcraft's universe to be a beast mastery hunter.  Heaveeeen. Between the two, would you rather live in a place where it’s only night or where it’s only day?  Only day.  It's natural to humans.  Plus it being dark constantly would affect my mood. In your opinion, does the world make people cruel or do people make the world cruel?  Both. Out of fire, earth, water, wind, light, and dark, which element appeals the most to you?  Dark. Do you usually have to make yourself get over someone or does it just happen naturally?  It's both, but mostly it's a natural process.  But you have to want it. Would you rather spend your evening at the circus, at the movie theater, or at a drama play?  Movie theater. What music band/singer has inspired you the most to follow your dreams and be yourself? Why?  Otep.  Her lyrics are passionate as fuck and deeply encourage people to stand up for what they believe in and never fear standing out. What is your sexuality? If you aren’t straight, when did you realize it? Was it hard?  I "knew" I was bi in the 8th grade, but because of religious beliefs I had back then, I forced myself into believing it was my anxiety making me worry I was.  I had a crisis over it for like a week, but finally made myself accept I was straight.  Didn't question it again until last year, when it was honestly a very easy thing to accept.  Looking back through middle, high school, and years beyond, I had definitely been sexually attracted to women. Do you ever wear lipstick? What color(s) do you prefer?  Veeeery rarely, and black. Which word(s) do you generally use to describe someone attractive? (e.g. “fit”, “sexy”)  I usually say "hot" in regards to strangers, but "beautiful" or "gorgeous" is more common when I'm speaking of females. Would you consider yourself an adventurous person?  Eh... not really. Have you ever been afraid of being underwater?  No. Would you ever scuba dive in shark-infested waters if you had the chance?  No. Have you ever slept on the floor with someone you like?  Yeah. Have you ever read any of the Chicken Soup for the Soul books?  No. Have you ever sneaked someone over to your house?  No. How many tattoos would you get?  A LOT.  My right arm's gonna be covered, left one too probably, back, hands, ribs, hip, maybe neck...  I want so many okay. Who do you go to for advice the most?  Mom or Sara. Is there a person you talk to everyday with?  Sara and Mom. Does one of your parents ever complain to you about the other parent? ��HA.  Mom's good at that. When you move out your house (or if you already have moved out) do you plan on still visiting your parents' house?  Definitely. Do you usually take home leftovers if you eat out in a restaurant?  No.  I pretty much always finish. Do you wish on 11:11?  No. Do you think you could ever have an abortion if you unexpectedly turned up pregnant right this second?  I honestly don't know.  If my life was at risk, yes, but even if it wasn't, I truly do believe pregnancy could be traumatizing for me.  I'd have to be in this situation to really know. If you were far from home and needed to sleep for the night, would you choose to rent a crappy motel room for $60 or sleep in your car for free?  Sleep in the car. If you could see any musician live, front row, who would you choose?  OZZY. What's the next movie you want to see in theaters?  The new Jurassic World movie. Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?  Yeah. Think back to the last person you held hands with, would you kiss them?  I have and I will a billion times more. Have you ever fainted? If so, when was the last time? If not, have you ever came close to?  Yes, and like... 2012/2013? Did you ever breathe in helium and talk funny afterwards?  Maybe I have? Ever meet and talk to someone from an online dating site?  No. Did you decorate your house for Halloween? If so, how many decorations? Did you go all out or just put up a few things? We didn't last year and we probably won't this year.  We don't have many decorations.  When I've got my own place?  Oh, HALLOWEENTOWN. Which type of Halloween costume do you prefer, sexy ones or scary ones? Or maybe funny ones?  Well-executed scary yet beautiful ones. Do you like cranberry sauce? NONONONONONONONONO. Do you have the right time set on your microwave?  Yes. Do you like Slim Jim’s?  OH BOY- Are there any plants in your house? No.

[jaybeartodd]

Colleagues Pt. 8/17 -- Jason Todd x fem. reader

Warnings: none

Word Count: 1821

Tags: @sarcasmismyfirstlove @tsctd

A/N: This was fun! I really hope you guys like it :) Also, I have been considering doing one-shots and all that jazz between these parts. So if you guys have any requests or anything feel free to send them in! I am in school though so please have great patience with me. Anyways, love you guys!! Enjoy!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17

“Wow,” Trey exclaims.

Wow was right. The Wayne Manor had seemingly rebuilt itself after the ball and returned to its former glory.

You turn yourself around in the front seat to look at Trey and Nick. Trey has his face plastered against the window. Hope Jason doesn’t mind a few smudges. Nick is looking out the window too barely masking his pain with curiosity. You make a mental note to give him his pain medication before turning back around.

You sneak a glance at Jason in the driver’s seat. His dark hair is in its natural state of a perfect mess and his muscular arms stretch out of his red t-shirt as he grips the steering wheel. His face conveys no emotion except for maybe content. He turns towards you and gives a soft reassuring smile calming your nerves immediately. You blush and tuck a piece of hair behind your ear before you refocus your attention on the mansion.

Jason parks the car by the front entrance and everyone scrambles out. You take a deep breath, not entirely prepared to see the place that has been haunting your nightmares, before following suit.

The older man that had been taking names at the ball exits the house and walks towards you. Behind him is Mr. Wayne, a teenage boy, and a very disgruntled kid that looked to be about 10 years old. That must be the son Mr. Wayne had mentioned.

"Hello Y/N. Nice to see you again. I am Alfred,” the kind gentleman says stretching out a hand. You smile and return the handshake.

"It is nice to officially meet you Alfred. Thank you all for letting us stay.” Trey runs up to you and hides behind your leg, “And this is Trey, my nephew.”

“This is Tim and Damian,” Bruce says pointing to the boys next to him.

Damian responds with a sound that can only be described as tt. Charming. Tim just gives a shy smile. You notice the dark circles under his eyes and his hair looks like he just woke up.

Your head turns when you hear Jason retrieving Nick’s temporary wheelchair from the trunk.

“Trey, I made some snacks for you. I heard you like cookies. Is that true?” Alfred asks. Trey looks up at you and you nod. He takes Alfred’s hand and you watch their retreating figures.

You help Jason get Nick into the wheelchair while the rest of the men grab the bags.

“We put you both in rooms on the first floor to make it easier. There is an elevator that accesses the other floors if need be,”

"Thank you Mr. Wayne.”

”Bruce, please,” he says and you nod. You wheel Nick into the designated room which is easily as large as your entire apartment. 

“Dinner is at five. Feel free to freshen up and join us,” Bruce says warmly and you thank him.

Everyone exits except Jason.

“I am in a room upstairs if you need anything,”

“Thanks Jay. It means a lot,” he smiles at the nickname.

“Of course Dopey,” you roll your eyes and he laughs as he leaves the room.

After taking care of Nick, you take off to your own room. You haven’t been able to say that in a while. And of course when presented with a bed for the first time since moving in with Nick, you immediately pass out onto it.

You awake to commotion outside of your door. Your phone reads quarter til 5 so you shoot out of bed. You pat your hair down to tame it as much as possible and straighten your clothes to at least resemble someone who is not a mess.

Exiting the room you hear shouting.

“Who invited him?” Jason’s familiar voice booms. You follow the voices into what appears to be the dining room.

“Easy Jay, I wouldn’t miss meeting her for the world,” a deep mocking voice returns. You enter the dining room to see Trey and Nick sitting at the table with Damian and Tim. Standing at the head of the table is Jason fuming at a man several inches shorter than him with slick black hair and a muscular build. He turns towards you and gives a winning smile. Damn, this man is attractive.

“You must be Y/N!” he says delighted and walks up to you. You are taken aback when he hugs you tightly. He lets go with the smile still lighting up his face.

“Oh, I’m Dick. Jason’s older and more clever and all-around better brother,” he says smirking. Jason scoffs.

“Similar egos I see,” you say and he breaks into laughter. 

“Jaybird over here has told me a lot about you. You are definitely as charming and beautiful as he described,”

You blush and look at Jay to see him less than happy with this exchange. 

“Alright Prince Charming, can we eat or are you trying to make me throw up before the meal?” Jason says bitterly. 

Bruce arrives and the dinner commences. You eat so much you feel like you are going to burst. It is definitely a far cry from the usual take-out or microwaveable dinner you are used to. 

Nick is obviously uncomfortable at first but then he and Jason start talking about motorcycles which really opens him up. Glad someone in the family enjoys them. Trey is scarfing down the food so fast Nick is consistently reminding him to have manners. You talk to Bruce about work for a little while and then you fall into conversation with Dick about his work in the police force.

Overall, the dinner is delicious and the company is a tremendously helpful distraction from the dogpile of problems plaguing you. 

“Well, I better be heading out. It was really nice meeting you all,” Dick says standing from the table. He leans down and whispers in your ear, “And take care of Jason. He’s fragile.”

You giggle. Jason’s eyes narrow. “Dick better be ready for our next patrol together” Jason thinks.

Everyone bids good night to each other and you grab Nick’s wheelchair to help him into his room. 

“Come on Trey, you need to get ready for bed too,” Nick says and a pouting Trey follows you into Nick’s room. 

You get Nick cleaned up and in bed with Trey’s help. Trey’s room is upstairs so you follow behind his energetic figure towards his room. The house seems unusually quiet but you are way too tired to think too much of it. Looks like that power nap just reminded you how great sleep is.

You manage to wiggle Trey into his pajamas as he dances around the room. 

“T, you really need to chill out and go to sleep. The mansion will still be here when you wake up, I promise.” you say stifling a yawn. 

“And I can't have you playing with my knives if you are tired. It’s a safety hazard,” Jason says leaning in the doorway with his bulky arms crossed over his chest. 

Trey’s eyes widen and he jumps into bed. Who knew bribing with knives could be such an effective parenting tool?

You tuck Trey in and give him a smooch despite his protests. 

“Night Trey,” Jason says with a small wave as you turn off the lights and exit the room with him in tow. 

You rub the exhaustion from your eyes.

“You game for staying up just a little bit longer?” he asks and you look at him curiously. 

“Depends,” you say cautiously. 

“I want to show you something.” you look skeptical,” I promise it’s worth it.” 

You can't resist his eagerness and nod your head. This makes him beam and he signals for you to follow him.

You trail behind as he winds down the endless hallways. He stops at a door and turns the knob. He looks at you sheepishly.

“Now I couldn't help but notice all of the books in your apartment and I thought maybe we shared,” he opens the door and your breath leaves you at the sight,” the same love for literature.”

“This is,” you struggle to find a word to describe the enormous library you are currently standing in the middle of,” amazing.”

You look at him to see him staring, satisfied at your reaction. 

“I even have a favorite reading spot. Wanna see?” he says giddily like a child. You laugh and let him grab your hand pulling you towards his nook. It is a window seat lined with a couch and a perfect view of the garden. You almost laugh at its picturesque perfection.

You sit down and lean back with your legs tucked to your chest completely taken with the view. Jason sits next your feet.

“This is absolutely beautiful Jay,” you say and he looks at you with a sparkle in his eye. 

“It really is.” he looks at you for a moment longer before clearing his throat and looking out the window. “I thought you could use a view after being stuck in the hospital all week. And it's also a fantastic hideout from your worries.” 

His eyes grow a little distant. You sit up on your knees and caress his cheek. He slowly turns his face towards yours. Your heart begins to beat faster as his eyes drop down to your lips. Before you can overthink it you lean in and press your lips against his. He pulls you closer and your mouths fall into sync. 

You finally pull back and he gives a lazy smile, “About time.” You laugh and kiss him again. The hesitant part of you finally disappears and is replaced with a happiness you don't recognize but never want to let go. 

After awhile you break the kiss. Somehow he had ended up with his legs sprawled out underneath and you were holding yourself up with your arms on either side of him.

“You should get some sleep,” he says, his voice husky. You nod and rest your head on his chest.

“Yeah, I should definitely go to bed,” you say yawning, your previous exhaustion finally creeping back in. Your heartrate slows down significantly after the adrenaline subsides and you feel more relaxed than you have in ages. The feeling of his chest rising and falling with each breath starts to lull you into sleep.. Your eyelids begin to droop until you surrender against the sleepless week you've had and let your eyes fall shut.

“Alright Doll. Let's actually get you to bed,” Jason laughs and you mumble incoherently. You vaguely feel him swing his arms beneath your legs and lift you in a fluid motion. 

Before you know it you're being placed on a bed and he throws the covers over you.

“Night Dopey,” he whispers and you want to chastise him for the horrid nickname but you fall into unconsciousness. Leave the second-guessing and complete freak out over what just happened for another time. 

[duallygirl178]

Dearest O'Malley chapter 22

Chapter 22

Today was Robin’s birthday, I was talking to Gonzo and Robin about what we should do. Robin wanted a sleepover, with playing card games. Sweetie-Pie was still not back yet and I wondered why not pass the time by celebrating a dear friend's birthday. Natalie was making us some honey barbeque wings since that was Robin's favorite food. While she was making that, we played a card game and drank coffee. Gonzo taught us how to play poker since the two of us never played before. I started to get the hang of it and I planned my cards wisely with long thoughts. I was doing good and beating Gonzo and Robin but then, I decided this game was too advanced for my smarts so I let Robin win by placing the wrong cards down.

When the wings were ready, Natalie served us and told us that she and Nathan were going out to eat. So they drove Ol Reliable to Denny's. While they were gone, we played rummy for a while. We soon grew bored of the card game and decided to watch some NETFLIX and we searched for something good to watch when we found a bunch of our old favorites from many years ago to our favorite TV shows. We all took a vote on what we wanted to watch. I scrolled down the list with the remote and I hear Robin exclaim in joy when he saw the title SUPERNATURAL. He nearly hit the wall screaming out "Oh my chrome! I love this show!"

I laughed and picked that show.

"We're watching this." I said.

I clicked on the title and it played SUPERNATURAL. Robin had his eyes glued for one reason...because of that 1967 Chevy Impala. We ended up watching 6 episodes in a row. Robin was jumping for joy on the couch and teasing the characters on a few parts that appeared to come up at random times. Gonzo started to tease too about how he would like to rock her roads. Then I started to tease it too.

"She looks like a fun ride to take down the road." I said.

Than, Gonzo started to give me a hard time about having a thing for four door Impala cars.

"If only Sweetie-Pie was that attractive." Gonzo teased playfully.

"Yeah right." I chuckled "I wouldn't want her near those ghosts and monsters."

Robin and Gonzo chuckled and kept watching. It took 15 minutes before we started talking and joking until season 2 of SUPERNATURAL.

We watched a few more episodes until season 3 and went silent to follow the storylines. By the time we got bored, we played a that Gonzo brought over. When Nathan and Natalie got back from their date, Natalie got busy baking a cake for Robin for his birthday. The second card game didn't go so well but after 10 minutes, the game got good. By the time the cake was done and frosted, Natalie served us each a slice of cake while we watched a "Dukes Of Hazzard" movie that we found on NETFLIX. We ate our cake and wished Robin a happy birthday. After a while, Gonzo and I watched a 1980s TV show that I've never seen before .Robin was passed out and sleeping. We happened to come across it on the stream of movies and Tv shows. I looked at Gonzo and whispered to him about Robin. Gonzo gently shook him but Robin was sound asleep for a while and woke up.

"What I miss?" Robin asked almost alarmed.

"You missed Christmas." I said sarcastically

"I fell asleep, good gravy O'Malley. What shot down your alley?" Robin asked.

Gonzo and I started laughing. Gonzo perked up and decide to tell a story about what Impa used to do.

"Remember when Impa flashed himself in front of all those girls on tour?" I asked laughing.

"Oh brother, that guide got so upset he was trying to threaten us." Gonzo said.

I laughed, just remembering made me crack up.

"What now?" Robin asked us.

I was laughing so hard that I could barely talk, "You tell him Gonzo-bean."

Gonzo told Robin when Impa was hanging out with Gonzo and I there were these model women being taken to their cabin just across the lake, Impa looks at us and says "hey boys, watch this." so he bends over and flashed the women in the boat going by. And all those women were taking pictures and whooping at him and what not. And I could see the tour man hollering at us and shaking the ore in his hands like "you better stop that" Then Gonzo was scolding at us and saying "what are you stupid fools doing? Impa you better stop that now, that's embarrassing. O'Malley stop laughing that's not funny." Well, I tried but it was just too embarrassing and funny. There was nothing more dandy than seeing a pair of car balls being hung in the breeze like a pair of fuzzy dice. Finally afterwards, Gonzo took us back to the rest stop where we hide from the cops for moonshining.

After Gonzo finished telling the story, Robin was laughing hard.

"were the women upset?" He asked us.

"Upset? Bah, those women were so delighted they were taking pictures." Gonzo said.

"I remember one of them was wolf whistling and another was calling out 'nice fuzzies' to Impa." I said chuckling.

"A women in the front was clapping like 'yeee-ah yeee-ahh' also. I was watching her do it." Gonzo said.

"Impa was full of crazy ideas, if you dared him to do wear...well, he'd do it. He wasn't afraid to prove anything." Gonzo said, best for himself to leave out the graphic parts.

We laughed until we couldn't eat another bite of cake. Robin had a story to tell and so he told us all about it. He thought he was alone one day and he had an emergency. As he was lowering down to the ground to leak, two women were coming and they saw him. Robin was so humiliated that he never did it again. But it was good to be open to tell our embarrassing stories. Robin and Gonzo asked me what was my most embarrassing story. I licked the top of my lip and thought. Then, I smiled to tell it.

"I was heading out with my masters one day to get fuel. The road was freshly paved and the smell was so delightful that I lowered my face to smell it and I ended up scraping my chin on the pavement. Natalie gasped and asked me if I was okay. I was alright, it didn't hurt but I did feel pretty high. So I didn't feel it scraped." I said remembering the time I scraped my chin.

They chuckled.

"When did you start sniffing pavement?" Robin asked teasing me a little.

"I didn't start but I like the smell of a freshly paved street." I said.

After a while, we started to get sleepy and dozing off in a middle of a story about Impa from Gonzo and I noticed about a few minutes ago, Natalie and Nathan were off to bed. Robin shared a story where that reminded him of something he did that was stupid of him. I almost wanted to tell them another story of my life but then I stopped and thought how stupid it would be if I shared. So I decided not to say it.

Gonzo and Robin both looked at me and asked; "What was the dumbest thing you ever did, O'Malley?"

There has been so many dumb things I did that I couldn't think of one. I snickered and finally told one.

"I remember one year when I was young there was this one time, I put this cherry bomb on the men's toilet at a movie theater and flushed it down." I was saying and I had to start laughing and once I calmed down, I finished my story. "That bomb exploded like a roach in a microwave and that poor toilet survived it with water spraying all over the place until the janitor could turn off the water. We didn't get caught and it was at night so no one could see us. Secrurity cameras weren't in use at the time because the stupid business didn't want to chuck out the $60 dollars to have them running and they had bills toppling over." Gonzo had this look on his face like he remembered something.

"Oh wait...I remember that now, yeah! It was you, me, and Impa and your cousin." Gonzo laughed. "Best night ever."

I remembered it all from the "how come" and "why" parts that happened that same night.

"Remember when we had to camp out in that corn feild after we dashed away because the cops were there and they missed us completely when they pulled in." Gonzo added remembering some more of that night.

"Yeah because the cops were searching everyone that was there on who did it and we got off Scott-free. The corn wsn't too bad raw though and I liked it so it wasn't bad hiding there until the morning." I said.

Robin lost his mind laughing. It was the greatest story he ever heard. He sighed to calm down and said; "Wow O'Malley, that was the best one I've heard all night. That's a winner of all funny stories. Good job, man. I'm proud of you"

Robin high-treaded me and I said; "Thank you."

Once we got out all our giggles, we went to bed. I had a guess that it was passed 3 in the morning. I felt a heavy feeling in my eyes that they were suddenly glued down. I was so tired and it was starting to shine with a ray of sunshine over the hills. I didn't want to look at the clock to see so I let myself doze off.

By the time it was 11 AM, the three of us woke up realizing we were asleep on top of each other. We woke up alarm-clock screaming at each other.

"whoa, I know I have no problem with gays but I'm not gay, you goddit?" I said.

"nor am I and I have no idea how I ended up on you." Gonzo said.

When we calmed down, we had a late brunch and hung out for a while with a cup of coffee before the two of them went home. Robin and Gonzo tanked me for having Robin's birthday celebration and they had a great time. Nathan watched SUPERNATURAL while Natalie did her sewing. I watched it with Nathan because I was an Impala guy and watched the show for the Chevy Impala. I was enjoying the episode when a surprise came to the door. It was Sweetie-Pie came over and Natalie let her in to see me. She had returned safe and sound from her trip. I was surprised and I asked her sweetly; "So how was your trip?"

Sweetie-Pie gasps in excitement and said it was great.

"I did a lot of things in Boulder, Colorado. I went to some café places, the museum visited the university and ate out at fancy places in town." She was saying. Sounded like she had fun. then, she told me this long story of what else she did and about an hour later, she asked me what did I do while she was gone. I just shrugged and just said with a short pause; "Oh...nothing."

She chuckled, gave me a kiss on the fender and I made us some coffee. She asked me again on what did I do. Finally, I decided to give her the truth.

"I celebrated Robin's birthday, dressed up and did impressions of Elvis Presley, Did you know in Graceland, Memphis, they celebrate National Elvis Presley day on August 9th thru the 17th? There was an actual sandwich he made with peanut butter, banana and bacon. He called it the Elvis sandwich. Isn't that weird?" I said.

Impressed with my knowledge about Elvis, she said; "Wow, you really know your Elvis Presley facts. did you do a video on how you did your impression?" Sweetie-Pie asked.

I told her all about the video as we logged in to Nathan's laptop, we searched for it online and found it. By clicking on it, we watched it closely. Sweetie-Pie was amazed on how good I looked decorated like an Elvis Presley mobile. She giggled at the video and asked; "Who recorded all this?"

"Robin did with his camera. We did it for all those King of rock and roll fans out there." I said.

Sweetie-Pie smiled at me and said; "You are so thoughtful." She kept watching and would chuckle at it. how old did you say Robin was" Sweetie-Pie asked.

I thought a second and remembered in a hurry.

"He's 59 years old. He's 7 years older than I am." I said.

I had to admit that Robin was reaching his 60s. I had an idea that would delight my day with joy. I brought Sweetie-Pie close to me and said; "Say toots, we should go for a stroll at Berg park today while it's nice out."

Sweetie-Pie giggled and said. "Sounds like a good idea, O'Malley."

In 20 minutes, I left the house with Sweetie-Pie and we went to the Berg park. There were some people out jogging, riding bikes and feeding ducks.

First, we stopped to feed the ducks and geese. Sweetie-Pie brought corn from the feed store and happened to have it with her. We watched them crowd up tot the food as it laid scattered. There were 5 ducks that waddled up to grab a bite to eat. Geese were joining in and it looked like a congregation of birds. When they starting to leave, the feed bag was about empty.

When they left, we headed down the wildlife trail and while we did, we saw some more people jogging with their music in their ears as well deer walking about. It was a nice day to go for a stroll. There was a few deer in the bushes that were looking at us. Then about an hour later, Sweetie-Pie and I went to her house to hang out. Sweetie-Pie's house was just up Pinion Hills Road and she lived a few houses down from Robin. We had some tea and cheese Danishes which her owners made. She showed me pictures she took a while back on her trip. Sweetie-Pie had pictures of which she was in town at a restaurant and mountains. There were pictures of sunsets. She told me she had gone to visit her brother and got pictures with him at the kitchen table. She told me her brother's name was Roy and lived in a rich neighborhood, almost as fancy as Robin's house. There were pictures of the backyard and garden. When I flipped to the next picture, there was a sunset where flowers grew. Something caught my eye and I looked at it very carefully. There was something weird in the background. It was behind the rose bushes and stood about 4 feet tall which had goggled on it's face in. To make sure I wasn't seeing things, I blinked and looked at it again. Sweetie-Pie was staring at me.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

I studied that picture again and said; "Take a look see.at it. There is someone or something. in the background. I've never seen anything like it."

Sweetie-Pie looked at it hard and careful, but couldn't figure out.

What was that freaky thing? We looked up images on the computer to match the figure but couldn't find a match. We tried searching for ghosts...didn't find a single matching image. We tried scuba gear and still no matching image. Finally, we tried UFOs and aliens. We scrolled down and here was a black and white picture of a little girl in a white dress. There was that figure again. It was an extraterrestrial being. We looked at the details of when the picture was taken. It appeared to be president John F. Kennedy's daughter and the conspiracy which he was involved with. It was a little spooky but interesting.

I spent two hours over at Sweetie-Pie's house and when I got home, it was already 4 in the evening. I had a seat on the couch. Natalie was watching a TV show that interested her more than aquariums. She told me a lot about it while she was looking for something to watch on NETFLIX. She was hooked to this show on the History Channel called "Ancient Aliens" I suddenly began to get hooked too after a few short glances. It took me by surprise on how much there was. Like my grandfather used to say: "If you sink your teeth into a subject sandwich, you find some things will enlighten you"

The show explained what history books never tell like President Kennedy was part of many alien conspiracies and it talked about "Project Blue Books" that I didn't know before. I've read a lot about Project Blue Book and there was a book that got my attention that I needed to read. "Chariots of the Gods" So I listened to more detail about what the book talked about.

[shakib-posts]

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[lavidademarimar]

A/N: I’ve decided to make a masterlist and I’ll update it for the days I have left.

Summary: Jack dedicates himself to Elena’s recovery, with a plan in motion for the future.

Word count: 5834 (whew, a handful, but bear with me)

Warnings: post-panic attack triggers, hopefully nothing too bad.

Day Twelve - “I don’t expect you to understand, but please don’t treat me like I’m made of glass”

As predicted, Elena woke up at 5 am with a throbbing headache that made it difficult for her to see. Her body felt heavy. She took deep breaths for a while, trying to find the strength to sit up. Her stomach rumbled. She hadn’t eaten anything in over 20 hours and threw up half the Atlantic Ocean. Her throat ached. She felt like a really bad nightmare. She saw Jack sleeping on the floor next to her bed.

‘Oh my god,’ she said. She got off the bed slowly and knelt next to him. She shook him a bit to wake him. ‘Hey, hey, birdie, wake up. Come to bed.’

He groaned and when he saw it was Elena, he stood up quickly to face her. He hugged her for what felt an eternity.

‘Jack… you’re hurting me a little bit,’ she said, breathing erratically.

‘Sorry, sorry, sorry,’ he let her go and stared at her. She had big bags under her eyes and looked a bit gaunt. She was frail and he just wanted to hold her until she felt better.

‘Do I look that bad?’ she asked, embarrassed.

‘What the hell are you talking about?’ he tucked her hair behind her ear and kissed her cheek.

She smiled weakly. Everything was hard. ‘I’m really hungry right now. I’m going to see what leftovers are there to eat.’

‘No. Ye will stay in bed. Ye need to rest. I will get ye some food, understood?’ he stood up quickly.

She sat back on the bed and agreed. She didn’t have the strength to fight. He kissed her cheek again and left.

Jack opened the fridge, took out the plate they’d saved for Elena, and heated the meat quickly in the microwave.

‘Mate? Why are you awake? It’s like half five,’ said Tom, who got woken up by the clinkering sounds coming from the open kitchen.

‘She’s awake and she’s hungry. I am only a humble servant,’ he said smiling as he grabbed everything and went back to Elena’s room.

‘Bloody tosser,’ said Tom as he fell asleep again.

‘We saved ye some food,’ he said, giving Elena the plate.

‘That’s so thoughtful. Thanks,’ she cut the meat and ate slowly. She closed her eyes and smiled. ‘This meat is so good.’

Jack stared at her eat. ‘I was so scared today,’ he said, putting his hand on her leg.

She looked at him and tears formed in her eyes. ‘I didn’t want you to know that side of me.’

‘I want to know every side there is to ye. What do I have to do to make ye believe me?’ he asked.

‘Let me come to that at my own time,’ she sighed. ‘I’m sorry you had to see that today.’

‘Olivia and Lucia didn’t let me do anything,’ he said, frustrated and angry.

‘I know. It’s what they have been instructed to do. Most people don’t know how to act around my panic attacks, so it’s best to cut them off to avoid me plunging deeper into wherever it is I go,’ she said calmly.

‘I want to know how to help ye,’ he said.

‘I’m not going to have another panic attack during this trip,’ she said.

‘I’m not talking about this trip, Elena,’ he said.

‘Please, let’s not talk about this now. I know we’re going to and I want to, but not now,’ she said, taking another bite.

He laid down on the bed and caressed her leg while she ate. When she was done, he grabbed the plate and put it on the floor. She stood up to go to the bathroom and brush her teeth, and came back to cuddle with him. They fell asleep shortly after.

Olivia knocked on the door before opening it just in case. It was approximately 11 am. She saw Jack wide awake sitting on the bed and Elena still asleep. He was playing with her hair.

‘How is she?’ Olivia asked.

‘Ate everything we left for her at about half five. She’s been asleep on and off since then. She’s still knackered,’ he said.

‘It’s good she ate. We’re going to go to Frente Azul for a bit and then walk around the town, okay? I think she’ll sleep for most of the day today, so if you want to come with us, you’re invited,’ said Olivia.

‘Thanks, Oli, but I’ll stay here with her. I’m not going to be good company if I don’t know she’s okay with my own eyes.’ Jack didn’t take his eyes off Elena.

Olivia smiled. ‘I figured. Well, call us if she needs anything. I don’t think we’ll be gone the whole day. We’re all a bit tired.’

Jack nodded. ‘No problem. I’ll take care of her, Oli. Don’t worry.’

Olivia grabbed the plate that was on the floor and left the room.

‘How is she?’ asked Lucia.

‘Still asleep. He’s awake, though,’ said Olivia.

Hearing that, Tom walked over to Elena’s room and opened the door. He found Jack going through his stuff, looking for a book, while Elena still slept on the bed.

‘Hey, mate. Everything all right here?’ Tom asked.

‘Yeah, mate. Seems like it. She’s bloody knackered,’ said Jack.

‘Do you want some breakfast? You don’t know when she’s going to wake up,’ said Tom.

‘Aye, yer right. I should eat something,’ he said, putting the book on the bed.

‘Olivia said you’re staying here for the day?’ asked Tom.

‘I’m not going anywhere without her,’ said Jack.

Tom laughed. ‘You know, I wish we could show this Jack to your 2013 version of yourself to see what he’d say.’

Jack punched him softly in the arm. ‘Arsehole.’

‘Jack?’ Elena mumbled from the bed, not moving much.

He fell to his knees to look at her properly. ‘Hi, birdie. I’m here. Do ye need anything?’

She barely shook her head. ‘What time is it?’

‘It’s 10:45,’ said Jack.

‘Why are you still here? Where is everyone?’ she asked.

‘We haven’t left, love. We’re starting late today,’ said Tom.

She tried to lift her head to face Tom but was unsuccessful.

Jack tucked her hair behind her ear. ‘Don’t force yerself to do anything today.’

She nodded. ‘I’m going to go back to sleep. You can go with the others if you want. I’m not going to be much company today.’

‘Don’t worry about me, Elena. Just go back to sleep.’ He gave her a kiss on the cheek and stood up to follow Tom for breakfast. Jack left the door open in case Elena beckoned.

‘Are you sure you don’t want to come with us, mate? She told you she’s going to sleep for the day, basically,’ said Harry.

Jack shook his head. ‘I’m staying with the bird and will watch her sleep for the entire day if I have to. I don’t mind.’

The boys all shared a look amongst themselves. ‘All right, mate. See you later,’ said Harry, still laughing at Jack.

‘Yer bloody wanks ye lot!’ Jack told them.

‘You’re Prince bloody Charming now. I can’t believe it,’ said Tom.

Fionn shook his head as he passed by Jack, confused by how his friend was acting. ‘Can someone explain to me where is Jack and who is this person?’ Fionn asked.

They all laughed as they got in the car. ‘I’ve no idea, mate. It’s obvious he likes the bird, and Elena’s great, but what the fuck,’ said Harry.

‘I’m baffled,’ said Tom, smiling. ‘I think it’s great, though. It was time a bird tied his balls around her neck.’

None of them understood exactly what was going on, but the minute Jack saw Elena coming out the water on a surfboard without breathing, something inside him snapped. He felt something he couldn’t explain. He couldn’t do anything yesterday and he understood why Olivia and Lucia had pushed all of them away and he respected it, but now he wanted to prove himself worthy of taking care of her. He came back into the room, she opened her eyes and moved to face him.

‘I’m sorry, Birdie. Did I wake you?’ he asked sitting on the bed.

‘No, prince bloody charming,’ she giggled. ‘I’ve been awake for a bit, but I’ll fall asleep soon to regain my strength. Would you like to join me?’ she said, scooting to make room for him. It really was a small bed for the two of them.

He smiled, lied down next to her and wrapped her in his arms. She closed her eyes and breathed into his chest. He stayed very still to not disturb her. He was treating her like a porcelain doll.

‘It feels so weird to sleep with you with our clothes on,’ she said.

He laughed loudly. There she was. She was coming back to herself. He kissed her forehead. ‘It is strange, isn’t it?’ he asked.

‘Yeah but I can do this today. I don’t want you naked around me because I don’t have the strength to blow you right now,’ she said.

‘I wouldn’t take my clothes off now even if ye begged me for it. Ye need to rest,’ he said.

‘I could beg and I would win, just so you know,’ she said smiling.

‘Ye, probably. Sleep,’ he closed his eyes and hoped she’d do the same. After moving a little trying to find a good spot, he felt her relax.

Jack woke up a couple of hours later and went to watch TV. He appreciated being by himself. He had so much to think about. He couldn’t get away. He was so in the moment, wrapped up in her and everything she had to offer, good and bad, that he didn’t care about anything else. He had never felt this way, and every time he was with her, he understood why there had never been anyone else like her in his life. He was concentrated staring out to the garden that he didn’t see Elena leave her room and snuggle up to him. She nibbled his ear to get his attention. He jumped.

‘Birdie! What are ye doing?’ he grabbed her and sat her on his lap.

‘I was a bit cold and I saw you weren’t there,’ she said. Her eyes were still droopy and she looked broken, but she smiled at him.

‘I’m sorry. I didn’t want to wake ye,’ he was being very careful around her. He was scared he’d break her.

‘Don’t apologise, birdie, I don’t expect you to be a walking corpse like I am today,’ she was being self-deprecating.

‘Please, don’t say yer a corpse. Ye didn’t see yerself getting dragged out of the ocean,’ he squeezed her a little and nuzzled his face on her neck.

She straddled him, grabbed his face and pulled him close. She wanted to feel Jack against her, her new normal. He closed his eyes and moved her next to him. He didn’t go for it.

‘I can’t do that right now. Yer…’ he couldn’t even finish the sentence. What the hell was going on?

‘Jack, I’m not broken. This is just a part of who I am. I don’t expect you to understand, but please don’t treat me like I’m made of glass because it is really unnecessary and it just makes me more self-conscious,’ she sat up and spoke firmly.

Jack scratched his beard and grabbed his head, frustrated and confused. ‘I’m sorry. I don’t know what to do. I just want ye to be better.’

‘Well, you can fucking kiss me for starters and then you can go buy me Cool Ranch Doritos,’ she smiled.

It was true that they had only known each other for almost two weeks, but he could already see right through her. Her mouth said something but her eyes betrayed her. She was exhausted. She was putting on a show for him because she felt guilty he stayed behind for her. He smiled back and pulled her to him. The kiss started slowly but feeling her close again made Jack hungry for more. There was need and confusion. He wanted to find where he stood in her. She was the one that pushed him away.

‘I can’t breathe,’ she said. ‘You see what happens when you stop doing that for two days? You try to suck out my lungs.’

He laughed. ‘I’ll never stop doing that if ye don’t want me to,’ and he shrugged. ‘Cool Ranch Doritos then? I’ll go buy some more beer and crisps for tonight. Anything else?’

‘No, just that, I think,’ she said absentmindedly as she slid the door open to the garden. She walked over to the border of the pool and lied down there. She’d been acting like everything was fine for a bit too long and she needed to be alone again. He stared at her for a bit then stood up and left.

Elena dipped her hand in the pool and closed her eyes. She was so tired. It was difficult for her to think, let alone act and do things. Right now, her brain was fighting the exhaustion she had after every panic attack and the need it had to be near Jack all the time. She loved how he felt when he wrapped himself around her, his beard on her neck and her chest when he used her as a pillow. He made her feel beautiful and desirable, which were two things she hadn’t completely felt in a while. It was true she’d improved with therapy and she didn’t second-guess herself anymore, but this holiday with Jack she’d seen how things could be when she was with someone who appreciated her at her best and encouraged it. Not only that, but he found it arousing. Now, he faced the other side of the coin, the one she didn’t feel like showing in a holiday, but there it was. And there it had her, lying on the floor with her hand in the pool. She thought of going into the pool but she was too tired to prove anything to herself today.

Jack came back from the grocery store with some stuff he wanted and found Elena exactly like he left her. He slid the door open and stared at her without saying anything. She’d tried all day to not be a corpse recovering her strength after the hideous day she’d had just because he was around, and he’d realised that, which is why he told her he’d be going to buy some beer and crisps to give her space.

‘Ellie?’ he’d never called her that but it’s what came out of his mouth in that moment.

Her hand stopped moving in the water. She took a deep breath and pulled herself upwards and stood up slowly. She still wasn’t herself. He felt bad for disturbing her but he was met with a genuine smile on her part.

‘Why did you call me Ellie?’ she asked.

‘I’ve no idea. It’s what came out. I guess because everyone calls ye that,’ he said.

‘But I like Birdie. I think it’s cute,’ she walked closer to him and tiptoed herself to reach his mouth for a kiss. He leaned into her and smiled.

‘I found yer Doritos, by the way,’ he said triumphantly.

She clapped. ‘Yay! Thanks. You’re the best,’ she hugged him.

‘Listen, we don’t have to right now because yer recovering, but when ye feel better, I have a lot of questions about yesterday,’ he said.

Elena nodded. ‘I wouldn’t expect anything less. I will answer them as I can.’

‘It doesn’t have to be now. Do ye want to watch a film?’

‘Do you want to walk around for a bit? I think fresh air will be nice,’ she made her way inside.

‘Sure. Now?’ he asked.

‘Yeah, let me put a dress on and we can go,’ she went in her room.

The others came back from the beach and were surprised to find an empty house but with new crisps and loads of beer.

‘Where do you think they are?’ Tom asked.

‘They’re probably just walking around,’ said Fionn.

‘Oooh Doritos,’ said Harry, grabbing the bag.

‘No!’ screamed Olivia. Harry dropped the bag in surprise. ‘Grab the other bags. Cool Ranch is Elena’s favourite. He probably bought them for her and she’s going to eat them later, and if you eat them she’s going to be the one that punches you this time.’

‘Duly noted, m’lady,’ Harry grabbed the other bag of crisps and sat on the sofa.

They had walked for a couple of blocks in silence but holding hands. She knew what he was thinking and she felt this need to make him realise he didn’t need to worry about her. She also enjoyed the fact that the silence between them stopped being awkward on their second day together, but today it was deafening.

‘What do you want to know?’ asked Elena.

‘I don’t want to pressure ye right now into this,’ said Jack.

She shook her head. ‘I feel better, I promise. The cool breeze does me well.’

‘How long have ye been dealing with anxiety and panic attacks?’ he asked.

‘Seven years with panic attacks. Anxiety since I can remember, but I hadn’t put a name on it until I started therapy… Could we sit over there on that pier?’ she pointed to it.

‘Of course. Are ye sure ye want to be so close to the ocean? Doesn’t that… trigger things?’ he asked.

‘Did you read the NHS page on anxiety?’ she laughed.

He was embarrassed. ‘I did.’

‘The ocean isn’t triggering for me. I’m never more at peace than when I’m at the beach. I’m just scared of drowning. Obviously, I still am,’ she kept laughing. She was nervous. She knew these questions would lead to her confiding things in him that she wasn’t sure she was ready to share. He wasn’t pressuring her but he was so genuinely concerned that she felt safe. If that makes sense.

‘Why do ye have anxiety? Do ye know?’ he asked.

She shrugged. ‘I don’t know why. I’ve been through a lot that I try to downplay and reduce its importance, but I’ve learned to avoid that. Family issues, body image issues, depression… I’ve had all of them.’

He sighed. ‘I’m sorry if this is insensitive, but ye just don’t seem like that person.’

‘I’ve been told worse. People think that because I’m outgoing and extroverted that everything is fine, but those are people that don’t pay attention. Everyone has problems. It’s complicated,’ she said, shaking her head.

‘Of course. Yer right. Has therapy been helpful for ye?’ he asked.

‘Very helpful. I had to face a lot of demons and come to terms with things that I didn’t want to, but I’m glad I did. I’m a much more complete person because of it,’ she said, looking to the ocean.

‘I want ye to be able to count on me when ye need help with this. How can I help ye?’ he asked, holding her hand.

She smiled. ‘Again, I hope I don’t have another panic attack around you.’

‘But what if it happens?’ he asked.

‘I told you I didn’t want to talk about this while I’m still like this. I know where this is headed,’ she said defensively.

He was defeated. ‘I’m sorry. I just feel all these things and I want to organise them, and I’m being selfish because yer clearly not okay, but we’re never alone and when we are we’re naked and it’s distracting…’

Elena hugged him and kissed his cheek. ‘I’m sorry. I promise we’ll talk about all these things because I feel them too, but I can’t mentally right now.’

He put his arm around her. ‘Yer so strong. I don’t know if ye fully know it.’

‘I am going to record you,’ she laughed.

‘Yer not getting rid of me anytime soon. I’ll say those things in person,’ he kissed her neck repeatedly and she giggled.

She sighed. ‘There’s no escaping this conversation, is it? I mean, whatever we say it’s going to swerve back to what we want to do after the holiday is over.’

He shrugged his shoulders. ‘Seems like it.’

She sighed again, staring at the ocean crashing into the rocks. ‘Well, you can go first.’

Jack talked quickly, thinking she’d stop him and refuse to discuss it, so he wanted to get the words out while he could. ‘I think we should consider the possibility of dating after we go back to our lives. I know ye have yer doubts, and I understand, but I also know that I’m not going to meet another woman like ye anywhere. Yer smart, beautiful and kind, and I know ye’ll be it. The Eurostar has a London – Brussels line and plane tickets can be cheap. We can go back and forth to see how that works and then see where that takes us…’ he stopped speaking to see how she was reacting. She had turned around completely to face him and had tears in her eyes. He wiped the tears off her face and kissed her temple.

‘We’ve been amazing. I’m terrified we’ll ruin it,’ she grabbed his arm and didn’t let go. She was almost in foetal position.

‘We have been amazing, Elena. I know all my wanker friends have told ye already, but this is very new to me and I like it and I don’t want it to stop. If ye don’t want to stop either, why should we? Ye know?’ he grabbed her hand again.

She laughed. ‘All my wanker friends…’ she said in his accent. ‘You’re right.’

‘I bloody know! Fucking traitors!’ Jack smiled and his dimples looked particularly adorable beneath his -now fuller- beard.

‘What if it’s not what we imagined? I mean, it’s pretty different to be in a holiday in a sunny place, the beach, we have sex whenever we want, we drink wine…’ her voice trailed off, ‘...than to be in our own lives in two cities while still having to cater to a mobile and a person on the other side of it,’ her voice broke a little. She was still weak.

‘Then I’m going to convince ye to move to London,’ he said, not looking at her.

‘Excuse me?’ she snapped her head to him.

He laughed. ‘Then it didn’t work, but we tried anyway. I know ye want to say yes but I don’t know why ye have a fucking voice that tells ye otherwise! I think that’s the wanker that made ye kick me out on our first day here.’

She shrieked, laughed and snuggled into him. ‘Do you still hate me for that?’

He seemed surprised for that question. ‘I was frustrated, Birdie, but I’ve never hated ye. I want to date ye and be with ye for as long as ye’ll put up with me.’

‘What if you get sick of me first?’ she asked honestly. She was being so consumed by doubt at this point that she was surprised she could continue thinking.

He laughed and put his arm around her and kissed her temple. ‘The only thing I’m going to get sick of is ye doubting yerself all the bloody time. Ye know what ye want. Tell that voice to fuck off and annoy someone else!’

She grabbed him by the shirt and kissed him deeply. Elena always believed in signs, and she desperately needed one right now. But what more of a sign than this entire holiday? They’d met on the first day and clicked immediately. They have amazing sex. He has great friends who got along with her great friends. They can talk for hours and he doesn’t seem to be scared by her or her otherworldly thoughts. They can sit in silence and it’s more intimate than the sex.

She sighed. ‘Okay, Sam Heughan. Let’s see how we do. Let’s… give it a try. You are so annoying,’ she said, not letting go of his shirt.

‘And ye are so unbelievably special. We’re only getting started, Birdie. Wait until ye see how annoying I can actually be,’ he said triumphantly, hugging her.

‘Let’s give each other a month of settling back into our lives and then we can plan to go back and forth. I don’t want to extend this holiday. I want to start this by being the smartest we can be about it,’ she said. She wasn’t in her 100% and she was already planning and making mental notes and adding colours to her planner.

‘Sounds reasonable. We can plan when we can actually spend weekends out of our cities.’ Jack had his own agenda. She’d said yes, which is what he wanted, but he was going to go to Brussels as soon as he could.

‘Are you going along to what I’m saying to not pressure me into doing things I don’t want to do?’ she was suspicious. He was absolutely transparent when he was with her.

‘Ye already said yes to dating me, Birdie. I don’t have an agenda,’ he was trying to mask his feelings. ‘Should we go back? Ye should rest.’

She nodded. ‘Great idea. I am still a bit knackered.’

They walked holding hands all the way back. They were mostly quiet. Jack wanted to tell her everything he was feeling, but he understood that she still wasn’t herself and that she needed to digest everything that had been said between them. They would give it a shot. She was terrified.

Elena opened the door to the house and they were all outside in the pool. She put her set of keys in the bowl, grabbed the bag of Doritos and made her way out.

‘Lovers! Where have you been?’ asked Harry. He was drunk again. He’d lost count on how many sangrias he’d had.

‘We went walking around so I could get some fresh air,’ said Elena as she sat down on the edge of the pool.

‘How are you feeling?’ asked Olivia.

‘I’m still tired but I’m better. Jack has been exceedingly attentive today, he’s taken good care of me,’ said Elena.

On cue, Jack popped out of the sliding door.

‘Sangria, Birdie?’ he asked.

‘Water, please,’ she turned to him and smiled. She melted him.

Tom got out of the pool and sat next to Elena. ‘Good to see that you’re better. You gave us all a fright yesterday.’

She grabbed his arm and gave him a kiss on his shoulder just as Jack was coming out with his sangria and her water. ‘If it makes you feel better, I was pretty scared myself.’

Jack sat next to Elena and gave her the water. He was absolutely unfazed by the cute gesture she did to Tom. She’d said they’d try dating. He’d won all the races and climbed all the mountains. She let Tom go and drank it slowly. Her throat still ached.

‘Why don’t you sleep early today? You still need to rest,’ said Lucia.

‘Yeah, that’s the plan. I’ll take a shower after we eat and then bed. Hey, why don’t we watch a film like you suggested before we left? I’m in the mood,’ said Elena, putting her hand on Jack’s leg.

‘Aye, I’ll set up the whole thing. Wait here,’ he said standing up and going inside.

‘Did something happen between you two?’ asked Tom, eyeing her suspiciously.  

‘No, why?’ Elena didn’t feel good, but she knew when someone was fishing out information.

‘You seem… I don’t know, I can’t explain it. Something happened. I know my boy,’ said Tom.

Her stomach played a prank on her and she stood up quickly without saying anything and ran to the bathroom. Jack followed her and heard her vomiting.

‘Elena, are ye all right?’ he asked, knowing what she’d answer.

‘Yes, I’m fine,’ she was turning out to be predictable.

‘Can I come in?’ he asked.

‘Mate, you don’t have to fucking follow her to the loo. Let her have some privacy,’ said Fionn, laughing, as he grabbed a beer and went outside again.

‘She’s bloody vomiting!’ he snapped. He opened the door slowly and saw her vomit again.

She stopped, sighed, and flushed. She grabbed the toilet to stand up and he grabbed her waist to support her. She opened the sink and splashed water on her face. She made gargles with water and then brushed her teeth.

‘I’m going to lie down. Sorry about the film,’ she said.

He smiled. ‘Don’t worry, birdie. Do ye want me to come with ye?’

She grabbed his face. ‘You’ve been amazing today. Go be with your friends. I’m going to be okay.’

He kissed her cheek. ‘I’ll come in a bit to check up on ye.’

She went into her room and he went outside.

‘Is she all right?’ asked Olivia.

‘She vomited. Does that happen usually?’ asked Jack.

‘I don’t really remember,’ said Olivia getting out of the pool. Lucia followed suit. They grabbed towels to dry off.

‘She said she’s going to sleep,’ said Jack.

‘Listen, Prince Charming. You’ve been good but she’s ours, okay?’ said Olivia as she slid into the house.

He lifted his hands in defeat. At this point, he knew better than to pick a fight with Olivia and Lucia, who would surely beat him.

Lucia opened the door and Elena was lying down taking deep breaths.

‘Hey, we heard you threw up. Are you okay?’ asked Lucia.

Elena sighed. ‘Yeah, I think eating the Doritos was a bad idea when I hadn’t eaten anything all day.’

The girls made their way into the bed and the three of them were wrapped in each other.

‘How the fuck has he fit in this bed for two weeks?’ asked Lucia, moving uncomfortably.

Elena laughed out loud. ‘You can ask him later.’

‘Okay, I’m sorry I’m bringing this up but why did you say the Jack thing when we were bringing Elena home?’ Olivia asked.

Lucia rolled her eyes. ‘Seriously, Oli?’

‘What Jack thing?’ asked Elena.

Olivia shrugged her shoulders. ‘I’m curious.’

‘I told you on the first day this shouldn’t be a situation where you two crazy bitches start planning the wedding, and I firmly maintain that statement…’ Lucia started talking but Olivia interrupted.

‘But? There has to be a but!’ Olivia was very excited.

Lucia sighed exasperated. ‘I’m not saying you two are in love and you should be serious or whatever. But… this trip has proved to be more intense than all of us anticipated, and Jack is a cool guy – with some things that need to be looked at carefully – and he is… I don’t even know how to say it. He just really fucking likes you, and I don’t think you guys should waste this opportunity if both of you want to continue whatever happened here.’

Elena hadn’t told Olivia and Lucia what she and Jack had talked about, as they had agreed to keep it between them. After living in the eye of the hurricane for the whole holiday, it was time to make their ‘whatever this is’ about the two of them. She stayed quiet staring at Lucia, then at the floor, then at Olivia’s unbearable smile, then at the window. She shrugged. The voice never stopped talking. Not caring for two weeks had proven easy, but continuing this whole thing? Them living in two different cities, organising weekend trips, adjusting each other into their established lives. 

What if the magic got lost in the way? 

Lucia had a point when she said this shouldn’t go past the holiday, but she was also right that Elena and Jack had amazing potential. She felt surprisingly at ease with him now, and the boys had said so many times that Jack had never acted like how he was being with her that she started believing them a little; not mentioning all the times Jack and her had those little private conversations that they hadn’t shared with their friends, those little moments that belonged to them in which Jack confessed to her that she was the most special woman he’d ever met, and that he was determined to continue seeing her to see how they could fit their lives around this. They weren’t in love with each other – not yet at least, but they were both mature enough and idealistic enough to know that what had happened in the past twelve days in Portugal was pretty fucking special.

‘I’m thinking about it,’ said Elena, revealing little else.

‘I think it would be a fantastic idea,’ said Olivia.

‘Of course you do,’ said Elena and Lucia at the same time.

‘You probably have a Pinterest board already that’s called Scottish wedding,’ said Elena.

‘I won’t confirm nor deny this,’ said Olivia, hugging her.

‘You’re suffocating me!’ said Elena, laughing.

Adam, Luis and Jack were outside the room and heard the laughter. Tom took his mobile out, took a picture of the three of them and sent it to Elena.

‘This has been a really intense trip, hasn’t it?’ asked Elena.

‘A bit too much, if you ask me,’ said Lucia.

‘I’m so happy we’re finally together,’ said Olivia.

‘Me too. I also like our new friends,’ said Elena.

‘It’s absurd how we go to a small town and you manage to find a boyfriend and a group of boys that absolutely worship you. You’d make friends with the sand if it talked back,’ said Olivia.

They laughed. A knock on the door.

‘Come in!’ the three of them said as Adam, Luis and Jack stared at them.

‘Dinner’s ready!’ said Adam.

‘Are ye feeling better?’ asked Jack.

‘I am feeling better,’ said Elena sitting up.

Olivia didn’t want to let go of them. ‘Nooooo, let’s stay like this a while longer!’

Lucia and Elena laughed. ‘It’s food. Let’s go!’ said Lucia.

Elena left the room first with Jack, whose face lit up when he saw she was actually telling the truth and looked better.

Olivia and Lucia saw the whole thing and turned to each other.

They laughed. ‘What do you think she’ll do?’ asked Olivia.

‘Honestly? Right now, off the top of my head, I think they will continue it. She’ll be sceptical at first, then it will work, then she will finally allow herself to feel happiness, and she’ll end up moving to London before the end of the year. They’ll live together, he’ll propose in Scotland and they’ll end up living there with a couple of kids that are allergic to the sun,’ she stood up and went outside with Luis, who laughed at her theory. He knew she was right.

Olivia looked at what was happening outside, like a movie she was filming. She had hoped for so long that things would feel in place for all of them and in twelve days she’d had more than she’d bargained for: she was with her two best friends again, and she was finally able to see Elena enjoy herself with a guy that wasn’t an asshole and who seemed very eager to be with her. She came back to herself and saw Jack put his head on Elena’s shoulder and her play with his beard while she continued talking to Harry. Oli laughed while she felt an arm grab her by the waist and pull her inside.

‘Let’s play around while they’re all outside,’ Adam said to her ear.

She laughed. ‘Let’s.’

NEXT: Part Eight

[deathbyignis]

Drautos x Reader pt 3

You awaken to the sound of the alarm system to your home arming, the secondary panel being next to your bedroom door. The room is dark, and you can make out the faint street lights invading your bedroom from below. Your mind didn't register at first, but you finally surmised that it was early--very early. You turned to the clock, 3:17 am. You lay there for a moment trying to shake the cobwebs from your brain. Where was he going at this hour, you ask yourself. The Kingsglaive had the day off, save for a dinner event with King Regis tonight. Crownsguard too for that matter, so it isn't like he has a meeting with Cor or Clarus. You finally decide to get up, go pee, then move your tired body downstairs. The kitchen still smells of coffee, the remnants of a microwaveable breakfast sandwich sit on the counter. At your feet is a little dog begging for the crumbs. Your body has been through the ringer these past two days and as you stretch, you felt it screaming for relief. Ungodly amounts of PT, 10 battles vs. your fellow Glaives, and a few rough romps with Titus...you decide to clean up his mess later and head to your couch. You turn the tv on to the local news, as you often did (not like you are planning actually watch anything anyway), and curl up in your favorite fuzzy blanket with Titan snugly tucked underneath and lose consciousness immediately. When you wake again, you assess by the position of the sun coming through your windows that it is around 10am. You feel nauseous, and stay still for several minutes. You can't remember the last time you slept like that and you are grateful for the chance to rest your body. You sit up slowly and Titan runs straight for the door. Poor kid must have been holding it for some while now. "I know, imma gonna get dressed and we'll go ok" you say to him as you dart upstairs to put some clothes on. A simple athleisure outfit will have to do as anything else would be over-doing for this simple task. You grab your phone, a bottle of water and you are out the door. The park is off-limits now, so you take Titan the opposite direction. The first patch of grass you see, he does his business and begins his ritual of sniffing every other dog that has been in the area for the past month. You take the opportunity to check your phone. 23 messages. Someone was on a bender last night, you think. Crowe: What are you wearing to dinner tomorrow? I don't have shit! Can I borrow something? Nyx: Man, you really fucked him up! Nice work glaive! Titus: I'm sorry please come home. Pelna: This overnight guard shift is bullshit! Titus: where did you go? Come home. Crowe: I remember you wearing a really sexy nude colored dress to a ball last year, maybe that? Still have it? Nyx: I think he actually believes you are Yojimbo! 😂 Libertus: (to group) need...whiskey. Crowe: if you don't want to loan me the dress, you can say. Nyx (to group) I got Scotch, but no whiskey. Libertus: (to group) is that what I asked for hero? Pelna: (to group) I don't have either because I'm in hell! Tredd: (to group) I got both but keeping it all for myself. Libertus: (to group) greedy ginger bastard Pelna: (to group) LOL Crowe: (to group) Shut the fuck up! Some of us are trying to sleep! Nyx: (to group) where is y/n Tredd: (to group) silence your phone Libertus: (to group) probably giving the king a bj with her purdy Tenebrae mouth. Crowe: it still vibrates Tredd: you must really love this then Nyx: Ohhhhhh No you didn't Crowe: fuck you Tredd stop or I'll put your balls in a magic vice next training. Titus: didn't want to wake my angel. I love you. You're pissing yourself with laughter at the insanity of your friends, and are irritated at Titus for not telling you where he went or when he would be back. You assess that his text was to sent to curtail your annoyance. You start firing off the texts. To Crowe: of course you can wear it, though the chest area may be a little tight on you! 😘 To Nyx: thanks friend, it always feels good to do good work! To KG group: you guys are nuts! I ❤️u! Except Lib...we'll talk tonight. Titus: where are you baby? Crowe calls immediately and the two of you set up a time to meet at her place so you can get ready together. She initially wants to meet at your place so she can browse your closet for options, but you make a couple of excuses and agree to bring the options to her. You scoop up Titan and head back inside. 10:47 You have just over five hours before meeting Crowe. She lives in the same area of Insomnia as Nyx and Lib, which is close to the Citadel. It will take you 30 minutes to get there, so you have to leave your place in 4 1/2 hours. You decide to hit up your closet, since you haven't even contemplated your evening attire. It was custom for the men to wear their Kingsglaive uniforms to official engagements, but a woman in hers is just ghastly. You had a large selection of gowns and cocktail dresses from your life in Tenebrae, and a few that Titus had bought you. You first pulled the dress that Crowe had specifically requested, then inspected the remaining. You pulled two black dresses that you thought would fit Crowe perfectly and a burnt orange one that you thought she would love. 11:24. You check your phone. No response from Titus. You send him another message: I'm meeting Crowe at her place at 4:00 to get ready. Will you be home by then? You throw your phone on the bed with a sigh, and feel your body temperature rising. You turn back to your closet, and pull out two cocktail dresses. One red, one midnight blue. You decide that six dresses is enough options for two women and zip them up in a garment bag. You proceed to pull the matching shoes and stuff them in a duffle bag with your makeup and assorted nail polishes. 12:37 You send another message: Baby are you ok? I'm starting to worry. Titus ignoring your texts was par for the course when you knew he was at work. He kept his personal phone on silent while inside the Citadel for obvious reasons. He couldn't exactly have his phone chiming if he was in a meeting with Clarus or Cor or holy shit, The King. Today, however, you were 90% sure that he wasn't at the Citadel which was the annoying part. You decide to take a shower and do your hair so you can focus on taming Crowe's thick mop when you got to her place. 1:09 You emerge from the shower and check your phone. Nothing. You contemplated texting his work phone but thought better of it, remembering the argument that ensued last time. 2:22 You finally finish straightening and styling your hair in the most elaborate braided scheme you have ever conjured. The style allows your length to fall beyond your shoulders, while the braids keep it away from your face. It looks damn good and you are pretty damn proud of yourself. Your phone didn't make a sound the entire time you were fighting with your hair. Now you are pissed. You stare at your phone, refusing to pick it up or send another text to Titus. You look around the bedroom and your closet catches your gaze. You don't know where he has been all day, but you are certain he will make it to dinner tonight, and a plan to make him suffer unfolds in your brain. You open the closet door and pull an asymmetrical burgundy-wine colored dress out. You last wore it to the aforementioned graduation party, the night you fucked Gladiolus Amicitia. He didn't know that small detail, but Titus forbade you from wearing it again, as in his words, "every man there got an instant erection" when they saw you that night--including himself. This thing has "sinner" written all over it. Plunging neckline and back, the highest point of the skirt about three inches from your slit. Perfect. You are happy that you had the smarts to hang the matching panties and backless push-up bra with the dress. 2:49 You text Crowe that you are on your way and scoop up the bags and your purse and bolt for the door. You are concerned about him, but seeing as though this is not his first disappearing act, you find yourself leaning more and more towards angry and you don't want to chance meeting him in the garage. 3:22 You arrive at Crowe's and haul everything up three fights of stairs. She must have heard you stomping, because she opens the door just as you put your hand up to knock. You walk into the small apartment, and see Nyx and Lib sitting on the couch in their KG unis, minus their jackets. You drop everything in a pile and launch yourself onto Libertus. "My Tenebrae mouth"? you yell as you punch him in the shoulder with everything you have. Maneuvering yourself to suffocate him into the couch cushions, you take position on top of him and growl "My Tenebrae mouth"? "What does that even mean Libertus"? "Sorry, I'm so sorry" Libertus begs for you to release him. To Nyx's delight you punch him in the same spot again, praying to The Six that he has a horrific bruise by dinner time. "Enough, children" comes Crowe's annoyed voice. You slap Libertus lightly on his cheek as you jump off of him, eliciting a giggle from his BFF. Crowe helps you pick everything up and the two of you disappear into her bedroom. When you both emerge, Libertus and Nyx look stunned. The times they get to see you like this are few and far between. Jaws dropping, eyes popping, you are confident that your choices of the burgundy and burnt orange dresses were on point. The boys are speechless. Crowe breaks the silence "Alright enough gawking, lets go get this over with" she says with pure disdain. She is a stunning beauty, but never appreciates people pointing it out. You take one last look at your phone and throw it onto Crowe's couch upon exit. 6:54 Your crew arrives at the Citadel 30 minutes early. You are led to the Royal Banquet Room and it is already 70% full. You scan the room like a sniper looking for your target. No Titus. No Cor. "Hey guys, can I take your picture" a sweet kid asks, startling you. "Sure" Nyx replies as the four of you get close. ::flash:: "Thanks, love the lighting in here"! "You guys Glaives"? He asks darting his eyes between Lib and Nyx. "Yes, all four of us" you retort with clear annoyance causing the kid to blush. "Right, sorry, of course" he replies shyly. "What's your name", Crowe asks the kid. "Oh, uh sorry, yeah, um, I'm Prompto". "Nice to meet you Prompto, so where's the bar"? He points in the general direction of the bar, mesmerized by Crowe's tits squished in a dress made for your much less ample frame. You chuckle at his awkwardness and walk away with your friends. On your way to get your liquid courage to face Cor, you exchange pleasantries with various dignitaries, Crownsguard members, and Glaives. Every one of them, except the few women, would fail the eye color test if challenged. The four of you each covertly take a shot, order your drink of choice, bring them to the massive marble table in the center of the room, and take your seats. You sit in the middle of the table, boys on one side, girls on the other, directly facing each other. Crowe on your left, Nyx directly across from you. You know from experience this is the best strategy to avoid awkward conversations with the King or Clarus, or being the one to have to wake the prince. A small delicate bell rings and the crowd converges upon the table. Everyone takes a seat and you wink at Nyx for being the genius of your seating arrangement. It is 7:28 and the King is about to enter, but still no sign of Titus or Cor. The table is abuzz with various chatter when a bellowing voice announces his Majesty's entrance. In unison, 70 people push their chairs back and stand in deafening silence. Titus and Cor enter first, followed by the King. You feel like an idiot for not even contemplating that they would enter with King Regis, since this dinner is in the honor of the Crownsguard and Kingsglaive. You can't take your eyes off him. He is dressed in his all-black uniform with silver accents, the one you immediately want to peel off of him every time you see it. Touché, darling, touché. You decide the best strategy for tonight is to shoot him darts as an unmistakable silent communication that you are not happy with him. Cor is the yin to Titus' yang. He is in his simple Crownsguard fatigues and you feel tears begin to form when he scans the table and locks eyes on you. There is no smile from him, no encouragement, just a deadpan stare into your soul. Your head immediately drops. The King takes his place at the head of the table and gives a short speech about Titus, Cor, and their respective corps. He touts them as great leaders and heaps praise upon each of them. He speaks of an undisputed truth among the Kingsglaive and Crownsguard alike; each soldier in each division would happily give their life for either of these men, because the soldiers know that Titus and Cor would do the same for any of them. You feel proud to be able to say he is your love, if only to yourself. You shed more than few tears, and are grateful that you aren't the only one to do so. The King finishes and room erupts in applause. Titus and Cor, both equally uncomfortable with public praise, tell everyone to sit. The table continues to stand and applaud, as the King does. After several moments, Clarus places his hand on the King's shoulder and tells him to sit, garnering laughter and another round of applause for Clarus. As you prepare to take your seat, you make eye contact with Titus, but he quickly looks away. The meal is seven courses and by the fourth course, people are getting antsy. You don't sit for this long unless you are in a transport being toted to this battle or back to the Citadel following one. At least in the transports you can stand and stretch. "My ass is starting to hurt" Crowe whispers into your ear. You turn her direction, give her a grin and a knowing nod. You glance past her to see the people at the other end of the table, and see Gladiolus staring at you grinning from ear to ear. You ignore him and quickly turn around again to the King's side of the table. You immediately regret your choice of attire. You continue to make small talk between courses with your neighbors, while stealing glances every now and again at Titus and Cor but your eyes never connect. The final course arrives and everyone huffs the fancy sorbet down in an attempt to get out of there faster. Finally the King stands, wishes everyone well, and informs everyone that he is "too old to keep up with you kids, so I will leave them to you", grinning at Titus and Cor. The two leaders look at each other in feigned horror eliciting a soft chuckle from their audience. The entire table stands once again, and The King makes his exit. Cor announces that since everyone has tomorrow off, Titus and himself have arranged for an after party on the Citadel rooftop veranda. The room erupts in cheers once more, and the group begins to file out of the room with many filing up a massive fight of stairs. Along the way, you try to make amends with Luche and ask how he is. "Fine, good, yeah" he responds, clearly embarrassed by your question. The crowd stops, waiting for the door to be opened. You look around you and see the Prince directly behind you, his face nearly in your ass. The photographer kid is next to him, and that bastard Gladio directly behind him. There is a fourth guy in their group, a tall blonde who seems to be the one keeping all of them in line. You can hear him whispering to Prince Noctis, telling him to back off your ass. You are grateful. You wonder to yourself if this is the group you would be placed with if you do indeed move to the Crownsguard. Your entire body shakes at the thought, and you feel queasy. You quickly turn back and see Nyx and Lib shooting darts at Gladio. You love how protective these guys are of yourself and Crowe, and you give them an appreciative grin. The staircase is slowly becoming a sweltering sauna when finally the door opens. 40, maybe 50 dinner guests converge onto the rooftop seeking cool air. You see no sign of the two men you wish most to avoid, so you take in the scenery. The rooftop is lit up tonight. The massive fish tank with Leviathan's mini-me glows brightly alongside various orbs, cascading water lamps, and the glow of The Crystal. You surmise that there are about 15 tables throughout the veranda and the four of you choose one in what you hope will be a quiet corner. Nyx volunteers to fetch the group's drinks and races off. Lib announces that he has to "take a leak" and disappears somewhere on the other side of the rooftop, leaving you and Crowe alone. "You ok girl", she asks "you've been uncharacteristically tight-lipped tonight". Apparently you weren't doing as good of a job hiding your angst as you thought. "Fine, yeah" you respond staring at the silk tablecloth. "Your lying" she retorts, lifting your chin, forcing you to look at her. "What's going on with you"? "Nothing, really, I am fine" you state with a false smile. She's stares deep into your soul for several moments and the tears begin to well up in your eyes. Crowe grabs you by the hand and leads you towards the rooftop railing for privacy. "Talk to me" she pleads. "I can't Crowe, please stop asking" your gaze is at your feet, and you almost wish this floor had rocks. "Is it a guy, it's always a fucking guy" she states in a disdainful tone. You remain silent as she stares you up and down. "It is" she sighs. "Why didn't you tell me you were fucking someone"? "It's moved way past the fucking stage Crowe". The tears begin to flow and you turn your gaze to the city lights of Insomnia. "I love him". Right on cue, his presence is announced. The soldiers he commands greet him with whistles and hollers but you don't turn around. Crowe announces that she'll be right back and returns moments later with your drinks and some napkins. You chug your gin fizz in one go and a wide-eyed Crowe hands you hers. You pause the debauchery long enough to dry your face. You chance a glance in his direction and he is seated at a table with Tredd, Luche, and Axis, just staring at you. You think he believes that you may be spilling your guts to Crowe now. You quickly turn your back to him and chug Crowe's drink. "Altius, may I have a word with y/n". You freeze. Your stomach sinks and your heart begins to race as if it is trying to push its way out of your chest and make a run for it. The moment you have been dreading all night is here. Cor. "Of course" Crowe stutters. You can hear the click of her shoes as she walks away. Cor stands close to you, but turned the opposite direction, possibly looking at Titus. "This isn't the time or place for a heart to heart, so I'm going to keep this short and simple" he says in a steady tone. Turning his gaze in an attempt to make eye contact with you, "There will always be a place for you in the Crownsguard, should you wish it". There is a long pause. "Thank you" you respond, your voice cracking. "Will you be at your session tomorrow"? You turn to face him, "of course". "Good, we can talk more then" he says turning to walk towards the Crownsguard group. After several minutes you go to your table and let them know you are heading to the ladies room. Crowe follows. You can feel multiple sets of eyes watching you--including Titus--when really what you desire most is to disappear into the landscape. You reach the restroom, lock yourself in a stall, and do your business. When you come out to wash your hands, you look into the mirror. You are definitely feeling the effects of the two gin fizzes. "Pretty good for someone who was crying just 20 minutes ago" Crowe says with a cheerful tone. You smile at her "Thanks, it's my Tenebrae mouth, it drowns out all other imperfections". You both laugh and head back out. As you re-enter the party, you can see things are starting to get out of control. Axis has decided that he wants to challenge Lib at arm wrestling, Luche and Tredd are having an extremely loud argument over who the strongest Astral is, and Pelna is challenging Nyx to a warping contest where they must warp from the roof of the Citadel, to an adjacent one, and back again. You roll your eyes and sit next to Pelna when you see that Gladio and his boy band have overtaken your table. You look at Titus. He has removed his armor and is sitting there in a tight long-sleeve shirt that shows off his built physique. He feels you looking at him and taps his hand three times on the table which has become his secret code for FOLL-OW-ME. You give him a one minute lead, then scan the rooftop. Everyone else is busy with someone else so you walk briskly in the direction he walked. You enter the hall where the bathrooms are, and see an open door that you would swear was closed before. You enter timidly, not knowing if this is where he disappeared to. Suddenly the door closes and there is an arm at your waist turning your whole body around in a single movement and pushing your back against the wall. Titus places his left leg between yours and wraps your head into the powerful grip of his hands and descends upon your lips. His sweet tongue swipes your lips, begging for entrance. You are so weak, you think to yourself and open your mouth fully to reciprocate. You haven't seen or talked to him since last night, and your body needs him. You bring your hands to rest softly on his pecs while grinding your sex against his thigh. You blissfully drown in the movement of your mouths clashing together. He breaks away and breathlessly places his forehead on yours and stares deeply into your eyes. You pull your courage from somewhere within the depths of your body. "Where were you today" you say in an accusatory tone. The look he gives you is one of pure guilt. He gently kisses your swollen lips and lets go. "I was busy" he says taking a few steps back, his tone matter-of-fact. "Busy"? you retort. "Too busy to send a simple text letting me know that you're ok"? "I've told you SO MANY times y/n not to ask me about my business" he says, beginning to raise his voice. "Yes, you have, but you keep disappearing on me Titus, what am I supposed to think"? "It doesn't matter what you think" he shoots back, anger beginning to rise. "Oh, so yesterday you love me, today I don't matter" you say quietly, as you can hear people in the hallway. "I didn't say that...why do you twist my words"? "You just said that what I think doesn't matter to you, yes or no"? "That's not what I meant, you know that" "Do I"? "You are gone and out of communication for...12...17 hours today". "Two weeks ago it was 22, time before that, 19". You get up and into his face as much as you can to a man of 6'4". "Riddle me this Titus, if I disappeared consistently like that, and came home and told you that you were completely out of line to ask me about it, what exactly would you think"! He turns towards you in a rage that you have never seen from him. His hand goes flat against your abdomen and he forces your body to slam back against the wall behind you. With a low growl, he pounds his fist next to your head, cracking the drywall, his nose touching yours. "You have no idea what I am dealing with or what I am trying to do" his face red and beginning to sweat. "Be grateful that you get to live in your little world of Anaks and goblins because I assure you that there are far worst daemons in this world". Seeing your tears, and feeling the fear he has placed into your quivering body, he pauses and takes two steps back. "And they're coming"

[datinglove07-blog-blog-blog]

50 Meet-Cute Couple Stories That Will Make You Believe In Love Again 

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50 Meet-Cute Couple Stories That Will Make You Believe In Love Again 

1.I was waitressing, he came in all the time with his friends. Him and I became friendly, played jokes on each other, he grew to be one of my favorite regular customers.

Then, there were a few weeks when he didn’t is an indication at all, and I realized that I actually missed him. I didn’t have any of his contact details. I told myself that if he ever came back in, I needed to take the chance and ask him out.

Next night he came in, I guess we both had the same idea. He asked me before I could. I wrote my number down on a piece of receipt paper( which he still has ), we went out the next night, and we’ve been together ever since. He’s the love of my life.

2.Way back in 1980, I was working in south FL. A guy I worked with was retiring soon and had bought a vacation cabin in north GA. He showed me a picture of the cabin and posing in front was a dark haired beauty who he identified as his daughter. I remarked she was very attractive.

Forward a few weeks and he tells me the daughter had just broken up with her boyfriend, was in the dumps, and asked if I wanted to ask her out.

We went on a blind date, were married 2 years later, and now have three grown children and scheming where to go for our 37 th anniversary.

3.We were at a business networking event where the rule was that you were not allowed to buy drinks for yourself, whatever you bought you had to put it into someone else’s hand as an opener to dialogue. So this gorgeous brunette strolled up to me, put a gin-and-tonic in my hand, and introduced herself.

Hello, wife.

4.I considered him in the grocery store, and I thought he was handsome. I approached him in frozen foods as he was looking at a 5 lb. container of chicken nuggets. I asked if he was married, and when he said no, I asked if he would like to take me out some time. He set the bag of chicken nuggets on his head like he was about to pass out and we both chuckled. We are married with 4 year old twin boys now. :) 10/10 would recommend approaching a handsome stranger in the supermarket.

5.Soccer game. I was watching my good “girl friend” at the time play. Game ends and I go down to the field to congratulate her. Asked her where the other team was from, and I never heard of the place, so I said fuck it, went over to the cutest daughter on the other team, gave her my number, and here I am 4.3 years later with a girl I hope to marry. Having a pair of balls and saying fucking it can either pay off tremendously or back fire horribly.

6.I am a Match.com commercial for the wife. I had sent her a message after her account expired. She renewed her account, got my message, and 10 years later we are married with 3 kids and a dog.

7.We were both character musicians at Disney. We danced down the street together and couldn’t even ensure each other’s actual bodies at all, but the sweaty banter afterwards did it.

8.Online dating. Moved half-way across the country to be with her. I always wanted a nerdy-gamer daughter for a girlfriend and I got my wish.

Totally worth the move.

Cannot underline how fantastic online dating is to introverts, once you get over the ridiculous sum of rejection, and had recognized that patience is your friend, and lastly, learn to be honest and put endeavour into your messages/ profile.

9.OkCupid. After wafting through about 2 years of bullshit, failed dates, ghosting, etc I messaged this daughter. At that phase I was desensitized; why bother putting endeavour into your first message when 95% of daughters don’t reply?

I hit her with some genuinely corny father joke and she did answer and giggled. We got to talking, eventually agreed to meet up for a beer.

We agreed going in that we’d began with only a beer and lay everything out on the table. If either of us wanted to cancel the date we would , no hard feelings. A brew turned into two, was transformed into dinner. That turned into a second date, then a third. The first year was transformed into a second, then a third.

Now we’re engaged and simply booked a wedding venue.

10.That bitch t-boned me. She said she’d let me take her to dinner if we didn’t get the insurance involved. Having typed that out, I now ensure I get fucked that day on so many levels.

11.Worked together. I was supposed to have a party for all people at the job. My heat went out that day so I had to cancel. She didn’t get the message and presented up. Asked her if she wanted to take some shoots of of Jack Daniel’s and get “warm”. Twelve years later still taking shots and getting “warm” on a regular basis!

12.No idea where I got the nerve but she was sitting on a blanket alone watching a group of us doing medieval combat reenactments. Didn’t get a good look at her before I plopped down beside her and said hi. She turned and smiled and I immediately supposed,” Oh hell. She is way out of my league .” Turns out I get her on the rebound nearly 32 years ago. Still out of my league.

13.I was at a birthday party for a friend. He was the friend of my friend’s boyfriend. We hit it off right away.

14.We were both in a psychiatric hospital. We’ve been together almost 13 years. I was there for depression and anxiety, he was there to avoid a homeless shelter. I know it sounds crazy, but it kinda works out for us. We’ve gotten in a much better financial situation.

15.We met at a friend’s Halloween party- I have always been a huge Harry Potter fan, and of course, he was dressed as Harry Potter. The rest is history!

16.We all met up at the home of a mutual friend to go to a festival together. I arrived first and was told to open the door when she knocked. She saw me and said “You’re not mutual friend! ” We drunkenly hooked up at the party subsequently that night and are now merrily married with children.

17.I sat in the parking lot at a gas station. He parked his truck on the corner where you aren’t supposed to park. I screamed at him. We got married.

18.College! We had a few class together and he kept staring at me from afar. I went up to him one day and said hi, he fell the bagel he was feeing and I knew he had it bad for me. That was almost 9 years ago and we’ve been married for nearly 5 years. He’s the best thing to ever happen to me…

19.Reddit, actually! We were both active in a dating sub( a sub about a dating app , not a sub specifically for dating) which objective up creating a fitness challenge( members of the general notion began as, improve yourself so you can be a better partner and find someone !) We were placed in the same fitness group and genuinely hit it off. 3.5 years later, we’re planning our wedding.

20.On the train. He was on his style back from find a client, I was on my way back from working at a trade carnival. Neither of us felt especially like talking but somehow we didn’t stop talking once we started. We exchanged numbers and kept messaging/ talking backward and forward and started dating not quite a month subsequently. That fateful train ride was 4 years ago. We’ve been happy with each other( and uncharacteristically talkative around each other) ever since and got married last year.

21.First day of grad school, she was sitting behind me and I was typing on my iPad. She showed me that if I took two thumbs and slid them apart over the keyboard the keyboard would shift and I could use my thumbs easier to type. We are now happily married and typing on my iPad is much easier.

22.In the work infringe room. He was putting a Totinos party pizza in the microwave( poor college kid) and I was like, “Those don’t go in a microwave.” Married almost 12 years now, I’m still bossy but his cook abilities have improved.

23.I had a coworker who defined me up on a blind date with his sister in statute. It was a bbq at his house. When I got there, I saw this gorgeous female with an ass so fantastic it brought tears to my eyes. And speaking of eyes, hers were magical. So bright and when she smiles, her entire face illuminated up. Unfortunately this was his wife. Her sister was nice but not for me. I thought about the guys spouse almost every day. But I never acted on my feelings. A couple of years later, he got divorced and she called me. She had been thinking about me, too. We dated for 3 months and got married.

18 years later, still going strong. And dat ass … mmm mmmm mmm.

24.She was the first person to get in my taxi the first day I started driving cab. We’re still married 25 years later.

25.We both worked component hour at Macy’s while going to school. Unbeknownst to one another, we both had a rule of not dating anyone that we worked with. I casually knew her since she was a flyer and worked different departments, but I would find her every once in a while working the department that was on the way to the punch in/ out clock. One day, while entering the store for run, she was leaving and she tells me tomorrow is her last day. I asked for her number and we’ve been together ever since. That was back in 1985.

26.She worked at the cookie store in the mall, and I ran at a knife store nearby. I would close my store for hours on end to hang out with her.

27 . She was a personal shopper at Macy’s. My mom, appearing out for her son, told this really cute girl she was helping find a jacket for to” look up my son on facebook.’

Well, she did, and 6 years later( 2016) we got married, and my mommy died 6 weeks after our wedding. She was so proud of what she did. As we sit here expecting our first infant, I wish she was here every day. She would be so proud. I miss her so much.

28.Ok Cupid. First time I tried online dating, and I was the LAST person he tried fulfilling on online dating. I didn’t put a painting up, and “hes taken” a chance anyways. Married with a kid and a home 7 years later

29.We met at work and casually dated for a few weeks before I got really sick. I was hospitalized for a while and it was very traumatic. He insisted on remaining by my side throughout the whole ordeal, and we are merrily married 10 years later.

30.A few weeks after a really rough breakup my friends decided to take me out to cheer me up. I met my current SO at the bar that night and we hit it off. I aimed up taking him home that night supposing perhaps I just needed rebound sex( I had never taken a guy home from the bar prior to this ). He objective up texting me early the next morning and we’ve been inseparable ever since. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.

31.I was unemployed and had a job interview in the city( NYC) and was a few mins early for my interview so I stopped by a Starbucks to get a beaker of coffee( I know Starbucks is terrible but I wanted a cold brew) while on line I noticed her but didn’t do anything because I was focused on this interview. Anyways she had an issue with her order and turned around and accidentally bumped spilled her coffee all over me, she apologized and offered to pay for my dry cleaning and we exchanged numbers and talked texting and objective up dating. Aimed up didn’t going to that interview but aimed up get a better task so is not merely did I get the girl I also got a job.

32.I’m a commercial airline pilot and she’s a flight attendant. We fulfilled working together years ago when I was first start now as a co-pilot.

I’m planning on retiring early in a few years, she quit her job about 5 years ago to stay home and take care of our kids.

We own a bed and breakfast out in northern California my spouse runs while I’m away, and I’m looking forward to retirement so I can spend more time with her and the kids and helping her operate the place.

33.I was enjoying a cigarette on the smoking deck( designated smoking area) when a girl “re coming out”, sat down and said, “God dammit, fuck this.” I told her to watch her mouth. She said, “Fuck you motherfucker, I can say whatever the fuck I want to say.” We have been married for 10 years last February.

34.My church choir( college freshmen congregation) had seven women in it. I was the only human. After our first performance in a service, a girl came up and asked me who I was, and complimented me on being brave enough to sing in front of everyone.

A few weeks later she’s leading a mid-week venerate thing, and asks if I could sing something solo. I tell her yes, but I require an accompanist. She says she plays piano. I already thought she was cute, but when she started playing at our run-through, I was so breath-taken I missed my entrance.

It took me a while to ask her out, but four years later, we’re blithely married.

35.We met on Neopets as kids and became best friends. Years afterward we realized we were both into daughters so it worked out perfectly and we’re engaged.

36.Staring at her boob to drive a pervert away.

So we were in stage crew in high school. There was a healthy divide of 40+ girls and 4-5 guys including me. There was a lot of flirting, and well … Just naughty behavior all around. Usually boundaries were well respected and everyone had a good time constructing sets and props.

My friend, the perv in this story, is annoying this daughter and I can see her inconvenience. I walk over and ask what he’s doing and she responds :P TAGEND

” He’s staring at my boob and he’s not allowed to !”

To which I answered,” Am I allowed to ?”

She said yes and I proceeded to enjoy the sight of her massive boobs for a few seconds until I watch him in peripheral walk away pissed off. Afterwards, I apologize for his behavior and go back to work. She started talking to me more and eventually we discovered ourselves in a relationship now going on 7 years this July!

37.The day I gratified my husband in a college acting class. Our first class ice breaker was to walk around, and every time the prof said stop we had to stare into the eyes of the person closest to us.

We did this for 5 rounds. Guess who I had to stare at all five times?

We somehow got partnered up for our final acting scene despite not picking each other. We practiced for a few weeks and got to know each other and started going on dates after that. By the time we finished the class we were all over each other.

38.The scene: a shitty three tale home with a sinking floor supported by a makeshift pillar in the basement. Every surface is sticky.

I’m in the back, taking a break from my friends in the midst of a small party. I love them deep but also really wanted everyone to just sort of disappear for a little while. You know, how you usually feel on a Friday night that feels exactly like the last two dozen Friday nights.

I needed someone to complain to about how much I disliked everyone else at the party at that moment. Assure a cute redhead I vaguely recollected from one class and was drunk enough to launch into a little ranting without much of an introduction. Turns out she need to rant too.

39.First class on my first day in college, I see this beautiful girl waiting outside my class for the professor to unlock the door, and realise I have to be with her.

We started dating after a few weeks, and are married now.

Love at first sight.

40.We met at work! We get hired 6 months apart to design bridges and neither of us had ever designed a bridge before, although we had all the needed qualifications to make our boss believe we were capable of learning this.( In other terms, we were both fresh out of engineering grad school and had a strong background in analysis .)

Our desks were side by side, and we liked each other immediately. Our dynamic was very much” office spouse/ office spouse “. It stayed like that for two years. He was very good at designing bridges, as it turned out, and moved up speedily. I was merely ok at designing bridges, and was not moving up, so I took a chore in a different department( thankfully, I have moved up well here ), and after I left, we realized we missed each other, and started dating.

We live together now, and couldn’t be happier.( He still designs bridges .)

41.College my sophomore year. I was on the men’s lacrosse squad and she was on the women’s lacrosse team. It was the first week of school( I only transferred from another college) and I was sitting with a few people at lunch. She strolled in and I asked my friends who she was and they let me know. I said ” I’m going to end up marrying that daughter .” She had a BF of 5 years( afterward found out that he was a dick) at the time and some guy that plainly liked her said ” good luck trying to get that …” She eventually sat down at the same table as me and we chatted. Apparently one of the other girls on her squad let her know what I said about marrying her later that day. I received a text a few hours later from a random number and it was her. That’s where it all started. We were very good friends for a while and she eventually aimed things with her bf and we started dating a few months later. We have been together for 6 years and we are getting married next year.

42.She sat down next to me on the first day of grad school. We both were into Neil Gaiman and Modern Poetry. I let her borrow the first few trades of The Sandman.

After that we started hanging out more, I demonstrated her around the city( she was from out of township ). Bought her a develop pass with $20 on it, but I was slacken to make a move. If it wasn’t for her roommate saying,” Dude, guys don’t buy develop pass for you if they don’t like you ,” we might not be together.

Been together 7 years.

43.She was my waitress when I was out with some friends. I left my number( first and only time ever) she called and 19 years later we are still together.

44.I was really into Scott Pilgrim vs The World when it came out in theaters when I was in high school. Bought all the graphic fictions, find it 4 times in theaters, bought the soundtracks, and bought the video game when it came out. I was obsessed.

After classes aimed and as I would stroll to the bus, I noticed on occasion this daughter walking down the dorms wearing a Scott Pilgrim shirt. I had to meet this girl!

Well the day came during a field trip to Gettysburg and there she was wearing the shirt. I get so nervous, had to work up the heroism, and she was also with a friend who is best friend’s with my previous girlfriend. Oh boy this was going to be tough.

Ended up not being too bad. I asked her the obvious question if she was a Scott Pilgrim fan and we hit it off from there surprisingly. Even more a coincidence, when we got to the buses, all I wanted to do was talk to her more about Scott Pilgrim and we didn’t because she sat next to her friend but she was a seat behind me, this entire field trip. It was destiny.

Anyways we’re close to 8 years strong together and will watch Scott Pilgrim once a year.

45.We fulfilled online on this is something that cringey anime-themed roleplay website and have been together for 4 years and married now. We try to forget about the site but some times we reminisce and wince together.

46.His mothers bought the house next to my grandparents home when his mommy was pregnant with him and I was two. I assume that I satisfied him when he came home from the hospital? It’s not something I recollect, he’s just always been a part of my life.

There was a period of time where we hadn’t seen each other for over eight years, and one night I was Facebook stalking a second cousin of mine and my old childhood friend’s mommy popped up! Through her I detected him, reached out, and within three months we were dating. Next month we celebrate our third marriage anniversary.

47.We were in the same class for a program for people on welfare.

Soon after the conflicts aimed, I determined a task in the city. I recommended that she apply since we were still hiring, and she got hired too! Not soon after that, I helped her out by letting her know my home had a room open to rent( 1 house 5 bedrooms, I was a tenant ), and she moved in. I wasn’t seeking any kind of relationship with her.

One day I heard her chuckling while watching Youtube and it was the most beautiful and genuine laugh. I thought to myself “fuck”. A couple weeks later we were watching Stranger Things and we started holds hands and cuddling.

We’re getting married next year

48.Technically we shared a hospital room at birth. Both our moms were stuck together. My mom is his aunt’s best friend( 20+ years ). The session we remember came subsequently. About 6 years old. I told him he was ” super duper handsome” and leaned in to kiss him because I’d seen it on a show. He kicked me in the vagina and ran away.

The boy aimed up chasing me for years. We ultimately started dating at 18 and now 10 years and 2 beautiful sons later, we are still going strong!

49.In a hot tub. I was about 14 and her best friend was dating my best friend. I set my limb around her and said ” do you come here often ?” Knowing it was an extremely cheesy pickup line. Now, about 16 years later, I still use that line on her when she’s in the bathroom, in bed, in the kitchen…

50.I was very drunk at a house party in college and was building my way to the bathroom to run throw up when I insured a girl who just lost a drinking game, and had to chug a beaker of a bunch of different alcohols. She was like she actually didn’t want to, and I figured since I was going to go throw up anyway, I might as well do it.

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